The Courier Week 27

Edition 27

EXCLUSIVE

WADE DOOLEY

on the 2011 Rugby World Cup WITH just 13 days to go to the big-kick-off in New Zealand, the Courier’s big signing kicks off his weekly column with a look at England’s fortunes in previous World Cups, including the year they didn’t even make it to the host country...

SEE PAGE 47

www.thecourier.es

Friday, August 26, 2011

SHOCKING!

Cut-off couple left without electricity for THREE MONTHS DONNA GEE reports

AN El Raso couple’s three-month nightmare without electricity has finally been ended - thanks to the intervention of The Courier.

Bob and Sue Kemp’s Spanish home was left in the dark after bungling suppliers HC Energia removed their meter in May. And despite a flood of promises that they were on the ‘priority list’ for reconnection, they were STILL without power at the beginning of this week.

The Sussex-based Kemps were stunned when the meter was taken away with Asturia-based HC Energia claiming they were €69 in arrears with their bank payments. ‘‘Whether we owed the money or not, we paid the €69 immediately using a bank card,’’ said Sue, ‘‘and the company said we would have our supply back within a few days. ‘‘When nothing happened, we called them again...and again...and again. ‘‘We always got the same reply, that they were having a computer glitch but we were on the priority list for reconnection. Yet no-one ever came. It was promise after promise – but absolutely no action.’’

Sue added: ‘‘Normally we come out to El Raso four or five times a year, but this year we didn’t come until June because Bob had

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Necks time you go down, get some for me TELEPHONE

679 096 309 96 672 6437 JUNGLE DRUMS E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Alto del Moncayo s/n, Guardamar del Segura, 03140, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 672 64 37 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 96 672 6437 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 96 672 6437 616 332 178 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Denise La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 616 332 178 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Writers Mick Hardy Donna Gee Suzanne Manners Sally Bengtsson Harry Nuttall Harold Heys Phil Smith Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe

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Picture of the week

96 672 7334

‘I WAS PUMPED UP LIKE A BALLOON’

Freak airhose accident is pain in the backside

AN ELECTRICIAN revealed this week how he almost died when his body was ‘inflated’ by a compressed air hose which went up his backside at work.

Gareth Durrant, 26, told the Daily Mail he felt like he had been ‘blown up’ as the air - carrying 300lbs per square inchentered his body in a freak factory accident.

He underwent emergency surgery and is still suffering from the long term effects of his injuries and the trauma. He has been unable to work and and is making a civil claim for compensation against his employer.

Mr Durrant was working at Willerby Holiday Homes in Hull when the incident occurred in July last year. Pressurised air lines hang from the ceiling and are used to connect to power tools on the production line. He was wearing shorts and somehow one of these lines went into his bottom, ripping his clothing and sending air rushing inside his body.

Mr Durrant said: ‘I was reaching up to finish the wiring on a caravan at the factory. I knew this air hose was being used close behind me but I just carried on the job as normal.

‘The next thing I knew I felt this strong air being blown on my legs from behind, and then something went up my rectum through the shorts I was wearing.

‘It felt like I had been blown up, it was the biggest shock of my life. There was air fizzing around inside my back passage and stomach, it was so weird.

At that time I didn’t feel much pain. Then it kicked in and I just can’t put in to words how painful it was.’’

Scans revealed a six-inch bowel tear and severe damage to his intestines, which required an emergency operation.

Monday Partly cloudy High Temperature: 30°C RealFeel: 30°C

11 die in horror blaze ELEVEN people, including six children, died in a late-night house fire in the Australian east coast city of Logan on Tuesday.

Thirteen people were in the two-storey house in suburban Kingston when the fire broke out at around midnight, but only two men managed to escape, police Superintendent Noel Powers told reporters.

One of the men was taken to a hospital for treatment of facial burns, while the second man remained at the scene despite suffering shoulder injuries.

Police and neighbours said the victims

were predominantly from two families from Tonga. Faiumu Tafeaga said his nephew Misi Matauaina escaped by jumping from a window after his partner woke him.

Matauaina’s partner and their two children, aged three and six, were unable to get out, Mr Tafeaga said. “There was no time to go back into the house (pictured above the day after the blaze). He got a few burns,” Faiumu said of his nephew.

He added that four other children aged 11, 14, 16 and 17 - were trapped in the fire. Multiple human remains were found in the ruins.

Today Sunny High Temperature: 29°C RealFeel: 30°C

Saturday Sunny High Temperature: 27°C RealFeel: 28°C

Sunday Partly sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 28°C

Tuesday Sunny High Temperature: 31°C RealFeel: 34°C

Wednesday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 31°C

Thursday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 30°C

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Cut-off couple’s electricity nightmare From Page One been ill. We stayed for 10 days and it was one long, dreadful nightmare. ‘‘We had no power, no lights, no hot water, no air conditioning, it was like camping. We couldn’t even make a cup of tea. ‘‘Also, our alarm is not working, which is very worrying because there have been quite a few break-ins in the area. ‘’We got so frustrated with phoning HC Energia and being given false promises that we went to a Spanish solicitor for help. She even threatened them with legal action, but it had absolutely no effect.

‘‘Throughout it all, HC Energia have been taking nearly €30 from our bank account every month, yet we are getting nothing in return. It’s crazy.’’

So why don’t they change to another supplier? ‘‘That’s what we want to do,’’ says Sue. ‘‘But our solicitor has advised us not to because of all potential complications.’’

Bob and Sue are due back at El Raso on September 10, but have so little faith in HC Energia that they were resigned to having to endure another horror holiday in the dark.

The whole episode has caused them so much stress that they are considering putting the three-bedroom property

up for sale. Said Bob: ‘‘We used to love coming to El Raso but when we have to deal with companies like HC Energia, it makes us wonder what we are doing here at all. Their customer service is non-existent.’’

An El Raso neighbour, Madeleine Laid has been acting as an intermediary for the Kemps, who don’t have internet facilities. She told me: ‘‘Each time I telephoned HC Energia, I was told that the Kemps' electricity meter would be reinstalled within a few days but that didn't happen. ‘‘I also emailed them several times over a period of two months and received only one reply.

‘‘On Monday this week, I received a second email saying it was "still in process at the department. ‘’It is a shocking state of affairs that people can be left without electricity for so long in a member state of the EEC.’’ When my colleague Sally Bengtsson called HC Energia about the Kemps’ dilemma on Monday, she was told someone would call her back ‘‘as soon as possible’’ to clarify the situation.

As if by magic, the meter was reinstalled before the day was out.

Said Ms Laid: ‘‘I don't believe it would have happened as quickly without The Courier phoning them and making it clear you were on the case.’’

WANTED - DEAD OR ALIVE

FUGITIVE tyrant Colonel Muhamar Gaddafi had a £1million “dead or alive” bounty placed on his head on Wednesday.

The Daily Mirror’s Chris Hughes reported that as fighting raged throughout Libyan capital Tripoli, two rebel businessmen in the second city Benghazi put up the kill-orcapture offer to stop the bloodshed.

Rebel leaders also offered an amnesty to any of Gaddafi’s henchmen to either kill the hiding dictator or hand him over – and they would be free men in the new Libya.

Gaddafi, thought to have used a secret network of tunnels beneath Tripoli to flee his opponents, told an Arabic television station his withdrawal was tactical and promised death or victory against rebels.

Amnesty The US believes he is still in the country but rebel commander Abdel Hakim Belhadj said he did not know where the hated despot or his sons had escaped to, adding: “They ran like rats.”

National Transitional Council leader Mustafa Abdel-Jalil confirmed the amnesty offer for any of the tyrant’s followers who kill or capture him and also spoke of the bounty money put up by the two wealthy rebel sympathisers.

He said: “The NTC supports the initiative of businessmen who are offering two million

dinars – or £1million – for the capture of Gaddafi, dead or alive.”

Gaddafi loyalists, however, launched rocket and mortar attacks on several rebel-held areas in Tripoli, including the Bab al-Aziziyah compound close to the Rixos hotel where foreigners are staying.

The tyrant earlier called for residents to “cleanse” the capital of insurgents.

But the transitional government in Benghazi was already on the move to the capital to take over as heads of the new Libya. And even Gaddafi’s former henchmen admitted his reign was over, despite pockets of resistance by die-hard supporters of the Colonel.

Asked by Channel 4 news if a negotiated settlement or safe passage from Libya for Gaddafi were still possible, Foreign Minister Abdul Ati al-Obeidi said: “It looks like things have passed this kind of solution.”

Later, Col Khalifa Mohammed, Gaddafi’s deputy chief of intelligence, announced he had defected to the rebels.

Gaddafi’s remaining forces were said to be heading for his home town of Sirte, raising fears of a bloody final showdown with the rebels.

As many as 400 people have been killed and 2,000 wounded during this week’s fighting in Tripoli. And hostile fire around the city centre signalled the six-month uprising had not yet completely triumphed.

£1 MILLION REWARD

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Friday, August 26, 2011

THE RIGHTEOUS AND THE RIOTOUS

And as for the wet lettuce judges...

THE Tories never change their spots, do they?

In one breath they're telling us how important it is to tighten our belts, suffer cuts in services and cope with less income for years in the future, and in the next they're trying to cut higher-rate tax for the super rich.

What sort of message is this? We've seen during the recent riots the have-nots running amok in our cities, looting and causing mayhem - hasn't it dawned on the Tories that the massive gap between the super rich and the people at the bottom of the pile has something to do with it?

The excuse of the Tories for wanting to reduce higher-rate income tax from 50 per cent is that it encourages even more tax avoidance among the super rich, makes Britain less competitive with the rest of the world and puts us at risk of seeing the super rich moving overseas.

offenders right through the generations, making it perfectly clear that we will never tolerate burglars, thieves, rapists, arsonists, drug dealers, murderers, benefit cheats and their ilk.

Over the last 20 years, mainly during the watch of wet-weak Socialists, we've seen the rise of soppy Britain, under the guise of being a more liberal society.

Where that gets us we have seen in the recent riots, when people think it acceptable to help themselves, regardless of the pain it inflicts on everyone else.

So, hats off to the judges and magistrates who have been sending these b*****s to prison where they rightly deserve to be.

But beware, the wet-weaks are waiting in the wings. Already soppy barristers are lining up to lodge appeals against the jail sentences of these wrong-doers.

‘Basically, we have got a bunch of lily-livered wet lettuces in the judiciary who are facing a backlash from liberals’ - Tory MP Phillip Davies

Looting

Vigour The theory is that because of avoidance the Treasury claws in more cash with a 40p rate than 50p.

Sorry, but if the hooray-Henry accountants working for the rich come up with ways of avoiding tax, the Government should be just as quick to shut them up.

And if they find the super rich illegally avoiding tax, then they should be prosecuted with just as much vigour as if they were benefit cheats.

In my book, they are worse than benefit cheats. They have the money - and to lose just a bit of it isn't going to reduce their standard of living one jot.

So they might not have quite so many cruises or quite so many planes, yachts or luxury cars, but hey, who cares.

Everyone, from the super rich to the person in the street, has to suffer his or her fair share of the misery.

Hats off to the Lib Dems, then, for trying to get a mansion tax imposed in the UK. The Tories will oppose it tooth and nail, as they have done in the past. But is it right and just that a person in a £10m mansion pays in council tax only one or two thousand pounds more than a person living in a terraced house?

Yes, I hear the Tories bleating that the person in the mansion is perhaps less likely to be a drain on council services than the person in a terraced house. But it all comes back to

ability to pay, and that's why I always favoured a local income tax. Perhaps people shouldn't have been so quick to condemn it and encourage a local council tax instead which was fixed to benefit the rich the most.

And, just in case you think I have suddenly gone soft in the head and am supporting Socialists, then think again.

Never forget, they were the ones who spent, spent and spent during the good years, getting us so much in the red, sold our gold reserves at rock-bottom prices and failed to properly monitor the antics of rich bankers.

Theirs was an era of collective insanity and we're all suffering the consequences now. Remember it when you are next tempted to put your cross beside a Socialist on a ballot paper.

I've been enjoying the last week in the UK seeing the dregs of society hauled before the courts and sent to prison for their rioting, looting and general mayhem. These are the sorts of sentences that should have been handed out to

We have seen the first case of an appeal judge releasing a woman who had been jailed for five months for receiving the proceeds of looting.

I applaud the views of Tory MP Philip Davies, who said: "This decision comes as no surprise. Basically, we have got a bunch of lily-livered wet lettuces in the judiciary who are facing a backlash from liberals.

"All those who thought that recent events would lead to more robust sentences being handed out will find that this is just an optical illusion. There will soon be a normal resumption of sentences which do nothing to deter people from committing crime."

For far too long, courts have played around with community sentences, conditional discharges and suspended sentences for serious crimes. We have to stop appeals against sentences (not conviction because it's important that there's a proper safeguard against wrongful conviction) and either get rid of the wet lettuces or give them no power to reduce sentences below a prescribed minimum.

And, as I've said many times before, prison should be just that - not a holiday camp - and people should be really frightened of being sent there.

Now for something less heavy. A friend visited a loo in a motorway services and there on the wall was the usual array of condom-vending machines. But right in the middle was a machine vending headache tablets. Now, I ask myself, which is the better contraceptive?

Pedro’s a work of heart THE first patient in Spain to receive a permanent artificial heart was discharged from medical care on Monday.

Pedro Antonio Pérez García, 67, is pictured leaving hospital following the surgery in Madrid in early May. Pedro’s own heart was damaged by a heart attack in the mid-1990s, and other health problems made him unsuitable for a transplant.

He has been implanted with a titanium device which acts as an electrically activated pump to send the blood from his left ventricle to his aorta.

The device is entirely located inside his chest, apart from a small cable which is connected to the control unit.

The control unit has two rechargeable batteries which last for around 12 hours, or it can be plugged into the domestic electricity supply.

The system will reportedly function normally for between eight and 10 years, after which only the electrical pump will need replacing.

It’s understood that more than 6,500 patients in the US and Europe have already benefited from this type of surgery.

Friday, August 26, 2011

HIT MEN! Riot cops face Katerina assault probe

JUST 17 years old, Katerina's eyes fill with tears when she recounts the assault she suffered at the hands of anti-riot officers in Madrid's Calle de Atocha last Thursday.

The video showing how police slapped and beat her and another youngster despite neither of them displaying any aggressive behaviour - is all over the internet.

And it has prompted police HQ to open an internal investigation into whether officers acted disproportionately during protests against the public cost of the Pope's visit to the capital for World Youth Day. Charges by National Police during the secular demonstration in Puerta del Sol last Wednesday night left eight arrested and 11 injured, with further incidents of highhandedness reported at later rallies.

Katerina was among 200 people attending a 15-M movement gathering in the Plaza de Oriente in Madrid on Tuesday to speak about last week's assaults and decide whether to make a collective complaint against the police's actions.

She says she is going to go on attending all 15-M events, though she is not going to go "looking" to be assaulted again.

"You experience it like an eternity," she explained. "I have seen the video and I know it was 30 seconds, but it seemed an awful lot of time to me. I only thought about wanting it to end."

The events leading up to

the video incident recorded on the video began when Katerina attended the Puerta del Sol rally to protest against the heavyhanded policing of the previous night.

The Pope was already in Madrid and one of the major events of the WYD celebrations was under way in Cibeles. After its conclusion, the police restricted access to Sol and enclosed the protestors in the square.

Some WYD pilgrims approached and were rebuked by the demonstrators. One of the most tense moments occurred when a group of Carlists confronted the protestors, causing the police to intervene.

At around 10pm the police drove the demonstrators

ried her away, in the thigh and back. Both are filing complaints.

Theirs may be the most high-profile incident, but it is far from the only one. On Tuesday morning in the Plaza de Oriente a group of journalists complained they had also been the object of attacks by officers while covering the protests.

Faced with the large number of cases, the 15-M movement has decided to create a specific group to deal with the problems relating to the assaults.

The National Police were operating under the order they always receive in these situations: Only employ violence when necessary and as a last resort, but something clearly failed.

Now the Mayhem in o f f i c e r s Madrid over responsible the Pope’s visit could be found guilty of a serious misd e m e a n o u r, punishable by suspension from duty or even dismissal.

O n Monday, the chief and a d e p u t y inspector of the anti-riot from the centre of the unit who allegedly beat square towards Calle de Katerina appeared before Carretas. Katerina said she the internal investigation was paralysed by nerves examiner, who will decide and that was the reason whether to open a disciplithey hit her the first time. nary procedure against the The assault recorded in officers. the video occurred a short Other agents from the while later in Calle de same unit appeared before Atocha. Katerina admits she the investigation on rebuked the officers: "I Tuesday. shouted that they were vioThe main SUP police lent." union condemned the They immediately recog- actions of the officers who nised her from before. "The appear in the images posted chief, the one who slapped on the internet. me, is the one who asked "They have infringed the the others, 'Is it this bitch?'" principles of police conduct," They hit her in the face they said via a statement. and hip and also beat her Amnesty International friend Luis Miguel, who car- also condemned the "indiscrimate" police attacks and has asked for a guarantee that there will an "effective" and "exhaustive" investigation into the matter.

Members of the opposition Popular Party have en masse backed the forcible breaking up of the secular rallies.

Government spokesman and Public Works Minister JosĂŠ Blanco came out in defense of the police's actions, saying he thought there had been nothing excessive.

However, the Socialists later corrected themselves and said that possible police abuses would be investigated by the Government Delegation and the police themselves.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

ANGLO-SPANISH QUIZ HAROLD HEYS with 20 questions to get you thinking

1. In which year did the Second World War start?

2. How did Florence become famous?

Nightingale

8. Louis Bunuel achieved international 15. Alphabetically, which was the last of recognition as what?

Rudolph's reindeer friends?

9. Barcelona beat Manchester United 3- 16. Which gift did Melchior, one of the 1 in the Champions League Final of Three Wise Men, bring?

2011. Who scored the United goal?

17. The opera Carmen is set largely in a 10. In which city was Christopher factory. What was produced there?

Columbus born?

18. What sort of cheese did Wallace and Grommit like?

19. Who did Spain beat in the final of

3. Which Basque sport (also played in Valencia and France) could be described as "squash on a larger court"?

4. Which chess piece can move in any 11. In which country, on the direction but only one square at a time?

Mediterranean, is the port Alexandria?

5. In the game of Monopoly, how much do you collect for passing Go? 12. What is tinto de verano?

6. What colour is heliotrope?

of

the 2010 World Cup in South Africa?

13. What is the highest mountain in 20. Translate: ‘Hola marinero!’

Africa?

7. Madrid and Barcelona are the largest Spanish cities in terms of population.

14. Who runs Postman Pat’s Post Which is the third largest?

Office?

ANSWERS: 1 1939; 2 Nurse (in the Crimea); 3 Pelota; 4 The King; 5 £200; 6 Deep pink-lilac; 7 Valencia; 8 Film maker; 9 Wayne Rooney; 10 Genoa; 11 Egypt; 12 Wine and lemonade; 13 Kilimanjaro; 14 Mrs Goggins; 15 Vixen; 16 Gold; 17 Cigarettes; 18 Wensleydale; 19 Germany; 20 Hello sailor.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

YOU’RE TAKING THE MICKEY, MICKY!

MY opinion of Ryanair has always been consistent. I wouldn’t touch them with an air bridge.

Michael O’Leary’s methods of making money do work – but at the expense of rubbing an awful lot of people up the wrong way. Including me.

What people don’t realise is that Ripoffair’s seemingly low prices are heavily subsidised by those poor people who HAVE to make emergency late bookings for unforeseen emergencies like family bereavements.

And by the millions of families who cannot take vacations off-peak and are forced to pay silly prices to travel during school holiday periods.

My daughter Lisa has just been lumbered with just such a situation – and ended up paying a fortune for a ONE-WAY Ryanair ticket from Alicante to Liverpool for her 15year-old daughter Talia. Plus heaven knows how much more in £1-per-minute Premium Rate phone calls to verify details with arguably the most elusive customer call centre on the planet.

a reissue fee of £40’’, they warn. Forty pounds! How much does it cost Ryanair to print a piece of paper, for heaven’s sake.

Oh, and each boarding pass ‘‘’must be printed and presented on an individual A4 page’’. Get it wrong and it’s gonna cost you again but then, when do O’Leary’s boys NOT take the Micky?

A Cork-based friend of mine travels to Alicante with Ryanair because has no other option. And he reckons their attitude is not one of gratitude for his business but that THEY are doing HIM a favour in providing a service.

Another friend’s experience last year suggests that Ryanair should consider adopting the expression ‘The Customer is Always Wrong’ as their official slogan.

Peak Talia was away with her school in Holland when Lisa and the rest of the family flew out to my place in Spain last week. So she travelled with me on my return from the UK on Monday – on a single Monarch ticket which cost a total of £54.48, including all taxes plus a suitcase. That reservation was made on July 29 – just three weeks before the date of travel.

A very fair price in the peak season, by anyone’s standards.

However, since Talia is 15, she is not allowed to travel alone, so the only way of getting her back to the UK in time for the new school term was to add her to her mother’s party. And they are booked on Ryanair’s Alicante to Liverpool run next Monday.

I had tried to make Talia’s reservation

Return

Counting the cost: Talia with mum Lisa and her Ryanair boarding pass

Why Ryanair’s cheap tricks don’t fool me while I was in England, but Ryanair’s online booking service, unaware that she would be on the same flight as her mother, predictably rejected the booking with a message that under-16s cannot travel alone.

The only option remaining was for Lisa to add Talia to her travelling party herself, which she eventually managed to do – but by now it was only10 days before the date of travel.

Enter Michael Skybandit O’Leary and his rip-off boys, rubbing their hands with glee.

What would be a fair price to pay for a one-way ticket from Alicante to Liverpool in late August? The £54.48 charged by Monarch? No, that would be incredibly cheap. Say100 euros, then - 120 top whack?

No chance. For the pleasure of travelling one way from Alicante to Liverpool, with absolutely no frills, Lisa was fleeced for

228.99 euros – or £212.84 sterling at Ryanair’s.

A predictably miserable exchange rate.

And still the expense was not over, because Talia had to be booked as an Adult to circumvent the system – and Lisa then had to call the Rip-offair office to switch the documentation to Child.

That in itself took three days, which won’t surprise most of you.

Ripoff-air even managed to include a €6 administration fee – presumably for the extra work involved in counting the money.

Plus another €6 for web check-in. Does that mean Talia can check in for free at the airport…before Ripoff-airs jobsworths tell her she can’t take her hand luggage on board because the bag is 4mm too wide?

Ryanair’s sharp practices are not even clever. ‘‘Passengers who do not present a boarding pass at the airport will be charged

My pal Andres Ballesteros, whose English is adequate but not perfect, paid on line for a return ticket from Liverpool to Alicante for his UK-based son – only to realise almost immediately that he had booked the flights back to front.

It was clearly a genuine mistake but Andres, who lives in El Altet, accepted he’d have to fork out another 20 euros or so to have the dates reversed. But when he phoned Ryanair’s call centre, a dismissive female operator told him haughtily: ‘‘It’s your mistake. You’ll just have to pay again’’.

Consequently, poor Andres had to rebook both flights, more than doubling the cost and adding a tasty bonus to O’Leary’s greed machine. World’s Most Popular Airline?

World’s Least Caring Airline more likely.

Lisa reckons Ryanair have made a total of around £250 out of Talia’s single fare. No frills? At that price, my granddaughter should be getting all the frills of every inflated fare O’Leary has pocketed all summer.

PS: I just took a look at Monarch’s website in order to make a direct comparison with Ryanair - and guess what? A one-way ticket from Alicante to Manchester on Monday (August 29) would cost me €420.50! I stand corrected - it seems that when it comes to holiday time, the fly-boys are all as bad as each other.

Utility futility...it’s such a waste of Energia I CAN truly sympathise with the nightmare experience of El Raso couple Bob and Sue Kemp at the hands of HC Energia’s incompetent bunglers.

Because the same company also cut my electricity off soon after I moved to the area in 2006 - though thankfully they didn’t remove the meter.

Unlike in the UK, you don’t get a second chance to pay where HC Energia are concerned. And if your bank dares to reject a direct debit request, it’s a fair bet you’ll be feeling your way around in the dark the same night.

Many Spanish utility companies with-

draw their service off without notification when payments are not met on the due date. Whatever the reason.

My ‘sin’ was similar to that of the Kemps. I had no idea there were insufficient funds in the account to meet one of HC Energia’s early bills, so instead of notifying me they brought down the axe.

However, in my case they did it several months later - by which time all my payments were going through merrily.

Unfortunately, it seems the company

didn’t think of re-submitting the payment request. That would have been too easy.

Fortunately I was in the UK at the time - as were the Kemps for most of the time.

And thank goodness for that.

The thought of an entire Costa Blanca summer with no refrigeration or air conditioning facilities is just unbearable.

I only knew my own supply had been cut off when my keyholder rang me in Manchester to say there was a notice on my front door in big red letters.

It took me perhaps five days (plus copious amounts of stress) for the service to be restored...and apart from the recon-

nection charge, no further harm was done. Unless you count the fact that I couldn’t boot HC Energia out of my life because they were the only electricity suppliers in the area.

Unbelievably, I am still with the same suppliers, even though I do now have alternatives.

But in the absence of evidence that Iberdrola and Co are any more sympathetic, I’m sticking to the devil I know. As long as my meter’s still there, that is...

Have YOU had your electricity, gas or water cut off unfairly? Email office@thecourier.es and tell us the details.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Friday, August 26, 2011

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Friday, August 26, 2011

A COBBLED street in Manchester, England. October 1945. Times are hard.

Mother is sitting on her front step, plucking a chicken for tea, when she spies a figure marching down the street towards her, a kitbag over his shoulder.

It is my Dad returning home from the war.

Mother shrieks with joy, flings the semi-scalped bird high into the sky and rushes into Dad's arms.

It is like the final scene in a romantic film - apart from the dead chicken on Dad's head.

Anyway, mother and father walked hand-in-hand into the house.

They had eyes only for each other, which is probably why they fell over grandpa's bicycle silently rusting away in the hall.

Dad had spent more than four years fighting the foe in foreign lands and had got through it all without a scratch.

Within five minutes of arriving home he had been almost decked by a deceased domestic fowl and had badly bruised his big toe on a protruding bit of old bike.

Go figure.

All this happened before I was born but the wheels were set in motion for my creation that very night.

(Say no more. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge . . . but mind that toe.)

A few weeks after their joyful yet painful reunion, mother told father she had an announcement to make which would delight him.

'This afternoon, my dear, I am preparing you your favourite meal. Corned beef fritters. Oh, and by the way, I'm pregnant.'

Dad's face broke into a huge grin. 'Mmm . . . fritters.' He sounded just like Homer Simpson . . . er . . . whoever he was.

A KNIGHT TO REMEMBER 'Do you mind!' I exclaim. 'Who's telling this story?' Anyway, I was so excited by the movie that when I got home I decided I would become Sir Lancelot.

In the absence of armour, I jammed one of mother's saucepans on my head.

My troubles started when I tried to get the pan off. It was stuck on my bonce and wouldn't budge.

Mother said to Dad: 'You'll have to take our David to the hospital to get it removed. I would have left it until tomorrow but I'm making gravy tonight.'

Dad protested. 'But I can't walk our Ida through the streets with his head stuck in a pan.

'For a start the pan's over his eyes and he can't see. And secondly, the neighbours CAN see and they'll giggle.'

Mother thought the problem through. 'I'll tell you what. Stretch our David's pink balaclava over his head so that it hides the pan.

Confused

Impending As the months progressed mother kept herself busy knitting garments for the impending arrival.

Plucking chickens during wartime had worked wonders for the dexterity of her digits.

'But why is every item of clothing pink?' asked Dad, puzzled.

Mother sighed. 'Pink for a girl, silly. Our new baby is going to be called Davida.'

'Oh,' said Dad. Then he thought a bit and said: 'But what if it's a boy?’ Mother smiled at Dad's seeming inability to work things out. 'Then all we have to do is shorten the name Davida.'

'Oh', said Dad. Then he thought a bit more, turned ashen and said: 'You really intend to call our son Ida?' Mother flung down the half-finished matinee jacket in exasperation at Dad's strange thought processes when it came to subtracting letters from names.

'If we have a son he will be called David. But I'm not wasting all this wool. He'll still have to wear pink.'

Wednesday, August 21, 1946. On the same day Princess Margaret celebrated her 16th birthday I made my debut, bottom-first.

Mother had an exhausting time of it and her mood wasn't helped by Dad's first words when he entered the maternity ward.'I've had a terrible day at work,' he remarked.

Whoops! Things you wish you hadn't said . . .

'Meet your son, dear,' mother said through gritted teeth - and had to be restrained from chucking her little bundle of joy at him.

One of my early memories is of Dad taking me to the cinema to see Knights of the Round Table with Hollywood star Robert Taylor.

My wife, Mrs S, has just sniggered. 'You make it sound like Robert Taylor actually went to the pictures with you. Ever thought of going on a writing course?'

'Then turn the hat around so that the big hole is at the back with the pan's handle sticking out.

'Then just grab hold of the handle and steer our David all the way to outpatients.'

Mother noted Dad's confused look. 'Look, it's not Rubik's Cube,' she snapped. 'Er . . . whatever that is.'

We set off, Dad and I, along the cobbled street.

When we got to the main road, Dad knocked with his knuckles on the pan and yelled: 'Take a left, Ida!' 'Okay, dad,' I answered in a strange echoing voice.

I must have sounded like a Dalek . . . er . . . whatever that was.

I could just about hear my father grumbling away behind me as he clung on to the pan's handle.

'I have never been so embarrassed,' he muttered.

'But at least your pink balaclava has stayed on and we haven't bumped into someone important like the vicar.'

At the next 'Take a left, Ida' we bumped into the vicar.

At the same moment the pink balaclava snagged on a tree branch, unravelled and came off.

'My goodness,' said the reverend, surveying the strange sight before him. 'What are you and your David up to?'

Dad uttered a quick prayer under his breath and his plea was answered by return.

'Why,' he said, 'I'm just taking our Ida to a fancy dress party. ‘He's going as Peter Pan.'

Friday, August 26, 2011

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Friday, August 26, 2011

ROMA’S PASSPORT TO Left to starve...because SURVIVAL she has no sale value THE Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre is a registered charity dedicated to saving abused and abandoned horses, ponies and donkeys and then providing a safe caring environment for them. The charity has no official funding and relies completely on public support and donations. This is the story of their 39th and newest equine resident...

THIS is Roma. Saved from a slow death by a very caring lady.

However, as the horse’s rescuer does not have the facilities or space the animal needs, she contacted the Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre to give Roma a home and the care and medical attention she needs.

Why,you might ask, are so many horses being left this way? The main reason is the Horse Passport.

Now every horse in Spain has to have a microchip and a passport. There are hundreds that do not and Roma is one of them - so she and all the others are illegal. This means she cannot be legally transported, sold, kept in a livery yard or sold for meat (yes, that happens here) or even to be humanly disposed of.

This is why hundreds of horses like Roma are being left to starve to death, hidden away in old buildings or on plots of waste land. Because they have no value.

Most people do not realise that to have a horse put to sleep and the body taken away in a sanitation lorry for incineration costs at least €450. Again this is only possible if the animal is legal.

It is against the law to bury a horse.

There are around 9,000 registered horses in our region and about three times as many that are not.

Yes, of course we are going to help Roma but we need all the help and support we can get for the Rescue Centre to continue its work.

Roma will make it 39 horses and donkeys living here and

STARVING TO DEATH: But Roma now has a home and a future unfortunately there are many more that need help.

Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre is open to visitors every day from 1pm till 4pm with open days on Wednesdays and Sundays, when you can have a guided tour and meet our residents and hear their stories and enjoy a light lunch or refreshment in the café garden. All proceeds go towards the support of the Rescue Centre.

For more information and a map with directions visit www.easyhorsecare.net or call Sue on 652 021 980

Can you give Hope hope?

HOPE is a three-month old Papillion cross and was born with a hole in her heart. Sometimes a puppy born with this can live a full and normal life and it is hoped that she will, too. Typically playful, she loves attention. It is best if she is goes to a new home with no other dogs. Tel: 630 853 597 www.petsinspain.info

THE RENTAL REVOLUTION They’re thinking ahead at Alicante Town Hall...

Alicante finds answer to housing problems

By SALLY BENGTSSON LET’S hope other town halls take note. Alicante’s municipal government have managed to match up the fact that there is a huge surplus of unsold, ready-to-live-in apartments and large numbers of youngsters unable to afford to buy or rent a home.

Let’s all do La Concha...

LA CONCHA residents could well be doing the Conga on Monday - because they’re having a Euro Night Party and BBQ in the Pool Garden from 6pm.

La Concha Social Group in Las Mimosas have organised the event, with music all night, to raise funds for Paul Cunningham Nurses.

Entrance fee for Euro Night is €5, which entitles everyone to something from the barbecue, along with a drink and a quiz

sheet.

There will also be the ever-popular Play Your Cards Right, a raffle and an auction, a bar with all drinks at €1 plus further food, also at just one euro. Entrance for children is free!

La Concha is near La Florida - with the landmark of the Horatio Bar. Everyone is welcome and if you’re not quite sure where La Concha is, give Maxine a call on 965 319 123. She’s a whizz at directions!

Since 2005, Alicante’s department of housing has been running a programme to help both sides, and even act as a go between.

And lately this programme has really taken off.

An enormous number of new houses have remained unsold locally for years, while a multitude of youngsters have been unable to find a home they can afford.

The town hall has managed to persuade sellers that it is in their interest to rent their properties.

If a house remains empty for years, it is surely better to receive some income from it and also have someone looking after it.

At present, the housing office has three

different plans: 1. Houses for youngsters, aimed at those under 35 who cannot afford a home.

2. A project to revitalise the area, which offers homes in the old quarters of Alicante.

3. The North of Alicante plan, which offers flats to all those who fulfil the necessary requirements.

While local government elsewhere seems to insist on unveiling wonderful projects of low cost housing for youngsters, Alicante is being more sensible and making the best of what it already has.

ALHAMA de Murcia town hall has published architectural plans for the Paramount Theme Park, which are available for public viewing at the Urbanisation Office.

Objectors have until September 2 to make their complaints known. If there are none, the construction work will commence.

The Mayor has commented on the urgency of beginning the project.

The same town hall has also approved the modification of the Plan Parcial "Sierra de Alhama Golf Resort”, details of which will also be on display for 15 days.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Wanted - office volunteers HELP Association Vega Baja officials are looking for extra volunteers to man their office in Torrevieja.

Office hours are Monday to Friday between 10am and 13.30pm. The main tasks involved will include dealing with queries and giving help and advice, either in person or on the telephone.

The Association helps people of all ages, with all sorts of problems. They operate a 24-hour helpline (965 704 282) and their aim

is to assist in practical ways at times of crisis, or when police or medical services are involved.

If you think you can help by giving us one or two mornings a week, or if you would like to understand more fully exactly what is being are asked of you, please contact Richard in the San Miguel office on 966 723 733.

The office is open Monday to Friday 10am to 1.30pm.

Swingtet Plus tune up for some Big Band action

It’s Big Band time again!

BIG Band Dance Nights return to the area next month with a new season of exquisite entertainment.

The dates to put in your diaries are Thursday September 15 and Thursday October 20 at the Hotel Costa Narejos, Los Alcazares.

The entertainment runs from 9pm to 11.30pm and features the Swingtet-Plus 10-piece band with a very Big Band sound. And this season the very popular Patti Ross becomes the new featured vocalist.

The line-up of talented musicians is: Trumpets - John Butson, Inge Sunde, John Atkins; Trombone - Andy Briant; Saxes - Gil Monks (band-leader) alto, Mike Hutchins - tenor, Gloria Grimshaw baritone; Piano - Enrique Simon; Bass Geoff Hull; Drums - Arthur Buck.

Proceeds of the evenings’ raffles will be presented to Help Murcia Mar Menor Cancer Support Group.

Admission, by ticket only, is €6, available from this week at the Hotel reception.

Tel: 968 583 980

MARIA’S SILVER LINEN

Dartboard fun-raiser realises €790 MARIA WILSON and her Pink Ladies held a threeday fund-raising event in aid of the AEC cancer charity this week at the invitation of the Yorkshire Linen company.

Raising much-needed funds for AECC became fun thanks to Phil at Yorkshire Linen, who offered his customers the

chance earn discount on their purchases by hitting an even number on a dartboard.

The one euro fee was given to the Pink Ladies for AECC, who also ran a raffle over the three days with fabulous prizes donated by Phil and his Yorkshire Linen team.

A total of €310 was rai-

sed from the darts, €150 from the raffle and Yorkshire Linen donated a further €330, giving a grand total of €790.

Maria and her Pink Ladies would like to thank Phil and all his Yorkshire Linen team for all their efforts and kindness in helping to raise this money for AECC.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

COUNTRY STRONG 12 2009's "Crazy Heart", was the story of an old country music singer (played by Jeff Bridges) whose personal problems prevent him from making a successful comeback.

"Country Strong" features a similar story, but this time the singer is female.

Gwyneth Paltrow is Kelly Canter. She's a former country superstar whose career ended badly. She has a drinking problem and is trying to deal with a tragic event that changed her life forever. With the help of her husband/manager (Tim McGraw), Kelly returns to singing and goes back on

tour, hoping to get back to the top. Leighton Meester plays Chiles Stanton, an upand-coming singer who wants to be a star, and hopes to make it happen on Kelly's tour. A young songwriter, played by Garrett Hedlund, is also on the tour.

The movie centres on the relationships between these four characters.

The plot of "Country Strong" is a little more complicated than I would have guessed from seeing the trailers.

There are some early twists which make the story less predictable than I thought it would be.

The story doesn't focus on

Paltrow's character as much as was expected. it would've been nice to have seen more scenes of her and McGraw's character together and less of the other two. At times, this movie is heartwarming and hopeful, and other times it's sad and a little depressing.

The songs are likeable and memorable, and are all performed by the

actors, which is pretty impressive. In fact, the only one of the main actors who doesn't sing on camera is McGraw - WHO'S THE ONLY REAL SINGER! Paltrow gives a terrific performance, and you really care for her character. The rest of the performances are solid.

Yes, it's cheesy and perhaps predictable at times but it is also fun and very touching.

The human elements that Feste was able to tap into in this movie work amongst the

amazing music, which fits the film like an old pair of boots. In the end, "Country Strong" is not the best film of the year, but it is a strong piece of melodrama with excellent performances by its cast and an equally impressive soundtrack to match.

Cast: Gwyneth Paltrow, Leighton Meester, Garrett Hedlund, Tim McGraw Director: Shana Feste Genre: Drama Rating: 3/5 Running Time: 112 min.

This dvd review was brought to you by MOVING MOVIES - OVER 7000 DVDS IN STOCK. Delivering all over Spain and the UK Visit www.movingmovies.biz Tel 650 751 072 or email movingmoviesdvds@gmail.com

Visit our display at the Indoor British Market/Auction Room at Formentera.

Friday, August 26, 2011

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THE LOST WORLD OF TONY BLAH… ANTHONY Charles Lynton Blair has surfaced again from his lair, like a panto villain getting ready to appear at a very early dress rehearsal ahead of the festive season.

His Cheshire Cat grin must have been gurning all over his computer keyboard as he decided to type some rare com-

anybody within hearing range?

I could go on with things like under-age drinking and the spread of drugs, but couldn’t Blair have shown just the tiniest bit of humility and admitted that something just might have gone wrong with the social fabric of the country when he was Prime Minister?

If he clearly had nothing of any worth to say, he might as well have not bothered powering up his computer to type such tripe. But then, perhaps he fancied an easy pay cheque from a Sunday newspaper…

LIBYAN LIABILITY It’s been great to see the dramatic events unfolding in the last week in Libya, but I wonder if the new administration will be able to right an appalling wrong?

I’m talking about the Lockerbie bomber, Al-Megrahi, who was released two years ago by Alex Salmond’s Scottish Government on the grounds that he was dying of cancer.

Nothing surely of course to do with lucrative oil contracts as a spineless Gordon Brown refused to criticise the decision, preferring to wash his hands of it all.

Can I suggest that the new masters of Tripoli say thankyou for NATO’s aerial support, by forcibly bundling AlMegrahi onto an American-bound plane. There the appropriate lynch mobs will be waiting for him Stateside, as Scottish politicians and justice proved to be not fit for purpose?

NICE LITTLE GURNER: Cheshire Cat Tony Blair ments about the British domestic scene for last Sunday‘s Observer in the wake of the recent riots. And what a piece of self-denial it was.

To sum it all up…“It’s not my fault, guv!”.

Blair’s ten-year tenure as Prime Minister was apparently a decade of milk and honey, as he claimed that Britain is not in a period of moral decline. Really?

Blair claims that he made things so much better and that the current generation is “more respectable, responsible and hard-working” than his own.

He then goes on to blame his successor Gordon Brown, and then David Cameron for not pursuing his ideas of strengthening the family unit, and that these problems are around in every developed nation.

What ideas did Blair produce and introduce on that, because I must be suffering from a very nasty case of amnesia!

Didn’t he walk the corridors of power as teenage pregnancies went through the roof, along with yobs laying siege to UK shopping areas and bad-mouthing

AL-MEGRAHI: Let the Americans deal with him

some almost speaking in a black/rap accent.

For saying this, the ‘Wrath of Khan’ has descended upon him, led by Ed Miliband branding Starkey as a racist and incorrectly equating his remarks to Enoch Powell’s famous ‘Rivers of Blood’ speech in 1968.

A group of soft-spoken middle class lefties have crawled out of the woodwork to plunge the knife into Starkey, even having the nerve to suggest that his remarks were some kind of ‘career-ender’. That’s really wishful thinking on their part.

Remember that Starkey is an articulate man of the rightwing, so his detractors are looking for any excuse to mischief-make, whilst failing to acknowledge their own mistakes.

A RACE APART Every time anybody says there is too much immigration or What is it about the UK that nobody wants an intelligent that racial integration is failing, they are immediately branddebate over issues like race relations and immigration? ed as racist.

Take the outspoken and always entertaining historian, All candidates at the last General Election were being told David Starkey. A couple of weeks ago, he appeared on the on the doorstep that immigration was a big issue, but the BBC’s Newsnight programme and made some perfectly rea- voters were just brushed aside as fodder in many cases. sonable points over gang culture. He said that some MPs Who can forget the real brusque side of Gordon Brown, like Diane Abbott and David Lammy are behaving more like sitting in the apparent security of his car, as he rubbished a white people in their attitudes, and that white youths are lady in Rochdale who was genuinely concerned by the influx behaving as blacks in the way they absorb gang culture, of East Europeans into her area.

Starkey said last weekend that a lot of the British public were fed up with being treated like children over the discussion of race and gangs, and that there was almost an unholy alliance between the politicians and large sections of the media to prevent the discussion of the subject in a grown up way.

One reason Labour lost the election 16 months ago was that they refused to listen over this subject - and Ed Miliband, who has made his mark in recent weeks, has got this all wrong. Surely the Labour leader ought to agree that if these subjects don’t get talked about sensibly, then the vile poison of Nick Griffin and his goose-stepping BNP mates will find their memberMen of their times: David Starkey (left) and Enoch Powell ship numbers swelling significantly.

POPE’S VISIT A REAL STORMER

By Sally Bengtsson

POPE Benedict XVI returned to Rome on Sunday night after his four-day visit to Spain, which was hailed as a massive success.

An estimated 1.5 million pilgrims gathered in Madrid from all over the world for the Roman Catholic Church's World Youth Day celebrations.

The Pontiff’s visit was not short of drama, though. What with a Mexican national arrested for threatening to gas all those who protested against the visit, and a violent storm which brought down part of one of the marquees at the event, injuring seven participants, the gathering will be remembered for a variety of reasons.

The storm did bring some refreshing rain to the masses of sweltering young people, many of whom had to be treated for heat exhaustion.

This was Pope Benedict's third World Youth Day. The gathering of young Catholics from around the world once every three years was launched 25 years ago by Pope John Paul II, in a bid to reinvigorate and spread the faith among the young.

Observers said it felt like a week-long rock concert and camping trip, with bands of flag-toting pilgrims roaming Madrid's otherwise empty streets, to take part in prayer and education sessions, Masses, cultural outings and papal

events.

At the end of Sunday's Mass, the Pope announced that the next World Youth Day will be in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, in 2013 - a year early to avoid conflicts with the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.

The 84-year-old Pontiff said he hoped to attend, and Brazilians in the crowd jumped, whooped and cheered.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

WHAT THE SPAN

MURCIA BLAZE ‘WAS ARSON’ A HUGE wildfire caused 2,500 Murcian residents to be evacuated from their homes last Friday.

With the hot weather having dried out vegetation, a tiny spark can become lethal in a matter of seconds.

The strong, hot winds meant that when the fire took root, it spread in a flash, and at one point the advancing flames were five kilometres across.

One of the worst affected areas was the Calblanque national park near Cartagena, where La Manga starts.

Fire-fighting planes were brought in to drop water on the flames in a bid to

By SALLY BENGTSSON

bring them under control.

In all, 351 soldiers and 80 vehicles were brought in to assist, along with nine helicopters.

The fire was finally extinguished after firefighters battled through the night.

However, neighbours woke up to the news that it had been deliberately started.

Rafael González Tovar, a councillor for the Murcian government, said there was conclusive evidence that the fire was the work of a pyromaniac.

Firefighters found a device made from special matches and flammable cloth.

Customs men swoop on cannabis boats A TON of cannabis was recovered by customs officials from a boat which was boarded off Villajoyosa on Monday.

The two-man crew, both Spanish, have been arrested and further arrests have not been ruled out by the National Police.

On the same day, two more boats were boarded off the Valencian coast and their cargoes of cannabis seized. Each was believed to be carrying a ton of the drug.

Officers suspect that all three boats could have been supplied by a mother ship further out at sea.

Some 420 acres of parkland was destroyed in the blaze, which spread to within 800 metres of La Manga golf club.

Gonzalez sent a clear message to the arsonists that if their objective was to change the use of the damaged land, they would not get their way. He said the area will remain natural park and not be changed to urbanisable land.

The sad thing is that the area damaged had a huge ecological richness.

Those evacuated were allowed to return to their homes the following day.

Fortunately only one home suffered damage from the flames.

A SPANISH multi-millionaire is apparently prepared to pay €2.4 MILLION to Christina Aguilera (above) for the US star to stage a private concert for him.

He wants her to fly over to Spain for the performance, but it is not known when or exactly

where it would take place. The identity of her mega-rich fan also remains a mystery. What is known is that the concert will be a rather short one, since it will reportedly only include four songs, each costing him more than half a million euros.

Zara suppliers ‘used slave labour’

By SALLY BENGTSSON IN A story similar to that faced by Primark last year, a Brazilian manufacturer who produces goods for Spanish clothing giant Zara has been accused of making foreign employees work in conditions "similar to slavery".

The Brazilian daily Jornal do Brasil quoted the country’s Under-Secretary for Labour Inspection, Renato Bigami, as saying infractions discovered in two factories in the north of São Paulo included excessively long working hours and a lack of hygiene.

The workers affected, one of whom is only 14, were from Bolivia and Peru.

The supplier also forced workers to pay back debts incurred in their transportation to Brazil.

The irregularities were discovered in raids carried out at the end of June.

The inspections reportedly found 16 workers who were unregistered in breach of the company's code of conduct

for its suppliers. The Spanish firm did not name the supplier.

The workers affected are due compensation of 65,000 euros, which Inditex said would be paid entirely by the supplier. The Spanish company has ordered the supplier to cease the illegal practices.

Inditex has 50 suppliers in Brazil, which employ some 7,000 workers.

The Spanish company said it would work with the Brazilian authorities to reinforce its system of inspections for its suppliers in Brazil.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

NISH PAPERS SAY

CHE’S MOTORBIKE PARTNER DIES AGED 88

RUSSIAN POOL-ETTE!

THE ridiculous craze of “balconing” almost claimed yet another life last week, this time in Palma de Mallorca.

In a story which repeats itself on a regular basis, a young man returned to his hotel room after a night of heavy drinking and decided to gamble with his life by jumping into the hotel pool from his balcony.

Luckily he managed to land in the water, and was only slightly injured. Had he not been so fortunate, his game of Russian roulette could have left him permanent damaged or even dead.

Despite stark warnings from hotels and authorities, the practice of "balconing" has raised its head again to the Balearic Islands.

‘Balconing’ craze almost takes another life Mystery of UFOs over Catalonia

THREE bright orbs were clearly visible in the early evening sky over Spain during a UFO sighting last Thursday.

The multiple UFOs hovered above Catalonia in the early evening and a witness recorded the unidentified objects on video.

The three UFOs hovered over a residential area for more than six minutes, as evidenced by the video documenting the event. The objects appeared to be the same shape, round or spherical, and all glowed with the same pulsating colourchanging light.

During the short period of time that they were being recorded, they alternately emitted white, yellow, orange, and red light. The UFOs were not in a straight line, and did not remain in formation.

At one point, toward the end of the video, the three UFOs move very close together with one of them nearly obscuring the camera's view of another.

Jumping It consists of drunken tourists jumping from balcony to balcony in their hotels, or jumping from their rooms into the swimming pool.

It's a highly dangerous activity which has already seen three tragic endings this summer.

The last fatality involved a 20-year-old Italian girl, who died after jumping from a fourth-floor balcony of a Palma hotel at the beginning

ck a tt a r a b in d e b b ta s , 3 Briton, 5 53 and a A BRITISH man aged Czech 28-year-old from the d in ate tre ing be Republic are at ital sp ho t tric dis the ed bb sta ing be Villajoyosa after broke out during a brawl which early on Pi in a bar in Alfaz del Sunday.

r indicaLa Verdad newspape es are uri inj ir the t tes tha red to ide ns co serious but not . ing en eat be life thr med in Neither man was na

reports. place at The stabbings took d 7.30 un aro at a bar in El Albir

in the morning. ia Civil On Monday, the Guard year19a reportedly arrested in bia lom old youth from Co s. ing bb sta connection with the in ce pla The arrest took Benidorm.

LUCKY ESCAPE: Harvey Hoyte-Bone from Surrey plummeted 70ft from a hotel balcony in Palma, Majorca this summer and suffered a broken leg of the month. Others have had better luck.

Last Friday, a 21-year-old tourist – not British - was seriously injured after jumping from the balcony of his hotel in Palma. He was only on the second floor, but the impact was enough to fracture his skull as well as break a number of other bones.

Jumping The same day, a 20-yearold British man broke his arm after jumping from his hotel room in Magaluf, in Mallorca.

The craze seems to be most popular in the Spanish islands. Hoteliers in Ibiza say they have done all they can to adapt their buildings to British legislation, including higher railings on balconies.

But they say they cannot "imprison their customers," and are calling for campaigns in other countries to warn tourists of the dangers.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

HE MAN PIQUÉ IS Oh baby, it’s joy ALL THE FASHION for our Amanda

Barcelona defender and boyfriend of Shakira, Gerard Piqué, is the new face of Mango menswear line 'HE by Mango' GERARD PIQUÉ, defensive hero of Spain’s World Cup victory and Barcelona’s European Championship success, has now become a fashion icon.

The statuesque, unshaven, blue-eyed Spaniard, who is dating Colombian popstar Shakira, sports a smart grey flannel suit in one shot, before getting casual in a variety of trench coats and leather jackets for the others.

Launched in 2008, Mango's men's line has been a bit under the radar, but owing to Piqué's high profile and popularity with men and women alike, this campaign should change that.

"I have followed fashion since I was 15 or 16. I like it and I trust my fashion sense," says Piqué, "but when I do a major campaign like this one, I let the experts advise me".

HE is built around updated classics for everyday and urban life and is aimed at young and fashion-conscious men.

With Piqué ruled out of today’s (Friday) European Super Cup match against Porto, perhaps he'll have time to squeeze in a few more modelling assignments.

TELLY'S Amanda Holden is expecting a baby girl - just months after tragically losing her unborn son.

The Britain's Got Talent judge, 40, and her husband, music producer Chris Hughes, announced the news on Tuesday.

According to The Sun, Amanda told fiveyear-old daughter Lexi: "Mama is pregnant!

Yay." Mum-to-be Amanda and her husband were "beyond thrilled" last night after announcing their heart-warming baby news.

She is due to give birth to the couple's daughter next spring.

Her pregnancy follows the loss of an unborn son in February this year - and a miscarriage the previous year.

Jubilant Amanda said yesterday: "Chris and I are delighted to announce that I am pregnant and we are expecting a little girl.

The star has not confirmed the exact date when her baby is due, but has passed the three-month stage and plans to step down from her stage role in Shrek two months early in October.

She told fans she may even quit before then if she feels it is putting too much strain on her pregnancy. ry Amanda said: "I will be putting myself and this pregnancy first. I've taken medical advice and, although I am a strong girl and

this is 'once again' a good healthy pregnancy, I will absolutely not be taking any risks."

She later tweeted, above: "Lexi's question of the day (and most days) 'Mama when are you going to get a baby in your tummy?'

Happy to say TODAY Lexi! Mama is pregnant! Yay." After being deluged with messages of congratulations - including two from celeb pals Myleene Klass and Emma Bunton - she wrote: "OMG! Am overwhelmed with all your tweets! Thank you Thank you Thank you!!!

Am thrilled and terrified all rolled into one."

Brave Amanda had thrown herself into work commitments - including judging Britain's Got Talent and her role as Princess Fiona in Shrek - following her heartbreaking loss in February.

Jobs resigns as Apple CEO

STEVE Jobs, one of the original “geeks” who helped launch global giant Apple from his garage, last night quit as chief executive of the conglomerate.

The 56-year-old Silicon Valley supremo had taken leave for a year as he battled pancreatic cancer before returning to work at Apple.

But on Wednesday he announced he was stepping down.

Jobs said last night: “I’ve always said if there ever came a day when I could no longer meet my duties and expectations as Apple’s CEO, I’d be the first to let you know.

Unfortunately, that day has come. I hereby resign as CEO of Apple.”

Three cheers for Mar Azul’s ‘A’ team!

Mar Azul International School had something to celebrate this week when their first ever A Level examination results were published on Thursday August 18.

Anxious students and teachers were gathered early at the school gates to collect the long awaited results but their worries proved unfounded as student after student achieved beyond their expectations.

This is the first year that Mar Azul International School has taught A Levels, considered by many to be the gold standard of all qualifications and thus it was with great delight that the school hit the national average with a 97% pass rate – not bad for a small community school in its first year of teaching at this level.

It is not surprising that Mar Azul School wants to broadcast its achievements as it is the only private school in the area who do not insist on students sitting an entrance exam.

The school accepts pupils from all walks of life who have been in either Spanish or English education as well as children with Special Educational Needs.

The school’s underpinning philosophy has always been to encourage individual students to maximise their full potential and to celebrate individual successes – however small.

Mar Azul offers A Levels in Art and Design, English Literature, Geography, Human Biology, Mathematics, Sociology and Spanish to compliment its ever expanding portfolio of BTEC National qualifications in Art and Design, Business, Child Development and Sport.

Students taking the BTEC qualifications are also on line to achieve great results when they complete their courses next year.

Head teacher, Rachel Pestell announced: “I am absolutely delighted that our students have achieved such wonderful results. Not all of our pupils are blessed with grade A ability and it is largely due to their own sterling efforts and positive work ethic together with the unceasing dedication and commitment of our teaching staff. ‘‘They have every reason to celebrate.

This has given the school a great confidence boost that we are teaching to a high standard and we can’t wait to see the GCSE results which are released this Thursday, August 25.”

It is not too late to enrol into Mar Azul International School and College. For further information or an appointment, call 965 720 785. The office is open from 9am to 2pm throughout August or you can visit the website, which is at www.marazulinternationalschool.com

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Friday, August 26, 2011

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Play it again, Flam THROUGH this letter could you please pass on our thanks to the Town Hall at Playa Flamenca for the super fiesta we were all able to enjoy last weekend.

We have family over from England at the moment, from teenagers through to our age (mid 50s), and we can honestly say we were spoilt for choice. The fiesta programme was studied religiously every day to make sure we could take part in or attend as many of the events as possible.

My family agreed the highlight for us was the firework display, which was absolutely fan-

FABULOUS FIESTA SPOILT MY FAMILY FOR CHOICE tastic! Even the closing fiesta speech by a young man was held in English so we could all understand – a perfect finish to a perfect weekend.

I can only say thank you, Town Hall! Finally the fiesta comes to us and we, the residents on the coast, were able to be “host” to our neighbours in town and other visitors.

Although, to be fair, since the new government took over, bus transport has been arranged to enable us to attend the fiestas in Orihuela town – even for Entre Naranjos!

Well done to the people who arranged the fiesta and the Moore family is looking forward very much to the next one!

SUE MOORE, Cabo Roig

THE PARTY AND THE POOPERS...

CAN you please advise me who or where to go so I can receive the correct information and advice? I am a bar owner in Cabo Roig and I add a law-abiding bar owner!

I am fed up of being hounded – yes, literally hounded – by the Policia Local.

Everybody is aware that business is not good at the moment and you do not have to be a rocket scientist to know that there are only a couple of weeks left of main season to try and make a living.

I, and fellow bar owners, ask ourselves why do the Policia

Local and the Town Hall at Playa Flamenca make our lives so difficult?

We are constantly warned about our opening times and noise levels and now the Town Hall has banned us from distributing flyers advertising our businesses.

How come, then, that the Town Hall allowed the all night party (until 06:00 in the morning!!) on the old market place car park in Campoamor recently?

Rumour has it they even provided the stage and electricity and live music was

played until very late – or very early in this case.

Did the noise and mess not disturb the residents and holidaymakers in Campoamor?

Or because this party was organised by the Town Hall, did the Policia Local turn a blind eye?

I admit the flyers we distribute do get thrown away and left on the ground but that is nothing compared to the mess (and other waste without going into too much detail) that approximately 6,000 partygoers left behind.

Who tidied up, and most

importantly paid, for the cleaning up session afterwards?

Us, the tax payers?

Please advise me who I should speak to regarding these double standards. The Town Hall and Policia Local seem to watch us (the bar and restaurant owners) like hawks yet less than one kilometre away, in a residential area, the Town Hall themselves organise an “all night rave” – where is the justice? Please do not print my name for obvious reasons.

FRUSTRATED BUSINESSMAN, Cabo Roig

Freed Lawrence killer cleared of cash-machine intimidation THE killer of headmaster Philip Lawrence has been cleared of using his notoriety to intimidate and rob a young man at a cash machine.

Learco Chindamo, 31, allegedly accosted David Sexton and ordered him to hand over his money.with the words: "Do you remember about the headteacher in Maida Vale?"

The 31-year-old had only been released from prison for the 1995 murder some four months before the confrontation in north London, jurors were told.

But following the collapse of three previous trials, he was acquitted of robbery at London's Blackfriars Crown Court.

During seven days of evidence,

jurors were told Chindamo tried to "intimidate and terrify" Mr Sexton, allegedly demanding cash as he withdrew money outside a Sainsbury's store on November 13 last year.

The 20-year-old had been enjoying a work night out which culminated in Camden, north London, at about 3.30am with his friends James Pearce and Seamus Delahunty.

Prosecutor Alison Morgan told the court: "Mr Chindamo came towards Mr Sexton saying words to the effect of, 'Do you know who I am?' and 'Do you remember about the headteacher in Maida Vale?'

The Crown say that this was quite plainly and deliberately a reference to his conviction designed to intimidate and threaten Mr Sexton."

Jurors heard how co-defendant

Gregory Jananto, 32, - armed with a large empty glass bottle which he waved around by the neck - and Saeed Akhtar, 32, surrounded Mr Sexton in an "intimidating and threatening manner" during the dispute.

Chindamo later told police he had been provoked by a man at the cashpoint who branded him a "killer".

Giving evidence from behind a screen, Mr Sexton told the court: "He demanded compensation for disrespecting him."

Defence lawyers claimed Mr Sexton in fact handed over £10 as a peace offering following the dispute so Chindamo could buy a drink.

Chindamo, of Catford, Jananto, of Shepherd's Bush,, and Akhtar, of Camden, consistently denied robbery.

All were cleared of the charges.

Learco Chindamo

The Torry Army: Still alive and kicking LAST WEEK an article appeared in The Courier which suggested that the Torry Army had ceased to exist or was on its last knees.

The Torry Army is in fact still very much alive and kicking.

It has taken a step back and re-examined what it had become and what it should really be and re-invented itself.

It is a group of like-minded people, who are regular supporters of Torrevieja football club, who also meet away from football and enjoy each other’s company at social events arranged by the Torry Army.

Supported It no longer serves as a “cash cow” for the football club but supports and promotes it in any way it can.

It is now led by Pat Stewart, a lady of great integrity ,who is supported by a small committee of willing helpers.

The egos have gone, together with the mobile phones and, you’ve guessed it, the expenditure has been reduced dramatically and so has the cost of becoming a member, which has been reduced by 50 %for this season. to €5.

It is fully behind FC Torrevieja, a football club at which those who run it, those who play for it and those who support it are now united and want it to be successful and something that Torrevieja can be proud of.

Visit the Torry Army website www.fctorrevieja.net for evidence of this.

DARRYLL WRIGHT, Torry Army Comms

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Friday, August 26, 2011

THIS WEEK IN

TERROR AS QUAKE HITS STATES Daily Express

65% call for death penalty

Daily Express PRESSURE for the return of the death penalty has intensified after an opinion poll showed nearly two-thirds of voters want murderers to be executed.

A survey by pollsters Angus Reid, following this month’s rioting across Britain, found 65 per cent of adults quizzed were in favour of capital punishment while only 28 per cent were opposed. And 78 per cent want Parliament to debate the return of capital punishment.

The overwhelming call for the execution of murderers follows support for an e-petition backing the move on a Government website.

More than 17,000 people have signed the petition on direct.gov.uk.

AN EARTHQUAKE rocked the US on Tuesday afternoon, sending tremors through towns and cities across the east coast.

Tens of thousands of workers fled into the streets after buildings that included the White House and Pentagon were evacuated following the 5.9 magnitude quake.

There were reports of numerous injuries, although none were thought to be serious.

Tremors were felt as far south as the Carolinas and north to the Canadian city of Toronto, although New York and Washington were the worst-hit cities.

The highest building in the capital, Washington's National Cathedral was damaged. Traffic lights were knocked out across the city while several schools incurred damage.

Flights at airports including those in New York, Washington and Philadelphia were temporarily grounded as runways were inspected for damage.

Damage The quake hit shortly before 2pm at a depth of 3.7 miles, the US Geological Survey said. It was centred nine miles from the town of Mineral, in Virginia.

Two nuclear reactors at North Anna in Virginia shut down after the plant lost power but there was no major damage.

Debris litters the aisles at a supermarket in Mineral, the quake epicentre British tennis ace Andy Murray tweeted from New York: ‘Earthquake at Flushing Meadows! Weird weird feeling thought I was just dizzy.’’

Also tweeting from New cal career ended last year after her EX-HOME Secretary Jacqui Smith York was Tory MP Louise Daily Mail expenses claims infuriated voters, hired two day-release prisoners to paint her luxury home - when they and clearing streams of rubbish as initially denied knowing about the Mensch, who said: "Er I think my house just shook! I think convicts. should have been cleaning up the part of a charity rehab programme.

But she later admitted they did there might have been an But they were secretly diverted to local community.

They were diverted to her house in the home of Ms Smith and husband work at her £450,000 home last earthquake tremor?"

In New York, people Redditch, Worcs, and she donated Richard Timney and spent two days month.

Bosses at nearby Hewell Prison streamed from shaking cash to a charity overseeing their decorating a room.

The couple paid for the work by only learned what had happened offices, flights were grounded work. Prison chiefs have launched making a donation to the charity from a tip-off. and construction work was an inquiry.

A source said: "This happened halted at the site of the 2001 The pair were supposed to be Batchley Support Group.

Labour's Ms Smith, whose politi- without the prison being informed." World Trade Center attacks. sprucing up scruffy playing fields

Lags painted Jacqui Smith’s home

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Friday, August 26, 2011

THE UK PRESS

CHE’S MOTORBIKE PARTNER DIES AGED 88

Knifed to death - for having an abortion Daily Mail A SCHOOLBOY and two friends who killed a young mother after she aborted his baby have been jailed for a total of more than 30 years.

Nattalie Muir, 21, was stabbed and beaten in a frenzied street attack.

The 15-year-old boy had sworn revenge on Miss Muir, of Whitburn, West Lothian, who had become pregnant by him and then had a termination before going back to a former boyfriend.

The teenager and 34year-old George Stewart appeared at the High Court in Glasgow after admitting to culpable homicide.

Emma Merrilees, 20, who fatally stabbed Miss Muir during the brutal assault, pleaded guilty to murder.

Presiding over the case, Lord Matthews said he was 'sick' of the 'mindless violence' in the attack.

The judge jailed the 15year-old for six years while Stewart received eight years and five months.

Merrilees was given a life sentence and ordered to serve a minimum 16 years.

It was Flee who fled - not Prince Harry PRINCE HARRY was dumped by girlfriend Florence Daily Mirror Brudenell-Bruce because she couldn’t stand his flirting with other girls. of the festival known as the Tractor Shed flirting with anoThe pretty lingerie model, an ex of Formula 1 star Jenson Button, has told friends she ended the relationship because she couldn’t see a future with the prince.

Previously royal sources had claimed Harry dumped HER because he didn’t want to be tied down.

A source close to Florence, 25, nicknamed Flee, said: “She felt he had a wandering eye all the time and she wasn’t really into not knowing who he was flirting with or talking to when they were apart.

“So she ended it. She didn’t want to carry on in a relationship that wasn’t going to go anywhere.

“Call it a summer fling. They both enjoyed themselves but Flee wasn’t interested in taking things further.”

Things came to a head when the couple went to the upmarket Kimberley music festival in Norfolk last month.

The source continued: “At one point Harry was in an area

ther pretty blonde. “Flee saw he was chatting to her and got very jealous and disappointed.”

Then Harry, 26, was spotted ¬surrounded by bikini-clad girls a fortnight ago in Majorca. He had gone to the island after a friend’s wedding while Flee stayed in the UK. Harry and Flee, who are distant cousins, got together after he finally split from on-off girlfriend Chelsy Davy in May. Both girls went to posh Stowe School in Buckinghamshire.

Despite their split, Harry is still friends with Flee and pals say they wouldn’t be surprised if they continue to see each other from time to time.

“Harry did it with Chelsy for years,” the source added.

“He is never nasty when things come to an end. He wasn’t even worried that she stopped the relationship and essentially he was dumped.’’

Prince Harry: Flirt

Ex Flee: Saw no future

AMY WINEHOUSE: IT WASN’T DRUGS TRAGIC Amy Winehouse had NO illegal drugs in her system when she died, the official toxicology report has revealed.

The finding - relayed to dad Mitch follows weeks of speculation over the 27-year-old singer's final hours. And Mitch, 60, wept as he said he was pleased to now be able to "set the record straight".

The findings were presented to Mitch and Amy's mother Janis, 56, by St Pancras coroner's office after weeks of wild speculation surrounding their

The Sun daughter's final hours.

Some alcohol was found in the body of Amy, who had been secretly engaged to film director Reg Traviss.

But the cause of death will not be announced until the inquest verdict is unveiled on October 26.

Mitch told The Sun: "This doesn't make me feel the loss of my daughter any less, but we are pleased to be able to set the record straight to a certain extent. Reg has said that the person

she has been painted as in some quarters was just so far away from the Amy he knew.

"Some of the stories of her last few days were just not how they led their life together."

A Winehouse family spokesman said: "Toxicology results returned to the Winehouse family have confirmed that there were no illegal substances in Amy's system at the time of her death.

"Results indicate that alcohol was present, but it cannot be determined as yet if it played a role in her death.’’

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Friday, August 26, 2011

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Friday, August 26, 2011

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain four years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then.

Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

FIXED: David was having trouble with the Google Toolbar FIXED: Angus was having trouble finding the menu bar in and Firefox 5 Internet Explorer

After getting very fed up with Firefox telling me to update to R5, I decided to do so and use your Google bypass to get the translate feature I really need. The Firefox download appeared to work, but the download address you gave now appears to have been suspended by Twitter. Not sure what the connection is, but I tried it twice to check. OK - we are where we are but if possible, can you advise how I can get a Google Search box, Autofill and Translate onto a toolbar please as I use these features a lot. Many thanks David

Q

Q

A

A Q A

Hi David, the link is still working for me, its http://tinyurl.com/5u2k2d9 however if this is not working for you, you could try going to Firefox’s add-ons page at https://addons.mozilla.org and searching for “compatibility reporter”, it should take you to the same place. The advice remains the same, use the compatibility reporter to enable the Google toolbar to work with Firefox 5. Alternatively of course you could ditch Firefox and install Google Chrome and then install the Google toolbar – wouldn’t be my first choice however as I do like Firefox as a browser.

Update. Hi Richard, thank you yet again for your help. I've no idea why it didn't work when I typed in the link, but when I used the one in your reply, right first time! I've now got the Google toolbar and the function I need, with no apparent problem. I'm going to have a look at Chrome but it will take a lot to change my preference away from Firefox. Again, many thanks. David

Hi Richard, I bought a new laptop a few weeks back. I am in the process of closing down my AOL account and using Hotmail. However, I can't get a toolbar on Internet Explorer (for Edit - Copy/Paste etc). Any ideas?

Hi Angus, the menu bar is hidden in Internet Explorer by default, to show it you need to press the ALT key.

Update. Hi Richard, thanks for the info re menu bar. Just one more thing, I only have the Google search bar visible so when I want to go to a specific website (eg www.hsbc.co.uk) I get thousands of hits when all I really want is the home site. Any ideas? Many thanks, Angus Hi Angus, the thing you are looking for is called the address bar, you can get it to display again by either right hand clicking in the toolbar area and selecting “address bar”.

FIXED: Lee was having problems with his laptop connecting to the Internet

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternately why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Hi Richard, I am getting an error message on my laptop saying there is a conflict with IP addresses and I cannot log on to the Internet. Do you have any ideas?

Q

Hi Lee, yes this is a pretty straight forward one where there are more than one computer in the house connecting to the Internet, sometimes more than one computer will get given the same IP address (the ‘unique’ number that allows you to communicate with the Internet), this results in a conflict and usually the easiest way to resolve the conflict is to restart your computer, so try that first. If it happens often then we may need to look at changing some of the settings on your router.

A

Update: Perfect, that worked a treat thanks!

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Don’t chuck it out!

Some recipes and tips to stop you throwing away the unused (but still perfectly edible) food in your fridge

HERE at The Courier. we were concerned to discover that a third of food bought by consumers ends up in the bin.

There's usually nothing wrong with this produce – it's leftovers from a dish we prepared, or it's just 'on the turn'.

A recent survey of 1,000 people revealed that more

than 40% frequently throw out bread, more than a quarter chuck out bananas, and one in five regularly give unused cucumbers the boot.

Top Tips for preventing food waste: l Store food wisely – most foods can be frozen, including cheese, and fruit and veg can be kept in the fridge. l Containers, containers, containers! If they're airtight

and watertight, they'll keep food fresher for longer. l Use measurers to avoid to cooking too much – especially rice and pasta. l Plan ahead – use up perishables first, such as fresh vegetables. l Have staples in your storecupboard, such as Worcestershire sauce and tinned tomatoes, so you've got essential ingredients to hand.

Here are the Top 7 foods we discard... and some great recipes to remedy this: 1. BREAD Got too much? Freeze it. Or use in puds or sauces.

BREAD AND BUTTER PUDDING A very English dessert, bread and butter pudding is cheap, simple to prepare, and comforting in the extreme.

Ingredients 30g unsalted butter, softened 350g (about 12 slices) of a large, stale white loaf, crusts removed 75g caster sugar 1 large free-range egg and 3 egg yolks 300ml whole milk 300ml double cream 1 vanilla pod, split Generous grating of nutmeg ½ tsp cinnamon 2 tbsp demerara sugar to sprinkle Method 1. Butter a 1.2 litre ovenproof dish. Butter each piece of bread on one side with the remaining butter and slice into halves or quarters. Layer the pieces of bread (buttered-side up) in the dish, overlapping.

2. In a medium bowl, beat the caster sugar with the egg and yolks. Put the whole milk, double cream and vanilla pod in a small saucepan and heat almost to boiling point.

Remove the saucepan from the heat, then slowly pour over the beaten egg mixture, whisking continuously. Strain the resulting mixture through a sieve into a large jug,

scrape the seeds from the vanilla pod and add them to the custard. Grate over nutmeg and stir to combine.

3. Pour the custard mixture evenly over the buttered bread, then top with a mixture of the demerara sugar and cinnamon. Leave to rest for 30 minutes, so the bread soaks up the custard mixture.

4. Meanwhile, preheat the oven to 180°C/fan160°C/gas 4. Bake the bread and butter pudding for 30-40 minutes until the custard has set and the pudding is golden and crunchy on top.

2. BANANAS Too many? Freeze them or use in puds and smoothies. Recipe ideas: banana bread or cake; banana muffins; smoothies.

HEALTHY MOREISH BANANA CAKE

Ingredients

Method

4 tbsp mild olive oil, plus extra for greasing 200g self-raising flour 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda 1 tsp ground mixed spice 75g light muscovado sugar 4 large ripe bananas 2 eggs, beaten 4 tbsp low-fat natural yogurt 2 tsp vanilla extract 2 tbsp runny honey, for drizzling

1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/fan160°C/gas 4. Grease a 1-litre loaf tin and line with baking paper, making sure the paper comes above the tin. In a bowl, mix the flour, bicarbonate of soda, spice and sugar. Set aside.

2. Mash up the bananas in another bowl with a fork. Mix with the oil, eggs, yogurt and vanilla extract. Add to the flour mixture and stir until combined. Pour into the tin and bake for 40-45 minutes, until risen and golden. Set aside to cool in the tin.

3. Remove from the tin, cut into slices and serve with honey to drizzle over.

3. POTATOES Potatoes are versatile and can be used to make many dishes. Or to make compost.

DAUPHINOISE POTATOES This dish was created in the Dauphiné region of France and consists of thinly-sliced potatoes, mixed with milk, cream or creme fraiche, and cheese, garlic and seasoning.

Ingredients 25g butter, plus extra for greasing 1kg even-sized floury potatoes, such as King Edward or Maris Piper 1 onion, thinly sliced 284ml carton double cream 75ml milk Method 1. Preheat the oven to 190°C/fan170°C/gas 5. Grease a large, shallow baking dish with butter. Slice the potatoes as thinly as you can, either using a mandolin, or with a very sharp knife.

2. Layer up evenly in the baking dish, along with the onion slices, seasoning as you go.

Pour over the cream and milk, dot over the butter and cover the dish with foil.

3. Place on a baking sheet and bake for 1 hour.

4. Discard the foil and bake for a further 1520 minutes, or until the potatoes are cooked through and golden.

Friday, August 26, 2011

4. COOKED SLICED MEAT

6. COOKED VEGETABLES

Always store in airtight containers; if they dry up, add to Practise portion control, but any leftovers can be used in hot dishes, which will soften them. Recipe ideas: sliced a stir-fry, frittata or gratin. Alternatively, add to the commeats make great toppings for pizza or baked potatoes; post heap. mix in a risotto, pasta sauce, or cauliflower cheese.

SPUDS WITH SPICY BEANS ‘N SALAMI

BRUNCH-STYLE FRITTATA

5. YOGURT

7. APPLES

Kids will have a lot of fun making this easy dish of A quick, easy frittata recipe that will please a vegetarian spuds, spicy beans and salami - and we guarantee they'll Ingredients medium heat. Add the chesteat the lot 25g butter, plus a little extra nut mushrooms and toma200g chestnut mushrooms, toes. Cook for 3-4 minutes, Ingredients (900W) for 8 minutes. thickly sliced stirring constantly, until just 2 x 175g potatoes, scrubbed 2. Meanwhile, tip the baked 2 ripe tomatoes, cut into softened. Tip into a bowl and 420g can baked beans beans into a bowl. Peel wedges set aside.

100g piece salami or chorizo away and discard the papery 4 eggs 2. In a large bowl, lightly sausage skin from the salami or chori- 75g mature (vegetarian) beat the eggs with 1 table2 tbsp HP Brown Sauce, to zo and cut into chunky Cheddar, coarsely grated spoon water. Stir in the serve slices. Stir into the beans.

Good handful fresh parsley Cheddar, parsley and the 3. Remove the potamushrooms and tomatoes. toes from the Method Season and mix together. microwave with an 1. Preheat the grill to high.

3. Melt the extra butter in oven glove and put on Melt the butter in a medium, the frying pan over a mediserving plates. Heat non-stick frying pan over a um-low heat. Add the egg the beans and mixture, stir briefly, sausages in the then cook for 6-8 microwave on high minutes, or until (900W) for 2 minutes, golden underneath stir, then microwave on and nearly set. high for another 2 min4. Pop under the utes, or until piping hot. hot grill for 3-4 4. Cut a cross in each minutes, until just potato. Using a clean set and turning tea towel to protect golden on top.

Method your hand, gently squeeze it Slide onto a board, 1. Prick the potatoes with a at the base to ease open. cut in half and fork several times and put Spoon in the beans and serve with a onto the microwave sausages and top with HP dressed green turntable. Microwave on high Sauce. salad.

Freeze it. Recipe ideas: add to cake or muffin mixtures Store in a cool, dark place, away from bananas which for a tangy flavour; include in smoothies or curries. spoil other fruit, or store in the fridge. Remove any bad apples, or make apple sauce and freeze it. Recipe ideas: RED BERRY YOGURT SMOOTHIE This red berry yogurt smoothie recipe is just what the doctor soup (yes, soup!); pork Normandy; apple crumble and tarts; apple sauce. ordered on a hot day - and healthy, too.

APPLE SAUCE

Ingredients 500g bag frozen summer fruits 50g golden caster sugar 300ml apple juice 500g raspberry yogurt

Method You can't eat roast pork without apple sauce so we've rustled 1.

Put the up an easy recipe for you, which can be frozen for your confrozen berries venience. into a large Ingredients for about 10-15 minutes, stirprocessor or 500g Bramley apples, ring often, until very soft. blender with the peeled, cored and chopped Remove the lid and simmer sugar, apple 50g caster sugar until all the water has evapojuice and rasp- 25g butter rated. berry yogurt.

2. Remove from the heat Whizz until real- Method and beat in the butter with a ly smooth.

1. Put the chopped apples wooden spoon or an electric 2. Rest a sieve into a saucepan with 150ml hand whisk until really on top of a water and the sugar. Cover smooth. Serve with the roast large jug and and bring to a simmer. Cook pork. pour the s m o o t h i e through. Stir the mixture with a metal spoon to help it through – this takes a while but removes all those raspberry seeds. Chill until needed or put into a Thermos flask to take on a picnic. Don’t forget the plastic cups!

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Friday, August 26, 2011

Don’t cut the carbs DITCHING potatoes, pasta and bread is one of the most common weight-loss strategies, which has become popular due to diet plans such as Atkins and South Beach.

But carbohydrates actually provide fewer calories per gram than fat, protein or alcohol and according to recommendations from the Food Standards Agency on good health, should make up approximately 50 percent of our daily calorie intake.

Carbohydrates are the body’s primary source of energy, and are quickly and easily converted to blood glucose, the body cells’ preferred source of fuel.

In particular, the brain must have glucose as a source of energy. The brain will not use other sources of energy except in the extreme case of starvation, in which ketone bodies (from the breakdown of body fat) are used by the brain. The body cannot store a large amount of carbohydrate; there is only a short supply available as glycogen in the liver and muscle. Therefore, carbohydrates must be supplied on a regular basis.

The problem is not that carbohydrates are bad, it’s just that we tend to eat too much of them. Foods such as pasta, bread, pizza, cakes and cereal bars are quick, easy and readily available as convenience foods, leading us to consume far more than we need. Cutting them out sometimes brings about rapid weight loss, but is not the long-term answer for a healthy, balanced diet.

It's also what you add to the carbohydrates that bump up

the calories. For example, the margarine or butter we put on the bread and the cream or cheese sauces we add to pasta.

The Solution

INSTEAD of cutting out potatoes, rice, pasta and bread altogether, simply go for smaller portions — no bigger than your fist — and spread them out through the day. This will help keep your blood-sugar levels steady and hunger at bay. Aim for more variety as well; for example oats for breakfast, sandwich for lunch and a rice salad for dinner, and balance it out with plenty of protein, fruit, salad and vegetables.

Also, if you need to lose weight, cut down on the added fats (margarine, cream or cheese sauce),

not the carbs.

To beat hunger pangs, lose weight and stay healthy, try these healthy carb tips: l Substitute bran flakes for frosted flakes l Substitute whole wheat bread for regular white bread l Substitute rice cakes for cereal/granola bar l Substitute wholegrain/whole wheat baguette for French bread l Substitute wholewheat pasta for regular pasta l Substitute brown rice for regular white rice l Add wheatgerm and oats to your cereal l Add chopped fruit to your cereal, salads and stews l Serve beans, lentils and extra vegetables with your main meal

UNDERSTANDING AUTO-IMMUNE DISORDERS AUTO-IMMUNE disorders are illnesses that occur when the immune system mistakenly attacks and destroys healthy body tissue. To better understand autoimmune diseases, one must understand how the immune system works.

The immune system is a network of molecules, cells and organs working together to defend the body against foreign invaders (antigens). These antigens include bacteria, virus, fungi, toxins, cancer cells, and blood or tissue from another human or species.

Our first line of defence, the skin and mucous membranes contain white blood cells and antibodies that digest and attack these antigens. When they break through, our body reacts by producing lymphocytes (T and B cells), programmed to attack or kill the antigen. When antibodies or lymphocytes attack the body’s own tissues rather than foreign antigens, an auto-immune disorder is said to occur.

There are over 80 different types of auto-immune disorders affecting different areas of the body – joints, connective tissue, thyroid gland, muscles, red blood cells and skin. Among the commonly known auto-immune disorders are: type 1 diabetes, rheumatoid arthritis, multiple sclerosis, celiac disease, psoriasis, lupus, and many others.

There is no specific cause; however several factors are known to play a role in the disorder. Many of the auto-immune disorders have a familial or genetic basis, meaning a higher risk of developing any autoimmune disorder if it is present in a family member. It

8 GLASSES OF WATER A DAY is just not necessary...and here’s why

DRINKING eight glasses of water a day just means you will spend a lot of time running to the bathroom.

Why do so many people believe this rule?

The number originally came from the National Academy of Sciences of the United States Food and Nutrition Board, which publishes recommended daily allowances of nutrients.

The 1945 edition of the Food and Nutrition Board recommended: “A suitable allowance of water for adults is 2.5 liters (about eight cups) daily in most instances.” This amount is based on the calculation of one millilitre of water for each calorie of food.

However, the Board also noted that most of the water you need is in the food you eat.

All foods contain water. Even the driest nut or seed has a lot of water in it. Furthermore, when food is digested, it is

converted to energy, carbon dioxide and water. You can get most of the fluid your body needs from your food, and you only need to drink enough water to prevent constipation.

When you eat, the pyloric valve at the end of your stomach closes to keep food in the stomach. Then the stomach takes fluid that you drink and food that you eat and mixes them into a soup.

Then the soup passes to the intestines and remains a soup until it reaches your colon. Only then is the fluid absorbed to turn the soup into solid waste in the colon.

If you do not have enough fluid in your body, your body extracts extra fluid from your stool, which makes it hard and can cause constipation. You do not need additional water to “cleanse” or “remove toxins;” Healthy kidneys provide that function without any extra help from you.

A reasonable amount for a healthy human is one cup of water or any other fluid with each meal. If you have a problem with constipation you may not be drinking enough water, but if you are not constipated, you are getting plenty.

You'll also want to replace fluids whenever you sweat a lot, particularly when you exercise in hot weather. Drink water whenever you feel thirsty, but there's no benefit from forcing yourself to drink eight glasses of water a day.

is also known that 80% of sufferers are women, implicating oestrogens as a contributing factor.

Heavy metals such as mercury, lead and nickel, as well as toxic chemicals such as those found in pesticides, solvents, industrial chemicals and even household cleaning products have all been linked to autoimmune disorders. Research has also shown a connection between some auto-immune diseases and vaccination. Other factors include stress and trauma, poor nutrition and smoking.

According to researchers, auto-immune disorders are caused primarily by a combination of genetics and environmental toxins. Hereditary predisposes one to develop an auto-immune disease, and environmental toxins trigger the conditions into being.

So for instance some people genetically predisposed, will not acquire the disease, and not everyone exposed to environmental toxins will develop the condition either. Since several different organs can be affected, the symptoms of the disease are organ specific; however there are common generalised symptoms which include persistent fever, malaise and fatigue.

There is no specific generic test for auto-immune disorders, tests are carried out to rule in or rule out specific diseases. Medical treatment involves the use of corticosteroids, anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDS) and other powerful immunosuppressant drugs such as methotrexate and azathioprine .

The solution to overcoming and preventing autoimmune diseases lies in addressing the root causes and regulating the immune system. Prevention is our best defence. A healthy nutrition and exercise is always a powerful boost to the immune system. l Dr Machi Mannu is a neuro repatterning specialist.

Send your questions to neurorep@gmail.com

Friday, August 26, 2011

27

28

Friday, August 26, 2011

WORST FOR THIRST

YOU probably think you can spot a thirsty car a mile off - but it's not always as easy as you might think.

The vehicles with the shoddiest fuel economy figures aren't always vast, lumbering SUVs or ground-hugging sportsters with thunderous V8 engines. There are cars of all shapes and sizes that perform less than admirably at the pumps, often for completely justifiable reasons.

Here we've assembled a list of cars from across the market that could do better on the fuel efficiency and eco-friendliness front.

Crucially, they're models that few would suspect of harbouring a secret drinking problem so being armed with this info before you go striding into the showroom to buy a new car could prove invaluable.

Proton GEN-2 1.3 GLS Mpg: 40.9 CO2: 164 Hp: 94

the family hatchback class where it tries to grab sales from big hitters like the Ford Focus and Volkswagen Golf. It has a valid excuse for its less than stellar fuel economy figures in that it's four-wheel drive but 37.7mpg combined cycle economy from the 1.5-litre petrol model will still be enough to make many people think twice.

Citroën C3 1.1i 8v Mpg: 47.9 CO2: 137g/km Hp: 61 Not all small cars with small engines are particularly fuel efficient. Citroën's C3 is a

diesel engines to return well above 60mpg.

Choose an entry-level petrol engine, however, and you might well be looking at sub 45mpg economy.

Renault's Mégane 1.6 16v is one of a fair few similar models that have similarly unremarkable green credentials. Its 41.5mpg economy isn't great but, as always, car buyers need to do the sums and work out if a more efficient and expensive engine is worth shelling out for, given the mileage they do.

roomy and comfortable supermini but its entry-level 1.1-litre eight-valve engine struggles to deliver the goods at the pumps.

We'd expect fantastic fuel economy from a car that takes a yawn-worthy 16.5s to reach 62mph but 47.9mpg isn't it.

Proton's model range tends to sell on price more than anything else and its GEN2 supermini is definitely cheap to buy. The problems start when the fuel bills come rolling in. The 1.3-litre engine puts a pokey 94hp at your disposal but the 40.9mpg fuel economy is more what you'd expect from a full-size family car and not a particularly green one that that.

Subaru Impreza 1.5

Mpg: 37.7 CO2: 176 Hp: 106 The Impreza is Subaru's representative in

Ford Mondeo 2.0i Mpg: 35.8 CO2: 184g/km Hp: 143 The pace of change is never slow in the

Renault Mégane 1.6 16v Mpg: 41.5 CO2: 159g/km Hp: 100 It's not uncommon for modern frontwheel-drive family hatchbacks with small

global car industry and it's clear for everyone to see in the current Ford Mondeo range.

The Blue Oval's slickly executed family car won't make too many company car lists with its elderly 2.0i petrol engine returning 35.8mpg and 184g/km emissions.

By contrast, Ford's modern 1.6 Eco Boost turbocharged engine gives the Mondeo 158hp, 44.1mpg and 149g/km emissions.

Not bad.

29

Friday, August 26, 2011

Skoda becomes world’s fastest 2-litre car A modified version of the Skoda Octavia VRS has officially become the world's fastest two-litre production car. Taking part in the famous Speed Week trials at the Bonneville salt flats in Utah, the Octavia recorded times of 225mph and 228mph.

This gave an official time of 227.1mph, giving this extraordinary crown to this otherwise ordinary hatchback - and welcoming its driver, journalist Richard Meeden, into the 200mph club.

The car was produced by starting with a standard Octavia VRS. The interior was entirely stripped out and replaced with a rollcage, with a head support device for the driver in case of accidents.

The engine began life as a standard turbocharged 200hp VRS unit. Under the guidance of specialist tuner Revo Technik, the engine has been tuned up to well over 500hp.

Key changes made include changing the inlet manifold,

swapping in an aluminium unit (better able to handle the extra heat generated over the original plastic item), which also has a set of extra injectors - purely because with such enormous power demands the standard item cannot inject fuel quickly enough.

Another key addition is a new vast shiny single turbocharger, a Precision Engineering GT35 62R, which can deliver 40-45 pounds of boost. However, the record run was set with it running at 35 pounds, leading to the engineers claiming that given perfect conditions - the fastest speed run was set despite a debilitating 15mph cross wind - and full boost, the car could have done 235mph at a push.

The standard VRS gearbox was replaced - somewhat improbably - by a longer-legged example borrowed from an eco special Octavia Greenline. Narrow moon alloy wheels boost the aerodynamics, while the car has no brakes at all; a parachute performs that role.

A brand to beat The record marks 10 years of Skoda selling its performance VRS brand in the UK, and also surely marks the final burial of Skoda jokes. Out here in the US our UK-plated Skodas are attracting admiring glances, together with interest as to when they will be sold in the States; Skoda in the US at least starts with an entirely clean sheet from a branding perspective.

There are no plans to bring the Czech brand to America, but as the US market increasingly accepts the type of smaller, sensible family cars that Skoda specialises in, it must surely remain a possibility.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

All heart and Soulman…

SOME of you will have heard of or even been to see the fantastic artist known as J.J Soulman. But for those of you who haven’t, then this guy is really worth a night out.

Originally from Nottingham, JJ has been performing here on the Costa Blanca for 10 years now.

He first showed an interest in music as a young child and started guitar lessons at the age of 10. As a teenager he developed his guitar and song writing skills and went on to teach himself the drums, bass and keyboards.

Then at college he started his first band. He was the front man and guitarist and it was a large band with both male and female musi-

cians which played a similar music style to his idols, Sly and the Family Stone and Prince.

Their first gigs took them on the local collage circuit of pubs and clubs around Nottingham, which was a vibrant, lively city. And it wasn’t long before word spread about this Funky, Pop, Rock and Soul group with their unusual style and sound. The band went from strength to strength playing to packed houses and appearing in the local press and on BBC radio.

They also got themselves a manager, but what JJ really wanted to do was to secure a recording deal which in the early 90’s was a difficult thing to do.

So he recorded demos which paid off with the group securing more prestigious gigs in larger venues and outdoor summer festivals.

Having still not got that elusive record deal, in 1994 J.J set out to write and record a new demo with a view to releasing and funding the C.D independently. With the help of a Londonbase management company, he released his first independent C.D which led to him getting Midlands based commercial radio airplay. He also appeared on local T.V and his album was sold at Virgin, HMV and other great record stores - but it never got to be a top 10 seller.

Undeterred, J.J kept writing and performing and also joined another band called ‘The Revelations’ as lead vocalist. This was a little different to what he had been doing as the band was in the Commitments vein.

They toured the country, appearing with big names including Captain Sensible, Mark Morrison, Boney M and Bill Maynard.

Now married with three children, JJ headed for the Costa Blanca, where he decided for

the first time in his career to perform as a solo artist. And J.J Soulman was born, Ten years on, he’s still thrilling audiences with his Soul and Motown show which has a lot to do with his musical influences like James Brown, Jimi Hendrix, Elvis, Prince, Sam Cooke and Wilson Pickett.

He has not totally left his band background and was, until the summer season, a part of the Commitments tribute group ‘Saviours of Soul’ But this hard working guy is still constantly gigging – and also a member of the new male soul vocal harmony trio ‘The Mighty Motowns’. Their style is similar to The Drifters, Detroit Spinners and the Temptations and they will be performing live out here from the autumn. So make sure you go and see J.J Soulman doing what he does best......singing with great soul.

If you’re a bar or an entertainer and want to appear in the gig guide or you have any events coming up, please contact me by email on mandy@starsinbars.org or call me on 685302529 or just visit my website www.starsinbars.org

Mandy

DATE

VENUE

ACT/ EVENT

OTHER INFO

FRIDAY 26th

Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Horacios in Las Mimosas Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Arches in Los Alcazares Cheers Bar in Eagles Nest Las Naciones in Quesada

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Lynden B Samantha Curtis Mally Red Strokes Nikki G Greg March

Starting at 10pm Comedy Elvis Show

SATURDAY 27th

Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Lodosol in San Pedro Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Rays Bar in Campoverde Treetops in Campoverde Las Naciones in Quesada

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Lynden B Kids Disco/ Magician / DJ Jay Shani Jimmy Mac Steve Finn Tim Ross Andy Jones

Starting at 10pm Comedy Show Starting at 8pm

SUNDAY 28th

Snug in Torre de la Horedada Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Casa Ventura in San Luis Cheers Bar in Eagles Nest Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Lo Marabu in Dona Pepa

Samantha Curtis Cabaroke with Matt Christian Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Mark Bailey DJ Jay Karaoke Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke

MONDAY 29th

Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Chicken Shack in San Luis Arches in Los Alcazares

D.J Jay B.J Bluesman Debbie Slater

TUESDAY 30th

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Cheers Bar in Eagles Nest

Kens Quiz Quiz night with Darren James Karaoke with Ruby Blues Karaoke with D.J Jay Nikki G

Starting at 9pm

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Montes Bar in Los Montesinos Restaurant La Boca in Playa Los Locos Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Bar Sioux in Gran Alacant

Crazy Bingo with Spike Fun Music Quiz B.J Bluesman Maria O’Hara Magician & D.J Jay Shirelle

Starting at 4pm Starting at 9pm

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Sisoma Romana in Dona Pepa The Priory in El Galan Bobby’s Bar in Quesada Arches in Los Alcazares

Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Tony Lincoln Lenny Mitchell Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke Lorna Michelle

WEDNESDAY 31st

THURSDAY 1st

Elvis & Rock n Roll

Starting at 5pm Michael Buble tribute Starting at 6pm

Starting at 8.30pm

Starting at 10pm

Starting at 9.30pm

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Friday, August 26, 2011

HOT GOSSIP

Florence and the Machine Tune in to TKO fm every single day with our TOP, (great looking,) DJ’s bringing you the best music, fun and games, each and every day with classic songs and new stuff, we’ve got it all for you. Look out very soon as it will be

time for you to ‘Beat the Intro’ to a few songs for your chance to win yourself a mobile phone courtesy of Lumsden Auctions!

On this weeks HOT GOSSIP we just can’t help beating all the other stations

once again to bring you something amazing from Florence and the Machine. We would love to keep the secret till we could make it a TKOfm weekly power play but this week, something happened in the world of pop, it was so incredible, the website couldn’t cope with the number of people just trying to view the new video from Florence called ‘What the water gave me’ from her website.

What The Water Gave Me', is a blossoming theatrical song that hits that loved 'Florence and The Machine' sound right on the head. When Paul Epworth recently said that Florence's sophomore effort had no weak tracks it seems that man may have been right.

That Epworth 'big hit' sound pushes Welch's vocals, as she echoes out: ''Time it took us. To where the water was. That's what the water gave me. And time goes quicker. Between the two of us. Oh, my love, don't forsake me. Take what the water gave me.''

Building steadily throughout the second half of the track is truly where it kicks in to epic proportion. Those who may have doubted whether Welch could pull it off a second time round will certainly by no means be in love.

IT'S AN AFTERNOON TEA MYSTERY! It's fast becoming the biggest mystery since 'Who Shot Phil Mitchell?'.

The question being posed during AFTERNOON TEA on TKO GOLD, is teasing, annoying and frustrating the entire Costa Blanca and beyond.

Just who is the Mystery Voice? The show's presenter, Darren James can't believe it's gone on so long. "I launched this latest voice on 18th July and thought it might catch a few listeners out; but never thought it would have lasted for 18 shows and 6 weeks! There haven't been any clues but all I've said is that almost everyone will know the name and would equally recognise his photograph. I've also said that it doesn't belong to a member of the Royal Family!"

There have been almost 250 incorrect names suggested - far too many to list here - with the commonly suggested ones being JAMES BOLAM, ALF RAMSEY, JOHN MILLS, DAVID JACOBS, MICHAEL MIDDLETON,

?

DOUGLAS BADER, BOBBY ROBSON, BRIAN JOHNSTON, DAVID STEEL, JACK HAWKINS, LORD OAKSEY, JOHN LE MESURIER among many, many others!

"My colleague and Courier columnist Alex Trelinski once had a mystery

voice that ran for 3 months during one of his BBC shows.", said Darren, "It would be an achievement to beat that, although whether my loyal listeners will be able to stand the strain I don't know!"

We know that listeners up and down the Costa Blanca and worldwide are tuning in and trying, without success, to identify the voice. Why not join them and get your friends, neighbours and families to help you!

Tune in to TKO GOLD 96.7FM & 87.5FM and also online at www.tkogold.com or via your iPhone Radio App and listen out for AFTERNOON TEA with DARREN JAMES between 2pm and 6pm and the Mystery Voice on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays!

If you don't know the voice, there's always the Mystery Singer and Mystery TV Programmes to have a go at on Wednesdays and Fridays!

If this is what's to come from one of the most anticipated album's of the year, by god it will be worth the wait and will undoubtedly continue Florence and The Machine's success.

Another TKO find and well worth the wait!

WIN A MEAL FOR TWO AND WINE AT QUESADA FISH & CHIPS POP QUIZ August 26 Welcome to the famous TKO Gold pop quiz! We sure did have some fun with last week’s questions. Let´s see if you can win yourself a meal for two at Quesada fish and chips.

All you have to do is take the first letter from each answer to find the name of a band or artist. Once you have found the key word listen in to Chris Ashley´s show on TKO Gold, Saturday mornings 9am – 12pm 1. No more Cloudy Days & Desperado are just 2 of this groups songs you will hear on TKO Gold.

2. The Belmonts (Teenager In Love) lead singer.

3. What type of dawn did Helen Reddy sing about.

4 The late Michael Hutchence sang with this band 5 Hot Chocolate sang about this young lady in 1974.

6 Who originally sang Blue Suede Shoes.

7 This New Zealand group had their only UK hit with How Bizarre.

8 Lionel Richie was the lead singer with this group.

9 Name the hotel at the end of Lonely Street.

10 He sang about the Ghostbusters.

11 The Steve Miller band recorded a magical tune in 1982.

12 First hit for The Move

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Friday, August 26, 2011

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 13 represents L and 21 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Agitated (7) 5 Cults (5) 8 Commencement (5) 9 Sailor (7) 10 Red fruit (9) 12 Unwell (3) 13 Ill-gotten (6) 14 Pester (6) 17 Metal container (3) 18 Tomb (9) 20 Outer appearance (7) 21 Secret store (5) 23 Shouts (5) 24 Coffee bar employee (7)

Down 1 Monk (5) 2 Applicable (3) 3 Bother (7) 4 Photographic equipment (6) 5 Gruff (5) 6 Applicant (9) 7 Excess (7) 11 Rogue (9) 13 Gratify (7) 15 Additional (7) 16 Excellent (6) 18 Repasts (5) 19 Journalists collectively (5) 22 Donkey (3)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Praises, 5 Hurts, 8 Regular, 9 Races, 10 Stern, 11 Observe, 12 Copies, 14 Ceased, 17 Prayers, 19 Patch, 22 Blame, 23 Elegant, 24 Entry, 25 Possess.

Down: 1 Parts, 2 Argue, 3 Silence, 4 Sorrow, 5 Harms, 6 Records, 7 Suspend, 12 Capable, 13 Peasant, 15 Express, 16 Asleep, 18 Enemy, 20 Tease, 21 Hates.

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Spreads out nurses after operation (5) 4 Troop leader in marine mammals’ lifts (6) 9 The weather’s fine so put the amusements in place (3,4) 10 A trap created like this is isolated (5) 11 Anna taught here in Asia Minor (4) 12 Gee, neat, sort of, to be adolescent (7) 13 Sign a piece of sports equipment (3) 14 Get by in a comic opera (4) 16 Amphibian in tomato advertising campaign (4) 18 Sally without the gangster is cunning (3) 20 Peter is about to have time off (7) 21 Despatched to the audience to get money (4) 24 Near a clapped out stadium (5) 25 It’s normal to profess maturity (7) 26 Not as hard as Eire, correct (6) 27 Take care of delicacy (5) STANDARD CLUES

Across 1 Unlocks (5) 4 Robs (6) 9 Settled and secure (3,4) 10 Separately (5) 11 Former name of Thailand (4) 12 Adolescent (7) 13 Prompt (3) 14 Get through (4) 16 Tailless amphibian (4) 18 Cunning (3) 20 Intermission (7) 21 US coin (4) 24 Stadium (5) 25 Standard (7) 26 Not as difficult (6) 27 Indulgence (5)

Down 1 Think too much about bosses (6) 2 More a face in the crowd (5) 3 Employee’s wage packet contains stolen goods (4) 5 Make fun of a waistcoat during evaluation (8) 6 A small laboratory takes on a graduate in America (7) 7 Fabric seen at building (6) 8 Make a speech with nothing but speed (5) 13 Bet Alice is uneasy among the chaste (8) 15 Yes, sort out bed occupants (7) 17 Elbow product is part of meagre, as expected, supply (6) 18 Danes make this type of car (5) 19 Affirm at examination (6) 22 Dave Earl is not put off (5) 23 A tendency to be crooked (4)

Down 1 Preoccupy (6) 2 Additional (5) 3 Loot (4) 5 Mockery (8) 6 US state (7) 7 Cotton fabric (6) 8 Speak (5) 13 Chaste (8) 15 Marine molluscs (7) 17 Lubrication (6) 18 Type of car (5) 19 Bear witness (6) 22 Dodge (5) 23 Corrupt (4)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Cadavers, 7/19 Scrap metal, 8 Dunstable, 9 Den, 10 Soap, 11 Pirate, 13 Spears, 14 Concur, 17 Therms, 18 Trim, 20 Err, 22 Terrorist, 23 Altos, 24 Clerical.

Down: 1 Codes, 2 Dentate, 3 Veto, 4 Rabbit, 5 Prude, 6 Spenser, 7 Senator, 13 Several, 15/12 Cardiac arrests, 16 Amoral, 17 Trite, 21 Door.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words

Son

Axial

Typal

Age

Sou

Beeps

Wrote

Ant

Sty

Beryl

6 letter words

Are

Tip

Cares

Aerial

Ebb

Tut

Caret

Ceding

Err

4 letter words

Diary

Enlist

Fab

East

Elate

Lawyer

Lee

Else

Exert

Newish

Mat

Opal

Maori

Traced

Nag

Went

Ready

7 letter words

Oft

5 letter words

Stain

Abalone

Par

Agnes

Teeth

Realise

Ram

Aorta

Tempt

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 7 Cheap (goods, labour, shop, ticket) (6) 8 Flour (6) 9 Duck (bird) (4) 10 Actresses (8) 11 Perejil (7) 13 These (5) 15 Goat (5) 17 Fósforos (7) 20 Medianoche (8) 21 Último (final) (4) 23 Por favor (6) 24 To scratch (6)

Down 1 Cup (for tea, etc) (4) 2 Alcades (6) 3 Walnut trees (7) 4 Blanco (color) (5) 5 Trenes (Ferro) (6) 6 Sobre (para cartas) (8) 12 Yellow (ribbon, paint, colour) (8) 14 Fábrica (7) 16 Pista de aterrizaje (6) 18 Jealous (husband, wife, lover) (6) 19 Acordar (precio, fecha) (5) 22 Cisne (4)

33

Friday, August 26, 2011 Across 1 Which dance craze was popularised by singer Chubby Checker in the 1960s? (3,5) 7 What name is given to physical strength in contrast to intelligence? (5) 8 Which singer/actress starred as Coco Hernandez in the 1982 film Fame? She also topped the charts with the theme song. (5,4) 9 Which group’s UK hit singles include Poison Arrow, The Look Of Love and All Of My Heart? (3) 10 Which is the longest river in Spain? (4) 11 Which 1959 Charlton Heston film won 11 Academy Awards? (3,3) 13/16 Which Hungarianborn American nuclear physicist was known as the ‘father of the H-bomb’? (6,6) 14 Nigel who was Chancellor of the Exchequer from June 1983 to October 1989? (6) 17 Oswald who founded the British Union of Fascists in 1932? (6) 18 What name is usually given to a large enclosed shopping area from which traffic is excluded? (4) 20 Morten Harket was the lead singer of which chart topping Norwegian group? (1-2) 22 Where in Virginia is the American National Cemetery located? (9) 23 Which constellation, said to represent a hunter holding a club and shield, contains many bright stars, including

Quiz Word

Rigel and Betelgeuse? (5) 24 What is the capital of Belgium? (8) Down 1 What is the name given to the lining of the stomach of a

SUDOKU

cow or other ruminant used as food? (5) 2 ‘Superciliary’ means of or relating to which part of the face? (7) 3 What is the name of the watery part of milk that remains after the formation of curds? (4) 4 Sissy who starred as country singer Loretta Lynn in the 1980 film Coal Miner’s Daughter? (6) 5 Which system for detecting the presence of aircraft, ships, etc, sends out pulses of high-frequency electromagnetic waves that are reflected off the object back to the source? (5) 6 Which imaginary creature is represented as a white horse with a long horn growing from its forehead?

(7) 7 Which city is the capital of Iraq? (7) 12 According to Celtic legend, who was the lover of Isolde? (7) 13 What is the name of the imaginary line around the Earth dividing it into northern and southern hemispheres? (7) 15 Which city, the largest in the Pacific Northwest region of the US, is nicknamed the ‘Emerald City’? (7) 16 See 13 Across 17 Which US crime syndicate is also referred to as the Cosa Nostra? (5) 19 What name is given to a golf course, especially one on grass-covered sandy ground near the sea? (5) 21 Which Australian group topped the US charts with Need You Tonight? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH Verbos 5 - Verbs 5 Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

science QUIZ 1. What Figure Has Four Sides All The Same Length But No Right Angles?

2. Emphysema Affects Which Part Of The Body?

3. Which bird turns it's head upside down to eat?

4. What plant has flowers but no leaves?

5. There are over 130,000 species of what on earth?

6. Which Lays Blue Egg's , The Song Thrush Or The Mistle Thrush?

7. Which Small Breed Of Cattle Is Found Wile In The Tibetan Plateu , North Of The Himalayas?

8. What Are The Pads Of Cartilage Between Spinal Vertabrae Commonly Called?

9. What did mathematician John Napier invent in 1614?

10. Where Would You Find Your Uvula?

11. What Is Trinitoluene Better Known As? 12. Where would you find the Metatarsals?

13. what is a death cap?

14. To The Nearest Half Pint, How Much Gastric Juice Do You Have?

15. What animal has a prehensile penis?

1. A Rhombus 2. Lungs 3. Flamingo 4. Cactus 5.

Butterflies 6. Song Thrush 7. Yak 8. Discs 9. Logarithms 10. The Back Of Your Mouth 11. TNT 12. The Feet 13. toadstool 14. 2.5 Pints 15. Dolphin

ANSWERS

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across:1 Poaching, 7 Moose, 8 Androcles, 9 Leo, 10 Luke, 11 Poor Me, 13 Nymphs, 14 McCoys, 17 Lolita, 20 Lei, 22 Analgesia, 23 Chess, 24 Bergamot.

Down: 1 Pearl, 2 Andy Kim, 3 Hoof, 4 Nelson, 5 Doyle, 6 Seconds, 7 Ms Grace, 12/18 Phileas Fogg, 13 Niblick, 15 Opossum, 16 Strafe, 17 Liver, 19 Grant, 21 Agog.

RS T A UR CDA I A P F RE I I R RUT E MT V T P GDF A B T S MK L X L UE D S A B

T MC C S RT A RD I A F Y A T S E QZ UQURL R E R MR A A P A A RE GP E I A S RA RL DNP J I I DH T V J Z R I P MP A CI F OJ ORE A R

Soduko

C A F I A J L R R N C A D R E

19. viajar, 20. vivir, 21. volar, 22. votar a. to taste, b. to vote, c. to use, d. to guess, e. to bring, f. to travel, g. to live, h. to swallow, i. to empty, j. to fly, k. to add, l. to smell, m. to dress, n. to fear,

QV RL RW RE GE K E NNE HV V K I UOE A CRL S QR OA T DE Y R I V MV B R ME L V B S T E J E R I A A J I N CV E GRG J A I V A A K ODV T P OOOQOI DOP RV F Span - Eng

o. to climb, p. to knit, q. to be able to, r. to liquidise, s. to check, t. to sweat, u. to take time, v. to come Answers: 1d, 2l, 3q, 4a, 5t, 6k, 7u, 8p, 9n, 10e, 11h, 12o, 13r, 14c, 15i, 16v, 17s, 18m, 19f, 20g, 21j, 22b.

1. adivinar, 2. oler, 3. poder, 4. saborear, 5. sudar, 6. sumar, 7. tardar, 8. tejer, 9. temer, 10. traer, 11. tragar, 12. trepar, 13. triturar, 14. utilizar, 15. vaciar, 16. venir, 17. verificar, 18. vestir,

ADIVINAR

TREPAR

OLER

TRITURAR

PODER

UTILIZAR

SABOREAR

VACIAR

SUDAR

VENIR

SUMAR

VERIFICAR

TARDAR

VESTIR

TEJER

VIAJAR

TEMER

VIVIR

TRAER

VOLAR

TRAGAR

VOTAR

Quizword

Fill It In

34

Friday, August 26, 2011

Horoscopes

By Pandora Aries March 21 - April 19 Luckily, today is the best day you're going to have over the coming months - so let loose.

Incidentally, it may be in your "letting loose" that you cause the accident that sees you spend the coming months in traction. There a lots of sweet delights in the air today, especially if a trip to the sweet shop is in the offing.

Stepping out tentatively Dear Rose, I have been divorced for four years and am very happy here enjoying my retirement.

I have some good girl friends and enjoy an active and social life.

Recently I have started to learn ballroom dancing and have met a very nice man.

He is a widower and has asked me to accompany him to a golf-club dinner and dance.

I do want to go but feel very nervous, as this will be the first date I have had since my divorce. My ex-husband was my only lover so this will be very strange. What shall I do?

CAROL, via email

l

Well Carol, I can understand your predicament. It will feel very peculiar at first to be going out with a new man.

My advice to you is just take this all very slowly at first.

Consider him just as a friend and see what happens. Enjoy your evening at the dance and when it ends tell him you will see him next time at your class.

You will be able to tell by then if you would like to see him again, and if he also feels the same I am sure he will make another arrangement.

I do hope all goes well and please tell me if things get more serious.

Enjoy yourself.

Mum’s tattoo tough on me Dear Rose, My mother is so domineering. I am 17 years old and my mother dictates everything I do. My father never interferes and just agrees with her for a quiet life.

I wanted to have a tattoo

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Exercise may seem like a dirty word, but until you lose some weight fatty, it's the dirtiest word you're going to hear for a long time. The rate of absorption into your skin will increase three fold today as Mars combined with Jupiter to create... well, whatever is created to allow for that. I suppose.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 Ensure your blood stays within your system today by not venturing further than your refridgerator. Everything you have to fear comes from within. You should have chosen the korma instead of the vindaloo.

Cancer June 21 - July 22

If you have a problem Romany Rose can help you with, email her at office@thecourier.es of a rose on my shoulder, but she has strictly forbidden it until I am 18.

SHELLEY, San Miguel

l

Well Shelley, I know this is hard for you at the moment.

I remember when I was your age, and I had a very strict father who set similar rules on me. In the end I rebelled and left home!

Now, when I look back, I realise he was only doing it because he cared about me and was worried.

We did live in London at the time which I must agree is different from Spain.

Try and talk to your mum and explain how you feel.

Your mother was also young once (she can't be that old now!)

Bring your friends to the house more so she can get to know them, and always carry a mobile with you.

One more year to wait for the tattoo will very quickly pass and perhaps persuade your mum to give it to you for an 18th birthday present.

Try to think how lucky you are to have parents who really love and care for you.

My husband is too much!

Dear Rose, I retired a year and a half ago and moved to Spain. My husband worked abroad all of our married life and only gave up six months ago.

I have made new friends and as I am used to being on my own I am finding being with my husband 24/7 very difficult to cope with.

He does not have any hobbies and although he tries to keep himself occupied, I feel I should stay with him.

However, I am finding this very claustrophobic.

I know from speaking to other women that I am not alone with this problem.

Please advise me what to do.

more relaxing pace of life.

I hope all goes well for you.

Dominant Mum in law Dear Rose, I am quite worried about my boyfriend’s relationship with his mother.

He is a single father living with his 11-year-old son, James, just four doors away from his parents - but his mother does a lot for him, for example child care and cleaning etc.

She is a very dominant sort of person and I am quite frightened of her.

Although Andrew is 41, she still treats him like a child. He seems to adore her and tells her everything about us even our sex life, which I am not happy about.

How can I tell him how I feel about this without him taking offence?

MARILYN, Los Alcazarez

l

So Marilyn, at last you are having to adjust to proper married life!

I think you’ve had a good life for too long. No seriously, this is a very common problem.

The only advice I can give you is to discuss it with your other half and explain how you feel. I am sure he must also feel the same.

It will be very difficult for him to adjust to this new life of not only being in the cut and thrust of a busy working life, but also being alone with you!

Try and start a new hobby together, e.g. dancing, or join a club where you will both meet new friends.

Perhaps the University of the Third Age would be a good idea.

Don't stop seeing your girl friends, but try to be more tolerant and slowly you my even learn to enjoy your husband’s company again now that you have a

JULIA, Gran Alacant

l

This is very difficult for you, Julia, as you want your boyfriend to be more of a man.

Andrew obviously still relies a lot on his mother for support with James.

Could you help a little more perhaps?

If this happens, maybe you will get a little closer.

How serious is your relationship?

Could you move in together so that he will not need his mother so much?

As for talking to his mother so freely, I expect he has got used to that as she has always been there to support.

Just continue to show him how much you love them both and I am sure that when he completely trusts you he will not feel the need he has now about his mother.

The older you get the more you're starting to realise that everyone else is an idiot.

Creeping around on your tip-toes is all very well and good, but driving like that is just going to give you sore feet.

Leo July 23 - August 22 Express yourself, do a backflip, try to do the splits. Dance and the world will be yours. You are a beautiful creature - don't let any other pretty bitch tell you otherwise.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Make yourself a coffee, sit down and read the internet. Hell, it's what you do everyday, right? Peaches and cream - if only more things were like these two beautiful, oft-paired, delights.

Libra September 23 - October 22 Reading through a dictionary is the least effective way to learn more about the world.

Get out there! Compact Discs are very shiny, but using them to attract seagulls in order to bludgeon them to death with your shoe is neither good manners nor entirely legal.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 The law may be your friend today, or it might turn round and bite you in the bum. Either way the word "law" is going to crop up. Your choice of reading material is starting to swerve dangerously into the "blue" section.

Wake up in a trash-can again? Don't let your drinking get you down, go and have a beer.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Combovers will suddenly attract you this week as you attempt to get a hospital appointment for an eye problem. If you want to ride your bicycle, then by all means do it.

But I refuse to be held responsible for any consequences.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Fun is a word that will score you few points in scrabble...but then when was life all about scrabble? In biscuits one can find sweet, sweet redemption.

Especially when soaked in Rum.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Although danger is never far away, you may have an exhilirating time in the coming days. This horoscope may destruct in 10 seconds. Cat hair is an excellent source of breathing problems!

Pisces February 19 - March 20 There might not be a tomorrow, but all indications point to yes You may think later this month that your computer has been hacked by some 12 year old American girl. However, you will soon come to realise that actually a family pet has chewed through the cord of your mouse.

Friday, August 26, 2011

35

TRELI ON THE TELLY THE X-CEPTIONAL FACTOR It’s still so cool without Cowell

THERE were nearly 11 million reasons why ITV1 were cock-a-hoop with the return of The X Factor last Saturday. After a dreadful summer, with weekend viewers deserting the channel en masse, it was one hell of a My only regular criticism is that ratings spike to welcome a new series and a new judging Alex Crawford: we don’t get to see enough of the panel.

Risky business decent auditions, with a lot of I’m delighted to say that the show was bang on form with emphasis going on the circus and the usual mixture of talent and madness, and I have to conjoke acts. I loved the lady from fess that I watched it twice. Yes, I am a fan!

Hong Kong, though - I’m sure she All eyes were on the new judging panel, and they delivered would have made it all to the way to big time. As a unit, they just seemed to get on really well and the final had she auditioned for brought a real feeling of freshness and fun.

Britain’s Got Talent!

Gary Barlow is clearly developing into the serious Simon Did I miss Cowell? Yes, but the Cowell-like figure with the addition of some cracking one-linmulti-millionaire can rest easy that ers for the rubbish acts. his baby is in very safe hands. By Kelly Rowland and Tulisa are full of enthusiasm, whilst the way, who was Cheryl Cole? It does show that the TV Louis Walsh seems to have been rejuvenated since I didn’t business moves on very quickly indeed. hear him utter one cliché!

Whilst ITV1 was getting its Saturday night business together, BBC1 gave us a new early-evening disaster called Epic Win’ It’s worth watching just to see how bad it is and how an excellent frontman like Alexander Armstrong is forced to go their deadly rival. into the gutter with a rubbish format that even ITV wouldn’t I know they must have been spitting blood at Television touch on a bad day.

Centre, since they were totally outclassed over the weekend.

I made copious Journalism can be a very dangerous profession in war use of my fast-forzones, with many losing their lives over the years trying to get ward button, and I the story home. But I sense that the BBC’s tough Health and couldn’t really care Safety guidelines may have inhibited the corporation’s excelmuch about any of it. lent team from doing the job they instinctively wanted to do.

I just hope that Tripoli was one city that was not liberated by the BBC’s Armstrong’s career John Simpson! doesn’t suffer too Get your recording machines ready! Starting five nights a much, as he is one of week from this Sunday on BBC4, they’ll be repeating the best guest preForbrydelsen, the Danish series that was re-made for US senters on Have I viewers as The Killing, and which is currently going down the Got News for You ratings toilet for Channel 4. and is doing a good Everybody who has seen it says it is terrific, so forget the job anchoring Pointless on BBC1. In fact, that title sums up sub-titles, and just go for it. A second series is coming later Epic Win perfectly. this year.

It’s been a dramatic time for the British TV news channels, I got it wrong! Badly wrong! Channel 5 has had record ratwith the recent riots, and then the massive events in Libya. It ings for its revival of Celebrity Big Brother, which is massive was utterly compelling watching Sky News last weekend as egg on the face time for Channel 4, who dumped it last correspondents Alex Crawford and Ian Woods travelled with year…..because the ratings were falling! the rebels and broadcast live on the road.

Crawford, along with her crew, transmitted live at great personal risk as they made the journey into Tripoli and it was gripping journalism as the pictures told the story.

Crawford handled it brilliantly, the new mobile satellite technology producing some of the best exclusive footage Sky News has ever had, which was then carried by channels all round the world.

The other providers like the BBC News Channel had little or nothing to show, with unsure presenters talking to studio pundits, as the story unfolded in all its glory on The Celebrity Big Brother line-up: Egg-on-the-face time for Channel 4

with ALEX TRELINSKI

36

Friday

26th August

00:35 02:50 03:45 04:45 05:15 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:30 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:05 16:35 17:00 17:30 18:00 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

A Beautiful Mind Countryfile Travellers Saints and Scroungers Newsday HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Heir Hunters Homes Under the Hammer Wreck or Ready?

Cash in the Attic Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Escape to the Country BBC News; Weather Sorry, I've Got No Head Bear Behaving Badly Dick & Dom Go Wild Fee Fi Fo Yum Newsround Pointless BBC News Regional News Programmes The One Show Fake Britain EastEnders A Question of Sport My Family Miranda BBC News Regional News and Weather John Bishop's Britain

00:30 The Hour 01:30 The Culture Show at the Edinburgh Festival 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday

05:15 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor 07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Roar 08:30 The Jungle Book 08:40 Deadly Art 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Dani's House 09:25 LazyTown 09:50 Bob the Builder 10:00 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Kerwhizz 11:05 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Coast 12:40 The White Tower 14:15 Diagnosis Murder 15:00 Wanted Down Under Revisited 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! Ten of the Best 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Eggheads Celebrity Special 20:00 South Africa Walks 20:30 The Bear Family and Me 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 India on Four Wheels 23:00 The Rob Brydon Show 23:30 Newsnight

00:50 Grimefighters 01:20 The Zone 03:20 University or Bust: Tonight 03:50 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Fraud Squad 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather

COME DINE WITH ME: COSTA DEL SOL The culinary competition ventures abroad to the Spanish region of Costa del Sol, where four expats compete for the ÂŁ1,000 prize. Entrepreneur Mekala Hodgson, bilingual Greg Van Praagh, retiree John Morton and fun-loving Mandy Strutton host dinner parties featuring an Essex-inspired menu and Thai food.

00:05 Seven Dwarves 01:05 Channel 4 Presents - Will Bayley 2012 01:10 The Album Chart Show 01:30 Hollyoaks Music Show 02:00 Abbey Road Debuts 02:10 Sounds from the Cities 02:40 The Sex Education Show 03:35 Mesh: Tourist Trap 03:40 Brothers & Sisters 04:25 Wogan's Perfect Recall 04:50 Countdown 05:35 Cookery School 06:30 Yo Gabba Gabba!

06:55 The Hoobs 07:20 Freshly Squeezed 07:45 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:10 According to Jim 09:00 Frasier 10:00 90210 10:55 N-Dubz: Live at the O2 11:55 The Big Bang Theory 12:30 Friends 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 A Place in the Sun 14:05 Channel 4 Presents - Joe Bestwick 2012 14:10 River Cottage Bites 14:15 Damn the Defiant!

16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 4thought.tv 20:35 The Merits of Ferrets 21:00 Come Dine with Me 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 22:35 Chris Moyles' Quiz Night 23:25 Sean Lock: Lockipedia Live

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Cowboy Builders 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Fireman Sam 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 The WotWots 08:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:20 Milkshake!

08:25 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:25 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Olivia 10:00 Little Princess 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 My Son Is Innocent 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 How Do They Do It? 21:00 The Gadget Show 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother: Live Eviction 23:00 The Bachelor 23:35 UEFA Super Cup Highlights

37

Saturday 27th August

00:05 My Favourite Joke 00:35 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:45 Cursed 02:20 Restoration Home 03:20 Travellers 04:20 Wonderstuff 04:50 Newswatch 05:00 BBC News 05:30 British Olympic Dreams 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Our World 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Football Focus 13:00 BBC News; Regional News 13:10 Formula 1: The Belgian Grand Prix - Qualifying 15:15 Live Challenge Cup Rugby League 18:05 BBC News; Regional News 18:25 Epic Win 19:10 All New Total Wipeout 20:10 Doctor Who 21:00 The National Lottery: Secret Fortune 21:50 Casualty 22:40 John Bishop's Britain 23:10 BBC News; Weather 23:30 Match of the Day

00:00 The Review Show at the Edinburgh Festival 01:00 Bad Education 02:40 Nirvana 04:10 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor

07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:45 Octonauts 08:00 Deadly 60 08:30 Arthur 08:55 Hounded 09:25 Prank Patrol 09:55 Trade Your Way to the USA 10:20 Fee Fi Fo Yum 10:50 Mission: 2110 10:50 Shaun the Sheep 11:25 League of Super Evil 11:40 Wolverine and the X-Men 12:00 OOglies 12:15 Richard Hammond's Blast Lab 12:40 MOTD Kickabout 13:00 Coast 13:20 Ensign Pulver 15:00 The Victors 17:30 Final Score 18:30 International Rugby Union 19:30 Dad's Army 20:00 The Normans 21:00 Hans Litten v Adolf Hitler: To Stop a Tyrant 22:00 BBC Proms 2011 23:40 The Rob Brydon Show

00:35 Jaws 2 02:35 The Zone 04:40 Columbo: Prescription Murder 06:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 Ten Mile Menu 10:25 Coronation Street 12:45 This Morning: Saturday 13:45 ITV News and Weather 13:49 Meridian Weather 13:50 Countrywise 14:05 Columbo: Murder with Too Many Notes 16:05 Thunderball 18:30 Meridian News and Weather 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 New You've Been Framed!

20:00 All Star Family Fortunes 21:00 The X Factor 22:15 A Night with Will Young 23:15 The Bourne Supremacy

ALL NEW TOTAL WIPEOUT New series. Ten celebrities travel to Argentina to compete in physically demanding games on a purpose-built obstacle course. Among the participants are Big Brother host Brian Dowling, high-jumper Dalton Grant, glamour model Nicola McLean and comedian Simon Day. Hosted by Richard Hammond and Amanda Byram.

00:25 The Big Bang Theory 00:55 The Big Bang Theory 01:25 The Album Chart Show Introduces - Wretch 32 01:45 Abbey Road Debuts 02:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 06:30 Cookery School 07:25 The Treacle People 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Volkswagen Racing Cup 2011 08:25 The Grid 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 Channel 4 Presents - Mandip Sehmi 2012 10:00 Hollyoaks Music Show 10:35 Smallville 11:30 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 16:10 Channel 4 Racing 17:05 Come Dine with Me 17:35 Come Dine with Me 18:05 Come Dine with Me 18:35 Come Dine with Me 19:05 Come Dine with Me 19:35 Channel 4 News 20:05 4thought.tv 20:10 Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 21:10 Great Migrations 22:15 Sex and the City: the Movie

00:05 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:05 SuperCasino 05:05 Motorsport Mundial 05:30 Nick's Quest 05:55 The Family Recipe 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:30 Fireman Sam 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Elmo's World 08:10 The Save-Ums! 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 Hana's Helpline 08:55 Little Princess 09:05 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:40 Rupert Bear 09:55 Olivia 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:30 The Milkshake! Show 11:00 Inside Hollywood 11:05 Mexican Food Made Simple 11:35 How Do They Do It? 12:00 The Gadget Show 13:00 Celebrity Big Brother 14:05 Autumn in New York 16:05 Jane Doe: Til Death Do Us Part 17:45 The Sheepman 19:30 5 News Weekend 19:35 NCIS 20:30 Law & Order 21:20 CSI: NY 22:15 Celebrity Big Brother 23:15 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

38

Sunday 28th August 00:50 The Football League Show 02:10 BBC News 02:30 British Olympic Dreams 03:00 BBC News 03:30 HARDtalk 04:00 BBC News 04:30 Our World 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 British Olympic Dreams 07:00 Breakfast 08:40 Match of the Day 10:00 BBC News 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 Country Tracks 13:00 BBC News 13:05 Formula 1: The Belgian Grand Prix Live 16:30 My Family 17:00 Spice Britain 17:30 Escape to the Country 18:30 Songs of Praise 19:05 Deadly 60 on a Mission

00:10 Confetti 01:45 Carry On England 03:15 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor 07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:40 Octonauts 08:00 Deadly 60 08:00 Leon 08:30 Arthur 08:55 Junior MasterChef 09:25 Bear Behaving Badly 09:45 Hotel Trubble 10:15 Jinx 10:35 Wingin' It 11:00 Something for the Weekend 12:30 The Great British Bake Off 13:30 Flog It! 14:15 EastEnders 16:15 Equestrian 18:30 Formula 1: The Belgian Grand Prix Highlights 19:30 Live MotoGP 21:00 Dragons' Den 22:00 Page Eight 23:40 The Hours

00:15 ITV News and Weather 00:29 Meridian Weather 00:30 The Bourne Supremacy 01:30 The Zone 03:30 In Plain Sight 04:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:25 May the Best House Win 10:25 Dickinson's Real Deal 11:25 60 Minute Makeover 12:25 This Morning: Sunday 13:20 Survival: Tales from the Wild 14:20 ITV News and Weather 14:24 Meridian Weather 14:25 The X Factor 15:40 Midsomer Murders 17:10 Ladies of Letters 17:35 The Queen 19:35 Meridian News and Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Joanna Lumley's Nile 21:00 David Jason's Greatest Escapes 22:00 Penn & Teller: Fool Us 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:14 Meridian Weather 23:15 The Fugitive

THE DA VINCI CODE

19:35 BBC News; Regional News and weather 20:00 Britain's Hidden Heritage 21:00 Countryfile 22:00 Ocean Giants 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

Fans of author Dan Brown's blockbuster novel will not be disappointed by this sober but all-encompassing adaptation from the Oscar-winning writer/director team behind A Beautiful Mind. Ron Howard ably directs Tom Hanks as Harvard professor Robert Langdon, whose expertise in symbology sees him ensnared in an unusual Parisian murder case - one that spirals into a search for the Holy Grail and, by extension, a secret that couon plot rather than breakneck pace.

00:55 Jason Manford: Live 02:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 06:05 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind 06:15 Countdown 07:00 Sali Mali 07:05 The Hoobs 07:30 Hollyoaks 10:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 14:10 Channel 4 Presents - Joe Bestwick 2012 14:15 Undercover Boss 15:15 The Simpsons 15:45 The Simpsons 16:15 Runaway Bride 18:25 Deal or No Deal 19:25 Channel 4 News 19:55 4thought.tv 20:00 Channel 4 Presents Hannah Cockroft 2012 20:05 Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 21:00 Holiday Hijack 22:00 Rush Hour 3 23:45 Beverly Hills Cop II

00:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:05 SuperCasino 05:05 The FBI Files 05:50 Meals in Moments 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Elmo's World 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:15 The Save-Ums! 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 Hana's Helpline 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Animal Families 11:00 Inside Hollywood 11:05 Emergency Bikers 12:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:00 Celebrity Big Brother 14:00 The Bachelor 15:00 The Bounty Hunter 16:35 Riders of Vengeance 18:10 5 News Weekend 18:15 Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle 20:10 The Da Vinci Code 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

39

Monday 29th August

00:45 02:10 03:10 04:10 04:40 04:45 05:00 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:00 10:45 11:45 12:15 12:45 13:30 13:45 13:55 14:55 16:25 18:15 19:00 19:20 19:30 Tattoo 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:10 23:15

Texas Rangers Dragons' Den Holby City The Good Cook Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Heir Hunters Homes Under the Hammer Fake Britain Cash in the Attic Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Total Wipeout StreetDance The Incredibles Pointless BBC News Regional News Programmes The Royal Edinburgh Military 2011 Bang Goes the Theory EastEnders A Question of Sport New Tricks BBC News Regional News and Weather The Field of Blood

01:25 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:40 07:00 07:10 07:15 07:30

MotoGP Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Close Little Red Tractor Dipdap Let's Celebrate Octonauts Special - The

Great Penguin Race 07:55 Roar 08:30 The Jungle Book 08:40 Deadly Art 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:25 LazyTown 09:50 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 10:00 The Koala Brothers 10:10 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:10 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:30 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Kerwhizz 11:05 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Ill Met by Moonlight 14:15 Diagnosis Murder 15:00 Animal Park 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! Ten of the Best 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Wonderstuff 20:30 Victorian Pharmacy 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Antiques Master 22:00 The Conspiracy Files 23:00 Ruth Jones' Summer Holiday 23:40 Shooting Stars

01:40 The Zone 03:00 Motorsport UK 03:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 The Jeremy Kyle Show 08:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 Dinner Date 11:30 Dickinson's Real Deal 12:30 Murder, She Wrote: the Last Free Man 14:10 ITV News and Weather 14:25 Meridian News and Weather 14:30 Midsomer Murders 16:30 Diamonds Are Forever 18:45 Funniest Ever You've Been Framed!

19:30 Meridian Tonight 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise Kitchen 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Agatha Christie's Poirot 23:45 ITV News and Weather 23:59 Meridian Weather

STEPHEN FRYS 100 GREATEST GADGETS The actor presents a countdown of his favourite devices and contraptions, all of which have revolutionised aspects of people's lives, including the tin opener, trouser press, answering machine, apple peeler, iron and MP3 player. With contributions by gadget enthusiasts Charlie Brooker, Jo Brand, Jon Snow and Heston Blumenthal, who shares a novel use he has found for the SodaStream

01:45 Stand Up for the Week 02:30 IAU Trail World Championships 03:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 06:00 Channel 4 Presents - Will Bayley 2012 06:05 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind: Harness Racing 06:10 Countdown 06:55 Sali Mali 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 According to Jim 09:50 Frasier 10:55 Channel 4 Presents - Jody Cundy 2012 11:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 15:10 Three in a Bed 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:15 4thought.tv 20:20 Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 21:00 Stephen Fry's 100 Greatest Gadgets

00:00 Losing One of My Giant Legs: Extraordinary People 01:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Great Artists 05:35 Divine Designs 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:40 Fireman Sam 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 The WotWots 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Olivia 09:55 Milkshake! Monkey 10:00 Little Princess 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 Celebrity Big Brother 14:05 Neighbours 14:35 Mutiny on the Bounty 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:30 New Cowboy Builders 20:20 Alone Among Grizzlies 22:00 Soho Blues 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

40

Tuesday 30th August

00:15 The Celebrity Apprentice USA 00:55 Life or Something like It 02:40 Raymond Blanc's Kitchen Secrets 03:10 Can't Take It with You 04:10 Animal 24:7 04:55 Antiques Road Trip 05:40 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Fake Britain 12:30 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather 16:05 Sorry, I've Got No Head 16:35 Bear Behaving Badly 17:00 Gimme a Break 17:30 Horrible Histories 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 Harry's Arctic Heroes 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Donor Mum: The Children I've Never Met

00:10 01:40 02:35 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00

The Stepford Wives Torchwood: Miracle Day Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday

05:30 HARDtalk 05:40 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor 07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:45 Octonauts 07:55 Roar 08:30 The Jungle Book 08:40 Deadly Art 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:25 LazyTown 09:50 Bob the Builder 10:00 The Koala Brothers 10:10 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Kerwhizz 11:05 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 They Were Not Divided 14:15 Diagnosis Murder 15:00 Animal Park 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! Ten of the Best 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Dragons' Den 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas 23:30 Newsnight

00:00 Stay Alive 01:35 The Zone 03:35 Champions League Weekly 04:05 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 House Hunt in France 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Grimefighters 21:00 Cops with Cameras 22:00 Unforgiven 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Dreamcatcher

INSIDE NATURES GIANTS New series. Mark Evans and Joy Reidenberg travel to Australia to dissect a camel, revealing how the species has managed to thrive in such a hostile environment, and exploring the structure of the animal's hump. The creatures were introduced to the country by European settlers, but the advent of roads and cars made them redundant, and their owners released them into the desert.

00:05 Alan Carr: Tooth Fairy Live 01:10 360 Sessions 01:40 Rockfeedback Presents: Primavera 02:05 4Play: Frank Turner 02:20 My Name Is Earl 02:45 Laid Off 03:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 06:45 Yo Gabba Gabba!

07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 According to Jim 09:25 According to Jim 10:00 Frasier 10:30 Frasier 11:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 12:50 Channel 4 News Summary 12:55 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 15:10 Three in a Bed 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 21:00 Inside Nature's Giants 22:00 Seven Dwarves 23:00 Shameless

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Grey's Anatomy 01:55 SuperCasino 05:05 Meals in Moments 05:15 How Not to Decorate 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:40 Fireman Sam 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 The WotWots 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Olivia 09:55 Milkshake! Monkey 10:00 Little Princess 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 The Family Recipe 16:20 Jane Doe: Yes, I Remember it Well 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Mexican Food Made Simple 20:30 5 News Update 21:00 Children of 9/11: Revealed 22:00 CSI: Miami 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

41

Wednesday 31st August

00:30 Is Breast Best? Cherry Healey Investigates 00:30 Weatherview 01:35 Britain's Bravest Cops 02:20 Can't Take It with You 03:20 Wonderstuff 03:50 Saints and Scroungers 04:20 Antiques Road Trip 05:05 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Fake Britain 12:30 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; 16:05 Sorry, I've Got No Head 16:35 Bear Behaving Badly 17:00 School of Silence 17:30 Serious Explorers: Livingstone 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 National Treasures Live 21:00 Village SOS 22:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Live at the Apollo 23:45 National Lottery Update bbc2 00:20 01:20 02:15 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30

India on Four Wheels The Tudors Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report

04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:05 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor 07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:45 Octonauts 07:55 Roar 08:30 The Jungle Book 08:40 Deadly Art 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Paradise Cafe 09:25 LazyTown 09:50 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 10:00 The Koala Brothers 10:10 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:10 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:30 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Kerwhizz 11:05 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Coast 12:40 Dangerous Moonlight 14:15 Diagnosis Murder 15:00 Animal Park 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! Ten of the Best 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 20:00 Escape to the Country 21:00 Natural World: The Woman Who Swims With Killer Whales 22:00 Horizon 23:00 Have I Got News for You 23:30 Newsnight

02:00 The Zone 04:00 Crossing Jordan 04:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 House Hunt in France 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:05 Weather 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Working Life - Getting the Balance Right: Tonight 21:00 Lewis 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather

LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION New series. Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer help two couples search for their ideal properties. Rob and Hilary are searching for a family home in Hitchin, Hertfordshire, but finding one on their budget of £250,000 has been a struggle. Rupreet and Sundeep should be able to locate a house in that will suit them with £380,000 to spend - but not without abandoning their postcode snobbery and obsession with Pinner, an expensive part of Harrow, London

00:05 Chris Moyles' Quiz Night 00:55 UK & Ireland Poker Tour 02:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 04:00 Sailing 04:25 The Grid 04:55 I Was a Male War Bride 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The Hoobs 08:10 Freshly Squeezed 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 According to Jim 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Help! My House Is Falling Down 12:00 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Channel 4 Presents - Jody Cundy 2012 13:10 The Gift Horse 15:05 Channel 4 Presents Hannah Cockroft 2012 15:10 Three in a Bed 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Location, Location, Location 22:00 9/11: The Firemen's Story 23:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Uncut 23:45 Shameless 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Dante's Peak

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 00:55 CSI: NY 01:50 SuperCasino 05:05 Meals in Moments 05:15 How Not to Decorate 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:40 Fireman Sam 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 The WotWots 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:05 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:20 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Little Princess 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 The Memory Keeper's Daughter 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Garden ER 20:30 5 News Update 21:00 Emergency Bikers 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother: Live Eviction 23:00 JLC: Living Las Vegas

42

Thursday 1st September

00:30 Bringing Down the House 02:15 Raymond Blanc's Kitchen Secrets 02:45 Bang Goes the Theory 03:15 Country Tracks 04:10 Antiques Road Trip 04:55 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 Panorama 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 Fake Britain 12:30 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; 16:05 Sorry, I've Got No Head 16:35 Bear Behaving Badly 17:00 Gimme a Break 17:30 Richard Hammond's Blast Lab 17:30 Deadly 60 Bites 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Watchdog 22:00 Torchwood: Miracle Day 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Our War

04:55 Close 07:00 Little Red Tractor 07:10 Dipdap 07:15 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:30 Garth and Bev 07:45 Octonauts 07:55 Roar 08:30 The Jungle Book 08:40 Deadly Art 08:55 Newsround 09:00 The Scooby-Doo Show 09:25 LazyTown 09:50 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 10:00 The Koala Brothers 10:10 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Kerwhizz 11:05 Gigglebiz 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Coast 12:40 Bombardier 14:15 Diagnosis Murder 15:00 Animal Park 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! Ten of the Best 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Coast 21:00 Monty Halls' Great Irish Escape 22:00 Jig 23:30 Newsnight 23:30 Weather

01:30 The Zone 03:35 The River 05:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 House Hunt in France 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Working Life - Life After Work: Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 9/11: Day That Changed the World 23:45 ITV News and Weather

WATCHDOG

bbc2 00:20 01:20 02:10 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45

The Secret War on Terror The Tudors Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today

New series of Watchdog starts tonight. Anne Robinson, Matt Allwright and Chris Hollins return to investigate more consumer issues and expose rogue traders. They begin by examining the soaring cost of household energy bills, the Dukan diet, compulsory tipping on cruise ships and an airport car-parking company.

00:50 V Festival 2011 01:50 The Album Chart Show Introduces - Mini Mansions 02:00 The Album Chart Show: Spotlight 02:15 Without a Trace 03:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 06:00 Countdown 06:45 Yo Gabba Gabba!

07:10 Sali Mali 07:15 The Hoobs 08:05 Freshly Squeezed 08:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:00 According to Jim 10:00 Frasier 11:00 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 12:45 Channel 4 News Summary 12:50 Live Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 14:45 The Big Bang Theory 15:10 Three in a Bed 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Athletics: IAAF World Championships 2011 21:00 Country House Rescue 22:00 The Killing 23:00 Undercover Boss USA

00:00 The Beat Goes On 01:00 International Twenty20 Cricket 01:55 SuperCasino 05:05 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:15 How Not to Decorate 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 07:40 Fireman Sam 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 The WotWots 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Little Princess 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Meerkat Manor 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Taking a Chance on Love 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Meerkat Manor 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 How Do They Do It? 20:30 5 News Update 21:00 Croc Man 21:00 5 News at 9 22:00 New Cowboy Builders 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

Friday, August 26, 2011

43

44

Friday, August 26, 2011

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

10 cold drinks /snack vending machines with sites 44,900 euros.

Excellent cash income, no overhead, operate from home 31,000 euros NETT per year one day p.w. to service.25 Pringle vending machines with sites 14,900 euros 250 euros per week NETT guaranteed, machines and sites available individually. 965 326 442 / 659 696 455 (09) Bar for sale. Quesada area.

Going cheap. For information pack, email: . Tel: 688 800 960 (16)

CHURCH SERVICES

11:00am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11:00am. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome 966 799 273 // 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer.

Home groups meet during the week.

All welcome from any church background or none.

For further information contact PilarChristian.

CommunityChurch@gmail.c om or contact Reverend Eddie on 966 7693 00 or 650 509 606. Reg No:2009-SG/A

CARS FOR SALE 1995 VW. Westfalia Campervan 1.9 Diesel .

New Engine 2007. Many Extras.

11-000 euros Immaculate Condition.

International Christian Assembly. Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non-denominational. Sunday services 11:00am. Children’s Church

AIR CONDITIONING BOUNCY CASTLE

Details and Photos email ann.nicklin@hotmail.com Tel 685 777 254 (26)

FOR SALE Large full equipped internet cafe, computer repair shop & postal service, prime location, well established (10 yrs) Guardamar. Call 697 529 194 (25)

HAIRDRESSER English mobile hairdresser.

20 years experience. Prices from 6 euros. Almoradi, Algorfa, Benijofer, Rojales, Quesada, Guardamar, San Luis, Torrevieja areas. Call Jeri on 966 318 550 / 698 257 200. (25)

PERSONAL Attractive sexy couple looking for femine women for threesome fun and friendship. Genuine, clean & discreet, within 1 hour of Murcia. Contact 634 364 731(23)

PETS 2 Siamese kittens, free to good home. Both are chocolate point and white Ready in 2 weeks, both parents can be seen. Call 603 121 785 for more info(25) 5 month old Collie Cross Pup free to good home Full time jobs force reluctant parting He is brown with collie markings and has green eyes! a very handsome dog, fully house trained

SECURITY

Luxury appartments, 2/3 bedrooms in San Miguel De Salinas.

Floor heating, Elevator, Roof terrace with swimming pool, from 385 euros/month Also holiday rentals and appartments in San Miguel de Salinas from 350 euros / month. 966 723 437 and 616 487 493 (27) Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 49, 2nd floor one bedroom apartment situated conveniently located in the town centre of Torrevieja, with a small sun balcony overlooking the lovely communal pool. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626

397 397 Ref: 78, South facing 3 bedroomed property situated injardin Del Mar VII, with communal pool nearby.

Close to amenities. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restaurants and bars. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops.

Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

SPORTS EQUIPMENT

SWIMMING POOL MAINTENANCE

and is a big bundle of fun!

Call 603 121 785 (25)

PROPERTY FOR RENT

GARDENING

BUILDER REMOVALS

CAR MECHANIC

CARPENTER

Ref: 128, A lovely One bedroom 2nd floor apartment, American style kitchen, Lounge with patio doors to balcony, in the San Luis area. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104, Lovely Two Bedroom Apartment in Torrevieja, within walking distance of Friday Market and the beach. The Property is close to the Habaneras Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 155, Luxurious Three Bedroom Villa With Private Pool, in Quesada Close to shops and restaurants within a five minute drive, and Guadamar Beach is within a ten minute drive. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment within a 5

VAN HIRE

LOCKSMITH

45

Friday, August 26, 2011 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 708, A lovely two bedroom, one bathroom corner ground floor apartment with a spacious patio & Residents off road parking.

Communal pool near by.

Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE Gran Alacant, corner semi detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bathrooms, large garden, enclosed terrace, fully furnished, private drive for 2 cars, on gated desirable urbanisation Monte Faro, many facilities priced for quick sale 185,000 Tel 680333242 House for sale. Santiago de la Ribera, 3-4 bedrooms, lovely garden, two balconies, two fireplaces, quiet neighbourhood, five minutes walk to beach.

Tel: 616596647 or 672192482 (22).

Balsares, terraced 4 bed-

roomed house, 3 bathrooms, large underbuild, private underground parking direct to house, small gated urbanisation, directly over looking proposed new golf course opposite Gran Alacant, priced for quick sale at original off plan price 180.000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath mid terraced Altomar 1, views of Alicante Bay, close to communal pool, walking distance to bars and resturants opportunity at reduced price 145,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, front line, 2 bed, 1 bath, downstairs toilet, fully furnished, roof terrace, walking distance to beaches, large communal and resturants, beach front property priced for quick sale 125,000 Tel 680333242 Quesada, detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bath, all large rooms, front enclosed conservatory, fully furnished, oiled fuelled heating, outdoor poolside kitchen and bbq area enclosed, large pool, outside toilet, garage for 2 cars, newly refurbished, established garden with fruit trees, set in a cul de sac on 1000m2, the over-

PROPERTIES REQUIRED

all plot can be divided, as registered as two plots, so this house could be a substantial investment opportunity, situated in the Dona pepe area close to Quesada town centre, priced 299,000 negotiable Tel 680333242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles.

It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 510, €79,999.

Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 146, €85,000. Three bedroom Two bathroom quad house in Dream Hills.

Off road parking on the front driveway with gates that can

be padlocked for security.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €195,000.

Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool.

Garage to side of house.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 30, €119,000. Two bedroom detached house with large front terrace. This villa is in the Punta Marina area close to Playa Flamenca , Close to amenities.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off-road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 128, €34,950. One bedroom 2nd floor apartment located in San Luis.

American style kitchen, Lounge with patio doors to balcony, with lovely views in the San Luis area.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

TUITION LEARN EFT. Cousin to acupuncture, no needles, tap with fingers. Helps pain, anxiety, illness, phobias, smoking etc.

AAMET approved courses and Trainer Marie Holliday. www.eftspain.com eftspain@yahoo.com 673 976 313. (29)

SITUATIONS VACANT

PLUMBERS

PETS

BUSINESS GROUP

FURNITURE

PAVING

SHUTTERS

MOSQUITOS

WANTED

SURVEYS

NEWS AGENTS

SIGNS

TATTOOS

LOCKSMITH

46

Friday, August 26, 2011

SPAIN PAIN AS DUTCH HIT NO.1

THE Netherlands have replaced Spain at the top of FIFA's world rankings, with England climbing two places to fourth.

The world and European champions have dropped to second after losing ranking points in a friendly defeat by Italy.

England, despite having their friendly against the Dutch postponed, have risen because of Brazil's loss to Germany.

The Republic of Ireland went up two places to 31st, while Scotland leapt six places to 55th and Northern Ireland rose three places to 59th. But Wales fell to 117th.

In topping the rankings for the first time, the Netherlands become only the seventh nation to hold the No.1 spot Argentina, Brazil, France, Germany and Italy are the others.

NOTTS AND JUVE IN STRIPE HYPE NOTTS COUNTY are to play Juventus next month to mark the opening of the Italian side's new 41,000seater stadium. The clubs have been linked since 1903 when Juve were inspired by the Magpies to change their shirts from pink to black and white.

The friendly match will take place in Turin on September 8. A return fixture between the two sides at Meadow Lane is planned before the start of the 2012/13 season.

Juventus are expected to wear pink for the first half in Turin before changing to their new home strip in the second half, when the Magpies will don a specially-commissioned white strip.

It was John Savage, an Englishman playing for Juventus, who in 1903 arranged for replacement shirts to be sent to the Italian club by a County-supporting friend back home, and Juventus have worn the black-and-white stripes Notts County traditionally play in ever since.

‘EXHAUSTED’ CAV QUITS VUELTA MARK CAVENDISH abandoned the Vuelta a Espana on the race's fourth stage after falling behind the main peloton on a tough category-one climb and quitting with around 40km to go.

The HTC-Highroad rider had struggled in hot weather on Monday and began Tuesday's stage to Sierra Nevada 16 minutes and 48 seconds off the leaders.

Cavendish, 26, who won the sprinters' green jersey at the Tour de France in July, had yet to score any sprint points.

A team source said he was exhausted following the Tour de France and would now look to recuperate prior to the world championships in September.

The stage was won by Daniel Moreno who closed to within 43 seconds of overall leader Sylvain Chavanel.

Cavendish is the second HTC-Highroad rider to quit after Australian Matt Goss abandoned the race on its first day.

The team will fold at the end of 2011 and Cavendish has been linked with a move to Team Sky, who are led by British Cycling performance director Dave Brailsford.

Cavendish, who won five stages in this year's Tour de France in taking his tally to 20, hopes to claim his first roadrace world title on September 25 in Copenhagen. Great

WORLD SPORTS ROUNDUP with Mick Hardy from Kidease

Britain have qualified to enter a team of eight riders, one short of the maximum.

SKY-HIGH SUTTON TEAMT Sky's fortunes at the Vuelta a Espana improved on stage two as Australian Chris Sutton sprinted to victory in Playas de Orihuela.

Sutton profited from a sharp climb in the final kilometre, moving past Spaniard Vicente Reynes to win.

And Sky had reason to celebrate, 24 hours after a chaotic team time trial in which they finished third-from-last.

Italian Daniele Bennati took the leader's red jersey, with Britain's Bradley Wiggins 55 seconds back in 84th spot.

Sutton, 26, nephew of British Cycling track coach Shane Sutton, celebrated the biggest victory of his career and his first in a Grand Tour.

"To win and to deliver it for all of Team Sky is a dream come true - I can't believe it," he told the team’s website "Bradley looked after me for the last 20km along with Kurt Arvesen.’’

WOODS ON PRESIDENTIAL PATH TIGER WOODS has revealed he may play in the PGA Tour Fall Series in a bid to win a place in November's President’s Cup team event.

The 35-year-old former world No.1, who has slipped to 36 in the rankings, has struggled for form and fitness this year and missed the cut at the recent US PGA Championship.

Woods, who has not won a title since November 2009, has played in every US President’s Cup team since 1998. "I want to be on the team," he said. "I'm just going to try to get better."

After failing to make the cut when rounds of 77 and 73 left him at 10 over, Woods was not scheduled to play again until the Australian Open from 10-13 November.

However, US skipper Fred Couples said: "He can't just show up the week before in Australia. I have made it clear that whoever I picked will be playing the Australian tournament the week before. But I need him to play more than just there."

PETTERSEN TAKES SAFEWAY SUZANN pettersen rallied from nine shots back to win the 2011 safeway classic, recording an 18th hole to defeat na yeon choi on the first hole of a play-off.

Pettersen fired the lowest round of the week, a seven-under 64, at Pumpkin Ridge and finished her round nearly two hours before Choi bogeyed the 18th to force the extra contest.

In the playoff, Choi's second shot on the par-4 18th went into the water to the right of the green, and she missed a putt for bogey before Pettersen, who lost in a playoff to M.J. Hur at the 2009 Safeway Classic, sank her winning par putt.

For Pettersen, a native of Norway, it was her second LPGA

Mayor kicks off on a loser…

San Fulgencio 1 Sporting Orihuela 3

SAN FULGENCIO started the season with their first friendly against Sporting Orihuela - and what a fantastic game for the fans!

Watched by approximately150 supporters,

including new Mayor Carlos Ramirez, the home side got off to a very strong start.

They totally controlled the early exchanges and took the lead after 20 minutes through a penalty.

San Fulgencio continued to dominate affairs and

had chances to extend their lead before making a triple substitution just before half time.

At the start of the second half the game changed, Orihuela taking control and in the 63rd minute equalised with a finely worked goal.

Sporting continued to have the majority of possession and in the 75th minute took the lead.

And although both sides had chances, Orihuela sealed the victory with a great free-kick into the top right corner in the 85th minute.

Tour title of the year and the eighth of her career. She also won the 2011 Sybase Match Play Championship back in May. Pettersen, who recently captured the Ladies European Tour's Ladies Irish Open, will now move up to No. 2 in the Rolex Rankings behind Yani Tseng.

HOME RULE FOR CATRIONA SCOTLAND’S Catriona Matthew completed a commanding 10-stroke victory at the Aberdeen Ladies Scottish Open.

The 41-year-old from East Lothian held a four-shot lead heading into the final round after a course-record 65 at her home course on Friday.

Despite the pressure of playing just five minutes’ from her North Berwick home, she fired a closing six under par 66 on a fine and breezy last day at Archerfield Links, where she was given honorary membership after winning the 2009 Ricoh Women’s British Open.

It paved the way for her fourth Ladies European Tour win and a €33,000 cheque.

First-round leader Hannah Jun of the United States carded a solid final-round of 72 to finish second, a stroke clear of third-placed Caroline Afonso of France.

Matthew finished on 15-under 201 after blowing the field away with six birdies and a single bogey in her first eight holes.

Said the champion: “I’m absolutely delighted to win on my home turf on a course I’m a member at and I live along the road. Playing in front of a lot of family and friends, there was definitely pressure and it makes it extra special.’’

ROOKIE FISHER CZECHS IN OLIVER FISHER carded a final-round 69 to win the Czech Open and capture his first European Tour title.

The 22-year-old Englishman finished on 13 under, two shots ahead of Sweden's Mikael Lundberg, to improve on his previous best of two runners-up spots.

"It feels fantastic," he said.

"I can't really explain what it means."

Starting the round level with Scotland's Steven O'Hara, Fisher birdied six holes, but also carded three bogeys coming home.

The feat was all the more impressive considering Fisher came into the week 224th on The Race to Dubai and having missed 20 of his first 21 cuts this season.

Lundberg, chasing his third victory, also signed for a 69, while Paraguay's Fabrizio Zanotti was two shots further back.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

IT’S 18 years since I won the last of my 55 England caps and although intrinsically rugby union is the same 15man game we all know, it has changed almost out of all recognition.

The onset of professionalism has brought a hard, big-hitting, defenceloaded game which is trying in my view to emulate its northern cousin, rugby league.

Players are quite rightly bigger, stronger and faster (and so they should be, training all day every day and not holding down a proper job!)

From one to 15, the players are expected to excel in all aspects - whether it be backs hitting rucks and mauls and clearing out the opposition, or props and locks cluttering up the back line and making appearances out on the wings.

A WHOLE NEW BALL GAME Bigger, stronger and faster – but today’s robots are no Campeses

Changing But I’m not so sure that the game is changing for the better. Gone are the days of your silky-smooth, off-thecuff runners such as Rory Underwood, David Campese, Serge Blanco, Jeremy Guscott and Jonathan Davies, to name but a few.

These guys were amazing to watch and could turn a game with the twitch of a head.

To replace them, in come your big, muscular, straightrunning, hard-hitting, perfectly-drilled robots. It’s all becoming a bit predictable!

Whether I would have wanted the pressures of professional sport is questionable but had I and the players of my era had the chance in today's game, I am sure we could and would have adapted. Having said that, I would hardly relish the

‘The game in my view is trying to to emulate its northern thought of 18-stone, 6ft 7in Matt Banahan running at me full pelt. And he's only a winger!

As amateurs, we had the best of both worlds, travelling and playing against the finest players on the planet, yet

being able to escape the game’s pressures and daily routines and come home to our everyday jobs and lives.

But what memories I have...both good and bad.

I played in the first two World Cups and England’s

ITV ORIHUELA HEAD FOR RUGBY’S BIG LEAGUE Training starts at Orihuela RFC on August 30 in preparation for what looks like a challenging season ahead with a lot more games Orihuela will probably be playing in the 10team Murcia League, so plenty of local rugby for everybody if it is confirmed. More news as it develops.

Visitors and traders at the Moncayo Market raised 39.10€ over the summer in aid of the Butterfly Children, while So Bar in Benimar chipped in with 22.08€. A big thankyou to everyone for helping.

The club hopes to raise a lot more for the Butterfly Children through the sale of signed

Leicester Tigers and London Irish shirts plus a signed Wigan rugby league ball. For details, contact Garry Holland at the Moncayo Market on Tuesdays and Saturdays or call him on 692 767 242.

Alternatively come along to the Rojales Steak House today (August 26) between 12noon and 16:00.

ITV Orihuela train on Tuesdays and Thursdays at the Miguel Hernandez University. New players are always welcome no matter of what age or skill level.

For more information call Garry or (Spanish) Oscar on 600 871 606.

Football strike called off

THE Spanish Primera Division season will finally get under way tomorrow (Saturday) after a second weekend of strike action was averted yesterday.

Talks between the Liga de Futbol Profesional (LFP)

and Association of Spanish Footballers (AFE) finally reached a resolution yesterday.

The AFE wanted a guaranteed fund to protect players' wages in the event of their clubs being declared insolvent.

According to the AFE, clubs in Spain owe around €50m in unpaid salaries to more than 200 players from the end of last season.

A statement on the AFE website confirmed the matter was now resolved.

fortunes could not have contrasted more. Beaten in the pool stages in 1987, we made the final at Twickenham four years later – only to lose 12-6 to Australia.

That was one of the bad memories, after starting as favourites in front of the Queen and our home crowd, not to mention the 60 million or so watching around the world.

How different to the joy of sitting on the settee at home with my two daughters in 2003 and watching Martin Johnson and his boys avenge our defeat at 12 years earlier by beating the Aussies on their own patch.

Very, very sweet.

Back in 1987, England didn’t even get to New Zealand, where most of the inaugural tournament was staged. Our pool matches were played in Australia and we failed even

to make the knock-out stages. So we never reached NZ shores, let alone make a meaningful challenge.

Mind you, England were a pretty poor team in those days and our fate was sealed with a loss to the Welsh in Brisbane, which made it even worse. Another bad memory!

Four years later, we were a much better side and despite the disappointment of losing that final showdown with Australia, had the distinction of following up a Five Nations Grand Slam with World Cup victories over France in Paris and Scotland at Murrayfield in the semi-final.

Remember big Gavin Hastings missing that lastminute penalty in front of the posts which would have taken the game into extra time? A good memory, that.

Well, maybe not if you’re Scottish...

David Campese

Rory Underwood

Gunners goners From Back Page the rearguard challenge - Manchester United, Inter Milan and one or two surprise guys maybe from far-flung parts.

I honestly can't see further than Barca, particularly since Cesc Fabregas appears to have hit the ground running following his signing from Arsenal.

Lots of people will fancy Manchester City's chances purely because of the names in their squad.

But it's too soon for them and they would be better off concentrating on a real push for the Premier League title, which I strongly fancy them for.

Well, someone has to challenge the mighty Man United eventually - and who better than their noisy, rich neighbours?

Sir Alex Ferguson would dearly love to add another Champions League title to United's honours list and take a step nearer Liverpool's proud record of five

wins. A lot will still depend on those last minute transfer dealings before next week's deadline and if United land Wesley Sneijder, as they are strongly fancied to, it will strengthen their claims dramatically.

They will be itching to finish off the summer buying with a big-name capture after their neighbours’ endeavours in landing Sergio Aguero and now Samir Nasri, along with the other players they have brought in.

United haven't exactly been idle in the transfer market. Ashley Young looks to be a marvellous purchase but Sneijder would be the icing on the cake for the Red Devils.

His arrival would see them installed as strong favourites to retain their Premier League crown - and take some giant steps towards matching Barcelona in the chase for European club football’s greatest prize.

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Friday, August 26, 2011

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GONERS!

STEVE BOTT reports

where near enough threat up front.

ARSENAL shouldn’t get too carried away with their success in qualifying for the group stage of the Champions League.

They had the perfect chance to polish off one of the game's big names after restricting the Gunners to a 1-0 win at The Emirates. And after taking the lead in the home leg to level things up, they should have gone on to take the tie.

They have as much chance of winning the tournament as I have of becoming the next Pope. And I've not been to church since my christening!

The opposite happened and it was Arsenal who came away with the brownie points for their recovery - but they will need to go some to get anywhere near the later stages of the competition despite a reasonably good track record in recent seasons.

Wednesday night's away victory over Udinese was a step in the right direction, but the Italians were hardly Barcelona class and didn't pose any-

No, the team to beat will once again be Barcelona with the usual suspects bringing up Turn to Page 47

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