The Courier - Edition 189 by TKO UK

Edition 189

www.thecourier.es

Friday, October 3, 2014

PLEASE MR. POSTMAN...

...If there’s a letter in your bag for me, can I get it at home? By ALEX TRELINSKI and TONY MAYES Around 100 Orihuela Costa residents braved last Saturday’s bad weather to take to the streets of Playa Flamenca to protest against the removal of direct door postal deliveries to large parts of the area. From the beginning of September, people living in La R e g i a , Campoamor, Cabo Roig, and La Zenia have had to travel to Playa Flamenca to pick up their post if they are not part of a community mail box arrangement. Representatives from the major local political parties and local community groups gathered outside the Correos office in Playa Flamenca to vent their anger and concern over the cutbacks as well as fears that more restrictions may be in the pipeline across a wider area.

The acting Mayor of Orihuela, Antonio Zapata, said he had come to show solidarity with the people affected by the measure saying:- “They pay taxes like anybody else and have the right to quality services”. Zapata added that prompted by CLARO councillor, Bob Houliston and coastal councillor, Martina Scheurer, Orihuela Town Hall had embarked on legal action a g a i n s t Correos to r e v e r s e S e p t e m b e r ’s changes. In a statement, CLARO said: "The need for possibly thousands of residents to go weekly to the Playa Flamenca post office to collect their mail before it is returned to the central post office is causing considerable inconvenience. There is no justified reason for curtailing home deliveries in an integrated urban area like the Orihuela Costa which is a city in itself with 35,000 registered residents, equal to the population of Orihuela City.”

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Friday, October 3, 2014

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E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE C/ Luis Canovas Martinez 03183 Torrevieja Phone: 966 921 003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1630 EDITOR Alex Trelinski LAYOUT & DESIGN James Bone ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265

Picture of the Week

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“Flowering Cacti”

PUIG POPS IN MIXED BLESSINGS

Writers Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

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Publication Published by TKO Media and Entertainment S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A - 188 - 2014 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for any readers letters or claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features. Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or nonappearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re-publication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

Photo by John Stevens

The socialist opposition leader in the Valencian Parliament, Ximo Puig, has been to check out the state of the Príncipe de España school in Rojales, just days after the Valencian President, Alberto Fabra, made the surprise announcement that funds would be made available to improve the facilities. Fabra also pledged renovations to schools in Torrevieja, Guardamar, and San Fulgencio. Representatives from the school and the council are due to meet representatives from the Valencian Education Department in Valencia City as part of their long-standing campaign to upgrade the 50 year old building which has created all kinds of major health and safety issues. Ximo Puig said he was shocked by the condition of the Rojales building during his visit on Monday adding that it was in one of the most poorest states of any school building that he has seen in the Valencia region. He pledged his party’s support in making sure that President Fabra’s pledge comes to fruition, adding that the leader’s word could not be trusted.

The Costa Blanca and Murcia areas have had more rain in the last ten days than in the first eight months of the year put together, according to the meteorological agency, Aemet, in Valencia. The severity of the drought in 2014 was described by Aemet as being akin to something from the Sahara. Before the storms started nearly a fortnight ago, Torrevieja had got the most rainfall of 23 litres on the Costa Blanca, whilst in the north, Calpe got only 8.6 litres, and El Campello in the Alicante city area could only manage 3.8 litres per square metre. Heavy storms hit the Vega Baja and Murcia regions strongly again last Monday night with extensive localised flooding reported at many locations, with a number of drivers trapped in their vehicles during the evening, and having to be rescued by the emergency services. The Monday night downpours brought 23 litres of rain per square metre in around half an hour to the Torrevieja area(pictured),

with the overall amount for the month that has fallen being over three times the September average for the city. The forecasters say that the worst of weather is n o w over.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines? What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap-

Media and Entertainment SL Monday Overcast & Rain High 27° Low 15° Chance of rain 15%

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Rain High 26° Low 16° Chance of rain 50% Tuesday Sunny High 27° Low 14° Chance of rain 0%

Saturday Overcast & Rain High 27° Low 16° Chance of rain 5% Wednesday Sunny High 27° Low 15° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Overcast High 27° Low 16° Chance of rain 0% Thursday Partly Cloudy High 27° Low 15° Chance of rain 0%

Friday, October 3, 2014

ELECTRIC SHOCK Electricity bills are set to go up yet again following an 11 per cent hike this summer. Wholesale energy suppliers have seen the highest prices of the year for September since December 2013. Earlier this week, the price per megawatt per hour (MWh) stood at 66.98 euros, meaning the average monthly figure is 58.90 euros. In August, it was much lower at 49.91 euros and in July, 48.21 euros.

THE YOUNG ONES

Carrefour is to slash prices for younger customers in its Spanish stores with a new discount card for those between 18 and 30 which will give them big reductions on IVA rates over a wide range of goods. Travel packages are also being offered on the Tarjeta Joven, in addition to the current discounts already in place for the over-65's and large families.

SANTIAGO CRASH ONE FOR THE ROAD

A teenager was seriously injured last Friday evening (September 26th) when a moped she was travelling on collided with a car in Santiago de la Ribera. The accident happened on Avenida Francisco Franco with the local police working on the theory that the moped didn't give way when it should have. A 15 year old girl had to be revived on the scene and was taken to the Virgen de la Arrixaca hospital, whilst the 17 year old that she was travelling with, only suffered minor elbow injuries. The driver of the car was tested negative for alcohol.

DOOMWATCH

The Guardia Civil caught up with a drunken motorist on Sunday who drove three miles down the wrong carriageway of the RM36. The 38 year old Spaniard spotted a Guardia checkpoint and in desperation went onto opposite carriageway to avoid them, starting off a high speed chase in the Cartagena area whilst oncoming cars were trying to avoid him. He was eventually collared by the officers and found to be three times over the drink-drive limit, and was carted off to see a Cartagena judge and charged with reckless driving and being intoxicated behind the wheel.

EL TEL DE VINO

Ex-football manager, Terry Venables is making his name as a wine producer on the Costa Blanca. The former England and Barcelona boss also owns a hotel outside Penáguila in Alicante Province, which opens this Monday as a luxury tourist complex, linked to local wine production. El Tel is a familiar figure in the area, buying farmland over the last decade, and then turning it into vineyards. He’s invested in Microviña, a system of fair farming, with the grower getting a fair share of the profits, linked with environmentally friendly systems of farming, based on traditional methods of production. His hotel wine menu includes Paquito el Chocolatero, Celler de la Muntanya, Almoroig and Albir Blanc.

Telefonica/Movistar is pushing to gain ground on mobile competitors in Spain by launching a set of radical new airtime and data tariffs for consumers. The four new Movistar tariffs kicked in on Wednesday with prices starting at 11 euros per month. The tariffs aim to provide users with more data at a lower cost, access to the operator's 4G network, and competitive minute bundles for calls. The mobile operator is feeling the pressure since Orange made a bid for Jazztel last month and Vodafone completed its deal to buy Ono in July.

MOZZIE WARS Valencia has become the first city in Spain to use drones for detecting mosquito nests. A small flying object with a builtin camera allows the council to seek out stagnant waters with mosquito larvae in areas difficult for humans to access, such as the rice fields in the Albufera wetlands, says the pest-control firm Lokímica which works for the local authority. Next February, Valencia will also become the first city in Spain to host the annual international conference held by the European Mosquito Control Association (EMCA).

GANGED UP

A 17 strong gang of cocaine importers and distributors has been smashed by the National Police and Guardia

Elche's Carrus area was the setting for a scene out of a science fiction movie last Thursday (September 26th) when firefighters wearing safety equipment and clothing had to deal with a chlorine gas leak. The drama unfolded on the Butano industrial estate close to the Aspe road with eight people being evacuated from their homes for three hours as an area of around 300 metres from the site of the leak was cordoned off. The leak came from a barrel containing hundreds of litres of the gas in an industrial unit.

TARIFFS DOWN

Civil on the Costa Blanca. 14 Columbians have been arrested along with two Spaniards and a Venezuelan who would get the drugs into Spain, and then get involved in an elaborate processing and distribution operation, Houses in Santa Pola, Elche, Alicante City, and Murcia City were amongst those that were raided, with over 38 kilos of cocaine being seized, as well as vehicles, cash, weapons, and many mobile phones. The police operation began last year, with various raids including one on two homes in the Santa Pola area, taking place in July, which also uncovered a laboratory in Murcia City. The gang members aged between 19 and 55 have been charged with crimes against public health as well as being part of an illegal organisation.

Friday, October 3, 2014

NO MARKET BRAVE LYNDA

Rojales Mayor, Antonio Perez, has done a U-turn over immediate plans to introduce a new market on Avenida Justo Quesada by the golf course in addition to the regular Thursday market(pictured). Opposition has come from existing market traders who feared that it would badly hit their business.

Actress Lynda Bellingham, who is suffering from cancer, has said she has chosen to stop chemotherapy. The 66 year old is the patron of the Costa Blanca Samaritans and is known for shows such as All Creatures Great and Small and Loose Women, as well as the Oxo TV adverts screened in the 1980s and 90s. She was diagnosed with colon cancer, which has since spread to her lungs and liver, in July 2013. Writing in her autobiography, Lynda said she told doctors she wanted treatment to stop in November.

HELPING CATS AND HAND DOGS

Spain's Catholic charity Caritas helped more people than ever in 2013, due to an increase in donations and volunteers. Caritas provided assistance to 2,513,563 in Spain in 2013, up from 1,904,737 a year earlier. The number of people the charity helped last year was also up 578 percent on 2007, or before the economic crisis ravaged Spain. In a separate survey, almost a quarter of people in the Valencian region, including the Costa Blanca, were below the poverty line according to figures reviewing 2013. 23.6 percent lived in households that were under the lower income poverty line, estimated at 8,114 euros for a home with one person. The survey puts the Valencia region as the sixth biggest area of poverty in Spain, some three points above the national average, with child poverty and youth unemployment exceptionally high.

CLUNK KLICK KIDDIES

Car travelling children are not belting up when they should, according to a Traffic Directorate (DGT) campaign last month. Guardia Civil Trafico officers found 40 children aged under 12 not wearing belts when being driven around the Costa Blanca over a one week period, whilst 82 adults were found being beltless as well. Authorities are clamping down on beltless driving and passengers as part of the recently introduced Road Safety Act.

ON FOOT

Torrevieja's Mayor, Eduardo Dolon, says he wants to have more pedestrianised areas in the city. The civic leader was speaking at the end of a two day road safety conference hosted in Torrevieja which saw 400 delegates from around Spain. Dolon (pictured on the right) said that a strategic mobility plan for the area would be announced shortly and that he wanted to follow the example of the pedestrianisation policies of the city of Pontevedra, whose mayor was amongst those attending the conference.

Over one hundred animal lovers gathered in Guardamar last Sunday to protest against what they say is the council’s policy of dealing with stray cats. They allege in a report carried by the Informacion newspaper that the company that is employed by the council to round up the stray felines ends up killing some of them, and that fines of up to 200 euros are in operation for feeding stray cats. The report quotes the event organiser, Andrés Navarro, as being critical of the council’s attitude to animals, mentioning that no beach area for dogs or a dog park has been provided in the area. In response, the Mayor, Carmen Verdú said that the council would consider changing the by-laws on feeding stray cats if this does not lead to a rise in the numbers that are abandoned. The council also added that they cannot change their contract with the company that rounds up strays as that was awarded fairly in a public tender.

BETTER BEACHES

Over half a million euros is to be spent on improving the beaches on the Costa Blanca. The money’s coming from the Valencian Government led by a major project to improve the dunes at Arenales del Sol(pictured), in addition to providing better beach access in the Guardamar area.

BETTER VEGA

Seven municipalities in the Vega Baja are to get just under a total of 29 thousand euros to improve their facilities at local cultural centres. The money comes from the Alicante Provincial council with money being earmarked for upgrading computers, projectors, furnishings and air conditioning at Benferri, Rojales, Cox, Guardamar del Segura, Callosa de Segura, Rojales and Pilar de la Horadada.

KNIGHT ERRANT

One of the UK's most-wanted men who was thought to be hiding in Spain has been arrested in a bar whilst playing poker. Suspected drug smuggler Robert Knight, from Walsall, was apprehended by armed police in a Calpe bar in the northern part of the Costa Blanca after six years on the run, and was forced to quickly fold his hand. He was named last year by the National Crime Agency as one of 13 of Britain's most-wanted who were in Spain. West Midlands Police seized 6kg of cocaine at Heathrow Airport in April 2008 and arrested five men, who were later jailed, but officers have been hunting for Knight ever since.

HABANERAS BOOST

Torrevieja's Avenida de las Habaneras is being given a spruce up by the city's Parks department with better irrigation, new plants, and improvements being made to the pavements. The roundabouts are also being given a makeover in addition to new road markings.

SAN JAVIER BLOW

San Javier airport had 3.4 per cent fewer passengers in August compared to a year earlier, going against a big upward trend in most Spanish airports, including the facility at Alicante-Elche, which is set for a record year. Nearly 162 thousand travellers went through San Javier in what is normally regarded as the busiest month of the year, with the year’s downward trend continuing.

GOOD AND BAD

The number of new home mortgages in Spain for July was up nearly 30 percent on a year earlier, but the property market is still a long way down on pre-crisis highs. The July figure of 18 thousand followed on from an 18 percent rise in June, but the year-on-year hike in June and July comes after two consecutive months of annual falls, some 13.4 percent in April and 3.4 percent in May.

Friday, October 3, 2014

BETTER TOGETHER Getting together seems to be more popular in the Valencian region, with a big leap on those getting their domestic partnerships formalised this year compared to 2013. Figures show that 827 couples signed the Valencia region's Register of Unions through till the end of August 2014, compared to 558 over the same period last year, which may be an indication that the economic situation is getting a bit better for some people. The region pioneered a domestic union law back in 2012 which allows couples to formalise their legal coexistence, even though they have chosen not to marry.

DOWN THE DRAINS

Work on upgrading Cabo Roig’s sewers has re-started after a break during the summer tourist season. The 344 thousand euro project from the Hidraqua company will see the replacement of pipes that are up to 40 years old helped by special underground machinery which will keep the digging up of roads and pavements to a minimum.

GAME OVER Catalunya’s planned independence vote has been blocked by Spain's constitutional court. Regional president Artur Mas (pictured) approved a law reform last Saturday allowing a nonbinding public 'consultation' to go ahead on November 9th after the central government banned him from holding a referendum – but judges at the highest court in Spain unanimously agreed both the legislation and that the vote would be illegal. The Catalunya government has ten days to appeal to the court in person.

ECO ALMORADI

Almoradi's parks and squares are to have new energy saving lights to cut costs and make the area more environmentally friendly. 90 thousand euros is being invested in the project which the council say is part of their plan to replace all of the lighting in the squares over the next year.

TOURISM PRIZE

Top achievers in the Costa Blanca tourist trade are to be rewarded next year in a new set of awards. Valencian President, Alberto Fabra, made the announcement during last Saturday's World Tourism Day celebrations in Valencia, with the Premis Turisme Comunitat Valenciana set to be awarded to groups and individuals who have done most to promote tourism in the region. Many attractions were busier than normal last weekend as museums and exhibitions used World Tourism Day to boost visitors, and there were special events like guided tours of the vineyards of La Mata.

LAST ORDERS

A Romanian man is facing up to seven and a half years in jail over a bar-room brawl in San Pedro del Pinatar five years ago. His trial started in a Cartagena court on Wednesday and the man, Lucian C., is accused of injuring two people in October 2009 with some broken bottles as well as causing substantial damage to the premises.

Friday, October 3, 2014

editor@thecourier.es editor@thecourier.es CouRIER PosTbAG: YouR vIEWs oN ouR NEWs

TAXING QUESTION

CHECK THAT FINE PRINT

I recently took a trip by car to the UK and took out an insurance policy, which was offered by the British hotels at the time of booking, to cover room cancellation in the event of any unforeseen problems preventing my arrival. Unfortunately our car broke down in Spain on our way to Santander and our trip had to be cancelled.

When claiming on the insurance, we were told that we were not covered because our trip did not start and end in the UK. On reading the "terms and conditions" now, I realize that this is correct, but would like to bring this to the attention of all ex-pats who are thinking of travelling back home. I realise now that the insurance would not have covered us even if we had travelled by plane and been delayed, because our trip was not starting in the UK. Joan Waddington

The UK Government has produced a consultation document to do with income tax allowances which may become law over the next few months. I’ve looked at it closely, and though I’m not a financial expert, this is how I understand the plans. In Paragraph 6.6 it relates to British people living in another country and suggests that those who are in receipt of Government style pensions, like those for the police and military, would still keep their personal allowance. If they live in another country like Spain, they may be having their state pension paid into Spain and dealt separately with under the local tax system. However, if this is the intention, why add Question 6.2.(below) at the end to 6.6? If a question is asked, a response is anticipated. My thoughts are that if there are insufficient responses received, will the law come into operation at next year’s spring Budget with the exclusion of 6.6, meaning that the Allowance is taken away from those now receiving it? QUESTION 6.2: Do you agree that retaining the UK Personal Allowance in respect of the income of nonresidents which is by treaty subject exclusively to UK taxation would help mitigate unfair outcomes from a broader policy of restricting non-residents’ entitlement

to the UK Personal Allowance? People are then given the opportunity to send in an e-petition in relation to this. I think is all quite ambiguous and I believe people should fill it in to help the people that worked for the UK state for many years not go through seeing their dwindling pensions reduced still further. The website is https://www.gov.uk/government/consultations/restricting-non-residents, whilst the link to the Petition is:- http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/68507 You need to hurry though as the consultation finishes next week on Thursday October 9th. Chris Poole

TIMELY WARNING With the recent bad flooding in some areas, which has led to some people drowning in their cars in years gone by, it seems that a timely warning about the danger to visitors and recent residents might be useful especially if we end up getting a repeat of the severe "Gota Fria" which in 1987 caused a lot of damage and loss of life in the Vega Baja. Underground car parks are very dangerous if not

BEWARE THE (blue) BANK ROBBERS……….

acted on quickly, and you need to get out quick before the exits get blocked by the water, and leave the worries about your car to your insurance company. Driving at night in torrential rain might also lead to losing sight of the road markings, and that could get you into severely flooded areas and getting trapped in your car. David Hudson Club Torrevieja Clasicos Red

CLEAR VIEW

………no, not the people who rob banks but the banks who rob people! At least one bank in Spain invites you to invest your pounds sterling in a one year fixed term account. What they do not warn you about is that if you later want to transfer your money to a UK bank, they will impose a penalty charge of 0.60%, plus costs. This will cancel out most of your interest. If you invested at their current interest rate of 0.80%, the charges would be greater than the net interest earned. This Well done to The Courier on a TV Guide that I can actually penalty seems to me to be unfair, unreasonable and unjustifiable. The cost of an electronic transfer does not vary with read without needing a magnifying glass. What a pleasant surprise that was last week. the amount transferred. Jane Bachelor A Victim LA MARINA Torrevieja

THE AbovE LETTERs ARE PRovIdEd bY REAdERs ANd do NoT NECCEsARILY REPREsENT THE vIEWs oF THE CouRIER oR THE TKo MEdIA GRouP PLEAsE PRovIdE AN AddREss ANd CoNTACT NuMbER (NoT FoR PubLICATIoN) WITH YouR CoNTRIbuTIoNs To THE LETTERs PAGE

Friday, October 3, 2014

SHORT BUT SWEET TRIP WITH CYCOLOGICAL The Cyclogical team in Quesada have this time come up with a shortish bike journey from Quesada to Guardamar with a nice flatish route that will take you around one hour there and back. Our trip saw us follow the road to Benijofar, and then turn right at cobbled area, and head towards Rojales. Once in the centre, you pick up the River Segura where you can see the large working water wheel just at the main bridge. There’s the added bonus of looking down at the river and seeing large fish

feeding and turtles swimming around depending on the time of year. Once you have enjoyed Rojales, follow the river to the edge of the town where you will pick up a dirt track, which takes you all the way to Guardamar, with some breathtaking scenery. At Guardamar. the track bends round to the right and you arrive at a bridge, which you cross and keep left, staying on the pavement, heading back towards the river and continue to cycle on the wide pavement (as it’s a one way street!) until

you come to where the road becomes two –way (about half way along) and you will eventually come to the barriers at the marina. Pass around them and in front of you is a lovely Tapas bar, “Restaurant Nautical,”which is open all day. After a refreshing break, you can either cycle around the marina and along the sea front to the town (additional 4kms) and then double back through the woods to the marina and retrace your route back to Rojales. Happy cycling from everybody at Cyclogical.

SAN MIGUEL ESTATES

San Miguel Estates established over five years ago by husband and wife team, Eddie and Jan Hill is already enjoying a busy sales year selling properties across the Costa Blanca and Costa Calida and are quickly expanding. With the demand for sales and rental properties growing at a rapid rate, the company has just taken on new staff to deal with the uploading of their extensive property portfolio to their website and various web portals to ensure sellers get maximum exposure to potential buyers. San Miguel Estates are also collaborating with a number of other reputed estate agents and builders in the region so they can find the right property for you. Eddie, a keen photographer, who has travelled the world with his hobby and has had many of his images published on a semi-professional basis, prides himself on his property images which are a key to good marketing of your home. Rentals are also an intricate part of the business and go hand in hand with the selling. New rental properties available on a long term basis are always in demand. Eddie

stated, “The demand for rental properties far exceeds availability and we need more properties”. For owners wishing to make an income from their Spanish home, they can rest assured that it will be in safe hands with Eddie and Jan offering a full key-holding and management service, from finding tenants to maintaining the property with their maintenance team on hand to carry out any work that may be required. When buying or selling a property, a complete legal service can be provided, and San Miguel Estates have a professional conveyancer on hand who speaks five languages. Whatever your property needs, whether buying or selling, looking for a property rental or wanting to rent out your Spanish property, Eddie’s friendly, charismatic and non-pushy persona will help you find exactly what you are looking for, and if you don’t, he will certainly make it a fun experience trying! You can visit San Miguel Estates online at www.sanmiguelestates.co.uk or email: info@sanmiguelestates.co.uk or Tel. 663 593 871.

Friday, October 3, 2014

SPANISH NEWS

GOING DOWN Spain’s jobless figures are continuing to show signs of improvement, despite the September figures showing a rise of 19,720, the lowest hike for that month in the past eight years. The overall figure shows unemployment as standing at 4,447,650 in September, according to statistics from the employment ministry. August and September usually see a rise in registered unemployment as temporary summer hires in the country's key tourism sector end.

"It is the weakest rise in registered unemployment in the month of September since 2007," the employment ministry said in a statement. The number of registered unemployed crept up by some 8,000 in August, putting an end to six months of declines. On a yearly basis, the number of unemployed, as measured by those signing on at government offices, was down by 276,705 people from September 2013.

DOGGIE RIDES

Dogs have been given the green light this week to travel on Barcelona’s underground Metro system, so long as they and their owners follow the rules. The move came in on Wednesday, but peak travelling times between 7 and 9 am and from 5 to 7pm have been classified as nogo areas for the pooches. Whereas previously only small dogs were allowed on the Metro, canines of all sizes will now be able to accompany their owners. The animals will also have to wear a muzzle and a microchip under their skin in order for authorities to be

able to identify them. The new law restricts one person to being with one dog and that under 16-year-olds cannot travel with the more dangerous breeds. It’s also forbidden for dogs to occupy any seats in the

carriages and once they get off the Metro, they can’t use the escalators. Dog owners will be fully responsible for their pets’ behaviour and will face fines if they let their animals off the leash or put other passengers in danger.

BALLS FOR BULLS Running in front of a group of bulls, along the narrow streets of Spain’s towns and villages, has become an annual tradition in many of the local fiestas, despite injuries being common place and the occasional fatality. But thrill-seekers may be able to experience the fun with less probability of getting hurt, if the bulls are replaced by giant balls. Four years ago the village of Mataelpino, near Madrid, began swapping bulls for balls in its annual fiesta, pitting daredevils against a giant ball – three metres in diameter – as it gains steam heading downhill towards the village bullring. The campaign group the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (Peta) now wants to help other municipalities across Spain and Portugal make the same kind of change by offering to provide similar balls to any interested mayor. The running of the balls has earned Mataelpino media cov-

erage across Spain, said Mimi Bekhechi of Peta, and even boosted the number of tourists visiting the village. “It’s obviously financially profitable for towns to do this.” But while Peta promotes the ball run as an animal-friendly alternative, the switch was motivated by the economic crisis, said Mataelpino resident Russel Sanguino. Worried about how to fund the village’s annual fiesta during a time of cost-cutting, a group of residents started batting around alternatives one night in the bar. “We started thinking, why not have a giant ball?” However, echoing a divide that plays out across the country, Mataelpino has an “ongoing dispute between those who want to have bull runs and bullfights and those who want the traditions to disappear for good. The town has so far sought to address the tension by holding both bull runs and ball runs.

Friday, October 3, 2014

OLIVES GET A STUFFING

'I DON'T like olives,' commented Fearful Phil in the pub the other night. 'But I haven't put an olive in your drink,' pointed out Dave the barman. 'Why would I serve you a half-pint of shandy with an olive in it? That would be ridiculous.' 'I never said you had put an olive in it,' said Fearful Phil. 'I'm simply saying that I don't like olives.' There was a brief silence before Dave the barman came back at Fearful Phil with: 'So why mention olives at all?' Fearful Phil shrugged and looked over helplessly at Andromeda Arkwright who was seated on her bar stool staring intently at the rest of us as if she were conducting a group therapy session. For the benefit of new readers (or old readers with short memories), Andromeda is the only female member of our pub discussion group. She had moved into the neighbourhood just a few weeks previously and the hostelry was her first port of call. After a few twitchy moments, we male inn-mates had welcomed her with unconditional approval. Andromeda was not only the most intelligent person to have ever crossed our pub threshold, she also possessed other attractive qualities, such as kindliness, affability and geniality,

as well as sufficient funds to pay for our drinks without us having to beg. However, what Andromeda thought of our little band of p u b brothers I shall probably n e v e r k n o w . 'Then I shall tell you,' she said, interrupting my introspection. 'When I first stepped into this hostelry I saw a bunch of guys who called themselves a discussion group. Such delusion. You lot talk nothing but rubbish and that is because you have the intellect of a clump of pond weed. As evidence, let us look at the main members of this gang of gasbags.' And thus began Andromeda's damning indictment of her new drinking buddies . . . 'Indoor Lou: So called because he would not leave his house for years, convinced that he was being watched constantly by intergalactic aliens who wanted to suck out his brains if he crossed the front doorstep to go to the bookies. Let's face it, the draining of Lou's grey stuff wouldn't have yielded much of a sam-

ple -- and HE is the most intelligent member own house? It makes no sense. of your pub group! 'And now for Dave the 'Fearful Phil: So called because he spent

t h e whole of 2013 in bed, fearing that the year contained the Devil's number. I have no doubt that Phil's granddad did the same in 1913 and probably got up in 1914 only because there was a world war on. 'Daft Barry: So called because he struggles to come to terms with anything that's rational or sensible. This must be true because Barry's big hero is Dave Silver, a sad little man who constantly strives to attain the heady heights of mediocrity but fails every time. 'Fag Ash Bill; So called because this pub regular rarely enters the premises as he prefers to smoke on the pavement. Why does he bother to come all the way into town when he can stand outside his

TOM’S WELCOME

STORAGE PLEA

If you enjoy singing, then the Casa Tom Community Choir would love to hear from you, with weekly rehearsals for this new group every Monday afternoon at 2.00pm for 2.30pm in the San Luis area of Torrevieja. Everybody is welcome to join the choir and there are no auditions, with men and women of all ages welcome at Avenida Jaca 31. For more information call or e-mail Terry on 647 189 135 or casatomsanluis@gmail.com

Do you have a nice dry, clean, and secure storage area with easy access in the Los Alcazares area? If so, Help at Home Mar Menor would love to hear to from you, as they have mobility equipment, wheelchairs, and walkers that urgently need storing. If you can help, please E-mail helpathomespain@gmail.com or phone Pam on 968 582 535.

barman. Mein host looks like he has been pulled out of a relaxing bath, hurriedly dried and dressed by a stranger and then plonked still bewildered into a sce-

nario not of his making. 'I strongly suspect that Dave has spent too much time with you lot over the years and some of your intense lack of intellect has rubbed off on him. 'But the saddest of all of you is your leader, guide and mentor, Ol' Red Eyes, who cannot lead, guide or mentor anybody because he sleeps all the time.' There was a sudden movement on the floor as Ol' Red Eyes opened one rheumy peeper and said: 'Would you please keep the noise down. Some of us -well, one of us -- is trying to get some rest.' All of us (apart from Ol' Red Eyes, of course) were profoundly

shocked by Andromeda's awful assessment of our talents (?) and we cried out in unison: 'What can we do to rectify this terrible situation? How can we become a proper team of intellectual debaters?' Andromeda smiled. 'By stretching your atrophied brains. One of you must take any topic, no matter how specialised, and force it to the fore of your conscious mind. Then speak out and let the discussion flow freely!' Each of us tried desperately to think of a serious subject and it was eventually Fearful Phil who broke the ice. Yes, it was at this point that a highly-nervous Phil opened his quivering lips and announced: 'I don't like olives.'

Friday, October 3, 2014

DIAMOND COUPLE It’s congratulations to La Marina couple John and Bette Moore, who yesterday(October 2nd) celebrated their Diamond wedding anniversary. They’ve lived on the Costa Blanca for 11 years, and they got married on October 2nd 1954 at Walton-on-Naze parish church. They have three children, eight grandchildren and three great grandchildren. John, is an ex-marine engineer and Bette used to own a gift shop Walton and they enjoy life to the full, and have been celebrating their anniversary at a party with the many friends they have made since moving to Spain as well as their family coming in from the UK

COST CONCERN Age Concern, Costa Blanca South, is in urgent need of items to help cover their costs and help the charity keep up the high standard of their care they provide in the area. They are after donations of clothes, bric-a-brac, bedding, and small furniture, in fact anything that you don’t want or need, for their shops in Torrevieja and Los Montesinos. Items can be collected by calling 966 786 887.

REF GETS IT

AFA SHOW

A special fund-raising show in aid of AFA Alzheimer’s Torrevieja is being put on this Sunday at the city’s Municipal Theatre. The entertainment starts at 8.00pm and the tickets at just five euros each are on sale from the box office or the Kisha Hair and beauty salon at the Filton Centre in Los Balcones. The theme is “Before you forget me”, with the night promising to be colourful and entertaining with 18 hair and makeup models on a cat walk and a variety of dance, theatre and music acts. The evening is under the supervision and direction of Veronica Espinosa, proprietor of the Kisha Hair and Beauty Salon and this is her second extravaganza in Torrevieja, following the success of her first show at the Hotel Dona Monse last year.

ALL FOR STACEY

Inspired by the bravery of a young girl, Stacey Mowle, a Tottenham Hotspur supporter who – five years ago – was diagnosed with Neuroblastoma (a very virulent and aggressive form of cancer) members of the Spurs Supporters Spain have started raising money to assist the appeal in her name to get her to the USA for the treatment she so badly needs. The Stacey Mowle Appeal needs to raise around half a million pounds, and October sees club secretary Graeme Clark agreeing to last the whole month without drinking alcohol. Plans for November are already

well advanced with a Legends Evening starring Graham Roberts and Stephen Sedgley to be staged jointly at Moores Bar and Marinasol restaurant in Cabo Roig on Saturday November 15th, and that month also sees a MowVember Challenge, with entrants not shaving for the whole of November! For more information on any of these events, check out the website, www.spurssupportersspain.com or contact Graeme Clark on 966 764 403 (office hours 10am to 4pm Monday to Friday). Alternatively pop into Moores Bar on Cabo Roig and have a word with Martin.

VIVACE GEAR UP

The Vivace Classical Choir are getting ready for their new season, and they start rehearsals next week for a special performance of Mozart’s Requiem this coming March. The

As an international football referee Mark Halsey was used to sometimes being showered with insults from fans, but never being soaked by icy water. That was his fate this week when he volunteered for the ice bucket challenge at The Celtic Isle, in Playa Flamenca. The restaurant is the venue for the Help at Home Tuesday morning market, and over the past weeks stallholders and members of the charity have all been brave enough to take part. Mark was a top line ref from 2000 to 2006, but he and his wife Michelle decided to move to Cabo Roig after she was diagnosed with leukaemia and he had previously been treated for throat cancer. Money raised will go to the Caritas appeal for food aid for the needy in Orihuela Costa. Help at Home Costa Blanca are inviting more traders to support the Tuesday market and is also appealing to the public to become volunteers to help patients with such tasks as basic nursing, driving patients to hospital and doctor’s visits, shopping, gardening and other basic help.

choir, under their musical director, Tom Pargeter, will be returning to the church of the Colegio de Santo Domingo in Orihuela(pictured) to perform the oratorio, but they are also going to be presenting an evening of Christmas music at the start of December. New singers in all voice sections will be welcome, and more details can be got from Tom himself, by email to tomandkaty@tpargeter.com, or by phoning Douglas Brown on 659 616 356 . The first rehearsal will be this Thursday October 9th at the Casa de Cultura in San Miguel de Salinas at 7.15pm.

KARATE KIDS CELEBRATE There’s no messing with the youngsters of the Escuela de Karate Shotokan which held its graduation ceremony for the class of 2014 in Fit 4 All in Punta Prima, Torrevieja. Class instructor, Arturo Balcón, praised everyone who got their new belts and certificates of competence in front of their proud parents and families. The graduates came from a wide range of nationalities including British, Irish, Spanish, and Russian, and started from eight upwards!

Friday, October 3, 2014

CHARITY COSTS MONEY

We have been a registered charity now for a few months and truthfully, we are finding it extremely difficult, financially, to keep doing what we do. We currently have 32 animals under our care and if you work out how much this costs each month on food and especially vet bills, it is a constant struggle. This is especially given the fact that we rescue and rehabilitate the most severely abused animals, and then you can begin to imagine how often we need funds for vet fees. Donations are very slow to come in, as people say we do a fantastic job, but of course we cannot do that without proper funding. It is only my wife and I who run the charity and because we are constantly busy caring for the animals we have, it is near on

impossible to try and arrange some sort of fundraising. For instance, one of the puppies we have rescued and are now helping, is a deaf and blind German Shepherd. She is now doing fantastic, but the work that goes into her rehabilitation is huge. We have to make sure we are here looking after each of the animals needs, as I believe if you are going to do something, then do it properly. Every aspect of our animals welfare is looked into and taken very seriously. Nutrition is so important and they eat and need specialist food in some cases and in general the standard of food we feed them is very high. This is a crucial aspect in them getting back to full health. Hygiene is also very important and

each animals goes through a routine, to keep them clean and free of fleas and ticks etc. Many of you will be familiar with my work, as I have now been

writing for this newspaper for nearly three years. When it comes to my profession, as a dog behaviourist, the work you will get here in Spain is virtually non existent and as we head

towards Christmas, you will probably be amazed to know that I have only been asked to do two consultations this whole year!!!

Everyone wants to know how to fix problems with their dogs, but NO ONE wants to pay for it! I wonder how far these people would get, if they called their electrician or plumber and said, “Can

PETS CORNER : CAN YOU TAkE IN A HOMElESS dOg OR CAT?

Poppy Poppy is an 8 months old Breton Spaniel / Podenco mix, and was abandoned in a bin. She has her passport and all her vaccinations are up to date, house trained and does not chew. She loves playing and is good off the lead. If you could adopt Poppy please contact us, lasthopedogrescue@outlook.com.or phone us 634 065 540.

Ruby The K9 Club is looking for a home for Ruby, who is a 21 month old spayed female. She loves people and wants nothing more than to sleep on your lap. She is micro chipped, fully vaccinated, and has a current pet passport. Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es Chico is about 10 months old. He is an adorable short haired pointer cross and a lovely affectionate good-natured dog. He gets on with all other dogs and cats, and is great with people too and is one of those dogs that you feel has been with you forever. For more information on this special boy, please ring the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or Email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail.com

Chico Jerry and Holly

Jake

Jake is a 4 year old GSD that was left to die chained up, and he was almost starved to death when he was found. If this was not bad enough, he was given to the Perrera where he was going to be put to sleep. PEPA rescued him and he is now doing really well he is a beautiful dog great with other dogs and ready to go to a new home. For more information please telephone the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail.com

Maurice

Jerry and Holly are about 10 weeks old and were rescued from a dog hoarder’s house in Maurice is 7 weeks old and was rescued with his Murcia. They are happy, playful pups, good mum and tabby brother and placed in foster with other dogs and cats and will be small homes. Maurice is good with other cats and very when fully grown. Call: 645 469 253. affectionate. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsinspain.com www.petsinspain.com

you tell me over the phone, how to carry out this particular job, because I'm not going to pay for you to come out”? I promise the person on the other end of the line would hang up as quickly as they picked the phone up. That means that money has to come from somewhere to fund the charity work we are so passionate about, but more often than not, these pleas just fall on deaf ears, as most people just turn the page to the next article. We are now running dangerously close to having no funds whatsoever for food for these animals and there is currently certainly no money to pay for vet fees. We are in desperate need of help, so I am asking you please to give what you can. Even if it is only one euro, that will help. I know these are financially difficult times for

most of us, but I wouldn’t be writing this unless we were in desperate need, which we now are. The animals we are rehabilitating, have been through unimaginable and terrible situations, so please give what you can. There are other great charities out there doing great work too, but I think our problem is that because we are so new and also so small, with two of us running the show, these facts work against us. www.thedogyouneed.co m is a registered charity, where we rehabilitate the most severely abused animals. Our charity registration number is 1157175. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by Paypal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.co m or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60-16-03 and the account number is 73754900. Thank you.

Friday, October 3, 2014

AUTUMN IS HERE

So summer is officially over and we begin the trip into autumn, although of course here in Spain the transition is less obvious than when we lived in the UK. The leaves on the trees do not begin to change colour from a bright green to a light shade of brown and slowly fall to the floor. The weather, although not as hot as summer, does not change so obviously and the nights stay lighter for longer compared to our old homeland, but although the difference is not as marked, it is still there. The temperature drops those few degrees to make the nights more comfortable, and the days easier to bear too. The clouds once again return to the sky which changes from a sea of bright blue to a patchwork blanket of whites and greys with the occasional azure peeking through(unless we get a Gota Fria!). I know some people return to Spain around this time as they had left here a while ago to avoid the hot summer months which, understandably, are unbearable for some folk. They then come back to enjoy the temperate climate, where we can still sit outside in the evenings and keep our doors open. For the past two weekends, I have been out on Saturday night. A fortnight ago, we celebrated a friend´s birthday and we went to a restaurant in Guardamar next to the beach. We arrived around 9.30pm and sat outside with a nice sea breeze blowing gently through the air. Our meal was eaten in tranquil warmth. I had no need for a jacket nor even a cardigan as I relaxed in a short sleeved dress. We then went for a walk along the sand, and I took off my shoes in order to protect them as I didn´t want them ruined on the soft grains and walked comfortably. It was around midnight and

my feet didn´t feel cold; they were cushioned on the soft surface and I was happy and relaxed. The only problem was the

difficulty in walking a distance as my calves began to let me know it was getting a bit arduous! We soon reached some bars and sat with a cool drink, and there was no need to warm ourselves up even sat on the beachfront in the middle of September, with coats or jackets unnecessary! I love this country and one of the big reasons is the fantastic climate, and let’s treat the last few days as one of those rainy things that we needy for a short time! I’m a summer person. I love the heat, even when I´m trying to get ready for a night out and the make-up is running off my face.

I would never complain. However last weekend, when I went out I felt the change in temperature from just a week before. On a completely different subject, yes I went out two Saturdays in a row, almost unheard of for me, but it was a nice change and I enjoyed getting dressed up to go out for the night. My life is very busy still but I enjoy getting out and about when I can, however, back to my original point! Last weekend when I went out, it was in a long sleeved top and I even put a coat on, albeit a light one, and I began to feel the chill as we left the restaurant. I started to think about winter on its way, back to the heaters and duvets. It’s the time of year that I really don´t like, and thank goodness it´s only for a few months and then the weather will warm up again! I remember last winter and for about two months I had a permanent cold. I really hope this time round, I can build up my defences and hopefully my students won´t bring in every bug going, I don´t think I could face another winter full of illness! For now though, I shall enjoy the cool autumn evenings, making sure I wrap up if I feel chilly and get in a few early nights. I shall carry on enjoying my weekends and working hard during the week in order to keep this dream alive for as long as possible. This is a great place to live, I have few friends but those I have are very special to me and my life is looking up, in all respects! I hope you all have a great week, enjoy the beginning of autumn, and keep going out, which is another benefit of this beautiful country in that we can go out all year and enjoy a social life. Take care and have fun; keep Spain moving; and support your local businesses whether British or Spanish and enjoy your life.

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Friday, October 3, 2014

WHAT CAM TOLD SAM Imagine the scene in a five star Birmingham hotel this week with Prime Minister David Cameron cuddling up to his other half Samantha in bed during Tory conference week in the Midlands, and Cam pouring out his thoughts of despair. “Darling,” he uttered, “I think we’re moving house on Friday May 8th 2015 because those nasty voters are not treating us fairly”. “David”, she replied, “It doesn’t really matter as you can pick up a peerage, plenty of lucrative speaking engagements, and that nice Boris bloke will take over leading the party”. Friday May 8th is the day after the next gen-

eral election, and at this moment, the removal vans will have been pencilled in for a visit to Downing Street, and a new tenant in Ed M i l i b a n d seems likely or is it? Politics is never fair but the Cameron family will feel r i g h t l y annoyed if they end up packing their bags for a sharp exit next May, along with their neighbour George, as well as their surrogate son, little Nick C. The fact is that what the coalition government has achieved in close to four and a half years is nothing short of a miracle. From a country on the

verge of going bust, the Tories and Lib Dems have turned things round with some tough medicine, with the UK on the crest of an eco-

wobble, Cameron’s gamble with the Scottish Referendum paid off, getting rid of Alex Salmond into the bargain, and he’s

nomic wave. High unemployment that Labour predicted never happened with current rates that are much lower than when Gordon Brown is in office. Despite a slight

pledged to have a national referendum over the EU. There’s also the matter of the public supporting (according to polls) air strikes against the IS lunatics in Iraq, and for

that matter Syria. So why no smiles in the Tory camp? Simple, it’s down to UKIP! Nigel Farage’s party will not go away, and even produced a second Tory MP to defect over to them this week in the shape of the wonderfully named, Mark Reckless, with the Rochester and Strood member resigning and getting ready for an embarrassing byelection for Cameron to add to the certain woes that he’ll be getting in Clacton next Thursday, when the other traitor/defector Douglas Carswell will romp to victory. It’s obvious that crucial Tory votes are going into UKIP camp, which is bad news for Cameron next May, but

is there a sting in the tail? Nigel Farage says that Labour heartland voters are ready to jump ship in their droves, and at the same time that Clacton votes, we have a by-election in the Lancashire town of Heywood, after the death of the sitting Labour MP. If we have a UKIP win there (which pundits say could happen), then we are set for the most unpredictable general election of modern times, with a teasing prospect that Cameron and Farage might cobble some kind of deal, which will leave the removal men out of a contract in May, leaving Ed Miliband on the sidelines. Well, that’s what I think Cam whispered to Sam the other night before they went into the land of nod, because they quite like living at Number 10.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU’VE BEEN BURGLED. Statistics in Spain

Crime rates in Spain remain among the lowest in the EU according to the latest Interior Ministry crime report. However, since the economic crisis began in 2008, there has been a steep increase in domestic burglaries and theft as a result. In 2012 the number of burglaries in homes rose by 25.4%. The message to expat residents is not to panic. There are some simple precautions to take, as you would back in the UK, such as fitting security grills, installing exterior lights and alarms, being careful about what content is posted on social networks, especially anything to do with trips and holidays away from home. It also helps to take out a quality home insurance policy that will cover your home and its contents should any unfortunate incident occur.

When you discover you’ve been burgled

As soon as you discover you’ve been burgled, whether it’s a break-in or theft at your home, first call the police. Don’t touch anything until they arrive. A police report will be needed to process your claim. Then secure your home to avoid further damage, board up any broken windows, make a list of damaged or missing belongings, detail the damage to your home resulting from the burglary, taking photographs of damaged windows or door. At this point, you can call the claims department of your home insurance company. We advise you to have your policy on hand when you call.

Peace-of-mind with Linea Directa

We understand that your peace-of-mind is important, especially in your home. Our claims department will take a full statement of the circumstances of the incident. We will check the insurance coverage with you explaining all the procedures. If emergency repairs are required from locksmiths to glaziers, we will help you swiftly handle your claim and get things back to normal as soon as possible. Fortunately, incidents of theft in Spain are relatively small compared to other EU countries, however should you be burgled, your homeowner’s insurance policy will cover the loss or destruction of personal property if it’s stolen from your home.

Hold-up outside the home

In many cases, your home insurance policy may cover you for any incidents that occur outside your home. Should you be the victim of a hold-up outside your premises your personal belongings are covered. We will ensure replacement documents are quickly and efficiently dealt with, and if required, arrange the locks on your home to be changed. We hope the information provided in this article is of interest. If you would like to contact Linea Directa please call 902 123 161 More information on Linea Directa online at www.lineadirecta.com

Friday, October 3, 2014

POWER CRAZY SAVINGS

If there is one thing which puts the British backs up it is being told what to do, especially if the organisation doing the telling hasn´t gained the respect of the British people. A classic example is the EU which many people in the UK would dearly love to put two fingers up to. And when that organisation comes up with such crass ideas like banning high powered electric vacuum cleaners on the altar of reducing future global warming, it´s a red rag to a bull. My simplistic logic says that if you have a high-powered vacuum it will suck up dust far quicker than a low powered one, so the job is completed far quicker. More power might be used but for a shorter time, so one cancels out the other. There would only be a benefit if manufacturers came up with more efficient machines using less power, and that´s an ongoing process. It´s called efficiency. Now the EU meddlers are planning to apply more stringent regulations and restrictions on petrol-driven lawnmowers, chainsaws, combine harvesters, river barges, excavators, bulldozers, crop harvesters, railcars, locomotives and inland waterway vessels like river barges. Heaven help us! While these European crackpots are busy placing restriction after restriction on almost everything, the rest of the world, Asia, the Middle East, North and South America, et al will still be pumping out emissions regardless and gaining a financial advantage in the process. I am sure you can come up with some more amazing ideas to reduce emissions and bring down global warming. Here´s three to be getting along with. Banning TVs which use elec-

tricity from the grid. Instead you have a machine you pedal to produce the power to run it. If your surname begins with the letter from AM you use your car on odd dates, if it´s from N-Z you drive on only even dates. And in summer months, using hot showers or hot baths is banned. Only the cold tap can be used - on orders of the European Commission. My take on all this - every time the EU comes up with another meddling, interfering idea which it wants to impose on Britain, another few thousand people who will vote UKIP to get Britain out of it. Global warming and emissions has to be tackled on a g l o b a l basis, and you start by reducing each year the amount of fossil fuels used, reducing it to zero in a sensible time frame. That means a total use of green energy. It could be done relatively soon. Sadly it won´t happen until humanity is forced to by sky high temperatures and seas overrunning coastal towns and cities. Question: What are the two most important issues facing Britain today? The answer: - immigration and the huge national debt/budget deficit, or to put it in a more understandable way, Britain not living within its means. These are the two issues which most concern people and have immense

bearing on the UK´s future prosperity. So what happened at the recent Labour Party conference? The clown the Labour party has chosen as its leader actually forgot to mention them in his speech. He had such conceit that he thought he could remember all that was important by just having notes in front of him at the rostrum. Clearly that conceit was misplaced. He should have had a properly prepared speech and stuck to it, but instead he sadly failed to cover the most

with the message from the new UKIP kids on the block, which more and more seem to be coming up with a new approach for Britain which is resonating with voters. Saving the vast sums of money Britain is paying to stay in the EU and the vast sums paid in overseas aid, would provide enough money to take all earners on minimum wage out of tax. But the common sense doesn´t end there. At their conference, UKIP unveiled a number of tax proposals say-

important issues. Another question: Do you want such a politician who fails so miserably before his own as the next prime minister? Anyone who thinks that such a man is capable of taking the world stage and able to cover all the bases he needs to cover, is plain crazy. And that´s before we look at the Labour policies, which involve company bashing, more public spending and trying to convince us they are going to cut the benefits system when actually all Socialists can think of is more state control, more state spending and more debt. It´s all in sharp contrast

ing it would cut income tax from 40p to 35p for people earning up to £55,000, as well as raising to £13,500 the amount people can earn before paying any income tax. The party's plans included stripping the right of "billionaires from Russia and Arab countries like Saudi Arabia" to come to the UK for VAT-free shopping on designer goods such as shoes and handbags. Nigel Farage told journalists after his conference speech that Russian and Saudi billionaires "should not be able to buy up the West End and claim their tax back". He is proposing a new tax tier of

25% on luxury goods with thresholds like £200 for a pair of shoes, £1,000 for a handbag or £50,000 for a new car. What is appealing about UKIP is that it smashes a huge hole through the two party system; the them and us syndrome; the rich and working class. And now a second Tory MP has "come out" and switched to UKIP. There could be more, and, I hope, not just Tories. MPs who do switch parties do not do it at a whim; it is done after months of deliberation and soul searching. After all, their political life can be in ruins, or made by doing it. The pending byelections in Labour and Tory constituencies will be extremely interesting. Incidentally, I detest the antics of some of my former colleagues who are hell-bent on trying to ridicule UKIP at every opportunity to follow their own newspapers' agendas, whether it be in support of the Conservatives or Labour. Sadly, as yet, we have not had a British newspaper which has come out supporting UKIP. In fact the picture I’ve used on this page appeared in one of the papers recently and was clearly designed at trying to ridicule the UKIP leader. We all make odd facial expressions at times, but the last thing we want to see is it appearing in print - in the same way as a private conversation about what the Queen thought of the Scottish referendum by David Cameron, shouldn´t have been broadcast. People should have more respect for others. There´s one person who I would like to see in politics and if he led a political party it would be an instant winner. Who? Not the clever Boris who has made an art out of being a joker. No, Sir Richard Branson. His business and people skills are second to none and his latest vote winner is to allow his personal staff as much holiday as they want. There was no need to ask for approval, nor say when they planned to return, the assumption being that

the absence would not damage the firm. It is left to the employee alone to decide if and when he or she feels like taking a few hours, a day, a week or a month off. The assumption being that they are only going to do it when they feel 100% comfortable that they and their team are up to date on every project and that their absence will not in any way damage the business - or, for that matter, their careers. Judging by online posts, the idea has gone down famously and people working for other firms say they would join Sir Richard at the drop off a hat if they had the chance. Being the cynic I am - I can´t resist asking whether you can imagine what the strike over nothing brigade, like underground workers, teachers, firemen and local government employees would make of an employer offering endless holidays! Would they put their own self-interest first or the interests of rail travellers, school children, the safety of the public or taxpayers? Sadly I think I know the answer. I´m now going to write on a topic which every man will know everything about. No not football or sex, but the horror of the wife re-arranging your personal space, or the kitchen, or the cupboards, or the garage. You know it will take weeks before you find stuff again. Well, my other half blitzed the kitchen this week and moved things from one cupboard to another. And guess what - an hour later, when she was preparing dinner, she couldn´t remember where she had put half the things. I usually cook breakfasts and it´s my turn to turn the kitchen upside down in the morning. Think of me in my hour of need, fellas! I think I´ll end up cooking brunch! So, the post office on the Orihuela Costa is cutting back on postal deliveries to individual houses as a cost cutting exercise. Little wonder it´s causing consternation and prompting protests. I wonder how long it will be before the British privatised post office looks at the Spanish example and follows suit? On one level I have sympathy, but on another I do not - I have little time for the very rich who build high walls around their exclusive houses to keep the riff-raff out but they want contact with the riff-raff when it suits them.

Friday, October 3, 2014

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH SPANISH 142

He cannot remember. She has to know. They can take the This week as I mentioned we are going to have some revi- car to the hotel. I can´t remember that. Can you wake me up sion exercises from basic to intermediate level covering all at seven? Are you going to choose the wine? aspects of Spanish from grammar and vocabulary to tenses. It´s not easy for us British who aren´t really sure of ´grammar´ words or different tenses. This was something I never learnt in school and had to learn as I picked my way through the Spanish language and of course through my teaching courses. It´s not the end of the world if you don´t know these words but it will certainly help if you do. So here we go with the exercises: First of all we are going to translate the following into Spanish: I want to go to the shop, I need to buy some bread, What´s the time? How much is that t-shirt? Do you want anything else? Who is going to the party? I don´t want to see anyone today! If I go to the shop, I have to go now. We went to the shop yesterday but it was closed. I didn´t have any money so I couldn´t buy the clothes I wanted. She never does her homework. I went to the cinema yesterday. We had a lot to eat today. When do you want to go? I hope you have a good day. He saw a good film last week, I want to see it. I read books. I don´t want wine, I want water. Do I close the door? We don´t know who they are. They follow their Next I´m going to write some questions in Spanish for you brother. She opens the window. He never watches television. He is currently a doctor. This book is much more useful than to reply in Spanish, some of them, for obvious reasons, will that one. I can´t, although I want. We talk while we run. She not have the full answers next week! ¿Cómo te llamas?¿Cómo se escribe tu nombre? ¿Cómo doesn´t eat meat or fish. If you want. Yesterday, you were at estás? ¿De dónde eres? ¿Dónde naciste tú? ¿Tiene usted the beach. I didn´t ask you. The lunch finished five minutes ago. I liked that wine. He didn´t ask me. She didn´t like him. mascotas en casa? ¿Cuál es tu número de teléfono? ¿Qué

día fue ayer? ¿Cuál es la fecha de hoy? ¿Cuántas camisas rojas tienes? ¿Quién es el presidente de España? Y ¿De qué partido es? ¿Dónde está Madrid? ¿Cuántas comunidades autónomas hay en España? ¿Cómo se llama el rey de España? Y ¿quién es su padre? ¿Qué cordillera separa España de Francia? ¿Puedes decir el nombre de algunas de las islas de las Canarias? ¿Cuántos idiomas diferentes se hablan en España? ¿Qué otro ingrediente contiene la tortilla española además de huevo?¿Cómo se llamaba el dictador que gobernó en España tras la Guerra Civil (1936-1939) hasta su muerte en 1975? Quién lleva regalos a los niños españoles la noche del 5 de enero? ¿Con motivo de qué festividad los españoles comen 12 uvas seguidas? I hope you have managed to answer all the above questions. Take your time and check any translations you are not sure of. You have a week to answer them so there’s plenty of opportunity to revise and get them correct. Try and answer as fully as possible to practise making sentences rather than just writing one or two words, and read the questions out loud to get used to the sounds of Spanish. If you need to revise the pronunciation then now is your opportunity. Remember Spanish is a phonetic language so once you know how to pronounce the letters you can say any word. Take your time with this week´s exercises. They are mainly aimed at beginners and low intermediate level, so all of you should be able to answer quite a few! Have fun, and I´ll give you the answers next week. ¡Que tengas una buena semana!

Friday, October 3, 2014

The 10 fruiT juices wiTh more sugar Than coca-cola Dr Sandra White, the Public Health England director of dental public health, said many parents were giving babies and toddlers fruit juices without realising they were packed with sugar. Her report found that one third of all children have tooth decay by the age of three. She advised parents to only give milk or water to children until the age of three, and avoid using bottles or sipping cups for any drinks which contain sugar. Dr White said fruit juice was now “the biggest culprit” behind shocking levels of decay in many parts of the country. Some drinks companies have started to cut down on the

amount of sugar in drinks aimed at children. Britvic, the owner of Fruit Shoots, stopped making full-sugar versions of the drink during the summer of 2014. However many consumers do not realise the high level of sugar in fruit juices, especially those found in the chiller cabinet of supermarkets. Here is a list of 10 juices that contain more than 10.6g of sugar per 100ml. This is the level found in full-sugar Coca Cola. This is only an illustrative list. There are many more fruit juices -- especially tropical drinks, those with apple juice concentrate and grape juices -that contain more than 10.6g of sugar per 100ml. Most orange juices contain 10g of sugar per 100ml. Sainsbury's 100% Pressed Red Grape Juice

16.3g per 100ml Del Monte Mango & Papaya Juice Drink 14.1g per 100ml Waitrose Essential Apple and Raspberry Juice Drink 13.9g per 100ml Waitrose Pressed Apple & Mango Juice 12.6g per 100ml Innocent Pure Fruit Smoothie Mango & Passion Fruits 12.2g per 100ml Tymbark Multifruit Carrot Drink 11.5g per 100ml Tesco Everyday Value Apple Juice 11.4g per 100ml Aldi’s Del Rivo Apple Juice 11.33g per 100ml Tesco Apple & Blackcurrant from concentrate 11.12g per 100ml Libby's Tropical Juice Drink 10.9 per 100g

Friday, October 3, 2014

Your FREE TV Guide

CAN YOU NAME THESE CHARACTERS & FILMS?

TRELI ON THE TELLY PEAKY BRILLIANT

with ALEX TRELINSKI One of the trio of classy new UK dramas that got me excited last year returned to BBC 2 last night in the form of Peaky Blinders (the other two shows being Broadchurch and The Fall). It’s uncompromising stuff as we follow the post First World War gangland antics of the Shelby clan in Birmingham, with the action shifting further afield to take in London, and the usual hot performances led by Cillian Murphy as Tommy as well as from Helen McCrory and Sam Neill. To top it all

up, we even have Tom Hardy appearing in the series later on to apparently steal the show. It’s riveting and uncompromising television that may be uncomfortable for some, but pushing the boundaries for British producers is essential, as we have now got used to ground-breaking material from the States, which would have been unheard of before The Sopranos appeared 15 years ago. It’s all smoke and mirrors with The X Factor, with the ITV Press Office doing a great job getting the UK tabloid press to lead with stories about the show and the injustice to some contenders during last weekend’s chair phase, where Cheryl lost the plot. I’ve no idea why this merits thousands of column

inches? It’s only a television programme folks! But it’s all good publicity for ITV as we get another triple dose weekend, including the annual digging up of Sinitta’s corpse as she kisses up to former beau, Simon Cowell, in the judge’s houses section. The new series of You’ve

Been Framed is a doubleedged sword for ITV. Harry Hill’s narration and script is superb, but it also reminds the network of how much they miss him and TV Burp. Wisely, two and a half years on, they’ve not chosen to spoil the memories of putting on a second-rate replace-

ment for Harry, but instead will use him on a revival of Stars in their Eyes. That’s in addition to the ex-doctor working on a secret project for BBC1. A word for BBC1’s drama Our Girl on a Sunday in the suicide slot against Downton Abbey. It’s highly watchable

and deserves better treatment, and at the least I would suggest a repeat next summer for a wider audience when nothing else is on. I’ve nothing against Sky and their sports coverage, especially with golf. But the peanut audience figures for the great occasion that is the Ryder Cup degraded a great event that all golf fans should have had a chance to view free of charge on the BBC, and not highlights when the result is known to all and sundry. If the Royal and Ancient “sell out” over the Open (the only Major that the BBC has full live rights to, and there are nasty rumours abounding), then clearly money talks and the viewers don’t count. Credit then to bodies like the LTA who say that they love what the BBC do with Wimbledon and are not interesting in extra pickings from companies like Sky and BT Sport.

FRIDAY

Friday, October 3, 2014

VIERNES

3rd

OCTOBER

00:35 This Week 01:20 Holiday Weatherview 01:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Home Away from Home 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 A Question of Sport 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Would I Lie to You? 22:00 Have I Got News for You 22:30 Big School 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Graham Norton Show

00:20 Paisley: A Life 01:20 This World 02:20 Panorama 02:50 Formula 1 04:40 This Is BBC Two 04:55 Schools - Poets in Person 05:25 Schools - Simon Armitage, Writing Poems 05:55 Schools - Once Upon a Time 06:40 Bringing Books to Life 06:40 Bringing Books to Life 06:45 Bringing Books to Life 06:45 Bringing Books to Life 06:50 Bringing Books to Life 06:55 Formula 1 08:35 Saints and Scroungers 09:20 The Housing Enforcers 10:05 Super Senses: The Secret Power of Animals 11:05 Sweets Made Simple 11:35 The Travel Show 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Cash in the Attic 14:30 Celebrity MasterChef 15:15 Ready Steady Cook 16:00 The Life of Mammals 17:00 Great British Railway Journeys 17:30 Pressure Pad 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Lorraine Pascale: How to Be a Better Cook 22:00 Tom Kerridge's Best Ever Dishes 22:30 Gardeners' World 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 River Monsters 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes? 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Gino's Italian Escape 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 The X Factor 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 The Job Lot

00:35 24 Hours in Police Custody 01:50 One Born Every Minute USA 02:45 Dogs: Their Secret Lives 03:40 Operation Maneater 04:35 Unreported World 05:00 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 05:55 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 06:05 Deal or No Deal 07:00 Countdown 07:45 Will & Grace 08:10 The King of Queens 08:35 The King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Four in a Bed 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 13:35 Four in a Bed 14:05 Four in a Bed 14:40 Four in a Bed 15:10 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 Unreported World 21:00 Stars at Your Service 22:00 Gogglebox 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:00 Can't Pay? We'll Take It Away 01:00 SuperCasino 04:10 Too Tough to Teach? 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Great Scientists 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 House Doctor 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Pip Ahoy! 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Never Teach Your Wife to Drive 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Subzero 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 World War II in Colour 21:00 Storage: Flog the Lot! 22:00 Body of Proof 23:00 NCIS 23:55 NCIS

00:00 Family Guy 00:25 Family Guy 00:45 Family Guy 01:10 Family Guy 01:35 Don't Drop the Baby 02:30 Don't Tell the Bride 03:30 Bluestone 42 04:00 Don't Drop the Baby 05:00 Close 20:00 Hotel of Mum and Dad 21:00 Don't Drop the Baby 22:00 Porn - What's the Harm? 23:00 Some Girls 23:30 EastEnders

00:30 Gardens in Time 01:30 Top of the Pops: 1979 02:00 Young Guns Go for It 02:30 Detectorists 03:00 World War One at Home 03:30 The Secret Life of Books 04:00 Caravans: A British Love Affair 05:00 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:30 BBC Proms Chamber Music 21:00 Sound of Cinema: The Music That Made the Movies 22:00 Wild Boys: The Story of Duran Duran 22:50 TOTP2: 80s Special 23:50 The Kate Bush Story: Running Up That Hill

00:20 Dapper Laughs on the Pull 00:50 Tricked 01:50 Two and a Half Men 02:15 Two and a Half Men 02:40 Two and a Half Men 03:00 Dads 03:25 Teleshopping 06:55 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 The Hot Desk 07:10 The Cube 08:05 Emmerdale 08:30 Emmerdale 09:00 The Only Way Is Essex 09:50 You've Been Framed! 10:35 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 11:30 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 12:25 Millionaire Matchmaker 13:15 Emmerdale 13:50 Emmerdale 14:20 You've Been Framed! 14:50 The Jeremy Kyle Show 15:55 The Jeremy Kyle Show 17:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:05 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 19:00 The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills 20:00 You've Been Framed! 20:50 The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor 23:00 The Xtra Factor 23:35 Release the Hounds

00:35 William and Mary 01:35 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 02:35 Judge Judy 03:00 Judge Judy 03:20 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 The Upper Hand 07:25 Heartbeat 08:20 Wild at Heart 09:20 Wycliffe 10:30 Judge Judy 10:55 Judge Judy 11:25 Judge Judy 11:50 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 13:00 Wycliffe 14:05 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 17:25 Second Thoughts 17:55 Never the Twain 18:25 On the Buses 19:00 Heartbeat 20:00 Judge Judy 20:30 Judge Judy 21:00 Lewis 23:00 Blue Murder

01:35 The Game 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 UEFA Champions League Greatest Matches 07:10 Motorway Patrol 07:35 Highway Patrol 07:55 Cheers 08:20 Cheers 08:50 The Professionals 09:50 Kojak 10:55 Magnum, PI 11:55 Minder 12:55 The New Avengers 14:00 The Professionals 15:00 Motorway Patrol 15:25 Highway Patrol 15:55 Minder 16:55 Kojak 18:00 Magnum, PI 19:00 UEFA Europa League Highlights 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 Storage Wars 21:30 Storage Wars 22:00 The Spy Who Loved Me

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS

Have I Got News For You BBC1 - 22:00

1/10. New series. They always say `no news is good news', but whoever `they' are, they're obviously not the staff writers for Have I Got News for You - a series which would be nothing were it not for the headlines. The show returns for a new run this week, and fortunately there has been a wealth of news stories recently - giving guest host Jennifer Saunders plenty to go on as she quizzes team captains Paul Merton and Ian Hislop, along with their guest panellists, on recent events. Appearing this week are Scottish satirist, writer, television director and radio producer Armando Iannucci, and British Conservative Party politician Peter Bone MP.

Friday, October 3, 2014

4th

SATURDAY SABADO

00:25 Live at the Apollo 01:10 EastEnders 03:05 Weather for the Week Ahead 03:10 BBC News 06:00 Formula 1 08:30 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Nigel Slater's Dish of the Day 13:00 BBC News; Weather 13:10 Football Focus 13:50 Saturday Sportsday 14:00 Formula 1 15:30 Bargain Hunt 16:15 Escape to the Country 17:00 Final Score 18:15 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:30 Pointless Celebrities 19:20 Strictly Come Dancing 21:30 Doctor Who 22:15 Casualty 23:05 The National Lottery Live 23:15 BBC News; Weather 23:30 National Lottery Update 23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 00:15 00:40 01:00 01:20 01:50 02:20 02:50 03:20 03:50 04:20 04:35 05:00 20:00 21:00 22:05 23:30

Comedy Feeds Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Bad Education Some Girls People Just Do Nothing People Just Do Nothing People Just Do Nothing People Just Do Nothing Comedy Feeds Comedy Feeds Close Great Movie Mistakes Top Gear Kung Fu Panda Bad Education

DON’T MISS

OCTOBER

00:00 Weather 00:05 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 00:35 Later - with Jools Holland 01:40 My Year without Sex 03:10 This Is BBC Two 03:55 Formula 1 05:05 Question Time 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:25 The Falcon's Alibi 08:25 The Charge of the Light Brigade 10:20 The Trials of Life 11:10 The Trials of Life 11:55 Map Man 12:30 South Africa Walks 13:00 Lorraine Pascale: How to Be a Better Cook 13:30 The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking with Rachel Khoo 14:00 Flying down to Rio 15:25 Follow the Fleet 17:15 Rick Stein's Mediterranean Escapes 18:15 The £100K House: Tricks of the Trade 19:15 Restoring England's Heritage 19:45 Gardeners' World 20:15 The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice 20:45 Penguins - Spy in the Huddle 21:45 Dad's Army 22:15 Genesis: Together & Apart 23:50 TOTP2

00:10 The Nutty Professor 01:55 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Fort Boyard Ultimate Challenge 07:25 Pat & Stan 07:35 Pat & Stan 07:40 Dino Dan 08:05 Canimals 08:10 Canimals 08:20 Om Nom Stories 08:25 Sooty 08:40 Mr Bean: The Animated Series 08:50 Matt Hatter Chronicles 09:15 Nerds & Monsters 09:30 The Munch Box 10:25 The Hungry Sailors 11:25 Murder, She Wrote 12:25 ITV News and Weather 12:29 ITV Meridian Weather 12:30 Storage Hoarders 13:30 May the Best House Win 14:30 The X Factor 15:30 About a Boy 17:30 The X Factor 18:35 Off Their Rockers 19:05 ITV Meridian Weather 19:05 ITV News Meridian 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:30 New You've Been Framed! 20:00 The Chase 21:00 The X Factor 22:20 Through the Keyhole 23:15 ITV News and Weather 23:29 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 Red Heat

00:05 Scrotal Recall 00:35 Jon Richardson Grows Up 01:35 Wall Street 03:35 Boss 04:35 Anna & Katy 05:00 The Inbetweeners USA 05:25 Win It Cook It 05:50 Deal or No Deal 06:45 NFL: Rush Zone 07:10 How I Met Your Mother 07:35 How I Met Your Mother 08:00 Trans World Sport 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Weekend Kitchen 11:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:30 Frasier 12:00 Frasier 12:30 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:25 The Simpsons 13:55 Gadget Man 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:05 Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 17:35 Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 18:05 Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 18:35 Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 19:05 Stars at Your Service 20:05 Channel 4 News 20:20 Sarah Beeny's Double Your House for Half the Money 21:15 Grand Designs 22:20 Battle Los Angeles

00:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 01:15 SuperCasino 04:10 Crimes That Shook Britain 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Great Scientists 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 House Doctor 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:35 Seaside Antics 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:05 Olly the Little White Van 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:45 City of Friends 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Wanda and the Alien 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Chinese Food in Minutes 11:15 The Secret Life of Pets 11:45 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door 12:45 Can't Pay? We'll Take It Away 13:45 Storage: Flog the Lot! 14:40 Patton 18:00 5 News Weekend 18:05 Silverado 20:35 Joe Kidd 22:15 A Fistful of Dollars

00:50 Kate Bush at the BBC

00:35 Dapper Laughs on the

00:30 William and Mary

01:50 Oh! You Pretty Things:

Pull

01:35 The Pianist

The Story of Music and

01:00 The X Factor

Fashion

02:00 The Xtra Factor

02:50 Wild Boys: The Story

02:30 Two and a Half Men

of Duran Duran

02:50 Two and a Half Men

07:00 Judge Judy

03:40 TOTP2: 80s Special

03:15 Teleshopping

07:20 Judge Judy

04:40 Close

06:45 ITV2 Nightscreen

20:00 Yellowstone

07:00 Emmerdale

21:00 Hidden Killers

09:50 Coronation Street

22:00 Crimes of Passion

12:15 The X Factor

08:50 Countrywise Kitchen

23:35 Could We Survive a

13:15 The Xtra Factor

09:20 The Royal

Mega-Tsunami?

13:45 You've Been Framed!

10:20 The Royal

00:40 Backdraft 03:20 Cheers 03:45 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 World of Sport: Last Orders 07:05 Cheers 07:30 Cheers 07:55 Cheers 08:20 Cheers 08:45 Cheers 09:15 Motorsport UK 10:15 Bundesliga Football Highlights 11:15 UEFA Champions League Weekly 11:50 The Manchurian Candidate 14:20 Touring Car Legends 15:25 Touring Car Legends 16:25 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 18:00 Touring Car Legends 19:00 Storage Wars 19:30 Storage Wars 20:00 Storage Wars 20:25 Storage Wars 21:00 River Monsters 22:00 Moonraker

The Incredible Hulk ITV2 - 20:05

Science-fiction action adventure based on the Marvel comic, starring Edward Norton, Liv Tyler, William Hurt and Tim Roth. Army physicist Bruce Banner is exposed to gamma radiation during an experiment that turns him into an incredibly strong green giant in moments of emotional stress. He flees to Brazil in the hope of finding a cure, but ruthless general Thaddeus "Thunderbolt" Ross is keen to exploit Banner's condition for the military and sends a soldier of fortune to apprehend him.

14:45 You've Been Framed! 15:50 You've Been Framed! 16:15 Valiant

04:10 ITV3 Nightscreen 04:40 Emmerdale

07:45 Countrywise Kitchen 08:20 Countrywise Kitchen

11:25 Columbo: Murder with Too Many Notes

17:55 Nanny McPhee & the

13:20 Vanity Fair

Big Bang

16:10 Gosford Park

20:05 The Incredible Hulk 22:20 The Xtra Factor 22:50 The Job Lot 23:15 Celebrity Juice

18:55 Inspector Morse 21:00 Rosemary & Thyme 22:00 Midsomer Murders

Friday, October 3, 2014

5th

SUNDAY DOMINGO

00:50 The Football League Show 02:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:15 BBC News 07:00 Formula 1 10:15 The Andrew Marr Show 11:15 Sunday Morning Live 12:15 Sunday Politics 13:30 MOTD2 Extra 14:00 BBC News 14:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 14:15 Formula 1 16:15 Escape to the Country 17:00 Points of View 17:15 The Great British Bake Off 18:15 Songs of Praise 18:55 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:20 Countryfile 20:20 Strictly Come Dancing 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 Our Girl 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:30 Match of the Day 2

00:00 00:25 00:45 01:05 01:30 01:50 02:10 02:30 03:00 Night 2014 04:00 04:30 05:00 20:00 20:55 21:40 23:00 23:25 23:45

Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Family Guy Bad Education Seann Walsh's Late Comedy Spectacular Impractical Jokers Impractical Jokers Close Formula 1 Doctor Who Kung Fu Panda 2 Family Guy Family Guy Bad Education

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS

OCTOBER

00:30 The Good Shepherd

01:25 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 03:05 This Is BBC Two 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Fort Boyard Ultimate 06:50 Countryfile Challenge 07:25 Pat & Stan 07:50 Gardeners' World 07:35 Pat & Stan 07:40 Dino Dan: Trek's 08:20 The Beechgrove Garden Adventures 07:50 Dino Dan: Trek's Adventures 08:50 Match of the Day 08:05 Canimals 08:10 Canimals 10:10 The Football League 08:20 Om Nom Stories 08:25 Sooty Show 08:40 Mr Bean: The Animated Series 08:50 Ultimate Spider-Man 11:30 Live Athletics 09:20 Nerds & Monsters 09:30 Big Time Rush 14:30 Saturday Kitchen Best 10:00 The Aquabats! Super Show! Bites 10:25 ITV News 10:30 Dickinson's Real Deal 11:30 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 The Alamo 12:30 ITV News and Weather 12:39 ITV Meridian Weather 18:05 Super League 12:40 Carry On at Your Convenience 19:05 Flog It! 14:25 Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties 20:00 Jungle Atlantis 16:00 The X Factor 17:10 Downton Abbey 18:15 All Star Family Fortunes 21:00 Wonders of the 19:00 Off Their Rockers 19:30 ITV Meridian Weather Monsoon 19:30 ITV News Meridian 19:45 ITV News and Weather 22:00 Sacred Rivers with 20:00 Sunday Night at the Palladium Simon Reeve 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Downton Abbey 23:05 ITV News and Weather 23:00 Mock the Week 23:19 ITV Meridian Weather 23:20 Piers Morgan's Life 23:30 QI XL Stories

00:40 Rude Tube

00:35 Top of the Pops: 1979

00:00 The X Factor

00:00 Death on the Nile

00:40 Maximum Conviction

01:10 Sounds of the Eighties

01:20 The Xtra Factor

02:45 World Kitchen

02:45 Sports Life Stories

01:35 Sounds of the Eighties

01:45 Billy Madison

03:10 ITV3 Nightscreen

02:05 The Richest Songs in

03:20 Two and a Half Men

the World

03:30 Teleshopping

04:00 Teleshopping

03:45 Teleshopping

07:00 World Kitchen

07:00 World of Sport: Dare

03:35 Yellowstone 04:35 Close 20:00 Timewatch 21:00 Cleopatra: Portrait of a Killer 22:00 The Secret Life of Bob Monkhouse 23:30 Arena

06:45 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 Ben and Kate 07:25 Ben and Kate 07:50 Emmerdale 10:30 Coronation Street 13:00 The X Factor 14:15 The Xtra Factor 14:45 You've Been Framed!

Welcome To The Jungle Five - 21:05

Energetic action comedy adventure starring The Rock and Seann William Scott. A weary Mob "retrievals expert" who's desperate to go straight is given one final job: recovering his boss's double-dealing son from the Brazilian jungle. He thinks it's going to be plain sailing - until he runs into local rebel fighters and an unhinged, gold-mining despot.

01:40 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 02:40 Homeland 03:40 Hollyoaks 05:45 Deal or No Deal 06:40 Win It Cook It 07:10 How I Met Your Mother 07:35 How I Met Your Mother 08:00 Volkswagen Racing Cup 08:30 NFL: The American Football Show 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:25 The Big Bang Theory 13:50 Channel 4 Racing 17:00 The Legend of Zorro 19:30 Channel 4 News 20:00 Posh Pawn 21:00 Operation Maneater 22:00 The Descendants

07:25 A Touch of Frost 09:20 Carry On Follow That

00:20 World War II in Colour 01:15 SuperCasino 04:10 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:25 Angels of Jarm 06:35 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Angelina Ballerina 07:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:35 Seaside Antics 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:55 Chloe's Closet 08:05 Olly the Little White Van 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Make Way for Noddy 08:40 City of Friends 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Wanda and the Alien 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Meerkat Manor 11:25 Police Interceptors 12:20 Police Interceptors 13:20 Police Interceptors 14:15 Ultimate Police Interceptors 15:10 Paul Blart: Mall Cop 17:00 Big Momma's House 2 18:55 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory 21:00 5 News Weekend 21:05 Welcome to the Jungle 23:00 The Punisher

03:40 Movies Now 03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen

Devils 07:05 Cheers 07:30 Cheers

Camel

07:50 Cheers

11:15 Heartbeat

08:15 Cheers

12:20 Heartbeat

08:45 British Touring Car Championship Highlights

13:20 Inspector Morse

10:15 I Want That Car

15:25 Rosemary & Thyme

11:15 The New Avengers 12:20 The New Avengers

15:45 You've Been Framed!

16:30 Carry On Again Doctor

16:15 Space Jam

18:20 Columbo: Lady in

17:55 Scooby-Doo 2:

Waiting

14:55 Highway Patrol

Monsters Unleashed

20:00 Lewis

15:25 The Manchurian

20:00 Wild Wild West

22:00 The Best of the Royal

22:00 The Xtra Factor

Variety

21:00 Premiership Rugby

23:00 Bad Bridesmaid

23:00 The Queen

Union

13:25 Ax Men 14:25 Motorway Patrol

Candidate 18:00 Superman

22:00 Open Range

Friday, October 3, 2014

MONDAY LUNES

6th

OCTOBER

00:55 I Love You, Man 02:35 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:40 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Home Away from Home 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 Inside Out 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 Have I Got a Bit More News for You

00:15 The Greatest 01:50 The Black Balloon 03:20 Countryfile 04:20 Holby City 05:15 This Is BBC Two 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Saints and Scroungers 08:50 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 09:20 The Housing Enforcers 10:05 James May's Cars of the People 11:05 Lorraine Pascale: How to Be a Better Cook 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 A Taste of My Life 14:30 Ready Steady Cook 15:15 Cash in the Attic 16:00 The Life of Mammals 17:00 Coast 17:45 Great British Railway Journeys 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Only Connect 22:00 The Kitchen 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:20 Premiership Rugby Union 01:15 The Store 03:30 Motorsport UK 04:20 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 05:05 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes? 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 The Undriveables 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Grantchester 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 The Agenda

00:15 Ghosts of Girlfriends Past 02:20 American Football Live 06:10 Volkswagen Racing Cup 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The King of Queens 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Four in a Bed 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 13:35 Four in a Bed 14:10 Four in a Bed 14:40 Four in a Bed 15:10 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Jamie's Comfort Food 21:30 Gadget Man 22:00 24 Hours in Police Custody 23:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 23:50 Bouncers

01:20 Criminals: Caught on Camera 02:10 SuperCasino 04:10 The Gadget Show 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make It Big 06:15 Angels of Jarm 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Pip Ahoy! 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Trust 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Gadget Show 21:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 22:00 Too Tough to Teach? 23:00 Under the Dome 23:55 Next

00:15 00:40 01:00 02:30 03:00 03:30 04:30 05:00 20:00 Show 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

00:30 Explosions: How We Shook the World 01:30 Wild Boys: The Story of Duran Duran 02:20 TOTP2: Duran Duran Special 02:50 Timewatch 03:50 Arena 04:50 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:25 Weather 20:30 Great British Railway Journeys 21:00 Gardens in Time 22:00 Lost Kingdoms of Central America 23:00 Timewatch 23:55 Detectorists

00:00 Tricked 01:00 The X Factor 02:00 The Xtra Factor 03:00 Two and a Half Men 03:25 Life's Funniest Moments 03:45 Teleshopping 06:45 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 You've Been Framed! 07:25 You've Been Framed! 07:45 Emmerdale 08:15 Coronation Street 08:45 Coronation Street 09:15 The Cube 10:15 Winners & Losers 11:15 Ben and Kate 11:45 Up All Night 12:10 Dinner Date: Australia 13:15 Emmerdale 13:45 Coronation Street 14:15 Coronation Street 14:50 The Jeremy Kyle Show 15:55 The Jeremy Kyle Show 17:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:05 You've Been Framed! 18:30 You've Been Framed! 19:00 Royal Pains 20:00 Two and a Half Men 20:30 Two and a Half Men 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Release the Hounds 23:00 Plebs 23:30 Dapper Laughs on the Pull

01:05 William and Mary 02:10 William and Mary 03:00 Judge Judy 03:25 Judge Judy 03:45 World Kitchen 04:10 ITV3 Nightscreen 04:40 Emmerdale 07:00 The Upper Hand 07:25 Heartbeat 08:25 Wild at Heart 09:25 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 10:35 Judge Judy 11:00 Judge Judy 11:25 Judge Judy 11:55 Inspector Morse 14:05 Heartbeat 15:10 Wild at Heart 16:10 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 17:20 Second Thoughts 17:55 Never the Twain 18:25 On the Buses 19:00 Heartbeat 20:00 Judge Judy 20:30 Judge Judy 21:00 Wycliffe 22:00 The Crime Thriller Club 23:00 Trial & Retribution

00:50 03:00 03:30 03:50 04:00 07:00 Firsts 07:15 07:40 08:00 08:25 08:50 09:55 10:55 11:55 12:25 12:55 14:00 15:00 15:25 16:00 16:25 16:55 17:55 19:00 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00

American Dad! American Dad! Kidulthood Bad Education Impractical Jokers Don't Drop the Baby Bad Education Close The Women's Football World's Craziest Fools Junior Paramedics Hotel of Mum and Dad Sexy Beasts EastEnders

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS

Too Tough To Teach? Five - 22:00

2/2. The concluding part of the documentary following boys with severe and complex behavioural problems who attend Ian Mikardo High School in Tower Hamlets, east London. James is 11 and has just joined Year 7 after being excluded from his previous school for violent behaviour. At first, he refuses to speak to staff, but it's not long before his intimidating attitude surfaces and he directs his anger towards classmate Perrie. After five years at Ian Mikardo, Calvin is forced to think about life beyond the school and emotions run high as he prepares for his 10-hour GCSE art exam.

8 Mile Motorway Patrol Highway Patrol ITV4 Nightscreen Teleshopping World of Sport: TV Motorway Patrol Highway Patrol Cheers Cheers The Professionals Kojak Magnum, PI Pawn Stars Pawn Stars The New Avengers The Professionals Motorway Patrol Highway Patrol Pawn Stars Pawn Stars Kojak Magnum, PI The New Avengers Pawn Stars Pawn Stars Storage Wars Storage Wars Storage Wars Storage Wars Ax Men

Friday, October 3, 2014

TUESDAY MARTES

7th

OCTOBER

00:20 Room 101 - Extra Storage 01:00 The Graham Norton Show 01:45 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:50 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Home Away from Home 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC Music Performance 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 The Driver 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 My Big Beautiful Wedding Dress

00:20 Today at Conference 00:50 Long Shadow 01:50 Scrappers 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools - Poets in Person 05:30 Schools - Simon Armitage, Writing Poems 06:00 Schools - Once Upon a Time 06:45 Bringing Books to Life 06:45 Bringing Books to Life 06:50 Bringing Books to Life 06:50 Bringing Books to Life 06:55 Bringing Books to Life 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Saints and Scroungers 08:50 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 09:20 The Housing Enforcers 10:05 Antiques Roadshow 11:05 Food & Drink 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 A Taste of My Life 14:30 Cash in the Attic 15:00 The Life of Mammals 16:00 Gymnastics 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Horizon 22:00 Human Universe 23:00 Later Live - with Jools Holland 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:20 Billy Connolly's Big Send Off 01:15 Jackpot247 04:00 UEFA Champions League Weekly 04:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 05:10 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes? 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 21:00 The Pride of Britain Awards 2014 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 Forgetting Sarah Marshall

00:45 NFL: The American Football Show 01:45 Miss Lovely 03:35 Mammon 04:45 Double Indemnity 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The King of Queens 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Four in a Bed 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 13:35 Four in a Bed 14:05 Four in a Bed 14:40 Four in a Bed 15:10 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Stand Up to Cancer 21:00 Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners 22:00 Ramsay's Costa del Nightmares 23:00 Gogglebox

01:40 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:05 SuperCasino 04:10 No Foreigners Here 100% British 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Pip Ahoy! 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Out of the Woods 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Meerkat Manor 20:30 5 News Update 20:30 The Secret Life of Pets 21:00 Criminals: Caught on Camera 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 NCIS

00:00 Family Guy 00:25 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 American Dad! 01:30 Hotel of Mum and Dad 02:30 Sexy Beasts 03:00 Don't Drop the Baby 04:00 Hotel of Mum and Dad 05:00 Close 20:00 Top Gear 21:00 Free Speech 22:00 Don't Tell the Bride 23:00 Bad Education 23:30 The Revolution Will Be Televised

00:25 Ancient Apocalypse 01:15 Cleopatra: Portrait of a Killer 02:15 The Wonder of Animals 02:45 Gardens in Time 03:45 Lost Kingdoms of Central America 04:45 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:25 Weather 20:30 BBC Music Performance 20:30 Great British Railway Journeys 21:00 Great British Railway Journeys 21:30 World War One at Home 22:00 Elizabeth Taylor: England's Other Elizabeth 22:55 The Richard Burton Diaries 23:25 4,000 Year Old Cold Case: The Body in the Bog

00:00 00:50 01:20 01:50 02:15 02:35 03:25 06:55 07:00 07:25 07:45 08:15 08:45 09:15 10:15 11:15 11:45 12:10 13:15 13:45 14:15 14:50 15:55 17:00 18:05 18:30 19:00 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

00:05 William and Mary 01:05 Above Suspicion 02:05 Judge Judy 02:25 Judge Judy 02:50 Movies Now 03:00 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 The Upper Hand 07:25 Heartbeat 08:20 Wild at Heart 09:25 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 10:35 Judge Judy 11:00 Judge Judy 11:25 Judge Judy 11:55 Inspector Morse 14:05 Heartbeat 15:10 Wild at Heart 16:10 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 17:25 Second Thoughts 17:55 Never the Twain 18:30 On the Buses 19:05 Heartbeat 20:05 Judge Judy 20:30 Judge Judy 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 Trial & Retribution

00:00 Bundesliga Football Highlights 01:00 Premiership Rugby Union 02:00 Motorsport UK 03:00 The Professionals 03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Greatest World Cup Matches 07:15 Motorway Patrol 07:40 Highway Patrol 08:00 Cheers 08:25 Cheers 08:55 The Professionals 09:55 Kojak 10:55 Magnum, PI 11:55 Pawn Stars 12:25 Pawn Stars 12:55 The New Avengers 14:00 The Professionals 15:00 Motorway Patrol 15:30 Highway Patrol 16:00 Pawn Stars 16:25 Pawn Stars 16:55 Kojak 17:55 Magnum, PI 18:55 The New Avengers 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 World Rally Championship Highlights 22:00 Benidorm 23:00 Backdraft

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS

The Pride of Britain Awards 2014 ITV - 21:00

The great and good of our nation come together to celebrate the country's unsung heroes for the 16th annual ceremony. Carol Vorderman hosts the event, which is once more held at London's Grosvenor House. Prince Charles and Prime Minister David Cameron will be in attendance, along with celebrities including Stephen Fry, Amanda Holden, Tom Jones, Katherine Kelly, and gold medal-winning Olympians Chris Hoy and Bradley Wiggins. Among those up for awards are a woman who has fostered 1,200 children, the British man who invented the world wide web, and there's a posthumous honour for Stephen Sutton, whose cancer battle inspired millions. It's always an emotional event that leaves many attendees and those watching at home in tears. Hopefully, Carol will be wearing waterproof mascara.

Viral Tap The Job Lot Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men Release the Hounds Teleshopping ITV2 Nightscreen Ben and Kate Up All Night Emmerdale Coronation Street Coronation Street The Cube Winners & Losers Ben and Kate Up All Night Royal Pains Emmerdale Coronation Street Coronation Street The Jeremy Kyle Show The Jeremy Kyle Show The Jeremy Kyle Show You've Been Framed! You've Been Framed! Royal Pains Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men You've Been Framed! Tricked Celebrity Juice Not Another Teen Movie

Friday, October 3, 2014

WEDNESDAY MIERCOLES

8th

OCTOBER

00:35 The Street 01:35 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:40 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Home Away from Home 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 19:55 Party Political Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 Our Zoo 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport

00:20 Today at Conference 00:50 Wonders of the Monsoon 01:50 Hotel India 02:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools - Make a Musical 06:00 Schools: Your Paintings 06:30 Schools: Dance with the Elements 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Saints and Scroungers 08:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 09:15 The Housing Enforcers 10:00 Operation Stonehenge: What Lies Beneath 11:00 Penguins on a Plane: Great Animal Moves 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 15:15 Cash in the Attic 16:00 Gymnastics 18:15 Flog It! 18:55 Party Political Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 Britain's Greatest Pilot: The Extraordinary Story of Captain Winkle Brown 21:00 Long Shadow 22:00 Horizon 23:00 The Great British Bake Off: An Extra Slice 23:40 Weather 23:40 Newsnight

01:40 Jackpot247 04:00 Loose Women 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes? 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:25 Party Political Broadcast 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Celebrity Squares 22:00 Scott & Bailey 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 Through the Keyhole

00:05 Educating the East End 01:05 Poker 02:00 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:25 Trans World Sport 03:20 First Time Farmers 04:15 Thunder Island 05:25 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 05:40 Deal or No Deal 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The King of Queens 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Undercover Boss Canada 12:30 Four in a Bed 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 13:35 Four in a Bed 14:05 Four in a Bed 14:40 Four in a Bed 15:10 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Stand Up to Cancer 21:00 Sarah Beeny's Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Grand Designs 23:00 True Stories

00:55 Secrets & Lies 01:45 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:10 SuperCasino 04:10 Mummy's Little Murderer 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 House Doctor 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Pip Ahoy! 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 No Foreigners Here 100% British 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Gracie's Choice 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 Police Interceptors 21:00 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door 22:00 Can't Pay? We'll Take It Away 23:00 Wentworth Prison

00:00 Family Guy 00:25 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 American Dad! 01:30 Bad Education 02:00 The Revolution Will Be Televised 02:30 EastEnders 03:00 Free Speech 04:00 Don't Tell the Bride 05:00 Close 20:00 Top Gear 21:00 Hotel of Mum and Dad 22:00 Live at the Apollo 22:30 Live at the Apollo 23:00 Life and Death Row

00:25 Yellowstone 01:25 The Joy of the Single 02:30 Timewatch 03:25 World War One at Home 03:55 The Richard Burton Diaries 04:25 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:25 Weather 20:30 Great British Railway Journeys 21:00 Great British Railway Journeys 21:30 The Wonder of Animals 22:00 Downfall

01:45 Two and a Half Men 02:10 Two and a Half Men 02:35 Two and a Half Men 03:00 Two and a Half Men 03:25 Teleshopping 06:55 ITV2 Nightscreen 07:00 Ben and Kate 07:25 Up All Night 07:45 Emmerdale 08:45 You've Been Framed! 09:15 The Cube 10:15 Winners & Losers 11:15 Ben and Kate 11:45 Up All Night 12:10 Royal Pains 13:15 Emmerdale 14:15 You've Been Framed! 14:50 The Jeremy Kyle Show 15:55 The Jeremy Kyle Show 17:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 18:05 You've Been Framed! 18:30 You've Been Framed! 19:00 Royal Pains 20:00 Two and a Half Men 20:30 The World Is Not Enough 23:00 The Job Lot 23:30 Plebs

00:00 William and Mary 01:05 Above Suspicion 02:05 Judge Judy 02:30 Judge Judy 02:50 Movies Now 03:00 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 The Upper Hand 07:25 Heartbeat 08:20 Wild at Heart 09:25 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 10:35 Judge Judy 11:00 Judge Judy 11:25 Judge Judy 11:55 Inspector Morse 14:05 Heartbeat 15:10 Wild at Heart 16:10 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 17:20 Second Thoughts 17:55 Never the Twain 18:25 On the Buses 19:00 Heartbeat 20:00 Judge Judy 20:30 Judge Judy 21:00 Wycliffe 22:00 Long Lost Family 23:00 City Lights

01:45 River Monsters: Untold Stories 02:50 The Professionals 03:45 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 World of Sport: Petrol Heads 07:15 Motorway Patrol 07:40 Highway Patrol 08:00 Cheers 08:30 Cheers 08:50 The Professionals 09:55 Kojak 10:55 Magnum, PI 11:55 Pawn Stars 12:25 Pawn Stars 12:55 The New Avengers 14:00 The Professionals 15:00 Motorway Patrol 15:30 Highway Patrol 16:00 Pawn Stars 16:25 Pawn Stars 16:55 Kojak 17:55 Magnum, PI 18:55 The New Avengers 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 British Superbike Championship Highlights 22:00 River Monsters 23:00 Basic

DON’T MISS

Grand Designs Channel 4 - 22:00

6/10. Natasha Cargill wants to build a home shaped like two enormous periscopes in rural Norfolk, but to obtain planning permission, she has to ensure not only that the materials are sustainable, but also agree to measure the transportation used to deliver them. If these strict criteria are not met, she won't be allowed to live there, and to add to the pressure, she has just £330,000 to spend on construction and six months to complete the project. Kevin McCloud follows her progress.

Friday, October 3, 2014

THURSDAY JUEVES

9th

OCTOBER

00:05 Stacey Dooley Investigates 01:05 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:10 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Rip Off Britain 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 BBC Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Perfection 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Home Away from Home 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Your Home in Their Hands 22:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 BBC Regional News and Weather 23:35 Question Time

00:40 Today at Conference 01:10 Sacred Rivers with Simon Reeve 02:10 Who Do You Think You Are? 03:10 Doctor Who 04:00 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools - Making Media 05:30 Schools: Fazer's Urban Takeover 06:00 Schools: Your Paintings 06:30 Schools: Play On! 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Saints and Scroungers 08:50 Break-in Britain - The Crackdown 09:20 The Housing Enforcers 10:05 Horizon 11:05 Gardeners' World 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 A Taste of My Life 14:30 Ready Steady Cook 15:15 Cash in the Attic 16:00 Gymnastics 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing It Takes Two 20:00 The Great British Bake Off Masterclass 21:00 Horizon 22:00 Peaky Blinders 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 The Undriveables 01:10 Jackpot247 03:30 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Who's Doing the Dishes? 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:45 Emmerdale 20:15 Live International Football 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 International Football Highlights

00:05 24 Hours in Police Custody 01:00 Four to the Floor 01:30 Undercover Boss USA 02:20 Gattu 03:35 In Search of Guru Dutt 05:05 Win It Cook It 05:30 Hugh's 3 Good Things: Best Bites 05:40 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The King of Queens 07:45 The King of Queens 08:10 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 3rd Rock from the Sun 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Frasier 11:30 Undercover Boss Canada 12:25 Four in a Bed 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Four in a Bed 13:35 Four in a Bed 14:05 Four in a Bed 14:40 Four in a Bed 15:10 A Place in the Sun: Summer Sun 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 Stand Up to Cancer 21:00 Location, Location, Location 22:00 Educating the East End 23:00 Scrotal Recall 23:30 8 Out of 10 Cats

00:00 Mummy's Little Murderer 01:00 Dallas 01:45 True Crimes 02:10 SuperCasino 04:10 Too Tough to Teach? 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Pip Ahoy! 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Goodnight for Justice: the Measure of a Man 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News Tonight 20:00 The Gadget Show 21:00 Benefits Britain: Life on the Dole 22:00 No Foreigners Here 100% British 23:00 Kids Who Kill

00:00 Family Guy 00:25 Family Guy 00:45 American Dad! 01:10 American Dad! 01:30 The Revolution Will Be Televised 02:00 Bad Education 02:30 Life and Death Row 03:30 Hotel of Mum and Dad 04:30 The Revolution Will Be Televised 05:00 Close 20:00 Pop's Greatest Dance Crazes 20:30 Snog, Marry, Avoid? 21:00 Don't Tell the Bride 22:00 Don't Drop the Baby 23:00 Bluestone 42 23:30 EastEnders

00:30 Gardens in Time 01:30 Top of the Pops: 1979 02:05 Detectorists 02:35 World War One at Home 03:05 The Wonder of Animals 03:35 How the Wild West Was Won with Ray Mears 04:35 Close 20:00 World News Today 20:25 Weather 20:30 BBC Proms Chamber Music 21:00 Sound of Cinema: The Music That Made the Movies 22:00 Imagine 23:30 Jimi Hendrix: The Road to Woodstock

00:00 01:05 01:30 01:55 02:20 02:45 03:20 06:50 07:00 07:25 07:45 08:15 08:45 09:15 10:15 11:15 11:45 12:10 13:15 13:45 14:15 14:50 15:55 17:00 18:05 18:30 19:00 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

00:00 William and Mary 01:05 The Crime Thriller Club 02:05 Above Suspicion 02:55 Judge Judy 03:15 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping 07:00 The Upper Hand 07:25 Heartbeat 08:20 Wild at Heart 09:20 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 10:30 Judge Judy 10:55 Judge Judy 11:20 Judge Judy 11:50 Inspector Morse 14:05 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:05 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 17:20 Second Thoughts 17:55 Never the Twain 18:25 On the Buses 19:00 Heartbeat 20:00 Judge Judy 20:30 Judge Judy 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 Blue Murder

01:05 Vinnie Jones' Toughest Cops USA 02:05 The Professionals 03:05 Cheers 03:35 Cheers 04:00 Teleshopping 07:00 Greatest FA Cup Finals 07:15 Motorway Patrol 07:40 Highway Patrol 08:00 Cheers 08:30 Cheers 08:55 The Professionals 09:55 Kojak 10:55 Magnum, PI 12:00 Pawn Stars 12:25 Pawn Stars 12:55 The New Avengers 14:00 The Professionals 15:00 Motorway Patrol 15:30 Highway Patrol 16:00 Pawn Stars 16:25 Pawn Stars 16:55 Kojak 17:55 Magnum, PI 18:55 The New Avengers 20:00 Pawn Stars 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 The Car Chasers 21:30 The Car Chasers 22:00 Road Rage Britain: Caught on Camera 23:00 8 Mile

DONâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T MISS

Peaky Blinders BBC2 - 22:00

2/6. Many people were surprised when it was revealed that Tom Hardy had agreed to take a break from films to appear in the second series of this gangster drama. But he had good reasons for doing so - it reteamed him with his Dark Knight Rises co-star Cillian Murphy and Peaky Blinders creator Steven Knight, who wrote and directed Hardy's film Locke. There's also a role this season for the actor's real-life partner, Charlotte Riley. Hardy debuts this week as enigmatic mobster Alfie Solomons, who crosses paths with Tommy while the latter is in London searching for Polly's long-lost children. Solomons is a dangerous man, and Tommy will be lucky to get away unscathed. Meanwhile, ghosts from Arthur's military past continue to haunt his troubled mind.

Release the Hounds Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men Dads Fake Reaction Teleshopping ITV2 Nightscreen Ben and Kate Up All Night Emmerdale Coronation Street You've Been Framed! The Cube Winners & Losers Ben and Kate Up All Night Royal Pains Emmerdale Coronation Street You've Been Framed! The Jeremy Kyle Show The Jeremy Kyle Show The Jeremy Kyle Show You've Been Framed! You've Been Framed! Royal Pains Two and a Half Men Two and a Half Men You've Been Framed! Bad Bridesmaid Celebrity Juice Plebs

Friday, October 3, 2014

HigH Blood Pressure is not a disease, But a symPtom of a disease

How sad it is that the public and many doctors have come to believe that high blood pressure (HBP) or hypertension is a disease, and not a symptom of a disease. It is extremely rare that high blood pressure will occur without a cause. High blood pressure is not a disease. It is a symptom, just like cough or pain. Prescribing a patient a pill for high blood pressure for a life time, is like prescribing someone with chest pain a pain killer for life, without finding out the root cause of the chest pain. HBP can be triggered by many factors. From the outside, you have factors such as; high stress levels, poor nutrition, obesity, and exposure to toxic chemicals. From the inside of the body, HBP can be caused by diseases of several organ-systems. One of the commonest causes of high blood pressure, one that is detected very often at our clinic - MEDB, is atherosclerosis. Atherosclerosis is the hardening of

arteries. It can occur in any of the arteries of the body, more so in the arteries of the heart and kidneys. Atherosclerosis can be treated and reversed with high dose Omega-3 fatty acids, found in flax seeds and tuna ( be careful – tuna can be contaminated). Contrary to popular belief, atherosclerosis is not caused by high cholesterol, but by inflammation of the arteries mainly due to toxic free radicals produced inside the body. Diseases of the heart, liver, hormonal organs and nerves will all cause high blood pressure. At our clinic – MedB, we successfully reverse high blood pressure by treating the underlying causes detected with our full body scan. However, when a patient has been on blood pressure medication for a while, it becomes more difficult to reverse the disease because of the body´s dependence on the medication. Many prescription drugs also cause HBP by disrupting

DR MACHI MANNU’s ADvICe ClINIC eMAIl yoUR qUestIoNs AND CoMMeNts to CoNtACt@MeDb.es

I am a 47 year old woman, and I have had chronic pain all over my body and extreme tiredness since I was 30. I also always suffer from chest infections and abdominal problems. The pain I feel is not in the bones, but in my muscles. Over the years, I have been told I have many diseases – Fibromyalgia, Multiple Sclerosis, Chronic Fatigue syndrome, Rheumatoid arthritis etc. I have mostly been on many types of pain killers and steroids. Overall, I don´t think my medications are doing me much good. I have been looking at your website, and feel that you may be able to tell me why I have so many problems. Please help.

I have carried out diagnostic scans on people with similar symptoms and it´s very clear to me that there is a common thread that is revealed from the scans. What stands out from these scans usually, is the low state of the immune system. The immune system is usually found in a state of severe inflammation or degeneration, and the immune organs such as the thymus gland, bone marrow, and blood cells equally show signs of severe inflammation. Because of the lowered immune response, microorganisms especially viruses and fungi are able to invade the organ, where they lay dormant waiting for the right time to spread through the body. Some of the common viruses detected from the scans are human papilloma virus, cytomegalovirus, and herpes virus. It is not surprising that many people that have been diagnosed with Chronic fatigue syndrome or fibromyalgia, usually recall their problems being preceded by a cold or flulike illness. Your immune system not only protects you against infections, but is also responsible for protecting you against allergies and autoimmune diseases. Auto-immune diseases occur when the body starts producing antibodies against itself usually due to a dysfunction of the immune system. Many people with problems of chronic tiredness and pain also suffer from autoimmune disorders such as rheumatoid arthritis, gastritis, and diabetes. Your history of recurrent chest infections is also consistent with someone with an immune system dysfunction. Unfortunately, antibiotics which are commonly prescribed to get rid of infectious microbes, also lower the immune system. In addition to fighting harmful bacteria, antibiotics also destroy beneficial bacteria called probiotics. These probiotics fight against harmful bacteria, and produce a number of chemicals that boost the immune system. Researchers have also found that not only does harmful bacteria become resistant to antibiotics over time, but also the white blood cells, which are the body´s main defenders, become less able to recognise and kill off harmful bacteria when they are continuously exposed to antibiotics. To properly manage an illness, you have to think about healing the whole body, and not just the part presenting with a symptom. From your history, your immune system is most likely in a depleted state, and this will make you even more sensitive to a variety of chemical compounds, especially those found in processed foods . Increased sensitivity to chemicals will cause inflammation of the intestines and perhaps a ´leaky gut syndrome´. This means that chemicals can easily get into your body through the intestines. And since these are foreign chemicals, the body puts up a fight and starts producing antibodies. Overtime, the immune sys-

tem becomes completely overwhelmed and drained,and this is when other diseases starts to occur. Current research has shown that the lack of energy usually seen in people that have been diagnosed with chronic tiredness, chronic fatigue syndrome or similar conditions, may be suffering from an auto-immune disease of the mitochondria. The mitochondria are tiny organelles in our cells, that are responsible for generating energy. The mitochondria is easily damaged by toxins, and you can see how toxic chemicals in the body can cause chronic and worsening tiredness. The most important step for you to take is to do all you can to improve your immune system. Since you live in Spain, you can start with the most abundant and cheapest immune booster around , the sun. The sun is the best source of vitamin D, and when vitamin D levels are high, the immune system functions at its best. The early morning and late evening sunshine are the best times to enjoy the sun. At our clinic- MedB, we use Reishi and colostrum to maintain the immune system. Reishi is a mushroom that has a powerful modulating effect on the immune system. Colostrum contains antibodies and powerful antibiotics including several compounds known to positively influence the immune system. Colostrum also contains healing proteins and growth factors that accelerate healing in anyone with a chronic disease. To increase your energy levels, you should consider taking MitoQ. I cannot praise MitoQ enough. It has worked wonders for many people. MitoQ is a new energy boosting supplement that works deep inside your cells. For this reason, it increases energy levels, as well accelerates the healing of damaged aorgans in the body. MitoQ is recommended for people with Chronic tiredness, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, multiple sclerosis and many other diseases. To find out more visit www.mitoq.com or www.medb.es . Call 965071745 to order yours. Special price 43 Euros per bottle ( 60 caps). Free shipping to Spain.

the body´s blood pressure control mechanism. The goal at MedB clinic has been to find that one therapy that is able to prevent high blood pressure and heart disease by healing the damage done to the body, rather than covering up the symptoms. We found that therapy in MitoQ. MitoQ is a brand new supplement that works deep inside your cells to heal the damage done not just in the heart, but all over the body. To find out more about MitoQ, visit www.mitoq.com, or www.medb.es. Or Call :965071745.

Friday, October 3, 2014

beef ragU and pea Calzone

Calzone is the rebel of the pizza family INGREDIENTS

1 batch of basic pizza dough 2 tbsp olive oil 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped 300g/10Â˝oz beef mince 3 Italian pork sausages, removed from their skins and crumbled 100ml/3Â˝fl oz white wine 1 x 400g/14oz tin plum tomatoes, drained, rinsed and chopped 150g/5oz frozen peas 250g/9oz mozzarella, ripped into small bits 2 handfuls of basil

METHOD

In a large frying pan, heat the olive oil over a medium heat and cook the garlic until it begins to feel sticky, then add the beef and sausage meat. Season with a little salt and pepper and turn the heat up a little. Cook, stirring often, for five minutes until the meat is browned.Pour in the wine, wait three minutes, then add the tomatoes, peas and a splash of water. Simmer for 20 minutes.Preheat your oven to its highest setting and put two large flat trays inside to heat up. â&#x20AC;&#x2030; Divide the dough into two or four pieces and roll into large rounds. Place each one on a flour-dusted surface or plate. Spread the ragĂš evenly over the dough bases, leaving a 2cm edge. Scatter over the mozzarella and basil, then pick up one half and fold it over the other. Crimp the edges by pinching them, making sure the sauce doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leak out. Carefully transfer to the hot trays and place in the very hot oven for 15â&#x20AC;&#x2018;20 minutes until the surface is golden and puffed up. Eat immediately.

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Friday, October 3, 2014

Horoscopes Aries March 21 - April 19 Sympathetic Venus eases recent tensions in a close friendship or alliance. Because you are prepared to listen, others could well climb down off the fence and come halfway to meet you, so do not feel that you should stand your ground or issue ultimatums. New people you meet could also have a lot to offer, so plan to socialise from Thursday.

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Reorganising your routine to give yourself more time to follow up on recent leads and win support from those who count should be your priority this week. Whether you decide to cut loose from a situation that you find restrictive or stay the course a short while longer could depend on something you discover by chance later in the week.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 The emphasis is now on growth and change, self-expression and emotional fulfilment, so do not let existing work commitments hold you back. If you trust your judgment and back a hunch midweek, you could also win support from someone in a key position. It seems a certain situation is not cast in stone, so take a confident, upbeat approach.

Cancer June 21 - July 22 Domestic tensions can be overcome and left behind in weeks to come, so do not dwell on past misunderstandings or feel that you should stand your ground just to prove a point. Diplomacy will get you further, faster, so hold your fire and be prepared to listen. A conversation later in the week could also help you draw up constructive plans.

By Pandora Leo July 23 - August 22 Communicating your real feelings to someone who is now important to you could help you bring about some kind of breakthrough in the week ahead. What matters now is reaching a new understanding that enables you to be yourself, and to ask for what you really want and need. You stand to gain far more than you could lose by showing your hand.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Your financial situation enters a more easygoing and successful phase this week. If you make your own decisions, you can also sidestep a potential problem, so do not listen to advice, however plausible it seems. A new idea also has the stars behind it, but do not make a rushed decision. You will find the right way forward if you slow down and take your time.

Libra September 23 - October 22 With your ruler, romantic and diplomatic Venus, in your sign throughout the month ahead, you should be at your most confident, creative and persuasive, so do not settle for short-term solutions or feel you must fit in with othersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; plans. Making someone close see life from your angle should be easy; just be yourself.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 As a Scorpio you do not show your feelings easily, and that should be even more the case while romantic Venus travels through the area of your skies that rules secrets and deep feelings in the month ahead. You are right to play a waiting game, so trust your intuition. You can also find out something that you need to know if you ask a probing question.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Between now and late October your social life comes first, so catch up with old friends and accept invitations to go out and meet new people. You could also find that you share common ground with someone you spend time with. Do not let your doubts, or a misunderstanding, make you hedge your bets in the weeks to come.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 With creative, diplomatic Venus in charge of your career until late October, you can make progress with a project and win round colleagues whose support you need to get ahead, so concentrate on building up a network of potential helpers in the week ahead. A conversation with a friend could also have far-reaching repercussions.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 If you take a more relaxed approach towards a certain situation, you will find a way to sidestep a potential problem and move forward. You are, in fact, ideally placed to push through important changes, so feign indifference and let others do the talking. Once you are sure of where you really stand, you could well find the battle is as good as won.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Reaching a new agreement with a friend or loved one that is based on real understanding could be easier than you thought. With persuasive, sympathetic Venus on your side, you could also find that recent opposition to your plans will crumble, so press home your advantage. There is no need to spell out where you stand.

Friday, October 3, 2014

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain eight years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Joe was having problems connecting to his new ADVICE: Marian wanted to know how to add gadgets to wireless Internet connection her Windows 7 computer

Hi Richard, our internet was re-set by the Provider and now laptop won't lock on to it. It says "settings saved on this computer for the network do not match the requirements of the network". The iPad attaches ok and it shows other networks that are close by, but my network shows a big red X. please?

Hi Joe, you need to remove the old wireless connection, you can do this by doing the following...

Hi Richard, when you delivered and set up our computer, we enjoyed the information strip in the top right corner, displaying clock, exchange rate and 3 day weather forecast for Santa Pola. When making Google our home page we lost that information. Could you assist us via Email with instructions on how to reinstate it Marian

3. Click 'Manage Wireless Networks' in the left hand panel

Hi Marian, it looks like you have deleted the Windows 7 gadgets, to get them back just right hand click anywhere on the desktop and click “gadgets”, you will be shown a number of gadgets, and you can just drag them and drop them onto the desktop where you want them.

4. Click the wireless network you wish to remove, then click 'Remove'

ADVICE: Tony wanted to get a gadget that he had lost back on the desktop

1. Right hand click the network icon in the bottom right hand corner of the screen (this looks like a wifi signal). 2. Click Open Network and Sharing Centre

5. Now close the windows and try to connect again to the wireless network, this time it should ask you for the new password.

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternately why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:-

Q A

Good Morning Richard, can you please tell us how we get our weather icon back on the computer please. We lost it last week and we don't know how to get it back. Thank you, Tony

Hi guys, I think you’re referring to the gadgets in Windows 7? You can add new gadgets by right hand clicking on the desktop (click any empty space on the desktop) and then select “gadgets”. From there you can click and drag whichever gadgets you want onto the desktop. Hope that helps.

www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form thats on any page except the front page.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Friday, October 3, 2014

fuel saving tips every driver should know 1. Make fewer trips

Did you know that when you drive a car that has been parked for a few hours, the engine is cold and it uses much more fuel for the first five miles or so? Ideally you'd combine all your daily errands into one big trip. Often that's not possible if you have to pop out during the day to drop off and collect the family, but try not to go out separately to do the supermarket shop or buy a newspaper.

2. Don't drive in the rush hour

There are few worse places to spend your time than stuck in a traffic jam, but it's also a very expensive way of travelling. Every time that you stop and start in traffic, your car needs first gear and a huge amount of fuel to get moving again. Second gear is not much better. The best solution is to not travel during the rush hour. You can also save some fuel by trying to understand what the traffic is doing in front of you, and travelling steadily at a slow speed, rather than accelerating and braking. If you have to travel in rush hour a lot, then you could consider buying a hybrid car, which uses much less fuel in town than a normal petrol or diesel.

3. Close the windows and sunroof, if you've got one)

It's not so much of a problem when you're driving in town (see above), but when you're out of town or on the motorway and moving more quickly, the shape of your car is very important. Car designers call it aerodynamics and make lots of effort to reduce the 'drag' and make the car as sleek as possible. Anything that makes wind noise as your car goes along is actually making your car more expensive to run. You can't do much about the design of your car, but you can avoid making it worse by not leaving the windows and sunroof open. It's better to use the air vents for most of the year, and the air-conditioning when it gets too hot.

4. Remove the roof rack or ski box

This is just like leaving the windows open, but worse. Even if the roof rack is empty, it increases drag and makes your car use more fuel, while a big ski box is like having another car strapped to your roof. The latest roof racks and ski boxes are quick and easy to fit and remove, so make the effort to stow them away when you're not using them.

5. Don't carry round unnecessary weight

Just like your body, your car needs more fuel to move around more weight. So, just as you wouldn't wear a heavy rucksack unless you had to, don't cart stuff around in the boot of your car unless you need it. Ironically, the heavier the item (the usual culprits are golf clubs and trolleys), the less likely you are to bother taking it out of the boot and the greater the effect it will have on your fuel consumption.

6. Stick speed limit

the

If you ignored the law, you could shave a bit of time off your journey by travelling above the speed limit, particularly on long motorway trips. But, although you might arrive about 20 minutes early on a 200-mile trip by travelling at 80mph instead of 70mph, it's also a false economy. While the car is running for 20 minutes less, it uses much more fuel when it is travelling. That 20 minutes could cost you up to 7euro extra in fuel.

Friday, October 3, 2014

CODE CRACKER

Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week's puzzle, 2 represents L and 6 represents K, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES

QUICKIE

Across 1 Go read new bookmark (3-3) 4 They all moved at the same pace for the arch (6) 9 Tear bit off cleric’s cap (7) 10 Dirt in jug rim edge (5) 11 Plant at the southern border (5) 12 Tried to work out in Michigan (7) 13 Horrid ashes produced pungent condiment (11) 18 Plenty follow old church cats (7) 20 Light wood from herbal samples (5) 22 Little Alfred returned with me, sweetheart (5) 23 Bodyguards for the lawless sectors (7) 24 Tool for one who’s over the top on stage (6) 25 Lower to catch the girl (6) STANDARD CLUES

Across 1 Permit (5) 4 Sequence (5) 6 Before (3) 7 Hangs about (5) 8 Comes round (5) 10 Owns (3) 12 Tempo (4) 14 Contract (4) 15 Loud (5) 16 Elderly (4) 18 Be paid (4) 20 Gamble (3) 22 Dish up (5) 23 Picture (5) 24 Snooze (3)

25 Uninterested (5) 26 Ledge (5) Down 2 Smallest amount (5) 3 Clean (4) 4 Bovines (4) 5 Foot joint (5) 7 Shrieks (7) 9 Stillness (7) 11 Get up (5) 13 Finish (3) 14 Colouring (3) 17 Mistake (5) 19 Conscious (5) 20 Curve (4) 21 Hints (4)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Moist, 4 Midst, 7 Nightmare, 8 Sick, 10 Boxer, 12 Minuet, 13 Stub, 16 Terminate, 18 Hilly, 19 Signs. Down: 1 Minus, 2 Inn, 3 Toga, 4 Mutton, 5 Dialect, 6 Toes, 9 Control, 11 Verify, 12 Match, 14 Basis, 15 Bass, 17 Egg.

Scribble Pad

Across 1 Page marker (3-3) 4 Keeping pace (6) 9 Roman Catholic priest’s hat (7) 10 Filth (5) 11 Rush-like plant (5) 12 Motor City (7) 13 Plant root used for seasoning (11) 18 Panther cats (7) 20 Strong lightweight wood (5) 22 Blaze (5) 23 Accompanies (7) 24 Mallet (6) 25 Posterior (6)

Down 1 Pollute seabed badly (6) 2 Wounded in the Al Gore dining room (5) 3 In German them strange hymns (7) 5 Fall behind it at the end of the day (5) 6 They have three legs, so drops it by mistake (7) 7 Fast passage for others in shipping line (6) 8 In serious difficulties with herds spread all over the place (4,7) 14 Swimming stroke not used by Chappell in infamous cricket match (4,3) 15 She came out with frilly lace, a disaster! (7) 16 Sponge found in toilet, note (6) 17 Was confused in her cable (6) 19 Huge gong around middle of chests (5) 21 Leafy tree left on a Roman Catholic hospital (5) Down 1 Humiliate (6) 2 Injured by a bull (5) 3 Songs of praise (7) 5 Hours of darkness (5) 6 Camera stands (7) 7 Suddenly (6) 8 Short of (4,7) 14 Bowling style (4,3) 15 Disaster (7) 16 Washing sponge (6) 17 Large rope (6) 19 Overweight (5) 21 Conifer (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Awed, 3 Contract, 9 Protest, 10 Plane, 11 Thyme, 12 Abroad, 14 Tussle, 16 Panama, 19 Gamble, 21 Ovoid, 24 Ouija, 25 Orifice, 26 Sing sing, 27 Gnat. Down: 1 Appetite, 2 Ebony, 4 Outlaw, 5 Taper, 6 Alabama, 7 Tees, 8 Repeal, 13 Bawdiest, 15 Sea-lion, 17 Adonis, 18 Bemoan, 20 Brass, 22 Onion, 23 Rods.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words An As At By He Hi If Ma Of Or So Up 3 letter words Ate Boo Dog Ear Eat

Gag Gap Lob Née Oft Red Tie 5 letter words Abash Afoot Alert Alias Alien Aloes Aorta Arose Aural Catch Catty

Chase Cleat Colds Dooms Highs Lagos Manos Maths Opera Pants Pasta Seals Sneak Steak Stoat Types Yeast

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 7 Solapas (de chaqueta) (6) 8 Dueños (de casa, coche, perro) (6) 9 Alone (4) 10 To warn (8) 11 Shelf (7) 13 Agua (5) 15 Acordar (precio, fecha) (5) 17 Lemonade (7) 20 El más sucio (8) 21 Seguro (4) 22 White (f) (6) 23 Goma de borrar (6)

Down 1 Canoes (6) 2 Hay (4) 3 Enamel (7) 4 Dust (in house, on ground) (5) 5 Aumentar (tamaño) (8) 6 Llegar (movimiento, destino, procedencia) (6) 12 Olive (8) 14 Pareja (compañero) (7) 16 Cricket (insect) (6) 18 Frying pan (6) 19 Retraso (5) 21 Chasquido (de dedos) (4)

Friday, October 3, 2014 Across 1 In which city in northeastern Massachusetts did witchcraft trials take place in 1692? (5) 4 What name is given to any of several related languages of the Celts in Ireland and Scotland? (6) 9 Which regulatory substance is produced in an organism and transported in tissue fluids such as blood or sap to stimulate specific cells or tissues into action? (7) 10 What was the surname of the first woman to sit in the House of Commons? (5) 11 What is the name of the period preceding Easter, which in the Christian Church is devoted to fasting, abstinence, and penitence in commemoration of Christ’s fasting in the wilderness? (4) 12 Which British 80s pop duo consisted of Vince Clarke and Andy Bell? (7) 13 Which small domesticated carnivorous mammal with soft fur, has a short snout, and retractile claws? (3) 14 What was the title of the former monarch of Iran? (4) 16 What was the name of glam-rock band fronted by guitarist, singer and songwriter Marc Bolan? (1,3) 18 Balmoral Castle stands on which river? (3) 20 What is the surname of the dramatist who wrote the 1956 play Look Back in Anger? (7) 21 Who was the Greek goddess of victory? (4) 24 What name is given to the final and fully developed adult stage of an insect? (5)

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

25 What is the name of the platform extending into an auditorium, along which models parade to display clothes in fashion shows? (7) 26 What word can mean both ‘slightly drunk’ and ‘very small’? (6)

27 Which river that rises in eastern Cambridgeshire and flows eastward through East Anglia, forms most of the county boundary between Suffolk and Essex? (5) Down 1 What was the surname of the creator of the Peanuts cartoon strip? (6) 2 What was the surname of the Italian actress who married film producer Carlo Ponti in 1957? (5) 3 What name is given to any natural satellite of a planet? (4) 5 What name is given to a menu having individual dishes listed with separate prices? (1,2,5) 6 Which cultivated plant of the daisy family has edible leaves that are often an ingredient of salads? (7) 7 What name is given to an association of manufacturers or suppliers with the purpose of maintaining prices at a high level and restricting competition? (6) 8 Which headgear is a round flattish cap of felt or cloth typically worn by French peasants? (5) 13 What is the name of the stick of black carbon material used for drawing? (8) 15 What was the surname of the American science-fiction writer who founded Scientology? (7) 17 What name was given to a local, district, or national council in the former USSR? (6) 18 What name is given to a score of 40 all in a game of tennis? (5) 19 What is the surname of the first unseeded player to win the Wimbledon men’s singles title? (6) 22 Boise is the capital and largest city of which US state? (5) 23 Elisha who invented the safety elevator? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH Every week we’ll be covering a different topic to help readers enlarge their Spanish vocabulary. This week we start with: Esta semana – Comida Basica - This week – Basic Food

Busca estas comidas en la sopa de letras. -Look for the basic food items in the wordsearch

1. What is the correct name for food permitted under Moslem laws? 2. On Mohs' Scale of Hardnest, the hardest is diamond what's the softest? 3. Who designed the first 'Iron' ship for Great Britain in 1845? 4. Name the famous English artist who painted mostly horses? 5. What is studied in the science of somatology? 6. Who was nicknamed 'The desert Fox'? 7. What are Munroes? 8. What does a geophage enjoy? 9. Gondolas in Venice are traditionally what colour? 10. What tanker caused a severe oil spill in 1989? 11. There are 16 bottles of Champagne in a what? 12. Shane Fenton is better known as? 13. What country had an airline called Rottnest? 14. Tigers have stripped fur, what colour is their skin? 15. What city was once called York? ANSWERS 1. Hal-al 2. Talc 3. I. Kingdom Brunel 4. George Stubbs 5. The Body 6. Erwin Rommel 7. Mountains in Scotland 8. Eating earth 9. Black 10. Exxon Valdez (Alaska) 11. Balthazar 12. Alvin Stardust 13. Australia 14. Stripped 15. Toronto, by British governor 1793

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across: 7 Oberon, 8 Palate, 10 Anemone, 11 Stern, 12 Iris, 13 Sewer, 17 Haunt, 18 Kate, 22 OJays, 23 Adam Ant, 24 Egg nog, 25 Spells. Down: 1 Horatio, 2 Genesis, 3 Robot, 4 Banshee, 5 Hades, 6 Henna, 9 Perennial, 14 Bassoon, 15 Parable, 16 Vectis, 19 Bogey, 20 Tango, 21 Harpo.

ARROZ GJ HA CY F V E MB D B A I M AZUCAR P CB A K NF E CAFE X E HL OOX E T T Z E F A QR CARNE E L T MJ OU B CHOCOLATE RZ ORRA E K FRITAS NK OE UNS K E I MMC GOJ FRUTAHELADO RA CUZ A OO HUEVOS A R X WE A M Y H E L A D O M C JAMONLECHE A S P OL L OD MERMELADA B J V X B F CX PAN WS J B O D C G

PASTA PATATAS PESCADO POLLO QUESO TERNERA VERDURAS VINO YOGURT ZUMO

xx You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.leche, 2.pan, 3.azucar, 4.queso, 5.fruta, 6.verduras, 7.arroz, 8.pasta, 9.cafe,

Soduko

a.cheese b.rice c.fruit d.milk e.bread f.pasta g.sugar h.vegetables i.ham

10.te, 11.yogurt, 12.jamon, 13.mermelada, 14.patatas fritas 15.tomates, 16.zumo, 17.vino, 18.carne,

Span - Eng

j.yogourt k.coffee l. jam m.tea n.meat o.eggs p.beef q.fish r.tomatoes

Quizword

19.huevos, 20.pollo, 21.ternera, 22.pescado, 23.chocolate, 24.helado

s.juice t.wine u.chicken v.icecream w.chips x.chocolate

Answers: 1d, 2e, 3g, 4a, 5c, 6h, 7b, 8f, 9k, 10m, 11j, 12i, 13l, 14w, 15r, 16s, 17t, 18n, 19o, 20u, 21p, 22q, 23x, 24v.

KidzTRIVIACorner QUIZ

P DF J UF L QA OGRHS A P T UA OP Z T T A V UP UA S E T E L MOU A S A A OHP CP L S NNA P ONN T DDCE OS O WO N M M A Z HRNNA T CA RK OJ I CV E RDUR P UB V X B F RS P I S Y K

Fill It In

Friday, October 3, 2014

Property

thediscountcard.es

Restaurants & Bars

Lifestyle & Services

Friday, October 3, 2014

AUCTIONS

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more. We cater for companies and self-employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ALCOhOLICS ANONYMOUS

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY

disabled facilities and a fresh recently painted interior. directbusinessbrokers .com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6435L 97,000€ Large successfully run leasehold Beauty Salon near Quesada. Spacious salon with 7 rooms and rental income from separate hair salon. All fitness machines, treatment beds and tables included in the sale. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6457L 42,000€ Excellent opportunity to purchase a well established and thriving leasehold Bar/Cafeteria in a central location in Torrevieja. Beautiful established garden and south west facing terrace with BBQ and all year

round trade. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6456L 20,000€ Lively, popular leasehold Bar & Restaurant in a lovely position on La Manga overlooking the port. Fully fitted kitchen and extensive sunny terraces. Freehold also available for purchase and flat above the premises. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6455L 150,000€ Profitable leasehold Café Bar, competitively priced for quick sale. Air conditioned interior with stylish decor and large terraces. Multiple income streams: food, drink, internet facilities, games and ice cream. Offering great potential for further growth. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81 Ref. DB6446L 74,950€ Beautifully presented leasehold Garden Furniture Business, recently reduced in price. A successful and easy to run business with established website, significant internet sales, customer database and excellent reputation locally. directbusinessbrokers.com Tel 966 44 33 81

ChOIR Casa Tom Community Choir: From 8 September 2014, Casa Tom Community Choir meets every Monday at 2.00pm for 2.30pm. It is a

mixed choir and all levels are welcome. No auditions, no solos. Make new friends and have a good time. Location: Casa Tom, Avenida JACA 31, San Luis, Torrevieja. Phone or email Terry for details. Phone: 647-189-135. Email: casatomsanluis@gmail.com

ChURCh SERVICES Torrevieja Christian Fellowship at Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas 68, Torrevieja 03183, welcome residents and visitors alike, to their friendly and lively 10.30 am. Service each Sunday morning. During the month of August they will not be holding the Wednesday night meeting at 6.00 pm. For further information and/or directions please telephone 966700391 or visit our website on www.tcf-spain.org." International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276. Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada.

AUTO ENGINEERING

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Prayer and Praise and Worship. Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.CommunityC hurch@gmail.com 968575417 or 966848806. Reg No:2009-SG/A The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597. The Rainbow Centre for spiritual awareness We meet in the function room at

Sacos bar el Limonar just off the CV 905 Rojales to Torrievieja road We have a divine service on Sundays at 11am and on Wednesdays we hold an evening of clairvoyance at 7.30 pm Also on Wednesdays there is an open circle at 5.30 for those who are interested in clairvoyance Healing is always available by certified healers after each meeting A warm welcome to friends old and new The mediums for the month of July 2014 are Wednesdays 2nd Debbie

CARPENTER

BLINDS BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Ref. DB6460L 85,000€ Restaurant in enviable location with no local competition and regular clientele. This profitable, established leasehold restaurant has a fully fitted modern kitchen,

CATERING

BARBER

CONSTRUCTION

ALARMS

CLEANERS

Friday, October 3, 2014 Blevins 9th Belinda & Jill 16th Trish and Shirley 23rd Sammy Fitzsimons 30th Paul & Jennet. Closed until August 31st then Belinda & Sandra. Sundays 6th Paul & jennet 13th Belinda Bradley 20th Ray Bailey 27th Trish. For further information call Trish on 966 844 795 or Email the rainbowcentrecostablana@gmail.com

the price of third party! Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at

CASER SEGUROS - for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral. Policies available in English and German. Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

GARDENER

GUITAR LESSONS

CARS FOR SALE

Guitar lessons for beginners and improvers. Provide an insight into most styles. From 10€ per hour. Call Peter on 966789612 or 629975378. Torrvieja

PROPERTY FOR RENT CAR BREAKERS

Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Santiago de la Ribera 2 bedroom townhouse close to beach and shops with communal pool €350 monthly short or long term lease Call 0044 7890996330 968570645 (162) Ref: 61, A lovely two bedroomed ground floor apartment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swimming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking distance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals. Call us on 96 692 3963 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart-

ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry system. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (184)

PROPERTY FOR SALE BPP-1808 230,000€ - 3 BEDROOM DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE in LOS MONTISINOS, ALICANTE, SPAIN TEL: 966443381 BPP1804 3 bedroom detached villa a spacious family Villa Torrevieja For Sale fully furnished 240,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2896 Old style spanish 4 bedroom detached Monte Zenia property reasonably priced 175,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2897 3 BEDROOM SEMI-DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE Aguas Nuevas 193,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2898 2 BEDROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE

Aguas Nuevas 125,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2901 2 Bedroom apartment Aguas Nuevas 73,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2906 Large 3 BEDROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE Aguas Nuevas 135,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP 2907 Exceptional value 2 BEDROOM APARTMENT FOR SALE €49,950 Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2908 Excellent location 3 BEDROOM DETACHED HOUSE FOR SALE Villamartin €269,000 Tel:

966 44 33 81 BPP2903 Huge Executive 3 BEDROOM APARTMENT FOR SALE Los Montesinos €165,000 Tel: 966 44 33 81 BPP2899 2 BEDROOM BUNGALOW FOR SALE Torrevieja 59,000€ Tel: 966 44 33 81 Del Este, Santa Pola - 4 bedroom Duplex within a Secure Small Private Community. It has an integral large garage with sink, washing machine, large storage area. Independent large bedroom and full bathroom. American style

UPHOLSTERY CLEANING

DRAINAGE PETS

Friday, October 3, 2014

kitchen, three bathrooms and cloakroom, front and back terraces, large solarium with bbq and shower, well maintained with a/c, ceiling fans. Communal Pool and third line from the beach. Sold with all white goods and furnished for 210,000 euros. 699613155 Ref: KP3100, €183,000. Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool. Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant. Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods. Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 communal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popular urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant. Quiet Location, Exceptional Views. Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005. Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge-Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg. Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House

with a difference. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons. Greenland Views and all local amenities close by. Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 2 Bedroom, 2 Bathroom, Unfurnished Mid Terraced Townhouse in GA. Recently decorated throughout means this property is a very clean black canvass. Has Air-Con & Security Grills and the use of a Communal Pool. Price recently reduced to 110.000e Ref.K12 Tel. 627711155 Reduced for a quick sale to 95.000 e 2 Bedroom, 1 bathroom, Top Floor Duplex in Gran Alacant. Very Modern Property with Many extras. Glazed in Porch, Roof Top Solarium, Wooden Flooring. Immaculate condition and ready to move in. Ref. K15 Tel. 627711155. Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed, 4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appliances & furniture also there is a utility room, open terrace, and private parking. The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, tennis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Gran Alacant villa located in

PLUMBERS

POOL TABLES

a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul-de-sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gardens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,private parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref. L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more. 125.000 Euros Ref No. K23. Tel. 627 711 155 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very central location, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155 Offers Invited on a mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner, Galleria, Solarium, Under build. Communal Pool and Gardens, and with

Exceptional Views of Alicante. Being Sold Fully Furnished including White Goods. Ref. K42 Tel. 627711155 (reasonable offers only) Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge-diner, independent kitchen, full roof-top solarium with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south-facing, very private villa, with woodland and Alicante views. Situated at the end of a small cul-de-sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge-diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and storage in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of outside parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in

SURVEYOR

QUIZZES €237,000 Tel 680333242 Experienced quizmaster/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

SITUATIONS VACANT

Tel:- 664 838 581 RADIO COSTA INTERNATIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential. Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainternational.com

SITUATIONS WANTED WANTED. English speaking mother's help aged 30-40, with driving licence, to help 7 year old boy with homework, and look after him. Work hours will be 4 hours a

STONE CRAFT

day, Monday to Friday. Own room with bathroom provided, in a house with a pool and garden, in Alcayna, Murcia. Pay will be 125 euros a week. If you have a young child this will not be a problem. Phone 607 43 39 43 or email: mancanpa@yahoo.es CARPET FITTER WANTED Experienced part time carpet fitter wanted for the expanding and successful Carpet Heaven in Los Montesinos. Must be hard Working, smart & friendly, with first class customer facing skills. A clean driving license, your own transport & tools are essential. Please send CV with references to carpetheaven@hotmail.es or call us on 966720782 for more information BUSY HAIR & BEAUTY SALON IN THE PLAYA FLAMENCA AREA REQUIRES A PART-TIME FULLY QUALIFED BEAUTICIAN TO JOIN THEIR FRIENDLY & PROFESSIONAL TEAM. TEL: 648111779 FOR DETAILS. Fully qualified confident friendly hair stylist with at least 5 years experience needed for immediate start in a well established salon in the Orihuela Costa area. Full time + part time work available. Please call Roxie on 635 071 879 Gardening, property maintenance, translations, cheap rates call David 722521654.

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

Call 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es REMOVALS

POOLS

the winter months. Ref.K24.

WIG SPECIALIST WANTED

SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer different Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

VAN HIRE

Friday, October 3, 2014

Greenside Gossip

IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

PHIL TAKES THE MICK

Well the Ryder Cup has been retained (won) by Europe, and was there any doubt? As far as the USA is concerned there are a few recriminations and the worst offender is Lefty aka Phil Mickleson. I guess only at the Ryder Cup would people take umbrage at the “humorous” retort of Lefty to the suggestion that the American team were not getting on as well as the Europeans. “Well” responded Lefty “not only are we able to play together but we also do not litigate against each other” In reference to the legal management dispute between Graeme McDowell and Rory McIlroy who are on opposing sides, albeit not

on a personal level. The rest of the Americans were picking their words carefully and had people revisiting the case of John Daly, the two time major winner who was never chosen to play in the Ryder Cup. Were the US hierarchy frightened of what he might say? No sooner had Europe walked off with the Ryder Cup than “Lefty” was at it again at the after-tournament media conference, knocking Tom Watson and hanging his hat on Paul Azinger being made captain next time out. “Zinger” was the boss in 2008 and was up against the unpopular European captain, Sir Nick Faldo, “Lefty” listed all the things Azinger had done right when the USA last

won, whilst Tom Watson sat and listened. It felt as awkward as the red pants the Americans wore! “There were two things that allow us to play our best. I think that is what Paul Azinger did:- one was he got everybody invested in the process; he got everybody invested in who they were going to play with, who the picks were going to be, who was going to be in their pod and when they were going to play, and they had a great leader for each pod”. He went on, “The other thing Paul did really well he had a great game plan, How we were going to go about playing together: golf ball; format; what we were going to do if so and so was playing well. We had a great game plan. We do the same things in the Presidents Cup and we do well, but then we strayed away from a winning formula in 2008 for the last

three Ryder Cups” His last comment was there was no one making a decision. Poor old Tom Watson. He responded by saying It was twelve players out there, not pods and the vicecaptains made the decisions of what the pairings were going to be. Mickleson said he was not going to rip the sitting captain in answering the question asked of him, though it did not reflect well on Watson. How much that reflected on his decision to leave Mickleson and Keegan Bradley out on Saturday was not clear, though it looked as though Mickleson was quite worked up. Next time take a leaf out of the Paul McGinley book and listen to all the assistants that have been there and won the tee shirt.

greens and the courtesy of taking your cap off (and sunglasses to make real eye contact) on the 18th green has gone out of the window to an extent. Unfortunately, some younger players have already and quite predictably adopted what they see as "style" from the pro circuit. Dress code is something which some are critical of but again, it sets a standard. If you can't afford a couple of cheap pairs of trousers and polo shirts, you probably can't afford to play golf. Snobby? No! You don't

the sport and it's the people who respect the standards who will be more likely to continue playing for many years rather than the casuals who may just play for a short time until they get fed up and move on. I think the answer may well be a combination of thoughts. Money does talk and you would hope that sponsors who pay millions to these guys to sell their brand would want a wholesome image, and therefore they should insist on a certain behaviour or dump the player. At the same time, the

need the latest Nike shirt at 60 euros or Jacobson trousers at 75 euros. It is perfectly possible to buy acceptable clothing at Carrefour or Primark for around 12 euros. If you think it's acceptable to turn up in track suit bottoms with your shirt (and belly) hanging out or combat shorts and a tee shirt, then in my opinion the course should say no (But as they say, money talks). There have been many calls to change the game's standards in order to grow it but frankly, some of the reduced standards will put many people off rather than encourage them to take up

tours need to crack down on poor behaviour/etiquette, and if they can police and penalise slow play (although not enough to my mind), then why not issue an immediate two shot penalty for slamming your club or something similar? I fear the tours will bottle it. I would want to see every player who is eligible and plans to play on the tour for the forthcoming year signing up to the brand and ethics contract, which spells out the penalties that WILL be imposed if they break the terms of the contract. No signature, no play. What do you think?

IS GOOD BEHAVIOUR ON THE WANE?

Is it just me? Or has anyone else noticed a deterioration in behaviour among golfers on the professional tours? In the last several tournaments (Ryder Cup excluded), I've seen golfers swiping at the bunker, hitting the golf bag, breaking a club, taking a chunk out of the fairway, etc. Tennis has a penalty for abusing equipment - perhaps golf needs it? Also, pro golfers have started spitting - surely this practice should be left to soccer players. Should the PGA Tours do something about it before the younger players become accustomed to lower standards? It also seems common to walk on opponents' lines on

KNOW YOUR RULES

QUESTION In the middle of the fairway is a tree. When hitting my second shot directly into the tree, the ball stays in the branches and becomes unplayable. The local rule is placing on the fairway one club length. Because my ball is in the tree and the tree in the fairway, I assume that I can use the local rule to place my ball for my third shot. Should I declare my ball unplayable and act according to the rule or should I have interpreted the local rule and placed my ball without a penalty? ANSWER All Local Rules for ‘Preferred Lies’ and/or ‘Winter Rules’ should follow the recommended wording suggested by the R&A in Appendix I, Part B, 4c, which starts, A ball lying on a closely mown area through the green may be lifted without penalty and cleaned. As the ball was obviously not lying on the fairway, you may not take relief under the ‘Preferred Lies’ Local Rule. Also, you must be able to find and identify your ball in the tree in order to proceed under options b) or c) of Rule 28 – Ball Unplayable. Otherwise your only option is to go back to the point where you played your last stroke from under penalty of stroke and distance.”

TITTER ON THE TEE A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I'd like to buy some cyanide". The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?" The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband." The pharmacist's eyes got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband, that's against the law! I'll lose my licence!” “They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!" The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife. The pharmacist looked at the picture and said, "You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

Friday, October 3, 2014

SPORTS FIXTURES

BULGARS BEATEN LUDOGORETS 1 REAL MADRID 2

Cristiano Ronaldo missed and scored a penalty before Real came from behind to beat Bulgarian side Ludogorets in the Champions League on Wednesday night. Marcelinho headed in after Real failed to clear Fabio Espinho's corner after eight minutes. Two minutes later Ronaldo had his penalty saved by Stoyanov but he did manage to convert another from the spot midway through the first half. Benzema sealed an unconvincing win when he headed in Marcelo's cross.

Saturday 4 October 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 17:30

Hull City v. Crystal Palace Leicester City v. Burnley Liverpool v. West Bromwich Albion Sunderland v. Stoke City Swansea City v. Newcastle United Aston Villa v. Manchester City

12:00 14:05 14:05 16:15

Manchester United v. Everton Chelsea v. Arsenal Tottenham Hotspur v. Southampton West Ham United v. Queens Park Rangers

Sunday 5 October

FIRST FALL LATE AGONY PSG 3 BARCELONA 2

ELCHE 0 CELTA VIGO 1

Barcelona suffered their first defeat of the season as Paris St-Germain moved top of Group F with a thrilling Champions League victory on Tuesday night. The visitors, who had not conceded all season before arriving at Parc des Princes, fell behind when former Chelsea defender David Luiz scored. Lionel Messi grabbed an equaliser but Marco Verratti nodded in PSG's second. Blaise Matuidi poked in a third and although Neymar reduced the deficit, Barcelona could not find an equaliser.

A last-gasp 90th minute goal from Nolito condemned Elche to their third straight defeat in a week last Friday night, as well as dropping them into the La Liga relegation area. Celta Vigo were good value for their win, whilst Elche’s best chance saw a goal-line clearance from Pablo Hernandez thwarting their counter-attacking move midway through the second half. The Ilicitanos are away to Almeria tomorrow night (Saturday October 4th).

Friday 3 October

19:45 Blackpool v. Cardiff City

Saturday 4 October 12:15 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00 15:00

Leeds United v. Sheffield Wednesday Blackburn Rovers v. Huddersfield Town Bolton Wanderers v. Bournemouth Brentford v. Reading Charlton Athletic v. Birmingham City Derby County v. Millwall Middlesbrough v. Fulham Norwich City v. Rotherham United Watford v. Brighton and Hove Albion Wolverhampton Wanderers v. Wigan Athletic

Sunday 5 October

15:00 Nottingham Forest v. Ipswich Town

Friday 3 October

19:45KKilmarnock v. Dundee United

Saturday 4 October

15:00 Dundee v. Aberdeen 15:00 Partick Thistle v. Motherwell 15:00 St. Johnstone v. St. Mirren

Sunday 5 October

12:45 Inverness Caledonian Thistle v. Ross County 13:00 Celtic v. Hamilton Academical

REALS RUN CONTINUES

VILLAREAL 0 REAL MADRID 2

SIX OF THE BEST BARCELONA 6 GRANADA 0

First half goals from Luka Modric and Cristiano Ronaldo saw Real Madrid overcome a potentially

the half-hour mark with a trademark shot from outLionel Messi scored his side the area and Ronaldo doubled the lead before the 400th career goal and Neymar hit a hat-trick as Barcelona got back to winning ways in style, routing

strike from Neymar stretched Barca's lead at the break. Two Messi strikes sandwiched Neymar's third in the sec-

tricky trip to Villarreal and march on to their third straight win last Saturday. The Croatia midfielder broke the deadlock after

break. They are fifth in the table, four points behind leaders Barcelona, and entertain Athletic Bilbao this Sunday night.

Granada last Saturday at the Nou Camp. A deflected goal by Neymar set the Catalans on their way to victory before a header by Ivan Rakitic and another

ond half as the South American duo completed the rout. Barcelona top the table and are away to Rayo Vallecano this Saturday afternoon(October 4th).

Friday 3 October

20:00 Getafe v. Cordoba

Saturday 4 October 15:00 17:00 19:00 21:00 21:00

Valencia CF v. Atletico de Madrid Rayo Vallecano v. Barcelona Eibar v. Levante Almeria v. Elche Malaga v. Granada CF

Sunday 5 October 11:00 16:00 TBC 20:00

Sevilla v. Deportivo de La Coruña Celta de Vigo v. Villarreal Espanyol v. Real Sociedad Real Madrid v. Athletic Club

Friday 3 October 19:45 Bath v. Saracens

Saturday 4 October

15:00 Harlequins v. London Welsh 15:15 Gloucester v. Leicester 15:00 London Irish v. Northampton

Sunday 5 October 15:00 Newcastle v. Exeter 14:00 Sale v. Wasps

BETHS BIRTHDAY BONUS

Club Natacion Torrevieja’s swimmers had a great start to the new season at the “1st Traversia a Nado Marina d’Or”, north of Valencia City. Vicki Connolly and her daughter Zoe raced alongside Beth Alterbas in the 4km swim to celebrate Beth’s 70th birthday, with Zoe excelling herself in tough conditions as the youngest swimmer in the event by getting 25th place overall and 10th in the under 25yrs (Zoe is only 13). Meanwhile, Beth came first in the over-50 yrs section and Vicki won the 40-49 yrs age group. To round off a fine day, the award presentations later found the whole audience joining in to sing “Happy Birthday” to Beth in both Spanish and English!

Friday, October 3, 2014

AND THE ALSO-RANS ARE… Who’s Big - But Struggling Early Doors?

O, Danny Boy – Welbeck’s hat trick for Arsenal in the Champions League on Wednesday night against a woeful Galatasaray side ensured Arsene Wenger could happily celebrate his 18 years as the Gunners boss - but in the league, Arsenal are unconvincing. Last Saturday the Ox factor spared the Gunners’ blushes in a 1 -1 key derby draw against detested rivals Tottenham. What is it with the precious Arsenal midfield? It looked like half the Emirates superstars couldn’t stand the heat and wanted out of the kitchen. First Mikerabel (sic) Arteta limped off after only10 minutes, soon followed by jinxed-Jack Wilshere, acting like a kid who’s wet his pants, arm straight up for the physio before he’s even hit the deck. Next to go was Airhead Ramsey, walking straight off at the slightest sign of trouble. Even Wenger was surprised, he thought the Welshman rested and fit after missing the previous midweek game. Ironically of course, the French Maître D’ has bought so many midfielders - and the occasional striker - that there’s a double bench full of ‘em: Cazorla, Flamini, Sanchez, Oxlade-Chamberlain, Rosicky, Podolski, Monreal, Senogo. Still doesn’t get the Gunners anywhere though… Already on sick parade there’s Mathieu Debuchy, Olivier Giroud, Theo Walcott, Abou Diaby, Serge Gnabry – just what is going on at the Emirates? Well, Spurs were happier with the derby result, where the sleek, sweet fleet of Lamella, Eriksson and Chadli look the part - but can’t press everywhere like Pochettino’s Saints used to. As for indifferent Adebayor, well…he’s just not at the races these days. Spurs need a good, regular striker, and Soldado‘s obviously not the answer. Where’s that goalscoring Harry Kane, apparently he’s fit but not in favour. Fortunately at the back Hugo Lloris is playing brilliantly, where would Spurs be without him? Looks like a work-in-progress for Tottenham this season; could they just check

Chelsea this Super Sunday? Nah… ‘Not good enough’ – ‘No enthusiasm’ – ‘They wanted it more’ – ‘Only one effort on goal’ - were comments made about, and by Liverpool themselves after the Reds were competing in the Champions League midweek, this being the first time in five years after finishing as Premier League runners-up to Manchester City last season. Wednesday’s average-looking opponents Basel joyfully and deservedly won 1 – 0 – and Liverpool have to play Real Madrid twice… Oh, dear, Brendan Rodgers looks like a man short on ideas, and down on his luck - one point from the last three l e a g u e games is bad at this e a r l y stage. Last s e a s o n ’s tumult u o u s events saw a n e w , exciting Liverpool c o m e through to only just lose the title, but now it seems almost everyone’s doing it better. The glaring difference, it has to be said is no Suarez now. The Uruguayan’s very presence stimulated his team, and shook up the opposition, always leaving space and time for the (absent, injury-prone) Sturridge, Sterling, Henderson et al. His replacement, Mario Balotelli is a wysiwyg, an

OH DANI BOY CD TORREVIEJA 0

Ex- Torry left back Dani Meseguer returned to the club to flight a free kick into the box that was perfectly executed by Urzaiz in the 76th minute. Gines added a second with two minutes left as Torry rued a series of missed chances in front of a bumper crowd. Would the result have been

ORIHUELA CF 2 different if muscular striker Steve Ekedi had played? After four home games he is yet to play a league game at the Vicente Garcia. He missed the opener through delayed paperwork and the next two due to suspensions. This one he sat out after a dispute with the manager, who chastened him by excluding him from selection! Steve returned to full training on Monday and hopefully the point has been made as the team prepare for a 5.00pm start in Levante on Saturday. Adrian, who has missed all the league games with an injury picked up in pre-season looks fully fit and is likely to make the starting eleven. But it is goals that are the main worry with Torry netting only six in seven games. There is no pressure on the manager at present, whose style of play is creative and entertaining. However, if points don't start appearing rapidly on the board, all that might change.

individual one-off performer struggling to re-invent himself in Liverpool’s required eyes as a team player, which, for all his personal problems Suarez undoubtedly was. Balotelli’s one goal in seven matches is nowhere near good enough, but looking positively Adam Lallana is fit and playing at last: could Rodgers build the new team around him? The ex-Saints captain was the main man at St Mary’s, and might be the current missing link at Anfield. Defender Mamadou Sakho apologised after leaving Anfield early during Saturday's Merseyside derby against Everton. Liverpool manager Brendan Rodgers said Sakho had not made the trip to Switzerland as he was side-lined for two to three weeks after getting injured in a training session. Yeah, right… West Brom are coming to Anfield Saturday, on the back of a 4 – 0 win over Burnley. Hmm… Everton have also been in lacklustre form lately, and might have lost Gareth Barry very early against Liverpool, booked for taking out Lallana inside the first 45 seconds, and then very lucky when Raheem Sterling's shot hit his hand, this in a week where there had already been 31 spot-kicks at Anfield in the Reds' Capital One Cup win over Middlesbrough. Everton's leaky back-line, which had conceded 13 goals in the first five league games of the season, largely succeeded in keeping the Liverpool attack at arms' length. Blues captain Phil Jagielka had the last word in dramatic fashion, thundering home the equaliser from well outside the area, his 10th goal in Everton colours and by far the most memorable one. Man United at Old Trafford this Super Sunday – ooh! Swansea, Bach? Bin found out or temporary setback? After Chelsea putting the Swans in their place, last Saturday’s goalless draw against stillstruggling Sunderland made Garry Monk’s men look unconvincing, raising questions about the Welsh whizz-kids ability to last the course, now they are up there with the Big Boys. Saturday’s visit from nervy Newcastle may smooth the Swans ruffled feathers, the Geordie word being owner Mike Ashley is understandingly unhappy that the Magpies are bottom. Arrivederci, Alan? Ojala…

EDU DOES IT CD MONTESINOS 1

CD MURADA 0

Montesinos won their opening home fixture to make it two of out of two for the season, and got their first ever win over bogey side Murada into the bargain. Monte dominated the first half but a variety of chances went abegging include a 35 yard screamer from Marcos which hit the crossbar. The visitors started the second half in a more positive vein, but substitutions for Monte started to turn the tide, mostly notably Orouker coming on for Marcos. The home side took a grip of the match and were rewarded in the 70th minute when Orouker won the ball brilliantly spun & passed to M&A who whipped in a cross for a perfectly placed header into the net by Edu much to the delight of the home fans. Murada did press for an equaliser, but Lopez produced two good stops to maintain their lead and in the dying seconds Murada’s keeper was beaten on the half way line by Carlos who shot wide rather than running it into the net. Monte are at home again this weekend, but play tomorrow (Saturday) due to the local fiestas, as they entertain Playas De Orihuela with a 5.00pm kick off

Friday, October 3, 2014

S A I N T S BE PR A I S ED! The great Pele has returned to Graze St Mary’s

Quiz question: - What have Lallana, Lambert, Lovren, Shaw, Pochettino and the Titanic got in common? They should all never have left Southampton! What about Graziano Pelle’s unbelievable winner on Saturday against Quite Possibly Relegated, ironically only just shading Charlie Austin’s superb equaliser only moments before? The Saints’ high-flying Dutchman boss (no, not that one, see below) Ronald Koeman bought the cool-but-hot Italian from Feyenoord where the two worked together previously: smooth move. Pelle’s amazing goal tally of 56 in his last 63 games (now including Southampton) is something else, but apparently the scintillating scissor-kick strike was no surprise, Grazi does it every week in training - and his winner kept scintillating Southampton second. To me it was shades of that great Saints hero Matt Le Tissier, volleying was his speciality. Surely Ron’s Revelations can’t keep this up and worry the likes of Chelsea and Man City? Well… guess where Southampton are going on Super Sunday? Only White Hot lane to play Spurs – and Pochettino… Harry’s Hoops are firmly in the Dreaded Drop Department, along with nervy Newcastle and Burnley, the latter were wacked 4 – 0 by West Brom on Monday. Can anyone stop the Chelsea bandwagon? After safely putting Villa away, on Tuesday Jose Mourinho returned to his student home in Lisbon. His new Bridge Blues put Sporting in their place in the Champions League, the 1 – 0 win should/could have been four or five, Chelsea are now virtually though to the knock-out stages. Match of the Day is Chelsea v Arsenal at the Bridge on Super Sunday, don’t miss it…

John McGregor reports

Will Man City even survive the group stages of the Champions League? Not if the stuttering performance in midweek is anything to go by, a solitary Aguero penalty was all the Blues managed against a lively Roma side, where Old King Cole (Ashley) still looked good. A record-breaking 38 year-old Totti efficiently equalised in the 1- 1 draw, a result which leaves City a lot to do. Stop press: after this week’s successes, Frank Lampard is now only 155 goals away from becoming Man City's all-time top goalscorer, but Lamp’s loan looks like it’ll need extending. Bruised-of-Birmingham, aka Aston Villa entertain City on Saturday, have the Grey Beards sorted the Villains out yet? LATEST LIFE WITH LOUIS: LVG’s office, Monday morning with Wayne Rooney: LVG (red faced, furious): Whine, Way? WR: Eh, boss? LVG: I mean – why Wayne? WR: Why what, boss? I scored a belter and we won LVG: I know zat! Do you think I am stupid? I mean why did you get sent off? WR: The ref didn’t like my tackling for the team, boss LVG: Tackling? You kicked Downing in his – ‘Max Walls’, is it? WR: Cobblers, boss. Hey, sorry, no offence, Louis wack…. Me tackle was just a bit late, see LVG: Late? You were nearly in time for next week! Ha, zat is my joke - now you can’t play against Everton – and West Birmingham and afterwards ze toptables, Chelsea. You are ze capitan, you should make an example of yourself! Are you still going to ze anger management classes zat Saint Axel made you to go to? WR: You mean Sir Alex, boss. Nah, useless… They said I had to count to ten, but I have trouble past four. I’ve got dislezbia, see LVG: Too many curries, no wonder you lose your temper. Well, you won’t be capitan for three weeks,

my good Dutch boy Robin will maybe do better – and not get sent off. Hey, zat fat inglisman Ray Hudson was watching, you know. WR: You mean Roy Hodgson, boss. S’OK, I’m his England captain as well. LVG: Vell, don’t get sent off playing for Ingerland! Anyway, your team is ‘crack’, is it? We Dutch came third in the World Cup you know! WR: We’re ‘crap’ you mean, boss. Yeah, you’re right… Serious United questions. One: - How can you spend over £150m by the sixth game of the new season – but only have one fit centre back? The crisis meant on Saturday, United played 19-year-old Paddy McNair in central defence with £27m summer signing Luke Shaw at left-back, with both making their club debuts. Question 2:-Why is it acceptable for your star striker to be sent off for wildly kicking an opponent, straight red card? Wouldn’t be because he scored the first in an edgy 2 – 1 win, would it, hanging desperately onto three priceless points to keep you in a job. What about the fact he can’t now play against Everton, West Brom and Chelsea? A captain’s example of how not-to-do-it? Question 3:-If you fired the last bloke for his unacceptable league performance, but he was doing better than your new one, how long has the new one got? Unlucky West Ham were left to rue being on the wrong end of a close offside call when Nolan's lastgasp effort was disallowed. The relief was enormous around Old Trafford at the final whistle. Sunday’s visit by not-quite-right-yet Everton will be a huge test for everyone at Old Trafford - fingernails ready lads? Capital crunch come Saturday, West Ham v Quaintly Poor Results.