SEND PHOTOS OF YOURSELF AND OTHER BUDDING CHAPS AND CHAPETTES TO CHAP@THECHAP.CO.UK FOR INCLUSION IN THE NEXT ISSUE
“You will note,” writes Peter J Faye, “that my mode of transport is an electrically assisted vélocipède, as I demonstrate that one does not need to be some long haired, baggy jumper-wearing oik to do one’s bit towards preserving our plague ridden planet.” Sir, we did not note the electrification of your ladies’ bicycle until you drew attention to it, for we were too distracted by the absence of bicycle clips to restrain your flared trousers from catching in the chain. Though presumably there is, instead of a chain, some form of electrical chip that powers said velocipede. Also, sir, you have a puncture to the rear of the ‘vehicle’.
The man seated behind Ian Taylor expressed our own concerns about various matters, namely an uncertain shirt collar, non-contrasting pocket square, excess jacket cuff, pointless covered buttons and slanted pockets on a non-hacking jacket. But the seated man’s loudest groan must have been at Mr. Taylor’s flagrant ignorance of the ‘always, sometimes, never’ jacket buttoning rule.
