The Courier Week 20

Edition 20

www.thecourier.es

Friday, July 8, 2011

RIP-OFF!

COMPARE THE MARKET DOT CON

UK newspapers facing boycott after price hike

THE latest hike in the price of UK newspapers could spark a full-blown boycott of the British press by expats.

PETER WATKINS: Rarely buys a paper

On average, an English daily paper costs three to four times as much here in Spain as it does in a British high street.

And with some retailers receiving just five per cent of the cover price, more and more people are asking: ‘Where does all the money go?’

Retired Fleet Street journalist Peter Watkins, who now lives in Cabo Roig, buys an English daily paper only when it’s essential. The former Daily

DONNA GEE reports Mirror and People sub-editor told me: ‘‘The pages are sent to Spain electronically, so why the prices are hiked up, I don't know. ‘’What I find particularly annoying is that there are never any inserts. In the UK they can pay 50p or so for the Sun in the week and maybe 60p at weekends. But you get TV mags plus other 'freebies'. The Mail is constantly giving away CDs but you never see them here. ‘’I believe the Mail is the only paper which gives Spanish

times for TV listings, but I wouldn't pay €2.20 for the Sun or Mirror. ‘‘I don't know any of my friends out here who buy a paper, either. It’s such a rip-off.’’

The moguls of Wapping and Canary Wharf argue that it is not commercially viable to sell their publications more cheaply.

Yet justifying such extortionate prices for newspapers that are printed in Spain is difficult.

The Sun, Mirror, Star and Express all increased their prices last Friday by between 10 and 30 cents – and the News of the World, Star on Sunday and

Cont’d on Page 2

THE COSTA LOT...

The Sun Daily Mirror Daily Star Daily Mail Daily Express News of the World Mail on Sunday

€2.20 €2.20 €2.0€ €2.20 €2.10 €2.50 €3.30

PRICE IN THE UK The Sun Daily Mirror Daily Star Daily Mail Daily Express News of the World Mail on Sunday

60p 65p 55p 80p 70p £1.00 £1.50

FULL COMPARISON - P2

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Friday, July 8, 2011

What’s a nice sky like you doing in a dive like this?

TELEPHONE

96 672 6437 JUNGLE DRUMS E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Alto del Moncayo s/n, Guardamar del Segura, 03140, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 672 64 37 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 96 672 6437 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 96 672 6437 616 332 178 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Vanessa Gran Alacant, La Marina, Guardamar Tel. 638 741 847 Denise La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 679 098 309 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Writers Malcolm Palmer Mick Hardy Donna Gee Suzanne Manners Sally Bengtsson Harry Nuttall Harold Heys Phil Smith Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe Dan Smith Photographer Mark Welton

Picture of the week

96 672 7334

THE PRICE IS WRONG from Page One Sunday Mirror followed suit over the weekend.

Years ago, the high prices were understandable because the papers had to be flown in from the UK and took 24 hours to reach the Spanish news stands. But with the advent of satellite printing, expats are mystified that distribution costs should be so high.

Larger retailers receive 15% of the retail price, but for Mary Malone of Thomas Green in El Raso, selling a copy of The Sun or Daily Mirror is

Expat fury over newspaper hike

worth a paltry 10 cents. Or did until Friday’s price rise.

Now her two daily trips to Torrevieja to collect the papers and take back the returns will be worth an extra cent per copy. ‘‘The exorbitant prices don’t seem to bother holidaymakers,’’ she says.

‘After all, they are only here for a week or two. But the expats are more cynical. Some just won’t buy

them at all, whist others just buy them from time to time. ‘‘Maybe the solution would be for nobody to buy them. Then the publishers would be forced to reduce the prices.’’

So what is the explanation? An expat former technician at News International told me: ‘‘When I worked for The Sun, the price on the street was 20p BUT it cost £2.50 to

produce. ‘‘They made their money with the advertising. Seeing as they have no Spanish ads I can only assume that the only way they can make it commercially viable is to sting us full price.’’

Trinity Mirror, publishers of the Daily and Sunday Mirror, failed to respond to our request for an explanation of the lopsided price structure.

COUNTING THE COSTA...

SPAIN

Affiliations

Publication Published by Rainbow Media, S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A - 132 - 2011 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features.

Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non-appearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re-publication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

DAILY NEWSPAPERS The Sun €2.20 Daily Mirror €2.20 Daily Star €2.00 Daily Mail €2.20 Daily Express €2.10 Daily Telegraph €3.20 The Times €3.25 Independent €3.00 OR JUST SAVE SUNDAYS News of the World €2.50 YOUR MONEY Mail on Sunday €3.30 AND PICK UP Sunday Express €2.90 THE COURIER Sunday People €2.30 FOR FREE Sunday Mirror €2.30 Sunday Times €5.00 Research by Sunday Telegraph €5.20 CHARLIE SIMPSON

Monday Mostly Sunny High Temperature: 27°C RealFeel: 29°C

UNITED KINGDOM DAILY NEWSPAPERS The Sun 60p Daily Mirror 65p Daily Star 55p Daily Mail 80p Daily Express 70p Daily Telegraph £1.00 The Times £1.00 The Independent £1.20 SUNDAYS News of the World £1.00 Mail on Sunday £1.50 Sunday Express £1.45 Sunday People 90p Sunday Mirror £1.00 Sunday Times £2.20 Sunday Telegraph £2.00 Today Sunny and nice High Temperature: 31°C RealFeel: 33°C

Saturday Sunny few clouds High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 32°C

Sunday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 33°C

Tuesday Chance of thunder High Temperature: 30°C RealFeel: 34°C

Wednesday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 29°C

Thursday Sunny High Temperature: 27°C RealFeel: 27°C

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Friday, July 8, 2011

IT SHOULDN’T HAPPEN TO A PET

(And it won’t after this year when Britain eases blood-test entry rules) DOG and cat owners will find it cheaper and easier to travel to the UK with their pets when new rules are introduced at the start of next year.

Britain will harmonise its pet movement rules with the rest of the European Union from January 1, 2012, bringing the UK’s Pet Travel Scheme into line with the most recent science.

The UK will maintain its high level of protection against animal diseases after the changes, which have the potential to save pet owners around £7million in fees.

Forcing pets to spend six months in quarantine, a practice dating from the 1800s, is no longer necessary because of vastly improved rabies vaccines and treatments.

All pets will still need to be vaccinated against rabies but those from the EU will no longer need a blood test and will only have to wait 21 days before they travel.

The changes will ensure the risk of rabies coming to the UK remains extremely low. It’s estimated that the new rules mean there would be one case of rabies in a pet in the UK once every 211 years, with the possibility of a person dying from rabies obtained from a pet once in every 21,000 years.

The Health Protection Agency considers Spain a ‘no risk’ country for rabies.

Environment Secretary Caroline Spelman, said: “The UK’s quarantine system was designed to combat the threat

of rabies in the 19th century and has now been left far behind by scientific advances. ‘‘What is needed is a simpler, evidence-based system for protecting the UK from rabies which recognises the actual risk to pets and pet owners. ‘‘The EU’s pet movement scheme has been working very well for nearly a decade, and it makes sense for us to have similar rules.”

Chief Medical Officer, Professor Dame Sally Davies, said: “Rabies is a very serious human disease and the rabies-free status of the UK must be protected. The EU pet travel rules have been successful in preventing any cases of rabies occurring in legally moved pets since the scheme started, so harmonising the UK’s rules with those of the EU will make it easier for those who wish to travel with their pets.’’

The UK will continue to protect the public against the risk of serious exotic tapeworm infections and is pressing to retain tapeworm controls for pets entering the country. The government has been discussing with the European Commission the most appropriate form of tapeworm controls for dogs, to ensure the UK continues to be protected from Echinococcus multilocularis.

The Commission has recently indicated that its proposals, expected shortly, would enable the UK and other tapeworm-free countries to retain tapeworm controls, with a requirement that animals be treated between one and five days before returning to the UK. Dog tapeworm is common in southern Spain.

Tick treatment for pet animals returning to the UK will no longer be required. All pet owners travelling abroad with their animals should discuss with their vets the use of treatments, including those designed to control ticks as part of good animal health practice.

Detailed information on what pet owners and vets need to do before bringing a pet to the UK can be found on the DEFRA website or obtained from the UK helpline +44 (0)870 241 1710.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

ALL GREEK TO ME

WE'VE all seen the distressing sights in Athens over the past fortnight as thousands of people demonstrated against the most draconian, tight-beltening measures which are having to be brought in to save Greece (and the rest of Europe) from the financial mire.

Their venom was aimed against the Greek parliament and was partly justified because for years the government has not taken the

TONY MAYES takes a look at the struggling economies in Europe

action needed to rein back spending and ensures the country is living within its means.

But the real villains are the super rich Greeks who have been treating their homeland with contempt for years.

There is a suburb outside Athens occupied by the super rich behind their gated communities.

An appropriate sentence may bring the many others to declare their millions and help struggling countries.

They may think it amusing that they have the know-how to escape tax, making the pain felt by the average person in the street much worse than it would otherwise be.

No-one is too rich or powerful that they can escape the law and governments should not shrink away from pursuing and jailing them.

Talking about the rich and powerful takes me conveniently on to the dreadful actions taken against the former head of the International Monetary Fund, Dominique Strauss-Kahn.

Luxury Their million-euro plus homes boast lavish swimming pools and every luxury, yet the majority of their owners declare taxable income of a mere ÂŁ10,000 or so.

Their wealth is carefully tucked away in the numerous tax havens around the world, thus depriving the Greek government the vital money it need to pay its debts.

There's no doubt that if the super rich had done the right thing, Greece would not be in the mess it is today.

The Greek government decided to introduce a swim-

Crazy ming pool tax to try to exact some vital income from the wealthy. And what did these unpatriotic b$==***s do?

Bought camouflage netting to cover their pools so they could not be detected by the government hired helicopters.

Yet it's not just Greece where the super rich are evading their civic duties. It's happening all around the world, and somehow governments worldwide have to take the necessary action to put an end to it.

We were in Portugal a few weeks ago and found it amusing and irritating that time after time we went to shops and were told that their credit card machine was out of order, or that there was a bad connection.

The excuse for the nonworking of credit card machines was ever more creative, even at garages.

The result was that we had to pay cash for almost everything - diesel, food, meals at

restaurants and items we bought in shops.

We knew full well that they were not really trying to evade the costs of accepting credit cards, what they really wanted was cash in hand so that the transaction did not have to go through the books. In other words they were evading paying the 22 per cent TVA (VAT).

Not fiddling by the super rich this, but fiddling by the general population and another cause of the country not getting the tax revenue it needs to pay its way.

Excessive We all hate the excessive spending and waste which seems synonymous with governments all around the world, but that's another story.

Perhaps we need a new world order where we do away with money, and every transaction is done by a financial card. In that way it's a recorded transaction and

tax could be automatically imposed on it.

But importantly, we need to end tax havens and banks within them should be "nationalised" by a world bank and their transactions made transparent. That way money of the super rich could not be hidden.

And just as importantly, there should be some highprofile prosecutions against tax evaders. Perhaps they should be charged with treason, as their actions are such that they are inflicting huge damage to the country where they should be paying tax.

He was utterly humiliated and dragged to court in handcuffs after a complaint from a hotel maid who, it has subsequently been discovered, appears to be a serial liar and has links to drug dealing and money laundering.

I have often thought that the American legal system is crazy and that the police, prosecutors and defence lawyers act with utter childishness, more concerned with their TV appearances than the administration of justice.

Cont’d on Page 5

Friday, July 8, 2011

Frying high AIRLINE COOKS UP NEW MIX FOR PASSENGERS TO SPAIN

By SALLY BENGTSSON

AS the travel industry tries to reduce its carbon footprint, one airline is chipping in with an unusual new fuel.

Thomson Airways is set to become Britain's first airline to use biofuel when it launches a service to Spain next month - powered by that kitchencupboard staple COOKING OIL! The used oil will be given a new lease of life from July 28, fuelling flights between Birmingham and Palma in Mallorca just as soon as final safety clearance is received.

Flights will operate on a 50/50 blend of Jet A1 fuel and hydroprocessed esters and fatty acids (HEFA) fuel – made from used cooking oil.

Weekly flights to Spain using biofuel will begin in September for a year, on the same route initially, and switching to BirminghamAlicante during the winter schedule.

Dutch airline KLM operated the world's first scheduled biokerosene-powered flight on Wednesday after one of its Boeing 737800 jets flew 171 passengers between Amsterdam and Paris, using the same cooking oil-Jet-A mix that Thomson plans to utilise.

KLM, which merged with Air France in 2004, operated a one-off passenger flight using biofuels in 2009 - the world's first - and plans to launch scheduled biokerosenefuelled services between Holland and France in September.

Thomson managing director Chris Browne said: ‘‘As sustainable biofuels become more commercially viable, Thomson Airways plans to expand their use across its fleet over the next three years.’’

European airlines, biofuel producers and the EU Commission last week signed up to produce 2 million tonnes of biofuel for aviation by 2020.

It’s all Greeek to me...

From Page 4

It has always bewildered me why we ever gave America its independence; they have shown time and time again they were and still are not ready to take on the responsibility of self-determination!

We probably will never know what went on in that hotel room, whether it was a honey trap, or whether there was a sexual attack.

What I find hard to believe is that a man who could afford to buy hundreds of high class prostitutes only too willing to pro-

vide sex for money, would want to risk his political future with an unwilling chamber maid. I find it so distressing that someone can be ruined in this way by police before they have properly investigated the background of the person making the allegation.

I am not saying that anyone regardless of their background should not have any rape allegation taken seriously, but this whole sorry tale does women no favours whatsoever, because again it casts doubt when the word rape is shouted against a man.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

‘What the hell are queue-rops?’ someone demanded – Part 1 WE were talking in our bar on the Paseo Maritimo when I said I was writing some articles on queuerops (writes SPIKE).

“What the hell are queue-rops?” someone demanded.

“Ah!” But, within a minute or two they’d all acknowledged that they’d seen newspaper ads and articles in the English weeklies about QROPS (which are pronounced queuerops). Except no one had taken much notice because they’d thought that QROPS were something to do with really heavy finance: moving big money around, making tricky decisions about investing and that kind of stuff.

There have been so many different ads and newspaper articles, so many different claims, that confusion has become inevitable.

“Queue-rops are just the best possible news for everyone who has come to live in Spain and has left money tied up in a pension fund in UK,” I said. “That’s what queue-rops are about. It’s all good.”

Most of the group looked surprised.

None of us are exactly hard-up … yet. But none of us have the sort of disposable income we’d hoped for in our retirement to Spain for a sunshine life.

In fact, for some of us (like my friend George) finances

were getting very worrying.

The really annoying thing, George often said, was that all his working life he’d been paying into his firm’s pension fund, but because he hadn’t been old enough to cash the pension in without heavy penalties, he’d had to leave a real packet of money in Britain.

And not helping the picture for his future finances, he was still having to pay ongoing fees every year in pension-fund service charges automatically deducted from his pension account as well as the investment was linked to the stock market, so where his pension fund had been worth £42,000 three years ago, it was only worth £37,400 this year! Three years on, it would possibly be worth even less!

And with some time still to go until he was 65, his final FROM THE LONDON EVENING STANDARD READER'S Digest magazine has fallen into administration today after it failed to secure backing for a deal to fund its pension scheme.

The title's American parent group - Reader's Digest Association - said it was no longer able to give its support following the UK Pensions Regulator's decision not to approve plans to fund the pension scheme, which has a £125 million shortfall.

pension pay-out might hardly be enough to make up for what rising costs were doing to the savings he’d brought out from Britain. (And I’d also had to say at one time that pension funds were collapsing in Britain’s worsening economic crisis … many people’s hoped-for big pay-day had gone! Just look at the Teachers out on strike this week) “What I’ve found out is that a queue-rops to suit your case will be exactly what you need, George!”

“Like how?” he asked.

“Well, for a start, you get your pension out of Britain and stop paying the service charges.”

Just then, Pedro, the bar owner, came up.

“Señor Juan,” he said to me, a bit urgently, “¡creo que la policía va a remolcar su coche lejos!” (I think the police are going to tow your car away!)

“Oh ****,” I said, heading for the door.

On my way out I said I’d tell them the rest next week … it really was worth listening to.

“But if you reckon you’d like to talk to someone without waiting for me, then please contact Jerry Firth on 600680549 or send an e-mail to jerry.firth@amassspain.com.

“They’ve set-up really good-news QROPS arrangements for hundreds of people.”

DUTCH TOURIST SURVIVES What every man thinks 18 DAYS DOWN RAVINE about apart from sex?

IN a story which beggars belief, MaryAnne Goossens, a Dutch tourist, was recovered on Wednesday by a Civil Guard mountain rescue team after spending 18 days at the bottom of a ravine in a remote area of the Málaga province.

Goossens, aged 48, had had no food and lived purely on water, for the duration of her ordeal. "She thought about eating ants but couldn't bring herself to do it," said Bernadette Veeger, a Dutch doctor resident in the region who was one of the first people to speak to Goossens. Having been

IT turns out absolutely nothing, at least according to ‘author’ Sheridan Simove.

He Oxford University graduate has just compiled a 200-page book on the topic in which every page is blank.

Within days of being released, the blank book became an instant worldwide hit, and sold out on Amazon following heavy promotion in student unions across Britain.

Now, the book has been introduced to Spain as a novelty gift.

Speaking at Madrid Book found by hikers and taken to hospital, she Fair, Simove, 39, joked: was said to be "stable, conscious and talk- “This book is the result of 39 years of painstaking ing."

"She is tired and hungry; her son is going research and practical to take a plane as soon as he is able to study into the subject.

“After many years of come and see her," a spokesman for the Goossens family said. Goossens had hard work I finally realised checked into a hotel in Nerja on June 16. that men think of absoluteOn June 22, her ex-husband and a son ly nothing apart from sex.

“It was a shocking conarrived in Málaga to report her missing.

They had spent the following few days clusion and I realised that searching for her, but had almost given up the world needed to be hope of finding her alive. informed of my findings.”

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Friday, July 8, 2011

THERE’S NOWT SO QUEER AS SMOKE

I HAVE two pet hates in life, as everyone who knows me is aware. I hate onions and I can’t stand inconsiderate smokers.

In fact, my worst nightmare is the thought of being accosted by someone smoking an onion.

Take it from me...cos I know my onions (ugh!) taurant.

No more scouring tables before sitting down for giveaway ciggy packets – always a sure sign that you’d be choking within a few minutes.

I wish the obnoxious things had never been put on this earth – or left under it to be more accurate.

Apart from the runny-eye aspect, raw onions are obscenely pungent. And as for the taste…better move on before I’m sick. Literally.

The thing is, it’s relatively easy to avoid the smell of onions – unless someone rams one in your face, of course. No such luck with the cancer-stick brigade, though.

But of course, we knew that come summer, it would be déjà vu and back to the days when I stopped eating out in the UK. Now, once again, smokers are free to put al fresco diners in a Catch 22 situation (i.e. ‘be a passive pal and help me smoke my cigarette - or take your clear air somewhere else’).

Distinct Maybe it’s their way of fighting back at those who cast them out into the winter cold. But I’m getting the distinct aroma of déjà vu this summer.

Back in England a few years ago, I used to rail about inconsiderate smokers (which was just about all of them) lighting up on the next table as I was about to tuck into my juicy steak.

I dared not complain because they were perfectly entitled to pollute my clothes and lungs and ruin my evening. So I stopped going to restaurants.

Come July 1, 2007, I was in heaven. Smoking was banned in public places and I could at last dine out in

the knowledge that any sick saddie who couldn’t do without a roll-up for the time it takes to eat three courses had no option but to leave the room. And the building.

However, when I moved to Spain, it was back to square one. Square zero, even because smoking is to the Spanish what beer, tattoos and pot bellies are to British holidaymakers.

Which is one of the reasons I wrote a piece just before the January smoking ban predicting that while

expats would abide by the rules, the natives would find a way round it because it was part of their culture.

I had the impression that smoking 50 Señor Service Extra Pungent a day was compulsory for every Spaniard over the age of 16 – particularly the girls.

I also thought it was a miracle the country isn’t permanently shrouded in smog.

My belief the ban would not work was based on the fact that whilst British smokers are used to being perse-

cuted, the idea of not lighting up, particularly in their favourite bar, is to the average Spaniard unthinkable.

Which is why I’m astounded the Madrid government’s legislation seems to be working in these parts.

Of course, the January embargo came as a godsend to anti-smoking fanatics like myself.

At last we were in a little England where smokers would shiver outside while the clean-living dined unmolested in our favourite res-

Unless I choose to bake inside a sweltering restaurant and miss out on the joys of outdoor dining, the Choker Jokers are going to get me.

OK, I know most eateries have air conditioning, but who wants to sit indoors on a glorious summer’s evening?

Last week, I dined with friends in the pretty setting of La Herradura restaurant in Los Montesinos.

Inside, no smoking of course - and no diners either. It was far too hot.

Outside, it was choc-a-bloc with dozens of tables, cove-

red with pristine white tablecloths, arranged close together to accommodate as many diners as possible.

The whole scenario was a non-smoker’s nightmare with the message to the nicotine brigade, ‘light up when you like’, regardless of that woman about to consume her carpaccio of prawns starter two feet away.

Drizzled Now I know that smoking in the open air is perfectly legal. But do restaurateurs not realise that most of their customers DO NOT enjoy their steaks drizzled with tobacco-smoke sauce?

Surely it’s the simplest thing to set up separate smoking and non-smoking areas, just as I remember in the days before the legislators first moved in.

The only difference is that they need to do it OUTDOORS. It really is déjà vu. And it’s happening all over again.

Hyp, hyp hooray - how I beat the habit OK, I confess. I used to be a smoker – and a heavy one at that (well, I didn’t weigh that much but I did smoke 25 a day). Which is why I became the holier-than-thou punof-a-bitch I am now.

But I do think it was the best thing I have ever done in my life. Indeed, I am convinced that if I had continued the way I was going, I’d have been in my grave many years ago.

It’s 30 years since I gave up my own 25-a-day habit after listening to an LP recorded by a hypnotist which I initially treated as a joke. Before turning in one night, I sat in the lounge and listened to this guy’s soothing voice telling me to close my eyes and imagine I was sunbathing in an idyllic scenario on a tropical island beach.

I was in paradise, he assured me, except for this ‘‘horrible, stinking weed’’ in my hand. ‘‘I want you to get it out of your life,’’ he ordered. ‘‘Throw it as far as you can and tell yourself you’ll never touch it again as long as you live.’’

I went to bed laughing under my breath, with no real

intention of giving up. Yet when I woke up the next morning, I thought to myself, ‘‘I’m not going to smoke today’’. And from that moment, the thought of taking even a single drag has revolted me ever increasingly.

Even more bizarrely, a few weeks later my late motherin-law, a lifelong smoker, listened to the same LP. And she never smoked another cigarette until the day she died. ‘‘So where can we get hold of this record?’’, I hear hordes of would-be ex-smokers begging. The answer is I don’t know. But I do know the hypnotist was called Edwin Heath – and that if you trawl about you’ll find references to him on the Internet.

What I do remember is that the LP had two sides – one titled something like ‘How To Give Up Smoking’, the other labelled ‘How To Lose Weight’. And I reckon a 50 per cent success rate’s not bad for anyone.

Agree or disagree, email your thoughts and comments to donna@thecourier.es

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Friday, July 8, 2011

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Friday, July 8, 2011

IT’S THE QUIZ WITH FIZZ...

Test your general knowledge with this exclusive Courier quiz with a Spanish flavour. Questions compiled by HAROLD HEYS 1. In which comic would you find Roger the Dodger?

11. What's the name of the river that runs through Lisbon?

12. In which Spanish city were Pablo Picasso and Antonio Banderas born?

2. In what year did Barcelona stage the summer Olympics?

3.

Where did ichthyosaurs live?

dinosaurs

called 13. Who was Prime Minister of Great Britain during the Second World War? 14. In what year did Edward VIII abdicate as king of Great Britain?

15. In what year did Pablo Picasso paint his famous cubist work ‘Guernica’?

4. If you were taking part in La Vuelta what would you be doing?

5. When did Cervantes write Don Quixote? Early 1600s, mid 1700s, or early 1800s?

6. Which fierce animal was “burning bright in the forests of the night?”

7. In which Spanish province is Seville?

16. Which country knocked Spain out of the 2002 World Cup? 17. What do the initials WA stand for in netball?

18. In which Spanish city was the racecourse of La Zarzuela opened?

8. What are Dover’s white cliffs made of?

19.What colour is teal?

20. Which of all the Spanish islands is the most populated?

9. In what year did King Juan Carlos I become Spain’s Head of State?

QUIZ ANSWERS: 1. The Beano; 2.

1992; 3. In the sea; 4. Riding a bike (Tour of Spain), 5: Two parts – 1605 and 1615; 6. Tiger (Blake poem); 7 Andalucia; 8. Chalk; 9.1975; 10. Sudan; 11. Tagus (or Rio Tejo); 12. Malaga; 13.

Winston Churchill; 14. 1936; 15. 1937; 16.Korea;17. Wing Attack; 18.. Madrid; 19 Deep green-blue; 20. Tenerife.

10. Khartoum is the capital of which African country?

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Friday, July 8, 2011

CURSED PAST THE POST...

For 15 years the two bitter Daily Mail racing journalists worked together without speaking.

Surely their bizarre feud had to end one day

By HARRY NUTTALL NEXT time you get into an argument in the office over whose turn it is to get the brews in, spare a thought for Shipton and Hoy of the Daily Mail. That’s just how their feud started. Their 15-year silent feud.

Jim Shipton and Joe Hoy were ageing sub-editors on the Mail’s Northern racing desk in Manchester and they sat next to each other in perpetual silence. Wars, major disasters, moon walks, sporting triumphs and tragedies, Page Three birds. Nothing came anywhere near to sparking a conversation. They lived in their own little worlds in which the other didn’t figure.

Their then colleague Phil Smith, now retired to Spain and living in Javea, recalls: ‘‘They used to sit there like Tweedledum and Tweedledee, only a couple of feet apart, and in several years at the Mail (where he was deputy sports editor) I don't think I ever heard them exchange a word. ‘‘I think it was over one not buying the other a cup of tea off the tea trolley. It was funny to watch them when the trolley came round. They'd sit and wait until the other was well clear of it before venturing near. Day after day. Year after year.’’

Former Mail sports sub-editor John Newman recalled that Shipton, who was apparently higher up the racingdesk pecking order, had the job of handing out the racecards and when there were five he would put three of them in Joe’s basket. If there were three, he would give him two. When there was only one card Joe Hoy would get it. There were never any arguments Phil Smith because no words were ever exchanged. An occasional grunt was as good as it got.

Smith recalls: ‘‘They would give the chief sub-editor a list of runners for each racecard and it was up to him to do the page layout and get the words edited on the desk. I don't think either of them were ever deemed capable of handling the work of the Mail’s racing writers Robin Goodfellow or Northerner. ‘‘They very occasionally slipped notes to each other and sometimes one would ask anybody who happened to be passing to hand the other a curt verbal messages along the lines of: “Tell ’im (over-theshoulder jerk of thumb) I haven’t got Sandown yet.” Of course, the rot should have been stopped at the outset but it never was and these two clowns turned it all into a bit of a circus. You could see the steam coming out of their ears at times with the sheer frustration of it all. Quite bizarre really.’

I’d always under-

stood that in newspapers, after a blazing row, it was off to the pub where the aggro would be quickly forgotten.

Jim Shipton and Joe Hoy never saw life that way. And then came the day of Joe’s departure … He was heading off that evening into honourable retirement. But there was still no sign of a thaw.

John Newman recalled: ‘‘I was given the job of organising the collection and in the interests of perhaps letting bygones be bygones I approached Jim Shipton for a donation. To my surprise, he obliged – with a smile and a quid. But like all good feuds, it wasn’t to be put to bed that easily.’’

Everyone knew that this was going to be the last opportunity anyone would ever have of effecting any sort of rapprochement between the grizzled grafters. John was determined to get it sorted. And, after a fashion, he did. ‘‘Everybody’s weighed in,’’ he told Joe late that afternoon.

With a meaningful glance at Jim he added: ‘‘Everybody.’’

It was the perfect moment for peace to finally break out.

John waited, expectantly. A nervous office was stilled to mere whispers. Even the news editor stopped shouting.

Joe looked up, quickly grasping the point John was making about Jim’s generous quid into the tub. Looking over to his old colleague with some warmth, he finally broke the glacial ice of some 15 years. ‘‘Thanks, Jim,’’ he said.

The moment might not have had the grandeur of the Cuban Missile Crisis which drew ‘Day the earth stood still’ headlines, but it was close. The office waited.

There was a breathless hush.

Jim Shipton, no doubt thinking that his old colleague was seeking an opportunity of having a final, smug dig; perhaps one last chance to take the p*ss, responded magnificently: ‘‘F*** off, Joe.’’

Friday, July 8, 2011

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Friday, July 8, 2011

FOOD FOR FRIENDSHIP! PREPARE yourselves for the Food Fair with Flair! The Residents’ Association representing the 3,000 homeowners of Doña Pepa and Lo Marabu are staging a two-day community spectacular next week in aid of the Paul Cunningham Nurses.

And they plan to make it an annual event where neighbours of different nationalities can spend time together enjoying the music and fun as well as raising money for charity The association’s objective is to encourage the integration of the expat community with the town of Rojales,

Doña Pepa Lo Marabu in community bonding fiesta increase the services in the area and improve the quality of residents’ day-today lives.

Next week’s festivities start at 11am on Friday (July 15) in the area in front of Manolo Restaurant in Calle Vigo, near the Consum and Lidl supermarkets on the road between Quesada Arches and

Carrefour. The association wanted to do something memorable and came up with the idea of an International Food Fair and Festival to help promote the businesses in the Doña Pepa and Lo Marabu area.

Seven restaurants and many local businesses are already involved. There will be an abundance of food and many

interesting stalls are being added daily, along with music and dance activities.

On offer will be a huge selection of tapas provided by Manolo Restaurant, an enormous paella made by Spanglish, Indian cuisine from Mohsin at The Indian Ocean, finalists in The Kitchen Cook Off, Chinese food and also Italian from 222 in Doña Pepa. And much, much more.

If you have a restaurant or business in the area and would like to be included please contact the association now via 639 318 526. If you would like to help in any way, call the same number or visit their website www.donapepaonline.com

IDEAL HOME: Keith and Gary’s prefab bungalow arrives on site

HOMELESS: The burnt-out remains of the brand-new three-bedroom structure

WHINES OF THE ZODIAC

Spain’s been a pain for star duo whose dream went up in flames DUO ZODIAC could be forgiven i they opened their cabaret act with a number called ‘Singing in the Pain’.

Because much of their 10 years in Spain has been a catalogue of horror for partners Keith Wilson and Gary Clark.

And their problems started as soon as they arrived in Benidorm in a battered £200 camper van after breaking down twice en route from the UK. On stage, the career of Keith and Gary - who appear at Bar Catorce in Benijofar nxt week - has been a major success. But the chronicle of disaster includes: l Discovering l on their arrival in the Costa Blanca that the fulltime residency they had been promised in Albia didn’t exist – because the owners had done a runner. l Being ripped off by a rogue English builder.

l Buying a pre-fabricated threebedroom bungalow only to see it burnt to the ground before they could move in. l Discovering their insurance didn’t cover their £150,000 loss because assembly of the bungalow on wheels had not been completed. l Using what little money they had left to buy a mobile home – only to suffer a break-in in which their work equipment, all electrical items and even their African Grey Parrot were stolen. l Former Blackpool hotelier Keith suffering a deep-vein thrombosis whilst compering a fiesta in Rojales – and being ordered to take six months off work with no income.

But it’s not all been bad for Duo Zodiac, who for the past four years have been entertaining guests at Benidorm’s Rio Park Hotel two days a

week.

Before that, six-and-a-half years of regular work at Bentley’s Bar in Moraira helped to finance the purchase and renovation of a rundown finca in the middle of the orange groves near the town of Xativa.

But things went pear-shaped after they sold up and moved on.

Says Keith: ‘’We had to make a serious decision after the bungalow burnt out – do we move back to the UK, or stay in Spain? Well, we couldn’t go back. We had just financially been wiped out – we didn’t even have the flight money left. It was totally devastating.’’

He and Gary, who is originally from Weymouth, now live in a rented property in Relleu, 20 minutes inland from Benidorm – and love it. l Booking is strongly advised for ‘Duo Zodiac’s show at Bar Catorce next Saturday (July 16th).

SMILING THROUGH THE PAIN: Duo Zodiac’s Keith Wilson (left) and Gary Clark

Friday, July 8, 2011

HELP US TO CARE

An urgent plea for volunteers

DUE to the continued success of HAH Help at Home, both in the Mar Menor and Costa Blanca areas, we are now looking for more CARERS who would be able to give a little of their time to help others.

Quite a lot of people go back to the UK for the summer months, but unfortunately there are still a lot of people struggling to cope here.

You do not need to be experienced, just to have common sense and the desire to help. Some of our carers are qualified,

and both teams have qualified nurses assessing and implementing care plans.

Time given will be of your choice, and based on what you can give - some weeks may be busier than others.

If you think you can give a little time please either contact Lesley, HAH Help at Home (Mar Menor) on 968 134 978 or email helpathomespain@gmail.com or contact Sheila, HAH Help at Home (Costa Blanca) on 603 245 020 or email info@HelpAtHomecb.org

Ron Stokes presents HAH’s Jackie Ree with 800€

That was a month, that was!

IT’S been another fantastic month for HAH Help at Home, who after several very busy and successful months decided it was time for the volunteers to recharge their batteries.

However, requests for fundraising continued, one of these being an auction at Lui’s Lounge, San Javier, which raised a fantastic 400€. This was followed recently by an ‘Open Day’ with raffle, cava and nibbles at the Solo Boutique in Los Belones, with its selection of fabulous clothes.

Jan’s Lounge (next door) then provided an excellent lunch enjoyed by more than 30 people.

These events raised a further 263€ and HAH Caring Service co-ordinator Jackie THE Bronze medal winning Harmonisers will have Ree said: ‘’We’ve had a phetheir final rehearsal on Tuesday before enjoying a nomenal amount of support well-earned summer break. from people, and money conHowever, musical director Gail Grainger, has given tinues to be raised on our the group new songs to learn whilst they holiday, behalf”. together with competition numbers for next year’s HAH, along with the convention in Benalmadena,where she will be hoping Provincial Grand Lodge to strike Gold!

Charity and El Buen The chorus would like to thank all the restaurants, Samaritano, were among the bars and bistros that have let them entertain custocharities to benefit from the mers at their Tuesday evening Socials. They also monies raised this year by thank diners and holidaymakers alike for their genethe Masonic Luz de Murcia rous donations to the charity buckets, which amssed Lodge. around 700 euros for the needy people helped by Delighted CARITAS. For more information about close harmony This year’s Worshipful singing, call Peter Stephen on 966 716 643 or visit Master, Ron Stokes, was www.harmonisers.com delighted to present Jackie Ree with 800€ of the money raised at various events during his year.

He thanked HAH for all their valuable work for the FOLLOWING three highly successful years, the fourth community, and also for supInternational Choral Workshop will take place in the Hotel porting the events during his Cabo Cervera in La Mata on the first six days of August – time in office. culminating in a concert in the hotel on the 6th (20.00).

Jackie added: ‘’HAH have The workshop is run by father-and-son music profeshelped so many people of all sionals Nigel and Matthew Hopkins, both highly respecages who were struggling to ted throughout Europe as conductors, singers and vocal cope in their homes following coaches. Nigel has just conducted the highly successful health issues - and this genconcerts, 'An Evening with Andrew Lloyd Webber', plaerous donation will ensure ying to capacity audiences at the Orihuela Costa Resort. that we continue with this Those concerts will be repeated on Saturday July 30 at FREE service.

El Castelar College in San Pedro. Matthew is Director of ‘’There are so many peoMusic at Nottingham Trent University in the UK. ple needing help, seven The course is highly recommended for anyone who clients last month takes their singing seriously, or who would simply like to alone, and ALL money raised do it better. For details of the course, either call 966 775 976, or email westendworkshop@gmail.com. on our behalf goes back into Registration Day is Sunday July 17 at the Cabo Cervera the community”.

Hotel (11am-3pm).Course fee is 35€, in return for which She then thanked everyparticipants receive both the sheet music for the course one involved for their supAND a rehearsal CD of the same. port.

HARMONISERS ON THE GOLD TRAIL

Sing out for a place in the Choral Workshop!

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Friday, July 8, 2011

MYSTERY OF THE MISSING BABIES

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Were they really abducted and sold?

PRODDED by grieving parents, Spanish judges are investigating hundreds of charges that infants were abducted and sold for adoption over a 40-year period.

Flawed records are central to the complaint filed by Dolores Díaz Cerpa, who alleges that her newborn was abducted in 1973. Mrs. Díaz Cerpa had been told by a doctor that she was carrying twins. She gave birth to a daughter, but a nurse denied that she had What may have begun as political retaliation carried another foetus. for leftist families during the dictatorship of Always suspecting a lie, and after hearing Gen. Francisco Franco appears to have mutatabout other parents who were searching for ed into a trafficking business in which doctors, stolen newborns, she asked the hospital for nurses and even nuns colluded with criminal another copy of her daughter’s birth record. networks.

Instead, she received a record for a boy.

Dolores Díaz Cerpa said she was carrying “The hospital suggested this was just an twins in 1973, but the hospital said she delivold administrative error, but nobody can conered only a girl. Lawsuits have been filed to vince me that I haven’t sadly been right for learn the truth. decades,” Mrs. Díaz Cerpa said.

The cases, which could eventually run into Some couples, like Joaquín Sáez Naranjo the thousands, are jolting a country still shaken and Manuela Sánchez Cintado of Seville, are by the spoken and unspoken terrors of Spain’s pursuing multiple lawsuits. They lost two 1936-39 Civil War and Franco’s rule. Last babies in suspicious circumstances, in 1972 week, 78-year-old Concepción Rodrigo and then in 1985.

Romero joined the rapidly growing ranks of In the 1985 case, Mrs. Sánchez Cintado Spanish parents who are turning to the courts said that doctors performed a sonogram, and to uncover the fates of their babies.

Joaquín Sáez Naranjo and Manuela Sánchez Cintado claim that their that she was congratulated for carrying a boy.

Mrs. Rodrigo Romero, a former seamstress, After giving birth, she was informed that the babies were abducted from Spanish hospitals years ago gave birth prematurely in 1971. A doctor in a newborn had been sent to a special ward to Seville hospital told her that she had had a the civil war. The cases of disappeared infants stretch from deal with “a small problem.” Her husband was separately son, who was small but “fine and capable of getting a lot big- 1950 to 1990, continuing well after Franco’s death in 1975. told that his baby daughter had died. ger,” she recalled in an interview.

It is not known whether government officials played any role.

“I was going to have a boy and somebody switched him The doctor never reappeared, and she never saw her Mr. Conde-Pumpido, who said it was impossible to esti- for a dead daughter,” a visibly shaken Mrs. Sánchez Cintado baby again. Two days later, another doctor at the hospital mate how many more cases would surface, also suggested recalled. “This was as ridiculous a story as if the doctor had told her husband that the baby had been sent to another for the first time that organized crime “networks” had been told me that I had broken my elbow and then started operathospital for further checks, but had died there. involved. He gave no details, saying only that he did not ing on my wrist.”

The second hospital had taken care of the burial, the doc- believe that “one single organization” had masterminded all Like other parents, Mr. Sáez Naranjo said that he now tor said, and the body lay in Seville’s San Fernando ceme- the abductions. deeply regretted having accepted a doctor’s advice that it tery, in an unmarked grave.

Antonio Barroso, the president of Anadir, said he believed would be best for him and his wife not to deal with the shock “Deep inside, I’ve always known that my son was stolen that over time Spain became a hub for gangs operating an of seeing the dead baby’s body. Instead, he went to Seville’s from me,” Mrs. Rodrigo Romero said. international trade, with many newborns sold into adoption San Fernando cemetery for the burial of “a bundle of cloth” Spain’s judiciary was forced into action after Anadir, an overseas. in a common grave.

Misleading The possibility of such an operation is one of many unanswered questions posed by the searing journey of longsilent parents and children in recent months.

Mr. Barroso, 42, founded Anadir last year, after being told by a friend that they were both adopted. He took DNA samples from the woman he had always known as his mother and confronted her after tests showed that his sample and hers were not a match.

She admitted paying a nun for a baby and misleading her son about his birth for decades.

Mr. Barroso said he had since tracked down the nun, who had worked in a maternity ward. His own lawsuit — against the nun and other hospital staff members — has yet to be heard in court, and he is still searching for his real parents.

According to Anadir, a handful of adopted people have managed to find their parents, but so far most have preferred to remain anonymous. To help with legal matters, Anadir and other similar associations that have sprung up as the list of plaintiffs grows are trying to recruit lawyers willing to work on a pro bono basis.

Dolores Díaz Cerpa claims she was carrying twins in 1973, but the hospital insisted that she gave birth to only one baby girl association formed to represent people searching for missing children or parents, filed its first complaints in late January. Attorney General Cándido Conde-Pumpido announced on June 18 that 849 cases were being examined, adding that 162 already could be classified as criminal proceedings because of evidence pointing to abductions.

The statute of limitations on most of the suspected crimes has expired, prompting lawyers to discuss whether a special statute can be adopted. In 2008, Baltasar Garzón, Spain’s most internationally renowned judge, extended an investigation into allegations of crimes during the Franco era to examine whether Franco had ordered thousands of babies taken from women who had supported his republican opponents in

Last week, he was back at the cemetery, only to be told by staff members that the remains in that grave had been moved a decade ago to an unspecified location.

In separate interviews, some grieving parents said they allowed hospitals to handle the burials because their own insurance policies did not cover such costs. Others also said they were too naïve or uneducated to challenge medical workers, despite their suspicions.

Criminal Last month, the first cemetery exhumations took place in La Línea de la Concepción, after allegations that newborns had been buried there. Madrid’s regional attorney’s office has said that it would require medical staff members, including nuns who worked as nurses, to testify in court about the whereabouts of some children who were born during the 40year period under investigation.

As in Mr. Barroso’s case, a few nuns have confessed to selling children, but without suggesting that they were part of a criminal network. The Roman Catholic Church has had no comment.

A Madrid company has built up a DNA data bank from about 700 people since January. Yet even with DNA testing, prosecutors face a struggle to search common graves for the remains of babies supposedly buried there. Medical records often prove to be incomplete or contradictory.

A photograph of Dolores Díaz Cerpa's daughter During the Franco regime and in its immediate aftermath, “you simply didn’t challenge what an official told you,” said María Luisa Puro Rodríguez, a former tobacco factory worker who claims that her newborn was abducted in 1976 from a Malaga hospital. “We now thankfully live in a society where it is normal to question what we hear,” she said. “I’ve learned this bitter lesson and am now ready to fight all the way to find out what actually happened.”

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Friday, July 8, 2011

WHAT THE SPAN

HELP FOR SPAIN’S DESPERATE AS BANKS FACE MORTGAGE CAP

Dozens held in Costa Blanca trafficking and sex swoops

By SALLY BENGTSSON THE horrific story of a five-year old girl who was trafficked to the UK and kept as a slave for over a decade is so shocking it’s hard to believe it really happened.

However, the sad truth is that this kind of intolerable cruelty goes on a lot more than people realise. And Spain is no exception as to how people are exploited, with traffickers taking advantage of their desperate wish to make a better life for themselves and their families.

Last Sunday Valencian police arrested a gang which was illegally trafficking Indian and Pakistani citizens. The victims were brought to Spain illegally, after paying more then 8,000 euros for the chance of a “decent job in Europe”.

Upon arrival they were herded into “patera” flats (named after the tiny makeshift rafts and boats which bring African immigrants to Spanish shores every summer).

The new arrivals were then forced to work, unpaid, in the agricultural sector, harvesting fruit and vegetables.

They were told that their entire earnings were going to pay off their debt to the traffickers and threats made to protesters’ families.

The immigrants were offered the chance to become

legal citizens by arranged marriages with Spanish and Portuguese women - for additional 8,000 euros.

So far 54 people have been arrested and questioned, most of them Indians and Pakistanis.

Two houses were searched, in Valencia and Benidorm, resulting in the disclosure of the whole operation.

Meanwhile, in Alicante, Guardia Civil officers arrested a gang which brought under-age women to Spain to work as prostitutes and then blackmailed the girls’ wealthy clients.

The investigation, codenamed LUPO, was centred around Torrevieja, where 11 people were arrested, four of them clients. Various properties and “night” clubs in Torrevieja were searched.

The girls involved, some from Brazil, all had one thing in common - economic problems. Their families were promised huge quantities of money if the girls became high-class prostitutes.

Once here in Spain, they were offered to clients in Torrevieja, Guardamar and Orihuela. Gang members then threatened to report the wealthy men unless they handed over more money.

The detainees, including Spaniards, Brazilians, Norwegians and Georgians, are in jail awaiting sentence.

SPAIN will ease conditions for people who can't pay their mortgages as floating interest rates rise and unemployment remains the highest in the European Union.

Interior Minister Alfredo Perez Rubalcaba (pictured) said the government will decree a new and higher limit on the amount banks can legally deduct from the wages of a mortgage holder in default.

The government is contemplating other new rules to protect homeowners four years after the property bubble burst, leaving many Spaniards stuck in homes worth much less than what they owe the bank.

‘Indignados’ or ‘indignant’ protests around Spain in recent months have called on the government to address the plight of borrowers who can be evicted by the banks but still owe the entire amount of their mortgage even though the bank now owns their home.

Banking groups have warned that changing mortgage rules could send the wrong message to investors, who are concerned about the high levels of exposure to bad property loans in Spain's financial system, particularly if applied retroactively.

Rubalcaba did not say whe-

ther the measure would be retroactive. Under current rules banks can deduct all but 641 euros of monthly wages. The new amount protected from deductions will be 961 euros.

"This will help a lot of people who are having a rough time or who may have a rough time," Rubalcaba said in a television broadcast.

Spain's tough mortgage rules are part of what has kept the country's property prices from correcting more sharply four years after the real estate boom came to a dramatic end.

There is no incentive in Spain for property owners to walk away from their home.

Frustration over the credit crisis has led to a series of blockades on planned evictions across the country as protesters arrive with lawyers and try to block evictions by banks.

Friday, July 8, 2011

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NISH PAPERS SAY

CHE’S MOTORBIKE PARTNER DIES AGED 88

DAVID MECA: Spain’s champion long-distance swimmer

Leaf it alone!

Spinach nitrates pose a threat to babies, say Spanish nutritionists

CHAMPION swimmer David Meca was among 22 people who set off from Ibiza to Alicante on Wednesday on a relay swim for cancer awareness.

The 180-kilometre swim will take the group until today (Friday), when they reach Alicante’s Playa del Postiguet.

The event has been organised by AEAL, the Spanish Association of People Affected by Lymphoma, Myeloma and Leukaemia, whose representative for Murcia is among the participants.

Víctor Rodríguez, who recovered from lymphatic cancer a year ago, said: ‘‘Everything in this life is possible if you set out to do it’’.

He added that the main reason for the swim is to ‘‘send a message to all those who are going through what I recently went through, so they can see that this can be overcome’’.

Each of the participants is covering a distance of between 10 and 20 kilometres during their onehour relay, with some as young as 13 taking part.

CHAIN-SAW TRAGEDY A 68-YEAR-OLD German man died in a chainsaw accident on Tuesday while he and a neighbour were pruning a tree in his garden in Marbella’s Elviria area.

The victim’s arm was reportedly severed when the neighbour lost control of the saw - and he bled to death, despite efforts by local police and paramedics to stem the flow of blood.

The 48 -old-neighbour, also German, now faces charges of involuntary manslaughter. He is understood to have told police that the accident happened when the saw chain jammed.

FOR years we have been told that spinach is a rich source of iron and should be eaten regularly. However, the latest advice for pregnant women is, “Forget about adding spinach to baby's food.”

The Spanish Agency for Food Safety and Nutrition (AESAN) also says expectant mothers and children under the age of three should not eat bluefin tuna or swordfish. As for shellfish, “it is best not to indulge too often.”

AESEN has become stricter with its recommendations about the consumption of these food items due to high levels of mercury in the larger fish, cadmium in crustaceans and nitrates in vegetables.

The fatty tissue in predatory fish species soaks up the mercury found in their prey, in the very toxic form of methyl mercury. This metal, which is chiefly generated by industrial activity, is accumulated by aquatic organisms all the way up the food chain until it is consumed by humans.

And it can cause serious alterations to neural development in foetuses and very young children. ‘’The presence of this metal varies from one fishing ground to the next, and the

Mediterranean is highly contaminated," says Professor Joan Lobart of Barcelona University.

As for vegetables, the trouble lies with nitrates, a naturally occurring compound present in soil but whose concentration increases through the intensive use of fertilisers. Plants, especially leafy ones like spinach, lettuce and chard, absorb them.

"Nitrates by themselves are not very toxic, but the human body converts them into nitrites, which can cause cyanosis or 'blue baby syndrome, caused by a lack of oxygen in the blood," explains Victorio Teruel, AESAN’s head of chemical risk assessment.

Following conclusions reached by the European Food Safety Authority, AESAN has decided to recommend, for the first time, that parents refrain from feeding spinach to infants under 12 months old, or if they do, to ensure it represents no more than 20 percent of food intake.

"The spinach should not be kept at room temperature because these conditions can double the amount of nitrite," says Fernando Pérez, a pediatrician at Severo Ochoa Hospital in Madrid.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

When I was at school, I used to worry about what I would do if I didn't get great marks in class BELIEVE it or not, at my school it was cool to be clever, so most kids were keen to do well.

While most of the time that was good thing, sometimes we all felt the pressure to come out top.

We've all heard that it's important to work hard at school and do your best. I think that's good advice. But what should you do if your best isn't enough to get the grades you want?

If you're trying hard, but still struggling with your school work, what should you do? Worry about it? Ask for help? Or is it easier to just give up all together?

Do you worry about school?

It's quite usual to struggle with school work - apparently one in five kids do. If you are having a hard time don't be embarrassed to ask for help - that's what parents and teachers are there for.

If you've had help and you still feel you can't cope, then don't worry. You could be great at something more practical.

If you're good at fixing stuff, you could become a mechanic, if you're good at

art, you could become a designer. It is not the end of the world. If you are studying for exams and you fail as long as you have tried your best that is all anyone can ask of you. If you have a learning need such as Dsylexia then additional time can be given to you in

exams to complete the Exams. If you have problems with reading you may also be entitled to have someone read for you as well as write for you. All English and International schools will be able to help you with this as per the conditions set out for children

with special requirements by the examining board. Exams can also be retaken as can repeating a year in Spanish school. All adults will probably tell you that being 15/ 16 and studying for exams is one of the hardest times of their lives. So there will be someone who understands.

Kids tell us their school worries.

If you are worried about your school work, the most important thing to try and realise is that not doing well in class doesn't mean you're a failure.

You might not be top of your maths class, but that doesn't mean you won't become a success in life.

So instead of worrying about your school work, spend that time finding

something else you're good at...and do your best to become great at it.

If you chose to leave school at 16 with your Spanish Diploma or GCSEs, there are options for you here in Spain. The first step is to try and decide what you want for the future this is usually based on something you are interested in. For example if you want to work in the Media industry you need to find out what qualifications you are going to need and then work backwards. This can be done by contacting local newspapers, radio and TV stations and speaking to their personnel department. Or look on the internet at job specifications for journalists. If a degree is required you then need to look at the entry

requirements at Universities for these courses and then look at how to obtain these qualifications.

Further Education is available at all of the International Schools and it is possible to study for the Bachillerato at Spanish schools. Whether you study A levels, BTEC, or Bachillerato you can then progress to studying for a degree either in Spain the UK or other parts of the world.

For many 16 year olds studying in higher education is not something that they want to do. Lots of young people learn better through learning a trade whilst working. It is possible to do this in Spain and you need again to decide on an interest that you have and try and seek an apprenticeship with a local business or offer to work voluntarily to gain work experience. San Miguel College and Oscar Marine who offer engineering courses, are looking at these options so that apprenticeships can be offered along with BTEC courses.

There are a number of Hair and Beauty courses that are available at local salons. We suggest that you watch in the local press for Careers evenings that schools and colleges may be offering in the near future.

Written by Mar Azul International School, info@marazulinternationalschool.com www.marazulinternationalschool.com

GB v Spain - tomorrow!

JUNIOR Strikers Football Academy present their annual Charity Match t o m o r r o w (Saturday).

The game will take place at the Estadio Ikomar in Pilar de la Horadada.

The doors will open at 7.15pm and kick off will be at 8pm. The format has been changed this year from the normal England v Spain adult game. Children have been selected to play in this year’s match by local coaches Junior and Trino.

The match is to raise funds for the Butterfly Children (Debra Espana) and local swimming champion Adam Stewart, who needs to raise 500 euros in order to be able to compete in November’s Downs Syndrome international competition in Portugal.

Local dance group Dance Extreme will be once again providing pre-match and half time entertainment. Event organiser Junior told us; ‘‘This event has grown each year and has become something that locals look

forward to. ‘‘The match was well supported last year with over 300 people attending, I would love to better that this year so please come down to cheer the teams on. We have chosen to raise funds for two great charities, there is no admission fee but all donations are welcome. The proceeds from this match will be split between The Butterfly Children and Adam Stewart. Your support is needed”.

Pilar de la Horadada-based company Costamed Consulting are this year’s main sponsors. They have also agreed to be annual charity match sponsors for the fore’seeable future. Junior added: ‘It’s great news that I have found a sponsor who is willing to support this event year on year, I would like to thank Costamed Consulting owner Nicola Tait for joining forces with me in order to make this charity event a major success”.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

THE INBETWEENERS Freaky forces of Mother Nature

NATURE can be unbelievably powerful. A major earthquake can topple huge buildings and bring down entire mountainsides. At Niagara Falls, more than 500,000 gallons (1,892,705 litres) of water crash down 18 stories into the Niagara River every second— enough to fill nearly 50 Olympic-size swimming pools in a minute! And everyone knows about hurricanes, blizzards, avalanches, forest fires, floods, tidal waves, and even thunderstorms. But if you thought Mother Nature didn't have many surprises up her sleeve, think again. Nature has a load of other powers that, while less well-known, can only be described as, well, freaky. formed in storms when raindrops are carried The Mother of All Tornadoes The fastest wind speed ever recorded—318 into extremely cold areas of the atmosphere miles an hour (511 kilometers an hour)— by powerful vertical winds. The longer the occurred during a tornado near Oklahoma tiny specks of ice bounce around in the wind, City in 1999. Scientists classify tornadoes by the bigger they become. When the clumps of the damage they can do. A tornado with wind ice grow too big for the wind to hold up, they speeds of 70 miles an hour can sweep away fall to the ground as hail. entire houses and hurl cars through the air like missiles. But a tornado with wind speeds of more than 300 miles an hour has the power to derail train cars, tear grass from the ground, and even rip pavement from the street.

Dodge Balls About 1,000 years ago hundreds of people were mysteriously killed in the Himalaya. A recent investigation concluded that they were caught in a hailstorm that dropped chunks of ice the size of baseballs on the victims' heads at more than 100 miles an hour (160 kilometers an hour). Hail is

Carry on golfing!

By PHILIP HALL, 15

MY favourite club in my golf bag has to be my 1 wood.(driver) The feeling of smashing the ball down the fairway with this massive club is incredible. The driver is classed as a wood, Woods are the clubs that hit the ball the furthest distance. Usually you have a 1,3 and 5 wood in your golfing bag, but some professionals only use a 1 and 3 wood.

As the golfing world has advanced and become increasingly popular all around the world, so has the technology that goes into the clubs.

Now the club heads on the woods are so much larger than they use to be hundreds of years ago when golf started. The driver in my opinion has improved the most. (technological wise) Some of the drivers on the market have moving parts so you can now customise your club so much easier.

By ELLIS NASTRI, 15

Alicante or BUSt AS I am getting older I want to hang out with my mates more. The only problem is that they live in San Juan and I live in Gran Alacant (about a 30 minutes journey by car), so for me to get there I have to rely on my mum.

This is OK but my mum is always busy and hasn’t got time to take me there, so I say drop me of in Alicante, which is a 15 minute drive, and I will get the bus from there.

Recently I have been using the bus more and more often in Alicante to get around , but I have never got it from my house to Alicante, and thought that would be a good idea. Then I wouldn’t need to ask my mum for anything (in terms of driving me places).

Every day when she used to drive me to school I would see bus 27 Urbonova to Alicante outside my house , so I thought that must be the bus I need One day I was in Alicante with my friend.

It was about 6:30 pm and we needed to get

back to ‘s mum’s house but she was too busy to come pick me up at that time. So I said that I knew what bus we needed to get.

We looked on the internet where a number 27 bus stop was and went to it. By the time we got there is was about 7 pm and we sat down. Buses drove past but none them was a 27, Half an hour later we saw a sign saying the 27 bus comes every 45 minutes. Only got 15 minutes more to wait, we thought.

And what happen? No bus! To make it worse it began to rain (nice).

The bus took another 30 minutes to arrive, so we got on the and asked the driver if it went to Gran Alacant. The driver said “ no”.

So after an hour and a half of waiting in the rain, the bus didn’t even take us there.

So I went back to the old tactic and phoned mum.

To this day I am still trying to figure out what bus I need to get to Alicante.

The Celts Golf Club The shape has also changed in the many years golf has been played, these days some of the club heads are a lot more square shaped than they use to be.

The most important club that will always be in your golf bag is the putter.

This club is used to end every hole (unless you get lucky with a hole in one or an amazing approach shot) is the ball is on the green and has stopped moving you use your putter to hit the golf ball along the floor (hopefully) towards the hole.

The putter in my opinion hasn’t advanced as much as the other club you would find in a golf bag.

Although its shape has changed slightly on some makes you can still buy the thin long putters that looks similar to older putters used previously in the game’s history.

The Celts Golf Club is a new golf club on the Costa Blanca and is run by John O’Brien and Denis McCormack. Although its name the club is open to everyone no matter what nationality. The golf club has a federation license and provides many services. These services include federated handicaps and registration into tournaments all over Spain.

You do need a handicap to join, but don’t worry if you haven’t got one because the club will help you get one. The club doesn’t have a home golf course, however they provide many games in which you can play. They provide the opportunity for you to play expensive golf course.(Its cheaper for a group to go round a

course) The clubs number one aim is to try and provide affordable golf with a registration fee of approx 100 euros. It is open to any ages that are interested. I interviewed one of the founders of the club John O’Brien,(a teacher at my school) he said “the club is trying to provide a place for interested golfers at an affordable price.” John went on to explain there is already a German club, The Celts Golf Cub will try and organize matches between the two clubs.

John said “ I am a very interested golfer myself, I have been playing golf since I was 9.” If you wish to contact the club with any questions or for more information please phone John on 662422605.

Would you like to write as an Inbetweener?

Send us your stories to office@thecourier.es

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Friday, July 8, 2011

Friday, July 8, 2011

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Do you have a SPECIAL OFFER that you want EVERYONE to know about?

Call the office on: 96 672 6437 Email: office@thecourier.es Or get in touch with your sales rep.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

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Friday, July 8, 2011

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain four years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then.

Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Bernie was having problems editing and print- ADVICE: Ken wanted to know how to change the font colour within Windows Live Mail ing his scanned photos Equipment: - Lap Top Dell latitude D505 / Printer HP Deskjet F2180. When I scan in documents they always end up as Jpegs which of course to me means picture which I cannot edit and sometimes print off's do not fit onto a A4 page. Am I making a basic mistake or is that how it is.

Q

Hi Bernie, I would say that it’s correct that your scanner software is saving files in the .jpg format, that’s a pretty standard picture format. I'm not sure what you mean by being able to change and print the files; however I suspect that you simply don’t have, or are not using the correct software. For photo editing there is a great, freely downloadable package called paint.net - you can download it from www.getpaint.net it’s a great, free photo editing application, nothing like Adobe Photoshop of course, but also nothing like the price!

Alternatively you could download Google's Picasa from http://picasa.google.com; it is a great photo library application that also has some basic photo editing functions built in (if you find paint.net a bit overwhelming). As for printing, both of these applications has built in printing options; however I find that Windows Photo Viewer is pretty good and easy to use, it comes with all the modern versions of windows and allows you to easily print A4 photos. Hope this helps, get back to me if you have any more questions.

A

Update: Thank you for responding to my original query and no sooner had I finished my session than I picked up the courier and saw that someone was asking you the same question I think they call it murphy's.

I forgot to ask you about Wi-Fi routers. I am looking at moving providers from my current provider who is quiet expensive to something more suited to my pocket but provides a good package, yes I know good luck! Anyway having now acquired 2 / 3 routers at unreasonable cost I am wondering if they can be unblocked, much as a mobile phone could be and if so where can I get it done or can I purchase, either at an electrical retailer or on line, a router that gives out a reasonable signal strength.

Reply: Hi Bernie, routers are never "locked" to a certain provider, any ADSL router can be used on any ADSL provider, it may need to be reconfigured for the particular settings for the new provider but that is something that any computer engineer should be able to do easily for you, it’s just a matter of logging onto the routers admin screen and changing the relevant values for the new ADSL provider and usually changing the username and password for the new provider.

As for strength of signal on a Wi-Fi router, the type of router should be matched with the type of wireless network card in your laptop/PC; the wireless-n (802.11n) standard currently provides the best range and speed, it works on the principal of MIMO (Multi In, Multi Out) where the router allows multiple connections from the same computer at the same time to provide greater range and speed, however most people are more than happy with the wireless-g (802.11g) standard - both of these signal types will be on the box of any router that you buy, its important however to remember that for an ADSL (phone line) router you need an ADSL router (generally called modem-router in Spain).

Q A

Hi Richard, can you please help. How do I permanently set up the font colour on text for my 'e' mails, using Windows Live Hotmail?

Hi Brian, this is a pretty easy one but does depend on the version of Internet Explorer that you have (assuming that you are using Internet Explorer, let me know if you are not), just Click Tools, Internet options and under the home page delete what is there and type the address of the site you want.

ADVICE: Judith was having problems with her Skype after having her computer repaired.

I have a Dell laptop which is causing me problems. I had to go to UK for 1 year and whilst there had my laptop "sorted" by someone in my home town!!! On returning here I still had problems so I took it to a pc engineer!!!! ARGHHHH I’ve finally got it back but now I can't use Skype as the other person is unable to hear me, I can hear them!!! All was fine before engineer messed with it. My main problem now is that the place where I took it is always shut and their phone is "user busy" all the time. Is this problem an easy one to fix please?? Fingers crossed you can help me??

Q A

Hi Judith, I wonder whether your problem is a simple one of having the wrong recording device set up in Skype, you can check this by clicking on Tools, Options from within Skype, selecting Audio Settings and trying the different options next to the microphone - when you get the right one you will see the volume indicator underneath the microphone options light up in green in response to the level of background noise.

I hope this helps, if it doesn’t then please get back to me.

ADVICE: Ken wanted to know how to change the font colour within Windows Live Mail

Q A

Hi Richard, can you please help. How do I permanently set up the font colour on text for my 'e' mails, using Windows Live Hotmail?

Hi Ken, to change the default font style, type and colour in Windows Live Mail you should do the following…

• Select Tools, Options from the menu in Windows Live Mail (you may have to hold down the Alt key to see the menu bar) • Click on the Compose tab.

• Under Compose Font, click Font Settings • Choose the desired font and colour.

• Click OK …that’s it – good luck!

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

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Friday, July 8, 2011

PLANNING AHEAD

Planning ahead for family meals will prevent you from asking your family: 'What do you want to have for dinner?' Also, family meal planning will help you to provide a balanced diet for yourself and your family . Here are some tips and a sample menu chart...

BEFORE you start with family meal planning, understanding about nutrition can help.

In family meal planning, you should try to include as many nutrients as possible in every single serving. Proteins are very important for our bodies, as they are the building blocks. They are especially important in children's diet. Carbohydrates provide the body with efficient and accessible source of energy. Healthy fats are required by the body, they also help to keep the skin healthy looking. Two very important nutrients are vitamins and minerals, which you can get from various dried fruits, nuts, and vegetables. Water is also an important nutrient which the body requires. Hence, try to include lots of fruit juices, fresh fruits, raw salad veggies, soups, etc. in your meal so that the body keeps getting adequate fluid.

FAMILY MEAL PLANNING TIPS AND IDEAS All the above nutrients should be present in the right amount. This can get very confusing when planning family meal menu. A simplest way to do this is to find out the best and healthy food sources for these nutrients and

try to include them as much as possible in your meal. The amount of vitamins and minerals used for cooking should be stressed on. Hence, try to serve 4-5 servings of fruit and at least two servings of salad vegetables. Serve fruit salads or vegetable salad as much as you can, and make the plate as colourful as possible. This will ensure that there are various nutrients present in that serving and also plenty of antioxidants. Also, include more lean protein in the meal plan and less of carbs and even lesser of fats.

When laying out a family meal planning, you should keep in mind the individual conditions; such as, if somebody in your family is allergic to specific foods, or somebody is suffering from a condition and needs to follow a specific diet. You might think that considering all these things will only make cooking very difficult. Hence, even smarter family meal planning chart is required.

Given below, are various healthy lunch options, dinner options and breakfast and snacks ideas. You can use them to make a bi-weekly family meal. You can keep these meals in any combinations. Also, feel free to make modifications according to the needs

Chicken noodle soup and garlic bread of the family members. A standard meal plan for the day should go in this order: 1. Healthy breakfast 2. Light snack 3. Lunch 4. Medium-heavy snack 5. Light dinner In between the meals, one can have healthy drinks like green tea, chamomile tea, lemongrass tea, etc. However, if somebody in the family needs to have coffee or tea, then go for the decaf variety. Also, it is recommended for an individual to drink 2-3 litres of water every day. So, in between the meals, water can be consumed. Make sure you do not have water an hour before or after your lunch or dinner meal. This tends to dilute the stomach acids and makes digestion weak.

So, here are some ideas on various meals and snacks.

• Cereal with bananas and orange juice • Oatmeal with strawberries and carrot juice • Scrambled eggs with toast and lychee juice • Beans on toast and mango juice • Yogurt milkshake with veg sandwich • Pancakes and mix fruit salad • Poached eggs and mixed fruit juice • • • •

Fruit salad Fruit smoothie Bowl of fresh veggies Chicken salad with no dressing

• Green tea with oatmeal cookies • Mixed salad with Chicken sandwich • Macaroni and cheese with grilled fish • Sliced veggie salads with hummus • Cucumber salad with mushroom omelette and toast • Turkey salad with mix veg fried rice • Pasta salad with grilled chicken • Steamed rice with salad and grilled fish • • • • •

Lean turkey sandwich and dry fruits Chicken sandwich and green tea Bowl of fresh fruits and dried nuts Yogurt smoothie with almonds Peanut butter sandwich & mix veg juice

• Steamed fish with bok choy • Fresh veggies salad & chicken soup with bread • Root vegetables with lentil casserole • Lemon rice with prawn salad • Baked fish and potato salad • Chicken noodle soup and garlic bread • Mixed veg salad with tuna casserole These were the various ideas on family meals and how to go about it. So, create a weekly family meal plan and stick to it. Plan in advance and you will be able to provide a balanced diet to everybody in the family.

Also, with a family meal plan you don't have to repeat the question 'what do you want to have for dinner?'

A Bit Of Fun LITTLE Johnny and his family lived in the country, and as a result seldom had guests.

He was eager to help his mother after his father appeared with two dinner guests from the office.

When the dinner was nearly over, Little Johnny went to the kitchen and proudly carried in the first piece of apple pie, giving it to his father who passed it to a guest.

Little Johnny came in with a second piece of pie and gave it to his father, who again gave it to a guest.

This was too much for Little Johnny, who said, "It's no use, Dad. The pieces are all the same size."

Friday, July 8, 2011

Prawn and Rice Salad with Coriander-Lemon Dressing Ingredients 10 cups of hot water 1 (3 1/2-ounce) boil-in-the-bag long-grain rice 1 1/2 pounds large prawns, peeled and deveined 3/4 cup finely chopped poblano chile (about 1 medium) 1/2 cup fresh coriander, coarsely chopped 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice 3/4 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper 1/8 teaspoon ground red pepper 2 tablespoons extravirgin olive oil 4 lemon wedges

Preparation Bring water to the boil in a large Dutch oven. Add bag of rice; cook 5 minutes. Add shrimp; return to the boil. Cook 5 minutes or until shrimp are done. Drain bag of rice and prawns; rinse with cold water. Drain.

Combine poblano and next 5 ingredients (through red pepper) in a large bowl. Open bag of rice.

Add rice and shrimp to poblano mixture; toss gently to combine.

Drizzle with oil, and toss gently to coat. Serve with lemon wedges.

Tommy Tam's Steamed Fish Makes 4 servings 1 whole sea bass (about 1&frac; pound, cleaned and scaled) or equivalent amount of tilapia or orange roughy fillets 4 spring onions, each cut in 4-inch pieces and then cut in quarters lengthwise ½ cup shredded fresh ginger Salt 4 tablespoons peanut oil Ÿ teaspoon ground white pepper Cook's notes: If you don't have a steaming setup, find a heavy heatproof plate to fit all the fish in one layer, and a pot that will hold it with room to lift it out. Set the plate inside the pot on something to raise it up, such as a small empty can with both ends removed.

Prepare the fish: Rinse the fish under cold running water and pat dry. Put half of the green parts of the spring onions and half the ginger on a plate and place the fish on top.

Smash the white parts of the scallions with the side of a cleaver blade and place them, along with remaining ginger, into the cavity of the fish. Sprinkle the fish with a little salt.

Steam the fish: Steam the fish above an inch of water over high heat, covered tightly, for about 8-15 minutes for a whole fish or about 5 minutes for a fillet. If a chopstick slides easily into the fleshiest part of the fish, it is done.

Make the hot oil: Shortly before the fish is done, heat the remaining 2 tablespoons oil until really hot.

Presentation: Carefully remove the plate from the steamer, scatter the remaining scallion greens over the fish, and then drizzle with the sizzling hot oil. Dust with white pepper.

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Friday, July 8, 2011

THE EYES HAVE IT!

SUMMER has arrived - and so have all the scary fashion make-up palettes. Bright green, sunshine yellow, vivid orange, Aunt Sally cheek pink and turquoise blue....arrghhh!!!!

Don’t worry, girls, I am here to help you through this oddest of trends. There is, I promise you, an easy way to wear these neons. The best way to start is to pick your favourite. We all see colours on the make-up counters of our local department stores and think, Id love to try that but I am too old or too nervous. We say we will stick to our Lulu ’60s blue eyeshadow or our boring ’70s neutrals. Not any more - were going into 2012 with a bang!

I have been a make-up artist for 23 years and have seen new colours come and go. The way I deal with this is to choose just one that I really like out of the many the make-up companies throw at us and go from there.

This season my colour of choice is bright jade green.

Please don’t pick lime green -it’s hideous on eyes and on nails it resembles a nasty fungal infection!

Jade green looks scrumptious on toes and fingers next to a golden Mediterranean tan. Try and treat yourself to inner and blend gently with a a good-quality green eyeshasmall soft brush. Lashings of dow.

If you wet it slightly and black mascara finish the look with a slim eyeshadow and voila...a trend-setting brush-stroke it along your goddess!

Green is best for you blue upper lash line and half way under your eye from outer to or brown eye girls. Don’t

By HAYLEY BECKMAN

HAYLEY, who qualified as a make-up artist and aesthetician in 1989, runs her own beauty salon in Manchester, England. Married with two daughters, she is a keen observer of all aspects of the beauty industry.

Out of the shadows: Tips for the summer always think that if your eyes are blue, then blue shadow is best or brown shadow with brown eyes. This is a misconception.

Try using something different and see how much it makes your eyes stand out.

For example, green and blue eyes look stunning with golds and bronzes. They make your eyes pop and sparkle and let your true colour shine through.

Routine Oranges are another colour that are easy to work into your routine. Juicy orange lipgloss or lip stain a la Katy Perry or Alesha Dixon is sensational. Especially on brunettes.

Zingy orange polish on fingers and toes is a good wa y to bring summer citrus colours into your day. These colours are bang on trend.

Orangy/peachy blusher is very pretty on cheeks, too.

Application is key. Smile a big cheesy grin into your

a pink tone irridescent lipgloss for a wash of colour and a perfect pout. If the pink you choose has slight blue tones in it, rather than peach it will make your teeth appear whiter. Clinique do a stay-on lipgloss in several pink tones . It's a little pricey but lasts for hours. Body Shop have a gorgeous hi-shine lip treatment gloss in mauve dream.

It's my favourite lip gloss and smells of mango but treats your lips at the same time as glossing them. I always use it on my clients, too, plus it's not tested on animals which is an added bonus.

Yellow next. I know - it frightens the life out of me too. This colour is best kept for toenails. You beautiful pale-skinned ladies should avoid this colour as it washes you out.

Mediterranean. When in Spain let's bring azure blue into our make-up bags .

Blues are divine on your eyes (not you, blue-eyed girls - remember to stick to greens or golds!).

Eyeliners are all the rage.

They come in a pick and mix of vivid colours. Use that black or brown liner that most of you will already own under your eyes half way from the outer corner and also on the top of your upper lashes.

Take your bright eyeliner colour of choice and apply on the inside corner of each eye, top and bottom, joining it to your dark liner already applied. Blend gently with a soft eyeliner brush.

Blend

The bright colour will open up your eyes and make them mirror. This should make the sparkle. Again, don't forget a apples of your cheeks progood waterproof black or trude.

But with a Costa Blanca brown mascara. Hot weather Take a large blusher/pow- bronze tan it looks fab. The and mascara aren’t always a der brush and apply in a cir- nicest thing to see is a pretty good combination so when cular motion over the apple pair of flip-flops and a bright able, try to pick up waterproof your cheek and slowly up acid-colour nail enamel pee- of make-up. to the hairline along your king out. It makes me smile Unless it's navy blue, try to cheekbone. ...and being outrageous is stay away from coloured Apply a minimal amount to fun. mascaras . I hate them with a your brush or you may end Last but not least, turquoi- passion. Purple especially up resembling Boy George se blue - the colour of the looks like eyelashes have Karma his in gone mouldy. Let's leave Chameleon days. them in the ‘80s, hey!

Not attractive!

Always remember the Electric fuchsia golden rule - less is pinks are all the more. These colours are rage these coming not for the faint-hearted few months . Pink and boring amongst us. always makes the There is no reason boys wink, ha ha! why a small amount Please, please applied in a liberal way unless you’re under can't brighten up your 21, don’t put matt day. Plus we all want to bright pink lipstick give Cheryl Cole a run for on your mouth. We her money in the fashion do not want to stakes and this is a great resemble a middleway to do it. aged Lady Gaga Have fun and go mad. now, do we?

It's never done me any Alesha Dixon: Juicy orange lipgloss Instead, choose harm!

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Friday, July 8, 2011

ARE YOU BALANCED? TAKING a well balanced and healthy diet is very essential. If the food is right, it keeps the body fit and healthy, even in one's old age! A balanced diet ensures that the important organs of the body such as brain and heart function well. These days, due to the lack of time, people often resort to eating foods that are easily available, which may not necessarily be healthy. Fast foods, high sugar foods and packaged foods, if taken every day, can contribute to many lifestyle diseases such as obesity, heart disease and even cancer! That's why, it is important for people to improve upon their diet, so that they can lead a disease-free, healthy and happy life.

Tips on How to Improve Your Diet • Water aids in digestion, flushes out the toxins from your body and at the same time, suppresses hunger pangs. So, drink a gallon everyday to enjoy these benefits and to keep the body hydrated.

• Do not skip your breakfast. It should be the healthiest meal of the day as it supplies the body with energy to carry out various physical activities throughout the day. Cereals, low fat milk and mixed fruit salad is the ideal breakfast.

• Take the dinner two hours prior to sleeping and also, take a light dinner. This will ensure that the food gets digested easily and does not cause fats to accumulate in the body.

• One of the steps to improve your diet is to take five to six small meals in a day, instead of three big meals. This will keep you away from snacking on unhealthy chips and fast foods in-between meals. It will bring down your overall food intake too, thus helping you to maintain the right weight.

• Include lots of fruits and vegetables in your healthy balanced diet. Fruits and vegetables, compared to other foods, are lesser in calories and high in nutrients, vitamins and minerals. They will keep your body healthy, at the same time; ensure that you do not gain weight.

• Include lean meats, egg and fish in your diet as they supply the body with proteins, which are very essential for building muscles.

• Complex carbohydrates such as those found in wholegrain breads, brown rice and potato are a must-have in daily

healthy diet menu as they energize the body, without causing it to gain weight.

• One of the important ways to improve your diet is by giving up on unhealthy, fatty foods and beverages, such as, pizzas, burgers, soft drinks, alcohol, cakes and pastries.

• Do not give up on fats altogether. Instead, meet the fat requirements of your body by including healthy fats such as those found in olive oil and fish, in your diet.

• Minimize the intake of processed or packaged foods as these are not as healthy as fresh foods and contain certain harmful chemicals too, which can have negative repercussions on the body.

• Choose healthy snacks. Nuts, almonds, low fat yogurt and fruits make for some good snacks items. So, keep them in your bag at all times. This will check your tendency to snack on unhealthy foods.

• Use salt and sugar sparsely while you cook meals. Use iodized salt in small quantity so that you do not suffer from iodine deficiency.

Another alternative is to season your foods with herbs instead of with salt. As for sugar, you can use honey and stevia in its place as they add lesser calories to the body and taste almost the same.

• Limit the intake of caffeine beverages such as tea and coffee. Two to three cups is more than enough or if possible, switch to herbal tea or green tea. Caffeine hampers the absorption of many essential nutrients such as iron, if taken immediately after a meal. So, for those who want to know, "how to improve your diet nutrition?” an important tip is to not take any caffeine beverage, within two hours of after having a meal.

• If you are prone to emotional eating i.e. eating high-fat and high-sugar foods to make yourself feel good, one of the healthy diet tips is to control your stress levels by undertaking stress-management techniques such as yoga, meditation or breathing exercises every day.

Even if they are done for ten minutes, these can elevate your mood and stop you from binge eating caused by stress.

For a fit body, along with eating a balanced diet, exercising everyday is essential too. So, make a routine of undertaking cardiovascular exercises such as running, cycling, swimming, dancing or aerobics every day. Combine these with flexibility, resistance training and weight training exercising and you will have the fittest, toned and healthiest body!

BRIGHT AND BEAUTY-FULL!

Emma’s salon is the real business.

EMMA’S Hair and Beauty Jennifer provides manicures Salon opened last September and pedicures and has and is set in a nice location recently trained in SHELLAC with easy parking. nails.

Based in El Limonar, Emma And Stacey, who has recently set up the salon after friends joined the salon after leaving and contacts from her time school at Easter, is training to working elsewhere suggested be a Hairdresser. She meets she opened her own busiand greets customers and ness. shampoos the clients – a They wanted Hair, Beauty and treatment which includes a Nail treatments at realistic head massage. prices they could afford when From July 11 to 23, Emma's the recession hit.

Salon has most treatments on Emma, who is originally from a special offer of just 10 Brighton, went straight into euros. (See advert). Loyalty Jennifer,Emma,Lucy and Stacey hairdressing on leaving Cards are also available, school and has now been in offering clients a treatment of the business for 16 years. Her forte is that she listens to her their choice at half-price on their sixth visit to the salon. clients, makes them feel important and provides valuable For more information on prices and treatments available at professional advice where appropriate.

Emma's Hair and Beauty Salon, see Facebook on the El Emma's salon has gone from strength to strength, so much Limonar Website. Meanwhile, Emma would like to thank her so that she has taken on three other members of staff. staff and all her customers for their loyalty and support.

Lucy, her Beautician, has also been in the business 16 years For you ladies and gents seeking the treatment of your and provides excellent beauty and massage treatments in a choice in a relaxed and friendly atmosphere, a visit to relaxed and friendly atmosphere.

Emma's Hair and Beauty Salon in El Limonar is a must!

HOW FEAR AFFECTS OUR HEALTH

WHAT IS FEAR

We all face fears in our lives, just turning on the TV, or reading the news paper viewing world events, we have fear such as asking someone out on a date, an interview for a new job, our health, or even dying Fear is a chain reaction in the brain ending with the release of chemicals into the body causing a racing heart, increased breathing, widened pupils etc. Our brain is a profoundly complex organ, made up of over 100 billion cells. Its activities are either conscious or ‘automatic’ also know as autonomic. Fear is almost entirely an autonomic response in the sense that we don’t consciously trigger it, or even know what’s going on until it has run its course. Even though it may seem that fear is an undesirable emotion, it is still a very important emotion for keeping us out of danger. When the brain creates the fear response, there are 2 different paths that are taken. The first path is called the low road. The low road is fast, but does not take any other factor into consideration. It tells the brain to take no chances. The second path is called the high road and is a more logical and rational path. Here the brain considers all options, and decides if there is need for fear.

THE EFFECTS OF FEAR Regardless of which path fear takes, low or high, it leads to the hypothalamus, the portion of the brain that controls the ancient survival reaction called the fight or flight response. During this instinctive response, energy is diverted away from general maintenance to deal with the danger. Hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline flood the body, increasing heart rate, blood pressure, sugar levels for fuel, and diverting blood to major muscle groups in the arms and legs for fight or flight. At the same time essential bodily functions such as reproduction and digestion that are not particularly useful in an emergency situation are temporarily slowed down.

The human body’s response to fear or stress is exactly the same whether a threat is real or imagined.

It then follows that when our fear or stress response system is activated so often, the body is not given a chance to return to normal. Scientific research has confirmed that prolonged high levels of cortisol can damage the heart, contribute to obesity, and weaken the immune system. Further negative implications include high levels of cholesterol, reduced bone density and depression.

WHAT TO DO If you have any fears, you have to first become aware of their existence or source, and get to know them. There is a great expression “Feel the fear but do it anyway!”

Facing your fears is the only way to combat them, each time you face up to your fears, you realise that they were just thoughts, thoughts that can be overcome, not only that, you realise your true strengths, your capabilities, and who you really are!

If you are facing fears which are debilitating, you need to seek professional help.

Dr Machi Mannu is a neuro-repatterning Specialist.

28

Friday, July 8, 2011

COURIER GUIDE TO THE SEVEN BEST CITY CARS

Cars and cities don’t mix well but if a bicycle or railcard doesn't work for you, several manufacturers offer a choice of cheeky, nippy motors that will at least make all that time spent traffic jamming vaguely tolerable; here are SEVEN of the best. They‘re all good for the occasional out-of-town journey and you may even turn a few heads as well

Smart For Two - Smarts have been around for eleven years now. This second-generation version is slightly bigger than the first; that means it offers a surprising amount of luggage space, but makes parking nose-in to the kerb, the original Smart's party trick, slightly more problematic. A new diesel and a planned electric version promise to make the Smart even cheaper to run.

BMW Mini - Much bigger and heavier than the 1959 version, but just as stylish. BMW's great achievement was to capture the cheeky character and darty road behaviour of the original in a car that has German standards of build quality. For more space, go for the Clubman, for more pace, the Cooper, or the even zippier John Cooper Works version.

Toyota iQ - Claimed to be the world's shortest four-seater, the iQ works better for three, but represents a remarkable achievement, nevertheless. Toyota's own Aygo is cheaper and roomier but the iQ scores heavily with its luxurious cabin; think of it as a mini-Lexus without the stodgy middle-aged overtones.

Kia Picanto - A far more significant car than it looks - the first Korean runabout to sell on character and desirability, rather than just price and running costs. That was thanks not just to a clever TV advertising but the qualities of the Picanto itself.

The later arrival of the impressive cee'd and Soul further up Kia's range proved that this car wasn't a flash in the pan but the first of a wave of impressive new products from this Korean manufacturer.

Mitsubishi i - The Mitsubishi i has a similar compact rearengined layout to the Smart but combines this with a larger four-door body to offer an impressive blend of space, economy and manoeuvrability. The forthcoming electric version promises to win more new fans for Mitsubishi's baby.

Suzuki Alto - Like Fiat, Suzuki specialises in small cars, so there's plenty of choice here. The Alto is the newest and the smallest but the Splash and the Swift are short and nippy too.

If all cars are too big for your journeys in town, Suzuki can do you a motorbike or a scooter capable of squeezing through the smallest gaps instead.

Ford Ka - This new Ka doesn't quite have the character of the old one - in fact it's difficult to tell it apart from its bigger brother the Fiesta.

Ford seems to have missed an obvious opportunity to establish Ka as a separate city car brand along the lines of Mini or Smart by integrating this car more tightly into the Ford range. That said, it's still a pretty car that cuts a bit of a dash around town.

29

Friday, July 8, 2011

SOME DRIVING FEET! David, 33, still on course for unique test pass

HANDICAPPED David Rivas, from Madrid, wants to become the first European to pass his driving test using only his FEET. On Tuesday, however, the 33 yearold failed his first test attempt in a specially adapted vehicle which allows him to control the car with an extra lever for his left foot, while the right is free for breaking and accelerating.

He intends to repeat the practical exam next week and hopes tobecome the first European to get his driving licence in this way.

David was born without a right arm, and with a very small and weak left one. He told the EFE news agency that he never thought he'd be able to drive, until a year ago he found out about the driving school in Basauri which is driven with a lever instead of a steering wheel.

‘I’ve always been made about cars, ever since I was small', he said. He took a month’s leave from his job in a call centre to attend the driving school an average of nearly ten hours a day.

Today a mistake at a give way junction saw him fail. But he’ll be back.

80,000 reasons F1 is so popular HERE are some things you may or may not know about Formula 1 racing; what goes on behind the scenes - in the pit, on the track and in the body of the driver...

An F1 car is made up of 80,000 components; if it were assembled 99.9% correctly, it would still start the race with 80 things wrong!

An F1 car can go from 0 to 160 kph AND back to 0 in FOUR seconds!

F1 car engines last only for about two hours of racing mostly before blowing up. On the other hand we expect our engines to last us for a decent 20 years on an average and they quite faithfully DO....that’s the extent to which the engines are pushed to perform...

An average F1 driver loses about 4kg of weight after just one race due to the prolonged exposure to high G forces

and temperatures for little over an hour (Yeah that’s right!)

At 550kg a F1 car is less than half the weight of a Mini.

To give you an idea of just how important aerodynamic design and added down force can be, small planes can take off at slower speeds than F1 cars travel on the track.

Without aerodynamic down force, high-performance racing cars have sufficient power to produce wheel spin and loss of control at 160 kph. They usually race at over 300 kph.

On a street course race like the Monaco Grand Prix, the down force provides enough suction to lift manhole covers.

Before the race all of the manhole covers on the streets have to be welded down to prevent this from happening!

The refuellers used in F1 can supply 12 litres of fuel per second. This means it would take just four seconds to fill the tank of an average 50 litre family car. They use the same refuelling rigs used on US military helicopters today.

Top F1 pit crews can refuel and change tyres in around

three seconds. It took me eight seconds to read above point.

During the race the tyres lose weight! Each tyre loses about 0.5 kg in weight due to wear.

Normal tyres last 60 000-100 000 km. Racing tyres are designed to last 90-120 km.

30

Friday, July 8, 2011

Stetsons & Petticoats are tops at the treble THIS week I want to tell you about a great show that is just starting up. It features two artists that have joined forces to create ‘Stetsons & Petticoats’ Christine King and Red Strokes are both well known as stars within the country music scene on the Costa Calida and Costa Blanca and have decided to work together to create tribute shows that will appeal to all tastes in music.

Mazarron-based Christine appears all over the Costa Calida, and has recently made her first successful appearance on Spanish television. Her soft, gentle voice is perfect for country ballads and also for a wide spectrum of music. She has been singing for more years than she cares to remember, in duos as well as solo, and even fronted a six-

piece band back in the UK. Red Strokes, recently moved to Spain, works primarily on the Costa Blanca. A favourite with many country line dancers and Garth Brookes fans, he appeared in the Marjal Country Music Fiesta.

Before moving to Spain, Red worked all over the UK under the stage name Charles Prince. He was a solo artist and a support act for Alexis Korner and more latterly a Beatles tribute act.

Together, ‘Stetsons & Petticoats’ offer three different themed shows…

1. THE KINGS AND QUEENS OF COUNTRY: Featuring the music of Garth Brookes, Shania Twain, Dolly Parton plus many others. This is a show that covers all genres of country music from the fifties up to date and ends with a ‘country dance’ music section.

THE LAS VEGAS TRIBUTE SHOW: Based on the Las Vegas Legends Show, which is currently running in Vegas and other American cities. The show is always different with tributes to a variety of stars including Neil Diamond, Dusty Springfield, Barbra Streisand, Shirley Bassey, Cher and Elvis. The list is almost endless so expect a different show each time you come - plus an unexpected star to close

the show.

THE ROCK ‘N ROLL IS KING SHOW: The inspiration for this show comes from the Fifties, when rock ‘n roll ruled. Expect to hear some old favourites and some more recent music as well.

This is a trip down memory lane with Cliff, The Ronettes, Buddy Holly, Brenda Lee, Bill Haley and many more.

These are all great shows and Christine and Red are also both booked to appear at the Pulpie Country Music festival near Agilas in October. This is expected to be a major fiesta in the area featuring 15 or so other international recording artists. So keep an eye out in the gig guide as to where you can catch them.

Also this weekend if you fancy something completely different and new to the area, get down to Flannigan’s tonight (Friday) and see Roxy Hurt, the act from Las Vegas that everyone is talking about .She will be putting on a fantastic Burlesque Show starting at 10.30pm.

Well, that’s it for this week. If you’re a bar or an entertainer and want to appear in the gig guide or have any events coming up, then please contact me by email on mandy@starsinbars.org or call me on 685302529, or just visit my website www.starsinbars.org

Mandy

DATE

VENUE

ACT/ EVENT

OTHER INFO

FRIDAY 8th

Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Villorians in Rojales Flannigans in Cabo Roig Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Arches in Los Alcazares Clapton’s in Quesada Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Lodosol in San Pedro Bar Roca in Balsicas Arches in Los Alcazares Bar Vitto in El Mojon Lo Marabu in Dona Pepa Pals in La Siesta Flannigans in Cabo Roig

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Lynden B Roxy Hurt J.J Soulman Rupert Rock n Roll Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke Cabaroke with Davy Jones Matt Christian Jimmy Mac Lynden B Kye Jaymes Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke J.J Soulman Disco/ Karaoke with DJ Jay

Starting at 10pm Comedy Show Starting at 10.30pm

Pablo’s International bar in La Florida Snug Bar in Torre de la Horredada Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjas Casa Ventura in San Luis Billy’s Bar in El Chaparral Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Flannigan’s in Cabo Roig Lo Marabu in Dona Pepa

Starting at 8pm Comedy Show

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjas Montes Bar in Los Montesinos Restaurant La Boca in Playa Los Locos Billy’s Bar in El Chaparral The Arches in Los Alcazares Flannigans in Cabo Roig Bar Sioux in Gran Alicant Asturias in Punta Prima

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Lynden B Cabaroke with Matt Christian Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Karaoke with Dodgy Div Stevie Spit Andy McBride Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke B4 B.J Bluesman Magician J.J Soulman Steve Dale Mark Bailey Kens Quiz Quiz night with Darren James Karaoke with Ruby Blues Karo The Blues Sista’s Ern E King Crazy Bingo with Spike Fun Music Quiz B.J Bluesman Chilli-oke with Peter Jay Maria O’Hara Curtis Samantha Curtis Stetsons & Petticoats

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjas Sisoma Romana in Dona Pepa The Priory in El Galan Flannigan’s in Cabo Roig Bobby’s Bar in Quesada Malino Bar in La Zenia La Rustika in Torrevieja

Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Tony Lincoln Lenny Mitchell Stevie Spit Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke Ern E King Stetsons & Petticoats

SATURDAY 9th

SUNDAY 10th

MONDAY 11th

TUESDAY 12th

WEDNESDAY 13th

THURSDAY 14th

Flannigan’s in Cabo Roig Chicken Shack in San Luis Diablo’s in Cabo Roig El Mundo in Benimar Arches in Los Alcazares Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Inn at the green in Entre Naranjas Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Flannigans in Cabo Roig Square Bar in Cabo de Palos

Starting at 10pm

Comedy Show

Starting at 10.30pm

Starting at 5pm Starting at 5pm & BBQ Comedy Drag Show Starting at 10.30pm Starting at 6pm Live band starting at 10.30pm

Michael Buble Tribute Starting at 9pm

Starting at 10.30pm Starting at 4pm Starting at 9pm

Starting at 10.30pm Starting at 10pm

Starting at 9.30pm Comedy Drag Show

31

Friday, July 8, 2011

HOT GOSSIP Beyonce - a first for Glastonbury Well, R&B Queen and soon to be actress on the Big screen Beyonce is certainly centre of attention at the moment. Last week she was shocked to discover that she was the first EVER female to headline on the pyramid stage at Glastonbury. And boy, did she go down a treat as she rocked the crowd with classics such as ´Crazy´ and ´single ladies´ as well as some brand new tunes off her new album ´4´ . The on independence day this week, she celebrated by performing on a floating stage near the statue of Liberty. (As one does) There, she sang her new single ´The best thing I never had´ for a group of fans and some Navy cadets and then followed it up with a rendition of ´God bless the USA´.

Meanwhile, poor old Pete Doherty is said to be facing another prison sentence after allegedly breaking into a shop and robbing the contents in Regensburg, Germany earlier this year The owners of the music shop, from which The Libertines singer allegedly stole a guitar and record, are said to be pressing charges against him. Doherty has admitted to smashing the shop window, but says he doesn’t remember stealing anything, as he was very drunk at the time.

TKO Gold presenters We thought it was about time that you met our TKO Gold DJs face to face, the one´s who make you laugh and cry and dare we say it, sometimes cringe at! And what better way to start but with Breakfast show host Chris Ashley ! Our Ex BBC and Talk radio presenter wakes you up in the morning with his dulcet tones and great music. He can be rather daft and you can join in the fun by calling him on the studio phone. You can join Chris every week day morning from 8am till 11 and Saturday mornings 9am till 12pm. Also join Chris with The Courier pop quiz every Monday morning for your chance to win a meal for two at Quesada Fish and Chips.

you tips on how this ancient system of aesthetics can change your life.

Our next TKO Gold DJ is another ex BBC presenter Alex Trellinski. His Golden Lunch show is from 11am until 2pm every week day. This is a show full of ´Feel Good´tunes and musical memories and Alex invites his friends from around the world to bring you the inside track on all the latest news. On Monday´s, Paul Smith from ´soaplife´magazine gives you all the soap gossip, Tuesday´s coming live and direct from Los Angeles, top showbiz reporter Linda Harris has all the Hollywood gossip and Friday´s sees Paul Darby ´The Feng Shui Doctor´ bringing

Next up on the TKO Gold agenda is Dave Knights with his Sundowners show. Dave is vibrant and fun loving and he loves to tease you with his compitions and feelgood music !! He is on air from 6pm until 9pm every weekday evening.

He loves to chat with you on the phone and you certanly keep him busy! Sundowners is the perfect cocktail every single evening.

Our next DJ of the day is the one and only Darren James. You can catch him between 2pm and 6pm for a civilised and sophisticated four hours, every weekday afternoon.

Our Darren plays music of the widest variety, of both established and contemporary Easy listening, middle of the road music from Frank Sinatra to Will Young. Darren is notorious for his competitions and Spanish Lottery results. The history of UK number ones, tomorrows news and much much more.

Next week we´ll be finding out all about our TKO Gold weekenders.

WIN A MEAL FOR TWO AND WINE AT QUESADA FISH & CHIPS POP QUIZ July 8 1 Shy church girl who sent pulses racing with Í feel love and Hot stuff? DONNA SUMMER 2 Folk rock band who became a musical sensation in 1971 with a Horse with no name? AMERICA 3 A hit for Amy Winehouse and The Zutons? VALERIE 4 The original Blockheads singer. IAN DURY 5 Don´t stop the what? By Roxy music. DANCE 6 Charles Hardin Holley. BUDDY HOLLY 7 Where was the house of the rising sun? New ________? ORLEANS 8 Where did Frankie´s two tribes go to? WAR 9 Who´s got a lust for life? IGGY POP 10 They had Friday on their mind. EASYBEATS FIND THE KEY WORD AND TO TAKE PART LISTEN TO CHRIS ASHLEY'S SHOW ON TKO GOLD, SATURDAY MORNINGS, 9am to 12 noon CHRIS WILL ASK YOU TO TEXT OR EMAIL THE KEY WORD AND THIS WEEK’S WINNING ANSWER WILL BE ANNOUNCED.

32

Friday, July 8, 2011

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week's puzzle, 23 represents D and 2 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

In this week’s Quickie crossword, all the answers are ANAGRAMS of the clue words: Across 1 Scots (5) 4 Please (6) 9 Toe-rags (7) 10 Lease (5) 11 Isle (4) 12 Presume (7) 13 Act (3) 14 Ache (4) 16 Neon (4) 18 Gut (3) 20 Recital (7) 21 Acre (4) 24 Super (5) 25 Cashing (7) 26 Led set (6) 27 Slept (5)

Down 1 Cleats (6) 2 Hones (5) 3 Pals (4) 5 Peelings (8) 6 Nearest (7) 7 Up dell (6) 8 Stale (5) 13 Check-ins (8) 15 Treadle (7) 17 Maples (6) 18 Cheat (5) 19 Eighth (6) 22 Aides (5) 23 Spat (4)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Threads, 5 Super, 8 Night, 9 Unicorn, 10 Searching, 12 Use, 13 Scared, 14 Orbits, 17 Art, 18 Moonlight, 20 Precise, 21 Thorn, 23 Dates, 24 Sadness.

Down: 1 Tanks, 2 Rag, 3 Article, 4 Studio, 5 Swing, 6 Producing, 7 Runners, 11 Apartment, 13 Stamped, 15 Related, 16 Models, 18 Maids, 19 Tends, 22 Owe.

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Hear tinsel unravelling (6) 4 Invent lipstick say? (42) 9 Less salubrious fish I chase with little hesitation (7) 10 Gather together for a church service (5) 11 Choose the Spanish middle selection (5) 12 Being spotlessly clean is unproductive (7) 13 End a hundred works in a secretive manner (11) 18 Badly nips ARP plant (7) 20 Lad in key note clearing (5) 22 Knowing there’s a conflict to the East (5) 23 Nobleman with award for part of listener (7) 24 Notice signal to stop and get angry (3,3) 25 Cuddle scares awfully (6)

Down 1 A terrible hassle for whips (6) 2 Criticise traditional roofing material (5) 3 A letter from Paul, sleep it off (7) 5 A byword for a commercial age (5) 6 Spain’s victory, as I’ve read is hard to pin down (7) 7 Went ahead and gave to (6) 8 Squealer knits her Pop a small jumper (11) 14 Tell the story about near rat (7) 15 I regain disputed African country (7) 16 The odds against listeners having weapons (6) 17 Discourages the desert construction (6) 19 She’s relatively nice out East (5) 21 Quarters a sailor and a poem (5)

STANDARD CLUES

Down 1 Beats severely (6) 2 Roofing material (5) 3 Missive (7) 5 Saying (5) 6 Hard to pin down (7) 7 Approved (6) 8 Plant-eating insect (11) 14 Recount (7) 15 African country (7) 16 Javelins (6) 17 Discourages (6) 19 Female relative (5) 21 Home (5)

Across 1 Pay attention (6) 4 Cosmetics (4-2) 9 More shifty (7) 10 Accumulate (5) 11 Choose by ballot (5) 12 Germ-free (7) 13 Sneaky (11) 18 Edible root (7) 20 Forest clearing (5) 22 Conscious (5) 23 Earring holder (7) 24 Become angry (3,3) 25 Stroke (6)

Last weeks Solution Across: 7 Repair, 8 Uproar, 9 Bite, 10 Intrepid, 11 Encores, 13 Yacht, 15 Women, 17 Reddish, 20 Tabulate, 21 Plug, 22 Sirens, 23 Iberia.

Down: 1 Resign, 2 Lace, 3 Praised, 4 Gusto, 5 Freehand, 6 Radish, 12 Overused, 14 Heretic, 16 Okapis, 18 Stupid, 19 Balsa, 21 Peep.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words Not Am Ray An Sat At Sea Do See Go Set Ma Tea Of Tee Up 4 letter words 3 letter words Afar Era Edge Gun Gear Hen Laos Net Lien

Load Mate Onus Opal Pros Rags Rank Sage Same Sand Sane Scum Tame Tank

Task 5 letter words Heart Sense Tacky Taint 7 letter words Agonise Atomise Knights Neither

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Anxiety (8) 7 Sour (f) (5) 8 Religioso (9) 9 Guerra (3) 10 Vela (náutico) (4) 11 Pedestrian (6) 13 Pantalla (6) 14 Cheap (6) 17 Escaso (6) 18 Días (4) 20 El (3) 22 Educación (9) 23 Estrellas (5) 24 Catalogue (8)

Down 1 Behind (at the back) (5) 2 Soldado (7) 3 Huevos (4) 4 To take in (receive) (6) 5 Marrón (5) 6 Richer (3,4) 7 Cenicero (7) 12 Pear trees (7) 13 El más blando (7) 15 Fan (air) (7) 16 Heater (6) 17 Mushrooms (flattopped) (5) 19 Saint (5) 21 Broad bean (4)

33

Friday, July 8, 2011 Across 1 Which town in Virginia was the site of both the last (October, 1781) battle of the American Revolution and a Civil War battle (1862)? (8) 7 See 4 Down 8 Which type of personal computer shares its name with a full-length waterproof coat? (9) 9 Which small town in eastern Belgium has been celebrated since medieval times for the curative properties of its mineral springs? (3) 10 What is the Scottish name for a turnip? (4) 11 Derived from the Sioux word for ‘dwelling’, what is the name of the conical tent made of skins, cloth, or canvas on a frame of poles, used by American Indians? (6) 13/14 Who was president of Palestine from 1996 to 2004?

(6,6) 17 Which word means ‘to evoke or draw out a response from someone in reaction to one’s own actions or questions’? (6) 18 What is the Scottish word for a steep bank or hillside?

(4) 20 Which word can describe a university teacher, a Spanish gentleman or a high-ranking member of the Mafia?

(3) 22 Which city was, until 1974, the county town and administrative centre of Lancashire? (9) 23 Which cookery term means ‘to fry quickly in a little hot fat’? (5) 24 The ‘Velvet Fog’ was the nickname of which American

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

singer, whose only UK Top 10 hit single was Mountain Greenery in 1956? (3,5) Down 1 Which country situated at the south-western corner of the Arabian Peninsula was formed in 1990? (5)

2 Which childhood disease is caused by a deficiency of vitamin D and sunlight? (7) 3 What name is given to a prong on a fork or antler? (4) 4/7A What name is given to a real or imaginary prize given in fun to a person coming last in a race or competition?

(6,5) 5 What name is often applied to a small group of trees? (5) 6 Which medical word that means ‘a small localised area of dead tissue resulting from failure of blood supply’, comes from the Latin word for ‘to stuff’? (7) 7 What was the surname of the first US astronaut to travel in space? (7) 12 Which city is the capital of autonomous community of Andalusia? (7) 13 Which language, used by Jews in central and eastern Europe before the Holocaust, was originally a German dialect with words from Hebrew and several modern languages? (7) 15 Edward Morgan were the first names of which famous English author, whose works include Howards End and A Passage to India? (7) 16 What is the name of Mickey Mouse’s girlfriend? (6) 17 Which word describes ‘a feeling of listlessness and dissatisfaction arising from a lack of occupation or excitement’? (5) 19 Which word is suggestive of being strange and frightening? (5) 21 Lionel who wrote the musicals Fings Ain’t Wot They Used T’Be and Oliver? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH La Cara - The Face Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

1. el pelo, 2. la piel,

16. la arruga, 17.l a peca,

k. jaw, l. wrinkle, m. cheek,

3. la ceja, 4. la pestaña,

18. el poro, 19. el hoyuelo,

n. skin, o. mouth, p. mole,

5. la oreja, 6. la nariz,

20. el parpado.

q. temple, r. lip, s. nose,

food and drink QUIZ 1. What is the main vegetable ingredient in the dish Borsht?

2. The phrase ‘mind your p’s and q’s’ originally meant to watch how much you had to drink, but what did the letters p & q stand for?

3. Which animal’s milk is used to make authentic Italian mozzarella cheese?

4. Which expensive vinegar is aged in wooden barrels?

5. What flavour is the liqueur Cointreau?

6. What cheese shares its name with an English Gorge?

7. The Korean soup ‘Poshintang’ is a popular item on summertime menus. What is it made from?

8. Which country produces 70% of the world's olive oil?

9. What is made with fermenting yeast and held in tanks for 2 months at 40 degrees?

10. What is a freshwater lobster called?

1. Beetroot 2. Pints & Quarts 3. Water buffalo 4.

Balsamic 5. Orange 6. Cheddar 7. Dogs 8. Greece 9.

Lager (accept beer at a pinch) 10. Crayfish - Crayfish live in freshwater rivers and streams in temperate climates

ANSWERS

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across:7 Norway, 8 Profit, 10 Sistine, 11 Shale, 12 Iron, 13 Thong, 17/18 Dodge City, 22 Ozone, 23 Epstein, 24 Stereo, 25 Verona.

Down: 1 Gnostic, 2 Preston, 3 Fagin, 4 Krishna, 5 Offal, 6 Otter, 9 Ted Hughes, 14 Lorelei, 15 Simenon, 16 Myanmar, 19 Sousa, 20 Coven, 21 Essex.

t. eyelash,

barbilla, 10. la frente,

a. hair, b. eye lid,

11. la sien, 12. el ojo,

c. forehead, d. eyebrow,

13. la mejilla, 14. la boca,

e. ear, f. dimple, g. freckle,

15. la mandíbula,

h. pore, i. chin. j. eye,

F S WB D C S A M T O Y D P X A I UP E A ÑL J I Z C P D S Z Z N J E A WA E B Z MA QD S P A K T J J GUOL I A UOF CA S R QA P B A L L I B RA B E Z MU T QH D B F K E D R V L S A B OOA J B RNI A MI R H L Z L P I E L T F T E RE Z I RE HI UU UE NUA CE P A RP A D I UY GZ I RA NNB OZ D O Z A L E F E Z O U WR HOA A B CHT CK QL F X A QZ QV OA K X X X U Soduko

Z O RX V O P U A N P O P A ML CL E I OJ OE J M OW OP

Span - Eng

Answers: 1a, 2n, 3d, 4t, 5e, 6s, 7p, 8r, 9i, 10c, 11q, 12j, 13m, 14º, 15k, 16l, 17g, 18h, 19f, 20b.

7. el lunar, 8. el labio, 9. la

ARRUGA

NARIZ

BARBILLA

OJO

BOCA

OREJA

CEJA

PARPADO

FRENTE

PECA

HOYUELO

PELO

LABIO

PESTAÑA

LUNAR

PIEL

MANDIBULA

PORO

MEJILLA

SIEN

Quizword

Fill It In

34

Friday, July 8, 2011

Horoscopes

By Pandora Aries March 21 - April 19

He doesn't wash

Hi Tia I love my partner dearly but I can't cope with his aversion to soap and water and clean clothing. He wasn't like this when I first knew him. He lives in my house and helps with the bills but I hate him being in my bed because quite frankly, he smells. The idea of sex with him is abhorrent for the same reason.

I've tried dropping hints and also just being direct but nothing works. I don't want to ask him to leave but I will have to if he can't respect me enough to spend 5 minutes a day in the shower. He has enough time to spend 4 hours a day in the pub when I'm at work. Any suggestions? Many thanks, SARAH Hello Sarah It's hard living with anyone whose personal hygiene isn't good enough.

It's not only offensive to the nose, it can be a health hazard and it can certainly spell death to intimacy.

You've tried to tackle this without a positive response from your partner.

You might try assertiveness once more: "I love you but right now I don't want to be close to you because you smell unpleasant. Please will you have a good wash and put some clean clothes on?" may do the trick.

Equally, it may not.

Alternatively you might ask him what the problem is because you can't help noticing he's been reluctant to have a shower and wear clean clothes.

Perhaps between the two of you, you can come up with a solution. This problem-solving approach could be viewed as supportive.

You could suggest having a sexy shower together. You could tell him on any given night, "I'd love to sleep with you on another occasion but right now I don't want to because you smell dirty. Will you sleep in the spare room/on the sofa tonight if you won't have a good wash?" And stick to your guns, politely but firmly.

Hope can solve nearly all of your problems today. Until tomorrow when all of your dreams will be dashed to pieces. The opportunities you once had are all but gone. Seize any new opportunity with all your might.

Seek advice from someone older today in order to avoid making a fool of yourself.

Taurus April 20 - May 20 There are definitely drawbacks to all your best laid plans. Be award that today might not be your lucky day. Are you loveable?

Take time out today to contemplate that thought and try to make sure that you are very loveable.

Gemini May 21 - June 20

If at the end of a week of these tactics he still hasn't addressed the issue constructively, you might give him an ultimatum. The fact that he regularly has time to spend hours in the pub could indicate someone with an alcohol problem, in which case if he's unwilling to sort it out, recognise that that's not about you but his addiction. No one can fix anyone else's drinking problems so either you could go to Al-Anon (www.al-anonuk.org.uk) for support in a relationship with someone who has a drink problem, or you could kick him into touch.

Good luck.

MUM WANTS TO INTERFERE Hello Tia Maria My family and friends have recently discovered that I am bulimic. My mum took me to see my doctor, who has referred me to a counsellor.

My mum wants to be present at these sessions as she feels my bulimia is her fault, but I don't feel comfortable talking about it with her, let alone in front of her. I don't want her to know the reasons why I do it. I have pushed myself away from my friends and have no one to talk to, and due to my extreme mood changes I have attempted suicide several times. I don't have the worst life, but I just don't know how to sort things out. Help me please?

LOUISE Hello Louise Well done for recognising that you've developed a problematic habit! You can overcome it and work

out how to address the emotional difficulties which led you to those self-destructive behaviours. That way you won't need to adopt bulimic behaviours or suicidal thoughts any more because you'll have learned good emotional management techniques that help you feel better about yourself and other people and your life.

In most cases the counsellor for a person with eating disorders will work only with that person, though at a time when the person is ready, they may invite the parent/s to a session or two. The counsellor will explain his or her ethical boundaries to you in the first session if you ask. These include their take on confidentiality. If you ask the counsellor not to include your mum in your therapy, I'm pretty sure that's what'll happen.

In a few cases, there may be a recommendation for some family therapy.

That's if the counsellor feels other family members' behaviour has had an input into your developing those unhelpful habits

around food. If so, sorting out their behaviours could be helpful to you in sorting out your own. Family therapy, however, is quite hard to come by so it isn't very likely.

Of course your mum cares about you and so feels guilty and responsible for your choices. But you're not responsible for her problems, though your behaviours will have some impact on her as well as on yourself.

Please be aware that bulimia isn't some germ that swoops in from outer space. It's a pattern of beliefs, thinking, feeling and behaving which you have developed. A set of habits which are intended to have a positive outcome but actually have painful consequences - but you can change the habits as you find more constructive ways of achieving your goals.

I wish you the courage to learn to love yourself in ways that help you because you matter. Good luck.

Tia

Relax, break out the medicines and pills, and get funkin'! You may be left to pick up the pieces of someone else's failures today. Your doctor will be able to diagnose your current problems far better than me. But only I can tell you that your broken heart will never heal.

NEVER. NEVER!!!

Cancer June 21 - July 22 Your favourite colour will today start to look a little different. You may feel like starving yourself today in order to lose some weight.

The way you dance around the office may cause some to question certain parts of your personal life.

Leo July 23 - August 22 If you think you've been harshly treated, please feel free to contact me or perhaps issue some kind of fatwa. Music is likely to help you through today, so try to listen to as much as possible.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Pull out of any prior engagements tonight as you are about to receive a special unexpected visitor. If you feel happy today, try to create something that reflects that happiness. Things are going to come to a head today and either go well, go badly, or go...kinda...OK.

Libra September 23 - October 22 Supper is something that comes to those who last out the day. You may be too tired, or otherwise incapacitated. Any time you feel restless this week, try to imagine what it would be like to take viagra and ritalin at the same time. Tantric is not a cuss-word you want to use around the office.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Cancelling a direct-debit may land you in hot water with an authority. Try to absorb plants into your skin in order to make yourself into some kind of Marvel Super Hero.

Subconsciously, you've always felt free to say and do what you want so today's countycourt judgement against you might affect your life in ways you hadn't considered.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 The night may feel like a safe time to parade naked through the local city streets, however, you may find there are some that oppose your freedom. The horse you received in the mail has a diamond-studded golden tooth.

Just thought I'd mention it.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 With all you've been through you should be glad that this week will actually come to a close. The week may start well, but fall into sharp decline later on Saturday. Your prejudices may lead you astray today and leave you requiring four or five stitches.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 The lights are on, nobody's home and it's time to download some porn off the internet.

Don't shun your naked body, express yourself in lots of new happy naked ways. It is tantalising to think that you may be the favourite person in your area. However, fame always leads to the embarrassing disclosure of old XXX tapes of you.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Many of the best lyrics are attributable today.

Take into consideration that most songs are about love and adversity. Your friends will suddenly start really loving you this week as they find out about your recent lottery luck.

Everything you are thinking about will end up getting lost in some sort of fuzzy logic.

35

Friday, July 8, 2011Friday, July 1, 2011

WHAT’S ON THE TELLY..?

If you must go indoors this week (escaping the heat maybe?) at least there’s a great line up on TV and with TV listings you’ll get to catch the best programmes all week!

Secrets of the Pop Song

Backdraft

Friday 08 July 10:35pm - 1:05am ITV1 London Director Ron Howard has become one of the most accomplished of Hollywood craftsmen, and this sturdy star-studded action drama was deservedly a mainstream hit. Kurt Russell and William Baldwin play the warring, firefighting brothers who have to cope with a rash of blazes started by a seemingly deranged arsonist, whose lethal "backdrafts" are resulting in death and destruction. The plot is hardly original, but Howard marshals the sprawling elements with great finesse and the fire footage, if harrowing at times, is genuinely exhilarating.

Saturday 09 July 9:45pm - 10:45pm BBC2 However talented an act might be, breaking into the charts can be one of the toughest obstacles on the road to recognition. Young soul singer Tawiah is joined by Guy Chambers, best known for several chart-toppers he penned with Robbie Williams, and Mark Ronson, the all-round musical maestro who collaborated so successfully with Amy Winehouse, as they try to come up with her debut hit. Neil Tennant, Boy George, Motown songwriter Lamont Dozier, producer Brian Higgins and Jessie J, who recently scored her own first number one, also have their say.

Top Gear

Philadelphia

Sunday 10 July 8:00pm - 9:00pm BBC2 Jeremy Clarkson and Richard Hammond find second-hand bargains for the same price as Britain's cheapest new car, the £6,995 Nissan Pixo. James May is in Nevada to test the toughness of the Range Rover Evoque, driving it through Death Valley before chauffeuring a megastar across Las Vegas. Plus, the McLaren MP4-12C is compared with its deadliest supercar rival, the Ferrari 458, and reigning Formula 1 world champion Sebastian Vettel is the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car.

Monday 11 July 10:00pm - 12:35am Channel 5 This affecting drama was the first major Hollywood movie about Aids, and it won Tom Hanks his (deserved) first best actor Oscar. Hanks plays homosexual lawyer Andrew Beckett, who takes his powerful employers to court for sacking him after they discover he is suffering from an Aids-related illness. Hanks portrays the ravaged, dying Beckett as a disabled everyman whose life has lessons for all of us, but does not disconnect the character from his cause

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36

Friday 8th July

00:35 This Week 01:25 Why Hate Junk Mail? Panorama 01:55 Countryfile 02:55 Britain's Next Big Thing 03:55 Fake Britain 04:40 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Britain's Bravest Cops 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Food Fighters 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Doctors 15:10 Only Fools and Horses 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Escape from Scorpion Island 17:25 Stuck on Sheep Mountain 17:55 Shaun the Sheep 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless Celebrities 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 The Good Cook 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 A Question of Sport 22:00 My Family 22:30 Miranda 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Graham Norton Show BBc2 00:20 Golf: The Scottish Open 01:20 BBC Samuel Johnson Prize for Non-Fiction 2011 02:20 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report

04:40 Close 07:00 Wibbly Pig 07:10 Dip Dap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales 07:45 Octonauts 07:55 Deadly 60 08:25 Sam & Mark's Guide to Dodging Disaster 08:35 The Scooby-Doo Show 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Trapped Ever After 09:30 Show Me Show Me 09:55 Bob the Builder 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Guess with Jess 10:30 Nina and the Neurons 10:45 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:50 Big Cook Little Cook 11:10 Little Charley Bear 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Flog It! 16:45 Antiques Road Trip 17:30 Weakest Link 18:15 Escape to the Country 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Railway Journeys 20:00 Hampton Court Palace Flower Show 2011 21:00 Gardeners' World 22:00 The Kennedys 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 Odd One In 01:20 The Zone 03:20 Meltdown on the Railways: Tonight 03:50 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Ten Mile Menu 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Dinner Date 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Love Your Garden 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Paul O'Grady Live 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight 23:35 Backdraft

DANGER: DIGGERS AT WORK New series. Documentary exploring the work carried out by employees at a digger-hire firm. In the first edition, a Boeing 747 aeroplane is broken down for scrap, and two drivers help battle a forest fire. A team also creates a fake beach along Regent Street in London, and one of the company's office workers receives a driving lesson.

00:45 4thought.tv 00:50 The Film Show 01:25 Style the Nation 01:50 Overtones 02:05 A Very Dangerous Doctor 03:30 Landlords from Hell 04:25 Hill Street Blues 05:20 One Tree Hill 06:05 Grudge Match 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 According to Jim 09:55 Friends 10:55 Country House Rescue 11:55 A Place in the Sun 12:55 Channel 4 Presents - David Clarke 2012 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Relocation: Phil Down Under 14:00 Channel 4 Racing 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Four in a Bed 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 Jamie's 30 Minute Meals 20:55 Channel 4 Presents - David Smith 2012 21:00 Come Dine with Me 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 22:30 King Of 23:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man

00:00 Police Interceptors 01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The Beeps 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Ebb and Flo 07:40 Olivia 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Bop Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Hana's Helpline 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Ladies of the House 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Fifth Gear 21:00 Danger: Diggers at Work 22:00 Castle 23:00 Law & Order 23:55 CSI: Miami

37

Saturday 9th July

00:20 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:30 Lord of War 02:20 The One Show 02:55 The Spice Trail 03:55 Louis Theroux: Miami Mega Jail 04:55 Newswatch 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Five Minutes With 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Our World 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 The Good Cook 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 13:10 Formula 1: The British Grand Prix Qualifying 15:40 Live Golf: The Scottish Open 18:20 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:40 Walk on the Wild Side 19:10 Total Wipeout 20:10 Tonight's the Night 21:10 The National Lottery: In It to Win It 22:00 Casualty 22:50 Lee Mack's All Star Cast 23:30 BBC News; Weather 23:50 Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow BBC2 00:00 00:50 01:50 03:35 07:00 07:10 07:15 07:30

The Review Show Golf: The Scottish Open Critical Assignment Close Wibbly Pig Dip Dap Pinky Dinky Doo Tinga Tinga Tales

07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Deadly 60 08:00 Leon 08:35 Arthur 09:00 Little Howard's Big Question 09:25 Prank Patrol Down Under 09:50 Dennis and Gnasher 10:05 Trade Your Way to the USA 10:30 Fee Fi Fo Yum 11:00 Mission: 2110 11:30 League of Super Evil 11:40 Wolverine and the X-Men 12:05 Mortified 12:25 OOglies 12:40 MOTD Kickabout 13:00 The Sky at Night 13:20 Homes Under the Hammer 13:50 Live Golf: The Scottish Open 15:40 Kramer vs Kramer 17:20 Comedy Connections 17:50 Life Beyond the Box: Norman Stanley Fletcher 18:40 Porridge 19:10 Flog It! 20:10 Dad's Army 20:40 Vincent Van Gogh: Painted with Words 22:00 Have I Got a Bit More News for You 22:45 Secrets of the Pop Song 23:45 Top of the Pops: The Story of 1976

02:05 The Zone 04:05 Doom 05:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 House Gift 10:25 Coronation Street 12:45 This Morning: Saturday 13:45 The Planet's Funniest Animals 14:45 ITV News and Weather 14:54 Meridian Weather 14:55 Agatha Christie's Thirteen at Dinner 16:55 Licence to Kill 19:15 Meridian News and Weather 19:30 ITV News and Weather 19:45 You've Been Framed!

20:15 Odd One In 21:00 Penn & Teller: Fool Us 22:00 The Marriage Ref 23:00 ITV News and Weather 23:14 Meridian Weather 23:15 Ocean's Twelve

TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT New series. John Barrowman returns with the entertainment show that makes dreams come true for members of the audience at home and in the studio. Queen of Country Dolly Parton gives one of her biggest fans a masterclass, a teaching assistant sings with the Wanted, and a DJ becomes Elvis for the night, joining the cast of hit musical Million Dollar Quartet.

00:05 The Big Bang Theory 01:05 4thought.tv 01:10 Mercury Prize Sessions 01:30 4play: Metronomy 01:45 The Album Chart Introduces: LMFAO 02:00 Hollyoaks Music Show 02:25 My Name Is Earl 03:10 The Real Housewives of New Jersey 04:05 Ugly Betty 05:40 One Tree Hill 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Film Show 08:00 British Formula 3 International Series 08:25 The Grid 08:55 The Morning Line 09:50 Friends 10:20 Hollyoaks Music Show 10:55 Smallville 11:50 Friends 12:20 Style the Nation 13:20 Dirty Sexy Things 14:20 The TV Book Club 14:55 Channel 4 Racing 17:05 Come Dine with Me 19:40 Channel 4 News 20:10 4thought.tv 20:15 The Simpsons Movie 22:00 Camelot 23:00 Gangs of New York

00:55 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 05:05 Motorsport Mundial 05:30 Fifth Gear 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 07:50 Elmo's World 08:05 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 08:20 Noddy in Toyland 08:30 Chiro 08:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:40 Hana's Helpline 08:55 Little Princess 09:05 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:40 Rupert Bear 09:55 Olivia 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:30 The Milkshake! Show 11:00 Pawn Stars 11:30 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 12:30 Danger: Diggers at Work 13:30 Rosamunde Pilcher's Summer 15:20 King Solomon's Mines 17:20 Random Hearts 19:55 5 News Weekend 20:00 Cricket 20:55 NCIS 21:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 22:50 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 23:45 CSI: NY

38

Sunday 10th July 00:35 Dark Water 02:15 BBC News 02:30 The Bottom Line 03:00 BBC News 03:30 HARDtalk 04:00 BBC News 04:30 Our World 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 The Record Europe 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 The Politics Show 12:00 Weather for the Week Ahead 13:10 Formula 1: The British Grand Prix Live 16:30 EastEnders 18:00 Songs of Praise 18:35 My Family 19:05 Horrible Histories with Stephen Fry

00:35 02:05 04:05 07:00 07:10 07:15 07:30 07:45 08:00 08:00 08:35 09:00 09:30 10:00 11:00 12:30 13:30 14:30 18:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

The Kennedys Honeydripper Close Wibbly Pig Dip Dap Pinky Dinky Doo Tinga Tinga Tales Octonauts Deadly 60 Leon Arthur Junior MasterChef Me and My Monsters Friday Download Something for the Weekend Escape to the Country EastEnders Live Golf: The Scottish Open Live Athletics Top Gear Coast Mock the Week In the Loop

01:35 The Cube Celebrity Special: McFly 02:30 The Zone 04:30 In Plain Sight 05:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 May the Best House Win 10:25 Dickinson's Real Deal 11:25 60 Minute Makeover 12:30 This Morning: Sunday 13:30 Dinner Date 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:34 Meridian Weather 14:35 Survival: Tales from the Wild 15:35 Inspector Morse 17:35 Midsomer Murders 19:30 Meridian News and Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 The Royal 21:00 Popstar to Operastar - The Final 22:00 Law & Order: UK 23:00 Popstar to Operastar: The Results 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 Meridian Weather 23:45 Eyes Wide Shut

LAW & ORDER: UK

19:35 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Fake or Fortune?

21:00 Countryfile 22:00 The World's Most Expensive Paintings 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Seve: The Legend

New series. Brooks and Devlin investigate a hospital department where three patients have died in suspicious circumstances in six months - the latest being a woman brought into A&E with flu-like symptoms. The detectives learn she died after being given a lethal cocktail of prescription drugs - but with an unsigned patient chart and an extremely busy evening on the ward, tracking down the killer proves challenging

02:10 Infernal Affairs II 04:15 Bob's Burgers 04:40 Hill Street Blues 05:30 One Tree Hill 06:15 Countdown 07:00 Sali Mali 07:05 The Treacle People 07:15 The Hoobs 08:05 Freesports on 4 08:35 Triathlon: Ironman UK 09:00 Friends 09:25 Style the Nation 10:00 T4 on the Beach: The Countdown 10:55 Hollyoaks 13:30 The Simpsons 14:40 T4 on the Beach 18:25 Deal or No Deal 19:20 Channel 4 News 19:50 4thought.tv 19:55 The Political Slot 20:00 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 21:00 Marley & Me 23:15 In Her Shoes

00:45 Forensic Files 01:15 SuperCasino 05:05 Meals in Moments 05:15 The FBI Files 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:35 Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends 07:50 Elmo's World 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:15 The Save-Ums! 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 Hana's Helpline 08:50 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:40 Milkshake! Monkey 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:30 The Milkshake! Show 11:00 Police Interceptors 12:00 New Cowboy Builders 13:00 The Restaurant Inspector 14:00 Rosamunde Pilcher's Autumn 15:45 Man of the House 17:35 Matilda 19:25 5 News Weekend 19:30 The Legend of Zorro 22:00 Master and Commander: the Far Side of the World

39

Monday 11th July

00:25 Weatherview 01:15 The Apprentice 02:15 The Apprentice: The Final Five 03:15 Holby City 04:15 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Food Fighters 12:45 Saints and Scroungers 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Doctors 15:10 Only Fools and Horses 16:05 Copycats 16:05 Dennis and Gnasher Shorts 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Escape from Scorpion Island 17:30 Horrible Histories 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show: Best of Britain 20:30 Fake Britain 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Gerry and the GPs Panorama 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport BBC2 01:15 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:10 04:55 07:00

The Front Line Reporters Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday The Super League Show Close Wibbly Pig

07:10 Dip Dap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Roar 08:25 Dennis and Gnasher 08:35 The Scooby-Doo Show 08:35 Newsround 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:30 LazyTown 09:55 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Little Charley Bear 10:25 Small Potatoes 10:30 Chuggington 10:45 Mr Bloom's Nursery 11:00 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Rowing 15:30 Animal 24:7 16:00 Flog It! 16:45 Antiques Road Trip 17:30 Weakest Link 18:15 Escape to the Country 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Railway Journeys 20:00 The Truth About Wildlife 20:30 Julia Bradbury's Canal Walks 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Antiques Master 22:00 The Life of Muhammad 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight

02:35 The Zone 03:00 British Superbike Championship Highlights 03:55 Motorsport UK 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Ten Mile Menu 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Dinner Date 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise Kitchen 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Strictly Kosher 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight 23:35 Rambo III

COUNTRYWISE KITCHEN New series. The return of the programme touring the UK in search of the best regional cookery. In the first edition, presenters Paul Heiney and Mike Robinson visit Devon in search of Salcombe crab and cream teas, as well as discovering the delights of the county's `red ruby' beef.

01:45 Stand Up for the Week 02:30 Bob's Burgers 02:55 5ive Days to Midnight 04:35 Hill Street Blues 05:30 One Tree Hill 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 According to Jim 09:55 Friends 10:55 Country House Rescue 11:55 A Place in the Sun 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Channel 4 Presents Stephen Miller 2012 13:10 Relocation: Phil Down Under 14:05 Operation Crossbow 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Quiz Trippers 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Murder on Honeymoon: Dispatches 22:00 Embarrassing Bodies: Teen Special 23:00 Sirens

00:40 Sniper 2 02:25 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Great Artists 05:35 Nick's Quest 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The Beeps 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Ebb and Flo 07:40 Olivia 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Bop Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Milkshake! Monkey 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Milkshake! Show Songs 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:10 The Obsession 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 How Do They Do It? 21:00 Police Interceptors 22:00 The Restaurant Inspector 23:00 Philadelphia

40

Tuesday 12th July

00:05 In with the Flynns 00:35 The Graham Norton Show 01:25 Business Nightmares with Evan Davis 02:25 Luther 03:25 Animal 24:7 04:10 An Island Parish 04:40 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Food Fighters 12:45 Saints and Scroungers 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Doctors 15:10 Only Fools and Horses 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Escape from Scorpion Island 17:30 The Itch of the Golden Nit 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show: Best of Britain 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 Crimewatch 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Crimewatch Update 23:45 Imagine BBC2 00:20 01:15 02:10 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00

Imagine: Ai Weiwei The Tudors Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday

04:30 Asia Business Report 04:40 Close 07:00 Wibbly Pig 07:10 Dip Dap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Roar 08:25 Dennis and Gnasher 08:35 The Scooby-Doo Show 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:30 LazyTown 09:55 Bob the Builder 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Little Charley Bear 10:25 Small Potatoes 10:30 Chuggington 10:45 Mr Bloom's Nursery 11:00 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Flog It! 16:45 Antiques Road Trip 17:30 Weakest Link 18:15 Escape to the Country 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Railway Journeys 20:00 Coast 21:00 Restoration Home 22:00 The Night Watch 23:30 Newsnight

01:25 The Zone 03:30 Nightwatch with Steve Scott 04:20 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Ten Mile Menu 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Dinner Date 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Animal Kingdom 21:00 Cops with Cameras 22:00 Homes from Hell 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Crank

HOMES FROM HELL New series. Real-life stories of people's property nightmares, beginning with the north London homeowners who had to go to court when their ÂŁ900,000 dream purchase was taken over by squatters. The programme also features British expats whose rebuilding of their damaged home in Andalusia was halted by the police, and a retired couple who bought a villa in Cyprus reveal how they lost their money on a crumbling wreck.

00:05 Channel 4 Presents Danielle Brown 2012 00:10 Coming Up: Rough Skin 00:40 Lee Evans XL Tour 01:40 European Poker Tour 02:40 24 Hours in A&E 03:35 Embarrassing Bodies 04:30 Ancient Egyptians 05:25 Machines Time Forgot 06:20 One Tree Hill 07:05 Sali Mali 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 According to Jim 09:55 Friends 10:55 Country House Rescue 11:55 A Place in the Sun 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 The Secret Supper Club 13:35 River Cottage Bites 13:50 The Sea Wolves 16:05 Channel 4 Presents - David Smith 2012 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Quiz Trippers 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Four Rooms 22:00 Undercover Boss 23:00 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA

01:35 Forensic Files 02:05 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The Beeps 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Ebb and Flo 07:40 Olivia 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Bop Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Milkshake! Monkey 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Milkshake! Show Songs 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:10 Inside Hollywood 16:20 Mystery Woman: Snapshot 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Mexican Food Made Simple 21:00 Monster Moves 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

41

Wednesday 13th July

01:05 The Scheme 01:55 Coast 02:55 The Country House Revealed 03:55 Fake Britain 04:40 An Island Parish 05:10 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Food Fighters 12:45 Saints and Scroungers 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Doctors 15:10 Only Fools and Horses 16:05 Copycats 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Escape from Scorpion Island 17:30 Little Howard's Big Question 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show: Best of Britain 20:30 The Great British Weather 21:30 In with the Flynns 22:00 The Apprentice 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Not Going Out BBC2 00:20 Afghanistan: The Unknown Country 01:20 The Tudors 02:20 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday

05:10 Close 07:00 Wibbly Pig 07:10 Dip Dap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Roar 08:25 Dennis and Gnasher 08:35 The Scooby-Doo Show 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:30 LazyTown 09:55 Bob the Builder 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Little Charley Bear 10:25 Small Potatoes 10:30 Chuggington 10:40 Mr Bloom's Nursery 11:00 Gigglebiz 11:15 Zingzillas 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 Daily Politics 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Flog It! 16:45 Antiques Road Trip 17:30 Weakest Link 18:15 Escape to the Country 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Great British Railway Journeys 20:00 The Culture Show 21:00 Top Gear 22:00 This World: Italy's Bloodiest Mafia 23:00 The Apprentice: You're Fired!

23:30 Newsnight

01:10 The Zone 03:15 Crossing Jordan 04:00 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Ten Mile Menu 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Dinner Date 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Unforgettable Leonard Rossiter 21:00 Lewis 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Car Crime UK

THE GREAT BRITISH WEATHER New series. Live interactive series that taps into the nation's obsession with the weather, presented by Alexander Armstrong, Chris Hollins and Carol Kirkwood. Former England cricketer Andrew `Freddie' Flintoff is a guest in the first edition, from St Ives in Cornwall, while Chris Hollins goes in search of the world's second largest fish, the basking shark.

00:05 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 01:05 European Poker Tour 02:05 Beach Volleyball 03:00 Athletics 03:55 FIM Superbike World Championship 04:20 KOTV Boxing Weekly 04:50 The Grid 05:15 British Formula 3 05:40 Triathlon: Ironman UK 06:10 That Paralympic Show 06:35 Scrapheap Challenge 07:30 Sali Mali 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 According to Jim 09:55 Friends 10:50 C4 Presents - David Clarke 10:55 Country House Rescue 11:55 A Place in the Sun 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Relocation: Phil Down Under 14:10 River Cottage Bites 14:15 Proud Parents 14:30 The Law and Jake Wade 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Quiz Trippers 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Extreme Parental Guidance 22:00 24 Hours in A&E 23:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Uncut 23:50 The Killing

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:00 Crimes That Shook the World 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The Beeps 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Ebb and Flo 07:40 Olivia 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Bop Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:10 The Battle of Mary Kay 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Garden ER 21:00 The Removal Men: Pickfords 22:00 NCIS 23:00 The Contractor

42

Thursday 14th July

BBC2 00:15 Him & Her 00:45 Kevin & Perry Go Large 02:05 Bang Goes the Theory 02:35 Richard Hammond's Engineering Connections 03:25 Saints and Scroungers 03:50 Royal Upstairs Downstairs 04:20 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 Panorama 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Food Fighters 12:45 Saints and Scroungers 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Doctors 15:10 Only Fools and Horses 16:05 Copycats 16:05 Dennis and Gnasher Shorts 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Escape from Scorpion Island 17:30 Richard Hammond's Blast Lab 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show: Best of Britain 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Traffic Cops 22:00 Torchwood: Miracle Day 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Classroom Secrets

00:20 Golf: The Open Championship 00:50 The Culture Show 01:50 HARDtalk 02:00 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:20 Close 07:00 Wibbly Pig 07:10 Dip Dap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Roar 08:25 Dennis and Gnasher 08:35 The Scooby-Doo Show 08:35 Newsround 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:25 Small Potatoes 09:30 Chuggington 09:40 Gigglebiz 10:00 Live Golf: The Open Championship 21:00 Rick Stein's Spain 22:00 History Cold Case 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 Homes from Hell 01:30 The Zone 03:35 Meteor 05:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Ten Mile Menu 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Dinner Date 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Rising Cost of Food: Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Single-Handed 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Piers Morgan's Life Stories

RICK STEIN'S SPAIN New series. The chef embarks on a culinary tour of the country laced with history, literature and stunning photography. Driving a clapped-out old VW camper van around the Galicia region on the Atlantic coast, Rick discovers places off the beaten track as he samples classic dishes of rural Spain, a country he believes has been underrated in cookery circles until quite recently.

01:45 Hard-Fi's RockCorps: You Decide 01:55 Live from Abbey Road 02:35 Mercury Prize Sessions 02:50 The Album Chart Show: Spotlight 03:05 Cheaper by the Dozen 04:35 Hill Street Blues 05:25 One Tree Hill 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Frasier 09:25 According to Jim 09:55 Friends 10:55 Country House Rescue 11:55 A Place in the Sun: Home or Away 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Relocation: Phil Down Under 14:05 None but the Brave 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Quiz Trippers 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Help! My House Is Falling Down 22:00 The Killing 23:00 Coppers

01:00 Poker: Aussie Millions 02:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:00 Rough Guide to Beaches 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The Beeps 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Ebb and Flo 07:40 Olivia 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Bop Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 The WotWots 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Ice Road Truckers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:15 Little Girl Lost: the Delimar Vera Story 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Zoo Days 21:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 22:00 New Cowboy Builders 23:00 Candy Bar Girls

Friday, July 8, 2011

43

44

Friday, July 8, 2011

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES 10 cold drinks /snack vending machines with sites 44,900 euros.

Excellent cash income, no overhead, operate from home 31,000 euros NETT per year one day p.w. to service.25 Pringle vending machines with sites 14,900 euros 250 euros per week NETT guaranteed, machines and sites available individually. 965

AWNINGS

326 442 / 659 696 455 (09) Bar for sale. Quesada area.

Going cheap. For information pack, email: . Tel: 688 800 960 (16)

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly. Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non-denominational. Sunday services 11:00am. Children’s Church 11:00am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11:00am. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome 966 799 273 // 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3 Pilar de la Horadada opposite the old cinema.

Sunday Service 11am.

Home groups Tuesday times vary Bible Study and Prayer Meeting Thursday 5pm.

Pastor Rev. Eddie Martens Tel 966 769 300 Mobile 650 509 600

BUILDER

PROPERTY FOR RENT

MORTGAGES URGENT MORTGAGES. We can lend you money for your house. We don´t care about RAI/ASNEF, proof of income or age limit. Free evaluation 966 698 781 / 696 289 407 email- eddieandnesta@hotmail.com (22)

PETS

FOR RENT & SALES APARTMENT GRANT ALACANT: Luxury apartment in residential 200 mt from Beach, 2 Bath, 2 Bedrooms (75 mt2).

Furnished & parquet. Big corner terrace with southsea views (28 mt2).

Included garage & pools.For years Rent: 650 €mth/ Sale: 250.000€ / juanjo.campello@yahoo. es

8ft by 4ft Slate bed Snooker/Pool table, Snooker balls, pool balls and a set of triple lights. Also many extras all in excellent condition Cost 1,700€ will sell for 450€ OVNO Telephone 965726127 or 663 446 892 (20) For sale. Double & electric

2 Siamese kittens, free to good home. Both are chocolate point and white Ready in 2 weeks, both parents can be seen. Call 603 121 785 for more info(25) 5 month old Collie Cross Pup free to good home Full time jobs force reluctant parting He is brown with collie markings and has green eyes! a very handsome dog, fully house trained and is a big bundle of fun!

Call 603 121 785 (25)

Luxury appartments, 2/3 bedrooms in San Miguel De Salinas.

Floor heating, Elevator, Roof terrace with swimming pool, from 385 euros/month Also holiday rentals and appartments in San Miguel de Salinas from 350 euros / month. 966 723 437 and 616 487 493 (25) Ref: 49, 2nd floor one bedroom apartment situated conveniently located in the town centre of Torrevieja, with a small sun balcony

FURNITURE

SECURITY

SHUTTERS

FOR SALE

AIR CONDITIONING

sliding gates in aluminium, guaranteed no rust. Call Tracy on 966 726 891 for details.(22) Inflatable dinghy for sale.

Tough rubber. Carries two adults. 90 euros ONO. Tel: 616 596 647 or 672 192 482.(22)

PERSONAL Attractive sexy couple looking for femine women for threesome fun and friendship. Genuine, clean & discreet, within 1 hour of Murcia. Contact 634 364 731(23)

TILER

overlooking the lovely communal pool. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, South facing 3 bedroomed property situated injardin Del Mar VII, with communal pool nearby.

Close to amenities. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, super-

PLUMBERS

SPORTS EQUIPMENT

PAVING

CAR MECHANIC REMOVALS

LOCKSMITH

SWIMMING POOL MAINTENANCE

VAN HIRE

ADVERTISE HERE FOR A FIVER!

CARPENTER

market, restaurants and bars. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops.

Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 128, A lovely One bedroom 2nd floor apartment, American style kitchen,

45

Friday, July 8, 2011 Lounge with patio doors to balcony, in the San Luis area. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104, Lovely Two Bedroom Apartment in Torrevieja, within walking distance of Friday Market and the beach. The Property is close to the Habaneras Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 155, Luxurious Three Bedroom Villa With Private Pool, in Quesada Close to shops and restaurants within a five minute drive, and Guadamar Beach is within a ten minute drive. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 708, A lovely two bed-

room, one bathroom corner ground floor apartment with a spacious patio & Residents off road parking.

Communal pool near by.

Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

CARDS

CHIROPODIST

SURVEYS

NEWS AGENTS

PROPERTY FOR SALE Gran Alacant, corner semi detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bathrooms, large garden, enclosed terrace, fully furnished, private drive for 2 cars, on gated desirable urbanisation Monte Faro, many facilities priced for quick sale 185,000 Tel 680333242 House for sale. Santiago de la Ribera, 3-4 bedrooms, lovely garden, two balconies, two fireplaces, quiet neighbourhood, five minutes walk to beach.

Tel: 616596647 or 672192482 (22).

Balsares, terraced 4 bedroomed house, 3 bathrooms, large underbuild, private underground parking direct to house, small gated

urbanisation, directly over looking proposed new golf course opposite Gran Alacant, priced for quick sale at original off plan price 180.000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath mid terraced Altomar 1, views of Alicante Bay, close to communal pool, walking distance to bars and resturants opportunity at reduced price 145,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, front line, 2 bed, 1 bath, downstairs toilet, fully furnished, roof terrace, walking distance to beaches, large communal and resturants, beach front property priced for quick sale 125,000 Tel 680333242 Quesada, detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bath, all large rooms, front enclosed conservatory, fully furnished, oiled fuelled heating, outdoor poolside kitchen and bbq area enclosed, large pool, outside toilet, garage for 2 cars, newly refurbished, established garden with fruit trees, set in a cul de sac on 1000m2, the overall plot can be divided, as registered as two plots, so this house could be a sub-

SIGNS

stantial investment opportunity, situated in the Dona pepe area close to Quesada town centre, priced 299,000 negotiable Tel 680333242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles.

It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property

comes with a large communal swimming pool.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 510, €79,999.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 146, €85,000. Three bedroom Two bathroom quad house in Dream Hills.

Off road parking on the front driveway with gates that can be padlocked for security.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €195,000.

Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

SITUATIONS VACANT

PETS

MOSQUITOS

TATTOOS

LOCKSMITH

46

Friday, July 8, 2011

SILLY RUGGERS!

DURING their 1978 tour of Australia, the great Welsh team of that era tried all sorts of devious methods to get freebie phone calls through to their wives and loved ones back home.

The players resorted to tricks like asking restaurant proprietors if they could use the phone - and then calling the other side of the world when the proprietor thought they were ringing a local number.

Prop forward Charlie Faulkner - a not-so-bright member of the legendary Pontypool front row - opted for a different tactic at the reception that followed the first Test match in Brisbane.

He picked up the house phone, got through to the sswitchboard and barked out his home number in Newport. ‘‘To whom do I charge the

CALL GUY: Faulkner call?’’ asked the operator. ‘‘Err…Mr Dawes. John Dawes,’’ mumbled Charlie, figuring he could get the tour coach to pick up the tab. ‘‘Please remain by the phone for a moment, Mr

As a journalist and lifelong rugby fan, DONNA GEE has been privy to a host of amusing tales involving players and officials. Here are a few...

Dawes, and I’ll call you back,’’ came the reply.

Charlie replaced the receiver and got back to the business of drowning his sorrows after a rare defeat. By the time the call came through a few minutes later, he was in another world. ‘‘Ullo,’’ said Charlie. ‘‘I have a call to South Wales for Mr John Dawes,’’ confirmed the operator.

Charlie took a quick look around. ‘‘He’s not here,’’ he barked and hung up.

H E I N Z VA R I E T I E S : To n y O’Reilly, who played 29 times for Ireland before becoming a mega-rich international businessman and head of the Heinz empire, had to make a brief trip to a Dublin hospital after being involved in a minor traffic accident.

With medical treatment in Ireland charged on a sliding scale according to income, the nurse who was filling in the details on his behalf asked: ‘’Mr O’Reilly, do you earn more than 10,000 punts (pounds)?’’ ‘‘Now that depends on whether you are talking about the hour or the day’’.

HEADS WE WIN: Wales coach Clive Rowlands was giving his customary prematch talk before an allimportant international at Cardiff Arms Park.

As usual, the players were locked into Room 338 at the nearby Angel Hotel - and the emotive Rowlands was pounding them with reasons why they had to grind the

PAUL ACKFORD: The longest day opposition into the dust. By the time he had finished working on their emotions, the wound-up stars were ready to die for their country literally. ‘‘What are you going to do?’’ Rowlands bellowed as the electric atmosphere reached fever pitch. ‘‘WIN!’’ yelled the players. ‘’What are we going to do?’’ echoed Clive. ‘‘Win, win …WIN!’’ It was all too much for second-row forward Geoff Wheel. The big man from Swansea worked himself into a frenzy and, screaming ‘‘Kill, KILL!’’, he charged at the door to Room 338 - and butted a hole clean through it.

A FATE WORSE THAN BREATH: After four years in the England team, veteran

prop Paul Rendall had seen it all. So it was only natural he should want to put new boy Paul Ackford’s mind at ease as they prepared to face Australia at Twickenham. ‘‘Don’t worry,’’ Rendall assured police inspector Ackford in the changing room before the match. ’’The game will fly by. You’ll find the first half seems like three minutes and the second half four minutes.’’

England went on to produce a dazzling performance and were within five minutes of a memorable victory when Ackford staggered up to Rendall during an injury stoppage. ‘‘You’re a f***ing liar!’’ gasped the 6ft 6in lock. ‘’I’ve been out here for four-and-a-

half hours and the game’s still not over.’’

ARMS AND THE MAN: There was no question of injured Tommy Martin making his own way off the field.

The Leigh and Great Britain second row needed a stretcher after taking a bad knock on his ankle - but the one and only St John Ambulance stretcher was already occupied by another player.

As Martin lay writhing on the ground and the fans bayed for the action to restart, desperate officials grabbed an office chair from the clubhouse and dashed on to the pitch with it. Martin was lifted gingerly into the seat, and with one embarrassed committee man either side, the chair was hoisted

into the air by its arms.

With the crowd roaring their approval, Martin was steered tentatively towards the dressing room . Five seconds later, there was a huge crack and the committee men were left holding a chair arm each as the seat and legs tipped Martin out straight onto his damaged ankle.

GRIN AT THE DEEP END: To celebrate Leigh’s feat in avoiding relegation, coach Tom Grainey took his strugglers on holiday to Majorca.

Some months later, his assistant Colin Clarke was reflecting on the break in the changing room at Hilton Park. ‘’Remember it, lads?’’ he mused. ‘’All that sun and San Miguel…and old Grainey up on the top diving board doing a double somersault with pike?’’ With that, prop forward Derek Pyke chirped up: ‘’Hey, it weren’t me. I were out on a training run.’’

WIGAN’S BIG ‘UN: The groupie girl outside Wigan’s Riverside Club eyed up the town’s new Rugby League hero - and liked what she saw. ‘‘Hiya, big boy,’’ she said to burly South African Nick Du Toit, her eyes settling on the most personal part of the 6ft 3in forward’s anatomy. ‘’Tell me, are you built in proportion all over?’’ ‘ ‘Listen, lady,’’ replied Du Toit in his clipped Afrikaans tones. ‘’If I was built in proportion, I’d be 12 foot ten!’’

England girls eye World Cup glory

ENGLAND women's football coach Hope Powell praised her players after they beat Japan 20 to reach the quarter-finals of the World Cup. Goals from Ellen White and Rachel Yankey set up a game against France in Leverkusen on Saturday.

"We had a game plan, the girls implemented it, we've topped the group and it can only increase our confidence," Powell told reporters ]"We were very, very good and I'm so proud of how well the girls played." England needed to avoid defeat against Japan to be sure of reaching the last eight.

They got off to the perfect start when White's lob put them ahead after 15 minutes, with Yankey's clever finish in the second half wrapping up the points.

"The ambition was to get out of the group," added Powell.

"We're still in the competition, we're not going home and that is brilliant for England.’’.

WORLD SPORTS ROUNDUP with Mick Hardy from Kidease

Germany’s Mexican rave

GERMANY beat England in Under-17 World Cup quarterfinal in Mexico – leaving the Garmans to battle it out with Brazil, Uruguay and the hosts for the trophy John Peacock's side went 3-0 down early in the second half.

However, a Sam Magri penalty and Hallam Hope goal put them back in the contest, with six minutes remaining.

But England could not find an equaliser and, as with Fabio Capello's senior side in South Africa last year, it was Germany who advanced at their expense.

Shin and bear it, Thomas!

FRENCHMAN Thomas Levet has been forced to withdraw from The 140th Open Championship due to the injury he sustained whilst celebrating his victory at last week’s French Open. Following his dramatic win on home soil in Paris, Levet leapt into the lake by the 18th green and suffered a hairline fracture to his shin.

He said: “I’m extremely disappointed to miss out on The Open Championship, but my specialist has advised me to have an operation on the fracture. I will have screws and a plate inserted and will be off for six weeks which is very bad timing, with so many important tournaments coming up. His place at Royal St George’s goes to American Robert Garrigus.

Lorenzo’s Italian job

YAMAHA Factory Racing rider Lorenzo powered his YZRM1 to victory in the Tuscan sunshine at Mugello. He jumped from fifth on the grid to tuck in behind race leader Casey Stoner on the first corner. Stoner went on to build an early lead while Lorenzo engaged in a battle with Andrea Dovizioso for second. Having finally dispatched him after four laps the Mallorcan began the hunt for Stoner. Lorenzo

delivered a series of perfect laps to catch and then pass the race leader before extending a lead of just under a second to the line.

Tour joy for Cavendish

MARK Cavendish won the fifth stage of the Tour de France on a day marred by crashes to the likes of Alberto Contador and Bradley Wiggins.

Cavendish powered to the front in a frantic sprint finish to come home ahead of Philippe Gilbert.

RadioShack leader Janez Brajkovic was forced to retire after being injured in an incident 92kms from the finish.

47

Friday, July 8, 2011

A TICKET TO NOWHERE

“. . . and the first Gold mess-up of the 2012 London Olympic PHIL SMITH REPORTS Games goes to . . . GREAT BRITAIN” YES, before a tape's been breasted, a ball been kicked and an arrow fired we've managed to pocket a Gold.

The event - Ticket Allocation, or to be more precise: Ticket Allocation cock-up!

rate customers. They are now able to offer full package deals from tickets, to travel, to accommodation to what they call "fully inclusive top-notch ticket, hotel and transport experience." Of course they are!

What we also know is that two of our gold medal heroes from the Beijing Olympics of 2008, cyclist Bradley Wiggins and diver Tom Daley, have been able to buy two tickets each.

From the moment the tape went up and we landed the big prize it's been farce heaped on chaos, heaped on incompetence, heaped on frustration, heaped on mistrust and disbelief for the poor old paying customer.

Another fine mess they've got us into!

Complaints

Lottery Lord Seb and his Coehorts have managed to create new standard of mismanagement with their socalled Ticket Lottery (except that in a genuine lottery you know that you have just as good a chance of winning as the guy next door).

The London Organising Committee for the Olympic Games (LOCOG to you and me) under the leadership of Lord Seb - a wonderful former gold medallist himself have created a fiasco of unimaginable proportions, turning a fairly simple sales exercise (what's difficult about selling tickets: Camelot do it every week without a hitch) into some-

BEST OF BRITISH: Seb Coe wins Olympic gold thing akin to teeth-pulling agony.

They decided to release tickets in stages - a few million here, a couple more there and so on - and I suspect this was because they wanted to get rid first of the less popular tickets among the 26 sports and 39 disciplines.But because of the somewhat devious application process (all on-line by the way, so if you didn't have computer internet access you had no chance) you handed over Credit Card information, selected what sports and dates you want-

ed (four seats maximum) then sat back and waited . . . and waited . . . and waited!

Now we're told that there have been 20,000,000 applications for the 6,000,000 tickets available, which is all very encouraging, very patriotic and very confusing.LOCOG must be thrilled to know that demand has way outstripped supply and it might even be possible that the mountain of debt amassed by Lord Seb and Coe will be "manageable".

The National Audit Office reckons that "some progress" has been made

on the estimated £9.3billion overall cost of the Games, and that of the original £2.74billion of taxpayers’ money set aside to help pay for the Games, they still have £900million in safe keeping. Well that's good to know.

What we also know, of course, is that the racketeers have managed to get their noses into the trough and skimmed off close to a million tickets in some guise or another. And of course tickets for the International Olympic Committee (second only to FIFA when it comes

to allegations of corruption) and their thousands of hangers-on will have been in plentiful supply.

There have also been suggestions that Colonel Gaddafi and his family have managed to get their hands on some tickets, a story quickly rubbished by LOCOG. But be careful who you sit next to, just in case.Tickets have been freely available on a couple of German and French websites, and Thomas Cook admits they've managed to get their hands on 300,000 tickets for corpo-

These are the only two athletes, as far as I can gather, who have so far had the courage to question the "fairness" of the Ticket Lottery. Don't be surprised to hear more complaints as we enter the final 365-day stretch in a couple of week’s time.

What we can be certain of is the emergence of a whole host of "Wanna buy a ticket?" touts around the Olympic Park. Touts and big occasions seem to go hand in hand.

What we might also watch out for over the coming months are the horror stories of people who have had money taken out of their accounts with so sign of any tickets. It will happen for certain.

Watch this space - and happy ticket hunting!

I may be related to Rory, says football great McIlroy

By STEVE BOTT

RORY McIlroy is a sporting success story that the whole of the UK should be getting right behind as the Open fast approaches.

But one man who will be cheering on the US Open winner long and loud is footballing great Jimmy McIlroy himself a sporting legend, particularly in Northern Ireland and in Burnley, where he has a stand named after him at Turf Moor.

Jimmy was a silky smooth inside forward with great touch and vision and he still cuts quite a dash today, even though he will be 80 in October.

"Jimmy is still fit and trim and playing golf. He goes down to Turf Moor most days and certainly for the matches," said Frank Casper, another former Burnley star and later manager.

"They named a stand after me and gave me a honorary season ticket so I do go down to the games quite often, yes," said Jim. Some of Jimmy's family moved in and around Holywood, east of Belfast, where Rory hails from and Jim, straight off the golf course at his club Clitheroe, said: "There is talk that we may be related. I

know when I was around 10 some of my family moved down there near Holywood." On his own game of golf, Jimmy doesn't think he'll be amongst the bookies favourites for the Open, but he said: "I have just got in from 18 holes at Clitheroe. I used to be a member at Burnley Golf Club, but the course is a bit too hilly for me now.

"I don't have a handicap at the moment and my best was about 12 when I did. I just love the game and I particularly like a good fourball."

Meanwhile, with his kids away looking for the Loch Ness Monster, Phil Mickelson turned his own thoughts to something that has proved just as elusive - a victory in Britain. But the 41-year-old left-hander, who has managed only one top-ten finish in 17 appearances at The Open, believes his chances have been hugely boosted this year .Not by Tiger Woods pulling out through injury, but by the switch of the Barclays Scottish Open from Loch Lomond to the new Castle Stuart Golf Links near Inverness.

"I think the move is going to be a huge plus," said Mickelson. "I expect the winner of next week's Open will be

in the field this week.”

Asked about his Open record, the three-time Masters champion added: "I've not performed to the level I have week-in and week-out in the States and I want to change that. I'm planning on doing that!’’

48

Friday, July 8, 2011

THE COURIER No.1 for SPORT! All the action p46, 47

RIFT-WRAPPED SAM DEFECTS TO ENEMY Elche skipper in €400,000 Hercules switch HERO OF HERCULES: Samuel Llorca meets the fans and media at his new club this week

HOME AND HIGH: Fernando Usero is on his way back to Elche from Cordoba

By DAN SMITH ELCHE captain Samuel Llorca committed one of football’s cardinal sins this week by signing for the club’s eternal rivals, Hercules.

The player’s time with Elche had without doubt run its course; a dressing room rift at the end of the 2009/10 season had the tall centre-back watching from the stands as punishment for his involvement, only to be given chance to redeem himself as the season drew to its conclusion.

And no one could argue that his return to the squad coincided with Elche’s best run of the whole season.

The club were under illusions that come the end of the season, Samuel would be knocking at manager José Bordalás´s door asking for a way out. La Liga newcomers Rayo Vallecano appeared interested as his representative negotiated the cancellation of his contract.

The price was fixed at 400,000 euros and Samuel got his long-awaited freedom, only to sign for rivals Hercules, a move that hasn't gone down well with President José Sepulcre and Elche’s fans.

With the nucleus of the squad retained from last

Pictures: Mark Welton

season, Elche appear unrushed to draw too much attention the their recent acquisitions .

Signings include forward Javier Flaño from Numancia, a player with a wealth of La Liga experience, while former Elche favourite Fernando Usero makes his return after a spell at Cordoba. The likeable right-sided player should fit in well to the style of play Elche have adopted during the present reign of manager Bordalás.

Another signing this week is 26-year-old right winger Perico, released by his old club Salamanca after their relegation to the 2nd division B. Keeper Jaime’s days appear numbered, although nothing has been confirmed, but with the club actively seeking a keeper it seems highly likely that the crowd favourite is ready to leave in the near future.

Injured striker Miguel Linares, looks set for his return after a knee injury meant he missed virtually all the second half of the season just as he was beginning to hit form.

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