The Courier Week 79 by TKO UK

Edition 79

www.thecourier.es

Friday, August 24, 2012

Our latest edition is always online at www.thecourier.es By DONNA GEE A TEENAGE holidaymaker’s dream night out ended in tragedy on Monday when he was killed in a freak accident as he cycled home along the N332.

BIKE RIDE TO DEATH

Jake Benton, 17, had just enjoyed what friends described as ‘’the best night of his life’’ and was heading back from Alicante when he took a wrong turning. His two companions said he fell just a few feet down an embankment on to concrete, hitting his head and dying instantly in a “one in a million” accident. Jake, a promising footballer, was on holiday with his mother, Jacqui, and twin sister Cara and had been enjoying a festival in with his cousin Luke and a friend. Said Jacqui: “Jake was an amazing twin brother to Cara and younger brother to Lewis. “He was a beautiful, loving and caring son and did not ask for much out of life. It is so devastating that his life ended so soon in such a tragic way. He will live forever tragedy was compounded by in our hearts.” the fact Jake and twin Cara His aunt, Diane MacIntyre, 49, said: “He was just having were due to be celebrating fun and had been to a festi- their 18th birthdays next val. Luke told me Jake had month. “Now we will be mourning said it had been the best his death rather than celenight of his life.” Diane said Monday’s brating his birth,” she said.

Jake, 17, killed in freak tumble Jake’s aunt added: “He was the most beautiful, amazing nephew who brought joy to all the family. I never heard him be nasty or utter a critical word to anyone.” She said that Jake had

gone to the festival near Alicante with Luke and a friend. “Luke and Jake were very close. They were cycling home when Jake took a wrong turn and went over the embankment. It was a one-

in-a-million thing. “We think he died instantly, but it is some comfort to know he was with Luke at the time. Luke said he held Jake until the ambulance arrived. “It is so difficult for all the family. It is the worst thing that can happen to you as a parent..” Jake, from Longstanton, near Cambridge, was a talented footballer and a keen tennis player for Longstanton Tennis Club. The Chelsea fan was training to be a mechanic

Jake Benton

€1,000 fine stuns folk bar

Frank and Phil - their music proved so costly

GUARDAMAR authorities have slapped a whopping 1,000-euro fine on a struggling bar boss – for providing gentle music for his customers. And some locals are so sympathetic to Graham Lilley’s plight that one customer thrust 30 euros into his hand and insisted he puts it towards the fine. “It is really touching that people are so supportive,’’ said Lilley, who runs Ricardo’s Bar at El Raso.

Graham insists he had no idea he required a special licence for Anglo-Irish folk duo Frank and Phil to stage a free singalong evening at Ricardo’s, which was virtually inaudible to anyone outside the bar. But police were obliged to investigate when someone in a rival bar made a complaint. “The police said themselves that they could hear nothing until they actually came into the bar,’’ Graham added. “But they had to investigate

because there had been a complaint. My accountant has been trying to negotiate a settlement with the Ayuntamiento and I was under the impression the fine would be reduced or cancelled. “But last week the police walked in with an official document saying I have to pay 1000 euros.’’ Last night, Guardamar Ayuntamiento spokesman

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Friday, August 24, 2012

Get my goat up and I'll give you a good licking TELEPHONE

96 692 1003 679 096 309 96 692 1003 E-MAIL office@thecourier.es WEB www.thecourier.es HEAD OFFICE Calle Luis Canovas Martinez 1. Urb Aguas Nuevas, Torrevieja 03183, ALICANTE PHONE: 96 692 1003 Email: office@thecourier.es OPENING HOURS Mon - Fri 1030 to 1730 EDITOR Donna Gee ADVERTISING SALES 966 921 003 office@thecourier.es TELESALES 966 921 003 679 096 309 Sally Los Alcazares, San Javier 618 391 491 Myra Quesada, Rojales, Torrevieja, San Miguel Tel. 618 583 765 Jean La Zenia, Playa Flamenca, Cabo Roig Tel. 618 898 034 Patrick International Rep 5 Languages Tel 685 901 265 Writers Donna Gee Amanda Black Sally Bengtsson Rebecca Marks Jeanette Erath Alex Trelinski Dave Silver Steve Bott Tony Mayes Jake Monroe

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Picture of the Week

JUNGLE DRUMS

A BERK OF ART By AMANDA BLACK AN elderly woman has destroyed a 19th century fresco with a spot of DIY restoration. The octogenarian busybody thought the precious painting in a church near her home in Borja, Zaragoza province, was looking a little worn. So she decided to get out her paintbrush and fix it up. Her disastrous attempt ruined the fresco Ecce Homo, the only known example by painter Elias Garcia Martinez. Catalogue photos show the work had almost no damage in 2010. But by July this year, mysterious white patches had appeared, now thought to have been caused by the woman

Old lady’s DIY botch-up paints picture of disaster preparing her surface. But it was when cataloguers returned this month that they got the real shock. The delicate image of Jesus wearing a crown of thorns had been replaced by a clumsy, childlike daubing, more reminiscent of Picasso than a 19th century religious painter. Culture councillor Juan Maria de Ojeda said the woman had undertaken the project “with good intentions,” but added “it got out of hand”.úó

From left, Elias Garcia Martinez’s original 19th century fresco, as it looked during the time it was being prepared - and the final project

‘Police had advised bar about music licence’ From Page One

Publication Published by Rainbow Media, S.L. Printed by Localprint S.L Depósito legal A - 132 - 2011 The Courier, its publishers, members of staff and its agents do not accept responsibility for claims by advertisers nor can it be held responsible for any errors in advertisements which are reproduced from poor artwork, low quality electronic data or inadequate instructions for text or other layout features. Further no responsibility is accepted for any loss or damage caused by an error, inaccuracy or non-appearance of any advertisement, although all advertisements produced are checked prior to insertion. We regret that we cannot accept responsibility for more than ONE incorrect insertion and that no re-publication will be granted in the case of typographical or minor changes which do not affect the value of the advertisement. E&OE. NO PART OF THIS NEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENT OF THE PUBLISHERS.

Francisco Lorenzo issued a statement saying: “In September 2011 the police went to Ricardo’s Restaurant and told them that to play live music they would need

a licence. “On two or three occasions after that, they advised them again. Then a neighbour denounced them and the police presented them with an official ‘denuncia’.

Friday Sunny High 33° Low 25° Chance of rain 0% Monday Showers High 29° Low 20° Chance of rain 6%

Tuesday Sunny High 30° Low 22° Chance of rain 0%

“Once the process has started the said person has the opportunity (15 days) to appeal the sanction of 1000€, and they didn't do it. “The case therefore ran its course and now the amount is to be claimed.’’

Saturday Sunny High 32° Low 23° Chance of rain 0%

Sunday Sunny High 32° Lo 24° Chance of rain 0%

Wednesday Thunder storms High 29° Low 21° Chance of rain 60%

Thursday Sunny High 27° Lo 19° Chance of rain 0%

Friday, August 24, 2012

Missing kids ‘being cared for’ JOSÉ BRETÓN, father of two missing Córdoba children, has hinted in private correspondence that six-year-old Ruth and José, two, are being 'cared for' by someone whose name has not been revealed. Bretón is in custody and is the only suspect to date in connection with the kids' disappearance from a park in Córdoba last year during his weekend access. There were no

witnesses to what happened. Their mother, Ruth, has always been convinced her ex-husband knew where their children were and whether they were dead or alive. A letter sent by Bretón to the Diario de Córdoba newspaper was said to have been written as though from Ruth to her paternal grandmother and claimed that the people 'looking after' her and her little brother 'wanted to talk to daddy'. It

appealed, on this basis, for his release from jail. Bretón has previously sent two letters to the newspaper for publication, in one of which he said he considered his ex-wife, Ruth Ortiz, to be a 'key witness'. He also criticised the provincial government MP for having stopped the search for the kids for the summer, although this accusation was denied yesterday by the MP.

MENACE OF THE PURSE PINCHERS

Thieves cash in as Pauline pays for being kind By AMANDA BLACK

CALLOUS pickpockets played on their victim’s good nature to snatch a purse out of her bag in a San Miguel supermarket. Pauline Thurlow, 74, was shopping in Mas y Mas last Friday morning when her purse was lifted as she helped a male shopper who turned out to be a decoy. Now Pauline wants to warn others of the cruel trick that was played on her and thank staff at the supermarket for their fantastic support. “A chap came up to me and asked me to reach a bottle off the top shelf as he had his hands full,” Pauline told me. “As I did, his accomplice must have taken my purse.” She noticed nothing at the time, but when she discovered her purse missing, she realised what had happened and later remembered glimpsing a young woman behind her .

Perfect target: Pauline was shopping alone in an empty aisle A shaken Pauline reported the theft to supermarket staff, who she says “could not have been more helpful”. She added: “I have read so many stories in the papers where this kind of thing has happened to people and the supermarket staff don’t want to know. But in my case the store was absolutely brilliant. “A young man on the till spoke very good English and stayed with me all the time. He came to the police station and helped me make a denuncia.

RISING DUMP By SALLY BENGTSSON THE socialist party of San Pedro del Pinatar have made an official complaint about the lack of hygiene in the streets of San Pedro and Lo Pagan. “The appearance of the area is dirty and this is putting tourists off,’’ they insist, claiming the change in the refuse collection company has had a negative effect. The bins are all overflowing, the streets are becoming covered in litter, and rats and insects are multiplying rapidly in the area, due to the accumulation of waste. This is not to mention the pungent aromas which are filling the town. In the last plenary session the complaint was made to the Mayoress, but the ruling PP party

denied there was any problem, saying the refuse collection services are working perfectly. The Mayoress asked residents to be tolerant and to remember that the population of the town triples in the summer months.

They could not have done more.” Pauline says she was probably a perfect target for the thieves as she was shopping alone and in an empty aisle when they struck. It was made all the worse because Pauline, who doesn’t usually carry much cash, was on her way to the opticians to buy new glasses so had €350 in her purse. But police are studying CCTV footage from the store and have told Pauline they believe the pickpockets are local and that there is a good chance they will recover the money. Pauline hopes they are right, but if nothing else wants people to be warned by her experience, take extra care and leave helping fellow customers to staff.

Legal weed worth €86.9m to Spain

SPANIARDS spend around 1,163 million euros a year on cannabis, according to marihuana users associations. Although regular cannabis smokers only account for 2% of the population, they spend around €100 a month on the drug. Users say that if the drug could be sold legally - meaning it could be taxed - it would generate millions for the State. Based upon current figures, Spain would net an extra €86.9 million in taxes. Instead, money generated from cannabis lands in the hands of mafiastyle drug-dealers and the criminal underworld, the user associations say. Research has shown that regular use of cannabis can permanently affect the brain. Marihuana can cause depression, memory loss and dull reactions, as well as generally limiting mental capacity.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Ryanair hit back in fuel controversy

O’LEARY: WE ARE BEING VICTIMISED By PAUL RAVEN Budget airline Ryanair are still courting controversy over their planes making emergency landings due to a lack of fuel, this time claiming that the Spanish airports authority are victimising them. The budget airline insist they were not the only airline that had forced landings on July 26 – yet they are the only ones facing an investigation and court proceedings. In an interview with the Irish Independent, airline boss Michael O´Leary said, "It's the silly season and the Olympics are over so let's talk and write a lot of shite about Ryanair planes running out of fuel". The investigation surrounds three Ryanair jets that made emergency landings at Valencia, after they had been diverted from Madrid due to storms. The three aircraft then each declared an emergency and were given priority to land at the airport. The “Mayday” call was due to them each having a lack of fuel, but the airline claimed that the aircraft had simply got the mandatory minimum and the pilots were following procedure. The company is also being criticised over fuel allocations for each flight and some pilot´s unions are complaining that they are operating unsafe practises, as any additional fuel has to be requested in writing by the pilots.

The latest claim of victimisation came after Ryanair discovered that two other aircraft from different airlines also made emergency landings on the same day, so they consider it unfair that only Ryanair are facing an enquiry and court case. The airport management company, AENA, confirmed that both a LAN Chile and Easyjet plane did make emergency landings too, but the LAN Chile flight had declared an emergency due to, “technical problems”, not lack of fuel. Their spokesperson also went on to confirm that "the only thing for sure is that three Ryanair planes had problems". Passenger confidence in Ryanair seems to be suffering, though. This week alone, passengers on an aircraft in Valencia have accused the company of “lying” after what the airline called a “minor technical fault” delayed their flight from Valencia to Brussels, from a Boeing 737 aircraft that some passengers claimed they “ran away” from in fear. The 20:30 flight on Tuesday night met with delay, but passengers raised concerns after a fluid which appeared to be “fuel like” was seen squirting from the end of the wings of the aircraft after it had been refuelled. After an inspection and delay, with passengers left with no information, the flight landed at its destination just over two hours late.

Man bites snake in Nepal

A Nepalese farmer who was bitten by a venomous snake took revenge by sinking his teeth into the reptile and killing it, police said on Thursday. MOHAMED SALMO "I could have killed it MIYA was farming near with a stick but I was mad his village 125 miles with anger and wanted to south-east of take revenge. I killed it Kathmandu when he with my teeth." encountered the deadly Nepal has a wide varicommon cobra, district ety of poisonous and nonpolice chief Uma Prasad venomous snakes, which Chatrubedi said. are particularly active "A farmer in Bardanga during the summer monvillage has killed a white soon, including the Indian cobra with his teeth out rock python, which can of anger," he said. "The grow up to 33 feet long, snake bit him while he and the deadly king was working in his paddy cobra. field on Tuesday evening Conservative estimates and the man chased it suggest that there are and killed it." 20,000 cases of snake Miya was treated at a local clinic and is bites in Nepal a year, almost all in the Terai recovering at home. southern plains, causing around 1,000 "I was very angry after the snake bit into deaths. me. Then I followed the snake, grabbed it The six-foot common cobra, which and bit it to death," the 55-year-old told the accounts for the majority of bites, is worNepali-language Annapurna Post. shipped by Hindus in some parts of Nepal.

Friday, August 24, 2012

editor@thecourier.es COURIER POSTBAG: YOUR VIEWS ON OUR NEWS

Ryanair ban equals Spanish suicide

Michael O’Leary

I WAS shocked to read the headline SPAIN BAN THREAT TO RYANAIR on Page One of last week’s Courier.. Whoever in their right senses would carry out such a threat? We are all very much aware Spain is on its financial backside, so a ban on any airline bringing trade to the country would be political suicide. The facts seemed clearly reported and, if believed, three Ryanair flights were diverted due to a thunderstorm and were required to circle Valencia Airport for FIFTY,

SIXTY EIGHT and SIXTY NINE minutes respectively. When fuel reached the minimum safety level the pilots, in accordance with international requirements, requested priority landing. This was presumably granted and all the aircraft landed safely, still with adequate fuel on board. Is it a coincidence that the complaint to the Aviation Safety Agency originated from AENA, the Spanish Airport Authority, who for many months were locked in a dispute with Michael O'Leary when

insisting on the use of air bridges at Alicante Airport, proposing to charge the airline TWO MILLION euros per year for the privilege. This resulted in the airline axing 31 routes from El Altet. Other airlines reduced their flights also. Alicante airport has now shown a drop in passengers and revenue. I can assure you Spain needs Ryanair far more than Ryanair needs Spain. Proceed with caution. IAN BENSON, Los Altos, Orihuela Costa

DANGEROUS DOG OWNERS BEWARE! IF you own a dog that is classed as a dangerous breed, it’s going to cost you a fortune if you don’t have it licenced.

Thank you, Courier! THE K9 Club would like to thank your newspaper for your help in advertising our animals. We have had a lot of interest and have re-homed at least four dogs in the last 10 days because of your involvement and support. Thank you so much. SHEONA LAVISHER, President, The K9 Club

A dog owner in Alicante was fined €2,404 this week even though the animal had never attacked anyone. The fine was for keeping a dangerous dog without a licence - and the town hall says more big fines will follow. The €2,404 figure is actually the LEAST you can be fined - the maximum is €15,000. And a Vega Baja official for the animal welfare group Brigada Azul has just told me that police in many municipal areas are getting tough on this issue. It is estimated that 90% of the 2,000 dogs in the Alicante municipality classed as dangerous are not licenced and the town hall plans to go after all the owners. Many people think that because their dog is not aggressive, they don’t need

a dangerous dog licence. But the police are only interested whether it falls into a dangerous dog breed category. Alicante and other municipalities are checking who owns dangerous dogs by accessing RIVIA, the Valencian animal identification database, which keeps details of all chipped animals. Dogs must be chipped by law. To receive a licence for keeping a dangerous dog, owners must undergo a basic criminal record check

and have a simple medical examination to ensure they are physically and mentally fit. The dogs must wear a muzzle and stay on a lead at all times in public places. Anyone who is not sure whether their dog is classed as dangerous can contact their local police or town hall to check. As well as Pit Bulls, Rottweilers etc, many dogs not normally thought of as dangerous fall into the category because of their weight. DOG LOVER. Torrevieja

LAUGHMAIL OSAMA BIN Laden sent George W Bush a coded message to let him know he was still alive. It read

370H55V 0773H Bush, the FBI and the CIA were baffled so they gave it to MI6. After a few minutes Mi6 sent their reply. “Tell Mr Bush he’s holding the message upside down.’’ PETER REiD, El Raso

Jet2 to San Javier - same again next year BY PAUL RAVEN POPULAR UK based airline Jet 2.com has announced ‘business as usual’ to Murcia next year - confirming to many that the opening of the region’s new airport at Corvera will be further delayed Jet2 are now booking flights to San Javier airport for the summer of 2013, despite previous announcements that

San Javier was to close to passenger traffic. In November 2011, the government announced the closure of San Javier , saying that all passenger flights would move to Corvera, a new in-land site close to the location of the planned Paramount Theme park. Residents, tourists and holiday home owners were

left shocked by the move, as they saw it as the death knell to the area. Jet 2 were one of the first airlines to announce their move, complying with the demands put on them by the airport authority. Earlier this year, retail shops at airports across the country were all put out to tender, including the one at San

Javier, adding fuel to the rumour that the airport would stay open. This latest development seems to confirm an extended lifeline for the coastal base. In the absence of any official statement from the government, it might only be a temporary stay of execution. But at least it gives some breathing space... for now.

Friday, August 24, 2012

IT will be a tearful farewell when I wave goodbye to my family this weekend after their annual summer blowout at my sunshine pad. And, like many expats, I’ll be weeping tears of relief as much a regret that we are about to be separated once more by 1,500 miles of European emptiness. The sobs will come naturally amid the hugs and kisses as the brats head for the UK, along with the life-sized puppets (otherwise known as Mum and Dad) they’ve been manipulating 24/7 since the moment they were born. Many of you will know the sob-smile scenario all too well. Along with the natural emotion at being separated once more from your loved ones comes that wonderful feeling that chaos is about to give way to normality. For me, the departure of my kids and grandkids means I am about to rediscover the art of relaxing, which is exactly what my doctor ordered. Too much stress is also the reason why I am reducing my involve-

RELAX, DAMSEL IN DE-STRESS!

Tears for souvenirs but what relief as the kids go home ment in this newspaper’s production as of next week. In other words, I plan to become a damsel in destress . Meanwhile, my home already resembles a pig sty – even if no self-respecting sow would venture within 100 miles of the place. (OK, I’m telling porkies – the living room’s actually more like the Syrian war zone. My offspring and their families have been coming and

going all summer…peaking this past week with four adults, three children and a quartet of resident cats all trying to make themselves at home in the living room. Much to the delight of my 12-year-old grandson, the cats have also treated us to occasional visits from small lizards, grass snakes and helicopter insects, invariably locked in a feline jaw. But as yet, there’s been no sign of any crocodile tears.

Oh deary, I’m with O’Leary REGULAR Grumpy Gran followers (both of you) will be well aware of my feelings about Ryanair. I hate the way they purport to save you a fortune, yet are forever invoking penny-pinching policies that have passengers fuming. Yet I felt little sympathy for Suzy McLeod, the mum of two who had to pay £236 extra on her already-mammoth flight bill because she forgot to check in online. Now I’ve flown Ryanair just three times, but I am nevertheless well aware that if you arrive at the check-in desk nonline rather than online, you are automatically stung by the greed machine for 60 euros per passenger. Having said that, I suspect stings are not quite so bad for some who don’t check in online. If you’ve got away with it, a let me know. I promise I won’t tell Michael O’Leary (pictured).

Anyway, what irked Ms McLeod as much as having to pay for a party of four, was that the family’s peak time return fares to Alicante and back had already cost her £1650. Now there she has a point. I have just paid well over €500 to send two family members on a one-way ticket to Manchester next week. If they’d been going in January, you can be sure those two seats would have cost 80% less. I don’t need to travel to the UK during school holidays, so can pick and choose the cheapest fare. Meanwhile, mums and dads with school-age kids who have no choice but to travel in July and August are ripped off for a fortune. Fair? I think not. I would happily pay more for a low season ticket if that extra money helped to reduce premium prices in high summer. And such a price structure could work if all the airlines involved were prepared to put their heads together and reach a compromise. But they have no time to do that. Some are too busy churning out those ‘pieces of paper’ at 60 quid a go.

No, they’re not mine, love ‘em... my grandkids would be trying to sell the loungers

Friday, August 24, 2012

Birthday bleatings I'M not telling you how old I am but it took me four As we had no other pets at the time and both of our chilattempts to blow out the candles on my birthday cake dren had already left home, Mrs S was obviously referring to last Tuesday. me. 'If I were you, I'd go to see your doctor for a check-up. 'But I pay you as little attention as possible,' I pointed out. You're not too clever in the breathing department,' observed Which didn't sound right but she knew what I meant. one party guest. Anyway, our Brian had invited four guests to his party -- the 'Okay,' I replied. 'I am due a visit to the surgery -- I haven't Jack Russell who lived up the been there since yesterday. street, a Yorkshire Terrier 'But hang on a minute, Uncle Reg. You're a respiratory from around the corner specialist. Why can't I come to see you? In fact, why don't we whose name I can't retire to the kitchen and you can give me a cursory goingover with the stethoscope?' 'No way,' said Uncle Reg the specialist. 'You should see your own GP, primarily to ensure the continuity of the doctor-patient relationship but mainly because your reputation as an obsessive hypochondriac precedes you. Uncle Reg handed me my hastily-discarded upper garments and declared: 'I'm not getting lumbered with a raving hysteric while I'm relaxing socially.' I put my shirt and tie back on. 'Well if that's how you feel,' I sniffed, 'I shall have to ask you to leave my party. If I need to be insulted in my own home I have Mrs S readily available to fulfil that requirement.' 'A sound argument, nephew,' said Uncle Reg the specialist. 'The only flaw in your reasoning is that this is MY house, not yours.' I scratched my head in puzzlement. 'That's what I don't understand,' I commented. 'How come I'm not celebrating my birthday at home?' 'I'll answer that one,' said Mrs S, retrieving my cardigan from off the floor. 'Because having a party at our house would mean you playing your highly-inappropriate music collection and I refuse to let you show me up in front of our friends.' I scratched my head again and made a mental note to change my brand of shampoo to smarten up my remaining six hairs. 'There's nothing wrong with my music preferences,' I argued. 'It's YOU, my dear, what's not got no taste.' 'Apart from your appalling take on English grammar, I must dispute that last statement,' said Mrs S. 'How do you expect people to waltz to the theme from Psycho or smooch to 55 Days at Peking? It's ridiculous!' 'I happen to love movie themes,' I mumbled in sulky tones. 'But I have other records I can play if people want to dance.' Mrs S shook her head. 'You know what happened the last time we had a party at ours? You put on your Max Bygraves LPs and there was a riot.' 'I can't help it if people get over-excited at one of my raves,' I countered. 'It shows that I give great parties.' Mrs S glared at me. 'The guests rioted in their panic to get out of the house!' Which reminds me. Mrs S once threw a birthday party for our dog Brian. I asked her how she knew it was the mutt's birthday. Mrs S merely shrugged. 'At least he pays me a little attention unlike certain other residents in this house.'

remember (that's the dog not the road) and my cousin Gerald's sociable hamster whose name was Dave. 'You said four guests. That's only three,' pointed out Daft Barry as I recounted the story at the pub the other day. 'Top marks for doing the maths, Barry,' I said. 'But one demerit for failing to spot that it is physically impossible for an animal to issue a party invitation, either verbally or in writing. It was Mrs S who saw to the admin side.' 'So the Yorkie's name was Spot,' said Daft Barry. 'Huh?' I said. 'No, I said I can't remember the Yorkie's name.' 'But you definitely said Spot,' Daft Barry said. I shook my head. 'Yes, yes, I did say the word spot but . . .' Daft Barry looked puzzled. 'So if the Yorkie was not called Spot it must have been the name of the dog who lived in your street?' 'Huh?' I repeated. 'No, I said the Jack Russell lived in my street.' 'But you didn't actually name the Jack Russell,' Daft Barry insisted. 'Okay, okay. So I forgot to mention that. The Jack Russell's name was Scamp,' I sighed. 'Not Jack?' said Daft Barry. 'Or Russell?' Sounds of intense babbling could be heard as the members of the pub discussion group tried to decide what had or had not been said. A vote was then taken and the consensus was that Spot was probably the name of the road in which the Yorkie lived. I was too exhausted to argue and was desperate for the subject of my dog's birthday party to be dropped -- preferably from the top of a sheer cliff and accompanied by a gagged Daft Barry. But then Dave the barman took up the cudgels. 'So who was the fourth guest at Brian's celebration? You didn't say.' 'Er . . . that would have been me,' I mumbled. 'Somebody had to hold the animals' leads otherwise they'd have all dived in and devoured in one rapacious attack the birthday cake Mrs S had lovingly baked and sliced into individual pieces. 'Even Dave the hamster had to be on a leash. He was the greediest of the lot.' 'Wow, Dave!' said Dave the barman. 'You must have looked a real dork standing there like a human maypole. But I guess your Brian enjoyed himself.' 'Er . . . not quite. He couldn't stand the music I'd chosen for pass-the-parcel and he bolted from the house . 'But I managed to track him down to the local animal shelter. The attendant said they had loads of pooches there and I might have difficulty picking him out. 'But I had no trouble identifying my dog. Brian was the one wearing a purple rhinestone party hat and a matching Yappy Birthday scarf.'

My darling princesses Jessica and Henrietta. Hope you are having a lovely holiday.

Love Nan

Friday, August 24, 2012

SAY IT IN SPANISH Learn the lingo - with a little help from JEANETTE ERATH LESSON 34 ¡HOLA! Last week we finished the last of the stem changing verbs; before we move on let´s check how you did: We fry the potatoes – freímos las patatas, I compete - compito, you correct the test – tú corriges el examen, a teacher corrects a lot of tests – Un profesor corrige muchos exámenes, A lot of athletes compete in the Olympics – muchos atletas compiten en las olimpicos, we elect the winner – elegimos el ganador, she laughs a lot – ella ríe mucho, he deduces the truth from the facts (the facts=los hechos) – él colige la verdad de los hechos, who says this? - ¿quién dice esto? We have been learning a lot of new words and verbs recently so I think it´s time for a bit of revision of what we have been learning. Don´t forget, though, that all this learning has to be put into practice by speaking whenever possible. We are going to be incorporating everything we have learnt over the past 33 weeks, just to keep you on your toes and remembering what you´ve learnt. Firstly put the correct word for the in the blanks: …............... libro, …...................... mesa, … .......................... coche, …........................... manzanas, …................ manos, …...................perros, … ........................ helado, ….......................... sofá Now add the Spanish for a, an or some: ….................. bolsa, …...................pelos, … ..................... dientes, …........................... camisa, ….................. niño, …................... patatas, … .................... árbol, …......................... botella Translate the following into Spanish: I have a red car, do you have to go? We are going to

the beach, I am hungry, Are you happy? I am going to the party, I am going to have a party, you are coming tomorrow, I have to study, I am English, I do not speak Spanish very well, I have to learn Spanish, I am going tomorrow morning, I am going to see it, It´s hot (weather), It´s the dog´s bone, thank you for the help, I hang my clothes. Now translate the following Spanish into English, do not translate directly but write it how you would say it in

English. For example if I wrote ´tengo dos años´ your answer should be ´I am two years old´. ¿Quieres ir a la playa? Tengo que leer el libro, ¿Vas a ir a la tienda? Tengo razón, Si vas a la fiesta voy a ir también, Tienes una casa grande, ¿Cuántos hijos tienes? Vamos el lunes que viene, La casa es mía. Finally, I will give you a short paragraph to translate into Spanish, this sort of translation I find one of the most useful ways to learn Spanish as we are putting the words we learn into sentences. Once you have written out the following in Spanish, be sure to read it through over and over again, make sure the sentences sound correct and the correct verbs are used. Enjoy this and try to spend the whole week on it. Speak the paragraph out loud and practise your verbal Spanish as well as your written Spanish. My name is José and today is my birthday. I am ten years old. All my friends are in my house because I am going to have a big party. They are hungry and thirsty. I am happy today. I go to the bakery every birthday and I have a big cake. This year I am going to have a cake with lots of flowers. It is six o´clock and we are going to dance, then later we eat. I am going to have a very good day. I hope you have managed to complete all the above, use dictionaries or translators as you need and take your time. We are learning to build sentences and this goes towards confident speaking. Have a great week.

Friday, August 24, 2012

WHY DO THEY DO THAT? Top dog psychologist PETER SINGH writes exclusively for The Courier. Check out www.thedogyouneed.com or email Peter at peter@thedogyouneed.com

THE PERFECT BLEND How to develop an ideal relationship with your dog, Part 1

THE WALK/EXERCISE The closest way to bond with your dog is by walking your dog, twice each day. A backyard is not a substitute for a walk. We as humans can go where we want, when we want. We have our friends, our work, our entertainment, our holidays OUR DOGS ONLY HAVE US. A dog wants to see and share the world as much as we do and by doing so this is how they grow mentally and this in turn leads to balance. Share your world with your dog, because your dog will always share their world with you.

THE DOG DOGS are born balanced and only know calm, assertive energy, which they receive from their Mother. They need structure and discipline in their lives and if they feel you are not leading them, they will lead you. If you react in a frustrated way, your dog will view this as weakness. If you are nervous or anxious around your dogs, they view this as you being unstable. They look to us to be strong, calm leaders, where they always know they can depend on us to guide them through any situation. This in turn creates trust, loyalty and respect.

CORRECTIONS When correcting your dog, make a sound that stops the unwanted behaviour and WAIT for your dog to give you calm, then walk away. By waiting for them to show calm you are showing your dog that this is the behaviour you require from them. Always correct at level one of the unwanted behaviour. So in the case of aggression, correct when you notice the tail going upright or an ear becoming alert, instead of correcting when there is a full-blown fight.

THE HUMAN Because humans and dogs are different species, we must remember that their needs are different to ours. We live our daily lives guided by equality, but dogs need to know you are their guardian. A guardian who leads in a gentle but firm way, just as you would with a child. Some humans share nervous, anxious, emotional, frustrated or weak energy with their dog, which to them is completely unnatural. Your dog will then mirror the exact energy you are giving them. The only energy to share is that of a calm leader, consistently. CALM Living in today’s world can bring with it many pressures and worries, which can lead to us sometimes showing anxious and frustrated behaviour. While we are at times worried about 101 things we forget how important it is to practise relaxation in some form and quieten the mind . This can be

AFFECTION

is fulfillment og leads to h d r u yo g in d Understan yoga, meditation or even sitting in a quiet room for five minutes each day and enjoying complete silence. Then, and only then, can you 100% connect with the dog in your life, on their natural level. As well as your dog, the people in your life will also notice a positive change within you. A level where you are totally calm and exhibiting leadership qualities. This is the same energy that their Mothers so successfully communicated to them from birth.

Only give your dog affection when they are calm and showing behaviour you approve of. If you give your dog affection when they are doing something you do not agree with, you will be nurturing that behaviour. It is exactly the same when your dog is showing fear over something or someone. If a firework were to go off and your dog came running to you shaking and in fear, do not give affection at this point, as you again will be nurturing that fear. When your dog hears or sees something he is unsure of, you will always be his first point of reference. He will glance at you to see what your reaction is, i.e. a firework, so do not make a fuss of the noise or obstacle yourself. Just ignore the noise and if your dog starts to constantly bark, use the correction technique. And as always, be the calm you want your dog to show.

PETS’ CORNER: CAN YOU TAKE IN A HOMELESS DOG OR CAT?

Maisie

has a sweet,xx calm nature. LISA is about 20 months. She was found scavenging in a bin in the campo. She was very thin, hungry and quite nervous, but has responded well. SAT 966 710 047 info@satanimalrescue.com www.satanimalrescue.com

MAISIE is a black Labrador cross, about 15 months old. She doesn’t like cats but loves people. She is happy with male dogs but not good with other bitches. Ideally she needs a family used to dogs. K9 Club 633 936 501 www.k9club.es k9clubinfo@gmail.com

Apollo

new friend he gets very quickly finds a home, but poor Apollo is left behind. He gets on well with other dogs and loves to play and go for walks. Both dogs are chipped and neutered. Natasha 616210850 www.apahrescue.org

Lisa Katrina KATRINA is a one-yearold German Shepherd crossbreed who came into our care in June. She was found sitting outside a crematorium, where she’d been for five days. We don’t know if she was there because her owner had died. She

RONDA is two years old, and was found dumped on a roundabout. She gets on very well with other dogs due to her soft, kind and gentle nature. Apollo is 18 months old and has been with APAH for a while. Every

Ronda

Friday, August 24, 2012

LÍNEA DIRECTA REPORTS ON THE NEW FRENCH LEGISLATION ON DRINK DRIVING From July 1st, all French drivers driving on roads in France must carry a breathalyser kit in their cars. The measure, announced by the previous government, was due to take effect four months ago, but the rush to buy the kits has led to supplies being sold out, which has led to a moratorium on the introduction of the devices. According to the French authorities, the regulation, the first of its kind to be introduced in the European Union, will also affect foreign drivers who drive in France, although they will not be required to have the device installed in their vehicles until November. In addition, breathalysers will also be obligatory in all discotheques and bars which have a licence to open at night. By implementing this law, the French government hopes to save 500 lives a year, due to the presence of alcohol being detected in almost a third of all fatal accidents occurring in France. In addition to this regulation, the French authorities have approved a packet of measures aimed at reducing the accident rate on roads, which include: • An increase on the road network in the number of fixed speed cameras to 2,500, which will not be signposted. • The introduction of new generation mobile speed cameras, which allow a travelling police car to measure speed. • All motorists must carry a high-visibility vest and a warning triangle.

Call Línea Directa: 902 123 104

Friday, August 24, 2012

Freedom to choose WHAT are we, as parents, meant to teach our children? How are we supposed to raise them? There are many books on the subjects of having babies, raising happy babies, helping our children grow, etc. but many parents don´t read these. I know, I´ve never read one. I´ll admit to checking a few websites for ideas for play but when it comes to actually raising a happy healthy child, what do we do? All parents worry about their children, from the moment they are born we are given this huge amount of responsibility. I believe nature and nurture both play a part in how we turn out; if it was just nature then all siblings would be the same and if it was nurture then all children born or raised in loving families would turn out to be good members of the community - which is sadly not true. So how do we ensure our little bundle of joy grows into a happy, healthy young adult? As I am not an expert on child raising I´m not going to sit here writing about what parents should be doing in great detail, but there is one point on child raising that I think is extremely important.

Our children deserve to grow up with respect. Not them respecting us but the other way around. We should be setting an example for them to learn from, and part of that is letting our children make their own minds up about certain topics. Forcing our ideas onto our children is not a way to move forward in this world; they are more intelligent than we give them credit for and a young child is an open book, always learning, always asking. I believe that our children should be given facts and left to make up their own mind about life. Let me give you an example. I am a

I vegetarian, been have since the age of 11. Since the day I told my family that I was no longer going to eat meat or fish not one has morsel passed my lips. I vegetarian am because I, personally, cannot bear the thought of a piece of dead flesh crossing my However, lips. that is my choice. I believe I was born a vegetarian, as from as young as I can remember I never wanted to eat meat. But that is beside the point, the thing is that it is me that doesn´t eat meat. If someone asks me why I don´t eat meat I will tell them but I never instigate the conversation and do not feel the need to justify my decision. This being my decision, I also decided when I had children that they would eat meat. It is not for

me to tell my son that he must eat vegetarian food until he is old enough to decide for himself, it is up to me to give him the choice. As it is he eats hardly any red meat, but he does like chicken and fish. I will also bring him up to learn about religion but none will be forced on him; he will be free to decide his beliefs as he grows. I will not teach him that homosexuality is wrong nor to judge people as certain religions do. I will teach him that we are all the same regardless of race, religion or status and that we should respect people who deserve it and this is learned through living. To this end I hope my son will grow up with an open mind, learn to accept all races, creeds and colours and know that, as long as he sticks to the right side of the law, I will support him and his lifestyle 100 percent. After all, he is my boy and I will not have anyone tell me that he has to follow my life choices, as I hope no one forces theirs on their offspring. Freedom to learn from their mistakes, make their own decisions and grow into happy healthy adults - that is the best gift we can give our impressionable young.

Friday, August 24, 2012

I GREATLY respect the Wikileaks guy Julian Assange and his fight for press freedom. His whistle-blowing team have uncovered some hypocritical political moves by America and others, and you can’t help smelling a rat over those convenient sexual assault allegations from Sweden last year, and the subsequent extradition order. The charges are serious (we are not talking of a parking ticket here) and Assange must face them in a Swedish court, rather than hiding in London’s Ecuadorian Embassy with the fig leaf of political asylum. So why can’t the Stockholm authorities give him a guarantee of no extradition to America over the Wikileaks revelations, so that he can go there and face the court? It may surprise you to hear that the Swedes are one of the world’s biggest arms producers, and there are no prizes for guessing that America are one of their biggest customers! Assange, though, hasn’t covered himself in glory by dancing to the Ecuadorians and not having done his homework. President Rafael Correa has elections coming up, and Ecuadorian newspapers have been gagged for printing views contrary to Correa, which seems to me to be totally against the ethos of Wikileaks. Meanwhile the UK has completely overreacted by

privately threatening the storming of the Ecuadorian Embassy, which is against the Vienna Convention. Correa has lapped that up and got most of Latin America to vent their anger against the British, who are not that popular anyway due to the Falklands. Add last Sunday’s Eva Peron balcony-style appearance by Assange and a ridiculous high number of police, who were not there for last summer’s riots, and the Brits really seem be mired in a smelly cesspit of bother. Assange has got himself and Wikileaks some fantastic publicity, whilst William Hague is blustering away from a prepared script, keen not to upset Sweden and the

WHEN ONE ECUADOR CLOSES...

United States. I haven’t a clue as to how this is going to end, but if I were the Foreign Office, I’d quickly uncover some old statute that would allow Assange safe passage with an Ecuadorian diplomat on the next available flight to Quito! The Russian punk band, Pussy Riot, caused a storm a few months ago when they marched into a Moscow cathedral and sang an antiVladimir Putin song. This, not too surprisingly, upset the Russian Orthodox Church and seriously, what would you h a v e

thought about the Sex Pistols years ago, rolling up at St. Paul’s Cathedral to spew out some of their bile? I’ve no truck at all with Putin and what he’s been doing to dismantle democratic opposition in Russia, though I have some sympathy for church-goers who got something that they didn’t quite bargain for. A few roubles fine would have done the job but the two-year prison sentence handed out to the women was way over the top. You do wonder, though, what the punishment would have been had they chosen to sing something against Putin’s opponents? Of even more concern is that, despite the cheerful photos of Vlad sitting next to David Cameron at the Olympics, Russia is becoming more and more isolated on so many things. It’s

VIRGIN ON DISASTER! Now Atlantic jets soar into flap over low-fuel

TWO Virgin Atlantic passenger jets issued emergency alerts on the same day this year because they were running out of fuel. Air traffic controllers dealt with a total of four lowfuel emergencies at Stansted Airport in Essex that day – including a ‘mayday’ call. Two were Virgin 747s, which can carry 451 passengers each. They needed priority landing after flying from America, according to an investigation by the Exaro website. Virgin Atlantic denied that the planes – named Jersey Girl and Hot Lips – issued maydays. They had been diverted from Gatwick because of severe winds. A passenger on Jersey Girl

included Heathrow, Birmingham, E d i n b u r g h , L i v e r p o o l , Manchester and Nottingham. Commercial passenger aircraft are legally required to have enough fuel to reach their destination and perform a ‘go-around’ – when the landing is aborted and the plane flies around the airport for another attempt – and divert to another airport plus stay in a holding pattern for 30 minutes. Virgin Atlantic said: ‘Due to severe and abnormal weather conditions, two flights in January 2012 were diverted to Stansted. Our fuel management procedures are approved by the CAA and comply with all industry regulations.’

Virgin’s 747 “Hot Lips”

said: ‘To see so many fire engines on landing made me realise it could have been bad.’ On the same day, an Embraer 190, which can carry 114 passengers, was diverted to Southampton and put out a mayday over fuel. The revelation comes as Spanish authorities investi-

gate Ryanair for three lowfuel maydays in Valencia. There have been at least 28 cases of UK passenger airlines declaring low-fuel emergencies in the last two years while flying to airports in Britain, the Civil Aviation Authority has revealed. Three were mayday calls made in the first five months of this year. Destinations

hard to work out what Putin is trying to achieve by it all, except that it shows him as being very insecure, thus stopping his country from being a big world player that everybody respects. Five largely unknown Tory MP’s have got some cheap publicity for a book which says that British workers are amongst the idlest in the world, and that many people prefer to have a lie-in as opposed to hard work. To make things even more entertaining, they say that the Asian work ethic needs to be copied, along with a big reduction in taxation. Amazing stuff, but where is

the evidence to back all of this up? Of course there are back-siders around, but you get those in every country, and such ridiculous broad statements are doubly worrying when they come from Members of Parliament, who ought to know better. Of even greater concern, two of these right-wingers, Elizabeth Truss and Dominic Raab, are being tipped for future ministerial office at the behest of David Cameron, who is worried by pressure from that part of his party. Even at this early stage, you can see the battle lines being drawn for the 2015 election, and it’s not going to be pretty!

Friday, August 24, 2012

A NATION IN A STATE

WHAT do the running of the railways, policing of the Olympics, the banks, cosmetic surgery and the car insurance industry have in common? The answer is that they are or were in the hands of private enterprise and have either proved to be not fit for purpose, or have attracted outright criticism from their customers. This paranoiac belief among Tories that private enterprise can run anything and everything better than the State has, in my view, done a great disservice to Britain. And the Labour party's and trade unions' belief that everything can be done better if the State has control of it has completed this dysfunctional circle. Let's first look at the railways. Instead of having State-run British Rail (which originally created the best railway service in the world), we have a mish-mash of private companies running (or perhaps not) the railways, and every so often these companies have to compete to get the franchise for the future. Each has to provide a pot of gold to the government for the right to operate, and an obvious consequence of this is to inflate the bid to get the franchise. Take last week's bid result for the West Coast Mainline, lost by Virgin and won by FirstGroup, which also has other franchises. To win, it offered £0.8billion more than Virgin and promised more trains, a better service and more investment. Come on, are we to believe FirstGroup can pay the government more and deliver more investment and provide a better service all at the same time? Look out for a flock of pigs flying over the rail tracks! Railway tickets in Britain are among the most expensive in Europe and travellers and commuters are often provided with a mediocre service at best. In my view we need State-run railways, with the government's only involvement being to kick arse to get the railways fit for purpose, and get rid of these rail operating companies, all with their boardrooms and fat cat directors, . We've heard about the disgraceful episode of the private company G4S and its inability to provide security for the Olympic Games. Security, whether it involves our country's defence, border controls or policing at major events, should be in the hands of the military and not private companies with a profit motive. The banks? Well, here's the perfect example where the profit motive failed not only Britain but brought about a worldwide recession. Would a State-run banking system have been so irresponsible? Certainly not.

insured. There are many things that private enterprise does better, and a healthy private sector is the driving force for a vibrant economy. I'm no rabid Socialist. But I believe that there are some areas where the obsession with private enterprise has damaged Britain, and it's ended up selling the public down the river. I was delighted last week to see yet another exposure of the ridiculous bottled water ‘industry’. There was much criticism over Tesco and Asda selling tap water in bottles for 17p a throw. Crazy. If ever there was a waste of money, buying bottled water is. Water throughout Britain has to pass countless tests to ensure it is fit to drink. Yes, it contains chemicals to prevent invasion from bacteria (which, obviously is a good thing) but you could drink tap water all your life and it would not harm you.In fact it would be far more beneficial than much of the other rubbish we pour down our throats. But the bottled water con involves selling you, at hugely inflated prices, water which does not contain chemicals which kill the bugs, advertised as "spring" water, or "natural" water. That means that after a short time of opening the top, there's the chance of a stray bug getting into the bottle and enjoying a bath in the "pure" water. And if it's allowed to do its stuff long enough can give you a very poorly tummy. I love the names of some of the places where the bottled water is supposed to come from. I visited one and it was the scruffiest of places. When I was a working journalist, I covered the meetings of a water company which was highly delighted at the extra money it was making by selling bottled water. It was no purer than the water they were supplying to customers through the taps. But instead of getting a fraction of a penny per litre, it was making huge profits from people buying its bottled water. Same water! What a con! Can you tell me why you don't fill up a bottle from the tap and drink that when you're out? Of have you got money to throw away? And before you start rabbiting on about the water in Spain perhaps not being quite so good as that in the UK, let me say this. Every moment I'm in Spain I drink the tap water. I'm still alive, I don't have a single medical problem. I do not and will not waste my money on bottled water. The same quality controls which govern the quality of water in the UK apply in Spain and throughout the EU. So, take a tip from me, stop buying bottled water and save your money. And in a restaurant, ask for tap water.

Now take the ridiculous situation over the cosmetic ‘industry’, which has been allowed to run riot for years without proper regulation, culminating in thousands of people having breast implants not fit for purpose. All manner of procedures have been carried out by people who have limited qualifications. It's been an industry that has been totally profit driven, an industry cashing in on people's vanity. Megabucks have been made and a lot of people have been hurt. I will pose a question. If there were no private health companies and everyone had to go through the NHS for every and any kind of treatment, how good would British hospitals and doctors' surgeries be if the rich had to take their turn with the poor? Overnight we would see a massive improvement in the entire health service if the rich couldn't opt out. And how good would State education become if there were no private schools for the rich to opt into? How much more funding would suddenly reach the state education system? How quickly the class divide would ebb away if all children were state educated. Car insurance? Try turning on any commercial TV channel and within a few minutes there’s a car insurance ad. Just imagine the money thrown away over car insurance advertising. Then add up all the salaries of the fat cats in all the insurance companies. You and I are paying for all of it. How much better would it be if we paid for car insurance with the car tax in a State-run system? The disc would be displayed in the windscreen and we all would know the car was

SANQUIST FOR SPECIAL SERVICE DEREK McLEAN and Christian Mesa are the partnership that head up Sanquist SL. A legally registered Spanish construction company operating on the Costa Blanca, Sanquist specialises in pools, terracing extensions and garages. Derek and Christian have many years building experience and have been working in Spain together since 2001. Sanquist has been trading for eight years and in the highly competitive construction and renovation industry, they are getting it right. Sanquist offers its customers the full package. Say, for instance, you want a swimming pool, you contact the company and somebody comes round and measures up and gives you a quote. You get several quotes and decide to go with Sanquist (sensible you). Sanquist will design the pool to comply with local legislation and the area available. Did you know in Torrevieja that the edge of the water in your pool must be at least a metre away from the boundary of the property? Down the road in Orihuela Costa it’s different again. With years of experience, Sanquist know who to see in which town hall for the correct licences. All work carried out is legal. Tel: 966 710 161 www.sanquistconstructions.com

Friday, August 24, 2012

Put a taste of Spain in your supper HAVE some chorizo lurking in your fridge but not sure what to do with it? Our chorizo recipes make the most of the intense flavour of this Spanish sausage and, what's more, a little goes a long way. PORK, CHORIZO AND FENNEL STIR-FRY A delicious pork stir-fry recipe that will be on the table in less than 20 minutes. Serve with creamy polenta for a quick midweek meal.

Ingredients

1.1 tbsp olive oil 2.200g raw chorizo sausage, cut into chunks 3.4 small (175g) pork loin steaks, sliced 4.Grated zest of 1 lemon and a squeeze of lemon juice 5.1 large red onion, cut into wedges 6.1 large fennel bulb, sliced 7.150g green beans, halved 8.Glass of white wine 9.100ml chicken or vegetable stock, hot

Method

1. Heat the olive oil in a large frying pan or wok over a medium heat. Add the chorizo and fry for 5 minutes until it is releasing its oil and turning golden. Remove from the pan with a slotted spoon and set aside. 2. Add the sliced pork and lemon zest to the pan or wok, season well and cook for 5 minutes until the pork is browned all over. Remove with a slotted spoon and set aside. Add the onion and fen-

nel to the pan and fry for a further 5 minutes until softened. Add the cooked pork, chorizo and halved green beans. Season well, add the lemon juice, wine and stock and simmer for a further 3-4 minutes. 3. Spoon the stir-fry onto a serving platter and serve with the creamy polenta.

Continued on p18

Friday, August 24, 2012

Put a taste of Spain in your supper CHORIZO AND SQUASH RISOTTO Ready in just 30 minutes, this risotto recipe is the perfect midweek supper. For a veggie option, omit the chorizo and add goat’s cheese at the end.

4.400g can chopped tomatoes 5.200g baby spinach, washed drained 6.125g mozzarella

Method

1. Cook the gnocchi in salted boiling water for 2 minutes less than the pack instructions, then drain and add to a large ovenproof dish. 2. Preheat the oven to 200°C/fan180°C/gas 6. Add the chorizo to a dry frying pan over a medium heat. Cook, stirring, for 4 minutes, until the chorizo is sizzling and browning at the edges. 3. Stir in the garlic clove, the chopped tomatoes and baby spinach. Heat through to wilt the spinach, season to taste and pour over the gnocchi in the ovenproof dish. 4. Scatter with mozzarella, torn into pieces, and bake for 10-15 minutes, until bubbling and golden.

MUSSELS WITH CHORIZO

Seafood with pork is a very Iberian pairing. The sweetness of one plays very well off the fatty saltiness of the other. You could use dry cider here, as they would in parts of northern Spain, instead of white wine.

Ingredients 1.900ml chicken stock 2.1 small winter squash, such kabocha, peeled, deseeded and diced 3.75g chorizo, diced 4.150g risotto rice 5.50g frozen peas 6.Parmesan shavings, to serve

QUICK BAKED GNOCCHI WITH CHORIZO, SPINACH AND MOZZARELLA

This deliciously cheesy dish works well with any pasta shapes. Double the recipe for a flavour-packed family supper.

Ingredients

1.500g fresh gnocchi 2.100g chorizo, roughly chopped 3.1 garlic clove, crushed

OMELETTE WITH CHORIZO AND CAMEMBERT

This chorizo omelette is so packed with ingredients it makes a really satisfying meal.

Ingredients

2.Glug of olive oil 3.Knob of butter 4.2 shallots, finely sliced 5.75-100g sliced chorizo, cut into strips 6.200g fresh or frozen peas 7.Finely grated zest of 1 lemon, plus a squeeze of lemon juice 8.75ml crème fraîche 9.50g Pecorino shavings

Method

1. Cook the pasta in a saucepan of boiling salted water until tender, then drain and toss with a little of the cooking water and the olive oil. 2. Meanwhile, heat the butter in a pan and gently fry the shallots for 5 minutes or until

Method

1. Put the chicken stock in a pan and bring to the boil. Add the squash and parboil for 23 minutes. Lift out the squash using a slotted spoon and set both aside, leaving the stock over a low heat. 2. Meanwhile, fry the chorizo in a saucepan over a medium heat for 3-4 minutes until browned. Remove from the pan and set aside. 3. Add the rice and stir for 1 minute in the chorizo oil. Reduce the heat slightly and stir in the squash and some hot stock. Stir until the stock has been absorbed, then gradually add more stock, stirring often, until the rice is just cooked – about 20 minutes. 4. Stir in the frozen peas and cook for 2-3 minutes. Stir in the cooked chorizo and season to taste. Divide between shallow bowls and top with fresh parmesan shavings, if you like.

beginning to crisp. Add the chorizo, cook until crisp, then mix into the pasta. Blanch the peas in a pan of boiling water, then add to the pasta with the lemon zest and juice and crème fraîche. Mix well and serve, sprinkled with the Pecorino.

and

Ingredients 1.2kg mussels 2.3 tbsp olive oil 3.1 large onion, finely chopped 4.200g chorizo, skin removed and cut into chunks or rounds 5.2 garlic cloves, finely chopped 6.500ml dry white wine 7.3 tbsp chopped fresh flatleaf parsley, plus extra sprigs, to garnish

Method

1. Clean the mussels really well, scrubbing the shells and removing the beards. Throw away any which are broken or don’t close when tapped on the side of the sink. 2. Heat the olive oil in a large pan, add the chopped onion and sauté for 2-3 minutes, until slightly coloured. Add the chorizo and cook for a further 2 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for another few minutes. Throw in the mussels, pour in the wine and season with black pepper. Cover the pan, bring the liquid to the boil then turn the heat down to medium for 5 minutes, until the mussels steam open. . Throw away any mussels that haven’t opened. Stir in the chopped parsley and ladle the mussels into soup plates. Garnish with parsley sprigs and serve.

PEA, CHORIZO AND PECORINO PASTA

A meaty, cheesey pasta dish that's a good budget recipe.

Ingredients

1.400g pasta shapes, such as large shells (from major supermarkets)

1.4 large organic eggs 2.2 tspn water 3.3 tspn chopped chives 4.100g chorizo 5.1 thick slice of crusty bread 6.1 tspn vegetable oil 7.50g diced Camembert 8.2 tspn olive oil

Method

1. Take eggs and beat in a bowl with water and chopped chives. 2. Thinly slice chorizo and add to the egg mixture, along with a thick slice of crusty bread, torn into pieces. Season. 3. Heat vegetable oil in a small frying pan until very hot. Add the egg mix, reduce the heat and cook for 2-3 minutes, stirring to begin with, until nearly all the egg has set. 4. Top with Camembert and pop under a hot grill for 2-3 minutes until puffy and golden. Drizzle with olive oil, divide between 2 plates.

Friday, August 24, 2012

“Good health” isn’t just Is It Time for a Change? the absence of illness

There are many ways to overcome your health challenges naturally, so you can feel and look your best. It may be that you are intolerant to some foods that you have tried over the years to identify but failed. Finding the cause of your ill health is now available to you using the one of the most clinically proven computerised complementary health screening technology. Here are some of the common illnesses and health issues that we can help with: Arthritis Asthma Candida Depression Eczema Fatigue Fibromyalgia Food Intolerances Hay Fever/Allergies

Irritable Bowel Menopause Migraine ME Multiple Sclerosis Parasites Psoriasis Skin problems Sleep Disorders Stress Thyroid Issues Weight Management

all connected. Did you know if you have stiff joints and suspect arthritis, just by reducing the amount of bread you eat may give you some relief from the everyday pain, but taking out the guess work is the best way? The problems in your diet or nutrition can be easily identified by using the advanced non-invasive We will give you easy- screening technology of to-follow programs and the Asyra AT3 and Asyra treatment methods that Pro providing all the inforare designed especially mation needed to do just for you. that. It eliminates all of the Mapping the Way guesswork and gives you Forward to Good Health effective treatment. Once Conventional medicines the results have been seek to treat the painful analysed you will be given and disruptive symptoms clear instructions on any of ill health; but they are vitamins or supplements often harsh and do not that you need to regain address the causes. your health along with We may think we are foods that you are intolereating a healthy diet but ant to. sometimes it could be one Call 965 326 082 or food that is causing a myr- email info@medaesthetiad of problems that are ics.es for more details.

NEVER underestimate the power of your hairstyle to add to your professional image or to undermine it. Having a professional image is more than having nice clothes. It is creating a look that is harmonious which means paying attention to all aspects of image – makeup, skincare, clothing, posture, body type, accessories, etiquette and hair. If either of the aspects of image is discarded the whole look is ruined. Hairstyle and hair upkeep play a major role in creating a professional image and keeping your look upto-date is a must. To keep your hair looking great avoid these mistakes: 1. Wearing a lot of hairstyle products to keep your hair “in place” will leave your hair looking stiff and unattractive. Hair should be soft, natural and able to move. 2. Do you still have the same hairstyle you had in high school? Take out an old picture and have a look. If you answered ‘yes’ there is no doubt that it is time for a change. Also, if you are over the age of thirteen don’t put barrettes or bows in your hair. 3. If you have curly hair and use straight-

ening products and tools daily to get the look you want you are probably working too hard. Take pride in your curls and use products that enhance your hair’s naturalness and use straightening products sparingly. 4. If you make a slight change in your hairstyle and the compliments start pouring in it could be that your friends are giving you subtle hints and it is time for a change. 5. If it seems that your hair never looks the way you want and you end up wearing a ponytail most of the time it is time for a cut and style. 6. The number one hair buster is roots that show – especially if they are grown out an inch or more. Before you color your hair decide if it is something that you will continue to do. If not, don’t do it. 7. When you color your hair take your skin tone into consideration. For instance, if you have extremely white skin, don’t color your hair black. As you age, your skin color changes. Keep this in mind when choosing hair color and ask your hairstylist for recommendations.

Friday, August 24, 2012

Meno-cause for concern

FOR the past five months, I have been suffering from tingling sensations in my hands and feet, occasional pain around my lower belly, discomfort while passing urine, feelings of anxiety and sadness, and a feeling of heaviness all over my body. I turned 43 this year, and wonder if my symptoms have anything to do with Menopause.

enlargement by stopping the production of chemicals that cause inflammation. Potent anti-oxidants such as Vitamin E and bioflavonoids provide strong protection against oxidative damage to the prostate. The amino acids glycine, glutamic acid and alanine as well as Vitamin A have also been found helpful. These extracts alone or in combination with other essential nutrients are available as supplements, and available at www.medb.es

THE symptoms you describe can be due to menopause even though in most women it starts in their 50s. However, it is important that you visit a doctor for a full health scan to exclude other possible causes of your symptoms such as Heart disease and Thyroid disorders. Other likely causes include raised blood pressure and a deficiency of certain vitamins and minerals. If your condition is due to menopause, it can be relieved with phytoestrogens such as isoflavones, which are plant extracts with a similar structure to the natural hormone but without the dangerous side-effects.

I HAVE some trouble passing urine. I do not feel any pain, but a feeling that I have to squeeze more to urinate. My doctor performed a rectal examination and PSA analysis and did not find anything wrong. He thinks it may be due to a normal enlargement of the prostate due to my age. Are there any drugs that can reduce or stop the enlargement?

THERE are plant extracts that have been clinically studied and known to have beneficial effects on the prostate gland. Several studies show that SAW PALMETTO is very effective for treating the symptoms of Benign Prostate Enlargement (BPH) such as frequent urination and problems with starting or maintaining urination. Saw palmetto has actually been shown to be as effective as some medications used in hospitals but without the loss of libido. The extracts from Stinging Nettle are also effective in reducing the symptoms of Prostate

I FEEL a lot of pressure in my stomach especially after eating. I also feel bloated and make a lot of wind. The problem started 7 months ago when I moved to Spain from England. My GP in England thinks it is just nerves and has prescribed antacids. Lately I have felt slight pain in the left side of my abdomen AND worry that the problem may be worse than nerves. I would like to know your opinion.

I would have liked to know more about your problem such as when the pain is worse, and if you feel the symptoms all the time. There are a number of conditions that may cause your problem. Peptic ulcer disease causes abdominal discomfort and pain. It occurs when there is a disturbance to the mucous lining of the stomach sometimes caused by bacterial infection or certain drugs. Gall bladder disease is also a likely cause of your symptoms, and can

cause abdominal pain especially after a meal high in fat content. Because your symptoms started after you moved to Spain, I also suspect that you may have a parasitic infestation. Many people do not realise that infection with parasitic worms can be common in Spain. My advice to you would be to request a very comprehensive diagnostic screening test from your doctor. This will allow for a proper assessment of your condition.

I READ your weekly health column with interest and wonder if you can help with my problem. Very recently I started feeling a burning sensation on my left hand. This feeling persists nearly all day long and sometimes leaves my hand numb. Sometimes I also feel pins and needles that go up to my shoulder. Apart from these problems, I am in excellent health and haven’t been to the doctor’s in nearly 20 years, but will see one if I have to.

You seem to have a condition known as carpal tunnel syndrome. There is a tight area in the wrist known as carpal tunnel that contains wrist bones, nerves and arteries. Sometimes the nerve may become compressed due to unknown reasons, leading to symptoms similar to yours. You should visit your doctor who would probably refer you to a surgeon to confirm the diagnosis. Surgical decompression of the area is very useful if performed early. Anti-inflammatory medications are also beneficial.

CAN YOU TRUST YOUR MEDICATION? A FEW weeks ago, the British pharmaceutical company GlaxoSmithKline was fined a whopping $3 billion by the authorities in the United States for engaging in criminal practices. The company was charged with fabricating drug safety data and clinical trial data, deceiving regulators about the effectiveness of its drugs, routinely bribing doctors with luxury vacations among many other allegations. GlaxoSmithKline did not deny the charges. The company simply paid the fine, apologised to its customers and continued conducting business as usual. What I find very disturbing is that this particular company has a long history of illegal practices and heinous crimes

DR MACHI MANNU’S ADVICE CLINIC Email your questions and comments to machimannu@gmail.com

against the public. In 2010 GlaxoSmithKline was found guilty of knowingly selling contaminated baby ointment, as well as selling 20 drugs with questionable safety including an ineffective antidepressant to the public. The company paid the fine of $750 million which pales in comparison with over $3 billion paid in 2006 for fraudulent taxation practices. And there is more. It is well known by the Criminal Justice Systems that the menace to society is really not the first time offender who could have committed a crime for a number of understandable rea-

sons, but the repeat offender who either has an utter disregard for the laws of society, or is perhaps suffering from a deeper wound to the psyche. We feel concerned and uneasy about repeat offenders because we recognise that it is only a matter of time before another crime is likely committed by them. The sad truth is that these crimes against humanity seem to be common and widespread among the major pharmaceutical companies. In 2010 the drug company AstraZeneca was hit with a fine of $520 million for misleading doctors and patients about the safety of its antipsychotic drug, Seroquel. The same year, the drug giant Allergan was also fined

$600 million for false labelling of their products. And the list goes on. The shocking reality is that to date not a single person has been arrested and charged in connection with these crimes. Quite clearly the law seems to be applied differently when pharmaceutical companies are involved. In most cases the criminal practices were only acknowledged by the companies when whistle-blowers made them public. Is it possible that there is more corruption we are ignorant of? The decadent conduct of these companies is only possible because we collectively consent to these crimes through our inaction. And there is a lot you can do to protect yourself and contribute to a change. Realise that every drug, especially chemical ones, is a poison. Find out from your doctor all you can about any medication you have been prescribed. Since most doctors have a superficial knowledge of the drugs they prescribe, you

may be better off doing your own research online to find out more about a drug’s side effects and interactions. Nearly all the time, it is the newer medications without any track record of usage by the public that are problematic and dangerous. In addition, ask your doctor if there are more natural substitutes for your prescribed medication. Staying healthy should be paramount on your mind, and this can be achieved through a healthy

diet. Hippocrates, the ancient Greek doctor, once said, ‘Let food be thy medicine and let thy medicine be food’. Today clinical studies and research can confirm the vital importance of food and nutritional supplements in maintaining excellent health and preventing disease. This makes sense. After all we all understand the role food plays in living. Visit www.medb.es for more information on quality nutritional supplements.

Friday, August 24, 2012

RICHARD CAVENDER

Bluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services company on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computer services at realistic prices and specialise in working with home users and small businesses.

Richard moved to Spain seven years ago having left his management background behind in the UK and decided to use his IT skills to help home users and small businesses with their PC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man' he is out and about in the Spanish sun every day, making house and shop calls and using his vast experience and qualifications to (usually) sort out the problem there and then. Computers are his hobby as well as his work so don’t be surprised to get an answer to your email in the early hours!

ADVICE: Stan was having problems with AutoComplete in ADVICE: Ray was having some issues with Adobe Flash Internet Explorer player not playing well with his computer Hi Richard. Having trouble turning off autosuggest, I have even tried going into the preferences page and unticking the turn on suggestions box and saving which is ok until I close I.E and when I reopen it and I have to go through it all again how can I turn this off for good? Stan

Hi Stan, I w o n d e r whether you m e a n AutoComplete in Internet Explorer? In which case you need to do the following… 1. Open Microsoft Internet Explorer. 2. Click Tools and then Internet Options. 3. In the Internet Options window click the Content tab. 4. Click the AutoComplete button. 5. Check or uncheck the options you wish to have or not have AutoComplete.

ADVICE: Sally had accidentally moved his task bar to the right of the screen and wanted to get it back to the bottom.

Q A

I have somehow managed to drop my diary on to the mouse this in turn moved the begin bar at the bottom of the screen to the right side of the screen. Please can you advise on how to move the bar back to the bottom of the screen?

Hi Sally, in order to move the task bar you need to click and hold an area of it that is blank (i.e. an area that doesn’t have an icon to launch a program) when you click, hold and drag, you will move the task bar. So in your case, click hold and drag towards the bottom of the screen and you will move the task bar back; don’t worry if it doesn’t move as soon as your mouse does, as you drag closer to the bottom of the screen it will jump to dock in the correct place.

office@bluemoonsolutions.es www.bluemoonsolutions.es Mobile: 655 044 970

Office: 902 906 200

Don’t forget you can follow me on twitter @bluemoonspain Alternatively why don’t you sign up for my newsletter. You can do this by going to:www.bluemoonsolutions.es and fill in the form that is on any page except the front page.

Good morning Richard, I have just had an update to Adobe Flash Player version 11.3.300.271 which is causing problems, I have tried to uninstall but it won’t, maybe I have not got an uninstall program for this. If you delete the file in Windows System 32 would this remove it. I have disenabled it in add-ons for the moment.

Hi Ray, probably the best thing to do is to fully remove Adobe Flash player, you can do this easily by downloading and running the uninstaller for flash player, you can find it at this address…

http://download.macromedia.com/get/flashplayer/current/support/uninstall_flash_player.exe …with full instructions on how to use it at… http://helpx.adobe.com/flash-player/kb/uninstall-flash-playerwindows.html#main_Download_the_Adobe_Flash_Player_uninstaller …yes it’s a bit of a long website address, but I assure you that the information on the Adobe site is pretty helpful.

ADVICE: Robbie was having problems with his computer signing out Lately if I am sending e-mails or looking at my favourite’s etc. for no reason the screen goes blank. I then have to click the mouse and fined I have to sign in again in the owner’s box. This happens regular. Would you have a solution? I have Windows XP

Hi Robbie, it sounds like the screen saver is coming on and is set to lock the screen when its interrupted, you can check if this is the case by turning off this functionality, in Windows XP you can do this by right hand clicking the desktop and selecting properties, then click the screen saver box, you will see a tick in the “on resume display Welcome screen”, remove this tick and click OK.

Friday, August 24, 2012

UK HEADLINES

TIA FUNERAL: GRAN BARRED

Daily Telegraph and Daily Mail

Daily Mail

RYANAIR forced a holiday maker to pay more than £200 for a “piece of paper” after she forgot to print her boarding pass. Suzy McLeod forgot to print off the passes for herself and her family for their flight home from Alicante. When Mrs McLeod, 35, arrived at the airport she says she was told she would have to fork out 60 euros per person for her absent-mindedness.

Christine Sharp: Threat to her safety

THE grandmother of murdered schoolgirl Tia Sharp has been warned not to attend the funeral over concerns for her safety. Christine Sharp, 46, is currently on police bail following her arrest over the 12-year-old’s death. And she has already been warned by police not to return to New Addington in South London after Tia’s body was found wrapped in a bed sheet in her loft. Mrs Sharp, who is said to have doted on Tia and spent many weekends looking after her, is currently staying in a secret location and has not been answering her phone. One friend said: “People have told her it’s not a good idea to go to the funeral.” Her former live-in boyfriend Stuart Hazell, 37, has been charged with the murder. Tia’s body could be released to the family following the post mortem, which concluded last week without determining a cause of death. However the funeral could be delayed if Hazell exercises his right to have another pathologist examine the remains. Tia was reported missing on August 3 and police found her body seven days later after a fourth search of Mrs Sharp’s home. Officers apologised to Tia’s mum Natalie, 31, for the delay. Hazell, 37, who appeared via videolink at the Old Bailey on Wednesday, is being held at top security Belmarsh jail. Sharp and her neighbour Paul Meehan, 39‚ held on suspicion of assisting an offender‚ have been bailed by police until October.

Tom and Katie cruise to a quickie divorce

TOM Cruise and Katie Holmes are now officially divorced. The Hollywood couple are legally separated just two months after Katie filed for divorce, a move that left Cruise (pictured on their wedding day) “blindsided”. As celebrity break-ups go, this is a quickie after the couple entered negotiations straight away and last month settled an agreement. Katie will get primary custody of their six-year-old daughter, Suri, and Tom will keep most of his fortune and get visitation rights. Katie and Suri will live in New York while Tom will divide his time between there and his bachelor pad x. SENT :-) u yo on wn do g “I’ll be lookin S in Los Angeles. ER OW FL D AN FROM THE RAINBOW The pair will remain X” . EN AV HE IN E AND SUNSHIN friends for Suri. low ow “H ck: ba Mum Rachel, 27, hit Just ten days after the son and my ing sav d trie I ? can people be split, Katie’s lawyer told US eaking like they are a page is set up sp website TMZ: “This case ssing at mi ll sti is he ht ug him. I’m distra has been settled and the my be to g din ten pre sea. To find someone agreement has been re.” mo n eve me ed oy son has destr signed.

r le d d to d e n w ro d s a s e Troll pos m of the four-yearTHE heartbroken mu ys she has been old lost at sea sa cebook sicko who “destroyed” by a Fa son. pretended to be her Cecil continued, As the hunt for Dylan d the message: “To the Internet troll poste d sisters and sea an my mum my daddy e you all am in lov I ts ren pa side grand all. u heaven waiting on yo

“We are thrilled for Katie

and her family and are excited to watch as she embarks on the next chapter of her life.” He added: “We thank Tom’s counsel for their professionalism and diligence that helped bring about this speedy resolution.” In an email to Reuters, a spokeswoman for Tom confirmed the settlement stating: “It is done.”

Ryanair in ‘piece of paper’ rip-off She says she was left with no choice but to pay the £236 fee so that they “would print out a piece of paper”. Suzy, from Newbury, Berkshire, had visited the Spanish city with her parents and her children Harry and Mary, with whom she is pictured above. She told the Daily Telegraph it had been impossible to print her return flight’s boarding passes as they had gone on holiday for 15 days, and the airline only allows you to print the passes 14 days beforehand. After she had paid for priority seat allocations, baggage fees and the boarding passes, the total amount came to £1,650 - far higher than she had anticipated.

Friday, August 24, 2012

UK HEADLINES

NAKED HARRY A BIG WEB HIT Daily Mirror PHOTOS of party prince Harry NAKED in Las Vegas have been leaked on a US website. The saucy snaps were reportedly taken during a cheeky game of strip billiards at Harry’s VIP hotel suite in Vegas on Friday. Within hours of the photographs emerging online, ‘Prince Harry’ became the number one trending topic on Twitter. Buckingham Palace confirmed on Wedbesday morning that the man in the pictures is Prince Harry. The embarrassing incident will no doubt raise questions about the Prince’s security arrangements during his stay in Las Vegas. It also emerged that Harry partied with US swimmer Ryan Lochte at the weekend - even challenging the Olympic gold medallist to a swim off. The boys donned their swimming trunks for a pool party at the exclusive XS Nightclub, a 60,000-square foot tropical haven with three tiered pools and palm trees. And revellers at the Encore THE family of Tony Scott, who leapt to his hotel complex went wild when death from a Los Angeles bridge, deny he Harry and 28-year-old Ryan was suffering inoperable brain cancer. lined up to race each other. The Top Gun director jumped off the The nude photos scandal is Vincent Thomas another blow to the young royBridge on Sunday in als’ privacy. what is being investiLast month, an Australian gated as a suicide. magazine sparked fury by Initial reports in the publishing pictures of Kate US claimed the 68Middleton in a bikini while on year-old had been trying to spare his family honeymoon. the pain of watching Oz tabloid Woman’s Day his slow death after a printed photographs of the terminal diagnosis. Duke and Duchess of But the LA Times said family members Cambridge during their romantic stay in the have denied the reports to the county Seychelles on its front cover. coroner’s office, which had yet to deter-

Scott suicide jump not due to tumour The Sun mine whether Scott had any health problems. Website TMZ said Scott’s wife Donna had told authorities that the claims were “absolutely false”. It came as his brother, Sir Ridley Scott, halted work on his new blockbuster. The Prometheus director was in London filming The Counselor when his younger sibling died. Ridley halted filming and flew to Hollywood, to comfort his sister-in-law, and twin nephews, Frank and Max. His movie, starring Brad Pitt and Cameron Diaz, is on hold until further notice.

TONY NICKLINSON, the locked-in syndrome sufferer who went to the High Court to fight for a doctor to be allowed to help end his life, died on Wednesday - just six days after losing the case. His lawyers said he had been refusing food since the verdict, but contracted pneumonia and "went rapidly downhill last

Tragic Tony finds a way weekend". His lawyer, Saimo Chahal of Bindmans, said Nicklinson's wife, Jane, told her after the draft judgment was handed down on August 12 that "the fight seemed to go out of him"

Friday, August 24, 2012

It’s official, Jill from MABS is a big loser

BEFORE: Jill with group leader Gail (left)

MABS Murcia Care Co-ordinator Jill Chorley has been named Slimmer of the Year by Sunshine Slimmers. The slimming group meets at MABS San Javier centre and Jill has been a member since the first meeting in June 2011. Jill, pictured left with Group leader Gail Grainger, has lost an amazing 4st 11lbs (25Kg) in the 12 months since the photo was taken. Sunshine Slimmers meets every Friday from 11am until noon in the meeting room of the new MABS furniture store. For €5 a week the club can help people achieve their weight loss goals. And Sunshine Slimmers

AFTER: Slimline Jill - 4st 11lb lighter

donates one euro from every weekly fee to MABS. In the past year, Sunshine Slimmers members have lost a total of 35 stone (more than 222kg) – that’s more than three ten-stone people. They have also donated more than €350 to MABS. Their eating plan is easy to follow and has great results. It offers flexibility and choice. You can fill up on healthy, everyday foods that the whole family can enjoy and you don’t need to go hungry. Call Gail on 86 81 86 020 or go along to the first post-summer meeting on September 7 at 11am.

THE FLAG FOOLS

Lifeguards despair of holidaymakers who ignore beach danger warnings The autonomous community had to foot this bill, but the THE Murcian coast’s 232 lifeguards are all welltrained - but nothing can prepare them for the biggest cost was that the bather drowned after managing to pull the five youngsters out of the water. One of them was irresponsibility of some holidaymakers.

Triple tops: Elvis 2000, Rupert and Fiona McLean

King has left the Costa A FANTASTIC tour featuring two of the best Elvis tribute artists seen on the Costa Blanca came to a close on Sunday with a sell-out crowd at The Rendezvous in Campoamor. Peter Day from tour promoters Jukebox Promotions said: “We had to turn away people for the last show as it was completely full. “The tour was a great success at all venues but Sunday was absolutely buzzing and a great way to

mark the 35th anniversary of Elvis’s death. “Without doubt, Elvis 2000 and Rupert (the UK’s original Elvis tribute from the late 60s) are the best Elvis acts seen on the Costas in years, and there are plans to bring back the show in 2013.” Don’t forget, the Cliff & Elvis Spectacular tour is coming in September so check out the venues and dates at www.jukeboxpromotions.co.uk

The high number of people who defy danger warnings, ignore red flags and risk lives (not only their own), is something they find it hard to come to terms with. In the La Manga area, rescue workers have performed 1,173 interventions and 14,710 first aid interventions so far this summer. Generally, throughout the summer the green flag goes up, indicating ideal conditions, with waves less than 20cm high. When the yellow flag is raised they try to find areas along each beach where it is safer to swim, and indicate those areas where swimming is not recommended. However, bathers often believe they are immune to danger, and ignore the warnings. This was the case with one father, who decided to have a swim where the yellow flag was flying. He was not alone, there were five youngsters who also ignored the warning at Calblanque beach this summer. The 44-year-old and the youngsters couldn’t swim ashore due to the strong currents, and it took rescue workers 15 minutes to reach the area, as Calblanque (near La Manga) has no lifeguards. A jet ski zoomed to the area (at a cost of €41 an hour), a lifeboat set off (€65), a helicopter approached (€3,034 to take off and €354 an hour) and a rescue crew (€97 an hour).

GET IN HARMONY WITH VELVETONES

THE Velvetones Harmony Chorus starts rehearsals after the summer break on September 5. The ladies, who come from the UK, Ireland, Sweden and New Zealand, meet every Wednesday, 10 am - 1 pm, at the restaurant El Paraiso, Jardin del Mar 1, near Carrefour in Torrevieja. The chorus has a repertoire of songs in English from barbershop to musicals and Anything Goes, which will be per- entertains audiences at conTHE Hog Roast planned formed at the San Miguel Theatre in certs and sing-outs in aid of for 9 September at late October. Tickets and more local charities. Vintage in San Javier has Haven’t sung for years? No unfortunately had to be information from Colin Nelson 966 matter, you’ll soon feel at cancelled. 774 127. Pictured are chorus girls Jan home on the risers, members Anyone who has bought tickets for the Holden and Helen Lloyd with RBL promise. Drop in for a cup of coffee event should go to the branch chairman Keith Carter. and see them in action or con- MABS Centre in San For more information on the tact musical director Judith on Orihuela Costa and District Branch 634 363 556 or chairwoman Javier or call 615 016 035 to arrange a refund. visit www.orihuelacostarbl.com June on 965 327 446.

Chorus of approval for RBL MEMBERS of The Campoverde Theatre Group presented a cheque for €250 to the Orihuela Costa and District Branch of The Royal British Legion. Theatre group members joined the Legion at its monthly meeting at the Olympia restaurant in Mil Palmeras to hand over the cheque. The Compoverde Theatre Group’s next production is

his son, who then watched his father disappear beneath the waves. The rescue workers then risked life and limb to pull the body out of the water. One of the lifeguards fell into the waves during the operation and had to be resued by the rest of the crew. The €22,000 jet ski was written off after being smashed against the cliffs during the rescue. The recommendation if you find yourself being pulled out to sea by a strong current, is to let the current take you, so you don’t tire yourself out fighting against the tide. Then start swimming sideways until the lifeguards can reach you.

Gone to the Hogs

Friday, August 24, 2012

SPANISH NEWS

Merry men march for utopian dream tion among Andalucía’s poor. A number of those involved in the raid are facing criminal charges, while Gordillo - who has immunity because he holds political office - is capitalising on the high-profile Juan Manuel Sánchez Gordillo, mayor of looting with a series of marchMarinaleda, Seville, hit headlines worldwide es across Andalucía. Decked out in his trademark when two weeks ago he joined the Andalucian Union of Workers to take goods from Keffiyeh, Palestinian scarf, and Carrefour and Mercadona stores for distribu- to chants of “workers united to dream is not just talk. The fight unemployment”, Gordillo on the backs of workers”. He added: “We believe in mayor and his small town set off from Jódar last Utopia, we do not believe in have been living the commuThursday with around 400 capitalism, we are to abolish nist ideal since the seventies. farm labourers. Elected in 1979 as the first private ownership of the Marchers waved the flags mayor of the town after the fall means of production.” of Cuba and the Communist Gordillo’s actions have of Franco, Gordillo has Party as well as a banner with divided Spain with many view- remained in office ever since. VICTIMS of ETA, the Basque separatist group, have con- the image of ArgentinIan revo- ing him as an irresponsible He and the townsfolk have demned moves to release a jailed member of the group lutionary Che Guevara. trouble maker; a menace at a reorganised Marinaleda on They reached Jaen on time when Spain is struggling communist lines - working the on health grounds, claiming it would set a dangerous precedent. Saturday where, surrounded against economic collapse. land as a cooperative, refusJosu Uribetxeberria Bolinaga (pictured) and several by police, they held a sit-in at But others have hailed him the ing a police force and jointly supporters are in their second week of hunger strike the city’s Corte Ingles store, to hero whose thinking can lead building homes that come with demanding that he be released from jail because he is them a symbol of the capitalist Spain out of its mess. mortgages of €15 a month dying from cancer. society they abhor. It is mostly the young who and can’t be sold for profit. But victims groups have reacted furiously, questioning Then, outside the govern- support Gordillo. A recent TV Gordillo and his band of whether he is really close to death and maintaining that ment buildings Gordillo called poll showed 90 per cent of his merry marchers are going on he should, in any case, be left to die for “disobedience” against the supporters are under 30. to Cordoba, Cadiz and behind bars. cuts “because they are made But Gordillo’s utopian Granada. Consuelo Ordóñez, of victims’ collective Covite and sister of Basque PP leader Gregorio Ordóñez, who was murdered by ETA in 1995, said: “For us the ideal A WOMAN has successfully sued a hospital with nerve damage and joint problems ever would be that Josu Uribetxeberria after undergoing surgery intended for her since. dies of metastases, if he actually room-mate. It wasn’t until they checked the notes that has this illness, in jail.” And, incredibly, the following day a nurse staff realised they had treated the wrong Uribetxeberria has served half of tried to give her a second procedure also patient. a 30 year sentence for two kidnapmeant for the patient sharing her room. When two days later a nurse tried to give pings and several ETA killings. The blunders happened at the hospital in the same patient an enema with no medical He was involved in the 1996 kidnapping of prison offiAlcoy, where the woman underwent an explanation, she refused. cer José Antonio Ortega Lara. After 532 days as a capunnecessary - and botched - surgical proceThe nurse checked and again found the tive, Ortega’s emaciated appearance, described as like dure to fit a catheter. procedure was intended for the other woman something out of a Nazi concentration camp, shocked The patient was under observation for in the room. the nation. intestinal problems when she was whisked to The patient took legal action against the Police had not found Ortega when Uribetxeberria was her through fitted catheter the have to theatre Hospital Virgen de los Lirios, calling for a total arrested, and when interrogated by magistrate Baltasar settlement of 150,000 euros. She was awardGarzón, currently defending Wikileaks’ Julian Assange, main artery, accessed via her left shoulder. The procedure failed and she has been left ed compensation of 30,000 euros. Uribetxeberria refused to reveal Ortega’s location.

THE Spanish mayor dubbed Robin Hood after his recent steal from the rich, give to the poor raid on supermarkets is leading ‘workers’ on a march across Andalucía to protest government cuts.

Leave ETA terrorist in jail to die, say victims

Wrong patient gets surgery

Bailout is inevitable admits top PP official MADRID mayor Ana week last Botella became the first high ranking official in Spain to publicly state the country will need funds from Brussels. The PP politician and wife of former Spanish prime minister José Maria Aznar said the “seemed bailout inevitable.” She told Spanish news agency Europa Press: “There’s no doubt about it. It’s very probable that we’re going to have to ask for the from help European Union.”

Other top government officials, including prime minister Mariano Rajoy, have long insisted the country will not require a bailout. However, recently this stance appears to have softened somewhat, with Rajoy stating he would not take a decision on whether to apply for a new aid package, on top of a €100bn loan for the country’s banks, until he knew what condibe would tions attached.

Friday, August 24, 2012

SPANISH NEWS

BUSTED: VOODOO SEX SLAVE GANG

Air crash could be repeated pilots warn

NATIONAL Police agents have arrested nine people belonging to an organisation that used voodoo to force women into prostitution.

THE president of the Spanish Union of Airline Pilots (Sepla) warned on Monday that the chain of errors that caused a The Nigerian victims were lured to Spain by a fellow counBoeing MD-82 to crash four trywoman with promises of work and a new life. years ago, leaving 154 dead, But once in the country they were forced into the sex trade, could be repeated. with voodoo threats used to convince them that if they didn’t “It could cause the same failsubmit they would suffer “death of the soul”. ure and the same type of acciThe gang’s heinous practices were uncovered after police dent,” said Javier Martinez de and border control officials became suspicious of a Nigerian Velasco during the commemowoman making frequent trips between the two countries, ration of the fourth anniversary always accompanied on her return to Spain by young women. of the Spanair tragedy. Investigations revealed that the women were handed over Pilar Vera, president of the to two men who put them to work as sex slaves on streets Association of Flight JK 5022 and industrial estates in various Spanish cities. Affected, has called for the The victims were forced to work off their passage, which investigation to be reopened, the gang paid for, and then controlled through voodoo ritual saying “we will learn more and other threats. than you ever dreamed”. Voodoo customs are firmly rooted in Nigerian society, so In response, development the women were easily manipulated, living in fear of acci- Trance party: West African voodoo worshippers dance as they minister Ana Pastor dents or the worst voodoo curse the loss of the soul. announced that her departperform sacred rites on the beach Five gang members were arrested in Málaga and four in ment is working on new Barcelona when police swooped. rules to enhance aviation The gang was also found to be counterfeiting documents safety and is increasing and arranging sham marriages and bogus work contracts. the number of members of Raids at three homes in Málaga and Igualada, Barcelona the investigation commisled to the seizure of 2,200 euros in cash, forged documents sion to improve its funcand items for holding voodoo rituals. tioning. The investigation was based on information from the And, she said, safety Immigration and Borders Interior Attaché at the Spanish officials of the State Safety Embassy in Nigeria. AN internet campaign urging people to occupy Parliament next month suffered a setback after Programme will become The operation was carried out by the Central Brigade being slammed by some of the main groups in the 15-M protest movement. more proactive, seeking to Immigration Network General Commissariat for Immigration Plataforma ¡En Pie!, which has almost 40,000 supporters on Facebook, is calling for people uncover potential proband Border Brigade in collaboration with the provincial to occupy Parliament on September 25 and not to leave until the PP Government is ousted. lems before they happen. Brigades of Málaga and Barcelona. The Occupy Parliament campaign states its objecPreviously the model tives as the “resignation of the entire Government, the was reactive, only investidissolution of the Parliament and the Head of State and gating after the event. the opening of a transparent and democratic constituent Vera has said she is process to draft a new constitution”. ed to treat pleased with action taken toward 417 drugs us ing yth an , ns are vei te But the General Assembly of Sol, one of the main 15as varicose acists in Alican mmon ailments such DOCTORS and pharm M groups, has said it does not agree with the agenda. by the Ministry of Justice refusing drugs co diarrhoea. or are hs nts ug tie co , pa t ids tha ho orr em ha reporting ce pre lian w mp ne co And the association Democracia Real Ya! (DRY) has that has changed the stams with afford to pay “There will be proble because they can’t tus of victims of air disasthese of me branded the campaign “irresponsible”. so se cau be with the treatment scription charges. re ipthe ters, who are now given scr d an pre ce ros eu sin In a statement to news agency Europa Press, DRY ening more than 30 This has been happ health drugs cost y,” says said that while it does not consider the government the same recognition and pa the t t bu no 1, can ly o Ju wh on tion costs went up t will be patients t of the Valencian “legitimate” because it failed to keep election promises, protection as victims of the problem will ge rlos Fluixá, presiden Ca professionals warn . er eth og alt ps ding sto d Community Medicine it believes that “forcing it out without having a defined terrorism and natural disSociety of Family an worse when public fun 1. er mb pte Se on asters. gs project [for the future] does not make sense. for many popular dru will no longer pay t en rtm The draft will be ready pa “We need a more thorough and meticulous study, and de h alt he The real concrete alternatives,” DRY asserts. by the end of the year.

Anti-cuts groups say no to Parliament invasion

a pill r te it b o to e v ro p ts s o c Drug

Friday,December August 24, 2012 Friday, 16, 2011

Watch where DON’T TALK you’re going AND DRIVE!

DIRECT LINE has released the results of a study which found that 60 per cent of men admitted being distracted by attractive women while 12 per cent of women said they did the same when passing an attractive man. Within the total UK figure of 922,000 distraction-related crashes per year, there are more cases of cars crashing into the vehicle in front during the summer than the winter, because more lightly-clad pedestrians prove more of a distraction. 21 per cent of drivers said that advertising billboards featuring beautiful models were also a major distraction on the road. As an aside, we wonder if anyone in the USA has ever tried to sue the company that put up the billboard for causing a distraction? Mad, but entirely possible. Matt Owen from Direct Line said: "Stealing a quick look at an attractive pedestrian or billboard model may well be a bit of fun but, on a serious note, drivers shouldn't underestimate that this type of distraction is a major contributing factor in road accidents. "The number of crashes caused in this

way have not changed year on year so drivers obviously are not learning to keep their eyes on the road." The worst-case scenario reported was where a driver was distracted by an attractive pedestrian and crashed – while their partner was in the passenger seat. Thus a two-second lapse can lead to loss of noclaims bonus, loss of car, loss of furious partner and a probable contempt from the object of desire on the pavement. That really is a bad day.

FORD has developed a system that can work out when it is an especially bad time to take use an in-car phone and block the call temporarily. The idea is that if, say, you are coming down a slip road and about to join a busy motorway, you don't want to be answering a call while trying to simultaneously look in your mirrors. A Ford spokesman said, "We're researching ways to use the car's own intelligence to further help drivers. Vehicle control inputs, sensors, road conditions and biometric information such as a driver's pulse and breathing can all be used to create a driver workload estimation." Basically, that means the FOR those of you who have not yet heard the good news - FC Rentacar have expanded to open new offices in La Regia, Orihuela Costa and Torrevieja centre near Habaneras shopping centre. There is sure to be an office near you, as we have offices in Gran Alacant, Torrevieja Costa, Torrevieja centre, La Regia, Villamartin and Camposol, and of course our office in La Marina Urbanisation where we started in 1993 ! We also operate from Alicante & Murcia airports, and in the near future, the new airport based at Corvera. We believe that having local offices, in addition to our dedicated reservations team, and internet booking system, enables us to provide a very flexible and personal service. The level of our returning customers is testament to the quality of service that we provide to our clients. We are very excited to announce that not only do we offer car rental but we now offer van rental to our clients which is ideal for house moves within Spain. We intend to expand our fleet of

system would calculate how hard the car is working, how stressed the driver is, and how busy the road conditions are, before allowing the phone to receive a call. A lot of the required sensors are already available – for example the Blind Spot Information System already detects traffic approaching the rear of the car, and traction control and ABS system continually monitor the behaviour of the vehicle. The only new area would be measuring driver biometrics. This would be done via sensors in the steering wheel to get information about heartrate – like the metal pads in some gym equipment. Adding a sensor in the seatbelt would

vans so there is a size to suit all needs. Moreover we are constantly increasing our range of models to offer more choice to our clients. We have recently purchased diesel vehicles (Chevrolet Aveo 5 doors and Chevrolet Orlando 7 seater) and automatic models (Chevrolet Aveo), so there is a car to suit all needs in our fleet which ranges from small economy cars, automatic models to larger vehicles with 7 or 9 seats. For those of you wishing to purchase your own vehicle, we always have quality ex rental cars for sale with transfer of ownership included. FC continue to be very competitive on price, in addition to our already low prices, we are currently offering fantastic early booking discounts as well as regular client discounts and new client discounts starting in October. So

enable measurement of breathing and a final sensor would compare ambient temperature in the cabin to the driver's temperature to check if the driver is getting hot and bothered. At present, it is only a prototype, but one can see the value in the idea.

book early to get the best possible price. You won’t be disappointed! Avoid hidden costs at the airport, because the price we quote to you, is the price that you will pay on arrival. We do not use comparison web-sites, as we believe in providing an honest up-front price to our clients. The flexibility of the company also allows you to pick up and drop off your hire car at any of our locations with no charge for different location drop-off. The company boasts friendly, helpful and professional staff whose languages include Spanish, English, German, French and Dutch. Office opening hours are MondayFriday 09:30-14:15 and 17:00-19:30 and Saturdays 09:3014:15.Our airport service operates 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Booking a car with FC is easy, it can be done in person at one of the offices, by phone, fax or email to info@fcrentacar.com but the most popular way to reserve your car is through the website www.fcrentacar.com or to call our reservations team on 966 796 044.

Friday, August 24, 2012

CODE CRACKER Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues; instead, every letter of the alphabet has been replaced by a number, the same number representing the same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have to do is decide which letter is represented by which number. In this week’s puzzle, 17 represents L and 9 represents Q, when these letters have been entered throughout the puzzle, you should have enough information to start guessing words and discovering other letters.

QUICKIE

Across 1 Stockpile (7) 5 Turned to ice (5) 8 Lockjaw (7) 9 Capital of Egypt (5) 10 Vast multitude (5) 11 State of elated bliss (7) 12 Military greeting (6) 14 Hydrophobia (6) 17 Put into a proper order (7) 19 Go get (5) 22 Twit (5) 23 Small and of little importance (7) 24 Regal (5) 25 Knives, forks and spoons (7)

Down 1 Bungle (5) 2 Supply food (5) 3 Not strict (7) 4 Seal (6) 5 Concentration (5) 6 Japanese art of paper folding (7) 7 Names derived from a person (7) 12 Disperse (7) 13 Theft (7) 15 Trouble (7) 16 Feverish (6) 18 Asian country (5) 20 Rubbish (5) 21 Christmas plant (5)

Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Pastoral, 7 Shake, 8 Gladstone, 9 Boa, 10 Nail, 11 Genius, 13 Cravat, 14 Caress, 17 Beckon, 18 Limb, 20 Par, 22 Salvation, 23 Chaos, 24 Feckless. Down: 1 Pagan, 2 Stamina, 3 Oust, 4 Apogee, 5 Daubs, 6 Remains, 7 Seminar, 12 Carcass, 13 Compact, 15 Edifice, 16 Collie, 17 Break, 19 Bonus, 21 Back

Scribble Pad

DOUBLE CROSS-WORD Solve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

CRYTPIC CLUES Across 7 Prohibit a North American fruit (6) 8 Sent as disguised approval (6) 9 Hung on to oddly keen pet (4) 10 Constituent of the air that produces retoning (8) 11 Plots get revolutionary leader in a terrible mess (7) 13 Opted out of storage facility (5) 15 Sack the Spanish roll (5) 17 Left Dave and his cat in a bad way (7) 20 Within the fold, it will grow (8) 21 Weak camel lost its head, sadly (4) 23 It's dead simple if Alec goes off (6) 24 Reluctant to produce a piece of poetry (6)

Down 1 Caused to be insane before the end of June (4) 2 Upset baby's plaything (6) 3 Overawed by undated characters (7) 4 Moves quickly for the board game (5) 5 On land with fire residue and mining product (6) 6 Animal or insect run away (8) 12 Rebuild winch as a cutter (8) 14 Alter the French on the side (7) 16 Insect that can be found in, or near, Wigan (6) 18 Associates that the gangster misrepresents (6) 19 I leave waiter to get the melted ice (5) 22 Fail to spot the young woman (4)

STANDARD CLUES

Down

Across

1 Constructed (4) 2 Child's toy (6) 3 Intimidated (7) 4 Pub game (5) 5 On the beach (6) 6 Deer-like ruminant (8) 12 Mechanical power-driven cutting tool (8) 14 Sideways (7) 16 Listen in (6) 18 Friends (6) 19 H2O (5) 22 Fail to hit (4)

7 Yellow fruit (6) 8 Agree (6) 9 Retained (4) 10 Common non-metallic element (8) 11 Strategies (7) 13 Storehouse (5) 15 Dense bread roll (5) 17 Abandoned (7) 20 Become greater (8) 21 Hobbling (4) 23 Shallow (6) 24 Reluctant (6) Last weeks Solution Across: 1 Apse, 3 Massacre, 9 Reading, 10 Otter, 11 Cheap, 12 Silver, 14 Topper, 16 Impede, 19 Goatee, 21 Regal, 24 Edict, 25 Acacias, 26 Mastered, 27 Zeus. Down: 1 Apricots, 2 Snare, 4 August, 5 Scowl, 6 Catseye, 7 Ears, 8 Simple, 13 Recluses, 15 Profits, 17 Morgan, 18 Beware, 20 Tithe, 22 Gripe, 23 Germ.

FILL IT IN

Complete the crossword grid by using the given words:

2 letter words Me On 3 letter words Beg Dip Egg Era Eve Ewe Son Use 4 letter words Abet Ages Alms Bode Dame Dine Ewer Ghee Glow Gnat

Gyps Halo Hare Idea Joke Lure Ogre Once Ores Pall Pert Plug Reed Rote Rune Slot Test Tint Tire Tsar Wean Yang

Scrum 5 letter words Sneer Alien Tests Alive Those Basis Wages Bated Wives Calms 6 letter words Carat Arrest Caved Balboa Chars Baleen Circa Comedy Colon Corset Irate Grille Jaded Shares Lager Stigma Liner 8 letter words Needy Cosmetic Oasis Deranged Oiled 9 letter words Owned Eiderdown Pitta Enunciate Poker Poses Sales

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORD Improve your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers in English or vice versa.

Across

Down

1 Foot (3) 3 Ribbon (5) 6 Alquitrán (3) 8 To suck in (air or dust) (7) 9 Ajedrez (5) 10 Behind (at the back) (5) 11 Otro (en singular) (7) 12 Pirata (6) 14 Tin (ore) (6) 17 Towels (7) 19 Especia (5) 21 Late (after usual time) (5) 22 En contra de (7) 23 South (3) 24 Árboles (5) 25 Un (3)

1 Silver (metal) (5) 2 Emperador (7) 3 Faces (5) 4 Noruega (6) 5 Anchovies (salted, tinned) (7) 6 Dientes (5) 7 Rosary (7) 12 Ducklings (7) 13 El más alto (7) 15 Breath (respiration) (7) 16 Fuga (6) 18 To open (5) 19 Costuras (puntadas) (5) 20 Between (5)

Friday, August 24, 2012 Across 1 Which 1963 World War II film, based on a book by Paul Brickhill, starred James Garner, Steve McQueen, Richard Attenborough and Donald Pleasance? (5,6) 7 Which verb means to ‘state or say further’? (3) 9 Fables such as The Fox and the Grapes, The Tortoise and the Hare and The Shepherd Boy and the Wolf are all accredited to which Greek slave who lived from about 620 to 560 BC? (5) 10 Which American writer and humourist is best known for his novels about Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn? (4,5) 11 Which British rock music vocalist is best known as the lead singer of legendary rock band Deep Purple, and for his two-year stint in Black Sabbath? (3,6) 12 Round wire, cut or clasp, oval wire, masonry and lost head are all types of which metal fasteners? (5) 13 Which state of great inner peace is the culmina-

tion of the pursuit of liberation in Hinduism, Buddhism, Sikhism and Jainism? (7) 15/18 Who was the author of the best-selling novel Exodus, which dealt with the struggle to establish and defend the state of Israel, first published in 1958? (4,4) 20 According to Greek mythology, who was the first woman, fashioned by Zeus as part of the punishment of mankind for Prometheus’ theft of the secret of fire? (7) 23 Which smooth thinwalled nut in a woody cupshaped base is the fruit of the oak tree? (5) 24 From the Greek for ‘overseer’, which adjective means ‘denoting or governed by or relating to a bishop or bishops’? (9) 26 Which ancient Athenian philosopher, a student of Plato and teacher of Alexander the Great, wrote books on many subjects, including physics, poetry, zoology, logic, rhetoric, government, and biology? (9) 27 Which word means ‘morally pure’ or ‘not written

SUDOKU

Quiz Word

or printed on’? (5) 28 What name is normally applied to the land force of the military? (3) 29 Which tight-fitting hat

with visors front and back is often associated with Sherlock Holmes? (11)

Down 1 Which word is commonly used to describe the measure of the slope of a straight line? (8) 2 Which city in eastern Denmark is best known as the setting of Shakespeare’s Hamlet? (8) 3 By what nickname was the actress Nathalie Hedren, who appeared in Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds and Marnie, usually known? (5) 4 Mogadishu is the capital of which republic in extreme eastern Africa? (7) 5 What is the name of the triangle-shaped endocrine glands that sit atop the kidneys? (7) 6 Reginald Kenneth Dwight is the real name of which British singer/songwriter? (5,4) 7 In musical tempo markings, which word indicates the piece is to be played ‘slowly’ [but not as slow as largo]? (6) 8 What nationality were physicist Niels Bohr, writer Hans Christian Andersen and former footballer Allan

Simonsen? (6) 14 Somerset Park is the home ground of which Scottish football club? (3,6) 16 What name is given to a exposed partial weather platform on the stern superstructure of a ship? (4,4) 17 William who was the Nobel Prize-winning writer whose novels includes The Sound and the Fury, As I Lay Dying, Light in August, The Unvanquished and Absalom, Absalom? (8) 19 What is the name of the ornamental staff held by a ruling monarch? (7) 20 What was the first name of the American showman, Barnum founder of the famous circus that bears his name? (7) 21 What is the capital of Cuba? (6) 22 What name is given to line of argument rationalising the course of action of a government? (6) 25 What is the name of the dried and partially fermented fatty seed of the tree from which chocolate is made? (5)

SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH Animales del mar

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

el caballo de mar

la almeja

el calamar

la ballena

el cangrejo

la concha

el coral

la foca

el delfín

la gaviota

el pelicano

la langosta

el pez

la medusa

el pulpo

las algas

music QUIZ

ANSWERS: 1. Jude 2. USA For Africa 3. Tony Parsons & Julie Burchill 4. M People 5. Olivia Newton John 6. Slippery When Wet 7. Crowded House 8. Snap 9. Some Type Of Flight Suits 10. Ireland 11. Loveshack (B52's) 12. Bruce Willis

Last Week’s Solutions Code Cracker Last weeks Quiz Wordsolution Across: 1 Skids, 4 Bricks, 9 Alabama, 10 Minim, 11 Icon, 12 Annuals, 13/17 Mel Brooks, 14 Apia, 16 Agra, 18 Ian, 20 Rangers, 21 Java, 24 Orion, 25 Avocado, 26 Sonata, 27 Gross. Down: 1 Static, 2 Imago, 3 Slag, 5 Romanian, 6 Centaur, 7 Samosa, 8 Halal, 13 Max Ernst, 15 Pension, 18 Isaac, 19 Majors, 22 Alamo, 23 Gong.

el tiburón Empareja estas palabras para animales - Match the Spanish and English animal words You will find the answers at the bottom of the quiz. 1.la medusa,

15.el pez, 16.el pelicano,

k.the lobster, l.the dolphin,

2.el caballo de mar, 3.el tiburón,

17.las algas, 18.el calamar.

m.the octopus, n.the squid,

4.la ballena,

o.the shark, p.the clam,

5.la estrella del mar, 6.el delfín,

a.the fish, b.the sea-weed,

7.la gaviota, 8.el cangrejo,

c.the shell, d.the whale,

9.la langosta, 10.el coral,

e.the seagull, f.the sea-horse,

11.la foca, 12.el pulpo,

g.the pelican, h.the jellyfish,

13.la concha, 14.la almeja,

i.the crab, j.the coral,

Soduko

Span - Eng

Quizword

q.the seal, r.the starfish.

Answers: 1h, 2f, 3o, 4d, 5r, 6l, 7e, 8i, 9k, 10j, 11q, 12m, 13c, 14p, 15a, 16g, 17b, 18n

1. What Name Appears In The Title Of Both A Beatles Hit And A Novel By ThomasHardy? 2. What Was The Name Of The Supergroup That Had A Hit With 'We Are The World'? 3. Which Two Journalists Co Wrote The Book 'The Boy Looked At Johnny' The Orbituary Of Rock & Roll? 4. Which Major 90's Dance Act Was Fronted By Heather Small? 5. Which Future Star Once Won A Hayley Mills Lookalike Contest? 6. Which Bon Jovi album was best kept dry? 7. Members Of The Band 'Split Enz' Went On To Form Which Famous Band? 8. Who Had A Massive 90's Hit With Rhythm Is A Dancer? 9. What Clothing Are The 2 Figures Wearing On The 1978 Black Sabbath Album Cover 'Never Say Die'? 10. Which Country Did The Bachelors Come From? 11. Which Hit Features The Line 'Hop In My Chrysler It's As Big As A Whale And It's About To Set Sale '? 12. The Single 'Respect Yourself' Was Released By Which Die Hard Music Lover?

Fill It In

Friday, August 24, 2012

TRELI ON THE TELLY with ALEX TRELINSKI THERE was no messing from ITV1 last Saturday night following their biggest-ever ratings disaster due to the Olympics after not even bothering to put out anything worthwhile during July. In the old days, September would see the start of the new season, but the commercial channel came out all guns blazing a fortnight early to mixed results, whilst BBC1 was clearly keeping its powder dry. The Beeb schedule was so uninspiring that a potential asylum seeker would have had more laughs watching Ecuadorian TV in a London embassy. Admittedly most of ITV’s schedule was brought to you by Simon Cowell, with The X Factor circus rolling back into town, and a re-vamp of his tedious Red or Black show, which even Ant and Dec

The Cowell and the pussy cats

couldn’t rescue from being a flop last year. It shows how much ITV need Cowell to stay with them, that they decided to give Red or Black a second go. If it had been anybody else, it would have been junked as quickly as big Mary making a move on a man in Corrie! The revamped version is cer-

tainly better, wrapped around as a recorded sandwich with The X Factor as the meat in the middle. It’s a lot tighter, and we are just down to a handful of contestants chasing half a million quid in a show that is now totally studio based. After getting the canned audience hysteria every time Ant and Dec mentioned the bigmoney prize (perhaps the effects were recorded at a Hitler

rally), the tasks were actually quite entertaining. Like the two big guys smashing through windows and a spelling contest between Carol Vorderman and Jonathan Ross, though I wasn’t convinced that Carol didn’t know the final word! We were given loads of chatter with the contenders, and that’s where the problem, like last year, still lies. I’m just not bothered. Except for the very end with “The Vortex”, where the lady just happened to win all the money on the very first show (cough cough), I wasn’t soiling myself with excitement. In a format which is all about luck, I think such riches are totally undeserved. If you want tension, then just watch Millionaire and Chris Tarrant putting the contestants through the old ringer. You deserve every penny you get on that show, whilst the main

Horoscopes Aries March 21 - April 19 Beware any Oscar Wilde inspired, Saturn encouraged, moments of wisdom attempts this week that you might try to pass off as your own. Beware in particular these actual words or any form of derivative thereof: "I have nothing to declare but my genius", "the only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about" and "a handbag?"

Taurus April 20 - May 20 Meeting people while you are out walking your dog near the local graveyard is set to become 5% more sinister than usual this week, especially if they still haven't fixed the lights yet, thunder and lightning is cracking in the near distance, and the sound of a church organ is playing morbid tunes.

Gemini May 21 - June 20 Walking with your chin up and shoulders back but not looking where your feet are treading, has a 1 in 10 chance of upturned drawing pin stickage into your shoe this week in any classroom scene. To shave or not to shave? will be a question you will have to confront in some sort of hair or follicle over achievement situation.

Cancer June 21 - July 22 Eating and drinking on roller coasters, especially the ones that flip you upside down no more than three times in a minute are well starred, with chocolate milk being the planets' preference. 'Sublime', 'delicate' and 'exquisite' are three words set to pepper a futile attempt at literary or musical criticism this week.

failing of Red or Black is still the fact it’s largely all down to luck, and also a major misread by Simon Cowell that viewers love to see loads of money being won whatever the circumstances. Wrong! So many viewers hated the show last year, they weren’t prepared to come back for a second bite this time round, according to the ratings. As Dads’ Army’s Private Frazer would say, the show is “doomed” - and there’s nothing that Cowell or even God Almighty can do about it! There was something really wrong with Saturday’s X Factor opener. We had a judge that really called it as it was, but unfortunately Scary Spice….Mel B, was only on as a guest for the Manchester auditions. There was no messing as she dumped big time on a load of the dross, and even on some of the decent acts. It was an

action packed starter, with the biggest nutter I’ve ever seen on the show, called Zoe, who was as sweet as cutie pie when she first popped up, then became the latest cast member for The Walking Dead. And to remind us that it is a singing contest, we had a lad from Asda belting out At Last and a 16-yearold with a self-penned song about her grandad. It’s TV theatre of the highest order, and I wish some of the critics and viewers would stop treating it so seriously. I still miss Simon Cowell on it, though. I’ve been a big Jonathan Ross fan since his days on Channel Four in the 80s; he’s one BBC person who has managed a successful move to ITV. His return on Saturday night had him bang on form, and he and his team knew that we wanted Olympians - and Olympians we got, led by Usain Bolt. There were so many guests that perhaps we didn’t get enough from each of them, but you couldn’t accuse Jonathan and the whole product of being boring, which was good enough for me. By the way, it got a lot more viewers than poor old Red or Black.

By Pandora Leo July 23 - August 22 Chasing things is much better starred than usual this week, with a 0.7% better chance than normal of you catching what you are running after. Doctors who like nothing better than practical jokes with their patients should be avoided until well after Halloween. This week your destiny has bought a Kiss Me Quick hat.

Virgo August 23 - September 22 Horatio, Ernest and Theodore are your names from ages past set to have an impact this week in some sort of spooky, supernatural, 'Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum' kind of way. You will have an idea for a new sit com pop into your brain involving a family this week. Your destiny has finally fixed the roof rack to the car and is ready to get beach bound.

Libra September 23 - October 22 Chuckles are set to pepper the weekas never before, or that might be hiccups, it's difficult to read Libra's chart this week. (Libra has become the most difficult star sign to predict, with the result that Libra horoscopes in all media outlets throughout the world are less accurate than usual. This is due to sun spots on Saturn.)

Scorpio October 23 - November 21 Common houseflies, medium sized spiders, and those flying thingies with the really long legs, are all well starred in any alfresco food preparation situations or when you have a vacuum cleaner nozzle in your hand ready to suck them up. destiny needs reassurance that it's bottom doesn't look too big in that swimming costume.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21 All-in-one body suits may never have been so highly starred for swimming like a fish-dart, however, think for a good hour before walking out on the streets wearing one, your fashion credibility may be in danger. The global Sagittarius eyebrow warning is extended through this week and beyond. Destiny has proclaimed that you are going to win the lottery this week especially if your name is Zoe.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19 Slaps on the back, especially of the congratulations variety, should be tempered this week, as you tend to slap congratulations like you would if someone has something stuck in their throat. Games of truth or dare have a 3% higher than usual chance of nakedness after dark.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Officers of the law, judges, parole officers and senior non shelf stacking supermarket employees, are all badly stared especially in any moments of your inadvertent technical breaches of laws or social etiquettes involving small children around Thursday. You are about to come up with one of the most original uses yet for a plastic container milk comes in; Beryl at the patent office is awaiting your call.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 A man who looks uncannily like, but isn't, William Shatner, will be completely imbecilic towards you this week. Your initial reaction will be to offer some sort of deference because he looks so much like one of your childhood heroes. Destiny has just found the cheap sun block it bought last year and is looking for a towel and swimming costume and will meet you on the beach at about 10am.

The Courier Friday TV

August 24

00:20 01:55 02:00 02:30 03:30 04:30 05:15 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 11:58 12:00 12:30 13:13 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:05 16:35 17:00 17:10 17:30 18:00 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 21:30 22:00 22:30 23:00 23:25 23:35

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00:20 00:50 01:50 02:20 02:30 02:45 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00

The Rob Brydon Show Ewan McGregor The Culture Show Newsday Asia Business Report Sport Today BBC World News Asia Business Report Sport Today BBC World News Asia Business Report Sport Today BBC World News

05:20 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie 07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 64 Zoo Lane 07:40 Chuggington 07:50 Rastamouse 08:00 Barney's Latin America 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:40 Frankenstein's Cat 08:50 Arthur 09:15 OOglies 09:30 Nina and the Neurons Go Eco 09:45 Baby Jake 10:00 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:10 Little Charley Bear 10:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:30 Bob the Builder 10:40 The Koala Brothers 10:50 Lunar Jim 11:00 Octonauts: Creature Reports 11:05 Kerwhizz 11:30 Driver Dan's Story Train 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Coast 13:10 Hands on Nature 13:40 Dangerous Moonlight 15:15 Weakest Link 16:00 Real Rescues 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Celebrity MasterChef 20:00 Escape to the Country 21:00 Mastermind 21:30 Gardeners' World 22:00 Parade's End 23:00 The World of Parade's End 23:30 Newsnight

00:45 The Talent Show Story 01:40 Jackpot247 04:00 Tonight 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Don't Blow the Inheritance 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Tonight 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Corrie Goes to Kenya 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 We Own the Night

IDRIS ELBAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S HOW CLUBBING CHANGE THE WORLD The actor and DJ explores the development of dance music culture and charts its journey from underground movement to a multibillion-pound business, revealing how British night-clubbing has transformed the nation and influenced societies worldwide. With personal insights from Nile Rodgers, David Guetta, Armand Van Helden, Goldie, Paul Oakenfold, Pete Tong and Will.i.am among others.

00:10 Peep Show 00:45 Comedy Lab 01:50 Meet Ricky Gervais 02:15 The Jack Dee Show 03:10 Comedy Blaps: Nick Helm Solid Gold Super Hits One 03:15 Comedy Blaps 03:40 Ruby Wax's Mad Confessions 04:35 Dear Mr Brady 05:05 Dispatches 05:35 Apocalypse: The Second World War 06:30 Deal or No Deal 07:25 The Treacle People 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 According to Jim 08:55 Will & Grace 09:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:55 Come Dine with Me 13:30 Channel 4 News 13:35 Three in a Bed 14:35 Channel 4 Presents 14:40 Channel 4 Racing 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Jon Snow's Paralympic Show 21:00 Come Dine with Me 22:00 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 22:00 Countdown 23:00 Idris Elba's How Clubbing Changed the World

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 SuperCasino 04:55 Great Artists 05:20 House Doctor 05:40 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:10 Nick's Quest 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Abby's Flying Fairy School 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Reza, Spice Prince of India 12:40 Andy Bates Street Feasts 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Pawn Stars 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Hard Ground 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Monkey Life 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Cricket on 5 21:00 Ice Road Truckers: Deadliest Roads 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:30 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side

The Courier Saturday TV

August 25

00:05 Come Fly with Me 00:35 The National Lottery Friday Night Draws 00:45 Weatherview 02:40 The Hairy Bikers' Bakeation 03:40 Real Rescues 04:25 Click 04:45 Newswatch 05:00 BBC News 05:30 On the Road With 06:00 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 Lorraine's Fast, Fresh and Easy Food 13:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 13:15 Football Focus 14:00 Jessica Ennis: Golden Girl 14:30 British Olympic Dreams 15:00 Live Challenge Cup Rugby League 18:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 18:20 Total Wipeout 19:20 Pirates of the Caribbean: the Curse of the Black Pearl 21:30 The National Lottery: Secret Fortune 22:20 Casualty 23:10 BBC News; Weather 23:30 National Lottery Update

00:00 00:50 02:25 02:30 03:00 03:30 04:00

The Review Show 2 Days in Paris BBC News Click BBC News The Record Review BBC News

04:30 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie 07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 Dipdap 07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Roar 08:30 Project Parent 08:55 The Scooby-Doo Show 09:20 Dennis and Gnasher 09:30 The Slammer 10:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 10:30 Incredible Edibles 11:00 Cop School 11:30 Diddy Dick & Dom 12:00 Copycats 12:30 OOglies 12:45 MOTD Kickabout 13:00 Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco 14:25 Gymnast 15:55 Tara Road 17:30 Final Score 18:15 Coast 18:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 19:30 Flog It! 20:30 Dad's Army 21:00 BBC Proms 2012 23:30 TOTP2

01:40 ITV News Headlines 03:45 Columbo: Murder by the Book 05:05 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:20 CITV 09:25 Saturday Cookbook 10:25 ITV News 10:30 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 11:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 12:20 The Real Housewives of New York City 13:20 The Real Housewives of New York City 14:20 ITV News and Weather 14:24 Meridian Weather 14:25 The Hit Factory: The Stock Aitken & Waterman Story 15:25 Countrywise 16:00 A View to a Kill 18:30 Meridian News and Weather 18:45 ITV News and Weather 19:00 You've Been Framed! 20:00 Red or Black? 20:45 The X Factor 22:00 Red or Black? 22:45 The Jonathan Ross Show 23:45 ITV News and Weather 23:59 Meridian Weather

C4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GREATEST COMEDY SHOWS A countdown of some of the most memorable British comedy series that have been shown on Channel 4 since the station began broadcasting in 1982, examining how they caught the imagination of viewers and exploring their impact on the country's entertainment industry. The programme features insights into the creation of shows including Father Ted, Spaced, The Inbetweeners, Desmond's, Fonejacker, Peep Show, Green Wing, Phoenix Nights, The Comic Strip Presents, Smack the Pony and Friday Night Live.

01:00 House Party 07:00 The Hoobs 07:25 British Formula Ford Championship 07:55 BG Energy Challenge 08:25 The Grid 08:55 The Morning Line 09:55 V Festival 2012 10:25 iTunes Festival 2012 10:45 New Girl 11:15 Revenge 12:15 Suburgatory 12:50 Summer Daze 13:25 The Big Bang Theory 13:55 The Big Bang Theory 14:20 The Simpsons 14:55 Channel 4 Racing 16:55 The Simpsons 17:25 Come Dine with Me 17:55 Come Dine with Me 18:25 Come Dine with Me 18:55 Come Dine with Me 19:25 Come Dine with Me 19:55 Channel 4 News 20:25 4thought.tv 20:30 Whatever Happened to Harry Hill? 21:30 Harry Hill 22:00 C4's 30 Greatest Comedy Shows

00:15 The Bachelor 01:15 SuperCasino 04:55 Motorsport Mundial 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:10 Nick's Quest 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:15 City of Friends 07:25 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:40 Castle Farm 07:45 Abby's Flying Fairy School 07:55 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:05 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 Play! 08:30 Noddy in Toyland 08:45 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:55 Little Princess 09:10 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:25 Angelina Ballerina 09:40 Rupert Bear 09:55 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:10 The Mr Men Show 10:25 Roary the Racing Car 10:40 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers Samurai 11:35 Batman: The Brave and the Bold 12:10 Looney Tunes 12:15 Looney Tunes 12:25 Celebrity Big Brother 13:55 Monkey Life 14:30 Blue Thunder 16:30 Mary Higgins Clark's We'll Meet Again 18:20 Jesse Stone: No Remorse 20:05 5 News Weekend 20:10 NCIS 21:00 NCIS 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:10 CSI: Miami

The Courier Sunday TV

August 26

01:00 The Football League Show 02:15 Weatherview 02:20 BBC News 02:30 On the Road With 03:00 BBC News 03:30 Dateline London 04:00 BBC News 04:30 Our World 05:00 BBC News 05:30 Click 06:00 BBC News 06:30 HARDtalk 07:00 Breakfast 08:30 Match of the Day 10:00 BBC News 11:00 Sunday Morning Live 12:00 Country Tracks 13:00 BBC News 13:05 Homes Under the Hammer 14:05 Bargain Hunt 15:05 Cash in the Attic 15:45 Escape to the Country 16:45 Ocean Giants 17:45 Songs of Praise 18:20 The Indian Doctor 19:05 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 19:30 Britain's Hidden Heritage 20:30 Countryfile 21:30 Inspector George Gently 23:00 BBC News; Regional News and Weather 23:25 Match of the Day 2

00:30 Before Sunrise

02:10 Once 03:30 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie 07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 Dipdap 07:35 Chuggington 07:45 Rastamouse 08:00 Roar 08:30 Paradise Cafe 08:55 Arthur 09:20 Dennis and Gnasher 09:30 Wingin' It 09:55 Shaun the Sheep 10:00 Who Let the Dogs Out? 10:30 Junior Bake Off 11:00 Saturday Kitchen Best Bites 12:30 The Great British Bake Off 13:30 MotoGP 15:00 Live Athletics 18:00 Oceans 19:00 TOTP2 20:00 Top Gear 21:00 Exploring China: A Culinary Adventure 22:00 Toughest Place to Be 23:00 Murder

00:00 Duplicity 02:15 ITV News Headlines 04:05 In Plain Sight 04:50 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Mini CITV 08:20 CITV 09:25 Dinner Date 10:25 ITV News 10:30 House Gift 11:25 There's No Taste Like Home 12:25 The Hungry Sailors 13:30 ITV News and Weather 13:39 Meridian Weather 13:40 The X Factor 14:55 The Unforgettable 15:25 Columbo: Uneasy Lies the Crown 17:25 Doc Martin 18:25 The Talent Show Story 19:30 Meridian News and Weather 19:45 ITV News and Weather 20:00 The Chase 21:00 Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? 22:00 The Last Weekend 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:14 Meridian Weather 23:15 Tomorrow Never Dies

BAD SUGAR Spoof melodrama, written by Peep Show creators Sam Bain and Jesse Armstrong, following the squabbles and power struggles of the Cauldwells, a dysfunctional British mining dynasty. Starring Sharon Horgan, Olivia Colman and Julia Davis, with David Bradley, Peter Serafinowicz, Kayvan Novak and Reece Shearsmith.

00:05 C4's Greatest Comedy: The Winner Is 02:10 The Comic Strip Presents 02:45 Comedy Lab 03:10 Happy Endings 03:35 Alamar 04:55 St Elsewhere 05:40 Deal or No Deal 06:35 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 Ironman Triathlon 08:00 Channel 4 Presents 08:05 Road to London 2012: Paralympics Extra 08:35 Surfing Special: The Endless Winter 09:00 Will & Grace 09:55 Frasier 10:25 Frasier 11:00 Sunday Brunch 13:25 Jamie Does 14:25 The Big Bang Theory 15:20 The Simpsons 15:50 The Simpsons 16:20 Three in a Bed 17:20 Come Dine with Me 18:25 Deal or No Deal 19:20 Channel 4 News 19:50 4thought.tv 19:55 X-Men Origins: Wolverine 22:00 Peter Kay Live at the Manchester Arena 23:00 Bad Sugar 23:50 Black Books

00:10 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 01:05 SuperCasino 05:00 HouseBusters 05:25 Divine Designs 05:50 Rough Guide to Journeys 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Peppa Pig 07:05 Roary the Racing Car 07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots 07:25 City of Friends 07:40 Harry and His Bucket Full of Dinosaurs 07:50 Castle Farm 07:55 Abby's Flying Fairy School 08:05 Roobarb and Custard Too 08:15 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:25 Play! 08:35 Noddy in Toyland 08:45 Bert and Ernie's Great Adventures 08:55 Milkshake! Monkey 09:00 Little Princess 09:15 The Adventures of Bottle Top Bill and His Best Friend Corky 09:30 Angelina Ballerina 09:45 Rupert Bear 09:55 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:15 The Mr Men Show 10:30 Roary the Racing Car 10:45 Jelly Jamm 11:00 Power Rangers Samurai 11:35 Batman: The Brave and the Bold 12:10 Looney Tunes 12:20 Celebrity Big Brother 13:30 World's 14:20 What about Bob? 16:10 The Kid 18:20 Mutt Ugly: World's Ugliest Dog 19:20 Beauty and the Beast 21:00 Once Upon a Time 21:55 5 News Weekend 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Two Weeks Notice

The Courier Monday TV

August 27

00:25 In with the Flynns 00:55 Flashbacks of a Fool 02:40 Weatherview 02:45 The Dark: Nature's Nighttime World 03:45 Holby City 04:45 Amish: A Secret Life 05:45 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:00 Heir Hunters 10:45 Homes Under the Hammer 11:45 Saints and Scroungers 12:15 Animal 24:7 13:00 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News at One 14:15 Regional News and Weather 14:20 Paulie 15:45 BBC Proms 2012 16:30 Wallace & Gromit in The Curse of the Were-Rabbit 17:45 Pointless 18:30 BBC News 18:50 Weather 19:00 Countryfile 20:00 The Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo 2012 21:00 EastEnders 21:30 The One Show 22:00 New Tricks 23:00 BBC News 23:10 Regional News and Weather 23:20 Citizen Khan 23:50 Gavin & Stacey

00:00 Saints 01:35 03:00 03:30 03:45 04:00 04:30 04:45 05:00 05:25 07:00 07:10 07:20 07:30

A Guide to Recognizing Your Adam & Paul BBC World News Asia Business Report Sport Today BBC World News Asia Business Report Sport Today BBC World News Close Guess with Jess Louie Wibbly Pig 64 Zoo Lane

07:40 Timmy Time 08:00 Barney's Latin America 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:40 Frankenstein's Cat 08:50 Arthur 09:15 OOglies 09:30 Nina and the Neurons 09:45 Baby Jake 10:00 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:10 Little Charley Bear 10:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:30 Bob the Builder 10:40 The Koala Brothers 10:50 Lunar Jim 11:00 Octonauts: Creature Reports 11:05 Kerwhizz 11:30 Driver Dan's Story Train 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Coast 13:10 To Buy or Not to Buy 13:40 Build My Gallows High 15:15 Weakest Link 16:00 Real Rescues 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Celebrity MasterChef 20:00 Dig WW2 with Dan Snow 21:00 University Challenge 21:30 Lorraine's Fast, Fresh and Easy Food 22:00 Horizon 23:00 James May's Things You Need to Know 23:30 Precious

01:25 ITV News Headlines 03:30 Golden Balls 04:20 Motorsport UK 05:10 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 The Jeremy Kyle Show USA 12:25 Dickinson's Real Deal 13:25 60 Minute Makeover 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:40 Meridian News and Weather 14:45 Countrywise 15:05 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 Secret Dealers 17:00 An Audience with Barry Manilow 18:00 Don't Blow the Inheritance 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:15 ITV News and Weather 19:30 You've Been Framed! 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Coronation Street 21:00 Countrywise 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Harry's Mountain Heroes 23:30 ITV News and Weather 23:40 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:45 Serenity

HARRYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MOUNTAIN HEROES

Documentary following five soldiers wounded in Iraq and Afghanistan as they take on one of the world's toughest challenges - a climb to the summit of Mount Everest - with the support of expedition patron and friend Prince Harry. The participants - captains Martin Hewitt and David Wiseman, privates Jaco van Gass and Karl Hinett, and doctor Francis Atkinson - undergo training in the UK before embarking on a journey that sees them struggle with altitude, night climbs in plummeting temperatures, avalanches and terrifying ladder crossings over crevasses.

00:20 Dylan Moran Live: Yeah, Yeah 01:25 Comedy Lab 01:55 Da Ali G Show 02:30 Comedy Lab 02:55 The Mark Thomas Comedy Product 03:25 Happy Endings 03:50 Hollyoaks 05:50 Deal or No Deal 06:45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:10 Sali Mali 07:15 The Hoobs 08:05 Freshly Squeezed 08:35 According to Jim 09:00 Will & Grace 09:30 Everybody Loves Raymond 10:35 Frasier 11:05 Frasier 11:35 Come Dine with Me 14:20 Sense and Sensibility 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 Channel 4 Presents 20:30 Jon Snow's Paralympic Show 21:00 The Restoration Man 22:00 Alan Carr Live: Spexy Beast 23:00 The Boyle Variety Performance

00:55 Frontline Police 01:55 SuperCasino 05:00 Sons of Anarchy 05:50 Rough Guide to Bang for Your Buck 06:00 Hana's Helpline 06:10 The Milkshake! Show 06:35 Thomas & Friends 06:45 Roary the Racing Car 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Castle Farm 10:00 Abby's Flying Fairy School 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Pawn Stars 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 Monkey Life 15:45 Looney Tunes 15:55 The Wizard of Oz 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Andy Bates Street Feasts 19:30 Looney Tunes 19:35 Alone Among Grizzlies 21:00 Frontline Police 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 Celebrity Wedding Planner

The Courier Tuesday TV

August 28

00:20 02:10 02:15 03:15 04:15 04:45 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 11:58 12:00 12:30 13:13 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:05 16:35 17:00 17:10 17:30 18:00 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

Eagle Eye Weatherview Engineering Giants Babies in the Office Doorstep Crime 999 Real Rescues HARDtalk BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Heir Hunters Homes Under the Hammer BBC News; Weather Saints and Scroungers Animal 24:7 BBC News; Weather Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Escape to the Country BBC News; Weather I Want My Own Room Splatalot Shaun the Sheep Wingin' It Trade Your Way to the USA Newsround Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show BBC News; Regional News Holby City Accused BBC News Regional News and Weather The Lock Up

07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 64 Zoo Lane 07:40 Chuggington 07:50 Rastamouse 08:00 Barney's Latin America 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:40 Frankenstein's Cat 08:50 Arthur 09:15 OOglies 09:30 Nina and the Neurons: In the Lab 09:45 Baby Jake 10:00 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:10 Little Charley Bear 10:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:30 Bob the Builder: Project Build It 10:40 The Koala Brothers 10:50 Lunar Jim 11:00 Octonauts: Creature Reports 11:05 Kerwhizz 11:30 Driver Dan's Story Train 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Coast 13:05 To Buy or Not to Buy 13:50 Days of Glory 15:15 Weakest Link 16:00 Real Rescues 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Celebrity MasterChef 20:00 Dig WW2 with Dan Snow 21:00 The Great British Bake Off 22:00 The Midwives 23:00 The Rob Brydon Show 23:30 Newsnight

01:50 ITV News Headlines 04:00 Champions League Weekly 04:25 ITV Nightscreen 05:35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Don't Blow the Inheritance 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Live UEFA Champions League 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 Corrie Goes to Kenya

THE LOCK UP 01:15 Toughest Place to Be 02:15 Newsday 02:30 ABC World News with Diane Sawyer 03:00 BBC World News 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 BBC World News 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 BBC World News 05:15 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie

New series. Documentary following officers in the custody suite of a police station in Hull. Sergeant Stuart Constable has to move a regular offender who claims there is an infestation of ants in his cell, while a wheelchair user arrested numerous times for breaching an Asbo creates just as much trouble behind bars. Narrated by John Thomson.

00:10 The Inbetweeners 00:40 Harry Enfield Presents 00:45 Norbert Smith: A Life 01:45 Star Stories 02:15 Smack the Pony 02:40 Bill Hicks Live: Revelations 03:40 Shortscreen 03:45 Elizabethtown 05:45 A Guide to Taking a Photo 05:50 Deal or No Deal 06:45 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 07:10 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 According to Jim 08:55 Will & Grace 09:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:55 Come Dine with Me 13:30 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:35 Channel 4 Presents 13:40 A Place in the Sun 14:40 River Cottage 14:50 Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:25 Channel 4 Presents 20:30 Jon Snow's Paralympic Show 21:00 SuperScrimpers 22:00 Islam: The Untold Story 23:35 Obsessive Compulsive Hoarder: The Big Clear Out

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 The Hotel Inspector 02:00 SuperCasino 04:50 Great Artists 05:15 House Doctor 05:40 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:10 Nick's Quest 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Castle Farm 10:00 Abby's Flying Fairy School 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Pawn Stars 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 NCIS 16:15 Incident in a Small Town 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Andy Bates Street Feasts 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Ice Road Truckers: Deadliest Roads 21:00 Born to Kill 22:00 Person of Interest 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

The Courier Wednesday TV

August 29

00:15 Citizen Khan 00:45 Greenfingers 02:15 Weatherview 02:20 7/7: One Day in London 03:50 Babies in the Office 04:50 Real Rescues 05:35 HARDtalk 06:00 BBC News 06:30 World Business Report 06:45 BBC News 07:00 Breakfast 10:15 Heir Hunters 11:00 Homes Under the Hammer 11:58 BBC News; Weather 12:00 Saints and Scroungers 12:30 Animal 24:7 13:13 BBC News; Weather 13:15 Bargain Hunt 14:00 BBC News; Weather 14:30 Regional News and Weather 14:45 Doctors 15:15 Escape to the Country 16:00 BBC News; Weather 16:05 I Want My Own Room 16:35 Splatalot 17:00 Shaun the Sheep 17:10 Wingin' It 17:30 Jedward's Big Adventure 18:00 Newsround 18:15 Pointless 19:00 BBC News 19:30 Weather 19:30 Regional News Programmes 20:00 The One Show 21:00 The Flowerpot Gang 22:00 Who Do You Think You Are? 23:00 BBC News 23:25 Regional News and Weather 23:35 The National Lottery Wednesday Night Draws 23:45 Have I Got Old News for You

00:20 James May's Things You Need to Know 00:50 The World of Parade's End 01:20 BBC News 01:30 HARDtalk 02:00 Newsday 02:30 Asia Business Report 02:45 Sport Today 03:00 BBC World News 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 BBC World News 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today

05:00 BBC World News 05:20 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie 07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 64 Zoo Lane 07:40 Chuggington 07:50 Rastamouse 08:00 Barney's Latin America 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:40 Frankenstein's Cat 08:50 Arthur 09:15 OOglies 09:30 Nina and the Neurons 09:45 Baby Jake 10:00 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:10 Little Charley Bear 10:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:30 Bob the Builder 10:40 The Koala Brothers 10:50 Lunar Jim 11:00 Octonauts: Creature Reports 11:05 Kerwhizz 11:30 Driver Dan's Story Train 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Coast 13:20 Gunga Din 15:15 Weakest Link 16:00 Real Rescues 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Celebrity MasterChef 20:00 Dig WW2 with Dan Snow 21:00 Restoration Home 22:00 Vexed 23:00 The Culture Show 23:30 Newsnight

00:35 UEFA Champions League: Extra Time 01:30 ITV News Headlines 04:00 Golden Balls 04:45 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Don't Blow the Inheritance 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 The Corrie Years 21:00 Super Tiny Animals 22:00 Britain Then and Now 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 The Jacket

PARALYMPIC OPENING CEREMONY Jon Snow and Krishnan Guru-Murthy present coverage from the Olympic Stadium in Stratford, east London, as the 14th edition of the Paralympic Games is declared open. The ceremony, entitled Enlightenment, has been designed to challenge perceptions of human possibility and showcase the achievements of British disabled artists and performers, including members of the charity Aerobility, who have overcome barriers to fly aircraft, and a group of people who acquired circus skills on a training course.

Join The TKO Roadshow on Sunday 2nd September from 12pm for Party On The Park at Pablo’s International Bar, Parque del Deuge, Playa Flamenca. Come alone and help raise money for Help For Heroes Charity. TKO’s very own Davy Jones will be entertaining the crowds along with a host of other performers and acts with bingo, raffles, BBQ & Grill all throughout the day.

1. Elton found freedom in this American city. 2. Terence Nelhams was better known by his stage name. 3. Feargal Sharkey was the lead singer with this group. 4. He had the Whole World In His Hands in 1957. 5. In 1982 Ghosts was their biggest hit. 6. Yardbirds 1966 hit was all over the place. 7. Birthplace of the Grand Old Opry. 8. Jamesetta Hawkins is the real name of this R & B legend. 9. Home town for Procul Harum. All you have to do is take the first letter from each answer to find the name of a band or artist & Listen to Chris Ashley Saturdays 9am - 12pm

00:40 24 Hours in A&E 01:40 Surfing Special: The Endless Winter 02:05 KOTV Boxing Weekly 02:30 Sailing 02:55 International Volleyball 03:50 The Grid 04:15 British Formula Ford Championship 04:45 FIM World Superbikes 05:10 BG Energy Challenge 05:40 Brief Encounters of the Sporting Mind 05:45 FIA GT1 World Championship 06:40 Ironman Triathlon 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 The Hoobs 08:00 Freshly Squeezed 08:30 According to Jim 08:55 Will & Grace 09:25 Everybody Loves Raymond 09:55 Frasier 10:25 Come Dine with Me 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 The Odyssey 13:40 A Place in the Sun 14:45 Channel 4 Presents 14:50 Sabrina 17:00 Deal or No Deal 18:00 Come Dine with Me 19:00 The Simpsons 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 21:00 London 2012 Paralympic Games Opening Ceremony

00:00 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:00 Cricket on 5 01:55 SuperCasino 04:55 Great Artists 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:10 Nick's Quest 06:35 Wildlife SOS 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 09:55 Castle Farm 10:00 Abby's Flying Fairy School 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Pawn Stars 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 Thicker than Water 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Andy Bates Street Feasts 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 The Hotel Inspector 21:00 Secret Interview 22:00 Celebrity Big Brother 23:00 John Barrowman's Dallas 23:40 John Barrowman's Dallas

The Courier Thursday TV

August 30

00:15 01:15 03:10 03:15 04:15 04:45 05:30 06:00 06:30 06:45 07:00 10:15 11:00 11:58 12:00 12:30 13:13 13:15 14:00 14:30 14:45 15:15 16:00 16:05 16:35 17:00 17:10 17:30 18:00 18:15 19:00 19:30 20:00 20:30 21:00 22:00 23:00 23:25 23:35

National Lottery Update Color of Night Weatherview The Tube Doorstep Crime 999 Real Rescues Panorama BBC News World Business Report BBC News Breakfast Heir Hunters Homes Under the Hammer BBC News; Weather Saints and Scroungers Animal 24:7 BBC News; Weather Bargain Hunt BBC News; Weather Regional News and Weather Doctors Escape to the Country BBC News; Weather I Want My Own Room Splatalot Shaun the Sheep Wingin' It Roy Newsround Pointless BBC News Weather The One Show BBC News; Regional News Waterloo Road Good Cop BBC News Regional News and Weather Neighbourhood Watched

05:35 Close 07:00 Guess with Jess 07:10 Louie 07:20 Wibbly Pig 07:30 64 Zoo Lane 07:40 Chuggington 07:50 Rastamouse 08:00 Barney's Latin America 08:30 League of Super Evil 08:40 Frankenstein's Cat 08:50 Arthur 09:15 OOglies 09:30 Nina and the Neurons 09:45 Baby Jake 10:00 Tinga Tinga Tales 10:10 Little Charley Bear 10:20 Raa Raa the Noisy Lion 10:30 Bob the Builder 10:40 The Koala Brothers 10:50 Lunar Jim 11:00 Octonauts: Creature Reports 11:05 Kerwhizz 11:30 Driver Dan's Story Train 11:40 Waybuloo 12:00 In the Night Garden 12:30 BBC World News 13:00 Coast 13:20 To Buy or Not to Buy 13:50 Hotel Reserve 15:15 Weakest Link 16:00 Real Rescues 16:45 The Hairy Bikers' Food Tour of Britain 17:30 Flog It! 18:15 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is 19:00 Eggheads 19:30 Celebrity MasterChef 20:00 Live Athletics 22:00 Volcano Live 23:00 The Boss Is Back 23:30 Newsnight

01:25 ITV News Headlines 03:30 British Touring Car Championship Highlights 04:40 ITV Nightscreen 06:30 ITV Morning News 07:00 Daybreak 09:30 Lorraine 10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show 11:30 This Morning 13:30 Let's Do Lunch with Gino & Mel 14:30 ITV News and Weather 14:55 Meridian News and Weather 15:00 Murder, She Wrote 16:00 Secret Dealers 16:59 Meridian Weather 17:00 Midsomer Murders 18:00 Don't Blow the Inheritance 19:00 Meridian Tonight 19:30 ITV News and Weather 20:00 Emmerdale 20:30 Tonight 21:00 Emmerdale 21:30 Coronation Street 22:00 Britain by Night 23:00 ITV News at Ten and Weather 23:30 Meridian Tonight and Weather 23:35 The Jonathan Ross Show

GOOD COP 00:20 The Midwives 01:20 BBC News 01:30 HARDtalk 02:00 BBC News 02:30 ABC World News with Diane Sawyer 03:00 BBC World News 03:30 Asia Business Report 03:45 Sport Today 04:00 BBC World News 04:30 Asia Business Report 04:45 Sport Today 05:00 BBC World News 05:30 Panorama

New series. Liverpool policeman John Paul Rocksavage, known as Sav, and his colleague Andy Stockwell intervene when a gang of men mistreats a waitress at a diner. In an act of retribution, its leader Noel Finch sets up a false call-out and an unsuspecting Stockwell suffers a brutal assault at the hands of the thugs, resulting in his death. Returning to the scene of the crime, a distraught Sav finds a loaded gun concealed under a loose floorboard and when Finch appears he makes a fateful decision.

00:20 8 Out of 10 Cats Does Countdown 01:25 Jimmy Carr: Making People Laugh 02:20 Summer Daze 02:50 Mercury Prize Sessions 03:00 iTunes Festival 2012: Preview 03:15 Spotlight 03:30 Coming Up 03:55 Mesh 04:00 Happy Endings 04:25 St Elsewhere 05:10 Deal or No Deal 06:05 Make Do & Mend 06:30 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard 06:55 Sali Mali 07:00 The Treacle People 07:10 The Hoobs 07:35 Freshly Squeezed 08:00 Paralympic Games Breakfast Show 10:15 Paralympic Games 2012 13:00 Channel 4 News Midday Summary 13:05 Paralympic Games 2012 14:00 Paralympic Games 2012 16:25 Deal or No Deal 17:25 Come Dine with Me 17:55 The Simpsons 18:25 Paralympic Games 2012 19:30 Hollyoaks 20:00 Channel 4 News 20:30 Paralympic Games 2012 Tonight 23:30 The Last Leg with Adam Hills

00:10 Celebrity Big Brother 00:35 Celebrity Big Brother's Bit on the Side 01:35 Comedy Kings: Best of Just for Laughs 02:00 SuperCasino 04:55 HouseBusters 05:20 House Doctor 05:45 Michaela's Wild Challenge 06:10 Wildlife SOS 06:35 Nick's Quest 07:00 Thomas & Friends 07:10 The WotWots 07:20 City of Friends 07:30 Jelly Jamm 07:45 Peppa Pig 07:50 Big School 08:00 Little Princess 08:10 Ben and Holly's Little Kingdom 08:20 The Mr Men Show 08:35 Thomas & Friends 08:45 Make Way for Noddy 09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots 09:15 Peppa Pig 09:25 Peppa Pig 09:30 Roary the Racing Car 09:45 Bananas in Pyjamas 10:00 Abby's Flying Fairy School 10:15 The Wright Stuff 12:10 Ultimate Police Interceptors 13:10 5 News Lunchtime 13:15 Celebrity Big Brother 14:15 Pawn Stars 14:45 Neighbours 15:15 CSI: Crime Scene Investigation 16:15 McBride: It's Murder, Madam 18:00 5 News at 5 18:30 Neighbours 19:00 Andy Bates Street Feasts 19:30 5 News at 6.30 20:00 Stansted: The Inside Story 21:00 Revealed 22:00 The Hotel Inspector 23:00 Celebrity Big Brother

Friday, August 24, 2012

CHURCH SERVICES

CARS FOR SALE

ADT Authorised Distributor Fully fitted Alarm systems Approved by the Guardia Civil. Masterboard key pad with remote control. A wireless or fixed control handset. Two image movement detectors with microphones. Movement detector. Wall alarm with the ADT logo.GPRS / GSM Transmitter sim card for transmitting video and alarm signals. Sent to your mobile phone. All this for 149 € + iva. Installed. Then 29€ a Month. For professional advice and quotation Call 966 923 963 (76)

International Christian Assembly, Calle Pilar de Horadada 5, Torrevieja. Evangelical non-denominational church. Sunday services 11am. Children's church 11am. House groups in Torrevieja, Los Balcones, San Javier. Ladies meeting Thursdays 11am. Craft club, Tuesdays, 2pm. Pastor, Rafael Restrepo. All nationalities welcome. Call 966 799 273 or 660 127 276. Pilar Christian Community Church Calle Canalejas 3. Pilar de la Horadada. Sunday Service at 11am, and Thursday at 5pm for Bible study and Prayer. Home groups meet during the week. All welcome from any church background or none. For further information contact Pilar ChristianCommunity Church@gmail.com or contact Reverend Eddie on 966 7693 00 or 650 509 606. Reg No:2009-SG/A

ANN SUMMERS

BOUTIQUE

Try Professional Business Support for your quick quote for car insurance. Excellent prices for expats, all policies available in English or German. We will call you back with a price. 966 923 963 Renault Megan Gran Scenic 7 seater, June 2011 latest model, 1.6 dci 6 spd, dynamque, 1 owner, 21,000 kms, fully serviced, cruise control, front fogs, cd, rear picnic table, rear light sensors, ISOFIX stunning condition, pearlescent white with half leather, Cost 25,000 euros new - 18,750 euros with manufacturers warranty 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Looking for a car? We have a good selection of LHD & RHD vehicles for sale or exchange Tel 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Mini one 1.6 90 bhp 2005, 2 owners 55,000 kms FSH, chilli pack, 17" full sport alloys, finished in met blue/black, front fogs, CD, RHD, Spanish registered 5950 euros Also available LHD AUTO MODEL 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Festa 1.4 steel 5 dr, 2 owners, 61,000 kms, FSH, Air con, CD, electric windows, front fogs, multi air bag, rear head restraints, rear luggage cover, met sil-

ACCOUNTANTS Are you running a business? Let us simplify things for you – accountancy, taxes, payroll services and more. We cater for companies and individuals. Established in 1984 on the Costa Blanca. Call us on 966 923 963 for your first consultation free of charge.

ALARMS

AUCTIONS

ALTERATIONS

ver, beautiful condition, 4950 euros 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com Ford Focus 1.6 Trend AUTO Tiptronic 5 dr, 2 owners 63,000 kms, fully serviced, CD, Front Fogs, Rear Head Restraints, remote central locking, electric windows, electric mirrors, rear luggage cover, metallic grey 7450 euros 600 726 221 / 965 687 976 www.fwreurocars.com

INSURANCE For all your insurance needs, ie.home, car, health, funeral, travel, etc Excellent cover from Spain´s 5th biggest insurance company, “CASER”. Policies available in English and German. Call Professional Business Support on 966 923 963 for a quick quote from a real person/our friendly staff.

MEDICAL Make the most of private health care and private hospitals, we have great cover and a two tier pricing system to suit your age and pocket. All policies in English, many English speaking doctors or free translators at your service. Call us now on 966 923 963, and we will call you back with your quote. Caser Health Care .

PROPERTY FOR RENT Viva Villa and Vacation Services, For Short or Long

Term Rentals visit: www.villaandvacation.com or Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 PROPERTY FOR RENT Large 2 Bed Apartment in Torrevieja Centre furnished with aircon. Holiday lets from mid August at 350€ a week or Long lets from 380€ a Month plus Utilities. Call 618 715 998 (79) Long Let Torrevieja. 2 bedroom park home, washing machine, aircon, TV, DVD,communal bar and pool 275 euros per month plus bills. Tel 617599470 (79) Ref: 49, 2nd floor one bedroom apartment situated conveniently located in the town centre of Torrevieja, with a small sun balcony overlooking the lovely communal pool. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 33, Ground floor spacious 2 bedroom apartment, located in Torre la Mata. Close to all amenities and beach. 3 month rental €300pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref 25 3 bedrooms 2 bathrooms fully furnished villa to let on a small urb €500 per month plus bills. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 112, Spacious 3 bedroom detached villa with its private pool is located on the El Raso urbanisation near Guardamar. Convenient for all amenities, shops, supermarket, restaurants and

bars. Short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 63, Two bedroom 1st floor apartment situated in Monino Blanco. The property overlooks a superb communal pool area, in within walking distance of bars, restaurants and shops. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 155, Luxurious Three Bedroom Villa With Private Pool, in Quesada Close to shops and restaurants within a five minute drive, and Guadamar Beach is within a ten minute drive. Short term rental €800PCM. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

CAR HIRE

BARBER

AIRPORT COLLECTION

AIR CONDITIONING

AUTO ELECTRICIAN

COMPUTERS ALARMS

BOARDING KENNELS

CLEANERS

Friday, August 24, 2012 Ref 702: Beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, located near los Locos beach, beautifully furnished. Short term rentals from 175€ per week. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 El Chaparel/La Siesta Two bedroom apartment in a quiet gated urbanisation for rent €350 per month plus bills. Reference No 17 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 104, 2 Bedroom apartment in Torrevieja, (near gypsy lane), small balcony, near all amenities and Friday market. €350pcm Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 117, A Lovely 3

Bedroomed 1st floor apartment on the outskirts of Torrevieja (Mar Azul). The Apartment is in walking distance of the excellent beaches and a good selection of restaurants, shops and bars. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 61, A lovely two bedroomed ground floor apartment, located in the centre of the small Spanish town of Los Montesinos, With a pleasant communal swimming pool adjacent & all amenities in walking distance. Long and short term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

PROPERTY FOR SALE Excellent cover for your house and home, includes travel assistance for when you go away. Interesting prices for expats; policies

DRAINAGE

available in English or German. Call 966 923 963 for a quote Lovely Corner property in Novamar V, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms Being sold fully furnished including appliances, Has secure underground parking and faces large oasis communal pool. Walking distance to beach. 139.000 Euros, Call 627 711 155 and quote Ref No. K10 Ground floor duplex, with splendid views. Quiet location in Gran Alacant. Immaculate condition. Price has just been reduced to 105.000 and includes everything. For viewing call 627 711 155 Ref. No K27 Rare opportunity to purchase on Mediterrania III, Gran Alacant. 2 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, Private Parking, F/Furnished, Large communal pools & Tennis courts S/W facing, Dramatically reduced for quick sale to 126.000 euros. Ref No. K58 Call 627 711 155 for immediate viewing Don Pueblo, Gran Alacant. 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Large Kitchen with Galleria, Secure underground parking, Gas Central Heating, Glazed in Porch, Solarium with stunning views. Viewings absolutely essential. Very large property at reduced price of 190.000 euros. Ref No. K38 Call 627 711 155 Opportunity to purchase at the off plan price of 195.000 euros. Large 4 Bed, 3 Bath Brand new property. Secure underground parking for 2 cars and communal pool. Situated opposite Gran Alacant and over looks projected golf course. Ref No. K52. 627 711 155 2 Bed, 1 Bath Ground floor duplex. Central heating,

ENERGY SAVER

ELECTRICAL REPAIRS

DAMP PROOFING

ELECTRICIAN

Grills, Fully furnished, Glazed in Galleria, 2 communal pools, private parking and walking distance to the Gran Alacant commercial centre. Situated in the popular urbanisation of Puerto Marino. Now only 96,500 euros for quick sale Ref No. K46. 627 711 155 Immaculate ground floor Duplex, 2 beds, 2 bath, Private Parking, Situated in Novamar, Gran Alacant. Price includes very tasteful furniture and white goods. Walking distance to all local amenities and beach. Now only 129,750 euros. Ref No K24. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant Detached villa, located in a very sought after location.Situated on a 560m2 S/W facing plot and constructed in 2005. Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms (2 full baths), Lounge-Diner, fully equipped Kitchen, Porch and Solarium with Alicante & Sea Views. ref.L81. €258,000 neg. Tel. 680333242 Ref 533: Lovely 2 bedroom Townhouse located in the popular area of Punta Prima, the property has a large lounge and fully equipped kitchen, 2 double bedrooms, one with balcony, bathroom with double shower. €126,000 Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant Opportunity to purchase a beautiful 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed,large kitchen, detached property with roof- top solarium. Well established gardens and drive way for 2 cars, whilst also overlooking the projected 18 hole golf course. Comprising of fitted wardrobes, utility room, air con H/C, alarm system, electric wall heaters, intercom system, fireplace, ceilings fans, 8x7 gazebo, use of 2 large communal pools, immaculate condition with many extras. ref K12. €180,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant bargain, detached villa with pool on 400m2 plot. Briefly comprising of 3 bedrooms, 3 bath-

ELECTRICIAN

FISHING

rooms, Lounge Diner, independent kitchen, solarium with views, well maintained gardens. Quiet location yet within walking distance of all amenities. Top quality furniture and appliances included in the price. Extras include, mosquito nets, grills, toldos blinds, built in wardrobes, gas fire, electric heating, ceiling fans, English & Spanish TV, tastefully tiled & graveled garden with irrigation system. ref K43. €229,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant South facing attractive corner house Situated in the sought after urbanization of Monte Faro, this secure gated urbanization offers a stunning oasis pool, with mountain views, tennis courts and football courts. Consisting of 3 double beds with balconies, 2 bathrooms, kitchen leading onto court yard which can easily be converted into an extra room, lounge diner with working fireplace, front garden with private parking for 2 cars. Being sold fully furnishes with white goods, built in 2006 so immaculate condition hardly lived in. Ref K48 €168,000 priced for quick sale Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Large detached villa with beautiful gardens set on 550m2 plot, built in BBQ area and large 10x6 pool.Comprising of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, Lounge Diner with fire place, Independent Kitchen, air con H/C, Solarium, front porch, converted under build with 3 extra rooms, private covered parking, irrigated gardens, close distance to beach and amenities. Ref. K18 €250,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Gem! Fabulous detached Villa,

FITNESS

with Alicante sea views to the front and wood land views to the rear, means this immaculate villa is very private and un-overlooked. Comprising of 2 large bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 2 bath, large fully equipped kitchen,glazed porch sitting area, solarium, Attractive Pool with cover, well maintained Gardens. Central Heating, Air Con, Ceiling fans, Private Parking, Alarm system, Decorative working Fire Place complete with electric Fire. Outdoor workshop/storage area, Quality Pergola & BBQ. Constructed in 2006, on plot size of 380m2 and being sold fully furnished including white goods. ref L80. €234,995 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant immaculate villa, 3 bedroomed, 3 bathroomed property maintained to a very high standard inside and out and the interior furnishings are top quality, offering a feeling of luxury and good taste. The plot size is 400m2 and has been beautifully tiles, and graveled and has established palms and plants. Oil fired central heating throughout, log effect fire place, ceiling fans in all rooms, towel heater rails, glazed in shower units, instant hot water, water purifier, free English TV, phone & internet lines, fitted double hanging wardrobes, safe, glazed in front porch, vanity units and much more. The pool is an 8 X 4 m2 salt water pool, meaning maintenance is much easier plus outside toilet and shower. Sea views to front with Greenland views to the rear. ref K51. €245,000 Tel 680333242

JEWELLERY REPAIR

FAST BROADBAND

Friday, August 24, 2012

Viva Villa and Vacation Services are pleased to offer property sales for the Torrevieja and Oriheula areas of the Costa Blanca, Spain. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 or Visit : www.villaandvacation.com Balsares is opposite Gran Alacant where the proposed golf course is now being started so this property will virtually be on the golf course, it is an investment not to be missed. The property is on a small gated urbanisation of 18 houses with private underground parking for 2 cars and direct access to the house, communal pool and

LOCKSMITH

toilets/changing rooms etc. The house is brand new and consists of 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, lounge with working fire place, large kitchen 12 m2, large galleria/ utility room, bedroom balcony and front tiled terrace. This property also has a converted under build for an extra lounge or bedroom. ref K52 €198,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 521, €105,000. This comfortable bungalow is located in San Luis with a new roof and solarium tiles. It is close to supermarkets, bars, restaurants and is on the local bus route. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 516, €39,999. Studio apartment in San Luis, close to amenities. Open plan fully equipped kitchen. Good sized lounge, bedroom and out onto balcony which has been glazed to create another room. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 510, €70,000. Bungalow located in San Luis. It is close to the supermarkets, bars and restau-

rants and is on the local bus route. An Opel Corsa car is included in this sale. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: KP3100, €183,000. Three bedroom, two bathroom detached villa, located in San Luis, on a 450sqm plot, with communal pool. Garage to side of house. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 78, €120,000. Three bedroom Quad in Jardin Del Mar VII. There is off-road parking and small storage shed in the enclosed garden area, communal pool nearby. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Ref: 709, €60,000 A lovely 1 bedroom apartment in Aguas Nuevas, within a 5 minute walk of the beach. There is a terrace outside with views to the sea. Short or long term rental available. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Gran Alacant, Situated in the "Alto" part of Gran Alacant, this 3 bedroomed, 4th floor apartment, offers luxury accommodation, with absolutely stunning sea views, as well as views of Alicante bay and the famous Santa Barbara Castle.The apartment is 89 square meters with open plan kitchen / living room and includes all electrical appliances & furniture also there is a utility room, open terrace, and private parking. The urbanisation also offers many communal pools, tennis courts, restaurants and bars. Ref. K20 €109,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant large detached villa with 3 double bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge-diner, fully equipped

MOSQIUITO SCREENS KENNELS

PETS

MASSAGE

kitchen, large porch, roof top solarium, 400 m2 Plot, with established low maintenance very private gardens with irrigation system, electronic gates, private parking, outside wc, sink & shower, terraces, air con ( h & c ), mosquito nets, grills, alarmed, large spa pool with separate Jacuzzi section. Within easy walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and close to local bus and tram route. Ref K33. €260,000 neg Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant limited edition villa, not very often available on the market. Only a few of this type were ever constructed- Very large 5 bedrooms, 4 bathroom(2 ensuit) property, situated on a large corner plot with a 10 x 5 private pool and private parking. Lounge-diner with working fireplace, fully equipped kitchen with utility room. Large landing area, leading onto solarium, with extra storage external room. Front porch area leading into large well established gardens with irrigation system and fruit trees. Being sold fully furnished. Within walking distance to Gran Alacant commercial centre and 5 minute drive to Carabassi beaches. ref. K11. €270,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant Limited edition bungalow. Only six of this type available in Gran Alacant. Constructed in 2003 and immaculately maintained on a large plot size of 500m2 with a 10 x 5 pool.Comprising of 3 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms, lounge-diner leading out onto front porch, independent kitchen including white goods, outside galleria, court yard, large garage with electric door, roof top solarium and private parking. Also built in wardrobes, Toldos blinds, air con H/C, security grills, alarm, security doors, bathrooms heaters, outside toilet, outdoor lighting, irrigation system, attractive and well kept gardens, beautifully tiled inside and out, fire place, English TV, phone line. Being sold with top

quality furniture. ref L95. €275,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated in the central area of Gran Alacant and within walking distance to all local amenities such as a selection of different cuisine restaurants, bars, pharmacies, banks, popular GA market and Carabassi Beach. Comprises of 4 bedrooms, 2 bathrooms with a private garage and roof-top solarium. This property is part of a small urbanization which has the use of a large decorative communal pool. Ref. K36 €149,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, corner property in Don Pueblo with no expense spared, comprising of 3 double bedrooms with fitted wardrobes, 2 decoratively tiled bathrooms, very large independent kitchen with galleria. Included in the price are all kitchen appliances such as large fridge freezer, washing machine, dishwasher, microwave to name just a few. There is a huge lounge complete with chimney, plus large fully transformed under build,and small workshop. Front and rear private garden area, secure underground garage, tennis courts, football pitch and communal pools. Ref. K14 €209,00 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Ground floor south west facing apartment

in Puerto Marino close to G.A commercial centre, comprising of 2 Bedrooms, 1 Bathroom, Lounge-Diner, Independent Kitchen with Galleria, Porch area and large tiled front garden, The property is being sold fully furnished and includes all kitchen appliances, H & C Air con is fitted as well as sky TV. The apartment enjoys the use of 2 large communal pools and has private parking in an enclosed electronically gated car park. Competitively priced for a quick sale. Ref. K40 €91,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, Situated on the very first urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant, this 2nd floor duplex offers taste and quality. Comprising of 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, lounge-diner, independent kitchen, full roof-top solarium with superb views and recently glazed in porch offering extra living area as well as extra privacy as the glass is mirrored. Ref.K44 €108,000 Tel 680333242 Ref: 520, €85,000. Two bedroom apartment in Dream Hills, with a fully equipped kitchen, large lounge, glazed-in terrace and a large solarium. This property comes with a large communal swimming pool. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397

TATTOOS

TELEVISION

POOLS

PERSONAL

PLUMBERS

MOBILE CAR REPAIRS

POOL TABLES

PLASTERER

Friday, August 24, 2012 Ref: 513, €115,000. Two bedroom ground floor apartment, in Aguas Nuevas, close to all amenities including the beach. It has a good size lounge, kitchen and has off road parking facilities. Call: 965 707 188 or 626 397 397 Top floor Duplex. Very good price of 108.000 euros for a quick sale. Furnished to a very high standard, 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, Lounge Diner, Glazed in Porch, Large Roof Top Solarium. Choice of Communal Pools, Private Parking. Walking distance to all amenities and on the First urbanisation as you enter Gran Alacant. Viewing essential. Ref No. K44. Tel. 627 711 155 Gran Alacant beautiful detached villa with very large pool and within walking distance to the Gran Alacant Commercial Centre. This villa comprised of 3 Bedrooms, 3 Bathrooms, lounge-diner, Independent kitchen, roof top storage, solarium, porch & terrace. Large private pool, BBQ area, established gardens and private terraces, Private

Parking, Solarium with Views to Alicante. 450m2 plot, fully furnished including white goods. Located in very quiet desirable road. ref.L96. €255,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant, this mid terraced Puerto marino townhouse has been priced low purely for a quick sale. Briefly comprising of: 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Lounge-Diner, Independent Kitchen with Galleria, Porch area, Front tiled garden, Private gated Parking & the use of 2 large communal pools Ref. K22 €123,000 Tel 680333242 Gran Alacant villa located in a very quiet area , situated at the end of a cul-de-sac means there is no through traffic.3 bed, 3 bath, 330m2 plot, established large gardens, working fireplace, solar panel for hot water,private parking, south facing great views, fully furnished, fantastic opportunity. ref. L85. €215,000 Tel 680333242 English / Spanish / Russian estate agents require reasonably prices properties in

REMOVALS

the Torrevieja and Orihuela Costa area. Complete service including free conveyancing. Tel 647 218 350 www.sunnyspainproperties.com (79) Gran Alacant Town House with a difference. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Glazed in Porch, Quiet Location, Extra storage areas, and South Facing Private Pool as well as 2 communal pools. Fully Furnished, All mod cons. Greenland Views and all local amenities close by. Ref. No L79. 179.000 euros 680 333 242 Beach front Line property, over looks Carabassi Beach, Gran Alacant. 2 Bedrooms, 2 Bathrooms, Secure Underground Parking, Fully furnished, Roof Top Solarium. 3 Large Communal Pools, Fantastic communal Gardens, Tennis Courts and much more. 125.000 Euros Ref No. K23. Tel. 627 711 155

RESTAURANT EL TORO CARVERY. The Only 7 day a week carvery. Prices from just 5,50 €. Monday night Pie Night. Wednesday Night Spice Night. Friday Fish Night. Saturday Steak Night. Karaoke every Thursday night. Full A La Carte Menu. Carvery available evenings only (unless pre booked) from 6th till 31st Aug Mon to Friday. CV951 Road to Torremendo.. Call 633154038 for reservations. All types of Parties Occasions catered for. (79)

throughout the province of Alicante and Murcia. Essential Spanish and English speaking. To arrange an interview, call 966 090 762 (79)

SOLICITORS Need English Speaking Solicitors in Torrevieja? Let us help to solve your problems with debt recovery, divorce, property, accident claims, legalise land. Call us on 966 923 963, give us brief details and get in touch with your specialist solicitor.

VAN SPACE Van returning approx 10th November 2012 from UK , space available, good rates tel 965 326 920 / 666847648 beechdale@hotmail.co.uk (82)

WANTED

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Friday, August 24, 2012

Greenside Gossip IVIE DAVIES takes a weekly look at the golf scene - golfdavies@gmail.com

A SOCIETY WITH A DIFFERENCE HAVE you just moved to the Costa Blanca or Costa Calida? Are you on an "inspection visit"? Are you contemplating moving here? If so, may your dream home be ready on time; may it be devoid of any snags, may all the local facilities be immediately available to you; and may the sun permanently shine on you and yours. But let's consider the more important things in life. What are your golfing plans? If you want to play competitively on

the Costa Blanca and Costa Calida, the set-up here differs from that in your old life. Whereas membership of a club is essential to play regular competitive golf in the UK, here in Spain, membership of a Golf Society is well nigh essential. You may still wish to be a "member" of a golf club here, but that will almost certainly entail paying a 12-month g r e e n fee, giving you only playing rights on that course. Which Society?

TITTER ON THE TEE THREE friends were playing their regular Saturday morning round of golf. They were joined on the first tee by a woman, who proceeded to hook her drive into the bushes. The woman and her caddy went to look for the ball while the other three waited on the fairway. After about five minutes when the golfer and the caddy failed to reappear, the three others went in search of them only to find the caddy performing sex on the woman. "Get away from there,

you nasty fellow," the three others shouted. "Please, please, you don't understand," said the woman, "When we came into the bushes, my caddy suffered a heart attack and I was only trying to revive him." "But that's not how you revive someone when they suffer a heart attack!”, shouted the three others, "You have to give the person mouth-to-mouth resuscitation." "I know," retorted the golfer, "How the hell do you think this started?"

Well, how long is a piece of string? There are many from which to choose. In fact, you may wish to be a member of more than one. Here are a few considerations to contemplate. Large or small? There are several very large Societies, with membership in three figures. Equally there are many small Societies, with comparatively few members. Read the reports on their golf days which appear regularly in the weekly local papers for your area. From these reports you will soon determine the size of any Society - though, of course, some of the smaller ones - like that from your local bar - may not report their outings. Consider the contents of the reports as well. You will soon note, for example, that some of the larger (and possibly more popular and more successful) have very oversubscribed outings, so you may not be able to play just when it suits you. How often do you wish to play? Some Societies

standard. The more impor- membership. Most tant factors, like golf the Societies are able to negotiworld over, are knowledge of ate preferential green fees etiquette, the rules and the for their outings, often involvability to count! ing quite substantial savings. The social side. Again, Most Societies, although most Societies attempt to they may have a "home" have some social side, and course, play all over the would expect new members region and often have outto be prepared to enter into ings to courses outside the that side of things, as well as Costa Blanca/Calida region. playing. Enjoy your golf on the Ladies and/or couples. Costa Blanca or Costa There may be some men- Calida and remember that a only Societies, possibly golf lesson is any coaching; because they have evolved teaching or tutoring as a play weekly, or twice a that way rather than setting result of which a golfer manmonth, some play only out with that intention. Again, ages to eliminate the one monthly. read the reports in the press glaring fault that perfectly When do you wish to and judge for yourself. compensated for all his other play? Are you going to join Advantages of Society swing flaws! the lucky band of retired people and play whenever you wish, or will you have to work for a living? If the latter, you will have to determine which ONE key to hitting more powerful golf shots is keeping day of the week a particular your body behind the ball before impact. A premature lifting of the right foot during the downSociety plays and whether swing causes golfers to shift too much of their weight to that day suits your work comthe left side, resulting in a loss of power and distance. mitments. Don’t get me wrong, getting to the left side is crucial in Is membership open or the golf swing. One common flaw among amateurs is the can I play as guest? tendency to hang back on their right side without a propYour golfing standard. er weight shift. But the move to the left side must be Most Societies are happy to made in the proper sequence. have members of any golfing To keep from “leaving for the left” too early, anchor your right foot and avoid lifting it before contact. With your foot anchored, you’ll be able to ultimately fire more of your right side into the shot and maximize your power.

TIP OF THE WEEK

Friday, August 24, 2012

Stadium of Fright KEEPMOAT LOCK-IN WAS NO FUN IN THE SUN

OH dear, what can the matter be? Dear old Botty got stuck...well not in the lavatory, but in the Keepmoat Stadium, home of Doncaster Rovers and Doncaster Belles ladies football team, on a sunny August evening. Trouble was it was around 6pm last Saturday and I didn't fancy staying there as the sun set and nightfall came. So after shouting down the tunnel area and searching the other rooms I utilised the new emergency system for non-emergencies we have in dear old Blighty by dialing 101....we get more Yankified every day, don't we? Anyway a very nice lady answered. I explained my predicament and although she couldn't do anything immediately, she knew a man who could and started

the ball rolling to get hold of a keyholder. So, after being passed on to the real cops and explaining again, the rescue operation got under way. I put the phone down in reception and was contemplating the silence when I heard the sound of whirring

mechanism. Sure enough, after a little foray I found a gentleman busy Hoovering or cleaning the floor and once again explained my circumstances. He promptly went and got a set of keys, unlocked the door and I was a free man again. No helicopters, fire

current revamped stadium took shape. I and a fellow journo John Richardson were still beavering away as it approached 6pm. Then the floodlights went out, quickly followed by the lights in the Press Box and then a key grated in the lock on the door. I panicked, but the ultra cool Richardson, now of the Sunday Express, calmly picked up the phone in front of him and dialled NUFC's reception. A gentleman was promptly despatched up the metal spiral staircase to unlock the Press Box door and grant us our freedom! Happy Days - and it will be even happier days on Tyneside if Newcastle scoop

the Premier League title next May. I’ve fancied them for a long time and just the other day placed my £1 bet at a massive 125-1 - come on you Magpies! Before I go I believe I may upset a few people out on the Costa with my comments and reports on the Olympic Games. If that is the case well, tough. Live with it cos I meant every word I said! ( Oh, and I’ve thought of a new name for the Olympics, a displaced tournament without any meaning - the Ordinary Peoples' Games. That is exactly what they are and what the bulk of the competitors and certainly the audience at the stadiums, at home and anywhere else is distinctly ordinary.

No-go Carroll, vows Rodgers

The departing Ramiro on Diego's shoulders

GASCH AND CARRY COSTLY FOR TORRY FC Torrevieja completed their preseason warm up matches with a pulsating 1-1 draw at home to Orihuela CF last Saturday and it proved that both sides will be forces to be reckoned with this term. Orihuela took a first half lead direct from a well worked free kick. Torry responded with a second half display that left no one in any doubt that this team is capable of winning promotion this season - a clear and stated intent. There was a downside though, in that striker Gasch was the recipient of a harsh tackle which ended his game early and has ruled him out of Torry's opener at Acero this Saturday evening. The loss of Gasch for the opening game is indeed a blow, made worse by the news that fans favourite Ramiro will not be wearing the white and blue this year. The club has more than hinted that there will be one final signing - a player

engines or ambulances then, but next time I go to South Yorkshire I'm taking my own set of keys. I had been covering a game in the FA Women's Super League, Doncaster Belles v Chelsea to be precise. One nil to the Pensioners' girls as it happened. But it was what happened next that stole the show - I even ended up on Chorley FM radio talking about my lock-in. Now I do like lock-ins and believe me there are worse places than Doncaster to be locked in. But Saurday’s experience took me back almost 20 years – to the birds' nest of a Press Box at St James' Park, Newcastle long before the

with 2B status and in the mould of Prior, who was highly regarded last season until his enforced departure in December. As pen has not been put to paper yet, the club are not releasing his name, but fans should know his identity by the time they run out on Saturday. Finally, do not miss Torry's first league home game on Sunday 2 September, 6pm kick off. Entrance is 10 Euro for all, under 16s get in for free, but great value is a 90 Euro season ticket, which can be bought from the Torry Army office in San Luis or from SJ & A Digit.All in Calle Jose Hurtado Romero 17-19, Torrevieja. The six pre-season games resulted in 3 wins and three draws, but the serious business starts on Saturday - getting points on the board and making sure that Torry are at or near the head of the table all term in this pivotal season, where nothing less than promotion will be considered success.

LIVERPOOL manager Brendan Rodgers has claimed he would 'need to be a nutcase' to let striker Andy Carroll leave Anfield on loan. Rodgers hit out at Newcastle for trying to get Carroll - a player they sold to the Merseysiders for £35million in January 2011 - back on the cheap. The Reds boss, who had previously hinted a move could be on the cards, insisted he did not have enough depth in his squad to let the England striker leave without raising funds for a replacement. "There is absolutely no chance [of a loan deal] - and certainly not Newcastle," Rodgers said. "Newcastle got £35m for this player last year. To even consider wanting to take him on loan is a liberty really. "We have got a very small squad as it is. We have lost a lot of players this summer

NEWCASTLE LOAN BID A LIBERTY LIVERPOOL

and I have not replaced them, as of yet. That is the reality of where we are. "I need a minimum of three strikers. Once the window shuts, that is it until January. I have got (Luis) Suarez, Fabio Borini, and Andy Carroll. "I would need to be a nutcase even to consider at this moment to let Carroll go out, unless there are other solutions for that." Newcastle and other clubs were alerted to Carroll's potential availability in July when Rodgers suggested he would be open to a loan move for the 23-year-old if it "can benefit the club in the long term". However, the offer made by Newcastle reported to be a loan move with a view to a £12million permanent return to Tyneside with Liverpool still responsible for a sizeable chunk of his wages in the meantime has particularly irked Rodgers.

Scrum and join us! ITV Orihuela RFC start their pre-season training on August 28 after the summer break in preparation for the Murcia League season. The opening session will be at 20.30 at the Polidepotivo Palmeral, with a follow-up session on the beach at

Guardamar the following day at 19.00 - the far end away from the bars and restaurants. A further session will be held on Thursday August 30 at the Polideportivo Palmeral (20.30). For a things rugby, call Garry on 692 767 242.

Friday, August 24, 2012

SWANDERFUL!

Fledgling boss Michael is Laud of the wings SWANSEA CITY made me sit up and take lots of notice last Saturday. While the clever money as usual is on Manchester City, Manchester United or Chelsea to win the 2012/13 Premier League title I did like the quality of football served up by Michael Laudrup's men. Yes, Michael Laudrup's men because I would like to think he has put his own stamp on the Swans already after inheriting a great legacy from Brendan Rodgers. While Rodgers simmers after his new club Liverpool's embarrassment at West Brom on the same day, Laudrup saw an immediate return at Swansea as QPR were hammered 5-0 on their own patch. The Swans played some wonderful football whilst doing it and the finishing was top quality. Nathan Dyer's second goal especially was a beauty as he beat the offside trap with a lightning burst behind a defender to run onto a super pass and score. Now Swansea AREN'T going to win the Premier

STEVE BOTT reports

League this season but they could push on and do better than last season's laudable effort by edging nearer a Euro Cup qualifying place. Of the real title contenders, Chelsea's opening day win at Wigan was perhaps the most solid. Two goals up in seven minutes, the only surprise was that they didn't score more. Champions Manchester City wobbled against newcomers Southampton at home - at one stage going 2-1 down before yet another late show rescued the game and the points for them. Manchester United bolstered their bid to win back that title with the signing of Robin van Persie and have now added to that with the signature of defender Alexander Buttner - but the rest of football was laughing long and loud as usual as United went down 1-0 at Everton in a thrilling game that could easily have ended up 3-3 or 4-4. There's no doubting Rodgers has one of the biggest jobs in football right now as, quite frankly, Liverpool looked a mess at The Hawthorns. Unable to defend, they were made to look like monkeys by an average side who won 3-0 with ease and didn't need those penalty awards, justified or not.

The clowns descended on Luis Suarez, who wasted a whole host of chances. Take it from me, he WILL score goals again this season, but he is being pilloried at every opportunity by the PC brigade who didn't like his little spat with Patricia Evra. You can call me as many names as you want, I'll still get on with things and completely ignore you - so will Luis and John Terry! Fulham did a great demolition job on Norwich, too and I never write off Arsenal. They played some great stuff in the draw with Sunderland and I have a feeling new signings such as Santi Cazorla and Lukas Podolski will come good very soon. Fulham and Chelsea need to test themselves against better quality opposition and this weekend the Cottagers take on Manchester United at Old Trafford while Swansea have an easier task at home to West Ham. Chelsea take on my dark horses Newcastle United at home in one of the top two fixtures. The other should see Manchester City get right back on track with an easy three points and a bagful of goals at Anfield. And if Arsenal can come away with a win at Stoke, like I said, watch those Gunners go!