The Chap Issue 111

Page 12

Arbuthnot

Splendid Isolation Diary After testing positive for coronavirus, Torquil Arbuthnot was advised by his physician to remain indoors for a week. This is his journal for those seven days.

Sunday

“The Pope suggests that, when I’m feeling better, I should pop over to Rome sometime for an asado, as he makes a mean salsa criolla. He has had a billiards table installed in the Castel Gandolfo, so we can chat over the baize”

I am obliged to take some sort of medicoscientifical test before venturing out, to ensure that I don’t contaminate the general populace. I stick what resembles a swizzle stick up my nose and ask my man Youssef to do the necessary with the chemicals. He informs I have tested “positive” and must self-isolate for several days. I admit I had been feeling rather seedy, but mistook the symptoms for my usual panoply of ailments: gout, Green Monkey

12


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.