The Courier Week 44

Edition 44

www.thecourier.es

Friday, December 23, 2011

MERRY CHRISTM AS!

MEET the Dance School Academy on Page 14

IT’S CHRISTMAS at The Courier for the very first time...and we wa nt to say a huge se asonal thank-you to all our readers and advertisers for your support in 2011. In common with our rivals, we will not be publishing next week so we’d also like to wish everyone a Happy New Year and a wonderful 2012. As for The Courier, were aim ing to beat the op position out of sight in London Ol ympics year. They ’re all for the high jump, you might sa y...

HELL’S BELLS Bank meltdown rumours send expats into a panic ALARM bells are ringing throughout the expat following community reports that the UK government is drawing up emergency plans to help Britons trapped in Spain and Portugal in the event of a collapse of the euro.

Reports in the British press said plans are being put in place to help expats leave the two countries if the crisis in the eurozone sends their banks into meltdown.

The Sunday Times said that officials from the Foreign Office and the Treasury are preparing contingency plans to help thousands get home if banks in Spain and Portugal — two of the most vulnerable euro zone economies — fail and people are unable to access their money.

According to the newspaper, the Treasury confirmed that emergency plans were being drawn up but refused to give

By AMANDA BLACK details.

A Treasury spokesman said: “Of course we plan for a range of contingencies. We are not going into the specifics of what we are planning for.”

Foreign Office sources were more forthcoming, telling Sunday Times reporters that they were planning for a “nightmare scenario” with thousands of penniless Britons sleeping at airports with no money and no means of getting home.

It was reported that among the contingency plans being discussed are the sending of planes, ships and coaches to evacuate expats.

“The nuclear scenario would be having thousands of Brits stranded at the airports in Spain and Portugal with no way to get money from the cash dispenser and no way to get home.

“Who would be blamed for this? The Foreign Office,” an offi-

cial was quoted as saying in The Telegraph.

“We are looking at how we can help evacuate them if the banks in Spain and Portugal collapse, getting people cash, things like that, sending planes. We did similar things in Lebanon in 2006. We are coordinating with the Treasury.”

Around one million Britons live in Spain and approximately 50,000 in Portugal. Many are retired and living on small incomes.

The Foreign Office said it was concerned they could be cut off from their accounts if the countries’ banks called in loans.

Although Spain and Portugal have an escrow system in which customers are covered for up to 100,000 euros, the banks limit cash withdrawals so people would not be able to take all their money and leave the country.

Last month, it was reported that the Foreign Office had

Turn to Page 3

MEET miracle baby Buddy Holmes - born without a heartbeat twelve weeks prematurely and alive only because his mother, Hayley Beckman, sensed something was wrong when his kicking habits changed inside the womb.

The waters around the baby had all but dried up and doctors fought against the clock to deliver him by emergency Caesarian before he suffocated.

Hayley, daughter of Courier Editor Donna Gee, is doing well - as is her delighted partner Steve Holmes.

Buddy, who weighed in at just 992 grammes (2lb 2oz), remains in intensive care at Stepping Hill Hospital in Stockport, but is now off the critical list. And Grandma just wants to talk about the best Christmas present of her life....

CHIRPY OLD GRAN - Page 7

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Friday, December 23, 2011

I’m a happy Santa without the rain, dear TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 JUNGLE DRUMS E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 96 621 1003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 96 621 1003 616 332 178 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Therese Guardamar, La Marina, Santa pola, Gran Alacant Tel 616 332 178 Writers Donna Gee Amanda Black Sally Bengtsson Rebecca Marks Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Harold Heys Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe

Picture of the week

96 692 1003

WAVE GOODBYE! consider Spain a high No emergency EXPERTS tsunami risk - yet amazingly there is NO system in place. And NO emerplans, so Costa warning gency plan to deal with the aftermath of a major earthquake. tsunami would kill thousands, Spain warned An international meeting in Santander, attended by representatives of more than 40 countries, was told that if a quake struck like the one that killed 15,000 in Cadiz in 1755, the death toll in the Balearic Islands would be similar to that of the 2004 tsunami in Indonesia.

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LAST New Year, friends, family and customers from The Pint Depot in El Galan had a ‘Dip and Dive’ on La Zenia beach.

Participants (that’s them above) paid €5 for the privilege of wallowing in the chilly sea with the backing of a host of sponsors. Their ‘reward’ was food and drink supplied by The Pint Depot and all the money raised

Monday Sunny High Temperature: 15°C RealFeel: 14°C

was donated to Paul Cunningham Nurses.

David O'Brien, owner of The Pint Depot, has organised a repeat to welcome in 2012. Come rain, snow or sunshine, this year's Dip and Dive is at 2.30pm on La Zenia beach. All participants and spectators will be invited to raise a glass and Dippers, who must be completely sub-

And if a tsunami were to form in nothern Algeria, most of the Costa del Sol would be affected by the waves within 30 minutes.

Recent studies show that Almeria, Murcia and many parts of the Balearics would be flooded by a tsunami of only three metres in height.

Meanwhile, Lorca residents feared the worst on Monday night when a new earthquake hit the city, causing many to relive the horror of the tremor that devastated the town in May. The latest quake, which registered 2.9 on the Richter scale, caused no damage but it was feared it could be a precursor to a larger one. Emergency services immediately called a pre-alert as a precaution.

The quake came shortly before 11.30 pm at a depth of six kilometres, with the epicentre southwest of Lorca between the football stadium and the Saprelorca industrial estate. It was also felt in Puerto Lumbreras, Cehegín, Cartagena, and isome areas of Almería and Alicante.

merged - not just toe dippers - will be invited back to El Galan for a bowl of warming and traditional Irish stew.

Paul Cunningham Nurses would like to thank The Pint Depot for their support in 2011 and for supporting PCN yet again with this event. More info from Dave on 637 808 367 of email sueinthesun@hotmail.co.uk

Friday Sunny High Temperature: 18°C RealFeel: 19°C

Saturday Sunny High Temperature: 17°C RealFeel: 17°C

Sunday Partly sunny High Temperature: 17°C RealFeel: 18°C

Tuesday Sunny High Temperature: 15°C RealFeel: 16°C

Wednesday Sunny High Temperature: 17°C RealFeel: 17°C

Thursday Sunny High Temperature: 19°C RealFeel: 18°C

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Friday, December 23, 2011

A helping hand-up for handy helpers BENIMAR Social Club members do a lot of unheralded work for charity but get little recognition, according to their representative Bob Harlow.

In a touching email to The Courier, he said: “The reason I am writing is to ask if you would include us in your paper for an acknowledgement to the members for the good work we do for two different charities - EMAUS and DEBRA, the butterfly children.

“We collect on a regular basis for EMAUS for toys and gifts for the Xmas period - and we have just presented to the

DEBRA shop at La Marina, a cheque for 125 euros from a raffle at our club Xmas dinner, ‘’We are a small friendly club started ten years ago. We meet every Wednesday at The Steak House (formerly Tyler's bar) in Rojales at 7 30pm. New members get a warm reception and are very welcome.

“If you could find a small space for us, it would be good. If not, we wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.’’

Our pleasure to oblige, Bob. And season’s greetings to all at Benimar Social Club from The Courier.

OH DIA! CHEAP MENU BAN FOR FOREIGNERS

By MICKY TAYKE A SPANISH government department has announced a new law that will prevent restaurants selling menú del días to foreign tourists.

Instead, foreigners will have to order more expensive a la carte meals.

Aimed at increasing restaurant takings, and therefore tax revenue, the move is just one of a raft of measures to boost tourist income being looked at by a new government department, the Departamento Santos Inocentes.

But critics have slammed the change, due to come into effect next Wednesday, as it will not only hit tourists but also many foreigners living in Spain who will have to prove they are resident to be able to order menú del día.

Abril Tonto of action group Foreigners Overseas Out Loud (FOOL) said: “This is an outrageous ploy to get more money out of innocent foreigners who have shown commitment to Spain by buying property or spending their hard-earned holiday money here.”

However, Departamento Santos Inocentes spokesperson, Armando Follon, defended the move.

“We understand it may cause a little inconvenience for foreigners living here as they will not have the Spanish ID cards that will be required to order the cheap menus,” said Follon.

“But there will be provision for foreign residents to continue enjoying the menus if they provide their NIE, show their original residence certificate and provide up-to-date proof of fiscal residency from the tax office before ordering.”

People with holiday homes in Spain who are not resident will no longer be able to order menú del día.

Follon defended the new law against accusations that it

was discriminatory by explaining that the menú del día was originally introduced by Franco so that Spanish workers could buy a cheap midday meal.

“It was never intended for the foreign visitors but is now virtually all foreigners buy in Spanish restaurants,” said Follon.

“This is costing the restaurant industry and the exchequer billions every year. While the economy was buoyant we could turn a blind eye, but now that we are in the midst of economic crisis the time has come to put a stop to foreigners buying cheap meals intended for Spanish workers.”

Follon denied claims that that were killed went to heaven as the he personally had a grudge first Christian martyrs. Even so, there’s a touch of the gallows humour about Día against foreigners, saying “Soy inocente” (I am innode los Santos Inocentes.

The media traditionally gets in on the cent). joke, with many spoof stories appearing.

When asked why the new In recent years stories have included rules were being rushed reports that Zapatero and Rajoy were through, Follon would only joining forces to create one big political party to deal with the crisis, that the gov- say that the date December ernment minister for equality was getting 28 was very significant, and rid of public toilets because of the sexist that all Spanish people would signs for ‘ladies’ and ‘gentlemen’, and understand. that Tom Cruise was opening a scientol“Foreigners should consult ogy centre in Madrid. their Spanish neighbours if In Mexico, one paper reported that ladies’ man Tiger Woods, was bringing they need more explanation,” out a new sexual aid drug called Tiagra. he said.

Innocent or guilty, this joke could be on you BE very careful on December 28 in Spain as it is the Día de los Santos Inocentes (Day of the Innocents), the Spanish and Latin American equivalent of April Fools’ Day. If you fall victim to a joke on this day, instead of April fool, the prankster will shout: ‘Inocente, inocente’.

Curiously, the day observes King Herod’s ordering of all baby boys under two in Bethlehem to be killed because he wanted to destroy Jesus before he became a rival.

The trick was that Jesus was hidden from Herod, and so the tradition of playing tricks on that day grew.

Slightly inappropriate, but this is excused by the belief that all the babies

Expat panic over ‘bank meltdown’ From Page One asked embassies and consulates for contingency plans for rioting and social unrest in countries most affected by the eurozone crisis.

However, the British Embassy in Madrid played down the plans, saying there was no specific Spain or Portugal evacuation proposal.

A spokesman for the Embassy said: “All British Embassies regularly update contingency planning for all sorts of scenarios, including natural disasters and internal political unrest.

“There is no Spain (or Portugal) contingency plan for a euro-based evacuation, nor do we have any intention of preparing one. ‘‘It is fanciful to imagine that a major evacuation of British nationals would either be necessary or feasible.”

Missing boy found dead A 15-year-old boy who had disappeared in Alfàs del Pi was found dead last Thursday - four days after he went missing.

Joel Otazu is thought to have met an accidental death.

Civil Guard divers found his body submerged in the

sea near the ochre mines in the Serra Gelada natural park, close to where his sweater had been found the previous day.

Joel disppeared after deciding to take a walk while his parents were preparing dessert after Sunday lunch.

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Friday, December 23, 2011

Caging young oiks is dearer than the Ritz

FANCY a night at the Ritz Hotel in London, costing as much as £650?

While most of us can't afford anything like that and hunt for a cheap room at a Travelodge or Holiday Inn, it costs a staggering £860.40 a night to keep a young offender on remand in a secure unit. And that’s thanks to successive barmy governments who privatised the custody service.

Not surprisingly, charities have condemned as outrageous the astronomic cost of locking up young oiks.

Figures have shown that the £156.16 daily cost of a youth remanded to a staterun institution is five times less expensive than a private unit.

Teenagers are sent to secure units if they are considered "vulnerable" or too young for standard youth prisons.

To me it all smacks of typical modernday namby-pambying of trouble-makers.

It takes far too long to bring people to trial because of pussy-footing about by lawyers and court officials - and an incredible amount of money could be saved if the process was speeded up.

Vast amounts of cash could also be saved by commissioning an old ship or two and converting them into prisons. Or better still, use the army to run workcamp prisons to train oiks in a trade.

And if all else fails, we could always put them up at the Ritz- as our wonderful British do-gooders would no doubt suggest!

WE all know that Christmas costs a fortune - brought about because people go spending crazy. Peer pressure has a lot to do with it, coupled with the demands of children and the need to ensure that you buy something meaningful (another word for expensive) for a loved one - or you won't hear the end of it for months!

A CARVE-UP AT TESCO… Traders know all too well that many of us leave our brains at home when we go Christmas shopping and will try to pull the wool over our eyes, pretending that something is a bargain when they know only too well it isn't.

Top prize this year must go to Tesco where extra large frozen turkeys have been on sale for £25 - marked half price.

Problem is that other supermarkets had the same weight turkeys at around the same price, without a discount.

Clever (or perhaps not so clever this time) Tesco reduced their turkeys from £50 to £25, while the equivalent bird in Asda was £24. Traders are supposed to sell their products for the higher price for at least 28 days before using that price as a benchmark for any reduction.

Tesco say they complied with the rule by offering the

Another thing I applaud Cameron for is his view that there should be some "reward" for marriage in the tax system. He believes this would send out a clear message that the government and society value marriage.

It's a great idea, and it just might make a few people think twice about divorcing if they knew they would be hit in their pockets even harder than divorcees are now.

It’s a shame the Lib Dems are totally opposed to the idea.

LAW OF THE SOPPY JUDGE

turkey at the full £50 price during the summer - but that was when few people would have wanted a huge frozen turkey.

Watch out in the January sales for items which seem too good to be true. Probably they're not!

PUTTING OTHERS FIRST HATS off to David Cameron for suggesting, in a recent speech, that Britain should return to Christian values as a way to halt the moral decline of the country.

There's little argument that Britain has been in a moral decline for years - you see it in the streets of towns and cities every weekend when alcohol-fuelled teenagers and 20somethings go on the rampage.

You see it in people’s homes when parents fail to instil any moral discipline, and you see it in school classrooms because teachers can no longer do what was the accepted norm in my days - a clip around the ear, a taste of the ruler or the cane.

Cameron says the riots in Britain, the ridiculous greed in the City financial institutions, the misuse of expenses by MPs and terrorism caused in the West by Muslim extremists is all part of the same problem - the decline of moral values.

He wants British people to learn (or remember) right from wrong and follow a code enshrined in Christian principles.

It's a follow-on from his "big society" idea where citizens actually think of others as well as themselves.

Just imagine how much better society would be if people actually did think of other people instead of putting self first.

Now that's a New Year resolution worth following.

AND now for the news items which got me all steamed up this week...I bet they have the same effect on you.

The first involves a 54-year-old asylum seeker from the Congo who raped a woman and dumped his victim on a rubbish tip when he was "finished" with her.

Sounds like a really charming person, someone not even the most crazy British dogooders would want to help stay in the UK (I hope).

But guess what? After he had served his eight-year sentence, some twits in the Home Office thought it a wonderful idea to allow him to marry his long-term partner and as a result, some soppy judge thought that was a good enough reason for him to remain in the UK. OK, this dreadful man will be electronically tagged and under close supervision (at more expense to the taxpayer) until an appeal is heard against the soppy judge's ruling.

Let's hope then he'll be sent packing.

The second case involves a 20-year-old woman who was gagged and tied up by her 30-year-old husband and then had all five fingers of her right hand cut off.

Why? Because she had decided to pursue a course in higher education without his permission.

No, not something that has happened in Britain, it was in Bangladesh where it is still customary for a woman to be the property of the husband.

Women in Britain should remember that not all men from the Indian sub-continent are "westernised" and they could end up becoming little more than servants.

The 20-year-old woman was unable to have her fingers sewn back because a relative of the attacker threw them away. She is now trying to learn to write with her left hand.

Her husband is in custody awaiting trial and human rights activists are demanding a harsh sentence. I wholeheartedly agree...what would you like to chop off?

Finally, I hope you have enjoyed my rants on all manner of subjects during 2011. In the next issue of The Courier, I shall try to look ahead and give a few predictions for 2012. .

Until then, I and my better half hope you will all do your very best to enjoy a great Christmas - despite everything!

PHARMACISTS IN NEW STRIKE

AENA seek a peace bridge

STRIKE action saw pharmacies across the Valencian region shut on Monday and Tuesday as the Department of Health failed to make an agreed payment to clear the backlog of money owed for prescription charges.

According to the agreed timetable for the debt clearance, the money should have been paid on December 10. When it was not forthcoming, strike action was triggered.

A third day of action was narrow-

AENA may be showing signs of backing down in its row with Ryanair over the use of passenger bridges at El Altet airport.

After last week’s announcement by Ryanair chief Michael O’Leary that he is slashing by half the budget airline’s flights from the airport, AENA has said it will put forward a compromise solution.

Instead of the bridges, AENA will propose the airline uses buses to disembark its passengers.

ly averted when the Health Department stumped up 60 million euros on Tuesday.

Pharmacies in the region are still owed 490 million euros by the Department of Health.

During the strike only 73 pharmacies remained open in the Alicante region, and long queues formed from early morning until late night as they struggled to cope with demand.

Protests to support the strike action were held in Alicante on

Tuesday, with around 2,000 people taking to the streets. Banners read, ‘Where is the money from the government? Patients come first.’

The Department of Health denied that it was strike pressure that forced the payment, saying it was paid when government money became available. A lack of liquidity was blamed for the late payment.

Under the schedule of payments a further 60 million euros is due by the end of the month.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Meet our new columnist...

CANADIAN-BORN Jeanette Erath moved to the UK at a very young age.

She studied performing arts at college and wrote many scripts, as well as acting and working behind the scenes.

Now 40, she still has an interest in the arts and performing, though no time to pursue it.

She grew up in Weston-super-Mare before moving to London and, at 22, joining the Metropolitan Police, where she worked for 13 years before coming to Spain in 2005.

During her time in the police, she studied creative writing and wrote as a freelance for various publications including the police newspaper. A keen reader, she particularly enjoys the classics.

Jeanette has been a single mum for the past two years due to her ex-partner’s threatening behaviour and violence. He has since left the country, and these days, most of Jeanette’s free time is taken up with her young son and improving her Spanish. She also helps out at a charity shop in Almoradí and helps friends to learn the language.

She has travelled around Spain, visiting Madrid, Barcelona and surrounding areas and the Costa Del Sol. “I wanted to experience life, not just live,’’ she says. “love Spain and it is definitely where I call home.’’

In her new weekly column, she reflects on her experiences as a single parent in a foreign country.

FOLLOWING THE DREAM SO, I´ve arrived. The sun is glistening on the tarmac, there is a slight, warm breeze and the smell is clean and fresh. I pull my sunglasses over my eyes to quell the glare and make my way slowly down the plane steps.

The fresh, air conditioned airport foyer is a welcome respite from the heat. Bags collected, I head out into the frantic masses, there is no one to meet me though, I am doing this on my own. My eyes dart around looking for the signs for hire cars, hoping that there will be something written in English.

As I pass the waiting crowds the sign I am looking for is there, I recognise the company I hired the car with, and I silently thank the stars that they speak English.

As I drive out into the busy roads, I find myself straight onto the motorway, ‘drive on the right´ keeps going through my head, as cars whizz past on the left.

It all seems so strange, so alien, but I concentrate and, with a good map, eventually find my destination.

As I check into the motel, my thoughts drift to family and friends back in the UK, how brave they think I am to be here, to make the move so far away all on my own. Maybe they have a slight point, I allow myself to think. I did have a good job; a career for life, which these days are few and far between, but I felt stuck, I was in a rut and needed an escape.

This was it.

The next few weeks pass in a whirl, they are spent doing so many things, getting my paperwork, i.e. NIE; buying a car (I decided to buy from a garage for ease and a bit of security); checking out the local shops and supermarkets; registering with the doctor; registering that I live here at the town hall; looking for work. And finally, but maybe most importantly for anyone emigrating to a new country, I started making friends.

Finally, the enjoyment began, summers spent on the beaches and some of the spring, autumn and winter too, driving at any time of day on almost clear motorways and roads, drinking a glass or two of wine in the middle of the day, siestas and fiestas, this is the life.

Time here passes so quickly and I now find myself six years down the line but still loving it as much as the day I arrived.

I wouldn´t say the last six years have been easy, I have had several jobs, made many and lost a few friends, fallen in and out of love, even had a baby here and been left as a single mother. But,all in all, I wouldn´t change a thing.

At the moment, Spain is my home. I wouldn´t have my life any other way. It´s not for everyone, I´ve met people who love it here like me and those who just couldn´t settle, but one thing we all have in common is that we gave it a go, we followed our dream.

And whatever your dream is, you too can follow it.

“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them”…Walt Disney I am a female freelance writer here on the Costa Blanca and will be looking at life in Spain from a woman´s viewpoint on a regular basis here in The Courier.

I have certainly had a colourful time in Spain which my articles will reflect to interest and maybe even help you.

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Friday, December 23, 2011

One more fun lunch in the bag

Not-so-wise men come seeking help IN TRUE Christmas style the Easy Horse Care Rescue Centre, Rojales, had a visit from three wise men last week, seeking help with a rescued mule.

The brothers had found the mule on a roundabout and walked him 10km to their building plot in Catral.

They contacted the police but the owner couldn’t be found so the men were left to care for the mule.

And when the animal fell sick, they contacted EHCRC. The mule is now settled in a quarantine stable at the rescue centre and is being treated by horse vet Dorothea for a mystery illness.

Said Sue Weeding from EHCRC: “We are not sure of his history but he has had a hard life judging by his arthritis. He’s lovely, a gentle giant.”

The mule, who has been named Dexter, will only eat carrots and apples and EHCRC are asking for donations of food for him.

For more information visit www.easyhorsecare.net or call Sue on 652 021 980.

THE Ladies who Lunch (LWL) December meeting was held at Stan and Ollie’s Restaurant on El Raso earlier this month with a full pre-Christmas celebration laid on very professionally by Paul and his happy staff.

Entertainment was provided by Tony Kelly and the whole afternoon passed far too quickly for the ladies.

Thanks to everyone who made the event a success, including members and guests, €547.36 was raised for Paul Cunningham Nurses (PCN).

Sarah Plant and Susie McCrossan, two of the

Bagging a bargain with gift from lunch ladies lead nurses from the charity, attended the lunch to show the members the fully equipped medical bags they had purchased for PCN. Members were very impressed both by the size

and content of the bags.

The nurses were accompanied by Karen Mountfield who is a regular volunteer and administrator in the La Marina Office of PCN. Janine Williams, the

founder of LWL presented thank you gifts to six members who had worked hard throughout the year. For details of LWL contact Janine on 966 261 359 or Maddie Pinfold on 966 078 646.

CHARITY BEGINS AT SCHOOL

Here are 1632 reasons why

PUPILS of King’s College Murcia have been showing the real spirit of Christmas - by raising a cool €1,632 for charity in just two weeks.

They’ve done it through the sale of Christmas cards designed by pupils, carol-singing concerts in the streets of Cartagena and Murcia, a fabulous Christmas fayre and the call for donations towards an orphanage in Gandia.

As well as raising money, the youngsters also brought in, by the bagful, new slippers for the orphanage children, along with nearly new toys, clothes and shoes.

So many gifts were donated that they only just fitted into the back of the car in which Asli Silk, the headmaster’s wife, personally delivered the items and money to the orphanage.

The orphanage is actually a refuge run by Sister Amelia, for children aged between tthree and 12, who for one reason or another cannot live at home.

Some have parents who are very sick, while others have mothers and fathers in prison, or working away in another country.

Sister Amelia came to Spain from Paraguay at the age of 20 to help run the orphanage, and nine years later is still here. She describes the children as her family.

The rooms are all spotlessly clean and very organised.

The children have a lovely garden with swings and an area to play in, and a TV room for when the weather’s bad.

They go to stay with family members at the weekends, but many prefer to stay with the nuns, who provide them with a safe place to live and with love and understanding.

The orphanage, El Preventorio Infantil Ntra Sra Del Amparo, is home to 55 children at present. They also attend school there, a facility which is kept going through donations and volunteers.

The orphanage started out in a tumbledown house in

Asli Silk with Sister Amelia at the orphanage

1953, but since then all sorts of good Samaritans have helped maintain and improve the installations. The centre now has two floors of bedrooms, eight classrooms, a swimming pool, a sports hall, a pleasant garden, a dining area and a multi-purpose room.

The children live a reasonable life, but when Christmas comes around they are not as fortunate as many other children, although they do receive some presents from charities.

These, along with donations from local clubs and other organisations, make their Christmas a lot merrier.

THE spirit of Christmas was present in abundance at Cheers Bar in Villamartin when Sylvia Hackett won the last prize of the evening in the raffle held in aid of Paul Cunningham Nurses.

Sylvia very generously gave the prize back to be drawn again.

Another lucky winner,

Caron Priest, won a meal for two at Stan & Ollies in El Raso.

Our picture shows, Caron (front left) and Sylvia (right).

Also in the photograph is energetic volunteer Jennie Lowe, giving Jon Summer, the MC and singer for the evening, a thank-you kiss.

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Friday, December 23, 2011

BIRTH OF A BUDDY MIRACLE

Merry Christmas, everybody.

I’ve already had my present!

He’s only alive because of his mum’s intuition. Born 10 weeks early with no heartbeat, he weighs less than a kilo. Meet my new grandson

I’M not exactly new to grandparenthood, if that’s the right word.

Up to last Wednesday my two daughters had their hands full with a handful of kids between them. Five, that is...or two and a half of each if the eldest got her way and was allowed to chop her despised cousin Charlie in two.

The two boys and three girls range in age from 20 down to five but all have one thing in common. They came into the world normally and were lucky enough to arrive healthy and complete.

So when my elder daughter Hayley found she was expecting, everyone assumed all would go well. I know she’s 41 and it’s 12 years since her second daughter, Daisy, was born. But all progressed normally right up to the 28th week – with Hayley and her partner Steve Holmes focused entirely on the scheduled arrival of a son in early March.

Then, 197 days into Hayley’s third pregnancy, came a remarkable – and frightening – development triggered by the smallest hint that something was wrong.

Last Wednesday, the embryo child all but stopped booting hell out of Hayley’s body from the inside. She sensed that something was amiss, and although her midwife was not unduly concerned, the worried couple wanted to be sure.

A surreal scenario followed, with Hayley and Steve acting purely on intuition and forking out £100 for a private consultation with a paediatric not much specialist.

Handyman: Buddy is He sent them immediately ordered and the baby was doctors and nurses united in to hospital, where a scan plucked, lifeless, from a battle to give life to the tiny revealed that the waters Hayley’s body with the umbil- foetus. For Hayley and around the baby had all but ical cord wrapped tightly Steve, those three minutes dried up. Fearing the tot around his neck. translated into a lifetime of would not survive in this sea The little one had no heart- lifelessness. of nothingness, an urgent beat and was not breathing.

As the seconds ticked Caesarian section was For fully three minutes, away, they named the baby Buddy, desperate that he should have a proper identity, even if he was never to draw breath.

Then, his tiny body invaded by a host of canulas, tubes and ventilators, a miraThe Broadband and Telephone Company cle occured. The mite’s heart began to beat.

Buddy was alive...if not

966 784 532

died inside her within two hours.

Over the next few days, Buddy went from strength to strength. He was two days old by the time I arrived in Manchester for my Christmas visit. Hayley was waiting for me in hospital reception...there were predictably lots of tears as we embraced.

With Hayley approaching her 42nd birthday, the chance of her conceiving again after a complicated Caesarean is remote, to say the least.

And with Steve’s only previous marriage childless, this was his probably his only chance to fulfil his dream of fatherhood.

So they desperately needed Buddy to be a survivor… and judging by his neversay-die attitude throughout his first week of life, he’s bionically indestructable.

After four days on the critical list in Intensive Care, he was reclassified hand at five days old bigger than Hayley’s as merely ‘vulnerakicking. All 992 grammes of ble’. By the time you him (or a tad under 2lb 2oz if read this, he’ll probably be doing aeroyou don’t do metric).

For 24 hours, his under- bics in his cosy developed lungs were helped incubator with its by a ventilator. Then another vivid blue light. miracle; he started breathing With his sensitive by himself. skin and distorted And another miracle, he grimaces, there’s scored 8 out of 10 in an offi- something unearthcial health check – a ly about my sixth respectable score for a full- grandchild. He was term baby, let alone a barely- not meant to leave the comfort of his formed Bud. Amazingly, doctors told the human spaceship relieved parents that had until early March Hayley not gone to the pedi- and at less than one atrician, the baby would have third of the weight of

Definitely looks like his Dad!

the typical new-born, I could easily confuse him with ET. Particularly when my specs aren’t around.

It’s wonderful that, with his future now all but secured, I can joke about which planet the little fella came from. All of which leaves both Hayley and me in stitches.

Only mine don’t hurt.

8

Friday, December 23, 2011

9

Friday, December 23, 2011

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Shame on our rude, racist hosts THIS is for the attention of the rather glib José Alverez Muñoz, who wrote a letter of complaint about the misspelling of the word cheque in one of your editions.

I think his time would be better spent looking at the abundance of horrific translations into English made by his fellow Spaniards.

In restaurants, billboards and even official governmental documents, you can see translations that are so bad they are hardly comprehensible.

This is most likely due to the fact that Spanish CEOs have the policy of only hiring Spanish people, even if it means that a job will

not be done properly. It is so typical of a Spanish person to think of himself as superior to a Brit, when in reality the only things they excel at are sport, salsa and sunshine.

I beg your pardon, I am not racist but after ten years of living here, I have had enough of the rude and racist behaviour of my host countrymen.

I am a European and for the moment have full rights to everything that the Spanish person has, but sadly, as we read on a regular basis, this is not the case.

Translate that, José.

MAUREEN, Algorfa

ALL BOXED UP: FAITH, HOPE AND CHARITY Church’s presents give orphans a Christmas to look forward to

JUST before Christmas a number of shoe boxes filled with presents were given to the boxes were subsequently Concern La Siesta, The charity Caritas and the taken by Caritas for distribu- Women's Fellowship Group, orphanage at Elche. tion to children known to Greenlands Bowls Club and

In the box seat, from left, are Pam Heath, Karen, Sara from the Emaus orphanage, and Gillian Spiers

Once again the generosity of people gives one great faith that all is not bad in the world today.

The 'Shoe Box' appeal, instigated three years ago by Pam Heath and Gillian Spiers from the Anglican church at La Siesta, resulted in 162 shoe boxes of presents being donated.

The gifts will go to children who, through no fault of their own, would more than likely have received nothing this Christmas. This year, 31 boxes of this type were delivered to the orphanage in Elche, run by charity Emaus.

These particular boxes were for named children, including many teenagers, not usually included in past appeals.

The remaining boxes were taken to the Inmaculada church in Torrevieja and were blessed during the International Mass held after the 'Carols in the Square' last Friday, December 16. The

After the promises, time to deliver

THE true measure of a politician or a political party is how well they deliver on their promises made publicly in their election manifestos.

Before the local elections in 2007 CLARO election manifesto promised to save Cala Mosca and to separate

Orihuela Costa from the Orihuela town hall.

That was almost five years ago and I would like Mr. Houliston of CLARO to tell us what progress they have made towards achieving these two main promises in the last five years?

JOHN CARROLL

Houliston: Questions

them.

The filled shoe boxes were donated by a whole range of individuals, including members of La Siesta Anglican church and also from the Anglican churches of Los Balcones and Lago Jardin.

Additionally, members of the local branch of The Royal Air Forces Association, Age

Karen from Garbo's hairdressers in San Luis, plus many individuals who just wanted to be part of this appeal. Without doubt, if they could, every child receiving one of these gifts would say a massive ‘THANK YOU for thinking of us.'

BRUCE HEATH for La Siesta Anglican Church

The Costa must clean up its act IS it my imagination or has Orihuela Costa become dirtier in the last six months?

I see nobody sweeping or cleaning. There is much more rubbish, graffiti and ugly posters than before.

The streets are dirtier especially close to bins and bottle banks.

Many people voted CLARO as a protest against the established parties but now I bet they are wondering if CLARO are all talk and no action.

They cannot even keep the place clean.

PETER KING

Poo! What a strange looking dish, Alfonsa I LOVE Alfonsa's recipes. I have made a few of them and they have been a great success.

One thing does concern me though. A couple of weeks ago, there was an illustration of the "cocido" recipe.

I'm sure I wasn't the only one who noticed that the photograph looked suspiciously like a dog had done it’s business in the middle of the meal!

Not the most appetising of illustrations, certainly.

However, I did try the dish and it was absolutely delicious.

Alfonsa’s page is fantas-

Dog’s dinner: The picture that offended Val Horner tic and I'm thoroughly enjoying making authentic spanish dishes.

Long may it carry on, but please have a word with your illustrator. Oh,

and thank Alfonsa for sharing her culinary knowledge. Yours enthusiastically.

VAL HORNER, Gran Alacant

10

I attended my grandson's third birthday party at our local community centre the other day.

There were tears, tantrums, hysterics and general havoc.

A shaken Mrs S commented afterwards: 'In all my years I have never witnessed such disgraceful behaviour.'

I smiled. 'That's the way it goes with young folk, luv.

They can become like feral animals when they don't get their way.

'That's why they have to grow up with grown-ups so that we can set a fine example and show them how to be civilised.'

Mrs S glared at me. 'Who said anything about the children behaving badly? It's YOU I'm disgusted with.

'You ruined my darling grandson's party. Those tots would have ended up in tears if I hadn't dragged you out of there.'

'Me?' I queried incredulously. 'What did I do? It was that feller who kept sticking his oar in. Who was he anyway?'

Mrs S shook her head. 'Do you mean the chap you threatened to report to the manager of the community centre?'

'Yeah, that's the bloke.'

'That WAS the community centre manager.'

I thought that at this point a change of subject might be appropriate. 'Would you care to listen to the shipping forecast on the radio, my love?'

'What!' Mrs S said. 'Oh, I get it. You can't even change the subject with any degree of skill or subtlety, can you?'

'I try my best,' I sulked.

Mrs S stared at me until I removed the thumb from my mouth.

'My mother was right,' my missus said. 'Mum always

Friday, December 23, 2011

A JAW-DROPPING OCCASION maintained that any man who proposed marriage the way you did was bound to be a disappointment.

I bet you can't even remember the day we got engaged.'

I scratched my head, desperately trying to recall that momentous occasion. But it was no good. The memory just wouldn't come.

I waited until Mrs S disappeared into the kitchen to make phone calls of apology on my behalf to the adults who had been at our grandson's birthday celebration.

Figuring that she would be away some time, I headed upstairs and climbed into the loft. Searching through every one of my old diaries I finally found what I was looking for - an entry for September 10th, 1969.

Brushing thick cobwebs from the page, I memorised the contents of that relevant section of scribble.

Panting with the exertion of it all I went back downstairs and waited for Mrs S to return to the living room.

I conjured up a pained expression and plastered it across my face. 'You really

that Antarctica is the only continent without reptiles or snakes?'

Mrs S again failed to rise to the bait of a new topic.

'I'LL tell YOU how you proposed marriage to me. You suggested that we should -and I quote -- creosote life's fence together.

'How romantic was THAT?' she went on (and on).

'My mother was tutting with disbelief as she eavesdropped at the parlour door.

'Let me tell you something, blockhead. George Clooney you are not.'

Before I could mount a vigorous defence (or even think of one) I was saved by the bell. There was someone at and non-geographic numbers (0845, the front door.

0870 etc.). Other services include laminating, copying and sale of English greetings cards.

In our workshop Richard, a Microsoft qualified MCSA, will repair your laptop, notebook or desktop and upgrade, optimise, remove viruses etc. He’ll also create a website or add pages.

Advice is given freely, with a "no fix, no fee" policy. Call-outs within Gran Alacant are also free; you only pay for work done.

We also rent out secure mail boxes and receive post and parcels as well as items sent by courier. Our laundry service will take care of your bed linen, duvets and towels and we have car seats, high chairs, buggies and cots for hire. We are continually expanding our range of services so please pop in and have a look... soon. upset me before, my love,' I said, forcing a sob.

'Did you really think I could ever forget the day I asked for your hand? It was the 10th of September, 1969, a day that will forever be etched in my memory.'

Mrs S said: 'Hmm. At least you remember the date. But how exactly did you propose?'

Lummy, I thought, how the hell should I know? I never wrote down the exact words in my diary.Time to change the subject again.

'Did you know, my love,

Gran Alicante Services/Sol Computers GRAN Alacant Services is a family business which has served th area for the last six years from its office and workshop in Av. Escandinavia, opposite the Health Centre.

We provide internet facilities from our six work stations, using high speed 10 meg broadband. Check emails, surf the web, book flights etc. at very reasonable rates. Boarding cards etc. can be printed out on our two networked printers.

We also have a fax machine and two phone booths where you can call the UK and worldwide, including UK Freephone

'Good afternoon, young sir,' I greeted the stranger standing on my step. 'And how may I be of service to you?'

'Knock it off, Dad!' the visitor replied. 'Your bouts of selective amnesia don't work any more.'

'Sorry, Son,' I mumbled. 'But I reckoned it was worth a try.

Anyway, don't be a stranger. Come on in.'

'So tell me, Dad, how come your grandson's birthday party started off in Bury but ended up in Bedlam?'

I shrugged my guilty shoulders. 'It was that snotty man who runs the place.

He claimed that the music I was playing for the Pass the Parcel game was inappropriate.

'I tried to adopt a philosophical attitude but it just didn't happen. And that's when it all kicked off. Of course I'll borrow the money from your mother to pay for any damage.'

My son sighed. 'Dad, you could have chosen Wheels on the Bus or even the Thomas the Tank Engine song to heighten the kiddies' fun.

'But I ask you . . . the theme from Jaws? Even the mums and dads were looking

a bit twitchy.

'And why was there no eventual Pass the Parcel winner? ‘Because the kids were too scared to remove that last piece of wrapping. And all because of your idiotic choice of music, Dad.' I put my head in my hands.

'What can I possibly do to make amends, Son?' I groaned.

'He can get lost for a start!'

I heard Mrs S call from the other room.

My son must have felt sorry for his wretched father for he reached out and gave me a consoling hug.

'Do me a favour, Dad,' he urged, patting me on the back.

'At next year's party will you consider passing the parcel duties to somebody else?'

'But I have to be entrusted with something,' I pleaded.

'It's my grandson's big day.'

'Okay then,' nodded my boy. 'You can always assume the mantle of cloakroom attendant.'

'Consider it already done, Son,' I pledged. 'After all, when it comes to reaching decisions there are no flies on me.'

My son released me from his arms and examined his grubby hands.

'There may be no flies on you, Dad, but were you aware that you're covered in cobwebs?'

Friday, December 23, 2011

Cigarette smuggling crackdown BRITISH expats are being offered cash rewards for information about suspected tobacco smugglers.

The HM Revenue & Customs campaign aims to clamp down on illegal imports of cigarettes to Spain – many of which come via the Gibraltar border.

Around 225 million cigarettes and several tonnes of tobacco destined for the UK have been seized in Spain over the last year.

“We hope the public will help us come down hard on the smugglers and fraudsters who cheat the rest of us by not making their full contribution to the cost of public

services,” said an HMRC spokesman.

“These people are criminals who we want to catch.”

Email: customs.hotline@hmrc.gov.uk

Dip into the den

A 40-YEAR-OLD man who hurled himself into the lions' den at a zoo in Madrid miraculously escaped being eaten alive.

The Casa del Campo safari park, part of the capital's Aquarium Zoo, said animal carers were alerted by a visitor who saw the man suddenly leap into a pen to join the three Atlas lions who live there, for no apparent reason.

He is said to have climbed the fence and then dived into a water tank a metre deep.

Staff immediately rushed to the scene, where they found the

man apparently unhurt, although drenched to the skin.

He was taken to Madrid's Hospital Clínico by a mobile intensive care unit on site.

Paramedics said the man appeared to have some kind of mental illness and that, upon arrival at the hospital, was admitted to the psychiatric unit.

Management at the zoo have reported the matter to the police.

‘GROPER’ BRIT FACES EIGHT YEARS IN JAIL A BRITISH man is facing eight years behind bars after allegedly groping a woman while she slept during a camping holiday.

The events occurred five years ago when the victim was in La Herradura with a male friend, who had invited along a second man she had not previously met.

After staying up until just after midnight, the three went to sleep in the same tent – but in separate sleeping bags – with the accused man lying in the middle.

The victim allegedly woke up at 4.15am to find the accused man, a 32-year-old, touching her genitals.

The trial will take place on December 20 at Granada’s provincial court.

11

12

Friday, December 23, 2011

THE SPANISH PRESS

PM plans cuts of 16.5 billion El Pais MARIANO RAJOY was sworn in as the new prime minister of Spain this week - and finally revealed some of the policies he hopes will kick start Spain’s economy.

would be making drastic cuts in the public welfare system and social policies. "So when are we going to get the bad news?" Rubalcaba asked during the debate. The Socialist leader accused Rajoy of "knowing where the cuts" will be made but declining for now to say where.

The Socialists weren't alone in criticising Rajoy for being vague on his plans.

Josep Antoni Durán Lleida, spokesman for the Catalan nationalist CiU bloc - the third-largest political force in parliament - accused Rajoy of purposely "keeping quiet" about his measures and not releasing too many details.

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La Verdad CORVERA Airport appears to be getting closer and closer to completion.

The building work is finished, as is the runway and control tower. The finishing touches are now coming to an end, with the whole area being cleaned, and equipment being tested.

But the hardest part may be acquiring permission for test flights to take place.

The airport faces another setback as no fewer than 510 workers from San Javier airport are denouncing the silence of AENA about their future.

There is no set date for the closure of San Javier airport to commercial traffic, and hundreds of people still hold out the hope that both airports will be able to function together.

Negotiations were put on hold until the new national government took over, so things may start moving again shortly.

Mariano Rajoy: Planning changes

He announced a freezing of public-sector jobs, along with plans to move all public holidays to Mondays, stop early retirements and to cut the deficit by 16.5 billion euros, as part of his grand plan to move Spain out of its deep economic crisis.

These were the biggest pledges the Popular Party (PP) leader made for the next four years during his investiture speech, which was delivered to Congress on Monday morning. The only increase in spending, he said, would be in pensions, which will be brought up to date with the consumer price index from January 1.

The new prime minister, who has kept the plans of his incoming government close to his chest since winning the November 20 election, predicted that Spain's exit from Zapatero: Quiet life the crisis would be guaran"I am willing to hear proteed by the cuts, as well as by fulfilling the country's posals from everybody but I think that the priorities should commitments to Europe.

The austerity drive intro- be to concentrate on ecoduced by the outgoing gov- nomic growth and job creernment of José Luis ation," Rajoy said.

Socialist leader Alfredo Rodríguez Zapatero involved savings of just 10 billion Pérez Rubalcaba warned euros. that the new PP government

Take-off close but no plane sailing at Corvera

than more sentimental been d ha , ue val y tar ne mo for on the statue´s wrist y. tur cen a lf ha tIt was originally dona local a by h ris pa the to ed family.

Rosa Díez, of the Unión Progreso y Democracia, also said that Rajoy's proposed measures are very ambiguous. "He didn't dedicate any time to reflect on the political crisis," she said.

United Left (IU) coalition director Cayo Lara said his group will vote against all the measures Rajoy plans on introducing. Lara began his speech by attacking the outgoing Socialist government and said he didn't "expect anything different" from the new PP administration.

Following two terms as prime minister, José Luis Rodríguez Zapatero is preparing to withdraw from public life and dedicate his time to being with his family after nearly eight years in office.

The now ex-prime minister will move this week to a new home in Somosaguas, a fashionable suburb on the outskirts of the Spanish capital. For personal reasons, Zapatero has postponed his plans to return to his native León, as he had announced.

Nóos tightens on King’s son-in-law El Pais VALENCIA'S government is studying the possibility of bringing a case before an investigative judge into the affairs of Iñaki Urdangarin, husband of Princess Cristina, who is the target of an inquiry into a possible diversion of public funds.

Popular Party (PP) premier Albert Fabra said his lawyers are looking into the possibility of demanding any money be returned if there is enough evidence that Urdangarin's Institute Nóos deceived the region in winning contracts.

The non-profit Nóos won contracts worth six million euros from both the Valencia and Balearic regional governments to organise sports and tourism conferences. Investigators believe that some of the money to the non-profit entity was diverted to Urdangarin's private businesses.

Meanwhile, investigators have found that at least 116,000 euros from a 1.2-million-euro contract awarded in 2005 by the Balearics ended up in the private company Aizoon, owned by Urdangarin and his wife, the princess.

However, the Balearic government said it was taking a more cautious approach before making a similar decision to Valencia because the case is still under investigation.

13

Friday, December 23, 2011

Obama calls for good relations with new PM GERMANY AWARE OF PAIN IN SPAIN

El Pais JUST hours after the investiture vote that made Mariano Rajoy the new prime minister of Spain, Germany asked Rajoy to “quickly and decisively” rush in the reforms he has announced.

Praising the PP’s “very ambitious” programme, a spokesman for the German government said that Berlin has “confidence in the prompt implementation of the measures for strengthening the competitiveness of Spain.”

Angela Merkel’s government confirmed that it was “aware” that the measures “require a great sacrifice from Spain”, but that it was satisfied with the planned reforms.

After the investiture, United States president Barak Obama personally congratulated Mariano Rajoy according to PP sources. During a ten minute telephone conversation, Obama expressed his desire to maintain “excellent relations”.

SUITS YOU SIR! CAMPS TIED UP LIKE A KIPPER IN ‘SUIT-GATE’ TRIAL A POLICE officer said Monday that former Valencia premier Francisco Camps made repeated phone calls to tailor José Tomás while he was being questioned by investigators in the socalled suit-gate case.

The calls were made soon after the alleged Gürtel ringleader Francisco Correa was arrested in February 2009, according to court testimony.

Camps is accused of accepting dress suits from the Gürtel ring of corrupt businessmen in exchange for fat contracts with the regional government. His trial co-defendant, Ricardo Costa, the former Popular Party (PP) secretary general in Valencia, is also said to have obtained suits and other dress accessories.

Both Camps and Costa claim that they paid for their own suits, but several employees from the Forever

El Pais Young and Milano men's shops testified last week that neither man paid for their clothes.

Tomás, who also said that none of the clothes he tailored were paid for by the defendants, is expected to take the stand on Tuesday.

Meanwhile, the owner of Sastgor, a Navarre clothing manufacturer which provides suits to Forever Young and Milano, said he sent 12 dress suits in Camps' name and six pants and one suit for Costa.

"The suits were made under Francisco Camps name and sent to the stores,” said Franscico Gorina.

The defence team has tried to establish that neither Camps nor Costa had any suits made in their names.

Congratulations: Angela Merkel and Nicolas Sarkozy It is the first time the US president has spoken to Rajoy, although the US did congratulate the PP on election night through its ambassador in Spain.

While leaders, including Nicolas Sarkozy and Angela Merkel did personally congratulate Rajoy after the election, the PP did not give any importance to the fact that Obama did not, saying it was the US tradition.

cue s re i h s a W r fo p u re fi Volunteers

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La Verdad

14

Friday, December 23, 2011

Showstoppers: The Dance Academy strut their stuff

Dance princess Molly heads for Benidorm IT wasn’t exactly the Benidorm Palace. That’s still to come. But the Dance Academy and Stage School held its Xmas Show on Sunday at Casa Ventura, San Luis - and everyone enjoyed it immensely.

The Dance Academy has been going for eight years now and is a fully qualified and accredited organisation with BTDA (The British Theatre Dance Association) in the UK. Pupils of the Dance Academy have appeared in London's West End, Music Videos and one of the pupils, Molly Spinks, is appearing in the new series of the TV show Benidorm.

The Dance School will be appearing in a show at the Benidorm Palace in the spring.

If anyone is interested in joining the school, classes are held in Casa Ventura and restart on January 7.

For more information, please ring the Principal, Miss Suzanne, on 627 371 731.

FAT’LL DO NICELY! El Gordo’s just the ticket for the poor folk of Granen

Church bells Jingle with Xmas funds

A TINY town of 2,000 souls found itself richer by €720 million yesterday (Thursday) after scooping the top prize in Spain’s famed Christmas lottery.

Billed as the world's richest, El Gordo (The Fat One), dishes out some €2.52 billion to winners across the nation.

The top prize was split among the holders of tickets bearing the number 58268. The number appeared on 1,800 tickets, giving winners €400,000 for their €20 ticket.

The state lottery agency said all 1,800 tickets with that number were sold in the town of Granen, located in the arid and barren north-eastern Los Monegros area.

Spain is struggling to emerge from a near two-year recession that has left it with a eurozone-high 21.5 percent unemployment rate.

The Gordo lottery aims for a share-the-wealth system, rather than a single jackpot, and thousands of numbers yield at least some kind of return. Lots of people chip in together

and buy shares of several or many tickets, meaning it is common for multiple prizes to go to the same town.

Other lotteries have larger individual top prizes but El Gordo is ranked as the world's richest for the total sum paid out. The winning number was picked and announced by pupils of Madrid's Saint Ildefonso School in a nationally televised draw.

Since it began in 1812, the December 22 lottery has become a favourite holiday tradition. This year, it sold an estimated €2.7 billion in tickets and the state lottery agency estimated per-capita spending of about €70. Spain holds another big lottery, El Nino, on January 6 to mark the Feast of the Epiphany.

A Christmas concert of the highest quality given at La Zenia church last week raised well over €1,100 euros towards the completion of their new building.

Organised and conducted by Nigel Hopkins, the near-capacity audience was treated to music by two choirs, 'In Harmony', undoubtedly the most polished choir on the Costa, and the ever-popular children's choir, 'Cantemos!' who are going from strength to strength.

There was an incredible

rendition of Castle On A Cloud from Les Miserables, sung by 12year-old Holly Neeson, and Nigel Hopkins himself sang, much to the delight of a very appreciative audience.

The varied programme included a mixture of wellknown carols from In Harmony, and both carols and Christmas songs from the children of Cantemos!

It allended with a rousing rendition of Jingle Bells, which sent the audience home full of Christmas cheer.

15

Friday, December 23, 2011

Cables have turned for nice-guy Vince I WONDER what sort of Christmas beckons for Vince Cable? Just a couple of years ago he was prancing around the dance floor on the festive edition of ‘Strictly Come Dancing’, and riding high as pretty much the UK’s favourite politician.

He could have been the Prime Minister, Chancellor, and Archbishop of Canterbury all rolled into one, and he probably would have won the ‘X Factor’ that year had he entered.

But as he unwraps his presents of slippers and socks on Sunday, the Business Secretary must be crying out for those heady days 24 months ago. He could never have predicted a Cabinet post as a Liberal Democrat, and the moment that he somewhat reluctantly accepted the position, with a hefty prod from his boss Nick Clegg, old Vince has seemed ill at ease with the position.

It also signalled the end of the public’s love affair with the nice guy they liked and trusted.

There’s clearly been a non-stop whispering campaign against him from the Tory right, and various gaffes, like his open hatred against the Murdoch media empire being leaked to a newspaper a year ago.

His distaste for some of his Tory cabinet colleagues is well known, including the Chancellor, George Osborne, who he has to work closely with. Vince’s ability to be a plain speaker has had to be muzzled by the responsibility of government, and it doesn’t sit well with him. But there was some good news for him this week, as his own baby of UK Banking Reform seems to have been given the green light courtesy of an independent report, and crucially the backing of Osborne.

That success might even have him re-thinking any future leadership aspirations, despite his age, as opposed to the thought of having a comfortable fireside retirement, enjoying those Yuletide slippers.

Well, well, well! David Cameron’s veto move a fortnight ago seems to be getting some results within the European Union.

Because crawling out of the bunker with the stench of some rotten boiled sauerkraut, we have the German Foreign

Minister, a guy called Guido Westerwelle, saying all kinds of lovely things about the United Kingdom.

Old Guido has said the German government would support a prosperous “City of London”, and that there was no “hidden agenda against the UK”. And he ended up by saying that Britain was an indispensible partner in the EU! Guido’s grovelling was staged in London alongside his British counterpart, William Hague, who must have loved every moment of it. Guido’s final gem was: “You can count on us, and we count on you”.

I told you last week that it’ll all end up with a nice kiss and make up, and the foundations have been laid even quicker than I’d have thought. Slippery folk these politicians, but once again, our old French friends might need a bit more than a snog to get themselves feeling the old ‘entente cordiale’ with the Brits!

TWO big international figures with very different morals and standards passed away last weekend. One was a man of great courage who ended up ruling a country that had been occupied by the Soviet Union for many years. The other was a tyrant of the highest order who enslaved his

people, like his father did, and spent what money he’s had on nuclear weapons, as opposed to food and other basic essentials.

I’m talking about Vaclav Havel and Kim Jongil.

Havel was Czechoslovakia’s first postCommunist era President, and the guy had guts. Despite the threat of imprisonment from the Moscow bully-boys, the young author put up with all the hassle in calling for democracy in his country.

His plays had to be performed in secret because he criticised the Soviets and he famously co-created the ‘Charter 77’ movement in 1977 which wanted freedom and fairness for all. For that he was imprisoned, and even when he was released, he had secret agents following his every move.

He was a genuine good bloke, who had a sense of fun, loving rock music, making Frank Zappa a cultural ambassador, as well as sharing jazz sessions with President Bill Clinton.

In contrast, fun was not a word that North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il knew the meaning of. Apparently he died of a heart attack caused by overwork (really?), which proves that keeping everybody under your thumb is a stressful business. In a starving population of 23 million, this manic moron had an army of one million, plus every problem you can imagine from constant power cuts and a poor infrastructure, to selling radios that could only pick up North Korean broadcasts.

Hitler used to produce radios like that in the 1930s, so Jong-il must have read some history in the past. I have to say that I laughed when I saw some of the choreographed pictures of women wailing at his coffin, but what was not funny was the response of the world’s leaders.

No one of any prominence had the strength to say good riddance to bad rubbish, which shows that having a large nuclear arsenal forces people to abandon their principles.

But at least I’m sure that the Jong-il clan were delighted with the news that the Castro dynasty in Cuba declared three days of national mourning. I’m sure the good folk of Havana were weeping buckets…..not!!

Santa Claus?

Never heard of you - but you look a bit like Papa Noel...

Ho, ho,ho! Santa Claus seems to be everywhere.

Wonder what’s in those buckets?

16

Friday, December 23, 2011

THE UK NEWS

BOY, 7, SAW HIS DRUNK DAD DIE Press Association

HORROR: The crash in which Trevor McCabe was killed

PICTURES of an horrific crash in which a sevenyear-old boy saw his father killed have been released by police and the boy's family.

The shocking photographs have been released as part of a hard-hitting anti-drink-driving campaign. Dad-of-three Trevor McCabe, 52, was three times over the limit when he was driving his son along the B122, near Castleford, North Yorkshire, in August this year.

Mr McCabe's Volkswagen Golf smashed head-on into a Honda CRV. The dad died and left his little boy seriously injured. The police photographs show the terrible aftermath of the crash. It was so severe that Mr McCabe's Golf was flipped onto its side. The driver and a passenger in the Honda which was travelling in the opposite direction - suffered what were described as '"serious, life-changing injuries".

"Most disturbingly of all, Mr McCabe's seven-yearold son was a passenger in the car that dreadful day and he suffered serious injuries," said Traffic Sergeant Sean Grey, of North Yorkshire Police's Selfish: Trevor McCabe Roads Policing group.

"Apart from the physical trauma, we can only imagine what this child is going to remember for the rest of his life, after being in that car while his dad died next to him.

"On the day this happened Mr McCabe was irresponsible and selfish, thinking only of himself. He had no consideration for his actions as he continued to drink before he drove.

"It is a simple thing that we ask - don't drink and drive - if not for yourself, think of what effect it can and does have on others.’’

Daily Mirror NORTH Korea dictator Kim Jong-il has died of heart failure at the age of 69.

Known as the ‘Dear Leader’, Kim's death was announced in a special broadcast by state media from the capital Pyongyang.

Kim died of a heart problem on a train on Saturday 17 December due to a "great mental and physical strain" during a "high intensity field inspection". The broadcast said a post mortem was carried out yesterday and "fully confirmed" the diagnosis. His funeral will be held on December 28.

His son Kim Jong Un has been named "the great successor".

North Korea said that the people and the military "have pledged to uphold the leadership of comrade Kim Jong Un" and called him a "great successor" of the country's philosophy of juche, or self reliance.

"At the leadership of comrade Kim Jong Un, we have to change sadness to strength and courage and overcome today's difficulties," North Korea said.

It was not immediately clear what effect Kim's death would have on recent efforts to bring most wanted criminal in the North Korea back into 1970s after a string of rob- nuclear talks aimed at beries in which he shot exchanging aid for commitdead three postmasters ments by the North to disand murdered a young girl arm.

The South Korean and for her inheritance.

He got his nickname for US militaries have bolthe way he reacted when stered reconnaissance and police officers approached are sharing intelligence him after he aroused their assets on North Korea, to Seoul's suspicion walking along according defence ministry.

About the street - they described him as having 'fought like a 28,500 US troops are stationed in South Korea. cornered animal'.

Only way out as dead Panther is uncaged Daily Mail SERIAL killer Donald Neilson has died following a long struggle with motor neurone disease 35 years after being jailed.

The prolific prisoner, dubbed the Black Panther during his ’70s crime spree, died in hospital after being taken there from his cell at Norwich Prison.

He was given four life sentences in 1975 and was one of a small group of prisoners who were told they would spend the rest of their lives behind bars.

The muscle-wasting illness left him unable to use his arms and legs and he had to be spoon-fed by nurses.

A Prison Service spokesman said: “HMP , 26, into winners. Wayne Norwich prisoner Donald way has named one Tom Neilson was taken to outname after his dad – full side hospital in the early – y one Ro Thomas Wayne hours of Saturday at wh but it is not yet known December 17 with breaths. her led cal has Coleen, 25, the ing difficulties. He was proA spokesman for - nounced dead at approxicon ht nig t las ys Roone mately 6.45pm on Sunday . ses cha firmed the pur December 18.”

Neilson was the UK's

!

S H IG E -N O O R L A Y THE RO nd National ort of visitor to the Gra a fan, so IT’S known as the Sp o als is and and Wayne splashed Kings and Wayne now e y’v the e to ts.

Coleen Rooney hop col two on 00 se- £100,0 rub shoulders with hor will be kept at ey Th Michael racing’s royalty. nt United team-mate ere top The couple have spe wh s, ble sta two Owen’s part of their fortune on scombe will Da Tom r ine tra s ma racehorses as Christ turning them ular be tasked with treats. Coleen is a reg

US alert at death of ‘Dear Leader’

17

Friday, December 23, 2011

THE TABLOIDS

BULLET BOYS! Police primed to shoot at

LIVE ammunition could be fired at arsonists who threaten lives and police are being trained to fire rubber bullets at children during civil unrest, it has been revealed.

The drastic tactics are among measures to be adopted by police to cope with riots similar to those seen in England over the summer.

A review into police tactics says that officers could shoot looters alongside the use of rubber bullets and water cannons.

Legal advice to Her Majesty's Inspectorate of Constabulary said that firearm use could be justified

child arsonists next time

Volunteer fireman is a small wonder

Daily Mail

given the 'immediacy of the risk and the gravity of the consequences'.

Riot police are being trained to aim their rubber bullets at the belt buckle of their targets The review into police tactics came about following the summer riots.

Officers are trained to fire rubber bullets around the groin area as a 'less lethal' alternative to live ammunition.

Meanwhile, an unnamed police firearms instructor claimed officers are being trained to fire plastic bullets at HARD-UP Brit families are more than rioting children and £500 worse off than this time last year. teenagers.

A survey found households had seen He said the police, who their available income drop by £46 a have to justify each and every month. shot they take, would aim at It is the fifth year in a row that famian individual's belt buckle and lies have seen a fall in the cash they should only fire in a bid to prehave to spend after forking out for tax vent serious injury or the loss and bills.

The Bank of England Quarterly of life.

It would be down to an indiBulletin found 56% said their wages have failed to keep pace with the soa- vidual officer whether to fire at someone who appeared to be ring cost of living.

One in 10 also admitted they strug- a child or teenager, the gle to pay their bills. And 7.5% admit- instructor said.

It can't be ruled out,' he ted falling behind on payments, almost double the figure of a year ago. admitted. 'There will always be the one circumstance.'

S Daily

Brits £500 worse off than in 2010

Jerome Isaac on Tuesday

Daily Star

Horror over lift killing BLISTERED and burnt, the man in the picture above is accused of spraying petrol on a 73-year-old woman and setting her ablaze in a lift.

Handyman Jerome Isaac, 47, appeared in court on Monday charged with murder of postal worker Deloris Gillespie, who died in agony near her home in Brooklyn, New York.

Surveillance video from the elevator shows Isaac holding a canister sprayer. The sprayer was full of petrol, prosecutors said.

Isaac is said to have doused

Gillespie with gasoline as she stood in the elevator of her apartment building.

Isaac pulled out a barbecuestyle lighter, authorities said, and used it to ignite a rag in a bottle.

He waited a few seconds as Gillespie huddled on the floor.

Then he backed out of the elevator and tossed the flaming bottle in.

Isaac is then believed to have set his brother's apartment door on fire. Isaac said nothing during the brief hearing in New York.

Elsewhere, Britain's banks have agreed to give "clearer, more accessible" information about charges for using cards abroad.

The OFT was asked in September to investigate allegations of complex charging and poor information for travellers following a "super-complaint" by Consumer Focus.

The OFT's report found that travel

money providers made £1.1 billion in 2010 from the £32 billion spent by Britons abroad.

OFT chief executive John Fingleton said: "Companies should be earning profits by competing to provide the best value products and services, not through charges that are hard for customers to identify or interpret."

Foreign money purchase fees scrapped FIVE major banks are set to scrap their debit card fees for purchasing foreign currency abroad.

Holidaymakers will no longer be charged at Lloyds Banking Group, Barclays, Royal Bank of Scotland, Santander and the Co-operative Bank, the consumer watchdog announced today.

The five banks have all agreed

Daily Mirror with the Office of Fair Trading (OFT) to remove the charges, which are typically between 1.5% and 2% of the purchase.

Nationwide, HSBC and Halifax Bank of Scotland do not charge a debit-card fee for purchasing foreign currency in the UK.

Mirror

HE may be only 4ft 2in but volunteer fireman Vince Brasco, 19, is a big hit down at his local fire station.

Vince, of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, was born with achondroplasia, a type of dwarfism that affects bone growth.

But he is showing it’s not the size that counts when saving lives.

Far from holding him back, Vince claims that his height and lots of hard work down the gym make him perfect for tough jobs.

Tough Vince, who works part-time in an electronics store and is studying to become a nurse, can bench-press more than three times his own 6-stone 3lb weight, lifting a whopping 19 stone (265lb) at his local gym.

His strength - and his determination to never let his size stop him from doing anything - means he is powerful enough to wield the fire hose and go on rescue jobs with the fire crew.

He said: “You have to be strong to work the hose.”

18

Friday, December 23, 2011

The best roast turkey Christmas or any time Ingredients

• 2 sticks of celery, ground black pepper trimmed and chopped • 12 small fresh rosemary • a big handful of bread- sprigs, plus a few extra • 50g/2oz butter crumbs • 4–4.5kg/9–10lb turkey, • a sprig of fresh sage, • a handful of dried apri- preferably free-range or leaves picked cots organic, at room tempera• 12 strips of pancetta or • 300g/10½ oz minced ture thinly sliced streaky pork • 2 carrots, peeled bacon • zest of 1 lemon • 1 large orange • 1 bulb of garlic, broken a pinch of grated nutmeg • olive oil into cloves • 1 large free-range or • 2 tablespoons plain flour • 4 medium red onions, organic egg • 1.1litres/2 pints chicken peeled • sea salt and freshly or vegetable stock good wipe, inside and out, with kitchen paper, and place it on a board, with the neck One of the biggest challenges when cook- end towards you. Find the edge of the skin ing a turkey is the legs take longer than the that's covering the turkey's breasts and genbreasts. The breasts dry out in the oven tly peel it back. Work your fingers and then while you’re waiting for the legs to cook. I like your hand under the skin, freeing it from the to push stuffing between the turkey’s skin meat. If you're careful you should be able to and breasts, increasing the thickness of the pull all the skin away from the meat, keeping breasts so they take the same time to cook it attached at the sides. Go slowly and try not as the legs. The result? Juicy turkey all to make any holes! Lift the loose skin at the round! neck end and spoon the stuffing between the Preheat the oven to maximum. Heat a skin and the breast, tucking the flap of skin saucepan until medium hot and drop in the underneath to stop anything leaking out. Pop butter, sage leaves and 6 of the pancetta or the orange in the microwave for 30 seconds bacon strips. Peel and chop 2 garlic cloves to warm it up and stuff it into the cavity. and 1 onion. Add the garlic, celery and onion Weigh the stuffed turkey and calculate the to the saucepan and fry everything gently cooking time (about 20 minutes per 500g/1lb until soft and golden brown. Take the pan off 2oz). the heat, add the breadcrumbs and, while Place the bird on a large roasting tray, rub the mix is cooling down, chop the apricots it all over with olive oil and season well. roughly and stir them in. When the stuffing Surround with the chopped carrots, onions, has cooled down, add the pork, lemon zest, remaining garlic, cover with tinfoil and place nutmeg, egg and lots of salt and pepper, and in the preheated oven. Turn the heat down mix everything together well.

Slice the remaining strips of pancetta or right away to 180°C/350°F/gas 4, and roast bacon in half and slice 1 peeled garlic clove for the calculated time, or until the juices run into thin slivers. Place a rosemary sprig and clear from the thigh if you pierce with it a a garlic sliver on one end of a halved strip of knife or a skewer. Remove the tinfoil for the pancetta and roll it up tightly. Repeat with the last 45 minutes to brown the bird. Carefully other pieces of pancetta until you have 12 lit- lift the turkey out of the tray and rest on a tle rolls. Stab the thighs and drumsticks of board that’s covered loosely with foil for 20 the turkey in 6 places on each side. Push a minutes while you finish off the veg and little pancetta roll into each hole until it just gravy. Skim the surface fat from the roasting peeps out. This’ll give your turkey thighs a tray and add the flour and stock. Place the fantastic flavour and will keep them moist tray on the hob and bring to the boil on a high heat. When the gravy starts to thicken, while they cook.

Chop the remaining onions in half and strain it into a bowl. Carve your turkey, serve slice the carrots thickly. Give your turkey a with the gravy and dig in!

Method

19

Friday, December 23, 2011

New Year's Eve dinner party Starter Baked figs & goat's cheese with radicchio INGREDIENTS • oil, for brushing • 6 figs • 200g soft goat's cheese • 1 head radicchio • 85g walnut pieces FOR THE DRESSING • 6 tbsp. olive oil • 3 tbsp. balsamic vinegar 1. Preheat the oven to fan 160C/conventional 180C/gas 4.

Unless the baking sheet is non-stick, line it with foil, then brush the foil lightly with oil.

2. Cut the figs into quarters, from the top almost to the base, and arrange on the foil. Slice the goat's cheese and arrange in the centre of the figs. Bake for 10-15 minutes until the cheese is melted and tinged brown.

3. Meanwhile, whisk the dressing ingredients with some seasoning. Put a couple of good radicchio leaves on each serving plate. Remove the figs from the oven and place on the radicchio leaves. Scatter the walnuts on top. Drizzle with the dressing and serve warm or at room temperature.

Main course Succulent braised venison Venison benefits from long, slow cooking, and this Scottish dish develops a beautifully earthy sweetness - try it as an alternative to turkey, or for Hogmanay INGREDIENTS • 2 carrots , roughly chopped • 140g turnips or swede, roughly chopped • 2 onions , roughly chopped • 3 celery sticks, roughly chopped

• olive oil and butter, for frying • 1 garlic clove , crushed • 1kg boned leg or shoulder of venison , cut into large chunks (or buy ready-cubed venison for stewing) • 5 tbsp. plain flour , seasoned with salt and pepper • 2 tbsp. redcurrant jelly (or rowan or hawthorn jelly) • 450ml dry red wine (Rioja is good) • 450ml beef stock • 2 thyme sprigs • 1 bay leaf 1. Heat oven to 1 8 0 C / f a n 160C/gas 4. Fry the vegetables in a little oil and butter in a heavy-based casserole for 4-5 mins until golden.

Tip in the garlic and fry for a further min, then set aside.

2. Put the venison into a plastic bag with seasoned flour and shake to coat.

Add a little more oil and butter to the pan, and then fry the venison over a high heat, stirring now and then, until well browned. Don't crowd the pan - cook in batches if necessary.

Set aside with the vegetables.

3. Add the redcurrant jelly and wine to the pan, and bring to the boil, scraping up all the bits that have stuck to the bottom. Pour in the stock, and then add the thyme, bay leaf, meat and vegetables. Season if you like and bring to the boil. Cover and transfer to the oven for about 1½ hrs. or until tender. Remove from the oven and check the seasoning.

Dessert Peppered plums with almond ice Plum pudding with almonds and black pepper - a delicious dinner party dessert that's just 20 minutes work INGREDIENTS FOR THE ALMOND ICE • 300.0ml full-fat milk • 50.0g ground almonds • 50.0g caster sugar • 397.0g can condensed milk • almond extract (optional) • toasted flaked almonds , (optional) FOR THE PLUMS • 9 plums , halved and stoned • 1 generous tsp. crushed black peppercorns • 2 generous tsp.

Demerara sugar • about 5 tbsp. maple syrup , for drizzling 1. To make the almond ice, put the milk in a pan with the ground almonds and sugar and bring to the boil. Simmer

for 2-3 mins, then pour into a bowl and cool. Strain through a fine sieve, squeezing every last drop of milk and flavour from the almonds with the back of a spoon. Whisk together the almond milk with the condensed milk, adding a few drops of almond extract to taste, if you like. Churn in an ice cream machine for 15-20 mins, then freeze. Can be made up to 2 weeks ahead.

2. Put a serving bowl for the almond ice in the freezer.

Arrange the plums on a deep baking tray, cut side up. Mix together the crushed peppercorns and Demerara sugar and sprinkle over the plums. Can be done up to 2 hrs. ahead.

3. Drizzle the maple syrup on top. Put under a preheated grill for 6-10 mins until the plums are tender.

4. Now finish it in style. While the plums are grilling, scoop out spoonful’s of the almond ice into the chilled bowl. Return to the freezer until the plums are ready. Arrange the plums on a platter and pour over the syrup from the tray. Serve warm with almond ice and flaked almonds.

Cocktails Raspberry Champagne cocktail Add a sparkle to your party with this fruity, bubbly drink INGREDIENTS • 3 tbsp. Crème de Cassis • bottle of Champagne , chilled • a few raspberries 1. Pour the Crème de Cassis into 8 Champagne flutes.

Slowly pour a bottle of chilled C h a m p a g n e between each glass and, just before serving, drop a few raspberries into each drink.

20

Friday, December 23, 2011

Choir is a delight THE Cantabile Singers concluded their Christmas programme with a rousing performance at the Palacio de Musica, Torrevieja, in aid of Stroke Support.

Audience members, including Graham Knight, Torrevieja’s director of information for international residents and Rosario Martinez Chazarra, the

director for foreigners, were enthralled by the programme of Christmas Carols and joined in with many favourites.

A highlight of the evening was a medley of Spanish Carols, including Fum Fum Fum, Noche de Paz (Night of Peace), El Tamborilero (The Drummer), Navidad Navidad and

Campana sobre Campana.

A group of Ukranian children associated with Nataliya Khomyak, the choirs’ talented pianist joined the singers.

Soloists were Pat Kay, Jan Robson, Phyl Webb, Eve Day, Pat Yardley, Alicia Muddle, June Sanders, M.D., Jennifer Morton and Taras Khomyak.

NIGHT OF GIFTS

Charities strike it rich FUNDRAISING group, Charity for Charities held its annual presentation night in the Bull Flanagan Restaurant, giving away €10,000 to various charities.

Glittering occasion: charities receive their donations

The event was attended by the mayor of Rojales, Antonio Pérez García, and Derek Monks, councillor for foreign residents.

More than 80 people watched as the money was handed out to some very deserving causes.

This year’s chosen charities included health charities, children’s charities and animal charities, with each being given a cheque for €1,000.

The following charities were the lucky ones chosen by Charity for Charities this

year - Alzheimers (Torrevieja), S.A.T.s (animal rescue), Isacc House (Uganda), NeoNatal Unit (Torrevieja Hospital), Oncology Unit (Torrevieja Hospital), E.O.S. (Ostimates), Preventoria Gandía, Debra’s (children’s skin disorders), Age Concern, Caritas Rojales (helping the poor and children in need).

It was a great evening and as well as the pride and emotion of the charity presentations, guests enjoyed excellent entertainment provided free of charge by Bobby Dazzler, Debbie Slater and Matt Christian.

Charity for Charities members have worked extremely hard throughout the year and their fundraising efforts in 2010 raised a staggering €20,642.60 for good causes.

Cold comfort LUCKY Tony and Pamela Waller from La Marina won €75 worth of goodies from Iceland in the Lions Club draw.

The Torrevieja Costa Lions, who organised the draw with Iceland, are once again raising much needed funds to help disabled children in the local community. The draw raised €425.00 for the Lions to put toward this great cause.

Tony and Pamela are pictured with Iceland manager Graham and assistant Paula.

Alzheimer’s full house It was a full-house for last week’s Christmas Bingo evening at Restaurant Catorce in Benijofar – and jackpot time for the Alzheimer’s Association of Torrevieja.

The evening of fun raised a stupendous €745, which Association treasurer Judy Ferris said was by far the most the organisation had made from one evening’s entertainment.

Chris and Mark from VibeFM were the MCs, and the restaurant provided the 91 guests with a hot turkey bap and glass of mulled wine.

Alzheimer’s would like to send a special thank-you to all those who donated prizes for the raffle and the games.

A HOST of good causes have had a Christmas windfall thanks to variety group, Rascals, whose members have staged many seasonal fundraisers.

A show at the Virgen del Carmen saw the group donate €1,200 to APANEE, along with 70 Chocolate Father Christmases for the children.

A Carol concert in San Luis square in aid of AMFA, a charity that helps the physically disabled, raised €360.44, with the Rascals making thè donation up to €400. And a carol concert and show in Los Montesinos raised €1,105 For ADISMON. Rascals put on parties and handed out presents, too, for the students of ALPE, for Age Concern and for the residents of Los Jardines de Clara pensioners home in Torrevieja, where they performed alongside members of Age Concern and Cathy Carson to the music of Just Brass.

Rascals raise festive funds

THE Cardenal Belluga Theatre Group have that feel good factor having sung their Christmas Carol hearts out at three different locations this year and once again the generosity of the public is always amazing despite the cut backs that we are all having to make. The Cardenal Belluga Theatre Group has decided to share all the donations between The Butterfly Children’s Charity, K9 and PAWS this year.

The Group will be starting rehearsals, for their 2012 production, at the San Fulgencio Theatre on Monday 9th of January at 1pm. How about trying something different in the New Year. We welcome all newcomers. Call Maria on 966715891 to enquire.

21

Friday, December 23, 2011

CRACKER OF A NIGHT!

Singers celebrate a pure gold year

Photographer: Mike Prentice

bringing the total raised for the event to €909.

MABS was especially grateful to Paco, the owner of the restaurant, for making everyone so welcome.

More money was raised when a small team of walkers, runners and dogs went to Los Alcázares to take part in the MABS Race for Life.

Two coffee mornings in volunteers’ houses in Calasparra and Cehegin raised €113. Local supporter, ‘Big’ John Vass, organised a karaoke night at the Trevol Bar in Calasparra, raising a further €62.

The MABS Market stall in Calasparra, which takes place every first and third Friday of the month from 09.00 – 13.00, continues to raise an average of €300 a month. The MABS book stall, on the last Friday of the month between 11.00 – 13.30 at the Trevol Bar, Urb. Tierra del Sol, Calasparra raises approximately €50 a month.

MABS supports people with cancer and their families. Helpline number is 693 275 779 or visit www.mabsmurcia.com

Photographer: Arthur Coulson

From left: MABS volunteers at the main fundraising event, Race for Life supporters, and Restaurante Santuario boss Paco with a volunteer MABS Murcia North West has been busy with several fundraising events over the past two months, raising almost €1100.

The main fundraising event was held in early December at the Restaurante Santuario de la Esperanza on the outskirts of Calasparra.

With the restaurant decked out with Christmas trees, baubles and singing Santas, the 160 Spanish and English guests, including deputy mayor of Calasparra, Pepe Velez, got into the festive mood early. The Christmas crackers were a novelty for the Spanish, most of whom had never seen them before.

An excellent four course meal was provided, with a traditional turkey main course and mince pies to finish the meal.

Guests were entertained

by Barrington who sang blues, soul and Tamla Motown hits until the early hours of the morning. A raffle was held and the first prize, a lady’s classic, gold-plated watch, was kindly donated by Jan Nash. This raised €503,

BARBERSHOP chorus champions, Spangles Ladies’ Harmony Chorus, has been busier than ever this Christmas.

The ladies launched Christmas on December 11 at Centro Comercial Dos Mares, entertaining Spanish and foreign shoppers with their festive repertoire.

Spangles then visited the Novo Carthago/Paddy Singh’s in Los Urrutias to sing to diners before sitting down to their own Christmas dinner in the restaurant.

Then they joined three Spanish choruses to sing in the beautiful surroundings of la Iglesia de Santo Domingo in Cartagena.

“It was a magical concert,” said co-Chorus Manager, Lyn Baines, “and our MD was honoured to be asked to conduct

all four choirs singing Noche de Paz at the end”. Spangles was presented with a plaque to commemorate the occasion, and were told by the church that they are welcome back at any time to sing.

And, Spangles members, who are supporters of MABS Murcia/Mar Menor, helped pack bags at Iceland, San Javier, yesterday to help get customers in the Christmas mood and raise money for MABS. “We’ve had an amazing year,” commented Spangles MD, Gail Grainger. “Becoming the 2011 barbershop champions of MSpain and Portugal was truly the highlight of the year.”

Spangles has released a CD, Pure Gold. It costs €8, and is an ideal Christmas present. Call 968 432 525 to order.

22

Friday, December 23, 2011

Have a Laugh with The Courier Ten Peeves that Dogs A pub story Have About Humans

Four guys were telling stories in a pub. One guy leaves to go to the toilet. Three guys were left...........

The first guy says, “I was worried that my son was going to be a loser because, he started out washing cars for a local dealership. Turns out that he got a break, they made him a salesman, and he 1. Blaming your farts on every time we go back! me... not funny... not funny 8. Getting upset when I sold so many cars that he bought the dealat all!!! sniff the crotches of your ership. In fact, he’s so successful that he 2. Yelling at me for barkguests. Sorry, but I haven't just gave his best friend a new "Mercedes" ing... I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, quite mastered that hand- for his birthday."

The second guy says, “I was worried about YOU IDIOT! shake thing yet.

3. Taking me for a walk, 9. Dog jumpers. Hello? my son too because he started out raking then not letting me check Haven't you noticed the leaves for a realtor. Turns out he got a break, they made him a commissioned stuff out. Exactly whose fur? walk is this anyway?

6. The sleight of hand, 10. How you act disgusted salesman, and he eventually bought the real 4. Any trick that involves fake fetch throw. You when I lick myself. Look, estate firm In fact, he’s so successful that he balancing food on my fooled a dog! Whoooo we both know the truth, just gave his best friend a new house for his birthday." nose... stop it!

Hoooooooo what a proud you're just jealous.

5. Any haircut that moment for the top of the Now lay off me on some of The third guy says,"Yeah, I hear you. My involves bows or ribbons. food chain. these thing's, we both Now you know why we 7. Taking me to the vet for know who's boss here!!! chew your stuff up when "the big snip", then acting You don't see me picking you're not home. surprised when I freak out up your poop do you???

IN PRISON... you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.

AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 desk cubicle.

IN PRISON...you get three meals a day.

A man was rushing his wife, who was preg- tificates filed and both you and your wife AT WORK...you only get a break for one nant with twins, to the hospital. He was so were unconscious so I named them for meal and you pay for it. nervous and disoriented, he pulled up to you.'

IN PRISON...you get time off for good the emergency room and rear- ended an The husband's heart jumped up into to his behaviour ambulance! Though a very minor bump, he throat, thinking, 'Oh no, what has he done AT WORK...you get more work for good actually passed out from the stress! now?' He nervously asked his brother, 'W- behaviour.

Upon regaining consciousness, he saw his w-well, what did you name them?'

IN PRISON…the guard locks and unlocks brother (a relentless world- class practical The brother replied, 'I named the little girl all the doors for you. joker) sitting at his bed side.

Denise.'

AT WORK...you must carry around a He asked his brother how his wife was and 'Really?!? Oh! Well, that's a very pretty security card and open all the doors for his brother replied, name!' the husband said, his relief show- yourself.

'Don't worry, everybody is fine and you ing as he sat up. 'And what did you name IN PRISON...you can watch TV and play have a son and a daughter. But the hospi- my son?' games. tal was in a real hurry to get the birth cer- 'Denephew.'

AT WORK...you get fired for watching TV

NAMING THE TWINS

son started out sweeping floors in a brokerage firm. Well, he got a break, they made him a broker, and now he owns the brokerage firm. In fact, he’s so rich that he just gave his best friend €1 million in stock for his birthday."

The fourth guy comes back from the restroom. The first 3 explain that they are telling stories about their kids so he says, “Well, I'm embarrassed to admit that my son is a major disappointment. He started out as a hairdresser and is still a hairdresser after 15 years. In fact, I just found out that he's GAY and has SEVERAL boyfriends. But I try to look at the bright side; his boyfriends just bought him a new Mercedes, a new house, and €1 million in stock for his birthday!"

MAKES YOU THINK

and playing games.

IN PRISON...you get your own toilet.

AT WORK...you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.

IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family on the phone.

IN PRISON...the taxpayers pay all expenses with no work required.

AT WORK...you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.

IN PRISON...you must deal with sadistic wardens.

AT WORK...they are called managers.

Have a Great Day at WORK - I'm going to PRISON!!!

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Friday, December 23, 2011

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain four years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then.

Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Bill was having problems with Internet Explorer ADVICE: Ayliffe wanted to ensure that his Internet Hi Richard I use Explorer was always maximised and took up the entire Internet explorer and monitor screen. the screens that pop-

Q

Hola Richard, I am having the problem of page size when I open up Internet Explorer. I am running Windows 7 and when I open any web page it need the expand box to be clicked to make it full size. Previously I did not need to do this and wonder if there is some way of setting Internet Explorer to a default setting thus opening full window. All the best Ayliff .

up are the small windows that you usually get in which the attachment appears, but what happens is 1 appears than another and within 5 /6 seconds there are 12 /15 /even 20 on the screen and I have to close down to save the computer.

Q A

Hi Bill, this is not normal behaviour at all, I have had a good dig around the Internet and can’t find any references to this type of behaviour. I suspect that there is either something malicious (virus/malware related) going on or Internet Explorer has just got itself in a bit of a mess. Let’s not jump to worrying conclusions first, given that you have not mentioned anything else strange happening with your computer let’s assume in the first instance that it’s not a virus, although I would not use your computer for anything confidential until you have this problem sorted out and I would advise that you ensure that your Antivirus program is up to date of course. Let’s try resetting Internet Explorer and see if that helps fix the problem, you need to do the following…

A

Hi Ayliffe, normally this is remembered behaviour by Windows. What I mean is that most Windows programs remember what state they were in when they were last closed down, so if you maximise a program and then close it down it will be maximised when you next launch it. If for whatever reason this is not working for you then you could try forcing the application to be launched in a maximised window, you can do this by doing the following…

1.

Right hand click the shortcut for Internet Explorer on your desktop (if you don’t have one then you should drag IE to the desktop to create one) 2.

Click on the Properties menu option and a screen similar to the one below will be shown…

1.

Launch Internet Explorer 2.

Click Tools, Internet Options 3.

Click the Advanced Tab 4.

Click the Reset button 5.

Tick the box to delete personal data (be aware that this will delete any saved passwords, so make sure that you know them) 6.

Click the Reset button … This will reset Internet Explorer, you should then close and re-open it and see if this helps with the problem.

I would just like to say Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all my customers Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

3.

4.

Click on the drop down box next to Run and choose “Maximised” Click Ok

…this will force Internet Explorer to launch in a maximised state whenever launched from this shortcut.

Finally if neither of those work then you could try using some third party software, I’ve had a look around and you can find one such program here http://tinyurl.com/maximised

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

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Friday, December 23, 2011

Friday, December 23, 2011

25

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Friday, December 23, 2011

The Truth About Hangover Cures Myths about hangovers are as varied and as fanciful as the cocktails that cause the dreaded syndrome. From eating pasta at bedtime to popping prickly pear pills, the list of supposed hangover cures warrants a closer look.

Learn what works -- and what hurts -- as we sort through 8 common hangover myths.

MYTH: Hangovers Are No Big Deal FACT: A hangover is the body's reaction to being poisoned with too much alcohol. Heavy drinking rocks the central nervous system. It tinkers with brain chemicals -- leading to headache, dizziness, and nausea -- and sends you running to the bathroom so often you become dehydrated. The morning-after price of this imbalance can include a pounding headache, fatigue, cotton mouth, queasy stomach -- and a weakened immune system.

MYTH: Only Bingers Get Hangovers FACT: While it's true that binge drinking could speed your way to a hangover, you don't have to get wasted to pay a price the next morning. Depending on your body composition, just a couple of drinks can trigger a headache and other hangover symptoms. Having water or a non-alcoholic drink between each beer and hard drink can help keep you hydrated and reduce the overall amount of alcohol you consume.

fast, this moment will just come later in the day. And if you find you can't function without a wake-up cocktail, you should discuss the possibility of addiction with your doctor.

MYTH: Coffee Is the Cure FACT: Coffee leads to more dehydration and could make your hangover worse. After a night of drunkenness, it's best to avoid anything with caffeine. Instead, sip water and sports drinks to counter dehydration and replace lost electrolytes.

This is especially important if you experienced any vomiting.

MYTH: Herbal Remedies Can Help FACT: British researchers reviewed the available studies on hangover pills, such as yeast and artichoke extract. They concluded that there is no compelling evidence of any effective treatment. Another British team found a supplement made from prickly pear cactus may reduce the nausea and dry mouth associated with hangovers, but not the dreaded headache. The only proven cure is time.

NO MYTH: Alcohol Poisoning

MYTH: Eat Pasta Before Bed FACT: This one is wrong on two counts. First, eating at bedtime (after you're already drunk) is no help. Food has to be in your stomach before Happy Hour to have any impact.

Second, while any food can slow the body's absorption of alcohol, fat does it best. So go for steak or pizza before your first martini, and you might escape a hangover. One bedtime tip that does help -- drink water to fight dehydration.

WHAT IS INSULIN RESISTANCE

Insulin resistance is a condition where the natural hormone insulin becomes less effective at lowering blood sugars. As a result, higher levels of insulin are needed in order for insulin to have its effects. The resistance is seen with both the body's own insulin (endogenous) and if insulin is given through injection. The pancreas, a gland in the abdomen, secretes insulin in response to certain signals mainly a rise in blood sugar levels. Insulin then acts on various sites in the body to initiate different mechanisms that ultimately removes glucose from the bloodstream. One of the actions of insulin is to cause the cells of the body, particularly the muscle and fat cells, to remove and use glucose from the blood. This is one way in which insulin controls the level of glucose in the blood.

Insulin has this effect on the cells by binding to insulin receptors on the surface of the cells. You can think of it as insulin "knocking" on the doors of muscle and fat cells.

The cells hear the knock, open up, and let glucose in to be used up. With insulin resistance, the cells don't hear the knock as well (they are resistant), and the pancreas is notified that it needs to make more insulin, which increases the level of insulin in the blood and causes a louder knock. The resistance of the cells continues to increase over time. As long as the pancreas is able to produce enough insulin to overcome this resistance, blood glucose levels remain normal. When the pancreas can no longer produce enough insulin, the blood glucose levels begin to rise, initially after meals when glucose levels are at their highest and more insulin is needed, but eventually in the fasting state too. At this point, type 2 diabetes is present.

MYTH: Alcohol Helps You Sleep Well FACT: Alcohol disrupts sleep. While a nightcap may help you doze off more quickly, it undermines the quality of your sleep. You don't spend as much time in all-important REM cycles and you tend to wake up too soon. If you've been drinking heavily, a hangover might strike in the last part of the night, leaving you too uncomfortable to get back to sleep.

MYTH: A Wake-Up Cocktail is the Cure FACT: More alcohol in the morning does nothing but postpone a hangover. The worst symptoms hit when blood-alcohol levels drop to zero. If you have a screwdriver at breakThe Xmas Grove of the

staff of Elite Hair and Beauty Academy held their Party Lunch on Friday 16 December, at the Olive Restaurant in Torretta II in Torrevieveija. As sponsors charity CARITAS, (the charity that helps provide for

FACT: Alcohol poisoning is a potentially deadly medical emergency. Symptoms of alcohol poisoning include: • Confusion, stupor • Vomiting • Seizures • Slow, irregular breathing • Low body temperature, bluish skin It's easy to blow off these symptoms as the price of partying hard, but if you see someone vomit multiple times or pass out after drinking heavily, there’s a risk of severe dehydration or brain damage. A visit to the nearest emergency room is urgently needed. the homeless and the needy, due to high unemployment in Torrevieja), Margharita, Manager and Trainer with Elite, presented Carlos Garcia Martinez from CARITOS with 7 large bags of Dried Food, Toys, Blankets and Clothing,donated from the staff and clients of the Elite Hair and Beauty Academy, to be distributed to the needy throughout Torrevieja over the Xmas period. A huge thank you was also given to Latashia, also a Manager and Trainer with Elite Hair and Beauty, who is a great help and support to the CARITAS Charity throughout the year.

There are probably several causes of insulin resistance and there is thought to be a strong genetic factor (an inherited component), some medications can also lead to insulin resistance. In addition, insulin resistance is seen often in the following conditions: obesity, stress and pregnancy. There are no definitive symptoms of insulin resistance. It is commonly associated with a group of conditions that are collectively known as metabolic syndrome. The symptoms of these other conditions like high blood pressure (hypertension), high blood cholesterol (hypercholesterolemia) and high glucose levels (hyperglycemia) often in the presence of abdominal obesity may be indicative of insulin resistance. Sometimes a person with severe insulin resistance may develop darkening of the skin at the folds of the body, a condition known as acanthosis nigricans. There is no specific treatment for insulin resistance.

The focus is largely on diet and exercise to manage insulin resistance with the goal of reversing it. Dietary modification for insulin resistance should involve avoiding high glycemic index (GI) carbohydrates such as white sugar and white flour. These foods cause the blood glucose level to become significantly elevated after a meal thereby requiring insulin. Low glycemic index (GI) foods are broken down slowly and do not cause spikes in the blood glucose level as is the case with high GI foods. A person with insulin resistance should consult with a dietician to develop an eating plan that is calorie-restricted for specific weight loss goals, comprising low GI foods, be palpable for individual tastes yet be convenient for one’s lifestyle.

Dr Machi Mannu is a Neuro-repatterning Specialist.

For queries, send your email to contact@mindspa.es

27

Friday, December 23, 2011

Christmas Symbol Trivia Christmas is a holiday full of symbollism. Do you know the meanings of the different Christmas symbols? Test your Christmas trivia knowledge with the tidbits below.

What is the Meaning of Gold?

The gift of gold to the Christ Child is supposed to have come from Melchior, a king from Arabia, who, legend has it, was one of the Three Wise Men. His contribution is thought to have financed the Holy Family's flight into Egypt.

Gold, as valuable today as it was in Christ's time, symbolizes immortality, divinity, purity, and the kingship of Jesus Christ.

What is the Meaning of Frankincense?

Tradition maintains that Balthasar, one of the Three Wise Men who came from the East to find the Christ Child, presented frankincense to the baby as a gift. By honoring him in this way, Balthasar fulfilled the prophecy that gold and frankincense would be brought from the Gentiles to honor the heavenly king (Isaiah 60 and Psalm 72).

Frankincense, a sweet gum resin from the Boswellia tree, is the purest of incense.

When burned, it produces white smoke and a sweet smell, symbolizing the prayers and praises of the faithful as well as Christ's sacrifice and the divine name of God.

What is the Meaning of Myrrh?

Caspar, a king from Tarsus and one of the Three Wise Men, is believed to have given myrrh to the Baby Jesus.

Myrrh is known for its medicinal value and was used in ancient times for cleaning wounds and sores, as an analgesic, and for embalming the dead or anointing kings.

Myrrh is actually an aromatic gum resin that oozes from gashes cut in the bark of the commiphora tree. It hardens into teardrop-shaped chunks and is then pounded into powder or mixed to make ointments and perfumes. It is named for its bitter taste and symbolizes the Suffering Savior, the Great Physician, and Christ's human nature.

What is an Advent Wreath?

The season of Advent is the beginning of the church year for Christians. It starts the fourth Sunday before Christmas Day and ends on Christmas Eve. Meaning "arrival," Advent is a celebration of the birth of Jesus and his eventual return.

Many families celebrate this holy season by lighting an Advent wreath. A circular evergreen wreath is laid flat and adorned with four candles around the wreath and one in the center. It is very symbolic of: • The circular shape of the wreath epitomizes God himself, his endless mercy, and eternity, which has no beginning or end.

• The green pine boughs signify hope in God and eternal life.

• Candles reflect the light of Jesus coming into the world.

The four purple candles around the wreath stand for the four Sundays of Advent and for the four centuries between the time the prophet Malachi predicted the coming of the Messiah and the actual birth of Jesus. One purple candle is lit for each Sunday in Advent, with one candle lit on the first Sunday, two on the second Sunday, and so on, until all four candles are lit on the fourth Sunday. The white center candle symbolizes Christmas Day and is lit on that day.

What is the History of the Christmas Card?

The time-honored tradition of sending Christmas cards began more than 150 years ago in England. Sir Henry Cole, a renaissance man who wrote and published books on art and architecture, was too busy to write holiday greetings to friends and family, so he asked John Callcott Horsley, a wellknown painter, to design a card with a single message that could be sent to

everyone on his list.

Horsley created a lithographed, hand-colored sketch printed on cardboard. The illustration depicted a classic Victorian Christmas scene of a family merrily eating and drinking. The caption read, "A Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to You." The first Christmas card appeared in the United States in the mid-1800s, when New York engraver Richard Pease designed a card with a small Santa Claus, a sleigh, and reindeer.

In 1875, Louis Prang, who wrote and published architectural books, printed images in color with a series of lithographic zinc plates. The finished product resembled an oil painting. These cards were so in demand that Prang couldn't fulfill all of his orders. At one point Prang was printing five million cards a year. His efforts earned him the moniker, "The Father of the American Christmas Card."

Today, everything from clever verses and holiday scenes to geometric designs and sports figures grace the fronts of cards. An average household mails out 28 Christmas cards each year and receives the same number in return. More than three billion Christmas cards are sent annually.

Religious Christmas Trivia Test your religious Christmas trivia knowledge with the fun questions on this page. Do you understand the ancient beliefs behind the various Christmas songs? Do you know the meaning of the word "Xmas?" Find out.

Can you Describe the First Live Nativity Scene?

In a cave on a windswept Italian mountainside, Francis of Assisi assembled the first Christmas crib in 1223. The Christ Child, placed on an altar of stone, and two live animals -- an ox and a donkey -- were its only occupants.

Today, a tiny monastery surrounds the cave, which still remains relatively undisturbed by the years.

The idea behind the crib was to make the story of Christ's birth more vivid in the minds of shepherds and farmers who lived there. The townspeople were very enthusiastic -they were the ones who suggested the ox and donkey.

What is the belief behind the Twelve Days of Christmas song?

One of the holiday's best-loved songs, "The Twelve Days of Christmas," marks the longest holiday in the Christian calendar -- the time between Christmas Day and Epiphany, celebrated on January 6.

The song's origin is unknown, but some believe the song was written to help Catholic children remember various articles of faith. These are: True love God A partridge in a pear tree Jesus Two turtle doves Old and New Testaments Three French hens Faith, Hope, and Charity Four calling birds Four Gospels Five golden rings The first five books of the Old Testament, the Pentateuch, which records the history and laws of ancient Israel Six geese a-laying Six days of Creation Seven swans a-swimming Seven gifts of the Holy Spirit, or the Seven Sacraments Eight maids a-milking Eight beatitudes Nine ladies dancing Nine fruits of the Holy Spirit

Ten lords a-leaping Ten Commandments Eleven pipers piping Eleven faithful disciples Twelve drummers drumming Twelve points of doctrine in the Apostles' Creed

Where is the World's Largest Nativity Scene located?

With more than 450 figures and hundreds of yards of landscape, the world's largest diorama of the Nativity is found in Einsiedeln, Switzerland. In the 1930s, crib maker Ferdinand Pottmesser built a giant Christmas crib along with hundreds of figurines.

Pottmesser sold the collection to Einsiedeln in the mid1950s, and the figurines became the impetus for creating a giant diorama -- a copy of the landscape of Bethlehem and a visually accurate representation of the story of the birth of Christ.

The diorama starts with angels awakening the shepherds with news of the birth of Jesus and ends with Joseph and Mary fleeing into Egypt to escape Herod and his soldiers.

The diorama attracts thousands of visitors every year.

What is the Meaning of the Word “Xmas?”

Some people think of Xmas as a contemporary, sacrilegious abbreviation of the word Christmas. On the contrary, the first letter of the word Christ in the Greek language is chi, which is identical to the modern Roman alphabet's X. Therefore, Xmas is an ecclesiastical abbreviation that has been used for almost as long as Christmas has been in existence.

What is the story behind The Birthplace of Jesus?

It was prophesied in Micah 5:2 that Bethlehem would be the birthplace of the future King of the Jews. Indeed, this small Judean city near Jerusalem became the site of the Nativity. Bethlehem, which means "house of bread," was also the home of David, one of God's favorite kings.

Though the exact location of Jesus' birth is unknown, the story maintains that Jesus was born in a stable and laid in a manger, or food trough. In those days, stables were made of stones or situated in a cave.

Around A.D. 326-330, Empress Helena, wife of Constantine, built a church over the cave thought to be Jesus' birthplace. The church was rebuilt in the sixth century, and pieces of the original building still remain. It is said to be the oldest Christian church in existence and one of the most genuinely holy sites in the Holy Land.

This altar inside the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem is believed to mark the exact place of Jesus' birth.

Who was Good King Wenceslas?

“Good King Winceslas looked out on the Feast of Stephen when the snow lay round about deep and crisp and even.”

King Wenceslas, about whom John Neale wrote this carol, became Duke of Bohemia in A.D. 924. He was a man of great faith who worked diligently to thread Christianity throughout Bohemia.

King Wenceslas served his people very well, especially the children and the poor. But his reign lasted only five years. His brother, Boleslaw, invited Wenceslas to a religious festival, then attacked and murdered him on the way there.

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Friday, December 23, 2011

Plastic fantastic PROPER cars are made of metal.

Plastic cars are inferior. Everyone knows that.

Of course, that's rubbish. Some of the world's greatest cars have had

plastic bodywork, including every Lotus ever made, the Corvette, TVRs and a host of other machinery.

Modern-day engineers are turning to plastic more and more. For

Alfa Romeo Giulia TZ

local Italian firm to make the bodywork out of plastic - not a very happy arrangement. It wouldn't be until the 1989 Z1 roadster that BMW returned to glass fibre, using plastic for the front and rear wings.

Alfa's first plastic car was the first Giulia TZ2 of 1965, 10 examples of which were made with glass fibre bodies - a real revolution for Alfa. The 1989-91 Alfa SZ, built by Zagato, famously had a body made of Modar, a plastic never used before or since on cars. Paint had a very hard job sticking to it, a problem that was never fully resolved.

BMW M1 Aston Martin DB7

body parts like bumpers because of its light weight and deformability. CitroĂŤn went further than most with the BX, choosing to make not just the bumpers out of plastic but also the bonnet and tailgate.

Ferrari 308

out of aluminium by skilled craftsmen - aren't they? Nope. Not the DB7, at any rate. When Aston moved into the mass production arena, it needed a cheaper way to make bodies. It took a leaf out of the Corvette's book and turned to plastic for the DB7. The wings, bonnet, bumpers, sills and boot lid were all made of the unrustable stuff.

Aston Martins are lovingly hand-sculpted

example, BMW's new 6 Series has many panels made of plastic.

Here are 15 cars with glass fibre bodywork - some of which will shock you.

BMW has a surprising affiliation with glass fibre. It turned to Lamborghini to build its 1979 M1 supercar. Lambo in turn asked a

As launched in 1975, the 308 GTB was the first production Ferrari to have a glass fibre body (only the front bonnet was aluminium). The Italians called it 'vetroresina' we called it plastic. Ferrari switched to steel in 1977 after only 818 plastic cars had been made, and they're now more desirable than steel 308s. The 365 GT4 Berlinetta Boxer also had glass fibre lower bodywork.

BMW 6 Series BMW has made a real move towards plastic bodywork with its latest 6 Series convertible. The front side panels, roof cover and boot are all made from glass fibre in order to reduce weight.

Fiat 131 Abarth Rallye

Citroen BX 1980s car interiors were full of plastic, but manufacturers also jumped at glass fibre for In 1971, Fiat homologated its Abarth 124 Spider for rallying with a lighter boot and bonnet made of glass fibre. The company got even lighter and more plasticky with the Fiat 131 Abarth Rallye of 1976, whose pumped-up bodywork had lots of glass fibre - front wings, bonnet, boot, spoilers and air dams.

DOH!

29

Friday, December 23, 2011

Lancia Stratos

One of the world's most beautiful cars, Lancia's mid-engined Stratos road car made it into production in 1973. Its steel monocoque structure was clothed in all-glass fibre panel work. Coachbuilder Bertone built the cars.

Mini

As any owner of a dog-eared old Mini can tell you, their bodies are made of all-toorustprone steel. But in Venezuela and Chile, local laws required cars to have a high percentage content of local parts, so glass fibre Mini shells were made in both countries. At least they didn't rust...

Opel Ascona/Manta 400

Porsche 904 Carrera GTS

Fat-winged and feisty, the 1979-83 Opel 400s were rally homologation specials. Very rare (fewer than 700 were built), they used a lot of plastic to reduce weight: the bonnet, boot, bumpers and spoilers were all made of glass fibre.

Porsche plastic? Indeed. The 1964 904 Carrera GTS was the first Porsche ever to use a glass fibre body, which was made by spraying chopped fibre into a mould, after which the body was bonded to the ladder chassis. The plastic 904 did rather well in GT racing.

Pontiac Fiero

Renault Espace

Using a separate steel frame and clothing it in non-stressed glass fibre panels was a stroke of genius for Pontiac. The Fiero remains the fastest-selling plastic car ever, shifting 370,168 examples in just five years.

Those moulds must have been smoking by the end of it. Mazda copied the whole idea with its rather less successful plastic-bodied AZ-1 micro-gullwing coupĂŠ.

It was Matra that Renault approached to make its Espace, the world's first MPV. Matra had plenty of experience making cars - but only plastic cars. The Espace therefore became an unlikely vanguard of the plastic art, as many owners discovered when their paintwork faded and flaked like a plastic toy left out in the sun. The later Avantime also had plastic bodywork.

A MAN in a Jaguar passed a Mini that had broken down by the side of the road. Being a kindly driver, he stopped and fixed a tow-rope to it and began towing it to the nearest garage.

After 10 minutes of towing, a Porsche passed them at high speed. The Jaguar driver was not going to be outdone by a Porsche, so, forgetting that he had a Mini in tow, slammed his foot down and the Jaguar and Porsche indulged in a high-speed race down the road, the Mini and its occupant trailing wildly about at the end of the rope frantically trying to attract their attention and

Just a bit of fun! failing.

A Police car saw them and gave chase. The Police driver radioed back to Headquarters "Sarge, you'll never believe this, I've just seen a Porsche and a Jaguar neck and neck doing 150 mph - and a bloke in a Mini flashing his lights, blowing his horn and trying to overtake them!"

Renault Alpine A610

Alpine was France's answer to Lotus, even down to its glass fibre bodywork. Every Alpine from the A106 of 1955 right up until the A610 of 1991-95 was made of plastic.

The later Renault Sport Spider was another piece of fantastic plastic Frenchness.

Saab Sonett

Swedish cars are big, boxy, safe and steely - right? Not always. The lithe Sonett sports car, made between 1966 and 1974 (but never sold in the UK), had a swoopy body made of glass fibre. The whole front end hinged up to allow access to the engine, transmission and front suspension.

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Friday, December 23, 16, 2011

Ladies, the party season is nearly upon us and its time to dig out those LBD’s or treat yourself to a new one! Here are some that we at The Courier recommend...

THE LATEST FASHION HEADLINES

Bershka, 39.99€

Blanco, 39.99€

Blanco, 19.99€

French shoe label Roger Vivier has revealed the launch of a mini-me footwear line, following the increasing popularity of designer childrenswear.

Roger Vivier is the latest designer delving into the realm of childrenswear, with a junior collection inspired by its iconic adult styles for release in March. The line will be a reworking of the house's brightly colored patent leather adult ballerinas, which carry the brand's signature buckle.

This week has seen the annoucement of two new fashion collections for men, from designers Vera Wang and Isaac Mizrahi.

New York-based designer Vera Wang, best known for her bridal collections, has announced she's launching a tuxedo collection called Black by Vera Wang.

The debut collection will be available for rental in two fits and two colors (black and gray).

Be

rsh

Asos, 27.57€

zara, 49.95€

H&M, 39.95€

Film director Sofia Coppola has been revealed as the woman behind the yet-to-be-seen print and television campaign for the Marni for H&M line.

Princess Diana's back-up wedding dress and shoes were auctioned at London's Kerry Taylor auction house.

Za

ka

ra,

,3

9.9

39

.95

9€

A fashion museum in Chile bought the dress; a private buyer took home the shoes which have the initials C and D joined together with a heart on the soles.

€

Stradivarius, 39.95€

Blanco, 35.99€

Question

Answer

Dear Freya, I need your help! I split my jeans when i was on holiday, I looked for some new ones but they were all expensive.

Hi Katherine, We have also been looking around for new jeans recently and have found the cheapest ones are from Primark.

They have skinny, super skinny, straight cut, bootleg, flair and more all for €11 each.

Where can I get a pair of cheap, dark, skinny jeans from?

Kind regards, Katherine x.

The news that Coppola shot the ad campaign in Marrakesh famed for its Moorish architecture and colorful mosaics seems fitting with what can be expected of the collection.

Coppola has previously shot fashion campaigns including the dreamy Miss Dior Chérie commercial starring Maryna Linchuk.

GOT A FASHION PROBLEM YOU CAN’T FIX? Maybe you have got a big event coming up and don’t know what to wear. Or you have recently lost a lot of weight and are not sure what clothes you can now wear Email all your problems to Freya at office@thecourier.es

The nearest primark is in L’Aljub Shopping Centre in Elche.

Freya

If you’ve got a problem, Freya can fix it!

31

Friday, December 23, 2011

91.9fm & 87.7fm www.tkofm.com email: studio@tkofm.com Text: 667 287 588

Let’s see if you can win yourself a meal for two and a bottle of wine at Quesada Fish & Chips

POP QUIZ December 23

96.7fm & 87.5fm www.tkogold.com email: studio@tkogold.com Call: 966 720 473 Text: 672 806 866

Welcome to the famous TKO Gold pop quiz! We sure did have some fun with last week’s questions.

All you have to do is take the first letter from each answer to find the name of a band or artist. Once you have found the key word, listen in to Chris Ashley´s show on TKO Gold, Saturday mornings 9am – 12pm.

1. This chap had a band called the Pharaohs and they went Wooly in 1965.

2. Born Steven Georgiou.

3. Nickolas & Valerie formed this soulful duo.

4. The late Peter Green was the lead guitarist with this band.

5. Chris Rea had his first hit with this tune.

6. Neil Young was from this Canadian province.

7. Last train to this capital city in 1979.

8. This band derived its name from a character in the film Barbarella.

32

Friday, December 23, 2011

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 3 represents B and 20 represents J, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Ordnance depot (7) 5 Pulsate (5) 8 Ceremonies (5) 9 Sycophants (7) 10 Shorten (7) 11 Fragment (5) 12 Stink (6) 14 Breed of hound (6) 17 Noble gas (5) 19 Set aside (7) 22 Illness (7) 23 Official (5) 24 Sleighs (5) 25 Boodbath (7)

Down 1 Large trunk artery (5) 2 Liberate (3,4) 3 Intruded (5) 4 Rubbish (6) 5 Tread down (7) 6 Lift (5) 7 Blockade (7) 12 Outdo (7) 13 Admit (7) 15 Large anthropoid ape (7) 16 Reviewer (6) 18 Rummage (5) 20 Cut (5) 21 Empower (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Havoc, 4 Sabre, 8 Silence, 9 Still, 10 Drama, 11 Despise, 12 Scared, 14 Scheme, 17 Leisure, 19 Lists, 21 Start, 22 Surpass, 24 Error, 25 Theft.

Down: 1 Has, 2 Volga, 3 Concave, 4 Steady, 5 Basis, 6 Edifice, 7 Clueless, 10 Disclose, 13 Agitate, 15 Culprit, 16 Censor, 18 Utter, 20 Spare, 23 Sit.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Carl or defective pen (6) 4 Forged guineas without a mastermind (6) 9 Memory loss is initially a mind numbing experience, so is academia (7) 10 Once more the topless iguana has reproduced (5) 11 Twenty keep count (5) 12 Being spotlessly clean is unproductive (7) 13 Green herbage near a coal wagon isn’t quite cricket (11) 18 A group of supporters went off Flu C ban (3,4) 20 Deal with skilled occupation (5) 22 Make improvements to me in the end (5) 23 Appreciative spectator rings a bell (7) 24 She was embraced by her Father and then hurried out (6)

25 An authentic manuscript of kingdoms (6) Down 1 Ask for part of the meal is hardly refined (6) 2 A musical piece from a potential donor (5) 3 Terrible rawness solutions (7) 5 Remove from Candid Camera secrets (5) 6 Think of a Lennon classic (7) 7 First song is not garbled Eleanor Rigby for vocalist (6) 8 Drunk kept bus cash to blame someone else (4,3,4) 14 Athletes’ messengers (7) 15 Political leader and French name Moniker (3,4) 16 A business area is abroad (6) 17 A red suit for lovers (6) 19 The French note the French spoon (5) 21 Shock Papal management (5)

STANDARD CLUES

Down 1 Rough (6) 2 Musical form with a recurring leading theme (5) 3 Replies (7) 5 Rub out (5) 6 Believe (7) 7 Vocalist (6) 8 Transfer responsibility to someone else (4,3,4) 14 Sprinters (7) 15 Term of endearment (3,4) 16 Outdoor (6) 17 Playing card suit (6) 19 Long-handled spoon (5) 21 Horrify (5)

Across 1 Cattle pen (6) 4 Virtuoso (6) 9 Loss of memory (7) 10 Once more (5) 11 Result (5) 12 Germ-free (7) 13 Plant-eating insect (11) 18 Organised group of admirers (3,4) 20 Commerce (5) 22 Correct (5) 23 Applauder (7) 24 Rushed (6) 25 Kingdoms (6)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Attracts, 7 Raise, 8 Turntable, 9 End, 10 Rand, 11 Dreads, 13 System, 14 Versus, 17 Stamen, 18 Rays, 20 Amp, 22 Operation, 23 Enter, 24 Stresses.

Down: 1 Alter, 2 Thrones, 3 Acts, 4 Tabard, 5 Hives, 6 Leaders, 7 Related, 12 Senator, 13 Sweater, 15 Scabies, 16 Recent, 17 Spots, 19 Sinks, 21 Mane.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words Ova Nape Bruise Add Pad Pane Herein Ago Pep Peer Paella Auk Red Sped Spoils Awn Sat Tope 7 letter words Cap Sea User Deadpan Dot Sin 5 letter words Farrier End Tea Bonds Sandbag Era Top Caner Stellar Ere 4 letter words Cross 8 letter words Ewe Ages Emeer Anaconda Fir Aide Games Banister Hit Ares Haste 11 letter Lid Clod Heels words Lie Ever Lends Cheerleader Oar Gore Lions Tenterhooks Ode Gush Pants Ore Hone 6 letter words

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Blando (madera, agua) (4) 3 Brújula (náutico) (7) 7 Laughs (3) 8 Pala (para cavar) (5) 9 To fear (be afraid) (5) 10 Boat (general) (5) 11 Grandson (5) 12 Tornillo (en punta) (5) 13 Bull (4) 14 Acordar (precio, fecha) (5) 16 Tulipán (5) 18 Hatred (4) 20 Corteza (de pan) (5) 22 Mitos (5) 24 Flood (5) 25 Decline (5) 26 Ink (5)

27 Hielo (agua helada) (3) 28 Tasty (food, dish) (7) 29 Island (geological) (4) Down 1 Sixty (7) 2 Llama (de fuego) (5) 3 To close (door, window, mouth) (6) 4 Motorbikes (5) 5 Almirante (7) 6 Pajita (5) 7 Bounce (of ball) (6) 15 Ruibarbo (7) 16 Tomato (6) 17 Eyelash (7) 19 Daily (occurring each day) (6) 20 Cruz (figura) (5) 21 Bit (piece) (5) 23 Melodías (música) (5)

33

Friday, December 23, 2011 Across 1 Tainted Love was which group’s first British number one hit single? (4,4) 7 Bactrian and dromedary are both types of which large ruminant mammal? (5) 8/2 Which Scottish bacteriologist’s discovery of penicillin in 1928 prepared the way for the highly effective practice of antibiotic therapy for infectious diseases? (9,7) 9 Which large cask holds a volume equivalent to 252 gallons? (3) 10 What name used to be applied to a person without employment who made money by various dubious schemes and went about smartly dressed, having a good time? (4) 11 In which sport would you compete for the Davis Cup? (6) 13 Humphrey who played bar owner Rick Blaine in the 1942 film Casablanca? (6) 14 What name is given to a spring that throws forth intermittent jets of heated water and steam? (6) 17 In India what type of fan consists of a canvas-covered frame suspended from the ceiling that is operated by a cord? (6) 18 Jamie who played the part of Corporal Max Klinger in the long-running television series M*A*S*H? (4) 20 In the 1968 Stanley Kubrick film 2001: A Space Odyssey, what was the name of the sentient on-board computer of the spaceship Discovery that eventually goes rampant? (3) 22 Which British heavy metal group, who took their name from a Charles Dickens’ character recorded, the albums Return To Fantasy, Sweet Freedom and Demons and Wizards? (5,4)

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

23 According to Greek mythology, who was the father of Hector, Paris, and Cassandra and king of Troy during the Trojan War? (5) 24 Which wind instrument, popular with school children, is characterised by a conical tube, a whistle mouthpiece, and

eight finger holes? (8) Down 1 Crabeater, grey, leopard and elephant are all types of which aquatic mammals? (5) 2 See 8 Across 3 N’Djamena is the capital of which country in north central Africa? (4) 4 What name is given to a short line added above or below a musical staff to extend its range? (6) 5 What was the surname of the South African field marshal who was prime minister of his country from 1919 to 1924 and 1939 1o 1948?

(5) 6 What name is given to a fragment of incombustible matter left after a wood or coal or charcoal fire? (7) 7 What was the surname of the first Protestant archbishop of Canterbury? (7) 12 Which heavy toxic silvery-white radioactive metallic element that occurs in many isotopes is used for nuclear fuels and nuclear weapons? (7) 13 Which British-born comedian starred alongside Bing Crosby in the ‘Road’ films? (3,4) 15 Dulse and Irish moss are both types of which marine algae?

(7) 16 In English, what name is applied to the category of nouns serving as the indirect object of a verb? (6) 17 What type of hairdo is formed by braiding or twisting the hair? (5) 19 What was the surname of the couple played by Yootha Joyce and Brian Murphy in the television series George and Mildred? (5) 21 Columbus is the capital of which state of the US? (4)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH matemáticas –maths

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

1. Chaplin ate a boot in the movie 'Gold Rush'. What was it made of?

2. In Which Sea Is The Country Of Cuba Located?

3. The river Han flows through which capital city?

4. Who founded cheese making in England?

5. Which annual race is 4 miles and 374 yards long?

6. Which was the first group beginning with the letter V to have a No.1 hit in the UK? 7. What is the correct name for food permitted under Moslem laws?

8. Into what body of water does the Yukon river flow?

9. Which Is The Largest Species Of Ape? 10. What Is A Common Name For The Trachea?

11. Amontillado, Oloroso And Cream Are All Varieties Of Which Drink?

12. Which Singer Maintained That He Did What He Did For Maria?

13. Which pop singer was known as `the king of the wild frontier'?

1. Liquorice 2. Caribbean 3. "Seoul (South Korea, or the Republic of Korea)" 4. Romans 5. The Boat Race 6. The Village People 7. Hal-al 8. Bering sea 9. Gorilla 10. The Windpipe 11. Sherry 12. Tony Christie 13. Adam Ant

ANSWERS

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across: 1 Bismarck, 7 Lenin, 8 Garibaldi, 9 Arm, 10 Trek, 11 Lichen, 13/17D Tin Pan Alley, 14 Oscars, 17 Arthur, 18/5 Kofi Annan, 20 Ell, 22 Edelweiss, 23 ASEAN, 24/7D Northern Lights.

Down: 1 Bigot, 2 Surgeon, 3 Abba, 4 Culkin, 6 Gnomons, 12 Canteen, 13 Teheran, 15 Atomise, 16 Tuxedo, 19 Ibsen, 21 Swat.

16. cuadrado, 17. cono, 18. esfera, 19. infinito. a. equivalent, b. half, c. sphere, d. infinity, e. subtraction, f. less, g. third, h. same, i. cone, j. fraction, k. addition, l. greater,

J K T P V N E Q N N T C C B O T I E O P S O R O R P U O LD D E G Q F Q O I I T G A N I A OWREUYKACNHROXR P U R C A I N D A C R TA X D OAV M E G V V C LAO H JA R X M V U R NAI HAR T V U C C B LG F O Q LO R U F I C E R OATS E R PE M U G Z U N O I S I V I D I Z N U R I W T N I N F I N I T O U T T D T AE M E D I O S LM V P E K O J M R R A I Z C U A D R A D A E B LN V N H H M MTPV S S F V R G O C C R O PAI X E Y Soduko

Span - Eng

m. quarter, n. division, o. square, p. square root, q. triangle, r. percentage, s. multiplication.

Answers: 1e, 2k, 3s, 4n, 5h, 6a, 7f, 8l, 9r, 10p, 11j, 12b, 13g, 14m, 15q, 16o, 17i, 18c, 19d.

general QUIZ

1. resta, 2. suma, 3. multiplicación, 4. división, 5. igual, 6. equivalente, 7. menor, 8. mayor, 9. porcentaje, 10. raiz cuadrada, 11. fracción, 12. medio, 13. tercero, 14. cuarto, 15. triangulo,

CONO

MEDIO

CUADRADO

MENOR

CUARTO

MULTIPLICACION

DIVISION

PORCENTAJE

EQUIVALENTE

RAIZ-CUADRADA

ESFERA

RESTA

FRACCION

SUMA

IGUAL

TERCERO

INFINITO

TRIANGULO

MAYOR Quizword

Fill It In

34

Friday, December 23, 2011

Horoscopes

By Pandora

Aries March 21 - April 19 Whenever you feel unhappy today, smile and go to the toilet. This action should soon turns things around for you. Much of what you believe now will later be shattered by an obnoxious man who will probably wear glasses and have a distinct lisp.

I Want My Ex Back Dear Rose. I was going out with my boyfriend for a year and I was 16 at the time, he was my first boyfriend ever and we got along so well. He was my best friend as well! I could tell him everything and love him so much! We broke up after year because he didn’t seem to care about me anymore. It’s been 9 months since we have been apart and I miss him so much but he’s changed and i don’t know what to do :(

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Flashing lights and fireworks are a sign of good hope for you today. You have cleverly structured an impressive set piece in your head. Put it into practise today and you'll quickly see the benefit. Old cartoons may hold a fascination for you today as you try to recreate a classic 'acme' gag.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 Your sub-conscience may decide to rebel against you today and force you to reremember everything you had managed to block out. Being mean is what makes bullies happy - don't make them have to be unhappy. Imagine what the mean spirited little twats would do then.

Cancer June 21 - July 22 Something will stir your memory today and it may take a few hours for you to resolve your sense of deja vu. The differences between you and your peers sets you apart. And by apart, I mean they're thinking of relocating you so that you're as far apart as physically possible.

ALICE La Mata

l

Dear Alice. Every breakup takes its time.

There are certain stages you have to get through, one of them is bargaining.

It is important to accept these stages as part of the I’m missing out - I don’t want normal process of recovto be a cheat but I don’t want ery but not to get stuck in to break up. I also don’t want any of them. to get older and regret not You need to avoid idealis- experiencing more things. ing your ex. Someone who This has knocked my confididn't care about you back dence in talking to and meetthen is likely to not care ing new people and I’m worabout you today and you ried that I will always be susdon't want to get yourself picious of both my boyfriend into this kind of unbal- and any friends I make in the anced relationship. future - I don’t know what to You are very young and do. But I can’t be this introthere are a lot of other verted and anxious forever. boys out there who would EMMA enjoy your company. If you La Siesta don't feel ready yet to get Emma. This is not to know someone new take good. But let’s stop your time but do not narfor a moment and imaging row your focus to your that this is the best thing past only. This will only harm you. Believe me, I've that could have happened made these mistakes to you. What if you decided that from today that you myself. Good luck! were going to think about you now!! That you tell him you need some time to process this and to figure out what you want. Do some things to build your confidence, take a class, Rose. A few months ago I ask an old friend for coffound out that my boyfriend fee... just do something of 7 years slept with my best and start building your life friend of 5 years, who I and strength. haven’t seen since the night I found out. Apparently it hap- From what you are saying pened one night we were all that it’s time to look at your drunk, and I went to bed in own life and get serious the next room, they stayed about what you want. He up. It completely killed me. will respect you more and I’m quite shy and don’t have you will feel great about many friends, her and him yourself. He is not the only are the only people I trusted fish in the sea, even and felt close too, so I though it must feel like it. haven’t left him. I love him Go for it!! Do something and I know he loves me. The today to look after yourself problem is that he’s the only and your needs, I can person I’ve slept with and promise you this, you will now I can’t stop thinking that feel strong, independent

If you have a problem Romany Rose can help you with, email her at office@thecourier.es

l

Once A Cheat...

and beautiful when you look after your own needs.

Soon if he does not treat you right it so won't matter because men will be lining up at your door for a chance to love you.

Blind date I went on a blind date months ago and really did NOT fancy the guy, he had a very immature personality (no, not boyish charm, just immature) and kept on spitting on me during the meal (which I barely touched after it being spat on) I felt so sorry for the guy that I paid for the meal, drove him home as he'd come by bus and wished him the best, a few days later he got hold of my e-mail address and number through a mutual "friend" and started the "let's be friends" game. I didn't want to be rude so was firm but polite in my answer and said I was just really busy seeing as I had my own boutique to run and felt that I'd be giving him the wrong idea if a friendship was formed.

He seemed to back off but then he turned up at my unit with his 2 year old son, just in passing and asked if I was still single, enthralled me with an anecdote about a date he'd gone on with some poor disabled girl (he was not kind about her) then left.

2 weeks later he turned up as I was closing up and leaving for the day, on a brand new motor bike, again asked if I was still single, if I'd

maybe like to catch up some time, I said I was too busy.

He's now started a new job as a cleaner in the town centre so I can't walk through without seeing him, as soon as he sees me he pushes his cart up to talk. If I'm with friends he still does it and despite me just nodding respectfully and carrying on he whips the damn cart round and tries to follow and talk.

He's really starting to annoy me but I'm a very polite person and don't know how to tell him just to sod off!!

JAN Via Email

l

Hello Jan. You will just have to stop being so nice to him - I don't mean be rude, you can be polite and still be clear.

You need to tell him that you feel that as far as you are concerned you had one unsuccessful date after which you told him very clearly that you didn't want to be friends. Say that you are feeling vaguely threatened and embarrassed by his behaviour because he is quite frankly pestering you. You don't wish to be pursued when you are en route to or from work or especially with friends and he should be doing his job anyway, not chatting to people - friends or otherwise.

Of course if that doesn't work then you may have to be rude, in which case you tell him that you feel harassed and as though he is stalking you and if he doesn't leave you alone you will take legal advice.

Leo July 23 - August 22 Many of your charms will leave you today, and you will be left feeling hollow and dumb.

Death is the stark figure in the corner that is staring at you and rubbing it's hand-bones.

Dismiss this horoscope at your peril: You WILL have sex today.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Any satisfaction you had about not having a police record, may be undone today. You're not jinxed so staying in bed all day is not going to work. The week may start well, but fall into sharp decline later on Saturday.

Breaking out of your shell is best done sooner than later.

Libra September 23 - October 22 You may never find what you're looking for, but at least you managed to find that picture of the chimp sitting on a toilet reading a newspaper. Your vision won't fail so long as you avoid sticking forks into your eyes

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Many of the best lyrics are attributable today.

Take into consideration that most songs are about love and adversity. Limericks are great, but perhaps you might avoid talking incessantly in one large storybook of tall tales.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Your ability to speak may be impaired today as you attempt to swallow half of a live hedgehog. Going to the movies is an excellent way to spend your final hours. I mean, final hours of the day, obviously. Not of your life. Relax, break out the medicines and pills, and get funkin'!

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Blimey, you ain't harf as wot you used to, ain't it? Things are going to come to a head today and either go well, go badly, or go...kinda...OK. Ketchup and Katsup are essentially the same thing. But a brownsauce is not always a brown-sauce.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Accusing your friends of dastardly deeds is a good way to find relief after losing a "wacky race". One of the things you've always liked about life is how seemingly lucky you are. Expect big changes this week, ya jammy so and so.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Metal objects may interest you today, and cause a new hobby to "spark" inside of you.

Reality TV shows are not crying out for someone like yourself. You are not photogenic and could probably do with setting your sights much lower.

35

Friday, December 23, 2011

TRELI ON THE TELLY BBC’s Yule rule puts ITV rubbish to shame

ONCE upon a time in days of Christmases past, there lay the wondrous Advent moment from on high when the great whitebearded man above would drop through UK letterboxes doubleseasonal editions of the Radio Times and TV Times on a Thursday morning! ’Twas a great moment of tidings and joy whence upon a pencil or pen would be procured for the purposes of circling which programmes would be viewed, or even recorded for posterity with a new-fangled video recorder.

The yuletide choices would be limited to three channels, which amazingly rose to four options as of 1982, when the festive period would be planned out accordingly as to what ye olde family would choose to do. It was all based around the three Wise Men, namely the schedulers of the BBC, ITV and Channel Four. Such merry times were had by one and all, as household battles raged over a time clash of a James Bond premiere or a tinsel-laden edition of ‘Disney Time’.

What fun we had, and if you recall ye olde black and white days of the sixties, we verily had the novelty of daytime programmes solely on the feast day of Christmas, as opposed to Ye Olde Teste Carde.

There was Uncle Leslie of Crowther going round a kiddies hospital to make ye children feel even worse, and watching ye BBC pantomime with an olde man dressed as wench, namely an early version of Eddie Izzard called Dame Arthur

with ALEX TRELINSKI

Leslie Crowther (left): Hospital visits

of Askey. This was followed by Ye Christmas Night with the Stars and a closedown before ye midnighte! Then, in ye glorious colour era of the seventies, the BBC Lords of Xmas, Eric and Ernie, descended into total domination of the post-turkey viewing period, forcing the evil enemy of the rival ITV clan to wave the white flag of festive surrender.

More than years later, nothing apparently has changed. Or has it?

At first sight, this weekend’s Christmas Day line-up from Britain’s leading commercial channel is shockingly full of repeated family films of varying quality (and it’s the same pattern for the following week, by the way!), with absolutely no domestically produced entertainment programming, let alone any reflection of this being a major Christian festival.

In fact, ITV1 have set a new low this year by offering no less than five films back to back from 9.25 in the morning until the early evening news at 5.10. It’s the laziest Christmas schedule in the channel’s 56-year history.

This is followed by hour-long specials of Emmerdale and Coronation Street, but then something extraordinary happens. It’s as if somebody has shoved a red-hot proverbial into the controller’s rear end, as we suddenly get a two-hour ‘Downton Abbey’ Christmas Special, which in my opinion has every chance of being the most watched show on Christmas Day, knocking the BBC off its usual winning perch!

It’s a cracking episode, and I think it will give ITV something to crow about when the ratings come out the following day. But it will be a hollow victory, as they just couldn’t be bothered for the rest of the day.

Surely they could have got Harry Hill to do a Xmas TV Burp, as well as screening the brilliant Michael Buble special on the big day itself, rather than last Sunday. It’s as if they had absolutely nothing to offer, not even another Bond film, and so we are being offered a cheap schedule that Ebenezer Scrooge would have been proud of.

Of course, in this multi-channel age and DVD world, times have changed, and the old days where all the channels would get massive ratings with the first screening of a

THE INBETWEENERS MOVIE 15 Dumped by love of his life Carli (Emily Head), end of schooler Simon (Thomas), along with mates Will (Bird), Jay (Buckley) and Neil (Harrison), decides to head for Malia hoping for "sun, sand, sex, sea and sex".

Cue crap hotels, embarrassing sunburn, alcoholic fish bowls, willing girls and a boat party of a lifetime.

Let’s be honest, you can count great UK youth flicks on one hand. So hats off, then, to The Inbetweeners Movie, an upgrade for the E4 teen comedy that

CAST: Simon Bird, James Buckley, Blake Harrison, Joe Thomas DIRECTOR: Ben Palmer RUNNING TIME: 97 min.

GENRE: Comedy RATING: 4/5

matches the gag rate of any film this summer and delivers it with the panache of Hollywood but the feel of the best of Brit comedy. If you have Kevin & Perry Go Large in your head, forget it. This is much closer to Superbad.

Financed by the death of Jay’s grandfather, the boys, “looking like the world’s worst boy band”, head off to Malia where writers Iain

Morris and Damon Beesley put them through the lads' holiday from hell. It’s just a succession of cringe-worthy set pieces - the boys dance-off to impress some girls is priceless - that escalates in embarrassment as the movie goes on.

The Inbetweeners has

always been about its central friendship and amidst the vomit and the virginity losing, the film delivers a realistic believable portrait of young blokes - look out for a touching discussion as the penny drops that university might spell the end of the friendship. The performances from Bird, Thomas, Buckley and Harrison are pitch-perfect and amplify a sweetness

This dvd review was brought to you by MOVING MOVIES - OVER 7000 DVDS IN STOCK. Delivering all over Spain and the UK Visit www.movingmovies.biz Tel 650 751 072 or email movingmoviesdvds@gmail.com

David Jason as The Royal Bodyguard

Hollywood blockbuster have well and truly gone.

But at least BBC 1 continues to treat this season seriously, and barring the two hours of ‘Downton Abbey’, will wipe the floor this Sunday with a terrific home-grown line-up.

I can’t wait to see the return of the girls in ‘Absolutely Fabulous’ on BBC1 on Christmas Night, where I understand Jennifer Saunders’ script is absolutely bang on the money.

Earlier, there’s a cracking Dr.Who story as you get your hankies ready for a tear-jerker, and much earlier in the day, get ready to enjoy some TV Gold as the Morecambe and Wise Christmas Show from 1971 gets another enjoyable airing, with perhaps their greatest sketch ever featuring the conductor, Andre Previn. Or should it be Mr.Preview?

And dare I mention a fantastic Boxing Day evening on BBC1, with a wonderful adaptation of ‘The Borrowers’, followed by a return to sit-coms for David Jason in ‘The Royal Bodyguard’, capped by the start of the second series of the genuinely side-splitting ‘Mrs Brown’s Boys’.

ITV’s only counter is to show an unseen ‘Poirot’ story which has gathered dust on the shelves for so long that a number of cast members like Anna Massey are dead.

It perfectly sums up the poorest Christmas schedule that ITV have ever produced. And they’ve had plenty of rubbish ones in the past!

that is only an undercurrent in the show.

Lessons are learned - one huge element of the show is laid to rest - and friendships cemented, although never in a mawkish way.

As they arrive in back in the UK, the unthinkable might have happened: they might have come of age.

This is gag-forgag the funniest film of the summer and a fitting end to a much-loved series. So long boys, it's been great to know you.

36

The Courier Friday TV

23rd December

00:35 02:05 02:10 03:10 04:10 05:10 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 11:58 12:00 12:30 13:13 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:40 15:30 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

Blades of Glory Skiing Weatherview Nigel Slater's Simple Xmas Rick Stein's Spanish Xmas Countryfile Newsday HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Rip Off Britain Homes Under the Hammer BBC News; Weather Real Rescues Cash in the Attic BBC News; Weather Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Only Fools and Horses Keeping Up Appearances Escape to the Country Hairy Bikers' Best of British Flog It! Pointless BBC News Regional News Programmes The One Show EastEnders The Two Ronnies Sketchbook Have I Got News for You Miranda BBC News Regional News and Weather The Graham Norton Show

01:10 01:40 03:20 03:30 03:45

Rev While the City Sleeps Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today

04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:10 Close 07:00 Postman Pat's Magic Christmas 07:25 Gigglebiz - A Christmas Special 07:45 Mike the Knight 08:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 8:30 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up 09:00 Junior Bake Off 09:30 Deadly 60 09:55 What's New Scooby-Doo? 10:20 Pinocchio 12:00 Lorraine's Last Minute Christmas 13:00 Restoration Home 14:00 Weakest Link 14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy 15:30 The Heroes of Telemark 17:35 Coast 18:05 Antiques Road Trip 18:50 Celebrity Eggheads 19:20 Nativity!

21:00 Raymond Blanc's Christmas Feast 22:00 The Many Lovers of Miss Jane Austen 23:00 QI 23:30 Tamara Drewe

01:45 ITV News Headlines 03:45 Serenity 05:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 May the Best House Win 16:00 Midsomer Murders 17:59 Meridian Weather 18:00 Britain's Best Dish 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 The Lakes 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:15 ITV News and Weather 23:45 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:50 Eyes Wide Shut

00:10 Chris Moyles' Quiz Night 00:55 Random Acts 01:00 The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo Premiere Special 01:35 Alex Zane Pops Out 02:05 Comedy Lab: Rick and Peter 02:35 Comedy Lab: Totally Tom 03:05 Happy Endings 03:50 Southland 04:35 World War II: The Last Heroes 05:35 St Elsewhere 06:25 Brothers & Sisters 07:15 The Treacle People 07:25 The Hoobs 08:15 Freshly Squeezed 08:45 Perfect Couples 09:10 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:05 Frasier 11:10 The Big Bang Theory 12:10 The Simpsons 13:10 Three Men and a Baby 15:05 Hocus Pocus 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:40 4thought.tv 20:45 Gordon's Christmas Cookalong - Get Ready 21:00 Come Dine with Me 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats 23:00 Home for the Holidays

TAMARA DREWE A sleepy Dorset village becomes a hotbed of scandal after an "It girl" newspaper columnist returns home to set local menfolk's hearts fluttering in this comedy drama adapted from Posy Simmonds's Guardian newspaper cartoon strip.

00:00 Police Interceptors 01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Wildlife SOS 06:00 County Secrets 06:10 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Elmo's World 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:25 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:10 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Hana's Helpline 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 10:50 Disney's 12 Days of Christmas: Clock Cleaners 11:00 ThunderCats 11:35 Meerkat Manor 12:05 World's Strongest Man 2011 13:05 Ice Road Truckers 14:05 5 News Lunchtime 14:10 Animal Rescue Squad 14:30 Eloise at Christmastime 16:15 I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Top 20 Aussie Soap Moments 2011 19:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 19:55 The Whalers 20:00 World's Strongest Man 2011 21:00 Ice Road Truckers: Deadliest Roads 22:00 The Morecambe and Wise Christmas Show 23:05 The Tommy Cooper Hour

YOU WOULDN’T BELIEVE IT...

Expensive typo

NASA Chicken Test

Scientists at NASA built a device to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets, the space shuttle, etc. The idea being to simulate collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields.

British engineers heard about the device and were eager to test it on the windshields of their new high speed trains. Arrangements were made and a device was sent to the British engineers.

When device was fired, the British engineers were shocked... the chicken hurled out of the barrel, crashed into the shatterproof shield, smashed it to smithereens, blasted through the control console, snapped the engineer's back-rest in two and embedded itself in the back wall of the cabin.

The horrified Brits sent NASA the disastrous results of the experiment, along with the designs of the windshield and begged the US scientists for suggestions.

NASA responded with a one-line memo: "Defrost the chicken."

She was an ass

A Zimbabwe man charged with bestiality said he had paid â‚Ź25 for a prostitute, but overnight she transformed into a donkey, the Zimbabwe Guardian reported. ''Your worship, I only came to know that I was being intimate with a donkey when I got arrested,'' Sunday Moyo, 28, who was arrested in the town of Zvishavane, about 300 kilometres south of the capital Harare, said.

He added: ''I think I am also a donkey. I do not know what happened when I left the bar, but I am seriously in love with [the] donkey.''

Understandably, Mr Moyo was ordered by the court to undergo a mental examination, AFP reported.

Sicilian police fined a driver 32,000 euros for illegal parking a fee that usually cost 102 euros - because 2000 years of interest was added by mistake.

The 2000 years of interest accumulated because the police officer making the booking dated the fine AD208 instead of 2008.

"When she opened the envelope with the parking fine, the owner of the vehicle had a dizzy turn and had to be taken to hospital,"

Dutch TV Presenters In Cannibal Stunt Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno both underwent surgery to have a small piece of muscle tissue removed for the grim stunt.

Mr Zeno had flesh taken from his abdomen, while Mr Storm is understood to have had buttock muscle tissue cut out.

A chef then fried the flesh and the pair ate it in front of the audience.

The stunt features on the BNN television show Proefkonijnen - which means Guinea Pigs.

The pair try to answer "stupid questions" by taking on unusual challenges.

The footage does not actually show the moment they eat the flesh but it does show it being cooked.

It is weird to look into the eyes of a friend when you are chewing on his belly.

They have so far refused to say how the snack, which they ate without any salt or pepper, actually tasted but admitted there was "nothing really that special" about it.

Mr Storm said he did not regret his decision but added: "It is weird to look into the eyes of a friend when you are chewing on his belly."

They insisted their stunt was entirely legal in The

Netherlands as both had entered into the pact voluntarily.

A lawyer advised the show's producers that while cannibalism is not itself against the law, the presenters or the surgeon who operated on them could face legal difficulties.

Mr Storm and Mr Zeno said there was no health risk involved as long as their flesh was properly cooked.

37

The Courier Saturday TV

24th December

00:35 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:50 The Impressions Show with Culshaw and Stephenson 01:20 EastEnders 03:20 Weatherview 03:25 Lorraine's Last Minute Christmas 04:25 BBC News 04:30 Click 04:45 Newswatch 05:00 BBC News 05:30 The Bottom Line 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Our World 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 The Nativity 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:15 Nigel Slater's Simple Christmas 13:15 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 13:30 Keeping Up Appearances 14:30 The Santa Clause 2 16:05 G-Force 17:30 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 17:50 Winter Wipeout 18:50 The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe 21:00 Merlin 21:45 EastEnders 22:20 Outnumbered 23:00 Lapland

01:15 The Rob Brydon Show 01:45 Merry Christmas

03:30 HARDtalk 04:00 BBC News 04:25 Close 07:00 The Pingu Show 07:10 Timmy Time 07:35 Justin's House 08:05 Little Howard's Big Christmas Question 08:25 Bear Behaving Badly 08:50 The Owl 09:05 League of Super Evil 09:15 Horrible Histories 09:50 Jump In! 11:10 Bicentennial Man 13:10 Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco 14:35 Pappano's Essential Tosca 15:35 Tosca from the Royal Opera House 17:45 University Challenge 18:15 Dad's Army 18:45 Carols from King's 20:00 The John Craven Years 21:00 Morecambe and Wise 22:00 The Many Faces of Les Dawson 23:00 The Best of Les Dawson 23:25 TOTP2

02:35 The Zone 04:30 The Fog 06:05 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 09:15 Tom and Jerry - the Magic Ring 10:25 Santa Claus 12:30 Coronation Street 14:25 ITV News and Weather 14:45 The Polar Express 16:35 ET the Extra-Terrestrial 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 You've Been Framed!

19:30 The Cube 20:30 Text Santa 23:00 Piers Morgan's Life Stories

THE GADGET SHOW Suzi Perry investigates 4G communications, Jason Bradbury examines products due to hit the shops in 2012, and Ortis Deley looks ahead to the concept technology that could be around in 10 years. Jon Bentley considers an advanced helmet designed for fighter-jet pilots, and Pollyanna Woodward explores systems that are set to change surveillance, transport and security.

00:10 The Inbetweeners Top 10 Moments 01:10 The Inbetweeners 04:10 Random Acts 04:15 Happy Endings 05:00 Mesh 05:05 St Elsewhere 05:55 Brothers & Sisters 06:45 Hoot 08:15 Garfield 09:45 Olive, the Other Reindeer 10:40 Prep & Landing 11:10 Charlotte's Web 13:00 The Muppet Christmas Carol 14:40 Gordon's Christmas Cookalong - Get Ready 14:50 Jamie's Christmas with Bells On 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:05 4thought.tv 20:15 Hairspray 22:20 Home for the Holidays 23:55 Bill Bailey: Dandelion Mind

00:10 Up the Chastity Belt 02:00 SuperCasino 05:05 Motorsport Mundial 05:30 Great Scientists 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 House Doctor 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:15 Fireman Sam 07:25 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:40 Castle Farm 07:50 Igam Ogam 08:00 Thomas & Friends 09:00 Milkshake! Christmas Songs 09:05 Little Princess 09:20 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:40 Angelina Ballerina 09:55 Rupert Bear 10:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:25 The Mr Men Show 10:40 Roary the Racing Car 11:00 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:15 Chef Donald 11:20 ThunderCats 11:55 Meerkat Manor 12:25 Ice Road Truckers: Deadliest Roads 13:25 Charley Boorman's Extreme Frontiers 14:30 Cars Toons 14:35 Mrs Miracle 16:25 Meet the Santas 18:05 Scrooge - A Christmas Carol 20:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 20:55 5 News Weekend 21:00 The Gadget Show 22:00 Greatest Christmas TV Moments

38

The Courier Sunday TV

25th December

00:15 The National Lottery Saturday Night Draws 00:25 BBC News; Weather 00:45 Midnight Mass from St George's Cathedral Southwark 00:45 National Lottery Update 01:55 At First Sight 03:55 Weatherview 04:00 BBC News 04:30 Talking Books 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 The Record Europe 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 The Nativity 11:00 Christmas Day Eucharist from Lichfield Cathedral 12:00 Songs of Praise 12:40 Morecambe and Wise 13:25 BBC News 13:30 Weather 13:35 Kung Fu Panda 15:00 Top of the Pops 16:00 The Queen 16:10 Monsters vs Aliens 17:35 BBC News 17:45 Weather 17:50 Ratatouille 19:30 The Gruffalo's Child 20:00 Doctor Who 21:00 Strictly Come Dancing 22:00 EastEnders 23:00 Absolutely Fabulous 23:30 Michael McIntyre's Comedy Roadshow

00:55 Blackadder Rides Again 01:55 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 02:25 Holiday in Handcuffs 03:50 Close 07:00 Charlie and Lola 07:20 Octonauts and the Great Christmas Rescue 07:45 Mister Maker Comes to Town 08:10 Arthur 09:05 Shaun the Sheep 09:15 What's New Scooby-Doo? 09:40 Blue Peter 10:05 The Slammer 10:35 The Magic Roundabout 11:50 The Sword in the Stone 13:10 Alice's Adventures in Wonderland 15:10 A Musical Nativity with John Rutter 16:10 The Prince and the Composer: A Film about Hubert Parry by HRH the Prince of Wales 17:40 Dad's Army 18:10 Porridge 18:50 The Queen 19:00 University Challenge 19:30 Darcey Bussell Dances Hollywood 21:00 Blackadder the Third 22:00 The Toys That Made Christmas 23:30 James May's Man Lab

00:00 ITV News and Weather 00:15 Carols from Bucklebury 01:15 Connie and Carla 03:10 Spartacus 06:20 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 08:45 The Borrowers 10:25 March of the Penguins 12:00 Miracle on 34th Street 14:05 ITV News and Weather 14:15 Aladdin 16:00 The Queen 16:10 Happy Feet 18:10 ITV News and Weather 18:30 New You've Been Framed!

19:00 Emmerdale 20:00 All Star Family Fortunes 21:00 Coronation Street 22:00 Downton Abbey

THE TOYS THAT MADE CHRISTMAS Robert Webb takes a light-hearted look back at playthings of the past, offering fortysomethings the chance to reminisce about the days before PlayStations, laptops and iPods. It was a more innocent time when Fuzzy-Felt and Spirograph brought out the artist in everyone, girls spent hours with Barbie and boys were engrossed in trying to bolt together their impossibly fiddly Meccano models - to name just four of the toys mentioned.

00:55 Father Ted 02:05 Inputoutput 02:15 Comedy Lab: Kabadasses 02:45 Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows - T4 Movie Special 03:00 Cee Lo Takes the UK: Christmas with All the Goodies 03:10 Ashes of Time Redux 04:45 Southland 05:30 World War II: The Last Heroes 06:25 Brothers & Sisters 07:10 The Ugly Duckling and Me 08:40 The Simpsons 09:30 James and the Giant Peach 11:00 Gordon's Christmas Cookalong Live 15:00 Ice Age: A Mammoth Christmas 15:30 The Snowman 16:00 Celebrity Come Dine with Me 17:05 Channel 4 News 17:10 4thought.tv 17:15 The Alternative Christmas Message 17:20 Deal or No Deal 18:20 Big 20:15 Ice Age 3: Dawn of the Dinosaurs 22:00 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 23:00 Rude Tube

01:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Great Artists 05:25 Divine Designs 05:50 Rough Guide to Beaches 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:15 Fireman Sam 07:35 Castle Farm 07:45 Igam Ogam 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:00 The Milkshake! Show 08:25 Make Way for Noddy 08:35 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:45 Little Princess 09:05 Milkshake! Monkey 09:10 Angelina Ballerina 09:25 Rupert Bear 09:45 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:00 Mist: the Tale of a Sheepdog Puppy 11:30 Trailer Horn 11:35 Animal Rescue Squad 11:55 Andre Rieu's Christmas Spectacular 12:55 Ice Road Truckers 14:55 Cars - Unidentified Flying Mater 15:00 Miracle in Manhattan 16:45 Mrs Santa Claus 18:30 The Santa Suit 20:25 The Christmas Card 22:05 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 23:00 Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs

39

The Courier Monday TV

26th December

23:45 Match of the Day 00:30 BBC News 00:40 Weather 00:45 On Christmas Night 00:50 Have I Got a Bit More News for You 01:30 The Graham Norton Show 02:35 The Hot Chick 04:10 Weatherview 04:15 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 Shaun the Sheep 10:10 The Gruffalo 10:35 The Gruffalo's Child 11:00 The Jungle Book 2 12:10 Beverly Hills Chihuahua 13:35 BBC News; Weather 13:45 Regional News and Weather 13:55 Morecambe and Wise 15:00 Strictly Come Dancing 16:00 Winter Wipeout 17:00 Shrek 2 18:25 Weather 18:35 Regional News Programmes 18:35 Weather 18:40 Jim'll Fix It with Shane Richie 19:10 Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa 20:30 The Borrowers 22:00 EastEnders 22:30 The Royal Bodyguard 23:00 Mrs Brown's Boys 23:30 BBC News 23:40 Weather

00:30 Victoria Wood with All the Trimmings 01:25 The Many Faces of Les Dawson 02:25 QI 02:55 Beyond a Reasonable Doubt 04:15 Close 07:00 Show Me Show Me 07:25 Something Special - A Christmas Special 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 08:25 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up 08:55 Junior Bake Off 09:25 CBeebies Panto: Strictly Cinderella 09:55 Pixar: 25 Magic Moments 10:55 Heidi 12:30 The Crimson Wing 13:45 Mansfield Park 15:35 Emma 17:30 Final Score 18:10 Becoming Jane 20:00 Springwatch 2011 21:30 University Challenge 22:00 Jane Austen: The Unseen Portrait?

23:00 Victoria Wood: Seen on TV

00:05 ITV News and Weather 00:20 Benidorm 01:35 The Comedy Annual 02:35 The Towering Inferno 05:20 Kojak 06:15 ITV Nightscreen 07:00 Supernormal 07:10 SpongeBob SquarePants 07:20 Horrid Henry 07:35 Almost Naked Animals 08:05 Fleabag Monkeyface 08:35 Monk 08:40 The Adventures of Pinocchio 10:25 Best Ever Christmas Films 11:25 Goodnight Mister Tom 13:20 ITV News and Weather 13:30 Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties 15:00 50 Greatest Harry Potter Moments 16:30 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets 19:20 ITV News and Weather 19:30 Emmerdale 20:00 The Unforgettable 21:00 Coronation Street 22:00 Agatha Christie's Poirot

CHRIS MOYLES' QUIZ NIGHT The Radio 1 DJ competes against comedian James Corden, singer Olly Murs and choreographer Louie Spence in a festive edition of the quiz show, in which they face questions from X Factor judge Tulisa, chat show host Paul O'Grady, funnyman Frank Skinner and singer Britney Spears.

00:05 So This Is Christmas 01:05 8 Out of 10 Cats 02:05 American Football Live 05:45 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind: Rally Driving 05:50 Post Modern Pastimes 06:00 Road to London 2012: That Paralympic Show 06:25 Scrapheap Challenge 07:20 The Treacle People 07:30 Benji the Hunted 09:00 The Bear 09:30 The Morning Line 10:25 The Big Bang Theory 11:25 The Simpsons 12:25 Bugsy Malone 14:15 Channel 4 Racing 16:40 The Simpsons 17:10 Deal or No Deal 18:10 Coach Trip 18:45 Channel 4 News 19:00 4thought.tv 19:05 Hollyoaks 19:35 Come Dine with Me 20:05 Home Alone 22:00 Bear's Wild Weekend with Miranda 23:00 Chris Moyles' Quiz Night 23:50 Father Ted: Unintelligent Design

02:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Meals in Moments 05:05 Nick's Quest 05:30 Divine Designs 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:50 Peppa Pig 08:00 Castle Farm 08:05 Little Princess 08:15 The Mr Men Show 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 08:50 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:00 Peppa Pig 09:20 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Hana's Helpline 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 ThunderCats 11:35 Meerkat Manor 12:35 Ice Road Truckers 13:35 5 News Lunchtime 13:45 The Producers 16:10 Seven Brides for Seven Brothers 18:10 The Wizard of Oz 20:05 Britain's Favourite Christmas Songs 23:00 Dirty Dancing

40

The Courier Tuesday TV

27th December

01:15 03:30 03:35 04:35 04:45 05:00 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 09:05 10:40 12:00 13:35 13:45 13:50 15:50 16:50 18:20 18:30 18:35 19:05 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:10 23:15 23:45

The Guardian Weatherview Holby City Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Match of the Day The Road to El Dorado Hotel for Dogs BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather EastEnders Doctor Who Bedtime Stories BBC News Regional News Programmes Celebrity Mastermind Shrek the Third EastEnders Holby City Great Expectations BBC News Regional News and Weather John Bishop's Britain Tropic Thunder

00:30 Ruth Jones' Christmas Cracker 01:10 QI 01:40 Grumpy Guide to Food 02:10 Cat People 03:20 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:35 Close

07:00 Little Charley Bear 07:05 The Adventures of Abney & Teal 07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:30 Octonauts 07:45 Mike the Knight 08:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 08:30 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up 09:00 Junior Bake Off 09:30 OOglies 09:45 Deadly 60 10:15 Camp Rock 11:45 Madagascar 12:45 Yellowstone 13:45 Live Horse Racing 16:05 Watching the Wild: Cornish Seals 16:15 Coast 17:15 Flog It! 18:00 Escape to the Country 18:45 Antiques Road Trip 19:30 University Challenge 20:00 Hi-de-Hi! 20:30 Dad's Army 21:00 You Have Been Watching David Croft 22:00 Three Men Go to New England 23:00 Have I Got News for You 23:30 I've Never Seen Star Wars

00:00 ITV News and Weather 00:15 Gladiator 03:05 Vertigo 05:10 ITV Nightscreen 06:55 ITV Morning News 07:00 Supernormal 07:10 SpongeBob SquarePants 07:20 Horrid Henry 07:35 Almost Naked Animals 08:05 The Prince and the Pauper 10:25 King Ralph 12:15 ITV News and Weather 12:25 Meridian News and Weather 12:30 From Time to Time 14:20 Cats & Dogs 16:00 All Star Family Fortunes 17:00 You've Been Framed!

17:30 The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor 19:30 Meridian Tonight 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Adventurer's Guide to Britain 21:00 Susan Boyle: An Unlikely Superstar 22:00 Fast Freddie, the Widow and Me 23:30 King Kong

FAST FREDDIE, THE WIDOW AND ME Lewis star Laurence Fox drops his nice-guy persona to play brash, wealthy, narrow-minded luxury-car dealer Jonathan, who is found guilty of drink-driving and served with an order to spend the run-up to Christmas helping out at a support organisation for troubled young adults.

00:20 Small, Far Away - The World of Father Ted 01:25 Father Ted 01:55 Random Acts 02:00 The Godfather 05:05 The Lost Army of King Cambyses 06:00 World War II: The Last Heroes 06:55 Brothers & Sisters 07:40 Sali Mali 07:45 The Treacle People 07:55 The Hoobs 08:20 Famous Fred 08:50 Little Wolf's Book of Badness 09:15 Perfect Couples 09:40 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:40 Frasier 11:40 The Big Bang Theory 12:30 The Simpsons 13:30 Five Children and It 15:15 Penelope 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Celebrity Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Come Dine with Me 21:00 Big Fat Gypsy Weddings 22:00 Big Fat Quiz of the Year 2011

01:05 Fragile 03:00 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Grey's Anatomy 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 07:55 Little Princess 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:20 Milkshake! Music Box 08:30 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Milkshake! Christmas Songs 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:05 Peppa Pig 09:20 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Hana's Helpline 10:45 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 ThunderCats 11:35 Meerkat Manor 12:05 Animal Rescue Squad 12:20 World's Strongest Man 2011 13:25 5 News Lunchtime 13:35 Crazy for Christmas 15:25 I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus 17:10 Twice upon a Time 18:55 5 News Update 18:55 Little Women 21:00 World's Strongest Man 2011 22:00 Carry On Christmas 23:05 The Greatest Ever Carry On Films

41

The Courier Wednesday TV

28th December

01:25 The Heartbreak Kid 03:15 Weatherview 03:20 Frozen Planet 04:20 Raymond Blanc's Christmas Feast 05:20 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 SPYkids 2: the Island of Lost Dreams 11:35 High School Musical 2 13:20 BBC News; Weather 13:30 Regional News and Weather 13:35 Only Fools and Horses 14:25 The Two Ronnies Christmas Sketchbook 15:30 Shall We Dance 17:05 Bedknobs and Broomsticks 19:00 BBC News 19:20 Regional News Programmes 19:30 Celebrity Mastermind 20:00 Frozen Planet 21:00 Countryfile 22:00 Great Expectations 23:00 BBC News 23:10 Regional News and Weather 23:20 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:30 National Lottery Update 23:30 Comic Relief 2011: What a Cracker BBC2 00:00 Mock the Week 00:30 The Toys That Made Christmas 02:00 The Grumpy Guide to Work 02:30 I Walked with a Zombie 03:35 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday

04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:20 Close 07:00 Little Charley Bear 07:05 The Adventures of Abney & Teal 07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:30 Octonauts 07:45 Mike the Knight 08:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 08:30 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up 09:00 Junior Bake Off 09:30 Deadly 60 10:00 The Country Bears 11:25 Madagascar 12:25 Yellowstone 13:25 The Many Faces of Michael Caine 14:25 The Man Who Would Be King 16:30 Flog It! 17:30 Escape to the Country 18:30 Antiques Road Trip 19:15 Porridge 20:00 Sir Jimmy Savile at the BBC: How's About That Then?

21:00 Top Gear 22:30 Three Men Go to New England 23:30 Dara O Briain: This Is the Show

00:30 ITV News and Weather 00:44 Meridian Weather 00:45 King Kong 03:10 ITV News Headlines 03:15 Premiership Rugby Union 04:05 Kojak 04:55 ITV Nightscreen 06:55 ITV Morning News 07:00 Supernormal 07:10 SpongeBob SquarePants 07:20 Horrid Henry 07:35 Almost Naked Animals 08:05 Fleabag Monkeyface 08:35 K-9 10:25 Countrywise 11:25 The Great St Trinian's Train Robbery 13:05 All Star Family Fortunes 14:05 ITV News and Weather 14:25 Meridian News and Weather 14:30 Grease: After They Were Famous 15:35 Midsomer Murders 17:30 Lewis 19:30 Meridian Tonight 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Countrywise Kitchen 21:00 Ad of the Year 22:00 It'll Be Alright on the Night 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:10 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:15 Benidorm

THE UNTOLD TOMMY COOPER Tribute to the much-loved funnyman who carved a career out of appearing to be an incompetent magician and endeared himself to millions.

Drawing on details from the diaries of his manager Miff Ferrie, the programme features previously unheard audio and unseen archive footage from Cooper's personal and professional life.

00:05 Alan Carr: Chatty Man 01:10 Comedy Lab: Mr & Mrs Hotty Hott Hot Show 01:40 Random Acts 01:45 UK & Ireland Poker Tour 02:40 Extreme Sailing Series 03:05 Sailing 03:35 Freesports on 4 04:00 Beach Volleyball 05:00 KOTV Boxing Weekly 05:25 World War II: The Last Heroes 06:20 Brothers & Sisters 07:10 The Treacle People Christmas Special 07:30 The Hoobs 08:20 Wilde Stories 08:50 Perfect Couples 09:15 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:15 Frasier 10:45 The Big Bang Theory 11:45 The Simpsons 12:45 Firehouse Dog 14:50 Star Trek: First Contact 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Celebrity Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Come Dine with Me 21:00 Jon Snow's 2011 22:00 The Untold Tommy Cooper 23:35 Felix and Murdo

00:05 Cor, Blimey!

02:10 SuperCasino 04:55 Meals in Moments 05:05 The Gadget Show 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 07:55 Milkshake! Monkey 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 The Mr Men Show 08:25 Thomas & Friends 08:35 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:25 Roary the Racing Car 09:35 Milkshake! Christmas Songs 09:40 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:50 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Hana's Helpline 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 ThunderCats 11:35 Mickey's Delayed Date 11:40 Meerkat Manor 12:10 World's Strongest Man 2011 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Apache Drums 14:50 Six Black Horses 16:25 Custer of the West 19:10 The Witches of Oz 19:10 5 News Update 21:00 World's Strongest Man 2011 22:00 Ben Hur

42

The Courier Thursday TV

29th December

01:00 It's a Boy/Girl Thing 02:25 Weatherview 02:30 Great Expectations 03:30 Nativity!

05:10 Newsday 05:30 Panorama 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 Shaun the Sheep 10:10 SPYkids 3: Game Over 11:25 Sharpay's Fabulous Adventure 12:55 George of the Jungle 14:20 BBC News; Weather 14:35 Regional News and Weather 14:40 Only Fools and Horses 15:35 The Two Ronnies Sketchbook 16:35 Superman Returns 19:00 BBC News 19:20 Weather 19:30 Celebrity Mastermind 20:00 Wallace & Gromit: A Matter of Loaf and Death 20:30 EastEnders 21:00 Earthflight 22:00 Great Expectations 23:00 BBC News 23:10 Regional News and Weather 23:20 Absolutely Fabulous 23:50 I Love You, Man

00:30 Sir Jimmy Savile: As It Happened 01:00 QI 01:30 Being Ronnie Corbett 02:30 The Leopard Man 03:35 Asia Business Report

03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:10 Close 07:00 Little Charley Bear 07:05 The Adventures of Abney & Teal 07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:30 Octonauts 07:45 Mike the Knight 08:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 08:30 Sam & Mark's Big Friday Wind Up 09:00 Junior Bake Off 09:25 Deadly Art 09:45 Tarzan's Greatest Adventure 11:05 Madagascar 12:05 Yellowstone 13:05 The Ipcress File 14:50 Dirty Rotten Scoundrels 16:35 Flog It! 17:35 Escape to the Country 18:35 Antiques Road Trip 19:20 Confessions of a Shopaholic 21:00 Dragons' Den 22:00 QI 22:30 Never Mind the Buzzcocks 23:00 The Bleak Old Shop of Stuff

00:20 The Jonathan Ross Show 01:30 The Zone 03:30 Village of the Damned 05:10 ITV Nightscreen 06:55 ITV Morning News 07:00 Monk 07:05 SpongeBob SquarePants 07:15 Horrid Henry 07:30 Almost Naked Animals 07:55 Fleabag Monkeyface 08:25 CITV: Share a Story Winner 08:40 New York Minute 10:25 Countrywise Kitchen 10:55 All Star Family Fortunes 11:55 The Railway Children 14:00 ITV News and Weather 14:25 Meridian News and Weather 14:30 Chitty Chitty Bang Bang: After They Were Famous 15:30 Agatha Christie's Marple 17:30 Inspector Morse 19:30 Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 That Was 2011: The ITV News Review of the Year 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Paddy's 2011 Show and Telly 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:10 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:15 Notting Hill

PADDY'S 2011 SHOW AND TELLY Paddy McGuinness hosts as three pairs of celebrities answer questions about the highlights of this year's TV dramas, documentaries, comedies, game shows and reality programmes. The contestants face a series of eliminations, with the pair who reach the final round getting the chance to win up to ÂŁ20,000 for the charity of their choice.

00:10 The Armstrong & Miller Show 00:40 Ben Elton: Laughing at the 80s 02:35 Random Acts 02:40 Live from Abbey Road 03:25 Taio Cruz: Life of a Rockstar 03:50 The Album Chart Show: Spotlight 04:05 Happy Endings 04:55 Bugles in the Afternoon 06:20 Brothers & Sisters 07:15 Sali Mali 07:20 The Hoobs 08:10 Wilde Stories 08:40 Perfect Couples 09:05 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:05 Frasier 11:05 The Big Bang Theory 12:05 The Simpsons 13:05 See Spot Run 14:55 Never Been Kissed 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Coach Trip 18:30 Celebrity Come Dine with Me Extra Portions 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Come Dine with Me 21:00 Living with the Amish 22:00 Dorian Gray

01:30 Poker: The Big Game 02:30 SuperCasino 05:00 Meals in Moments 05:10 Wildlife SOS 05:55 County Secrets 06:10 House Doctor 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 07:55 Little Princess 08:05 The Mr Men Show 08:20 Thomas & Friends 08:40 Noddy in Toyland 08:55 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:05 Peppa Pig 09:25 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:05 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Hana's Helpline 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 ThunderCats 11:35 Zoo Days 11:50 World's Strongest Man 2011 12:50 5 News Lunchtime 12:55 Ice Road Truckers 13:55 Back to the Secret Garden 15:55 David Copperfield 19:20 The Witches of Oz 21:00 World's Strongest Man 2011 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 It's All About Amy

43

Friday, December 23, 2011

AWNINGS

ACCOMODATION Small, economic family run hotel, situated on the CV951, San Miguel de Salinas. Modern air-conditioned and ensuite rooms available, 35 € per room, per night. Call 966 842 070 for reservations. (45)

ACCOUNTANTS Are you running a business?

Let us simplify things for you – accountancy, taxes, payroll services and more. We cater for companies and individuals. Established in 1984 on the Costa Blanca. Call us on 966 923 963 for your first consultation free of charge. (45)

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

ALARMS Protect your home or business with ultimate technology Alarm Systems - get connected to the professionals. Immediate connection to the police via our 24/7 control centre, with video surveillance included. Don’t wait until it´s too late. For a free quote call 966 923 963 (45)

AIR CONDITIONING

EXCELLENT RECESSION PROOF BUSINESS WITH NO OVERHEADS AND ALL CASH. 5 COLD DRINK VENDING MACHINES €24,900. 25 PRINGLE MACHINES €14,900, ALL WITH GUARANTEED SITES. 619 307 318. (52) Brand New Clothing for sale, 10.000 pieces in mixed childrens, ladies and mens wear. Ideal for market traders. Bargain price 1 € per item. Call now on 651885200. (45)

services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier.

Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am.

Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo.

All nationalities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276. Special Christmas events: United carol service, Torrevieja, 7pm, December 24, Torrevieja Christian Fellowship, Avenida de las Cortes Valencianes 68. ICA carol

service and Christtingle ceremony, December 18.

IAC Sunday School children's programme, "Angel Training School and Christmas Service, Christmas Day, 11am.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada.

Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer.

Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact Pilar C h r i s t i a n CommunityChurch@gmail .com or contact Reverend Eddie on 966 7693 00 or 650 509 606.

Reg No:2009-SG/A

CARS FOR SALE Christmas special including 1 years Insurance and Full Tank of fuel. Ford KA Nov 2006 1.3 Collection, 53,000 kms, FSH, Light Metallic Blue, 4750 euros, Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Fiesta 1.4 5dr, 2003, 71,000 kms 4250 euros,

BLINDS / AWNINGS

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday

Architect

CAR SALES

ALARMS

CARPENTER

CAR HIRE

wheels, tyres, interior etc 950 euros complete may consider braking Telephone Francesca 672 127 228

FOR SALE

met blue Tel 600 726 221 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Focus 2006, 1.6, 50,000 kms, FSH, Metallic Burgundy, 7750 euros Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Focus 1.6 auto tiptronic, 65,000 kms, May 2008 New Model, Light Metallic Blue, Stunning condition, 10,450, Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Peugeot 307 cc Cabrio June 2008, 2 litre, Auto tiptronic, 1 owner, 48,000 kms, FSH, navigation, alloys, etc, metallic blue, beautiful condition 14,250 euros Tel 600 726 221 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Peugeot 206cc Cabrio, July 02 1.6, 77,000 kms, alloys, air con etc, beautiful condition, mid metallic blue, 5950 euros Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Going home? Good selection of right hand drive vehicles for sale or exchange Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Fusion 1.6+ 2005 5 dr High Spec Model, 16inch alloys, rear privacy glass, CD, Front Fogs, Stunning condition, metallic silver grey, 5950 euros Tel 965 687 967 www.fwreurocars.com Suzuki Swift Parts 1.3 2006, only covered 26,000 kms, hard body damage, excellent engine, gearbox,

Two orange gas cylinders.

One full, one half full. 25€ each or 45€ for pair. Tel: 672192482. Santiago de la Ribera.

Ketter large sturdy plastic shed with windows, floor and shelf. 6’x6’ excellent condition 175€ 966 842 326 (41) Two single beds, both with foldaway beds underneath. 50 euros each or 90 euros for all four beds.

Tel: 672192482. Santiago de la Ribera. Buyer must collect.

PROPERTY MANAGEMENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR RENT Ref. 91, This lovely one bedroom apartment is on the fifth (top) floor of block one of the Miramar development - but don't worry about climbing the stairs, as there is a lift! A parking space is included in the key operated underground garage. €450PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

FUNERAL SERVICES

APPLIANCE REPAIRS

EYELASHS

AUCTION

CAR MECHANIC

44

Friday, December 23, 2011

Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar.

Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restaurants and bars.

Short term only. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available. €P.O.A Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 155, Luxurious Three Bedroom Villa With Private Pool, in Quesada Close to shops and restaurants within a five minute drive, and Guadamar Beach is within a ten minute drive.

Long term or Short term available. €795PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available.

€300PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 708, A lovely two bedroom, one bathroom corner ground floor apartment in Algorfa, with a spacious patio & Residents off road parking. Communal pool near by. Short or long term rental available. €400PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 117, A Lovely 3 Bedroomed 1st floor apartment on the outskirts of Torrevieja (Mar Azul). The Apartment is in walking distance of the excellent beaches and a good selection of restaurants, shops and bars. €425PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, Well situated studio apartment in San Luis.

The property has a balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Close to all shops and amenities, on a local bus route & 10 minutes from the beach. €250PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 702, A lovely 2 bedroom apartment in a quiet area of Torrevieja yet within walking distance to local beaches and amenities.

It’s also less than an hour’s drive from both Alicante and Murcia San Javier Airports. €400PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 135, An outstanding two bedroom villa with one double and one twin room on the VillaMartin golf complex. There is a very

CREATIVE CONCRETE

HEATING

DAMP PROOFING

pleasant terrace off the main bedroom and from the sun terrace on the roof the views are excellent. €400PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 04, A 2 bedroom apartment one street back from the famous Cabo Roig strip. There is a selection of local shops, restaurants and bars on the doorstep with the shopping strip only 400 metres away. €450PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 92, A lovely three bedroom apartment on the ground floor of block one of the Miramar developments. A small balcony runs the width of the lounge area above the small private garden area at the front of the property. €450PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 104, Lovely 2 Bedroom Apartment in Torrevieja, within walking distance to the Friday Market, Town Centre and the beach. Close to the Habaneres Shopping Centre and Aquapark. €350PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 151, Beautiful Family 3 Bedroom Villa. Well equipped American

FURNITURE

ENERGY SAVER

FAST BROADBAND

ELECTRICIAN

LOCKSMITH

NEWS AGENTS

FISHING

kitchen, double bedroom and bathroom. A further 2 bedrooms, bathroom, large terrace with sun loungers, table and chairs, bbq, and beautiful sea view. Short or long term rental available. €P.O.A.Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Luxury appartments, 2/3 bedrooms in San Miguel De Salinas. Floor heating, Elevator, Roof terrace with swimmingpool, from 385 euros/month Also holiday rentals and appartments in San Miguel de Salinas from 350 euros/month.

966 723 437 and 616 487 493 (48)

PROPERTY FOR SALE Detached villa with large oasis pool. Situated on first Urb. In Gran Alacant.

500m2 plot, electric gates, alarmed 3 beds, 3 baths, fully furnished. Recently reduced for a quick sale Now only 260.000 euros Call 680 333 242 quoting ref 33 Altomar II in Gran Alacant Investment opportunity…

82.000 euros. 2 bed, 1 bath, lounge diner, ind.

Kitchen, Glazed in Galleria, S/Facing, extra storage Fully furnished, Private parking, Com pools Ring 627 711 155 to view.

Duplex in Monte y Mar, GA 2 Bed, 1 Bath, ground floor with views Fully furnished, A/Con, Heating, Ceiling Fans, English TV, garden, Communal pool, for apt please call 966 699 136 to view only 115.000 ono

HOUSE CLEARANCES

PLUMBERS

REDUCED Ground floor Duplex in Puerto Marino, Gran Alacant. Now only 99,500 euros. 2 bed, 1 bath, fully furnished Central heating, glazed galleria, grills, Mozzie nets, front garden, com pools, Private gated parking, walking distance to Shops bars restaurants etc. 627 711 155 Calling all serious Buyers.

I have a 5 bed, 4 bath, 2 kitchens, 2 lounges, detached Villa with self-filling pool in Gran Alacant.

Everything included in price, fantastic Alicante/sea views. As a starting price I am looking in the region of 265.000 euros Interested in making me an offer call me on 680 333 242 Mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant 2 Bed, 3 Bath, being sold fully furnished.

Electrical Appliances included, large front and rear garden, choice of communal pools, Private secure parking and walking distance to GA Center. 140.000 euros ono. Call 627 711 155 for viewing.

MASSAGE

PETS

SECURITY

SEWING

45

Friday, December 23, 2011 Lovely well maintained terraced property situated in Mediterranea III in Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, everything included in price. Large communal pool, tennis courts, established gardens Walking distance to shops, bars restaurants.

Very quiet location, over looks nature reserve.

Private parking, call 680 333 242 for more details.

133.000 euros Beach Front property opposite Carabassi Beach 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, roof top solarium under ground secure parking, walking distance to beach Situated on local tram and bus route. Being sold fully furnished. 4 communal pools, tennis courts, bar and restaurant with in urbanisation Please ring 966 699 136 after 6pm (english & spanish spoken) Now only 125.000 euros excellent value in Gran Alacant.

Quick sale needed.

199.000 euros ono Detached property in Puerto Marina. 3 Bed, 3 Bath, Immaculately furnished Alarmed, Central heating, Log fire, Hot &

PLASTERER

PERSONAL

Cold air con, open fields to the rear, Private parking, Communal pools.

966.699.478 after 5 pm.

Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant 209,000 euros 3 Double bedrooms with fitted wardrobes 2 bathrooms, spacious kitchen with galleria Lounge complete with chimney, large under build, top quality furniture and appliances inc. Com pools, underground garage, tennis courts To view call 627 711 155 Semi-detached villa in Gran Alacant 3 bed, 3 bath, lounge diner, independent kitchen, glazed in porch, large solarium with stunning views, Private Parking. A/Con Central heating, UK TV. Only 229.000 euros By appointment only call 966 699 136 Large detached villa, large pool with electronic solar cover, converted under build, roof top solarium with conservatory, panoramic views 545 m2 plot, part furnished, double glazed, A/con, alarmed, gas fire, est. irrigated gardens Call 680 333 242 for best price Ref 30 Close to Supavalue in Gran Alacant. Detached villa with pool on 640m2 plot. 3 bed, 2 bath, lounge diner, large roof top solarium, Porch, Outside WC, 2 built-in BBQ’s, Log Fire, Under build, Alarmed, Mature Gardens, Toldos blinds, Garage, Electronic Gates. 260.000 euros 627 711 155 English & Spanish spoken.

Walking distance to all local amenities in GA Detached Villa with large pool. Decoratively tiled Garden, complete with BBQ. Est. palm & fruit trees. 3 bed, 3 bath, Fully Furnished including all electrical appliances.

Quick sale needed, 270.000 euros, but very negotiable. For appointment to view call 966 699 478 after 5pm Top floor duplex in Puerto Marina, G/Alacant 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge-diner, glazed-in porch, large roof-top solarium with views, Top quality furniture and appliances included. Secure private parking, communal pools, 108,000 euros. If you would like to view call 627 711 155 for an immediate appointment.

LIMITED EDITION One of only a few bungalows in Gran Alacant. Top of the range furniture and appliances included. 3 bed, 2 bath, lounge diner, large kitchen, leading to galleria, huge roof top solarium with fantastic views of Alicante and mountains. Electronic gates leading to garage, 500m2 plot, 10x5 pool with irrigated gardens By appointment only, ring 680333242 325.000 ono Large family Home in Izla de Izaro, G.A (bajo) 4 bed, 3 bath, stunning communal pool with Jacuzzi & water features. Children’s play area and fantastic communal gardens. Very high standard throughout,

SIGN WRITING

Large converted under build & garage, elec.

Gates Alarmed, A/con, outside kitchen and bathroom, 399.000 ono. To view call 966699136 after 5pm.

Monte Y Mar - Gran Alacant Detached Villa with 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, lounge-diner, front porch, Large solarium with views. 400m2 plot Low maintenance irrigated gardens, Private pool & Parking. Tastefully furnished throughout and everything included.

Recently Reduced to 239.000 euros. For more details call 627.711.155 Gran Alacant, corner semi detached 3 bedroomed, 2 bathrooms, large garden, enclosed terrace, fully furnished, private drive for 2 cars, on gated desirable urbanisation Monte Faro, many facilities priced for quick sale 185,000 Tel 680 333 242 Balsares, terraced 4 bedroomed house, 3 bathrooms, large underbuild, private underground parking direct to house, small gated urbanisation, directly over looking proposed new golf course opposite Gran Alacant, priced for quick sale at original off plan price 195.000 Tel 680 333 242 Gran Alacant, front line, 2 bed, 1 bath, downstairs toilet, fully furnished, roof terrace, walking distance to beaches, large communal and resturants, beach front property priced for quick sale 125,000 Tel 680 333 242

REMOVALS

REMOVALS

SWIMMING POOL MAINTENANCE

Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 30, €119,000. Two bedroom detached house with large front terrace.

This villa is in the Punta Marina area close to Playa Flamenca , Close to amenities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is offroad parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

WANTED

TRANSLATOR

Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach.

There is a terrace outside with views to the sea.

Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 526, €49,900. A lovely bright 1 bedroom apartment in the area of Torreblanca.There is a large communal pool and well maintained gardens, with tennis courts and childrens play area. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

SOLICITORS Need English Speaking Solicitors in Torrevieja?

Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, accident claims, legalise land.

Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor. (45)

WIG SPECIALIST SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer different Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service.

Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (51)

46

Friday, December 23, 2011

The ABC of football TEST YOUR KNOWLEDGE OF THE BEAUTIFUL GAME WITH OUR QUIZ WITH A DIFFERENCE WHICH A is a Brazilian playing on Merseyside whose surname unusually contains all five vowels?

WHICH B team is the northernmost in England - and plays in Scotland?

to think it up when it was founded? IN WHICH Q state is US second-tier club Montreal Impact based?

WHICH I nation is the uncommon destination Scots striker Alan Gow WHICH R city will host its second chose in August?

World Cup final in 2014?

WHICH W were the shock winners of their only Bundesliga title in 2008-09?

WHERE and when would you find Mundial XX?

WHICH S won the Serie A title for its only time in 1991?

WHICH C holds the record of 100 clean sheets in his first 180 games in the English Premier League?

WHICH T nation had identical results in the 1998, 2002 and 2006 World Cups, each being P3 W0 D1 L2?

WHICH D member of France’s 1998 world Cup-winning team finished his career at New York Red Bulls in 2006?

WHICH U, a Euro nation’s captain, quit international football in 2009 after being criticised for going out on the town after his team were knocked out of the World Cup qualifiers?

WHICH E is the formal name of the Dutch Premier League?

WHICH F has been Portsmouth’s ground spanning three centuries?

WHICH G is a former Rangers captain who was born in Sweden and brought up in South Africa?

TWO questions in one...which JK is the manager of the reigning champions of the Bundesliga?

WHICH Y gave his name to the award for best goalkeeper in an World Cup finals?

WHICH L shares its ground with Roma?

WHICH Z made one of the biggest leaps in the last FIFA rankings, moving to No 74?

WHICH N, a Brazilian striker recently overshadowed by a player with a very similar name, is a star player at Villareal?

WHICH O club was thrown out of Europe and the Greek Premier League in the summer for matchfixing?

WHICH H is the other half of the name of Serie A club Verona - the result of inviting a Greek professor

WHICH Italian-sounding PP was a tiny 52-cap striker for Canada and nine English clubs and is now manager of Burton Albion?

WHICH V, who shares his name with an essential component of a dry Martini, signed for Kaiserslautern in May from Hapoel Tel Aviv?

GOSSAGE AND MASH! BIRTHDAY BOY Mick Gossage had every reason to celebrate at Torregolf’s Xmas Stableford – he scooped no fewer than SIX prizes!

With 23 prizes up for grabs at El Plantio, competitors had everything to play for. And after consuming loads of home-made mince pies supplied by the President’s wife and coffee washed down with brandy, the Xmas party turned into a birthday party as Gossage proceeded to slaughter the field.

The course was in good condition and it was warm enough for many to wear shorts – yes, it is December believe it or not!

Overall Winner: Mick Gossage - 37 pts. Best front 9: Sandra Twentyman - 20 pts Best back 9: Mick Gossage - 23 points.

Nearest the pin: Hole 9 Terry English, Hole 14 - Sue Owens, Hole 18 - Mick Gossage, 4th.shot nearest the pin on sponsored hole 12 - Mick Gossage; Longest Drive (hole 17) - Sue Owens.

PCategory One. 1st Mick Gossage 37 pts, 2nd -

ANSWERS Fabio Aurelio; Berwick Rangers; Petr Cech; Youri Djorkaeff; Eredivisie; Fratton Park; Richard Gough; Hellas; India; Jurgen Klopp; Lazio; Minsk; Nilmar; Olympiacos Volou; Paul Peschisolido; Quebec; Rio De Janeiro; Sampdoria; Tunisia; Tomas Ujfalusi (Czech Rep); Gil Vermouth; Wolfsburg; Brazil, 2014 - the 20th World Cup; Lev Yashin; Zimbabwe.

WHICH M is the capital of and has the best teams in Belarus?

Six of the best for birthday boy Mick

El Plantio winners: (from left) Sue Owens, Mick Gossage, Pauline Johnson, David Winder, Sandra Twentyman, Tony Rudd and Alan Darby Sue Owens 35 points, 3rd Phil Brigham 31 points.

Category 2: 1st - Alan Darby 33 pts, 2nd - Reg Palmer 32 pts, 3rd - Vic Galyer 29 pts (on countback). Category 3: 1st - Sandra Twentyman 26pts, 2nd Pauline Johnston 33pts, 3rd - El Presidente 30pts.

Advent Calendar: 1st -

Pauline Johnston 67pts, 2nd - Ronnie Gibson 66pts, 3rd Vic Galyer 61pts and 4th, you guessed it, Mick Gossage 59pts. Scratch card: €20 - Roy Middleton.

Torregolf’s next game and the first of the New Year will be on January 6 at Font del Llop. The group go into the New Year with an ever-grow-

ing number of members and venues with some of the best prices on the Costas.

It costs just €10 for membership of both TORREGOLF and THE FULL MONTE – the supporters club for CD Montesinos football team. Call David Winder on 626 774 157 or send an email to davidwinder.torregolfgmail.com

47

Friday, December 23, 2011

By STEVE BOTT NO racism here - just football!

Manchester City remain top of the Premier League by just two points after Manchester United showed anything they can do, Sir Alex and his boys can do better!

City beat Stoke comfortably 3-0 at the Etihad on Wednesday night but United hammered five past Fulham at Craven Cottage.

Roberto Mancini's men could have had a lot more goals as Sergio Aguero shone alongside Samir Nasri, David Villa and the rest.

United would not have stopped scoring but for the referee having to blow the final whistle. They were right in their stride as Dimitar Berbatov displayed with his skilful, cheeky back heel to hit United's fifth.

There was a price to pay for United as they suffered two more injuries to add to their ever growing list. This time Phil Jones sustained a cheekbone injury and Ashley Young suffered an ankle problem. It will test United's resources to the limit as they go into a heavy holiday programme and the second half of the season.

I back them to be a few points ahead of City by early January, though, as United have relegation strugglers Bolton, Blackburn and Wigan to play next. Newcastle are their other opponents during the festive season, but United should pick up points against that lot even with their third team!.

City take on West Brom, Liverpool, Sunderland and Wigan so have a slighter harder programme.

Marc Albrighton scored the 20,000th Premier League goal as Aston Villa went down 2-1 at home to Arsenal. There will

FIVE-STAR UNITED HEAD FOR NEW YEAR HEIGHTS be cries to rescind Robin Van Persie's booking for diving after that game as it was a penalty – but the ref didn't give it!

Liverpool missed a great opportunity to pick up points as they were held 0-0 at

Albrighton celbrates goal number 20,000!

Wigan. Mind you, missing a penalty - won by Luis Suarez didn't help. Ali Al-Habsi saved Charlie Adam's spot kick.

That's the second point struggling Wigan have picked up against top sides in successive games. Chelsea were held last weekend. All good for Wigan's morale and confidence as they battle against relegation.

One of the smallest men on the Goodison Park pitch, Leon Osman, headed the goal that gave Everton a muchneeded victory over Swansea while nutcase Alan Hutton did Aston Villa no favours. He lost it completely and was sent off for two ridiculous fouls as he ranted away at everyone in sight - mainly the referee - during that beating by Arsenal.

Sunderland continued their improvement under new manager Martin O'Neill with a 3-2 win against QPR in a tremendous game at Loftus Road. West Brom are looking a whole lot better, too, under Roy Hodgson. They won 3-2 at Newcastle.

Bolton did themselves a power of good with a 2-1 win at Blackburn in a tense relegation battle on Tuesday night and Rovers fans went to bed singing "Kean Out" again!

Norwich looked like Northern Ireland or Mexico as they drew 2-2 at Wolves in their green shirts - although they may not have played quite like the two international sides.

Crocked Villa in race to make Euro 2012 David Villa has only a slim chance of playing for Barcelona again this season and could also miss the 2012 European Championship after undergoing surgery on his broken leg on Monday.

One of the doctors who performed the operation said the 30-year-old Spain striker would be sidelined for four to five months.

"The chances (of him playing this season) are slim, but it cannot be ruled out," Dr. Ramon Cugat said. "The timetable of four to five months is tight, yet there is hope. He has his goal to reach.

"Tomorrow he will begin his recovery,

beginning to move his ankle. In three days he will be on crutches, and in five weeks we will remove the screws."

Defending champions Spain will open their Euro 2012 campaign against Italy on June 10 and could be without their all-time leading scorer.

"We hope to have Villa back in time for the European Championship," Cugat said. "It will be cutting it close. I believe that the recovery will take four to five months, but we have to see how he evolves. I could make a mistake if I give an exact date."

Villa was hurt during Barcelona's semi-

MONTE ZOOMER!

TOP OF THE TREE FOR XMAS CD Montesinos 3 Bigastro1

CD Montesinos staged a secondhalf fightback to see off Bigastro – and Vasquinho roar to the top of the table. Trailing at taking on half-time against a team one place defenders behind them at kick-off, they hit back with three second-half goals for a deserved victory.

And with previous leaders Dolores slipping up at Grupo Caliche, the win sends Monte into the Christmas / New Year break at the top of the division.

In a game that Monte controlled virtually from the start, the visitors were fortunate not to fall behind early on as Macan (twice) and Andres, both had efforts saved by the visiting keeper. cards (including one red) to Bigastro, as well The referee could have issued a few more as sending their physio to the stands, plus yellow cards as the match was certainly three yellows to the home side. robust at some stages, but the two cautions Vazquinho rounded off the scoring after 75 in the first half were both to the home side. minutes when he raced through the Bigastro Just as it looked as if they would go in all defence, avoided a couple of crude chalsquare at half time, the 250 spectators at the lenges and slotted home as he rounded the Municipal stadium witnessed one of the stranded keeper. strangest goals ever. The visitors knocked a There was still time for a sending off and long ball over the Montesinos defence and subsequent Sanchez penalty for CD both Sanchez and Fernando chased and Montesinos, which was well saved by passed it back to keeper Cubano. As the ball Bigastro keeper Natalio. came to Cubano it took a high bounce and The league season now comes to a halt his attempted clearance panned backwards for Christmas/New Year. It restarts on the over him and into his own net.

January 8 with an away game at Albaterense Whatever Monte manager Juanpe said to (date and time to be confirmed). his players at half time certainly did the trick.

Everybody at CD Montesinos and The Full Just three minutes after the re-start, man of Monte wish Courier readers a Happy the match Andres hit a free kick from all of 30 Christmas and a Healthy New Year. yards into the top corner for the equaliser; For additional information , visit our weband then, on 59 minutes, Edu put his side 2- site at www.cdmontesinos.com , via email at 1 ahead after a goalline clearance. thefullmonte2011@hotmail.com or via teleAs the game became over-physical the phone on 637 869 602. referee showed no fewer than 12 yellow In association with CajaMurcia

final win over Al Sadd at the Club World Cup on Thursday.

Dr. Ricard Pruna, who also participated in the surgery on Monday, said the injury was the result of a stress fracture in his left shin bone that reached breaking point when Villa challenged for the ball.

"In September we found a light stress fracture in his tibia," said Pruna, who added that Villa decided to continue playing since the recovery time for preventative surgery was the same four-to-five month period in case of a break.

Barcelona went on to beat Santos 4-0 in Sunday's final. Captain Carles Puyol dedicated the club's second Club World Cup in three years to Villa, injured teammate Ibrahim Afellay and assistant coach Tito Vilanova, who is recovering from surgery to his salivary glands.

Barcelona trail Spanish league leader

Real Madrid by three points and will surely miss Villa's goals as they go for their fourth straight league crown.

Spain, meanwhile, may turn to Valencia striker Roberto Soldado in Villa's absence to join an attack including out-of-form Chelsea striker Fernando Torres, Athletic Bilbao's Fernando Llorente and Sevilla's Alvaro Negredo.

Kids are tops in trying weekend for Orihuela It was a topsy-turvy weekend for ITV Orihuela RFC with the Juniors, Cadetes and Infantiles running riot in Murcia on Saturday – and the seniors having considerably less success on Sunday.

The Cadetes won all of their three games against Murcia, Albacete and Cartagena, while the Infantiles won both their matches against Murcia and Albacete.

Winning both tournaments was a great start, but then Sunday came and things did not go quite so well.

The Juveniles went with the Seniors to play Murcia XV, the juveniles stepping up first playing 12 players against a fullstrength Murcia. They held the home team for 25 minutes and even took a 3-0 lead with Tirso getting the penalty, but

eventually the numbers told and Murcia ran in two tries to go in at half time 12-3 up.

Orihuela came out fighting (not literally), and put the home side under pressure with Tirso getting 10 unanswered points with a try, conversion and penalty. But in the final quarter numbers told and Murcia eventually ran out winners 29-13 Next up were the seniors, who were a bit slow coming out of the blocks and conceded two quick tries. They replied with a try of their own by Miguel converted by Danny. Scores were then exchanged but with the Orihuela defence under pressure for large part of the half , they went in 29-14 down, despite Edu scoring another try and Danny again converting.

Danny went over for Orihuela’s third converted try of the day, but the elusive bonus point just was not to be as the home side ran out winners 56-21.

It was a brave effort by the Orihuela players, who can hold their heads up high. Murcia were able to bring on fresh players in the second half to help ease away to a convincing win.

This coming Tuesday is the last training session before Xmas and all at ITV Orihuela RFC wish everyone a Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year.

48

Friday, December 23, 2011

WHITE HEAT!

Words don’t break bones...so why get hot under the colour?

IT'S not nice, but the school playground rhyme "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" springs to mind when the subject of racism in football - or anywhere else for that matter - crops up.

It is cropping up big style in our beautiful game right now with Opinion Liverpool’s Luis Suarez hammered with an eight-match ban after his spat with Manchester United's Patrice Evra.

John Terry is in the frame again, too, and his right to be England captain is being questioned once more. He faces police charges in a criminal case over his alleged bad mouthing of Anton Ferdinand - the brother of Terry's long-time international centre-back partner Rio. Now I am white, President Joshua Nkomo was

STEVE BOTT

black, a Chinese person is usually yellow and lots of folk are brown, whether by birth or after a holiday in the sun. There is no getting away from that, despite the PC brigade insisting we turn several blind eyes and look at everyone as being the same. Oh, how I wish things were that simple! Anyway, honesty is the best policy and my Mum always told me not to lie.

I have been called lots of things in my time, most of them not very nice, and one thing was particularly personal and hurtful. I put up with that for two or three years then dealt with it swiftly and very violently. I didn't get much trouble again!

I am not saying that every footballer abused by another should knock the living daylights out of their antagonist, although it does feel good doing it! No, turn the other cheek and get on with it. Just like their colleagues have to do when, for instance, the centre back tells the centre forward what he is going to do to his mother, wife and daughter as the players jostle in the penalty area awaiting a corner.

And if Joey Barton were to slice me in two with a tackle, I dare say I would not pick myself up, dust myself down and declare "Oh, well done Joseph. That was an extremely fierce challenge. I felt that one.

Carry on, good sir!"

It would be good if the lads on the football pitch and the lads and lasses in other walks of life could come up with other terms of endearment that are not likely to cause the racist brigade to see red, blue, yellow or white. Oh dear! There I go again - so come on let's give it a try.

It is all getting a bit silly when a website runs a story criticising Match of the Day pundit Alan Hansen for calling certain players "coloured". Apparently some viewers objected. I thought he might get in a bit of bother as I watched but I didn't lose any sleep over it.

So come on y'all. Let's be sensible about this. If you don't I'll get Harry Redknapp to come and shake his fist at you!