The Courier Week 58

Edition 58

www.thecourier.es

Friday, March 30, 2012

Read it ALL online ALL week at www.thecourier.es

SICKENER

A FULLY-INSURED British ex-pat has been landed with a €1,300 medical bill after suffering a minor stroke just because he was taken to the ‘wrong’ hospital.

Stroke-victim Paul counts cost of hospital mix-up

After the intervention of The Courier, the insurance company told Paul Woodward they would consider paying the EXCLUSIVE By bill "if he would keep the TONY MAYES story out of the newspaper".

They have now come up two days he was returned with an offer of just 400 euros home.

- and, understandably, Mr It was when Mr Woodward is not happy.

Woodward contacted Paul, who lives with his ASSSA his troubles really wife in the El Trampolin started. He was told that urbanisation near Roldan the hospital he was transsuffered a mild stroke in May, ferred to was not on 2008.

ASSSA's approved list of A neighbour took him to hospitals and therefore he Sorocco Hospital in was not covered for treatCartagena, in accordance ment there. with the instructions from Mr He says: "I really couldn't Woodward's insurers, believe it. I was obviously ill ASSSA. at the time and was not able "They have a book of to argue the case as to which instructions and a list of hospitals where patients who are hospital I should be transinsured with them must go,” ferred to. Frankly, it was the said Mr Woodward, “but last thing on my mind at the when we arrived at the hospi- time."

Paul appealed against tal I was told I needed more tests and X-rays and ASSSA's decision, but was because it was the weekend, told the first hospital had no would have to go to another right to refer him to one not on their list; that it had haphospital in the city."

He was transferred to pened before and ASSSA Santa Lucia public hospital, had refused payment in all where tests were carried out those other cases.

Subsequently he went and he was admitted. It was discovered that the stroke back for further treatment at was caused because his the approved hospital and all heart was not pumping suffi- is now well medically.

But he is now left with that cient blood to his brain. After

Paul Woodward: He was not in a condition to argue over hospital switch

bill for 1,300 euros which dropped in his letterbox about three months ago from Santa Lucia Hospital.

“They are allowing me to pay by instalments of 200 euros a month,’’ says Paul, “but ASSSA refused to cover the cost, regardless of the fact that it was not my decision to be transferred there for treatment and that I did everything I could do in the circumstances.

vate hospital and the social services hospital where I was sent."

Paul is now questioning why there is such a huge gap in costs between the private and public hospitals.

“Either the standards at the private hospital are appallingly low, or the standards at the social security hospital are so high. Perhaps they have caviar every day, if so I never saw any of it.

Perhaps I am paying for all the solicitors' fees and the bureaucratic costs of ASSSA fighting my case.

“This may be nearer the mark because I have since heard there are plenty of other people like me who “It was at this point that I have been caught out and in contacted The Courier, and some cases it the costs run when ASSSA got wind of it into tens of thousands of they offered to consider euros." meeting the bill provided the He added: “All this has left story did not appear in print. me with a very poor opinion “But now, after loads of to- of insurance companies. ing and fro-ing and them say- They appear to do all in their ing they had to consult solici- power to dream up every tors they have said that pro- reason in the book not to pay vided I pay all the money to out. the hospital, they will pay 400 “On the surface I had a euros, which is the difference Turn to Page 3 between the cost of their pri-

Striking workers in angry clashes SPAIN was on strike yesterday as workers across the country downed tools to protest labour reforms and austerity cuts.

As we went to press, unions were already claiming the strike as a success with reports of almost total stoppage in many sectors.

Yet, even before 11am, more than 60 people had been detained and isolated incidents of violence were being reported from around the country.

Several people were reported injured, including six police officers.

The most serious incident occurred in Torrelavega, Cantabria, where a woman picket was stabbed in the hand by the owner of a hotel.

In Madrid, police detained seven people for public disorder and damage offences.

And in Barcelona, parts of the city came to a standstill when a bomb was reported close to a school.

The device turned out to be a fake.

Two people were arrested.

In Murcia, a police patrol car was hit by a Molotov cocktail, while i n Malága seven people were detained for throwing smoke bombs.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Touchdown! Do I get points or pants?

TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 JUNGLE DRUMS E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Amanda Black Sally Bengtsson Rebecca Marks Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe

Picture of the Week

96 692 1003

Latest Issue always online at www.thecourier.es

NO SEX PLEASE YOU’RE BANKERS SPAIN’S high-class call girls are refusing to have sex with the nation’s bankers until they start giving loans to cash-strapped families and businesses.

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The escorts will reportedly continue their sex strike until bank workers “fulfil their responsibility to society”.

The report, which the Spanish press is treating with scepticism, adds that the bankers have become so desperate they have turned to the government to mediate.

Some are said to have tried to get around the ban by passing themselves off as architects or engineers, the report quotes anonymous sex workers as saying.

But the canny call girls did not fall for the ruse as “it has been many years since these professionals could afford

rates that start from €300 per hour”.

The capital’s largest luxury prostitute trade association is behind the strike, according to SDPnoticias.com and Russia Today, which broke the story jointly.

And Ana G, a spokeswoman for the call girls, said: “We are the only ones with a real ability to pressure the sector. “We have been on strike for three days now and we don’t think they can withstand much more.”

Legends back in town

THE Spanish economy will enter into recession again in the first quarter of this year, the Bank of Spain stated in its economic bulletin published on Tuesday.

The Bank notes that consumer and business confidence has fallen back to 2010 levels and that unemployment continues to rise.

It predicts a fall in GDP over the quarter of 0.3%, pushing Spain back into recession with two consecutive negative quarters.

GOT A STORY?

After sell-out 2011 dates, with people being turned away at Email office@thecourier.es the door, Jukebox Legends is bringing back the much- or call us on 966 921 003 awaited Cliff and Elvis tour.

International Cliff Richard tribute, Cliff-asif, will once again be joined by Elvis 2000 at Costa Blanca venues next month.

The tour starts at Emerald Isle, La Florida on April 16 before moving to Santa Pola Life Resort, Gran Alacant on April 19 and the Lounge Bar, Torrevieja on April 20.

Tickets cost €8.50 and are available from the venues, online at www.jukeboxpromotions.co.uk or by calling the ticket info line on 695135134. Fundraising at the shows will go to Help at Home, Costa Blanca.

Friday Partly cloudy High 19° Low 8° Chance of rain 2% Monday Showers High 20° Low 12° Chance of rain 60%

Spain heads back into recession

Tuesday Showers High 19° Low 11° Chance of rain 60%

Saturday Showers High 20° Low 9° Chance of rain 60% Wednesday Showers High 18° Low 11° Chance of rain 60%

Sunday Sunny High 21° Lo 12° Chance of rain 1% Thursday Rain High 18° Lo 10° Chance of rain 97%

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Ryanair in new Alicante threat RYANAIR has vowed to make “severe cuts” to flights from Alicante’s El Altet airport after losing a court case against airport authority Aena.

The Irish airline filed a legal challenge last June against Aena’s ruling that all passengers must embark and disembark using air bridges at an extra cost to the airlines. But on Monday, an Alicante court judge declared in favour of Aena.

The court decided that the air bridges are safer for passengers and that their use does not impact on the business model of a low-cost airline as Ryanair claimed.

Ryanair maintains the bridges cause slow embarking and disembarking and

so affect aircraft turnaround.

In response to the judgement, Ryanair said on Tuesday that it will implement “severe cuts” to flights.

Their Communications Director, Stephen McNamara, expressed his “disappointment” because “common sense has not prevailed”.

Ryanair has said it will “continue growing in other airports such as Barcelona, Bilbao, Madrid and Palma de Mallorca, which will receive new aircraft and capacity that was originally assigned to Alicante”.

The airline has already removed 18 destinations this summer at a cost to Alicante of 1.5 million passengers.

HOSPITAL SICKENER From Page One medical emergency, and my insurance should cover it regardless. Like car insurance, companies have you over a barrel, and it's the public who suffer every time.

“It's about time governments took a long, hard look at insurance companies, and, if they are not fit for purpose, they should be nationalised," he concluded.

UP THE GREEK FEARS that Spain could be heading for a Greekstyle bailout grew this week as economists declared the risk higher than ever.

Citigroup Inc’s chief economist William Buiter warned he was increasingly worried about a Spanish default, saying the country was at greater risk of “sovereign restructuring than ever before”, while LSE proBy AMANDA BLACK fessor Luis Garicano labelled Spain’s proposed debt-cut- Rajoy forced to announce up ting measures as “mission to €40bn in extra spending impossible”. cuts and taxes if he is to Their fears were meet tough deficit targets expressed as Prime Minister imposed by Europe.

Mariano Rajoy faced his Although some experts mainhardest week since taking tain that the total real adjustoffice – with a shock loss for ment needed this year, takthe PP in the Andalucia state ing into account falling revelection last Sunday, the enue, could be a staggering general strike yesterday €64bn – twice the €30bn (Thursday) and a tough aus“Save Italy” plan announced terity budget to negotiate by prime minister Mario today (Friday).

Economists have warned Monti in December.

On Saturday, Monti critithat the ruling party’s failure cised Spain’s handling of its to win control in the Andalucia election casts economy, warning that the doubts over the govern- country was turning back the ment’s ability to push through clock on a debt crisis that necessary financial reforms seemed to be easing and as regional government that its lack of attention to deficits have played a large public finances and rising part in the overall financial yields could spread to Italy through “contagion”. mess facing Spain.

He later softened his Although the PP won 50 seats in the crucial Andalucia stance and said he had every elections it failed to win an confidence in Spain and overall majority as opposition Rajoy.

PSOE won 47 seats.

Today’s budget will see

Spanish bail-out warnings grow as Rajoy forced into huge budget cuts

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Stricken strike supporter...a demonstrator feels the effects of police security in Madrid yesterday

Rubble brewing for illegal hotel THE illegal hotel which spoils the scenery of Almeria’s Cabo de Gata Natural Park may be heading for the rubble bin.

Last Tuesday the Supreme Court ruled that the controversial El Algarrobico hotel is an illegal structure, after dismissing an appeal by town authorities.

Environmentalist groups such as Greenpeace say the ruling paves the way for the hotel to be demolished.

Other environmentalist groups, such as Save Mojácar and Uprise Almería, have said the town knew when it issued the permit in 2003 that the project was not following the 1988 coastal protection law, which states that construction cannot be less than 100 metres from the shoreline.

Mar Moreno, the Andalusia government’s chief of staff, said the regional administration was waiting for the green light from the courts to “take a shovel and knock down the building.”

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Friday, March 30, 2012

George’s gran plan heads for the pan!

WATCHING the Chancellor, George Osborne, picking the pockets of pensioners in the Budget was like seeing a petulant schoolboy.

Why? Well, the government was forced into paying us pensioners a 5.2% increase next month because inflation had risen to this level. So, Osborne was like a stupid schoolboy, saying "we couldn't do anything about your pension rise, but we can take it off you...just watch".

Governments mess with pensioners at their peril, though, because they represent a huge voting force and are more likely than any other section of the community to get out and vote.

Messing around with pensions was a very stupid move on the part of the Chancellor, especially as it is seen as a granny tax to reward those least in need in society – the people earning more than £150,000 per annum.

During the past week, emails have been buzzing to and fro between pensioners condemning Osborne's meanness in hitting state pensions, which average just £105 per week.

What has in fact happened is that tax allowances for the over-65s – first introduced in 1925 by then Chancellor Winston Churchill – are being frozen or axed.

People who turn 65 or 75 next year will be worst affected but, in all, 4.4 million pensioners with incomes of between £10,500 and £28,000 can expect to lose out.

The Treasury has since been taken aback by the strength of the backlash against Mr Osborne’s decision.

What made pensioners even more angry was that Cameron, trying to defend the crazy decision, had the arrogance to say that we would soon forget the little we are losing out on once we receive the average £5 plus per week rise in pensions next month.

Excuse me, but that was caused because price inflation went up by over 5%, triggering the rise. That meant prices, of all the things pensioners and everyone else have to buy, rose by that amount.

The government have not given us anything extra, it is just keeping up with prices and without it pensioners would starve. Anyone who thinks a pensioner can actually live on £105 per week, pay all bills and have any quality of life is living in cloud cuckoo land. I would suggest Cameron and Osborne try it.

We who live in Spain are certainly not immune from price rises. We have seen it happening in the shops, on electricity and water charges and at the petrol pumps as the Spanish government tries to wrestle with massive debts.

I hope Osborne, Cameron and Co have a really tough ride when they attempt to get the Budget through the House. Hitting millions of pensioners to provide the cash to help the rich bring their 50% tax down to 45% is political suicide.

I have just an ounce of sympathy with the government over the problem of taxing the rich - not because I don't think they should be taxed heavily, but because of the consequences of it.

The problem stems from the other side of the Atlantic, where, for example, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney expects to pay about $6.2m (£4m) in taxes on income of $42.5m in the last two years.

That makes for a tax rate of 13.9% in 2010 and an expected rate of 15.4% in 2011.

Here's the problem. Taxes are so low in the States and there are so many loopholes, you could drive a battleship though them.

You can understand a top earner in Britain questioning whether to remain in the UK, with its high taxes and increasingly hostile attitudes to high earners, or to go to the land of milk and honey across the pond.

In America, there is still a huge gap between the ‘haves’ and ‘have nots’, and it's much worse in some other countries.

Until all that is sorted and there's an end to tax havens

around the world, the British government remain on the horns of a dilemma over how to deal with taxing the super rich.

Perhaps ever-rising property and land taxes is a fairer answer - after all, they can't put land and homes on a plane and hop across the Atlantic. And with land and homes in Britain so eagerly sought after and the population ever increasing, prices are unlikely to fall much.

Bail and farewell THE story which really got my goat over the last week was the news that no fewer than 30,000 people in the UK are wanted by police for jumping bail.

What on earth is the point of police going to the time, trouble and expense of tracking down a robber, thief or rapist and bringing him before the court, only for a magistrate or judge to grant bail. What happens? An increasing number are disappearing without trace into Britain's ever-growing underworld. Then society is put to even greater expense for the police to try to track them down again.

Appallingly, 14% of the missing accused are wanted for violent crimes and 3% are alleged sex offenders.

No doubt many of those who have jumped bail have gone on to commit further crimes whilst on remand.

Analysis of detailed statistics from 23 forces across England, Wales and Scotland show that 2,027 warrants were for specific offences of violence, such as murder, causing death by dangerous driving and assault. A further 423 warrants were for sexual crimes including rape.

Bail is usually granted unless a suspect is deemed likely to flee, commit further offences or interfere with witnesses. It can be given by police, magistrates or a judge.

And here lies the

problem because, in Britain, bail is given unless it is proved there could be a problem granting bail. That's why so many people, having been accused of a crime, are just disappearing into the night, because magistrates and judges cannot always get it right.

It's another example of Britain's judges and magistrates being too soft on people who have committed crime. It is an insult to the victims of crime and a risk to the public because these are the very people most likely to re-offend.

Compare life across the Atlantic, where, in America, a person accused of a crime is more than likely not to be granted bail - and once on remand is likely to be waiting for trial for months, if not years.

I'm not advocating that for one second, because it's possible for an innocent person in the US to languish in prison for a long time before having the chance to prove his/her innocence.

What is needed is for magistrates and judges to toughen up and not grant bail so readily, and for the judicial system to get its act together and bring those accused of crimes to trial much quicker. This way, you prevent society spiralling ever further downhill.

Milk past your eyes And now for another example of increasingly-silly Britain.

Currently farmers are legally allowed to sell unpasteurised milk to customers direct from the farm, from the farmer himself, or at a farmers' market.

A growing number of people want to buy unpasteurised milk, claiming it contains more of the friendly bacteria we hear so much about in TV adverts.

A farmer in East Sussex has won a contract to supply unpasteurised milk in Selfridges store in London via a vending machine.

But in March the Food Standards Agency (FSA), who believe it could be a threat to people's health because there is no process to kill off harmful bacteria, weighed in and threatened action to stop the sales.

Not surprisingly, the farmer and the store are contesting the bureaucrats.

My view, for what it's worth?

Here's yet another example of meddlesome bureaucrats being a pain in the backside. Every time it happens some of them should be made redundant, because, clearly, they have too much time to waste on trivia.

If unpasteurised milk is safe to buy from a farmers' market, then it's safe to buy from a vending machine in a store.

Memo to Cameron: You're always bleating on about getting rid of red tape and supporting business and enterprise. Put your actions where your mouth is.

Gone today, hair tomorrow And finally there's some good news on the horizon for us balding old codgers. Apparently scientists have found some pesky protein which is responsible for hair loss in men.

About 80% have some hair loss by the age of 70. Hair follicles shrink (come on girls, stop laughing, we know the joke about shrinkage as men grow older) and eventually they become so small they are invisible (yes, ha, ha!), leading to the appearance of baldness.

The pesky protein, called prostaglandin D synthase, has now been identified around the bald areas, causing the shrinkage, and is leading scientists to believe they can develop a cream which, at worst, will prevent further baldness, or at best restore the size of the follicles to their former glory.

So eventually, all us old codgers will need is some anti-greying cream, anti-wrinkle cream and vitality pills - and we’ll be ready to take on the young pups at anything!

Friday, March 30, 2012

Farmers still gunning for Iberian wolves THE Iberian wolf has won its first battle against farmers who are campaigning to start shooting them again to protect their livestock.

Environment minister Miguel Arias Cañete tried to extend the area in which the Iberian wolf can be legally hunted, but his proposal has been rejected by the European Commission.

The Iberian wolf was confined to small pockets of Galicia, Zamora and Andalusia in the 1970s, but has since recovered.

In 1992, the European Habitats Directive established that south of the Duero river — the creature’s natural barrier — the wolf should be “strictly protected.” North of the river, it could be hunted by quota.

The objective of the conservation plan was to open a corridor between the northern population and the one in Andalusia’s Sierra Morena. But the Iberian wolf’s expansion has increased conflict with farmers.

Asaja estimates that in 2007 in Castilla y León, there were 400 attacks on livestock. In 2011, according to the association, that figure rose to 1,800, representing damages of some €1.5 million.

The matter is a running source of unrest in the region. Ecologists in Action, WWF and SEO/Birdlife consider Cañete’s petition to Brussels to be “completely mistaken.”

Alberto Fernández, of the Association for

the Conservation and Study of the Iberian Wolf, is playing down the scale of attacks.

“It’s a puerile argument. Farmers have many problems, but according to the statistics, livestock deaths due to wolf attacks are 0.5 percent, a minimal amount.”

The problem in Castilla y León, unlike other regions in Spain with wolf populations, is that there is no compensation system for damage caused by wolves. It is a longstanding complaint of farmers in the region.

“If society wants wolves, let them pay for them,” says Pino.

Furthermore, there are doubts over how many of the attacks on livestock are in fact the work of wolves. A 2010 study by investigators from the Doñana Biological Station, which is attached to the Superior Council of Scientific Studies, concluded that the majority of attacks attributed to wolves in the Basque Country had actually been carried out by feral dogs.

Jorge Echegaray, one of the authors of the study, says that “the existence of damage to livestock is not connected to the number of wolves but to the type of security at farms.”

That is to say, guard dogs, fences and night patrols prevent attacks.

“Ninety percent of Asturian farmers don’t even accumulate four annual claims for damages,” Echegaray says.

CHARITY FUN AT BULL FLANAGAN CHARITY 4 Charities is holding a TV theme night on April 7 at the Bull Flanagan bar and restaurant in Quesada.

Everyone is invited to what promises to be a great night out – and you can dress up as your favourite TV character if you wish.

Bull Flanagan staff will be putting on a buffet and there will be a fun quiz based on TV characters past and present.

Money raised will go to the various charities supported by Charity 4 Charities – including Alzheimer’s, Butterfly Children, oncology and neo-natal care, Age Concern and Isaacs House Uganda.

Tickets are available from Bull Flanagan, near La Marquesa Golf, Quesada or call 966 712 803.

A school that really performs TUCKED away in the unlikely location of a side street in Los Montesinos, Footwork Dance School is fast gaining a reputation as a breeding ground for talent and the place for kids to go if they are serious about a career in the performing arts.

Under the expert guidance of school principal Erica Dorrill, budding performers and would-be dance teachers can take the first step on the ladder to success, with a huge variety of classes including tap, ballet, modern theatre, jazz, acrobatics, hip hop, street jazz, singing and – soon to be introduced – drama.

Former UK and Spanish-based students of Erica, who was herself a professional dancer, have gained places in many prestigious academies, including Italia Conti, Arts Educational and London Contemporary

Dance.

Many are now working as performers on stage and TV. Others have opened their own successful dance schools.

But Footwork is not just for the serious performer and the school offers lots of fun non-exam classes, too.

It’s not only for the kids, either. Adult classes in tap, jazz, dancercise/zumba and stretch and tone are proving so popular that the school recently had to extend its opening hours.

Footwork, which can be found at Calle Carlos Diez 17D, Los Montesinos, also has a dance shop which offers a professional fitting service for pointe shoes.

For more information contact Erica or Carole on 662 137 329, e-mail footworkdance@hotmail.com or call in at the studios.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

WALK OFF THAT WEIGHT TKO’s Darren plummets out of the top 20 (stone, that is) thanks to the grace of plod Top Costa radio presenter DARREN JAMES reveals how Dawn French’s inspiration helped him to slim down by 30 pounds

THE catalyst for me to do something about my mushrooming size was when the scales topped 20 stone.

I knew I had been well over 19 stone for some time, mainly because my kilogram-registering bathroom scales stop at 120kg and the arrow just stopped and groaned at the limit every time I stepped on them!

So last August, I decided to start a diet and fitness regime.

The challenge hastened when I bought an XXL shirt (my usual size for the past few years), went home to try it on, and found that the buttons wouldn’t do up.

A combination of that and the embarrassment of looking in a full-length mirror brought me to the brink of tears. So, it was an experience with a blue-and-white striped shirt that pushed and shamed me into reassessing my health and fitness.

I told my Mum that I would wear that shirt on Christmas Day – some four months later. And I did.

What did I do and how did I do it? How did I get from 20 st (127.3k) to 17st 12lb (113.6k) in just over five months?

One of the best moves I made was to publicly announce my plans on the radio.

It was the same when I gave up smoking at the end of 2005. Having gone public, I would not only have let myself down if I hadn’t done anything, but also the many listeners and friends who have continually given encouragement to my aims.

I wasn’t going to be accused of doing it just for show or effect.

My new regime began when I got back from a preplanned week in Benidorm on October 3, weighing exactly 20st. It wasn’t a fixed diet and there was no gym membership. All I did was to follow what I have since referred to as the ‘Dawn French diet’.

Off the scales...20 stone Darren on air at TKO Her remarkable weight loss has been put down, in basic terms, to ‘Eat less – walk more’.

The past six months has proved that it really is as sim-

Weight for it...dieting is a walk in the park for him ple as that – more or less! My first decision was to ensure that I went out for a minimum one-hour walk every day AFTER my main evening meal.

At the time I was working on TKO GOLD until 6pm, having something to eat and going out for a brisk walk between 7pm and 7.30pm, mainly in the cold and the dark.

What did I cut out food wise? It’s more the case of what I ate less of and more of, rather than completely cutting out anything. Off the menu went chips, mashed potato, white bread, sweets,

chocolate, cakes, biscuits, late-night takeaways and, fizzy drinks. These were replaced by jacket or boiled potatoes, instant mash and brown bread. But I still have the occasional piece of cake on a Sunday afternoon after a traditional Sunday lunch at home or out. And I never stopped eating ice cream with my favourite butterscotch sauce!!

For many years I’ve had a sweetener in my coffee. I never put salt on food and I don’t eat fruit. However, I do enjoy a strawberry or two when in season!

I’ve continued to eat all

meats and fish and curries and my favourite mint burgers and salmon parcels. I probably eat more vegetables than before, but not fresh – they are frozen.

I rarely have salad ingredients, although with the summer upon us I probably will add them to the diet.

Almost all the food I eat is from the freezer or chiller cabinets of the supermarket.

I still drink alcohol, primarily whisky and water with ice, or vodka and grapefruit juice. No beer or fizz - but I occasionally have a glass of wine or three.

As for water, I rarely drink it. And milk - never!

There have been small but significant alterations to my eating habits, but THE principal change to my routine is that ONE HOUR WALK A DAY! Too many people have paid fortunes over the years to lose weight by going on faddy diets and regimes and then complained that they don’t work.

I’m certain that if I’d merely changed the menu and continued with my sedentary lifestyle away from those three hours behind the microphone, my loss would have been minimal.

I’ve also kept a weight chart (I get on the scales every other day), and I find even the slightest change in the right direction inspiring and convincing.

I set a target of losing four stone in a year, with 16 stone the aim. My official ideal weight for my age and height (51 and 6ft 2in) is a maximum of 88k – or 15st 8lbs.

My next target is to lose another stone and to be 16st 13lbs by July 1.

That will leave the final stone for the final three months until early October.

AL-QAEDA ‘LIBRARIAN’ BOOKED SPANISH police arrested a key alQaeda figure in Valencia on Tuesday.

The suspect, Mudhar Hussein Almalki, known within al-Qaeda as The Librarian, was responsible for running internet recruitment campaigns for the terrorist group.

Spanish Interior Minister Jorge Fernandez Diaz said the suspect “administered one of the world’s most important jihadist forums”, dedicated to recruiting and indoctrinating Islamic terrorists.

“He spread jihadist ideas and worked to recruit and arrange trans-

portation of possible jihadists to Afghanistan and other countries where terrorism is very active,” Fernandez said.

The minister added that the case was not linked to that of Mohamed Merah, the Toulouse murderer, but he added that it was internet forums such as those administered by Almalki that indoctrinated Merah.

Almalki was a resident of Valencia but was born in Jordan and has Saudi citizenship. He lived with his wife and 15-year-old daughter in the Torrefiel district of Valencia.

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A TWO-DAY horseriding event will take place at Finca Montana (CV912 Almoradi to Rafal) next Saturday, April 4.

It will include dressage classes - basic to advanced - plus a pas-de-deux to music.

Sunday April 8 will feature showjumping, a gymkhana and an Easter Bonnet parade (with or without a horse), plus a tack shop. Refreshments will be available.

Dressage entries must be in by Friday April 6. For more information, call Denise on 672806098. A great day out for all the family - spectators welcome, no charge.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

HAVE you ever wondered how you’d react if you came home to find your house besieged by fire, police and ambulances?

Well, I almost found out the other night.

I came around the bend at the top of my road to see an army of emergency vehicles all but blocking the next street – and around 20 local policemen, bomberos and paramedics milling around.

Since I know most of the people in the street,my first thought was that someone had died or, worse still, been murdered (better still with my Editor’s hat on!)

The reality was that my Spanish friend Teresa Iglesias (pictured) had made an emergency call for help after snapping her hipbone and being unable to get to the locked front door to alert neighbours.

The hip had been dodgy for ages and finally gave way. And Teresa would prob-

Teresa’s key to survival ably still be lying there in agony had her mobile phone not been on the table next to her.

Since the only person with a spare key was Teresa’s son – and he’s in London - the only solution was to get the door smashed down.

They bomberos had just finished the job when I turned up with my entourage, all four of them rather merry.

It wasn’t the time for giggling but we were perhaps a little irreverent as Teresa, in great pain, was lifted into an ambulance on a stretcher - and driven off into the night towards Torrevieja Hospital.

A date with a surgeon and three days later, she was back in the real world, bolted together by a row of screws in her right femur and a Zimmer frame for sprinting practice.

I caught up with Teresa this week, a couple of weeks into Zimmer time. And the 66-year-old divorcee’s first thought was to ask me to warn those who live alone to make sure that at least one neighbour has a spare set of keys to their house.

Her second concern is to warn lone residents to ensure that they ALWAYS have a mobile within reach.

Teresa’s €1500 bill for damage repairs is bad enough. But she cautioned: ‘‘It is a lesson for everyone. Make sure someone has a spare set of keys at all times...you never know what might happen.

“It never dawned on me before to give keys to my daughter. Now I will make sure she always has them.’’

As someone who was also living alone, I’ve found the perfect answer - a lodger who loves cooking and cleaning. He’s also an undertaker by profession, so no danger of any mistakes if my heart decides to stop for a breather.

BEYOND A SMOKE DO you detect signs of Spain’s long-overdue legislation to curb the fag brigade going up in smoke?

Even the Guardia are at it as Spain starts to light up again

I certainly do - though I did suggest at the time the anti-smoking laws were tightened in January 2011 that tobacco-obsessed Spaniards would not observe it.

I’ve also been horrified recently that some Brits seem happy to risk a fine of up to €600,000 (as well as an horrendous death) by either smoking illegally themselves – A SMOKING or, in the case of some bar and business owners, allowing people to light up in enclosed bars, restauGUN...lighting up in rants and even offices. a public place could Clearly these people are playing with fire - both litcost you a €600,000 erally and metaphorically. They don’t seem to realise fine. But are the it only takes one puffed-off colleague or customer to police bothered? turn them in...and they could be relieved of every cent they own. At least, that’s what the law says.

Realistically, we all know that the Spanish police and bureaucrats are about as straight as Julian Clary and Alan Carr pairing up with the Kray twins on Strictly Kill Dancing. And since the protectors of the state smoke just as heavily as its citizens, the words ‘nudge nudge, wink wink, puff puff’ come to mind.

Last weekend, a friend and I sat in the glass-fronted dining area of an upmarket, sea-front restaurant (I’m not saying where) and ordered a late lunch. ‘‘It is permitted for people to smoke,’’ he countered, pointSince the pullback roof was closed, we naturally assumed ing to a tiny gap between the slats of the removable roof. the area was non-smoking. Until, that is, we noticed ashtrays (Well, he indicated a gap – though I couldn’t actually see it). on the tables.

To add fire to the fuel, three members of a loud, ignorant “We have ventilation and air conditioning, so it is not a probgroup of Spaniards proceeded to manipulate a suspicious- lem.’’

Now, either I have got it all wrong, or the law brought in on looking substance into a trio of pathetically thin roll-ups and January 2, 2011, banned smoking in enclosed public places. to set them alight.

Within seconds, my pal and I were being passively poi- In bars and restaurants the exception was to be establishments with a maximum of two walls or without a roof. soned via noise and nostrils combined.

Since diners in this particular restaurant are visible to “How come you allow smoking?’’ I asked a waiter. ‘’The every passer-by, I can only assume that the police choose to room is closed in.’’

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ignore a seemingly blatant flouting of the law. Or maybe there’s some obscure small print which frees the restaurant management of compliance?

There is, of course, another possibility…but I wouldn’t dream of suggesting anyone in Spain is corrupt.

Non-observance of the law is even worse in some places. A few days ago, for instance, a non-smoking friend went into a local Spanish bar for an early-morning coffee and was greeted by the sight of two Guardia Civil officers smoking away next to people eating breakfast.

“It goes on all the time,’’ my pal assured me, adding: “Personally, I wish smoking was allowed in set smoking areas in bars but not in restaurants or eating areas.’’

Sounds to me like they don’t need a law for that...they’ve designated the smoking bit already.

So much for the Spanish - what about the Brits who tell the legislators to go to blazes? The people who would not dare to defy the law in the UK, but seem to think it’s OK to bend the rules in Spain?

One publican admitted to me that when it’s cold, he takes a chance in the evenings by allowing smoking in the closedin extension to his bar near Torrevieja.

“I know I’m taking a risk,’’ he said. “But my customers want to smoke and I don’t want to send them out into the road.’’

On the contrary, I could give him 600,000 reasons why he SHOULD send them out into the road.

I’m even more amazed by the smoker who lights up regularly in the open-plan office in which he works, just yards from his non-smoking boss and the entrance door.

Since smoke rises, the fumes drift to the office upstairs, not that the fumador is bothered. His defiance, despite the fact that the office’s few other addicts go outside to indulge their habit, astounds me as much as the fact that no one has made an issue of it. At least, not yet.

I just hope the person concerned sees the light before the law moves in. Or, worst-case scenario, a misplaced dog-end sets fire to the building and his boss suffers a fate worse than debt.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Friday, March 30, 2012

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Friday, March 30, 2012

LET’S BE FRANK, IT ISN’T SINATRA

'YOU'RE looking a bit pensive,' Mrs S observed the other day.

'Me, pensive?' I replied. 'Nah. I was just having a think.'

'Oh,' said Mrs S, apparently confused.

She toddled off into the kitchen to make a brew and I reached for the dictionary to look up the word pensive.

'Here,' Mrs S said, handing me an empty mug. 'Add your own tea bag, sugar, milk and water. I never know how you like it.'

'I have reached a milestone and I'm not sure which way to turn,' I announced solemnly.

'I told you that sat nav was no good,' said Mrs S. 'Please, I'm being serious,' I said. 'I am considering giving up going to the pub.'

Mrs S blanched. 'Right. Don't move. I'll phone the doctor immediately.

'Mind you, I suspect the doc is still miffed after you barged in last week claiming you'd been stricken with Uncombable Hair Syndrome.'

'Just listen to me,' I urged. 'Fetch me another empty mug of tea and I'll tell you what happened.

'My story begins many years ago. No, sorry, that was something else. This all happened yesterday . . .'

I was seated at the bar with my fellow members of the pub discussion group when Dave the barman made an announcement.

'There are going to be some changes made. In an attempt to attract a more diverse clientele than the bunch of jaded boozers I see slumped before me, I am going to install an automated music-playing device.'

'Not a jukebox?' I asked horrified.

'In a word, yes,' said Dave the barman.

'Over my ale-sozzled body,' I vowed.

'No problem,' said Dave. 'I'll just step around your prostrate form. It won't be for the first time.'

I looked over at my fellow customers but they were either too stunned or too comatose to take part in the discussion.

'Look,' said Dave the barman. 'We need to infuse some new vibrancy into

this hostelry. A jukebox will bring in younger and thus more dynamic customers.'

'No,' I groaned. 'I refuse to share my social hours with that modern junk they call music thumping away tunelessly in the background.

'I'll have you know I grew up to the sounds of Sinatra and other singers of his ilk.

'And later on, as a pimply adolescent, I would strut my funky stuff to The Beatles.

'I do admit however that these days my stuff is pretty much funkless.'

One of my fellow boozers forced open his eyelids.

'Was this in New York or California?'

'Huh?' 'You said you grew up with Frank Sinatra. What was Ol' Blue Eyes like to live with?'

'Dave!' I called to the barman. 'Throw Ol' Red Eyes a packet of pork scratchings and tell him to concentrate.'

I turned to the same dozy member of the pub discussion group.

'What I meant was that I would go to bed between 11 and 12 every night and listen to my Sinatra records. It was bliss.'

And that gave me an idea. 'Hey, Dave!' I called to the barman. 'I still know all those songs.

'I say we forget the jukebox and I'll perform in the pub a couple of nights a week. I take it you are licensed for live entertainment.'

Dave the barman shrugged. 'I've heard you sing. Believe me, a live entertainment licence does not apply in your case.'

Ol' Red Eyes tried to focus on me again.

'Wow!' he declared.

'You must have had a big bed when you were a kid.'

'Huh?'

'You said you went to bed between 11 and 12. Now that's a lot of people sharing the same sleeping accommodation.

Did you have to leave a bookmark when you got up in the night to go to the loo?'

I put my head in my hands. 'I can't take much more of this,' I moaned. 'Please deliver me from this obtuse hell.'

Dave the barman and company took absolutely no notice of my entreaty.

'I'll tell you what else we can do when we get the jukebox in,' Dave said. 'We can have theme nights.

'For example, I could load the machine with Spanish songs and we men could dress in tight black trousers and short jackets while the ladies could wear exquisite frilly flamenco frocks.'

'But no self-respecting senorita would ever come in here,' I pointed out.

'Ah-ha,' said Dave the barman. 'But they will when I install the jukebox.'

'In that case,' I sighed, 'I'm handing in my notice. Never again shall I return to this public house which I considered my second home.'

'It was always your FIRST home,' choked Dave the barman. 'And I shall miss you.'

I slid off my bar stool, slunk out of the pub and sloped off home . . .

'Well,' said Mrs S, bringing us back to the present. 'That was almost an interesting story. So what are you going to do?'

'I'm going to watch the telly. West Side Story's on. I tell you, after all the low-down contemptible stuff I had to put up with at the pub yesterday, a dose of cinematic open gang warfare will make a refreshing change.'

Noting my anger, Mrs S observed: 'You really are ready to rumble, aren't you.'

'Yes,' I nodded. 'It must have been the bran flakes I ate this morning.'

And then the phone rang. It was Dave the barman to tell me he'd changed his mind.

'It was Ol' Red Eyes and the rest of the glee club,' he explained. 'They said that if I didn't drop the jukebox plan and get you back here they would withdraw their patronage and boycott the pub.

'Although an occasional cull of customers could prove beneficial, I decided I couldn't do without the business.

Anyway, friend David, I shall see you tomorrow. The first pint is on me.'

I put down the phone, smiled a smug smile and in a gesture of pure contrariness started to whistle Y Viva España.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH LESSON 13 - The verb SER HERE are the answers from last week: I am English – SOY ingles/a: He is from Scotland – Él ES de escocia: She is tall – Ella ES alta: Brad Pitt is an actor – Brad Pitt ES un actor: The car is brown – El coche ES rojo: The chair is mine – La silla ES mia: The banana is yellow – La plátano ES Amarillo: I am a student – SOY estudiante.

Next, an apology. The Spanish words Yo SOY de Londres (I am from London) appeared in last wek’s lesson as just Yo SO, which I guess some of you spotted.

This week we are learning the other way to say TO BE in Spanish. The verb TO BE is ESTAR. Here is the verb table:

Situations that use ESTAR LOCATION Probably the most difficult to remember because as mentioned last week, ESTAR relates to non permanent states, is locations. Because Paris will always be in France, you may be forgiven for thinking it uses SER - but it doesn´t. ALL locations use ESTAR whether temporary or permanent.

ESTOY en el comedor – I am in the dining room ¿Dónde estás? - Where are you?

Londres ESTÁ en Inglaterra - London is in England.

MOOD Our moods, unlike our personality traits, can change from one minute to the next, one minute you can be happy the

next sad.

ESTOY feliz – I am happy Ellos ESTÁN tristes – They are sad Ella ESTÁ de buen humor – She is in a good mood

PHYSICAL CONDITION Like your moods, how you are feeling physically can change quickly.

Ella ESTÁ bien – She is fine ESTAMOS enfermos – We are ill Ellos ESTÁN cansados – They are tired RESULT OF ACTION This refers to what you are physically doing, even being dead which according to most is about as lasting as you can get takes ESTAR because of the action of being alive.

ESTOY sentado – I am seated ESTÁS de pie – You are standing La mosca ESTÁ muerta – The fly is dead Estos televisores ESTÁN dañados – These TV sets are damaged.

UNNATURAL COLOUR OR CONDITION When you are ill your face may turn green, and, unless you are from another planet, this colour will not be your natural colour,. Bananas turn black, etc. Anything that has changed from the colour they originally were or are imagined to be will use ESTAR. El cielo ESTÁ gris – The sky is grey

Las manos ESTÁN sucias – The hands are dirty. Él ESTÁ feo con esos pantalones – He is ugly in those trousers GOING FROM THE GENERAL TO THE PARTICULAR If you are talking in general, for example apples are the best fruit, which would use SER to the particular; This apple is the best I have ever had - ESTAR Este manzana ESTÁ muy bueno – This apple is very good Este pescado ESTÁ delicioso – This fish is delicious So, now we know when to use which verb and we can start making basic statements and sentences, as we grow our vocabulary we find we also gain in confidence and are willing to try more and more. There is no substitute for getting out there and using your newly found words and trying to make sentences As you progress and learn more and more words so your confidence will grow and speaking and understanding Spanish becomes easier.

Your homework for this week contains sentences using either SER or ESTAR. If in doubt, SER is permanent and ESTAR temporary, but remember the exceptions.

Homework: Translate into Spanish, you may need your dictionary for some of the words: It is summer, I am good, How are you?, George Clooney is an actor, The dogs are in the kitchen, The book is mine, What time is it?, Cardiff is in Wales, This chicken is very good, The car is green, Why are you here? What is this? (This = Esto), Brazil is in South America.

Have fun with your Spanish this week, next week will be a week of revision so keep going over past lessons, which I hope you´re keeping and next week’s lesson will be a breeze. There are plenty of Spanish willing to help you improve your language and also lots of good teachers out here on the Costa Blanca, who, for a few euros will show you a difference within a few weeks.

Having said that, I hope you are enjoying learning with me every week in THE COURIER.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

WHY DO THEY DO THAT? Top dog psychologist PETER SINGH writes exclusively for The Courier. Check out www.thedogyouneed.com or email Peter at peter@thedogyouneed.com

FOX ON THE RUN My disappearing terrier has to stay on the lead

HELLO PETER: I have been reading with interest your article in The Courier about dog behaviour. First, let me tell you about myself.

I have been living full time in Spain for almost 12 years. I came here with my beloved Airedale, Rosie, and whilst here I bought a Wire Fox Terrier. Rosie died in 2004 and my little fox died whilst I was away with him in England last August. On my return home to Spain I knew I needed another dog and so I adopted a rescue Fox Terrier from a dog charity. He is absolutely gorgeous, very laid back, very loyal and does nothing destructive.

The problems I have with him is that he is an absolute nightmare on the lead. I have taken to putting a halter on him which I do not like doing. But it does help when walking him, as he pulls excessively which is no good for me as I have bad knees.

The other problem is that he is very aggressive if he sees another dog. Whether he sees it as a threat to me or himself, I do not know.

I cannot let him off the lead for a good run as he has run away twice and could cause an accident so he has always to be on the lead. He stayed in kennels whilst I was away for a few days at Christmas and they said he was very good with the other dogs. But he seems frightened of big dogs.

JANETTE BLAKELEY

My Portu-tease cry baby’s barking mad

The Dog - the Guardian Angel for humans, says Peter

I RECENTLY homed a Portuguese Podengo Medio from Spain; he is around two years old. Outside, on walks, he is absolutely terrified of dogs that are bigger than him! He starts crying as soon as he sees them and then starts barking at them and shows his teeth! I know this is pure fear as if I take him close to meet the other dog, he won’t get anywhere near them until we have been talking for a while the other dog has lost interest in him. Then he will then sneak up behind to have a quick sniff! He isn't even fond of little dogs outside though he will sniff noses with them - but only for a second.

If he sees a dog in the distance that we aren't going to pass, he will bark at it and jump towards the dog like he wants to chase.

VERITY THORNLEY

q

PETER REPLIES: Hi Verity, He won't be scared of big dogs and not of small dogs. Dogs don't see size, just energy. The best way to get your dog used to other dogs is by walking with new dogs he does not know. He will then become used to other dogs as walking together brings about a calm 'pack' feeling.

That is, of course, if the dogs he is walking with are balanced.

Also make sure you are aware of your own energy.

If you get nervous and anxious when you are out with him, he will pick this up as you being unstable. If you get frustrated or angry, he will pick this up as you being weak. That means he will know you are not showing leadership qualities and he can't rely on you to take him through this positively.

If he starts to bark when next out, correct him by gently tugging the lead to the side and making a correction sound. But make sure you are calm. Dogs are our mirrors, after all. I hope this helps.

I HAVE a German Shepherd l (Chica) who was two on March 10. When I take her out she barks at anything and everything, whether it is a person, animal, bicycle, scooter, carrier bags anything, she sounds aggressive but she is not.

As soon as I take her to see what it is that she is barking at, she is OK. Once we have gone past that obstacle, she starts again.

Chica also has this bad habit of jumping up at people. I have asked people to ignore her or turn their back on her, but it doesn't seem to make any difference. Please can you help me.

DIANE PETER REPLIES: This sounds to me like a build-up of frustration due to a lack of exercise, along with the fact that you are also probably getting nervous too when Chica sees the bicycle, scooter etc. Your nerves and anxiety will then be passed on to her.

As always you have to work on giving off a genuine calm energy.

Try giving Chica a more strenuous workout when out with her and also giving her mentally stimulating toys for indoors.

A selection of these can be found on my website www.thedogyouneed.com and also in all good large pet stores in Spain.

q

q

PETER REPLIES: Hi Janette, First of all, you need to make sure that when you put the lead on your dog and when he leaves the house for a walk, he is calm and not excited, as you will then be rewarding the wrong state of mind. If you have friends or neighbours who have dogs, it would be great to take him on a walk with them, as this is an ideal way for dogs to get use to other dogs. Overall here, it sounds like you are giving him a lot of love but little in the way of rules and boundaries. As long as you stay calm and you mean what you are asking him, he will listen. Do not show any negative human emotions, such as anger, frustration, nerves and anxiety. And good luck.

Jumping Chica’s short of exercise

WE have recently taken a new dog from a rescue centre. He is very nervous as he was in the centre from a puppy and is now four years old. He comes to my wife but rarely comes to me. I think it is men in general he distrusts.

We don’t want to force him into anything as we think it will make him even more nervous. We live out in the country so there are plenty of nice walks which he really seems to like. My wife has to get the lead on him as I think it would take me ages. Our other dog comes in the house but although he comes in the kitchen it is a fleeting visit - a few seconds only. Anything would be helpful.

RICHARD TREGONING PETER REPLIES: Hi Richard, With a nervous dog it is best to ignore him and give him his space, until he is ready to approach you. Also, don’t give him affection when he is showing this nervous behaviour as you will be nurturing the wrong state of mind.

Have patience and you will give him the confidence to approach you without any pressure.

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Exercising your dogs twice each day is vital for their well-being

Friday, March 30, 2012

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Unmissable - free blanket trips that are pure Serenity THE Courier was recently contacted by a newly formed British company here on the Costa Blanca called Serenity Sleep Systems Ltd, and invited to a free day out!

The company offers a choice of free excursions (Guadalest, Algar Falls and Calpe), picking up from various points between Torrevieja and Gran Alacant.

“So,’’ we hear you ask, “why would anyone offer a free excursion?”

Well, the team at Serenity is headed by Alan Dowling and Andrew Clayton, both guys having had many years experience in customer care and knowing what makes clients happy and more importantly what doesn’t!

And they explained that they were offering a fresh approach to a free Blanket Trip.

For those of you unaware of what a Blanket Trip is, included as part of your Free day out is a demonstration showing a full range of Pure Merino Wool Products designed to improve your health and quality of sleep After leaving Torrevieja, accompanied by one of Serenity’s knowledgeable guides, we headed for their demonstration rooms just outside Altea, where we were met by the rest of the Serenity team and given a glass of bucks fizz.

The demonstration is guaranteed to be only 30 minutes long – and it flies by as head demonstrator Gail not only knows her stuff but intersperses the talk with jokes and anecdotes with a bit of audience participation thrown in. It gave us all a good laugh, whilst at the same time we learned about the range and benefits of Serenity’s products.

Actually, the talk only lasted 28 minutes. There is then an opportunity to ask questions and decide if you want to buy any of the many products on offer, ranging from a pair of wool insoles at 5€ up to a full mattress and bed set which Serenity guarantee is cheaper than their nearest rivals, but still offers excellent quality. And I can assure you there was no “hard sales pitch” - just friendly knowledgeable staff.

After the demonstration we were whisked off in our airconditioned coach to Guadalest for the rest of the day, accompanied by Sue and Lou, Serenity’s cheerful knowledgeable local guides.

We all agreed that it was a great day out. So whether you are a seasoned blanket tripper or a novice, give them a call on (0034) 677 107 250 and be ready for a fun and enjoyable day out.

LÍNEA DIRECTA, THE BEST CAR INSURANCE FOR EXPATRIATES Línea Directa offers its 70,000 customers residing in Spain the most complete car insurance on the market, with services available entirely in English, which they can take advantage of by making just one phone call at a time which is convenient for them. Here are just a few of the services available offering Expatriates exclusive benefits: • LEGAL ASSISTANCE. This service offers the company’s customers advice on Spanish legislation in matters of housing, consumption, family and labour law or driving.

• TRAVEL ASSISTANCE. If the Línea Directa customer is a victim of theft outside Spain, the company will provide accommodation in a hotel of up to four stars.

• HOME REPAIRS. In addition to repairing windscreens at the customer’s home, Línea Directa also offers to collect and deliver the car to one of its network repairers, and acts as an intermediary in any matter relating to the repair process.

• FINE MANAGEMENT. This service offers the customers advice on traffic fines in their own language, as well as notifying them on the official state bulletins, a benefit specially designed for expatriates.

And now home insurance too Línea Directa offers an exclusive Premium policy designed for foreign residents in Spain, which apart from offering the best cover on the market, also offers customer service in English.

For more information: 902 123 104

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Friday, March 30, 2012

When hearts bleed

HOW many times do we have to get our heart broken before we say ‘enough’?

How many chances do we give it before we finally realise that maybe this is the way things are meant to be, that there is no one true love for us. Or at least, if there is, that we´re never going to find them?

I ask this because it seems the human race as a whole is eternally optimistic about finding a mate, a partner, a spouse. At age 18, we assume that we will one day meet someone; during our 20s we have fun, play the field, enjoy ourselves, maybe have one or two semi serious relationships, maybe even settle down. Then it all goes wrong and we are on our own, but it´s OK because we´re only in our thirties, the prime of our life.

When I hit 30, it was suddenly a fashionable age. Programmes like Friends made it the time of your life - 30 is the new 20, everyone said. So we carry on, ever searching, but still there´s no panic.

We just assume that one day the right person will arrive on our doorstep, in our local bar or will appear in our e-mail inbox. It seems we have the world at our

feet and the possibility of Happy Ever After is always present.

Then we get to 40…. and find ourselves alone. With a history of broken relationships and broken hearts, the possibility of never being able to settle down and have dinner for two becomes real.

So, what do we do? Do we resign ourselves to the fact that if you have never met anyone who is willing to marry you and who you want to marry, it´s too late?

Do you stay optimistic that Mr or Miss Right is still out there and will be found? Or do you collect your dignity and your heart and decide that you are no longer in the game - that you cannot take any more disappointment and carry on with your life as a single person.

I guess that depends on the person. I had one friend who had no interest whatsoever in meeting a man; she had family here and was content. Yet other friends are constantly looking, searching the internet or waiting to meet the right man, wherever they may see him. I, for one, am in the second group. While I am with a man I am happier. That may not be a correct thing to say in this day and age of women´s freedom but it´s my truth.

I love going out with my son, but I also like going out with a partner. I like the intimacy, of course, but also just knowing I am in a relationship makes me more relaxed and I feel I can concentrate on

things that are really important in life, rather than wondering if the guy I´ve just bumped with my shopping trolley may be the one!

Don´t get me wrong. When I´m without a boyfriend I don´t turn into a desperate Jenny, I just can´t help looking. I am well aware, however, that being in a relationship is just one part of life and can lead to a lot more problems than it solves - and I enjoy my time between partners by filling my life with friends and hobbies.

Those who appear to have closed their hearts may say that if you don´t let anyone into your heart, then no one can break it, but that is not a rule I can live to.

As the saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. It´s just that at the time it´s not always easy to see it.

So I will carry on with my relationship in the hope that this is the one. I will not let the thought enter my head that I may end up at 50 in the same boat I found myself in at 32 and 40. And I will not be put off love just because of a few setbacks.

I know in my heart that my next longterm relationship will last for the rest of my days. At least I am pretty sure it will.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Dining with the PM? Just cheque in here I’VE sadly never had a spare quarter of a million pounds to give me Premier League style access to a cosy dinner with David and Samantha Cameron at Downing Street.

I’m just surprised that anybody was surprised at the results of the wonderful sting operation that caught the now ex-Tory Party treasurer, Peter Cruddas, blurting out a tariff for the kind of access and influence you’d get if you pulled your cheque book out.

It’s been going on in Labour and Tory circles for years, and is just one of the reasons why so many people have become disillusioned by politics. It’s the old routine that if you have money, you could buy policy and power. Do you remember Tony Blair having to return one million quid given to the Labour Party in 1997 by Formula One boss Bernie Ecclestone? Not that he was buying concessions for cigarette sponsorship. Of course not!

Labour’s leader, Ed Miliband, has rightly called for an independent inquiry into the whole business, rather than an internal Tory fix, and I think he’s right. But it should go further, looking at the behaviour of all political parties, with every skeleton coming out of the cupboards. That might be a hornets’ nest he might not be comfortable with, but if nothing else, this whole sordid business might give an added incentive for all British political parties to be funded via the taxpayer, rather than rich businessmen and trade union barons.

It’s not what Cameron wanted on the back of the sneaky “Granny Tax” which was not immediately apparent during last week’s Budget speech. But at least it brought a great comment from a new Twitter user that made me laugh. It said: “Of course there must be a full independent inquiry on both sides. Trust must be established”.

Thank you very much, Mr. Rupert Murdoch, the great standard-bearer for democracy!

BROTHER BOTHER I WATCHED with great interest David Miliband’s BBC interview with Andrew Marr at the weekend. It was yet another extremely polished, professional and honest performance by one of the few British politicians who really know how to connect with an audience. It was also yet another reminder of how detached

his younger brother Ed is in his position as Labour leader whenever he pops up in front of the TV cameras. I’ve no doubt at all that David is just biding his time to get his hands on that Labour crown that should have been his as of right 18 months ago.

OBAMA’S MITT AND HISS THERE’S no doubt President Obama is one of the best political orators around. Words can make a great impact, and that was certainly the case last week in what he had to say about the disgraceful killing of Florida teenager Trayvon Martin. To say, “If I had a son, he’d look like Trayvon” was quite something. What a shame, though, that it took the American President four weeks and some angry protests in the Orlando area for him to come to the podium over the matter.

Meanwhile, with the Presidential election coming in November, it looks highly likely that Obama will be up against the Republican moderate, Mitt Romney. Despite some progress by the nutty right-wing Rick Santorum in some of the Southern primaries, the Republican hierarchy seem to have seen sense in realising that the sensible Romney offers their best chance of taking back the White House. It never surprises me that political common sense eventually appears when the polling machines and ballot boxes are about to be dusted down!

RED LEN’S BLOOD LUST IT’S Red Len McCluskey warning time again!

This time he’s looking to get his UNITE petrol tanker driver members striking over health and safety matters. To be fair, in a secret ballot on a high turnout, they voted overwhelmingly to down tools (or should I say steering wheels) at the UK’s petrol distribution depots.

Back in 2000, the tanker drivers almost brought the country and Tony Blair to his knees. No such problems this time round, as army drivers are already being trained to keep the supplies going.

Meanwhile, in typical Red Len style, McCluskey has refused to rule out strike action over the Easter holiday, with the prospect of millions of unhappy motorists having their vacations disrupted. Does this relic just thrive on strikes like a vampire does on blood?

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Friday, March 30, 2012

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

THE SPANISH ARE MURDER! IS it just me, or are th majority of Spanish waiters and shop assistants rude, ignorant and unhelpful towards Brits?

What chance is there of even getting a smile from your camarero, rather than the customary grunt, when he delivers your meal to the table?

And when it comes to getting the attention of the girl at the till in the supermarket, I reckon that if I were deaf and dumb she’d happily let me stand there and rot away to a stinking stench.

I’ve been around the world, visited

many places and experienced many different cultures.

I used to beleive that Chinese people did not like the British because of their seeming rudeness and lack of common decency. But that was back in England!

Then I travelled to the Far East and was made to realise that that is just the way they are with their own people.

Actually, I have to say that for the most part here in Spain the Chinese people really do have the art of charming the customers.

However, moving back to the Spanish, I’m not so sure they will ever master that particular skill.

Maybe it was our fault for sinking the Armada. But come on guys, that was a long time ago and many ships have sailed since 1588!

For many years I have been wondering ‘if it’s just me...or are we as a nation too nice?

What do other Courier readers think?

MIKE THORNTON, El Raso, Guardamar

Falling sick in the UK can be a real pain LAST December, while I was in the UK, I experienced some very severe stomach pains.

North Staffs Royal Infirmary...’just take painkillers’

Donna, you look a picture of...surgery!

I AM amazed at Donna Gee’s new photo at the top of her column - she'll have to change the strap line from "Grumpy Old Gran" to "Glamorous Granny!"

Donna, I think we are roughly of an age (I will be 66 in May) and I am looking a bit worse for wear. When I saw Anne Robinson after her facelift I was seriously considering one but am worried about the result.

Did you have a full facelift or just cosmetic treatment as I am tempted to treat myself for my birthday if I can look as good as you do. I love your column and I don't expect you to advertise your treatment, so if you can reply to this email I would be grateful.

I had a few days back in Manchester last week and while it was pouring down here on Tuesday last week, I was sitting basking in the sun!

DOROTHY SMITH, Los Altos DONNA replies: Dorothy, I really don’t know whether to take your comments as a compliment or an insult! Is it that obvious that I’ve had a little, shall we say, rejuvenation? I changed the photo because friends told me I look better on the new one (and I’m vain enough to believe it). Let’s just say I look better on photos than in the flesh. I’m a lot quieter too! As for the cosmetic side, just keep reading my column...

q

They were so bad that my family took me to the A & E at the North Staffordshire Royal Infirmary.

I arrived there at 8.30, checked in straight away and was told to sit in the waiting room. It was packed as the hospital in Stafford closes from 10pm to 8.30am!

Five hours later I was called to see the doctor who had my urine tested and returned to tell me that he had good news - my sample was clear.

When I asked what the problem was likely to be, he said most likely Inflammation of the bowel. When I asked what he could do for that, he told me to “just go home and take painkillers’’.

Several days later, on my return to La Zenia, I was still in great pain and went to the Torrevieja A & E. Within 20 minutes I had had almost every test possible and was treated there for renal colitis.

It took nearly three weeks to clear up.

Torrevieja Hospital...20minute wait and almost every test possible

I also made an appointment to see my daughter's doctor in Uttoxeter, who charged me 70€ for the privilege even though I had an English passport and my EHIC card, which had been supplied by Newcastle.

I just hope I never get ill again while in the UK. JEAN ( La Zenia)

Another green light to cross over...

WELL, it has happened to CLARO again! I must admit I did have to stifle a grin this morning when I saw a front page story that yet another CLARO leader crosses over to the PP. It is history repeating itself. What do the PP do - open the right door or perhaps offer the right amount?

With all due respect, I cannot understand a chap of that age putting himself under so much pressure!

I do feel sorry for CLARO airlines". There have been no incidents of but there again it is a free this type and I would be interested to know world. I wonder if they will the source of this "misinformation" and still be around come the which "officials" at the airport you are refernext election? ring to in your article.

At least the party we Publication of such unsubstantiated voted for is not so "green" information can only be described as irrebehind the ears and can sponsible journalism. make their mind up which CAITRÍONA BEGGAN way they are going. We Business Development Manager will stick with them!

Región de Murcia International Airport BILL OWENS

Check your ‘rumours’ in future I WOULD appreciate if from now on you could contact me to corroborate rumours before you publish them in your newspaper and on your website, misinforming the expatriate community.

I refer specifically to the paragraph in the article ‘No Fly Zone’ (March 16): "But as the airport continues to wait for permits and licences, there are rumours of other problems – including cracks in the building due to land movement and disagreements with

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Friday, March 30, 2012

editor@thecourier.es

MORE OF YOUR EMAILS IN THE COSTA’S BEST READ

KING OF THE COSTA IT IS hard to believe that the CLARO councillor Bob Houliston has been instrumental in bringing back the corrupt regime of Monica Lorente and her bully-boy colleagues to rule once again over the municipality of Orihuela and the coast.

After what CLARO has stated and in their election manifesto about this corrupt regime that had ignored the coast and starved it of investment for the past 25 years, is outrageous.

It is also an act of gross treachery to the people who voted for them at the last election to remove the corrupt PP from office, which includes myself.

Bob Houliston justifies this act of treachery by saying he was not allowed by the coalition government to have everything his own way and wanted the Playa Flamenca town hall as his own personal domain with no other councillors interfering, thus giving him total control.

Everyone should remember that part of his election mani-

in the past in their newsletters

That’s Bob’s REAL aim festo actually called for extra councillors working out of Playa Flamenca. This is the real reason behind his antipathy and hostility towards Pedro Mancebo, the hard-working councillor for tourism.

However, it doesn’t justify Bob's nine months of indolence.

Bob Houliston hides behind the word ‘alleged’ now, when referring to the corruption charges levelled against his new friend Monica and her fellow councillors, to justify his actions of imposing them upon us once again.

No doubt he will support her when she imposes another restriction on voting registration at the next election in Orihuela Costa, like she did before the May 2011 election.

The same when she orders another new limousine and chauffeur for herself like she did before, and offers highlypaid jobs to her supporters, all paid for from the public purse, again as before.

Mr. Houliston is doing exactly what his predecessor Stefan Prokakof did when he went over to the PP in return for money and power; this now

seems a familiar trait within the CLARO leadership.

Who amongst us would ever trust them again?

Your newspaper’s previous letter a week ago by Alan McPhail was spot on; Bob Houliston really has no honour whatsoever in his lust for power.

He will turn his back on anyone, including the electorate and his own party members, to satisfy his own personal ambition to be King of Orihuela Costa.

STEVE LEONARD, Orihuela Costa

CARVE-UP A BIG RISK MR. LEONARD (see letter left) seems to have got carried away. All that CLARO has agreed to do is to vote for a Popular Party motion in the Pleno this week which opposes the present government's decision to carve up the job of councillor for the coast between the three parties in the tripartite minority government. We think this is a recipe for disaster and confusion since the government parties are so divided that they cannot agree to nominate one person to succeed me.

The carve-up also puts at risk the continuation or the effective management of a budget for the coast.

As for the future, I can assure Mr. Leonard that CLARO will always make collective, carefully considered decisions as to what is in the interests of Orihuela Costa. We will not get carried away like Mr. Leonard.

My experience of nine months in the government - before I resigned having had enough - of being prevented doing my job by the negative and ambitious policies of Pedro Mancebo, has demonstrated what is NOT in the interest of the coast.

BOB HOULISTON

Bad Bob’s bogey boobs

PARKED constantly on a disabled ramp l and pedestrian crossing outside the Playa Flamenca town hall. On police instructions, he

he did not offer any solutions to the problems of the coast. He knew the problems, but did nothing about them. l As an elected councillor who claims to love the coast, where was he on Tuesday March 20, when the coast almost collapsed under the floods? Nowhere to be seen. He wouldn't even get himself wet!!!!!

claims. l Uses an illegal no parking sign on his house. l Did nothing in the town hall except force people to make appointments in writing.

l Meets openly with PP's Monica Lorente, whom in the past he never had a good word for due her blatant neglect of Orihuela Costa.

l Employs a helper who drives an uninsured English registered motorbike and then parks it on the footpath outside the Playa Flamenca town hall.

l Resigns his position as councillor for the coast because he wasn't competent enough to do the job properly. However he blamed his resignation on the fact that he wouldn't work with the other councillors in government. He now boasts he will be back soon as councillor for the coast, with the PP as his new masters.

lWatches on as someone very close to him receives a 70,000€ car as a gift from a company that does business with the town hall. l When his friends ran a private drinking party attended by thousands of young teenagers in Campoamor in August 2011 he paid 500€ for a DJ when the going rate was 180€. l Joins an alliance with CLR purely to avoid compliance to an electoral 5% rule. l Betrays his alliance leader by breaking ranks within weeks of being elected. l Betrays the electorate by voting in favour of higher salaries for councillors and advisors, despite his election manifesto declaring that he would reduce them. l In an effort to gain votes in the next election he protests loudly when other councillors come to the coast to work for the people of Orihuela Costa again. This despite his own election manifesto promising more councillors working on the coast. l Works less than 20 hours a week for his 45,000€ salary. l Appears for every photo opportunity but not the planning meetings or the work in progress. l Causes the Orihuela Costa engineer to request a move to Orihuela because she could not work with Bob or his inept

Bob Houliston and Pedro Mancebo in happier days

l After resigning his position he retains his councillor seat under instruction from the PP. The honourable thing would be to let someone willing to work with the elected government use the seat but Monica needs the seat to bring her gang back to power. l Criticises the mayor for appointing three councillors to work on the coast after he resigned, maintaining that only he should have total control of the coast.

sidekick and then publicly blames Pedro Mancebo, which is a complete lie.

l Openly declares his support for the PP and promises to support them if they support him in his aspirations for his l Tells the residents of Orihuela Costa that the budget for position he covets so much. the coast is only €2 million when in actual fact it is almost €12 l Promises to vote against the government's vital promillion plus wages. posed loan repayment scheme, which will cause chaos on l Blames, moans, whinges and criticises his alliance the coast and cripple the government that he so willingly leader at every opportunity to cover his own ineptness. joined without the approval and backing of his political group JOHN CARROLL, 03189 Orihuela Costa l Does not make any positive proposals other than having the posters temporarily removed from bridges only after In keeping with this newspaper’s policy, Bob many complaints over many months from the public.

Houliston has been offered the opportunity to reply - EDITOR l During his eight(?) months as councillor for the coast, to this letter in next week’s Courier

q

THE OPINIONS EXPRESSED ON THESE PAGES ARE NOT NECESSARILY THOSE OF THE COURIER

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Friday, March 30, 2012

INGREDIENTS

Spiced chocolate and orange hot cross buns

475g strong white flour, plus extra for dusting 25g good-quality cocoa powder 1 tsp ground mixed spice 1 tsp salt 85g chilled unsalted butter, chopped 100g golden caster sugar, plus 50g extra to glaze 2 x 7g sachets dried yeast 1 large free-range egg 190ml lukewarm milk 1 tbsp vegetable oil, plus extra for greasing 75g raisins (optional) 75g milk chocolate, chopped Finely grated zest and juice of 1 orange 75g chopped candied peel

METHOD

1. Sift 400g of the flour, the cocoa powder, mixed spice and salt into a bowl. Add the butter and, with your fingertips, rub together until the mix resembles fine breadcrumbs. Stir

through the sugar and dried yeast, then form a well in the centre. Whisk the egg and milk together and pour into the well. Quickly mix with a wooden spoon to incorporate.

2. Knead on a lightly floured surface for 10 minutes until soft and silky. Shape into a ball. Put in a large, lightly oiled bowl, covered with cling film. Leave for 1½ hours in a warm place, loosely covered with greased cling film, until doubled in size.

3. Remove the risen dough to a lightly floured surface, flatten slightly, then knead in the raisins (optional), chocolate, zest and candied peel, until everything is evenly distributed.

4. Divide into 12 equal pieces (about 100g each) and

shape into smooth-surfaced buns. Place in rows on a lightly oiled baking tray, leaving a little gap between each. Cover loosely with lightly oiled cling film and leave to prove in a warm place for 1 hour or until doubled in size again. The buns should now be touching each other. Preheat the oven to 200°C/fan180°C/gas 6.

5. With a serrated knife, score the tops of the buns with a cross. Mix the remaining 75g flour with 1 tbsp oil and 5 tbsp cold water to a smooth paste, then spoon into a piping bag (or a small, clear, sturdy plastic bag with the corner snipped off).

6. Carefully pipe the mixture in lines along the knife scores on the buns, going first one way, then the other, using a knife to stop the flow.

7. Bake in the oven for 20 minutes until risen and firm to the touch.

8. Meanwhile, put the remaining sugar into a pan with the orange juice. Put over a low heat until it has dissolved. Bring to the boil and bubble for 2 minutes until thickened.

9. Remove the buns from the oven and turn out onto a rack. Glaze with the syrup and serve warm or cold.

Friday, March 30, 2012

DIAMANTE’S TALENT SEARCH 2012 In 2004 Diamante’s launched the first Search for a Star on The Costa Blanca. What a success it was. From all the contestants that came through the ranks to The Final at least 5 are working professionally, singing in restaurants and bars on the Costa Blanca earning a living doing what they love best, entertaining. What an amazing time it was.

There were of course many other bars who tried to capture what Diamantes created but never quite managed to achieve the same success. In the last few years there have been many competitions on the TV from Pop Idol, Search for a Star, X Factor, Britain’s got Talent to the new one on the BBC which has just called The Voice which is very good.

Well we are proud to say that we are about to launch a new competition called TALENT SEARCH 20 12 Starting on the 11th April 2012. We are looking for the stars of the future.

We want you to come and entertain us, every week there will be 2 weekly winners who will go through to the final and at the end of 10 weeks we will have 20 people going into the semi-finals

and then the GRAND FINALE. The WINNER will receive a day in a recording studio making their own CD which will be played on Local Radio. A PA system so the winner can set up their own Business entertaining with their own equipment, TV coverage plus there are many more prizes on offer for the last 5 finalists.

Diamante is a fabulous venue to perform in with its own stage and sound effects, so if you think that you have THE VOICE call to register and enter our competition. Every week there will be one of our local entertaining stars comparing and singing plus we have a few guest surprises judging.

If you just want to come and be entertained with your friends and family just call to book a table. This is going to be an all Singing all Dancing Gala Spectacular of the year. We want you to be part of it.

RAISING MONEY FOR MABS CANCER SUPPORT GROUP, last year Diamantes raised €1,14900 for the charity, this year we hope to raise more.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

FOXYS MONDAY NIGHT PROJECT Bringing you a fun filled 3 hours including: * GUESS THE YEAR, 1 hour of hit´s and gossip.....can you be the 1st to guess it. * THE MOTOWN SESSION, a must for all motown lovers with the best in Soul, Motown and a splash of northern soul. * THE BALLAD HOUR, Wind down with your favourites.

STARTS THIS MONDAY FROM 8PM ON TKO FM & TKO GOLD Monday Nights will never be the same.

On Monday 26th March Dave Knights was joined in the TKO Gold studio by special guests Laura Boyle who is a serving medium at the Spiritual Association of Great Britain & Laura is also a consultant to the British Astrological & Psychic Society.

Laura was giving listeners a chance to ring or email questions in and have mini spiritual readings.

Join Peter Hurst starting Thursday on TKO FM & TKO Gold, for all your rock favourites from the 60’s, 70’s & 80’s with music from The Kinks, The Who, Rolling Stones, Alice Cooper, ELO, U2, Joe Cocker, Bryan Adams, The Faces & Many More.

Let’s see if you can win yourself a meal for two and a bottle of wine at Quesada Fish & Chips POP QUIZ March 30th Welcome to the famous TKO Gold pop quiz!

All you have to do is take the first letter from each answer to find the name of a band or artist. Once you have found the key word, listen in to Chris Ashley´s show on TKO Gold, Saturday mornings 9am – 12pm.

1. Ben E King was among others the lead singer with this soul group.

2. Along the same lines Bruce Dickinson is lead vocalist with this heavy metal mob.

3. Who had a number one UK hit in 1960 with "Why".

4. In 1956 Lonnie Donegan signed for one of the Pye record labels..which one.

5. Back to question 3...which Frankie had the US number one.

6. First Top 10 hit for Tommy Steele.

7. They were Native New Yorkers in 1977.

8. Who do we know singer Helen Adu better as.

9. In which month did Earth,Wind & Fire groove to in 1979.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Water — Nature’s Own Fat Burner No matter which eating plan you follow, or which hot new diet Hollywood celebs are raving about, one ingredient remains consistent and that is to consume loads and loads of water.

Water has been dubbed as nature’s own fat burner and drinking enough water on a daily basis will help you not only shed those kilos, but think better, perform better and also improve your skin condition and general health.

Drinking water helps to flush toxins out of your system and can also help you get rid of that extra weight you may be carrying. Why? Because drinking water has a positive impact on your metabolism and promotes the burning of energy or heat — known as thermogenesis.

When your metabolism is in check, your healthy eating is given a faster boost, which means your weight loss results will come quicker to you. Failing drink adequate amounts of water, irrespective of your eating plan will result in poor hydration and slow down your metabolism. So basically, at the end of the day you are more susceptible to gaining extra weight because of your slow metabolism.

Then there are other factors to consider about drinking water to reach your weight loss goals. First of all, when your body is deprived of water it often sends signals to your brain, telling it to eat. That’s right — thirst is very often misunderstood by the brain as hunger. So the next time you’re feeling overly peckish, try gulping down a few sips of water and see how you feel.

Secondly, water helps to fill you up. Having a glass of plain water to accompany your meal, instead of that fizzy diet drink will allow you to eat less and still feel fuller.

There are formulas available to help you determine exactly, to the tee, how much water your body requires for your specific weight and level of exercise intensity. But, ideally you should aim at drinking six to eight glasses of water a day.

The best way to do this is to drink a glass or two with every meal. Once you get the hang of it, you will realize that you just can’t live without it — not just for weight loss reasons, but for the hundred other beneficial effects water has on your body and health.

The Atkins diet became one of the most popular diet plans around the world, spread in the form of books, DVDs, magazines and more. However, besides losing weight, many of the diet's followers noticed that Atkins and bad breath were quite common.

An important fact to know about this problem is that it's extremely hard to get rid of the foul odor while staying on the Atkins diet.

This isn't your usual bad breath. If you're following a

high protein, low-carb diet, like the Atkins diet, bad breath can be caused by a process called ketosis. This happens when the body no longer has a supply of carbohydrates, so has to break down fat to provide fuel.

Dentists say that extra brushing, flossing and tongue-scraping won't help because in this case bad breath isn't an oral hygiene issue. As the smell comes

Bad Breath Diets

from your digestive system, rather than anything that's going on in your mouth, there is little you can do to prevent it except change your diet. Eat a healthy mix of foods without excluding any one group.

If you insist in trying this diet, chew on parsley as this can help mask bad breath.

Also drink more water — at least 8 glasses of water per day.

21

TESTING YOUR MEDICATIONS FOR BODY TOLERANCE Few people realize that prescription drugs have become a leading cause of death, disease, and disability. They trust that the medicines they take will help them overcome illness, enhance their health and promote well-being. A report from the FDA states that in the United States, over 100,000 hospital-based deaths are caused by prescribed medications. In the UK, experts have pointed to a single drug type Diclofenac – a commonly prescribed painkiller, as the cause of around 2000 premature heart attacks and strokes every year. Drugs can have such adverse effects on the body especially for older people because as we age we become more sensitive to them due to the bodily transitions that occur from middle age to old age. These changes alter the way drugs are absorbed and utilized by the body, making it more likely to experience side effects, drug interactions and other adverse drug reactions. Women, older people, and people with disabilities are least used in clinical trials and are most affected. A study by Indiana University found that on average every drug lists about 70 potential drug reactions. Using a computer program, the researchers discovered that the more commonly prescribed drugs averaged around 100 side effects each. The greatest number of side effects was found in antidepressants, antiviral medications and some newer drugs.

If one considers that disrupting even one cell function will ultimately have a negative effect on the entire body, then it becomes easy to imagine how a single prescription drug can disrupt multiple cell functions causing thousands of biochemical changes in the body! Even worse, introducing a second drug can cause tens of thousands more changes, and a third can produce hundreds of thousands. Since most people over the age of 60 are taking at least 4 medications, one can only imagine the extent of biochemical assault on the body. The sad truth is that most people on numerous medications very often start taking a second medication to suppress the problems caused by the first, and then a third drug to suppress the symptoms caused by the first two, and so on.

Commonly prescribed drugs all too often are associated with the most adverse effects. PPIs (proton pump inhibitors), which work by cutting the amount of stomach acid produced are used for treating stomach ulcers and heartburn and have rapidly become one of the most frequently prescribed groups of drugs. PPIs are known to dramatically raise the risk of contracting a deadly bug ‘Clostridium Difficile’, leading to the deaths of hundreds of people taking the medication every year in the United Kingdom. Another group of drugs doled out too readily are those for arthritis. The non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs) are some of the most commonly prescribed painkillers in general practice; however recent studies have linked them to a higher risk of ulcers, heart disease and stroke. The adverse effects of a particular medication differ among individuals and for the same person depends on the time of day it is taken.

Advanced technology now makes it possible to test any prescribed medication to see how it reacts to the organs of the body. By analysing the drug with a spectrographic camera and comparing it to the scanned body, the dangerous side effects and adverse drug reactions from prescribed drugs can be avoided.

MEDB Clinic using Sensitiv Imago technology now offers this service to the residents of Costa Blanca.

For more information, log on to www.medb.es.

For questions and queries regarding diagnosis and therapy, contact Dr Machi Mannu at machimannu@gmail.com

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Friday, March 30, 2012

23

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain four years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then.

Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Ivan wanted to know how to play DVD’s bought ADVICE: Ayliff wanted to know how to get sound working from online applications like BBC Radio in the US here.

Q

Hi there, I hope you can help. My friend has some DVDs that have been made for the American market. Is there any way we can get these converted over to play on his DVD player? Thanks Ivan

Hola Richard, I have one problem and that is sound. I can play my iTunes stuff, so speakers are connected o.k. but am unable to access BBC Radio, by that I mean I connect and press listen and there is no sound.

Any ideas on the subject? Please let me know your thoughts. Regards Ayliff

Q A

Hi Ayliff, most of these services use Adobe Flash Player, you can download it free from www.adobe.com, once you have downloaded it try the service again and see if it’s any better.

ADVICE: Roger wanted to know how to use space on one drive to increase space on another.

Q

A

Hi Ivan, all commercially produced DVD’s are region coded to enable playback only in the relevant licenced region, in Europe we have the region code of 2 and the US has the region code of 1. Only DVD’s that match the region code of your DVD player can be played in that device and, of course, all of the DVD players sold in Europe will be encoded to region 2 and not 1 – meaning that you and your friend will probably not be able to play the DVD’s. Computers and some DVD players will allow you to change the region of the player 5 times before its fixed to the last region, you could do this to play your DVD’s once if you just wanted to watch them, or perhaps you might want to invest in a region free DVD player that will allow you to play any DVD from any region – these are easily found via the Internet.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

I own the above laptop which has a Hard Disk split into 2 drives, Windows (C) 74.5 GB and Data (D) 74.1 GB. Is it possible to eliminate Data (D) so that I have just Windows?

I have an External Hard Drive for backup.

Roger

A

A: Hi Roger, firstly you should be very aware that making changes to any of your disk partitions can have disastrous effects to your computer and you should ensure that you have a full and tested (and double tested) backup of your data before you start to do any work on these drives.

This is not the sort of thing that most people get involved with and if you are at all unsure then its best to get a professional in to do it for you.

But…seeing as you asked, there is a way that you can “merge” these partitions together in Windows 7, but rather than using the term “merge” what I am going to explain is how you can delete one partition and extend the other. What you should do is…

1.

Firstly, after you have backed everything up is to use Windows Disk Management (Right-click Computer > Manage > Storage > Disk Management) to delete your “D” Drive this will change the partition type to “unallocated”.

2.

Now you should be able to right click the “C” drive and choose “Extend Volume” to make the “C” drive larger. …that should enable you to do what you want.

Other readers should be aware that with earlier versions of Windows like Windows XP this was not possible without specialist software.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

THE SPANISH PRESS

IBERIA PINS HOPES ON BUDGET WING El Pais

El País

LAST Friday Iberia unveiled its new controversial low-cost airline, Iberia Express, which will begin operations on Sunday with four flights offered at discount rates.

The chief executive officer of the new airline, Luis Gallego, said the first flight will be from Madrid to Alicante, with other flights on Sunday from the Spanish capital to Málaga, Seville and Palma de Mallorca.

Pilots’ union SEPLA has held a series of oneday stoppages since December to protest the creation of Iberia Express, which it claims breaches the collective agreement it has with the company. Iberia estimates it lost three million euros a day as a result of the stoppages. The Public Works Ministry has appointed a mediator.

Iberia said the creation of the budget carrier was necessary to stem losses on its short to medium-haul flights. Iberia stated an operating loss last year of 61 million euros. “From the first moment we were clear that in order to compete in the complex European panorama, we needed to have costs that were the average in Europe, in an environment in which the majority of companies are in the red, while others are going bust,” Gallego said.

Iberia Express will start off with four planes and four routes. It will add a further five routes in Spain in May and start to fly in the summer to overseas destinations such as Dublin, Riga, Mykonos and Naples. It will have a fleet of 13 planes by the end of the year and 40 in 2015. The company will have a workforce of 500, including 125 pilots, 325 cabin crew and 50 ground staff.

Accompanying Gallego at the presentation, Iberia chief executive Rafael Sánchez-Lozano said Iberia Express expects to “make money from the first day”. Iberia estimates its creation will generate cost savings for Iberia of 100 million euros by 2015. The company will have initial capital of 20 million euros.

Rajoy responded. to Obama is reported the are aw s wa he d olo- have sai Obama jokingly ap ies’ teams were to two countr e abl ng bei together, well gised for not g rkin his wo joy to Ra g itin speak Spanish, saying to before inv him soon in the daughters were going see to e com ldren teach him. “My chi use. too,” White Ho do I and h, glis En dy stu

El País

ÓSCAR Sánchez, a carwash employee from the Catalan town of Montgat, arrived at Barcelona’s El Prat airport last Thursday afternoon to a jubilant reception from friends and family. The previous evening, Sánchez had been released from jail in Italy, where he had served almost two years for a drug-trafficking offence he did not commit.

“Thank you, thank you,” Sánchez repeated as he gave the thumbs up sign to dozens of television cameras.

Sánchez, who spent 626 days in prison in Rome and Naples, said he wanted to go home, have a shower, watch a basketball match and drink a beer.

“In Rome I was treated with respect, but in Naples it was a different matter,” Sánchez said. “They beat me with a stick, burned me with cigarettes, kicked me La Opinion in the chest, shoved my head in a wardrobe and is battery farmed, in a tiny even etched an ‘N’ for space, one hen on top of Napoli into my arm.” another.

Despite his experience, In Spain a third of hens Sánchez said he held no illlive in these conditions; feelings toward Italy. “One that’s 11 million hens. thing is Italy and another is If the first number is a two the hen lives in a ware- what happened to me.”

Sánchez was arrested as house, but can roam free.

The number one means a suspected narcotics trafthe layer lives on a farm, in ficker after a mafia member, the open air, with space and Marcelo Roberto Marín, is fed food designed for used his documents to carry out various transacchickens.

A zero means the hen tions. Sánchez’s defence, lives on a farm and eats nat- as well as the Spanish ural food, with no chemicals police, always maintained or additives. These eggs are he had been the victim of identity theft. known as ecological.

Sánchez was sentenced The box may say otherwise, but the code is the to 14 years before being information you should trust. acquitted when the judge The other numbers will tell ordered further investigation of the evidence. you the place of origin.

Eggs-ellent help to avoid battery farms

y jo a R r fo e it v in e s u o H e it Wh rack MARIANO Rajoy and Ba h eac w kno now a am Ob d of other personally. The hea nt and the Spanish governme have the President of the US at ons asi occ two spoken on mmit the Nuclear Security Su this week in Seoul.

Identity theft victim walks free from Italian jail

NEW EU regulations about eggs are causing huge confusion for consumers.

Under the regulations, battery farming can still be practiced but the cages will have to be slightly bigger at 750 instead of 550 square cm. And hens must now be supplied with a drinking fountain and a nest.

The installation of these meagre facilities will slightly increase the price of eggs, something consumers and producers are already complaining about.

Consumers wishing to know the condition the layers of their eggs live should read the codes on the eggs.

On each egg there are 11 numbers, and the first is the code for the conditions. A number three is the most common and means the hen

Friday, March 30, 2012

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26

Friday, March 30, 2012

WHAT THE UK

STRIKE THREAT FUELS PANIC AT THE PUMPS UK MOTORISTS began to panicbuy fuel on Tuesday as Government officials warned them to prepare for a rolling national strike by militant tanker drivers.

Daily Mail

ensure they have a full tank.

When asked if the Government would advise drivers to fill up, Downing Street’s The looming industrial action – expected official spokesman said: “People will draw to start to coincide with the Easter holidays – their own conclusions.”

The AA warned against “turning a rumour was top of the agenda at a meeting of the National Security Council chaired by David into a crisis”.Their president, Edmund King, said: “There is plenty of fuel to go round and Cameron.

Sources urged drivers not to hoard petrol, the situation will only deteriorate if motorists but said they should take ‘prudent’ steps to rush unnecessarily to filling stations.

“If 30 million people suddenly want to fill up 50-litre Daily Mirror fuel tanks then you could Soldiers at the ready: Army personnel have a shortage. are being trained to drive the tankers “It’s totally inappropriate for people to panic-buy. No strikes have yet been efforts to get a settlement,” a April 8 or 9, causing massive disruption over the Easter announced and there is spokesman said. weekend. Drivers are expectLabour leader Ed Miliband enough fuel out there as long A PROUD Englishman has paid the ultimate price for ed to strike for four days at a has so far refused to conlosing a bet with a Welshman — by having a Wales tat- as people do not fill up time, then work for two days, demn the strike threat, with unnecessarily.” too on his back. then strike again. the Unite union behind the A spokeswoman for Esso John Adam, 22, made a wager with his rugby-loving Ministers at the NSC meetballot being the party’s pal James Griffiths that England would win the Six said: “We would ask ing discussed contingency Nations championship. Welshman James, 21, pledged motorists to stick to their nor- largest paymaster. plans – including bringing in Petrol stations up and he would get an English Rose tattoo if England won — mal buying patterns.” foreign hauliers and training as long as John did the same with a Wales inking.

Labour accused Downing down the country saw unusu- up members of the Armed And when Wales Street of stoking the risk of a ally big queues of motorists Forces to stand in. swept to Grand mass rush to the pumps. filling up their cars or buying Motorists started panicSlam glory, it was “It’s the height of irrespon- petrol cans. buying on Tuesday with unlucky John who sibility for Downing Street to A walkout of drivers could pumps running dry in had to bite the bul- give the impression that peo- take place as early as April 3, Preston. In Whitstable, Kent, let. On Tuesday he ple should be panic-buying. but ministers believe it is motorists were seen filling had the six-inch They should be using all their more likely to begin around petrol cans.

Prince of Wales’ feathers inked on to his back. “It would be a great tattoo for a Welshman,” he said.

John, a University of Glamorgan student, was work- ROYAL Mail is raising the price of stamps by The Sun ing at the Millennium Stadium bar when he realised an inflation-busting 39 per cent. he’d lost the bet. He said: “I heard the huge roar at the Both first and second class stamps will go Mail meant that something had to give to end of the game and knew that I’d have to go through up 14p from April 30 to 60p and 50p. maintain the universal service obligation. with it. I curled up with my head in my hands and That’s a 30 per cent rise for first class and “Our research suggests that for some cusasked myself what on earth was I thinking.”

39 per cent hike for second. tomers there is a fine line between being willVictorious James paid for his mate’s £35 tattoo.

Inflation was 3.4 per cent last month ing to pay more and deciding to walk away Parlour boss Dan Harris, 31, said: “In 20 years his according to the Consumer Prices index. from using the postal service.” kids will probably ask him why he’s got that tattoo Robert Hammond, of Consumer Focus, Royal Mail defended the move saying it when he’s English. And he's going to have to tell said: “This is not great news for consumers. was being squeezed by competition and them it’s because Wales have a better rugby team.”

“Unfortunately, the economics of Royal electronic communications.

Lost bet costs England fan a rugby Tafftoo!

Email stamps rise on letter post

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain freaking AN American pilot was wrestled to the floor by passengers on Tuesday after running around a packed jet shouting: "We're all going down — say your prayers."

Captain Clayton Osborn (pictured) bellowed about "bombs" and "al-Qaeda" before being restrained.

The 135-passenger Airbus A320 was forced into an emergency landing.

Captain Osborn had been locked out of thecockpit by a co-pilot concerned about his erratic behaviour when he left to use the loo.

After his outburst, a flight attendant appealed for help. Passengers leapt out

of their seats and grabbed the captain before pinning him to the floor for 15 minutes. Osborn is said to have passed out and was tied up with seat-belts.

The New York to Las Vegas flight diverted and landed in Amarillo, Texas.

The pilot yelled the words “Afghanistan” and “Israel” when taken off the jet.

Airline JetBlue described the incident as a "medical situation involving the captain". They said he was removed and taken to a medical facility.

The FBI is investigating.

Friday, March 30, 2012

TABLOIDS SAY

MEET BRITAIN’S BRAVEST FAMILY

Three VCs make the Goughs ‘truly remarkable’ Daily Mirror WHEN it comes to extraordinary courage, the Gough family really have it in their blood.

They have been labelled Britain’s bravest clan, with a record number of members having been awarded the Victoria Cross.

Three of the Goughs won the country’s highest military honour for bravery.

Their exploits in battle feature in a guide launched on Tuesday which lists for the first time all 1,353 recipients of the VC. General Sir Charles Gough was the first in the family to be bestowed the honour. His citation for one act of bravery during the Indian Mutiny in the 1850s said: “Attacked one of the enemy’s leaders and pierced him with his sword, which was carried out of his hand in the melee.

"He defended himself with his revolver, and shot two of the enemy.” Another of his feats was saving his brother, General Sir Hugh Gough, at the Siege of Lucknow in 1857.

Sir Hugh also won a VC for his heroism during the mutiny, when he was a 23-year-old lieutenant.

His citation says he “charged across a swamp and captured two

guns, although defended by a vastly superior body of the enemy”. In another battle he fought on despite a musket ball through his leg.

Charles’ son, Brigadier General Sir John Edmond Gough, won the family’s third VC for his exploits in the Third Somaliland Expedition in 1903, when he helped get a wounded officer on a camel.

The VC guide has been published online by ancestry.co.uk.

Miriam Silverman, from the website, said: “We can officially reveal the Goughs are the nation’s bravest family. Considering so few Victoria Cross medals have been awarded, the achievements of this family are truly remarkable.”

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Child-porn suspect leaps to death in cliff suicide pact with mother, 81 A 58-year-old man and his elderly mother are believed to have jumped to their deaths after he was arrested over child-porn images.

The bodies of Elizabeth Gosling, 81, and her son Christopher were found at the bottom of notorious suicide spot Beachy Head, near Eastbourne in East Sussex.

The pair, from Cardiff, are thought to have arrived at around 8.30am on March 21 in a black Vauxhall Vectra, which was found parked at the clifftop.

Two days before they died, Mr Gosling had been arrested on suspicion of possessing child abuse pictures. He had been freed on police bail pending further inquiries.

Detectives from Sussex Police believe he and his mother stayed in

Daily Mirror

the Eastbourne area on the night before they died. Their bodies were spotted by Coastguards.

Post-mortem examinations confirmed that they both died from multiple injuries. A police spokesman said: “Their deaths are not being treated as suspicious and the matter has been passed to the coroner, who will open inquests very shortly.”

South Wales Police said that, following the deaths, the matter had been referred to the Independent Police Complaints Commission.

The 530ft (161.5m) chalk cliffs at Beachy Head have long been a magnet for people wishing to end their lives.

ur fo in y a d e n o t s ju k MPs wor just 21 of LAZY MPs will spend stminster We the next 75 days at y genaril rdin rao ext thanks to an the in ps erous series of ga ar. end Parliamentary cal ons on They left the Comm Easter day Tuesday night for a 19more e littl g rkin wo ct break – in effe e 11.

Jun il unt r fou in day than one two e tak to The MPs are due mid ore bef off e tim of more spells s day of l dfu June, including a han Speech on before the Queen’s

“With so Payers’ Alliance, said: payers tax ues iss ng ssi pre many paying are y the will wonder why 17-day time a e be littl l wil so re nd the d spe An to May 9. for MPs the by .” ed ent end nm Whitsun recess ext scrutinising the Gover nd. terday Diamond Jubilee weeke Even some MPs yes days off excess wa ff e-o tim the They could get more d admitte orogation” – Mann said: when the date for “pr sive. Labour MP John the of d held in en are l ma we r for nde the “It is no wo is – n sio ses ry Parliamenta such contempt.” ployees will mentary announced. Most em Defenders of Parlia workplace busy on be l wil s spend 48 days in the MP say breaks . iod per e sam over the constituency work. the Tax Robert Oxley, of

Daily Express

Tweet justice for student in racist Muamba Twitter tirade

Liam Stacey...incitement

A TWITTER troll who mocked stricken footballer Fabrice Muamba after he collapsed on the pitch has been jailed for 56 days.

Liam Stacey, 21, admitted inciting racial hatred. He posted a string of vile comments on the microblogging site as medics desperately fought to save the player’s life.

The Sun Muamba, 23, suffered a heart attack on March 17 as his Bolton Wanderers team took on Spurs in the FA Cup. Stacey, a Swansea University biology student, was caught after police were swamped with complaints about his remarks. The

first of his messages began with “LOL. **** Muamba. He’s dead!!!”

Other Twitter users bombarded the student with criticism following his sick post. Stacey replied with a number of hateful racist comments.

Last week he admitted inciting racial hatred when he appeared at Swansea Magistrates’ Court.

Stacey’s lawyer Gareth Jones said that his client had drunk eight pints before his rant.

“He is completely ashamed of his behaviour that evening. His comments were vile, he admits that."

He added that Stacey was actually “a kind and caring person”.

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Wanted - a home for a homeless K9

Friday, March 30, 2012

Legion’s right Royal year

THE K9 Club is holding a dog adoption day on April 1 at the K9 Shop Calle Alfredo Kraus, Urb La Marina (close to the Tourist Information), from 10am to 2pm.

The adoption day will give people a chance to see some of the 40 rescue dogs K9 currently has in its care. All of them are urgently seeking new, loving homes.

K9 volunteers will bring dogs from the kennels to the shop but they need help with transport.

Anyone who can lend a hand should call Sheona on 664 891 382.

More information about the work of K9 club and dogs for adoption can be found at www.k9club.es

Manning the sales at Los Montesinos are David Laverick, Ted Marsh and Kath Allard

THE Royal British Legion Torrevieja Branch joined the St Patrick’s Day celebrations at Los Montesinos, with a stall selling RBL merchandise and second hand books.

The stall kept several RBL volunteers busy over a two-day period and proved a hit with visitors to the special St Patrick’s Day market.

But even though the big Irish fiesta is now over for another year, there is no let-up for RBL members, who are busy planning a host of activities - not least of which is a special celebration for the Queen’s 60th anniversary later in the year.

RBL is also organising a number of excursions to various parts of Spain, and running the new RBL Legionnaires Bowls Club, which meets every Tuesday and Saturday at 2pm at La Siesta Bowls Club.

RBL holds meetings on the second Friday of every month at Casa Ventura, San Luis. For details contact Pauline on 966 704 146.

FUN NIGHT OF SEX AND ROCK

MORE than 200 people packed Los Rosales Restaurante in Guardamar for the Rock With Adhoc Show last week.

Ronnie Taylor performs his humorous Elton John tribute. Below: Allo, Allo, it’s raffle time

The show starred Andy Jones, Nick Barker, Ronnie Taylor and Alan Warden, who all gave their services for free. Adhoc was raising funds for its upcoming play Sex Please We’re Willing, which will be staged on April 19, 20 and 21 at the School of Music in Los Montesinos. Doors open at 7.30pm with curtain up at 8pm.

Show-goers danced the night away to Thin Lizzy, Brian Adams and a very funny Elton John Tribute from Ronnie Taylor. Nick Barker and Alan Warden filled the dance floor with their their Status Quo tribute.

Adhoc’s publicity officer, Jax Lawson, surprised everyone when she took to the stage for a finale of Rocking All Over The World.

By this time the raffle had been called, and being Adhoc, it had a twist as company members appeared as characters from Allo, Allo, which they hope to stage in November.

Billie Gaddess, Adhoc’s founder member, as René was joined by Karen Love as Mimi for a quick cuddle away The stars of the Rock With Adhoc show team up for the grand finale from Madam Edith’s eyes.

Madam Edith, aka Jax Lawson, was horrified to find ‘er ‘usband in the arms of another.

HELP at Home Costa Blanca is seeking fundraising events planned to help its Cries of “more, more” qualified Spanish speaking UK and nursing and volunteer team continue the echoed at the end of the Spanish registered nurses and NVQ car- good work. show, which raised over 1300 ers to assist its volunteer teams helping On Good Friday, the charity is holding euros for Adhoc. people in the Orihuela Costa, Quesada, its Easter Fayre at Asturias Restaurnte, The money will be used to Rojales and Torrevieja areas.

Punta Prima, 11am - 4pm. And in the set up the production Sex A spokesperson said: “We have 14 bril- evening at Rincon del Crisis, Torretta II, Please We’re Willing, and a liant volunteers ready to work in La Torrevieja, there is a Carribbean donation will be made to the Marina, but we now need a Spanish Roadshow, with reggae music, BBQ, Montesinos charity ADIS- speaking UK and Spanish registered limbo dancing, stalls and fun activities MON, which helps disabled nurse who is qualified to assess clients for all ages.

On April 24, HAHCB celebrates its first people and disadvantaged and co-ordinate volunteers.”

Anyone fitting the requirements who is anniversary at the Emerald Isle, La children in the area.

For ticket information email interested should email info@helpath- Florida from 2pm to 6pm, with a fashion show, BBQ and entertainment. For more adhocspain@hotmail.com or omecb.org or call Norah on 659 245 552.

As usual, HAH has a number of information on HAH call 603 245 020. call on Jax on 677 600 809.

HELP needs nurses

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Friday, March 30, 2012

THIS Easter the esplanade of San Pedro del Pinatar will be transformed for the resort’s Sea World Exhibition.

Organisers have chosen to give the event an English name to lend it a more international feel.

From April 4 to 8 there will be a complete programme of events, including workshops on seahorses and Poseidon, sports fishing and diving, sailing and windsurfing, salt extraction and mud treatments. There will even be an oldfashioned fish auction.

San Pedro plans wet Easter Some activities will be free, but for others visitors will have to splash out a little.

Visitors can enjoy a ride on the tourist train, seafood tapas, an introduction to sailing and a diving course.

Plus, experts will explain the evolution of the Mar Menor, there will be pottery workshops using mud from the nearby salt lakes, and even dance classes.

Javier Pedrero will present his book The Secrets of the Mar Menor and there will be guided tours of the salt lakes and sand dunes.

Cookery and food lovers can learn all about local cuisine with a master class on how to cook caldero, a typical dish from the area.

Local lifeguards will give a demonstra-

tion of a sea rescue, using dogs trained in sea rescue techniques.

And, there will be opportunities to take part in a photography competition, try canoeing or see a theatre show.

For further information on the activities visit seaworldsanpedro.com where there is a schedule of events and online booking is available.

BACK TO THE FUTURE

Swim-king Adam switches on the style for medal double

LOCAL swimming sensation Adam Stewart won both a gold and a bronze medal in last weekend’s Campeonata Regional De Natacion at Molina De Segura in Murcia.

Judge Jenny Deakin (top left) with winners Jenny Robbins, Christiana Stame and Jackie Hall, and below with experienced group winner John Boak

Adam, 27, took gold in the 100m freestyle and bronze in the 50m backstroke. The backstroke medal was a particularly outstanding achievement for Adam, who normally swims freestyle and butterfly but fancied a change.

He is now training hard for the DSSF European Championships at the Quays in Southampton next month. This will be the last major event before the World Championships in Genoa, Italy in November.

Adam, who has Downs Syndrome, has competed all over the world since startingAdam takes a breather between races competition swimming in 2000 with the Pilar Swimming Club. He now swims with CN Torrevieja.

Adam lives with his dad Greig, mum Pauline and sister Lucy, who also has Picture: Colin Whitfield Downs Syndrome. Both children were adopted as babies, so Adam’s proud parents don’t know where his swimming talent came from.

But they are determined to do everything they can to support him.

Instrumental to his swimming success is Greig who admits his son refers to him as “the taxi driver” as he is constantly called upon to drive Adam to training sessions and competitions.

But with Adam’s incredible pool success, his father is more than happy to do his bit to help his boy fulfil his ambition of winning lots of medals for Spain.

However, with virtually no sponsorship, Adam’s sporting career is proving expensive.

The local expat community has got behind him, with VETERAN fundraisers Jeff and Norma Jukebox Legends and Downing head back to the UK this weekend Juniorstrikers offering special with mixed emotions, after nearly 30 years in support. Indeed, Junior strikexile. Most of that time was spent in Perth, ers are holding a sponsored Australia but they finally clocked off after sixpenalty shootout for Adam in and-a-half years at El Raso with a special Los Montesinos on April 3.

But this talented swimmer present from their many friends...an really could do with some engraved carriage clock. West Midlanders more support. Anyone who Jeff, 73, and belly-dance teacher Norma, 70, can help is asked to email have raised more than 3,000 euros for variplaya. pensioners @hotmail. ous charities during their time in Spain. com

CLOCKING OFF

Artists put PCN in the picture AN array of talented local artists entered their work in an art competition in aid of Paul Cunningham Nurses last Saturday.

Held at the Procomobel furniture store, the competition attracted more than 40 entries.

The competition was split into three sections – beginners, intermediates and experienced.

In the beginners group, Jackie Hall took first place, followed by Rod Day in second and Jenny Robbins and Christiana Stame in joint third.

The intermediates section was won by Dee Corpe with a single artist – Iris Luke – taking both second and third places.

In the experienced category, John Boak was declared the winner, while Gloria Howes, Pat Rae and Gail Watson were all awarded joint second place.

All the winners were presented with a certificate and a bottle of Cava by judge Jenny Deakin.

PCN said a special thank you to Anne Day who helped organise the competition and to all the judges. The charity also thanked Procomobel for hosting the contest.

The next Paul Cunningham Nurses event is a fashion show at La Herradura Restaurant in Los Montesinos on April 20 with Looking Good Boutique.

And, on May 6, PCN is teaming up with Bay Radio for Be Nice Day and an easy 5km walk around Rojales and Quesada. A more challenging 10km walk will also be held for more serious walkers. Details at www.paulcunninghamnurses.com, email sueinthesun@hotmail.co.uk or call 639 318 526.

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Friday, March 30, 2012 Friday, December 16, 2011

TUNING COMPANIES’ MADDEST MODIFIED CARS and no go though; a raft of upgrades can push power up to 800bhp, taking the top speed to the far side of 200mph.

BOULEVARD CUSTOMS URBAN WHIP

AC SCHNITZER TOPSTER AC Schnitzer generally creates discreet fast road cars for the connoisseur. But every so often it goes a bit mad and creates something rather less subtle. Perhaps the best example is the Z4-based Topster, complete with 450bhp M5 V8 power, built for the 2003 Frankfurt motor show.

Mercedes isn't often guilty of producing coollooking cars, but this one looks pretty neat to us. It's what happened when Boulevard Customs overhauled a GLK350 for the 2008 SEMA show. Dropped by 64mm and with 26inch chromed alloys, the speedster look works surprisingly well.

CHEVROLET NEWMAD

Where do you draw the line between a car that's been customised and one that's been merely tuned or 'upgraded'? Definitely a custom, the Newmad consumed 24,000 hours and cost an astonishing $1.3m to create.

Power comes from an 8125cc V8; its 540bhp gives a 145mph top speed.

serious no-compromise racer for the road.

ASI TETSU GTR There was a time when Bentleys were so exclusive that you didn't need to do this to them to make them stand out. And boy does the Tetsu GTR stand out! It's not all show

FAB DESIGN S60 BT BRABUS ROCKET

9FF GT9-R Taking the most extreme cars to come out of the Porsche factory, then comprehensively overhauling them, 9ff doesn't do things by halves. Take the 1105bhp GT9-R for example. Capable of 259mph, GT9-R production was limited to just 20 examples; this was a

Although Brabus tends to keep things discreet, overlooking something as mental as the Rocket wouldn't be on - after all, this is one of the world's fastest saloons. While the original Rocket, based on the first-generation Mercedes CLS could manage 227mph, the new one is capable of over 230mph.

CALLAWAY SPEEDSTER If you like your Corvettes on the spicy side, Callaway has long been happy to spice things up. And while the Speedster isn't as far-out as most of the other cars here, it's such a sensational-looking machine that we just couldn't overlook it. But it's quick too; with 650bhp, there's a 206mph top speed.

If you like the idea of driving a Mercedes, but find the standard lines just a bit too conservative, FAB Design will be happy to help. It'll take the outgoing SL for example, and fit lairy alloys plus a wide-arch body kit to create something rather less discreet. It's not subtle, but it is effective...

G-POWER TYPHOON RS V10 Want to give a Green palpitations? Then drive one of these; one of the least socially aware cars ever devised. In standard form the BMW X6M is barking; by the time GPower has done its stuff, there's a 900bhp twin-supercharged V10 and some bodywork that's none too subtle. To say the least.

CARLSSON C25 Like Brabus, Alpina and Callaway, Carlsson enjoys manufacturer status, so its CL65 AMG-based C25 doesn't wear Mercedes badges. With a 753bhp twin-turbo V12, it's rapid, but costly too - prices start at â‚Ź429,000 excluding taxes, with production capped at 25 examples.

GEIGER HUMMER Another one to inflame the ire of environmentalists the world over, the Hummer is pretty despised in standard guise. But fettle it as Geiger has done (it offers multiple varieties) and it can be only a matter of time before you find the tyres slashed or the windcsreen stoved in.

Friday, March 30, 2012

31

Great Wall Steed first Chinese car for UK The Great Wall Motor Company will become the first Chinese car brand to start volume sales in the UK market when the Steed double-cab pick-up truck goes on sale in April, priced from just £13,998.

Pictured right, the Great Wall Steed gets its debut at the 2012 Commercial Vehicle Show (Birmingham NEC, 24-26 April), and is playing the value card hard.

Not only does that £13,998 price – which excludes VAT, but still – make it cheaper than any other double-cab pick-up currently available, Great Wall is promising this is one Steed that won’t eat you out of house and home.

While full details are yet to be announced, it is stating the Steed will offer class-leading urban fuel economy from its 2.0-litre turbodiesel engine, and the lowest insurance ratings of any vehicle in the pick-up segment.

At this stage we’re still missing vital statistics about performance, payload and towing capacity, however. But we can tell

you it has a six-speed gearbox and drivetrain that can switch from two- to four-wheel drive on the move.

FORD UPGRADES FIESTA ECONETIC TO 85MPG

Ford has announced a series of upgrades to the frugal Fiesta Econetic, resulting in CO2 emissions reduced to 87g/km and a claimed 85.6mpg – a 12 per cent improvement overall.

To achieve these gains Ford has overhauled the Fiesta Econetic’s 95hp 1.6-litre TDCi turbodiesel engine, reducing friction, improving the combustion process and tweaking the engine management.

At the same time it’s also fitted stop-start and a “smart” regenerative charging system, as well as a new “EcoMode”. Improvements to the air conditioning system, the cooling fan and the alternator bring further gains.

This is in addition to an existing eco kit list that includes special aerodynamics, low rolling resist-

ance tyres, variable flow oil pump and gearshift indicator.

As a result the new Fiesta Econetic’s claimed 85.6mpg with 87g/km CO2 emissions represent significant improvements over the 78.5mpg and 95g/km CO2

claims of before.

Though it doesn’t help you with the road tax – since the Fiesta Econetic was already exempt – this should reduce your trips to the fuel station.

Good news in current circumstances.

That said, the Econetic isn’t

cheap. Available in Edge, Zetec and Titanium specifications, prices start at £14,445 – almost £1,500 more than the 1.4-litre TDCi alternative. However, that engine offers only 70hp and emits 107g/km.

The revised Ford Fiesta Econetic is on sale now in both three- and five-door variants, while the same updates have also been applied to the Econetic FiestaVan. This starts at £12,215, excluding VAT.

More info will be released next month.

As for the Great Wall Motor Company itself, it’s China’s largest SUV manufacturer and has been going for 35 years. It becomes the first Chinese brand to exhibit at the Commercial Vehicle Show, though it already exports vehicles to over 120 countries.

Imported by the same company that markets Subaru in the UK, the Steed goes on sale here through a brand new network of 40 Great Wall dealers.

Expect confirmation of further Great Wall products in the not too distant – intriguing names amongst the company’s current portfolio include the Coolbear, Florid and Hover. The Steed, incidentally, appears to be better known as the Wingle in China.

Great Wall may be the first Chinese car company to start a serious commercial venture here, but it won’t be the last. Geely – which bought Volvo last year – is another Chinese car brand heading our way; the Emgrand EC7 mid-size saloon and hatchback pairing are set to arrive before the end of the year.

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Friday, March 30, 2012

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 8 represents W and 19 represents Z, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Humble (6) 4 Commotion (6) 9 Medical instrument (7) 10 Spherical object (5) 11 Publish (5) 12 Surround (7) 13 Watchtower (11) 18 Guardian of museum (7) 20 Additional (5) 22 Once more (5) 23 Sudden forceful flow (7) 24 Dawdle (6) 25 Except when (6)

Down 1 Unusual person (6) 2 Pub game (5) 3 Heartfelt (7) 5 Strong desires (5) 6 Ground-breaker (7) 7 Spit (6) 8 Feeding only on plants (11) 14 Something bought at cheap price (7) 15 Disloyalty (7) 16 Bad handwriting (6) 17 Stroke lovingly (6) 19 Taut (5) 21 Brief and to the point (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Stand up, 5 Tubes, 8 Mechanics, 9 Let, 10 Patch, 12 Elegies, 13 Salvation Army, 15 Assagai, 17 Gasps, 19 Ego, 20 Authentic, 22 Steps, 23 Rat race.

Down: 1 Sum up, 2 Arc, 3 Drachma, 4 Prime minister, 5 Taste, 6 Billiards, 7 Satisfy, 11 Telescope, 13 Stamens, 14 Neglect, 16 Grass, 18 Sucre, 21 Tea.

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 1 Lofty pursuits, a right stop-start (4) 3 Calvin and company somehow are explosively unstable (8) 9 Craft, if used moving vehicles (7) 10 It's him or a big house (5) 11 Looks carefully and notes lamp, etc, out of order (12) 13 Sharp broken statue (6) 15 Piece of poetry found in Afghanistan, Zambia and Iran (6) 17 Anyway I'm full or then just ordinary (3,2,3,4) 20 Taking a good look and voting yes, we hear (5) 21 Worker takes princess back to get a feeler (7) 22 Headgear support and that's wrong (3,5)

23 Streak without South American tramp (4) Down 1 A motor vehicle and a broken down cart for a tyrant 2 A writer or two (5) 4 Take over company came up with container before day's end (6) 5 Storage spaces from camp torments management (12) 6 Grandma cutting cotton cloth (7) 7 Joker turns up in Dracula's castle (4) 8 Think again about that huge fort (12) 12 A big room, notice, is a sign of quality (8) 14 Holidaymaker from amidst our Istanbul trip (7) 16 Variety of stress (6) 18 Middle of the dinners (5) 19 You, a head start for sure (4)

STANDARD CLUES

23 Journey (4) Down 1 Despot (8) 2 Pair (5) 4 Inhabit (6) 5 Rooms (12) 6 Fabric (7) 7 Thick, stiff paper (4) 8 Reconsideration (12) 12 Authentication (8) 14 Holidaymaker (7) 16 Filter (6) 18 Interior (5) 19 Aye (4)

Across 1 Paintings etc (4) 3 Powerfully explosive (8) 9 Vehicles (7) 10 Country house (5) 11 Ponders (12) 13 Shrewd (6) 15 Lines of poetry (6) 17 Bog-standard (3,2,3,4) 20 Looking at (5) 21 Aerial (7) 22 Hooked post (3,5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Example, 5 Heads, 8 Pallets, 9 Bumps, 10 Libya, 11 Retinue, 12 Slayer, 14 Teased, 17 Accused, 19 Sum-up, 22 Thine, 23 Acreage, 24 Reeve, 25 Sadists.

Down: 1 Expel, 2 Ad-lib, 3 Peerage, 4 Ensure, 5 Habit, 6 Almonds, 7 Suspend, 12 Shatter, 13 Ascribe, 15 Ensured, 16 Ideals, 18 Swede, 20 Means, 21 Peers.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

3 letter words Urn Mood Elude Act Woo Name Maths Asp 4 letter words Neat Nerve Awn Amen Oath 7 letter words Bet Arms Open Dilemma Eau ASBO Rail Tendril Eel Aunt Redo 8 letter words End Buys Road Numerate Fun Dame Saga Restrain Moo Date Sloe 9 letter words Net Demo Soul Artillery Nod Easy Tome Guardroom One Eden Vole Headfirst Ore Edge 5 letter words Structure Par Erst Aorta 13 letter word Rob Girn Could Counteraction Spa Hour Crest Sty Mole

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across 1 Bolsa (para llevar algo) (3) 3 Basket (big) (5) 6 South (direction, region) (3) 8 Enfermedad (7) 9 Azulejos (en el suelo) (5) 10 Behind (at the back) (5) 11 Emperador (7) 12 To call (shout out, summon) (6) 14 Mirror (6) 17 Artículo (escrito) (7) 19 Parejas (5) 21 Late (5) 22 Más loco (7) 23 Day (24 hours) (3) 24 Granos (en la piel) (5) 25 Monja (3)

Down 1 Beret (5) 2 Gallery (7) 3 Ajedrez (5) 4 Hermana (6) 5 Pulpo (7) 6 To leave (5) 7 Rosary (religion) (7) 12 Loyalty (7) 13 Arqueros (7) 15 Edition (7) 16 Third (fraction) (6) 18 Job (task) (5) 19 Proyectos (intenciones) (5) 20 Sirena (5)

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Friday, March 30, 2012 Across 1 In which board game are words formed from letters in patterns similar to a crossword puzzle; each letter has a value and those values are used to score the game? (8) 7 Which word can mean a rigid structure that surrounds or encloses a picture, door, windowpane or a single game of snooker? (5) 8 Which 1977 'nervous romance' starred Woody Allen as a Jewish comedian who falls in love with a mid-western girl played by Diane Keaton? (5,4) 9 In tennis, what name is given to a serve that the receiver is unable to reach?

(3) 10 Supporters of Newcastle United are known as the what army? (4) 11/21 Who was chancellor of West Germany from 1982 to 1990 and of the reunified German nation from 1990 to 1998? (6,4) 13 What was the name of the singing partner of Renee, who topped the British singles charts in 1982 with Save Your Love? (6) 14 Sea, bladder, garden, harp and marsh are all types of which gastropod molluscs? (6) 17/13D Which Indian-born British novelist's best known works are Midnight's Children and The Satanic Verses? (6,7) 18 What first name is shared by Marx, the founder of modern communism and Baedeker, the founder of the German publishing house known for its guidebooks? (4) 20 What is the name of the artificial intelligence, the sentient on-board computer of the spaceship Discovery in Arthur C Clarke's 2001 A Space Odyssey that eventually goes rampant? (3) 22 Which new Nobel prize was set up in 1968 by the Bank of Sweden? (9)

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

23 Which alloy of iron and nickel with a negligible coefficient of expansion, is used in the making of clocks and scientific instruments? (5) 24 What name is given to an inhabitant of the capital of Germany or a doughnut with jam filling and vanilla icing? (8)

Down 1 Which black private eye has been played on film by actors Richard Rowntree and Samuel L Jackson? (5) 2 Which city located near the Irrawaddy river delta is the capital and largest city of Myanmar? (7) 3 Joan who was the American folk singer and political activist who interested young audiences in folk music during the 1960s? (4) 4 According to John 6:5-9, Jesus fed 5,000 men with two small fishes and five what? (6) 5 Which city is the the capital of Morocco? (5) 6 Selling England By The Pound, The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway and Abacab were all best selling albums by which band? (7) 7 What was the surname of the English novelist best known for his spy novels whose hero is the secret agent James Bond? (7) 12 What name is given to a person who harasses or persecutes someone with unwanted and obsessive attention? (7) 13 See 17 Across 15 What nationality were the composers Giuseppe Verdi and Antonio Vivaldi? (7) 16 According to The Bible, what was the name of the daughter of Herodias whose dancing beguiled Herod into giving her the head of John the Baptist? (6) 17 What name is given to a person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them? (5) 19 What name is given to the device that generates an intense beam of coherent monochromatic light (or other electromagnetic radiation) by stimulated emission of photons from excited atoms or molecules? (5) 21 See 11 Across

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH El trabajo - Work

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch.

(Answers below)

1. Which Song Gave The Group Hanson A Trans Atlantic Hit in 1997?

2. What Nationality Was Sylvia Who Had A 1974 Hit With 'Y Viva Espania'?

3. Who Composed The Planet Sweet?

4. Which Loser Was Winning In Both 'The Square' & The Charts In 1986?

5. Whose 1980 Debut Album Included The Song 'Thankfully Not Living In Yorkshire It Doesn't Apply'?

6. How Were New Kids On The Block Billed After A 2 Year Absence From The Charts With Their 1994 Efforts 'Dirty Dawg' & 'Nev 7. In The Everly Brothers Song '_Wake Up Little Suzie_'' What time do they wake up (when the movie's over)?

8. Name Disco Tex's group?

9. Which Trio Wrote The Diana Ross Hit Chain Reaction?

10. What Was A Castrato?

11. Who were the original four members of the pop group Genesis? Point for each?

1. MMM Bop 2. Swedish 3. Gustav Holst 4. Nick Berry 5.

Dexy's Midnight Runners 6. NKOTB 7. 4 O Clock 8. The Sex-O-Lettes 9. The Bee Gees 10. A Male Singer, Castrated As A Boy To Maintain A Child's Pitch 11. Peter Gabriel,Phil Collins, Mike Rutherford & Tony Banks

ANSWERS

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across: 1 Insomnia, 7 Spoke, 8 Artichoke, 9 DDT, 10 Cain, 11 Maquis, 13 Cagney, 14 Pinter, 20 Awl, 22 Excalibur, 23 Tears, 24 Honduras.

Down: 1/17A Isaac Asimov, 2/18 Sitting bull, 3 Mace, 4 Isobar, 5 Bonds, 6 Centaur, 7 Sequoia, 12 Delibes, 13 Canasta, 15 Thurber, 16 Poncho, 17 Alias, 19 Lords, 21 Vlad.

aficiones

jornalero

ambicioso

licenciatura

anuncio

obrero

bien

oferta

vestido

pedir

empleo

peon

entrevista

plantilla

experiencia

puesto

experimentado

rechazo

informes

titulo

Match the English and Spanish names of fruit and vegetables.

You will find the answers at the bottom of the page.

1.el anuncio, 2.la oferta, 3.el empleo, 4.una licenciatura, 5.el titulo, 6.la experiencia, 7.las aficiones, 8.la entrevista, 9.pedir informes, 10.bien vestido, 11.el rechazo, 12.ambicioso, 13.un puesto, 14.el obrero, Soduko

15.la plantilla, 16.el peón, 17.el jornalero, 18.experimentado. a.the day worker, b.to ask for references, c.the advertisement, d.the interview, e.the unskilled worker, f.experienced,

Span - Eng

Quizword

g.the job offer, h.well dressed, i.the staff, j.hobbies, k.the worker, l.employment, m.rejection, n.a degree, o.ambitious, p.a position, q.experience, r.qualification.

Answers: 1c, 2g, 3l, 4n, 5r, 6q, 7j, 8d, 9b, 10h, 11m, 12o, 13p, 14k, 15i, 16e, 17a, 18f.

music QUIZ

o a c p n x p r s l i r e a a z q i o l u o e i n a x v t y a t e c e a n d f d p s r s z h p i s n o n o i e e e n i o c v t t i e r t r t f p e v j e o b c u m i i i o s t i e o r g i w e l m r v l x e b r r p f r s i e o d e d l w v t n a u n a n p c h n p l a c n a t u q t e m p l e o x s j e l s d a m b i c i o s o e y v e i d o i c n u n a r h a f r r o a r u t a i c n e c i l l o n c e y o r e r b o f o i h i j v b l x v p g n b q z v b m

Fill It In

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Friday, March 30, 2012

Horoscopes

By Pandora

Aries March 21 - April 19 Many of the solutions given to you in life make you feel like there's no hope. This is true. Position yourself well, for the revolution is almost here. Try to avoid being too close to walls. Your vision won't fail so long as you avoid sticking forks into your eyes. You may start to question evolution today.

He’s taking my money Hello Rose. I am a 90year-old childless widow.

Several times a year I am invited to stay with my niece and her two sons.

The younger boy has, to my knowledge, been stealing small amounts of money from my purse on these occasions. I have, in the past, put this behaviour down to childish folly, but he has recently done it again although he is now 18 and at University. On the face of it he treats me with interested affection but his duplicitousness is making me ill. Do I confront him, tell his mother, or continue to keep schtum for the sake of family harmony?

These people are all I've got in the world.

ELLEN, La Mata Hello Ellen. When is he taking the money and where from? Do you leave your bag/purse in a bedroom or in the hall? You seem very sure that it is the younger boy how do you know this? Have you seen him?

I am not for one moment doubting that you are correct, but just wondering, if you know for sure, why you would leave your money where he can get at it.

It is despicable for someone to steal from a guest especially an elderly one like you. As I see it you have three choices.

Either you bring it into the open probably upsetting your niece very much and risking her taking his side (unless he has a history of doing this, which wouldn't surprise me).

If you do this then do be sure that you can prove it - i.e. that you have seen him take the money or seen him coming out of the room where the money was etc.

You can just mention it to him - again, be sure that you have proof as above. He might have assumed that you were vaguer and less on the ball than you evidently are and have been trying it on - what a low life! I don't know, though, if you might feel threatened a little bringing it up with just him.

You can make sure that your money is locked up tight so it is difficult to get at, or on your person at all times even taking your bag in to the bathroom with you if necessary.

Could you get a lockable suitcase and lock your money in it in your room and have the keys on you.

Perhaps you could spread your money about in different places so that he can't have a lot (although you do say he only takes small amounts probably hoping they won't be noticed).

Taurus April 20 - May 20 You may find solace in someone's choice of underwear today. Banter between two important people may sway you in your current ideas about progressing with your life.

However, until you hear this banter it is impossible to say which direction you'll take.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 Telling tales is pretty much what keeps me going. How about you? Your daily rituals are what keep you going. Avoid the temptation to change your ways, lest you become half the person you are today. Perhaps it's true that you're not the immense stud you once were.

Cancer June 21 - July 22

If you have a problem Romany Rose can help you with, email her at office@thecourier.es To be honest if I were you I would avoid the first option to avoid a breach with your only family, but it leaves such a bad taste to be treated like this. The third option is obviously the easiest. I do hope you can resolve this.

Adoption worries

Hello Rose. My father and his new partner have decided to adopt a child, as his partner does not have any children of her own. I live with my mother and see my father regularly, however I have never had the same relationship with him as I had, prior to him leaving my Mother and the family home.

When asked how I felt about the adoption, I said I was unsure and didn't believe that it would entirely affect me. However, as the process continues I am becoming more and more concerned. My sister & I are in our twenties and the adopted child will be merely a few years old. My first concern is that I will be unable to bond with the child, partly because of the age gap but also as he will not be a blood relative.

Part of me wonders if I will even resent the child for having a stable family life with my father around something which I was never able to have.

I realise that this may sound entirely selfish and unwarranted, particularly granted my age however it is currently something that is causing me a considerable amount of upset. After rupturing quite significantly with my father leaving, my family life has recently become quite stable and I am concerned that the new circumstances will cause further problems for my sister & me, with the poten-

tial for us to be pushed out in place of the adopted child.

AMY La Siesta Amy, You do not sound selfish at all and you’re completely justified in being afraid at how you will act towards the new child. It shows that you are not selfish as you have actually taken time out to get advice to stop you resenting the child. I suggest you spend time with you dad and help prepare for the new child as this will help you feel involved. Focus on the new baby as a positive to help bring you and your dad closer. Show what a mature big sister you can be by speaking to your dad’s new partner and offering to help her out. I am sure you will be a wonderful big sister and hopefully you will embrace this new child and all enjoy family days out with your dad and the new child. Just remember you will always be your dad’s child he may seem to be doing more for the new child but that will probably be because he feels the need to show that child more attention because unlike you and your sister he is your biological father. Unfortunately he will probably assume that you think he loves you because you are biologically related. Also have a word with your dad about your fears and ask him to involve you and your sister so that you can remain part of his family. A lot of the time families become distant because of the fact people assume things and others do not communicate how they feel.

Is it love?

Hello Rose. I have the most wonderful boyfriend.

He's funny, sweet, and spontaneous and works incredibly hard at his job which I find very sexy. But he's always busy all the

time because he works so much. When I do see him, it's for a night at the weekend and it's so wonderful and when we're together I feel so incredibly happy.

The second he leaves, I feel this awful emptiness inside me and until I see him again I can't stop feeling empty and I miss him so much. I've tried to keep myself busy so I don't think about him but I always get the exact same feeling when he leaves.

We're too young to settle down and find a place of our own because we're both establishing our careers. Although this sounds naive, I want to have everything with him.

But this huge feeling of emptiness is horrible and I don't know if I can put myself and my friends through it every time we see each other. Is this a destructive relationship?

Or is it love?

SARAH San Miguel Hello Sarah. A relationship needs two people to make it work. If your boyfriend is more committed to his job than to you, I'm not sure there is any future, regardless of how you feel. If you sit down with him and try to make him understand how much you miss him and want to see more of him, and he says sorry, this is how it is, however hard it is, you are going to have to evaluate how much you love him compared to how much you see him. Do you want to spend the next 5 years seeing him once a week because he's working so hard? Spending 5 years scrabbling around for things to do on your own, having to go to parties and get together alone because he's working/is too tired?

Try and sort it with him, and if you can't, it may be that he/you/both of you aren't ready for this particular relationship.

Of course, he may not have a clue how much you miss him in the week and might jump at the chance to spend more time with you!

The odds on you surviving the day with your sanity intact are low. Blue moon caught you standing alone, but ensure you're not also caught short this weekend. Skeletons in your closet are a sign that you have an eventful life and are nothing to be embarrassed about.

Leo July 23 - August 22 If Jesus were here, he'd probably bless you in light of what's going to happen to you today.

Dimples can appear at any time today in your otherwise flawless but kind of saggy skin.

You're as transparent as a blast of canned air - try to be more complex by wearing hats that are clearly too small for your head.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Monsters plague your every move and will soon be there to eat your flesh. Mouldy coffee cups may not be breeding the penicillin you hope they are. Your ideas are plentiful, but are your plenties ideaful? Other bulls**t may come your way today. Death is the stark figure in the corner that is staring at you and rubbing it's hand-bones.

Libra September 23 - October 22 The colours you see around you are intended to give you an idea of three dimensional space. Close your eyes and you become a dangerous walking buffoon. The darkness you experience when you close your eyes might be accompanied by a low demonic growl today.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Hearing clicking noises in your head is not a good sign for you today. Dismiss this horoscope at your peril: You WILL have sex today.

Spiders have feelings too - an undeniable but ultimately useless fact when the vacuum cleaner strikes! Shallow puddles may deceive you today.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 Only with your amazing skills were you able to find this horoscope, and for that you will be rewarded with only good news. If life makes you feel like dancing, dance the night away.

Login to every site you can and you'll soon understand what the meaning of the internet is.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Horoscopes have always had a tendency to be wrong for you, but today's will be a peach. The dead are unlikely to rise from their graves today, but this should not deter you from starting your "Anti-Zombie" fan club.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Dogs can be a man's best friend or a woman's best friend. They could also be a child's best friend, or a cat's best friend. Dogs are totally flexible. Although you may feel justified in doing what you do, there are definitely times in which your conscience will be pricked.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 Having to stop today and go to sleep will seem like a prison sentence. Any long-lasting thoughts about colours will fade later today.

There are always good reasons to ask a fellow human to "step outside", and you may be forced to do this over the coming week.

35

Friday, March 30, 2012

TRELI ON THE TELLY Everyone a winner as Beeb finds its Voice

WELL, what a surprise!

Bumper audiences for both The Voice and Britain’s Got Talent last Saturday - and that’s the only kind of comparison worth making, because both shows are very different, but equally entertaining.

I wasn’t disappointed at all with The Voice on BBC1, because I’ve watched it on American television and knew the Beeb had an absolute winner on its hands.

The four coaches: will.i.am, Jessie J, Sir Tom Jones and Danny O’Donoghue, were like four kids playfully fighting over a bag of sweets, and created a real positive spirit which was a million miles away from the bear-pit nastiness of The X Factor.

I didn’t hear them utter one talent show cliché either. So well done on that score as

with ALEX TRELINSKI well. There was plenty of good singing talent on display as the coaches sat with their backs to the vocalists before deciding whether or not they fancied them on their team.

And I loved the power of the contestants to choose who they wanted as the horse-trading started.

Tom Jones, with his Elvis

The Voice... lots of singing talent

CAST: Antonio Banderas, Salma Hayek, Zach Galifianakis, Billy Bob Thornton DIRECTOR: Chris Miller RATING: 4/5 RUNNING TIME: 90 min.

One of the few consistently bright spots in the last few Shrek movies was the swashbuckling Puss in Boots. This eponymous film tells the tale of how he became the most feared cat in the land.

Would it surprise you learn that Puss in Boots was an orphan? Well, he was – but our story begins with Puss [voiced by Antonio Banderas] on the run from the law and seeking momentary refreshment in a bar. Though greeted with laughter, he soon puts the bar’s patrons on notice that he is not to be trifled with – and soon learns of the exploits of the villainous Jack

[Billy Bob Thornton] and Jill [Amy Sedaris], who have allegedly come into possession of some beans of the magical variety.

That leads us into a flashback of Puss as an outcast in an orphanage run by the maternal Imelda [Constance Marie], where he befriends another outcast, a glib egg named Humpty Alexander Dumpty [Zach Galafianakis].

Sadly, Puss was betrayed by Humpty – which has led to his

stories, being pitted against will.i.am’s tales of Michael Jackson were a hoot as one singer had an almost impossible choice to make. We got no stupid crackpot acts, and as everybody kept on saying, it really was about the voice.

The production values were high and, make no mistake about it, ITV (who were beaten by the Beeb to the rights for the show) are worried about what it’s going to do to their early evening ratings.

I’ll never turn my back on The X Factor because it’s a wonderfully entertaining show, but it crossed the line too much in some of the rubbish coming from the new judges last autumn. And programmes like The Voice and the re-vitalised American Idol on ITV2 have taken singing competitions back to what they should be about - and that’s talent.

It’s rare to get an instant hit on TV these days, but the Beeb have had two massive ones in four months with The Voice popping up to reinforce the big success of Call the Midwife earlier in the year.

Surprisingly that couldn’t be said about Upstairs Downstairs, which finished last Sunday on BBC1. I really enjoyed the series, but perhaps too many people were nostalgic for the old days of Hudson and Mrs Bridges, and didn’t quite bargain for a very different take on events at Eaton Place. I fear we may have seen the last of this revival, which is a great shame.

Britain’s Got Talent returned to ITV1 on Saturday night with a bang, as I knew it would. It had a more glossy expensive feel about it compared to recent years, and Simon Cowell was back fulltime as a judge.

Ant and Dec were as funny and mischievous as ever behind the scenes, and David Walliams as a judge hit the mark straight away, especially with his interesting chemistry with Cowell.

Alesha Dixon was never going to have any problems, but I found the decision to put in former Baywatch star, Carmen Electra, as a temporary replacement for Amanda Holden, to be somewhat bizarre. She had absolute nothing of any interest to say, and seemed bemused by it all.

As for the talent, we got the usual mix of the brilliant and the rubbish. I reckon the Welsh boys choir is going to go all the way, and we had, surprise surprise, a Su Bo moment as unlikely looking 17-year-old, Jonathan Antoine, stunned the judges with his operatic singing.

If Cowell has given BGT a kick up the backside, then it seems to have had the desired effect based on the opener. It was a very entertaining hour of viewing.

If The Voice wasn’t bad enough news for ITV, then the departure of the only

PUSS IN BOOTS U being hunted by the law.

Naturally, our lovable rogue figures that if he can get the beans and bring the goose that lays the golden eggs to San Ricardo, perhaps it will make up for his past transgression. Unfortunately, Puss runs into one obstacle after another – first, Kitty Softpaws [Salma Hayek] and then, his old friend, the Egg. What makes Puss in Boots superior to all but the first film in the Shrek series is that – for

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all its homage’s to other films, and unique take on as many fairytale characters as time allows, it is a story that is crafted to showcase character as much as action. And everything has consequences – there’s a reason why Kitty Softpaws is so good at picking pockets, for example. Another plus is the writers really know cat behaviour and plumb it for some classic comic moments.

At the least expected moments, Puss or Kitty will do something completely feline, just to keep us aware that our heroes are cats!

Puss in Boots is even better than the trailers promise.

Harry Hill’s final TV Burp was as good as his first ten yearsago

funny guy on the network, Harry Hill, has left their comedy cupboard looking distinctly bare. His final TV Burp show was as good as his first some ten years earlier, with Harry in great form and a cast of thousands popping in.

I especially loved Dominic Littlewood being doused in a nasty looking brown substance, as well as the tribute song to Amanda Lamb. It was sheer madness, and only Harry could carry it off.

Good luck to him in the future, and what a shame ITV couldn’t have given him a better send-off, unless they somehow believe they can change his mind about leaving.

It’s easy to get cynical about a whole evening of TV being devoted to a charity

raiser, but I thought Sport Relief was absolutely on the money last Friday night on BBC1. There were some hilarious moments mixed in with some very distressing footage of youngsters dying in African hospitals, all because they did not have a simple injection that would have prevented such heartwrenching scenes.

These are rare moments when television can do a lot of good, and the £50 million raised on the night was astonishing. Might I suggest that the production team are seconded to help sort out the Children in Need programme in November, which is normally such an embarrassing shambles of amateurism that it has John Logie Baird turning in his grave every year.

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Friday March 30 00:35 This Week 01:20 Skiing Weatherview 01:25 Panorama 01:55 Countryfile 02:55 Hidden 03:55 Orbit: Earth's Extraordinary Journey 04:55 Britain's First Photo Album 05:25 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 The 1952 Show 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 The Sheriffs Are Coming 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Secrets and Words 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Jedward's Big Adventure 16:35 Lockie Leonard 17:00 12 Again 17:30 The Owl 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Titanic with Len Goodman 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 One Night

00:20 The Tube 01:20 Medium 02:05 Medium 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Schools - Gang Life 04:30 Schools - The Charles Dickens Show: Christmas 04:50 Schools - In My Shoes: Rotterdam 05:00 Schools - In My Shoes: Germany & The Netherlands

06:00 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 07:50 08:00 08:30 08:45 08:55 09:00 09:25 09:30 09:35 09:45 09:50 10:05 10:20 10:30 10:40 10:55 11:20 11:25 11:30 11:40 12:00 12:30 13:00 14:30 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 Mouth 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 23:00 23:30

Schools - In My Shoes: China Harry and Toto Lunar Jim Raa Raa the Noisy Lion Octonauts Dipdap Pinky Dinky Doo Roar League of Super Evil Eliot Kid Newsround Bear Behaving Badly Shaun the Sheep Alphablocks Abadas Numtums The Pingu Show Tinga Tinga Tales Driver Dan's Story Train Mike the Knight Andy's Wild Adventures Tree Fu Tom Zingzillas Zingbop Chuggington: Badge Quest Cloudbabies Waybuloo In the Night Garden BBC World News A Stitch in Time Weakest Link Weakest Link Helicopter Heroes Flog It! Ten of the Best Breakaway Put Your Money Where Your Is Just a Minute Eggheads Coast Mastermind Mastermind Gardeners' World Reverse Missionaries Twenty Twelve Newsnight

00:35 Take Me Out 01:30 ITV News Headlines 03:35 Tonight 04:00 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Poms in Paradise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Benidorm 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Words of Captain Scott

POMS IN PARADISE New series. Every year around 30,000 Britons emigrate to Australia and many of them settle in Sydney.

This documentary follows the stories of expats who have made their home in the city, beginning with a man preparing to get married, a paramedic and the owners of a B&B.

00:00 Random Acts 00:05 Embarrassing Bodies 01:10 The Shooting Gallery 02:05 China: Triumph and Turmoil 03:00 Rare Chicken Rescue 03:30 The Bible: A History 04:25 The Crucified Soldier 05:20 Time Team 06:15 Countdown 07:00 Sali Mali 07:05 The Treacle People 07:15 The Hoobs 07:40 The Hoobs 08:05 Freshly Squeezed 08:35 According to Jim 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Frasier 10:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 11:00 The Food Hospital 12:00 You Deserve This House 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 13:35 Channel 4 Presents 13:40 Ice Cold in Alex 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 18:30 Four in a Bed 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Come Dine with Me 22:00 The Million Pound Drop Live 23:35 Rude Tube

01:10 SuperCasino 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Wildlife SOS 05:45 Wildlife SOS 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 Michaela's Wild Challenge 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Milkshake! Monkey 07:50 Peppa Pig 07:55 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:50 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 LIVE with Gabby 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 London: The Inside Story 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Wandering Eye 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Revealed 21:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 22:00 The Mentalist 23:00 Castle 23:55 Law & Order: Criminal Intent

37

Saturday March 31 00:35 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:45 Man on Fire 03:00 Weatherview 03:05 Natural World 04:05 Question Time 05:05 Antiques Road Trip 05:50 On the Road With 06:00 BBC News 06:30 Our World 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live 12:30 The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking with Rachel Khoo 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 13:15 Football Focus 14:00 British Olympic Dreams 14:30 World Olympic Dreams 15:00 Bargain Hunt 16:00 Cash in the Attic 16:45 Weakest Link 17:30 Final Score 18:10 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:30 A Question of Sport 19:00 Winter Wipeout 20:00 The Voice UK 21:20 The National Lottery: In It to Win It 22:10 Casualty 23:00 BBC News; Weather 23:20 National Lottery Update

00:00 The Review Show 00:45 Weather 00:50 The Year of Living Dangerously 02:40 Click 03:00 BBC News 03:30 The Record Review 04:00 BBC News

04:30 04:45 05:00 05:05 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 08:00 Lab 08:30 08:40 09:05 09:35 10:00 10:30 11:00 11:30 12:00 12:25 12:40 13:00 13:20 15:45 17:10 18:10 20:30 21:00 22:00 22:30

Click Newswatch BBC News Close Harry and Toto Lunar Jim Raa Raa the Noisy Lion Chuggington Pinky Dinky Doo Richard Hammond's Blast Dennis and Gnasher The Scooby-Doo Show Pixelface Prank Patrol Down Under Ultimate Sports Day Ultimate Sports Day Animals at Work My Life Hacker Time OOglies MOTD Kickabout Coast Becket All for Love Flog It! Match of the Day Live Dad's Army How God Made the English Have I Got Old News for You Arena

00:35 When Ali Came to Britain 01:30 The Zone 03:30 Zeppelin 05:15 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:25 CITV 10:25 ITV News 10:30 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 11:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 12:25 This Morning: Saturday 13:25 Murder, She Wrote 14:25 ITV News and Weather 14:39 Meridian Weather 14:40 A Cinderella Story 16:35 Forever Young 18:25 Meridian News and Weather 18:40 ITV News and Weather 19:00 New You've Been Framed!

19:30 Harry Hill's TV Burp 20:00 All Star Family Fortunes 21:00 Britain's Got Talent 22:05 Take Me Out 23:20 ITV News and Weather 23:34 Meridian Weather 23:35 Forgetting Sarah Marshall

AVATAR James Cameron's epic science-fiction fantasy, starring Sam Worthington, Sigourney Weaver and ZoĂŤ Saldana. Paraplegic marine Jake Sully takes over his dead brother's mission on the distant planet of Pandora, where, by fusing his mind with a genetically engineered native body, he is required to infiltrate and gather intelligence about the local population. But Jake's loyalties become divided when he discovers a clandestine plot to drive out the locals and gain access to the planet's rich mineral reserves.

00:40 The Mad Bad Ad Show 01:25 Le Donk & Scor-Zay-Zee 02:45 Random Acts 02:50 My Name Is Earl 03:40 Hung 04:05 Hung 04:35 A Ninja Is for Life, Not Just for Christmas 04:40 Reasons to Be Cheerful 04:55 Privileged 05:35 90210 06:15 Countdown 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 The Grid 08:25 FIM World Superbikes 08:50 Channel 4 Presents 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 Koko Pop 10:25 The Wanted: Backstage in Brazil 11:00 Charlie's Angels 11:55 Come Dine with Me 12:55 The Big Bang Theory 13:25 The Big Bang Theory 13:55 The Simpsons 14:25 The Simpsons 14:55 Channel 4 Racing 17:05 Channel 4 Presents 17:10 Come Dine with Me 19:15 Channel 4 News 19:45 4thought.tv 19:50 Avatar

00:50 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 Wildlife SOS 05:45 Wildlife SOS 06:10 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:35 HouseBusters 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 City of Friends 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Igam Ogam 08:00 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:20 Family!

08:30 Make Way for Noddy 08:45 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:55 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:30 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 Animal Rescue Squad 11:15 Holiday Heaven on Earth 11:45 Mirror Mirror: Movie Special 12:15 Police Interceptors 13:15 Revealed 14:15 Battle of Britain 16:50 Operation Daybreak 19:15 5 News Weekend 19:20 NCIS 20:10 NCIS 21:00 NCIS 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 CSI: NY 23:55 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 23:00 The Million Pound Drop Live

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Sunday April 1 00:45 The Football League Show 02:05 Weatherview 02:10 BBC News 02:30 The Bottom Line 03:00 BBC News 03:30 Dateline London 04:00 BBC News 04:30 On the Road With 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 The Record Europe 07:00 Breakfast 08:35 Match of the Day 10:00 The Andrew Marr Show 11:00 The Big Questions 12:00 Country Tracks 13:00 Sunday Politics 14:05 EastEnders 15:55 Bargain Hunt 16:40 Escape to the Country 17:40 Songs of Praise 18:15 Titanic with Len Goodman 18:45 Land Girls 19:30 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 20:00 Countryfile 21:00 Antiques Roadshow 22:00 Silent Witness 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather

23:25 Room 101 - Extra Storage 00:00 The Zoo In Winter 00:45 The Sarah Millican Television

Programme 01:15 The Salton Sea 02:50 Close 07:00 Harry and Toto 07:10 Lunar Jim 07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Pinky Dinky Doo 08:00 Richard Hammond's Blast Lab 08:30 Dennis and Gnasher 08:40 The Owl 08:40 The Scooby-Doo Show 09:05 Paradise Cafe 09:30 Deadly 60 Bites 09:30 Wingin' It 10:00 Friday Download 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 4 for Texas 14:20 Ill Met by Moonlight 16:05 The Wind and the Lion 18:00 Flog It! 19:00 TOTP2 20:00 Sandhurst 21:00 Top Gear 22:00 The Falklands Legacy with Max Hastings 23:00 Match of the Day 2

01:30 04:00 04:45 06:30 07:00 08:25 10:25 10:30 11:30 12:30 13:30 13:34 13:35 14:05 15:05 16:40 18:40 18:55 19:10 Blood 22:00 23:00 23:14 23:15

ITV News Headlines In Plain Sight ITV Nightscreen ITV Morning News Mini CITV CITV ITV News Ade in Britain May the Best House Win Dickinson's Real Deal ITV News and Weather Meridian Weather You've Been Framed!

Britain's Got Talent Columbo: a Case of Immunity Midsomer Murders Meridian News and Weather ITV News and Weather Harry Potter and the HalfPrince Titanic ITV News at Ten and Weather Meridian Weather Perspectives: Lenny Henry

HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF BLOOD PRINCE The sixth in the blockbuster fantasy adventure series, starring Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson. The ruthless Death Eaters announce the return of their master, Lord Voldemort, with a series of attacks on London. As disaster looms, Professor Dumbledore brings former tutor Horace Slughorn back to Hogwarts so that young wizard Harry Potter can learn from him the secrets of Voldemort's power.

00:35 Alfie 02:30 Last Days 04:10 Dish 04:20 Mesh 04:25 Franklin & Bash 05:05 Privileged 05:45 90210 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Road to London 2012: That Paralympic Show 08:30 Channel 4 Presents 08:35 Sailing 09:00 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:25 Frasier 11:00 Sunday Brunch 13:00 The Big Bang Theory 13:30 The Big Bang Theory 14:00 The Simpsons 14:30 The Simpsons 15:00 Addams Family Values 16:45 Aliens in the Attic 18:25 Time Team 19:25 Deal or No Deal 20:25 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Disasters at Sea: Why Ships Sink 22:00 Homeland 23:10 Sorority Row

00:50 Inside Hollywood 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Great Scientists 05:20 Great Scientists 05:50 Rough Guide to Eco Escapes 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 City of Friends 07:35 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Castle Farm 07:55 Igam Ogam 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:10 Bananas in Pyjamas 08:25 Family!

08:35 Make Way for Noddy 08:45 Milkshake! Monkey 08:50 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 09:55 Milkshake! Show Songs 10:00 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Mist: Sheepdog Tales 11:00 Inside Hollywood 11:10 Grey's Anatomy 12:05 Big Body Squad 13:05 Emergency Bikers 14:05 Cowboy Builders 15:00 Winnie the Pooh: Springtime with Roo 16:15 High School Musical 3: Senior Year 18:25 5 News 18:30 Mrs Doubtfire 21:00 Once Upon a Time 22:00 Rush Hour 2 23:40 In Hell

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Monday April 2 00:05 The Syndicate 01:05 The Sky at Night 01:25 Weatherview 01:30 Armando's Tale of Charles Dickens 02:30 Holby City 03:30 One Night 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Animal 24:7 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 My Worst Deal 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Horrible Histories 16:35 Diddy Dick & Dom 16:35 Lockie Leonard 17:00 All Over the Place 17:30 The Owl 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 Panorama 22:00 Silent Witness 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 A Question of Sport

00:00 00:30 02:35 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 07:00 07:10

Twenty Twelve Michael Collins The Bottom Line Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Close Harry and Toto Lunar Jim

07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Dipdap 07:50 Pinky Dinky Doo 08:00 Roar 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:45 Eliot Kid 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Bear Behaving Badly 09:20 Shaun the Sheep 09:30 Alphablocks 09:35 Abadas 09:45 Numtums 09:50 Little Charley Bear 10:00 Buzz and Tell 10:05 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:20 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:35 Small Potatoes 10:40 Andy's Wild Adventures 10:55 Tree Fu Tom 11:20 Zingzillas Zingbop 11:25 Dipdap 11:30 64 Zoo Lane 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 Hell Drivers 14:15 Animal Park 15:15 To Buy or Not to Buy 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Breakaway 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Just a Minute 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 Castle Commando 21:00 Chaplains: Angels of Mersey 21:30 The Little Paris Kitchen: Cooking with Rachel Khoo 22:00 Modern Spies 23:00 Mock the Week 23:30 Weather

00:15 Premiership Rugby Union 01:10 ITV News Headlines 03:30 River Monsters 04:20 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 The Dales 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Scott & Bailey 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 The Agenda

LITTLE NICKY Comedy starring Adam Sandler, Patricia Arquette and Harvey Keitel. When Satan's rebellious sons Adrian and Cassius attempt to oust their father from power by fleeing to Earth, it falls upon the Antichrist's youngest son Nicky to protect the paternal domain by returning his brothers to Hell.

01:05 The Descent 02:55 5x2 04:30 Meeting Helen 04:40 Honeymoon 05:10 Hollyoaks 07:15 The Hoobs 07:40 The Hoobs 08:05 Freshly Squeezed 08:35 According to Jim 09:00 According to Jim 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:00 Frasier 10:35 Frasier 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 11:30 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 13:35 River Cottage Bites 13:45 The Quiet Man 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 18:30 Four in a Bed 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Damien Hirst: The First Look 22:00 Embarrassing Bodies 23:00 Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares USA

01:35 The World of Stupid Criminals 02:05 SuperCasino 05:00 The FBI Files 05:50 Rough Guide to Islands 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Milkshake! Monkey 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 LIVE with Gabby 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 London: The Inside Story 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 The Mentalist 16:10 Defending Our Kids: the Julie Posey Story 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Cowboy Builders 21:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 22:00 Little Nicky 23:55 Anger Management

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Tuesday April 3 00:05 Late Kick Off 00:35 The Estate 01:05 Lawn Dogs 02:45 Weatherview 02:50 Wild About Pandas 03:50 One Night 04:50 Antiques Road Trip 05:35 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Animal 24:7 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 My Worst Deal 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Horrible Histories 16:35 Diddy Dick & Dom 17:00 All Over the Place 17:30 The Owl 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 21:00 Holby City 22:00 The Syndicate 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News 23:30 National Lottery Update 23:35 Who Do You Think You Are? US

00:20 02:10 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00 05:30 05:35 06:05

The Human Factor Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday HARDtalk The Super League Show Close

07:00 07:10 07:20 07:35 07:45 07:50 08:00 08:30 08:45 08:55 09:00 09:20 09:30 09:35 09:45 09:50 10:00 10:05 10:20 10:30 10:35 10:40 10:55 11:20 11:25 11:30 11:40 12:00 12:30 14:15 15:15 16:00 16:45 17:30 18:15 Mouth 19:00 19:30 20:00 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:30

Harry and Toto Lunar Jim Raa Raa the Noisy Lion Chuggington Dipdap Pinky Dinky Doo Roar League of Super Evil Eliot Kid Newsround Bear Behaving Badly Shaun the Sheep Alphablocks Abadas Numtums Little Charley Bear Buzz and Tell Tinga Tinga Tales Driver Dan's Story Train Chuggington: Badge Quest Small Potatoes Andy's Wild Adventures Tree Fu Tom Zingzillas Zingbop Dipdap 64 Zoo Lane Waybuloo In the Night Garden Tiger Bay Animal Park To Buy or Not to Buy Helicopter Heroes Flog It! Breakaway Put Your Money Where Your Is Just a Minute Eggheads Coast The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation Horizon Never Mind the Buzzcocks Weather

00:05 Mayday Mayday 00:35 Piers Morgan's Life Stories 01:30 The Zone 03:35 Champions League Weekly 04:00 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Countrywise Kitchen 21:00 Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Celebrity 22:00 Smugglers 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Benidorm

THE UNDATEABLES New series. Documentary following people with restrictive health conditions as they search for romance, and experience the delights and pitfalls of blind dates, matchmaking and speed dating. Amateur radio enthusiast Richard has Asperger's syndrome, and has very particular demands of any potential partner, while trainee teacher Penny fears a genetic disorder that has made her bones extremely brittle will leave her struggling to keep up on a date.

00:00 Homeland 01:10 Random Acts 01:15 Damien Hirst: Thoughts, Work, Life 02:05 Death Row 03:00 Never Die Alone 04:30 Franklin & Bash 05:15 Privileged 05:55 90210 06:35 Countdown 07:20 The Hoobs 07:45 The Hoobs 08:15 Freshly Squeezed 08:40 According to Jim 09:05 According to Jim 09:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:05 Frasier 10:35 Frasier 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 11:30 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 The Fabulous Baker Brothers 13:35 River Cottage 13:50 Father Goose 16:05 Channel 4 Presents 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 18:30 Four in a Bed 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Supersize vs Superskinny 22:00 The Undateables 23:00 Facejacker 23:35 Hit the Road Jack

01:50 Inside Hollywood 02:00 SuperCasino 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Wildlife SOS 05:45 Wildlife SOS 06:10 HouseBusters 06:35 HouseBusters 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:40 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Milkshake! Monkey 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 LIVE with Gabby 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 London: The Inside Story 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:10 Let Me Call You Sweetheart 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Eddie Stobart: Trucks and Trailers 21:00 Rory McGrath's Pub Dig 22:00 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 23:00 CSI: NY 23:55 CSI: Miami

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Wednesday April 4 00:20 Lionel Richie at the BBC 01:20 Weatherview 01:25 The Apprentice 02:25 One Night 03:25 We Won't Drop the Baby 04:15 Britain's First Photo Album 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Animal 24:7 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 My Worst Deal 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Horrible Histories 16:35 Diddy Dick & Dom 17:00 All Over the Place 17:30 The Owl 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 21:00 Waterloo Road 22:00 The Apprentice 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Sexism In Football?

00:20 WikiLeaks: The Secret Life of a Superpower 01:20 How God Made the English 02:20 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 Newsday 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 04:50 Close 07:00 Harry and Toto

07:10 Lunar Jim 07:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Dipdap 07:50 Pinky Dinky Doo 08:00 Roar 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:45 Eliot Kid 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Bear Behaving Badly 09:20 Shaun the Sheep 09:30 Alphablocks 09:35 Abadas 09:45 Numtums 09:50 Little Charley Bear 10:00 Buzz and Tell 10:05 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:20 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:35 Small Potatoes 10:40 Andy's Wild Adventures 10:55 Tree Fu Tom 11:20 Zingzillas Zingbop 11:25 Dipdap 11:30 64 Zoo Lane 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 Skyrunners 14:00 See Hear 14:30 Animal Park 15:15 To Buy or Not to Buy 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Breakaway 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Just a Minute 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 The Fisherman's Apprentice with Monty Halls 21:00 Our Food 22:00 Woolly Mammoth: Secrets from the Ice 23:00 The Apprentice: You're Fired!

23:30 Weather

00:35 Ladette to Lady: Australia 01:30 ITV News Headlines 04:00 Crossing Jordan 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 UEFA Champions League: Extra Time

COWBOY TRADERS

New series. The Cowboy Builders team investigates rogue traders, with Dominic Littlewood confronting them and Melinda Messenger trying to help their victims. They begin by taking on a bridal shop owner who failed to deliver the items promised for one wedding, and left Lucy Ward and Dan Stroven with no option but to cancel their big day when the store shut without notice. The presenters discover the proprietor is still operating and try to get some answers, as well as setting out to organise a successful wedding for one couple.

00:10 Random Acts 00:15 Desperate Housewives 01:10 Poker 02:10 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:40 The Grid 03:10 Sailing 03:35 Late Night Poker 04:35 FIM World Superbikes 05:00 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind: Ultra Running 05:05 Road to London 2012: Paralympics Extra 06:00 Grudge Match 06:10 Full Metal Challenge 07:10 The Treacle People 07:20 The Hoobs 08:15 Freshly Squeezed 08:40 According to Jim 09:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:05 Frasier 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 The Fabulous Baker Brothers 13:40 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 13:45 Never So Few 16:05 Channel 4 Presents 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 18:30 Four in a Bed 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Four Rooms 22:00 One Born Every Minute 23:00 10 O'Clock Live 23:55 Facejacker

00:55 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:50 SuperCasino 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Wildlife SOS 05:45 Wildlife SOS 06:10 HouseBusters 06:35 HouseBusters 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:10 Peppa Pig 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Milkshake! Monkey 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 LIVE with Gabby 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 London: The Inside Story 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: NY 16:15 Montana Sky 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Ultimate Police Interceptors 21:00 Cowboy Traders 22:00 NCIS 23:00 Law & Order: Criminal Intent

42

Thursday April 5 00:35 The Syndicate 01:35 Weatherview 01:40 See Hear 02:10 Watchdog 03:10 One Night 04:10 Newsday 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 Newsday 05:30 Panorama 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Animal 24:7 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 My Worst Deal 12:45 Cash in the Attic 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather; Regional News 16:05 Horrible Histories 16:35 Diddy Dick & Dom 17:00 All Over the Place 17:30 The Owl 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 20:30 BBC News; Regional News 21:00 Watchdog 22:00 Land of the Lost Wolves 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 Adele Live at the Royal Albert Hall

00:20 01:20 02:05 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:10 07:00 07:10 07:20

Golf: The Masters Medium Medium Sport Today Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today Newsday Close Harry and Toto Lunar Jim Raa Raa the Noisy Lion

07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Dipdap 07:50 Pinky Dinky Doo 08:00 Roar 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:45 Eliot Kid 08:55 Newsround 09:00 Bear Behaving Badly 09:20 Shaun the Sheep 09:30 Alphablocks 09:35 Abadas 09:45 Numtums 09:50 Little Charley Bear 10:00 Buzz and Tell 10:05 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:20 Driver Dan's Story Train 10:30 Chuggington: Badge Quest 10:35 Small Potatoes 10:40 Andy's Wild Adventures 10:55 Tree Fu Tom 11:20 Zingzillas Zingbop 11:25 Louie 11:35 64 Zoo Lane 11:45 Waybuloo 12:05 In the Night Garden 12:35 Sinbad the Sailor 14:30 Animal Park 15:15 To Buy or Not to Buy 16:00 Helicopter Heroes 16:45 Flog It! 17:30 Breakaway 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Just a Minute 19:30 Eggheads 20:00 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 21:00 Natural World 22:00 White Heat 23:00 The Sarah Millican Television Programme 23:30 Weather 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 Road Warriors 01:30 The Zone 03:35 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Loose Women 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 60 Minute Makeover 16:00 Midsomer Murders 17:59 Meridian Weather 18:00 The Chase 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Fraud Squad 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Take Me Out

ONE BORN EVERY MINUTE Three couples who have featured on the programme share their experiences of parenthood 12 months after they originally took part. A woman explains why it will not be easy for her partner to cope with looking after their child when she returns to work, and another couple voice their concerns about the effect that starting a family has had on their health. Meanwhile, Lucy seeks her husband's approval as she decides to resume her career as an opera singer.

00:30 Hit the Road Jack 01:15 Random Acts 01:20 Mercury Prize Sessions 01:35 Lostprophets: London Live 02:10 Black Cab Sessions 02:35 The Album Chart Show: Spotlight 02:50 4Play 03:05 4Play: Graham Coxon 03:15 Ibiza Rocks 03:45 Live from Abbey Road 04:30 Life of Rhyme 05:25 Lula Fantastic 05:30 Love Tube 05:35 Fast Spin Fling 05:45 Privileged 06:25 Countdown 07:10 The Treacle People 07:20 The Hoobs 08:15 Freshly Squeezed 08:40 According to Jim 09:35 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:05 Frasier 11:00 The Big Bang Theory 12:00 The Secret Millionaire USA 13:00 Channel 4 News Summary 13:05 The Fabulous Baker Brothers 13:35 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 13:45 Air Force 16:10 Countdown 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 18:30 Four in a Bed 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:55 4thought.tv 21:00 Get Your House in Order 22:00 One Born Every Minute 23:00 Death Row 23:55 Random Acts

00:00 Law & Order: Special Victims Unit 00:55 Poker: The Big Game 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 House Doctor 05:25 Wildlife SOS 05:45 Wildlife SOS 06:10 HouseBusters 06:35 HouseBusters 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:35 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Castle Farm 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Noddy in Toyland 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Olivia 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 LIVE with Gabby 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Charley Boorman's Extreme Frontiers 14:15 Home and Away 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Murder without Conviction 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Home and Away 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Holiday Heaven on Earth 20:25 Ultimate Police Interceptors 20:55 Live UEFA Europa League Football 23:00 The Glimmer Man

43

Friday, March 30, 2012

INSURANCE

AWNINGS

ACCOMMODATION Small, economic family run hotel, situated on the CV951, San Miguel de Salinas.

Modern air-conditioned and ensuite rooms available, 35€ per room, per night. Call 966 842 070 for reservations.

ACCOUNTANTS Are you running a business?

Let us simplify things for you – accountancy, taxes, payroll services and more. We cater for companies and individuals.

Established in 1984 on the Costa Blanca. Call us on 966 923 963 for your first consultation free of charge.

CHURCH SERVICES International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja.

Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier.

Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm.

Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276.

Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3.

Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer. Home groups meet during the week.

All welcome from any church

AIR CONDITIONING

background or none. For further information contact Pilar ChristianCommunity Church@gmail.com or contact Reverend Eddie on 966 7693 00 or 650 509 606. Reg No:2009-SG/A

CARS FOR SALE Try Professional Business Support for your quick quote for car insurance. Excellent prices for expats, all policies available in English or German. We will call you back with a price. 966 923 963 Caravan for Sale. Spanish registered, fully legal, Adria Altea 2004. V.G. Condition.

Sleeps 4. Stabilizer. ITV Nov. 2013. Can deliver. €3750 o.n.o. Phone 965 707 981 or 676 906 788 Can email photos and more details Citroen C2 1.4 HDI Auto triptronic VTR 3dr, July 2007, 1 owner, 49,000 kms, FSH,alloys, front fogs, rain/light sensor, metallic silver with snazzy black & blue interior 6950 euros Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Peugeot 206 1.4 HDI 5 dr x line, 2 owners, 94,000 kms, fully serviced, air con,cd etc, dark metallic grey lovely condition 5950 euros Tel 600 726 221 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Going home? We have good selection of RHD vehicles FOR SALE or EXCHANGE Tel 600 726 221 - 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com

FOR SALE SAGOR 50 Litre electric water heater, as new. 75.00 euros O.N.O Tel: 966 712 752 / 618 354 793 (58)

For all your insurance needs, ie.home, car, health, funeral, travel, etc Excellent cover from Spain´s 5th biggest insurance company, “CASER”. Policies available in English and German. Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from a real person/our friendly staff.

MEDICAL Make the most of private health care and private hospitals, we have great cover and a two tier pricing system to suit your age and pocket. All policies in English, many English speaking doctors or free translators at your service. Call us now on 966 923 963, and we will call you back with your quote. Caser Health Care .

PROPERTY MANAGEMENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 TipTop Villa Care, for all your property needs. Meet and Greets. Cleaning. Holiday and Long Term Rentals.

Advertising. Baby Equipment Hire. www.tiptopvillacare.com

e-mail linda@tiptopvillacare .com Tel 667848582 (60)

LONG TERM RENTALS WANTED Los Alcazares, San Javier, Furnished/unfurnished, 3 bedroom houses for long term rental, immediate tenants waiting. Call Linda 968566011 Mob. 667848582 Linda@tiptopvillacare.co.uk Santiago de la Ribera, 3 bedroom house, larger than average, south facing, UK TV and internet available.

Near Wednesday market and beach, Tel Linda 667848582 ROLDAN LARGE DETACHED VILLA opposite parkland. Near to town centre and schools. Ideal for La Torre Golf Resort and Kings College. linda@tiptopvillacare.com or call Tel 667848582 www.tiptopvillacare.com (60)

PROPERTY FOR RENT

Salinas.

Floor heating, Elevator, Roof terrace with swimmingpool, from 385 euros/month Also holiday rentals and appartments in San Miguel de Salinas from 350 euros/month. 966 723 437 and 616 487 493 (60) Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea.

Short or long term rental available. €300PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

HOT TUBS/SPAS

FORMENTERA de la SEGURA. NEAR ROJALES. Sunny and Bright 2 bedroom apartment. Large Terrace with BBQ. Walking distance to Town Centre 350€/mth* Linda 667848582 (60) Luxury appartments, 2/3 bedrooms in San Miguel De

DRAINAGE

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44

Friday, March 30, 2012

Ref: 708, A lovely two bedroom, one bathroom corner ground floor apartment in Algorfa, with a spacious patio & Residents off road parking.

Communal pool near by. Short or long term rental available. €400PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 117, A Lovely 3 Bedroomed 1st floor apartment on the outskirts of Torrevieja (Mar Azul). The Apartment is in walking distance of the excellent beaches and a good selection of restaurants, shops and bars. €425PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, Well situated studio apartment in San Luis. The property has a balcony which

has been glazed to create another room. Close to all shops and amenities, on a local bus route & 10 minutes from the beach. €250PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref. 702, A lovely 2 bedroom apartment in a quiet area of Torrevieja yet within walking distance to local beaches and amenities. It’s also less than an hour’s drive from both Alicante and Murcia San Javier Airports. €400PCM Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE

HEADLAMPS

Excellent cover for your house and home, includes travel assistance for when you go away. Interesting prices for expats; policies available in English or German. Call 966 923 963 for a quote REDUCED Ground floor Duplex in Puerto Marino,

Gran Alacant. Now only 99,500 euros. 2 bed, 1 bath, fully furnished Central heating, glazed galleria, grills, Mozzie nets, front garden, com pools, Private gated parking, walking distance to Shops bars restaurants etc.

627 711 155 Calling all serious Buyers. I have a 5 bed, 4 bath, 2 kitchens, 2 lounges, detached Villa with self-filling pool in Gran Alacant. Everything included in price, fantastic Alicante /sea views. As a starting price I am looking in the region of 265.000 euros Interested in making me an

offer call me on 680 333 242 Mid Terraced Town house in Gran Alacant 2 Bed, 3 Bath, being sold fully furnished.

Electrical Appliances included, large front and rear garden, choice of communal pools, Private secure parking and walking distance to GA Center. 140.000 euros ono.

Call 627 711 155 for viewing.

Lovely well maintained terraced property situated in Mediterranea III in Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, everything included in price. Large communal pool, tennis courts, estab-

FANCY DRESS

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PLASTERER

DAMP PROOFING

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FISHING

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ELECTRICIAN

lished gardens Walking distance to shops, bars restaurants. Very quiet location, over looks nature reserve.

Private parking, call 680 333 242 for more details. 133.000 euros Beach Front property opposite Carabassi Beach 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge diner, roof top solarium under ground secure parking, walking distance to beach Situated on local tram and bus route.

Being sold fully furnished. 4 communal pools, tennis courts, bar and restaurant with in urbanisation Please

NEWS AGENTS

RAG AND BONE MAN

PETS

SECURITY PLUMBERS

LOCKSMITH

SEWING

45

Friday, March 30, 2012 ring 966 699 136 after 6pm (english & spanish spoken) Now only 125.000 euros excellent value in Gran Alacant.

Quick sale needed. 199.000 euros ono Detached property in Puerto Marina. 3 Bed, 3 Bath, Immaculately furnished Alarmed, Central heating, Log fire, Hot & Cold air con, open fields to the rear, Private parking, Communal pools.

966.699.478 after 5 pm.

Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant

SITUATION VACANT

209,000 euros 3 Double bedrooms with fitted wardrobes 2 bathrooms, spacious kitchen with galleria Lounge complete with chimney, large under build, top quality furniture and appliances inc. Com pools, underground garage, tennis courts To view call 627 711 155 Semi-detached villa in Gran Alacant 3 bed, 3 bath, lounge diner, independent kitchen, glazed in porch, large solarium with stunning views, Private Parking.

A/Con Central heating, UK TV. Only 229.000 euros By appointment only call 966 699 136 Large detached villa, large pool with electronic solar cover, converted under build, roof top solarium with conser-

STORAGE

vatory, panoramic views 545 m2 plot, part furnished, double glazed, A/con, alarmed, gas fire, est. irrigated gardens Call 680 333 242 for best price Ref 30 Close to Supavalue in Gran Alacant. Detached villa with pool on 640m2 plot. 3 bed, 2 bath, lounge diner, large roof top solarium, Porch, Outside WC, 2 built-in BBQ’s, Log Fire, Under build, Alarmed, Mature Gardens, Toldos blinds, Garage, Electronic Gates. 260.000 euros 627 711 155 English & Spanish spoken.

Balsares, terraced 4 bedroomed house, 3 bathrooms, large underbuild, private underground parking direct to

house, small gated urbanisation, directly over looking proposed new golf course opposite Gran Alacant, priced for quick sale at original off plan price 195.000 Tel 680 333 242 Gran Alacant, front line, 2 bed, 1 bath, downstairs toilet, fully furnished, roof terrace, walking distance to beaches, large communal and resturants, beach front property priced for quick sale 125,000 Tel 680 333 242 Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain.

Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com

SKY TV

WIG SPECIALIST

www.mrskytv.com SKY boxes, Dish realignments and problem solving (see our main advert in TV section) call 965 070 458 or 618585051

SALON MARGARETHAS, 23 years in Torrevieja Hair/Wig specialist for Medical illness and Hair Loss problems. We offer different Hair Replacements, top fillers, Hair prostheses, Toupees and Wigs, Natural and Artificial hair and much more. Also fashion/festival accessories TV/TS are welcome to our service. Please call our salon reception for an appointment with Margaretha on Tel no 966 921 846 Torrevieja (61)

SOLICITORS Need English Speaking Solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, accident claims, legalise land. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor.

SIGN WRITING

RECYCLING CLOTHES

SURVEYS WANTED SPANISH LESSONS

MASSAGE

REMOVALS

PAVING

PERSONAL

WATER FILTERS

SWIMMING POOL CLEANING

Recovery & Breakdown Services

46

Friday, March 30, 2012

Greenside Gossip IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

WHO IS GOLF’S BEST BALL STRIKER EVER? INSTANT POWER TIPS FOR LONG DRIVING ASK yourself why you play golf? Ask yourself which shots you talk about in the 19th? It’s not the lay up on the 5th. It’s not that chip to 6 inches on the 9th.

No! It’s the 300-yard drive that carried the corner and left you a wedge in.

We all love a big hit – yes it’s the reason we play.

WHERE DOES POWER COME FROM? The source of power is simple. The faster your club head is travelling as it makes contact with the ball – the further the ball will travel. Increase that magical club head speed will increase the power off the tee.

The following tips, hints and advice should help to crank up that all important club head speed.

PRE-FLIGHT CHECK Shorter drives, like many problems in the golf swing, can originate from faulty basics. Here are two tips that

you should pay attention to, particularly if you are losing yards off the tee.

THE GRIP As soon as you decide to unleash a big one, the first thing you tend to do is grip the club tighter. Strangling the club actually decreases the chances of hitting a big drive as it tenses up your muscles, making them more rigid and less fluid. Relax your grip and you will relax your muscles so that they will work quicker and more powerfully.

THE STANCE When you make a powerful swing, you want to hit the ball in the “up” part of the swing to launch it into orbit.

Taking an address position that mirrors the point of impact, you increase your chances of making a powerful strike.

Angle your spine away from the target at address, so that it is behind the ball. This will make your right shoulder sit lower than your left – most touring pros create a 30-degree angle between their left and right shoulder.

ASKED the above question, most people would say Tiger Woods, a few John Daly or maybe Seve Ballesteros. And Australians might go for Greg Norman.

But THE best was actually another Norman whose name not many in the golfing world will come up.

I’m talking about Moe Norman.

The Canadian legend was said to be the ‘Rainman of Golf - slightly autistic, he repeated his words often. One has to think maybe that's why his golf swing was so repetitious – though there has never been a more colourful character in the game.

Revered by the game’s touring and teaching professionals Almost tee time: Moe Norman alike, he was known for his uncanny ability to hit a golf ball (centre) prepares for action straight EVERY TIME. Moe’s swing was called many things during his lifetime - “weird, unorthodox, different”. But his genius for striking a ball could never be MOE NORMAN was a true philosopher l Positive thinking, Good Golf; bad denied. He scored three 59s of the game and often expressed his thinking, Bad Golf. Believe 100% in your and hit so many holes-in-one feelings and perceptions about his ability. it bored him. unique swing. l Let your clubs do the talking, not Lee Trevino once said: l Full extension “Back” and your mouth. Winners play golf automat“When you talk about Moe “Through”; ically.

Norman, you are talking l My club must never “twist” or l Imagination is the key to success – about a living legend.The “turn” in my swing. be in charge of your thinking. public doesn't know Moe l I play into my legs and employ the l Stop being afraid of yourself and Norman. But you ask any least moving parts. stop being afraid of not doing well. golf professional. l I swing through the ball, not at it l Stop worrying about going when “I think that if someone and I let my swing balance me. you are going to die, but how you will would have taken Moe under l Try “smarter” not “sarder” – learn live. their wing and said ‘look, we to “have to” into “want to”. are going to play here, and AT one exhibition, Moe hit 1,540 don't be afraid’, he would l You are “what you think you are”. drives in just under seven hours. All have won the US Open.

Always be in a good frame of mind. went longer than 225 yards, all landed “ I think he would have won l Winners see what they want; losers inside a marked 30-yard-wide landing all the tournaments around see what they don’t want. zone. NOW THAT’S BALL STRIKING. the world. I mean he is that good.’’ time he and Hogan were on again.

Moe developed his unique But his genius lived on the practice tee together at a swing over more than five and as late as 2004, Vijay pro tournament. Hogan years of trial and error, startSingh, asked in a USA believed any ball hit dead ing at the age of 15, and Today interview “who’s the straight was an accident and enjoyed much success as best golfer you’ve ever after each of the first six, both an amateur and pro.

"Accident." seen?”, answered, “Moe commented, With 17 holes in one, three Norman. I've hit balls with When Moe hit several more scores of 59, four of 61, and him lots of times. He was and Hogan conceded, "Just more than 30 course records, he dominated par-four holes ‘backwards’, incredible. Whatever he said keep hitting those accidents, kid."

Canadian golf through the hitting a wedge off the tee he could do, he could do.

Moe was earning a meaAnd Tiger Woods commid 20th century. and a driver onto the green mented: "Only two players gre living until, in 1995, Unnaturally shy, he and still make par or better. shunned public appearances After a brief stint on the have ever truly owned their Titleist decided to pay him and speaking. His shyness US PGA tour, these antics swings - Moe Norman and $5,000 per month for his only disappeared while he earned him a ‘dressing Ben Hogan. I want to own unique contribution to the held a golf club in his hands. down’ by some members of mine. That's where the satis- game. He passed away During tournaments, Moe the tour, and he left, never to faction comes from".

September 4, 2004 at the would hit drives off of six-inch play in the US competitively There are hundreds of age of 75. tees, soda bottles and play stories about Moe , like the

THE MOE NORMAN WAY

TITTER ON THE TEE BILL arrives at work speaking in a hoarse tone. His friend asks him what happened to his voice.

“Well,’’ he croaks, “I was playing golf and sliced his ball out of bounds and into a pasture.

“However, I thought I could find his ball and went to look for it.

In the field, I saw a woman looking for her ball, too.

“As I passed one of the cows, I noticed that there was a golf ball

stuck in it’s rear end.

“So I lifted up the cow's tail andcalled out,’Excuse me madam, does this look like yours?’

“That's when she hit me in the throat with a three-iron’’.

47

Friday, March 30, 2012

SPOT ‘No THE DIFFERENCE penalty’ ref may have

REFEREE Michael Oliver and his assistants did Manchester United no favours by ruling out Fulham's late penalty claims at Old Trafford on Monday night.

If United don’t win the Premier League by more than two points, those football followers from all over the world who love to hate United - and principally the Manchester City fans - will forever claim Fergie’s men took the title by default.

The truth is it should not have mattered as United passed up the chance to bury Fulham long before Michael Carrick's innocuous challenge on Danny Murphy. There was contact, though, and it WAS a penalty.

Football folk are forever saying these things even themselves out but how can winning a Premier League title by default ever even itself out? I pray, therefore, that United get the victories they need to win it by a clear margin of four or five points - and I think the key to it all is City's game against Arsenal at the Emirates on Sunday week.

Much has been made of the Manchester clubs’ run-ins, most people saying City have the harder task. In fact, the Arsenal fixture is the only one where they could stumble - apart from the United derby, that is. The rest of the games for both clubs are much of a muchness, so if City fail at Arsenal, the pressure is on them for the rest of the month prior to that showdown with United.

The whole thing is in danger of being slightly overshadowed by what is going on at Liverpool, whose last two results heralded calls for Kenny Dalglish to be removed from the manager's chair.

Dalglish has met it all quite

clear favourites for a win.

Swansea face a strong test at Tottenham.

The way Brendan Rodgers has got the Welsh side playing has won them plaudits from everyone. There was a slight hiccup at home to Everton last weekend, which will make it increasingly difficult to bounce back against a team going hard for a third-place finish.

Everton will take heart from that win at the Liberty Stadium after failing to match Arsenal at Goodison in their previous fixture - and allowing the Gunners to hold on to a 1-0 lead for 82 minutes. West Brom will provide tough opposition but I take David Moyes’ men to win that one.

In the other games I take Fulham to beat Norwich, Bolton to overcome Wolves and Wigan to carry the euphoria of that win at Anfield over into their home game with Stoke and chalk up another vital victory.

handed the title to United philosophically by saying he is trying one or two younger players with a view to the future. That is more or less conceding any hopes of a top-four finish and a Champions League spot - and merely adds fuel to the fans’ fire or ire at not competing for the title and Europe any more this season.

A League Cup trophy and even the addition of the FA Cup after a semi-final win over arch-rivals Everton will not appease them - and it’s looking like tough times for King Kenny if he is to retain the job at Anfield.

In the Premier League this weekend, City should overcome Sunderland at the Etihad and it will be interesting to see if Alan Hansen's prediction that Mario Balotelli will not start another City game this season comes to fruition. I think he may be proved wrong and would not be surprised to see the volatile Italian on the Stadium of Light pitch at kick-off time, in fact.

United have the chance to avenge Blackburn's shock win at Old Trafford on New Year's Eve and put the brakes on Rovers’ current attempts to escape the relegation zone.

Coming on the back of that emotion-charged defeat at Bolton, another setback would plunge them right back into it just when they were showing signs of escaping.

Liverpool must go to Newcastle and unless they improve dramatically I can't see anything for the visitors there. Aston Villa must get a win from somewhere and Chelsea's run of great form can't go on forever - so that will be an interesting one . So, too, will virtually all the other fixtures with only Arsenal , who visit QPR, looking like

Alvaro plays an ace - but Murcia come up trumps ITV Orihuela RFC 11pts XV Murcia 26pts THEY didn’t win - but the ITV Orihuela players can feel proud of themselves after just missing out on a losing bonus point against league leaders XV Murcia in an excellent and entertaining game of rugby.

The match started off at a cracking pace with Orihuela

holding their own against a far heavier and more physical scrum. And Orihuela took the lead with an Alvaro penalty – only for Murcia to hit back soon afterwards with the first of their tries following a rolling maul from the lineout.

Not to be outdone,

Orihuela showed what they could do from their own 22 with Alvaro cutting through the Murcia defence and chipping over the fullback to win the race for the try. That brilliant solo effort put the home team 8-7 up…only for Murcia to go on another rolling maul and go in 14-8 up at half time.

From open play the Orihuela defence had held firm during the first period and also looked dangerous on the attack, causing the opposition problems.

The second half started very much the same as the first with Orihuela adding another penalty goal to bring them to within three points of the opposition.

Murcia tried every way they could to break down the home side’s stubborn defence without success so they resorted to the fivemetre lineout out and rolling maul, which brought two more tries and a 26-11 victory.

The Orihuela juveniles

could only muster 14 players, so in the spirit of the game XV Murcia loaned them a player. But by the end of the first half, Orihuela had lost two more players due to injury – and the superior numbers eventually took their toll.

Murcia led 22-5 at half time and although Orihuela put up a brave fight and scored two more tries, they eventually went down 45-15 to a better team on the day.

The rugby bar at Rojales Steakhouse will be showing the Rabodirect and Aviva live matches all weekend.

Raffle tickets will also be on sale to win two tickets for the Heineken Cup Final, plus return flights and two nights in a four-star hotel.

This coming weekend is the last one of the season in the league, with the Orihuela juveniles and seniors both playing away at UCAM Murcia.

Further information on all things rugby from Garry on 692 767 242

FIVE SEE RED ON CALLOSA CRAZY DAY Callosa ‘B’ 4 CD Montesinos 4

THIS match has to go down as one of the craziest games ever. The scoreline was the least of the action, which saw FIVE players red carded, plus the Monte manager, two penalties, eight goals and not a bad tackle made throughout the 90 minutes!

Montesinos came into this game in top spot but knowing that a slip up of any kind would let in those chasing them - and as only the champions are automatically promoted, it was vital to keep winning.

However, cheered on by their travelling fans, they did not make a good start, and after 30 minutes were already 2-0 and a player down.

Callosa took the lead with an effort that went in off the woodwork on 25 minutes. Five minutes later, a poor bounce on the edge of their box hit Monte centre half Becker on the hand. The referee issued Becker, somewhat harshly, with a red card, and awarded Callosa a free kick – from which they scored again.

Juanpe made changes at half time and started with a three-man defence. His bravery was rewarded as first Vazquinho pulled a goal back, and then Andres equalised with a free kick from all of 30 yards.

Montesinos piled on the pressure, only for Callosa to break away and hit the bar from a cross. The rebound was smashed back by a Callosa forward only for Dimitry to make a

superb save on the line.

Unfortunately for Montesinos, Dimitry is a defender, not a goalkeeper, so he saw red and Callosa went 3-2 up from the ensuing penalty.

Worse was to follow as, from the very next breakaway, the home side increased their lead - but not before Montesinos had their third player, keeper Lopez, sent off for handling outside the box.

Reduced to eight men and 4-2 behind away from home, most sides would have settled for a damage limitation exercise. But not CD Montesinos.

With just three minutes left on the clock, a Callosa defender handled and Monte were awarded a penalty, from which Andres made it 4-3. The offending player duly joined the red-carded brigade.4-3.

Then, astonishingly, with the last kick of the game, Vazquinho rounded his marker and cracked an equaliser into the bottom corner of the net to send the Monte players and their supporters into frenzy.

This Sunday, CD Montesinos entertain local rivals Racing San Miguel. The game will be played at the Campo Municipal de Futbol in Los Montesinos, with a 5pm kick-off. For additional, go to the website www.cdmontesinos. com, email thefullmonte2011@hotmail.com or telephone 637 869 602.

In association with CajaMurcia

Friday, March 30, 2012

48

NO MESSI-AH!

But it’s still the Lionel flair show LIONEL Messi IS just a mere mortal. That was proved on Wednesday night as the Argentinian ace was no more than workmanlike against AC Milan at the San Siro.

The TV commentator's voice still rose several octaves whenever Messi came anywhere near the ball, but the little man did very little, as Barcelona did enough to put themselves firmly in control of the two-legged Champions League quarter-final tie.

They should progress at the expense of my favourite European team, AC, as the Catalan team have home advantage at the Nou Camp, but don't rule the Rossoneri out just yet. Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Pato and the rest may still have the FINAL say.

Bayern Munich stand in the way of an all-Spanish final in Munich in May and the Germans did their chances of appearing in that final in their own stadium a power of good with a 2-0 first-leg win at Marseille.

STEVE BOTT reports

Real Madrid marched on with a thumping 3-0 victory in Nicosia against Apoel and Chelsea kept the English flag flying high by beating Benfica 1-0 in their own Lisbon backyard.

So my pre-season bet on Bayern at odds of 8-1 is still looking good - and they will give Real a big test in the semi-final and hopefully come through to beat Barca in the final.

No sign of any flying pink objects so I will stick with that and get back to Mr Messi. I was harangued on a public service vehicle - a bus to you, mate - the other night as I listened to a bunch of Preston fans whose ages ranged from 16 to 76. They were homeward bound after watching Knob End get tatered 3-1 at home to Brentford. They were haranguing poor Preston with more venom than a lorry load of cobras when one elderly gent had the temerity to suggest that Wayne Rooney is not better than Messi!

Now, while not disagreeing with that observation, I defended Mr Rooney strongly by stating that he was a world-class player and would continue to prove that as time went on. No, the old timer said. Rooney is not world class. I bit my lip and silently thought 'Well, the

THE FINAL COUNTDOWN: Barca’s Lionel Messi (left) and Milan’s Zlatan Ibrahimovic both have their sights on Champions League glory

Roonster would have no trouble passing a Preston world-class test, would he?'

Tom Finney is coming up to 90 and a week on Saturday Preston celebrate that at their home game with MK Dons. Now I will risk a tirade of abuse and worse, as I live on Preston's doorstep, by stating Finney was nowhere near as good as Rooney. He was a winger and that's it while Rooney will go on to be a marvellously creative and dominant midfield player after scoring lots more goals as a striker for Manchester United and England.

As it happens, I am off to watch Preston this Saturday as they take on another of the English game's former greats, Sheffield Wednesday. It’s always a pleasure visiting Hillsborough as a Press man, for while Wednesday may not be in the Premier League, their ground and staff are still top class and the facilities superb. I just hope the game comes somewhere near matching all that but I won't hold my breath!

Any Preston or Wednesday fans should watch out for next week's Courier for a bit of lowdown on this low-down encounter.