Active Family Magazine - April 2017

APRIL 2017

EGG-CITING

21 WAYS

To Get Closer To Your Child Today

Bunny Sightings & Easter Egg Hunts!

SPRING BREAK

WITH KIDS IS A MINDSET

[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]

PUB: Active Fam Magazine Issue: April 201 Client: Aston Property: AKS Size: 1/2 ph non (7.75” x 8.125”) Colors: Full DUE: 3/15

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Your friendly neighborhood charter school is offering education for ALL of the tri valley Please join us for an exciting Open House with special guests.

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OPEN ENROLLMENT 2017 Offering private school environment at a public school.

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2 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

Volume 4 / Issue 39

EGG-citing Bunny Sightings & Easter Egg Hunts!

[ PARENTING ]

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ]

5 Reasons to Halt the Kid “Trophy Epidemic”

5 Tips For Finding Peace When The SH#% Hits The Fan!

8

24

21 Ways To Get Closer To Your Child Today

[ MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIPS ] Summer Camp Guide

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Know Your Tendencies and Try Something New – Family

10 So You’ve Tried to Stop Yelling...

But Have You Tried This?

17

28

20

32

10 Benefits Of Camp that You Don’t Get at School

38

[ EVENTS ] April Calendar

Transitioning to Middle School

26

22

Camp Spotlight

42

[SEASONAL FUN ] Squaw Valley For All Seasons

13

Spring Break with Kids Is a Mindset

30

13 4 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

22

24

GREAT EXPO AWAITS YOU Enjoy the Family Fitness Expo at the finish line to help you celebrate and recover from a successful run.

We will have lots of goodies, giveaways and activities to inspire your children to engage in a healthy lifestyle.

NOT A RUNNER OR A MORNING PERSON? That’s ok! You can make an online Snooze for Schools donation and sleep tight knowing your contribution will keep us on the right course. Every dollar is greatly appreciated! Visit www.ppierun.com to provide support.

Local Life & Style for the East Bay Area Publisher/Editor

Marketing Assistant Interns

Contributing Authors

Tracie Brown Vollgraf

Jaida Sinclair

Advertising Sales Director

Fashion Editor

Kathy Brillheart kbrillheart@activefamilymag.com

Rachel Fawkes www.fawkeshunter.com

Advertising Sales Managers

Design/Production

Mary Oakes moakes@activefamilymag.com

Teresa Agnew Craft

Dr. Michele Borba Rachel Macy Stafford Dr. Laura Markham Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. Karin Volo Carrie Contey Jennifer S. White Elizabeth Kang Ann Woods, Roughing It Day Camp

Active Family is published by TAG Marketing Group Mailing Address | P.O. Box 5158, Pleasanton, CA 94566

Advertising Inquiries | 925.789.0709 Email Address | info@activefamilymag.com

Editor’s Note With April upon us, time will seemingly start moving rather quickly as the countdown to the end of the school year looms in front of us. Any thoughts on how to keep the kids engaged, occupied, stimulated and off their devices for the better part of summer? Planning a summer vacay? We can help!

With a team of experienced counselors, Summer Camp is a great childcare option. If it is a specialized week-long summer camp you are looking for, or perhaps an all-day traditional camp program, turn to our Summer Camp section starting on page 32. There are an abundance of camps offered in the Bay Area which are sure to meet your (and your child’s) requirements.

If it’s a family bonding vacation you seek, be sure to check out the Squaw Valley travel feature on page 23. Squaw Valley is the quintessential place to spend time with your brood, whether you are still looking for some snow (get up there now!), or would like to explore the great outdoors under the sun, Squaw offers all types of activities, day and night!

We can’t forget about the Easter Bunny! Find Bunny Sightings and Easter Egg Hunts around the Bay on page 26!

Enjoy the sunshine!

Tracie Brown Vollgraf Editor info@activefamilymag.com

6 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ ACTIVE FAMILY ]

IN THE MONTESSORI TRADITION

The Concordia School A warm, welcoming community since 1973 Hands-on learning for children ages 2 years through 6th grade Home-like, multi-age classroom Art, science, music, and Spanish integrated into daily life Quality before & after school care Full member of the American Montessori Society

School Tours Scheduled Weekly Call Today 925-689-6910

2353 FIFTH AVENUE ● CONCORD ● WWW.CONCORDIASCHOOL.COM

Dr. Ozzie Jafarnia

DDS, Board Certified

Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry

Dr. Noyan Aynechi DDS, Board Certified

Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry

Nothing is more beautiful than your child’s smile!

Welcome to Danville Pediatric Dentistry and Orthodontics! ! Our office is committed to providing excellent preventative care for children in a warm, positive, and compassionate environment.

We specialize in comprehensive dental care for children of all ages with an emphasis on prevention and health. As your child grows, we are able to provide comprehensive orthodontic care for children and teens. This is to help create and maintain a healthy smile into adulthood. We will do so by providing excellent treatment at the right time for the right reason with integrity, honesty and a caring heart.

Your child’s smile is our top priority.

We are committed to making it the happiest, healthiest and straightest smile possible. After all, nothing is more beautiful than your child's smile!

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[ PARENTING ] Dr. Michele Borba is an internationally recognized expert and author on children, teens, parenting, bullying and moral development. She is an NBC contributor appearing over 100 times on the TODAY show and is the regular parenting expert on Dr. Drew’s Lifechangers. Her work has been featured on Dr. Phil, Dateline, The View, The Doctors, Fox News, The Early Show and CNN and well as in Newsweek, People, Good Housekeeping, Chicago Tribune, U.S. News & World Report, Washington Post, The New York Times and The Globe and Mail.

She was an MSNBC contributor to two televised “Education Nation” specials. Dr. Borba is the awardwinning author of 22 parenting and educational books translated into 14 languages. Titles include: Don’t Give Me That Attitude!, Parents Do Make A Difference, The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenges and Wildest Worries, and Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me!, No More Misbehavin’, Building Moral Intelligence (cited

by Publishers’ Weekly as “Among the most noteworthy of 2001”), and Esteem Builders used by 1.5 million students worldwide. She writes as the parenting expert for Dr. Oz’s website, as well a daily column for her blog, Dr. Borba’s Reality Check: www.micheleborba.com Twitter: @micheleborba

5 Reasons to Halt the Kid “Trophy Epidemic”

by Dr. Michele Borba Just pretend: The sports season just ended and you and the other parents are bursting with pride watching each child receive a participation trophy with their teammates. Of course, we hate to see our children disappointed, so when we notice every kid holding a golden statue, we utter a collective parent sigh: “Oh, good, they all feel special!” Phew!

But do our good intentions really help our kids? Not if we really want to nurture our children’s character and base our parenting on solid child-development research.

The “Every Kid Gets a Prize” is a staple of modern-day parenting. Even coaches and the sports industry are jumping on board. The local chapter of one national sports association spends roughly 12 percent of its yearly budget on trophies just to make sure that every kid feels special—even if it’s just for “showing up.”

But beware: our good-hearted trend may actually backfire and diminishnot nurture-our children’s self-esteem, character and resilience. Here are six

8 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ PARENTING ] reasons to stop the “Every kid gets a trophy” trend, and

are exposed to setbacks in small doses.That way when

pronto.

those bigger challenges come along they realize they can handle them.

Curtails Character Development Our children develop crucial character traits like

Giving every kid a trophy as a means to cushion

perseverance, dependability, and trustworthiness by

disappointment from not “being the best,” only reduces

rolling up their sleeves, practicing hard, and giving

their chances to realize that they can bounce back and

tasks their personal best. Awarding kids for putting on a

curtails their capacity for resilience.

uniform is honoring mediocrity-not excellence-and it robs them of the opportunity to strengthen their character.

Devalues Real Success

Character is what helps our children become good

I’ll never forget when my college-bound son handed

people and handle life.

me a box of his trophies culled from being on dozens of teams. “They don’t mean anything,” he explained,

Short-Changes Real-Life Preparation

“everyone has the same trophies.” He saved just one

Life is tough. Success is hard work. So truth be told: the

medal from a team History Day competition that was

real world doesn’t give out ribbons, medals, awards and

well-earned from hard work and passion.

trophies just for participating. Ask yourself: “If my child thinks that all she has to do is show up to earn the prize,

If every kid gets the trophy, then their “real win” isn’t

what message does she learn?”

special and they fail to reap the joy that comes from realizing that their hard efforts actually paid off.

Let’s not allow our kids to believe that they can take the easy way out, cut corners, and rely on others to do the

It’s natural for parents to want to help their kids feel

heavy hitting. Doing so won’t prepare them for the real

good, but what we may be missing is helping them

world.

care about others and support their teammates. The real world isn’t about “Me” but “We.” In today’s diverse,

Robs “Authentic” Self-Esteem

global world our children must learn to collaborate and

In all fairness, a big reason many parents joined the

support each other. And we must switch our kids’ from

“Trophy Bandwagon” is because they assumed that it

thinking, “I, me, mine,” to “we, us ours.” One way to do

would nurture their children’s self-esteem. But research

so is by encouraging them to recognize the strengths of

tells a different story.

others, and to congratulate their teammates for their talents. To prepare them for today’s world, we must help

Authentic self-esteem is comprised of two parts: A

our kids think “WE,” not “ME.”

Feeling of Worthiness (“I am a worthwhile person”) and A Feeling of Competence (“I am capable to handle life.”)

Let’s stop this craze of giving every kid a trophy just for showing up and breathing. The practice is not beneficial

While that trophy may make a kid feel “special” in the

to children’s character development. Instead, tell your

moment, it doesn’t endure. Real self-esteem is gained

son or daughter that you are proud that they were a

from praise, pats on the back or trophies that are

team player and that you loved going to those games or

earned, and kids are quick to recognize they did nothing

event.

to warrant the award.

Do snap that photo of your child, but make sure your Curtails Resilience

son or daughter is in a group shot with all his or her

Helping kids cope with adversity must be part of our

teammates. Now there is the memory that both you and

parenting agendas. After all, life has bumps and our

your child will want to preserve! And it’s also one of the

children must learn coping skills to ride them out.

best ways to raise a generation of kids who think “WE,”

Children become more tolerant to frustration when they

not “ME.” APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 9

[ PARENTING ]

21 Ways To Get Closer To Your Child Today

by Dr. Laura Markham “I watch their softly tousled heads slumbering on their pillows, and sadness wells up in me. Have I drunk in their smiles and laughter and hugged them, or have I just checked things off my to-do list today? They’re growing so quickly.

Dr. Laura Markham is the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting. She earned her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology from Columbia University and has worked as a parenting coach with countless parents across the English-speaking world, both in person and via phone.

You can find Dr. Laura online at AhaParenting.com, the website of Aha! Moments for parents of kids from birth through the teen years, where she offers a free daily inspiration email to parents.

10 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

One morning I may wake up and one of my girls will be getting married, and I’ll worry: Have I played with them enough? Have I enjoyed the opportunity to be a part of their lives?” —Janet Fackrell It’s part of our job description as parents to guide our kids and keep them moving through the daily routine. All too often, that means setting limits, denying requests, correcting behavior.

Sometimes we’re able to be emotionally generous, so our child doesn’t perceive our guidance as “negative.” More often, kids give us the benefit of the doubt because all the other loving, affirming interactions create a positive balance in our relationship account. That’s why creating those positive

[ PARENTING ] interactions with your child matters so much.

Research shows that we need at least five positive interactions to each negative interaction to maintain a healthy, happy relationship that can weather the normal conflicts and upsets of daily life.

So when we’re short on positive interactions, our relationship balance dips into the red. As with any bank account, we’re overdrawn. That’s when kids resist our guidance and develop attitude, whether they’re two or twelve.

Life is busy, and you don’t need one more thing for your to-do list. Instead, why not create a few daily habits that replenish your relationship account with your child? After thirty days, any action becomes a habit, so you don’t have to think about it.

Here are 21 things you can start doing today to build a closer relationship with your child.

1. Snuggle with each child for five minutes when they first wake up.

2. Take an extra minute to sit down with your kids at breakfast, asking what each one is looking forward to today.

3. Instead of yelling at him to keep him moving through the morning routine, empower him with a chart with photos of him doing each task, and let him be “in charge” of himself while you just smile and point to the chart, asking what he needs to do next.

4. Write a love note to slip into her lunch box.

8. Turn off your phone and music when your child gets in the car with you at the end of the day, and listen to her most and least favorite parts of the day.

9. When your children get into a fight, keep your sense of humor, listen to both kids without taking sides, and help them work out a win/win solution.

10. When he has a meltdown because you cut his sandwich wrong, don’t make a new sandwich, but remind yourself that tantrums signal distress, not defiance. Stay close and compassionate so he feels safe enough to cry and empty all those upsets out of his emotional backpack. You’ll all have a much better evening.

11. Commiserate and encourage as you help her study for her spelling test.

12. Laugh at his jokes.

13. No matter what your child says, empathize. Actions may need to be limited, but all emotions are acceptable. When you acknowledge how your child feels, you strengthen your connection and build emotional intelligence.

14. Spend fifteen minutes of special time with each child, just following her lead and pouring your love into her.

This habit alone can transform your relationship with your child. When she wants to use the couch cushions to build a fort, say yes. Let her be the director and tell you what to do.

15. At dinner, ask an interesting question and give each child time to answer while everyone listens. (See box below for inspiration).

5. Skip together as you walk to the school bus, or sing happy songs in the car.

16. Have a pillow fight before bath time.

6. As you hug her goodbye, tell her you can’t wait to see her this afternoon and hear all about her day.

Remember to say “Have fun!” instead of “Be good!”

17. Empathize and keep your sense of humor when he doesn’t want to stop playing and get ready for bed, even while you insist.

7. During the day, find five minutes here and there to simply close your eyes and get centered. Try to get organized before you leave the office, so you can really leave your work behind and turn off your phone.

In the evening, you’ll be able to give your family the best of you, not what’s left of you.

18. Listen compassionately to her long story about troubles with girls in her class, without getting overexcited or jumping in to fix anything.

19. Notice that you’re getting frustrated about getting him to bed, and calm yourself down. Then, reconnect APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 11

[ PARENTING ] with him and use that warm connection to get him tucked in.

20. Enjoy reading the bedtime story. Savor the smell of your child’s hair and the warmth of her body. Send her off to sleep with a sense that all is right in her world.

21. Lie with each child for a few minutes in the dark, just snuggling companionably and telling him that you feel so lucky to be his parent.

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Time-consuming? Sure. You can’t do everything every day with each child. But most of these practices don’t add much time to your day; they just make it go more smoothly.

And when you create habits like these, kids cooperate more, fight less, and WANT to follow your guidance. You strengthen and sweeten your relationship, every single day. So when you get to the teen years, your child will be open to your influence and might even ask your advice.

And that’s better than money in the bank.

• • • • •

What traits do you most admire in other people?

Did you help anyone today?

Did you have a chance to be kind to anyone today?

Is it hard to make the choice to be kind sometimes?

Do you think it’s okay to lie about your age to get into an Amusement Park with a cheaper ticket? Is it ever ok to lie?

• Do you think your parents ever lie?

• How do you think your friends’ families compare to ours?

Are they about as close? Closer? More distant? Why do you think that?

• Do you think your friends talk to their parents?

• What do you think makes a family close?

• On a scale of 1 to 10, how strict are the parents in this family? What is the ideal number?

• Is the discipline in our family fair?

• What’s the best thing about our family?

• If you could change one thing about your parents, what would it be?

• If you could have a conversation with anyone in history, who would it be?

• What would you want to ask them?

• What is your earliest memory?

• What are you most proud of?

• If you could change one thing about your appearance, what would it be?

• If you had to choose only three words to describe yourself, what would you say?

• Is there anything about you that inspires other people in any way?

12 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

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• Climb a 9 foot kapok tree • Explore a gorilla nest • Discover products that come from tropical rainforests • Study animals and plants using unique scientific tools • Learn how children and their families help protect rainforests

Rainforest Adventure was created by Stepping Stones Museum for Children

Special Exhibition Open Through May 7

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

SQUAW VALLEY

FOR ALL SEASONS

by Elizabeth Kang

A definitive guide to enjoying Squaw Valley Alpine Meadows all year long!

Squaw Valley Alpine Meadows — The name conjures images of pristine, snowy white ski slopes and families cozied up fireside, sipping hot chocolate. But contrary to what you may think you know about this expansive Lake Tahoe resort, there is much more for families, couples and friends to do than wintertime skiing and snowboarding.

Located in Olympic Valley, nestled between Truckee and Lake Tahoe, this renowned resort is a haven for thrill seekers and laidback types alike. With endless activities and boundless beauty, any season is the right season to visit Squaw Valley/Alpine Meadows.

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 13

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

WINTER/SPRING

SNOW ACTIVITIES

Voted USA Today’s reader’s choice best ski resort in

For those seeking alternative winter thrills, both resorts

North America, Squaw Valley and Alpine Meadows are

offer snow tubing, ($34 for adults and children at least

actually two separate ski destinations, each with their

40” tall,) and Cross-Country/Nordic Skiing. Squaw Valley

own character and vibe. While both offer a vibrant ski

also offers snowmobiling, and even mini snowmobiling

culture and picturesque views, some prefer the smaller,

for kids ages 6-12 yrs-old, (also $34.) Other snow activities

more intimate family friendly vibe of Alpine Meadows,

offered at Squaw include snowshoeing, sledding, and

while others enjoy the grander scale of Squaw Valley.

hour-long dog sled rides led by gorgeous Alaskan

Squaw Valley and Alpine Meadows are both only a 5-10

Huskies. Kids will enjoy making s’mores in the numerous

minute drive to the lake and offer awesome skiing and

campfires available throughout the village, and if you

snowboarding for all levels.

happen to forget the marshmallows, s’mores kits are available for purchase at Dorinda’s Chocolates in The

You can’t go wrong with either choice. Both offer ski

Village at Squaw Valley.

and snowboarding lessons for ages 3-yrs-old to adult, restaurants, shopping and more.

RELAX & INDULGE If relaxation and indulgence is included in your Winter

SKI/SNOWBOARDING

vacation itinerary, Squaw Valley/Alpine Meadows has

Ski and snowboard lessons

you covered. Treat yourself at The Trilogy Spa at Squaw

are offered for kids ages

Valley with a “Winter’s Bliss Massage,” ($120-$165) or

3 and up, starting at $149

indulge in a “Peppermint Pedicure” ($68) or soothing

for half day, with full day

facial ($115.) After a day of spring skiing, ease aching

lessons starting at $184. It’s

muscles in the High Camp Hot Tub, open spring through

never too late to learn —

September.

adult lessons start at $179.

Private lessons are also available for all ages. For those on a budget, it’s a good idea to book lessons early (prior to 48 hours before the lesson) to save $20. Season passes are also a great way to save money on lift tickets if you plan on visiting multiple times. Look into a “Tahoe Super 4 Pack” for savings on four unrestricted lift tickets at Squaw Valley and/or Alpine Meadows.

14 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

FAMILY FRIENDLY EATS When it comes to dining out in the area, adults don’t have to sacrifice taste and quality to appease their little ones. Fireside Pizza Co. is a hopping venue offering gourmet pizza (gluten free crusts available) that both kids and adults enjoy. A great pick for lunch is Soupa, offering sandwiches, soup and salad in a casual atmosphere. For a delicious, hearty breakfast, head to the popular Wildfour Baking Company for yummy staples such as scrambles and baked goods the kids will love.

FINE DINING Believe it or not, true fine dining can be found in the area for those who want to enjoy a more upscale culinary experience. In nearby Truckee, order the chef’s tasting menu at Trokay for a luxurious modern-european finedining experience. The highly rated restaurant boasts Michelin star chefs and thoughtful, seasonal menus.

Also to be found in Truckee is Stellla, a charming farmto-table style eatery that bakes its own bread in-house and creates beautifully presented dishes with many local ingredients. Another white tablecloth option right in Olympic Valley is Graham’s at Squaw Valley, a cozy

WinterWonderGrass festival, a three-day Bluegrass/ Acoustic Roots music series that’s great fun for the family, (March 30-April 2nd.)

SUMMER/FALL All ages and skill levels will find plenty of fun to be had during the Summer/Fall season at Squaw Valley/Alpine Meadows.

steakhouse with unique game options and fresh seafood

SUMMER MUSIC

choices — think elk chops and seared scallops.

Summertime in Squaw is also a great time for music lovers. From June 13th through September 5th, blues

WINTER CONCERTS

lovers will not want to miss “Bluesdays,” a free outdoor

Squaw Valley is host to a number of concert series

concert series featuring popular, acclaimed blues

and free music shows year-round. Many, however,

musicians. On Bluesdays, which occur every Tuesday

make a special visit during springtime to catch the

during the season, guests can enjoy special discounted APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 15

[ SEASONAL FUN ]

rates on lodging, enjoy samples of food and beverages

September, from 9am-3pm. Qualified and responsible

at the concert, and take advantage of discounted Aerial

camp counselors lead children (divided into appropriate

Tram rides.

age groups) on adventures such as hiking, swimming, crafting, biking, scavenger hunts, cooking classes and

SITE-SEEING/HIKING

more. Parents can relax and have fun knowing their

Kids and adults alike will love riding the year-round Aerial

children are being entertained in a safe environment.

Tram to experience epic scenery and views. Ride the

Purchase camp passes in advance to save $20, for $109

tram to High Camp to choose from a number of scenic

per child, per day.

hikes and child-friendly walking trails. Colorful wildflowers and breathtaking waterfalls will reward hikers, who can

ADULT TIME

choose from easy, moderate, or difficult trails.

While the kids are away, adults will want to play. Enjoy a relaxing spa day at Trilogy Spa, or a meditative yoga

SUMMER ACTIVITIES

class at Wanderlust Yoga Studio. Take a long, leisurely

More family friendly activities include outdoor roller

break at Uncorked Wine Bar and Shop, where wine

skating, bike rentals, disc golf, mini golf and swimming

enthusiasts can enjoy boutique wines, live music and

in the High Camp pool. Daredevils can test their

gourmet cheese in a cozy atmosphere. Enjoy some

climbing skills on the indoor climbing wall, or practice a

leisurely shopping at The Village, where shoppers

backwards somersault on the outdoor Skyjump (20-220

can browse boutique shops for on-trend clothing,

lbs.)

sporting equipment, charming souvenirs and gourmet chocolates.

OLYMPIC MUSEUM Families will want to take a break from all of the

With so many activities for all ages, every season, Squaw

adventure to check out the Squaw Valley Olympic

Valley/Alpine Meadows is truly a year-round playground.

Museum. Learn all about the 1960 Winter Olympics that took place right in Squaw Valley. The museum is chock full of fun memorabilia like authentic team uniforms, news articles, and genuine equipment used by famous athletes of the time.

KIDS DAY CAMP A wonderful option to keep kids safe and occupied all day is the Squaw Kids Adventure Camp, offered on Fridays, Saturdays, Sundays and Mondays, June through 16 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

For more information, go to www.squawalpine.com.

[ PARENTING ]

So You’ve Tried to Stop Yelling…

But Have You Tried This?

by Rachel Macy Stafford Rachel Macy Stafford is a certified special education teacher with a Master’s Degree in education and ten years of experience working with parents and children. In December 2010, this life-long writer felt compelled to share her journey to let go of distraction and grasp what really matters by creating the blog “Hands Free Mama.” Using her skills as a writer, teacher, and encourager, Rachel provides readers with simple, non-intimidating, and motivating methods to let go of distraction and connect with their loved ones. Rachel’s work has been featured on CNN, Good Morning America, Global News, USA Today, TIME.com, MSN.com, The Huffington Post, and Reader’s Digest. Her blog currently averages one million visitors a month. Rachel’s new book, HANDS FREE MAMA, is a New York Times Bestseller.

“Once I knew the depth of where no hope was and darkness lay on the face of things.

Then love came and set my soul free.” – Helen Keller Forever engrained in my mind will be a scream so maniacal, so ear-piercing, so desperate that my older daughter ran and put her arms around her baby sister. They were afraid … but no more afraid than I was of myself. Yelling was my cry for help … my distress flare sent into the sky … my lowest point of desperation. That scream, the one that actually hurt my throat, is one of my greatest regrets and one of my greatest blessings.

Although I did not know how I was going to stop yelling, I was certain I didn’t want my children to grow up afraid. I wanted to be remembered for my smile, not my scowl. I wanted my children to wear love like armor, not scars from sharply delivered words. I wanted to be a safe haven, not someone to avoid. I wanted my children’s inner voice to sound like grace, not inadequacy.

Fast-forward six years to today. I am no longer a yeller. Yes, I get sad, frustrated, angry, hopeless, and insecure, but there is a profound difference in what I do once I get there: I don’t stay there. My ability to come back to love, patience, grace, and positivity did not happen overnight. Maintaining a sense of calm in challenging situations took years of work and painful introspection which I catalog in my first book. But for today’s purposes, I’m going to start APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 17

[ PARENTING ] small. I want to help someone right now with actionable steps. This small-step approach to change is the whole premise of my new book, ONLY LOVE TODAY. Unlike most books, a powerful takeaway can be gained through a two-minute reading from any point in the book. When taken to heart, the words have the potential to inspire lasting change in your heart and home.

“I’m having a hard time right now.” When they heard that phrase, they knew I either needed space or to do what I was asking them to do. Talking about my outbursts before they happened provided my family with a “heads up” to be gentle with me when I was on the edge.

The beauty of the seven suggestions below is they will improve any relationship, not just parent/child. Above all, these suggestions provide what I believe is most critical to ending yelling in your home once and for all: HOPE – hope for who you already are and hope for who you can become.

I’m making an effort to use a kinder tone of voice. I may need your gentle reminders.

Find your truest voice Your truest voice speaks fears. It speaks truths. It speaks hopes. It speaks desires. It speaks dreams. It speaks hurts.

Unlike the voice that barks empty threats and sweeping generalizations, your truest voice can be heard. Unlike the voice that spews sarcasm, accusations, and defensiveness, your truest voice feels like peace when it is spoken. Unlike the voice that hurls insults and patronizing words, your truest voice won’t drive you away from the people you love.

I’m making an effort to use a peaceful response in times of stress and overwhelm. Would you put your hand on your heart when I am hurting you with my words or tone as a reminder of my promise?

I found my truest voice by writing down my thoughts in tiny notebooks. Over the past several years, I’ve released trapped emotions, let go of suppressed memories, and liberated shameful thoughts in my pocket-size notebooks that I carry with me at all times. Through these pages, my angriest voice got weaker and my truest voice got stronger. Through the notebooks, I was able to put feelings into words. I was able to gain clarity. I felt heard by something far greater than myself, and that gave me comfort.

Whether it’s through a notebook, an easel, or the lens of a camera … whether it’s through dancing, singing, cooking, or meditating on a rubber mat … whether it’s through running, coloring, or coin collecting, finding your truest voice and listening to what it uncovers will bring healing.

Go public with your intention Making a public declaration of my goal was instrumental to breaking my yelling pattern. I informed my daughters what I was trying to work on. I let them know that when I felt like I was losing control, I would say these words: 18 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

Other public declarations might sound like this:

I’m making an effort to let you do more things on your own without my comments, judgment, or criticism. When you say, “I got it, Mom,” I will step back.

Post your declaration and read it often. I keep this one by my bedside to recite each morning before I get out of bed: “Today I will choose love. If I mistakenly choose distraction, perfection, or negativity over love, I will not wallow in regret. I will choose love next.” RMS, Only Love Today Look directly at your loved one before responding In moments of frustration, challenge, and overwhelm, I make sure I am looking directly into the faces of my loved ones before I respond. In that critical pause, I see people who count on me to care for them, love them, and guide them. I see people who are learning how to live by watching me live. I see people who will use similar responses when they are having a hard time. Taking a three-second pause to look at them, really look at them, enables me to model a response I would be proud to see them use in stressful times. Really seeing them helps me come back to a place where my voice can be heard instead of hurtful.

Stop self-sabotage with a sticky note Once you get into the habit of being hard on yourself and focusing on your mistakes, it’s difficult to stop.

But breaking a yelling pattern is not going to come from a place of shame and condemnation. Positive change is going to come from a place of grace and

[ PARENTING ] encouragement. To help me when I get into a pattern of harsh self-judgment, I put a sticky note in my pocket.

Each time I do something kind, helpful, loving, or patient, I make a hash mark on the note. At the end of the day, I look at my hash marks – whether it’s two or twenty-two – I celebrate the times I chose love over the alternatives.

Recording every positive action with a mark makes this an active process. We are then more apt to notice our goodness, which shifts it away from the failings. By focusing on our positives, it has the tendency to carry over to others.

completed before screens can be enjoyed.) Utilizing lists

See What is Good in Others Another way to stop the yelling pattern is to challenge yourself to voice any and all positives about your loved ones—what they say, what they do, and who they are.

See flowers not weeds.

Examples: “I appreciate the kind way you responded just then.”

“I love the way you dug into that meal I made! Thank you for that!”

“You treated your sister so lovingly. Did you see the way she looked at you?”

“I love spending time with you. You come up with the best ideas.”

Human beings, no matter age, respond to praise and affirmation. They will want to do more actions that make you proud. Be sure and notice the joy in his or her face and grab it. Hold on to it. Let it give you hope that you are making progress and creating a positive home environment. *Important note – If there is an issue or problem you need to mention, make it a statement with no judgment. I use Sandy Blackard’s positive approach of Saying What You See: “Your clean clothes are on the floor,” instead of, “Pick those up.” This way, my child is the one who comes up with the solution. Sandy writes, “By listening and letting children solve their own problems, they learn how to get along without your intervention, which you can then point out as a strength.” Through Sandy, I’ve learned the power in leaving out all suggestions unless I know my suggestions will feel like help to my child. My daughters know what is expected of them (they have a list they mark off each morning and each evening that must be

alleviates nagging that turns into yelling.

Post and recite mantras until they become go-to phrases Plastered throughout my house (on kitchen cabinets, bathroom mirror, closet door, and the daily calendar) were pressure-reducing mantras. When I saw them, I recited them. Like stop signs, they helped me slow down to love and be loved: Mistakes mean we’re learning.

Come as you are.

It’s good enough for today.

You are doing the best you can.

Today matters more than yesterday.

Only love today.

Give yourself grace Sometimes by eight o’clock a.m., I can already name a few things I wished I’d done differently. But instead of beating myself up over them, I remind myself of this: My humanness allows my loved ones to be human. My courage to get up after I stumble gives my loved ones the courage to get up after they stumble. Loving myself despite my failures, flaws, and imperfections gives the people in my life permission to love themselves “as is.”

Love doesn’t have to be perfect (or anywhere near it) to be felt, absorbed, and transformative.

You can feel like you’re failing and still BE LOVE. You can feel like you’re in the dark and still be someone’s light.

You can feel like you’re going under and still lift someone up.

Love prevails over failures, flaws, and imperfect days.

That’s what I believe. That’s what I live. And that brings me hope.

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 19

[ PARENTING ] Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. is a psychoanalyst with specialized clinical training in infant-parent, child, adolescent, and adult psychotherapy. She has been on the faculties of New York University and the Society for Psychoanalytic Study and Research, among others. She has written extensively on parenting for various publications, including the Psychoanalytic Study of the Child, The International Journal of Infant Observation, The Inner World of the Mother, Newsday’s Parents & Children Magazine, Long Island Parent. She also wrote her popular column, PARENTAL INTELLIGENCE, at Moms Magazine and has been a parenting expert for numerous publications such as Good Housekeeping. and Bustle Lifestyle.

She currently writes for Active Family Magazine (San Francisco) and blogs for Huffington Post. Her new book is Unlocking Parental Intelligence: Finding Meaning in Your Child’s Behavior. To learn more go to Dr. Hollman’s website at www.lauriehollmanphd.com.

Transitioning to Middle School

by Laurie Hollman, Ph.D. Parenting Tips on Helping Your Child Transition to Middle School Transitioning from Elementary School to Middle School is a great challenge for many kids. The expectations of meeting new kids from other schools, having more serious school work, and meeting different teachers are part of the concerns. Then there is just negotiating the new landscape. Finding your way in a larger building, going from classroom to classroom and getting there on time, and meeting new expectations of parents and teachers adds even more stress.

20 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ PARENTING ] How can you help your child prepare for this new

ride on the bus with each day. When a child knows

experience so they can think of it in a positive light with

who they can sit with on the bus, it takes a weight off

new opportunities for friendships and learning?

their shoulders.

10 Parenting Tips for Preparing Your Child for Middle School

6. Drive the bus route if you can get it, so your son or daughter knows what to expect. Learning whether you will be one of the first or the last on the bus or

1. Visit the school several times. Find out when the school

someone in between eases the unknown.

is open for exploring. Your child probably had a spring orientation where they were toured about but that

7. If you know parents of kids who are a year ahead

may seem easily forgotten by the fall. Summer visits

in middle school and your child is comfortable,

without pressure help kids feel more like this is a place

have one of these kids over for a visit so your child is

where they will belong.

familiar with at least one upper class peer who can tell them about school social and academic life. The

2. Go on the school’s website with your child and see the different ways it is organized. They may see

more information they have, the less they fear the unfamiliar.

pictures of teachers that give them a beginning sense of familiarity with their new instructors. They may be

8. A week or two before school starts discuss your child’s

able to see how their assignments will be put online

options for lunch. Do they want to bring it or buy it at

for them to find.

the beginning of the year?. As the term progresses they’ll know what’s more comfortable, but talking

3. Let your child know that he or she is not alone in

about it ahead again eases the unknown.

fearing the unknown. Everybody is in the same boat.

As information is sent home about their homeroom

9. Remember some kids are very open about their

and schedule, go over it together. Answer any

concerns and excitement others are more reticent.

questions and find out the information that you don’t

Be casual about these conversations taking your cues

know that will ease your child’s mind. Take an active

from your child’s interest in engaging in their thoughts

role in calling the school with questions, so your child

about school. Some want to put off thinking about it

knows you are on their side.

as long as possible, but this may not be in their best interest because then the worries hit just before school

4. Do clothes shopping for school during the summer

starts.

when there isn’t pressure. This eases your child into the idea that middle school is really coming but there’s plenty of time to get used to the idea.

10. Most important is to keep an open line of communication between you and your child.

Chatting casually about general summer life lowers

5. Help your child keep in touch with school friends especially those in the neighborhood who they will

the barriers to talking about what might be troubling them. Follow their lead.

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 21

[ EVENTS ]

April Alameda County APRIL 1 Family Hike Coyote Hills Fremont 10am -11:30am www.apm.activecommunities.com Tartan Day Scottish Fair Ardenwood Farms Fremont 10am – 5pm www.apm.activecommunities.com That’s Our Snow White!

Firehouse Arts Center Pleasanton 1pm & 3pm www.ebctonline.org/production

APRIL 1 – 9 The Wheels on the Bus Bay Area Children’s Theatre Oakland Times Vary www.bactheatre.org/tvy/WheelsBus

APRIL 2 Free First Sunday OMCA Oakland 10am – 6pm www.museumca.org Little Farm Sing-Along Tilden Nature Area Berkeley 3pm – 4pm www.apm.activecommunities.com Silly Soloists Oakland Asian Cultural Center Oakland 12pm www.thesfco.org/events/family Peppa Pig Live Fox Theater Oakland 3pm – 5pm www.thefoxoakland.com

22 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

Eat the Earth Tilden Nature Area Berkeley 1pm – 2pm www.ebparks.org

APRIL 3, 10, 17 & 24 Family Storytime Livermore Public Library Livermore 10:15am – 10:45am www.livermorelibrary.net

APRIL 5, 12, 19 & 26 Music & Movement Livermore Public Library Livermore 10:15am – 11am www.livermorelibrary.net

APRIL 7 $ First Fridays Chabot Space & Science Center Oakland 6pm – 10pm www.chabotspace.org/events.htm

APRIL 8 Family Bird Walk 2 Marshlands Rd. Fremont 10am – 12pm www.fws.gov ZooKids Oakland Zoo Oakland 9:30am – 12pm www.oaklandzoo.org/ZooKids_Program.php

APRIL 8 – 30 Fly Guy, the Musical Bay Area Children’s Theatre Berkeley Times Vary www.bactheatre.org/shows/FlyGuy

APRIL 9 Leapin’ Lizards Coyote Hills Fremont 1:30pm – 3pm www.apm.activecommunities.com

APRIL 14 Zoovie Nights Oakland Zoo Oakland 6:30pm – 9:30pm www.oaklandzoo.org/Zoovie_ Nights.php

APRIL 15 The Itsy Bitsy Spider Ardenwood Fremont 10:30am – 11am www.apm.activecommunities.com

APRIL 16 EASTER Nature Puppet Show Tilden Nature Area Berkeley 1pm – 2pm www.apm.activecommunities.com Free Sprouts Family Day Urban Adamah Berkeley 10am – 12pm www.urbanadamah.org/events/ sprouts-april-2017

APRIL 20 Tinkergarten Trial Class Emerald Glen Park Dublin 10:15am – 11:30am www.tinkergarten.com/leaders/ sharon.paley

APRIL 22 CalDay UC Berkeley Berkeley www.calday.berkeley.edu Outdoor Movie Night -Finding Dory!

Lake Chabot Castro Valley 8pm – 10pm www.apm.activecommunities.com

[ EVENTS ]

April Curious Caterpillars Ardenwood Fremont 11am – 12pm www.apm.activecommunities.com

APRIL 23 Little Farm Sing Along Tilden Nature Area Berkeley 2pm – 3pm www.apm.activecommunities.com

Contra Costa County APRIL 1- 8 Little People Session The Golden Skate San Ramon 10am – 12pm www.thegoldenskate.com

APRIL 1- 30 Grease Lesher Center for the Arts Walnut Creek Times Vary www.ccmt.org

APRIL 1 Flower Power Forest Home Farms San Ramon 11am – 2pm www.ci.san-ramon.ca.us

APRIL 2 Disney’s World Lesher Center for the Arts Walnut Creek 2pm www.lesherartscenter.org

APRIL 1, 8 & 15 Chess Club Dougherty Station Library San Ramon 3:30pm – 4:30pm www.ccclib.org/locations/dougherty.html

APRIL 2 Colors of India Kanbar Center San Rafael 11am www.marinjcc.org

APRIL 4 Nature Explorers The Gardens at Heather Farm Walnut Creek 10am – 11:30am www.gardenshf.org

Penguins & Pajamas California Academy of Sciences San Francisco Times Vary www.calacademy.org

APRIL 8 Play Your Way Children’s Discovery Museum San Jose 5:30pm – 8pm www.cdm.org

Free First Tuesday Bedford Gallery Walnut Creek 12pm – 5pm www.bedfordgallery.org

APRIL 14 Preschool Performance Series Village Theater Danville 10am www.villagetheatreshows.com

APRIL 16 EASTER

APRIL 27 Junie B’s Essential Survival Guide to School Hofmann Theatre Walnut Creek 9:30am www.lesherartscenter.showare.com

Out of Area APRIL 1 Stem Superhero Series Bay Area Discovery Museum Sausalito 9am – 5pm www.bayareadiscoverymuseum.org

Email info@activefamilymag.com to subscribe to our weekly email blast for more events!

APRIL 1 -2 Children of the Dragon Festival Children’s Discovery Museum San Jose Times Vary www.cdm.org

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 23

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ]

Karin Volo, an expert in engagement, career, personal and organizational development, is known as the Chief Joy Bringer. She is a co-author of the international best selling book, Engage! With 15+ years experience working with international Fortune 500 companies on two continents, she has insights on business building, cultural transformation, and high performance. Karin works with cultural development, employee engagement, leadership mentoring, professional inspirational speaking and writing. She uses her professional skills and draws from her personal experiences to help individuals and companies thrive.

She is the best selling author of 1,352 Days: An Inspirational Journey From Jail To Joy, the Bringing Joy children’s series, a regular blogger on Huffington Post, a faculty member at the Institute for Inspired Organizational Cultures, and an expert judge on employee engagement in both the UK and the US. Karin’s passion is helping people better their lives through sharing all she has learned on her own journey. Her purpose is bringing joy to the workplace.

5 Tips For Finding Peace When The SH#% Hits The Fan!

by Karin Volo In the last two months, my life has been turned upside down and sideways by two major family crises. Everyone will eventually be fine but it has been challenging to say the least.

I have done my best to manage everything and kept thinking to myself, what am I meant to learn here? So I decided to write down five tools and tricks that I’ve been using myself to maintain my level of inner peace, even when things seem to be falling apart all around me.

1. Stay Present – I may not be the best at practicing mindfulness but in these times, it has certainly helped to just be living in the moment because you don’t know what else may be there. Staying focused on the exact moment, the feelings and making sure that you are giving love, can help. As with all crises, this too shall pass, the sun does eventually come back out.

2. Prioritize – when you’ve got things coming down at you from many directions, it is a matter of figuring out what is most important and focus only on that. All else can wait. We knew with the situation that we faced, that it would require our full focus and energy and therefore we cleared all the other major projects that we had coming. It just wasn’t going to be viable to take on big projects in the middle of having to deal with a crisis. Family comes first above all else and this

24 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS ] was definitely the right decision for us at this time.

5. Self-Care – I can’t emphasis this enough! Be kind to yourself. Get extra sleep. Eat well and get some

3. Reframe – I’m a big believer that things happen for a

exercise. Do things that make you happy and listen to

bigger reason. It can be hard to see that when you’re

uplifting music, even if only for a little mental escapism

in the middle of having your life falling apart around

so that you can feel better. In the middle of the first

you. But if you can lift yourself up to become an

crisis, I was hit with a horrible flu. For a week, I was

observer of your life, you can then start to ask, what is the lesson from this experience? Our attitude is what will make a difference in your outlook and how well you can manage. Reframing helps to make sense out of chaos.

sleeping 10 hours a night. I haven’t gotten that much sleep in years! But my body needed it and I allowed myself the “luxury”, although it was more of a necessity.

Pamper yourself in whatever ways you can so that you can be strong for others.

4. Trust – Life doesn’t happen TO us, it happens FOR us.

If you can break out of the victim mentality of things happening to you and instead realize there must be something in the crisis for you to learn, you become

Crises and chaos are a part of life. And especially during these very turbulent times, I believe we are facing a massive clearing. Things are being brought to light in

empowered. There are times when you just need

everyone’s lives so that we can deal with issues and

to surrender and allow the process, without being

move on energetically. It seems like so many people are

attached to the outcome. This is NOT easy but when

facing tough challenges right now. Know you are not

you can trust that the Universe (or insert the word/

alone and there are tools that can help you manage.

name that resonates with you) will take care of you,

Collectively, we will all get through these challenging

you can move past the pain and suffering and into a

times and I have faith some really amazing times are just

place of gratitude and love…and peace.

around the corner for humanity.

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Now through April 15 in Center Court.

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[ EVENTS ]

EGG-citing

BUNNY SIGHTINGS & EASTER EGG HUNTS!

Alameda County MARCH 24 – APRIL 15 Photos With The Easter Bunny Stoneridge Shopping Center Pleasanton Various hours Prices Vary www.shopstoneridge.com

APRIL 8 (RAIN DATE APRIL 15) Egg Scramble Crab Cove Picnic Area Alameda 10am – 12pm www.alamedaca.gov

APRIL 15 Spring Eggstravaganza Emerald Glen Park Dublin 8:30am – 1pm www.dublin.ca.gov/287/Spring-Eggstravaganza Eggster Learning Festival UC Berkeley Berkeley 10am – 3pm www.eggster.berkeley.edu/eventday.php

APRIL 15 – 16

APRIL 2

Bunny Weekend Fairyland Oakland Various hours Guest ages 1 – 8: $8 Guest under age 1: FREE www.fairyland.org

Bunny Hop Blackhawk Plaza Danville 12:00pm-3:00pm http://www.shopblackhawkplaza.com/ event

Contra Costa County

Easter Pancake Breakfast & Boutique Pleasant Hill Senior Center Pleasant Hill 9am – 11am Adults 11+: $5 Children 5-10 yrs: $3 | 4 & under: Free! www.pleasanthillrec.com/home/specialevents.html

MARCH 17 – APRIL 16 Easter Bunny & Storytelling!

Sunvalley Shopping Center Concord Monday-Saturday 10:00am -9:00pm Sunday 11:00am – 7:00pm www.shopsunvalley.com/easterphotos

MARCH 26 - APRIL 15 Blackhawk Plaza Presents Bunny Photos!

Danville Monday - Saturday: 10:00am – 7:00pm Sunday: 11:00am – 6:00pm http://www.shopblackhawkplaza.com/ event

26 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

APRIL 15

“Egg-Citing” Egg Hunt Pleasant Hill Rec Center Pleasant Hill 9:30am – 12pm Egg Hunt | $7.50/$6.00 (Dist. Res.) www.pleasanthillrec.com/home/specialevents.html

[ EVENTS ]

Pixieland Easter Speggtacular Pixieland Amusement Park Concord 9:30am – 11:30am Prices Vary www.pixieland.com/events.html Spring Egg Hunt Arlington Park & Clubhouse El Cerrito 10:00am Free www.el-cerrito.org Lions Club Easter Egg Hunt Martinez Waterfront Park Martinez 10am – 12pm Free www.cityofmartinez.org

Out of Area APRIL 6 – 15

Photos with the Easter Bunny Jelly Belly Visitor Center Fairfield Various Hours Prices Vary Free www.jellybelly.com/event-calendar

APRIL 15 – 16

APRIL 16

Eggstraordinary Egg Hunt Roaring Camp Railroad Felton 11:00am & 12:30pm $20- $27 www.roaringcamp.com/events#easter_ Hunt

25th Annual Easter Parade & Spring Celebration Union Street San Francisco 10:00am – 5:00pm Free www.unionstreetsf.com

APRIL 15

Spring Eggstravaganza Sharon Medows San Francisco 11:00am – 2:00pm $8 per person www.sftourismtips.com

Brunch with Mr. Jelly Belly and the Easter Bunnies Jelly Belly Visitor Center Fairfield 10:00am – 11:30am Adults 3+ $19.99 2 & Under Free www.jellybelly.com/event-calendar Children’s Wonderland Easter Egg Hunt Children’s Wonderland Vallejo 1st Hunt- 10am | 2nd Hunt 1:30pm All Ages $3 | Children Under Free www.gvrd.org/?page=Easter_Egg_Hunt

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 27

[ MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIPS ]

Carrie Contey is an internationally recognized coach, author, speaker and educator. Her work offers a new perspective on human development, parenting and family life. She guides, supports and inspires her clients to live with wide open and courageous hearts so they can approach family life with skill, spaciousness and joy.

Carrie received her PhD in prenatal and perinatal psychology and is masterful at synthesizing and articulating the science, psychology, and spirituality of humanhood. She is the creator of “Evolve” a year-long “personal growth through parenting” program. She is also the cofounder of the Slow Family Living movement and the co-author of CALMS: A Guide To Soothing Your Baby. Carrie has appeared on NBC’s The Today Show, NPR, CBS radio and in many publications including Time, Parenting and The Boston Globe. Currently she lives, works and plays in Austin, TX but spends as much time as she can traveling, speaking, creating things that make family life more wonderful and living her very own extraordinary life to the fullest! To learn more, visit www.carriecontey.com

Know Your Tendencies and Try Something New – Family

by Carrie Contey I’ve worked with thousands of families, researched development for years, and believe me – there’s no one right way to do healthy humanhood.

This is why experimenting in family life is crucial. You are evolving, they are evolving. Choose to EXPERIMENT! Be curious about what works for you and your family.

One way to start identifying opportunities for experiments, as in, “Let’s try something new…!” Is to know your tendency and try the opposite. Below I listed four possible scenarios that families grapple with all the time. Use these examples to get your wheels turning around your tendencies, and how you can experiment.

28 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ MARRIAGE & RELATIONSHIPS ] When the situation arises:

connect and be together. Experiment with ways dinner

You feel rushed to get out the door in morning…

can serve that goal.

And your tendency is to: Speed up, get annoyed and bark orders…

Experiment with this:

When the situation arises: Your partnership gets ignored because it feels like the kid(s) have precedence…

Slow down. Take a few breaths. Observe before making your request. Notice what your people are doing.

And your tendency is to:

Connect with them in their world before you say what

Point the finger at your partner for not making any

you need. Make eye contact as you let them know

effort…

what’s going to happen next. Finally, give yourself a moment to appreciate and delight in the fact that they

Experiment with this:

are part of your world!

Take responsibility and give the love you’re looking for!

When the situation arises: Your people argue and pick on each other…

Send a sexy text message during the day. Look your partner in the eye and thank them for doing something routine. (i.e. “Thank you for taking out the trash.” “Thank

And your tendency is to:

you for picking up the kids.” “Thank you for being on this

Yell over them and try to shut it down…

crazy adventure with me.”). Surprise them with a date night and organize a sitter/etc.

Experiment with this: Pause. Give them space to see if they will work it out on their own. If you enter the dynamic, name how you’re feeling in a way that disrupts it, and still communicates what’s happening for you (i.e. “YIKES! I’m feeling frazzled by all of this arguing!”)

When the situation arises:

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And your tendency is to: Take it personally, feeling disrespected, resentful, and dreading dinner time…

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Experiment with this: Shake it up! Have a “fancy dinner” one night, and encourage everyone to pretend to be their most proper selves (you can even talk with accents). Or have dinner in the bath tub, on the living room floor, or on a picnic blanket outside. Remind yourself what dinner is

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for beyond just getting some food into everyone – to APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 29

[ PARENTING ]

Jennifer S. White is a voracious reader, obsessive writer, passionate yoga instructor and drinker of hoppy ales. She’s also a devoted mama and wife (a stay-at-home yogi). She considers herself to be one of the funniest people that ever lived and she’s also an identical twin. Jennifer is a columnist for The Huffington Post, A Plus, elephant journal and Be You Media Group, and has over 40 articles published on the wellness website MindBodyGreen. Her yoga-themed column Your Personal Yogi ran in the newspaper Toledo Free Press.

She holds a Bachelor’s degree in geology, absolutely no degrees in anything related to literature, and she currently owns a wheel of cheese. If you want to learn more about Jennifer, make sure to check out her writing, as she’s finally put her tendencies to overthink and overshare to good use. Jennifer is the author of The Best Day of Your Life and The Art of Parenting: Love Letters from a Mother, available Amazon and Barnes and Noble. Her brand new book A Quiet Kiss just released this summer, and is also available on Amazon. www.jenniferswhite.com

30 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

Spring Break with Kids Is a Mindset

by Jennifer S. White Next week my oldest child is on spring break.

She’s in preschool, only during the mornings, and even this is only four days a week, but for little kids this relatively short period of time meets so many needs that I can’t.

She gets to play with friends, get energy out, try new crafts, ride the school bus, eat snacks I don’t keep at home, etc, etc.

Next week we will be staying home. We will likely have on Mickey Mouse Clubhouse in the mornings. I’ll probably not feel so rushed putting on my mascara. (These things seem inconsequential, but they are huge—they are spring break!—to me.)

We’ll play together—my oldest, my youngest, and me. Maybe we’ll go outside in the backyard, if the weather’s nice, or perhaps we’ll make a stop through the cupcake drive-thru. Regardless of what simple activities I decide to do with my kids, it will be just me, and them, and a decent chunk of hours during

[ PARENTING ] the day. No other adults. No wine. Never enough coffee.

dishes, and frustration. This said, I routinely subscribe to

And I can’t wait.

the “it can wait” mentality, because it’s true that a dirty plate will be able to sit in the sink until later tonight, but

I can’t wait to not feel hurried to get her to finish

my “baby” talking to me about what she’s imagining

breakfast so that we can brush her teeth. I can’t wait to

while she’s playing, or my oldest giving me a great big

wash my hair in the morning and not have a time limit—

hug for no reason are temporary. (Try asking a kid for a

shorter than my other time slot for eating my peanut

previously-attempted hug after placing that glass in the

butter toast—to dry it. I can’t wait to see my child’s face every day, all day long. (I’m a cheese-ball, I know.)

She’s transitioning to kindergarten next year. And I call my youngest “the baby,” but she’s actually more of “the toddler.” In short, I feel like I’m in that special, fleeting time in my life, and I could easily miss it with worry and stress, if I’m not careful; if I don’t just stop, pause and be here.

Life sometimes feels like it’s about meeting this particular

drying rack, and see just how fast an attention span is off to something else.)

So next week, on our spring-break staycation, you’ll likely find me with a toddler mildly covered in food, or with wet cheeks from little girls’ kisses. You’ll find us in the backyard with the soccer ball, or in the car headed to the zoo. I’m sure you’ll find me desperately waiting for my husband to come home, so that I can tag him and go to

milestone to get to that one over there, but it’s not. Life—

the bathroom by myself. I’m sure you’ll also observe me

cheese-ball and true—is meant to be enjoyed, savored,

taking deep breaths so that I don’t lose my temper.

held onto—felt.

I hope you’ll find me sitting on the floor reading books, I’m feeling nostalgic for the baby that my oldest once

and doing nothing in particular, except for taking in that

was, as I watch her grow into a delicate yet strong little

dimple that forms on the side of my oldsest daughter’s

girl. I’m feeling equally soft-hearted for “the baby” who

smile, or touching my youngest’s hair that reminds me of

I can breezily hold a conversation with, and who is less

a baby duckling. I hope I’m not too frazzled to remember

and less of a baby with every day that drifts by us.

how precious being a mom is, in this quick snap of my lifetime.

Life blows past us—if we’re not careful—especially as parents to young kids. But having children is not easy.

It’s about being responsible for these precious little lives that are taking shape; helping them to flourish and blossom, while also being mindful and aware enough to appreciate each small step.

My littlest is currently obsessed with doing anything that she can all by herself, primarily eating. She’s gloriously inside of that food-in-the-hair phase, and I’m loving it.

Life is way too brief to worry about stains on favorite clothes, or a handful of hummus in freshly washed hair.

(And this is coming from someone pretty darn anal.)

I don’t want to be that mom who throws her kid happily on the school bus, but I usually am—and it’s more for her than it is for myself. Kids should love school. Parents should have things to do extraneously from being a parent. Still, this spring break—although we’re not going to Florida, or doing much of anything, really—can be a highlight on the reel that is the movie of my life.

Life is for many things, but for me, right now, it’s about raising two of the most special little human beings I’ve ever been lucky enough to meet, much less call my daughters. It’s about knowing I’m lucky, despite the

Spring is dawning all around my family and me. I feel like

stress. It’s about remembering that these tiny faces grow

I want to plant my feet in the dirt alongside the crocus

bigger and bigger.

flowers, and dig in, and be as present within my life as I’m able. Don’t get me wrong, I know that I’ll still have

It’s understanding that spring break is—fingers

all of our normal, daily requirements, like diapers, and

crossed—a mindset.

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 31

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

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Spanish Immersion Classes & Camps  Engaging curriculum uses music, art & games

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www.vivaelespanol.org • 925-962-9177 Lafayette • Pleasanton • And schools all over the Bay Area

PERSONALIZED INSTRUCTION FOR ADULTS, CHILDREN AND TODDLERS. SUMMER CAMPS & HORSEMANSHIP CLINICS

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Coaching for the beginner and competitive show rider.

CALL NOW FOR MORE INFO:

925.960.9696

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Ask for:

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5111 Dolan Rd, Livermore CA 94551

www.showstables.com

32 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

t h a t FITS!

Walnut Creek traditional summer camp experience AA Traditional Summer Camp

925.937.6500

•

San Ramon & Alamo

Adventuredaycamp.com

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 33

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Summer Alameda County ALAMEDA Alameda School of Music 1307 High St. 510.769.0195 www.alamusic.org

Camp Bladium 800 West Tower Ave 510.814.4999 www.bladiumalameda.com/ youth-kids/kids-camps

Monkey Business Camp 2880A Sacramento St. 510.540.6025

Bee Best Learning 20394 San Miguel Ave. 510.728.2110

Quarry Lane School 6363 Tassajara Rd. 925.829.8000

www.monkeybusinesscamp.com

www.beebestlearning.com/

www.quarrylane.org

Sticky Art Lab 1682 University Ave. 510.981.1148

DUBLIN

FREMONT

East Bay SPCA Animal Camp 4651 Gleason Dr. 925.479.9670

Learning Bee Summer Camp 39977 Mission Blvd.

510.226.8408

www.eastbayspca.org/camp

www.learningbeeusa.com

City of Dublin 100 Civic Plaza 925.556.4500 www.ci.dublin.ca.us

Ohlone for Kids 43600 Mission Blvd.

510.659.6000

www.stickyartlab.com

Young Writers Camp UC Berkeley Campus 510.642.0971 www.bawpwritingcamp.org

Green Stuff Summer Camp UC Berkeley Botanical Gardens 510.643.4832 www.botanicalgarden.berkeley.edu

Lawrence Hall of Science UC Berkeley 510.642.5134 Play-Well TEKnologies 2203 Central Ave. 510.747.7529 & 1011 Chestnut St. 510.227.9378 www.play-well.org

BERKELEY Music Discovery Workshop 2005 Berryman St. 510.528.1725 www.sfems.org

www.lawrencehallofscience.org

BERKELEY/ECHO LAKE Berkeley Echo Lake Camp Lot #7 Echo Lakes Rd 530.659.7539 www.cityofberkeley.info/camps

CASTRO VALLEY Skye Valley Training Camp 10250 Crow Canyon Rd 925.858.8825 www.psi.lunariffic.com/~skyev0/

St. John’s Camp Elmwood 2727 College Ave. 510.845.6830 www.stjohnsberkeley.org/ campelmwood

Camp Kee Tov 1301 Oxford St. 510.842.2372 www.campkeetov.org

Habitot 2065 Kittredge St. 510.647.1111 ext. 14

Sarah’s Science This Land Is Your Land Summer Day Camp 21525 Knoll Way 510.581.3739 www.sarahscience.com

Play-Well TEKnologies 21201 Independent School Rd & 6395 Palo Verde Rd 415.460.5210 www.play-well.org

www.habitot.org/museum/activities_camps.html

34 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

Valley Christian School 7500 Inspiration Dr. 925.560.6270 www.ValleyChristianSchools.org

Edge Gymnastics Training Center 6780 Sierra Court St. K 925.479.9904 www.edge-gymnastics.com

Kidz Kraftz Quail Creek Cir. 925.271.0015 www.kidzkraftz.com/camps

Tri-Valley YMCA 6693 Sierra Ln 925.263.4444 www.trivalley.ymcaeastbay.org

Extended Day Child Care 8435 Davona Dr. 925.829.4043 & 7997 Vomac Rd. 925.551.8170 7243 Tamarack Dr. 925.833.0127 & 5301 Hibernia Dr. 925.803.4154 & 3300 Antone Way 925.826.5538 www.extendeddaychildcare.com

www.ohlone.edu/org/ohloneforkids

HAYWARD Hayward Area Recreation Park District (H.A.R.D.) Day Camps 510.881.6700 www.haywardrec.org

Play-Well TEKnologies 2058 D St. 415.460.5210 www.play-well.org

LIVERMORE Horizons East Equestrian Center 5111 Doolan Rd. 925.960.9696 www.showstables.com

Roy’s Magic Camp 2466 8th St. 925.455.0600 www.magiccamp.org

Camp Arroyo Taylor Family Foundation 5535 Arroyo Rd. 925.371.8401 www.ebparks.org/activities/daycamps/parks_camp_arroyo

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Camps Saddle to Ride Topline Training, Inc. 4180 Greenville Rd. 925.858.3933

Lake Merritt Boating Center Youth Boating Camps 568 Bellevue Ave. 510.238.2196

City of Pleasanton Summer Programs 200 Old Bernal Ave. 925.931.3436

Backyard Explorers Corner of Babel Ln & Cowell Rd. 925.671.3118

www.saddle2ride.com

www.sailoakland.com

www.ci.pleasanton.ca.us

www.cityofconcord.org/recreation/ summercamps/backyardexp.htm

Xtreme Force Dance Company 847 Rincon Ave. 925.455.6054

Raskob Learning Institute 3520 Mountain Blvd.

510.436.1275

Expressions Dance & Art 3015 Hopyard Rd. Ste. I 925.200.9908

www.raskobinstitute.org

www.expressions-dance-arts.com/

Kids N’ Dance 3840 Macarthur Blvd.

510.531.4400

Young Ivy Academy 5460 Sunol Blvd (#3) 925.548.0188

www.kidsndance.com

www.youngivyacademy.com

www.doublediamondsportsacademy.com

MOCHA Summer Camp 1625 Clay St. 510.465.8770

Inspire Music Academy 2340 Santa Rita Rd. Ste. 7 925.461.3266

Valley Montessori 1273 N. Livermore Ave. 925.455.8021

www.mocha.org

www.inspiremusicacademy.com

Play-Well TEKnologies Various Locations Oakland 415.460.5210

Contra Costa County

www.xtremeforcedanceco.com

Double Diamond Sports Academy 2272 Research Dr. 925.830.9765

www.valleymontessorischool.com

OAKLAND Lakeshore Children’s Center 3534 Lakeshore Ave. 510.893.4048 www.lakeshorechildrenscenter.org

Urban Adventure Camp 5701 Cabot Dr. 510.339.0676

www.play-well.org

PLEASANTON Gingerbread Preschool 4333 Black Ave. 925.931.3430 www.ci.pleasanton.ca.us/services/ recreation/gb/gbhome.html

www.urbanadventurecamps.com

East Bay SPCA Animal Camp 8323 Baldwin St. 510.569.0702

Extended Day Child Care 5199 Black Ave. 925.846.5519 www.extendeddaychildcare.com

www.eastbayspca.org/camp

California Shakespeare Theater Summer Conservatory 4660 Harbord Dr. 510.809.3293 www.calshakes.org/v4/educ/summer_conservatories.html

Quarry Lane School - East 3750 Boulder St. 925.846.9400 www.quarrylane.org

Quarry Lane School - West 4444B Black Ave. 925.462.6300 www.quarrylane.org

Oakland Summer ZooCamp 9777 Golf Links Rd. 510.632.9525 www.oaklandzoo.org

Yang Fan Academy 4160 Hacienda Dr. St. 100 925.699.4664

DANVILLE City of Danville Camps 420 Front St. 925.314.3400 www.danville.ca.gov/Recreation/ Camps

ANTIOCH City of Antioch Parks and Recreation 213 “F” St 925.776.7070

Vision Tech Camps 117 Town & Country Dr. St. B 925.699.9602 www.visiontechcamps.com

Devil Mountain Summer Camp at Athenian School 2100 Mt. Diablo Scenic Blvd 925.837.5375 www.athenian.org

www.ci.antioch.ca.us/Recreation

Color Bundles 301 Hartz Ave. #104 925.727.3137 www.colorbundles.com

Four Stars Gymnastics Academy 1799 Vineyard Dr. 925.778.8650

Camp Brainy Bunch 741 Brookside Dr. 510.548.4800

www.fourstarsgym.com

www.campbrainybunch.com

CONCORD

Quest Therapeutic Camps Charlotte Wood Middle School 600 El Captain Dr. 925.743.2900

City of Concord Parks and Recreation 925.671.3404 www.cityofconcord.org/recreation/ summercamps

www.questcamps.com

Camp Concord in South Lake Tahoe 1000 Mt. Tallac Trailhead Rd South Lake Tahoe 530.541.1203 www.ci.concord.ca.us/recreation/ camp

www.yfacademy.org

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 35

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Summer The Growing Room 925.837.4392

The Academy 925.820.5808 thegrowingroom.org/camps

LAFAYETTE California Shakespeare Theater Summer Conservatory 1000 Upper Happy Valley Rd 510.809.3293 www.calshakes.org/v4/educ/ summer_conservatories.html

Roughing It Day Camp 1010 Oak Hill Rd. 925.283.3795

Diamond Hills Sports Club 1510 Neroly Rd. 925.420.4575

Camp ARF for Kids 2890 Mitchell Dr. 925.256.1273

www.roughingit.com

www.sparetimeclubs.com

www.youth.arf.net

Sienna Ranch 3232 Deer Hill Rd. 925.283.6311

ORINDA

City of Walnut Creek Summer Camps 1666 North Main St. 925.943.5899

www.siennaranch.net

Sherman Swim School 1075 Carol Ln. 925.283.2100 www.shermanswim.com

Merriewood Children’s Center 561 Merriewood Dr. 925.284.2121

Kids N’ Dance 3369 Mt. Diablo 925.284.7388

BandWorks Summer Camp 28 Orinda Way 925.254.2445 www.bandworks.com/summer_ orinda.php

Orinda Academy 19 Altarinda Rd. 925.478.4504 www.orindaacademy.org

Camp Doodle 66 St. Stephens Dr.

www.merriewood.org

www.campdoodles.com

MARTINEZ

PLEASANT HILL

John Muir Mountain Day Camp John Muir National Historic Site 925.680.8807

City of Pleasant Hill Camps 147 Gregory Ln 925.682.0896 www.pleasanthillrec.com

PITTSBURG

www.kidsndance.com

www.johnmuirassociation.org/ muircamp/index.php

French For Fun 3381 Mt. Diablo Blvd 925.283.9822

Rancho Saguaro 1050 Pereira Rd. 925.788.5200

www.frenchforfun.com

www.ranchosaguaro.com

SAN RAMON

Lafayette Tennis Club 3125 Camino Diablo 925.937.2582

MORAGA

City of San Ramon Camps 2226 Camino Ramon 925.973.2500

www.lafayettetennis.com

Husky House for Kids 3855 Happy Valley Rd. 925.283.7100 www.huskyhouseforkids.org/ summer-camp-programs

Lafayette Community Center Camps 500 Saint Mary’s Rd. 925.284.2232 www.lafayetterec.org

Gaels Summer Camp 1928 St Mary’s Rd. 925.631.4FUN

City of Pittsburg Parks and Recreation 300 Presido Ln. 925.252.4842 www.ci.pittsburg.ca.us

www.ci.san-ramon.ca.us

www.smcgaels.com

WALNUT CREEK

Camp Saklan 1678 School St. 925.376.7900

Adventure Day Camp Seven Hills School 975 North San Carlos Dr. 925.937.6500

www.saklan.org/about-us/campsaklan

OAKLEY City of Oakley Parks and Recreation 3231 Main St. 925.625.7044 www.ci.oakley.ca.us

36 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

www.adventuredaycamp.com

Lindsay Wildlife Museum Summer Science Camp 1931 First Ave. 925.935.1978 www.wildlife-museum.org

www.walnut-creek.org

Castle Rock Arabians 1350 Castle Rock Rd. 925.933.3701 www.castlerockarabians.com/

Multiple Locations The Growing Room Academy Various locations around the Bay Offers: 3,4 and 5 Day Camps 925.837.4392 www.thegrowingroom.org

Camp Rocks: Girl Scouts of Northern California Offered at 5 locations: San Rafael (Camp Bothin), Santa Cruz (Skylark Ranch), San Jose (Camp Metro Day Camp), North Lake Tahoe (Deer Lake), and the Sierra Nevada Mountains (Sugar Pine) 800.447.4475 ext. 2091 www.camprocks.org

Mad Science Camp Offered at several local Recreation sites and Community Centers 925.687.1900 www.mtdiablo.madscience.org

Steve and Kate’s Camp Danville, Dublin, Fremont, Oakland, Walnut Creek and Berkeley 415.389.5437 www.steveandkatescamp.com

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Camps Camp Galileo Alameda, Alamo, Berkeley, San Ramon, Walnut Creek, Fremont, Oakland, Lafayette and Orinda 510.595.7293

Club Sport Fremont, San Ramon, Pleasanton and Walnut Creek 925.938.8700

Mountain Camp Woodside 302 Portola Rd. Portola Valley 650.576.2267

Silver Creek Sportsplex 800 Embedded Way San Jose 408.224.8774

www.clubsports.com

www.mountaincampwoodside.com

www.gotoplex.com

www.galileo-learning.com

Camp Edmo Alameda, Fremont, and Oakland 415.282.6673

Camp Tawonga 131 Steuart Ste. 460 San Francisco 415.543.2267

College For Kids 1700 W. Hillsdale Blvd.

San Mateo 650.574.6149

www.campedmo.org

www.tawonga.org

www.collegeforkids-smccd.com

Kids’ Carpentry Berkeley, Lafayette, Alameda, Oakland, Alamo & Walnut Creek 510.524.9232

SF Zoo Camp Sloat Blvd. & the Great Highway San Francisco 415.753.7080 www.sfzoo.org

School of Rock Summer Camp 711 South B St. San Mateo, San Jose & Palo Alto 650.347.3474

KinderCare Walnut Creek, Concord, Danville, Martinez and Clayton 888.523.6765 www.kindercare.com/summercamp

Viva el Espanol!

Lafayette, Piedmont, Pleasanton & San Anselmo 925.962.9177 www.vivaelespanol.org/summerprograms.php

Stratford School Summer Sports Camp & Enrichment Danville, Fremont, Los Gatos, Morgan Hill and Pleasanton 925.737.0001 www.stratfordschools.com

www.kidscarpentry.com

www.schoolofrock.com

TechKnowHow Kids Dublin, Berkeley, Fremont, Livermore, Oakland & Pleasanton 650.638.0500 www.techknowhowkids.com

Almaden Equestrian Center 20100 Almaden Rd. San Jose 408.927.0232 www.almadenequestriancenter.net

Kennolyn Camps 8205 Glen Haven Rd. Soquel 831.479.6714 www.kennolyncamps.com

Out of Area Golden Arrow Camps 644 Pollasky Avenue, Ste. 100 Clovis, 93612 800.554.CAMP www.goldarrowcamp.com

Sky hawk’s Sports Camp Various locations around the Bay Area 800.804.3509 www.skyhawks.com

Coppercreek Camp 1887 Williams Valley Rd. Greenville, 95947 800.350.0006 www.coppercreek.com

Lango Language Summer Camps Serving Alamo, Blackhawk, Brentwood, Briones, Canyon, Clayton, Concord, Danville, Martinez, Moraga, Orinda, Pacheco, Pittsburg, Pleasant Hill, San Ramon, Walnut Creek and surrounding regions 888.445.2646 www.langokids.com/parent/kidslanguage-summer-camps

Camp Unalayee 3921 East Bayshore Rd. Palo Alto 650.969.6313 www.unalayee-summer-camp.com

CYO Summer Camp 2136 Bohemian Hwy Occidental, 95465 707.874.0200 www.camp.cccyo.org

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 37

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

10 Benefits Of Camp that You Don’t Get at School

by Ann Woods, Roughing It Day Camp

Without a doubt, school is important! Academic success is important to parents of school-aged children, and schools are focused on meeting standards and test scores more than ever. There is so much that can be learned outside the traditional classroom and the summer break offers a perfect opportunity to take advantage of these benefits.

An outdoor summer camp is a place where children of all ages can learn, grow, explore, make new friends and find exercise and fresh air in abundance. Camp offers a unique opportunity with fun and exciting adventures that help campers acquire new life skills, gain confidence and learn to be part of a team.

Camp takes a different approach to a child’s education. Instead of focusing on gaining book knowledge, camp helps children gain knowledge through handson experiences and applying this knowledge to every day life. Consider these 10 amazing benefits kids can gain from an outdoor summer camp: 1. Getting Connected to Nature from Significant Time Spent Outdoors – Spending time in nature encourages children to strengthen their connection to the natural world. They can relax, get a balance in their lives, and learn to appreciate and care for the environment.

Ann Woods, Owner and Director of Roughing It Day Camp since 1972.

Ann founded Roughing It in 1972 with her husband, Hobie and together they serve as Camp Directors.

Roughing It celebrates its 44th year this summer and offers camp programs for children from 4-16 years old. Roughing It is an all outdoor tranditional Summer Day Camp located at the Lafayette

2. Exercise and Physical Activity – Children who spend more time outside are physically healthier because it allows them to stay active and increase their fitness levels. It also helps them improve their vision and increases the levels of Vitamin D improving bone and heart health. Research shows that spending time outside can also help reduce the symptoms of ADHD1, and improve test scores in subjects like math, reading, writing, and listening.

3. Get Kids Unplugged – Camp promotes interaction between kids outside of the realm of online social media building real life interpersonal communication skills. It draws them away from their computer screens and encourages them to get their hands dirty and be creative, and connect with one another

Reservoir. Each summer continues a proud tradition of helping children grow in wonderful ways. Roughing It offers free transportation to and from camp each day with 36 bus stops across the Tri Valley, Contra Costa, East Bay and San Francisco communities. For more information go to www.roughingit.com

4. Learning to Work as Part of a Team, Preparing for Jobs in 21st Century – Participating in group camp activities promotes communication, initiative, adaptability, collaboration and leadership. Campers learn to collectively make accomplish goals together, make decisions that will affect the whole group and develop a sense of community with their peers. These life skills are important skills job recruiters seek as more jobs become project based or accomplished by teams.

38 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ SUMMER CAMP ] 5. Healthy Risk Taking – Healthy forms of risk taking through age appropriate and adult supervised camp activities encourages kids to step out of their comfort zone. Trying new things, challenging themselves and discovering new strengths heightens their confidence as they learn to succeed on their own.

6. Developing Grit – Camp provides activities and experiences that are often completely new for most children. Trying new things requires commitment and resilience at camp, and kids learn to solve problems and work towards finding a solution to situations they may find more challenging.

7. Independence – Campers are encouraged to try new things and meet new people. They have ample opportunities for decision-making, problem-solving, teaching and learning. Camp counselors help them to learn to do things for themselves, by themselves and to be responsible for their belonging and their experiences.

8. Learning Social Skills and Building Friendships – Summer camp is uniquely suited as a place where campers learn to form lasting bonds of friendship with kids: outside their school and neighborhood.

Especially if they attend a camp for several weeks, they have the consistency over time, to enjoy new experiences, shared activities and learn under the guidance of their adult counselors. Camp is a safe environment where children learn to make friends and how to be a friend. Being part a summer camp group, kids focus on working with their peers as a cohesive unit and are required to be consciously aware of others’ needs as well as their own in order to work well

lessons at camp is crucial to a successful program.

Caring, sensitive, well-trained staff members who are excellent roll models are often the most significant positive influence on a child’s camp experience. At camp, counselors help campers, shy or outgoing, get the most out of themselves through their participation in a supportive, positive group setting. Campers also have a chance to be a group leader in certain activities, whether it be leading the hike or leading a skit. These opportunities serve to encourage kids to take on leadership roles in other areas of their life and give them the confidence to do so.

The nearing of summer often sends parents into a tailspin of what to do with their child’s free time. Do they spend their time learning more inside a classroom? Or is it a time for them to play, have fun and learn from their “other education” at an outdoor summer camp?

Whereas school recognizes good grades and test scores, camp applauds a wider range of achievements and accomplishment that are very fulfilling on a personal level. It’s no doubt summer camp is a wonderful place where they can also develop life skills and lasting happy memories.

2017

ZOOCAMP ZooCamp is an exciting week of animal adventure, nature discovery, and fun for children (pre-K through high school).

together.

Camps run mid-June through mid-August.

9. Exciting Different Outdoor Activities – Camp provides an opportunity for children to learn new and different activities such as fishing, swimming, kayaking, canoeing, horse riding, rowing, Geo-caching, outdoor

Registration opens mid-March!

cooking and many more activities that are specific to the camp environment. Kids will go home with a wide array of tools and skills under their belt after a summer spent at camp.

connect with Oakland Zoo online 10.Leadership Skills – A traditional camp depends on positive, strong leaders. Having the right leaders to guide children through the important skills and life

oaklandzoo.org

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 39

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Summer Camp ‘17 Register Today!

THE GROWING ROOM

925.837.4392

AT T H E G R OW I N G R O O M

Customize your summer fun with enrichment classes, music lessons, field trips and more!

J u n e 5 – Au g u st 9

THE ACADEMY

925.820.5808 thegrowingroom.org/camps info@thegrowingroom.org

THE ACADEMY

|

G R A D E S K– 5 • H O U R S : 6 : 3 0 A M – 6 : 3 0 P M ENRICHMENT CLASSES FOCUSING ON: STEAM, Sports & Fitness,

Dance, Culture, Cooking, Minecraft Play and more!

Specialized Classes offered for an additional fee in Robotics, Computer Programming, Sewing, Arts/Theater, Languages, Chess and more!

NEIL ARMSTRONG

|

TASSAJARA HILLS

|

HIDDEN HILLS

|

LIVE OAK

Meet friends. Learn about animals. Have a fur-tastic time!

Camps for kids entering grades 1-12 in Oakland and Dublin

Register today at eastbayspca.org/summercamp 40 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Summer @ Stratford

Let the Adventure Begin…

Stratford offers an innovative, customizable summer camp experience — from academics to engineering; science to music and art; sports to writing workshops; and so much more! A variety of summer programs are available for preschool through 9th grade.

Find a campus near you and explore summer at

StratfordSchools.com/summer-camp

Camp begins June 19 O

LS

S

Accrediting Commission for Schools

O

GE

SCH

Preschool State License Numbers: 073402482, 013417816, 013420588, 434404890, 434408056, 434407977, 434404336, 434406722, 434408877, 384001837, 434410807, 434410816, 073406680, 013420939, 414004014, 434413440. © 2017 Stratford Schools, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

ASSOCIAT I

OF

WE S

RN

ON

TE

TM

LE

The curiosity to reach.

The courage to grasp.

AND CO

L

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 41

[ SUMMER CAMP ]

Camp Spotlight HORIZONS EAST EQUESTRIAN CENTER Campers at Horizons East will enjoy riding lessons, lectures, crafts, and demonstrations each day. If you have a “horse-crazy” child at home beginner or expert, this is the place for them!

To register: www.showstables.com 925.960. 9696

THE GROWING ROOM There is so much to explore at The Growing Room’s weekly Summer Camp! The Growing Room features Academy Classes in specialized skills such as reading, writing, language studies, music, yoga, sports, fitness and tutoring.

Camps run June 5 – August 9 with 3, 4 and 5 day camps available.

Kids of all ages are welcome to join this unforgettable and fun summer camp located at 4 convenient elementary schools: Tassajara Hills, Neil Armstrong, Live Oak and Hidden Hills. Registration is now open!

To register: www.thegrowingroom.org 925.837.4392 42 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017

BAY AREA DISCOVERY MUSEUM Discovery Camps provide childdirected, inquiry driven learning through project-based, hands-on activities designed to intentionally boost creativity, STEM skills and critical thinking. Children come away with the skills and tools to support lifelong discoveries.

Summer Discovery Camps run on a weekly basis from May 29 – August 25. Summer camps are available for children in preschool through 9th grade.

To register: www.baykidsmuseum.org 415.339.3931

®

Preschool

Education is a Lifelong Commitment

®

Discover Quarry Lane

NOW ENROLLING Join our Open House every Wednesday! www.QuarryLane.org/Preschool

Toddler, Preschool and Pre-Kindergarten Academic-Based Curriculum Passionate, Experienced Educators

PLEASANTON WEST CAMPUS Preschool and Pre-Kindergarten 4444B Black Ave., Pleasanton, CA

925.462.6300

Full and Half Day Schedules Computer, Spanish, Music, P.E., and Library Two Preschool Campuses in Pleasanton

PLEASANTON EAST CAMPUS Infant through Pre-Kindergarten 3750 Boulder St., Pleasanton, CA

925.846.9400

APRIL 2017 | ACTIVE FAMIL Y 43 CA Licenses: 013411303, 013411304, 013411305, 013417681

44 ACTIVE FAMIL Y | APRIL 2017