The Courier Week 113 by TKO UK

Edition 113

www.thecourier.es

Friday, April 19, 2013

THE SPANISH BOMBSHELL

THE SHAME GAME SPAIN has the secondhighest number of human-trafficking and sex-slavery cases in Europe, according to recent research. EU statistics firm Eurostat says that in 2010 – the most recent year for which official figures are known - a total of 1,605 women were smuggled into the country and held hostage, being forced to work as prostitutes against their will. And this does not include the ones who have not yet been found, or who escaped without the police finding out. In fact, there are more cases of forced prostitution among immigrants in Spain than in Romania, despite the fact that a high number

of human-trafficking victims come from the latter country, says Eurostat. Only Italy has a higher number of women forced into sex slavery – 2,381, more than double Romania's 1,154. Even in the Netherlands, where prostitution is legally regulated – or perhaps because of this – the victim count is lower, with 993 women trafficked in 2010. A total of 651 cases were detected in Germany in the same year. Eurostat also reveals that the number of human-trafficking cases

Cont’d on Page 2

A PRESSURE cooker allegedly used for bombs during Sunday’s Boston Marathon was made in Spain, according to US investigators. At a news conference on Wednesday, authorities said they had found destroyed

Fagor link to blast

parts of a Fagor-made pressure cooker along with a detonator and cables they believed were used to set off the explosive devices during the race, taking the lives of three people and injuring

close to 180. The evidence was sent to the FBI labs in Quantico, Virginia where experts hope to try to reconstruct the bomb and perhaps shed some light as to who was behind the ter-

Investigators comb through the site of one of the Boston blasts

rorist attack. Sara de la Hera, vice president of sales and marketing at Fagor, said that her company sells about 50,000 pressure cookers in the United States annually. The model in the FBI’s possession has a six-litre capacity. Agents will also see if they can determine where the appliance was purchased. The cooker’s top was discovered on the roof of a building near where the device was placed, authorities said. Pressure cookers have been used by terrorists to fabricate bombs in Afghanistan, Iraq, India and Nepal. According to a Spanish government terrorism report, these improvised artifacts have been used more than 200 plots and actual terrorist attacks in the United States from 2001 to 2011.

Our latest edition is always online at www.thecourier.es

Friday, April 19, 2013

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 965 99 66 66 E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Janine 616 332 178 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes Heidi Wardman John McGregor

Affiliations

Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

Photograph by 15-year-old JAMES DWYER, who is a pupil at el Limonar school, Villamartin

'not liable' for SHAME GAME AENA 2010 strike chaos

From Page 1

in Spain nearly quadrupled in a year – from 443 identified and released in 2009 to 1,605 in 2010. According to the International Work Organisation (OIT), as many as one in five human-trafficking victims are male. They detected a total of 880,000 people forced into slavery, sexual or otherwise, within the EU in 2010, of whom 68 per cent were women, 12 per cent underage girls, 17 per cent men and three per cent underage boys. A total of 75 per cent of traffickers are men, and 84 per cent of them trap their prey in order to exploit them sexually. Brussels has slammed the fact that in 'free and

democratic' countries such as the European Union member States, tens of thousands of humans are deprived of all liberty and forced into selling their bodies, and yet only six EU nations have implemented the Directive aimed to combat humantrafficking, approved in 2011. Provisions of the Directive include the

STATE airport chiefs AENA will not have to pay compensation to passengers affected by the massive strike in December 2010 which led to planes being grounded and chaos in terminals. The country's air-space was closed due to harshest possible penal- an air-traffic ties for offenders, total controller strike, forced support – before, during which and after trial – for victims, the then president, José Luis maintenance of statistics Rodríguez Zapatero, to on such crimes, and spe- declare an official 'state of emergency' to ensure the cial protection for those picketers went back on duty. who fall prey to traffickers This failed, meaning those to ensure they do not who continued to strike were come to any harm from guilty of a criminal offence. their captors or become States of emergency are targets for similar criminal declared where there is a risk of war-like activity or organisations.

other enemy hostility, or in the event of extreme and life-threatening natural disasters, and this was the first one ever called in the history of S p a i n ' s democracy. But the S u p r e m e Court has declared AENA, and therefore the Spanish state, is not liable for financial losses suffered during this time. The judge found that the air-traffic controllers' having 'abandoned their duties' was 'unforeseeable, serious, insurmountable, unavoidable in the short and medium-term and outside the normal planning of any public or private enterprise'.

Publication Published by Rainbow Media, S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A - 132 - 2011 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features. Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non-appearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re-publication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

Friday Sunny High 22° Low 13° Chance of rain 0% Monday Sunny High 18° Low 11° Chance of rain 0%

Tuesday Sunny High 19° Low 12° Chance of rain 0%

Saturday Sunny High 19° Low 9° Chance of rain 0% Wednesday Sunny High 20° Low 12° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Partly cloudy High 18° Low 11° Chance of rain 0% Thursday Sunny High 21° Low 13° Chance of rain 0%

Friday, April 19, 2013

BECKHAM’S MAGICIAN ‘PAL’ WAS A SERIAL PAEDOPHILE A COSTA-based British paedophile, who claimed to be friends with footballer David Beckham, has been jailed for six years. It comes after Ivan Russell’s fiancée Georgie Lamb, 44, exposed her partner’s 18 years of child abuse. The pair had moved to Malaga in 2005, where Russell, 42 (pictured) found work as a magician working up and down the Costa del Sol. According to his fiancée, life had been perfect until in June 2010 Lamb overheard him talking about sickening images of children he had stored on his laptop. It soon emerged that the children’s entertainer – who once met David and Victoria Beckham in a Costa del Sol restaurant– had been abusing children at holiday camps

Lamb, a writer, said: “I could not believe what I was hearing; it was one of the worst moments of my life. The children hero-worshipped Ivan because he pretended he knew the Beckhams and at one point he even tried to get me to pretend I was Victoria Beckham on the phone, but I refused.” He was convicted of 12 counts of indecent assault, one of indecency with a child and four of sexual assault. On conviction, the judge at Northampton Crown Court, described him as the ‘most selfish individual I have ever come across’. Police are still trying to speak to possible victims of Russell, who worked as a children’s entertainer at youth camps in the UK and various locations throughout the Malaga province.

Spain’s Boston consul sacked over bombing

SPAIN’S Foreign Affairs Ministry on Tuesday sacked its consul in Boston, Pablo Sánchez-Terán, for “failure to meet his over a period of 18 years. consular obligations.” He apparently used a photo of The decision was himself with the famous couple to made after the diploconvince youngsters he was Becks’ mat closed the personal magician. Spanish consulate office at the usual time on Monday, despite the bomb attacks at the city’s marathon having taken place just a few hours earlier. advised concerned viewers Diplomatic sources said to phone the hospitals in the decision was verbally Boston should they be communicated to the diplo- unable to locate their loved mat, who told Spanish chan- ones. The diplomat did, hownel Marca TV on Monday ever, answer calls from the night that the consulate had media, confirming that there “While it is true there is a lot been closed after the attacks were no reports at the time NEW legislation could of clandestine renting, we are because “it was the usual of Spaniards among the vicprevent Spanish home against this,” explains David time to do so.” owners from renting tims of the bombing. Tornos, president of Asotur, During that interview, The Foreign Affairs their properties to holian organisation that handles Sánchez-Terán did not give Minister, José Manuel daymakers. property rentals for tourists. out a telephone number for García-Margallo, said that If passed by the Senate, it “We pay all our taxes and families of Spaniards at the the consul's behaviour was will become illegal for private do things by the book, but the marathon to call, and instead "unacceptable." homes to be let to tourists on hotels think we are pirates. a short term basis. We just hope they don’t bring In a bid to help the strugthis law in and leave us gling hotel sector, the governalone.” ment has voted to update the Lawyer Antonio Flores, of Urban Rental Law (LAU) Lawbird, insists the new law which will hand regulation of could actually drive a lot more the rental area to the regional people into illegal renting. AMPA parent-teachers association has issued a denuncia authorities. He said: “Providing rentals against the education authority in Valencia for failing to keep Hotel owners argue that the practice competition. It is thought around over 20,000 are carried out legally there should not their promises over the dilapidated Principe de Espana of independently renting properties to be a problem. But if this law becomes school in Rojales. punters over the Internet is undermin- properties would be affected should the too restrictive it will drive more people The local community wants a new school to replace the ing the tourist trade and creating unfair law come into effect. into clandestine rentals.” crumbling building, which they regard as a potential death trap. And they are furious that Valencia has let them down after indicating a positive outcome to initial talks. A source at the school. whose new term began this week, told The Courier: “AMPA, the Headmaster, the Mayor and DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines? pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden Councillor for Education attended a meeting in Valencia with What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office the Secretary for Education on February 20 and were of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re assured that they would be contacted again within a month. celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page “Sadly, this has not come to fruition.’’ involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap- story.

HOLIDAY LETS SET TO BE OUTLAWED

Valencia denounced over school promises

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS!

Friday, April 19, 2013

Victory in Villena for Supermoto ace Mat SPAIN’S best Supermoto racers descended upon the Chicharra Kart racing circuit at Villena on Sunday for round two of the Spanish Supermoto championship. And it was Britain’s Mat Ford-Dunn from Bullas in Murcia who put on a superb display of riding in both of the SM Master 35 races to clinch the overall victory. With a large crowd watching the day’s racing Mat qualified his Supermotoland SML 450 race bike on the front row of the grid for the first of his two races. With a good start and a strong pace he was in a comfortable second position before a small crash in the dirt section allowed the 3rd placed rider to catch him. But once underway again, Mat opened a gap and held it to the line to take second. The Supermotoland race team briefed Mat on the grid for the second of his two races and he knew exactly who he had to beat to gain the overall win. Mat’s start was not so good this time and he was locked in a 4 rider battle for the lead throughout the

whole race and despite many overtaking attempts he was unable to pass the two riders in front without risking a crash, and finished a close third. But Mat knew that was enough for the overall victory and made sure that he didn’t make any mistakes that might cost him the win. Once the chequered flag dropped Mat was confirmed as the overall winner and took to the top step of the podium for the first time this

year. Mat’s sponsors, Advance Moves International removals and Stratton Motorsports, were delighted with the result and the many expat race fans that turned up to watch a great day’s racing. Mat is next in action at Oliva in Denia on May 5 for the second round of the Valencian championship. Further details, race reports and videos can be found at the team’s website www.supermotoland.com

Night of the Lion hearts The Torrevieja Costa Lions Club held their annual Charter Night Celebrations with an excellent dinner and dance at Restaurante Marjal Camping in Guardamar del Segura. The Lions of Torrevieja Costa, Torrevieja Suomi and Mazarron Bahia were honoured with diplomas presented by Ann Kristin Peltonen, Secretary General of the Fundacion Lions Clubs Espana, in recognition of their excellent work in driving the Lions for Lorca Appeal, which culminated recently with the opening of a purpose built educational facility for disabled children in Lorca. Torrevieja Costa Lions President Janette Bennett also received a Diploma de Reconocimiento fromLions District

Governor Miguel Angel Fernandez in recognition of service to Lionism and the community of Torrrevieja and surrounding areas during 2012 -13. In addition to the Club honours, Torrevieja Costa club secretary Iain Bennett was presented wirh The Melvin Jones Fellowship Award in recognition of dedication to humanitarian service to the highest degree. Iain joined Lions in 1982 in Stirling, Scotland and became a member of the Torrevieja Costa Lions in 2007 serving as Treasurer, Secretary and President in the ensuing years. The award was presented to Iain by Club Treasurer Peter Long. The celebrations went on until the early hours of Sunday with dancing to the excellent band PDQ.

CLARO president Bob Houliston hands in the completed questionnaires. (Photo courtesy of Información newspaper) OFFICIALS of Orihuela Costa’s CLARO faction say they have been ‘’amazed’’ by the response to their campaign to preserve the future of Cala Mosca. Nearly 1,000 completed questionnaires were officially collected and handed in to the Playa Flamenca office of the Town Hall last Friday.

And CLARO claimed in a press release that the response ‘’shows the strength of feeling in support of saving from excessive urbanisation and house building, as much as possible of this last green area, with the only remaining seaviews on the 16 kilometre long Orihuela Costa coast.’’

Friday, April 12, 2013

editor@thecourier.es

COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

The sad demise of El Raso NHW

EL Raso Neighbourhood Watch is donating its remaining funds to three charities folloing the decision to disband the group. A presentation will be held next Wednesday (April 24) in the El Raso Restaurant at 10.30am, with Age Concern, Samaritans and Adamar (a Spanish charity for disabled children and adults) each receiving 200 euros. As far as the demise of NHW El Raso is concerned, when the group was set up over six years ago by Ian Rose, they were lucky to get six or seven people attending. Later, my husband Ralph Roebuck became President and got together a very good committee of over seven and increased the coordinators to 22. We averaged over 30 people

at our meetings and raised lots of monies for charities, including Help the Heroes, The Butterfly Children and many more, both Spanish and English. We also put together, with the help of our committee, a very useful booklet which was passed out on El Raso. The large plaque as you enter El Raso, warning thieves that they are entering a NHW area, was placed there by NHW money raised through the hard work of the committee. Since Ralph died, there hasn’t been the same support and although Tony Bowhay (our Police Coordinator) and myself as Secretary have tried to keep it running we have beenfighting a losing battle. People do not seem to be interested any

more and there has been a type of deep apathy on El Raso towards the NHW. So at our last meeting on April 2, 2013 we decided to call it quits. Oh! Everyone said what a great job we are doing and they will be sorry to see it. But without more support there wasn’t any choice. Reading back what I have written, it looks as if I am bitter that the NHW had to end in this way and I suppose I am. Ralph would have been upset; he fought so hard to keep in going even when he was becoming increasingly ill. BABS ROEBUCK, El Raso

SPAIN BASHING SHAMES BRITS

Last week’s Courier

Support for vet is so touching HAVING just read your article re: the Benijofar vet arrest (Issue 112), I would like to compliment Sandra Piddock on her compassion and support for the family. Having known the whole family for six years - and having had them care for our animals over that period and become friends during that time - it's nice to hear a voice of reason amongst the rumours and hearsay, about the kindest, most compassionate and caring man it was our pleasure to know. Whatever the outcome, we will find it very difficult to believe that he was capable of this act. At the end of the day only he knows the truth. Our hearts and thoughts go out to the family and we will support them in any way possible. GLORIA BEAVIS

Colour is irrelevant - take it as red!

YOUR response to Mike Lewis (Issue 112) was spot on, Editor. I have followed Cardiff City since they got beaten (by double figures) by Moscow Dynamo, after the War. I am quite conservative in most ways, but ask me if I want the Bluebirds to play in red shirts against the best in the Premiership, or keep the blue shirts and play against Boston or Lowestoft (no disrespect meant to either), then it's

a no-brainer. The new guy at the helm has kept his promise, and the team and most fans responded. Well done to both - the few Luddites who say they would prefer to watch Merthyr Tydfil can either just do that (their places will be taken by willing supporters next year), or watch both teams when possible if the fixtures allow. CHARLES ISAAC, Cardiff/Torrevieja..

I FOUND Philip Humberstone’s bigoted com- own country. Don’t these people realise the damage it does to our overments (Issue 112) really offensive, in particular “I have found the best way to deal with the all reputation and how we are viewed here? By all means constructively criticise but to call on people to “insult the Spanish is to insult them”. And not just to us well-rounded and fair-minded expats (the majority) but to the Spanish people in general. Where does he think he is? Living in the the British Raj in India? Unfortunately there are a small minority of expats just like him who, despite being made welcome and offered a life he could only dream of in cold wind-swept UK, feels the need to bite the hand that feeds them. I think the clue to his arrogant attitude lies in the “I’m El Presidente” statement (where have we seen that before, folks?) I’ve been living in Spain and the Canaries for some 15 years. I’m from London but my grandmother was sent from Madrid to the UK to escape the horrors of the Civil War. There she met my grandfather and, well, here I am! So, taking that into account, you can see I have a good understanding of attitudes here in Spain. What I can tell you is that there is a growing resentment amongst some Spaniards to the “British arrogance and superiority complex” that some people seem intent on showing our hosts. Please don’t spout the “think of the thousands of pounds we bring them” line. That’s a bit like saying that if the UK had no immigrants the economy would collapse. It’s a tired lazy argument. What they do see is thousands of empty homes, bank repossessions, their own people losing their homes and families unable to feed themselves properly due to the Euro disaster. What they don’t want to hear is British people spouting off about how lazy, useless and poor they are at running their

Spaniards” is stepping over the line. I think The Courier is the best English language paper around. It is well put together with a good mix of entertainment, humour, news and advertising. Yes, there is the odd controversial article, especially by Tony Mayes but these are professionally written and designed to provoke conversation and comment (as well as being often tongue in cheek). This is good journalism. What we don’t need are “Little Englanders” like Mr Humberstone peddling these somewhat racist views via a Letters column. Can you imagine if it was an Asian man writing to an English paper calling on other Asians to insult English people? I don’t think Mr Humberstone needs me to explain what the reaction would be. If he finds it so bad here, why doesn’t he go back to driving his cab for a living in Brighton and see how things are there? Leave us decent-minded people to get on with the great life we have along with our Spanish friends. I realise the letter contents are not the views of The Courier and I’m not being oversensitive but we all have to live together. Many Spanish people read The Courier too - in fact my neighbour commented on this letter and I found myself having to make excuses for such ignorant views even though I didn’t want to. There is no excuse, but it taints us all and embarrasses us. The Courier is an example of what good things the Brits can bring to the party. Please print my response to redress the balance for those of us who don’t like to see such attitudes prevail (and from the Brits I know thats the majority). RICKY MARTIN LE-GRYS San Miguel De Salinas

EDITOR’S NOTE: LETTERS AND EMAILS WILL ONLY BE CONSIDERED FOR PUBLICATION IN THE COURIER IF AN ADDRESS AND CONTACT NUMBER ARE PROVIDED (NOT FOR PUBLICATION)

Friday, April 12, 2013

WHERE BLUEBIRDS FLY THE two monsters jammed either side of me really needed a couple of seats apiece. But this was one of those nights I didn’t mind being a sandwich. As long as Humpty and Dumpty weren’t hungry, that was. I was just happy to be at Cardiff City Stadium on Tuesday to see history made and my most precious sporting dream become a reality. I was one of the few City fans who didn’t invade the pitch at the final whistle to celebrate the team’s promotion to the Premier League. You can thank my two minders for that - it was impossible to SEE past them, let alone negotiate my way around them physically. In the end I settled for watching the pitch party on the club’s closed-circuit TV system. What on earth was she doing at the match in the first place, I hear some of you asking. Well, let’s say it was the fulfillment of a child’s dream. I pity folk who have no interest in sport because nothing can match the sheer passion and unashamed bias of the true football supporter. To players and fans alike, pure joy and abject despair run side by side, as any fan will tell you. And nowhere are the two extremes more vividly evident than in the

Forgive me, I’m somewhere over the rainbow A winner at last: Former Labour leader Neil Kinnock in party mood on promotion night

English Premier League arguably the finest club competition in the world and certainly the richest. There are kids in London and Dublin - and Cardiff too who attach themselves to the Manchester United bandwagon of success to win bragging rights over school pals who support the likes of Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool. To me these people are not genuine fans. The REAL supporters are those who attach their colours to the mast of their local sinking ship and spend a lifetime trying to stay afloat. For most, there will be no happy ending but every so often a long-forgotten wreck of a club will be rescued and

refurbished by an affluent, ambitious admiral – and a miracle will happen. Like the one that led to those two big oafs putting the squeeze on me on Tuesday evening. Not that I was worried because, as 26,000 baying Taff voices echoed around me, ‘’WE-AREGOING-UP, WE ARE GOING UP!’’ It’s well over half a century since I picked up my dad’s newspaper at our suburban home in the Welsh capital and read that the local football team had been relegated to the second division. One of the Cardiff players lived opposite us and as his son was one of my playmates, that day I became a Bluebird, a Cardiff City fan.

RYANAIR’S FAB FREEBIE! RYANAIR may be the favourite target for everyone’s rotten tomatoes, but they do at least respond to my queries. Even if it’s not always promptly. I followed up my article last week about their money-spinning practices with an email requesting clarification of their rules. This is the response I got from their press office (my questions in bold, their answers in italic). 1. Are the people who check passengers through to the plane Ryanair employees? If not, who are their employers and are they paid commission? Ryanair employs a third party to carry out the check-in duties at Alicante Airport. However, the suggestion they are paid a 'commission' is absurd. 2. Why are women not allowed to carry their handbags onto the plane, but permitted to take them out of their hand luggage as soon as they have boarded? Is this not just a means of obtaining extra income without having to put fares up? Passengers are entitled to a generous 10kg cabin bag allowance and must ensure all of their carry-on items are placed in their cabin bag. Ryanair continues to offers pas-

senger the lowest fares as well as a FREE 10kg cabin bag allowance. 3. Finally, why does a pensioner whose hand luggage fits in the Ryanair rack get ‘fined’ 50 euros (a totally disproportionate amount) just because her handbag makes it marginally wider than the container? Since her actual luggage was within your rules, surely there should have been some discretion shown? Hand luggage must fit inside the Ryanair bag sizer. Ryanair passengers are informed of the cabin bag dimensions and weight restrictions at the time of booking and through reminder emails prior to their flight. All passengers agree to the terms and conditions of travel at the time of booking, with the vast majority adhering to these terms and conditions. Note the blatant attempt to turn my questions into a promotion of Ryanair’s wonderful service. The 10k hand luggage allowance is a special concession, a freebie that we should be eternally grateful for. So how come Monarch and Jet2.com offer the same 10k, don’t enforce the handbag rule - and don’t employ rude jobsworths?

It was a decision that condemned me to supporting the Bluebirdsthrough thin and thinner - and at its thinnest, almost seeing the club go into liquidation. There was the odd high, of course, but apart from two seasons in the early 1960s,

the Bluebirds flitted around the lower echelons of the 92club Football League for most of my lifetime. And at their lowest point in the ‘90s, they came perilously close to going out of the league altogether. Meanwhile, football moved into a new world of megabusiness with the launch of the Premiership in the early 90s. The rich got richer, the poor got poorer…and the idea of Cardiff City’s paupers ever becoming a force in the game all but vanished. Then, around the turn of the century, everything changed. Suddenly, there was talk of a new stadium to replace the crumbling Ninian Park. Promotion from the third tier to the second followed in 2003. In 2008, we reached the FA Cup Final… and moved into a new pur-

pose-built stadium. Four seasons of play-off despair followed until, bankrolled by eccentric Malaysian billionaire Vincent Tan, the Premiership dream finally came true on Tuesday. My only problem was those colours I tied to the mast over 50 years ago. Because last summer Mr Tan unilaterally altered a century of history by turning the Bluebirds into red birds. Red, is seems, is regarded as a lucky colour in the Far East, while blue is seen as a loser’s hue. And on the strength of the months since the red revoloution, it’s hard to argue with Tan logic. In any case, who ever heard of painting the town blue? Oh, I forgot. See you at Letsby Avenue next season, Delia!

Friday, April 19, 2013

I reached into my coat pocket to pay for my groceries and pulled out my grandson's Doctor Who sonic screwdriver. Why can't kids look after their own stuff? I was so embarrassed. I wanted the supermarket floor to open up when the checkout lady asked if I'd already paid for the plastic toy. 'Er, the sonic screwdriver is not from this establishment. It belongs to my grandson. He's a Doctor Who fan,' I mumbled, my face turning as crimson as the planet Akhaten during the Festival of Offerings. 'Hang on a minute,' said the bloke standing behind me in the checkout queue. 'I've just come back from Spain and I read in The Courier that your grandson is a fan of Thomas the Tank Engine. So not only are you lying but your column isn't even funny anyway.'

Friday, April 19, 2013

TOY TROUBLE

'That's my OTHER grandson,' I pointed out. 'But I don't see either child -- just one shifty adult,' someone else in the queue commented, suspiciously eyeing the sonic screwdriver I was still clutching in my sweaty palm. 'My three grandchildren are all at school,' I whined. 'I just happen to be a dumping ground for their toys. My overcoat's other pocket no doubt contains my granddaughter's fairy princess magic wand.' 'And would you have a sales receipt for that?' asked the checkout lady accusingly. 'Just what the hell are you talking about?' demanded

Mrs S when I got home. 'Planet Akhaten? Festival of Offerings? I only sent you out for a loaf and a packet of spready cheese.' 'Those were references to a recent Doctor Who episode. And, by the way,' I added, scratching my head, 'I forgot the spready cheese.' 'That's unforgivable!' snapped Mrs S, wearing her unforgiving look. 'I ask you to get two things and you forget one of them. Just what is the matter with you these days?'

'I think I've hit the male menopause,' I retorted. Mrs S stared at me. 'Rubbish! You're much too old for that.' 'You don't understand!' I cried, stabbing at the air with my grandson's

sonic screwdriver to emphasise my angst. 'I don't know who I am nowadays. I am seriously considering leaving this house and embarking on a journey to find myself.' 'You'll probably find that you're in the pub,' said Mrs S

dryly. 'And by the way where is my surprise gift?' 'Huh?' I responded, stopping the sonic screwdriver in mid-swoop. 'What are you talking about?' Mrs S sighed. 'Every time you go to the supermarket you bring me back a surprise gift. So what have you brought me this time?' I searched through my new bag for life (I'd lost the last one) but all I could find was the loaf of bread I'd just purchased. 'Ah!' I exclaimed. 'I remember now. I bought you an Aero choccy bar but . . .' 'Don't tell me,' sighed Mrs S. 'You took it back because it had little holes in it.' 'No. I was hungry so I ate it on the way home.' 'It would have been more nutritious to munch on a slice

of the bread you'd just bought,' suggested Mrs S. 'I thought of that,' I said. 'But I hadn't purchased anything to spread on it.' Mrs S slapped a look of self-satisfied triumph across her features. 'Gotcha!' she cried. 'I've just caught you out telling porky pies. 'You promised you'd start a diet to combat your slob-like appearance and here you are admitting that you've consumed a chocolate bar and that you nearly ate a slice of bread. You may be a man but you act like a naughty boy.' I was just about to flee to the pub for a . . . er . . . slimline tonic when there was a hammering on the front door. My grandson was on the step, his face a mask of junior disappointment. 'Grandpa,' he said. 'Why did you take my sonic screwdriver? You're a very naughty man.'

Friday, April 19, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH LESSON 67

busque, busquemos, busquéis, busquen For verbs that end in -gar, the g changes to gu when it comes before the letter e: pagar – pague, pagues, pague, paguemos, paguéis, paguen For verbs that end in uir, add the letter y before the letter a: huir – huya, huyas, huya, huyamos, huyáis, huyan

Whenever there is an element of doubt or uncertainty, with feelings such as hope or desire, and with negative statements of positive verbs that do not use the subjunctive, for example, I am sure you are going would not use the subjunctive, but I am not sure that you are going is in the subjunctive, because there is the element of doubt whether you are going or not.

not follow any of the patterns that we have learnt in the

Here is a list of common expressions which have an element of doubt and so will always be used with the subjunctive: preferir que – to prefer that, querer que... to want, a menos que....unless, antes (de) que.... before, con tal (de) que.... provided that, en caso de que... in case, para que.... so that, sin que..... without There are of course also expressions that do not use the subjunctive, such as: es cierto que... it´s certain that, es claro que.... it´s clear that, es verdad que...it´s true that

I HEAR and read so much about the Spanish not wanting foreigners in their country but that they are happy enough to have our money. However, we foreigners do ourselves no favours when we don´t even try to learn the Now we will learn the six verbs that are irregular, they do language. There is no good excuse for not being able to learn, the only reason for not being able to learn Spanish is laziness, and I am so glad that you are all trying to learn and put paid to at least a few people’s conceptions of the British. I hope you have noticed that Spanish is spoken how it is written, and you may have wondered why this is and which came first, the written word or the spoken. Well, apparently Spanish was first spoken and then an alphabet was created around it, which is why we can pronounce any word we see almost perfectly as long as we learn a few simple rules. One of these is that verbs can change their spelling in order to sound the same when they are conjugated. These verbs when used in the subjunctive are changed thus: For verbs that end in -zar, the z changes to c when it comes before the letter e: empezar – empiece, empieces, empiece, empecemos, empecéis, empiecen For verbs that end in -ger or -gir, the g changes to j when it comes before the letter a: escoger – escoja, escojas, escoja, escojamos, escojáis, escojan elegir – elija, elijas, elija, elijamos, elijáis, elijan For verbs that end in -guir, the gu changes to g when it comes before the letter a: seguir – siga, sigas, siga, sigamos, sigáis, sigan For verbs that end in -car, the c changes to qu when it comes before the letter e: buscar – busque, busques,

past, so they need to be learnt off by heart one by one: dar - dé, des, dé, demos, deis, den estar – esté, estés, esté, estemos, estéis, estén haber – haya, hayas, haya, hayamos, hayáis, hayan ir – vaya, vayas, vaya, vayamos, vayáis, vayan saber – sepa, sepas, sepa, sepamos, sepáis, sepan ser – sea, seas, sea, seamos, seáis, sean Let´s remind ourselves when the subjunctive is used.

So now let´s try and check our knowledge of the subjunctive with some translations, some will be in the subjunctive and some will not, just to keep you on your toes! Translate the following into Spanish: I believe that they are in the house, I want the boy to eat more, It´s certain that she´s coming, It´s probable that they will return soon, I hope you have had a good day ,I recommend that you read the book, It´s necessary that she buys groceries (comestibles), The man is certain that the woman cooks every day, It is advisable (es aconsejable) that you exercise every day, We hope that you come to the party. I will be back next week with the answers, ¡que tengas una buena semana!

Friday, April 19, 2013

BACK TO SPAIN WITH AN EYE FOR LOVE LIFE has taken a pleasant change of direction for my wife, my dogs, cats and me over the past four weeks. In that time we have been back in Espana to live permanently and although there was much planning and waiting to contend with before the move, it has been worth the long drawn out wait. Many people back in the UK thought we had lost our mind as we sold our house in London and set about our big adventure. In my opinion, Spanish people are the friendliest of all the nations I have visited throughout the world and living in a mostly Spanish town and becoming part of the community has been one of the most rewarding things I have ever experienced. Many a Spanish smile has made us feel a very warm welcome and I wonder if they know of their special gift of making strangers feel at home. Their calm and loving nature is also I find, extended to their dogs. Even the ones who are supposed to be guarding homes will bark, but that bark is followed by a little twinkle in the eye, as if to say, “I don’t really mean it”! Is it the sun that mellows these beautiful dogs? Who knows, but it is lovely to see. Only a few days ago, Jean and I passed a house where the two dogs were supposed to be guarding. They ran up to the fence to greet us, tails wagging in the hot sun. Their friendly look was as if to say, “Don’t tell our owners we didn’t bark, we wouldn’t hurt a fly, we just love the attention your

giving us. When will you be back”! Yes, we are enjoying life in this country and although the opportunities are greater to earn pennies in London, priorities have changed for me as I hit middle age and as long as we have a roof over our heads and food on the table, my wants do not go further. Only a few evenings ago, my seven dogs and I went on a walk through the Spanish countryside, followed by Gizmo our Spanish cat! After walking for some time I found a rock to sit on. I watched as my dogs and cat looked on in amazement at the floating butterflies. Behind them God had his set of paints out as he coloured the sky a deep pink. At that moment I felt the need to pinch myself, but then realised that this was no dream. It was a millions miles away from the traffic, the congested streets, the rain and the yob culture that scars London. I thought of all the people back in London, who thought us mad for following our dream, but maybe after all it is not us Billy and Gizmo enjoy a walk in the Spanish countryside. who are mad. I looked down at Fergie Rodriguez, our latest rescue dog thing we have ever known in London was for this one prewho only a few days earlier was in a killing station in cious life looking back at me it was well worth it. Thankfully Fergie will be one of many we will save as we Cordoba. He looked back at me with his one eye that works. His look was one of love and appreciation. If leaving every- enjoy our new life.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Blanca is about 9 years old and she was rescued after a long time being out in the cold. She needs somewhere to call home, she has anaemia and needs a daily tablet. Please call 650 304 746. www.pepaspain.com

Wills is 1 of 3 puppies brought to us after being found wandering the streets. 1 has been adopted and 2 are still available. They are now approx 11 weeks old and will be medium size when fully grown. Call: 966 725 975

Rita was born in August 2012 she’s a medium sized retriever X. She’s a loving and affectionate girl who loves to be close to you. She is very well behaved and is just waiting for her forever home. Please call P.E.P.A. on 650 304 746.

LACOSTE, CHANEL & DOLCE are Sharpei crossbreeds and now 12 weeks old. They are all fully vaccinated and micro chipped. Please call the kennels on 966 710 047

Simba is a handsome part Siamese neutered male with lovely blue eyes. To meet Simba please contact Joe on 966719272 or speak with Rose in the shop.

Rocky is a German Shepherd that has been tied up for most of his life, He is 10 years old and is now ready to find that special person that will care for him for the rest of his life. Please ring Laurence 680856235

Lacoste

Blanca These 4 pups were found abandoned in the campo with their mother when they were just 2 weeks old, they are now looking for homes and will be small/medium size when fully grown. Call: 645 469 253

Maisie is a black Lab cross about 2 years old. She is very affectionate and is fine with other dogs and is not interested in cats. please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20

Wills

Rita

Dolce

Simba

Rocky

Friday, April 19, 2013

DO YOU NEED MONEY?

LÍNEA DIRECTA IS GIVING AWAY UP TO €300 IN CASH Línea Directa Aseguradora is the insurer of choice for foreign residents in Spain. Since 1998, it has offered all its services in both English and German, including the purchase of the policy, handling claims, forwarding documents and 24-hour road assistance. It has now taken another step in its commitment to its foreign policyholders with a remarkable offer: Línea Directa is giving its customers up to €300 when they recommend the company’s excellent car and home insurance to their friends and family. How does it work? It’s very easy. For each person purchasing car or home insurance, that has been recommended by a Línea Directa customer, the company will give €30 to both the current policyholder and the new customer. To qualify for this offer, the new customer must call the company with the name and ID number (NIE or passport) of the person who recommended Línea Directa and, if the policy is finally signed, both parties will receive the money in 45 days. The offer is limited to a maximum of 10 people per customer, which could result in a profit of up to 300 euros, a considerable amount in the current economic crisis. The offer, the only one of its kind in the insurance sector, will be valid until June 30 2013. About Línea Directa Aseguradora Línea Directa Asegurador is the fifth largest motor insurer in Spain, and specialises in the sale of direct car, motorbike, company fleet and home insurance. It currently has over 2 million customers and almost 2,000 employees providing a service to the whole of Spain in Spanish, English and German.

Call now: 902 123 104

Friday, April 19, 2013

NEVER TOO OLD TO PLAY IS anyone ever too old to have fun? That question struck me in a rather strange way while I was watching my son play in Chasers, our local indoor play area. I was with a friend who had two daughters, aged 10 and 13, and at first they were quite shy in all respects. It was the first time I had met them and they hid behind my friend for a while before gaining more and more confidence. As we sat and talked my son played happily on the slides, climbing up the obstacles and back down again. Meanwhile the girls got more and more bored. Finally the owner, Dave, managed to get them to enter the area and they ended up having great fun without worry about their age or who was watching. My friend and I even went in with them at one point for a ride down the slide! As I sat back down I wondered how many of us forget to humour our inner child; for sure we all have one and as we age it remains, more and more hidden from view. With aging we grow wiser but also more aware of our surroundings, aware of who might be watching what we do - and self-consciousness takes over our lives. But should we let it? Does it matter if occasionally we take a ride down a slide or sit on a swing? As long as they don´t break and no one gets hurt, where´s the harm? I sometimes feel when I´m at the park playing with my little fella that there are people watching me and I am aware that many people either take no notice or smile with the knowledge that a loving mother is playing with her son. However I am also aware of some people whose eyes tell me they are

There are many ways to have fun and we adults should incorporate at least a little play time into each day. We are lucky in Spain to have the beach and mountains, parks and of course fiestas, dancing is one way to have fun, let out your inner child and go back to your youth. Those days of nightclubs might be over but the culture in Spain is very much about fun and keeping yourself young at heart. There are many ways to find out where the most local fiestas are each week and who cares if you go to one, five or more? You are your own boss in this life and if you grow up too much that you forget to have fun, how much are you going to enjoy this life? Hopefully we all have many years ahead of us, kicking back and remembering how being young feels can only be a great thing. The weather is getting warmer and so outdoor activities are becoming easier to organise. A picnic with time to relax to me counts as enjoying yourself, you could incorporate a walk or even make a little treasure thinking quite the opposite. That I, as a grown woman, should act as such and shouldn´t be engaging in such triviality. I hunt, especially fun if you go with friends. The most important thing is that we always remember, no have had to deal with many neighbours looking down at me matter the number of years we have been on this planet since I came to Spain, so I am well used to this sort of treatthere is still time to kick back and be young, Dance like ment, and I am the type of person to say so what if I want to nobody's watching; love like you've never been hurt. Sing like have fun with my child, what has it got to do with you? nobody's listening; live like it's heaven on earth, so quoted However, as my son grows and will need me less and less, Mark Twain and it has never been more true in these dark, where does that leave me? Do I suddenly have to grow up as difficult times. well? Do I have to stop playing? We all need to consider the little voice in our head that I don´t believe people without children or those whose kids says, life isn´t so bad, it could be a lot worse, let´s just go and have grown up should have to miss out on having play time have some fun, if only for a few hours. as well. There just has to be a different way to play. Someone I´ll leave you with another quote, this one by the great without children would appear a bit strange at a children’s George Bernard Shaw: ´We don´t stop playing because we play park, however play isn´t restricted to swings and slides. grow old, we grow old because we stop playing´.

Friday, April 19, 2013

DING-DONGERS AT OZ WITH REALITY I LET out a little cheer when the insensitive attempt to elevate a Wizard of Oz download track to UK No.1 failed on Sunday. It was done in the worst possible taste as an insult to the late Baroness Thatcher, and the chances were pretty high that those who wasted their money on it, were wearing nappies when she grabbed Britain from the edge of collapse and made it respected around the world. Thatcher stalwart Cecil Parkinson said with a smile that she would have been far more interested in catching up with Songs of Praise on TV rather than being particularly offended by the stupidity of it all. But here is the paradox that the campaigners and

downloaders seem to have forgotten, or chosen to simply ignore. Margaret Thatcher stood passionately for freedom of speech and the right to express an opinion, no matter how unpopular. In the old East European Communist states, she vigorously backed those who wanted free speech, who were often put behind bars and beaten up. It was for the rights of people to publicly utter their beliefs that Mrs.Thatcher left a great legacy - a fact that all these new converts to 50 seconds of The Wizard of Oz have taken for granted, and in a

perverse way, they have paid her a great tribute! As an aside, I also found it irritating that some people chose to bash the BBC for not playing the track, whilst ignoring the fact that all the UK commercial radio broadcasters had taken the same decision on the same grounds of bad taste. I sincerely hope that the downloaders will now move onto other gems from the same movie like Follow The Yellow Brick Road and Over The Rainbow! There’s nothing worse than former party

grandees giving you advice on how to run your party. John Major would certainly bear witness to the many criticisms he got from the Iron Lady when he was Prime Minister, and now there are rumblings from a couple of ex-Labour Home Secretaries telling Ed Miliband what to do. The thing is, they are talking sense! David Blunkett has said that Labour should offer a one-nation party (which sounds like code for carrying on as New Labour) that is not based on grievance. Then John Reid appeared out of nowhere to say it should be a party of government, and not one of opposition, and they need to come up with solutions to problems, rather than just criticising the coalition gov-

ernment. They are right and Miliband needs to start enthusing people with positive reasons for voting Labour in two years time, rather than waiting for a likely Cameron defeat. That’ll be the difference between being the largest party in the House of Commons and having a healthy overall majority that will really allow him to do things, assuming we know what they are in the first place. One result Ed Miliband would not have been surprised at would have been the re-election of Len McCluskey as leader of the UK’s biggest trade union, Unite. This left-wing relic said he called an election two years early so as not to clash with the 2015

Parliamentary vote. That was nice of him, but I suppose that allows him plenty of time, as Labour’s biggest financial donor, to carry on criticising and threatening Miliband over his policy of public sector pay restraint. Red Len, I’m sure, is wanting payback over his block vote for the younger Miliband back in 2010, but credit to Ed for standing his ground, though he has no political choice in case he appears to be a union puppet! So whilst McCluskey continues to live with the fairies, I just leave you with the thought that you get what you deserve. That’s appropriate for the membership of Unite, where 85 per cent of them just couldn’t be bothered to vote. I wish them well.

Friday, April 19, 2013

ST GEORGES GRUB MINI PORK PIES WITH PICCALLI Ingredients few dots of butter 600g shortcrust pastry , bought or homemade little flour , for dusting 85g dried white breadcrumbs 400g good C u m b e r l a n d sausages (about 6) 200g smoked bacon lardons Âź tsp each ground mace, ground pepper and dried sage 1 egg , beaten with a fork few pinches sesame seeds piccalilli , homemade or bought, to serve

Method

1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Line each hole of a 12hole muffin tin with a thin strip of baking parchment across the middle that's long enough so the ends stick out a centimetre or two - use a dab of butter to stick in place. Roll out two thirds of the pastry on a lightly floured surface and stamp out 12 x 10cm circles (you may need to re-roll trimmings). Press a circle into each hole to line. 2. Sprinkle 1 tsp of breadcrumbs into the base of each pie. Tip the rest of the crumbs into a mixing bowl. Squeeze in the sausage meat, discarding the skins, along with the bacon, mace, pepper, sage and just a little salt. Get your hands in

and mash and squish everything together until the breadcrumbs have just about disappeared. Divide mixture between the holes, packing in firmly and shaping to a dome in the middle. 3. Roll out the remaining pastry and stamp out 12 x 7cm circles. Brush with a little egg and add a top to each pie, eggside down to stick, carefully pressing pastry edges together to seal. Brush with more egg (don't throw away leftovers) and sprinkle with sesame seeds. Bake for 30 mins until golden then carefully remove the pies from the tin, using the parchment ends to help you lift them out. Sit on a parchment lined baking tray, brush all round the sides with more egg and put back in the oven for 8 mins. Cool completely then eat with piccalilli, or your favourite pickle.

HERBY TOAD IN THE HOLE Ingredients 140g plain flour 3 eggs 300ml milk 2 tsp Dijon mustard 2 tbsp vegetable oil 8 Cumberland sausages 8 sage leaves 4 rosemary sprigs

Method 1. Heat oven to 240C/220C fan/gas 9. In a food processor, combine the flour, eggs, milk, mustard and some salt and pepper, blitz until

smooth, then leave to rest for 30 mins. 2. Pour the oil into a metal roasting tin about 30 x 23cm and 7.5cm deep. Brush the oil all over the sides and bottom, then place in the oven. When the roasting tin is very hot and smoking, place the sausages inside, evenly spread out, and cook for 5 mins. 3. Give the rested batter a stir and pour into the really hot tin - take care as it may spit. Quickly sprinkle over the sage leaves and rosemary, then place in the middle of the oven. Do not open the door for 25 mins, then check - if needed, cook for a further 5-10 mins. Cook until puffed up and brown and the batter is completely cooked through. Serve straight from the dish.

SCAMPI WITH TARTARE SAUCE Ingredients 15-20 langoustine or Dublin Bay prawn tails vegetable or sunflower oil , for frying 140g plain flour 85g cornflour 150ml beer 100ml sparkling water lemon wedges and chips , to serve FOR THE TARTARE SAUCE 6 tbsp mayonnaise 1 gherkin or 6 cornichons, finely chopped

Friday, April 19, 2013

1 1 1 2

tbsp capers , rinsed and chopped tsp lemon juice tbsp chopped parsley tsp chopped tarragon

Method

1.To prepare the langoustines, pull off the head and pincers. Lay the tail flat on a chopping board and use a sharp pair of scissors to cut a line straight down the back of the shell. Carefully peel the langoustine, score down the back, then remove the grit sac. 2. Get the oil heating in a large saucepan or wok - you will need enough to come 2-3in up the side of the pan. For the tartare sauce, mix all ingredients in a bowl and season. 3. Place the flours in a bowl with a good pinch of salt and pepper. Add the beer and sparkling water, and whisk to a smooth batter. 4. To test if the oil is hot enough, put a drop of batter into the pan - it should crisp and brown within 30 secs. Dip each langoustine or prawn tail into the batter, then carefully drop it into the oil. Drizzle a little extra batter over each one while they are cooking - this will give you a really crispy coating. Cook them in batches, making sure you don't overcrowd the pan. When golden and floating to the surface, scoop out and drain well on kitchen paper. Sprinkle the scampi with salt and serve with the tartare sauce, lemon wedges and chips.

VICTORIA SPONGE Ingredients 200g unsalted butter , softened, plus extra for greasing 200g caster sugar 1 tsp vanilla extract 4 medium eggs 200g self-raising flour , plus extra for dusting about 6 tbsp raspberry jam 250ml double cream , whipped icing sugar , for dusting

Method

1. Heat oven to 190C/170C fan/gas 5. Grease and flour 2 x 20cm sandwich tins. Place the butter, sugar and vanilla extract into a bowl and beat well to a creamy consistency. Slowly beat in the eggs, one by one, then fold in the flour and mix well. 2. Divide the mix between the cake tins, place into the oven

and bake for about 20 mins until risen and golden brown. The cakes should spring back when gently pushed in the middle. When ready, remove from the oven and allow to cool for 5 mins in the tin, before turning out onto a wire rack and cooling completely. 3. Spread the jam onto one cake and top with the cream. Sandwich the cakes together and dust with icing sugar.

EASY TREACLE SPONGE Ingredients 250g golden syrup zest 1 lemon , plus juice ½ lemon 5 tbsp breadcrumbs 200g pack butter , softened 200g golden caster sugar 3 medium eggs 200g self-raising flour 5 tbsp milk

Method

1. Heat oven to 180C/160C fan/gas 4. Mix the syrup, lemon zest, juice and breadcrumbs and spread over the base of a 1.5 litre baking dish. 2. Beat the butter and sugar until pale and fluffy, then beat in the eggs, one by one. Stir in the flour and milk and dollop over the syrup. Bake for 35-40 mins until golden and risen, and a skewer poked into the sponge comes out clean-ish. Eat with lots of custard, cream or ice cream and extra dribbles of syrup.

PEAR & BLACKBERRY CRUMBLES Ingredients 700g (or 4 large) ripe English pears , peeled and cubed 100g golden granulated sugar 250g blackberries 200g plain flour 100g unsalted butter , cold, cut into small pieces 85g shelled pistachios , roughly chopped 100g demerara sugar ice cream , to serve (optional)

Method

1. Heat oven to 190C/fan 170C/gas 5. Place the pears in a medium-size pan, add the granulated sugar and cook on a medium heat until the fruit starts to soften and releases its juices, about 10 mins. Add the blackberries and bring back to the boil, then remove from the heat. Spoon the fruity mixture into 4 individual ovenproof ramekins, or 1 large baking dish. 2. Place the flour, butter and a pinch of salt in a large bowl and rub together with your fingers until the mixture resembles

coarse breadcrumbs. Add the pistachios and demerara sugar, then stir to combine. 3. Sprinkle crumble evenly over the cooked fruit. This can be done up to 1 day ahead, or frozen for up to 1 month. Bake for 20-25 mins if small, 40 mins if large, until golden. If baking from frozen, add 15 mins cooking time. Remove from the oven, cool slightly, then serve with ice cream, if you like.

SUGARED SCONES Ingredients 85g diced butter 350g self-raising flour ¼ tsp salt 1½ tsp bicarbonate of soda 4 tbsp caster sugar 200ml milk , warmed to room temperature, plus a splash extra crushed sugar cubes , to decorate

Method 1. Heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. Whizz butter into flour. Tip into a bowl and stir in salt with bicarbonate of soda and sugar. Using a cutlery knife, quickly stir in milk - don't overmix. 2. Tip out onto a lightly floured surface and turn over a couple of times to very gently bring together with your hands. Gently pat to about 1in thick, then stamp out rounds with a floured cutter. Pat together trimmings to stamp out more. Brush the tops with a splash more milk, then scatter with crushed sugar cubes. Bake on a baking sheet for 10-12 mins until risen and golden. touch. Rest for a min or two before unwrapping, slicing and serving. Vanilla custard is the perfect accompaniment and the roly-poly is best eaten as soon as it is made.

Friday, April 19, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Alan wanted to know how to change the audio ADVICE: Mary was having problems with QLB crashing. settings for Skype Hi Richard, someHi Richard, I have downloaded Skype but when I video call I have visual but no audio unless I use headphones how do I get audio without the headphones. Regards, Allen

Hi Alan, the audio controls for Skype are configured within its settings, in order to change which port is used to deliver sound you need to click on Tools and then Options from within Skype, and then choose Audio Settings. From there you can select the speaker to use by clicking on the drop down box next to speakers and choosing the appropriate one for your external speakers. You can test your selection by clicking on the little green play button to the right of your selection. Also, do remember that some computers automatically mute the speakers when you plug in headphones, so you may also find that the solution is to simply remove the headphones worth trying in the first instance.

times when I open up the Windows Live Mail a message box appears with the words … “QLB Controller has stopped working. Windows is checking for a solution”. Perhaps you could explain what this means? Hi Mary, this is actually not caused by Windows Live Mail, but is related to the special keys on your laptop called HotKeys, it looks like the software needs to be updated, you can do that easily enough by following the link http://tinyurl.com/qlberror and downloading the updated software and installing it.

BEWARE OF THE SCAMMERS! Below is an example sent to me by a customer. They come from various locations around the world. Be warned; do not send these people your details and especially no money.

ADVICE: Mark was having problems burning DVD’s in Windows 7

: Hello, I have been trying to copy files to DVD but I keep getting the following error message "This DVD -ROM is read only. You can copy files to this writable DVD but you must insert it into a writable drive”. I had this message for the first time yesterday and have never had many problems with copying files to disc until now. I have tried uninstalling and re installing the drive, shutting the computer off and turning on again and tried several different restore points as well as two Microsoft diagnose and repair downloads but nothing will get the drive to work correctly. I seem to have only two options left A) carry out a complete clean reinstall of Windows that as you know can take forever or B) Buy a new DVD drive although i am a bit reluctant to have this expense if it turns out i do not need a new drive. A long time searching the net has come up with no solutions even though it appears that others have had exactly the same problem. Any ideas or solutions to the problem? Any thoughts or ideas you may have will be appreciated. Thank you Mark

Hi Mark, there could be a number of reasons why you are having problems, probably the best place to start is with the Windows 7 guide for burning a CD or DVD, here is a link… http://windows.microsoft.com/en-us/windows7/burn-a-cd-or-dvd-in-windows-explorer

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternately why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page. office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Friday, April 19, 2013

Arm Lift (Dermolipectomy) Mineral Water Keeps Teeth Healthy

Would I Be a Suitable Candidate?

How Long Will the Results Last?

This operation is appropriate for anyone who has excess skin or fat from the arms and would include people who have lost large amounts and weight and therefore have sagging skin. It is not a surgical way of reducing weight. This surgery is advised if you have been able to maintain any weight loss.

This depends on many factors including, weight loss or gain and lifestyle but most people experience excellent permanent results.

How is the Operation Performed?

There are a variety of different techniques for this procedure. It can be by surgical excision alone or in conjunction with liposuction. An incision is made on the underside of the upper arm.

What Type of Anaesthetic is used?

Normally a local anaesthetic with sedation is used.

What is the Recovery Time?

You can normally return to work between 2 and 6 weeks post-operative, depending on your occupation. More Strenuous Activity: 4-6 weeks. Fading and flattening of scars will take approx 3 months to 2 years. Compression garments or bandages may be necessary.

Are There Any Side Effects?

Possible side effects may include Temporary pain, swelling, soreness, numbness, bruising, tiredness for a couple of weeks is normal. All these would of course be fully discussed at the time of your consultation.

Is There Anything I Can Do to Prepare Myself for the Operation?

• Stop the use of Aspirin for at least two weeks before surgery. • We recommend Arnica pre operatively for one week and continued until bruising has completely disappeared. • We also recommend that you do not smoke or drink alcohol for 2 weeks prior to operation. • The condition of the skin can often be improved by using specialist products, this will encourage good healing. • Your Surgical Coordinator will advise about these products.

And Finally Here at MedAesthetics we care about our patients and we will be in regular contact with you after your operation to offer advice and support for as long as you feel you need it. Your relationship with us does not end when the immediate postoperative follow up is complete. If you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact us at any time.

NATURAL WAYS TO CONTROL HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE High blood pressure or DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC hypertension is a very common ailment. It is one of the easiest diagnoses a doctor makes. While most people have come to believe that high blood pressure is a disease, it certainly isn’t. It is only a symptom, and the important question to ask your doctor is what’s causing it. From analysing diagnostic scans, I have observed that the commonest causes of high blood pressure are inflammatory problems with the coronary arteries, and atherosclerosis (hardening of the arteries). Other causes include the presence in the body of heavy metals (mercury, lead, cadmium) and dysfunctions in the neuroendocrine and hormonal organs. In many cases I have been able to normalize a patient’s blood pressure (BP) by treating the cause which can be as simple as detoxifying the body. However when someone has been on anti-hypertensive medications for many years, this can prove a bit

Email your questions and comments to machimannu@gmail.com

more difficult because the body becomes adapted to the drug. Sometimes the cause of high BP lies in the kinds of foods we eat and the lifestyle we have adopted. Foods rich in some types of fats and refined sugars cause high blood pressure and many other diseases. Flour, especially wheat flour is a major culprit and should be avoided whenever possible. Transfat such as those found in margarine and other hydrogenated oils cause inflammation and should also be avoided. There is no evidence to show that saturated fat found in butter, eggs, coconut oil, whole milk etc is harmful to the body, but it may be wise to restrict the intake of these foods. Fruits and Vegetables are certainly healthy additions to any diet. Vegetarians are known to have a lower blood pressure than non-vegetarians.

Garlic, Onions, Ginger and Celery are particularly useful for lowering high blood pressure. Garlic and onions can lower the blood pressure by up to 10 mm Hg. Green leafy vegetables and nuts such as almonds and Brazil nuts are also useful foods for reducing BP. They are rich in magnesium and other nutrients. Magnesium is an effective antihypertensive agent. In hospitals magnesium is used to treat pregnancy induced high blood pressure. Many people with high BP are deficient in magnesium, and in some cases, all the therapy needed is high dose magnesium supplement over a period of 6 weeks. Foods rich in magnesium are; dark chocolate, dried herbs, rice and oat bran, cashews and many seeds and nuts. Foods rich in omega-3 oils such as deep sea fish (salmon and mackerel) are also good for

lowering blood pressure. Omega-3 is anti-inflammatory, and by reducing inflammation in the arteries, helps lower blood pressure. Flax seed oils are also very rich in Omega-3. Exercising is very useful, and all that is needed is a 20 minute brisk walk 3 times a week. Dancing is also good exercise. Take advantage of the many dance classes available and go out and dance! Even if you are shy and feel you cannot dance, convince yourself you are doing it for your blood pressure. Drinking tea and coffee excessively should be avoided. Do you know that drinking more than 5 cups of coffee every day for 2 weeks has been shown to cause an increase in blood pressure? Drink water most of the time. It cleanses your body and prevents dehydration. Call 965071745 for a Full Body Diagnostic Scan

Two glasses of bottled mineral water a day could protect children’s teeth against erosion, according to a study at the University of Dundee in Scotland. The study examined the eating, drinking and brushing habits of 250 schoolchildren aged between 11- and 13-years-old and compared them with the level of dental erosion over an 18-month period. Results showed mineral water reduces damage even if children still consume as many fizzy drinks as their friends. Researchers believe minerals in the water could help shield tooth enamel from destruction by acids that accumulate in the mouth. In a comparison of 16 different factors thought to influence the destruction of tooth enamel, the researchers discovered that only sparkling mineral water and brushing with fluoride toothpaste provided protection to teeth. Dental erosion affects up to 50 percent of adolescents in the UK alone. The tooth becomes sensitive as the surface is stripped away, eventually exposing the dentine, the core of the tooth.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Dry coughs and magic pills… Q

I always suffer from dry cough and don’t seem to cough out anything. I have been to my doctor and after taking antibiotics that weren’t helping; I was sent for a CT scan that still didn’t show up any problems. I will be glad for your thoughts on my health situation.

In my experience the symptoms you describe are usually caused by chronic low grade infection from ‘opportunistic’ harmful microbes in the body. Such microbes are normal inhabitants of the body, but are kept at bay by the immune system. When the immune system becomes weakened, these microbes grow in number and cause all kinds of symptoms related to infections such as fever, joint pains, cough and abdominal upsets. Antibiotics tend to worsen the situation by further depressing the immune system and killing off both beneficial and harmful microbes. Beneficial bacteria such as lactobacillus and bifidus are key players in maintaining a healthy immune system. They suppress the growth of harmful staphylococcus and streptococcus bacteria. If such harmful microbes are not suppressed and allowed to grow unchecked, they can cause infections in many parts of the body including the respiratory, digestive and urinary systems. Respiratory infections can also be caused by viruses. Infections are not easily picked up with X-rays and CT scans. Sputum analysis may also not detect the presence of harmful bacteria, which may remain inactive and unseen in tissues and organs. The best way to treat chronic respiratory infections is to boost the immune system. Probiotics are very useful. Yogurt is a good source of probiotics if you can tolerate lactose. There are a variety of probiotic supplements available, and useful ones should contain ‘billions’ and not ‘millions’ of bacteria per portion. Echinacea is another well studied immune system

enhancer. It has been shown to be very effective against the flu virus. My favourite is reishi extract (Ganoderma Lucidum). Recently a patient of mine called reishi extract capsules ‘magic pills’. Reishi is a mushroom that has been used in Japan for 2000 years. In the past, reishi was reserved for royalty, but today, thanks to improved cultivation methods, they have become available to everyone. Reishi is known as the ‘mushroom of immortality’. It belongs to the rare group of substances known as adaptogens. An adaptogen is a substance that works with the body to heal itself. In traditional Chinese medicine, reishi is known to harmonize the body, mind and spirit. Prescribed medications are also notorious for causing cough. If you are on any medications, it may be a good idea to find out more about their side effects and review them with your doctor. Most drugs have cough listed on the leaflet as a side-effect. The presence of toxic chemicals and substances in the lungs can also cause respiratory problems. Heavy metals and chemicals tend to build-up in the lungs as well as the liver, gall bladder and kidneys. These toxins do not usually cause any problems until much later in life. My blood pressure is normal, but I occasionally have swollen ankles. My doctor prescribed water tablets, but I get terrible headaches with them, and they make me dizzy, so I try not to take those most of the time. I have been told that my heart is weak. How can I strengthen it?

Q A

From what you describe, it seems the way your heart contracts to pump blood – force of contractility of the heart, is weak. The heart muscles are constantly contracting to pump blood around the body, and needs a lot of energy to do so. A few nutrients play very important

roles in the manufacture of energy for the heart. Coenzyme Q 10 is one of them. It is required in the production of ATP (Adenosine Triphosphate) – the energy currency of the body. ATP is the form of energy that is available to our cells in order to carry out activities necessary for our survival. The production of Co Q10 in the body starts to decrease by our mid-30s, and by the age of 60, levels have fallen by half. Most people with heart disorders have been shown to have low blood levels of Coenzyme Q10. I have used the active form of Co-enzyme Q10 known as Ubiquinol to treat many heart related health problems. Ubiquinol is the easier to absorb and more potent form of Co Q10. Acetyl L-Carnitine is another useful supplement for people suffering from congestive heart disorders that cause water retention in the legs. It helps to transport nutrients into the cells for the production of energy. The normal heart stores more Acetyl-L-carnitine and CoQ10 than it needs, but these become quickly used up when the heart undergoes stressful conditions. Chronic diseases also deplete the body of these nutrients. Acetyl-L-carnitine improves the function of the heart, and its effect seems more dramatic when taken on a longer term. A dose of 500 mg three times a day is known to increase exercise time by up to 25%. Magnesium is equally vital for improving cardiac function. Magnesium levels are usually low in people with cardiac problems and magnesium deficiencies are associated with cardiac arrhythmias and heart failures. Diuretics or water tablets are known to deplete the body of magnesium. Magnesium supplements are very beneficial especially to improve heart performance. People on heart medications such as digoxin should speak to their doctor before taking magnesium.

Friday, April 19, 2013

There have been many times when I have been proud to be British. But sometimes today I feel totally ashamed - and no more so when I hear the Left wing abomination making all manner of atrocious comments against Margaret Thatcher. It demonstrates to me just how divided Britain really is; probably more divided now than ever before. It's not just a division between rich and poor, and that's bad enough. It's an appalling division between those who believe in a free market economy; the right to work hard and be rewarded for it, and those who want any handout going and winge about their lot at every opportunity. These latter apologies for human beings have branded Thatcher as an out and out villain, the Iron Lady who decimated the mining industry, the unions in general and in particular the NUM and print unions. They only want to see what they want to see. The fact is that Britain was in an appalling state, virtually run by the unions, and coal was increasingly costly to mine because miners had to go deeper and deeper for it. It could be imported far more cheaply from open-cast mines in eastern Europe. Its demise was inevitable, with or without Thatcher. Britain had to cope with mass strikes, three day weeks, rampant inflation. It had to be sorted with or without Thatcher. The print unions had the newspaper industry in a stranglehold. They controlled the newspapers. They even invented more names on the payroll so extra money could be claimed and shared among members. Market forces were bound to put an end to it, and they did, decimating the jobs of greedy print workers who were paid a fortune. The loony Left forget all that in their blind hatred. But

DIVIDED AND ASHAMED…

The worst of being British the fact is that more mines closed under the Left's golden boy Harold Wilson than under Thatcher. They don't want to accept the unions' good times couldn't go on because they were destroying Britain. OK, the pendulum has swung too far the other way and we have too big a division between the rich and poor. This must be sorted and we need a leader now who can command as much support as Thatcher to sort out the current divisive problems. And boy are they divisive. When we get a presumably intelligent police officer saying he hoped the former prime minister's death had been 'painful and degrading', things have got to a new low in Britain. This despicable 52-yearold Scotland Yard police officer also wrote on a social networking site the world would be a ‘better place’ if David Cameron, too, were dead. He questioned whether a flypast would ‘bomb’ Lady Thatcher’s coffin and said her passing was ‘87 years too late’. He added: "The world is a better place today now that c*** is dead. Now for Cameron, May and Osborne." I have, in previous articles, strongly criticised police found to be out-and-

out liars, or perverted evidence, and here's yet another example of the wrong type of person in the force. Thankfully he has since done the good thing and quit. Good riddance and I hope his pension is taken from him. This police sergeant fell on his sword because of what he wrote on Twitter, which is fast becoming a real problem for many others too. The problem is that people, perhaps tired after a long day, switch on their computers after having a bevvy or two and unleash their frustrations on social networking sites, switching off their brains in the process. It's so easy to fall into the trap of thinking you are alone in a little protective bubble of your own home when you let rip over the web. Like the 17-year-old Kent

girl, chosen to be the UK's first youth communicator between young people and police. She was chosen for her ability to communicate with young people on their wavelength and explain their feelings, frustrations and desires to a police panel. But the girl's past Twitter posts caught up with her; still on the record even though they were posted months if not years earlier. We all know how silly young teenagers can be, keeping up with their peers and saying things they think their "friends" would expect them to say. I think people are beginning to realise that social networking sites are dangerous places to be. People are opening up their private lives for public examination like never before, and many will suffer the consequences. Last week I wrote about the crazy police who think about their wallets or purses more than pride in the job when they suffer injury. We now hear of a WPC called to deal with a cannabis factory. This drama queen thought she was being overcome by fumes and tried to open a window. But she broke the glass and cut her thumb. Hey presto, the wimpy woman then sued because she claimed her bosses had failed in a duty of care by not providing her with protective gloves in case she injured herself. How they were expected to know she was going to open a window and the glass was going to break, goodness knows. A stupid judge awarded

her nearly £5,000 in compensation against taxpayers, but now the police force has appealed. Two points. Firstly, a police officer must accept that the job has risks. How on earth can any police force protect an officer against every eventuality? Secondly, if a woman wants to be treated as an equal she must accept risks that a man would take. Can you imagine the ridicule if a man started wimping around because he cut his thumb by opening a window with too much force. He would be quite rightly ridiculed. If women want to be treated as equals they must take equal knocks. If they want to be wrapped in cotton wool, then stop banging on about equal rights and accept working in back room roles while the men do the real policing and accept less pay. Women can't have it both ways - even in crazy Britain. I hope the appeal judges tell this pain in the backside WPC what she can do with her stupid money-grabbing claim.

Banks have been told to make money more affordable for home buyers by keeping interest rates low The government have even made extra cash available at very low rates so they can do it. So what do these creative accountants behind the banks do? They lower the interest rates and raise the fees to set up a mortgage. So all they are doing is giving with one hand and taking with the other. Some set-up fees cost up to £3,000. Oh for a government which takes instant action to combat these far too clever for their own good accountants. The government should have imposed a maximum interest rate for mortgages and a maximum arrangement fee. Simple. If I can think of it, why not people earning a fortune? The government rabbit on about pay day loan companies and want to control

them. Simple. Impose a maximum interest rate, and make it illegal to exceed it. That would sort out the blood suckers. Last week my credit card bill was due for payment by the bank, but because it was a big one, the bank refused payment. Anticipating it, I went on line minutes after the transaction failed, and paid the full amount, on line, immediately. The acknowledgement that the company had received the money came into my email within minutes. When I received my credit card statement I was astonished to see I was charged £76 interest for late payment. They claimed they had not received the money for another two days after they had sent the email acknowledgement. Illegally extracting money or what? Of course, the girl at the end of the phone, instantly agreed to put the money back into my credit card account. But if I had not spotted it, the company would have got away with it. Banks, credit card companies - not good enough. It's time to get your act together.

Finally, do you remember me writing, a few weeks ago, about sea ice around Antarctic being one million square kilometres greater than the 30-year average, and questioning why the meteorologists appeared to be very quiet about it? Well, it seems they have been quietly working behind the scenes to try to explain why. The theory is that more ice has been melting and this has increased the amount of sea water with less salt in it, which freezes at higher temperatures. So the end result is ice has formed and is forming more readily. It's an example of how the earth can heal itself when change happens - and we now have far more ice reflecting the sun's heat back into space, making the Antarctic even colder.

Friday, April 19, 2013

ANIMAL RESCUE MAKES ITS BARK AT EL RANCHO LAST November, APAH animal rescue Charity held their annual Fun Dog Show, for the first time at El Rancho Restaurant on the La Marquesa Road just outside Los Montesinos. It was a huge success, and it was agreed that future Dog Shows would be held at what is a perfect location for this type of event. So on Saturday April 27, APAH will once again hold the first of its two Fun Dog Shows – plus barbecue - at El Rancho. Registration for the show begins at 1pm and judging is due to start at 2.30pm The previous show was criticised because there was nothing pet-related on offer apart from the actual judging of the dogs entered. The upcoming event will be very different as APAH has contacted local businesses who are happy to be a part of the fund-raising event. The owner of the Food Cupboard in San Miguel

has promised to bring along lots of 'doggy treats', doggy fridge magnets and other pet-related gifts. Mundoviviente, who have recently moved premises from Catral to Los Montesinos, will be there with lots of dog and cat food, pet beds, kennels, scratch posts etc. The owner of Pampermepetsspain will also be present, offering grooming and trimming. Shampooing will be a little difficult, though she’d be delighted to make appointments for dogs who need a little more than just a trim. Finally a very talented photographer will be offering to take portrait photos of dogs; especially those whose owners want to capture that 'rosette moment'. APAH hopes lots of people will bring their dogs and support the work the organisation. carries out with abandoned dogs and cats.

TOP TRIBUTE TONY IS BACK IN TOWN! TONY LEE, whose 2012 tribute to Gene Pitney and Roy Orbison was a seven-venue sellout, is returning to the Costa Blanca. Audience last year were amazed at how incredibly close to both artists Tony's voice and style is. And Peter Day from Jukebox Promotions says: "He was inaudibly well received last year and rightly so. We had a job to get him this year but he is back for a tour of nine venues starting on April 28. Having worked with some of the biggest names from the Pitney and Orbison era and been invited by the Pitney family to the USA for special Commemoration shows and events, he is recognised as the very best!’’ Book early - tickets are 8.50€ unless stated, from venues or online at www.jukeboxpromotions.co.uk More info at the

website or call 695135134 - Shows start at 8-30pm Dates & venues: 28th April - The Lounge Bar,Torrevieja 966922134 30th April - La Marina Sport Complex 966796389 1st May - Costa Narejos Hotel, Los Alcazares 965400188 2nd May - Rocajuna, Punta Prima 664591795 / 965997260 3rd May - Bar Restaurant San Miguel, Cooperativa Murla, Jalon Valley 633076588 / 633694740 5th May - Rendezvous, Campoamor (inland Campoamor - near Mercadona and La Fuente Centre. Tickets €10 includes a great buffet) 608467597 6th May - Emerald Isle, La Florida 965327138 7th May - The Club House, Camposol Golf 968978855 8th May - The Club, Quesada 966717028

FROM RAQUEL’S DANCE EROSKI ADAPT APPEAL CRISIS HIT SO WELL! AGE CONCERN FLAMTASTIC

EROSKI Supermarket’s Spanish Cookery Workshops for the ADAPT association within the store at Dos Mares, San Pedro have proved so popular that extra weeks have been added to the course. Last week, Jose Manuel from El Pozo gave an interesting talk about Iberian pig farming and the quality of ham which

depends on the diet of the pigs. He then gave a demonstration on how to slice the ham and the tools needed, while Elena showed how to prepare and cook cordero (lamb). ADAPT meet on the first Saturday of the month at Hogar de Pensionistas, San Pedro at 10:30am and welcome new members. www.adaptsanpedro.eu

Yes, even Charities are feeling the pressure and in our 15 years on the Costa Blanca we have never encountered such hard times. We are finding it very hard to cover all our costs and to make sure our beneficiaries are receiving the excellent care they are used to. Our shops in Torrevieja and Los Montesinos need your help with donations of clothes, bric-a-brac, bedding and small items of furniture. Our shops and the bars and groups who raise money for us are our main source of income that helps us continue our work in helping the elderly. Please think of us as you do your spring cleaning and bring any items to either of our shops or to the Day Centre in La Siesta. We can also collect, just phone 96 678 6887. THANK YOU

TICKETS are now on sale for the new Raquel Peña Flamenco Dance Company production at the Torrevieja Municipal Theatre. If you have never seen one of their shows, come and see why the Pilar de la Horadada based company is considered one of the finest in Spain. Enjoy the excitement, colour and fire of

many new choreographies, designer costumes and old-time favourites requested by the audience. A €2,500 donation will be given to AFA, the Torreveija Alzheimer Association. For information please contact the Company office at 630 689 431 or at info@flamencoforall.com

Fashion for a fiver! THE Ladies Charity Fashion Show at Quesada Country Club on April 25 is too good to miss. Tickets are just €2 and the show by Creana features clothes starting from just €5! The action starts with a Flower Arrangement demonstration by Jenni Ray from Casa la Pedrera and also features a raffle for a

Food and Drink hamper. Husbands, partners and chauffeurs can enjoy tea and preordered cup cakes by calling 966 719 160. To reserve your fashion show tickets please email sueinthesun@hotmail.co.uk. Ticket and raffle monies will be donated via Anne Day to The Children's Home in Elche.

Friday, April 19, 2013

REV RAF’S TORTUROUS TREK RECREATES JUNGLE MISSION THE pastor of a Torrevieja church set off this week to travel deep into the jungle in South America and retrace the steps of missionaries generations ago. Rev Rafael Restrepo of the International Christian Assembly is being accompanied by church member Brian Borrmann on the three-week mission trip to Bolivia, during which they will also visit a newly-established church. Two churches, ICA Torrevieja and Asamblea Cristiana in Murcia, were established by Rafael and his wife Mary, and in October, 2010, they sent a missionary to Santa Cruz, Bolivia. Rene Cuellar and his wife Jenny have been working in Santa Cruz with children and adults and care for 300 children in the city. They have now established a church in a jungle area called 4 de Marzo, about 600km from Santa

Cruz, caring for about 70 children and adults. Rafael and Brian will be taking children's and adults' teaching materials to Santa Cruz and 4 de Marzo, also teaching at seminars in Santa Cruz. They will also be meeting with leaders from various churches to share principles of leadership and Gospel presentation. In addition Rafael and Brian will visit Montevideo, Uruguay, were Rafael and Mary helped plant a church in his first mission project in 1987-1989. They will also be teaching and sharing with the congregation and church leaders in Montevideo. The Restrepos have been missionaries since 1987. The ICA church also has had a mission point in Cuba since 2002 where they help Cuban pastors and seminary students.

JUNGLE BOUND: Rev Rafael Restrepo (left) and Brian Borrman

WHAT A HULLABALOO! Pink Ladies cash

Torry calls tune at Spanish barbershop convention TORREVIEJA quartet Hullabaloo were amongst the winners at the Spanish Association of Barbershop Singers annual convention in Benalmadena. They picked “Picking Up Cups” for the Best Senior Quartet and the closely contested Best Novice Quartet. Steve Harper, Dudley Jones, Kevin Drury and Mike Treanor are all members of The Torrevieja Barbershop Harmonisers and one of the four is into his eighties, which really does prove that you are never too old! Fourmidables, another quartet from Torrevieja, were the overall Grand Champion gold medallists in the Male Quartet competition, another splendid result following closely on from their successes in the European Championships.

in on Soul Power

Maria Wilson and the Pink Ladies raised €422 for the AECC cancer charity at Breakaways’ 60s and 70s night with the fabulous Soul Power band. The Soul and Motown combo had the 100-plus guests on their feet from the word go and €596 was

You can hear both these quartets together with the Torrevieja Barbershop Harmonisers and the Velvetones in An Evening of Close Harmony at the Escuela de Musica y Cultura in Los Montesinos on Sunday April 28 (8pm). Tickets are only 4€ and can be bought on the door,

or reserve your seat by calling 966713342 The evening has been oganised to raise funds for the AFECANCER support group and all proceeds will go to them. The Harmonisers always welcome new recruits and any men who enjoy singing (even if only in the shower) will receive a very warm wel-

raised from the raffle fo little Finley who has PTLS, a rare genetic syndrome. If you think you can help the Pink Ladies email maria.wilson.9028@facebook.com Soul Power appear every Monday at the Celtic Drop, Playa Flamenca. Call 680 572 427.

come. Join us any Tuesday afternoon at Los Rosales restaurante (Lemon Tree road near petrol station) or come to our Open Day at Los Rosales on May 7. This will be followed by a Learn to Sing in Harmony course to be held over three Tuesdays. Or just phone 96 671 3342 for more details.

ELIJAH CHOIRS IN SUPREME FORM

SOME 50 singers entertained an enthralled audience – including local Spanish dignatories - with an impressive performance of the oratorio "Elijah" by Felix Mendelssohn last Friday evening. The event, which took place in the wonderful acoustics of the Iglesia in Pilar de la Horadada, was organised by the Chorale and Vivace choirs under the baton of Christine Eames. The work, which is probably the most

ambitious in the choral repertoire, made use of two soloists specially brought in from the UK - Arthur Berwick (bass) as Elijah and Rodney Porter (tenor) as Obadiah. There was also an opportunity for homegrown singers Patricia Flint, Jennifer Morton, Eva Olsson, Katy Pargeter, June Philllips, Eve Suffield, Dennis Gill, Wim van Hugten and Tom Pargeter. The very experienced guest soloists held the audience spellbound; they

were note-perfect and clearly enjoyed playing their dramatic roles. The two choirs had been learning and rehearsing for three months under chorus master Tom Pargeter and musical director Christine Eames and received a standing ovation at the end. The singers were ably accompanied by pianist Jose Alberto Morales Rodriguez. Part of the proceeds of a collection will go to the Manos Unidas orphanage project in Mali.

Friday, April 19, 2013

UK HEADLINES

FAREWELL MAGGIE

MARGARET Thatcher was given a grand ceremonial funeral on Wednesday which attempted to capture both the "mythological figure" and the daughter of a Grantham grocer. Baroness Thatcher's children Carol and Mark led the mourners, while her 19-year-old granddaughter Amanda stepped into the spotlight to deliver the first reading during the service at St Paul's Cathedral. And she was unfazed by the front row presence of the Queen, who was paying her last respects to one of the 12 Prime Ministers who have featured during her 61-year reign. The pews were packed with more than 2,300 guests - with political allies, old foes and more distant admirers joining in a service based on the book of common prayer but which reflected Lady Thatcher's Methodist upbringing and love of British composers in its hymns and music. Lady Thatcher, who died from a stroke last week at the age of 87, had requested no eulogy at her service. So it fell to the Bishop of London the Right Reverend Chartres to reflect on her life and service through the prism of her faith. He said: "At such a time, the parson should not aspire to the judgments which are proper to the politician; instead, this is a place for ordinary human compassion of the kind that is reconciling. It is also the place for the simple truths which transcend political debate. Above all it is the place for hope. "But it must be difficult for those members of her family and close associates to recognise the wife, mother and grandmother in the mythological figure." He added: "In a setting like this, in the presence of the leaders of the nation, it is easy to forget the immense hurdles she had to climb. "Beginning in the upper floors of her

The Mirror

father's grocer's shop in Grantham, through Oxford as a scientist and, later, as part of the team that invented Mr Whippy ice cream, she embarked upon a political career. "By the time she entered Parliament in 1959 she was part of a cohort of only 4% of women in the House of Commons. "She had experienced many rebuffs along the way, often on the short list for

candidates only to be disqualified by prejudice against a woman - and, worse, a woman with children. "She applied herself to her work with formidable energy and passion. But she continued to reflect on how faith and politics related to one another." There was laughter as he told an anecdote about sitting next to the former PM at a City function, where she told him, "Don't touch the duck pate, Bishop - it's very fattening", and sadness as he reflected on the "grievous blow" of losing her husband Denis. Chancellor George Osborne was pictured wiping away tears and Prime Minister David Cameron also seemed to be wiping his eyes.

Mr Cameron gave the gospel reading at the service, after Lady Thatcher requested the Prime Minister at the time of her death should read at her funeral. Also among the mourners were fellow former PMs Sir John Major, Tony Blair and Gordon Brown, and her fellow Tory Michael Heseltine - who helped bring about her downfall as Prime Minister by challenging her for the Tory leadership. Geoffrey Howe, whose resignation speech in 1990 marked the dying days of her leadership, was also at the service, along with more than 30 members of the Iron Lady's cabinets from 1979-90, every member of the current Cabinet and dignitaries from 170 countries around the globe. Lady Thatcher's coffin had made the journey to St Paul's first by hearse from the Palace of Westminster to the Church of St Clement Danes, then by gun carriage through the streets of London. There had been fears the procession would be hit by protests after death parties broke out last week when it was announced the divisive figure had passed away. But most seemed to stay away, barring a focus for demonstrators at Ludgate Circus, on the approach to St Paul's, although broadcasters were criticised for cutting coverage of the procession passing the area to show the Queen and Prince Philip's arrival at the cathedral instead.The fury at Thatcher's legacy was felt elsewhere though, with a dummy paraded through the streets of Goldthorpe , South Yorkshire, while the military procession took place in London. Following the service Lady Thatcher's coffin, draped in the Union flag and topped by a white flower arrangement with a message from her family, was taken away by hearse for a private cremation service in Mortlake, south west London.

Now it’s Batman and Robbing... A man who hit the headlines when he handed his friend over to police dressed as Batman has himself fallen foul of the law. Stan Worby, 39, was filmed on CCTV escorting his pal Danny Frayne to a Bradford police station following allegations of fraud. But now both Mr Worby and his friend have been accused of trespassing in a garage and stealing £770 worth of power tools. A West Yorkshire police spokesman said a vehicle containing suspected stolen property was stopped by police. ‘Two men aged 39 and 26 are due to appear before Bradford magistrates’ court on April 26 charged with burglary,’ he said. ‘The men were arrested

shortly after 4am on Sunday.’ Footage of Mr Worby handing his friend over to police in February led to frenzied speculation as to who the masked crimefighter may be. It later emerged Mr Worby had been at Wembley supporting Bradford City in the Capital One Cup final before returning to take his friend to a police station in a minibus. Mr Worby, who works for a Chinese takeaway in Bradford, said after the earlier incident: ‘I’m no superhero. I eat kebabs. I never run anywhere. The furthest I walk is from my house to my car.’ Mr Frayne pleaded not guilty to burglary when he appeared before magistrates. Mr Worby has not yet entered a plea.

Friday, April 19, 2013

UK HEADLINES

Bostonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pressure cooked death trap Tragic mum Fiona: The final picture WITH her baby bump clearly visible, this is desperate Fiona Anderson as she drops off the keys to the flat where her three young children lay dead. The chilling CCTV images show the 23-year-old who was seven months pregnant as she arrived at the house where her ex-boyfriend was staying, less than two hours before she fell to her death. Miss Anderson, who it is thought had one of the children's teddy bears in her pocket, was unable to speak to Craig McLelland, 24, who she believed had left her for another woman. Instead she handed over the keys to someone else and told him to give the keys to Mr McLelland. Unbeknown to anyone, the couple's children Levina, three, Addy, two, and 11-month-old Kyden were already lying dead in the rented flat a quarter of a mile away. The footage taken at 6:20am then shows Miss Anderson looking resigned as she walks away from the house. At 8am she was found dead after she fell 40ft to her death from a car park roof in Lowestoft, Suffolk, on Monday. Police then went to her flat half a mile away at 11:20am and discovered the bodies of her children. It is thought that she may have wanted Mr McLelland, who she stabbed during a row the night before, to have found the bodies. Tuesday, Miss Anderson's family said they wished more had been done to recognise their daughter's mental health problems as friends claimed social services had turned their back on her. In a statement, they said: 'Fiona was a beautiful, intelligent girl and a loving and caring person, but she had suffered from mental illness since she was young and we believe she was driven to her actions yesterday. 'This was not our Fiona - she was not herself. She cared passionately about others but often brought stress on herself by caring too much. She was gentle but ended up under too much pressure. 'We wish more had been done to recognise her mental health problems.'

US authorities have released pictures of the explosive devices used in the twin blasts which hit the Boston Marathon on Monday. The images show twisted pieces of a metal container, wires, a battery and a small circuit board which exploded close to the finish line at the race. In another, a piece of charred wire can be seen attached to a small box and a twisted metal lid with bolts. The FBI said on Tuesday that a pressure cooker may have been used to build the bombs, with nails, ball bearings and other metal packed around the explosive. The device may also have been hidden inside rucksacks placed on the ground near the finish line. Richard DesLauriers, FBI agent in charge said the investigation to find those responsible would be worldwide. He vowed: "We will go to the ends of the Earth to identify the subject or subjects who are responsible for this despicable crime." More than 1,000 officers are working on the investigation which agents have said in the largest the Boston bureau has ever worked on. Pressure cooker bombs have been used in attacks in Afghanistan, India, Nepal and Pakistan, according to a July 2010 FBI report. But the techniques of making them is understood to be known to domestic US extremists. Officials said that there was no indication that al Qaeda or other foreign

Daily Mail

The explosive devices were packed into pressure cookers hidden inside duffel bags. extremist organisations were behind the attack, but they added the investigation was still at an early stage. It is not yet known what was used to set off the devices. Special agent DesLauriers said experts would reconstruct the devices at the FBI laboratory in Quantico, Virginia. The

FBI also appealed for anyone who was in the area of the marathon or Boston airport in the last few days to send in any pictures they may have taken. Investigators are already understood to be examining 6,000 movies-worth of CCTV footage from cameras in the area. Websites and newspa-

pers were already featuring images which they claimed showed people suspected of carrying out the attacks or the devices. The FBI said it was looking at one sent to a local TV station which appeared to show a bag next to a mailbox in the area where one of the bombs went off. Jason Pack, FBI spokesman in Boston, said: "We're taking a look at hundreds of photos and that's one of them." Three people were killed and more than 170 others injured after the two explosions around four hours into the famous marathon. Two of those killed were Krystle Campbell, 29, and eight-year-old Martin Richard. The third is 23-year-old Chinese student Lu Lingzi Nine children were among the injured, who were aged between two and 71.

Friday, April 19, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

MARTA MURDER MYSTERY AN ABOUT-TURN in the case of murdered Sevilla teenager Marta del Castillo Casanueva means the court will review a key witness' involvement. Self-confessed killer and ex-boyfriend of the victim, Miguel Carcaño, has now changed his story yet again and this time claims his stepbrother Francisco Javier Delgado was in fact the one who murdered the young lady. Carcaño claims he and Delgado were arguing about money issues when Marta tried to intervene and calm them down, at which point Delgado hit her over the head with the barrel of the gun he carried in his job as security guard. They then, according to Carcaño, took Marta's body to an abandoned stretch of land and buried her. Delgado has been arrested but was not told why he was helping with inquiries and, during questioning; he exercised his right not to say anything.

He has since said Carcaño's version is 'radically false'. Delgado, along with his girlfriend María García, and Carcaño's friend Samuel Benítez were all acquitted when the trial over the 17-year-old's death was concluded last year. The accused known as 'El Cuco', who was 15 at the time of Marta's death and therefore subject to laws covering juvenile delinquents rather than adult criminals, was released on March 5 this year after serving two years and 11 months in a youth detention centre, charged with covering up the crime. Carcaño was jailed for 21 years and three months, and will finish serving his sentence on May 8, 2030, when he is aged 41. This new information means police have now opened a further search for Marta's remains, having already dredged the river Guadalquivir, combed a landfill site and carried out excavations in numerous remote areas outside the city each time the killer's story changed.

Tenerife’s record sting in the tale

POLICE alerted to a giant wasp nest in an abandoned house in Tenerife discovered it might be the biggest the world has ever seen. They found the house overrun with literally millions of wasps and their nest occupying the whole of the top floor. The nest is so large that officials think it will unseat New Zealand as the home of the largest recorded in history. The current Guinness record holder was a giant nest found on a farm near Auckland in 1963. It measured more than 12 feet long, 5 feet in diameter, and about 18 feet in circumference. Although the New Zealand nest was made of wood scrapings that the insects chewed up to create a paper mache material, it was so heavy that it came crashing out of a tree and split in two on the ground. Experts believe the Tenerife nest was built by an African species of wasp that

migrated across the 70-mile stretch of water separating Africa from Tenerife. The type of wasp which normally inhabits that area of Spanish territory tends to live in gardens, and doesn’t built nests anywhere near as large as the one found in the home. Another gigantic wasp nest was found a few years ago in a pub in Southampton, England. Although the 6ft 5in nest and was home to close to 500,000 wasps — it still pales in comparison to the house-invading Spanish nest. A typical wasp’s nest will contain between 4,000 and 5,000 wasps, experts say. Some of the larger colonies can house tens of thousands, though it is rare for the nests to grow much larger than that. Officials said they blocked off the house in Tenerife, but still haven’t figured out how to deal with the nest and its inhabitants.

To date Marta has never been found. Marta's grandfather, José Antonio Casanueva, says that although the family knew the police had restarted the search, they did not know exactly where they would be looking for the teenager's body. Carcaño has been on day-release twice in the custody of authorities to pinpoint where Marta's remains were dumped. Back in January 2009, Marta, then 17, arranged to meet with her recent exboyfriend, Miguel Carcaño, then 20, to ask him about 'rumours' she had heard he had spread about her. According to the accused, this final and fatal meeting led to a heated discussion, during which he threw an ashtray at her in temper, knocking her unconscious. Fearing her dead, Carcaño said he panicked and threw her body in the river Guadalquivir, with the help of Delgado, Benítez and El Cuco whilst García 'cleaned up the blood' in the house Carcaño and Delgado shared in Camas, near Sevilla. It later transpired Marta (pictured) was pinned down and gang-raped by Carcaño and possibly the others, and El Cuco may have been one of those who restrained her during the process. The various accused parties eventually hinted that she had been strangled and then dumped in the river, before rectifying and saying she was left on a landfill site. None of the five involved has ever admitted to Marta's whereabouts, and some of them have said they cannot remember.

Osteoporosis drug taken off shelves

HEALTH authorities have withdrawn a drug used to treat osteoporosis from sale since one of the ingredients may be associated with bone tumour formation. According to the Spanish Medication and Health Products Agency (AEMPS), nasal sprays for the crippling bone degeneration disease containing Calcitonin have been taken off the shelves and they are updating information about similar drugs prescribed in injectable format.

Clinical trials have revealed that there may be a link between Calcitonin and a higher risk of cancerous tumours. The AEMPS has called for doctors to cease prescribing, and for pharmacies to stop dispensing any medication containing the ingredient for the moment. It also recalled that anyone taking Calcitonin preparations as injections should only do so at the minimum effective dose and for very short periods of time.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Focus on

CIUDAD QUESADA

Endless Fun And Games At Quesada Mini Golf If you are looking for an enjoyable day out, why not pay a visit to the beautiful full size Mini Golf Course in Quesada. You can enjoy a game of golf with friends and family, then wine and dine yourselves in the lovely restaurant on the terrace overlooking the course, or if you prefer enjoy a meal and a drink in the garden area. Choose from a wide selection of snacks and main courses at prices to suit all pockets. The top quality food on offer is rapidly gaining a reputation as being the best in Quesada. Free Wi-Fi is available and parties and special events of all kinds are catered for. Quesada Mini Golf is open daily from 9am and is based in Calle Los Arcos in Quesada. Turn left just before the arches and you will find it at the end of the street. For more information and reservations Tel: 966 189 599

Make Someone Feel Special With The Treasure Chest The Treasure Chest Jewellery and Gift shops have been on the Costa Blanca now for the last 8 years and offer a friendly service in all 3 of their shops. The Shops are located in Quesada, Villa Martin and Playa Flamenca and offer an extensive range of gift ideas from simple affordable bookmarks, pens and travel clocks to a beautiful collection of Lladro and Nao from Valencia. The Treasure Chest also supplies a stunning selection of watches from Sekonda, Citizen and Police, and an amazing variety of cards is available, from comical to romantic and for all occasions. They offer a complimentary gift wrapping service and an â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;in-houseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; jewellery repair service is provided by Goldsmith and skilled craftsman Dermot, who has 30 years experience in the business and will restore any broken jewellery items to their former glory. Treasure Chest, Quesada is open 10am till 6pm and Saturday 10am till 2pm.

For Complete Peace of Mind, Let Spanish Insurance Take Care of it! What can Spanish Insurance offer you? Spanish Insurance can offer you Free claims advice. You can email your problem to them at spanish-insurance@hotmail.com and they will be in touch within one working day. Spanish Insurance recently opened a 2nd office, based in the Los Dolses Commercial centre in La Zenia and pride themselves in giving honest reliable advice, cutting prices and providing a great service. Spanish Insurance offer Home, Motor, Business, Health, Life and Travel Insurance at extremely competitive rates. They also provide Community Insurance and will put together insurance cover that is suitable for everyone. Spanish Insurance also provides Funeral cover with affordable monthly premiums, giving you and your family complete peace of mind no matter what age you are. Spanish Insurance have a team of fully trained Insurance advisors who can come to you if you cannot get to them, and will visit you at a time convenient to you.

Your new home with BPP! Bestpricedpromotions offer a range of differing services to help in the process of buying and selling houses, this includes mortgage advice, money transfers, translations and free valuation service. The company collaborates with a growing number of European, Scandinavian, and Russian estate agents In connection with BPP we have a translation side to the business under to company name Translingua. Services range from written and verbal translations, notary services, NIE numbers, residencia and transfer of vehicle ownership.

Friday, April 19, 2013

La Fuente Commercial Centre opposite Campoamor Golf. A Must to Visit!! There Is Always a Treat Waiting at LeCafet LeCafet is all about having a good time! We are a one of a kind business. One of a kind, because, we combine good food, fresh bread, sweet cakes... all together and all this in a nice, warm and modern atmosphere. We value high quality and friendly service! LeCafet is the unique fresh bakery in the area! Every night our bakers make fresh bread, rolls, cakes... and to deliver the best quality, most of our materials are imported from Belgium! Don't forget our restaurant! LeCafet is serving breakfast, lunch and dinner! You are very welcome at every moment of the day. Choose from our a la carte menu with a variety of daily specials. We are famous for our fillet steak with peppercorn sauce! LeCafet is available to you for hosting your parties, receptions, creating your personal birthday cake, meeting people and so much more... Visit us and see for yourself! Le Cafet

Viva La Vida: Your Local Pub In The Sun!

Viva la Viva is situated on the front of La Fuente in between the Farmacia and convenience store, with a large south facing terrace Jim and Paul have had Vivas for 4 years but since last year Edie Doherty who has managed some of the best establishments in the area became a business partner and has brought with him a wealth of experience and success Recently the bar has had a complete transformation and now has a very modern and classy look and feel to it. Vivas has had a happy hour from day one 7 days a week every day of the year and is the longest on the centre Strongbow, Fosters, Amstel 2 euros a pint, Bottle Beers from 1.50 euro, Spirit including mixer 2.50euro House Wines 1.50 per glass The Kitchen - Breakfast - English and Continental, selections of snacks and sandwiches, coffee and cakes 2.50 euro Sunday Roast always sell out booking strongly advised which is followed by Steve Clarke with Karaoke Saturdays 1st class entertainer Paul Christie singing Gene Pitney and all your favourite songs - Tuesday - Neville Tarot and Palm reading, Thursday - Free Fun Quiz From May 3 course evening meals will be served until 10pm

CRYSTALS RESTAURANT SIMPLY THE BEST Come and dine in a beautiful spacious surroundings at Crystals Restaurant. It is under new ownership and is situated on the top floor of the Fuente Centre behind the Pharmacy We are open Tuesday to Saturday for Lunch 12.30 to 4pm and have a Menu Del Dia of 2 courses including a drink for 9.95 euros. We also have an extensive lunch time menu In the evening we reopen at 7pm serving Menu Del Noche, or a fantastic Al La Carte. Why not try our renowned Sunday Lunch served from 1pm until 7pm We also cater for Weddings, Club Functions and Special Occasions and can arrange a menu suited to your needs. If you would like more information, or to book a table, telephone the new owners Sean or Aggie on 966 186 835 or 698 392 523

Exquisite Outfits and Home Entertainment, All Under One Roof! Tiger Feet Fashion Boutique Tiger Feet, now has its vast array of summer wear arriving weekly ranging from dresses, sandals, handbags and jewellery. Owners Julia and Alan ensure that the boutique is always stocked with the hottest trends in clothing there is also a large range of greeting cards and gift vouchers for special occasions Opening Hours Mon - Sat 11am - 6pm Sunday 2pm - 6pm Cloud Nine Cloud Nine Satellite Systems (situated inside Tiger Feet) offers all your TV needs, no monthly payments or rebroadcasting, package options available Alan will be pleased to discuss your requirements and give a demonstration of the system in operation within their office For more information contact Alan on 965 320 900 - 600 856 937

A Tasty Treat for Every Occasion Nearly two years have passed since Denise opened â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;My Piece of Cakeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; the cake shop and cafe/bar near Villamartin. Now located on the ground level of CC La Fuente the best homemade cakes, pastries, sandwiches, paninis and other snacks on the Costa Blanca are created and served here. Whether you want a birthday cake, cupcakes, a very special wedding cake or just enjoy a tranquil light meal, afternoon tea or enjoy a drink, you really are in safe hands here. You see this is not just a cake shop it is a fully stocked cafe bar too and is open from 9am until 9pm every day except Sunday when the hours are 10am to 6 pm. Cake makers of all skill levels regularly visit not only to buy equipment and essential materials, but also to swap ideas about decorations and designs. For quality and service visit My Piece Of Cake.

Friday, April 19, 2013

Horrorscopes Aries March 21 - April 19 A trip to the doctors should quell any anxiety you have about being a pair of curtains, although his diagnosis may be less than helpful. The rate of absorption into your skin will increase three fold today as Mars combined with Jupiter to create... well, whatever is created to allow for that. I suppose. Always think "Take the easy way out". You won't go wrong.

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Your sporting life will keep you in good stead for the summer olympics. Unruly behaviour by your closest friends can be solved using cake-forks. Lots of different shades of grey help you know that metal objects are 3 dimensional. Show a loved one you care. There's no harm in taking the day off.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 A week of rest may be all you need for your broken leg to recover. Doctors may be stunned by a random discovery they make whilst examining you. Potato salesmen may call today and leave you a spud on your doorstep. If you're ignorant are you blessed? Only with ignorance, my stupid friend.

Cancer June 21 - July 22 Any joke you have to seriously think about today is not worth 'getting'. When we tell you that it's 'cryptic', we basically mean that we made it up. In the land that time forgot, everyone had a hard time. Anything someone says today that is unkind is probably meant in jest.

By Pandora Leo July 23 - August 22 Don't let others stifle your creativity. It's alright to make paintings out of their droppings. Don't be in the market for any of what anyone is selling. Dead clowns will try to follow you home. Release your anger safely, write a story for TheSpoof. The latin phrase for what you're feeling right now is: "Non semper inquisit damascus aroooooo!"

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Your neighbour's taste for loud music may cause them to incur an unfortunate accident. Today is a series of blunders that follow each other. Today is not your lucky day. It's tomorrow instead! So that's something to look forward to whilst your picking up your teeth with your broken arm.

Libra September 23 - October 22 When faced with life's problems you generally prefer to stride in with both boots kicking. However, if today's "life's problem" is that you stepped in lots of dog poop, please try not to kick so wildly. Remember to chew before you swallow. Not that today is going to be the worst day in your life, but...paraffin is an effective way of erasing memories.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 All this week you are set for uncontrollable setbacks to all your plans. There's nothing you can do, so you might as well start being awful to people you suspect might cause your setbacks. Something will stir your memory today and it may take a few hours for you to resolve your sense of deja vu.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Today will be fraught with exciting wonderment and thrills for at least somebody you know. A film will set you straight about a number of things today and will also serve to kill between one and a half and two and a half hours of the day. Probably. Sorry, it's a slow day for you, there's nothing much I can say that will make it any more interesting.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 If some things start to appear impossible, it may be time to invent robots. Dogs will find themselves inexplicably attracted to your shins, this week. The re-animation of dead tissue may become an issue for you later this month. Fault for your situation can be accredited to anyone you wish - go nuts!

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Peaches and cream are a cheap and enjoyable dessert menu for any supper guests. Your "rustic charms" are not an excuse for being smelly and dirty. Food is a cheap source of food. Eat well. You think you're so advanced, but when was the last time monkeys had to worry about their finances? Your lucky drink for today is: Coke.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Do what you feel is right in your heart. Flapping your arms like a bird is a good way to call attention to yourself. Please remember today that most of your god-like powers have been taken from you in order to make you a better demi-god. Other people are not as crazy as you make them out to be.

Friday, April 19, 2013

An ultra-high-performance Jaguar F-type is being considered by the company’s specialist engineers, with the range-topping model potentially being powered by a supercharged V8 with as much as 600bhp. The car is believed to be at the planning stage but would become the most powerful Jaguar on sale, cementing its status at the heart of the brand’s sporting values. Although it would probably be powered by the 5.0-litre supercharged V8 found in models such as the recently launched Jaguar XJR and XKR-S, the power output would stretched beyond the 542bhp found in those cars. Jaguar boss Adrian Hallmark didn’t confirm the project. But he conceded that more limited-series vehicles in the spirit of the XKR-S GT, revealed at the New York motor show last month and set to be built in a run of no more than 50 units, were likely to happen because of their marketing value as halo cars. And, more important, Jaguar sees them as test beds for future technology that can used in more mainstream cars. “Clearly, building a run of 30

600bhp Jaguar F-type to 50 exclusive GTs isn’t going to have any impact on the fortunes of the company in sales terms, but the importance of these projects lies in the knowledge they give us,” he said. “Jaguar is already well known for its ability to create sporty, dynamic cars, but the XKR-S GT project has shown us that we can learn more by pushing the envelope. Lessons learned from the dynamics, aero and braking work on that car will enter the mainstream.” Hallmark also confirmed that, during testing for the XKR-S GT, engineers had experimented with higheroutput versions of the supercharged V8. “There’s a lot you can do with supercharging,” he said, “but the lesson we learned was that driveability must always come before brute force. For most people, 542bhp is enough anyway, and whatever power you have, the trick is in being able to get it down on the

road. You can have all the power in the world if you want it, but getting the traction to use it is the key.” The hot F-type is unlikely to reach production until at least 2016, but rumours suggest that a one-off concept could appear as early this year’s Goodwood Festival of Speed, where Jaguar has traditionally shown innovative projects ahead of schedule. Last year, for instance, an F-type prototype was driven on the hill by Jaguar chassis guru Mike Cross. This year’s festival celebrates the 50th anniversary

of the Porsche 911, a key sales rival to the F-type, giving added appeal to such a project. Hallmark confirmed only that Jaguar would do something “special” at the event. Although high-performance models have long been a part of Jaguar’s heritage, the company is believed to have firmed up a definitive business case for pushing even further with the new GT brand. Developing low-volume halo models allows Jaguar to push its credentials as a manufacturer of sporting

premium cars harder, and higher price points give the company room to develop its product range. Jaguar’s plans to enter the hypercar field with the C-X75 were abandoned earlier this year, and although it hasn’t ruled out returning to that sector, Hallmark describes projects based on existing cars as “much more marketable in the short term”. Cars bearing the GT badge will be developed by Jaguar Land Rover’s Engineered To Order (ETO) division. ETO is set to take on a bigger role in the company as it expands to develop more bespoke styling and performance projects for Jaguar and Land Rover. Pete Simkin, director of ETO, said “We judge each project on its merits, but we hope the XK GT is just the start. We would definitely look at the business case for an F-type GT. The ETO division is about extending customer choice by offering a bespoke package. That

might mean developing lowrun option packs or doing one-offs. “Many customers are demanding more in terms of individuality and exclusivity, and we are well placed to deliver that. Our performance heritage is well known, and we have designers within the division who are there to work on customer-led projects. Our role is to consider anything that stays within the values of the brands we represent.” As well as an F-type GT, Jaguar is expected to develop more moderate (but still hard-edged) versions of the F-type. Insiders have confirmed that sporting Jaguars will henceforth be developed under the R, R-S and GT brands. R models will be sporting versions of mainstream cars, R-S versions more extreme performance models and GT cars limitedrun, track-focused specials. Although the higher-performance F-type models are likely to be the most eagerly anticipated, it is not certain that the sports car will be the next model to get the GT treatment. Instead, an XFRS GT is thought to be likely.

Friday, April 19, 2013

DVLA raises £10 million selling drivers details

The names and addresses of drivers were sold to third party organisations at a staggering rate of 50,000 a week – that’s 2.4 million a year. The details were then used to send out penalty notices to motorists caught, for example spending too long in a supermarket, shopping centre or even hospital car park. Many of these car parks use CCTV-based numberplate recognition systems which automatically capture the plate of any car overstaying its welcome. The details can then be used to obtain the details of the car’s registered keeper. The DVLA is being criticised for giving away the information too easily and profiting as a result. Graham Stringer, a Labour MP on the Commons Transport Select Committee, told the Daily Mail: “I do think some of the firms buying the DVLA’s information are crooks, and certainly in the past they have used violent and threatening behaviour, and I don’t think that is the right thing for the DVLA to be doing.

“Even when firms are approved there is no proper way of examining them. This is wrong and improper use of people’s private information.” Last year, more than 20 companies were banned from using the DVLA’s database for three months for breaching the rules on how the fines are issued. A common cause for complaint was inadequate signage with the car park. The biggest user of the DVLA’s database in 2012 was Parking Eye which spent just shy of £900,000 on the data. Next was Experian Aldermaston which spent nearly a quarter of a million pounds. The DVLA was quoted as saying: “Information is only provided under strict controls. If it is brought to our attention that a company does not meet necessary standards, we will investigate. “If allegations are proven we will stop the release of keeper information to them. “We do not make a profit on this service – the fee merely covers the cost of processing applications.”

Friday, April 19, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 9 represents G and 13 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Yearn for some blustery weather (4) 3 As the elite love to say first, it resists fire (8) 9 Alien to different foot part (7) 10 Make a speech about vermin in Olde English (5) 11 Attila the Hun’s secret machine (5) 12 Is sent damaged mugs (6) 14 Saints’ refined soils (6) 16 River with time becoming source of photos? (6) 19 Fast passage for others in shipping line (6) 21 Perfume from a romantic partner (5) 24 Absurd, in an elaborate way (5) 25 General change leads to an increase in size (7) 26 The rudiments of climatic conditions (8) 27 Customs of the American Middle-West (4)

Down 1 The smallest tiny way (8) 2 Exhausted swan found in the road (5) 4 Betting the Spanish silence is a sensation (6) 5 Runaway comes back in a bargepole (5) 6 Novice Peg has a shower inside (7) 7 Derive from stalk (4) 8 A teen’s new style fine fabric (6) 13 Agitator scares an opposition to the Crusades (8) 15 A fairer form of travel expense (7) 17 An Arab and the French make the land ready for farming (6) 18 Strong Post Office shelter (6) 20 Picture begins with Siamese cat eating newlaid eggs (5) 22 Being frightfully big, they make quite a bit of progress (5) 23 Evil drunk is beyond contempt (4)

STANDARD CLUES

Down

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words Aim Boy Bra Del Ebb Gee Lee Pry Ran Tan Tot Woo 4 letter words Aloe Anon Aria

Ball Belt Clot Crop Else Flee Fogs Gate Gout Idea Idol Inns Item Loan Loin Loss News Nowt Opal

Oval Owls Poop Scud Swag Ugly Wore Yeti 5 letter words Acres Again Arose Atoll Basso Beano Cairn Canoe Ceres

Elves Enemy Heels Iotas Macaw Marge Metre Molar Plots Recto Route Saris Tense 6 letter words Agenda Arched Awning Classy

Lastly Length Occupy Tattoo 7 letter words Concise Nosebag 8 letter words Barnacle Emergent 9 letter words Saturnine Spaghetti

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across

Across 1 Exceed (7) 5 Shatter (5) 8 Stupid (7) 9 Decorate (5) 10 Obsession (5) 11 Disclose (7) 12 Strike against (6) 14 Weigh up (6) 17 Filth (7) 19 Let (5) 22 Join (5) 23 Defraud (7) 24 Register (5) 25 Propose (7)

Down 1 Multitude (5) 2 Time in power (5) 3 Disturb (7) 4 Verbal communication (6) 5 Blemish (5) 6 Worry (7) 7 Obstructs (7) 12 Bearing (7) 13 Dispatch rider (7) 15 Slight variation of colour (7) 16 Emergency (6) 18 Faithful (5) 20 Gatehouse (5) 21 Cereal (5)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Flotsam, 5 Gecko, 8 Eternal, 9 Ounce, 10 Drake, 11 Confess, 12 Sacred, 14 Adhere, 17 Veranda, 19 Scant, 22 React, 23 Agitate, 24 Lolly, 25 Suspend. Down: 1 Field, 2 Opera, 3 Sincere, 4 Malice, 5 Groan, 6 Concede, 7 Oversee, 12 Several, 13 Curtail, 15 Dismiss, 16 Harass, 18 Natty, 20 Amaze, 21 Trend.

Scribble Pad

1 Least large (8) 2 Totally tired (5) 1 Craving (4) 4 Dash liquid over (6) 3 Fibrous amphibole (8) 5 Run away secretly (5) 9 Foot part (7) 6 Novice (7) 10 Talk pompously (5) 7 Stalk (4) 11 Shaping machine (5) 8 Cotton fabric (6) 12 Beer mugs (6) 13 Ancient nomadic 14 Blemishes (6) desert people (8) 16 Picture taker (6) 15 Flight cost (7) 19 Very fast (6) 17 Fit for cultivation (6) 21 Odour (5) 18 Effective (6) 24 Senseless (5) 20 Setting (5) 25 Make bigger (7) 22 Monstrous giants (5) 26 Components (8) 23 Morally reprehensible 27 Employs (4) (4) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Must, 3 Cascades, 9 Idolise, 10 Night, 11 Sprig, 12 Glades, 14 Ambles, 16 Hawser, 19 Prague, 21 Rooms, 24 Idaho, 25 Sea-lion, 26 Sing Sing, 27 Brae. Down: 1 Mainstay, 2 Spoor, 4 Avenge, 5 Conga, 6 Digress, 7 Sate, 8 Single, 13 Presence, 15 Bargain, 17 Abroad, 18 Reason, 20 Gross, 22 Osier, 23 Bias.

Across 1 Niece (7) 5 Huesos (5) 8 Remolque (de camión) (7) 9 Author (5) 10 Semillas (5) 11 Cojín (7) 12 To scratch (making sound) (6) 14 Liga (deporte) (6) 17 Closed (7) 19 Beach (5) 22 Smooth (hair) (5) 23 Trolley (supemarket) (7) 24 Hoja (de papel) (5) 25 Sixty (7)

Down 1 Mushrooms (5) 2 Freno (5) 3 Church (building) (7) 4 Holdup (robbery) (6) 5 Latón (metal) (5) 6 Nada (7) 7 Raro (extraño) (7) 12 Racistas (7) 13 Apellido (7) 15 Imperios (7) 16 Voces (sonidos humanos) (6) 18 Agente (representante) (5) 20 Aeroplane (5) 21 Now (at this time, immediately) (5)

Friday, April 19, 2013 Across 1 What name for ‘favouritism shown to relatives or friends, especially by giving them jobs’, comes from the Italian for ‘nephew’? (8) 5 See 3 Down 9 Which Chinese-style dish consists of fried noodles with shredded meat or seafood and vegetables? (4,4) 10 In astronomy, what is the name of the northern constellation that is said to represent the twins Castor and Pollux? (6) 12 Which chronic obstructive pulmonary disease is often caused by exposure to toxic chemicals, including long-term exposure to tobacco smoke? (9) 13 What is the name of the large trunk artery that carries blood from the left ventricle of the heart to branch arteries? (5) 14 In the children’s television series Bob the Builder, what is the name of the mischievous scarecrow, voiced by actor Rob Rackstraw? (4) 16 Which word can mean both ‘an abraded area where the skin is torn or worn off’ or ‘to produce a distinctive sound on a turntable, by moving a vinyl record back and forth while

manipulating the crossfader’? (7) 19 Which small wind instrument with holes for the fingers typically has the shape of a bird? (7) 21 What is the name of the strong-smelling substance secreted by a certain type of male deer, which used as an ingredient in perfumery? (4) 24 In UK bars and pubs, what is the name of the device that is fastened to the neck of an inverted bottle for measuring out spirits? (5) 25 Derived from the French for ‘relate’, what name is often applied to ‘a skilful teller of anecdotes’? (9) 27 In Walt Disney’s 1937 full length animated feature film Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, which of the seven has the longest beard? (6) 28 Paul Daniels, Ali Bongo, Geoffrey Durham, John Nevil Maskelyne, Fay Presto and Robert Harbin are/were all examples of which type of stage performer? (8) 29 Which word can precede: back, bag, blanket, soap, sore and stitch? (6) 30 Which expression is often used to describe someone who

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

is utterly lazy? (4-4)

Down 1 What nickname is commonly used in the US for their five-

cent coin? (6) 2 Which word can mean ‘to supply a forgotten word or line to an actor’ or ‘done or acting without delay’? (6)

3/5 Thomas Willam Hicks is the real name of which singer who is widely regarded as Britain’s first teen idol and rock ‘n’ roll star? (5,6) 4 What name for ‘a fixed regular sum paid as a salary or as expenses to a clergyman, teacher, or public official’ is derived from the Latin for ‘wages’ and ‘to pay’? (7) 6 What type of publication, usually in the form of a book, provides synonyms, and sometimes antonyms, for the words of a given language? (9) 7 Which verb means ‘to leave one’s country of residence for a new one’? (8) 8 What general name is given to inscriptions on a gravestone? (8) 11 Which American rock group’s two British top 10 hit singles were My Best Friend’s Girl (1978) and Drive (1984)? (4) 15 What is the surname of the American actress who is best known for her role as Larry Hagman’s sister-in-law and Patrick Duffy’s wife, Pamela Barnes Ewing, in the long-running television series Dallas? (9) 17 Which of the Seven

Wonders of the Ancient World erected on the Greek island of Rhodes by Chares of Lindos between 292 and 280 BC, was a 30 metre (107 ft) high statue of the Greek god Helios? (8) 18 What word is often used to mean the name of a newspaper or magazine printed at the top of the first or editorial page? (8) 20 Which unit of area is equal to 4,840 square yards? (4) 21 What is the name of the model construction kit comprising re-usable metal strips, plates, angle girders, wheels, axles and gears, with nuts and bolts to connect the pieces, which was invented in 1901 in England by Frank Hornby? (7) 22 In Australian Rules football, the goal umpire signals what type of score by pointing one finger, and waving one flag? (6) 23 In sporting events such as the Olympic Games, medals made of what metal are given to the competitor(s) coming third? (6) 26 Which adjective meaning ‘marked by or showing unaffected simplicity and lack of guile or worldly experience’ comes from the Latin for ‘native’ or ‘natural’? (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH LA TECNOLOGÍA- TECHNOLOGY Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

general QUIZ

ANSWERS: 1. Dwight Yorke 2. Motown 3. On A Compact Disc 4. 181 5. Bloomfield Road 6. Wireworm 7. Jamaica 8. The Deer Hunter 9. Muhammad Ali 10. Prince William

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 8 Bodice, 9 Sty, 10 Ides, 11 Polyhedron, 12 Alum, 13 Despot, 16 Nitrogen, 17 Adjourn, 18 Manacle, 22/4 Puppet On A String, 25 Avatar, 26 Biro, 27 Sandie Shaw, 30 Peru, 31 A-Ha, 32 Lean-to. Down: 1 Dodo, 2 Tidy, 3 Semester, 5 Cygnet, 6 Pina colada, 7 De luxe, 14 End, 15 Phosphorus, 19 Amarillo, 20 Lea, 21 Ananias, 23 UNICEF, 24 Tasman, 28 Slag, 29 Alto.

encender

audifonos

enchufe

auricular

latapa

cargador

ordenador

cuenta

paginaweb

desbloquear

pantalla

descargar

pulsar

elbuzon

tarjetasim

elsonido

teclas

Empareja estas palabras - Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.apagar, 2.audifonos,

15.pantalla, 16.pulsar,

off, k.web page, l.press, m.keys,

3.auricular, 4.cargador,

17.tarjeta sim, 18.teclas

n.charger, o.the inbox,

5.cuenta, 6.desbloquear,

p.the plug, q.computer,

7.descargar, 8.el buzon,

a.the cover, b.to unblock,

9.el sonido, 10.encender,

c.ear-phone, d.ear-phone,

11.enchufe, 12.la tapa,

e.account, f.screen, g.sim card,

13.ordenador, 14.pagina web,

h.download, i.the sound, j.switch

Soduko

Span - Eng

Quizword

r.switch on. Answers: 1j, 2c, 3d, 4n, 5e, 6b, 7h, 8o, 9i, 10r, 11p, 12a, 13q, 14k, 15f, 16l, 17g, 18m.

1. Who In The World Of Sport Is The Father Of Jordan's First Son "Harvey"? 2. Which Record Label Got Its Name Because It Was Based In Detroit An Important Centre Of The Car Industry? 3. Where would you expect to find a Galvayne's Groove? Is It on a compact disk, in a horses tooth or in an Arthurian legend 4. How Many Weeks Did Abba Spend In The UK Charts In The 70's (106, 140, 181, 241)? 5. What Is The Name Of Blackpool Football Club's Home Ground? 6. What is the larva of the click beetle called? 7. On which Caribbean Island is the resort of Montego Bay? 8. Which Film Directed by Michael Cimino & Starring Robert De Niro Won The Best Picture Oscar In 1978? 9. Which Boxer Was Nicknamed "The Louisville Lip"? 10. Who Is Presently The President Of The Football Association?

apagar

Fill It In

Friday, April 19, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY with ALEX TRELINSKI

BRILLIANT BGT DOES HAVE THE X FACTOR

Ice Warriors, or rather one Ice Warrior with some very THE very welcome return nasty looking teeth! This was of Britain’s Got Talent to vintage Who and a much ITV delivered some of the needed kick up the provermost entertaining TV I’ve bial for a series that had lost seen this year. My tear its mojo, despite the very ducts were working away good partnership of the last Saturday watching Doctor and Clara. some of the excellent acts, There’s some great and the whole product was news for fans of expertly packaged in a Benidorm. The sixth series is really enjoyable 90 mincurrently in production, and utes. ITV have wasted no time in The Hungarian shadow ordering a seventh run, which is no surprise with the theatre got me all emotional big viewing figures. The as did the 11 year old singer, shooting schedule also left and the modest lady who did the actress Siobhan a fantastic version of My Finneran with an interesting Funny Valentine; and not fordilemma as it clashed with getting the funny young equivalent X Factor ratings stuff! playing O’Brien on Downton teenage comedian with cere- out of sight, and that was in After two dud Abbey, which Siobhan said bral palsy. spite of a healthy rating for episodes of Dr. Who, she didn’t love playing any The show has everything what was an excellent edition thank heavens for the writing more. So she chose to stay that seems to have disap- of The Voice over on BBC1. talent of Mark Gatiss, who as Janice Garvey instead, peared in recent years from Everything was right on The X Factor, which treats BGT, including Ant & Dec, delivered the goods last and I hope for her sake that itself far too seriously. That and a fun judging panel, with Saturday with an exciting the script quality will be more was reflected in the viewing the Cowell/Walliams bro- submarine episode featuring consistent, which was what figures which smashed the mance in full flow. Wonderful the long awaited return of the let the last series down at

times. Apparently, the creator of the show, Derren Litten, has written the whole of series six, which fingers crossed will be better than his recent mediocre effort for Sky Living, The Spa. So who did murder Danny Latimer? The final episode of ITV’s brilliant Broadchurch airs this Monday, and we are promised a big shock. This drama has easily passed my test of excellence which is to let out a groan of disappointment once the closing credits start running, in the knowledge that the hour has quickly flown by. We’ve seen zillions of red herrings thrown at us over the identity of the killer, but I’m going to foolishly pick the young journalist, Olly Stevens, from the local rag, purely because he hasn‘t featured as a suspect! BBC Four had a nice tribute to the “thinking

man’s crumpet” on Sunday night. That phrase was created by that great wit and comedy writer, Frank Muir to describe Joan Bakewell, who seemed to be the only primetime female presenter of substance back in the sexist days of the sixties. She looks great at 80 and full of fun (as we also saw recently on Have I Got News For You). I was concerned though about her interviewer, Sir David Frost, who though six years younger, appeared to be in the first stages of rigor mortis! And staying on BBC Four, do try and watch Danny Baker’s hilarious new series called Brushing Up On. The first programme had Danny raiding the BBC archives for all kinds of clips to do with tunnels, and was the perfect example of a funny script and some great links. Even if you’ve not been a fan of Baker, I’d warmly recommend you to check this out.

The Courier Friday TV 00:35 This Week 01:20 Holiday Weatherview 01:25 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Crime Scene Rescue 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 Perfection 16:45 Chefs: Put Your Menu Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 BBC London News 19:55 Party Election Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 20:30 A Question of Sport 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 MasterChef 22:00 Have I Got News for You 22:30 Not Going Out 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Graham Norton Show

00:20 Fit to Rule: How Royal Illness Changed History 01:20 Panorama

01:50 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools - Orbit: Earth's Extraordinary Journey 06:00 Schools: Your Paintings 06:25 Schools: Your Paintings 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:45 Crime Scene Rescue 09:15 The A to Z of TV Gardening 10:00 Antiques Roadshow 11:00 Question Time 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Gymnastics 17:30 Coast 18:10 Flog It! 18:55 Party Election Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Helicopter Heroes 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 Nature's Microworlds 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 The Genius of Josiah Wedgwood 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 The Last Word 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 River Monsters 04:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Rory Bremner's Great British Views 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:25 Party Election Broadcast 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 The Martin Lewis Money Show 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 The Ice Cream Girls 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Forgetting Sarah Marshall

THE ICE CREAM GIRLS New series. Two women who were accused of murdering their schoolteacher in the summer of 1995 are forced to confront their dark, shared history when one of them is released from prison almost two decades later, having always protested her innocence. Returning to her home town, Poppy decides to track down old friend Serena and get her to admit the truth about what really happened that fateful night.

00:05 24 Hours in A&E 01:10 Random Acts 01:15 The Hoarder Next Door 02:10 Born to Be Different 03:05 Our Daughter, the Mermaid 04:05 Syria: Across the Lines Channel 4 Dispatches 05:00 Unreported World 05:25 Deal or No Deal 06:20 Countdown 07:05 River Cottage Bites 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:35 What's Cooking? 14:45 SuperScrimpers' Challenge 15:45 Countdown 16:30 The Common Denominator 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 Unreported World 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 My Big Fat Gypsy Fortune 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

April 19

01:10 SuperCasino 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olive the Ostrich 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Trisha 13:00 Looney Tunes 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 The Removal Men 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:15 Shadow on the Mesa 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Nature Shock 21:00 Ice Road Truckers 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

The Courier Saturday TV

April 20

00:25 The Matt Lucas Awards

00:00 Weather

00:55 Butterfly on a Wheel

00:05 Later with Jools Holland

02:20 Weatherview

01:10 The Singing Detective 02:55 Question Time

02:25 BBC News

03:55 This Is BBC Two

07:00 Breakfast

07:00 This Is BBC Two

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live

07:45 On the Beat

12:30 Nigel Slater's Simple

09:30 A Stitch in Time 11:00 Snooker: The World

Suppers

Championship

13:00 BBC News; Regional News

13:25 EastEnders

and Weather

15:15 Snooker: The World

13:15 Football Focus

Championship

14:00 Snooker: The World

18:30 The Great British Sewing Bee 19:30 Flog It!

Championship

20:00 Snooker: The World

15:15 Live Challenge Cup Rugby

Championship

League

21:00 Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em 21:30 The Many Faces of

17:30 Final Score

22:30 QI XL

18:10 Formula One

23:15 America in Primetime

19:25 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:45 Doctor Who 20:30 The National Lottery: Who Dares Wins 21:20 The Voice UK

01:35 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: a Deadly State of Mind 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Jungle Junction 07:25 The Hive 07:45 Dino Dan 08:05 Canimals 08:25 Almost Naked Animals 08:35 Ultimate Spider-Man 09:00 Jessie 09:25 ITV News 09:30 Saturday Farm 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 11:20 My Tasty Travels with Lynda Bellingham 12:20 Murder, She Wrote 13:20 ITV News and Weather 13:29 ITV Meridian Weather 13:30 Midsomer Murders 15:25 The Chase 16:30 Kindergarten Cop 18:30 ITV News Meridian 18:30 ITV Meridian Weather 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 You've Been Framed! 20:00 Britain's Got Talent 21:30 The Cube 22:30 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 Parenthood

00:05 01:05 01:10 02:00 02:20 02:45 03:05 03:25 04:15 05:10 06:05 06:50 07:15 07:40 08:05 08:55 10:00 11:00 12:00 12:35 13:00 13:35 14:40 17:15 17:50 18:20 18:55 19:25 19:55 20:20 21:15 22:20

Rude Tube Random Acts New Girl The Mindy Project The Mindy Project Happy Endings Accidentally on Purpose St Elsewhere Come Dine with Me Deal or No Deal Countdown Ginetta Challenge The Grid World Superbikes Athletics The Morning Line Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Simpsons The Secret Millionaire Channel 4 Racing Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Come Dine with Me Channel 4 News Grand Designs Walking Through History New Moon

ROCKY IV Boxing drama starring Sylvester Stallone. The now legendary heavyweight champion of the world, Rocky Balboa, is challenged by crack Russian fighter Ivan Drago. But first, Drago has to prove himself against Rocky's friend and former archrival Apollo Creed.

22:20 Casualty 23:10 BBC News; Weather 23:30 National Lottery Update

00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:30 The Mr Men Show 07:45 Chloe's Closet 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:15 Animal Antics 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:35 City of Friends 08:50 Little Princess 09:05 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers: Super Samurai 11:35 Batman: The Brave and the Bold 12:00 Inside Hollywood 12:05 The Removal Men 13:05 Nature Shock 14:05 Robson's Extreme Fishing Challenge 15:05 Cheaper by the Dozen 17:00 Apache 18:45 5 News Weekend 18:50 Cahill, United States Marshal 20:40 Rocky IV 22:30 Boxing

The Courier Sunday TV 01:00 The Football League Show 02:20 Black Eagle 03:55 Weatherview 04:00 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 08:00 Match of the Day 09:30 London Marathon 15:00 Sunday Politics 16:20 Points of View 16:35 Lifeline 16:45 Escape to the Country 17:15 Songs of Praise 18:00 Formula One 19:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 The Village 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2 00:15 Richard Briers: A Tribute

02:00 04:00 Championship 04:50 02:05 Snooker: World Championships 07:00 07:25 Extra 07:45 04:05 This Is BBC Two 08:05 08:20 07:20 The Outlaw 08:30 09:15 Gardeners' World 09:00 09:45 The A to Z of TV Gardening 09:25 09:30 10:30 The Beechgrove Garden 10:25 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 11:20 12:30 Paul Hollywood's Bread 12:20 13:00 Flog It! 12:24 12:25 14:00 Gymnastics 13:55 15:30 Snooker: The World 14:25 Championship 15:55 16:55 19:00 Coast 19:15 20:00 London Marathon Highlights 19:15 21:00 Bill Bailey's Jungle Hero 19:30 19:45 22:00 Toughest Place to Be 20:30 23:00 Mock the Week 21:00 23:00 23:30 It's Kevin 01:15 Snooker: The World

Jackpot247 Ladette to Lady: Australia ITV Nightscreen Jungle Junction The Hive Dino Dan Canimals Almost Naked Animals Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Sonny with a Chance ITV News Country House Sunday The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Dickinson's Real Deal ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Columbo: Mind over Mayhem You've Been Framed! Britain's Got Talent Food Glorious Food Jurassic Park ITV Meridian Weather ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Catchphrase Off Their Rockers Endeavour Perspectives

THE KARATE KID Premiere. An American youngster goes to live in China with his mother, where he becomes an outsider and falls foul of the local bullies. He receives help from the kindly school janitor, who turns out to be a kung fu master and offers to train the boy to defend himself. Martial arts drama, with Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan.

00:45 Derren Brown Investigates: The Ghost Hunter 01:50 Double Jeopardy 03:35 Hollyoaks 05:35 Deal or No Deal 06:30 Countdown 07:15 The Hoobs 07:40 The Hoobs 08:05 Freesports on 4 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 09:55 Frasier 10:30 Sunday Brunch 13:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:25 The Big Bang Theory 13:55 The Big Bang Theory 14:20 The Simpsons 14:50 The Simpsons 15:20 Meet Dave 17:05 Deal or No Deal 18:05 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:05 Channel 4 News 19:30 Come Dine with Me 20:30 The Karate Kid 23:15 Max Payne

April 21

00:00 Law & Order 00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:05 SuperCasino 04:50 Wildlife SOS 05:40 County Secrets 05:55 Hana's Helpline 06:05 Angels of Jarm 06:15 Roary the Racing Car 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:35 Hana's Helpline 06:50 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:30 The Mr Men Show 07:45 Chloe's Closet 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:15 Animal Antics 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:35 Mio Mao 08:40 City of Friends 08:50 Milkshake! Monkey 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:20 Milkshake! Show Songs 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:30 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 11:05 Power Rangers 11:40 Batman 12:10 Inside Hollywood 12:15 Trauma Doctors 13:15 Cowboy Builders 14:15 Rolf's Animal Clinic 15:20 It Could Happen to You 17:15 Little Women 19:30 5 News Weekend 19:35 The Fifth Element 22:00 Once Upon a Time 23:00 Person of Interest 23:55 Blood Work

The Courier Monday TV

April 22

00:25 Late Kick Off 00:55 The Getaway 02:45 Weatherview 02:50 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Crime Scene Rescue 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 Perfection 16:45 Chefs: Put Your Menu Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:55 Party Election Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Bang Goes the Theory 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 The Prisoners 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Have I Got a Bit More News for You

00:00 Snooker: The World Championship

00:50 Snooker: World Championships Extra 02:50 Holby City 03:50 This Is BBC Two 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:45 Crime Scene Rescue 09:15 Saints and Scroungers 10:00 Great British Menu 10:30 Great British Railway Journeys 11:00 Snooker: The World Championship 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Snooker: The World Championship 18:55 Party Election Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Paul Hollywood's Bread 22:00 Fit to Rule: How Royal Illness Changed History 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Newsnight

00:00 ITV News and Weather 00:14 ITV Meridian Weather 00:15 Premiership Rugby Union 01:15 The Store 03:15 British Superbike Championship Highlights 04:10 Monk 04:55 Monk 05:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 Rory Bremner's Great British Views 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:25 Party Election Broadcast 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 James Nesbitt's Ireland 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Broadchurch 23:05 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 The Unforgettable

01:10 Enemy at the Gates 03:25 Tumult 03:40 Inside Nature's Giants 04:35 Come Dine with Me 05:30 Deal or No Deal 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:35 What's Cooking? 14:45 SuperScrimpers' Challenge 15:45 Countdown 16:30 1001 Things You Should Know 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Dispatches 21:30 SuperScrimpers 22:00 The Hoarder Next Door 23:00 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA

BEN FOGLE: NEW LIVES IN THE WILD Ben Fogle meets people who have moved to inhospitable parts of the world after leaving the rat race behind. He begins by travelling to Restoration Island in Australia's Great Barrier Reef to visit former businessman David Glasheen, who lost $10million in the stock market crash of 1987 - as well as his marriage and his home. David is the sole inhabitant of the volcanic island, living in a house made of recycled material.

02:05 SuperCasino 04:55 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Wildlife SOS 05:45 County Secrets 05:55 Hana's Helpline 06:10 Angels of Jarm 06:15 Roary the Racing Car 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:35 Hana's Helpline 06:50 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olive the Ostrich 07:55 Little Princess 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 08:55 Milkshake! Monkey 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Trisha 13:00 Looney Tunes 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Trauma Doctors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Carolina Moon 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 The True Story 21:00 Nature Shock 22:00 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 23:00 Battle Scarred

The Courier Tuesday TV

April 23

00:20 The Graham Norton Show 01:05 Gladiatress 02:30 Weatherview 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Crime Scene Rescue 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 Perfection 16:45 Chefs: Put Your Menu Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:55 Party Election Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 The Syndicate 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Wright Way

00:20 Snooker: The World Championship 01:10 Snooker: World Championships Extra 03:10 Keeping Britain Alive: The NHS in a Day 04:10 This Is BBC Two

05:00 Schools: Music, Mud and Making Money 05:30 Made of Money 06:00 What Makes Me, Me 06:05 What Makes Me, Me 06:10 What Makes Me, Me 06:15 Vikings 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:45 Crime Scene Rescue 09:15 Saints and Scroungers 10:00 Great British Menu 10:30 Great British Railway Journeys 11:00 Snooker: The World Championship 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Snooker: The World Championship 18:55 Party Election Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 The Great British Sewing Bee 22:00 Keeping Britain Alive: The NHS in a Day 23:00 Later Live - with Jools Holland 23:30 Newsnight

00:20 Monk 01:10 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Rory Bremner's Great British Views 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:25 Party Election Broadcast 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:40 Pensioners Behind Bars

THE WRIGHT WAY Comedy, written by Ben Elton, starring David Haig as an exasperated health-and-safety manager who has a tendency to bring his work home with him. Gerald's daughter tries to encourage him to get back on the dating scene, so he decides to buy his colleague Malika a nice present for her upcoming birthday. But the woman in the shop he visits is far from helpful. Joanne Matthews, Beattie Edmondson and Mina Anwar co-star.

00:05 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 01:05 Random Acts 01:10 Shameless 02:05 Black Mirror 03:00 Gok's Clothes Roadshow 03:55 The Renovation Game 04:50 Come Dine with Me 05:45 Deal or No Deal 06:40 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:35 What's Cooking? 14:45 SuperScrimpers' Challenge 15:45 Countdown 16:30 1001 Things You Should Know 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 Embarrassing Bodies: Live from the Clinic 22:00 Edward VIII's Murderous Mistress 23:00 Shameless

00:00 Pistol Whipped 02:00 SuperCasino 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olive the Ostrich 07:55 Little Princess 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 08:55 Mio Mao 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Trisha 13:00 Looney Tunes 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Cowboy Builders 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Sacrifices of the Heart 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Extraordinary People: Britain's Tiniest Toddlers 21:00 Big Body Squad 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 Body of Proof 23:55 Dallas

The Courier Wednesday TV

April 24

00:05 Air Force One 02:05 Weatherview 02:10 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Crime Scene Rescue 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 Perfection 16:45 Chefs: Put Your Menu Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 19:55 Party Election Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 21:00 MasterChef 22:00 Great Bear Stakeout 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport

Stage 3 05:55 Schools - Little Stargazing 06:25 Schools - William Whiskerson: Canal 06:35 Schools - William Whiskerson: Forest 06:45 Schools - William Whiskerson: Bee Farm 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:45 Crime Scene Rescue 09:15 Saints and Scroungers 10:00 Great British Menu 10:30 See Hear 11:00 Snooker: The World Championship 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Lifeline 14:10 Snooker: The World Championship 18:55 Party Election Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 Coast 22:00 This World 23:00 James May's Things You Need to Know 23:30 Newsnight

00:40 01:30 04:00 04:50 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 Views 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:25 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:35

In Plain Sight Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Rory Bremner's Great British Dickinson's Real Deal ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Chase ITV News Meridian Party Election Broadcast ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Food Glorious Food Scott & Bailey ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV Meridian Weather Sports Life Stories

00:10 8 Out of 10 Cats 01:15 European Poker Tour 02:10 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:35 Sailing 03:00 Freesports on 4 03:30 Ginetta Challenge 03:55 The Grid 04:20 World Superbikes 04:45 Athletics 05:45 Dispatches 06:15 Deal or No Deal 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:35 What's Cooking? 14:45 SuperScrimpers 15:45 Countdown 16:30 1001 Things You Should Know 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Phil Spencer: Secret Agent 22:00 24 Hours in A&E 23:00 10 O'Clock Live 23:55 Random Acts

10â&#x20AC;&#x2122;OCLOCK LIVE 00:20 Snooker: The World Championship 01:10 Snooker: World Championships Extra 03:10 The Railway: Keeping Britain on Track 04:10 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Pompeii: The Mystery of the People Frozen in Time 05:30 Schools - Eco Maths: Key

The return of the satirical current affairs show, with David Mitchell, Jimmy Carr, Charlie Brooker and Lauren Laverne. They are joined by guests from the worlds of politics, science and culture for debates, interviews, topical comedy, investigations and opinion pieces.

00:55 CSI: NY 01:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 SuperCasino 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olive the Ostrich 07:55 Little Princess 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 08:55 Mio Mao 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Trisha 13:00 Looney Tunes 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ben Fogle: New Lives in the Wild 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Mystery Woman: Vision of a Murder 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Rolf's Animal Clinic 21:00 Emergency Bikers 22:00 NCIS 23:00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 23:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

The Courier Thursday TV

April 25

00:05 Munich 02:40 Weatherview 02:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 12:45 Crime Scene Rescue 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 Perfection 16:45 Chefs: Put Your Menu Where Your Mouth Is 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 19:55 Party Election Broadcast 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 MasterChef 22:00 Great Bear Stakeout 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Question Time

00:20 Snooker: The World Championship 01:10 Snooker: World Championships Extra 03:10 See Hear 03:40 This Is BBC Two 04:50 Growing Up Poor

05:30 Schools: Children at Work Cocoa 06:00 Schools - Counting with Rodd 2 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:50 Crime Scene Rescue 09:20 Saints and Scroungers 10:05 Great British Menu 10:35 Great British Menu 11:05 Great British Railway Journeys 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Snooker: The World Championship 18:55 Party Election Broadcast 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 James May's Man Lab 22:00 The Politician's Husband 23:00 Watson & Oliver 23:30 Newsnight 23:30 Weather

00:35 The Dales 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Rory Bremner's Great British Views 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:10 Party Election Broadcast 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:45 Emmerdale 20:45 Live UEFA Europa League Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV News Meridian 23:45 UEFA Europa League Highlights

WATSON & OLIVER New series. The return of the sketch show written by and starring comedy duo Lorna Watson and Ingrid Oliver. A realistic cookery programme shows viewers how to bin their burnt meals and order takeaways, two police officers get overly musical, a prime minister comes up with the ultimate excuse to duck out of a boring dinner, and there are wall-to-wall cakes and cockney mums in a parody of Call the Midwife.

00:00 16 Kids and Counting 01:00 The Sex Clinic 01:55 Revenge 02:40 Margot at the Wedding 04:10 Come Dine with Me 05:05 Deal or No Deal 06:00 Countdown 06:45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss Australia 12:00 Location, Location, Location 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Come Dine with Me 13:35 What's Cooking? 14:45 SuperScrimpers 15:45 Countdown 16:30 1001 Things You Should Know 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Five Minutes to a Fortune 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Secret Eaters 22:00 The Intern 23:00 The Sex Clinic

00:55 Poker 01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olive the Ostrich 07:55 Little Princess 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Trisha 13:00 Looney Tunes 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Big Body Squad 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Beyond the Blackboard 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 The Hotel Inspector 21:00 Cowboy Builders 22:00 Trauma Doctors 23:00 The Specialist

Friday, April 19, 2013

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more. We cater for companies and self-employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

AUCTIONS

ANIMALS Pet Travel UK Personalised family pet transporter between Spain/France/UK. Door to door fully accompanied service. Travel overland then on ferries with your pets. No charge for passengers. Pet friendly hotels used if a stop required, All air conditioned vehicles (no vans), DEFRA licence. www.pettraveluk. co.uk UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644

AUTO ELECTRICIAN

BABY EQUPMENT HIRE TIPTOP BABY HOLIDAY CARE, travel cots, highchairs, car and booster seats. Buggies. Beach Towels. Free local delivery. www.tiptopvillacare.co.uk. E-mail linda@tiptopvillacare.co.uk Telephone 968566011 Mobile 667848582

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276. Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer. Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian. CommunityChurch@gmail.c om or contact Reverend

Eddie on 966769300 or 650509606. Reg No:2009SG/A Good Friday Service at 11 am. at the Church Easter Sunday 11 am. will include a Drama message, please join us The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

CARS FOR SALE

53.000 miles. 2 lady owners. Immaculate condition. trial welcome. 4,950€ 966 796 788 La Marina San Fulgencio.(113) Looking for a car We have a good selection of LHD & RHD vehicles FOR SALE OR EXCHANGE Quality cars bought for cash Tel 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com (114) Ford focus 1.6 tdci 2005 1 owner, 77,OOO kms, fsh, A/C, CD, lovely condition, light metallic blue, 6750 euro Tel 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars .com (114)

INSURANCE

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully comprehensive policies at the price of third party! Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963 Peugeot 206 cabriolet 2006. RHD Spanish reg. Black. Peugeot service history.

CASER SEGUROS - for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral. Policies available in English and German. Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

OVERSEAS PROPERTY Need a UK base, 2 bed brick built bungalow in Kent for sale. Full c/h. long lease, for more details phone 965696113, e-mail, ronelliott1@hotmail.co.uk £20,000 (115)

PROPERTY FOR RENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apartments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry system. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 636615716. (116) Ref: 61, A lovely two bedroomed ground floor apartment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swimming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking distance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 49, 2nd floor one bedroom apartment situated conveniently located in the town centre of Torrevieja, with a small sun balcony overlooking the lovely communal pool. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spacious 2 bedroom apartment,

located in Torre la Mata. Close to all amenities and beach. 3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apartment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restaurants and bars. Short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, located near los Locos beach, beautifully furnished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

CAR BREAKERS

CATERING

CARPENTER

AIRPORT COLLECTION

ALARMS

CAR HIRE

CLEANERS

Friday, April 19, 2013 El Chaparel/La Siesta Two bedroom apartment in a quiet gated urbanisation for rent €350 per month plus bills. Reference No 17 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS LONG TERM LET TORREVIEJA – 2 bed, park home, aircon, TV, DVD, communal pool and bar. Near Torretta II shops and bars. Close to beach. 250pm + bills. 617 599 470 (113) Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. KBJ3 – Luxury duplex penthouse apartment located near the marina in Guardamar. 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, amazing panoramic views, inc.parking and storage. 500 € pcm. 966 923 963 Ref. CBR21 – A rare chance to rent a frontline beach apartment in Torrevieja! Ground floor with large terrace, 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, direct and full-on sea views. 500 € pcm. 966 923 963 CBR27 – Ground floor apartment in closed luxury residential with beautiful communal gardens, pool, 2 beds 1 walk-in shower, redecorated this year. Only 250m walk to beach, inc.parking. 400€ pcm, call 966 923 963 CBR28 – Town centre apartment in Los Montesinos, all amenities nearby, spacious 3 beds 2 baths, no lift. 250 € pcm, call 966 923 963 Ref. CBR3 – 2 bedroom 2 bathroom townhouse located in Algorfa, communal pool, fully furnished, 300 € pcm. 966 923 963 Ref. RS20 – 2 bedroom 1 bathroom apartment within private enclosed residential in San Luis, large terrace, 300 € pcm. 966 923 963 CBR18 – Detached Spanish villa, beachside Punta Prima, 4 bedrooms, garage, 1200 m2 plot, own pool, 900 € pcm. 966 923 963 CBR23 : Stylish new house in Los Montesinos, 3 bed 2 bath with large 65m2 garage, front and back terraces. 500 € pcm. 966 923 963 Ref. RS90 – 2 bedroom detached villa all on one level, fully furnished, as new! Located in El Raso (Guardamar) 400 €. pcm Tel. 966 923 963

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros - excellent prices for expats; policies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote. Torrevieja. Club with 4 bedrooms and bathrooms, large entrance, about 90 m², furnished. Also suitable for office or other commercial, close to Playa de los Locos. Price. €89,000 Phone 686935870 (118) Torrevieja. Well-established restaurant and bar for reasons of age for sale €119,000 Including inventory. 100 m², close to Playa de los Locos. Tel 686935870 (118) Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis. Great sea and lake views. 55.000 €. Tel. 966 923 963 Ref: 510, €70,000. Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking and faces large oasis communal pool. Walking distance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Rare opportunity to purchase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros. Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground parking, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views. Viewings absolutely essential. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool.

Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks projected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 communal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popular urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant. Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods. Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bedroom Townhouse located in the popular area of Punta Prima, the property has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bedrooms, one with balcony, bathroom with double shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005. Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge-Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg. Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons. Greenland Views and all local amenities close by. Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off-road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

Top floor Duplex. Very good price of 108.000 euros for a quick sale. Furnished to a very high standard, 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, Lounge Diner, Glazed in Porch, Large Roof Top Solarium. Choice of Communal Pools, Private Parking. Walking distance to all amenities and on the First urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant. Viewing essential. Ref No. K44. Tel. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interior furnishings are top quality, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and graveled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in shower units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51.

€245,000 Tel 680333242 Balsares is opposite Gran Alacant where the proposed golf course is now being started so this property will virtually be on the golf course, it is an investment not to be missed. The property is on a small gated urbanisation of 18 houses with private underground parking for 2 cars and direct access to the house, communal pool and toilets/changing rooms etc. The house is brand new and consists of 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, lounge with working fire place, large kitchen 12 m2, large galleria/ utility room, bedroom balcony and front tiled terrace. This property also has a converted under build for an extra lounge or bedroom. ref K52 €198,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant Opportunity to purchase a beautiful 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed,large kitchen, detached property with rooftop solarium. Well established gardens and drive way for 2 cars, whilst also overlooking the projected 18 hole golf course. Comprising of fitted wardrobes, utility room, air con H/C, alarm system, electric wall heaters, intercom system, fireplace, ceilings fans, 8x7 gazebo, use of 2 large communal pools, immaculate condition with many extras. ref K12. €180,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant bargain, detached villa with pool on 400m2 plot. Briefly comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, Lounge Diner, independent kitchen, solarium with views, well maintained gardens. Quiet location yet within walking distance of all amenities. Top quality furniture and appliances included in the price. Extras include, mosquito nets, grills, toldos blinds, built in wardrobes, gas fire, electric heating, ceiling fans, English & Spanish TV, tastefully tiled & graveled garden with irrigation system. ref K43. €229,000 Tel 680333242

Friday, April 19, 2013

Ref: KP3100, €183,000. Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool. Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbanization offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 double beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Large detached villa with beautiful gardens set on 550m2 plot, built in BBQ area and large 10x6 pool.Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner with fire place,

Independent Kitchen, air con H/C, Solarium, front porch, converted under build with 3 extra rooms, private covered parking, irrigated gardens, close distance to beach and amenities. Ref. K18 €250,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant beautiful detached villa with very large pool and within walking distance to the Gran Alacant Commercial Centre. This villa comprised of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, lounge-diner, Independent kitchen, roof top storage, solarium, porch & terrace. Large private pool, BBQ area, established gardens and private terraces, Private Parking, Solarium with Views to Alicante. 450m2 plot, fully furnished including white goods. Located in very quiet desirable road. ref.L96. €255,000 Tel

HANDY MAN

HEALTH

ELECTRICIAN

680333242 Gran Alacant Gem! Fabulous detached Villa, with Alicante sea views to the front and wood land views to the rear, means this immaculate villa is very private and un-overlooked. Comprising of 2 large bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 2 bath, large fully equipped kitchen,glazed porch sitting area, solarium, Attractive Pool with cover, well maintained Gardens. Central Heating, Air Con, Ceiling fans, Private Parking, Alarm system, Decorative working Fire Place complete with electric Fire. Outdoor workshop/storage area, Quality Pergola & BBQ. Constructed in 2006, on plot size of 380m2 and being sold fully furnished including white goods. ref L80. €234,995 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Rare investment!! corner south facing opportunity on Novamar urbanisation.This immaculate ground floor duplex has been kept and maintained to a very high standard inside and out the position is fantastic, enjoys views over the lovely oasis communal pool, surrounded by lawned gardens. Comprising of plot size 100m2 Build Size 90m2, 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, fully furnished, AntiGlare Windows, Security Door, Security Grills, Built-in Wardrobes, Extra Storage, Galleria, Electric Panel Heaters, Heated Towel Rails, Air Con (h&c), Ceiling. Fans. Thermo Shower, Vanity Units and decoratively tiled throughout, exquisite garden, Underground pri-

vate parking. Ref.K10 €139,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the central area of Gran Alacant and within walking distance to all local amenities such as a selection of different cuisine restaurants, bars, pharmacies, banks, popular GA market and Carabassi Beach. Comprises of 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms with a private garage and roof-top solarium. This property is part of a small urbanization which has the use of a large decorative communal pool. Ref. K36 €149,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more. 125.000 Euros Ref No. K23. Tel. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantastic communal pool situated in beautifully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportunity Tel 680333242

Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever constructed- Very large 5 bedrooms, 4 bathroom(2 ensuit) property, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge-diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room. Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation system and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished. Within walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref. K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbanization offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 double beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front

garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Ground floor south west facing apartment in Puerto Marino close to G.A commercial centre, comprising of 2 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Lounge-Diner, Independent Kitchen with Galleria, Porch area and large tiled front garden, The property is being sold fully furnished and includes all kitchen appliances, H & C Air con is fitted as well as sky TV. The apartment enjoys the use of 2 large communal pools and has private parking in an enclosed electronically gated car park. Competitively priced for a quick sale. Ref. K40 €91,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Limited edition bungalow. Only six of this type available in Gran Alacant. Constructed in 2003 and immaculately maintained on a large plot size of 500m2 with a 10 x 5 pool.Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge-diner leading out onto front porch, independent kitchen including white

KITCHENS

POOL TABLES

PETS

PARTY PLANNING

DAMP PROOFING

PLUMBERS

DRAINAGE

PLASTERER

Friday, April 19, 2013 goods, outside galleria, court yard, large garage with electric door, roof top solarium and private parking. Also built in wardrobes, Toldos blinds, air con H/C, security grills, alarm, security doors, bathrooms heaters, outside toilet, outdoor lighting, irrigation system, attractive and well kept gardens, beautifully tiled inside and out, fire place, English TV, phone line. Being sold with top quality furniture. ref L95. €275,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge-diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with established low maintenance very private gardens with irrigation system, electronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosquito nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with separate Jacuzzi section. Within easy walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and close to

REMOVALS

local bus and tram route. Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with working fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, private pool, plot of 550m2, established irrigated gardens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished. Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south-facing, very private villa, with woodland and Alicante views. Situated at the end of a small cul-de-sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge-diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and storage in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of outside parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

Gran Alacant detached villa with converted under build and pool. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge- Diner, Front Porch, Large Solarium, decoratively tiled, Irrigated Garden. BBQ and Log Storage Cupboard. Raised walls for Privacy. Also many extras, toldos blinds, freshly decorated interior, Grills, Mosquito Nets, Air Con H/C, Ceiling Fans, Log Burner Fire, Electric Radiators, Heated Towel Rails, Alarmed, Phone Line, Satellite UK TV, private parking. Plot size 310m2 under build 100m2. price includes all furniture.The under build consists of 2 beds, lounge, kit/utility room. ref L79. €250,000 Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant immaculate outstanding south facing villa in sought after road. Set on a 350m2 plot with 4 bedrooms, 3 baths,large porch, solarium and terraces. The large under build includes a lounge, kitchen, bedrooms, bathroom and patio doors leading to pool area. Internal & external access for under build. Extras include electric radiators, air con H/C, ceiling fans, gas fire, heated towel rails, extended walk-in shower, fitted wardrobes. Decorative tiling inside and

out. Panoramic views towards Alicante Bay, Sky TV, phone line and Internet & Private parking, established gardens, water features and fruit trees. Being sold with exquisite furniture and all white goods. Immaculate finishes and decor. ref L84. €278,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge-diner, independent kitchen, full roof-top solarium with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed, 4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appliances & furniture also there is a utility room, open terrace, and private parking. The urbanisation also offers

RAG AND BONE

many communal pools, tennis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul-de-sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gardens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,private parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref. L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY MANAGEMENT TIPTOP VILLA CARE, total property management, keyholding, holiday and long term rentals. www.tiptopvillacare.co.uk. e-mail linda@tiptopvillacare.co.uk Telephone 968566011 Mobile 667848582

QUIZZES Experienced quizmaster/question setter with

SURVEYOR

personality available to host quiz nights in local bars. Tel:- 664 838 581

SITUATIONS VACANT Kitchen Assistant Part Time required for busy restaurant near San Miguel de Salinas. All year round postion for the right applicant. 633 154 038

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer different Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

WANTED

STORAGE

VAN HIRE

WARDROBES

Friday, April 19, 2013

Greenside Gossip A HOLE WORLD OF DIFFERENCE

IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

I WAS playing at El Plantio Golf the other day with two young lads from the European Challenge Tour, Sam Menzies and Luke Goddard. The ECT is the next step to the main European Tour and they will be playing in Madrid from April 24 to 27 at the El Encin Golf Hotel along with Challenge Tour debutant Javier Ballesteros, Seve’s eldest son. It was an absolute delight to witness how consistently well and long Sam and Luke hit the ball. I was very fortunate as it lifted my game no end which gained me a handicap cut. It then got me thinking (not again!) how far the professionals on the tour would hit the ball on this particular course. So in a quiet moment I tried to compare the differences. Now, I have been privileged to be on the fairways with some of the top PGA players, not playing against them, you understand, doing the on-course scoring for the Tour and with some upand-coming Pros on their way in Pro Ams. So I have some idea of their ability close up, even in earshot of Colin Montgomerie’s expletives. I came to the conclusion that the chasm between top level professionals and the game you and I play is now so vast that they could well be playing another sport. Consider the thought of taking part in a Formula One Grand Prix behind the wheel

Pros are on a different planet to the rest of us

of an 850 cc Mini, and you have just about got the measure of it. The Tour Pro has now got in his bag all this space-age technologically designed equipment. Even the midtable pro hits regularly 300 yards and providing his Odessey two-ball putter works he is looking to break 60 instead of 70. We, on the other hand, shell out hundreds of euros on a Titanium graphite shafted, 460 cc, giant head trampoline sweet spot, great biggest, slotted driver and a Laser beam , heel and toe balanced broom handled, mallet headed, goose shaft putter. Yet we still go and shoot the same 95, which your mate does with his wooden Ping with twine unravelling from the shaft and a putter that could have come from

And would you believe it, the practice facilities are not up to scratch, and while they are using brand new balls (not range balls) they are not the correct brand or compression. So anyone who thinks they have a tedious job should watch them on the practice ground hour after hour hitting balls, checking the video with their guru to make sure his left elbow is still in line with his clavicle cord. It is practice that makes perfect; there are loads of really good players with low handicaps who can hit as long and maybe straighter. The trouble is they cannot score as well. When Pros miss greens and get into bunkers, sometimes on purpose, they are only happy if they get the

TITTER ON THE TEE

KNOW YOUR RULES QUESTION A player’s ball lies just off the putting green and casual water, on the green, intervenes between the ball and the hole. Is the player entitled to: A: Move the ball to a position where water no longer interferes with the player’s line? B: Mop up the casual water? C: Play the ball as it lies with no relief? ANSWER C: In addition Rule 13.2 prohibits the player from removing casual water from his line of play.

ball into the hole. When we go in, two or six whacks later the ball comes out like a Scud missile nearly decapitating some innocent bloke teeing off at the next hole. We follow our peers hoping for greater things, for example we hit a shot that Tiger would be proud, and if we don’t do it again for a couple of years, we dine on it, in the hope that we will. It always brings us back. When Tony Jacklin won the Open some 44 years ago, the next Saturday the local courses were full of golfers wearing their best trousers with a white glove neatly hanging out of the back pocket instead of Levi’s tucked into socks. They would still five putt but at least they looked like golfers. So I guess that the real answer is to get the Pros to play in the same conditions as we do. Okay Tiger, I’ll take you on for five euros front nine, five euros back nine and 10 for the game. But you will have to drink 10 pints of San Miguel the night before, get out of bed late, without ruling out an on-course accident, play with a ball that’s looks as though it has lost an argument with a cheese grater, pull you own trolley while ducking at every shout of “Fore” on your backswing and listening to a Smart phone ringing off.. Now that would even things up just a little!!

the R&A St Andrews museum. The gap between the very best Pros and the journeyman Pro is also quite big, so much so, that at one event Tiger Woods was 64 shots better than the last placed player over the four rounds. So in match play against each other, our poor last man would have to play off a 16 handicap. The boom in golf has meant that there is a rush of high-class players trying to jump on the highly-paid bandwagon. The vast majority of them disappear never to be seen again. Nick Faldo said, that if a player cannot go round his

own course in five under par regularly, (that’s +5 handicap) then he should not consider he could make money on the Tour in Europe or the USA. It is very difficult to make the transition between being a big fish in a small pond, and jump into the sanitised pond of the Tours. Sergio made the move he did without much of a problem, but then he started to whinge about some of the poor conditions we have to suffer. You know, too much sand in the bunkers, the wrong type of grass on the greens, the courtesy car not having DVD and a drinks cabinet in the back.

A Vicar went to the local golf course hoping to find someone to play with. As luck would have it, there was a member in the pro shop looking for a game, so they were introduced and went to the first tee. The member asked, "What's your handicap?" the Vicar replied, "I'm a 12." The member said, "Oh, good, so am I, would you like to play for €2 a hole?" The Vicar agreed, and when they finished they went into the clubhouse. As the minister was shelling out €36 to the member, he said, "I'd like you to come down to the church sometime." The member said, "'I'd like to do that." Then the Vicar added, "and bring your mother and father; I'd like to marry them."

Friday, April 19, 2013

THE ULTIMATE SHAME ON the afternoon of Saturday 15th April 1989 I was repairing my garage roof, with my transistor radio on loud to listen to the FA Cup semi-final between my Nottingham Forest and Liverpool, which looked like a great game. Except as soon as the match started it was stopped as ‘a crowd problem’ spilled onto the pitch: the players were taken off - and it was then that unbelievable horrors started to emerge… As the day wore on, and more news filtered through, I began to feel physically sick. I remembered frightening days, 20 years previously from the sixties and seventies at the City Ground, where I had been caught in claustrophobic crushes in the crowd, me with the added responsibility of always having to look after my little brother, seven years younger. I always used to get to the ground an hour earlier for big matches to get us near the front, where I could be sure he could see, but the worry was then also with a big crowd behind us there would be enormous pressure at the front by people arriving late at the back and shoving for-

IN the wake week of Hillsborough’s horrors, Millwall maniacs muddy football yet again

ward down the terraces. There could also be similar frightening crushes trying to get out afterwards, the memories still bring me out in a cold sweat remembering how helpless and worryingly short of breath I felt, completely powerless to do anything except pray we would get through it - which fortunately we always did. But that fear has never left me, so when I heard that 96 – yes, a ghastly unbelievable 96 people - had left their homes that day to see a football match, and never

returned home to their loved ones, each one suffering horribly with their own tragic, traumatic death in the most awful way. Two hundred more were injured, and had to go on living their lives trying to recover physically and emotionally from a situation nobody should ever have to face. ‘Hillsborough’ is still not sorted out, if indeed it ever could be, but the one thing it did sort out was the terraces, and the dreadful, terrifying pushing and shoving, making the stadiums all seater.The

Taylor Report took a giant step towards stopping fighting on the terraces too, another huge scourge of sixties and seventies football hooliganism.This made policing easier to segregate and control terrace violence. Progress! Except for mindless morons like the Millwall madmen who marred the Wembley semi-final against Wigan on Saturday. Unbelievably these crazy crackpots were actually fighting amongst themselves, proving you can take the

The top and bottom of it!

PHEW! League leaders Elche ended their two-game goal drought, but didn’t burst the banks of bottom-placed Xerex. The Illicitanos have been worrying to watch of late, fortunately the best defence by far in the league has seen the Franjiverdes through this sticky patch - which on the evidence of Sunday afternoon’s performance is not quite over! Carles Gil started the match up front for Fidel, no place for captain Generelo (good), Mantecon keeping him out, otherwise Elche at full strength. A massive 23,897 were watching the hopefullyhappy homeward promotional run-in back to La Liga after a gap of over 30

years. But the visitors hadn’t read the script, tearing into Elche, and from an inswinging corner Herrera was severely tested: it came as no surprise on the quarter-hour when Prieto bulleted in his header to deservedly put Xerex into the lead. Elche huffed and puffed, with first Angel, then Coro having chances, but Xerex were in charge as it finished 0 – 1 at half time. Predictably Big Berry Powel came on for Angel to put some needed muscle into the attack, and soon the crowd favourite ‘Zoomi’ Xumetra, who has missed some pearlers lately, drove a shot into the side netting. But with the crowd unhap-

py and Elche getting desperate Zoomi beat two men and from way out hit a beauty that went in off the far post. Just as we were settling for a draw with five minutes to go Coro’s drive was clearly handled by Prieto, off he went. Left-back Albacar’s trusty left foot rarely fails him and the penalty whistled in to give the Franjiverdes what had looked like an unlikely win over the 90 minutes. The result confirms Elche are now 13 points clear of automatic promotion: big test at third-placed Alcorcon this Saturday - but the Illicitanos fear noone! Mucho Elche!

From zero to hero

KOEMAN missed a late penalty last game, which would have given Torrevieja three valuable points - but was the undoubted catalyst for a crucial win at Catarroja on Saturday evening. Catarroja must be sick to the back teeth of the Salineros, as that is nine conceded in their two ties this term. The hosts were unlucky when a 25 yard screamer hit the underside of the bar but failed to cross the line. Torry responded with strikes from Luis and Dani, both after Koeman had won free kicks in dangerous areas. The Torry target man was playing with confidence and exuberance, tormenting his former team mates with whom he won a championship medal last season.

He was not the only livewire, Manu, Gasch and Luis all taking on opponents and carving open the Catarroja defence at each and every attack. At the rear, the Torry back four were solid, repelling invasions with steely determination. Junma headed home from a corner to give Catarroja hope, but that was dashed within a minute as Torry flashed down the other end for Gasch to lash home. Torry move out of the relegation places up to 15th place, but it is far from over. Fifth placed La Nucia visit this Sunday (5pm K.O.),seeking a win to keep alive their top four play-off ambitions. With Torry still desperate for points to help secure their status, it promises to be a belter! Jeff Scott

voted Family Club of the Year for the second time in three seasons, conquering their hooligans with no sign of trouble at any of the games this memorable season for the Red/Bluebirds. So what is it about Millwall that the trouble goes on and on? In a football world where there are now points deducted and relegation penalties for clubs who cannot adhere to running their clubs probably, then Millwall FC should carry the can for the responsibility of trashing the name of English football, in what should be one of the year’s showcase events at the country’s premier sports arena, the home of English football, Wembley – one Millwall team to Wembley, where all the world is watchbut the yobs come too. ing. In direct contrast to the It’s no good the club disperfectly behaved Wigan associating itself from a few supporters – you know, people and tutting; the yobs those real ‘fans’ who go to represent Millwall and nurfootball matches to roar on ture their disgusting image. the team in a positive man- The perpetrators should be ner - the filth that pass them- put way behind bars for a selves off as ‘supporters’ of good few years - I believe this charmless East End club the term is ‘affray’ and carhave previous form: Millwall ries prison sentences. Football Club and the undeBut Millwall is the club that sirable side of soccer are old the Football Association friends. should take action against, It is interesting to note so heavily that all football that promoted-to-the-Prem can see it must never, ever Cardiff City were for years happen again, by ensuring bracketed with Millwall as that their real ‘supporters’ having the league's worst are just that - not mindless behaved fans. Well, the yobs left over from days we same Cardiff were recently hoped had gone forever.

EVERY DAY’S A FOOTBALL DAY April 22nd 1959 Vic Rouse, of Crystal Palace, becomes the first player from the fourth division to play in an international when he keeps goal for Wales versus England. 23rd 1927 The first FA cup final to be broadcast on radio sees Cardiff take the trophy out of England for the only time when they beat Arsenal 1-0 24th 1915 Chelsea’s Bob Thompson becomes the first one eyed player to appear in an FA Cup final. Chelsea lose what is known as the ‘khaki cup final’ 3-0 to Sheffield Utd. 25th 1938 Baptists, shopkeepers and post office works form an unlikely alliance to protest about the introduction of the football pools, complaining they are immoral, bad for trade and will mean more work. 26th 1902 It is announced in the Manchester Evening News that Newton Heath are to henceforth be known as Manchester Utd. United was apparently the second choice of name for some of the Directors, Manchester Celtic being their first choice. 27th 1993 Ugo Ehiogu becomes the first black player to captain an English national side when he dons the armband for the under 21’s. Compiled by STUART EVANS

Friday, April 19, 2013

DI CAN-KNEE-O! Sergio Aguero: He should have been banned

Going up: Cardiff boss Malky Mackay

The green light suits Paolo John McGregor reports

CANNIYO keep it up, and keep us up, Wearside worriers wanna know? If passionate posing and posturing provides points, Potty Paulo proved priceless in the Prem on Super Sunday, Sunderland nuking nervy neighbours Newcastle 3 – 0 in the Magpies’ own nest. Why aye, that Paolo di Canio’s canny Italian grey suit with the added cool green kneecaps’ll be worth a fortune if Sunderland stay up. You gotta give it hima, thatta

boy’s gotta style... S’all over for Reading ‘n Quickly Perfecting Relegation, innit? The 64,000 dollar question is ‘ooguzdown withem and loses 64,000 million quid a minute? To testy questions after the Hoops’ latest defeat to Everton, Harry Redknapp muttered something about going on holiday, presumably with his long-suffering wife Sandra - Jamaica? Nah, she wanted to go… Wacky Wigan, who can’t get their priorities right, lost in the Cup Final preview to recently resurgent Man City, at last playing the sort of power football that swept ‘em to the Prem prize so dramatically last season – too late this year, tho’ surely the FA Cup’s going

to the Etihad? Down in the dreaded drop department the Grim Reaper’s got one more place waiting to be filled, from Newcastle in 13th down to (game-in-hand) Wigan in 18th: five points difference, six teams, five to play – who’ll blink first? What is it with the sarf Americans’ temperament? I’m happy to report that Uruguayan Luis Suarez appears to be curbing his violent tendencies at last and if Saturday was anything to go by against Reading he was superb, should have four alone, but Liverpool just couldn’t score (hey, that kid Philippe Coutinho looks good: smart buy, Brendan). But in a week when Argentinian Sergio Aguero, despite apparently still carrying a knee injury hits a belting winner against Man United, then scores a brilliant second in the FA Cup semi-final to choke Chelsea, suddenly takes it into his head to lunge, seemingly unprovoked two-footed at (Brazilian) David Luiz, leaving his studs where it hurts - in full view of everyone in the world except referee Chris Foy, who shudagonaspecsavas. Why? Xenophobic against nasty neighbours, or a private (now public) feud? Whatever, it was ugly and he should have been banned by the FA and disciplined by City – nada, zilch pasa– everyone bottled it. Anyway, the Latinos’ve kissed ‘n made up - Serge said sorry,

David deemed de nada, but ahora, gringo – we’re watching. London calling – Capital also-ran championship keeps changing hands: Chelsea chipping up to third as Arsenal choked with Everton in fourth; Spurs in fifth look like they’ve hit the wall - too many 2 – 2 draws, but Man City on Sunday should show Spurs spirit. Cardiff are up, boyo! For the first time in the Welsh club’s history the Red Bluebirds have deservedly been promoted to the Premier League, hierarchy of British football. Well done to manager Malky Mackay and his merry men and all the club’s loyal supporters who have had to put up with some tremendous setbacks along the way to finally make it. It’s beginning to look like Steve Bruce’s Hull City’ll automatically join ‘em, but the clubs below keep beating each other. The play-off picture is still inconclusive with only three games to go, it’s the first four from six. Odds on Watford are in, but Crystal Palace, Brighton, Leicester, Bolton and Forest are all within three points of each other. This Saturday will tell us much as Bolton are at still-in-with-a-shout Middlesbrough, Leicester visit Palace, Brighton home to Blackpool and Forest entertain lowly Barnsley, scrapping at the bottom with Huddersfield, Wolves and Peterborough for who goes down with Bristol City. Hmm...