LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
s nthesis
INSIDE THIS WEEK'S ISSUE
IMMACULATE INFECTION
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COMICAL RUMINATIONS
06
PUTA FORK IN IT
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HIGH SCHOOL DO-GOODER If you're over hearing bad news all the time, we've got just the right thing to send your heart soaring with pride. Our local high schoolers are expanding their horizons, using the strength of our community support to take global action and make the world a better place. Synthesis profiles Nimrat Mann, a senior at Pleasant Valley High School and future leader.
Sara Calvosa sara@synthesis.net
MAKE ROOM FOR DANNY
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WHY ARE YOU SMILING?
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LIKE, LITERALLY
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GOOD GRUB Jen Cartier heads out to the new GRUB farm to find out why they moved and how their recent developments are going to benefit the community. For those of you expecting a hippie fight, we're sorry to disappoint. Check out all Jen's info and get ready to sign up for CSA boxes this season! You may even get a chance to pick your own peppers.
The Sierra Nevada Shortline Railroad Dream I've been spending a lot of time thinking about rail transportation. Well, not really a LOT of time, but I think about it every time I leave town. I'm constantly wondering why we don't have some form of public transit to the Bay Area from Chico. The only chooch that leaves from downtown is at some butt-crackingly hideous hour right after the bars close, and just before the sofa fires goes out. We have a train station. We have train tracks. All I need is a train. Where can I get my hands on a used train? I need the front engine train, then the middle passenger part, and obviously a caboose. Because ... caboose. I would trick out my choo-choo train with Wi-Fi, comfy seats, and plenty of Scandinavian style. It would run up and down the I-5 corridor from Redding to Sacramento, where passengers could hop off and on to public transit towards the Bay Area or the Sacramento interior. In the mornings there would be lovely, local pastries and awesome coffee from Empire or Naked Lounge for commuters to nosh as they crack open their laptops and jump-start the day. On the way home, the caboose would be cracking with Sierra Nevada on tap and happy hour snickety snacks. Finally, everyone arrives home feeling refreshed, having sloughed off the stress of the day on the commute home. Look for my Kickstarter campaign, wherein I shall venture to purchase my own commuter train. If doing it legally doesn't work out, I'm also open to riding a stolen Columbian Steamer all the way to Chico, taking my chances with the federales and Amtrak Executives. The Ryan Montbleau Band This is where I say nothing more than "you missed out, man!" One of my favorite bands came to town Wednesday, February 13th. Opening for Greensky Bluegrass or some such hillbilly nonsense, The Ryan Montbleau Band from Boston killed it with their bluesy, catchy, and danceable jams. Check out ryanmontbleauband.com for a listen so that the next time these guys come to town you're red-ta-go.
syn.the.sis MONKEY BUSINESS Darkness falls! If you've been wondering where all the 70s metal has been lately, Synthesis has the answer. Apparently the gloomy skies of Portland, Oregon have provided the perfect breeding ground for the insidious sounds of Ape Machine. Check out a sneak peak into the terrifying world of this week's featured band and prepare yourself for the mayhem they're bringing to Cafe Coda.
The composition or combination of parts or elements so as to form a whole b: the production of a substance by the union of chemical elements, groups, or simpler compounds or by the degradation of a complex compound c : the combining of often diverse conceptions into a coherent whole; also : the complex so formed
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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Nim Mann and Rawanda
syn thesis
Learned a thing or two about our local humanitarian'? Now pair that with some good old-fashioned Almanac facts about Rwanda for this week's crossword.
For 19 years The Synthes1S goal has remained to provide a forum for entertainment, music, humor, community awareness, opinions, and change.
PUBLISHER Kathy Barrett kathy@synmedia.net
MANAGING EDITOR Sara Calvosa editorial@synthesis .net
EDITOR Nolan Ford nolan@synthesis .net
DESIGNERS Michaela Warthen Paige Cloke Tanner Ulsh graphics@synthesis.net
DELIVERIES Joey Murphy Molly Roberts
CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Arielle Mullen, Bob Howard, Bryan Lex, Danny Cohen, David Neuschatz, Dillon Carroll, Evan Billman, Guy Starvist, Howl, Jack Knight, Jen Cartier, Josie Hall, Jeremy Gerrard, Kenneth Kelly, Koz McKev, Ky Junkins, Matt Olson, Molly Lex, Ryan Hawkley, Steve Swim, Tommy Diestel
PHOTOGRAPHY Jessica Sid Vincent Latham
CALENDAR Bethany Johnson calendar@synthesis.net
NERD DOWN
Dain Sandoval dain@synthesis .net
2. Chico's Mayor, Mary _ _ __
ACCOUNTING
5. Extinct volcano that serves as
3. Service organization sponsored
DIRECTOR OF OPERATIONS
border between Rwanda, DRC, and Uganda
by Rotary International
Karen Potter
4. Began roller-figure skating at age
OWNER
ACROSS 1. Capital City of Rwanda
Ben Kirby
7. Percentage of Rwanda's
parliament that are women 8. Rwandan tourism is centered
around tracking mountain 11. Sold by Mann as a fundraiser 14. First Lady of Rwanda, Jeannette
Affordable menus. Exceptional taste. We can't wait to serve you!
15. Recently returned from a trip to 16. Mann is currently ranked
____ in her sport
6. Rwanda gained independence from in July 1, 1962 8. Mann is the District ____ oflnteract 9. Her parents emigrated from 10. Mann would like to attend ____ University 12. Giving one can provide a child with an education 13. _ _ _ _ Africa Foundation
Eat. Drink. Be Merry. Locally. phone: 530.222.4895
facebook.com/blushcatering
MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
Word Search created by Bethany Johnson
Bill Fishkin bill@synthesis .net The Synthesis is both owned and published by Apartment 8 Productions. All things published in these pages are the property of Apartment 8 Productions and may not be reproduced, copied or used in any other way, shape or form without the written consent of Apartment 8 Productions. One copy (maybe two) of the Synthesis is available free to residents in Butte, Tehama and Shasta counties. Anyone caught removing papers will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law (and our law!). All opinions expressed throughout the Synthesis are those of the author and are not necessarily the same opinions as Apartment 8 Productions and the Synthesis. The Synthesis welcomes, wants, and will even desperately beg for letters because we care what you think. We can be reached via snail mail at the Synthesis, 210 W. 6th St., Chico, California, 95928. Email letters@synthesis.net. Please sign all of your letters with your real name, address and preferably a phone number. We may also edit your submission for content and space.
210 West 6th Street Chico Ca 95928 530.899.7708 lnfo@synthesls.net
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IMMACULATE INFECTION Bob Howard madbob@madbob.com
Symphony of Frogs Cool, Cool Water... The first week of daylight savings is under our belt and I am We envy Portland for their water; they envy us for our burritos, about to collapse in a puddle of my own sweat, grime, and drool. and the sunlight. The sunshine for six to eight months out of the Spring is beautiful, I get that. Everyone is raving about the warm weather and marveling at the blooming flowers, but what I see year means we have to pump our water out of the ground and send it through ditches and tubes until it gets where are plants that need water we need it to go. I'm telling you, I hit the score of and grass that needs cutting. "Around sunset, the the year with all the %-inch tubing I've been picking Frankly, I think we were cheated out of winter. IQ up the last couple of weeks. So far I've hauled three frogs breeding in the take another six months of pick-up truck loads of the stuff - three more and neighbor's swimming the gray and the rain. If this I think I'll just about have it all. A couple hundred pool cover generate an bucks worth of fittings and I will have water flowing keeps up I might consider moving up to Portland. incredible cacophony - a to every nook and cranny of this property. This has always been part of "the plan;' but the early score high-pitched, tweeting Speaking of Portland, I just of the irrigation line means the timeline has been symphony." got off the phone with the moved up, considerably. guys from the band Ape Anyway, in spite of the early onset of yard-work, it is an Machine. They are a four-piece band out of the great Northwest that specializes in delivering driving, old-school metal; the admittedly gorgeous time of year. Around sunset, the frogs breeding in the neighbor's swimming pool cover generate an good stuff, unfiltered. The band will be rocking Cafe Coda this Thursday - check out the interview for more. incredible cacophony - a high-pitched, tweeting symphony. Daylight reveals the fruit trees braking dormancy, leaves and
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blossoms bursting forth from wood. Seedlings are pushing through the rich, dark soil; the grass is green, lush, and seems to grow about an inch an hour. The End of Sobriety As We Know It Hey, speaking of green, if you're reading this, it means you've survived Saint Patrick's Day! Congratulations! That's no small feat. That being said, your reading this column doesn't necessarily mean I survived it, deadline was last week. IfI am around, it means I made it through not only SPD, but also another year on this crazy, spinning ball of molten metals. The whole thing is so unlikely it makes my head wobble and my ears ring. Thank God, gods, or no God that I'm drinking again; it might get confusing without the occasional snort of strong hooch.
MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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COMICAL RUMINATIONS Zooey Mae zooeymae@synthesis.net
Goodbye, Testicles I did not do well with the whole "spring forward" thing. This was evidenced by the three-day mega-funk I found myself in, complete with angry naps and panic attacks. Yesterday when my alarm woke me up, I was too tired to open my eyes and turn it off, so I just threw my phone (I set my alarm on my phone because I am a product of my generation) under my comforter at the foot of the bed to stifle the sound of pan flutes, or whatever the shit that stupid noise is supposed to be. Later that same day, I caught my reflection in a window and realized that I must have had sleep crust in both my stupid eyes when trying to apply makeup. I looked like I'd channeled myself as a pilgrim in the third grade Thanksgiving play, with overdone blue eye shadow (I didn't even know I owned blue eye shadow) and two bright-pink circles on my cheeks. I haven't been in elementary school for almost two decades so I'm out of the loop, but is that makeup formula still being used by moms at school plays? My favorite part about it was that they weren't discriminatory. If there was a kid in the play - boy, girl, whatever - they were getting that combination of makeup on them. I have some really amazing pictures somewhere of my older brother at seven years old playing Tiny Tim. He had a mullet and the bluest eyelids you've ever seen. I should find those ...
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Speaking of odd beauty regimens, Wrangler the people who brought you the jeans that make your ass look three feet long - is releasing a line of "moisturizing jeans for ladies." According to the Vogue website, "the Denim Spa jeans ($85 $135) comes in three finishes: Aloe Vera, Olive Extract and Smooth Legs, which aims to prevent cellulite ... the effects of the ingredients last up to 15 days, but a reload spray will also be available to buy - meaning that the formula lasts between 67 and 95 wears." I don't know about you guys, but I think I'll just keep lubing up with canola oil and wrapping my legs in plastic wrap before I put my jeans on. Yes, I may have pools of sweat in my shoes by the end of the day, and there's a weird crinkly noise whenever I walk, but boy oh boy is my skin soft every night. Not to be outdone by women's fashion, there's a current Kickstarter campaign to create "Snowballs" - underwear for men with an integrated pocket for shaped cooling pads. Turns out heat is bad for testicles (if you're actually trying to produce offspring, that is), which is why balls hang - to keep them away from the sweat factory AKA your body. They're at $3,100 of their $20,000 goal with only 22 days to go, so if you're one of those weirdos who actually want kids, hop on over to the Snowballs Kickstarter page and throw down some money. adventuresinafairyhouse. wordpress
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PUT A FORK IN IT Jen Cartier blu shcatering@gmai l. com
Tilling The Ground Several members of my family have recently encountered some serious health concerns. I have therefore been on a bit of an emotional roller coaster; riding high with gratitude for each moment, but dipping down at times to that very basic, childish feeling when something we love is in danger of being taken: this is simply not fair.
I was walking in my garden yesterday at dusk, picking up baseball gloves the kids left out, still sweaty from the three one-on-one soccer games I had played (one for each kid - you know, it's gotta be fair), admiring the work we've accomplished on "La Petite Ferme;' when I started to think about life and death, and oddly, sustainability.
For some reason, I grew up especially afraid of our human mortality. When I was 12, my CD player did some weird thing on the display panel. Something that looked like an ink splotch showed up where the numbers displayed the track- a splotch in a shape that looked a little like an island and a palm tree to my adolescent mind.
It's a bummer that we have to think cognitively about sustainability, and that companies like Seventh Generation have to emblazon their mission on their label. The most important things I've learned about sustainability came from loving people who did good things, and I'm inspired to carry on their legacy; to teach others what they taught me about things that are understood somewhere cellular; in my marrow.
When my mom remarried and told me she was going to Hawaii for her honeymoon, I was convinced the palm tree ink splotch in my CD player's display was some kind of omen that she would die on her trip (I mean, airplane rides over the whole goddamn ocean can't be safe). Ia have to live with my dad, his wife, and stepchildren. My dad would try to help me with my ponytails, but girls at school would make fun of how bad they looked. m be forever uncool without my mom. But she didn't die. And I didn't die either. Actually, I grew up with one set of greatgrandparents, and another great grandma still around until I was in my early 20s. My parents' parents are still with us today. I have been lucky.
I love growing things because my grandparents showed me the beauty that came with getting their hands dirty. The Guzzetti family, who have taken in my lovely and crazy little tribe, have taught me another, beautiful view of family life - one of redemption. They've given me a place to go, where my liberal views, sailor's mouth, and love for food are not only appreciated but shared, and our common bond is love for one another, along with the understanding that somehow we're all beautiful and, simultaneously, fucked. We may not last forever, but our imprint truly will. Even when our names are no longer remembered and our lives are tilled back into the ground. Love on.
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'Jfie,
fJf AWESOME generations after that. It's a ripple effect," explained Mann. With so much attention being directed at all the potential yardbirds in college town, it's easy to become caught up "Just giving a child a uniform that costs $20 so that they can go and attend the school, just giving them that one in the hand-wringing, fretting, and negativity. But shield your eyes, because like a blinding beacon of hopeful, shiny necessity, it's their ticket into school. The education is free, but the uniteenage light, Nimrat Mann is commanding atform is what can tention from all corners sometimes be a deterrent:' of the world. Back from a recent trip to Rwanda, Mary Goloff's she's getting ready for college and trying to find Mustard Sends A Girl To Rwanda the path that will give her the best opportuMann became involved with nity to be the change she wants to see in the world. AfriPeace in junior high and continued her Nim is a Chico native and a senior at Pleasant involvement in Valley High School. Her high school when parents emigrated from an opportunity India before she was to go to Rwanda born, and fostered in presented itself. "Without the help her a deep connection to of the Chico comIndia and the rest of the world. She credits her munity, I wouldn't have made it to parents with helping her appreciate international Rwanda. I sold cultures while fostermustard all of last year at the farmer's ing a global consciousness. She's been able to market. You know hone her penchant for the mayor, Mary Goloff? She dointernational do-gooding through various service nated thousands club pathways, including of jars of mustard. Interact - a service club Yeah, she makes mustard;' said sponsored by Rotary International for kids 12 to 18 years old. Mann with a laugh. Mann raised $5,000 for the monthlong peace ambassador mission to Rwanda - that's a lot of Junior Rotarians mustard. Mann is the District Governor of Interact and oversees While she was in Rwanda, she worked with students and 70 clubs from the northernmost school in California all the way down to San Ramon. Interact is the kid version had the chance to hear their stories and bear witness to of Rotary Club. Mann's district has partnered with Asante the post-genocidal recovery. She also studied their local government by attending, speaking, and interacting with Africa Foundation and is currently in fundraising mode. their parliament. Mann detailed her experience, "What I Asante Africa is an organization dedicated to providing resources and education in Tanzania and Kenya. "You observed in Rwanda, though they are one of the poorest can educate a woman, and she educates her children and African Nations, is that their corruption level is probably
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
"You can educate a woman and she educates her children and generations after that. It's a ripple effect." one of the least. In East Africa they're making a movement to really empower women:' Next-door is the Democratic Republic of Congo, a kleptocracy where corruption is rampant, a stark contrast to the rapidly recovering Rwanda. "In a lot of African nations that are just going through the industrial revolution right now, it's been found that if the women have a strong role in their society and the government empowers women, the country is just much more stable;' said Mann.
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The Women That Inspire The Inspiring "Not to sound like a cliche, but definitely my mom is inspiring to me;' said Mann. "My parents emigrated here from India, and I was born about a year after they came from New York. My parents had to completely switch professions. My Mom had a Phd in India, and my parents started from scratch when they got here and went back to school. My Mom went to nursing school when I was four or five. My mom also had my brother and sister while she was in nursing school, and she graduated as Valedictorian at Chico State." Mann concluded, "Seeing my mom as such a strong woman in my own family has inspired me. There are so many strong women in my family:'
Other than her supermom, Mann is inspired by the First Lady of Rwanda - Jeannette Kagame. "She's trying to really empower sub-Saharan African Women," in-
sisted Mann. "She's right there, like as a co-president with her husband. To see how an African woman is doing that in a patriarchal society is really great." Going In Front Of The Rwandan Parliament 40% of Rwanda's parliament is made up of women, one of the largest ratios of any government organization. To what purpose would our fearless, future leader be addressing this parliament? Mann answered, "Just to be able to be inquisitive and ask questions, to learn about post-genocidal recovery. We learned about how they were able to recover so quickly. The genocide happened in 1994, and here we are in 2013 and you can't even really tell, they've recovered so quickly. The Rwandan people, without any support or real industries to sustain them? They had to have a really good plan:'
being as animated as possible, or talking to somebody as esteemed as a parliament member. I think that's what skating has done for me;' expressed Mann. Mann's college plans are still taking shape. She's been accepted to Cal and USC, but she's set her sights on Yale. Our roller-skating humanitarian is also a philosopher. "In the future I plan on pursuing medicine, maybe through Partners In Health or the World Health Organization;' she said. "I know I keep saying that education is the most important thing, but when I take a step back, I think medicine may be the most important thing. Not necessarily the access to medicine, but the ability to use it as a way to negotiate. I see myself working behind the scenes in public health or global health:' Mann knows she might be idealistic with her youthful energy and seemingly innate wisdom, but insists that a positive outlook is essential to change. "I hear the firsthand accounts of the extraordinary things that people are able to do because of tools like education and medicine. It's reassuring. You have to be hopeful!"
The Michelle Kwan Of Rollerskating So what does our girl like to do for fun? 'Tm a figure skater on roller skates. I'm ranked #3 in the country right now;' said Mann. She's been roller-figure skating since she was three years old. Aside from being full of roller-win, her experience with roller-figure skating has definitely contributed to Mann's self-confidence. Roller-figure skating by nature is a spectator sport, and being able to let go and skate confidently has translated into her everyday life. "At this point for me it's no problem being in front of my peers and
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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Visiting the GRUB Cooperative will take you out Dayton Road past a strawberry farm and down a long driveway where you're likely to witness Ron Toppi repairing bikes, some kids playing, and/or adults working in the fields, greenhouses, and tending plant starts.
was time to take the original vision to the next logical step. "How often do people get a do-over five years into their original business model?" said Shaw, "[This transition] is an incredible opportunity:' By moving the GRUB CSA farm to its new location at 3197
It's a place where people gather, and a place that has become known for the lovely vegetables they grow, the fun events they hold, and for their decsion to allow schools educational access to farming. It's like a magical little commune with a strong vision for the future, and many hands working together to make it all happen. So why change? The original GRUB Co-op was given a five-year lease on their Dayton Rd. property, where they successfully farmed three-and-a-half acres, built up a Community Supported Agriculture program, and made a name for themselves in a city where sustainability has become not only an important issue, but a feasible reality to the extent that our community members choose it.
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W. Sacramento Ave, the new for-profit farm will allow the
farm to be consolidated into one parcel, and be ready for growth with ten acres of usable space. With all the time and expense to "put roots down'' on a property, the three partners who have invested them selves in the new CSA farm wanted to be sure they did so wisely. According to Shaw, the new property has "historically been a place where food and community intersect:' The Canfield family, who purchased the land from John Bidwell, used the space as a chicken farm, a melon patch in the summer, and a pumpkin patch in the fall. Community mem bers could visit the farm, and gather its bounty as it ripened on the vines. For Shaw, this property feels like a "natural fit:' He noted that he appreciates the beauty of the property, and its close proximity to downtown.
GRUB began as a non-profit organization, but over time the need to develop the CSA farm as a separate, for-profit business, became apparent. The farm needed more space to keep up with demand. The Dayton Rd. property afforded usable space, but another acre-and-a-half in Riparia was needed to supplement the three-and-a-half acres they were already farming. Splitting the farm up this way proved a bit difficult to maintain.
When Callender arrived, he conveyed his excitement over having land that is "fundamentally our own, with long-term security:' Callender also said they'll be able to farm more sustainably, efficiently, and with more crop cover and rotation. "The new land will also be more functional and aesthetically pleasing;' he said, because the new layout will allow CSA members easy viewing of the crops, and will possibly allow the opportunity to participate in u-pick programs, where members of the CSA can harvest food themselves.
When the property owner at Dayton Rd. refused to renew a long-term lease, and after much deliberation, Francine Stuelpnagel, Michael Shaw, and Lee Callender decided it
As for how the move has been for Callender? "It has been awesome, and challenging;' he said, "I mean, shit, Franny gives birth next week:'
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We all laughed a little as we congratulated Callender on his second child with his lovely wife, Stuelpnagel, who was one of the original founders of the GRUB Cooperative. As a student of the CSU Chico sustainability department, she spearheaded the vision of bringing a community-minded farming method to Chico. And we're so glad she did. Her efforts, and the efforts of others, have brought beautiful produce to the GRUB booth at local farmer's markets and the CSA program. Furthermore, the youthful energy and sustainable mindset of its members have made GRUB an integral part of our agricultural community. While the GRUB CSA Farm makes its move over to Sacramento Ave, the GRUB Co-op will continue to function at the Dayton Rd. property. Youth education programs will continue. Schools like Blue Oak visit the Co-op farm for field trips where students get the opportunity to get their hands in the dirt, weed asparagus rows, and harvest beets while learning about sustainable growing practices, seasons, and maybe a little about life, too. The GRUB Co-op on Dayton Rd. remains one of the only places in the area where you can find organic plant starts for your home garden, lovingly tended by Sherri Scott who also hosts seed swaps. The GRUB Education Program also works with the grant-funded Cultivating Com munity Project to bring information about urban farming, assistance in creating community gardens, and more. Visit www.cultivatingcommunitynv.org and www.grubchico.org for more information.
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All 16 oz Teas or AMF 53 All Day
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OPEN MIC -ACOUSTIC
BURGER MADNESS! Bear Burger with fries or salad for 55.29. llam-!Opm.
MUG NIGHT 7-IUO 40oz beer 52.50 or 53 53 Fireball Shot 55 Gentleman Jack Shot
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DANCE HALL 52 Select Beers 53 Teas
off while wearing
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54 Cherry Bourbon Coke 54 Dbl Peach Tea Press 52 Dead Guy Ale
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53 all leas 56 Sky Vodka and Red bull BUCK NIGHT 9PM-Close 51 BEERS 51 WELLS 51 TEAS
52 25 PBR 52.75 Well & Dom. All day - Every day 510 BOTILES OF CHAMPAGNE
52 Marqis 53 Cuervo Marqis 52.50 Corona's & Sierra Drafts Mon-Sat 3PM-6PM 51 Dom draft, 52 SN draft, 51.50 wells
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Mon-Sat 3PM-6PM 51 Dom draft, 52 SN draft, 51.50 wells, Power Hour 8-9PM 1/2 off Liquor & Drafts 9-Close 53 Skyy Cocktails & Pale Ale Drafts 59.75 Pale Pitchers
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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WEDNESDAY, MARCH
2QTH
FRIDAY, MARCH
22N°
Stolas, Monk Warrior, and Star Thistle Wall
Kids and Creeks Spring Benefit Concert
LA SALLE'S Frog-rockers from Las Vegas, Redding, and Chico will all converge this Wednesday at La Salle's for a night of busted guts and melted faces. The touring act, Stolas, combines hardcore vocals with an onslaught of dualguitar riffs, creating a sonic adrenaline rush worth checking out before they leave to lay waste to some other unsuspecting city. Monk Warrior will be repping the Redding scene with some instrumental experimentation, and Star Thistle Wall are the local young guns with a brand new album coming soon. 9PM. $3. 21 +
CHICO WOMEN'S CLUB Come to this show and ensure that more kids are proficient at handling reptilian creatures in the wilderness. But seriously, all proceeds will go to benefit the local non-profit, Kids and Creeks, whose mission is to provide children with the opportunity to experience and develop appreciation for the natural world. Donating their musical services for this great cause are Thrive, Soul Union, The Moe's Family Band, and some special guests from the Chico School of Rock. Listen to music and save the world at the same time. 6:30PM. Allages. $10 advance. $15 at the door.
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TOWKli IsOUKGli
The Return of
DiveBar Disco RETRO FUTURE
18MONDAY The Bear: Bear-E-oke! 9PM. Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour with Carey Robinson Trio. 5-7PM. DownLo: Pool League - 3 player teams, sign up with bartender. 7PM. Last Call Lounge: Karaoke. 8PM. Maltese: Open Mic Night Acoustic. Signups @ 8, Starts @ 9. Mug Night 7-l 1:30PM. Sierra Nevada Big Room: Happy belated St. Patrick's Day with Dervish! 7:30PM. $20. Woodstock's: Spelling Bee For the Grown Ups. 6:30-7:30PM.
19TUESDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Dreamwork Circle - Share dreams & explore techniques for discovering their secrets. 6:30-8PM. $10. The Bear: Bear Wear! 1/2 off while wearing Bear Wear. Mug Club 4-lOPM. Cafe Flo: Open Mic with Aaron. 7-9PM. Crazy Horse Saloon: Allrequest karaoke. 21 +.
DownLo: Game night with DJ DannyK. 7PM LaSalle's: '90's Night. 21 +. Maltese: Karaoke 9PM-Close. Studio Inn Lounge: Karaoke 8:30PM-1AM. The Tackle Box: Karaoke 9PM. Woodstock's: Trivia Challenge. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 6:30 PM.
20WEDNESDAY 1OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Open Mic. Singers, songwriters, musicians, vocalists and comedians. All ages welcome. 7PM. 1078 Gallery: Live music with Wahid. Doors 7:30PM, Show 8PM. $10. The Bear: Trike Races. Wintshirts and Bear Bucks. Post time lOPM. Mug club 4-lOPM. Cafe Flo: Jazz Happy Hour with Carey Robinson Trio. Crazy Horse Saloon: Wild dance lessons, mechanical bull, Crazy Horse Girls, DJ Hot Rod Ent. 8-lOPM. Chico Women's Club: West African Dance with Imelda Mata. Live drumming. 5:30-7PM. $10.
Chico Women's Club: Ecstatic Dance. Live music played by the TranceFormation Band. 7: 15-8:30. DownLo: 8Ball Tournament. Signups 6PM, Starts 7PM. Duffy's: Dance night! DJ Spenny and Jeff Howse. 9PM. Feather Falls Casino: Dance Club. Dress to impress! 9:30PM. $5 cover includes one drink. LaSalle's: Stolas, Monk Warrior, & Star Thistle Wall. 9PM. $3. Maltese: Smashed Spelling Bee. 9PM. Tackle Box: Beginner Swing Dancing Lessons. 7-9PM. Towne Lounge: Black Fong. 9PM. VIP Ultra Lounge (Inside The Beach): Laurie Dana. 7-9PM. Woodstock's: Trivia Night plus Happy Hour. Call @ 4PM on date to reserve a table. 8PM.
21 THURSDAY Cafe Coda: Death Star Pilots, Ape Machine, Been Obscene. 8PM. $5. Cafe Flo: Improv Jam - Workshop with Michael 5-7PM.
DownLo: Chico Jazz Collective every Thursday. 8PM. Gold Country Casino: Studio One DanceFest; 4-day dance festival ft. classes in various dance styles and social dancing all night. See www.sldancefest. com. 7PM. Graduate: Red Bull Movie Night. lOPM. Grana: John Seid- Live Jazz. 5:30-8:30PM. Has Beans: Open Mic Night. 7-lOPM. Sign-ups start@ 6PM. Johnnie's (Hotel Diamond): Low Flying Birds. 6:30-9:30PM. FREE. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM. LaSalle's: Happy Hour: Black Fong. 6-9PM. No cover. Lost On Main: The Dancehall Ft: Fantan Mojah & Xsample. 9PM. Maltese: Karaoke 9PM-Close. Monstro's: Violation (Rosa punk), Hellbomber, The Oisters. 8PM. $5. Panama's: Eclectic NightsBuck Night & DJ Eclectic spinning favorites of today and yesterday on the patio. 9PM.
Ultimate Decade 11111111111 CLUBD l DancePartv DJ Set/Hosted bV JPEG - 9pm
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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FRI & SAT, MARCH 15rH - 16rH
THURS. - SUN. MARCH 21sr_24rH
The Accordion
Babes DUFFY'S TAVERN The Accordion Babes are lead by Amber Lee Baker, a full-time musician from San Francisco with a soft spot for the soothing sounds of the squeezebox. As it turns out, there's quite a conglomeration of other female accordion players in the Bay, and they've all decided to descend upon Chico at once! Go online and check out the group, Whiskey and Women, to fully prepare for the barrage of babes that await you this Sunday. The show starts a little early at 5:30PM, costs $5, and welcomes anyone above the age of 21.
Studio
One
DANCes:esT
Studio One Dance Fest GOLD COUNTRY CASINO
Waltz Salsa Cha Cha Rhumba
Lindy Hop NY Hustle Night Club Argentine Tango West Coast Swing
Shuffle, swing, hustle, or glide your way down to the Gold Country Casino this weekend for classes, social dancing, competitions, and shows in a zesty mix of dance styles. From West Coast to Ballroom to Latin, there is sure to be a style for everyone. There will even be hip hop classes from G Madison IV, who has been featured in many films, television shows, and music videos. A pass for the hip hop workshop is $35 ($30 for students) and $100 for the full event ($75 for students). Dancing commences at 7PM Thursday, lOAM Friday, and 9AM Saturday/Sunday. 18+
DIVA WENDY'S SO's DANCE PARTY Every Friday starting March 15rn 9PM - lAM No Cover DJ RICK "O" Dress up SO's Style Special prizes for Wendy's choice male I female
• ••• • ••• ••• • ••• • ••• • ••• ••• • ••• • •• • ••• • ••• • ••• • •• • ••• • ••• Quackers: Karaoke Night with Andy. 9PM-1AM. Towne Lounge: Dive Bar Disco with DJ 2K. 9PM. $1 VIP Ultra Lounge: Acoustic Performance w/ Bradley Relf. 7-9PM.
22 FRIDAY 1OOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Writing Group - Write, & share. 3:30-5PM. The Beach: DJ 2K & Mack Morris. 9PM-close. $2, $10 VIP. Cafe Coda: Jimmy Grant's Birthday Show w/ Jimmy Grant Quartet & Mood: Swing. SPM. $10. Chico Women's Club: Kids and Creeks Spring Benefit Concert - Musical performances by Thrive, Soul Union, The Moe's Family Band, and special guests from the Chico School of Rock. 6:30M. $20. DownLo: Spay-ghetti & No-Balls - Benefit for PawPrints Thrift's Spay and Neuter Program. Live music, Stand-up comedy, and food. 7-llPM. $5 Duffy's: Pub Scouts. 4-7PM.
Gold Country Casino: Studio One DanceFest; 4-day dance festival featuring classes in various dance styles and social dancing all night long. See www.sldancefest.com for more info. lOAM. Kelly's Tavern (Oroville): Karaoke with Mora Sounds. 7-llPM. LaSalle's: DJ Event. SPM. Lakeview Restaurant (Oroville): Carey Robinson Jazz. 6-9PM. Lost On Main: Fever Fridays DJ with DJ Trazz and guest DJ Freakbeatz. Dress to impress! 9PM. Maltese: Fabulous Friday LGBTQA+ Dance Party. 9PM. Monstro's: Pigs, High Anxiety, TBA. SPM. $5. All ages. Peeking: BassMint - Electronic Dance Party. 9:30PM. $3-5. Quackers: Live DJ. 9PM. T-Bar: Live music 7-8:30PM. Tackle Box: Live music with Buck Ford. 9PM. Tortilla Flats: Latin Nights. Espanol & English DJ dancing with DJ (El, Kora) de Chico.
ARE YOU INTERESTED IN SOCIAL
23SATURDAY lOOth Monkey Cafe & Books: Knitting Circle. 2-4PM. Cafe Coda: Mossy Creek. SPM. Cal Skate: Adults Only Skate Night. 9-11:30PM. $6. 18+ Canyon Oaks: Independent Living Services of Northern California presents 7th Annual Pirate Palooza. Feast, Grog, Dance. Silent auction, Live entertainment, Costume contest, & more. 6-lOPM. $40. DownLo: 9Ball Tournament. Signups noon, starts lPM. Farwood Bar & Grill (Orland): Chuck Epperson & Eric Peter. 8:30-10:30PM. Gold Country Casino: Studio One DanceFest; 4-day dance festival featuring classes in various dance styles and social dancing all night long. See www. sldancefest.com for more info. 9AM. LaSalle's: 1980NOW! SPM. Lost On Main: Lansana plus guests. 9PM. Maltese: Live music with Dreamweapon. 9PM. Quackers: Live DJ. 8:30PMJAM. No cover.
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MEDIA? ARE YOU WELL-VERSED IN FACEBOOK, TWITTER AND PINTEREST? DO YOU LOVE MEMES? WE DO, TOO.
24SUNDAY Crazy Horse Saloon: Sunday Fun day. Duffy's: The Accordion Babes (San Francisco). 5:30PM Gold Country Casino: Studio One DanceFest; 4-day dance festival featuring classes in various dance styles and social dancing. See www.sldancefest. com for more info. 9AM-12AM. LaSalle's: Karaoke. SPM. Maltese: Live Jazz Music. 3PM. The Tackle Box: Karaoke with DJ Shelley. SPM.
We are currently looking for Social Media Interns to assist in client research, updates and more. If you're interested please contact Ashley Shaffer at ashleys@synmedia.net or by calling 530-899-7708. All applicants must provide a resume for this unpaid position.
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State Theater (Oroville): Benefit for The Oroville State Theater with performances by Paradise Symphony Orchestra and special guests from the San Francisco Opera Orchestra. 7PM. $15 General, $10 Stage Members, $5 Student. Tackle Box: Live music with Rockhounds. 9PM. Towne Lounge: ClubOl# Retro Future - Ultimate Decade Dance Party. hosted by DJ JPEG. 9PM.
RESPECT
RespectChico.org MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
ts I
COME FOR THE ROCK. ST A Y FOR THE BURRITOS Serious heavy metal is coming our way. It's heading here in the form of four men, and the name that binds them together, Ape Machine. It is coming in a van - a Ford Econoline named after a hula-hoop expert, Yuri. When I caught up with guitarist, Ian Watts, he was just getting Yuri back from the mechanic's. "They say nothing's wrong with it:' He didn't sound convinced - an ominous introduction to an ominous band.
of their time out on the road. I catch them on day four of the tour. TheyCl just played a show in San Francisco, an early afternoon affair in the Mission District. "It was great;' Watts described. "We got to play with a bunch of really cool bands:'
Ape Machine is a musical time machine; a throwback to the dark and early days of metal when the screaming, bloody demon child was being born, clawing forth from the blackened womb while the flower children, and the beautiful people, watched in horror. The LSD flashbacks, the bad trips, the coalescing marijuana smoke, and the bevy of sexually transmitted diseases - the bad hangover from the Summer of Love - the thorn in the side of the 1960s. Spewing forth from the peace and love was blood, bile, and death, as the nameless and the faceless were being slaughtered overseas in the name of freedom and democracy. The wars reverberate back to our shores; growling, detuned, and stomach-churning.
Their frequent touring takes the band up and down the West Coast, and this particular sojourn cuts a heavy chunk out of the southwest with stops in Arizona and Texas. Watts tells me this will be the band's fourth excursion into the lone star state. They've run into some heavy situations in that wideopen, rough and tumble part of the country. In Arizona they had to back down a biker who was threatening to kill them, claiming theyCl knocked over his motorcycle.
In the 1960s it was Deep Purple, Iron Butterfly, and the progenitors of a musical wash of darkness that would follow in their wake, Black Sabbath. Today, Ape Machine carries forth this imperative, undeniable tradition. The music is raw and pure, grinding the listener into gristle and bone, and sending a furious pulse of ice-water up the spine. Ape Machine hails from the grim, gray northwest of Portland, Oregon, but the band spends a good amount
The band has some affection for New Mexico. They explained: "We're looking forward to getting to New Mexico so we can get some more fireworks, and start blowing stuff up in Texas:' On-stage the band is equally explosive - the shows are fearsome, with the audiences hungry for the droning metal elixir that Ape Machine delivers. The band churns out the heavy riffs for vocalist Caleb Heinze to release his blood-curdling, vocal chants. The rest of the tour takes Ape Machine down the coast, then back up. They'll be hitting our fair city here on Thursday, March 21st, playing at Cafe Coda. They scoff when I suggest the band might be worn out by the time they get here. "We'll just be hitting our peak:' Our conversation drifted toward food. I asked the guys what they tend to eat out on the road. "When we're in California, it's all about the burritos;' they explained. I asked if the burritos in Portland are no good, to which I received an adamant "they suck:' Watts added, "They're
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
just not real burritos:' We continued to marvel over the ability to screw up a food item that is apparently so simple. It's a vintage sound the band is after, and they utilize vintage equipment to get it. Watts scoffed when I ask if they use any digital modeling, or tone sampling, to arrive at that killer ?Os-era, metal sound. He plays his Gibson guitars through a 1974 Orange amplifier. Brian True's bass guitar rumbles through an amplifier built in 1970. Damon De La Paz, the band's hard-hitting drummer, was born in the 1970s. Even the band's name is taken from an old piece of equipment. "Yeah, I have an old 80's mixing board in my studio consul in Portland;' Watts clarified. "The 'T' was rubbed off of the tape machine input;' and a band name was born. The band recently signed to San Ramon, California based Ripple Music, and is enjoying the support of a label that is fully on board with the vision Ape Machine is working towards. A new record is in the works titled, Mangled By The Machine. The album was recorded on two-inch magnetic tape, so I asked Watts if this had something to do with the title. Having done some work with tape in the past, I remember how badly the brown magnetic stuff can get gobbled up by those shiny, spinning wheels. But Watts said no, that the title was drawn from a song lyric. It's in that limbo state; completed, but not duplicated yet, in between recording and pressing. "It will be released in a couple of months;' Watts explained. Of course, it will be on vinyl.
By Bob Howard SYNTHESISWEEKLY.COM
MAKE ROOM FOR DANNY PHOTOS BY JESSICA SID
Danny Cohen
ON THE TOWN
"DANJO...YOU'RE RABID." I cut back on my meds, it's daylight savings. Two smacked out 20-somethings took five minutes to board the bus. The rowdies had me crawling out of my skin. The driver had been 20 minutes down for a year. The "puppet" supervisors backpeddled four times on changing her route. Her relief driver scolded me for being an arbiter of righteousness, blaming low pay and management. The junkies took five minutes to get off (reboarding) and people missed their connections. My Paul Kersey attitude suddenly made sense to the driver, who "agreed wholeheartedly" (Howard Rosin of Highland Springs Resort in Beaumont) that the bus took three times longer to reach Chico than 10 years ago. My agitated brain reeled in the orchards. The identical blossoms were rote. "Green tree ... green tree ... green tree" said Bukowski (his rationale for avoiding the rural). "We're all going to die so why let trivialities get the upper hand," he said, but my nerves took precedence over my mind and it's so-called logic. I cursed the white pickups, loose dobermans, and street-borne tractors. I took my burrito to an outside table, where the clerk nextdoor was on his cellular. I asked why they needed an external speaker for their customers, as it blared cheap rock. "Because it's TOTALLY AWESOME!" chimed his girlfriend, emerging to prove me wrong by hanging there. After furtive whispers, they made out. The buff dude grabbed ass repeatedly. I stared at it in defiance, but he didn't notice. (It resembled withered balloons, filled with oatmeal).
Finally, he mounted his bike and sassed, "Enjoy the music." I heard Max G. Arnold's Aussie-voice saying, "Don't take the bait." I asked who owned the place. "Johnny." "Johnny who?" "Johnny Cash." ''I'll find out!" ''I'll bet you will," he countered with vindictive impertinance. "Go! Get out of here." I pleaded to de-escalate things. "Have fun DYING," he cryptically added. "Wiseass shithead .... fucker!!!!" said my alter-ego. He bailed, but came back twice, like in my song, "Frat Fucks." He wimped out, but I began to interpret his sage advice as a veiled threat. I found three patrol units who were too busy citing a motorist and said, "Call it in." After getting MY stats, they put me on perpetual "hold"; there was a stabbing. Later, they deemed me "complicit." Luckily, I was too timid to ask a merchant to use the phone to yell at the CPD, so I railed against dog <loo, heroin, and late busses to the Downtown Merchant's association. They were all-ears as they were having a meeting that night about indigents. "Whatever you're doing, keep doing it," said May of Reality Records, beaming from ear to ear. When I got home, I turned on Adam 12. The second Darrin Stevens (from Bewitched) had padlocked his suburban garage, so his neighbor couldn't use his half of a boat two weekends in a row. Malloy and Reed returned three times, until Darrin killed the other guy with a fire extinguisher (he had a grappling hook). "He overreacted," said Malloy.
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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SCENE REPORT by David Neuschatz â&#x20AC;˘ photos by Jack Knight
Poor Man's Whiskey Dark Side of the Moonshine Tour March lQth @ Sierra Nevada Big Room
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
When I walked into the Sierra Nevada giftshop on March 9th, I saw a poster that gave me goosebumps: a beam of light passing through a translucent jug, becoming a rainbow. The 17-year-old in me danced for joy, for this meant that I would be able to see world-class bluegrass musicians, Poor Man's Whiskey, bring Pink Floyd's unprecedented album to life the very next day.
Lion? They quickly announced that they were doing two sets, their first being all originals and the second being the main event. Their original tunes were standard, easygoing bluegrass about whiskey, women, and trains. In keeping with their moniker, they mentioned whiskey in just about every song.
After a ten-minute intermission, a costume contest occurred. All who dressed for the occasion I arrived at received a the Big Room free ticket to to find the usual suspects a Big Room Dark Side Of The Moonshine Tour show of their ambling and milling about: that guy with the really weird choosing. Then, the band re-emerged in the garb appropriate for a happening such as beanie-hat thing that dangles to his shoethis. laces, my great aunt's doppelganger, and that group of dreadlocked people who show up For the next 43 minutes, Poor Man's to any show as long as it's not a blues tribute Whiskey put on an amazing bluegrass interconcert. But amidst the horde of Tommy pretation of one of the best progressive rock Bahama shirts there were some very coloralbums of all time. They did all the tracks ful characters adorned in green face paint, justice, and even made a couple all their straw hats, and ruby-red slippers that added own. On the song "Great Gig In The Sky;' some welcomed levity to the atmosphere. they substituted Clare Torry's wordless vocal These Oz-clad characters were referencing for a masterful, face-melting fiddle solo by the synchronicity between the 1939 film The none other than Fiddle Dave - a ringer the Wizard of Oz and Pink Floyd's legendary five-piece borrowed from band leader Josh 1973 album, Brough's brother's band, Midnite Farmers. The Dark Side They changed "Money" to "Whiskey;' addof the Moon. ing their own verses for the most part, and exchanged the cash register intro with the Once Poor Man's Whiskey cheers-ing of Torpedo bottles and repeated took the stage, popping of Pale Ale cans, which they then I was a bit handed out to the crowd. To conclude the evening, the band played an acoustic verconfused by sion of"Wish You Were Here;' with the their humcrowd's full participation. I feel lucky to have drum attire. witnessed this magical, nostalgia-inducing Where was the spectacle, and urge anyone who has the Tin Man or the Cowardly chance to see this in the future to take it.
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Reu1ews-
TWISTED
Twisted Strategies Twisted Strategies LP Self-Released by Tommy Diestel Hot off the presses of Chico's local hip hop scene, it's Twisted Strategies! Lead by frontman, MC Cody G, Twisted Strategies fuses the lyrical power of hip hop with a funky, full live band. Upbeat melodies, groovy tunes, and uplifting lyrics blare from any stereo playing this album. Fun, funky rhythms mixed with positive rhymes paint pictures of societal change, not giving into bullshit, and living free. Usually I'm not the biggest fan of that auto-tune robot voice thing (you know the one), but Twisted Strategies pulls it off with style, and doesn't use it as a crutch. The groovin' organ and soulful keyboard lines make up for it as well. Add in funky bass, choppy guitar, sultry backup vocals, and rippin' syncopated drum beats and I'm sold. I haven't heard such moving music for a while, let alone from hip hop. They're not kidding when they say it: "Oh, so fresh."
Dub Colossus Addis Through The Looking Glass
Real World by Ky Junkins Visiting Addis Ababa, Ethiopia's capital, irrevocably altered Nick Page 's musical perspective. On his second collaboration with Ethiopia 's finest talents, the man known as Dubulah once again transitions smoothly between far-ranging styles including Azmari traditional, reggae, rock, and even hip hop. While the album's mood segues continually, each iteration is an unnoticed evolution from the previous flawless entry, thanks to the masterful foreman of the collaboration. Dub 's production touches are the resin sealing the work into a coherent offering, demonstrating Ethiopia's vibrant spirit. The album is mostly sung in the lovely, ephemeral syllables of Azmari - one of 90 languages spoken in Ethiopia, and one that lends itself well to Dubulah's epic sounds. Resonating reggae keystrokes, gently hammering drum claps, and fluttering flutes all match the tongue's fluidity, best exemplified by the feathery "Wey Fikir." Then there is the album's only jarring change, a familiarly reassuring switch back to English on "Satta Massagana." Suddenly, Western listeners have intellectual concepts to accompany the wafting, visceral messages. Listeners can rock out to "Yeh Shimbraw Tir Tir," and then groove to the snakelike sway of a sidewinder in the desert wind to "Kuratu," perhaps inappropriate for the wet land the musicians hail from. The capstone is "Guragigna" - a militantly musical style by irresistible instructors who show us how to shake. On this album huge horn sections boom, steadfastly accompanied by funky guitarists. Interspersed digital key notes are messengers of the human guides who, in expressing their existence, lead listeners and artisans both on a merry and scintillating voyage.
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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~V/N
ON THE lio'W
WHY ARE YOU SMILING?
PHOTOS BY VINCE LATHAM FACEBOOK.COM/VANGUARD.PHOTOGRAPHY
Kenneth Kelly kenneth.kellyl2@gmail.com
No Reason A couple weeks ago my column debuted, my stupid mug was on the cover, and I got hate mail. It was pretty exciting. A friend was asking me about it because he saw my picture with the caption "Why are you smiling?" underneath and he said, "What the shit does that mean?'' I told him there were two main reasons I picked that as my title. First, I'm bad with titles. Second, it's a question people ask me almost every day. It's understandable. I'm admittedly kind of a weird dude, and I smile, for seemingly no reason, quite often. I spend a lot of my mental energy simply thinking of things to amuse myself. I don't say these things out loud either because I wasn't listening to the conversation, the joke I thought of is likely to cross some sort of line, or because I just can't remember how my tangential brain got from a discussion on how hair can be political to the phrase "Joseph Pepper MD's Cure-All Tonic: Made from prunes dried by 1,000 suns!" So when people ask me, "Why are you smiling?" I usually say, "No reason." It only partially annoys me when people ask me the question. Can't a guy just smile? I understand it when people ask, "Why the long face?'' It's usually asked out of concern for the person who has inexplicably been thrust into ennui, whether that concern is genuine or not. However, when people ask why someone is smiling for no apparent reason, it's probably not asked in hopes that the person experiencing some shred of joy
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may share that feeling. It's asked with the undertone of "What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you crazy?" How did this happen? Why is it considered crazy for people to smile when nobody else is talking to them? Is it weird to just enjoy being inside your own mind? I have a better question: "Why AREN'T you smiling?" Why is your default disposition one of neutrality? Seriously, if you're not stoked to be alive in a universe where less than 1% of planets sustain life and have the cognitive abilities to be reading this and think to yourself, "This guy's an idiot," you're doing it wrong. Why are you wasting your time being neutral or bored? That isn't to say there isn't a time to be angry or sad. By all means, don't smile at those times. But there isn't a time to be bored. Why live in the middle? Why let the mundane control your life? I don't mean to get all Tony Robbins on you, but I just want it to be okay for people to smile and for others to not think they have imaginary friends, or that it's somehow an affront to their own unhappiness. There's nothing wrong with the people who smile for "no reason." There's something wrong with the people who don't.
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A Space Opera That Doubles As A Weapon
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Great North Road by Peter F. Hamilton Del Rey I endeavored to read the colossal Peter F. Hamilton novel, Great North Road, in hardcover after much encouragement from my boyfriend, who had "heard good things," and happened to be hovering around me while I was in the bookstore. I think that he was really hoping that the largeness of this book would keep him from imminent trips to the bookstore for a while. He was right, it took me a month to finish this monster. Aside from how slowly I read, this nearly thousand-pager certainly lived up to the term "space opera." It was like reading a sci-fi/ techno, thrilling version of Days Of Our Lives. I tried to describe the story after I'd read it but it's so intense with backstories, parallel plots, and twists that I sounded like a person recounting a particularly bizarre dream. How do you review a book like that? First, there's a procedural cop-drama style story thread to set everything up. A cloned brother belonging to the North family shows up dead under a bridge, sending futuristic chaos rippling through Newcastle. The North family is made up entirely of clones in control of a multi-world energy supply coming from far-flung colonized planets. So
when one of them winds up fish food under a bridge with no witnesses and looking like he lost a fight to Wolverine, it's kind of a huge deal. Enter 10,000 cop characters. Next, there 's Angela Tramelo. Convicted of killing the last North that wound up dead 20 years ago, she couldn't possibly have killed another North from jail, even if she really was Wolverine. Angela is a pivotal character - the Victor Kiriakis of Great North Road. Her role in the past, present, and future are intertwined throughout the story, weaving in and out rather deftly. Enter 50,000 new characters, every other chapter. And finally, there 's everything else; sweeping landscapes, alien swarms, a distinct environmental advocacy theme, and many more plausible, relatable characters and conflicts. It will give you carpal tunnel if you buy the hardcover, mark my words ; buy this beast as an e-book. I'm considering ducttaping my copy to a broom handle and using it to squish spiders. Most serious spiderbludgeoner, ever.
Stacey Moffitt I voluntee.r at t he Ch ico cat Coal it ion Yesterday at l0:46am · like Angela Youngblood I volu nleer at t he 1078 Cal lery. lit is great beca11J1se it is a not-for-profit that supports local anists i n al l med iu ms and is sole ly volunteer rn n. Yesterday at 10:46am · Li ke ·~ 2 Ange Bledsoe You' re all we.lcome to vo lunteer at Stone.wal l Al liance Center!ll Yesterday at 10:47am vla mobile · Li ke · ~ 2 Rachel e Nico e Irby Vo lu ntee,r at Cho-colate Fest i n Paradi sell hn p: / /www. face book.com / pages/ Parad ise-C hoco IateFe.st/ 2.l Cl 2 7 9815 6 7 2 6 51 ?ref =ts&fref= ts Yesterday at 10:47am · Edited · Like · ~ l Me,gan Haimbaugh CAVE at Chico State!!! We are all about commu nity service'. .:,: T he Butte Hu mane Society is w here I do my ho urs. Yesterday at 10:47am vla mobile· Li ke ·~ l
c audeue Reynolds Ritter cl othes and
shoes to Torres Shelte r, coats to pe,ople on streets , vouc.hers for Jesus ce.nter food, l11J1 nc.he.s for Sen iors .... donation s to ESPLANADE
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MARCH 18 - MARCH 24, 2013
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ARIES Your season begins Wednesday morning at 4:02 AM. A gathering of planets in Aries has already begun. We already have Mars and Uranus in Aries. On Wednesday well add the sun, and by Thursday night Venus enters Aries as well. Friday and Saturday look like your best days this week for travel, love affairs, creative expression, and just goofing around All things are new, fresh, and moving forward Enjoy the momentum that's building as spring comes on.
TAURUS What started out as a harmless flirtation could develop into some serious karma. It's funny how addictions begin as choices and end up being habits. What begins as a pleasure may not ultimately be good for us. Pay attention to your dreams for they contain messages. Help those that are more isolated than you. By Sunday; you11 be feeling better and be ready for some play. Pay off debts and make good karma. Be sure to get some extra sleep.
GEMINI Mercury is now direct this week. It's time to dig through the barrage of bills, e-mails, and messes to clean up. The last few weeks offered little in the way of comfort or clarity. Now it's time to get back on the horse and ride. Your social life is more in focus. Concerns over the future can be successfully planned and negotiated during this time. Monday through Tuesday morning the moon will still be in Gemini. Friends have your back. Ask for what you need
CANCER The last few weeks were dedicated to new experiences, possibly travel, higher education, and philosophical development. You were able to flow with empathy and compassion. Now you need to take some of those tricks you have learned and apply them to your workplace. You11 be in the public eye more. Tuesday afternoon through Thursday is extra powerful with the moon in Cancer. These are good days for planting seeds. Brush up on your talents and skills. You'll be needing to use
LEO The worst of your transformation experience has passed. By Wednesday you11 feel like you woke up on the right side of bed By Friday you'll see the world as your oyster and be ready to feast on it. You owe yourself a little vacation of some sort. Seek out the good qualities of others and you 11 find yourself being well-liked. Be open to exotic experiences. See yourself more as a winner and less as a passive observer. Your gains will be equal to the price of what you risk.
VIRGO No one is bulletproof in this world. We are all vulnerable to unpleasant occurrences. A loss on one scale can turn into a gain on another scale. Allow other people to help you. We are all interdependent beings whether we like it or not. Practice being loving and making good karma. By Sunday morning you11 begin to feel like your old self again as the moon moves into Virgo. Seduce and be seduced for all of the right reasons. Give away what you no longer need.
LIBRA Health issues should begin to improve this week. Growing pains are not easy. In order to be as lucky as you are, you had to experience some bad luck on the way as well. Be able to distinguish between needs and desires. Partnership issues are in the forefront. You see yourself as a natural negotiator. Contracts and work opportunities are more likely to be presented to you. Monday and Tuesday are best for getting things done and for deeper learning.
SCORPIO It's time to hit the gym, to stop eating junk food, and to adopt a healthier lifestyle for the spring. Be a team player and do what you can to work better with others. Seek a consensus when facing a challenge that affects your group. Tuesday afternoon through Thursday will be the easiest times for you to get things done and are your best days for travel. Causes that are based on kindness and charity are worth getting involved with this week.
SAGITTARIUS This is a higher-functioning time of year for you. You are able to take on quite a bit and do it all with a sense of grace and a smile. Creative expression flourishes as a conjunction of planets moves through your fifth house. If you have children, they are likely to be a big part of your focus. Love comes easy and being in your heart is even easier. Friday and Saturday have a very fiery energy about them. Enthusiasm and quick decisions are part of the picture.
CAPRICORN It's difficult remaining graceful when you're under stress. Be grateful that you still have good friends who have your back. Family can't be denied during this period. You are extra conscious about your feelings. You try to keep people around you that help you feel better about yourself. Do things to improve your memory. Don't allow scary insights to block the good inspiration that is your birthright. Be good to older adults in your family. Recognize the positive aspects of your tribe.
AQUARIUS Write a poem about the things you like. Make up a blues song about the things that get you down. See yourself as separate from your beliefs or your situation. The many talents and skills that you've accumulated through time and experience will be put to work. You begin the week on a positive note. You have some good moneymaking abilities coming to fruition. Keep your vehicles in good working order. You 11 need to be a little more mobile.
PISCES Fulfillment of your dreams is having the faith to take action and invest in yourself. You'll be working on putting a new face on this week. Values, money; and food are more in focus. You could also use a good massage about now. Tuesday afternoon through Thursday you get a surge of creative energy. What you lack is enough space in your life to allow the Creator to do a miracle for you. Let go and let the magic happen. Sing songs of praise and encouragement.
them.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY: Tom She/sky 3/18/50, Jeanie She/sky 3/18/58, Ron Toppi 3/24/65 Koz McKev is on You Tube, on cable 11 BCTV. is heard on 90.lFM KZFR Chico, and also available by appointment for personal horoscopes. Call (530)891-5147 or e-mail kozmickev@sunset.net
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