auror logs

MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEMENT PATROL:

◊ 4/4/21 5:45 PM - Two underage youths apprehended behind a Taco Bell attempting to transfigure a chalupa supreme into real food.

◊ 4/17/21 7:20 PM - Witch arrested on the corner of Sesame St. for attempting to sell counterfit virility potions. Customers are not believed to be in danger as the potions only contained tobasco sauce and wishful thinking.

DEPARTMENT FOR THE REGULATION AND CONTROL OF MAGICAL CREATURES:

◊ 4/1/21 6:45 AM - Mage apprehended while attempting to smuggle a strange, hairy beast past customs. Experts later identified the beast as my mother in law. HA CHA CHA CHA!

DEPARTMENT OF INTOXICATING SUBSTANCES

◊ 5/9/21 9:17 PM - Report of a wizard making peanut butter so delicious that people would and have murdered for it. Investigation is ongoing.

◊ 5/15/21 4:02 AM - Bootleg fire whiskey seized from an unauthorized home distillery. The alcohol was disposed of on site.

IMPROPER USE OF MAGIC OFFICE

◊ 6/4/21 2:33 PM - Wizard arrested for attempting illegal charms on a goat. AGAIN. ◊ 6/19/21 10:12 AM - Three wizards were caught attempting to cast a flying charm on a muggle vacuum. When questioned, the ring leader stated "Trust me, this will make Quidditch hilarious." Citations were issued.

DEPARTMENT OF MYSTERIES

◊ klsdfjlsdfjsjflsdfjlsadfjskjdflsjflsahgjghoieoieuoiweuuroewiovsgnvkshsdjfhsdfskjhfskhfkshfksjhfkjsfhjksdfhkjsdfhdjfhksjfhskhfksddhfksdkfhsfdkhsdhfkksjhfksjdhfksjdhfkjsdf

◊ bork

◊ bork bork bork bork bork

◊ Ixcvxcvxzcvxcvxczvzxcvxcvxzcvxcvxcvxcvcxvxzcv

The Minister of Magic and The Head of Magical Law Enforcement would like to thank the Auror Headquarters, Wizengamot Administration Services, Hit Wizards, Investigation Department, Ministry of Magic Witch Watchers, Office for the Detection and Confiscation of Counterfeit Defensive Spells and Protective Objects, and all others that keep our world safe.

D P A E RTMENT OF MAGICAL LAW ENFORCEM E NT * MEDIA DIVISION