The Courier Week 29

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Edition 29

www.thecourier.es

Friday, September 9, 2011

OUTCASTS

Red tape leaves villagers in limbo for four years By REBECCA MARKS

BEWILDERED British residents of a local village have been living in limbo for years – because Almoradi Town Hall refuses to issue them with Habitation Certificates. Patience is wearing thin for homeowners at the ‘Jennifer’ development in Heredades, who are also still waiting for the Town Hall to give them Licences of Occupation. Without these documents, the Town Hall won’t provide proper services such as street lighting, refuse collection and street cleaning. It also means that those with a mortgage cannot sell their homes, and should not have been able to obtain water and electric supply contracts in their own name. Aside from three properties, all other houses on the site were purchased as holiday homes whilst many still remain unsold. Resident Bill Andrews relocated to Spain with his partner, Susan (we’ve changed their names to protect their identity) when their property was completed four years ago, at which point they were keen to ensure that all I’s were dotted and T’s crossed. However, on approaching the Town Hall to collect his

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The ‘Jennifer’ development: Residents’ patience is wearing thin

Brits held as police probe €150,000 Costa Blanca rentals scam A BRITISH couple have been arrested by the Civil Guard over an alleged holiday-rentals scam in the Costa Blanca involving more than €150,000. It also left holidaymakers devastated when they came out to the properties they had rented – only to find the owners living there. The arrested couple, who live in Mojacar, Almeria, advertised properties available for shortterm let which were not in fact available for rent but occupied by their legitimate owners. Named only as John Anthony T, aged 41, and 37 year old Amanda Jane T, they advertised online on

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Have you seen the size of that dog’s ears on Page 3? TELEPHONE

679 096 309 96 672 6437 JUNGLE DRUMS E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Alto del Moncayo s/n, Guardamar del Segura, 03140, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 672 64 37 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 96 672 6437 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 96 672 6437 616 332 178 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Denise La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 616 332 178 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Writers Donna Gee Sally Bengtsson Rebecca Marks Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Harold Heys Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe Mick Hardy

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96 672 7334

STATEMENT Re: STABBING IN British couple held over rentals scam CABO ROIG, JULY 5th, 2011 From Page One DUE to increased Media and online publication of the above events, we have been advised by our lawyers to make the follow statement then there will be no further statement made prior to the court case. Flannigan's is a family friendly sports bar, which has a zero tolerance policy regarding drugs on the premises. Flannigan's Bar is owned by an Englishman who was not stabbed, the friend who was stabbed is Irish who lives in Spain with his wife & three children, and he is NOT an ex-bouncer!! and is still receiving treatment for a punched lung. The other young lad who was stabbed is also English and was not working at the bar he was only socialising on the terrace while on holiday, he has since returned home to England to recover, as he was traumatised by the attack. There are no Spanish involved in this case other than the judicial system, and we would like to take this opportunity to

thank the Guardia Civil for their continued help in the ongoing investigation in this case, unlike what has been reported in the UK. All witnesses are either British or Irish and were advised by the judge of their individual responsibilities regarding their statements and identification process when at court. There has never been any compassion shown in any reporting for the innocent victims in this case, who could have so nearly lost their lives over a few minutes of madness, fuelled by a cocktail of drink and drugs!!!. There are many comments being stated regarding the witnesses, owner, victims etc that are not correct, and we reserve our legal rights through our Lawyer & Barristers to take any action necessary both in Spain and in the UK if so required. For and on Behalf of

several sites with photographs and descriptions of each property. Their victims, which the Civil Guard said could number more than 60 in the UK, Portugal, France, Italy and Belgium, made the bookings online and were then emailed back by the property management company. There was, however, no further communication once the deposit and then the remainder of the cost had been

transferred into the couple’s account. Some of those affected travelled out to the property they had rented in good faith, only to find it occupied by the owners. The Civil Guard investigation began in February after an official complaint from a French woman to officers at the barracks in Pilar de la Horadada. It was followed by denuncias from foreign nationals with similar stories.

FLANNIGAN'S BAR, CABO ROIG, SPAIN

Caught - after 12 years on run Publication Published by Rainbow Media, S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A - 132 - 2011 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features. Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non-appearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re-publication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

A SUSPECTED paedophile who fled from Britain 12 years ago to avoid facing trial has been arrested in Spain. According to Spain’s interior ministry, the 60-year-old man – identified only by his initials as L.K – was a in the town of Torres de Segre in

north-eastern Spain.The former Bath newsagent now faces 18 charges of sexual abuse of minors aged between 13 and 15, who are believed to have worked in his shop. He was originally charged in 1999 with seven offences involving three children, but

Monday Partly Cloudy High Temperature: 27°C RealFeel: 26°C

skipped the country while on bail. Avon and Somerset police re-opened the case in 2011 after two new victims emerged. Both had been interviewed as part of the original enquiry, but until this year denied that they had been assaulted.

Today Sunny High Temperature: 27°C RealFeel: 30°C

Saturday Sunny High Temperature: 31°C RealFeel: 33°C

Sunday Sunny High Temperature: 31°C RealFeel: 30°C

Tuesday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 27°C

Wednesday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 27°C

Thursday Sunny High Temperature: 28°C RealFeel: 29°C


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Torrevieja paedophile ‘cunning and manipulative’ A 57-year-old Torrevieja man has been jailed for a total of 59 YEARS for a ‘shameless’ string of sex offences against a child over an eight-year period – starting in 2002 when the girl was nine years old. Stewart Ronald Ian Andrews was also described by Judge Parkes as a "cunning and manipu-

lative" man who undertook a "classic grooming process" during his continuing abuse of a child. A jury at Reading Crown Court had unanimously found Andrews guilty on 11 of the 13 indictments against him, which included rape and attempted rape, for which he was jailed for 12 years.

He was also convicted of causing or inciting a child under 13 to engage in sexual activity and six counts of sexual activity with a child. The sentences will be served concurrently Andrews had already pleaded guilty before the trial to two counts of sexual activity with a child

At the same hearing, his son, Samuel Stuart Andrews, aged 23, of Crowthorne, Berkshire, was jailed for nine months, suspended for two years, on two counts of sexual activity with a child. He was ordered to take part in the Thames Valley Sex Offenders programme.

Det Con Emma Skinner, of Thames Valley Police’s Child Abuse Investigation Unit, said: “This is a very sad and extreme case of sexual abuse over a long period of time. ‘’We hope the substantial sentences handed out will help the victim to move on with her life.”

WATER DAY!

San Miguel plans get green light at last By REBECCA MARKS

pany called ERNA, was proven “unfit for the human consumption” by the Generalitat in 2004 after opposition parties prompted an analysis of the water, which was carried out by the Alicante School of Pharmacists. The study found that it was contaminated by nitrates and contained more than four grams of salt per litre, far greater than the normal and acceptable levels.

Parliament in June 2010, sparking the threat of action against Spain for breach of the Water Directive, that the Government began to take note. In February, the town’s Planning Officer, Sergio Correas, finally spoke of the installation of an entirely new water system for the town – only for objecWhilst having access to “Safe, clean tions by various parties, including the drinking water” is considered a basic Neighbourhood Association Archangel, human right, according to both the fronted by Manuel Gomez, to cause United Nations and European Union, further delays. Complaints there are certain parts of the world A planning meeting to discuss the Since that day, political parties, resi- issue was held at San Miguel Town where this is simply not the case. And incredibly one of them is right on dents’ committees, business owners Hall last week, when finalisation of the our doorstep in the Eagle’s Nest, Blue and individuals have battled endlessly plans for the new water supply to the Lagoon and El Galan urbanisations at with the Town Hall, and taken their town were announced. complaints as far as the Valencian San Miguel de Salinas. It was unanimously agreed that the The water in these developments, Parliament. But it was not until a peti- land allocated to the works to supply which is currently supplied by a com- tion was lodged with the European “potable” water to the urbanisations will be re-classified, and an extraordinary ‘pleno’ meeting on September 23 will consider tenders from three companies who claim they are able to supply water to the entire town in the most efficient and economical manner. During the meeting, the Mayor of San Miguel, Angel Saez Huertas, dismissed claims in the Spanish press that the successful supplier would operate in a private capacity, revealing instead that there will be close links with the Town Hall, which would guarantee that water costs would not increase significantly, as many residents EAR EAR, you cheeky monkeys! My the world. Honest! If you don’t believe had feared. name is Harbor and I can understand me, you can read all about it in the 2012 Finally, he made it clear why those chimps on Page 2 are loo- Guinness Book of Records. that residents must be regisAnd if you want the exact statistics tered on the Municipal king at me. And they thought THEY had big ones! I’m a black and tan coon- my right ear is 13.5 inches long and the Padron in order to qualify for hound - and I’ve got the longest ears in left one 12.25 inches. the change of water supply.

RESIDENTS of various urbanisations in San Miguel de Salinas have battled for years for fresh, clean drinking water - and finally their pleas seem to have been heard.

WHAT’S GOING ON EAR?

Ryanair ‘unjustified’ in rejecting child, 4, with no photo ID RYANAIR have been ordered to pay €250 to a male passenger and a four-year-old child for refusing to accept the child’s ‘Libro de Familia’ as identification. The Irish budget airline must also refund ticket costs and all expenses incurred by the pair, who were booked on a Valencia-Palma flight . Despite the Spanish Air Safety Agency, Ryanair say they will not accept the document as identification for children as it carries no photo of the passenger. The man had bought two return tickets, but the airline’s ground staff at Valencia airport refused to allow the child on the flight with just her ‘Libro de Familia’ as identification. Ryanair staff argued that their internal regulations state that children under 16 who travel with an adult must have an identity document with photograph to travel within EEC countries.

Security The Air Safety Agency considered Ryanair’s decision to refuse to allow the child to board to be ‘unjustified’. Under EU regulations, each member state must decide on the basic rules for security within its own territory, which must be followed by all airlines which operate at its airports. Spain’s regulations specify that Spanish passengers under 14 are exempt from carrying identification but are the responsibility of the adult with whom they travel. Ryanair, however, maintains it will not accept the libro de familia for children without an identity document as it carries no photo for identification. Spokesman Stephen McNamara said the terms and conditions accepted by passengers when they make their reservations, ‘‘clearly indicate that an identity document with photograph, a passport or a national identity document is required of all passengers, including children.’’


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SCARY BIKERS Fair-weather cyclists

are a wheel menace THERE'S a growing menace on the roads in Britain. It's got very few active brain cells, comes out on warm, still days and uses two wheels. It comes in various shapes and sizes but all have one thing in common. They are a curse on the roads. I refer to fair-weather cyclists, who, because of the recession, are invading the roads in ever-increasing numbers. Many are elderly, and these are the worst, because they are prone to swerve out from the kerb edge if they see a stone or drain cover in front of them and are totally oblivious to the danger they are in from traffic behind. Others are teenagers who are prone to wheeling on and off pavements and kerb edges and cycling without hands on the handlebars. Both sets of cyclists are a growing hazard on the road. Finally there is the growing lycra brigade, equipped with the latest super bike, capable of travelling at higher speeds, but liable to overtake each other without warning. Yes, I may be exaggerating just a tad, but cyclists really are becoming a menace on the roads. This is simply because the roads are not built to accommodate them plus cars, lorries, buses, caravans and motor homes - all competing for the same limited space. The recession has encouraged an

increasing number of people to take to two wheels, and all praise to them in a bid to keep fit, save money and help the environment. But what they are doing on single carriageway roads is bringing traffic down to a crawl and making people take risks in overtaking the bikes. And overall the presence of so many cycles is not doing the environment much good if there is a long line of vehicles behind, reduced to a crawl and all pumping fumes into the atmosphere.It's a nightmare for motorists trying to pass cyclists when there is a stream of traffic coming in the opposite direction. Drivers must give cyclists sufficient room and for bus and lorry drivers it must be a nightmare.

Traffic Sadly, Britain has not catered for cyclists in any meaningful way for decades. While other countries have built cycle lanes beside main roads and created cycle paths enabling cyclists to go from village to village well away from competing traffic, Britain has done next to nothing, save for putting a few signs on roads declaring them cycle routes and painting a few strips of road. And which suddenly come to an end. It's a shame that the surge in cycling has coincided with the recession, because there is no money for the creation of proper cycle lanes. It means that across the country, cyclists are seriously at risk of injury and death as they compete for road space.

TRAVEL TROUBLE I’VE been watching the battle for Essex for several days now as a council battles with the problem of how to evict a small town of ‘travellers’. They have been living for years in caravans and mobile homes on land without planning permission - and finally the

council has been given legal permission to evict them. In many ways the situation is similar to that of illegal developments in Spain, and the heartache it causes when people finally realise that time is up. As in Spain, these developments should never have happened. For far too long, Britain has not taken the decisive action needed to tackle the problem of travellers roaming from

place to place invading land and creating havoc wherever they go. The vast majority of these people are not true gypsies but those who want to avoid paying their

way in society. If such a camp gets established, within days there's a rubbish mountain, sewage is left beside hedgerows and nearby residents are bombarded by people wanting to lay substandard driveways, do gardening work at exorbitant prices and at worst are the victims of burglaries and other crimes. The hard fact is that people who want to lead a nomadic way of life should have to conform to basic rules and stay in established caravan sites. And if they have children, they should postpone their wanderings until their offspring have completed their education. The majority of society

has little patience with or tolerance of people who want to live on the cheap. It's sad that it takes so long for the establishment to grind its way through the legal nightmare so that by the time an illegal camp is moved, people have been living there for years. But hey, wait a minute - I thought these were travellers - if they've been there for years they are hardly nomads and why shouldn't they move to bricks and mortar homes? Or is it what I have said at the outset; they are simply avoiding council tax and other bills we mortals have to pay? If that's the case, give them not one jot of sympathy.


Friday, September 9, 2011

WANT TO VISIT THE ALHAMBRA? There’s an app for that…

By SALLY BENGTSSON ARMCHAIR travellers and history buffs can now see previously-hidden areas of Granada’s Alhambra Palace as 21st century technology meets 13th century Spain. For centuries, it has enchanted visitors with its fortified walls, pointed arches, towers, ornamental flourishes, carvings and spectacular gardens. The Alhambra, a fortress and palace in the city of Granada, was begun in the mid-13th century by the

Nasrid Emirs of Granada, the last Muslim rulers in Spain. Further palaces and Christian chapels were added to the complex in the following centuries, making it a fascinating mix of cultures and histories. Full of mysterious nooks and crannies as well as grand spaces, the Alhambra attracts around two million visitors a year, according to the Patronato de la Alhambra in Spain, the organisation that looks after the complex. But until now much of the palace has remained hidden

from visitors as many areas are too delicate to be opened to the public. Soon, though, some of these hidden places will be on show for the first time thanks to a sustainable tourism initiative from the Patronato de la Alhambra and the World Monuments Fund. The initiative, entitled The Hidden Alhambra, aims to expand the site for tourists – with an app. The app will allow visitors to ‘virtually’ explore delicate, closed-off areas on their iPhones or on specially designed portable electronic tablets. Hidden areas that the app will bring to light include an underground space beneath the palace of the Holy Roman Emperor Charles V, as well as storage areas, towers and pavilions. According to Norma Barbacci, Programme Director for Latin America, Spain and Portugal at the World Monuments Fund, “Visitors are not able to walk down the stairs into the silos, for example, but they can be close to them and get a lot of information.” The World Monuments Fund is also contributing $300,000 to the conservation of the Oratorio del Partal, an elaborate mid14th century chapel built during the reign of Yusuf I, and one of the oldest parts of the complex. The conservation effort will include work on the roof, carved wood ceiling and decorative plaster work. This will be incorporated into the Hidden Alhambra app. It is hoped a long-term plan of conservation works to fragile areas of the Alhambra will allow more and more of the complex to become accessible to visitors, boosting the interest in this fascinating palace and top tourist destination still further.

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GRAN SLAMMER!

Innocent doctor’s six months in jail after mix-up over mothball ‘cocaine’

THE Guardia Civil officers who opened Dr. Juan Enoc Rodríguez Lizondro’s suitcase at Madrid's Barajas airport sensed a strange odour. It came from the Panamanian medic’s meticulously folded clothes arranged in sealed bags. "They smell funny. What do they have?" one asked. "I don't know. I live with my granny. She irons my clothes with starch and then puts them in drawers with mothballs to deter moths. Maybe that's it," the doctor replied. The agent took one of the items and sprayed it. Instantly, it turned blue, as did the other 107 pieces of clothing - 19 kilos of it. To the Guardia, this meant, in principle, that they had been soaked with cocaine. It’s one of the ways drug traffickers transport their merchandise: they dilute the cocaine in water, soak the clothes in it and dry them before they put them in the suitcase.

Weak link Once they've reached their destination, they put the clothes in water again to release the drug, decant it with ammonium hydroxide, filter it and dry it. The weak link of this system is that the clothes smell like cocaine. A similar smell, apparently, to the fresh clothes that came out of the mothballed drawers of Dr. Rodríguez's grandmother. In vain, the 34-year-old devout Christian a Seventh-Day Adventist who had come to Madrid with a San Carlos III health institute scholarship to take a three-month course tried to explain that he was neither a dope dealer nor a drug mule. That he didn't drink or smoke - and definitely didn't take drugs. He was just an irreproachable doctor who worked in the emergency room in Bugaba, eight hours away from Panama City and a volunteer at his church. None of his arguments helped his cause when faced with the clear blue colour of the narcotest on his 108 pieces of clothing. Dr Rodríguez was arrested and put in jail on September 18, 2010. The Spanish attor-

Dr Rodriguez: Spent 175 days in prison ney-general requested prison for drug trafficking and the judge granted it as he thought the airport test could not have simultaneously failed 108 times. But it did. The bad luck of a fake positive and the long process to finalise the second and definitive test on his clothes left him in prison for 175 days. The clothes were sent to the Spanish Medicines Agency’s drug department lab to verify that the results of the narcotest were correct. Almost six months after his arrest at Barajas, the second and more accurate test determined there were no illicit substances in the doctor's suitcase. No signs of cocaine. "This delay has ruined my life," he said from the emergency centre where he works. "I was going to Spain full of hope and with a big project and everything turned into the biggest nightmare. It was one of those situa-

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COR LIMEY, WHERE DID ENGLISH GO?

THERE used to be a language called English – until it was murdered by our so-called friends across the Pond. And the thing that saddens me most is that we’ve wilted like wimps under a growing bombardment of ridiculous Americanisms. ‘’Can I get a burger and chips,’’ has become the staple way of ordering food for just about every young Brit under the age of 25. I’m still waiting to see someone actually do what they say…and march into the restaurant kitchen to collect their grub. Then there’s the curse of having to watch TV show hosts inanely urging British audiences, not to applaud, but to ‘’give it up’’ for some Zlist guest who’s incapable of generating spontaneous appreciation. Give up what? Pandering society. Sometimes with to Hollywood movie culture extremely negative conseby using American-speak at quences - innit? I honestly believe that every opportunity? Far better they give up the ridiculous English as we know will posturing rap culture that’s disappear within a couple of submerged become the ‘in’ thing among generations, certain segments of British under the tsunami of American influence on our young p e o p l e . Te l e v i s i o n , computer games, electronic gadgets, all sorts of technology – everything seems to emanate from

Even our kids are dining out on American-speak

language. As a professional wordsmith, I have to deal every day with the trimmings of the American Revolution. I am increasingly seeing words like ‘organisation’ and ‘realise’ spelt with a Z; rather than an S. Indeed, the spellcheck on my computer, which is set to ‘ENGLISH English’, perpetually tries to ‘correct’ the spelling to the American style. We can do nothing about the other side of the Atlantic Yanked away. It has since my childhood. Guy Fawkes the Yanks nicking our lanregurgitated in Night was the big one – guage and changing the these days. And as for been with everything went into making rules (just as they did when American films (the real word American-speak for ‘movies’, remember?), I Britain’s younger generation the best ‘Guy’ for November they pinched the game of doubt I understand even half happily swallowing the new 5, because it guaranteed rugby, turned the participants of the obscenity-filled sound- version as if it was a ‘cookie’. richer pickings from our door- into bouncy castles, and to-door ‘Penny For the Guy’ called it American Football). And that takes the biscuit. tracks these days. But for heaven’s sake, let’s It seems that English kids collections. The English language is These days, householders vow NEVER to allow words certainly not what it was 50 today are so weak-willed that they can’t fight off their are pestered by a horde of like ‘burglarize’, ‘gotten’ and years ago. Back in the 1960s, Britain absorption into 21st century masked midgets demanding ‘’winningest’ to creep into our was king. The Beatles ruled America. Because, believe sweets (or should that be everyday speech. Even if that means stepthe music world, England me, they are being sucked in ‘candy’?). With menaces, were world football cham- relentlessly to the point that too. Presumably the sweets ping up to the plate and pions – and the British they actually seem to think are the treat –but what hap- doing math in the parking lot. Commonwealth still encom- McDonalds is proper food pens if you opt for ‘trick’? and that Starbucks make Does one of the midgets’ passed half the planet. masks comes off and reveal But, slowly but surely, the decent coffee. Email your comWe’ve already seen it with Paul Daniels? Horror of meticulous grammar that ments to donna@ people like myself were Halloween, which was not horrors! thecourier.es But back to the English taught in school began to be even celebrated in the UK in

YOUR VIEW

TRACKING DOWN BETTY’S SCRAPE-ISTS THE expression ‘hit-and-run’ immediately conjures up horrific images of maniac drivers and mangled bodies. But what about the guy who accidentally backs into a parked vehicle, causing visible damage, and then drives off, hoping that nobody has taken his registration number? That’s hit and run, too. And judging by the state of most cars in my part of Spain, there are an awful lot of people on the roads protecting guilty secrets. Let’s be honest, a three-yearold car without at least one noticeable dent or scrape is about as common as free-flowing traffic on an English motorway. I’ve had Betty, my little Kia Picanto, for four years, during which time she has been in one

proper accident (the other guy’s fault, naturally) and been attacked by two hit and runners. Oh, there was also the occasion last year when a family member nudged another vehicle while she was parking in

Guardamar. Although there was little damage to his car, the owner insisted on going through the insurance because it was a business vehicle. Not clever – my premium has virtually doubled for the next 12

months. All of which makes it all the more galling that the two b******s who deflowered my Betty got away with it, while I face a bill of several hundred euros to get the damage repaired. If I ever get round to it. Meanwhile, I’m driving round with my pride dented, along with a cracked headlamp and two mysterious holes in the top of the front bumper. My hunch is that the damage was caused by a pair of motorised knitting needles on wheels, which then tried to pull the wool over my eyes. For all our frustration at careless drivers who damage our cars and then leg it (that can’t be right), how many of us have not done the same thing ourselves? I nudged a parked car during a three-point turn a few years back and still have a conscience

over it, even though I have no idea if any damage was done. I could have stopped and knocked on the owner’s door but I was frightened what their reaction would be. And I guess fear does come into the equation. It’s a lot easier to go missing than to face the possibility of being attacked by a furious gorilla of a man. Particularly if he is armed with knitting needles.


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The dumb waiter and the March of time… I EMBRACED Mrs S and kissed her farewell 'Darling,' I said. 'I want you to know that however long we are apart, I shall forever treasure our time together.' Mrs S twisted out of my arms. 'Stop embarrassing me!' she hissed. 'I'm only going into the fitting room to try on these five frocks.' 'Yeah,' I sniffed. 'But you'll take hours.' Mrs S glared at me. 'And you can turn that flaming thing off as well.' I switched off Rachmaninoff's Piano Concerto No.2, which I was playing at full volume on my not-state-of-the-art portable music machine. 'They played that tune all the time in Brief Encounter,' I grumbled. 'Now you've shattered the mood of lovers parting.' Mrs S marched into the fitting room and drew the curtain, more to shut me out than to protect her modesty. I surveyed my store surroundings and tried not to take in every detail all at once. 'Pace yourself, David,' I said to myself. 'You're going to be here for the next few years.' I started to count the ceiling tiles to prevent myself becoming fed up. But I got fed up anyway and decided instead to count the number of blue-spotted blouses hanging on the rail. Then I thought I would repeat the challenge but this time while holding my breath. But I feared my lips would turn bluer than the blouses and I would see more spots before my eyes than were actually on the garments. I wondered if I had time to nip up the escalator and grab a quick coffee in the cafe. Better not, I thought. With my luck, Mrs S might emerge with the five frocks and get me to swap them for five other items to try on. If I wasn't around, life would be wretched for me for the rest of the day.

It was at times like these that I missed the intellectual input of my grandchildren. Rewind a couple of weeks and I'm sitting in my kitchen with my grandson, aged six. 'Okay,' I say to him. 'Your turn.' He looks around the room and says: 'I spy with my little eye something beginning with . . . eeee!' 'Eeee!' I echo and jump onto my chair. 'Have you seen a mouse, boy? I hate rodents. They scare me.' 'No, grandpa,' he says, tutting. 'I spy something starting with the letter E.' 'Why didn't you say so,' I mumble, stepping off the chair. I then proceed to list all the items I can spot in the kitchen beginning with E. An electric something? No. An egg slicer? No. An elastic band? No. 'Okay, boy,' I say, patting him on the head 'You win. Here's a chocolate biscuit. So what was it?' My grandson grins in triumph. 'It was an elephant.' I snatch back the biscuit. 'What elephant? There are no pachyderms in this kitchen!' My grandson grabs the biscuit. 'But I spied an elephant at the zoo yesterday.' I put my head in my hands and marvel at the wonders of child logic. My granddaughter, aged

three, runs into the kitchen. 'Where is it, grandpa? she shouts excitedly. 'Not another one,' I groan. 'I told your brother - there's no elephant.' 'Elephant? What elephant?' says my granddaughter, puzzled. 'Where's the mouse?' I tug on my ears and stick out my tongue.

Pulling faces always makes my granddaughter laugh. She stares at me and shakes her head. 'Yeah, yeah, grandpa. Very funny,' she sighs. My granddaughter, I decide, is growing up .Fast forward two weeks to the department store. I am now counting elasticated pink slacks and wondering whether there are exactly the same number of matching tops. What the hell is she doing in there, I wonder, making a rude gesture at the drawn curtain. 'I saw that!' I hear Mrs S shout. And then, just a few feet away, I spot a fellow sufferer. I saunter over to the suffering fellow and smile. He sort of smiles back but looks slightly edgy. He's probably wondering who this nutter is, counting items of women's clothing. I try to put him at ease. 'Been here long?' I ask. 'Since March,' he mutters. 'Brilliant!' I shout and grab him by the shoulders. 'I just love your sense of humour,' I guffaw. 'Let me give you a hug. Since March. That's priceless.' But the man squirms out of my grip and runs away. I can swear he's sobbing. Minutes later, a woman emerges from the fitting rooms. She peers around anxiously and then approaches me. 'Excuse me,' she says. 'But have you seen my cousin? I left him waiting out here. 'I'm concerned,' she explains, 'because he's very shy and extremely nervous with strangers. 'He's from a small village in Spain, you see, and has only been in Britain since March.’

GRANNY’S MOTHBALLS GOT ME JAILED Continued from Page 6

tions that happen on TV and you just can't believe it. Seeing myself suddenly in a cell, surrounded by criminals who all looked like bullies. "I was sure no one had touched my suitcase because everything was the way I packed it and I knew that there couldn't be any drugs. ‘’But then suddenly everything turned blue as if there were. "My parents wanted to come and visit me but I told them not to. I was scared that they would have something in their clothes that would also turn out positive and that they would end up like me. "I didn't understand anything. In jail, I maintained I was innocent but

everyone laughed at me, political prisoners and employees. They told me: 'Yeah, yeah, here in jail no one has done anything, obviously.'" His strong religious beliefs helped him but also made it hard to accept what was happening to him. "I give young people talks about not taking drugs, I have a strong religious life. How could I ever do something like that?" The doctor had been coming to Madrid to study, just as he had been saying for the last six months. Some substance that his grandmother used - the detergent, the starch or the mothballs - contained an element that reacted to the spray in the same way

that cocaine does. The judge who ordered his release, Raimunda de Peñafort, wasn't the one who put him in jail. But by that point, Dr Rodríguez had lost the opportunity to do the health course and his scholarship money.

Forced He was forced to tell his boss at the health centre back in Panama, who had only given him three months' leave, that he was in jail in Spain for alleged drug trafficking, and to ask him to extend his time off in order not to lose his job. He also had to tell his friends and family that they had taken him for a drug trafficker. He spent Christmas and

New Year imprisoned in a foreign country and turned 35 in Navalcarnero jail. Dr Rodriguez reflects: "The failure of the drug test isn't the airport guards' fault but what I cannot understand is how the second test report took so long and how the attorneys and judges didn't care about having someone in jail without confirmed proof for so long.’’ His lawyers, Jaime Ingram and José Luis Mazón, have just presented a €280,000 legal claim against the state. Juan Enoc Rodríguez Lizondro is also considering asking for the San Carlos III institute scholarship again.


Friday, September 9, 2011

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Friday, September 9, 2011

Charity puts hope in Faith’s American leg FAITH, the three-legged horse living at Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre in Rojales, has a new false leg - specially designed and made in the USA. The brave little animal, who lost a front leg after an accident, struggled to cope with the prosthetic replacement made in Spain as it kept breaking and rubbed painfully against her stump. As the first horse in Spain to be fitted with a false leg, the technology was very much trial and error, according to Easy Horse Care. Desperate to see Faith comfortable, rescue centre staff commissioned two

Stroke support TORREVIEJA Stroke Support Group (TSSG) meet on Fridays from 2.45pm to 5pm with a mixed programme of theraputic activities, help and assistance for both stroke survivors and carers. Meetings take place in The Annex, Municipal Buildings, Calle Paganini s/n, Urbanization La Siesta, Torrevieja. Call in to meet us, or for further information e-mail: strokesupportgroup@hotmail.com, or visit our website: www.torreviejastrokesupportgroup.com or telephone 96 671 8964.

new legs from America at a cost of €1,500 each. Made by the person who designs and makes the prosthetic limbs for Molly, America’s first three-legged horse, the new legs should allow Faith to move more easily. The first one is rigid, but a second leg, due to arrive in the next two weeks, will allow Faith to bend at the knee. It is hoped she may even trot again. Faith, pictured with volunteers Kate and Solvi Jensen, appears happy with her new leg and is able to once again put weight on the limb. Find out more about Faith at www.easyhorsecare.net

THINK PINK FOR BREAST CANCER AWARENESS

Family pays tribute - with a tribute!

WHEN Russ and Jane of Torrevieja’s Rendezvous Bar decided to celebrate Jane’s late father’s life and to thank Paul Cunningham Nurses for all their help in caring for him, they felt there was only one way to pay tribute – with a marathon musical tribute session. So, on Saturday September 17 the bar will be filled with the sounds of tribute artist Christopher Robin paying homage to the likes of Buddy Holly, Bobby Vee, Billy Fury and Tommy Steele. Russ told The Courier: “Paul Cunningham Nurses were amazing. They were so helpful to Jane and I, as well as caring for Jane’s dad, Tony Rumsey. We both felt we wanted to do something to show our thanks for the help we received from this charity. September 17 is to be a fun time to remember Tony and also to celebrate his life.” The action kicks off at 1pm and goes through to midnight. Between acts the bar is staging auctions, raffles and a tombola, plus a delicious buffet for only €5. All money raised will go to PCN.

By REBECCA MARKS

PINK is definitely this season’s black as fundraisers across the Costas are invited to join the fight against Breast Cancer. ‘Debbie’s Breast Cancer Awareness Walk’ was born eight years ago, after inspiring founder Debbie Weedon overcame a gruelling battle with breast cancer, and vowed to support others faced with the same ordeal. Her campaigning for the AECC cancer charity has become renowned over the years and includes various pantomimes, golf tournaments and the biggest event, a Sponsored Walk, whose signature theme was the wearing of a decorated pink bra to raise public awareness and give a big shout for the cause. Sadly, Debbie has decided to retire from the event, which took a great deal of organisation and time to arrange. However, Zumba instructor Lisa Gordon, who made her debut Zumba demo in Spain at the 2010 event, has bravely taken the reins. It was not possible to organise a walk this year, but don’t be disappointed. That will recommence in 2012 – and as a prelude, ‘Debbie Weedon’s Pretty In Pink’ will be taking the Costa Blanca by storm next month! The fabulous pink festival will be held on the car park of the George Pub in Ciudad Quesada on Sunday October 16, starting at around 13:00 and continuing through the afternoon. A multitude of performers and activities are already confirmed with many more to come, and the entire event will be glued together nicely by cheeky TKO Radio presenter Lee Fox. A supercharged team from Howard’s Gym will kick things off with a sponsored Spin-o-Thon, the fitness theme conti-

nuing with awesome Zumba and Zumbatomic (kids) displays coordinated by Lisa herself, and a Step Aerobics demo courtesy of the girls from OK Gym. The dancing continues with floor displays by the Dance Ranch Line Dancers, Raquel Peña’s Flamenco, and Totally Dance, followed by vocalists Rebecca Holt, Gemma Jones, Lorna Michelle and fabulous Buddy Holly Tribute act, Holly Buddy, who has agreed to dress appropriately for the occasion! Numerous side stalls will be selling goods to help to boost funds, including a cake stall- with plenty of, you guessed it, pink icing on the go, and a raffle with quality prizes gratefully received from a variety of local businesses. Anyone attending (male or female) is invited to wear their own originally decorated bra with pride, and for the entry fee of just two Euros, tor Nigel Hopkins, a professional voice have the opportunity to enter coach with more than 30 years experience the annual ‘Best Bra’ competition. teaching young voices. This will be judged by Teen Opportunities to sing solo are available Celebrity Georgie May, and to any member - and encouragement and the lucky winner will enjoy a good advice will be given accordingly. If you wish your child(ren) to be taught fabulous two-night stay in to sing properly, and partake in concerts in Benidorm! (not a bad ‘Booby’ a professional manner, then Cantemos! is prize, is it?) For further details please the place to be. For further details call 966 call Lisa Gordon on 603 329 775 976 or bring your child along to rehearsal any Saturday (come early - about 058 or to keep up to date with the event’s progress go to 10.15am). ‘Pretty In Pink’ via Facebook.

Let’s sing the proper way with Cantemos! CANTEMOS!’, the Children's Choir which proved such a hit in the recent Andrew Lloyd Webber concert at the Orihuela Costa Resort, and subsequently in San Pedro, is seeking new members to join its growing band of singers. Children of any nationality aged between eight and 16 are invited to come along each Saturday morning to the choir’s rehearsal room in the salon underneath La Zenia Church. Rehearsals start at 10.30am and finish at 12.30pm. Full training will be given by choir direc-

Lisa Gordon gets her Zumba girls in the pink of condition

Paella and chips? You will have to wait till January SHOWGROUP Torrevieja’s workshops were well received and well attended with members of other groups joining in and learning while enjoying themselves. The group started rehearsals for their next production, ‘Paella and Chips’ on Tuesday at La Rustika. All parts have been cast but any potential new members are invited to come along. The show will be staged on January 4, 5 and 6 at La Rustika. For more details, ring Jenny on 966 181 951 or 608 129 983 - or just turn up and join in the fun.


Friday, September 9, 2011

IT’S BIG BAND TIME AGAIN GET ready for a blare treat - because the first of this season's special Big Band Dance Nights is less than a week away. The venue is the atmospheric four-star Hotel Costa Narejos in Los Alcazares, the date September 15 (next

Thursday), the time 9pm11.30pm - and the musicians are Swingtet-Plus Big Band, the 10-piece band with a very big-band sound. The band will be presenting their own adaptations and arrangements from all the popular Big Bands,

with vocal support from the talented Patti Ross. Proceeds of the evening’s raffles will be presented to Help Murcia Mar Menor Cancer Support Group. Tickets are just €6 and are available at the hotel, telephone 968 583 980.

Residents of the ‘Jennifer’ development are fed up waiting for answers

OUTCASTS From Page One

Habitation Certificate Bill was informed of a legal dispute between the building company, Costa Marina Urbana SL and the landowner, as the project had encompassed more land than originally agreed. The Town Hall administration claimed they were unable to release the certificates whilst the case was pending. The argument was finally heard in Elche Court during 2009, and the builder duly paid the agreed sum for the extra land. At this point Bill and Susan returned to the Town Hall assuming that they would now be free to issue the certificates, but were told that they had received no confirmation from the court that the dispute had been settled so were still unable to act. That was two years ago – and they are still waiting despite any number of visits by themselves and the community’s Administrators.

Simple Bill told The Courier: “We constantly go to the Town Hall to enquire and always get fobbed off with the same excuse. ‘’If all that they are waiting for is news that the legal battle is settled, then surely a simple telephone call to the court would set the record straight and get things moving. ‘’In that sense it would appear that there is another underlying agenda”. Bill said there is often confusion as to whose responsibility it is to complete work within the village, as half of it is governed by Rojales and half by Almoradi. Unfortunately his property falls into the latter sector and he has been paying council tax for non-existent services for the past four years. He said residents and visitors have to take their rubbish to bins located within the village – a journey not recommended in the evening when the entire area is in darkness, with the nearest street lights some distance away. “Being in quite a secluded spot among the lemon groves, we are extremely vulnerable to break-ins and have reported several incidents to the Town Hall,’’ Bill added. ‘’Yet still they refuse to listen. ‘’Surely the safety of their citizens and

reducing the crime rate should be a high priority, but even this has not provoked any action. ‘’The building company, Costa Marina Urbana also went into liquidation in June of this year, so we cannot even go to them for advice and are at a loss as to what to do from here. “With no reasonable explanation being offered for their lack of cooperation, I can only assume that the Town Hall is withholding the Habitation Certificates due to their own lack of resources. But as I pay my taxes the same as everyone else, that really isn’t my problem”. The management of the Administrator, Almoradí Communities, confirmed they are in discussions with the Town Hall with regard to the Habitation Certificates, but said the administration cannot legally grant them until they have resolved various issues with the building contractors concerned.

Checked They explained that Valencian Law, now also governed by European Legislation, states that when a construction project reaches completion, the builder must apply for an inspection from the appropriate Town Hall, whose Inspector assesses whether the work has been completed in accordance with planning permission granted and that the properties are fit to live in. Also checked are the construction of proper pavements, access roads, water and electric outlets and an adequate drainage/ sewage system. If all of these factors are deemed satisfactory, the Habitation Certificates may be issued. The Administrators insisted they are doing everything within their power to obtain the legal paper work, but maintained that, essentially, it is an issue for the promoter and Town Hall to address. They also emphasised that the reason for the delay in releasing the certificates is complex but valid, and that there is no underlying agenda on the part of the Town Hall. I contacted Almoradi Town Hall for an official statement , but had not received a response at the time of going to press.

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Friday, September 9, 2011

WONDERFUL WATER WITHOUT WORRIES!

POURING a glass of cold drinking water from the tap was something that we all took for granted before we moved to Spain. Now buying and lugging huge flagons of water home is part of everyday life. Experts recommend we should drink around two litres of water every day – unfortunately coffee, wine and beer do not count as they have a diuretic effect on the body. Caffeine and alcohol both squeeze water from the cells so that you loose more fluid than you take on board. If you wait until you are thirsty before you reach for a glass of H2O, then you are already dehydrated and the damage is done. When the body is dehydrated it often sends out signals that are misread as hunger pangs. Mild dehydration actually slows down the metabolism, so you are actually missing out two-fold if you let your water intake slip. In addition, a little dehydration can leave you feeling tired as well as affecting your short term memory. You will have noticed the smell of chlorine in the tap water here in Spain. Chlorine introduced into the water supply reacts with other naturally-occurring elements to form toxins called trihalomethanes (THMs), which eventually make their way into our bodies. THMs have been linked to a wide range of human health maladies ranging from asthma and eczema to bladder cancer and heart disease. In addition, there are several studies linking moderate to heavy consumption of chlorinated tap water by pregnant women with higher miscarriage and birth defect rates. The Water Filter Co. offer a friendly, quality service, supplying and installing the best

in-line water filter systems available. We do not subscribe to the one-system-suits-all approach, we will advise you on the most suitable system for your needs, from our Compact Dual Filter System, our Deluxe System or a Five Filter Reverse Osmosis Systems.

Questions and Answers Why do I need to filter my water? The answer to this question varies depending on which area you live. In some areas it would be very dangerous to drink the tap

water, whilst in others the high chlorine content not only makes the water unpleasant to drink but could cause long-term health problems. Why should I choose The Water Filter Co? We offer an unbeatable level of service, we assess individual customer requirements and then provide a tailor-made solution, we do not subscribe to the “same system fits all” offered by some companies. How much does water filter system cost? Prices start from 95€ for our compact dual

Thriller at La Zenia

THE people of Costa Blanca were wowed and amazed by the Thriller 'KIng Of Pop' stage performance which took place on Sunday in the concert suite at the four-star La Zenia Hotel. In another successful show organised by Ticketplanner Eu Events, Adrian Navadina the world’s No.1 tribute to Michael Jackson and the Thriller dance team had everyone rocking in their seats to all the

hits we know and love. The crowd were amazed by the similarities of the tribute to Michael himself and had a chance to have a photo after the show with their idol. A great night and a great concert. TICKETPLANNER™ The best seats at the best shows - now in Spain. Book tickets the easy way with ETicket. Pre-book by email and pay later! Just so easy and affordable.

Send us your show request and number of tickets and we will reserve seats and send confirmation back to your email. Print off, bring with you and pay at the on-site Ticketplanner office on the day of the event. If the show is good it will have TICKETPLANNER™ on it! Email for tickets now on tickets@ticketplanner.es Picture: Ken Taylor photography

filter system ranging up to 199€ for a Reverse Osmosis system, including fitting. How much does a filter change cost? Filter changes for our compact dual system cost 30€ and a standard filter change for a Reverse Osmosis system is 39€ I have a system fitted by another company, can you still change my filters for me? Yes, in many cases we can change your existing filters with the same type, if this is not possible we will upgrade your current system from as little as 30€ Other companies charge a lot more, why are you so cheap? We do not consider our prices cheap, they are reasonable. I am sure that many of us have noticed how prices tend to be inflated for expats. Our price reflects a fair Spanish price, also all our equipment is sourced here in Spain. We have negotiated special rates with our suppliers and have passed these savings to our customers, we do not pay expensive shipping costs for filters from other countries not designed for use here in Spain. We have known people charged 85€ for a filter change when the filters are available for only 15€ on the internet, we do not consider this fair or reasonable.

Worried about water? Speak to the specialists For further information please do not hesitate to contact us. Office : 966 189 005 Mobile : 635 416 255


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Friday, September 9, 2011

BROWN FORCE Why Gordon was not everyone’s Darling

PLEASE spare a moment of your precious time to remember the former PM, Gordon Brown. I just wonder what the melancholy Scotsman is up to these days? Is he is still ringing his old mate Bono trying to solve the problems of Third World debt? Or perhaps he’s trying to fix up a lucrative American lecture tour to show how he still has his fingers on the economic pulse of the world? I wonder if he sent his Sunday morning cup of tea splattering onto his wife Sarah if he watched last weekend’s Andrew Marr Show on BBC1! More on that in a moment. Sightings of Brown have been as rare as those of a Dodo, but he managed in July to re-surface like a ruffled lizard in the House of Commons, when he put in a rare appearance to give the Murdoch empire a good kicking. At least he had the guts to admit that he should have done more about their dirty practices when he was in power, but it’s easy to say things like that when he knows that he has no responsibility to worry about, and can swiftly sneak off to catch the nightsleeper to Edinburgh from Kings Cross. Brown would hardly be an automatic choice for a companion if you were stuck on a desert island looking for a fun time to cheer yourself up. In fact, despite emphatic denials before the last election, we are hearing more about what a pretty nasty piece of work he was. Remember, he knifed Tony Blair more than any Tory politician managed to do, and then was anointed as Labour leader and Prime

Minister without a single vote being cast by party members, let alone the British electorate. That’s democracy for you! But it was Brown’s voluble temper and difficulty with social skills that had become legendary, yet always denied by his fawning inner circle. Enter ex-Chancellor Alistair Darling in a marvellous turnabout that a circus acrobat would be very proud of. Before the last General Election, journalist Andrew Rawnsley wrote a detailed account about Brown’s methods of running an administration amidst accusations of staff being bullied at Downing Street. A parade of Labour goons were frogmarched in front of every working microphone to rubbish what Rawnsley had written, and to say what a lovely man Gordon was. One of those people under orders to smile and prevaricate in front of the TV cameras was Darling, who looked as if he was suffering from piles as he had to defend his leader in a Sunday morning TV interview with Andrew Marr. It was well known at the time that Brown didn’t get on with Darling, and that he wanted his personal poodle, Ed Balls, to become Chancellor. To give Darling credit, he didn’t budge and Brown knew the pre-election stench of a Cabinet split would add still further to his woes, so he backed off. The damage was done, though, but Darling had to pay him back by doing a merry dance in front of the cameras. I actually felt sorry for him, as he was clearly singing from a hymn-sheet prepared by that arch-spinner of

Amazon all set to launch Spanish web next week

Online retail giant to roll out all products by end of year Spaniards have waited for 16 years, but it is finally here. Amazon.es will be up and running on September 15, a day after its presentation by Greg Greeley, vice-president of the online seller's European division, sources in the know said. For now, users of the Spanish portal will only be able to purchase physical items such as books, music and movies. The online giant has been buying stock

from Spanish bookstores for a year to offer on its website. By the end of the year, Amazon hopes to have rolled out its entire selection of products, including its proprietary e-reader Kindle and its virtual book catalog. The popular sales portal was created in 1995 by Jeff Bezos out of Seattle, and it has since then become the largest online bookseller.

disinformation, Alistair Campbell. Fast forward 19 months - and guess what? Darling has written a book about his recent political experiences called ‘Back From The Brink’ where he slags off Brown and his temper, and tells of his shouting matches with his fellow Scotsman. All a bit of a different tale, isn’t it, since there are no ballot boxes to be seen? And in an ironic twist, the man whose eyebrows remind me of Sam the American Eagle on The Muppet Show, even popped up on Marr’s TV show last Sunday to give us his forthright views. What a shame, then, that book revenues count for a lot more than a politician being prepared to stand up and be counted on a matter of principle. Nothing new there! But it’s not all bad for Gordon Brown, because I firmly believe he should be honoured by every man, woman and child in the United Kingdom. In case you feel I’m suffering from some late summer sunstroke, let me explain my rationale. Just go back to 1997 and Brown’s stubborn refusal to listen to his master Tony Blair over the Euro. Blair wanted to drag the country, kicking and screaming, into the single currency on the back of his landslide election victory,

but Brown was as immovable as a Guardia Civil traffic checkpoint on what he saw as a crucial matter. Of course it was really about him losing control, but he also did see future problems with the new Euro currency. A load of compromising guff was concocted to spare Blair’s blushes, along the convoluted lines that Britain’s economy was not converging in a similar pattern to other countries in the European Union, and so could not join the Euro. Nobody has successfully explained to me what that meant, and there didn’t seem to be any problems of convergence for corrupt economies like those of Greece to join in the party. And look at what happened! Whatever some of his failings were, Brown’s pivotal role in keeping Britain out of this economic farce/tragedy will be viewed very positively by future historians. But I’ll guess that he won’t be scrawling any greetings on a Christmas card to the Darling household this year. Finally, I’m having my own Parliamentary recess for the next fortnight, amidst paintpots and an autumn patio cleaning session. I’ll be getting some more salt ready to pinch on your behalf come the end of September.

From Spain to infinity for balloon space tourists IF you are afraid of heights, read no further. A Spanish company has developed a helium balloon that will take brave passengers on the trip of a lifetime into the Earth’s stratosphere. The ‘Bloon’ – set to launch in two years – will climb to a dizzying 22 miles above the planet, with the balloons four space tourists and two pilots travelling inside a pressurised 13ft pod. The experience, offered by Spanish

firm Zero 2 Infinity, will last five hours and cost a whopping 100,000 euros. Included in the price is the chance to see the sun dawning over the planet as the

curvature of the Earth is revealed. The project was conceived by Barcelona-based Spanish entrepreneur Jose Mariano Lopez-Urdiales, who has so far conducted five test flights after coming up with the idea 10 years ago. “People will enjoy it because being that high reminds them that they come from a planet, and are part of something much bigger,” he said.


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Friday, September 9, 2011

FROM THE PRESS:

Drama as Borat Smugglers’ film blocks demo SOS is so arresting

ANTI-BUDGET cut protestors clashed in Seville’s Plaza de España last week, but it was not the police or political opponents that became the objects of their anger. The demonstrators were furious at having their right to political protest blocked by, wait for it...Borat and Ali G actor, Sacha Baron Cohen. In a scene that could have been lifted straight from one of Baron Cohen’s comic films, the protestors, led by United Left (IU) Andalusia coordinator Diego Valderas, marched straight into another group of demonstrators, who stopped the IU protestors from handing their petition to the Andalusian government delegation. The second group, some 400 anti-dictator revolutionaries, were busy pulling down an invisible statue of Baron Cohen (to be digitally added later) in a scene from his latest movie, which was being filmed in the square.

SEVILLE GUARD: Sacha Baron Cohen confused the protestors In the film, Finchley Dreams, Baron Cohen plays a Gaddafi-style dictator of a fictional country. The line between film and reality became blurred – despite the comedian’s seriously dodgy stick-on beard – when the fake dictator’s presence meant IU protestors were barred from accessing a government building to exercise their democratic right to

KING’S ACHILLES HEALING NICELY A PALACE statement confirmed on Monday that the 73-year-old Spanish monarch had the procedure under local anaesthetic on Sunday and that it went well. The king is now back at Zarzuela Palace where he is thought to be starting a longterm rehabilitation programme. The surgery is the king’s third operation in two years. He had a benign lung tumour removed in 2010, and in June this year had surgery to insert titanium implants into his left knee, which led to much speculation about the state of his health.

protest. IU leaders and film security staff clashed, and Valderas roused the crowd, as tanks and armoured cars rolled in to put down the protest. But which one? The confusion was ended when police – real ones this time – intervened and the IU protestors were allowed through. As if the scene of IU lea-

ders waving placards alongside mounted police and an army tank wasn’t surreal enough, a short while later Seville’s mayor, Juan Ignacio Zoido of the Popular Party, arrived to meet Baron Cohen, dressed in full fake dictator regalia, and director Larry Charles. Let’s just hope Valderas doesn’t make it to the final cut.

IN sheer desperation after being stranded at sea, a group of drug smugglers called the coastguards for help. The three men on board escaped with their lives but not their freedom as police seized the 1.1 tons of hashish they were transporting. A police spokesman said their boat started to drift when its motor stopped working some 20 nautical miles off the Murcia coast, and added: "At this moment the three drug traffickers who were on board called the coast guard and they were towed to the port of Cartagena.’’ The three were arrested along with two accomplices who were waiting in a vehicle to transport the drugs. Another three people were later arrested because of suspected links to the smuggling operation - two in Alicante and one in Cartagena. Police said the boat with the drugs was already under surveillance before the smugglers called for help. Spain's proximity to north Africa, a key source of hashish, and its close ties with its former colonies in Latin America, a major cocaine producing region, have made it a major gateway into Europe for drug traffickers. THE defence team for Francisco Camps, former PP President of the Valencia regional government, is trying to postpone the corruption court case against him until after the General Election on November 22. Defence lawyers are thought to be writing to the judge calling for some of the evidence to be declared null and void. They are challenging phone tap recordings in which Camps describes one of the businessmen at the centre of the alleged corruption as ‘a soulmate’.

l

PRISON IS FINE FOR That’s heavy SORRY ARSONIST

A 43-YEAR-OLD Spaniard set two cashpoints alight in Alicante last week - because he wanted to be sent to prison. After starting the fires he handed himself in to the nearest police station and confessed his crime. He also told the officers that the 15 euros in his pocket was all he had in the world. The down-on-his-luck arsonist explained that he was unemployed and had nowhere to sleep. He said he was feeling so desperate that this had led to his crime. After confessing the reasons for his actions he was allowed to walk away…and now faces a fine!

sh**, man!

A SPANISH couple were arrested in Schiphol, Amsterdam, last Saturday after ten balls of liquid cocaine were discovered in their baby’s nappy. The 18-month-old toddler was searched when officers at the airport noticed the family’s strange behaviour. The drug had a street value of more than 5,000 euros. It is believed the family had travelled from the island of Aruba, in Dutch Antilles.


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Friday, September 9, 2011

HOME AND AWAY

Daily Mail

TODDLER DROWNS IN LAKE TRAGEDY A 19-month-old toddler has died after falling into a lake at a caravan site in Ingoldmells, Skegness, while his parents pitched a tent at the start of a family holiday. The tragedy is understood to have happened after the youngster wandered away from his mother and father at Skegness Water Leisure Park on Saturday. Police spokesman Dick Holmes said: 'We are treating this as a tragic accident and our thoughts are very much with the family of the little boy. 'His parents were distracted for just a few moments and he was only gone for a minute. They found him very quickly, but by then it was too late. 'It's a warning to people that these things take just seconds. While in this instance it's a lake in a park, all too often it's a garden pond in someone's home or their nextdoor neighbour's.’’

£1M WOMAN BEATER TO KEEP HIS TV WINNINGS The Sun THE ex-con exposed as a brute who beat up a woman will get to KEEP the £1million he scooped on new television show Red Or Black. Fury at Nathan Hageman's win intensified as an ITV insider said: "Our hands are legally tied." Bungling producers knew Hageman, 31, got five years for ABH — but thought he attacked a fella. They were stunned to learn his ex-lover was the victim. Sickened crusaders against domestic violence last night blasted ITV for making Hageman a millionaire. They demanded the fortune won by the brickie on Ant and Dec's new show is given to charity instead. ITV's embarrassment deepened as it emerged producers still let Hageman on Saturday's show even though they knew he had done time

for assault. They mistakenly assumed his victim had been a man. A spokesman for the show, co-produced by Cowell's firm Syco, admitted: "Whilst producers were aware that Nathan had served a prison sentence for assault, they were not fully aware of facts which have since emerged.

"As a result of this ITV is reviewing the background checks on all remaining contestants in the show." Hageman, of Reading, Berks, got five years for his savage attack on Amy Edwards. He served 2½. The Sun revealed he was also arrested on suspicion of assaulting another woman. Meanwhile, relatives of current girlfriend Jane Makepeace claimed she was treated in hospital for a suspected brain bleed after a violent row with him. A horrified source on Red Or Black said: "We are kicking ourselves. We spoke to him about his crime but it never came up that it was against a woman. "But we've been advised that because he has completed the show and won the cash we will have to pay him. Our hands are tied."

NAPOLEON BONUS PART

Stunned TV experts unlock French Emperor’s hair

EXPERTS have discovered a lock of Napoleon Bonaparte's hair during the new series of the Antiques Road Trip. It was found at the home of Sir Walter Scott in Abbotsford in Melrose, Scotland by Anita Manning, who was examining a blotter book belonging to Napoleon when she discovered the hair and a handwritten note to Scott from a Mr Dalton. In the note, dated 1827, Dalton

Daily Mirror explains that the lock of hair was given to him by Lieutenant Colonel Elphinstone who served under Wellington. He says he thought it would interest Scott because he enjoyed collecting items from across the world. Wendy Rattray, executive producer at STV, which produces the show, said: "We're delighted to kick off the

new series with a truly breathtaking find. Our experts are always on the lookout for hidden treasures as they drive across the UK but never did we imagine we'd find something of such historical importance." The first episode of the Antiques Road Trip goes out on BBC2 next Monday. The episode featuring Abbotsford will be shown on Wednesday September 14.

NAPOLEON: Find

New riot fear as Clarke blasts ‘feral underclass’ ONE in five thugs charged during the recent riots are in gangs and three-quarters have criminal records. Police fear trouble again this weekend with hundreds expected at the funeral of gangster Mark Duggan, whose shooting sparked the unrest. Justice Secretary Ken Clarke (pictured left) blamed a “feral under-

Daily Star class” of yobs for the rioting which swept across Britain. He claimed the justice system was “broken” and called for tough action to tackle reoffending. A whopping 50% of jailed convicts currently end up back in prison. Mr Clarke said: “The riots can be

seen as an outburst of outrageous behaviour by the criminal classes – individuals and families familiar with the justice system who haven’t been changed by their past punishments.” He is to lift a ban on cameras in courts to “improve transparency”. Scotland Yard has drafted in extra officers from as far as Newcastle in case fresh anarchy erupts after the

funeral of dad-of-four Duggan on Friday. The 29-year-old was shot by Met officers in Tottenham last month. A police source said: “There are real fears this could be used as an excuse for those behind the first riots to have another go.” Shadow Justice Secretary Sadiq Khan said Mr Clarke had offered no real solutions to reoffending.


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editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Bag theft is as easy as 1, 2, 3 COULD you please put out a warning about pickpockets and handbag thieves who are operating on the Orihuela Costa and no doubt elsewhere? We have had cases in Chinese Bazaars and similar premises where there is not much space in the aisles and where it is easy for thieves to steal handbags or, if they are not properly fastened and guarded, the contents of those handbags. The same applies to men who carry wallets in shorts or trouser pockets. Thee thefts also occur in street markets

where large crouds congregate. The thieves usually operate in threes or fours, where one steals and then passes on to No.2, who offloads to No.3 and so on. Before the theft is discovered, No.3 is away with the stolen item or items. If the victim challenges No.1 or No.2, the stolen property has gone and both No.1 and No.2 are demanding an apology for false accusation. On the Orihuela Costa we have a very effective Guardia Civil and Policia Local but they cannot be everywhere at the same

time. The help they need from the public is that people take the appropriate measures to protect their property. Also that victims of crime visit the Guardia Civil Cuartel at Torre de la Horadada where a free translator is provided between 9.30am and 2.30pm on weekdays or at the Orihuela Costa Town Hall. Thanks to the Police, crime on the Orihuela Costa is very low - but the help of the public is needed to keep it low. CHRIS POOLE, Vecinos Colaborando, Orihuela Costa

FIV cats: The case for life and death AS a lifelong cat lover, I read Donna Gee’s article about her cats with great interest - particularly the bit about the one that is FIV positive. I was talking to a lady recently who had her cat put to sleep because it was suffering from the feline equivalent of HIV. She said she was told by an animal charity that it was the only option...even though the cat only had an ear infection. And she said the vet she went to agreed. Well, we had a street cat with FIV that we looked after - had him sterilised, got him vaccinated etc.

Happy He couldn't live with us because our male cat wouldn't allow it and we were worried that, despite both having had the chop, they might fight. He was quite happy on the street and loved hanging out in two local bars - one English, one Spanish, where he got food and cuddles. He became quite a local attraction. We would go and sit with him in the evenings, spending hours shivering outside through the winter months while he snuggled warm and purring on our laps. When the vet gave us the diagnosis I thought she would say he had to be put down - but she didn't even mention it, just said it was only the antibodies - like HIV - and that he could live for years and Henry is FIV positive but his owner - The Courier’s Donna Gee - was told the even die just of old age. chances of him spreading the condition is minimal because he’s not a fighter However, the same vet also said in a completely different conversation recentput it down. always putting them down is male cat would get used to once he'd had the chop and ly - (three years later) that If it is a street cat I guess wrong. But all precautions him. he was not a fighter, so I cats with this should be put you need to make a judge- should obviously be taken to But then he went back to don't think he would have down as it is irresponsible to ment. I think these cats stop the spread of the dishang out with the Siamese spread the disease. allow the disease to spread. should always be sterilised - ease. CATWOMAN, Quesada] again - she had been off havIt’s a difficult situation but If to stop them fighting if male Our street cat, lived very ing kittens, we haven't been Much as it interests the cat is a pet, does not and to stop them mating and happily and healthily, hangable to catch her to stop that me personally, the roam and is unlikely to fight (I spreading the disease that ing out at those bars. We yet. subject of feline HIV will understand the disease is way. continued to find him in the undoubtedly have left Hoping spread mainly through saliva I know a lot of people with evenings and feed him and About three weeks ago, he many readers cold. It must from deep bites during fight- different views on this, but I give him cuddles. He was We hope seem as if The Courier is ing), then I don't personally think that given that they can best friends with a little disappeared. someone has given him a being hijacked by cats at think there is any reason to live long and healthy lives, Siamese mix street cat and the two of them would always home, but whatever has hap- present - and as Editor and come running down the road pened to him, he has had a chief moggy scribbler, I am to meet us as soon as they life of at least three years, to blame. My apologies to dog maybe four - and was older FURTHER to Donna Gee’s article on Ryanair (Issue 27), heard our voices. Recently, he took up resi- than most street cats can lovers in particular for we booked with British Airways from Heathrow to Manchester to visit our daughter in Cheshire at a cost of dence under the car outside dream of living, while having barking up a different tree £108. She then asked us to go two days earlier to look our house and in our drive- this disease. So, would it and as for those of you way. He seemed to be grad- have been right to put him who don’t like animals at after the children so she could go to a wedding. To change the flights on line would have cost a total of ually moving himself in, and down - I really don't think so. all...TOUGH! £120.00. BRIAN and ANGIE, Gran Alicant we were hoping our other He obviously didn't mate - DONNA

l

BA’s costly switch

And lock out this serial conman PLEASE could you circulate this warning? The man concerned has been visiting the Costa Blanca for many years. He has again migrated to our area and been knocking on doors in the Villa Martin area asking for money. What he does is not an offence under Spanish law. Activity: He knocks on doors asking for money to pay for a locksmith as he has either lost his house keys or had his house broken into. He says he is living in a house close by and gives his address. The house is unoccupied at this time but is not his.

Locksmith He says he has to pay the locksmith and can´t get enough money from a cash machine to do so. The locksmith will not leave until he is paid in full. Over the years he has asked to borrow 30, 50 and now 40 euros. If you are lucky you may be invited to a party at his house or to go there for a drink. Another story is that he needs to go to the German Embassy in Alicante with his children and asks to borrow the money to get there. He is very plausible in his tale and may change his story. Description: German or Scandinavian, in his 40s, tall with fair hair and previously scruffily dressed. He speaks perfect English and has said he is from Hanover in Germany. Advice: People are warned not to be taken in by this man and not to give him money. CHRIS POOLE, Vecinos Colaborando, Orihuela Costa


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Visit our display at the Indoor British Market/Auction Room at Formentera.


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Friday, September 9, 2011

SCHOOL BOOKS ‘CAN COST 20% LESS IN HYPERMARKETS’ TEXTBOOKS for primary and secondary have been found to be up to 20 per cent cheaper in hypermarkets than in traditional bookshops. And that adds up to a saving of some 40 euros according to the consumers' association OCU. Since 2007, prices are no longer fixed at national level for school books so every shop can set its own price. In order to carry out the study, OCU took the books for fourth year primary and first year secondary as its reference, comparing prices in local bookshops with those in three hypermarkets Alcampo, Carrefour and El Corte Inglés/Hipercor -

where books have to be preordered and prices are not provided in advance. Overall, prices in the hypermarkets were lower than in the bookshops, even

taking into account the additional 10% discount some of the independent stores offered, according to OCU's data. The books for fourth year primary were on average 20% dearer in the bookshops than the hypermarkets, equating to a difference of approximately 23€.. Alcampo was the cheapest at 110.80 euros, compared with 116.30 in Carrefour, 118.10 in El Corte Inglés and 138.20 on average in the independent bookshops. There was a 19% difference in the price of the books for first year secondary, equating to a saving of 40 euros when buying them in the supermarkets. Nevertheless, OCU pointed out that books have to be ordered "blind" in the hypermarkets buyers don't see the price until the book arrives. Orders were also found to be difficult to track and often incomplete, meaning more than one trip to the hypermarket to collect them.


Friday, September 9, 2011

OATY BREAKFASTS EATING oats for breakfast is one of the best ways to start your day. Try these gorgeous breakfast recipes for an oaty fix that will keep you going 'til lunch.

Apple bircher muesli This recipe for apple bircher muesli, made with apples, banana and honey, is the perfect pick-me-up in the morning.

Ingredients 300g porridge oats 400ml apple juice 200ml natural yogurt Sliced banana, dried apricots and toasted coconut flakes, to serve Runny honey, to drizzle

Method

Simple and satisfying, oats are one of the finest breakfast ingredients you can find. Add some crunch to your bowl with home-made granola, keep it simple with museli or enjoy the comfort factor of a warm bowl of porridge. Dress your oats up with seasonal fruits, honey or a wicked swirl of syrup to tailor them to your taste. And since oats are a great source of slow-release energy, these breakfast recipes will keep you satisfied til lunchtime.

Porridge WHAT better start to the day than a bowl of steaming porridge packed with super-nutritious oats? Try raisins, sultanas, prunes or apricots with natural yogurt and honey. Or go for a drizzle of golden syrup.

Ingredients 100g porridge oats 500-600ml water (or milk and water) Sugar or syrup, to taste

Method 1. Place the oats and water in a pan over a medium-low heat, adding a pinch of salt, if you wish. Cook, stirring frequently, for 7-10 minutes until the oats are cooked. The mixture should be creamy and thick. 2. Spoon into warm bowls and sweeten with sugar or syrup if you like, and maybe a dash of cream or milk. Serve with fresh fruit, if you like.

1. Put the porridge oats in a large bowl and pour over the apple juice. Soak overnight in the fridge. 2. The next morning, stir in the yogurt and spoon into bowls. Top with fruit and coconut, and drizzle with honey. Serve cold or warm in the microwave.

Chewy seedy oat and apricot bars

THESE bars are great for the children's lunchboxes – and your coffee break.

Ingredients 300g porridge oats 100g pumpkin or sunflower seeds, or a mixture of the 2 50g desiccated coconut 50g plain flour 200g butter 200g golden syrup 150g soft brown sugar 150g dried apricots, chopped 125g crunchy peanut butter 1 tsp vanilla extract

Method 1. Preheat the oven to 160°C/fan 140°C/gas 3. Line an 18cm x 28cm Swiss roll tin with non-stick baking paper, leaving a little hanging over the edges for easy removal later. 2. Place the oats, seeds, coconut and flour in a large bowl and mix together. Melt the butter with the golden syrup in a saucepan, then mix in the sugar, chopped apricots, peanut butter and vanilla extract. Pour into the dry ingredients and mix until combined. 3. Press into the tin and bake for 20-25 minutes or until golden and slightly firm. Cool in the tin, then lift out on the paper and cut into 18 bars.

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RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain four years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

FIXED: Peter was having some issues with Skype running Paul wanted help with moving his PC away from his wireslowly. less router.

Hi Richard, yet another Skype query, you must get bored with them. My query is: Skype keeps telling me that my computer is running slowly and suggests shutting down other running programs, but to the best of my knowledge, and some of your previous advice in the local press, ie use Ccleaner to turn off programs that start on startup, nothing extra is running. I have a laptop, Packard Bell dot s with 1GB ram using a Intel Atom N455 processor. I can only get the 'yellow' speed bar on SKYPE here in Spain but on the same unit in the UK I always had 'green' My ADSL speed is: download; 2183 & upload; 432. What am I doing wrong??

Q

Hi Peter, thanks for taking the time to email me, this is an interesting one, I don’t think that you are doing anything wrong. I suspect that you are using the latest version of Skype? I can also see that you are probably running a "net book" or some other low powered machine as you mention that you have an Intel Atom processor; these are great processors for "ultra-portable" computers as they take very little power (battery power) and therefore they tend to last quite a long time. One of the down sides however is that they also are very low in processing power and I think this is what is happening in your case. Basically the latest version of Skype requires more processing power than your machine is happy to let it have and you are therefore getting the message from Skype. I have seen this a few times before on slower processor machines. What I would recommend doing is to remove Skype in its entirety and replacing it with an earlier version (one that is less 'processor hungry'). You can find all of the different versions of Skype at http://www.filehippo.com/download_skype - I would suggest you start with version 4.2.0.187 and see if that helps things. Update: Hi again, just to let you know that I took your advice and went back to an older version of Skype 4.0.0.227. Works much better, thank you.

A

FIXED: Dudley wanted to know how to take a copy of a website.

Q A

Hi Richard, I would like to send a webpage as an attachment to a Gmail is this possible, please?

Hi Dudley, if you really want to take a copy of the web page and send it as an email attachment then you will need to print it electronically, to do this you could download a program called CutePDF and use this to make a .pdf copy of the website and then attach the copy to your email. However most people find that simply sending the website address is sufficient given that the person receiving the email would have to have the Internet in order to receive the email and therefore it stands to reason that they could simply navigate to the same website as you?

Q A

I am moving my office about and the new position of my computer means that it is quite a way away from my router. I don’t really want to trail a 10 metre cable around the office so I was thinking of installing a Bluetooth device. Is Bluetooth that reliable or is it better to Hard wire my computer and put up with the messy cable?

Hi Paul, thanks for the question, in fact the answer is that it’s a wireless dongle that you need, not a Bluetooth device and yes it will be fine as, from your description it’s going to be very close to the router. Of course, it’s ALWAYS better use a cable as there is no doubt of interference, but it’s not necessary, you just need a wireless dongle (or a wireless network interface card as you have a PC) and it will do the trick.

Peter was having problems with Skype automatically updating when he started his computer.

Q A

Hi Richard, Can I stop the auto updates from Skype??

Hi Peter, yes you certainly can, just launch Skype, then click Tools, Options, Advanced, and change the setting from ‘automatic’ to ‘notify me’ this way you will simply be notified of a new version and you can then ignore the notification.

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200


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THE DOOR TO BEAUTY SLEEP

NO matter how much we try to resist it, sleep is an important part of life. But with lives that are full of stress, thoughts and demands of our time and attention, it can be hard to get that beauty sleep we so desperately need. If you find yourself awake and reading this at 4am on a Tuesday morning, you have come to the right place to initiate the changes to your sleep behaviour and patterns that have been interfering with your beauty sleep.

MAKE A SCHEDULE The best thing that you can do for yourself is to set up a schedule for yourself, and to stick with it. This means that the schedule you keep during the week days should be kept during the weekend, especially if you are having difficulties sleeping. So if your “bed time” on weekdays is around 10 or 10:30pm, this should be maintained throughout the weekend. If you happen to fall asleep at 10pm on the weekend, it can be presumed that you will wake up around 6 or 7am. Now if you decided to have a wild night out on the weekend and stay up until 1 or 2am, chances are you will sleep in until 11am or noon. This will significant-

ly interfere with your week-day sleep pattern and may cause insomnia and restless nights.

DON’T EAT BEFORE BED One of the worst things you can do for yourself is eating before bed. If you have a full tummy before you go to bed at night, then your inner body will be awake and working at processing and digesting that food. This often is enough to keep even the heaviest and easiest of sleepers awake. As a rule, do not eat for 3 hours prior to hitting the bed so as to not interrupt your sleep with the noises and sensations of digestion.

LOOK AT WHAT YOU’RE EATING

If you do find that you are suddenly

having issues sleeping, take a look at your diet. Are you consuming more caffeinated beverages, such as coffees, teas and sodas than you were previously? Are you eating foods that are loaded in sugars or carbohydrates that are making your blood sugar yo-yo? If you do happen to feel hungry before bed, it is recommended that you try to stick to foods that have a high level of “tryptophan”. Milk, yogurt, ice cream, tuna, soy beans and peanuts all have this nutrient which helps our body produce serotonin, a hormone that helps us relax and feel sleepy.

GET COMFORTABLE

While we're not going to extremes with this article, we can show you how to use simple makeup tricks to achieve fuller lips. You will need: * A nude lip pencil

DO you believe you have a good or bad memory? You may have convinced yourself that your memory is bad, that you are no good with names, that you keep misplacing your keys or your wallet, or that you cannot even remember the names of your friends anymore, and so you believe you have a poor memory, or you are losing you memory. This is especially true if you are an older adult, more so if you are surrounded by negative stereotypes about the aging process that are so common, and tend to portray older people as individuals with evident declining memories and intelligence. Nothing can be further from the truth. What is true though, is that your self confidence and esteem plays a very important role in how efficiently your memory performs. This is a fact well documented by scientific studies. Having the self confidence and belief that you have a good memory, and can store, retain, and recall information and experiences is the first step in boosting your memory. Your memory in a way can be compared to your muscles, with use they become better and more powerful and of course with disuse they become weaker. Just as every athlete understands the importance of exercise, good nutrition and sleep, your memory needs these factors for optimal performance. It is not just enough to believe you have a good memory, as important as that may be, and so just as the self con-

All too many of us try to sleep uncomfortably each night. If this is you, start experimenting with different positions to try to go to sleep. You don’t want to use a flat pillow as this will cause your head to tilt down towards the mattress. You also don’t want your head to be propped at an angle either. Choose pillows that will keep your head level to the mattress but not dipping towards or away from it either. If you experience lower body pain, place a pillow between your knees. This has become such an issue that specific pillows have been manufactured for this purpose alone.

WANT LUSCIOUS LIPS?

Angelina Jolie is genetically blessed with luscious, fuller lips. Today, Hollywood's elite have hired numerous plastic surgeons and spent fortunes on collagen filler, in order to achieve the fuller-look effect.

BRAIN TRAINING FOR IMPROVED MEMORY

* Lip brush * Lip-gloss * Concealer Step 1 After applying foundation to your face, line the outer lips with concealer, going over your natural lip line. Using your finger or an ear bud, blend the concealer into your lips. Make sure you apply the concealer in the

shape of your natural lips. Step 2 Using the nude lip liner pencil, draw a lip line that is just above your natural lip line. Fill in the liner over your natural lip line, creating a solid border. Step 3 Using your fingers or ear buds, blend the lip liner over your entire lip, filling in any gaps. Step 4 Using your clear lip-gloss, apply a little to the lip brush and apply to both lips. You're done.

fidence of the professional athlete is boosted by the time spent training for the event; it is now possible to train your brain for the purpose of improving memory and attention. Your brain generates four main brain waves: delta, theta, alpha and beta. Beta waves are high frequency waves generated when you are in a focused analytical thinking state. Alpha waves are associated with a relaxed learning state, while theta wave activity is associated with creativity and day dreaming, but also with distractibility, inattention and emotional problems. It is the dominant wave form of children with attention problems such as ADHD. Delta brain waves are primarily related to sleep, and make up only 5% of activity in adults. Scientific studies have confirmed that aging is accompanied by a decrease in blood flowing to the brain, slowing down alpha brain waves, and increasing theta wave activity. These changes lead to mental decline- memory problems, language and speech difficulties as well as problems with locomotion. With audio-visual entrainment (AVE) devices, it is possible to not only improve memory, but to reverse mental decline, improve mood and reduce falling especially in seniors. AVE devices utilise finely tuned lights and deep sounds set to brain wave frequency to promote stress reduction, improve memory and enhance sleep quality. Mindspa is one such device. It is a programmable device offering 18 built-in brainwave training programs scientifically proven to improve memory, mental sharpness and more. Dr Machi Mannu is a Neuro-repatterning Specialist. For queries, send your email to contact@mindspa.es


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A Stig in the tale of Clarkson’s satnav TOMTOM is to produce an exclusive Top Gear Edition satnav featuring the voice of Jeremy Clarkson. The new Top Gear branded unit will go on sale on October 4, and alongside Clarkson’s typically acerbic route direction (a TomTom spokesman described his tones as ‘dulcet’ but we’re not so sure), the device will also feature The Stig. Since The Stig doesn’t speak we’re not entirely sure how this is going to work – and TomTom isn’t saying yet, either – but perhaps he quietly points you in the direction of abandoned airfields or car parks, and teaches you (via diagram?) how to perform a handbrake turn. Or something. Speaking to the Sunday Times, Clarkson said his role, which he takes to improve an in-car aid he has repeatedly criticised on television and in print, is “mostly about the tone of voice I use.” Uh-oh. “There’s a tone of voice I use when ordering people to do things, so ‘I said left, left, I said left’, you know, that kind of thing, It’s not a gentle satnav voice, put it like that.” We’re promised more details before the

RESURRECTED!

end of the month. Existing TomTom owners needn’t, er, worry, either, as Clarkson’s instructions will be made available as a download from the TomTom website – where you can already acquire assistance from the likes of Homer Simpson, Brian Blessed and Darth Vader. To name but few.

A FIAT made in 1904, buried in 1932, exhumed in 1942 then finally restored in 2007 will take part in a historic rally from London to Brighton. The Fiat 24/32 was bought in Italy in 1904 by a wealthy American lady, Mrs George Agassiz, while she was on honeymoon. She had it shipped to her Cape Cod estate and used it as her runabout for 28 years. In 1932 Mrs Agassiz decided to sell, but couldn't find a buyer. So, instead of having it scrapped (and trading it in for a small Hyundai, perhaps), she buried it in the grounds of her estate. It lay there until, ten years later, Ted Robertson of the US Vintage Sports Car Club asked for permission to exhume it. When he did, he found it had been almost perfectly preserved. It was buried upside

down with the wheels removed and rested on top of the undercarriage. Ted bought it for $50. The car changed hands a few times before ending up with an owner in Milwaukee, with whom it remained for four decades, soil still clinging to the bodywork. Finally, during the early 1990s, restoration began. The Fiat wasn't completed until 2007, when it was sold to a collector in the Netherlands. It is he, Jan Bruijn, who is entering the car into the Veteran Car Run, a classic cavalcade that will see 550 historic cars drive from London to Brighton. An estimated 500,000 are expected to watch the event, which starts on November 6. Only cars built before 1905 can participate.


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World's most costly number plates THERE used to be a time when a private plate really meant you were doing OK for yourself. Now, though, they're so cheap that they're rarely a status symbol. Apart from these beauties that is. We'll start with the UK's five top plates, then move onto the world's list all of which dwarf our humble registration record breakers, and, interestingly, were all bought in the same country: Abu Dhabi.

IN THE UK 5 Plate: VIP 1 Price: £285,000 Buyer: Roman Abramovich When: 2006 The UK's most famous Russian oil oligarch, whose net worth is an estimated £8.4bn, bought VIP 1 as a nice little boost to his selfesteem. Abramovich was

planning on putting the plate on his prized pre-facelift second generation green Fiat Punto, but he decided on his Rolls-Royce Corniche IV instead. 4 Plate: M1 Price: £331,500 Buyer: Mike McCoomb When: 2006 After Mike McCoomb sold his mobile phone company to BT for around £40m, a number plate seemed a nice way to parade his new wealth. We're not sure what plate he bought for himself though, because this one was for his ten-year-old son. Apparently the boy was furious - he'd specifically asked for a Play-Doh Barber Shop. 3 Plate: 1D Price: £352,411 Buyer: Nabil Bishara When: 2009 Lebanese property developer Nabil Bishara paid this

staggering price at an auction in Warwickshire, in March 2009. He bought it for his wife's Bentley as a surprise present. 2 Plate: S1 Price: £404,063 Buyer: Anonymous When: 2008 September 2008 saw the purchase of Edinburgh's first registered number plate, at a Bonhams auction in Chichester. The bidder said, perhaps sarcastically, that the plate would be registered to “an old red Skoda.” 1 Plate: F1 Price: £440,625 Buyer: Afzal Kahn When: 2008

Afzal Kahn, owner of car styling company Project Kahn, is officially the owner of the UK's most expensive plate. He first put it on his Mercedes-McLaren SLR, though we recently saw it on Mr Khan's white Bugatti Veyron parked in his Bradford showroom.

REST OF WORLD 5 Plate: 7 Price: £1.58m The world records are all held by single-digit plates bought at a series of auctions in Abu Dhabi, starting in May 2007, with the proceeds going to various charities including to a rehabilitation centre for traffic acci-

dent victims. Who'd have believed that a £1.58 million plate could be only fifth on the list? 4 Plate: 9 Price: £1.72m This is the fifth single digit number plate to sell in Abu Dhabi. The May 2008 auction that it was part of saw 100 plates sold in front of 450 bidders. In total, 52 million UAE dirhams was raised for charity - around £9m. 3 Plate: 7 Price: £3m A YouTube video shows plate number 7 fetching its

staggering price. They don't do things by half over in Abu Dhabi, selling the plate from a huge stage complete with an Enzo Ferrari, a Mercedes-Benz G Wagen and a Maybach. 2 Plate: 5 Price: £3.4m Nobody thought that the ludicrous £3.4m paid by Emirati stockbroker Talal Khouri for number 5 would be broken - he said the number meant nothing to him until the February 2008 auction of number 1. 1 Plate: 1 Price: £7.1m “I bought it because it's the best number,” said Saeed Khouri after he paid £7.1m for the number 1. One of 90 plates sold in its auction, the event raised a total of £14.7m for charity.


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Strictly for the girls… RIGHT, ladies, get ready because this week my write-up is just for you! I now have all the lowdown on those gorgeous, sexy hunks of man flesh, the Adonis Boys, who are going to be shaking their stuff live on the Costa Blanca later this month. You can get up close and personal with the boys at the Emerald Isle in La Florida on Friday September 30, and it promises to be a real sizzler of a night. The Adonis Boys Cabaret show was created in 1996 in Austria, and was the first really fun male strip show. The aim was to entertain, take nothing seriously and give the audiences a truly enjoyable night out - so none of that posing and ego massaging loved by some male strippers.

The show has been touring for more than 16 years, but don’t worry, it’s not the original cast getting their kit off well past their sell-by date, new boys join all the time. In fact, they recruit the very best male strippers from all over the world. So popular are the boys that they have made numerous appearances on TV, with guest slots on EastEnders, Big Brother, So Graham Norton and Footballers’ Wives. Two of the Adonis Boys biggest hunks will be performing at the Emerald Isle, with a tongue-incheek show that is guaranteed to put a smile on your face, and perhaps the odd blush or two, too. There’s nothing sleazy about these boys, though, and it really is all good clean-ish fun. You will definitely love their bare faced cheek(s). The show will be hosted by the delicious, beautiful and always glamorous Miss Linda Legless, who comes to you all the way from Leicester. Miss Legless will be slipping a few songs and her own unique brand of comedy in between the boys. Christine from Polenastics Espana, one of the event’s sponsors, and a few of her girls will be there to amaze with their pole dancing antics. Plus, there will be lots of other girly attractions with jewellery and clothes stalls, lovely fashion items from Essence in San Miguel, another of

the event’s sponsors, a fun raffle and lots of other goodies for you to get your hands on during the night – er, that doesn’t include the boys, although you can snuggle up for a photo. Tickets cost just 10 euros and are available from The Emerald Isle, Easy Ads in La Zenia, The Post Room in Benijofar or online at www.ticketplanner.es Well, that’s me finished for another week. If you’re a bar owner or an entertainer and want to appear in the gig guide, or you have any events coming up that you would like me to tell everyone about, then please contact me by email at mandy@starsinbars.org, call me on 685 302 529, or just visit my website www.starsinbars.org

Mandy

DATE

VENUE

ACT/ EVENT

OTHER INFO

FRIDAY 9th

Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Arches in los Alcazares Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Edwardos in Villamartin La Marina Sports Complex in La Marina

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Lynden B J.J Soulman Andy McBride Michael Starr

Starting at 10pm Comedy Show

Celtic Drop in Playa Flamenca Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Arches in Los Alcazares Lodosol in San Pedro The Park in Via Park II Carls Bar in Los Montesinos Sportsman in Quesada Bobby’s Bar in Quesada

Cabaroke with Davy Jones Claire Daniels Nick Barker Tim Ross Lynden B Jimmy Mac PDQ Samantha Curtis

Starting at 10pm

Snug in Torre de la Horredada Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos The Vault in El Galan Casa Ventura in San Luis Lo Marabu in Dona Pepa Boulevard Cafe in los Alcazares

Lenny Mitchell Cabaroke with Matt Christian Lorna Michelle Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke Kye Jaymes

MONDAY 12th

Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Boulevard Cafe in Los Alcazares Bocados in Los Dolses

D.J Jay Shirelle The Crooners

TUESDAY 13th

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Bar Rosa in Los Montesinos Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Boulevard Cafe in Los Alcazares

Kens Quiz Quiz night with Darren James Karaoke with Ruby Blues Karaoke with D.J Jay Lorna Michelle

Starting at 9pm

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Montes Bar in Los Montesinos Restaurant La Boca in Playa Los Locos Arches in Los Alcazares Diablo’s in Cabo Roig Boulevard Cafe in Los Alcazares Black Bull in Torremendo

Crazy Bingo with Spike Fun Music Quiz B.J Bluesman Tim Ross Magician & D.J Jay Debbie Slater Andy Jones

Starting at 4pm Starting at 9pm

Inn at the Green in Entre Naranjos Sisoma Romana in Dona Pepa The Priory in El Galan Bobby’s Bar in Quesada Boulevard Cafe in Los Alcazares Cavalier Bar in San Luis

Fun Music Quiz with Lynden B Tony Lincoln Lenny Mitchell Bobby Dazzler’s Karaoke J.J Soulman Woody

SATURDAY 10th

SUNDAY 11th

WEDNESDAY 14th

THURSDAY 15th

Rod Stewart tribute

Comedy show

Starting at 5pm Starting at 6pm

Starting at 8.30pm

Starting at 10pm

Starting at 9.30pm


31

Friday, September 9, 2011

HOT GOSSIP

Golden Birthday

We are still managing to have fun every day here at TKO. The best radio stations bringing you the best music and the funniest, professional DJs on the Costa Blanca! As the weather cools down slightly and the holiday makers go home, we are still here day in, day out, delivering to you what you want. On TKO fm we are giving away prizes most weeks courtesy of Lumsden Auctions, with our ´Beat the Intro´ competition. TKO fm has the best new music and the UK top 40, as well as those classics going back to around the 70s and especially the 80´s!! Our DJs play all your requests and love hearing from you in their shows. So do make sure you participate and you might even be lucky enough to win a prize. Both TKO fm and TKO Gold have their own Facebook pages, so if your into your ´poking´and ´messaging´ you can have online LIVE fun with our DJs as

they interact with you in all of their shows!

Also on Sunday September 11th it will TKO Gold´s 5th Birthday and we will be celebrating all next week with prizes and celebrations, so make sure you’re tuned into TKO Gold for your chance to win prizes and celebrate TKO Gold´s birthday with us in Golden style. So, Happy Birthday TKO Gold !!

Each week here in the Courier we are mentioning our sponsors and this week we take you to The Phone shop in Cabo Roig and the Post Box in Dona Pepa, they sponsor Dennis Christian´s show every week day morning and they have so many offers in store for you, they will unlock your phone allowing you to use any sim card, they have a full passport service, where they have application forms, take the pictures and even hand deliver all your documents right through to The British Consulate in Madrid. You can even pick up ´The right sized cabin bag´ perfect for airlines such as Ryanair and BMI Baby, to save you all that embarrassment of rummaging through your case in public, wondering what to throw away or costing you cash. Check out their website on www.thepostboxquesada.com or call the phone shop on 688 228 888. We would like to congratulate Andy James as he is celebrating his seventh year presenting his breakfast show today, so please make sure you text him in this morning and wish him well. After weeks and weeks, the children are finally back at school this week

Featured Artist PJ Harvey has become the first artist to win the prestigious Barclaycard Mercury Prize for a second time. The 41-year-old musician - who had long been the bookies' favourite - triumphed with her release Let England Shake which was inspired by modern conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan. Polly Jean Harvey beat acts such as chart-topper Adele and Brit-winning star Tinie Tempah to the £20,000 prize. She had previously won the Mercury a decade ago on the night of September 11 and on that occasion was trapped in Washington DC following the earlier terrorist attacks. Harvey wore a full-length white dress with a white leather bodice shaped like a strait-jacket - the design of which had been inspired by her album - to attend the ceremony at London's Grosvenor House Hotel. Collecting the prize last night she said: "Thank you for the recognition of my work on this album. "It's also good to be here this evening. When I last won 10 years ago on September 11, 2001 I was watching the Pentagon burning from my hotel window.

"So much has happened since then. This album took me a long time to write. It was very important to me. I wanted to make something meaningful, not just for myself but for other people, and hopefully to make something that would last." The album features graphic lyrics about warfare, as well as allusions to other songs and unusually includes the prominent use of an autoharp, played by Harvey. Speaking backstage, the singer-songwriter took time out to praise her fellow

nominees and picked out Everything, Everything and Adele. She said: "I'm certainly going to go out and buy some records now because some of them I haven't heard before." She said she had not allowed herself to think what she would spend her money on, adding: "I didn't want my mind to start racing if nothing were to happen so I'll give it some careful thought and I'll need to think about that for the next few days." But she said winning the prize again encouraged her to continue down her own particular career path. She said: "It makes me want to continue to go about my work the way I always have done which is taking great care and seriousness over it and it just encourages me to keep doing that." She also revealed she is already working on her next project, saying: "I'm a writer that works all the time, I write every day so already my work has started to develop into what will be the next project." So, well done to P.J Harvey, she was one of our favourites here at the Towers to win and it´s great to see some well thought up lyric’s for a change!

and Andy´s been very busy on the Breakfast show with his school run request slot from 8.30 in the morning, so if you want to get a song on for yourself, or your mum and dad taking you to school... or even if you need a hand to get the kids out of bed, Andy will help you do that too!

If you would like to sponsor a show or a slot, like the weather or the charity billboard or the TKO weekly Power Play, all you need to do is contact us here at the TKO Towers and we will make you something exciting to broadcast on air. Get your Business Awareness Campaign started on TKO and let everybody know about what you do!

WIN A MEAL FOR TWO AND WINE AT QUESADA FISH & CHIPS POP QUIZ September 9 Welcome to the famous TKO Gold pop quiz! We sure did have some fun with last week’s questions. Let´s see if you can win yourself a meal for two at Quesada fish and chips. All you have to do is take the first letter from each answer to find the name of a band or artist. Once you have found the key word listen in to Chris Ashley´s show on TKO Gold, Saturday mornings 9am – 12pm

1. He fiddled on the roof. 2. Annie & Dave in this group. 3. Marc & Cher trotted around this city. 4. A nurse was selling poppies from a tray on this thoroughfare. 5. Joe Meek formed this spaced out group. 6, Paul Carrack sang with this band. 7. Who were those girls OMD waxed lyrical about. 8. This Janis was angst ridden at 17. 9. John Osbourne changed his name to this. 10. Country capital


32

Friday, September 9, 2011

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week's puzzle, 15 represents B and 24 represents N, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Fastener (5) 4 Stratagem (6) 9 Largest anthropoid ape (7) 10 Conditions (5) 11 Level (4) 12 Genuine (7) 13 Beam (3) 14 Competent (4) 16 Location (4) 18 Embers (3) 20 Alfresco (7) 21 Consumes (4) 24 Daub (5) 25 Height (7) 26 Deliberate (6) 27 Lacks (5)

Down 1 Young swan (6) 2 Concur (5) 3 Ashen (4) 5 Surprise (8) 6 Anguish (7) 7 Type of nut (6) 8 Flower (5) 13 Imagination (8) 15 In the middle of (7) 17 Tittle-tattle (6) 18 Come up (5) 19 Evaluate (6) 22 Severe (5) 23 Acquire (4)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Blatant, 5 Curio, 8 Outside, 9 Apple, 10 Throb, 11 Possess, 12 Pester, 14 Hassle, 17 Relapse, 19 Slang, 22 Amaze, 23 Realise, 24 Sheds, 25 Sincere. Down: 1 Boost, 2 Actor, 3 Amiable, 4 Twerps, 5 Chaos, 6 Repress, 7 Oversee, 12 Perhaps, 13 Salvage, 15 Abstain, 16 Debris, 18 Press, 20 Alike, 21 Grebe.

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Gets Sid to sort out compendiums (7) 5 Arab leader heard frothy milk drink (5) 8 Not a journalist is famous (5) 9 Does pie tossing occur in this instalment? (7) 10 Extends new cat’s lease (9) 12 Card expert (3) 13 Point to the lock showing strain (6) 14 Left with the horrible cries of the fossils (6) 17 Sister gets nothing, we hear (3) 18 Green light for Clarence, a revolutionary (9) 20 An unstable ‘tec in ageold time (7) 21 Conclude a mountain fern is actually inside (5) 23 The fragrance is on its way, we are told (5) 24 Internet search aids for motors (7) STANDARD CLUES

Across 1 Absorbs (7) 5 Agitate (5) 8 Well-known (5) 9 Incident (7) 10 Intensifies (9) 12 Champion (3) 13 Emphasis (6) 14 Mementos (6) 17 Religious woman (3) 18 Taking away (9) 20 Antiquated (7) 21 Deduce (5) 23 Fragrance (5) 24 Motors (7)

Down 1 See 22 2 Obtain contract? (3) 3 Doctor Les adds burdens (7) 4 Good men digest small Scottish candies (6) 5 Mistakes made on the cricket field (5) 6 Scramble a Tornado I worship (9) 7 The peeled potato lacked sight (7) 11 Old hag left in charge in history (9) 13 Some slippers and also shoes (7) 15 The bauble is in the first year ringmaster’s possession (7) 16 Intelligent leader embraces a tender nature (6) 18 Credit record time moved slowly (5) 19 Laser treatment results in peers (5) 22/1 Exotic cabaret at a supporters’ ball (3,5)

Down 1 See 22 2 Obtain (3) 3 Burdens (7) 4 Candies (6) 5 Slides (5) 6 Love (9) 7 Unseeing (7) 11 Account (9) 13 Summer shoes (7) 15 Jewellery (7) 16 Kind (6) 18 Crawled (5) 19 Peers (5) 22/1 Exotic cabaret performance (3,5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Assets, 4 Darted, 9 Tractor, 10 Terse, 11 Sieve, 12 Narrate, 13 Grasshopper, 18 Austere, 20 Taste, 22 Irons, 23 Vantage, 24 Heeded, 25 Cactus. Down: 1 Attest, 2 Shade, 3 Totters, 5 Altar, 6 Terrace, 7 Diesel, 8 French Leave, 14 Restore, 15 Petunia, 16 Danish, 17 Severs, 19 Elsie, 21 Smart.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words Pie Or Sap Us Six 3 letter words Son Ale Sot Are Ten Art Tie Ate Toe Awe Tot Axe Use Ban 4 letter words Coo Aide Cot Alms Dam Anon Den Ante End Aria Ice Bare Owe Boat Pen Caps

Clad Diva Eddy Edgy Emit Gain Gate Iced Land Lean Long Mode Neon Omit Once Peen Plod Revs Rods

5

6 7

8

Sane Sent Viva letter words Baste Saint Siren letter words Staple Status letter words Miracle Persist Statute Tensile letter words Ancestor Scenario

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Sacks (bags) (5) 4 Proyectos (intenciones) (5) 8 To attend (7) 9 Friend (f) (5) 10 To believe (think) (5) 11 Agujas (costura) (7) 12 Sagrado (lugar, libro) (6) 14 Patatas fritas (de bolsa) (6) 18 Shellfish (as food) (7) 20 Llevar (transportar) (5) 22 Swedish (f) (5) 23 Servicios (7) 24 Smooth (skin, hair) (5) 25 Daughter-in-law (5)

Down 1 Espina dorsal (5) 2 Fourteen (7) 3 Fuerte (físicamente) (6) 4 Plato (para comer) (5) 5 Rings (on finger) (7) 6 Jabones (5) 7 Salsas (culinario) (6) 13 Plum (fruit) (7) 15 Recibir (dinero, apoyo, llamada, noticias) (7) 16 El más tímido (6) 17 Algodón (material) (6) 18 Neblinas (5) 19 Esclavo (5) 21 Wheel (5)


33

Friday, September 9, 2011 Across 1 Which nine-aside game is played by the Cleveland Indians and the San Francisco Giants? (8) 7 Derived from the Greek for ‘bottomless’, what name is often given to a deep or seemingly measureless chasm? (5) 8/21 Meaning ‘one out of many’, what is the national motto of the USA? (1,8,4) 9 Which word can follow beer, bath, mouse, place and table? (3) 10 What is the standard monetary unit of the People’s Republic of China? (4) 11 What name is given to an open rebellion against the proper authorities, especially by soldiers or sailors against their officers? (6) 13 German athletes Jürgen Schult and Gabriele Reinsch are the current world record holders in which athletics event? (6) 14 Which grass with wide flat leaves is cultivated in Europe and America for permanent pasture and hay and for lawns? (6) 17 Which two-piece swimsuit for women is named after an atoll in the western Pacific where an atom bomb was exploded in 1946? (6) 18 Which loose flowing outer garment was worn by the citizens of ancient Rome? (4) 20 Which dark, thick flammable liquid, consisting of a mixture of hydrocarbons, resins, alcohols, and other compounds, is distilled from wood or coal? (3) 22 Which thick conserve, made from lemons, butter, eggs, and sugar, is also known as lemon cheese? (5,4) 23 What title is given to a council convened to discuss

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

ecclesiastical business? (5) 24 From the Greek for ‘vine branch’, which climbing plant of the buttercup family bears white, pink, or purple flowers and feathery seeds? (8) Down 1 What is former England cricketer Sir Ian Botham’s nick-

name? (5) 2 What name was often given to the rulers of Muslim countries, especially of the former Ottoman Empire? (7) 3 Lazlo who invented the ball-point pen? (4) 4 Which political party won the 1997, 2001 and 2005 British general elections? (6) 5 What general name is given to a member of certain peoples of very short stature in equatorial Africa and parts of SE Asia? (5) 6 In chemistry, what name is given to one of two or more atoms with the same atomic number but with different numbers of neutrons? (7) 7 The trials of the supporters of the Duke of Monmouth after their defeat at the Battle of Sedgemoor, held in SW England in 1685 were known as the Bloody what? (7) 12 Often regarded as an object of derision, what name is given to the husband of an adulteress? (7) 13 What title is given to a person who is qualified to treat the diseases and conditions that affect the teeth and gums? (7) 15 In which lawn game are wooden balls driven through a series of square-topped hoops by means of mallets? (7) 16 Which opaque or semi-transparent glassy substance is applied to metallic or other hard surfaces for ornament or as a protective coating? (6) 17 What name is given to water saturated or strongly impregnated with salt? (5) 19 Which major mountain system runs the length of the Pacific coast of South America? (5) 21 See 8 Across

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH Pescado –Fish Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

1. In Which Country Is Mount Cook Named After The Explorer Captain James Cook? 2. In Which Country Is The Source Of The River Thames? 3. Which Country Grows The Most Potatoes Per Annum? 4. What Is The Largest US State By Area? 5. Of Which Country Is Rangoon The Capital? 6. Hanoi Is The Capital Of Which Country? 7. In which country is the Great Victoria Desert? 8. In which country is Angel Falls? 9. What European capital city is not on a river? 10. Which Country Has The Most Countries Bordering It? 11. Of Where Are The Maoris The Indigenous Population? 12. "Created By German Scientists In 1876, What Was The First Artificial Favoring "? 13. Which country uses a Lek as a unit of currency? 14. Which Is Europe's Largest Country After Russia? 15. What city stands on the Maas River? 1. New Zealand 2. Gloucestershire 3. Russia 4. Alaska 5. Burma 6. Cuba 7. Australia 8. Venezuela 9. Madrid 10. China (16) 11. New Zealand 12. Vanilla Essence 13. Albania 14. Ukraine 15. Rotterdam

ANSWERS

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across:1 Tabloids, 7/11 Dylan Thomas, 8 Hoi polloi, 9 Eel, 10 Elan, 13 Trepan, 14 Encore, 17 Abseil, 20 Rap, 22 Thumbnail, 23/18 Sally Ride, 24 Beatniks. Down: 1 Tahoe, 2 Brigade, 3 Oboe, 4 Delphi, 5 Blues, 6 Enclave, 7 Diamond, 12 Varsity, 13 Tigress, 15 Origami, 16 Minute, 17 Apple, 19 Ellis, 21 Abet.

16. sardina, k. sea beam, l. skate, 7. arenque, 18. dorada, m. lobster, n. squid, 19. salmonete, o. crab, 20. trucha. p. spiny lobster, q. clam, r. razor clam, a. mussel, b. sardine, s. cockle, t. snail. c. trout, d. herring, e. prawn, f. octopus, g. oyster, h. red mullet, i. anchovy, j. cuttlefish,

NGAZABDCLOXDFJP BOQROHAXQNRGVAE GJRFENCAINAWTSJ HSEEGNIUACMZHLR GFIRUPQVROAQOVK QAEBEQAUHTLCQUI SJMSRJOCEBAFMLS OAFBABEBRRCEESR KCLMARDCACNCJAJ B Q B M E Q H CYAS K I LV DTRBOGAVANTELMO SARDINADARODLEP HEEKIPEOSTRAOJL BWVXNEDTURLENAU ATS O G NALE G UYI B P Soduko

Span - Eng

Answers: 1f, 2j, 3n, 4q, 5t, 6s, 7r, 8g, 9a, 10e, 11m, 12o, 13p, 14l, 15i, 16b, 17d, 18k, 19h, 20c.

Geography QUIZ

1.pulpo, 2. sepia, 3. calamar, 4. almeja, 5. caracol, 6. berberecho, 7. navaja, 8. ostra, 9. mejillon, 10. gamba, 11. bogavante, 12. cangrejo, 13. langosta, 14. raya, 15. boqueron,

ALMEJA

LANGOSTA

ARENQUE

MEJILLON

BERBERECHO

NAVAJA

BOGAVANTE

OSTRA

BOQUERON

PULPO

CALAMAR

RAYA

CANGREJO

SALMONETE

CARACOL

SARDINA

DORADA

SEPIA

GAMBA

TRUCHA

Quizword

Fill It In


34

Friday, September 9, 2011

Horoscopes By Pandora Aries March 21 - April 19 Everything you hear today will sound echoey and dull. A trip to the doctors might be necessary later next week. "Thinking strategically" is a cop-out. You did what you did because you're a selfish competitive little person. Your talents dictate that you will not go so far.

Vino kiss has ruined friendship

Dear Rose I am writing to you as I have a very delicate problem that I cannot discuss with any of my friends. My husband and I are very good pals with another couple who we met when we came out to live in Spain. We socialise a lot with them and Anne (the wife and I do a lot of girly things together. Recently we went camping together for a weekend and both my husband and Anne were tired and went to bed. Roger and I sat up talking and had a few vinos. Suddenly he leant forward and tried to kiss me. I was so shocked and surprised I just pushed him away and said I was going to bed. I am now in such a state not knowing if I should tell my husband or not. This will cause so much aggravation between us all and we were so happy before. What do you think I should do. CONNIE, Guardamar

l

Dear Connie. I can see how you feel as you do not want to hide things from your husband but in this case, as nothing happened and you did not want do anything, I think it would be best not to say anything on this occasion. Next time you go out together speak to Roger in private and tell him what you have done and that nothing like this must ever happen

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Deja vu is the feeling that someone's patronised you before (often by telling you what deja vu means). All your wishes can come true if you're willing to briefly take on a life of crime. The odds that you'll escape today without a serious injury, are incalculable.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 7. For no reason, I'm just going to throw the number 7 at you. SEVEN. Everything you think about yourself will not be called into question this week.

Cancer June 21 - July 22 The shop you like to buy your food from may suddenly disappear with a whooshing sound as you approach it. The horse you received in the mail has a diamondstudded golden tooth. Just thought I'd mention it.

again. Hopefully he will apologise and every- If you have a problem Romany thing will be forgotten. Rose can help you with, email In the meantime, carry her at office@thecourier.es on enjoying each other’s company. passenger made a similar remark. She told the other member of our table and they were outraged and Dear Rose Dear Rose said how much they had I THINK I have a problem I AM in a bit of a enjoyed my company and that a lot of women will quandary, perhaps you even the courier said I empathise with. can help me. I am a very had been a pleasure and Three years ago my son outgoing, lively person gave me a kiss. Should I remarried after a very and always try to smile quieten down or carry on unhappy relationship. and keep happy. Recently laughing? I was very happy for him I went on a short coach MARIANNE, La Finca but since his marriage I holiday which was excelDear Marianne. hardly see him at all. His lent and very good fun. I What a pleasure to wife’s parents died a few sat on a table of 10 people years ago and she seems and we all got on really get a letter from a jolly, to think that because she happy soul! There are well together. is now alone, my son On the first evening we too many miserable, should not associate with had a wonderful time and mean spirited people his family. If everYone I entertained the group about. My son has fallen out you were with a lot of funny stories around with his sister and they do and we could not stop pleased to be in your not speak, which really laughing. The following company, surely that upsets me. I cannot speak day one of the coach tells you something? to my son about his wife party approached my Go ON, keep smiling as he really loves her and friend and told her to stop and making people they are so happy togethme laughing as it dis- laugh. It really is the er. What should I do? turbed him. One other best medicine. IRENE, QUESADA Dear Irene. Yes, you are right. This is a very common problem. In a perfect world you would be able to speak to your daughter-in-law and tell her how you feel but I understand that you do not think you are able to do this in case it causes trouble with your son. All I can advise is that you are patient and keep in touch with your son and try to include his wife in family events. Maybe she will surprise you and become a second daughter. Best of luck.

Son’s wife is a pain

Should life be a laugh?

l

l

Leo July 23 - August 22 A talk show that you overhear today is likely to concern principles on which you base your life. Listen closely and they might knock down all those principles.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Don't be a player hater. No, we don't know what that means either. The faster you travel today, the more likely you are to pick up a speeding ticket. If Jesus were here, he'd probably bless you in light of what's going to happen to you today.

Libra September 23 - October 22 Take care when opening up an email from a friend today as you may not enjoy the electronic content inside. The size of your shoes indicates that you are unlikely to fall over in a mild earthquake. Tantalising new evidence that you're about to have fun is going to reveal itself today.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Your life may seem boring compared to others, however, you *do* have a nice car. A masterplan is forming inside your head and you'll be ready to put it into action any day now. You are ready for a fall this week after some good luck in the recent past.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Whenever you feel unhappy today, smile and go to the toilet. This action should soon turns things around for you. Avoiding the cracks on pavements can seem like a fun game, and probably is. Your ability to play this game may be affected by one or more broken legs.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Your favourite sources of protein may dry up later tomorrow, so remember to eat lots of eggs RIGHT NOW! Your lack of self-control "down there" may mean you're limited to small forays to the bathroom today. Sitting at a computer in order to read websites is not advised.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Keep an eye on your watch today as time might run away from you. Going to the movies is an excellent way to spend your final hours. I mean, final hours of the day, obviously. Not of your life.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Your funny bone may have disappeared momentarily. However, it may turn up where you least expect it. Life will throw many things at you over the coming months, including a book-shelf which you probably should have ensured was fixed more firmly to the wall.


35

Friday, September 9, 2011

TRELI ON THE TELLY WAY OFF-COLOUR

ANT and Dec are the TV equivawhich was heavily diluted for mid-evening mainstream conlent of a supermarket BOGOF sumption after an edition of Eastenders. Jonathan .Buy One, Get One Free. Now that it’s back where it belongs, fans like me are cerRoss: Back They’re a great duo who are very tain that its old clout will return, rather than the sanitised verat his best comfortable doing live television, sion that has run for the last couple of years. and if you combine them with the I also can’t believe the show has run for ten years, but Svengali with the golden touch, that’s an excellent excuse for a BBC2 tribute night tomorrow Simon Cowell, and his new format, evening, which you might prefer to all the flag-waving of the Red or Black, you’re guaranteed to Last Night of the Proms! have a winner for ITV 1, are you I’m not a great fan of quick repeats, but BBC 1 has got it not? right with Mrs Brown’s Boys. They are giving us a wonderful Sorry. Not in this case. way to end the week with some good old fashioned belly I really couldn’t care less who won and who didn’t in this laughs by bringing us the first series of Mrs.Brown’s Boys on tedious and stretched out affair. If the whole evening had a Friday night. been cut to around 45 minutes, it might have just worked, but It’s top-class knockabout fun which doesn’t give a damn to have it running every night for over a week is just plain about political correctness, and it’s clear that the cast and the daft. studio audience are having a great time, which immediately He looked very comfortable, and has also got rid of that spills over to the viewers at home. We even got X-Factor style sob-stories of how winning a million pounds would change somebody’s life, which of awful facial hair that seemed to have been borrowed from a By the way, next week’s episode features some rather course we know it would. Talk about stating the proverbial gorilla. Lewis Hamilton wasn’t exactly the most fantastic of unconventional bikini waxing. Don’t miss it because it will obvious! My overall impression was that everything including opening show guests, but that was more than compensated have you in hysterics. It’s that funny, as proved when my the kitchen sink for by the appearance of the entertaining singer, Adele. neighbours watched Ross, on his day, can be a very good interviewer, as any- a recording of it, and has been Ant and chucked at Red body who has seen his BBC film programmes can vouch for. we just listened to Dec: Show or Black in the And his new show is certainly a very entertaining way of their raucous unconis a dud hope that the passing an hour, as long as he can get A-list guests to join trolled laughter comviewers will latch him on the sofa. ing through our wall! onto something. You can tell the summer TV season is over as, like a line Finally, some Ultimately it’s of double-decker buses, we have the return of three of the advance notice for turned out to be very best BBC panel shows to our screens. I’m talking about anyone who loves a complete Mock The Week, Would I Lie to You and QI and its great to top-class entertaining mess and a very have them back. drama. Clear the rare turkey for They have a common thread in three excellent hosts in the decks for Sunday Cowell and the form of Messrs O’Briain, Brydon and Fry. And if you don’t September 18, the Geordie duo, have a ringmaster of their class, then you are doomed to fail, night when series two which shows as they rely on their sharpness and wit, rather than what has of Downton Abbey that even the very best can come up with an A-grade dud. been programmed into an autocue machine. starts on ITV1. I’ve I know Jonathan Ross is not everybody’s cup of tea, but QI actually returns tonight on BBC2, and thank heavens it seen the first episode and I’ll guarantee fans will not be disI’ve always been a huge fan. So I’m delighted to see him has transferred back from BBC1. Part of its success, besides appointed. And of course, Dame Maggie Smith is back in back hosting a chat show at his new home of ITV1. the wonderful Fry being in the chair, was its naughtiness delicious humorous form.

with ALEX TRELINSKI

WATER FOR ELEPHANTS 12 FOLLOWING the untimely death of his parents, aspiring veterinarian Jacob Jankowski (Robert Pattinson) decides to abandon his day to day life, opting to jump on the next train out of town. He ends up on a carriage owned by the Benzini Brothers Circus, a group of performers led by the tyrannical August (Christoph Waltz). When August becomes aware of Jacob’s college education, he appoints the young man as the Circus’s official vet, insisting that he apply special attention toward training and caring for the show’s latest acquisi-

CAST: Robert Pattinson, Reese Witherspoon, James Frain, Christoph Waltz. DIRECTOR: Francis Lawrence GENRE: Drama RATING: 3.5/5 RUNNING TIME: 120 min. tion, a gorgeous elephant named Rosie. Jacob quickly bonds with his patients and other members of the Benzini troupe, especially August’s beautiful wife Marlena (Reese Witherspoon). As Marlena and Jacob begin connecting romantically, the psychotic August starts to notice, placing everyone in his reach, including a tranquil Rosie, at risk. With “Water for Elephants”

Francis Lawrence continues to display a great directorial eye, even if some of his storytelling sensibilities could benefit from finer tuning. Lawrence does a terrific job of concocting a sense of time and place, creating a truly regal big top atmos-

phere for the tale to unfold in. The cinematography glows, instilling the film with a surface level beauty and elegance that can’t be disputed. Lawrence shows decent command of the picture’s narrative, combing the core romance succinctly with the other often more compelling subplots. “Water for Elephants” is also an interesting study of power, the

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screenplay concentrating with particular verve on August’s abuse of his employees, animals and even wife. I’m not sure if this element shines simply due to Waltz’s sublime contribution, but it’s undeniably the most complex and disturbing arc “Water for Elephants” has at its disposal. Thanks to the lovable beast, this movie has more in common with "Dumbo" than "The Greatest Show On Earth". But this is not a bad thing. Fans of the book and Big Top adventures will be thrilled by this cinematic

journey. "Water For Elephants" may not be the greatest movie on earth, but it's far from being a white elephant.


36

Friday

9th Semptember

00:35 The Unbearable Lightness of Being 03:25 Gerry and the GPs Panorama 03:55 Countryfile 04:55 Food Fighters 05:40 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Operation Hospital Food with James Martin 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 To Build or Not to Build 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather 16:05 Animals at Work 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Dick & Dom Go Wild 17:30 Serious Explorers: Livingstone 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 A Question of Sport 22:00 Outnumbered 22:30 Would I Lie to You? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 John Bishop's Britain

05:40 Close 07:00 Little Robots 07:10 Guess with Jess 07:20 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:35 Little Charley Bear 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Hai! Karate: Journey to Japan 08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie 08:45 League of Super Evil 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Trapped 09:25 Green Balloon Scrapbook 09:55 Dirtgirlworld 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:35 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Nuzzle & Scratch 11:05 Get Squiggling! 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Reel History of Britain 20:00 Coast 20:30 Gorillas Revisited with David Attenborough 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 Digging for Britain 23:00 QI 23:30 Newsnight: The 9/11 Decade

00:20 The Conspiracy Files: 9/11 Ten Years On 01:20 The Tudors 02:15 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk

Four former rugby union players try to host the best dinner party for a chance of winning the ÂŁ1,000 prize for their chosen charities. Kyran Bracken kicks off the week with a game of egg Russian roulette followed by Martin Offiah, who plans a night of fine dining including mussels and a Nigerian stew. Victor Ubogu then takes the reins, introducing his guests to some sheep, before Gareth Chilcott ends the competition by trying to liven up the hung-over diners

00:35 Strictly Kosher 01:35 The Zone 01:36 ITV News Headlines 03:35 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 04:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Live Rugby World Cup 10:15 Live Rugby World Cup 12:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Red or Black? 22:00 Coronation Street 22:30 Red or Black?: Results 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Rugby World Cup Highlights

COME DINE WITH ME: RUGBY SPECIAL

00:05 Seven Dwarves 01:05 Laura Marling Special 01:25 Hollyoaks Music Show 01:50 4Play: Penguin Prison 02:05 Sounds from the Cities 02:30 Last Days 04:05 Brothers & Sisters 04:50 Smallville 05:30 Countdown 06:15 Cookery School 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 According to Jim 09:30 Frasier 10:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 10:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Three in a Bed 14:05 River Cottage Bites 14:10 Channel 4 Presents - Danielle Brown 2012 14:15 Channel 4 Racing 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 4thought.tv 20:35 Love Rat 21:00 Come Dine with Me: Rugby World Cup Special 22:00 The Million Pound Drop Live 23:30 Comedy Showcase: Coma Girl

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:10 New Cowboy Builders 06:00 Rough Guide to Cities 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Milkshake! Music Box 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:20 Milkshake! 08:25 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 12:45 5 News Lunchtime 12:50 Celebrity Big Brother: The Final 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Incident in a Small Town 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Pawn Stars 21:00 The Gadget Show 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother: The Winner's Story 22:30 Big Brother: Live Launch


37

Saturday 10th September

00:05 Mrs Brown's Boys 00:35 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:45 Hart's War 02:45 Monty Halls' Great Irish Escape 03:45 Wonderstuff 04:15 Saints and Scroungers 04:45 Antiques Road Trip 05:30 British Olympic Dreams 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Our World 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 Football Focus 13:00 BBC News; Regional News 13:10 Formula 1: The Italian Grand Prix - Qualifying 15:15 Live Golf: Walker Cup 17:30 Final Score 18:10 BBC News; Regional News 18:25 Epic Win 19:10 Strictly Come Dancing Launch Show 20:15 Doctor Who 21:00 The National Lottery: Secret Fortune 21:50 BBC News; Weather 22:10 Last Night of the Proms 23:45 Match of the Day

00:35 01:35 03:10 03:30 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00

The Secret World of Whitehall The Lives of the Saints BBC News HARDtalk BBC News Click Newswatch BBC News

05:30 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 08:00 08:30 08:50 09:05 09:35 10:00 10:55 11:25 11:40 12:00 12:15 Lab 12:40 13:00 13:20 14:20 15:05 17:00 17:30 19:15 20:00 20:30 22:00 22:45 23:45

Close Little Robots Guess with Jess Pinky Dinky Doo Little Charley Bear Rastamouse Roar Arthur Dennis and Gnasher Hounded Splatalot Live 'n' Deadly Dick & Dom Go Wild League of Super Evil Wolverine and the X-Men OOglies Richard Hammond's Blast MOTD Kickabout The Sky at Night The Great British Bake Off Escape to the Country EastEnders Victorian Pharmacy Live Golf: Walker Cup Flog It! Dad's Army Last Night of the Proms QI XL The Making of QI QI

00:35 Smile: That Was Candid Camera 01:29 The Zone 01:30 ITV News Headlines and weather 02:30 Live Rugby World Cup 05:10 Live Rugby World Cup 07:40 Live Rugby World Cup 10:00 Live Rugby World Cup 13:00 ITV News and Weather 13:04 Meridian Weather 13:05 Coronation Street 15:50 Johnny English 17:25 Rugby World Cup Highlights 18:40 Meridian News and Weather 18:50 ITV News and Weather 19:05 All Star Family Fortunes 20:00 Red or Black? 21:15 The X Factor 22:15 Red or Black?: Results 22:45 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:45 ITV News and Weather 23:59 Meridian Weather

STICTLY COME DANCING: LAUNCH SHOW

Bruce Forsyth and Tess Daly host a red-carpet event following this year's 14 celebrities as they meet their dance partners for the first time. Singer Dolly Parton guest stars on the show. The famous faces also take to the dance floor with a group number in front of the ever-critical judges Len Goodman, Bruno Tonioli, Craig Revel Horwood and Alesha Dixon.

00:05 Aliens 02:55 My Name Is Earl 03:45 The Real Housewives of New Jersey 04:30 Smallville 05:15 Countdown 06:00 Cookery School 06:55 The Treacle People 07:05 The Hoobs 07:55 FIM Superbike World Championship 08:25 British Formula 3 International Series 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 Hollyoaks Music Show 10:25 90210 11:20 Smallville 12:15 David Guetta's VIP Party! 12:50 The Simpsons 13:20 The Big Bang Theory 14:20 Road to London 2012: That Paralympic Show 14:55 Channel 4 Racing 17:05 Super Saturday 17:35 Come Dine with Me 18:35 Come Dine with Me 19:40 Come Dine with Me 20:10 Channel 4 News 20:40 4thought.tv 20:45 Bin Laden: Shoot to Kill 22:15 The Million Pound Drop Live 23:40 Rhod Gilbert & the Cat That Looked Like Nicholas

00:00 Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 One-Day International Cricket 01:55 SuperCasino 05:05 Motorsport Mundial 05:30 Nick's Quest 05:55 Rough Guide to Eco Escapes 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Elmo's World 08:05 Milkshake! Monkey 08:10 The Save-Ums! 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 Hana's Helpline 09:00 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Animal Families 11:00 Inside Hollywood 11:05 Meerkat Manor 11:35 The Gadget Show 12:35 Big Brother: Launch Show 14:05 Calamity Jane 16:05 Chief Crazy Horse 17:45 White Hunter, Black Heart 20:00 5 News Weekend 20:05 Law & Order 20:55 NCIS 21:50 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 22:45 Big Brother 23:45 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation


38

Sunday 11th September 01:05 The Football League Show 02:25 BBC News 02:30 Portrait of an Artist 03:00 BBC News 03:30 Dateline London 04:00 BBC News 04:30 Our World 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Portrait of an Artist 07:00 Breakfast 08:40 Match of the Day 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 Country Tracks 12:00 Weather for the Week Ahead 13:00 BBC News 13:10 Formula 1: The Italian Grand Prix - Live 16:15 Britain Remembers September 11th 17:15 Songs of Praise 17:55 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:25 Strictly Come Dancing Launch Show 19:30 Nature's Miracle Babies 20:30 Countryfile 21:30 Inspector George Gently 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 My Favourite Joke 23:55 Outnumbered

00:15 QI 00:45 QI 01:15 TOTP2 Goes Disco! 02:45 Exiled 04:25 Close 07:00 Little Robots 07:10 Guess with Jess 07:20 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:35 Little Charley Bear 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Roar 08:30 Arthur 08:55 Junior MasterChef 09:25 Bear Behaving Badly 09:45 Me and My Monsters 10:15 Jinx 10:35 Wingin' It 11:00 Something for the Weekend 12:30 Live Golf: Walker Cup 14:30 America Remembers September 11th 16:15 Live Golf: Walker Cup 19:00 Digging for Britain 20:00 Top Gear 21:00 Operation Crossbow 22:00 World's Most Dangerous Roads 23:00 Match of the Day 2

00:00 United 93 01.59 The Zone 02:00 ITV News Headlines 04:20 Heist 05:10 Live Rugby World Cup 07:30 Live Rugby World Cup 10:10 Live Rugby World Cup 13:00 ITV News and Weather 13:09 Meridian Weather 13:10 Funniest Ever You've Been Framed! 14:15 Survival: Tales from the Wild 15:15 The X Factor 16:15 Midsomer Murders 18:15 Rugby World Cup Highlights 19:30 Meridian News and Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Holding Out for a Hero 21:00 The X Factor 22:00 Appropriate Adult 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:44 Meridian Weather 23:45 Sixty Six

WORLD TRADE CENTRE Drama based on a true story starring Nicolas Cage, Maria Bello, Michael Pe単a and Maggie Gyllenhaal. As two New York Port Authority policemen lie trapped under the debris of the collapsed World Trade Center on 11 September 2001, their wives and families face a grim wait for news and try not to give up hope that they might be rescued.

00:45 Super Saturday 02:10 Garden State 03:50 Mesh: The Wrong Turn 03:55 Mesh: Love Tube 04:00 3 Minute Wonder: Youthdance 2006 04:05 Brothers & Sisters 04:50 Smallville 05:35 Hill Street Blues 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 The Grid 08:25 European Wheelchair Fencing Championships 2011 08:55 One Tree Hill 09:50 Hollyoaks 12:25 Ibiza Rocks 12:40 Super Saturday 14:10 Around the World in 80 Days 16:30 The Simpsons 17:05 The Simpsons 17:35 Deal or No Deal 18:35 4thought.tv 18:40 Channel 4 News 19:10 Journey to the Center of the Earth 21:00 Crusaders: Back from the Dead 22:00 Children of 9/11 23:35 World Trade Center

00:40 Forensic Files 01:10 SuperCasino 05:05 The FBI Files 05:50 Chinese Food in Minutes 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 Fireman Sam 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Elmo's World 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 The Save-Ums! 08:25 Noddy in Toyland 08:40 Hana's Helpline 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Olivia 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Animal Families 11:00 Garden ER 11:30 Mexican Food Made Simple 12:00 New Cowboy Builders 13:00 Big Brother 14:00 Murder by Death 15:50 Big Fish 18:10 Beetle Juice 20:00 One-Day International Cricket 21:00 5 News Weekend 21:05 Vantage Point 23:00 Big Brother


39

Monday

12th September 00:25 Sirens 02:00 Dragons' Den 03:00 Holby City 04:00 The Good Cook 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Helicopter Heroes 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 To Build or Not to Build 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Celebrity MasterChef 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Animals at Work 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Dick & Dom Go Wild 17:30 Horrible Histories 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Bang Goes the Theory 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Tsunami: The Survivors' Stories - Panorama 22:00 The Queen's Palaces 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport

00:00 00:30 02:05 03:45 04:00 04:30 05:00 07:00

Mock the Week 2 Days in Paris Photographing Fairies Sport Today Newsday The Super League Show Close Little Robots

07:10 Guess with Jess 07:20 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:35 Little Charley Bear 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Hai! Karate: Journey to Japan 08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie 08:40 Leon 08:45 League of Super Evil 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Trapped 09:30 Green Balloon Scrapbook 09:55 Dirtgirlworld 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:35 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Nuzzle & Scratch 11:05 Get Squiggling! 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The New Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 Real Rescues 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Antiques Road Trip 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Reel History of Britain 20:00 Coast 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Antiques Master 22:00 Dragons' Den 23:00 Shooting Stars 23:30 Newsnight

01:30 The Zone 03:05 Motorsport UK 04:00 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Little England 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Doc Martin 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather

THE TRUTH ABOUT DRUGS IN FOOTBALL Antony Barnett investigates the use of recreational and performance-enhancing substances in the nation's favourite sport. Along the way, he examines football's drugs-testing regime, raises questions about action taken against those found guilty of substance abuse, and highlights some of the many unusual - but perfectly legal - treatments players undergo. 23:35 The Big

02:00 American Football Live 05:45 Wogan's Perfect Recall 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 09:55 The Secret Millionaire USA 10:55 Jo Frost: Extreme Parental Guidance 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Three in a Bed 14:05 This Happy Breed 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 The Truth About Drugs in Football: Dispatches 22:00 Embarrassing Bodies 23:00 Rude Tube

00:00 Once upon a Time in Mexico 01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:10 Great Scientists 05:35 Divine Designs 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:15 The Circuit 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 How Do They Do It? 21:00 Royal Navy: Submarine Mission 21:00 5 News at 9 22:00 Soho Blues 23:00 Big Brother


40

Tuesday

13th September 00:05 Michael Clayton 02:05 The Great British Bake Off 03:05 Food Fighters 03:50 Antiques Road Trip 04:35 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Helicopter Heroes 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 To Build or Not to Build 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Celebrity MasterChef 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Animals at Work 16:35 Scoop 17:00 Gimme a Break 17:30 Barney's Latin America 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Holby City 22:00 The Body Farm 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The Bomb Squad

00:20 World's Most Dangerous Roads 01:20 Torchwood: Miracle Day 02:15 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report

04:35 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 08:00 08:30 08:40 08:45 08:55 09:00 09:30 09:55 10:05 10:15 10:35 10:45 11:05 11:20 11:45 12:05 12:35 13:00 13:30 14:00 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

Close Little Robots Guess with Jess Pinky Dinky Doo Little Charley Bear Rastamouse Hai! Karate: Journey to Japan Trust Me I'm a Genie Leon League of Super Evil Newsround Trapped Green Balloon Scrapbook Dirtgirlworld The Koala Brothers Driver Dan's Story Train Raa Raa the Noisy Lion Nuzzle & Scratch Get Squiggling! Zingzillas Waybuloo In the Night Garden The New Pink Panther Show Daily Politics GMT with George Alagiah Diagnosis Murder To Buy or Not to Buy Animal 24:7 Weakest Link Real Rescues Flog It! Antiques Road Trip Eggheads Reel History of Britain Dragons' Den The Great British Bake Off Hairy Bikers Meals on Wheels Never Mind the Buzzcocks Newsnight

01:10 Grimefighters 01:35 The Zone 01:35 ITV News Headlines 03:40 Champions League Weekly 04:05 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Mayday Mayday 21:00 Missing Millions 22:00 71 Degrees North 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 George A Romero's Land of the Dead

MISSING MILLIONS New series. Melanie Sykes and Paul Heiney reunite people with forgotten investments, from pensions and life insurance to shares, dividends and money put aside for a rainy day. Genealogist Nick Barratt and the team join the search for recipients who did not know they were entitled to a windfall and bring them the good news. The programme begins in Morecambe, Lancashire, where a ÂŁ13,000 savings plan has been sitting unclaimed for 20 years.

00:10 Coming Up: Hooked 00:45 Comedy Showcase: Coma Girl 01:15 4Play: Josh Osho 01:30 Rockfeedback Presents: Way Out West 01:50 WWI: Finding the Lost Battalions 03:20 Not Forgotten 04:15 Atlantic Convoys 05:10 Smallville 05:55 Cookery School 06:50 Yo Gabba Gabba! 07:15 The Hoobs 08:05 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 10:00 Supernanny USA 10:50 Supersize vs Superskinny 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Three in a Bed 14:05 The Secret Supper Club 14:30 Comanche 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Inside Nature's Giants 22:00 Seven Dwarves 23:00 Shameless

00:00 Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Grey's Anatomy 01:50 Inside Hollywood 02:00 SuperCasino 04:50 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:05 HouseBusters 05:30 HouseBusters 05:55 Rough Guide to Weekend Breaks 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Miami 16:15 Mind over Murder 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Chinese Food in Minutes 21:00 Mysteries of the Vampire Skeletons: Revealed 21:00 5 News at 9 22:00 CSI: Miami 23:00 Big Brother


41

Wednesday 14th September

00:35 My Boyfriend the War Hero 01:40 Harry's Arctic Heroes 02:40 Can't Take It with You 03:40 Antiques Road Trip 04:25 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Helicopter Heroes 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 12:00 To Build or Not to Build 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Celebrity MasterChef 16:00 BBC News; Weather; 16:05 Animals at Work 16:35 Scoop 17:00 School of Silence 17:30 Serious Explorers: Livingstone 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 Waterloo Road 21:30 Planet Dinosaur 22:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Live at the Apollo

00:20 02:10 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45

Tootsie Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today

04:00 04:25 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 08:00 08:30 08:40 08:45 08:55 09:00 09:30 09:55 10:05 10:15 10:30 10:40 11:00 11:15 11:40 12:00 12:30 14:00 14:30 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

Newsday Close Little Robots Guess with Jess Pinky Dinky Doo Little Charley Bear Rastamouse Hai! Karate: Journey to Japan Trust Me I'm a Genie Leon League of Super Evil Newsround Trapped Green Balloon Scrapbook Dirtgirlworld The Koala Brothers Driver Dan's Story Train Raa Raa the Noisy Lion Nuzzle & Scratch Get Squiggling! Zingzillas Waybuloo In the Night Garden Daily Politics See Hear To Buy or Not to Buy Animal 24/7 Weakest Link Real Rescues Flog It! Antiques Road Trip Eggheads Reel History of Britain Escape to the Country Natural World Horizon Have I Got Old News for You Newsnight

01:14 The Zone 01:15 ITV News Headlines 03:20 Heist 04:10 Live Rugby World Cup 06:35 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:15 Live Rugby World Cup 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight and Weather 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 UEFA Champions League: Extra Time

BEST OF BRITISH New series. Documentary following Paralympic athletes as they aim to be selected for the 2012 London games. Plus, interviews with staff and patients at the spinal unit at Stoke Mandeville Hospital, Buckinghamshire, a facility where many Paralympians have received treatment. This edition follows Dave Clarke, Robin Williams and Owen Bainbridge of the British blind football squad as they go through team selection, and looks into their family lives.

00:05 True Blood 01:10 Poker's Million Dollar Girl 02:10 Sailing 02:35 KOTV Boxing Weekly 03:00 European Wheelchair Fencing Championships 2011 03:30 Freesports on 4 03:55 The Grid 04:20 Beach Volleyball 05:15 British Formula 3 05:40 Grudge Match 05:50 Cookery School 06:45 Yo Gabba Gabba! 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Frasier 10:00 Supernanny USA 10:55 Supersize vs Superskinny 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Three in a Bed 14:05 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind: Gymnastics 14:10 Please Sir! 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Location, Location, Location 22:00 Grand Designs 23:00 Best of British

00:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 00:55 CSI: NY 01:45 Forensic Files 02:15 SuperCasino 04:50 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:05 HouseBusters 05:35 HouseBusters 05:55 Rough Guide to Islands 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:10 Plague City: Sars in Toronto 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Highland Emergency 20:30 5 News Update 21:00 Emergency Bikers 22:00 Law & Order: Criminal Intent 23:00 Big Brother


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Thursday 15th September

00:30 02:20 02:50 03:50 04:20 05:15 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 12:00 12:45 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:05 16:35 17:00 17:30 Lab 17:30 18:00 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

00:20 Story 01:20 02:20 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00 05:15

Flashbacks of a Fool See Hear Watchdog Bang Goes the Theory Country Tracks Newsday HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Helicopter Heroes Homes Under the Hammer To Build or Not to Build Cash in the Attic Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Celebrity MasterChef BBC News; Weather; Animals at Work Scoop Copycats Richard Hammond's Blast Deadly 60 Bites Newsround Pointless BBC News Regional News Programmes The One Show EastEnders Watchdog Torchwood: Miracle Day BBC News Regional News and Weather Question Time

Adopting Abroad: Saira's Damages Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Close

07:00 Little Robots 07:10 Guess with Jess 07:20 Pinky Dinky Doo 07:35 Little Charley Bear 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Hai! Karate: Journey to Japan 08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie 08:40 Leon 08:45 League of Super Evil 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Trapped 09:30 Green Balloon Scrapbook 09:55 Dirtgirlworld 10:05 The Koala Brothers 10:15 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:35 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:45 Nuzzle & Scratch 11:05 Get Squiggling! 11:20 Zingzillas 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 The New Pink Panther Show 13:00 Daily Politics 13:30 GMT with George Alagiah 14:00 Diagnosis Murder 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:15 Animal 24:7 16:00 Weakest Link 16:45 Real Rescues 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Antiques Road Trip 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Reel History of Britain 20:00 If Walls Could Talk: The History of the Home 21:00 Monty Halls' Great Irish Escape 22:00 How Facebook Changed the World: The Arab Spring 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 Rugby World Cup Highlights 01:35 The Zone 03:35 Columbo: Try and Catch Me 04:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Bosnia - Unfinished Business: Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Billy Connolly's Route 66 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 The Jonathan Ross Show

BILLY CONNELLYS ROUTE 66 New series. The comedian fulfils a lifelong dream of travelling along the world's most famous highway on his motor-trike. Beginning in Chicago, he goes to the top of the Willis Tower, America's tallest building, before visiting the home of Abraham Lincoln in Illinois and meeting the state's champion pie-maker. Going offroute, Billy heads to Amish country, where he takes a horse-drawn buggy ride, and then talks to two women in St Louis whose homes were recently destroyed by a tornado.

00:05 Shameless 01:10 Ibiza Rocks 01:40 4Play: Swedish House Mafia 01:55 The Album Chart Show: Spotlight 02:10 Superheroes of Suburbia 02:40 The Brothers 04:25 Swimming 04:40 Smallville 05:25 Countdown 06:10 Cookery School 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 08:55 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:25 Frasier 10:00 Supernanny USA 10:55 Supersize vs Superskinny 11:55 A Place by the Sea 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Three in a Bed USA 14:00 The Poseidon Adventure 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Country House Rescue 22:00 The Killing 23:55 Seven Dwarves

00:00 The Beat Goes On 00:55 Poker: The Big Game 01:50 SuperCasino 04:50 Chinese Food in Minutes 05:05 HouseBusters 05:30 HouseBusters 05:55 Rough Guide to Adventures 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 Roary the Racing Car 07:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 07:35 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:25 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:35 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 The Wright Stuff Extra with Gabby Logan 13:05 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Big Brother 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Mom at Sixteen 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:25 OK! TV 20:00 5 News at 7 20:30 Live UEFA Europa League Football 23:10 Big Brother


Friday, September 9, 2011

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Friday, September 9, 2011

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

10 cold drinks /snack vending machines with sites 44,900 euros. Excellent cash income, no overhead, operate from home 31,000 euros NETT per year one day p.w. to service.25 Pringle vending machines with sites 14,900 euros 250 euros per week NETT guaranteed, machines and sites available individually. 965 326 442 / 659 696 455 (09) Bar for sale. Quesada area. Going cheap. For information pack, email: . Tel: 688 800 960 (40)

CHURCH SERVICES

Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11:00am. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome 966 799 273 // 660 127 276. Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer. Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact PilarChristian. CommunityChurch@gmail.c om or contact Reverend Eddie on 966 7693 00 or 650 509 606. Reg No:2009-SG/A

Tel 685 777 254 (26)

ENERGY SAVING Want to save money on your electricity bills ? New energy saving device. Simply plug into wall socket and start saving on your bills. No installation. Guaranteed results. C E. Certification. www.powertunespain.com, powertunespain@gmail.co m, 625457555 agents wanted ! (29)

HAIRDRESSER English mobile hairdresser. 20 years experience. Prices from 6 euros. Almoradi, Algorfa, Benijofer, Rojales, Quesada, Guardamar, San Luis, Torrevieja areas. Call Jeri on 966 318 550 / 698 257 200. (30)

CARS FOR SALE

PROPERTY FOR RENT

1995 VW. Westfalia Campervan 1.9 Diesel . New Engine 2007. Many Extras. 11-000 euros Immaculate Condition. Details and Photos email ann.nicklin@hotmail.com

Luxury appartments, 2/3 bedrooms in San Miguel De Salinas. Floor heating, Elevator, Roof terrace with swimming pool,

from 385 euros/month Also holiday rentals and appartments in San Miguel de Salinas from 350 euros / month. 966 723 437 and 616 487 493 (27) Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 49, 2nd floor one bedroom apartment situated conveniently located in the town centre of Torrevieja, with a small sun balcony overlooking the lovely communal pool. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, South facing 3 bedroomed property situated injardin Del Mar VII, with communal pool nearby. Close to amenities. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near

COMPUTER CLUB

Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restaurants and bars. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 128, A lovely One bedroom 2nd floor apartment, American style kitchen, Lounge with patio doors to balcony, in the San Luis area. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104, Lovely Two Bedroom Apartment in Torrevieja, within walking distance of Friday Market and the beach. The Property

is close to the Habaneras Shopping Centre and Aquapark. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 155, Luxurious Three Bedroom Villa With Private Pool, in Quesada Close to shops and restaurants within a five minute drive, and Guadamar Beach is within a ten minute drive. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 708, A lovely two bedroom, one bathroom corner ground floor apartment with a spacious patio &

ROYAL BRITISH LEIGION

SWIMMING POOL MAINTENANCE

International Christian Assembly. Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non-denominational. Sunday services 11:00am. Children’s Church 11:00am. House groups in

AIR CONDITIONING

SPORTS EQUIPMENT LOCKSMITH

BUILDER

VAN HIRE REMOVALS

CAR MECHANIC

GARDENING

CARPENTER

SECURITY


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Friday, September 9, 2011 Residents off road parking. Communal pool near by. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE Gran Alacant, corner semi detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bathrooms, large garden, enclosed terrace, fully furnished, private drive for 2 cars, on gated desirable urbanisation Monte Faro, many facilities priced for quick sale 185,000 Tel 680333242 House for sale. Santiago de la Ribera, 3-4 bedrooms, lovely garden, two balconies, two fireplaces, quiet neighbourhood, five minutes walk to beach. Tel: 616596647 or 672192482 (22). Balsares, terraced 4 bedroomed house, 3 bathrooms, large underbuild, private underground parking direct to house, small gated urbanisation, directly over looking proposed new golf course opposite Gran Alacant, priced for quick sale at original off plan price 180.000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, 3 bedroomed, 3 bath mid terraced Altomar 1, views of Alicante Bay,

close to communal pool, walking distance to bars and resturants opportunity at reduced price 145,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, front line, 2 bed, 1 bath, downstairs toilet, fully furnished, roof terrace, walking distance to beaches, large communal and resturants, beach front property priced for quick sale 125,000 Tel 680333242 Quesada, detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bath, all large rooms, front enclosed conservatory, fully furnished, oiled fuelled heating, outdoor poolside kitchen and bbq area enclosed, large pool, outside toilet, garage for 2 cars, newly refurbished, established garden with fruit trees, set in a cul de sac on 1000m2, the overall plot can be divided, as registered as two plots, so this house could be a substantial investment opportunity, situated in the Dona pepe area close to Quesada town centre, priced 299,000 negotiable Tel 680333242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two

PROPERTIES REQUIRED

bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 510, €79,999. Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restaurants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626

397 397 Ref: 146, €85,000. Three bedroom Two bathroom quad house in Dream Hills. Off road parking on the front driveway with gates that can be padlocked for security. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €195,000. Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool. Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626

397 397 Ref: 30, €119,000. Two bedroom detached house with large front terrace. This villa is in the Punta Marina area close to Playa Flamenca , Close to amenities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off-road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 128, €34,950. One bedroom 2nd floor apartment located in San Luis. American style kitchen, Lounge with patio doors to balcony, with lovely views in the San Luis area. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

TUITION LEARN EFT. Cousin to acupuncture, no needles, tap with fingers. Helps pain, anxiety, illness, phobias, smoking etc. AAMET approved courses and Trainer Marie Holliday. www.eftspain.com eftspain@yahoo.com 673 976 313. (29)

SITUATIONS VACANT

PLUMBERS

PETS

BUSINESS GROUP

FURNITURE

PAVING

SHUTTERS

SURVEYS

NEWS AGENTS

SIGNS

MOSQUITOS

WANTED

LOCKSMITH


46

Friday, September 9, 2011

Did your football brain survive the summer?

THE Spanish season is finally under way - but the strike wranglings here and in Italy, plus the match-fixing delay in Turkey, have made last season seem a distant memory. Try this exclusive lighthearted quiz, set by SCOTT PYE, to see if your finger has left the pulse during the summer break.

c) The Queen’s

15. Which ex-Old Firm player joined Arles in January as a doomed swansong to his career? a) Bobo Balde b) Basile Boli c) Bomber Brown 16. Who got Joe Jordan by the throat in a disgraceful moment from the AC MilanSpurs Champions League tie? a) Rino Gattuso b) Mark van Bommel c) Peter Crouch

2. Which club stunned its fans by bringing on a 56-year-old outfield substitute for a game last October? a) Dinamo Brest b) Young Boys Bern c) Aberdeen 3. Who said: I get ‘fat head’ at Liverpool, ‘Elephant Man’ at Manchester City and ‘Mr Potato Head’ at West Brom. Is there something wrong with my head or something?” a) Steve Bruce b) Avram Grant c) Charlie Adam 4. Players in which nation were watched by a team of lip-readers to see if they broke new laws on blasphemy? a) Italy b) The Vatican c) Scotland 5. The so-called Arab Spring led to the suspension of football in which part of the world? a) North Africa b) South America c) Dundee 6. Who kindly told Roma and Italy legend

Francesco Totti on passing him at the touchline: “You’re finished, granddad.” a) Mario Balotelli b) Pippo Inzhagi c) Davie Weir 7. What did the referee do immediately after Sao Paulo goalkeeper Rogerio Ceni incredibly scored his 100th goal in March? a) Booked him b) Congratulated him c) Kissed him 8. For what unfortunate allergy was Bordeaux winger Yoan Gouffran treated in the course of the season? a) Grass b) Gherkins c) Girls 9. Which hopeless team shipped 13 goals in the second half alone in a key game in October? a) British Virgin Islands b) US Virgin Islands c) Wales 10. In which country did a keeper called Aung Aung Oo deck a ref called Phung Dung?

a) Burma b) Thailand c) Denmark 11. Which player brought up in a children’s home and who once turned out for a homeless team did Manchester United buy for £7.4m? a) Bebe b) Baby c) Booby 12. Which club went bust and dropped out of the Russian Premier League just before the start of the season? a) Saturn Moscow b) Earth Moscow c) Uranus Moscow 13. What message did Jose Mourinho send on to the pitch to Real Madrid stars Xabi Alonso and Sergio Ramos against Ajax? a) Get yourself sent off b) Get yourself a haircut c) Get yourself a girlfriend 14. Whose floodlights embarrassingly failed twice on important occasions? a) Queen Of The South’s b) Queens Park Rangers’

17. Zenit St Petersburg striker Danko Lazovic got what unusual treatment from a local cop at FC Volga when he tried to throw his shirt into the crowd? a) He zapped him with his stun gun b) He asked for his autograph c) He shot him dead 18. Stuttgart’s Ciprian Marico surprised fans at a Europa League tie with a clumsy attempt at whose famous dance to celebrate his goal? a) Michael Jackson b) Ricky Gervais c) Bez 19. Whose opening contribution to his first World Cup finals match as a halftime pundit was: “South Korea have the steering wheel.” a) Edgar Davids b) Clarence Seedorf c) Jeremy Clarkson 20. What did no St Johnstone player do for 11 consecutive league games this year? a) Score a goal b) Make a goal c) Celebrate a goal ANSWERS: The correct answer to each is a) - apart from Q20, to which the answer is a), b) and c). Any fewer than 15 correct answers and you've been in the sun too long.

1. Which key game did ref Craig Thompson have to abandon after a few minutes for fear of a full-scale riot? a) Italy v Serbia b) Rangers v Celtic c) Elche v Hercules

All systems pro as Tour final comes to Mar Menor NEXT month’s PGA EuroPro Golf Championship will be hosted by Mar Menor Golf Village. Staged from October 5 to October 7, the event is the biggest and final event of the 2011 PGA EuroPro Tour season. It will feature the top 60 players on the Order of Merit and will be only the second time the final has been held in Spain.

Arrangements were negotiated by Ivie Davies, the PGA EuroPro Tour agent here – whose ambition is to have regular European Tour events on the local Costas. Ivie, from El Raso, Guardamar, explained: “The objective of this event is to offer young world golf professionals the opportunity to gain the necessary experience and a chance to earn entry to the European Tour, as well as to prepare for the

challenge of appearing in front of a worldwide televised audience. ‘’It is also an opportunity for courses here to promote themselves and the area”. Lee Westwood, himself a former PGA EuroPro Tour player, said: “Initiatives such as this Tour are essential if the game is to continue to thrive, and the stars of the future are to be given the opportunity to shine. ‘’Out there somewhere is

a 19 year old waiting to be given a chance to demonstrate his skill and potential – just as I did”. The final is the culmination of 22 top tournaments played in the UK and the top 50 money earners will compete for a prize fund of €75,000. Celebrities from TV and sport will take part in a ProAm prior to the Final. Located near Torre Pacheco, the course will

welcome European players like Luke Goddard, Chris Hanson, Jamie Abbott and Zane Scotland

The top five players in the Order of Merit after this event will advance to next season’s Challenge Tour.


47

Friday, September 9, 2011

SPAIN 3 ENGLAND 4 Only Villarreal in doubt as Champions League battle begins STEVE BOTT’S Euro verdict SPAIN'S big four – the teams that have qualified for the Champions League group stage – all have a decent chance of progressing in the competition. In fact, three of the quartet should go through with only Real Madrid and Villarreal facing any kind of challenge to their superiority in the groups as drawn. Real's Group D looks to be the toughest, the opposition coming from Ajax Amsterdam, the always underrated Lyon and dark horses Dinamo Zagreb. Villarreal must overcome German giants Bayern Munich and Manchester City and it will be a toss up over whether the Spanish club’s experience will prevail over City's vast wealth and bank of top-quality stars. City's big problem will be whether they have gelled enough to compete effectively at the very top level. But the nature of the group matches gives them a little chance to watch and learn, spread out as they are over the next three months before Christmas. One thing is for sure, City can have no complaints about injuries hampering their chances with as many as three quality players available for EVERY position! Champions Barcelona should be shoe-ins to progress along with AC Milan in what looks the easiest of the eight groups, with Belarusians BATE Borisov and Czech debutants Viktoria Plzen their opposition.

Back to Villarreal's Group A and it really is a toss up as to who will go through. Even Napoli, the Italian challengers, cannot be taken lightly. They finished third in Serie A last season and still have most of the players who helped them achieve that at their disposal. Bayern and Villarreal had to qualify despite all their experience and that's the only question mark against City - experience as a team. Individually, City's squad has a wealth of it in the Champions League, but as a club they were last in this competition way back in the late 60s. Then, they got knocked out by T u r k s Fenerbahce, the club currently surrounded in controversy following their ejection from this season's tournament over domestic match-fixing.

At the time, Manchester United fans delighted in trumpeting City's demise by singing about their arch-rivals having " a turkey on their plates cos they can't get into Europe anymore!" It's a slightly different story 40 odd years on and the songs could be a whole lot different come May and the end of the season when the pots are handed out. Valencia, our nearest La Liga neighbours, are Spain's final contenders. They are pitted against Chelsea, Bayer Leverkusen and Belgians Genk in Group E and I take the English-Spanish partnership to go through. So cards on the table time and my last 16 are Bayern Munich and Manchester City, Inter Milan and Lille, Manchester United and Benfica, Real Madrid and Lyon, Chelsea and Valencia, Arsenal and Marseille, Porto and Shakhtar Donetsk and finally Barcelona and AC Milan. And the man I take to make a big impression in these early stages? No, not Lionel Messi, Sergio Aguero or Wayne Rooney. It's Manchester City striker Edin Dzeko (pictured), who will have a bagful of goals in all competitions by the end of the season.

THE DOOLEY VERDICT From Back Page The exotically named young threesome of Will Genia, Quade Cooper and Digby Loane will be the exciting playmakers out wide with New Zealand-born Cooper having a point to prove in his homeland. Up front lock Ben Vickerman and the world class and destructive No.7 David Pocock will be key for the Wallabies. By their standards, defending champions SOUTH AFRICA had a poor TrINations, finishing last and coming into this World Cup with an aging side averaging just under 30.

Bakkies Botha: Secondrow superstar for South Africa

This is last-chance saloon for many of these Bokka warriors, who have had an incredible run and been together for many a year. But with six key players having to be rested and kept away from contact training during the World Cup warm up, how much has a bruising TriNations taken out of this side? These Springboks managed just one victory - but it was against the mighty All Blacks, so Wales, who they face in their opening match in Wellington on Sunday (10.30am), should beware the wounded beast. The Boks have some incredible players. Captain Victor Matfield and his partner Bakkies Botha are a second row pairing that encapsulate everything that the modern-day forward should be. And the young scoring machine Patrick Lambie - at stand-off, not full back - plus the evergreen and iconic Bryan Habana give the Springboks half a chance of making it three World Cups. Finally, in this look at the biggest threats to the Home Nations, we have FRANCE, officially ranked fourth in the world rankings but runners-up to England in this year’s RBS Six Nations. Les Bleus, despite their eccentric coach Marc Lievremont, can beat anybody on their day and have the potential to cause an upset and win this World Cup. But they are inconsistent and just as likely to crash and burn at an early stage. It all hangs on which French side turns up in New Zealand. Their opening match against Japan will give us an idea on how focused they are. Lievremont has selected a strong side and promises to teach the Japanese a lesson. We will see! New Zealand, Australia,

South Africa and France will all make the knockout stages but only one of them – the All Blacks - will go through to the final. Who will they face in Auckland on October 23? I assessed the chances of the Home Nations in last week’s Courier – and whilst I believe that a side made up of the English forwards and the brilliant Welsh backs would win RWC 2011, I still think England can make it to the final. Mike Tindall’s men kick off on Sunday against Argentina in Dunedin (10.30am) – and I believe they’ll still be around on the biggest day of all. My prediction is a New Zealand v England final - with my heart obviously wanting Martin Johnson’s boys to lift the trophy. But my head tells me that the All Blacks on their home soil will be Victor Matfield: He captains Sprin gboks too hungry and too strong.

A question of support by ANDREW ATKINSON

CD Montesinos played their final pre-season friendly yesterday (Thursday) ahead of the Second Regional Division season, which kicks off with a visit to Sporting Saladar on September 18 Among the crowd at yesterday’s game against San Fulgencio were a group of former Torrevieja FC fans who quit The Torry Army to become known as The Full Monte. "The players and myself feel honoured to have these supporters here," said Montesinos manager Juanpe.

CDM lost for the first time in pre-season following three wins, when they were beaten 3-2 by Torrevieja. But Juanpe said: "I am happy with the way the pre-season games have gone.’’ Torrevieja play at a higher level - but despite the defeat Montesinos were clearly the better team." CDM will host Deportivo Orihuela at home on September 25 at the Los Miras Municipal Ground. Meanwhile the CDM Veterans are looking to play a UK Veterans side next month during the annual Los Montesinos fiesta.


Friday, September 9, 2011

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BLACK GOLD

NZ to end 20-year drought with England to make final THE DOOLEY VIEW THE long-awaited 2011 Rugby World Cup kicks off today in Auckland with host nation New Zealand taking on little Tonga. The All Blacks, ranked No.1 in the world, go into this tournament quite rightly as hot favourites. Yet if past World Cup history is anything to go by, they may yet again flatter to deceive – because they’ve managed to lift the trophy only once in six attempts. But that one and only success in 1987 was, yes, you guessed it, in their own Auckland backyard, where they kick off proceedings today. Having toured New Zealand with both England and the British Lions, I

know how difficult it is for visiting sides to achieve success in this hotbed of rugby. The country may only have a population of 4.5 million - but you can bet next month’s wages that every single man, women and child will be screaming on their rugby heroes. Coach Graham Henry has moulded a squad that has great strength in depth and plenty of experience. There’s quality everywhere - the tight front five are a challenge for any while captain Richie McCaw is as destructive as ever leading from the front. Then they have the kicking skills of stand-off Dan Carter and the centre pairing of Conrad Smith and Ma'a Nonu. The list is endless. The All Blacks will be under immense pressure and desperate to achieve success on home soil. Let’s see if they can fluff it yet again – though I am not so sure they will!

AUSTRALIA, double World Cup winners and crowned Tri-Nations champions only last week, start the tournament with a little more optimism than they had after their embarrassing defeat by Samoa in July. Ranked just below the All Blacks, they will be all out to topple their antipodean rivals from top spot when they start their campaign against Italy on Sunday. Expect an Aussie romp but the Italians’ big tight five will severely test them in the scrum. This area is one of the Wallabies’ weak points and they need to improve dramatically if they are to be serious overall contenders for the trophy. With only Ireland as a serious threat in Pool C, the Aussies will progress comfortably. Coach Robbie Deans is obviously taking the Italian opener seriously, having selected the same 15 that beat the All Blacks last week.

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