THE BURMAN
CHRONICLE
MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 1
1/28/20 11:26 PM
EDITOR’S NOTE: 02 JASMINE PICKETT MENTAL HEALTH: 03 ANONYMOUS 05 COPING WITH MENTAL HEALTH 07 THE DARKNESS 08 ANONYMOUS 09 1 CORINTHIANS 15:33 11 HOW TO COPE WITH MY MENTAL HEALTH 101 .. Shaun Young 13 COPING TO FIND PEACE .. Brenda Ngetich 15 MENTAL HEALTH .. Calin Gillespie 17 ANONYMOUS 19 UNDERSTANDING ATTEMPTED SUICIDES .. Alexis Mcgill 21 WHAT WORKS FOR ME .. Kailey Smith 23 WITHOUT A VISION THE PEOPLE PERISH .. Dr. Darren George 25 SUCCESS STORIES ..Danilyn Page 26 MENTAL HEALTH .. Danilyn Page POETRY: 27 LONELY .. Noreen Moise 28 MENTAL HEALTH BE MINDFUL .. Shaun Young
ENTS MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 2
1/28/20 11:26 PM
“Sometimes you’re not gonna have support from anyone. Keep going anyway. You’re strong enough to make it.”
TABLE OF
CONTMENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 3
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Well. It’s true. Many days it hurts to be alive. It’s not that I don’t try to focus on something other than the pain, but when the pain is in your brain and not something that can be seen by the people around you, it’s hard. I told someone once that I didn’t know how to describe how I was feeling except to say that it hurt like some kind of physical pain that was manifested in my head and my heart. They looked at me and nodded and said “That’s because you’re in pain, and it’s valid.” I’d never had depression validated as painful before, but as soon as they said it I knew it was true. I was in pain. Every thought I had, every interaction, all of it was laced with pain. I wish I could tell you that after this realization I figured out how to control these feelings of mine. That there was some magic pill I could take that would make it all go away. That if I prayed enough, God would take my anxiety, my depression. But I can’t. I’m still learning the difference between the pain of growth and the pain of the past. The difference between fear of the uncomfortable and anxiety over living in a world of constant motion. The darkness of depression versus the soft blue glow of sadness. For a long time, I let myself believe that I was making it all up in my head. I convinced myself that because it wasn’t a pain that could be seen outwardly, it didn’t exist at all. I want you to know that it does. I haven’t stumbled upon that magic pill that will take the pain of my mental illnesses away. God hasn’t taken this from me, either. Sometimes my day just ends and I remind myself that tomorrow is a new start and that I have survived my journey this far. There have been many times when I thought my sadness would crush me, but it didn’t. Existing under the weight of mental illness is excruciating. That doesn’t mean that I’m not strong enough to endure it. It just means that sometimes I need a reminder that what I’m feeling is real and valid and not something I’ve made up. So. If you need a reminder, here it is: Your feelings are valid, your pain is valid, and you are not alone.
1
MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 4
1/28/20 11:26 PM
2
MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 5
1/28/20 11:26 PM
3
“But he looks fine!” When we bump our knees, we quickly grab an ice pack to prevent bruising or swelling. When we break a bone, a cast and time will help it heal. When we find ourselves, or in my case, our loved ones, in a severe depression, there are no instant remedies. My husband spiraled into severe depression over the summer, hitting near rock bottom when suicidal thoughts were a daily occasion this past fall. He opened up to me and shared each time they happened. We tried a few strategies on our own, such as a nice long walk in the evening, or some well needed R&R on the weekends. But this was beyond the quick fixes, and we realized that it was not something we could overcome by ourselves, no matter how many different things we would try. One day he called me from work and just cried on the other end of the phone. I knew I had to get him and seek help immediately. Once I got to his work, his immediate supervisor told me that he looks fine. I replied quickly and stern: Yes, he does look fine indeed, but he is not okay. As I was processing the invisibility aspect of depression to the outside world, I drove my husband to the hospital, where he was admitted for three days under careful watch by medical professionals. One thing that I am thankful for myself is that I always took him seriously and never disregarded his feelings because I believe that our society has this very wrong expectation of our men never to show weakness or vulnerability. The thing I am most proud of him for is that he showed this socalled “weakness and vulnerability” by accepting help from others which in return showed his incredible strength. I confided in my professors, as I needed their support, and I was at a critical point in my studies. They referred me to a few vital resources, something that I am beyond grateful for. The first one is the on-campus counselor, who helped me to focus on my own needs while being a caregiver. The second one has been my ultimate strength throughout this, and it is the power of prayer. One of the verses that were shared with me comes from Proverbs 3: 5-6: “5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways know Him, and He will make your path straight.” So, I gave it all to God, and He continues to walk us through this. My husband is doing relatively well, and he has found some medications that have balanced things out, and he is almost back to work full-time with careful consideration. I know that this remains a work in progress, but nothing is more consoling than knowing that God is aware of our challenges and that He will direct our path.
MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 6
1/28/20 11:26 PM
“Though I am staggered, I am not undone.”
4 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 7
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Coping with Mental Health
Mental health includes emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects how we think, feel, and act. It also helps determine how we handle stress, interact and relate to others as well as make choices. Dealing with mental health can be a challenge but there are ways to manage it. A few things you can do to help cope with mental health is to tell yourself something positive. Try making this a daily habit, and pick different things you love about yourself and why. Exercise and eating good meals will help too. Exercise is shown to already release chemicals like endorphins and serotonin for example, that improve your mood. If you were to exercise regularly, it can reduce your stress and symptoms of mental health conditions. Make sure you have someone you can talk to.
Whether it’s a friend, family member, or a counselor. Talk about your problems, good things going on in your life. When we are alone or feeling alone that can only make our mental health worse. We need the closeness of human beings and just simply that one person to talk to. Last but not least I recommend meditation and breathing exercises. Every other morning, I have time to fit in my schedule a workout plan and time for meditation and stretching. This is very important for me because through the many stressors that life has brought upon me in these last couple of months, exercising and taking care of my body has kept me sane. Try these methods daily and your mental health
5 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 8
1/28/20 11:26 PM
6 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 9
1/28/20 11:26 PM
The Darkness As I continue to walk on this dark path I question how I could have ever gotten this far. At this point I don’t even remember where I started. Darkness snuck up behind me and engulfed the pain that I once felt. But it’s funny that I’ve danced with the darkness for so long that I long for its presence, I expect it to remain in my life. Because he’s so consistent, I get a glimpse of light, even a moment of the bright side and the darkness creeps back like a thief in the night. But is it safe? To fall in love with the thief in the night? He always comes back, when all else fails, he’s solid. What seems to be real never really is. I start to think it’s me, there’s gotta be something wrong with me because they’re plenty of good examples of what brightness and pure happiness appears to be but at this point I don’t know if it’s for me. I’m incapable of understanding the requirements of happiness. But the darkness always seems to hug me and comfort me, at first I’m mad that he returns but he always comes back, I leave him but he never leaves me.
I begin to think maybe I should stay faithful to the darkness. It’s not what everyone always desires to have but he’s all I got, he’s the only one who hasn’t left. There’s always someone better, someone who has the qualifications, someone who is obligated to take over my moment of happiness. Despite that I continue to pour out even an ounce of colour and light into others, I separate myself and continue to give, give and give. They take, take and take. And leave. It’s because they always tell me to never lose that love I have in my heart, the warmth that runs through my veins and flows from my soul. But does anyone even deserve that? Maybe I deserve that, and not for a second or a minute but forever. I deserve that... and then I realize I already have that. I don’t recognize it but I do, the higher power, who is known to be the creator of this universe. Something not even of this world that is often and simply forgotten but so important to remember.
7 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 10
1/28/20 11:26 PM
We turn from the one who loves us to try and find life. We hide behind masks to be the one. Yet time and time again we fall short. We are rejected and broken. Our hearts broken beyond repair, we believe that this will be the one. This is the one that will love us and fill the void we have. Yet at the end of the day they never can. The void can only be filled by the one we turned our back on, the one who waited patiently for us to turn around. The one that heard all our screams and pleas and saw all our tears. The one that cried as our heart broke in two. The one who will always love you for you. So turn back to him and find the love you lack. Let him heal your broken heart and dry your tears. Turn around into his open arms. His love awaits.
8 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 11
1/28/20 11:26 PM
“
1 Corinthians 15:33 People go through traumatic events in their life or things that they constantly deal with. These things will do one of two things to you, either it will make you stronger, or destroy you. In my case, it almost destroyed me before it made me stronger. Even when I recovered from these events, they bothered me so much that I didn’t even like talking about them with loved ones until recently. For that reason, I hid everything about myself from the people who cared about me most, and to this day none of my family members are aware of what happened to me throughout high school. I lost some close friends to gang violence. Friends that I grew up with who took dark paths later in their lives and ended up in jail or dead. I look back at that and I realized it could have been me. Despite the fact that these people were negative influences and I stopped interacting with them for my own good, they were still close friends. One of my friends from childhood died midway through 2017 by gun violence and it caused me to struggle with feelings of hopelessness and wonder why I’m even alive. A lot of the influences that I had around me were quite toxic. I started to distance myself from all of them and I did so by finding direction in my favourite bible verse. 1 Corinthians 15:33, “Be not deceived, bad company corrupts good morals.” Now do not get me wrong, I am not saying you need to cut everyone off that you clash with or disagree with from time to time, because then you will only succeed in alienating genuine people in your life. It is instead important to analyze the impact that people around you have on your life. Do they add to your life or do they take away? Do they make you happy or make you sad? Are they good influences or do you feel you run the risk of being in trouble or in danger every-time you are around them? These are the questions I had to ask myself when I surrounded myself with the people I did in high school. When I received negative answers for these questions, I knew what I had to do. I realized that I should not have to wonder if hanging around the friends that I had would be the ruin of me one day. This is why I tell you dear reader, do not let other people be stumbling blocks in your life because the moment you do that, is the moment you will fall with them. Do not stop caring for them in Christ and praying for them, but realize when they are stumbling blocks. Your friends and family should lift you up, not drag you down which is why I ask you to refer to 1 Corinthians 15:33.
9 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 12
1/28/20 11:26 PM
3
stantly make it ered until e who ware nds to their ould es lose by and e were finddeg, I am with nuine ople away? r do u are undve hould he eos the and nds u to
10 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 13
1/28/20 11:26 PM
How to Cope with my Mental Health 101 “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee” Isaiah 26:3. As I keep my mind focused on the Prince of Peace, that’s when my mind will be at its greatest peace. Through spiritual music, devotions, or prayer with the one whose love will never cease, I feel His peace, as my mind stays on the Prince of Peace. Over time I realized that I feel what I think, therefore positive Godly thought will raise me up, while negative burdensome thoughts will make me sink. Where my mind is, that is where my feelings tend to be, that is why I keep my mind stayed on He who forever loves me. If I am focused on troubles, I feel the sorrows my mind follows. However, if I focus on Godly hope, Godly joy and Godly peace and all the abundance of God made possibilities, I feel the joy that lifts me out of my daily worries and carries me to heavenly places where I desperately long to be. If I hold on to negative thoughts like Peter on the water, I will begin to sink, but like Peter, I will call on the name of the Lord because He will be the one to save me. Don’t just follow your mind, lead your mind to Jesus whose love for you will never fade. “His Peace He leaves with you, His peace He gives unto you: not as the world giveth, gives He unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid” John 14:27.
11 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 14
1/28/20 11:26 PM
“. . .we are never as alone as we make ourselves out to be in our heads.”
12 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 15
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Coping to Find Peace I spoke during WISE week on my struggle with suicide ideation, depression, and anxiety. I looked to Elijah in the bible and saw that he struggled with the same thing. I found it profound that the same God that Elijah requests death from is the same God that leads Elijah to find peace in living eternally. Of course there was a whole journey that took place before that event could happen. The way God dealt with Elijah in his dark moment is very intentional and, at first, may seem bizarre. When Elijah prays “I have had enough, LORD, Take my life;” (1 Kings 19:4) the first two things that the angel tells him to do is to eat and run. At first, it may sound random and out of place but this was a moment where God taught Elijah some coping skills. Whether it’s eating or staying active we all need to find coping mechanisms that will help us navigate our mental health at all levels. At one level I do well by surrounding myself with others as a way of coping. At another level, I can’t bear the sight of people and would much rather stay in my room. Knowing the difference in my mood, giving validation to it, and taking time to deal with it healthily, is the biggest gift I can give myself. Music, colouring, writing poems, talking, sleeping, are just some of the many ways I cope with my struggles. I have a long way to go and it sometimes feels like I’m hurting more than I’m healing but I am grateful for this journey no matter how dark it can get. I am blessed to have professional counsellors and understanding family and friends. I hold onto the fact that my heavenly Father comprehends my agony completely and has revealed those that care enough to empathize. God not only sits with me in my struggle but transforms me and will soon lead me to that never-ending life of eternal peace. If you are hurting and are struggling with your mental health please do not hesitate to look into getting professional help. Your coping skills are valuable but can also be joined by those that are equipped to help you. Plus it’s always nice to get guidance on how to continue your journey in a healthy way. AB Mental Health Helpline: 1-877-303-2642 Suicide Hotline: 1-833-456-4566 Peace Playlist all of these songs are Christian songs just because that’s the flow that I need during times when I am low. These are just some of the songs that have gotten me through rough times. Take It to the Lord in Prayer | Aeolians of Oakwood University Good Good Father Pray for me-Thokoza A Quiet Place (Hymn) Be Still My Soul (Hymn) Rescue-Darnel Brazil Oceans (cover)- Lynnea M. My Portion (Live)-Isla Vista Worship MIQEDEM - Adonai Ro’i Sync3 | Fiel a Mim - Resgatando Valores 13 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 16
1/28/20 11:26 PM
14 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 17
1/28/20 11:26 PM
When the editor for the Chronicle asked me to write something for this issue, I had to ask myself what the most useful topic to discuss is in the 250-500 words allotted to me. The conclusion that I arrived at was to provide the most straight forward, simplistic, and effective things that someone can do to improve their mental health with easy day to day practices. So let’s begin: Whenever I work with clients, I always ask about three foundational building blocks to health; Sleep, Diet, and Exercise. I don’t know about your experience, but it seems that growing up the classic mom template came with the catchphrase, “Drink more water, go for a walk, sleep 8 hours, and get some sunshine” as a fix-all solution for any woe. What’s funny, is that as dismissive and simplistic of a mindset as this is, there is actually a lot of truth in it; so let’s talk about it.
MENTAL HEALTH
Let’s talk about sleep first. What the research is showing us is that sleep has some major effects on our well being; for instance, people with insomnia are 10 times more likely to be diagnosed with clinical depression, and 17 times more likely to have clinical anxiety. There’s also been a direct link made between a lack of sleep and the onset of Alzheimer’s disease later in life. Bottom line, sleep is super important, and while it’s easy to sacrifice sleep while you’re in university, it’s important to make it a priority. Not only will it protect your mental health but sleep also helps with memory internalization which means you’ll remember what you’re studying better! Next comes exercise; now I don’t know about you, but I often struggle to get myself into the gym. Once again, however, what research is showing us is that exercise is such an important practice to improve mental health. Whenever you exercise, your body releases endorphins and serotonin which work to improve your mood. The most common type of antidepressant is an SSRI (Selective Serotonin Reuptake inhibitor), so even depression medication works to make your body experience the effects of serotonin; something released when you exercise. Also, exercise has huge physical health benefits, and even helps improve your memory so you perform better in school. Finally, while an ideal diet can sometimes be difficult on a café plan, research once again shows us that a healthy diet is essential to mental wellness. A few things you can try is to avoid diets with lots of processed sugars and fats; instead try to eat foods rich in natural sugars and fats. Doing something that simple can reduce the likelihood of depression by 25-35%!
15
There you have it, some easy steps to take care of your mental health and wellness that anyone can practice. Finally, I want to leave you by saying while these things will help, if you ever feel you need a little extra help, stop by the Sakala Success Centre. I’m here to help!
MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 18
1/28/20 11:26 PM
et is d try to 5-35%!
I want ccess 16 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 19
1/28/20 11:26 PM
17 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 20
1/28/20 11:26 PM
A Castle On A Hill When life seems like too much to handle, there is a place I like to visit. This place is a castle on a hill, purely of my own imagination. I can only get to this castle through the doorway of my mind. Though it may seem a little tedious, I frequently escape to my happy place, where the stresses of the world don’t seem so overbearing anymore. This mental tool is one I have developed over time on my own in an attempt at keeping my sanity during the bad times. At first I would imagine this place without thinking about it, and would fight to pull myself back to reality. It is peaceful in the meadows as I approach the castle where I find solace and tranquility in the ever-blooming nature. There is a little creek, clear and glistening that flows beside me on my journey. I can feel the prickly grass on my feet when I’m walking barefoot towards the castle, and it gives me the grounding I need when I can’t feel it in reality. The birds fly around, as if they don’t have a care in the world. How I wished I could fly free as them. I watch as they take flight from the branches they were perched at before letting out a melodious tune. The music they make calms me, as it is not a loud kind of sound, but a soft rhythm, one that a baby could sleep through. I see the castle becoming closer now, as the sun setting behind it creates the most beautiful silhouette. As I reach the smooth stone path leading towards the entrance of this castle, I begin to walk at a quicker pace, which shortly turns into a run and before I know it, I am sprinting to the castle. The workers outside of the castle welcome me with joy, and I smile back. As I approach the door, I realize how much larger it was than how it appeared previously. I had made it to the door of the castle in my daydreaming before, yet never once have I been able to muster the courage to knock.
Perhaps it’s the fear of getting too far away from reality, or maybe the fear that I won’t want to go back. Whatever the reason, my time escaping in this beautiful land is brought to an end, and I wake myself up from the trance I am in, before it comes time once again that I will visit my castle on a hill.
18 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 21
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Understanding Attempted Suicides
I cringe when I hear somebody say, “people who attempt or commit suicide are weak and selfish.” That hurts. Maybe you have said or thought this, and if I had not struggled with mental health, I might agree with you. But it’s not true, and although I am still struggling with the repercussions of my last suicide attempt, I can assure you we are some of the strongest people you will meet. I often get asked the question, “what went through your mind?” Therapists, doctors, friends and family all try to understand this question. All I can tell you is that I wanted to escape my mind and my life. I felt like my life was completely irrelevant. I was annoying and a burden to my friends and family because of my mental health and constant need of validation. Nobody really likes me and I am unimportant. Yes, I know that these thoughts are not true, but I feel that they are true. How often do you act on your feelings? We all do it a lot. Heart takes over the mind. Depression is crippling. It sucks everything out of you and leaves you with complete exhaustion. It destroys relationships you want to keep, your health, jobs, schoolwork. Everything. So here I am on the kitchen floor with a bottle of pills in my lap. There’s a knife in the living room that couldn’t numb me this time. Drugs and alcohol can’t fix all of my problems either and have terrible long-term effects. I do not have the coping skills that I need to get out of this. And so, I keep taking handfuls of pills until a friend calls me and realizes I am not okay and I am rushed to the hospital. Obviously, I am still alive, but I am still haunted by it. Just because I survived does not make it any easier. Suicidal thoughts are the worst thing I have faced in my life. I did not ask for it and I really don’t want to want to die. If you are hurt because a loved one has attempted or committed suicide, here is what I want you to know: we still love you. We just do not feel like we are loved, and this is not your fault. Our minds are wired to destroy every good thought sometimes, in a way that you may not understand. I was not trying to be selfish or weak when I wanted to kill myself. I could not think rationally to begin with. I have to work way harder to have a better life than a person who does not struggle with mental illness does, and this is constantly exhausting. I am working on my coping skills and there are some things that have helped me. Increase in medication is one thing that has helped keep the suicidal thoughts under control. I also now keep a thought journal. You can google CBT thought journal templates, and I promise you that it helps a lot. I also use CBD oil, which is completely natural and no, is not a drug. I find that it helps keep me calm and helps regulate my mood, along with many other health benefits. Sometimes going to church is difficult for me, so I like to listen to podcasts while doing something I enjoy. I highly recommend Mark Clark’s sermons. You can find them on the Apple Podcast app. There is light after a suicide attempt, and my prayer is that you can find it too.
19 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 22
1/28/20 11:26 PM
20 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 23
1/28/20 11:26 PM
First things first, what helps me may not help everyone else. That’s just something that I want to make quite clear. Also, another reminder is that everyone has mental health. Many times, when we discuss ways to help people with their mental health we focus on those who have a mental illness. Everyone who breathes has mental health! Don’t forget that. Don’t forget to take care of your mental health. Anyways here are some things that I personally do that help me with my mental health: Going on walks This is my favorite thing to do. I will go on a walk to clear my head or just take a time out from everything. Being surrounded by fresh air is always a good thing. I prefer to have earphones and music playing but if you prefer the sound of nature feel free. Listening to music I don’t know if anyone here has watched Grey’s Anatomy but if you have you’ll get this: Meredith and Cristina where they would just dance it out. I used to think they looked weird but honestly, I tried it and it’s the greatest thing. Just some time with yourself dancing and looking however crazy you wish to look. Therapy I personally love therapy. Going helps me vocalize things that many of my friends do not seem to understand. As great as a “therapist” your friend may be, they don’t got that degree. And if they’re studying psychology or behavioural science they still don’t got that degree yet. Journaling Other than talking to my therapist I suck at vocalizing how I feel. I am much better at writing, therefore I keep a journal where I write. Sometimes I will sit and things just flow. I have a journal like the paper journal and I also have a file on my google docs that I also use, that way I can write whenever and wherever I am. Taking a time out Sometimes you literally need to just pause. I don’t know if you need to schedule your lazy time but give yourself time to just breathe and try your hardest to forget about stress. You can do this by watching Netflix, going on YouTube, hanging out with friends, or just reading a book. You got to do whatever works best for you. Finding what works for you is like trial and error. For me all these things work but for someone else, none of these things could work. You got to find your perfect fit. To those who have found their perfect fit congrats to you! And for those who are still looking don’t give up you’ll find it eventually, trial and error my friend, trial and error.
21 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 24
1/28/20 11:26 PM
22 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 25
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Without a Vision the People Perish (Solomon Davidson, 993 BC) The Chronicle requested individuals to write articles to populate their mental-health issue. As a psychologist it seemed my responsibility to respond. As a preamble, you don’t solve depression by exploring depression, you don’t reduce stress by studying anxiety-producing situations, you don’t create positive relationships by exploring problems a couple is experiencing. The answers come from an individual who published several times in the most prestigious journal of all time (the Bible) and uttered some of the most brilliant statements ever spoken by a human. Let’s start with our title. Solomon stated “without a vision the people perish.” Health starts with a razor sharp, positive vision of what is healthy. Paul backed this up a thousand years later as he describes the road to vibrant health: “Keeping your eyes fixed on Jesus, the author and perfector of your faith.” Where do you want to go? Who do you want to be? What characteristics do you want to exhibit? What impact do you want to make on your world? If you live your life like the muck-raker in Pilgrim’s Progress, you become an expert in the horrors of life, but why would anyone want to do that? Let’s try answering the four questions: Where do I want to go? I want to go to Lacombe Alberta and teach and research at Burman University. What do I want to be? I want to be someone who inspires others to transcend present circumstances and live a magnificent life that touches many for good. What characteristics do I want to exhibit? I want others to see in me joy, purpose, wisdom, humor, direction, transcendence, beauty through music, vibrant life. What impact do I want to make on my world? Before I die I want to reduce the divorce rate by 1%, help faculty at Burman publish 100 times in the next 10 years, help innumerable students have higher esteem, be better parents, and enjoy extraordinary relationships. Now, that is enough to keep one engaged for a lifetime! Don’t you feel better just reading that paragraph? Then follow Jesus’ instructions: “Go and do thou likewise.” Answer these questions for yourself and create your own vision that will keep you inspired for a lifetime. The second of the two Solomon statements is equally vivid: “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” Not thinketh in his head, but thinketh in his heart. The heart represents a more all-encompassing involvement. I modern parlance, we might say: we become what we immerse ourselves in. There are three basic sources of this “immersion”: 1) Input: what we read, watch, listen to, study; 2) our choice of environment: the people we hang out with and associate with; and 3) our choice of actions: the activities we choose to do.
23 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 26
1/28/20 11:26 PM
If I want a rich spiritual life I will (1) read spiritually uplifting material, watch videos that enhance my spirituality, listen to spiritually uplifting music, study the spiritual giants of the past. I will (2) associate with people who have rich spiritual lives, and (3) I will safeguard devotional time and attend meetings that help me grow spiritually. If I want to be wealthy I will (1) read books about wealth acquisition, watch videos by the masters, listen to Napoleon Hill and Robert Kiasaki CDs, study different methods of achieving financial abundance. I will (2) associate with those who have similar values and want to achieve similar goals, and (3) today I will apply wealth principles in my own finances and continue to do so. Dude #1, is going to have a fabulous level of spirituality. Dude #2 is going to be fabulously wealthy. If someone does both, he or she will be wealthy and spiritual. Multiply that a thousand times over for a thousand different images that people may hold: A great athlete, doctor, musician, artist, teacher, banker, bus driver, a construction worker. And in so doing you combine Solomon’s two master statements: You create a vision and you immerse yourself in an environment that will ensure that vision.
24 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 27
1/28/20 11:26 PM
Often when it comes to mental illness and recovery, people like to talk about the success stories. For a long time I thought, I don’t have a success story. But I do. We all do. In my head I defined success as a complete recovery from my mental illnesses; I defined it as being happy all the time. But I’ve decided to redefine what success means to me. Success for me is being able to be honest and open about my feelings. A few years ago I wouldn’t have been caught dead opening up to or crying in front of my friends. Now I’m able to be honest with how I feel, and I’m not afraid to be vulnerable with the people that I care about. Success for me is setting firm boundaries. I’ve had a tendency to let people walk all over me, because I wanted to make sure that they were happy and that their feelings didn’t get hurt. Now I am able to express my needs and set boundaries. It’s not easy and sometimes it can cause some friction in relationships, but it has really improved my state of mind. Success for me is going to therapy regularly. I never knew how to go about getting a therapist, sometimes I thought my problems weren’t serious enough. Now I go to therapy 1-2 times a month and it has helped me more than I ever expected it would. It’s not a quick fix but if you stick with it, it can do wonders. Success for me is taking my medication. Once I was able to open up to friends and family, they helped me go through the process of getting a diagnosis. With that diagnosis, I was able to start on a medication and when I take it I am able to focus much better, which then reduces my anxiety and helps me to be more productive. Redefine success in your own journey to recovery. Every day that you get an assignment done is a success. Every day that you have something to eat is a success. Every day that you get out of bed is a success. Every day that you continue to live is a success.
SUCCESS STORIES
25 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 28
1/28/20 11:26 PM
There are many misconceptions about mental illness, especially in religious communities. People have a tendency to believe that if you ignore your negative thoughts and focus on God, or if you pray, sing, and do daily devotions it’ll all get better. This line of thinking implies that your mental illness will disappear if you just pray enough, or if you just believe. Frankly, that’s just not how it works. God is not a get out of jail free card for all of life’s problems. There are so many factors that go into why people have mental illness and many factors in how to cope and recover. Reasons for mental illness include but are not limited to genetic factors, brain injury, physical/emotional/psychological trauma, amount and duration of stress a person is under, and work/school/home environments. Symptoms can range from loss of motivation and energy, to extreme mood swings, to overwhelming obsessions or fears. Safe to say it’s more complicated than just “having negative thoughts.” For those who believe in God, I know what you may be thinking, “but God says He’ll help us through our trials, that He won’t let us go through things we can’t handle.” Here’s my answer to that: There’s a story about a man who was stuck out in the ocean. He couldn’t swim back to shore; he was starting to drown. Then a boat came up to him. “Let us help you,” the sailors said. “No,” said the man, “God will save me.” The boat moves on and a while later another boat shows up. “Let us help you,” the sailors said. “No,” said the man, “God will save me.” Unsurprisingly, the man drowns and dies. When he gets to heaven he meets God. “God, I was drowning,” he said. “Why didn’t you save me?” “I sent you two boats,” God answers. What I’m trying to say with all this is that praying, singing hymns, and waiting around for God to fix everything is not a solution. Prayer, singing, and devotions can absolutely be part of your recovery process if you think it benefits you, but there are so many other things that go into recovery. You should be considering how your sleep, diet, and exercise habits are affecting you. You should consider things like therapy and medication. All these things are like the boats God sent the man in the story. Take the boats when they come. As someone who lives with anxiety and depression, as someone who tried at first to just pray it away, I can tell you it’s not enough. Accept help, go to therapy, talk to your doctor about medication. There’s nothing wrong with turning to a higher power for help, but make sure you get help from other sources too.
26 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 29
1/28/20 11:26 PM
A woman, in a garden Alone Her love was away
Lonely
A snake in the garden, lurking It spoke to the woman, Sweet nothings, pleasing lies About a fruit, she was not supposed to touch This woman Listening to the snake Thirsting for attention Pushing The spirit away Thinking “this fruit is the solution.” Stretching her arm Reaching for what could possibly Be her escape But in vain, Biting into the fruit She caused herself to Be removed from her first true love And found herself in the most lonely place The Spirit Left her and for once she felt it. Loneliness. A man in his garden Alone, Away from the crowd Him? Never was he alone But he sought to be. Loneliness could’ve been his weakness. But in it he found strength There, he could be filled with the Spirit. In a garden, she fell And in a garden he knew what to do to save her. The man Thirsting for a way to bring them back together Listening to his spirit Pushing the doubts away Thinking I am the solution Stretching his arms to become the one that could finally Destroy her loneliness Made the sacrifice 27 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 30
Separated from the spirit He was vulnerable In his most lonely state The snake thought it had won But it didn’t understand that The man saved her from her loneliness. Not by fruit but by himself He lifted the loneliness clouding her mind Until she saw him, saw love Her one true love He then left her, Back to his kingdom But the Spirit returned to her. By his action, One day She would escape her most lonely place on earth To the most holy place in His kingdom And a new garden will be their final destination, Their happy ending I was lonely Thirsting for some boy’s attention Listening to my snakes, my “friends.” Pushing my self-worth away Thinking; this outfit is the solution! Stretching my arms to reach for anything that could possibly End my loneliness Satan made me think I was alone, And that I would forever be He tricked me to grab his lie so that I would stay sad in my loneliness for eternity But Jesus tore that lie right in front of me Now, I can go to a lonely place, To be revived in the Spirit What used to be the state of my sadness became the used by Him state of my joy I am no longer a servant of loneliness but I am a friend of Jesus I was born to be alone But through Jesus’ sacrifice, I was reunited with God, my first love And never will I feel lonely Again 1/28/20 11:26 PM
bly
Mental health Be Mindful Be mindful where your mind is at all times, Be mindful because your mind is very delicate, Lead your mind to hopeful places, You are the one in control of it. An attitude of Gratitude can go a very long way. Keep your mind on the right path and don’t let it go astray. Be mindful where your mind is at all times, Be mindful because your mind is very delicate, Lead your mind to Jesus, He will help you to control it. Where is your mind right now? Don’t let it wander off. Where is your mind right now? Train it to follow positive heavenly thoughts. Be mindful where your mind is at all times, Be mindful because your mind is very delicate, Lead your mind to hopeful places, You are the one in control of it. You are what you eat, so let your mind chew on positive heavenly thoughts. You are what you think, so think of yourself as a victorious child of God. Be mindful where your mind is at all times, Be mindful because your mind is very delicate, Lead your mind to Jesus, He will help you to control it. Choose your thoughts, choose to be hopeful, choose gratitude, choose to be grateful. Fill your mind with Jesus, His hope will never cease, fill your mind with Jesus, and your joy every day will increase. By: Shaun Young
28 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 31
1/28/20 11:26 PM
want to write for the Chronicle? Email us at SACHRONICLE@BURMANU.CA 29 26 MENTAL HEALTH PT 2 FINAL.indd 32
1/28/20 11:26 PM