Active Family Magazine - December 2017

DECEMBER 2017

URBAN

HOLIDAY

RETREAT Hotel Valencia

HOLIDAY

GIFT GUIDE

SANTA SIGHTINGS and Tree Lightings

[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]

y da 8 o 0 T er 0-58 t s gi 82 Re 259

KinderPrep Academy

Now Offered at The Growing Room Academy

KinderPrep Teaches:

Oral Language Skills • Listening Skills • Independence Social Skills • Basic Letter and Number Recognition Fostering and Enthusiasm for Learning

2340 SAN RAMON VALLEY BLVD · SAN RAMON · CA · THEGROWINGROOM.ORG

PERSONALIZED INSTRUCTION FOR ADULTS, CHILDREN AND TODDLERS. SUMMER CAMPS & HORSEMANSHIP CLINICS

.............................................

Coaching for the beginner and competitive show rider.

CALL NOW FOR MORE INFO:

925.960.9696

.............................................

Ask for:

Samantha Lazone & Barbara EnDean •

5111 Dolan Rd, Livermore CA 94551













Spanish Immersion Classes & Camps  Engaging curriculum uses music, art & games

 

 Experienced, dynamic teachers  Ages toddlers to teens   Small class sizes



 





r Join us fo g, in ll te story mes a g t, r a music, F f UN & TONS o l! ño - in espa

www.showstables.com

Mention ACTIVE FAMILY and receive a FREE first time trial class!

www.vivaelespanol.org • 925-962-9177 Lafayette • Pleasanton • And schools all over the Bay Area 2 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

To reunite with their families, emperor penguins migrate up to 30 miles across the ice.

You just have to make it across the rink.

Open through January 7 Explore the science behind the season and learn how Antarctic penguins survive and thrive in frozen polar ecosystems at this annual holiday exhibit. This year, falling snow flurries, wintry surprises, and an all-new holiday ice rink await!

Open every day this holiday season.

Get tickets at calacademy.org Pterosaurs: Flight in the Age of Dinosaurs is organized by the American Museum of Natural History, New York (amnh.org)

Volume 4 / Issue 47

[ PARENTING ] Capturing the Uniqueness of Your Child

12

Use this Emotional Cue to Turn Other People’s Infuriating Opinions into Your Highest Lessons

[ SEASONAL FUN ] Holiday Gift Guide

14

28

Are You Too Much of a Yes-Parent?

Museums Across the Bay Area

24

[ TRAVEL ]

22

Urban Holiday Retreat, Hotel Valencia

Ask a UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospital Expert

Santa Sightings & Tree Lightings

36

10

38

Best of Both Worlds, The Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ]

32

You still get to have a life

[ EVENTS ] December Calendar

20

8

14 4 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

20

32

See a Stanford pediatrician at Bayside Medical Group and LPSR Pediatrics

Access to Excellence.

Local Life & Style for the East Bay Area

Publisher/Editor

Marketing Assistant Interns

Contributing Authors

Tracie Brown Vollgraf

Jaida Sinclair

Advertising Sales Director

Fashion Editor

Kathy Brillheart kbrillheart@activefamilymag.com

Rachel Fawkes www.fawkeshunter.com

Advertising Sales Managers

Design/Production

Carrie Contey, Ph.D. Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. Rachel Macy Stafford Susan Newman Ph.D. Dr. Alison Matsunaga Elizabeth Kang

Mary Oakes moakes@activefamilymag.com

Teresa Agnew Craft

Active Family is published by TAG Marketing Group Mailing Address | P.O. Box 5158, Pleasanton, CA 94566

Advertising Inquiries | 925.789.0709 Email Address | info@activefamilymag.com

Editor’s Note Although it has been a struggle to make sense of the world we live in today, we truly hope that you are able to enjoy your friends and family this holiday season.

Take the time to cherish the special moments and appreciate all of the love and joy the holidays bring.

Thank you for supporting and reading Active Family Magazine. Wishing you and yours a wonderful holiday and a very happy New Year!

Tracie Brown Vollgraf Editor info@activefamilymag.com

6 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ]

Carrie Contey is an internationally recognized coach, author, speaker and educator. Her work offers a new perspective on human development, parenting and family life. She guides, supports and inspires her clients to live with wide open and courageous hearts so they can approach family life with skill, spaciousness and joy.

Carrie received her PhD in prenatal and perinatal psychology and is masterful at synthesizing and articulating the science, psychology, and spirituality of humanhood. She is the creator of “Evolve” a year-long “personal growth through parenting” program. She is also the cofounder of the Slow Family Living movement and the co-author of CALMS: A Guide To Soothing Your Baby. Carrie has appeared on NBC’s The Today Show, NPR, CBS radio and in many publications including Time, Parenting and The Boston Globe. Currently she lives, works and plays in Austin, TX but spends as much time as she can traveling, speaking, creating things that make family life more wonderful and living her very own extraordinary life to the fullest! To learn more, visit www.carriecontey.com

You still get to have a life.

by Carrie Contey, Ph.D. You love your growing people with all of your heart + soul. You’re giving so much of your time and energy to them because you deeply want them to have a fabulous life. You tend to their physical and emotional needs day in and day out. And that takes a lot of energy. Especially the emotional tending.

In the midst of caring for your family, it’s easy to rarely focus on yourself and yet, it’s critical. For you and for them.

This month I want to turn the attention toward you. Your personhood.

Yes, I’m here to say…

You still get to have a life.

And, not only do you get to have a life, it’s essential to you and to your people that you take time, even if it’s just a moment or two each day, to focus on you.

You’re really a part of this.

Your well-being matters.

Life as UNIQUELY YOU being YOU didn’t end when you welcomed these people into your world.

8 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ] You’re still learning and growing and evolving.

Need a little prompt to get the conversation between

You’re still inspired by things that are beyond the needs

you and you going? Here are some questions to ask

and interests of your kids or your partner.

yourself.

You’re still a unique being with dreams and desires and questions.

• Who am I? • What do I need?

Being a parent who values your sweet Self, continues to

• What makes me tick?

seek new experiences and grow as a person is the very

• What brings me joy?

best modeling you can do for your people. They benefit

• What helps me?

from you knowing you and evolving as a person.

• How can I care for myself?

• How can I enjoy myself for the very long haul?

Now for the fifty zillion dollar question: How can you tend

• How can I love myself today?

your personhood in the midst of everything else that has to happen in family life?

This is beyond self care – this is about being aligned with the BIG beingness of who you are, tuning into your needs

Perhaps you know the answer to this question and

and desires and listening, really listening to yourself.

perhaps you don’t. If you don’t, you can start super micro small by setting an intention just to listen to yourself —

Imagine a world where parents were supported to care

your needs, your emotions, your desires, your questions,

deeply for themselves in the midst of caring for their

etc. Even if it’s just one minute per day, give yourself that

growing people. I can.

time to hear what you have to say.

Let’s be the change.

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 9

[ TRAVEL ]

Urban Holiday Retreat, Hotel Valencia

by Elizabeth Kang It’s that time of year again. Along with the merriments of holiday parties, family get-togethers and festive cheer, comes the dreaded holiday gift shopping. If you’re like most busy parents, the thought of battling the masses and stalking for parking spaces during the holiday shopping season seems daunting, at best. Here’a a novel idea: Why not turn a ho-hum chore into an experience that’s actually enjoyable?

Make an overnight reservation at the hip and stylish Hotel Valencia, San Jose — conveniently located smack-dab in one of the best outdoor shopping experiences in the area, Santana Row. Enjoy leisurely upscale shopping, gourmet fine dining, and walking proximity to West Valley Mall. Valet your vehicle and forget about finding a parking space all weekend, because everything you need is easily walkable and accessible, right outside your hotel.

Viola! Your dreaded holiday shopping experience will be transformed into a much needed mini vacay, while you simultaneously check off everyone on your holiday gift list.

10 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

GET COZY: Hotel Valencia Santana Row is everything you want in an urban getaway; cozy, modern rooms with balconies overlooking the cityscape, luxurious outdoor lounge areas, and a gorgeous, inviting pool and hot tub, complete with bar service. The courtyard, which also serves as a wine bar, (Terrace) is the perfect spot to retreat after a day of shopping; with lovely fountains, cozy patio chairs, toasty fire pits and wine, cocktail and small bites offerings. The seasonal rooftop terrace and bar (Cielo) is a popular hangout spot after dark, and a great option to mingle and unwind while enjoying picturesque views of the Santa Cruz Mountains.

The hotel evokes an old world Spanish-style charm while managing to also look perfectly hip and modern at the same time. It’s a wonderful combination that transports you to vacation mode instantly.

Nosh: While there are plenty of great dining locations throughout Santana Row, two excellent options are located right in the hotel. As an overnight guest, be sure to take advantage of the hotel’s complimentary

[ TRAVEL ] continental buffet breakfast.

Oveja Negra is a new “globally inspired” tapas/ small plates restaurant with a minimal, yet cozy, and rustic interior. The trendy dining spot offers what chef Ocean Orssten describes as “unruly tapa.” His dishes elevate traditional Spanish-style tapas with a more unique, modern, and international flavor. Some of the seasonal, creative menu offerings include a Maine Lobster Enchilada, PB&J Foie Gras “Donuts”, as well as the restaurant’s self proclaimed signature dish — Oveja Negra Barbacoa — an overnight. slow roasted lamb shoulder served with mini bone marrow tortillas.

Vbar is a fun, casual option that’s perfect for an intimate nightcap with a loved one, or fun evening of classic Happy Hour nibbles with friends. The sleek, hip interior boasts flat-panel TVs, comfortable and intimate furnishings, and a balcony overlooking Santana Row. The menu includes delicious small bites such as Kobe beef sliders, Kampachi poke, and classic fried chicken wings.

During Happy Hour (Mon-Fri, 4-7 p.m.) select cocktails are $8, select wines and well drinks are $7, draft beers are $6, and most appetizers are $8 or less.

SHOP: With so much to see and do in Santana Row, be sure to carve out some relaxing “me time” in-between shopping and dining. You could easily spend half the day at Burke Williams Day Spa, which is located just a few feet away from Hotel Valencia. Whether you indulge in a massage, facial or other treatment, all spa guests have access to the spa’s opulent amenities, including sauna, steam room, soaking tubs, refreshments, and showers.

Stop by Lavande Nail Spa for a quick mani-pedi and

foot massage after a few hours of holiday shopping.

This popular nail spa is always bustling, but its spacious interior encourages walk-ins.

With so many retail stores located at “The Row,” you’ll be sure to check off everyone on your list. Some popular stores in Santana Row include H&M, Anthropologie, Best Buy, Crate & Barrel, Free People, Gucci, Kate Spade, Kendra Scott, Lululemon, Sephora, Tommy Bahama, Urban Outfitters, and Z Gallery, to name a few.

SPECIAL EVENTS AT “THE ROW”: Santana Row is host to a number of special events throughout the year, and the holiday season is no exception.

The Annual Tree Lighting Ceremony kicks off the Holiday Season during November, followed by the Elf on the Shelf Scavenger Hunt; a fun event for kids, also scheduled in November.

“Letters to Santa” is an ongoing event throughout the season, where children can leave their personal letters to Santa in the special mailbox next to the tree in Santana Row Park. Every child who leaves a letter is guaranteed to receive a reply from Santa before Christmas if the letter is dropped by Dec 11.

Makers Market in the Park (Dec 2) is a curated marketplace showcasing local artists selling US-made, handcrafted goods. 10 am - 6 pm.

Lululemon Athletica hosts complimentary “In-Store Yoga” on Sundays at 9:30 a.m., taught by a local, certified instructor.

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 11

[ PARENTING ] Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. is a psychoanalyst with specialized clinical training in infant-parent, child, adolescent, and adult psychotherapy. She has been on the faculties of New York University and the Society for Psychoanalytic Study and Research, among others. She has written extensively on parenting for various publications, including the Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, The International Journal of Infant Observation, The Inner World of the Mother, Newsday’s Parents & Children Magazine, Long Island Parent. She also wrote her popular column, PARENTAL INTELLIGENCE, at Moms Magazine and has been a parenting expert for numerous publications such as Good Housekeeping. and Bustle Lifestyle.

She currently writes for Active Family Magazine (San Francisco) and blogs for Huffington Post. Her new book is Unlocking Parental Intelligence: Finding Meaning in Your Child’s Behavior. To learn more

Capturing the Uniqueness of Your Child

go to Dr. Hollman’s website at

by Laurie Hollman, Ph.D.

www.lauriehollmanphd.com.

It’s so valuable to identify the uniqueness of your child. Then they feel accepted, loved, and wanted by you. While children long to belong and fit in with their peers, it’s the parent’s actual acceptance that gives them the security they need. Then “fitting in” and being like others loses its power.

If you reflect carefully you will notice that your child has certain qualities that make him or her unique. While most kids go through similar stages, all kids are different in the ways they adapt to the changes in their cognitive growth, bodily changes, and personality development. They also adapt differently to various environments that they are exposed to including home, school, and extra-curricular activities.

How to Think About the Uniqueness of Your Child Think about how you would describe your child to yourself. Consider in depth their emotional being. What are they sensitive to and what do they brush off as unimportant? How do they fare with both humor and more intense concerns?

12 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ PARENTING ] Do they articulate themselves easily or must we be

to talk more at that time than right after school. Leave

sensitive to the messages sent off by their behavior?

enough leeway time in the evening bedtime routine to be able to chat with your child. Before reading to

Some kids have a facility with words and are very verbal,

them, the frequent bed time activity, ask them what

others less so. But what do they express? Can they share

was important to them in their day? They may not have

emotions as well as practical daily matters? Do they

thought about their day in this way, so it builds their

come to you with problems or do they keep themselves

capacity to get to know themselves better, just as you

close to the vest?

are getting to know them, too. Try not to interrupt them when their words are flowing by asking lots of questions,

Are they open with what excites them or do you need to take the initiative in learning what inspires them? Do they understand the notion of feeling inspired or do you need to explain to them how different people focus on different choices of activities that motivate them?

Help them understand how their peers are similar and different from them in their choices and let them know that that’s just fine.

What is your child’s general disposition or temperament?

though a question now and then may deepen what they are telling you. But if you interrupt too often this may steer them away from what’s most significant to them. You also might then paraphrase some of what they’ve said, so they know you really get it.

Accepting Your Child’s Uniqueness Builds Self-Esteem

Ultimately a parent’s approval of their unique child helps

Are they always full of energy or more laid back or

their child accept themselves and develop in their own

somewhere in between? Do they know that you are

way at their own pace. When they know you value and

aware of these qualities and that you accept them?

accept their personal qualities it builds their sense of self

How to Learn What is Important to Your Child

and fosters positive self-esteem. As your child grows your

You will create a special bond with your child if they

acceptance of them builds your relationship and brings

know you are interested in what’s important to them.

you closer together in positive rewarding ways.

We often take for granted that they know that we are aware of what interests them. But do we talk about it, so they know we appreciate what gives them pleasure or dissatisfaction with themselves?

Lots of conversations with your kids about what occurs in their daily lives is valuable to building the parent-child relationship. Sympathize with their frustrations without having to solve their problems for them. Just discuss what’s on their minds and see the way they come to solutions. If they want advice, surely give it, but not right off. Learn first what their thoughts and feelings are about a given topic.

Nighttime is when defenses are down. They may want DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 13

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Gift GUIDE

0 to 2 PLAYFUL PONY | This Norse horse is packed with multiple play surfaces, bead runs, peg mazes and more. Teaches cause and effect learning while fostering fine motor skill development and hand-eye coordination. Ages 12 months+ www.manhattantoy.com.

WINKELS LION | The classic Winkel now features a sweet little animal face! An adorable lion face has been placed inside the classic Winkel loop structure for added engagement. The ZooWinkel is the perfect rattle teether toy for newborns and teething babies.

Ages 0+ www.manhattantoy.com.

BRILLIANT BEAR MAGNETIC STACK-UP | Stacking play is here to stay! This colorful wood stacker includes magnetized connecting discs that allow for easy stacking. Ages 9 months+ www.manhattantoy.com.

14 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Gift GUIDE

3 to 5 ARRGH! THE PIRATE | Features 15 pieces of magnetic stacking blocks. Create a 3D toy Pirate or use your imagination to stack and arrange these magnetic blocks in hundreds of different ways. Ages 3+ www.manhattantoy.com.

MIO CASTLE + HORSE + 4 PEOPLE | Rearrange the castle towers, walls and ladders in hundreds of different ways to build castles to your heart’s content! Ages 3+ www.manhattantoy.com. BRIO MY FIRST TAKE ALONG SET | Now even the littlest conductors can play trains anywhere! Simply open the special carry-along case, and start your engines. Includes My First Engine with bell wagon, train tracks, two patented ramps and carry bag with handle. 18 months+ www.amazon.com. MAGNAFLEXTM | Creative construction kits help inspire kids of all ages to flex their imagination and build anything they can imagine. Ages 4+ www.wowwee.com.

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 15

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Gift GUIDE

5 to 10

GRAVITY MAZE | Kids love marble runs and Gravity Maze kicks it up with the added challenge of a logic puzzle.

Available on Amazon, Target, Toys R Us, Barnes &Noble, and in neighborhood toy stores. Ages 8+ YOGA SPINNER | Simultaneously stimulate and calm the mind while encouraging teamwork and physical activity.

Available on Amazon and in neighborhood toy stores. Ages 5+ ZINGO! | Time-telling is a fun way to learn to read a clock. Slide the Zinger to reveal hours and minutes like a digital clock, then look for matches on your cards that show an analog clock with hour and minute hands. Available on Amazon and in neighborhood toy stores. Ages 5+ XTRONAUT | Designed by space-mission experts. Experience science and thrills of exploring the solar system! Do you have what it takes to put together a space mission and race through the solar system? Purchase at www.amazon. com. CODE & GO™ ROBOT MOUSE ACTIVITY SET AND CODE & GO™ PROGRAMMABLE ROBOT MOUSE | The race is on to build hands-on coding skills! Build your maze, and then use the coding cards to create a step-by- step path for Colby, the Programmable Robot Mouse. Ages 5+ www.learningresources.com. BOTSQUAD | This hardworking, interactive BotSquad leader is a jack of all trades. GRiP’s got speed, turns on a dime, and can grab and haul some serious loads.

Ages 5+ www.wowwee.com/botsquad. FINGERLINGS | With Fingerlings, fun is always close at hand. Literally! These baby monkeys cling to your fingers and go where you go. They react to sound, motion and touch, make fun little monkey noises, and move in ways that will make you squeal with delight. Ages 5+ www.fingerlings.com.

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Tween SUSPICION™ GAME | A Game of Secret Identity and Deduction. You’re invited to a masquerade party at the estate of art collector Baron Whitetooth. Little does he know, you’re a world-class jewel thief. Keep your identity a secret as you maneuver through the mansion pocketing priceless gemstones.

Ages 10+ www.wonderforge.com.

KRAZY WORDZ GAME | In this outrageous game of weird words, you’ll want to put your creativity and quickwittedness into high gear to win! Ages 10+ www.ravensburger.com.

Gift GUIDE

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 17

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Gift GUIDE

Teen

THE ULTIMATE KANJAM PACK | More bang for your buck! Enjoy hours of fun with the complete KanJam Ultimate Disc Game with a Glow-in- the-Dark Accessory Kit! www.kanjam.com.

UNICORN NEON LIGHT | When the sun doesn’t shine, the light show does. Add some summer fun to your space with the Unicorn Neon Light. Ages 12+ www.sunnylife.com. FLAMINGO NEON LIGHT | Flamingos shine brighter in neon. Make any corner of your space a little showier with a Vegas inspired Flamingo Neon Light. Ages 12+ www.sunnylife.com.

BEACH SOUNDS TURQUOISE | Share your favorite music with Sunnylife’s iconic Beach Sounds. Water and sand resistant.

Works with any smart phone or tablet. Ages 12+ www.sunnylife.com.

CABLEYOYO | Cableyoyo is an earbud cord spool with a magnetic center to keep earphones tidy and tangle-free while enabling quick winding and unwinding. www.bluelounge.com.

18 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

THE HYPNOTIC JELLYFISH AQUARIUM | The LED-lighted desktop aquarium has two synthetic jellyfish that provide mesmerizing ambiance just like their real counterparts. Ages 12+ www.hammacher.com.

THE PULSING PLASMA WIRELESS SPEAKER | This is the Bluetooth speaker that generates a show of kinetic light inside a desktop plasma globe. Ages 12+ www.hammacher.com. ILLUMINATE LED SOCCER BALL | The after-after- after hour game. The Illuminate LED Soccer Ball glows bright and will keep your game going for hours once the sun goes down. www.kanjam.com. SANCTUARY4 | Sanctuary4 is a four-port multi device charging valet for tablets and phones.With 4-amps of power, there is plenty of juice to quickly charge multiple devices at the same time. www.bluelounge.com.

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 19

[ EVENTS ]

December Alameda County DECEMBER 1 Starlight Movie in the Park: Elf Memorial Parkway Alameda 5:45pm – 10pm www.alamedaca.gov/recreationuncategorized/events/5281 Preschool Performance Series Village Theatre and Art Gallery Danville 10am www.villagetheatreshows.com Jack Long Square Tree Lighting Jack London Square Oakland 5pm – 7pm www.jacklondonsquare.com Holiday Shorts- A Long Winter’s Tale Firehouse Arts Center Pleasanton 7:30pm www.firehousearts.org/events/ coi-holiday-shorts-2017-a-longwinters-tale

DECEMBER 1 -23 Annie The Julia Morgan Theater Berkeley 1pm & 7pm www.berkeleyplayhouse.org

DECEMBER 2 Hometown Holiday Parade Downtown Pleasanton Pleasanton 5pm www.hometownholiday.com Email info@activefamilymag.com to subscribe to our weekly email blast for more events!

Breakfast With Santa Stoneridge Shopping Center Pleasanton 8am – 10:30pm www.eventbrite.com/e/breakfastwith-santa-at-stoneridgetickets-39672212656

20 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

DECEMBER 2 - 3

DECEMBER 1 -2

Holidays in the Vineyards Various Wineries Livermore Times Vary www.lvwine.org/event/3072/ holidays-in-the-vineyards

Once Upon a Christmas Lesher center for the Arts Walnut Creek Times Vary www.theballetschool.org

DECEMBER 3

Holiday Wreath Making Forest Home Farms San Ramon 11am – 2pm www.ci.san-ramon.ca.us

Snow Day Gourmet Ghetto Berkeley 10am – 3pm www.anotherbullwinkelshow.com

DECEMBER 2

DECEMBER 2 - 3

Caring Santa Stoneridge Shopping Center Pleasanton 8:30am – 10am www.eventbrite.com/e/caringsanta-tickets-38079462698

Craft Fest 2017 Bedford Gallery Walnut Creek 10am – 4pm www.bedfordgallery.org/programs/ craft-fest

Brunch with Santa Claremont Club & Spa Berkeley 10am -2pm www.fairmont.com/claremontberkeley/promotions/holidayevents

Teddy Bear Tea The Gardens at Heather Farm Walnut Creek 11am & 3pm www.gardenshf.org/teddy-bear-tea

DECEMBER 9 Holiday Nature Crafts UC Botanical Garden Berkeley 10am – 12pm www.events.berkeley.edu

DECEMBER 17 Baby Rave Bay Area Children’s Theatre Oakland 10am www.bactheatre.org/babyrave

DECEMBER 5 Free First Tuesday Bedford Gallery Walnut Creek 12pm – 5pm www.bedfordgallery.org

DECEMBER 7 -17 A Christmas Carol Lesher Center for the Arts Walnut Creek Times Vary www.centerrep.org

DECEMBER 8 - 10

Contra Costa County

A Sweet Dream Nutcracker Orinda Library Auditorium Orinda Times Vary www.orindaballetacademy.com

DECEMBER 1 -3

DECEMBER 8

DECEMBER 25 CHRISTMAS DAY

The Littlest Santa Village Theatre Danville Times Vary www.villagetheatreshows.com

Winter Ballet Gala Del Valle Theater Walnut creek 7:30pm – 9pm www.communityarts.org

[ EVENTS ]

December DECEMBER 9

DECEMBER 1 - 3

Holiday on the Farm Forest Home Farms San Ramon 11am – 3pm www.ci.san-ramon.ca.us

Joy! A Holiday Show Tandy Beal & Company San Jose Times Vary www.tandybeal.com/joy

DECEMBER 9 - 17

DECEMBER 2

Valley Dance Theatre Bankhead Theater Livermore Times Vary www.valleydancetheatre.com

Music for Families Davies Symphony Hall San Francisco 2pm www.sfsymphony.org

DECEMBER 10

Teddy Bear Tea Portola Valley Theatre Conservatory Portola Valley 10am – 12pm www.pvtc-ca.org/teddy-bear-tea

Holiday Teddy Bear Tea Lafayette Park Hotel & Spa Lafayette 12pm – 2pm www.lafayetteparkhotel.com Impressions of the Nutcracker Dougherty Valley Performing Arts Center San Ramon 1pm – 2:15pm www.srvda.com

DECEMBER 2, 9 & 16

DECEMBER 25

DECEMBER 3

CHRISTMAS DAY

Girls on the Run 5k Golden Gate Park San Francisco 9am www.gotrbayarea.org/race/51girls-on-the-run-5k

Out of Area DECEMBER 1 Family Night CuriOdyssey San Mateo 10am – 8pm www.curiodyssey.org/activities/ family-events Free First Friday’s Museum of Art & History Santa Cruz 10am – 8pm www.santacruzmah.org Make Your Own Snow Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Library San Jose 4pm www.sjpl.org

Planetarium Shows Fujitsu Planetarium Cupertino Times Vary www.planetarium.deanza.edu

DECEMBER 5 Holiday Heroes with Barry Bonds AT&T Park San Francisco 5:445pm – 8:30pm www.holidayheroes.eventbrite.com

DIY Art: Festive Fun San Jose Museum of Art San Jose 1pm – 3pm www.sjmusart.org/event/diy-artfestive-fun-dec-2017 Family Night Hike & Campfire Nature Bridge Golden Gate Sausalito 5:30pm – 8pm www.naturebridge.org/goldengate/family-adventures

DECEMBER 16 - 20 Home Alone Movie with Live Orchestra Davies Symphony Hall San Francisco Times Vary www.sfsymphony.org/BuyTickets/2017-18/Home-Alone. aspx

DECEMBER 25 CHRISTMAS DAY

DECEMBER 31 32nd Annual Japanese New Year’s Bell-Ringing Ceremony Asian Art Museum San Francisco 11:30am www.asianart.org/regular/bellringing Noon Year’s Eve Bay Area Discovery Museum Sausalito 9am – 2pm www.bayareadiscoverymuseum. org/event/noon-years-eve

DECEMBER 9 Opera for Families OFJCC Palo Alto 10:30am www.paloaltojcc.org/Events/ opera-for-families-18

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 21

[ PARENTING ]

Are You Too Much of a Yes-Parent?

by Susan Newman, Ph.D. Susan Newman, Ph.D., social psychologist, blogs for Psychology Today Magazine and is the author of The Case for the Only Child: Your Essential Guide (HCI), Under One Roof Again: All Grown Up and (Re)learning to Live Together Happily(Lyons Press), The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It--and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever(McGraw-Hill), Parenting an Only Child: The Joys and Challenges of Raising Your One and Only(Broadway/Doubleday), and Little Things Long Remembered: Making Your Children Feel Special Every Day (Iron Gate Press), others.

See: www.susannewmanphd.com Follow me on Twitter and Sign Up for my free Monthly Family Life Alert Newsletter.

When something needs to be done, you’re the one to do it. You’re the go-to person in your family and among your friends—the one who buys the gifts, sends the flowers, copes with the emergencies, keeps everyone up-to-date on what everyone else is doing even if you work outside the home. You plan parties, and more often than not they are held at your house. You drive—and drive and drive—your children and everyone else’s. It often feels as if you’re the only reliable person you know. The trouble is: Everyone else thinks that way, too. Especially your children. They know you are a Yes-Parent.

Park Your Guilt At times it seems a child’s needs involve you in different and demanding ways every waking minute. You have every right to say no to a child who asks to stay up later than you think healthy as you do to an adult child who seeks dollars to start a seemingly risky venture. Parenting is a forever proposition. You’ll be saying no—or should be—for decades so park your guilt.

When you say yes to your children’s every want and whim, you wind up saying no to yourself, being overwhelmed and exhausted. You simply can’t be a happy, effective parent if you always function on overload.

Children have no trouble saying no. But, it’s a word you want to avoid because it sets your guilt meter running especially where your children are

22 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ PARENTING ] concerned. You don’t want to disappoint them or make

each week driving (and waiting for) one of her daughters

them unhappy.

who attends swim practice early mornings and again in the afternoon with meets on weekends.

How Much of a Yes-Parent Are You? If three of these sounds vaguely like you, it’s likely that your children turn you into a yes-person quite easily. It’s time to take stock and learn how to say no.

1. At least one room in your home looks like a toy store.

2. At any given hour the couch doubles as a trampoline, a wrestling mat, a hiding place or arts and crafts

When you hit a “gray area” such as the one above, listen to your gut feeling. Can you afford to invest even more time driving your child to and from practices, lessons, and competitions? What will it take away from other children in your family? From your job? Do I really have the time? How much stress will it add?

center.

3. Your child wears his Halloween costume to school in February.

4. You’re on a first-name basis with the workers at McDonald’s.

When you say yes to your children indiscriminately, they control the pace, tenor and direction of your life: buy me, drive me, help me, finish this for me. By calling up a no when you need it, you gain a bit of deserved time for

5. Your child has everything her best friend has.

yourself and equally important, no prepares your child

6. Your six-year-old stays up so late that he can fill you in

for the “real” world.

on Jay Leno’s monologue from the night before.

7. Your daughter’s last birthday party was more elaborate than your wedding.

8. You have three dogs, two kittens, and a parakeet who all hang out around the fish tank.

9. You spend most Saturday evenings in the movie theatre parking lot waiting for your children and their friends.

10. You spend Sunday evenings writing history reports and crafting science projects you found out about

No teaches children important lessons—how to cope with disappointment, how to argue, how to strike a balance between work and play, time management and task prioritization—essential experiences that aren’t always taught in school. When children grow up learning these concepts, they are more likely to be successful in their academics, relationships, and later on, in their careers.

during dinner.

11. The text messaging charges are bigger than your monthly cell phone fee.

12. Your child’s band equipment takes up both parking spaces in the garage.

Saying NO is Your Right In The Book of No: 365 Ways to Say It and Mean It—and Stop People-Pleasing Forever, I point out that you have certain rights. Among them: Using no to get your life in control and to be in control of it, requesting details

NO Teaches Life Lessons In some situations no is the obvious answer, but what happens when your child asks to add another extracurricular to her already-full schedule? You’re proud of her initiative and want her to excel, but at the same time, your brain is calculating the extra costs, both monetary and physical, that will result if you give permission.

before committing, refusing anyone, including your children, who insists on an immediate answer. Exercising your “no” rights will change how you think when your children’s requests seem excessive, unnecessary or impossible to meet given your other commitments.

You want to be a “great” parent, but I’m pretty sure your children will find something else to fault you for

“I don’t look at the [monetary] expenses. Mostly it’s

when they are adults. It won’t be the pet monkey,

the time and the driving, and I hate driving,” says one

age-inappropriate movie or latest electronic gizmo you

harried mother of three who spends 28 hours or more

denied them during their growing years.

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 23

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Museums

Across the Bay Area

ALAMEDA COUNTY Pacific Pinball Museum 1510 Webster Street Alameda 510.769.1349 www.pacificpinball.org Lawrence Hall of Science 1 Centennial Drive Berkeley 510.642.5132 www.lawrencehallofscience.org

Phoebe A. Hearst Museum of Antrhopology 103 Kroeber Hall Berkeley (510) 642-3682 www.hearstmuseum.berkeley.edu Habitot Children’s Museum 2065 Kittredge Street Berkeley 510.647.1111 www.habitot.org

Berkeley Art Museum and Pacific Film Archive 2625 Durant Avenue Berkeley 510.643.0808 www.bampfa.berkeley.edu

The Niles Depot 37592 Niles Boulevard Fremont 510.797.4449 www.nilesdepot.org

UC Berkeley Museum of Paleontology 1101 Valley Life Science Building Berkeley 510.642.1821 www.ucmp.berkeley.edu

Children’s Natural History Museum 4074 Eggers Drive Fremont 510.790.6284 www.cnhm.msnucleus.org

The Magnes Collection of Jewish Art and Life 2121 Allston Way Berkeley 510.643.2526 www.magnes.org

Chabot Space & Science Center 10000 Skyline Boulevard Oakland 510.336.7300 www.chabotspace.org

24 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

Oakland Aviation Museum Oakland International Airport Oakland 510.638.7100 www.oaklandaviationmuseum.org Junior Center of Art and Science 558 Bellevue Avenue Oakland 510.839.5777 www.juniorcenter.org Museum of Children’s Arts: MOCHA 1625 Clay Street #100 Oakland 510.465.8770 www.mocha.org Oakland Museum of California 1000 Oak Street Oakland 510.318.8400 www.museumca.org

CONTRA COSTA Blackhawk Automotive Museum Blackhawk Plaza 3700 Blackhawk Plaza Circle Danville 925.736.2277 www.blackhawkmuseum.org

[ SEASONAL FUN ] NASA’s Ames Research Center Moffett field Mountain View 650.604.5000 www.nasa.gov/centers/ames/home/

De young Museum 50 Hagiwara Tea Garden Drive San Francisco 415.750.3600 www.deyoung.famsf.org

Moffett Field Museum 126 Severyns Avenue Mountain View 650.964.4024 www.moffettfieldmuseum.org

International Art Museum of America 1025 Market Street San Francisco 415.376.6344 www.iamasf.org

Junior Museum & Zoo 1451 Middlefield Road Palo Alto 650.329.2111 www.cityofpaloalto.org/gov/depts/csd/ jmz

Museum of Craft and Design 2569 3rd Street San Francisco 415.773.0303 www.sfmcd.org

Richmond Art Center 2540 Barrett Avenue Richmond 510.620.6772 www.richmondartcenter.org

Palo Alto Art center 1313 Newell Road Palo Alto 650.329.2366 www.cityofpaloalto.org/gov/depts/csd/ artcenter

Walnut Creek Model Railroad Society 2751 Buena Vista Avenue Walnut Creek 925.937.1888 www.wcmrs.org

Hiller Aviation Museum 601 Skyway Road San Carlos 650.654.0200 www.hiller.org

Bedford Gallery 1601 Civic Drive Walnut Creek 925.295.1417 www.bedfordgallery.org

African American Art & Culture Complex 762 Fulton Street San Francisco 415.922.2049 www.aaacc.org

OUT OF AREA Peninsula Museum of Art 1777 California Drive Burlingame 650.692.2101 www.peninsulamuseum.org

Contemporary Jewish Museum 736 Mission Street San Francisco 415.655.7800 www.thecjm.org

Santa Cruz Children’s Museum of Discovery 1855 41st Avenue Capitola 888.424.8035 www.sccmod.org

Children’s Creativity Museum 221 4th Street San Francisco 415.820.3320 www.creativity.org

De Anza Fujitsu Planetarium 21250 Stevens Creek Boulevard Cupertino 408.864.8814 www.planetarium.deanza.edu Japanese Gardens 22325 N 3rd Street Hayward 510.881.6715 www.haywardrec.org

Asian Art Museum 200 Larkin Street San Francisco 415.581.3500 www.asianart.org Cartoon Art Museum 655 Mission Street San Francisco 415.227.8666 www.cartoonart.org

Palace of the Legion of Honor 100 34th Avenue San Francisco 415.750.3600 www.legionofhonor.famsf.org San Francisco Center for the Book 375 Rhode Island Street San Francisco 415.565.0545 www.sfcb.org

San Francisco Children’s Art Center Fort Mason Center San Francisco 415.771.0292 www.childrensartcenter.org San Francisco Museum of Modern Art 151 3rd Street San Francisco 415.357.4000 www.sfmoma.org California Academy of Sciences 55 Music Concourse Drive San Francisco 415.379.8000 www.calacademy.org

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 25

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

Museums

Across the Bay Area

Exploratorium Pier 15, The Embarcadero San Francisco 415.528.4444 www.exploratorium.edu

De Saisset Museum 500 El Camino Real Santa Clara 408.554.4528 www.scu.edu/deSaisset

San Jose Tech Museum 201 S Market St San Jose 408.294.8324 www.thetech.org

San Francisco Cable Car Museum 1201 Mason St San Francisco 415.474.1887 www.cablecarmuseum.org

Triton Museum of Art 1505 Warburton Aveue Santa Clara 408.247.3754 www.tritonmuseum.org

The Walt Disney Family Museum 104 Montgomery St San Francisco 415.345.6800 www.waltdisney.org

San Jose Museum of Quilts and Textiles 520 S 1st Street San Jose 408.971.0323 www.sjquiltmuseum.org

Santa Cruz Museum of Art and History 705 Front Street Santa Cruz 831.429.1964 www.santacruzmah.org

Children’s Discovery Museum 180 Woz Way San Jose 408.298.5437 www.cdm.org

Bay Area Discovery Museum 557 McReynolds Road Sausalito 415.339.3900 www.baykidsmuseum.org

26 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

Ranked Top 10 Diabetes & Endocrinology Neonatology UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospitals, with campuses in San Francisco and Oakland, rank among the country’s best in 9 specialties, and Best in Bay Area in 6 specialties.

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ]

Use this Emotional Cue to Turn Other People’s Infuriating Opinions into Your Highest Lessons

by Rachel Macy Stafford

Rachel Macy Stafford is a certified special education teacher with a Master’s Degree in education and ten years of experience working with parents and children. In December 2010, this life-long writer felt compelled to share her journey to let go of distraction and grasp what really matters by creating the blog “Hands Free Mama.” Using her skills as a writer, teacher, and encourager, Rachel provides readers with simple, non-intimidating, and motivating methods to let go of distraction and connect with their loved ones. Rachel’s work has been featured on CNN, Good Morning America, Global News, USA Today, TIME.com, MSN.com, The Huffington Post, and Reader’s Digest. Her blog currently averages one million visitors a month. Rachel’s new book, HANDS FREE MAMA, is a New York Times Bestseller.

“Everything you thought was true Look at what it’s done for you You scream into the sky Hallelujah In due time, in due time.”

–Noah Kahan, Hallelujah Over the past year, I’ve struggled with some of the opinions expressed by people I’ve known and cared about for many years. The stances these individuals take on controversial issues plaguing our country continue to surprise and dishearten me. When I hear these differing views and opinions on deeply important issues, I feel anger rise up within me and the urge to cut ties. This reaction is not loving or unifying. It is not healthy or helpful. As much as I remind myself they are entitled to their opinion as much as I am, I still feel ill will. My unloving reaction to a friend or family member’s differing opinion is something I’ve wanted to change, but I haven’t known how … until recently.

It was while I was venting to my teenage daughter about an aggressive viewpoint expressed by a close friend that I received the guidance I’ve been searching for.

My 14-year-old daughter said, “Your friend doesn’t know what you know. She has not had the same experiences you have.” Then Natalie told me what she did when a classmate made a political statement that hurt and offended a group of students. She reached out to one of the alienated people so she would know my daughter was with her. My daughter could tell by the person’s

28 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ] reaction and the end result that her loving action had been a helpful one.

highest lessons, not someone else’s.”

Each time I use my Cue to Love, this is what I find:

My daughter went on to say, “I could argue with someone about their opinion – which probably won’t change anything – or I could do something good. And that DOES change things.”

Basically, one student’s divisive action became my daughter’s cue to do the opposite – to unify … to include … to stand beside.

The people I most disagree with provide my greatest opportunities for growth.

The people I find most difficult to love stretch me to be my most loving self.

The people I find most challenging help me face my biggest obstacles to becoming who I most want to be.

I immediately thought of William James, the father of American psychology, who said, “Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not.”

I could argue with these people about their opinion or cut off communication, but that leaves little chance for progress, growth, and peace. Instead, I will take my daughter’s lead, and use their divisive stance as a cue to love.

Natalie and Dr. James helped me realize I was allowing my negative feelings to put me in a place of inaction— with the possibility of making the situation even worse.

With their help, I am in the process of adopting a healthier and more helpful reaction to opinions and views that upset me. I call it: Cue to Love.

In just a matter of days, I’ve been given great opportunity. With strong opinions flying on mass shootings, election results, aiding natural disasters, and political decisions that impact many, I’ve had many cues to love. Instead of feeling my blood boil by the opinions of some, I have been inspired to act with love.

It looks like this:

I sent several care packages to people I’ve never met who needed lifting.

Another person’s closemindedness is my cue to be curious instead of defensive.

Another person’s shaming language is my cue to speak words of acceptance.

Another person’s hostility is my cue to be a peacemaker.

Another person’s arrogance is my cue to gain understanding.

I offered an overdue apology to my husband.

I brainstormed fundraising ideas for homeless cats.

I baked cookies with my daughter and took them to a neighbor.

I gave some furniture to a family in need.

I supported a small, local business owner.

Another person’s quick-to-judge attitude is my cue to remember we’re more alike than different.

Another person’s vitriol towards a group of people is my cue to love all in abundance.

It’s easy to see how accepting cues to love when we feel most unloving is helpful to the world as a whole, but taking these cues greatly benefit us at a personal level.

One of my favorite enlightenment authors, Marianne Williamson writes, “Growth comes from focusing on our

I smiled warmly at every person I passed on the street.

As I experienced a frustrating political discussion with someone I care deeply about the other night, I kept reminding myself this discussion was my cue to love.

That’s when I saw the same maintenance worker I’d seen three hours earlier. I’d noticed how sad and tired he looked as he picked up other people’s empty food containers and mess. It was now almost eleven o’clock, DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 29

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ] and he was cleaning the long corridor. I walked up with a smile and said, “I really appreciate your hard work and how clean you keep everything around here.”

If kindness, love, or acceptance is the VERY NEXT THING this hurting person encounters, his view of the world instantly changes. The whole world is suddenly not against him. The world is suddenly a bit more hopeful.

The man’s eyebrows raised to the middle of his forehead and the corners of his mouth lifted into a radiant smile.

Placing one hand over his heart, the man accepted my small cash tip with his other hand.

“Wow. Thank you,” he said with tears in his eyes. “Have a wonderful night, ma’am.”

I walked away feeling tears forming in my own eyes. That is when I experienced the most hopeful epiphany of all: My job is not to change the opinions of those hurting people with their views. My job is to change the view of the world for one hurting person using love.

Think through this scenario with me for a moment:

I would want that for my unique child.

I would want that for my aging parent.

I would want that for my grieving brother.

I would want that for my exiled sister.

I would want that for you.

I would want that for me.

I’m done feeling angry, bitter, and hopeless when someone shares a polarizing viewpoint. That is now my cue to love. Because an act of love at the precise moment it’s needed can literally change the world.

If you need proof, simply look for your brother – the one with sad eyes and hunched shoulders. Watch what happens when you let him know you see him and you

A person is alienated by the shaming words of someone while riding on the subway. He proceeds through his day, feeling alone, devalued, and perhaps even scared.

Celma’s Housecleaning Service celmaoliveira789@yahoo.com

celebrate his existence. It’s enough to make HOPE pulse through your veins, and that’s so much better than the alterative.

Century Landscape & Gardening Residential and Business Maintenance All work Guaranteed!

(925) 826-6397 Free Estimates Landscaping Maintenance Sprinklers

Offering meticulous & affordable housecleaning for busy families!

References Available!

30 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

Call Today 925-819-0266

centurylandscape55@hotmail.com

[ TRAVEL ]

Best of Both Worlds, The Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua

by Elizabeth Kang As we continue with our four-part Maui series, this

and crystal turquoise waters that beckon memorable

month’s featured hotel focuses on luxury, romance,

snorkeling. With six on-site dining experiences to choose

and adventure. The Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua is exactly

from, a luxurious spa, sparkling pools complete with

what you’d expect from a world-class, luxury resort. It’s

shaded cabanas, and a tennis and basketball court,

serene, contemporary and breathtaking, with a top-

the Ritz-Carlton ensures the best of both worlds; serene

notch staff that exudes hospitality and accommodation.

relaxation and invigorating adventure.

If you’re looking for the ultimate tropical romantic

ACCOMMODATIONS:

getaway, the Ritz-Carlton, Kapalua is the perfect

The magnificent one-and two-bedroom rooms, suites

choice.

and residences have been newly renovated, and are stylish, minimal and cozy. Ranging from 440-2550 square

The resort sits atop a small bluff just north of Maui’s

feet with designer kitchenettes or full kitchens, they

Kaanapali Breach, and the picturesque location offers

provide plenty of space and are perfect for couples

so much to see and do. The 54-acre property boasts

and families alike. Guests choose from garden-view,

pristine, swimmable beaches, two championship

ocean-view, or ocean-front rooms. The separate

golf courses, lush rainforests for hiking and exploring,

living spaces include pull-out sofa beds for additional

32 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ TRAVEL ]

sleeping space. The gourmet kitchens are sleek and

fish is sourced from within the state. Menu highlights

stylish, and fully functional with countertop bar seating,

include “Grilled He’e Octopus,” “Grass-Fed Filet &

top-of-the-line appliances, and rich wood cabinets.

Seared Foie Gras Ala Mode,” and a “20 oz Steamed

Bathrooms feature marble countertops, oversized

Hawaiian Snapper” to share. The restaurant also

soaking tubs and separate showers. Two-bed suites

specializes in “garden to glass” cocktails, which

offer both two baths and two separate balconies. True

feature fresh local fruits, herbs and indigenous

to Ritz-Carlton service standards, housekeeping comes

flowers.

twice daily, and newspaper delivery is available on request.

• The Terrace is a buffet breakfast restaurant which overlooks the resort’s sparkling pool and beautiful gardens. Diners can enjoy a wide array of breakfast

DINING: Dining choices are abundant on the property, and range from super casual grab-n-go, to gourmet farmto-table.

options, including a made-to-order omelet station and Bloody Mary bar.

• Alaloa Lounge is a fun, casual evening spot to hang out and enjoy light appetizers and cocktails while taking in live, nightly entertainment.

• The Banyan Tree is a dinner-only, ocean view

• Burger Shack, open for lunch, serves mouthwatering

restaurant offering seasonal, farm-to-table food with

burgers, fries and shakes, as well as cocktails, on the

an emphasis on fresh seafood and hawaiian flavors.

beachside, alfresco.

Produce sourced from the resort’s own two-acre farm, or from nearby local farms, while meat and

• The Pool Bar & Cafe also serves lunch in an alfresco setting, with menu items such as sandwiches, salads, DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 33

[ TRAVEL ]

smoothies and tropical drinks.

• Aina Gourmet is a quick grab-n-go breakfast and

Tennis — All guests can take advantage of the two ocean-view tennis courts on the property, as well as

lunch option featuring wraps, salads and homemade

professional, expert instruction and hands-on junior

pastries using local, organic and seasonal ingredients.

clinics for younger players.

ON-SITE ACTIVITIES:

Pool/Cabanas — Lounge in style by the sparkling three-

Golf — Golf enthusiasts and beginners alike will

tiered pool in one of three cabana choices, which

appreciate the resort’s picturesque 18-hole course. The

range from $75 to $450 per day. Depending on the

Plantation Course sits on what used to be a 22,000 acre

cabana style, cabanas include unlimited drinks, and

pineapple plantation, and it offers both a challenging

various nibbles.

game and gorgeous views. Personal instruction is available, as well as multi-day group instruction.

Spa/Fitness Center — Take advantage of the 24-hr fitness facility or various fitness classes the resort has

Ritz Kids — For families traveling with “keiki’s,” be sure to

to offer, including yoga and pilates. Or just relax and

register with the fun and interactive Ritz Kids program,

indulge in a luxury spa treatment at the on-site Spa.

which includes welcome packet with coloring books and a scavenger hunt. Ritz Kids also receive a welcome

EXCURSIONS:

card and in-room toy, as well as awesome menu

Luaus — No Hawaiian vacation is complete without

offerings designed with little one’s palates in mind at all

attending a traditional luau, and the Ritz-Carlton

hotel restaurants.

is situated near plenty of great ones. Simply ask

34 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

[ TRAVEL ] a concierge at the hotel and they can arrange transportation and reservations.

Ambassadors of the Environment — The Ritz-Carlton offers a neat program called The Ambassadors of the Environment, which educates guests on Hawaiian culture and guides them through the many natural wonders of the land. Some of the many activities offered include Snorkeling for Beginners, Coastal Hike & Tide Pool Explorations, and Whale Watching. We highly recommend their ‘Cities Under the Sea’ Snorkeling excursion. Led my an amazingly informative and engaging naturalist, you will explore the living communities of fish, coral and algae on this interpretive and exciting snorkel. Capture images with underwater digital cameras and create memories to last a lifetime.

Shopping — The resort is situated near the charming, renowned town of Lahaina. Guests can arrange transportation or rent a car to explore the town, which is rich with wonderful shopping stores and authentic and creative restaurants and snacks. Be sure to carve out half

Castile Room Company get-togethers or social celebrations Two patios, stunning bar, private dining area Lunch, dinner or cocktail party options Wine Spectator wine list and craft cocktails Top 10 certified sustainable restaurant in US

a day or more to explore the historic town.

Sunset Sail — This excursion is a must-do for couples and friends, and includes a memorable sunset cruise on a regal catamaran, including appetizers and open bar.

Ulalena —The ultimate “date night” excursion, “Ulalena” is a spectacular dance theatre performance, showcasing the history of Hawaii through the Hawaiian hula. It differs from a Luau, and doesn’t serve food, so you’ll have the opportunity to try one of the many dining destinations in Lahaina afterward.

CALL OUR EVENT CONCIERGE NOW The Ritz Carleton Kapalua

+1.925.338.0531 | events@sabiopleasanton.com

1 Ritz-Carlton Drive Kapalua, HI 808.669.6200 www.ritzcarlton.com/en/hotels/kapalua-maui

Modern Tapas | Wine Bar | Craft Cocktails

501 Main Street, Pleasanton 925.800.3090 | sabiopleasanton.com

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 35

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

TisSANTA the Season…

SIGHTINGS & TREE LIGHTINGS DECEMBER 1– 23 Visit & Photos with Santa Main Street Plaza Downtown Martinez Various hours www.martinezsanta.com/new-page-1

Santa Photos & Offers Broadway Plaza Walnut Creek Various hours www.broadwayplaza.com/Events/ Details/454535

DECEMBER 1 – 24

DECEMBER 2 - 3

Photos with Santa Santa’s Villa Blackhawk Plaza Danville Mon-Sat, 11:00 am-7:00 pm Sun 11:00 am-6:00 pm www.shopblackhawkplaza.com

Holidays in the Vineyards Multiple Wineries throughout Livermore Note: Santa will only be there Saturday 12:00pm – 4:30pm www.lvwine.org

DECEMBER 2 Christmas Tree Lighting City Hall Oakley 4pm – 7pm www.ci.oakley.ca.us Home for the Holidays First St and Livermore Ave Livermore 11:00am – 4:00pm www.livermoredowntown.com Alameda Mayor’s Holiday Tree Lighting Ceremony City Hall 2263 Santa Clara Ave Alameda 4:30pm – 6:15pm www.alamedaca.gov

Santa’s Flight Academy Sunvalley Shopping Center Concord Various hours www.shopsunvalley.com/holidays Santa’s Waiting Stoneridge Mall Pleasanton Various hours www.simon.com/santa SANTA HAS A MAILBOX AT THE DANVILLE COMMUNITY CENTER!

Bring your letters to Santa, November 30th to December 11th, and you will receive a letter in return by December 24!

Be sure to include your name and mailing address.

22nd Annual Holiday Sights & Sounds Parade & Tree Lighting Downtown Livermore Livermore 6:00pm www.livermoredowntown.com

DECEMBER 3 – 17 (WEEKENDS ONLY) DECEMBER 22 -31 (DAILY) Holiday in the Park Six Flags Discovery Kingdom 1001 Fairgrounds Dr., Vallejo Various hours www.sixflags.com/discoverykingdom

DECEMBER 9 Breakfast with Santa Abert H. DeWitt O’Club Alameda 10:00am – 12:00pm www.alamedaca.gov Breakfast with Santa Shannon Community Center Dublin Must purchase tickets!

Three seating’s available: 8:30am, 9:45am or 11:00am 925.556.4500 www.ci.dublin.ca.us Breakfast with Santa Oakley Recreation Building 1250 O’Hara Ave Registration required 10am – 12pm www.ci.oakley.ca.us

DECEMBER 15 Visit with Santa & Mrs. Claus 1815 Fourth Street The Berkeley Pole Berkeley 12pm – 4pm www.fourthstreet.com/ events/2017/11/4/holidays-on-fourthstreet

DECEMBER 15- 23

Tots Winter Carnival Live Oak Park Berkeley 10:00am – 12:30pm www.ci.berkeley.ca.us

Fairy Winterland Children’s Fairyland Oakland 12pm – 7pm www.fairyland.org

DECEMBER 2 - 24

DECEMBER 16 – JAN 6

Santa’s Arrival Danville Livery Every Saturday and Sunday 12:00pm– 3:00pm www.danvillelivery.com

36 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

Holidays on the Farm!

Dell’Osso Family Farm Lathrop 209.982.0833 www.holidaysonthefarm.com

3:32 PM

FIFTH NIGHT FREE OFFER SAY ALOHA TO AN EXTRA NIGHT

Enjoy your 5th night free in a spacious one-bedroom suite or luxury beach villa

SUITES FROM $559* PACKAGE INCLUDES • Accommodation in a spacious one-bedroom suite or luxury villa for a minimum of 5 nights • Stays through December 20, 2018 • Fifth consecutive night is free *Fifth Night Free rates from $559 USD per night based on two adults and two children in a Fairmont Suite, excluding applicable taxes and resort charge. Villas from $2,119 USD. The fifth night will be adjusted at time of check out. Blackout dates may apply. This offer may not be combined with any other special offers, promotions or packages.

For reservations contact Fairmont Kea Lani Reservations Team at 1 866 540 4456.

[ PARENTING ]

Ask a UCSF Benioff Children’s Hospital Expert

by Dr. Alison Matsunaga, Department of Hematology-Oncology How do you get lead poisoning?

Since toddlers often put things in their mouths, they are at an increased risk to ingest lead if it is present in their environment. If any individual is exhibiting “pica behavior,” which is eating non-food items that might contain lead, they are also at risk for high levels of lead in their blood.

How can you prevent a child from getting it?

Talk with your pediatrician if your child is at risk for elevated blood levels. A blood test will determine if your child has a high lead level in the blood and can be performed at any time.

The test is often done when your child reaches one year old and can also be obtained in these situations: • Your child is exhibiting pica behavior – i.e., eating non-food items, especially dirt.

• You and your child are residing in a home built before 1978, after which lead was removed from household paint. This should especially be checked if you see paint chips or dust, and/or there have been recent home renovations.

• A parent works in an environment at risk for lead exposure.

• You have toys or toy jewelry on the lead recall list (www.cpsc.gov).

• There is exposure to medicinal herbal remedies or ceremonial makeup that might contain lead.

How do you treat lead poisoning?

The first approach to treating lead poisoning is to identify the lead source to stop the exposure. Subsequent chelation therapy is dependent on how high the lead level is, and how acute and sudden the exposure is. Children with higher lead levels can often have concurrent iron deficiency, which also needs to be treated. If your child has been found to have a high lead level, your pediatrician will contact your local county health department’s Lead Poisoning Prevention Program for assistance in investigating the source of the lead exposure, to ensure that your house is safe for your child. Your pediatrician and the health department will also contact our hematology center should there be further management issues.

What are the effects of long-term lead poisoning?

When children present with very high, toxic levels of lead in the blood, this can lead to acutely severe symptoms such as coma or seizures. Even chronically low levels of lead in the blood can affect your child’s IQ, attention span and academic performance. Previously, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention’s definition of a high lead level was above 10 to 20 micrograms per deciliter, but now even a level of 5 micrograms per deciliter warrants further investigation and follow-up.

Call the Poison Control Center If your child swallowed it, breathed it in, or spilled it on his/her skin – Call the Poison Control Line at (800) 222-1222.

38 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017

®

Preschool

Education is a Lifelong Commitment

®

Discover Quarry Lane

NOW ENROLLING Join our Open House every Wednesday! www.QuarryLane.org/Preschool

Toddler, Preschool and Pre-Kindergarten Academic-Based Curriculum Passionate, Experienced Educators

PLEASANTON WEST CAMPUS Preschool and Pre-Kindergarten 4444B Black Ave., Pleasanton, CA

925.462.6300

Full and Half Day Schedules Computer, Spanish, Music, P.E., and Library Two Preschool Campuses in Pleasanton

PLEASANTON EAST CAMPUS Infant through Pre-Kindergarten 3750 Boulder St., Pleasanton, CA

925.846.9400

DECEMBER 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 39 CA Licenses: 013411303, 013411304, 013411305, 013417681

40 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | DECEMBER 2017