Tallahassee Woman Magazine October - November 2022 by Tallahassee Woman Magazine

OCTOBER/ NOVEMBER 2022

MARCIA

WARFEL

ECHA PA'LANTE

Keep Moving Forward

CELEBRATING HISPANIC HERITAGE HALLOWEEN PARTY PLANNING

WOMEN IN REAL ESTATE

BREAST CANCER AWARENESS

GIRL LET'S TALK ABOUT ALIMONY! DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

WOMEN TO WATCH WOMEN WHO MEAN BUSINESS

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TOP 25 HOSPITAL in Florida.

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CONTENTS

10. LETTER FROM PUBLISHER 12. LETTER FROM GUEST EDITOR

CULTURE & CUISINE

14. FALL IN LOVE WITH A NEW MAKEUP LOOK 16. FALL FARFELLE WITH CREAMY PUMPKIN SAUCE 18. HALLOWEEN PARTY PLANNING 19. REFRESH YOUR GARDEN FOR FALL 20. HISPANIC HERITAGE

LIVING LOCAL 22. W.E. ELEVATE: SARAH DOOLIN ROY 24. SWEET HOME TALLAHASSEE: FSU

BUSINESS & LEADERSHIP WWMB BUSINESS JOURNAL SPECIAL SECTION

32. GLOBAL ENTREPRENEUR ANA MELENDEZ 34. STACKED: WOMEN IN REAL ESTATE

35. WOMEN TO WATCH 36. LEGAL WRITES: ALIMONY 37. THE POWER OF SOCIAL MEDIA 38. ELEVATOR PITCH

TRAVEL

40. MADAME XHALES AT TEA SITES

We’re Expanding!

MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

42. MENTORING THROUGH FRIENDSHIP 45. SKINCARE TIPS FOR FALL 46. BEATING BREAST CANCER

LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS 48. CULTIVATING CREATIVITY 49. RAISING AWARENESS 50. THE IMPACT OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

W.E. INSPIRE

51. SEASON CHANGE

Dr. Dorothy White, Dr. Jana Bures-Forsthoefel, Dr. Kelly Forsthoefel, and Dr. Anna Malcolm

For over three decades, we’ve delivered personalized care for generations of women in every stage of life. Our physicians provide state-of-the-art care for all patients, implementing cuttingedge technology and earning awards for surgical excellence and high success rates for VBACs. We’re happy to welcome our fourth physician, Dr. Anna Malcolm, DO, to your trusted gynecology and obstetrics team.

Marcia Warfel

850-848-4628

goatallahassee.com 1405 Centerville Rd, Suite 4200, Tallahassee, FL 32308

tallahassee woman | 4 | october • november 2022

Gynecology & Obstetrics Associates of Tallahassee WELCOMES

Dr. Anna Malcolm to the practice

NOW ACCEPTING PATIENTS 850-848-4628 | goatallahassee.com 1405 Centerville Rd, Suite 4200, Tallahassee, FL 32308

Tallahassee

WOM A N

MAGAZINE

October - November 2022 • Volume 17 • Issue 6

Publisher | Editor-in-Chief Dr. Michelle Mitcham

EXECUTIVE EDITOR Laci Swann

CREATIVE DIRECTOR Olivia Heyward

EDITORIAL ASSISTANT Jennifer Knauf

DIRECTOR OF PUBLIC RELATIONS Marcia Warfel

CREATIVE CONSULTANT Briana Smith

DIRECTOR OF LEADERSHIP INITIATIVES Paula DeBoles-Johnson

RELATIONSHIP MANAGER Cristina Carter

DIRECTOR OF LUXURY TRAVEL Regina Lynch Hudson

ADVERTISING For advertising, visit talwoman.com, call (850) 893-9624, or e-mail ads@TalWoman.com.

TALLAHASSEE WOMAN is a publication of Mitcham Media Group LLC Post Office Box 16616 | Tallahassee, FL 32317-3401 Phone (850) 893-9624 | Fax (850) 254-7038 | info@TalWoman.com Tallahassee Woman is published six times per year and is distributed on a complimentary basis throughout Tallahassee and the surrounding communities.

TALWOMAN.COM The information in this publication is presented in good faith. The publisher does not guarantee accuracy or assume responsibility for errors or omissions. Copyright © 2022 Mitcham Media Group LLC. All rights reserved. Reproduction, in part or in whole, without expressed written consent of the Publisher is prohibited.

tallahassee woman | 6 | october • november 2022

Photo by Kira Derryberry Photography

Advertise with us!

Visit TALWOMAN.COM to download our Media Kit or Call 850.893.9624 to advertise with us.

CONTRIBUTORS

KIRA DERRYBERRY PHOTOGRAPHER DR. CHANTA Kira Derryberry is HAYWOOD a Tallahassee-based WRITER portrait photographer Dr. Chanta M. Haywood specializing in families, RENÉE RIVER is a seasoned university headshots and boudoir WRITER administrator, professor and commercial Renée is a wife, mother and scholar who MAYRA photography. She books of two, educator and currently serves on the ZIMMERMAN locally in Tallahasee LACI SWANN mental health advocate. faculty at FSU. She WRITER and is available for WRITER As founder of Mental owns ACE College Mayra Zimmerman, PA- Laci Swann is a Board travel worldwide. View Health in Action Inc. Success Academy, and is Kira's portfolio online at C; Board certified physi- Member of the Autism she's passionate about ed- a partner at MaxTheTest. cian assistant, expertise Society of Florida, kiraderryberry.com ucating and empowering com, a standardized testin cosmetic, surgical representing the state’s youth/young adults. As and general dermatolpanhandle in fundraising Director of Community prep company. ogy. Mayra specializes and advocacy efforts. Engagement for TWM, in Platelet Rich Plasma Laci is the Principal Renée hopes all women treatment for hair loss of Sharp Editorial, an love each issue as much and V-Beam laser for award-winning editorial as she does. vascular conditions. + small business consultMayra is a clinical assis- ing + branding design. tant professor at Florida State University.

LISA DAVIS WRITER Lisa Davis is a wife, mommy of four, beauty blogger, Freelance Makeup Artist, and Owner of Image by Lisa. God made her girly and she loves sharing her tips and tricks with other women so that they can look and feel their absolute best. For more information about Lisa visit imagebylisa.com.

LILY ETEMADI WRITER Lily brings a creative, REBECCA WEAVER collaborative leadership WRITER style to her endeavors Rebecca Weaver, through her experience news reporter, onas a communications, NATASHA MONIQUE air personality Steve marketing and Harvey Morning Show, COLEMAN corporate event CRISTINA CARTER guest chef WCTV’s WRITER planning professional. WRITER “Good Morning Show.” Natasha Monique Currently, Lily is the Cristina Carter, owner/ Rebecca inspires positive Coleman, Health and Deputy Director of founder of Tallahassee Human Service Program change nationally Communications for Notary, LLC, holds and internationally. Manager/Health the Florida Department a Master of Arts in She promotes peace, Educator Consultant, of Environmental International Relations respect for diversity, and Florida Department of Protection. from FSU and has taught advancements towards Health, Leon County. several courses there. She manages the Florida equality for all. She also co-directed/coDepartment of Health’s produced, “Las Chicas.” Breast and Cervical Early Detection Program.

tallahassee woman | 8 | october • november 2022

On November 16th, Women United will host its 6th Annual Leadership Breakfast, featuring Lauren Bush Lauren, in celebration of women leading in business and philanthropy. This year serves as a call to action for women and all members of our community to create positive change through sharing their time, talent, and treasure. Lauren Bush Lauren is the Founder and Chief Brand Officer of FEED, a social business and impact-driven lifestyle brand whose mission is to “create good products that help FEED the world”. A graduate of Princeton University, Lauren is also a fashion model and designer. When purchased, a FEED bag provides meals for one child in school for one year. FEED was founded in 2007 and has since provided over 120 million meals through non-profit giving partners globally and in the US. For her work with FEED, Lauren has received multiple awards including Fortune Magazine’s Most Powerful Women Entrepreneurs in 2009 and one of Inc. Magazine’s 30 Under 30 in 2010. Lauren also routinely speaks at global conferences that focus on business, philanthropy, and the issues of hunger and poverty. Examples include Forbes 400 Summit on Philanthropy, Forbes Women, Women in the World, Atlantic Ideas, and Aspen Ideas. She also serves on the Board of the Food Bank for NYC. Lauren is the granddaughter of former President George H. W. Bush. She is married to David Lauren, son of fashion designer Ralph Lauren, with 3 sons. We are so excited to have Lauren Bush Lauren speaking at the 6th Annual Women’s Leadership Breakfast and hope you will join us for this incredible event. For more information contact Alaina@uwbb.org U n ite d W ay of t h e B i g Bend l 3 07 E. Seventh Avenue l Tallahassee, FL 32 303 l Ph 85 0.41 4.0844 l w w w . uw bb.or g

Our Diversity is Our Unity

Happy Autumn!

love the changing of the seasons and especially the colors of fall. The trees and leaves are magnificent shades of orange, yellow, brown, and red, sort of like diverse people of all different hues and parts of the world. Diversity is our unity, and the oneness of our unity takes us to a higher level of understanding for each other and the world. In the name of unity, we seek to understand and be understood, appreciating diverse perspectives and people. The late Bob Marley sang about one love, and the Jamaican motto is, “Out of many, one people.” Celebrating diversity and multiracial roots were a part of my DNA growing up in an East Indian/Jamaican and African American family home. I saw first-hand the diversity of my family. Relatives of all different cultures and skin tones (brown, white, tan, black) from Canada, England, Jamaica, and other parts of the U.S. would visit and break bread as family. I heard various accents and dialects in my home and knew that all these diverse people were my family.

PUBLISHER

Our ability to reach unity in diversity will be the beauty and the test of our civilization. ~Mahatma Gandhi TWM celebrates diversity all year long, in each issue, from the photos that are selected to the topics that are featured. At the end of the day, it comes down to our

common core values and being humanistic. We are all a part of the human race, and it takes nothing away from anyone to celebrate everyone. This month, we continue our celebration of Hispanic Heritage. In Florida, Hispanic and Latino residents account for nearly 30% of the population, with nearly 7% in Tallahassee. On the cover, meet the confident and compassionate Marcia Warfel of Cuban heritage and culture. TWM is honored to have the esteemed guest editor Elizabeth Ricci, also of Hispanic heritage, interview Marcia. You will appreciate this heartfelt, authentic interview of the challenges and opportunities presented to Marcia over the years. Don’t miss our Women Who Mean Business feature on the dynamic and determined Analorena Melendez, interviewed by Cristina Carter. Both are brilliant Hispanic entrepreneurs that mean business. Tallahassee is a wonderful community that celebrates women and

Photo by Kira Derryberry Photography

women-owned businesses. TWM is honored to highlight Carrie Boyd in her new column, Stacked, in which she empowers women to elevate their foundation in real estate. In W.E. Elevate (Women Empowered Elevate), learn more about the impressive Sarah Doolin Roy and how she empowers our youth at the Young Actors Theater (YAT). It is an honor to serve the Tallahassee community and celebrate the wonderful women that live, work, advocate, and call Tallahassee home. One Love,

Dr. Michelle Mitcham

tallahassee woman | 10 | october • november 2022

L E T U S C R E AT E Y O U R

Everyday Oasis

L A N D S C A P E D E S I G N | I N S TA L L AT I O N | L I G H T I N G

“I think it’s important to move people beyond just dreaming into doing. They have to be able to see that you are just like them, and you made it.”

U G EST EDITOR

-U.S. Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor

Photo by Jennifer Powell Photography

hen my friend Michelle Mitcham asked if I’d be the guest editor of Tallahassee Woman Magazine’s Hispanic Heritage Month edition and interview my friend Marcia Warfel, of course I agreed. In fact, I texted Michelle, “I’m going to be a writer in my next life!” The truth is, I write every day for the work I do at my immigration law practice. This project, however, was different. Not only was I able to write in a casual style, but it allowed me to get to know my friend Marcia more intimately. I am grateful to have had the chance to tell her little-known story of hard work and perseverance—two characteristics shared by my Cuban and Italian great-grandparents, as well as my immigrant clients pursuing the American dream. U.S. Supreme Court Justice Sonia Sotomayor, who is of

Puerto Rican heritage once said, “I think it’s important to move people beyond just dreaming into doing. They have to be able to see that you are just like them, and you made it.” My hope is that my interview of Marcia conveys Justice Sotomayor’s message. Marcia, who always dreamed of having a stable and loving family life combined with financial stability, moved beyond that dream into achieving it. The single mom started over more than once, held multiple jobs, helped her parents, and got a master’s degree at 50, but she made it! Upon meeting her, you’d never know the hardships she went through. She’s positive, endearing, and full of energy. I imagine that most TWM readers share Marcia’s same goals and that we have also had to start over, work a second job, and sacrifice for our families. For those readers who are dreaming about achieving your goals, we are all just like Marcia. Take her advice. “Don’t ever give up. Keep climbing and persevering.”

Elizabeth is an award-winning attorney and managing partner of Rambana & Ricci, PLLC; named the “Go-to lawyer for veterans” by the Philadelphia Enquirer. Elizabeth, mother of two girls, is a volunteer Legal Studies teacher at Maclay High School. an advocate for improving the lives of women and girls in our community.

tallahassee woman | 12 | october • november 2022

tallahassee woman | 13 | october • november 2022

FALL IN LOVE WITH A NEW F

makeup look

CULTURE & CUISINE

all fashion trends are predictable, with boots and floppy hats replacing maxi dresses, and pastels transitioning into warmer hues. Makeup trends, on the other hand, can be challenging to keep up with, leaving us stuck in the rut of applying makeup the same way every season. It’s time to step outside of your comfort zone and embrace the beauty of fall! These makeup trends are natural, flattering, and achievable for everyone.

OVERLY BLUSHED

Don’t be shy with blush. Try brighter, pinker, and more of it! Play around with creams and powders, or use both. Apply more liberally on highest point of cheek bones, continuing to the apples of cheeks. Touch a bit on the tip of your nose as well. A beautiful flush is indicative of youth. Go for it!

BUFFED OUT BROWS

Harsh, drawn-on brows are out. Buffed out, wispy brows are in! Apply a colored brow gel in an upwards motion to separate, groom, and define hairs. After brow gel dries, apply pencil in super light upward strokes to mimic hair. Concentrate color on the middle and outer brow, avoiding the beginning of brow, so the head of it doesn’t look blunt.

overly blushed

EXAGGERATED LIPS

Haven’t ventured into lip fillers yet? That’s okay! Yes, a full lip is in, and you can create it. Overdraw the lip slightly with a brown-pink lip liner, carefully smudging liner inward. Use a slightly darker lip shade on the outside, and a lighter on the inside. Finish with a gloss. Shiny lips have made a comeback.

BIG LASHES

Big, fluffy lashes are always trending! Apply a first coat of mascara, allow lashes to dry, and reapply another coat. For falsies, choose a light, yet fluffy brand like Ardell Nakeds. You can’t feel them, but they add that WOW factor to any makeup look.

GLOWING SKIN

A matte finish may be necessary for photo shoots, but a dewy natural glow is beautiful for everyday life. To achieve this look, exfoliate weekly and moisturize daily. Apply foundation with a brush, buffing, as opposed to pressing, it into the skin. This lighter coverage will allow your natural glow to radiate through. Don’t forget to set it! Apply a setting spray to your bare face before applying foundation and after makeup is complete. I like to press the setting spray into my makeup, so that it looks like makeup is coming from my skin, and not sitting on the skin.

s p i l d e t a r exagge For all things beauty, follow @imagebylisa. Lisa Davis Elite Makeup Artist and Licensed Aesthetician Owner of Image By Lisa

tallahassee woman | 14 | october • november 2022

big lashes s w o r b t u o d e buff

glowing skin tallahassee woman | 15 | october • november 2022

O.M.P. Oh my, it's Pumpkin season!

FALL FARFELLE WITH CREAMY PUMPKIN SAUCE By Rebecca Weaver

hile you certainly wouldn't know it from this hot hot weather, fall is right around the corner and that means pumpkins, pumpkins, pumpkins!!! This year you are sure to find pumpkin in everything from coffee to potato chips, so why not take it a step further and add it to your pasta! Yep, you heard me correctly.... Pasta! This dish takes the flavors of the fall and couples them with an Italian flare! Introducing..... (*drum roll please*)..... Fall Farfelle with Creamy Pumpkin sauce (and the crowd says, "Yum!") This dish brings together all of your favorite fall veggies to include pumpkin, squash and sweet potatoes,

and it pairs them with a cream-based sauce seasoned with warm spices including nutmeg, cinnamon, and sage, mixed with traditional Italian spices, basil and oregano. For the carnivores in your family, you can spice it up with mild or hot Italian sausage. For those who prefer plant-based alternatives, omit the meat and cream and use coconut milk instead. This super versatile dish is sure to satisfy and get you ready for the (hopefully) cooler weather ahead. To that I say.... Let comfort food season begin!!

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DIRECTIONS Roast Squash and Sweet Potatoes:

Preheat oven to 400 F In a large bowl, toss cubed butternut squash and sweet potatoes with 1-2 Tbsp olive oil, salt, and pepper. Spread the squash on a parchment paper-lined baking sheet in one layer, without overcrowding. Roast in the preheated oven at 400 F for 30 minutes. Remove from oven and set aside Pasta: Fill a large pot with water and 1 teaspoon of salt and heat over high, bringing to a boil. Once pasta water is boiling, add farfalle pasta and cook until almost al dente, about 10-13 minutes. Drain

Sauce and Veggies:

Heat 2 Tbsp olive oil in a Dutch oven or large high-sided skillet over medium-high heat. If you are using Italian sausage, remove the meat from the casing and cook until browned (about 10 minutes, regularly stirring) making sure it is in crumbles as it cooks. Remove meat from pan and set aside. Add 2 Tbsp olive oil to same pan and add mushrooms and sundried tomatoes; sauté until softened, about 8 minutes. Add garlic, ginger, remaining salt, pepper red pepper flakes, nutmeg, sage and cinnamon; sauté 1 minute, until fragrant. Add chopped kale or spinach, stirring occasionally and cook until starting to wilt.

INGREDIENTS

6 Tbsp extra-virgin olive oil 4 garlic cloves minced 2 Tsp pink Himalayan salt or kosher salt (divided) 1/4 Tsp black pepper 1 Tsp crushed red pepper flakes 2 Tsp crushed ginger 2 Tsp ground nutmeg 1 Tsp ground cinnamon 1 Tsp sage 1 Tsp oregano 1 Tsp basil 1 cup canned pumpkin puree 1 – 1.5 cup(s) half & half or canned full-fat coconut milk 3 cups dry farfalle (bow-tie) pasta 1 cup sliced cremini mushrooms 2 cups chopped kale or fresh baby spinach 1 cup diced squash 1 cup diced sweet potatoes ½ cup chopped sundried tomatoes Optional: 1 lb mild or hot Italian sausage, casing removed Parmesen cheese for garnish

Stir in pumpkin puree and half & half or coconut milk cream; stir in oregano, basil and sage. If using Italian sausage, add cooked Italian sausage back to the pan during this time. Reduce heat to low, cover and allow to simmer. About 15 minutes. Use a slotted spoon to transfer cooked pasta to sauce, stirring to incorporate. Serve, topped with roasted squash and sweet potatoes, and enjoy!! Optional: Top with freshly grated Parmesen cheese or add grated cheese to sauce.

Cooking Tips:

1) You can also add the roasted squash and sweet potatoes to the sauce if you want! 2) Seasoning to taste: if you love warm fall flavors, feel free to add more nutmeg and/or cinnamon to your liking. If you're not so much into sweetness, but instead prefer more heat, add more red pepper flakes. Everyone's taste preference is different so don’t be afraid to experiment with your spices! 3) Sauce thickness: If you like more of a thinner sauce, use 1 and ½ cups cream or coconut milk. Want to be social? Follow Rebecca on her Instagram @fierceinfluence

tallahassee woman | 17 | october • november 2022

How to Throw a Fun Halloween Party By Cristina Carter

ho doesn’t love a thriller Halloween party where you get to dress up and enjoy a spooky night with friends?

Below are some tips on how to throw a frighteningly fun party.

THEME Pick a theme and make it clear in your invitation to guests. Do you want a cute and funny or a scary and frightening party? Vampires or zombies? Kid-friendly or not? Encourage your guests to dress the part and make your expectations clear.

DECORATIONS Make an eerie first impression by setting up a fog machine at the entrance. Use purple, green, or red lighting along with candles throughout the house to change the mood. Add some cobwebs, skulls, ravens, or bats, and place them throughout according to your theme. Get creative with this, check out sites like Pinterest for ideas.

FOOD What’s a good Halloween party without monster meatballs, bat brownies, or mummy hotdogs? Take the time to create spooky nameplates for everything on the menu for an extra kick. Use a pumpkin as a cooler by cutting it in half and filling it with ice or serve witches brew with food-grade dry ice.

GAMES Play some games and give scary prizes away. Whether it’s a Halloween scavenger hunt, a pumpkin carving contest, a partner mummy wrap, or a costume competition. You may even consider a scary photo booth and print the photos out at the end of the night and serve them as party favors. Have fun with it!

PLAYLIST Make sure you have a monster-mashing time playing Halloween classics by using a streaming device for your guests. Just pick your favorite holiday classic and a playlist will generate for you. Simply spooky how easy it is.

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It’s Fall Y’all

What’s not to love about the season of football, delicious food, and cooler weather?! Fall is finally here, and - as always - Tallahassee Nurseries has everything you need to refresh your garden to bring that magical feeling of Fall to your home & landscape. Fall is the season of bold garden color, and we love it! Fall classics like beloved mums, blooming camellias and colorful pansies are in stock and ready to bring home. Need other ways to incorporate color into your outdoor space? Add stunning potted containers filled with seasonal flowers and fun garden art accents in your favorite seasonal hues.

This time of year is amazing for planting herbs, veggies and citrus. Veggie staples like tomatoes, lettuce and okra, along with herb favorites parsley, thyme and rosemary make for wonderful ways to spice up your dishes in the kitchen - right from your own garden. Pick from dozens of citrus varieties to start or expand your yearly bounty of delicious food!

Thanksgiving & Halloween decor are waiting in the Gift Cottage, ready for you to bring them home to festify your space. No front door in the South is complete without a wreath! Our Cottage designers have silk wreaths available, or can make a custom wreath to perfectly compliment your style. Ask about a floral centerpiece for your Thanksgiving table while you’re there!

TALLAHASSEE NURSERIES | THE CITY’S PREMIER GARDENING CENTER | TALLAHASSEENURSERIES.COM tallahassee woman | 19 | october • november 2022

Celebrating

Latino Owned Businesses in America

By: Cristina Carter

id you know Latinos are 1.7 times more likely to start a business than all other demographic groups? (Closing the Capital Gap: Fueling the Promise of Latino-owned Businesses, 2021). In fact, Latinos start businesses at a faster rate than all other groups in the US and have seen a 44% growth in the last 10 years compared to 4% for nonLatinos according to the US Census Annual Business Survey, 2019. A study conducted by the Stanford Latino Entrepreneurship Initiative (SLEI) research program shows that in addition to being entrepreneurs Latino-owned businesses (LOBs) develop or sell a technology or software products at a higher rate than others at 19% compared to 14% of White-owned businesses (WOBs). The pandemic strengthened LOBs as they were more likely to report making proactive

efforts to combat the challenges of the pandemic. While both LOBs and WOBs stated they were confident their businesses will recover from the pandemic; LOBs have a higher revenue growth (12%) since the pandemic compared to WOBs (7%). According to the 2021 SLEI: Survey of U.S. Business Owners, the number of jobs created by LOBs has grown from 1.9 million in 2007 to 2.9 million in 2019, representing 53.6% growth rate compared to 9.8% growth among WOBs over the same time frame. LOBs are also more likely to initiate technology-based solutions and strategies as they adapted their businesses to the demands and opportunities created by the pandemic. Both LOB and White Owned Businesses (WOB) reported they were confident their businesses will recover from

Cristina Carter is the founder and owner of Tallahassee Notary, LLC a company that provides international bilingual services.

Cristina Cart

Cristina shared: Pa’lante (go ahead - don’t give up) is a phrase I heard often growing up from my Cuban and Venezuelan parents. Being a first-generation American (and

the pandemic. However, more than half of LOBs indicate some combination of remote work and in-person for employees. Although WOBs outnumber LOBs by a factor of 14, research indicates that once Latinos cross the employer threshold, the breakthrough in tech comes despite the low amounts of venture capital (VC) allocated to Latino and Black founders – 2.6% of VC in 2020. While SLEI reports that both LOBs and WOBs anticipate their businesses will support them in building sufficient wealth for the future including retirement; LOBs stated they are twice as likely to report their primary goal as a entrepreneur is to operate a business that can be inherited by their family. After all, as my parents always told me growing up - la familia siempre va primero.

Tally local) my parents always taught me I had the best of both worlds. I love listening to Gloria Estefan while the aroma of ropa vieja lingers through the house as the family arrives for dinner. I enjoy drinking Materva (a Cuban soda) and ice-cold sweet tea (depending on my mood), salsa dancing, and waking up to Venezuelan arepas with Cuban espresso to start my day.

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Ana Melendez is the CEO of A&E Wholesale of North Florida Ana was born in Mexico City, Mexico and is a true Latina entrepreneur. Having lived around the global, she calls Tallahassee her home today, where she brings her international expertise to the table. Ana has made significant changes

Ana Melend

Mayra is a Physicians Assistant at Dermatology Associates of Tallahassee as well as a Clinical Assistant Professor, Florida State University, College of Medicine. Mayra shared: I was born in Peru, and although I have spent most of my life in the U.S., Peruvian culture is something to be celebrated. My favorite things include salsa dancing parties, ceviche (the national food of Peru), bright colored outfits that the Indigenous people wear,

beautiful artwork, hiking through the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu, visiting the Amazon Rainforest, sandboarding in the sand dunes, seeing the Nazca Lines from a plane, and more. Although the main language of Peru is Spanish, Inca descendants speak their native languages. The influence of European, African, and Asian ethnic groups has had a large impact on the culture and the people of Peru, and you can see it in the differences in Peruvian food, art, and music.

Katherine works in Marketing and Client Relations at Proper Wealth, in addition to owning her college advising business, Admit-Ed, LLC.

erona-Balog

Katherine N

Katherine shared: Born and reared in Puerto Rico, I lived on the island until the age of 21. I have always been proud of my heritage. We are vibrant and kind, love to greet others with a kiss on the cheek, and enjoy eating mouthwatering food such as arroz con

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to her business including using advanced technology in order to adapt to changes seen in the market in the post-pandemic era. She is a graduate of the Stanford Latino Entrepreneurship Initiative (SLEI) a research program designed to expands the knowledge of Latino entrepreneurship across the United States.

-C

merman, PA

Mayra P. Zim

gandules or alcapurrias. The 3,500 square mile island is home to countless attractions such as Old San Juan, El Yunque and La Parguera among others, and is rich in culture. Puerto Ricans always find a reason to celebrate life through many annual festivals including Fiesta de Los Reyes Magos, Fiestas de la Calle San Sebastian and Fiestas Patronales in each town. !Hasta la próxima!

W.E. ELEVATE Women Empowered Elevate

Performing Arts and Society An Interview with Sarah Doolin Roy By: Cristina Carter

LIVING LOCAL

arah Doolin Roy is the executive director of Young Actors Theatre. She holds a master’s degree in public administration and non-profit management from NYU, which she earned while working at the Council on Foreign Relations in New York City. She served as the director of marketing communications and partnerships at American Ballet Theatre before returning to her hometown of Tallahassee in 2020. I grew up with Sarah, attending Young Actors, Tallahassee Dance Academy, and Trinity Catholic School together. It was wonderful catching up with my dear old friend while discussing the performing arts. What have the arts meant in your life? The performing arts have been central to my life since childhood. They’ve provided opportunities to travel the nation and globe as a performer and professional, and they’ve transported me to other worlds as an audience member. I don’t think a day goes by without the urge to be uplifted by music and dance. What are the benefits of getting your children involved early? Research states that children who have access to the arts have higher GPAs and test scores and are less likely to drop out of school. Programs like Young Actors allow kids to find their unique voice and have their talents developed and

celebrated in a supportive community. Our students work hard as a company to accomplish a shared goal: authentic storytelling through dazzling productions. As a parent, what could be more rewarding than seeing your child beam on our stage?! What skill sets are developed as a result of being exposed to the arts? The transferable skills that are the result of exposure to the arts are countless. A few include conflict resolution, empathy, collaboration, adaptability, listening, accountability, presence, public speaking, and problem-solving when the show must go on! Young Actors alumni shine on Broadway, in network, and on Netflix shows. They also lead board rooms and operating rooms and shoot for the stars, with two currently employed by NASA. Is there anything about the arts you would like people to know that I haven't asked you today? We have yet to understand the full scope and implications of the pandemic, and I am particularly mindful of the social and emotional well-being of young people. Consider the time students have spent on screens and how media influences brain development. I believe that, beyond entertainment, the performing arts serve as a powerful tool for collective healing.

tallahassee woman | 22 | october • november 2022

Sarah Doolin Roy

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SWEET HOME TALLAHASSEE

Maura Scott

Maura Scott is a scholarly champion of the underserved and the latest eminent scholar at FSU and the College of Business. She’s the first African American woman to become a full professor of marketing at FSU. As an award-winning researcher, she tirelessly champions the exploration of ethics, inclusivity, gender equity, and racial equality, and she looks into ways in which businesses can simultaneously manage their bottom lines and make life better for their customers. “As a woman and an

under-represented minority, my journey has been different than that of many of my colleagues,” she says. “Yet, being a ‘first’ can bring value that can elevate the entire community by galvanizing those distinct experiences, perspectives, ideas, and approaches to problem-solving as we work together to address society’s grand challenges.” More about Dr. Scott and her promotion to Dr. Persis E. and Dr. Charles E. Rockwood Eminent Scholar in Marketing.

Paulette Curtis is an expe-

who has worked in administrative roles at Ohio State University, the University of Notre Dame, and at Harvard, says she aims to “create more community in what you might call the ‘honors family.’ You want to build community and to serve the students who are a part of a community and your unit. I also think Honors can play an important role in making the campus richer and more robust in various ways.”

rienced Harvard University-educated scholar and administrator who has just been named FSU’s associate dean of Undergraduate Studies and Honors Program director. She starts her new role Sept. 16. FSU Associate Provost Joe O’Shea says he thinks Curtis “will continue to develop our Honors Program into one of the finest in the nation.” Curtis, a visiting scholar at Tulane University

Paulette Curtis

tallahassee woman | 24 | october • november 2022

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tallahassee woman | 25 | october • november 2022

COVER

| 26 | october • november 2022

ECHA PA'LANTE

Keep Moving Forward

BY ELIZABETH RICCI | PHOTOGRAPHY: KIRA DERRYBERRY

“Echar pa’ lante” is the Spanish phrase my friend Marcia Warfel lives by.

t loosely translates to “keep time together late into the evening moving forward.” Marcia’s hours. story is one of perseverance, The family soon left the tumult friendships, faith, starting over, that was Miami in the 1980s for hustling, helping, and being helped. Tallahassee. Marcia remembers Marcia's parents, the Garcias, fled being the only Latina in her classCuba when her mother, who was es at Trinity Catholic School and about to become a school teacher, Maclay School. She and her classrefused to teach Communist stud- mates used to hang out around Kilies, and her grandfather's tobacco learn. On more than one occasion, farm was seized by Fidel Castro's they rang Coach Bobby Bowden’s regime. They came to the U.S. doorbell and surreptitiously left seeking opportunity and security, FSU memorabilia in hopes he and they got their start washing would sign and leave the treasures dishes, working in factories, and for them the next day. He always cleaning hospitals in Connecticut, did. where Marcia was born. Like many first-generation AmeriThe Garcias were a family of four, cans, Marcia translated documents, including Marcia, her parents, and opened accounts, negotiated busiher abuela, Clara, who was her ref- ness, and performed daily tasks uge and confidante. Despite only on behalf of her Spanish-speaking having a fourth-grade education, family—all tasks that were tradiMr. Garcia was a multilayered tionally delegated to men, but bego-getter, who had a strong work cause she was an only child, the ethic and greatly influenced Mar- duties fell to Marcia. She learned cia. Mrs. Garcia, on the other hand, early on that it took a dedicated was Marcia’s moral compass. work ethic to achieve her goals and In 1973 the Garcias moved to Mi- realize her aspirations. ami where the family continued Her business skills and confidence with their Catholic faith, and Mar- helped Marcia land her first job as cia made friends from all back- an administrative assistant at a logrounds, including her neighbor, cal stockbroker’s office where she Lee, from whom she learned En- answered phones and typed correglish. Marcia has fond memories of spondence after school. her early childhood in Miami. She She took what she learned at work recalls gathering with extended and helped form an investment family listening to music—usual- club called Spare Change. She and ly salsa—dancing, playing domi- her friends invested in Coca-Cola noes, endless Cuban dishes—from stocks, which were sold at $1.20 ropa vieja enjoying at the time compared to today’s tallahassee womanto | flan—and 27 | october • november 2022

$62.31. Although the job was a great learning experience, she later left it to volunteer and eventually work for the American Cancer Society after her beloved abuela died from ovarian cancer in 1989. Because Mr. Garcia was usually away from home and the few relatives she had were far away in Connecticut and South Florida, Marcia did not have any real adult mentors as a young woman. She soon found that there were women she admired and knew she would one day mentor and help other women like herself. Although she wanted to leave Ta l l a h a s s e e to attend college out of state, Marcia felt a sense of obligation to stay and help her mother. Instead, she attended TCC and FSU where she majored in international relations, aspired to get a graduate degree, and achieve more than her circumstances seemed to dictate. Throughout school, Marcia worked hard as a Spanish tutor, in office jobs, and for law firms to help pay her family’s bills. “I always had a side hustle,” Marcia said. Friends and colleagues helped, too, and she still treasures those friendships today. They wrote recommendation letters, made introductions, assisted with scholarship applications, and even gave her loans to help lighten the load so she could achieve her goals of financial stability and a secure family life. One friend suggested she spread her wings and explore beyond the capital city. She faced her fears, doubts, and challenges head on with focused determination and, with her mom in tow, Marcia temporarily headed back to Miami where she still

had some family and contacts. She looked through the classifieds and applied for a job at a law office on Biscayne Boulevard. It turned out that she and the hiring attorney had common connections in Tallahassee. With enough money from her new job for a deposit, she rented a loft behind Miracle Mile and hit the ground running in her new position. “It was beautiful. On the top floor. I was all in and learned a lot from that job. It was super bien,” she said. Marcia worked on a political campaign for one of the law firm’s clients. She spent hours researching issues on microfiche, meeting reporters, and preparing for press conferences. She quickly earned the partners’ trust and respect, was given more responsibilities, including accounting duties and casework, and soon became a paralegal. Though she loved the work, she was still helping to maintain the family’s Killearn home. Between the hectic schedule and fast food, she wasn’t eating right. Already petite, she lost several pounds. The Miami traffic was getting to her, too. She was under so much stress. “If you gave me a hug, I’d shrug from the pain,” she recounted. Marcia decided start again with the little bit of money she had saved and come home to Tallahassee, where she realized service was her vocation. Through a friend’s recommendation, she was interviewed and selected for her first planning job doing disaster recovery in 1998. With back-to-back hurricanes, there were times when she worked 18-hour days, 7 days a week. “I was burning the candles from both ends,” she said. Two years later, she became the state vol-

“Don’t ever give up on achieving your dreams and goals.”

untary agency liaison for the Department of Community Affairs, Division of Emergency Management, and after she moved her way up, she bought her first home. She also learned she loved helping people who had to start over like she had. “Those who need help, help others. That was me,” Marcia explained. By 2006, Marcia became bureau chief for preparedness, then bureau chief for recovery and mitigation as deputy state coordinating officer and deputy incident commander at the Division of Emergency Management. Although she oversaw billions of dollars and a staff of 175 or more, she never forgot her humble beginnings, those who helped her move up, or to continue persevering. “Working natural disasters is what brought us together. She was organized, full of energy, and always had all the answers to my questions. Her top priority was finding ways to connect survivors of disasters with the resources they needed to get back on their feet,” explained her friend Alia Faraj-Johnson. Marcia then met a charismatic emergency management military liaison who consistently sat in front of her during leadership meetings—not only was Marcia the only woman in those meetings, but she was also the only Latina. The two became friends, eventually married, and moved to Washington, DC, where Marcia worked for federal agencies as an emergency management consultant. Next, she gave birth to her daughter, Sophia. However, she soon moved to Tallahassee a third time to start all over again, this time with a baby in tow. At times she was unable to sleep for days on end due to the stress. She went through her contact list and wondered who she knew in emergency management who could help her to find her next job, one she needed. Marcia made it clear. “It’s about relationships, relationships, relationships.” She called on her friend Alia, who, in 24 hours, arranged for Marcia to have an interview through the governor’s office. This in turn led to an interview with the Volunteer Florida Foundation. Within a couple of years, Marcia became deputy director of

tallahassee woman | 28 | october • november 2022

tallahassee woman | 29 | october • november 2022

emergency management. While at Volunteer Florida, Marcia met four incredible women she calls her “circle of sisters.” One sister, Paula DeBoles-Johnson, shared that “Marcia is one of the most giving, tenacious, and supportive women I know. We've bonded over the need to make impactful change in our community through service, disaster recovery, our families, our businesses, and our unwavering faith in God. She is brave, loving, and spreads joy wherever she goes.” During that time, Marcia helped her parents move into a senior living condo. However, five years ago, Marcia needed more flexibility to be able to take care of her daughter. She took a leap of faith and launched Maxim Consulting, an emergency management firm, with one of her Volunteer Florida sisters, Ericka McKibbin. Ericka shared that “it was Marcia’s tenacious spirit and drive to create a company that would help take people and businesses to the next level that attracted me to this opportunity. We built the company from the ground up and stayed committed to unleashing potential of our clients to excel in their respective industry. Our business reflected our shared values of service, growth, and impact.” Marcia noted, “things were going well. I pulled in five women. Things were fine, not great, but fine. I had flexibility and we all had work.” She didn’t stop there, though. While at Maxim, Marcia simultaneously worked as a senior government consultant for the emergency management arm of a public accounting firm while mentoring young professional women on her lunch hours, after work, and on weekends. Then God threw her a lifeline and she found her true faith. “Before, I was just going through the motions.” She turned to prayer. Now, when Marcia faces a tough situation, she pictures God smiling at her and offering support and kindness. She also has an affinity for Archangel Michael who she says is usually “on

duty” for her. But it is Nuestra Señora de la Caridad del Cobre, or Our Lady of Charity, Cuba’s patron saint, who she most often leans on. Marcia understood that although she had extensive experience, she needed more credentials to advance even further. That point hit home when one day, little Sophia asked her, “Mommy, how many degrees do you have?” First, she earned a graduate certificate in homeland security and emergency management from FSU. Her friends from the Junior League encouraged her to apply for a master’s. Her undergrad GPA, however, was one-tenth of a point under the threshold for graduate program admission. Of course, she didn’t give up. Marcia explained that she was a single mom whose daughter promised to one day earn a doctorate if Marcia earned a master’s. She was accepted, but her statistics course proved difficult. Her friend Paula connected her with a tutor who, along with Our Lady of Charity, helped Marcia eventually earn an A in the course. She secured a master’s in public administration in July, 2022. Then an opportunity came. Marcia was chosen to oversee a global firm’s emergency management business in Florida. She now works full-time doing what she loves and finally enjoying the life she had always struggled for thanks to the culmination of all her hard work over the last years. But, like she always does, Marcia ensured the ladies she hired at Maxim had secure jobs. Now, gutsy Marcia is grateful for the difficult experiences that taught her to poner a mal tiempo buena cara, put a good face on a bad situation, and made her who she is today. Without a doubt, she is the consummate example of a tenacious woman who works hard, never gives up, and cares deeply for her family and friends. She continues to provide for her parents, who are now in their 80s and live nearby. Marcia adores 11-year-old Sophia whom I expect will practice Marcia’s mantra of always moving forward, earn the doctorate

she promised, and be a successful servant leader. In the meantime, young Sophia has already spent countless hours volunteering for Volunteer Florida with the governor's special initiatives, Tallahassee/Leon County Girls Annual Summit, Junior League of Tallahassee, TMH, the Florida National Guard, TMH Foundation, Leon County Humane Society, Boys & Girls Club, and at nursing homes. A secure family and fulfilling life are now finally a reality for Marcia, but she continues to grow professionally and spiritually. When she and Sophia are home enjoying their well-earned family time, the two enjoy the company of their longhaired miniature dachshund, Valentina, and a royal blue beta fish named Sparkle. Community involvement: Club 25 Women, LeanIn, Dress for Success, Women for FSU, United Way, Women United, Oasis Center for Women and Girls, Family Friendly task force, Women’s Club, Junior League, Capital Women’s Network, Girl Scouts, Commission on the Status of Women and Girls. Mantra: “Don’t give up. Keep moving forward.” The book currently on Marcia’s nightstand: “Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap...and Others Don't” by Jim C. Collins Fun fact: “I was a Gayfer Girl.” Gayfer Girls were a group of academically successful, fashionable girls who acted as community ambassadors. Most meaningful gift: “Handmade treasures from Sophia.” Qualities Marcia values most in a friend: “Loyalty and trust.” Advice she’d give her younger self: “Choose relationships wisely. Look at what’s inside.” Biggest hope: “That Sophia is happy, pursues her dreams, follows her moral compass, keeps her faith, and does not use shortcuts.” Message to other women: “Don’t ever give up on achieving your dreams and goals. Keep climbing keep persevering. And always ask, ‘what’s next?’”

tallahassee woman | 30 | october • november 2022

Women Who Mean

OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2022

Photo by Jennifer Powell Photography

BUSINESS

SPECIAL SECTION

JOURNAL

z e d n e l e M a n A

tallahassee woman | 31 | october • november 2022

An Interview with

BUSINESS & LEADERSHIP

GLOBAL ENTREPRENEUR

Ana Melendez A

nalorena Melendez, CEO of A&E Wholesale of North Florida makes being a successful international entrepreneur look easy. However, being an entrepreneur myself, I know firsthand that owning and running businesses in Mexico City, Dubai, San Francisco, Chicago, and Tallahassee is far from easy. Ana obtained her Bachelor of Arts and Master of Business Administration from The Ohio State University and is a graduate of the esteemed Stanford Latino Entrepreneurship Initiative. I sat down with Ana and asked her some of the most important questions business owners and prospective business owners want to know.

Photo by Jennifer Powell Photography

1. What are your secrets to success and advice for women starting businesses? Be a realist, not a dreamer. Ask questions like: What does the competitive market look like? Future growth? How can we adapt to changes in the consumers and competitors’ needs and wants? These are all questions you should ask yourself before starting a business. You want to have insurance for employees, human resources and accounting representatives. Most of all, you want to think of the worst-case scenario and ask yourself, is this business still able to grow? 2. I know that you have lived and worked in countries all over the world including Mexico, Dubai, and major cities in the states like San Francisco, Chicago, and Tallahassee. What have you learned from doing business globally? Feeling uncomfortable is good in business. You want

| WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 special section

to get out of your comfort zone to be successful because you are learning something new. If you don’t know something, ask. Don’t get discouraged when you come across cultural differences. Instead, move forward and understand that it isn’t personal. What may hurt you could very well be a misinterpretation of cultural world views. 3. What is your why? My son, Addison, has inspired me as well as changed the way I view many things in life, including medical care for children. A simple procedure can be thousands of dollars and many people cannot afford that. My goal is to open a charitable organization under A&E Wholesale of North Florida where we pay off the medical debt for children between ages one-day-old to seven-years-old. These families shouldn’t have to struggle with medical debt due to their children’s medical past. They should be focusing on their kids. My why is to help children and their families.

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FROM THE DESK OF

Carrie Boyd

Sisters, Your Foundation Starts with WHY

he first time I participated in the social justice group activity known as the “privilege walk,” I was a twentysomething, newly minted lawyer wrangling over real estate contracts gone bad and serving divorce clients. If you are unfamiliar with this activity, participants line up at the same starting line, close their eyes, and take a step forward or backward after each question. The questions are along the lines of “If you grew up having your own bedroom, step forward; if you grew up sharing a bedroom or having no bedroom at all, step backward,” and so on as to issues such as gender equity, housing, education, and more. At the end, everyone who is sighted opens their eyes and sees the changed landscape. Even before I opened my eyes, I knew my foundation had cracked. As the tears flowed from deep within, I was surprised that my perspective had not been altered by the advantages of my father’s family being laid bare; rather, it was the sacrifices of the generations of women on my mom’s side that flooded me like stream. My dad’s family was heralded as small-town royalty, whereas my mom had a hardscrabble childhood. I relived the years of suffering by her and the women in our family on that walk. I felt the heartbreak of my Grammy who was abused and the only divorced woman in our town in the 1950s. My body tensed with the back-breaking pain of Grammy’s mother who labored on the plains of the Midwest. I saw my mom as a little girl with only two tattered dresses. I thought of my Great Aunt Mary who hitchhiked to Chicago after high school with only a few dollars and a dream; she would go on to become

an ardent MLK Jr. supporter and civil rights activist. My tears were my mom’s tears when Grammy died young, when she lost a baby, when my dad passed too soon, and all the financial and housing struggles Mom ever endured. The life lessons I learned from scorching summer days on the farm and toiling over textbooks at Mom’s insistence bubbled up and demolished my fake foundation. My real WHY was there all along—I just had not unearthed it yet. When you know your WHY, everyone around you knows it, too. You move and speak differently, and it underscores every decision you make. It will be standing alongside you in the rubble of tough times and the reason for your rise when you overcome. It was several years later when I heard business author Simon Sinek speak about knowing your WHY and communicating from the inside out that my life really changed. I realized that whether it is real estate investing, parenting, nonprofit work, or anything else in life, people don't buy what you do—they buy why you do it. And, what you do simply proves what you believe. Your life can change as well once you own your WHY. Your ancestors are watching. Let’s get to building your authentic foundation in real estate, one brick at a time! First, it starts with WHY.

kcarrie@livegive850.com 34

| WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 special section

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WOMEN TO WATCH N E W S | A W A R D S | M I L E S T O N E S

allahassee Woman Magazine celebrates April Salter and Heidi Otway, on their special recognition by Inc. These outstanding women are continuing to blaze a trail! Congratulations SalterMitchell PR on being recognized by Inc. as one of the fastest growing private companies in America on its annual Inc. 5000 list. According to Inc, SalterMitchell PR has a national rank of 2,700 and a Florida rank of 217, SMPR joins this prestigious list of independent companies who have achieved accelerated growth and success. “The accomplishment of building one of the fastest-growing companies in the U.S., in light of recent economic roadblocks, cannot be overstated,” says Scott Omelianuk, editor-in-chief of Inc. “Inc. is thrilled to honor the companies that have established themselves through innovation, hard work, and rising to the challenges of today.” April Salter founded the firm as Herrle Communications Group in 1999. The company grew and evolved into SalterMitchell PR, an award-winning communications consultancy focused on helping good causes win. Clients include Fortune 500 companies, businesses, state agencies, nonprofits and associations.

Women to Watch includes announcements of promotions, awards, business openings and milestones of business and professional women in the Tallahassee community. Submit your announcements for Women to Watch to listings@talwoman.com.

special section WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 | 35

From the desk of Dana Brooks

GIRL, LET’S TALK ABOUT ALIMONY: EMPOWERING OR PATERNALISTIC FOR WOMEN?

DANA@FASIGBROOKS.COM

ur governor recently had the opportunity to sign a piece of legislation that would change the way alimony is awarded in Florida. Instead, he vetoed it. Many believe it is because there was an argument that it could have a retroactive effect and throw a significant number of people, mostly women, into poverty. But is alimony as it currently exists fair to the payors and empowering to the recipients? The new law would have potentially allowed payors of alimony to revisit those prior court orders and reduce the amount or duration of alimony. That would have an immediate negative financial impact on the recipients. The basis behind alimony is that one party has a demonstrated need for the spousal support and the other party has an ability to pay it. If that were to suddenly change, there would be no replacement income to recipients who would then theoretically become a financial burden to the rest of society. Alimony recipients aren’t like child support recipients whose need for child support diminishes as their children grow up and leave the home. They can’t just re-enter the job market or rapidly excel in their employment in order to offset the financial loss or they wouldn’t be entitled to alimony in the first place. The concept of alimony goes back to the Code of Hammurabi where a man was obligated to pay for the lodging, food, clothing, and other necessities of a woman who bore him children so she could raise them. That’s more in keeping with modern child support but at its essence, whereas alimony is based on a presumption that a man needs to provide for a woman, be it her father or her husband, because she certainly can’t do it herself— not a very empowering premise. And until relatively recently, that was the case.

| WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 special section

Opportunities for women in the workplace were often low-level administrative jobs or in the lowest paying professions, like teaching, social work, or basic healthcare. If they worked outside the home, their wages were not enough to sustain their needs without the adjunct alimony. What about the concept of the bargain? Woman who embraced a traditional role were raised to become wives and mothers and they did that. So, when one party wanted to leave the marriage and not continue the financial support the parties had originally agreed to, it’s easy to see why the other party (usually the woman) felt short-changed. She held up her end of the bargain, shouldn’t he? Even when the woman leaves the union or cheats, she still has to eat. Her unhappiness in her marriage is not a basis to suggest that, if she wants to leave, she has to walk away with nothing after years of investing in the union. But in cases where couples get married right out of school and are together 20-25 years, they could be in their late 40s or early 50s when the marriage ends. It seems patently unfair to be obligated to support another capable human being for as long, if not longer, than the couple was actually married. It encourages dependence and discourages alimony recipients from remarrying and moving on with their lives because it often ends when they cohabit or remarry (i.e., when she finds another man to take care of her). Whether you are an alimony payor or recipient or considering your position should your marriage end, be aware that this matter is not settled. This was not the first proposed legislation to change alimony and you can bet it won’t be the last. Consult with an experienced family law attorney to learn more about your specific situation. *sponsored content

THE POWER

OF SOCIAL MEDIA By Laci Swann

ocial media has an undeniable, continually growing impact on people and the way we communicate and interact. I remember when a college email address was all that was required to sign up for Facebook. I’m really telling my age here. But anyway! From Facebook to Instagram to Tik Tok, millions upon millions of people engage each day, whether sharing pictures or articles, posting opinions, or keeping up with loved ones. This all means there’s a great deal of influence circulating, and with influence comes several positives: • An increased ability to make new friends. • A creative mode of expression. • Access to new information. • A means to keep up with loved ones. • An avenue to share information. On the flip side, people often feel overwhelmed, intimidated, or stressed by its power. After all, social media is not always rainbows and butterflies. Why? Well, here are a few reasons: • Prevalence of cyberbullying. • Lack of authenticity. • Distraction from work or school. • Pressure to keep up with others. In knowing the good and bad of these powerful platforms, choose to harness the power of social media through these three tips: 1. BE MINDFUL OF WHOM YOU FOLLOW Follow accounts that share knowledge, uplift others, and highlight information of interest to you. Avoid accounts that spread negativity, make you feel less than, frustrate you, or lead you to question your self-worth.

“Share knowledge, uplift others, and highlight information of interest to you.”

2. LOG OFF Feeling distracted by social media? Simply log off! Erase the app until you feel it’s time to circle back and engage again. There’s no harm in taking a timeout if it’s good for your sanity and soul. 3. USE IT Use it to your advantage! Looking for a recipe? Search the reel section on Instagram. Seeking workout tips? Hop on Twitter and look for tips from a professional. The options are endless, and the information is at your fingertips. special section WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 | 37

Mastering Your

ELEVATOR PITCH ELEVATOR PITCH By Renée Rivers

he thought of having to condense the very best parts of yourself into a 30–60 second speech is nerve wracking in and of itself. You imagine yourself rambling, speaking too quickly, or missing all the social cues that you would have instantly recognized if you weren’t feeling so rushed and anxious. Fear not, I am here to provide you with a few steps that, if leveraged properly, will ease your nerves and open doors to new opportunities. An elevator pitch, also known as an elevator speech, is intended to be a short, persuasive speech you use to introduce yourself and your organization or your product, like the contestants on Shark Tank. The purpose of the pitch is for you to concisely and clearly spark an interest in who you are and what you do. Whether you are attending a professional networking event, career fair, or pitching your product on Shark Tank, these five tips will help you create the spark you are looking for. 1. INTRODUCTION: Start with who you are. Include your name, where you are from, the school you attended, and your major or profession. 2. WARM-UP: Grab their attention with an interesting fact or good conversation-starting question within the context of the event 38

or meeting. For example, I recently returned from studying abroad in Europe where I was able to provide theory to local women and girls. Or did you know the city of Tallahassee will be celebrating its bicentennial in 2024? 3. PROPOSITION: Now that you have their attention, deepen the connection by describing the why. For example, I’m happy to have the opportunity to meet you because I noticed your department was seeking to fill a graduate assistantship for the upcoming semester. 4. FOLLOW-UP: Ask them to engage in a further or future conversation. You might say something to the effect of I’d love the opportunity to discuss and learn more about your research, are you available this week? 5. FINAL TIP: Try to practice your speech with friends or family before your event. The goal isn’t to repeat it verbatim, so breathe. You want the pitch to sound natural and not memorized. Condensing your experience, goals, and thoughts into a few sentences can take some time but the outcome will be a concise and striking elevator pitch that will excite your audience and help you on your way to your next opportunity!

| WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 special section

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special section WWMB Journal | October/November 2022 | 39

AT INTERNATIONAL TEA SITES

BY REGINA LYNCH-HUDSON | PHOTOGRAPHY BY COURTLAND BIVENS III

TRAVEL

As summer dissolves into autumn and temperatures dip, there’s no healthier sip than wellness in a cup. The history of tea dates back to ancient China, with records of tea sipping spanning back as early as the third century, in a medical document scripted by Hua Tuo, a Chinese physician. Many of our early foremothers, with no formal education in medicine, were prolific healers who performed the duties of doctors using curative herbal brews. Had my great-great grandmother Mary Louisa Stepp Burnette Hayden been born in 1958 instead of 1858, her legacy could have very well been that of a physician, pharmacist, or president of her own holistic nutrition company. Her skills as an herbalist and natural healer, combined with her extensive knowledge of common mountain plants of western North Carolina—golden seal, black cohosh, crushed ragweed, ginger, and garlic—enabled her to look after the health of entire families. Plants and plant extracts were used to treat every type of ailment, from indigestion to colds to flu.

na, Japan, Thailand, Bangladesh, Malawi, Uganda, Burundi, Tanzania, Myanmar, Mozambique, Rwanda, and Nepal. Rooibos tea, a favorite of mine, is consumed by South Africans around the clock as a breakfast drink, luncheon beverage, or nighttime cocktail. Caffeine-free rooibos tea offers vast health benefits, including anti-inflammatory properties. Another favorite is karkade, a refreshing red tea first introduced to me in Cairo, Egypt in 1993. Karkade boasts many medicinal properties, including regulation of blood pressure and a high C content. Africans have been consuming tea concoctions for ages for remedial benefits. Kenya has become the top tea-exporting nation around the globe for black tea, rich in antioxidants, thought to improve heart and gut health and lower cholesterol, blood pressure, and blood sugar levels.

In later years, Mary Louisa practiced her craft from a small cottage. Barely less than five feet tall, she was known as a “fierce force to reckon with,” clothed in her flowing aproned-dress, waist-length hair protectively twisted into a bun as she boiled leaves, herbs, and ingredients of Mother Nature into tea potions in a cast iron cauldron.

For centuries, antioxidant-rich green tea has been a dominant refreshment throughout Asia and has gained popularity worldwide. Admittedly, the only reason I have a kitchen is because it came with the house. Yet, thanks to worldwide excursions and tea-making demonstrations across the globe, I’ve found myself using my kitchen to concoct a medley of organic tea recipes that would make great-great-grandmother Mary Louisa proud.

So powerful are the healing properties of tea that tea is the most consumed beverage in the world, second only to water, according to the Tea Association of the USA. The world’s top tea producing countries include China, India, Kenya, Sri Lanka, Vietnam, Turkey, Iran, Indonesia, Argenti-

Babington’s Tea Room: Rome, Italy After hiking Rome’s Spanish Steps, it was time to refuel at Babington's Tea Room, a traditional English tea shop established in 1893. Located at the foot of the Spanish Steps in the Piazza di Spagna, the famed shop offers a vast array of teas carefully curated from all corners of the earth. There I devoured Babington’s red rhubarb, a blend

tallahassee woman | 40 | october • november 2022

of black Darjeeling tea enriched with hibiscus and rhubarb. The Art of the Deal: Marrakesh, Morocco Tea is the libation used to seal deals in Morocco. When hubby traded me in for 420 camels, 2 castles, 100 Arabian horses, 2 suits of Saladin armour, and 5 swords made of Moorish steel, local Berber villager Aziz and I toasted over mint tea, Morocco’s national drink. After the transaction was consummated, hubby forewarned Aziz that he didn’t know what he was getting himself into. Hokokuji Temple: Kamakura, Japan At the legendary Hokokuji Temple, renowned for its bamboo forest containing over 2000 moso trees and Japanese tea house, I sipped therapeutic green tea at dusk amid a calming cascade of magnificent bamboo stalks.

Veteran publicist and luxury lifestyle experience-aholic, Regina Lynch-Hudson, pens MadameXhales, slated towards the vintage of woman that according to studies: enjoys more time to travel, indulges in longer trips, and selects more extravagant travel accommodations. The exacting taste of MadameXhales finds her exploring destinations, cruises, resorts, spas, and extracurricular activities—where like-minded Xhalers have experienced inner-exhilaration! © Contact MadameXhales: thewritepublicist@earthlink.net tallahassee woman | 41 | october • november 2022

M MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

any businesses and organizations have either casual or formal mentoring programs for their employees. Typically, these programs pair a veteran professional with someone who is new or not quite as seasoned in the hopes that the inexperienced person will harness the knowledge and spirit of their mentor. I did not have that kind of mentoring experience. However, I am fortunate to have a circle of friends who I have come to rely on as a sounding board for various events that have occurred throughout my life journey and vice versa. We cover a wide range of topics from careers and community involvement to important personal relationships. What makes a good mentor? It is different for everyone, but I find there are some universal traits:

MENTORING THROUGH

FRIENDSHIP By Lily Etemadi

• BE A GOOD LISTENER!

Being an active listener is the most important thing about being a mentor.

• LEAD BY EXAMPLE.

The advice or feedback you are giving should match or be consistent with what you have chosen in your own life. Be a real-life example of the advice you give.

• PROVIDE MULTIPLE PERSPECTIVES AND OPTIONS.

Not every situation has a clear and obvious solution. If you provide advice for someone, know that they may take only part of it, or in some cases, not take it at all. There is no harm in your mentee taking their own way. You are there to listen and offer guidance, not insist on it.

• FOLLOW UP.

How can you help? Determine what resources you have that they may benefit from. Is there an introduction you can make? Sometimes a well-timed phone call or an “e-troduction” goes a long way. Everyone and every situation is different. Your mentoring style might vary from friend to friend and circumstance to circumstance. Sometimes a mentor needs to tell it straight. Sometimes a mentor needs to simply be the biggest fan of your mentee’s big (and not so big) accomplishments. Whatever your approach, know that the traits of being a good mentor are the same as being a good friend. Listen, be in the moment, be the example you want reciprocated, provide options, offer solutions, and follow through.

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Essential Skincare Tips for Fall

s we start sipping our pumpkin spice lattes and saying, “it’s fall y’all,” there are some other transitions we should start involving our skin. Cooler temperatures, lower humidity, and indoor heaters are changes that can affect our skin, causing irritation, dryness, and breakouts and exacerbating conditions such as eczema. To keep your skin healthy this fall, consider these tips: ■ Use hydrating creamy cleansers and store your gel cleansers until the warmer seasons. ■ Switch from lightweight moisturizers to a thicker cream or emollient. Moisturizers with active ingredients called ceramides support your skin and act as a barrier to the changing environment. ■ Back off your exfoliators and retinoids. If you are exfoliat-

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By Mayra Zimmerman, PA-C

ing regularly, it is time to give your skin a break. Use your chemical exfoliators only one to two times a week. ■ Continue to use your vitamin C serums and SPF. This can help with a brighter complexion. Wind, clouds, and shorter days can trick us into thinking we can stop with sun protection, but the sun and free radicals still penetrate through clouds during the cool months, causing sun damage and accelerating skin aging. ■ Avoid the tanning bed at all costs. Consider getting a spray tan or using self-tanner. If you are unsure on where to start with your skin routine or are due for a skin exam, book an appointment with your dermatologist for guidance and skin cancer prevention.

BEATING

BREAST CANCER By Natasha Monique Coleman

n an effort to increase awareness about the importance of cancer screening and early detection, we asked Natasha Monique Coleman with the Florida Department of Health in Leon County, five questions on improving breast health for all women. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Why is early detection for breast cancer important? Early detection is key to treating breast cancer. If breast cancer is found early, women tend to have more treatment options and a better chance for survival. The two most important recommendations to women for early detection and survival of breast cancer are to do monthly self-breast exams and yearly mammograms starting at age 40. Most women know that mammograms are important and that they should get them, but some women don’t have access or fall through the cracks. Your department has a solution, right? We sure do! We have the Florida Breast and Cervical Cancer Early Detection Program. It offers free or low-cost mammograms and clinical breast exams for women ages 50-64 who have low income and are underinsured or uninsured. An applicant must be a Florida resident living in Jefferson, Leon, Madison, Taylor, or Wakulla counties.

How can women find out more about this great program? It’s easy. We want them to call us! We are happy to break it down in plain words how to enroll in this program. People can call us at 850-404-6404 or visit our website: https://leon.floridahealth.gov What can women do to reduce their risk of breast cancer? This is a disease that affects one in eight women in the U.S. Many factors can influence your breast cancer risk. You can’t change some factors, such as getting older or your family history, but you can help lower your risk of breast cancer by keeping a healthy weight, exercising regularly, and limiting alcoholic drinks. Sounds like Breast Cancer Awareness is your mission all year round – what inspires you? For me, it is all about making a real difference to people, not only the women who can be saved through our early detection program, but also their families, friends, and dependents. Our role can be especially impactful in reducing ignorance: ensuring as many people as possible have the knowledge, information, and tools to prevent, diagnose and treat breast cancer.

The two most

important recommendations to women for early detection and survival of breast cancer are to do monthly self-breast exams and yearly mammograms starting at age 40

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

Cultivating Creativity

By Chanta Haywood

y teenage daughter came to me one evening exclaiming that she was overwhelmed that she felt all kinds of energy coursing through her blood that desperately needed to get it out. If it did not, she said, she might explode. Before I could respond, she offered a solution. To channel this raging energy, she wanted to paint the entire side wall in her bedroom. All her years she’d seen me try to bring to life any creative thought she and her siblings had by pouring money and support behind it. We’d spent hundreds of dollars in art supplies and material to encourage their artistic expressions in whatever form they took. I told her to go ahead and do the mural. And if we did not like it, she could paint over it. If I ever sold the house, we’d do the same. Just paint it. She was comfortable making this unorthodox request, and I consented because of these two ideologies I took to nurturing and encouraging my children's creative expressivity. The problems we face in the world today require

bold and innovative approaches , and as parents we can begin laying the foundation early on.

1. Eradicating the Box Instead of teaching my kids to think outside the box, I used to encourage them to think as if there was no box. It was a notion I embraced after adhering to cultural critic Thomas Friedman's admonition to embrace the impactful potential of new technologies may be creating thinking "without a box." To get my children used to eradicating creative boxes like coloring books, for example, I would give them blank sheets of paper and have them draw and color they image themselves. They became the creator and owner of the thought and how it looked. Jordan thought beyond the box by asking me to paint on the wall and by seeing the wall blank canvas on which she could engage what she was going through. If we teach children to eradicate boxes, as they get older, they will be more comfortable with coming with novel ideas and taking creative approaches to

tallahassee woman | 48 | october • november 2022

solving problems.

2. Celebrating Mistakes Rather than chastise them when they made mistakes when painting or drawing, I would encourage my children to see the beauty in the mistake. I line that went too far off course could become a stem for a flower. Though it was not intentional, it still happened, and it presented an opportunity to create something else she had not even thought of before. That’s the whole idea behind serendipity – the fortuitous outcome of something that was unsought or unexpected. We need to teach our children how to celebrate their mistakes, especially when being creative. Messing up is a part of the process, and it should be celebrated. We cannot take full credit for our children’s imagination or creativity, but we can be deliberate about giving them the freedom to think and express themselves. You may have to sacrifice a wall, but it will be worth it.

Raising Awareness Today and Beyond By Laci Swann

“I yelled at him first, so I understand why he hit me.” “I hurt her feelings, so she slapped me. It’s not a big deal.” “He had a hard day at work.” “She apologized, so I don’t think it will happen again.” “He gets mad from time to time. I can handle it.”

ave you ever heard any of those statements? They are more than statements, they are excuses for violence. However, domestic violence is never okay. Nothing should excuse violence. Victims often try to normalize abuse so that the emotional effects are less overwhelming. We must do our part to alleviate the weight of violence on their shoulders and in their lives. Studies show that domestic violence takes place nearly every 15 seconds of every day in the United States. And yet, many do not realize how many lives are affected by domestic violence. Victims of domestic violence often feel shame and embarrassment, so many of these cases are kept behind closed doors. To help victims

shed shame and create an open door for support and increased awareness, October has been named Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Throughout the month of October, education and awareness are key objectives.

As a community, we must do more than learn. We must act. Three out of four Americans know that another person has been abused or is being abused. Education without action is not enough. If you know someone in need of help, please stand up to domestic violence and call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).

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The Impact of

Domestic Violence By Maria Folsom

o you know what the leading cause of injury to women could be? How about the leading cause of death for pregnant women? The answer to both is domestic violence. Many cases go unreported, especially if the victim is a man. Every year during the month of October advocates around the nation actively educate their communities about this issue. We would like to share our experiences with domestic violence and promote ways we as a community can help. According to the FDLE’s total reported domestic violence offenses, from 2019 to 2020 Leon County increased by 16%. This includes 3 murders and 47 forcible rapes by an intimate partner. Studies continue to prove that children who witness domestic violence are at a higher risk of developing a poor quality of life and creating negative behaviors. These risks include substance abuse, animal abuse, and an overall pro-violence attitude. This crime does not just affect people in the home. Worker productivity losses are considered hidden costs of domestic violence. If a survivor is injured, they need medical attention. If a survivor needs additional protection, they need to apply for an injunction at the courthouse. A person battling these crimes may have to take off from work to utilize services. If you are interested in offering support to survivors, let us share the best way you can help - LISTEN. It is in our nature to tell people what to do, but remember that peo-

ple need to process their thoughts BEFORE any plans can be made. If you are a domestic violence survivor’s confidant, process their thoughts, feelings, and concerns first. If the conversation continues and you have let them express their fears freely, it is okay to ask if they are ready to hear suggestions. If they are ready, KNOW ABOUT LOCAL RESOURCES. Crisis hotlines, shelters, and injunction processes are great places to begin. Just remember, THEY need to figure out what is best for them and their family. It is called empowerment and advocates always promote a person’s personal life choice. For more information on local resources and details of how the Victim Advocate Unit of the Leon County Sheriff’s Office can assist you, visit our website www.leoncountyso.com.

Maria Folsom is a Victim Advocate with the Leon County Sheriff's Office. This unit assists victims of all crimes as needed on a 24/7 schedule. Maria utilizes a technique in which she is certified, called Heartmath, to assist victims and law enforcement professionals deal with traumatic situations.

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Tallahassee Woman Magazine October - November 2022

Articles inside

Publisher Letter - Dr. Michelle Mitcham

LETTER FROM GUEST EDITOR