August 26, 2011 - The Jewish Star by The Jewish Star

Editorial: A revolution remembered Page 4 “What do you like about Shabbos?” Page 11 Training rabbis to identify abuse Page 13 Rebbetzin on TXTNG Page 14

THE JEWISH

STAR

VOL 10, NO 33 ■ AUGUST 26, 2011 / 26 AV, 5771

WWW.THEJEWISHSTAR.COM

Impossible cuts?

Turner and Weprin debate before packed shul By Sergey Kadinsky Amid catcalls and hollers, Congressional candidates David Weprin and Bob Turner held their first debate on Aug. 22 at Young Israel of Kew Gardens Hills. The shout-fest appeared to be a match between an idealist and a calm, but negative pragmatist in the fight for Anthony Weiner’s former seat. “This Congress is out of control. My first reaction was to write a check,” said Turner, describing the moment 18 months ago when he threw his hat into politics. “My wife said, ‘Why don’t you do something?’ I’m a citizen candidate.” Describing the debt-saddled federal government as “irresponsible and ridiculous,” the Republican contender spoke of slashing the federal budget by a third, prioritizing which agencies would see the cuts, and advocating total elimination of some, including the Department of Agriculture. His Democratic opponent, State Assemblyman David Weprin, countered that such a huge cut would unavoidably affect Medicare. “It is impossible to cut the federal budget by 35 percent and not cut Medicare. I am running to preserve Medicare and Social Security. My opponent would like to change Social Security and Medicare,” Weprin said amid heckling from Turner supporters. Turn-

‘Tremble and quake’

-2 Samuel 22:8

Readers write from the epicenter and beyond. Page 3

Continued on page 2

Photo courtesy stock.xchng/Photo illustration by Alyson Goodman

Shabbat Candlelighting: 7:18 p.m. Shabbat ends 8:18 p.m. 72 minute zman 8:47 p.m. Torah Reading Parshat Re’eh This Tuesday and Wednesday is Rosh Hodesh Elul

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Photo bySergey Kadinsky

David Weprin, moderator Richard Hellenbercht and Bob Turner at debate.

Turner and Weprin go head to head Continued from page 1

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er spokesman Bill O’Reilly accused Weprin of lying to the audience, pointing out that former mayor Ed Koch’s endorsement of Turner hinged on Turner vowing not to tamper with these two programs. As an alternative to deep cuts, Weprin proposed tax hikes for millionaires and large corporations, alongside his own experience in managing budgets. “I have a public and private sector background. We’ve balanced eight budgets without cutting services,” Weprin said, describing his two terms on the City Council, where he chaired the finance committee. While the budget, Social Security, and Tea Party allegations took up a sizable chunk of the debate, Weprin also faced widespread jeering on his recent vote in favor of gay marriage in New York, with many Orthodox audience members calling his position hypocrisy. “I did vote for gay marriage and I did not look to it as a religious issue,” Weprin said. When asked by moderator Brian Rafferty of Queens Tribune how he would vote on gay marriage in Washington, Weprin deferred, arguing that it is an issue for states to decide. Weprin’s vote on gay marriage spoke of principle, but it also cost him the support of State Assembly colleague Dov Hikind. “Weprin basically used his Jewish Orthodoxy to say gay marriage is okay. That crossed the line,” Hikind told New York Post. The Weprin campaign countered Hikind’s snub with Sen. Joseph Lieberman, who will be noshing with State Assembly speaker Sheldon Silver at a $1,000 a plate fundraiser in support of Weprin at Abigail’s on Broadway on Aug. 31. “While David Weprin can be counted on to fight for the safety and security of the State of Israel, we can also rely on him to protect seniors and working families,” Lieberman said. With New York scheduled to lose two of its congressional seats next year, both candidates vowed to defend the district. “If we’re going to lose a seat, it should be upstate,” Weprin said. Turner said that with the nation closely watching this race, the Republican majority in Congress would not erase a district where it would win. “One way or another, you will be represented.”

KOSHER CRITIC Zechariah Mehler is away this week and will return next week.

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August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

condition of my office. HERB MAREK Woodmere

Wednesday brought a 5.9 earthquake that shook the east coast from the Carolinas to Canada. The Jewish Star readership chimed in on their experiences:

■■■

I was in the Jewish Children’s Museum in Crown Heights; the entire building was shaking, the lights were moving. There is construction outside on the street, and some were saying that it was coming from there. A group of South American tourists, who were visiting with their Chabad-Lubavitch rabbi, were shrieking. DOVID ZAKLIKO

I live in the west end of Richmond. This is about 30 miles east of the epicenter. My home office is on the second floor; the walls and windows began to vibrate and rumble. My first thought was to get outside in the street. I grabbed both cell and land line phones. It was definitely a life changing experience. I did not want to be in a pile of rubble. My main concern was my wife. She works in an office building in Richmond. Both land and cell lines were dead. Finally she called; they had evacuated her building. I went over to my elderly Jewish neighbors and they were ok. They were originally from Brooklyn, and we were from Yonkers and New Jersey. G-d was watching out for us. HAROLD GOLDBERG Richmond, Virginia

■■■

As we finished mincha in the offices of the World Jewish Congress on the 17th floor, I looked at Chaim Reiss (of Far Rockaway) and we felt the room shaking. The Hatzola members who daven with us listened to their radios. Some stuck their hands in their pockets and give an extra bit to tzedaka. ELIEZER COHEN

■■■

I absolutely felt the earthquake, as did my baby. I thought I was hallucinating. Hashem is trying to tell us that the world is falling apart. So He has to make it clear with a sign. And now we need to come together and open our hearts. We have to learn and look and be ready. I’m my father’s Chasid. NESHAMA CARLEBACH Manhattan ■■■

I noticed people pouring onto the street from the building next to ours on Third Avenue and 59th Street in Manhattan. Apparently the IT guys heard 9.5 and they flipped out. The guy announcing the emergency had no idea what 5.9 was versus 9.5, but to anyone with some knowledge especially a guy from San Francisco it was the scariest thing he could imagine. Leading our other employees, the San Franciscan was down 17 flights in three minutes. B’H everyone is OK. Just reminds us of the power that Hashem invested into the natural world He designed. DAVID BIBI Sephardic Congregation of Long Beach ■■■

We felt the earthquake in The Jewish Channel’s Manhattan headquarters. Thankfully, our extra investments in quality equipment meant none was damaged. STEVEN I. WEISS ■■■

I was in my office at 200 Park Ave, above Grand Central on the 24th floor. The floor shook for about one minute, and having been across the street from WTC on 9/11 and at 140 Broadway during the first WTC bombing

■■■ Photo by David F. Nesenoff

Assistant Editor, Sergey Kadinsky, eerily pauses from his falafel lunch as an earthquake shakes The Jewish Star newsroom. - I hit the stairs with my colleagues with a fear that something occurred on the tracks in Grand Central. WILLIAM (ZEV) SKOLNICK ■■■

My chair was shaking. The building was shaking. The light fixtures were swaying in the pressroom. By the time I started to panic it was over. Wow. Very scary. RHONDA GLICKMAN V.P. Sales, Herald Community Newspapers, Garden City ■■■

I was at my computer, viewing e-mails. This is not my first quake. I come from San Francisco, California. I have felt stronger quakes. SHELDON LEVIN ■■■

I didn’t feel a thing. RABBI ABRAHAM TWERSKI New Jersey ■■■

I happened to be sitting on a rock by the water of Far Rockaway Beach when I felt the rock start to shake. I thought maybe my coffee was just too strong this morning and I was reacting to the caffeine. Elul is approaching and Hashem is giving us an early warning. Time for tshuva. REVA WEINGOT Far Rockaway ■■■

I was in my office in Cedarhurst when I felt the rumble. At first I thought it was because a plane was

passing by and you sometimes feel that a tiny bit. Mark Rubin Cedarhurst ■■■

I was at my desk at South Baldwin Jewish Center where I am office manager. I could not believe that the floor was vibrating and thought I was having a dizzy spell or some type of inner ear imbalance. The temple was empty and I walked through the building to see if I should remove the Sifre Torah from the arks. MURRAY ALTMAN Baldwin ■■■

I was sitting in my office. I thought someone next door was kicking the wall. If people don’t see HaShem’s hand in what is happening in the physical, financial and international political world, then they are truly blind. SHMUEL IDLER ■■■

I was sitting on a chair at my office, which normally sits on the floor, but for 30 seconds it wasn’t. Was someone doing construction work on the block? Was the building old and finally giving out? Earthquake? Can’t be. This is NY. HANNAH MILLER ■■■

I was underground on the A train in a tunnel under the East River and I did not feel a thing! In fact when my office called to tell me of an earthquake, I thought they were making a joking reference to the

It was 1:54 p.m., because it was around the time I leave my cubicle for our building’s mincha minyan. I felt my chair rocking slightly, and my first thought was that my coffee was spiked. I remember as a teenager in Washington Heights waking up to a stronger tremor which was shaking my bed a bit. Time for us all to wake up and perform some cheshbonos hanefesh! MICHAEL POPPERS ■■■

I was working in Port Jefferson. One person thought they had vertigo until she realized it was an earthquake. LEWIS STEIN Lawrence ■■■

It felt like home. Growing up in LA we had earthquakes all the time. Seems like LA conditions followed me to the Big Apple. RIVKA LOCK ■■■

I was in the Holland Tunnel! I could have been trapped, suffocated crushed, you name it! But nothing! How come everyone got to feel it but not me? It’s not fair! I want my tremor! ARI WARTELSKY ■■■

I was davening mincha in Lower Manhattan at the time, and didn’t feel a thing. JEFFREY GRUNSTEIN ■■■

Didn’t feel it here in Teaneck but maybe that’s because I have 4 boys to deal with! SHIRA WEISS

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I was in Cedarhurst at camp. I didn’t feel a thing! JUDD EISENBERG ■■■

We have some tile work being done in the bathroom, so I thought, wow, this tile guy is hammering so hard that it’s shaking the house. We ran outside and heard several house alarms going off from what must have been vibration, but we still thought our house was the only one shaking because earthquakes don’t happen in New York! But one just did! What bracha do we say now? VAN AMERONGEN FAMILY Woodmere ■■■

Seeing everyone here in Mineola outside their buildings, gave me the feeling what it’ll look like when Moshiach arrives, everyone outside sharing the good news. RABBI ANCHELLE PERL Mineola ■■■

Our daughter was having a tutoring lesson in the dining room when she noticed the antique mirror in the center foyer was swaying and then she jumped! The water in the glass was swaying; the crystal chandelier was swaying. PENNY AND HAROLD WALDMAN ■■■

I was in the middle of mincha with a minyan that meets near my office in Brooklyn. At first I thought it was just me. But it wasn’t, others felt it. I thought maybe Hashem was getting ready to take us to Yerushalayim. STEVEN R. KATZ Forest Hills ■■■

I was sitting in my office in suburban New Jersey when it hit. The shaking made me think I was sick. We got everyone out of the office. The funny thing is the smokers outside didn’t feel a thing. Now I can scratch an earthquake off my bucket list. STEPHEN M. FLATOW Fairfield, NJ ■■■

The times are a changing and after all the deconstruction that humans have raged on Mother Nature -- these events/occurrences, I am afraid will be happening more often than not. ADRIENNE SIOUX KOOPERSMITH Chicago

THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

Earthquake: “G-d smacking His hands together with grief.” (Brochos 59b)

August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

Opinion Editorial

Remembering one fall and watching the other

t was twenty years ago this week that the Kadinsky family was visiting distant relatives in Leningrad. Midnight sun illuminated the eerily silent streets. News shows were censored in favor of endless repeats of Tchaikovsky’s Swan Lake. The writing on the wall was clear. A coup was underway in Moscow. The Kadinskys were not refuseniks, they were unassuming secular Soviet citizens. A couple with stable jobs and two sons, residing in a modern apartment complex on the western edge of Riga, Latvia. The conservative coup failed, and what remained of the Soviet perestroika government gave way to separatism and nationalism. The predictability of Soviet life transformed into the freedom and instability of capitalism. With support of relatives in New York, the Kadinsky family immigrated to the New World. But to this day, they share the view of many Russian émigrés declaring, “United States did not win the Cold War. Russia lost it. Russia defeated itself.” This week, the same occurred in Libya, where high-ranking members of the Gadhafi regime defected to join protesters, asking for western air cover, while careful to warn against the use of ground forces. The image of soldiers expressing brotherhood with civilians is akin to the image of babushkas in Moscow baking bread for the tankists, urging them not to follow through on the coup. The leadership of Mustafa Abdel-Jalil, who served as Gadhafi’s Minister of Justice, is akin to Boris Yeltsin, a card-carrying communist for 29 years before he took up the tricolor banner of post-Soviet Russia.

Now comes the difficult part. Americans cheered on post-Soviet Latvia as a beacon of democracy. But this Baltic republic took on a nationalist tone that denied citizenship to 15 percent of its residents, ethnic minorities branded as postwar Soviet settlers. SS veteran parades marched through the medieval old city of Riga. By the same token of freedom, a Chabad school also opened up in the city, as did a McDonald’s franchise. Eventually, citizenship and pensions were eventually restored to many “Soviet settlers,” SS veteran parades were vigorously condemned, and Latvia became more worthy of its image as a democracy. Not so much for neighboring Russia. Which leaves questions on Libya. How are the relations between its Arabs, Tuaregs and Berbers? How much will Islam influence the legal frame work? Will Libya become a nation-state like Turkey, or a fragmented state of autonomies as Iraq and Lebanon? Is Abdel-Jalil the next Vaclav Havel, or a Libyan variant of Vladimir Putin? Will the victorious rebels remain pro-American, or turn into a postwar enemy, as in the Taliban example? Who will be running in the country’s first free election? All of this remains to be seen, but for now, the Libyans should take pride. They pulled it off. With experienced leaders, trained fighters, and limited international support. Libya had defeated itself. But it won a victory in self-respect, finally toppling the laughingstock buffoon who kept the country in isolation. Look over your shoulders, Kim Jong Il and Bashar alAssad. No dynasty reigns forever.

THE JEWISH

Clean limericks, dirty world There once was a man named Gaddafi, Who blew up a plane in Lockerbie, Trump charged him rent, For setting up a tent, But soon he will fall or Trip-o-li.

DAVID’S HARP

There once was a man named Saddam Hussein, In the kingdom of Iraq he did reign, But he fell to his knees, Without WMDs, And we still can’t afford 83 octane. There once was a man named Mubarak, Who had a new friend named Barack, But now for a while, He will be on trial, So with friends like Obama… good luck. David F. Nesenoff There once was an anti-Jewish anti-Israel thing, But the name didn’t have a very good ring, So the world emptied its pockets, Threw in some rockets, And now it’s called the “Arab Spring.”

Yankie & Luzer Where were you during the earthquake?

On earth.

STAR

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David F. Nesenoff Sergey Kadinsky Helene Parsons Hy Spitz Sandi Stanger Rabbi Avi Billet Jeff Dunetz Rabbi Binny Freedman Brigitte Fixler Rabbi Noam Himelstein Alan Jay Gerber Zechariah Mehler Aviva Rizel Ariel Rosenbloom Anna Hardcastle Alyson Goodman Christina Daly

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Crown Heights: 20 years later, Part two Three hours after the tragic crash, 29-yearold Australian Jewish scholar Yankel Rosenbaum was attacked by a gang of black teens. He was stabbed four times. Cops quickly arrested Lemrick Nelson, who was identified by Rosenbaum as his attacker. Rosenbaum was expected to recover. Mayor Dinkins visited Rosenbaum at the hospital. But Yankel died at 2:30 a.m. on Tuesday because the hospital staff POLITICO missed one of his knife TO GO wounds. The next evening, according to the sworn testimony of Efraim Lipkind, a former Hasidic resident of Crown Heights, Sharpton started agitating the crowd. “Then we had a famous man, Al Sharpton, who came down, and he said Tuesday night, kill the Jews, Jeff Dunetz two times. I heard him, and he started to lead a charge across the street to Utica [Avenue]” With each passing hour the violence worsened, Jewish leaders began to desperately complain about the lack of protection to the authorities. They said that the rioters were being allowed to rampage unchecked,

too little force was being brought to bear, and too few arrests were being made. Area Jews felt the police were under orders by the city’s first black mayor to hold back, that the police were not allowed to fight against the black rioters, who continued to grow bolder in their anti-Semitic attack as they sensed the appeasement. The fact is that Mayor David Dinkins responded to the riot immediately by deploying 2,000 police officers and making a personal visit to the troubled neighborhood under a hail of rocks and epithets hurled at him by fellow blacks. Dinkins has spoken of his own mishandling of the riots. Admitting he “screwed up Crown Heights.” “I regret not saying to the police brass sooner ‘whatever you guys are doing is not working,’ It was then they altered their behavior and they were able to contain the ravaging young blacks who were attacking Jews… I will forever be accused of holding back the police and permitted blacks to attack Jews, however that did not happen. It is just inaccurate.” In all, the street violence against the Crown Heights Jews lasted three days starting with the evening of the accident. On Thursday evening, cops finally restored order, although sporadic violence against Jews continued for weeks after the riot was contained. Yankel Rosenbaum wasn’t the only person

Celebrating Our 24th Year

murdered by the rioters. Forgotten by history was the murder of Italian-American Anthony Graziosi, who was driving in Crown heights on Sept. 5. Graziosi was dragged out of his car, brutally beaten and stabbed to death because his full beard and dark clothing, causing him to be mistaken for a Hasidic Jew. During the funeral of Gavin Cato four days after the riot, Sharpton gave an antiSemitic eulogy, fueling fires of hatred, using words that could have been written by Desmond Tutu. “The world will tell us he was killed by accident. Yes, it was a social accident... It’s an accident to allow an apartheid ambulance service in the middle of Crown Heights... Talk about how Oppenheimer in South Africa sends diamonds straight to Tel Aviv and deals with the diamond merchants right here in Crown Heights. The issue is not anti-Semitism; the issue is apartheid... All we want to say is what Jesus said: If you offend one of these little ones, you got to pay for it. No compromise, no meetings, no kaffe klatsch, no skinnin’ and grinnin’. Pay for your deeds.” The first Shabbat after the funeral, Sharpton tried unsuccessfully to kick up tensions again by marching 400 protesters in front of the Lubavitch headquarters shouting “No Justice, no Peace.”

The Aftermath Sharpton abandoned the Caribbean people of Crown Heights as soon as the anti-

Semitic violence had died down. His entire participation in the violence may have been a calculated effort to usurp Jesse Jackson as the leading spokesman for African-Americans. Jackson may have had is “Hymie-town,” but Sharpton’s incitement against those Jews who held the power he desired were more than words. The media portrayed the Crown Heights riot as two-sided, promoting the myth that both blacks and Jews were equal in their violence. The violence was a one-sided rampage waged by some of the neighborhood’s 180,000-strong black majority against a Jewish minority of 20,000. Perhaps the media sugarcoated the riot because it was unprecedented in American history. For some, it’s impossible to perceive blacks as purveyors of bigotry instead of being the victims of hate. The Crown Heights riot occurred just five months after the infamous Rodney King beating, an act of police brutality against an African American, which was video-taped and repeated on television ad nauseum. To this day, antisemitism is still not recognized by the media. Al Sharpton was given a prime-time program. Jeff Dunetz is the Editor/Publisher of the political blog “The Lid” (www.jeffdunetz.com). Jeff contributes to some of the largest political sites on the internet. Jeff lives on Long Island.

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THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

Opinion

August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

Parshat Re’eh

Hebrew only please!

To live forever A

s September looms and the thought of what the UN could vote upon in reference to Israel comes scarily closer, many feel the desperation of the future of the State of Israel. Not only that, but recent terror attacks once again remind us that the uncertainty that continues to dominate elements of Israel’s future may sometimes foment within us feelings of despair over what is yet to come. The Torah tells us, “You are children of the Lord, your G-d. You shall neither cut yourselves nor make any baldness between your eyes for the dead.” (Devarim 14:1) The specific prohibition is against certain acts of body desecration Rabbi Avi Billet practiced by pagans in mourning, but it also implies that there is a deeper connection to G-d that presupposes any need for such extreme measures. Rabbi Shimshon Nadel, a friend of mine, pointed me in the direction of the comment of the Seforno on this pasuk. He says, “You are children of G-d. It is not proper to exhibit complete and utter concern and pain over the deceased when there are still close relatives, even more honored, among the living. Therefore ‘You are children of G-d’ [reminds us] that ‘Your father [in heaven] lives forever.’ Don’t make a baldness because you are a holy nation… don’t suffer too much for the deceased who died ‘You are a holy nation’ destined for the world to come, where ‘bad times’ are better than all of our lives on this earth.” The Sforno argues that we have two things going for us that transcend all kinds of trials and tribulations on earth. Our Father in Heaven is always there, and we are all destined for the glory of the World to Come. It’s an amazing thing to think about. In the scheme of the world, even those of us who live to be centenarians only exist for a relative blip in human history. Every person who lived before us, from every regular Joe to even the worst dictators in history, might have thought of their time and their existence as the time to be living, when the decisions they made were the most important the world had ever seen. There is no question that all of history played a part in shaping and framing the world we have today. But 100 years from now, when very few of us will still be around, how important will our decisions,

actions, and choices of today still be? Will we still have family members who remember us, who will even visit our graves? Edmund Burke said, “Those who do not learn from history are destined to repeat it.” I believe there is much truth to this statement. The Jewish approach has always taken this to a higher level. Might I suggest that Judaism has stood not only for learning from history, but living within our history. We not only crave and yearn for great leaders of the past generation (how many still look to Rabbis Aharon Kotler, Moshe Feinstein, Shlomo Zalman Auerbach, Joseph B. Soloveitchik, the Chazon Ish etc.), but we also look to the Vilna Gaon, Maimonides, Rashi, the Geonim, the Tanaim and Amoraim, King David, Moshe, our forefathers. We not only learn from them, but we use their wisdom to guide how we live today. What keeps us going most of all is our living Father in heaven. There are difficult times, and tragedy strikes all too often. Sometimes it comes in the form of terrorism, sometimes it comes in the form of a disease, sometimes it comes in the form of a terrible accident. None are immune from it. Some seem to get more of a free pass, and some seem to suffer more than others. But our national experience will one day lead to that which the Sforno reminds us is our ultimate destiny: the blissful experience of the world to come. It is often hard to remember, particularly because we are building legacies and trying to make the world cleaner and better for our future generations. We forget that our little blip in the existence of the world is our chance to land ourselves a better spot in the world to come. I am not suggesting not to mourn when we experience a loss. Particularly when the loss seems or is unnatural, we are very sad because we will miss the person very much. And it never seems fair that that’s the “only” chance the person will get. And thinking “he or she is in a better place” is really only comforting when the deceased was suffering immeasurably in this world – not when life was snuffed out in an instant. But if we can shift our focus and imagine that a day will come when we will join our friends and loved ones in experiencing heavenly bliss, it will give our lives greater meaning. We will not need to resort to pagan practices that will only make our existence in this world suffer, because we will be renewed with a sense of purpose to live our lives in such a way that we will be able to join our loved ones when our Father in Heaven allows us to enter the world to come.

A Jewish newspaper should have a Hebrew column. So here it is. We will try to maintain a level of vocabulary so that it will be easy enough for students to read and interesting enough for those more fluent to enjoy.

Peeling squash and other mundane activities

By Rabbi Noam Himelstein

Rabbi Noam Himelstein studied in Yeshivat Har Etzion and served in the Tanks Corps of the IDF. He has taught in yeshiva high schools, post-high school women’s seminaries, and headed the Torah MiTzion Kollel in Melbourne, Australia. He currently teaches at Yeshivat Orayta in Jerusalem, and lives with his wife and six children in Neve Daniel, Gush Etzion.

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BACK TO SCHOOL GUIDE Mesivta Ateres Yaakov 131 Washington Avenue Lawrence, NY 11559 Tel. 516-374-6465 www.ateresyaakov.com Grades 9-12 The 170-student boys high school is welcoming one of its largest freshmen classes into its new facilities in Lawrence. This year’s new academic offerings include the E2K science enrichment program, an expanded posthigh school Bais Medrash program, and new innovative instructional techniques designed to promote SAT, writing, and math skills. In sports, the school aims to retain its championship varsity baseball and volleyball titles, alongside past successes in Mock Trial and Torah Bowl. They also look forward to the completion of the new Gruss Foundation sponsored advanced science lab and the completion of the new adjacent recreation yard.

Rembam Mesivta 15 Frost Lane Lawrence, NY 11559 Tel. 516-371-5824 www.rambam.org Grades 9-12 The school enters its 20th year with its signature theme of Torah, middot, and excellence. The school offers a rich variety of extracurricular activities, ensured to build a community and strengthen the connection between the students and their school. This year, the school is teaming up with alum Andrew Parver of the Hebrew Free Burial Society for a cemetery cleanup. The school will also seek to keep its First Place Award in the Long Island Blood Services Blood Drive competition, which it had led for three consecutive years. Rabbi Avi Haar’s Alumni Shiur will continue to meet during the school year, serving recent alumni with Torah learning programs. Another adult learning program is the Tuesday Night Lecture by Rosh Mesivta Rabbi Zev Meir Friedman and Principal Rabbi Yotav Eliach, open to parents and students. Notable rabbis and authors are invited to Rambam for its Meet the Author Book Club. The current schedule features British Chief Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks; Tel Aviv Chief Rabbi Meir Lau; Malcolm Gladwell, author of The Tipping Point; Elie Wiesel; and retired Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor. In academics, the school’s Math team, which featured three students who ﬁnished in the top 50 across Long Island, will also ﬁeld players in the MSG Varsity televised Quiz Bowl Challenge. IN sports, the school features a Two-Handed Touch Football Intramural League, 4-Corner Dodgeball tournament, Homerun Derby Challenge, and the Annual 3-on-3 February Madness Spectacular. Student feedback led to the creation of new courses, including Business Management, Introduction to Law, Business Math, and Forensics.

www.thebrandeisschool.org Grades: PreK-8 The inclusive day school is starting off the school year with a combination of Jewish cultural and academically rigorous programming. In Jewish education, the students are partnering with community organizations in a holocaust shoe project, supporting the IDF, and walking in support of breast cancer research. In academics, the entire seventh grade scored 3s and 4s on both the state ELA reading and math tests. The results greatly exceeded the scores of public schools in the districts of Hewlett-Woodmere and Lawrence. Brandeis was recently recognized by the UJA-Federation for promoting strong bonds with Israel among its students and their parents through its Long Island Jerusalem Project. Elementary School 16 Cherry Lane Great Neck, NY 10024 Tel: 516-487-8694 Grades 1-5 The 660-student school shares its facility with the Cherry Lane Minyan, a postmodern facility designed by offers a learning center for students in need of extra academic support, with one-on-one tutoring offered after classes. The school’s aim is to develop a love for learning in each student. We encourage them to become enthusiastic, independent learners. The school’s ﬁve-point mission involves a Torah-based worldview; a love for the Torah, the nation of Israel, and the land of Israel; the ability for independent study, encouraging individuality, and cultivating the talents of each student; high standards of general studies; and proﬁciency in Hebrew language instruction. North Shore Hebrew Academy offers wonderful chesed and holiday programs designed to enhance our students’ learning experiences. Under the Sam Aharonoff Memorial Shivtei Torah Campaign of 2009, 14 local synagogues have contributed to writing 12 Torah scrolls for NSHA with additional funds used for scholarships.

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Continued from page 8 North Shore Hebrew Academy Middle School 26 Old Mill Road Great Neck, NY 10024 Tel: 516-487-9163 Grades 6-8 This 250-student school located within the Great Neck Synagogue, includes a swimming pool. The Judaic Studies program is taught in Hebrew. The goal is to encourage learning through textual skills and encouragement of questions. Extracurricular programs include mishmar, drama, basketball and hockey. Students are required to participate in the annual Celebrate Israel Parade in Manhattan. Trips vary by grade with a sixth grade day trip to New York City, an overnight seventh grade trip to Boston, and a three-day senior trip to Washington. The “Hands on Mitzvah” program encourages students to focus on various mitzvot as they study for their bar/bat mitzvah. The yearly cycle mitzvot include lessons on the shofar, tzizit/challah, and havdalah making. The students then take home the tangible element of the mitzvah they have worked on.

North Shore Hebrew Academy High School 400 North Service Road Great Neck, NY 11020 Tel: 516-487-2424 www.nshahs.org Grades: 9-12 Entering its 10th year, the high school takes pride in securing first place and finalist spots in national competitions, including the CocaCola Scholars Program and the National Merit Scholarship Competition. In the past year, a pair of NSHA students secured a semifinalist position at the prestigious Intel Science Talent Search. All classrooms are equipped with smart boards and wireless access. In response to recent events, the security of students is recognized with a fingerprint background check for all staff employed by the school.

Among its 56 student organizations, unique offerings include an aviation club that teaches an accredited class Introduction to Aviation. The Math Club chooses a team to compete in the Nassau County Interscholastic Math League. The Chess Club competes in the Metropolitan Yeshiva Chess League. NSHA takes a strong commitment towards Israel, participating parades, pro-Israel rallies, letter-writing campaigns, and the annual March of the Living. The school has a public open house on Sun. Oct 30 from 10 a.m. to 1p.m.

baton at Camp Bay Kayta, a sophomore preselichot Shabbaton, and a Yeshiva Shabbaton at Kutsher’s. Another new hire is Rabbi Efraim Polakoff as the Assistant Rebbe. A state-of-the-art computer system will give parents and students online accounts on report cards and grades. 50 brand new computers have been installed with programs such as Edmodo, Voicethread, and GoogleDocs to enhance the educational experience.

tuition assistance, as well as fees for the Simcha Day Camp, which is run by the yeshiva.

MANHATTAN Yeshiva University High School for Boys “MTA High School” 2540 Amsterdam Avenue New York, NY, 10033 Tel: 212-960-5337 www.yuhsb.org Grades 9-12 The famed 310-student uptown yeshiva offers a combination of advanced Torah study and high-level science programming this year, led by menahel Rabbi Michael Taubes, and General Studies Principal Dr. Seth Taylor. The masmidim program includes a weekly lecture by a RIETS rosh yeshiva, an additional night seder each week, incentives for more nighttime learning, and several day trips. In the sciences, the school was recently chosen by the Center for Initiatives in Jewish Education to participate in new high school scientiﬁc engineering courses developed by the Israel Sci-Tech Network (formerly ORT). A small group of applicants from the incoming sophomore class will participate in the program will enjoy an accelerated curriculum rich in laboratory and work-based experiences, simulated laboratory experiments and multimedia activities. Electronics, robotics and medical engineering will be covered as well. In literature, the school is expanding its “Meet the Israeli Author—A Workshop in Creative Writing,” an innovative project begun last year in which a renowned Israeli author mentors the students in developing Hebrewlanguage creative writing skills. In athletics and intellect the school seeks to retain its leading status in Torah Bowl Championship, Varsity Hockey Championship, and V’ata Banim Shiru competition. The high school also has a niche in journalism, having secured a ﬁrst-place award from the American Scholastic Press Association for the school

QUEENS Yeshiva Darchei Torah

SKA High School For Girls 291 Meadowview Avenue Hewlett Bay Park, NY 11557 Tel: 516-374-7195 Grades 9-12 www.halb.org The 297-student school welcomes its largest freshman class of 97 students with renovations to handle the growing student body. This year’s new academic offerings include a Scientiﬁc Engineering course sponsored by the Gruss CIJES. This two-year course of study will focus on engineering and biotechnology. Ninth graders compete every year in the Gruss Gildor International Science Competition. The Beit Medrash program offers indepth study of Limudei Kodesh subjects. This year, SKA will be expanding tech training for its faculty with the Jewish Educational Project Grant for Digital Learning.

DRS Yeshiva High School for Boys 700 Ibsen Street Woodmere, NY 11598 Tel: 516-295-7700 www.halb.org The 320-student yeshiva welcomes new General Studies Principal Dr. Gerald Kirshenbaum, and Natan Farber as Associate Director of Student Life. Farber will join Rabbi Eli Brazil our Director of Student Activities to promote the wide variety of extracurricular activities, which will include pre-school barbecues for sophomores and juniors, a freshman Shab-

257 Beach 17 Street Far Rockaway, NY 11691 Tel. 718-868-2300 Grades: PreK-12 The sizable 1,600-student full-service yeshiva recently completed its 186,000 square foot expansion building, securing its role as a leading Torah learning institution in the Five Towns region. In the secular sense, the new facility gives elementary school students stateof-the-art science labs and computer centers, with an Enrichment Program for talented students. The middle school is a participant in the Excellence 2000 (E2K) program sponsored by the Center for Initiatives in Jewish Education, where students engage in fun and creative math and science problem solving. YDT’s competitive reputation includes annual participation in the Gildor Project, where it was a 2009 finalist, and the Math Olympiad for boys yeshivas, where YDT scored a seventh grade first place and eighth grade second place last March. For students who are unable to secure a full-fledged Regents exam curriculum, YDT offers the Weiss Vocational Program. For adults, YDT offers a continuing education department and a kollel. The rosh yeshiva, Rabbi Yaakov Bender, is well known for paying close attention to students, delivering a weekly shmuess to each of the grades. Under the “Rabbi’s Fund,” the school generously assists parents in need of

Continued on page 10

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THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

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BACK TO SCHOOL GUIDE Continued from page 9 newspaper, The Academy News.

HIGHER EDUCATION CUNY Queens College 65-30 Kissena Boulevard Flushing, NY Tel. 718-997-5000 Student body: 12,000 www.qc.cuny.edu The picturesque campus was recently rated as one of the top in the country in diversity and student interaction. While student organizations represent a wide variety of ideas and backgrounds, and its new dormitories contribute to a traditional college setting, do not expect heavy drinking. The Princeton Review rated the college as the 15th in the “stone-cold sober” category. The college’s recent academic honors include a $3,85 million federal grant, where the college’s Queens Clinical Center for Excellence, which is partnering with Long Island Jewish Medical Center in providing medical and mental health assistance to 9/11 responders.

CUNY Queensborough Community College 222-05 56th Avenue Bayside, NY Tel. 718-631-6682 www.qcc.cuny.edu Student body: 15,000 The Holocaust Resource Center and Archives, located in a $5.5 million postmodern facility, serves as a go-to place in Queens for research on the holocaust, led by Dr. Arthur Flug. The exhibits provide universal themes that resonate with students of all backgrounds. As an example, this month’s exhibit, “Come from the Shadows,” is on the Japanese wartime mistreatment of women in Korea. Besides this center, the campus also hosts an art gallery. This year’s cultural academic offerings include a new degree program in

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gallery and museum studies, for students interested in conservation and curatorial work. The program works in tandem with the art history program at Queens College. Other unique academic programs include the dual/joint program in biotechnology with York College and the massage therapy program, which no other college in the city offers. The campus Hillel often coordinates events with Emet, an outreach organization serving Bukharian Jewish students.

Hofstra University Hempstead, NY 11549 Tel. 516-463-6600 www.hofstra.edu This 12,000-student institution offers around 140 undergraduate options and more than 100 dual degree programs, attracting students from 46 states and territories and 68 countries. This year’s new academic offerings include an MFA in Creative Writing, a new online MBA, and a Masters in Forensic Linguistics directed by Robert Leonard, a noted consultant on linguistics in the legal system who previously taught at Columbia University. In graduate offerings, Hofstra partnered this summer with the North Shore-LIJ School of Medicine, giving students clinical experience from the beginning of their studies, training a new generation of patient-centered physicians. Hofstra also plans to launch a School of Engineering and Applied Science in Fall 2012 that will emphasize high-tech research, practical experience and interdisciplinary study.

Yeshiva University 500 West 185th Street New York, NY 10033 Tel. 212-960-5488 www.yu.edu The Syms School of Business is promoting Dr. Moses Pava, a professor of business ethics, as the new director of the Syms School. Professor Michael Strauss, the entrepreneurin-residence and clinical professor of management, has been appointed associate director of student advising and administration. Dr. Avi

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Touro College Division of Graduate Studies 23-27 West 23 Street New York, NY 10010 Tel. 212-463-0400 www.touro.edu In response to a national shortfall of some 280,000 qualified math and science teachers, Touro College is now offering a Masters degree in mathematics education leading to a professional certification. This new degree program is designed for individuals already holding initial New York State Teacher Certification in Adolescent Mathematics or who still need a related master’s degree in order to convert this first level initial certification to the higher-level professional certification required by the state. The 18-month part-time program suits students who are working or have families, with weekly evening courses at Touro’s Manhattan campus. Another new offering at the 4,000-student graduate school is a Masters in Teaching Students with Disabilities. This degree addresses a growing need for trained special education teachers across the state. The program prepares teachers to work with disabled students across subject areas and disciplines at the grade 7-12 level. . Graduates can teach as coteachers, consulting teachers, and resource room teachers. With additional course work, graduates can also teach as head teachers. For students interested in designing apps and websites, the graduate school offers a Masters in web and multimedia design. The new courses offer concentrations in animation and interface design—the design of the software that allows people to use and interact with computers, cell phones and other mobile communications devices. Students who graduate from the program will have the ability to work in fields including web design and programming, game design, online curricula and testing, animation, online advertising, and programming for mobile devices.

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Giloni has been appointed as associate director for academic research of Syms. Azrieli Graduate School of Jewish Education is launching a new program within its School Partnership Master’s Program. The initiative offers classes over ﬁve semesters to educators who wish to pursue a master’s degree in Jewish education while continuing in their teaching careers. The inaugural cohort is comprised of 16 participants, who currently teach at yeshiva day schools in the Five Towns and Long Island. With support from Legacy Heritage Fund Limited, 17 young teachers from YU will participate in a two-year training fellowship that provides support and mentorship within their host school, in addition to conferences, webinars and check-ins with staff at Azrieli throughout the academic year. Over three summers, teaching fellows will also earn a master of science in education at Azrieli through a full-tuition scholarship. Three additional teachers will be sponsored through the GiveBack Fellowship, which assists in school programming. Last month, the Revel Graduate School of Jewish Studies hosted dozens of leading international scholars to share research on a broad array of topics within Jewish studies as part of a conference on “Israel and the Nations: Visions and Reality.” This month also included a historic milestone with Shana Strauch Schick, the ﬁrst owman to receive a doctorate in Talmud. Dean David Berger notes that 40 percent of students in the PhD program at Revel are women, dispersed among disciplines such as Sephardic studies, modern Jewish philosophy, Jewish mysticism, Second Temple history, medieval Jewry, the Jews of early modern Europe, and modern Central and Eastern European Jewry. On Aug. 31, Sen. Joseph Lieberman will be opening up the Zahava and Moshael Straus Center for Torah and Western Thought, with a discussion on religion and democracy. In a public one-on-one with Rabbi Dr. Meir Soloveichik, the senator will speak on his new book, The Gift of Rest: Rediscovering the Beauty of the

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August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

By Ariel Rosenbloom

What do you like about Shabbos? “I get to hang out with my cousins and play MahJong.”

RACHEL KUPFER manager at “Lulu’s Gallery of Gifts” Cedarhurst

“It’s a spiritual release from the physical world.”

JOSH DEAL nursing home payroll manager, Far Rockaway “Sleeping, spending time with my family and learning Torah.”

“Reading”

THE LEGENDARY DANNY O’DOUL Singer, Columnist, Inventor of the O’Doul Auto Timing Chip Woodmere “Family”

“I get to drink a lot of soda and see my baby brother, play with friends. I’m a Jew. It’s special.” YISRAEL, BREINDUY AND AHUVA GREENGAR, AND CHESKY ROSENGARTEN students Torah Prep/Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island St. Louis/Far Rockaway

AVIVA MANSBACH AND SHEVY DAAR S.K.A. graduates Lawrence/Woodmere

MARLA HOROWITZ social worker Scarsdale

Opinion Objections overruled: Torah is relevant, credible, and fresh

he three most common objections raised by lawyers in court include “relevance”, “hearsay”, and “asked and answered.” They are used so often, one often sees them in books and movies. What are these objections? And what, if anything, do they have to do with Jewish LAWYER’S BRIEF learning? The objection of relevance is used when the testimony being presented is so off topic that it lacks usefulness. Hearsay is an out of court, third party statement, where the credibility is in question. Lawyers will argue “asked and answered” when the same testimony is being preEvan W. Klesztick sented over and over again, bringing absolutely nothing fresh to the table. Our children often raise these objections

every day, often unconsciously. Take the question “Why are we learning ancient Talmud? What does it have to do with the real world? This could just as easily have been stated “objection, relevance” Or how about the often asked, “How do we know that the stories, and the Medrashim, are really true?” Doesn’t that sound like “objection, hearsay?” Finally, “I’ve heard this all before” seems to be the common refrain of all students regardless of age, race or religion. They just as easily could have said “but teacher, that’s been asked and answered!” This thought came to my mind as I was in court last week on trial. My client, the owner of a trash removal company was being sued. It was alleged that one of his five trucks damaged a parked car and then fled the scene. The plaintiff did not have my client’s license plate, and so my client was refusing to pay. During a break, I tried explaining to my client that the plaintiff was able to identify the truck, the location of the loss, and manner that the accident occurred. “Don’t you get it?” I felt tike saying. Who cares about the license plate, your vehicle has identifying

marks- it has a “siman!” In that instant, I was no longer in the courtroom. I was back in shiur and the debate was on regarding what constitutes an identifying mark, a “siman.” Is it the nature of the item, the location of where it is found, or the manner of how it was placed on the ground, or all three? That Gemarah may have been written thousands of years ago, in ancient Babylon, but it was playing itself out in a Brooklyn courtroom in 2011, and at that moment, nothing could have been more relevant in the entire world! Lets turn to the hearsay issue. My Irish partner recently told me how many thousands of different variations there are to the King James Bible. That did not impress him. “I tell you what floored me” he remarked one day. “I was watching the History Channel as they did a piece on Torah scrolls from across the globe. They compared ten Torahs written in different countries over 500 years. They were exact duplicates, “word for word, and letter for letter!” He then looked at me and asked, “How do you explain this?” What he was really saying, “Your Torahs have credibility. There are no hearsay objections. ” Which leads me to the final point of “re-

runs.” Most people don’t like watching them. Been there, done that. Which is why the Gemarah goes out of its way to make sure that every lesson, or “limud” is novel, or fresh. The Gemarah never teaches two things from same verse. The other day, my five year old asked me to teach him numbers. He was so excited, he was literally jumping off the couch. That is the effect wisdom should always have on people. As we gear up to return to the coming school year, whether as teachers or parents, we must keep in mind that there is a battle taking place in the courtrooms of our children’s minds. It is no longer just “kids at risk,” it is now “Judaism at risk.” It is therefore imperative that we ourselves believe in the relevance, the credibility and the freshness of Jewish values. Only then, can we be strong enough advocates to pass it on to others. Evan W. Klestzick, Esq. is a Senior Partner at McDonnell & Adels, PLLC, specializing in insurance law. He has been a guest lecturer at Manhattan College as well as CLE courses podcasts on the topic of insurance fraud. He is a resident of Far Rockaway.

THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

Mensch on the street

12 August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

The Rohr Jewish Learning Institute awards Nesenoff

ON THE

On Aug 18 as 1,000 gathered in the Hyatt Ballroom in Greenwich Ct, Rabbi Hesh Epstein presented David Nesenoff with the National Jewish Hero award at the JLI Retreat. A short video was ﬁrst presented detailing Nesenoff’s, and his son Adam’s, trek to the White House in the spring of 2010 and the aftermath of their now famous Helen Thomas interview. “I always thought I would make a two hour ﬁlm, show it to thousands of people and win an Oscar.” Nesenoff said. “Instead, I made a one minute video, tens of millions saw it throughout the world, it helped Israel and I receive an award from Chabad JLI, an organization that I hold dearest. I have gone beyond my dream.”

Photo courtesy of JLI National Retreat

Calendar Submit your shul or organization’s events or shiurim to jscalendar@thejewishstar.com. Deadline is Wednesday of the week prior to publication.

Aug. 28

Lido annual barbecue LIDO BEACH SYNAGOGUE, located at Lido Boulevard and Fairway Road in Lido Beach, is holding its annual barbecue with a DJ playing music and a petting zoo for children. The event begins at 4:30 p.m. For more information, contact 516-889-9650.

a music, art and wine event highlighting musical performances and artworks designed by members and friends of the synagogue. The event begins at 9:30 p.m. For more information, contact 516-889-9650.

Sept. 13-15 Nesenoff film premiere

Aug. 29 Fore! Our youth

MADRAIGOS, the nonprofit that helps local teens handle life’s challenges, is holding its golf and tennis benefit at Fresh Meadow Country Club, located at 255 Lakeville Road in Lake Success. The rates for golf is $500, tennis is $250, and dinner is $150, covering breakfast, lunch, dinner, and other services related to the event. For more information and sponsorship of this event, visit www.forethem.org or contact Rabbi Josh Zern at 516-371-3250 ext. 5.

SIMON WIESENTHAL CENTER, will be showing a film by The Jewish Star’s publisher David F. Nesenoff at its Museum of Tolerance, located at 226 East 42 Street in Manhattan. The film “Three Thousand Miles” documents Nesenoff’s travels across the county discussing the topic of anti-Semitism. The screenings will be on Sept. 13, 14, and 15 at 6:30 p.m. To reserve your free seat, contact 3kmilesmovie@gmail.com or contact David F. Nesenoff at dnesenoff@thejewishstar.com

Ongoing

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Aug. 30

Ohr Torah blood drive CONGREGATION OHR TORAH, located at Congregation Ohr Torah will be hosting a blood drive 410 Hungry Harbor Road in North Woodmere is holding a blood drive to benefit local hospitals. The event will take place from 3:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. in the Gold Room of the synagogue. For more information, contact OhrTorahBloodDrive@gmail.com Photo by Jerry Meyer Studio

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Aug 31

Religion and democracy YESHIVA UNIVERSITY, located at 2540 Amsterdam Avenue in Manhattan, is hosting Sen. Joseph Lieberman in a discussion with Rabbi Dr. Meir Soloveichik on the topic of religion and democracy, his historic political career and his new book, “The Gift of Rest: Rediscovering the Beauty of the Sabbath” in a wide-ranging, one-on-one conversation. The free public event will begin at 6:30 p.m. in the Lamport Auditorium. It is the first in a series of “Great Conversations on Religion and Democracy.” For more information, contact 212-960-5488

Sept. 3

Music, Art and Wine LIDO BEACH SYNAGOGUE, located at Lido Boulevard and Fairway Road in Lido Beach, is holding

SAMUEL FIELD YM-YWHA is offering Project Child, an after-school program for children ages 5-15 with ADD, ADHD, Asperger’s syndrome, learning disabilities, and high-functioning within the Autism Spectrum. This program operates during the school year at the Bay Terrace Center, located at 212-00 23rd Avenue in Bayside. Homework help and snack are provided daily, as well as educational and recreational activities. Events are held daily from 2:30 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. during the school year. For fees, registration and more information, contact Meredith Zylberberg at 718423-6111 ext. 228 or MZylberberg@sfy.org

Roslyn Gemara class ROSLYN SYNAGOGUE, located at 257 Garden Street in Roslyn Heights, conducts weekly a weekly analysis and study of Tractate Sukkah, open to experienced learners and beginners. The class discusses the mitzvoth of the Sukkot festival and how it was celebrated in ancient times. The class is held each Tuesday from 8:15 p.m. to 9:15 p.m. For more information, contact 516-484-0697.

Great Neck Sisterhood “Flower Power Fundraising” GREAT NECK SYNAGOGUE, located at 26 Old Mill Road in Great Neck has an account with Flower Power Fundraising and encourages the public to place orders at flowerpowerfundraising. com under the name “Sisterhood of Great Neck Synagogue.” 50 percent of every purchase on this website foes to synagogue’s sisterhood. For more information, contact 516-487-6100.

Great Neck Dunkin now kosher The new Dunkin Donuts at the corner of Brokaw and Middle Neck Road in Great Neck is open under the supervision of the Vaad Harabonim of Queens. The Great Neck Synagogue extends special gratitude to Rebbetzin Ellen Polakoff who facilitated much of that communication behind the scenes. The community is encouraged to support this new kosher outpost of the global donut chain.

13 THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

The Kosher Bookworm

Women bench too

o, this is not about some politically correct feminist work. “Shaarei Simcha” [Ktav Publishing House.2007] is a delightful carefully researched and comprehensive prayer guide and bencher for every English speaking Jewish household. Edited by Rivka Haut, a longtime agunah activist and noted Torah scholar Dr. Adena Berkowitz, this work includes Birkat Hamazon that while adhering to halachah is sensitive to the religious needs of many groups – Ashkenazim, Sephardim, women, baalei teshuva, as well as people with children and those without. While not the pop artistic work as are other less comprehensive benchers, this work is unique in the nature of its content and the maturity of its commentary. According to Rivka Haut, “We were aware that there are many Alan Jay Gerber benchers available with beautiful graphics and illustrations. Our focus, however, was going to be on the text. We wanted to provide scholarly sources along with popular explanations and background discussions of various prayers and blessings connected with Shabbos and holidays. We felt it important to reintroduce techinot and customs that many might be unfamiliar with.” Several examples of this will constitute the bulk of this review. Included in this work is a blessing that a

wife may recite for her husband as a parallel to Eishes Chayil which is an adaptation from Aneini by Rabbi Nachman Bulman, zt”l, techinot for separating challah, and two candle lighting in both Yiddish and English. The Havdalah service includes optional readings of Miriam’s Well and Miriam HaN’viyah in Hebrew and the classic Yiddish pizmon, Gott Fuhn Avraham. Also to be found is a special and sensitive parent’s prayer under the chuppah that was written by Tziporah Halivni, a Holocaust survivor, thus enabling both parents to actively participate in the wedding ceremony. Other unique additions to the bencher content include a welcoming ceremony for adopted children, as well as a simchat habat for both natural born and adopted daughters, a ritual equivalent to a shalom zachar. With the festival of Sukkos ‘just around the corner’ I found one very special innovation most intriguing ,that being the Ushpizim ritual which was utilized to include the Ushpizot, Sarah, Rivkah, Rachel, Leah, Miriam, Chana, Aviga’el, and Esther. According to Dr. Berkowitz, in a detailed email reply to this issue: “We researched the precedents for welcoming female ancestors into the sukkah. There are contemporary sources that reference ‘ushpizot’ in the non-Orthodox world as well as Orthodox sources including Rabbi Shlomo Riskin’s bencher. We wanted to help make women feel welcome in the sukkah; being aware that while in past generations many women did not avail themselves of sitting in a sukkah, today many more women have taken this mitzvah upon themselves. We felt what better role model but to provide

a parallel version. We consulted several leading Aramaic scholars who assisted us with the male and female grammar. We based the women we included on the ‘seven niviot’ we find elsewhere. Given that this is not a fixed text, it afforded the addition of a parallel additional text and creativity in who to include.” Readers of this column may find several aspects of this work under review problematic in terms of halacha, especially as they concern the inclusion of a zimmun for women. To this matter the authors were quite forthcoming in defending this inclusion citing both the Rosh and the Vilna Gaon who obligated women to participate in”women only” zimmunim, while other authorities, according to the authors, permitted this. Much more on this and other halachic issues are discussed in greater detail in this book’s extensive introduction including detailed citations by Rabbi Aharon Ziegler whose sourcing of Rav Joseph B. Soloveitchik’s opinions on this and related issues will be of great interest to you. Other aspects of this introduction should also merit your careful attention. There is much to be learned from these pages.

Opinion The appropriate response to sexual misconduct in our schools

Training rabbis to identify abuse Last month, 15 secular newspapers throughout Canada reported on a historic psak din issued by Montreal’s Beth Din of the Vaad Ha’ir urging parents to teach their children about inappropriate touching. Issued right before the camp season, the respected rabbinic court advised parents to explain to their children that it is mandatory to report such acts of sexual abuse to a parent, rabbi, or an adult figure they trust, such as a school teacher or principal. Around the same time, Rabbi Shmuel Kamenetsky, who Dr. Amy Neustein serves as vice president of Agudath Yisroel and rosh yeshivah of Yeshiva Gedolah of Philadelphia, spoke to an attentive audience at the Shiurei Torah Conference in Flatbush about the importance of reporting sexual abuse to

a rabbi who would decide if the charge meets the “threshold” for contacting the police or local prosecutor. The Vaad Ha’ir and Agudath Yisroel hold a strong voice in the religious community, taking a courageous first-step in placing child sexual abuse awareness as a front and center issue. Yet, the child advocates in Canada and the United States who praised these institutions for bringing a taboo issue into an open forum did not spare them harsh criticism for not mentioning that sexual abuse crimes must be reported to the proper secular authorities. We must ask ourselves if our rabbis are not trained to perform a forensic evaluation of the evidence at hand, how can they be asked to determine which complaints of sexual abuse warrant reporting to authorities and which ones do not? I recently spoke with one rabbi about a father who would prolong the diaper changes so that he could have the chance to touch his young daughter inappropriately, the rabbi blurted out “what harm is there to such a young child?” This rabbi’s naïve and shoot from the hip response

belied an entire body of psychology literature on the deleterious effects of child sexual abuse, even in very young children. Thus, we are left with a rather perplexing Hobson’s choice: reporting abuse to rav, who may or may not have the proper education and training to evaluate the psychological/physical danger of abuse. If he does not have sufficient training, he will summarily dismiss the charge. If he does have sufficient knowledge of the traumatic effects of abuse, including the whole range of psychiatric sequelae, such as depression, self-mutilation, low self-esteem, anorexia, suicidal ideation and behavior, that results from abuse, can he properly invoke halachic proscriptions against committing messirah, or any other suitable halachic premise for that matter, to determine if reporting abuse is a viable option? To some the answer is obvious: don’t take up sex abuse with the rav. To others it is more nuanced. Can one truly expect a parent whose child reveals shocking details of his/her teacher’s inappropriate touching, or worse, to avoid seeking halachic advice

when that same parent has routinely sought the advice of his/her rav on matters much less serious? Should the distressed parent of an abused child be met with a summary dismissal by the rabbi: “I’m sorry but when it comes to matters of child sexual abuse I must desist in helping you.” What this dilemma shows is that while major ultra-Orthodox institutions have taken the courageous first step in making parents aware of the importance of talking to their children about sexual abuse, there is a pressing need for a coordinated and thought out plan on how to respond to a parent whose child may have been abused. There is no easy solution. But we must try to find our way out of the forest of confusion so that halacha, which underscores our everyday life will not be placed at the other end of the room. Dr. Neustein is a sociologist and editor of “Tempest in the Temple: Jewish Communities and Child Sex Scandals,” and “Unschooled in Child Safety: Major Jewish Institutions in the United States and Canada Address Sexual Abuse Unawareness – A Thorny First Step”

August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR

Ask Aviva

Refereeing mom & dad Dear Aviva, I’m 14 years-old and my parents are crazy. They cannot get along and are always fighting with each other. I don’t care when they fight. I only care when they bring me into it. Sometimes it’s just a tiny thing like if I was with my mom when she was buying something and my dad wanted something else, and he gets mad that she didn’t get what he wanted. Then my mom will call me in to prove to my dad that the store didn’t have what he wanted. I hate it. I really hate it and want them to leave me out of it. Can you tell me how to get them to stop? -Judge Judy

Dear Judge Judy, You’ve definitely judged this situation correctly--you should not be the one who has to get in between your parents. This is not fair to you, and not healthy for your parents. I think we should make a plan of DDR, Discuss, Discuss and Resist. ■ #1-Discuss. Wait for a time of peace and calm when you are alone with one of your parents. If there is never a time of peace and calm, then let one of your parents know that you want to talk about something privately. Tell your parent that you are a kid and need to stay a kid and when your parents bring you into their disagreements, it is not letting you be a kid. Give examples. Ask your parent to please leave you out of it next time. ■#2-Discuss. Repeat this step with the

other parent. It’s essential that you do this with both parents, even if you think that one of them wouldn’t get it. So muster up the guts and make sure both of your parents hear this message. ■#3-Resist. Now comes the hardest part. When your parents are going at it and try to bring you in, resist it. The first few times will be the hardest. But this is when your message to them will be the clearest. If you are able to resist getting involved in the midst of the moment, they will get that you are serious. You will be surprised how they will not push you more if you say, “I’m not getting involved” when they call you. The more you say it, the more they will get it. And try to say it with a calm tone each time. If they do try to pull you in even when you do a good job resisting, you can always use the old Voting Rights/Drafting Age argument. Basically, the voting age in America used to be 21. But young 18 year-olds were being drafted into the army and sent off to war to risk their lives. So some argued that it isn’t right to not let the 18, 19 and 20 yearolds have a say in how the country runs, but still risk their lives for their country. So they lowered the voting age to 18. Applied to you: Your parents ask you to step up and help adults solve something. You should have another adult right, like the right to opt out of it. The right to say, “I’d rather not get involved.” Once you properly resist, your parents’ fight may worsen. That’s most definitely not

your fault. Now they have to face the fire that they’ve started without you. They’re not used to facing it without you, but just keep doing what you’re doing and stand your ground. By the way, your parents most likely didn’t start off their relationship fighting. There may be a time that you can remember when things weren’t like this. Or it may be that it was like this for as long as you can remember. Something for you to keep in mind for the future is to try to have a bicker-free marriage. How? When you are newly married and you

start to get annoyed with your husband, nip it in the bud. Real marriage gets annoying and hard at times. That is your marriage telling you “Ok, we need to work harder at this.” And remember—there are only two people in a marriage. -Aviva Aviva Rizel is a Marriage and Family Therapist in private practice that can be reached at 347-292-8482 or AvivaRizel.MFT@gmail. com.

Opinion TXTG, OMG!

MG it is the year 2011 and technology has gone to the limits. If you do not text, tweet, email, IM, own an iPod, iPhone, Blackberry, or Facebook profile, you better get on it my friends. BTW (by the way) your BFF (best friend forever) can reach you by TXT (text) or EM (e-mail). We use special text message/chat shorthand to communicate with friends, co-workers and family. With Google, I printed out 22 pages worth of these abbreviations and I am waiting for the IN MY VIEW day when Merriam Webster’s Dictionary will consist of only text message/ chat abbreviations, and the Scrabble board will accept them into the game. TXTG started out as a “thing” for kids and teens. I think it is AWESO (awesome) that adults are now speaking the same code. I feel like a kid on a merry go round – enjoying the ride and grabbing the gold ring. Every morning, I TXT my granddaughters before their school begin. “Good morning merry sunshine. Have a gr8 day. Xxxooo.” I love it even more when they answer. Rebbetzin I send messages to family and friends Mimi Mehlman knowing that if they are busy at the time they will pick up the TXT message faster than answering the phone. In my profession as a social worker, EM has its benefits. My clients are caregivers and are busy with everyday responsibilities. I find that I can communicate with them easier through EM. I am able to stay in touch with those who live a distance by EM – not having to worry what time it is where they are. They can receive news from my end any time of day. Even

Photo by David F. Nesenoff

locally to EM or TXT “Just to say Hi” is pretty cool. One can also “delete” what they do not want to read. EM and TXT to a Blackberry are received instantly. I should own a Blackberry so that I can BBM my grandchildren who are studying

in Israel. There are, however, drawbacks to TXTG. I was at recent sheva brachot and while the rabbi was speaking to the bride and to the groom, the bride was busy TXTG under the table, demonstrating a lack of derech eretz. TXTG could be hurtful. I heard a story the other day about a couple breaking up without even speaking to one another via a TX message. How heartless. In school, students can sit and TXT, disrupting their concentration when they should be focusing on the lesson. TXTG could be socially harmful; if one does not know how to share one’s thoughts through TXTG they may become a social outcast. TXTG could be a physical danger when someone is texting and driving. Am I wrong to think that it is rude for people to text one another while at the sitting at the same table with someone else? Texting offers a safe haven for certain individuals. It means not having to “face “the person with whom you need to speak, a typed up exemption from “verbal” personal communication. With the technology we have lost something. We have lost that “personal” interaction, depersonalizing our society. We have lost the art of “speaking” to one another. I like when I call on the phone and the other party will say to me “It’s good to hear your voice.” In life there are always “pros” and “cons.” Let us enjoy both sides of the coin – the technology of the present in addition to the personal interaction that is so necessary to all of us as human beings. Everything in moderation. Communication is just that – communication. Each method of communication suits different needs, and each one on an individual basis needs to determine their respective needs. TXTG in itself isn’t bad or good. It is how we use it. B4N (bye for now) Mimi Mehlman, MSW, lives in Lido Beach, where her husband, Rabbi Daniel Mehlman leads the Lido Beach Synagogue.

15 THE JEWISH STAR August 26, 2011 • 26 AV, 5771

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MERCHANDISE MART

ANTIQUE LOVERS TAKE NOTE BRIMFIELD, MA 5,000 Dealers of Antiques & Collectibles. Visit www.brimfield.com For info on 20 individual show openings. Sept. 6- 11, 2011

Miscellaneous For Sale HAS YOUR BUILDING SHIFTED OR SETTLED? Contact Woodford Brothers Inc, for straightening, leveling, foundation and wood frame repairs at 1-800-OLDBARN. www.woodfordbros.com. Suffolk Cty~ License #41959-H Nassau Cty~ License #H18G7160000

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JEWISH STAR For information on rates and coverage, contact our Legals Dept. at 516-569-4000.

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Antiques/Collectibles

September 13, 14 and 15, 2011 6:30 pm LIMITED SEATING Free Admission must RSVP:

3kmilesmovie@gmail.com

FILM PREMIERE

Simon Wiesenthal Center Museum of Tolerance New York 226 East 42nd Street New York, NY 10017 (42nd Street at 2nd Avenue)

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August 26, 2011 â&#x20AC;˘ 26 AV, 5771 THE JEWISH STAR