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Tonya Monroe
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DECEMBER 2020
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Deborah’s Place You’re Safe Here
Front Inside Cover Merry Christmas God’s Diva
Tonya Monroe The Editor
Dr. Cheryl Peavy ARTICLE CONTRIBUTORS Tonya Monroe, Inside of You is Greatness
Andrea Merriman, It’s A Wonderful Life
Andrea Hopwood, 5 Strategies to Prevent Credit Issues
Tonya Cossie-White, What’s Up with Your Mental
Dr. Clara L Peters, Jacqueline Thompson, Beyond Skin Deep
Doretta Gadsden, Women Will Bloom
Angel Richards, Declutter Your Life Before the New Year
SharRon Jamison, Deciding to Soar
Karen 3 | P a KJ g e Johnson, – SPOTLIGHTSISTER Who Am It?
Teresa Perkins, LaYerzInteriors
Back Cover
Keandra Ward Institute for Entrepreneurs Inside Back Cover
Cheranissa Roach,
MAGAZINE
Coach Char
Dr. Cheryl Peavy
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The Editor
Letter from Editor He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds- Psalm 147:3 ESV Celebrating Christmas and the birth of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is the time of the year when friends and family come together for a joyous occasion. Opening gifts, sharing stories, embracing the beauty of decorations, and seeing those big smiles on the little ones faces but not everyone is celebrating. Especially during this 2020 year of COVID-19. As the year come to an end, I want to focus on women who are hurting, experiencing grief, and holding on to moments of depression. Women who look at this holiday season as nothing to celebrate. We at Spotlight Sister Magazine want to pour into you because you’re not alone. We understand how you feel with all the uncertainty and witnessing things we would have never imagined, not to mention how grieving from the loss of a loved one could easily take precedence over the holidays. Because we care, we want you to know that this issue is dedicated to you because you’re loved, you’re not forgotten, and you’re an incredibly special woman. Although feelings of emptiness, being along, tired, afraid, and sad are emotions that you may be experiencing, take to heart that there are other women sharing these same emotions. I’m one of them. This time of the year is difficult for me. I lost my grandmother and mother during the Holiday season two weeks apart. Oh, how I wish someone would have poured into me during my down moments instead of saying, “Get over it!” Did they not understand that grief is a natural process of losing a loved one and that everyone has every right to grieve their way? Grief has no time limit. You learn how to adapt to living your life without your loved one, but you may never stop grieving. A lot of what you may be experiencing could also be emanating from grief. Whatever it is that has you feeling the way that you do, it’s important to allow yourself to go through your emotions. Release! Take time to honor you as we celebrate one of the most precious gifts we could ever receive. The birth of Jesus. Grief can cause a lot of pain so think of how your loved one would want you spend the holidays. I have some incredibly special memories of my mom and keep all those pieces of her in a keepsake box. Yes, I still spend time alone and cry. Sometimes I smile and sometimes I just spend time alone with God. What I want you to know during this holiday season is that God is always there for you. He loves you. He knows your pain and if you allow Him, he will heal your heart. Lastly, remember all the wonderful things your loved one spoke, taught and did. They’re always with you. Happy Holidays Be Blessed and be safe P.S. If you’re interested in learning more about my personal story of grief, I have an e-book called “Take All the Time You Need” which shares five stages of grief on Amazon.com
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Tonya Monroe
Founder of Godsdiva, LLC and The Worth Within Project Certified Life Coach/Certified Motivational 6|Page – SPOTLIGHTSISTER MAGAZINE Speaker/Author/Stylist
“Your worth is like a shadow, that should follow you everywhere you go!” -Coach Tonya Monroe
“Inside of you is greatness” She is classy! She is fabulous! She is fearless! She is brave! She is bold! She never gives up! She loves herself flaws and all. I would like to introduce to you the phenomenal Shera Tonya Monroe. She is a godly woman, motivational speaker, author and CEO and Founder of Gods Diva LLC. DIVA stands for Divine Inspiration Victorious Affirmation of God. Powerful, courageous, beautiful resilient and stylish is who she is. I had the pleasure of interviewing Tonya. From damaged to a woman that God uses to impact other women to overcome and learn that their worth. Who is Tonya Monroe God’s Diva at her core? I am amazing woman who knows her worth in Jesus Christ. At my core I went from hell to healed. I asked God how He sees me and when He revealed to me how He saw me, I never looked
back. I am a woman who knows her worth and doesn’t need the worlds validation because I was validated when Jesus died on the cross. You have mentioned that you were damaged. What was the cause of you being damaged? I was damaged because my father was never part of my life growing up. His absence resulted in domestic violence, suicide attempts, and self-mutilation. I never felt that I was loved by my father.
You have experienced Domestic Violence and Self- Mutilation. How did you heal, from these two experiences? Because I was physically, emotionally, and spiritually tired of carrying the weight that I was never meant to carry, I went to therapy, and finally gave my hatred, hurt, and unforgiveness to God. Although it was a long process, God healed me after seven years and I am finally free. You mentioned that you experienced domestic violence. Can you share how you left the relationship? What advice would you give a women today who is experiencing domestic violence and wants to leave?
Tonya Monroe – Cont’d
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I left the relationship when my mother told me that as much as I was praying I was also getting back with him over and over and she said stop praying if you don't want to leave, if you do want to leave then leave, staying is like a slap in the face to God. How could I pray to God to take me away from that horrible experience because I was insecure that I remained in that relationship afraid to be by myself. My advice is be honest with yourself first and then leave and never look back. Reach out to friends, family, local churches and most importantly God, He will direct your steps and guide your path to peace and healing. Tell us about your business? Godsdiva, LLC is a business dedicated to the spiritual wellness of women through coaching, and teaching. I assist women in building their selfworth blocks to success. We want every woman to know how worthy she is and that women deserve the promises of God. What is the Worth Within Project? CHRISTIAN IN OUR BELIEFS EMPOWERMENT IN OUR APPROACH, AND PURPOSE IN OUR ORGANIZATION The Worth Within Project educates and empowers women with love, laughter, and lessons to understand
their worth in Christ. We teach women how to become who God created THEM to be! What advice would you give a woman who has low self-worth? The first step is to face and deal with what has taken her worth away from her. No one wants to face what has hurt them. Women believe healing happens within 24 hrs. but, it’s an everyday process. The question is: Do women really want to be healed from their hurt or hide from their hurt? Faith in their healing comes from truly facing what hurt them. What advice would you give to your younger self? Absolutely nothing. Everything that has happened in my life allowed me to become the woman I am today. I praise God because He loves me like no one else. Why is self-worth so important for a women to have? Is worth tied into other areas? (Ex: relationship, job opportunities and going after her dreams) Self-Worth is important because it helps to guide a woman to know she is God's creation, she is beautiful, bold, and filled with the power of God. Women have to understand that worth is not tied to jobs, relationships, and dreams, these things are for validation in life. Worth comes from knowing who you are in Christ and not settling
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for anything less because you may be in a wilderness season and you may find yourself single, or your life may not be going the way you want it to go. During these times is when God is drawing you near to Him so he can show you how he sees you. Pray and ask God how He sees you, it will blow your mind. Your worth has always been there but we as women have allowed relationships and childhood trauma's to steal our worth, now it's time to take it back.
took years because the damage was ugly and staring me in the face every day. I got tired of looking at damaged self and began to understand my deliverance was beautiful. One answer. God!
How did you go from damaged to God’s Diva?
www.GodsDivaLLC.com
What is your next project? Self-Worth Classes to teach women that their worth exists. How can others connect with you?
One answer. God! I had to embrace my damage to become delivered. That
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ANDREA MERRIMAN
It’s a Wonderful Life Have you ever watched the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life”, starring Jimmy Stewart? Well, allow me to share with you how it saved my life. This time of the year brings out the best and the worst of feelings. Between the cold, stress of giving, grief and now the isolation mandated by COVID-19, our community and families need extra support. The joy of gifting will be replaced by online purchases and courier deliveries. Let’s face it, the holiday season is not going to be the same. We like the same.
Come with me a moment on a trip down memory lane…
preparing for the big day. The day family would get together and share a feast. Friends were talking about family outings and how they would divvy up time with their significant other and their family. I was always in the conversations but never really. I was always the listener or as some would always say, the bridesmaid and never the bride. I used to wonder when I would find my mate and have someone to bring to family get togethers. No one seemed to notice I was different. Or was it all in my mind? Being a child of God, I prayed often. Asking God to send me a mate. Asking God what was my purpose in life. Why is everyone happy around me and can’t see my pain? Why am I even here? I thought of many ways to stop my existence. You may have asked some of these questions yourself. That is ok, just keep holding on. I found that holding on is the key so keep holding on. The more I prayed the more read my Bible. I read where God said if we want wisdom to ask. So, I did. I came across passages like Romans 8:18 KJV, “For I reckon that the suffering of this present time are
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ANDREA MERRIMAN – Cont’d not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.” This gave be hope that better days were coming so I kept reading and finding more passages. Then one day… I saw this old black and white movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life”. I could relate to the main character. At his lowest an Angel of God appeared and gave him a glimpse of the world without him. Watch the movie if you haven’t seen it. If you have, I challenge you to watch it again and put yourself as the star. I
am glad I did so I can be here to share this with you today. Although 2020 is different. People are the same. We need love and affection. While you are social distancing, reach out as best you can. Someone in your family and/or community are suffering. Set a day or two aside to go down your list and reach out and talk. Listen for the pain and the unspoken feelings. Pray with someone. If you or someone you know need more help call the National Suicide Hotline 800-273-8255.
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5 Strategies to Prevent Credit Issues During the Pandemic find any discrepancies on your credit report, there are plenty of resources on-line that offer do-ityourself programs for credit repair. Disputing by mail provides a clear method for tracking disputes. It is important to stay organized and keep good records in order to yield the best results.
#2 Make Payment Arrangements with Creditors
ANDREA HOPWOOD Challenges arise as the percentage of unemployment among millions of Americans continues to increase as the pandemic progresses. However, in spite of these challenges, there are still multiple ways in which individuals can protect their credit and prosper during this pandemic.
#1 Review your Credit Reports
Check your credit reports for errors. Annualcreditreport.com is a website that consumers use to pull their credit report at no charge. Credit monitoring, such as identity IQ is a great resource in monitoring any changes that may incur on your credit report. In the event that you
The best way you could prevent from having credit issues during the pandemic is to give your creditors a call. Oftentimes creditors have relief programs or hardship programs to help assist consumers during times of crisis. Some creditors will allow you to make partial payments, will suspend payments, or even defer payments. Payments can be deferred from 30 to 90 days, depending on the creditor. If you inform the creditor that you have recently experienced hardship due to the pandemic, inquire about assistance programs that would be best suited for your circumstance.
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Andrea Hopwood – Cont’d #3 Become more Valuable to the Marketplace
What skills do you have that can be transferred into another niche? Currently, many small business owners are looking for people to fill administrative roles remotely such as virtual assistant, graphic designer, social media manager, and enrollment specialist just to name a few. Identify a skillset that will bring you the highest return in income. Leverage your degrees to get a better paying job. Increase your skillset or learn a high-income generating skill. By doing so, you'll be able to position yourself to prosper during the pandemic.
#4 Be strategic
Create goals for your savings, income, and debt freedom. Define how you're going to allocate
income when it comes in. Identify which expenses will be eliminated, the amount of income that will go towards investments, and which debts will be a priority to pay off. For example, if you plan to pay off your car by the end of next year, divide the payoff amount by the number of months in a year, and then create the income you need monthly in order to meet that goal.
#5 Create a Pivot-Plan
Once you repair your personal credit, leveled up your value in the marketplace, and set strategic goals, it’s now time to turn your skillset into a profitable business. Believe it or not, this is the perfect time to start a home-based business. Having great personal credit puts first-time business owners in a prime position to receive business capital. Having your business set up correctly is key. Having the capital to create a profitable business will allow you to have options to create multiple streams of income that will help you to pivot, progress, and profit during the pandemic.
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What's Up with Your Mental? the importance of taking care of mental health, we are raising new silent sufferers or even worse more angry people.
TONYA COSSIE-WHITE What's Up with Your Mental? How important is your mental health? With over 44 million adults dealing with a mental health condition, being aware of its effect on our lives should be a major concern. So many of us suffer in silence due to lack of support, knowledge, or fear of judgment from others. People are hurting, lashing out, being mean, and are not fully aware that this illness passes down to some of our youth. Mental Illness in our youth has risen from 11.93% to 12.63%: https://www.banyanmentalhealth.c om/2018/08/01/why-talking-aboutMental-health-is-so-important/. Children are hurting as well and if we adults cannot show or teach them
I suffered from anxiety for nine years of my life and can admit that because of the bond with my children and love for self, they are far exceeding what they witnessed when they were younger. I am incredibly grateful to say that I have been anxiety free for over three years and consistently educate my children, clients, and their families on what healthy wellbeing looks/feels like. I do this by creating a Wellness Plan that targets working on self through meditation practices, mental vacations, and more.
Real Food Matters When it comes to eating healthy there are many options and variations to choose from. However, diets, trends and fads are the most attractive because they promise fast results. Did you know that according to Marketdata, Americans spent $46.3 billion in weight loss products in 2004, with these numbers significantly growing every year? Livestrong.com/article/390541-factsstatistics-about-dieting It can be overwhelming that most people opt out of better health altogether but here’s what’s more important than jumping on the next health bandwagon. Eat real food. Foods that are grown from the earth,
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Tonya Co ssie-White – Cont’d seafood that is fresh, wild caught, and high in quality. In other words, eat more home cooked meals. This way you are in control of what you eat and can adjust your own measurements or ingredients if needed. I always get the question about the best-packaged food items to purchase. Packaged items can still be consumed in moderation but please be mindful about your choices. Start with reading and understanding the nutrition facts label. They contain important information and should be the determining factor after you have identified the ingredients if its right for you. Additionally, the first ingredient is the most important one in packaged or bottled food items. Let’s take for instance, if the first ingredient is a form of sugar, you’re getting about 60-80% in that one food/beverage package. The front of a packaged item can also sometimes be very deceiving. For example, the FDA allows food manufacturers to put “contains 0 Trans Fat” if the item contains 0.5 grams of Trans Fat. Trans Fat is not good for the body. It is in most packaged foods like cookies, crackers, chips, cereal, and found in vegetable oil. If consumed regularly,
it can raise your LDL (bad) cholesterol causing other health problems.
Here are some quick tips you can apply right away to start a journey of better food choices: •
• • • • •
•
Be honest with yourself and pay attention to how you handle and recover from stressful situations Find a genuine support circle Speak out about your mental illness Take time to listen to your children, they deal with a lot Ten ingredients or less is typically safe to eat If you cannot read the names of the ingredients, it mostly contains chemicals and is not safe Do your research about what’s on the front of the packaged foods (example: organic, sugar free, 0 Trans Fat). Not all that appears good is good for you.
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DR. CLARA L. PETERS button to keep from becoming overwhelmed with things. Remember that each morning you awaken to a new day, there’s an assignment for you to fulfill that’s not just for you but for others attached to your purpose. Don’t fail you! Decree and declare victory over your life. Know that God gives you a new day of peace, joy, happiness, and love. Be willing to receive that. God has given you purpose. Live and walk in it instead of just existing.
The Holiday Season is here, and I’d like to give you a few words of encouragement. God downloaded a message during my quiet time to share with His beautiful daughters and all I could say was thank you Father before the writing began. God has brought us through an abnormal year with a lot of uncertainty during the COVID-19 pandemic, social injustice, and the presidential election. But He kept us. He’s shown us how to stay close to Him to give us hope and strength to see us through. He also dropped this scripture in my spirit to remind us that no matter what’s going on, our trust in Him should never cease. Philippians 4:13 states” I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (NKJV),” This year may not be the place we want to be, but I encourage you to stop, breathe, and press the reset
Testimony: For many years, the holiday seasons were never the same for me after my Queen gained her wings. But today, instead of mourning her absence, I celebrate her because I know she wouldn’t want it any other way. I have my days as many of us may have when it comes to the loss of a love one or things not going right in our lives. What I want you to remember is that it’s up to us to make sure we turn sadness into joy. It may be hard to have joy when a loved one is no longer around but honoring them releases your emotional pain just as honoring yourself releases the pain you feel when things aren’t going right. There’s never an end date to grief but time gives you a better way to cope with it. I know that my mother would not want me mourning her because her last words to me was I’m proud of you daughter. Keep serving Him.
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Women of God, on those days when you may feel down meditate on this scripture and allow it to encourage you that no matter where you are today, God is always with you:
EXCUSES. It’s time to live the life God ordained for me. This year may look abnormal, crazy, or uncertain but you don’t have to give it power over what God has for you.
Joshua 1:9 states “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid;(A) do not be discouraged,(B) for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
One last thing I want to encourage you on is that dash between Sunrise – Sunset. That is your life, your legacy, and your eulogy. My question to you is, are you living out your life the way you want to be remembered? If you are not, please pause for a few moments and think about what that (how you want to be remembered) looks like.
Testimony: There were times in my life when I was having issues with my heart and going back and forth to the hospital for years. I wanted to give up because I wasn’t in a place in my life where I wanted to be, but He whispered I’m right here. I didn’t feel that whisper, but I believed Him when He showed His strength and presence through my three children. They made sure I was good, and that life had to keep moving. God had to remind me as I’m reminding you that there is a reason for us to get up each day. There is a reason for us to show up as the amazing woman He created us to be. God knows His plans for us here is proof: Jeremiah 29:11 “ For I know the plans(A) I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper(B) you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future,”. To be that person God created you to be, self-love is a priority for Him to lead and guide you. If you feel like you’re in a place where you don’t want to be, say to yourself, NO MORE
This is something that I challenge women on all the time because I was set free from a life of hell so that I could encourage and empower women to find their voice. To know that their lives matter and that’s ok to be your authentic self. Don’t allow life to pass you by without enjoying it as you desired. Many live for others. Don’t be that woman. Enjoy the life God planned for you to the fullest and know that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. I want to say to each of you, I’m proud of you. Keep moving and walking in victory toward your destiny and do not let anything or anyone stop you from being the amazing woman God created you to be. Blessings and Love I pray that you, your family, and friends are doing well!
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- Dr. Clara L. Peters
BEYOND SKIN DEEP! are so beautiful. You have a beautiful smile. You could be a model. You have that good hair. Words that could possibly have you in search of inner beauty as you get older. Or were the words you heard sound more like this: You’re a beautiful princess and will grow up to be a beautiful queen. You were created by God as a masterpiece; fearfully and wonderfully made. Be proud of who you are and hold your head high. You can be whatever you dream to be. Your skin is royal and don’t you ever forget that. Don’t you ever let hurtful words damage your self-worth. Words that could possibly make you feel on top of the world.
JACQUELINE THOMPSON
Beyond Skin Deep! What does that mean to you or how do you interpret that when you hear it? Ever heard that saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder? Well, did you know that the beholder can be defined by you! Did you grow up hearing words like this: You’re beautiful. You’re so pretty. You have hair like a white girl. She’s a pretty like skinned girl or chocolate girl. Isn’t her shape the bomb? Look at those Tina Turner legs. Your eyes
Well now that you’re all grown up, which words resonate with you today? Normally, the words that are heard the most are the ones that are instilled in a woman and no one could penetrate her beliefs of who she was. This could be good or not so good depending on how the words played on her self-worth. Either her self-esteem was shattered from childhood or it was lively and empowered her to be the woman that God created her to be. The good news is that Beyond Skin Deep is not what people say to you, it’s what you believe about yourself. Beyond Skin Deep is way more than the makeup that we put on our
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face every day: mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, foundation, eye shadows, brow gel, bronzer, etc. It’s more than our physical appearance. These things can enhance facial beauty and physical appearance, but they are not the makeup of beauty. Beauty starts from within. It starts with self-love and knowing that you were created by God as a masterpiece, fearfully and wonderfully made. It’s knowing that you are worthy. That you are enough, and that God doesn’t make mistakes in His creation. If you love yourself unconditionally and believe what God says about you, then your inner beauty flows out naturally. Love is in you and Love will be expressed to others from your inner spirit. Remember that God didn’t make any mistakes in His creation so if you’re looking at a disability that’s clogging the vision of your beauty, REMOVE IT! If there is doubt in your mind when you look in the mirror at yourself that you’re not beautiful, REMOVE IT! IF there’s an inkling of negative thinking of who you are, REMOVE IT because you are Beyond Skin Deep and your beauty flows from an internal essence, outwardly.
arch or their cheek bones being perfect or how their eye color complimented their skin tone, etc. I would give them a motivational speech about how makeup is intended to enhance their beauty because most women didn’t see that at all and only wanted to know how I could make them beautiful. After the makeover, I must say that my level of gratification was seeing the expression on their faces. The ooooh and ahhhs, the I look so beautiful, the thank you so much making my mom look ten years younger is what I longed for but don’t get me wrong, these were words that I loved to hear but it wasn’t what I wanted them to believe about themselves. That makeup is what made them beautiful. I wanted them to walk away knowing that they were beautiful with or without makeup.
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If you want to test your inner beauty, ask yourself? Do I practice self-love (embracing imperfections as a part of God’s creation). How is my relationship with God? Do I believe what God says about me? How well do I interact with others? Am I loving, kind, caring, and giving? How do I feel when others are hurting or sad? Do I have compassion for others? Am I always trying to find ways to motivate, empower or inspire others? These are the things that make you beautiful on the inside. When beauty doesn’t start from within, outer beauty has no substance. It has no value. Beyond Skin Deep is going past the skin to the heart. To the core of who you are. What you have to offer others is the beauty that is within you. Beauty is not defined by your surface level. Beauty is defined by your character.
beauty and having a compliment like that should be received as one of high regard. So, as we close out 2020, let’s go into 2021 knowing that we will either continue to be beautiful inside out or work on accomplishing that goal. Do not focus on your imperfections. Do not listen to demeaning words towards you. Do not look in the mirror and say negative things about yourself. Beauty for you in 2021 should be about the makeup of your inner beauty that will naturally flow outwardly. That’s Beyond Skin Deep!
Coach Jacqueline
So, another question you might ask: Does external beauty matter? Absolutely it does because there is not a day that goes by that a woman doesn’t want to feel beautiful externally but if it’s not flowing internally, then a deep search of self is where she should begin. Beauty is not defined by how we look. Beauty is defined by how we look from the inside that flows outwardly. A lot of times you’ll hear people say, she’s beautiful inside out. That’s a compliment to take very seriously because that means that people see inner beauty before they see external
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Doretta Gadsden Strategies to Empower women with a Chronic Diagnosis and Co- Author of Soul Source, stories that share about faith in God and perseverance.
DORETTA GADSDEN A Phenomenal Shera Who Bloomed Living With HIV December is AIDS Awareness Month. In the 1980’s AIDS and HIV was widely spoken about. People lived in fear not understanding AIDS and HIV. It was a death sentence and a lot of people didn’t want to be around people who were diagnosed with AIDS and HIV. I had the pleasure of interviewing Doretta Gadsden. I asked her to share her story with Spotlight Sister Magazine. Doretta Gadsden is a Registered Nurse and Health and Wellness coach. She has lived for over 26 yrs with an AIDS diagnosis. In March of 2019 she was diagnosed with stage 3 rectal cancer. She is presently in remission. Doretta is a two-time Amazon bestselling author, Living Victoriously:
Doretta shares her story with others to show, you are bigger than any diagnosis. She teaches about having Five Pillars that will help guide anyone walking through any health challenge. Mindset, Spirit, Treatment, Support and Faith. Doretta believes with these Five Pillars in place one can handle anything life offers you. Doretta Gadsden lives in Brooklyn, NY. In March of 2020, Doretta lost her husband to a T-Cell Lymphoma. She still knows that with prayer and her five pillars, she will keep moving forward. AIDS and HIV seems to be not widely talked about in recent years. Can you share what they’re and the difference between the two? It is not talked about as before because of the medications and the available quality of life. HIV is manageable today. Years ago, it was a death sentence. The difference between HIV- the Human Immunodeficiency Virus. The virus that causes AIDS.
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DORETTA GADSDEN – Cont’d
did it change your life? How did you feel?
AIDS- Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome- We have an army in our body called our Immune System. A part of that system is CD4 cells. When these cells drop below 200- one is then diagnosed with AIDS or one of the many opportunistic infections such as TB, Pneumonia and reoccurring Fungus Infections.
First, I was shock and afraid, But I had a great woman who gave me my test result, and she shifted the way I would view HIV/AIDS. she invited me to believe that just as I had overcome incest and drug addiction, I could live through that pandemic. She connected me with mostly gay white men who made me feel at home, and I learned about alternative ways to care for myself. It motivated me to write and speak.
You’re an RN and HIV survivor. Can you share your story of how you contracted HIV? Did you contract it from working with the patient(s) with HIV? I was an Intravenous drug abuser in my twenties. I use drugs to cope with the incest that happens to me as a child. I stopped around 1983 when many of the people I was sharing needles with were dying. Though HIV/AIDS had no name then, it was called fever of unknown origin or plain Pneumonia. I know Pneumonia did not kill people or make them waste away like what was happening to my friends and associates. The only thing we all had in common was the shooting gallery, where we shared needles. I surmised that it was in the needles we were sharing. I stopped shooting drugs at that time. 10 years later, I was diagnosed after getting my life together and finishing nursing school. When you learned you had HIV, how
How did family, and loved ones react? Much of my family took it calmly. One brother thought death. The other thought, "Dora comes through everything. She will come through this too." What advice would you give to people to educate themselves about HIV? My advice is to get a test if you are having unprotected sex. You or your partner can carry the virus for years, spreading it, and not know it. Look at how many years I have it and didn't know. If you are positive, eat well, take your medications and supplements, exercise, avoid stress. You can live a full life with HIV today. There are many medications available now. Is there a cure?
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DORETTA GADSDEN – Cont’d There is no known cure, but one can live a full life by taking care of themselves. Either by traditional or alternative treatment. Today, because they have done so much research and improvement, I combine the two. I started taking traditional medication in 2001. When you are complaint, your viral load will get to a point where you cannot infect another. That is a milestone for science. What lifestyle make?
changes
did
you
I avoided stress, went on many retreats, Become a vegetarian (I'm not one today). Prayed, medication and visualization were my core practice. I saw myself living through this pandemic. I avoided any and everyone who looked at me like I would die.
Take care of yourself. Know this is manageable. You are blessed to be living in a time where there are so many medications and resources available. The shame around it is less in many communities. What resources are available? There are books, clinics, groups, and mental health available on and offline How can others connect with you?
YOU CONNECT WITH ME @ www.WomenwillBloom.com and Facebook, Twitter, and Youtube
Any advice you would like to share with people living with HIV/AIDS?
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- Doretta Gadsden.
ANGEL RICHARDS move with less force and more flow. Here’s a quick checklist of the inner work you can clear out to ensure you enter the new year truly clutter free. Declutter Mentally: Those limiting beliefs that have been holding you back from going after your goals and dreams fearlessly. Let it all go. Declutter Emotionally: Those negative emotions such as bitterness, resentment or unforgiveness that you’ve been suppressing. Let it all go.
Declutter Your Life Before the New Year This is typically the season when we begin the decluttering process in preparation of the new year. We deep clean our homes, clear out our garages and finally drop off those donations that have been sitting in the trunk for months. With that clean and fresh energy floating through your home, you feel a sense of accomplishment and are ready for the new beginnings. But are You Really Ready? Cleaning up your environment is just one of seven key areas you should consider when decluttering your life before the new year. There’s so much more we carry with us year-to-year that isn’t always easy to pack up and get rid of but when you do, you can
Declutter Physically: Those habits such as unhealthy eating, inconsistent exercise, and team no sleep. Let it all go. Declutter Spiritually: Those feelings of shame, guilt and condemnation that have placed a wedge between you and God. Let it all go. Declutter Relationally: Those fruitless friendships, toxic relationships and social media connections that no longer serve you. Let it all go. Declutter Financially: Those poor spending habits, the outdated money mindset and fear of investing in yourself. Let it all go. Declutter Habitually: Those habits that position you for less, lack and limits. Let it all go. I know it’s easier said than done but that doesn’t mean it’s not doable. You can do hard things and you probably have already tried to make
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many of these changes with little to no success. Here’s a quick tip to help you get to the finish line this time. It’s simple. Get help! Hire a life coach, find a therapist and/or connect with a supportive sisterhood that wants to see you win. Here’s why. You know what you know. You know what you don’t know. But you don’t know what you don’t know and that’s where the breakthrough is. Having someone to show you new ways, better ways, and
faster ways to get results is a game changer. Making life changes alone makes the journey harder and longer than it needs to be. So, if you want to declutter your life before the new year and keep it clutter free moving forward, ask for help. It’s the most empowering decision you can make when the work isn’t working. Learn more ways to declutter your life at www.clutterfreesociety.com
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Taking Center Stage with Mom, Grandma, Sister, Niece, Author, Keynote Speaker, Life, Career, & Business Coach,
MARISSA L. BLOEDOORN, M.Sc., DTM CEO TCS Consulting LLC & Editor in Chief “OWN It!” Magazine There is nothing more empowering than strengthening the leader within through selfawareness, self-development and self-mastery. I believe we are all leaders. We first lead ourselves and then we lead others whether knowingly or unknowingly. Whether you hold a formal paid leadership position or serve as a volunteer in an informal leadership role. Knowing, understanding, and refining your leadership style will ensure you are consistently successful when serving yourself and others. The book and my coaching program were designed for those who have a desire to learn and grow through self-awareness and self-development. One of the most T.C.S. CONSULTING LLC PRESENTS LASER-FOCUSED COACHING FOR THE SERIOUS PROFESSIONAL important skills and mindsets required to command your life and your business is that of leadership. Leaders who are visionary, empathetic, great listeners, selfmotivated, and driven are more fulfilled in life and satisfied with life when they are doing what they love. These individuals don’t stop with an idea or dream these individuals devise detailed strategies, are intentional and they take the repeated actions required to see those ideas, those dreams become their reality.
You Are the CEO of Your Life... Take
CENTER Stage & OWN IT!
CEO Life.
You are the CEO of Your Life!
It’s Time to Make Some Executive Decisions
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You’re safe here. Deborah’s Place is a nonprofit for battered women and children. We offer the following services: ❖ Rental assistance ❖ Educational assistance ❖ Food vouchers and clothing vouchers ❖ Job Readiness & Customer Service Training
OUR MISSION “He sent his word, and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.” -Psalm 107:20 (kjv) Deborah’s Place and our associated programs seek to prevent domestic and sexual violence by advocating for positive changes in the societal systems that may lead to oppression, fostering a better understanding of domestic and sexual violence through community education, and providing culturally relevant direct services that empower victims of abuse and their children.
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SHARRON JAMISON experiences. They were not gifts, or at least that is what I thought. But I learned that as we evolve, we will experience many good-byes. We will experience many beginnings and endings. We will go through many births and deaths because life is a series of starts and stops. It is a process of learning, unlearning, and relearning. It is a journey of forming, norming, performing, and if you are intentional, transforming. Life is full of transitions.
SHARRON JAMISON Don't Let What Birthed You Yesterday Become Your Bondage Today (Chapter 68) As 2021 comes to a close, SharRon wanted to share a message to help you prepare for the New Year!
"Baby, good-bye is a gift.” I didn’t understand what Mother Bea meant when she told me that years ago. Good-bye and gift in the same sentence? That perspective was hard for me to grasp because all of my “good-byes'' had been tear-jerking, nose-sniffling, gut-wrenching
But there comes a time in life when the people, places, and perspectives that birthed your new consciousness, your new sense of self, and your new clarity, will no longer be places of growth. Those initial birthing places that gave you life, love, and liberty will become places of oppression, suppression, and repression. If you stay too long, those places will become sources of bondage and will impede your ongoing evolution, elevation, and experimentation. Those places are not bad; they are just no longer for you. They are no longer purposeful for your development, calling, and your path. And, if you stay in those outgrown, confining places, you will forfeit your dreams, desires, and destiny. So, what can you do? You say thank you. Thank those people who were instrumental in shaping who you are today. Thank those philosophies that helped you challenge convention,
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SHARRON JAMISON – Cont’d eradicate old paradigms, and question your old narratives. Thank those places that served as sanctuaries for your wounded soul. Lovingly, you say thank you with all the gratitude that your heart, mind, and soul can muster. Then, you MUST say goodbye. Maybe not goodbye forever, but goodbye for now
because your journey continues and so should you. Tell the old you, goodbye.
It’s time to Soar! The book can be purchased at
www.DecidingtoSoar.com
SharRon Jamison, MBA Life Coach/ Author/Speaker 1-877-296-4732 • SharRon@sharronjamison.com • The Jamison Group, LLC • www.sharronjamison.com • My Newest Free E-book-http://bit.ly/Cantheyclimbwithyou
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Who Am I?
Written by Karen KJ Johnson For many years, society has influenced our way of thinking about what’s popular and what’s not. It’s been grained and etched in our minds the “perfect” way you should look, behave & exist. We have been influenced to be someone we are not in order to fit in. One of the most frequently asked question today is “Who is [insert your name]?” The response is often a list of roles and hats you wear as a female. “Oh, first and foremost, I’m a child of God, I’m a wife, mother, sister, daughter”. “I’m the CEO of my company or
I’m the VP of Sales”, etc. So many times, you identify yourself with the many roles and/or hats you wear, but never tell the listening audience who you are; who you are at the essence of your core; who you are BEFORE any of your titles, hats or roles. You are so much more! It is my honor and pleasure to introduce you to real YOU! You are a Warrior: You wear the whole armor of God. You are equipped with everything you need. You are stronger than you believe. You have greater powers than you know. You are a Warrior! You are an Overcomer: No matter what life throws at you. No matter the level of difficulty, because of who lives on the inside…you can stand firm and conquer. You are an Overcomer!
You are a Masterpiece: God spoke EVERYTHING into existence, but you, He created in His image & likeness. You are
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the crown to man’s head. You are a Masterpiece! You are Anointed: You are appointed & positioned for such a time as this. Your love, support & wisdom puts everything into alignment. Everything connected to you, everything you touch, prospers. You are Anointed! You are a Nubian queen: You are of a royal priesthood. You are a
giver of life. You build nations. You are highly intell igent and when man looks upon you, he’s stricken with your beauty. You girl, rocks & rules. You are a Nubian queen! So, rise and stand tall and let the world know you are a Proverb 31 W.O.M.A.N.! It’s your power! It’s your strength! When you recognize who you truly are…watch the game change!
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Introducing
Teresa Perkins We create chic and sophisticated interiors for all spaces Home Décor Interior Design Stagging Soy Scented Candles & More
CONNECT WITH US
LaYerzInteriors.com info@LaYerzInteriors.com
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972-674-8888
Teresa Perkins
www.LaYerzInteriors.com/products-services
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My name is Keandra Ward and I'm the Founder and President of Keystone Business Institute. KBI was birth out of my two loves; my love for entrepreneurship and my love for education. We're excited to bring our combined knowledge of over 30 plus years of business and corporate knowledge. My heart’s desire is to see every student excel in life and in business. We believe in you and we're ready to help you bring your vision to life. Keandra Ward, President
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