Acknowledgement ofCountry
The team behind The Hilarian would like to acknowledge that the land the Adelaide University Law School is on is the traditional land of Kaurna people, and that we respect their spiritual relationship with their Country and we respect and value their past, present and ongoing connection to the land and cultural beliefs.
EDITORS WELCOME
We had written an entire bit about how the US election season is a dumpster fire and how our heads and (singular) ears were in the sand, for it was all too depressing to watch. Alas! The landscape has changed significantly since then, and we’re keen to see how the ‘Kamala is Brat’ campaign will unfold over the following months. Maybe the real coconut tree was the friends we made along the way....
So, here we are again Semester 2 Issue 2! What a first half of the year we’ve had Let it be known that we are 2/3 issues away from our three-peat of releases in 2024. We’re sure the patrons of Ligertwood aren’t used to this level of content, but we’re more than happy to provide.
As we float into Semester 2, the three of us have decided to make some mid-year resolutions. We’re all about accountability here at the Hilarian, so if you see or hear of us slacking off, be sure to call us out as we trudge through the Ligertwood.
TheHilarianEditors’Mid-YearResolutions:
· Have all three of us in the same place at the same time
· Try to mention The Merger as little as possible
· No streaming of showtunes to ensure a super cool and trendy Spotify wrapped
· Do all readings
· Make sure every Hilarian reader buys a ticket to Law Revue (shameless plug)
We are also pleased that Isab has safely returned from her study abroad! She has successfully passed all of her subjects (thank goodness for NGP) and her wanky British accent has well and truly worn off. However, it is now time for us to say “auf wiedersehen!” to another of our trio as Chris jets off to Mannheim, Germany to begin her exchange adventure. As our new foreign correspondent, we are expecting stories of steins, lederhosen, and bratwurst aplenty upon her return We have major Euro Summer envy but wish her all the best on her travels!
Without further ado, enjoy the second issue! Our erudite subcommittee (not AI) have produced some deliciously moreish articles for your eyes to feast upon. For more content, feel free to follow us on Insta @thehilarian for Josh’s quality memes
Stay groovy!
Chris, Josh, and Isab
xo
rollcredits
EDITORS
CHRIS JOHNSON
ISABELLA MOORE
JOSH WILSON
SUBCOMMITTEE
BELLAROSE WATTS
EKATERINI KOUNTOUROGIANNIS
HARRY EDMONDS
HOLLY BOSWELL
ISABELLA PENNA
JENNIFER LAMB
KUSH GOYAL
NETRA RAMKUMAR
ROSANA MARSHALL
SAMARA DIXON
CONTRIBUTIONS
ASIRAH ABDUL KADIR
MICHAIL IVANOV
ZOE TAMATA TTPD GAME ANSWERS
ehT retloB - luaP lacseM
ehT tsellamS naM ohW revE deviL - lenoiL isseM reteP - namredipS
I naC oD tI htiW a nekorB traeH - sureveS epanS
tuB yddaD I evoL miH - treboR niwrI
I kooL ni s’elpoeP swodniW - eoJ grebdloG
ehT kcalB goD - suiriS kcalB
ytliuG sa ?niS - ecurB nnamrheL
hserF tuO eht remmalS - yspyG esoR drahcnalB
ehT derutroT steoP tpeD - lieN yrreP
Dear Editors,
When we merge with UniSA, will the Hilarian still exist? Or will some super-magazine be formed and you’ll be forced to integrate with the editors of an equivalent publication from the other uni? Please! Any indication will set my worries at ease. Kind regards, Stressed and confused
Dear Stressed,
We are sorry to hear these questions have been plaguing your conscience. Unfortunately, this letter has only just got us thinking about it now So, thanks for the anxiety We have no answer for you We fear this merger will be an ‘every editor for themselves’ scenario and no one is safe
TTO O LETTERS LETTERS
EDITORS EDITORS
TTHE HE
Dear Editors,
Every time an all law students email is sent out, I find it is my personal duty to reply to the sender. They surely want to know my thoughts on any given matter. I think the best option is to ‘reply all’, so my peers can find out my name, student number, and how far I’m willing to go for a research assistant position. How do I stop this overwhelming and uncontrollable urge?
Love, Outlook Aficionado
Dear Aficionado,
You are the bane of our existence. However, that doesn’t mean you should control these urges. By all means, please continue to ‘reply all’ to every email. That way we will never run out of Instagram content.
HILARIAN HEADLINES
ORTC LOGO CONTINUES TO GROW IN SIZE: takes four people to spell out
MOVE ON! MATE STILL BITTER ABOUT EXAM: “One more 74 and I’ll lose my sh*t”
READING CAREERS GUIDE WILL NOT INCREASE CHANCES OF GETTING A “CLERSKHIP”
1ST YEAR GRAPHIC DESIGN STUDENT SET FOR LIFE: designs new Adelaide Uni logo in MS Paint for $9 million
Get all that universi-tea
THE THE STUDENT STUDENT
AGONYKUSH AGONYKUSH AGONYKUSH AGONYKUSH AGONYKUSH
Kush, I’ve been talking to an engineering boy and I think he’s about to ask me out. Should I say yes?
Resident advice-giver Kush Goyal is back to solve your law school woes, relationship qualms and many more He claims to be ‘the best in the business’, so by all means, read it and weep Remember! We can’t be held responsible for this advice. This is Kush’s burden to hold, we fear Do with that information what you will.*
Hi Kush, I have an offer to work at a top-tier corporate firm, but I’m worried about betraying my ethical code. What should I do?
Wow. First off, colour me surprised that an engineering student (especially a male one) actually talked to you Forgive my assumption, but you must look suspiciously very much like an anime character From my experience, engineering students are either:
a) Boisterous, loud, arrogant, low-functioning alcoholics (more so than law students, believe it or not); or
b) Quiet, timid, awkward, a little bit boring
I’d argue that you’re screwed either way. Prepare to want to smash your head into a wall whilst hearing them talk about weird maths and physics nerdy shit and to have them complain about how dreadfully difficult their four-hour pracs are whilst you brave an Admin Law lecture (they actually stood around the lab for two of those hours waiting for their experiment to work). Then, prepared to be belittled for having open book exams and for knowing how to write a paragraph that doesn’t sound like it was written by a Neanderthal. Engineering students are good for one thing and one thing only: beers [1]
However, I qualify this by saying that anything is better than dating another law student, so go for it.
[1] For legal purposes, this is a joke. I’m not degreeist, I promise I have engineering friends
Ethical code? What are we, philosophers? You’re about to join a profession that is hated world-over for lying and cheating We profit when people lose Think of lawyers as sex workers in service to a pimp (the client) The client tells the lawyer who to screw, and the lawyer screws them Who do you think will be amongst those who benefit the most out of a recession that may or may not be coming to this country? Lawyers. We chase those dollar signs like a meth addict chases their next fix. Don’t worry about betraying your ethical code. When you’re bringing home enough money to take your family skiing once a year, you can, like, donate a couple bucks to charity or something.
Agony Kush, my tutor told me that I should be grateful for sexism. What should I do?
Hi Kush! As a first year, where are the best places to study in the law school?
Oh. As a straight man, I do not feel qualified to answer this question That’s pretty cooked Let me consult my vast collection of feminist literature and get back to you (I’m 6'2" and drive a Ferrari btw).
The law library is a popular place to study! The combination of asbestos, musty books, that dull colour palette, and handsome Bulgarian Librarians should, in theory, make the library extremely conducive to getting stuff done. However, despite the abundance of ‘quiet zone’ signs, the law library is very rarely, if ever, actually quiet Notoriously, the downstairs portion of the library (‘the dungeon’) is infamous for inflicting on students the inability to successfully do any work. You’ll hear first years freak out as they try to understand Boilermakers; third years weep trying to keep up with two Corporate Law lectures every week, and you’ll see the hollow, empty shells of final years still recovering from DRE. But, in all honesty, success at law school is more concerned with who you meet than what you learn I’m paraphrasing Sun Tzu’s The Art of War when I say ‘go to the dungeon, socialise, and hope you end up with a grad role’. Just don’t socialise with me If you see me, turn around and walk the other damn way
Hi Kush, long time reader, second time asker. As the most handsome/desirable man in the law school, how do you balance everyone’s expectations?
Wow, thanks for this high praise, totally anonymous question asker! Heavy is the head that wears the crown. In all honesty, I really think that humility is the key.
Got a question for Kush? Scan the QR code below to submit for the next issue!
su n seiracsyad su n seiracsyad
By Eka
By Eka
t e r i n i
t e r i n i
sinnaigoruotnuoK
sinnaigoruotnuoK
It’s the start of Semester 2. Law Ball is a sad, distant memory (mimosas, if you ’ re reading this, I miss you). There’s nothing to look forward to. First semester feels like a bad hangover.
Join Ekaterini Kountourogiannis in wallowing in all the misery and regret the first 6 months of the year brought about - the final grades haven’t been published if you never look at them.
its been a long day –spacey jane
hard times – ethel cain
motion sickness – phoebe bridgers
the bottom – gracie abrams
don’t think I can do this again – clairo and mura masa
not strong enough –boygenius
weiveR Revue
By Michail ivanov
Last year’s Taylor Swift themed Law Revue was truly Fearless With the looming threat of being cancelled, the revue crew chose to Speak Now and paint the town Red with their absurd and exciting sketches. From the slow burn of a homoerotic scene in the Saints gym, to the quick pace of a spelling bee, the revue had it all.
President Lau’s regime was controversially satirised, with Lau, played by the erudite Alice McKay, being dethroned Like the Soviet Union fell in 1989, so too may the AULSS(R), if the revue is anything to go by. President Lau and the rest of the AULSS have yet to publicly comment on their depiction in the revue. Perhaps less so a skit and more so a recount of the cast’s love lives, audience members pieced together the puzzle in a skit where a law student reveals she is dating a fascist dictator.
By all means, this year’s revue held up to its Reputation. I, like most audience members I spoke to, was a true Lover of Between Two Pot Plants – a fru-choc-full parody of Between Two Ferns with guest appearances by law school royalty Dr Mark Giancaspro and Dr Peta Spyrou.
Of note is the show’s truly diverse cast, with strong Hilarian representation by the three current Hilarian editors, Isabella, Chris and Josh, as well as past editor and controversial figure, the infamous Kush To pull off a show so good may have seemed like Folklore, but director Esther Wong could do no wrong
May the revue live for Evermore! All the Midnights the revue crew spent writing and rehearsing for the show were well worth it.
I give last year’s law revue 12 Grammys out of 12.
Like the sound of that? Keep your eyes peeled for promo aplenty and ticket purchase links for this year’s Adelaide Law Revue!!
Led by wunderkind Samoda Silva, be prepared for another year of hilarity, insanity, and profanity. But for now, its back to the writers room for us...
Top5placestoprint yourexamnotes
By Isabella Moore
Ah, the semester-ly adage of collating an entire subject’s worth of highly formatted, colour coded, Times New Roman-ed exam notes, ready to get you through a three hour handwritten slog at Wayville. This process is equal parts satisfying and ghastly, as you realise a) how little you know about the subject, and b) how many pages of notes you’ve made, to ensure at least a C on your upcoming exam. The next fear is imminent: how on EARTH are you going to print these notes in a way that doesn’t break the bank nor the environment simultaneously? I’ve rounded up the top 5 places where you can print your glorious exam notes around the humble Adelaide CBD. Let me hear a “thank you Isab” …. You’re welcome! So polite!
At uni
First off, are you CRAZY? NO ONE would recommend this But in the name of entertainment, here’s a singular reason why you should consider printing your notes at uni Convenience is what makes this option appear on the list, for there is nothing simpler than grinding away on the Law Library monitors and the printers are just a hop, skip, and a followyou away! But, as I am a kind person, I DO NOT endorse this. The uni has enough of your money. Please find a better solution. Luckily, I have four more…
Your workplace
Okay, it seems like this list is actually fraught with danger and doesn’t really comprise of any decent places to print your notes. I promise, the good stuff is coming. Patience is a virtue. Goddamn law students. Anyway. Printing your notes at your work (assuming you work in a firm or some sort of office scenario) seems like an easy fix. However, if you’re an anxious lil girlie like myself, the thought of anyone questioning WHY you’re printing 40+ pages of double sided notes that could maybe pass as ‘research’ but really just looks like ‘property law for dummies’ is enough to deter you from trying this method. If your work is chill, give this a go. If you or your workplace are less chill, probs not the best option for you.
Your home
If you’re a sweat god stationery nerd that has a colour printer in your home in the year of 2024, you don’t deserve this list. Skip this article completely and buy a scanner or a 3D printer or a Tesla or some sh*t. Freak.
Officeworks
Visit your local store (PS: its Gawler Place if you’re in the CBD) and bother the poor geezer at the print and copy counter by requesting that your notes are handled with the utmost care and diligence as they serve their 1000th university student of the day, any given day in May or October. If you know someone that works there, you just might cop a cheeky discount. Regardless, you can leave the store knowing you’ve levelled up your exam note game, as they are now sexily printed, bound, and ready to rock the Goyder Pavilion’s proverbial socks off
Your parents workplace
I’m sorry. This is the most nepobaby I’m gonna get. But if your mummy or your daddy happens to work in an office, and no one happens to care nor question how they utilise their workplace printers, your best bet is to flick them your notes in an email, use a copious amount of x’s and o’s, promise to do the dishes, and skip the printing fees completely. Works for me every time! This tip is especially useful if your dad’s and your workplace are one and the same. This is something I’m sure many of our readership can relate to
Well, there you have it! This exam season, refer to my handy guide for a smooth sailing experience that will make all those hours of ‘studying’ (copying the lecture slides into your own format and font) worthwhile Happy printing!
Interviewwitha UniSAStudent
Have you heard about The Merger? Of course you have! Soon, two universities will become one, but the question is who are these UniSA students anyway? Jennifer Lamb has made the long and treacherous journey down North Terrace to get the inside scoop just for you, dear reader Here is EVERYTHING you need to know
What are you studying?
...and why would you do that?
Law and accounting at UniSA.
Well, every ex of mine has said that I’m a “serial gaslighter” and I can count to 20 (if I use my fingers) so it seemed like the obvious choice
Right…so sources tell me that you had a brief stint at Adelaide Uni? What’s the tea there?
Where did you hear that??!!! I don’t like to publicly speak about this, but it was a really dark time in my life. I lasted a semester. You guys are so stuck in the 1800s with your in-person classes and attendance hurdle requirements. Me? I like to learn from the comfort of my bed, so I moved.
You’re not going to print that right…right??? I’d lose all of my UniSA street cred if they found out I went there...
What do you think is the biggest difference between Adelaide Uni and UniSA law students?
You and I both know that law students are the same everywhere you go. Though I do feel that at Adelaide they are more utterly unbearable. I could go a lifetime without seeing another pair of RM’s and I’d be happier.
Is it safe to assume that you do not own a pair of RMs?
No I bought them during those 6 months at Adelaide because I thought I’d be cool I was wrong
How do you feel about us all becoming one big happy Adelaide University family and rendering your change obsolete?
In all seriousness, I’m not a fan. I’m all for the Uni getting a major facelift (sorry but Ligertwood desperately needs it) but tbh I’m very glad I graduate this year and won’t be around for it. It’s like their playing The Bachelor with uni courses –only god knows what makes it off the cutting room floor. The possibility of one happy family coming together to sh*t on Flinders is the silver lining.
Give me a review of the UniSA Law Ball in three words please?
“Not that bad”
I was hoping for something a little more descriptive, do you want to try again?
No
Rank the UniSA Magill, Adelaide North Terrace, UniSA East and UniSA West campuses from least to most asbestos
Purely based on vibes and no scientific criteria at all I’d say: Most asbestos
Adelaide North Terrace
Nearly most asbestos
UniSA Magill
Mostly not asbestos
UniSA East
Least asbestos
UniSA West
Any other comments?
Can you let me go now?
Internal Considerationsfor BigPurchases
(TrademarkPending)
DO YOU WANT AN $8 LATTE?
Ahhh, the cost of living crisis. It has plagued us all. Prices of regular, everyday luxuries are getting greater and greater. What was once $4 is now $8.... much like the humble latte, as Belle Watts has discovered. If you, like Belle, are tossing up the pros and cons of breaking the bank for a bit of caffeine, use this handy flowchart to decide whether the financial detriment is worth the brief productivity boost. N o
Why are you even here?
Yes
Do you have $8 - $56 spare to spend daily - weekly on a latte?
Yes In this cost of living crisisgo you!!
Did you cancel your gym membership and start running instead?
Have you started bringing a packed lunch to work instead of buying it?
No Yes Yes No No No No Yes wh y thank you
Have you deleted your ‘euro summer’ mood board Yes
Have you stopped buying daily “sweet little treats”?
BUY THAT LATTE!!!
That was hard, you deserve a reward
Have you stopped bringing a packed lunch to work and started eating your coworkers instead? No No No No p hew, t hankgoodness Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes
Have you obtained an invisibility cloak to sneak onto Adelaide Metro without tapping your card?
Have you made it through this whole flowchart?
Do your parents own property you could secretly remortgage?
Do you have a friend with a trust fund who could buy it for you instead?
THE THE PROCRASTINATOR PROCRASTINATOR
Relax, stay a while, your seminar starts at 10 past the hour anyway
Cancelled
The internet’s sentencing regime.
Social media is often said to be a ruthless place. It’s a virtual Wild West, if you will, with its never-ending fights, tensions, and scandals. Except there are no chaps or salon brawls here, only Twitter beef and influencers doing and saying questionable things. Still, that doesn’t make it any less chaotic.
But unlike the Wild West, the social media world actually has some form of mechanism to regulate these abhorrent behaviours – not laws, not codes, but an unwritten sentencing regime known as cancel culture.
If you were on Twitter, Instagram, or Youtube when cancel culture was rife, you would know what I mean. The sentence came in various forms and almost always simultaneously: verbal floggings dressed as snide comments, memes, and hashtags followed by doxxings and eventually, virtual exile, with the punished deactivating their social media accounts and succumbing to a life without internet fame.
If I were to describe what it was like to witness these reckonings as a third party (not as the punisher, nor the punished), I would say it was like watching the beheading of an overthrown elite as an 18th century peasant. Very dramatic, very public.
By Asirah Abdul Kadir
I’ve seen a number of people walk the cancel culture plank, from beauty gurus to Hollywood celebrities. Most are deserving of it but some probably not- and that’s the problem with this regime: it lacks structure. There are no courts and appointed judges, no rules and etiquettes, and certainly no guidelines. Virtually anyone can partake in the sentencing, and anything can be adduced as evidence no matter how remote or irrelevant it is to the current matter. The hearsay rule is simply non-existent.
And because you are judged subjectively, you are at the mercy of the internet. If they didn’t think it was that big of a deal, you’ll likely be spared. If they’ve gotten bored of you, you’ll likely be spared. If they’ve found someone else to hound, you’ll likely be spared. It depends on the masses, but also on the severity of your conduct.
But even then, there will always be someone who’s ready to pardon, ready to defend even the worse of offenders. There is no unanimity over the internet, after all. That is the one thing it shares with the real world.
So, with the absence of order, can we even call it a regime? And if we could, is it even an effective one if the truly problematic remains blasé to the wrath of cancel culture?
Film Review: Monkey Man
By Rosana marshall
Monkey Man, Dev Patel's gritty and bold directorial debut, follows Kid, a solemn young man inspired by the Hindu God Hanuman with a thirst for violence, through a journey of selfdiscovery and vengeance.
The film takes place in the underbelly of a fictional Indian city, Yatana, once a forest village but now in the hands of oppressive politicians and law enforcement. Kid, depicted by Patel, gets beaten relentlessly while fighting in underground brawls, earning a living for every fight he loses. Kid is motivated to avenge his mother's death, orchestrated by Baba Shakti (Makarand Deshpande) an oppressive religious and political figure, and Rana (Sikander Kher) the policeman who raped and
destruction of their village. Through his journey of vengeance, the violence and fight scenes are never-ending, as well as reoccurring themes of devotion to not only his mother, but his cause and faith
Dev Patel’s visual debut is absolutely stunning, to say the least. Patel’s use of vivid colouring and violence lends itself to a captivating performance, which had my eyes glued to the screen. The saturation throughout the film communicates the frantic aura of the film effectively, almost to a stressful level.
What distinguishes Monkey Man is its study of issues ranging from Hindu mythology to contemporary prejudice in Indian society. Drawing inspiration from the legend of Hanuman, Kid’s pursuit of vengeance embodies the
credit: UNIVERSAL PICTURES
deity's devotion and strength. Patel takes this legend and transforms it into a contemporary hero story palatable for Western audiences, one that many brown kids have heard either from family, movies, or friends regardless of religion. Patel additionally provokes dialogue around the Indian government's application of state violence and religion to maintain power.
The film not only explores the oppressionoflower-casteciviliansby governmentsbutalsoreferstoreal-life conflicts, including reports of antiMuslimattacksinIndiainonescene. PatelintegratesacommunityofHijras, transgender/thirdgender,intoacrucial partofthestorylineandKid’scharacter development.Patel’srepresentationof thiscommunityandtheirstrugglesis beautiful,afarcryfromhowtheyare typicallyrepresentedinSouthAsianand Westernmedia.
While Patel’s performance was spectacular, Sikandar Kher, Adithi Kalkunte, and Makarand Deshpande’s performances were equally amazing. Kher’s callousness and pretentious demeanour as Officer Rana had me hating him through the screen, which is honestly a hard feat for any actor to achieve.
Kalkunte’s portrayal of Kid’s mother during his childhood was saddening but also sweet, reminding me of my own mother at times which was especially heartbreaking due to her fate in the film. Last but not least, Deshpande as Baba Shakti made me understand why many people do not oppose oppressive political regimes, his manipulative façade of care and his use of religion as a means of mobility.
Monkey Man’s soundtrack overall was captivating and an amazing blend of traditional Desi sounds as well as contemporary rap and suspense. One of Monkey Man’s greatest credits was the casting and inclusion of Ustad Zakir Hussain. Ustad Zakir is regarded as the greatest tabla player of all time, a master of his craft. The integration of his tabla beats with the rhythms of Kid’s punches during the training scene was a testament to his expertise, establishing rhythm as a key pillar of Monkey Man.
Monkey Man is an exceptional synthesis of visual narrative and philosophy, no doubt beginning Dev Patel's directorial career with a large bang. I will conclude this review with my favourite quote from the film: “The pain. It will leave you once it’s finished teaching you.”
TheHour andHalf Chocolate Cake
by Samara dixon
Want to bake a last-minute cake that will impress anyone? Maybe you need a quick sugar fix to get you through semester 2? Follow these tips and tricks for making the perfect hour and a half chocolate cake that anyone will enjoy
We have enlisted the help of avid amateur self-taught baker, Samara Dixon, to share her best kept secrets to making a delicious cake that is sure the impress absolutely anyone!
The secret recipe makes a 1x 5 inch cake and 11 cupcakes. Don’t forget to preheat your oven to 180 degrees celcius before you begin....
RECIPE
FOR THE CAKE
1 3/4 cup Plain flour
1 1/2 cup Cocoa Powder
1 Pinch baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 ¾ cup Caster sugar
1 cup milk
2 Eggs
1/2 cup Hot black coffee
1/2 cup Vegetable oil
2 tsp of vanilla extract
11 tbsp of butter (room temp)
1 Block of chocolate (your choice), broken up into chunks
FOR THE ICING
3 cups of icing sugar
2/3 cups of cocoa powder
1/3 cup of milk and 4 tbsp of butter
INGREDIENTS METHOD
Basically, you can never go wrong with actually baking the cake. Whether you’ve got a stand mixer or an old bowl and your grandma’s wooden spoon… put all of the ingredients together (in the order mentioned above) and mix. Absolutely foolproof (yes, even you).
*TIP Don’t forget the hot coffee, coffee is the secret to any good chocolate cake.
Mix until everything is combined and stop there, no one likes an overachiever.
Then, I like to either spray cooking oil over all over my cake tin or get messy and line it using room temperature butter.
Divy up the mixture into a cake tin and/or cupcake trays to the best of your ability. Then, if you simply cannot wait to taste the cake… my favourite trick is to put some mixture into a cupcake liner and heat it in the microwave for one minute. This provides you with a yummy snack to keep the good flow and cooking energy going.
Let your cake/cupcakes sit in the ovenyou can either:
Set a timer like a loser –approximately 28-35 minutes Lightly press on the top of your cake and if it bounces back then you know you are good to go! Stab your cake with a knife very gently and if the knife comes back with slight crumbs then it’s fully cooked
Whilst waiting for your cake to cook, you can start preparing your icing. Simply add all of the ingredients to a bowl and mix it until every single bit of your anger against your ex out of your system. If this recipe isn’t matched to a T don’t stress! Just keep adding the appropriate ingredients until you get a gorgeous chocolate buttercream.
TIP: if you want normal buttercream, void the cocoa powder from the recipe and add a tiny bit of purple food colouring to eliminate the yellowness of the butter. This will ensure nice white icing.
As soon as your cake is done, let it cool for a bit and then straight into the freezer she goes!
Now, the secret to a good-looking cake is two coats of icing. Your first acts as a ‘crumb coat’ and can be as messy as you want. The second is the pretty coat that makes your cake look good — just make sure you freeze the cake in between the two coats for the fullest benefit.
If you feel like getting fancy you can use a plastic zip-lock seal bag as a piping bag, just fill one corner of the bag with icing, twist the bag and snip the end. This will allow you to pipe some fancy designs or some handwriting. However, for those overachievers like myself, use a piping tip and try some designs.
TIP: add the tip into the zip lock bag before adding any icing and ALWAYS cut less than necessary off the end. This will allow you to cut more as required and will save you a lot of plastic bags in the future.
The key to this is to find either a lazy susan or DIY your own turntable with household items. This will allow you to smooth out both your icing and piping skills to be cohesive around the whole cake. Make sure you turn the cake slowly as you begin to pipe borders. If you are a perfectionist like me, feel free to practice beforehand on a sheet of baking paper.
Lastly, adding any sprinkles or gold leaf (the cheap ones from Coles) will make any cake look better in my opinion. Feel free to use any leftover chocolate and grate it over your cake for some extra sweetness. This recipe is also flexible to add any other ingredients you may have e.g. strawberries in the buttercream, serving with whipped cream, melted varieties of chocolate or adding dulce de leche.
So, you better try out my cake recipe and be sure to post to your Insta story and tag @thehilarian ;)
TheREALTortured PoetsDepartment
We all know that Taylor Swift’s new album, The Tortured Poets Department, is too long for any sane person to listen to. So, to help you learn who all these songs are about, Jennifer Lamb has devised a little game to help you keep up with your Swiftie friends! Draw a line between the song title and who you think it REALLY is about. Answers on page 6 (roll credits) - no cheating!!
Tortured Poets Department
Lionel Messi
Sirius Black
Gypsy Rose Blanchard
Joe Goldberg
Bruce Lehrmann
Robert Irwin
ACasefor LanaDelRey
Whilst on the comedown from Tay Tay leaving our shores earlier this year, I would encourage the people of the Adelaide Law School to delve into another incredible female artist – Lana Del Rey. Although only recently gaining more widespread popularity, Lana has been quietly working away over the last decade to create music that holds a special place in my heart Lana has had some interesting pop culture moments, from her famously criticised SNL performance, Grammy snubs, using ‘witchcraft’ against Donald Trump and more recently, being spotted waitressing in a Waffle House in Florence, Alabama. That being said, one aspect of Lana that speaks for itself is her music Having written eight albums, she has come a long way since her mainstream breakthrough album, Born to Die
Like Taylor, the queen of summertime sadness herself has lore associated with her songwriting, that even a diehard fan such as myself is still picking up. Notable examples include her references to soft drinks or ‘soda’ (Cola, Bartender & Cherry to name a few), frequent use of the word ‘blue’, and referring to the character of ‘Jim’ or ‘Jimmy’ as a fictional representation of an abusive partner and/or addiction (Ultraviolence & A&W – funnily enough ‘A&W’ is also a brand of root beer!). She is also a shrewd observer of American culture and loves to write about specific places, particularly in California (Arcadia is a good example of this).
By Zoe Tammita
Controversy has found Lana in the form of accusations of being an ‘anti-feminist’ and glorifying domestic violence through her music. However, when actually listening to her lyrics, it is clear she is doing the opposite of this (also, I don’t think she particularly cares if people are offended or interpret her music in this way)
If you don’t cope well with stress (like me) and you’re particularly stressed out at the moment because that interim assignment is looming – I highly recommend Lana. Whether it’s her mellow voice or chilled out vibe, I truly believe something about listening to her music has a positive effect on mental health. So, if I’ve still got your attention, allow me to help you out with the best place to start (and if you’re already a fan, keep reading to see if you agree or disagree with my thoughts)
credit: nadia lee cohen & vogue
Where to start with Lana?
My recommendation is to start with LDR’s fifth album, NFR! This album is a masterpiece. There is not a single skip on NFR! Lana’s lyricism hits its peak and it marks her first collaboration with producer Jack Antonoff, long-time collaborator with Taylor Swift. NFR! explores themes of love, feeling misunderstood and underappreciated, while retaining her classic use of American cultural references and places. Most of the album is ‘desert rock’ or soft rock, and Antonoff’s production really shines. Song highlights for me include Norman F**king Rockwell, Mariner’s Apartment Complex, Cinnamon Girl and Happiness is a butterfly
If you’re into a more psychedelic vibe, I recommend starting with Ultraviolence, LDR’s second album This album is certainly one of her best and cemented her as a talented songwriter It is dark and noir and sometimes feels like a James Bond theme (listen to Shades of Cool) Although psychedelic, Ultraviolence is still very accessible Also, be prepared for ‘Jim’ to make an appearance on this album Highlights include Cruel World, Ultraviolence and West Coast
A personal favourite of mine is Lana’s third, and most experimental album, Honeymoon. However, I don’t think this is a good place to start. On first listen of Honeymoon, I was bored. It took a few listens, but once I got it, boy is it an amazing album from start to finish. A particular highlight of Honeymoon is Terrence Loves You which is about David Bowie’s brother, referencing Space Oddity in the best way. Give Honeymoon a try once you know you’re a fan.
All of LDR’s albums have their merits and are definitely worth a listen. Chemtrails Over The Country Club is another favourite (highlight: White Dress). In my opinion, Lust for Life is her weakest album, but it is not a bad album by any stretch. Blue Banisters is a wonderful album, however quite weird at times and not necessarily a good first exposure to LDR. Lana’s most recent work Did you know that there’s a tunnel under Ocean Blvd is one of her best (highlights: The Grants, Candy Necklace & Kintsugi). Keep an eye out for LDR’s ninth album and first foray into country music, Lasso – I know I will. Stay Young and Beautiful!
LoveLetterto theO-Bahn
by harry edmonds
It’s late.
I’ve just entered the last bar on the engineering pub crawl and despite it being named the biggest pub crawl in the southern hemisphere, I’m sitting in an empty room with my mate Dan (Mechanical Engineering) and his mate Michael (drop-kick) holding a flaccid drink card in our hands.
“Should we go talk to them?” Dan gestures to a group of girls entering the bar.
Both Michael and I are too awkward to even answer the question.
Jesus. I have to leave this place, I think to myself, so I slink out the back and walk onto the main road.
This day has been a complete failure, I stink of low self-esteem and Coopers Pale Ale. I look up to the sky and sigh…
Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief, that thou her maid art far more fair than she –
…No, stop…I know I shouldn’t… but…I can’t help it but think of you. I close my eyes and think of the grassy fields that you run through, your long winding tunnel. How buses grip onto your rails and for a brief moment transform into trains. I don’t care how many bi-mobiles drive through you every day, you are a feat of transportation and you’re all mine.
I finally get to the end of Rundle Street and…
But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and the O’Bahn is the sun.
I hate Colonel William Light for saying that the parklands should remain protected. Screw your grid and your irrelevant parklands Mr Light! O’Bahn, I love how you snake through from East Terrace to Dequetteville, you’re a patriot, a symbol of the loud Adelaidean.
credit: lewin day
Screw it. Let’s go public. I want everyone to know that I walk through your tunnel every Saturday night to get home, I don’t care that it’s against the rules, I love you and you love me Come on O’Bahn Tonight, I NEED you to take me take me to Paradise. Paradise Interchange.
Huh? Yes, Zone C, Paradise Interchange, you’ve heard of it, haven’t you O’Bahn? Take me there please.
…What was that O’Bahn?
Yes, that’s where I live. What? No, I’m not using you. Sorry? “I’m using you as a form of uncongested and efficient transport to get home”, what does that even mean? Why are you always like this O’Bahn? You ALWAYS start arguments with me. And no, I’m not tapping my MetroCard, there’s no money on it. Ugh! Just take me home, asshole.
Cite any of the following articles and get 10% off your next Turnitin similarity report
THE THE LAWYER LAWYER
I cleaned that tray three f*cking times
Credit: Miramax
“TheyWereDoingWhat?!?”
A2024TakeonRvBrown
By Issy Penna
POV: It’s 2:00AM on a weeknight and you are yet to complete your readings for class tomorrow You cannot for the life of you understand what the Judge is saying, you’ve read the same sentence 5 times, and it seems like grammar is something the courts have once again failed in recognising Don’t worry, we’ve all been there at one point or another
So, like the Good Samaritan I am, I’ve decided to lend a helping hand to fellow law students in need of digestible case summaries so they can ace those seminars, quizzes, exams, and assignments (thank me when you get that HD).
The first case we will cover together is the particularly scandalous R v Brown [1994] 1 AC 212. Get a Word document open because class starts NOW!
OMGGG PLEASE SPILL THE TEA I AM BEGGING!
GIRLS! Do I have the update of the century for you!
I know we have brunch tomorrow to debrief BUT THIS ACTUALLY CANNOT WAIT!
Guess what I found out about Johnny and his mates last night
Maya Mustill
Miss girl what do you mean? What was on the video?
Like what did they do to break the law?
Ok so, this is all very ~alleged~ so please keep it on the DL.
Basically, someone reported this video of the guys to the police, and they got arrested because they violated sections 20 and 47 of the Offences Against the Persons Act or something! Something about malicious wounding and causing actual bodily harm
Taylor Templeman
Lucy Lowry
Taylor Templeman
Taylor Templeman
Major trigger warning though.
I was so speechless when I heard what they did and am still very much shocked JUST SAY IT!!!
Sadie Slynn
Don’t leave us on a cliff-hanger. You brought it up to begin with
Jess Jauncey
You’ve got to be joking right!?
That isn’t actually real??
When you said harm what do you mean?
Lucy Lowry
EXCUSE ME?!!!! Not what I expected to hear on a Friday afternoon to say the least.
That’s so Fifty Shades of Grey coded.
How did they get arrested for that though? I’m so confused
Like yeah, it’s a bit extreme but if it was all consensual and in private how is it any business of the police? Or anyone else?
Taylor Templeman
Ugghhhhhh ok ok don’t say I didn’t warn you though!
In the video the guys were in some sort of fivesome situation. You know what I mean.
And they were getting FREAKY!!! It was actually kind of sadomasochistic, some of the ‘activities’ they were ‘occupying’ themselves with
Taylor Templeman
Well those details I don’t know but the guys were injured in the process.
That’s ALL I know!!!
Maya Mustill
Lucy Lowry
I guess the question is, can any person truly consent to activities if the result is such severe harm? It might seem like “what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom”, but if someone is really hurt, whether there was consent or not becomes a bit irrelevant
I see your point, but I agree with Maya. We would have to know for certain that everyone wanted to take part in it first, but if everyone consented then I don’t see a problem
Sorry ladies but, ABSOLUTELY NOT!! When you think about it, the police can’t let people get away with that sort of behaviour. Harm is harm and I don’t care if everyone agreed to it
you Jess for sure
Yeah, same here. Seems like the majority view is that when it comes to these sorts of circumstances, consent is irrelevant
Either way I’m glad its not me
Yeah for sure
Glad you told us all this drama now Tay. This is way too wild of a story to tell over brunch
Sadie Slynn
Jess Jauncey
I’m with
Taylor Templeman
Lucy Lowry
Maya Mustill
Taylor Templeman
Sadie Slynn
The mallest n Who Ever Lived
By Chris Mary
that Taylor wrote her recent hit, an Who Ever Lived’, about The Matty Healy – real ones know all was the MONA lawsuit.
The Museum of Old and New Art (‘MONA’) is no stranger to controversy. Rather, its founder David Walsh welcomes it, finding provocation a “part of MONA’s DNA”. Safe to say I was unsurprised to find them once again in the news although, considering my past experiences, I expected the headlines to be accompanied by “satanic ritual” not “sex discrimination”.
The MONA Ladies Lounge, the brainchild of Kirsha Kaechele, is a velvet clad, private room with a personal concierge and butlers wielding golden trays of champagne "who live to serve women, attending to their every wish and showering them with praise and affection”. It features some of the museum’s most acclaimed artworks exclusively for the eyes of those who identify as women. The Lounge, which has been open since 2020, has had to close its doors as a result of one man’s crusade against discrimination.
Jason Lau, like all tourists in Hobart, was admittedly quite excited to see the only attraction of note in the city (per my very limited google searches). Lau on 1 April 2023 purchased an entry ticket to MONA but was denied entry into the Lounge as he did not identify as a “lady”. Lau lodged a complaint with the Tasmanian Civil and Administrative Tribunal on the basis that he had experienced “direct discrimination” on the grounds of gender in breach of sections 14, 16(e) and 22 of the Tasmanian Anti-Discrimination Act 1998. Lau claimed that by denying his entry, the museum failed to provide a “fair provision of goods and services in line with the law” to him and other visitors who had paid for entry, but did not identify as women.
PhotobyLukeBowden
PhotobyJesseHunniford
Photoby:CharlotteVignau
Section 16 of the ADA prohibits discrimination on grounds of a number of prescribed attributes including, as provided for in subsection (e), gender. Pursuant to section 14 of the ADA “direct discrimination” occurs if a person treats another on the basis of any prescribed attribute less favourably than a person without that attribute. The Tribunal readily accepted that Mr Lau had suffered gender discrimination. The true reason for his denial of entry was his male gender; someone of a female gender in the same circumstances as Mr Lau would have been granted entry. Moreover, considering the value of the art works within the Lounge, which are otherwise inaccessible, Mr Lau in being denied entry has suffered a detriment and therefore been treated “less favourably”.
MONA did not contend that Mr Lau was discriminated against, rather on the evidence of Ms Kaechele, gender discrimination is the “raison d’etre” of the Ladies Lounge. It is participatory installation – the process of visitors being permitted or refused entry is part of the artwork itself and Mr Lau’s exclusion was an essential aspect of the experience. Therefore, the question for the Tribunal was whether the Ladies Lounge was designed to promote equal opportunity for a group disadvantaged because of their gender.
The ADA, like all anti-discrimination legislation, provides for a number of general exceptions against the prohibition under section 26. These include where discrimination is designed to promote equal opportunity for a group of people who are disadvantaged or have a special need because of a prescribed attribute, pursuant to section 26.
The Tribunal accepted that the Ladies Lounge has been “created in an orderly manner with the intention of achieving a desired outcome” and as such is an arrangement for the purposes of section 26. It also accepted that women as a group suffer broad societal disadvantage and particularly female artists as a group tend to experience disadvantage in relation to the display of artworks. MONA contended that the opportunity the Lounge is intended to promote was “represented by the lack of the display of artwork by female artists, the artwork itself, the historical exclusion of women from spaces and the provision of a space for women”, however the Tribunal was not satisfied that the discrimination experienced by Mr Lau was designed to promote equal opportunity.
The Tribunal noted that there was no evidence provided as to the contemporary exclusion of women from spaces other than historical references to men-only clubs, and that Ms Kaechele’s intention in creating the Lounge was to address past wrongs of access rather than addressing current inequalities of opportunities. While the Tribunal accepted that historical disadvantages may lead to ongoing systemic disadvantage, the inconsistent evidence as to the purpose of the Lounge did not go as far as to indicate that the installation is intended to promote equal opportunity. Therefore, the discrimination experienced by Mr Lau was not excused.
So, what’s Kaechele doing about all this you ask? Firstly, MONA intends to appeal the decision in the Tasmanian Supreme Court on the basis that the Tribunal adopted too narrow a view in terms of the ongoing societal disadvantage experienced by women and as a result did not recognise how the experience of the Lounge could promote equal opportunity.
She is also considering “reforming” the Lounge to fall within a number of other exemptions provided under section 27 of the Act Potential plans include turning it into a Bible Study group or bathroom, both which would allow an exemption on the basis that the Lounge is a religious institution or for the provision of use of facilities respectively. In the interim, Kaechele has moved many of the artworks previously featured in the Lounge, namely a number of Picasso’s works, into the female toilets of MONA as a form of retaliation against the judgment.
While the decision is unlikely to have any impact on the status of discrimination law, it highlights the continuing systemic disadvantage women face. The Tribunal’s ruling largely focussed on MONA’s intention for the Lounge rather than the intentions of the artist who created it. Rather reductively, the Tribunal concluded that as David Walsh’s wife Kaechele can be reasonably considered an extension of her husband’s and the museum’s will. This was in spite of Kaechele’s testimony that throughout history the wife’s work is attributed to the husband and that Lounge was not born of a man’s mind but that of a woman, distinct from the will of her husband. In a way the judgment continues the very intent of the Lounge and becomes a part of the art itself.
SketchbyArjanKok
see u in cort baby reindeer
by josh wilson
After getting Covid from Law Ball, my family kindly banished me to my room to rot away for a week. During which, I had time on my hands to revise for the Equity and Constitutional exams finally watch this Baby Reindeer show everyone has been talking about I watched it in one sitting and enjoyed it It was well-written, well-acted and had an exciting plot As of now, the show is up for 11 Emmys and $170 million USD in damages ($255 million AUD).
Baby Reindeer is a biographical series depicting a traumatic time in comedian Richard Gadd’s life starting out as a stand-up comic. During the show, amateur stand-up Donny Dunn (portrayed by Gadd) encounters Martha (portrayed by Jessica Gunning), a twice-convicted stalker who stalks and sexually assaults Donny, as well as his parents and exgirlfriend Netflix labelled the show as based on a true story and the show had 22 million viewers at its peak
Like a law student with too much time on their hands, I started looking into the legal action currently being brought by Fiona Harvey, the “real life Martha” who claims to be the depicted stalker in Richard Gadd’s show, filing for a quarter of a billion AUD.
After apparently receiving deaththreats and other harassing material, Harvey launched herself into the spotlight with an interview with professional interrupter Piers Morgan on his show During the interview, Harvey admitted to having a few interactions with Gadd, but denies all serious allegations of stalking or assault Netflix has continued to support Gadd through Harvey’s claims.
So, if Harvey v Netflix materialised and they had it out in the US Supreme Court, how would it go down? I decided to examine a few defamation elements and place my bet on the victor
Pictured left is Martha (portrayed by Jessica Gunning), the stalker character from Netflix’s Baby Reindeer Right is Fiona Harvey on Piers Morgan Uncensored Pretty similar, hey?
identification of the defamed person
For a successful claim, Harvey must show the matter could be reasonably taken to be about her In other words, she must prove she is the Martha in the show. Remember, for torts, everything must be proven on our good old friend the balance of probabilities. Netflix Policy Chief has claimed in UK Parliament, “we did take every reasonable precaution in disguising the real-life identities of the people involved in that story ” I don’t think this claim will hold water As you can see from the side-by-side of Martha and Fiona, any reasonable person would believe the show’s depiction is pretty spot-on. She looks like her, sounds like her, she even tweeted to Richard Gadd “my curtains need hung badly”, part of a significant scene in the first episode. Netflix, by accident or not, made Martha appear exactly like Fiona Harvey
If anyone with an internet connection and a brain can track her down a few hours after the show’s release, I think there’s a pretty good chance Harvey could succeed in arguing she is the Martha from the show.
defamatory material
For a successful claim, the representation must expose the person to hatred, contempt, ridicule, or obloquy (strong public condemnation) The Martha character is made out to be a professional stalker who has been to prison for four and a half years. In the show, she stalks and assaults Gadd’s character multiple times. The media backlash and death-threats Harvey claims to have received will likely satisfy this standard of obloquy as everyone hates her now. In the Californian Civil Code, any statement that falsely accuses another person of a crime is defamatory per se, regardless of damage to the defamed person The press have been unable to find a criminal record of Fiona Harvey so far. If a court finds likewise, whether Harvey’s reputation was damaged is irrelevant – it is prima facie defamation to say she was a convicted stalker.
this is a true story
Gadd begins his show with the disclaimer, “this is a true story”. It is even marketed as such in the poster (left). Films and TV shows are notoriously very hazy on what “true story” means Richard Gadd has gone on plenty of media stints explaining how Baby Reindeer is a factual recount of a time in his life This will likely preclude the defence that the show was merely a work of fiction since the reasonable person thinks the show is “true”. California, like Australia, has a substantial truth defence which acts as a complete defence to any defamation claim.
Netflix and Gadd have the onus of proof if they wish to raise a substantial truth defence. Gadd claims to have key pieces of evidence to strengthen this defence: 41,000 emails, 350 hours of voice messages and 100 pages of letters This could certainly contribute to his argument about his alleged abuse at the hands of his stalker Additionally, he could obtain any police reports regarding his stalker, or evidence his stalker went to prison. In another recent Piers Morgan interview, Scottish barrister Laura Wray claims to have briefly hired, and subsequently be stalked by Fiona Harvey prior to Harvey’s interaction with Gadd Wray has no connection to Gadd whatsoever and has confirmed that Harvey stalked her family, including Wray’s disabled child (another minor plot point depicted in the show). Could this be yet another high-profile defamation claim that is dismissed simply because the defamed person did exactly* what the defendant said they did (Bruce, BRS, looking at you).
what have we learned here?
Well, if you are going to make a show that is incredibly embarrassing to a real person, make sure it’s substantially true Honestly, I am shocked Netflix allowed Martha to be so identifiable in the first place. Netflix do not seem to be wavering in light of Harvey’s claims, which makes me suspicious that Gadd has told them something we don’t know. I think Netflix fancy their chances, and there’s no such thing as bad publicity, now is there? Harvey has only drawn more attention to herself by going on Uncensored and has perpetuated the show’s hype. All the while, the suits at Netflix must be rubbing their hands together having produced a show that is so good, Fiona Harvey doesn’t want you to see it.
SUBMITTOTHEHILARIAN
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