The Courier Edition 247

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Friday 30th October 2015 www.thecourier.es Friday www.thecourier.es Friday 6th November 13th

WELCOME HONOUR ALEX TRELINSKI

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x-President of Samaritans in Spain, Chris

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AMBASSADOR PRESENTS MEDAL

Sumter, came back to Spain for a special date with the British

Ambassador, Simon Manley:- namely to pick up her British Empire Medal, which was awarded to her in this year’s Queen’s Birthday Honours for services to the English-speaking community in Spain. Chris took the limelight at the new Samaritans drop-in centre at Punta Prima as she got her BEM from Simon Manley at a special investiture ceremony. C h r i s had spent 20 years living and working abroad, and when she retired to live back in England earlier this year, she was pleasantly sur-

prised to get a call from the Ambassador’s office in Madrid to tell her about the award. Seven years ago Chris was one of the early movers in the newly formed Samaritans in Spain, and within two years she had become their President. She says that she sees her BEM not just as recognition for all the work she has done, but also in appreciation of all those involved in the Samaritans, both in Spain, the UK and around the world, and as a recognition of all those carers all over the world who offer so much to others without question.

BABY ABUSED

two month old baby is in Vega Baja Hospital after being allegedly mistreated by his parents, a young Spanish couple in Orihuela City. A passer-by saw the baby’s

father hitting the child outside in the Los Huertos area of the city on Monday as he was ostensibly changing its nappy. The witness immediately called the authorities

with National Police rushing to the scene, with the couple being taken into custody. The child had a series of bruises on it which suggested systematic abuse, with the

Children’s Office now handling the case, as prosecutors try to decide whether it should be looked after a relative or placed into the care of social services.

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News

Friday 13th November 2015

Larger Motorway

Time To Remember

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Plans to turn the A-7 motorway between Crevillente and Orihuela into a three-lane highway are to go a step further some seven years after central government budget cuts put the project onto the back-burner. 70 million euro will be invested into expanding the 17 kilometre section of the AlicanteMurcia route with the Development Ministry now ordering public inquiries affecting the municipalities

of Albatera, Cox, Callosa de Segura, Granja de Rocamora, Orihuela, Redován and San Isidro, with several hundred landowners having a month to submit their views on the proposed work. Elsewhere, the process has also started for converting a one and a half kilometre stretch of the Elche-Santa Pola CV865 road into a dula-carriageway next year, with around 60 plots of land set to be compulsorily purchased.

Record Breaker Over one million people used Alicante-Elche airport in October in another recordbreaking month, with nine point three million passengers coming into the facility at El Altet over the first ten months of 2015. That means

cumulatively just over four percent more travellers have arrived at the airport so far this year compared to 2014, and October’s figures show a bumper six point three per cent hike compared to twelve months earlier.

Catalan Chaos

Pro-independence leaders in Catalunya have vowed to press ahead with plans to break away from Spain, despite a decision by the Constitutional Court on Wednesday to suspend the secession process. Catalunya's regional parliament on Monday passed a motion to kick start a breakaway, stating an aim of independence within 18 months, and giving 30 days to start legislation on a Catalan constitution, treasury and social security system. Catalan Vice-President Neus Munte said it was the political will of the regional government to carry on with

Poppies were worn with pride over the last few days across the area with two special commemorations organised by local branches of the Royal British Legion in honour of British servicemen and women who have served their country. Last Sunday, on Remembrance Day, the Orihuela Costa RBL held their annual service for the eighth successive year at

Mil Palmeras church, attended by dignitaries including the British ViceConsul, Lloyd Milan; Pilar de la Horadada Mayor, Ignacio Ramos; Orihuela international councillor, Sofia Alvarez; Guardia Civil officer and creator of the N-332 Facebook page, Francisco Morales; and Nigel Halls, President of the RBL, Spain District North. Afterwards they laid garlands of poppies out-

side the chapel, and then witnessed a parade to the Olympia Restaurant. Then on Wednesday, Armistice Day was commemorated at La Siesta church in the annual service organised by the Torrevieja Branch of the Royal British Legion. Torrevieja Mayor, Jose Manuel Dolon led a contingent of local council representatives and laid a memorial garland.

plans for independence in 18 months. Spain's government earlier appealed to the Constitutional Court to intervene. The court warned Catalan leaders they needed to comply with the order. "If they fail to comply with the suspension, they may commit disobedience," read the ruling by the Madridbased high court. Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy called the Catalan move a "blatant disregard for the state's institutions". "We're talking about the defence of an entire country. They are trying to liquidate the unity of a nation with more than five centuries of history," he said.

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News

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Friday 13th November 2015

The Un-Social Network

A 15-year-old San Fulgencio boy has been arrested by the National Police for bullying children through social network internet sites, including demanding explicit sexual pictures of youngsters which he tried to obtain by issuing threats. Agents seized a computer, a tablet and a mobile phone in their

raid on the teenager’s home at the end of October. The National Police got involved after two children complained that they were being harassed by a person that they had been chatting to via a social network. One of the youngsters agreed to send explicit personal pictures

with the 15-year-old threatening to post them if his supply of fresh material dried up. The teenager’s mother was also arrested but was later released after questioning, though charges may still be brought against her. No indication was given of the family’s nationality.

Runaway Bus A driverless bus careered down a steep Algorfa street last week, hitting five cars, before it came to a halt in a citrus grove. The incident happened last Thursday afternoon (November 5th) as the vehicle's handbrake apparently failed when it was parked up on Calle Comunidad Valenciana before starting a somewhat unscheduled journey. A large crane had to be brought in to get the bus out of the vegetation with Algorfa mayor, Manuel Ros (pictured), saying that it was fortunate that the inci-

Starbucks to offer free college for veteran employees' families. Obama calls Myanmar president, endorses election as Suu Kyi eyes majority.

dent happened before five in the afternoon, which meant that there were no school children in the area.

Quick Withdrawal

EU leaders press on with effort to slow migrant arrivals. Sweden defends border control clampdown. Hong Kong tycoon buys daughter $48 mn diamond. South Korean court upholds life sentence for sunken ferry captain. Kurdish forces launch battle to retake Iraq's Sinjar. World stock markets struggling because of weak oil prices.

Big Win

Greek unions launch first general strike against leftist government. Italy police say 17 arrested in European antiterror operation.

Over 60 British people that saw their dreams of a holiday or retirement home shattered back in 2010 are to get over two million euro of compensation after a ruling from an Alicante court. A class action saw the group wanting to recover their pre-paid sums that were going to be used for property at the infamously unconstructed Fortuna Hills Golf Resort in Murcia, which was going to be built by the Orihuela based Promotions Eurohouse company. The firm went into volun-

tary liquidation in March 2010, with the budding home-owners left with no homes as well as being out of pocket. They took legal action against the Banco Popular who was the financial guarantor, with the judge ordering refunds of between 34 and 88 thousand euro. Two other banks were cleared but the ruling could still be appealed by the Banco Popular. The banks that had loaned the money to the main developer of the site tried to claw back their money

by seizing what turned out to be largely worthless land(due to building permissions not being obtained) as well as what there were of the partcompleted houses. It’s believed that Promotions Eurohouse owe the best part of 30 million euro to local businesses and home buyers. The development would have accommodated the best part of four thousand properties had it ever been completed, but the recession and property slump put paid to all the ambitious plans.

Thieves used explosives to try to blast their way into a Los Montesinos bank in the early hours of last Sunday morning, destroying the ATM machine and causing substantial internal damage, including a partial roof collapse. Neighbours next to the Santander branch on the town's main Avenida del Mar were woken up just after 5.00am

by the noise. The Guardia Civil from San Miguel are leading the investigation after one explosive was placed on the cash dispenser whilst a second detonation happened in the entrance, with the erstwhile thieves apparently escaping with nothing. Staff reported for duty as normal on Monday to help clear up the mess.

Long Stretches A court in Santiago de Compostela yesterday sentenced the adoptive parents of Asunta Basterra, a 12year-old child who was found dead in 2013, to 18 years in prison. Rosario Porto and Alfonso Basterra were found guilty of murdering the child a fortnight ago.

Asunta’s parents were the only suspects in the case from the beginning. An autopsy showed that Asunta was asphyxiated with a soft object after being drugged with a heavy dose of lorazepam, the anxiety medication taken by her mother.

Strike by cabin crew continue at Lufthansa. Putin calls for investigation of Russian doping allegations. Thailand returns rescued orangutans to Indonesia. Australian Apple store accused of racism after black teens ejected. Vatican investigates two journalists over leaks scandal. U.N. climate deal must unlock private funding for forests: experts say. Boy, 8, beat baby to death to stop her crying: US police.


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Woman Shot

Nice To Be Back

A 49-year old man has been arrested by the National Police for allegedly shooting his exwife in the back of her leg in an El Altet house. The husband was detained in the San Anton area of Elche on Tuesday with the woman being taken for treatment to Elche General Hospital.

Weevil Call An Elche councillor has called for the European Commission to do more in fight against the red palm weevil. Environment councillor Antonio Garcia says that a Europe-wide approach is needed against the palm tree killer, which is especially problematic in the Elche and Orihuela areas. Garcia wants proper guidelines issued across EU member states and more action to stop the pest.

Pet Project Almoradi wants all local pet owners to register their pets on a municipal census. The council's animal welfare department want all dog and cat owners to provide details to the local police so that lost pets can be returned to their owners more easily as well as making sure that they have the appropriate vaccinations. Registration is free and is also seen as way of dealing with increasing numbers of abandoned animals, though it remains unclear as to how the council can get all local pet owners to comply with their registration wishes.

Crime Falls

Crime is continuing to fall in Alicante Province according to the latest official figures which cover the first nine months of 2015. There's been a four thousand drop in reported incidents through to the end of September, compared to the same period in 2014, which means that 71 thousand crimes have been logged so far this year, a two point eight percent fall. Home robberies are down by 11 percent whilst the category of violent crime has seen a six and a half percent drop. The only blight on the statistics is a near-doubling of homicides in the area from 12 last year, to 23 in 2015.

News

Friday13th November 2015

A 26-year-old woman who had been living with her husband on the TurkeySyria border was arrested as her plane landed in Málaga last Friday on sus-

picion of being a member of the Islamic State terror group. The Spanish national had been under an arrest warrant before she left the country, issued by the National Court in Madrid. Intelligence services say the woman, who has not been named, had not returned to the Costa del Sol to carry out terrorist attacks. She had become disillusioned with life in Syria and with her marriage, and decided to return home. But she was arrested when she did so and has been remanded in custody.

Broad Minded

Thousands of visitors had their eyes well and truly opened last weekend with the fifth Erotica festival at the Alicante Exhibition

Centre. Over 200 stands and 50 "performers" formed the backbone of the event, with all tastes and curiosities catered for.

All In The Family

Spain's first-ever livedonor liver transplant between a grandmother and grandchild was carried out in an Andalucia hospital over the summer, and the youngster is said to be recovering very well – despite having been given just months to live. Details were only made public about Francisca Fuentes, 55, who donated part of her own liver to her one-year-old grandson Juan José who was born with blocked bile ducts, a deformity which gradually

deteriorates and which is the main cause of a child needing a transplant. Only two similar cases have been recorded in Spain of organ transplants being received by the children's grandparents, but in both cases, they were live kidney donations since a person can live normally with only one healthy kidney. In the case of Francisca and her grandson, the baby was only nine months old when the transplant was carried out

in June, and is now 14 months old. Dr Javier Briceño, treating the infant at the Reina Sofía University Hospital in Córdoba says the transplant is not the first of its type in the world, but nearly, and is a pioneering operation in Spain – although these days, donations between relatives are becoming more common. Francisca only had to be in hospital for four days, although Juan José was not discharged for another two weeks

Forbidden Fruit

General Removed

The Spanish government has dismissed former top army chief, General Julio

Rodriguez, who recently announced plans to stand as a candidate in next month's general election for the left-wing anti-austerity party Podemos. Rodriguez was removed from his position as Chairman of the Royal and Military Order of Saint Hermenegild. The government said he had violated his duty of neutrality with his statements following his Podemos announcement.

A Load Of Croc

The Guardia Civil have recovered three tonnes of stolen pomegranates and returned them to local farmers as part of their autumn sweep of fruit rustlers looking to take an illegal share of the harvest period. The

Guardia's rural crime team, ROCA, based in Torrevieja have made 15 arrests over the last couple of months in San Isidro, Albatera and La Murada. A recent case in the Orihuela municipality saw a whole gang being nabbed

on an Orihuela area farm, with one of them escaping and nearly running over a police officer as he fled in his vehicle. The ROCA tracked him down and put him in front of an Orihuela judge.

Double Death

A new species of crocodile from over 75 million years ago has been discovered in a prehistoric dig in the province of Cuenca. Archaeologists working on the Lo Hueco site in the centre-eastern province, which dates back to the High Cretaceous Period, found the fossilised skull of

a crocodile with two-inchlong teeth, disproportionately large when compared with the size of the head. It has been named the L o h u e c o s u c h u s Megadontos – 'Lo Hueco' after the name of the site, suchus meaning 'crocodile', dontos for teeth and mega for large.

A mother and daughter were shot dead on Sunday by the latter's father and the former's ex-husband, who is said to have had an injunction preventing him from approaching his family He was arrested as he tried to flee the town of Llíria, inland from Valencia city, where the women lived. Police had cordoned off the area after the ex-wife and daughter, both of gypsy origin, were shot in their home, but it took a matter of minutes before the killer, also a gypsy, was caught.


News

Friday13th November 2015

Health Battle

The Valencian government is refusing to stop providing healthcare to foreigners without residence permits, defying the wishes of Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy and a Constitutional Court ruling. President Ximo Puig (PSOE) announced as soon as he took up office along with his coalition partner Mònica Oltra (Compromís) that the national government's ban on free public healthcare for undocumented migrants would immediately be lifted. He has started returning healthcare entitlement registration cards – known as SIP cards – to all foreign nationals who had theirs confiscated after the ban was launched in September 2012. The Valencia administration has instructed all health centres and hospitals in Alicante Province to continue treating all patients in full no matter which country they are

from or whether or not they are working. Asked by reporters whether or not this could be considered 'disobedience' or even 'sedition', Puig replied that there are 'ways and means' of continuing with full healthcare for everyone legally and assured that 'not one day would pass' without those who need it being treated. He has also met with charities providing support to immigrants. A legal appeal is being prepared with Puig insisting:"Nobody can prevent us

Rough Waters A number of yacht clubs and marinas that are operating without the necessary concessionary licenses across the Costa Blanca have been given a year’s amnesty to get themselves sorted out. The Valencia Region’s

Department of Housing and Works says that some clubs have not had the right documentation for 15 years, with marinas at Dehesa de Campoamor (Orihuela Costa) and Torre de la Horadada named on the Southern Costa Blanca.

The Budget Is Blasted

Ex-Torrevieja mayor, Eduardo Dolon, who was ousted at last May's elections, has rubbished the draft council budget for next year, saying that money allocated to the area by the coalition

Valencian Government showed a "contempt for Torrevieja". The opposition leader and Partido Popular chief says that funds allocated for flood prevention work on the N-332 have been slashed by 150 thousand euro and criticised that no mention had been made of funding building work for the Amanecer school. Meanwhile another PP councillor, Hita Riera, has criticised the council leadership for doing nothing about an increased presence during the summer months of illegal street hawkers. She claimed that that legal traders were unhappy about at the unlicensed competition that was more apparent this year compared to the summer of 2014.

from offering solidarity and aid," hinting that he may be considering tactics which classify medical care to those without a valid visa as some form of 'humanitarian assistance' or 'charity' to enable it to continue. It is also thought that an appeal may have been lodged partly to give the region a stay of grace until after the national elections on December 20th, in the hope that a government other than the current reigning Partido Popular will get into power.

House Sales On The Up Spanish housing sales rose by 13.8 percent in September when compared with the same month of a year earlier, according to the National Statistical Office (INE). A total of 30,711 deals were registered in September, the INE said, with sales of second-hand houses increasing by 36 percent to a total of 24,600 purchases and sales of new houses falling by 31.3 percent to 6,111 purchases when compared with September, 2014. Property sales have been going up for 13 consecutive months on a yearon-year basis. In the first nine months of the year house sales rose by 12.2 percent, with sales of new houses decreasing by 35.3 percent and sales of second-hand houses rising by 42.9 percent. On a monthon-month basis, housing sales rose by four point six percent from August to September.

Ferraris Deal Rejected By Goverment The Spanish government has rejected a bid to sell two luxury Ferraris, donated to the state by the ex-king Juan Carlos. The monarch had received the cars as a gift from the officials in the United Arab Emirates. The authorities received only one offer for the two Ferraris, and it was bellow half of the minimum price of 695 thousand euro for both cars, according to the Spanish finance ministry. Both FF (F151) models, one black and the other silver-grey, were given to Juan Carlos in 2011, during a diplomatic trip to the Gulf. The monarch donated them to the state in 2012, and suggested they should be up for sale this year to raise money for the economy.

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Up For The Cups! Spain’s World Cup winning and European Championship trophies have been doing a grand tour of Alicante Province ahead of tonight’s friendly match at the Rico Pérez stadium in Alicante City against England. The cups visited places like Torrevieja and Orihuela with eager fans of all nationalities happy to have photos taken with the famous silverware in the background.

Sexism Row A Valencia court is set to rule as to whether La Unión Cement is sexist in its advertising campaigns. The Institute of Women, part of the government´s Ministry of Equality has brought the challenge over what they say are sexist promotional videos featuring scantily clad women to advertise cement. Prosecutors want the cement company to stop all allegedly sexist advertising

and has also asked the court to ban any further usage of the images in question. The defence has argued that the images belong to an old campaign that is no longer running. Gender violence laws allow courts to "bring injunctions against advertising that uses degrading images of women" in terms established by the General Laws on Advertising.

Jealous Guy

Station Door Open

A fit of jealous rage led an Elche man to a systematic period of physical abuse against his girlfriend after two male doctors presided over the birth of their son in 2013. The 34year-old man met her in May 2012 after chatting via the internet and within three months she was pregnant with his child. They went to live in Hondón de los Frailes, and then Elche, with Pedro

Drivers In A Jam Drivers in Spain spend an average of 17 hours a year caught up in traffic jams according to a survey by driving app, Wazypark. Barcelona motorists were delayed for up for 25 hours on average in 2014, whilst the figures for Madrid showed a yearly average of 21 hours. Spaniards also spend 16 percent of their fuel looking for a parking space at an annual cost to motorists of just under four billion euro.

News

Friday 13th November 2015

An Elche police station jail cell door still hasn't been fixed a year on after a prisoner went berserk and broke it after he was taken into custody over an accident on the N-332.

Elche council say that the cost of the repair should be born centrally, whilst the justice ministry says it is a local responsibility, and so the impasse continues.

Enrique being present at his son's birth in June 2013, with two male physicians attending, which somehow triggered a whole raft of violent incidents against her. His partner told the Alicante Provincial Court that on her return home, she suffered daily physical and sexual abuse fuelled by apparent jealousy involving the doctors, with her boyfriend kicking her

and beating her with sticks and other objects, as well as not allowing her to leave her house. The court sentenced Pedro Enrique to five years behind bars finding him guilty of physical abuse, but clearing him of sexual abuse and illegal detention charges. He must also stay away from her for six years and pay her 10 thousand euros in compensation.

Big Spenders An American, who noticed four thousand euro taken from her credit card in an Alicante City jeweller, has helped to blow the whistle on two big-spending conmen who used cloned credit cards to splash out on luxury items. She complained to the US authorities, with the National Police arresting the fraud-

sters in Murcia and Malaga, One of the men was said to be a specialist in credit card cloning who would operate around the country. A recent spending spree included a visit to an electronics shop in Murcia where eight thousand euro of purchases including computers and iPads were made.

Quick Brakers A ten car pile-up on the A-70 road in the Elche area close to the turning for Alicante-Elche airport caused jams of around five kilometres last Friday morning. Nobody was seriously injured though authorities have speculated that the incident may have been caused by speeding cars braking suddenly to avoid being caught over the limit by a speed radar camera.

More To Come As demolition work continues on six illegal buildings on Tabarca Island (pictured). Alicante council has confirmed that they are

planning to pull down 11 other homes there. The council's structural planning department says the homes were built without permission 15 years ago.

Women’s Rights Tens of thousands of protesters, including activists from FEMEN and Podemos, took to the streets of Madrid last Sunday to voice their protests against domestic violence and discrimination against women. At least 380 regional and 70 state-run feminist organizations as well as members from Spanish main political parties, trade unions and non-governmental groups, took part in the rally.


Dave Silver

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Friday 13th November 2015

Hop Along Now And Come Greet A Stranger

IT was action stations at the pub the other evening when a stranger walked in. While Dave the barman plastered a sickly welcoming grin across his features, we pub regulars scarpered to safety at the far end of the bar, dragging a semicomatose Ol' Red Eyes behind us. Dave the barman went into his stranger spiel about the range of exotic beers and sophisticated spirits on offer while we pubsters drew straws to decide which of us would quiz the newcomer as to his intent. As usual, Murphy's Law kicked in and the person who drew the short straw was Ol' Red Eyes. We tried gently to slap him awake but our former leader and mentor was in no fit state to even retain hold of the short straw,

never mind walk across the room and talk to someone. So we lifted the ancient codger onto a stool, secured him by his trouser braces to a redundant beer pump, and held a second draw. 'Murphy's Law strikes yet again,' murmured Indoor Lou as this time yours truly (that's me) drew the short straw. Breathing in deeply to calm my nerves, I slowly approached the newcomer. I don't know how it happened -- maybe it was the pretend steady walk -- but I had a senior moment and heard myself saying: 'Howdy, stranger. I hope you're not packin' a sixgun. Otherwise, I'll have to ask you to leave town.' There was a long, long pause as every person in the pub stared at me. Even Daft Barry, who'd been known

himself to come out with lots of crazy stuff, looked astounded. With mouth hanging open, the lad asked: 'What was THAT all about?' -- although it was hard to understand what he was saying what with his gob being all agape. As for the stranger, he looked mightily shocked, too. And then the poor bloke burst into tears. 'I'm so sorry for bawling,' wailed the distressed fellow as I swiftly handed him a clean handkerchief with which to wipe his streaming eyes. 'Just look what you've done to that poor chap!' Dave the barman admonished me, although he was probably more miffed that the newcomer hadn't yet purchased a drink. 'That Dave Silver has no

right to intimidate my customers,' Dave the barman ranted on. 'He's acting like an asylum escapee who's convinced that he's a halfbaked Hopalong Cassidy or a batty Bat Masterson. 'Sorry' I mumbled. 'I don't know what came over me. I wanted just to say hello but it came out like that. The dialogue must have come from a Western film I saw once -or possibly twice.' At which point our esteemed mentor and leader Andromeda Arkwright marched into the hostelry and studied the scene which met her surprised eyes. 'Why is Dave the barman glaring at Dave Silver?' she asked. 'Why is a stranger crying into a handkerchief? And most puzzling of all, why is Ol' Red Eyes fast asleep while sitting bolt upright on a bar stool with his braces wrapped around a beer pump?' After explanations were given, Andromeda turned to the stranger and said kindly: 'I think it would expedite matters if you told us your story. All that we know is that your initials are DS because it says so on the corner of the handkerchief you've been blowing your nose into.' 'How could I be DS when my name is Ed Thomas?' asked the puzzled stranger as I snatched back my monogrammed hanky in a desperate attempt to avoid

any further complications. 'Ed Thomas. Wow!' whispered Daft Barry. 'I wouldn't mind having one of his hankies with the initials on. I could add it to my ET collection.' The newcomer seated himself on a stool and commenced to clear up the mystery. 'My story is this: I was manager at the town's Trocadero Cinema for many years until the building was closed and demolished. Now every time I hear a snatch of dialogue -- such as "Howdy, stranger" -- it reminds me of the old movies and I remember the wonderful time I spent in a job that I adored. 'The tears that I shed are not of terror at being confronted by some mentallyunbalanced cowboy fan. No, I weep purely out of cinematic nostalgia.' 'And the reason you are visiting this public house?' Andromeda Arkwright asked soothingly. The stranger sighed. 'Because an acquaintance told me that the people who gather in this establishment remind him of those old madcap comedies starring Laurel & Hardy or the Marx Brothers or the Keystone Cops or any other movie folk who made a career out of acting daft.' 'Hmmm,' hmmed Andromeda Arkwright. 'I

happen currently to be trying to turn this rough group of bizarre individuals into a polished unit of erudite intellectuals. But I'm afraid your description happens to be closer to the truth as we speak -- or at least as Dave Silver speaks.' Andromeda turned to Dave the barman. 'Drinks all round, mein host! Let us provide our new friend here with a traditional pub welcome.' And she plonked a wad of tenners onto the bar top. The hostelry erupted into pleasurable chaos. Even Fag Ash Bill dimped the latest of his never-ending supply of cigarettes on the wall outside and entered the pub (legally) to partake of a free pint of Dave's watered ale. Indeed, Dave the barman was ecstatic as he pocketed Andromeda's cash and worked the pumps like they'd never been worked before. Which was probably why there was a sudden resounding TWANG as the aforementioned pair of braces snapped and the sleeping figure of Ol' Red Eyes was catapulted off his stool and into the lap of our seated stranger who had finally stopped weeping. Ol' Red Eyes opened one rheumy peeper, stared hard at the newcomer and remarked: 'Are we perchance related? Your eyes seem to be as red as mine.'


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News

Friday 13th November 2015

Wrong ID A 36-year-old man has been arrested by Pilar de la Horadada police on suspicion of driving around with a fake UK driving license. Officers running a check point in their fight against rural crime spotted a car try to reverse away from it and a chase then started until a patrol car intercepted him. An inspection of documents led to the officers noticing the man’s UK license which they thought was not genuine, and that was confirmed later by an expert.

Bricks And Mortar Spanish nationals have over nine billion euro in property abroad, not all of it invested in residential homes, according to the latest figures by tax authorities. Assets outside of Spanish territory declared via Form 720 – compulsory for any tax resident in Spain who has 50 thousand euro or more in cash, savings or bricks and mortar abroad – show citizens, rather than expatriates, own property in nearly 150 countries. France, where the highest number of premises owned by Spaniards is found, tops the list at 1.73bn euro, and next comes the UK, with nearly 1.38bn euro in property.

Hash Smashed 31 drug traffickers have been arrested in the Murcia and Malaga regions in a major National Police operation. Seven tonnes of hashish was seized as the authorities shut down a

sophisticated network involving Spaniards and North Africans that involved boats, vehicles, and warehouse used to hold and then distribute drugs across Europe.

Secret Agency

A major operation targeting money laundering has led to a serious of raids on distributors based on Elche's Carrus industrial estate. Earlier this autumn, the National

Torrevieja council has scrapped a body that has never met since 2007, namely a Municipal Tourist Agency. Mayor, José Manuel Dolon and Tourism councillor, Fanny Serrano

made the announcement at the city’s tourism information office on Tuesday, with Dolon saying that the entity never produced a budget, accounts, or minutes of meetings.

Police raided Chinese-run warehouses in the same area that sold mass quantities of fake goods, but this time the focus was on at least eight shoe and textile exporters and

importers, which were all simultaneously raided. A number of arrests were made, as well officers seizing a large number of documents and computers.

Wandering Hands

Found Guilty Two young French men who raped a British tourist in a car parked on a Benidorm street six years ago have been jailed for five years each by an Alicante court. The woman was

assaulted on the back seat of the vehicle on Calle Lepanto in August 2009, after she was lured in with a false promise of a lift to the bus station. A third man was acquitted.

Water Works

Spain has the third highest shoplifting rate in Europe, and is sixth in the world, according to the Global Retail Theft Barometer survey. Finland and Holland top the European league of shame, with Spain losing

around two and a half billion euros a year to thieving. Retail crime and its prevention account for just over two percent of Spanish store overheads, but the good news is that pilfering is coming down compared to the

figures for 2014. The most popular items of clothing and accessories which were stolen included shoes and handbags whilst smartphones were the most popular goods for thieves in electronics shops.

Tasty Surprise

Cop Shop Gran Alacant is to get its own local police station from later this month. The area comes under the Santa Pola municipality which has meant residents having to travel up the N-332 to Santa Pola to file complaints and reports.

Chinese Laundry

Alicante Provincial Council is to spend over 600 thousand euro on improving water infrastructures in the Orihuela area. Purification processes are to be improved at the Hurchillo, St. Barthelemy

and Torremendo plants (pictured), with plans for improvements to the La Murada pumping station and sewage piping between the areas of Desamparados and Raiguero de Bonanza.

A 73-year-old woman took the meaning of a Kinder Surprise to a whole new level as she put some drugs into the famous chocolate treat for her imprisoned son, before hiding the stash in her vagina on a visit to Fontcalent jail in Alicante. The pensioner put together a package deal in the egg with a 20 euro note; small dose of cocaine and heroin, as well as some tranquilis-

ers. She then wrapped the egg in a condom before inserting it into her vagina. When she realized she was going to be frisked, she popped out the package, before handing it over to surprised prison guards. She was found guilty in court of smuggling goods into jail and was handed down a suspended 21 month prison sentence as well as a 41 euro fine.


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Jeanette Erath - Learn Spanish

Conjugating Spanish Verbs Last week we looked at the verb PODER and I gave you some translations, here are the answers. Can you help me? – ¿puedes ayudarme?, did you manage to change the tyre? - ¿pudiste cambiar la llanta? You could try this one on – podrías pobarte éste, can you hear me? – ¿me puedes oír? / ¿puedes oírme?, I couldn´t do anything – no pude hacer nada, it´s possible to do it – se puede hacerlo, can he go with you? – ¿puede ir contigo? I can´t see – no puedo ver, they can´t find the house – no pueden encontrar la casa, can I try it on? -

that is a verb with a preposition, such as turn on, get up, etc. In Spanish, many of these are single verbs: encender, levantarse, etc. This is one of the reasons English can be difficult to learn as a foreign language, however of course Spanish also has arning le its verb + prepon fu e v a H ith sition phrases and Spanish w the problem we Jeanette have are all the conErath jugations of the verbs. But don't let that put you off, let's start look¿puedo ing at some of the most probármelo? common verb + preposition We´re not going to be able combinations and rememto attend – no vamos a ber that the verb can compoder asistir. pletely change meaning if In English one of the it's put with a certain prepohardest parts of learning sition, so be careful when the language are our com- you're speaking Spanish mon use of phrasal verbs, that you are fully aware of

LEARN SPANISH

what you're saying. I'm going to start with verbs of movement, these use the verb + a + infinitive. Here are some with examples of how they are used: ir + a = to go to: Voy a ir al cine (I'm going to go to the cinema), salir + a = to go out to: salgo a comer cada fin de semana (I go out to eat every weekend), venir + a = to come to: ella vino a quedar en mi casa (she came to stay at my house) Some other verbs which also use verb + a + infinitive are: acostumbrarse a – to become used to: me acosumbré a estudiar todas las noches (I got used to studying every evening), comenzar a ' to begin to: El hombre comenzó a trabajar (the man began to work) echarse a – to begin/start to; me eché a

llorar (I began to cry), ponerse a – to begin/start to: Juan se puso a correr (John began to run), volver a – to do something again: el niño vovió a jugar (the boy started to play). Some verbs plus preposition are then followed by a noun, such as: jugar a – to play (a game / sport / cards, etc) me gusta jugar al tenis (I like to play tennis), levar a cabo – to carry out: yo llegé a cabo mis responsibilidades, (I carried out my responsibilities), parecerse a – to look like: los niños parecen a sus padres, subir a – to get on/into (a vehicle) – subí al autobus, tocarle a una persona – to be a persons turn: te toca a ti (it´s your turn). The next verb takes con

+ infinitive: soñar con – to dream about/dream of: sueño con ir a Los Angeles (I dream of going to Los Angeles). These next verbs take con + noun (or pronoun) acabar con – to finish: acabo con mis deberes: I´ve finished my homewrok, casarse con – to get married to: José se casó con Ana (Jose got married to Ana), contar con – to count on/rely on: cuenta conmigo (count on me), quedarse con – to keep: me quedo con el coche (I´m keeping the car), soñar con – to dream of/about: sueñas conmigo (dream about me). These following verbs take the preposition de + infinitive: acabar de – to have just: acabo de llegar (I´ve just arrived) cesar de

– to stop: cesó de llover (it stopped raining), olvidarse de – to forget to: Juan se olvidó a estudiar (John forgot to study), tratar de – to try to: Trato de hacer un buen trabajo (I try to do a good job). We´ll continue next week with some more, hasta entonces, que tengáis una buena semana. If you´re interested in learning Spanish, my classes are filling up so please send me an e-mail to onevoicespain@gmail.com and I´ll tell you more. I also have a class for English children to help with their reading and writing, so whatever your needs, talk to me and I can explain how you and your family can become confident in Spanish and English.


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Friday 13th November 2015

Xmas Rascals

The Rascals are hitting the streets early next month with a Christmas Sing Along raising money for the APANEE children’s charity as well as for youngsters in Los Montesinos. Two open performances

will be happening at Los Montesinos square on Sunday December 6th at 1.00pm, and then at San Luis square on Saturday December 12th at 1.00pm. More details are on their website, www.therascals.org

Local Giveaway

The Campoverde Theatre Group have been busy handing out money to worthy local causes raised from their productions. A 500 euro donation was given to Torrevieja homeless charity, Reach Out (pictured), as well as

500 euros to Help Vega Baja and 250 euro for the Mar Menor Alzheimer’s group, AMMA. The group’s next production is a totally original pantomime, The Owl and The Pussy Cat which will be staged in February.

Fayre Enough There’ll be plenty of seasonal spirit for everybody at the end of the month in Torrevieja as the La Siesta Ladies Friendship Group hold their annual Tinsel and Turkey Fayre at La Siesta church on Saturday

November 28th starting at 10.30am. There’ll be loads of turkey and stuffing to enjoy as well as plenty of stalls and live Christmas music. All the proceeds will go to local charities.

Getting Closer

Age Concern Costa Blanca South is getting ever nearer to their target of 30 thousand euro so that they buy a new minibus. The latest contribution has been 368 euro from the Fillies Club in Dolores, with chairwoman, Gwyn Stuckley pictured handing over the money to Age Concern President,

Chattering Teeth The November meeting of the Chatters friendship group supported by Help At Home, Mar Menor, will be feature a talk by a dentist this coming Wednesday (Nov 18th) at the Pasty Shack, Rio Nalon, Los Alcazares from 10.30am. The informative presentation will include helpful advice about dental health and care, and there will be free refreshments along with the chance to make new friends. For more details about Chatters, go to the website, www.helpathome.es

Maureen Payne. Age Concern is staging an Open Week from next Monday (November 16th) through to the following Friday between 10.30am and 12.30pm at their centre on Calle Paganini, La Siesta, Torrevieja. Everybody is more than welcome to come along and meet the Age Concern volunteers.

Local & News

Onwards Braveheart

Braveheart the donkey is recovering well after an operation following a rescue last month organised by the Rojales-based Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre and the Guardia Civil’s animal welfare division, Seprona. The sevenyear-old animal was kept in terrible conditions in the

Valencia area, and was subsequently operated on at the Alicante horse hospital after concerns over one of Braveheart’s testicles remaining his abdomen. The operation went well and as you can see the donkey is enjoying life at his new home in Rojales


Friday 13th November 2015

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The Healing Power of Pets for Elderly People

For elderly pet owners, who often live alone or in group facilities, pets can help reduce stress, lower blood pressure, increase social interaction and physical activity and help them learn. "A new pet can stimulate someone to read up on an animal or breed, which can be very mentally stimulating and important at that age," says Dr. Katharine Hillestad, a well known and well respected veterinarian. Pets provide other intangibles. "Dogs—and other pets—live very much in the here and now. They don't worry about tomorrow. And tomorrow can be very scary for an older person. By having an animal with that sense of now, it tends to rub off on people," says Dr. Jay P. Granat, a New Jersey psychotherapist. And pets can reduce depression and lessen loneliness. "Older pet

Pets

Friday 13th November 2015

owners have often told us how incredibly barren and lonely their lives were without their pet's companionship, even when there were some downsides to owning an active pet," says Linda Anderson, The couple speaks about the joys of pet ownership. Pets benefit, too, particularly when older folks adopt older pets. "These lucky pets go from the pound to paradise. Since most of the adopters are retired, they have lots of time to devote to a previously unwanted pet," But because people age so differently, the decision needs to be made carefully, because there's no single right pet. Think about the size and needs of the pet as well as the needs of the human, as the relationship needs to work both ways to encourage a happy and effective friendship.

How To Tame A Feral Cat

All animals need three things: food, water and shelter. When taking in a feral cat, the animal also needs time, love and patience. The key to taming a stray or feral cat successfully is to go through the process slowly, always making sure the cat is comfortable with the pace. The process of taming cats can take from two to six weeks (longer for some exceptionally skittish cats) depending on their age and state of wildness. Individuals can differ greatly in temperament, with some taming up immediately whilst some may take quite a long time. Anybody attempting to tame cats should be totally committed and patient, and the first point of call should be to take them to a vet for a full

checkover. Provide a Safe Room It is recommended when taking in a stray you have a room set aside for the taming process. This room should be completely enclosed so the cat cannot escape and should include food, water, a litter box and a hiding place for your new friend. If the cat won't follow you into the room willingly, you can trap her in a carrier or humane trap, using food as bait, and bring her into the room. Feeding The easiest way to tame a stray cat and form a bond is to feed her. If the cat is underweight, provide extra food until she gains a healthy weight. Speak in a comforting voice to the cat while she eats. Stay in the safe room

during feeding, but do not impede on the cat's space before she's ready. Work up to the point where the cat feels comfortable enough to let you pet her while she eats. Handling Petting a stray cat is an important means of building a relationship. However, you should never try to touch a stray cat before she's ready. A feral cat is more likely to bite or scratch. When the cat allows you to touch her and enjoys the contact, take small steps in increasing the affection until you reach the point of picking up and holding the cat. This can be a slow process, where patience is needed. Housebreaking If your stray cat does her business outside the litter

box, spend some time getting her acclimated to using it. Take samples of your cat's faeces or urine and place them in the litter box so she can find her scent. Restrain the cat to the safe room until she consistently uses the litter box to do her business. Fortunately, even feral cats quickly learn to use a litter box. The Hiding Place Stray cats will feel a need to hide at times to feel safe. Provide a small, semienclosed hideout for your stray cat so she can retreat when necessary. A wooden crate turned on its side with a blanket makes a good hiding spot. Make sure to respect the cat's space and do not attempt to touch her when she is in the hideout.

Pets Corner: Can You take in a Homeless Dog or Cat?

BLACKIE Blackie is aged between two and three, and is a loving and loyal dog that will do anything to please you. He has had such a bad life he truly deserves a kind loving owner that will appreciate how special he really is. He is great with other dogs. For more on Blackie, please call PEPA on 650 304 746 or send them an email to p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail. com

COOPER Cooper is about two years old and was rescued from under a caravan, and now at 50% good health. He needs a foster home to finish his recovery. He is a beautiful natured dog and great with other dogs and wonderful with people. PEPA would cover all his fostering costs, so if could foster Cooper, phone 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail. com

GEORGE George is a beautiful six month old pup, who is very sweet and loves to be cuddled and treated like a baby. He has the shape of a puppy on his chest and will be medium to large when fully grown. He is being fostered with other dogs and cats. For more on George, please call PEPA on 650 304 746 or send an email to p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail. com

LUCY Lucy is a tiny three month old Spaniel cross and was rescued from a farmer's field with her sister, starving and infested with parasites. She has been to the vets for treatment and is now in perfect health and had her first vaccination. She is good with other dogs and will be small when fully grown. Call: 645 469 253. www.petsinspain.com

OLLIE Ollie is an adorable three month old pup that was found abandoned in the campo along with his sister Mindy. He is looking for a home where he can do what he loves... Play. He also has a lovely disposition. For more on this adorable boy please phone PEPA on 650 304 746 or send an email for more information to p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail. com

SPIKE Spike is almost two years old and was found wandering in the campo as a very thin, four month old puppy. He is a lovely boy with a great personality who deserves the pleasures of a loving home; Spike is fully vaccinated, micro chipped and castrated. If you would like to visit him or want more information then please contact the kennels on 966 710 047 or email info@satanimalrescue.com


Friday 13th November 2015

Boost The Income From Your Savings

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In retirement, income is more precious than when you were working. It can be tempting to put all your money into savings accounts, which feel reasonably safe. But while this strategy might generate enough income to meet your retirement budgeting needs today, you could be locking yourself into falling living standards later on. Inflation is the worry for all expats taking income from their savings. Even if inflation was just 2% a year, an income of £100 a week today, would need to rise to £102 next year, £122 after 10 years and £149 after 20 years for you to maintain the same standard of living that you have today. There are other ways to grow your income. To protect against inflation, advisers have typically recommended that you invest part of your money in other assets, such as gilts, corporate bonds, fixed interest securities and also equities (shares), to build in the opportunity for your income and capital to grow as the years go by. For example, you might consider investment funds aiming to provide high income by investing in well-established companies that pay out dividends. The Barclays UK Equity Income Fund has provided an average annual return of more than 7% per annum over the last 5 years. Investing in property funds has also traditionally been seen as a source of stable and growing income (underpinned by the rents paid for shops, offices and industrial units) and potential for growth. With both equities and property you are accepting extra capital risk - the risk that the value of your investment might fall - for the chance of a higher return. However, the markets for all investments have been turbulent since the 2008 global financial crisis. With any financial product, your adviser should check very carefully that you understand how it works, the risks involved and what you are paying. If you want further advice on investing some of your money for income then please contact us at contact@seagatewealth.es or phone the office on 965 704 338.


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Friday 13th November 2015

Tony Mayes - About Life

Cam Dances Around EU Future

In, out, shake it all about! David Cameron is doing the Hokey Cokey, but is he? Bluff or double bluff - will the British PM really campaign for the UK to get out of Europe if his terms for reform are not met? He says he will, but there are so many vested financial interests which want Britain to be inside the EU that when it comes to the crunch, Cameron will pretend he has won real reforms in a political fudge and the 'yes' campaigners will do what they are already doing namely frightening the pants off us that we will be living in poverty if we pull out - which of course is ridiculous. For us ex-pats relying on a state pension which rises with inflation it's a crucial decision, because the last thing we want is for the pension to be pegged, simply because we're not living in the UK. Looking at whether Britain would be better off, worse off or about the same outside Europe, new figures on UK exports make interesting reading. Apparently Britain sold almost 16 billion pounds more in goods to countries outside the EU than those within it - with exports to Europe lagging behind those to the rest of the world for a record 13 months in a row. Business is business and entrepreneurs will go where the cash is - so if Europe is not a money maker then

there are plenty of other countries which are. Let's face it, British business people do deals every day with countries we hate and don't bat an eyelid. Anything goes when there's a buck to be made! Britain has gone stark staring mad in a political war over financial cuts. Travel though some areas and the street lights are out and some road junctions unlit at night are positively dangerous. In some parts it's like stepping back in time to the Victorian era when streets were lit by gas lamps and all dark and dingy. Chief constables and the Police Federation have been working overtime frightening people that the cuts will reduce the police force to a totally unsafe level. We've even had one barmy police and crime commissioner saying he wants variable speed cameras on the M1 permanently switched on and to catch motorists even if they're going one mph over the limit, with the money going to fund the cash-strapped police force. Thank goodness the idea won't see the light of day - and in any event any additional money raised would not have gone directly to the police. Sadly, with politics now a clear cut battle between Left and Right, common sense has disappeared. What's needed is a

reduction in spending which allows us to balance the books and begin to erode the debt mountain, but not damage essential services like the police, defence, education or health and protects the weakest and most vulnerable in society. And it's certainly questionable whether some of the Draconian proposals to save money are right and fair. Take the case of A-level student Olivia Cork, 19, who lost a leg to cancer. She's now been told she's not "disabled enough" to have a Mobility car and can manage without. She's been driving to school in a specially-adapted Ford Fiesta for the past two years,

but has now been told by the Department for Work and Pensions she's no longer eligible for it. She has dreams of becoming a Paralympian, having taken up swimming, and claims the car is vital for her to get to her local pool for classes seven times a week. If you can walk a certain distance, a few house lengths, then you are not deemed disabled enough. It does not matter if you use crutches or prosthetic legs. The sixthform student now faces the prospect of the car being taken away from her unless she can raise almost ÂŁ5,000 to buy the vehicle outright. What is your biggest bugbear when you're doing the Christmas shopping in the crowds? Perhaps it is a group of people who meet and want to discuss world politics for hours and block the path of people. Perhaps it's those who dawdle along with all the time in the world and just get in your way. Here's an interesting idea to cut down on the pre-Christmas shopping tensions - pedestrian fast lanes! Markings have gone down in the pavement outside a Liverpool store designating a "fast lane" so shoppers on a mission can get past the pavement hoggers. Experts say a faster high street could vastly improve the overall shopping ÂŹexperience for British shoppers across the UK. They add that

the chances are these will soon be rolled out across the UK shopping centres following the Liverpool experiment's success. Research showed shoppers hated people checking phones, waiting in queues, rude staff, and battling through crowds. Towns get notoriety for a multitude of reasons - maybe it's because someone famous was born there, or a notable battle happened nearby. But one Spanish town is suffering acute embarrassment for gaining notoriety for all the wrong reasons. It's As Pontes in Galicia that plays host to a food festival. Grown there is rapini, a leafy vegetable similar to spinach - and the town sent out publicity material inviting all and sundry to a rapini festival, the idea being that local restaurants would offer dishes with the vegetable. There was one snag however. When people tried to translate the Spanish or Galician dialect into English through Google it translated as a clitoris festival, and organisers suffered instant acute embarrassment. Now Google is in hot water as locals there want Google to save the town from an invasion of people expecting dishes on the menu other than spinach! In addition the town wants Google to accept Galician language which is somewhat similar to

Portuguese, which is how the translation problem arose in the first place. Finally, I cannot let pass the appalling leniency of British magistrates faced with three alleged anarchist militants who refused to give their identities to police or the court. They are accused of failing to give their identities to a police constable when required to do so. These youths were said to be part of an anarchist riot, clashing with police in a protest against government benefit cuts in Whitehall. Fireworks were let off in the faces and underneath police horses in a bid to frighten them. Traffic cones were thrown at them and laser lights were aimed at the animals. The three were arrested and charged and brought before the court, but were released on bail and told to return on a date in 2016. They and other students laughed at the court as they left. What an appalling example this is - we're going to have all and sundry refusing to identify themselves when stopped by police. Britain has become far too soft - too many nambypamby do-gooders calling the shots. Punishments should be a deterrent and if someone uses violence unlawfully, then society should inflict a violent punishment in return. To let bolshy idiots run rings around the law is just plain crazy.



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Friday 13th November 2015

Homes & Garden

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Make a Christmas Create festive floral arrangments table wreath top of ring. (You may want to do the inside of your ring as well.)

Use jasmine to create a beautifully crafted Christmas table decoration. What you will need An oasis ring (ours is 12inch diameter) 2-3 bunches of viburnum greenery Lengths of jasmine Stainless steel 18-gauge wire Note **Oasis rings are available from floral supply stores and some florists; viburnum greenery and jasmine are available from florists; wire is available from hardware stores. Step-by-step 1. Soak the oasis ring in water for about 5 minutes, or until bubbles have stopped coming out of it (don't press

oasis ring down as this will cause air bubbles to enter foam, creating dry spots).

3. Pluck small lengths of jasmine buds and dot around wreath, pushing into oasis ring on an angle as you did with greenery. Repeat process with jasmine flowers.

2. Cut greenery into 10cm lengths - each length should have a stem about 5cm long, with two leaves at the top. Place oasis ring on a flat surface, plastic-side down. Working around the side of oasis ring, push stems in on a slight angle, keeping the angle the same all the way around. Repeat process on

To hang wreath, loop wire around opposite sides of wreath then make a loop at the back and hang from a door knob or hook. Alternatively, display wreath on a table. Wreath is best made on the day you want to display it. To keep it fresh, spray with an atomiser if it is hanging, or lightly water if resting on a table.

Nothing captures a sense of celebration like a vivid arrangement of fresh blooms. Renowned creative florist Saskia Havekes of Grandiflora shares simple ideas to enliven your home. When gathering materials for any creation, always imagine how nature would have made it. Have confidence in your choices and never cut anything too short – you can never make it longer, but you can always prune further. Consider your chosen vessels or the setting you’re complementing. If in doubt, an easy trick is to select one thing that’s in season and buy a mass of it – abundance is always attractive, as is simplicity. Also, a good vase can make all the difference.

Keep flowers clean and in fresh water. To extend life, recut stems on an angle and plunge into cold water. If wilted, recut a lot to revive. A generous mixture of field flowers can become more intriguing when a key bloom is added for a strike of colour, shape or texture. Humble blooms can be a highlight when placed as specimens in a cluster of containers. Adding an unusual leaf or element from the garden creates a thoughtprovoking and unpredictable flourish. Grouping containers allows you to build up a look, and the choice of vase can make all the difference. Tightneck vessels will highlight a specimen flower or stem of individual flowers, while hold-

ers with wide openings work for more generous bouquets. Keep the water at an elegant level. Don’t always fill the vase right to the brim. Creating a wreath is to be approached with gusto. You can include succulents, pods and berries to produce a piece that keeps enduring. For a dramatic wreath, you have to be ready to apply some energy and strength. It is crucial to ensure everything is secured properly – this allows for a better shape. A base can be made by weaving long, pliable branches into a circle. Wire or jute are essential tools in carrying this off. As an alternative to placing a bouquet in a vase, a beautiful bundle of flowers put directly onto a table can be a unique way of creating a striking centrepiece. Be sure to choose hardy flowers, fruit and foliage – even vegetables – in order to avoid wilting. Positioning single specimens (or small floral displays) into vases around a bundle can make the setting more extravagant. Placing lots of bundles end to end will create a generouslooking garland to frame your creations perfectly.


Homes & Garden

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Friday 13th November 2015

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Homes & Gardens +

Friday 13th November 2015

Building a Carport A carport is a covered parking space, usually attached to the house, that is not completely enclosed by walls. There are two improvement projects that involve carports. One is to convert an existing carport into storage space or living space by enclosing it. The other is to build a new carport. Sometimes a new carport is needed to replace an old one. It can also be a roundabout way of adding new living space to some homes without building a room addition. If you are wondering how to add an extra room in a home that has an attached garage, you might consider building a carport and converting the garage into an extra room. Planning. Consult your local town hall about necessary permits and restrictions before you make any plans; you may not be allowed to build at all. Local codes may specify minimum dimensions for parking spaces, minimum driveway area, or maximum driveway slope. You may also have to consider the access to your property and the application of a VADO. Planning will be much easier if you have a driveway beside your house with a setback that allows room for a new structure. If your drive-

way is on the property line or within the setback, you will probably have to build a fire wall. Building A Carport The actual plan for building a carport is quite simple. It should be at least 12 feet wide and 20 feet long for one car, or 20 by 20 feet for two cars. The roof should have a minimum slope of 1 in 12, but a slope of 3 in 12 or steeper is better in snow areas. The roof usually slopes away from the house, so the house must be tall enough for the low side of the carport roof to be at least 8 feet high. Otherwise, the roof will have to cantilever over the top of the house to attain the proper slope. Floor and footings. Although a gravel floor may be adequate in some cases, the best design incorporates a concrete slab at least 4 inches thick. Most codes require that a new slab extend into the ground even farther, usually to a minimum depth of 12 inches or to the frost line. To build a new slab, excavate to the depth of the concrete plus 4 inches to accommodate a sand base. Excavate around the perimeter for a footing 12 inches wide. Build forms around the outside of the footing, so their tops are at the desired final

elevation. Place a 3-inch layer of sand on the bottom of the slab area — not in the

holes in the driveway at each post location, and excavate to the depth of the footings.

footing trench. Cover the sand with a layer of 6-mil polyethylene sheeting to provide a vapor barrier, and cover the sheeting with the rest of the sand. Put steel reinforcing bars in the footing and steel mesh in the slab. When you pour the concrete, place a metal anchor at each post location while the concrete is still fresh. The slab should slope away from the house. If the existing driveway does not have a sufficient footing to support the posts or a wall, build individual footings for all the posts. Break

Fill the holes with concrete and place post anchors in them. Posts. Locate posts 6 to 8 feet on center, depending on the size of your beam. A 4 by 4 post is adequate for most carports, but 4 to 6 stock and steel columns are also common. When the concrete is cured, install the posts. Attach each one to the post base with 1/2-inch-diameter carriage bolts. Brace each post in two directions with diagonal braces after plumbing it with a level. Do not cut them to length until all are erected.

When all the posts are up, measure and mark both corner posts at the height at which the beam will rest. Stretch a chalk line between these marks and snap it against the p o s t s . Repeat the procedure on the other posts. Mark cut lines, saw off the tops of the posts, then attach the beam on top with a metal beam connector. An alternative method is to measure longer posts and bolt a 2-by stringer to each side. The inside stringer should be slightly higher than the outside stringer, so that the sloped rafters will rest on both. Rafters. Rafters, supported by a beam and a ledger bolted to the house wall, will span the width of the carport. To install the ledger, mark a level line along the wall of the house at a height that yields the required slope. Two-by rafter stock makes a fine ledger. Cut to length and mark the rafter spacing. Nail joist hangers where the rafters will attach. Determine the location of the studs and secure

the ledger to them with lag bolts. If the span is long, consider using 4-by lumber. Once you have selected stock, you next task is to cut a pattern rafter. Using a carpenter’s square, mark the plumb cut at the house end. After making the plumb cut, calculate the dimension of the bird’s mouth by using rafter framing techniques. Finish cutting the pattern rafter, then test it to see if it fits. Make any necessary adjustments, and cut out the rest of the rafters. You may have to notch the bottom of each plumb cut slightly so that it will fit into the joist hanger. Nail the rafters into the joist hangers and toenail them into the beam. Install blocking over the beam and at the midpoint. If the rafters overhang the beam, attach a fascia board. The Roof. Roofing plywood should be at least 1/2inch thick. Nail plywood over the rafters, laying sheets perpendicular to the rafters and staggering end joints at least 4 feet. Install flashing around the edges and along the house wall. Install roofing trim to match the house, and install a gutter and a downspout on the outside edge of the roof.


Friday 13th November to Thursday 19th November 2015


2 - The Courier TV Pull-out

A Touch of Jealousy - Whatson´s Choice

If I can start on a serious note, I was hearing on the news about the immigration crisis across Europe. It is said that countries like Germany are welcoming immigrants as they are only a few years away from running out of workers due to early retirement ages. Other countries putting up the virtual barriers and not wanting immigrants, but there is a hidden side to this story which doesn´t get any press at all, the immigration crisis affecting none-animated characters like myself. I don´t know if you noticed, but have you seen the influx of bears? TKO Teddy started it all off a few weeks ago, muscling in on my territory. This week he´s even closer than ever, moving from the sports pages into the TV pull-out. Not only that, he has a friend it

would appear, another bear in in sight. This week Pudsey bear is all over the TV. You see, all of these bears, coming over here, steeling our jobs! Not that I mind, I actually think it´s a good thing to be honest, I was joking about the bears. I´m just a little bit jealous of all the great places they get to visit whilst I just have to sit in the corner being stared at all day. I want to get out more but I don´t have a long enough extension cable. The life of a TV, sigh. I am also a little envious of how these bears wear

their accessories. I hope Pudsey didn´t suffer with his eye problem but he wears the patch a lot better than I do, and TKO Teddy has a big sash that he wears, but I´m trying my best. A n y w a y, back to this week and Children in Need will dominate the schedules firstly, and let’s be honest, it is a great event that raises millions for the needy, so please enjoy the show and, if you can, consider donating something. Televisions are not allowed credit cards so all I can do is volunteer my time, which I am doing gladly. We are also returning to the jungle for I´m a

Celebrity, Get Me Ooouuuuuuuuutttt oooffff heeeeeerrrreeeeeee. Which is nice, although, if I´m honest, I haven´t actually heard of a couple of the celebs. It looks like a great mix of people though. The Coroner looks like an interesting piece of drama too this week, giving a different view on the usual investigations that we are absorbed into. Oh, I just remembered something, a tele favourite is set to return at Christmas. Corrie star Liz Dawn, famous for playing Vera Duckworth of course, but it´s not the cobbles she´s returning to, it´s the dales, Emmerdale to be precise. Anyway, that´s me done for another week. Look after yourselves and those you care for. Tatty bye my friends, tatty bye.

Children in Need

Sir Terry Wogan and Tess Daly kick off the BBC Children in Need Appeal show extravaganza, live from the BBC on Friday. Call the Midwife will get a glittering make-over as four of its stars take to the dancefloor to compete in the Strictly Come Dancing special for BBC Children in Need. Later in the evening the cast of EastEnders will travel back in time for a vintage Hollywood-style musical performance. Multi-award winning

songstress Ellie Goulding will be live in studio with an exclusive performance of her brand new single, whilst music legend Rod Stewart will treat the audience to a performance of his new song. As Fearne Cotton joins the fun, other entertainment treats include Harry Hill taking viewers on a whirlwind tour of the history of TV, a performance of the official BBC Children in Need single and the Children’s Choir. As the action moves over

to BBC Two, the fun continues in the Queen Vic. Hosted by Shane Ritchie, the house band will perform, fronted by a surprise special guest. There will also be exclusive performances from Rob Brydon and Sir Tom Jones’ concert, One Big Night. Returning to BBC One, Rochelle Humes and Nick Grimshaw join the fun as the star studded action resumes.

Pop princess Selena Gomez will perform her new single in a UK exclusive, whilst Years And Years, Shane Filan from Westlife and Girls Aloud's Nadine Coyle will also perform during the evening. Later in the evening West End stars from musicals Beautiful, Kinky Boots and Bend It Like Beckham will delight the audience before the final total of the night is revealed.

...Get Me Out of Here

ITV has officially confirmed the I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! 2015 cast - but not all of the rumours are correct. A leaked lineup earlier this

week suggested a battle of the reality stars - but those celebs are missing from the official list of names confirmed by ITV. And Spandau Ballet's

Tony Hadley has come out of nowhere to join the jungle fun. He'll join Union J's George Shelley and former X Factor judge and creative director

Brian Friedman around the campfire. Also confirmed are Most Haunted star Yvette Fielding, Dragons' Den's Duncan Bannatyne and Trinny and Susannah star Susannah Constantine. Chris Eubank and footballer Kieron Dyer will be repping the sporting world, while rounding out the cast are royal biographer Lady Colin Campbell and Hollyoaks star Jorgie Porter - who only signed up a few days ago. Of course, there are always late entrants on I'm a Celebrity... so there might still be some names to come. I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! 2015 kicks off on Sunday (November 15) at 10pm Spanish time on ITV.

The Coroner New to afternoons on BBC One, crime investigations against a stunning seaside backdrop are at the heart of this entertaining new drama series, which follows a high-flying solicitor who returns to live and work in the small town she escaped as a teenager. As coroner, Jane Kennedy’s job is to investigate sudden or unexplained deaths in a beautiful English coastal community. With a new and intriguing case to investigate in each episode, starting with the discovery of a body, Jane finds herself having to work with her old flame Davey Higgins, who is now the local detective sergeant. The Coroner combines mystery and potential danger with the warm, lighthearted tone of Jane’s relationships with her colleagues, family and the local community. While Jane is talented and tenacious in seeking justice for the dead, her personal life is a bit more haphazard. Jane (Claire Goose) is woken by a call from Clint (Oliver Gomm) telling her that a boy (Steve Kernan, played by Archie Rush) has been found dead at the base of a lighthouse. Jane then finds that her daughter Beth (Grace HoggRobinson) has snuck out of the house and is at a sunrise beach party. At the scene, Davey (Matt Bardock) tells Jane that a text message to Steve’s mother, May (Sophie Duval), suggests suicide but a devastated teenage girl (Imogen Waterhouse) turns up at the Coroner’s Office telling Jane that Steve would never have killed himself. Jane talks to Steve’s parents and feels that his mother is holding something back. Meanwhile, Davey discovers that Steve’s best friend, Matt (Oscar Lloyd), is Beth’s new boyfriend. Jane tries her best to befriend Matt while investigating Steve’s death and searching for the mysterious girl who visited her. The question on everyone’s minds is - did Steve jump or was he pushed?

Doctor In The House Doctor in the House is a new three-part health series on BBC One which sees three normal families inviting a doctor into their lives for two months, to undergo the health MOT of a lifetime. Filmed observationally, the doctor will investigate every aspect of each family’s lives by living alongside them - following them to work, relaxing with them at home, eating with them and even staying in their homes overnight to observe their sleep patterns. Via a series of rigorous observations, medical tests and surprise visits, the doctor will deliver a hard-hitting health diagnosis for the families. Then, launching into a full-scale campaign to turn their unhealthy lifestyles around, he’ll put a range of simple and effective changes into effect. But will each family stick to the regime? After just a few weeks of consultancy, the doctor will repeat the tests that he carried out at the start of the process to see just how much their health has improved. The families are not only shown how to change their eating habits and diets (e.g. time-restricted feeding and fasting) and exercise more (or even exercise less in one case), but also the benefits of cognitive behaviour therapy, acupuncture, counselling, meditation, movement therapy and other similar therapies. Throughout the GP does not prescribe any drugs and only administers, when necessary, vitamins and supplements. One contributor who is on three drugs to treat his type 2 diabetes is, by the end of the trial, down to one. In the same episode, our doctor shows another patient how to deal with the menopause and stress. In the second episode the GP treats a chronic back pain sufferer while overcoming his addiction to painkillers and his son finally finds relief from eczema. In the final episode, another patient also reverses her type 2 diabetes diagnosis and the whole family benefits from new dietary and exercise regimes. The doctor, Dr Rangan Chatterjee (pictured, centre) works as an NHS GP in Oldham where he looks after a deprived and socially isolated patient population. He has a specific interest in, where appropriate, trying to treat people without necessarily resorting to drugs and tries to get the message out there that significant, non-medicinal lifestyle changes can improve your health and, in some cases, save your life.


Friday 13th November 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Wanted 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Housing Enforcers Neighbourhood 12:30 Blues 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 The Edge 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 My Life on a Plate 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show

07:15 My Life on a Plate 08:00 The Edge 08:45 Junior Bake Off 09:15 Pound Shop Wars 09:45 Great British Menu 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 Coast 12:25 Country Show Cook Off 12:55 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix - Practice 1 14:45 The Great British Bake Off 15:45 Wild Brazil 16:45 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix - Practice 2 18:35 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two

20:30 Children in Need 2015 20:00 Rick Stein From Venice to Istanbul The A night of fun and fundrais- chef’s gastronomic road trip ing Ellie Goulding performs reaches a conclusion as he live, the cast of EastEnders arrives in Istanbul star in a vintage Hollywood21:00 Mastermind Quiz style music performance, show Scott Mills attempts to abseil down the Blackpool 21:30 An Island Parish: Tower, a choir of over 1500 Falklands Documentary folchildren sing in unison lowing life in the British overacross the nation, Sir Bruce seas territory in the south Forsyth presents a Strictly Atlantic Come Dancing special as the cast of Call the Midwife take to the famous ballroom, Warwick Davis, C3PO and R2-D2 star in a Star Wars sketch that sees them joined by some very famous Jedi fans and Rod Stewart sings live

22:00 Great Continental Railway Journeys Michael Portillo embarks on a Greek odyssey from the Athens port of Piraeus

SOAPS

Liz are back together. Tracy then drags Amy over to Michelle, making her reveal how she saw Liz and Tony snogging.

23:00 Children in Need 2015 23:40 Newsnight 00:10 Artsnight 00:40 Later with Jools Holland 01:45 Film - Cross of Iron (18) 23:00 News 23:40 Children 03:50 Question Time 04:50 in Need 2015 03:00 Class of 92: Out of Their Weather for the Week League 05:50 This is BBC Two Ahead 03:05 News

There’s no Emmerdale tonight because of the Spain v England football match. In Coronation Street, Tracy is horrified to discover that Tony has emptied their joint business account. She angrily confronts him over the missing money. Soon afterwards, Amy reveals that Tony and

As Tony proudly reveals to Liz how he emptied Tracy’s business account, the couple kiss - just as Michelle and Tracy burst in and catch them in the act. Michelle listens in disbelief as Liz explains how Tony has changed and she has decided to give him another chance. Liz then tells Tony that if their relationship is to work, he has to win her family round and the only way to do that is to give Steve’s share of The Rovers back. Will Tony agree?

Morning Good 07:00 Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Pick Me 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Coronation Street Will Tony agree to Liz’s terms? International 20:30 Football:Spain v England Coverage of the friendly match from Estadio Jose Rico Perez in Alicante, featuring two sides that qualified convincingly for Euro 2016. Reigning European champions Spain won nine and lost just one of their group matches, while Roy Hodgson’s men went one better, boasting a 100 per cent record. The sides last met in a friendly in November 2011, when Frank Lampard’s goal gave England a 1-0 win at Wembley. Mark Pougatch presents, with analysis from Lee Dixon and Ian Wright, and commentary by Clive Tyldesley and Glenn Hoddle (Kick Off 20:45) 23:00 News and Weather 23:45 International Football The 00:50 Highlights Chase 01:40 Jackpot247 04:00 Jeremy Kyle USA 04:40 ITV Nightscreen

The Courier TV Pull-out - 3

07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:30 Come Dine with Me 13:00 News 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:40 Racing: Cheltenham 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Homes by the Sea 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News 20:30 Unreported World Kiki King and Ruhi Hamid travel to Mexico, which has become an international hotspot for the fast expanding, multi-billiondollar child surrogacy industry 21:00 Grand Designs Kevin returns to Cornwall to see one of his favourite Grand Designs, and discover whether Rebecca Sturrock and Gregory Kewish have been successful with their ambitious plans 22:00 Gogglebox Britain’s favourite opinionated TV viewers share their sharp,i sometimes emotional critiques of the week’s biggest and best shows 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 00:05 First Dates 01:10 Rude Tube 02:10 Film - Maniac (18) 03:40 Supernatural 04:30 Four Rooms 05:25 Location, Location, Location

Meanwhile, in an effort to cheer him up, Eva offers to take Simon shopping. Simon reveals how lonely he was during his time in Portsmouth as Peter has a new girlfriend and hardly spent any time with him. Eva reports back to Leanne, but when Leanne quizzes Simon about his trip, he gets defensive and accuses Leanne of sending him away because she didn’t want him. How will Simon respond when Leanne explains that she sent him away because he kept attacking her?

suggests to Carla they demote her to the factory floor. Johnny takes Sally to one side and tells her she is being demoted back to a machinist. Sally is outraged, but when Johnny explains that she’s the best machinist in the land and he’d like her to be supervisor, will Sally accept?

Elsewhere, Carla introduces Johnny to Sally. Johnny takes an instant dislike to Sally’s voice and

There’s no Eastenders, tonight but fans are in for a treat tonight, as Peter Andre will be heading to

Also today, Chesney admits to Sinead that he has promised Tyrone they’ll provide the Lapland grotto in their house. How will Sinead react?

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ice Road Truckers 13:10 News 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:20 NCIS 16:15 When Calls the Heart 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 Secrets of St Paul’s Cathedral Structural engineer Steve Burrows explores the world’s most iconic engineering ventures using new 3D laser-scanning technology. Steve visits St Paul’s Cathedral, London, to learn more about this iconic architectural masterpiece 21:00 Ice Road Truckers The truckers race to make their deliveries before an epic storm strikes. A stretch of thin ice leaves Alex asking for help from on high 22:00 NCIS: New Orleans When a Navy Commander’s car is stolen with his baby inside, the NCIS team must determine if this was a random carjacking or a targeted abduction 23:00 NCIS 00:00 NCIS: Los Angeles 00:55 Access 01:00 Super Casino 04:10 Inside Holloway Prison 05:00 2,000 Tattoos, 40 Piercings and a Pickled Ear 05:45 House Doctor Walford for a special Children In Need appearance. Meanwhile, EastEnders star Shane Richie will be reprising his role as host of the BBC Two Children in Need appeal show at the Queen Vic. The Alfie Moon actor will be joined by a whole host of famous faces as they pop into the infamous pub throughout the night to join in the fun.

07:00 You’ve Been Framed 07:20 Psych 08:05 Emmerdale 09:05 You’ve Been Framed 09:35 Dinner Date 10:35 Psych 11:25 The Real Housewives of Atlanta 13:10 Emmerdale 14:15 You’ve Been Framed 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 Jeremy Kyle 19:00 Judge Rinder 20:00 Totally You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Film - The Break-Up (12) 00:10 Film - Almost Married (15) 02:10 Two and a Half Men 02:30 The Vampire Diaries 03:25 Teleshopping ITV3 07:00 George and Mildred 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Murder, She Wrote 09:30 Where the Heart is 10:30 Judge Judy 11:50 A Touch of Frost 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor at Large 17:50 On the Buses 18:20 George and Mildred 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 A Touch of Frost 01:10 Film Out of Sight (15) 03:20 Where the Heart is 04:15 Judge Judy 04:55 ITV3 Nightscreen 05:00 Emmerdale Omnibus ITV4 07:00 Magnum, PI 07:55 Gunsmoke 09:00 The Sweeney 10:05 Minder 11:10 Gunsmoke 12:15 The Professionals 13:15 Storage Wars 13:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live 18:15 The Professionals 19:15 Storage Wars 19:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live 00:15 Film - Tightrope (18) 02:35 Minder 03:40 Movies Now 03:50 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping

08:00 Peter Hurst, 11:00 Dennis Christian, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Andy James, 18:00 Suzy G


Saturday 14th November

4 - The Courier TV Pull-out

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Saturday Kitchen 11:45 The Lord Mayor’s Show 2015 13:10 Football Focus 13:45 Rugby League: England v New Zealand 16:10 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix Qualifying 18:20 Children in Need 2015 19:30 News 19:50 Strictly Come Dancing The competition is hotting up as nine couples take to the Strictly dance floor, all fighting to make it through to the Blackpool special

07:15 Film - Henry VIII and His Six Wives (PG) 09:15 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix Practice 1 and 2 12:55 Formula 1 13:55 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix Practice 3 15:05 Film - The Red Shoes (U) 17:15 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 17:45 Escape to the Country 18:30 Flog It 19:30 The Great Pottery Throw Down Nine potters have to make decorative hand basins

07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:35 Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 08:00 Share a Story 08:05 Oddbods 08:10 Sooty 08:25 Super 4 08:40 Adventure Time 09:00 Marvel’s Avengers Assemble 09:30 Thunderbirds are Go 10:00 Jessie 10:25 Murder, She Wrote 11:20 Countrywise 11:50 News 11:55 Jeremy Kyle USA 12:50 Downton Abbey 14:25 Judge Rinder 15:20 All Star Family Fortunes 16:05 Doc Martin 17:05 Film - Scooby-Doo (PG) 18:45 News 19:15 Catchphrase

20:30 Great Continental Railway Journeys Michael 21:15 Doctor Who This ter- embarks on a Greek The Chase: rifying story is assembled odyssey from the Athens 20:00 Celebrity Special Four from footage discovered in port of Piraeus celebrities take on one of the wreckage of Le Verrier 21:30 Dad’s Army Captain the country’s finest quiz Space Station Mainwaring is determined brains 22:00 Casualty Alicia is that all of his men will be 21:00 The X Factor The pushed to her limits and well shod with hardy, battle- remaining contestants face proves she is a brilliant doc- worthy feet their third live show tor, but will it be enough? 22:00 QI XL Stephen 22:45 The Jonathan Ross meanders about some Show Special guest tonight 22:50 The National Lottery places which start with an is Cristiano Ronaldo Live 23:00 News 23:20 ‘M’ Motd Special 00:00 Film Pirates of the Caribbean: 22:45 David Gilmour 00:00 23:50 News 00:10 Euro 2016 Highlights 00:55 The Curse of the Black Film - The Last Station (15) River Monsters 01:20 Pearl (12) 02:10 Weather 01:45 Film - Sergeant Jackpot247 04:00 Show for the Week Ahead 02:15 Rutledge (12) 03:30 This is Me the Telly 04:50 ITV News Nightscreen BBC Two

07:15 How I Met Your Mother 08:30 River Rat Race Stockton 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 The Morning Line 11:00 Frasier 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:30 The Simpsons 14:30 Racing: Cheltenham and Wetherby 17:00 Come Dine with Me 19:30 News 20:00 The Restoration Man Gareth Williams seeks help from George as he works to convert a disused Victorian church 21:00 Grand Designs Kevin visits a bright orange metal clad home and a sleek modernist house built over a river 22:00 Film - The Inbetweeners 2 (18) When old friend Jay describes Australia as “the sex capital of the world”, Neil, Will and Simon can’t wait to pay him a visit and sample the delights down under for themselves 23:55 Film - American Pie: Reunion (15) 02:05 Fargo 03:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 03:55 Hollyoaks Omnibus

07:00 Milkshake 10:00 The Saturday Show 12:00 Film - Defending Santa 13:50 Film - Trading Christmas 15:35 Film Farewell Mr Kringle (PG) 17:20 Film - Dear Santa 19:05 News 19:10 Film - Kelly’s Heroes (PG) An American soldier captures a German officer and discovers that his prisoner knows the whereabouts of $16million in Nazi gold 21:00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away In Essex, a negligent tenant flees the premises when Paul and Phil arrive to evict him 22:00 Football League Tonight Gillingham v Bury, Wigan v Rochdale, Sheffield United v Southend, Burton v Millwall, Carlisle v Bristol Rovers and Barnet v Luton 23:00 Live Championship Boxing: Blackwell v Matthews 01:00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the UK 01:55 The Gadget Show 02:50 Super Casino 04:10 Shark Attack 05:00 World’s Tallest Towers 05:50 Make it Big

13:15 Scorpion 14:15 I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here 15:15 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed 16:15 You’ve Been Framed 16:50 Celebrity Catchphrase 17:50 Film - Nim’s Island (U) 19:45 Film Kindergarten Cop (15) 22:00 Film - 2 Fast 2 Furious (15) 00:10 Celebrity Juice ITV3 13:45 A Touch of Frost 15:50 Agatha Christie’s Marple 17:50 Columbo: Troubled Waters 19:55 Doc Martin 21:00 Midsomer Murders 23:00 Lewis 01:05 A Touch of Frost ITV4 13:10 World Rally Championship Highlights 13:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live 18:15 Pawn Stars 18:45 Storage Wars Texas 19:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live 00:15 Film - Death Race (15)

09:00 Trev Massey, 12:00 Gordon Lack, 15:00 Keith Nicol

Sunday 15th November 07:15 A to Z of TV Gardening 08:00 The Big Allotment Challenge 09:00 Countryfile 10:00 An Island Parish: Falklands 10:30 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:00 Simply Nigella 12:30 My Life on a Plate 13:15 My Life on a Plate 14:00 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 15:00 Tennis: ATP World Tour Finals 18:00 Demolition 19:00 Robert Peston Goes 20:20 Strictly Come Shopping Dancing The results of last night’s show are revealed, 20:00 Caribbean with Simon Reeve Simon 21:00 Antiques begins the last leg of his Roadshow From Walmer journey in Nicaragua castle, Kent 21:00 Earth’s Wildest 22:00 The Hunt Nature Waters Ben Fogle travels documentary series narrat- to Zambia for the last chaled by Sir David lenge Attenborough, taking an intimate and detailed look 22:00 Monty Don’s Secret History of the British at the strategies employed Garden Monty examines by hunters to catch their how British gardens have prey, and the hunted to changed over the past 400 escape years

07:00 Breakfast 09:20 Motd Special 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 Homes Under the Hammer 13:00 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:15 Escape to the Country 14:45 Songs of Praise 15:20 The Hunt 16:20 F1: Brazilian Grand Prix 19:00 News 19:20 Countryfile

23:00 News 23:30 Mrs Brown’s Boys 00:00 Room 101 00:40 The Apprentice 01:40 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:45 News

23:00 Family Guy 00:05 Film - Cosmopolis (15) 01:50 Countryfile 02:45 Holby City 03:45 This is BBC Two

07:15 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:05 Chasing Perfection: From Birth to Starting Line 09:00 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:30 Racing: Cheltenham 16:00 The Simpsons 16:30 Film - Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (PG) 18:40 News 19:00 Small Animal Hospital

07:00 Milkshake 10:55 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 11:35 Football League Tonight 12:35 Police Interceptors 13:35 Film - My Santa (PG) 15:15 Film - A Fairytale Christmas 17:00 Film The Christmas Secret 18:40 Film - Christmas with the Kranks (PG) 20:30 News

20:00 Restoring Britain’s Landmarks The restoration begins at St Edward’s Presbytery, a Grade I listed masterpiece designed and originally owned by one of 20:00 Jekyll and Hyde Britain’s greatest ever Maggie has developed architects, Augustus Pugin Sepsis, and Robert works tirelessly to find a cure 21:00 Million Pound Mega Yachts Documentary 21:00 The X Factor about the Monaco Yacht Results Show The singing Show competition’s latest elimination is announced 22:00 Homeland Saul decides to order a sweep at 22:00 I’m a Celebrity, Get the station Me Out of Here The reality show is back with a new 23:05 Gogglebox 00:10 batch of campmates Film - Man on a Ledge (12) 02:10 Grand Designs 23:50 News 00:10 Off Their 03:05 Obsessive Rockers 00:40 The Chase Compulsive Cleaners 01:35 Jackpot247 04:00 04:00 Come Dine with Me Motorsport UK 04:50 ITV 05:55 Hugh’s 3 Good Things Nightscreen

20:35 Fail Army Clip show based on the YouTube phenomenon

07:00 Bottom Knocker Street 07:35 Dino Dan: Trek’s Adventures 08:00 Share a Story 08:05 Oddbods 08:10 Sooty 08:25 Super 4 08:40 The Matt Hatter Chronicles 09:00 Marvel’s Avengers Assemble 09:30 Fish Hooks 10:00 Horrible Science 10:25 Murder, She Wrote 11:20 Jeremy Kyle 12:25 News 12:35 Jeremy Kyle 14:30 River Monsters 15:00 Catchphrase 15:45 The X Factor 17:30 The Nation’s Favourite Beatles Number One 19:30 News

13:55 I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here 16:00 Film - A Cinderella Story (PG) 17:55 Film Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous (12) 20:10 Film Bean (PG) 22:00 The Xtra Factor 23:05 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed 23:50 I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here Now ITV3

21:00 Impractical Jokers Hidden camera practical joke show 22:00 Film - Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (12) Years after escaping the clutches of a witch, brother and sister Hansel and Gretel work as soldiers of fortune dedicated to eliminating these forces of evil 23:45 Film - Killer Elite (15) 01:50 Car Crime UK: Caught on Camera 02:15 04:10 Casino Super Eamonn and Ruth: How the Other Half Lives 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Make it Big 05:50 Make it Big

13:50 Columbo: Troubled Waters 15:50 Agatha Christie’s Marple 17:55 Midsomer Murders 19:55 Sunday Night at the Palladium 20:55 By Royal Appointment 22:00 Agatha Christie’s Marple 00:00 Film - Changeling (15) ITV4 13:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live 18:15 Pawn Stars 18:45 Storage Wars 19:45 Snooker: Champion of Champions Live Final 00:15 Film Mickey Blue Eyes (15)

09:00 Trev Massey, 12:00 Gordon Lack, 15:00 Tony De Love



Monday 16th November 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Wanted 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Housing Enforcers Neighbourhood 12:30 Blues 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 The Coroner 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Fake Britain Matt reveals the fake batteries being used in mobile phones, cameras and laptops that can give you more than you bargained for

07:15 My Life on a Plate 08:00 The Edge 08:45 Junior Bake Off 09:15 Escape to the Continent 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 Michel Roux’s Service 15:00 Tennis: ATP World Tour Finals 17:45 The Wonder of Animals 18:15 Antiques 19:00 Roadshow Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two 20:00 Grand Tours of the Scottish Islands Paul Murton visits the Uists and Benbecula 20:30 Only Connect Quiz show

21:00 EastEnders With the University pressure building, Roxy 21:00 show for Quiz Challenge with truth harsh a shares students Ronnie 21:30 Panorama Richard Westcott investigates how Volkswagen used clever computer software to hide just how dirty their cars are 22:00 Crimewatch The Crimewatch team are live with the latest crime investigations, news and appeals, including exclusive new leads in the hunt for sixyear-old Rikki Neave’s killer 23:35 News 23:00 Crimewatch Update 23:45 Film - Meet the Parents (12) 01:25 Weather for the Week Ahead 01:30 News

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Megan thinks Nikhil is going to blow her secret, so she plans to leave the village as soon as she can. At the same time, Jai seethes when Nikhil questions him about what happened with Charity, knowing Megan has blabbed. Jai is shocked when Tanya tells him that Nikhil might now stay on in the village, so he

21:30 Simply Nigella Nigella demonstrates dishes that combine the comfort of the familiar with the excitement of the new, 22:00 London Spy After Danny is accused by the papers of being involved in his lover’s death, he is invited to meet Alex’s parents parents that Alex had told him were dead 23:00 Live at the Apollo 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 The Railway: Keeping Britain on Track 01:15 The Apprentice 02:15 The Great Pottery Throw Down 03:15 This is BBC Two deliberately spikes her drinks as he puts a new plan in motion. Jai takes a drunken Tanya to the B&B, where she falls on the bed sparked out. Jai takes her phone and sends a text to Nikhil, pretending to be from her. It’s clear that Jai is playing dirty to get Nikhil out of his life. In Coronation Street, Michelle reckons Liz has taken leave of her senses. She makes it clear that if Liz chooses to stay with Tony, she and Steve will have no choice but to move away. When Tony calls at Number 11 and announces that he and Liz

The Courier TV Pull-out - 5

07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:30 Come Dine with Me 13:00 News 13:05 Come Dine with Me 14:10 Benchmark 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Homes by the Sea 20:00 Emmerdale Jai 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 sinks to a new low to get rid Come Dine with Me 19:00 of Nikhil The Simpsons 19:30 20:30 Coronation Street Hollyoaks 20:00 News Tony is on his knees for Liz 21:00 Dispatches The 21:00 Countrywise Liz Government has commitBonnin visits some city kids ted to building a million new who are farming on the homes by 2020, but will the breathtaking South Wales rush to put up new housing coast,. Paul Heiney takes result in ugly, poor-quality to the seas off Norfolk on a buildings? lifeboat with a special story to tell, and Ben Fogle trav- 21:30 The Shopper’s els to one of Cornwall’s Guide to Saving Money greatest landmarks, St Kate Quilton heads to a Michael’s Mount, for some jeans factory in Turkey, extreme gardening where expensive designer brands and budget items 21:30 Coronation Street being made in the same Leanne cracks, revealing way, by the same people Simon’s secret 07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Pick Me 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News

22:00 I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here As the celebrities settle into camp life, the next campmate to face the Bushtucker Trial is revealed 23:00 News and Weather 23:45 The Job Lot 00:15 Travel Guides 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Jeremy Kyle 04:55 ITV Nightscreen are back together, Eileen and Jason are both flabbergasted. Eileen tries to make Liz see Tony for what he is - a cheat and liar - but Liz refuses to listen.

22:00 SAS: Who Dares Wins The remaining recruits enter the final stage of the selection 23:00 Fargo 00:15 Million Pound Mega Yachts 01:15 Ramsay’s Hotel Hell 02:05 Lore 03:55 Location, Location, Location 04:55 Benchmark 05:45 Deal or No Deal knee. As Liz reels in shock, Michelle arrives in the pub and is horrified to find Tony mid-proposal! After the break, Horrified at the thought of Liz marrying Tony, Michelle is shellshocked. As Michelle, Erica, Eileen, Tracy and Robert gather round, will Liz accept Tony’s proposal?

Later, Tony presents Liz with a signed contract, giving her his 50% of The Rovers. Liz summons Michelle, ready to break the good news. Telling Liz how he wants a fresh start, Tony goes down on one

Elsewhere, Kate hugs Caz, telling her that she’s the best birthday present she could have wished for. The family celebrate Kate’s birthday in the Bistro. In

Eastenders,

Dean

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ice Road Truckers 13:10 News 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS: New Orleans 16:15 Film - It’s Christmas, Carol 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 The Gadget Show Jon reveals the secret of shopping for online bargains, Amy looks at the future of virtual wardrobes, the Yogcast goes to Comic Con, and the team investigate the latest tech for commuters 21:00 Police Interceptors Justin and Paul chase down a gang of suspected car thieves 22:00 Autopsy Dr Jason Payne-James re-examines the medical facts surrounding the death of the man blessed with astonishing skills on the football pitch and stunning good looks, George Best 23:00 Inside Holloway Prison 00:00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away 01:00 Blinging Up Baby 01:50 Super Casino 04:10 Loch Lomond: A Year in the Wild 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor causes trouble for Ronnie when he shows Sharon, Vincent and Roxy the mess she has made in The Albert. Dean makes a speech to Roxy back at the engagement party, but he also reveals Ronnie’s recent actions and causes her to leave. Back home, the Mitchell sisters clash and Roxy shares a harsh truth with Ronnie, causing upset. Later, Shirley arrives home and tells Dean that she is talking to Mick again, but she is left surprised by his reaction. Soon afterwards, Dean and Roxy get close but it comes to an abrupt end as Dean storms over to The Vic.

07:00 I’m a Celebrity 07:50 Psych 08:30 Coronation Street 09:00 Catchphrase 09:50 Dinner Date 10:50 Psych 11:40 Funniest Ever You’ve Been Framed 12:20 I’m a Celebrity 14:10 Coronation Street 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 Jeremy Kyle 19:00 I’m a Celebrity 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Plebs 23:00 I’m a Celebrity 00:05 Celebrity Juice 00:50 Safeword 01:30 Two and a Half Men 02:25 Scorpion 03:10 Teleshopping ITV3 07:00 George and Mildred 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Murder, She Wrote 09:25 Where the Heart is 10:30 Judge Judy 11:50 A Touch of Frost 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor at Large 17:50 On the Buses 18:20 George and Mildred 18:55 Heartbeat 19:55 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Doc Martin 22:00 Lewis 00:00 A Touch of Frost 02:05 Where the Heart is 03:00 Judge Judy 03:20 ITV3 Nightscreen 03:30 Teleshopping ITV4 07:00 Tommy Cooper 07:25 Gunsmoke 08:20 The Professionals 09:15 Minder 10:15 Gunsmoke 11:20 The Professionals 12:20 The Sweeney 13:20 Minder 14:20 The Chase 15:20 Gunsmoke 16:25 Alias Smith and Jones 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Sweeney 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 Storage Wars New York 22:00 Car Crash Britain 23:00 Benidorm 00:00 River Monsters 01:05 Motorsport UK 02:05 Ax Men 03:05 Minder 03:55 ITV4 Nightscreen 04:00 Teleshopping

08:00 Peter Hurst, 11:00 Dennis Christian, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Andy James, 18:00 Suzy G


Tuesday 17th November

6 - The Courier TV Pull-out

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Wanted 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Housing Enforcers 12:30 Neighbourhood Blues 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 The Coroner 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders Ronnie resorts to drastic measures to protect her sister 21:00 Holby City Cara’s marriage is thrown into sharp focus when her husband’s mistress asks for help 22:00 River River is convinced that Stevie’s investigation into the exploitation of undocumented migrants holds the key to her murder. Further questioning of someone close to the team reveals a system of immigration cases that could lead into some very unexpected places. When a common link to certain businesses is found, it all starts to fall into place for River, with unfortunate repercussions 23:00 News 23:35 Imagine 01:05 Film - The Invisible (12) 02:40 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:45 News

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Tanya is confused and hungover when she awakes to find herself with Jai. She is traumatised to believe that she has cheated on Nikhil. Jai uses this to blackmail her, telling her that he’ll show Nikhil the photos of last night unless she convinces Nikhil to leave the country. Meanwhile, Rhona confides in

07:15 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 08:00 Neighbourhood Blues 08:45 Junior Bake Off 09:15 Great Continental Railway Journeys 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 Michel Roux’s Service 15:00 Tennis: ATP World Tour Finals 17:45 The Wonder of Animals 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip As the challenge returns, John Simpson finds war-related items that remind him of his years on the front line 21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals Six new chefs begin their bid for the Professional MasterChef title 22:00 The Great Pottery Throw Down The potters return to Stoke-on-Trent for more tests of their skills and creativity, all aiming to be named Top Potter 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Earth’s Wildest Waters 01:15 Race to Super Bowl 50 02:00 The Hunt 03:00 Britain’s Ultimate Pilots: Inside the RAF 04:00 This is BBC Two Vanessa about her adoption plans and Paddy’s reticence. Paddy later confides his concerns about adoption to Tess, but she moves in for a kiss. How far will things go this time? Elsewhere, Laurel explains to Nicola that she can’t live with Marlon any longer. However, she can’t afford to rent anywhere else, so Nicola suggests that she should move in with Jimmy to keep an eye on him. Jimmy and Laurel are both unsure about these new living arrangements. In Eastenders, Ronnie arrives to apologise to Dean and Roxy following

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Pick Me 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Jai’s plan looks set to succeed 20:30 International Football:England v France Coverage of the friendly encounter at Wembley Stadium, as the Three Lions take on the hosts of next year’s European Championship. Roy Hodgson’s men came through an admittedly favourable qualifying group with 10 wins out of 10 - the only country to finish with a 100 per cent record. The French didn’t need to qualify for the tournament, so they will see this match as an important step toward their preparations for the summer. Mark Pougatch presents, with analysis from Paul Scholes, Lee Dixon and Ian Wright, and commentary by Clive Tyldesley and Glenn Hoddle (Kick-off 900pm) 23:15 News 23:55 International Football Highlights 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Loose ITV Women 04:50 Nightscreen last night’s events, but she quickly leaves after Dean winds her up. Billy starts to become concerned about Ronnie’s state of mind, so he offers her some words of encouragement and questions how Phil would handle a lowlife like Dean. When Ronnie has clearly been given food for thought, Billy regrets offering this advice as he begins to worry that she may be planning to kill Dean. Later, Ronnie puts her plan into action, so Billy asks Mick to warn Shirley leaving Mick torn about whether he should keep quiet or tell the truth. Soon afterwards, Dean arrives

07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:30 Come Dine with Me 13:00 News 13:05 Come Dine with Me 14:10 Benchmark 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Homes by the Sea 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ice Road Truckers 13:10 News 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Film - The Santa Incident 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 Police Interceptors Justin and Paul chase down a gang of suspected car thieves and it takes seven interceptors to stop a violent thief who tries to sink his teeth into them

21:00 Doctor in Your House Cameras follow Dr Xand van Tulleken as he moves in with the White family for a weekend, during which he gives them a 21:00 Loch Lomond: A unique medical Year in the Wild It’s June at Loch Lomond and 22:00 24 Hours in A and E Trossachs National Park, Lawrence is rushed to St and with the warm temperGeorge’s after being hit by atures come rich pickings a car while crossing the road on a night out in 22:00 Eamonn and Ruth: Eastbourne How the Other Half Lives Eamonn and Ruth meet 23:00 Catastrophe 23:30 one the UK’s wealthiest Tattoo Fixers 00:30 Minted entrepreneurs - Chris in Manchester 01:30 Dawson, CEO of retail PokerstarsCom Shark chain The Range Cage 02:25 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:55 Gillette 23:00 CSI: Cyber 00:00 World Sport 03:25 River The Mysteries of Laura Rat Race Stockton 03:55 01:45 Super Casino 04:10 Chasing Perfection: From GPs: Behind Closed Doors Birth to Starting Line 04:50 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Location, Location, HouseBusters 05:45 Location 05:45 Benchmark House Doctor

Has he made the right decision?

ITV3 07:00 George and Mildred 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Murder, She Wrote 09:25 Where the Heart is 10:30 Judge Judy 11:50 A Touch of Frost 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor at Large 17:50 On the Buses 18:20 George and Mildred 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Doc Martin 22:00 Lewis 00:00 A Touch of Frost 02:10 Where the Heart is ITV4

In Holby City, Cara struggles to maintain focus when Nicole Brady is admitted to AAU asking for help. Nicole has been hiding from her violent husband Sean, who has found out that he’s not the father of their baby.

07:00 Football’s Greatest 07:10 The Sweeney 08:00 Minder 08:55 Alias Smith and Jones 10:25 Gunsmoke 11:35 The Professionals 12:40 The Sweeney 13:45 Pawn Stars 14:45 The Big Fish Off 15:50 Gunsmoke 16:55 Alias Smith and Jones 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Sweeney 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 World Rally Championship Highlights 22:00 Film Tightrope (18) 00:20 Film Unleashed (18)

Learning that the baby’s real father Jed has abandoned Nicole, Cara vows to help - and the story comes to its dramatic finale.

08:00 Peter Hurst, 11:00 Dennis Christian, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Andy James, 18:00 Suzy G

at Ronnie’s house and the pair have a drink together. Dean realises Ronnie is up to no good - but is it already too late? Meanwhile, it’s Lee’s birthday but the atmosphere is tense at The Vic as everyone prepares for Shirley and Buster’s arrival. Linda suggests that Shirley should go suit shopping with Mick and Lee, which she happily agrees with. At the shop, Shirley has a heart-to-heart with Mick and pleads with him to talk to Dean. Later, Mick panics when he spots Dean going into Ronnie’s alone.

07:00 The Hot Desk 07:10 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 07:30 Psych 08:15 Emmerdale 08:50 Coronation Street 09:50 Dinner Date 10:50 Psych 11:40 I’m a Celebrity 12:45 You’ve Been Framed 13:10 Emmerdale 13:45 Coronation Street 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 Jeremy Kyle 19:00 I’m a Celebrity 20:00 You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 I’m a Celebrity 23:00 Celebrity Juice 23:50 Release the Hounds 00:50 Safeword 01:35 Two and a Half Men 02:20 The Vampire Diaries


Wednesday 18th November 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Wanted 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Housing Enforcers 12:30 Neighbourhood Blues 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 The Coroner 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show

07:15 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 08:00 Neighbourhood Blues 08:45 Junior Bake Off 09:15 Simply Nigella 09:45 Terry and Mason’s Great Food Trip 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 12:30 The Daily Politics 14:00 Michel Roux’s Service 15:00 Tennis: ATP World Tour Finals 17:45 Kangaroo Dundee 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two

21:00 Cuffs An adrenalinefuelled Saturday night in Brighton sees the team deal with a drugs death, a stakeout and a dog on cocaine. But it’s a nightclub brawl that causes a personal crisis for Carl

20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip Two Olympic and world champion athletes go head to head in a quest for antiques glory

22:00 The Apprentice Lord Sugar challenges the candidates to open a discount store and, in two days, turn products into profit. Dispatched to Manchester, one team’s squabbling begins en route as they struggle to order popular brand-name products to tempt customers through the door 23:00 News 23:35 Live at the Apollo 00:05 Film 2015 00:35 Film - Oranges and Sunshine (15) 02:15 Weather for the Week Ahead 02:20 News

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Paddy feels guilty but relieved when Rhona tells him that Tess will no longer be Leo’s teaching assistant. Paddy goes to see Tess, who explains that she can’t teach Leo while having a fling with his stepfather at the same time. Both are unaware that

21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals Marcus’s challenges three chefs to prepare scallops in three different ways, and Monica’s testing the other three on their ability to make a sweet sabayon 22:00 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You Dominic explores how British postwar culture demonstrates the same anxieties and preoccupations as Victorian Britain 23:00 The Apprentice: You’re Fired 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Monty Don’s Secret History of the British Garden 01:15 Earth’s Wildest Waters 02:15 Patagonia: Earth’s Secret Paradise 03:15 This is BBC Two Rhona is within earshot, but has she heard? And will the guilt force Paddy into a decision? Dan is proud to reveal the tandem bike he has bought for himself and Kerry to exercise together on, but a healthy lifestyle is the last thing on Amelia and Kerry’s minds as they tuck into a packet of sweets. Can Kerry keep her eating habits a secret much longer, or is Dan about to find out? Harriet is unsettled to see that Ashley’s attention is on Laurel rather than her during the meeting to discuss the village hall. Edna tells Ashley to bank the takings from the village hall, but he gets distracted and puts the money in a

The Courier TV Pull-out - 7

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News and Weather 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Pick Me 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News and Weather

07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:30 Come Dine with Me 13:00 News 13:05 Come Dine with Me 14:10 Benchmark 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Homes by the Sea 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 20:00 Emmerdale Paddy Come Dine with Me 19:00 and Tess have a close The Simpsons 19:30 shave Hollyoaks 20:00 News 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Restoring Britain’s Will Leanne lash out at Landmarks Alastair DickSimon? Cleland visits an unusual Martello tower at 21:00 All Star Mr and Mrs Aldeburgh in Suffolk that is The celebrity couples hopbattling to stay afloat and ing to win the £30,000 prize Anna Keay explores for the charity of their Appleton Water Tower in choice this week are Sandringham Park, Coronation Street’s Mikey North and his fiancee 22:00 Grand Designs Rachael, Bucks Fizz singer Kevin McCloud reveals five Cheryl Baker and her husmore candidates vying to band Steve, and former be crowned Riba House of rugby player Martin Offiah the Year 2015, including a and his fiancee Virginia luxurious city home com22:00 I’m a Celebrity, Get plete with a basement Me Out of Here Ant and swimming pool Dec present the latest action from the jungle. The surprises keep coming as the celebrities adapt to their new jungle life 23:30 News and Weather 00:10 The Jonathan Ross Show 01:15 Jackpot247 04:00 Ejector Seat 04:50 ITV Nightscreen drawer. Rishi’s heart sinks when he sees Jai taking coke again. Jai blames it on Nikhil’s interference. Later, David asks Nikhil to move in with him after hearing about Jai’s blackmailing scam.

23:00 Peep Show 23:30 Toast of London 00:05 24 Hours in A and E 01:05 Best Before 01:35 Film What Richard Did (15) 03:00 Film - The Stranger Wore a Gun (PG) 04:25 Location, Location, Location 05:20 Four Rooms painted on the wall. Guessing it’s Simon’s handiwork, Leanne searches his school bag and finds a can of spray paint. Simon is defiant when Leanne confronts him, goading Leanne about her infertility and calling her an awful mum. Leanne screams at Simon to shut up, on the verge of striking him. Will Leanne lash out? Horrified by her loss of control, a tearful Leanne tells Eva that she can’t cope any longer and thinks Simon would be better off living with Ken.

In Coronation Street, As a crowd gathers outside the Bistro, Leanne is sickened to realise the word ‘whore’ has been spray-

Meanwhile, Jason is shocked when Tony confesses that he and Todd stole and set fire to

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ice Road Truckers 13:10 News 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS: Los Angeles 16:10 Film - Crazy for Christmas (U) 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News the Building 20:00 Canal Panama Documentary that explores the four key technological inventions that made the Panama Canal one of mankind’s greatest engineering marvels Behind GPs: 21:00 Closed Doors Two recently treated patients return seeking more urgent help from the hard-pressed doctors 22:00 Can’t Pay? We’ll Take it Away Stewart and Elmore face a terrible moral dilemma when they find a critically ill toddler at a home they are expected to repossess Worst Britain’s 23:00 Crimes 00:00 Law and Order: Special Victims Unit 00:55 Bullied 01:45 Super Casino 04:10 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the UK 05:00 05:25 SOS Wildlife 05:45 HouseBusters House Doctor Callum’s car. When Tony urges Jason to forget pursuing his own revenge, will Jason agree? Elsewhere, Kate admits to Michelle that although she loves Caz, their relationship can be very intense because they spend so little time together. When Caz suggests an April wedding, all the eyes of her family are on Kate. Will she agree? Also today, Luke summons Jamie to the garage and furiously accuses him of daubing the graffiti on the Bistro as a veiled threat to Steph. When Steph walks in on the row, will Jamie’s dirty tactics be revealed?

07:00 The Hot Desk 07:10 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 07:35 Psych 08:20 Emmerdale 08:50 Totally You’ve Been Framed 09:50 Dinner Date 10:50 Psych 11:40 I’m a Celebrity 12:45 You’ve Been Framed 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 The Cube 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 Jeremy Kyle 19:00 I’m a Celebrity 20:00 You’ve Been Framed 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Keith Lemon’s Back T’future Tribute 23:30 I’m a Celebrity 00:30 The Vampire Diaries 01:30 Two and a Half Men ITV3 07:00 George and Mildred 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Murder, She Wrote 09:25 Where the Heart is 10:30 Judge Judy 11:50 A Touch of Frost 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor at Large 17:50 On the Buses 18:20 George and Mildred 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Doc Martin 22:00 Lewis 00:00 A Touch of Frost 02:10 Where the Heart is ITV4 07:00 Gunsmoke 07:55 The Sweeney 08:45 Minder 09:50 Alias Smith and Jones 10:50 Gunsmoke 11:55 The Professionals 12:55 The Sweeney 14:00 Minder 15:00 Pawn Stars 15:55 Gunsmoke 17:00 Alias Smith and Jones 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Sweeney 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 Storage Wars Texas 22:00 River Monsters 23:00 Film Death Race (15) 01:10 Film - Mickey Blue Eyes (15)

08:00 Peter Hurst, 11:00 Dennis Christian, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Andy James, 18:00 Suzy G


Thursday 19th November

8 - The Courier TV Pull-out

07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The Wanted 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 The Housing Enforcers 12:30 Neighbourhood Blues 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 News 14:45 Doctors 15:15 The Coroner 16:00 Escape to the Country 16:45 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 17:30 Flog It 18:15 Pointless 19:00 News 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders Dean’s family reels from the previous day’s events 21:00 Watchdog The team go undercover to investigate a premium rate phone call firm, a furniture chain charging customers to send back faulty products, and just how safe are the gadget drones flying around above your head? 22:00 Doctor in the House Families worried about their health invite a GP to move in and investigate their lives in the hope he can transform their lifestyles and ensure their future wellbeing. First up is Priti, who is struggling with stress, headaches, weight gain and disrupted sleep 23:00 News 23:35 Question Time 00:35 This Week 01:20 Holiday Weatherview 01:25 News

SOAPS

In Emmerdale, Ashley loses his lifeline when he mislays his notebook and can’t remember what he did with the village hall money. Fingers soon point at Bob, who is shocked when he realises that even Brenda doesn’t seem to be on his side over it.

07:15 Len and Ainsley’s Big Food Adventure 08:00 Neighbourhood Blues 08:45 Junior Bake Off 09:15 The Great British Bake Off Masterclass 10:15 Victoria Derbyshire 12:00 News 13:00 The Daily Politics 14:00 Michel Roux’s Service 15:00 Tennis: ATP World Tour Finals 17:45 Kangaroo Dundee 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip Nicholas Parsons takes on Gyles Brandreth, travelling around Surrey before going head to head at an auction in Watford, Hertfordshire 21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals Six chefs battle it out in the quarterfinal, in which the judges ask them to make a dessert of their own invention 22:00 The Last Kingdom In rescuing his new wife Mildrith from suspected abduction, Uhtred is drawn into battle with the Danes 23:00 Russell Howard’s Good News 23:30 Newsnight 00:15 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 01:15 Panorama 01:45 Dominic Sandbrook: Let Us Entertain You 02:45 Doctor Who 03:30 This is BBC Two Bob later finds Ashley’s notebook and sees all of his notes and instructions. Bob confronts Ashley over the book, prompting him to make a shocking confession. After the break, Bob is stunned by Ashley’s confession, but is determined to be there for his friend especially when he learns that Ashley has a hospital appointment for his official test results. Bob accompanies Ashley into the consultant’s room, where he is given his diagnosis. Ashley is told that he has Early Onset Vascular Dementia. Ashley is distraught, knowing how bleak his future is now set to be.

07:00 Good Morning Britain 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Jeremy Kyle 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 News 15:00 Judge Rinder 16:00 Pick Me 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 News 20:00 Emmerdale Ashley’s mistake has consequences 20:30 Tonight Fiona Foster investigates claims in a recent World Health Organisation report that suggests consuming processed meat can cause cancer and eating red meat can also be associated with the deadly disease 21:00 Emmerdale Paddy knows he needs to finish things with Tess 21:30 Paul O’Grady: For The Love of Dogs Paul meets labrador-lurcher cross puppy Pluto who has an extremely rare medical condition meaning he cannot swallow food properly 22:00 I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here The jungle throws yet more surprises at the unsuspecting campmates 23:05 News and Weather 23:45 The Late Debate 00:15 River Monsters 00:45 Birds of a Feather 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen Bob urges Ashley to tell Harriet his secret. Later, as Ashley prepares himself, Harriet unwittingly makes a comment that stops him in his tracks. It’s all too much for him and Ashley privately breaks down in despair as his world starts to implode. Meanwhile, Bernice and Kerry have smashed the tandem into the church. Bernice is worried about her wrist, but there is true fear from Kerry. Bernice and James are shocked to realise that Kerry is being serious, as she thinks she has gone blind. Kerry fears she has a brain tumour but on getting to the hospital, the doctor has other news. Kerry is

07:00 Countdown 07:45 3rd Rock from the Sun 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:30 Come Dine with Me 13:00 News 13:05 Come Dine with Me 14:10 Benchmark 15:10 Deal or No Deal 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Homes by the Sea 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 News 21:00 The Secret Life of 5 Year Olds following three groups of youngsters moves on to the five-yearolds, who are extending their vocabularies, learning how to make friends and getting an emerging sense of the group and their place within it 22:00 Kitchen Impossible with Michel Roux Jr Michel’s trainees must strike out on their own and face the final hurdle - finding a job 23:00 First Dates 00:05 Gogglebox 01:05 SAS: Who Dares Wins 02:05 Embarrassing Bodies 03:00 Food Unwrapped 03:25 Dispatches 03:55 Unreported World 04:20 Four Rooms 05:15 Location, Location, Location told that she has Diabetic Retinopathy and the blindness is down to her poor diet and lifestyle. She’s shocked to learn that she needs an operation, so will this be her wake-up call? Also, Zak and Joannie work together to manipulate Cain into caring for Kyle.

07:00 Milkshake 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:20 Film - Dear Santa 14:10 News 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Film The Christmas Secret 18:00 News 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 News 20:00 Secrets of Great British Castles Dan Jones heads to Gwynedd to explore the history of Caernarfon Castle, the building of which began in 1283 on the orders of Edward I 21:00 Springbreak Shark Attack The story of a sustained series of unprecedented shark attacks in Mexico in 2008, in the popular tourist destination of Zihuatanejo on the Pacific coast 22:00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the UK Ben heads to Wales to meet 61-year-old Emma Orbach, and discovers why this Oxford University graduate abandoned ‘modern’ Britain, her family home and even her marriage 23:00 Film - The Wild Geese (15) 01:35 Super Casino 04:10 Ice Road Truckers 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor Shirley also realise something serious is going on and they rush to rescue Dean, but will they get there in time? Later, Shirley discovers that Mick knew about Ronnie’s plans and failed to warn her. As Mick shares a heartwarming speech about his family, Shirley confronts Mick and forces him to admit the truth. Elsewhere, Honey turns to Les for advice about her relationship with Billy and eventually comes clean to Billy.

In Eastenders, A guilty Mick comes clean to Linda about Dean being in imminent danger. Buster and

Also today, Vincent learns of Fatboy’s behaviour towards Donna and takes shocking action.

07:00 Alesha Dixon: The Hot Desk 07:10 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 07:35 Psych 08:20 Emmerdale 08:50 Coronation Street 09:20 Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records 09:50 Dinner Date 10:50 Psych 11:40 I’m a Celebrity 13:10 Emmerdale 13:40 Coronation Street 14:15 You’ve Been Framed 14:40 Dinner Date 15:40 Jeremy Kyle 18:00 You’ve Been Framed 18:30 I’m a Celebrity 20:00 The Xtra Factor 21:00 Two and a Half Men 22:00 Scorpion 23:05 I’m a Celebrity 00:05 Celebrity Juice 00:50 Safeword ITV3 07:00 George and Mildred 07:25 Heartbeat 08:30 Murder, She Wrote 09:25 Where the Heart is 10:30 Judge Judy 11:55 A Touch of Frost 14:00 Heartbeat 15:05 Wild at Heart 16:10 Where the Heart is 17:15 Doctor at Large 17:50 On the Buses 18:20 George and Mildred 18:55 Heartbeat 20:00 Murder, She Wrote 21:00 Doc Martin 22:00 Lewis 00:00 A Touch of Frost ITV4 07:00 Gunsmoke 07:55 The Sweeney 08:50 Minder 09:50 Alias Smith and Jones 10:55 Gunsmoke 12:00 The Professionals 13:00 The Sweeney 14:00 Minder 15:00 Pawn Stars 15:55 Gunsmoke 17:00 Alias Smith and Jones 18:00 The Professionals 19:00 The Sweeney 20:00 Pawn Stars 21:00 Deals, Wheels and Steals 21:30 Deals, Wheels and Steals 22:00 Fifth Gear 23:00 Being Kevin Pietersen 00:00 Film - The Long Kiss Goodnight (18)

08:00 Peter Hurst, 11:00 Dennis Christian, 13:00 Alex Trelinski, 16:00 Andy James, 18:00 Suzy G


10 - The Courier TV Pull-out

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 12 represents N and 10 represents Q, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Freight (5) 4 Pre-Soviet Russian ruler (4) 9 Not of the church (7) 10 Beneath (5) 11 Sprite (3) 12 Concur (5) 14 Annoyed (5) 15 Called for (5) 16 Capital of the Ukraine (4) 18 Thought (4) 20 Country in NE Africa (5) 22 Regulations (5) 23 Sailing boat (5) 25 Owed (3) 26 Furnishings (5) 27 Branch of mathematics (7) 29 Raps (4)

30 Shabby (5)

Down 1 Unconcerned (6) 2 Happen again (5) 3 Nocturnal bird of prey (3) 5 Foolishness (9) 6 Needlessly time-consuming procedure (3,4) 7 Type of cactus (7,4) 8 Terse (5) 13 Listen in (9) 17 Unlawful (7) 19 Primitive (5) 21 Stable (6) 24 Thick rope of wire (5) 28 American term for petrol (3)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1/1D Crew cut, 3 Pious, 8 Terrain, 9 Cuffs, 10 Style, 11 Surmise, 12 Insist, 14 Briefs, 17 Traitor, 19 Press, 21 Spike, 22 Tarnish, 24 Mites, 25 Jest. Down: 2 Early, 3 Punish, 4 Occur, 5 Suffice, 6 Labels, 7 Assesses, 10 Skittish, 13 Stadium, 15 Report, 16 Gratis, 18 Theft, 20 Elite, 23 Hat.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Can prigs change grating? (8) 5 Never loses new still (4) 9 Plenty follow old church cats (7) 10 Well-mannered for the community (5) 11 Moan about meat (4) 12 Date for Roman candles to be ordered (7) 15 Substitute Torres for Roll (6) 16 Supplicant getting food in bar (6) 19 There, in charge, unorthodox dissident (7) 21 Girl with an article for the fete (4) 24 Angry, as seen in Muhammad Ali video (5) 25 Noticed it's blemished (7) 26 Indian region harbours unknown painter (4) 27 Pet - a cold one perhaps (8)

Down 1 Bern yobs mistakenly have airs and graces (8) 2 No Tai fire-eaters made joints (7) 3 A mere game (4) 4 Some of Anna's sauce recipes are for a popular resort (6) 6 If you're so bright, what is six plus six plus 500? (5) 7 Have faith in royal Cambridge city (4) 8 Currently surrendered and formally agreed to a truce (7) 13 He's in beads and tops (7) 14 Material making instrument stop functioning (8) 17 Head of government rabbited on, agreed? (7) 18 Feast I cook for a party (6) 20 Diplomatic representative in a maiden voyage (5) 22 Beat note record (4) 23 Old bird's repeating word of encouragement (4)

STANDARD CLUES Across 1 Scratching repeatedly (8) 5 At any time (4) 9 Leopard-like cats (7) 10 Courteous (5) 11 Cattle meat (4) 12 First of a Roman month (7) 15 List of names (6) 16 Mendicant (6) 19 Freethinker (7) 21 Festive party (4) 24 Enraged (5) 25 Glimpsed (7) 26 Spanish painter (17461828) (4) 27 Fondle or pet affectionately (8)

Down 1 Condescension (8) 2 Marijuana cigarettes (7) 3 Small pond (4) 4 Capital of the Bahamas (6) 6 Bright-coloured (5) 7 Depend upon (4) 8 Went along with (7) 13 Decapitates (7) 14 Sheer stiff muslin (8) 17 Let have (7) 18 Spanish celebration (6) 20 Diplomat (5) 22 Beat severely (4) 23 Extinct, flightless bird (4)

Last weeks Solution Across: 8 Drastic, 9 Olive, 10 Syndicate, 11 Cod, 12 Brie, 13 Early on, 16 Insipid, 19 Sofa, 22 Nor, 23 Porcelain, 24 Stark, 25 Sets off. Down: 1 Odist, 2 Earner, 3 Strike up, 4 Scrape, 5 More, 6 Bitchy, 7 Bedding, 14 Respects, 15 Pianist, 17 Serial, 18 Duress, 20 Flagon, 21 Knife, 23 Peke.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words Ma My 3 letter words Add Eel Gas Ire Lea Mow Oft Rat 4 letter words Able Acre Aery Alee

Also Arco Cans Coda Cone Diet Digs Edit Else Espy Ides Line Loaf Lode Near Onto Pans Rare Roar Rock

Sane Skye Slap Soon Span Tree Yaws Yore 5 letter words Acorn Amber Aspic Awash Beige Coast Elate Idler Manse Modes

Motet Newel Saner Saves Scant Scold Scram Spree Stage Staid Stare Steed Stern Stone Store Story Tasty Toady 6 letter words

Ascend Assign Banish Barely Eatery Listed Stereo Stolen 8 letter words Ceremony Strident 9 letter words Moviegoer Sailboard

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Smooth (skin) (5) 4 Paintbrush (art) (6) 9 Lawyer (7) 10 Pecho (tórax) (5) 11 Proyecto (intención) (4) 12 Happiness (cheerfulness) (7) 13 Coche (automóvil) (3) 14 Side (of person) (4) 16 Seguro (convencido) (4) 18 Abeja (3) 20 Enemy (7) 21 Dawn (4) 24 Playing card (5) 25 Uña de pie (7) 26 Estación (parte del año) (6) 27 Melodías (música) (5)

Down 1 Sellos (Correos) (6) 2 Now (at this time, immediately) (5) 3 Age (of person, animal, building) (4) 5 Aumentar (tamaño) (8) 6 Más claro (7) 7 Letters (of alphabet) (6) 8 To fly (5) 13 Cook (chef) (8) 15 Avenue (7) 17 Combs (for hair) (6) 18 Barcas (5) 19 Cockerels (6) 22 Aprender (5) 23 Cinturón (4)


The Courier TV Pull-out - 11 Across 1 Early radio and television series starring Jack Webb as Los Angeles police detective, Sergeant Joe Friday (7) 5 Order to appear before a judge or magistrate, or the writ containing such an order (7) 8 Longest French river that rises in the Massif Central and flows north and west to the Atlantic Ocean (5) 9 American country and rockabilly singer and songwriter who topped the UK singles chart in 1958 with Whole Lotta Woman: Marvin --------- (9) 11 Heavy beams formerly used in breaching fortifications (9,4) 13 Widespread coniferous tree that has a distinctive conical shape and hanging cones, widely grown for timber, pulp, and Christmas trees (6) 16 Severe headache or other after-effects caused by drinking an excess of alcohol (8)

18 General who commanded the Carthaginian army in the second Punic War (8) 19 Surname of English admiral who defeated the French fleets of Napoleon but was mortally wounded at Trafalgar (1758-1805) (6) 24 Divulge confidential information or secrets (5,3,5) 26 Actors' and workmen's entrance from the street to the area of a theatre (5,4) 27 Able to move quickly and easily (5) 28 Perfumed liquid made of essential oils and alcohol (7) 29 Cosmic explosion that is hypothesised to have marked the origin of the universe (3,4) Down 1 Surname of French composer and organist whose best-known works are the ballets Coppélia (1870) and Sylvia (1876) (7)

SUDOKU (Medium)

Quiz Word

2 2004 biopic based on the life of entrepreneur Howard Hughes: The ------(7) 3 Daughter of one's

brother or sister (5) 4 Round root with white or cream flesh which is eaten as a vegetable and also has edible leaves (6)

5 Sixties British children's 'Supermarionation' television series, created by Gerry and Sylvia Anderson featuring a highly-sophisticated combat submarine built for speed and manoeuvrability, the flag vessel of the World Aquanaut Security Patrol (WASP) (8) 6 English conspirator who claimed that there was a Jesuit plot to assassinate Charles II: Titus ----- (5) 7 First name shared by former Governor of Alaska, Palin and former wife of Prince Andrew (5) 10 Quarrel noisily, angrily or disruptively (7) 12 Basic unit of money in Uruguay, Mexico, Cuba, Colombia and Chile (4) 14 Sweet yellowish- or brownish-green edible fruit that is narrow at the stalk and wider towards the base (4) 15 Style or method of cooking, especially as characteristic of a particular country, region, or

establishment (7) 17 American keyboard instrument resembling an organ but with the notes produced by steam whistles, formerly used on showboats and in travelling fairs (8) 20 Ability to sustain prolonged physical or mental effort (7) 21 Fund of money put by as a reserve (4,3) 22 Angel of the second order whose gift is knowledge who is usually portrayed as a winged child (6) 23 Simple high-level computer programming language that uses familiar English words, designed for beginners and formerly used widely (5) 24 Mollusc with a single spiral shell into which the whole body can be withdrawn (5) 25 Surname shared by English folk musician, Billy and English broadcaster and author, Melvyn (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

THE GRADUATION

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

abrazar

el escenario

aplaudir

el fotógrafo

bailar

el logro

besar

emocionarse

celebrar

hacer un brindis

el birrete

la toga

el champan

llorar

el diploma

los invitados

el discurso

orgullosa

music QUIZ

ANSEWRS 1. The Kings Of Rythm 2. Texas 3. Fame 4. KBE 5. Cher 6. Francis Rossi 7. Purple Rain 8. 7 9. Will Young 10. Voice Of An Angel

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1/26 Rush hour, 3 Stag beetle, 10 Diapers, 11 Premier, 12 Diploma, 13 Stogie, 15 Ivory, 16 Euphemism, 18 Alligator, 21 Ellis, 23 Gallop, 25 Shikoku, 27 Obelisk, 28 Okinawa, 29 Rose Garden, 30 Adze. Down: 1 Red admiral, 2 Shampoo, 4 Testament, 5 Gapes, 6 Eyesore, 7 Tbilisi, 8 Ezra, 9 Memory, 14 Emasculate, 17 Periscope, 19 Loafers, 20 Gelding, 21 Elixir, 22 Leopard, 24 Poker.

Empareja estas palabras - Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.abrazar, 2.aplaudir, 3.bailar,

18.orgullosa.

m.the champagne, n.the stage,

4.besar, 5.celebrar, 6.el birrete,

o.to get emotional,

7.el champan, 8.el diploma,

a.to kiss, b.the guests,

p.to make a toast, q.to hug,

9.el discurso, 10.el escenario,

c.the speech, d.to celebrate,

r.the award.

11.el fotógrafo, 12.el logro,

e.the gown, f.to dance,

13.emocionarse,

g.the cap, h.the achievement,

14.hacer un brindis, 15.la toga,

i.the photographer, j.to cry,

16.llorar, 17.los invitados,

k.proud, l.to applaud,

Soduko

Span - Eng

Quizword

Answers: 1g, 2l, 3f, 4a, 5d, 6q, 7m, 8r, 9c, 10n, 11i, 12h, 13o, 14p, 15e, 16j, 17b, 18k.

1. Who Is Generally Regarded As Producing The First Rock N Roll Single 'Rocket 88' In 1950? 2. Which Us State Is Mentioned In The Lyrics To The Tony Christie Song Amarillo? 3. What John Lennon/David Bowie single went to #1 in 1975? 4. Following His Honorary Knighthood, What Letters Is Bob Geldof Entitled To Put After His Name? 5. Cherilyn Sarkisian Lapiere Is The Real Name Of Which Singer? 6. What Is The Name Of The Lead Singer Of Staus Quo? 7. What Prince Single Was Also The Name Of His Semi Autobiographical Film? 8. How Many Members Are There Of The Band 'The Pussy Cat Dolls'? 9. Which 'Pop Idol' contestant was the first to reach number one in the UK singles charts? 10. What Was The Name Of Singer Charlotte Church's Debut Album?

Fill It In


12

Friday 13th November 2015

A Right Workout For

Hi all from TKO Teddy and I’m so busy, I really need to keep nice and fit to keep my energy levels going, which was a good reason to meet up with Jason and the team at Fit 4 All in Punta Prima, and they really did put me through my paces! I then went a bit posh to meet the British Ambassador, Simon Manley, who was making a visit to the new Samaritans in Spain drop-in centre. Simon even posed for

a super photo, so we have Mr.Manley on the left of me, plus local vice-consul Lloyd Milen (who told me he’s got a nice new job); to the left of Lloyd there’s a lady called Belinda Coombes (director of UK Trade and Development); and next to her there’s the President of Samaritans in Spain, Ed Purcell, whilst on my other side, there’s the British consul for Alicante, Sarah-Jane Morris. I did whisper in her ear that I

wouldn’t mind an MBE sometime, so let’s see what happens! You know that I love kids, and there were loads of them that rolled up at CD Torrevieja’s training night at the Vicente Garcia stadium recently. I was lucky to get out alive! If you want to meet me, I’m a very sociable bear. Just get in touch via my Facebook page, TKO Teddy! Have a good week. tkoteddy@tko.media or Telephone 664315470.

90.8fm & 91.9fm

TRELI ON THE TELLY WITH ALEX TRELINSKI

Didn’t you just want to give Lady Mary a good smack in the chops over the way she treated her sister Edith by blabbing over Marigold to her future husband in last Sunday’s Downton Abbey? It was the final “regular” Sunday outing ahead of the “wrap-up” Christmas special, and it was in serious danger of very much being a happy ending all round, what with Mary getting married and Thomas being rescued from taking his own life. I was also convinced that Maggie Smith’s Dowager would not return alive from her foreign travels, but I suspect that the Grim Reaper will be paying a call at Christmas. You can’t knock Downton Abbey for all of the high entertainment value it has given us over the years and a whole galaxy of characters that you can relate to. That’s no easy trick to pull off and Julian Fellowes has done it in a show that, alongside

Sisters Are Just Doing It

Doctor Who, is the biggest British international TV hit around. A mention of last Saturday’s Who would not go amiss as well, with a fantastic sequence of well over five minutes when Peter Capaldi simply gave a great speech on morality and values. I loved David Tennant and Matt Smith but can somebody please tell me why the even-better Capaldi isn’t being showered with the same number of awards that they were? I honestly think that is one of the best autumn seasons for new UK TV drama that I’ve seen in long while, and we now welcome new Monday night BBC 2 series, London Spy, with a top cast led by Ben Whishaw, who we last saw on the box in the wronglycancelled, The Hour. We’ve sex, spooks, and the perfect murder all packaged up with some top performers like Jim Broadbent and Charlotte Rampling. What with University

Challenge and the return of Live At The Apollo, BBC 2 Monday nights are looking very tasty. Welsh legend Sir Tom Jones must have had a chuckle over last weekend's news that the BBC have lost the rights to The Voice as from 2017. Revenge indeed for his ham-firsted handled sacking but no great surprise as

the production company that makes the show has been bought by ITV, and so it appears to be a perfect replacement for The X Factor which has been losing viewers hand over fist. That's a shame as its still good fun, but the fact is that Dancing On Ice was scrapped when the audience figures it had were far higher, and though nothing

official has been said about the fate of The X Factor, I suspect that it will be "rested", a polite word for saying "pulled". What ITV though need to do over The Voice is to be bold and stop being obsessed with the weekend. Why not run it on a Tuesday and a Wednesday night to give viewers something to look forward to? In the States and here in Spain, The Voice and many key entertainment shows like the US version of Strictly Come Dancing are run mid-week to big audiences, and since losing all their live European soccer, ITV have a hole to fill, so why not try to be a little bit different and put on some entertainment? As Simon Cowell would say, just an idea! By the way, the BBC will be disappointed but at the same time delighted, as some of their opponents have been critical that the broadcaster paid good money in the first place to

get the Voice, so this will placate the BBC-bashers! As a BBC fan there've been many things in the last week done so well by the best broadcaster in the world. The Remembrance commemoration coverage is taken for granted but the Beeb get it just right, and they are peerless in the world of nature documentaries, with The Hunt narrated by the great Sir David Attenborough. Last Sunday's scene with the polar bear was memorable and it's turning out to be an exceptional series made by the same team that brought us Planet Earth. There's a cracking little drama hidden away on the FOX UK channel called Tyrant, all to do with an American national returning to a Middle East state run by his brother, who he falls out with and rivalry ensues. It comes from the team behind Homeland, and there are many things about it that ring true.


Homes & Gardens +

Torrevieja Flower Club We welcome contributions from anybody interested in community based groups and are happy to feature your events here. The Homes and Gardens pull-out is available in The Courier every four weeks, where we will happily showcase your activities. If you would like to contribute any helpful advice or tips related to Homes and Gardens, we welcome these too, just email office@thecourier.es and leave the rest

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Friday 13th November 2015

Blooming Christmas

to us. This time, we are focussing on the Torrevieja Flower Club who are having a Christmas demonstration by Sandra Ramm on Wednesday 18th November at 2.0 pm. at the Asturias Restaurant, N332 Punta Prima. Guests and old members are very welcome. If you would like more information you can call Sandra Lambe on 966 848 220 or Jennie Woodward on 965 723 843.

There are many different flowers that seem to pop up over the festive season. Interestingly, they differ from country to country and even across continent. The Poinsettia, Christmas cactus, holly, Christmas rose, ivy, and of course mistletoe, all form a major part of traditional Christmas decoration. Poinsettia The ancient Aztecs (ruling tribe in central Mexico at the time of contact with Europe) prized the poinsettia as a symbol of purity. Centuries later, Mexico's early Christians adopted the poinsettia as their prized Christmas Eve flower. The Mexican poinsettia, known as the Christmas Flower in

North America, is used in most Christmas decorations, owing to its bright red color and its blooming season coinciding with the Christmas holiday season. However, florist dye them in common colors or even add shimmers to make them much more visually engaging during Christmas. Christmas cactus Christmas cactus, also known as orchid cactus, often blooms around Christmas time. Pendulous stems of Christmas cactus make it a great choice for hanging baskets. There are a number of different cactus species sold as "Christmas cactus." Christmas rose

One plant called Christmas rose is regarded as a true Christmas flower in certain parts of the world. Christmas rose (Serissa) is also known as the "snow rose" or "winter rose." Originally from tropical regions of Asia, cultivated Serissa often blooms during the winter. On the occasion of Christmas Eve, it is traditional for young women in North America to exchange specially designed Christmas roses with each other resembling their spirit of fraternity. Holly Holly is the plant most associated with Christmas in many European countries. Holly wreaths are hung on doors, and sprigs of holly

used to trim Christmas puddings. Ivy Like most of the other Christmas flowers, ivy leaves symbolize eternity and resurrection. The ivy leaf has been associated with the Egyptian God, Osiris, and the GrecoRoman god, Attis; both of whom were resurrected from the dead. Mistletoe Mistletoe is a Christmas plant whose origin is said to date back to the Pagans. Druid priests used this Christmas plant two hundred years before the birth of Christ in their winter celebrations. A more modern tradition is to exchange kisses under a sprig of mistletoe.


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Friday 13th November 2015

Homes & Gardens

+

Travel the World - Bond Style

Nobody travels quite the way 007 does. When you have an unlimited budget, premium service is expected. Fortunately, you don't need to have quite as much money as Bond does to live out your secret agent dreams. Popular travel website skyscanner.net explains more. Exotic locations, luxury hotels, and fancy gadgets, it’s all part of the job when you’re the world’s most famous secret agent. James Bond has been captivating audiences on screen for more than 50 years and has given us a serious case of travel lust. Well you too can travel like Bond if you’re a little creative.

Live his lifestyle without dodging bullets, or breaking the bank, and know that these tips aren’t for your eyes only. How to get a free upgrade No super spy ever flies economy; it's first and upper class only. Even though you don’t have an unlimited budget from her Majesty’s Secret Service, you might be able to score an upgrade for free. If you’re a frequent flyer, try to be as loyal as you can to a single airline and their partners. Join their loyalty program and collect points anyway you can. It may take some time for you to get a free flight, but airlines will

always upgrade loyal flyers first. Flexibility can also work in your favour. Airlines purposely overbook some flights; this happens when the airline books more passengers than available seats. If this happens, the airline will offer passengers with a confirmed seat travel vouchers worth hundreds of dollars if they volunteer to be bumped onto the next available flight. Drink like Bond If Bond chooses his airline based on drink selection, then Virgin Atlantic would be on the top of his list. Upper class passengers on Virgin Atlantic have access to a futuristic on-board bar where they can sit, socialise, and of course order Bond’s favourite drink; a Vesper, shaken, not stirred (as featured in Quantum of Solace). Even if you’re not flying in upper class, you can still get a cocktail fix at 30,000ft by creating your own when the drinks trolley arrives. For instance mix orange juice, Tequilla and Sprite for a spin on the traditional margarita or combine Baileys and vodka for a DIY version of a White Russian. Sadly you will have to stir rather than shake these cocktails. Fly private for a reasonable price Nothing screams super cool like flying on a private jet, and you now don’t need

to be rich and famous to do so. Private jet companies have started to implement last-minute deals that are available to everyone. Jetsuite.com is a private jet flight aggregator that operates to more than 2,000 airports. If you’re willing to travel the next day, and are able to rent the entire plane which seats 6, you can get some pretty cheap fares per person. These low rates are offered because those flights may have been empty or not full anyways. Companies would rather make some money, than no money. What’s the best part of flying private? No security lines or pat downs. Oh so tech The Apple Watch may not shoot out lasers, but Q himself would be impressed by the features. Manage your entire trip through your timepiece with apps such as TripAdvisor, Expedia, Uber, Tripit and much more. You can even unlock your hotel room door with your Apple Watch at select Starwood properties. They may not look that stylish when wearing them on the plane, but these ultratechy jet lag preventing glasses will have you arriving at your destination fresh and ready to hit the casino's. We could never imagine 007's luggage getting lost in

transit and make sure you don't either. Keep a track of your luggage at all times with this connected carry-on. You never know who's attention you might have attracted. And for those who want the all out real Bond experience there always the Skyfall suitcase collection. No gadgets or gizmos here, just classic style. Staying in style 007’s choice of hotels may be beyond the budget of common travellers, but with Skyscanner’s amenities filter, you can pick a hotel and reenact your favourite Bond scenes. Find a hotel with a hot tub

and try to be as cool as Sean Connery was when Fiona Volpe had a simple request for him in Thunderball. Perhaps you’re more of a Casino Royale fan; select a hotel where you can play Texas holdem. In Skyfall, Bond went for a swim in the hotel pool in Shanghai; well in real life that hotel was the Four Seasons Hotel at Canary Wharf in London so maybe you can live like Bond for a night after all. Amenities aren’t the only filter option available; sort by price, star rating, location, cancellation policy, and much more; a secret agent does need to keep his options open.


Homes & Gardens +

Friday 13th November 2015

It´s a Dog´s Day

So, you´ve successfully built your car port (see page 4), having obtained all the necessary licences and permissions of course, and now you have some offcuts of wood left over. The question of what to do with them might be a simple one, especially if you´re a dog owner. Essentially a box with an entrance, you can make your K9 home into a castle using some simple techniques. A sloped roof, just like the car port, will help

the flow of rain water, but check where that water will land. Try to raise your kennel off the ground for the same reason, we don´t want water seeping into the woodwork. Windows might be useful too but if you´re planning on having your dog stay in the kennel then windows can result in cold or rain coming in. For the summer, a window might provide some welcome cooling. Depending on the amount of wood left over

you could create a feeding station and maybe even a little bunk bed, although this could prove problematic if your dog is the size of Scooby Doo for example. As a final tip, make sure you check every piece of wood for splinters, broken pieces and protruding screws or nails. The last thing you want is to ruin the joy that your doggy pal experiences by causing injury from your efforts to build a castle for your King or Queen.

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Friday13th November 2015

Homes & Gardens +


Friday13th November 2015

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1

Friday 13th November 2015

Brits can't get enough of toast Toast has long been a great British favourite

Food & Drink Ivy’s Strawberry Daiquiri & Sherry Darling Cocktails

Dessert

Citrus & Pomegranate Salad Ingredients For the dressing: 5 tsp white wine vinegar, 4 tsp clear honey, salt and freshly ground black pepper, 5 tbsp extra virgin olive oil, 1 small red chilli, cut in half. For the salad: 4 small oranges, peeled & segmented, 2 ruby grapefruit, peeled, pith removed, segmented, 1 plain grapefruit, peeled, pith removed, segmented, 1 small red onion, peeled, very finely sliced, bunch fresh mint leaves, torn, 1 pomegranate Directions For the chilli-honey dressing, mix together the vinegar and honey in a serving bowl until well combined. Gradually whisk in the oil, using a fork, then add the chilli and whisk again. Add more vinegar or oil, to taste. For the salad, arrange the segmented fruit in a broad shallow bowl. Sprinkle over the onion and mint, then pour over the chilli-honey dressing and mix well until it coats the salad. Sprinkle the Pomegranate seeds over salad.

Toast is a British love. We scoff it for breakfast, snack on it, wait for a slice to pop when we need to be soothed and when we’re ill. A couple of years ago, toast love spread Stateside. San Franciscan restaurants developed “Toast Bar” menus and critics touted the $3 slice of artisanal toast as proof that this food-obsessed city had become a parody of itself. It seems the craze started in a small café called Trouble, where slices of toast, far from being a trend with a big price tag, had come to prominence for more profound reasons. The woman behind Trouble actually started the café as a way to cope with depression. Toast (Trouble’s speciality flavour is cinnamon)

had been one of the comforting “constants” in her life – so that’s what her café sold. Soon she had queues around the block. We Britons can claim a greater toast history than California. We’ve been putting interesting things on toast since the Middle Ages (“pokerounce”, toast topped with hot honey, ginger and cinnamon, sounds particularly good, as does quince purée with flower water, and sweetened meats). Then there are “savouries”, specifically English toast treats (topped with anchovies, grated cheese and ham) served at the end of dinner, beloved of the Victorians and Edwardians. Some (Welsh rarebit, for example) still survive.

I asked food historian Dr Annie Gray why toast was so popular. “We’ve always had a big bread culture in this country. Toast is a sensible way of using the remains of the loaf from the day before – it’s thrifty. The kind of bread we like here lasts quite well, unlike French baguette, which is basically so hard the day after it’s made it’s impossible to do anything with it.” Part of toast’s importance here also has to do with the great British breakfast. “In the 18th century,” Gray says, “dinner was eaten at 2pm, so you didn’t need to start the day with anything substantial. But in the 19th, when the main meal moved to 6 or 7pm, so for breakfast toast was the mainstay.”

A reminder of summer to help us through cooler months. At the Ivy, we garnish it with balsamic pearls, a mint leaf and a wooden spoon; at home, a mint leaf and a teaspoon will more than do. Per serving: 50ml three-year-old Havana Club, Juice of 1 small lime, 2½ tsp sugar syrup, 1 scoop strawberry sorbet, Mint leaf, to garnish. Put the rum, lime and syrup in a shaker with ice, shake hard and strain into a small glass bottle or jug. Put the sorbet in a chilled coupe glass, pour over the cocktail, garnish and serve. The pre-dinner sherry gets a 21st-century makeover in this

refreshingly fruity cocktail. Gone are the days when a pre-dinner sherry meant a room-temperature Harveys Bristol Cream. And I’ll drink to that any day. Per serving: ½ lemon, ¼ orange, 50ml sherry, 25ml sugar syrup (made with equal quantities of water and sugar), 1 slice each lemon and orange, to garnish. Cut the lemon and orange into chunks, and put in a highball glass. Muddle (ie, squash, to press out the juice), then add all the other ingredients and top with crushed/cracked ice. Swizzle, top up again with ice, garnish with a slice each of lemon and orange, and serve.


Food & Drink

37

Friday 13th November 2015

Why Meat Geeks Have Gone Mad For 17-Year-Old Steak “Super ageing” or “extreme ageing” is an obsession of the steak aficionado

Steak used to be simple. Back in the glory days of The Berni Inn chain – which pretty much defined the UK steakhouse in the Sixties – the choice was between rump or fillet if you were feeling fancy. Sirloin came later and was considered “unusual”. A decade or so ago, when chef Angela Hartnett told me her favourite steak was a rib eye, it sounded exotic. These days, however, it’s about far more than the cut. There are health issues to wrestle with: the World Health Organisation sounded a warning bell last month and recent research suggests eating just one steak a week increases the risk of bowel cancer by more than two-fifths. At the same time, many experts advise against giving up red meat, given that it is a rich source of energy and essential nutrients. Moderation, then, would appear to be the key. And if you are eating just one steak a week, it might as well be the juiciest and tastiest hunk of meat you can afford. But you need a degree in bovine biology to get to grips with the bamboozling range available now. There’s the breed: Aberdeen Angus, Hereford, Dexter, Wagyu, to name just four. Then there is the animal’s

feed to consider: is it environmentally friendly grass, middle-ground grain or – unsustainable but producing succulent flesh – corn? I’m not finished yet. The length that the meat is hung or aged, to tenderise it and develop the flavour, is another factor. But is it wetaged (in a vacuum pack) or dry-hung? The latter is a process that reduces the weight of the animal, and so the butcher’s profit, but it produces a flavour most connoisseurs prefer. And now there is one more question to add to the list. How old was the animal your steak came from? And if that sounds like rampant ageism, it is – right now, foodies are going wild for old Spanish cows. That’s old, as in animals that are eight years plus. Most British cattle are slaughtered before they reach two and a half, the age deemed “safe” in the aftermath of the BSE crisis, although the rules are now being relaxed. Restaurants like London’s Kitty Fisher’s and Chiltern Firehouse, Levanter in Manchester and Bellita in Bristol are selling steaks from middle-aged beef, from animals as old as 17 in some cases. According to Nemanja Borjanovic, the Serbian born owner of London restaurants Lurra

and Donostia, who imports the beef through his company Txuleta (pronounced chew-letter), older animals give a very different meat, far darker in colour than the pinky-red meat from younger animals that we see in supermarkets. Its flavour is deeper, stronger and, says Borjanovic, “it has length, like wine. The taste stays with you”. The meat is imported from one of two districts in Spain, Galicia or the Basque Country. The Galician beef comes from animals called Galician Blond, and the prized meat comes from old bullocks (castrated males). “They are very hard to find, as there’s no reason to keep a castrated bull for 10 or 15 years, except as a pet,” says Borjanovic. “We usually get about 10 or 15 a year.” The fat is very yellow, from the beta carotene in the grass of the cattle pastures, and it speckles the meat “like raindrops”, he adds, “because it is slow growing, unlike the big gobbets of fat you get from corn-fed animals.” Basque meat comes from dairy cows who have reached the end of their useful milking life at about four years and are then given four more years “retirement”, when they are fed up or “finished” to improve the meat quality and develop

fat. Because the Basque and Galician meat has become popular at the same time, there has been some confusion but, as Borjanovic says sternly, “If you are told that your steak is an old Galician milker, then that is wrong. The Galician beef is never from dairy herds.” It’s not common practice to eat dairy animals in most countries, as they have less meat on them, and small prime cuts, which makes them uneconomical to fatten up. But the Basque have a long tradition of eating dairy steak, which they call Txuleton (pronounced chew-le-ton), particularly in their cider house eateries. And no wonder – it has the much sought-after heavy fat marbling that gives flavour and succulence to the meat, as well as that flavour from the older animal. Got all that? Now it gets more confusing. The Txuleton steak, despite being known as Basque, is from cows who never actually live in the Basque Country. They are raised and fattened in their country of origin, generally Germany, Austria or Poland, and meet their ends there too. After that, the carcasses

are sent to the Basque Country, which until recently was the only market for this relatively expensive steak. It’s from here that they are imported into Britain generally for further ageing, as the Spanish tend not to hang their meat for more than 1420 days. “Super ageing” or “extreme ageing” is the other obsession of the steak aficionado: 14 to 30 days is common in the UK but more and more butchers are taking this further, inspired by the likes of Peruvian butcher Renzo Garibaldi who ages some of his meat for 300 days, while the Northern Irish meat merchant Peter Hannan, who supplies Mark Hix’s London restaurants, goes as far as 365 days. It’s not for everyone – the

meat picks up distinctly fermented blue cheese flavours, although there should be no mould – but I’d include myself among those who find it delicious, albeit completely different to an ordinary grilled steak. Borjanovic combines the older meat with longer ageing due to demand from chefs like Nuno Mendes of Taberna del Mercado and Chiltern Firehouse, for whom he is ageing 17-yearold Portuguese Barossa (a similar breed to Galician Blond) beef for 150 days. But he is more excited by a project to take elderly, unproductive British organic dairy cows and fatten them for the prime meat market. It’s early days, he says, but they should know if it is viable by next summer.


38

Health

Friday 13th November 2015

How To Maximise Your Health Tips on simple ways you can improve your health

Eat at the same time every day. The body likes a strict routine. Eat erratically or go to bed and get up at inconsistent times day in, day out, and you will negatively affect hormone levels. It’s been shown, for example, that constant grazing increases the risk of diabetes. Your body needs to anticipate what’s happening to it so that it can be prepared. Never wear shoes that hurt your feet. And always get your flu jab. They may sound unrelated, but both stop your body suffering periods of inflammation. We’re only just teasing out what inflammation is doing to our health, but it’s extremely likely that it has a role in the development of heart disease and cancer. If you reduce the amount of inflammation you suffer the

healthier you will be. Only shop at the edges of the supermarket: that’s where the unprocessed, natural foods are. The food that is going to maximise your health is fresh, real and sold without a label. Once you go into the middle the products are more likely to be packaged, and to contain ingredients you can’t pronounce and that your body absolutely doesn’t need. And don’t juice – it causes the fruit and vegetables to oxidise and degrade faster, reducing any health benefits. Stand up whenever you can. It’s the thing I’ve changed most about my behaviour in the past year or two. When it comes to negative effects on health, sitting is as dangerous as smoking. Even going to the gym doesn’t fully counteract the changes in measures of

things it causes, such as blood fats or blood sugar. I stand when I’m on the phone, conduct at least two meetings each week as walking meetings, when we go outside and walk as we talk. And I try to get up and move about as much as I can in the day.Be the person who knows your body best. We should all know measurements such as our blood pressure and blood sugar – we should be aware of how our body looks and feels so we can pinpoint any changes quickly. Also, we need to be in tune with our bodies, to know which foods suit us and which don’t. Finally, be aware of your family history – if you have cancer, heart disease or any other diseases in your family you should be actively taking steps to reduce your own risk of developing them.

Remedies That Are Still Healing Us The discovery, the antimalarial artemisinin, derived from wormwood, is credited with saving millions of lives. From opium in poppies, to quinine derived from the cinchona tree, to digoxin from foxgloves, there are many gems unearthed from the past that have true testable medical benefits. In fact, there is now a whole branch of science dedicated to the study of traditional medicine, ethnopharmacology. But it is not as simple as

isolating the active ingredient from a plant. Apart from the fact lots of these plants in their raw form are poisonous, making useful drugs for a population requires planning and sufficient raw material. Milkweed: The white sap from this common weed, also known as petty spurge, was described by Nicolas Culpeper's Complete Herbalist (1826) as "a good treatment for warts". Don't try this at home, however, as its also an irri-

tant. Milkweed made its way from its native Europe to Australia, where biochemist Dr Jim Aylward had it in his garden. In 1997, Dr Aylward isolated its active ingredient, ingenol mebutate, which he discovered was toxic to rapidly replicating human tissue. And recent clinical trials of Picato, a gel derived from milkweed sap, suggest it is effective at stopping lesions turning into skin cancer. Willow: Both the Ancient

Egyptians and Hipocrates recommended using the bark of a willow tree for pain relief. Its effectiveness was eventually proven in a study by the Royal Society in 1763. But it was not until 1915 that drugs giant Bayer started selling it over the counter as aspirin. It is now the subject of between 700 and 1,000 clinical studies each year. And recent advances have shown it is far more than just a painkiller. From reducing the risk of

strokes to indications it could help prevent cancer, aspirin is the traditional remedy that keeps on giving. Snowdrops, Galantamine, derived from snowdrops and now used to treat Alzheimer's disease, was first investigated by the Soviet Union, - but folk law tells of Bulgarians rubbing the flowers on their forehead to cure headaches. Prof Heinrich says: "They were almost certainly used in traditional medicine before the Soviet's started investigating in the 50s.

Six races that are also holidays The North Face Cappadocia Ultra Trail (CUT) is located in a region known for its troglodyte dwellings – hand-carved caves dug out of the soft rock in central Turkey. Looking out, it may seem that there is just an arid landscape, but as soon as you venture into it you find hidden valleys, full of lush vegetation, caves, tunnels, rivers and trails, all begging to be explored. I have stayed in a few caves in my time, in the Arctic Circle, the Canary islands and elsewhere, but none have been as luxurious as those in Cappadocia. The Kayakapi Premium caves were like a five-star hotel built into a piece of history in Urgup, where the CUT starts and finishes. The first 62km of the race – also an event in its own right – winds through the Goreme national park taking the runners along trails that go deep into the valley floors, through tunnels and under

waterfalls. It is not your usual trail race. The second half is more suited to fell runners, with flags marking a course across hillsides without trail, up gorges and over rocky landscapes. From hot air balloons, touring underground caves and experiencing fine Turkish food, as well as eating your bodyweight in Turkish delight, it occured to be that this is more than just a race, it is a holiday too. So where have you made a race into a proper break? Here are five other of my favourite holiday races. The OMM (the Original Mountain Marathon) Racing and camping built into one, a mountain marathon is the complete experience – and what’s more, it’s in a different location every year. A (literal) dirty weekend away. Geneva Course de Escalade One on the road but a

huge variety of races up to eight kilometres around Geneva’s old town. The noncompetitive Marmite race is for all – it’s not about speed, but how good your costume is. Ronda del Cims One of the toughest 100milers around, in rarely visited Andorra. This also has races from 10km upwards for all the family. Carlos Sa Nature Trail

From three to eight days exploring Northern Portugal’s mountains, you see things you never would on your own, eat with friends every night and hope it doesn’t rain all the time. Mont Blanc Weekend With the vertical kilometre (VK), 10km, 23km, 42km and 80km in Chamonix, come with friends or family. There is even a Mini Cross for children.


Health Dr M. Mannu

39

Friday 13th November 2015

Strong legs contribute to a healthier brain in old age Contact@medb.es

Website: www.medb.es

Simple lifestyle changes to our physical activity may help to keep us both mentally and physically healthy Scientists have discovered a link between strong legs and a fit brain that resists the effects of ageing. Researchers found a “striking protective relationship” between high leg power and better preserved mental ability and brain structure over a period of 10 years. Because identical twins share the same genes, differences between them can be traced to environmental factors, such as keeping physically fit. The study’s lead scientist, Dr Claire Steves, who is a lecturer in twin research at King’s College London, said: “It’s compelling to see such differences in cognition and brain structure in identical twins, who had different leg power 10 years before. It suggests that simple lifestyle changes to boost our physical activity may help to keep us both mentally and physically healthy.” The scientists studied a sample of 324 volunteer

female twins with an average age of 55 over a 10year period from 1999, looking at various factors related to health and lifestyle. The results, published in the journal Gerontology, showed that leg power was more closely linked to agerelated changes in mental function than any other lifestyle factor tested.

How to Manage Gastroenteritis Eating out is one of the joys of living in Spain, but it sometimes comes with a price, contracting stomach flu. In general most stomach flu or gastroenteritis resolve within 24 - 48 hours, however, if not properly managed, the may cause serious complications. Gastroenteritis occurs from inflammation of the stomach or intestine usually from a virus or a bacteria but also from irritating chemicals, causing abdominal pain and cramps, nausea, vomiting, diarrhoea. Viral gastroenteritis resolves very quickly, within 48 hours. The causative viruses, typically rotavirus and adenovirus, reproduce very quickly, pro-

ducing a lot of toxins that inflame the gut. Bacteria Enterococcus faecium is a common cause of gastroenteritis and contracted by cross contamination, foods and water. Infections are common from restaurants, perhaps from the failure of staff to observe strict hygiene. Gastroenteritis caused by bacteria tends to cause more serious symptoms and takes a longer time to resolve. Think back to the last food or drink you had, perhaps you ate out in a restaurant or had a takeaway or an unusual meal at home. Gastroenteritis usually starts a few hours after a meal, nor-

mally with cramps, that may gradually progress to abdominal pain and then diarrhoea or loose stool. Taking medications such as Imodium to stop from passing loose stool will make symptoms worse as the toxins from the microbes which your body is trying to eliminate will become trapped inside your intestines. Drinking as much water as possible, with a pinch of salt, is a helpful way to replace lost fluids and prevent dehydration. You should seek help if your symptoms persist for more than 48 hours. FOR A FULL BODY DIAGNOSTIC SCAN CALL MEDB CLINIC: 965071745.


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Friday 13th November 2015

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain eight years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Chris wanted to know how to add a signature to TIP: How to take a screen shot of something. Windows Live Mail Hi Richard, can you help with a problem? How do i put an email ‘signature’ on the outgoing mail on the new windows live mail? Hopefully you will have one of you miracle cures for me! Thanks, regards, Chris.

Q A

Hi Chris, you didn’t mention what version so you have so I am going to assume you have Windows Live Mail 2011 - if you don’t have 2011 then upgrade it for free at http://explore.live.com/windows-live-mail.

To create a signature (a standard sign off at the bottom of all your email messages) do the following… 1. Launch Windows Live Mail 2. Click the blue button in the top left of the window 3. Select Options (at the bottom of the drop down list 4. Click Mail and the following screen will be shown… 5. Click Signatures and add your information to the Signature Settings area 6. Once done click OK and you’re done.

ADVICE: Jackie was having some trouble with Internet Explorer displaying incorrectly Richard, I don’t know why but when I go online on my netbook, the image is bigger than the screen so I can’t see the toolbar at the top and therefore can’t get off whatever web page I am on. It hasn’t always been like this. What have I done to cause this? The computer is working fine apart from that.

Q A

Hi Jackie, it wasn’t at first obvious to me what your problem was, however after a quick phone call it was clear that you had inadvertently pressed the F11 button whilst using Internet Explorer. What this does is place the program in “full screen” mode and it removes the navigation bars from the top and bottom leaving you with just the web page. It can be pretty disconcerting if you don’t know you have done it, but just pressing the F11 button again will put things back to how they should be.

I am asked, as I am sure you can imagine, many questions all day relating to computer,IT and gadget things. Most of the time people who have problems with their computers have an error message appear on the screen but they don’t have the time or means with which to make a note of the exact error message – and it’s the “exact” error message that really helps people like me find the answer to the problem, so here is a great tip that will allow you to take a copy of the whole screen or just the bit with the error in it.

To take a full screen shot Press and hold the CTRL key (bottom left or bottom right of the keyboard), with that key held down, press and release the “PRT SC” key (“IMP PANT” on Spanish keyboards). This will seemingly do nothing, you don’t get a bleep or a flash of the screen or anything, but trust me, you have just copied the whole screen. For the technical amongst you, this copy has been placed into the Windows Clipboard. Now all you have to do is fire up any kind of word processor or graphics package (Microsoft Word for example or OpenOffice Writer if you don’t have Word) and then just hit the paste button (or hold CTRL and press V once) and your screen copy will be pasted.

To take a screen shot of the active item on the screen only Follow the instructions above but rather than pressing CTRL and “PRT SC” press ALT and “PRT SC” and this is take a copy of the active window, perhaps it will be an error message box on the screen that you want to send to your computer guy? From there you just follow the same instructions and paste the item that you have copied into a word processor or graphics package and then you can send that file to whoever you want to see the screen shot as an attachment to an email.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.


41

Friday 13th November 2015

New Range Rover Evoque Convertible

Range Rover has released details, images and video of the Evoque Convertible, which is billed as the world’s first luxury compact SUV convertible. It has a lightweight fabric roof that unfurls in 21 seconds and folds away in 18 seconds, at up to 30mph. When lowered, the roof sits flush with the four-seater’s bodywork and it doesn’t affect the load space. Land Rover also claims that this fifth member of the Range Rover family is as adept off-road as any other Evoque. Range Rover is launching high-specification models first, namely the HSE Dynamic and HSE Dynamic

LUX, which are available with 2.0-litre petrol and diesel engines. The Range Rover Evoque Convertible goes on sale in spring 2016, costing from 62,300€ for the TD4 HSE Dynamic. It also features Jaguar

Land Rover’s next-generation entertainment system, with a 10.2in touchscreen. Roll-over safety comprises two aluminium beams hidden in the rear bodywork which deploy within 90 milliseconds. Gerry McGovern, Land Rover's design director, said: “The Range Rover Evoque Convertible is a vehicle for all seasons. Its uniquely distinctive design and world-class engineering adds another dimension to the Range Rover family, further enhancing its desirability and appeal.” The Evoque Convertible will be produced at Land Rover’s Halewood factory in the UK alongside other Range Rover models.

New Electronic ITV Certificates This Week From this week, new vehicles registered in Spain will have an electronic version of the technical characteristics document, rather than the traditional paper or card version. The new tarjeta electrónica de características técnicas (eITV) will automatically be issued with the vehicle for all newly registered cars, vans and trucks from Wednesday 11th November, 2015. All previously registered vehicle will continue to use the paper and card documentation. The DGT has already implemented a system whereas manufacturers, importers and vehicle sales companies can submit the registration information by electronic means, which can be accessed and checked by officials. Once checked and validated, the DGT will store the information in an electronic register, known as the Registro de Vehículos Prematriculados, which in

turn issues the vehicle identification number, the Número de Identificación del Vehículo (NIVE), which then becomes the unique identifier for that vehicle. The DGT will then assign the registration number of the vehicle and issue the Tarjeta de Inspección Técnica, or technical inspection card, in electronic form only, which can be accessed on-line. The vast majority of vehicle manufacturers are already integrated into the project and in October, nearly 50% of registered vehicles are already

equipped with electronic tokens. As of May 11, 2016, this type of electronic card will also be issued for mopeds, motorcycles, tricycles and quads. Remember though, this is only for newly registered vehicles, those already on the roads and registered are not affected by this change. If your vehicle has the paper version, you must carry this document with you in the vehicle. For more motoring advice visit n332.es and follow n332 on Facebook for up to date information.


42

Classifieds

Friday 13th November 2015 ALARMS

CATERING

CLEANERS CAR BREAKERS

REMOVALS

PLUMBER CARPENTER

SURVEYOR

DRAINAGE

ALCOHOLICS

WELDER

TUTOR

SWIMMING POOL SERVICES

RADIO COSTA INTERNATIONAL MEDIA needs selfemployed salesperson. Car, mobile phone and client base available. For more info call 685 901 265 or email info@radiocosta.eu

SERVICES

Maybe

Gardening, property maintenance, translations, cheap rates call David 722521654.

CHURCH SERVICES Torrevieja Christian Fellowship at Avenida de las Cortes Valencianas 68, Torrevieja 03183, welcome residents and visitors alike, to their friendly and lively 10.30 am. Service each Sunday morning. They will not be holding the Wednesday night meeting at 6.00 pm. For further information and/or directions please telephone 966700391 or visit our website on www.tcf-spain.org. International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in

Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo.Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276

TUITION Guitar lessons for beginners, as well as improvers. Provide an insight into most musical styles. From 10€ per hour. Learn how to play guitar with the best lessons available,. for both beginner guitar and advanced players telephone Peter NOW on 966789612 or 629975378.

How about

SITUATIONS VACANT

Or

REMOVALS Van leaving from UK TO SPAIN November 15th, Returning SPAIN TO UK November 22nd Space available. Telephone Spanish Number 0034 722 711 998 or UK Number 0044 755 298 5343 or please email me at keithvanman9@gmail.com

SWIMMING POOL SERVICES

QUIZ MASTER Experienced quiz-master /question setter with personality If you would like a quiz master that is interesting and entertaining, questions that are challenging yet not too difficult so as to be ungettable available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel: 664 838 581.

REMOVALS


Friday 13th November 2015 Friday 30th October 2015

Rugby Round Up

ITV Vega Baja Orihuela prop up the bottom of the Murcia Rugby Federation first division after losing 2917 away to Albacete, with Orihuela just having a point to their name from their

three matches this season. The San Javier Squalos meanwhile notched up their second win of the current campaign in the second division to make it successive victories with a 22

Quick Peddlers Six riders representing Cyclogical in Quesada recently took part in a six-up Team Time Trial event in Alhama de Murcia. The aim was to complete the 20 kilometre course as quickly as possible with the final time taken when the third team member passes the finishing line. The team finished fourth clocking up a time of 29 minutes and 24 seconds to finish the event which was organised by CC La Purisma. Nine teams took park on a cold grey morning with a flat course featuring a short but

sharp gradient halfway through it to test the team’s ability to stay together. Two of the Cyclogical team peeled off at that stage, with the remaining four riders working well until the 18 kilometre mark, when another rider dropped off, leaving the requisite three riders to reach the finish line in a very creditable performance, considering the ages of the team. The Cyclogical team was Dave Brown, Keith Bayford, Peter Lambon, Alan Quearns, Les Orton and Ged Lacey.

points to 5 win at Totana. The San Javier women’s team made it a double celebration for the Squalos, with a resounding 55-nil result at CRU Cartagena. Torrevieja Tigers lead the

under-18 cadetes league, after being victorious 40-5 at CRU Cartagena, but Vega Baja Orihuela (pictured above) went down 35-22 at Totana.

43


44

Friday 13th November 2015

Ivie Davies on Golf

There’s Something In The Air It is rumoured that the European Tour is going to drastically shake up its qualification process, and only require players to compete in five standard tournaments to retain their full status on the tour. World Golf Championship (WGC) events and majors would also be dropped as counting events for membership. At the moment players need to appear in 13 events a year to retain their European Tour membership, and be eligible for a Ryder Cup place. Within those 13 events are the four majors and four WGC

events, so if they no longer count it will be of great benefit to players who are outside the world’s top 50. Keith Pelley, the tour’s recently appointed CEO, will announce his plans immediately before the European Tour season concludes next week at the DP World Tour Championship in Dubai. There are also changes muted that the European Tour will move away from the week after week conventional 72 holes stroke-play event. It’s also no secret that Pelley wants to do something rather than do nothing

and one of those things is to introduce more Matchplay competitions, I have mentioned shorter games, but also time-related contests are being talked about so that the public can relate to the time where players are in danger of taking too long over a shot. His proposed changes are not surprising as he used to be President of The Sports Network TV channel in his native Canada; so he knows what works on TV and perhaps thinks it should be lively as the latest bunch of young players

such as Rory McIlroy, Jordan Spieth, and Ricky Fowler. Not everyone goes along with his thinking though, as more Matchplay will bring into question from professionals the amount of travel and the possibility of having to travel half way around the world for just a single day of competition. I am sure that Pelley is considering the fans feelings as well as that of the tour. Many will remember the day when Tiger Woods was eliminated after the first round of the WGC-Accenture Match Play competition and the

event from then on was like a lead balloon. David Howell says he is not averse to a bit more man to man combat, but he is not too sure. In his opinion, people who enjoy golf are quite happy with the status quo. Innovations have been tried and never really worked. Whilst there are apparently other options being discussed the five-event proposal is believed to be a clear leader. This approach would benefit players who are outside of the top 50 at the start of the season to plan their schedule in

advance to include five European Tour events, without having to try and factor in events that they may well not be a part of. And it would put an end to the likes of Ian Poulter having to make a last minute mad dash to Hong Kong. It is known that Pelley is very keen to find a way to entice Paul Casey back onto the European Tour, and this would be a very workable solution. Paul loves the Ryder Cup, and I for one, would love to be able to see him in the team and teeing it up at Hazeltine next year.

Knox Knocking At The Door Victory at the WGCHSBC Champions event in Shanghai meant a first career-changing European Tour title for Russell Knox. He could move into the top30 on the Official World Golf Ranking and will be exempt for both the PGA

and European Tours and will play in The Masters. Just a few years ago, Knox was trying to make his way on the mini tours in the US and now he’s a World Golf Championship winner. Two weeks ago, he didn't even expect to be playing

in Shanghai. A spot then only opened up when J.B. Holmes withdrew, but Knox still needed to obtain a visa for China. Enter Knox's wife, Andrea. She filled out the required paperwork and set up a last-minute meeting with the Chinese con-

TITTER ON THE TEE KNOW YOUR RULES The NHS has just released the results of a £200 million research study completed under a grant from the joint services of Weight Watchers, Cambridge Diet and Slim Fast. The new study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it. The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. "Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?" she asked the instructor. "P-u-t-t is correct," he replied. "Put means to place a thing where you want it. Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing."

QUESTION

A player’s ball is resting against the flagstick, but it is not holed because all of it is not below the level of the lip of the hole. However, the player, believing the ball is holed, picks it up. What is the ruling?

ANSWER

sulate in Malaysia. But her duties weren't done. Since Knox's caddie didn't have as smooth of a time getting into the country, Andrea had to carry her husband's bag for his lone practice round at the Sheshan International GC.

"My wife was a superstar," said Knox, and if you're wondering why he couldn't carry himself, it's because he has a bad back -- yet another factor that made him an improbable contender. Not that it was easy for his helpful spouse.

Malnati Wins First PGA Tour Title

The player incurs a penalty stroke under Rule 20-1 for lifting his ball without marking its position. The player must replace the ball against the flagstick and may then apply Rule 17-4.

Peter Malnati joined the list of first-time winners on the PGA Tour after snatching a one-shot victory at the Sanderson Farms Championship in Jackson. After the first four events of the season produced maiden champions, Malnati made it five in a row as a composed five-under 67 in the weather-delayed final

round gave him a winning score of 18 under par. The players returned to the Country Club of Jackson early on Monday morning to complete their third rounds, and veteran David Toms and rising star Patton Kizzire both returned 66s to earn the 54-hole lead as halfway pace-setter Roberto Castro fell away with a 75.


The Courier Sport

45

Friday 13th November 2015

European Championship Qualifiers

Friday 13th November 20:45 Bosnia and Herzegovina v Republic of Ireland

Internationals

Relief For Torry

Friday 13th November 18:30 19:30 20:30 20:45 20:45 20:45 20:45 20:45 20:45 21:00

Qatar v Turkey Luxembourg v Greece Czech Republic v Serbia Belgium v Italy Northern Ireland v Latvia Poland v Iceland Slovakia v Switzerland Spain v England Wales v Netherlands France v Germany

European Championship Qualifiers

CD TORREVIEJA 2 UD BENIGAMIN 1 Torrevieja can go to this Sunday’s match at Bunol with a little bit more of a spring in their step after last weekend’s home win over fellow-strugglers, Benigamin. It’s doubly important as Bunol are just below Torry in the table, so a second victory on the trot can make life a little bit more comfortable, though sadly at this stage still a far cry away from the dreams of making an end of season play-off slot. But who knows if they can string so wins

together and last Sunday was a start. After being unlucky not to get something from their previous match at Torre Levante, Torrevieja were cruising two-nil ahead at the Vicente Garcia Stadium, until former Torry striker Koeman pulled one back with half an hour to go, causing nerve ends to get a little bit fraid. Before that, Torry saw Ruben Suarez once again in breath-taking form as he was fouled and then took the free kick that

was beautifully headed home by Quintero in the 20th minute. Then just after the restart he laid the ball on for Javi Selvas to give Torry a two goal advantage. Lewis Allen impressed again, though his great play and work effort is not translating into goals, which he must remedy soon if he is to retain his place from the outset. Nonetheless, his was another performance brimming with energy and talent. Suarez has added much needed guile and cre-

ativity to attacks and has been an inspired late signing. So the result moved Torry two places up in the table with Sunday’s match at Bunol to come with a 5.00pm kick-off. The next home fixture against Paterna on Sunday November 22nd has been moved to the Nelson Mandela Stadium, also with a 5.00pm start. The switch allows work to be done on the pitch at the Vicente Garcia Stadium.

Roll Up! Roll Up! FORMENTERA CF 1 CD MONTESINOS 3

Saturday 14th November 18:00 Ukraine v Slovenia 20:45 v Sweden v Denmark

Sky Bet League 1 Saturday 14th November 13:30 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00 16:00

Rochdale v Wigan Athletic Barnsley v Port Vale Blackpool v Doncaster Rovers Bradford City v Crewe Alexandra Burton Albion v Millwall Chesterfield v Oldham Athletic Colchester United v Coventry City Gillingham v Bury Peterborough United v Fleetwood Town Sheffield United v Southend United Shrewsbury Town v Walsall Swindon Town v Scunthorpe United

European Championship Qualifiers Sunday 15th November 20:45 Hungary v Norway

Monday 16th November 20:45 Republic of Ireland v Bosnia and Herzegovina

Tuesday 17th November 20:45 Denmark v Sweden 20:45 Slovenia v Ukraine Montesinos came away with the points helped by a slice of luck and a referee that at times appeared to be auditioning for a clown vacancy at the Moscow State Circus. Formentera started the brighter but Monte had the first good chance producing a fine save from a Carlos shot, and then M&A shooting wide. The home side produced a great breakaway move down the right side with a perfect pass and shot giving Lopez no chance as Formentera went ahead. Monte though continued to press at the other end and

after some good saves, the home keeper could not keep out a Macan header from a perfectly flighted Marcos free kick. The referee though started to show signs of instability towards the end of the half as he lost control after tempers got frayed with M&A being yellow carded. All that was missing in the second half from the referee’s perspective was a performing sea lion and clownmake up as the match official would have ended up being a good stand-in for Charlie Cairoli at the old Blackpool Tower circus. In a

CD Torrevieja player Juanma Acevedo has been told that he can leave the club after being asked to be released from his contract. Juanma has played in just 11

matches, three of those as a substitute. The 23-year-old joined Torry earlier this year from Castillo, having previously had stints with Hercules and Elche Ilicitano.

Juanma Leaves Torry

mental aberration, the referee decided to give Monte a penalty amidst furious and justified complaints from the Formentera players. But the comedy reached custard pie throwing proportions when M&A put the ball on the spot for the kick but then had it moved by an opposing player. M&A then went to replace the ball but got booked for the second time, apparently for time-wasting, and got sent-off into the bargain, which meant Marcos took the resultant converted penalty. Monte manager, Roberto, seethed at the “Comic Cuts” official and

was sent packing with a redcard from the dugout after the official proved that he could understand the basic Spanish language. Formentera saw their chance against 10-man Monte but Lopez produced a string of top saves, whilst at the other end a great solo run from Macan was denied by the home keeper, with Wallace(on for Macan) then producing a great late strike to seal the deal. Fifth in the table Montesinos now entertain Grupo Caliche this Sunday afternoon with a 4.00pm kick-off.

Torry Army Dates The Torry Army is the long-established international supporters club that follow CD Torrevieja, and they’ve put together some seasonal events to get everybody into the Christmas spirit over the next few weeks. The Torry Army Christmas Lunch will take place at the Marina Bar, Toretta 2, Torrevieja on Friday December 11th at 1.00pm, with a threecourse meal costing 15 euros per person. The Christmas Dance featuring music from the group, Timeless, will be at Casa Ventura in San Luis, Torrevieja on Wednesday December 16th, from

9.00pm. There’ll be a buffet besides the entertainment with the cost being 12 euros for members and 14 euros for non-members. Ahead of those dates, the Torry Army are putting on a Skittles Challenge at Casa Ventura which will also feature a basket meal, all for the cost of just four euros. The fun starts on Saturday November 28th at 8.00pm. If you are interested in learning more about the Torry Army and coming along to the events, then just put your name down at the Torry Army office in San Luis, or ring the office on 966 784 111 or call Pat Stewart on 966 786 352.


46

Friday 13th November 2015

Neymar On Fire BARCELONA 3 VILLARREAL 0

Back In Contention ELCHE 2 OSASUNA 1

The Courier Sport

JURGEN LIVERPOOL 1- 2 CRYSTAL PALACE

KLOPP ALONE!!!

anager Liverpool m felt a pp s id he Jurgen Klo e th in ld e fi An "alone" at -1 2 ges of the closing sta defeat by lace. Crystal Pa Neymar scored a fantastic individual goal as Barcelona warmed up for El Clasico with victory at home to Villarreal last Sunday which took them to the top of La Liga last Sunday, with Real Madrid faltering at Sevilla. The Brazilian wrapped up the win in stunning fashion, collecting a pass from Luis Suarez, flicking the ball over a defender's head and then volleying into the net. He had earlier broken Villarreal's stubborn resistance on the hour mark, coolly finishing from Sergio Busquets' pass. Suarez doubled the advantage from the penalty spot after a reckless challenge from Jaume Costa on Munir El Haddadi. The win is Barca's fourth in a row in La Liga and sets them up well for the trip to Real Madrid on November 21, after the international break.

Leaders Replaced SEVILLA 3 REAL MADRID 2

Rafa Benitez lamented Real Madrid's inability to "manage the situation" as they suffered their first defeat of the season against Sevilla, which meant they surrendered the league leadership to Barcelona last Sunday. The visitors dominated the opening half an hour and deservedly took the lead through a bicycle kick from Sergio Ramos. However, Sevilla hit back with goals from Immobile, Banega and Llorente, before James Rodriguez netted a late consolation. "It looked as if the game was under control, but it turned out it wasn't," Benitez said. "In the second half we lacked consistency and didn't know how to manage the situation.” Benitez was without first-choice goalkeeper Keylor Navas, defender Marcelo and striker Karim Benzema, while Ramos was forced off just moments after scoring with a shoulder injury, and the coach is hopeful his stricken players will recover in time for the Clasico on Saturday November 21st. "We have time for the missing players to return. [The Clasico] is a unique game and I hope that the team will react well after this defeat," Benitez added.

Moyes Sacked Ex- Manchester United boss David Moyes was shown his cards on Monday as manager of La Liga strugglers Real Sociedad, just a day short of his oneyear anniversary at the club. He’s been replaced by former Barcelona manager, Eusebio Sacristan, on a deal that runs until June 2017. Real are only outside the relegation zone on goal difference and last week’s defeat at Las Palmas was their fourth in five league games.

A second-half penalty from Ilie secured a win for Elche in front of 10 thousand spectators last Sunday against an Osasuna side there were reduced to 10 men for the last half hour of the match. Osasuna went ahead with just 30 seconds on the clock as Pucko seized on a poor defensive clearance from a corner to volley the ball into the back of the net, giving keeper Javi Jiménez no chance. The Ilicitanos responded strongly after the early setback and were rewarded with their equaliser from Sergio León in the 13th minute. After the early excitement, the intensity dropped with both teams being scared to make a mistake for the rest of the first half. Elche looked more determined in the second period and looked far more likely to score than Osasuna, and then got the bonus of Javier Flaño being sent off on the hour mark for a second bookable offence, which put the visitors on the back foot. Substitutes Pelayo Novo and Álex Moreno increased the intensity for the Ilicitanos who then bagged the points from the penalty spot with 13 minutes remaining. With victory secured against one of the Segunda division promotion contenders, Elche have another chance to make progress tomorrow evening (Saturday)when they’re away to fifthplaced Lugo who are just one point ahead of the Ilicitanos in the table. The match kicks-off at 8.15pm.

Blatter In Hospital MORE FREEDOM z has

artine Roberto M y d coach Ro n la urged Eng s s o R give Hodgson to freedom to re o m y Barkle self in the express him friendlies. upcoming

Suspended Fifa president Sepp Blatter is in hospital after what has been called a "small emotional breakdown". Blatter, 79, who has led world football's governing body for 18 years, was provisionally suspended for 90 days last month amid a corruption scandal. It is understood he suffered what has been called "a nervous shock" but is expected to make a full recovery. Blatter is set to remain in hospital until next Tuesday after being admitted initially for a checkup last week. Five days ago, Blatter's lawyer Richard Cullen said the Swiss had undergone stress-related health checks in hospital, but added: "He is fine and expects to be home shortly."

Fabregas Hits Back Cesc Fabregas says he feels targeted by the Chelsea critics because he was one of the club's top performers last season. The 28-year-old, currently on international duty with Spain, was a key figure for the champions last term, creating 95 chances and recording 18 assists in the Premier League. But he has set up a team-mate just once so far for a side that has slumped to 16th and the former Barcelona man admits he has been made to feel more culpable than most. "If you play well you are the first to have the finger pointed at you when things are going badly," he said. "When things go well you are the best and when things go wrong you are finished, you are useless. "Those of us who have been most criticised are Eden Hazard, Diego


John McGregor on Sport

Friday 13th November 2015

47

BLASTS EARLY EXITS D E S I L A U Q E O H N I T U O L C O O P R E V I L R O F

The Latest Sport Headlines FORMULA 1 Hamilton unhurt in minor road accident BOXING Fury has brain the size of a squirrel's Klitschko RUGBY UNION White wants England head coach job CRICKET England heavily beaten in first ODI FOOTBALL Fifa's Blatter has 'small breakdown'

The Prem So Far...

>> Scott Dann heads late winner to seal victory for Palace

At Chelsea Critics Costa and myself, but you get used to it. "We're not doing well in the league at the moment. Last year we lost four games all season and this season we have lost seven already. But Jose Mourinho is a winner; when he loses he goes home sad as I do. "The results at Chelsea aren't what we would want and don't reflect the level of our play. Mourinho's Stamford Bridge future remains in the spotlight after Chelsea's worst start to a season for 37 years but Fabregas insists the manager has the "trust" of his players - and took another opportunity to dismiss recent newspaper claims he had led a dressing-room revolt against the boss. "Mourinho trusts us and we trust him," Fabregas added. Chelsea go into the international break 15 points adrift of league leaders Manchester City.

MIDDLING MERSEYSIDE: The Red and Blue corners of Liverpool are level on points in ninth and tenth places with Everton ahead on goal difference. Romelu Lukaku got his seventh of the season against West Ham last Saturday, the Belgian always Hammers Bilic’s boys! It was no laughing matter at Anfield on Sunday as Pardew’s Palace came to town and after Scott Dann’s 82nd minute winner, crowds of Liverpool supporters left. It was so noticeable that their highly unimpressed manager Jurgen Klopp said that he felt ‘the loneliest person in the stadium’. He pointed out there was ample time left to equalise and win, but they didn’t! Jurgen made a good point anyway - that’s not what you expect from loyal blood-red Liverpool fans, is it? SECOND HALF: The lower half of the Prem is surprisingly led by… Watford, who although losing to Leicester, have managed to sting a few critics with their performances since being promoted. Stoke – now there’s a team you don’t want to play when you need a win so badly it hurts, and your manager’s banned from the stadium. For the Potters, Bojan Krkic’s back, and with that unpredictable Austrian Arnautovic in your side anything could happen –

like scoring the winner against Chelsea’s chokers. The steadily-climbing Baggies were checked back 2 - 0 by Man U on Saturday when we all expected a goalless draw, but the Pulis preventative programme has settled the early flutters and WBA remain a team, like Stoke, that you don’t want to play when things aren’t going well… and things aren’t going well at Swansea. WIND CHANGES? Onewin-in-eight has seen the Swans slide down to 14th place, and now the awful ‘s’ word has been linked with manager Gary Monk. Neighbours Cardiff are trying again to do well, currently seventh in the Championship. How galling would that be for Swansea if the two clubs were to exchange leagues come May? Norwich pulled off a desperatelyneeded 1 – 0 win over those swatted Swans on Saturday to give the Canaries tweeting space, just four points above the Dreaded Drop Department SPECIALISTS IN FAILURE 2016: One place below Norwich in the Prem it’s you-know-who, and astoundingly you-knowwhere-in-the-league, sixteenth place. Yes, it’s champions Chelsea. Their latest loss at Stoke was typical of everything going wrong that can. Watching Jose’s hobos on the bench frantically trying to translate their

boss’s tableted instructions from the hotel was funny, but they still didn’t work. And now the merciless press are touting the names: Pep, Fabio, Carlos (again), Guus…and Brendan. WINNING UGLY: Newcastle were battered at brave Bournemouth , with just one tame scoring shot by the visitors as they held out for a win thanks to keeper Rob Elliot, in a result that actually got Newcastle out of the DDD – ironically at the expense of the Cherries who like Chelsea are another team for whom nothing is going right. The only good thing (for both) is – there’s time to put it right, and Bournemouth have less to lose. Second bottom is Sam’s Sunderland, savaged again this time by Southampton - and it’s going to be a long hard road until May. ON GARDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! D’Artagnan-style and against all the odds, Aston Villa’s new French manager Remi Garde made his point, with a goalless draw against mighty Man City. The Blues blew it but the Villains were vindicated with a good start for their manager. It’s going to be very interesting to see if the modestly-experienced Frenchman can work wonders with a famous club that’s rock bottom of the Prem – the only way is up, Remi!

ATHLETICS Farah set to skip World Indoors ATHLETICS Murray wants 1988 race investigated RUGBY UNION England in 'global' coach search FOOTBALL Chelsea Ladies lose to Wolfsburg in last-16 tie FORMULA 1 Stroll to test for Williams in 2016 RUGBY UNION Lewsey to step down as Welsh head of rugby FOOTBALL Sterling aims for 100 England caps ICE HOCKEY Steelers compensated over 1D concert CRICKET England 'must focus more on ODIs' FOOTBALL Japan legend Miura signs new deal aged 48 FOOTBALL Long ruled out of Irish first leg Supplied by BBC


HOLA INGLATERRA!

M E R P E TH

. . . R A F SO

BRING

! N O IT

e l b a d i m r o f n o e k a t England Spain! Going to see England play tonight? Roy’s boys are playing a friendly against Spain in Alicante at 8.45pm, and loads of ex-pats will be there to cheer on the Three Lions. The (Hercules CF) stadium is just off the Gran Via, so take the Madrid road as you enter Alicante, and it’s about two kms up on the right, you can see it from the dual carriageway. If you haven’t got a ticket, then ITV have live coverage tonight. England may have recorded a perfect record en route to Euro 2016, but it would be naive to suggest that Roy Hodgson's side are flawless. The calibre of opposition that the Three Lions faced in their group was questionable, at the very least, but they finally have a chance to test themselves against the continent's best tonight. The players flew into Alicante-Elche airport on Tuesday, and amidst great security, Wayne Rooney

LANCASTER GONER

Stuart Lancaster has resigned as England coach with immediate effect. Lancaster has stepped down following England's disappointing World Cup campaign. RFU chief executive Ian Ritchie did not rule out approaching a coach already under contract and said the cost of the "global search" was not important.

and the squad were ushered out using the old terminal building. Training has been taking place at La Nucia’s ground, with the Asian Garden at Finestrat used as the team’s hotel The last encounter between England and Spain finished 1-0 to England in 2011, won by a Lampard strike. However, England’s last victory in Spain was back in 1987. England will remain in Spain until tomorrow before they return to London for an equally tough test against Euro 2016 hosts France. Spain may have been dethroned in disappointing fashion in Brazil but they remain a force, even if their all-out tiki-taka style has had to be altered. The hosts are expected to field a somewhat experimental side, like England, as they attempt to settle on a formula that could help them become the first side to win next summer's tournament for the third time in a row.

With another international break upon us, here’s my take on the latest state of play in the Premier League:TABLE TOPPERS – Man City may have the money but they’re not running away with it, like drawing at Villa to stay joint top with… Arsenal, who blew the chance to go top soon after City’s Sunday blushes. Naturalamente, the party poopers were nasty neighbours Spurs who led at the Emirates by born-again Harry Kane’s excellent goal before Gibbs’ late equaliser ensured the North London bragging rights were even. Tottenham stay fifth – that’s respectable, five points behind the leaders. FOXY FRIENDS: Now then, this hurts a bit: a Forest supporter paying homage to a nasty neighbour (N.B.at least we beat Derby on Friday night, great win), but what can you say about that terrific Leicester side? The Foxes are in third place by rights, playing some great football with Player of the Month Jamie Vardy bangin ‘em in and breaking records every week. The little striker doesn’t run, he scampers like an excited kid on the park, and with Mahrez and the rest of the pride of Foxes all leaving the hounds behind, it’s well done to funnybut-effective Claudio Ranieri - who’s behind it all. Now the £64m question: can Leicester keep it up? (answers in May) COME FORTH! Now then (yawn) – who’s fourth? Oh yes, it’s the Red Devils of Manchester, grinding out the results in a very dis-United way. But old lofty Louis doesn’t seem to care, after all he did his job in stopping the rot and getting Man U back into Europe. West Ham’s new French star Dimitri Payet will now be out for three months, after the Hammers drew to Everton, but hey, sixth place is sixth place, and in the pirana-polluted Prem – that’s progress. Meanwhile Southampton are marching in to seventh place thanks to some good performances lately. Turn to page 47 as we talk Merseyside matters!

Two In For TORRY!

PUTIN ON DOPING

Russian President Vladimir Putin has ordered an investigation into claims the country's athletes have been part of a systematic doping programme. He said he wanted "professional co-operation" with anti-doping bodies. "The battle must be open," said Putin. "A sporting contest is only interesting when it is honest."

CD Torrevieja are looking to boost the poor goal tally this season, having re-signed striker Manu Amores who left the club for La Nucia last season, in addition to securing José Higón from UD Alzira.

THE COURIER No.1 for SPORT! All the action p 44-47


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