Volume 16 - Issue 4

ourna February 3, 1984

BELIZE

TNJ: hat do you think the prosp cts are for fair elec- ,.// tions 1n March in El Salvador?

Diaz-Aiejandro: .. . I think the U.S. public should be told that the Salvadoran situation is bad, very bad, and there are few heroes there.

----NICARAGUA

COSTA *San Jose

RICA Yale Professor Carlos F. Dlaz-Aiejandro Dissenting Member of the Kissinger Commission on Central America

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Reservations '77-5148 2 The New Journal/February 3, 1984

Publisher Hilary Callahan Editor-in-ChieJW. Hampton Sides Designer Tom McQuillen Photography Editor Christine Ryan Business Managers Robert Moore Peter Phleger Managing Editors Jim Lowe Morris Panner Production Manager Tony R eese Associate Business Managers Katie Kressmann Vanessa Sciarra Marilynn Sager Associate Editors Paul Hofheinz Laura Pappano Tina Kelley Katherine Scobey Mike Otsuka Associate Production Managers Lauren Rabin Christianna Williams Associate Photography Editor Jim Ayer• Staff Anne Applebaum Joyce Banerjee Nicholas Christakis Eduardo Cruz Mark Fedors• Andrea Fribush* Darren Gersh

Rob Lindeman • Dani Morrow Sally Sloan Amy Stevens Corinne Tobin Larry Goon Katie Winter•

*elected December 20, 1983 Members and Diuctors: Edward B. Bennett•• • Henry C. · Chauncey, Jr. • Peter B. Cooper • Andy Court • Brooks Kelley • Peter Neill • Michelle Press • Thomas Strong Board of Advisors: J ohn Hersey • Roger Kirwood • Elizabeth Tate Frieruls: Anson M. Beard,Jr.t • Edward B. Ben· nett, Jr. • Blaire Bennett • Jonathan M. Clark • Louise F. Cooper • James W. Cooper • Peter B. Cooperl • Jerry and Rae Court • Geoffry Fried • Sherwin' Goldman • Brooks Kelley • Andrew J . Kuzneski, Jr. • Lewis E. Lehrman • E. Nobles Lowe • Peter NeilJ • Fairfax C. Randallt • Nicholas X. Rizopoulos • Arleen and Arthur Sage.r • • Dick and Debbie Searst • Richard Shields ' Thomas Strong • Alex and Betsy Torello • Allen · and Sarah Wardwell • Daniel Yergin • •elected October 27, 1983 •new friend thas given a second time (Volume 16, Number 4) 1M Nt:Wjownrol is publi>hed 1ix times during the: sc.hool year by the New journal at Yale, Inc., POll Office Box 3432 Yale Station. New Haven, CT 06~20.

Copyright 1983 by the New Journal at Yale, Inc. All righ11 rcserv~ Reproduction either in whole or in part without wriuen permission of tM publisher and edhor·in--chid is prohibited This magaz.inc is pubhshed by Yale College scu<k:ncs, and Yak Univenity is not responsible for ilt conccn1s.

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Cover photo by Chris Ryan Cover by Tom McQuillen

TheNewjournal

The New Journal

February 3, 1984

=-==.=..=.~----.:....:.:.; Vol~um e~16.N~umb~ er 4

L.-.----------'

Features 10

An I nterview with Carlos Diaz-Alejandro A Cuban-hom Yal' ~conomist and dissmting munber of th~ Kissing" Commission on Cmtral Amrnca discussu th~ issues rais~d by tM r«mtly-rtltas~d rtport.

18

The Land D own Under Th~

26

subUrran«<n world of th~ sltam

/unn~ls.

H.D.: The Making of a Poet Th~ rol~

of two Yale profusors in pushing a pOtt to

prominmc~.

Books

35

Taming the Nuclear Leviathan Yale political scimtist Paul Brackm's Command and Control of Nuclear Forces points to IM w~ak links in tht chain of command.

4

Letters

6

Between the Vines

8

NewsJoumal

38

Afterthought

The New journal/February 3, 1984 3

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The New Joumal thanks Christina Baker Rich Blow Drew Brodey Bernadine Connelly Mandy Katz Pam Koffier Andrea Massey Liz Rourke Jim Salzman Richard So Dave Stem Pam Thompson Ed W asserman 4 The New Journal/February 3, 1984

The POR Feuds To the Editor: I suppose the appetite of your readers for rehashing old POR feuds is limited.

I know mine is. But while we're on the subject, let the record show that Wendell Bird's 1976 "purge" of thirty members was illegal and void, and that Bird was duly censured, impeached and removed from office within a week. As for musical bedrooms and all those other lurid goodies, most of Bird's charges were exaggerated, and the rest were nonsense- no Party member, in my four years at Yale, sang Nazi songs.

The Party has its share of turkeys and flakes, ·maybe more than its share. But through it, I made dear friends , encountered new ideas and lost some eminently losable illusions. What more can a student group give? I look forward to attending the Banquet this winter.

Sincerely, Richard Brookhiser Editor, National Review Sometime Chairman

No Animosity T o the Editor: As the Chairman and Secretary of the Tory Party of the Yale Political Union, we read with great interest the recent article concerning the Party of the Right (TNJ, December 9, 1983). We must strongly protest, however, the reference to the Tory Party as "the POR's bitter enemy in the Political Union." Although we sometimes disagree with the Party of the Right about matters of Political Union policy,

we fully recognize that it meets the needs of an important constituency at Yale. Since the purpose of the Tory Party is to provide a forum for political i:liscussion, no possible reason exists for animosity between it and any other party in the Political"Union. Suggestions of bitterness between the two groups can only help create the. situation they describe.

Very truly yours, Walter C. Wagner, Chairman Alan D. Viard, Secretary

A Biased Approach To the Ed.itor: As a former editor of The New journal, I was thoroughly disheartened, while reading Anne Applebaum's article on the Unification Church in New Haven (TN}, December 9, 1983), to see the amount of non-professionalism that your publication now deems acceptable.

Miss Applebaum's piece was predicated throughout on the assumption that Moon's followers are ridiculous and not worthy of serious consideration. In fact, the very title of the article reveals its slant: it u$es the term 'Moonies', an appellation considered derogatory to members of the Unification Church.

Would you be willing to print an article about New Haven's J~wish community entitled "Yids at Yale"?

To cite only one other egregious instance of Miss Applebaum's biased approach, she periodically characterizes the Moon followers she interviewed as being "very pleased to meet you." Her snide repetition o f the phrase is obviously meant to evoke the popular image of Unification Church members as bland, mindless automatons. While I

m-mmort OD§UDdiiJ§ Come in for Archie Moore's Sunday Brunch.

You will be delighted with our ever changing menu.

Try our Ginger bread pancakes, homemade sausage, --...- · Rumaki, Omelets, and Eggs Aurora en bouche, and lots m-m-more! have no more love for the Reverend Moon than anyone else, I do not think it fair for his organization to be publically examined by an observer who has no concept of impartiality. The Ntw Journal must learn to distinguish between true investigation and a supercilious gawking at others from a position of presumed superiority.

James Romm · Princeton, New Jersey

Art:hie Moorei from II a.m. till 1 a.m. free parking exit 6 off 1-91 18814 Willow St., New Haven 773-9870

The Hollywood Connection

Bob Cardinal's To the Editor: Your article on the Yale connection to "'War Games" ( TNJ, September 9, 1983) only told part of the story. Director John Badham went to Yale, but so did the writers who created the whole idea and perservered through several years of endless Hollywood "yes-and-no's"- Laurence Lasker and Walter Parkes.

The omission deserves special correction in this publication, as Larry Lasker wrote memorably for The New J ournal in its first year of existence, and was subsequently its editor. So there is life after Yale.

Sincerely, Daniel Yergin Cambridge, MA

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T he New J ournaVFebruary 3, 1984 5

Between the Vines/W. Hampton Sides '

Shaving Cream on the Floor (and other acts of violence) It is a sluJme to IJu scholar if IUs tranquility, amid dangerous timu, arisu from IJu pruumptio, that . . . his is a proJut~d el4Ss; or if M sales a kmporary JKau by the dioersion of his thoughts from politics or w;ad questions, hiding his h~ad like an ostnch in the flowering bushes, fJteping into microscofJts and turning rhymes, as a boy whistlts to keep his courage up.

Ralph WafÂŽ Emmon

The American Scholar Address Cambridge, /83 7

8Mper Schlavone/The New Joumal

OriginaUy, this was going to be a student manifesto. It was going to say that Yal~ doesn't give a damn about its students anymore. It was going to talk about how this university is losing its soul and the spark of youth. Yes, my manifesto was going to talk about the joy of being a colle&e kid, the joy of tequila shots a nd the Saybrook Strippers on cold November Saturdays, and road trips to Long Island and frisbee 6 The New JournaVFebruary 3, 1984

on President Giamatti's lawn at three in the morning. It was going to be about the perfect oddity of24 glasses of flat beer lined up on Cross Campus on a spring day, the kidnapping of the Ezra Stiles moose, the colo red armies on Bladderball afternoons, or the midnight my freshman year when 5,000 Yale students emerged from their windows during exam week in a staged event known as the Communal Groan, yeUing, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!"

Yale, my manifesto would have said, is suffocating us, turning us into old people before our time. We were forfeiting our bright college years, refusing them, postponing them, and here we were peeping into microscopes and turning rhymes and forgetting how to laugh in our race to adulthood.

We were succumbmg to the fretful preprofessionalism of our time, the academic pressure and the conservative career worry that Yale fans in our faces. And now we the Young People were taking the punches, not delivering them, like middle-aged prizefighters stumbling against the ropes.

Ironically, what prevented me from writing the manifesto was my own selfconsciousness about sounding young.

It seemed a juvenile thing to do, drawing battle lines in a place so nearly perfect as Yale. It was then that I reaJized.the truth, that the adversary of our youth is not Yale, but ourselves.

At Yale we accelerate the process of growing up. Our lust for maturity has much to do with an image so many of us have of ourselves, the image of a sophisticated ctttzen, politicized, cultured, full of arguments, adroit with the Sunday Times. We rush to be that citizen. So we do not occupy ourselves in the same way that students at most universities do. We do not join fraternities or sororities; rather, we join The Prisoner Film Society and the Coalition Against Apartheid. Yale is our grounding in matured elitism, where we learn to make lunchdates. Perhaps Design by Katie Wlntel

it is a good thing, this attitude we develop at Yale, but what happens to our youth in the process?

Ah, how important it is to be young.

How important it is to deposit a certain amount of shaving cream in an inconvenient place, at least once, and to assassinate each other with rubber darts. How indispensible it was, my sophomore year, when we plotted an elaborate scheme to steal the bladderball from Phelps Gate, with steel cable, pulleys and a getaway car. Or, the time four years ago when a group of my friends broke into Sterling Library late one night and turned on a few dozen strategically-located lights in the windows of the stacks. They spelled an incandescent four-letter word over York Street, photographed this magificent expletive, and gave the picture to our dean as a birthday present. How utterly vital it is to do these things, if for no other reason that because there is no reason at all. It is our youth striking back.

It ts often forgotten that Yale

students are also human beings and that they have tbeir own.growing up to contend with somewhere in between James Joyce and freshman chemistry.

I think the pressure we heap upon ourselves to be adults during the week pushes us to extremes on the weekend.

It makes us compress our immaturity into a limited time frame.

Which brings me to the question of student violence. There has been much talk recently about the subject, thanks largely to a new group known as Yale Students Against Violence by Yalies.

The group has come forward to denounce the intolerable number of violent deeds perpetrated by Yale students. Though the group seems to focus a disproportionate amount of attention on shaving cream and fire extinguishers and other petty white crimes, it has raised a serious issue.

Any of us who have ever seen a gutted entryway on the morning after or who have known someone who has been raped must feel the same revulsion and infuriation that this group feels.

But something puzzles me about this group's rhetoric. It is, I think, the assumption that Yale, unlike other collections of human beings, should somehow enjoy immunity from the cruder elements of human nature. "We offer you an opportunity," their literature reads, "to join in the creation of a community in which these occurrences are not tolerated." Co-founder Ken Dauber echoes this view in the YDN: "We hope to create a new culture where people who are violent will be embarrassed and others are repulsed by their violence. We want to change . the culture. When people are rowdy and others cannot study, that's violence . . . We're not concerned with the degree of violence; we just want to stop it."

How dangerously arrogant it is to think that Yale should be a perfect place, a place where things don't have to be "tolerated." What a terrifying denial of reality to think that going to any unversity for four years could cure people of their own nature . What puzzles me is that anyone should be surprised that Yale students behave like other students sometimes do, that they sometimes collapse into rage, irrationality, immaturity or meanness.

This is a subtle form of elitism that I

am afraid most of us share to some extent: the idea that Yalies make better neighbors, fuller humans, and that Yale is, or should be, a utopian community. It is reinforced every year when the President of Yale presents this lofty arrogance in some packaged form to the freshman class. "If at Yale you can experience the joy that the acquisition and creation of knowledge for

its own sake brings," wrote President Giamatti last September, "the adventure will last your whole life and you will have discovered the distinction between living as a full human being and merely existing."

What worries me about Yale Students Against Violence by Yalies, as much as I applaud their efforts, is that our crusade against "rowdiness" may be a sign that we have bought the rhetoric from on high. We should never let anyone convince us that we are a protected class, sliced from the inferior bulk of humanity, and thrown into an academic village where we are obligated to grow up overnight.

That is what my manifesto would have said, anyway.

â&#x20AC;˘

W Hampton Sides, a senior in Ezra Stiles, is Editor-in-Chief of TNJ. "'fbr opinioRJ expreac:d in this acct'on arc tho.c of the individual writer.

The New Journal/February 3, 1984- 7

NewsJournal

Pln·up Blues When a calendar bearing provocative photographs of 12 Yale women appeared in 1982, many people were upset. The controversy even spilled over into the pages of the Yale Daily News when several of the models who had posed for the calendar wrote that their photographs had been misused. .But the creators of the Daughters of Yale Calendar may have quietly gotten into even deeper trouble than this public dispute. A year and a half later, they still haven't paid most of their bills-which may amount to as much as $10,000 of outstanding debt on the now worthless 1983 calendar. The photographer, S.M. Cooper, whose work has appeared on the cover of Genesis albums, says he is still owed $400. Mary Ann Rumney of the prestigious graphic arts firm Rumney Schiffer which designed the .calendar, says she still has outstanding receipts for for "over $2000" of work. Bill

D A U G H T E R S

were ."poor," adding that few bookstores even bothered to select the calendar for sale from Inland's catalogue.

Meanwhile, Becker has left the country, making it difficult for his creditors to work out a financial solution to their problem. Last January, he went to Israel for three weeks. He was in California for a while in the spring, but last September he was back in New Haven on his way to Europe where he is "wandering around," according to his father . He says he hears from his son occasionally, though he doesn't know when- or if- his son Doug will return to New Haven.

Rothman has stayed in New Haven where she worked as a waitress for a while. When Becker was here in September, she sold her share of American Ivy to him and says she suspects he will dissolve the company when he returns to the United States.

•

Paul Hojheinz

O .F

YALE

Josline of Eastern Press, which printed A Case for Quarantine? over 10,000 copies of the full-color, The case of a New Haven prostitute glossy calendar, says Eastern has whose one-year-old infant · is being received only one third of the money it treated for AIDS in a special ward at is due. Finally, the state of Delaware, Yale-New Haven Hospital continues where American Ivy, Inc. is incor- to perplex health officials and medical porated to produce the calendar, says authorities alike. Since The New journal the company owes $49 in back taxes. broke the story in December ("Lana: A When Douglas Becker '81 and Amy Story of Scarlet Letters and Public Rothman began producing a parody of Risks"), the legal and ethical dilemma pin-up calendars ·in 1981, they thought posed by this I. V . drug-abusing AIDS they had a sure bet. The idea was to carrier has received national attention. depict models from Yale in various CBS News is now working on a 60 stereotypes ranging from punk to prep- Minutes segment about the special py. Becker. would handle the financial AIDS case which should be aired later arrangements and Rothman would this month.

M·eanwhile, a state legislator in oversee the artistic and creative work.

The calendar never sold very well. Hartford has proposed a piece of Most of the 10,000 copies were still in a legislation- as a response to this warehouse last April when the dis- case- that would empower health tributor, Inland Books, received per- department officials to quarantine cermission from Rothman to throw them tain individuals who present a out. D avid Wilks, who oversaw . the "deathly" threat to public health in distribution for Inland, said that sales Connecticut. Richard Tulisano

(D-Rocky Hill), Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee, believes the quarantine statutes now on the books must be altered to address the unique epidemiological problems which , he believes, AIDS has presented in certain instances like this one. "We need a way to protect the public," Tulisano .told TN]. "This woman has a communicable condition and may be infecting lots of people.

She may be creating a major health hazard."

Tulisano's new quarantine proposal is fashioned after the civil commitment statutes of Connecticut which enable authorities to detain certain individuals, usually mentally-disturbed patients, who present a clear and present danger to others and to themselves. He wants to add to the commitment criteria anyone who has a communicable disease and who "presents a clear mortal threat" to the community .

"I'm concerned about the woman's rights," said Tulisano, "but I'm more concerned about the community's right to public health. My legislation will address isolated in<#viduals. It's not aimed at homosexuals or any other group. I don't want it to be used as a tool . of oppression."

While the legislators and civil liberties attorneys in Hartford ponder the legalities of quarantine, the woman continues to work on the streets to support herself and her $200-a-day heroin dependency. And as the health department; the police d~partment and the physicians all argue, there is very little that can be done about the situation without violating her rights. Yale Chaplain, John V annorsdall may be the only person who has offered a way out of the impasse. With the assistance of Paul Keane, Vannorsdall has proposed to her that money could be raised through Yale channels to keep her off the streets, pay her rent and grocery bill and secure her a full-time counselor. He has also proposed that a special half-way house of sorts could be located to accommodate her and others who may be in a "similar predicament." But the woman appears to be unwilling to accept V annorsdall's proposal. "We don't, indeed we can't, do anything without her participation," explained Vannorsdall. "The prob-

8 The New J ournal/February 3, 1984

...

-lem is one of not wanting to force something on her. We've tried very much to protect her rights, but we need her cooperation."

••- W

Hampton Sides

Tang Runs Dry It was the only University-sanctioned event of its kind, an inter-collegiate beer drinking competition which began in the 1940s and became an integral part of the annual Yale Spring Weekend.

But on December 9th the Council of Masters rejected the JCSC's proposal for a modified Tang competition, thereby officially cancelling Tang once and for all. "It didn't seem to us that a drinking event was the kind of activity that a university should be putting itself · behind," Chairman of the Council of Masters Robin Winks explained. Well, fair enough, especially in light of the recently enacted legal drinking age of 20. But many feel that the dissolution of Tang leaves a hole in the social fabric of under_graduate tradition.

The JCSC Qoint Council of Social Chairpersons),which ran the event, has considered several alternatives, but none of them qualified as a satisfactory substitute. Ezra Stiles sophomore Ben Eason, a new JCSC Co-Chairperson, went so far as to propose tanging with root beer, but the Tang people "wouldn't go for it." Milk Tang was vetoed as "unhealthy." Apparently, Tang just isn't the same without alcohol.

But as long as Tang included alcohol, the University feared that it was sponsoring an illegal activity. "I think it's fair to say that if there hadn't been abuse of it in the past, Tang wouldn't be dead," explained Master Winks. "It's clear that the students who ran it did not take seriously the laws of the state."

If the Masters are concerned about observing the legal drinking age, one may ask, then why can't the event simply be moderated to exclude students under 20? JCSC Chairperson Ming Tsai presented just such a proposal in November to the Council of Masters outlining strict regulation of Tang events, but it was rejected outright.

"The reason· Tang was voted down wasn't because of the drinking age,"

Chris Ryan/The New Joumel

claimed Tsai. "After talking to a couple are planning underground Tang of masters I realized that the issue is tournaments for the spring. There has that the University doesn't feel it should been talk of trying to set up something sanction the event." formal at Toad's, or at the bastion of A. Bartlett Giamatti has made his Yale tradition, Mory's. position on the issue clear. "I'm not antiBut at least one master believes that traditional," Giamatti explained. "But a the responsibility belongs to Yale and tradition which somehow says the not necessarily to the students. "I'll tell University is going to provide free beer you one thing," Timothy Dwight and practice space for the sole purpose Master Robert Thompson said, "this is of drinking fast does not strike me, in going to make me fight for a Student the climate which we are in, as a tradi- Union Center-a place where you tion the University ought to cling to. would have large dances and other Frankly, it's very hard to defend Tan_g ." social activities. I think Yale owes you Despite the efforts of the administra- one. They took Tang away; something tion to stop Tang, it is sure to continue must be given." ' in some form. In several colleges "secret" practices are held in students' rooms, and a number of Tang captains - Christina Bakr

•

The New Journal/February 3, 1984 9

An Interview with Morris Panner with Charles V\brtman Carlos F. Diaz-Alejandro, professor of economics at Yale and an expert on Latin American economic development, served fo r the last six months as a Reagan appointee on the National Bipartisan Commission on Central America, better known as the K issinger Commission. Since the release of the Commission's report onJanuary 10, anarysts have been debating its meaning and its recommendations for extensive military and economic aid to Central America.

The onry point of agreement i~ that the Commission has generated an unexpected amount of controversy. InJury 1983, when the White House announced Diaz-AleJandro's appointment, the anti-Castro Cuban exile community in this country accused D iazAleJandro, who describes himself as a liberal democrat, of being a Castro sympathizer and supporter and demanded his r,emoval. DiazAleJandro had, infact, visited Cuba once in 19 7 7 on an academic trip as a guest of the Central Committee of the Cuban Communist Party and again in 1978 on a more political trip with the "Group of 75" to seek the release of Cuban political prisoners and the reunification offamilies. It was rumored f or several days inJury that the Diaz-Alejandro choice had been a case .of mistaken identity and that the White House would replace him. But after the F. B. I. granted him a security clearance, Diaz-Ale.fandro was sworn in with the other 11 members of the commission at the White House on August 10.

After the report's release, Diaz-Alejandro again emerged as a controversial figure. H e played an important role in securing the inclusion in the report of a "conditionality clause" which advocates that all U.S. aid to the nations in the region be conditioned upon demonstrated progress in human rights. This clause was considered a set-back for the administration, which rejects any linkage of aid with human rights. Diaz-Ale.fandro also added a statement of dissent to the report, advocating that the U.S. should end all aid to the rebels in Nicaragua, the Contras.

Mom's Panner, Managing Editor of TNJ, and Charles Wortman, a fourth-year graduate student in economics, spoke with Diaz-Alejandro at his offices in Columbia University, where he is spending this year as a visiting professor.

10 The New Journal/February 3, 1984

Ctlrta Ryanlnte New Joum el

"The Kissinger position is that a Marxist-Leninist triumph in El Salvador would be very, very serious for U .S . security interests. I would argue that this is an exaggeration."

l Carlos Diaz-Aiejandro

TNJ : G ive n th e fact th at you have no experience in com missions like this one an d that y ou're a liberal de m ocrat, why d id you accept t he post?

Diaz-Alejandro: W ell, I rehearsed reasons to sa y "n o." One reason to say "no" was that th e com m ission was an abomination n a m ed by a presiden t I did not like v ery much an d headed by a person whom I was n ot very enthusiastic abou t a t the time. But this d id not sound very con vincin g because if I h ave something to say o n Cen tral America , it did g ive me a p latform.

T he second reason to say "no" was that I'm an academic. "M y kingdom is not of this wo rld ." But that sounded a little wimpy, so I re luctantly said "yes."

TNJ: Did the allegations o f you r connections to Castro cause a ny con flict with your fellow commission members?

Diaz-Alejandro: I th ink m y colleagues were at first unsure. Back in August at coffee break s I would occassion ally end u p talking to a ch a ir. But that may have just b ee n m y paranoia. Very quickly people got very friendly and at the end we had a great deal of se n atorial courtesy.

TNJ : You said in July you were warned that Kissinger was "the great seducer." H as you r experience confirmed this?

D iaz-Alejandro : I'm neither a priest nor a psych oana lyst, so I'm not going to comme nt either o n his personality or whether h e d oes or d oesn't have trouble with his immo r tal soul. But what I can sa y is that he was a very good chairman . One thing which he does which is very appe aling to an academic is think in terms of m odels, structures.

Now you can h a ppen to d isagree with the validity o f a lot of his models, but it's an interestin g experience to discuss them with h im.

TNJ : Did you thin k th e commission as a whole had a po litical b ias?

Diaz-Alej andro : W e ll, it was named

by Preside nt R eagan . Obviously,

Courtesy Carlos Ol az¡Aie)andro

The Kissinger Commission

President Carter would have n a m ed a very differen t commissio n .

TNJ Would it have wr itten a b etter report?

Diaz-Alejandro: O h , yes, I would have thought so. Obvio usly, a n y document of this sort is a creature of compromise. We all h ad our special pet expertise. It was worth compromising about.

TNJ : How would you evaluate the competency of your fellow commissioners on Latin American issues?

Diaz-Alejandro: Hmmm . . . It was not an exper t group. An analogy to this group is a jury, a sor t o f reasonably intelligent g r ou p of laymen. No women, so one doesn't have to say laypersons. This was a group presumably with an op en mind to the evidence, an d the report is suitably modest in po inting this out.

TNJ: Would you call the report an instruction manual for your average con gressman?

Diaz-Alejandr o : Yes. Exactly. That's a good p h rase. And to the enlightened citizen who wants to read something about Central America witho u t h aving to b u y lots of books. But th e Congress a nd other movers of public o p inion a re the main target.

TNJ: I n the report you state that you spent only six days in Centr al America a n d a n other three days in Mexico and Venezuela. How d id this limited travel affect the outcome of your report?

Diaz-Alejandro : Don't forget that a lot of the people on the commission are extremely busy and couldn't spend much time traveling. We talked to many Central and Latin Americans in Washington. Now the trip itself was very useful. Specifically, two days were most valuable. One in San Salvador was, I think, very influential, and I always say it was my proudest day as a member of th e commission. That day, at least some of my conservative colleagues really became increasingly outraged, realizing that the death squads really existed and that they were not an invention of the liberal imagination. I think it opened their eyes to that. The other day which I would say was particularly useful was the day in San Jose (Costa Rica). Maybe it's fair to say that it was th e day fo r liberals to learn. The Costa R icans are very concerned about what's going on in Nicaragu a, and they feel that the trends there are increasingly alarming.

They of course were very anti-Samoza, and they or iginally supported the revolution in Nicaragua.

TNJ : Did you speak to d'Aubuisson The New Journal/February 3, 1984 11

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(President of El Salvador's National Assembly and reputed leader of the death squads)?

Diaz-Alejandro: Yes. TNJ: What was your impression of him?

Diaz-Alejandro: Well, he's a capable, able demagogue. Very smart; frighteningly able. But I wouldn't like to have him as chairman of my department.

TNJ: What was your experience like during your day in Nicaragua?

Diaz-Alejandro: The morning was useful, and I should say that we had an excellent briefing by the United States Ambassador to Nicaragua, Anthony C. Quainton. We talked to people from La Prensa, the opposition newspaper in -Nicaragua, and we talked to the archbishop, who is a very impressive man. The afternoon with the government was not very useful, I thought, because it ended up being a shouting match. I think neither side should be very proud of what happened there.

TNJ: Did you have enough time in your visits to these countries to get both sides of the political question, both the right and the left?

Diaz-Alej a ndro: In a very hectic, messy way, yes.

TNJ : I ask about your ability to judge popular opinion because in the report the commission makes the rather sweeping statement that the guerillas in El Salvador have relatively little support. H ow did you make that determination?

Diaz-Al ej a ndro: After talking to a lot of people, I've come to believe that.

Who knows how many votes the Marxist left would get in an election? But that seems to be a consensus among a lot of Salvadoran observers. Maybe the point can be made by comparison.

The Sandanista-led revolution in N icaragua was very broad. It involved a lot of different people, a nd most people agreed tha t it had a tremendous degree of popular support. Back in the old days, the Castro-led insurgency was also a broad revolution which had enormo"!s support. Both were fighting clearly delineated powers, Batista and Samoza. Now in El Salvador most of the guerrillas certainly have M arxist elements. They don't have any obvious power they're fighting. And the alternatives to Marxism, like J ose Napoleon Duarte (President of the C h ristian Democratic Party in El Salvador), I would probably guess could win any fai r election against a n y com petition.

T NJ : The repor t d istingu ishes between ' a n indigenous a nd a nonindigenous revolution, asserting that the for mer should be accepted by the United States regardless of the political system the revolution brings with it.

Would you consider the E l Salvadoran guerrillas indigen ous revolutionaries?

D ia z-Alejand r o : They have profound indigenous roots. I don't like them th at much, but it has to be recognized that the guerrillas in El Salvador have predominantly indigenou s roots. But they've also become connected with Nicaraguan, Cuban, and Soviet support. The cliche in El Salvador which everybody agrees to is that El Salvador "needed" a revolution. Very badly,

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We all had ou r pet expertise." even as G u atemala "needs" a revolution. T he d ifficulty intellectually is that if we all agree that Guatemala needs a revolution, how big a r isk are we going to take in seeing that revolution come to pass? Because it would be nice if they had a good o ld democratic revolutio n , but I would not think it was so nice if they had a Marxist-Leninist revolution.

TNJ : What do you think the prospects are for fair elections in March in El Salvador?

Dia z-Alej and ro: I'm cautiously pessimistic. If there's hope of some sensible solution in El Salvador, it has to come out of the March elections. I think the U.S. public should be told that the Salvadoran situation is bad, very bad, and there are few heroes there.

TNJ : What would be the consequences should the March e lections fail?

Diaz-Alejandro: There are man y ways of painting failures. Duarte could win a nd the right could cheat him out of it like they did in 1972. There could be assassinations, God forbid. T here could be a fraud that Jed to a d'Aubuisson victory. I find it very hard to believe that d'Aubuisson could win a n y honest election. AIJ these things would end El Salvador's future. Under those conditions I think the U.S. must cut ofT any aid- military or economic.

U nder those conditions there's just nothing to build upon.

TNJ: Will Congress reach the same conclusion?

Diaz-Alejandro: The conditionality clause is so strong that those who read it fairly will get the poin t. The conditionality clause is very u nambiguous.

TNJ: What was you r reaction to Larry Speakes' · sta teme n t, before the report was eve n released , that P residen t

Reagan would be "inclined to ignore" any conditionality of military aid on human rights?

D iaz-Alejandro: The Speakes' statement was just plain stupid, and the administration backed down from it. The President was specifically very gentlemanly in saying that he would look into it and would keep an open mind. The administration has to. The President wilJ just have to take back his pocket veto. I think he made a very serious error in that. So I think they realize that without conditionality there won't be any aid to El Salvador and indeed to any of the other countries.

TNJ : What would be the repercussions of ending aid to El Salvador?

D iaz-Alejandro: One can imagine many bad sequences of events- first victory by the extreme right and then victory by the extreme left. It would not be good for the Salvadorans nor terribly good for U.S. interests. It's something the U.S. could live wit h, though, I think.

TNJ: Even if that meant a Sandan istatype government in El Salvador?

Diaz-Alejand ro: Yes. That's one of the issues we debated, and there were obvious disagreements. The Kissinger position is that a Marxist-Leninist triumph in El Salvador would be very, very serious for U.S. security interests.

I would argue that this is an exaggeration. The U.S. still has many friends. I like a phrase which I think Lane Kirkland (president of the AFL-C IO) used, that we just have to find "higher ground," and the U.S. can find higher ground in Central America.

T NJ : What is that higher ground?

Dia z-Alej a ndro: Certainly Costa Rica, certainly Panama, certainly Hondu ras, and certainly even Belize if they want the U.S., and last but not least countries like Colombia, M exico

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and Venezuela who would become seriously concerned about their own security. There is still a lot of earth between Central America and the U.S. TNJ: Do you think one of the keys to this is working with the Contadora Group (a diplomatic alliance among Colombia, Mexico, Panama and Venezuela) and some of the surrounding nations?

Diaz-Alejandro: Yes, that would be extremely helpful. But it should not be used as an excuse for not doing anything. I think the U.S., the biggest country and the one with the most r esources, has to take the leadership.

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TNJ: What is your reaction to the view among students against military aid to ·El Salvador and against military involvement in the region altogether?

Diaz-Alejandro: If they are serious about finding out what's going on in Central America before they jump to wearing buttons, they should not just write the l:J .S. presence off, but talk to a Costa Rican, talk to a Venezuelan and get the whole nuanced picture of what's going on.

TNJ : What do you think the chances are that today's students will end up fighting in Central America?

Diaz-Alejandro: I think the chance is too high for comfort. Yes, I'm afraid I'd have to strike that pessimistic note.

The chances are still much too high.

TNJ: Do•you think war will be averted if the report is followed?

Diaz-Alejandro: I would not have signed it otherwise. Someone said it was a blueprint for war. I hope it's a blueprint for peace.

TNJ: In one of your written objections to the report you state, if I read it correctly, that aid to the Nicaraguan rebels should not be stopped but should be made overtly by the U.S. government.

Diaz-Alejandro: I should have written more carefully . I think military aid should be stopped at once for the very

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TNJ: No aid whatsoever to the rebels?

Diaz-Aleja ndro: None whatsoever. I find both cover t and overt aid equally objectionable.

TNJ : The problem of debt plagues not only Central America but many countries in South America. The Internation al Monetary F u nd (IMF) has recom mended strict austerity measures in order to reschedule the debt. H ow d o you reconcile these recommendations with the committee's report that advocated an across the board increase in living standards in Central America?

Diaz-Alejandro : Austerity should at best b e viewed as a very temporary stage. P eople may be surprised to know that there was almost unanimity within the commission, not to mention among the sen ior counselors (who included Congressman J ack K emp), in saying that the stabilization plans with which man y Central and Latin Amer ican cou ntries h ave been saddled overemphasize austerity and underemphasize growth. So if this is to be interpreted as a backhan ded criticism of the IMF, it is. But in fairness, then you just h ave to have more resou rces.

That's why we recommend such an ambitiou s economic program.

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TNJ : Without th e IMF wou ld there have to be some sort of arm twisting by the U.S. government to get bankers to accep t the stabilization plan for Centr al America?

Diaz-Alejand ro: Well, if anything close to the aid program we recommen ded gets approved, we won't need that arm twisting because then essentially th e U.S. would be providing such resources that banks would feel much more relaxed.

TNJ : G iven your personal recommendatio n that American markets should be opened to Central American exports, is it realistic to . expect a The New J ou rnal/February 3, 1984 15

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beleaguered American economy to accept that?

Diaz-Alejandro: What is very big for Central America may be very small for the U.S. The program we recommend is $8 billion in five years. Now $1.6 billion per year is .8 percent of the U.S. deficit. It's not going to make this country go broke, but that represents big money for Central America.

TNJ: Who do you think would be the best president to handle the problems in Central America?

Diaz-Alejandro: Fritz Mondale, no doubt about it. Partly. because he had the experience with Carter and he was sympathetic to the Carter approach, I think Mondale would be much better than any Republican.

TNJ: Many have claimed that the rhetoric of the report sounds very much like President Reagan. Do you think this report will help him get reelected?

Diaz-Alejandro: You really think so?

The New York Times keeps on saying that. It certainly wasn't our intention.

The sad truth is that by November it will probably be forgotten at the level of most voters so that, no, I don't think I've gotten many votes for Reagan rth the report.

TNJ: After reading the report, I came away with the impression that the dominant issue in the region had to do with the East-West conflict and that this was where we were going to make our stand. Do you think this will be the impression in Congress?

Diaz-Alejandro: I was worried about that. I would have hoped that there was enough there about the history of the region even before Castro began to rule Cuba to try to offset that. The report at several points emphasizes that the roots of the Central American problem go back to the colonial days.

On the other hand there is also a bit of truculent Cold War rhetoric which I was very uncomfortable with, although I became sufficiently convinced that it shouldn't be dismissed completely. But the report probably exaggerates that. I still like to argue that if one reads the

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report that one should come out with the impression that it is predominantly an internal problem which is exacerbated by some East-West mucking about.

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TNJ : Many observers predicted that something like the emphasis on the East-West confrontation in the region could lead you and the other liberal members of the commission to file a minority report. How was such a report avoided?

Diaz-Alejandro: By the conditionality clause. And by the changes in some of the rhetoric. You should have seen some of those earlier drafts. In that sense, the final outcome was better than my worst fears. The conditionality clause is a very strong point. It's obvious I worried a lot about this Cold War rhetoric, and I worried with some dear friends in the commission. But we kept on saying, "Should we go ahead and junk the whole report and write a minority report?" The counter to that was to say, "Well, look, what's the operational significance of the rhetoric if one puts in a very strong conditionality clause?" The Congress is not going to pass resolutions saying that the basic nature of the conflict is EastWest versus indigenous. They're going to say, "Well, if we g ive aid, under what conditions?" Were we right?

History will tell.

' }'L' \ Q)

TNJ : Do you have plans of becoming an undersecretary of state in a future administration?

Din-Alejandro : No. I kept on saying I was going to become an Hispanic Kissinger. After serious reflectionit's kind of fun to fly on those Air Force jets and not to have to go through customs and to banter with the great.

But, no, I think if's good to be an academic. Being on the commission wasn't too bad, but being there all the time . . . no.

•

Morris Panner, a smior in Ezra Stiks, is Managing Editor of TN]. Editorial assistance provided by Charles Wortman, a fourth year graduate studmt in economics and Tony Reese, Production Manager of TN].

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The New JournaUFebruary 3, 1984 17

The land Down Under Rich Blow

"You want to know about the steam tunnels, is that it? Then I guess you want to know about the monster."

The monster?

"The steam tunnel monster . Oh, it's never been proven or anything, but Pve h eard the legends: stories of students d isappearing, workers in the tunnels terrified by str ange u nexplained noises.

M e? All I've ever seen down there is a ca t, b u t who knows? There could be anything in the tunnels."

T om Barone should know the steam tunnels as well as anyone. After all, he has worked in them for almost a quarter century. But the steam tunnels at Yale are far older than that, older even than the residential colleges.

L ik e the veins and a rteries of the human body, the tunnels carry essential n u trients to all the buildings on the Yale campus. Originating at Physical Plant, the command center of Yale utilities, th ese underground, concrete-lined passageways travel like a rodent's burrow under the Yale campus. Sheltering the p ipes which carry heat, water and electricity to the University community, the ten miles of tunnel are essential to Yale's existence.

Each one has its own special purpose.

O ne tu nnel keeps the water flowing in the rowing tanks at Payne Whitney gymnasium; another is responsible for shedd ing light on culture at the Yale Cen ter for British Art; 13 different tunnels provide essential utilities to the 12 colleges and the Old Campus. In some spots the passages are so narrow that only a child could crawl through them, while in other places workers use forklifts to get around.

Yet pipes are not all that travels through this underground network. For some. students, the mystique of the steam tu n n els has always had an irresistable allure. One senior in Ezra Stiles swea'rs there was once a gorilla in Design by tony Reese

the steam tunnels, perhaps adding to the legend of the tunnel monster. The former master of Pierson, Joh n H ersey, remembers one student who lived for three years in a small room adjacent to a tunnel to avoid the cost of room and board. .

But the tunnels also su pport a substantial sub-culture of amateur explorers. A group of these people came together in the early 1970s to form the Berkeley Tunneling T eam, an organization committed to th e penetration of Yale's subterranean lifelin es. The organization died after its founders

known to me as a fact. But Mole, who has been tunneling for years, knew the truth behind the rumors I had heard.

After some convincing, he not only confirmed SCESTY's existence, he also agreed to act as my guide for a descent into the steam tunnels.

Even with Mole's help, it wasn't easy to break into Yale's subterranean world.

We st arted our quest in the early morning hours of a frigid December night, armed only with two dying flashlights.

Our fi rst destination was a small grate

For some students, the m ystique of the steam tunnels h as always had an irresistible allure.

graduated, but now, there is another buried in a wall of Ber keley College. society going underground in New One good tug took care of the grate; unH aven. fortunately, before we'd gotten very far Numbering about 20 students, this ¡ we came across a locked door where new group calls itself the Society for th e there had been none before. Mole was Clandestine Exploration of Steam T un- . embarrassed by the delay; most locked nels at Yale (SCESTY). The members doors at Yale are easily p icked, especialof SCESTY are not amateurs. T hey ly for a tunneler. A thin piece of plastic maintain a strict hierarchy among that Mole had forgotten to bring would themselves, taking into consideration have quickly opened the door. seniority and tunneling expertise. Their Our next attempt was a padlocked goal is to explore every inch of the tungrate outside of Commons. Through nels, and to find out as much informath e grate we could see the descending tion about Yale as they can in the prorungs of a ladder, but our flashlights cess. And, because their activity is could not penetrate the inky blackness highly illegal, SCESTY has an almost at the bottom. Much to Mole's chagrin, imp enetrable air of secrecy and however , the padlock also thwarted us. anonymity around it. F or these "I wish I'd come better prepared," he underground daredevils, exposure is sighed. "'f fd brought a hacksaw, we dangerous, and not surprisingly, the could simply have sawed off this lock group has thus far escaped the and replaced it with a ne~ one- for awareness o f all but a tiny few at Yale. which I have the only key. Usually Before I met Mole, none of this was when I tunnel I come down with teams T h e New J ournal/February 3, 1984 19

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22 The N cw .J ou rna I/ February 3, 1984

of three or four people: an expert at Jockpicking, an expert at bypassing alarms, and so on. It's really very easy to get in that way."

On our third try, luck was on our side. A manhole cover in Branford College lifted smoothly out of the ground. I climbed down a ladder leading into darkness below. Brick pressed against my back and made me wish I was just a little bit thinner. About 15 feet below the ground I felt concrete beneath me; above me, Mole was sliding the manhole cover back into place, blocking out the stars.

I shined my flashlight around me.

We were in a long, narrow, concrete corridor; the ceiling was uncomfortably low, and I had to stoop to avoid bitting my head. On one side of me were the steam pipes, hanging suspended from the ceiling and running farther than I could see. Steam hissed from small leaks in the pipes, and we could hear disembodied voices drifting down to us from the world above. The steam made breathing d ifficult; the pipes heat the tunnels to a minimum of about 110 degrees, and I was dressed for the chill of a New England winter.

With our flashlights swinging from side to side but not helping very much, we slowly made our way through the tunnel, taking care not to touch the scalding-hot pipes. We passed underneath York Street, though there was no sound of the traffic above. At the entrance to Davenport College, we found our w<J,Y. blocked by another locked door.

• "I could pick it," Mole said, "but I think I'll pass on this one. Take a look above the door." He pointed to a small red wire that I hadn't noticed before: an alarm, designed specifcally to keep people like us out of the tunnels.

We went another route, tunneling underneath Saybrook College and Elrn Street, quite possibly the safest way to get to the other side of that speedway.

Across the street was another door.

Unlike the last, however, this one had no little red wire. "I'm going to open this," said Mole, "but there could be an alarm on the other side. If there is, just

get out of here as fast as you can. It doesn't take long for Yale police to get down here."

Mole opened the door, looked up, and started to run. I deduced that there was an alarm after all, and followed in Mole's disappearing footsteps. Images burst through my mind of sirens blaring out through Physical Plant, of policemen grabbing rifles and tear gas and heading into the tunnels, of me being escorted out Phelps Gate with my luggage strapped to my back.

Fortunately, none of these nightmares happened. In what seemed like seconds we were climbing up the ladder and into the cold air; the only person we saw was a lone woman too shocked by two men crawling out of a hole in the ground at three in the morning to do anything about it.

The next night, Mole and I headed out again. This time the Law School would be our victim. Though it was again long past midnight, it seemed as if all the students there were awake and sitting stiffly at desks next to their windows. Mole and I felt conspicuously out of place, but none of the students we saw even looked up from their books.

Mole had tunneled underneath the La~ School before, so we quickly found an entrance, a small opening in the basement. We dropped through, though there was only blackness below, and found ourselves in a large room, almost like a cave. A low hum vibrated through the dark, and we traced it to a bank of power switches against the wall. ~ wouldn't touch that," Mole said.

"You'd almost certainly wind up dead."

We decided to move on.

We passed out of that room, into another long, hot, and badly-lit corridor. In the wan beam of my flashlight , I spotted an old cover of Time magazine. Ronald Reagan's familiar visage beamed out at me from underneath almost a decade of dust. The caption below read "Reagan Heats Up The GOP." November 24, 1975.

Shining ahead, our lights reflected off a row of black objects in a small,

screened-off area. On closer inspection, they proved to be water drums, some 200 of them. On the sides was the intimidating label, "Office of Civil Defense- Emergency Shelter Supplies." Here, ironically, tucked away underneath the room where Wolfgang Leonhard lectured o n the Soviet Union, was a bomb shelter. These barrels meant a chance at life for sur\ ivors of a nuclear war.

Just ahead, we saw more cold war time capsules -loose bottles of various medicines, still sealed and probably still usable. The medicines were surprisingly familiar: aspirin, iodine, baking soda, laxatives. It all seemed too mundane for radiation poisoning. Mole handed me a small pamphlet, crumbling and almost illegible. Dated Jul), 1962, the cover read "Fallout Shelter Medical Kit- Family Guide to Emergency Health Care." Inside were the instructions on the use of the various medicines we'd found , "to prevent and control emotional problems among shelter occupants." I wondered how

much that aspirin and baking soda had done to make 1962 America more secure. But the shelter was more intriguing than depressing, like finding a secret buried in someone's past.

Satisfied with our unusual find, Mole and I left the tunnel and ended that night's explorations, though not before I'd pocketed the pamphlet as a reminder.

For all its appeal, tunneling is not without its drawbacks, being both dangerous and illegal. Workers and student explorers alike consider the tunnels so risky that they will not enter the network without at least one companion.

One danger is the temperature, which in some parts of the tunnels can reach 150 degrees, making maintenance and exploration almost impossible. As Tom Barone said, "If you're dm'V11 there alone and you faint, or hit your head and get knocked out ... well, no one will ever find you . God forbid if something ever happened."

The New Journal/February 3, 1984 23

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A lone explorer could easily get lost or trapped in the tunnels. One "Student, caught in the tunnels after his way in had been blocked off, only escaped by squeezing past the whirling steel blades of a six-foot fan.

But by far the greatest danger in the steam tunnels comes from the threat of a pipe explosion. Heated to some 400 degrees, under tremendous pressure, the steam could easily kill. In addition, the pipes in the tunnels are over half a century old, and their consequent deterioration makes the possibility of a pipe rupture ever greater with the passage of time. Bob Sherman, Director of Energy Management and Utilities, has in his office the remains of an exploded pipe; made of one quarter inch steel, the pipe was ripped wide open, as if by a giant can opener. "There was a man present when this happened," Sherman said.

"He was lucky; he got out. Usually if the steam doesn't burn you to death it'll suffocate you almost immediately."

If the tunnels are this dangerous, why

do Mole and others like him frequently risk injury to explore them? Ap associate of Mole's and a member of SCESTY said," "We just love to explore. When you're · tunneling, you're maybe ten feet away from civilization, but it seems like a lot more. The risk of ~ting hurt is acceptable; the risk of getting caught is a pain. Obviously, we don't want to get hurt ... but if we did, we sure wouldn't tell anyone how it happened." Several years ago, in fact, one tunneler burned himself on a steam pipe badly enought to warrant a trip to DUH. Once there, however, the tunneler refused to reveal ju~t how his arm had been so badly burned, much to the irritation of his doctor.

Though romantics might think that the risk of getting caught would add to the excitement of exploration, most tunnelers disagree. Mole takes particular care to avoid Yale police. "It's my paranoia," he explained, "that keeps me from getting caught. I n the tunnels, fm always listening . . . for footsteps, loose

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change, dangling keys, a policem an's radio . . . always listening."

After my tour of the L aw School, I decided that it might be interesting to go underground in an above-board way. And so I arranged with Bob Sherman to go on a tour o f the Physical Plant that would be decidedly m ore legal than what I'd been doing. Sherman seemed a bit surprised that a n yone could be so curious, but he agreed to allow me down into the tunnels.

When I arrived at Physical Plant, one quick stop had to be m ad e at a place that I'd already come a cross, u nder somewhat different circumstances: the alarm center. Before we could actually descend into the tunnels , Sherm an had to notify a guard of our presence so we could avoid tripping any of the h u ndreds of alarm wires crawling throughout the tunnel system.

Before 1977 there were no ruaru1S. But in that year Local 35, Yale's bluecollar union, went o n a prolo nged strike, and tensions between the University and the unio n grew highso high, in fact , that the re were rumors of possible sabotage a gainst the vital maintenance systems sheltered b y the tunnels · by striking union member s or their supporters. Though Sherm an said that nothing ever happened during the course of that strike, the alarms were never shut off and are now used to keep students out of the tunnels.

Sherman led me into a small, q uiet room where a uniformed man sat in front of a desk. Above him loom ed a large electronic display screen brightly showing the tunnel network. Red ligh ts, which flash when security has been breached, marked the en trances to the tunnels. The guard looked at us rather suspiciously, and o nly grudgingly accepted Sherman's explana tion o f our trip.

Sherman and I wen t down a creaky metal staircase into the basemen t of the plant, the very center of the spider's web of tunnels. This enormous room bear s a resemblance to Dante's Infern o.

Machines pound at a .deafening level, making it impossible to talk without

shou ting. Steam seems to jet from nowhere, for no reason <~.nd with no warning. Murky lighting and twisting, hanging pipes force you to stay alert.

The heat was nearly as intolerable as it was within the tunnels.

Sherman draped his jacket over a pipe and led the way to a solid steel door e m bedded in one wall. H e took a bunch of keys from his pocket and ch uckled.

"Well, you wanted to see a tu nnel, so here you go." The door opened quickly with a key. This was certainly easier than pulling grates out of walls, sawing through padlocks and jumping through basement windows.

I followed Sherman in to the tunnel, which I'd seen prominently displayed on the alarm screen upstairs. One of the longest of the underground p ath ways, the tunnel runs all the way to T imothy D wigh t in one direction, and the Yale Center for Br itish Art in another. O nce inside this core, an experienced tunneler could make his way virtually anywhere underneath Yale. As we walked slowly down the tunnel , Sherman explained the difficulties of tunnel maintenance. The heat, he said, made it almost impossible to work in the tunnel for more than an hou r at a time, and workers have to take frequent breaks.

Maintenance is slow, painstaking and prohibitively expensive.

After about a hundred yards we came to a fork in the tunnel. Beyond, ·pipes str etched out farther than I could see.

Overhead, we could feel cars speeding d own Tower P arkway. From this point on, the tunnel was sprinkled with turns, extensions, intersections and the like.

"We have to turn back here," Sherman said. Reluctantly, I agreed, though my m ind was straining at the leash of his authority. Still, as we walked back to the entrance, I glanced over my shoulder for one last look. I couldn't help but think of Mole, and of what he would do wiili ilie heavy keychain which dangled loosely from Sherman's outstretched hand.

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The New J ournaVFebruary 3, 1984 25

The Making of a Poet Katherine Scobey Four years ago the initials "H .D ." were unknown by just about everyone. Some scholars of English literature recognized them as the signature of Hilda Doolittle, one of the earliest imagists. What they had read, they had forgotten .

But in the past three years, H .D., who died in 1961 , has begun to achieve a fame which one far-sighted American Studies professor at Yale believed she deserved all along. As early as 1936, Nonnan Holmes Pearson was preparing the ground and planting the seeds for the sudden flowering of H .D. H e collected her writings from a half century into an archive now belonging to the Beinecke Library, and was responsible for recognizing and publishing BOrne of her most important work. Yet Pearson, who died nine years ago, never saw the sudden rise in H.D.'s popularity that is largely the result of his efForts.

Pearson's friend and colleague at Yale, Louis Martz, Sterling Professor of English, took up where Pearson left ofT. In November of 1983 New Directions Publishing Corporation published H. D. Coli«ud Poems 1912-1944, edited and with an introduction by Martz. It is a landmark volume which for the fU"St time makes her work available to the public as a coherent body. In addition to numerous volumes of poetry which have been out of print for up to 44 years, CollecteJ Poems includes some 200 pages of poems never before published or published only once in obscure journals.

What is making even more of a splash than Martz's volume; however, ia a biography of H .D . published last month, Herself Defined, by Barbara Guest. Before the book was· available in ltores, it had already been reviewed in Vo,w, ·nu New York Times, and Time.

Guest's is the third biography of H.D. to appear in the past three years. And

three more critical volumes are underway.

Pearson tried but was never able to put H .D. in the limelight she enjoys now posthumously. More than anything else, the feminist movement is responsible for her current renaissance.

H.D. is an important figure in poetry because "the women academics have talked about her as being a major figure," said Peter Glassgold, editor of H.D. material at New Directions. "She

Left, H.D., Norman Holmes P earson and Bryher in front of Sterling Memorial Library

was the undiscovered major woman poet" the feminist critics were looking for. H.D. is a voice of the eighties, even though she wrote during the tens, twenties, thirties, forties and ftfties . Her poetry and novels can be read as a feminist manifesto- one female artist's seeking and fmding herself and her work.

The feminist reading, however, as only one which may be applied to

H.D.'s wr1tmg. Feminism may have brought H.D.'s work to scrutiny, but a value beyond its apparent sympathy with a social movement is what must, and probably will, establish it among the classics.

But who was H.D.? Her fans are familiar with the delightful storybook beginning of her career as a poet. As the account goes, Hilda, 26, had been away from her strict Moravian home in Upper Darby, a suburb of Philadelphia, about a year. She was living in London as a protegee of her fonner fiance, Ezra Pound, the irreverent expatriate from Hailey, Idaho, whose red hair stood straight up from his forehead and whose notions of poetry had been stirring up literati on the Continent and in England for several years. She had met him at age 15 when he was a student at the University of Pennsylvania. He left behind "Gawel's own, god-damn country," and a smitten Hilda followed, although the marriage never came ofT. Hilda had left Bryn Mawr midway through her sophomore year, having flunked English and barely passed other courses, owing, Barbara Guest suggests, to Pound's unorthodox and uncompromising ideas of what her curriculum ought to comprise. Now, in London, she tried her hand at poetry, and Pound, the self-established critic and promoter of modern poetry, pronounced it good. In a cafe near the British Museum, the two let their tea grow cold as Pound read Hilda's "Hennes of the Ways," signed it with a flourish "H.D. Imagiste," and sent it off to Harriet Monroe at Poetry magazine in Chicago.

Using the initials "H.D." was a brilliant tactic. They wen: eye-catching, and they represented perfectly the main principle of the new movement, imagism- a paring down of the prosaic, excessive vene of the end of the 19th cen-

The New JoumaVFebruary 3, 1984 27

"Pearson decided he was going to make H.D. wellknown. H e felt, quite rightly, that here was a neglected poet, an immortal," said Martz.

Left, death mask of Hilda Doolittle Below, Louis Martz

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tury to bare essentials, to a single 'image', an "intellectual and emotional com· plex in an instant of time," as Pound himself defined it. In a letter he characterized it as "objectivity-no sli.ther; direct- no excessive use of ad· jectives . . . It's straight talk."

The imagists talked hour after hour in the tea shops of Kensington, which had become the imagist quarter of Lon· don. H.D., as Pound's pet disciple, was the favored imagist. Pound had in· troduced her to the Greek Anthology, and she was u sing the Greek forms for her images- figures of the gods from the Greek pantheon as masks through which to speak, images of Hellenic marble sculpture, bronze statuary, the hard, athletic Greek bodies, and the Olympian spirit of contest. H .D ., with her svelte five feet 11 inches and her ex· otic dress, might have been one of her own figures . She always drew a host of admirers, yet always she maintained an aloofness. She played the role of a Greek goddess who would engage in play and contest with mortals, but who was ultimately apart.

It was 1912 when Pound, H .D . and Richard Aldington (whom H .D. mar· ried a year later) initiated imagism, and th• -novement grew in influence and at· trac..ed converts immediately. Within two years the sublime activity of poetry· wnting and tea-drinking came crashing to earth as the result of two things. In •}914 World War I broke out, and some poets, like Aldington, went to the front; others were left in.a city plagued by war and hunger. Second, imagism faltered as Pound, the master of ceremonies and promoter of the group with publishers, left it to found another movement. The bright lights of imagism faded , and while imagists certainly continued to write and publish, they had lost the glamour of the moment.

Such was H.D.'s beginning. She con· tinued to write until her death, yet she never enjoyed a similar eminence. This was mainly because there was no Pound at her side, explaining and promoting her work among publishers. H .D . her· self was not the dramatic salesman that Pound was. She published in various

,.

important journals- Poetry in the United States, The Egoist and Ford Maddox Ford's English Review in England, Transition in Paris and others.

But not until 1925, 12 years after the first H.D. poetry was published in a magazine, did she collect a volume of her very considerable corpus. She appeared in several anthologies of modern poetry, but mainly H.D. pursued her own publication erratically, continually withholding and revising poems.

Ultimately H.D. found another promoter-or rather he found her. It was Norman Holmes Pearson, a young professor at Yale who was then collecting information for The Oxford Anthology of A71'1lri&an LiJerature. They first met in 1936 in New York City on one of H.D.'s rare trips back to the United States, and the meeting proved to be the start of a relationship that would shape the second half of her career. "I remember his talking about her from then on," said Louis Martz, then a close associate of Pearson at Yale. H.D. was so pleased to be included in the Oxford anthology, Martz remembers, because "it was her first appearance with the classics of American literature- Stevens, Whitman . . ."

Evidently, Pearson was equally pleased with H.D. When he lived in London as an intelligence officer in the Second World War, working on a counter-espionage mission, he saw H.D. frequently. "H .D. trusted him and loved him," said Martz, and Pearson encouraged her to send him her work which he would preserve on a "shelf' at Yale. Pearson had become H.D.'s friend and literary representative; she had granted him power of attorney before the war to copyright her work and later made him her literary executor. Pearson's persistent effort is behind most of H.D.'s work published after the war, starting with &/ected Poems in 1957.

Encouraging H.D. to collect her writing was Pearson's greatest service to H.D. Anyone acquainted with modern poetry knew H.D., but only as the writer of a few imagist poems which had appeared in anthologies. After 1931 the

CourtMY Col!ÂŤtlon of AmÂŤ<can Utwature

"She played the role of a Greek goddess who would engage in play and contest with mortals, but who was ultimately apart."

The New Journal/February 3, 1984 29

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literary world supposed H.D. was silent, but in fact she was writing prolifically. Pearson urged H.D. to collect the vast work, and in 1948 she had her old manuscripts retyped and sent to Pearson at Yale. "Pearson decided he was going to make her well-known," said Martz. "He would do it for poetry and for her. He felt-quite rightlythat here was a neglected poet, an immortal."

In 1957 Selected Poems appeared, resurrecting the imagist poems which readers had forgotten and introducing new poems which stretched beyond imagism. Pearson gave Martz ~ copy of the volume one day at lunch. By this time it was evident that Pearson saw h is role as a-salesman as well as a scholar.

Inside the cover was Pearson's inscription: "from the entrepreneu r of H.D.'s Srlected Poems. " Martz began teaching H .D .'s poetry after the Second World War. "I taught what I could get ofher," said Martz. "The trouble was she just wasn't available."

At that time hardly anybody in the country was teaching H.D. Martz first was forced to use mimeographed copies or anthologies, but Pearson's volume changed all that in 1957. Throughout the sixties and the seventies until his death Pearson continued bringing out volumes. Meanwhile, the collection on the "shelf' grew to fill bookcases in Pearson's office and in the library. Martz callsPearsonthe "one-man promoter" of H.D. Ten years ago Martz began teaching a modern poetry lecture course and. thanks to Pearson's effort, was able to make H.D. a significant part of the course. "I thought she should be given her place with Pound, Williams and Lawrence, her contemporaries," he said. He did have doubts, though. "At first I wasn't sure she'd hold up in that company- but the student response was very strong, and I was encouraged to expand.'' Now Martz feels certain that H .D. "is worthy of consideration in the same breath as Pound and Williams. I don't know if I or Norman Pearson would say that her achievement IS equal to that of Pound or

Williams. But it is a very great achievement."

Martz is, however , confident enough of H.D .'s wartime Tn'logy to compare it to T.S. Eliot's Four Quartets, both poems being the products of poets who "came alive under the impact of war." Martz foresees that this "big piece, like Pound's Cantos or Williams' Paterson, will pull H.D. into the mainstream undoubtedly, if it hasn't already."

These distinctions aside, H.D. has reached a status in the literary marketplace that puts her in the company of the most celebrated 20th century writers. "There has been a great . deal of pressure to publish everything we could by H.D. in the past five years," said Glassgold at New Directions. Sales of Trilogy, a paperback edition of what is considered H.D.'s best poetic work, rose from 200 to 1200 in 1983. Facing such demand, New Directions published three novels and will reissue another this spring. "We have no intention of letting anything of H.D.'s out of print," Glassgold said.

New Directions does not expect the Collected Poems to sell dramatically, largely because, as Martz explained, the poetry is "too new; it hasn't entered into the public consciousness- but it will. The poetry takes a lot of reading and rereading." Martz himself, who has probably spent more time reading H .D. critically than any scholar in the world today, admits he does not understand all of H.D.'s work. Of Helen In Egypt, a late work, he said, "I just don't respond to it, but rm reserving judgment.p Martz believes that readers are increasingly willing to devote the effort her work requires. "People are willing to do that for T.S. Eliot and Pound and Williams, and they will be willing to do 'that for H.D. too. More and more, people will read the whole body of her work."

The Collected Poems figures, of course, largely into that. Martz's introduction provides a superb review of H.D.'s life and her poetry, illuminating the poetry which is, at times, highly allusive and thus difficult for the uninitiate. S imilarly, the recent H.D. biographies prove

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very helpful towards understanding her work. But a strict autobiographical reading can only go so far. "I don't really like to read the poems that way," Martz said. "The biographical aspect is not central to the poem, only the origin of_ it, and one hates to press its significance."

Nonetheless, anyone familiar with H .D.'s work must recognize that her own life was the dominant subject of her writing. Her novels and poetry tell the story of a life of disappointments which shook a frail psyche. She had left Pennsylvania and her mother's Moravian values and codes for life among the European avant-garde. This change setoff in H.D. a struggle which lasted her entire life, and which was exacerbated when she divorced her husband and turned to bisexuality. "She was breaking everything her mother ever told her," Martz said. H.D. couldn't quite be a "modern woman," and yet she wanted even more than that. "In her whole career, she desired the autonomy, the independence of a great artist, the artist who lives for work and in work. I don't suppose any artist ever found that," Martz said. Nevertheless, H.D. was "thinking of herself as Artemis, above the physical world.

Greece was her ideal of a perfect world of art. But H.D. knew she could not be Artemis, and her relationships were always disappointing to her because they didn't measure up to her ideal." â&#x20AC;˘.Pound was the first to fail her, forsaking her as her fiancee and forsaking the imagism movement. Then her husband's numerous, blatant infidelities dealt a second blow. In 1915 H.D. miscarried a child and was advised not to have any more children, at least until the end of the war. This meant sexual abstinence, something which Aldington resented and, somehow, interpreted as frigidity in H.D. In a poem H.D. writes about that time, she claims the case was otherwise: I was not dull and dead whm I jell back on our couch. at night.

I was not indifferent though. I turned

and lay quid.

I was not de4d in my sleep.

RICHTER'S

H.D. bitterly resented Aldington's infidelity, and was deeply hurt by it, as she reveals later in the poem: lww I hate you for this, lww I despise and hate, was my beauty so slight a gift, so soon, so soon forgot?

Finally there was D.H. Lawrence, whom H.D. loved, but who would not consummate any physical relation with her. This rejection, coming on the heels of Pound's and Aldington's, threatened to overcome H.D. A woman named Winifred Ellerman saved her from illness and despair.

Ellerman, who took the pen name Bryher, was the illegitimate daughter of one of Britain's wealthiest men. Bryher first approached H .D . as a fan in 1918.

The young woman had committed to memory all of H.D.'s first volume of poetry-some 27 poems. This infatuation developed into a lesbian relationship lasting throughout their lives. The 400-page Bryher-H.D. correspondence now belongs to the Beinecke, and since Bryher's death two years ago, is open to research .

The trauma of male rejection and guilt for her lesbian impulses became themes throughout H.D.'s poetry. Initially the tension inspired gripping poetry, but ultimately it overcame her, and the quality of her writing broke down.

In 1933 H.D. went to Vienna for treatment with Sigmund Freud, who was then ministering to the troubled psyches of the European avant-garde.

Her analysis lasted less than a year, but obviously had a profound impact upon her. Freud showed her "she was not a bad woman: Martz explainee, and this freed her to write once again . H .D . acknowledges her debt in a poem to Freud, "The Master":

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She also wrote Tribute to Freud, a prose ~u nt of her analysis which New Du-ections will reissue in paperback this spring.

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new perception of herself. She focused upon the perfection of the female artist, establishing independence from the male. In two poems this artist is represented by a dancer: there is a rose flower parted wide, as her limbs fling wide in dance ecstatic Aphrodiu, there is a frail kwnui.er flownhidden in grass;

0 God whaJ is it, this flower that in itselfhad power over tlu whole earth? for she needs no man, herself is that dart and pulse of the male, hands, feet, thighs, herself perfect.

The perfection of the female artist was H.D.'s ideal. Neither her life nor her poetry was perfect, but for H .D ., to assert and to celebrate a power all her own was the essence of art:

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At least I have the flowers of myself and my thoughts, no god can taJce that; I have the fervour of myselffor a presence and my own spin't for ligiU; and my spin't with its loss knows this; though smol1 against the black, smol1 against the formless rocks, hell must lmoJc lxfore I am lost; lxjore I am lost, heU must open liu a red rose for the deod to pass.

Far from being lost, H.D. is approaching eminence commensurate to that of her male contemporaries. Said Martz: •1 wouldn't be at all surprised if 10 years from now people were saying, 'H.D.'s the one, not Pound.'•

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Yale Political Scientist Paul Bracken

Taming the Nuclear Leviathan Bracken's analysis may render moot much of what has been written on the subject of nuclear war.

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by Paul Bracken, 1983 Yale University Press. $19.95. 252 pp.

illuminates the potentially catastrophic organizational weaknesses and physical frailties of the command structures which control our nuclear arsenal. The Nuclear theorists are not a reassuring danger facing the world today, says lot. They are invariably haunted by Bracken, who was formerly associated two memories imprinted in modern with the Hudson Institute, is that the history, memories which evoke a terror superpowers have institutionalized a surpassed only by their visions of major nuclear showdown. They have future devastation: Munich in 1939 and "built the most complex technological Hitler's subsequent march through apparatus ever conceived without thinkEurope; and Sarajevo in 1914 and its ing through its purpose or how to control it." escalation into a pointless world war.

Yale political scientist Paul Bracken There was once a time when both is haunted by the latter. He draws a superpowers regarded nuclear weapparallel between the "fantastically com- ons as so uniquely destructive that plex" nuclear command systems which neither entrusted the military with have evolved in the United States and their control. But because of the inthe Soviet Union and the interlocking creasing complexity of nuclear stratealerts and mobilizations that swamped gies, the control of nuclear forces has the political process in 1914. The shifted from the political leaders to the modern day leviathan, however, has men in uniform. In theory, only the been built on a far more spectacular president has the authority to launch a nuclear war. In reality, authority has scale than its earlier counterpart.

The Command and Control of Nuclear been pre-delegated to the military in the Forces is an important and readable event that the president .is killed within book which, according to Eugene the first few minutes of a nuclear war.

Bracken believes that we are, in all Rostow, may provide a new way of looking at nuclear arms issues for a likelihood, less secure today than we generation of young scholars. Bracken were 20 years ago. Both the Soviet The New Journal/February 3, 1984 35

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Union and the United States have constructed warning systems so complex and high-strung that a series of relatively minor events could be amplified and lead to an extremely dangerous escalatiol'l of tension.

I n peacetime this system of massively redundant checks and balances makes remote the likelihood of an accidental nuclear war provoked by an isolated event. A faulty computer chip or a Oock of geese which resembles a fleet of bombers will not trigger Armageddon today.

In time of crisis, however, our warning system takes on an erhircly new dimension. When forces are placed on alert, the system that ~as intended to provide redundant checks on isolated errors may, in fact, amplify those errors. Under enormous time pressures human operators may misinterpret random unrelated events and fearing the worst, set in motion a chain reaction of reinforcing higher alerts; this danger would be particularly acute in a European war.

During the Hungarian uprising and the British and French attack on the Suez in 1956, U.S. military command received reports that unidentified jet aircraft were flying over Turkey, that Soviet MIGs were flying over Syria, that a British bomber had been shot down over Syria and that a Russian fleet was moving though the Dardanelles. The "jets" o~cr Turkey turned out to be a flock ofs\.,ans; the MIGs, a routine escort. The British bomber was downed by mechanical difficulties, and the Soviet fleet was engaged in longscheduled exercises.

Catastrophe was averted in 1956.

Indeed , we have skirted the nuclear abyss for 39 years. But the command and control system of today is more highly sensitized than ever before And with the presence of Sovi<•t submannes ofT the Atlantic coast who-.(' missiles could rea<.:h \'\'ashingwn m less than ten minutes and the deployment of Pershing II mi1.siles in Europe, the commanders must ht' pn·pan:o to make split-second cletisions.

At any mome nt, warns Bracken, these forces can b e put on alert, and decades of sleepy, u nexamined confidence would d isappear. The fact th at nuclear war hasn't h appen ed a fter so many years has lulled some people into confidently projecting peace into the indefinite futu re. But Bracken is quick to note that a similar feeling o f security dominated popular and elite opinion in the decade p receding Wo rld War I. People were cau ght b y su rprise when the peqce was shattered in Sarajevo because th e common wisd o m was that no one would be so irrational as to initiate a major war. Bracken wan ts to make sure we remember th at lesson.

Bracken's book has been hailed by hawks and doves alike. According to McGeorge Bu ndy, former advisor to Kennedy and John son, there is nothing superior in the declassified literature to Bracken's analysis o f command and control. Former R eagan advisor Eugene R ostow h as described the book as "brilliant and sophisticated" and "a powerful and constructive exercise in rationality which fully con firms the good sense of the taboo against the actual use of nuclear weapons."

S imilarly, P aul W arnke, President Carter's chief arms n egotiator, believes that Bracken's work "d emolished the myth that nuclear weapons can solve all our defense proble m s if o nly we ls:arn how to build th em right and to use them flex ibly., Bracken offers a new focus to the study of n u clear war. H is book is a rebuff to those whose analysis of the nuclear predicament is dominated by warhead counts. It is also a rebuff to those strategists wh o, in their pursuit of greater sophistication and "hard h~ad~ realism," have constructed scenanos rn which a limited nu clear war could be fought. These scenarios presuppose ra· tional decision - m aking, political bargaining during a n u clear exchange, and a per fect fl ow of in form ation, each of which would be absen t o r impossible during the chaos of con frontatio n . I n~ nuclear war , command and commum· cation structures would be shattered,

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"The only thing worse than an uncontrollable force is a political leadership that mistakenly believes it has a controllable force." and surviving political and military leaders would be unable to control any conflict.

"The only thing worse than an uncontrollable force," writes Bracken, "is a political leadership that mistakenly believes it has a controllable force."

For the past several months a great deal of thought and anguish has been directed at the question of the survivability of our land-based missiles.

Bracken makes clear, however, that regardless of whether one deploys MX missiles on a race track, in a dense pack or at sea, they will still be vulnerable as long as the systems which control them are vulnerable.

The sheer size and survivability of American and Soviet nuclear forces have driven each side to search for weak links in the system. Command and control represents such a link.

American forces could weather a first strike. But the command centers in Washington and elsewhere could not.

It would require only a fraction of the Soviet arsenal- about 100 warheads to "decapitate" America's nuclear forces by destroying the authority needed to use and control them. A few warheads targeted at critical points along our commercial telephone lines could isolate and effectively paralyze ?ur command system. Thus a strategy tn which our centers are targeted for destruction by the Soviets offers their best hope of escaping retaliation. . Yet because of the secrecy surroun~mg the flow of authority and the contmgency plans of our command structure, the Soviet Union cannot yet launch an attack with the certainty of paralyzing our forces. Such an attack might instead set off a pre-arranged ch~in reaction of firing authorizations ~h1ch would, in turn, trigger a masSive retaliation. This uncertainty, according to Bracken, serves as a m ajor deterrent to Soviet attack.

The problem of cascading chain reactions is especially acute in Europe, perhaps the most likely battleground for a nuclear war. In Europe time would be compressed and distinctions blurred in the event of the outbreak of war. Bracken. believes that the line which separates a conventional from a tactical nuclear war would be difficull to discern. The distinction between a local tactical and an inter-continental strategic war would be even less clear.

During an alert in Europe nearly 6,000 warheads n ormally kept in storage and under "lock" would be dispersed from the North Sea to the plateaus of eastern Turkey. These weapons would fall under the sole control of the military commanders of eight different NATO nations. Too m any decisions would have to be made by too many people in a matter of seconds. During a state of full alert a single European pilot could trigger World War III. Rather than constructing a means and strategy of defending against an attack once it occurs, Europe has, by choice, attempted to construct a "regional Doomsday machine" so unstable and uncontrollable that ·the Soviets would never dare step onto Western European soil for fear of automatically triggering an all-out nuclear war.

D eterrence, therefore, rests not upon any elegant theory of escalationcontrol and bargaining nor upon the careful quantitative comparison of nuclear forces, but upon a fear of the unknowable and uncontrollable, upon a fear that any major provocation- or perception of provocation- might launch a series of events beyond the control of the political leaders or the military officers themselves.

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• Mike Otsuka, a sophomore m Trumbull, is an AssociaU Editor of TN].

21 BROADWAY

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Afterthought/David Frum Out of the Blue Ten Simple Suggestions on How to be an Alumnus No matter how many classes you skip, no matter how many term papers you mangle, no matter- well, almost no matter- how many courses you fail, Yale is going to make an alumnus of you. And once you are an alumnus, you will realize that your undergraduate days were but the larval stage of your Yale ca~eer, the period in which Yale prepared you to become a prominent bread-winner for higher education. It is a difficult ·and exp~nsive proposition to. be a Yale alumnus, and one for which you are going to get very li.ttle formal training. I can't pretend to any great expertise or experience at this business; still, after 18 months of assiduous reading of the Yale Alumni Magazine, I think I can offer a few helpful suggestions for everybody who feels the imminence of Commencement.

1. Be rich. This is probably the most important qualification for the successful alumnus. Class dues, the Quarter Century Fund, and the Yale Alumni Fund are just the beginning of the contribution that Yale imagines you owe. And as the veal parmigiana in the dining hall and the agonies of Bursar's Hold become memories more and more distant, you are going to find it harder and harder to say "no." But the successful alumnus must be rich not only to gratify Yale's material needs; he should be rich to provide titillating reading for the Alumni Magazine's subscribers. From th~ December 1983 issue: "The tomato reigned supreme at the magnificent costume party that Drue Heinz gave to celebrate jack's 75th birthday at their beautiful English home in Ascot. Queen Elizabeth came.

And in New York City, at their Sutton Place residence, there was another superb celebration: mimes, mummers, jugglers, acrobats, tumblers, clowns, and a ketchup robot that passed out little Heinz pickle pins."

2. Be thick-skinned. On those few occasions when you come into contact with Yale, without being asked for money, you will be left in no doubt that you are regarded as a senile, football-crazed fool. Don't let this bother you!

3. Keep your mouth shut. It is something of a shock when you learn for the first time that people who did not go to Yale have not the slightest interest in that hilarious story about the night that you and your freshman roommates spent in the company of the New Haven police. For that 38 The New JournaVFebruary 3, 1984

matter, there probably aren't too many people who did go to Yale who want to hear it- your freshman roommates least of all.

4. Drop your nickname. Do you really want to go through life known as "Chip"?

5. Live into your nineties. If you survive long enough, some whipper-snapper with a tape recorder from the Yale Daily News will decide that the hilarious story about the night that you and your freshman roommate spent with the New Haven pollee is "oral history." Then you can tell it as often as you want.

6. Don't try to explain to your friends and relatives why a YakHarvard game matters.

7. Don't get sentimental.

When you think of Yale, remember- the weather; the Beth Calleghan/The New Journal lines at freshman commons; what Mory's green cups really taste like; the lines in the Co-op's book section; midterms; mononucleosis; dean's excuses; the muck on the floor of Yale Station; the Political Union; "Seafood Newburg"; your first hangover; the distinctive smell of garbage in your entry- the distinctive smell of your freshman roommate; all-nighters; library fines; the coffee at Yorkside; and the horrible moment when they handed you your diploma and you realized that you still had not found a job.

8. Don't write to the Magazine about your religious experience.

It is embarrassing•for everybody.

9. Resign yourself to the fact that Yale has been going downhill in every way since you graduated. Think of Evelyn Waugh's story about returning to Oxford in 1948: "A very polite, gentle young man got up at the end of the lecture and said, 'I should like to ask Mr. Waugh whether it is true, as we are always being told, that undergraduates today are much stupider, and less cultured, and amusing, than undergraduates were in his day.' And I had to say, Well, yes it is.' And he said very sadly, 'I thought so,' and sat down." · 10. Book your room now for the 25th reunion.

David Frum, '82, lives in Toronto. H e was a columnist for tke Yale Daily News for a year and a half

eNewJournal:

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We are as interested in learning from you as we are willing to teach you what we already know.

To learn more about The New Journal call Editor W. Hampton Side at 865-.1554 or Publisher Hilary Callahan 432-3219.

Or, attend ou organizational meeting on Monday, February 6th at 8 p.m. in the Berkeley Common Room

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