Tuesday March 6 2012 | Week 7
Body monitoring ‘smart pills’
S I N C E 1887
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T H E U K ' S O LD E S T S T U D EN T N EW S PA P ER
S cott ish S t udent Ne wspaper of the Year 2010
Starting gun fired on EUSA elections
Wi-fi for everyone!
City council set out to provide wireless internet in all Edinburgh outdoor public spaces>> News P3
Graduate unemployment rises to same level as school leavers Thurston Smalley UNEMPLOYMENT FIGURES released by the Office for National Statistics (ONS) earlier this month reveal that the rate of unemployment among 21 year-old university graduates is roughly equal to that of 18 year-old school leavers, at 25 per cent and 26 per cent, respectively. The ONS statistics paint a generally bleak picture of the obstacles faced by youth entering the workforce. Unemployment among those aged 16 to 24 reached 1.04 million, or 22.2 per cent, this month. However, the statistics, which also record unemployment at its highest level since 1987, do show that university graduates enter employment more
quickly than school leavers, with only five per cent of degree holders unemployed by age 24. By contrast, seven per cent of A-level and 13 per cent of GCSE school leavers remained unemployed by age 24. The Higher Education Careers Services Unit cautioned against attributing too much significance to the ONS figures on graduate employment as the number of those leaving school with A-levels was lower than the number of those graduating from university. The organisation’s deputy director of research, Charlie Ball, said, “Although the number of young people out of work is historically high, the graduate unemployment rate in this recession has not reached the levels it
did in the 1980s or 1990s.” He also insisted that despite the stagnant job market, most university graduates can still realistically expect to enter employment within six months. In addition, research published by investment firm Skandia projects that today’s university graduates can expect to earn £1.6 million over a 45 year career, while A-level leavers will earn £1 million over a 48 year career and GCSE leavers a mere £783,964 less than half of a university graduate’s expected earnings. Over recent months the coalition government has announced a series of measures designed to combat what Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has called the “ticking time bomb” of
high youth unemployment. Yet these schemes have faced heightened scrutiny in the wake of public criticism of the initiatives and allegations of fraud against the government-sponsored welfare-to-work firm A4e. Separate figures published by the ONS in November 2011 reveal Edinburgh is the third worst affected area in Scotland, with over 35 thousand residents claiming unemployment benefits. Second worst affected area is North Lanarkshire with just under 40 thousand claimants and worst affected is Glasgow with just under 90 thousand.
MARY-MONICA KAMEL
Sam Bradley
NOMINATIONS FOR the annual Edinburgh University Student’s Association elections have opened. The entry period for candidates who wish to run for any of the positions open during the general election ends on Thursday 15 March. Mike Williamson, the vice president of academic affairs at EUSA, told The Student why he thinks students might run for election, “People should stand for election because they should care about what is happening to higher education. “Locally there are lots of developments which need input from student representatives, from the new Personal Tutor system to curriculum design, but nationally there are all kinds of changes happening that could rip public education apart. “The movement needs people to fight against these changes, and getting involved in your students’ association is one of the most constructive ways to do that.” EUSA sabbatical officers have already posted videos on the organisation’s website detailing campaign techniques and reasons to run for election. Next week’s issue of The Student will contain a full list of the candidates running for election as well as a breakdown of the positions available. During the election, EUSA allocates all candidates an allowance of printing credit so that students running for election can produce publicity materials, but candidates are also allowed to use their own money to pay for publicity. All candidates are required to turn in receipts of publicity-related purchases to EUSA so that candidates are financially accountable. After the end of nominations, the sanctioned period for campaigning will begin. This includes the election debate on 26 March and ends on 29 March – election day. The results are due to be announced in a presentation ceremony that evening.
News: Nicola Sturgeon MSP speaks to the The Student about Scottish independence p3 A proposal with mileage p2
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Leap Day love on Royal Mile
What’s in this issue
»
NEWS »p1-4
WI-FI-FO-FUM p3
Free wifi just a fairy tale?
COMMENT »p7-9
WAVERING PUBLIC OPINION p 8
Lewis Macdonald spots a change in tack on social issues within the US, blowing the conservatives off course.
FEATURES »p10-11
FEAR AFTER DARK p10
Eloise Kohler shines a light on student safety at night.
UNFRIEND? p11
Harrison Kelly questions the politics of deleting Facebook friends.
SCIENCE &ENVIRONMENT » p12 GREAT SCOTT! p12
Alasdair Drennan explores the possibility of really owning a Tardis.
LIFESTYLE »p14
LET THEM EAT CAKE? p14
Catriona Sharp bakes up a batch of new sweet treats to surpass the cliché cupcake.
CULTURE »p18-19
DID SOMEONE BREAK WIND? p18
Maria Kheyfets reviews how Anna Barribill disorts traditional techniques at the Fruitmarket Gallery.
FILM »p20-21
ALL NIGHT LONG p20
Robert Dickie interviews Matt Palmer on why we love all night movie marathons.
SPORT »p27-28
THAT'S SO DOPE? p27
Sean Douglass argues that the overturning of Ryan Braun's baseball ban is a backwards step.
THE ROYAL Mile provided the backdrop for a Leap Day proposal last week. Genevieve Stockwell popped the question to her partner Rachad Nochahrli on the Royal Mile, taking advantage of the tradition encouraging women to propose to their partners on Leap Day. She enlisted the help of the Edinburgh University Brass Band and the Edinburgh-based male barbershop chorus Rolling Hills Chorus, who performed “Can’t Take My Eyes Off You”, before all revealing t-shirts spelling out “will you marry me?” Nochahrli accepted, to the delight of the watching, cheering crowd. The bride-to-be had been planning the proposal since last December, recruiting the Rolling Hills
Chorus via the internet and surprising her partner of three years with an unexpected trip to Scotland from their home in the United Arab Emirates. Nochahrli told The Scotsman, “We let our apartment in Dubai at 3am and I expected us to fly to Beirut with friends. "Instead, Genevieve handed me a boarding pass for Glasgow and after a quick train journey here we are now. It’s incredible.” Stockwell decided that Edinburgh would be the perfect setting in which to propose, saying, “I decided upon Edinburgh because it’s such a magical romantic city. It will always have a place in our hearts now.” The couple plan to hold their wedding in Stockwell’s native South Africa. In recent ScotPulse survey, Edinburgh was voted the second most
romantic place in the country for a marriage proposal, with the banks of Loch Lomond taking the stop spot. The Leap Day tradition of women proposing to their partners has rather contested beginnings. Legend has it that Queen Margaret of Scotland supposedly passed a law in 1288 permitting women to propose on 29 February but only as long as they wore a red petticoat so that potential suitors would be forewarned. In Ireland, the tradition is credited to Saint Brigid of Kildare, who allegedly asked Saint Patrick to allow women the right to propose to their intended. Initially, it is said, Saint Patrick granted women permission to do so once every seven years, altering this to once every four years at Saint Brigid’s insistence. Following this, Brigid proposed to him herself.
NUS President Robin Parker re-elected
Alasdair Drennan
CURRENT NUS president Robin Parker was re-elected at the annual conference of NUS Scotland, held in Irvine last weekend. Parker defeated Charandeep Singh, current president of Strathclyde University Students’ Union. On hearing of his victory, Parker tweeted that he was “willing and ready to serve students again for another year.” He also congratulated Singh on his “hard fought and positive” campaign. Delegates from universities and colleges across Scotland met to formulate the future policies of the organisation. The NUS Scotland awards were also announced on Saturday night at the conference. Lizzie Brough, EUSA Societies Development Coordinator, won the award for student union staff member of the year. She was commended for her work
RE-ELECTED: Robin Parker will serve another term as NUS President to engage more society office bearers with EUSA, tailoring support to better fit the needs of societies and developing and extending the Societies Oscars. EUSA also won the community relations award for bringing students together for neighbourhood partner-
ships and encouraging volunteering. Heriot Watt Students’ Association won the award for students’ association of the year. Nightline was nominated for society of the year and the news team of Fresh Air was nominated for the student media award.
University grows brain tissue
Nina Seale
BRAIN TISSUE is being grown by scientists at the University of Edinburgh to be used in testing potential treatments for schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Professor Charles Ffrench-Constant, Director of the CRM, explained the benefits of these tests to The Guardian, “A patient’s neurones can tell us a great deal about the psychological conditions that affect them, but you cannot stick a needle in someone’s brain and take out its cells. “Essentially, we are turning a person’s skin cells into brain. We are making cells that were previously inaccessible. "We could do that in future for the liver, the heart and other organs on which it is very difficult to carry out biopsies.” Between one and four per cent of the world’s population is affected by schizophrenia or bipolar disorder, for
which there are few effective treatments. The Centre for Regenerative Medicine (CRM) at the university has been focussing research on neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s disease, motor neurone disease and multiple sclerosis. Researchers have taken skin samples from patients suffering from these illnesses, turned them into stem cells and directed the new cells to make brain cells. Andrew McIntosh, a Professor of Biological Psychiatry at the university, explained how the man-made brain cells are used for this research, saying, “Once we have grown these in the laboratory we can then study the cells’ neurological function and see how they respond to standard psychiatric treatments. Following this we hope to be able to screen new medicines.” Scientists could previously only study affected brain tissue after an autopsy, but often these cells would be corrupted by the cause of death
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Roisin McKelvey
and any medication the patient had been taking for their condition. The project has received one million pounds from the National Centre for the Replacement, Refinement and Reduction of Animals in Research (NC3Rs) as one of the awards for a ‘Crack it’ initiative that rewards research programmes that focus on reducing the use of animals in their experiments. Dr Anthony Holmes, Programme Manager for Technology Development at the NC3Rs, told The Student, “Human induced … stem cells, have already attracted attention for the possibilities they offer to regenerate damaged tissues and organs. “But it is their potential to reduce animal use by providing an in vitro model that more closely resembles the disease in humans that attracted our attention to Dr McIntosh’s research.” The CRM also plans to use this method of studying affected brain tissue to learn more about multiple sclerosis.
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Nina Seale
FREE WIFI access could be made available on the streets of Edinburgh if the City of Edinburgh Council’s plans are approved by the UK government. The council intends to install open wireless zones in key areas of the city, including the city centre and along the tram route to Edinburgh Airport, in addition to public places such as the Meadows and Princes Street Gardens. In November last year, Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne introduced an Urban Broadband Fund of £100 million to create ten “superconnected” cities around the UK. As a capital city, Edinburgh is entitled to a substantial share of this fund estimated to be between seven and ten million pounds if its wi-fi provision bid is accepted. If the council’s plans are approved by the government, the wireless network will be implemented over the
next three years. Alex Neil MSP, Scottish Cabinet Secretary for Infrastructure and Capital Investment, praised the plans, saying that they went some way to fulfilling the ambition of the Scottish Government to include all its citizens in the “digital revolution”. He also emphasised the benefits for Edinburgh’s tourism industry, saying, “for Edinburgh, improved connectivity will specifically help enhance the digital economy and user experience in relation to tourism and the Edinburgh Festivals.” Attracting more than 3.5 million tourists each year, it is predicted that Edinburgh could benefit from high speed connectivity. Robin Worsnop, chair of Edinburgh Tourism Action Group (ETAG), expressed the need for Edinburgh to offer cutting-edge technology if it is to succeed as a centre for tourism. He said, “We really welcome this. It is projected that by 2015 there will be
more mobile devices on the planet than fixed PCs so we need to look at how we can invest in public infrastructure. “This is going to open up a lot of opportunities to allow them to enjoy a better experience and spend more money.” The council also hopes the free wifi provision will aid schools and other public sector bodies such as universities and NHS Scotland. Cameron Rose, Councillor of the Newington and Southside ward, which covers George Square and the surrounding area, said, “There are a lot of people looking for this kind of connectivity. “While the revenue costs will fall on the council there are opportunities for income generation because everyone wants this connectivity and the information that will come from it.” The funding Edinburgh will receive will be announced in the Chancellor's budget on 21 March.
Salmond's economic ideas questioned at debate on Scottish independence Thurston Smalley
THE ROYAL Society of Edinburgh played host to some of the UK’s foremost intellectuals and politicians on Friday for a conference organised by The Times on the future of an independent Scotland. The conference, which consisted of three panels focusing on the constitutionality, the economy and the ultimate viability of independence, was the largest and most important forum yet on the subject of devolution and Scottish independence. In his keynote address to the conference, Scottish First Minister Alex Salmond criticised Westminster prounion politicians, including Prime Minister David Cameron, for their unpopularity in Scotland, which he attributed to “negative contributions” to the country. He said, “It’s very difficult to have a positive rating and appreciation of your contribution to politics if the bulk and major part of your contribution comes across as a negative commentary.” Explaining why he believed his referendum on independence would be successful, Salmond said, “The No campaign remains mired in negativity [...] the campaign for independence will stay on the high ground.” He then listed projects that he be-
lieved an independent Scotland could undertake more successfully than a centralized Westminster government, such as the administration of Scottish universities. He said, “We’ve taken steps to ensure that certain goods and services we value are offered on a basis to make sure that everyone can afford them free tuition fees, for example." Deputy First Minister Nicola Sturgeon reaffirmed the SNP’s dedication to Scottish universities and ensuring they remain nationally and internationally competitive. She told The Student, “We already are effectively independent when it comes to the running of our education system, just as we are with the health service. “We welcome students from England, from the rest of Europe, from the world, and that will not change at all with independence. Salmond went on to outline reasons for Scottish independence, positing that Scotland’s economy could grow more quickly with independence, but that Scotland is currently “trying to promote economic recovery with one hand effectively tied behind our backs.” He said that low taxes on business had made Scotland attractive to investors and companies, which he claimed had contributed to a recession in Scotland that was shallower and shorter
than the one in England. Speaking to The Student, Professor Vernon Bogdanor CBE of King’s College, London, dismissed Salmond’s economic argument as irrelevant. He said, “It’s not a question of economics, it’s a question of identity. It’s a question of whether the Scots want to remain in the United Kingdom. “Put another way, if you could convince Alex Salmond by argument - by economic argument - that Scotland would be poorer after independence, would he then say, in that case, ‘I’m against it’? Of course not. It’s not that sort of argument. “It’s not for an Englishman to tell the Scots what to do, but you can spell out the consequences. And I think some people don’t realize [...] that the terms depend not only on Scotland but on the whole United Kingdom.” Scotland Editor for The Times, Magnus Linklater, told The Student he had a differing opinion. “I think that most people will vote on economic grounds. They will vote on the question of whether they will be better off or worse off under independence. “They will vote on the wallet rather than the heart. So what the SNP now need to convince the Scottish people of is that there is an economic case for independence.” Read more at bit.ly/studentsalmond
SUMMER SURFING: Free wi-fi could become available across Edinburgh
Internships improve job prospects, government report recommends
Katherine Stewart
STUDENTS SHOULD spend a summer holiday working as an intern in order to improve their employability, a government-commissioned report suggested this week. Sir Tim Wilson, the former vice-chancellor of the University of Hertfordshire, published his recommendations in the Review of BusinessUniversity Collaboration. He said that internships for undergraduates and work placements for PhD and postdoctoral research students would help graduates find work more quickly. Wilson studied universities such as Surrey, Aston, Bath and Loughbourough and found that students who either completed sandwich courses or had the experience of an internship were more employable after graduation. Wilson said, “I think we’re beginning to see internships being used as part of an extended interview process.” The report proposes a need for more sandwich courses (in which a year on placement in industry is part of the degree) as “evidence that a placement year improves employability opportunities is strong,” while “lack of work experience appears as a key barrier.” In the wake of the financial crisis and rising graduate unemployment, students often struggle to find work.
MARY-MONICA KAMEL
Council plans to provide free wi-fi across Edinburgh
To help solve this, the report advances other approaches in which a university can help a student find work, ranging from skills courses to mock interviews. Finally, the report argues that if companies are unable to pay for the internship, then universities to fund individual students. The report introduces the idea of using money agreed with the Office for Fair Access (OFFA) as the resource to ultimately finance these opportunities. Mike Williamson, Vice-President of Academic Affairs for EUSA told The Student that he had reservations about the study, expressing concern that universities “are not just about churning out employees for businesses.” He said, “Regarding Wilson’s specific suggestion, the Widening Access money agreed with OFFA is set aside to help people get into higher education - it shouldn’t be used for anything else. If universities want to spend money on this scheme, they should take it from other budgets.” Dr David Docherty, chief executive of the Council for Industry and Higher Education, told The Guardian, “For Wilson’s collaborative visions to become a reality, businesses and universities need government and other agencies to play their part. “This includes new and dynamic economic and industrial clusters. As Greece shows, the cost of failure is too horrible to contemplate.” Read more at bit.ly/studentintern
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Sam Bradley
STUDENT ACTIVISTS from across Scotland returned to Edinburgh last week to march against tuition fees and government austerity programmes in a protest named 'Not Another Lost Generation'. Between 250 and 300 protestors assembled in Charlotte Square last Wednesday before marching to the Scottish Parliament along the Royal Mile. The route led from the first minister’s official residence Bute House, across Princes Street, to the Grassmarket and then up West Bow onto the Royal Mile, escorted by officers from Lothian & Borders police. When the protest reached the Scottish Parliament a short rally was held. Green Party MSP Patrick Harvie spoke to the assembled protestors
and said, “There could not be a clearer example of the disparity between the interests of the one per cent and those who are being exploited, than the row over workfare. “I am concerned about this issue because I know that the same economic principles that hinder social progress are environmentally damaging. “It should not be an extremist statement to say that you want a fair day’s pay for a fair day’s work.” Students and anti-cuts activists from several groups including the National Campaign against Fees and Cuts, National Union of Students (NUS) and the Scottish Students against Cuts were present for the protest. At the rally after the march, speeches were delivered by a number of people, including NUS Scotland president Robin Parker and Liverpool Guild of Students president Maev McDaid. McDaid said, “The government
thought they could push their unpopularity onto student and blame us for their problems. “We were told the public sector is to blame and that the market would provide the solution - there is no market for us. Students have been thrown on the scrap heap like unwanted goods.” NUS president Robin Parker told the crowd, “We have a problem with our society and with the way we talk about education. "Other countries see education as the path to social mobility, the path to a better society – yet our government sees it as a dead weight.” Ben Beuan, a first year History student at the University of Edinburgh, was watching the protest. He told The Student, “They’re having fun, so that’s good. And it’s a good thing to protest. “It’s probably a bit left-wing for me, a bit extreme for my politics.”
MUSICAL ACTIVISM: 250 protestors marched through the city
SAM BRADLEY
Peaceful protest seeks to defend a generation
Edinburgh contribution to week of action finalised Alasdair Drennan
STUDENT ACTIVISTS from Edinburgh University Students’ Association (EUSA) has finalised its plans for a week of action due to take place next week from 12-16 March. The week will culminate in a ‘day of action’ taking place on Wednesday, when students will be asked to miss their classes and instead attend a picnic and festival in Bristo Square, where speakers will discuss the value of education. Josh Jones, one of the week’s organisers told The Student, “The walkout will be the focal point of the week and we encourage all students to avoid going to classes and instead take part in the exciting events on campus.” EUSA will organise other events
throughout the week, supporting their existing campaigns.
“
We encourage all students to avoid going to classes and instead take part in exciting events on campus." Josh Jones , week of action organiser As part of the ongoing campaign to improve accommodation, special interactive ‘Accommodation Boards’ will be set up around campus, which will ask students their opinions on accommodation and what they think is important in university accommodation.
There will be a competition to ‘pin the tail on Musselburgh' to highlight the distance some students must travel to get to university from the Queen Margaret University accommodation. The boards will also inform students about the way in which the accommodation services operate – displaying how much the university charges for rooms during the Easter holidays when some students must move out of their university provided accommodation. At the end of the week, the opinions gathered from the accommodation boards will be collated and presented to the university. It is also hoped that the petition calling for the university to provide a free bus to the Easter Bush vet campus. EUSA Academic Services Convenor and organiser of the Easter Bush Bus campaign Hugh Murdoch told The Student, “We hope to have the signatures
of 90 per cent of students at the Easter Bush campus by the week of action. “We will then take the bus from Easter Bush to the university and then form a walking bus to take the petition to university management.” A campaign will also be organised by the student council at the Edinburgh College of Art to press the university to limit expensive additional course costs. Art students sometimes have to shell out vast amounts for materials and the campaign will look to set up a fund to help pay for expensive materials such as gold. Throughout the week, students will also be encouraged to wear badges displaying how much they pay in fees to show their ‘value’ to the university. Murdoch brought a motion to the student council calling for EUSA to join the national week of action. He told The Student, “This week
of action is organised by the National Union of Students and will be happening alongside campus action at universities up and down the UK. “This is an exciting schedule of events which allows students to be involved in visible actions on their campuses on issues that affect them.” EUSA Undergraduate Representative James McAsh highlighted the importance of the week of action, telling The Student, “The week of action will focus attention on the undemocratic way that the university is run and will pressure senior management to take student concerns seriously.” Reacting to the possibility of a walkout, a spokesperson for the university told The Student, “The university respects the right of its students to air their concerns as long as it is done in a peaceful and constructive manner.”
Middle class benefit from Feminist and pro-life societies discuss abortion in public debate university expansion Jonathan Drake
SINCE 1992, more people in higher education come from middle-class households than come from lessprivileged backgrounds,according to data collected by the Institute of Social and Economic Research. The statistics come from a study of 40,000 households in the UK, examining the proportion of those holding a degree amongst 22 to 34 year olds and 37 to 49 year olds. They show that there has been a ten per cent rise in the number of students accessing higher education who, at the age of 14, had parents in ‘managerial and professional’ jobs. It was also demonstrated that the rise in access of those with parents running small businesses and other ‘intermediate occupations’ is in excess of 11 per cent. However, for the children of parents in ‘routine and manual occupations’, the percentage of those holding a degree is as low as five per cent. This research coincides with the appointment of Les Ebdon as head
of the Office for Fair Access – an organisation charged with ensuring fair access to university for all. Ebdon, upon his official appointment by business secretary Vince Cable, stated, “I am passionate about access to higher education and strongly believe that no one should be put off from going to university because of their family background or income.” Peter Elias, one of the survey’s coauthors, attempted to explain the results with changes to British society. He cites a rise in the number of people employed in middle class occupations compared to a decline in working class jobs during the last 40 years. However, he went on to say that, “Given the remarkable increase in the participation of young people in higher education that has taken place over the last 20 years, the brief analysis presented here reveals little evidence that the much vaunted policy ambition – to provide better access to higher education for those from less privileged backgrounds – has been successful.”
Lewis Macdonald
Appleton Tower was the scene of a debate on abortion on Thursday 1st March, co-sponsored by the Edinburgh University Feminists’ Society and the Edinburgh Pro-Life Society. The debate was chaired by EUSA president Matt McPherson and invited a panel of experts to discuss the issue and take questions from the floor. The panel was made up of Elain Gallacher, the education officer for the Cardinal Winning Pro-Life Initiative; Breedagh Hughes, the director for the Royal College of Midwives in Northern Ireland; Professor Dr Calum MacKellar, visiting professor of Bioethics at St Mary’s University College in Twickenham; and Professor Dr Wendy Savage, a gynaecologist and obstetrician and the former press officer for Doctors for the Woman’s Right to Choose an Abortion. The debate began with a short introduction of both the co-sponsors’ views on the issue and responses to
the opposing view. Hilary Cornish and EUSA VPAA Mike Williamson made the case for the Feminist Society and Christopher Oldroyd and Laura Lynch (the vice-president and an ordinary member respectively) spoke for the Pro-Life Society. During both the introductory talk and the debate there were instances of laughter and heckling from the audience, prompting Matt McPherson to ask that the debate continue in a respectful manner. Both Hughes and Professor Savage made reference to the abortion situation in Northern Ireland, which has different abortion laws to other parts of the UK. As in the Republic of Ireland, abortion is illegal except in cases where allowing a pregnancy to continue would threaten the life of the mother. Professor Savage said it was “a scandal” that women in Northern Ireland cannot access safe, legal abortion. Hughes elaborated, stating that women seeking abortions in both Northern Ireland and the Republic must travel to other parts of the UK where they must pay up to £2,000 for
the procedure, as they cannot receive the treatment on the NHS. Professor Savage responded to stories of women suffering postabortion trauma referred to by an audience member by saying that women she had treated regretted the act of intercourse that resulted in needing an abortion, rather than their abortion itself. Gallacher and Professor MacKellar reinforced the case made by the Pro-Life Society that life begins at conception and that abortion is the destruction of a unique human life. They went on to argue that abortion was a quick-fix solution that would not solve the underlying problems that caused women to require abortions and that women should be presented with a full range of options when having a ‘crisis pregnancy’. Although the debate was interrupted several times by people speaking out of turn, it proceeded smoothly, with many questions from the audience being answered and panellists responding to one another’s points.
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1 ½ cup flour 1 ½ cup oats 1 cup packed brown sugar 1 teaspoon baking powder ½ teaspoon salt 1 ¾ stick salted butter, cut into pieces 1 jar apricot preserve
Mix together all ingredients except apricot preserve. Press one half of the mixture into a buttered 8” square (or small rectangular pan). Spread with a 10-12 ounce jar of apricot preserve. Sprinkle second half of oat mixture over the top and pat lightly. Bake at 180 degrees for 30-40 minutes or until light brown. Let cool completely, then cut into squares.
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Comment 7
Turning a blind eye Allow me to take you back awhile into the misty past of last year. A year of excited passions, of protest, even revolution- we thought. We all watched gleefully as Tunisia liberated itself, Egypt followed, but then Libya stumbled and our government, along with the US, got the UN mandate with remarkable alacrity and aided the people to their eventual triumph. What happened then however is a dark blot in our memories. While many could agree that Gaddafi had committed injustices, it is customary – and should be even in times of high emotion and war – to have a trial before you condemn someone to death. Instead of a worthy example of an impartial justice system at work we saw a baying mob beat a man to death. Videos became available and were circulated on the internet. Tabloid newspapers celebrated the event – The Sun with its usual dignity afforded to the loss of human life responded, “that’s for Lockerbie, Gaddafi” and we were to believe that this was somehow our victory for the material support we offered. At the moment that the crowds tore him to pieces, however, every liberal who had supported the cause must have felt the same unearthly shiver I felt. These were not the pure, gentle heroes that we assumed from our liberal intellectual bubble. We all hoped for the best, that this war of liberation would not lead to the atrocities we are so used to. We hoped in vain. Recently a video sourced from liveleak.com and reported on Russia Today revealed some of the rebels' darker acts.
The video depicts black Africans, locked in a cage, their hands bound and green fabric dangling from their mouths – the old flag of the Gaddafi regime. The story, from the rebels’ side, is that these were mercenaries who were in the employ of Gaddafi. If we were to take this as true, would the act be any more acceptable? It would still be the forcefeeding, imprisonment, and humiliation of people without the sentencing of any court. This can only be described as torture. Now let us turn to the evidence: Human Rights Watch said there were no mercenaries in eastern Libya despite reports in international media that African soldiers had been flown in. The black soldiers fighting for Gaddafi were from Libya, the south of the country. The rebels have decided to react against all the black people in Libya. Apologists might claim that it is understandable that the Libyan people would react extremely against the army, but this is a flawed argument. There is evidence that the rebels, throughout the course of the war, have been racist. Black Libyans were driven out of Misrata early in the war, there have been reported lynchings and massacres, and every rebel conquest led to violence and the displacement of black Libyans. By September 1 2011 they had rounded up two hundred detainees, all black. Some were migrant workers; others native Libyans. Despite promises of legality from the rebels’ National Transitional Council, Amnesty International and the African Union warned of potential
RACIST: The Libyan rebels have victimised migrant workers based on their skin colour abuse. Several months later we see this video of public humiliation and torture, with no evidence of fair treatment, little evidence suggesting that these men have done anything wrong and a multitude of evidence that the rebels who have taken power are a racist force and always have been. What does it say about the quality of our media coverage that so many of these events have been ignored? At the time of writing, Russia Today and the Daily Mail are the only news outlets that have reported the story. This is a
shocking indication of the state of our news organisations. In a classic case of the media painting a narrative that is, at best, naive and, at worst, grossly misleading; the media has allowed racist atrocities to be committed without their adequate reporting. What does this say about the state of our current media? The New York Times completely ignored the story, and it is not hard to find video evidence online of lynchings in Libya by the rebels. The Times also ignored the story in order to support the rebels. As a result of widespread misinfor-
Look past the numbers
mation, the public has been led into supporting military intervention against an inconvenient dictator, in the face of the widely available knowledge that the rebels were committed to atrocities on a grand scale. All of this information is available on the internet and it does not seem a stretch to ask of our mainstream media why they refused to cover the truth. Newspapers, on this occasion, have proven themselves to be little more than entertaining diversions rather than the distributors of knowledge they claim.
Rosie Stock Jones argues quotas for women can mask deeper structural inequalities in the media and the workplace
Women’s position in the world of work is finally ranking high on the agenda, as the ‘Pro Quote’ campaign in Germany draws support. Hundreds of top German female journalists have signed a letter, sent to editors and publishers, demanding that a quota of 30 per cent of executive positions should be allocated to women. Guardian journalist Kira Cochrane brings this issue back to Britain, with her own research revealing that the involvement of women in the public sphere, both in politics and across newspapers, sits at around 22 per cent. This is a serious improvement on the 1960s, but women make up 51 per cent the UK population, so we can only be halfway down the road to equality. Perhaps a quota is the solution here too? Instinctively, many would argue it is not. The recent EUSA referendum proposed a 40 per cent quota for NUS delegates and was met with a resounding ‘No’ vote from the student body. Perhaps students’ immediate reaction was to ridicule the idea of gender issues at a university where more students
are female than male. It can be easy to forget that there is still a fight to be had for women’s representation, given that women now rival men in many areasespecially in education. In schools, girls have been found to perform slightly better than boys and the Higher Education Statistics Agency found that women are more likely than men to be employed six months after graduation. Yet Cochrane’s research shows that newspaper bylines, radio chat shows, TV discussion panels and politics, are all dominated by men. When there is a greater number of educated young women graduating than men, and only a tiny fraction of them making it into the public sphere, something is certainly going wrong. Yet the reasons are complicated and fraught with gender stereotypes and expectations. To suggest that imposing a quota is the solution seems overly simplistic. The very same journalists calling for a quota in Germany also appear to acknowledge its inadequacy; by not asking for a truly equal 50 per cent, surely they are conceding the unattainability
of such a goal, admitting the existence of underlying issues a quota cannot address.
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It can be easy to forget that there is still a fight to be had for women's representation, given that women now rival men in many areas." A quota for female executives and employees may even mask the real issues. It is all too easy to go through the steps of setting and filling a quota without sparking any real change. While proponents of quotas argue that more women are needed in the system to break down the masculine culture, there is a real danger that a quota could normalise such a culture for women;
hiding the problem in corrected figures, without removing the barrier to female success. So what are these underlying issues that women face? The likelihood is that they have a lot to do with a ‘long hours culture’ of work for executive positions and an alienating masculine environment, especially in the media. When combined with ‘care’, such a ‘long hours culture’ can be a serious stumbling block for female achievement. Since the 1950s, women have gone from being expected to stay at home and care for their families, to being expected to work full time. Yet studies have shown that in most cases women are still expected to perform care work. More importantly, many of them want to and it is here that the complexity lies: addressing the balance between work and care, so that women are not made to choose one or the other, whilst ensuring no one is reverting to stereotypes. On top of this, a male centred public life is the norm, yet the fewer women that appear in public, such as on panels and talk shows, the
REMI OCHLIK
Fraser Horn attacks the mainstream media's willful ignorance of rebel atrocities in Libya
more intimidating it becomes for others and the deeper embedded a culture of male dominance becomes. The solution to these deep rooted social problems cannot come from something as simple as a quota. Women who appear in the public sphere need vocal and visible support and executive positions need to offer and promote flexible hours and job sharing, so that women can control how they divide their time, rather than being forced to opt out. It is often easy for us as students, protected by the well-established equality in education, to see gender gaps as irrelevant. Yet given the situation of female representation in wider society, maybe we should take a closer look at where it all begins and how it goes wrong. Let’s hope the student body’s ‘No’ vote to a female quota for NUS delegates reflects an understanding of the token nature of a quota and is not taken as a mandate for the more complex issues concerning gender, both at our university and in the rest of the UK, to get overlooked.
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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8 Comment
The lonely right
Changing opinions on social issues have isolated the Republican party, argues Lewis Macdonald
As Israel attempts to turn the heat up on Iran over its nuclear energy programme, Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu is increasingly coming across like that kid at primary school who told everyone his big brother was a champion wrestler only for someone to find out he worked at Woolworths. This week Netanyahu was at the White House throwing a tantrum at the US president’s reluctance to come in and lay the smackdown on Ahmadinejad, as Bibi had promised all his pals in the playground. Netanyahu’s role as the whiny little brother in the relationship was confirmed last year when Obama was overheard saying to Nicolas Sarkozy, “You’re fed up with him? I have to deal with him every day,” a line that could have come straight out of Malcolm in the Middle East. Worryingly, America has been all too willing to play the role of the lycra-clad muscle-bound thug in recent years and like any selfrespecting big brother it would be almost certain to step into the ring should Israel decide to take on Iran, a scenario which is looking increasingly likely. Obama alluded to his martial prowess in an interview with The Atlantic on Friday, “These are difficult questions and if I were the prime minister of Israel I’d be wrestling with them,” he said. “As President of the United States, I wrestle with them as well.” Can you smell what Barack is cooking? The trash talk continued in true WWE style with Obama assuring Ahmadinejad that “I don’t bluff ”, although of course this could itself be bluffing. America is looking less and less like the prize fighter it may have once been and more like a wheezing, washed-up sleazebag ranting about its former glories in a seedy bar. While Obama might love to see the back of the vehemently anti-imperialist theocratic regime in Iran, he knows that war in the region could prove to be pyrrhic for the over-stretched American empire. This is the dilemma that Obama now faces. He has to attempt to calm Netanyahu's bloodthirsty rhetoric in order to avoid being dragged into a drawn out conflict with Iran, but at the same time make it known that he would back Israel when the time comes in order to save face. His halfhearted claim that "we've got Israel's back" reeks of weary resignation rather than bellicose enthusiasm. Joel Sharples
LEFT-LEANING: The tide is turning on the issue of same-sex marriage SAMESEX MARRIAGE in America has undergone something of a renaissance in the last few years. Since the election of Barack Obama in November 2008, made bittersweet by the passage of Proposition 8 in California the same night (legislation that reversed the state’s decision to legalise same-sex marriage), it seemed that marriage equality was fated to remain within the boundaries of socially liberal Massachusetts. However, it has since spread across these borders into places that might have seemed, if not absolutely opposed, at least resistant to the idea just four years ago. A bellwether for this trend was Iowa, whose Supreme Court upheld a ruling that there was no reason to deny marriage licences to same-sex couples in April 2009, effectively legalising same-sex marriage judicially rather than legislatively. Although the issue remains contentious in the state, it must smart to Republicans that Iowa, smack-bang in the conservative heartland of the Midwest, continues
FLICKR: NATHANMAC87
Brothers in arms
to rebuff efforts to introduce an amendment to the state constitution banning same-sex marriage. The state of New York was next, passing a bill in June last year after years of attempts that had met annihilation in the state senate. February this year was an encouraging month for the cause. The states of Washington and Maryland both passed bills to legalise same-sex marriage, with their governors promising to sign them into law. The New Jersey legislature has done the same, but Republican governor Chris Christie has refused to sign it, arguing that the issue should be turned over to the public vote as it was in California. Speaking of which, Proposition 8 has received the cold shoulder from the California judiciary, who have ruled that the measure violates the Equal Protection Clause of the United States Constitution. Furthermore, President Obama’s justice department has concluded that DOMA (the Defence Of Marriage Act) is unconstitutional and will not defend it
in court. The message that these last two developments in particular send, that the rights of a minority cannot be voted away by the majority, will prove useful in rolling back constitutional amendments that were voted on in many states over the last decade. It might seem populist of Republicans to say ‘let the people decide’ and leave it at that, but it is clear that the judiciaries on the state and the federal level have replied ‘the people don’t get to decide which rights a minority should and should not receive.’ What else do Republicans think should be put to the public vote? Women’s reproductive health, for one. Last year Mississippi rejected a measure that would have defined life as beginning at the moment of conception. The aim was, clearly, to outlaw abortion; a side-effect, that may or may not have been present in the measure’s proponents, but was clearly present in the minds of voters, would be a ban on many forms of contraception.
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The country is becoming, if not more liberal, then at least less sure of involving itself in marital beds and family homes." Far from being cowed by this result, Republicans across the country and at all levels of government have tried to further the issue, introducing restrictions to abortion providers, throwing a tantrum over religious freedoms when the Obama administration suggested requiring that Catholic employers include contraception in their health insurance and passing a bill in Virginia that would mandate a vaginal ultrasound to any woman seeking
an abortion, without the woman’s consent. Small government, indeed. It is not that Republicans don’t have some sense on these issues. Legalisation of same-sex marriage in New York, Washington and Maryland saw Republicans voting on both sides of the issue. Republican women have been outraged by their male colleagues’ attempts to legislate for their uteruses. Some Republicans recognise that the culture wars are over. Sadly, many Republicans seem determined to perpetuate them in order to appeal to an electorate that has been shrinking for many years. Polls across the country indicate widespread support for access to birth control and family planning. For the first time in May last year, a Gallup poll showed more Americans were for same-sex marriage than against it. The country is becoming, if not more liberal, then at least less sure of involving itself in marital beds and family homes. Why, then, does the Republican party have the field of candidates that it currently does? Each candidate has endorsed the view that personhood begins at conception, with current front runner Rick Santorum presenting himself as decidedly against contraception. Three of them derided judicial opposition to Proposition 8 and all of them have decidedly un-nuanced opinions on the definition of marriage. Famously, at one of the uncountable Republican debates last year, a question was posed by a gay soldier asking whether the candidates would reinstate the policy of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell in the US military. The question was booed by the audience and shrugged off by the candidates. The Republican Party seems to have fundamentally misunderstood the drift of public opinion on these issues. This will give them no advantage, except among their socially conservative base, in the election this year.
Vacuous vendettas
Daniel Scott Lintott picks apart the basis of the Conservative opposition to wind farms
IN A recent letter to the prime minister, a squadron of over one hundred Conservative MPs launched an attack against onshore wind turbines, asking Cameron to cut the already minimal subsidy for the renewable energy source. Being the political wing with the highest proportion of its ranks abhorring carbon cutting measures, the question is whether this request is justified or if it is a general war against green energy at large. As with most misleading false dichotomies, the answer is probably secret option number three. The initial claim of the letter is that in “financially straightened times” the taxpayer should not have to pay for an apparently “inefficient and intermittent” energy source. This suggestion condemns wind turbines as inefficient in spite of a credible body of evidence dispelling this myth. Dr Robert Gross, Director of the Centre for Energy Policy and Technology at Imperial College London, claims that intermittency accounts for less than ten per cent of the costs of power generation. I think its safe to say Dr Gross knows a little bit more than these MPs about this particular area. Moreover, according to the UK Electricity Generation Costs Update by Mott MacDonald, onshore wind
turbines are the cheapest of all renewable energy. Similarly, such turbines account for about 0.75 per cent of the average energy bill, translating into roughly £5 a year. This investment crucially reduces exposure to rising prices of international gas, which will save money on the nation’s energy bill. So with a modest amount of tedious, yet important, research we can relatively comfortably label these Tory gripes as hot air.
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With a modest amount of tedious, yet important, research, we can relatively comfortably label these Tory gripes as hot air." However, they also suggest that the savings made from the cut in onshore wind turbines could be used for all the “other types”, a suitably vague catchall phrase, of renewable energy sources. Onshore wind turbines are the cheapest of all renewable energy sources and are
by no means inefficient. They are a very useful way of reducing the UK’s carbon emissions, which is after all a legal requirement for the government that these MPs are calling on. Without being too inflammatory, it seems that the hundred or so MPs that signed the letter to Cameron have rigorously ignored the evidence and grounded their objections in poorly researched assertions. The evaluation of efficiency of renewable energy sources is most definitely a viable task and one that is crucial in the reduction of carbon emissions, not just in the UK, but also across the globe. So if these Conservatives have so cunningly ignored information that a first year university student could find in an afternoon, what is the real issue? The second half of the letter may reveal all. They continue; “We also are worried that the new National Planning Policy Framework, in its current form, diminishes the chances of local people defeating unwanted onshore wind farm proposals through the planning system.” The main concern is that local residents and authorities may lack power to raise concerns over the development of their surrounding areas. The fear of the MPs is that if the building of wind turbines takes precedence, it will make it impossible to
defeat applications through the planning system. People should undoubtably have a right to contest what is built in their local area and their views should be considered in planning applications. However, propagating fiction about a legitimately viable source of renewable energy, which would effectively help the government achieve its legally binding carbon reduction, is unjustified. It is also interesting to look at a map showing the proposed and existing wind turbines in relation to the constituencies of the MPs who complained. As you might have guessed there are nice little clusters of wind turbines in and around the highlighted constituencies. Do they just have a personal vendetta against these large white poles? More seriously, such accusations have recently led to major companies holding off on investments in renewable energy in the UK. Vestas, leading turbine manufacturer, have postponed their development pending this political unease. Their project would create two thousand jobs in Kent, the designated site. It is distressing that the unfounded vague assertions of a minority of Conservative MPs to protect their own constituencies has potentially compromised the environmental progress of technology in the UK.
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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Comment 9
Dodging the dole
WASTED POTENTIAL: Young graduates queue outside the job centre to raise awareness of rising unemployment BRITAIN’S SKYHIGH unemployment figures are increasingly becoming a worry for graduates-to-be. Many of us believed we would emerge from university unscathed, with the effects of recessional damage well behind us. However, the latest forecast of a nine per cent unemployment increase suggests otherwise. As we all inch closer to our graduations, confidence in our future plans is
marred by fear of the unknown. In the face of gruelling competition on the job market, students are bound to be asking themselves where they’re going to end up. A peek at post-recessional America can give us an indication of what may be in store. With the American economy having emerged from a particularly rough spell, there have been significant changes to the structure of employment. On the
positive side, graduate prospects and availability of internships are on the rise. A recent study states that employers plan to hire 9.5 per cent more graduates this year, the healthiest figures since 2009. However, when most positions available require specialisation in technology and engineering, it seems that the remainder are left with limited options and have to seek alternative ways to make a living. One in three American workers
GOOGLE IMAGES: JO FURNIVAL
Yasmin Morgan-Griffiths looks at what we can learn from attempts to tackle youth unemployment in the US are now in contingent, temporary or freelance employment. The availability of such posts has contributed greatly to the steady decrease in unemployment and job creation of about two hundred thousand positions a year. On the face of things, this is good news for the recovering American economy and a glimmer of hope for anxious graduates who had expected to be indefinitely jobless. However, many employees are being excluded by their employers from schemes and institutions designed to provide stability and peace of mind, such as health insurance, workers’ compensation and Social Security. Turning our attention back to beloved Blighty, some intriguing comparisons manifest themselves. The number of self-employed workers shot up towards the end of 2011, with the official figures standing at 4.12 million. These statistics show encouraging evidence of the initiative, tenacity and overall successfulness of British entrepreneurs and freelancers. Access to a wide range of temporary workers means that companies can compile a team of people with specific skills to complete specialised projects and enables them to respond promptly to changing demand with access to a range of experts at short notice. Certainly, wide scale job creation is necessary in order to kickstart the economy, but workers themselves are often exploited. Employers who hire on a contingent basis are not legally obliged to pay national insurance, provide sick pay, holidays or even the minimum wage. It’s incredible how such swindling is allowed to continue so unashamedly
in stark public view. What we need is more rights, more focus on providing safety mechanisms and more equal opportunities for our rapidly evolving workforce. Graduates are potentially the greatest hope for the economy’s recovery, as they bring fresh, innovative ideas to businesses who need to boost productivity. David Cameron has stated that, “The future of our economy depends on a new generation of entrepreneurs coming up with ideas, resolving to make them a reality and having the vision to create wealth and jobs.” It’s obviously not realistic for all graduates to become entrepreneurs, but many may end up working in jobs requiring specific skills on a self-employed basis. So why continue to exploit those who valiantly create their own opportunities? Those with the motivation to succeed and the initiative to do so should no longer be subjugated by irresponsible employers. America’s economy is still down by ten million jobs from the ideal amount, and it may take until 2020 to attain the desired target. An ever increasing number of graduates on both sides of the Atlantic are being pulled into contingent employment due to a lack of work experience. Weighed down with enormous debts and facing the impossibility of getting experience in their desired fields, times look hard for those soon to finish university. In order to avoid the same dilemma, our government needs to learn from America’s mistakes by providing support and security for our graduates, those most vulnerable yet most vital to the recovery of the future British economy.
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Let's hear it!: features@studentnewspaper.org
1 Features
How safe are we?
Eloise Kohler highlights the simple steps we can take towards furthering student safety in Edinburgh
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Silence about male victims supports unhealthy expectations about men and their supposed invulnerability and thus it is essential to reinforce that all these guidelines are applicable and useful to boys as well." Other notable findings included 12 per cent of those surveyed having been stalked while at university or college and 16 per cent of respondents having experienced unwanted kissing, touching or molesting during their time as a student. This illustrates an alarmingly high level of prevalence. In response to the results, Sandra Horley, CEO of domestic violence charity Refuge remarked that, “it is vital that universities can create an environment where women feel confident to speak out against abuse. Women have the right to enjoy university life,
heavily populated student areas could be made a lot less dangerous with proper lighting - various patches of the Meadows are currently threateningly dark. It is also important for the university to work closely with the Edinburgh police force and invite police liaison officers to hold regular talks on current issues.
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If you do have to walk home alone be alert, walk confidently and avoid carrying all your possessions in one bag. Stick to well-lit roads, plan your journey before you leave and don't walk with your headphones in."
STUDENT SAFETY: know what help is available to you and avoid feeling left in the dark focus on their studies and plan for their futures, without fear of intimidation or violence.” Yet these figures suggest the contrary to her ideals and the university needs to take responsibility to implement a cultural change to prevent these crimes. When typing a quick search into Google for university advice on how to keep safe in Edinburgh, you’d be astonished to see just how little information they provide. Their 'Safety in Edinburgh' page consists of two short paragraphs noting that the Meadows and Holyrood park are more precarious areas and are “not recommended to single persons during hours of darkness”. The page then directs you to a Safety First leaflet published by the British Council. The Safety First leaflet is actually intended as a guide for international students, so multiple sections are irrelevant to the majority of Edinburgh students. There is a page about 'Safety on the streets' which offers twelve tips on how to keep out of danger, but none of which are Edinburgh specific and most of which are blatantly obvious - “avoiding confrontation” and “don’t carry large amounts of cash with you when you are out” being two of the more condescending recommendations. It seems surprising that with this dearth of information, and especially after the recent attacks, EUSA has not been at the forefront of providing
guidance on keeping safe in Edinburgh. Whilst attending an Amnesty International meeting last week, they were discussing the very relevant topic of female welfare at university. When asked whether it was safer to be on the phone to someone on the walk home or to keep your belongings hidden away, I was clueless. These are the basic precautions the university needs to be advising students on. Students need to know where they can seek help and it is important that they feel sure that their reports will be taken seriously if anything does happen. There are a number of simple suggestions the university could implement immediately to make their students safer. Most obviously, it is essential that the support services are publicised more, as currently many are unfamiliar with the available sources of help. Speaking to Ginette Lowe, senior welfare adviser at The Advice Place, she provided some invaluable advice for staying safe at university. “Edinburgh is typically a very safe city, you need to apply the usual level of caution you would in any medium sized city. Try to avoid walking home alone in the dark. However, if you do have to walk home alone, be alert, walk confidently and avoid carrying all your possessions in one bag. Stick to well-lit roads, plan your journey before you leave and don’t walk with your headphones in. Let someone know you have left and what time they should expect you home.”
Alternatively, if at all apprehensive, call a taxi, making sure to check the driver’s name when you make the booking and that the company is licensed - after all what is £10 if you get home safe and sound? She also added, “The Advice Place has free personal safety alarms that are available for all students. Remember our instincts exist for a reason, if a person or place is making you feel unsafe, trust that instinct and assertively remove yourself from that situation if you can. If you or someone you know thinks they may have been the victim of a crime then remember that your Advice Place is a remote reporting station, this means you can come and report it to us if you do not want to report it to the police, we will be entirely guided by your wishes and well being, you do not have to face it alone. Visit our website for more details.” It is hard to find guidance that qualifies as relevant for all, but it seems apt that the university should be providing leaflets with some basic safety tips. After scouring police reports, there are a variety of little-known hints that everyone would benefit from being made aware of. From the ability to make a reverse charge call (where the call is paid for by the person receiving it rather than the one making it) by dialling 100, to the fact that it is much safer to walk facing the traffic so a car cannot pull up unnoticed behind you. Although not a campus university,
MATT DALE
GLANCING OVER your shoulder, hurrying along the darkened meadows path, you think you see someone out of the corner of your eye. You walk a little faster. It’s 3am, you’ve lost your friends after a night of partying and you’re now faced with the task of walking home alone. Everyone you know, your friends and family, have cautioned time and time again that “a girl should NEVER walk home on her own late at night”. But why is this the case? In a city we consider home, shouldn’t students feel safe when night descends over Edinburgh? Unfortunately, recent attacks have highlighted that this isn’t the case. Hidden Marks, the first ever account of its kind, was a nationwide report into female students’ experience of harassment, stalking, violence and sexual assault. The National Union of Students carried out the survey in 2010 and over 2,000 students studying (or having studied) in England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland took part. It provided a shocking snapshot of the female students’ university experience, with by far the most staggering result being that one in seven of the respondents had experienced a serious physical or sexual assault during their time as a student. This is a horrifying fact, and suggests that, if the statistics are true, all of us know someone who has been attacked whilst at university.
It’s crucial to be aware of your own safety and if you are concerned, there are steps you can take. For instance, there are multiple self-defence classes provided by the university and to reiterate, free personal safety alarms available to all. Above all, remain vigilant. Whilst the Hidden Marks survey was only quantifying female student experiences, men can also be victims of sexual or physical assault. In fact, the British Crime Survey found that young men are twice as likely to be victims of physical assault than women. Silence about male victims supports unhealthy expectations about men and their supposed invulnerability and thus it is essential to reinforce that all these guidelines are applicable and useful to boys as well. After the horrific attacks last semester, EUSA introduced the Meadows walking bus - an ingenious concept, but unfeasible in the long-term. We can only urge UK policy-makers, universities, police, student unions and academics to address the harrowing problem and establish more preventative measures. Students should not be left in any doubt that such behaviour will be tolerated.
If you have been affected by anything in this article or would just like to find out more, don't hesitate to visit The Advice Place website where you will find the help you need: www.eusa.ed.ac.uk/advice
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Features 11
Sense and sensationalism
STAPLES: How different will the newsstands of the future look? IT HASN’T been an easy nine months for News International. Since Nick Davies broke the story about the phone hacking scandal in The Guardian in July 2011, daily revelations about the extent of corruption in Rupert Murdoch’s British publications have littered the newspapers. The saga seems unending; each revelation is more outrageous and more distressing than the last. Only recently five senior journalists
GRAHAM HOLLIDAY
Rachel Wilson considers the future of tabloid journalism in a post-Leveson world
at The Sun were arrested in a police payments probe. With so many unnerving allegations being made about the apparently deplorable practices of the British press, many are speculating what exactly the future holds for our newsstands. Set up by David Cameron after the closure of Sunday paper The News of the World, the Leveson Inquiry has been the biggest challenge to journalism in
recent history and arguably the biggest obstacle for tabloid journalism since its popularisation at the turn of the century. The first part of the Leveson Inquiry aims to “inquire into the culture, practices, and ethics of the press,” investigating the relationship between the press and the police and will address the “future conduct” of the press, relating to the stories they publish and their relationship with public officials. The second part of the Inquiry is dedicated specifically to an investigation of “the extent of unlawful or improper conduct” within News International. So far the Leveson Inquiry has proved interesting to follow, especially as it makes official public anxieties over the reporting of celebrity culture in tabloid newspapers and gossip magazines. More interesting still have been the responses and defences given by the editors of these publications in the face of probing moral questions. However, the message from all participants has been clear: British journalism must be ‘cleaned up’, but in striving for regulation we must maintain the freedom of the press. It’s a difficult reconciliation. The tabloid was made popular by tabloid journalism pioneer Alfred Harmsworth, a newspaper magnate of the late nineteenth and early twentieth century. His reform of failing papers gave the prototype for tabloids today: an emphasis on the sensationalised reporting of crime, sex and scandal. If this cocktail is what made the tabloids take off in the first place, how are they
to survive without it? Sensationalisation is exciting, regulation dull. While the illegal practices are self evidently wrong and stringent measures need be put in place to prevent these continuing, there has been a sense of urgency surrounding the inquiry. It presents an important opportunity for us to reassess our media and what it reports. An important development in the inquiry saw women’s campaigners give evidence on the sexualised and damaging portrayal of women in the press. Celebrities have spoken sincerely about the intrusive nature of tabloid journalism which cannot be defended as within the public interest.
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If the cocktail of crime, sex and scandal is what made the tabloids take off in the first place, how are they to survive without it?" Yet if this changes, what will the tabloids and gossip magazines be left with? It was interesting to see the launch of The Sun on Sunday, which, as Roy Greenslade noted, read more like Take a Break than a tabloid newspaper. Though largely deemed uncontroversial and even bland, can we take this to be a new, tamed form of tabloid jour-
nalism emerging? Perhaps. But many feel this to be purely a facade; despite the initial buzz around the Leveson Inquiry, there exists also a tangible sense of unease surrounding it. Though The Sun editor Dominic Mohan modestly admitted that headlines such as “Tran or woman?” had possibly “gone too far” and that he “probably” wouldn’t print the same now, he appeared unapologetic and insisted The Sun was a “real force for good”. In the face of such performances from editors of tabloids and gossip magazines, many have expressed scepticism as to how much the Leveson Inquiry can change the press. After all, to what extent is it an editor’s job to act as moral guide for the public? These publications sell well, so a readership that doesn’t object to their stories obviously exists; indeed The News of the World was forced to close in light of the scandal not because of a waning readership, but because a plethora of companies pulled their advertisements. This is certainly a crucial time for the British press to not only put an end to their illegal practices, but to take a fresh look at their place in and effect on society. Whether this will lead to an overhaul of the tabloid press or just a temporarily subdued one we are yet to see. Only once the investigations are complete will we have a better picture of where the press can and will go thereafter. Hopefully the necessary changes will be made so we can browse our newsstands with trust once again.
Friends forever?
THIS WEEK it has already happened once in Black Medicine, twice walking home on Nicolson St and numerous times in the library. Facebook friends blanking, ignoring, or offering a feeble ‘hi’ as I walk past them. All people added online over four years at university, all people who have seen photos of my recent holiday, my family at Christmas and my 16 year old self on the last day of high school (thanks Timeline). Throughout university, “I’ll add you on Facebook” is a common end to a 4am walk home through the Meadows with new acquaintances. Then you wake up in the morning to find they actually have. You cannot refuse because that would be awkward next time they were in the Library Bar. However having too many Facebook friends is causing anxiety amongst many young people. A study conducted last month by Dr Kathy Charles of Edinburgh Napier University found that more than three in ten students said they felt guilty about rejecting friend requests. The study also found that 12 per cent of those questioned said they disliked receiving friend requests, while almost two thirds (63 per cent) said they delayed replying to friend requests. Unless we change the way we engage with Facebook post-university these Facebook friends are likely to see our
future wedding, first children and 40th birthday party all online. Perhaps now is the time to curb the online openhouse policy of university. Coming towards the end of fourth year, many students are concerned with potential employers checking their social media accounts. But what about on a personal level after university; how do we decide who stays and who goes and does it even matter?
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One fourth year I spoke to suggested that deleting one person a day is a suitable method to gently reduce your number of Facebook friends." One fourth year I spoke to suggested that deleting one person a day is a suitable method to gently reduce your number of Facebook friends. Another suggested that each log in for you should mean a permanent log out of your life for someone else. David, an exchange student at Edinburgh, said that he has a private
personal account and another more open general account, “I actually have two Facebook accounts, one for friends and one for friends.” A popular reason for adding and keeping casual acquaintances from university days is that they could be useful in the future. Hannah, a final year business student, stated that her Facebook friends from university could be beneficial contacts in her career. Yet she also suggested that the combination of personal use and professional image online had become difficult. “I hardly ever post stuff on Facebook anymore as there is too much of a mix of people on there.” Reluctance to share information is worrying to a company that profits from exactly that. Being deleted on Facebook is offensive. Even if you don’t particularly want to be friends with someone, it is the fact that they have gone out of their way to remove you that is cutting. Post-university we all need a spring cleaning of our Facebook accounts. There are many who happily overshare online, but for the more restrained the choice is to share less or to restrict access. The world’s most successful social networking site has found a way to replicate almost every aspect of human
PRESSING REQUESTS: Three in ten students feel quilty rejecting them interaction online. Having a conversation (wall posts), telling someone a secret (private message) and sharing pictures (tagging), but Mark Zuckerberg is yet to find a Facebook equivalent of people just drifting apart. Rarely in real life do we walk up to someone and very publicly say to their face, “we are not
friends anymore,” yet that is the comparable social act of deleting someone on Facebook. An online action with no real life equivalent. Names have been changed throughout this article to protect their identity. And in case they have already deleted you.
KAYSHA
Facebook isn't just for university, Harrison Kelly looks at how to deal with old friends
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Welcome to the pills with skills
LISA LANGE
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
WHILE MOST pharmaceutical companies worldwide are working relentlessly to provide cheaper, more efficient drugs to control disease, bigger ideas are brimming in a laboratory in Redwood City, California. Proteus Biomedical, a Silicon Valley based company investing heavily in medical electronics, is engineering a ‘smart’ pill – one that monitors the effects of taking other pills. Proteus founder George Savage explains that the concept was born from the fact that a large proportion of medical problems actually stem from the use (or rather misuse) of drugs. This is often as a result of improper use by patients or simply a lack of compliance to the drug regime. Even when a regime is followed, it may not necessarily be the ‘right’ one. According to Leslie Saxon, a cardiologist at the University of Southern California, the dosages of drugs used for conditions such as heart failure are determined after extensive clinical trials. However, the population sample on which the trials have been conducted, though broad, does not account for everyone. Monitoring drug dosage and its effects on a patient could allow for individualised drug therapy. Simply knowing whether a drug dose is excessive, insufficient, has adverse side effects or is simply ineffective for a particular patient could allow doctors to modify treatment for a better
POWER OF INFORMATION: Smart pills could soon know more data about you than your doctor does response. So how will intelligent pills assist with this? Proteus has devised a two component system called the Raisin system. The first part is a microchip about the size of a grain of sand the ‘ingestible event marker’ (IEM) - which is to be embedded within a pill and swallowed along with the patient’s normal medication. Once it comes into contact with acid in the
stomach, it is activated, and sends a high-frequency electrical current through the body, detected by the second part of the system: a “sensor” or receiving patch worn on the skin of the patient’s chest or abdomen. Besides data about internal body conditions like blood pH and blood glucose that the receiver logs from the electrical signal, it can also externally measure other physiological condi-
tions, such as the patient’s heart rate and breathing rate. Once recorded by the receiver, the data is transmitted to the patient’s mobile phone and can then be forwarded to a server monitored by health services. The UK equivalent of the product will contain a safe, soluble microchip embedded in a red sugar placebo pill, along with an adhesive skin-patch to be changed once a week and data sup-
FLIKR: GRUMPY-PUDDIN
Maithili Mehta takes a look at the new 'smart pills' that monitor your body and text the data to your mobile phone port. Proteus’s vice president of sensor development Ben Costello reckons that it is possible, in principle, to manufacture microchips in bulk for less than one pence per chip, despite the starting price for the technology being estimated at around £50 a month. In collaboration with Lloyds pharmacy, Proteus believe they can have the pill hitting the market as early as September. And here’s the glitch: currently, the Helius program operates outside of the National Health Service. This means that patients wanting to use the smart pill will need to pay for it out of their own pockets. This may be a limiting factor for the pill’s popularity. Another overlooked danger here is the possible privacy violation that it entails. A pill of such capacity is able to record information that could act like fingerprints; extremely useful for identification, but potentially hazardous in the wrong hands. Proteus Biomedical is confident that the microchip data uploaded from mobile phones to servers will not be intercepted. In fact, they stress that the whole point of such technology is to enable patients to “share” vital statistics with relatives, doctors and friends. Imagine waking up to a Facebook update about how well your aunt’s diabetes treatment is doing – technology pushed to its limits, isn’t it?
Travelling through time and space Alasdair Drennan explains recent events which have shaken the scientific community at Cern in Geneva ALMOST ALL understanding of physics is based around one assumption – nothing is able to travel faster than light in a vacuum. This has been the linchpin of physics for more than 100 years. Until the 17th century it was believed that light had no speed and travelled instantaneously. In 1704, Sir Isaac Newton suggested that it took light “seven or eight minutes” to get from the Sun to the Earth, remarkably close to the eight minutes, 19 seconds it actually takes. Finally in 1905, Einstein proposed his theory of special relativity on which much modern physics is based. It states that the maximum speed that anything can travel at is the speed of light and it is therefore a constant that has been used since. However, last September physicists at the Cern lab in Geneva were left baffled. They had apparently observed neutrinos travelling through rock from western Switzerland to a an enormous 1,800 tonne receiver buried 1.4 km under an Italian mountain faster than light could. It took the particles an inconceivably small 0.0024 seconds to
travel the 732km to the receiver, which was 0.00000006 seconds faster than expected. Although seemingly negligible, nobody considered such a result possible.
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Last September physicists at the Cern lab in Geneva were left baffled." Researchers on the Opera experiment were so baffled by the results that they published all of their research data and invited the public to scrutinise their findings to try to find an error. A stunned sense of disbelief rippled across the scientific community and even those that led the experiment seemed to have little faith in the results. Pasquale Migliozzi of the Italian National Institute of Nuclear Physics said that although they had done everything they could to ensure the accuracy of the experiment, “its potentially great impact on physics justifies great care and prudence. Therefore, Opera
will continue to investigate possible but yet still unknown systematic effects that could explain the observed anomaly.” A second, improved version of the experiment was carried out in November that delivered the same results. Scepticism was replaced with excitement and a mad scramble across the world began to attempt to challenge or confirm the remarkable results. Everyone’s favourite rockstarcome-physicist, Professor Brian Cox explained how groundbreaking the result would be if it was accurate. In a discussion on BBC Radio 6 Music, he said if no errors or explanations could be found, “we would require a complete re-writing of our understanding of the universe.” He excitedly continued, “if it’s confirmed then it will be the most important scientific discovery in the last 100 years.” The mainstream press took the results to mean that it was time to fire up the DeLorians as time travel was just round the corner. The special theory of relativity gives us the model that
causes will always come before effects, computer was discovered. It was realbut faster than light speed travel would ised that this loose connection would make time ‘multi directional’. introduce a 60-nanosecond margin of error – perfectly explaining the irregular results. All hope is not lost though and Tardis-style travel thankfully travel to Alpha Centauri through space suddenly may not be a distant vision confined to science fiction. An oscillator that seemed possible." was part of Opera’s particle was also found to be giving incorrect readings Not wishing to completely un- that, if calibrated correctly, may mean dermine the last 100 years of physics the particles travelled even faster than research and teaching, a number of was originally assumed. A new round theories were proposed which could ex- of testing is scheduled for May and sciplain the anomalous results. The most entists believe that they have perfected convincing, yet still slightly wacky, the experiment to produce much more was that the universe had a number of accurate results by using short pulsed different dimensions and ‘wormholes’ beams of neutrinos. would allow a particle to take a shortcut Whatever the outcome of May’s between two points in space. Instead experiments, interplanetary travel in of dampening the excitement over the blue police boxes is unfortunately undiscovery, Tardis-style travel through likely anytime soon, but the research space suddenly seemed possible. has shaken the scientific community. However, lofty aspirations of quick For over a century the speed of light trips to the edges of the universe came has been taken as the universe’s speed crashing back down to Earth last limit and last year’s research was an month when a loose fibre optic con- abrupt reminder that nothing should nection between a GPS receiver and a be taken as an absolute fact.
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Follow us on twitter @TheStudentPaper or on Facebook at facebook.com/TheStudentNewspaper tech.studentnewspaper@gmail.com
OLIVER NINNIS
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Flashes of brilliance but-pretty theme, there’s the Orisinal website, which includes Panda Run and Swordsman - both incredibly simplistic, but gorgeous. All the games on Orisinal are created by Ferry Halim, who refers to the website as his ‘playground’. However, the innovative timewaster wants something more than sweetness and light. So try out The Body, a side-scrolling flash that resembles a comic strip more than a game. Not only does the music compliment the tone, but the way it asks the player to interpret the story by themselves makes you stop and think. Working along the same aesthetic and narrative lines is One Chance, a game which you can only ever play once. The player takes the role of a lauded scientist, who discovers the day after curing cancer that his wonderdrug is actually deadly and will wipe out all life on Earth in seven days. The player is confronted with choices throughout the week (sleep with your secretary, spend time with your family, jump from a high-rise building - a usual week) and depending on those choices, determines the final outcome of the game. Both games offer minimal involvement and instead focus on the choices the player is confronted with. If your interest is peeked by these more thoughtful, intuitive games, then there are several brilliant flash creations to suit your needs. Every Day The Same Dream provides a medi-
KONGREGATE
FLASH GAMES have long occupied a lowly status in the gaming pantheon. They are to serious video games as the Northern Conference Football League is to the European Cup. But if you look a little closer, there are some pixelated gems amongst the virtual landfill and if you can be bothered to find them, your procrastination time might just get a whole lot more interesting. There are those that are inventive and gloriously stupid in equal measure. Don’t Shit Your Pants challenges the player to do something they have managed to do for most of their life already – not to poo themselves - but the player has to work out the text commands needed to rescue their dignity before the clock runs out. Weirder still is Spewer, a delightful platform game by Edmund McMillen, who’s previous work such famed titles as Super Meat Boy and Aether. Spewer requires the player to exercise their skill with the arrow key whilst vomiting strategically through a set of levels in a science lab. Moving away from the ridiculous, consider the 2D platform game William & Sly 2. The player takes control of a friendly fox searching for pages of William’s lost journal. The single level is beautifully animated, very mysterious and much of the enjoyment derived from the game comes just from exploring the physics and the geography. Staying with the simple-
OLIVER NINNIS
Sam Bradley shares some of his favourite experiences from the world of flash games
SO PRETTY...: Turns out Flash Games don't have to look terrible tation on the tedium and grey drone of modern society, daring the player to continue the drab existence of their office worker protagonist or rebel against the establishment. Elsewhere, there’s the poignant and pretty I wish I were the Moon, in which you compete for the heart’s desire of a girl in a rowing boat with a magical polaroid camera. Don’t Look Back is a flash-adaptation of the legend of Orpheus and Eurydice, asking the player to navigate the darkest pits of hell to save their lover. And last, but not least are Distance and Platform. Both are intriguing and
A phone-y debate
play with the addictive nature of flash games; pulling you in until the last moment. The former, about the intricacies and obstacles that can occur during a long-distance relationship, and the latter, a darkly humorous dig at the unfairness of life itself. Whilst most flash games are utter crap, it’s worth knowing that there are clever, thoughtful games being made with a format that isn’t as limited or childish as it looks. It might not be art, but these games will make you think. If that’s not a good way of wasting time, I don’t know what is.
Tom Hasler, Anna Feintuck and Eloise Kohler discuss which smartphone is the smartest phone WHAT BETTER argument can be brought against the iPhone than the fact that it is possible (in Japan, we believe) to buy a fake finger to use instead of one’s real digit on the touch screen? Said sausage-like appendage is disturbing for a number of reasons. Firstly, there is something slightly perverted about carrying something like that around. ‘It’s to touch my phone!’ sounds like an excuse for something a little darker, don’t you think? More, or at least equally worrying is what is implied by the perceived necessity of not actually touching the screen
yourself. Do phones actually carry that much dirt? And if so, do you really want to be looking at the (admittedly lovely) display through a smear of finger-grime? On a practical level, BlackBerries are also much easier to type on than iPhones. Even the daintiest hands struggle to hit the right bit of the screen on the latter device, not to mention the ridiculously small bubble word suggestions come up in when texting. There’s a very simple joy to be found in a QWERTY keyboard and although this hypothesis has not been rigorously
tested, it seems likely that texting and walking is less likely to result in injury due to excessive levels of required concentration on a BlackBerry than on an iPhone. We can certainly report 100 per cent success rate in not walking into lampposts whilst tapping away on our phones – a statistic that should not be taken lightly given that one of us once walked into a lamppost just, you know, walking along normally (so if it was likely to happen, it would definitely have happened to us by now). Finally, might we suggest that any instagram lovers switch to BlackBer-
ries immediately? The cameras are so dreadful on them that you get a lovely kind of vignetting with no effort whatsoever. Making the effort to put a filter on your photos seems rather like hard work in comparison. So, BlackBerries: they’re safe, charmingly lo-fi and they don’t require any sort of prosthetic appendage. What more could you ask for? And yes, we’re available to hire for slogan writing, by the way.
IF YOU’RE looking for a work phone, then by all means get a BlackBerry, otherwise, get an iPhone. It seems rather strange that BlackBerries have become so popular amongst students, especially considering the variety of affordable android phones on the market for a similar price. While BlackBerries are good for emails and texts, they are terrible at doing almost anything else. Browsing Facebook or the internet is a taxing affair when you have a screen the size of a small crisp and even
more so when you have to use some fiddly knob to scroll through the page. What’s worse, BlackBerries of every description can be easily recognised by their horrid, brick like appearance. A slab of grey plastic that serves as a symbol of the dull office and a life mispent in a career of managment consultancy. In comparison, the iPhone just looks cool; it looks like the future and by that I mean the awesome future, not the impeding apocalypse that is far more likely. The iPhone has been designed
to be versatile; it works great both as a phone and a hub for your social networking; it’s a portable media player; it’s a semi-decent digital camcorder and it’s great for browsing the web. What’s more, the touchscreen, motion sensor, gyroscope, GPS and camera allow the phone to adopt a plethora of new functionalities simply by downloading the appropriate app. While it’s certainly easy to be sociable and productive on a BlackBerry, only an iPhone can give you the vast toolbox for procrastination and distraction that is the app
store. Before games like Cut The Rope and Plants vs Zombies, I actually had to pay attention during lectures. But more importantly, every time you upgrade your phone, you get a three month honeymoon period, where your life is enhanced dramatically simply with the knowledge that you own an iPhone. The raw satisfaction of annoying your friends by showing your phone off at every opportunity is a rare high. You’ll never get that buzz out of a BlackBerry.
Anna & Eloise
Tom
WELL THE “Hamburger” Hepler crisis is over. A couple of weeks ago Jennifer Hepler, a lead writer on many of BioWare’s titles including Dragon Age and Star Wars: The Old Republic, got a twitter account. I know it doesn’t sound like a big deal… oh wait, it isn’t, or at least it shouldn’t be. Hold on, let’s wind back. In 2006, when Hepler gave an interview to an online magazine stating that she would like a fast forward button to skip through combat in the same way that you can with dialogue, especially if you didn’t have the time to play all the elements of an expansive role playing game like Dragon Age, but still wanted to experience the story and the dialogue. This interview, alongside a 4chan post saying that playing a gay Commander Shepard was more fun, showed up on Reddit. It called Hepler, “the cancer destroying BioWare.” This whipped up a string of negativity that occured when Hepler put herself into the public space. The bile that followed was obscene, calling her a cancer, a homosexual and worse. No one in the gaming industry, let alone a female writer for one of the best companies out there, should be attacked for their views on games. Oh wait; she wasn’t being attacked for her view on games, rather her apparent homosexuality and femininity. The characters involved didn’t even go as far as to tell her why she was wrong, but attached her to a progressive agenda because of her views on gameplay. Well, it stinks of a Reddit troll gone way too far, but the furore is over. Hepler deleted her twitter account. The funny thing is, I’m not sure Hepler’s comments are wrong or even a bad idea. Story over combat can work in many situations (who doesn’t prefer the exposition in Japanese RPGs to the combat systems?) and in games where the two are divided by an iron fence, such as in Mass Effect, it makes sense to be able to skip either side depending on your preference. This is the kind of debate we need to be having as gamers as the media is growing. If the internet remains like this, we are simply fulfilling every tired stereotype that we have been labelled with: internet weirdoes and idiots with strong opinions with no more sophistication than your average Youtube commenter. Thom Louis
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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14 Lifestyle The Bedroom Gardener
It’s March and ironically everything looks dead, or dying. The chilli plants should not be crispy; the cacti should not droop; the orchids should not be stubbornly dormant. There has been sunshine, I’ve seen it and I’ve been persistently watering, nurturing and feeding them. I have even played Classic FM to them – science says they like it. But alas, nothing has worked and it seems I may have to start from scratch. Given that it is a good time of year to try gardening, here are some gentle suggestions for things to grow yourself, if you feel so inclined. Salad This is really incredibly easy. Buy a packet of mixed salad leaf seeds (usually about £1) and scatter them lightly on soil – get fine compost if you can, as it’s easier for the seedlings to grow through that – in a wide, shallow tray with holes so that water can drain out. Put the tray on a larger surface, (like a bigger tray) to avoid having soil and water all over your window ledge. Then, cover the seeds with a little bit more soil, give them a good drink of water and leave them to do their thing. Water them at least every couple of days but never let them get soggy – if there’s liquid left over in the bottom tray an hour after watering your plants, it is too much. You may be lucky to get a crop of leaves within a fortnight if your seedlings are particularly keen. Basil I highly recommend Italian sweet basil– i'ts amazing and will make everything you put it with taste like summer. The most central purveyor of seeds I’ve found in Edinburgh has been the HomeBase by Dalkeith Road, but if you’re anti-conglomerate, you should be able to find details of independent online vendors. Simply follow the same instructions as the salad leaves above, but use little round pots instead of a tray, placing 5-10 well-spaced seeds in each pot. You may need to thin them out if they grow furiously by very gently removing them from the soil, untangling them if necessary, then replanting them. Basil needs sunshine and regular watering, so be sure to pop it on a windowsill where you won’t forget about it. Always keep the soil moist, but not soggy. Anna Feintuck
Just friends
Nina Seale considers whether relationships between men and women can ever stop being questioned Sexual tension is overrated. Countless friendships are ruined by a slowly building undercurrent of sexual curiosity, which will inevitably crash on a drunken night, burning the relationship to ashes. It seems incredibly rare for a girl and a boy to be best friends without this underlying tension and if you think about it, most ‘platonic’ relationships outside a friendship group are due to one party having feelings for the other. This poor individual is usually the one who suggests hanging out together, then hides their excitement when the other shrugs and agrees. Having been in this pathetic position one too many times, I can report that although the uninterested, unattainable guy always has the edge, it is very unhealthy to pine after a friend. Often, you have to sever all ties before your heartbreak is finalised by a rejection. It is particularly difficult to be friends with someone of the opposite sex who is in a relationship. You may get on with someone very well, but because they are spoken for romantically there is certain etiquette to your friendship. The rules are: No prolonged touching, no suggestive comments, no
meeting up alone unless it’s work-related in a public area, no complaining about the girlfriend/boyfriend and no getting drunk together without the girlfriend/boyfriend present. Unless you are deliberately breaking the rules (which is definitely frowned upon), it is a lot to consider, stopping many from attempting this awkward type of friendship. Your feelings for them may not even be romantic in any way, but somehow a normal friendship can spark too much jealousy for it to be worth the effort. Men and women also form quite different types of friendships. Stereotypically, close male friends will bond over common interests like sport, video games or films, whereas girls talk more about their feelings and relationships (friends or otherwise). The group dynamic of a bunch of lads is also very different to a gaggle of girls. Generally, girls are more insecure so tend not to bounce teasing comments off each other and there is often more hidden tension. On the other hand, a group of lads often avoid talking about feelings, making conflict more difficult to deal with. Platonic relationships between guys and girls can be difficult because
often they are used to different conventions within other friendships. There are lots of lines that a girl will not hesitate to cross with her girlfriends, but is very aware of when with a close male friend. Most of these are physical- being tactile with a single guy is a classic sign of flirting. What about giving romantic advice? For example, telling someone that their girlfriend or boyfriend is trouble before they are aware of it themselves can be misinterpreted as a jealous motive.
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Most 'platonic' relationships outside a friendship group are due to one party having feelings for the other." Yet, though rare, a guy and girl may find that they are emotionally close without the expected romantic longings or hidden feelings; an uncommon phenomenon many find too difficult to understand. I don’t talk about my best
guy friend any more than my close girlfriends, but somehow, simply because he is male, I find myself constantly defending our friendship. Too many people who have seen us together tell me that “you two will definitely end up together” because that’s how all the greatest romantic comedies finish. If we honestly live by Katherine Heigl’s romantic philosophies, we can be assured that no matter how unrealistically high our expectations are or how annoying our ‘playful quirks’ are, we will always find our perfect man. Rom-coms are fun to watch, but their messages are unrealistic. If you find that you are becoming close to someone of the opposite sex without any romantic interest, try to avoid labelling it. By being closer to my male best friend than anyone else, I could try to give advice, but truthfully, close boy-girl friendships are ‘outside-the-box’, meaning you have to keep them separate from everyone else’s expectations. Never let other people make you question or doubt your friendship because ultimately, only you will know what feels right for your friendship.
A moment on the lips
Catriona Sharp gives us a sophisticated take on baking in miniature and avoiding the cupcake craze
Over the last few years kitsch has definitely returned to the kitchen. The easiest way to channel the cutesy, sweet baking craze is with the now ubiquitous cupcake. Admittedly, I jumped on the cupcake bandwagon. I have several cupcake trays, countless packets of patterned paper baking cups and even a cupcake stand. However, I’ve recently felt the need to move on. Cupcakes aren’t quirky or cute anymore, they’re simply everywhere. The number of businesses that have opened that survive solely on the premise of producing cupcakes, constantly astonishes me. It’s time for grown-up baking. But there are some things holding me back. First of all, I don’t want to waste the equipment I’ve bought and secondly, one cannot deny that cupcakes are the perfect portion size. So if you are looking to make a bite-sized treat, I have put together a couple of recipes that change the cute to sophisticated. The first is a personal favourite. I have never been able to find a spring form tin that didn’t cost the earth and therefore haven’t been able to indulge my cheesecake addiction nearly as much as I would like. By making these mini raspberry baked cheesecakes in a muffin tin, I’ve overcome this problem. They also make a great dessert when coupled with cream and fresh raspberries. This recipe normally yields about 24 mini cheesecakes.
Raspberry Baked Cheesecakes
125g (4 ½ oz) crushed digestive biscuits 5tbsp melted unsalted butter 450g (1lb) ricotta cheese 450g (1lb) cream cheese, softened 2tsp vanilla essence 175g (6oz) icing sugar 3 eggs 100g (3 ½ oz) fresh raspberries 1. Preheat the oven to 160C (325F/Gas mark 3). Line your muffin tin with cupcake cases. 2. Put the crushed digestives in a medium bowl and stir in the butter. Spoon the mixture into the cupcake cases, pressing down firmly until compact. Then, chill them until they are set. 3. In a large bowl, beat the ricotta, then add the cream cheese, vanilla and icing sugar, mixing until smooth. Slowly add the eggs, mixing well as you go, then gently fold in the raspberries. Spoon the mixture into the cupcake cases. 4. Bake for 25 minutes. Remove from the oven and leave to cool before placing them in the fridge to chill until it is time to serve. They store for up to two days in the fridge. If your budget doesn’t stretch to ricotta and fresh raspberries when they’re out of season, these mini pineapple upside-down cupcakes are pretty cheap as they use basic store cupboard ingredients! This recipe normally yields about 24 servings.
MEGAN.CHROMIK
ASHA SUSAN
joanna lisiovec
New Beginnings
Pineapple Upside-Down Cupcakes 570g (1lb 4oz) pineapple chunks (you can use drained, tinned pineapple cut into small chunks) 125g (4 ½ oz) margarine, melted 225g (8oz) margarine, softened 150g (5oz) brown sugar 225g (8oz) caster sugar 225g (8oz) self-raising flour 4 eggs 1 tsp vanilla essence 1. Preheat the oven to 175C (350F/Gas mark 4). Grease two 12-cup muffin tins with butter and dust with a little flour, tapping out the excess. 2. In the bottom of each cup,
drizzle 1tbsp melted butter, 1tbsp pineapple and 1tbsp brown sugar. 3. Place all the other ingredients in a large bowl and beat with an electric whisk until smooth and pale, about 2 to 3 minutes. Spoon the batter on top of the pineapple mixture in each cup. 4. Bake for 25 minutes. Remove the tins from the oven and cool for 10 minutes. 5. Serve warm with double cream or vanilla ice cream. The cupcakes will keep in an airtight container for up to two days. So, forget the kitsch and cute and embrace the new, sophisticated minidesserts!
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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16 Crossword
Oliver ninnis
S
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S O OR
H George Square Kitty liekz chasin studentz acros teh meadows an I can rite horoscopez cuz I iz psychic kat an can read teh stars... PISCEZ IZ MAH FAVOURITE SIGN CUZ IT BE FISH AN I WANTS 2 EAT IT!!!
Mystic Messages Sally-Anne: contentious issue beginning with 'Q'. Don't eat any sausages.
Aries
You wake from a fitful dream to an overpowering urge to visit an art gallery. You pick one that boasts to have four Picassos. Upon arrival, however, you discover it only has one actual painting by Picasso alongside a cardboard cut-out of the man and a small sketch by Muriel Picasso Barnes, a toddler from Fife. The door to the suite also has the word ‘Picasso’ engraved on its interior surface.
Taurus
This week, you will find that Wednesday doesn’t happen. Don’t panic. As Tuesday comes to an end, ensure that you are in a safe place. After midnight, where Wednesday should be, to ensure that you don’t miss the day and that you remain in the Gregorian calendar system you will be required to go to the Nicolson Street Tesco and return Wednesday to the bagging area. You may be confused. In which case, you are unbelievably stupid.
Gemini
This week, the tide is high and I’m holdin’ on. I’m going to be your number one. I’m not the kind of girl, who writes horoscopes like that. Oh no. Oh oh oh.
Cancer
This weekend, you were the judge at the Meadows Marathon. You couldn’t decided who came first: the guy dressed as the chicken or his mate dressed as the egg? Mind blown.
Leo
This week, you try out a new fashion look. You make a pashmina for yourself out of kitchen tinfoil. You rock your new pewter-pashmina combo out to the Uni catwalk: George Square Library. Unfortunately, it's the day of the Meadows Marathon and everyone is wearing tin foil. MARE!
Virgo
This week, you venture into the library lift. It's crammed already, but it's still embarrasing when you step in and an icy machine voice giggles, “maximum weight capacity exceeded”.
Libra
After years of claiming that you are akin to Jesu Christi, casually turning boiling water and Nescafe instant into coffee, this week, you finally achieve the meteoric rise in popularity you feel you deserve. To cement your position as the Uni’s number one Son of God, you ditch your trench coat and boots and head over to Armstrong’s for some vintage Galilean sandals and a fetching beige frock. You look in the mirror and saw that it was good.
Scorpio
As a massive joke (about 3m by 4m), you lead all the swans from St Margaret’s Loch in Holyrood Park back to your flat. Your kitchen is now crowded with 70 swans, but it feels sort of right. You talk with the animals about your hopes and dreams, the state of the economy and Scottish independence. They honk encouragingly back.
Sagittarius
You make a curry for your friends: it is OUT OF THIS WORLD! Indeed, it’s so good that everyone at your elaborate ethnic dinner party assume that it was made from jar sauce. Damn you, Lloyd Grossman! Next time, drop a scabby plaster in to achieve that authentic ‘home made’ feel.
Capricorn
While browsing at a Newington bookstore, your psychic senses tingle as you sense something is amiss in your socioeconomic Venn diagram. Horrified, you realise you're in a socialist bookstore! Your conservative conscience swells up, herniating into your spinal cord, paralysing you.
Aquarius
You attend a Balkan Beat Box night dressed only in wooden clogs and tweed boxers and then vomit in disgust when you realise how mainstream you have become.
Pisces
Dual Crossword No. 9 BY PICUS
Trying to become 'Best High School Graduate, class of 08', you hunt down all of your ex-classmates and smother them in ectoplasm.
CRYPTIC CLUES
1
2
3
4
5
11
12
6
7
Across
1 New missile makes high-pitched noises, and we’re a bit close for comfort ! (6, 7) 8 She may be found in the cloister, going back and forth in green underwear (3) 9 Cash provider holds wild party, dropping Earl for gypsy (9) 10 Breaking bail I can provide an effective legal defence (5) 11 Passes down, from Henry & Son (5, 2) 13 European battles involve Timbuktu in the end, where lots are sold for less (and less) (5, 8) 15 One meets Turks scattered by the thousand in Siberian city (7) 17 Really over the top, in the Mogul Tradition (5) 19 Take time to study philosopher. Boring drudgery (9) 21 Flower girl of the month (3) 22 Bryophyte collectors ? Not this group ! (7, 6)
Down
8
9
10
13
15
19
14
16
17
20
21
22
1 By noon Jan and I cracked trained assassin (5) 2 Control the revelry - or go wild (3, 4) 3 Unfashionable and fashionable ? Come on, tell the truth ! (3, 4, 2) 4 Cavalier wife dons sash to defy half of Stirling (13) 5 England’s leader supports America - as is the custom (3) 6 Giant bothering short girl (5) 7 Headless spike carried by Special Forces in exotic clothes (7) 12 Madman linked to bizarre cult, and French veggie dish (3, 6) 13 Ne’er-do-well in dire straits tried heartless father (7) 14 Old Turk found in Old Testament, as a valet (7) 16 Little Eleanor heard the tolling of the bell (5) 18 Bass, out of tune, has unknown hidden depths (5) 20 Young man from Porthcawl at the heart of Dadaism (3)
CONCISE CLUES (same answers) Across 1 Close calls (6, 7) 8 Convent resident (3) 9 Gypsy (9) 10 Legal defence (5) 11 Practical (5-2) 13 Sales where prices always decrease (5, 8) 15 Siberian City (7) 17 Over the top, excessively (5) 19 Exhausting punishment (9) 21 Month (3) 22 60s group (7, 6)
Down 1 Japanese assassin (5) 2 Cause mayhem, go wild (3, 4) 3 Quit stalling ! (3, 4, 2) 4 Swaggering, adventurous (13) 5 Take drugs regularly (3) 6 Book of maps (5) 7 Malayan garments (7) 12 Vegetarian delicacy (3, 6) 13 A vagrant (7) 14 Cushioned seat : a Turk (7) 16 Funeral bells (5) 18 Bottomless pit (5) 20 Welshman (3)
The Chambers Dictionary (2008) is recommended
Solutions to Dual Crossword No. 8 Across 1 ALPHA 2 defs plus - contained in biblical Pharaoh Alpha Centauri → the brightest star (of the constellation Centaurus) 4 ESPOUSE Use preceded by (ESP + 0) 8 RIG 2 definitions plus rig (ht) 9 ACCOMPANY a + c-company 10 HANSARD [Dan’s ra(s)h]* 11 QUIRT quit round R 12 MUTATE mut (t) + ate (‘change’ → verb) 14 LATEST la (Fr) + test 17 DEMUR d for L of Lemur
18
Comments, questions, complaints etc can reach the compiler via the editors
18 YORKIST Kirsty* round 0 20 BETROTHAL be Trot Hal (‘pledge’ → noun) 22 ANN a + n + n 23 GEYSERS “geezers” 24 ERICA (I race)* ref Erica Roe (The Twickenham Streaker 1982) Down 1 ABRAHAM A (L) hambra - bra moves up 2 PAGAN aga for the ‘a’ of Pan 3 ALABASTER (a slate bar)* 4 ESCUDO (Duce so)* 5 POM pom (pom) 6 UNALIKE Una + like 7 EGYPT G-type*
11 QUADRILLE quad (square) + “rille” (reel) 13 TIMOTHY (I’m + OT) in thy 15 TITANIA (1 + tan) in ait (rev) 16 TYPHUS typ(e) + Hus (Jan H 1370 - 1415) 17 DEBUG debu (tante) + G 19 IRAQI (1 + q) rev after IRA 21 ORE Roe* (Erica again?) plus o + re (see ore2) * = anagram of the preceding material (rev) = reverse the preceding material “ …. “ the word in the clue and the word used (as material) for the answer are homophones
sure about LARGE until you solve an interlocking clue that confirms one of its letters - and that answer will have its own synonyms too. This is the big drawback of Definition crosswords. You often can’t put anything in the grid until you’ve solved several clues that interlock. In fact, you can’t be really certain until the last answer fits. So quite soon, mainly in England, people started to look for ways round this and (often by using tricks that already existed in earlier word-games)
they gradually developed a range of ways to provide clues that contained a definition, but also had that extra material. This was crucial because it enabled the solver to reach the same answer by a different route, thus providing an internal confirmation of the answer without having to solve any of the interlocking clues. Unfortunately, examples will have to wait ‘til next week. We’ll also look at how that “extra material” is used to make the different types of clue.
A bit about cryptic clues Last week we said that crossword clues come in two varieties, Definition and Cryptic, and that Cryptic clues always give you a definition of the answer word - plus “extra material”. Today, we’ll look at why that extra material is necessary and (in general terms) what it’s there for. We had a Definition clue. Big (5) : possible answer LARGE. However it might just as easily be GREAT (or even JUMBO - my dictionary has 16 five-letter synonyms for “big”). So you can’t be
rEVIEW rEVIEW
COMMISSION #20: darren nisbet
Darren Nisbet is a 4th year BA Drawing and Painting student. His work tends to reference popular cultural iconography and social taboos, in order to propose a commentary on his own social establishments. His work is usually autobiographical and based on events, images and objects that he interacts with on a daily basis. More recently, Nisbet has become interested in the idea of exploitation in cultural forms such as music videos, advertising and television programmes.
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
HOLLY JAMESON
20Culture 1
Winbreaking art
Maria Kheyfets enjoys Anna Barriball's manipulation of traditional techniques at the Fruitmarket Gallery
Adam House Run Ended
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here are a few clichés about us Italians. Some are good, others bad, but each one has a bit of truth in it. We are said to be cunning and mischievous, Machiavelli can tell us a thing or two about that. We are renowned for our perfectionism, attention to detail and our love for high-quality things. And this is portrayed in The Mandrake, a play put on by the Italian Society. The plot sees young Callimaco, a passionate philander, taking in simpleton Nicia with an elaborate plan to sleep with his beautiful and allegedly pure wife Lucrezia. All this with the help of crafty Ligurio, a corrupt priest and the girl’s depraved mother leads to a love intrigue seasoned with the critique of 16th-century debauched Florence. Octavian MacEwen’s performance of Callimaco was exquisite. He admiringly passed from Italian to Latin to Scottish and back again. Not only could I hardly spot a flaw in his command of the language, but was also so convinced by his motions and intonation that by the end I suspected some Florentine ancestry. The only performance clashing with the overall worthy cast was the first actor on stage
VATNSDAL
Bedlam Theatre Run Ended
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an Culleton’s Vatnsdal (no, I don’t know how to pronounce it either) doesn’t perpetrate the pointy helmet Viking stereotype, but it does contain a lot of angry men shouting, sword waving and more shouting and well, yeah, just basically lots of shouting.
serving as narrator: forgetting the lines, it happens. But delivering them eyes closed shows the stage is not your natural environment. Fortunately, his first appearance was also his last. Two scenes stood out due to their clever use of setting and space: the first when, behind a gold rimmed frame, two devoted nuns harassed the greedy and worldly Fra Timoteo with all sorts of theological puzzles. Framing the scene in gold conveyed the Church’s cupidity while displaying its spiritual incompetence. Secondly, the love scene between Callimaco and Lucrezia was subtly suggested by their setting up of a web. The string they attached across the stage forced them to move in a labyrinthine space, drawing them closer; it was, if not immediately comprehensible, delicately symbolic. Chapeau to the trio of musicians accompanying the chorus, the richness on the stage rendered the production polished and well thought-out. The pleasantness of the play made it quite upsetting to see it end so quickly. The script was drastically shortened, although cautiously enough not to leave the audience confused. The production aimed for more than amateur standard and succeeded; it lived up to the cliché which, for once, was a reason for pride. Paola Tamma When you turn up to a play where the audience consists of only around 15 people, it’s not an encouraging sign. It seems important to mention then that Vatnsdal’s cast do troop on with a considerable degree of energy, despite the significant lack of audience and this in itself is always commendable. Unfortunately, it becomes clear why there are so few bums on seats. Vatnsdal proposes to present an epic Viking tale of anger and revenge with poetry. It's a peculiar choice to have the cast speak
ANA Traverse Theatre 'Til 10th March
I
n their first collaboration, Clare Duffy and Pierre Yves Lemieux weave a thought-provoking tale of a cursed woman who, when faced with challenging decisions, splits herself to form a new person. As the world fills with different incarnations, Ana struggles to reconcile her many selves and gradually descends into madness. The audience is welcomed by Mike Majestic (Alain Goulem) – an instantly likeable cockney cheeky chappy who acts as ring master and narrator for the circus of Ana’s life. The acting from all the cast was superb, each seemlessly switching between multiple characters throughout the play, sometimes tragic, sometimes comic, sometimes young, sometimes old. A feat made all the more challenging when you consider they also had to switch between languages – half the play is in French, half in English. The combination of languages is used very well to provide a sense of location; scenes in France or Quebec are delivered in French, scenes in Scotland or America in English. A sort of commonality of problems faced by many women is illustrated through exploration of themes such
in riddle-like verse and one that doesn’t work. Unless you’re William Shakespeare, this is a tough thing to pull off, especially with a modern audience. The cast often struggle to articulate these overly-poetic lines- stumbling over them and rushing through them so fast that it becomes difficult to understand what they’re actually saying. At one point, a character seems to give a short soliloquy about... stew? Perhaps I’ve misinterpreted this or the stew is really a metaphor for some
his particular selection of Anna Barriball’s art encompasses the work she has produced over the last decade. From signature works on paper to major new projects, including a large windbreak sculpture and a wall drawing, Barriball consistently distorts the traditional limitations of various art disciplines. The majority of her materials are conventional, but her highly manipulative application of them results in a captivating amalgamation of distinct mediums. The highlight of the exhibition was ostensibly intended to be the recent massive sculpture “Untitled” (2011). However, I was chiefly captivated by some of Barriball’s smaller-scale works, particularly the photographs onto which she blew bubbles with an ink and deterrent mixture. This technique is not only used to revive the old photographs, but also to achieve distinct atmospheric effects by varying the size and density of the bubbles. A repeated pattern of small dark bubbles blown onto a photograph of a laughing mother and child creates an atmosphere of light-hearted joy; whereas a large, transparent bubble masking an older boy hints at the as maternity, infanticide and abandonment. The transition through time periods and countries highlights the notion that “Ana is a woman of all women”, that many women, irrespective of race or century, face similar struggles. The creative team has put together a visually gorgeous production. The set of six glass cabinets are manoeuvred around the stage, choreographed beautifully to form each scene in combination with video projection and brilliant lighting design. The costumes are also excellent, with a well thought-out colour palette and the incidental music is well-chosen and deployed effectively to
universally relatable sense of teenage insecurity. Another noteworthy artwork is the monochrome DVD projection “Draw (fireplace)” (2005). Here, a seemingly enlivened piece of tracing paper, which hangs over an empty grate, alternates between moulding itself to the grate as air is drawn in and then flattening out again as it is released. This creates a mystifying illusion of the fireplace drawing breath and is a clear example of Barriball’s amalgamation of forms; in “Draw”, the video becomes a type of sculpture. I found the installation to have a very unsettling quality. The notion of the home as a living entity is made even eerier with the loud, sinister ‘breathing’ of the fireplace. My initial stroll through the exhibition left me slightly perplexed, as I couldn't spot a consistent sense of artistic personality in Barriball’s work. Nevertheless, I have ultimately found that her art deserves an extra bit of pondering, as her consistent focus on the overlooked can not only generate a richly atmospheric visual experience, but also serve as a starting point for an innovative new look at artistic possibility.
create an atmosphere of a chaotic and bizarre carnival. The final 20 minutes of the play could do with some cutting. Every scene provides a new energy and emotion that builds on the narrative. However the final few are stretched out a little too long. Overall, though a superb production: experimental, but not incomprehensible, Ana has moments of tragedy, moments of French and Saunders-esque comedy and a beautiful design. It will leave you pondering which of the many aspects of your personality combine to create the sum of your life. Madeleine Ash
WHAT? YOU LIKE WHICH HAT?: Ana in performance profound truth that I haven’t quite grasped. There's also just too much shouting. Or, I should say, there’s too much shouting as a substitute for proper acting. Shouting the lines doesn’t make them any more resonant; there’s no real feeling behind the surface anger and it’s ultimately heartless. Perhaps Vatnsdal would have worked better as a comedy, but as it takes itself too seriously and is so overwrought it becomes farcical. The climactic fight scene that the play
builds up to is laughable and I find myself stifling giggles as the cast beat each other about with an absolutely serious intent. To call the play a total flop seems a bit harsh, but it’s difficult to find anything that redeems it. There’s nothing new or innovative here, it’s standard melodramatic territory. The saving grace of this production is the fact that it only lasted for 50 minutes. Rebecca Brown
TRISTAN BRAND
THE MANDRAKE
FRUITMARKET GALLERY
WHAT A TERRIBLY ARTY MESS: Barriball's work on display in the Fruitmarket Gallery
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Culture 19
STAR RATING Odin's eye Thor's hammer Heimdal's horn Loki's holly bush Baldr's brow
A dull tale is best for winter
ROYGBIV
This week's cultural spectrum. The cultural apocolypse trange to say in Britain in 2012, but austerity measures are not the biggest problem faced by Edinburgh’s own cultural ecology at the time of writing. Well-meaning but cack-handed legislation drafted two years ago, which would require even the most pop-up of pop-up arts spaces to apply for a Public Entertainment Licence before being allowed to do its thing, is set to come into place by the 1st of April. You may be aware of the campaign against these measures, but it bears repetition: this legislation, if implemented with full force (and this decision is entirely at the discretion of the City Council), will cripple Edinburgh’s independent arts scene. Even without the potential financial burden that could be placed on organisations and collectives already operating far from the comfort of financial viability, the weight of paperwork alone could be enough to force many of the scene’s current key players into an early cultural retirement. In spite of the dominant message that emits daily from the mainstream press, the truth is that the majority of individuals involved in producing culture do so out of love and not in pursuit of financial gain. Time is a precious commodity for many of these independent producers, who have to balance the call of their craft with the need to pay the bills by other means, not to mention that many of these artists, musicians and thespians are also family-men and -women (in further contradiction to the self-serving, boho types that find their way both into tabloid articles and university courses). These issues have never been clearer than at the public discussion which took place last Thursday at Leith’s Drill Hall, where Councillor Rob Munn was on hand to hear the grievances of an encouraging mass of Edinburgh’s creative types. It was ironic that it took the threat imposed by the proposed legislation to bring together what must have been the most stellar cultural gathering in Edinburgh’s recent history. Seemingly everyone who was anyone in the city’s cultural lifeblood was there and the air was close to audibly crackling with creative possibility. The task now is to persuade the City of Edinburgh Council that these people, and that energy, matter.
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Nina Seale is left cold by Edinburgh University Shakespeare Company's The Winter's Tale Pleasance Theatre Run Ended
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our hours of Shakespeare is a little too much, even for Bard-crazy literary nuts, and it would take a lot of zeal to keep your audience attentive for that long. Through little fault of their own, the Edinburgh University Shakespeare Company fell a tad short. The Winter’s Tale is wrapped up in the protagonist King Leontes’s jealousy and paranoia; the first half is a dark exploration of his tortured soul. There is a rising star in first year Frank Kerr, who played Leontes as a man in an alcohol-induced trance that cracked occasionally to reveal rash violence and fury burning within. Although his performance showed off his talent for delivering Shakespeare’s verse in the haunted role of the jealous king, the heavy nature of the first act coupled with the overuse of a noisy smoke machine and dramatic lighting tired the audience out long before the interval.
“
Through little fault of their own, the Edinburgh University Shakespeare Company fell a tad short." The second half was a great improvement, with sensational comic Billy Watt as the haphazard, gangly clown and Martin MacLennan as the sharp-tongued pick pocket, stealing our attention with their brilliant antagonistic chemistry. There was also the curious use of Leontes’s son, a young boy almost invisible
ROMANTIC CAMERA Scottish National Portrait Gallery 'til 3rd June
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t’s a wonderful thing that photo-taking and printing is so highly accessible today, yet with this comes a longing for the days when film was developed in a dark room and high quality wasn't defined by the camera’s mega pixels but the creativity of the shot. Among the over-commercialized commonality of SLRs now, either in the hands of a wandering tourist or an eager facebook-photo-uploading lover, lies a refreshing gateway to photography as an art form. Steering away from
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MY PRETTY BASKET?: Leontes holds Antigonus over his child
DAVID MONTEITH-HODGE, PHOTOGRAPHISE.COM
in the script but who is ever-present in this production. At first he seemed to be a device, perhaps to represent Leontes’s conscience in some way, but as the play progressed his sleepy presence in the corner made less and less sense. Nevertheless, Venice Van Someren’s portrayal of him as an intelligent, yet still adorable,
child was the only character who won the audience’s affection in the first half. His mother Hermione was as charming and dignified as other characters describe her, but lacked the warmth that would have truly gained our sympathy. The Winter’s Tale had some true gems in its cast, but not quite enough excite-
ment in the first half to keep the audience from checking their watches during the heavy scenes wrapped up in the melodrama of the royal court. The cheerful second act brightened the stage with some well choreographed comedy and put some relief into one of Shakespeare’s longest plays.
‘Warholic’ notions of art, this wonderfully constructed exhibition snatches back the human creativity from the now machine-clasped industry. Upon entering the beaming white room dedicated to romantic photography, I stood perplexed by the beauty of a seemingly utopian landscape. Only after reading the description did I realise the original photograph taken in 2007 had been edited in an obscure way; the photographer Michael Reisch stripped away any sign of human habitation: houses, sheep, roads or fences. Reisch had changed what was a familiar landscape into a teasing, imaginary terrain, almost primordial in dimension. While I stood glued in front of “Landscape 7/00” I was startled by a sudden bustling group of people filing
in. Only shortly afterwards did the man responsible for piecing together this vitalising collection (curator Duncan Forbes) enter. As he began to talk of what inspired his choices in the now space-less room, the crowd listened intently to the inspiring tale of revival and the strong bond between Scottish history and romantic photography. I couldn’t wait to peek around at the rest of the works; the photograph’s dating from 1843 sent me into a whirl of nostalgia for a world I had never lived in. Although placed in chronological order, whatever path you choose to take when cascading through this array of magnificent photography you will begin to consider the past and the present, igniting new meaning just as the artworks do. From elderly Scottish
women dressed as cows to musicians such as Bob Dylan as subjects, what echoes through the film is a conspicuous multi-layered message, questioning reality and current society, embracing an imagination to redeem us from the commonplace. Finding no fault apart from wishing there were more pieces, it’s an astounding world of Scottish history and innovation. My favourite piece payed homage to James Craig Annan’s pictorialist movement, while my favourite photograph was a satirical image by Ron O’Donnell in 1987 called “the great divide”, which effectively depicted the extent of classdivision in Britain.
Many better-qualified writers than I have already tackled this subject, and their collective efforts can be read at the campaign’s Facebook page, Stop Public Entertainment Licences in Edinburgh. If you already feel sufficiently motivated to sign the petition, go to http://chn. ge/zZxFPH
Mary Monica Kamel
THE ART DOCTOR with Anna
This week: Library crushes, flirty notes and lots of naked portraits
Right, let’s deal with you first. I think given that by the time this is
published it will have been more than a few days since you got the note, it’ll be clear that you’re not planning to go. A polite text saying that you’re very flattered but you have a girlfriend wouldn’t go amiss, though. As for your friend, I’m not sure it’s the best idea – I’ve known a few people who’ve gone on library note dates but they are all yet to find the love of their lives. But if she’s keen to do it, I’d recommend waiting until he goes for a break and then putting a note on his desk and running away. I’ve accidentally given you rather more practical advice than I usu-
Luke Healey
ally would but we do have space for a quick arty suggestion. Instead of sending a note, why not practise alluring glances? You’re going for a cross between Picasso’s 1941 "Portrait de Dora Maar" and Roger Hilton’s 1963 "Dancing Woman". And for how not to do it, have a quick look at "Otto Dix’s Mädchen auf Fell". Totally inappropriate in the library, I think. Got a problem? We can cure you! All problems will be treated confidentially. And ever so seriously. Email us at artdoctor.thestudent@gmail.com.
Look oot for... The ESCA is holding a massive variety night on the 7th of March. The acts include everything from singing to drumming. All proceeds are being donated to the British Heart Foundation Scotland.
BRONWEN BENDER
Dear Art Doctor, I know it’s just a symptom of this time of year with essay stress and so on, but everyone seems to be having library crush problems at the moment. I got a note the other day saying “Coffee?” and a phone number but I have a girlfriend so obviously won’t be going. How should I respond? On the other hand, one of my friends has been thinking about sending a note to a boy she’s sat opposite a few times. She wants to know whether that’s a good idea. Help us!
The Edinburgh University Savoy Opera Group are putting on their annual Gilbert and Sullivan. This year it is H.M.S Pinnafore, playing at Pleasance Theatre 'til Saturday.
Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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JOANNA LISOWIEC
1 Film
A midnight feast
Robert Dickie speaks to Matt Palmer about All Night Horror Madness at the Cameo
visit to the cinema is rarely conA sidered to be an event in itself. Most consist of going to see a single,
ALL NIGHT MOVIES: Don't fall asleep or Freddy will get you! extremity of the all-nighter has always been a big part of the attraction. “It’s obviously a crazy thing to do,” said Palmer, “staying up all night watching film after film after film. It’s an experience when you do it. You go into a little time portal. By the end of the night, the combination of having watched so much and being really tired mashes all the films into one big memory, and you have flashes of people’s arms being chopped off and different bits of movies popping into your head.”
FLICKR
specific film, hopefully arriving late enough to miss the adverts and getting out before the credits have finished rolling at the end. Modern films are as captivating as ever, but unless you live near a good independent cinema, it can be difficult to fall in love with the experience itself. During the 1980s and 1990s, cinematic events, including the all-nighter, were far more common. Matt Palmer, whose love for the cinema developed in that era, is working to reintroduce them in Edinburgh and is currently finalising the preparations for the fourth instalment of All Night Horror Madness at the Cameo. Recalling his first ever all-nighter, he said, “it was just one of the most exciting things I’d ever done.” The reputation of all night cinema has an element of notoriety, but Palmer assured me that even in the old days the events were usually comfortable. Those held at the infamous Scala cinema in London were notable exceptions that worked their way into the public consciousness. “The Scala was a law unto itself, a lot more rock and roll than any other cinema in the UK. There was pretty heavy drug use and it had that punk element – the walls were all painted black. I would absolutely love to do a really skuzzy, dangerous thing like that,” he joked, “but I’m not sure the Cameo would be up for it.” Even if it rarely reached the seedy heights often associated with it, the
The experience is enhanced by the atmosphere, which is starkly different to the relative isolation you normally find yourself in at the cinema. There is a real community feeling, a sense that everyone is in it together. Audiences are mixed, with older generations in it for the nostalgia alongside students making the most of their opportunity to stay up all night. Palmer noted that, “you always get the sense that people are making new friends and being really nice to each other.” Cult cinema is
perfectly suited to this kind of event; it always comes with a dedicated fan base and is “best watched late at night”. Given the popularity these events can still generate today, it is difficult to see why they died out in the first place. Palmer put it down to the “DVD explosion. A lot of films got rediscovered on DVD and there was a period when people watched a lot of films at home.” This trend might have been expected to continue, given the continual innovations in home cinema, but the nov-
HUNKY DORY
DIRECTED BY MCG
DIRECTED BY MARC EVANS
hen two best friends, who also W happen to be secret agents (Chris Pine and Tom Hardy) fall for the same
irector Marc Evans has created D an understated, nostalgic and enjoyable answer to the brash American
girl (Reese Witherspoon) and start to compete for her love, she has the terrible task of choosing between them, with hilarious consequences. Actually the movie is amazingly unfunny to the point of being plain boring. The characters constantly find themselves having to say such obvious and blatant things – spoon-feeding the audience in case we’re having trouble keeping up. Although, having noted that, there are some awkward cuts that are, at times, hard to follow. Predictably, the fight sequences are over-edited for ‘thrilling action’ ,while many scenes towards the beginning are far too long because of their incessant need to cram in backstory. It’s hard to feel much sympathy for our secret agents (who spend very little time doing their job) and while their efforts to spy on each other ought to be amusing, they’re just not. The main problem with the movie however is that for some reason, Witherspoon’s character Lauren decides
STUIDIO BRIEFING
THIS MEANS WAR
MENAGE A TROIS:Two guns and a bosom...inspired. that it’s okay to date two men at once and does so “for women everywhere”. This is no display of feminine empowerment – it’s dating two men at once. It should be possible to suspend reality enough to accept that, of course, such a story is not going to be true to life, but the deal is that it has to be funny. If the filmmakers won’t keep their side of the bargain neither will the audience. There are a few redeeming scenes which are usually aided by a catchy, rhythm-based soundtrack, but for the most part it’s tiresome and incredibly
cliched, not to mention shallow, contrived and not funny at all. The very fact that they include the old bothreaching-for-the-same-DVD-at-thesame-time scene and have a speeding vehicle heading for an unfinished flyover is just lazy filmmaking. The bad guy doesn’t even get a look in until the Edward-Jacob rivalry for fair lady is so well worn out that it comes as a bit of a relief to see stuff blowing up. Sarah Rundell Reviewed at Cineworld
hits Glee and High School Musical. The plot centres around Vivienne (Minnie Driver), an idealistic and unorthodox young teacher in a Welsh comprehensive in 1976. She is attempting to put on a musical school production of Shakespeare’s The Tempest that controversially combines the play with various David Bowie songs. It is a union that should fill anyone who even only vaguely cares for Shakespearean drama with immediate misgivings. “Ziggy Stardust” and Prospero? Caliban and “Life on Mars”? It just seems so unlikely. And yet, perhaps surprisingly, there is something in this union that seems to work – some common outlandish, alien feeling to both the original drama and the music. Sentimental nostalgia seeps through every layer of this film. Every scene is shot through warm, retro super 8-style filters. The opening involves the students listing their favourite bands: Bowie, The Ramones,
elty is showing signs of wearing off. There is a belief that big screen events can once again reel in the customers. However, putting them on takes a lot of hard work and publicity; “you can’t just stick an all-nighter on and expect people to come. It needs that extra push.” It was always going to be a struggle to convince cinemas to return to regular all-nighters. Having pitched the idea to several managers at the Cameo and Filmhouse, Palmer finally got the go-ahead in 2010. “I was really shocked,” he said, “I’d been used to five years of people saying that’s not going to work or that’s too risky. And then the first one completely sold out with a couple of days to spare, which really set us off.” Two years on, All Night Horror Madness is still going strongly, returning next Saturday with a line-up of five classic horror movies, many screened from unique 35mm prints. It can be hoped that its success will provide a firm incentive for other cinematic events to take off. Edinburgh is in a unique position with so many excellent cinemas in the city centre and Palmer agrees that “we are really spoiled here, with so much diverse programming.” But it is events like this that make cinemas exciting places to visit and ensure that the experience is remembered just as much as the films. All Night Horror Madness 4 takes place at the Cameo cinema from 11pm on Saturday 10th March. Student tickets cost £15.50. E.L.O. and so on. However, it never feels like too much and doesn’t get in the way of the story. The only possible exception being an act of arson that is glossed over and forgotten by the time the final credits are running. The music is sometimes an issue. Clearly you have to suspend your disbelief slightly regarding the students’ musical ability, but there are moments when their flawless renditions are too perfect. Sometimes you just want someone to hit a duff-note or a guitar string to snap unceremoniously. As it is, the rehearsal scenes are filled with endless angsty teenage strops and fights, without any suggestion that these sixth formers might actually find the music difficult. There is never a feeling that the actors will ever struggle to interrupt their emotional squabbling, by launching into some pitch-perfect orchestra-accompanied performance of “The Man Who Sold the World”. This is a film that is in no way exceptional. It is, however, surprisingly watchable and not too over-the-top. It streaks ahead of either of its two loud, American counterparts and you will certainly leave the cinema with a smile on your face. Jonathan Drake Reviewed at Cineworld
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Film 21
STAR RATING Animal House Old School 200 CigarettesRisky BusinessVan Wilder
he next in a run of ‘found footage’ T flicks, Project X tells the story of three high school boys who want to throw a game changing party and, of course, get laid. The preparations are extensive; they spread invitations via a radio broadcast, purchase those iconic red cups and acquire drugs from a madman.
“
The goings on of a wild party aren’t enough to make a film." The party starts off slow, then explodes until the break of dawn, yo. Booty shakin’ anthems provide the soundtrack for a series of social interactions that hold no profundity, only slimly veiling promiscuous foreplay. Oh yeah, there’s a flamethrower too. And there’s nothing wrong with that, except that the goings on of a wild party aren’t enough to make a film. Producer Todd Phillips’s The Hang-
Zack O'Leary Reviewed at Cineworld
GETTING LUCKY: But is the party more of a hit than the film?
CARANCHO DIRECTED BY PABLO TRAPERO
W
ith thousands of traffic accidents happening every year in Argentina, the compensation market is booming and not always legally. Hectòr Sosa is a carancho, or vulture, a lawyer who, thanks to his contacts, arrives on the scene of car crashes before paramedics and offers to represent the victims in legal cases. The legal practice, or rather criminal den, for which Sosa works, makes fat, illegal, profits off its customers’ insurance. Things get even murkier when a friend of Sosa dies in a staged accident gone wrong, and Lujàn, Sosa’s love interest and a paramedic, gets involved.
“
The squalid streets and buildings of the province of Buenos Aires, seem to lead the protagonists into addiction and crime." Focusing on these two characters, Carancho is a gritty thriller about despair and abjection. Besides being a good film within its genre, with the right amount of suspense and violence, Carancho is a compelling observation of characters that have fallen
into lives of addiction and misery. The very surroundings, the squalid streets and buildings of the province of Buenos Aires, seem to lead the protagonists into addiction and crime. Sosa and Lujàn are both broken, damaged goods, unable to connect with other human beings and incapable of fixing each other. Although they create a niche of domesticity and happiness for one another, the twisted paths of their lives are constantly looming over their fragile balance, threatening to destroy it. Released in the UK only two years after it was filmed, Carancho was nominated for both the 2010 Cannes Film Festival and the 83rd Academy Awards. Even if it did not win an award from either, it made a name for the people behind it, in particular for the talented Martina Gusmàn, both executive producer and lead actress. And the movie does, unquestionably, deserve recognition. The gritty, almost grainy, quality of the photography underlines its equally unpleasant content. Visually fascinating, with many hand-held shots and a rather homemade feel throughout, Carancho really is something different. For those into thrillers and mob stories, this is a gem not to miss. Its fast-paced storyline, nailing performances and intriguing soundtrack will keep the audience hooked and the Argentinean setting provides a realist touch that seems so rare in mainstream productions. Claudia Marinaro Reviewed at Filmhouse
Classic Cult light of the attention given reIThencently to Terrence Malick’s film Tree of Life (nominated for Best
MOVIEFANATIC
DIRECTED BY NIMA NOURIZADEH
over (2009) was successful because it has more than an elaborate lie-in for a story. It has characters that could be identified by more than just superficial labels, like jerk, spineless loser, kind of sad and notably heavy. Writer Michael Bacall, who adapted Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010) ensured the film had a degree of promise, but it seems he needs the charisma of a little-known but well-loved character in order to instill any sort of humanity into a story. Nima Nourizadeh’s direction is unoriginal, clearly suited more to his background in music videos than to feature films, and does not elevate Project X above its simple premise. With that in mind, it is impossible not to see the film as a long and elaborate music video. Nourizadeh does a reasonable job if you consider this to be business as usual, but this was supposed to be a movie, so his Kung Fu is no good here. Project X, which provides no rationale for a title better suited to a science fiction film, is Superbad (2007) meets Chronicle (2012) with all of the emotion drained out of it. Worst of all, it will give you a hangover.
4.BP
PROJECT X
FRIENDS REUNITED: What would Phoebe think?!
WANDERLUST DIRECTED BY DAVID WAIN eorge and Linda (Paul Rudd and G Jennifer Aniston) are a high-flying couple living in Manhattan; they
look like they have everything, except for a decent sex life. When Paul is made redundant, his brother in Atlanta offers him a job and they wind up in a whole other place. Elysium, a hippie and nudist commune is where George and Linda are forced to face some questions about where their lives are headed and just what they want from the journey. Wanderlust boasts a star-studded comedy cast. By all accounts it should be hilarious, but the problem is we’ve already seen this so many times before. Even this bunch of talented actors can’t bring the predictable plot and the tired jokes to life. Its overly zealous zaniness starts to grate after a while and when Linda climbs a tree, claiming that she feels like she can fly after being dosed up with hallucinogens, you feel like you’ve rolled your eyes so often you’re approaching insanity yourself.
MICHAEL DIRECTED BY MARKUS SCHLEINZER
T
here are some films that leave their mark on you long after the credits have rolled and you have stumbled out of the cinema, feeling more than slightly shaken.
“
Markus Schleinzer’s debut film is a chilling, unflinching view into the life of a paedophile and a child abductor - a man that society would like to call a monster." Michael, with its seemingly innocuous name, is one of those films. Markus Schleinzer’s debut film is a chilling, unflinching view into the life of a paedophile and a child abductor - a man that society would like to call a monster. Schleinzer’s feature is almost clinical in its treatment of the deeply disturbing subject matter and refusal to moralise. Instead, Schleinzer places us in the shoes of the protagonist as he forces himself upon 10-year-old Wolfgang, but also as he tries to nurse the sick child and take care of him. The mundane and the disturb-
This is the kind of comedy that claims to be laughing at capitalist, middle class values, but upholds them; instead opting to ridicule those who don’t subscribe to it - the people who live at the commune. Making jokes about a man who lives his waking life naked seems just a little too easy and you can’t help but wonder why Linda and George never questioned their lifestyle before. That it took some ‘kooks’ like Justin Theroux living in a forest for them to recognise their problems just doesn’t ring true. But of course, these things wouldn’t be running through the audience’s mind if they were preoccupied with laughing their arses off. Aniston and Rudd play their parts satisfactorily, but it’s clear that they lack chemistry. People who have watched The Object of my Affection (1998) will know this already and wonder why they have been paired up again 14 years later. Both are gifted with comedy (yes, that’s right, despite Aniston’s track record for choosing terrible scripts), but together there is just something not quite right. Wanderlust hits a few laughs but, ultimately, loses its way. Kirsty Wareing Reviewed at Cineworld ing are intricately interwoven as we watch Michael going about his daily life, from making dinner to buying toilet paper and preying upon a new little boy. Although the film hints at Michael’s problems with relationships, he is not your stereotypical villain with an obviously disturbed mind. He is a hard worker, goes skiing, goes for a pint with friends and sleeps with a barmaid who takes a fancy to him. He does not kill small animals; he does not have a dungeon full of torture instruments in his basement. Perhaps what is most terrifying is how Michael is pretty much your average bloke. In fact, there are moments of tenderness as well as he takes Wolfgang out to a petting zoo and tries to have a snowball fight with him in the basement in which he is held captive. Such moments are perhaps an effort to assume a normal ‘domestic’ life in the only way he knows how. As a result, we do not quite know what to make of Michael. It would be too simplistic to write him off as a monster. Rather, perhaps like everyone else, he simply wants to be loved as well. A truly magnificent debut, Michael challenges its audience, forcing us to think about the things we’d prefer to keep in the dark, quiet, hidden corners of our minds. Andrea Yew Reviewed at Cameo
Picture, Best Cinematography and Best Director at this year’s Oscars) it might be helpful to remind everyone why exactly Malick occupies such a prominent position in the canon of modern American film. Malick’s lofty stature in the film world can be confusing, especially given that he has directed only five films in his nearly 40-year career. But, as anyone who has seen The Tree of Life knows, Malick clearly lavishes extreme care upon his films. While some famous directors display their mania on the set – Hitchcock pestering female actresses and Kubrick berating Shelley Duvall to tears on the set of The Shining (1980) – Malick’s mania seems confined to the editing room. The postproduction of The Tree of Life lasted for three years and the original cut is rumoured to have been around six hours, which Malick wheedled down to a still monumental 139 minutes. That careful and controlled editing can be seen in Malick’s other work; each of his other four films provide a similarly slow-paced and emotional experience. Editing cuts are never abrupt or abrasive- even in scenes of extreme violence in Malick’s 1998 WWII film The Thin Red Line. There is a dreamlike attitude to everything that happens on screen. Some argue that this treatment ends up understating the horror of war, especially compared with a contemporary war film like Saving Private Ryan. Other critics make a similar case about Malick’s 1973 film Badlands, which follows Kit (Martin Sheen) and his girlfriend Holly (Sissy Spacek) on their killing spree across the Midwest. Kit kills seemingly without remorse. He and Holly live an essentially Edenic innocence during the film and neither character actually wrestles with the moral complexity of murder. But Malick’s films move beyond the scope of the plot, even the subject of the narrative, and confront much larger issues. The horror of war is at stake in The Thin Red Line. The narrative of Badlands contests the value of human life and the existence of a moral framework in society. Malick’s 2005 film The New World provides the audience with the age-old confrontation of ‘us’ versus ‘them'. Despite the critical success of The Thin Red Line and The Tree of Life, Malick’s towering achievement remains his 1978 film Days of Heaven. Running from the law in the wake of a murder, a young man takes his girlfriend and her younger sister out to the wheat fields of early 20th-century Texas during harvest time, to work for a wealthy farmer. The farmer falls in love with the girlfriend and complications, of course, ensue, but the film is truly memorable thanks to Malick’s splendid grasp of the landscape and the way he weaves natural imagery into the film’s plot. If you enjoyed that similar imagery in The Tree of Life, but could not warm to its barebones plot, then Days of Heaven, with its beautiful visuals and tragedy, might be the right Malick film for you. Taylor Coe
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Storm on the teacups? London-based funk-rock quartet Theme Park thoroughly impress Max Sanderson at Edinburgh's Electric Circus
JOB REQUIREMENTS: You've got to be skinny and fond of wearing black to be in Theme Park. Looks like the pole makes the grade. n air of expectation was apparent in A Electric Circus on Tuesday night as the crowd awaited the introduction of
the headliners to the stage with baited breath. This was shortly followed by a rapturous applause that announced the arrival of the somewhat lanky Londoners. The band, consisting of twin brothers Miles and Marcus Haughton and red headed Oscar Manthrope, were joined by Ric Hollingberry of the Penguillys on bass and Phil Jordan on drums. Comparisons of the North London group to Talking Heads have been nu-
merous and with tracks like the opener “A Mountain We Love”, it’s easy to see why. The combination of squelchy synths, tinny guitars and overpowering bass lines all undeniably point to new wave influences. This paired with the flawless live vocals of Marcus Haughton resulted in a powerful opening track that set the tone for the rest of their short set. The equally fulfilling “Milk” followed and it became apparent that the up until that point static crowd began to show signs of movement, as if infected by the pseudo-synchronised
Singles
bounce that was employed by the band. This was acknowledged with guitarist Miles awkwardly proclaiming, “Cool. What a fun crowd.” The five-piece, although together for less than a year, were surprisingly fluid and their respective instruments seemed to merge with ease to create a sound not too dissimilar from their released material. Nowhere was this more apparent than during their rendition of the slow moving, but ebullient “Jamaica”. The loudest cheer of the evening came for the penultimate “Wax”. The
insouciant and breezy account of young love is their best-known track with plays by the likes of Zane Lowe and it was executed to perfection. A definite highlight of the evening as the mutual gratification by band and crowd alike resulted in a delightful three and a half minutes. The set closing “2 Hours” followed and after a final applause, the boys stepped down from the stage and freely immersed themselves in the awaiting crowd. This perfectly encapsulated an aspect of their live show that many hyped young bands lack: a friendly and
approachable nature that ultimately leads to a more satisfying experience for all involved. The only criticism I had of the evening was the length of their set, a mere 20 minutes, which I later found out was due to the band’s limited back catalogue which currently consists of eight songs, seven of which were performed. Live performances, such as this one, coupled with their songwriting prowess, make it impossible to deny that Theme Park look to be bound for success.
KING CHARLES
CHIDDY BANG
THE BLACK KEYS
BIRDY
LoveBlood COOL DELTA
Ray Charles VIRGIN
Gold on the Ceiling NONESUCH RECORDS
1901 WARNER MUSIC
y poor neighbour! If she didn’t ing Charles certainly has a pasip-hop duo Chidera "Chidt is hard to criticise Birdy’s cover of M know The Black Keys...well, I Phoenix’s "1901" due to her age and K sion for big hair and big words, H dy" Anamege and Xaphoon she does now. And so does her since judging from past and future (“Bang”?) Jones have just whipped up inexperience as an artist, but her status releases,"love" seems to be his alltime favourite.
“
The lyrics don't even have to make sense all the time” "LoveBlood" is catchy and cheerful with an upbeat rhythm, and it is at the latest when the female background singers kick in that you will find yourself wanting to just sing along. The lyrics don’t even have to make sense all the time, because thinking about it, King Charles might actually be physically incapable of making a song which will not make you feel all happy and content inside. Plus, he can actually pull off the Victorian gentleman look and the moustache – plenty of reasons to look forward to his 2012 debut album. Ilinca Barsan
something great for breakfast- their latest album. In this track, Chiddy seems to have had some weird body-swap-freaky-Friday experience and now believes himself to be a dead musician, repeating "I’m Ray Charles" over and over again. The pair pay a 2012 homage to the legend with a tinkling piano riff, some foot-stomping bass and plenty of aaaah-oohs from a Motown choir. It’s soulful but with their characteristic old-school hip-hop bounce. As catchy as the song is, sometimes you have to question the lyrics ("too blind to see it") ("got my shades on / don’t know where they are"). Chiddy recently broke the world record for freestyle rapping (eight hours, in case you were wondering) which I guess is kind of impressive, but still, he’s not Ray Charles. Felicity Martin
young son. The fact that this sound is neither new nor original is entirely irrelevant. The riff is instantly recognizable from some other little ditty. But you’d be hard pushed to label it a rehash. They pull it off so well in their trademark style while still adding a touch of modernity. You can call it a homage to the blues/glam sound of the 70s. You can call it whatever you want. The truth remains, if you can resist tapping your feet or nodding your head then you are truly soulless. It has what you would expect: well-timed solos, great driving bluesy guitar, nice accompaniment from an electric organ and good ol’ harmonizing from Dan Auerbach and others for the chorus. This is to be enjoyed with the windows wide open. Expect neighbourly complaints. Fred Beckett
as recording artist necessitates she be reviewed at the same level as the artists whose work she covers. Phoenix’s song is dynamic and exciting, while Birdy’s rendition is languid and insipid and the 15 year-old lacks the vocal strength to carry it off. Indeed, a feeble attempt has been made to make the song her own my slowing the tempo and changing the melody slightly, yet this version only succeeds in giving the impression of a young girl covering her favourite band’s song in her bedroom. More frustrating is her obvious potential: "Without a Word", the only non-cover on her debut album, is more impressive vocally and creatively than the pedestrian covers she has so far released. Hopefully, we will be treated to more of her original work in the future, but for now Phoenix’s "1901" is the only version worth listening to. Rachel Wilson
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Music 23
STAR RATING The BossEditor at The StudentPR workerAdmin assistantGeneral dogsbody
Albums BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN Wrecking Ball COLUMBIA
T
he visceral power and politics of Wrecking Ball, the 17th studio album by Bruce Springsteen, has been widely reported. If 2007’s Magic was a call to arms and Working on a Dream (2009) a premature celebration of a new American century, this record is all at once the anger, distress, frustration and fatigue of a false dawn. The album opens with the question of whether “We Take Care of Our Own”. Ultimately, “Land of Hope and Dreams” answers this emphatically. If proof is needed, as an introduction Springsteen unleashes a passionate, present day variation of the iconic theme of Born in the U.S.A’s “Glory Days” signalling this cut as a defiant celebration of the invulnerability of hope. Unlike what one might expect from a record this livid, nostalgia is rare and subtle on Wrecking Ball, resulting in a magnification of its impact. Despite the raw fury of Wrecking Ball’s opening, there is a watershed for these emotions. A character that Springsteen has been chronicling for four decades finally find solace and closure in a collapsing world. This character has trailed Springsteen
Live
KATHLEEN EDWARDS Oran Mor, Glasgow Friday 24th February
L
ast November, Kathleen Edwards was faced with the difficult task of entertaining a room full of disaffected hipsters waiting to be wooed by her boyfriend’s band, Bon Iver. But she held her own with acerbic wit and heartfelt songs. However, Edwards really comes into her own when given an audience of her own and Oran Mor was the perfect venue for it last week. Proud of her Canadian heritage, Edwards’s opener was Vancouverite, Hannah Georgas. Although her drum machine and lyrics were less than inspired, her wavering vocals leant more emotion than most supporting acts can scrounge up.
SHEARWATER Animal Joy SUB POP
T
he band's seventh album proper and their first with Sub Pop, Animal Joy sees a change of direction for Shearwater. That’s not to say they’ve ditched the instruments in favour of setting off down some wild dark electronic path. Far from it. This is more Shearwater mark two. Scaling back (slightly) the expansive soundscapes of their previous self-penned Island Arc album trilogy, the trio have reigned in their ambition and established a more focused, intense sound. Album opener “Animal Life” is indicative of the band's progression. Building relentlessly from a lone bass beginning to a joyfully anthemic close, layers of repetitive instrumentation are slotted in throughout the threeand-a-half minutes, lifted by frontman
through the defining works of his career. We have seen him win his girl in “Rosalita (Come Out Tonight)” with Bueller-esque swagger predating even Ferris himself. We saw the couple escape the constraints of an inward urban life in Born to Run’s “Thunder Road”, only to encounter the first emotional strains of love in “Racing in the Street” (1978). We first heard the pained confessions of an unwanted adulthood in “The River” (1980) and his emotional and economic nadir in “Downbound Train”. He can be seen through the next 20 years of Springsteen’s catalogue and after what could have been his dénouement in “Reno”, his final redemption arrives in Wrecking Ball. 40 years after his first appearance, recession has returned and age is no longer a friend. The hypnosis of Tom Morello’s guitar solo in “This Depression” gives way to one of Springsteen’s magnificent codas. Defeated and weak, we hear his final admission: “I’ve been without love, but never forsaken / Now the morning sun, the morning sun is breaking.” Of course, this is just my interpretation and journey through Springsteen’s anthology. The wonderment of his catalogue is such that, for each listener, one can create his or her own saga. Perhaps in an earlier track, the voice saying of the bankers, “If I had me a gun, I’d find the bastards and shoot ‘em on sight” is the Joe Roberts of Nebraska’s “Highway Patrolman”
(1982). Like all great artists, Springsteen makes that our decision. The ability of Springsteen to project feature films onto vinyl, to capture light with a Florentine deftness and to tap into our most basic emotions that have remained vital to our very essence throughout our lives is unsurpassed. His canvas is forty years of relevancy and reinvention. The images of a broken America,
love and despair on the interstate and the boardwalk are all present and all add to the cinematic majesty of Springsteen’s music, but in many ways they are superficial flourishes. This is the reason why Springsteen’s presentday idolatry is found at its strongest not in the American heartland, but in Scandinavia, Ireland, Spain and Italy. Wrecking Ball only serves to reaffirm his mastery in capturing what makes
Edwards started off playing bars, so she’s cultivated a captivating stage presence that fits the cosy Oran Mor. However, she’s still clearly having a lot of fun. Her new album, Voyageur, was only released at the beginning of this year and so the songs are still very fresh. Edwards seemed quite close to her band, flirting with her guitarist Gord Tough and jokingly chiding him after he ripped a particularly good solo, “Someone isn’t jet-lagged!” However, they were evidently still getting used to playing some of these songs, as the guitar was occasionally overbearing and droned out Edward’s signature whiskycracked vocals. Yet many singer-songwriters have charisma, what makes Edwards unique is how much raw emotion she pours into her songs. Introducing “House Full of Empty Rooms”, Edwards lamented, “Sometimes, when you write songs you later wish you hadn’t, because you realise you’ve written down all your mistakes and now you have to tell peo-
ple about them.” This is understandable because Voyageur chronicles Edwards’s recent divorce. At times, you can hear her vocals wavering and see the tears in her eyes, but this passion can easily translate into anger. The gig’s tour de force was “Going to Hell”, a slow-burning track on the album that reaches an emotional fever pitch when accompanied by Tough’s guitar skills. The band is full of multi-instrumentalist with Edwards herself occasionally breaking out a fiddle to add a poignancy to her songs. They’re a band that knows what its doing, but still loves it and wants the audience to as well. Edwards has always straddled between genres, but with this gig she's achieved a balance. She writes lyrics and sings with the intimacy of the best country musicians, but her talent and energy is akin to the best rockers. What results is a show that the band is enjoying just as much as you are. Tess Malone
Albums
Jonathan Meiburg’s trademark high vocals. The rest of the album follows suit. “Breaking the Yearlings” is driven by harsh drums and swooping vocals, with a similar contrast being found in “Open Your Houses”. Understated yet powerful highlight “Insolence” softly rattles from an introspective reflection on personal character to a reassuring closing chant of “joy is real”, which seems equally directed to the listener and Meiburg himself.
to the unknown subject, “I held your name inside my mouth/through all the days out wandering”, revealing a hidden romantic intent behind the nature metaphors that otherwise dominate. “Breaking the Yearlings” uses imagery of heat, blazing skies and billowing black smoke to add further intensity to the harsh musical backdrop. Only when we reach album closer “Star of the Age” does it become clear the dynamic nature of each individual track has been mirrored by the album as a whole, with petty allusions to earthly phenomena being discarded for grander contemplations on the limits of the mind. Shearwater are a band who have forever been lurking in the background. No amount of critical acclaim and Coldplay support slots have managed to catapult them permanently into the alternative consciousness, but now armed with an album that succinctly shows the best of their abilities, Animal Joy could provide the break they deserve. Sarah Timmins
“
The trio have reigned in their ambition and established a more focused, intense sound." Whereas Meiburg’s lyrics have often been deemed quite opaque in the past, here we find him strikingly clear at last. In “Animal Life”, he declares
THE BOSS IS BACK: and he's celebrating by standing against a red wall...
CORROSION OF CONFORMITY
Corrosion of Conformity CANDLELIGHT
C
orrosion of Conformity’s new self-titled album is their first since 1985’s Animosity without Pepper Keenan (of Pantera and Down fame) on guitar and vocals. Instead they have reverted to their original three-piece line up with Woody Weatherman taking back his place as lead vocalist. Not only is this their first album without Keenan, but it’s also their first since 2005’s In the Arms of God, making it a comeback of sorts. Therefore it’s easy to see why new fans and old will be looking at it intently to see what they can come up with. The first thing that becomes obvious is not only have the band reverted back to their 1985 three piece days, but the sound they were pushing on Animosity has come back with it. Opening track “Psychic Vampire” comes straight in with a very doom metal style riff before
us human regardless of age, class, nationality or privilege. In this regard, Wrecking Ball shows us that Springsteen has risen through the ensemble of his contemporaries to the status of an unrivalled raconteur for modern times. The plaid-shirted sonic maestro. The supreme apothecary of emotions. Joe Pilkington cranking up the speed when the bass and drums hit. It’s a great opening to a good effort by the band. Second track “River of Stone” keeps up the initial assault with its blues metal sound and constant time changes: it feels like a track that any band could rely on as a corner stone in a live set. While the more punk rock sound of tracks like “Your Tomorrow” allows for the album to maintain its aggressive speed. Particularly with its placement, presumably on purpose, just after “El Lemento de las Cabras”, an instrumental track that is also by far the lightest sounding on the album. This album shows that Corrosion of Conformity can survive with or without Pepper Keenan, and in fact may well have found his departure as a way to return to their roots. It’s unlikely to rank highly among many end of year lists, yet you also can’t see anyone turning away from the band because of it. This is an album that will slip easily into the Corrosion of Conformity back catalogue and will provide a few more songs to any greatest hits set lists they may be looking to play on tour.
EXCUSE ME?: The boys look a little bemused
Stuart Iversen
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
Fish n' chips or pish n' chips?
INTERNET TELEVISION
Nina Bicket casts her critical net and reels in the BBC's latest documentary offering YU-GI-OH:THE ABRIDGED SERIES
BBC2 Wednesdays, 8pm
Youtube.com (2009)
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nternet television covers some of the most banal or bizarre topics imaginable, but often with absolutely hilarious results. The work of Youtube superstar Littlekuriboh gets millions upon millions of views each episode despite being banned twice from Youtube. The format of the show, that started out as a parody of the Japanese animated television series Yu-Gi-Oh, takes clips from the TV show and voices over the top of them. The voiceovers pass comment on the variety of subjects: the illogical storylines of the show being the starting point, but this is rapidly departed from often to political commentary, cultural references or childish jokes in funny voices. Within the framework of the programme, the ‘abridged’ versions of the character develop into dynamic characters in their own right with their own traits, perks and gimmicks – such as Duke Devlin’s sparking off the playing of "Sexyback" by Justin Timberlake whenever he appears. The ‘abridged’ characters also often occupy a bizarre space that can probably only be described as sitting on the fourth wall. They discuss their role in the actual Yu-Gi-Oh television series, often in a derogative manner, such as Mai Valentine’s lengthy eulogies about her role merely being to stand on screen and have large breasts. However. the characters don’t quite break the fourth wall that is thinly built around the abridged series, even though the show features the network that carries Yu-Gi-Oh and its USbased translators as main characters in its random and complicated excuse for a storyline. The end result of what is quite a mess of ideas being combined into a show that has a questionable level of organisation is incredibly entertaining. Often it’s childish and downright silly, with questionable voiceover talent and generally low production values – although the synchronisation between the voiceovers and visuals of the characters talking is impressive. That being said, the show exudes a certain geeky, internet-based charm – somewhat dispelling the argument that cyberspace is free of such ‘archaic’ sentiments. However, the artistic values of it is somewhat questionable and whilst it is one of the best of them, it's still merely voices echoed over a clip – which unfortunately make up about half of Youtube. Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged, however, is a good way to be cheered up by some generally immature and unoriginal humour presented in a quirky way. Though I wouldn’t recommend watching all of it, it has a high propensity to send you mad. Daniel Swain
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he Fisherman’s Apprentice is a very British show. Much like the country itself, it is picturesque and quaintly charming, if a bit dull and obsessed with tradition. The premise of the show is laid out in the needlessly dramatic opening voice-over accompanied by a pulse-pounding soundtrack in what appears to be a desperate attempt to make Cornwall edgy: Monty Halls, marine biologist, explorer, television personality, ex-Marine and conversationalist will spend eight months as an apprentice to a traditional Cornish fisherman learning the inside story of the fishing industry. This will, hopefully, provide him with the necessary knowledge to pursue a further investigation into how fishing works here and abroad. Rather than being an unbiased look at the industry, however, the show has a clear point to make about the decline of traditional fishermen and the danger and uncertainty of the future thanks to new fishing technology. Halls, despite the long list of television shows under his belt, ap-
OUR MAN IN... Channel 4 Thursdays, 10pm
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t’s quite clear to see the specific message in Our Man in Ibiza and Mallorca: don’t do drugs. You will either die, be arrested or probably end up committing murder. Almost every dramatic storyline in this show is based on drugs: a boy who disappears after taking them, a mysterious ‘pink pill’ that ‘swamps’ the island and sadly, a murderer who says his story began when he came here and got into drugs. The people shown don’t look like they’re having the time of their lives; instead, they appear more like children running around in a play pen, unaware of the adults who have to watch over them constantly. In the ‘behind-the-scenes’ action of the British consulate, we see the flip side of these ‘party holidays’, those who spend their livelihood trying to help Brits stay safe abroad. One striking aspect of the tragedies and disasters we see in the episode is how utterly avoidable they are. A new craze, ‘balconing’ or ‘balcony jumping’, has taken off, with people jumping off second or third story balconies into pools. It’s taken off with such gusto that even the Spanish papers are reporting such stories as ‘Its Raining Brits!’ And, of course, it leads to serious injuries and even deaths. You get a sense on the show that people on holiday tend to think they’re immortal and as we see throughout, they’re really not. There is some genuinely harrowing footage of a man in jail for murder, ex-
pears to be slightly uncomfortable when interacting with people in front of the camera and his interviews are marred by his irritating habit of mumbling “yeah, yeah” while the other person is speaking. However what he lacks in polish, he more than makes up for with personality, winning over the viewer with his Land Rover-driving, just-got-back-frommy-gap-year,khaki-shirt-unbuttoned-a-few-buttons-too-far, vaguely-ethnic-woven-bracelets-wearing, flip-flops-and-shorts-are-an-appropriate-outfit-for-a-fishing-boatright?, rough-and-ready charm. He’s sweet and eager, and although his profession as a television personality seems deeply at odds with an apprenticeship to a fisherman (even he admits this at one point), he is enthusiastic and non-judgemental. The biggest problem lies in the fact that although the show keeps pushing its point that the traditional fishing life is in danger: building up the fishermen to hero-status and warning that putting them out of a job would destroy not just their lives, but the entire community- it is very difficult to sympathise with them. Halls’ mentor, Nigel, a gruff whitebearded stereotype of a man with a pierced ear and gentle attitude with whom he develops a genuine chemisplaining briefly and succinctly, “I killed him. I didn’t mean to kill him…but it got out of hand and I killed him.” He explains that he came here for a job and got into drugs, which eventually led him to murder. Another shocking storyline comes from a boy who was tasered by the Spanish police and subsequently fell down a flight of stairs, leading to a blood clot. After initially refusing to make a complaint, accompanied by tense music, he eventually changes his mind. The show has an odd feel about it, which stems from the fact that it's actually televising reality. It’s not forced or cut together to make it more dramatic; it doesn’t require such doctoring. Our Man in Ibiza and Mallorca’s only assistance from production is the emotional music used to mirror the stories. Therefore, it isn’t a show with a storyline or a narrative imposed upon the audience. Due to this, however, it doesn’t have the great tension of similar reality abroad shows like Border Control. If there is one main subject that is given attention, it’s the enigma of the pink drugs or ‘pink devils’. There are references to the drug throughout; we are told they can induce paranioa and even lead to death. Honestly though, it's sometimes shocking, it’s hard to tell the point it’s trying to establish (apart from ‘don’t do drugs’). Is it showing us the hard work those in the British Consulate do everyday or just trying to put us off ever going to Ibiza? Well, it’s done both really, while also giving an alternative view into the way of life in Ibiza and Mallorca. Shoshana Kessler
try (leading to them referring to each other adorably as “Nige” and “Mont”) and the local net maker are about the only two friendly locals we see on the screen. The other fishermen, although introduced to us in a whirlwind montage of middle-aged, weatherworn, bearded men, are virtually identical;the only in-depth interaction we get with them is an interview with a man named Tonks who has clearly formed a dislike for Halls, describing him as “a celebrity who doesn’t want to get
his hands dirty.” “We don’t see a lot of newcomers round here,” he declares in an eerie Straw Dogs manner. Although by the end of the episode Halls appears to have won over the locals, it seems the show will need longer to convincingly make its point. At the moment, it seems to be an odd mix of nonthreatening Great British Bake Off-style reality show and serious documentary. At the first, it succeeds remarkably. As for the second, it remains to be seen.
FISH CHIC: High street fashion has really gone downhill.
CLEVERDICKS Sky Atlantic Wednesdays, 7pm
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elevision definitely needs another quiz-based entertainment show; there just simply aren’t enough of them. Thank the Lord then, for Cleverdicks, Sky Atlantic’s new quiz show fronted by ex-politician and apparent polymath Ann Widdecombe. The format of the show is hardly life-changing or innovative. Contestants answer questions (shocking stuff, huh?) with the help of up to five clues; the more clues you need to answer correctly the less points you are awarded. Guessing and getting the answer wrong receives no punishment, so much of the programme consists of the contestants desperately grasping at straws and saying the first things that come into their heads. This is entertaining for approximately five minutes. And then there is Widdecombe herself, whose foray into television hosting is frankly unexpected and a bit confusing. Perhaps her Strictly Come Dancing ‘success’ left her with a taste for the spotlight or maybe commentating on political developments and writing second-rate novels just doesn’t quite cut it anymore. At any rate, she gives the whole format her best shot, even engaging in cringeinducing banter with the contestants at the start of each show and incongruously screeching “Cleverdick!” after correct answers (just in case you had forgotten what you were watching… useful, really).
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THE FISHERMAN'S APPRENTICE
The thing about Widdecombe that makes the show often difficult to watch is the distinct air of tragedy that hangs around her, like a black shroud of vague, unaccountable sadness: something about her is just unutterably depressing. Maybe it’s her stilted attempts at light-hearted chat or the way she appears to have really made an effort to dress up for the show. At any rate, you have to constantly remind yourself that this is a women who’s strong political convictions (and, let’s face it, blatant homophobia and general intolerance) made her a formidable opponent in the House of Commons, otherwise you would just crumble under the crushing weight of it all. In an interview for Time Out promoting Cleverdicks, she stated her favourite joke was Christmas cracker favourite, "Where do generals keep their armies? Up their sleevies!" The innocence of this is heart-breaking. A quick visit to her website, meanwhile, reveals her favourite charity is a goat sanctuary called Buttercups. For God’s sake; it doesn’t get much more emotionally distressing than that. On the whole, Cleverdicks is fairly standard and unnecessary fare. If you enjoy quiz shows then this is another fairly competent, if a little forced, example of the genre. If you’re indifferent to the whole phenomenon then the show brings nothing really new to the table. Much of it was just a bit boring, really and as a whole Cleverdicks feels decidedly pointless (which is, incidentally, the name of a better example of the format, if you're interested.) Alistair Grant
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
TV 25
STAR RATING The Galactic Empire The British EmpireRoman Empire Empire Magazine Holy Roman Empire
Insufficient and Boer-ing
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Chris Massie finds a less than impressive colonial bounty in Paxman's Empire
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ecrying the wrongs of one’s ancestors is common in today’s selfrighteous world, especially among white people (white males, to be precise)eager to distance themselves from their bigoted forefathers. In the first episode of BBC’s new series, Empire, on the British Empire, Jeremy Paxman offers a version of the apologetic caricature of imperialism that has become popular in once-imperial nations. He disapprovingly surveys the ways in which the British subjugated the peoples of India and Egypt, in search of an answer to the question of “how such a small country got such a big head.” Paxman presents a narrative in which the British relied on spectacle to rule a nation far more populous than its own. The idea, Paxman says, was that “If you look like a ruler, the people will treat you like a ruler.”Notwithstanding the violent challenge to their supremacy known as the Indian Mutiny of 1857, which evoked a grotesque retaliation, the British were apparently convincing. According to Paxman, a combination of personal “arrogance” and ceremonial splendor impressed the Indians into submission. Paxman contrasts that garish form
not immediately and relentlessly resist British incursion. The unintentional consequence of this perfunctory approach is that imperialised peoples are depicted as helplessly meek and credulous in the face of cold-blooded British scheming. This is merely a contortion of past conceptions of that relationship—which cast Eastern societies as everything from racially inferior to inert and in need of shepherding into the modern world—with the primary negative judgment shifted to the British. Finally, for all his maligning of his own people, he provides little analysis of British imperialist motives. Using the British role in creating Jerusalem’s
volatile 20th Century as evidence, he ascribes their ambitions to an irresistible, but well-meaning urge to domineer other people’s affairs. Britain’s participation in recent wars, he argues, not mentioning that many were led by the US or Nato, is a sign that this inclination lingers. The problem, which Paxman says Britain is currently experiencing, of letting “go of who we once were” is a conundrum for all individuals and nations seeking to reinvent themselves. Its resolution demands historians and journalists better equipped than Paxman to expose the true natures of our old, lurking collective identities.
I'M PAXMAN: And this is an elephant not answering my questions.
No imperial entanglements
Daniel Swain analyses the less-than-prominent role that the British Empire plays on television
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very country has a horrible past. History is generally pretty gross. Its winners, anyone who survives, generally did a few grisly things to get there. Shame on a grand scale isn’t particularly attractive either, nor is it conducive to high viewing figures. So it isn’t really a surprise that we don’t see much of the British Empire in television.
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The empire upon which the sun once never set is now the empire that television briskly touches upon." Perhaps if television technology had developed itself earlier, maybe we’d have some triumphalist, imperial epics along the lines of The Man Who Would Be King and Zulu. But, belonging very much to the post-colonial world as it does, television encounters with empire are most obvious in and largely confined to occasional documentations of Britain’s vast empire that are simultaneously shameful and reverential of the vast size and scope of the colonial holdings. The presently airing Empire by Jeremy Paxman is symptomatic of this occasional reference to the empire, with its delicate but generally incomplete and lacking documentation of 200 years of British domination of the globe. Victoria’s Empire in 2008, hosted by Victo-
ria Wood, was a similar, but much more vacuous treatment, mainly focusing on the beautiful geographical setting of imperialism. 2007’s India with Sanjeev Bhaskar was given additional emotional depth and dealt well with the legacies of the controversial British policy of postcolonial partition in India, but once again failed to tackle the actual imperialism with any real effort. This may seem initially unsurprising; it's only logical that a country would hide the shame of its past and avoid devoting precious time in the media to it. This isn’t nefarious or malign – there is bold, liberal nobility in trying to free society from the chains of the past, especially if it’s one of questionable moral character. Indeed, Britain on the flip side does not have television programs, or events of any colour, celebrating old imperial conquests. However, such shyness isn’t consistent with how Britain as a society watches television. Television is increasingly, more than a link to the wider world or our collective consciousness, a link to the past. But the history we are linked to is rarely separate from the empire,the nostalgia British society feels for the inter-war years and the Victorian age, which drive viewers to Upstairs, Downstairs and Downton Abbey, cannot possibly be divorced from the sentiments that drove and motivated imperialism. These periods are dominated by Britain’s relationship with its colonies, yet fleeting references are all we see in mainstream television regarding imperialism. In addition, the warm feelings of paternalism that are rendered onto
the backdrop of class division are the same as the colonising official’s attitudes to the peoples of her many territories. Even television that takes place within a colonial setting or regarding a colonial encounter is reserved in its judgement of the British as a colonial power. For evidence of this, look no further than any British dramatization of Indian partition, which deals exclusively with poor Lord Louis Mountbatten, the rational- a nice British Royal who just can’t get the two silly Indians, Nehru and Jinnah to agree. In addition, multiple, recent series of Sharpe, which take place in India under the East India Company, characterise corrupt officials, mercenaries and maharajas, but often their victims are hapless British colonists and imperialists or well-meaning, swash-buckling adventurers or officers. No attempt is made to characterise the system that Richard Sharpe defends as inherently incorrect.
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This tendency to forget Britain's colonial legacies is also not consistent with the attitudes of other countries with a similar tarred past." The BBC’s recent, fabulous television series The Hour went someway in
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of rule to Sir Evelyn Baring’s clandestine machinations in Egypt. Denouncing the disdain with which Baring viewed Egyptians and sympathetically noting the resentment with which they responded, Paxman presents the British controller-general as a dominant figure, who ruled from “behind the throne”. In this manner, he claims, Britain invisibly managed the affairs of Egypt to suit its own interests. Although there is no doubt that pomp, trickery and, sometimes, brutality were tactics deployed to considerable effect in India and Egypt, Paxman’s simplistic explanations are unenlightening. This is partially because his investigative methods are uninspired. Many of his interviewees appear arbitrarily selected, with one suggesting that if he knew anything about the British occupation of India he would object to it. Others, such as an Indian soldier and the current Maharaja of Jaipur, provide little insight into Indian opinion of British rule. Not stimulated by Paxman’s inane questions (“Do you think the British being here was a good thing?”) or witless jokes (“Splendid beard,” he says of one of the Maharajas ancestors), their disaffected answers do nothing to advance his argument. The insufficiency of his account is further compounded by his failure to comprehensively explore either the individual interactions wherein Brits manipulated foreign leaders or the cultural foundations from which civilians did
SIXFEETUNDER HBO (2001-2005) Tvlinks.com
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criticising British attitudes towards interventionism in the context of the Suez Crisis, but shaped those more to the modern debate – though did attribute sufficient shame to the Eden government. This tendency to forget Britain’s colonial legacies is also not consistent with the attitudes of other countries with similar tarred past. Germany, despite having selective censorship laws on the subject, does not produce television on the Holocaust that fails to tackle German involvement. The US does not produce television about its treatment on Native or African Americans that is anything but condemning of past generations. Into the West – Steven Spielberg’s incredible series about American westward expansion displayed the US policies with regards to Native Americans with graphic, gritty realism, whilst Roots was brutal in its critique of the treatment of those Africans brought to North America and their descendants by generation after generation of white Europeans and their descendants. Britain’s difficulty in admitting its privileged position in the world, in terms of living standards and geopolitical power, stemming from over two centuries of oppressive activities, is crystallised in its television schedule. Whether existentially, as in Upstairs Downstairs – where it sounds like all the characters visit India like modern Brits visit Spain or ethically, as in Sharpe: The empire upon which the sun once never set is now the empire that television briskly touches upon.
ver wondered what it would be like to get killed by an industrial dough mixer? Six Feet Under shows this and many other bizarre deaths to open every episode of the drama about a dysfunctional family of undertakers. After the elusive patriarch of the family dies in a car accident, a family whose business is in death must face it themselves. What follows is a show that that uses magical realism and sardonic wit to deal with the hardest truth of life. SFU is the quintessential period piece of the early Noughties. It first aired in June 2001, presciently capturing the emotional strain and paranoia of living in a post-9/11 world. Expanding on the same themes that made creator Alan Ball’s American Beauty such an effective portrait of the failing nuclear family, SFU shows how that family can reinvent itself. Peter Krause, as the prodigal son Nate, struggles to conform to family life after growing up as an ambivalent Gen-Xer. His on and off affair with the sexually liberated Brenda is one of the most realistic relationships on TV, with Rachel Griffiths playing one of the best-written female characters of the decade. Lauren Ambrose’s feisty Claire, initially the angst-ridden teenager, morphs into a force of acerbic wit. Meanwhile, matriarch Ruth (Frances Conroy, a paradoxical mix of homemaker and free spirit) tries to hold on to the family, her only form of identity and mortician Rico (Freddy Rodriguez) tries to join the business. However, the Catholic, yet closeted David (Michael C. Hall, utterly transformed from his current incarnation as serial killer, Dexter) would seem out of place on today’s TV. Revolving around a funeral parlour, SFU naturally lends itself to soap opera antics. No controversial topic is left alone, from mental illness to foster care. The show retains credulity because of its strong guest stars who treat these issues with the gravity they deserve. James Cromwell (Ruth’s schizophrenic second husband) and Jeremy Sisto (Brenda’s bipolar brother Billy) are particularly strong. What saves the show from being pretentious is its self-deprecating humour. Characters frequently indulge daydreams where they speak to the recently deceased- sometimes poignantly (when David talks to a teenager killed for being gay) and sometimes hilariously (like Claire’s musical numbers). SFU is a wonderfully dark dramedy that shows us that even those who deal with death daily don’t know anything more than we do and it’s all the more endearing for it. Tess Malone
Drugs taint baseball once more
Injury Time
Sean Douglass expresses his anger at Ryan Braun's ban being overturned on a technicality LONG AFTER all the big money moves in free agency and as many teams preparing to go back for spring training, one of the final talking points of the MLB off-season was resolved on 23rd February when baseball’s newly crowned National League MVP, Ryan Braun, had his drugs ban for a positive elevated testosterone test overturned. Braun slugged the Milwaukee Brewers to the National League Championship Series with 33 home runs and a respectable batting average of 0.332, before his side ultimately lost to the World Series winning St. Louis Cardinals. That was all tainted in December though, when news leaked of a failed urine test for high testosterone level caused by a performanceenhancing drug. The penalty would have been a hefty 50 game ban for the start of the 2012 season. The test showed that Braun was certainly taking a prohibited substance – though this does not mean it was steroids – with the sample quoted as being “insanely high, the highest ever for anyone who has ever taken a test, twice the level of the highest test ever taken” for a baseball player and five times over the allowed testosterone limit. The test also confirmed that the testosterone was from an outside source and was synthetically made – there was no way his body could have produced this on its own. Okay, so the guy must be cheating then, right? Afterwards, it became public knowledge that the drug tester, Dino Laurenzi Jr., had to store the urine sample of Braun
in his home-office’s fridge for 44 hours before sending it away because all FedEx offices within 50 miles were closed. None of the three tamper-resistant seals on the containers were broken. Braun was adamant that he was not guilty and challenged the ruling in January. By late February, Braun became the first MLB player to successfully challenge a positive drug test result. The judging panel acknowledged that the positive test result was correct and Braun’s legal team did not challenge this or argue that the sample had been tampered with. Yet the arbitrators still overturned the ban. Why? Braun’s legal team made the case merely that protocol had not been followed on the treatment of the sample. Efforts to stop the use of performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs) in sport are as high as they have ever been, with laboratories continually trying to identify the latest type of designer drug engineered to beat the system. With so much money in PEDs, it’s only natural that someone will try and make big bucks off them, but as can seen from cycling, efforts to keep sport clean are making a genuine impact on the weeding out of drug cheats and this seemed to be another success catching yet another high-profile baseball star. In this case, the science was right, but that still did not affect the outcome. Braun still maintains that he did not dope, intentionally or unintentionally. Only he will know for certain what the circumstances were. Some US sports writers are claiming that the system worked and
(amazingly given the method of victory) Braun said that “the truth prevailed”. Is winning on a technicality really a victory for the system? Baseball is a sport synonymous with drug use allegations with some of the game’s biggest names – including Jose Canseco, David Ortiz, Alex Rodriguez and Mark McGwire – all having used steroids (and in Canseco and McGwire’s cases, actually being confirmed to have used them). For one of baseball's biggest stars to receive a positive test is bad,– Braun was tested a a mammoth 25 times last season, but for their subsequent ban to be overturned on a technicality is almost even worse. The 44-hour stop in Laurenzi Jr.’s fridge is what has led to Braun getting a positive drug test overturned even though the result of the test was acknowledged
TAKES A WRY LOOK AT THE WORLD OF SPORT
to be correct. The tester still claims he did what was considered protocol given the circumstances, saying he trusted his home to be more secure than a FedEx facility. Braun’s side made the argument that by holding the sample – even though FedEx could not have sent it off for two days – custody of the sample was not correctly handled. This alone was pretty much the basis of their appeal. A sport that has put so much effort into getting itself clean has now been dirtied again by the disconcerting way in which this case has been dealt with and while both sides can continue to argue the point, the fact is Braun has defied the odds and will likely be starting on Opening Day later this year. Meanwhile, sport’s fight against doping strikes out after one of the biggest names in American sport steals a victory on a technicality.
MVP STATUS: Braun tested positive for PEDs yet is free to play
King Kenny and the Beer Cup
STEVE PALUCH
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Sport 27
Niall Quinn leaves SAFC on a high
Phil Smith explains why Sunderland are on the up under new manager Martin O'Neill
THE CARLOS Tevez saga illustrated why so many are disillusioned with modern day football. Clubs and players seemed more disconnected from their traditional fan bases than ever before, attendances are sliding and no one really seems to know what to do about it. Of course, declining attendance most likely owes a lot to the rise of TV, although I must confess, why anyone would choose to listen to Andy Townsend or Gary Neville is completely beyond me. Nevertheless, there is a definite sense that clubs simply do not understand their fans, particularly with the rise of stunningly wealthy owners, both from abroad and the UK, who see their clubs ultimately as toys at their disposal. At Sunderland AFC, however, the work of now ex-chairman
Niall Quinn has completely belied this and the incredible rejuvenation of the club in recent times perhaps holds some lessons as to how clubs can reconnect to their fans. Coldplay, Red Hot Chilli Peppers and Bruce Springsteen will all perform at the Stadium of Light this summer, but it is difficult to imagine that even classic tracks such as “Yellow” and “Born in the USA” will get the stadium rocking in the same way the White Stripes “Seven Nation Army” has in recent times. Chants of “Oh oh oh oh oh Neill” to that iconic bass line are commonplace these days- an ode to the man who has reversed the fortunes of an ailing and seemingly disinterested team. Martin O’Neill’s philosophy can point to a very simple way of getting
QUINN'S LEGACY: SAFC fans sense their club is on the up
RONNIE MACDONALD
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Tuesday March 6 2012 studentnewspaper.org
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the fans back into the stadiums: he puts out a team that cares. The recent FA cup victory against Arsenal was a stunning display of commitment, as Wenger’s men were hassled and pressed for every ball. Whilst it may not be as attractive to the neutral to watch as Barcelona, it is intoxicating for the home fans to witness and instils a passion and pride in the stands not seen for many years. On the attack, his team play like lightning. Stephane Sessegnon has been a revelation (God's combination of Messi and Pele, according to the fans), whilst new winger James McClean has combined with the returning Frazier Campbell to create a side almost irresistible on the counter: pace, width and flair. This is football the British way and the fans just can’t get enough. Rather than the traditional revolving door approach most managers employ at a new club, O’Neill has put his trust in those frozen out or disappointing previous to his regime and they have repaid him and the fans handsomely. Above and beyond the charismatic Ulsterman, much of the fans' excitement rests in the tireless commitment and work of Quinn over the last six years. “No one is bigger than club” must be football’s most accurate cliché, yet Quinn proves it is possible for one man to completely epitomise an entire club’s philosophy, in much the same way Kenny Dalglish does for Liverpool. Due to an obvious love for the club and the city, (Quinn’s testimonial game was used to raise funds for a children’s ward at the local hospital) the fans are willing to trust
every decision the club makes, even when they are bitter pills to swallow, such as the sales of star talents Darren Bent and Jordan Henderson. Quinn’s devotion to the city and club is a key bridge between the fans and its American owner Ellis Short, exactly like Dalglish and John Henry.
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Niall Quinn has left behind a team that play with passion for the shirt and a boardroom which works tirelessly for the club, city and fans." Contrast this with Steve Kean, who rather than reassuring fans dubious of the clubs owners, actually serves to make relations worse. So whilst it is early days in Sunderland’s renaissance, they are perhaps leading the way with showing clubs how to maintain a strong link to their fans whilst still chasing the many glories of modern day football. Quinn may have now left the club, but his legacy is remarkably strong. He has left behind a team that plays with passion for the shirt and a boardroom that works tirelessly not just for the interests of the club, but the city and the fans that inhabit it. He will never be forgotten in Sunderland, and for the sake of all fans, his philosophy and work will hopefully be long remembered by football clubs everywhere.
Hear ye, hear ye, King Kenny is bringing the glory days back to Liverpool before our very eyes. And to think we laughed as he tried to disprove those who said he’d been out of the game too long by making self-deprecating half-jokes about being out of the game too long. “Maybe I’ve been out of the game too long, but it used to be a contact sport,” he said after Steven Gerrard was sent off for jumping on Michael Carrick’s legs in last year’s FA cup. “Maybe I’ve been out of the game too long, but we used to have a sense of humour,” he said- after hearing the FA didn’t much like Ryan Babel’s resulting Twitter Photoshop-ing of Howard Web in a Manchester United shirt. “Maybe I’ve been out of the game too long, but we used to be able to publicly support players found guilty of racially abusing a fellow professional by sporting Che Guevara-style images of him on custom-made t-shirts before a televised game without being universally ridiculed,” he probably said to somebody once. Well, who’s laughing now? Not those same sceptics, who sat openmouthed as Special K’s side swept aside championship stalwarts Cardiff City in the prestigious Beer Cup final with such verve and confidence that they could even afford to miss their first two shootout penalties. “This could be a real springboard for us,” roared the King. Maybe he had a point before after all? If you could go all the way back through the annals of time to the year 2000, before cars, bees or racism were invented and when King Kenny was last in managerial employment with Celtic, maybe you’d find a world in which two-footed lunging, questioning the integrity of referees and the repeated use of the word ‘negrito’ were all the rage. Or perhaps not. If the league cup is a springboard, it's dangerously placed at the side of a deceptively shallow pool. In the noughties alone, Leicester, Middlesbrough and Birmingham have soared from it, piking and tucking their way gloriously towards a bone-crunching relegation from which none have yet recovered. Juande Ramos took the plunge with Spurs, only to be sacked months later in favour of ‘Arry “‘ack you up with an ‘atchet if you call me a fackin’ wheeler-dealer” Redknapp. Internationally respected as the Beer Cup is, King Kenny’s best chance of attracting the players capable of bringing back the golden years to Anfield is to qualify for the Champions League – something he this season seems unable to manage despite the fact that Arsenal’s best players have been knicked or sold and Chelsea are managed by the Portuguese equivalent of David Brent. The King may yet inspire The Kop to future success. But we are not ready to bow down to His Majesty just yet. Davie Heaton
Sport
Tuesday March 6 2012
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One step forward, two steps back
Sean Douglass explains why Ryan Braun's overturned drugs ban is bad for baseball 27
Footballers march towards title
UNBEATEN: Chatterjee scores Edinburgh's second in another win Men's Football BUCS Mars Scottish 1A League Edinburgh 1st Glasgow 1st
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UNBEATEN EDINBURGH 1sts produced a solid display to defeat a hard-working Glasgow team in a characteristically cagey clash at Peffermill last Wednesday afternoon and retain their place at the top of the BUCS Mars Scot-
tish 1A League. With just two games remaining Edinburgh are in an incredibly strong position, with only Heriot-Watt able to prevent them from lifting the title. Edinburgh’s final game this season sees them face Heriot-Watt on Varsity Day with the potential for it to be a “winner-takes-all” clash. This fixture could well be the most important derby between the Edinburgh teams in years, but the league leaders will take confidence from their 100 per cent win record in the
CHARLES CUTTERIDGE
Undefeated Edinburgh beat Glasgow to set-up a potential league decider against Heriot-Watt, reports Chris Waugh league so far this season. Against Glasgow, it took just ten minutes for the home side to open the scoring. Chatterjee crossed the ball in from the right hand side and after a scramble in the box that may have included a Glasgow handball, Beacher eventually stabbed the ball home. The rest of the first half continued in a similar vein as Edinburgh controlled the play and kept the ball in Glasgow’s half. Vakalla and Main were at the heart of Edinburgh’s defence and they stifled the Glasgow midfield before they could give a killer pass. For all of Glasgow’s nice football and quick one-touch passes, they never really looked threatening and were unable to break through Edinburgh’s organised back line. Edinburgh’s Number 10, Scoular, a British Universities’ representative who toured with the team in Hong Kong last year, was the key orchestrator of the home side’s attacks and he expertly fed the ball through the middle of the Glasgow defence for Chatterjee to slot home at the second attempt. After half an hour Edinburgh led 2-0 and looked extremely comfortable. There were numerous chances for Edinburgh to extend their lead before the break, with Chatterjee, Beacher and
Twist all coming close, but they were unable to grab the third goal that their dominance so deserved. Glasgow’s only real opportunity in the first half came from a reverse ball from Rothnie which Tait in the Edinburgh goal misjudged; with the goalkeeper in no man’s land it was left to Edinburgh Captain Main to make a wonderful goal-line clearance. A change in formation from a fixed 43-3 to a more fluid 4-5-1 in defence and 4-3-3 in attack, coupled with the fact that the strong wind was now against them in the second half, saw Edinburgh struggle to control the game as they had done so efficiently in the first half. Aside from a couple of decent long range efforts from Rawlinson, Edinburgh’s best opportunity in the second half once again came through the impressive Chatterjee. In almost a carbon copy of their second goal, Scoular released the Edinburgh winger who took his shot first time on his left foot and was only denied by a good save from Blair in the Glasgow goal. Glasgow were still unable to break through the disciplined Edinburgh resistance in the second half. Tait did fluff a kick after 70 minutes but he recovered to gather at the second attempt and five minutes later he was
forced to make a brilliant save from Gallacher, the rebound for which was expertly cleared by Vakalla. This game, which finished 20, may not have been a classic but clashes between Edinburgh and Glasgow rarely are; they tend to be tight affairs, full of plenty of endeavour. If Edinburgh show the same commitment and discipline they displayed against Glasgow, then they could well extend their 100 per cent record to the entirety of the season and wrap up the Scottish title. Edinburgh Team: M Tait, S Scott-Woodhouse, C. Frain, D Main (c), O Vakalla, T Rawlinson, R Chatterjee, .D Ward, J Beacher, J Craigen, J Brownie. Subs: M Gray, C Moosavi Glasgow Team: M Blair, N Buchan, R Twist, G Ferguson (c), N Moffat, E Rothnie, C Leitch, A McLaughlin, R Gallacher, A Scoular, M Dommett Subs: A Ez-Mansi Scorers: Edinburgh:
Same old Scotland in the Six Nations
Charles Cutteridge assesses Scotland's Six Nations, so far they have lost all three games despite playing well tackles on Wesley Fofana let the French ahead. Pockets of poor concentration interspersed with great rugby. If only that were enough for the legions of faithful Scottish supporters to have something to shout about. If only Scotland could have a victory to celebrate. As it is you are likely to
hear a Scottish supporter boasting about how they beat England…four years ago. It's just so frustrating: they give you a glimmer of hope, but then break your heart inside the same ten minutes. There is fresh positivity surrounding Scottish rugby, however; players like Rennie, David Den-
SAME OLD STORY: Exasperation once more for all Scottish fans
ton and Stuart Hogg are all making noise. Noise is not yielding results though, it's just noise.
“
It's just so frustrating: Scotland give you a glimmer of hope, but then break your heart inside the same ten minutes."
CRAVENS
SUPPORTING SCOTTISH rugby is a bit like backing a Labrador at the dogs. Occasionally showing so much promise, you can’t fault the enthusiasm in face of the greyhounds, but at the back of your mind there is always that worry that he will stop halfway round the track to chase his tail or lick his balls. It doesn’t get more irritating as a supporter: played three, almost won three, but at the end of the day, lost three. The only game Scotland look like they'll win at the moment is against Italy; that’s if they send the poodle. Scotland's markbook so far reads: "Should have won against England." "Beaten but played well against Wales." "Should have won against France." Should have should have should have, if only the Labrador could stop licking his balls, he might just finish a race. The key moment against England was Ross Rennie’s failure to get the pass away to the overlap. Indiscipline and two yellow cards against Wales cost them the game. Three missed
The Labrador is barking, but it's dark and he doesn’t know who’s there. That noise needs to become a ‘W’ on paper if it's ever going to mean anything. Ireland is the next target, a bit of concentration and maybe we can do more. Just maybe. I hope so because let’s face it, a win against a poodle is worthless, nice to have, but nothing worth shouting about. Defeat against both would be humiliating to the highest degree, unsurprising and not to mention unfair but then, that’s Scottish gugby for you. If only the Labrador could stop licking his balls.
Overall BUCS Standings 6th Exeter 7th Edinburgh 8th Nottingham
1773 1686 1665
Edinburgh BUCS Points 1st Swimming 2nd Fencing 3rd Hockey 4th Squash 5th Lacrosse 5th Table Tennis
238 136 131 127 108 108
Wed 29th February Results Durham 1st 89 - 43 Edinburgh 1st (Men's Basketball) Edinburgh 2nd 66 - 64 Heriot-Watt 1st (Men's Basketball) Durham 1st 78 - 65 Edinburgh 1st (Women's Basketball) Edinburgh 2nd 0 - 2 Stirling 1st (Men's Hockey) Edinburgh 1st 5 - 0 Strathclyde 1st (Women's Hockey) Robert Gordon 1st 4 - 2 Edinburgh 1st (Women's Football) Edinburgh 1st 10 - 3 Glasgow 1st (Men's Lacrosse) Manchester 1st 11 - 7 Edinburgh 1st (Women's Lacrosse)