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AT I M E C H I N E S E A U C T I O N 5 7 8 1
WIN BIG!
ENJOY THE WEDDING WITH NO FINANCIAL WORRIES! / 29 AIRBNB ADVENTURES / 71 FINISH SHAS IN ONE YEAR AND RECEIVE $15,000 / 130 CIA SPY ESCAPE & EVASION COURSE / 167
LITTLE PINK CUPCAKES A 9 year-old boy shares his story / 14 / PAGE 118
Moshe with His New Baby Sister SOWING WITH TEARS. REAPING WITH JOY: INTERVIEW WITH AARON & EVELYN MANOPLA
IN THE PARKING LOT A new friendship traces back to a deserted hospital parking lot / 82
ALL IN WHITE A nursery volunteer and her private struggles / 154
LETTER FROM FOUNDER
January/February 2021/Volume 20/Issue I/ATIME Dreams is published five times a year January, March, April, June and August by A Torah Infertility Medium of Exchange – 1310 48th Street #406, Brooklyn NY, 11219 Postage paid at post offices.
Dear Friends,
L
ittle me always dreamed of being a Mommy someday… In those early years, my dreams were shaped by baby blankets, fuzzy teddy bears, baby carriages and cuddly newborns. I didn’t think past the pink-cheeked wonders. After years of dreaming, I was finally zoche to that longago vision of an innocent little being cuddled in my arms. It was only then that I began to understand how far-reaching our dreams really are. Sagging shelves lined with photo albums tell the story of that dream. An upsherin. A bar mitzvah. A wedding! And then, with the help of Hashem, precious little neshamos graced us with the title of Bubby and Zeidy. I made a promise, all those years ago, that when Hashem would turn our dreams into reality - we would do the same for others. No one would have to make this journey on their own. And when I meet our dear, courageous couples and admire the pictures they’re thrilled to share, I feel the weight of generations resting on A TIME’s broad shoulders. I see a little upsherin boy and remember his mother’s tears as she wondered if she would forever remain an AlmostMommy. I scrutinize a kallah walking off into her future, and tearfully recall the day she was born after so many long, endless years. Generations. Eternity. They’re big words…that can be brought to life only by a big heart. Open your hearts to those who dream, and in that merit may Hashem fulfill your dreams forever after.
Brany Rosen
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SPECIAL RAFFLES Family Trip to Israel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .8 (Drawing: 27 Adar 5781 - 3/11/21)
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154 5 Minutes with Mrs. Chumi Friedman . . . . 34 Hotel for Shabbos . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 50 What to say (and not to say) to someone living with infertility . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66 Dear Brand-New Mommy. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 102 Shabbos Mommy . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 138
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Special Thank You . . . . . . . . . . . . . 178 Elite Sponsors . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 188 Live Auction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 193 Order Information/Form . . . . . . 194
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ATIME TIMELINE As its name connotes, ATIME keeps up with the times, adding and adjusting its services to best serve our community.
SHABBOS NEAR THE HOSPITAL
LOSS SUPPORT Miscarriages and stillbirths are finally faced head-on with ATIME’s support program. The Loss Support Program goes global, distributing its trademark support packets internationally.
GOING DIGITAL FOUNDING OF ATIME A dream and a vision morphed into reality with the founding of this revolutionary initiative. The famous helpline, quarterly magazine and innovative support group were the highlights of that first year.
The famous atime.org website made a splash, along with its members’ forum that forms an international support group.
1996
1993
EDUCATIONAL EVENTS The first educational event was launched, paving the way for frequent medical events featuring renowned physicians sharing information, options, and advice.
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When a couple must be in close proximity to the hospital over Shabbos or Yom Tov, ATIME will step in to help with Courier Services, food and accommodations.
TRAILBLAZING SHABBATON INSURANCE ADVOCACY ATIME influences the amendment of a NY State law, mandating insurance coverage for many infertility treatments. Simultaneously, couples receive guidance in obtaining available funding.
The initial ATIME annual Shabbaton, the first of many, was introduced to widespread acclaim. Couples anticipate the yearly getaway with others traveling the same path.
ATIME UK
MEALS WITH HEART
ATIME services were expanded to the UK with the first of many ATIME UK Shabbatons taking place in 2008, an island of serenity for our European members.
Meals with Heart is launched, to provide comforting meals for couples during hard times.
The launching of this women’s health program spreads awareness about crucial topics and provides resources for every stage of life.
In a courageous move, ATIME begins providing adoption services for the placement of Jewish babies. Resources, support, and advice are made available to prospective parents.
2004
Our rabbinical committee is comprised of leading Rabbonim and Torah figures and physicians who train Rabbonim worldwide on the intricacies of infertility in Jewish law.
HASHGACHA The ATIME Hashgacha program provides professionally trained mashgichim and mashgichos for all procedures requiring supervision.
R-TIME R-Time classes are set up to provide an enjoyable outlet to our women in the form of a variety of courses on creative interests.
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INSTITUTE OF HALACHA AND TECHNOLOGY
ATIME partners with Weill Cornell Medicine to research new laboratory technology to help couples for whom science does not currently offer any options.
CHAVA PROGRAM
ADOPTION SERVICES
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NEW LABORATORY TECHNOLOGY
SHAS-A-THON With the backing of Gedolei Yisroel, the first Shasathon takes the world by storm. Its combined goals of fundraising, raising awareness, and increasing Torah study form a powerful triad.
MEETING THE COVID CHALLENGE ATIME went all-out in its efforts to meet and surmount formidable challenges, making the impossible happen at medical centers worldwide. Zoom and phone sessions were amped up to enable broader access.
PHONE SUPPORT GROUPS The telephone support system becomes an instant success, with couples gaining coping skills, guidance, and empathy under professional therapeutic moderation.
The name ATIME is chosen because the word infertility, which is unspoken until this point, has to be concealed in an acronym. It alludes to the comfort that everything has ATIME.
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Hi, all of you out there who are looking at this page. I find it funny that I'm talking and someone else is writing everything down for you to read, but they
told me that it’s a good idea to do this. I mean, it's just a story that happened to me last year and I
don't think it's so fascinating. It's definitely not like all the scary comics stories I like to read...
But what does a 9-year-old boy like me know? Here goes: 578 1
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I
t’s Motzei Shabbos and I’m sitting on the couch with my father. He’s smiling but it’s that kind of funny smile that adults sometimes use when they really want to cry but they’re covering it up. “So, Shaya, tell these nice people about your rebbi,” my father says. “Rebbi Mendel, right?” I ask, just to make sure. I’ve had many rebbeim since I entered yeshivah and I don’t want to start describing the wrong person. That would be embarrassing. “Right, of course,” Tatty nods. “Rebbi Mendel, who taught you last year in fourth grade.” Okay. No problem. I can do this. “Well, Rebbi Mendel was one of my most favorite rebbeim,” I start. Tatty chuckles. “He says that every year,” Tatty whispers to the man sitting opposite us, on the armchair. I hear every word but it’s fine. “He is a really special rebbi,” I continue. “See, when a boy comes late by mistake – not because he missed the bus, but just because he didn’t hear the bell ring – Rebbi Mendel understands. I mean, really understands. He doesn’t scream at him or punish him. He just gives a little shake of his head that means, ‘Go sit down and make sure it doesn’t happen again but I know it was a mistake.’ That’s the kind of rebbi he is.” The people in our living room are smiling. “Go on, Shaya,” Tatty whispers. “Tell them about that day in class when you told Rebbi Mendel about your aunt and uncle.”
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I smile. Oh. So that’s what this is all about. I should have guessed. “It was just another regular day in yeshivah,” I begin, and I see the men leaning forward. I hope they won’t be disappointed when they hear my story. It’s not scary or anything. It’s just…something that happened. “Rebbi Mendel was teaching Chumash, like he does every Monday morning. We were learning about Yitzchok Avinu and how he davened so, so hard to have children,” I say. Everyone is still listening and I’m actually beginning to enjoy this. Usually, I have to speak real loud and fast to get my friends to listen to what I’m saying. I look away from all the curious eyes and smiling faces. I need to concentrate and make sure I’m repeating everything acc-ur-ate. That’s what Tatty said I should do. When I close my eyes, I can see myself sitting in the front row, right near Rebbi Mendel’s desk. This is exactly what happened that morning in yeshivah: “So Yitzchok davened. And Rivka davened,” Rebbi Mendel says. “They cried and begged Hashem to answer their tefillos to be blessed with children.” Suddenly, I’m very curious. I never thought about it before, but now the question is just eating up my entire mind and I can’t even concentrate on anything Rebbi Mendel is saying. I raise my hand. Quietly, at first, but when Rebbi Mendel doesn’t notice I start making those huh huh noises that always grab his attention. “Yes, Shaya,” Rebbi Mendel says with
I think his eyes swallowed some dust while I was asking my questions. “And Rebbi has a lot of children?” I ask the last question that was nibbling at my mind. This time, the blinking is a lot worse. There must be loads of dust sitting in Rebbi’s eyes! It’s very quiet in the classroom. All my friends are looking at Rebbi Mendel and I see that they’re just as curious as I am. They should thank me for asking these questions in class, when they could all hear the answers. Suddenly, I'm very curious. I never “Err…no,” Rebbi Mendel says slowly. “I thought about it before, but – we – don’t have any children.” He looks out now the question is just eating the window even though there’s nothing interestup my entire mind and I can't ing there. I know because I also turn to look. “Not even concentrate on anything yet,” he says quietly. It’s really, really quiet Rebbi Mendel is saying... in the classroom and I feel a tiny bit…um…weird. I can’t really describe the feeling but it’s just this creeping, crawling feeling slithering up head to Chaim Zev, who’s raising his hand my back and spreading into the place even louder than I did. where I think my heart is supposed to be. “For how long?” I ask, and when Rebbi Rebbi looks…different. Sad, I think. Mendel seems surprised at the question, I I feel bad that I made him sad by askexplain it better. “How long is Rebbi maring him such funny questions. Maybe he ried already?” forgot that he doesn’t have children and I think it’s the first time I’ve seen I just reminded him so now he’s sad and someone blink so fast and so many times quiet. without stopping. “Well, Rebbi, I have a great idea,” I say “Uh…eight years,” Rebbi Mendel finalquickly, when I see that Rebbi Mendel ly answers, when his eyes stop blinking. a smile. “You wanted to say something?” I put down my hand. It was beginning to hurt from all that waving in the air. “Rebbi, I just wanted to know,” I say quickly, before he moves on to another boy. “Is Rebbi married?” Rebbi Mendel smiles and his eyes twinkle like when he’s laughing very hard. “Yes, Boruch Hashem,” he answers and I see that he’s already turning his
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needs my help to get out of this sad, sad minute. “I can help!” He smiles but he’s not happy. I can tell. I know these kinds of things. “Really,” I say again, to make sure that Rebbi Mendel knows it’s for real. “My aunt and uncle help people who don’t have children. Especially people like Rebbi, who are married like forever and they don’t yet have any babies or carriages or even a crib in their house.” Rebbi is blinking again. They must get the janitor to clean up in here. “And who’s your aunt and uncle?” 18
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Rebbi asks with a funny, funny voice. It’s almost crumbling, that voice of his, and it scares me a little. “They’re the Rosens,” I answer him. “You know, Uncle Shaul Rosen? Aunt Brany?” He doesn’t recognize their names and I almost laugh out loud. Everyone knows my aunt and uncle! He must have forgotten right this minute. “They send out loads of papers and booklets,” I try to jog his memory. “And they even have a real name, like the title of a book!”
Rebbi is smiling and nodding and he's even writing something down in his notebook. I hope it's not a chutzpah mark. I just wanted to help him get the dust out of his eyes...
Now Rebbi is smiling again and I know that he’s listening to every word I say. “What’s the title?” he asks. I think. Hmm.. I know the name, but looks like this memory-problem thing is catchy. It just slipped my mind. “It’s like a club,” I describe. “With parties and meetings and stuff. And – oh, now I remember! They’re time. Like, when they talk to my parents, they’re always saying things like, A time this and A time that.” Rebbi is smiling and nodding and he’s even writing something down in his
notebook. I hope it’s not a chutzpah mark. I just wanted to help him get the dust out of his eyes. I snap back to the men sitting across me in our living room, and I sigh like grown-ups sometimes do when they have nothing to say. Sigh. “So that’s what I told Rebbi that day in class,” I tell them. They’re looking at me, smiling and not-smiling at the same time. I think one of them is crying, but it can’t be. I didn’t say anything sad. I just told them about me and Rebbi and our funny conversation in class. “That’s when he contacted A TIME, right?” one man asks Tatty. Tatty nods. “I didn’t know anything about Shaya’s part in this,” he says hoarsely. “Last week, when Rebbi Mendel’s daughter was born, he called me up and shared the story. He wanted to invite my little Shaya to the Kiddush.” Now all the men are talking and their voices are hoarse and scratchy and crackly. “Unbelievable,” the tall one says. “Your little boy was the good shaliach. What a zechus.” It’s late and I’m tired, but I agree with that man. It was such a big zechus. I really enjoyed the little pink cookies and cupcakes that Rebbi let me take from his Kiddush. He said I could take as many as I want. What a zechus. 578 1
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Sponsored by Aviva and Scott Miller In honor of Brany Rosen for her selfless and tireless dedication
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Sponsored by Joey Arakanchi in honor of my wife Michelle
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TA M PA F LORI D A COM M UN I TY F LO R I D A M O V E20 20 @ GM AIL .C OM
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Beautiful wood kitchen with granite countertops, including design and installation by the professionals. Value: $24,500
Prize Dedicated לע”נ רבקה בת אברהם ע”ה
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5
MINUTES with MRS. CHUMI FRIEDMAN
Mrs. Chumi Friedman’s team will do anything in their power to help couples experiencing perinatal or infant loss. This month, we spoke with the Director of ATIME’s HUG Program about how she supports couples on their journey through loss.
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What is the HUG program?
The HUG program, which stands for Hope, Understanding, Guidance, supports couples who are experiencing perinatal or infant loss. We offer medical guidance, emotional support, and physical support to close to a thousand couples a year.
2
What do these types of support look like?
The medical guidance will be how to deal with a situation in which they’re having a loss, making sure they’re getting the right care from the healthcare staff they have now. Then we work with a larger team—with Rabbi Koenig, and Mrs. Gruenwald, and Mrs. Moskowitz—to make sure that going forward, if need be, they’re seeing the right doctor. The emotional support is often just talking on the phone, but it also includes support during delivery: We train doulas to be with couples who are unfortunately giving birth to babies who will be either born still or born with a medical condition that’s not compatible with life. We do educational events to raise awareness and to empower couples to make the decisions for themselves. The physical support comes from our HUG comfort packets, which we ship all over the world. When a couple gets it they feel like they got a hug, like someone cares about them. It
contains chocolate, slippers, candles, a coloring book specially-made for us, and emotionally supportive reading material.
3
You’ve been running the HUG program for 3 years now. Have there been any new developments since you took charge?
Since I took it over, we’ve been increasing our focus on support during delivery and raising awareness about infertility by running more doula trainings and more community events.
4
Can you give us a few examples of support you’ve offered couples?
I’ll tell you about five of the calls I had this week. One was a woman in London, who wanted to make sure that she was getting the best medical guidance for her situation. Next was someone who’s struggling through a loss and just needed to talk. Later that day, we had someone who’s experiencing recurrent pregnancy loss and wanted us to take a look at her test results. I also had someone who is unfortunately delivering a stillborn baby; we had to send a doula to be with them. The last case was a couple who had delivered a stillborn baby a year ago and was now, BH, expecting. There were some complications, and we got in touch with their doctor. BH, through our intervention, they had a healthy baby boy last night.
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Swiss Serenity T H E A L P S B EC KON F ROM AFAR‌
Switzerland Alpine Summer Vacation: Relax in the Kempinski Grand Hotel at St. Moritz for 10 days. Prize includes: 2 airline tickets, gourmet food, and accommodations. This prize is sponsored lezchus our sister-in-law that she should be zoche to have a healthy baby.
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This prize is sponsored with profound hakaras hatov to הקב”ה, and in the zechus that all who need a yeshua see one immediately
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לע”נ יוטא בת ר’ זלמן מרדכי ע”ה ולע”נ חי’ לאה בת ר’ אהרן הכהן ע”ה ולע”נ מאשא בת ר’ שאול חבל ע”ה ולע”נ רבקה בת ר’ אברהם ע”ה
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Sponsored by Dovid and Hindy Harrison Lezchus our dear parents, to whom we are eternally grateful, and our beloved children
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HOTEL FOR
SHABBOS I want to share an experience I had recently, when I was forced to spend Shabbos in a Manhattan hotel. I checked in about a half-hour before Shabbos and was told about a package waiting for me at the front desk. A quick glance told me that, as I suspected, the package wasn’t for me. It contained two large, pretty boxes and a magnificent bouquet of flowers, with the A TIME logo showing that it came from you. Much later, when I saw a frum couple approaching the check-in desk, I realized who the true recipients were. It was so heartwarming to see their elation at being treated like true VIP’s, somewhat easing the pain of a lonely Shabbos far from home. Physically, they were on their own, but I knew that A TIME was with them on their difficult journey. I couldn’t resist sharing what I saw that Shabbos. Though I always knew about your remarkable work, seeing it in action took it to the next level. This is not something that could be described in a fundraising booklet or digital campaign. There was no fanfare or publicity, but for that couple in Manhattan, you made all the difference. May Hashem bless your work with tremendous siyata dishmaya.
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A
$ 3 6 F amily
Split to Cool I T ’S S UP ER- QUI ET AN D S UP ER- COOL !
Efficient and ultra-quiet split-unit air conditioning, with separate thermostats for each unit. Includes: 6 units
Mountain Air HVAC 718 954-0139
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Sponsored by Mr and Mrs Brian Gurtman
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$ 3 6 F amily
Pesach Chef C O O K FOR YOM TOV I N STYLE!
Professionally designed and installed Pesach kitchen including granite countertops, wood cabinetry, and GE stove. Value: $8,000
This prize is sponsored by a dear friend of ATIME as a zechus for their children
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Silver Stations GI LD EACH YOM TOV WIT H GLAMOUR!
Silver sensations around the year: Rosh Hashana Honey Dish, Sukkos Esrog Box, Pesach Kos Shel Eliyahu, and Shavuos Flower Vase. Grand Silver Boro Park: 4921 13th Ave. | 718-854-0623 Flatbush: 1207 Ave J. | 718-758-3888
Grand Sterling Co. Grand Sterling Co.
INC
INC
Sponsored by Dovid and Sarala Lefkowitz Baltimore, MD In honor of Rabbi and Mrs Shaul Rosen, we treasure your friendship, our nachas is your nachas
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This prize is sponsored by a supporter L’zchus for a shidduch
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Castle Retreat ROLL OUT TH E RED C ARPET !
Shabbos for 20 guests at Higlands Castle includes 2-night stay. Explore the magnificent palace, set amidst the Adirondack Mountains and overlooking Lake George.
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$ 3 6 F amily
Finely Furnished CREATE D REAM S OF TRUE ELEGANC E.
Beautiful master bedroom furniture of your choice, up to $8,100.
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Sponsored by Stage Presence
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$ 3 6 F amily
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Teardrop Exploit R OU G H I N G I T H AS N EV ER BEEN S UCH F UN !
Lightweight Teardrop camper trailer includes sleeping space for 2 adults and basic kitchen, for the ultimate camping experience. Sponsored by Anita and Elliot Friedman
לע”נ ר’ אלימלך בן ר’ משה ורבקה בת ר’ אליהו ע”ה and in honor of all our grandchildren
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What to say (and not to say) to someone living with infertility You know someone who’s been waiting for a long time to have a baby. They’re struggling, and you’d like to reach out. Here’s what Mrs. Vivienne Moskowitz, medical consultant for ATIME, says you should (and shouldn’t) do.
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Something one person finds helpful and supportive will be hurtful and damaging to another. To figure out what to say to someone, says Mrs. Moskowitz, you should know them and be willing to feel them out. If you’re close with this person, the best possible thing you can do is become a safe space for them. Mrs. Moskowitz says that’s what her mother did for her. She was available. She listened. She never probed, asking how an appointment or test went or asking follow-up questions when Mrs. Moskowitz shared updates. She waited for her daughter to share. She listened and offered only support, using words that worked for them: “I hope everything goes well at the doctor,” “You shared you might be doing a procedure, I’m thinking about you.” Other good practices include supporting their decisions, whatever they are, and continuing to talk about unrelated topics that you’d normally discuss (work, what’s going on in the world). FIRST, KNOW THAT EVERYONE RESPONDS DIFFERENTLY TO EMOTIONAL PAIN:
Treat it like any other loss. Offer nonjudgmental support, never saying what they should have done, or what they could or should do next time. “I was so, so sorry to hear about your loss. I wish I had the right words to say. I’m here for you. You can share anything with me or not share anything with me. If you want me to sit here and keep my mouth shut, I will.” IF A FRIEND OR LOVED ONE EXPERIENCES PREGNANCY LOSS:
When it’s time to share the news, share it with them, sensitively. Tell the couple experiencing infertility before you tell others. Call them on the phone so they can process the news in private. You can say, “I’m ready to share wonderful news with the family but I wanted to share it with you first.” IF YOU FIND OUT YOU OR A FAMILY MEMBER IS EXPECTING A SIMCHA:
In all circumstances, be mindful of the effect of your words. Steer clear of statements that are not genuine. In case of pregnancy, this includes “You’re next,” “I wish it was you,” and “I’m sorry they’re expecting.” Be careful not to minimize their pain or to suggest you know better than they do. If it could start with “At least…”, it’s telling them they don’t deserve to be feeling their pain (“At least you have a good spouse/job”; “At least you didn’t have to do seven loads of laundry before coming to this wedding”; “At least you have a child already”; etc.). Beware of “Just” or “Have you tried” statements that imply couples are doing it wrong (“Just do treatment, it worked for Malky”; “Just lose 30lb”; “Have you tried/seen this study?”). This is a difficult time for you, too: for perhaps the first time in your child’s life, you can’t take what’s wrong and make it better. ATIME has a support group for you, too. FINALLY, IF YOU’RE A PARENT OF A CHILD EXPERIENCING INFERTILITY:
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Airbnb Adventures F UN I S N ’ T J UST FOR KIDS…IS IT ?
Airbnb vacation of your choice, nearby or in exotic locations. Spend up to $4,000.
Sponsored by the Hoffman Family
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Sponsored by Yitzchok Arye Hollander
לע”נ ר’ ברוך בן ר’ אברהם עביר ע”ה ,רויזא בת ר’ מאיר זאב ,וסימא בת ר’ שמעון חנני’ ע”ה
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Master Mattress THE KEY TO D EEP S LEEP AN D S W EET D REAM S …
The Casper Wave Hybrid 13” memory and latex foam, inner-spring coil mattress boasts ergonomic zones and gel pads to relieve back pain. Prize includes 2 mattresses.
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Appliance Profile BUI LD YOUR P ROF I LE ON GE P ROFILE!
GE Profile Stainless Steel Appliances. Prize includes: French-door refrigerator, gas range, over-the-range microwave. Plug-ins Appliances 4103 13th Avenue, 718-853-6061
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VIP View F R ON T- R OW S EATS AN D F I RSTC L A S S EN T E R TAI N M EN T!
VIP tickets for the entire family at the next event of Jewish entertainment of your choice. Prize Dedicated by Allison and Isaac Levy In Memory of Yvonne Katz
סבא בת בדיה
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Orlando Villa TREAT YOUR FAMILY TO A F UN - F I LLED AD VENT URE!
Orlando family trip. Prize includes: Tickets for entire family and a villa with a private pool. This prize is sponsored in honor of Rabbi Chaim Aharon Ungar and Mrs Yides Grunwald and all the ATIME couples
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$ 2 6 F amily
Spa Unlimited R E LA X I N YOUR S PACE AT YOUR PACE!
Install an in-home sauna for the ultimate stress-free retreat at your convenience.
Prize sponsored by
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Yanky Speaks: It was a hectic morning but we actually made it here five minutes early! And it’s a good thing we did, because we were held up at the door by the security guard who grilled us so thoroughly that I was beginning to doubt my own identity. “Ma’am, go ahead,” he finally said, motioning to Chaya Leah. “You can enter. Take the elevator to the fifth floor.” I matter-of-factly followed my wife across the carpeted threshold, to be stopped in my tracks by that same nasal voice. “Sir, no one aside from the patient is permitted to enter.” My shock was strong enough to coax another few words from the taciturn guard. “COVID, you know.” Yeah, I know. Covid, covid, and once again covid. “So…I’m meant to wait…uh, where exactly?” I asked, as diplomatically as possible with a burly guard towering over me and breathing into my face. He shrugged, and pointed haphazardly to the great big outdoors. “Take your pick, man. The parking lot is definitely big enough.” That was it. Chana Leah walked to the bank of elevators, looking back once or 578 1
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twice to verify that she was actually being forced to face this procedure alone. I walked out to the unwelcoming parking lot, calculating how many hours I would be forced to pace the pavement while our hopes and dreams were put to the test in one of the hospital’s operating rooms. Our quiet, quiet house was now replaced with the absolute silence of an empty lot, and I fought the desperation that reached out to grab hold of me. “I’ll get through Sefer Tehillim at least twice,” I figured, leaning against the hood of my beat-up jalopy. “And I even get to daven in complete privacy, without others in the waiting room looking over my shoulder.”
Dovid Speaks: What a morning! After our late start and our last-minute stop for important documents, we were stalled in a monumental traffic jam that turned a deaf ear to my desperate pleas. But once that cleared up, I drove down the highway like one possessed. We had to reach the hospital on time, today of all days! This procedure had been scheduled way in advance, and with the COVID uncertainties wreaking havoc on all our plans, we couldn’t afford to lose this slot. I bit my lip. Mimi was sitting stiffly in the passenger seat, as if the slightest smile or movement would shatter our dreams into millions of shards. This was it. The big day which would 84
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hopefully grant us some clarity in this muddling, befuddling quest for that which everyone around us takes for granted. We were both too tense to speak, but we were in this together. I pulled into the huge parking lot with seconds to spare and we set off at a rapid clip to the entranceway. A towering, broad-shouldered security guard stopped us in our tracks. Boy, was he thorough! I was even tempted to offer my parents’ birthdates and favorite ice cream colors, but his serious mien kept me at my best behavior. “Ma’am, go ahead,” he intoned, with the bored voice of one who has said the same words dozens of times. “You can enter. Take the elevator to the fifth floor.” I followed Mimi through the sliding doors, only to be stopped by this mountain of a man. “Sir, no one aside from the patient is permitted to enter,” he said. “COVID regulations.” Whew. Talk about a shocker from left field! I looked at the grand parking lot cum waiting room. I looked at my watch. I glared at the guard. And then, without much choice, I waved to Mimi as she bravely headed up to the operating rooms on her own. This was it. I was on my own for the next few hours, with nothing but my Sefer Tehillim for company. Which was exactly as it should be, wasn’t it?
Yanky Speaks: I feel…invaded. There’s a familiar-looking avreich wandering about in my private waiting room and I wish I could hide. Will the ground be kind enough to swallow me up until he leaves? Or maybe I should crouch in the back seat of my old car for the next few hours?
Dovid Speaks: Hey, look at that! I thought I’m on my own but there’s someone else here, doing the same thing as me. He’s looking at
the ground so I don’t think he’s noticed me yet. Might as well introduce myself, seeing as we’ll be sharing this space for the next long while.
Yanky Speaks: Noooo. He’s approaching with a great big friendly smile. I can’t do this. This procedure is a secret from my parents, my siblings, my in-laws and – well, everybody. Yet this yungerman, whom I think I’ve noticed once or twice in Beis Medrash Gavoha where I learn, is in on the secret. Ouch.
“Hi,” Dovid said jovially,
extending his hand to the unnamed but slightly familiar yungerman leaning on a beat-up old jalopy.
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“Nice car you got here,”
he said finally, poking his thumb at the rusted metal and smashed fender.
Dovid Speaks: I know that man! I’ve seen him in yeshiva. I’m sure of it! We’re obviously not in the same chaburah or anything, but I know that he learns in BMG too. Wow. What a small world! I’m so glad I’ve got someone here to help me pass the time. Hashem sure takes care of me, down to the last detail! “Hi,” Dovid said jovially, extending his hand to the unnamed but slightly familiar yungerman leaning on a beat-up old jalopy. “I’m Dovid K. from Lakewood.” Yanky offered a limp handshake in return, accompanied by a penetrating silence.
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“And you are?” Dovid tried to help him along. “Also from Lakewood, I presume, because you look somewhat familiar.” “Y-yes,” Yanky admitted, seeing that the game was up. “I’m Yanky R. and I’ve seen you in BMG. I think.” Dovid nodded enthusiastically. This was geshmack! What were the odds of meeting someone who could share his pain; his fears; his hopes specifically when he needed the support so desperately? Yanky chewed his fingernails pensively. This was not in the plan. It was bad enough being banished to never-never land outside the hospital premises – but to be banished there with company?! And specifically someone who knew him
and understood him all too well?! It was a nightmare…but no one was offering him the opportunity to wake up and make his escape. Dovid leaned companionably on the old jalopy, imitating Yanky’s stance. The silence was grating on his nerves and he wasn’t one to let silence get him down. “Nice car you got here,” he said finally, poking his thumb at the rusted metal and smashed fender. His comment, so off-the-mark and obviously born of desperation, quivered in the air for a long and incredulous moment. Yanky caved first. His laughter rang out in the empty parking-lot as he pounded his fists on the forgiving metal. “Right!” he finally managed, between spurts of laughter. “Nice car!” Dovid, thrilled with the success of his overtures, was quick to join. He admired the smashed fender and missing door-handles. He ran his fingers over the crack in the windshield. And then, with mock seriousness, he led the way to his own showpiece. “And now, sir, if you wish,” he said pompously, bowing with exaggerated politeness. “I’ve scheduled an open viewing for VIP’s today. My car, at its very best.” His grand sweeping gesture encompassed a small, compact car that had seen better days. “It’s miniature,” Yanky commented and Dovid’s eyelids fluttered in response. “No need for anything bigger at the moment,” he said, way too quickly. “Yeah, I know,” Yanky breathed, and
those three words said it all. It spoke of silence and desperation and crushed, shriveled hope. It spoke of dreams, gently nurtured and just as gently laid to rest. It spoke of stares and questions and pitying glances. It spoke of months that became years and then inched toward a decade. They had hours ahead of them, but suddenly the prospect didn’t seem daunting or draining in the least. By the time the two little cars merged into New Jersey bound traffic with the sun setting magnificently in the west, their burdens were that much lighter for being shared. Take a peek into BMG during the morning hours, and you’ll see that bond blossoming in the seas of Torah. Dovid and Yanky have formed a new chavrusah-shaft that traces its roots back to that deserted parking lot near a sprawling hospital campus. Dovid sometimes falls silent, uncharacteristically so, but Yanky finds the words to draw him back into the land of the living. “Hashem is greater than the doctors and their diagnoses,” he reminds his friend. “Their pessimism has no bearing on Hashem’s plans!” And when Yanky inevitably withdraws, wallowing in his pain and disappointment, Dovid slaps him on the back with a jovial warning. “Smile, Yanky,” he cajoles. “Even if it’s just pretend. Otherwise, I’ll drag you back to that parking lot and get the security guard on your case!”
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$ 3 6 W omen
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You’re a Bestseller! ST EP I N TO THE S H OES OF A P U BLI S HED AUTHOR!
Get your novel or family memoir printed. Prize includes final copyediting and proofreading, and 500 hard-cover copies.
Dedicated by Dr and Mrs Michael Muschel
לע”נ ר’ נחום בן ר’ מאיר ע”ה ושרה בת ר’ יחיאל מיכאל ע”ה והרב ישראל יצחק בן הרב בנימין הלוי ע”ה ושרה פעסיל בת ר’ אריה לייב ע”ה
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Hotel at Home GET THE BEST O F BOT H WORLDS, GRAT IS!
Pesach at home, hassle-free! Get your home cleaned & kashered, all food cooked by professionals in your kitchen. Includes: food, matzos, and wine for family of 10. This prize is sponsored by Avri and Mirra Gross
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$ 3 6 W omen
Think Mink EX Q U I S I T E LY P LUS H AN D D E LI C I S O U LY WARM .
Beautiful Mink Coat, valued at $8,200. This prize is sponsored by Dovie and Yehudis Minzer
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Luminous Leichter GREET TH E S H ABBOS QUEEN I N S P LEN D OR.
Dazzling silver Leichter at Grand Sterling. Value: $8,200
Grand Sterling Co. Grand Sterling Co.
INC
INC
Boro Park: 4921 13th Ave. | 718-854-0623 Flatbush: 1207 Ave J. | 718-758-3888
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What a Gem! N O P RI CE TAGS AT TACH ED !
A jewelry piece of your choice at Kaufman’s Design Jewelry, up to $8,100. Kaufmans Design Jewelry 5023 16th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 718-871-3575
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Mall Madness A M E R I C A ’S L A R G EST M ALL BECKON S !
The Mall of America in Bloomington, Minnesota boasts 520+ stores spread over nearly 5 million square feet. Prize includes: 2 tickets and $6,500 to spend
Prize Dedicated
לע”נ ר’ שלמה בן הרב יהודה אריה ע”ה
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Women $26 578 1
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Dedicated by Lynn and Joel Mael
לזכות רפואה שלמה לחיים יהושע בן הענדיל
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$ 2 6 W omen
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Florida Fling R A I S E T H E B AR ON YOUR VAC AT I ON STAN D ARD S .
Spend your Florida vacation at the luxurious Fountainebleau Miami Beach Hotel. Prize includes: 2 round-trip tickets, 4-night stay, $1000 for expenses.
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Closet Challenge G ET R I D OF THE M ES S , P RON TO!
Transform your home with dream closets! Closet Maven will design and build the perfect closet systems up to $4,000. Prize Dedicated לע"נ ברכה בת ר' שרגא ע"ה
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Allegra Fine Jewelry Brooklyn: 1548 44th St, 718-853-8253 Lakewood: 732-942-3000
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Allegra Allure A DA Z Z L I N G C HOI CE OF EN D L E S S P OS S I BI LI TY.
Jewelry of your choice from Allegra Fine Jewelry’s selection of classic and contemporary Jewels. Value: $4,000
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Shop Local CLOS E TO H OME AND CLOS E AT H EART…
Fill your closets while supporting local shop-owners. Spend $3,800 at heimishe clothing stores in your city.
Photo by Eli Wohl
וחי אחיך עמך This prize is sponsored L'zchus all the couples yearning for a child
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BK Charm CUT AN D STYLED JUST FOR YOU!
Custom Sheitel by BK Wigs, including cut. Value: $4,200
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Mega Massage TA K E A S E AT AN D R- E- L- A-X!
Zero Gravity Full-Body Massage Chair. Enjoy the benefits of massage in the comfort of your home.
Sponsored by Chesky and Naomi Newman
לע"נ ר' עקיבא מנחם בן ר' אברהם ע"ה
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tears jo SOWING WITH
REAPING WITH
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So, Aaron, how about we start with a short introduction?
oy THE INTERVIEW WITH MR. & MRS. AARON AND EVELYN MANOPLA IS FULL OF LIFE, PASSION, AND A GENEROUS SPRINKLING OF GOOD HUMOR. THEIR WORDS TINKLE WITH VIGOR AND IT’S ALL WE CAN DO TO KEEP PACE WITH THE TWISTS AND TURNS IN THEIR FASCINATING—AND HARROWING—JOURNEY.
Aaron: Well, I’m Aaron Manopla, which you’ve probably figured out from the title on the page. I got married in 2013 and am now the proud father of two beautiful children. Maybe I’m giving out the ending too soon, but I can’t resist sharing that last bit of info.
Let’s start at the beginning, at the time of your marriage. You said it was in 2013, right? Aaron: We were both so young and…well, I’m not sure if the word is innocent or trusting or just plain old clueless. I remember walking away from my chatunah feeling on top of the world, and in my mind’s eye I already saw the beautiful family that was sure to follow. Boys, girls, maybe there would he a set of twins there, too…
The dream of every young couple… Aaron: Right. This was just part of the plan and we were both looking forward to that stage. And it seemed to be going exactly as expected! When we had good news to share less than a year later, we were ecstatic. I remember flying off to Mexico then, for a cousin’s wedding, and the entire trip we were both hugging this special secret to ourselves. It was a heady, dream-filled time.
Something tells me that those dreams didn’t last too long. What happened? Aaron: Everything shattered to pieces when we returned from Mexico. We were totally unprepared for the doctor’s dry pronouncement that…it was over. No more dreams. No 578 1
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more baby. Sitting in that office, on a hard plastic chair, I felt the tears falling even as I tried convincing myself that this is normal and almost par for the course. That’s what the doctor told us. ‘Yeah, don’t worry, it happens all the time. You’ll see, very soon you’ll be able to put it all behind you.’
followed by another one and then another one. It’s amazing that I could say this all in the span of one sentence when in reality this was my life for so many excruciating years. Hope, fear, followed by crushing disappointment. Once. Twice. Three times.
And how did that make you feel?
Aaron: You only heard half of it! We
Aaron: I actually accepted his words very enthusiastically. We so badly wanted to believe that this was just a blip in the screen, a little bump that would soon disappear under piles of baby blankets and waves of childish laughter. And exactly a year and a day later, in April of 2015, it seemed that our life was back on track. Baby Moshe entered the world with a lusty scream, instantly turning us into an Abba and Ima. It was sheer bliss!
suffered a total of six losses. Six little neshamos are waiting for us, up there in Shamayim, and they’re our children. But down here…oh, down here it was hard. So, so hard. After the sixth loss, my wife insisted that we go to Eretz Yisroel to recharge our spiritual and emotional batteries.
You became a family. Aaron: Mmm… Except that I soon realized what an absolute miracle Moshe was. Every baby is a miracle, but this one had the doctors scratching their heads and admitting that ultimately, only Hashem runs the world. I didn’t realize it then, of course. When Moshe was born, I knew that he would be followed by a gaggle of siblings. I pictured him as ‘Big Brother Moshe’, and looked forward to meeting the rest of the crew. But they never came.
That must have been hard. Aaron: Hard? (Chuckles heartily) The word hard doesn’t begin to do it justice. When Moshe was about 18 months old, we suffered another loss, which was
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Wow. What a nisayon.
Great idea. That must have been a very moving and soul-stirring trip. Aaron: Wait, wait – not so fast! After that last loss, we were in contact with Mrs. Friedman from A TIME and she pledged to get us into the famous Dr. Williams as soon as possible. “What does ASAP mean, on Dr. Williams’ terms?” I wanted to know. When we heard that it would be minimally 3 months of waiting for an appointment, we went ahead and booked our tickets on June 2nd for the following week. Well, guess what? Dr. Williams offered us a slot for precisely that day!
Oh, no. You had to cancel your plans? Aaron: Nope! Vivienne Moskowitz pulled some magic strings and we got a call from the doctor’s office with the gracious invitation to ‘Call us when you’re back and we’ll fit you into our schedule’. Oh, what a trip that was! My wife wasn’t
having such an easy time of it, though… Evelyn: Yes, it was really hard in the beginning. I felt shattered and punished and I just couldn’t connect to Hashem! This was so unlike me. It was as if I had lost my inner core; my connection to Hashem! I went to the Kotel and…nothing. It felt so wrong to stand there with my siddur while inside…there was just an arid desert. So I called Mrs. Friedman, hoping she would have a magic wand to make it all go away.
we poured out our hearts and bared our souls. We came home, recharged and ready to face anything life would throw at us. And that’s when you finally went to Dr. Williams, correct?
Aaron: Okay, now listen to this. I was through with doctors and their all-knowing diagnoses. They all hmmpphed and harrumphed and then came out saying the same thing: “Sorry, RIGHT, MAMME we don’t see any problem. Aaron: Well, her suggesThere’s no medical explaRACHEL. SHE ALSO tion really was like that nation for your recurrent magic wand… WAITED AND CRIED FOR losses.” Evelyn: Mrs. Friedman So, I prepared myself CHILDREN. SHE KNOWS told me, “Go to Mamme a neat little speech to tell WHAT IT MEANS TO Rochel! Yes, to Kever Dr. Williams. I’ll spare Rochel! You’ll see, everyWANT SOMETHING you the rhetoric, but the thing will come back to gist of it was that I am SO, SO MUCH… ONLY life.” simply not interested in TO SEE IT SLIP OUT OF And I thought, Right, hearing his opinion since Mamme Rachel. She also it won’t help us anyYOUR GRASP... waited and cried for children. way, and that this is how She knows what it means to Hashem planned our life want something so, so much… so we’ll just accept it and only to see it slip out of your grasp. Aaron learn to deal with it. drove me to Kever Rachel, and…what Whew. Sounds heavy. should I say? It was as if I had been reborn. I stood there, near our Mamme who had Aaron: Yeah, I had it all planned out and suffered so much, and I felt all the layers was even looking forward to putting it being peeled away. I got in touch with my out there for this doctor to gape at. But… pain and that allowed the hope and tefillah he never gave me the chance. You know, to finally resurface. Yeshuat Hashem really comes in the blink Aaron: Of course, we went to many different places in Eretz Yisroel. We got berachot from so many gedolim. Rav Gamliel Rabinovich, Rav Dovid Abuchatzeira – Evelyn: Rebetzin Kolodetsky – Aaron: Right. And all the kevarim where
of an eye. Dr. Williams looked through our thick medical files and then nonchalantly said, “You weren’t tested for everything yet. I’d like to run several additional tests.” I was floored. 578 1
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And when the results came back pointing to an issue that could be addressed, I was shocked beyond words. We’ve gotten so caught up in the details of the story, that I lost track of the timeline. When did all this happen? Aaron: We met Dr. Williams in July of 2019. And…the following year our hopes and dreams started taking shape. We were afraid to think. Afraid to imagine. The piercing, crushing pain of disappointment does not dull with repetition – quite the opposite, in fact. But as time went on, we allowed ourselves to think that maybe, just maybe, Moshe would finally have a little brother or sister. Corona hit New York in March – I don’t have to remind you of that, do I?
No, not quite. But it’s amazing how the pandemic affected every person in a different way. You were just one family, quarantined and sequestered at home, and look at the story that preceded the COVID era! Aaron: It was so bashert, just remarkable. The lockdown went into effect after our last appointment with Dr. Williams! “Go to a regular doctor,” he smilingly told us. “My job is done.” Just a week later we realized that even if we would have wanted to continue seeing Dr. Williams in Manhattan, it would’ve been impossible. His office, like so many others, had become inaccessible.
Wow. You actually made it to the other side. Aaron: Hold on. You’re jumping ahead of the game! Everything was going great
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Fortune Manopla
but - get ready for the stomach-churning drop! – in June, we were told there were some complications that might put all our dreams at risk. Oh, did I fall apart! My entire world collapsed around me. I started researching the chances of a preemie born this early, and – what should I say? No one had anything encouraging to offer. That Sunday night, reality suddenly hit me over the head and I thought, “What is wrong with you, Aaron?! Hashem is talking to you and telling you that you must daven – and daven well!” My Maariv tefillah that night was like nothing I had ever experienced. I literally talked to Hashem. “I got it!” my heart screamed out. “Hashem, I got the message. I’m happy – really happy – with the life You’ve given me. If this is my destiny, to be blessed
with just one son Moshe – then I accept it! Fully and truly! I’m good with it. But…But Hashem! What about my irreligious relatives? They’ll look at us and say Zu Torah v’Zu Secharah?! Is this the reward for living a frum life?! Hashem, for Your sake, bless us with a healthy child who will make a Kiddush Hashem when he or she is born!” Powerful stuff. Aaron: I felt so close to Hashem that night. I walked home from shul and told my wife, “Don’t worry, everything will be fine.” (Laughs.) She thought I had lost my marbles. Everything was so not fine at that point, but I really and truly felt that Hashem was carrying us. I wasn’t in the slightest bit surprised when we went back to the doctor the next day, Monday morning, and the doctor told us, “What’s the whole commotion? Everything looks fine. Go home.”
Seriously?! That is remarkable! A nes! Aaron: The story doesn’t end there! The very next day, I got an email from ATIME telling me that it’s the very last chance to buy tickets for Split-the-Pot, with a guaranteed total of $100,000. I made a quick cheshbon. If I get half of that amount, I’ll have a neat $50K from which I’ll take off maaser and chomesh, 10K for tzedakah. “Not bad, Aaron,” I told myself. “You’ll figure out what to do with $40,000, right?” But before I bought a ticket, I took it
one step further. I promised that if I win, I’ll give back $25K to ATIME. That would leave me with a tidy sum of $25,000. I don’t believe it! I knew your name sounds familiar! You were the winner of last year’s Split the Pot! Aaron: Precisely! The next day I got a call from ATIME telling me that I had won! I was blown away! Now, listen to this! I had promised to give 25K back to ATIME, right? I did that…but this time around, this very year, the pot had grown much larger than usual, to $130,000 – giving me $65,000 instead of the 50K I thought I’d be getting. Figure it out, my friend! I took 25K and gave it back to A TIME, and stayed with that same 40K I would have gotten without the promise! Fascinating, huh?
What a story! But we haven’t reached the climax, Aaron. Don’t leave us in suspense here… Aaron: (Laughs) It was September again, the same time of year when we had suffered a majority of our losses. This September was different. Little Fortune, our precious little princess of a daughter, entered the world and Moshe finally became the Big Brother I had always dreamed he would be. To you, it sounds like a story, but for me this is my life! There’s a gorgeous baby, born just a few months ago, who can sometimes scream the house down – much to my delight. I look at her – and I see Hashem’s Hand in every fingernail, on every miniscule eyelash. We are blessed, and I am so glad to share that blessing in this forum, where others can draw chizuk and inspiration from our story.
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Mommy! Can you do that again Now that I’m grown? Hashem, Yehudis is working so hard To be happy For her friends And sisters, and sister-in-laws, and neighbors And co-workers and cousins and then sisters again Who were chosen To be the Mommies Even though She’s waiting so anxiously To be a Mommy herself. We are so proud! And then Mommy, Do you think that soon It will finally be My turn?
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Hello, there. It’s Peninah speaking from an alternate universe. At least, that’s what it feels like to me, though to most of you this place is hopefully quite familiar and even – dare I say – comfortable.
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I’m dressed in white, from my white peaked cap, all along my white lab coat, down to the white fluffy netty thingies they make me put on over my fairly presentable walking shoes. So much for fashion! What gives? Before you start making wild guesses, I’ll give you one of my own. It will raise eyebrows. It will summon several good tongue-clucks and even pitying shakes of the head. I can even hear your comments – not to me, of course. You’re way too genteel and polite for that. But I can’t say I blame you for sharing these brilliant remarks with your family, friends, 1 5 6 7 1 8 -WI N -1 2 3 4
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neighbors, and anyone else blessed with two ears and a feeling heart. “You heard? Poor Peninah, she’s really gone off the deep end this time.” (This comment I let pass. It’s not totally off the mark.) “You can’t blame her. I mean, it’s been 12 years already. Twelve years! That’s a l-o-o-n-g time to wait around for life to start!” (But this comment doesn’t deserve a response. I mean, does anyone out there really think that I’ve lost track of passing time? Don’t you realize that a year for you is like 12 excruciating, shattering years for me?) Anyway, I’ll spare you the suspense. I
DEAR LITTLE BLUE BABY IN THE FAR-RIGHT CORNER, DON’T CRY, PRECIOUS ONE. YOUR FACE IS SO MUCH CUTER WHEN YOU’RE CALM...
hereby invite you to come join me on my secret mission to Shaarei Tzedek Hospital. It’s secret, because if my mother finds out she might just commit me somewhere. And it’s a mission, because there’s a magical nursery full of little beings who are just counting the seconds for me to arrive. (Fine, if they’d be able to count, but let’s not get nitty-gritty about this.) Yes, you got the picture. Poor, poor Peninah who is married for 12 and a half years and her house is as silent as the day of her chuppah – yes, poor Peninah couldn’t think of a better place to volunteer than in the hospital nursery. She insists on hurting herself, time and time
again, by handling and cooing to babies not her own. Ridiculous, right? Say what you want. For me, this is bliss. For five hours every day, I am Mommy Peninah, the mother of at least ten babies (depending how many the head-nurse entrusts to my care). Could you imagine? It’s sheer delight. There’s a slight problem. Most of them leave my care without telling me their names (it’s still a secret when they’re discharged) so I’m forced to talk about my lovely little ones in – ah, let’s just say different terms. Here’s a peek at a regular day in the life of Peninah, Mom to All: Dear Little Blue Baby in the Far-Right Corner, Don’t cry, precious one. Your face is so much cuter when you’re calm. I’m telling you. I snatched a glance when you thought no one was looking, and I got to see that most adorable dimple on your left cheek. I saw a twitch of your miniature eyebrows that told me all about your quirky sense of humor. So don’t play hard to get, Little Blue Baby, okay? Love, Peninah We forged a good connection, Little Blue Baby and I. I rocked him and sang to him until he agreed to show off his dimple again. I cuddled him as close as I dared and for some reason, that delicious hug just made me cry. Until his mother appeared at the nursery door and nearly had a panic attack when she spotted his empty bassinet. “My baby!” she cried, clawing at her throat. “Where is he?! What happened?!” I rushed over, wiping my tears with one hand and stroking Little Blue Baby’s back with the other. 578 1
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“He’s right here,” I told his mother. “Beautiful and calm as ever. I was just getting him ready for you.” I swallowed. I swaddled that tiny little being and handed him over to his mother. I smiled. I think I said something about his dimple. And then I closed the door behind the Little Blue Baby’s Mommy and cried for all I was worth. The staff is used to my crying jags. They say it’s my secret to success with these fussy little beings. Dear Pink Princess, Why? Why do you turn your head away from me and cry to the walls of your impersonal bassinet? Do you sense, somewhere in your pretty little head, that I’m not the real deal? That I’m just pretending to belong here? Do you see through my little act and reserve all your affection for those who are real Mommies? It hurts, little Pink Princess. It really, really hurts. And then there’s this handsome prince in the center of the nursery. He’s so placid and so well-behaved, exactly like my baby will be one day. Dear Prince, You look like me, a little. And when you close your eyes, you look like my husband Menachem. You know, if I ignore all the other details about you, I could imagine – for real! – that you’re mine and that we’re going to waltz off into the sunset soon. I daren’t say that aloud. They would fire me on grounds of a security hazard – and I think they might even be justified. But just this minute, could you help me pretend? And then, Little Blue Baby goes home. Pink Princess goes home. Even Prince goes home. 1 5 8 7 1 8 -WI N -1 2 3 4
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I watch their Mommies and Totties picking them up, ever so gingerly, and slipping tiny limbs into tiny sleeves, and that’s when the tears come. I excuse myself. The staff members share glances that they think I don’t see. The mothers seem uncomfortable. But…I can’t stand here and watch this spectacle. They’re going home with their gorgeous, precious bundles. Come 2:00 and I’ll also go home, with only a bundle of memories to sustain me through the long, hard days. “Don’t go,” Menachem begs. “Look what it does to you! I’ll find you another
DEAR PINK PRINCESS, WHY? WHY DO YOU TURN YOUR HEAD AWAY FROM ME AND CRY TO THE WALLS OF YOUR IMPERSONAL BASSINET?
volunteering job. I’ll get you different occupations. You’ll become a – a – chef or a waitress or a seamstress.” My tears are quick and violent. “You know I hate to cook!” I sob. “And if you give me a sewing machine, I’ll just sew myself to the chair! I need to do this. It’s good for me!” Menachem looks doubtful. He’s seen me coming home in tears too often to fall for my allegations. But I know – I really, really know – that this is what I need to do. It gives my dreams a shape; it gives my hopes a place to thrive. So you’re invited to join the ranks of
those who think that Peninah has gone off the deep end. I don’t blame you. I would probably say the same thing if our roles were reversed. But I’m big enough to step out of the box that society has set up for me. I’ve been around the block once or twice and I know that for me, the nursery at Shaarei Tzedek is home. Sometimes painful, sometimes piercing, but always – always – full of promise. The promise of new life. Next time you bump into white-clad me, just wave and smile. I’m off to my very own, personalized dreamland.
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Package includes: Rebecca Doll, Book & Accessories, Bed & Bedding, Winter Coat, Summer Outfit, Chanukah Set, School Set, Bedtime Set. Sponsored by a dear friend of ATIME from Teaneck, NJ
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Custom Costumes Outfit the family in magnificent Purim costumes, with a custom theme. Sponsored by Daniel and Penina Schoenbrun
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A Special Thank You!
Rabbi Shaul Rosen Founder & CEO
Mr. Moshe Fischer President
Mr. Yanky Waxler Administrator
Executive Board of Trustees: Avrumie Ausch Moshe Blum Yechiel Eisenstadt Avrum Grunhut Rabbi Naftuli Weiss
ATIME Around the World A TIME USA BORO PARK Brany Rosen
WILLIAMSBURG Rabbi Chaim Aron Unger
Director of Member Services
Satmar South 8 Williamsburg ATIME Rabbinical Director
Rabbi Mordechai Koenig Director of Medical Affairs
Rabbi Yosef Moshe Heilpern
Honorary Board Members 5781: Moshe Danzger
Chanani Seliger
Yoni Danzger
Schneur Stefansky
Mutty Ebstein Neal Einhorn Ikey Fallas
Shai Stern Dovid Sukenik
Solomon Franco Carey Sutton Mark Friedman Aron Tessler
Director of Supervision
Rabbi Chaim Weichman Director of Development
Chumi Friedman Hug Director
Vivienne Moskowitz
Miriam Fishoff
Boruch Webster
Dina Friedrich
Chesky Webster
Contribution Coordinator
Shmuel Fuchs
Moshe Webster
Faigy Augenstein
Shmuli Goldstone
Aaron Manopla
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Rochie Cynamon
Yoichi Herzog
Avraham Moshe Wolfson
Avrumi Hirsch
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Shabse Fuchs
Yehuda Tzvi Rotberg
Medical Referrals
Malky Segedin
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Simcha Miller
Simi Hershko
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Yoel Tyrnauer
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Medical Referrals
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Shmuli Friedman
Eliyahu Langer
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CROWN HEIGHTS Ethel Hurwitz Yehudice Bialestock Sima Simmonds LAKEWOOD Brany Rosen Director of Member Services
Brocha Rivka Fishman Shaina Berger Rabbi Moshie Kaufman Rabbi Meir Bertram Rivky Bertram LSW Sarala Klein Ruchie Rosenfeld ILLC Libby Klein LSW
Rabbi Shmuel Meir Katz Suri Perl Moshie and Leah Webster Yehuda and Elisheva Rotberg UPSTATE Ruchie Leifer Leah Eisenberg CHICAGO Sara Reiffer Esti Blisko Sirky Ehrman Simcha Kamanettzky Sarala Rajchenbach Devora Soroka Chani Chase Tzippy Cohen LCPC MIDATLANTIC Mr. Dovid Lefkowitz Sarala Lefkowitz FLORIDA Emily Levine Jackie Horowitz
ATIME International ISRAEL Mrs. C. Wachsman Director of Member Services
Mrs. Shoshana Mannis Helpline Director
Mrs. Tziri Margulius Events
UK Rabbi Yanky Stern Mrs. Mamela Stern Mrs. Reisy Gitty Buxbaum Mr and Mrs. Moshie and Malkie Munitz
Medical Advisory Board
Affiliated Rabbonim
Samuel D. Bender, M.D. Alan S. Berkeley, M.D. Dr. Bob Berookhim M.D. Michael Bohrer, M.D. Jessica R. Brown, M.D. Peer Dar, M.D. Owen K. Davis, M.D. Tommaso Falcone, M.D. Eric J. Forman, M.D. Dan E. Goldschlag, M.D. Marc Goldstein, M.D. Victor Grazi, M.D. Lawrence Grunfeld, M.D. Joshua M. Hurwitz, M.D. Nachum M. Katlowitz, M.D. David L. Keefe, M.D. Joshua Klein, M.D. Harry J. Lieman, M.D. David Lubell, M.D. Peter McGovern, M.D. Thomas A. Molinaro, M.D. Christine Mullin, M.D. Nicole Noyes, M.D. Steven Palter, M.D. Samantha M. Pfeifer, MD Victor Rosenberg, M.D. Zev Rosenwaks, M.D. Eli Rybak, M.D. Dr. Peter N. Schlegel M.D. FACS Richard T. Scott, M.D. Glenn Schattman, M.D. Lynn L. Simpson, M.D. Michael Silverstein, M.D. Daniel Salzman, M.D. Hugh S. Taylor, M.D. Zev Williams, M.D.
Rabbi Pinchus Breuer Rabbi Shmuel Dishon Rabbi Isaac Dwek Rabbi Eytan Feiner Rabbi Tzvi Flaum Rabbi Zecharyia Gelley Rabbi Dovid Goldwasser Rabbi Moshe Baruch Kaufman Rabbi Shmelke Leifer Rabbi Uren Reich Rabbi Yakov Reisman Rabbi Matisyahu Salomon Rabbi Yosef Veiner Rabbi Ephraim Wachsman Rabbi Herschel Welcher
BELGIUM Rabbi & Mrs Moshie Cik
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HUG: A TIME Pregnancy Loss Support Program Immediate contact with couples who are experiencing or who have experienced a pregnancy loss or stillbirth. Specially trained doulas to be with the couple in the hospital. Arrange with Chevra Kadisha for burials. Support groups and one on one counseling. Compassionate, supportive package for those who experienced the loss of a pregnancy. Mrs. Chumi Friedman Director
Yonina Kaufman, LCSW Clinical Coordinator
MEDICAL CONSULTANTS Dr. Andrei Rebarber, MD Dr. Nathan Fox, MD Dr. Daniel Salzman, MD Oshra Ben-Hai Dr. Victor Grazi, MD Dr. David Lubell, MD Dr. Britt Lunde, MD
Mrs. Bella Hersko, CD Service Coordinator for Grief & Loss
Freidy Liebrow, CD Leah Saltsman, CD Support Consultants
Mrs. Miriam Fishoff Events Coordinator
THERAPY Sara Barris, PHD Norman Blumenthal, PhD Shoshana Karasick, PhD Ruchie Rosenfeild CLC Joy Stimmel,MSW Malky Levine MEDICAL CONSULTANTS Rabbi Mordechai Koenig Rabbi Chaim Aron Unger Mrs. Vivienne Moskowitz HELPLINE MEMBERS Mrs. Devorie Berger Mrs. Bracha Freide Mrs. Brochie Hartman Mrs. Yonina Kaufman Mrs. Chaya Yitty Rottenberg Mrs. Sarah Selengut Mrs. Yocheved Shternbuch
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Mrs. Leah Sprei Mrs. Shaindy Tillim Mrs. Ziona Webster
Mrs. Faigy Cohen Mrs. Malky Cohen Mrs, Chavy Waldman Williamsburg
Mrs. Sarala Lefkowitz
COMFORT DOULAS Zissy Daskal, CD Elka Finkelstein, CD Bella Hersko, CD Fraidy Leibrow, CD
Baltimore
Brooklyn
Mrs. Brochie Hartman Mrs. Esther Moeller Mrs. Rivky Rausman Mrs. Shaindy Moshell
Mrs. Rachel Yaghobian, CD,
Monsey/New Square
Mrs. Ruchy Leifer
Houston, TX
Avigail Cohen, CD Aidy Hoffman, CD Shulamis Kaminetsky, CD Leah Rother, CD
MFMA Mount Sinai
Monroe
Dr. Peer Dar, MD
Mr. Shmuli Friedman
Lakewood
Albert Einstein Medical Center
Five Towns
Yaffa Katz,CD
Dr. Victor Rosenberg, MD
Long Island
Dr. Lynn Simpson,MD Dr. Zev Williams, MD
Mrs. Devorah Fink Mrs. Etty Furst Mrs. Leah Grinberger Mrs. March Schreiber Mrs. Shaindy Tillim Mrs. Perele Weisz
Colombia Presbyterian
Lakewood
Dr. William Schweitzer,MD Dr. Ashley Roman, MD
Mrs. Freidy Liebrow
NYU
Passaic
Northwell Health
Dr. Yaakov Abdelhak, MD Hackensack Medical Center
Dr. Rachel Masch, MD Mount Sinai Beth Israel
Crown Heights
Mrs. Chevie Jacobs Mrs. Shani Schwartz Queens
VOLUNTEERS Mindy Freidman
Mrs. Suri Schwartz
Chevra Kadisha Services – Misaskim
Mrs. Chanie Wachsman Mrs. Tziri Marguluis
Mr. Shalom Kushner
Israel
Boro Park
Tzini Perlmutter
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Esther Bogopulsky, CD Bruchy Mayer, CD Hadassah Levi, CD Rivky Sandel, CD Rivkey Fischer, CD Monsey/Monroe
ATIME Rabbinical Institute of Halacha and Technology The Institute of Halacha and Technology provides complete Rabbinical guidance to all who seek advice and authority on issues pertaining to gynecology, reproductive medicine, high-risk obstetrics and related medical procedures. A team of the most knowledgeable and distinguished Rabbonim have been trained by leading medical professionals to answer questions in halacha involving the most cutting edge advances in modern medicine. Rabbi Binyomin Landau Tosh Boro Park ATIME Rabbinical Institute of Halacha and Technology
Rabbi Herschel Ausch Volkan Williamsburg ATIME Rabbinical Director and Dean ATIME Hashgacha
Rabbi Chaim Aron Unger Satmar South 8 Williamsburg ATIME Rabbinical Director
Rabbi Shmuel Meir Katz Lakewood ATIME Rabbinical Director
Rabbi Shmuel Feurst Agudas Yisroel Chicago ATIME Rabbinical Director
Rabbi Moshe Boruch Kaufman Dayan
LAKEWOOD Rabbi Yossef Greenfeld Rabbi Avrohom Spitzer Rabbi Moshe Zev Feldman Rabbi Chanoch Saltz Rabbi Rephael Szmerla Rabbi Pinchus Wiend
WILLIAMSBURG Rabbi Zisha Ausch Rabbi Leibish Friedman Rabbi Usher Man
MONROE Rabbi Yankel Bergstein Rabbi Yakov Yida Braun Rabbi Shimon Zev Meisels Rabbi Shmiel Eliezer Friedman
BORO PARK Rabbi Yitzchok Bistritsky Rabbi Usher Eckstein Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Ehrenreich Rabbi Yitzchok Zalmen Gips Rabbi Hershal Heilpren Rabbi Burech Lederrich Rabbi Eliezer Sternbuch
MONSEY Rabbi Shimon Katz
CROWN HEIGHTS Rabbi Avrom Bergstein
NEW SQUARE Rabbi Yosef Yisroel Eisenberger
CHICAGO Rabbi Shmuel Fuerst
FLATBUSH Rabbi Benyomin Cohen Rabbi Eliezer Harari Rabbi Eliezer Sholom Heisler
FAR ROCKAWAY Rabbi Binyomin Forst QUEENS Rabbi Hershel Welcher
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ATIME Adoption Services Comprehensive resources for adoption. Some couples, even after going through the process of all of the costly tests and procedures, are still not able to realize their dream of having a child. Mr. & Mrs. Alter & Yettie Katz Mr. & Mrs. Dovid & Shaindel Markowitz
ATIME Help Line Professionally trained volunteers answering all questions regarding infertility, and providing referrals guidance and support to anyone who turns to A TIME for assistance. Rabbi Mordechai Koenig Helpline Director
Mrs. Goldie Blum Mrs. Simi Hersko Mrs. Rivky Lench
Mrs. Mindy Lowy Mrs. Nechumie Lipson Mrs. Elky Miller Mrs. Shoshana Mohadeb Mrs. Vivienne Moskowitz
A TIME Medical Hashgacha Under strict Rabbinical guidance, through the ATIME Hashgocha program we ensure the continuity of Klal Yisroel by providing professionally trained Mashgichim / Mashgichos for all procedures requiring Hashgocha. Rabbi Herschel Ausch Volkan Williamsburg Dean ATIME Hashgacha
Rabbi Mordechai Koenig ATIME Hashgacha Director
Rabbi Yosef Moshe Heilpern Rav Beis Hamedresh Uyvar Boro Park, Director of Supervision
COORDINATORS Mrs. Henny Frankel Mrs. Sury Schwartz Mrs. Brocha Ruttner MASHGICHIM R. Efraim Mordche Friedman Mr. Shimon Koenig Mr. Michael Rothman Rabbi Mendel Shemtov
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MASHGICHOS Mrs. Elana Abadi Mrs. Chavela Adler Mrs. Zlatie Benjaminson Mrs. Deevi Berman Mrs. Hadassah Brown Mrs. Tzirel Cohen Mrs. Chaya Felzenberg Mrs. Faygie Friedman Mrs. Miriam Gerstner Mrs. Zehava Goldenberg Rebitzen Grunwald Mrs. Deena Hadar Mrs. Rivkah Hertz Mrs. Miriam Katz Mrs. Sara Malka Katz Mrs. Debbie Kay Mrs. Dianna Keuossous Mrs. Shoshy Klein Mrs. Freidy Lax
Mrs. Kim Rothstein Mrs. Faigy Schneid Mrs. Esty Unsdorfer Mrs. Noami Zupnik
Mrs. Dina Levin Mrs. Emily Levine Mrs. Frumie Lichtenstein Mrs. Rivka Lindenberg Mrs. Masha Sara Lowenstein Mrs. Nina Majer Mrs. Chevy Mandelbaum Mrs. Frumi Polatsek Mrs. Chavi Rosenberg Mrs. Sharon Rosenhaus Mrs. Penina Rothman Mrs. Chaya Yitty Rottenberg Mrs. Shterni Seligson Mrs. Nina Seigal Mrs. Chany Serebryanski Mrs. Leah Shemtov Mrs. June Silny Mrs. Malky Sperlin Mrs. Sharon Stochel Mrs. Brynde Storch Mrs. Charisse Treisman Mrs. Roizy Ullman Mrs. Devorah Weiss Mrs. Esty Wilschanski Mrs. Adina Winter Mrs. Miriam Wulliger
ATIME Insurance Advocacy On Staff professional representatives fighting rejected insurance claims and providing a resource network for infertility-related insurance coverage. Mr. & Mrs. Aron & Zissy Neustadt
ATIME Singles
R Time
Support and services for singles
Creative Arts and Design classes for our couples.
Ms. Dassy Levine Email: singles1@atime.org
R Time Coordinator
Mrs. Chumie Becker,
Meals With Heart When ordering hashgacha, couples are registered for a gourmet meal delivered to their home for post-retrieval. It’s our way of saying, “We care!” לע”נ ר’ ישעי בן ר’ משה זי”ע מקערעסטיר
Mrs. Henny Frankel
Mrs. Zissy Muller
Chavi Katz
Comfort Food Gourmet meals are prepared for couples at the procedure centers. Mr. and Mrs. Moshe Blum Mr. Yoely Rosenberg
Mr. Shulem Kushner Mr. Greenfeld
Kol Chaya Information! Chizuk! Find it all 24 hours a day whenever you need it by calling Kol Chaya: 718-298-2646 (Yiddish or English) Mr. Yoel Lowy Mr. Avigdor Follman
Mrs. Mindy Lowy Mrs. Leah Schwinder
Shabbos Near Hospital Resources, food, information and hotel rooms, are available for those staying in Manhattan for Shabbos or Courier for Blood Work needed on Shabbos. Mrs. Chaya Kar Mrs. Vivienne Moskowitz Program Coordinators
Mr. Moishe Blum Mrs. Raizy Eigner Mr. Sam Feder Mrs. Tziry Friedman
Mrs. Malky Grunberger Mr. & Mrs. Amrom & Miriam Kass Mr. & Mrs. Kenny & Fagie Koppel Mr. & Mrs. Sendy & Shiffy Orenstein Mr. & Mrs. Dovid & Hendy Posner Mr. Yoely Rosenberg
Mr. Adam Saihlape Mr. & Mrs. Yitzchok & Chaya Schwimmer Mr. & Mrs. Zevi & Rifky Silverstein Mr. & Mrs. Shloimy & Surie Speirer Mrs. Shterna Werner 578 1
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Shabbaton ATIME Shabbatons are uplifting, enriching and inspiring weekends that imbue hundreds of couples with much needed chizuk and strength to face the challenges ahead. Mrs. Miriam Fishoff Shabbaton Coordinator
Eliezer Friedman Event Designer
Mr. Avrumi Stauber Entertainment Coordinator
Weinstock Family / Meal Mart Shabbatton Sponsor
Rabbi Naftuli Weiss Rabbi Chaim A. Unger Rabbi Efraim Wachsman Rabbi Shulim Kessler Mrs. Yendelle Roitenbarg Rabbi David Babad, Tarnapol Kashrus SPEAKERS Rabbi Chaim Aron Unger Rabbi YY Jacobson
Rabbi Mordechai Malach Rabbi Moshie Kaufman Norman Blumenthal Phd Yehudah Weisbord Phd Mrs. Yael Weisbord Rabbi Shulim Kessler Mrs. Ruchy Rosenfeld Mrs. Yehudis Grunwald Mrs. Joy Stimmel Mrs. Vivienne Moskowitz Mr. Bina Simon (Fynalea Mom) Mrs. Malky Levine Dr. Rob Barris Dr. Sara Barris SHABATTON HOSTS Rabbi Mordechai & Rivky Koenig Rabbi & Mrs. Yoel Yitzchock and Chaya Gitty Nissen
Rabbi & Mrs. Benyamin and Shani Feit Mr. Chaim and Kim Rothstein Mr. Yoel and Ruchie Leifer Mr. & Mrs. Moshie Yosef and Surie Schwartz Rabbi Avrumie and Ratzy Horowitz Mr. & Mrs. Shaya and Surie Moskowitz Mr. & Mrs. Moshie and Leah Webster Mr. Yakov Yosef and Malki Grunberger Mr. & Mrs. Sholom and Rivky Kushner Mr. & Mrs. Mendel and Brenda Katina Mr. & Mrs. Alter and Yetti Katz
A TIME Support Forum Our extremely popular site has thousands of members from around the world. The site is a great source of information and encouragement. SUPPORT FORUM COORDINATORS: Esther Chanie Dushinsky Chanie Wachsman MODERATORS/SCREEN NAMES Life’s Great Write Away MeToo Estie Momtobe Medforum
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COORDINATOR OF THE MEDICAL SUPPORT FORUM Ellie, medforum@atime.org DOCTORS THAT ANSWER MEDICAL QUESTIONS Dr. Eric J. Forman, MD Dr. Dan Goldschlag, MD Dr. Lawrence Grunfeld, MD Dr. Nachum Katlowitz, MD Dr. Joshua Klein, MD Dr. Samantha M. Pfeifer, MD Dr. Eli A. Rybak, MD Dr. Peter N. Schlegel, MD
A TIME Magazine A comprehensive and very popular magazine exclusive for A TIME couples and for fertility centers. Each magazine offers informative articles from medical professionals on the advances in infertility; uplifting stories from A TIME members sharing their experiences; lists of available medical resources in members’ communities, humor, inspiration, information and a readers write column where we share letters from each other. Shaarei Tikvah Mrs. Devoiry Goralnik
Mr. Y. Rosenberg Mr. S. Schlesinger
Editor in Chief
Yiddish Editors
Mrs. Faigy Mozes
Mrs. Rivky Herzog
Managing editor
Graphic Design
Mrs. Adina Lebovic Mrs. Shulamis Krumbein
Darkei Tivkah A TIME’s magazine for those experiencing secondary infertility
Mrs. Faigy Mozes Mrs. Adina Lebovic Mrs. Shulamis Krumbein Editors
Contributing editors
Chava Women’s Health Division Mrs. Ruchie Freilich Chava Event Coordinator
Dr. Heather Appelbaum Mrs. Miri Friedman Mrs. Shani Goldner Dr. Jessica Jacobs Dr. Andrei Rebarber
Mrs. Sharon Safdieh Dr. Alan Adler Dr. Alan D Garely Dr. Daniel Salzman Dr. Gila Leiter Dr. Peer Dar Dr. Scott Chudnof Dr. Keith Isaacson
Dr. Chuck Miller Dr. Shai Pri Paz Dr. Victor Rosenberg Dr. Victor Grazi Dr. David Lubbel Dr. Andrew Goldstein Dr. Joshua Segal Dr. Todd Rosen
Support Groups Couples can join their peers on the ATIME conference calls from the comfort of their own home. These individualized phone sessions are moderated by renowned therapists and professionals. Sara Barris, Ph.D. Program Director
Miriam Fishoff Program Coordinator
General Infertility, U.S.A. Dr. Shoshana Karasick General Infertility, International Mrs. Joy Ehrman Secondary Infertility Mrs. Chumi Friedman
Mrs. Ruchy Rosenfeld, CLC Mrs. Toby Werdyger LMHC,NCC Email: secondary@atime.org
Post-Hysterectomy Dr. Shoshana Karasick Email: sisters@atime.org
Pregnancy Loss Mrs. Chumi Friedman Mrs. Yonina Kaufman, LCSW, Ms. Ed.
Unsuccessful IVF Cycle Dr. Sara Barris
Mothers of Couples Experiencing Infertility Mrs. Rivka Feit
General Infertility, Men’s Group Enhancing your Marriage Mrs. Brany Rosen Adoption Dr. Sara Barris
For more information how to join a Support Group: 718.686.8912 • events@atime.org 578 1
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ATIME Nurses
WEST ORANGE Dina Goldstein, RN
Specialty nurses provided by A TIME are available to administer injections when necessary.
WESTGATE Ella Rachel Mann, RN
CALIFORNIA ENCINO Farzaneh Tabibian, RN
MIAMI BEACH Malka Feibush Bina Weiss RN
ILLINOIS
LOS ANGELES Mimi Andrusier, RN
CHICAGO Chaya Siegel, RN Bina Simon, RN
VALLEY VILLAGE Renee Mazlin, RN Yael Rosenthal, RN
CANADA MONTREAL Mrs. Demercur, RN Faigy Hershkowitz, RN Flora Sasportas, RN TORONTO Aldith Baker, RN Eve Gallingan, RN Chavie Kestenbaum, RN Joanne Lang, RN Elisheva Lightstone, RN Malky Meckler, RN Rochel Travis, RN
SKOKIE Julie Feinberg, RN Beth Schwartz, RN
MARYLAND BALTIMORE Jenny Fogel, PA Rus Ifrah Evelyn Shnier, RN SILVER SPRINGS Chani Feldman, RN
MICHIGAN SOUTHFIELD Debby Kaplan, RN
FLORIDA
MISSOURI
BOCA RATON Sara Bienenfeld PA Judith Kaplan Yehudis Kaplan-Finman, CNM Shoshana Kassorla RN BSN.
ST. LOUIS Chava Weinman, RN
BOYTON BEACH Sandra Goodman
NEW JERSEY BERGENFIELD Leah Kramer, RN DEAL Dina Grazzi, RN
CORAL SPRINGS Sara Hurwitz RN
EDISON/HIGHLAND PARK Aviva Wolgemuth, RN
FORT LAUDERDALE Marissa Rosenbaum
ENGLEWOOD Stefanie Schwartz, RN
HOLLYWOOD Shira Melcer-Freitag RN
FAIR LAWN Naomi Nussbaum, RN
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HIGHLAND PARK Draizy Wald, PA HILLSIDE Goldy Malek Yossi Malek LAKEWOOD Ariel Beniflah Chaya Bodner, RN Michal Brull, CPT Esty Caplan, RN Chanie CHapler Bracha Cohn, RN Penina Danziger, RN Shoshana Diamond, RN Alanna Fayazi, RN Chani Friedman, RN Baila Geltzehler, RN Esther Greenspan, RN Esty Horovicz Tziporah Joseph, RN Esther Pernikoff, RN Fraidy Portnoy Varonica Rizzi Roiza Tesler Chana Tropper,RN Chaya Valot LONG BRANCH Jacqueline Gemal, RN PASSAIC Shifra Eisenman Aliza Feit, RN Chaya Bracha Hirsch Shalva Hirsch, RN Sarah Schiffman, RN TEANECK Rachel Abraham, RN Lisa Rothschild, RN L’Via Weisinger, RN Rachel Yolkut, RN, BSN
NEW YORK BRONX Linda Torres, RN RIVERDALE Sarah Adelson, RN Stephene Bellin, RN Sandra Goodman, NP YONKERS Rina Ginat, RN BENSONHURST Dina Lapp, RN BORO PARK Ruchy Cohn Tami Frenkel Janie Friedman, RN Gary Guttman Miriam Herman, RN Pilar Morales, RN Rechy Moseson RN Shulamis Nove Simi Phillip PA AJ Rothstein Laurana Sapolla, RN Shevy Serhofer, RN Leah Sprei, CMA Barbara Sundak, RN Esther Weiss CANARSIE Penny Peterson/ Monroe,RN CROWN HEIGHTS Tzipora Clapman, RN Chayenka Silberstein Esty Slavin, PAC FLATBUSH Esty Baida Chany Bodenstein, RN Rina Dayan Adina Erez, PA
Rachel Halpert RN Baila Horowitz Elisa Hurewitz Chava Kaplowitz, RN Chava Levy, RN Judy Lustig, RN Cindy Melamed, PA Leat Romano, RN Yael Saadon Shalva Shashitsky, RN Allison Tawil KENSINGTON Marina Dukhan, DO Tirtzah Karuszyner, RN MARINE PARK Sarah Goldman, RN SEA GATE Chany Kimelfeld, RN WILLIAMSBURG Chaya S. Franczoz, RN Yitty Mandel GREAT NECK Betty Bandary, RN Orly Steinberg, RN LAWRENCE Rivky Fischer, CNA,CPT Dr. Mermelstein
Miriam Rivka Rozen LONG ISLAND Elisa Horowitz Shevy Serhofer, RN VALLEY STREAM Rosa Fernandez, RN WEST HEMPSTEAD Audrey Davidowitz, MD Yael Roth WOODMERE Alyssa Sacks RN MANHATTAN LOWER EAST SIDE Leah Homnick PCA, CPT
Auction Coordinator
Faigy H. Einhorn Auction Book Editor
Dina Fridrich Contribution Coordinator
MONSEY Chaya Back, RN Chaya Becker, RPA Blimy Brill Sherry Broidy, RN Samuel Feder Leah Lichstein, RN Brocha Lichtenstein, RNC Yehudis Reichman, RN Chevy Unger RMA CPT Leah Webster Malka Weinstein, RN
FAR ROCKAWAY Yehudis Brown, RN, BSN Shani Feierman Rena Gordon, RN Esty Klein, RPAC Dina Kret WASHINGTON HEIGHTS Sarah Schechter, RN Malki Schuler Sharon Sommer, RN Faigy Singer, RN Cindy Melamed, PA Avigail Weiss, RN Arielle Siegel, RN FLUSHING MONROE Anat Benjamin, MD Eileen Grimes, RN Miriam R. Heimowitz, RN Vickie Nowosielski, RN UPPER WEST SIDE Rachel Rindner Rachel Rndner Fabiene Rottenberg, DPM Shira Westreich, RN
Auction Credits Mordechai Trieger
Ruty Koenig, RPAC
Dorothy Prey, RN Rivky Sandel, CPT
JAMAICA Esther Natanov, RN KEW GARDENS Adina Irina Aronova, RN Adina Berger, RN Dena Friedman FNP-BC Aviva Gluck, RN Esther roman Sheva Turk, RN Rivka Leah Zuckerman STATEN ISLAND Marcia Brathwaitte, RN Arlene Jacobson, RN Esther Kay, RN
OHIO CLEVELAND Aliza Feingold, RN CLEVELAND HEIGHTS Leviah Hauer Aviva Kupfer, RN Leah Kushner, RN
TEXAS HOUSTON Tzipora Schoen
Live Drawing 5780 Art direction & design by the team at Spotlight Design
Naomi Nachman
The Ice Cream House
Host
Auction host and sponsor
Moshe Muchnik Zalman Friedman 718-493-2866 SpotlightDesign.com
Chaya Gitty Nissin
Real To Reel
Coordinator
Web Broadcasting
Rebbetzin Miriam Swerdlov & Mindy Blumenfeld, LCSW
Zalman Koppel
Printing by Zev Spira Universal Media Printing We would especially like to thank all of our dedicated volunteers who selflessly give of their precious time of day and night and all of our generous sponsors who contributed toward this auction.
Sound Engineer
Round-table discussion
Malkie Knopfler Entertainment
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Elite Sponsors A special thank you to our Elite Sponsor Members from around the globe. Your compassion and generosity goes a long way to making the dreams of thousands of couples a reality. May you be zoche to much gezunt and nachas מתוך שמחה והרחבת הדעת.
Rabbi Chaim Weichman Director of Development
Jack Abady
The Baras Family
The Broniatowski Family
Brooklyn, NY
Brooklyn, NY
Silver Spring, MD
In honor of my wife Fatima
לע”נ ר’ יוסף יצחק בן ר’ דוד ע”ה
In honor of Hagaon R’ Shmuel Fuerst Shlita
The Adams Family
Dr. and Mrs. Craig Basman
Monsey, NY
New York, NY
לע”נ ר’ אליעזר חיים בנימין בן ר’ אברהם ע”ה
Brooklyn, NY
Mr. and Mrs. Eli Berkovsky Far Rockaway, NY
Mordechai and Mechal Amar
Nina and Jerome Bistritz
Brooklyn, NY In honor of our son Moshe Aron Yedidya
Miami Beach, FL With much hakaros hatov for all that Mrs. Rosen, Mrs. C. Friedman and the rest of the dedicated staff do.
Jake and Betty Arjang Great Neck, NY
Mr. and Mrs. Mechel Blau
,לע”נ ר’ יעקב בן ר’ אליהו ואסתר בת ר’ שמואל ע”ה
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Los Angeles, CA
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Reliable Fast Cash לזכות להצלחה בגשמיות וברוחניות בכל Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Chapman Chicago, IL In honor of the birth of Gittel Tova
Daniel Chrem
Talking Fashion
Brooklyn, NY
Brooklyn, NY
Dr. and Mrs. Jonathan Guenoun
Dedicated in honor of my wife Stacey, an amazing and loving wife and mother. I pray that the couples helped by ATIME have healthy children and may the mothers be half as good a mother as Stacey is to our children.
718-253-9825
New York, NY
Eli & Elisheva Cohen
לע”נ ר’ מרדכי בן ר’ דוד ע”ה Arie and Reva Fellner
Murray Alon
Brooklyn, NY
לע”נ ר’ יוסף שמואל בן ר’ אלימלך ’ ר’ מאיר מרדכי בן ר,ישראל ע”ה גענענדל בת ר’ יוסף מנחם,עמרם מאניש ור’ יצחק יהודה בן ר’ ישראל
Eli & Naomi Hamui and Family
Marc and Yvanne Franco and Family
Uri and Aliza Horowitz
Brooklyn, NY
לע”נ ר’ אברהם בן אסתר
Silver Spring, MD Zechus for a refuah shleimah for Moshe Binyamin ben Baila Hinda and Ahuva Meryla bas Esther Falchin
Brooklyn, NY
The Drillman Family
In honor of our Parents, Barabara and Abie Franco and Vivian and Alan Tobias
Lawrence, NY
לע״נ ר׳ יהודה בן ר׳ יצחק לע״נ מלכה בלומא בת ר׳ משה לע״נ ר׳ יוסף דוד בן ר׳ יצחק ולכבוד בני אריאל דוד בן דבורה וכלתי שיינדל ציפורה בת בלומא לזרעא חיה וקימא
Mr. Charles Gelfenstein Boca Raton, FL
Flushing, NY
Chaim and Jennie Jacobson Spring Valley, NY
לע”נ ר’ ארי’ יואל בן ר’ חיים גבריאל ע”ה Meyer Jeger
L’zchus for my children and grandchildren, Meyer Alexander Shammai Gelfenstein and Family
Flushing, NY
Samuel Gelnick
Mordechai Katz
לע”נ שעניא בת ר’ משה ע”ה
Lillian and Morris Dweck Brooklyn, NY L’ulei Nishmas Solly Bas Mazel and Ivat bas Zehuye a”h
Woodmere, NY In honor of the entire ATIME staff, for all the chesed that they do
Dovid & Shira Efroymson Inwood, NY
In the zechus of A.F.R. and G.W
Rachel & Dov Erdfarb In memory of Rachel’s mother, Arline Edelblum
Melmed Family Lawrence, NY
לע”נ הרב דוד בן ר’ פסח מלמד ע”ה Rabbi and Mrs. Eliyahu Farhi
Linda and Kevin
Sara Glatzer Brooklyn, NY
Bergenfield, NJ
Brooklyn, NY
The L Family Jackson, NJ
Mr. and Mrs. Naftoli Goldgrab
With tremendous gratitude to Hashem!
Inwood, NY
Beverly & Ezra Grazi Brooklyn, NY In memory of Our fathers Lew Grazi - Eliyahu ben Mazal and Abe Zalta Avraham ben Sarah a’h
Lederman Family Postville, IA
בלומא,לע”נ חנה בת ר’ אברהם יעקב ומרים בת ר’ משה יעקב,בת ר’ אברהם הכהן ע”ה
Brooklyn, NY
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Chanie Mandelman Brooklyn, NY
’לע”נ ר’ יוסף בן ר’ שמואל זאנוויל וחי הענא בת ר’ יהודה דוב ע”ה DL Mishulovin
Yitzchok and Deena Perelmuter
Tzvi Dov and Shoshanna Spiegel
Baltimore, MD
Brooklyn, NY
l”ilui nishmat HaRav Chaim Mordechai (Kastel) ben Shraga Feivel, Zecher Tzaddik L’Vracha
In honor of all those who tirelessly work on this very worthy cause, may Hashem grant you all continued good Health to continue his Avodas Hakodesh.
Los Angeles, CA
ר’ יהושע,לע”נ ר’ אליעזר בן ר’ מיכאל ר’ אהרן,העשיל בן ר’ אהרן אליעזר ושטערנא,אליעזר בן ר’ יהושע העשיל שרה בת ר’ יהושע העשיל ע”ה
Daniel and Margaret Retter
Moishe and Zehava
Mr. and Mrs. Judah Rosensweig
Toms River, NJ
Bronx, NY
לע’’נour grandparents ר’ יחיאל הכהן ומרת רייבא רוזנבלט ע’’ה
Jamaica, NY
Shimon Chaim Muehlgay Lawrence, NY
Shani Rumstein & Family
לרפואה שלימה אבי מורי לוי בן רחל ולבריאות השלימות שבע-אמי מורתי חיינע בת בת חי’ שרה גאלדא ולזכות לזיווג הגון בקרוב ובניקל ולהצלחה בכל הענינים ברו”ג ולזכות לכל המשפחה
Far Rockaway, NY
Yossi & Yael Nathanson Houston, TX
In honor of all the ATIME volunteers who help make dreams turn into reality
Brooklyn, NY
לע״נ מוהר״ר יואל בן מוהר״ר חנוך העניך זצ״ל ואשתו מרת חנה בת מוהר״ר חיים יצחק אייזיק זצ״ל ולע״נ ר׳ אשר ישעיהו בן ר׳ אליהו זצ״ל ואשתו מרת שפרה בת ר׳ יחזקאל שרגא זצ״ל Rabbi & Mrs. David Toback Staten Island, NY
לז”נ אבי מורי ר’ יהודה דוד בן ר’ משה
לע”נ ר’ רפאל אברהם גרשום צבי בן הרב דוד יהונתן ע”ה
Avrohom Dov Schlaff
Mr & Mrs Itchie & Chayki Toder
David Farkas Z”L
Brooklyn, NY
Brooklyn, NY
Niedermans and Designy Product Photography Airmont, NY
Mr. and Mrs. Yussie Ostreicher Lawrence, NY
Daniel and Elana Peikes Clifton, NJ
לע”נ ר’ משה בן הרב דניאל ע”ה לכבוד היארצייט הראשונה כ”ט טבת
Mr. and Mrs. Ahron Schorr Toms River, NJ
Brooklyn, NY L’iluy nishmos: Rivkah and R’ Yisrael Aryeh Skovronsky, Alte Hinda and HaRav Nosson Dov Sharfman, and HaRav Boruch Dovid Aryeh Sharfman
Chani Sobel לע”נ פערל בת ר’ אלעזר ע”ה
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Tovah Capital Group LLC Far Rockaway, NY
Yechezkel and Baila Skovronsky
Brooklyn, NY
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Sheya and Chaya Teitelbaum
’ ר,לע”נ ר’ יוסף מאיר בן ר’ אליעזר שרה,יעקב אליהו בן ר’ אשר אנשיל ’ וטובה איטא בת ר,בת ר’ ישראל אהרן יהודה דוב צבי ע”ה Rabbi and Mrs. Akiva Wadler Brooklyn, NY
לע”נ עטל רחל בת ר’ נפתלי חיים ורבקה פערל בת ר’ אברהם הלוי ע”ה
Feivy and Leah Weinberger
Mr. and Mrs. Mendy Yudin
Brooklyn, NY
Valley Stream, NY
,לע”נ ר’ אברהם טובי’ יהונתן בן ר’ צבי ופיגא,ר’ יעקב יוסף בן ר’ שרגא פייבל בת ר’ ישראל ע”ה
לע”נ הרב שלמה שמואל בן הרב יעקב ישראל זצ”ל
Dr. and Mrs. Reuven Weinstein
New York, NY
Brooklyn, NY
Cong. Ohab Zedek לרפואה שלמה לכל חולי קוביד
לע”נ צפורה מלכה בת ר’ יחזקאל שרגא ע”ה
Mark and Yael Zoldan
Dr. and Mrs. Eliezer Weiss
Lezchus refuos veyeshous for all in need
Highland Park, NJ
Mr. and Mrs. Andrew Weissman
CORPORATE SPONSORS
Passaic, NJ
Lezchus that Hashem should send a yeshua to all the couples waiting for a Yeshua
Eli Hamui
Spring Valley, NY
לע”נ רחל יוכבד בת ר’ משה הלוי ע”ה
In honor of the entire selfless and dedicated staff at ATIME
Yanky and Estie Weisz
L’ulei nishmas R’ Yosef ben Nazli a”h Fteha
Rhonda Weissman
Brooklyn, NY
לע”נ ר’ שמואל שמעלקע בן ר’ זאב אהרן ע”ה Mr. and Mrs. Avraham Z. Werner Lakewood, NJ
Motty Katz, 718-853-5526
With gratitude to Dr. Eli Rybak, Vileena Joseph and the ATIME Mashgichos.
לע”נ ר’ יעקב בן מזל ע”ה
designybrand.com
נתנדב לזכות זיווג הגון Mr. and Mrs. Larry Winter Beverly Hills, CA
לע”נ ר’ אברהם בן ר’ יוסף דוד ע”ה
Dedicated as a zechus for our children
Toms River, NJ
L’zchus our sister and brother-inlaw, who should b”ezH have a child b’karov
Mr. and Mrs. Yechiel Yarmish
לע”נ ר’ יצחק בן ר’ אליעזר דוד ע”ה
Mr. and Mrs. Moshe Wolfson
Brooklyn, NY
Talking Fashion 718-253-9825 Tovah Capital Group LLC. 929-273-2082
לזכות רפואה שלימה לחנה אילה בת זהבה
Head2Sole Care LLC head2solecare@gmail.com
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לזכות צבי אריה עזריאל בן שרה רבקה
הקדוש ר’ דוד משה זצ”ל
לע”נ ר’ פנחס בן ר’ גרז ור’ בנימין בן ר’ יצחק מאיר ע”ה
לע”נ רבקה בת ר’ צבי יעקב ע”ה
לע”נ ליליאן בת מרג’י ע”ה In honor of ATIME. You gave such עטרת זקנים בני בנים meaning to
ותפארת בנים אבותם
לע”נ עלקא בת ר’ מנחם דוד ע”ה
לע”נ ר’ חנה ראובן בן ר’ משה אהרן לע”נ צביה מרים בת ר’ אברהם אביגדור ע”ה לע”נ ר’ דוד בן ר’ יצחק אייזיק ע”ה
לע”נ ר’ שניאור בן ר’ ישראל מאיר ע”ה ולע”נ אסתר פרומט בת ר’ נתן הלוי ע”ה לע”נ חנה בת ר’ אברהם פסח ע”ה
לזכות לזיווג הגון יונה אייטון ישראל בן מינדל שיינדל
In memory of Loretta Coleman
עטא לאה יערס בּת יקותיאל יוסף הלוי לע”נ ר’ דוד צבי בן ר’ גד’ל מרדכי הלוי ע”ה לרפואה שלמה שרה בת חי’ הענא וישראל יהודה בן צפורה Leiluy nishmat Sarah bat Shahlah and Mordechai Ben Rina Sponsored lezchus all the couples
לע”נ תמר בת ר’ אריה ראובן בן אברהם אבינו ור’ זלמן בן אהרן
לע”נ ר’ משה בן ר’ דוד שמואל שמעלקא ולע”נ ר’ אהרן דוד בן ר’ שמעון ע”ה לע”נ ר’ בן ציון בן ר’ משה ור’ ישראל משה מאיר בן ר’ מנשה הלוי ע”ה לזכות רבקה בת חוה לזיווג הגון בקרוב
לע”נ ר’ יחזקאל בן ר’ אברהם ע”ה לע”נ ר’ גבריאל בן ר’ פינחס ע”ה
לע”נ הרב משה זאב בן הרב יעקב חיים הלוי פאללאק זצ”ל אבד”ק גראסווארדיין
לע”נ מרים שרה בת ר’ יעקב משה, גאלדע פערל בת ר’ יעקב ע”ה
לע”נ ר’ ישראל יצחק בן ר’ דוד, שפרה בת ר’ מנחם מענדל ,משה בן ר’ אברהם ,ושרה רבקה בת ר’ שמואל ע”ה לע”נ ר’ אברהם בן ר’ דוב בער ע”ה לע”נ הגאון ר’ אפרים בן הרב דוב זצ”ל והגאון ר’ עמרם בן הרב שמואל דוד זצ”ל לע”נ ר’ יונה בן ר’ שלום, רחל בת ר’ אברהם ,ר’ יוסף בן ר’ יעקב, פייגה בת ר’ יעקב ע”ה לע”נ יוכבד בת ר’ אליעזר הלוי ,שרה שולמית בת ר’ יצחק ע”ה לע”נ ר’ חיים ישעיה בן ור’ יוסף מאיר ע”ה Kiffel לע”נ ר’ נפתלי צבי בן ר’ יהודה ע”ה לזכות כל הצריכים ברכה לזרעא חיא וקימא
לזכות נחמה דינה בת לאה Lezchus Klal Yisroel should not need services like ATIME anymore
מוקדש לזכות נשמותיהם של הרב הקדוש ר’ לוי יצחק בן שרה סאשה, הרב הקדוש ר’ משה בן ר’ שמואל ,הרב הקדוש ר’ ישעיה בן ר’ משה ,והרב הקדוש ר’ חיים זנוויל בן ר’ משה ויוטא ציפורה ,ולזכות משה ברוך בן אסתר רייזל וכל משפחתו לע”נ אסתר בת ר’ שלמה ע”ה לע”נ ר’ נח בן ר’ גדליה ולע”נ ר’ גדליה בן ר’ אברהם ע”ה לע”נ ר’ דוד בן ר’ אליעזר הכהן ע”ה לזכות זיווג הגון בקרוב לתמר לאה בת דבורה איטא לע”נ ר’ ישראל שלמה בן ר’ חיים צבי, ולזכות לאסתר מרים בת רחל לזש”ק לע”נ ר’ משה בן ר’ נחמן הלוי ע”ה לע”נ הרב הצדיק ר’ יצחק בן הרב
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Family $72
Sensational Sukkos | Electricity on Wheels | Supreme Savings Wedding Whirlwind | Tampa Pioneer | Kitchen Club
PRICE
$72
Family $54
Swiss Serenity | Family Travels | Home Makeover Splendid Summer | Dine by Design | Simcha Star
$54
Family $36
Split to Cool | Pesach Chef | Silver Stations Castle Retreat | Finely Furnished | Teardrop Exploit
$36
Family $26
Airbnb Adventures | Master Mattress | Appliance Profile VIP View | Orlando Villa | Spa Unlimited
$26
Women $36
You’re a Bestseller! | Hotel at Home | Think Mink Luminous Leichter | What a Gem! | Mall Madness
$36
Women $26
Florida Fling | Closet Challenge | Allegra Allure Shop Local | BK Charm | Mega Massage
$26
Men $36
Virtual Profits | Take Toyota! | Shas Yid Meron Experience | Sukkah in a Snap | Kingly Kaarah
$36
Men $26
Magnificent Megillah | Shtetl Nostalgia | Automatic Auto Timely Fashion | Work it Out! | Perfectly Private
$26
Teens $18
Purim on Wheels | Disney Dynamic | Schottenstein Collection Teen Market | Camping Out | Spy Secrets
$18
Kids $10
Zip it Up! | Ski Champions | Junior Racetrack It’s a Carnival! | Doll Dreams | Custom Costumes
$10
TOTAL
Sub Total
* Early bird orders will automatically be doubled
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1 Ticket in all 4 Family Packages $100 ($188 Value)
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1 for $54 5 for $180 25 for $500 1 for $72 5 for $180 54 for $1,000
Family Trip to Israel Split The Pot
1 for $26 5 for $72 12 for $144 30 for $260
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