Week 143

Edition 143

www.thecourier.es

Friday, November 15, 2013

BIG MAMA’S GANG

“Fat Woman” leads Poppy cash crooks

By ALEX TRELINSKI Heartless thieves stole Poppy collection boxes just before Remembrance Day, with an East European gang sweeping through shops and businesses in the San Luis and La Siesta areas of Torrevieja, in addition to the Lemon Tree Road area in Guardamar and Rojales.

Courier reader, Peter Scott, said that they started to wreak havoc last Friday lunchtime (November 8th) in San Luis by tak­ ing Poppy boxes after

distracting counter­staff and business owners, led by what he described as a “big fat woman”.

Craig Stafford of La Bodega in San Luis had his collection box stolen which had at least 100 Euros in it and explained what happened: ­ “It was around 11.30 and a big woman along with two others came into my shop. She produced a 200 Euro note wanting to buy just a couple of small bottles.

I refused to take the note, but then she produced a 100 Euro note, and during our discussion over it, I had been distracted and one of her associates took the box. It was a classic bit of distraction along with a scam over the high value notes”.

Customers at La Bodega quickly rallied round and raised a new collection, but Craig is not taking the matter any further.

“It’s a waste of time of ringing the Guardia Civil. They won’t turn up or do anything at all about it”.

The Policia Local in Torrevieja were told about the spate of thefts by the Council’s Foreign Resident’s director, Graham Knight, but it is down to each individual bar or restaurant owner to issue a denuncia in per­ son at the Guardia Civil. They are reluctant to do so because of the time consuming process involved and also not being able to declare the exact amount in each stolen box.

The Courier received verified reports that the three women appeared to be non­ Spanish and appeared to be of East European origin with some reports describ­ ing them as gypsies. One of them went to the Razor’s Edge hairdressers in San Luis before striking at La Bodega, and asked about the price of a haircut, whilst clearly trying to observe what was in the salon, but took nothing. Other businesses were not so lucky and had their poppy boxes stolen, with up to 10 shops around the Torrevieja area being affected, with the “fat” woman leading

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Are you a snapper? Do you have a great photo? Send it to design@thecourier.es and if we think it is good enough we will publish it as our Picture of the Week TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 965 99 66 66 E­MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon ­ Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Alex Trelinski CONSULTANT EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Donna Tel 616 332 178 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Tony Mayes John McGregor

Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

Ficus Tree, Cartagena. Nature at her paternalistic best. Photo by ROBERT W BARNES.

YOUR MOTHER WOULDN’T LIKE IT A little bit of what you fancy was what attract­ ed some 9 thousand people to this year’s Alicante Erotic Festival at Elche’s IFA centre.

Those who came last weekend were treated to parades, strip tease shows, mud wrestling and areas for swingers.

That was in addition to private shows for small groups, plus shopping and advice over toys, lingerie, and various accessories.

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Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non­appearance of any advertisement, although all advertise­ ments produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re­publi­ cation will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertise­ ment. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

Torrevieja Council is to ask the Alicante Province Council for close to half a million Euros to improve the walkway at Punta Margalla. Torrevieja would find 600 thousand Euros from its own budget which would improve the boardwalk between Los Locos and Cura beaches. Improved lights and seating are also in the plan.

BIG MAMA’S GANG Continued from page 1 from the front in many cases.

The following day, a couple described as Romanian or Bulgarian went with a child into Casa Ventura in San Luis at around 1.00pm, and stole a mobile phone after one of the bar staff was distracted. Kevin Robertson from Casa Ventura told The Courier: ­ “These people tried to pay for 2 or 3 bottles of beer with a 200 Euro note and we were not hav­ ing it. Amidst our row with them, they took the mobile phone of one of our female staff.

There were too many customers around the poppy box for them to steal it. There was no

On the boardwalk

NO INFLATION

Spain’s inflation rate has hit zero. October’s official figures from the National Statistics Institute has now raised the possibility of doubt that they were trying to scam us”.

The worst monetary case involved a deflation hitting the country, Torrevieja area restaurant which does not which last happened in 2009 want to be identified. They staged a mid­ when prices fell for 8 months week cheese and wine party for the Poppy in a row.

Appeal with some 400 Euros being raised and put into the box, which was discovered BEATEN UP “missing” on the Saturday.

A 72 year old Elche busi­ The Poppy Appeal co­ordinator for the nessman has been badly Torrevieja branch of the Royal British beaten up by 4 masked Legion, Grahame Ward said: ­ “A lot of peo­ thugs in his apartment ple are understandably very upset with all building on Calle Porta de the hard work that has gone into the Poppy la Morera in the city. The Appeal”. victim was found uncon­

scious on the third floor on Wednesday morning, after a neighbour inter­ rupted the assault, as he was about to use the lift.

The assailants turned their attention to him and tried to choke him, but the 19 year old man escaped their clutches and called the police. The motivation of the robbers may have been to steal various art­ works that the business­ man owned, but they fled empty handed.

WANTED – MORE HEADLINE NEWS! DO YOU have a story that might grab the headlines?

What’s all the gossip about round your way? A spate of robberies, perhaps – or maybe you’ve spotted a celebrity in the neighbourhood. Whether your news involves fire, police, ambulance, accidents – or hap­

pier events like family weddings (particularly Golden and Diamond ones!), Just phone the Courier office on 966 921 003 or email office@thecourier.es We’re waiting for your call…and next week’s Front Page story.

Friday Showers High 13 Low 7° Chance of rain 61% Monday Partly cloudy High 15 Low 9° Chance of rain 0%

Tuesday Partly cloudy High 19° Low 8° Chance of rain 0%

Saturday Showers High 15° Low 9° Chance of rain 56% Wednesday Partly cloudy High 16° Low 5° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Showers High 14° Low 8° Chance of rain 50% Thursday Cloudy High 15° Low 5° Chance of rain 0%

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Friday, November 15, 2013

UNLUCKY 13

TIME TO REMEMBER

The Torrevieja branch of the Royal British Legion commemorated Armistice Day on Monday, at the La Siesta Evangelical Church, with their annual Service of Remembrance. The event was attended by local dignitaries led by Torrevieja’s Mayor, Eduardo Dolon, with the service led by Torrevieja’s Anglican chaplain, Christopher Scargill. The Mayor thanked the organisers for the invitation to the ceremony and emphasised the impor­ tance for such an occasion for the British community that lives in and round the city.

Bad news for rabbits

13 is the unlucky number for the latest bunch of British criminals thought to be hiding from justice in Spain. The latest list under Operation Captura has just been published by Crimestoppers and the National Crime Agency, which until now has seen 53 of the 63 named villains being brought to book.

The new list of shame includes Ian Stanton who is a suspected ringleader of a cocaine smuggling ring which saw

more than 400kg of drugs hidden in a shipment of frozen Argentinian beef; Michael McCartney who committed sex offences against under­age boys over a number of years; and Robert Mortby who’s accused of attempted murder in London last year.

For a full list of the 13 individuals fea­ tured as part of the campaign, you can visit www.crimestoppers­uk.org/opcap­ tura.

Trafico appointment shocker The days of motorists queuing up at Trafico offices in Alicante, Cartagena or Murcia are over.

Spain’s traffic body, the DGT, has now introduced an appointments system for driving license matters. After test­dri­ ving appointments at a variety of centres around the country, Trafico has rolled out the idea nationwide, and you can book a session via their website, www.dgt.es or by calling them on the 060 number.

Big gang stopped An international drug trafficking and prostitution gang has been smashed with 73 people being arrest­ ed, 39 of which were in Spain. The Guardia Civil and the National Police co­operated with the authorities in Greece and Turkey to make their arrests which included the Valencia region, as well as Madrid, Catalonia, Andaluscia, Galicia and the Canary Islands. Illegal immigrants were being transported from the Dominican Republic through to Greece and Turkey where they were given fake documents, before being transferred to Spain.

The rare Iberian Lynx species is set to spread to new homes across Spain, and that’s not good for wild rabbits, which is their main food.

This year 19 lynx (all born in captivity and reintroduced into the wild) were reintroduced into rural areas in Cordoba, Jaen and Sevilla. Their population has grown this season, with 44 cubs being born in captivity, and now they are ready to start new lives around Spain. From the spring of next year, the lynx will be taken to new habitats in Toledo, Badjoz, Ciudad Real and Sevilla.

The areas set for reintroduction have been thoroughly studied, ensuring there is enough wild prey to sustain the felines, and that the areas are far from busy roads, to avoid the lynx being run over, which is a common occurrence in the Doñana Natural Park where the main population of the creatures exists in Spain.

New dimension Poachers tentacled

The award­winning Torrevieja Hospital has notched up another first. It’s become the only hospital in Alicante Province to use 3D surgery in gynaecological operations like in ovarian cysts or hysterectomies. The new techniques fea­ ture a 3D video camera, and like in home or cinema viewing, a 3D screen is used along with special glasses for all of the operating theatre team. The use of 3D will allow more com­ plex operations to be carried out in Torrevieja with far greater precision.

New address

Ex­Torrevieja Mayor, Hernandez Mateo, is set to appear in court this Monday (November 18th) for the for­ mal committal ahead of the start of his 3 year jail stretch.

The former Mayor was given his sentence after being found guilty of forgery and corruption over a waste col­ lection contract back in 2004.

3 fishing poachers have been nabbed by the Guardia Civil in San Pedro del Pinatar, and their booty of 35 kilos of illegal­ ly caught octopus impounded. A Guardia surveillance boat spotted the clandestine fishermen operating without a license and for fishing in unauthorised water. There was good news in that the octopus was donated to charity, after being passed fit to eat.

Elche’s weevil fight Elche is upping its palm tree inspections on the city’s roads in 2014 in the continuing battle against red palm weevil. Opponents on the council say that the ruling administration has launched a series of action plans this year without doing anything practical.

Councillor Manuel Rodriguez responded by saying that 99.9% of the historic palms are weevil­free and that there have only been 4 infections found within the UNESCO protected area. Public awareness cam­ paigns will be stepped up and council employees will be given extra training in spotting the dreaded weevil.

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Friday, November 15, 2013

TORRY ARSON

A 34 year old Spaniard has been arrested over 2 arson attacks in the Torrevieja area. One of the blazes was at his ex­girlfriend’s home, who was there at the time at La Ceñuela with his son as well as 2 other children and their babysitter. They all managed to escape unhurt, helped by a neighbour. According to the Guardia Civil, the incident happened a fortnight ago in the early hours of November 1st with the man then setting fire to their former shared home in San Luis, most of which was destroyed.

FOSSILS RETURN

Murcia’s Museum of Palaeontology, whose foun­ dation stone was laid in September 2010 by the region’s President Ramón Luis Valcárcel, will see work re­start on building it in March or April 2014, accord­ ing to Torre Pacheco Mayor, Antonio Madrid. The building close to Balsicas on the San Javier to Murcia road had its construction stopped back in February due to a lack of money. More than 4 million Euros has so far been spent on the project, with a tenta­ tive opening date of 2015.

BAA----D NEWS

30 dead sheep along with other animal bones have been discov­ ered by the Guardia Civil in the Rambla Salada area of Murcia.

Guardia agents are trying to find out whether the animals had died of malnutrition and whether animal welfare and water laws have been broken by the farmer who had dumped them there. He was identi­ fied with some the animals having ID tags on them.

A camouflaged green­ house in the Murcia town of El Fenzar near Molina has been raided by the National Police who seized over a thousand marijuana plants. 7 people were arrested, who used 2 cottages for process­ ing the drug. The marijuana was grown in the green­ house, with the gang trying to hide them between tomato plants. 270 grams of hasish and a shotgun was also seized with all 7 Spaniards charged with public health offences.

ON A HIGH

LA PEDRERA MOVE

Three conservation groups want the La Pedrera Reservoir to be classified as a wetland in the Valencia region’s directory of wetlands. The body of water next to Torremendo is said to have two protected species of heron that use the area in the

winter, along with a wide range of water­ based birds that use the reservoir all year round. The groups have written to authorities in Alicante to lobby for La Pedrera to be given the new wetland new status.

Dead for just 300 euros A man who stabbed a Torrevieja bar owner to death 9 years ago has been given a 10 year jail sentence by an Elche court. The incident in the early hours of April 30th 2004 saw the bar owner, 45 year old Manuel Granja, knifed repeatedly to steal his takings which amounted to just 300 Euros from his business, Casa Manuel in Torrevieja. His wife was also injured, and the prison sentence was ator and local hotel and apartment own­ reduced after the murdered confessed to his deed ers which will take advantage of new back in 2012. flights between Alicante­Elche airport and Warsaw which will run at the height of the summer season.

POLES NOT APART

Guardamar tourist chiefs closed a deal at the recent World Tourism Market in London which will see more Polish visi­ tors coming to the area. A contract has been signed between a Polish tour oper­

EXTRA HOT

A Murcia factory specialis­ ing in producing and distrib­ uting smoked Spanish papri­ ka, got more heat than it bar­ gained for on Sunday, as it went up in flames.

Firefighters were called to the blaze at the Pimursa plant just outside Murcia city at Cabeza de Torres, where paprika and chilli powder were part of the concoction that was on fire. Dampening down work continued on the

Monday, with the firemen reporting a strong odour of

paprika on their clothes on returning to their station.

NICE TO AFFORD IT

The former boss of the failed CAM Bank has left jail after posting bail of 1.5 million Euros. National Court Judge, Javier Gomez Bermudez ordered the bond last week after Roberto López Abad was taken into custody after being arrested for his alleged part in an embezzlement scandal involving money laundering via luxury hotels in Central America.

FAIR ENOUGH

Orihuela has become the first place in the Valencia region to be given the status of a “Fair Trade” city.

Certificates were presented at a ceremony with local businesses and voluntary groups being recognised for their work in helping the dis­ advantaged both locally and internationally.

ELCHE ROBBERS

6 men have been arrested by the National Police for robbing at least 8 chalets and cottages in the Elche area. The Vega Baja based gang, aged between 20 and 33, specialised in breaking down fences and other security systems, before carrying

out their thefts, often with the home own­ ers asleep. All the arrested, barring 1 Moroccan, were Spanish, with 3 of them being apprehended in Elche whilst the rest were rounded up in Los Montesinos, Dolores, and Almoradi.

San Javier tapas run

The San Javier Tapas Run which starts today(Friday) has gone high­tech with your chance to vote for your favourite snack via a mobile phone app in addition to the traditional written verdict! A record number of over 30 bars and restaurants will be taking part in the event with each nibble and drink costing just 2 Euros.

Friday, November 15, 2013

Local thieves collared The National Police have smashed a 40 strong gang committing a string of rob­ beries around Alicante Province, in addition to Valencia and Barcelona.

The cops have arrested 40 suspects, half of them in the Alicante region, and impounded over 2 thousand marijuana plants that were grown in a warehouse, along with over halogen lamps in Sabadell in Catalunya.

Operation Crescent was co­ordinated by the Police in Alicante, and they said they had confiscated 43 knives in addition to a shotgun and a revolver. 18 of those arrested had criminal records and committed burglaries from all kinds of shops and houses. Mobile phone jam­ mers were also recovered in addition to stolen jewellery, as well as stamp and coin collections.

The police started their dragnet back in

June as they followed up a string of rob­ beries across Alicante Province, and arrested 15 Spanish people, and raided 9 homes. Inquiries uncovered that the gang were operating further afield, and this led to more arrests locally as well as further afield. Besides the arrested Spaniards, 6 Ecuadorians, 2 Libyans, 2 Algerians, a Romanian, an Indian, and a Pakistani have also been hauled in.

EX-TORRY COUPLE PAY THE PRICE

A pair of fraudsters who owned an apartment in Torrevieja have been brought to justice in a British court after ripping off the UK benefits system to the tune of £16,000.

Married couple Michael and Sylvia Plumridge from the village of Sonning in Wokingham failed to tell benefit officials that Mrs.Plumridge owned prop­ erty in Torrevieja where they both lived before moving back to the UK in 2010.

After their return to Britain, the pair claimed a string of benefits including pension credit and housing and council tax benefit, whilst keeping details of Sylvia’s Spanish property and her private NHS pen­ sion a secret from benefit officials. They even applied for and were granted a council property, claiming

they had nowhere else to live.

As a result of failing to declare their true circum­ stances to the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP), the Plumridges were sentenced at Reading Magistrates Court to a 12 month community order with 240 hours unpaid work, as well as being ordered to

pay back the benefit they had received fraudulently and a further £1,235 to cover the cost of the investi­ gation.

Julie Holland (pictured) of Wokingham Borough Council’s business assur­ ance team, who helped bring the fraudsters to jus­ tice, said, “With such a high demand for social housing and with taxpayers’ money being so tight, it is vitally important that we make sure that council houses and public money only go to those who really need it.

Every council property that goes to the wrong person costs the council tax payers of Wokingham Borough an extra £18,000. We will con­ tinue to go after fraudsters who think they can cheat the system and get away with it.”

Lions secretary, Iain Bennett on idsbennett@ hotmail.co.uk. Alternatively

you can go online on www.lionsclubs.org and fol­ low the instructions on how to donate directly.

All funds donated via Lions Clubs goes directly to provide aid, with no money wasted on administration or spurious expenses. If you want to donate directly to the Torrevieja Costa Lions Club account for the Philippines, the account number is IBAN ES88 2038 6012 4460 0014 6853.

Local lions help philippines

The Torrevieja Costa Lions club has linked up with Lions clubs around the world to help those affected by Typhoon Haiyan which has ravaged the Philippines.

Money is being used to help the area via the Lions Clubs International Foundation, and with 12 thousand Lions members in the Philippines, they are coming together to help everybody. If you want to donate money, then you can contact the Torrevieja

Walk this way

Naturalists had a treat in San Pedro del Pinatar last Sunday as the council staged its first conducted winter walk on the Coterillo path through the Salinas and Arenales park. Bird­ lovers enjoyed checking out the various species, with the walk set to be repeated next on Sunday January 12th.

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Friday, November 15, 2013

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

The mystery cat of Ciudad Quesada I AM contacting you with regard to an unusual sighting of what I can only describe as a giant black feline prowling the hills of Ciudad Quesada.

On Sunday September 22, we were at a friend’s villa which sits atop the valley above the golf course. Just after arriving, we were sitting on the patio admiring the views and enjoying an aperitif when I spotted a sizeable 'Beast' roaming around the scrub­adorned rocks on the opposite side of the hill.

All 12 guests looked on in amaze­ ment. The sun was soon to set, so the dusky light added somewhat to this spooky experience. We had all agreed that this was no domestic cat. The animal was approximately

one metre long, with a short stubby tail. It looked to be jet black in colour and was of stocky build.

Next day, being curious as to what we had witnessed, my wife and I scoured the Internet until we found what could be the answer.

Could this really be one of the rarest wild cats in the world? The Iberian Lynx (pictured)?

The description of its habitat fits, and we believe the images online match the image of that eerie sil­ houette on the hill.

It would be very interesting to know if there have been any other sightings or reports of this strange beast around this area.

KEITH THOMPSON, El Rosa

ORIHUELA WASTE: THE GREEN FACTS IN reference to recent correspondence, it is cer­ tainly true that the green waste collection pres­ ents an ongoing problem in Orihuela Costa.

Ongoing because in past years the newspapers have been full of the same kind of photos and reports.

Orihuela Costa is one of the very few towns where green waste is allowed to be deposited on the street (with previous communication to the Town Hall). Unfortunately this attracts lorries from local garden companies and also from other municipalities to come and dump their green waste instead of bringing it where it belongs and where they would have to pay for elimination.

Streets cleaned of garden waste are surprisingly absolute­ ly full again two days later with piles that can never come from the gardens of those living there. Police investigation is taking place against those companies and corresponding fines will be issued, hoping this will stop others.

It is true that citizens pay taxes for this collection: 5,80€ per detached property per month, 1,35€ for other properties. This amount should be collected with the Aquagest bill, though it has been discovered recently that the majority of the houses in OC do not have it on their bill, or ever had. The matter is presently being investigated so that in the near future this municipal tax will be charged to everybody in order to fill the deficit existing in this department.

There is a revenue of about 130,000€ yearly for recycled material, but a town with the number of inhabitants of Orihuela should have at least 500,000€ from recycling. The recycled paper at present does not generate any income because in the containers designated to paper there is always ordinary waste.

The glass containers also do not generate the income they should, because on many occasions there is plastic etc. in them and therefore the company does not consider it as glass. The price that is paid for the elimination of the green waste very often is the one for "ordinary rubbish", which means far more than for green waste itself, because it is mixed with other kind of waste. Even the large grey contain­ ers most of the time contain all sorts of items, not only green waste.

OC should have an Ecoparque which was supposed to be put in place years ago under the previous government. The project has now been ordered and will be passed to public .

MARTINA SCHEURER, Excmo. Ayuntamiento Orihuela, Concejala Delegada de Costa, Playas y Residentes Internacionales

RE Mike Jobbins’ ‘A licence to drive you crazy’ (Issue 142), I’m sorry to hear it took you so long with many prob­ lems along the way.

Like it can be in the UK and in any form of employment, there will always be some­ one who could not give a monkey’s about doing their job properly and who is always willing to blame someone else for cock­ups .

In your case, Trafico Spain blamed DVLA UK and DVLA UK blamed Trafico Spain ­ who was to blame unfortu­ nately you will never know.

But in the end you finally did receive your Spanish licence.

We were obviously among the lucky ones. We did the changeover ourselves, went on line and printed out the necessary application, which indicated what other paper­ work we needed (copy of everything except the kitchen sink etc) and then proceeded to visit Trafico as follows: 1. Take a ticket when you arrive and wait for your num­ ber to show on the screen 2. Proceed to the window with your form 3. Pay the required fee 4. Sit back down and wait for your number to be shown on different screen 5. Proceed to the window with your duly stamped form showing you have paid and hand in all your documents

Your licence to license: How to end the Trafico v DVLA stand-off 6.

Go home and wait for your licence to arrive in the post, WHICH OURS DID WITHIN 3 weeks.

No disrespect to your 'gen­ tleman friend' but how much did he charge you and did he tick all the right boxes in the first place ?

You hear and see so many advertisements for "residen­ cia, health cards, driving licence etc ­ we can do it all and take the stress away for you". But you have to tell yourself if you want a job doing right, do it yourself ­ and it can be a lot cheaper too.

We did all the above our­ selves, residencia , padron, health card etc. The longest wait was for the health card but we still had cover whilst waiting for that to arrive.

LORRAINE (Simple.com) DELLA, Los Alcazares

The eyesore of San Miguel I HAVE read with interest the arti­ cles concerning the disgusting state of the streets in Orihuela Costa but no mention has ever been made about the filthy state of the roads linking San Miguel de Salinas with Villamartin and the urbanisations of Orihuela Costa.

Recently the verges have been cut, exposing roadsides totally cov­ ered with plastic bottles and rubbish of every description. Who are these

litter louts who toss every conceiv­ able type of garbage out of their cars to disfigure and mar the coun­ tryside?

Do these animals treat their own houses and gardens like a giant rub­ bish dump, too?

The entire length of the road from San Miguel to Eagles Nest is totally awash with rubbish that glitters in a disgusting ribbon in the autumn sunshine.

This rubbish hasn't been cleaned for years. It is about time San Miguel faced up to its responsibilities and sent the road cleaners out to remove this terrible eyesore.

Or is this another case where a town fails to make the environment acceptable for a largely non Spanish population? Yours disgustedly R. RADFORD, San Miguel de Salinas

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Friday, November 15, 2013

I BEGAN dreaming of White Christmases around about the same time Bing Crosby was singing about them.

COLD COMFORT IN SNOWMAN’S LAND

And for the first 20 years of my life, there was no business like snow business during the festive season.

December 25 would dawn with the ulti­ mate present from Santa on my doorstep ­ a thick carpet of snow having turned the landscape into a winter wonderland.

It was picture postcard stuff and it answered the prayers of just about every kid in the land.

Whether it was down to global warming, I don't know – but some­ time in or around the 70s, that tradi­ tional Christmas whitening stopped coming. Grey misery replaced the dazzle and the roll­the­snow­into­a­ big­ball­and­make­a­snowman rou­ tine was put on ice. Sometimes the entire winter came and went without a speck of the white stuff falling.

Now that I’m too old to enjoy it, the winter snow is back with a vengeance in England's green unpleasant land...but it seems to have forgotten when Christmas Day is because it now makes its deliver­ ies any time but the right time.

Santa's radar seems to have homed in on pinging down the white fact I won't be sliding around on my stuff between mid­November and backside on my upcoming visit to the end of February...but not the Manchester.

It’s nice to know there’s little back­end of December.

That should have a creaking geri­ chance of spending Christmas in a atric like me jumping for joy at the Lancashire hospital with half the

bones in my body broken ­ and pulled muscles where my cockles would normally be.

It’s equally exciting to know that my daughters and their offspring have enough umbrellas to keep the

The courage of a dying superstar I HAD no intention of men­ tioning rugby in my column this week ­ or indeed sport of any nature.

Well, would anyone want to brag about losing to the braggarts of South Africa for the umpteenth time in umpteen and one matches over the last 100­plus years?

It was the news I learned in the wake of Wales’s defeat that hurt most ­ news that prompted a tearful evening coloured by the image of a recent legend of sport revealing that he has only weeks to live.

Little more than a decade ago, Joost van der Westphalian was arguably the best rugby union player in the world. Regarded uni­ versally as on of the finest scrum halves in the history of the game, he starred in South Africa’s Mandela­ inspired World Cup victory in 1995 ­ and won a record 89 caps for his country.

But six years after retiring from the game, the 6ft 1in legend felt a weakness in his right arm...and a few months later was diagnosed with the beginnings of Motor Neurone Disease.

Now Joost was not exactly

a choirboy ­ and there are those among us who might suggest that he was being punished from above for his alleged sex and drugs demeanours off the field.

But after seeing him smile through such adversity and announce in a slurred voice that laughter is keeping him going, I cannot express my admiration for his courage.

Speaking with great diffi­ culty and a pale shadow of the 6ft 1in powerhouse of his playing days, he admitted he has only a 20 per cent chance of living to see the New Year. ‘’I realise every day could be my last,’’ he confessed.

“It's been a rollerskate from day one and I know I'm on a deathbed from now on. I've had my highs and I have had

my lows, but no more. I'm a firm believer that there's a bigger purpose in my life and I am very positive, very happy.’’

So am I, Joost. But you go on a special pedestal along­ side the great Bob Monkhouse, whose great courage on the Parkinson Show weeks before his death culminated in a joke about his terminal cancer.

The sick Springbok con­ tinues to promote his J9 charity for Motor Neurone Disease, with smiles and laughter his driving force.

As for the rest of us with our aches and pains, we can all take a leaf out of his book by putting on a happy face.

A grin and tonic please, barman. Joost to remember the good old days...

rain at bay as I wade through the puddles to join the Christmas shop­ ping queues.

As you might have gathered, the mere thought of swopping the Spanish sunshine for a Mancunian mega­bout of over­eating has given me a severe dose of Zimmertime Blues.

Admittedly, I desperately want to see my daughters and grandkids. I just wish I didn’t have to endure the cold, the wet, the traffic jams and the general depression of the UK. All I'm asking is a little favour from Santa. Please, Mr Claus, will you ask Rudolf if he can arrange to sleigh my kids and grandkids over to spend Christmas Day with me on the beach in Guardamar.

Oh, and tell him Donna misses Blitzen and that he would like the Costa Blanca because it hasn't reind eer for a long time (new con­ tender for worst pun of 2013).

DONNA’S UK TOP TEN FOR CHRISTMAS 1.

Freezedom Come, Freezedom Go ­ The MisFortunes 2. Coldfinger ­ Shirley Brassy 3. For Your Ice Only ­ Sheena Leastsun 4. Damp Busters March ­ Eric Overcoates 5. It’s All In The Grime ­ Cliff Richard 6.Sunny Side of the Sleet ­ Duke Wellington 7. Long to Rain Over Us ­ Queen 8. Swimwear over the Rainbow ­ Beach Boys 9. The Midnight Shower ­ No­sun Pickett 10. Land of Cold ­ Freda Pain

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

NOTHING ON THE TELLY

I WAS sitting in the living room, gazing into the mid­ dle distance when a pat­ tern of wavy lines appeared before my eyes.

It could mean only one thing ­­ the start of a flash­ back.

But which stop along Memory Lane was to be my destination? Was I about to revisit my first day at primary school? My first job? My first date? My first marriage?

'Oy, you!' Mrs S shouted from the kitchen. 'What's with this FIRST marriage non­ sense? You've only ever been wed to me.'

'Sorry, luv,' I called back. 'I got a bit carried away. It's just that I'm about to have a flash­ back and I'm not sure where it will be taking me.'

'Sometimes, I wish you would be carted off some­ where!' responded Mrs S. 'Now stop annoying me, I'm cooking some rhubarb. I know you hate rhubarb and that's why I'm cooking it.'

I returned to my reverie but it was no good. Although the pattern of wavy lines was still there, my flashback hadn't

materialised.

Mrs S called out again.

'And why the heck are you sitting there gazing at the telly? You'll see nothing but a pattern of wavy lines until the repair man comes tomorrow.'

Blast it! That meant that if I wanted to recall stuff from my past, I would have to do it all by myself without the aid of a flashback.

The trouble was my memory was now getting like a . . . er . . . you

know, one of those kitchen tool thingies that has lots of small holes in it and is used to separate smaller particles from larger ones or solids from liquids.

I squeezed my eyes shut and tried hard to concen­ trate. But it was no good.

Memory Lane had closed for the night.

I would have to retire to the pub.

But that was out of the ques­ tion. Dave the barman had gone to a funeral or a wed­ ding or a christening or something and had taken the keys with him.

Okay, I'd stay in and watch a bit of telly. But that was no good either because the flaming thing was broken. A pity.

I hadn't viewed Coronation Street in ages and it would have been nice to see if Ena Sharples was feeling any better. And a shame it wasn't Boxing Day because The Great Escape would have been on.

But my programme choices were

seriously limited. Let's face it, they were pretty much nil. I glared at the busted TV set in the corner.

'And that's not the only useless object currently in my living room!' Mrs S yelled from the kitchen.

'Dammit, woman, you've done it again!' I called back.

'How the heck can you know what I'm thinking?'

'Familiarity,' she replied.

'We've been married long enough for me to read your mind even if I am only your FIRST wife. Anyway, why don't you get off the sofa and do something you're good at, like going to the pub?'

'Can't,' I sulked. 'Dave the barman's gone

to a bar mitzvah.'

I glared at the telly once more. It was still showing only wavy lines. Then I had a sudden awful realisation. If the TV repair man failed to show tomorrow, I would have to act out episodes of Peppa Pig, Thomas the (flaming) Tank Engine and Mickey Mouse and his stupid dog Plato for my visiting grand­ children.

'That's Pluto not Plato,' Mrs S corrected my thought from the kitchen. 'And never mind the grandkids at the moment. The rhubarb should be ready soon. Have you seen the cullendar any­ where?'

I shook my head in disbe­ lief. 'Cullendar? Even I know that it doesn't take days, weeks, months or even a whole year to cook rhubarb.'

'I said cullendar, you idiot!' responded Mrs S. 'It's a big version of a sieve ­­ which exactly describes your mem­ ory these days.'

'Thanks, luv,' I said. 'Sieve was the very word I was searching for earlier on. Or was that yesterday?'

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

I’M SICKEN BY DEPRAVED DOG ABUSERS I’ve written my article, having just got back would like to know is that why in 1969 was this from a mountain walk with my eight dogs which law scrapped in Germany?

There are even 'erotic zoos' where people can I am so honoured to work with and to have.

I need them around me, always, as I am in peace when I’m in their company. For those who know me, you will know that I am constantly reminding people that dogs are our teachers and they are the more intelligent species.

Dogs do not scheme plans on how they can inflict pain and mental abuse on humans.

Sadly, some humans do inflict all kinds of abuse onto dogs on a daily basis. So with this being the case, how can we possible call ourselves the more advanced and intelligent species?

While working in London last week, I spoke with my wife, Jean, on the phone one day, and she was very distressed.

Someone had posted a photo on Facebook of a man raping a dog.

Why would a human being do such a depraved act on an innocent animal? There are many sick and warped people out there ­ can we say the same for dogs? No, is the answer.

I was disgusted to find out that there are now animal broth­ els in Germany, Denmark and Norway, plus many more around the world, that are not made public. In Germany, the law states that animal pornography is illegal, but sex with ani­ mals is perfectly legal! Now how on earth do laws like this get passed? Shocking would be an understatement. German authorities say that they are looking to reinstate an old law that would make it illegal to have sex with animals. What I

go and have sex with most animals, from llamas to goats! Laws in Denmark and Norway state that it is perfectly legal to have sex with an animal, providing the animal has not suffered!

On one internet page there were some people debating whether or not this revolting activity was acceptable or not. I was stunned when someone wrote that they thought there was no problem with this at all. He also said that it was a well­ known fact that animals do not have feelings.

Well I can assure anyone wanting to know that animals do have feelings and whoever came up with that assumption in the first place needs to keep their mouth shut when it comes to animals, because they clearly know nothing. So please believe me when I say that dogs and other ani­ mals are more intelligent than us humans. There is no other species on this planet that has such a high per­ centage of "Sick" individuals in its population as us humans.

I am available for consultations throughout the Costa Blanca region, if you are having problems with your furry best friend. To book a consultation you can email me at peter@thedogyouneed.com and I will contact you straight away. We can also look after your dogs and cats when you are away. Please email me or call me on 664­709­758 or 966­847­827 for more details.

They would never abuse us We have also set up an animal charity, where we help the most severely abused and injured animals in Spain. If you would be kind enough to donate anything to this special cause you can do by PayPal, where the account details are peter@thedogyouneed.com or to our Nat West charity account, where the sort code is 60­16­03 and the account number is 73754900. Even one Euro will help, so please, please, try and support us. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT? Ximo is a beautiful galgo x podenco and is approx 18 months old. He is a delight­ ful easy to please dog and good with other dogs, and cats too! Ximo will be a very loyal and loving companion.

Call: 645 469 253 www.pet­ sinspain.com

Ximo EDDIE came into the ken­ nels in May of this year after being found running around in the middle of the countryside. He is a 1 year old medium crossbreed who loves cuddles and going for a walk; Eddie he will be a very loyal companio and is also fully vaccinated, micro chipped and castrated. For more info call 966 710 047.

Gracie is a pretty black and white girl born late March 2012 and hand reared.

She has been spayed and is friendly and loving. To meet Gracie please phone Joe (The Cat Man) on 966719272.

Carrie born approx Jan 2013 is a beautiful mixed breed dog that was found wande­ ring with her two sisters, she will be a medium to large girl, she has such a lovely tempe­ rament, she is very good with other dogs and is very loving and of course very willing to please. For more info 650 304 746.

Or email p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail .com

Sonny is a very sweet little dog, 4 years old. He is chip­ ped and neutered and good with other dogs. He is quiet in the house, in fact the per­ fect small dog companion.

Call: 645 469 253 www.pet­ sinspain.com

Missy is about 2 years old , very talkative and loves head butting your hand when she wants attention.

As you can see she is a beautiful tabby girl with the most gorgeous markings and would make someone a very loyal companion. Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Twinkle She is about 6 months old and a lovely tabby and white girl with big yellow eyes. She again is very playful and cuddly and would make someone a wonderful companion.

Please contact K9 or PHONE 600 84 54 20 for more info www.k9club.es

Linda is approx 7 years old her owner has died, she has nowhere to go which is very sad as she has a very sweet nature and loves people.

Please can you give her a new chance in life? To find out more about Linda please ring the PEPA helpline on 650 304 746 or Email: p.e.p.a.animalcharity@gmail .com

Carrie

Sonny

Missy

Twinkle

Linda

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

A MOTHER’S LOVE

I was chatting the other day to my eldest daughter on the internet and the conversation turned to what I was going write about this week. Sometimes ideas come to me or like last week, a

can bring a friend with her in the summer, as she´ll be nearly 16 by then and so will want time out with her mate which I´m only too happy to let her have, as long as she is enjoying the summer with me, I don´t mind a friend coming along too.

theme leaps out at me and might even be too important not to write about, but just occasionally I lack that little bit of inspiration. I use a variety of ways to find worthwhile things to write about; after all my life in Spain is only interesting to oth­ ers if something fun or different is happening. As I was talking to my girl, she mentioned that I could write about her life in the UK, and the rela­ tionship that we have.

She’s just begun working on her GCSE´s and is finding them quite tough, even asking me on occasions for my help, which I’m only too pleased to give. I have offered to help her with English, which seems only natural, but also with maths as I managed to pass my O level (yes I am that old!) and I didn´t find that subject to be too scary. I have advised her to forget asking anything about sci­ ence or the foreign language she has chosen, German! I did try many times to sway her towards Spanish but as she´d started German, she wanted to continue so she made up her mind and so that part of her curriculum is up to her!

However in the few subjects that I can help her, I am more than willing, albeit via Facebook or Skype. I would love my girls to come and live with me, as I never tire of telling them, but I am also painfully aware of how settled they are in their home and school and how they do not now want the major upheaval of a move to a new country. They´re happy, so they tell me, and as a mum it´s all I ever want for them. I have told my daughter that she

I am here for my son. I wipe his tears when he´s hurt or sad, or I pick him up when he falls. I help him with his writing and I teach him English. I tuck him into bed at night with a special story and kiss him and hug him whenever I get the chance. I am well aware that although I had time with my girls when they were young, I

have also missed a lot of their childhood, which is time that I will never get back. Although I visited when I could, there were things that my girls could not understand and I´m not even sure now that they do. But, I am so grateful to have them in my lives; to be able to be a part of their lives and I think I bore them with how many times I tell them I am here for them. If I can help, just a small bit with some advice then I am so happy to do so, whether they listen or dismiss what I say is their choice and I know I have two very independent young ladies who just want what we all want: ­ that’s a bit of sup­ port and a lot of love and I want my girls to know I love them to the moon, all around the stars and back again. This was what we used to say to each other when we lived together and noth­ ing has changed how I feel and nothing ever will.

I am lucky in a way that I have this forum to express my views, so that I can say what I think and share my feelings with you, but we all have the ability to tell those we love just how much they mean to us, it doesn´t have to be via the pages of a top local newspaper. It can be via a plain sheet torn out of a notebook or writing book, or even on an E­mail. Take time this week to let those who mean the world to you understand how very special they are.

I am truly honoured to have the children that I am proud to call my daughters and son, and I want them all to know that I am here for them come what may. A mother´s love should be the most precious, undemanding love there is, I know my children have it from me, although I lack the same. Maybe that´s what makes me appreciate my kids even more.

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Friday, November 15, 2013

THE SHAMBLES OF NOU POLITICIANS and broad­ casting don’t mix. It doesn’t matter where in the world you are, the same mantra applies, and here in Spain we have a classic shambles in the Valencia region over the doomed Nou TV channels and radio station.

As a broadcaster and jour­ nalist I always feel strong in solidarity when cuts to servic­ es happen and freedoms are challenged. Back in 1985, I went on my first BBC strike when the Governors incor­ rectly blocked transmission of a documentary, which fea­ tured the then IRA leader, Martin McGuinness. The pro­ gramme was pulled when the excellent Director General, Alistair Milne, was on holiday and the decision was directly orchestrated by the Home Secretary, Leon Brittan, who almost certainly took the lead from Margaret Thatcher. We downed tools for 24 hours in support of Milne, who then ordered the programme to be televised (and a pretty unin­

teresting show it was!). RTTV. Since Canal Nou first Thatcher took her revenge started back in 1989, the by putting in a new puppet, in whole organisation has been the form of Duke Hussey, to an ego trip for the Valencian become the new Governor’s politicians who just threw chairman, and he in turn money at it left, right, and sacked Milne in 1987. I, to centre. These are the same this very day, say that things idiots who squandered zil­ went downward for the BBC lions on magnificent build­ from that very moment. ings in Valencia City; a ghost Fast forward to today and airport at Castellon; and fool­ the situation in Valencia in ish and expensive enterpris­ regard to the overblown es like F1 in Valencia. By the

way, do you notice that Alicante Province is all a bit of a fag end in this? RTTV seemed also to dance to the tune of the Partido Popular, and with cash being no object, they bid nonsensical money for big sports events, which were shown else­ where, and created two addi­ tional channels, including a 24­hour news service that opened 5 years ago.

Contrast this to other regions like Murcia who just have one public channel in the form of Channel 7(which has also struggled financially), but turn out some excellent news and local programming on a shoestring. The Valencian Government allowed gross over manning on the Nou channels which my ex UK broadcasting col­ leagues would have killed for, and so the party had to end, somewhat belatedly, with a thousand job losses earlier this year. Since that was overturned by a court last week, the Valencian President, Alberto Fabra, said that they could not afford to keep the services going and that they were going to close. I don’t necessarily dis­ agree with his decision, but where was the due diligence and monitoring from Fabra and his predecessor Camps over this expensive ego trip?

Why didn’t alarm bells sound a few years ago?

What is highly dangerous though is a key part of the

Fabra case. He says that public broadcasting is not a priority compared to keeping hospitals and schools open.

When politicians say some­ thing like that, they are embarrassed by what they may not have done in the past and also are in effect launching an attack on media freedom. He’s already paid an initial price by having the sacked broadcasters keeping a service running and staging some lively polit­ ical debates critical of him, which have played to record viewing figures. The irony of this is that though the Valencian politicians are mainly at fault, why have not the RTTV journalists been more robust in being critical and more balanced in cover­ ing the PP administration in recent years? We hear sto­ ries of threats, but perhaps the generous wages were the main factor rather than principled journalism? That’s why I’m not as sad over the demise of RTTV as I really ought to be.

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Tony

Mayes

HE ALWAYS HAS SOMETHING TO SHOUT ABOUT

GREAT NIGHT, SHAME ABOUT THE HEAT

THIS week I'm breaking with tradition and am not start­ ing with a criticism, as I want to give some well­deserved praise, which goes to the scores of talented people who took part in the Royal British Legion (Torrevieja Branch) Remembrance poppy concert at the Municipal Theatre.

It never ceases to amaze me how much talent there is among the expat community and I'm so pleased it was sup­ ported with a capacity audience. The Cantamos children's choir, the Footworks Dance Academy, Orihuela Costa Male Voice Choir, the Torrevieja Pipes and Drums and the Velvetones all joined forces to give this concert, progressing through a range of well­known and much­loved songs, from the musicals to all­time favourites. Talented solo singers Janelle Gaskell and Rebecca Holt were superb, singing songs from A Chorus Line, Les Miserables, Cats and Oliver.

Most moving was the Footworks Dance Acanemy, combining dance and gymnastics to form three aircraft recreating wartime heroism to great war movie themes including the Dambusters. It doesn't take much to stir patriotism in me and this evening certainly hit all the spots.

Now for the criticism. The theatre was packed and that cre­ ates heat, so where on earth was the air conditioning? The heat in the auditorium was ridiculously high ­ it's such a shame that people have to sit and be so uncomfortable in this, a modern building, which should be able to cope with all conditions. More importantly, I believe that this theatre is a death trap and would never have been allowed to have been built in the UK. We were sitting in the "gods" in the back row and it took almost 15 minutes at the end from there to the entrance. There are no exits at the rear of the auditorium and if there were a fire and panic, people would be overcome by smoke, burned or crushed. To have only two exits from the auditorium near the front and none at the back is a death trap.

A story which infuriated me but came as no surprise was that only 1.5% of reports alleging a person was an ille­ gal immigrant has resulted in anybody being removed from the UK. It makes a farce of a new system inviting people who suspect someone of being illegal to report them. While it has been shown that many immigrants coming to Britain have gone on to be beneficial to their new country, there are many thousands who are an absolute curse. We know many have hidden themselves in trucks crossing the Channel, risked life and limb to get in, and once in have joined the black econo­ my, living on the fringe of society, organising criminal gangs, committing a wave of offences and filling the jails. Some have ended up being indoctrinated into extremism, becoming a real threat to the country's security. Parliament's Home Affairs Committee have expressed real concern at the appalling removal rate and heard there was a backlog of 432,029 immigration and asylum cases in March this year.

The committee's report revealed that between its introduction on September 30th 2013 and June 30th of this year, the data­ base had received 48,660 allegations ­ about 178 a day.

The committee's chairman, Labour MP Keith Vaz, urged the Coalition government to take "effective action" to amend the "poor record". Fair enough ­ until you remember it was Labour which had a virtual open door of unrestricted immi­ gration into Britain because they were hell­bent on creating a multi­cultural society. And, for a start, failed asylum seekers and those who commit offences within 10 years of arrival should be automatically sent back to their country of origin, without exception. And that means not giving bail to offend­ ers, just be tough and ship them out. The word would quickly get round that Britain is no longer a soft touch.

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Britain is one of the safest countries in the world to have a baby, thanks to the NHS. So why the hell is the NHS having to spend nearly £700 on clinical negligence cover for every live birth in England?

The National Audit Office has revealed that last year this cover cost nearly £500million ­ almost a fifth of the money spent on maternity within the NHS! I cannot agree more with the Office chairman, Margaret Hodge, who says this is "absolutely scandalous". It's yet another example of the damnable litigation culture which has swept Britain, thanks to America, where so much that's destructive in society comes from. Of course things go wrong in every walk of life, but not everything that goes wrong is someone's fault, although every lawyer would like you to think so for their own financial benefit. Yes, mistakes do happen in the NHS, but not every still birth or abnormal birth is someone's fault. It really is about time that people stopped trying to make money out of anything and everything which goes wrong in life. And if Miliband and co really want to help the financial problems of the "ordinary working man" how about him focussing on the fees charged by the legal profession, espe­ cially those involved in the litigation culture? And how about estate agents, funeral directors, accountants, architects and, oh yes, how about looking at the fees charged by MPs in their second and third jobs? Hypocrites one and all!

How many more times are we going to hear of a baby or small child ripped to pieces by a dog before some­ thing sensible is done to prevent dimbo parents and relatives from having killers around children. I refer to the tragedy of the death of four­year­old Lexi, from Leicester, mauled to death by a French bull mastiff, brought into the home a few weeks before from a dog rescue centre. The new home was in a block of flats (what a place to keep a big dog!). It was reported the frantic mother had to repeatedly stab the fren­

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zied dog several times to try to get the animal to release her daughter.

Just look at the picture of this dog. I wouldn't go anywhere near it and I certainly wouldn't want any child of mine to do so either. And why on earth anyone else would want to have such a beast in their home I just cannot comprehend either.

To introduce a large dog of any description into a home where there is a baby or young child is not only irresponsi­ ble, it is criminal. We feel far too sorry for the stupid parents who suffer a loss like this. Yes, it's sad, of course it is, but action needs to be taken to stop the idiots bringing killers into their homes. A new law is to be introduced to make it a crim­ inal offence to own a dog which injures or kills, with owners facing a jail term of up to 15 years. I sincerely hope that judges impose maximum sentences even to those parents who have suffered the loss of a child. Because, by doing that, it might get it through the brains of the stupid that it is just plain crazy, and to set an example to others. What I find so crazy and annoying are the so called animal lovers who think that anything that a dog does wrong is the fault of the owners. That is total rubbish. Dogs have, deep down in their make up, a killer instinct, just as humans have. It was there for survival, and any dog, given the right circumstances, will turn killer, just like many people will, even though dogs are supposed to be "domesticated" and humans are supposed to be "civilised". And the most placid dog can, for no appar­ ent reason, go on the attack. And I can speak with some authority here because my wife once brought an American pit bull into her home (before it was a banned breed) and thought it was a "big softie". She learned to her cost that it wasn't, when it turned on her teenage daughter for no appar­ ent reason. Luckily she only had an injured arm, but it could have been far worse. The dog had to be put down ­ the police came and shot it, 25 years ago.

Unfortunately there's big money at stake in the animal "industry" and adverts show dogs in the best light. As Christmas approaches there will be many more people think­ ing of having a pet, suckered in with all the emotional twad­ dle. My advice would be don't. We have a very small Westie ­ but even she has snarled at our grandchildren, and we will never trust her around any small child any more.

The obvious problem is that you can never be sure your new pride and joy will not take a look at a young child playing nearby, or another dog and think it's a toy or an easy meal.

But more than that, do you really want the problems an ani­ mal causes ­ having to change your lifestyle to always con­ sider the pet, the cost of food, vet bills, kennelling, etc.

Question: Do you really want to have the chore of cleaning your home every day after your pet, and cleaning the dog's filth from the pavements? Do you really want to have to con­ sider the type of holiday you have because you have a pet?

Sadly there many people in this world who think more of their animals than they do of human beings.

Come hell or very high water TWO of Spain's largest rivers have the highest levels of cocaine, speed, ecstasy, cannabis and tranquillisers in Europe in their waters, according to toxicologists and environmental scien­ tists. The river Manzanares, which runs through Madrid, and the Jarama, are both outlets for purified sewage, mean­ ing drugs which the body does not break down and destroy and which come out in a person's urine are pres­ ent in high doses in the rivers.

Samples taken on February 19 and March 15 last year at various points of the rivers show that the most promi­ nent drug found in the water is cocaine which, after cannabis, is the second­ most highly­consumed illegal sub­ stance. Traces of LSD and heroin were not found in the waters, but pure

MDMA – the core ingredient in ecstasy – was highly prevalent in the river Jarama at the point where the treated waste water from Valdebebas in Madrid entered it.

Opiates, metamphetamines and EDDP were found at the highest levels in Europe, but were partly thought to be due to the fact that various tranquillis­

ers sold on prescription in Spain con­ tained variations of these. Cannabis concentrations of up to 43 per cent were found in both rivers in February last year and 57 per cent in March – nowhere near as high as cocaine or amphetamines, even though it is thought to be the most regularly­con­ sumed drug in Spain due to climatic conditions being ideal for growing mar­ ijuana plants.

Tranquillisers such as Lorazepam and other Benzodiazepines and barbi­ turates, said to be prescribed to up to 11.4 per cent of Spain's population, are highly present in both rivers.

Consumption of both in Spain is higher than anywhere else in Europe, even though they can only be obtained via medical prescription.

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH Spanish 97

from the verb haber and is used to express existence NOT action: Había leche en el frigorífico, no había dinero en el We are still looking at the imperfect tense this week as there is a lot to learn and remember, keep the conjugations banco, había mucha gente en las tiendas When you are going to do something in Spanish you use close by as you are reading these lessons so you can conju­ the formula ir + a + infinitive e.g: voy a comprar una casa, gate properly as we go through.

Here are the answers to last weeks translations, how did it is a mental rather than physical action and so is therefore you get on? Did you get the correct tenses?

I knew the answer – yo sabía la respuesta, were you thinking about me – pensabas en mi?, I always studied before a test – siempre estudiaba antes de un examen, sometimes he didn´t earn as much money as his wife – a veces él no ganaba tanto dinero como su esposa, I spoke with Jorge this morning – hablé con Jorge esta mañana, I bought this shirt in El Corte Inglés – compré esta camisa en El Corte Inglés, Maria always studied in the kitchen – Maria siempre estudiaba en la cocina, It was quarter past three when I found the money – Era las tres y cuarto cuando encontré el dinero, I learned how to ride a bike when I was four years old – aprendí a montar en bicicleta cuando tenía cuatro años, All my life I wanted to have a piano – toda mi vida quería tener un piano, They couldn´t vote because they didn´t have identification­ no podían votar porque no tenían in the imperfect, so to say I was going to, you were going to, etc we use iba, iibas, iba etc. identificación Yo iba a comprar una casa, Él iba a cantar, Ellos iban Back in week fifteen we learnt ´hay´ can you remember a tocar las guitarras.

That finishes the explanations of when to use the imperfect what it means? I hope you can, it means ´there is, there are, is there? and are there?´ the imperfect versión of hay is tense in Spanish, I hope you are familiar with the conjuga­ había which of course means ´there was or there were´ It is tions of not only this but also of the preterite and the different

times they are used.

Now I am going to give you some revision of both tenses, there will be the usual clues as to which tense to use, take your time and try and use these tenses whenever possible, ge tinto the habit of using the correct tense when talking and remember your pronunciation: I used to work in a supermarket, Dumbo could fly because he had big ears, yesterday I read a book, what did you do yesterday?, usually my class would end at midday, The King was fifty years old, Generally the train arrived late in the morning, I always thought about you, yesterday I thought about my family in England, last month I went to the cine­ ma and I saw a fantastic film, It was a beautiful day and suddenly it started to rain, when I was young I often read sci­ ence fiction books, last weekend I went out with my friends, her husband was tall, I was going to go to the shop but you didn´t want anything, I used to have a dog, her brother fell out of the chair, yes­ terday I heard a rumour, we walked yes­ terday, today we want to go by bus, I didn´t do anything yesterday As ever, take your time with each les­ son, do it throughout the whole week, return to it when you get the chance and hopefully by now you are beginning to think in Spanish. You have been learning Spanish with me, assuming you started from lesson one for nearly one hundred weeks, there will always be more to learn but at the very least you should be able to be understood and getting some confidence when speaking Spanish.

Have a great week as ever.

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

A very female problem Post­menopausal vaginal dryness affects huge num­ bers of women and can cause untold misery and suffering but is barely dis­ cussed even between close friends. We find it easier to talk about death and cancer than we do about this private but often distressing female problem.

It is much more common than you might think and there are ways to treat it without necessarily going to your Spanish doctor. It’s dif­ ficult enough when we don’t have a good command of the vocabulary and we have a sore throat but a sore “down below” well! Most of us probably wouldn’t even know where to begin.

Vaginal dryness is caused when levels of the female hormone oestrogen begin to fall and this is usually around the time of menopause although in some cases it can be before and is usually then as a result of medical treatment for unrelated conditions. It

can be exacerbated by using feminine washes and deodorants and if you suffer from this problem it is best to use PH body wash in the bath so that the acid alkaline balance in the vagina is maintained or unperfumed soap.

In the past women have resorted to using KY Jelly before intercourse to offer some lubrication but usually this isn’t applied high enough in the vaginal canal and in many cases offers only a little lubrication apart from taking away any spon­ taneity in the bedroom.

Help is now at hand in the form of a product that can be

bought without prescription and offers real help to many sufferers. Replens is a vagi­ nal moisturiser delivering moisture for days after each treatment and puts back the choice in your life. When used it offers immediate relief from dryness and works on the vaginal walls to give long lasting hydration.

Replens is different from other vaginal moisturisers as it contains a bio adhesive which allows it to attach to dry, compacted cells and to deliver continuous moisture until these cells naturally regenerate themselves which occurs every 3 to 5 days. With Replens the vagi­

How to apply false eye lashes

nal tissues are regenerated and rejuvenated and it has been clinically tested and FDA approved.

Another little known aid to vaginal dryness is actually a food supplement known as Sea Buckthorn Oil or Omega 7 which maintains normal structure and func­ tion of the skin and mucous membranes such as those in the eyes, nose mouth and female reproductive tract.

We are going to be mak­ ing an order for these prod­ ucts soon as they are avail­ able over the internet but we have decided that this is tire­ some and difficult to have delivered over in Spain and we want to be able to offer women a discreet way of obtaining them which gives back control and confi­ dence.

If you are interested in obtaining them from our­ selves please contact us full confidentiality is always maintained.

Nothing says diva quite like a pair of caterpillars on your eyes. Learn to dazzle them all with flawless false lashes.

Whether or not you have long lashes, you can apply false lashes to your natural lash for a more dramatic look. False lashes get you noticed and nobody can resist a pair of blink­ ing beauties, so if you want to go all out when you hit the town next time, here’s how: First and foremost, it is important to learn how to correctly apply false lashes. At first, getting them on may seem a bit tricky, but with enough practice and this helpful guide, you will be a blinking babe in no time.

The best false lashes to use are the individual lashes.

These are simply applied to your natural lash, giving it a bit of subtle volume. Applying these lashes to the outer corners of your eyes will also help brighten up and open up your eyes.

When you apply the lash, take a toothpick to apply a small drop of glue to the false lash. Then, using your one hand, gently pull the one corner of your eye, straightening it out, while you apply the lash with your free hand. Press it down Email simply18es@hot­ firmly and hold for a few seconds. Once you have completed mail.com or call Lynda on the one eye, move on to the next.

Never, ever apply the glue directly to your eyelid, as this 667 817 546 will cause a messy, clumpy effect.

ARE YOU GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP?

DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to contact@medb.es

In general, a third of any population do not get enough sleep, and women are far more affected than men. When we don’t get quality sleep, we feel exhausted during the day, and are unable to concen­ trate on the task ahead.

And these are only the ini­ tial problems from lack of sleep. Over time however, the entire body starts to break down because sleep is necessary to repair and regenerate continually damaged tissues and organs. During the night, the pineal gland secretes the hormone melatonin which in turn stimulates the production of vitally impor­ tant Growth hormones.

These growth hormones and growth factors are responsible for repairing damaged tissue especially muscle, but also other active organs such as the brain and the kidneys.

Interestingly, these hor­ mones are at their highest levels between the hours of 10pm and 2 am. Melatonin

is also the base material for producing serotonin, the ‘feel good hormone’. The recommendation is to sleep 8 hours a day, however many people feel great with just 6 hours sleep a day.

Furthermore, as we grow older we tend to need less sleep. What is important is not the number of hours you sleep, but the quality of sleep you are getting.

Sleeping for 4 straight hours may be more benefi­ cial to the body than 12 hours of broken sleep.

There are basically 2 stages of sleep – REM (Rapid Eye Movement) and Non­REM (Non Rapid Eye Movement). REM sleep is deep and regenerative,

while in NREM we are anx­ ious and easily awoken.

The right surrounding is vital to ensure good quality sleep. Darkness is needed for good sleep, so make sure lights are turned off in your bedroom. Use a cur­ tain if necessary. Keep your mobile phones and deck phones away from your bedroom. Many peo­ ple are sensitive to electro­ magnetic waves and unaware. Lastly, empty your mind and relax your body. Mental Chatter is a big cause of insomnia.

FOR FULL BODY DIAG­ NOSTIC SCAN CALL DR MANNU: 965071745

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

MICROBES HAVE A LOT TO ANSWER FOR Q

I’ve had chest pain in the past several months, and I also suffer from breathlessness, especially when I walk up­hill. I have received several courses of antibi­ otics from my doctor, and these have helped for a while, but my symptoms keeps returning. I’ve been told it’s a chest infection, but I have also noticed an irregularity with my heart beat. Please let me know your opinion.

A

The problem you describe can be caused by a number of factors; however, based on my experience with diag­ nostic scans, they are most likely due to problems related to your lungs or heart or both organs. The problem is normally caused by a microbe that is described as ‘opportunistic’ because it takes advantage of a weakened or dysfunctional immune system to invade the body. These micro­organisms include E. coli, Streptococcus, Staphylococcus, enterococ­ cus, candida, etc., and they are found all around us, in the food we eat, the air we breathe, even on the surface of the skin. However they cannot gain entry into the body until our immunity becomes compromised. Our usual defence against such bugs is our immune system which includes white blood cells that directly fight such bugs by engulfing them, and antibodies which are like chemicals specifically designed to neutralize deadly bugs. When our immune defences are weakened, these deadly bugs get a chance to invade our tissues and organs. But the extent of colonization by opportunistic microbes depends on the strength of one’s immunity. From my experience with full body scans, most people have a lowered immunity due to low grade inflamma­ tion of their immune organs like the thymus gland. Normally such people are able to carry on without any health issues until something tips them over. This could be some problem from inside the body, or some external factor such as stress, exposure to cold or even medications. Opportunistic

microbes usually enter the body through the mouth and then spread through the gastro­intestinal tract – the stomach, duodenum, large intestine, gall bladder and liver. The respi­ ratory tract is another entry point for these microbes. From here microbes such as candida can invade the pleura­ lung covering – and cause breathlessness. From the lungs, microbes can spread to other parts of the body, especially to organs in close proximity to it such as the heart. On a num­ ber of occasions, I have detected active staphylococcus aureus as well as streptococcus inside the chambers of the heart, but in medical literature this is a rare occurrence, only seen when people show symptoms of Rheumatic Heart Disease. Antibiotics worsen infections due to opportunistic microbes as they cannot tell them apart from white blood cells which your body needs to fight off harmful bugs. So after a course of antibiotics, your symptoms may ease off, but for a short while and then returns even much worse than before. In fact it is now known that after a course of antibi­ otics, the opportunistic microbes that recolonise the body put up a stronger resistance against the next course of antibi­ otics. To break this cycle I use a natural powerful antibiotic – Colostrum. Colostrum was widely used in the days before antibiotics were discovered. It contains antiviral, antibacteri­ al and antifungal agents, and is also rich in several kinds of antibodies and healing proteins. These antibodies offer the body additional protection against future infection while the healing proteins in the form of growth factors help heal and repair the damage done by deadly microbes. Colostrum also contains special proteins that stimulate the immune system.

Colostrum is available from MedB health Shop. Call 965071745

you recommend?

Q

PLEASE SEND YOUR QUESTIONS TO contact@medb.es or to the editor of the courier.

I suffer from recurrent urine infections, and have tried many antibiotics without success. What do

A

Many women who suffer from Urinary tract infections (UTIs) rely on antibiotics to treat them. UTIs are caused by a variety of micro­organisms ­ bacteria, but especially fungi such as Candida Albicans. These microbes originate from the intestines and find their way into other parts of the body. Urinary infections are more common in women than in men mainly because women have a much shorter urinary tract, making it easier for these organisms to travel into the urinary bladder. Most microbes that cause UTIs are described as opportunistic, because they wait until the immune system is compromised before invading the body.

Such microbes are usually all around us, in the air we breathe, the food we eat, and usually do not cause any prob­ lems since we are protected by a strong immune system.

When you take antibiotics, your immune system that was offering you protection against such opportunistic microbes becomes weakened. Antibiotics destroy both white blood cells and deadly microbes, and recent studies have demon­ strated that what’s left of the white blood cells becomes unable to fight deadly microbes. The most effective way to treat Urinary Tract Infection is with a natural product known as D­mannose. D­mannose is a simple sugar that is not digested by the body. Instead it passes undigested into the urinary bladder where it attaches to the bladder wall, making it difficult for microbes to cling on. By drinking a lot of water, these microbes are flushed out of your body. In summary D­ mannose eliminates microbes from your body without destroying them like antibiotics. It is more effective than most antibiotics. To find out more call MedB health Shop ­ 965071745 :

Tuna Nutrition Facts

Tuna, an excellent source of lean protein, vitamins and minerals, is a wonderful way to excite the palate while maintaining a bal­ anced diet. However, tuna has more to offer than just great taste and nutrition. Tuna can also help lower blood pressure and choles­ terol. Research has shown that omega­3 fatty acids, found in abundance in fatty fish like tuna, can help lower the risk of heart dis­ ease, ease the pain of arthritis, reduce asth­ ma complications, and is essential in the growth and development of young children.

Omega­3 fatty acids seem to have the ability to regulate and lower cholesterol lev­ els in the blood, as well as improving the ratio of good and bad cholesterol. It is this ratio between good and bad cholesterol that is thought to play a key role in heart attack risk.

According to research the omega­3 fatty acids found in seafood also improve brain function in middle­aged people and actually lower the risk of mental impairment as peo­ ple age. Tuna is therefore not only good for your heart but is affordable "brain food" for people of all ages.

The latest research comes from researchers at Utrecht and Maastricht Universities in the Netherlands and was pub­ lished in the journal Neurology. Tracking more than 1,600 Dutch men and women aged 45 to 70 over a six­year period, the researchers found those who ate fish regu­

larly scored higher on a battery of tests for memory, psychomotor speed, cognitive flex­ ibility, and overall cognition. Moreover, the study concluded that the specific factors contributing to better brain function were fatty fish and the consumption of two essen­ tial omega­3 fatty acids found in tuna, EPA (eicosapentaenoic acid) and DHA (docosa­ hexaenoic acid).

Protein is essential to building lean muscle mass and providing the body with energy.

Canned tuna is so high in protein that one six­ounce can yields one­third of the recom­ mended daily amount. Unlike many other high protein foods, however, tuna is naturally low in fat and calories. There are 116 calo­ ries in a 100­gram serving of water­packed canned tuna compared with 208 calories in the same serving of turkey.

As if this is not enough, one serving of canned tuna also contains 40 percent of the RDA for vitamin B12 and is a good source of niacin.

With Christmas approaching it’s a great time to celebrate the special people in your life so we are holding the Chloe Salon Awards. Tell us in no more than 50 words what makes that person so special to you! The categories are Best Mum, Best Dad, Best Daughter, Best Son and Best Friend. So tell us the category and the reason you wish to nominate them. Also don’t forget to put your name and the name of the person you’re nominating and your contact details as well as the nominated persons contact details. There is a special prize for each category, closing date is the 26/11. You can email us on chloesalon@aol.com or drop your nomination into any of our 3 salons.

Friday, November 15, 2013

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MURCIA PET BOOST A new pet charity has just been launched in the Murcia region, looking to promote responsible pet ownership and providing vet care for the sick and injured animals of people who just can’t afford to care for them. Cruz Azul will run along similar lines to the Blue Cross and the PDSA in the UK. Cruz Azul Vice President and Centre Manager, Sue Thomason, says: “As far as we are aware, there is no other charity in Spain that offers the same kind of service. Starting in the Murcia Region with the intention of expanding into other areas of Spain, we aim to promote responsible pet ownership and to assist those who need help to care for their pets.”

Cruz Azul is currently working with vets in the Los Alcázares, San Javier and Sucina areas and is raising funds to

enable the referral of sick or injured pets for treatment. They can only do this with public support and their initial priority will be major fundraising to start the process. When established, Cruz Azul also plans to run campaigns for sterilisa­ tion, vaccination and micro chipping to help reduce the stray animal problem in the region.

To help raise money for their work, Cruz Azul is opening a shop a week tomorrow (Saturday November 23rd) in San Javier, next door to Yorkshire Linen. The shop will be open Monday to Saturday, from 10.00am until 2.00pm, selling top quality clothing and accessories, furniture, household goods, books and bric­a­brac.

Cruz Azul will be delighted to hear from you if you have any items that you can donate, just phone Sue on 693 017 616 or E­mail shop@cruzazulmurcia.es.

HAVE A NICE DAY There is nothing like a MUCKING AROUND good musical One of the classic toe tapping musicals is coming to Torrevieja’s Teatro Municipal this Wednesday with the strains of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s, South Pacific. With classic songs like There is nothing like a Dame, Happy Talk, and Some Enchanted evening, an entertaining night is in store courtesy of Calpe’s Footlights Theatre Group. The event has been organised by the Torrevieja Costa Lions club with all the profits going to the Torrevieja homeless charity, Reach Out. Tickets can be bought online at www.ser­ vicam.es , just click on the logo for Teatro Municipal,Torrevieja and follow the instruc­ tions, or at the box office in front of Teatro Municipal, opening hours are 1100­1300 Tuesday to Friday plus for two hours imme­ diately before the performance, and are priced at 12 Euros.

By ANDREW ATKINSON AMERICAN teenager Erik Auer is living the dream life in the sun on the Costa Blanca, by mucking out stables and washing down pot­bellied and Iberian pigs! "It's great being here in Spain," said Erik, 19, who is a volunteer at the Grand Designs TV house, Casa La Pedrera. Erik, from Arlington, Virginia, is taking time out gaining work experience.

"I'm enjoying life at Casa La Pedrera, hav­ ing taken a year off College," said Erik, who attended Maritta College, Ohio. "I'm trying to see the World ­ before I hopefully get a job in engineering," said Erik. Casa La

Pedrera overlooks a lakeside reservoir, the Embalse de la Pedrer; a setting that became the dream location for South African born owners Jenni and Derek Ray. "Erik is so sweet ­ and is a great help. We have taught him things he didn't know," said Jenni.

"It is a busy period right now. I arrived in Spain in October after being in Florence, Italy, teaching English for a month, of which I gained a Certificate," added Erik. "I could­ n't resist not coming to Spain!" he added.

And he plans to continue his travels throughout Europe after his time over here: "I may go to Greece ­ or Sweden – next!”

KEITH’S SPECIAL DAY Last Sunday was a day to remember for Keith Carter, the chairman of the Orihuela Costa Branch of the Royal British Legion. Besides the annual moving occasion of the group’s Remembrance Day service, which took place at Mil Palmeras Church, Keith(pictured left) was officially recognised for his dedication to the organi­ sation. He’s been the Orihuela Costa branch chair­ man for the last 4 years, which has seen membership numbers triple, and he’s also the district’s Poppy Appeal co­ordinator.

Christopher Wyatt, chairman of the RBL’s District North in Spain pre­ sented Keith with a Certificate of Merit in recogni­ tion of all his work for the British Legion.

WICKED FAIRY READY

It’s panto time for the Campoverde Theatre Group, and they’ve gone for the most famous castaway of them all for their New Year show. The Adventures of Robinson Crusoe will be staged on three nights at San Miguel’s Casa de Culture between Friday February 7th and Sunday February 9th 2014, and tickets are already on sale at Bargain Books in San Miguel or by phoning Colin on 966 774 127. Man Friday of course will be part of the cast, but stand by for the appearance of the Wicked Fairy!

FAYRE DEAL There’ll be loads of Christmas bargains on offer at the La Siesta Ladies Friendship Group’s Christmas Fayre at the end of the month. The event is being staged at La Siesta Church in Torrevieja on Saturday November 30th, starting at 10.30am, with all proceeds going to local charities.

Cards with a difference Do you fancy having some fun and saving some money? If you live in the La Marina area, then you can learn how to make you own Christmas Cards in a special workshop this Wednesday (November 20th). The all­ day session is at the Social Centre on the

Urb.Marina and runs between 10.00am and 3.30pm. All the card making materials and refreshments will be provided, but you do need to bring your own packed lunch! For more details, phone Nadine on 966 795 020

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Focus on

BENIMAR BENIJOFAR

Centro Veterinario – simply the pets!

CENTRO Veterinario’s team of highly skilled and thorough­ ly trained veterinary surgeons are devoted to the care of your pet. Based in the Centro Comercial Benimar since 2005, its wide array of services include ample opening hours, 24­hour urgencies service (please call +0034 699 519 165 first), home visit service, individualised follow­up of every pet, and the warmest and most professional attention.

Centro Veterinario also offers ultrasound scanning, X­rays, analytical control, surgery, hospital stay, specialised store, hairdressing, animal identification, etc. In addition, we can provide whatever your pet needs, from individualised pet food to complements, flea & tick control items and veterinary medicines. Come and visit us ­ your pet will be in good hands.

Get your kicks at route 66 Lisa and Rob, the owners of the very successful Card Place and Newsagents in Benimar and Punta Prima Commercial Centre, have been in business for 11 years and are always up for a new challenge. The new and proud owners of Route 66 Diner, (based in Benimar, just opposite The Card Place and Newsagents), re­opened its doors on 22 March 2013 with a busy evening of good food and celebration. Since then, they have never looked back and the restaurant has gone from strength to strength. The couple have totally revamped the restaurant and given the menu a complete overhaul offering amazing American burgers, steaks, ribs, hotdog sizzlers and many other dishes. There is something available to suit all tastes. What’s more if it’s not on the menu, top chef Philip and his commis chef can whip it up for you. People in the area who know Rob and Lisa know they put 112% into everything they do, so why not pop along and meet them and their team at Route 66 Diner in Benimar. Bookings advisable Tel: 966 715 825

Used is great for Cathy Cathy’s Curiosity Corner is situated just off the Main Street in Benijofar, turning at the side of the Citroen Garage.

Cathy´s own passion and love for unusual furniture inspired the opening of her store. There is a fantastic display of quality used furniture that includes beds, sofas, dressers, tables and small decorative items such as ornaments and pictures, with new items being added to her stock daily. Cathy´s Corner may well be the answer for the sale of your unwanted items as well as the purchase of your new ones. Throughout the store you will find many knick­knacks available for purchase with all the proceeds from these items going to help raise funds for the Elche Children’s Home. You can call Cathy on Tel: 622 899 906, or email ­ cathy2hotmail.es or join her on facebook at CathysCuriosityCorner, or why not simply pop into see her for a chat and a cuppa!

A labour of Love for prints charming IN the seven years Karen and Norman Love have been running The Post Room Benijófar they have transformed it from a simple mail­box rental space into a village­style post office which has become the heart of the community. And that includes its dedicated passport service, dealing directly with the British Embassy in Madrid. Norman is a Consulate­ approved photographer for UK & Dutch passports and also provides photos for NIE, driving licences, visas etc. Each stage of expansion has been driven by customer needs and the latest service is no exception. Found within The Post Room Benijófar, the Print Room Spain offers a wealth of print­ ing services from basic colour printing to: business cards, fly­ ers, leaflets, business information, brochures, menus and specialist printing processes such as car wraps and exhibition or branded merchandise. For further information visit www.printroomspain.com or email info@printroomspain.com To contact The Post Room Benijofar, call 966 712382

ANNA’S TIENDA HAS IT ALL Anna opened her shop on Benijofar back in April, and you will get a warm welcome if you visit the store where you will be delighted with the array of new & second hand furniture & fun accessories for your home or garden. With many unusual items in stock and also gift ideas for any occasion, Anna will help and advise you on the perfect purchase. There are also some decorations for Christmas to help make your home pretty for the festive season. Prices are very reasonable throughout the store and Anna offers a free delivery service on purchases over € 50. Take this advert with you to Anna's to get a 10% discount on your purchase!

Opening hours are Tuesday to Friday 10am – 2 pm, and then 3pm to 6pm, and Saturday from 10am to 2pm. You can visit our Facebook page “Anna's Tienda” to keep up to date with new items in store and other information.

Donations of all Toys in Good Condition will be Welcomed!

Friday, November 15, 2013

Focus on

BENIMAR BENIJOFAR

Feel at home with Casas Manuel

THE family­run Casas Manuel was started by Linda Rodriguez­Fitz­Henry and Manuel Rodriguez (English/Spanish) 11 years ago. The rest of the team include daughters Sophie and Charlotte Rodriguez Fitz­Henry and son­in­law, Damon Haymes.

Casas Manuel offer a range of services to help in the buy­ ing and selling of houses ­ including mortgage advice, arranging NIE numbers, help with arranging the transfer of monies from overseas, free valuation service and transla­ tions. The company currently collaborate with a continually growing network of European and Scandinavian professional estate agents in Norway, Sweden, France, Belgium, UK, Russia, Iceland, Holland, Czech Republic, Finland and Germany. Casas Manuel are a much liked and well­respect­ ed part of the local community and are sponsors of Benijófar Athletics Club and Los Bandidos Petanca Club.

The plan that helps you break free from pain Dr Hans Christian Madsen DC has been a chiropractor for more than 30 years, with over 21 years experience with lasers. He has developed techniques with his own patented pinpoint lasers to treat specific areas. New cell growth is encouraged which helps to heal and repair damaged tissues, tendons or muscles. His specialist laser therapies allow many patients to feel some improvement almost immediately after treatment. Over time, most of our patients are able to resume normal lives free of the restrictions they previously experienced.

Please see our website for more information or come in and see us ­Calle Federico Garcia Lorca, No. 90, 03178, Benijofar (opposite the Citroen Garage)

RAISE A GLASS TO MG BODEGAS

If you love quality wine, then MG Bodegas is the place for you.

Established for 6 years, there’s a comprehensive selection of Spanish specialities at the right price to suit your pocket, many of which are exclusive to MG in the area. They also have wines from around the world, plus spirits and beer, and they also stock authentic Musetti Italian coffee. MG can help you whether you are running a bar, restau­ rant, or hotel with a special trade service which covers from Guardamar in the north, down to Los Alcazeres in the south. MG Bodegas are proud to offer professional wine and coffee training to local restaurateurs, and they run an in­house coffee machine service, where you can either buy or rent the best top of the range machines around. When you visit the MG Bodegas store, you can be guaran­ teed personal service backed up by first­hand knowledge of wine. For the connoisseur, you can join the MG Bodegas Wine Club, which meets every month and gives you the chance to enjoy regular tast­ ings, as well as some exclusive discounts and offers. MG Bodegas are open Monday to Friday 10am – 7pm, and Saturday 10am – 2pm.

Tel: 966 714 960. Calle Ramon y Cajal 13, Benijofar 03178. info@magicagourmet.com www.magicagourmet.com Cheers!

A taste of Italy in Benijofar Enrico, owner of the new Sinfonia De Roma Restaurant in Benijofar opened his doors 1 year ago.

Enrico has been in the family restaurant business for many years and is very customer focussed. Live Entertainment is available every week­end, with music to make you dance until you drop. Bookings for private functions are welcome with prices negotiable for large parties of people.

The restaurant is very nicely furnished with an Italian theme that makes you feel like you are sitting in a restaurant in the streets of Rome. So for those of you who would like to enjoy a typical Italian style evening out in a relaxed friendly atmosphere, the new Sinfonia de Roma Italian Restaurant in Benijofar is well worth a visit. For reservations Tel: 966 111 453

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Friday, November 15, 2013

HOMEMADE SOUP PUMPKIN SOUP Ingredients

2tbsp olive oil 1 onion, chopped 1 garlic clove, crushed 700g (1lb 6oz) pumpkin flesh, roughly chopped (can use butternut squash instead) 2 sweet potatoes, peeled and roughly chopped 1.2 ltrs (2pts) water or vegetable stock 200ml (7fl oz) milk or soya light alternative to milk 4tbsp cream or soya alternative to cream For the 'broomsticks' 4 part­baked breadsticks 2tbsp olive oil

Method

1. Heat the olive oil in a large pan, add the onion and garlic and cook for a few minutes to soften.

2. Add the pumpkin and sweet potato and cook for a couple of mins, then add the water or stock. Season with salt and ground black pepper, cover and bring to the boil, then simmer for 25 mins until the pumpkin and sweet potato are really ten­ der.

3. Meanwhile, preheat the oven to 200°C/400°F/gas mark 6.

Cut the bread in half lengthways, then make several cuts one third of the way up the length to look like broom bristles.

Repeat with the other bread, put onto a large baking sheet and drizzle with olive oil. Bake for 5­8 mins until golden.

4. Stir the soya light into the soup, whiz everything together in blender or processor in batches until smooth. Return to the pan and gently warm through. Pour into bowls and finish with a swirl of soya alternative to cream.

MUSHROOM SOUP Ingredients 50g butter 2 shallots, finely chopped 2 garlic cloves, peeled and chopped 400g mushrooms, wiped and roughly chopped 600ml vegetable stock Salt and freshly ground black pepper 100ml double cream Freshly chopped pars­ ley and finely chopped mushroom, to garnish

Method

1. Heat the butter in a large pan and fry the shallots and garlic for 5 mins until soft­ ened but not brown. Add the mushrooms and fry gently for 5 mins, stirring occasion­ ally.

2. Pour in the stock and sea­ son with salt and freshly­ ground black pepper.

Simmer for 10 mins until the mushrooms are very tender.

3. Remove from the heat and leave to cool for 5 mins, then puree the soup with a stick blender or transfer to a food processor and process until smooth.

4. Stir the cream into the pureed soup and heat through gently for 2­3 mins.

Adjust the seasoning to taste and serve in warmed bowls garnished with pars­ ley and chopped mush­ room.

CHICKEN SOUP Ingredients

1 small/medium chicken 2.5 litres (5 pts) water 2 chicken stock cubes (optional, not for gluten­free version) or use extra chicken wings 1 large onion, peeled and quartered 3 carrots, thickly sliced 2 celery stalks with their leaves, cut into large chunks 1 medium leek, trimmed, reserve green part, chop the rest 6 fresh parsley stalks 2 sprigs fresh thyme 2 garlic cloves, chopped (optional)

Method

1. Cut the chicken into four portions (two breasts and two leg portions), removing any visible fat and cutting off the skin from the neck and the tail openings. Put all the pieces into a very large pan, along with the carcass (this will add extra flavour), then pour in the water and add a teaspoon of salt.

2. Bring to the boil, then immediately turn down the heat to simmer. Find a large spoon and skim off the scum and fat that rises to the surface. Make sure the water is just letting up small bubbles and keep removing the scum until the soup is clear. This will take about 5­10 mins and if you do not look after it at this stage, the soup could taste bitter and look cloudy.

3. Now add all the other ingredients, except the green part of the leek, turn up the heat slightly to bring it back to simmer and carry on removing any froth or scum.

When the soup is clear again, turn the heat down as low as possible, place the green part of the leek on top, and put the lid on the pot. Simmer for 2½ hrs, but remove the chicken breast portions after 1 hr (leave in the legs).

4. Lift out all the large solids from the pan, then carefully strain the broth using a large sieve. Press down all the veg­ etables to extract as much of their juices as you can, then discard them. There should be approximately two litres of broth.

5. If you want to remove the fat floating on the top, take three sheets of kitchen paper and lay them on the surface then remove and throw away. Taste the broth and add more salt and pepper if needed.

6. Shred the breast meat into small strips, add to the broth and re­heat. Add chopped parsley and serve the soup very hot.

Continued on page 28

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Friday, November 15, 2013

CARROT AND CORIANDER SOUP Ingredients 1tbsp vegetable oil 1 onion, chopped 450g carrots, washed and sliced 1 clove garlic, crushed 1tsp ground coriander 1.2 ltr vegetable stock 3tbsp chopped fresh coriander Squeeze of lemon juice Freshly grated nutmeg to taste Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Method

1. Sauté the onions, carrots and garlic in a large pan with the oil for 4 mins. Once they have softened, but not coloured, add the ground corinader and stir. Season with salt and black pepper.

2. Pour the vegetable stock into the pan and bring to the boil.

Cover the pan and allow to simmer until the carrots are ten­ der, this should take around 20 mins.

3. Stir through the fresh corinader, remove from the heat and blend the soup, adding the lemon juice, nutmeg and season­ ing to taste as you do. You can use a hand blender or a food processor to blend your soup.

4. The soup will have cooled whilst blending, so if you plan to eat it right away, gently reheat the soup, without boiling it, and serve. If you are saving it for later, allow to cool and place in a airtight container in the fridge or freezer.

TOMATO AND RED ONION SOUP Ingredients 4 large tomatoes, halved 1 medium onion, thinly sliced 1 clove garlic, crushed

1 spray low­fat cooking spray 600ml tomato juice 300ml fresh stock 1tbsp dried mixed herbs 1tsp basil, torn into pieces, plus extra, to gar­ nish 1 splash Tabasco pepper sauce 4 small pots very low­fat plain yogurt

with 700ml of water.

3. Bring to the boil and add the stock cube, rosemary, salt, curry paste and creamed coconut.

Simmer for 15 to 20 minutes or until the squash is tender.

4. Using a plunge blender straight into the saucepan, blend a part of the soup but not all of it to give varying texture. Serve on its own or with bread and butter.

1. Preheat the oven to gas mark 6, 200°C, fan oven 180°C. Put the tomatoes, onion and garlic into a roasting tin. Spray with low fat cooking spray and roast for 20­25 mins, turning once. Cool, then remove the tomato skins and chop the tomatoes.

2. Pour the tomato juice and stock into large saucepan and add the roasted vegetables, mixed herbs, basil and Tabasco.

Bring up to the boil, then reduce the heat and simmer, par­ tially covered, for 5­10 mins. Serve the soup, topping each portion with 1tbsp yogurt and a few basil leaves.

2 tbsp olive oil 225g chorizo, cut into 1.5cm pieces 1 onion, chopped 2 cloves garlic, crushed 1 hot red chilli & 1 green chilli deseeded and finely chopped 1kg potatoes, peeled and cut into 2.5cm pieces 50g red lentils 500ml hot vegetables stock 1 tablespoon paprika 1 tsp dried thyme Salt and freshly ground black pepper Chopped parsley to garnish

Method

SPICY BUTTERNUT SQUASH AND COCONUT SOUP Ingredients 1 medium onion 2 cloves of garlic 1 butternut squash approx 1.5kg ½ sachet of creamed coconut 1 tsp mild curry paste 1tsp dried rosemary 1 vegetable stock cube Pinch of salt and black pepper

Method

1. Finely chop the onion and garlic and fry in a saucepan until caramelised.

2. Peel and chop the butternut squash and add to the pan

SPANISH STYLE POTATO AND CHORIZO SOUP Ingredients

Method

1. Heat the oil over a medi­ um heat in a large saucepan or deep sauté pan. Add the chorizo and fry gently for about 2 minutes.

2. Reduce the heat and add the onion, garlic and chillis. Fry gently for about 10 minutes until the onion is softened.

3. Add the potatoes and lentils then pour in the stock.

Stir in the paprika, thyme and salt and pepper. Stir everything together well then bring to the boil.

4. Reduce the heat to simmer, cover and cook for about 30 minutes or until the potatoes are softened and tender. Serve piping hot, garnished with the parsley.

Friday, November 15, 2013

UK HEADLINES

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False Widow spiders invade young family's home A terrified young mum has told how more than 50 false widow spiders have moved into her home ­ in Crawley.

Stacey Cronin, 29, and her 15­month­old son, noticed one of Britain's most venomous spiders creeping in and out of a vent inside their house several weeks ago.

In an effort to starve the creature, she sealed it in.

But after three weeks she reopened the event and found not only was the spider still there ­ it had hatched out more than 40 babies, This Is Sussex reports.

"I was only recently asking my friend if she thought we'd ever find any false widows around here (Crawley), now I've found one has hatched eggs and taken over my house.

It's skin­crawling," she told the newspaper.

Stacey's partner John Lawrence had hoped sealing the false widow in would lead to its death.

But after that ploy failed, she has had to take more drastic action and blasted the baby spiders with fly­killer.

"I got rid of most of them and then found

the mother. She was happily dangling herself from our front door," said Stacey.

A male false widow remains on the loose but Stacey is hoping her German Shepherd will take care of it as apparently he enjoys eating them.

False widow spiders ­ Steatoda Nobilis in Latin ­ are no bigger than a 20p piece but they have the worst bite out of every spider species in the UK. They have a dark, shiny body with pale markings and cream band on their abdomen and are usually found in outbuildings.

They tend to be found more commonly in southern England and experts believe they arrived from the Canary Islands more than 100 years ago.

It is thought they are now spreading further across the country due to climate change.

They only bite when provoked and tend to cause humans a bee sting­style reaction, but some people can react far worse to it.

There have been several documented attacks from False Widow Spider in recent months.

A hotel guest emerged naked from a stor­ age cupboard of a Premier Inn with a fire extinguisher hose up his bottom, a court was told.

Joseph Small, 20, stripped off and grabbed the appliance on the fourth floor corridor of the budget hotel.

He then put the hose between his buttocks and began touching himself, Westminster magistrates’ court heard.

Small also urinated on the carpet before a hotel worker wrapped him in a towel and escorted him down to reception.

He then hurled abuse at the Bangladeshi member of staff, telling him: ‘This country has been taken over by al­Qaeda – go back to Pakistan.’

In the lobby, Small again urinated in front of tourists, shouting: ‘I come from Sheffield in England.’

He caused £450 damage, the court was told.

Small admitted criminal damage, racially aggravated harassment and outraging public decency at the Leicester Square, central London hotel on October 31.

Prosecutor Izolda Switala­Gribbin said: ‘A member of staff by the name of Hassan could see a naked man in the corridor on CCTV. He went with a towel and then escort­ ed him down to reception.

‘Hassan then watched CCTV showing the defendant coming out of a storage cup­ board, naked and urinating on the lift door.

The defendant could also be seen on CCTV placing a fire extinguisher hose and mastur­ bating at the same time. Hassan called the police.’

Small racially abused the two police offi­ cers who arrived.

The court was told Small had travelled from Sheffield to make a deal on a used car.

Sentencing was adjourned until December 3 for reports.

BOTTOMS UP

VILLAIN BATMAN BIN SUPARMAN JAILED With a name like Batman bin Suparman you would have expect­ ed this guy to stay on the right side of the law.

But in an ironic twist the Dark Knight’s namesake turned out to be a criminal who’s now been jailed in Singapore for his vil­ lainous ways.

Mr Suparman was jailed for 33 months for his criminal actions, which included stealing his brother’s bank card and using heroin.

The 23­year­old had been given the opportunity to use his unique name as a force for good after his supporters set up a Facebook account celebrating his title.

His fans made him a symbol they could rally behind when his identi­ fication, which reads Batman bin (son of) Suparman, was revealed.

Twitter user Gino Quillamor used a famous line from the Dark Knight movie to express his disappoint­ ment at Mr Suparman being jailed.

‘You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain,’ he wrote.

But others doubt a man with the name of two superheroes can be contained.

Mohamed Madi added: ‘What jail can pos­ sibly hold Batman bin­Suparman?’

30

Friday, November 15, 2013

SPANISH NEWS

NO LAUGHING MATTER

E­mails, which were hardly in the best possible taste, written by King Juan Carlos’ son­in­law have brought some more unwelcome publicity for the beleaguered Spanish Royal Family, after they were leaked to Spain’s newspapers. The husband of Spain’s Princess Cristina, Iñaki Urdangarin, Duke of Palma has been one of the country’s main bogey fig­ ures since an investigation began in 2010 into his alleged embezzlement of 6 million Euros of public funds. The couple’s life has been under the micro­ scope ever since, with Spain’s press revealing new insights into the degree of illicit business practices both were involved in. Now E­mails from Urdangarin’s computer seized as part of the on­going investigation reveal to some extent what the disgraced Duke is like as a person.

His sense of humour has been described as “tasteless” and “chauvinistic” by El Mundo, the first newspaper to pub­ lish Urdangarin’s email correspondence with Princess Cristina. The butt of some of his jokes is Letizia, Princess of

Asturias and wife of the heir to the throne, Felipe.

“What do Prince Felipe and Real Madrid have in com­ mon?” wrote Urdangarin to Cristina in the wake of the Princes of Asturias’ engagement. “They both f­­­ Alaleti (a play on words which refers to both the shortening of Letizia’s

name – Leti – and how Atlético de Madrid are casually known – Atleti).

In another E­mail, Urdangarin sent his wife a pho­ tomontage of famous Spanish newsreaders, including Letizia before she took on her royal role, under the title “orgasms”. The Duke of Palma also mocked Jaime de Marichalar, the husband of his sister­in­law, Elena, with a mock­up that compares his attire to that of Inspector Clouseau and Inspector Gadget. Another joke photo shows Queen Sofía and other royal family members looking bored at a sporting event at the Athens Olympics in 2004 under the title “Spanish Royals’ Holidays”.

Urdangarin also reveals a sexist side when forward­ ing his wife a joke about women's inability to under­ stand modern technology that suggests an iron could be used as a prototype computer mouse. He also sent his friends a spoof E­mail alleging he was taking on a job with a Government quango, attaching a photo of six topless girls with rifles as his “team”.

NOU SURRENDER Cops smash sex gang

THOUSANDS of demonstrators hit the Valencia region streets last weekend to protest over the planned closure of the regional public TV broadcaster, Nou. As reported by The Courier last week, the Valencian President, Alberto Fabra, decided to take the two services Nou and Nou 24 off the air, along with Radio Nou and to close the company which runs it, Radio Televisión Valenciana (RTVV). The decision was finan­ cially driven after a court vetoed planned redundancies of 1,000 members of staff. But the very next day, Fabra set aside over 30 million euros for the completion and running of Castellón airport for 20 years – a terminal which has yet to see a plane take off or land in the two years it has been officially open.

In the centre of Valencia (pictured), some 60,000 people waved banners calling for Fabra to resign, saying 'it's not the employ­ ees' fault', and 'no to closure of Nou – it's

ours'. They say the regional station, 'channel 9', is a public service and, aside from a few much smaller, local channels – many of which have already closed, it is the only one which broadcasts in the regional language of Valenciano. Some 1200 people demonstrat­ ed in Alicante City, with a thousand hitting the streets of Castellon.

Fabra had said he would 'rather close a TV channel than a school or hospital', but one of Nou's presenters, Clara Reyes, said it was not a question of choosing between these, but the fact that they were all fundamental rights of the people and should therefore be maintained. Members of each of the opposi­ tion parties joined in the protest, which included unions, Nou staff and newscasters, and members of the public. President Fabra was unmoved by the protests and reiterated last Sunday that he planned to go ahead with the closure.

The National Police have arrested 25 peo­ ple in a sex­trafficking ring that brought women from Nigeria to work as prostitutes in Spain. The women, allegedly lured with the promise of good jobs in Europe, were first flown to Mexico or Brazil, travelling on false identity documents.

From there, they were flown to Paris, and then smuggled into Spain to work in the sex trade, police say. Five women who were vic­ tims of the sex ring were freed in the raids with police finding one gang member per­ forming an abortion on one of the five women.

Arrests were made across the country in Madrid, Toledo, Cantabria and Palma de Mallorca, with more than 100 vans conceal­

ing luxury goods being seized. The gang used the vans to launder their profits and send them back to Lagos, police say. The vans, with dark­tinted windows and welded doors, were stocked full of beer but had lux­ ury items hidden deeper inside.

Goods worth an estimated 5 million Euros were found in 94 vans seized in Madrid and another 26 in the port of Valencia, including high­end televisions and cases of alcohol Police say the gang was formed more than 20 years ago in Nigerian universities and was also known for sending so­called Nigerian letters by email, asking recipients to send money. Eight of the 25 people arrested, were said to be illegally staying in the coun­ try.

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Friday, November 15, 2013

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com­ pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago hav­ ing left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

CRYPTO LOCKER VIRUS

Ok, I know that we are all cau­ tious when it comes to viruses and we always try to ensure that we have our anti­virus programs up to date. However, in reality the worst case scenario is that if you are unlucky enough to become infected all you will need to do is pay someone like me some folding stuff to come and sort it out for you. Even if you are badly infected, comput­ er experts can in most cases recover all of your important data (as long as you haven’t tried too hard to fix it yourself that is!)

Well that was until now! In our UK office we are starting to see more and more infections of the new Crypto Locker virus – and this one’s a real nasty! The virus works in a very similar way to others that we have common­ ly seen here. It is classed as “ransomware” so, like the FBI style virus that you have proba­ bly heard about, it locks you out of your computer and then demands some form of payment from you. Believe it or not I have had some customers feel so intimidated that they have actually paid up – all I can tell you is that the virus did not dis­ appear and of course the customer had handed over his credit card details to criminals; but I’m sure they wouldn’t use them again, would they??

As I was saying the Crypto Locker virus

is “ransomware” so it locks you out of your computer and demands money from you in order to get access again and in my experience even if you pay up you won’t get back into your computer. The difference with this virus is that it also

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:­ www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

encrypts all of your data! The upshot of this is that it’s going to be pretty much impossible to get your data back; and as I said before even if you pay them it’s still not very likely! The virus not only encrypts the data on your computer, but if you are part of a network (i.e. in an office) then it also encrypts any data that you have access to from your computer ­ like that on external hard drives (if they

are plugged in) and drives connected via network shares.

So if you are in an office this thing could cause some major issues!

This brings me, again, onto the subject of backups because this is your ONLY form of pro­ tection from this virus – if you don’t have a backup of your data then you will lose all your data, it’s really quite as simple as that. We can even do the backup for you…at our shop on the Moncayo market, we offer a free backup service when you buy one of our mem­ ory sticks and we even put a free program on your comput­ er so that you can continue to take your own backups going forward. If you have your own memory stick or external hard drive and just want the free program installing and setting up, with a bit of training, then pop along anyway ­ we are really not expensive and you would be protecting yourself from potentially losing every­ thing important to you on your computer.

Please remember to only open emails from people that you know. Don’t ever click on links in emails unless you are VERY sure that they are legitimate, some of these emails look very legitimate, but just “engage brain before clicking”. If you are ever unsure then give me a ring before you click!

Don’t forget to pick up next week’s Courier for the Crypto Virus – Update (how to protect yourself!)

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Horoscopes Aries March 21 ­ April 19 Have you ever longed to be a movie star or participate in some way in the film industry? Today you might get your chance or at least learn some of the tech­ nical skills required. You might take some time to learn about computer graphics or the ins and outs of camerawork. You could also meet some people involved in this industry.

Taurus April 20 ­ May 20 You've been exerting yourself a little too much over the past few days and might feel a little listless. Nonetheless, your mind is still active, and you may seek stimulation through books, TV, or lectures of some kind. You should find whatever you learn exciting. It could set you off in a new direction. Today you could turn into an armchair traveler!

Gemini May 21 ­ June 20 You could have some very strange yet beautiful dreams today. Write them down.

They're trying to tell you something. You could also make an off­the­wall plan to increase your income that may or may not work. Consider all the aspects of your plan and get in touch with the reality of it before delving too far. It might be workable but not in the ways you think now.

Cancer June 21 ­ July 22 Today you may start to see your friends in a new light. Perhaps their accomplishments have aroused your admiration. A special per­ son could seem more perfect than ever, and you could suddenly view your friend through a romantic haze once more. Bear in mind that your view of these people only mirrors your view of yourself. Recognize your merits as well others'.

By Pandora Leo July 23 ­ August 22 You might feel a little under the weather today, but mentally you're flying high.

Ideas could keep popping into your head, sending you into flights of fancy that excite your creativity. This is a great day to read or watch documentaries or other­ wise feed your intellect. Whatever you learn could be of great practical use to you later.

Virgo August 23 ­ September 22 Today you might seek to expand your knowledge of the arts. You could decide to explore galleries, attend a concert or play, or look into the latest best sellers. A friend could accompany you. Make a day of it!

Books, antiques, or other fine objects might be especially appealing now. Try to avoid shopping. You'll discover a lot of items you like and want to buy!

Libra September 23 ­ October 22 Today you might have the desire to look into your genealogy. The Internet has made it possible for everyone to learn about their ancestors, and now is a great time for you to do it. Spiritually, you might also decide to explore past lives or get in touch with spirit guides or totem animals.

Group activities could be of great help in these pursuits.

Scorpio October 23 ­ November 21 Practical, scientific, or spiritual ideas of all kinds are your life's blood. Today you might expand your knowledge. Much of what you learn may be based on technol­ ogy such as telescopes or particle acceler­ ators. You're only scratching the surface today. Much of what you learn may be con­ fusing, but stay with it. It will make more sense to you later.

Sagittarius November 22 ­ December 21 Today you might enlist the aid of friends to increase your computer skills. You may be interested in the artistic side of computers and want to experiment with computer graphics or animation. Video journalism could also be of interest. You might receive some unexpected good news about a possible increase in income, though it might be delayed.

Capricorn December 22 ­ January 19 A new romance could come your way. An old friend could suddenly seem like more to you, sending the relationship in an entirely new direction. The opposite could happen, too. An old love could reappear and resurrect the intellectual side of your relationship, making a new friend out of an old love. Circumstances around you are changing and so are you.

You're the type to welcome it!

Aquarius January 20 ­ February 18 Insights that well up from deep within you could put your imagination into overdrive.

Perhaps ideas for essays, poems, paint­ ings, or music flow into your mind in waves.

You may want to stay home to develop them, though you may take one friend, or perhaps your partner, into your confidence.

Keep the ideas coming! They might mean more to you later.

Pisces February 19 ­ March 20 News about the plight of the world's disad­ vantaged might have you toying with the idea of doing more than you are to make a difference. This is a laudable goal, but you're more apt to see the romantic side of helping the needy than the harsh realities of the situation. Before deciding to tackle any new ambition today, consider it from all angles. You might change your mind.

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

Nissan BladeGlider revealed The Nissan BladeGlider is an all­ electric sports car inspired by the radi­ cal Deltawing Le Mans car. It’ll debut at the Tokyo Motor Show later this month and Nissan bosses have even hinted to us that it’s set to make it to production.

You can see from the radical styling of this two­door that there’s plenty to be done before it’ll clear safety regulations for production models but Nissan is serious about the BladeGlider and said it could be in production within three years.

Andy Palmer, Nissan’s executive vice president, said: “We have a buck (pro­ totype) running based on an Ariel Atom with a narrow track at the front – I’ve driven it and it’s sensational. With the batteries positioned low down the grip is incredible.”

So what is the BladeGlider all about?

“A clean slate was the starting point for this project,” says Francois Bancon, product strategy general manager. “The goal was to revolutionize vehicle architecture to change the way we think about cars, and to see how zero emissions can help redefine our conception of vehicle basics.”

Nissan says that the BladeGlider production car could be the first use of in­wheel electric motors.

The inspiration for the car’s 1.0­meter wide front tread and over 1.8m rear width comes from the Deltawing Le Mans car, which proved that its design helps improve handling and aerodynamics. Unlike the Le Mans car, this concept has seating for three, with the driver sitting in the middle with two passengers behind and to each side.

British designer Ben Bowlby, who penned the 2012

Deltawing and the ZEOD (Zero Emission On Demand) race car slated for next year’s Le Mans, is the driving force behind the BladeGlider’s unique silhouette. “By its very nature, the Deltawing shape with its narrow front 10 cm wide tyres, wide rear track and downforce maximizing underbody does not need huge rear wings like other race cars to keep it planted to the road.” And those narrow front tyres develop enough grip to corner at over 120mph.

It all sounds like an exciting future for Nissan’s sports cars, and all the signs are that is going to happen. Take it from Palmer: “The BladeGlider tries to make the connection between GT Academy, Nismo and a new Genre of sports cars that’ll appeal to a new generation of car fans… I have every intention of making it happen.”

Motorbikes 'surprise' car drivers An AA/Populus survey showed that 57% of car driv­ ers were often surprised when a motorcycle appeared from nowhere.

Those most caught out were female drivers and motorists over 65 years old.The poll revealed 92% of car drivers recognised motor­ cyclists were vulnerable and always gave them more space.

If there were a lot more motorcycles on the roads, 54% of car drivers said they would be more aware of motorcycles, 25% would be more likely to consider motor­ cyclists as legitimate road users and 13% would person­ ally consider using a motorcy­ cle for their daily commute.

In addition, more bikes would mean 35% of car driv­ ers would make more con­ cessions in their driving for motorcyclists and 24% would hope that more drivers took to motorcycles so they could benefit from reduced conges­ tion.

The figures are highlighted today by AA president

Edmund King who is addressing a motorcycle con­ ference in London.

Mr King said: "We need to ensure that drivers are much more aware of the presence and possible presence of motorbikes and indeed cycles on our roads.

He went on: "We have heard much lately about improving the safety of cyclists from the Prime Minister downwards, yet motorcyclists appear to be the forgotten cousins.

"And yet motorbikes and scooters can play a vital role in helping to reduce conges­ tion and enhance mobility in our towns and cities.

"We need a step change in attitudes to provide a positive role for powered two­wheel­ ers in our transport strategy.

Safer, more fuel­efficient bikes coupled with serious inclusion of motorcycling within transport policy could bring benefits for all road users.

"All too often motorcycling is written off as deemed to be unsafe."

SAT NAV GAFFE

Sometimes footballers are unfairly criti­ cised for apparent stupidity and reckless abandon, while on other occasions it appears to be more justified.

ED will leave you to make up your own minds after reading this blog, but Liverpool's Andre Wisdom may have not quite lived up to his name in this situation.

The Premier League defender was forced to leave his £100,000 Porsche abandoned in a muddy trough after his satellite navigation system led him through the country roads.

Wisdom, the England U21 captain, was sent through quiet forest roads on Friday night by his car's Sat Nav which left him walk­ ing three miles to a main road after his car ended up getting stuck in the mud.

He is currently on loan at Derby County and was on his way to their home game with Sheffield Wednesday at the weekend when the incident occurred.

A Derby County spokesman said: "Andre visited a local shop on the way to Saturday's game against Sheffield Wednesday and, being new and unfamiliar to the area, he pro­

grammed the stadium's postcode into his Sat Nav. He added: "The route provided took him down a less than traditional road, where con­ ditions were also poor, and ultimately his car got stuck."

Local mountain biker Pete Irons found Wisdom's Porsche Panamera Turbo, worth £100,000, in the ditch close to Breadsall Priory Marriot Hotel outside Derby.

He informed the police and was shocked to think the car had got that far in the terrible conditions.

He said: "To get to that point he would have to have come through an equally muddy sec­ tion, I have no idea what he was thinking.

"We are miles from any main road, and the track doesn't go anywhere, it's just mind bog­ gling how he ended up there.

"I think it will definitely need a bit of TLC in a garage."

Wisdom may just find himself subjected to chants along the lines of "Where is your Porsche? Where is your Porsche? Andre Wisdom, where is your Porsche?"

Friday, November 15, 2013

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Friday, November 15, 2013

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 21 represents N and 20 represents K, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across

Down

1 Sailor (6) 4 Adventurous courage (6) 9 Raise (7) 10 Clan (5) 11 Colossus (5) 12 Exceed (7) 13 Travel over snow (3) 14 Mechanical man (5) 16 Musical drama (5) 18 Bath (3) 19 Realise beforehand (7) 21 Trades (5) 23 Adjust (5) 24 Absolve (7) 25 Damaged (6) 26 Edict (6)

1 Protection (7) 2 Skilled (5) 3 Opposing (7) 5 Following (5) 6 Copy (7) 7 Conjecture (5) 8 Doggedness (11) 15 Wall (7) 16 Indecent (7) 17 Stark (7) 19 Momentary gleam of light (5) 20 From that time on (5) 22 Of or relating to the moon (5)

Last weeks Solution

Across: 1 Avatar, 4 Assist, 9 Mariner, 10 Again, 11 Seeks, 12 Precise, 13 Embarrassed, 18 Lenient, 20 Rifle, 22 Cling, 23 Orifice, 24 Dinner, 25 Debris.

Down: 1 Almost, 2 Agree, 3 Amnesia, 5 Scare, 6 Imagine, 7 Tender, 8 Preparation, 14 Mention, 15 Survive, 16 Placid, 17 Recess, 19 Eagle, 21 Friar.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross­Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 A meeting to discuss the Foreign Office with some spirit (5) 4 Starters in classy hotel elegantly fashioned, by him? (4) 8 The coming of a royal rival (7) 9 In Colorado, rich men give the order (5) 10 The French money fol­ lows ancient language (5) 11 Showed disdain but was seen to go off red (7) 12 Painter and lathe­oper­ ator (6) 14 Fraud by heartless punks or rascals (6) 18 Shelter point for run­ away (7) 20 Confuse, be loud and go back (5) 22 Be with Josh in fix (5) 23 Noble ancestry depict­ ed in eagle (7) 24 Girl’s in love in a short time (4) 25 Small piece preceding debut of Tchaikovsky’s

choral work (5) Down 1 Silver fir starlings har­ bour start (5) 2 Still be apologetic going round for money (7) 3 Breakwater in the street to cause trouble (6) 4 Raced off for small group (5) 5 A murder suspect, one hears? (7) 6 Meat permit issued by small community (6) 7 Compound discovered about 101 AD (4) 13 A yobbo from a tumble­ down funfair (7) 15 CIA bent management for the government (7) 16 Heard team and breathed deeply (6) 17 Wrongly blamed for pandemonium (6) 18 It’s the judge’s habit to steal a note (4) 19 Inexperienced bowler’s environment (5) 21 Iron, a good man’s big spread (5)

STANDARD CLUES Down Across 1 In the lead (5) 1 Meeting place (5) 2 Earnings (7) 4 Cook (4) 3 Annoy continually (6) 8 Flight board listing (7) 4 Key personnel group (5) 9 Architectural style (5) 5 Tympanic membrane (7) 10 Romance language (5) 6 Village (6) 11 Displayed disdain (7) 7 Sour (4) 12 Famous landscape 13 Thug (7) painter (6) 15 Piece of furniture (7) 14 Little rascals (6) 16 Exhaled audibly (6) 18 Fugitive (7) 17 Place of uproar (6) 20 Obscure (5) 18 Loose outer garment (4) 22 Cash inducement (5) 19 Colour between blue 23 Ancestry (7) and yellow in the spectrum 24 Immediately (4) (5) 25 Musical composition (5) 21 Banquet (5) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Locust, 4 Cuscus, 8 Turnips, 10 Carve, 11 Stave, 12 Stepson, 13 Check, 15 Bream, 20 Alabama, 22 Bulge, 23 Elate, 24 Tonight, 25 Almost, 26 Unroll.

Down: 1 Latest, 2 Car wash, 3 Smile, 5 Unclear, 6 Cords, 7 Skeins, 9 So­so, 14 Clarets, 16 Allegro, 17 Camera, 18 Fast, 19 Lentil, 21 Alarm, 22 Benin.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words Any Ash Bra Ems Ess Eta Eve Far Has One Pea Pep Rev Saw Sup 4 letter

words Alee Ales Alms Area Beta Buns Earl Else Ires Lace Lose Moil Pros Sane Seer Send Sent

Sets Skat Slid Soda Tees Toga Wits 5 letter words Aloha Begat Class Early Ernie Gross Leeds Macro Newsy

Nitre Robin Scone Stile Taser Trine Troop 6 letter words Agency Galore Korean Lie low Petard Reheat Settee Soirée Stigma

Teasel Typing Unseen 7 letter words Elapses Prefabs Revalue Sidearm 8 letter words Coherent Loophole 11 letter words Convenience Generalship Hairstylist

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD

Improve your Spanish ­ clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 August (6) 4 Dressing gowns (5) 9 Shell (of egg, nut) (7) 10 Basket (5) 11 To smell (4) 12 Reno (8) 14 Chairs (6) 16 Ruidos (6) 19 Quantity (8) 20 Healthy (4) 23 New (5) 24 Clima (7) 25 To take down (5) 26 Fiebres (síntomas) (6) Down 1 Anchovies (salted,

tinned) (7) 2 Western (side, part) (5) 3 Equipo (deporte) (4) 5 Lift (elevator) (8) 6 Respuestas (a pregun­ tas, en examen, test) (7) 7 Panadero (5) 8 Puerta (de casa, vehículo, armario) (4) 13 Butterfly (insect) (8) 15 Lentil (7) 17 Duchas (7) 18 Salsa (5) 19 Dinner (supper) (4) 21 Despierto (no dormi­ do) (5) 22 Fuego (llamas) (4)

37

Friday, November 15, 2013 Across 1 Which word completes the title of a famous BBC television sitcom created and written by Dick Clement and Ian La Frenais, first broadcast in 1964: The (What) Lads? (6) 4 What name for a person who has been honourably dis­ charged from public duties is derived from the Latin for ‘having been earned.’? (8) 10 Which mountain on the border between France and Italy is the highest peak in the Alps and in western Europe? (4,5) 11 What name is given to the large nest of an eagle or other bird of prey, built high in a tree or on a cliff? (5) 12 Which brown material con­ sisting of partly decomposed vegetable matter forming a deposit on acidic, boggy, ground, is dried for use in gar­ dening and as fuel? (4) 13 What name is given to a period of approximately 27.32 days, the length of time taken by the moon in its orbit about the Earth to return to the same point as viewed against the back­ ground of stars? (5,5) 15 What name is often applied to liquid material, gener­ ally saliva, that dribbles or drools outward and downward from the

mouth? (7) 16 Which republic in north­ eastern Europe is bordered to the north by Estonia, to the south

by Lithuania, to the east by Russia, and to the southeast by Belarus and by a maritime bor­ der to the west with Sweden? (6) 19 Which adjective means 'being or relating to or resem­ bling or emanating from stars'?

(6) 21 Which bass woodwind instrument of the oboe family, with a doubled­back tube over four feet long, is played with a double reed? (7) 23 According to in the New Testament of The Bible, what name is given to the last battle between good and evil before the Day of Judgement? (10) 25 Which rough fibre made from the stems of a tropical Old World plant, is used for making twine and rope or woven into sacking or matting? (4) 27 Which piece of cutlery with a shallow bowl­shaped contain­ er and a handle is used to stir, serve or take up food? (5) 28 Which adjective means 'continuing forever, or for an indefinitely long time'? (9) 29 What name is often applied to newspapers or peri­ odicals issued every seven

SUDOKU (Very Easy)

Quiz Word

days? (8) 30 Which village in western Northamptonshire was the scene of a battle in 1645 that settled the outcome of the first

English Civil War as the Parliamentarians won a major victory over the Royalists? (6) Down 1 According to his famous

song, what was George Formby leaning on ‘in case a certain little lady came by’? (8) 2 Which large plant­eating marsupials with long powerful tails and strongly developed hind limbs that enable them to travel by leaping, are found only in Australia and New Guinea? (9) 3 What was the stage name of performer Roland Kent LaVoie, who reached number four in the UK Top 10 in 1971 with his debut single Me and You and a Dog Named Boo? (4) 5/24 Which American film­ maker, author, social critic and political activist produced and directed the 2004 film Fahrenheit 9/11, the highest­ grossing documentary of all time and winner of the Palme d'Or? (7,5) 6 Which non­specific term is often used for medical problems affecting the joints and connec­ tive tissue? (10) 7 Which on the River Po, the capital of Piedmont region was the capital of the kingdom of Sardinia from 1720 and became the first capital of a unified Italy in 1861? (5) 8 Which verb that means to be filled with intense but unex­ pressed anger, comes from the Old English for ‘make or keep

boiling’? (6) 9 Which large, heavily­built cat that has a yellowish­brown coat with black spots, is found mainly in the dense forests of Central and South America? (6) 14 Which adjective meaning ‘inhabiting or existing in a land from the earliest times or from before the arrival of colonists’ comes from the Latin for ‘from the beginning’? (10) 17 In medicine, which verb means to introduce an antigenic substance or vaccine into the body to produce immunity to a specific disease? (9) 18 What name is often given to the descendants of one indi­ vidual? (8) 20 What title was given to a 19th century English workman who destroyed laboursaving machinery that he thought would cause unemployment, especial­ ly in cotton and woollen mills? (7) 21 What name for a wild or half­tamed horse of the western US comes from the Spanish for ‘rough’? (6) 22 Which city is the capital and largest city of Poland? (6) 24 See 5 26 Which is the largest of the world's continents, constituting nearly one third of the land mass? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

LA LIMPIEZA ­ CLEANING Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

music QUIZ

ANSEWRS: 1. Europe 2. Sting 3. Pepsi & Shirlie 4. TRUE 5. Billy Preston & Syreeta 6. SOS 7. The Shamen 8. Eddie 9. 18 10. Mr Blobby 11. 1986

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Word Solution Across: 1 Calico, 4 Pious, 8 Femur, 9 Almoner, 10 Elapses, 11 Neon, 14/12 Yoko Ono, 15 Ruth, 18 Yes, 21 Abel, 23 Latrine, 25 Diocese, 26 Rabbi, 27 Rayon, 28 Bolero.

Down: 1 Coffee, 2 Lumbago, 3 Chris Hoy, 4 Puma, 5 Ounce, 6 Spring, 7 Lasso, 13 Oratorio, 16 Thimble, 17 Gander, 19 Sleet, 20 De Niro, 22 Ebony, 24 Bern.

la fregona

el detergente

la lavadora

el jabón

la lejía

el recogedor

la plancha

el trapo

la secadora

la aspiradora

limpiar

la escoba

quitar el polvo

la esponja

reciclar

Empareja estas palabras ­ Match the Spanish and English words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz.

1.el delantal, 2.el detergente,

15.quitar el polvo, 16.reciclar.

j.the detergent, k. the soap, l.to clean, m.the mop,

3.el jabón, 4.el recogedor, 5.el trapo, 6.la aspiradora,

a.the washing machine,

n.to recycle, o.the sponge,

7.la escoba, 8.la esponja,

b.the bleach, c.the drier,

p.to dust.

.la fregona, 10.la lavadora,

vacuum cleaner, e.the broom,

11.la lejía, 12.la plancha,

f.the dustpan, g.the apron,

13.la secadora, 14.limpiar,

h.the duster (rag), i.the iron,

Soduko

Span ­ Eng

Quizword

Answers: 1g, 2j, 3k, 4f, 5h, 6d, 7e, 8o, 9m, 10a, 11b, 12i, 13c, 14l, 15p, 16n.

1. Which Group Had A Hit With The Final Countdown?

2. Which Famous Singer Got Their Name Because Of A Black & Yellow Jumper That They Often Wore?

3. Who Recorded the Album 'Alright Now' ­ 'Change' & 'Heartache'?

4. True Or False Eddie Van Halen Played Guitar On Michael Jacksons Hit 'Beat It'?

5. With You Im Born Again' Reached No.2 In 1979 For Which Pair?

6. Which Song By The Palindromic Pop Group Abba Had a Palindromic Title?

7. Who Had A Hit With With 'Ebeneezer Goode'?

8. Name Iron Maiden's famous mascot (depicted on the cover of Sanctuary standing over Margaret Thatcher's decapitated body) 9. Tie Breaker:­ Number of Beatles songs with a woman's name in the title?

10. Which Pink Creation From Noel's House Party Had A UK No.1 In 1993?

11. In Which Year Were The Housemartins Having A Happy Hour?

el delantal

Fill It In

38

Friday, November 15, 2013

TRELI ON THE TELLY SNATCH OF THE DAY

the BBC and BT Sport, and so Adrian Chiles and his mates are basically out of a job. I rate Chiles highly, but the commentaries of Clive Tyldesley and Andy I wonder what morale is Townsend have always been like in the corridors of ITV second rate, along with the Sport after losing the channel’s poor production rights to the Champions values. I also believe that the League and the Europa big ITV bosses will not be League from 2015? losing too much sleep as BT Sport have dumped all their sports department reels over the free to air broad­ caster, and destroyed Sky’s midweek nights into the bar­ gain by scooping the whole lot in a deal close to 1 billion pounds. It’s a hell of a coup, but it also means that there will be no live free to air ter­ restrial coverage of European club football for the first time since the old days of watching black and white flickering images with the commentary of Kenneth Wolstenholme.

For ITV Sport it’s a disas­ ter, as all they have left in their live football portfolio are a handful of England interna­ tionals. Remember that they have also lost the FA Cup to

with ALEX TRELINSKI

in shock, since the live Champions League action on the Tuesday night has strug­ gled to beat Holby City in the ratings, and was destroyed by the Great British Bake Off. I hope that they take all the millions that they have saved and invest it in high quality drama, which as they’ve seen with Broadchurch this year, can deliver rich divi­ dends. The BBC must be

having a quiet snigger, since they’ve got back the FA Cup, and have the excellent Match of the Day running as strong as ever, alongside the Football League Show.

For Sky Sports, this is a very serious blow indeed.

They’ve been left to cry over spilled milk saying that BT have heavily overbid for the new contract, but of course that’s what Sky used to do

themselves. As Corporal Jones would say in Dad’s Army, they don’t like it up them! There’s a lot of airtime for Sky left to fill, and they must be terrified of BT trying to get the bulk of the Premier League when the contracts come up again in 3 years time. I’ve been surprised how bullish the new boy on the block has been, and though Sky still has the majority of

the Premier League matches for the time being in a recent­ ly struck deal, BT Sport now has a very compelling domestic and international football line up, especially when the European contract kicks in. I’ve been impressed overall by the quality of their output, and that also takes in their Rugby Union Premiership coverage as well. BT is nothing like the failed ITV Sports Channel, Setanta, or ESPN, and they clearly have some massive pockets. The next 3 years could well see the end of Sky Sports as the home for foot­ ball in the UK, and who could have predicted that? By the way, BT have been sensible and have said that the Euro finals will be screened free­ to­air, and they’ll also screen at least one free match involving every British club in the Euro competitions. That piece of common sense should be applauded and is also very good business, along with their vastly lower subscription rates. A penny for Mr.Murdoch’s thoughts?

The Courier Friday TV

November 15

00:35 01:20 01:25 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

This Week Holiday Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Neighbourhood Blues Homes Under the Hammer Saints and Scroungers Escape to the Country Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Moving On Pressure Pad Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds Antiques Road Trip Pointless Celebrities BBC News BBC London News The One Show Children in Need BBC News Regional News and Weather Children in Need

07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:30 Homes Under the Hammer 08:30 Saints and Scroungers 09:15 Real Rescues 10:00 Flog It! Trade Secrets 11:00 Question Time 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Two Rode Together 14:45 Cash in the Attic 15:30 Floyd on France 16:00 Cagney & Lacey 16:45 Are You Being Served?

17:15 'Allo 'Allo!

17:45 Fred Dibnah's World of Steam, Steel and Stone 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing ­ It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 Cold War, Hot Jets 23:00 Children in Need 23:35 Weather

00:50 The Jonathan Ross Show 01:40 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point: Lucky Stars 18:00 The Paul O'Grady Show 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live International Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 International Football Highlights

CHILDEN IN NEED 00:20 01:20 02:20 02:55 05:00 World 05:30 06:25 06:50

Tudor Monastery Farm The Review Show Panorama This Is BBC Two Schools ­ Welcome to the Schools ­ Same but Different Schools ­ Seeking Refuge What Makes Me, Me

Terry Wogan and Tess Daly present another bumper evening of fundraising fun, which sees a massive line­up of stars singing, dancing or acting plain daft in support of disadvantaged children across the UK. The fun kicks off with the cast of West End smash Matilda singing a medley of songs from the show, boy band JLS performing some of their greatest hits in Albert Square and a treat for Doctor Who fans with an exclusive clip from the long­awaited 50th anniversary episode, which is being shown in just over a week, on Saturday, November 23.

00:05 Dispatches 01:05 Rory Peck Awards 2013 01:10 999 02:05 24 Hours in A&E 03:00 One Born: What Happened Next?

03:55 Dispatches 04:25 Unreported World 04:50 Health Freaks 05:20 Deal or No Deal 06:15 Countdown 06:55 River Cottage Bites 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss USA 12:00 Beat My Build 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Kirstie's Handmade Treasures 13:25 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 16:30 Countdown 17:15 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 Unreported World 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Marvel's Agents of SHIELD 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 22:30 Man Down 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:00 Born to Kill?

01:00 SuperCasino 04:05 Bomb Patrol 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Milkshake! Monkey 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Construction Squad: Operation Homefront 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Nightmare at the End of the Hall 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Chris Tarrant Goes Fishing 21:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 22:00 On Benefits & Proud 23:00 Rambo

39

The Courier Saturday TV

November 16

03:00 Weatherview

00:10 Up in the Air

03:05 BBC News

01:55 Question Time

07:00 Breakfast

02:55 The Paradise

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live

03:55 This Is BBC Two 07:00 This Is BBC Two

12:30 Food & Drink

08:35 Emergency Call 13:00 Football Focus 10:05 The Journey of Natty Gann 13:45 Sportsday

11:40 Reel History of Britain

14:00 BBC News; Regional News

12:10 The Life of Birds

and Weather

13:00 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds

14:15 Bargain Hunt

13:45 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds

15:00 Live International Rugby

14:30 The A to Z of TV Cooking 15:15 EastEnders

Union 17:30 A Question of Sport

16:40 Escape to the Country 17:25 Flog It!

18:00 BBC News; Regional News

17:55 Live International Rugby Union

and Weather

20:30 Live Rugby League World Cup

18:20 Children in Need

23:00 QI

19:30 Strictly Come Dancing

23:30 Formula 1

21:00 Atlantis 21:50 The National Lottery Live 22:00 Casualty 22:50 BBC News; Weather 23:10 National Lottery Update 23:10 Pirates of the Caribbean: at

00:45 The Dales 01:15 Jackpot247 04:00 633 Squadron 05:35 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 08:50 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 09:15 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Munch Box 10:25 ITV News 10:30 The Home of Fabulous Cakes 11:30 Murder, She Wrote 12:25 ITV News and Weather 12:34 ITV Meridian Weather 12:35 Surprise Surprise 13:40 You've Been Framed!

14:10 Doc Martin 15:10 The X Factor 16:45 Star Wars Episode V: the Empire Strikes Back 19:05 ITV Meridian Weather 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:30 New You've Been Framed!

20:00 The Chase 21:00 The X Factor 22:30 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 Take Me Out

00:05 Stand Up for the Week 00:50 Was It Something I Said?

01:40 Gogglebox 02:25 All Tomorrow's Parties 03:55 The Big C 04:20 2 Broke Girls 04:45 Don't Trust the B**** in Apartment 23 05:05 Deal or No Deal 06:00 Countdown 06:45 River Cottage Bites 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Volleyball 09:00 The Morning Line 10:00 The American Football Show 11:05 Frasier 11:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 12:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:55 The Simpsons 13:25 Heston's Feast 14:30 Channel 4 Racing 17:00 Come Dine with Me 19:30 Channel 4 News 20:00 The Political Slot 20:05 Marvel's Agents of SHIELD 21:00 Grand Designs 22:00 Black Swan

BLACK SWAN

Psychological thriller starring Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis and Vincent Cassel. When aspiring ballerina Nina Sayers finally wins the coveted role of the Swan Queen in Swan Lake, it's a dream come true.

But while her demanding choreographer thinks Nina is perfect for the role, he has reservations about her ability to portray the Queen's alter ego, the Black Swan ­ a part that comes naturally to her sensuous rival Lily. As jealousy consumes Nina, her hold on reality becomes increasingly blurred.

World's End

00:40 Campus PD 01:10 SuperCasino 04:00 The True Story 04:50 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 House Doctor 05:50 Great Artists 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:35 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Make Way for Noddy 08:35 City of Friends 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:30 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers: Megaforce 11:35 Slugterra 12:00 Inside Hollywood 12:05 Ben Fogle's Animal Clinic 13:05 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 14:05 The Christmas Card 15:50 The Town Christmas Forgot 17:30 A Grandpa for Christmas 19:10 5 News Weekend 19:15 D­Day: The Ultimate Conflict 21:00 JFK's Secret Killer: The Evidence 22:00 Battle Scarred 23:00 Live Boxing

The Courier Sunday TV

November 17

07:55 The Velvet Touch 09:30 Alan Titchmarsh's Garden 01:45 Highlander: Endgame

Secrets

03:20 Weatherview

10:30 Gardeners' World

03:25 BBC News

11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites

07:00 Breakfast

12:30 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds

10:00 The Andrew Marr Show

13:15 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds

11:00 Sunday Morning Live

14:00 Food & Drink

12:00 Sunday Politics

14:30 Rugby Union

13:15 Bargain Hunt

15:30 Live Rugby League World

14:00 BBC News

Cup 14:10 Weather for the Week Ahead 18:00 Flog It! 14:15 Escape to the Country 19:00 JFK: The Final Visit to Britain 15:15 Points of View 19:30 Days That Shook the World 15:30 Live International Rugby

20:00 Coast

Union

20:05 Kennedy Home Movies

18:05 Lifeline

21:00 Great Continental Railway

18:15 Songs of Praise

Journeys

18:50 BBC News; Regional News

22:00 Africa 2013: Countdown to the

and Weather

Rains

19:15 Countryfile

23:00 Respect: A Felix Dexter

20:15 Strictly Come Dancing

Special

21:00 The Paradise

23:30 Hebburn

22:00 Britain and the Sea 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Formula 1

00:45 Stark Raving Mad 02:20 Radio On 04:00 This Is BBC Two 07:00 This Is BBC Two

01:00 Jackpot247 04:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Babar and the Adventures of Badou 07:10 Matt Hatter Chronicles 07:35 Dino Dan 08:00 Canimals 08:25 Sooty 08:35 Horrid Henry 08:50 Victorious 09:15 Bottom Knocker Street 09:30 Fort Boyard Ultimate Challenge 10:25 ITV News 10:30 Storage Hoarders 11:30 Sunday Side Up 12:30 Sunday Scoop 13:30 ITV News and Weather 13:34 ITV Meridian Weather 13:35 Inside the National Trust 14:35 Love Your Garden 15:35 The X Factor 17:05 Downton Abbey 18:35 Prize Island 19:35 ITV News Meridian 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Coronation Street 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!

23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 Off Their Rockers

BRITAIN AND THE SEA New series. Broadcaster David Dimbleby sails his yacht Rocket along the British coastline, exploring different aspects of the nation's maritime history, art and architecture along the way. He begins along the south­west coast of Devon and Cornwall, where he tells the story of Sir Francis Drake and an array of adventurers, explorers, pirates and smugglers.

00:10 The Deep Blue Sea 02:05 Stand Up for the Week 02:50 Paddy's TV Guide 03:35 05:40 06:20 07:10 08:05 09:00 09:30 10:00 10:30 13:30 13:55 14:25 16:30 18:35 20:40 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30 23:55

Hollyoaks 90210 Deal or No Deal The American Football Show Blancpain Endurance Series Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Sunday Brunch The Big Bang Theory The Simpsons Channel 4 Racing Congo Night at the Museum Channel 4 News Secret History Homeland Was It Something I Said?

Toast of London Alan Carr: Chatty Man

01:00 SuperCasino 04:10 Charley Boorman's Extreme Frontiers 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Bubble Guppies 07:40 The Mr Men Show 07:50 Chloe's Closet 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Make Way for Noddy 08:30 City of Friends 08:45 Little Princess 08:55 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:15 Angelina Ballerina 09:30 Rupert Bear 09:45 Milkshake! Monkey 09:50 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:00 Toby's Travelling Circus 10:15 Jelly Jamm 10:30 LazyTown 11:00 Power Rangers: Super Samurai 11:35 Slugterra 12:00 The Hotel Inspector 13:00 Cowboy Builders 14:00 Police Interceptors 15:00 Little Nicky 16:35 Click 18:35 Lucky Christmas 20:15 5 News Weekend 20:20 Rush Hour 2 22:00 The Book of Eli

40

The Courier Monday TV

November 18

01:25 Weatherview 01:30 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Neighbourhood Blues 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Escape to the Country 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Moving On 16:00 Pressure Pad 16:45 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Caught Red Handed 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Fake Britain 22:00 Ripper Street 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Have I Got a Bit More News for You

00:00 00:30 01:15 02:45 03:40 04:40 07:35 08:35

Never Mind the Buzzcocks Rugby League World Cup More than Just a Game Countryfile Holby City This Is BBC Two Homes Under the Hammer Saints and Scroungers

09:20 Real Rescues 10:05 The House That £100K Built 11:05 Swansea Market 11:35 Click 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Rugby League World Cup 14:45 Coast 15:30 Floyd on France 16:00 Cagney & Lacey 16:45 Are You Being Served?

17:15 'Allo 'Allo!

17:45 Fred Dibnah's World of Steam, Steel and Stone 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing ­ It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 MasterChef: The Professionals 22:00 The Choir: Sing While You Work 23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:30 Newsnight

00:15 Anglo­Welsh Cup Rugby Union 01:15 The Store 03:15 Motorsport UK 04:05 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV News Meridian 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point: Lucky Stars 18:00 The Paul O'Grady Show 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Tales from Northumberland with Robson Green 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!

23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV Meridian Weather 23:35 The Agenda

00:55 Fresh Meat 01:45 American Football Live 05:45 KOTV Boxing Weekly 06:15 Deal or No Deal 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss Australia 12:00 Beat My Build 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 SuperScrimpers 13:20 Winchester '73 15:10 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Dispatches 21:30 Health Freaks 22:00 Fear of Flying: Caught on Camera 23:00 Fresh Meat 23:50 Cardinal Burns

7 DAYS THAT MADE THE FÜHRER John Hannah narrates a documentary examining pivotal moments in Adolf Hitler's pre­Second World War adult life, from his rejection by Vienna's Academy of Fine Arts in the early years of the 20th century to Germany's annexation of Austria in 1938.

00:15 Once upon a Time in Mexico 02:15 SuperCasino 04:10 The Gadget Show 05:00 Wildlife SOS 05:25 Make It Big 05:50 Roary the Racing Car 06:00 Angels of Jarm 06:10 Hana's Helpline 06:20 Angels of Jarm 06:30 The Funky Valley Show 06:40 Roary the Racing Car 06:50 Hana's Helpline 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Milkshake! Monkey 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Police Interceptors 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Amish Grace 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Wild Things with Dominic Monaghan 21:00 The Gadget Show 22:00 7 Days That Made the Führer 23:00 The Wild Geese

The Courier Tuesday TV

November 19

00:20 01:55 02:00 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

It's a Wonderful Afterlife Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Neighbourhood Blues Homes Under the Hammer Saints and Scroungers Escape to the Country Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Moving On Pressure Pad Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds Antiques Road Trip Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show EastEnders Holby City Last Tango in Halifax BBC News National Lottery Update Imagine

07:35 Homes Under the Hammer 08:35 Saints and Scroungers 09:20 Real Rescues 10:05 Antiques Roadshow 11:05 The Culture Show 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Cash in the Attic 14:45 Coast 15:30 Floyd on France 16:00 Cagney & Lacey 16:45 Are You Being Served?

17:15 'Allo 'Allo!

17:45 Fred Dibnah's World of Steam, Steel and Stone 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing ­ It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals 22:00 Strange Days: Cold War Britain 23:00 Hebburn 23:30 Newsnight

00:10 Animal Heroes 01:05 Jackpot247 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point: Lucky Stars 18:00 The Paul O'Grady Show 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live International Football 23:10 ITV News and Weather 23:40 ITV News Meridian 23:40 ITV Meridian Weather 23:45 International Football Highlights

MASTERCHEF 00:20 The Kennedys 01:50 Africa 2013: Countdown to the Rains 02:50 Film 2013 03:20 This World 04:20 This Is BBC Two 05:00 Schools ­ Make a Musical 06:00 Schools ­ Bringing Books to Life 2 07:00 This Is BBC Two

Four of the eight chefs from yesterday's heat return to face a skills test in which they must each create a savoury sabayon sauce and use it to make a glaze for seafood. Michel Roux Jr then challenges them to prepare French pork pie stuffed with chestnuts and apple and served with a British salad cream, before the contenders pre­ pare their own choice of dish to be judged by Michel and Monica Galetti, who pick three to advance to the quarter­final.

00:25 Man Down 00:55 Rory Peck Awards 2013 01:00 The Shooting Gallery 01:30 The Woman in the Fifth 03:00 Nashville 03:45 90210 04:25 SuperScrimpers 05:20 Deal or No Deal 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss Australia 12:00 Beat My Build 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 River Cottage Bites 13:20 Guadalcanal Diary 15:10 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Obsessive Compulsive Cleaners 22:00 The Sound of Musicals 23:00 Masters of Sex

01:40 Lost Heroes of World War One 02:05 SuperCasino 04:10 Countdown to Murder 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Milkshake! Monkey 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ben Fogle's Animal Clinic 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Christmas in Canaan 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Jungle Babies: Tarsier Tails 20:30 5 News Update 21:00 Cowboy Builders 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 Castle

41

The Courier Wednesday TV

November 20

00:45 The Girl in the Park 02:30 Weatherview 02:35 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Neighbourhood Blues 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:45 Escape to the Country 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Moving On 16:00 Pressure Pad 16:45 Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds 17:30 Antiques Road Trip 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 BBC London News 20:00 The One Show 21:00 Nigel and Adam's Farm Kitchen 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 National Lottery Update 23:35 A Question of Sport

07:30 Homes Under the Hammer 08:30 Saints and Scroungers 09:15 Real Rescues 10:00 The Wonder of Dogs 11:00 Tom Kerridge's Proper Pub Food 11:30 See Hear 12:00 BBC News 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Lifeline 14:10 The A to Z of TV Gardening 14:30 Coast 15:30 Floyd on France 16:00 Cagney & Lacey 16:45 Are You Being Served?

17:15 'Allo 'Allo!

17:45 Fred Dibnah's World of Steam, Steel and Stone 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing ­ It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals 22:00 Tudor Monastery Farm 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Weather

00:45 01:30 04:00 04:45 06:05 07:00 09:30 10:25 11:30 13:30 14:30 14:55 15:00 16:00 16:59 17:00 18:00 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 Here!

23:30 23:55

The Jeremy Kyle Show USA Jackpot247 Loose Women ITV Nightscreen The Jeremy Kyle Show Daybreak Lorraine The Jeremy Kyle Show This Morning Loose Women ITV News and Weather ITV Meridian Weather 60 Minute Makeover Dickinson's Real Deal ITV Meridian Weather Tipping Point The Paul O'Grady Show ITV News Meridian ITV News and Weather Emmerdale Coronation Street Mystery Map I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of ITV News and Weather ITV News Meridian

MAGNUM FORCE 00:20 01:50 Work 02:50 03:50 04:55 05:25 06:05 06:35 07:00

The Kennedys The Choir: Sing While You Stephen Fry: Out There This Is BBC Two Schools ­ Just a Few Drinks Schools ­ L8R Youngers 2 Schools ­ Body Matters Ask Lara This Is BBC Two

00:10 00:55 01:00 02:00 02:30 03:25 04:20 05:10 05:50 06:35 07:00 07:10 08:05 08:30 08:55 10:00 11:00 12:00 13:00 13:05 13:25 15:10 Under 16:10 17:00 18:00 18:30 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:55 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:45

8 Out of 10 Cats Uncut Random Acts Poker KOTV Boxing Weekly Volleyball Blancpain Endurance Series SuperScrimpers Deal or No Deal Countdown Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard The Treacle People The Hoobs According to Jim Will & Grace Everybody Loves Raymond Frasier Undercover Boss Australia Beat My Build Channel 4 News Summary Kirstie's Vintage Home Carry On Spying Phil: Secret Agent Down Countdown Deal or No Deal Four in a Bed Come Dine with Me The Simpsons Hollyoaks Channel 4 News 4thought.tv Location, Location, Location 24 Hours in A&E Gogglebox Bouncers

Crime thriller starring Clint Eastwood as San Francisco cop "Dirty" Harry Callahan. Prominent local criminals are being targeted in a series of killings where the weapon is always the same: a .357 Magnum. As the investigation gets under way, Callahan and his boss have conflicting ideas about who is responsible.

00:00 Body of Proof 00:55 Countdown to Murder 01:50 SuperCasino 04:05 Battle Scarred 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:45 Milkshake! Monkey 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Cowboy Builders 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Chinese Food in Minutes 16:20 Jane Doe: How to Fire Your Boss 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Emergency Bikers 21:00 Ben Fogle's Animal Clinic 22:00 Nazi Quest for the Holy Grail 23:00 Magnum Force

The Courier Thursday TV

November 21

00:05 00:35 02:30 02:35 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Film 2013 American Beauty Weatherview BBC News Breakfast Neighbourhood Blues Homes Under the Hammer Saints and Scroungers Escape to the Country Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Moving On Pressure Pad Paul Hollywood's Pies & Puds Antiques Road Trip Pointless BBC News BBC London News The One Show EastEnders Animal Odd Couples Panorama BBC News Regional News and Weather Question Time

00:20 The Kennedys 01:05 The Kennedys 01:50 Strange Days: Cold War Britain 02:50 See Hear 03:20 This Is BBC Two 04:50 Schools ­ Apprentice for a Day 05:30 Schools: Music, Mud and Making Money 06:00 Schools ­ You Too Can Be an Absolute Genius 06:30 Found

06:45 Jona's Ark 07:00 This Is BBC Two 07:35 Homes Under the Hammer 08:35 Saints and Scroungers 09:20 Real Rescues 10:05 Dive WWII: Our Secret History 11:05 Tom Kerridge's Proper Pub Food 11:35 HARDtalk 12:00 BBC News 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Daily Politics 14:00 Cash in the Attic 14:45 Coast 15:30 Floyd on France 16:00 Cagney & Lacey 16:45 Are You Being Served?

17:15 'Allo 'Allo!

17:45 Fred Dibnah's World of Steam, Steel and Stone 18:15 Flog It! 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Strictly Come Dancing ­ It Takes Two 20:00 Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 21:00 MasterChef: The Professionals 22:00 An Adventure in Space and Time 23:30 Newsnight

00:05 Stiff Upper Lips 01:50 Jackpot247 04:00 American Dreamz 05:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:05 The Jeremy Kyle Show 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 ITV Meridian Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 ITV Meridian Weather 17:00 Tipping Point 18:00 The Paul O'Grady Show 19:00 ITV News Meridian 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Britain's Secret Treasures 22:00 I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!

23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 ITV News Meridian 23:35 The Jonathan Ross Show

BEDLAM A visit to a psychiatric ward for over­65s at the South London and Maudsley institution. Lorraine, 67, has forgotten her identity and cannot remem­ ber anything about her life, 86­year­old Peter doesn't want to take medication for his schizoaf­ fective disorder, while Vera, 82, is suffering from extreme anxiety and fears she may never have the confidence to live alone. Last in the series.

00:50 Drifters 01:20 Drifters 01:50 Random Acts 01:55 Fear of Flying: Caught on Camera 02:50 Harsh Times 04:45 SuperScrimpers 05:40 Deal or No Deal 06:35 Hugh's 3 Good Things: Best Bites 06:40 Countdown 07:25 The Treacle People 07:35 The Hoobs 08:05 According to Jim 08:30 Will & Grace 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Undercover Boss Australia 12:00 Beat My Build 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Kirstie's Vintage Gems 13:10 King Solomon's Mines 15:10 Phil: Secret Agent Down Under 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 George Clarke's Amazing Spaces 22:00 Bedlam 23:00 Bouncers

01:20 Poker 02:15 SuperCasino 04:05 Benidorm ER 04:55 House Doctor 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Great Artists 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Bananas in Pyjamas 07:10 Igam Ogam 07:20 Fireman Sam 07:35 The WotWots 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Olly the Little White Van 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Toby's Travelling Circus 09:50 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Tickety Toc 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Hotel Inspector 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:15 Lucky Christmas 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 NewsTalk Live 20:00 Police Interceptors 21:00 Charley Boorman's Extreme Frontiers 22:00 Children of the Master Race 23:00 Person of Interest

42

Friday, November 15, 2013

AUCTIONS

Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.vil­ laandvacation.com or Call:

965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 or 3 bed / 2 bath apart­ ments in San Miguel. Lift, communal rooftop pool & solarium, video entry sys­ tem. Available for short or long term rent from 350 pcm. Tel 966723437 or 616 493 487. (148) Ref: 61, A lovely two bed­ roomed ground floor apart­ ment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swim­ ming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking dis­ tance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apart­ ment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bed­ room detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, super­ market, restaurants and bars. Short term rental avail­ able. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bed­ room apartment, located near los Locos beach, beau­ tifully furnished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The proper­ ty overlooks a superb com­ munal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops.

Short or long term rental

ALARMS

CAR HIRE

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES Unlimited earnings for ambi­ tious people; low cost, money back guaranteed, phone Suzanne on 627 371 731

CARS FOR SALE

ACCOUNTANTS Pro Business Support – for all your accountancy needs in English; bookkeeping, taxes, wage slips and more.

We cater for companies and self­employed people; we can deal with everything for you. Call us on 966 923 963 for first consultation free of charge.

ALARMS 'WATCH YOUR HOME FROM ANYWHERE! CCTV over internet will alert you to intruders, wherever you are in the world. www.imy­ home.es or call 965 076 671(143)

BOATS FOR SALE GC15: 16m Guy Couach motor cruiser, 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, kitchen, lounge/dining area, and fly­ bridge. 2 x Mercedes 350kw diesel motors. 56000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 A57: Rare Vintage 1957 Astondoa Classic Wooden motor launch, 10 m with Perkins diesel engine. All in working order. Needs TLC and re­varnish, great proj­ ect, 6000€. Call 966 923 963 or 651 885 200 .

Evangelical non­denomina­ tional church. Sunday serv­ ices 11am.

Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nation­ alities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Prayer and Praise and Worship Home groups meet during the week. All wel­ come from any church back­ ground or none. For further information contact PilarChristian.CommunityC hurch@gmail.com 968 5754 17 or 966 848 806. Reg No:2009­SG/A The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormons) meet at 10.00 each Sunday at their Torrevieja meetinghouse in the Torreaguas building on the corner of Rambla Juan Mateo Garcia 104, close to the windmill in Torrevieja, 667 533 597.

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

CATERING

BLINDS

Car insurance quotes – new extra discount on fully com­ prehensive policies at the price of third party!

Excellent prices for expats, all policies and call centre staff in English. We will call you back with a quote. 966 923 963

INSURANCE CASER SEGUROS ­ for all your insurance needs, home, car, health, funeral.

Policies available in English and German.

Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from our friendly staff.

PROPERTY FOR RENT

available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 114 This upstairs apart­ ment is situated just out of the town centre on a lovely urbanisation with a good communal pool. It has two bedrooms with an open plan kitchen, diner and lounge and kitchen. €350 per month plus bills. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED! Properties, all types, in the Torrevieja area wanted for long term rentals.

Call us on 96 692 3963 CBR35 : Townhouse with garage, 3 bedrooms, 2 bath­ rooms, communal pool, near San Jaime Hospital in Aguas Nuevas area, 450 € pcm, call 966 923 963 CBR37 : Smart & modern 1 bedroom ground floor apartment with seaviews inc.private gated parking.

Ideal for a retired couple; located in quiet residential area, shops nearby. La Mata, 325 € pcm, call 966 923 963.

CBR38 : Detached villa 5 minutes from San Miguel, 3 Beds, 2 Baths, with garage, 175 m plot, furnished. 500 € pcm, call 966 923 963 .

KGVM1 : Quad house in Villamartin, 4 beds, 2 baths, fireplace, garden & balcony, communal Pool.

Close to all shops, etc. 650 € pcm. Call to us to view on 966 923 963.

CBR36 : Torrevieja town­ centre, 2 bed top floor apartment with all ameni­ ties nearby, communal swimming pool. Private bal­ cony, furnished, ideal for liv­ ing in all year round. 300€ pcm, call 966 923 963 Horse Riding Stables For Rent in Catral: 14,000 m2 land, 10 individual stables and five paddocks. Includes a 3 bedroom house, Long term rent only. 16,800 euro for the year. 966 923 963

CARPENTER

Horse riding Stables for Rent in Algorfa : 3,000 m2, 22 individual stables and 2 paddocks.

Long Term Rental only. 11,200 euro for the year. 966 923 963 CBR21 : Frontline apart­ ment on the ground floor, right on the beach! Consists of 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lovely terrace just off the sandy beach, 400€ pcm, call to view on 966 923 963.

CBR20: Beachfront apart­ ment 4th floor with fantastic sea views! 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, good sized bal­ cony, 400€ pcm, call now on 966 923 963 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bed­ room apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE Home and Contents cover ­ Comprehensive policies for house and contents with CASER Seguros ­ excellent prices for expats; policies available in. Call 966 923 963 for a quote.

RS116 – 3 bedroom, 2 bath­ room towncentre apartment in Los Montesinos, beauti­ fully furnished/decorated, pool on solarium, 85.000€, call 966 923 963 Rare opportunity to pur­ chase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros.

Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing RS80 : Spanish style town­ house in Algorfa, totally reformed and redecorated, 110m2, 3 lrg.bedrooms, 1 bathroom, many extras, absolute bargain at 99,500€, call now on 966 923 963 for no obligation viewing.

Ref: 510, €70,000.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the super­ markets, bars and restau­ rants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking

CLEANERS

43

Friday, November 15, 2013 and faces large oasis com­ munal pool. Walking dis­ tance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ref: 104 Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment, close to Shops, walking distance to Friday Market and Town Centre and the beach. The property is close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Recently refur­ bished apartment in a good central location.

Conveniently situated for all the facilities of this modern vibrant town, and only a few blocks away from Torreviejas excellent sea

front with its abundant cafes, restaurants and shops. Price €43950 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. BRJ1 – 1 bedroom top floor renovated apartment in San Luis. Great sea and lake views. 45.000€. Tel. 966 923 963 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant.

Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods.

Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3

GARDENER

CAR BREAKERS

Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground park­ ing, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views.

Viewings absolutely essen­ tial. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 KBJ3 : 3 bed penthouse in Guardamar, furnished, fan­ tastic sea views, communal pool and parking, 155.000€, call 966 923 963 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool.

Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks pro­ jected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 RS1 : 3 bed large villa in Torrevieja on 950m2 plot, private pool, Jacuzzi / sauna, parking, 289.000€, call 966 923 963 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to

offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off­road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool near­ by. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating, Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 com­ munal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popu­ lar urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Ground Floor Duplex, on the Monte y Mar estate of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Fully furnished, Private Parking, Communal pool Ref. GA0094 NOw only 83.000e Tel. 680333242

Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005.

Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge­Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg.

Tel. 680333242 Ref: KP3100, €183,000.

Three bedroom, two bath­ room detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Corner Plot Property in the lower end of Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Under build, Roof top Solarium Being sold Fully Furnished including White goods. Walking distance to all local amenities. 139.950e Ref. GA0087 Tel. 680333242

MAN AND A VAN

DRAINAGE PETS

44

Friday, November 15, 2013

Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath­ roomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interi­ or furnishings are top quali­ ty, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and grav­ eled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in show­ er units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and

PERSONAL

much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toi­ let and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create anoth­ er room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bed­ room apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed­in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large commu­ nal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Lovely clean detached Villa just as you enter Gran Alacant. Very central loca­ tion, 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Garden Shed, Private Parking, Attractive Gardens, Private pool Ref: K59 240.000e Tel. 627711155

POOLS

SURVEYOR

PLUMBERS

POOL TABLES

Recently reduced 4 Bed, 3 Bath Villa, in Gran Alacant.

Quiet Location, Exceptional Views. Converted Under build, 2 Lounges, 2 Kitchens, Private Garage and being sold Fully Furnished, now only 239.950 Ref: L81 Tel. 680333242 Large 4 Bedroom, 4 Bathroom, 2 Kitchens, 2 Lounges, 600m2+ plot Large Retractable Glazed in Pool for all year swimming, Private Parking for 4 cars, Very low­maintenance, Fully Furnished. 330.000e but Negotiable. Very different to the other properties in Gran Alacant and is disabled friendly Ref: L80 Tel. 680333242

REMOVALS

Gran Alacant Town House with a difference.

2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons.

Greenland Views and all local amenities close by.

Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Limited Edition Fortaleze in Gran Alacant Exceptionally Large Plot. 4 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Private Pool with Decorative Garden, Private Parking, Electric Gates, Glazed in Porch, Solarium, Under build. Quiet sought after area. Very tastefully fur­ nished and all included 370.000e Ref. K52 Tel. 627711155 Gran Alacant, detached villa in desirable road close to all amenities, comprising of 3 double bedrooms, 3 baths, lounge diner with working fire place, brand new kitchen with all appliances and black granite work tops,

STORAGE

private pool, plot of 550m2, established irrigated gar­ dens and fruit trees, private parking, solarium, also there is a converted under build giving more bedrooms ,bathroom & kitchen, this house has many extras and is being sold fully furnished.

Ref.k47. €280,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant south­facing, very private villa, with wood­ land and Alicante views.

Situated at the end of a small cul­de­sac which means this villa enjoys a very peaceful location.3 Bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 3 Bathrooms, lounge­diner with working fireplace, fully fitted kitchen with including white goods, large front porch, solarium,workshop and stor­ age in under build, central heating, air con H/C, ceiling fans, grills, UK T.V, off road parking and plenty of out­ side parking also. Due to its orientation of this property enjoys full sun, all day, something very important in the winter months. Ref.K24. €237,000 Tel 680333242

QUIZZES Experienced quiz­ master/question setter with personality available to host quiz nights in local bars.

Tel:­ 664 838 581

SITUATIONS VACANT

RADIO COSTA INTERNA­ TIONAL needs motivated sellers. Spanish, English and German language is a bonus but not essential.

Training and good earnings guaranteed. For more info call 644 126 600 or email info@radicocostainterna­ tional.com Medaesthetics require a Beautician. Must have NVQ Level 3 and working self employed email cv to sabinebrooks@hotmail.com

SOLICITORS Need English speaking solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your prob­ lems with debt recovery, divorce, property, fraud, criminal defence. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor today

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VAN HIRE

Friday, November 15, 2013

Greenside Gossip

45

IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

CALM LADIES SHOW THE MEN THE WAY

language, and they don’t know how to play at an acceptable pace. So, they must be taught the fundamentals. Having said all that, during a round last week I witnessed of the major causes of slow play, and I took a photo to identify the problem.

To set up the catalogue of errors, the buggies were parked at the front of the green, and that meant that the distance the players had to walk was longer than the length of the green.

The cart path went to the left of the green and was consid­ erably closer to the green and not only would it have been quicker to get to the buggy but was the correct exit and would allow the following golfers to play their shots. Instead they had to wait not only for them to get to the buggy, but the additional time it took them to store their clubs and putters and then to get into the buggy and drive away! When this happens on nearly every hole, is it no wonder that there are five hour­plus rounds?

KNOW YOUR RULES The Ladies are coming to our region this Monday with the Costa Blanca Ladies at the Font del Llop course near Monforte del Cid. It’s part of the Ladies European Tour Access Series (LETAS) and that’s where the next Annike Sorenstam and Laura Davies will come from as well future Solheim Cup stars.

So do go along and see the female stars of the future, and all three days of action are totally free to watch! It is my opin­ ion that we as expat golfers can align ourselves with these ladies more than their male equivalent so they are really worth watching.

I have a theory that women enjoy golf best of all because they see it primarily as a soothing pastime, whereas we men mostly regard it as a test of strength and aggression. The fact is that golf requires more of what are regarded as femi­ nine qualities than almost any other sport that I can think of.

Just look at my reasoning: Golf is a game that requires hands that are “soft” and swings that are smooth. It best responds to gentle rhythms. It is about persuasion rather than power. It better suits the subtle patience of women than the brusque temperament of men.

You will understand, I trust, that I have defined between the sexes. Sometimes it takes us some time to realise that there are better lady golfers than us. Perhaps at times we men are also more stupid than women?

How else can you explain the times we try to blast the ball from the Tee instead of following the ladies example of a relaxed and easy swing?

Why do we take a three iron and end up in the water when

the female species show us that a five iron, a wedge and a putt is a more sensible way to play the hole?

Why do we throw clubs and use expletives and grind our teeth, while the ladies just dismiss disappointment with a shrug of the shoulders?

Why do they look at us piteously when we want to abuse the slow fourball in front or fight the galloping two ball for driving the ball into us?

Why are some lady golfers better than we are? (See Above).

I suppose the problem is getting rid of all those years of male conditioning. The frustrations we men suffer on the golf course are not because we are playing badly but it is more than likely that we are trying to solve the problems by brute strength. Over the years I have heard of various methods to slow and have rhythm in the swing, one of which was using a metronome method allied to a name. For example a slow rhythmic method would use the name of golfing legend Seve Ballesteros and it goes like this: ­ on the back swing SE­VE­ RI­AN with the O at the top of the swing and then starting the descent with BA­LL­ ES when the ball is hit and TE­ROS being the follow through, just like the ladies. But no! For us men it’s K­J­CHOI. So go watch these young ladies and learn from their smooth easy swing and gentle feminine approach to the game.

PACE OF PLAY My column has focussed a lot recently about the pace of play and some of the reasons for it, along with ways of increasing the speed of it, though not by emulating Usain Boult but considering other payers through consideration and etiquette. Simply stated, many golfers are slow. They don’t know or believe they are slow. They are without doubt the primary cause of long rounds. Telling a slow golfer to “pick up the pace” has little or no effect.

Why? Because it is the equivalent of telling someone to speak Spanish that only knows English. They don’t know the

TITTER ON THE TEE A couple got married and went on honeymoon.

When they got into the room the groom said, “Put those trousers on”. When she got them on, he said “Now that’s the first and last time you will wear the trousers in our marriage” She then threw her knickers at him and said Put them on!”

He replied “I can’t get into those”.

To which she replied, “And until you change your atti­ tude you won’t”.

This week I am listing five of the most common ones that you may come across during your round: 1. ARE YOU WORRIED WHEN YOU GET A DROP? You get a FREE drop if your ball is interfered with by an obstruction (like a road) or abnormal ground conditions (like rabbit scrapes or casual water). Check local course rules for exceptions! ­You get a drop with ONE­STROKE penalty if your ball is in a hazard. ­ You get a drop with a TWO­STROKE penalty only if you actually breach a rule.

2. DON’T KNOW EXACTLY WHAT PREFERRED LIES ARE? If, and only if local rules state that preferred lies are in operation, you can LIFT, CLEAN and PLACE your ball within SIX INCHES of its original place, but NO NEARER THE HOLE. This applies to closely mown areas only – so don’t try it in the rough or a bunker.

3. WHICH POST IS WHICH or WHAT DO THE COLOURED POSTS MEAN? YELLOW: Water Hazard.

One­shot penalty – play the ball from where you last played or go back as far as you like along the line the ball went into the water.

RED: Lateral water hazard.

One ­ shot penalty – So called because you can’t drop a ball behind it like a normal water hazard. In that case you drop within two club lengths of: (a) The point where the ball went in or (b) the point on the opposite margin of the hazard equidistant from the hole.

WHITE: Out of Bounds (OB) Play from where you last played you original ball. Play a provisional ball and save time, but make sure you declare it so first (Tell your playing partners). Only when you are sure your first ball is lost or OB, do you play your provisional ball under a stroke and distance penalty.

4. UNPLAYABLE BALL You can declare your ball unplayable anywhere you like, except in a water hazard. When you do, you lose a shot.

YOU CAN PLAY YOUR NEXT: (a) As near as possible to where you played your last. (b) By dropping within two club lengths of where your ball is, but no nearer the hole. (c) By dropping behind where your ball lay, keeping that point between the hole and the spot where you decide to drop. Go back as far as you like.

NOTE: For (b) and (c) in a bunker, you must drop in the bunker 5. MARKING YOUR BALL ON THE GREEN How many Tour Pro’s both sides on the pond have fallen foul of this one? When you mark, place your marker imme­ diately behind the ball. If it interferes with play, stance or stroke of another player, then move it one or more putter head lengths to the side. If you move it like this, line up your putter head with a tree or similar landmark.

46

Friday, November 15, 2013

Barca extend advantage It’s that man…..yet again!

REAL BETIS 1 BARCELONA 4

Barcelona increased their lead at the top of the Primera Division table to three points by overcoming struggling Real Betis, but it came at a price, with Lionel Messi suffering a first half hamstring injury. Despite the final score­ line, it was tough going for Gerardo Martino's side, who were under pressure from their hosts in the first half, until Neymar broke the deadlock on 35 minutes. Less than two min­ utes later, Pedro (pictured) doubled the lead to put Barca's minds at ease, and Fabregas rounded off the victory in the second half by netting a brace. Jorge Molina scored a penal­ ty in injury­time but it was scant consolation for Pepe Mel's side, who stay bottom of the league. Barcelona meanwhile have won 13 out of their 14 league matches.

BOAKYE BAGS IT GETAFE 1 ELCHE 1

REAL MADRID 5 SOCIEDAD 1 Cristiano Ronaldo notched his second succes­ sive hat­trick at the Bernabeu as Real Madrid thrashed Real Sociedad 5­ 1. Ronaldo struck three in the 7­3 victory over Sevilla last week and the Portugal superstar repeated the feat against Sociedad with strikes in the 12th, 27th and 76th minutes to take his league tally to 16 for the campaign. The 28­year­old also set up Madrid's second for Karim Benzema in the 18th minute while Gareth Bale's pass helped Sami Khedira make it 4­0 in the 36th minute.

The attacking trident of Ronaldo, Benzema and Bale, who cost a combined total of around £200million, have now notched 16 of the 17 goals Madrid have

scored in their last four matches ­ the other being Khedira's strike ­ while they also boast a host of assists between them. However, while their strikeforce have been in stunning form, their defence was breached yet again as Sociedad pulled a 61st­minute goal back

through Antoine Griezmann.

Carlo Ancelotti's men have only kept three clean sheets in 17 competitive matches this season, and remain 6 points behind the leaders Barcelona, and 3 points behind their city rivals, Atletico.

SO NEAR FOR TORRY FC TORREVIEJA 1 ELDENSE 1

After the disappointment of their last minute home defeat to Villarreal, Elche bounced back to take an excellent away point from their Sunday visit to Getafe. It was only Elche’s 2nd point from their last four games, and it came courtesy of a 2nd half strike from Richmond Boakye. It was the least that Elche deserved as they carved out a number of opportunities only to find the Getafe keeper Moya in top form.

The home side started well and Pedro Leon came close to opening the scoring as his corner ball from the right found the centre of the Elche goal before goalkeeper Manu managed to clear. And minutes later, Elche could have taken the lead. Javi Marquez Moreno took a free­kick ­ after Lisandro Lopez fouled Boakye ­ but his effort from 35 yards out was safely collected by Getafe stopper Moya. Damian Suarez (pictured) was next to have a go for Elche as they began to dominate, but his shot from the right of the 18­yard box was tipped round the post by Moya. Elche were on target again after 15 minutes and Moya was tested once

more, this time by Carles Gil de Pareja as the Azulones keeper caught his long­range effort from the left channel.

But against the run of play, Getafe took the lead three minutes later. Diego Castro crossed in a fine ball from the right which found the feet of Pedro Leon, who was just outside the penalty box and fired home with his left foot to make it 1­0. Elche tried to get a goal back and came close through Gil, who fired a close­range effort towards the Getafe goal but Moya denied them again.

Getafe had early chances in the 2nd half before Elche got a deserved equaliser.

Aaron Niguez provided a cross from the left wing and picked out Boakye in the penalty box, who made no mistake as he headed home from close range just after the hour mark. The away side pressed on for a sec­ ond and Niguez was unlucky not to double their score five minutes later but Moya man­ aged to tip the ball over the crossbar to safe­ ty. Elche lie in 13th place in the table, and have a break until Sunday November 24th when they entertain Valencia.

SAINTS MARCH ON CATRAL 0

SAN FULGENCIO 2

San Fulgencio produced perhaps their best performance of the season to win away at Catral who had been unbeaten in the cur­ rent campaign. San Fulgencio made the early running with Bernie creating problems from a cross, and then shortly hitting the post after being set up with some good play from Aitor and Ismael. Surprisingly it was score­ less at half­time, with Catral unable to really

get going. After a slow start to the 2nd half, an Aitor strike gave San Fulgencio the lead, though the Saints only sealed up matters towards the very end with a 2nd goal from Aitor with just a minute remaining. The result consolidates San Fulgencio’s 2nd placing in the First Regional group table, and they entertain Monteforte tomorrow afternoon (Saturday) with a 4.30pm kick­off.

FC Torrevieja were just 7 minutes away from defeating the unbeaten runaway lead­ ers Eldense at the Vicente Garcia stadium on Sunday, but for Aridane rescuing a point for the visitors from a corner.

Torrevieja started brightly against a side that had an excellent defensive record, and Pastor should have done better with an early opportunity. Torry clearly missed the suspended Carrasco to give them that extra attacking bite, with both defences cancelling each other out. The home side though got the breakthrough in the 38th minute, with an excellent long ball from Rafa setting up Alberto(pictured celebrating) to score with a

controlled low shot that beat the Eldense keeper Alberto Macia. And it should have been 2­nil for Torry at half­time, as Micro produced a good save from the keeper, though his effort should have been more telling.

The second half didn’t produce a rash of chances, as once again both defensives held firm, though if anything there was more of a defensive mentality from the home side.

Once Eldense got their late equaliser, both sides upped their gears to search for a win­ ner that didn’t come in a tense finish.

Torrevieja travel to Ribarroja this Sunday for a lunchtime kick off at noon.

Orihuela back on song LORCA 5

Orihuela bounced back after their home defeat to Albacete to get their season back on track away to Lorca.

It was an even first half with Orihuela leading 11­5 at the interval, with their captain Victor, going over for a crucial try. Orihuela stepped on the gas in the 2nd half with tries from Samoano, Richi, and Ivan, to get a hard fought win with a scoreline line that didn’t fully reflect the hard efforts of the home side.

In the weekend’s other Murcia federation results, the Torrevieja Tigers were thrashed 69­3 at the Nelson Mandela Stadium by Cartagena, whilst Albacete had a tight 7­5 win at Murcia.

ITV ORIHUELA 26

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Friday, November 15, 2013

THE FINAL WORD

It’s getting out of hand.

What is? Why, the inquest on referees’ decisions, put­ ting every possible discus­ sion point under the micro­ scope of 100 TV cameras from every angle possible ­ usually to show the world the poor ref got it wrong.

And what hap­ pens as a result?

Zilch, n a d a , beggar all. So ­ why is it done? We – ell, it all makes for good TV, doesn’t i t ?

Provides the past­it pundits with possibilities to pointless­ ly pad out the program and pontificate on the rights and wrongs of it all.

So let’s put it right, shall we? And while we’re at it, there’s a few other things we could sort out at the same time – like the pointless protests and haranguing of officials, some of it so vehement a tazer should be used on the perpetra­ tors.

And when did you last see a

referee change his mind?

They don’t, ever, and they’re never going to ­ so why try?

Secondly: swearing. Yes, I know in life it goes on ­ I can go a bit myself when I hit my thumb with the hammer. But footballers have a responsi­ bility to the public, and the further up the pecking order they get, the more their ugly, vile obscenities are seen by both the crowd and of course, we mil­ lions who avidly watch the goggle box.

Spitting/snotting – together fit­

tingly filed under ‘Filth’. Tiger Woods is rightly under pres­ sure to pack the first one up on the world’s top golf cours­ es, but we see it all the time in football. Even worse in my book is the disgusting ges­ ture of applying a finger to one nostril to eject mucous from the other, all, always, of course in everyone’s full view: charming – I don’t think.

To me, these ‘misde­ meanours’ could all be sorted out with a few bold moves by the powers­that­be who run football. Some I admit I’ve cribbed from the gentlemen’s game played by hooligans – rugby, where officials’ deci­ sions are never questioned on the field ­ it’s inbred in every boy (or girl) the moment they step onto a rugby field. So here’s how:­ 1. A fourth eye, well off the field observes play via a TV monitor: this is watched by a

fourth (fifth?) referee/official who can immediately be con­ sulted by the match referee by radio over difficult deci­ sions where another look is needed. The extra man is sit­ ting in a ‘cooler’ temperature, somewhere neutral and unpressurized, and definitely not near the field. The opin­ ion, rather than a decision is quickly channelled back by radio to the referee who then has the power to decide action. It would take no more time than treating the aver­ age injury, half of which are bogus anyway: anyone attempting to influence a ref­ eree’s decision in any way is instantly booked (see below for punishment).

2. The referee’s eventual decision instantly becomes absolute law: no surround­ ing, no hounding, no push­ ing, no jostling, no backchat, no moaning ­ everything eas­ ily and instantly punishable

by yellow card booking and if it continues, red card and straight off.

3. All punishments instant­ ly become more severe: bookings, automatic next match ban; sendings­off, automatic next three match­ es ban.

4. Possibly an appeal sys­ tem, but where if the original decision is upheld, the ban is longer for wasting people’s time.

Summary: the above new laws, applicable to everyone would rapidly be seen as fair, as they would affect every­ body. The worst offending clubs would soon lose their chief culprits to bans, which would hurt both the offending players and the clubs: per­ fect!

Final word: Brian Clough’s (successful) teams never took officials on – or he’d have had them out – so it can be done! I rest my case.

Marc on the Mark Ref does impression of Mr.Magoo CD MONTESINOS 1 CD MURADA 1 Injury time woe continued to pile on the home agony for a CD Montesinos side that seems cursed not to win at home after a string of fine away performances and results. In this particular case they can view themselves as somewhat unlucky, thanks to a referee that appeared to be in need of an urgent visit to an optician.

Murada made the brighter start to the match with a number of telling crosses test­ ing the Monte defence, whilst at the other side of the field, there were only long range shots to test the visitor’s keeper. Monte’s coach Juanpe wasn’t exactly delirious with what was going on, and rallied the team to be more attacking. Dario soon netted only to be given offside, but then the referee’s parentage was strongly brought into ques­ tion by the howling home fans when Rodrigo “scored” just 3 minutes later, only for the goal to be deemed offside, which it clearly was not. The match official, who perhaps had a rather generous Menu del Dia earlier on, seemed oblivious to some of the Murada tough tackling, whilst miraculously regaining his sight for any potential Monte offences.

The home side though should have taken the lead before the interval, with Vaz laying on the ball for Marcos with a fine cut back from the dead ball line, but who shot over.

Montesinos went up a gear in the 2nd half

Spain’s Marc Marquez was the toast of the country on Sunday as he became the youngest ever MotoGP champion as a third­ place finish at the season­ending Valencia Grand Prix secured him the 2013 world title in his rookie year. Jorge Lorenzo won the race but Marquez, 20, only had to finish fourth to become the first debut­season title­ winner since American Kenny Roberts in 1978. Dani Pedrosa was second, but only Lorenzo could deny Marquez.

"This is a dream that comes true," he said.

"I cannot explain what I feel." The result meant Marquez finished just four points ahead of Lorenzo in the standings, the smallest points margin since 1992.

Confirmation of the title win for Marquez sparked wild celebrations throughout the 104,000­strong crowd as the young Spanish rider wrote his name into the history books.

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with a string of chances before Vazquinho broke the deadlock after a good through ball from Rodrigo. But the pressure got higher for Monte, after Dimitry was sent off for a 2nd yellow card on the back of a petty challenge, though it looked like the home voodoo was Lightnings going to be broken. The referee added on 8 #48 Nick Kelly BMW 300 Series 2L minutes of injury time, and his Mr.Magoo­like #8 Dave ‘Belchi’ Belcher BMW 300 Series 2L visionary problems came to the fore when he failed to spot a deliberate obstruction in the The unmissable action will begin at 7pm and finish around 9pm with the gates opening at dying moments of the match, which allowed 6pm.

Murada to pounce and score.

For directions to the Cartagena Oval, please visit www.velocityracing.eu It’s local derby time this Sunday as CD It’s gonna be good!

Montesinos play Todo Deporte Montesinos.

Friday, November 15, 2013

48

CHILE CON KRAUT! England’s two course special

On the menu tonight is seriously ‘senior’ soccer as Rio­bound England get the taste of South America with Chile, followed by the main course against arguably our greatest football opponents Germany on Tuesday evening, with both matches live on ITV. Now that England (all Celts excepted,*see quiz below) have qualified for Brazil ‘we’ can re­ adopt a superior attitude, sneer­ ingly looking down our noses at our non­qualifying neighbours, and also sniggering about some sound soccer nations who didn’t directly qualify (like we did…) and are cur­ rently sweating and squirming in the play­offs. Try France (mais oui!) v Ukraine (we beat them), Portugal (wot, no Ronaldo?) v Sweden (no Ibrahimovic either?), Greece (bailed­out?) v Romania (don’t let ‘em in!) and Iceland (? – cool) v Croatia (even Scotland stuffed them...). For once the heat’s off in cold and rainy England, so let’s rub our hands together gleefully and relish the road to Rio. T’management – I like Roy Hodgson, he’s English through and through (no Svens, Fabios at last…). This hefe’s had huge club and international experience ­

John McGregor reports

and he demonstrates it perfectly. The Andros Townsend no­fear factor shows the man has balls, and he is supported manfully by Ray Lewington and Gary Neville, both big Brits.

The Young Lions: today we’re not reliant on the aged stagers ­ the Defoes, the Ferdinands, the Terrys, and maybe even the Lampards: the Dad’s Army who have served England well, but whose stars are slowly fading in the west. Now we have thrusting youngsters replac­ ing ‘em ­ exciting newbies like Andros Townsend, Ross Barkley, and Jack Wilshere, and Leighton Baines.

To provide big­brotherly care for our English young­ sters we have polished, experienced Premier League defenders like Gary Cahill and Phil Jagielka, and where Kyle Walker looks to have made the right back spot his own. As exciting a prospect as Baines is at left back, he has yet to oust the superb Ashley Cole who never lets anyone down: this back four are backed up by sound play­anywhere­well Man United utility men like Chris Smalling and Phil Jones.

Our senior strutters are upfront and in midfield – and here we have the right blend of experience and maturi­ ty in Wayne Rooney, currently scoring ‘em, making ‘em, marking ‘em, and who has suddenly been reborn post­Fergie at Moyes’ Man Utd, having shed that ancient arsey aggro. Liverpool graciously provide icon and captain­fantastic Steven Gerrard, this World Cup

could just could be Stevie’s swansong.

Joe Hart – Man City may be meandering about their man in the maelstrom of the Premiership, (their dodgy defence doesn’t help!), but internationally Joe is all heart and deserves his place. Against Poland he was perfect when England expected and needed him to be.

By picking him this weekend it will (re) charge Joe’s confidence crucially.

Goalscorers? To reinforce the Rooney reincarnation England have swift, superb strikers like Danny Welbeck and Daniel Sturridge – and the scouse Saint of the season, Southampton’s Ricky Lambert. Rick’s bringing his team­mates Adam Lallana and Jay Rodriguez along to Wembley this time, plus Liverpool’s Jordan Henderson, more young blood reaching for Rio. Both Chile and Germany (of course) will be there in Brazil, and it looks like Gerrard, Walker, Welbeck and Carrick are all out injured: so this week­ end will the Saints go marching in? *Are you a true Celt quiz: Question ­ when England are playing (at anything), do you want: a) England to win; b) a draw; c) the opposition (whoever) to win.

Answers a) Liar! (or you’re not a true Celt) b) ??? (toss­ er) c) Gud man Jimmy/Boyo/Paddy ­ you’re a true Celt – but sorry, we won’t see you in Rio, it’s only for class teams.

ENGLAND!