The Courier Edition 262

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Friday 30th October Friday 6th November 2015 Friday 11th March 2016

IN THE AIR TONIGHT

ALEX TRELINSKI

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massive marijuana growing operation in the San Miguel de Salinas area has been shutdown after a resident complained to the police about the stench being created by the drug.

The National Police got tipped off by an anonymous e-mail and then they swooped on two adjoining houses in the municipality.

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Four people (two men and two women), of British and Icelandic nationality, were detained, and besides drugs offences, they’ve also been charged with stealing over 20 thousand euros of electricity.

Two adjoining houses in San Miguel hid the fact that some twelve hundred plants were being cultivated

there, but the gang were rumbled as their air extraction system didn’t deliver what was required for one of their neighbours. The National Police said the massive marijuana farm was stacked with equipment and that the stolen power for all the heating and lighting amounted to 22 thousand euros.

SHOPPING AROUND

ork on a major new shopping centre in the San Pedro del Pinatar area will start in the next week, based at Los Saez, just off the N-332 road, and next to the existing Dos Mares shopping centre.

It’s planned that the centre, which will create 150 jobs, will be completed by November in time for the Christmas rush, and will feature an AKI home improvement centre; a supermarket from the Valencian-based Vidal chain; and a Burger King restaurant. The development will be built over 23 thousand square metres, and will also feature a furniture shop and shoe outlet as

well as a petrol station.

Developer Activ Group’s boss, Mathias Buttkus, said that he did not see the adjoining Dos Mares centre as a rival to the new devel-

opment but more as a complementary offering. “Dos Mares”, said Buttkus, “has no DIY superstore or shoe outlet, and what we are doing will boost business for

the area”. The marketing plan for Los Saez sees it taking customers from across San Pedro, San Javier, Pilar de la Horadada and Los Alcázares.

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News

Friday 11th March 2016

Short Fuse Your Bigger, Bolder, Brighter Courier Telephone 966 921 003

A knifeman who threatened several people in the Plaza de la Glorieta area of Santa Pola and who then hid in a bar, was arrested last Friday afternoon by the

local police. The 54-yearold started hurling verbal abuse and produced a knife from a bag, after apparently he couldn't buy any paper tissues from a street vendor.

King Takes A Rest

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Valencia City launched a series of new pedestrian crossing lights to coincide with International Women's Day on Tuesday with the city council unveiling 20 lights which feature 'little green women' instead of 'little green men'. The figures on the red and green lights

instructing pedestrians when it is safe to cross and when it is not wear, skirts to show they are female. Mayor Joan Ribó says the move has not cost any extra, and will be extended across the city each time a pedestrian crossing light breaks down and needs to be repaired.

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A 24-year-old British lorry driver was arrested in Catral after the National Police found 43 kilos of marijuana in his vehicle which was destined for the United Kingdom. Authorities had been working on trying to smash a racket which involved smuggling drugs in lorries from Lorca in Murcia over to Britain, and were stopping and searching heavy goods vehicles in the Lorca area.

One of the lorries that was

stopped in Lorca had British plates on it, but though the police let it go on its journey, they thought there was something fishy going on, and followed it, whilst UK authorities confirmed that the truck was not registered with them. Once the news was flashed to them, the National Police halted the lorry in Catral, and discovered 54 vacuum wrapped packs of marijuana, as well as 100 grams of hashish, hidden in a double roof,

King Felipe has decided not to open a new round of one-to-one talks with Spanish political party leaders to give them more time to reach a coalition deal, although so far they are unwilling to bridge their divisions as a potential new election looms.

After Socialist leader Pedro Sanchez failed to win enough support last Friday, the parties have until May 2nd to reach a parliamentary majority and form a government or the lower house will be dissolved and a new election will be called.

Sanchez won the support of only 131 members of the 350-strong parliament last week, with the opposition of acting Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy's Partido conservative Popular (PP), anti-austerity Podemos and five smaller parties scuppering his pact with newcomer Ciudadanos.

Although businesses and investors have so far

remained calm about the deadlock, a new election would raise the risk that Spain's uneven economic be might recovery impaired by lost months of political leadership.

The king's office said in a statement he would postpone formal talks with leaders, which he has held twice since a December election when Spaniards deserted the two traditional parties to vote for newcomers.

But with the clock ticking there are few signs that parties are willing to move from their entrenched positions in the negotiations that have often boiled over into vitriolic attacks.

Rajoy, in Brussels for EU talks on refugees on Monday, said a new election would be "ridiculous," that repeated and Sanchez should join the PP in a coalition of centre left and centre right, which the Socialist leader has rejected.

"I will call Mr Sanchez and if, as has been the case so far, he does not want to see me, evidently I will not be able to do anything else," he told reporters on arriving.

Sanchez hopes to persuade Podemos to join his "government of change" and the upstart party's leader, Pablo Iglesias, who is holding out for an alliance solely between leftist parties, said on Monday he would reopen talks between the two.

But Iglesias has said an agreement with Sanchez is only possible if he abanbusiness-friendly dons Ciudadanos, something strongly opposed by many Socialist politicians.

In a survey by pollster Metroscopia published on Sunday in the newspaper El Pais, Ciudadanos' leader Albert Rivera and Sanchez were seen as the two leaders who had come out best from the investiture debate, with Iglesias as the worst.

Sporty San Pedro 80 improvements have been carried out over recent months to San Pedro del Pinatar's Polideportivo sports complex, which has been visited by San Pedro's mayor, Visitación Martínez. A bigger children's play area and improved access are some of the recent enhancements, with new beach volleyball and basketball courts coming soon.

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Friday 11th March 2016

Max Rescued

Coked Out China expressed alarm on Thursday about an agreement in which the Philippines will lease five aircraft from Japan to help patrol the disputed South China Sea.

A search is underway for the owners of a British dog found tied to a gatepost early last Saturday morning in the Los Montesinos area. The report in the Manchester Evening News says that Max, believed to be a Labrador cross breed, has been handed over to the animal rescue charity Pets in Spain who had him examined by a vet.

Max was micro-chipped and staff at the charity have attempted to obtain details of the owners from the PetLog company that

it’s registered with. Staff at the microchipping firm have revealed that the animal was last registered in the Manchester area and have confirmed its name. However they have not disclosed further details to the charity, but are now trying to contact the owners directly.

Mark Lewis, 64, from Wigan has worked in animal rescue for 20 years, and helped set up the Pets in Spain charity which helps rescue and re-home animals of all types.

He told the M.E.N: “It was found by a friend of ours who’s involved with the charity We’ve taken him to the vets and he’s quite an old dog and in a bit of a bad way. We’ve done some checks and appears he was last registered in Manchester.”

“Dogs being abandoned in Spain are becoming more and more common. And often the details with micro-chip company are not updated.

We’re just asking anyone who recognises him to get in touch with us.”

21 people have been arrested by the National Police in Spain, including a Columbian national based in Torrevieja who was described as the ringleader, for being part of an operation that shipped 430 kilos of cocaine from Ecuador via Spain to Jeddah in Saudi Arabia in boxes of frozen chicken and paint spray cans. The Torrevieja-based detainee is said to have co-ordinated the shipments.

It’s one of the largest ever cocaine and drugs busts in the Middle East, with the original plan being for the drugs to be distributed across Alicante Province and around Spain. Potential buyers in Saudi and elsewhere would book their cocaine supplies via the internet, after “mules” had brought the drugs over from Ecuador to Spain. An anonymous tip-off led to valuable information that the National Police acted on.

Pretty Boy

the appearance of local roundabouts. Better park and garden cleaning was promised in addition to better sewer maintenance as well as the removal of asbestos roofing from local car parks. Álvarez and Boné both stressed their agreement on matters to improve the area.

About 13,000 migrants are now stranded at the Macedonia-Greece border – wishing to travel to Europe, to reach Germany and other northern European states.

A shooting at a backyard barbecue in the northeastern US state of Pennsylvania left five people dead.

A Crevillente shoe store owner got a surprise customer when an exotic parrot flew into his shop. One of his employees then looked after it before the Seprona division of the Guardia Civil came to take it away to the safe keeping of the Noah's Ark Wildlife Centre in Alicante.

The "Yaco" or "Grey Partido Popular administration and the centrist Ciudadanos party. Álvarez listed some of the priorities and recent achievements in regard to recent concerns over cleaning and infrastructure matters on the Orihuela Costa, which included sprucing up kerbs and plans to improve

A deal between Turkey and the European Union to readmit migrants does not apply to refugees already on Greek islands.

Five Afghans, including baby, drown trying to reach Greece from Turkey.

Best Buddies

Orihuela coastal councillor, Sofía Álvarez, had a new watchful eye over her at her latest news conference in the shape of Ciudadanos councillor, Luisa Boné, who is "assisting" her in Orihuela Costa matters, following a pact that was signed a fortnight ago between the minority

Stephen Hawking has joined more than 150 top scientists in calling for Britain to stay in the European Union, saying that leaving would be "a disaster for UK science.

Parrot" fluttered into the store in the Camí de Catral area of Crevillente and after a little bit of pecking on the hand of the helpful employee, it calmed itself down. It was described as being in "very good" condition, and a numbered disc on its right leg should hopefully get it reunited with its owner.

Teen Anger An 18-year-old British youth is suspected of committing arson at his parent’s home in Los Nietos overlooking the Mar Menor.

His parents told the Guardia Civil that their son had been caught stealing from their business last

month and that harsh words were exchanged, with the teen threatening to kill them and to burn down their house.

A day later, a fire broke out at the home, and the Guardia subsequently arrested the teenager.

Six Bangladeshi migrants caught entering Australian waters by the country's border patrol have been sent back to Indonesia on a fishing boat.

Massive underwater limestone towers have been found in line with Australia's famous '12 Apostle' ocean rock formations.

Iran fired two more longrange ballistic missiles as it continued military tests in defiance of US sanctions.

Brazilian state prosecutors filed money laundering charges against expresident Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva.

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Friday 11th March 2016

Close Call An ambulance driver had to be taken to the Vega Baja Hospital as a patient last week when a burst tyre made him lose control of his vehicle on the CV-91 in Almoradi close to the Las Maromas industrial estate. He remained conscious throughout the incident which saw the vehicle go into an embankment, and no serious injuries were sustained by his passengers.

Delay Claim

The Orihuela Costabased political party, Claro, says it took 20 minutes for an ambulance to arrive to help a youngster who was injured in a collision with a car on the Orihuela Costa last Friday night. The accident happened at around 10.00 pm on Calle Realistas on the La Ciñuelica urbanisation and though the local police were promptly at the scene, Claro claimed that the delay in the ambulance arrival was yet another example of why the longdelayed and incompleted Emergency Centre at La Zenia was urgently needed.

Out Of Fashion

20 thousand second-hand uniforms on their way to jihadist groups including Islamic State in Iraq and Syria have been seized by the National Police in Spain.

The uniforms were found in three containers seized in the ports of Valencia and Algeciras last month after the police discovered a network sending weapons and military equipment to jihadist groups under the guise of humanitarian aid.

Seven people were detained as part of an investigation opened in 2014 regarding logistical and financial support being pro-

vided to Daesh and AlNusra Front groups in Syria and Iraq. The containers were all marked with the designation "second-hand clothing" in order not to raise suspicion during customs inspections, according to the police.

"With nearly 20 thousand uniforms and military accessories seized, they would have been able to equip an entire army, which would be perfectly prepared to enter combat in any of the centres of conflict where terrorist jihadist organisations operate in the world," police explained.

All Over

Tourist Topping

Overall winter tourism levels in the Costa Blanca have reached figures not seen since 2001 according to hotel occupation rates which put Benidorm at an impressive 80 percent, and 60 percent for the rest of the region. Antonio Mayor of the Costa Blanca Hoteliers Association (Hosbec) says this is down to a combination of good weather with the mildest winter seen in well over a generation, as well as tourists shunning potential trouble spots in Tunisia,

Turkey, and the Middle East.

Specific figures for February showed Costa Blanca hotel occupancy up by six point one percent on the same month last year, with Hosbec saying that they were the best returns for that month since 2009, with last month’s occupancy rate standing at 72 percent. Domestic Spanish visitors accounted for 56 percent of the rooms booked, followed by 16 percent from the United Kingdom

Big Bullies

High Polluting

Bulldozers are set to pull down an illegal house built in Pilar de la Horadada some 15 years after the first complaint was made over it. Valencia's Supreme Court confirmed the demoSpain has the unwelcome lead in a survey that says that pollution levels in the country rose more than in any other European country last year. CO2 levels went up by four percent during 2015 in Spain with a 23 hike in the use of electricity as the cause, says the Observatory of Sustainability. Emissions from vehicles also grew by over three percent last year.

Shaken Baby A man in his early thirties has been arrested on suspicion of abusing his two month old baby by vigoursly shaking his child.

The National Police say that the baby is in Alicante General Hospital and may have potential brain injuries with his father admitting to having lost his temper when he could not calm down his crying child, whose physical injuries are not serious.

lition order on the home that was constructed in 2001 on 130 square metres of land in the Canada de Práez area, with no licenses in place for the works carried out.

Fatal Mistake

The Guardia Civil have arrested four minors allegedly involved in the fatal hit-and-run of a police officer in the north-eastern province of Huesca.

Guardia officer Jose Antonio Perez stopped the suspects' vehicle to carry out an alcohol test and leant into the car last Friday night, The 17-year-old driver accelerated, dragging the officer 460 metres. The vehicle then hit a guardrail and crashed into an oncoming car, flinging the 54-year-old Perez onto the road where he died.

The Guardia said the

youths then fled, abandoning Perez and two people injured in the other car.

Officers arrested two 17year-olds - the alleged driver tested positive for drugs - and two 14-year-olds last Saturday before delivering the suspects to juvenile court officials in the city of Barbastro.

Interior Minister Jorge Fernandez Diaz posthumously awarded Spain's Order of Merit to Perez at a ceremony in Barbastro's cathedral on Sunday, which was followed by a funeral mass attended by highranking Guardia officials.

January’s increased national and local tourist figures, as previously reported in The Courier, have also brought more money into the Spanish economy, with official figures showing, not too surprisingly, a three point six percent increase in tourist spending compared to January 2015. Three point seven billion euros was pumped into the country by visitors, with Brits spending 618 million euros, up by over seven percent on a year earlier.

Around a third of children in Spanish schools

are bullied according to figures produced by Save

The Children. The charity interviewed a large sample of almost 22 thousand youngsters, with the survey suggesting that 32 percent of them actually admitted in questioning that they bullied their peers at school.

Six out of ten children said they had been on the receiving end of many verbal insults, with over a fifth being physically attacked. Cyber bullying was also playing a part with six percent of youngsters saying that their social media accounts had been hacked or interfered with.

Finder’s Illegal Keep

A man from Northern Spain been arrested for selling jewellery he found with a metal detector on his local beach in the Santander area. The 58year-old found numerous items of gold and silver on Laredo beach and made at least 18 sales over the course of two years in jewellery shops in the Cantabria regional capital.

He is said to have made around €3,500 from doing so.

The items included engraved jewellery such as wedding and engagement rings, and bracelets and necklaces with dates of birth, some with names – none of which bore any relation to the seller. His arrest clears up any possible doubt other members

of the public may have about the 'finders, keepers' idea – items found should always be handed in to the police, where they will remain in the lost property department for two years. If, after this time has passed, they have not been reclaimed, the original finder has the right to retrieve it and keep or sell it as required.

News

Friday 11th March 2016

Bigger And Better Supermarket chain Mercadona recorded a net profit of 611 million euros in 2015, an increase of 12 per cent on the previous year.

President Juan Roig also revealed that sales increased by 670 million euros to just over 20 billion euros, a rise of three per cent. The retailer's online sales grew by eight per cent to 169 million euros, and Roig announced that the company intends to focus on this aspect of the business by building its second data processing centre in Le贸n and by redesigning its website.

Thorughout 2015, Mercadona invested over 651 million euros in the opening of 60 new supermarkets and in the refur-

bishment of another 30.

This brings its total number of stores to 1,574. Looking at 2016, the company aims to increase both profits and sales by 2 per cent. In service of this goal, Roig announced that another 650 million euros will be

Bookwormed

A drunk driver destroyed a book kiosk on Torrevieja's Calle Ram贸n y Cajal on the Paseo de Juan Aparicio, with hundreds of volumes being scattered in the impact of the crash. The outlet sells books during the holiday and summer seasons, and was hit by

the out of control vehicle early on the morning of March 3rd. The Guardia Civil detained the male driver for drink-driving and he was clocked at being three times the blood-alcohol limit. He was also charged with resisting arrest.

Mixed Message Spanish property sales fell by two point nine percent in January, compared to the same month in 2015, meaning the end of 16 straight months of increases. The figures from the National Statistics Institute say that

over 32 thousand transactions were carried out in the first month of 2016, with a thirty percent fall in new building deals being the cause of the overall fall, as older property sales saw an annual rise.

Knocked Down

A Catral eyesore in the Barrio de La Cruz area of the town: - namely a crane that has been there for a decade on an uncompleted development, has been finally removed.

The

deserted structure had been left unused since 2007 with concerns raised by local residents over the safety of the rusting crane, which was dismantled last week.

invested in the company's operations which will go towards the opening of 60 more stores, the refurbishment of another 35 outlets, and the continuing construction of its two logistics centres in Barcelona and Vitoria-Gasteiz.

Taking The Proverbial

Two bogus electricity men have been arrested in Torrevieja after they offered a power upgrade for an Elche resident's swimming pool for the cool sum of six thousand euros. The villa owner in Matola thought something was up when he was given the inflated quote, and he rang the police.

The 32 and 45-year old men, of Argentinean nationality, were detained separately in Torrevieja by the National Police, after inquiries revealed that they had nothing to do with Iberdrola or any other official power supplier.

Zika Latest Spain has this week reported a total of 38 diagnosed cases of Zika virus, including five pregnant women, according to the Ministry of Health. Of the total number of cases, all of them imported, there has been one case each in the Murcia and Valencia regions.

All diagnosed cases in Spain are people who travelled to areas affected by the disease, notably in South America. Spain approved last month a monitoring protocol following the Zika virus outbreak and a plan to respond to other diseases transmitted by the Aedes aegypti mosquito, which vector of dengue and chikungunya.

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It’s A Date Torrevieja’s May Fair will be held from Wednesday May 4th to Sunday May 8th and will be organised by la Casa de Andalucía, ending a 25-year-old partnership between Torrevieja council and the Asociación Amigos de la Feria de Mayo, as reported in last week’s Courier. The dates were confirmed this week with the council making the change for financial reasons, whilst the previous organisers claim that the authority dragged its heels on meeting with them to discuss the situation.

Burning Beds

A five-storey Santa Pola apartment block had to be evacuated as a precaution on Friday night, when a fire broke out in a bedroom of a flat on the top floor. The incident happened on Calle San José, opposite the Palmeral auditorium, and the blaze was put out by two fire fighting teams, with the flat being empty at the time of the incident.

Pups Left A man who abandoned six mastiff puppies last summer in the San Javier and San Pedro del Pinatar areas has been fined a total of 154 euros which included the expense of treating them at a local vet. A San Javier judge heard that a puppy was abandoned at the San Pedro dog park in June last year, and then two more the following day at the same location. Another puppy was discovered in San Pedro tied to a palm tree, and in need of food and water, and the remaining two were found in San Javier.

Safety Call

Sharp Exit

Authorities are trying to find out what happened to the driver of a car that crashed off the AP-7 by exit 740 close to the village of

Heredades on Saturday. The vehicle was found upside down with signs of blood, but no sign whatsoever of the motorist.

Rafal has a new health centre building which officially opened for business on Wednesday.

The centre, costing over half a million euros, has been totally funded by the Valencian Government,

and is based on Calle Antonio Mora Hernández, at the junction with Calle La Despierta. The new facilities will mean an extended range of consultations as well as longer opening hours.

Good Health

Mother’s Ruin

A youngster had enough of his drink-driving mother, and shopped her to the authorities for being intoxicated whilst being behind the wheel. The Mossos d'Esquadra said that the 11-year-old boy pretended he needed to go to the toilet at a service station in Vidreres in Girona province. Once there, he asked a staff member for help because his mother was drunk at the wheel.

The boy lives in a children's

home along with his 10year-old brother, and their mother had picked them up as part of a limited access agreement.

In response to the boy's insistence that his mother was incapable of driving, a petrol station employee called the police, who breathalysed her and found her to be over the limit – which was clear even beforehand, they said, since she was visibly drunk. The 46-year-old

Spanish woman was arrested and her sons taken back to the children's home.

Catalunya social services are investigating what happened and the mother's situation in order to decide whether she will be allowed future access visits. She had lost custody of the children for reasons which have not been disclosed, but has been allowed to have them home for the weekend on occasions.

Segura Success

More Fakery Authorities have raided a second warehouse unit on a Crevillente industrial estate and uncovered another haul of fake goods.

The Courier last week reported that the National Police swooped on a unit and found 500 headphones

with bogus Apple labels on them, and this time thirteen hundred counterfeit clothes branded under the Desigual label were found, said to be worth around 110 thousand euros. Two people have been charged with copyright crimes.

Video Nasty A Cartagena resident was among four Spaniards arrested for distributing child pornography via Whatsapp and other inter-

net social networking sites.

They swapped obscene child abuse images with 52 other people internationally.

Drugs Duo Algorfa's mayor, Manuel Ros, has called for road safety improvements to some of the major routes in the area, after a meeting with the head of Alicante Province's public works department. Ros says that speeding is a major concern as traffic enters and exits the town, notably on the N-935 Benejúzar-Benijófar road, and the N-920 between Los Montesinos and Almoradí.

He added that residents have been concerned for many years and nothing has been done, with the authority proposing speed bumps and rumble strips as part of a package of measures.

News

Friday 11th March 2016

Improvements to the River Segura have been recognised internationally with the European Riverprize 2015 going to the Confederación Hidrográfica del Segura (CHS). for all the co-ordinated restoration work on the Segura basin.

The CHS has acted as the agency appointed by the national government to work with the local councils in making the necessary changes, with the Riverprize winners beating off the other two finalists, namely

England's River Trent, and closer to home, the Aragón river in Navarra.

The victory at an awards night in Vienna, will now see the Segura project qualify for the International River Foundation awards and a chance to win the prestigious Thiess International Prize.

Miguel-Angel Rodenas, President of the CHS got the prize and a ten thousand euro cheque from Bart Fokkens, Chair of the IRF European Riverprize judging panel, who said:-

“The Segura river management is a great example of an integrated approach with environmental, social and economic restoration activities. The established management framework includes a solid science foundation and shared governance, while the catchment management planning process was ahead of the European legislation requirement. These demonstrated innovations created almost a miracle under the scorching sun of Spain!”

Basques Celebrate

Two Columbians have been arrested by the National Police on suspicion of selling cocaine across Alicante Province and the Murcia region. The two men, aged in their late forties,

were arrested at Llano de Brujas in Murcia, and had operated in Elche amongst a variety of local municipalities.

Cash, mobile phones, and a kilo of cocaine was seized by the police.

Thousands of people in the heart of Spain's Basque country gave a hero's welcome to a veteran separatist leader following his release after more than six years behind bars. A crowd of more than ten thousand gathered in San Sebastián on Saturday to give a tumultuous greeting to Arnaldo Otegi after his release last week. "We are fighting for the liberty of this country and we will never stop," said Otegi, who has

ambitions to become the next leader of the region.

Many of his supporters queued in pouring rain for hours. Some carried banners demanding the release of about 400 members of the armed separatist group Eta from prisons in France and Spain. A key figure in the Basque breakaway movement, Otegi, 57, has spent a total of 15 years in prison for separatist acts. But he is also credited with helping

to swing the campaign away from the violence.

Otegi was jailed in 2011 for trying to resurrect the outlawed separatist party Batasuna. The party had been banned in 2003 for being the political wing of Eta, blamed for more than 800 killings in its long campaign to create an independent homeland in the Basque country, which straddles part of northern Spain and south-western France.

Tony Mayes - About Life

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Friday 11th March 2016

An Utter Waste Of Time!

A huge amount of money is going into research to produce driverless cars.

Goodness knows why?

Would you ever feel safe in one - I certainly wouldn't that is unless there was noone else on the road!

Google have been seriously dabbling into driverless cars but one of them came a cropper last month when it collided with a bus in California. Apparently the car’s pre-determined route was blocked by roadworks and it crossed over some lanes into the path of the bus! No-one was injured.

Google, which has been testing the vehicles near its Silicon Valley headquarters, said in January that it had had to intervene to stop its self-driving cars from crashing on California's roads 13 times over a 14 month period, and this gives me a tremendous lack of confidence. I suppose the only way these driverless cars would be safe is if all cars were driverless and then the machines would be able to predict accurately what every other car would do.

But how on earth could any machine accurately predict the wild antics of human drivers? Can you imagine a driverless car coping with a

Spanish roundabout and being able to understand which car was going all the way round and which one was peeling off. A recipe for disaster, I suggest.

Have you ended up with streaming eyes and nose when your other half wants to be romantic and light some scented candles and you try to stifle the discomfort rather than spoil the moment?

Air fresheners and some cleaners you spray from cans have the same effect on me - and now I know why. Scientists have discovered that these products carry harmful particles that can contribute to breathing problems, stress on the heart and cancer, according to a report by the Royal College of Physicians and the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health. My "highly tuned" body is obviously switched on to give me an early warning of these harmful products. Apparently the lemon and pine scents that we use to make our homes smell fresh can react chemically to generate air pollutants, and ozone-based air fresheners can also cause indoor air pollution. Other items that are exposing people to potentially harm-

ful pollutants include joss sticks, cookers, boilers, open fires and portable gas or paraffin heaters. Our ancestors had a fire burning in the centre of their oneroom huts and the smoke led to premature deaths for generations. Pollution in the home is just as important as in the open air from traffic and burning fossil fuels and is causing premature death to many thousands worldwide. So girls, if you want to create a romantic moment, come up with some less life threatening ideas.

One of the best TV shows is BBC 1’s Room 101 where guest celebrities list their biggest hates for the chance to get them banished forever, locked away in that Room 101, which, by now must be stacked to the roof with them. Anyway, it came to mind for me last week when in just ten minutes I came across two of mine. Candidate number one are cyclists who insist on riding the wrong way in the centre of a narrow road playing chicken with motorists. I came across one riding past the go-kart track in Playa Flamenca determined to demonstrate he had no fear by dicing with death. All totally stupid

when just a few yards away is a purpose-built cycle lane. Why the hell can't cyclists use them?

Candidate number two was a woman with a large Labrador dog on a lead which she took to the car park of the Chinese store just up the road from where I almost had the cyclist as a mascot on my bonnet. In the car park was a pile of recliners and she watched as the dog cocked its leg against them. Charming!

Despite all the bad news we keep hearing - killings despite a ceasefire in Syria and bombing in Northern Ireland with idiots still wanting to turn the province back to the bad old days, there come stories which give me real hope for the future. The first is the marvellous breakthrough by scientists who believe they have discovered the "Achilles heel" in cancer cells.

Researchers at University College, London, have developed a way of finding unique markings within a tumour, allowing the body to target the disease. The problem is that cancer cells are tricky little beasts, fooling the immune system so they are not attacked, allowing them to multiply unheeded. Also

cancers are not made up of identical cells - they are a heavily mutated, genetic mess and samples at different sites within a tumour can look and behave very differently, growing a bit like a tree with core "trunk" mutations, but then mutations that branch off in all directions. But scientists have discovered the "trunk" mutations that change antigens - the proteins that stick out from the surface of cancer cells.

Professor Charles Swanton, from the UCL Cancer Institute, added: "This is exciting. Now we can prioritise and target tumour antigens that are present in every cell - the Achilles heel of these highly complex cancers. This is really fascinating and takes personalised medicine to its absolute limit, where each patient would have a unique, bespoke treatment."

The other medical breakthrough gives real hope to people who have been paralysed through spinal injury. By taking DNA from one part of the body and putting it into the spine, the hope is it can grow the damaged spinal cord together. That may take years and endless hours of

physiotherapy, but it gives hope to those who have until now thought they face the rest of their lives in wheelchairs.

All this gives another massive headache for the NHS and future financing.

What must not happen are cures for illnesses not benefiting sufferers because of a shortage of money. The NHS is in a parlous state because it is already exceeding budgets and to ensure it is fit for purpose in future is going to be a real challenge.

And now to finish off with something different. We were in the company recently of a couple who confided in us about when they were young.

Apparently his job often took him away from the love of his life for a week or two.

When he had finished his job and was on his way home, his wife to be got a telepathic message that he was returning home. She told me: "I suddenly told my boss I had to go home early. I somehow knew he was on his way home, and sure enough he was soon there."

Apparently this didn't happen just once but many times. Makes you think, doesn't it?

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Friday 11th March 2016

News

Let There Be Light Torrevieja needs to spend six million euros over the next four years to improve the quality of street lighting across the municipality, according to public works councillor, Alejandro Blanco. He said that the problems largely go back to poor quality wiring that was used back in the eighties and nineties, and that the authority had inherited the problems from the previous Partido Popular administration.

Blanco said that the council planned to sort things out but cannot do everything in a matter of months. He mentioned

Beach Switch On

After years of weather abuse, waterproof traffic lights are to be installed in the Los Locos beach area of Torrevieja, after a string of failures caused by water damage during floods. In total, nearly 18 thousand euros is to be invested in the new signals at the junction of Calle Roentgen with Avenida de Mariano Ruiz, where the lights have been out of order since the last flooding.

The On Line Crooks

Three Romanians who allegedly conned at least 200 people in Spain by running an internet scam have been arrested by the Guardia Civil in Elche.

Two men and a woman, all said to be in their thirties, set up a whole range of fake websites selling goods that people “bought”, but they parted with their money, and got nothing back, despite ordering items ranging from bicycles to mobile phones.

The victims were all encouraged to pay into various bank accounts that the trio set up, most of which was done using false documents, with the Guardia rounding them up in Elche when they were in the process of setting another account up. They found the woman in possession of a bag with three thousand euros of cash in it.

The trio are said to have opened up accounts all over Spain, and a Guardia house raid found printing equipment that was used to produce fake identity documents used at the banks.

some 250 emergency callouts that had been made over the last three months to deal with complaints about lighting failures, with vandalism; copper wire theft; and meter tampering not helping the situation.

He said that only a comprehensive programme of

investment can sort out the problem with the urbanisations at La Florida, La Veleta, Las Villas, Las Barcas and Lago Jardín seen as some of the most urgent priorities, as well as completing an unfinished project left by the previous council at Acequión.

Baby Duties

Guardia Civil officers performed an unusual duty when they delivered a baby in the middle of the night on a motorway hard-shoulder near Madrid. The mother and her husband were on their way to hospital in the early hours when they came across a patrol car on the A1 and asked for help, since it appeared the baby may be about to make an appearance before they reached their destination.

The two officers escorted the car and called an ambulance just in case – but less than two kilometres later, they had to stop as the

baby was already coming.

As a result, the police officers had to deliver the baby – although they kept in constant contact with paramedics who were on their way to ensure they were doing everything they should.

Once the ambulance arrived, staff checked the mother and her new daughter – who weighed three kilos – and confirmed they were both in good health. The family was taken to the San José Quirónsalud hospital in Madrid, with mother and daughter said to be doing very well.

Run Rabbit Run

All year-round permission has been given to hunt down wild rabbits that are causing mayhem for farmers across Alicante Province. The Valencian Government reports that the creatures are damaging vineyards in the Vinalopó valley as well as

ravaging through cereal crops. The Orihuela, Pilar de la Horadada, and San Miguel de Salinas municipalities have been given permission in the past over wild rabbit hunting because of the agricultural nature of those areas.

Tiny Tremor A small earthquake hit part of the Murcia Region just after 5.00 am on Tuesday, and measured three point two on

the Richter scale. The quake was said to have been felt in three towns – Mazarrón, Totana and Lorca.

Tel: 965 052 567 Mob: 669 824 380

News

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Friday 11th March 2016

Nasty Mummy

A seven-year-old child who was locked up in a bedroom by his mother when she went to work was freed by the local police and fire-fighters in Almonte in Huelva province last Friday. The emergency services were called out by neighbours who heard the little boy 'crying inconsolably' from a balcony window. The bedroom door was secured with chains and padlocks and no adult was apparently on the premises.

Police and firefighters found the little boy 'extremely dirty' and very hungry, and the room in 'appalling conditions of hygiene'. They took him to the local health centre for treatment, given his state of extreme anxiety, and to get him cleaned up,

Lighten Up San Javier’s mayor, José Miguel Luengo, is trying to get the major local landmark of the Estacio lighthouse open as a tourist attraction.

The mayor believes it would be a useful addition to the tourist portfolio for La Manga, and he’s asked the Cartagena Port Authority boss, Antonio Sevilla, to investigate to possibility further.

New Gaffer before handing him to the social services' women and children unit to be cared for.

Inquiries revealed this was not a one-off incident, but that the child's mother left him locked and chained in on every nonschool day for some 10 hours when she went to

work. Medical reports showed possible signs of 'violent episodes', and two witnesses were traced who were able to confirm that the boy had suffered physical aggression at his mother's hands. He has been temporarily placed in a children's home and his mother, was arrested.

are seriously in the money.

The Organización Nacional de Ciegos Españoles (ONCE) is a charity founded 77 years ago to raise funds for the blind and

people with serious visual impairment. The lottery is their big money spinner, and the Santa Pola tickets were sold on Calle Ramón y Cajal.

Nice Try A Polish passenger travelling through Alicante Bus station thought he could not outsmart the drug sniffer dogs by wrapping his six hashish portions in lavender

and putting them in his suitcase. He was sadly mistaken as the dog sniffed out something strange in the case which had been put in the coach’s hold. The 37-

year-old traveller, who initially denied that the luggage was his, owned up and was promptly charged in court with a crime against public health.

A Benidorm woman has pleaded guilty this week, ten years after lying about having a bone marrow operation in order to try to get a successful unfair dismissal claim against her previous employers, the Consum supermarket chain. An Alicante court sentenced her to four months in jail as well as a 180 euro fine for forging a document, and paying five thousand euros in compensation to Consum.

The case goes back as far as 2005 and 2006.

Doing Less Time

Congratulations!

Ten winning ONCE lottery tickets worth 35 thousand euros each have been sold in Santa Pola with Tuesday’s draw meaning some lucky people

Decade Later

Luis Lombarte (pictured on the extreme left), started work on Monday as chief of police at Alicante-Elche airport, after seven years running the local police in Orihuela.

Lombarte comes with 34 years experience with the National Police having served as well in Benidorm, Elche, Barcelona and Madrid.

Lombarte has 60 people working for him at El Altet, and was officially introduced as the new boss at a ceremony attended by provincial commissioner, José Javier Cuasante López; Elche police chief, María Jesús Bustos Quiñones; and AlicanteElche airport director, Santiago Martínez-Cava Arenas.

A man who strangled his uncle and aunt to death with a belt at their Santiago de la Ribera home in December 2012, has had his jail sentence cut on appeal by the Supreme Court.

José Miguel RC was given 36 years behind bars, and ordered to pay around 30 thousand euros in compensation to relatives. His defence was that he had no memory of the events and did not know what he was doing because he was high on drugs.

The sentence was reduced to 31 and a half years.

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Local & News

Friday 11th March 2016

Store Support

Staff at the Iceland supermarket in San Javier have voted for HAH Mar Menor to be their chosen local charity for 2016, with a number of HAH volunteers going there to say thank you and to meet the staff. Lesley

Eburne, HAH founder/Manager said, “We are delighted that we have been chosen, and hope to raise lots of money in-store throughout the year. We have collection tins in place which are filling up nicely.

Cheers To Mums

A hearty lunch and close to 200 euros was raised at the recent sell-out Mother’s Day Lunch organised by Help At Home Mar Menor at Ruf Mari, in Los Urrutias.

Entertainment came from J J Soulman with a bucket

collection producing a generous 190 euros for the charity. If you are interested in becoming a HAH volunteer, Telephone 633 673 034 or you can e-mail our team at the address below helpathomespain@gmail.com

Fresh Start

MABS Murcia Mar Menor have opened their brand new cancer centre in San Javier, with Beverley Reed (pictured right) welcoming the first client to the centre for complementary treatment. The facility is centrally located in San Javier, just around the corner from the old charity shop, which is also moving in a few weeks to be right next door to the centre which is on Avenida Ramon y Cajal 12.

The centre is a place to drop in anytime on a weekday between 10.00am and 2.00pm for a confidential chat about any cancer related issues as well as a cup of tea or coffee. It will also offer complementary treatments such as a massage to cancer patients should they need it and this continues past the active treatment stage. It will also be home to the Care & Share meetings for anyone affected by cancer. The phone number is 868 171 035 and a volunteer will always take the time to chat with you. MABS are always looking for volunteers, you can call Sylvia on 634 306 035, as well as keeping up to date on MABS events on Facebook.

AFA Boost

Torrevieja’s Alzheimer’s Association is better off to the tune of eleven hundred euros after a recent charity night at the Restaurante El Alto La Dolores, in Guardamar, which featured entertainment from Woody.

AFA’s president, Maria Purficacion Garcia Alvares is pictured getting the cheque from organisers Marlene Brown and Joan Rampton.

Choirs Together

The Torrevieja-based Crescendo International Choir (pictured) is to put a special concert in May with the Chivenor branch of the Military Wives choir, raising money for two major charities. The special joint concert will be on Saturday May 7th at the Torrevieja

Christian Fellowship church on Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas, starting at 5.00pm. Tickets, priced at 10 euros each can be obtained by calling Mary Mitchell on 965 725 641.

Once expenses have been covered, proceeds from the concert will be

shared between the Torrevieja branch of the Royal British Legion (which is Crescendo’s charity) and S.S.A.F.A. (The Soldiers, Sailors, Airmen and Families Association), which is the nominated beneficiary for the Military Wives.

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Neglected Horse Oscar Stays

Police have stepped in to stop a group of people from reclaiming a neglected horse called Oscar that was seized and put under the Rojales-based Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre’s protection in December. When found three months ago at a property near the San Luis salt lake in Torrevieja, the horse was so thin he was labelled a “walking skeleton”..

But last month, Oscar’s alleged owners arrived at the Rojales rescue centre with a transit van, saying they had come to collect him. Rescue centre cofounder Rod Weeding called the Rojales council, which then sent several police officers to the scene.

“Police told these

Pets

Friday 11th March 2016

people that they weren’t allowed to take the horse without the correct paperwork, and that they certainly couldn’t take him away in a Ford transit van,” centre cofounder Sue Weeding said.

“We are determined that this horse not be returned to these people as without painkillers and specialist medical intervention, he will not survive. He’s about 17, still very thin and has problems with the joints of all four legs from being overworked. He had shoes on when he was rescued, so they were obviously still riding him.

“We can’t thank the police and council enough for stepping in to make sure that this horse was kept safe.”

The Best Of Friends Are you thinking of getting a dog but afraid your cat won't like it, or vice- versa?

While many cats and dogs don't get along right off the bat, there are ways to help them adjust to living with each other. By taking your time and understanding what both of your pets need, you can create a happy, peaceful home with both a cat and a dog.

Prepare for the introduction. To begin with, make sure that your home has ample space for the two pets to have some space away from each other for several days, so multiple rooms in your home are necessary. Don't let the first encounter your cat has with your dog be a bad one because of an overzealous and aggressive pup. If you are introducing a new dog to your home or you have a young puppy that doesn't know its commands yet, then you need to be more cautious when introducing it to a cat.

Go slow. Do NOT just let

your dog chase your cat around. Keep the pets separate at first, waiting three or four days before actually introducing the animals face to face.

Animals need time to get to know each other's smells and to get to know new homes before they can deal with getting to know another animal.

Alternate the rooms you keep the animals in. This is so they can sniff where each other has been without the other animal being present.

Smells are a very important way that animals get to know each other. Let your animals get to know the other's smell before they actually get to know them face to face. Try rubbing a towel on your dog and then putting the towel under your cat's bowl. This will help your cat get used to the dogs smell and accept it.

Let the cat and dog smell each other under the door dividing them. This will help them associate the new smells they are smelling with a specific animal, even if

they can't actually see it.

Wait to introduce your cat and dog until the cat seems relaxed and ready. If the cat is frightened and runs and hides whenever the dog gets near the door to their room, you need to give the cat more time. When the cat is adjusted to the smell and sounds of the dog, it may be time to let them see each other.

Hold your cat in your arms until it is calm and relaxed.

Then ask a family member or friend to slowly bring your dog on a leash into the room.

Gradually bring the dog closer in small steps, waiting for your cat and dog to both settle down as each step of the way before getting closer. Do not let the animals make physical contact with each other, just get them used to the presence of the other. Be sure to hold the cat only if it is happy to be held.

Another option is to have the cat in a crate while you bring the dog in on a leash. This will guarantee that there is not physical contact between

them when they first meet.

Show your pets equal amounts of love as you introduce them to each other. Animals, like people, get jealous when 'the new kid' gets more attention than them. Show both of your pets that they are loved by you and that the other animal is not feared by you.

Separate your pets once again. Don't force them to interact for too long, this will just exhaust them, which can lead to conflict. Make sure the first meeting is a good one by keeping it brief and pleasant.

Continue to have your dog and cat interact until they are relaxed in each other's presence. Once the cat seems comfortable enough, keep the dog on leash but let the cat go loose in the room.

After several weeks of this, your dog should be trained not to go after the cat, as so you can let the dog off the leash as well, and you now hopefully have the best of animal friends enjoying life together!

Pets Corner: Can You take in a Homeless Dog or Cat?

BLACKIE Blackie is aged between two and three and is one of those loving and loyal dogs that will do anything to please you. He has had such a bad life he truly deserves a kind loving owner that will appreciate him. He is great with other dogs and he has such a lovely disposition that he will be fine with cats too.

For more please phone PEPA on 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail.com

CHIP K9 rescued a gorgeous elderly lady called Chip, after she was abandoned. She is about seven and a half years old, and was very traumatised. Within an hour she was snuggling up to everybody and just wanting some love, and has really hit off with the K9 kennel manager and the rest of the team. If you would be interested in adopting Chip then call 600 845 420.

HARRY When Harry was rescued as a puppy he looked like his brothers and sister, but now they're grown up, they look like Great Danes and Harry is the odd one out!

He loves being with people and is full of energy, so he needs space and someone able to exercise and play with him.

To meet Harry and the rest of his family, please call 630 422 563 or 616 210 850.

STEEL Steel has now been with us a couple of months and has grown into a very handsome young boy. He is four years old, and is all clear medically.

He is a very playful boy, and loves to go for a walk, with a gentle nature and would make a great companion. If you think that Steel could steal your heart then please contact the SAT kennels on 966 710 047 or email info@satanimalrescue.com

TOBY Toby was found in a very thin and bedraggled state he is now very healthy and ready to go to a home. He is such a lovely boy who is really good with the other dogs and people but is not a cat fan! He is very loving and has a very sweet nature. If you can offer Toby a home or for more information please phone PEPA on 650 304 746 or send an email to: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail.com

TODD Todd is a very lively six month old terrier type who walked into the K9 La Marina Shop.

He has been checked out by a vet and declared very fit.

He has obviously been well looked after as he is used to people and other dogs.

Todd loves travelling in a car, and is a small dog with a big personality. If you want to give Todd a home please call 600 845 420 or 610 832 726.

Friday 11th March 2016

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Dave Silver

Friday 11th March 2016

Wishing You A Very Happy‌.

Whatever It Is! MRS S is totally and truly unhappy with me only two days in the year.

The rest of the time she's okay about living with me although sometimes I suspect that if she could live her life over again she would have taken the train to John O'Groats on the day we were destined to meet for the first time.

The reason that Mrs S turns particularly cool towards me in the aforementioned 48 hours is perhaps obvious to other folk in relationships.

Yes, you are quite correct.

I tend to forget both her birthday and her wedding anniversary. Ouch! I meant OUR wedding anniversary.

I offer no excuse other than that of priorities. While Mrs S takes care of the minutiae of our everyday lives, I deal with the big

issues such as should Britain withdraw from the European Union or do I reckon that Rooney would be better playing up front on the following Saturday.

Anyway, the other morning I decided to head off Mrs S's ire by remembering her birthday in good time.

With my garage-purchased floppy bunch of elderly carnations in one hand and a bargain box of chocolates in the other I engaged her attention as she came downstairs to make my breakfast egg and toast before starting her own daily chores.

'Happy birthday, darling!' I said, holding out my gifts.

Mrs S raised her eyebrows in an expression I had witnessed before, usually and puzzlingly on the occasions I had FORGOTTEN her birthday.

Mrs S lowered her eyebrows so that she could concentrate all her facial muscles on shaping her lips in order to speak to me aggressively.

'Today is NOT my birthday!' she enunciated perfectly.

I quickly withdrew my gifts from her view and thought of something to say to cover my confusion.

The brain cells which controlled my thinking slowly formed a circuit and I held out the dying flowers and cheap chocolates once again.

'Happy anniversary, darling!' I said.

The same raised eyebrows, then the puckering of lips followed by: 'Today is NOT my -- or even our -anniversary.

I had to admit that I was stumped. No birthday, no

anniversary. Then what the heck was it?

'I'll tell you what today is.

It's Wednesday!' Mrs S explained (?).

I wanted to scratch my head in puzzlement but the chocolates and the flowers (which had by now given up their life struggle) left me with no free hand with which to rub at my scalp.

So instead I cast my mind back to when I had spotted the blue ballpoint pen ring circling Wednesday's date on the calendar hanging in the kitchen.

'Why on earth would you single out the date if it wasn't your birthday or anniversary?'

'Because,' responded Mrs S through clenched teeth, 'I have an appointment with the dentist.'

'Ah, I said. 'So that's why you wrote the time of 2pm

next to the inked circle. I took it to be the exact time you were born.'

Slipping the dead flowers into the bin, I opened the chocolates and said: 'If you're seeing the dentist later I'd best first remove the caramels.'

Seconds later, I gazed into the empty choc box and mumbled: 'Oh, dear, they were ALL caramels.'

Mrs S gave a long-suffering sigh. 'I'm off to the dentist's after I've prepared your egg and soldiers. Actually, it would help me if you could get your own breakfast this morning.'

'I don't think so,' I said.

'You're a much better cook than me. I happen to take after my father in the chef stakes. He once drained the water from a pan of boiled potatoes but even the fragmented spuds disappeared

down the plughole.

'And there was that other time when he boiled a whole packet of rice. Poor Dad didn't realise that the granules swell to three times their normal size and, when he tried to get back into the kitchen, the door wouldn't open.'

'Hmm,' mused Mrs S. 'The apple didn't fall far from the tree.'

'No, Dad was quite good with fruit,' I corrected her. 'It was when he had to boil stuff that the wheels came off.

'Anyway, why are you leaving the house so early?'

I asked. 'Can you no longer stand my company?'

'Not at all,' said Mrs S, sweeping up bits of flowers and the odd chocolate caramel from the floor. 'I thought I'd first pop into the rail station to check the time of trains to John O'Groats.'

Friday 11th March 2016

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Friday 11th March 2016

TRELI ON THE TELLY WITH ALEX TRELINSKI

In the pre-Downton Abbey era, I’d humbly suggest that ITV would have run a mile if anybody had come up to them with the suggestion of a three part adaptation of a relatively unknown Anthony Trollope tale. But since the script has been done by Downton’s boss Julian Fellowes and the network knows that a tale of class does the business for them, there’s no real surprise that last Sunday saw the premiere of Doctor Thorne and very good it is as well. Not everything that Fellowes does turns to gold, and his wretched Titanic sunk without trace four years ago (I could not resist the pun about a show where the iceberg had more personality than the characters!).

This territory suits Fellowes to a tee, and this mid-19th century tale stars a very good Tom Hollander in the title role and looks at the dilemma of his niece possibly inheriting a fortune. The show is a winner! The man with the money, who happened to kill her father, is

Doctor’s Right Prescription

played by a scene-skilling Ian McShane in a rare UK TV appearance which showed him at his very best.

There isn’t much wrong with Doctor Thorne except that I got fed up with the constant National Trust showreel of stately homes (clearly done with an American market in mind, especially with the name of the impresario Harvey Weinstein on the credits), and one of the worst and most nauseating musical scores I have heard on a TV drama, which just got in the way and had me laughing at times. Those gripes aside, I thought it was a great watch but I also thought it strange that ITV scheduled Doctor Thorne directly against the halfway point of the brilliant Night Manager over on BBC1 (ironically also having Tom Hollander as one of the stars). That explained why The Night Manager won the ratings battle hands-down, but do catch up with Doctor Thorne. It’s worth it.

There’s a big gaping hole in the Sunday schedule that

not even this weekend’s return of Antiques Roadshow will be able to fill, and that’s the absence of Call The Midwife on BBC1. What a tear-jerking finale with Sister Evangelina (the excellent Pam Ferris) dying from a stroke (discovered by Fred) and the aftermath beautifully played out with a moving funeral cortege. Add the despair and sadness over good old Dr. Turner dealing

with the mothers who took Thalidomide, and it was an outstanding hour of a drama that mixes a graphic social commentary on the early sixties along with top notch story telling. Roll on the Christmas special and the next series in 2017.

I hate it when TV companies muck around with shows, and such was the case with the start of the heavily-promoted DC’s Legends of Tomorrow on

Sky One. It’s good fun featuring characters that we have already met in shows like Arrow and The Flash, as they combine to fight a baddie that wants to destroy everything on our happy planet, plus he is more indestructible than Captain Scarlet. US viewers got the full two-hour opener, but silly Sky split the feature-length start into two parts, so all we got was a lengthy set up in the first

episode, before we got down to the real business last night. As a bit of trivia, the production team are mega fans of Doctor Who, which explains John Barrowman and to a lesser degree Alex Kingston making appearances on Arrow.

The time-travelling lead of Rip Hunter in Legends of Tomorrow is played by Arthur Darvill, who was Rory in Doctor Who during the Matt Smith era. Now if Smith and David Tennant could be persuaded……..?

It’s farewell to Mr. Selfridge tonight on ITV for what has been the best series yet, which means the story ends on a high, though not for store owner Harry. Jeremy Piven’s portrayal this time round has made him more likeable and sympathetic, though still rash and foolish.

Meanwhile on Monday, it’s bye for now (it’s sure to return based on mega US ratings) for Mulder and Scully after a patchy yet still enjoyable revival of The X Files, airing on Channel Five.

See You at the St Patrick´s Day Parade

TKO Radio, are once again proud to be the official radio station for the Cabo Roig St Patrick´s Day fiesta.

The biggest and best celebration of St Patrick in the whole of Spain, where nationalities from around the globe come to party.

TKO Radio will be there with the outside broadcast unit, hosting the main event, the parade and the entire afternoon, with singers, dancers, the speaches by the attending dignitories, all taking place on the TKO Stage, plus, come along and meet ALL of your favourite presenters from TKO Radio, as they take it in turn to broadcast across the airwaves and come to play host to the event in person. We will have lots of giveaways, you can take your pictures in our special TKO Photo Board and share it on social network sites, and you can use the hashtag #tkopaddys for a chance to have your picture featured here next week.

We look forward to seeing you on Thursday 17th March at Cabo Roig, the only place to be this St Patrick´s Day.

Friday 11th March 2016

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Britain’s Secret Slavery Business

Darragh MacIntyre Friday - BBC Two Investigative journalist Darragh MacIntyre exposes the reality of modern-day slavery and exploitation in Britain.

From our factories and food producers, our car-

washes and nail bars this one-off current affairs documentary lifts the lid on how exploited workers are embedded in parts of our economy.

In Dewsbury, West Yorkshire, Darragh hears

from one of the Hungarians trafficked to work at Kozee Sleep, a bed factory which supplied to major high street retailers. He reveals how the workers were promised a good job but were paid as little as £10 a week and forced to live in slum-type conditions.

The film reveals how people are exploited up and down the country, from the fishing industry in Scotland to the car washes in London. And shockingly, it reveals that this problem not only affects migrants from Europe and other parts of the world - but also people from the UK. Darragh speaks to a vulnerable British man who was abducted off the streets, taken to a South

Wales farm and forced to work unpaid for 13 years.

The context and scale of modern-day slavery is outlined by Kevin Hyland, the UK’s first Independent AntiSlavery Commissioner. The Police, outreach workers, and psychologists explain how these exploited people are controlled and are often too scared to even think of escaping.

The programme comes just as the National Crime Agency reveals that the number of suspected victims identified here has risen by 40 percent in just one year. Officials believe that the increase is down to better enforcement, but others worry it might be because of ever increasing exploitation.

Doors Close On A Shopping Era

It is the end of a shopping era on Friday as the doors to Selfridge´s close for what is likely to be the very last time.

Although ITV have neither confirmed or denied if there is going to be a fifth series, two of the lead actors, including Mr Selfridge himself, Jeremy Piven, and actress Amanda Abbington, both let slip on Twitter that they would not be returning to filming. In addition, American TV have confirmed that they won´t be taking another series and it has been cancelled over the pond, and so, much to the sadness of many, it looks like the closed sign will be hanging on the virtual door after

this week.

However, we still have the excitement of the finale to get through and Jimmy’s final act has left Harry reeling; he blames himself for everything that’s happened.

Mae’s love life, Harry’s judgement, Selfridge’s and Whiteley’s are now all under the spotlight of a tabloid frenzy. Serious questions about Harry’s financial stability are rife.

Harry retreats from the glare, isolating himself at home. He refuses to see anyone, even Mae. Gordon is left to run the store and keep an increasingly tetchy Mr Keen at bay. Then, when Chairman Hardcastle finds

that stock was secretly moved from Selfridge’s to Whiteley’s - to plug the gap caused by his trade embargo – he explodes with fury.

Making a stand, Hardcastle places Selfridge’s under an immediate embargo too until all debts are paid.

The situation is catastrophic. Selfridge’s itself is in real jeopardy for the first time. Gordon is stunned.

He’s busy planning celebrations of the store’s 20th anniversary – which is imminent. Stymied and frustrated, Gordon implores Harry to come back to his own store – where he’s needed.

Harry pulls himself together and returns to face the music. There, Harry encounters an angry Mae who confronts him about his cowardly absence. Mae is at the end of her tether after also being subjected to intense gossip and fevered speculation. She feels totally abandoned by Harry. After all they’ve been through, Mae expected more. Harry’s apologies just aren’t enough; their relationship hangs in the balance.

Meanwhile, Mardle has returned to work at Selfridge’s. It isn’t long before Harry makes her a poignant and visionary offer that she can’t refuse. In the corridors of Selfridge’s, we get the sense of a new generation ‘moving in’, that a breeze of change is in the air… Next, Harry looks to tackle the crippling embargos. He forges an ambitious plan to seduce Chairman Hardcastle and the other aggrieved suppliers. Harry knows he can’t afford to pay their debts, so he has to offer them something very special. Organising a lavish reception, Harry offers the suppliers unprecedented fixed term contracts to supply both Whiteley’s and Selfridge’s. Harry is in full, charming showman mode.

Everything rests on this final gamble…

However, an unstoppable chain of events sees Harry backed into a corner. Gordon is forced act in the best interests of the store. The Earl of Oxford Street is called to account in a shocking, epic and gut-wrenching climax.

Houdini & Doyle

New to Sunday on ITV, Stephen Mangan (Episodes) plays Sir Arthur Conan Doyle alongside Michael Weston (Six Feet Under, House) as Harry Houdini, two of the most fascinating and iconic characters of the early 20th century: real-life friends, real-life adversaries, real-life crime solvers.

Harry Houdini: master magician, escape artist, born penniless and now the highest paid performer in the world and he wants everyone to know it. He refuses to believe in the paranormal.

As a professional magician and master of illusion he knows there’s nothing supernatural about magic. To him, everything unexplained is a trick, a gimmick, or a fraud.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle is the creator of the greatest detective of all time Sherlock Holmes - but is also a passionate believer in the paranormal. Because, having lost someone very close to him, he desperately wants to find a way of communicating with them.

This fundamental difference between the two men leads to conflict... and humour... and competition.

High-minded competition in the pursuit of the truth and

ridiculous petty competition because they’re... guys. But despite all this, they need each other. Doyle needs Houdini because he is gullible. Houdini needs Doyle because he is wrong.

Houdini & Doyle draws heavily on the rich history of the period. At the turn of the 20th century the Metropolitan Police, mired in the ways of the 19th century, were overwhelmed with bizarre and often inexplicable cases so they turned to outsiders including, believe it or not, Houdini and Doyle, who collaborated with New Scotland Yard on some unsolved and inexplicable crimes.

What can we believe?

What should we believe? Is cynicism to be admired or is it what makes us human? Is reason the antithesis of hope?

In episode 1, The Maggie’s Redress, Houdini, Doyle and Adelaide investigate the murder of a nun in one of the notorious Magdalene Laundries. A witness claims the killer is a young woman who was tormented by the nun. The only problem is, that young woman has been dead for six months.

Stop / Start

TOWIE 200 - The Power Of TOWIE

On ITV Be on Sunday, The Only Way Is Essex celebrates a milestone 200 episodes with a special documentary looking at how Essex became a pop culture

phenomenon. Narrated by Mark Wright, the retrospective features interviews with some of TOWIE's most popular faces past and present, including Joey Essex,

Gemma Collins, and Amy Childs. Since launching in October 2010, the show has brought fans some of the most talked about moments on British television, - count-

less dramatic moments, tearful break ups, heart warming get togethers, OMG fashion statements and some very interesting choices of vocabulary.

After successful runs on Radio 4, Jack Docherty’s sharp sitcom about three marriages in various stages of disrepair makes its television debut as part of the BBC Comedy Playhouse series.

Featuring a stellar cast, Stop/Start is a warm and smart comedy in which the characters are able to stop the action, explain themselves to the audience and start it all up again. It revolves around the stories of three couples: Rob (Jack Docherty) and Cathy (Kerry Godliman) have been married for ages and it shows; Evan (John Thomson) and

Fiona (Sarah Hadland) seem to be living in one big, noisy argument, punctuated by unexpected moments of passion; and 60-something David (Nigel Havers) and Georgy (Laura Aikman) who’s in her 30s, each have nagging feeling that the age gap could be a bit of a stretch for their relationship.

Rob is coy about telling Cathy that Georgy, who has just moved into the neighbourhood with David, is part of his past. And when he’s called on to make a short speech at his own house party, hapless Rob is in danger of talking himself into another tight corner.

5

Friday 11th March 07:15 Heir Hunters 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Claimed and Shamed 09:15 MasterChef: The Professionals 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 The Chef’s Protege 14:30 Portillo’s State Secrets 15:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 16:00 The Doctor Blake Mysteries 16:50 Mountain 17:50 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 18:20 Bargain Hunt 20:30 Match of the Day 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Too Live: Reading v Crystal Much TV Palace Gary Lineker presents coverage of the sixth- 20:00 The Great Interior round tie, which takes place Design Challenge The final at the Madejski Stadium, as programme brings together the world’s oldest domestic the ultimate rules of design, room by room, featuring cup competition continues. insider techniques for a betThe home side will be hop- ter home ing to reach the semi-finals for the second consecutive 21:00 Mastermind Quiz year, but Brian McDermott’s Championship outfit know 21:30 Gardeners’ World they face a tough task Monty is tidying up his ornaPremier mental grass border, pruntheir against ing roses and planning for League opponents. Alan summer scent Pardew’s team knocked out Tottenham Hotspur in the 22:00 Land of Hope and last round, and will be keen Glory - British Country to be among the last four for Life Jane Treays spends a visiting cottages, the first time since the year manor houses and castles 1994/95 season through the eyes of the 23:00 News 23:35 Comedy magazine Playhouse 00:05 Catherine 23:00 Britain’s Secret Tate’s Nan 00:35 The Slavery Business 23:30 Celebrity Apprentice USA Newsnight 00:00 Artsnight Celebrity 00:30 Film - Midnight in the The 02:00 Apprentice USA 03:25 Garden of Good and Evil Weather for the Week (15) 03:00 Question Time 04:00 Tomorrow’s Food Ahead 03:30 News

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Claimed and Shamed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Moving On 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 The TV That Made Me 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Jeremy Kyle’s Emergency Room 16:00 Masterpiece with Alan Titchmarsh 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Charity twists the knife 20:30 Coronation Street Michael’s plans go awry 21:00 Best Walks with a View with Julia Bradbury From a location hidden beneath the Pennines, Julia sets off from the Cumbrian village of Dufton in search of one of Britain’s best-kept secrets High Cup Nick 21:30 Coronation Street Rana encourages the rebel in Zeedan 22:00 Mr Selfridge In the final episode, Harry’s judgement, Whiteley’s and even Lady Mae’s love life are now all under the spotlight of a tabloid frenzy.

Jimmy’s final act has Harry reeling and the retail mogul retreats from the publicity for the sanctuary of home 23:00 News 23:40 Benidorm 00:10 Film - The Spy Who Loved Me (PG) 02:25 Jackpot247 04:00 Murder, She Wrote 04:50 ITV Nightscreen

07:00 Countdown 07:45 King of Queens 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Car SOS 12:00 Undercover Boss Canada 13:00 News 13:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 A New Life in the Sun 18:00 Couples Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News 20:30 Crufts 2016 Clare Balding hosts coverage continued from More 4 of the 125th anniversary of the world’s largest dog event live from the NEC in Birmingham, with extensive highlights of the main arena events. This evening includes discussions on canine health and welfare, with Professor Noel Fitzpatrick, Kate Bevan and Nick Blayney

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:15 Cowboy Builders 13:10 News 13:15 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Killer Date 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 The Gadget Show Ortis and Jon join forces to take on Amazon Prime at transport tech and Yue Xu is in California to look at the future of food 21:00 Kitten Impossible Compilation of clips posted on the internet featuring cats performing physical feats or demonstrating lightning reactions, sporting and athletic skills, super intelligence or bravery

22:00 Gogglebox Britain’s favourite opinionated TV viewers share their sharp, insightful, passionate and sometimes emotional critiques of the week’s biggest and best shows

22:00 NCIS: New Orleans A case in which the team investigate the death of a crack, female pilot who seems to be responsible for her high-flying career crashing down to earth

23:00 The Last Leg 00:10 Raised by Wolves 00:40 Rude Tube 01:40 Virtually Famous 02:25 Film - Devil (15) 03:45 Ultimate Dealer 04:10 Beat My Build 05:05 Location, Location, Location

23:00 NCIS 23:55 NCIS: Los Angeles 00:55 Access 01:00 Super Casino 04:10 Cats Make You Laugh Out Loud 05:00 Grannies Make You Laugh Out Loud 05:45 House Doctor

DON´T MISS

On This Day

MR SELFRIDGE Harry’s judgement, Whiteley’s and even Lady Mae’s love life are now all under the spotlight of a tabloid frenzy. Jimmy’s final act has Harry reeling and the retail mogul retreats from the publicity for the sanctuary of home. Mae, now at the end of her tether, contemplates her future in London. The threat of a trade embargo imposed by Hardcastle sees acting boss Gordon backed into a corner, and Harry called to account. Drama, starring Jeremy Piven, Katherine Kelly and Greg Austin. Last in the series

ITV 22:00 Moses for the day - with a SOAPS plan clearly forming.

Charity soon heads to see Emma, where she twists the knife by using Moses as a bargaining tool. Will Emma take the bait and give Charity what she wants?

In Emmerdale Wanting Charity out of her house, Moira drops all of her belongings at the pub.

Charity is annoyed that Noah will still be staying with Moira and Cain.

Later, Charity is on the hunt for cash and asks Ross if he wants to start up the chop shop again.

When he refuses, she tells him that she’s taking

Meanwhile, Megan finds it hard to accept the news from the doctor. How much more can she take?

In Coronation Street, When Eileen asks Jason to run her to the bank, Phelan steps in and offers to take her instead. Andy is suspicious and voices his fears to Michael, who is a man on a mission.

As Phelan and Eileen make to leave, Eileen is incensed to discover Michael hiding in the back of the van, intent on spying on them. Eileen is furious, telling Todd that Michael is now right to worry he might lose her.

Finding Michael’s wallet in the van, Phelan calls at Number 11, where Eileen is clearly upset. Phelan puts a comforting arm

2004: Many die as bombs destroy Madrid trains around her, just as Michael lets himself in.

How will he react?

Meanwhile, when Kylie arrives at her client Sadie’s house for a nail appointment, she’s shown in by Sadie’s husband Freddie. Freddie explains that Sadie has died and he’d like her to do Sadie’s nails for her funeral.

Putting thoughts of Callum’s body aside, Kylie sets to work and Freddie is grateful. Later, Audrey and David are stunned when the new work experience girl arrives at the salon and it’s none other than Gemma!

In the second episode,

Michael is furious, convinced that he’s caught Eileen and Phelan in the act. Michael takes a swing at Phelan with his crutch but falls to the floor. Eileen is mortified and tells Michael their relationship is over.

Later, with his contempt for Phelan palpable, Michael drowns his sorrows in the pub. Gail is pleased to hear from Liz that Eileen has finished with Michael. Audrey coolly points out to Gail that Michael is not much of a catch.

Not long afterwards, Eileen is floored when Phelan admits that

07:00 Planet’s Funniest Animals 07:20 Dinner Date 08:10 Ellen DeGeneres 09:00 Emmerdale 10:00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Dinner Date 12:15 Royal Pains 13:10 Emmerdale 14:15 You’ve Been Framed 14:45 Ellen DeGeneres 15:40 Judge Rinder 16:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:50 Take Me Out 20:00 You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Film - Run, Fat Boy, Run (12) 00:05 Family Guy ITV3 07:00 Doctor in the House 07:25 Heartbeat 08:25 Where the Heart is 09:30 The Royal10:35Judge Judy 11:55 Wycliffe 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat 15:00 The Royal 16:05 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor in the House 17:45 In Loving Memory 18:15 On the Buses 18:50 Heartbeat 19:55 Murder, She Wrote 20:55 Sherlock Holmes 22:00 Long Lost Family 23:00 A Touch of Frost 01:20 Film Something’s Gotta Give (12) 03:30 Long Lost Family 04:20 Rory Bremner’s Great British Views ITV4 07:00 Goals of the 90s 07:10 Magnum, PI 08:05 The Chase 09:05 The Professionals 10:05 The Sweeney 11:10 Ax Men 12:10 The Chase 13:15 Pawn Stars 13:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 18:15 Storage Wars 18:45 The Car Chasers 19:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 00:15 Film - Village of the Damned (15) 02:20 Hell on Wheels (PG) 03:15 Car Chasers 03:45 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping

07:00 Peter Hurst, 10:00 Trev Massey, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Gordon Lack 19:00 Andy James Michael was right and he does in fact have feelings for her!

Meanwhile, Kylie gets a shock when she arrives back at the salon to find Gemma there. Tearful Gemma pleads for a chance to turn her life around, but David wants her out. Gemma makes to leave, but bumps into a pregnant Sarah and the cat’s out of the bag.

Saturday 12th March

6 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Mary Berry’s Foolproof Cooking 13:00 News 13:10 Football Focus 14:00 Bargain Hunt 15:00 Homes Under the Hammer 16:00 Flog It 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:30 Final Score 18:00 News 18:20 Match of the Day Live: Everton v Chelsea

07:15 Animal Park 08:10 Homes Under the Hammer 09:10 Film - Station West (PG) 10:40 Film - The Master of Ballantrae (PG) 12:10 Natural World 13:00 Rick Stein’s India 14:00 The Best Dishes Ever 15:00 Film - An Ideal Husband (PG) 16:30 Coast 17:15 The TV That Made Me 18:00 Big Dreams 19:00 Spaces Small 20:30 The Voice UK The Gardeners’ World 19:30 coaches watch each of their Queen Victoria’s Children eight contestants perform and must choose the best 20:30 Back in Time for the three acts from their team Weekend The family disto continue on to the live cover what the future might shows hold for our free time

07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:25 Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 07:45 Share a Story 07:50 Sooty 08:05 Super 4 08:15 Looped 08:30 Scrambled 08:35 Mr Bean 08:50 Horrid Henry 09:10 Nerds and Monsters 09:30 Jessie 10:05 Tom and Jerry 10:25 Murder, She Wrote 11:25 Jeremy Kyle USA 12:20 News 12:25 Jeremy Kyle 13:30 6 Nations Live Ireland v Italy 16:25 6 Nations Live - England v Wales 19:30 News 20:00 Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway Mel B interviews dogsitters in I’m a Celebrity, Get Out of Me Ear!

21:45 The National Lottery Shane Richie hosts the game show that sees couples playing to win the prizes of their dreams

Army Dad’s 21:30 Mainwaring’s platoon is sitting in a barn which is the target for some 25pounders

22:35 Casualty Lofty comes face to face with the consequences of his actions and has a lifechanging decision to make

22:00 Stag The four remaining members of the stag party realise they must make a final stand if they are to survive

22:30 The Jonathan Ross Show Guests include Glenn Close, Gillian Anderson and Marlon Wayans

23:25 News 23:45 Match of the Day 00:30 Film - The Ring (15) 02:15 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:20 News

23:00 Film - The Talented Mr Ripley (15) 01:10 Line of Duty 03:10 Film - The Salton Sea (18) 04:45 This is BBC Two

23:30 News 23:45 Film Moonraker (PG) 02:20 Jackpot247 04:00 Murder, She Wrote 04:55 ITV Nightscreen

21:30 You’re Back in the Room The hilarious game show where five strangers team up to win a potential £25,000

07:15 How I Met Your Mother 07:40 King of Queens 08:30 MSA British Rally Championship 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 The Morning Line 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 The Superhumans Show 12:30 The Simpsons 13:30 Marvel’s Agents of SHIELD 14:30 Racing: Sandown Park and Wolverhampton 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:35 News 20:00 Crufts 2016 Clare Balding hosts further coverage from the third day of the prestigious annual dog show, which this year is celebrating its 125th anniversary 22:00 Lee Evans The energetic stand-up star rails against the annoyances of modern life, in a performance recorded at the National Indoor Arena in Birmingham in 2014, taking the audience on his personal journey of modern day life with all its irritations 23:00 Film - Riddick (15) 01:20 Film - Kick-Ass (18) 03:25 Hollyoaks Omnibus 05:30 Ultimate Dealer 05:55 Selling Houses with Amanda Lamb

07:00 Milkshake 09:45 The Fairly Odd Parents 10:20 The Saturday Show Live 12:20 Police Interceptors 14:15 Pets Who Hate Vets 15:15 Psycho Pussies: When Cats Attack 16:15 90 Cats and Counting: Cat Crazies 17:15 Kitten Impossible 18:10 41 Dogs in a 3-Bed Semi 19:10 Now That’s Funny 20:10 News 20:15 World War II in Colour This episode focuses on the final days of Hitler and the Third Reich as German forces were suffocated by Russian forces from the east meeting the Allies’ advance from the west 21:10 The Gadget Show Ortis and Jon join forces to take on Amazon Prime at transport tech

12:10 Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway 13:45 The Almost Impossible Gameshow 14:40 Scorpion 15:35 Film - Nancy Drew (PG) 17:40 Catchphrase 18:45 Film Legally Blonde (12) 20:40 Film - Back to the Future Part III (PG) 23:00 The Keith Lemon Sketch Show 23:30 Family Guy 01:00 American Dad ITV3 10:50 Wycliffe 11:50 Lewis 19:55 Midsomer Murders 00:00 A Touch of Frost 02:05 Blue Murder ITV4

22:00 The Championship Matches from the Championship, including Huddersfield Town v Burnley, Rotherham v Derby County and Nottingham Forest v Sheffield Wednesday

12:45 Storage Wars 13:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 18:15 Storage Wars18:45 Storage Wars Texas 19:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 00:15 FIA Formula e Championship Live 02:15 Hell on Wheels 03:15 Motorway Patrol

23:00 Goal Rush 23:30 Law and Order: Special Victims Unit 01:15 Super Casino 04:10 Police Interceptors

09:00 The Weekend Mix, 12:00 Suzy G, 15:00 Keith Nicol

Sunday 13th March 07:45 An Island Parish 08:15 This Farming Life 09:15 Gardeners’ World 09:45 Countryfile 10:45 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:15 The Best Dishes Ever 12:45 Winter Youth Olympic Games 2016 13:15 MOTD2 Extra 14:00 Homes Under the Hammer 15:00 Escape to the Continent 16:00 Film Strictly Ballroom (PG) 17:30 Gymnastics World 20:00 Countryfile Cup 2016 19:00 Flog It Countryfile is in Aberystwyth, where Adam 20:00 Who’s the Boss?

Henson visits the town’s The boss at a Scottish craft university to meet the brewer hands over the youngsters working reins of recruitment to his towards a career in farming entire company 07:00 Breakfast 09:15 Match of the Day 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 The Big Questions 12:00 Sunday Politics 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:15 The TV That Made Me 15:00 Six Nations Rugby Union: Scotland v France 18:05 Songs of Praise 18:40 Pointless 19:30 News

21:00 Antiques Roadshow For the first time Antiques Roadshow devotes an entire episode to celebrating the art and culture of one nation, India

21:00 Steve Backshall’s Mountain Extreme Challenge The naturalist reaches the peak of one of Venezuela’s tepui mountains

22:00 The Night Manager Roper welcomes Pine into his inner circle, leaving Corky out in the cold

22:00 Let’s Play Darts for Sports Relief 2016 Gabby Logan hosts the nail-biting final

23:00 News 23:30 Match of the Day 2 00:00 Match of the Day 00:30 Film - It’s a Wonderful Afterlife (12) 02:05 Weather 02:10 News

23:00 Thirteen 00:00 The People v OJ Simpson: American Crime Story The Film 00:50 Magdalene Sisters (15)

07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:25 Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 07:45 Share a Story 07:50 Sooty 08:05 Super 4 08:15 Looped 08:30 Scrambled 08:35 Mr Bean 08:50 Horrid Henry 09:10 Nerds and Monsters 09:30 Bear Grylls Survival School 10:05 Tom and Jerry 10:25 News 10:30 FIA Formula e Championship Highlights 11:25 Jeremy Kyle 13:30 News 13:40 Jeremy Kyle 14:45 River Monsters 15:45 Big Star’s Little Star 16:45 Off Their Rockers 17:15 Film - For Your Eyes Only (PG) 19:35 News

07:15 How I Met Your Mother 07:40 King of Queens 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 George Clarke’s Amazing Spaces 14:30 Film - Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days (U) 16:20 Film - Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (PG) 18:40 News 19:00 The Secret Life of the Zoo

20:00 Crufts 2016 Highlights of the final day’s main arena events include the winner of the Friends for Life competition, the 20:00 Beowulf: Return to Flyball and International the Shieldlands Rheda Agility finals, judging of the escapes from her captors in Terrier and Hound groups and the announcement of Bregan Best in Show 2016 21:00 The Story of Cats Examining how cats went 22:00 Indian Summers from wild predators to The drama series set in 1930s colonial India domestic pets returns, picking up the story 22:00 Doctor Thorne Sir three years on from the first Roger falls seriously ill and series Dr Thorne does his best to 23:00 Film - Slumdog ease the old man’s pain Millionaire (15) 01:20 The Leg 02:20 23:00 News 23:15 Houdini Last Bodies and Doyle 00:15 Rugby Embarrassing 01:15 Jackpot247 04:00 03:15 Come Dine with Me ITV Nightscreen 05:35 Ultimate Dealer

07:00 Milkshake 10:55 The Fairly Odd Parents 11:30 The Championship 12:30 Goal Rush 13:00 Film - Zathura: A Space Adventure (PG) 15:00 Film - Big Mommas: Like Father, Like Son (PG) 17:15 Film - Flubber (U) 19:00 Now That’s Funny 20:00 Budgies Make You Laugh Out Loud Clip show featuring the best and most hilarious antics of budgies 21:00 Penn and Teller: Fool Us in Vegas Penn and Teller challenge their fellow illusionists to perform their most mystifying trick, then try to work out how it was done 21:55 News

13:55 Film - Nancy Drew (PG) 16:00 Film - The Incredible Hulk (12) 18:05 Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway 19:45 Film - Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous (12) 22:00 Ibiza Weekender 23:00 Family Guy 23:30 Bordertown 00:00 Family Guy ITV3 12:50 Wycliffe 13:55 Lewis 20:00 Midsomer Murders 22:00 Carry On Forever 23:00 Sunday Night at the Palladium 00:00 Piers Morgan’s Life Stories 01:00 Like Father Like Son ITV4

22:00 Film - Jonah Hex (15) Action adventure following a bounty hunter out for revenge against a confederate general who murdered his family

10:55 The Car Chasers 11:55 Pawn Stars 13:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 18:15 Storage Wars 19:45 Snooker: World Grand Prix Live 00:15 Film - Above the Law (18) 02:20 Ax Men

23:20 Film - Angels and Demons (12) 01:50 Tattoo Disasters: UK 02:15 Super Casino 04:10 Benefits by the Sea: Jaywick

09:00 The Weekend Mix, 12:00 Suzy G, 15:00 Tony De Love

7

Monday 14th March

8 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 15:45 The Queen’s 90th Birthday: A Service of Celebration for Commonwealth Day 17:15 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Fake Britain Matt Allwright presents the consumer rights show that investigates the conmen trying to get their hands on people’s money 21:00 EastEnders Ronnie is forced to answer some questions 21:30 Panorama Alison Holt talks to a neuropathologist at the centre of a fight about diagnoses of shaken baby syndrome, and meets convicted parents who continue to protest their innocence 22:00 Behind Closed Doors Documentary shot over 12 months showing the work of Thames Valley Police’s domestic abuse teams 23:00 News 23:45 Cuckoo 00:15 Have I Got Old News for You 00:45 Live at the Apollo 01:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:35 News

07:15 Heir Hunters 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Claimed and Shamed 09:15 Emergency Rescue Down Under 09:45 Mary Berry’s Foolproof Cooking 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 Coast 14:15 Who Do You Think You Are? 15:15 WPC 56 16:00 The Doctor Blake Mysteries 16:55 Mountain 17:55 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 18:25 Bargain Hunt 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Too Much TV 20:00 This Farming Life The early winter is a time of year that brings new life on the farms and Martin’s sheds are full of pregnant cows 21:00 University Challenge Quiz 21:30 Only Connect Sport Relief Special Quiz 22:00 The People v OJ Simpson: American Crime Story The prosecution team’s earnest and steadfast reliance on evidence is no match for Johnnie Cochran’s tactics and mind games 22:50 QI XL 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Steve Backshall’s Extreme Mountain Challenge 01:15 La Traviata: Love, Death and Divas 02:15 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 03:15 Kipling’s Indian Adventure

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Jeremy Kyle’s Emergency Room 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Charity drops a bombshell 20:30 Coronation Street Anna is horrified to see Eileen with Phelan 21:00 Further Tales from Northumberland with Robson Green Off the coast of Blyth, Robson is shown the ropes on board a 100-year-old tall ship 21:30 Coronation Street Will Eileen fall for Pat’s lies?

22:00 Davina Mccall: Life at the Extreme Davina travels to the Norwegian archipelago of Svalbard in the Arctic Circle, a harsh environment set across 15 million sq km of sea ice where temperatures can drop to -40C. She learns how huskies’ thick fur is better insulation than goose down and that the deep pads on their paws protect them from the cold 23:00 News 23:45 The Agenda 00:25 The Jonathan Ross Show 01:20 Jackpot247 04:00 Jeremy Kyle 04:55 ITV Nightscreen

07:00 Countdown 07:45 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Frasier 11:00 Car SOS 12:00 Shipping Wars 13:00 News 13:05 A Place in the Sun: Winter Sun 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 A New Life in the Sun 18:00 Couples Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:15 Cowboy Builders 13:10 News 13:15 The Dog Rescuers with Alan Davies 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS: New Orleans 16:15 Film - A Mother Betrayed 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News

21:00 Dispatches Antony Barnett reveals that while many landlords provide good homes, there are some exploiting the benefit system to make millions from supplying poor accommodation, often putting lives at risk

20:00 Weather Terror Accounts of Brits caught in perilous weather abroad, including two pensioners who were stranded in an open lifeboat for five hours on the Southern Ocean

21:30 Food Unwrapped Jimmy investigates reports that there could be a wasp inside your fresh fig: is it just a myth or could there be any truth in it?

22:00 Royal Navy School An exhausting 20km trek across Dartmoor leaves one recruit seriously ill 23:00 Fresh Meat 23:50 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 00:55 24 Hours in A and E 01:50 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 02:45 The Secret Millionaire 03:40 Ultimate Dealer 04:10 Location, Location, Location 05:05 Selling Houses with Amanda Lamb

21:00 Police Interceptors Andy has a high-speed chase through a housing estate and Kev pays an early-morning visit to a drug dealer 22:00 The X Files As a mysterious and fatal pandemic sweeps across the USA and other parts of the globe, Scully desperately tries to find a cure using her own altered DNA 23:00 Gotham 23:55 NCIS 01:45 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 Super Casino 04:10 A and E: When Patients Attack 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor

DON´T MISS

On This Day

THE X-FILES

CHANNEL 5 22:00

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Ross is shocked to learn that Charity is blackmailing Emma over hiding Noah.

When Ross confronts Charity, he realises she has him over a barrel too when she tells him that she knows he shot Robert.

Meanwhile, Leyla is taken aback when Megan asks

The investigations that Mulder and Scully previously began with conspiracy theorist and web-TV show host Tad O’Malley seem to have awakened powerful enemies. A widespread panic begins as a mysterious and fatal pandemic sweeps across America and Scully desperately tries to find a cure using her own altered DNA. Meanwhile, Mulder confronts the man whom he believes to be behind it all, but another figure from the duo’s past may prove to be the key to their salvation. Starring Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny. Last in the series.

to be partners in the business again. Elsewhere, Chrissie struggles to hide her growing attraction towards Andy.

In Coronation Street, Phelan calls in the cab office and apologises to Eileen if he came on too strong last week. Enjoying the flattery, Eileen suggests lunch in the Bistro.

When Anna spots Eileen and Phelan enjoying the intimate lunch, she’s horrified. Izzy urges her to

warn Eileen about what he’s capable of. Eileen takes Pat back to Number 11 and her phone rings while she makes coffee.

Seeing the caller is Anna, Pat kills the call. Pat then confides in Eileen that if they’re to have any chance of a successful relationship, then there’s something he needs to tell her about Anna...

Meanwhile, when Gemma rolls in late and shows more interest in gossiping than work, Kylie puts pressure on David to fire her.

As Gemma makes out to Rita that she’s in contact with Callum, Rita urges her to go to the police.

David’s had enough and

1991: Birmingham six freed after 16 years in prison sacks Gemma, telling her that she’s not cut out for hairdressing. How will Gemma react when she discovers that it was Kylie’s idea to get rid of her?

In the second episode, Phelan spins Eileen a false story, making out that Anna used to fancy him and they had a one night stand which he immediately regretted.

Having swallowed Phelan’s lies, Eileen thanks him for being honest with her. Later, Anna calls at Number 11 and tells Eileen the truth about Phelan and how he forced her to have sex. Eileen is disbelieving. As Anna

heads home deflated, Phelan approaches and gives her an evil smile, telling her that he got to Eileen first and he intends to stick around.

Meanwhile, when some youths give Chesney a hard time in the kebab shop, Gemma comes to his rescue. Chesney is grateful and promises to talk to Dev about giving her a job.

In Eastenders, Linda and Mick have a heart-to-heart with Nancy and learn that she is feeling lost in life.

Linda encourages her to think hard about what she wants and grab it.

Later, as the Carters cele-

07:00 Planet’s Funniest Animals 07:20 Dinner Date 08:10 Ellen DeGeneres 09:00 Emmerdale 09:30 Coronation Street 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Dinner Date 12:15 Royal Pains 13:10 Emmerdale 13:45 Coronation Street 14:45 Ellen DeGeneres 15:40 Judge Rinder 16:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:50 Take Me Out 20:00 You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Family Guy 22:30 Bordertown 23:00 Family Guy 23:30 American Dad 00:30 The Cleveland Show 01:30 Two and a Half Men ITV3 07:00 Doctor in the House 07:25 Heartbeat 08:25 Where the Heart is 09:30 The Royal 10:35 Judge Judy 11:55 Noah’s Ark 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 The Royal 16:05 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor in the House 17:50 In Loving Memory 18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Lewis 23:00 Corrie: The Road to Coronation Street 00:40 Noah’s Ark 01:45 Where the Heart is 02:40 Judge Judy ITV4 07:00 Hogan’s Heroes 07:55 The Chase 08:45 The Professionals 09:40 The Sweeney 10:50 Ax Men 11:45 The Chase 12:50 The Professionals 13:50 Storage Wars 14:50 The Car Chasers 15:50 Hogan’s Heroes 16:55 The Sweeney 17:55 The Professionals 19:00 Storage Wars Texas 20:00 Rugby Highlights 21:00 Ax Men 22:00 Film - The Game of Death 00:05 Bundesliga 01:05 Rugby Highlights 02:05 Film Village of the Damned (15)

07:00 Peter Hurst, 10:00 Trev Massey, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Gordon Lack 19:00 Andy James brate being back together as a family, a terrified Linda is shocked to find Ollie not moving in his cot.

Meanwhile, Ronnie finds Phil destroying the kitchen at home. She loses patience and gives Phil a reality check, but she is stunned when he breaks down and admits that he doesn’t want to die.

Later, someone lays an unnerving wreath outside Ronnie’s front door saying: “RIP Ronnie Mitchell.”

Tuesday 15th March 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC National and Local News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 WPC 56 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 The TV That Made Me 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC National and Local News and Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders Tragedy strikes for the Carters 21:00 Holby City Bernie is forced to question what she really wants when her future at Holby is put in doubt. Ollie and Zosia’s world is blown apart when a former flame of Ollie’s turns up on Darwin. With the help of Morven, Cara realises it’s always better the devil you know 22:00 Happy Valley Catherine confronts a delusional Frances, while John’s torment leads him to desperate measures 23:00 BBC National and Local News and Weather 23:45 The Estate We’re in 00:45 Shop Well for Less 01:45 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:50 News

07:15 Heir Hunters 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Caught Red Handed 09:15 Emergency Rescue Down Under 09:45 Great British Railway Journeys 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 The Super League Show 14:45 Coast 15:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 16:00 The Doctor Blake Mysteries 16:55 Mountain 17:55 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 18:25 Bargain Hunt 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Too Much TV 20:00 This Farming Life Cameras follow the drama in Argyll where the weather takes a turn for the worse 21:00 Mary Berry’s Easter Feast Mary shares her favourite Easter recipes 22:00 Inside Obama’s White House: 100 Days The story of how Obama tried to reshape America 23:00 Scrappers 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Miss Transgender: Britain’s New Beauty Queens 01:15 Let’s Play Darts for Sports Relief 2016 02:15 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 03:15 Back in Time for the Weekend 04:15 Cats v Dogs: Which is Best? 05:15 This is BBC Two

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Jeremy Kyle’s Emergency Room 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Charity has an offer for Ross 20:30 The Inspectors are Coming The inspectors in Cleethorpes find themselves caught up in a neighbourhood dispute between a tattoo parlour and a chip shop 21:00 It’s Not Rocket Science Rachel meets the extraordinary British team who are trying to create the first car to travel at 1,000mph 22:00 Speeding Wars Some members of the public have taken speeding matters into their own hands. In Derbyshire, Kevin Harris has set up his own Speed Watch group.

Meanwhile, speeding drag racer Perry Antoniou hires a specialist motoring solicitor rather than take the three penalty points 23:00 News 23:40 Rugby Highlights 00:40 Davina Mccall: Life at the Extreme 01:35 Jackpot247 04:00 Loose Women 04:50 ITV Nightscreen

9 07:00 Countdown 07:45 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Car SOS 12:00 Shipping Wars 13:00 News 13:05 Food Unwrapped 13:35 Racing: Cheltenham Festival 17:30 Three in a Bed 18:00 Couples Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News 21:00 Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners A new run of the show that matches people who can’t stop cleaning with those in dire need of a tidy. Louise Andrews is obsessed with cleanliness, so she visits Paula to take on her chaotic home 22:00 First Dates Maître d’ Fred and his team return for a new series, opening the doors of the First Dates restaurant to more hopeful singletons from all over the country 23:00 Gogglebox 00:05 Very British Problems 01:10 Poker Stars and Monte-Carlo Casino Ept Grand Final 02:10 Cheltenham Festival Highlights 02:50 KOTV Boxing Weekly 03:15 Gillette World Sport 03:45 MSA British Rally Championship 04:10 The Superhumans Show 04:40 Ultimate Dealer

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:15 Cowboy Builders 13:10 News 13:15 Nightmare Tenants, Slum Landlords 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Film - After All These Years 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 Police Interceptors Andy has a high-speed chase through a housing estate and Kev pays an early-morning visit to a drug dealer 21:00 Britain’s Horror Homes Tales of property nightmares, including a South London house overrun by maggots, and in West Sussex a woman’s loft conversion is left unfinished 22:00 Benefits by the Sea: Jaywick Darren intends to ask Tara to marry him, but she is already married. Fred wants to reunite with his ex-wife, but she refuses to see him 23:00 The Best of Bad TV 00:00 Penn and Teller: Fool Us in Vegas 00:55 On Benefits and Proud 01:50 Tattoo Disasters: UK 02:15 Super Casino 04:10 GPs: Behind Closed Doors 05:00 Wildlife SOS

DON´T MISS

HAPPY VALLEY

BBC1 22:00

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Ross is left panicking when Charity demands the £50,000 by 5pm. He heads into town and goes to a jeweller shop dressed in a disguise.

When Moira mentions to Charity that Ross has gone on a job and taken Moses with him too, Charity goes along to join

Catherine and Shaf call in at Far Sunderland farm to visit Alison and Daryl, but discover a scene of carnage when they enter the building, with Alison slumped on the dining table covered in blood having taken an overdose.

Meanwhile, Andy and Jodie begin to suspect that the person who killed Vicky Fleming could be someone on the team and as the investigation heads towards a conclusion, John’s torment increases, leading him to take drastic measures to avoid the consequences of his actions.

Last in the series.

him at the jewellers. She arrives just as Ross is walking out, but has his plan worked or could she prove useful to him at a crucial point?

Meanwhile, Chrissie heads to see her solicitor to finalise her divorce from Robert. Enjoying spending time with Andy, Chrissie fakes hurting her ankle.

Andy picks her up but it soon becomes clear that Chrissie isn’t hurt and she cheekily trips Andy up before racing off to the house. Andy catches up with her and she pulls him in for a passionate kiss.

Elsewhere, Leyla reluctantly agrees to let Megan

back into business when she sees how much she’s struggling.

In Eastenders, The Carters panic when they realise that Ollie isn’t breathing. Linda manages to revive him, but the situation takes another serious turn when he suffers a seizure. Once they’re at the hospital, the Carters are asked about Ollie’s health over the last few days and they start to won-

07:00 Planet’s Funniest Animals 07:20 Dinner Date 08:10 Ellen DeGeneres 09:00 Emmerdale 09:30 Coronation Street 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Dinner Date 12:15 Royal Pains 13:10 Emmerdale 13:45 Coronation Street 14:45 Ellen DeGeneres 15:40 Judge Rinder 16:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:50 Take Me Out 20:00 You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Film - Run, Fat Boy, Run (12) 00:05 Family Guy 01:05 American Dad 02:00 Two and a Half Men 02:25 Ibiza Weekender ITV3 07:00 Doctor in the House 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Where the Heart is 09:30 The Royal 10:35 Judge Judy 11:55 Noah’s Ark 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 The Royal 16:05 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor in the House 17:50 In Loving Memory 18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 A Touch of Frost 01:05 Noah’s Ark 02:10 Where the Heart is ITV4 07:00 Hogan’s Heroes 07:55 The Chase 08:50 The Professionals 09:50 The Sweeney 10:50 Ax Men 11:50 The Chase 12:50 The Professionals 13:55 Storage Wars 14:50 The Car Chasers 15:50 Hogan’s Heroes 16:55 The Sweeney 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Car Chasers 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 The Chase: Celebrity Special 22:00 Film - Die Another Day (12) 00:40 Film - Born to Raise Hell (18) 02:45 The Sweeney

07:00 Peter Hurst, 10:00 Trev Massey, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Gordon Lack der if his recent fall could have something to do with it.

Later, the family’s worst fears are confirmed when a CT scan reveals that Ollie is suffering from bleeding in the brain, which is likely to have been caused by a severe blow to the head. Mick is quick to blame Nancy and Lee, but Linda reminds him that she’s the one who said Ollie was fine.

The reality of the situation hits home when the doctor reveals that Children’s Services will have to be called, and things get even worse when it’s revealed that Ollie could have brain

damage.

Meanwhile, Phil falls quickly back into his old ways and even denies telling Ronnie that he needs help and doesn’t want to die. Ronnie remains persistent by giving him a support group leaflet for alcoholics. With so much going on, the creepy ‘RIP Ronnie Mitchell’ wreath goes unnoticed…

In Holby City, Bernie is forced to re-evaluate her doctoring ways when a patient makes a formal complaint against her. Can she change her army ways and adapt to Holby life before it’s too late?

Ollie fights to save his relationship with Zosia when a former flame reappears in his life as a patient on Darwin. Can he do right by both women or will he lose Zosia in the process?

Cara wants to keep her personal and professional lives separate when it comes to her living arrangements but soon realises the errors of her ways.

10

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 18 represents M and 20 represents Q, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 By way of (3) 3 Confess (5) 6 Peaked hat (3) 8 Innate (7) 9 Mournful song (5) 10 Blockade (5) 11 Going on foot (7) 12 Half-asleep (6) 14 Brief trip (6) 17 City in southern Spain (7) 19 Reddish brown (5) 21 Slow speech pattern (5) 22 Get rid of (7) 23 Timid (3) 24 Avoid (5) 25 Failure (3)

Down 1 Planet (5) 2 Style of design popular in the 1920s and 1930s (3,4) 3 Concur (5) 4 African country (6) 5 Young child (7) 6 Welsh breed of dog (5) 7 Promised (7) 12 Deciphers (7) 13 Ruined (7) 15 Practical (7) 16 Risk (6) 18 Prepared (5) 19 Range (5) 20 Small bug (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Cheap, 4 Uses, 9 Arrange, 10 Eject, 11 Rue, 12 Egypt, 14 Patio, 15 Axial, 16 Fail, 18 Easy, 20 Kiwis, 22 Osaka, 23 Swede, 25 Tie, 26 Sushi, 27 Ensnare, 29 Shed, 30 Dregs. Down: 1 Chapel, 2 Early, 3 Pan, 5 Sleepless, 6 Sleuths, 7 Ferris wheel, 8 Stoop, 13 Talkative, 17 Amasses, 19 Boast, 21 Defers, 24 Evade, 28 Sad.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES raw edge in hard wood (5) Across 28 Sailors at American 1 Peer so aroused to state birthplace of Saint Paul (6) of quiet restfulness (6) Down 4 Misquote for headgear 1 Throw away badly written (5) Crete journal (6) 8 Actor David as the leader 2 Man of letters who calls of Argonauts (5) regularly (7) 9 Admire Isolde, I find (7) 3 Sea god in accommoda10 New campaign, not one tion in California (3,5) for staying outdoors (7) 4 Strode in during introduc11 A pair in a Tokyo kebab tion (4) shop (4) 5 Go round capital (5) 12 May cooked sweet pota6 View allowed through to (3) this? (6) 14 Firearms being 7 Miserly cocktail of my gin returned, we are feeling (5) very cosy and secure (4) 13 A man at the cash regis15 ‘Morning Britain’, cry ter with a Spanish scarf (8) from pulpit (4) 16 Joins brides with 18 Go after sheltered fool grooms’ capital (7) (3) 17 Backbone by Tory 21 Blow pipe you hear very leader - it’s played on (6) loud (4) 19 French Apostle has a 23 Light metal ignited him stroke of luck (5) outside the university (7) 20 Compensation for a 25 Beat writer first with an thousand goals (6) old club (7) 22 Make-up brief work out 26 Rocking stone along for (5) a change (5) 24 Single out the digging 27 Minor modification to tool (4) 28 Ankle bones, collectively STANDARD CLUES (6) Across Down 1 Lie comfortably (6) 1 Discard (6) 4 Chef’s hat (5) 2 Person who delivers the 8 Mythical Greek hero (5) mail (7) 9 Hero-worship (7) 3 California port (3,5) 10 Holidaying in a tent (7) 4 Walk over (4) 11 Harness for oxen (4) 5 Capital of Ecuador (5) 12 Edible tuber (3) 6 Embroidered hole (6) 14 Fitting closely but com7 Miserly (5) fortably (4) 13 Spanish scarf (8) 15 Early pulpit (4) 16 River crossings (7) 18 Loutish fellow (3) 17 Short upright piano (6) 21 Breathe heavily (4) 23 Soft, silver-white, light 19 Stroke of luck (5) 20 Corrects (6) metal (7) 22 Threadlike structure (5) 25 Nine iron (7) 24 Choose (4) 26 Rocking stone (5) 27 Adjust finely (5) Last weeks Solution Across:7 Regime, 8 Alison, 9 Bali, 10 Clincher, 11 Destine, 13 House, 15 Latex, 17 Pale ale, 20 Catch out, 21 Aery, 22 Miners, 23 Agaric.

Down: 1 Beware, 2 Kiwi, 3 De-icing, 4 Tacit, 5 Disclose, 6 Loners, 12 Trencher, 14 Partial, 16 Arabic, 18 Larkin, 19 Holst, 21 Alas.

Wordsearch

The aim of our Word Search puzzle is to find all the 33 words listed below hidden within the puzzle.

Aero

Drifter

Mars Bar

Toffifee

Boost

Flake

Milka

Topic

Bounty

Fudge

Milky Bar

Twirl

Bournville

Galaxy

Milky Way

Twix

Breakaway

Kinder

Penguin

Wispa

Picnic

Wonka Bar Yorkie

Crunchie

Bueno

Curly Wurly

KitKat

Time Out

Dairy Milk

Lion Bar

Toblerone

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Body (of person, animal) (6) 4 Shell (of snail, shellfish) (6) 8 Sobrina (5) 10 North (side, part) (5) 11 Nine (5) 12 Leones (5) 13 Noise (5) 14 Behind (at the back) (5) 17 Toad (4) 19 Pan de molde (4) 21 Granos (en la piel) (5) 24 Toll (on road, bridge) (5) 25 Wide (street, river, trousers) (5) 27 Otra vez (5) 28 Equipos (deporte) (5) 29 Tumba (5) 30 Cucharas (para comer)

(6) 31 Fiebres (6) Down 1 Velas (de cera) (7) 2 January (5) 3 Press (newspapers) (6) 5 Dueños (de casas, coches, perros) (6) 6 Trolley (supemarket) (7) 7 Fir tree (5) 9 To read (4) 15 Grifo (de agua) (3) 16 Hormiga (3) 18 Banana (7) 20 Flores (7) 21 Estación (parte del año) (6) 22 To pray (say prayers) (4) 23 Blood (6) 24 Ducks (birds) (5) 26 Lesson (5)

11 Across 1 Personification of England or the typical Englishman, represented as a stout red-faced farmer in a top hat and high boots (4,4) 5 Went out of business (6) 10 Single thickness of usually some homogeneous substance (5) 11 Drug prepared from the dried leaves of foxgloves and containing substances that stimulate the heart muscle (9) 12 Large rodent with defensive spines or quills on the body and tail (9) 13 Exhibition or contest in which cowboys show their skill at riding broncos, roping calves, wrestling steers, etc (5) 14 Capital and largest city of Zimbabwe (6) 15 Non-metallic element (symbol Si), forming grey crystals or brown amorphous powder and having

semiconducting properties (7) 18 Hinged surface in the trailing edge of an aeroplane wing, used to control the roll of an aircraft about its longitudinal axis (7) 20 In support of (6) 22 Country house or cottage in Russia, typically used as a second or holiday home (5) 24 Vast plain in Tanzania to the west of the Great Rift Valley known for its wildlife (9) 25 Kind of gelatin obtained from fish, especially sturgeon, and used in making jellies, glue, etc. and for fining real ale (9) 26 Realistic Norwegian author who wrote plays on social and political themes, such as The Master Builder (1892), Peer Gynt (1867) and A Doll's House (1879): Henrik ----- (5) 27 1953 musical that features the songs: Baubles,

SUDOKU (Easy)

Quiz Word

Bangles and Beads, Stranger in Paradise and And This Is My Beloved (6) 28 Person who associ-

ates with another person or a group in a sycophantic manner or for the purpose of gaining some personal

advantage (6-2) Down 1 Old car in a dilapidated condition (6) 2 Norwegian anthropologist noted for his ocean voyages in primitive craft to demonstrate his theories of cultural diffusion, the best known of which was that of the balsa raft Kon-Tiki from Peru to the islands east of Tahiti in 1947: Thor --------(9) 3 Area of the western Atlantic Ocean where a large number of ships and aircraft are said to have mysteriously disappeared (7,8) 4 Member of any of the bands of English workers who destroyed machinery, especially in cotton and woollen mills, which they believed was threatening their jobs (1811-16) (7) 6 Solving of problems by an indirect and creative approach, typically through

viewing the problem in a new and unusual light (7,8) 7 Cold dish of various mixtures of raw or cooked vegetables, usually seasoned with oil, vinegar or other dressing (5) 8 Reduction in the selling price of something (8) 9 Metal or plastic tubes fixed round each end of shoelaces (6) 16 Son of Ethelred the Unready, king of England 1042-66, famed for his piety: Edward the --------- (9) 17 Comic character in the television series Blackadder, played by actor Tony Robinson (8) 19 Capital of the Bahamas (6) 20 Person who makes and serves coffee in a coffee bar (7) 21 Haddock usually baked but sometimes broiled with lots of butter (6) 23 Strips of potato fried in deep fat (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH INFORMÁTICA-COMPUTING Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

archivo

enviar

arrastrar

firma digital

arroba

navegador

barra

negrita

carpeta

pegar

contraseña

ratón

correo cifrado

red

descargar

teclado

science QUIZ

ANSEWRS 1. Gypsy Moth 2. K2 3. Bats 4. An American Chemist Named William H Carothers 5. A Spider 6. The Atom Bomb 7. Breech Birth 8. Hay Fever 9. An Otter 10. Bulimia 11. apple 12. Alexander Fleming 13. Gary Kasparov (Chess) 14. He Invented Cats Eyes

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1 October, 5 Die Hard, 9 Tarantula, 10 Beano, 11 Penne, 12 Elsewhere, 13 Shadows, 15 Antique, 17 Pacific, 19 Marceau, 21 Acropolis, 23 Sofia, 25 Blini, 26 Terrified, 27 Yangtze, 28 Tweeted. Down: 1 Octopus, 2 Turin, 3 Bunked off, 4 Reuters, 5 Dead Sea, 6 Elbow, 7 Arabesque, 8 Diocese, 14 Accordion, 16 Turnstile, 17 Playboy, 18 Colette, 19 Muskrat, 20 Unaided, 22 Paint, 24 Feint.

dos puntos Empareja estas palabras - Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.archivo, 2.arrastrar, 3.arroba,

14.pegar, 15.ratón, 16.red,

i.to send, j.folder, k.to paste,

4.barra, 5.carpeta,

17.teclado.

l.browser, m.to drag, n.mouse,

6.contraseña, 7.correo cifrado,

o.to download, p.at@,

8.descargar, 9.dos puntos,

a.bold, b.password, c.network,

10.enviar, 11.firma digital,

d.slash, e.file, f.colon,

12.Navegador, 13.negrita,

g.keyboard, h.digital signature,

Soduko

Span - Eng

Quizword

q.encrypted mail.

Answers: 1e, 2m, 3p, 4d, 5j, 6b, 7g, 8o, 9f, 10i, 11h, 12l, 13a, 14k, 15n, 16c, 17g.

1. What animal can smell a virgin of the same type of animal from 1.8 miles away?

2. Chogori is better know by what boring name?

3. In the wild, which animal pollinates banana plants?

4. Who Invented Nylon?

5. What Frightened Miss Muffet Away?

6. Secret Research Into What Was Nicknamed The Manhattan Project?

7. What Do You Call A Birth Where A Baby's Feet Are Delivered First?

8. What Is The More Common Name For Allergic Rhinitus?

9. What Sort Of Animal Was Tarka?

10. What Disorder Results In Compulsive Eating And Induced Vomiting?

11. which fruit has the latin name of malus oumila?

12. Who discovered Penicillian in 1928?

13. Which world champion was beaten by a machine called Deep Blue in 1997?

14. What did Englishman Percy Shaw contribute to road safety in 1934?

Word Search

12

Wednesday 16th March

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 WPC 56 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 The TV That Made Me 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show

07:15 Heir Hunters 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Caught Red Handed 09:15 Emergency Rescue Down Under 09:45 Great British Menu 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 12:30 The Budget 16:45 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones 17:45 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 18:15 Bargain Hunt 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Too Much TV

21:00 Shop Well for Less The One Show presenter Alex Jones and business journalist Steph McGovern head to Hertfordshire to meet the Garretts, a family who love to shop as a way of spending time together.

Rob, Jenny and Leah Garrett would love to visit Disneyland, but their shopping habits mean they cannot save enough money for the trip

20:00 This Farming Life Sandy is surveying the damage to his croft after one of the worst storms on record

22:00 Famous, Rich and Homeless The Sport Relief volunteers must deal with day-to-day survival on the streets and the reality of peoples’ lives unravelling in front of them 23:00 News 23:45 The Richard Dimbleby Lecture 2016 00:30 Pompeii: New Secrets Revealed with Mary Beard 01:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:35 News

21:00 Horizon The story of how a Russian is turning to cutting-edge science to try to unlock the secret of living forever 22:00 My Family at War Brendan O’Carroll tells the story of the Irish Easter Rising when 1,600 Irish rebels took over the centre of Dublin 23:00 Live From the BBC 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Inside Obama’s White House: 100 Days 01:15 Land of Hope and Glory British Country Life 02:15 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 03:15 The Great Sport Relief Bake Off 04:15 Nature’s Miracle Orphans 05:15 My Baby, Psychosis and Me

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:15 The Chancellor’s Budget: An ITV News Special 15:00 Jeremy Kyle’s Emergency Room 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Aaron faces Gordon in court 20:30 Coronation Street Sarah is rocked by a pregnancy scare 21:00 Big Star’s Little Star Family secrets are revealed when actress Kym Marsh is joined by her daughter Polly. Also appearing are politician Vince Cable with his grandson Charlie, and reality star Elliott Wright with his daughter Olivia.

Which Little Star will reveal more than they should?

22:00 Grantchester A young man sat alone in the church and covered in blood confesses to Sidney and Geordie that he attacked and killed his landlord. However, when the pair investigate further, they find the alleged victim alive and well with his family 23:00 News 23:45 UEFA Champions League Highlights 00:50 Bear Grylls: Mission Survive 01:45 Jackpot247 04:00 ITV Nightscreen

07:20 How I Met Your Mother 07:45 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Car SOS 12:00 Shipping Wars 13:00 News 13:05 Food Unwrapped 13:35 Racing: Cheltenham Festival 17:30 Three in a Bed 18:00 Couples Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:15 Cowboy Builders 13:10 News 13:15 Trauma Doctors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS: Los Angeles 16:15 Damaged 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News

20:00 The Nightmare Neighbour Next Door Shocking stories of neighbourhood disputes include 21:00 Scruffts: Britain’s an ex-paratrooper attacked Favourite Dog with a knife outside his Documentary celebrating home dogs and their handlers, as GPs: Behind Crufts open their famous 21:00 competition to crossbreeds Closed Doors Dr Sian Morris treats a number of in the Scruffts contest patients who are wracked 22:00 24 Hours in A and E with worry and anxiety, including tearful gymGerry is rushed to A&E with bunny Cherie who is terria dangerously high heart fied that her heart palpitarate of over 250bpm, and tions are a warning that doctors suspect an under- she is about to suffer a lying chest infection is the heart attack cause 22:00 Nightmare Tenants, Landlords In 23:00 Raised by Wolves Slum 23:35 How to Get a Manchester a mother looks to housing charity Shelter Council House 00:35 My for help when she believes Big Fat Asian Wedding the property she is renting 01:35 Live From Abbey is making her kids ill Road Classics 02:05 Cheltenham Festival 23:00 Person of Interest Highlights 02:50 The 00:55 Law and Order: Trainer and the Racehorse: Special Victims Unit 01:45 The Legend of Frankel True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 Super Casino 03:45 Film - Comanche 04:10 Trauma Doctors Station (15) 05:05 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Location, Location, Divine Designs 05:45 Location House Doctor

DON´T MISS

On This Day

HORIZON Investigating the story of how a Russian internet millionaire, Dmitry Itskov, is turning to cutting edge science to try to unlock the secret of living forever. The programme investigates the real science

07:00 Planet’s Funniest Animals 07:20 Dinner Date 08:10 Ellen DeGeneres 09:00 Emmerdale 09:30 The Guide to You’ve Been Framed 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Dinner Date 12:15 Royal Pains 13:10 Emmerdale 13:45 You’ve Been Framed 14:45 Ellen DeGeneres 15:40 Judge Rinder 16:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:50 Take Me Out 20:00 You’ve Been Framed and Famous 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Film - The Fast and the Furious (15) 00:10 Family Guy 01:10 American Dad ITV3 07:00 Doctor in the House 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Where the Heart is 09:35 The Royal 10:35 Judge Judy 11:55 Noah’s Ark 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:05 Heartbeat 15:05 The Royal 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:20 Doctor in the House 17:55 In Loving Memory 18:25 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Rosemary and Thyme 22:00 Love Your Garden 23:00 A Touch of Frost 01:15 Wire in the Blood ITV4 07:00 Hogan’s Heroes 07:50 The Chase 08:50 The Professionals 09:55 The Sweeney 10:55 Ax Men 11:55 The Chase 12:55 The Professionals 14:00 Pawn Stars 14:55 The Car Chasers 15:55 Hogan’s Heroes 17:00 The Sweeney 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Car Chasers 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 World Superbike Highlights 22:00 Film - US Marshals (15) 00:40 Film - The Game of Death 02:35 The Sweeney

inspiring his bold plan to upload the human mind to a computer, and examines whether his goal of bringing about immortality for humans within thirty years

BBC2 21:00 SOAPS

is attainable.

that Gordon has an alibi and couldn’t have defaced Aaron’s car.

As a hidden figure watches on from the shadows, it’s clear that someone else has a score to settle but who?

In Emmerdale, Aaron is unable to hide his happiness when Robert turns up to support him in court, but he receives a nasty surprise when he sees Gordon behaving like he’s seriously ill for the court’s benefit - even pretending to collapse. Could this help his case Later, DS Wise tells Chas

Also today, Andy tells Chrissie that he likes her a lot, but it’s going to get messy and she doesn’t need it.

Finally, Laurel tells Doug that she doesn’t want him at the wedding.

Meanwhile, Cain receives worrying news when PC Swirling places the garage truck near the jewellers that was robbed yesterday. He later questions Charity about the robbery.

Elsewhere, after being paid by Ross, Charity gives Doug some cash telling him to consider it as a first instalment for the pub.

In Coronation Street, Sarah admits to Kylie that she hasn’t felt the baby move all day and she’s scared that she’s lost him.

1976: Prime Minister Harold Wilson resigns Kylie insists they head straight to the hospital.

When the midwife examines Sarah, will they be able to locate the baby’s heartbeat?

Meanwhile, Phelan calls in the café and suggests to Anna that they should bury the hatchet and move on. Disgusted, Anna confides in Izzy about how Phelan fed Eileen a pack of lies, making out they had an affair and painting himself as the victim.

Izzy is appalled and calls in the cab office, imploring Eileen to heed Anna’s warning about Phelan.

Despite Izzy’s intervention, Eileen remains unconvinced and she’s delighted when Phelan finds her in The Rovers and offers to buy her a drink. Eileen later invites Phelan back to Number 11 where they kiss passionately.

Elsewhere, with the voting in full swing, Sally drags Tim out for a final day’s canvassing.

Also today, Dev interviews Gemma. At Chesney’s suggestion, she panders to his ego and manages to get the job.

David is taken aback to see Gemma working in

07:00 Peter Hurst, 10:00 Trev Massey, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Gordon Lack 19:00 Andy James the kebab shop and warns Chesney that he’s making a big mistake.

Finally, Aidan calls at the O’Driscolls’ to talk business with Richie but clocks Julia behaving suspiciously and notices that one of the bedroom doors is bolted from the outside, while Rana announces to the Nazirs that she and Zeedan are now a couple.

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Thursday 17th March 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Countryside 999 12:45 Caught Red Handed 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 WPC 56 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 The TV That Made Me 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders The Carter family realise their lives may never be the same 21:00 Room 101 Frank Skinner hosts a special addition featuring the best bits from the series and loads of brilliant stuff which you haven’t seen before 21:30 EastEnders One resident makes a tough decision about their future 22:00 Jo Brand’s Hell of a Walk for Sport Relief Back in January, Jo Brand embarked on a seven-day challenge to walk 135 from east to west across the country - and cameras followed her every step of the way 23:00 News 23:45 Question Time 00:45 This Week 01:30 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:35 News

07:15 Heir Hunters 08:00 Countryside 999 08:45 Caught Red Handed 09:15 The Great Interior Design Challenge 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 The Chef’s Protege 14:30 Portillo’s State Secrets 15:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 16:00 The Doctor Blake Mysteries 16:55 Britain’s Lost Routes with Griff Rhys Jones 17:50 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 18:20 Bargain Hunt 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Too Much TV 20:00 Big Dreams Small Spaces Monty helps neighbours, who want to combine the front gardens of their semi-detached homes 21:00 The Secret History of My Family The true story of two Victorian mothers brought together by domestic violence 22:00 Murder Drama series with each episode picking apart a murder in all its terrible complexity 23:00 Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 My Family at War 01:15 Britain’s Tudor Treasure: A Night at Hampton Court 02:15 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 03:15 Panorama 03:45 Let’s Play Darts for Sports Relief 2016 04:45 How to Die: Simon’s Choice

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Jeremy Kyle’s Emergency Room 16:00 Dickinson’s Real Deal 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Liv causes trouble for Aaron 20:30 Tonight Jonathan Maitland investigates just how much is too much when it comes to drink 21:00 Emmerdale Doug cannot hide his true feelings 21:30 The Cruise It is turnaround day and the crew have to help 3,300 guests check out with their 10,000 pieces of luggage, and welcome the new batch with only a few hours to clean and prepare 1,800 passenger rooms 22:00 Bear Grylls: Mission Survive The five remaining celebrities are deep in the heart of the African bush, and with rations running low, Bear challenges them to choose from a selection of edible flora 23:00 News 23:40 UEFA Europa League Highlights 00:55 Speeding Wars 01:45 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen

07:20 How I Met Your Mother 07:45 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Car SOS 12:00 Shipping Wars 13:00 News 13:05 Food Unwrapped 13:35 Racing: Cheltenham Festival 17:30 Three in a Bed 18:00 Couples Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News 21:00 Ugly House to Lovely House with George Clarke Tammy and Stuart live in a pretty village in West Sussex but their bungalow is outdated, with its main living rooms starved of light. The couple are desperate to create a family home but their options are severely limited 22:00 Speed with Guy Martin Ahead of the new Formula 1 season on Channel 4 this weekend, Guy Martin goes head to head with racing legend David Coulthard in the ultimate test of bike against car 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 00:05 Tattoo Fixers 01:10 Cheltenham Festival Highlights 01:55 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA 02:45 Royal Navy School 03:40 Dispatches 04:10 Richard III: The Princes in the Tower 05:05 Location, Location, Location

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:15 Cowboy Builders 13:10 News 13:15 Britain’s Horror Homes 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Film - Dispatch (PG) 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild UK Ben mets the Mason family, who six years ago gave up their London council house in favour of four acres of overgrown agricultural land in Devon 21:00 The Secret Life of the Family Ken and Claire compete over who a local kids group will like better 22:00 Trauma Doctors The air ambulance is on the scene minutes after an elderly woman is hit by an HGV, before being called to respond to a window cleaner who has fallen off his ladder 23:00 Britain’s Worst Crimes: April Jones 00:00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away 01:00 Super Casino 04:10 Kitten Impossible 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Divine Designs 05:45 House Doctor

DON´T MISS

On This Day

JO BRAND’S HELL OF A WALK FOR SPORT RELIEF

BBC1 22:00 SOAPS

Back in January, Jo Brand embarked on a seven-day challenge to walk 135 miles from east to west across the country and cameras followed her every step of the way. The comedian took on the challenge to inspire all overweight, middleaged women across the nation - as well as raise money for Sport Relief 2016.

Starting out on the Humber Bridge with the aim of reaching Liverpool within seven days, she was tested physically and mentally as she battled extreme cold, gale force winds and torrential rain.

they realise Liv has gone to find Gordon. Aaron heads off with Zak to find his sister, but will things get out of control when Sandra arrives?

In Emmerdale, Liv has turned up in the village and she accuses Aaron of being a liar. Aaron tries to reason with her by explaining what Gordon did to him.

Meanwhile, Ashley urges Doug to be there for Laurel and is later relieved to hear that he’s gone to make his peace with his daughter. At the same time, Harriet guesses that Laurel is pregnant. Will she be able to keep this to herself?

Later, Liv snoops through Chas’s phone and finds Gordon’s address. Soon afterwards, Chas and Aaron are horrified when

In Eastenders, Mick grows frustrated at the lack of answers about Ollie’s condition, so Linda sends him home to sup-

port Lee and Nancy as they talk to the police.

Nancy is forced to tell the police officer about Ollie’s recent accident, but Mick assures her that nobody blames her for what happened. Later, though, Mick reveals his true feelings in an honest conversation with Shirley and Buster admitting that he actually does blame Nancy for Ollie’s accident...

Meanwhile, Phil visits a support group, but is shocked when he realises that the counsellor is a face from his past. Not happy over this, he decides to leave - but Ben calls him pathetic for bail-

1984: Boat race halted before starting

ing on the group so easily.

Struggling after the day’s events, Phil heads to The Vic and starts to drink, but things quickly spiral out of control when he brings up Ollie to Mick. Mick attempts to hit Phil but is stopped by Buster.

Elsewhere Stacey’s condition is improving and the doctor suggests a home visit, but Stacey is taken aback when she realises that Martin has to be there.

Stacey is touched when Sonia offers to support the home visit instead. Bex also says that she wants to spend time with her little brother, but Stacey feels guilty about the paternity deception and lies by telling them that Jean has offered to look after her instead.

In the second episode, Martin tells Sonia that he’s only returned to collect his things and is planning to leave the Square for good.

Sonia brands him selfish and insists that he needs to speak to Bex before he storms off. Bex tries her best to change Martin’s mind at The Vic, but when

07:00 Planet’s Funniest Animals 07:20 Dinner Date 08:10 Ellen DeGeneres 09:00 Emmerdale 09:30 Coronation Street 10:00 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 10:35 Catchphrase 11:15 Dinner Date 12:15 Royal Pains 13:10 Emmerdale 13:45 Coronation Street 14:15 You’ve Been Framed 14:45 Ellen DeGeneres 15:40 Judge Rinder 16:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:55 Take Me Out 19:45 The Hot Desk 20:00 Totally You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Scorpion 23:00 Celebrity Juice Live 00:00 @Elevenish 00:30 Family Guy 01:30 American Dad ITV3 07:00 Doctor in the House 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Where the Heart is 09:35 The Royal 10:35 Judge Judy 11:55 Noah’s Ark 13:00 Murder, She Wrote 14:05 Heartbeat 15:05 The Royal 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:20 Doctor in the House 17:50 In Loving Memory 18:20 On the Buses 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Foyle’s War 23:00 A Touch of Frost 01:05 Wire in the Blood ITV4 07:00 Hogan’s Heroes 07:55 The Chase 08:50 The Professionals 09:50 The Sweeney 10:55 Ax Men 11:50 The Chase 12:50 The Professionals 13:55 Pawn Stars 14:50 The Car Chasers 15:50 Hogan’s Heroes 16:55 The Sweeney 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Car Chasers 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 The Classic Car Show 22:00 An Audience with Billy Connolly 23:05 Film Above the Law (18) 01:15 Film - Quadrophenia (18)

07:00 Peter Hurst, 10:00 Trev Massey, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Gordon Lack 19:00 Andy James Kush arrives with Carmel, Martin admits the truth to everyone by revealing that Kush is Arthur’s father.

Later, Martin ignores everyone’s pleas and goes ahead with saying his goodbyes. Just as Martin is about to leave, Kush tells him that he’ll do whatever it takes to make it right. When Martin goes ahead and gets into the cab regardless, will he leave Walford forever?

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Friday 11th March 2016

The Winning Recipe

Dessert

strawberry Ice Cream In A Bag Ingredients 250ml single cream 2 tablespoons caster sugar 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 4 tablespoons of chopped fresh strawberries 4 scoops ice cubes 4 tablespoons coarse salt.

Directions Combine the cream, sugar, vanilla and strawberries in a litre size resealable plastic bag. Press the air out of the bag, seal and shake bag to combine contents. Place the bag into a larger sized resealable plastic bag. Add the ice and salt to the larger bag, press the air out, and seal bag.

Wrap bags in a tea towel.

Shake continuously, until the contents of the small bag thicken into soft ice cream, 5 to 10 minutes.

Rinse the small bag quickly under cold water to wash off salt. Lay the ice cream filled baggie on a flat surface. Use a wooden spoon handle to push the ice cream down to the bottom corner of the baggie. Snip off the corner, and squeeze ice cream into a bowl.

Makes 6-8 600g potatoes, cut into chunks,2 tbsp mayonnaise, 2-3 tbsp harissa, Salt and black pepper, ½ onion, finely diced, 75g dried apricots, finely chopped, 350g cooked skinless mackerel fillets, 1 egg, beaten 3 tbsp flour, 6-8 tbsp panko breadcrumbs, 40g ground pistachios.

Bring a large pan of water to boil and add the potatoes.

Boil until they are tender, but not breaking up. Drain and then return them to the hot pan to allow them to dry out a little. Add the mayonnaise, harissa, then mash them with a fork until they’re smooth and fluffy. Leave the potato to cool.

Fry the onion in a little oil or

butter until it is tender and just starting to brown.

Mix the apricot and the onion into the potatoes. Flake the cooked mackerel, leaving it quite chunky, and fold this into the cooled potato mixture. Add the flour to one, the beaten egg to another and the breadcrumbs and pistachios.

Coat the evenly sized fishcakes, in the egg and finally the breadcrumbs and nuts, chill in the fridge for 30 mins.

Heat 2 tbsp oil in a frying pan and fry the fishcakes over a moderate heat for a few minutes on each side, until they are crisp and golden and warmed through to the centre.

Food & Drink

Gadget That Sprays Your Butter

Watching your toast be torn to pieces thanks to hard chunks of butter that just refuse to spread no matter what is likely to put a dampener on your morning. But now there is a solution - the butter sprayer.

All you have to do is stick the cold butter into the Biēm Butter Sprayer, push a button that melts it, and start spraying in seconds.

The device was created by Doug Foreman from Texas who felt frustrated with store-bought margarine or oil sprays, which are often full of additives.

"So one day I started thinking why isn't there a

simple spray of real butter? I mean, how hard could it be? Well it turns out, it was a lot harder than I thought. But after a couple of years of testing and multiple prototypes we did it.

"Until now, there has never been a way to take a solid stick of real butter and turn it into a handheld spray in seconds, period."

Foreman says his tool is perfect for foods such as garlic bread, steaks, pasta and making butter popcorn with none of that annoying sogginess. He estimates delivery of the first $99 (£69) sprayers will go out in September of this year.

Food & Drink

15

Friday 11th March 2016

Shoulder Of Roast Lamb A , slow-cooked shoulder of roast lamb is the showstopper

Lamb shoulder – the poorer, less desirable cousin of the leg – has a reputation for being tricky to cook and laborious. In fact, the shoulder has to be one the most forgiving and versatile meats – and by far the most delicious.

To make the most of its amazing qualities, marinate the lamb for a few hours and then slow-cook the meat.

Over time, the layers of fat reduce to sticky, unctuous, lip-smacking perfection and help keep the meat moist, so it’s great to reinvent the next day and beyond .

The main event: Slowcooked Moorish spiced lamb shoulder with buttermilk and coriander (pictured above) North African-style spicing works so well with lamb. I do this in an oven and on a barbecue too – both work

incredibly well and both benefit from a good long mari Serves 6-7 1 lamb shoulder, bone in, fat side scored with a very sharp knife, 50ml olive oil, 3 tbsp smoked paprika, 4 tbsp coriander seeds, crushed, 2 tbsp ground cumin, 8 garlic cloves, roughly chopped, 50ml red wine vinegar, Salt and black pepper. For the dressing, 100ml buttermilk, 20ml white wine vinegar ½ bunch fresh coriander, chopped. 1 Lay out a large double layer of foil and put the lamb on top. Pour the oil over the meat, then rub in plenty of seasoning, the paprika, coriander, cumin and garlic. Then drizzle with vinegar. Massage the spices into the meat. Wrap up the foil to completely cover, then put into the fridge for at least

5 hours, or overnight.

2 Heat the oven to 180C/350F/gas mark 4.

Roast the lamb on an oven tray for 2 hours with the foil on. Remove the foil, baste the meat with juices and cook for 1 hour longer to caramelise. Check the meat – you should be able to easily pull the flesh away from the bone. If it is still firm, turn the temperature down to 150C/300F/gas mark 2 and cook for a further 40 minutes.

Remove from the oven and let it rest for 30 minutes.

3 Meanwhile, whisk together all the dressing ingredients.

Season to taste.

4 Remove the bone, then serve the shoulder whole at the table for people to help themselves, with the dressing.nade – preferably overnight.

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Food & Drink

Friday 11th March 2016

Can Any Meal Really Be Worth £255?

Look Beyond Guinness

The Fat Duck - The most famous resturant in Britain

Just over 20 years ago Heston Blumenthal bought a tiny pub on the outskirts of Maidenhead called The Ringers for £240,000. “It was myself, a pot washer and two front-of-house staff.

I think we were the first Michelin-starred restaurant with an outside bog,” he says, laughing. On the original menu there was leek and potato soup for £4, and steak and chips for not much more.

Today, The Fat Duck (as it was renamed) is not just the

most famous restaurant in Britain, but the most expensive too. For people lucky enough to secure one of the 42 slots for lunch or dinner, they need to pay £255 a head for the set menu. If you order the suggested selection of wines, that will set you back a further £155.

That’s over £400 for a meal.

At this price - admittedly less than some people pay to watch the Wimbledon final or Elton John at Wembley - surely, you are appealing to a small group

of very rich people? After all, the average price of a restaurant meal is a mere £14.79 in Britain.

“I’m appealing to anyone,” he says. “We don’t target any specific types of people. If I had a choice, I would like everyone to walk in here and do this...” He rubs his hands in glee. “I want people to feel like a kid in a sweet shop.”

It is, to give him credit, a spectacular, if slightly unhinged, sweet shop. Or, as Kirri Palmer, the head

waitress calls it - “a cross between Willy Wonka and Harry Potter”.

The restaurant reopened towards the end of last year after a nine-month, £2.6 million refurbishment. Out went some of the most famous dishes, such as snail porridge and bacon and egg ice cream, and in came not just new recipes and kit, but an entirely new philosophy: “the first personalised, humanised, restaurant experience,” as Blumenthal calls it. He wants you not just to have a meal, but go on a “journey” (you get a map, rather than a menu, on arrival) that triggers intense childhood memories.

“A lot of the dishes have a fun aspect, but they, in turn, do create a lot of work. For instance, the Counting Sheep dish has the floating pillow,” she says. This is the penultimate dish of the evening, a milky meringue served on a pillow that hovers about three inches above a plastic “cloud” (in which is hidden a magnet, which powers the magic).

“There’s also a fluffy handle on the spoon. That can be a nightmare to clean.”

The thick rabbit fur on the spoon has to be wiped down with Milton at the end of each service. “The idea is you are in the land of nod, and you are almost like you are dreaming. So, the cutlery is heavier for this dish.”

Blumenthal suggests the restaurant is making a very thin profit, if any at all and £255 was as low as he could go. “It should be more. We have five kitchens, all the staff, all the support team. I mean, we have four people in reservations for a 42-seat restaurant. Who pays for that?

The wages alone…

The Fat Duck has a total staff of over 80, including 27 chefs, some working in the development kitchen, but most dedicated to one of the 17 courses.”

It’s good to be Irish.

With a new respect for gay rights and a flourishing economy, Ireland can even enjoy Roy Keane back at a major football tournament. To be sure, there’s a lift in the Irish lilt, and we’re not talking about sales of totally tropical soft drinks because the country is also enjoying a resurgent whiskey industry and brewing the occasional quality craft beer.

All of which means this St Patrick’s Day deserves a little more consideration, and ignoring the fact that leprechaun outfits still rank highest on Google searches for St Patrick’s fancy dress, we feel an appropriate way to celebrate is to sip some genuine products of origin.

To that end we suggest a mixed bag of lovely liquor that will slake your thirst on March 17, spirits and beer that point to the epic heritage and embrace the resurgence of the island.

Irish whiskey It’s a subject of mass debate, but some historians credit Irish monks with the invention of whiskey. Whatever you believe (and for the purposes of this feature, we believe they did) the Irish certainly enjoyed a useful distilling industry that regrettably lost its way in the 19th and 20th century.

Now it is on the mend.

Across the country you’ll find new distilleries popping up, with Glendalough, Blackwater and Rademon Estate representing a new ambition that could promise much in the coming years.

Jameson will be more familiar to drinkers, but is a whiskey that navigated its way through the distilling turmoil and is our goto gear for St Patrick’s Day. Made at the Middleton Distillery in Cork, home to some exceptional distilling and aging experimentation, we’d highly recommend the Jameson Caskmates (£25.98), which has been rested in casks originally loaned to Franciscan Wells brewery for its stout. Adding a touch of the creamy beer to the flavour brings a new

touch of bitter sweet dark chocolate to the whiskey and makes this an incredible value for money spirit.

But if you’re keen to kick back with a luxurious liquid, then river dance the night away with Red Breast 1999 Single Cask. Bottled at 59.9% this single-pot whiskey is a statement offering from the Middleton distillery and has been rested in a 500litre sherry butt. We like big butts and we cannot lie that this is a tasty beverage. Matured for 16 years, 147 days, as you might expect, it showcases the full impact of European oak seasoned with oloroso, rich, dark sugar with winter fruits, spicy figs, a touch of citrus and delicious oak to deliver a massive mouthful of flavour. There are only 500 and it’s exclusive to the Whiskey Exchange so you’ll need to be quick.

Poitín In its original form, an illicit and potent poitín could prove more addictive than good craic and left more than a few Irish eyes bleeding, but this resilient feature of old Irish sheds has been romanticised and stories of "mama’s poitín" rival the Italian’s familial pasta pride. While some of the unlicensed poitín tasted like fire, there were a few that might have made it, so it’s encouraging new producers are using the traditions as an impetus to make a liquid we can actually enjoy among the new wave of Bán Poitín, pronounced "born".

Poitín might be compared to new make whiskey but the addition of potato and beet makes for a very different flavour than a simple grain distillate. Bán also uses nearly all Irish ingredients, potatoes that have been farmed by the distillery, making it a true homegrown hero. Full mouthfeel and slightly sweet, it is a surprisingly robust sip, and while suggested serve is neat with stout, we can recommend mixing with ginger beer or sipping slowly on its own, since it comes in at 48% abv.

Food & Drink

Friday 11th March 2016

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Friday 11th March 2016

DVD’S The Night Before

The Costa Blanca´s Biggest and Best Live Local radio station - TKO fm - are currently looking for RADIO PRESENTERS to enhance their current rosta.

If you think that you have a voice that people will listen to – and have what it takes to Plan - Produce and Present a structured, informative and entertaining 2 or 3 hour live show within pre set musical guidelines - to a discerning target audience – then get in touch.

You may have had previous experience – or maybe you are just thinking that it is something you would like to do.

Either way – in the first instance send a 2 minute mp3 file showing off your voice and presenting talents and style to tkomedia2015@gmail.com with a brief covering note explaining why you think you should be On Air! Remember, experience is not required if you are the right person for the job and all applications will be treated in the strictest of confidence – but those without the required mp3 file will not be considered, so get recording. Your radio future is waiting.

BOX OFFICE

TOP 10

1. Zootopia 2. London Has Fallen 3. Deadpool 4. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot 5. Gods of Egypt 6. Risen 7. Kung Fu Panda 3 8. The Revenant 9. Eddie the Eagle 10. The VVitch: A NewEngland Folktale

London Has Fallen Review

DIRECTOR Babak Najafi GENRE Action SYNOPSIS London Has Fallen may not be better than Olympus Has Fallen, but it certainly is bigger, and it will probably satisfy most action junkies, if not in a theater then in the comfort of their own home.

RELEASE DATE 4 March 2016 DURATION 99mins Critics were polarized by Anthony Fuqua's action film Olympus Has Fallen, about an ex-secret service agent who busts into the White House to save the U.S. President from terrorists.

As it happens, my opinion of the film mostly lines up with Jim Vejvoda's IGN review of the film. While the villains and situations were decidedly over the top, the action was fast-paced and brutal, and Gerard Butler kicked all

kinds of ass in it. Overall, I enjoyed the movie.

For fans of Olympus Has Fallen, London Has Fallen offers the same mindless thrills, and in true sequel fashion the stakes have never been higher. In this new film, the British Prime Minister has just passed away, and his funeral is a must-attend event for all the world leaders.

But as you probably guessed, they're walking into a trap, laid by a vengeful arms dealer who wants them all dead. Unfortunately for that guy, the President of the United States (Aaron Eckhart) brought Mike Banning (Gerard Butler) with him, and they don't plan on going down without a fight.

If that premise sounds familiar to you, that's because it's almost the exact same setup as the first movie, starting with another intricate terror-

ist attack. Weirdly, though, there's almost no reference to the events of first film whatsoever. Asher's dead wife, Banning's heroics, the once-decimated White House -- for all intents and purposes, none of these things ever happened.

Basically, London Has Fallen hits the reset button on all the characters -- and I mean all the characters, right down to Robert Forster's.

From there, Banning fights his way through hordes of enemies much in the same way he did three years ago.

Meanwhile, Morgan Freeman's Trumball, now promoted to VP, is back in the Situation Room to guide Banning and FaceTime the bad guys. Still, the actor has a knack for making exposition sound way cooler than it actually is, and it's nice to have him back for the few

scenes he's in.

Honestly, apart from the new setting, the biggest difference here is that Eckhart's President tags along with Banning for most of the movie. Instead of trying to save the President from a hostage situation, Banning is tasked with safely escorting him out of the country before he's assassinated. Same goes for Angela Bassett's Secret Service Director, who also ends up joining them.

Of course, the main draw here is Butler, and he seems right at home playing Banning again, for better or for worse. As with the first film, Banning's antics are ridiculous and single-minded, but that's part of what makes them fun. And while the villains are as onedimensional as ever, the close quarters combat is bone-crunchingly satisfying, if a little muddy in spots.

Oropesa del Mar- A Complete Family Destination The privileged geographical and natural conditions of Oropesa del Mar and its strategic position between the sea and the mountain offer endless possibilities to enjoy a lovely stay. This beautiful and historical municipality in the province of Castellón combines relaxation, culture and fun for all ages. Come on, Oropesa awaits!

Visit places such as El Mirador on top of Monte del Bovalar, where you’ll

be able to see the islands belonging to Parque Natural de las Islas Columbretes on a sunny day. From the green way on the coast you can also make out the Iberian settlement in Orpesa la Vella, the Moorish castle or the mighty Torre del Rey. Take part in all kinds of popular activities such as the 1st Roller Maratón Playas de Castellón Internacional, an event that will take place on the 12th and 13th of

March. You could also practice some of the activities offered during the weekend in the sailing club.

In Oropesa del Mar, you’ll hear about amazing cannon battles between pirates and will get the chance to see the remains of many different cultures while you walk or ride your bike all through the beautiful routes that cover this natural area. You will also

be able to practice all kinds of sport ashore and at sea, walk around while you enjoy the sun or rest on the fine sand in one of its wide beaches and dream coves. Taste its excellent gastronomy combining the best sea products with land resources, enjoy yourself in any of the eight wonderful amusement parks and take part in endless events during the whole year.

For ten years, Ethan, Isaac and Chris have spent every Christmas E v e together on the anniversary of the passing of Ethan's parents who died w h e n they were children. Unlike some who mourn, the three friends don't spend the entire night sharing bad memories.

Instead, they party hard.

Youth Youth is about two old friends in the twilight of their careers. They take a trip to the Swiss Alps, where they discuss their past, their future and their art. Fred, a famous composer, is certain that his music a l career is o v e r .

Mick, an acclaimed film director, is feverishly working on the screenplay for the movie that may be his last. During the course of their vacation, they discover that life still has the capacity to surprise them.

Sunshine Superman From an early age, Carl Boenish had a passion for skydiving and other adrenaline-filled activities. He became fascinated with the concept of extreme sports t h a t allowed humans to feel like they were flying. While using a ram-air parachute, Carl began to jump off of high buildings and cliffs.

Carl's actions founded the modern BASE jumping movement, and he eventually managed to break world records for BASE jumping along with his wife.

Friday 11th March 2016

Friends Of

Hi there everybody from TKO Teddy and the countdown is really on for me getting involved in next Thursday’s St. Patrick’s Day parade on the Orihuela Costa. It’s going to be great and I’ll have to get something green for the day!

That’s not to say that I haven’t been putting my paws about the area over the last week or so, and I dropped into two businesses that have been putting some firm roots down in Quesada. That’s the main base for those nice folk at Mist Jewellery who had an open day last Saturday and I enjoyed meeting everybody there. Then I just walked (or perhaps jogged!)

down the Avenida de las Naciones to visit Diamond Flores who have just opened up their new premises. They were nice enough to give away a bouquet for a TKO FM listener for Mother’s Day, and I was really impressed with them with all their years of experience here in the area.

We all know that Samaritans in Spain do a great job, and so I was delighted to drop at their charity shop which was celebrating three years of being in business at the Punta Marina Commercial Centre. I’ve been there before and know all about their brilliant work, so well done to everybody involved!

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Friday 11th March 2016

Jeanette Erath - Learn Spanish

35

A Very Useful Modal Verb!

Last week we covered a few verbs that can be used as modal verbs. I gave you some translations to complete so how did you do?

Here are the translations. Well done for having a go, whatever your level you´re still ahead of those who´ve never tried: You have to see your son´s teacher – tienes quever el profesor de tu hijo, We may go to Bilbao next week – Posiblemente va yamos a Bilbao la semana que viene, I used to go for a run every morning – solíair a corer todas las mañanas, you have to be careful – tienes que tener cuidado, I usually go often – sueloir a menudo, I might buy a car next year – quí zas compre un coche el próximo año, We usually go to the beach once a week in summer -

solemos ir a la playa una vez a la semana en verano, I used to play the clarinet when I was young – Solía tocar el clarinet cuando era joven, I might go to the party but I´m not sure – quí zas vaya a la fiesta, pero no estoy seguro, my sister used to run marathons, but she doesn´t run at all now – mi hermana solía corer maratones, pero ella no corre nada ahora, we have to lose weight! – ¡tenemos que perder peso!

So I promised you a very useful modal verb this week and I don´t think you´ll be disappointed. The verb we are looking at is poder which literally translates as: to be able to. The normal present simple meaning is can, i.e. I can – puedo, you can – puedes, he/she/it can – puede,you can – podéis,

we can – podemos, they can - pueden. This is used as a modal as it´s impossible to use it on its own without another verb following it and it gives a sense of probability. Last week we covered ´might´ in English and this verb can also be used instead of the options I gave you then, for example She may not leave –Puedeque no salga, and remember when used in this way it is followed by the subjunctive as there is an element of doubt.

However it can also be used to mean ´could´ when talking about requests, etc and it´s used in the conditional, in order for it to mean could in this way we conjugate it thus: podría, podrías, podría, podríamos, podríais, podrían.

For example: You could try on

this one – podrías probarte éste. But of course in English we only have the word ´could´ which is used in the conditional and also as the past tense of can, therefore in Spanish there are many conjugations that you need to think about. As a conditional the conjugations are as above, but then you have to think about using it in the past and learning the past tenses of the verb. When used in the preterite or imperfect you need to think about whether it´s a onetime event (preterite) or whether it happened over a period of time (imperfect).

E.g: No pudo dormer porquedormía – she couldn´t work (that particular time) because she was sleeping; No podia trabajar porque dormía con

frequencia – she couldn´t work because she was often sleeping.

When we talk about things that could have happened but didn´t the Spanish tend to use the preterite, to express possibility we can use either the conditional or the imperfect, as illogical as it seems it´s perfectly acceptable in Spanish.

Therefore you can see that poder is a very useful verb that expresses possibility in many ways, but as all verbs in Spanish there is a lot to learn with regards to the verb with all its conjugations. This can be done over time now you know when to use it and how, have a look at the different conjugations and have a go at these exercises:

She could have left at 3 o'clock, Could you give me a pencil?, We could go to the movies, Joe could speak Spanish when he was young, I couldn´t sleep last night, Could you play an instrument when you were a child?, You could pass the test if you studied, I think it could rain later, Could you help me?

Have fun with the above translations and I´ll give you my version of them next week!

Remember that I offer Spanish classes at all levels including an intermediate class Saturday mornings and so after you´ve been to the market in Almoradí come along for one a half hours of fun Spanish with my native teacher, Mila.

Contact me for more details on voicespain@gmail.com.

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Health

Friday 11th March 2016

Nagging Smokers Does Not Help Them Quit Contact@medb.es

Website: www.medb.es

Simple activities make it more likely smokers will cut down on cigarettes

Being nagged does not help smokers to quit, a new study has found, as

researchers said offering emotional encouragement once they have stopped is

the best way to keep them off cigarettes.

Simple activities such as

helping out with practical tasks like shopping or looking after the children made it more likely smokers would cut down on smoking, the study found.

The study by the University of Aberdeen and the University of Zurich tracked the behaviour of 100 couples with one smoker and one non-smoker.

"There are many things that are not helpful in stopping smoking - such as nagging or trying to control the situation" Dr Gertraud Stadler In the study, smokers and their partners were asked to use mobile phones to keep a diary of the support their partner offered prior to and after their pre-set quit date.

They were then followed up to monitor their progress in

stopping smoking.

Dr Gertraud Stadler, senior lecturer in health psychology at the University of Aberdeen, said: "These results are really helpful when making a plan to stop smoking.

"According to this study, the smoker's chance of stopping smoking would increase if we can train the partners to give more tailored support according to the smokers' habits.

"The whole idea behind these studies was to really understand what happens on a day to day basis when one partner quits smoking and importantly, what the other can do to help them.

"We asked couples to keep diaries ten days before the smoker tried to quit and for 21 days after.

This meant we could look at whether quitting success differs whether the nonsmoking partner provides support beforehand or after the quit date.

"We found that support was most beneficial when given after the quit date.

This makes sense given that this was when the help was really needed.

"We know that there are many things that are not helpful in stopping smoking - such as nagging or trying to control the situation.

"These results show that we should encourage the partner to offer emotional support as well as practical help like taking care of the kids. There are lots of things that partners can do to help their significant others quit."

Decline Of Bees Threatens World Crops In Europe, nine percent of bee and butterfly species are threatened with extinction Many species of bees, butterflies and other creatures that are vital to agricultural pollination are threatened with extinction, posing risks to major world crops and global biodiversity, a UN body said Friday.

"Many wild bees and butterflies have been declining in abundance, occurrence and diversity at local and

regional scales in Northwest Europe and North America," said an assessment by the Intergovernmental SciencePolicy Platform on Biodiversity and Ecosystem Services (IPBES).

It said declines in pollinators -- which also include a vast range of other insects, bats, birds and other animals -- had also been detected

elsewhere in the world.

The problem facing policymakers is that scientists remain unsure exactly which factors are the biggest drivers.

The world's first assessment of its kind said possible causes include habitat loss, pesticides, pollution, invasive species, pathogens, climate change and the spread of vast farms dedicated to a single product, which suppresses biodiversity.

The IPBES was established under UN auspices in 2012 to assess the state of global biodiversity.

It said healthy populations of the creatures are critical to ensuring stable fruit and vegetable output, as concerns rise over the challenge of feeding the world's people in coming decades.

Among its findings, it said animal pollination is directly responsible for between five and eight percent of global agricultural production by volume, amounting to between $235 billion and $577 billion worth of annual output.

But more than three-quarters of the "leading types of global food crops" also rely to some extent on animal pollination for yield and quality.

"Pollinator-dependent species encompass many fruit, vegetable, seed, nut and oil crops, which supply major proportions of micronutrients, vitamins, and minerals in the human diet," the IPBES said.

- Bee populations in peril Pollination is the transfer of pollen between the male

and female parts of flowers to enable reproduction.

The assessment is the work of nearly 80 scientists from around the world and was released at an IPBES meeting in Kuala Lumpur.

It is the first report by the four-year-old group, which is considered the biodiversity equivalent of the UN-organised Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC).

In Europe, nine percent of bee and butterfly species are threatened with extinction and populations are declining for 37 percent of bee species and 31 percent of butterfly species for which sufficient data is available, the IPBES said.

In some places in Europe more than 40 percent of bee species may be threatened.

A "data gap" has frustrated efforts to assess the situ-

ation in Latin America, Asia, and Africa, but the same drivers are suspected to be at work in those regions.

Data is more solid for noninsect pollinators such as bats and birds, however, with the IPBES saying 16 percent of such species worldwide are threatened with extinction.

Some of the most important world food staples such as rice, wheat and other grains do not rely on animal pollination.

But vulnerable crops could include everything from apples and mangoes, to chocolate and almonds, and many other commonly consumed foods, said Simon Potts, co-chair of the assessment.

"Pretty much nearly all your fruits and many of your vegetables are pollinationdependent," said Potts,

deputy director of the Centre for Agri-Environmental Research at Britain's Reading University.

Policy options could be as simple as planting more flowers, the group said.

But it also mentioned overall better protection of natural environments and ecosystems, limiting the scope of intensive agriculture, encouraging sustainable farming, and finding alternatives to pesticides, the IPBES said.

IPBES members stressed that the group's role was to provide evidence rather than specific recommendations for governments, and the report refrains from issuing any specific call for action.

The assessment said pollinator declines also could lower crop yields, raising prices for consumers and reducing agricultural profits.

Health Dr M. Mannu

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Friday 11th March 2016

Are You Suffering From Insomnia Contact@medb.es

People suffering insomniado not get enough hours of sleep, or they feel they are not getting enough sleep at night. Older people who may be sleeping less may

feel they are suffering from insomnia, but in reality, the older we get, the less sleep we need. Many people over the age of 70 need just 4 hours sleep daily. Seniors

who sleep for less than 6 hours during the night and feel refreshed after sleep, may be getting all the sleep they need. And rather than trying to sleep some more when awake, they should find an activity to keep them occupied, such as reading.

Nevertheless, many elderly people have signs of insomnia and suffer symptoms such as - finding it difficult to get to sleep, waking up very early and not being able to get back to sleep, feeling tired and irritable during the day.

A number of factors can cause insomnia. Chronic diseases such as Asthma,

Website: www.medb.es MedB Health Dr Mannu

arthritis, sinus problems, hormonal disorders, etc. will cause insomnia. Moreover, some medications also cause insomnia such as those prescribed for high blood pressure, asthma and allergies. Insomnia is also associated with stress, anxiety and depression. When we are stressed and worried, and thoughts are running through our minds, it can be difficult to fall asleep.

Rather than let your mind roam from one thought to another, you should use your mind to figure out what you’re worried about and what steps you can take to resolve the matter. If it’s an

issue from the past that you can’t do anything about, then you have to let it go.

Our sleep cycle is regulated by a hormone called melatonin which is produced at night. Current studies suggest that most people are deficient in melatonin mainly from artificial lighting at night, and poor absorption of the amino acid tryptophan that is required to produce melatonin. YTE (Young Tissue Extract) is a good source of tryptophan and promotes deep and restful sleep in addition to regenerating damaged tissues and organs in the body.

TIPS TO HELP YOU SLEEP Avoid Coffee, Stimulants, and Heavy meals just before you go to bed Try and keep a consistent sleep schedule Create a sleep time ritual Get Comfortable Limit daytime naps Exercise during the daytime

Alzheimer’s Disease Could Be Caused

By Herpes Virus It's time to face up to the fact Alzheimer's is probably caused by viruses and bacteria, say scientists Alzheimer’s disease could be caused by viruses like herpes, a group of renowned dementia experts have warned, as they call for urgent investigation into the link.

The worldwide team of 31 senior scientists and clinicians, which include specialists from Oxford,

Cambridge, Edinburgh and Manchester Universities and Imperial College, have written an editorial which suggests that microbes are the major cause of dementia.

The herpes virus - the type which causes cold sores - and chlamydia bacteria are named as the

major culprits, as well as a type of corkscrew-shaped bacteria which is called spirochaete.

“There is incontrovertible evidence that Alzheimer’s Disease has a dormant microbial component. We can’t keep ignoring all of the evidence” Professor Douglas Kell,

Manchester University Currently most scientists are trying to find treatments which prevent the build of sticky amyloid plaques and misfolded tau proteins in the brain which prevent neurons from communicating with each other, leading to memory loss and cognitive decline.

But in an the editorial in the Journal of Alzheimer’s Disease, it is suggested that it is a viral or bacterial infection which triggers the plaque build-up in the first place. Targeting them

specifically with antimicrobial drugs could halt dementia.

Professor Douglas Kell of the University of Manchester’s School of Chemistry, said “We are saying there is incontrovertible evidence that Alzheimer’s Disease has a dormant microbial component. We can’t keep ignoring all of the evidence.”

There are currently 850,000 people living with dementia in Britain which is due to rise to one million by 2025 and two million by

2050. But despite 412 drugs trials taking place between 2002 and 2012, nothing has been shown to combat the disease.

The authors say that viruses and bacteria are common in the brains of elderly people, and although they are usually dormant, they can ‘wake up’ after stress or if the immune system is compromised. Around two thirds of people will acquire the herpes virus at some point in their lives, and many will not realise they have it.

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Motoring

Friday 11th March 2016

New Bugatti Chiron Is £1.9 Million!

Bugatti reveals replacement for its record breaking Veyron

The Bugatti Chiron is the “world’s most powerful, fastest, most luxurious and most exclusive production super sports car”, its manufacturer claimed. This bold statement coincides with its global reveal at the Geneva Motor Show that runs from March 3rd - 13th 2016.

Power comes courtesy of the 8.0-litre, W16, petrol engine that produces 1,479bhp and 1,600Nm of

torque between 2,000 and 6,000rpm.

For comparison, The Bugatti Veyron Super Sport is its predecessor and the production car with the highest top speed in the world – yet it generates a comparatively mere modest 1,200bhp / 1,500Nm of torque.

As of now there is no “official” 0 - 62mph time, but expect less than 2.5 seconds thanks, in part, to the

engine's 4 turbochargers.

Only 2 chargers operate before 3,800rpm to improve throttle response, then their siblings kick-in at higher engine revolutions.

Chiron top speed is limited to 261mph for “road use”, but this looks set to be eclipsed by versions that compete for speed records. Tantalisingly, the largest number on the speedometer is 310mph.

New Chiron prices start

from £1.9 million then optional extras could increase the cost considerably. Production

is limited to 500 vehicles and the manufacturer has taken deposits on about 170.

Rumours suggest that a particularly well-healed customer ordered 6.

David Coulthard To Take Part In New Racing Festival In Glasgow

Motor racing star David Coulthard will take part in Glasgow's first ever street circuit this summer as part of a new motoring festival at the city's SSE Hydro complex.

Ignition Festival of Motoring will come to Scotland on August 5 to 7 for the first time giving racing fans a chance to see Formula 1 on the streets of Glasgow.

As well as paying homage to some of the world’s finest motor sporting heroes, the event, organised by the team behind Top Gear Live, will showcase all aspects of motoring. It will even close roads around the SECC and SSE Hydro Arena to create Glasgow’s first ever street circuit.

Scotland’s own F1 star David Coulthard will take to the specially constructed Street Circuit in the Red Bull Racing RB7, giving fans a unique opportunity to see and hear a Formula 1 machine up close.

And there will be further track action from a wild selection of race, rally and supercars as well as bikes.

Jeremy Vaughan, Event

Director, said: “Scotland’s rich heritage and passion for motor sport coupled with Glasgow’s proven ability to stage world leading events makes it the perfect location for our innovative IGNITION Festival of Motoring.

“Following early discussions, the immediate enthusiasm from Glasgow City Council, the SECC, media, manufacturers and dealers – not to mention Scotland’s fervent motoring fans – showed there was a huge demand for a new kind of dynamic motoring event in Scotland. We’re delighted to be launching Ignition in Glasgow.”

Councillor Frank McAveety, leader of Glasgow City Council, said: “We're really looking forward to hosting the inaugural Ignition Festival of Motoring.

“The announcement of the Street Circuit is incredibly exciting as it marks a UK first for Glasgow and will put the city right at the heart of the action.

“It makes perfect sense for Ignition to make its home in Glasgow as we're a city that's always on the move and we have a history of welcoming the world's elite supercars and drivers, having previously provided the backdrop for thrilling scenes in the Fast & Furious 6 movie as well being the starting point for the iconic Monte Carlo Rally.

"Today's announcement reinforces Glasgow's enviable reputation as a worldclass destination which

works with major event organisers to create showstopping events that pack a real punch for audiences."

Track action will continue across all three days of the show and will be complemented by displays of iconic cars including a collection of local hero Colin McRae’s rally cars.

The Top Gear Live Stunt team will inject further thrills into the event as they bring excitement and flair to the live action zone while a Supercar Pavillion curated by Top Gear magazine will display the finest supercars and hypercars from Bugattis to Zondas.

Further display areas include a Motor Sport Hall, celebrating Scottish success in the competition arena, and a Motorbike Hall of twowheel machines from superbikes and café racers to sports touring bikes and custom cruisers.

Those who enjoy motoring’s heritage will find their favourites in the Classic and Vintage Hall which will be filled with mouth-watering machines from the great marques of the past as well as showcasing lovingly restored classics from car club members.

Add to this the latest from manufacturers and dealers, a test car facility where visitors can get behind the wheel themselves and a young driver area to wet the appetite of our next generation of drivers.

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Friday 11th March 2016

Visit the website, n332.es

Can I Put a Flag on My Car?

NOT Allowed As many people across the globe prepare to celebrate one of the biggest partys in the Irish calendar, St Patrick´s day, we need to be prepared for what that might mean to those of us who drive. Alcohol and drugs pose a major problem on the roads, but there are also some hidden dangers that many people may not be aware are problematic, and some of those problem areas are also covered by traffic law. During celebrations like St Patrick´s Day, the temptation to hang a flag from your car might be greater than usual, but we must be aware of how these flags can become a danger, unless it is done correctly.

Of course we are not just talking about St Patrick´s day, but flags in general, whether it is of a country, a football team or just a group to which you belong, carrying a flag to show your support is something that many people may consider, but it can also lead to fines from the traffic police if your flag does not comply with the regulations, not because the flag may show support for another country, but because they can lead to danger.

Artículo 14 of the Reglamento Circulacion deals with the distribution of loads, under the heading “Disposición de la carga”.

Although a flag may not be

considered to be a “load”, because it is an element which is additional to the normal fixtures of the vehicle, then it qualifies as such.

As such, in the interests of safety, anything carried on a vehicle must not drag fully or partially, fall or move dangerously, interfere with vehicle stability, produce noise, dust or other problems that can be avoided and must not hide the lighting and signals, number plates or anything else which could interfere with manual warnings of the drivers.

Anything which is placed

Allowed

Classic Cars

We have been asked by a number of classic car owners and associations about the laws that refer specifically to this type of vehicle and what provisions the drivers must make when driving on Spanish roads.

Royal Decree 1247/1995, deals with the reglamento de vehículos históricos, rules for historic vehicles, or classic cars, under article 10 of the Normas de circulación.

First and foremost, unless rules are specifically in place for this type of vehicle, classic cars are governed by the same laws and rules as normal vehicles, including the requirement of liability insurance.

The rules relating to the technical inspection and reg-

istration are also applicable, as per normal vehicles. The period of the technical inspection also remains the same, unless otherwise indicated in the official report.

Those vehicles which, on account of their age or constructive characteristics, do not have lights or indicators as are normally required by law, they are not allowed to travel between sunset and sunrise, or in circumstances which would normally require the use of these lights and indicators.

Historic vehicles that are not able to exceed the speed of 40 kilometres per hour should drive on the shoulder, if practicable and it is sufficient, or, alternatively, as close as possible to the right

outside the vehicle when it is moving will produce drag.

Cars and road vehicles are designed through extensive testing in wind tunnels in order for them to minimise this.

Quite clearly, if a flag is of a large enough size, it will produce considerable drag.

It may well interfere with the view of lights, number plates and other fixtures, and could blow or fall into the path of other road users, and is a risk in terms of becoming loose or entangles in either the vehicle carrying it, or others.

Therefore, quite clearly,

outside edge of the roadway, except when overtaking or turning left, manoeuvres which may force other drivers to abruptly change the direction or speed of their vehicles. Historic vehicles are not allowed on the motorway if they are unable to reach a speed of at least 60 kilometres per hour.

The Dirección General de Tráfico also reserves the right to prohibit classic cars on certain dates and routes, if they are not able to exceed the speed of 80 kilometres per hour.

As for situation when classic cars can travel on the roads as a group, Annex II of the Reglamento General de Circulación, article 32 of section 3 details Participación de vehículos históricos and refers to the question of group activities.

Vehicles categorised as classic cars under Royal Decree 1247/1995, or over 25 years old and in numbers greater than 10, and with a speed of less than 50 kilometres per hour on average, as well as participating in events or demonstrations, rallies, competitions or, in general, any kind of event in which there is established classification on the basis of vehicle movement, either in terms of speed or regularity, will require administrative authorisation.

Allowed large flags are not allowed.

However, there are smaller, purpose built flags which are permitted. These are often seen attached to the windows of vehicles, or sometimes as part of the main structure, such as one might see in a Presidential limousine.

Similarly, there are other accessories available which can be fitted to a vehicle safely, such as covers for the wing mirrors, so long as the active view of the mirror is not obscured.

A flag draped or tied across the bonnet or roof, or any part of the vehicle, would not be permitted, nor would covers to the sun visors, which could interfere

with the visibility of the driver.

There are some exceptions to this rule when a road is closed to normal traffic, such as when an organised parade is taking place, at which time, larger flags are permitted.

If you do wish to display a flag on your car during normal driving conditions, take into account the size of the flag as there are no approved flags for use on the car, and small enough to not pose any kind of risk. If you do this, your patriotism can be displayed for all to see, but fall foul of the law and the consequences will be a considerable financial burden.

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Friday 11th March 2016

RICHARD CAVENDER

BlueMoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca.

BlueMoon Solutions come to you at home or work, our personal service covers from Alicante to Pilar de la Horadada.

Richard moved to Spain ten years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to sort out the problem there and then.

Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Brenda wanted to remove an incorrect address ADVICE: Brian was having problems installing a flight simulator program onto his computer that she had accidentally added to her autocomplete list.

Q

Hola Team, I use Gmail for emails using Google Chrome.When I sign in, on entering the first letter my address appears underneath for me to click on.My problem is after entering my address I continued to enter password all on the same line, nowI have two addresses coming up one with email and one with email address and p/word.How can I delete this address? Many Thanks Brenda

A

Hi Brenda, ok what you need to do is clear your “autocomplete” settings, you can do this by going into Google Chrome, click the three bars in the top right of the screen, click “Settings” and then scroll down and click “Show Advanced Settings”.

Now scroll down some more until you reach the section “Passwords and Forms”, here you click on “Manage Autofill Settings” and then simply locate the incorrect listing and click on the cross to the right of it to remove it.

Q

Morning Liesl and Richard,can you give me some advice please? I acquired a flight simulator recently for a with several discs. When I came to install it the first disc (installation disc) makes a continuous clicking noise and will not install.I have tested it with another disc (film) and it works perfectly. I run a Samsung laptop on windows 10, could you offer a word of advice please. I await with wheel chocks still on.

Muchas gracias, Brian.

A

Hi Brian, it sounds very much like the CD itself is faulty, sometimes you can work around this problem by cleaning the CD with a clean cloth – something with a cotton type material, just rub the material over the CD to ensure that any marks or spills are removed from it and try it again, if that doesn’t work then I would return the

ADVICE: William was having issues with this @ sign.

Q A

Hi Richard, I am having trouble with my laptop, @ sign has now moved from its button to the No 2 button.

If you have the Spanish keyboard layout loaded onto your computer then when you press this same key you will be an ‘Ñ’ sign as that is what is on that key on a Spanish keyboard.

On a Spanish keyboard the @ sign is on the number 2, so I suspect that your keyboard layout has changed to Spanish, you can change this back using the “region and language” setting within Windows 10 (if that’s the operating system that you are using?

CD for a replacement. office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Office: 902 906 200 Mobile: 655 044 970

Don’t forget you can follow me on Facebook www.facebook.com/bluemoonsolutionsspain/ Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es/newsletter .

41

Friday 11th March 2016

Business Directory FOR SALE

CHURCH SERVICES Torrevieja Christian Fellowship at Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas 68, Torrevieja 03183, all welcome to their friendly and lively 10.30 am. Service each Sunday morning.

They will not be holding the Wednesday night meeting at 6.00 pm. For further information and/or directions please telephone 966700391 or visit our website on www.tcfspain.org.

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier.

Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club.Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo.Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

966 921 003 thecourier.es

GARDENING SERVICES

STAFF WANTED

Monthly Pool Maintenance from 45€ per month.

Monthly Garden Maintenance from 20€ per month. The SPECIALISTS in Community & Private Pools & Gardens, Irrigation Installation, Service and Repairs. Palm Tree Pruning etc..

Underwater Pool Repairs without the need to drain your pool. Call Mike on 698 384 449.

QUIZ MASTER

SITUATIONS VACANT

TUITION

RADIO COSTA MEDIA needs self-employed salesperson for Torrevieja & surrounding areas. Call 685 901 265 or email info@radiocosta.eu

Guitar lessons for beginners, as well as improvers. From 10€ per hour. Call Peter NOW on 966789612 or Mobile number 629975378.

Experienced quiz-master /question setter with personality If you would like a quiz master that is entertaining, questions that are challenging yet not too difficult and is available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel: 664 838 581.

Using Instagram for your Business Your weekly guide to maximising your business with TKO Media

This handy four-point guide was published on socialmediaexaminer.com, and gives some great tips for businesses to get started on Instagram. Remember to follow @tkomedia and hashtag #tkomedia to showcase your campaigns. #1: Increase Web Traffic With an Instagram Contest Instagram contests let you showcase your products, attract leads, and grow your followers all at the same time. Plus, contests are just plain fun.

Instagram contests let you showcase your products while attracting leads and followers, and driving traffic at the same time.

You can adopt this tactic for your own busi-

ness by announcing your contest on Instagram and sending Instagram users to your online store’s blog for a chance to win.

If you want to run an Instagram contest for your business, you can simply offer a free product to celebrate a particular company milestone. If the milestone is Instagram-related, all the better! You’ll promote customer loyalty and gain free publicity when fans tag their friends. #2: Inform Your Story With Video Video can complement the photos in your Instagram account by telling stories through moving animation. According to a Vidyard report, 71% of marketers say video conversion rates outperform other types of marketing content.

Instagram lets you record videos that are between 3 and 15 seconds long, which is more than enough time to grab the attention of your prospects and customers. Plus, adding a few videos to your Instagram stream will provide some variety in your imagery.

You can record your own short Instagram video to complement the images you post.

Simply tap the middle icon in the row of icons

at the bottom of the Instagram app. This opens up your photo and video capabilities.

Once open, tap on the Video tab and click the red button to begin recording your clip. #3: Jumpstart Interest With Instagram Ads You see sponsored ads from businesses all over Instagram. They allow you to put your products or services in front of the specific audience you want to reach. In other words, you can target a customer demographic beyond just your current Instagram followers.

When you use Instagram ads to show your products in action, you help viewers understand how they can use your products. This is the same concept used by ecommerce stores when they show high-quality images of people using their products to give customers a sense of what they’re buying.

Instagram ads that show your product in action are a great way to connect with customers and prospects because they show people how to use the product.

The good news is that businesses of all sizes can now create and run Instagram ads. All you need to start is a Facebook page. Then during the ad setup process, you’ll set a budg-

et for your ad, select a target audience, and create the ad content. For a step-by-step walkthrough, check out this article about how to create an Instagram ad with Facebook Ads Manager. #4: Drive Foot Traffic With Appealing Photos Instagram users respond to beautiful, captivating, and creative photos. Strong images can help you boost engagement, and if you’re a local business, they can drive customers to your location. On your Instagram account, you want to post photos that show your products in the best possible light.

By showcasing signature dishes with appetizing photos, restaurants can build a following on Instagram and drive more patrons to their dining room.

You can easily adapt this marketing strategy to promote your products and business. All you have to do is snap away at your products (whether through the in-app camera or a professional photographer you hire) and then upload the images to your Instagram account.

Use your product to tell your story and invite viewers to come see you.

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43

Friday 11th March 2016

£30 Cap For Away Tickets

All On The Line

Wales head coach Warren Gatland has named an unchanged team to face England in tomorrow’s (Saturday) Six Nations showdown encounter at Twickenham.

Gareth Davies retains the scrumhalf spot ahead of Rhys Webb, who is named among the replacements.

Webb, 27, was recalled to the squad after six months away from international rugby with injury. Lock Luke Charteris is on the bench where Paul James comes in to cover the injured loosehead Gethin Jenkins.

"We've named a pretty experienced side for Saturday," said Gatland.

"We have a couple of guys back from injury on the bench, Luke Charteris, Paul James and Rhys Webb and that is a bonus.

"There is a huge amount to play for on Saturday and it will go a long way to deciding the Six Nations.

"It's great to have Rhys back in the squad. He has been training really hard and brings a lot of energy and experience to the team."

Both teams are unbeaten going into Saturday's match, with England boasting a 100% record under new coach Eddie Jones in pursuit of their first Grand Slam since 2003. Wales have beaten Scotland and France after drawing 16-16 with Ireland in their opening game.

Manu Tuilagi has been recalled to the England squad, with the Leicester centre, 24, not having played for England since June 2014 because of a

Premier League clubs have agreed to limit away ticket prices to a maximum of £30 for the next three seasons.

The clubs announced the new deal on Wednesday after unanimously agreeing to the new price cap at their last meeting in February. The new initiative comes after a number of high profile protests against ticket prices in the Premier League.

The league has enjoyed a record average attengroin injury and disciplinary issues. He replaces Alex Goode in the 24-man squad with Northampton prop Kieran Brookes also included.

Eddie Jones will almost certainly stick with the same starting XV that defeated Ireland last month. That would mean a second start for Saracens’ Maro Itoje in the second-row and Ben Youngs staying at scrumhalf ahead of Danny Care.

Retaining Daly also gives Jones the luxury of an extra specialist centre, which would almost certainly ensure Tuilagi is not needed until the second-half.

Within the England dressing-room, either way, the big man’s return will be warmly received.

“Wherever Manu plays, even if he has a bad day, someone will still get taken down or he is going to run through someone,” said the Wasps flanker James Haskell. “Very few players have the ability to do that but Manu is pretty special.

He’s pace, power and strength personified. I have played with him against some of the best teams in the world and he causes everybody trouble.

dance of 96.2 per cent this season but a number of supporter groups have raised concerns about increasing prices, particularly for away supporters.The away ticket cap replaces the existing Away Supporters Initiative a set of travel and ticket subsidies originally introduced by clubs in 2013.

The new cap is set to run for three years and will apply from the start of next season, and run until the end of the 2018/19 season.

6 Nations So Far...

TEAMS STANDINGS

REMAING FIXTURES Saturday 12 March 14:30 Ireland v Italy – Aviva Stadium - ITV 17:00 England v Wales – Twickenham - ITV Sunday 13 March 16:00 Scotland v France – Murrayfield – BBC One Saturday 19 March 15:30 Wales v Italy – Principality Stadium – BBC One 18:00 Ireland v Scotland – Aviva Stadium - ITV 21:00 France v England – Stade de France – BBC One

Opening Encounter Torrevieja Cricket Club play their first match of the new season tomorrow as they entertain La Manga in a friendly. The wickets will be pitched at 11.00 am at the athletics track in the

Torrevieja Sports City complex. Torrevieja are hoping for a winning campaign after some intensive winter training and two new players joining the squad. Spectators will be made very welcome

as is anyone wishing to join the club. Ages range from 11 years to 70 and ability ranges from “never played before” to very good! Further details can be obtained from Torrevieja-cricket.com.

Follow the action on TKO FM 90.8fm & 91.9fm - Listen Live Tko.fm

Inter Schools Bowled Over!

A prestigious interschools cricket tournament was hosted recently by the Phoenix International School on the Orihuela Costa which was organised

by Neil Brook on behalf of Cricket España. Besides the Phoenix school, teams were entered from the El Limonar International

School, Murcia; Laude Newton College, Elche; and Kings College, Murcia. It was the first time these four schools had been brought together in a head to head cricket competition that was evenly contested, with the scoring and umpiring done by some visiting students from the Norlington School

for Boys, who had made the trip over to the Costa Blanca, courtesy of Essex County Cricket Club, were on hand to keep score and act as umpires as the games commenced thus enhancing their own coaching and leadership skills.

In the end each school had something to celebrate,

with Kings College taking the coveted primary trophy beating Phoenix by only a very small margin. Kings got a winning double in close encounter for the secondary title with El Limonar, and finally Phoenix were just pipped at the post by Laude Newton College who got the girls trophy.

Local Rugby Roundup Local Rugby team San Javier Squalos lost their cup tie last weekend at Murcia, 21 points to nil, in a brave performance especially as they were only able to raise 14 players for the fixture.

It’s a massive Saturday for the Squalos women’s side as they go to Lorca tomorrow afternoon to play Murcia University in the women’s play-off final which will kick off at 5.30 pm.

44

Ivie Davies on Golf

Friday 11th March 2016

Golf’s Top Ten Best Feelings From the nailed drive to the post-round pint, the chip-in to the fresh leather glove – these are just some of the reasons we keep coming back to this often cruel game.

Golf can be cruel sometimes: It builds and then dashes your hopes and dreams on a regular basis without a care for the psychological damage it’s inflicting. But you keep returning for more, something draws you back. Why would we be attracted to something that punishes us so? It’s because those regular feelings of hurt are dwarfed by those rare, yet astonishingly powerful, good feelings that golf is able to elicit. Here we take a look at some of those serotonin-inducing moments that make it all worthwhile. In no particular order, these are ten of the best feelings in golf: 1 – THE NAILED DRIVE Is there any better feeling in golf than catching a drive absolutely spot on, out of the screws?

When your swing is in perfect time and the ball

comes pinging out of the very middle of the driver and flies dead straight on the ideal trajectory, you can’t help but smile. For maximum smug enjoyment you need to be playing with kindhearted partners prepared to be economical with the truth when describing your effort. “I’ve never seen anyone so far down on that hole,” … “He only had a wedge left for his second!”

2 – THE LAST-MINUTE FIND You’ve sprayed one into the rough but it doesn’t look too thick down there and you’re pretty sure you’ll find it, but you play a provisional just in case (as you always should.)

On arrival in the vicinity of ball one, there’s no sign.

“What? Where the **** has it gone? We should be able to see it here easily.” After nearly five minutes of searching, you’re about to give up and go play the provisional when something catches your eye. You lift a leaf and there it is; sitting

nicely and affording you a shot to the green.

Hallelujah – there is a God! 3 – THE AMBER NECTAR There are few moments to match the first sip of your post-round beer on a day when you have managed to secure a lift to the links. It really doesn’t matter how you’ve played – you’re not designated so can have a couple of these.

4 – THE CRUCIAL PUTT Standing over a fivefooter on the final green you can feel sweat on the palms and your heart racing. This putt is to keep your handicap. If you hole this putt you will enjoy the rest of your weekend, if you don’t; you won’t. Stand away, compose yourself. Now back to it; “Ohoho this is a big one Billy… Don’t let me down Billy.” The putter goes back and through, the ball starts on a good line and tracks into the centre of the cup.

The feeling of relief and elation is so great that

you have to choke back tears.

5 – WINNING A MATCH / POSTING YOUR BEST SCORE When you go up against an opponent you’re evenly matched with and get the better of them in a closely fought contest, the feeling of self-satisfaction and pride is tough to beat.

Likewise, with a scorecard in your hand, when you have done better than you ever have before.

6 – THE PRISTINE GOLF GLOVE You’re about to play a big round – the Club Champs or the knockout final for instance – so you’ve decided to splash out. You’ve popped into the pro-shop and grabbed a new white leather glove. Standing on the first tee you break it out of its packet and put it on with a Zorro-like flourish. You stretch your fingers to smooth the perfect cabretta leather and feel invincible – this will be your day!

7 – NOT OUT

You’ve carved one badly from the tee and you know the outcome – there’s out of bounds over there and it’s headed straight for it. You’re already walking to your bag for a provisional, but you throw one last glance down the hole, hoping for a miracle. How good is that rare feeling when you get one? The ball has struck the trunk of a lone tree outside the course boundary and ricocheted so violently, that it’s come right back onto the fairway. Aaaahh – just as I planned it.

8 – ZIPPING IT BACK Getting the ball to spin back is the preserve of elite golfers but, just occasionally circumstances allow the average hacker to get a bit of “Tour action.”

The greens are soft, you have a good lie and its 90 metres downhill to the putting surface. You strike the wedge shot cleanly and watch it fly towards its target. It lands 15 feet beyond the cup and you have a perfect view as it engages

reverse and zips back towards the hole. Yes, I am that good.

9 – THE CHIP-IN For most average golfers, a missed green inevitably means at least one dropped shot. Trying to get the ball close from short range with a lofted club is one of the toughest things in golf and it’s the ability to do this regularly that separates the very best from the alsorans. When you chip a ball stone dead it feels amazing – what a save!

But, when it rolls out perfectly and drops into the hole, you’ve struck gold.

You’re two shots better off than you thought you would probably be… And you don’t have to get the putter out!

10 – THE HOLE-IN-ONE Saving the best for last – nothing can top an ace.

You have played a hole of golf perfectly and nobody could have beaten you on it. The feeling of excitement when you see, or realise, you’ve just scored an ace is fantastic (Apart from the bar bill!).

KNOW YOUR RULES QUESTION

Jim fails to determine his handicap before the match what is the ruling?

ANSWER There is no penalty if players fail to determine one another's handicaps before starting a match. If this results in one of them not receiving a handicap stroke at a hole at which he is entitled to receive one, the hole stands as played. (Rule 6-2a/1).

TITTER ON THE TEE “I can't believe that you've been visiting prostitutes for sex," screamed my wife. "I'm really disappointed."

"You can hardly blame me," I answered. "It's not like I was getting any from you.”

"Well that's your fault," she replied. “You never told me you were willing to pay for it”

The Courier Sport

45

Friday 11th March 2016

Torry’s Away Woes

Barclays Premier League Saturday 12 March

13:45 Norwich City v Manchester City 16:00 Bournemouth v Swansea City 16:00 Stoke City v Southampton

Sunday 13 March

17:00 Aston Villa v Tottenham Hotspur

Monday 14 March

ORIHUELA CF 3 CD TORREVIEJA 0

21:00 Leicester City v Newcastle United

Sky Bet Championship Saturday 12 March 13:30 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00

Blackburn Rovers v Leeds United Bolton Wanderers v Preston North End Cardiff City v Ipswich Town Fulham v Bristol City Huddersfield Town v Burnley Hull City v MK Dons Nottingham Forest v Sheffield Wednesday Queens Park Rangers v Brentford Rotherham United v Derby County

Sunday 13 March 14:15 Wolverhampton Wanderers v Birmingham City 16:30 Charlton Athletic v Middlesbrough

Tuesday 15 March CD Torrevieja has conceded 28 goals in 28 games this season, but six of those have come in their last two outings, knocking the stuffing out of their slim hopes of making it into the promotion play off’s.

However, the biggest problem is at the other end, with a poor 29 goals netted in those same 28 contests.

When it comes down to it, Torry have been outfought by other teams and their opponents hammer home their chances, whilst Torry spurn opportunity after opportunity.

The wheels were wobbly the previous weekend in Crevillente, but they came off the bus in Orihuela last Sunday with yet another

three-nil defeat. Once more Torry were the architects of their own demise, gifting the ball close to their own penalty box to Raul, who then duly despatched it into the net past a hapless Miguel.

This was in the third minute and boosted the belief of the hosts who began to play attractive expansive football, threatening on every attack.

Torry played their usual patient passing game but failed to trouble the ponitailed Emilio in the home goal.

Torry's attacks promised much with Higon making great runs into space but rarely found by his colleagues. Lewis Allen was a

live menace down the middle but when it mattered he had little by way of immediate support. He enjoyed one glorious opportunity in the second half, but Emilio closed him down quickly and he failed to deliver the killer strike. Sanchez returned to the line up and linked play well.

At half time, Martin was replaced by Matej, after sustaining two broken fingers. In a ten minute spell, Orihuela had put the match beyond Torry. A fast break down the right wing was matched in pace with a fierce low delivery met

by Juanjo at the near post and he swept it home despite the close attention of the Torry defence. Then

a magnificent free kick completed the scoreline, Theo arrowing it home into the top corner of the net.

Orihuela looked rampant at this stage and with a quarter of the game to go, seemed as though they might emulate their five-nil victory of last year. Torry kept them at bay and no further misery was added.

With ex-Torry players Ruben and Brani likely to feature in the Elche Ilicitano line up this Sunday, it will prove another interesting contest, even if Torry looks like playing out the remainder of the season in the midtable. The match has a 5.00 pm start at the Vicente Garcia stadium.

Not The Full Monte

CD MONTESINOS 1 CALLOSA DEPORTIVA “B” 2

It wasn’t just the disappointing result that ended Monte’s seven match unbeaten run which featured six victories, but it was the quality of the performance. It was one of the worst home efforts seen for a long time last Sunday which dented Monte’s hopes of getting into the end of season play-off’s, as

they succumbed to a team in the bottom half of the table.

With strikers Macan and Carlos sidelined, it was Wallace who was given the chance to make a name for himself alone upfront and neither he or his colleagues were at their best. Callosa dominated early proceedings, but the home side got

lucky when a bad clearance by the Callosa keeper gave Wallace a simple lob to score easily for the first goal. Callosa were not phased by the early goal and levelled things up after taking a quick free kick which was crossed in for a simple tap in. Wallace then missed a great chance by shooting over the bar, with

Callosa then rubbing salt in the wound when got the lead from another badly defended free kick which produced a free header to put them two-one up at the interval.

The second half was so poor that one supporter was spotted doing a crossword. Callosa unsurprisingly put all in their stock in defending what they got sensing a shock away win but still managed to create several chances. Monte couldn’t get through the Callosa midfield never mind their defence which held strong and the home side lost all interest. The most exciting incident of the second half happened right at the end when Pley was clearly sent tumbling in the area only for the referee to adjudge it was outside the box. The free kick came to nothing which rather neatly summed up Monte’s poor afternoon. They’re away tomorrow (Saturday) at old rivals Benejúzar with a 6.45 pm kick-off.

20:45 Brighton and Hove Albion v Reading 20:45 Hull City v Nottingham Forest 20:45 Ipswich Town v Blackburn Rovers

Scottish Premiership Saturday 12 March

13:30 Partick Thistle v Celtic 16:00 Aberdeen v Kilmarnock 16:00 Dundee v Heart of Midlothian

Spanish La Liga Friday 11 March

20:30 Málaga v Sporting de Gijón

Saturday 12 March

16:00 Barcelona v Getafe 18:15 Celta de Vigo v Real Sociedad 20:30 Atlético de Madrid v Deportivo de La Coruña 22:05 Rayo Vallecano v Eibar

Sunday 13 March 12:00 Levante v Valencia CF 16:00 Sevilla v Villarreal 18:15 Athletic Club v Real Betis 20:30 Las Palmas v Real Madrid

Monday 14 March 20:30 Granada CF v Espanyol

UEFA Europa League Thursday 17 March 18:00 Bayer 04 Leverkusen v Villarreal 18:00 Lazio v Sparta Prague 18:00 Valencia CF v Athletic Club 20:05 Manchester United v Liverpool 20:05 RSC Anderlecht v Shakhtar Donetsk 20:05 Sevilla v FC Basel 20:05 Sporting Braga v Fenerbahçe 20:05 Tottenham Hotspur v Borussia Dortmund

Champions League Tuesday 15 March 20:45 Atlético de Madrid v PSV 20:45 Manchester City v Dynamo Kyiv

Wednesday 16 March 20:45 Barcelona v Arsenal 20:45 FC Bayern Munich v Juventus

The FA Cup Friday 11 March 20:55 Reading v Crystal Palace

Saturday 12 March 18:30 Everton v Chelsea

Sunday 13 March 15:30 Arsenal v Watford 17:00 Manchester United v West Ham United

46

Friday 11th March 2016

Easy Pickings EIBAR 0 BARCELONA 4

Lionel Messi scored twice as Barcelona eased to victory at Eibar on Sunday, which keeps them eight points clear at the top of La Liga, with Atletico Madrid remaining second, and just 10 matches remaining.

"It is evident we are well-positioned in the league, but there are plenty of points to play for and meetings with direct rivals to come," said Barcelona coach Luis Enrique. "I am very happy to see the team evolve and improve without ever losing their ambition."

Barca are at home tomorrow afternoon to Getafe, managed by former Elche boss Fran Escriba.

Seventh Heaven REAL MADRID 7 CELTA VIGO 1 Cristiano Ronaldo scored four second-half goals as Real Madrid thumped Celta Vigo to ease the pressure on boss Zinedine Zidane. Pepe headed Real in front after 41 minutes, before two stunning long-range strikes by Ronaldo - the second from a free-kick - put the home side in control.

Iago Aspas then pulled one back for Celta, but Ronaldo struck two more before substitutes Jese Rodriguez and Gareth Bale completed the scoring.

Even with El Clasico to come, third-placed Real are 12 points behind leaders Barcelona, and travel to Las Palmas on Sunday night.

Play - Off Blow ELCHE 1 LLAGOSTERA 1

Nou Camp Plans

Barcelona have unveiled plans to upgrade the club's Nou Camp stadium to a 105,000 capacity ground.

The Spanish and European champions released a statement on Monday announcing the plans alongside concept images of the four-year upgrade.

The stadium's revamp is set to be led by Japanese architectural company Nikken Sekkei alongside Catalan architects Pascual i Ausió Arquitectes.

The plans, which were selected ahead of six other bids, were chosen by a jury made up of Barcelona members, Catalan based architects and City of Barcelona officials.

A statement released on Barcelona's website read: "The Nikken Sekkei + Pascual i Ausio Arquitectes proposal stands out for being open, elegant, serene, timeless Mediterranean and democratic.

The upgrade, which will reportedly cost in the region of £500m, is expected to be completed in time for the start of the 2021/22 season The Nou Camp, which currently holds around 100,000, is already the largest stadium in Europe, ahead of Wembley and Borussia Dortmund's Signal Iduna Park.

Barcelona are expected to sell stadium's naming rights in order to help fund the new construction.

Zidane Backing Real Madrid head coach, Zinedine Zidane, has said he wants Cristiano Ronaldo to stay at the Bernabeu.

Ronaldo was booed by some fans early in the second half of Saturday's game with Celta Vigo before scoring four goals in 28 minutes.

"I am the coach and I want Cristiano," said Zidane.

"They whistled me and everyone else. It is not questioning the player, it is a fan base that always wants more from their players and that is good for the players to improve and always do well.

"In the end, the fans love the players and that is the most important thing. I always see a full stadium and that says a lot."

Real Progress REAL MADRID 2 ROMA 0 (Agg 4-0)

The Courier Sport

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>> Ibrahimovic fires home A late strike from top scorer Sergio León and a top performance from goalkeeper, Javi Jiménez, spared Elche’s blushes as they rescued a home point against the Segunda division’s bottom side last Saturday.

Llagostera just didn’t look like relegation fodder with the visitors looking positive in an open first half that produced chances for both sides. Elche were more dominant in the second period but fell behind after a defensive misunderstanding between José Ángel and Javi Jiménez allowed Querol to score in the 65th minute. With six minutes remaining, an excellent pass from Espinosa set up León to get the equaliser, but Llagostera then laid siege on the Elche goal, with Jiménez producing a string of fine saves to make sure that the Ilicitanos got a point from a match that they needed to win to keep them in the play-off pack.

Elche now travel to Mirandés tomorrow, who are just above them in the table and realistically cannot afford to lose the encounter.

Ibrahimovic Strikes Cristiano Ronaldo scored his 40th goal of the season as Real reached the Champions League quarterfinals with a 4-0 aggregate victory over Roma on Tuesday. Leading 2-0 from the first leg, Real peppered the visitors' goal, although Edin Dzeko and Mohamed Salah wasted chances for Roma at the Bernabeu. It proved costly as Ronaldo crashed in at the near post before setting up James Rodriguez for an angled finish. Roma hit the post but Real made the last eight for a sixth successive term.

Chelsea put up a fight at Stamford Bridge on Wednesday in the second leg of the Champions League last 16, but class told in the end as the French champions went though, courtesy of winning both games. Their big striker Zlatan Ibrahimovic did the damage again, making the first and scoring the second. After conceding an early goal to Rabiot on 27 minutes, the Blues’ in-form striker Diego Costa did score the equalizer to raise Chelsea hopes and get the crowd going. But when the big Spanish striker limped off on the hour, it seemed as though Guus Hiddink’s heroes heads went down, and PSG came storming back and scored the winner to ensure the French champions deservedly went through.

No rest for the weary, that defeat means Chelsea’s only hope of silverware is in the FA Cup on Saturday against Everton. The London Blues have a good Cup record, and although the Merseyside Blues score goals, the Toffees are highly vulnerable at the back.

John McGregor on Sport

47

Friday 11th March 2016

SENDS BLUES OUT! CHELSEA 1 PARIS-ST.GERMAIN 2 (AGG 2 – 4)

TAKE

!

T A ZL

The Latest Sport Headlines Benfica win at Zenit to reach quarter finals St johnstone beat 10 man Inverness Tuilagi on bench for unchanged England to face wales Liverpool v Man Utd The ‘Mother of all games’ Klopp

CHELSEA T A D E L B HUM

!

E G D I R B

Benitez is Newcastle’s preferred target Racquet firm Head to extend Sharapova deal Mandela was my inspiration - McIlroy Van der Sar to come out retirement for amateur side I am completely clean guy - Nadal

Top ‘N Bottom

from close range in The Champions League tie.

As Chelsea Fail

Meanwhile Guus Hiddink hopes that the injuries sustained by Diego Costa and Eden Hazard during Chelsea's Champions League last-16 second-leg defeat to Paris Saint-Germain do not keep the duo sidelined for any significant length of time. Both players were forced to come off in the second half.

When asked to confirm if the issues sustained by Costa and Hazard were short or longer term, Hiddink said, "We'll see tomorrow. I hope it will not be long-term for Diego. But I must pay my respect to him because he desperately wanted to play. It would have been better even if he would not have started but he wanted to play in this very good game." Pressed to establish exactly what was troubling Costa, the manager added: "Yes, it's a little bit on his tendon. In his hip, in the upper leg. "We knew he was not totally fit. He desperately wanted to play. I must respect that he did what he could and he was not fully fit."

There are five Prem matches over the weekend: three on Saturday and one, Villa v Spurs on Sunday, plus a fascinating finale on Monday!

The Villains are in free fall towards the Championship, the fickle finger of fate pointing everywhere, but Tottenham in second must win to keep their title challenge hopes alive. On Saturday, the top and bottom of the Prem are well-represented, firstly by Norwich v Man City. The Canaries are caught in big trouble, and with leading scorer Sergio Aguero bang in form and leading the Blue Boys well, any other result than a City win is hard to see; that

means more nervy Norwich nail-biting. Both Bournemouth and Swansea seem to have weathered the winter storms, with recent important wins and both provincial clubs look certain to stay up. This match should be exciting though, both teams are attack-minded.

Higher up the table a similar scenario is being played out between Stoke and Sunderland for loftier higher stakes like qualification for Europe.

And finally, folks on Monday, it’s Top versus (nearly) Bottom! In previous times, Leicester v Newcastle would not be significant outside those cities, but this match is

of interest nationally, and the result is key. For the Foxes a win means another big step nearer a sensational Prem title, but for Newcastle another defeat must mean the McClaren man has reached the end of the road. Steve must go, leaving another mug – I mean man – with an outside chance of guiding the Magpies beyond Norwich and nastyneighbours Sunderland to Premier League survival. The chances of that? Rafa Benitez is their alleged main target (see back page). This immense North East club with 50,000 regular loyal supporters are in massive trouble. The situation just cannot go on.

Hamilton could change stance on halo Grey-Thompson quits London 2017 board Dickens - Rigondeaux off over visa issues #rideforolivia tribute goes global Team GB can win 79 medals at Rio 2016 Victoria Williamson: Cyclist 'lucky not to be paralysed' after crash Race leader Michael Matthews won the second stage of Paris-Nice after Nacer Bouhanni was disqualified Geoffrey Boycott is "out of touch" with Yorkshire

Supplied by BBC

ALL TO PLAY

FOR!

T N I O P A HAS !

E V O R P TO

SUPER

s I z e it n e B l e a f Ra Newcastle Target Their Premier League opponents’ early season form has dived disastrously in recent months, indeed Palace are the only Prem team not to have won in 2016; it’s 12 games now since an Eagles’ win. Under experienced Brian McDermott.

Reading are firmly fixed in Championship mid-table, going nowhere, and so for the Royals this match is their Cup Final - and it couldn’t be a better time to face a Premier League team who are suffering, and up against it.

MARIA WAS RAFA TO NEWCASTLE? RECKLESS Maria Sharapova's failed drugs test was "reckless beyond description", according to former World Anti-Doping Agency president Dick Pound. Sharapova, 28, revealed on Monday that she tested positive for the banned substance meldonium in January. A number of sponsors have already distanced themselves from the Russian.

E C N A CH This Saturday sees Everton up against Chelsea competing for an FA Cup semi-final place, with the competition the final opportunity for them to get anything out of the season. The Toffees are driving their loyal fans nuts currently, playing well and scoring goals (Romelu Lukaku now has a club Prem record of 18 and it’s only March). But after playing well and leading matches, the defence has then often caved in late in games, in the process conceding far too many soft goals. Last week in the Prem after going 2 – 0 up against exuberant West Ham at Goodison and (Lukaku!) missing a penalty, the Toffees conceded three in the last 12 minutes to somehow lose both the plot and the match. Poor old Chelsea had a mammoth Champions league defeat by PSG on Wednesday (see over) and must pick themselves up for this one. Will Diego Costa be fit? That could be a crucial factor as the Spaniard limped off on the hour against PSG.

Cabaye

The FA Cup and the Premier League clash confusingly this weekend, so The Courier has sorted it out for you! While the four sixth-round (aka quarterfinals) FA Cup matches take place over a long weekend, mixed in amongst them are several important Prem games (see page 46 & 47). Read on…

The FA Cup kicks off the weekend this Friday night with the only Championship side left in, Reading, at home to Crystal Palace – and it’s at The Madjeski stadium where the Royals must fancy their chances.

LAST

Former Liverpool boss Rafael Benitez is said to be Newcastle United’s preferred choice as manager if they replace Steve McClaren.

Benitez was sacked as manager of Real Madrid in January after only seven months. Sources close to Rafa Benitez claim a three-year deal for him to take charge at Newcastle is currently being discussed.

Y A D N SU

Two huge FA Cup matches dominate this Sunday: Conquerors-of-Hull-at-last, Arsenal take on the dark horses of Watford, and anything could happen.

Although the Gunners are the reigning FA Cup holders (OK Gooners, for two years running, yawn…) their up and down form is worrying with recent defeats to the likes of Swansea, Manchester United and Barcelona (!). After a fantastic first Prem season, the Hornets are sitting safely but unspectacularly in 13th place, and with no ‘Arsenal-type’ problems, Watford have absolutely nothing to lose but Arsene’s army have. Later on Sunday those same Happy Hammers, who are having such a sensational season stride strongly into a stadium that used to terrify visitors, but sadly doesn’t today. Old Trafford is a much-changed place these days, anyone is in with a chance of beating the Red Devils. West Brom were the latest to take LVG’s men down and bring back the same question: when is the big Dutchman going, and more importantly - who will be his successor? The ‘Theatre of Dreams’ has seen some nightmares this season, but no kidding, this result means a lot to both teams: Game on!

THE COURIER No.1 for SPORT! All the action p 44-47