Week 133

Edition 133

www.thecourier.es

Friday, September 6, 2013

THIRD TIME LUCKY? MADRID BIDS FOR 2020 GLORY

By SALLY BENGTSSON Madrid will find out tomorrow (Saturday) if it is to host the 2020 Summer Olympics.

The games were last held in Spain when Barcelona staged the event in 1992, with Madrid now involved in a three­way shoot out with Istanbul and Tokyo. The cru­ cial vote will be taken at a meeting of the International Olympic Committee in Buenos Aires, with the Spanish capital losing out in previous bids to host the event in 2012 and 2016.

Terrence Burns, the man behind the Madrid bid, has

been hired to convince the IOC. He was the man behind Beijing's success in getting the 2008 event, along with the Winter Games at Vancouver and Sochi, as well as liking to take the credit for Russia being chosen as the host of the World Cup in 2018.

This time around, Madrid is the frontrunner based on IOC inspections, with an overall score of 8.08 as it goes into the final lap, against Tokyo's 8.02 and Istanbul's 6.98. Madrid's organizing committee says that 80 % of the infrastruc­

ture for the Games is already in place, with sur­ veys showing that 8 out of 10 Madrid residents support the bid. What's more, there have been few protests of any size, says Nacho Murgui, the president of the regional federation of Madrid residents' associa­ tions. "We were against the 2016 bid, because we thought that it was more important to deal with the crisis, but this time around there was no doubting our support." That said, he points out that the authori­ ties didn't bother to involve residents' associations in their preparations.

Madrid's organizing com­ mittee says that most of the sports venues are ready.

Critics agree, but say that much of it is underused.

They point to the so­called Caja Mágica, built to house tennis events at a cost of 300 million euros in 2009, and which stands empty almost the entire year round. Then there is the question of whether the Games will generate much­ needed jobs. Mayor Ana Botella initially talked of some 320,000 new posts; this was later reduced to around 150,000, half of which were generated by the 6.5 billion Euros that City Hall has already spent on infrastructure over the last decade. The latest estimate is that if Madrid wins the bid, some 56,000 jobs will be created between now and 2015, with a further 120,000 indirectly.

With bid leaders of the three cities preparing for their final pitch in Argentina, backed on site by political leaders like Spain’s Mariano Rajoy, senior IOC officials say the race has never been so open. “It is not like before when the decision has often been made,” according to IOC Vice President Thomas Bach. “This time I think the presentation in Buenos Aires will be very important, crucial even.”

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Friday, September 6, 2013

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Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

Sunrise over cathedral in Segovia,north west of Madrid PICTURE TAKEN BY PETER AVERY QUESADA.

PAEDO: - IT’S ALL ABOUT REVENGE

A Spanish paedophile released in error from a Moroccan prison has denied accusa­ tions of sexually abusing a young girl in Torrevieja between 2002 and 2004 and claims these were made by the child's father as 'revenge'.

Daniel Galván, 65, says he and the father used to be friends but fell out, and that this is the girl's father's way of getting back at him. His hearing was due to take place last week but was suspended after the victim, who is said to be still underage and was a very small child at the time of the repeated attacks, absconded from the youth centre where she was living for as yet undisclosed reasons.

Given that her parents' declaration was basically hearsay, Galván could not be cross­examined until the teenager's story was heard, meaning her running away frus­

OUCH!

A husband who bit off part of his wife's clitoris during sex has been jailed for five years.

Edwin Osiris was found guilty of assaulting his wife at their home in L'Hospitalet de Llobregat in March last year. A Barcelona court heard how Osiris — married to the woman for 12 years and with whom he has two chil­ dren — sunk his teeth into her genitals.

Despite her blood­curdling screams, he tore out part of her clitoris and one of her labia, and spat them out onto the floor. He fled the home shortly after the attack and tried to leave the country, but was tracked down by Catalonia's Mossos police in the town of Lleida 22 days later.

A judge acquitted him of sexual assault after it could not be proved that the sex was not consensual. A charge of genital mutilation was also not considered, because his wife still had at least some feeling and "function" of her trated the trial. But she was found and staff private parts after the attack. But he was found guilty of at the children's home were ordered to causing injury. As well as the jail term, he has also been hand her over to the court to testify, with the banned from going 1,000­feet near his wife ­­ who did not trial being hurriedly convened for last testify at the trial because her whereabouts are currently Saturday. unknown ­­ for six years. He must also pay her 21 thou­ Galván was jailed for 30 years in 2011 in sand Euros in compensation.

Morocco for the rape and sexual abuse of cers found some cocaine in EVERY LITTLE 11 children aged between two and 14. He their car. A search of one of BITE HELPS owns three properties in Kenitra, northern Elche Council has been their homes then uncovered Morocco and a fourth in Torrevieja, and is currently being held in Madrid’s Soto del given just over seventeen two kilos of cocaine, along Real prison pending hearings for his return hundred Euros to help in with imitation firearms, pest control, including mos­ together with a selection of to complete his sentence in Morocco.

Galván’s solicitor, Manuel Mala said that quitoes in the area. The mobile phones and SIM his client fell out with the girl’s father over grant comes from the cards. car insurance. A woman, who was a mutual Alicante Provincial Counci.

SOUR KRAUTS friend of Galván and the girl’s family testi­ Two Germans were fied on Monday that she was not aware of any child abuse caused by the former arrested on the outskirts on Elche after Guardia Civil offi­ University of Murcia employee.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Sunny High 29° Low 20° Chance of rain 2% Monday Showers High 28 Low 20° Chance of rain 60%

Tuesday Showers High 27° Low 18° Chance of rain 55%

Saturday Showers High 27° Low 21° Chance of rain 55% Wednesday Partly cloudy High 26° Low 21° Chance of rain 14%

Sunday Partly cloudy High 25° Low 20° Chance of rain 7% Thursday Sunny High 26° Low 18° Chance of rain 2%

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Friday, September 6, 2013

TEMPERATURE COOLS OVER GIB SPAIN’S Foreign Minister has thrown down an olive branch to Britain, in an attempt to cool down the recent row over Gibraltar. José Manuel García­Margallo told the Spanish Parliament on Tuesday that friendship with the UK will always prevail, but reiterated that Gibraltar “has been, is, and will be a key focus”.

He used his appearance in parliament to stand up for the actions taken by Spain in the current dispute with the UK over Gibraltar. These actions were in defence of the country's interests in the face of what Spain considered violations by Gibraltar's authorities, García­Margallo said to the country's MPs. The current tensions over Gibraltar began in July after boats from the territo­ ry dumped blocks of concrete into the sea near the territory. Gibraltar said it was creating an artificial reef that would foster fish populations. But Spain said

the reef would block its fishing boats and introduced stringent border checks which it said are needed to stop smug­ gling, creating long waits for motorists trying to enter the territory.

García­Margallo reiterated that Spain couldn't watch on with arms crossed in the face of the creation of the reef and the growing traffic in contraband tobacco.

"The danger is not in our actions, but in doing nothing," García­Margallo added.

The minister also welcomed the European Union's (EU) decision to send inspectors to monitor the situation at the Spain—Gibraltar border. He stressed that Spain had accepted the inspectors' pres­ ence and that the mission hadn't come at the behest of the UK. "Legality is the only framework within which Spain is operating," said García­ Margallo of the country's decision to take up the row with the UK to the European

Courts.

The Foreign Minister highlighted that sovereignty was not the issue in the cur­ rent dispute. Rather the focus was on compliance with EU laws. He said he would support any moves towards the

creation of ad hoc groups to look at fish­ ing and environmental issues, adding these could include representatives from Spain, the UK, the southern Spanish region of Andalusia and Gibraltar as appropriate.

Long confession needed Feathers fly in birdman raid POLICE have said that a video showing a Murcia priest receiving oral sex from a young man in a forest is indeed real. The Courier reported in May that Francisco Javier Ruiz, a priest in Churra, claimed the recording in which a cleric is seen engaging in fellatio with another man was not him.

"I have never been to Coto Cuadros forest and I do not recognize myself in these images that are said to be of me," he said back in May. "This must be a fake. This material should be destroyed because if it is not it is going to create a scandal."

But cops have trashed Ruiz's claims with no evidence found of video tampering. The man who shot the recording told police that he didn't know who the two men were nor did he upload the footage to social media sites like Facebook.

Church bosses in Ruiz’s Cartagena dio­

cese sacked the disgraced cleric after the footage became a trending topic on the inter­ nat. The video shows a bicycle ride filmed by a cyclist who is taking pictures when he sud­ denly passes a figure dressed in black who is performing a sex act with another man.

Coto Cuadros, the forest where the footage was taken, is renowned for being a cruising hotspot – a place where people perform anonymous, casual public sex.

A man who sold exotic birds in La Marina has been arrested after a police raid.

The man used his pet food shop as a front to sell the animals on Sundays, so as to minimise any attention being drawn to him, but the authorities had been tipped off about his clandestine activities.

Police paid him a surprise Sunday visit after an under­ cover officer bought two goldfinches. When the man was asked to declare his full stock of birds, he told his son to open the cages, and some of them flew away. Officers man­ aged to round up 151

Have you a license for this minkey?

Guardia Civil officers in Madrid have seized a Gibraltarian monkey which they found in a car heading for France. They saw a basket in the back of the car, and the driver tried to convince them it had a dog in it.

But when police opened the basket, they found a Gibraltar monkey, which is an endangered species.

The driver was unable to show any

birds, most of which were prohibited from being bred or sold without a license, which the man did not have.

The store owner faces fines of up to 5 thousand

Euros for each unautho­ rised species that he was selling, and he is also fac­ ing charges of not declar­ ing tax, and not having appropriate opening licenses and insurance.

POSSIBLE ABUSE

A couple from San Juan in Alicante have been arrested for allegedly abusing their three month old baby. The child was prove it is his monkey.

Given that it has already been iden­ taken to hospital by the parents suffering from a fever, but a tified as a Gibraltar monkey, it is scan revealed evidence of possible abuse. Social services likely it does not belong to the driver have assumed temporary guardianship of the child. stopped on the R­15 and will be returned to the wild. These are the Spanish supermarket chain, Mercadona, is stretching their only species of monkey which live opening hours. As from Monday, the retailer will keep its 14 wild in Europe – otherwise they are hundred stores open for an extra half an hour through to mainly found in the Atlas mountains 9.30pm. in southern Morocco.

MERCA EXTRA

documentation for the animal, so it was taken to the Acuárium Zoo in Madrid until the alleged owner can

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Friday, September 6, 2013

STROKE OF LUCK Better than nothing

Three people were lucky to escape with only minor injuries after an accident on the AP7 in the Elche area close to the Madrid turn­off.

The incident on Wednesday night had vehicle spin­ ning into a reservation area after being hit by another car. There were major delays whilst the cars removed, but miraculously the pas­ sengers just walked out of the vehi­ cles and only needed treatment in an ambulance.

COSTA JOBS BOOST SPAIN’S unemployment figures showed a fall of just 31 last month, but it’s the first time the August rate has dropped in 13 years, which helps to offer a glimmer of hope that the country might be coming out of recession.

Latest government figures showed the number of people registered as unemployed remained close to 4.7 million and the quarterly rate is still 26.3%, but the number of regis­ tered jobless has been dropping for six months, and the August rate usually rises as summer contracts end.

The economy minister, Luis de Guindos, said the numbers gave hope to Spain, which has been in recession for most of the past four years.

CAR GIANTS PROBE

THE new liberalised shop opening hours for the Orihuela Costa from next month are set to create new jobs. That’s the claim from Orihuela council, who say they have a deal with the La Zenia Boulevard management company that any people that will be brought in for the extra hours will be those who are currently out of work.

DRUG RING BROKEN

SPANISH and Swiss police have smashed a South American­linked cocaine ring, arresting 19 men. The gang moved cocaine from South America to Spain, from where it was shipped to Switzerland and Italy, Spanish and Swiss police said in sepa­ rate statements.

Some 19 people were arrested as part of an investigation that began in November last year: six in Spain including the Gambia­born alleged gang boss living in Barcelona, 12 in Switzerland and one at Italy's Milan airport, they said. Just over three kilogrammes (6.6 pounds) of cocaine was seized.

THE big car companies could face big fines for price fixing in Spain. A few weeks ago the Spanish regulator, the CNC, handed out big fines to rental firms like 15 million Euros to the locally based Goldcar company.

Now the CNC are looking to fry even bigger fish, by turning their attention to big names like Renault, General Motors, Ford, VW, and Toyota. The CNC said there were looking at serious allegations of fixing in new car prices and service contracts which could see the companies being fined up to 10% of their total Spanish turnover.

Hitting the wrong note JUMPER STOPPED

Two men who stole equipment from a rock band and then flogged it off, have been arrest­ ed by the National Police in Yecla. 10 thousand Euros worth of gear was stolen last month, and ended up appearing in second hand shops in Elche and Murcia. The police spotted a guitar that had been up for sale on a website, after the two arrested men sold it on to a man in Murcia who was unaware that it had been stolen

A National Police officer stopped a 44 year old woman from jumping over a sea wall in Cartagena. Security cameras picked up images of somebody standing close to the edge of the Carlos wall, and on investigating the officer found a

woman threatening to take her life.

He spent time trying to talk her out of it, whilst colleagues joined him at the scene. They grabbed her and she was sedated by paramedics sedating, before she was taken to hospital.

A PONY, which had escaped from a farm at El Algar, created havoc on the one motorway which runs along La Manga when it decided to take a stroll along the fast lane last Sunday afternoon. The pony’s outing was in the opposite direction to oncoming traffic, between the exits to San

Gines and that to the RM12. Over twenty calls were made to the 112 emergency services at about 5pm. Fortunately, all the cars managed to swerve to miss the unusual visitor, despite the panic the four­ legged friend caused amongst the startled drivers.

ONE TRACK PONY

Lifeguard cut blamed THE LONG WALK for death RESCUE services sprang into action to save a man who had broken his tibia whilst on La Cruz de la Muela near Orihuela on Monday. The rescue operation stretched into the early morning, with the 33 year old man being picked up at 3.30am, having slipped when on a walk with his brother. 19 rescue workers were involved in bringing him to safety, with the walker being taken to the Vega Baja Hospital.

Guardamar’s swimmers say that a man’s life might have been saved had it not been for the council scrapping their lifeguard serv­ ice. In keeping with many areas, Guardamar stopped their contracting of lifeguards at the end of the summer season, but tragedy struck on Tuesday when a 70 year old man drowned at Origues beach. The body lay on the beach for some 2 hours until it was taken away for an autopsy.

Friday, September 6, 2013

Bigger rise in sex limit THE government has bowed to pressure from the Health Ministry, and will raise the age sexual con­ sent in Spain from 13 years to 16, and not to 15 as it had originally planned. This means that if an adult has sexual relations with a boy or a girl who is yet to reach the age of 16, the adult could be charged with crimes of “abuse.” The offense carries with it jail

terms of up to six years in jail, even if there is consent.

Those terms can rise to 12 years in cases of vaginal, anal or oral penetration.

The new legislation will include one exception: con­ senting sexual relations with an under­16 will not be a criminal offense “when the author is a person whose age is close to the victim due to their degree of devel­ opment or maturity.” This

will all be decided and defined at the discretion of the judge.

These planned changes are included in the latest version of the draft reform of the penal code, which the Cabinet may approve this month. The legislation would then begin its pas­ sage through parliament, where the governing Popular Party currently has an absolute majority.

The great drain robbery

Police have nabbed a gang of 10 bank robbers in Madrid who used the drains to enter and flee from bank branches.

The 10 were suspected of violently robbing seven banks in the capi­ tal. Four members of the gang were captured as they emerged from underground with three firearms, a crowbar and torches after committing a robbery in which they seized more than 60 thousand Euros.

Officers said they detained another four suspects who were waiting outside for their fellow thieves. Two other suspects

were arrested later. "During the investiga­ tion officers found out that the gang leader was the son of a well­known bank robber who used the same method for his bank hits," the police statement said.

All change for Charlotte

A sex change operation must be paid for by state funds after a landmark ruling from the Supreme Court.

The Galicia government has been ordered to pay for a vaginoplasty after a six year battle with Charlotte Goair.

"I've not managed to be happy a single day of my life," Goiar told the El País newspaper, speaking about the psychological problems that stem from her being trapped in a man's body.

Aware of her condition

from a very early age, she's found it hard to find work and fit in due to the anxiety and depression disorders she suffers from. Goiar may now have set a precedent for other people trapped in a body they feel is not theirs, with the state having to cough between 15 and 25 thousand Euros for a sex change operation.

"I can't imagine a greater defect for a woman than having a penis," Goiar told El País as she spoke of her

repulsion at seeing herself naked in the mirror. Until 1981, doctors who carried out sex change operations in Spain faced a prison sen­ tence. Private clinics were the first to undertake these complex medical proce­ dures although public health centres did carry out opera­ tions on babies born with both sex organs. The current situation varies around the country, with Andalusia hav­ ing pioneered public sex change operations in 1999.

A 37 year old football coach from Madrid has been arrested and charged with sexually abusing young teenage boys at a summer football camp in Benidorm.

National Police swooped on the man last weekend,

and faces several abuse charges.

The man, Emilio MH, coached a youth side called Fuenlabrada based in Madrid and the club President, Braulio Gomez, said that he was a very kind and intelligent man

who had fooled every­ body. Gomez added that many parents said that they would only let their children to go to the Benidorm camp if Emilio MH was the coach, because they respected him so much.

Kind man’s dirty secret

KIDS FOOD FEAR

2.3 Spanish youngsters are said to be in danger of malnutrition due to the recession which has forced families to cut back. UNICEF has made the claim through its Child Policies officer, Gabriel Gonzalez­ Bueno.

“A lack of money means that families first lower the quality of the food and buy cheaper. They stop buying meat and fish, later vegeta­ bles and fresh fruit, and instead they eat a lot of pasta and rice which do not contain all the necessary nutri­ ents. Lastly, they reduce the amount of food they eat.”

Gonzalez­Bueno warned that the Spanish food deficit will increase the risk of respirato­ ry and cardiovascular diseases among chil­ dren.

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Friday, September 6, 2013

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Presidents and proxy votes IN a recent edition of The Courier, there was very interesting and important article by George Davis, concerning the real meaning of the proxy vote in Spanish AGM prac­ tice.

Congratulations to Mr Davis for highlighting this problem for the public.

I hve been in Spain a few years, and in the community where I live, the President’s practice is using proxy for his own gains. Why is it

like that?

Most of the property owners in our Community do not the AGM because they do not stay perma­ nently in the Community and are ignoring all that the President wants to create in the premises.

Example: The President decided to install an extra light on the pool area, which nobody needed (except two owners.

The light on the pool is ON the whole night and Iberdrola is happy.

But there is no agreement to fix the gates around the premises.

The total number of Community owners is more than 110 but at the AGM there are about 25 owners present. However, voting goes on smoothly because the President holds a lot of proxy votes.

I agree with George Davis ­ this type of voting is a vote for ‘Democratic Dictatorship’.

STANLEY W.JANYK Orihuela Costa

FIRST WITH NEWS IS NAME OF THE GAME IN your Lead Story on the Front Page of last week's issue, you give the name of my friend Mr Dennis Clouting ­ and at the end you state the victim's identity is not revealed!

No doubt you will get plenty of notices similar to this one.

I am so pleased the police have caught up with ‘S.P.G‘ and hope they throw the book at her.

How can anybody sleep with that on their conscience?

That is to say nothing of the pain and loss his partner, family and friends have had to go through.

Yours is the first paper in which we have seen any news of this terrible accident, and subsequent crime. Thank you for highlighting it.

Nothing will bring Dennis back, but hopefully the accused will get her just desserts and he can Rest In Peace.

MAUREEN SINGLETON I APPRECIATE that you have a frustrated Sun newspaper headline writer on your staff but please can we draw the line at making a clever headline over a tragedy ­ 'Brit and Run’ ­ in last week's edition.

It was a sad story and should have been shown a little more respect. And one question, if the identity of the British victim had not been revealed as stated in the last para of the story, who is the poor Dennis Clouting who was taken to hospital and subsequently died ( para 2)?

MARGARET NODEN, Lomas de Cabo Roig

q

The Editor replies: I'm sorry to have caused any offence but there is no way that I want to work for The Sun in a million years. The identity of the victim was obtained by us late in the day, and I forgot to remove the last sentence as our presses were set to roll. My mis­ take, which I have glared at some 5,000 times in the last week!

WRONG TURN

DON’T FORGET, WE NEED YOUR DETAILS Letters and emails will only be considered for publication if an address and contact number are provided to confirm authenticity A driver had a lucky escape in the Xixona area of Alicante Province on Monday when her car ended up on the edge of a ravine. She was rescued by firefighters after her vehicle veered off the CV800 road at the Carrasqueta ravine in an area that is often used by tourists as a stop off to take photos. A crane was used to lift the car away, with the woman being taken to hospital with sev­ eral injuries.

THE COURIER DOES NOT NECES­ SARILY AGREE WITH THE VIEWS EXPRESSED IN THE LETTERS ON

It’s time to step out for Alzheimer’s once more

THIS year’s memory walk (El Camino de la Memoria) organised by the Alzheimer’s Association is taking place to celebrate World Alzheimer’s Day, which this year is on Saturday, September 21.

The walk will start at 5pm from the main square in Torrevieja, proceed along the Vista Alegro paseo to the Punta Margalla, which is the cape with the Egyptian style columns on it ­ and then return to the main square by the same route .

There is an entry fee of five euros per person in aid of AFA Torrevieja and everyone is encouraged to get their friends and family to sponsor them.

The Kiosko Cabo Cervera is kindly providing water for all the walkers.

Sponsorship forms can be obtained from the Alzheimer’s charity shop in Torrevieja, the Torry Army office at the entrance to San Luis, Jennie Mutter a t jenniemutter@hotmail.com or by telephoning 966 780 595 and Matilde Sanchez on 636 110 251.

Bring the dog (on its lead) bring the buggy (complete with baby) or bring a wheelchair­bound friend. The route is flat, interesting and easy, so come along and help us to beat last year’s total raised.

JUDY FERRIS

LIONEL COUGHS UP

Barcelona star Lionel Messi and his father have reportedly paid 5 million Euros to the Spanish author­ ities following accusations in June of filing false tax returns.

A court statement says that the duo had deposited 5, 016 542.27 Euros last month as a 'corrective pay­ ment'. The Argentine player and his father, who both denied wrongdoing, had allegedly hidden more than 4 million Euros by filing incomplete returns for the years 2006 to 2009. Officials said that the sale of Messi's image rights had been hidden using a com­ plex web of shell companies in Uruguay, Belize, Switzerland and the United Kingdom.

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Friday, September 6, 2013

LICENSED TO TALK QUESTION. If you were being dis­ turbed by live music echoing from a popular bar in your neighbour­ hood, what would you do?

Surely the first port of call bar – and a polite request to the proprietor to tone it down.

However, when the vol­ ume of the entertainment at Rayz Bar hit 75 decibels at 21.25 on August 3, the social scene at El Raso suffered a potentially lethal blow.

Rather than having a quiet word with bar boss Carol Buchan, someone picked up the phone and complained to the police, who subsequently pulled the plug on Rayz’ music licence.

It was an ill­thought­out action – and it opened up another potential ‘war’ which could see the urbanisation’s lively entertainment scene reduced to permanent silence by the local authori­ ties.

The ‘noise’ factor has long been a problem at El Raso, with revelling holidaymakers and peace­seeking residents

has to be the

I wish they’d come to me first, says bar boss silenced over ‘loud’ music

ning and residents happy. And I am told by an insider the may­ oral office has great sympathy for bar own­ ers, believing that a town like Guardamar, which relies on tourists, should be able to offer live music.

That’s a far cry from a couple of years ago, when one bar owner was fined €1000 after a trumped­up com­ plaint about the vol­ Carol Buchan: ’I ume of a folk­music have sympathy duo’s guitars. for the residents’ The bar owner had no music licence, at opposite ends of the spec­ bars to offer live entertain­ unlike Carol, who has had to trum and bar owners caught ment within defined volume cancel all live events in the middle. and time restrictions. because someone chose to For all that, an uneasy With the Spanish economy call the police rather than understanding seemed to sinking ever deeper into the having a quiet word with her have been reached with mire, you’d think the ayun­ about volume levels.

The result was a €300 fine Guardamar Town Hall, allow­ tamiento would be busting a ing the growing number of gut to keep businesses run­ and the rescinding of her

music licence. But Carol still does not know who made the complaint, and would still welcome the chance to dis­ cuss the matter properly.

“I have sympathy for the residents,’’ she says. “I have told the people direct­ ly opposite the bar that if they have a problem with the noise, they only have to come and say ­ and I will turn it down.

“My partner and I have been to neighbours’ houses and listened from there and the sound does carry and can sound louder down the calle opposite.’’

She added: “My message would be the same, ‘if you are not happy, come and see me and I will turn it down.

“This is only for a few weeks a year and we are giv­ ing people jobs and keeping El Raso alive making it a bet­ ter place with entertainment.’’

Carol’s words seem mod­ erate and considered and deserve a proper response, although the complainant may feel uncomfortable about giving up his or her anonymity.

So if you find noise levels at El Raso’s bars difficult to deal with (particularly if it’s you who called the police), how about enlightening us all via an anonymous email to Grumpy Old Gran?

The identity of the person who ‘shopped’ Carol is not important.

What is more interesting is the complainant’s feelings about the consequences of their action for Rayz Bar, its customers, and El Raso’s social scene in general.

Emails are also welcome from anyone who feels Carol has been unfairly sanctioned.

Send all correspondence to donna@thecourier.es

Buddy the angel’s devil of a holiday NO­ONE believes it ­ but I’m a journalist who doesn’t read books. My concentra­ tion span runs to the length of the aver­ age feature article, so unless the plot is riveting from the off, I tend to jump ship long before the second chapter of any best seller.

The same applies to DVDs. Sit me in front of the telly with an Oscar­winning movie and I’ll fall asleep before the open­ ing titles have stopped rolling.

Then, just over two weeks ago, I was introduced to The Born Irritation. Not the latest Matt Damon thriller – its hero is a

Our Buddy ­ note the devil in his eyes

little devil, more of a Demon than a Damon.

Yes, my angelic grandson Buddy found himself a niche as the Grandchild From Hell. Until he came to Spain, his 20 months on this Earth had been pure joy for his mum and dad once he had got over his initial health problems.

Born three months prematurely and weighing just 900 grams, his first week of life threatened to be his last.

But once his condition stabilised, my daughter Hayley’s third child seemed incapable of being naughty. He settled into a sleep­when­asked rou­ tine, gurgled and played con­ tentedly to order. The peace was rarely broken at their home in West Lancashire.

Fast forward to the recent arrival at my home in El Raso of the aforesaid angel, his parents and 13­year­old sister Daisy. It was the first overseas holiday for Buddy, whose cheeky grin and stand­up hair endear him to everyone he meets.

Certainly, his personality­ plus behaviour on my visits to England assured me he would be a pleasure to deal with dur­ ing his 18­day stay in Spain Hayley and Steve were happy to leave Buddy with me and Daisy while they enjoyed the occasional evening out togeth­ er.

But I reckon Buddy got wind of their plans – and devised a routine where he pretended to

be asleep, allowing time for his parents to leave the vicinity, then launched the Demon on the unsuspecting babysitters.

Armed with psychic awareness of my weaknesses, his preferred weapon of attack was to produce the highest decibel level of screaming ever heard. He clearly knew that Daisy and I would quickly cave in under the onslaught.

Yes, Buddy’s cunning plan was to treat his grandmother to a fate worse than deaf.

Once he’d woken up and lifted his head off his cot pillow, there was no chance of him nodding off again. Or of any living creature within 50 metres of the cacopho­ ny getting some shut­eye.

Last Sunday, Daisy and I had the ‘plea­ sure’ of a three­hour sequel to The Born Irritation. Six times we brought the Demon downstairs after a surprise wake­up esca­ lated to hysterical screaming.

Six times those hysterics mellowed to beams and giggles the moment Buddy reached the lounge. And six times we knew Buddy was playing a game only he could win.

In the unlikely event that The Born Irritation appeals to you, I can confirm that it’s a real scream. Loads of screams, in fact.

But, jolly good yeller that he is, our little devil is still the best Buddy in the world.

8

Friday, September 6, 2013

9

Friday, September 6, 2013

YOU’RE NICKED A CLEAN BILL

The final countdown has started in Spain for the UK crime­ fighting charity Crimestoppers and the Serious Organised Crime Agency (SOCA), as only ten most wanted individuals remain on their Operation Captura list following the arrest of the 53rd target.

Operation Captura is the suc­ cessful multi­agency campaign which iden­ tifies individuals on the run in Spain who are wanted by UK law enforcement agencies for serious crimes committed in the UK. With 53 of the 65 individuals included in the campaigns since their launch 7 years ago, the list, the hunt is on for the final ten remaining fugitives who include some of the UK's most dangerous individuals. Many of those arrested are now serving lengthy prison sentences for their crimes, which range from drug trafficking to sex crimes to murder.

The latest arrest was that of Darren Kevin O’Flaherty, who was detained in North Wales last month whilst cel­ ebrating his birthday in a Chinese restaurant. The 39­ year­old was wanted for kidnap and robbery offences for his involvement in an HGV driver being held at knife­ point while his lorry was driven from North Yorkshire to Liverpool. Other recent high profile arrests include that of Mark Lilley, one of Britain’s most wanted fugitives, found hiding in a panic room when officers raided a lux­ ury villa in Malaga in July.

The 50th Operation Captura arrest took place in May when Andrew Moran was arrested on the Costa Blanca for an aggravated robbery that took place eight years ago. Awareness of the last ten fugitives is being high­ lighted across Spain in areas with a large British expa­ triate community such as Malaga and the Costa Blanca,

which are potential hideouts for fugi­ tives on the run from British law enforce­ ment.

Roger Critchell, Director of Operations at Crimestoppers, said: “With the arrest of O’Flaherty we are down to the final ten remaining fugitives left on the run from our Operation Captura campaign. The suc­ cess of these appeals means that they won’t be out there for long. The recent arrests we have seen have proven again that the cooperation between UK and Spanish law enforcement, SOCA and the public is essential in this fight against crime. It is thanks to them that we only have ten crimi­ nals left on this list.”

Dave Allen, Head of the Fugitives Unit at SOCA, said: "The exceptional level of collaboration between Spanish and UK law enforcement authorities has resulted in 17 fugitives being arrested since April, including a number of Operation Captura targets, which is a remarkable result. The final ten on our list, who may well still be hid­ ing out in Spain, should also expect to be brought before the UK courts. SOCA will soon become part of the new National Crime Agency (NCA), and will continue to work with the Spanish authorities to capture crimi­ nals fleeing justice.”

Crimestoppers is asking the public to join the fight against crime and to view the appeals on the most want­ ed section of Crimestoppers’ website, then give infor­ mation about anything they know about the individuals featured.

Calls to the Spanish telephone number 900 555 111 are answered in the UK by Crimestoppers’ call agents and a translation service is available upon request.

OF EHIC

Brits living in Spain can find out more about their rights in using their European Health Insurance Cards (EHICs) in a series of meetings across the Costa Blanca.

Martyn Standing, from the UK Department of Health, said, “After a lot of stories in the media about EHICs over the last few months, this is a great opportunity for expats to come and get the facts straight from the horse’s mouth.

“Given the recent changes to the state healthcare system and the latest news regarding the Spanish Government Insurance Scheme, which will pro­ vide state healthcare for people who aren’t cur­ rently covered, Britons living in Spain really shouldn’t miss the chance to get to one of the final talks on EHICs”.

The campaign has also targeted the administrative staff of the Valencia Health Authority to explain how the UK government covers its citizens in Spain and how their medical care is funded.

Comprehensive information on the use of EHICs can be found at www.healthcareinspain.eu Martyn Standing’s talks will be staged at the fol­ lowing venues and will start at midday.

Sept 10th – Guardamar del Segura – Casa de Cultura, Calle Colón, 60 Oct 2nd – San Fulgencio – Ayuntamiento de San Fulgencio, Centro Social, Calle San Fransisco de Asís, Urb La Marina Oct 3rd – Orihuela Costa – Ayuntamiento de Orihuela Costa, Salon de Actos, Playa Flamenca Oct 22nd – Santa Pola – Casa de la Cultura, Calle Elche 24 Nov 5th– San Miguel de Salinas – Casa de Cultura de San Miguel de Salinas, Plaza Jaime Dec 11th – Pilar de la Horadada ­ Casa de Cultura, Salón de Actos, Calle Carretillas, 19 Dec 12th – Algorfa ­ Centro Cultural San Vicente Ferrer, Calle Mayor, 33

10

Friday, September 6, 2013

MY LOVESICK BLUES

The first person ever to break my heart was a girl named Brenda. I had just turned 10­years­old and she was (and I hope still is) a few months older. She vowed to be my sweetheart forever but her life pledge didn't last long.

I blame the parents. Her mother and father decided to settle in Australia and the inconsiderate couple insisted on taking their darling daugh­ ter with them.

Apparently, young Brenda had an Uncle Sydney living in Adelaide. Or maybe it was an Aunt Adelaide living in Sydney. Either way, I was left distraught at her departure.

My best pal Eric, the future dentist, tried his hand at consoling me but he made matters only worse.

'There's no need to be that upset,' he tried to reassure me. 'It's not as if Australia is on the other side of the world.'

I glared at him. 'You're a good friend, Eric, but your knowledge of geography is profoundly lousy.'

Eric was most impressed with my use of the word 'pro­ foundly' and reckoned that when I grew up, if my firewood round failed to take off, I should con­ sider becom­ ing a diction­ ary compiler.

A n y w a y, there was no getting

away from it. My Brenda had gotten away from me. My heart was heavy with hanker­ ing. My soul was swollen with sor­ row.

Blimey, was I in an allit­ erative mess.

While my pri­ mary school con­ temporaries played tiggy­it and other chas­ ing games at

playtime, I would shuffle around the perimeter of the yard on my lovesick little legs, muttering made­up romantic poems that didn't quite rhyme.

One day I was called to the headmistress's study after I became somewhat discom­ bobulated while performing my joint duties as both ink monitor and milk monitor.

With my mind still on mat­ ters of the heart I got it wrong and tipped the contents of the small bottles of milk into the desk inkwells and then poured the contents of the big ink jug into the newly­ emptied milk bottles.

The headmistress was not best pleased. 'Young David,' she sighed, 'You tend to spend all your time in some existentialist fog and march to your own dream­state drummer. But I fear it is my duty to drag you back into the real world of rationality.'

My brain was buzzing as I wondered what was coming next. Whatever it was, it was­ n't going to be to my advan­ tage.

The school head went into really serious mode. 'If the news did manage to pene­ trate the mists which cover the receptive area of your skull's interior, you will be aware, young David, that after the morning break, 27 of your classmates were fer­ ried in a fleet of ambulances to hospital following an out­ break of blue lips.'

'Hmm,' I said. 'Sounds like pulmonary hypertension to me.'

'No, young David. It was an outbreak of inadvertent ink drinking.'

'Okay,' I shrugged. 'But surely I deserve a prize for knowing about aspects of the body's circulatory system?

I'm only 10, you know.'

The headmistress reached for the tray of dolly mixtures she kept on her desk to reward the scholastic achievements of her charges ­­ and she locked away the sweeties in her drawer.

She went on: 'I need to have a chat with your father.

Please ask him to come to the school at 12 o'clock

tomorrow.'

'It'll be just like the show­ down in High Noon,' I ven­ tured excitedly when I got home. 'The headmistress is the baddie and Dad is the sheriff.'

My mother said: 'Can't you get anything right, our David? Gary Cooper wasn't a sheriff in High Noon. He was a marshal.'

Mother turned on her heel and disappeared into the kitchen to pluck a chicken for tea.

I looked at Dad. 'Sheriff or Marshal? Can you see a dif­ ference?'

'No, Son,' he sighed.

'There is never anything dif­ ferent about your mother.

She is consistently strange.'

'So what happened at the showdown?' asked my best pal Eric the day after the sup­ posed shoot­out. 'Did your dad manage to beat the headmistress to the draw?'

'The duel never materi­ alised,' I said. 'The school had to shut down because the inkwells were clogged with spoiled milk.'

11

Friday, September 6, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 87

atos nuevos Next was straightforward translation from English into Spanish:

This week I will be giving you the answers to last week’s revision exercises along with what was covered in weeks 46­85, but first I received an e­mail from loyal reader and Spanish learner Joyce who told me of a friend of hers who was here but didn´t speak a word of Spanish, the friend asked Joyce who Alberto Domingo was as she kept seeing his name all over the place, Joyce thought she meant Placido Domingo, the tenor, until she went shopping with her friend who pointed out the name on a sign, except it wasn´t a name, what Joyces friend had been reading was Abierto Domingo!

This certainly brought a smile to my face but at least it shows Joyces friend was taking an interest in the Spanish signs.

Here is a list of the previous lessons from 46 – 86: 46.

Personal pronouns, 47,48 Nouns, 49,50 Reflexive verbs, 51. Ponerse, volverse, hacerse, 52. Revision, 53.

Answers, 54 Idiomatic expressions: dar, haber, hacer, tener 55 Commands, 56 Negative commands, 57,58,59 Adverbs, 60 Present perfect (­ing) 61 Past perfect (­ing), 62 future tense (will), 63 Revision, 64 Answers, 65 SABER and CONOCER 66,67 Subjunctive, 68 ESPERAR, 69 CREER 70 revision, 71 answers, 72 Conditional tense (would) 73,74 Prepositions 75 Useful phrases, 76 Revision, 77 Answers, 78 Future and conditional perfect, 79 Tips to learn, 80 Pronounciation, 81 Passive voice, 82 idiomatic con­ structions, 83 Idiomatic Expressions, 84,85 Object pronouns, 86 Revision.

I hope you find the list useful to refresh yourself when you wish to revise certain sections of Spanish.

Here are the answers to last weeks revision work. Firstly you were conjugating the verb in brackets into the conditional

Do you have any friends in other countries? tense. The verb you should have written is highlighted here: Ellas no (saber) decírtelo – sabrían, Este billete no (valer) nada en diez años – valdría, ¿tu (querer) una gran boda? – querrías, Yo no (hacer) el desayuno para ti – haría, Next fill in the blanks, no clues this time just see what fits: El ……hermano.... de mi madre es mi tío, hace …tanto….. frío que no quiero salir de casa, Mi amiga Racheal ……tiene....

23 años y …vive... En España, Tú …eres…uno de …… los…. mejores compañeros que tengo, todos ……los…días de este mes me …he... levantado a las 6.oo am, mi Amiga Julia …es……. alta, delgada y ……tiene..… ojos azules, Cuando tengo tiempo libre ……me……….gusta ……bai­ lar…. Este regalo es…para.. Pablo …por….. su cumpleaños, Mis amigos ……son…….de Madrid, pero ahora …están…. aquí, Me ……gustan……. mucho tus zap­

The shops are far from our house but I still walk there because I don´t like to go on the bus. –Las tiendas están lejos de nuestra casa pero todavía camino (ando) por allí porque no me gusta ir por autobús, “do you have any friends in other countries?” “yes I have loads” – “¿tienes algunos amigos en otros países?”

“Sí, tengo un montón” (OR tengo muchos/muchísi­ mos) When our team doesn´t win, we get sad – cuando nuestro equipo no gana, nos ponemos tristes. I like to take a walk on the beach in the evening – me gusta pasear en la playa por la tarde, Tell me the truth! Do you like cats? ­ ¡Dime la verdad! ¿Te gustan los gatos? They go a lot farther – Ellos van mucho más lejos, Is anyone there? No, there is no­one ­ ¿Hay alguien ahí (allí)? No, no hay nadie, I am going to give him some water – le voy a dar agua, tomorrow I am going to wake up at seven o´clock and go to work at eight – mañana me voy a despertar (voy a despertarme) a las siete e ir a trabajar a las ocho., my leg hurts – me duele la pierna, You should see that film, it´s very good – Debes ver esa película, es muy buena, I live in Spain, in a big house with my three sons and two daughters, I love Spain – Vivo en España en una casa grande con mis tres hijos y dos hijas, me encanta España.

How did you get on? The new school term starts soon and everyone goes back to work and we´ll be moving on in Spanish as well. Remember, the most important thing you have when speaking Spanish is confidence, you know now a lot of words and how to put them together to make a sen­ tence, the only way to improve is to get out there and use it.

Have a great week!

12

Friday, September 6, 2013

DOGGY FACTS OF LIFE Dogs are fascinating animals and here are some facts about our furry friends that may be of interest to you.

When dogs are born they have no hearing and no sight.

The one thing that is working is something they will use more than anything else for the rest of their lives, their nose.

After around two weeks, their ears open and after three weeks so do their eyes.

A fully grown dog has forty two teeth. Dogs do have mem­ ories, but unlike humans, they live in the moment. A dog will not lie down and think about the past or future like we do.

An abused dog, knows they were abused, but they will not relive it in their minds like some humans will.

Dogs know when you are going to taking them for a walk, because they are masters at studying our body language. No one knows us better than our dogs. They also know what is going on inside our bodies. They know 100% accurately, when we are sad, happy, nervous, anxious, frustrated or calm. The best emotion you can show when around dogs is calm. This then transfers to the dog, as would a negative emotion.

Dogs are colour blind. They cannot see all colours but do recognise blues and yellows.

To a dog, orange and green are the same, so if you play with an orange toy in the grass, you may find your dog loses this rather easily. Dogs can process a moving object a lot quicker than we can. If you ever play ball with your dog, have you ever noticed how good they are at catching it? It is as if they see in slow motion. Also, have you ever noticed a differ­ ence in your dog when taking them on an evening walk? The reason for this is because they can see a lot better in the dark than we can. When taking your dog out when it is dark, you would not see a moving object some distance away, but your dog is well aware of it.

Their hearing is also superior to ours. They can hear things

four times farther away than us. So if you think your dog is barking at nothing tonight, you would be wrong! When breed­ ing dogs, humans have in the past concentrated on certain traits that were important to them. Take for instance the German Shepherd. Humans wanted this breed to have superb hearing, which is why their ears stand up. On the other hand, a Labrador Retriever has floppy ears, because the human did not want them getting distracted with noises, when retrieving.

On the subject of German Shepherds, you will have noticed that some people call this breed an Alsatian. There is in fact no such breed as an Alsatian. They do not exist. The reason why you may be familiar with the name is because it was made up by the English, as after the war, they refused to call anything German.

As you will be aware, a dog’s sense of smell is far greater than ours. The part of a dog’s brain that controls smell is forty times larger than ours. It is a well­known fact that dogs can smell cancer and many have saved their owners lives because they kept smelling or licking where the cancer was.

A dog smells the world, we see it. I have been contacted in the past by people worried about their dog who went blind.

There is no need to worry, as long as a dog has the function of smell, they adapt very quickly to no sight. A dog likes to keep their nose wet, because this increases their sense of smell.

Finally, I have one last interesting fact for you about dogs.

When it comes to being best friends, they are a lot better at this job than humans!

I am available for consultations throughout the Costa Blanca region, if you are having problems with your furry best friend. To book a consultation you can email me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will contact you straight away.

We have also set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900. Even One Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us. Thank you.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Benni – Rescued from his life on a chain, lonely and neglected, he spent his time chewing stones and hiding in the bushes.

He is just a small little boy about three years old, loves to be cuddled and happy to be loved.

He needs a special person to love him forever and give him the life he deserves.

He is castrated and he has had all his injections Contact 616655789 for more details Cats N Dogs Aid Association.

Reg. No G54658810 www.catsndogsaid.com

Benni Polly and Dolly are 8 weeks old and dumped in a bag beside a bin, they were cra­ wling with fleas and weigh just 1 kilo so will be small when fully grown. Call: 645 469 253 www.petsinspain.com

polly and Dolly

Mummy is a young small 2­3 year old dog, she was found outside a house along with her puppy that has now been homed. She is not very big only 7 kilos, her carer has said she is such a sweet well behaved dog. To find out more about mummy, please telephone the PEPA help­ desk on 650 304 746 or email: p.e.p.a.animalcha­ rity@gmail.com

WISPA She is 6 weeks old and was bottle fed with her brother. they are now weaned and although her brother has found a home, Wispa is still looking. she is very affectio­ nate towards people and has grown up with other cats and dogs too, she loves to play with them all. Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Maisey was born approx Feb 2013, she is a small Portuguese podenco cross so she will not be very big.

She is full of fun and very loving and of course beauti­ ful to look at. If you can offer this super girl a home or for more information please ring 650 304 746 or email p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail .com

DALMA is 14 months old and has been used to a home environment. She is a quiet and friendly little girl who is fully vaccinated, micro chipped and will be spayed in the very near futu­ re.

For more information please call 966 710 047, email info@satanimalrescue.com

Lara is an 8 month old, lovely little girl. She was found very, very frightened and covered in fleas, but her time in a foster home has given her lots of confidence. She will still be small when she is an adult dog. To arrange to meet Lara, please contact Yvonne on 630 422 563.

Wispa

Maisey

Dalma

Lara

Mummy

Friday, September 6, 2013

13

LÍNEA DIRECTA ADVISES YOU HOW TO ACT IN CASE OF AN ACCIDENT Línea Directa Insurance advises you of the steps to follow in case of a road accident in Spain.

1.

Call the emergency number: 112. They will co­ordinate the procedure and will ask you in detail about the circumstances of the accident.

Call 966 921 003 NOW!

2.

Remain calm at all times. Switch on the emergency lights and if the state of the vehicle permits, remove the vehicle from the road, in order to avoid delays and further accidents, to the extent possible.

3.

Signal the accident location. Before stepping out of the car, put on your high­visibility jacket, which is compulsory, and place the emergency triangles correctly. The first must be placed about 50 metres behind the car in the direction of the traffic, and the second about 100m.

4.

If someone is seriously injured, never try to move them, except if in danger of fire or imminent explosion. Cover the injured per­ son, keep them calm and wait for the emergency services to arrive.

5.

If the circumstances of the location allow, always fill in the European accident report, which is an essential document for speed­ ing up the procedures and handling between the insurance companies.

If you have any doubt about how to do this, don’t hesitate to call your insurance company.

For more information, Call 902 123 104

14

Friday, September 6, 2013

A MEANS TO AN END

I have a very good friend here on the Costa Blanca, who helps me out a lot with my son when I have things to do whilst I help her out in return with translating for example.

Another way we help each other is with her work, as she runs a successful cleaning busi­ ness and has a large number of properties that she has to prepare before the holiday makers come out for their days of sun and sangria. It is a business she has been operating for many years, but she also has regular cleans that she does for people who live here. I help her in the summer by cleaning a few times a week so she can stay on top of her workload, whilst she helps with my son when I´m teaching or need a night out without the boy! It´s a case of help­ ing a friend in need and cleaning has to be one of my least favourite pastimes but I do it because of the help she gives me and because she is a friend. When I was cleaning one house on my own, I suddenly got a bit of inspiration for this week’s column!

I moved to London when I was twenty years old from a little seaside town on the South West coast. I hardly had any money to my name and stayed with relatives. However, hav­ ing no cash, I was desperate to find a job and so I signed on with a couple of companies. One was a cleaning agency and the other was a hotel agency, for waitressing work. I got a few regular cleaning jobs, with my houses that I had to clean being in the most exclusive parts of London like Knightsbridge and South Kensington. To get to one house, I would have to walk past Harrods! At twenty years old, I didn´t mind the cleaning jobs, as it helped to pay for what I needed

until I found more regular employment and I was living where I wanted to be. While I was growing up in the small town, I dreamt of moving to the city. I was taken to London for my birthdays and went as much as possible. When I finally moved there, it was like my dreams were coming true, and, at the time, they were. Therefore cleaning wasn´t a drag, it was a way to be where I wanted to be.

Of course life in London was full of ups and downs. At one point I was homeless and I remember standing on the plat­ form at London Bridge train station with all my belongings in a black plastic bin bag, but of course my life improved dra­

matically. I joined the police and lived a comfort­ able life until I decided to give it all up for a new start in the sun. Coming to Spain, I had to start again making a life. It wasn´t easy and I did a few jobs that I really didn´t particularly enjoy, like bar work and waitressing again but it was a means to stay here. My life took a huge downturn with the troubles I had in my relationship and I reached an all­time low point. Fortunately, my life began to turn around again and now my rollercoaster is on the way up and I have just moved into a lovely house with plenty of room for my boy and I. My life has become a lot more comfortable once again, and as I was sweeping the stairs in the house I was cleaning, I began to think back to those old London days; the days when I was happy to be cleaning big expensive houses just because it meant I could be where I wanted to be. I found myself remembering the same thing, as I am so grateful to be in Spain, living a com­ fortable life and making a home for here for me and my son. Spain is such a better place to raise a child than London and I know that I made the right decision, and if I have to clean a few houses then so be it. I know my friend will do the same for me when I need a favour.

To me, the true test as to whether you are meant to be in the place you are living is if you are enjoying your work, what­ ever it may be. Of course I enjoy teaching. It is what I trained for and it is fulfilling for me. I hate cleaning, but because I am doing it in Spain it is bearable and I can even enjoy it, because I know that it is only for a couple of hours and I can go and relax by the pool or sunbathe next to my pool when it´s all done. This is the life. This really is living the dream.

15

Friday, September 6, 2013

LEGACY OF THE DODGY DOSSIER

Was it a cop­out or an accurate reflection of British public opinion?

The talking still hasn’t stopped over the Commons vote against Britain getting involved in military action against Syria, and I take my hat off to the MPs who said they were not getting involved in a set of air strikes without any hard evidence.

Why was David Cameron in such a hurry to get a man­ date without waiting for the report of the UN inspectors over the use of chemical weapons in Syria?

It was a massive political misjudgment of timing by the Prime Minister, yet he is to be applauded in allowing Parliament to have a say on such a crucial matter: ­ something that Tony Blair

refused to do ahead of the attack on Iraq over a decade ago. We all remember Blair and the dodgy dossier claim­ ing Saddam Hussein had weapons of mass destruc­ tion, which turned out to be a big lie, and this was payback time by MPs who had their

fingers on the pulse of the country. They were only allowed a debate once the Iraqi invasion happened, and it was all a done deal.

People have been rightly sickened by the gut­wrench­ ing images coming out of Syria, but there should be a

co­ordinated order in taking action, and that means using the United Nations. It also means lobbying countries like Russia and China for support on the back of irrefutable evidence that the Assad regime did use chemi­ cals, which they probably

did. Once all avenues of diplomacy and co­ordination are genuinely exhausted, then some thought ought to turn to military action, but only as a last resort, and even then extreme caution should be exercised.

Mr.Blair wrote in a Sunday newspaper that he was unhappy by last week’s Commons vote, but I’m afraid it was an unwelcome inter­ vention from a man who treated Parliament as a dish­ cloth, taking decisions across the board without consulting MPs and making key announcements in the media, rather than in the House of Commons.

Meanwhile, US President Obama has taken the unusu­ al step of consulting Congress over military

action, in a sure­fire sign that the American public has the same concerns, after their disastrous adventure in Iraq.

It’s sad to think, yet under­ standable, that everyone is so cautious now because of the folly of Blair and Bush, and that thousands of Syrians are losing their lives or being displaced, because of the lack of action. That’s all down to the lies over a decade ago and the legacy of distrust that politicians have left us with. Blair and Bush have in effect Syrian blood on their hands because now the free world is scared to intervene, and of course their lies also stretched to the United Nations. It is all very sad but it is yet another example of history teaching us a lesson.

16

Friday, September 6, 2013

LOSING YOUR MARBLES? Watch the mobile birdie Don’t be floored by stains and damage – clean up with Simply Pro Floor Care

Mike Butler, who owns Simply Pro Floor Care, has been in the cleaning business for over 30 years; from 1997 till 2008, he had specialised in floor maintenance and carpet cleaning in the south of England and the last 5 years he has specialised in marble care in Spain.

After attending several stone restoration courses in London, he sold a very successful cleaning busi­ ness in Hastings and moved over to Spain to concentrate on stone floor care. There is very little Mike doesn't know when it comes to the cleaning industry and in the last few years his passion for stone restoration and mar­ ble polishing has grown as he has worked all over the Murcia region and along the Costa Blanca

Taking quick snaps on your mobile phone has become a serious business, with the Costa Blanca set to celebrate mobile phone photographers and the good they can do to promote the area in a special event based at Torrevieja’s Municipal Theatre.

Mowo Costa Blanca 2013 will have some 200 people from around Spain and Europe, in addition to those from as far as Australia, joining in a 3 day conference from next Friday (September 13th) to see how the region can be promoted through social net­ work sites, by using mobile phones. It’s believed to be the first kind of event to high­ light the concept of mobile phone photogra­ phy in Europe, and will be open for anybody to have a look round and to drop in at the various events.

Five internet bloggers using Instagram are travelling round taking in various places on the Costa Blanca, including Alicante, Elche, Benidorm, and Orihuela, taking images using their phones, prior to the start of the event.

A Guardia Civil officer at the Gibraltar bor­ der was knocked over by a motorcyclist last Wednesday who was trying to dodge police and get past the inspections on commuters heading into and out of the Rock.

The policeman suffered minor injuries, and it was the second incident of its type in the customs inspection queue at the Spain­

Gibraltar border in less than a month.

Guardia Civil officers say they are suffering stress and insults from people stuck for hours in the queue. But commuters crossing the border say they have undergone bullying behaviour from police and seen them delib­ erately destroy private property with no motives.

Nothing to declare

and Costa Calida.

Mike’s main work is pol­ ishing and repairing dull and damaged marble floors but he also reno­ vates stone stairs, fire places, furniture, bath­ room tops and kitchen work tops. He is very happy to come out and give you a no obligation quote and a demonstra­ tion to show you how good your marble can look. If you need any work done or would just like to

talk to a professional, please call him on 691 649 515 ­ Day 966 721 331 – Evenings.

17

Friday, September 6, 2013

Easy 20 minute puds Desserts needn't be a laborious task. We've put together a collection of fantastic puds that can all be easily made in under 20 minutes.

Mini black forest gateaux This black forest gateaux dessert recipe takes only 10 minutes to make. Mini sized portions with plenty of flavour!

and serve with almond biscotti, if you like.

Classic Italian affogato Ready in 10 minutes, this Italian classic is so simple. Douse vanilla ice­cream in espresso coffee. The chocolate is optional.

dessert glasses. Drizzle 1 tablespoon Baileys over each. Slice the bananas and divide the slices between the glasses.

Dollop a spoonful of toffee sauce over each, followed by a few spoonfuls of custard. Chill until required.

2. To serve: In a bowl, whip the double cream and vanilla extract until thick, spoon into each glass and decorate the top with edible gold or silver balls.

Mango fools

This Asian­inspired dessert is a creamy, fruity end to a quick mid­week menu of Thai green chicken curry, baked rice and quick Thai salad.

Ingredients 1. 3­4 mini chocolate brownies 2. A few spoonfuls of cherries (from a can) and their syrup 3. A good dollop of lightly whipped double cream 4. Some grated plain chocolate

Method

1. Layer chocolate brownies, cherries and their syrup in 4 tumblers or dessert glasses.

2. Top each with a good dollop of lightly whipped double cream and some grated plain chocolate.

Instant frozen yogurt A deliciously light and fruity pud that's on the table in just 5 minutes!

Method

1. Place natural yogurt in a food processor with the icing sugar and orange liqueur (optional).

2. Add frozen forest fruits and whizz until blended.

3. Spoon into 6 small glasses or bowls

This quick lemon dessert recipe is infused with warming ginger and zesty lemon. A sim­ ple, special pud.

Ingredients

Method

1. Make the espresso coffee, which will be enough for 4 little after­dinner coffee cups.

2. Put the ice cream into 4 dessert glasses or cups. Drown (the literal meaning of affogato) each with coffee and serve while warm and melting. For an added treat, you could melt a few pieces of plain chocolate in the hot coffee before pouring over the ice cream.

Toffee banana trifles Need a quick and easy trifle? You can put this recipe together in 20 minutes

Ingredients Ingredients 1. 400g ready­diced ripe mango 2. Grated zest and juice of ½ lime 3. 150ml double cream 4. 2 tsp light brown soft sugar 5. 50ml Greek yogurt 6. 1 tbsp peeled or desiccated coconut, toasted 7. Bonne Maman coconut biscuits to serve

Method

1. 500g tub natural yogurt 2. 4 tbsp icing sugar 3. 2 tbsp orange liqueur (optional) 4. 500g frozen forest fruits 5. Almond biscotti, to serve

Lemon curd and ginger fool

1. 200ml made­up hot strong Cafédirect espresso coffee 2. 4 scoops good­quality vanilla ice cream 3. Plain chocolate (optional)

1. Place the mango and lime juice in a food processor and whizz to a smooth purée.

2. Whip the cream, sugar and yogurt together until the mixture forms soft peaks.

Ingredients

Stir through half the mango purée then fold in the rest to make a rippled effect. Spoon among 4 small glasses and top with the toasted coconut and lime zest. Place in the fridge until ready to serve. Serve with coconut biscuits on the side

Ingredients 1. 6 slices shop­bought chocolate cake 2. 6 tbsp Baileys 3. 3 medium bananas 4. 6 tbsp dulce de leche toffee sauce (we like Merchant Gourmet) 5. 500g tub fresh custard 6. 142ml carton double cream 7. Splash of vanilla extract 8. Edible small gold or silver balls, to dec­ orate

Method

1. To prepare: Break up the chocolate cake into pieces and divide between 6

1. 1 ball stem ginger in syrup, finely chopped, plus 1 tbsp syrup 2. 75g mascarpone 3. 4 tbsp icing sugar 4. 250ml double cream, lightly whipped 5. 8 tbsp lemon curd (we like Duchy Originals Organic Traditional Lemon Curd, from major supermarkets)

Method

1. In a large bowl, beat the stem ginger syrup, mascarpone and icing sugar together until smooth.

2. Lightly fold in the whipped cream, then stir through the lemon curd with a fork so it is streaked.

3. Divide the lemon curd fool between 6 glasses and top with the chopped stem gin­ ger. Serve with ginger thins, if you like.

18

Friday, September 6, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav­ ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

TIP: Rob was having problems with spell checking in TIP: Bill wanted to know how to change the size of the Outlook icons on his desktop Hi Richard, since "Outlook" has taken over my laptop (!) when I try and use the "Spell check", I now get the message “Unable to process the spelling request, please try again later." Have looked at "Tools" but can't see any ref to spell check. Any thought to where I should look to sort it. Thank you. Rob.

Hi Richard. Can you help me with my problem?

Ever since I downloaded windows updates my desktop icons have tripled in size taking up half the screen I have tried to find a way to reduce them back to normal size but with no success.

Any suggestions?

Thanks in anticipation, Bill

Q

Q

Hi Robert, I'm not sure how you are performing the spell check, however in the new version of Hotmail (Outlook), words that are considered miss­spelt are simply under­ lined in red, you can then right hand click the word/s in question and a choice of alternatives is shown.

If this is not the case for you then do come back to me with specifically what is happening in your instance.

A

ADVICE: Trevor wanted to know how to set up a new Gmail email address

Q A

Hi, how does one change their Google email address, reason since I made IE my browser I am receiving approx.

200 spams a day seems a coincidence since I changed from Google Chrome.

Hi Trevor, in order to set up a new Gmail account you should go to... https://accounts.google.com/SignUp ...and complete the information online.

I agree with you it is a coincidence that you are receiving spam after moving to Internet Explorer, you could check by downloading Google Chrome from the following link... https://www.google.com/intl/en/chrome/browser/

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Hi Bill, I suspect that your icons have accidentally changed size, if this is the case it should be pretty straight forward to get them back to a reasonable size, just follow the instructions below…

1. Boot up your computer normally so that you can see the icons on the desktop 2. Find a space on the desktop that doesn’t have icons on it and right hand click (so you are right hand clicking on the desktop and not on one of the icons) 3. Click View > Medium Icons …that should put your icons back to a normal size.

A

UPDATE: Hi Richard, Right hand click? Blooming heck! easy when you know how! All back to normal now. Thank you sir.

Robert Barnes.

ADVICE: David wanted to know how to change the font in the new replacement for Hotmail, Microsoft Outlook

Q

Good afternoon Mr.Cavender. Many thanks for your informative notes in the Courier. Perhaps you can help me. I noted today that you discussed default fonts in Hotmail. Please tell me how I can get a default font in Outlook Hotmail too which I have just converted. Am I missing something very obvious?

Thanks in anticipation, Kind regards, David

A

Hi David, you should login to your email and click the following…

1. From the inbox screen click the gear icon in the top right hand corner of the

screen 2. Click “More Email Settings” 3. Under “Writing Email” click “Message Font and Signature” 4. Choose the font settings you would prefer and click Save …hope that helps.

Update: Many thanks for your reply. Much appreciated ­something about wood and trees comes to mind ­ apart from senility!!

Friday, September 6, 2013

19

20

Friday, September 6, 2013

MEDICAL ASTROLOGY: WHAT IS IT AND HOW DOES IT WORK? When one thinks of astrology, the study of stars and their interpretations into human characters (star signs) come to mind. While medical astrology won't give you an update on your star sign or an indication of what is going to happen in your love life or career, it can help to deter­ mine strengths and weaknesses within the human body.

Furthermore, medical astrologers can also pinpoint the state of a disease or pick up things like nutritional defi­ ciencies and healthy considerations by simply studying and analyzing your medical astrology chart or natal chart.

Medical astrology all works according to the influence of the sun, the moon, the stars and planets as well as the twelve signs of the zodiac: Capricorn, Aquarius, Pisces, Aries, Gemini, Taurus, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio and Sagittarius. It is basically a code that has been developed to associate specific astrological elements and planets with various regions of the body.

When looking at medical astrology and the star signs, the human body is segmented into twelve levels, each one representing a specific astrological sign or star sign.

If you were to look at the body from head to toe, it would be sliced up, with the first sign of the zodiac on top (Aries) and the last sign of the zodiac (Pisces) at the bot­ tom. Each level represents different body regions: The head, brain, face and eyes would be repre­ sented by Aries.

The neck and throat, as well as the thyroid gland and vocal tract would be represented by Taurus.

The shoulders, arms, hands and lungs would be represented by Gemini, as would the nervous sys­ tem and the brain.

The chest and breasts, stomach and alimentary canal would be represented by Cancer.

The chest, heart, spine, spinal column and the upper portion of the back would be represented by Leo. The digestive system, together with the intestines, nervous system and spleen would be represented by

The reproductive system, together with the sexual organs in both male and female, would be represent­ ed by Scorpio. This sign also represents the excreto­ ry system and bowels.

The hips and thighs as well as the liver and sciatic nerve, which is the longest and widest single nerve in the body, would be represented by Sagittarius.

The skeletal system, which includes the joints and the knees, would be represented by Capricorn.

The circulatory system as well as the calves and ankles would be represented by Aquarius.

Virgo.

The lumbar region or lower region of the spine would be represented by Libra, as would the kidneys, buttocks and the skin.

The planets are also associated with certain portions and functions within the body. For example, the Sun rep­ resents the heart, spine and general vitality, while Mars represents the muscles, adrenal glands and the sense of smell and taste.

A qualified and competent medical astrologer is able to draw up a natal chart based on the date, month and year of birth, time of birth and place of birth. He would then typ­ ically analyze the chart to identify strengths and weak­ nesses within certain areas of the body. Using the twelve zodiac signs as well as the planets, medical astrologers can also identify the possibility and tendency towards var­ ious diseases and their states, as well as pick up nutrition­ al deficiencies.

A session with a medical astrologer would most likely be required by individuals who either have a specific dis­ ease, a hereditable condition or for general health and understanding how the influence of astrology can lead to a better quality of life.

Medical astrologers have also been used to help patients determine the exact time of an operation for an optimum and successful outcome.

Although medical astrology can help to identify the workings of an individual's human body, it is always advis­ able to get a medical consultation before attempting treat­ ment, and medical astrology should merely be used as a guide to good health.

DRUG PUSHERS IN WHITE COATS About a hundred years ago, the field of medicine was home to several distinct and competing medical philosophies: natural, homeopathic, osteopathy, chiropractic, and allopathic. These schools of thought were in open conflict and routinely criticised each other for errors. This created intense compe­ tition between them, and that way they kept each other in check, to the benefit of the public. Natural practitioners believed in treating the body using just natural sub­ stances, while homeopaths believed that only the tiniest doses of chemicals should be employed to heal the body. Allopathic or modern medicine on the other hand was the exact opposite of homeopathy, and recom­ mended the use of strong doses of chemi­ cals to treat diseases. History has it that most people kept away from allopathic prac­ titioners because they killed more people than they cured. But their luck changed when John D Rockefeller – who was looking for new markets for his crude oil empire – reformed healthcare institutions with the allopathic model of medicine as their foun­ dation. As an allopathic doctor, I certainly recognise his immense contribution to the welfare of humanity through his transforma­ tion of the health system; however an arm of that system – the pharmaceutical industry – now has a near total choke hold on humani­ ty. Of course drugs have their benefits, especially in emergency situations, but as all doctors are taught in their first lesson in

DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

pharmacology, every drug is a poison. Drugs produce an effect in the body mainly by blocking or enhancing the production of enzymes, or by attaching themselves to cel­ lular receptors in a fashion similar to the lock and key mechanism. What this means is that drugs are mostly able to alleviate a symptom, but not treat the cause of the symptom. For example, when doctors detect high blood pressure in a patient, they usually would prescribe anti­hypertensive tablets, without considering the cause of the hyper­ tension such as poor nutrition, hormonal dis­ orders, chronic diseases, presence of con­ taminants, stress etc. And to compound issues, there are huge flaws with the princi­ ples of drug science. To illustrate, depres­ sion is commonly treated with a class of drugs known as SSRI’s (Selective Serotonin Re­uptake Inhibitors) and drugs in this class work by preventing the reuse and flooding the brain with serotonin – the feel good hor­ mone. The problem with this line of thinking is that serotonin receptors are not only found in the brain, but also in the intestines and the bones. In fact 90% of all serotonin in the body is in the intestines. One of the main ‘side effects’ of SSRI’s such as Prozac, is weight gain. But the so called side effects of medication are really not side effects, but

unwanted effects. To put it differently, Prozac could have been used for the purpose of helping people put on weight, and its mood lifting effect on the brain would have been a side effect. Human beings are very vulnera­ ble when sick, and this is especially true

when we are in pain, and want an immediate end to our suffering. And the drug industry and their glorified reps – doctors are aware of their power over you. Because it is all about profit, and it pays the drug industry to treat symptoms rather than cause, your doc­ tor will continue to push drugs to you.

FOR FULL BODY DIAGNOSTICS CALL DR MACHI MANNU: 965071745

Friday, September 6, 2013

21

HOW TO FIND THE BEST MULTIVITAMIN

Q A

I want to start taking vitamins and minerals, but I am confused because there are so many different types available. What should I take?

In an ideal world, you will get all your nutrients form your diet, but unfortunately, the food we eat today does not deliver as much nutrients as it did years ago, and so we need to take supplements for optimal health. Supplements are an easy way to ensure that your body gets all the essen­ tial nutrients it needs on a daily basis. Some critics will tell you otherwise, but they are very wrong. Several studies have shown that the foods we eat foods no longer contain as much nutrients as they did years ago. Supplements include – vitamins, minerals, antioxidants, phytonutrients, aminoacids, essential fatty acids as well as numerous oth­ ers. With such a list, it is very easy to get confused about what to take. Your best bet is to start with a really compre­ hensive multivitamin, one that contains more or less all essential nutrients. Finding a good multivitamin isn’t an easy task. When I started looking into vitamins and supplement, it took me a while of analysing many brands using our advanced computerised system­ Sensitiv Imago­ before I settled for the brand we know use exclusively in our clinic­ Ultrapreventive X from Douglas Laboratories. This award winning multi­vitamin is on a class of its own, mainly because it is packed with so many essential nutrients, and also due to the exceptional quality and purity of its ingredi­ ents. Supplements differ mainly in the type of active ingredi­ ent they contain, as well as the way they are formulated.

Good quality supplements will usually contain the best form of the active ingredient, which is usually the form in which that ingredient is best absorbed into the body. High quality supplement makers will also avoid the synthetic forms of nutrients preferring to use the natural forms, which are not only better for the body, but in some cases can be radically different with the synthetic forms causing unwanted health problems. Other differences lie in the other ingredients used to make supplements such as fillers, binders and expedi­ ents. High quality nutrients such as those from Douglas lab­

oratories tend to avoid these were possible, and if not use the tiniest amounts. What’s also important to remember is that taking single nutrient vitamins such as taking only Vitamin A or Vitamin B12 or Zinc is not such a good idea because one can easily overdose on certain nutrients that way. Furthermore, nutrients are better absorbed when taken as a combination of nutrients, like in natural foods, and not as single nutrients. Ultrapreventive X is available from MedB health store: 90 tablets for 53.11 Euros or 180 tablets for 95.11 Euros. And the recommended dose is between 2 and 4 tablets daily. Delivery is free to Spain. Call 965071745 Last year in March, I started having pains in my lower left leg. I went to the salud and the doctor pre­ scribed pain killers which didn’t help at all. Then some­ time in March I was hospitalized because I had very severe chest pains and was unconscious for many days. The hospital later found out that I had clots in my leg. I was discharged from hospital unable to walk with­ out support. I don’t have pain in my legs, but feel a bit off balance when I try to walk. I am a 75 year old woman, and I take tablets for blood pressure. I will appreciate any advice you can give.

It’s unfortunate your doctor missed the blood clot in your leg. From your history, it appears the clot from the lower leg eventually found its way to your heart and brain causing the symptoms that led to your hospital admission. Blood clots in the legs are usually caused by atherosclerosis, the medical term for hardening and narrowing of the arteries due to plaque build­up. Atherosclerosis can develop in any of the arteries of the body; however it commonly occurs in the arteries that supply blood to the heart and brain. When these arteries are blocked, a heart attack or stroke occurs. The hospital will have prescribed blood thinners such as aspirin or warfarin to prevent future recurrences of the clot. It is still unclear if these medications are useful for preventing blood clots. Aspirin has been shown to damage the kidney and liver at doses above 100 mgs daily. The difficulty you are

Q

A

having with walking is probably due to brain damage from the possible stroke you suffered. This type of minor damage is known as a neurological deficit, and it means that an area of the brain has been damaged. In such cases, the only use­ ful treatment is a regenerative therapy to rebuild the dam­ aged area. The good news is that nerve tissues can regen­ erate if adequately supported. Laminine is a unique supple­ ment that supports regeneration of nerve tissues as well as other tissues. It stands alone because it is the only supple­ ment available that contains Fibroblast Growth Factor (FGF) – a protein that stimulates the growth of reserve or stem cells. These reserve cells or fibroblasts are found in the heart, nerves, brain, bone marrow and muscle tissues. In other words, the FGF contained in Laminine helps our body repair itself. Laminine also contains all 22 essential amino acids. These amino acids are known as essential because we need them but our bodies cannot make them, and so we can only get them from food. Amino acids are vital for mak­ ing DNA and other genetic materials, and so are referred to as the building blocks of life. Our skin, muscles, hair and many organs are mainly built from amino acids. We receive amino acids by digesting proteins from plant and animal food. But as we age, the entire digestive system may become dysfunctional, leading to poor digestion and absorp­ tion. Many studies have shown a reduction in the absorption of amino acids in the elderly. Without amino acids our bod­ ies are unable to repair the damage that occurs from the everyday wear and tear of our organs which leads to many diseases that we have come to associate with ageing espe­ cially disorders of the heart and brain. Laminine contains readymade amino acids that are absorbed straight into the body for repairing damaged organs. Amino acids also help detoxify the body. To find out more about Laminine call Susan on 627371731. Laminine is available from MedB health shop – 36 Euros for 30 capsules, free delivery. Call 965071745 PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO : contact@medb.es or to the editor of the courier.

22

Friday, September 6, 2013

23

Friday, September 6, 2013

Tony

Mayes

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

COUNCILS AND SOPPY COPS ARE A JOKE

The travelling communities in Britain have been caus­ ing problems for residents, farmers and councils all summer, and the latest trouble spot is on recre­ ation land in Brighton.

But the latest episode there has shown once again how weak and ineffectual Britain has become. The city council installed a barrier with a padlock across the entrance to the park after removing a group of trav­ ellers in early summer (they may have been the same travellers who troubled us too). But the travellers kept driving over pavements and the artificial mounds to try to get in, so the soppy police told the council about the problem and equally soppy council officials opened the gate "because of health and safety concerns to reduce the risk to road users".

But by opening the gates and letting the good­for­ nothings in, police lost all powers to evict them straight away. And now the council has to go through the usual crass nonsense of a long and costly process through the courts to try to evict them. Oh for a government that cracks down on low­life which thinks it can run around the country causing mayhem wherever it goes and living without pay­ ing rent, rates and other taxes which everyone else has to pay. Wouldn't I love to get the addresses of all the namby­pamby MPs, support­ ers of human rights and all the other soft soapers and put all the country's low life camped all around them?

Perhaps then they would get the message and put an end to it, giving the police the powers they need to sort out the rubbish which the rest are keeping either on bene­ fits or allowing them to live

even stranger with their President Hollande prepared to take action, despite 80 per cent of his country being against it, thereby making this increasingly unpopular Socialist president look utter­ ly ridiculous. A final thought on this sorry tale (and this came from my wife) ­ what if, sometime in the future, Britain had its back against the wall and the rest of the world looked the other way?

What then Miliband?

I’m sure you know how much every council in Britain loves painting yellow lines everywhere with a view to try to drive motorists into car parks where they have to pour money into their coffers.

Well, here are two exam­ ples of councils which have workers with yellow lines on (or have damaged) their brains! Cumbria Council Council has admitted its workers made a 'ridiculous' mistake after it put double yellow lines across a busy T­ junction. They painted a no­ parking zone right across the entrance to the Workington Community Hospital ­ wait for it ­ because they were using maps from before it was built. Furious drivers and tax­payers have said it is an 'embarrassment' and a 'waste of cash' because the

q

without paying their way.

q

Imagine you are a wit­ ness to a vicious rob­ bery or a racist attack hap­ pening near you. Do you muster as many bystanders as you can and weigh in and put an end to it? Or do you turn the other way, cross the street and pretend it doesn't exist, and hope it doesn't happen to you some time in the future? Well, the latter is just what Britain did over the Syrian chemical weapons attack. In effect, what Britain was saying, was that you can get on with it, attack each other with no matter what weapons you have at your disposal, and Britain will do nothing. And it's all thanks to that snake in the grass Miliband, the wonderful Labour turncoat, and a Prime Minister who didn't handle the situation properly.

OK, it's all very well to judge in hindsight, but

Cameron should have waited before having the debate in Parliament at least until there was as much compelling evi­ dence as possible that the Assad regime was responsi­ ble for turning chemical weapons on its own people.

Initially he fell into the same trap as Tony Blair over the Iraq war. Just 24 hours later, the American government produced far more evidence of Assad’s guilt. Shame that the Americans did not see fit to put Cameron in the pic­ ture. It might have been what was needed to convince the majority in the House. And as for Miliband ­ it does him and his wretched party no credit at all, to first make all the sig­ nals that they would support limited action against Syria, and, at the last moment, to pull the rug from under Cameron and leave him totally exposed. That's the sort of dirty tricks politics which not only does the party

concerned no credit ­ it also damages the country. If that’s what Britain wants as its next government, then heaven help us!

I can well understand the argument that Britain is always the little poodle that does America's bidding virtu­ ally without question. But Britain cannot be a world leader if it does not stand up and be counted when the need arises. I have no doubt that some countries would have viewed Britain as a laughing stock after last week's Commons vote. As Paddy Ashdown said last week: ­ "A sad day for Britain." The last thing the West wants to do is to so weaken Assad and allow the rebels, which include extreme Islamist groups to gain the upper hand.

But Assad's regime can­ not be left unpunished either. Isn't it also sad that the Arab world cannot police itself and put an end to sectarian strife in countries in that region?

The Arab League should be the policeman there, not the English (and French) speaking West.

All it does is to give the Islamist extremists the focus to launch more ter­ rorist attacks on Western countries.

Sadly, with Muslims pitted against each other, Shia V Sunni, secular v religious, rich and poor and left and right, there's precious little chance of peace for a very long time.

Thankfully, Obama decid­ ed to go the same way as Britain and decide to ask Congress to vote before any decision to strike Syria. It makes the French position

Council will have to get them removed. One said: "It looks like a child had done it. It is that poor that perhaps the painter was under the influ­ ence or suffering from the fumes given off the paint."

Taxi driver Ray Cottier said he's been driving around Workington since he was 17 and he's never come across anything as peculiar. "The lines have gone right across the junction ­ I've never seen

anything like it before," he said. And as a final act of stupidity from the council, they now admit that it could take weeks before they can get the lines removed. It’s a pity the council can't remove itself at the same time. Now that would be progress!

My other dumb authority is Westminster Council, whose contractors decided to paint 9 inch double yellow lines squeezed between a taxi rank and some parking bays.

Apart from toy cars I can't think of any which can park there! The council say the lines are ridiculous and will go ­ at taxpayers' expense no doubt.

The UK papers have been highlighting the fact that many private hospi­ tal patients were paying too much for their treatment because of a lack of compe­ tition. This is information from a survey from the Competition Commission.

Well, it's a real shame, isn't it? My heart bleeds for these people who use their money to jump medical queues and are paying too much for the privilege. Actually, in the main, it is insurance compa­ nies who are paying the price, because many private patients are these days financed by private health insurance. But consider this?

If it wasn't for the rich who can opt out of the NHS and go private, the NHS would be so much better. Why? People with money and position will ensure that they get the treatment and care and, in the process, will bring the standards of the NHS up. It's this "choice", allowing people to opt out of the NHS, which strangles it of the resources it needs. Of course, if those who would have gone private went onto the NHS, it would increase the num­ ber of patients being treat­ ed and increase costs, but if the rich and "great and good" were forced into the NHS, they would ensure the money, resources and manpower were there to care for them, and, in the process, for everyone else too. Politicians are always banging on about giving peo­ ple choices, but so often choice depends on the ability to pay. And you could use the same argument in education too ­ how much better would schools be if the rich great and good had to see their children educated in state schools? Far more likely a dumbing up than a dumbing down, methinks.

q

24

Friday, September 6, 2013

You will go to the ball Big George charms all The cancer fund­raising charity of Maria and The Pink Ladies are getting their posh frocks out for their annual “End of Summer Ball” next Friday (September 13th).

The Campoamor Golf Club will be hosting the event which is a masked ball priced at just 30 Euros per head, with all the proceeds going to AECC(Contra el Cancer).

Your ticket will get you a 3 course meal with drinks, as well as a cocktail on the ter­ race when you arrive and access to the free fun casino

with prizes. There’s live entertainment and a disco as well, with the whole night starting at 7pm.

There are just a few tick­ ets left, so you can call Maria on 633 487 595 or send an E­mail to info@pin­ kladies.es The following day, the Flabelos Vibra Gym at the Filton Centre, Los Balcones is staging a Family Fun Day in aid of The Pink Ladies.

There’ll be lots of entertain­ ing and a BBQ running from midday.

Maria Wilson is also look­ ing for more volunteers to

help at the AECC office in Torrevieja, with a commit­ ment of just one morning a week between 10.00am and 1.00pm No experience is needed, as full training will be given.

A man’s best friend is ever better when he or she are brought to heel, and for the last 13 years, the Campoverde Canine Club has been running their popular obedience class­ es.

In their last set of presentations and class­ es at the Polideportivo Sports Ground at Pinar de Campoverde, there were some remarkable stories and achievements.

The winner of the Basic Class was Paul Canfield and his dog Samson, whilst Frances Getgood and Billy took the Advanced Category. One big story came in the Intermediate Section, featuring Doug Oxlade and George(pictured). They only won the Basic Class title a few months ago, and it shows how all the training has seen the big­hearted George rise to all the chal­ lenges.

Find your feet with Footwork

Dancing in all shapes and sizes and for all tastes from all ages was on dis­ play in the recent Footwork Dance Summer Revue.

The event at the Los Montesinos Music School had everything on show taking in ballet, jazz, tap, and acrobatics! There was also a display of Tai Chi, in addition to a real West End musical atmosphere.

The autumn term at Footwork has just started, and they after new stu­ dents with a variety of interests. All kinds of dance classes are on offer for young and old, as well as singing and drama coaching, in addition to new adult classes in yoga and pilates.

All of the classes are fun, but are taught professionally in a relaxing atmosphere, where everybody is treated as an individual.

Besides producing shows during the year to support local charities, Footwork Dance also take part in fiestas, competitions and also enter students for dance exams each year.

New courses will start on Saturday October 5th, and for more details phone Roy on 966 762 265 or E­mail:­ taffthedog@hot­ mail.com

HELP AGE CONCERN

Age Concern’s drop­in centre in Torrevieja is back open again after the summer break. The centre on Calle Paganini in La Siesta is open on weekdays between 10.00am and 1.30pm.

The group is urgent need of donations of items that they can sell to raise funds or to hand over to people that need them. The charity is also keen for any clubs or fund­raising societies that would consider adopting Age Concern (Costa Blanca South) as something that they would support in 2014.

For more details, pop in to the Centre at La Siesta, or phone 966 786 887

More hopeful

A unique group in the Murcia region is looking to care for the carers who look after their partners who suffer from Alzheimer’s and similar diseases.

For more details, phone 662 137 329 or E­mail:­ foot­ The Hopefuls meet on a regular basis in the San Javier workdance@hotmail.com, or just pop into their Los area to provide support as well as just having a good fun get­ Montesinos studio on Calle Carlos Diez 17D. together. The new group believe that Alzheimer’s and other dementias need to be urgently catered for by the local authorities with the number of sufferers on the rise in the Mar Menor area. The Hopefuls want greater recognition for such dreadful diseases that need to be recognised, which cause huge strain and stress for the carers, most of whom receive no help at all.

The group will be meeting this Tuesday lunchtime (September 10th) at 11.30am in Lui’s lounge at the San Javier Campsite for a drink and a chat. You can stay on and have some lunch, as well as shooting a game of pool or play­ ing cards and dominoes. The get­together’s now take place every alternate Tuesday.

If you want to join The Hopefuls, then phone 968 185 008 or 667 587 187

Adapt strike DAY OF PLENTY gold!

It may have seemed like the proverbial needle in a haystack, but a local group has found a ring on a beach, after an appeal from a dis­ traught lady!

The ADAPT Metal Detecting club were gathering on Los Alcazares beach when the unhappy woman approached them and told them that she had lost her wedding ring in the water a month earlier. She gave a full description of it and despite it being something of a long­ shot, the club members decid­ ed to start a search in the sea.

After an hour, one of the team members, Sylvie, picked up a noise from her headphones which suggested a small metal object, and incredibly it was the missing ring!

Still dripping wet, Sylvie telephoned the woman’s son with the good news, and he arrived within minutes to pick up the ring. The ADAPT Metal Detecting Group work to a strict code of conduct and provide a free rescue and recovery of lost metal items (subject to conditions). You get more information

by E­mailing Roderick Toms at r.toms@btinternet.com or via the ADAPT website, www.adaptsanpedro.eu

El Raso’s Bar Sofia is hosting a fun walk next weekend, to raise money for research into Crohn’s Disease. They’ll be supporting the CICRA charity, who in turn support young sufferers of Crohn’s, with the 5km walk on Sunday September 15th. The walk will be to the lake and back, starting at 10.00am, with registration underway from 9.15am.

The registration fee will be 5 Euros per walker, but any extra sponsorship money will be gratefully received!

There’s also going to be a 500 metre “Baby” walk which takes in the lasts section of the full walk route. Free drinks will be available at The Old Finca before the last leg of the walk, and that will also the base for the fun Treasure Hunt which will be open to walkers and non­ walkers!

There’s also a free to enter competition based around the song, “Walk Right In And Sit Right Down”. All you need to do is to E­Mail sueinthesun@hotmail.co.uk with the name of the original artist or the group that had a hit with the song in the early sixties. Prizes include meals and healing sessions!

Let no one forget The 73rd anniversary of the Battle of Britain will be commemorated a week tomorrow (Saturday September 14th) by the Costa Blanca branch of the Royal Air Forces Association. The many sacrifices made during the campaign of 1940 will be recalled dur­ ing a Service of Commemoration and Thanksgiving at La Siesta Church, Torrevieja, starting at 11am.

Prime Minister, Sir Winston Churchill uttered these famous words:­“The gratitude of every home in our Island, in the Empire and indeed throughout the World. goes out to the airmen, who undaunted by odds, unwearied in their constant challenge and mortal dan­ ger, are turning the tide of world war by their prowess and by their devotion. Never in the field of human con­ flict was so much owed by so many to so few' The Association is keen that no one should forget what was sacrificed in a vital battle against tyranny in 1940.

Friday, September 6, 2013

25

UNDER STARTER’S ORDERS A Torrevieja bar had a race night with a difference: ­ a real horse popped up in their fund­ raiser for the Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre in Rojales.

Ken and Jan Keely at Kenz Bar in San Luis have support­ ed the centre for many years, and so as a thank­you and despite some dodgy weather, the popular miniature horse Taffeta made a special appearance, wearing her new coat which was made from the same material used for the Team GB equestrian team from the 2012 Olympics. This was the sixth Race Night that Ken and Jan have hosted this year and they have already booked two more for the next

two months.

“We really enjoy hosting these nights as it is something different for our customers to enjoy and everyone can join in” said Ken. “Jan and myself feel it is important to help wor­ thy causes such as The Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre and to be able to do this and have a great night at the same time makes it all the more enjoyable”.

Last year Kenz Bar raised 1 thousand Euros for the Centre and this year they are well on their way to doubling that.

David Feest from EHCRC said “Ken and Jan have become great personal friends over the years that I have lived in Spain. When I

first approached them about hosting these nights for our charity they could not have been more eager and helpful.

These race nights are a great chance for us to get our mes­ sage across to the public about what we do and raise awareness and funds for our work”.

If you run a bar or know somebody that wants to host one of these events you can contact David on 639 781 528 or email him at admin@easy­ horsecare.net The last word must go to Ken. “It was great to meet Taffeta but he tips she gave me were useless. So much for straight from the horse’s mouth!”

TEENAGERS IN LOVE Remembering David A tireless worker for local charity will be remembered in a special fund­ raiser for the Help at Home organisa­ tion at the end of the month. David Bennett died last September having been in the forefront of organising many events for charities around the Orihuela Costa. In memory of David, his partner Mikki asked for a special event in aid of Help at Home, and that

It’s 60 not out for Quesada couple, Roy and Mary Casnello, who toasted their diamond wedding anniversary with a party this week, and a letter of congratulations from The Queen.

The couple met at a dance when they were teenagers in Birmingham and married on Mary’s 20th birthday. They retired to Spain over 11 years ago, after Roy ran a furniture busi­ ness, whilst Mary worked as an office manager at Cadbury’s world famous Bournville head­ quarters.

The Casnello’s have two sons, and Roy these days enjoys playing golf and short mat bowls in Daya Nueva. Mary spends some of her time working for the Paul Cunningham Nurses shop in Quesada.

“There’s absolutely no way that Roy could ever forget our anniversary with it falling on my birthday”, joked Mary.

FUN BUT SERIOUS

If you are a lady who can hold a note, then the Cantabile female choir would love to hear from you!

The group rehearse every Friday afternoon at La Siesta Church in Torrevieja, and they’ll be busy as from today (September 6th) getting ready for Christmas!

Musical director, Jennifer Morton, and vocal coach, Patricia Flint enjoy working with a friendly and sociable group of ladies who take their music seriously. Cantabile’s mem­ bers are mainly British, but there are a few Scandinavians and a Belgian thrown in for good measure! They also sing in many lan­ guages including Spanish and Latin.

Their repertoire varies from reli­ gious and classi­ cal though to tradi­ tional, folk and popular songs and Jennifer produces training CDs to help the ladies learn the music.

They perform at least two major concerts each year, and next spring, their programme will include Tales of the Vienna Woods by Johann Strauss.

Cantabile’s concerts have raised modest but important sums for local charities. If you are interested in joining the choir, please contact Jennifer Morton on 966 796 866 or E­mail jen­morton@hotmail.co.uk You can also learn more by looking at the Cantabile website:­ www.cantabilesingers.es

will be staged at the Red Sea Café on Calle San Antonio, La Zenia on Sunday September 29th.

A Grand Bazaar, starting at 4pm, will feature a variety of stalls selling items from 4.00pm, followed by a supper together with live entertain­ ment from Andreas and a raffle draw.

Tickets for the evening are just 5 Euros.

26

Friday, September 6, 2013

UK HEADLINES

A DOG’S DINNER IT'S definitely a dog's life for taste tester Lucy Postins after landing a job sampling bowls of pet food, but at least she is guaranteed strong teeth and a nice shiny coat.

While the mere thought of eating dog food is enough to turn most people's stomachs, Ms Postins, originally from the UK but now based in San Diego, USA, says she absolutely loves her job.

Ms Postins, 38, not only samples every individual ingredient that goes into the food but even chows down on the final product ­ to make sure it tastes just right.

Ms Postins insists on all the recipes being made in a human food facility instead of a pet food rendering plant, and then tests for the likes of flavour, aroma and colour which is an indication of freshness.

Her company The Honest Kitchen was the first pet food manufacturer to achieve a 'human grade' rating from the FDA (U.S. Food and Drug Administration) which means the final product is legally allowed to be described as 'human grade' on the product labels.

This is because the ingredients are sourced directly from the human food chain and production takes place alongside 'people foods'.

Lucy, who studied in Warwickshire, believes that by pro­

ducing pet food in this way animals receive stacks of health benefits including improvements to their skin, fur and gener­ al immunity.

The dog food ­ which includes everything from free range chicken, ranch­raised beef and sweet potatoes to eggs, bananas and even dandelion greens ­ is carefully blended

Egyptian man arrests swan

THE suspected winged infiltrator was taken to a police station in the Qena governorate, 280 miles southeast of Cairo, amid increasing fears over foreign spies. Officials said the man suspected the bird was an undercover agent because it carried an electronic device.

Mohammed Kamal, head of security in Qena, said that officials examined the bird and the device, but found neither explosives nor a spy­ ing device. It was thought likely to be a wildlife tracker.

With turmoil gripping Egypt, authorities and citi­ zens remain suspicious of anything foreign. Earlier this year, a security guard filed a police report after capturing a pigeon he said carried microfilm reels.

It is not just in Egypt that animals can be detained for

spying.

In July a kestrel was detained in Turkey on suspi­ cion of being an Israeli spy.

In 2010 the country's author­ ities also faced scrutiny after Egyptian officials claimed they had sent sharks to kill

tourists.

Saudi Arabi arrested a vulture in 2011, believing the animal to be working for Mossad, the Israeli secret service.

And far fetched as it may seem, some people believe

that the CIA is actively exploring how to "recruit" animals into service.

"What the agency wanted was a remote­controlled bug that could be steered to within five meters of a tar­ get," wrote Emily Anthes in Frankenstein's Cat: Cuddling up to Biotech's Brave New Beasts, which was published in March.

"Ultimately, the insects would also need to carry surveillance equipment, such as microphones, cam­ eras, or gas sensors, and to transmit whatever data they collected back to military officials.

"The pamphlet outlined one specific application for the robo­bugs – outfitted with chemical sensors, they could be used to detect traces of explosives in remote buildings or caves."

before being mixed with water by the buyer to help bring the mixture together.

CEO Lucy, whose family includes two pet Rhodesian Ridgebacks and a Pug in San Diego in California, USA, said: 'There are a lot of people who think their pets are inferior and don't deserve quality food.

'But so many people are becoming educated on con­ ventional pet food ingredients and production that they want to make a move away from that.

'By actually tasting the food ourselves I think it's a sound way of walking our own talk and helping to assure people we actually mean what we say about product integrity and quality.

'Some of my friends think it's an odd thing to do but most of them have pets they love as much as ­ or in some cases maybe even more than ­ their own chil­ dren so can see where I'm coming from.

'A recent 2013 survey showed 74 percent of cus­ tomers saw an improvement in the well­being and energy levels of their pets from eating the products.

'And 70 per cent saw an improvement in their pet's skin and coat while 60 per cent noticed an improvement in their pets' weight.

'The proof really is in the pudding and our foods are good enough to eat.'

Testicle-eating fish heading for UK A testicle­eating fish nicknamed the "ball­cutter" could be swimming towards the UK after being found in French waters.

The razor­toothed pacu fish, which has been known to bite off male swimmers' testicles, was spotted in the River Seine in Paris.

French police took a photo of the beast normally found in the Amazon, and said it measured 1ft.

The South American species was also seen in Sweden last month when a fisherman hooked an eight­inch specimen in the Oresund Sound, and promped a warning to men to keep their trunks on when heading for a dip.

The pacu can grow up in 35in and weigh up to 55lb in their natural habitat in the Amazon basin and Papau New Guinea.

They are very similar to a piranha fish, but have flatter, stronger teeth designed for crushing, and fisherman have reportedly bled to death after having their testicles bitten off.

Fish expert Henrik Carl said the pacu was not normally dangerous to people but it has got "quite a serious bite".

He said: "There have been incidents in other countries such as Papau New Guinea, where some men have had their testicles bitten off."

"They bite because they're hungry, and testicles sit nicely in their mouth."

"It normally eats nuts, fruit and small fish, but human testi­ cles are just a natural target."

Friday, September 6, 2013

UK HEADLINES

27

BULGER KILLER 'WILL OFFEND AGAIN' THE father of James Bulger has hit out after one of his son's killers was released from prison for a second time and declared he believes he will offend again.

Jon Venables, 31 was freed from prison after being locked up in 2010 for downloading images of child abuse. Legal sources confirmed Venables had been released.

Venables had previously served eight years for murdering two­year­old James in Livepool in 1993. The killer has reportedly been given his fourth new identity at a reported cost of £250,000.

James's father, Ralph, believes Venables will commit more crime, a friend said. "He hasn't put a time on it but he is convinced he will reoffend," she said.

She added that James's family were given scant informa­ tion about Venables' release and Mr Bulger was told via his lawyer. "As ever they are kept in the dark. They don't explain the terms of his release, I don't know whether they are going to. But I don't think Venables can enter Merseyside, however ­ that was one of the conditions which he repeatedly broke before."

The toddler's mother, Denise Fergus, told the Sun

The Mirror

Venables is "a danger to the public".

"He lies for his own sick ends," she said. "I have been told that the terms of his parole mean that he must not enter the county of Merseyside. But the Probation Service didn't mon­ itor him properly last time so I have no faith in their ability to do that now. They should've kept him locked up for a long time."

Venables was just 10 years old when he and his friend, Robert Thompson, tortured and murdered James after abducting him from a shopping centre in Bootle.

A Ministry of Justice spokeswoman said: "We do not com­ ment on individual offenders. The re­release of life licensed offenders is directed by the independent Parole Board once they are satisfied they can be safely managed in the com­ munity.

"Their life licence lasts for the rest of their lives, and they may be recalled to prison at any time for breaching their licence conditions. Additionally, they will be subject to strict controls and restrictions for as long as their risk requires them."

BRITISH 'THRILL-SEEKERS' ARRESTED IN PORTUGAL

TWO British tourists have been arrested in Portugal after friends hired a firm to kidnap them as part of a 40th birthday party stunt.

With echoes of 1997 movie thriller The Game, police raced into action on Sunday afternoon after a string of pan­ icked 999 calls about an abduction hap­ pening in Lisbon's Restauradores Square.

Terrified callers said they had seen masked men forcing two women into a white van before speeding off, and detec­ tives sent several cars for the chase.

But it was only when they stopped the van that they realised the two women were in fact part of an elaborate fake kid­ nap, planned to spice up their birthday celebrations.

The party was soon brought to an abrupt halt when the pair were arrested along with four Portuguese nationals, thought to be the owner of the unnamed firm and three other men involved in the abduc­ tion.

Cops have taken away the vehicle used in the fake kidnap and a video used to

film the experience.

The six were due to appear in court yes­ terday on suspicion of "criminal simula­ tion" ­ a crime which can carry a maxi­ mum one­year prison sentence ­ but police said today the women had insisted they had no idea they were going to be kidnapped, and blamed friends on the trip for organising the scare.

A police spokesman said: "It will be up to the courts to decide who's telling the truth.

"The two birthday women were arrested

because a crime was being simulated and they were there.

"It may be that a court will decide to take no further action against them and goes after their friends but that is a decision for the court and not something we can comment on."

None of the people arrested have been named, but they are thought to be aged between 27 and 40. The women are believed to have flown to Portugal with a group of nine friends to celebrate their 40th birthdays.

Extreme kidnapping is the latest thrill for adrenaline junkies, who pay up to £1,000 to be abducted.

Customers of French firm Ultime Realite can buy a basic abduction package in which they are seized by strangers, bound and gagged before being bundled into a car and kept in a dark cellar for hours.

Tailor­made elements of the experience include boat chases and helicopter escapes.

Customers explain what they want and once the scenario is established, they sign a contract and liability waiver but have no idea exactly when or where their abductors will strike.

Ultime Realite's website promises: "You will go through the real sensations of vio­ lence, terror and fear of a real kidnapping ­ a psychological shock that you won't forget in a hurry."

The service echoes the 1997 thriller The Game starring Michael Douglas, in which the protagonist is trapped in a real­life 'game' organised by a shadowy group called Consumer Recreation Services.

28

Friday, September 6, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

HAPPY DAYS WILL ARE WE THERE YET? BE HERE AGAIN A couple who left their three young chil­ dren in a locked car in the heat in order to go to the beach have been arrested in Benalmádena. The 48 year old father, and 39 year old mother, had left them with no ventilation or water during the hottest part of the day.

A member of the public saw the young­ sters shut in the car in a car park near the beach and unable to escape, sweating pro­ fusely and feeling dizzy, which put them all at serious risk of heat­stroke. This was at

around 2.45pm on Wednesday last week, but the news was only released this week.

Firefighters were called out and cut the chil­ dren free from the vehicle, then traced the parents, who were arrested.

Police say the children did not want to go to the beach, insisting they went to another one where they could hire a pedalo, resulting in a family argument and the parents saying, “well, you can stay in the car, then.”

The nationality of the family has not been revealed.

A new and stricter Abortion Law is set to be debated in the Spanish Parliament next month. Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy came to power in 2011 promising to change a more liberal abortion law passed the previous year by the then Socialist government.

Rajoy's conservative Popular Party and the Roman Catholic Church have hotly opposed the 2010 abortion law, which allows abortion up to 14 weeks of preg­ nancy or up to 22 weeks if the foetus is deformed. Now the government seems set to return Spain to the earlier 1985 law, which decriminalized abortion only in cases of rape, deformation of the foetus or serious physical or psycho­

logical risks to the mother.

The new law to be presented before the end of October will be "in line with our commitments and with the criteria of the Constitutional Court," Justice Minister Alberto Ruiz Gallardón told the RNE radio station. The Constitutional Court has ratified the 1985 law but has not yet ruled on a Popular Party appeal against the 2010 abortion reform.

Spain's ruling party has agonized over the reform, with the justice minister at one point surprising even members of his own party by saying that a risk to the mother should not be considered as a "pretext for not protecting a new­ born"

A low­flying vulture caused chaos on Sunday, injuring six cyclists after it slammed head first into them.

The cyclists were travelling in a small group in Burgos province when the bird flew into the pack.

"The vulture was flying very low along the centre of the road, and was coming straight at those at the head of the group," the cyclists told El Correo newspaper.

"Some of the group smacked into the wings, others against the bird's body and other into the cyclists behind them,"

explained J a v i e r Sagarribay.

One of the group, Mario Sánchez, was rushed to hos­ pital with seven broken ribs, a fractured shoul­ der blade and collar bone and a punctured lung.

The collision took place on a blind turn with very poor visibility, Sagarribay explained to El Correo. The bird was "trying to take flight and it and we couldn't see it because the curve was so tight," the cyclist said. "We weren't going that fast, but there was no time to hit the brakes."

Abortion changes coming

Spain’s Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy claims that within a year he will be able to announce tax cuts. The PP leader insists that the economy is 'on the way up' and that he 'will not allow anyone or anything to distract' him from working on Spain's financial recovery, 'even though the social­ ists are trying to do the opposite'. Rajoy claims to be 'extremely proud' of how 'Spain can hold its head up high' and has 'become a country on the

way to recovery', having 'won back its credibility and reputation as a sol­ vent country in record time'.

He recalled that just a year ago, rumours were flying round about an EU bailout, but that this has not been mentioned recently.

“Things are still not good, but they are better than they were this time last year,” Rajoy said in a news conference in Galicia.

“My aim is to recover

from the situation the socialists left Spain in, and I guarantee that we are going to recover from it,” Rajoy announced.

He added that the job market is showing signs of recovery already, since more people have found jobs since the start of the summer, and that the number of unemployed persons – which rose from four million to six million between the end of 2011 and the second quarter of 2013 – has gone down by 340,000.

DRIVE OF SHAME

A 64 year old drunken woman ploughed into two cars whilst driving 16 kilome­ tres in the wrong direction down a dual carriageway. The driver from Sabadell near Barcelona refused to be breathal­ ysed when caught travelling against the traffic on the C­35 in the direction of Llagostera in Girona late last Thursday night.

Catalunya's answer to the Guardia Civil, the Mossos d'Esquadra, were called out by another, alarmed driver, and found the accused had crashed into two

oncoming cars when they reached the scene five minutes later. Nobody was hurt in the collision.

The woman is believed to have driven the wrong way down the road all the way from exit 9 of the AP­7 motorway to the site of the accident some 16 kilometres later, or for some eight to 10 minutes.

She was arrested and charged with three offences – dangerous driving, drunk driving and refusing to undergo a breathalysing test when requested by police.

VULTURE ALERT

Friday, September 6, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

29

GAY “CURE” ROW

A gay Spanish man got more than he bargained for when he visited his doctor. Looking for help with his depression, the 25 year old was told that he could be “cured of his homosexuality”, and is now planning to sue her.

Twenty­five year old David Cámara from Jaén told his doctor that he had been vomiting, and that he had been eating little. The openly gay Cámara put this down to a “run of bad luck” over two years which had affected his mental state. But the young chef alleges the doctor then advised him to undergo a battery of tests "because gay couples are prone to all sorts of illnesses".

The doctor told me "I had to understand I was unnat­ ural," Cámara told the Spanish newspaper El Diario.

Cámara also says the doctor told him his problems were in his head and that "homosexuality is a mental disorder that can be treated". Allegedly the doctor blamed all of

Cámara’s physical symptoms on this 'disorder'.

"Haven’t you realized that you are too masculine to get it into your head that you are gay?" the doctor is also alleged

to have asked the young man. At that point, Cámara says he told the female doctor she "wasn't professional enough".

He said the woman was offended and recommended that he see another doctor, but that she was also reticent to refer him on when he tried to take her up on her offer.

Cámara now plans to take legal action against the medical centre in question.

But the local health authority dispute Cámara’s version of events. In a statement, they said that the doctor in ques­ tion had never "treated homosexuality as an illness" and that Cámara had undergone an array of suitable tests based on the symptoms he reported. They also defended the doctor, saying she had followed standard procedures in the consultation and that she had been "respectful" in all of her dealings with Cámara. The authority also denied the doctor viewed homosexuality as an illness.

PULLING A FAST ONE Mum panders to cub

Three Spaniards have built the world's first automatic draft beer dispenser. The "auto­ barman" is the product of four years of hard work by three Granada businessmen who couldn't believe there wasn't a similar model already on the market.

Alfonso Vázquez came up with the idea at a music festival after waiting in long queues to then be served warm beer. "I kept thinking to myself that there had to be a way of short­ ening the wait," Vázquez told the El Mundo newspaper.

"I soon realized how beneficial the auto­ barman could be for a businessman: it serves more beers in less time so there are fewer queues. It doesn't make employees redundant because they can be busy serv­ ing other drinks that cost more money. In fact you create another job because there has to

A new resident of Madrid Zoo has appeared, with the news that a giant panda, who is already the mother of twins, has given birth again.

The mother panda, Hua Zui Ba, delivered the cub after a gestation lasting 131 days. The pink cub, lightly covered in white hair, "cried loudly" on its arrival, the zoo said.

The mother bear took the tiny creature onto its lap within seconds of its be someone changing the machine’s beer birth, licking and protect­ ing it constantly. It was barrels."

The autobarman can store two to four the fourth panda to be casks of beer which are kept cold by a cool­ born in the zoo. Hua Zui ing coil. But the hardest part has been how Ba first gave birth in 2010 to get the dispenser to serve the beer with to twins Po and De De, both of which were taken the right pressure and foam.

May to China's "It's taken us years," says Vázquez. "A in regular barman learns how to serve the right Chengdu province to be released eventually to beer with practice and does it instinctively."

Vázquez plans to sell their device to con­ their natural habitat. cert halls and venues with ticket­only Another panda, Chulin, was born in the zoo in access.

"It won't be available in the street and chil­ 1982.

The cub will not be dren won't have access to it," he added.

Although Vázquez says the autobarman shown to the public for "a hasn't received much attention from the beer few months", according companies because "they don't really care to the zoo. Pandas are notoriously reluctant how it’s served".

breeders when held in captivity. Fewer than 1,600 pandas remain in

the wild, mainly in China, with a further 300 in cap­ tivity around the world.

30

Friday, September 6, 2013

Score with the ladies COURSE SOAKS UP GOTA FRIA

Summer is over for the ladies of the Rojales Netball Club who return to training this Tuesday. They have a busy autumn in front of them with lots of competitive fixtures, as well as hosting an international tournament next month.

New players will be made especially welcome to boost their squad, with training sessions every Tuesday at the Polideportivo, Quesada between 7.00pm and 8.30pm. For more details, phone Tracey on 679 539 995.

Crafts in the caves

Despite the heavy overnight rain, none of the members of Torregolf.EU could notice any sign of storm damage when they played their Stableford Competition at the Font del Llop course last Friday.

Tony Mackman and Ray Pollock won their respective categories in perfect conditions, whilst Paul Hurrell carded an Eagle on the final hole to earn himself a new nickname of Eddie the Hulk Eagle.

The Full Monte prize in support of CD Montesinos was sponsored by Vince Lannon, and won by David Rowlands.

The presentations and results were held at the El Raso Restaurant, where the players were photographed outside.

VENUE SWITCH The next meeting for the Torrevieja branch of the Royal British Legion is being held at a different venue. The September gathering on Friday September 13th will be at the Restaurant Kiosko, Cabo Cervera in Torrevieja at 6.30pm for 7.00pm.

The next arts and crafts market at the Cuevas del Rodeo ­ Rojales Artists' caves ­ will take place tomorrow (Saturday) from 7pm.

It will be the last evening event of the sum­ mer before returning to

the usual daytime mar­ kets in October on the first Sunday of the month.

Local artists and craft workers will be displaying their wares, as well as giving demonstrations & running workshops.

There will also be a

paella served from around 8 pm as well as live music from Funtastic Dixieland There’s more informa­ tion from Martin on 648 535 165 or from www.CostaArt.Net/caves. html

SAULED OUT

This Wednesday’s charity night(September 11th) starring Peter Saul at the El Alto La Dolores restaurant in Guardamar has had to be cancelled due work commitments in the UK. Full refunds are available or the tickets can be used for the next charity show with Woody & The Peckers on Wednesday October 9th.

Friday, September 6, 2013

31

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Friday, September 6, 2013

Horrorscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 Things are apt to remain quite orderly for you, Aries. Even though your heart may want to soar into the clouds, you'll find that there's a stable side to the equation that's working to keep things in perspective. You might want to consider making a greater commitment to someone you love. You're of a sound and solid mind to do so now.

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 The engagements in your social calendar are likely stacking up to the point of absurdity, Taurus. Make sure you sched­ ule some time for yourself somewhere in there. Today you're choosy about your companions. Feel free to say no to people you'd simply rather not see.

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 Just because your heart is feeling extra generous now doesn't mean that you need to send flowers to everyone you know, Gemini. On a day like this you should channel all your incredible love and affec­ tion to one special person. Help him or her feel like an important part of your life.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 You may be confused by your heart, Cancer. It may be extremely frustrating when you can't keep a tight rein on your emotions. This internal conflict is a signal that there's a lesson to learn. Perhaps your heart knows something that your conscious mind hasn't yet realized.

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 Your mind gives you a great deal of secu­ rity, Leo, which allows you to explore other worlds. You have your satellite out­ post operating smoothly, and you can now take trips into the frontier knowing that you have a secure facility to fall back on. Find new ways to bring love into your life.

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 This is a good time to get more serious about your art, Virgo. You were probably born with talent, but perhaps you don't treat it with as much respect as someone endowed with only a fraction of your nat­ ural ability. Look at your tools realistically and know that you have the power to accomplish a great deal when you put your creative nature into high gear.

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 Don't assume that the person you're try­ ing to reach is getting your messages, Libra. Perhaps you've been waiting for a reply, thinking that this person has blown you off. Maybe this person doesn't under­ stand the question you're trying to ask.

When it comes to matters of love and romance, you're going to have to spell things out.

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 You feel reprimanded because of the way you reacted to a situation that came out dif­ ferently than you'd hoped. Trust that you acted in the best, calmest, and most under­ standing way possible. If the person you're dealing with doesn't understand your actions, then this is probably more a func­ tion of their own baggage and not yours.

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 Something unusual could put a smile on your face today, Sagittarius. Look for beau­ ty and love in the simplest things. If you can't see it, then work on adjusting your attitude. Your inner state is likely what needs to be fixed, not the world around you. If you can shift to a light, understand­ ing mood, you'll receive the laughter and romance that are sure to brighten your day.

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 It's time to step up to the plate and take responsibility for the things you want to have happen, Capricorn. It's one thing to talk about great visions and dreams, but the bottom line is that they'll continue to remain abstract concepts unless you work to develop them into something solid and tangible. Test this theory for yourself today.

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 The warm, loving feeling that you've been happily nurturing is calling for a bit of practi­ cality in order to make your romantic life work out the way you want it to. Remember that less is more, Aquarius. Having love and romance in your life doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be best friends with every person you meet. This is a good time to enjoy more quality time with fewer people.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 You might feel a bit reserved when it comes to issues of love and romance, Pisces. Other people might consider this rather strange when they see that sudden­ ly your courageous forward motion comes to a dramatic halt. Don't feel like you need to make excuses for the way you feel. It's probably better if you slow down a bit, especially when it comes to love.

Friday, September 6, 2013

33

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Friday, September 6, 2013

RAC rolls out 'universal' spare wheel FOLLOWING a rise in the number of manufacturers that fit emergency tyre inflation kits instead of spare wheels, the RAC has introduced a 'universal' spare wheel to handle call outs for unfixable punctures.

Many cars now come with a tyre inflation kit as standard, as this saves a significant amount of weight and therefore helps overall CO2 emissions. But some punctures or a com­ plete blow­out can't be fixed with the tyre sealant systems.

According to the RAC, in the 12 months up to August 2012, it responded to 87,000 breakdowns involving a punc­ ture on a vehicle with no spare, and in the 12 months ending

in August 2013 this increased to approximately 120,000.

However the RAC claims its ‘universal’ spare wheel, which fits the majority of cars that don’t have a spare wheel fitted as standard. RAC patrols will fit the wheel quickly and liaise with the nearest ATS Euromaster centre on their behalf to find out what replacements are available.

Payment can be taken at the roadside by the RAC patrol, ensuring the customer can drive straight to ATS Euromaster, or book a mobile fitting at their convenience. The RAC will then arrange collection of the spare directly from ATS, avoid­ ing any further hassle.

Developed with specialist manufac­ turer Dynomec working in partnership with tyre expert ATS Euromaster, the five­stud, 17in lightweight alloy multi­fit wheel fits a high proportion of vehicles and will significantly cut down the time spent by members at the roadside, often in potentially dangerous situations such as on the hard shoulder of motor­ ways. Trials are taking place in South West England and Northern Ireland with some 200 patrols carrying the new wheel.

Head of RAC technical operations Phil Ryan said: “The Dynomec univer­ sal spare wheel demonstrates how the RAC is at the forefront of providing innovative solutions to help our individ­ ual members and business customers get back on the road as quickly as pos­ sible after they break down.

“We understand why motor manufac­ turers need to reduce the weight of their

vehicles in order to make them more fuel efficient and to meet EU carbon dioxide emissions targets and removal of the spare wheel helps them to achieve this.“But drivers should not suffer as a result, and in order to minimise the disruption and inconvenience that punctures can cause, the universal spare wheel provides additional options for patrols to deal with breakdowns more quickly and effectively. We are already seeing very positive results from the trials and we expect the universal wheel to become an increasingly common sight on our roads.”

Friday, September 6, 2013

35

36

Friday, September 6, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 21 represents P and 1 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Residue (7) 5 Accept eagerly (3,2) 8 Film advertisement (7) 9 Push (5) 10 Impulsive (4) 11 Crash into (7) 12 Wager (3) 13 Play (5) 15 Brush (5) 17 Existed (3) 18 Trip (7) 19 Charges (4) 22 Chose (5) 23 Preserve (7) 24 Information (5) 25 Very drunk (7)

1 Stopped work (7) 2 Repasts (5) 3 Inactive (4) 4 Stern (6) 5 Sluggish (8) 6 Make available (7) 7 Fragment (5) 12 Caribbean island (8) 14 Relating to water (7) 16 Own (7) 17 Small carnivorous mam­ mal (6) 18 Ridicule (5) 20 Obliterate (5) 21 Whip (4)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Bias, 4 Angler, 9 Bisects, 10 Shape, 11 Slash, 12 Suspect, 14 Future, 15 Canter, 18 Intense, 20 Taint, 22 Amble, 24 Barrier, 25 Banter, 26 Dank.

Down: 2 Instant, 3 Saccharin, 4 Assist, 5 Gas, 6 Evade, 7 Ibis, 8 Better, 13 Scattered, 14 Friday, 16 Tuition, 17 Member, 19 Tibia, 21 Turn, 23 Eat.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 In the meantime, put ‘im under (7) 5 Decrees as a result of a broken wrist (5) 8 Crave to badly ham it up (7) 9 Avoid start of diet, orange drinks give energy (5) 10 Keep silent about moth­ er’s accident (5) 11 Begin to broadcast out­ side (4­3) 12 Does change include copper coin? (6) 14 I vary a broken down barred enclosure (6) 17 Creeps call into church before Sunday (7) 19 Some native general back in the desert (5) 22 Drummer injured groin (5) 23 Reginald and I take on southern parts of the world (7) 24 Even now it’s neces­ sary for the spirits (5)

25 Voyage to the East in a ship offers these lines (7) Down 1 Melted coins for pictures (5) 2 Greek letter seen in the tabloids (5) 3 Got to each, in colour (7) 4 Dog about to get some meat (6) 5 Triangular block on the west side of the city (5) 6 State goddess gets in first (7) 7 Believe in the new Serb way (5,2) 12 Calls for more or scene change (7) 13 I interrupt, and follow, the chant, it’s the wine (7) 15 Sour liquid made in grave (7) 16 Is, is or not exactly an Egyptian god (6) 18 Produce a half century with guttural sound (5) 20 Bracket together from Montenegro upbringing (5) 21 Gives power to under­ garments (5)

STANDARD CLUES Down Across 1 Images (5) 1 Temporary (7) 2 Greek letter (5) 5 Court orders (5) 3 Arrived at (7) 8 Exaggerate (7) 4 Sheep’s flesh as food (6) 9 Avoid (5) 5 Golf club (5) 10 Break into pieces (5) 6 US state (7) 11 Alfresco (4­3) 7 Endorse (5,2) 12 Former Portuguese cur­ 12 Bonus performances (7) rency (6) 13 Italian table wine (7) 14 Bird sanctuary (6) 15 Dilute acetic acid (7) 17 Shrinks back (7) 16 Egyptian deity (6) 19 Desert in Israel (5) 18 Guttural warning (5) 22 Beatles’ drummer (5) 20 Band (5) 23 Areas (7) 21 Sleeveless undergar­ 24 Stationary (5) ments (5) 25 Chevrons (7) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Custard, 5 Fatal, 8 Resting, 9 Iliad, 10 Spied, 11 Athlete, 12 Target, 14 Miners, 17 Algebra, 19 Hocks, 22 Korea, 23 Curable, 24 Doses, 25 Potency.

Down: 1 Carts, 2 Sushi, 3 Ariadne, 4 Dogtag, 5 Faith, 6 Trireme, 7 Ladders, 12 Thanked, 13 Regards, 15 Inherit, 16 Madcap, 18 Brass, 20 Cabin, 21 Seedy.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words At Be Is Me 3 letter words Age Ale All Ape Are Ave Baa Bee End Fen Get Gnu How

Ire Lea Loy Lug Odd Oft Ore Pea Ply Pun Red Sap Set She Tie Tog Urn 4 letter words Aloe Area

Babe Bars Bass Bent Case Cost Dead Elan Ewes Free Fret Held Hers Ions Lens Lilt Live Nose Oafs Onus Pass

Riga Roar Sale Salt Sand Sane Save Seat Sere Side Tent 5 letter words Event Fraps Geese Horse Inert Meant Opens Revue

Sales Sedge State Taboo 6 letter words Barrio Landed Seabed Settee Shield Tattle 7 letter words Bastion Seaside 8 letter words Reverend Sessions

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Detalles (7) 5 To quote (writer, line, passage, source) (5) 8 Más pequeño (7) 9 Pecho (5) 10 Tiendas (5) 11 Our (7) 12 Ears (6) 14 Tornillos (6) 17 Abuela (7) 19 Salta (5) 22 Flat (level) (5) 23 Degastar (tejido, moqueta, neumático) (4,3) 24 Sheep (5) 25 Gafas (para ver) (7)

Down 1 Escritorios (muebles) (5) 2 Cloth (for cleaning) (5) 3 Church (7) 4 Fuerte (6) 5 Ciclo (en hechos repetidos) (5) 6 Teatro (7) 7 Raciones (porciones) (7) 12 Pride (satisfaction) (7) 13 Emanar (7) 15 Waterfall (7) 16 Tijereta (insecto) (6) 18 Drug (estupefaciente, medicamento) (5) 20 Ídolos (5) 21 Mushrooms (flat­ topped) (5)

37

Friday, September 6, 2013 Across 8 What first name connects the husband of Queen Victoria and the character played by Buster Merryfield in Only Fools and Horses?

(6) 9 What word of French ori­ gin is often used for a woman’s light dressing gown, typically made of a filmy fabric? (8) 10 Which light brown cane sugar takes its name from a region of Guyana? (8) 11 An icosahedron has how many plane faces? (6) 12 Which word completes the title of a UK Top 10 hit single by Patti Page: (How Much Is) That [What] in the Window? (6) 13 How many players are there in a rugby league team? (8) 15 Which adverb of French origin means ‘in a group’ or ‘all together’? (2,5) 17 Which fast­running African flightless bird with two­toed feet is the largest living bird? (7) 20 Which sheikhdom of eastern Arabia is the capital

Quiz Word

of the United Arab Emirates? (3,5) 22 When Doves Cry, Purple Rain and Kiss were all UK Top 10 hit singles for which American singer­song­ writer? (6) 23 Which record label was founded by Chris Blackwell and Graeme Goodall in Jamaica in 1959? (6) 25 In biochemistry, what is the name of the main struc­ tural protein found in animal connective tissue, yielding gelatin when boiled? (8) 26 What name for ‘a meet­ ing at which candidates in an election address poten­ tial voters’ or ‘the campaign­ ing associated with an elec­ tion’ is derived from the Old English for ‘deliberative assembly’ or ‘council’? (8) 27 The name of which guid­ ed missile developed by the French government for use against ships means ‘flying fish’ in French? (6) Down 1 Which classic popular ballad, written by Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart in

SUDOKU (Medium)

1934, has been covered by artists such as Billie Holiday, Dean Martin, Mel Torme, Elvis Presley, Bob Dylan, Beady Eye, Frank

Sinatra, Julie London, Cliff Richard and the ‘doo­wop’ group the Marcels? (4,4) 2 What name is often applied to the region of

north­eastern United States comprising Maine, New Hampshire, Vermont, Massachusetts Rhode Island and Connecticut?

(3,7) 3 Which verb means ‘to attack with machine guns or cannon fire from a low­flying plane’? (6) 4 Historically, what title was borne by a daughter of the ruling monarch of Spain or Portugal, especially the eld­ est daughter who was not heir to the throne? (7) 5 What name is often given to ‘acts undertaken to increase your own power and influence or to draw attention to your own impor­ tance’? (3,5) 6 What was the surname of the naive young bank clerk and Home Guard private in Dad’s Army and It Sticks Out Half a Mile, played by actor Ian Lavender? (4) 7 Which heavy tool with a rounded end, is used for crushing and grinding sub­ stances such as spices or drugs, typically in a mortar?

(6)

14 The 1984 American sci­ ence­fiction action film star­ ring Arnold Schwarzenegger as a cyborg sent back in time to assassinate Sarah Connor (Linda Hamilton), was enti­ tled The [What]? (10) 16 In basketball, what name is given to a shot in which a player thrusts the ball down through the basket? (4,4) 18 Which bird standing upon a football is the emblem of Tottenham Hotspur F C? (8) 19 What name for a district under the pastoral care of a bishop in the Christian Church comes from the Latin for ‘district under a governor’? (7) 21 Which rich shellfish soup is typically made from lob­ ster? (6) 22 Which fine powdery sub­ stance, typically yellow, consists of microscopic grains discharged from the male part of a flower or from a male cone? (6) 24 Which musical part or section is higher than tenor and lower than soprano? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

LA POLITICA ­ POLITICS Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

el candidato

el referendo

el diputado

el voto

el gobierno

la dictadura

el golpe de estado

la libertad

el partido

la manifestación

el portavoz

la mayoría

el presidente

la minoría

history QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. Raisins 2. The First Airship Crossing, North Pole 3. Harvard 4. Colour Television 5. Steven Weed 6.

News stories 7. Russia under the rule of Czar Nicholas 8.

France 9. Houston 10. Apothecaries 11. George Fox 12.

ITT 13. Two penny Blue

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1 Fossil, 4 Eminence, 10 Apartheid, 11 Rabat, 12 Eden, 13 Penicillin, 15 Chicory, 16 Fiscal, 19 Septet, 21 Lesotho, 23 Black Death, 25 Ride, 27 Cider, 28 Chevalier, 29 Sunbaked, 30 Tennis.

Down: 1 Flamenco, 2 Snakebite, 3 Iota, 5 Midriff, 6 Narcissism, 7 Nobel, 8 Extant, 9 Celery, 14 South Korea, 17 Attrition, 18 Foie gras, 20 Treacle, 21 Litter, 22 Abacus, 24 Auden, 26 Cage.

el primer ministro Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.el candidato, 2.el diputado,

13.la manifestación,

j.the president,

3.el gobierno,

14.la mayoría, 15.la minoría.

k.the dictatorship, l.the majority, m.the government,

4.el golpe de estado, 5.el partido, 6.el portavoz,

a.the vote, b.the spokesperson,

n.the prime­minister,

7.el presidente,

c.freedom, d.the coup,

o.the referendum.

8.el primer ministro,

e.the minister, f.the candidate,

9.el referendo, 10.el voto,

g.the demonstration,

11.la dictadura, 12.la libertad,

h.the minority, i.the party,

Soduko

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

Answers: 1f, 2e, 3m, 4d, 5i, 6b, 7j, 8n, 9o, 10a, 11k, 12c, 13g, 14l, 15h.

1. In 1000 B.C. Israelites paid their taxes in what?

2. The Italian Umberto Nobile became famous in 1926 for?

3. What's the oldest college in the u.s.?

4. In 1953, what was successfully transmitted in the USA? 5. Who was Patricia Hurst with the night she was kid­ napped?

6. What first appeared on Page 1 of the Times on May 3rd, 1966?

7. Which country was the first to abolish capital punish­ ment in 1826?

8. Which country had The Dauphin as a ruler?

9. Which geographical location was the first word spo­ ken on the moon?

10. Which society cared for plague victims after physi­ cians left in 1665?

11. Who was the founder of the Quakers?

12. Who did Dita Beard work for?

13. The penny black was the world's first stamp, what was second?

Fill It In

38

Friday, September 6, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY

FAB SHARON MAKES X FACTOR FUN

with ALEX TRELINSKI It was the good, the bad, and the surprising for ITV on their new Saturday night line up, and it was more than enough last weekend to destroy the BBC, who in audience terms, didn’t have one show that broke the 4 mil­ lion barrier. With Strictly Come Dancing and new dra­ mas like Atlantis on the way, things will change, but the early blow in the autumn ratings war goes very much to ITV. The great news for them is that The X Factor is well and truly back in more ways than one. The show has recovered its swagger, after last year’s series bor­ dered on being just nasty and disconnect­ ing with the viewers.

This was fun with the return of the closed auditions as well as Sharon Osbourne to the judge’s table. The atmos­ phere was completely differ­ ent with the absence of the miserable drug­taking Tulisa, and Mrs.O being given a brief to make us laugh, as well as showing her mature and caring nature to the con­ testants. I also liked the fact

that we got the judge’s room on the Saturday and then the follow­up audition in the Arena the following night. I’m certain that Sharon will lose it when we get to the live shows, which is what the ITV bosses want, but based on the first weekend, I’m con­ vinced that view­ ers who got bored with it over the last two years will return to what gen­ uinely looks like a happy show.

Preceding The X Factor, ITV screened the first of it’s Strictly rip­off, Stepping Out. I’m sure that Bruce Forsyth’s collection of wigs cost more than the budget for this 90­ minute filler. So you get six so­ called real­life

q

celebrity couples dancing in a six­week contest, and yawn yawn, you eventually get a winner. At least we had the novelty of seeing Denise Welch in a sober state with her new toyboy hubby who appears to be losing his hair quickly since getting married to her a few weeks ago.

Davina McCall did her best as host, but this bored the pants off me, and I wiped my recording after just half an hour, because I just couldn’t care less. The BBC won’t lose any sleep over this dud, which serves a useful pur­ pose in proving once again what a high­class product Strictly Come Dancing is.

Last year’s Strictly win­ ner, Louis Smith, popped up in what for me was the surprise of the night: ­ a new Keith Lemon pre­ sented version of Through the Keyhole. I hated the orig­ inal show and not exactly being a Lemon fan club

q

member, I was ready for TV hell, but I ended up really enjoying it. We got celebrities that we actually heard of, let­ ting their homes be looked at

by Lemon, who at times was actually funny, both on loca­ tion and in the studio. The let down was a panel that fea­ tured the talentless Martine McCutcheon. You could hear her two brain cells clunking away as she tried to work out the home owners, but at least she gave us the great news that she wasn’t plan­ ning to do any more films, but sadly she is planning to record more music. Keyhole is at last the first ITV hit vehi­ cle for Keith Lemon, after his ITV2 success with Celebrity Juice, and unbelievably I’ll be watching the rest of the series.

The format of Keyhole was owned by the great Sir David Frost, who died last weekend. In an incredible year for losing TV legends, it

q

is easy to forget how he bounced onto the scene in the sixties, and fronted the ground­breaking satirical show that emptied the Saturday night pubs, That Was The Week That Was. He then made his name as a talk show host, including an amazing demolition of the insurance fraudster, Emil Savundra. Just look for that on You Tube, and you might agree with me that it was one of the all­time great TV moments. Frost became gentler as time moved on, whilst everybody else got tougher, and I’m in a minority in thinking that was a shame.

He lost his edge for me, but his fantastic work on screen and behind the scenes for over half a century made him one of the true TV greats, and I was always a fan of his.

Let’s hope that the man at the pearly gates has already said hello, good evening, and welcome to him!

The Courier Friday TV

September 6

00:35 02:10 02:15 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 19:30 20:00 20:30 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:25 23:35

The Greatest Holiday Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather BBC London News The One Show BBC News; Regional News Nigel Slater's Dish of the Day EastEnders Celebrity MasterChef Big School Mrs Brown's Boys BBC News Regional News and Weather National Lottery Update Would I Lie to You?

BBC2 00:20 March 01:20 02:20 03:20 04:20

Martin Luther King and the on Washington The Review Show Britain's Biggest Hoarders What Remains This Is BBC Two

04:55 Schools ­ Writing for Walford 05:25 Schools ­ How to Write 05:55 Schools ­ Vikings 06:35 What Makes Me, Me 06:50 Wonders of Nature: Polar Bear ­ Mother and Baby 06:50 Wonders of Nature: Flamingo ­ Courtship Spectacle 06:55 Homes Under the Hammer 07:55 Don't Get Done, Get Dom 08:40 Plan It, Build It 09:10 The A to Z of TV Cooking 09:55 Formula 1 11:35 The A to Z of TV Gardening 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Formula 1 15:35 Coast 16:00 Great British Menu 16:30 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Antiques Roadshow 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! 20:00 Athletics 22:00 Natural World 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 The Last Word 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Star Treatment 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Long Lost Family 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live International Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV News Meridian 23:50 International Football Highlight

NATURAL WORLD Wildlife cameraman Colin Stafford­Johnson trav­ els to the Indonesian island of Sulawesi to exam­ ine the lives of Celebes crested macaques, which are found nowhere else in the world. He teams up with a local biologist to get to know some of the characters in the troop and reveal their habits, and learns that the species has become endangered due to an illegal trade in its meat ­ which is seen as a delicacy.

00:05 Burgled 01:10 Random Acts 01:15 Siege in the Sahara 02:15 Rebuilding the World Trade Centre 03:25 Inside Nature's Giants 04:25 Four Rooms 05:20 Deal or No Deal 06:15 Countdown 06:55 SuperScrimpers 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Hugh's 3 Good Things 08:05 According to Jim 08:35 Will & Grace 09:00 Frasier 10:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:05 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 Undercover Boss USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Hugh's 3 Good Things 13:35 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 13:50 Pimpernel Smith 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Four Rooms 22:00 Secrets of the Pickpockets 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Divine Designs 05:25 HouseBusters 05:50 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Milkshake! Monkey 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Dead Lines 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Cricket on 5 21:00 Construction Squad: Operation Homefront 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:30 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side

39

The Courier Saturday TV

September 7

Monarchy 04:20 This Is BBC Two

00:05 Fallen

07:00 This Is BBC Two

02:05 Weatherview

07:40 Formula 1

02:10 BBC News

09:20 Formula 1

07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Football Focus 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

10:55 Formula 1 12:10 The Sky at Night 12:30 The A to Z of TV Cooking 13:15 Caribbean Food Made Easy 13:45 Indian Food Made Easy

13:10 Formula 1 15:30 Homes Under the Hammer 16:30 Bargain Hunt 17:15 Escape to the Country 18:00 That Puppet Game Show 18:40 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:00 Pointless Celebrities 19:50 Strictly Come Dancing 21:10 The National Lottery: Break the Safe 22:00 BBC News; Weather 22:20 National Lottery Update

14:15 University Challenge 14:45 Exploring China: A Culinary Adventure 15:45 Wild China 16:45 Urban Jungle 17:15 Flog It! 18:00 Natural World 19:00 Dragons' Den 20:00 Dad's Army 20:30 BBC Proms 2013 22:05 Mock the Week 22:35 360

Roadshow BBC2 00:00 Weather 00:05 The Tempest 01:45 In Search of a Midnight Kiss

00:05 Paul Chowdhry: What's Happening White People?

01:10 Random Acts 01:15 The Last Leg 02:00 I'm Spazticus 02:25 New Girl 02:45 The Mindy Project 03:10 The Ricky Gervais Show 03:40 St Elsewhere 04:30 Four Rooms 05:25 Deal or No Deal 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 British Rallycross 08:00 The Grid 08:30 FIM World Superbikes 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:00 The Simpsons 13:30 Undercover Boss Australia 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:45 Channel 4 News 20:05 Double Your House for Half the Money 21:00 Grand Designs 22:00 Insidious

INSIDIOUS

22:20 BBC Proms 2013 23:55 Michael McIntyre's Comedy

00:50 River Monsters 01:15 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Double Exposure 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Fish Hooks 08:50 Horrid Henry 09:00 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Dinner Date 10:25 Saturday Cookbook 11:20 Murder, She Wrote 12:20 Saturday Farm 13:20 ITV News and Weather 13:24 ITV Meridian Weather 13:25 The Dales 13:55 Midsomer Murders 15:50 Mr Bean's Holiday 17:30 The X Factor 18:30 ITV News Meridian 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 New You've Been Framed!

19:30 Stepping Out 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Through the Keyhole 23:00 ITV News and Weather 23:14 ITV Meridian Weather 23:15 Hellboy II: the Golden Army

Supernatural thriller starring Patrick Wilson and Rose Byrne. Following an accident in the home, the young son of Josh and Renai Lambert falls into a comatose state that leaves doctors baffled. Renai becomes convinced that the house is haunted and somehow responsible for her son's condition and persuades her husband to move. But their new house appears to be haunted too.

03:20 David Starkey's Music &

00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers: Megaforce 11:35 Slugterra 12:00 Inside Hollywood 12:05 Celebrity Big Brother 13:30 Highland Emergency 14:00 The Hotel Inspector 15:00 Columbo: Ransom for a Dead Man 17:00 The Way West 19:20 North Sea Hijack 21:00 5 News Weekend 21:05 NCIS 22:00 NCIS 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

The Courier Sunday TV

September 8

07:00 Desert Passage 08:00 They Live by Night 00:25 The Recruit 02:15 Weatherview 02:20 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 Homes Under the Hammer 13:00 BBC News 13:05 Weather for the Week Ahead 13:10 Formula 1 16:15 Victoria Wood's Nice Cup of Tea 17:15 Escape to the Country 18:00 Songs of Praise 18:35 Britain's Big Wildlife Revival 19:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 What Remains

09:30 Around the World in 80 Gardens 10:30 The Beechgrove Garden 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 The Incredible Spice Men 13:00 What to Eat Now 13:30 EastEnders 15:25 Coast 15:45 Sailing 16:30 Equestrian 18:30 Flog It! 19:30 Iolo's Great Welsh Parks 20:00 The Great British Bake Off 21:00 Dragons' Den 22:00 The Story of the Jews 23:00 QI XL 23:45 Blackadder the Third

01:25 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Fish Hooks 08:50 Horrid Henry 09:00 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Country House Sunday 10:25 Ade in Britain 11:20 Murder, She Wrote 12:20 ITV News and Weather 12:34 ITV Meridian Weather 12:35 Columbo: Murder, a Self­ Portrait 14:35 Dinner Date 15:35 The X Factor 16:40 Big Star's Little Star 17:45 Land of the Lost 19:30 ITV News Meridian 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Coronation Street 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Vera

TINKER TAILOR SOLDIER SPY

23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Room 101 ­ Extra Storage

BBC2 00:20 An Unfinished Life 02:00 This Is BBC Two

Spy thriller adapted from John le Carré's novel and based on the classic television series, starring Gary Oldman and Colin Firth. Following the death of an agent, information is received that a Soviet mole is operating at the heart of the British secret service. Veteran operative George Smiley is called out of retirement to try to uncover the spy and he soon discovers that you can trust no­one ­ not even those closest to you.

00:05 02:00 03:00 05:15 06:05 06:50 07:10 07:35 08:05 09:00 09:30 10:00 10:30 13:30 13:55 14:25 14:55 15:25 17:15 18:20 20:40 20:55 21:00 22:00

Don't Be Afraid of the Dark The Experiments Hollyoaks Deal or No Deal Countdown Kirstie's Handmade Treasures The Hoobs Ironman 2013 Hard Knocks Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Frasier Sunday Brunch The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory The Simpsons The Simpsons Bugsy Malone Location, Location, Location Stardust Channel 4 News The Political Slot The Rise of Hitler Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Psych 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:05 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:35 Milkshake! Monkey 08:40 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:10 Milkshake! Show Songs 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:30 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 The Mr Men Show 11:15 Power Rangers Samurai 11:50 Slugterra 12:10 Monkey Life 12:40 Celebrity Big Brother 13:40 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 14:40 Sabrina the Teenage Witch 16:25 Pocahontas 18:00 White Fang 20:00 Cricket on 5 21:00 Once Upon a Time 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Mr & Mrs Smith

40

The Courier Monday TV

September 9

00:05 00:45 02:55 03:00 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35 BBC2

That Puppet Game Show Fame Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News BBC London News The One Show Inside Out EastEnders Panorama Motorway Cops BBC News Regional News and Weather Child of Our Time

00:15 01:40 02:35 03:35 07:00 07:05 08:05

Shifty Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer Don't Get Done, Get Dom

08:50 Plan It, Build It 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Restoration Home 11:05 Robbed, Raided, Reunited 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Sailing 15:15 Coast 15:20 Great British Menu 15:50 Animal Park 16:35 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 The Incredible Spice Men 22:00 Robert Peston Goes Shopping 23:00 The Sarah Millican Television Programme 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:00 ITV News and Weather 00:14 ITV Meridian Weather 00:15 The Unforgettable 00:45 Premiership Rugby Union 01:40 The Store 03:40 Motorsport UK 04:30 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Doc Martin 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Benidorm

00:30 01:30 02:15 05:45 06:15 07:10 07:35 08:00 08:15 08:40 09:00 09:35 10:05 10:35 11:05 11:35 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:40 13:55 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:40

Alan Carr: Chatty Man 8 Out of 10 Cats American Football Live Ironman 2013 Deal or No Deal The Hoobs The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things Kirstie's Vintage Gems Father Goose Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Jamie's Money Saving Meals Gadget Man Blackout Ramsay's Hotel Hell

BLACKOUT Feature­length docudrama exploring the effects of a devastating cyber attack on Britain's national grid.

Based on expert advice and research, the film com­ bines actual footage recorded during power cuts and other emergencies with fictional scenes and news stories to build a realistic account of the nation being plunged into darkness. Eyewitness reports reveal the impact of the crisis on hospitals, law and order, transport and food and water supplies, as the programme reveals how society might descend into chaos and anarchy during a prolonged blackout.

01:20 An American Haunting 02:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Wildlife SOS 05:20 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:05 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:25 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News at Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:05 Rosamunde Pilcher's Shades of Love 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Hustling America 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Under the Dome

The Courier Tuesday TV

September 10

00:35 01:20 01:25 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 19:30 20:00 20:30 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Live at the Apollo Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather BBC London News The One Show BBC News; Regional News EastEnders Holby City New Tricks BBC News Regional News and Weather Child of Our Time

BBC2 00:20 The Story of the Jews 01:20 The Hairy Bikers: Restoration Road Trip 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 The Code 05:30 Schools ­ Megabits 06:00 Schools: After Life ­ Rot Box Detectives

06:55 Wonders of Nature: Knots ­ Flocking 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Street Patrol UK 08:50 Plan It, Build It 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Britain's Big Wildlife Revival 11:05 Robbed, Raided, Reunited 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 The Super League Show 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Animal Park 16:45 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 The Midwives 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Newsnight 23:30 Weather

00:05 Through the Keyhole 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:45 Emmerdale 20:15 Live International Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV News Meridian 23:45 International Football Highlights

BORN TO KILL? 5/6. In 1979, Richmond, Virginia, was hit by a series of random killings that terrified the resi­ dents of the city and surrounding regions for seven months. The police eventually arrested brothers Linwood, James and Anthony Briley and accomplice Duncan Meekins, with the two elder siblings receiving death sentences. In this pro­ gramme, eyewitnesses and criminal experts analyse their motives and personalities.

00:35 Educating Yorkshire 01:35 Random Acts 01:40 Top Boy 02:40 Run 03:30 Misfits 04:25 Nashville 05:10 Operation Amsterdam 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Hugh's 3 Good Things 08:05 According to Jim 08:35 Will & Grace 09:00 Frasier 10:05 Everybody Loves Raymond 11:05 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 Undercover Boss USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Hugh's 3 Good Things 13:35 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 13:50 The Professionals 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Double Your House for Half the Money 22:00 Top Boy 23:00 Secrets of the Pickpockets

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:50 True Crimes: The First 72 Hours 02:15 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Milkshake! Monkey 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:05 Rosamunde Pilcher's Shades of Love 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Monkey Life 20:30 5 News Update 20:30 Highland Emergency 21:00 Born to Kill?

22:00 CSI: NY 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

41

The Courier Wednesday TV

September 11

00:35 01:35 01:40 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 19:30 20:00 20:30 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35 2013

Goodnight Britain Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News Weather BBC London News The One Show BBC News; Regional News Rip Off Food EastEnders Who Do You Think You Are? BBC News Regional News and Weather The National Lottery Awards

BBC2 00:20 Mum and Dad Are Splitting Up 01:20 Britain's Biggest Hoarders 02:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ One Hundred Years of the Women's Movement 05:25 Schools ­ How God Made the English

06:00 Ancient Egypt: Life and Death in the Valley of the Kings 06:40 Schools ­ William Whiskerson: Orchard 06:50 Schools ­ William Whiskerson: Canal 07:00 Homes Under the Hammer 08:00 Street Patrol UK 08:45 Plan It, Build It 09:15 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:00 Wild Shepherdess with Kate Humble 11:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Sailing 15:15 Coast 15:20 Great British Menu 15:50 Animal Park 16:35 Talking Pictures 17:15 How We Built Britain 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 Harvest 2013 22:00 The Wipers Times 23:30 Newsnight

00:50 01:35 02:20 04:00 04:45 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:35

In Plain Sight In Plain Sight Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV News Meridian Storage Hoarders The Alan Titchmarsh Show ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Chase ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Big Star's Little Star Whitechapel ITV News at Ten and Weather ITV News Meridian Great Night Out

00:05 01:10 01:15 02:10 03:05 03:35 04:30 04:55 05:25 05:55 06:50 07:10 08:00 08:05 08:35 09:00 10:05 11:05 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:35 13:50 16:10 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:50

Bouncers Random Acts Poker Hard Knocks KOTV Boxing Weekly Beach Volleyball The Grid British Rallycross FIM World Superbikes Four Rooms SuperScrimpers The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things Kirstie's Vintage Gems The Battle of the River Plate Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv How Not to Get Old Grand Designs The Last Leg Ramsay's Hotel Hell

WHITECHAPEL Part two of two. A connection to a 16th­century murder seems to confirm someone is killing witches in Whitechapel. Chandler is on the case, but is there a malign influence at work within the team? The police station itself appears to pulsate with unexplained phenomena and even the usu­ ally hard­bitten Miles starts to ask questions.

Crime thriller, starring Rupert Penry­Jones, Phil Davis and Steve Pemberton.

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:05 Rosamunde Pilcher's Shades of Love 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 The Hotel Inspector 21:00 Nurses 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Wentworth Prison

The Courier Thursday TV

September 12

00:20 01:55 02:00 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 Mouth 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35 23:45

Sliding Doors Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer Street Patrol UK Plan It, Build It Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Perfection Escape to the Country Wanted Down Under Put Your Money Where Your Is Pointless BBC News BBC London News The One Show EastEnders Waterloo Road Crimewatch BBC News Regional News and Weather Crimewatch Update Question Time

BBC2 00:15 00:20 01:20 02:20 05:00 06:00

Weather The Midwives Britain's Biggest Hoarders This Is BBC Two Schools ­ Bitesize Science Schools ­ Absolute Genius

with Dick and Dom 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:05 Homes Under the Hammer 08:05 Street Patrol UK 08:50 Plan It, Build It 09:20 The A to Z of TV Cooking 10:05 Flog It! Trade Secrets 11:05 Raymond Blanc: How to Cook Well 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Mastermind 14:30 Weakest Link 15:15 Great British Menu 15:45 Animal Park 16:45 Talking Pictures 17:15 Seven Ages of Britain 18:15 Cash in the Attic 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Flog It! Trade Secrets 20:00 Hairy Bikers' Best of British 21:00 Harvest 2013 22:00 Peaky Blinders 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 James Nesbitt's Ireland 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Columbo: Troubled Waters 05:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 Storage Hoarders 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Chase 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Pat and Cabbage 22:00 The Guilty 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 Elizabeth: the Golden Age

BRITAIN'S STRANGEST PETS

Reptile enthusiast Chris Weller searches for a mate for his 6ft­long monitor lizard Hector, and thinks he may have found the answer when he gets in touch with Steve Foo, who keeps 20 of the creatures in his attic. Janey Byrne, who owns a 17st Vietnamese pot­bellied pig, offers an insight into her unusual pet's pampered lifestyle, and Kate Johnson devises a plan to make her overly domesticated hen Floella start laying eggs.

00:45 00:50 02:45 03:45 06:50 07:10 08:00 08:05 08:35 09:00 10:05 11:05 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:35 Away 14:35 16:30 17:15 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00

Random Acts iTunes Festival 2013 Shameless USA Mother India SuperScrimpers The Hoobs Hugh's 3 Good Things According to Jim Will & Grace Frasier Everybody Loves Raymond The Big Bang Theory Undercover Boss USA Channel 4 News Summary Hugh's 3 Good Things A Place in the Sun: Home or Channel 4 Racing Countdown Deal or No Deal Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Location, Location, Location Educating Yorkshire Bouncers

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Cricket on 5 02:00 Poker 02:45 SuperCasino 04:55 Divine Designs 05:20 HouseBusters 05:45 House Doctor 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Rupert Bear 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Cowboy Builders 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:05 Rosamunde Pilcher's Shades of Love 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Britain's Strangest Pets 21:00 The Railway: First Great Western 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 10 Things I Hate About

42

Friday, September 6, 2013

BOATS FOR SALE

ACCOUNTANTS

Mooring for sale in Guardamar Marina, de las Dunas. 10m x 3.5m.

Pontoon B. No G5 tax.

19,995€ 965 419 085 / 636 800 371 (130)

Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more.

We cater for companies and self­employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

PROPERTY FOR RENT

ANIMALS Pet Travel UK family pet transporters Spain/UK. Travel with your pet for free.

All air conditioned vehicles (no vans) www.pettraveluk.co.uk UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

BOATS FOR SALE GC15: 16m Guy Couach motor cruiser, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, kitchen, lounge/dining area, and fly­ bridge. 2 x Mercedes 350kw diesel motors. 56000 €. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 A57: Rare Vintage 1957 Astondoa Classic Wooden motor launch, 10 m with Perkins diesel engine. All in working order. Needs TLC and re­varnish, great proj­ ect, 6000 €. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 .

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non­denomina­ tional church. Sunday serv­ ices 11am.

Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club,

AIR CONDITIONING

MOORINGS

Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation­ alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer.

Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.

CommunityChurch@gmail.c om or contact Reverend Eddie on 966769300 or 650509606.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES FOR SALE. Supermarket ‘Traspasa’. Fully stocked plus machines / shelving.

Been running with present owner 7 years. Good income. In high street Guardamar. Near Weds market. 20.000€ ONO. Tel: 634 106 460 Busy bar/restaurant in San Javier, close to airport, sell­ ing up due to health prob­ lems. Loyal clientele, ideal

CATERING

CARS FOR SALE

location. Phone 634362820 for further information.

INSURANCE Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully com­ prehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963 CASER SEGUROS ­ for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral.

Policies available in English and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

ALARMS

Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.vil­ laandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart­ ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry sys­ tem. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (136) Ref: 61, A lovely two bed­ roomed ground floor apart­ ment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swim­ ming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking dis­ tance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spa­ cious 2 bedroom apartment, located in Torre la Mata.

Close to all amenities and beach.

3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apart­ ment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and

CARPENTER

Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bed­ room detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, super­ market, restaurants and bars. Short term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bed­ room apartment, located near los Locos beach, beau­ tifully furnished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The proper­ ty overlooks a superb com­ munal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops.

Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Brand new 2 bed, furnished/ unfurnished / apartment.

Algorfa town centre, swim­ ming pool, rent €200/225 monthly or yearly advance €2400 + plus bills . 0044­ 7949­589­539 londonan­ gels@hotmail.com (134)

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963 CBR32 : 3 bed, 2 bath apart­ ment in Los Montesinos, very spacious 120 m2, fully furnished, with pool on solarium, only 300 € p/m, available from beginning September, call now on 966 923 963 CBR31 : Town centre apart­ ment in Los Montesinos, with lift, lock up storeroom

on solarium, all amenities nearby, spacious 2 bed 1 bath, 250 € p/m 966 923 963 El Chaparel/La Siesta Two bedroom apartment in a quiet gated urbanisation for rent €350 per month plus bills. Reference No 17 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bed­ room apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 RS110 : Immaculate detached villa for rent, 2 bedrooms & 2 bathrooms, closed carport for parking on plot, communal pool, no smokers or pets please, viewings from 4 Sept, 450 € pcm. Call 96 692 3963.

CBR27 – Ground floor apartment in closed luxury residential with beautiful communal gardens, pool, 2 beds 1 walk­in shower, redecorated this year. Only 250m walk to beach, inc.parking. 425€ pcm, call 966 923 963

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover ­ Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros ­ excellent prices for expats; policies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote.

Butia Espana Are you trapped. Need to sell quick.

We are the only answer for a speedy sale.UK buyers wait­ ing. www.butiaespana.com Telephone 0800 612 7514 or Spain 678 756 644 (131) Rare opportunity to pur­ chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large

BARBER CAR HIRE

CLEANERS

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Friday, September 6, 2013 communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros.

Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing RS80 : Spanish style town­ house in Algorfa, totally reformed and redecorated, 110m2, 3 lrg.bedrooms, 1 bathroom, many extras, absolute bargain at 99,500 €, call now on 966 923 963 for no obligation viewing.

Ref: 510, €70,000.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the super­ markets, bars and restau­ rants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking and faces large oasis com­ munal pool. Walking dis­

tance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach. The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Recently refur­ bished apartment in a good central location.

Conveniently situated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea front with its abundant cafes, restaurants and shops. Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis. Great sea and lake views. 55.000 €. Tel. 966 923 963 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in

CAR BREAKERS

Novamar, Gran Alacant.

Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods.

Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles.

It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground park­ ing, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views.

Viewings absolutely essen­ tial. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool.

Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks pro­ jected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 com­ munal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popu­ lar urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005.

Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch

HOUSE / BAR CLEARANCE

and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg.

Tel. 680333242 Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons.

Greenland Views and all local amenities close by.

Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Ref: 520, €80,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath­ roomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interi­ or furnishings are top quali­ ty, offering a feeling of luxury

and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and grav­ eled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in show­ er units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bedroom duplex located in the popu­ lar area of Punta Prima, the property has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bedrooms, one with balcony, bathroom with dou­ ble shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

NOME CARE

44

Friday, September 6, 2013

Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apart­ ment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities includ­ ing the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Top floor Duplex. Very good price of 108.000 euros for a quick sale. Furnished to a very high standard, 2 bed­ rooms, 1 bathroom, Lounge Diner, Glazed in Porch, Large Roof Top Solarium.

Choice of Communal Pools, Private Parking. Walking distance to all amenities and on the First urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant.

Viewing essential. Ref No. K44. Tel. 627 711 155 Balsares is opposite Gran Alacant where the proposed golf course is now being started so this property will virtually be on the golf course, it is an investment not to be missed. The prop­ erty is on a small gated urbanisation of 18 houses with private underground parking for 2 cars and direct access to the house, com­ munal pool and toilets/changing rooms etc.

The house is brand new and consists of 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, lounge with working fire place, large kitchen 12 m2, large galle­

ria/ utility room, bedroom balcony and front tiled ter­ race. This property also has a converted under build for an extra lounge or bedroom. ref K52 €198,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off­road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool near­ by. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant Opportunity to purchase a beautiful 3 bed­ roomed, 3 bathroomed,large kitchen, detached property with roof­ top solarium. Well established gardens and drive way for 2 cars, whilst also overlooking the project­ ed 18 hole golf course.

Comprising of fitted wardrobes, utility room, air con H/C, alarm system, electric wall heaters, inter­ com system, fireplace, ceil­ ings fans, 8x7 gazebo, use of 2 large communal pools, immaculate condition with many extras. ref K12. €180,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant bargain, detached villa with pool on 400m2 plot. Briefly compris­ ing of 3 bedrooms, 3 bath­ rooms, Lounge Diner, inde­ pendent kitchen, solarium with views, well maintained gardens. Quiet location yet

MAN AND A VAN

within walking distance of all amenities. Top quality furni­ ture and appliances includ­ ed in the price. Extras include, mosquito nets, grills, toldos blinds, built in wardrobes, gas fire, electric heating, ceiling fans, English & Spanish TV, tastefully tiled & graveled garden with irri­ gation system. ref K43. €229,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bath­ room detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbaniza­ tion offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 dou­ ble beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Limited edition bungalow. Only six of this type available in Gran Alacant. Constructed in 2003 and immaculately maintained on a large plot size of 500m2 with a 10 x 5 pool.Comprising of 3 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­diner leading out onto front porch, independ­ ent kitchen including white

goods, outside galleria, court yard, large garage with electric door, roof top solari­ um and private parking. Also built in wardrobes, Toldos blinds, air con H/C, security grills, alarm, security doors, bathrooms heaters, outside toilet, outdoor lighting, irriga­ tion system, attractive and well kept gardens, beautiful­ ly tiled inside and out, fire place, English TV, phone line. Being sold with top quality furniture. ref L95. €275,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbaniza­ tion offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 dou­ ble beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Ground floor south west facing apartment in Puerto Marino close to G.A commercial centre, comprising of 2 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Lounge­Diner, Independent Kitchen with Galleria, Porch area and large tiled front garden, The property is being sold fully furnished and includes all kitchen appliances, H & C Air con is fitted as well as sky TV. The apartment enjoys the use of 2 large communal pools and has

PETS

private parking in an enclosed electronically gated car park.

Competitively priced for a quick sale. Ref. K40 €91,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant beautiful detached villa with very large pool and within walk­ ing distance to the Gran Alacant Commercial Centre.

This villa comprised of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner, Independent kitchen, roof top storage, solarium, porch & terrace.

Large private pool, BBQ area, established gardens and private terraces, Private Parking, Solarium with Views to Alicante. 450m2 plot, fully furnished including white goods. Located in very quiet desirable road. ref.L96. €255,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Gem! Fabulous detached Villa, with Alicante sea views to the front and wood land views to the rear, means this immaculate villa is very pri­ vate and un­overlooked.

Comprising of 2 large bed­ rooms with fitted wardrobes, 2 bath, large fully equipped kitchen,glazed porch sitting area, solarium, Attractive Pool with cover, well main­ tained Gardens. Central Heating, Air Con, Ceiling fans, Private Parking, Alarm system, Decorative working Fire Place complete with electric Fire. Outdoor work­ shop/storage area, Quality Pergola & BBQ. Constructed in 2006, on plot size of 380m2 and being sold fully furnished including white goods. ref L80. €234,995 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Rare invest­ ment!! corner south facing opportunity on Novamar

PERSONAL

urbanisation.This immacu­ late ground floor duplex has been kept and maintained to a very high standard inside and out the position is fan­ tastic, enjoys views over the lovely oasis communal pool, surrounded by lawned gar­ dens. Comprising of plot size 100m2 Build Size 90m2, 2 bedrooms, 2 bath­ rooms, fully furnished, Anti­ Glare Windows, Security Door, Security Grills, Built­in Wardrobes, Extra Storage, Galleria, Electric Panel Heaters, Heated Towel Rails, Air Con (h&c), Ceiling.

Fans. Thermo Shower, Vanity Units and decorative­ ly tiled throughout, exquisite garden, Underground pri­ vate parking.

Ref.K10 €139,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the central area of Gran Alacant and within walking distance to all local ameni­ ties such as a selection of different cuisine restaurants, bars, pharmacies, banks, popular GA market and Carabassi Beach.

Comprises of 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms with a private garage and roof­top solari­ um. This property is part of a small urbanization which has the use of a large deco­ rative communal pool. Ref. K36 €149,000 Tel 680333242 Ground floor duplex, with splendid views. Quiet loca­ tion in Gran Alacant.

Immaculate condition. Price has just been reduced to 105.000 and includes every­ thing. For viewing call 627 711 155 Ref. No K27 Gran Alacant detached villa with converted under build and pool. Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge­ Diner, Front Porch, Large Solarium, decorative­

POOL TABLES

DAMP PROOFING

PLUMBERS

DRAINAGE

POOLS

45

Friday, September 6, 2013 ly tiled, Irrigated Garden.

BBQ and Log Storage Cupboard. Raised walls for Privacy. Also many extras, toldos blinds, freshly deco­ rated interior, Grills, Mosquito Nets, Air Con H/C, Ceiling Fans, Log Burner Fire, Electric Radiators, Heated Towel Rails, Alarmed, Phone Line, Satellite UK TV, private parking. Plot size 310m2 under build 100m2. price includes all furniture.The under build consists of 2 beds, lounge, kit/utility room. ref L79. €250,000 Tel. 680333242 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant immaculate outstanding south facing villa in sought after road. Set on a 350m2 plot with 4 bed­ rooms, 3 baths,large porch, solarium and terraces. The large under build includes a lounge, kitchen, bedrooms, bathroom and patio doors leading to pool area. Internal & external access for under build. Extras include electric radiators, air con H/C, ceil­ ing fans, gas fire, heated towel rails, extended walk­in shower, fitted wardrobes.

Decorative tiling inside and out.

Panoramic views towards Alicante Bay, Sky TV, phone line and Internet & Private parking, estab­ lished gardens, water fea­ tures and fruit trees. Being sold with exquisite furniture and all white goods.

Immaculate finishes and decor. ref L84. €278,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Large detached villa with beautiful gardens set on 550m2 plot, built in BBQ area and large 10x6 pool.Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner with fire place, Independent Kitchen, air con H/C, Solarium, front porch, converted under build with 3 extra rooms, private covered parking, irrigated gardens, close distance to beach and amenities. Ref. K18 €250,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge­diner, independent kitchen, full roof­top solari­ um with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed,

SURVEYOR

STORAGE

REMOVALS

4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appli­ ances & furniture also there is a utility room, open ter­ race, and private parking.

The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, ten­ nis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul­de­sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gar­ dens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,pri­ vate parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref.

L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more.

125.000 Euros Ref No. K23.

Tel. 627 711 155

Gran Alacant, Situated front line to the famous blue flag beaches of Carabassi, the real beauty of this property is its proximity to the beach, but also on offer is a fantas­ tic communal pool situated in beautifully kept gardens with little Spanish walk ways.Comprising of 2 bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, American style kitchen including all appliances, roof top solarium with stunning views, front porch area with front garden and a secure underground garage. fully furnished Ref. K23 €125,000 rare opportunity Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever con­ structed­ Very large 5 bed­ rooms, 4 bathroom(2 en­ suit) property, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room.

Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation sys­ tem and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished. Within walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and 5 minute drive to

TRANSLATOR

RAG AND BONE

Carabassi beaches. ref.

K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bed­ rooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge­diner, fully equipped kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with established low mainte­ nance very private gardens with irrigation system, elec­ tronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosquito nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with separate Jacuzzi section.

Within easy walking dis­ tance to Gran Alacant com­ mercial centre and close to local bus and tram route.

Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with working fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops, private pool, plot of 550m2, established irrigated gar­ dens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished.

Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south­facing, very private villa, with wood­ land and Alicante views.

Situated at the end of a small cul­de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and stor­ age in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of out­ side parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­ master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

Tel:­ 664 838 581

REMOVALS

VAN HIRE

Move It Now Small removals and deliveries.

Spain/UK Budget prices.

Last minute jobs undertak­ en. www.moveitnow.co.uk Telephone UK 0800 612 4922 or Spain 678 756 644 (131)

SITUATIONS VACANT RADIO COSTA INTERNA­ TIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential.

Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainterna­ tional.com Medaesthetics require a Beautician. Must have NVQ Level 3 and working self employed email cv to sabinebrooks@hotmail.com

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your prob­ lems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer dif­ ferent Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are wel­ come to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (90)

WANTED

46

Friday, September 6, 2013

Greenside Gossip FAMILY MISFORTUNES IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

Sometimes when you play this lovely game, you have to wonder what‘s going on in our golfing world with what you see on the course. When I was playing the other day, I witnessed something that took my breath away.

No, it was not a 25 year old well developed female streaker, but it was a family fourball!

“Well, there is nothing wrong with that!” I can hear you retort. Well, this family consisted of a father, dressed in cut off denims and beach sandals; his shirt was a normal one which was unbuttoned displaying his bare torso. The mother was wearing flip flops and was not dressed much better, and they were both playing with one set of clubs. But if that was not enough, their children aged around about four or five years were running on the fairways and then allowed to use the putter on the greens. When the male golfer saw us on an adjacent buggy path, he promptly buttoned up his shirt, all this of going on while a single golfer was being made to wait.

We were a fourball and we were also being delayed.

It then brought to mind another incident I was unfortunate to witness at another course some time ago, when a man and his wife took to the fairways in a buggy, complete with two sets of clubs. Their off spring was in another buggy but this time it was a baby type complete with a parasol.

Now I am not saying that families should not get involved in golf or introduce their young children to the game, but there have to be standards and one of those is respecting the course that has been so lovingly and financially invested in.

There is also the respect to other fee paying golfers. It starts in the caddy master office or hotel, where a check should as to the player’s ability, as well as the attire including golf shoes and their knowledge of the sport. We should not forget the number of players actually playing. If it’s two, then they should hire two sets of clubs.

In my first case here, the family were treating a quality golf course as if it was a fairground pitch and putt with endless ramifications. The bunkers were not raked and facilities abused by children who know no better when wielding clubs.

TITTER ON THE TEE One day, a housework­challenged husband decided to wash his golf shirt. Seconds after he stepped into the utility room, he shouted, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'

'It depends,' the wife replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'

He shouted back, ' La Manga Golf Club!'

And they say blondes are dumb.

What would happen if the kids got hit by a stray golf ball with the likelihood of no insurance? Hopefully these are one­ off incidents and by good policing it will remain as such.

Directors of Golf please take note.

WOULD A PGA EUROPEAN TAKEOVER BE GOOD NEWS?

PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem and European Tour chief George O’Grady say reports that the American tour wants to take over its European counterpart are incorrect.

While the reports may have been denied, there appear to be significant reasons why both tours would want to partner up in the years to come.

It seems that the reports have some significance, as a merger between the two tours would appear to have finan­ cial benefit to both sides. The European Tour does not have the kind of capital backing that the American tour has, and it's often difficult for European golfers to play consistently when purses don't compare with those of American tourna­ ments. By joining with the more stable PGA Tour, the European Tour would improve its ability to offer higher purs­ es on a consistent basis.

The PGA Tour does not have the impact in Asia and other emerging markets that the European Tour has at this point.

By merging or taking over the European Tour in a buyout, the PGA Tour would immediately have a much greater foot­ print in Asia than it does now.

While the PGA Tour is behind in that area in 2013, it may not always be in the position of No. 2. Since the PGA Tour has a stronger financial position than the European Tour, it could just allow market conditions to determine the future course of Asian golf in general—and Chinese golf in partic­ ular. If that happened, the motivation behind the move for the PGA could be to gain a foothold in China and a slice of the profits from the cash­rich Ryder Cup, which they are cur­ rently missing out on.

European golf tends to struggle in the weeks surrounding major golf tournaments in the United States. While PGA Tour golfers played for huge purses, the European Tour has been dark.

There are so many good things about the European Tour and it can be such an unbelievable product given the places we go to, and the players we have. But we are so far from maximizing what we have and we need to freshen things up.

But a takeover or a merger of the two tours has drawbacks as well. One is the clear identity that each tour has. When the Ryder Cup is contested every two years, the European Tour represents the European golfers while the PGA of America—a different entity from the PGA Tour—represents the American players.

If the PGA Tour took over both tours, it would run the entire Ryder Cup. While the competition would still be Europe vs. the United States, it might lack some of the passion that cur­

rently is a big part of the event. Additionally, when the sport has two distinct organizations to push each other, advance­ ments in the game are much more likely to continue.

American golfers put more effort into winning when they have been trounced in the Ryder Cup, while Europeans push back that much harder if American golfers win the British Open. That kind of motivation could disappear if the PGA Tour took over the European Tour.

While leadership from both tours denies that a merger is afoot, there is simply too much money involved for both sides to run from it much longer. That may not be the best thing for the competitive aspect of the sport, but it can cer­ tainly line the pockets of the executives and the players, and that's why it's likely to happen sooner or later.

This week, the PGA Tourists play for a pot of $8 million, of which the winner will receive just slightly less than the entire pot for the European Tour’s Johnnie Walker Championship at Gleneagles. The European Tour now finds itself in a tough position as it struggles to find sponsors and to stage tourna­ ments with any real value. The loss of McIlroy, Westwood, Garcia et al has ravaged the field strength in European Tour events and the end of season cash bonanza in Dubai is now threatened by an impending financial crisis over there.

KNOW YOUR RULES QUESTION Before making his first stroke on the 3rd tee, Roger moves one of the tee markers because it interferes with his stance.

What is the ruling?

A: There is no penalty.

B: Roger is penalised two strokes.

C: Roger is disqualified.

ANSWER B: Roger is penalised two strokes (Rule 13.2)

47

Friday, September 6, 2013

WINE, WOMEN AND WHAT’S THE ODDS?

IF you believe that today’s footballers are very fit, dedicated young men with no place in their overpaid, pampered lives for alcohol, either after training or match­ es, and the bad, boozy days of Best, Adams, Gazza et al are behind us, then that’s good, isn’t it?

And perhaps the sextra­curricular revela­ tions, like George, Wayne and Ryan are few and far between the broad sheets today, then that’s good too ­ no? But they say there’s another deadly vice out there, creep­ ing through the beautiful game like a malig­ nant malaise, right before our very eyes in full public view. I refer to gambling: big time.

The successful footballers of today are too well­paid, with too much spare time – not a good match of the day. Footballers betting is nothing new, from the sixties they have always earnt well and gambled heavily ­ Bestie, Stan Bowles, and Paul Merson. But what is a recent innovation is the consum­ mate ease of how to quickly and quietly splash out vast amounts of cash electroni­ cally, always with temptingly­advantageous odds of course. These often thrust publicly right onto our own goggle boxes just before

big matches by reputable leading bookmak­ ers – e.g. Ladbrokes ­ van Persie to score next ­ 11 to 1. Lost £50 ­ £100? We­ ell, you can afford it, no­one’ll know ­ plenty more where that came from, eh?

Modern ex­footballer Dominic Matteo’s 2011 autobiography ‘In My Defence’ details his £1m gambling problem: "You used to have to walk into the bookies to get your bet on and in a place like Leeds everyone would soon know if you started putting big money on. But with telephone accounts and text betting you can do it privately. No one's the wiser. There's no prying eyes and bookmak­ ers guard your secrecy. With drinking or womanising, you'd be in the papers but bet­ ting is one of the few vices footballers can have without it getting around."

Cheers Dom. But hey, gambling is very addictive, and addiction of any vice is dan­ gerous. Luckily I caught an early financial cold in a forces card school, which taught me how easy it was to suddenly part with money I could ill­afford to lose, and today I just play the harmless Grand National game for the sake of losing a risky fiver. Are you like me, tailor­made for bookies to make

their money, not really knowing what you’re doing odds­wise, with no horse sense to prevent your money going straight to the dogs?

Back to the big league: I’ve never been a fan of Gordon Taylor, who’s represented the toothless Professional Footballers Association ever since Pontius was a pilot.

The PFA head is one of the highest­paid union officials in the world, with a million pound­plus salary. Recent revelations have emerged that players’ figurehead Taylor owes a six­figure sum in horse­racing debts to one company alone. In addition he allegedly spent £4m on 2,000 bets in 30 months, including thousands of bets on Premier League matches.

In 2010, Taylor had the gall to call for a 'zero tolerance' approach to footballers' gambling – the same sap who is said to have lost £15,000 alone when England failed to beat Switzerland in 2011. Gordon a good gaffer, guys? ‘Gordon is a moron’ runs the old pop song... (Funny question: does the Chief Executive have ‘advisors’ in the know? Because if he does, they’re not very good). Finally: even more worrying in today’s game is the highly­dangerous prac­ tice of match­fixing, linked to massive bet­ ting syndicates, currently under investigation here in Spain – now that’s a really grave offence and an insult to everyone in the beautiful game. Bet they can’t prove it, though!

GAZ HITS THE JACKPOT Over 20 thousand Real Madrid fans said hello to their world record signing Gareth Bale on Monday.

His 100 million Euros move from Tottenham ended a long summer saga, with the Welsh strik­ er getting a rapturous reception from the Bernabeu Stadium faithful.

Speaking in Spanish, the 24­year­old told fans: "It is a dream to be here in Madrid. Thank you for this welcome." After a short address in Spanish and English, Bale was joined on stage by his family, including baby daughter

Alba Violet, for photo­ graphs, before heading off to change into his new kit.

Acknowledging applause from the terraces, Bale reappeared to show off his skills on the pitch, and kicked numerous footballs into the stands. With fans chanting his name, he kissed the badge on his shirt and lashed a left­ footed s h o t into the net.

All the two’s for Torry

Last gasp elche level Elche produced a late late show in the early hours of Saturday morning to steal a point from fellow La Liga newcomers, Almeria. Five minutes into injury time, new signing Richmond Boayke struck from the penalty spot to give Elche their second point of the season in a 2­2 smash and grab at Almeria.

Almeria took an early lead through Fernando Soriano only for Edu Albacar to equalise from the spot following Sebastian Dubarbier's handball. The hosts regained the lead on the stroke of half­time when Jose Antonio Verza converted a spot­kick follow­ ing Cristian Sapunaru's handball.

Almeria appeared to be heading for victo­ ry, despite Dubarbier's second­half dismissal after receiving his second yellow card, before Boakye struck to leave both sides

Two league matches have seen two draws for FC Torrevieja, and in hot conditions, they did well to come back from being behind twice, to take a 2­2 Sunday lunchtime draw at Llosa.

Torrevieja had the bet­ ter of the early exchanges, but Campos put the home side into the lead. The visitors though deservedly equalised through a powerful Valdeolivas header. Llosa went ahead shortly after half­time, as Torry’s defenders failed to clear from their six yard area, and Nolo managed to scramble the ball over the line. The home side were quick­ ly pegged back courtesy of a wonderful indi­ vidual effort from the experienced Carrasco,

creating something out of nothing to blast the ball into the net, having started from a totally unpromising position and with two large defenders to beat.

The visitors dominated the rest of an entertain­ ing match, and were unlucky not have got their first win of the sea­ son.

Torrevieja entertain Elche tomorrow (Saturday) in a premi­ um friendly at the Vicente Garcia stadi­ um, kicking off at 7.00pm. It’s a major fund­raiser for the club with tickets priced between 10 and 12 Euros.

Sunday’s scheduled home league game against CF Torre Levante will now be played this Monday with a 6.00pm start

CD Montesinos have their final pre­sea­ son friendly tomorrow night (Saturday) as they entertain San Fulgencio with a 7.00pm kick off. The squad will officially be present­

ed to the supporters as well. The first league match is away to Benijofar a week on Sunday.

MONTE’S BUILD UP

searching for their first win.

Elche return to La Liga action a week on Sunday when they entertain Valladolid with a 5.00pm kick off.

Friday, September 6, 2013

48

ENGLAND EXPECTS… …TO BE THERE IN BRAZIL NEXT SUMMER FOR THE FIFA WORLD CUP!

Well, yes, we’re all agreed (Celts excepted), but we’re not certain of qualifying yet. There’s one or two big, dangerous foreign hurdles to clear first, with the odd banana skin about. England now tackle two of the hurdles, the first tonight at Wembley against Moldova (kick off at 9pm Spanish time), the second on Tuesday away to Ukraine.

Here’s the current picture: 1. Montenegro: ­ Played 7 and 14 points 2. England: ­ Played 6 and 12 points 3. Ukraine: ­ Played 6 and 11 points 4. Poland: ­ Played 6 and 9 points 5. Moldova: ­ Played 7 and 5 points 6. San Marino: ­ Played and 0 points Thanks to recently favourable ‘other’ results, England can now control their own destiny, where the top two qualify. Yes, England does expect a win against mod­ est Moldova tonight and then again on Tuesday, but even a draw would be OK against the ugly Ukraine in hostile, dangerous Kiev. Then next month some more serious stuff surmises for Hodgson’s heroes in

John McGregor reports

October where England can qualify with two consecu­ tive­but­difficult home games, firstly against current leaders Montenegro on October 11th, followed by old enemies Poland, also at Wembley four days later to conclude the qualifying stages.

Let’s hope it doesn’t all come down to needing a win against Poland. I’m sure many older, red­blooded Englishmen will shudder with me, remembering back to 1973 when we drew 1 – 1 at Wembley, with the Polish goalkeeper Tomaszewski – who Brian Clough agonis­ ingly labelled a clown ­ performing miracles under siege to keep England out. The Poles scored a break­ away goal ­ and England didn’t qualify.

The current influx of foreign players into the Premiership can be viewed as worrying, to be stifling young home­grown talent: conversely as we see play­ ers like Gareth Bale (yes, OK Taffs, I know he’s Welsh) coming through the ranks of Southampton and Spurs to suddenly shatter the world transfer record and come to Spain this week, the reverse is also happening (not bad for a gangly full­back!).

Wayne Rooney is scratched out for these two crucial games, along with Phil Jones and Glen Johnson, but we’ve got plenty of good English talent to call on, including players who are bang in form, albeit some of it untried at international level, like 21 year­old Cardiff defender Steven Caulker. Excellent potential for Brazil

– if we get there. Red­hot Liverpool striker Daniel Sturridge is expected to be fit to start, but unsurpris­ ingly his manager Brendan Rodgers is verbally biting his nails in case the Reds gravy train is internationally derailed: "He has struggled in the last couple of games and we need to think of Liverpool first": Struggled?

Three goals in consecutive games? Spoken like a true Irishman, Bren, cheers.

After a dream debut scoring against Scotland with his first touch, it would be great to see Ricky Lambert start for England against Moldova in Wayne’s place, possi­ bly launching a run in an England shirt for this late starter who helped Southampton gain promotion and stay in the prestigious Prem. With Danny Welbeck and Theo Walcott both scoring in the same match, and newbie Jack Wilshere blending with oldie Steven Gerrard in midfield, there is much to be excited about tonight, a game for England to warm up for unfriendly Ukraine, against a team going nowhere – but playing for pride against the mighty England. If you take a long, hard look at the group, then we should qualify as a major footballing power in the world today. The recent rousing 2 – 2 draw against Brazil, plus the goals against spirited Scotland show England are in good shape under Roy Hodgson. As King Henry the Fifth might have cried in Shakespearian style: ­ “God for Harry, England – and baby George!”