Prenatal Roots of Attachment

Excerpts from the article, "Prenatal Roots of Attachment" by Rien Verdult, in the book, Handbook of Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology (2021) published by Springer. Collected by Bruce Dickson for his own healing. Also possible to make out of this sequence, a positive closed eye prenatal journey guided meditation. Note ~ The following can be made more accessible with two changes: - Per the Waldorf folks, replace he and his with feminine pronouns for all prenatal and peri-natal and very young child. - As psychology, this is psychology of the ego of the body deva, the basic self, the etheric body--not "the baby." Add to the below, earlier mis-carriages of the same soul. A large fraction of mis-carriages are failed implantation.

Preconception > Journey > Embodiment versus Splitting The degree to which the pregnancy is wanted, Unwanted pregnancies can be linked to maladaptive maternal behaviors and increased stress and anxiety, characteristics and biography of sperm, characteristics and biography of egg. Conception > Fusion > Trust in embodied, physical-material, life versus Obstruction to embodying in physical-material Creation Affectionate conception vs apathy, accident or rape, in conception if trauma or shock occurs, a first splitting in consciousness occurs. In an affectionate conception, the cells will reach out for each other, will open, and are longing to connect. A basis for trust in life and living is formed. The foundation is laid for secure attachment. In a traumatic conception, the sperm and egg become defensive, can withdraw themselves, can turn away, or can become closed or impermeable. Life is obstructed. Avoidant attachment.

Implantation > Connection > Survival versus Neardeath (235) If the blastocyst finds a fertile spot on the endometrial epithelium, then a basic sense of connectedness starts to develop and lays the foundation for secure attachment. His survival is guaranteed. The negative pole of this development crisis is a life-threatening and frightening experience, because the blastocyst gets too little nutrition and energy. If the uterus is not providing enough essential nutrients, then life is at risk. Implantation can be a near-death experience that can be stored in consciousness. The stored message can be: “I have to be on alert, whenever (236) I connect to somebody, because I cannot be sure that my basic needs are fulfilled.” An ambivalent attachment pattern can develop out of this bio- chemical message. Possible twin loss “vanishing twin” drama. When healthy implantation occurs, the rapid development of the embryo can begin. In 2 months, a complete person grows out of the fertilized egg. All organs develop, the skeleton becomes visible, and the senses start to function. The embryo gets its physical human characteristics.

Umbilical affect > Exchange > Facilitation versus Deprivation or Poisoning Exchange between the embryo and the uterus wall intensifies. This happens over the umbilical cord. Emotional messages are translated into biochemical messages and received and understood by the fetus. The fetus can be deprived from basic needs. If this is a severe and lasting condition, and the fetus has to slow down his/her development, then the fetus can go into a para-sympathetic shock and become paralyzed. The fetus can become suicidal and desire its own death. It can lead to a avoidant attachment pattern. A toxic umbilical affect is characterized by poisonous messages that the fetus receives, like a rejection, emotional confusion, etc. This can result in ambivalent attachment patterns.

Maternal Discovery > Recognition > Being desired versus Rejection Mother's first and spontaneous emotional reaction to her possible pregnancy creates an emotional climate. This is converted into a complex mixture of biochemical messages to the baby. If its mother or her body rejects or denies the pregnancy, because this is deeply unwanted for her, then the fetus can feel intensely rejected. Biochemical messages will restrain his/her selfconfidence and his/her self-actualization. Depression, self-destructive behavior, or

aggression can be clinically linked to prenatal rejection (Emerson 1998b). As research showed the consequences of being unwanted can become manifest many years later, especially in adolescence (Häsing and Janus 1994).

The positive pole of this development crisis is the affirmation of its existence. If the baby is consciously wanted by his parents and if his/her mother’s body is responding with acceptance and joy to his/her presence, then the fetus can feel desired. “I am the one for my mother.” If its mother is deeply pleased about her pregnancy, then her baby gets a “hormonal” affirmation. He gets the right to live.

Birth > Transition > Moving forward versus Being stuck Learning how to breathe, or learning to adapt to his/her mother’s emotional state. Birth is coming. How will an overwhelming change be navigated and made possible? It's possible the baby feels invaded in the birth process and feels out of control of its own well being. caesarean birth can be life saving for the baby, or sudden, unexpected, rough, and frightening, leaving the baby in despair and chaos. Tactile defensiveness is one of the most prominent features of a caesarean-section baby, making it for the mother more difficult to bond.

Imprinting moment > Contact > Affiliation versus Isolation The negative pole of the continuum is finding absence or rejection in her eyes, leading to painful loneliness and isolation. Immediately after birth, when the baby is laid on the belly of the mother a magic moment can occur, the so-called imprinting moment. Research by Klaus, Kenell, and Klaus et al. (1995) was a pioneering work, changing the birth practice. The baby needs to restore contact with his/her mother’s body immediately after birth, without delay. This could be done by leaving the infant on his/ her mother’s belly for 20 min, waiting till the umbilical cord stops pulsing, so that the baby can come to rest by restoring his/her physiological equilibrium and make eye contact with his/her mother. The positive pole of this developmental crisis is: restoring contact. When the baby has found the breast of his mother and can look her in the eyes, then he/she can find reassurance and affiliation.

Psychological birth > Separation > Individuality versus Stagnation The infant starts to experience that it can also function without its mother. A baby with more positive attachment experiences will enjoy exploring his/her world, learn new things, and grow up. It will discover his/her possibilities and boundaries. An insecure ambivalent infant will be more anxious, keeping his/her world small, and sticking closely to his/her mother. He/she is sometimes literally clinging to his/her mother. He/she can be frustrated and activated quickly. He/she is afraid of new things and strangers. His/her development stagnates. The avoidant infant is often called an “easy and quiet” baby. No fussing and clinging, more withdrawn, little or no exploration. In insecure infants, the psychological birth begins later and takes more time.

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