The Student 13/03/2012

Tuesday March 13 2012 | Week 8

Edinburgh's new comedy night CULTURE »

S I N C E 1887

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T H E U K ' S O LD E S T S T U D EN T N EW S PA P ER

S cott ish S t udent Ne wspaper of the Year 2010

Universities to recruit more from state schools

Kony 2012 reaches Edinburgh Students organise event in response to viral campaign

Katie Cunningham

Alice Cahill KONY 2012, the campaign aiming to raise awareness of Ugandan guerilla group leader Joseph Kony, has prompted Edinburgh students to take part in ‘Cover the Night’, an event which will see participants spend the night of 20 April distributing Kony 2012 fliers and posters in cities around the world.

Invisible Children, the group who are organising the campaign, released a half hour film on the alleged crimes of Kony’s 'Lord’s Resistance Army’ last Monday, urging people to help raise the campaign's profile.

The film’s director, Jason Russell, said that 'Cover the Night' will be an important step in the campaign.

He said, “[20 April] is the day when we will meet at sundown and blanket every street in every city until the sun comes up.

“The rest of the world will go to bed Friday night and wake up to hundreds

of thousands of posters demanding justice.”

The film has already been viewed over 70 million times on YouTube.

Kony is currently ranked number one on the International Criminal Court’s most wanted list, standing accused of overseeing the kidnapping of countless African children, brainwashing the boys into fighting for him and turning the girls into sex slaves.

His soldiers are believed to have slaughtered tens of thousands of people.

London School of Economics Professor Tim Allen has studied the Lord’s Resistance Army extensively.

Regarding Kony 2012 he said, “I think it has been fantastic how Invisible Children has been able to access that kind of younger population of potential activists.”

However, critics of the campaign have suggested that the problem has been oversimplified and that the wider political context needs to be taken into account.

Allen continued, “Even if Kony is removed tomorrow the problems are not going to go away.

“This is a part of the world in which hundreds of thousands, if not millions of people have been killed since the late 1990s in ongoing wars, and the Lord’s Resistance Army and Joseph Kony himself are responsible for very, very few of those deaths.”

Arthur Larok, Action Aid’s Director in Uganda, explained that their current priority is “rebuilding and securing lives for children” and that, “International campaigning that doesn’t support this agenda is not so useful at this point.”

Others have argued that the focus on Kony will divert millions of pounds of donations away from charities addressing issues in Africa such as malnutrition, access to clean water and the spread of AIDS, each of which has taken far more lives than Joseph Kony.

Invisible Children has also come under fire for what appears to be its

BORDER7

KONY 2012: A closer look at the campaign>> Comment P7 support for the Ugandan government and the Ugandan army, both of which have been accused of committing rape and looting.

Invisible Children responded by saying, “We do not defend any of the human rights abuses perpetrated…yet the only feasible way to stop Kony and protect the civilians he targets is to coordinate efforts with regional governments.”

Invisible Children itself has also been criticised for the way it spends its donations.

Last year, the organisation spent over $8.6m, only 32 per cent of which went to direct services in Uganda.

Just 48 hours after uploading the film, which calls for donations, the group had made $5m.

Responding to some of the criticisms, the Kony 2012 director has said, “This video is not the answer, it’s just the gateway into the conversation.

“We want you to keep investigating, we want you to read the history.”

ALMOST HALF of England’s leading universities want to increase their applications from state school pupils rather than those who were educated privately.

Universities including Cambridge, Durham, Exeter, University College London (UCL) and Warwick, want to implement long-term plans to increase their numbers by 2016.

Some, including UCL, want to raise their admissions by around ten per cent, while others additionally want to prevent students from independent schools from accessing scholarship programmes.

New Offa head Professor Les Ebdon referred to action which would be taken against universities not meeting targets as “nuclear” and that it would include steep fines.

Any institutions seeking to price their courses over £6,000 will have to create an Offa access plan; an outline of the targets and systems they are establishing to attract diverse students.

This includes targeting schools in poorer catchment areas, implementing summer classes and starting community outreach programmes.

However, there are already fears among independent school heads that it may be an attempt at “socially engineering” universities and that the change will encourage student applications to be downgraded “just because of the kind of school they come from.”

The Master of Magdalen College School in Oxford, Tim Hands, spoke against the change, stating that this was an attempt to “politically manipulate” results.

He said, “It’s no secret that top universities…don’t see why tertiary education should be forced to compensate for problems which government incompetence over secondary education has created in the first place.”

There are also concerns that the new system will ignore private school bursary students while assuming that all students from state schools are disadvantaged.

Wendy Piatt, Director General of the Russell Group, stated that the decision to target higher education facilities was a mistake.

Continued on page three »

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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What’s in this issue

»

NEWS »p1-4

GIVE THE DOG A LOAN p3

Ali Quaile looks at NUS Scotland's campaign to introduce postgraduate loans.

COMMENT »p7-9 PUTIN-ING A FINGER ON IT p 9

Lisa Katrina Lange considers how Vladimir Putin's presidential win reflects on the state of Russian democracy.

FEATURES »p10-12

SYRIA-OUSLY? p10

Varvara Bashkirova wonders why the international community is slow to react to Syria.

WE DON'T NEED NO OLD EDUCATION p12

Tess Malone compares and contrasts US vs. UK degree systems.

SCIENCE &ENVIRONMENT » p14-15

THE VOLDEMORT OF THE WORM WORLD p14 Katy Sheen burrows into the science of immortal worms.

TECHNOLOGY »p16

SHE WORE A RASPBERRY BERET p16

Kathryn MacPhail squeezes out the facts on Linux's Raspberry Pi computer.

CULTURE »p20-21

REAL ART WORK HAS CURVES p21 Troy Holmes weighs in on the website that slims down Renaissance babes to reflect on our thinsanity culture.

FILM »p22-23

EQUAL OPPORTUNITY OFFENDER? p22 Kirsty Wareing questions whether Hollywood really did leave racism in its past.

SPORT »p27-28

THE LIFE AQUATIC p28

Davie Heaton dives into the Scottish Aquatic Championships.

Library drought worsens

Library proposes a solution to multiple broken water fountains Alasdair Drennan

MORE THAN half of the drinking fountains in the library no longer work, leading to widespread complaints from students.

The fountains on the first and second floor have been broken for some time and the ground floor fountain was damaged this week. Fountains on other floors continue to function, but the library has acknowledged that

there is an ongoing problem.

The University’s Director of Library Services Sheila Cannell told The Student, “The water fountains in the Main Library are very heavily used, and, despite our best efforts, we have found it difficult to keep them all working.”

She went on to explain that plans are already in place to fix the problem, but no timescale for the changes has been offered.

“In consequence, we are proposing a change of system, to provide taps - from which students can fill their water bottles - and we are currently planning this transfer.”

Following a long campaign, free water was made available in the Library Cafe at the end of last year.

At the same time as the ongoing problems in the library, Edinburgh University Students’ Association Vice President for Services Philippa Faulkner has launched a campaign to expand the provision of drinking water throughout the University.

She is looking to make water available throughout the teaching spaces at the University.

She told The Student, “Free water should be readily available to students no matter where they study. But this is not just a welfare issue, it also one of sustainability.

“If we really are an environmentally responsible university we should be encouraging people to swap their bottled water for a good old fashioned glass of tap water.”

Search for ECA student to work for Tattoo

Stephen Maughan

EDINBURGH COLLEGE of Art (ECA) students have been invited to apply for the post of artist in residence for the internationally acclaimed Royal Edinburgh Military Tattoo.

The competition, now in its second year, is offering one successful student the chance to employ their artistic talents to promote and celebrate the Tattoo, which takes place throughout August on the esplanade of Edinburgh Castle.

It is also highly likely that the winner’s artwork will be shown at an exhibition later this year.

The post runs from May through to September of 2012 and the successful applicant will be offered £1,500 for their work.

David Allfrey MBE, the Tattoo chief executive and producer brigadier, launched the application process

last week that requires students to submit design concepts that would be appropriate to accompany the Tattoo’s performance.

A further requirement, introduced in order to encourage applicants to ‘think outside the box,’ is that submissions must be within or on a shoebox.

Brigadier Allfrey hailed the scheme as beneficial not only to the Military Tattoo and its performance, but to Scottish young people with an aptitude for art.

“This collaboration with the Edinburgh College of Art allows us to support the development of young and creative people in Scotland.

“The programme embraces the gamut of the artistic disciplines including painting, sculpture, drawing, graphic design, photography, illustration, jewellery and even fashion.

“We look forward to seeing the submissions from these talented students and awarding the prize.”

The ECA was equally enthusiastic issuing a statement affirming the possibilities the contest offers.

“This competition is a great opportunity for our students to present their ideas on an international stage.

“The Tattoo has a global audience and it is a privilege to inject the broad range of creative ability nurtured here at ECA into this already fabulous spectacle.”

Following in the footsteps of Leo du Feu, who graduated from ECA in 2006, the new holder of the artist in residence post will be expected to artistically aid the Tattoo production, which is scheduled to perform against the backdrop of Edinburgh Castle from 3-25 August.

The Tattoo is in entering its 62nd year and draws military talent and displays from across the world to sellout crowds throughout the Edinburgh Festival.

All the universities that responded to an investigation conducted by the Daily Telegraph said that they were wholly committed to “widening access”, but also expressed their disapproval of the education secretary’s plans.

Universities argued that a more productive solution would be to improve secondary education in underprivileged schools, as the failure of many students from deprived areas to gain the necessary grades to enter higher education is not down to the universities.

Universities Scotland, which represents all Scottish higher education establishments, said many poorer children “disengage” from their studies in their later years of secondary school before considering whether to apply to university.

In its report entitled 'Putting Learners at the Centre', Universities Scotland concluded, “Setting statutory targets for universities to widen access for this group therefore is unlikely to have a significant impact on participation.”

The University of Edinburgh raised the point that ‘over-recruiting’ students from less well–off backgrounds could potentially require

increased levels of taxpayer funding to support these students.

Other universities have argued that admitting students solely on the grounds of academic potential should be their top priority.

The University of St Andrews said, “The setting of quotas, rather than allowing institutions to select students on merit and potential, may not be at all helpful.

“Students should feel they have earned their place and not been given it due to political intervention.

“Universities should be free to choose the students that enhance their institution and the prospects of the individual.”

The University of Aberdeen responded similarly stating that its admissions policy was based “entirely on merit and on the basis of ability to achieve”.

The Scottish education secretary recently informed MSPs that the proposals were still under active consideration, stating, “There seems to be clear support for legislation to support current activity on access agreements being led by the Scottish Funding Council and that’s the route I will proceed.”

Universities criticise political involvement in admissions

Stephen Maughan

SCOTTISH UNIVERSITIES have criticised Scottish education secretary, Michael Russell, over his plan to increase university access to less well-off school-leavers.

Responding to an announcement made by the education secretary last year, the University of Edinburgh, the University of St Andrews and the University of Aberdeen have all declared their opposition to Russell’s proposal to introduce quotas for poor students that universities will be legally obliged to fill or face a fine.

Figures show that only 7.2 per cent of school-leavers in Scotland’s poorest areas gain the required grades to secure a university place, compared to the 50.4 per cent of students living in the wealthiest communities.

Under Russell’s plans, universities would not only have to consider an applicant’s academic achievements, but their background and family income, when allocating places.

This move is intended to benefit candidates from poorer backgrounds, which may damage middle-class pupils’ prospects even if they obtain superior grades.

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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NUS to campaign for the introduction of postgraduate loans in Scotland A motion passed at the NUS Scotland Conference held last week resolved to campaign for the introduction of postgraduate loans for students at Scottish universities.

This comes at a time when an increasing number of graduates are considering options for further study but are put off due to financial constraints.

With graduate unemployment at a 15 year high, many alumni are concerned they will be unable to stand out against the crowd with only an undergraduate degree.

The absence of a postgraduate loan system has meant many current students have had to rely on friends, family and career development loans from the bank to make their continued studying feasible.

It is predominately students from the poorest backgrounds who have been most affected by the complex financial system.

A key complaint of NUS Scotland was that a two-tier system within higher education has formed, comprised of those who can afford postgraduate study and those who cannot.

They argued that the key reason behind those who wish to enter postgraduate study not doing so, has nothing to do with ability, but instead concerns a lack of finances.

Hannah Standring Women should make up at least 40 per cent of the governing bodies of Scottish universities, a recent review of higher education governance in Scotland has recommended.

A panel of five, which included the former rector of the University of Edinburgh Iain Macwhirter and Robin Parker, the president of the National Union of Students (NUS) Scotland made the recommendations in a report published in January this year.

The panel itself included no female members.

The suggestions, if implemented, would require university governing bodies – such as the University of Edinburgh Court – to ensure that their membership is at least 40 per cent female, with at least two student representatives, one of whom should also be female.

The University of Edinburgh Court currently has a membership of 17 men and five women, with both the student representatives being male.

The report recommended the changes so that universities, “[reflect] the principles of equality and diversity more generally.”

Peter McColl, the new Rector of the University of Edinburgh, told The

IN

Postgraduate students account for 26 per cent of the university student population in Scotland, yet 75 per cent of postgraduates questioned said they were not receiving enough financial support to study.

It was also claimed that 55 per cent of postgraduates are, “Unhappy with the current system of provision of financial support ... compared to 26 per cent of students overall.”

“

[Loans] should be open to all students from Scotland and all students from the UK who have completed a ... degree in scotland."

NUS Scotland NUS Scotland have argued that access to education should be available to anyone who is academically able, not simply financially secure.

Taught and research masters fees at the University of Edinburgh for the 2012-13 academic year stand at £5,750 for home and EU students, whilst those from overseas can expect to pay between £13,050 and £30,850.

Fees for Masters of Philosophy and Doctorate Research programmes are between £11,450 and £27,000.

The Universities and Colleges Union (UCU) has highlighted the need for a greater number of postgraduates in Scotland to cater for its developing need for skills, a factor which would arguably be improved were a postgraduate loan system put in place.

The motion presented to the conference resolved to, “Campaign for a national postgraduate system in Scotland, which covers all up-front fees from

Calls to increase female representation in university governance Review says university courts should have more women representatives

Survey reveals students are chivalrous

holly jameson

Ali Quaile

Brief

Student that female representation is an area in which “universities can lead society.”

“The under-representation of women in the boardroom is a very serious broader problem.

“

As a world leading centre for academic excellence, the university is committed to embedding equality and diversity across all its work."

University of Edinburgh spokesperson “In a university where more than half of students are women it is appropriate that there are efforts made to ensure the court has significant representation from women.

“A quota of 40 per cent would be a step forward in ensuring that women are represented at the highest levels of the university.”

A University of Edinburgh spokesperson defended the university’s position on equality and diversity.

They said, “The university’s Equality and Diversity Strategy and Action Plan 2011-2012 makes equality and diversity guiding principles in all we do.

“As a world-leading centre of academic excellence, the university

is committed to embedding equality and diversity across all its work.”

Student opinion on the matter is divided.

Alice, a second year English undergraduate, told The Student that, “I think it’s important to have female representation, but they shouldn’t need a quota to do so”, while Joel, also a second year English student, suggested that quotas might be a “difficult but necessary” route to gender balance.

Hannah, a second year graphic design student, told The Student that it is, “easy to underestimate how difficult it is being the only female in a team of males” and that quotas are an important way to ensure female voices are heard.

For many students though, the issue seems to come down to who is right for the job, regardless of their sex.

Zak, a third year ecology student, said that there, “shouldn’t be a number that the university tries to reach for.

“The university court could be one hundred per cent female if they were right for the job.”

Gender equality across the University of Edinburgh’s academic staff shows a similar picture of gender imbalance; while the number of male and female staff in the lower income bands are fairly balanced, the percentage of females decreases as income increases.

Of those earning in the highest pay scale above £54,000, only 19.4 per cent are female.

institutions and which will provide at least the minimum income of £7,000 in living support for every postgraduate student.”

NUS Scotland added that the above loans system should be, “Open to all students from Scotland, and all students from the United Kingdom who have completed an undergraduate degree in Scotland.”

Private school pupils threatened by admissions changes

<<Continued from page one

She believes that it would be better to encourage state schools to raise their standards.

Although she admitted, “Even with good grades state school students are much less likely to apply to top universities than those at independent schools.

“We cannot offer places to those who do not apply.”

Piatt stressed the importance of opening the system without allowing it to become biased, continuing, “By encouraging more qualified students from state schools to apply to us through outreach and access schemes, our universities will have a wider pool of applicants from which to select the brightest and the best.”

“

Our universities will have a wider pool of applicants from which to select the brightest and the best."

Wendy Piatt, Director General of the Russell Group Defending their decision, both Cambridge and UCL have argued that they will make decisions based on application strength, and that this plan would only allow state school students the same opportunities as their privately educated counterparts.

A recent study conducted by YouGov has revealed a remarkable amount of student support for chivalry.

Over 80 per cent of students responding to the poll, conducted on behalf of Craigslist, approved of men offering to carry a woman’s bag, opening a door for a woman and letting a woman enter a room first.

A spokesperson for Craigslist said, “We were surprised by the level of student support for oldfashioned chivalry. Whatever happened to revolting students?”

The results follow International Women’s Day on Thursday 8 March.

The YouGov poll asked 2,075 British adults, including 106 full-time students, to give their thoughts on various acts of chivalry. The results were mostly high, though not quite as high as that of the general public.

ZTD

NUS to name and shame universities over living wage The National Union of Students (NUS) and Unison have launched a campaign where they intend to list all universities, colleges and students’ unions that do not pay the living wage as a minimum.

League tables will be created to highlight the institutions with the greatest gap between the lowest and highest paid staff.

NUS Vice-President, Dannie Grufferty, said, “There is clearly an inherent injustice in the average Vice-Chancellor getting paid more than 17-times more than a minimum wage employee on their campus.

“The difference between minimum wage and a living wage is the difference between constant money worries and being able to make ends meet. It also makes sense for employers who’ll see a rise in productivity and greater retention of staff.

AD

Teviot transformed for Potter fundraiser

On Sunday, the Teviot Debating Hall was decorated to look like Hogsmeade as part of a Harry Potter themed charity fundraiser.

A series of musical performances accompanied an offering of tea, chocolate frogs and pumpkin pasties.

Visitors to the event were able to change their “muggle money” to galleons at a Gringotts branch.

All the proceeds raised from the event will be donated to the Harry Potter Alliance Charity which is designed to raise money from Potter themed events.

The money is then shared among a number of different charities.

AD

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Edinburgh students drive to Mongolia Thurston Smalley

Hutchison told The Student: “We’re going through 13 countries, and that takes us through five deserts and over three mountain ranges as well.

“The reason we had to work out the countries was that we needed visas to go through, so to that extent we’ve agreed a route, but not roads, villages, days, or anything like that.”

Orkney added, “I think the real appeal of the rally is that it’s a real adventure. You can go travelling and things like that, but there’s a lot of uncertainty with what we’re doing.”

The Mongol Rally’s website strongly

cautions prospective teams of dangerous conditions, and warns, “Your chances of being seriously injured or dying as a result of taking part are high.”

The same paragraph lists “permanent disfigurement” and “serious disability” as possible outcomes.

The students, however, are confident in spite of the risks. “We believe we know what we’re getting ourselves into.

They do say you’re on your own, and I suppose that’s a proper way to approach such a long adventure,” Hutchison said.

The team also said that they intended to choose their route sensibly and “avoid

the war zones.”

Roberts explained, “Most teams used to go through Iran, but the Home Office is recommending against it this year. Some teams are still very keen on the idea, but not many. Most are going the other way, around the Caspian Sea.” Language barriers will accompany national barriers, but the team is confident they have a solution.

“I’ve heard a lot of teams saying that because your car gets really dusty it acts as quite a good map, so people will sort of stand around the back window and draw into the dust what you’re trying to

do or where you’re trying to go,” Roberts said, eliciting chuckles from his teammates.

Despite the obstacles, the trio is excited for the challenge to get underway.

“I wanted to do something off the beaten track, and I think this is about as far off the track as you can go, really,” Orkney said.

“None of us ever took a gap year after school. We came straight to university, we’ve been here for five years, and we’ve all got jobs starting in September. We’ve got this window to try and do something ridiculous,” Roberts added.

GRACE HO

THREE EDINBURGH students will take part in this summer’s Mongol Rally, a competition that challenges participants to drive low powered vehicles from London to Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia’s capital.

The fifth year engineering students - Ian Roberts, Andrew Hutchison and Ross Orkney - plan to compete in the rally with a Kia Rio. They will fund the journey themselves and all the money they raise will go to Lotus Children’s Centre Charitable Trust, a Mongolian charity.

The Edinburgh trio, whose team name is the ‘MeKhanical Engineers’ (a pun on the name of famous Mongol warlord Genghis Khan), will compete with about 450 other teams. Their exact route is unplanned, although they expect it to be about ten thousand miles long.

Number of graduates in low skill jobs increases ONS statistics reveal more graduates are taking on low skill jobs

Mathias Helseth and Nina Seale FIGURES FROM the Office for National Statistics (ONS) have revealed that more than one third of graduates go into low–skilled jobs on leaving university.

The scarcity of jobs has caused many students to go into non-graduate positions to avoid joining the growing number of unemployed young people.

14 per cent of recent graduates

were unemployed at the end of 2011 and unemployed non-graduates were at 28 per cent.

The report also explains that the numbers of graduates has increased by 42 per cent in the last ten years, increasing competition for highly skilled jobs.

Results from another survey, made

by High Fliers, which specialises in student and graduate employment research, indicate a 33 per cent increase in applications to graduate jobs.

This combined with the fact that employers put a great emphasis on previous work experience, limits graduates’ job opportunities.

But despite these distressing figures, the ONS survey also suggests that graduates are more likely to be employed than non–graduates, with 86 per cent of graduates in work com-

pared to 72.3 per cent of non–graduates at the end of 2011.

The study also shows that the average salaries for graduates, £15 an hour, are significantly higher than for non–graduates, £9 an hour.

Although graduates are paid more than non–graduates, there are noteworthy variations among the average wages for different degrees.

Graduates with degrees in medicine or dentistry receive the highest salaries, averaging at more than £21 per hour, whereas graduates with degrees in the arts and humanities are the lowest paid graduates, with an average of around £12 per hour.

Graduate employment prospects seem to be improving according to the study.

At the peak of the recession, 20.5 per cent of new graduates were un-

employed. At the end of last year the figure was 18.9 per cent.

“

A lack of quality jobs has forced more graduates into lower skilled jobs over the last decade."

Brendan Barber, TUC General Secretary Furthermore, the current figures are reassuringly lower than those measured during the recession in the 1990s.

When unemployment was at its highest in 1993, 26.9 per cent of graduates were unemployed.

Universities minister David Willetts stated that a degree is still “one of

the best pathways to a good job and a rewarding career” and emphasised that “[graduates’] prospects tend to pick up quicker during the recovery.”

In addition, Trades Union Congress General Secretary Brendan Barber still believes that degrees represent a good investment in employment, “The recession has hit the job prospects of recent graduates but they are still nearly 20 per cent more likely to be in work than people without degrees.

“A lack of quality jobs has forced more graduates into lower skilled jobs over the last decade.

“Raising the skills of UK workers must be accompanied with an industrial strategy focused on boosting high value industries such as manufacturing. Otherwise public investment in education and talents of graduates will continue to be wasted.”

Alasdair Drennan

IT’S THAT time of year again. At the end of this week the Edinburgh University Students’ Association (EUSA) election campaigns will begin.

Four sabbatical officers will be elected and they will spend next year working in paid, full-time positions.

There is the position of president and vice presidents of services, academic affairs and societies and activities.

In total, 90 positions are being contested.

Potential candidates for the EUSA election have until Thursday March 15 to submit their nomination forms, with the official campaigning period beginning at midday on Thursday and running until the end of the elections at noon on March 29. This is a shorter campaigning period than there has been in the past, which may be a welcome relief for some.

It will also mark the beginning of the poster campaign. Sabbatical candidates are given £90 to cover the cost

of printing posters and are permitted to use an additional £90 of their own money.

In addition to posters, candidates are allowed to make lecture announcements and go door knocking around student accommodation. Fortunately though, there are restrictions on when and where candidates can campaign.

They can go around Pollock Halls in the evenings of election week and on polling days before noon, but are not allowed to campaign in the JMCC or after 10pm.

The current sabbatical officers have created a number of videos explaining how to campaign that are worth a watch, even if you have no interest in the outcome of the elections (bit.ly/electionvideos).

Following a decision at the EUSA referendum earlier this semester, candidates will not be allowed to campaign in groups with shared marketing, logos or poster designs.

EUSA will hold a debate between the potential sabbatical officers in George Square lecture theatre on

Monday March 26.

Voting will take place online between midday on Tuesday March 27 and midday on Thursday March 29.

The election regulations prohibit potential candidates from announcing their candidacy publicly before the campaign period begins but a tentative list of candidates has been posted on the EUSA website (bit.ly/EUSAcandidates).

At the time of going to print, there were just two presidential candidates: Hugh Murdoch and James McAsh, but more may well emerge before nominations close. Alex Munyard, Andrew Burnie and Innes MacLeod are standing for vice president of academic affairs. The candidates for vice president of services are Josh Jones, Peter Thibault and Max Crema. Finally, the two candidates nominated for the position of vice president of societies and activities are Hazel Marzetti and Kate Harris.

The Student will have full coverage of the elections in the coming weeks.

ELECTED: Three of the current sabbs after their victory last year

EUSA

A guide to the EUSA elections: All you need to know

+ 5 :;( PU [OL LSLJ[PVUZ Nominations open Monday 5th March 5VTPUH[PVUZ VWLU and close 4VUKH` 4HYJO HUK JSVZL Thursday 15th of March ;O\YZKH` -LIY\HY` L\ZH LK HJ \R LSLJ[PVUZ

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6 Editorial

Editorial

Bogged down by essays? Tess gives you new and improved ways to procrastinate.

Join us!

The Student is always looking for budding reporters, reviewers, illustrators and photographers to join our team. We're also hunting for recruits for our marketing and events teams.

Track us down: » In person: Meetings every Tuesday in Teviot Dining Hall at 1.15pm. Socials: Tuesdays in The Counting House at 8.30pm.

Email: editors@studentnewspaper.org Facebook: tinyurl.com/StudentFacebook Twitter: twitter.com/TheStudentPaper Tumblr: thestudentpaper.tumblr.com A quick history lesson...

The Student was launched by Scottish novelist and poet Robert Louis Stevenson in 1887 as an independent voice for Edinburgh's literati. It is Britain's oldest student newspaper and is an independent publication, reaching more than 10,000 University of Edinburgh students every week.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Lord Kitchener, David Lloyd George and Winston Churchill are a few of the famous people who have been associated with the paper. In the early 1970s, Gordon Brown worked as a news editor and diary columnist, working alongside Robin Cook who at the time was in charge of film and concert reviews.

ALIQUAILE

No experience necessary!

1.

Build a castle out of all of your short-loan books to ensure none of your crazed classmates can steal them back from you.

2.

Take a page out of Julie Powell’s cookbook and try and cook all of Julia Child’s recipes in Mastering the Art of French Cooking. But unlike Powell, who set the goal for a year, give yourself the extra challenge of doing it during your reading week.

3. Re-enact the Jaffa Cake eclipse ad, but reconstruct the entire solar system in the process with Milky Ways and Galaxies.

4.

Recall every book on course list during the middle of the night.

5.

Buy the Walkers variety pack of crisps and eat them on the newly refurbished fourth floor. Make sure to chew with your mouth open.

6.

Attempt to start a romance with a Starbucks barista just to get free coffee for the week. Expect a marriage proposal in latte art by the end of the week.

7.

Try to see the panda.

8.

Create a lights show with the library blinds for joggers on the Meadows.

9.

Write love notes to your deskmate and send them on stacks scavenger hunt. Have your first date in the Library Cafe. The pesto chicken panini is quite nice.

11. Listen to all of the voicemails your parents leave you.

12. Don’t just clean your flat, renovate it! Create a skylight even though you live on the second floor.

13. Start studying in the Library Bar (it has the word library in it, right?). Swap tea for Tennent’s.

14. Pets relieve stress. Try to kidnap the George Square cat.

15. Film a horror movie in the New College Library stacks.

16. Read The Student.

The Student attempts to find water fountains in the library

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Editors Tess Malone/Ali Quaile

News Sam Bradley/Alasdair Drennan/Lewis MacDonald/Leo Michelmore Comment Daniel Kraemer/Joel Sharples/Daniel Swain Features Nina Bicket/Cameron Taylor/Alice McGurran Lifestyle Lilidh Kendrick/Marissa Trew Science & Environment Zoe Blah/Rebecca Chan/Nina Seale Tech Tom Hasler Horoscopes Max Johnson/Guy Rughani/Ben Scally Crosswords John Wakely Culture Troy Holmes/Thom Louis/Michael Mackenzie Music Joshua Angrave/Anna Feintuck/Tom KinneyFilm Robert Dickie/Kirsty WareingTV Alistair Grant/Leo Michelmore Commission Kathryn Lloyd Sport Davie Heaton/Chris Waugh

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Head copy editor Melissa Geere Copy editors /Monika Antonova/Sophia Cosby/John Hewitt Jones/ Vicky Knapp/Katy Sheen Head of marketing Matt McDonald

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Student Newspaper, 60 Pleasance, Edinburgh EH8 9TJ. Tel: 0131 650 9189. The Student lists links to third party websites, but does not endorse them or guarantee their authenticity or accuracy. © Student Newspaper Society. All rights reserved. No section in whole or part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system or transmited in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical photocopying, recording or otherwise without prior permission of the publisher. The Student is published by the Student Newspaper Society, 60 Pleasance, Edinburgh EH8 9TJ. Distributed by Lothian Couriers, 3 John Muir Place, Dunbar EH42 1GD. Tel: 01368 860115. Printed by Cumbrian Newsprint (part of the CN Group), Carlisle Print Centre, Newspaper House, Dalston Road, Cumbria CA2 5UA, on Monday March 12 2012. Tel: 01228 612600. Registered as a newspaper at the Post Office.

10. Watch a season of 24 in a day.

Repeat for all seven seasons.

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Comment 7

Do your research KONY 2012 exploded into the cybersphere on Wednesday 7 March. Facebook feeds were clogged with shared videos, comments and inspirational quotes. Yet it was closely hounded by a hail of criticism that questioned the accuracy, relevance and intentions of the Kony 2012 video.

If you have been living under a rock for the last week and somehow this viral campaign slipped under your radar, Kony 2012 is the name of the non-profit organisation Invisible Children’s (IC) latest campaign, which was launched with a half-hour video on Youtube that got over 50 million views in three days. It triumphs as the most successful documentary of its kind, revealing the horrors brought about by Kony’s Lord’s Resistance Army (LRA) in kidnapping children for sex slavery and child armies whilst intermittently comparing these young African victims to a blond, Caucasian toddler. But the most powerful part of the video is the overwhelmingly positive message- that you can actually make a difference.

But can you? With great success comes tremendous criticism and the flurry of action and talk about Joseph Kony and Kony 2012’s mission has stirred up severe censure. This has only furthered the foremost aim of Kony 2012’s purpose: to spread awareness of Kony’s war crimes in Uganda.

But now we all know about Joseph Kony, or at least what the nine year old footage in the Kony 2012 video showed us, what are we meant to do? IC urges us, in a charismatically persuasive way, to

donate to their charity to fund military intervention that will lead to the arrest of Joseph Kony. But I agree with one of IC’s most popular critics, sociologist and blogger Grant Oyston, when he advises Kony 2012 supporters to do their research before grabbing their cheque books. What exactly is the donated money going to?

Most of it goes to the awareness campaign that had your eyes tearing up in the first place. As a registered non-profit organisation, all IC’s expenses are audited and published online for anyone to see and 46.63 per cent of their expenses went to filming, fundraising, merchandise and awareness programs (excluding the 16.24 per cent that went to IC management). If you believe that awareness should be their first priority then, by all means, donate all you wish. But the most worrying part of the Kony 2012 campaign is their desire for military intervention: too much of IC donations go towards lobbying the US government to aid the search for Kony or directly to the Ugandan army. I can see how IC may believe that violence is the only way to capture Kony, but hasn’t history shown that concerned westerners blundering into conflict is not the best idea?

Make sure to research the actual conflict in Uganda too. Ugandans are already in uproar over Kony 2012’s campaign.

Their first concern about the video is that it misleadingly claims Kony is still in Uganda, when actually, he left in 2006 with the LRA to the jungles of neighbouring countries (he is now rumoured to be in the Congo or Central African Republic). The coverage should have

THE HUNT FOR KONY: Invisible Children have been criticised for over-simplifying the conflict followed Kony’s recent damage into the West of Africa and Kony 2012 fails to tell its viewers what can go wrong with chasing him with heavy military gunfire.

In 2008, the US supported the Ugandan-led air strikes and ground attacks on LRA camps in Congo. The LRA figureheads were tipped off and slipped into the dense bush, leaving the grown up army of kidnapped children to die in the battle, retaliating later with a killing spree that left thousands dead.

Ugandan blogger Rosebell Kagumire criticises the IC filmmakers of simplifying an incredibly complex war comprised

Cruel capping

of millions of stories that is a lot bigger than one man and will take more than his capture to solve.

Other concerns brought to light by Ugandan writers have been the possibility of fame making Kony stronger, pushing him into the offence and scaring him into using his army to accomplish more horrifying deeds to ward off the US. It is your decision whether or not you should donate to Invisible Children or help spread awareness of Kony 2012 by sharing videos or at Edinburgh’s Cover the Night event. Watch the video, if you haven’t already, but remember to find out

FLICKR

Nina Seale urges us to read around the highly complex subject before getting out our cheque books for Kony 2012

what you are donating to before typing in your credit card details - do you want your money to help the rehabilitation of child soldiers? Help restore peace in Uganda? That is not what your money is going towards, so look it up and decide whether you want to support the military action (with its possibly counterproductive side effects) and whether funding the awareness campaign is going to make the difference Kony 2012 is hoping for. The Kony 2012 video is a marvellous piece of touching film making, but it is also emotionally manipulative - do not let Jacob and Gavin blind you to the facts.

Yasmin Morgan-Griffiths attacks the government’s misguided plans for child benefit reforms ON 21ST March, child benefits will become subject to harsh government spending cuts in an attempt to reduce the budget deficit by around £2.4 billion.

There is widespread agreement amongst MPs that the system currently in place is “unfair”, with Nick Clegg declaring that “people with the broadest shoulders have to bear the biggest burden.” Evidently, any system which has poorer taxpayers forking out to support wealthier families is in need of revision, but the boundaries between individual cases are not as clear cut as the government has suggested.

The intended changes presently face vehement opposition by backbenchers, who have pointed out the many flaws in the proposed measures as they currently stand.

If the changes come into place, higher rate taxpayers who earn more than £42,735 will no longer have the right to receive child benefits. The immense and fairly obvious oversight to this legislation is that it puts single parents at a major

disadvantage; single parent families with a sole income of £43,000 will have their access to child benefits cut off, whereas two parents earning up to £85,000 collectively would be entitled to keep it. 1.5 million families could lose as much as £3,000 per year, a significant figure considering that the average cost of raising a child to the age of 21 has recently been estimated at £218,000.

Another condition of the projected legislation states that in order to qualify for working tax credit, couples will have to work 24 hours a week between them.

Certainly, the benefit system is overstretched by many able people opting to live entirely off benefits, an issue which needs to be rectified. However, a system with its criteria defined in black and white terms is not applicable to the circumstances of a large number of families. The UK is experiencing record rates of unemployment, making it even harder to find suitable work and putting single parent families and couples with

only one earning partner at a disadvantage. It is more difficult than ever to keep track of a family’s earnings and so the debate becomes far more complex than simply defending the interests of the middle class. Those families in the grey area posed by the £42,735 cap would be adversely affected, as they would lose child benefit at the same point as their tax rate doubles.

“

No family with children, no matter what their income, should be forced to make concessions when it comes to their welfare."

Logically, the only way for such a system to take the individual needs of a family into account would be through

means-testing, though this would necessitate the implementation of yet more objectionable bureaucracy and cost to the Treasury. However, the greatest cost to the Treasury would be through benefit fraud and legal systems of avoidance, as parents juggle their working hours between them in an attempt to keep their benefit.

The most viable solution would be to integrate Child Benefit with Child Tax Credit and taper withdrawal for the highest earning families. The same savings would be achieved, people would receive an appropriate amount of financial support and there would be no need for yet more irksome means testing bureaucracy. The only downside is that families would not receive aid in the form of a hard cash deposit, but practical solutions should take precedence over technicalities if this is the best way to ensure that all families are accordingly supported.

No family with children, no matter

what their income, should be forced to make concessions when it comes to their welfare. Parents who are only just managing to make ends meet will be forced to cut back on costly necessities, such as correctly fitting shoes, educational materials, childcare and access to a balanced diet. Increases in child poverty induced by the removal of financial support would put additional strain on public services such as the NHS. The deep seated issues associated with child poverty range from health and housing to education and employment, which could all take a turn for the worse under the proposed cuts.

The children of today are tomorrow’s future and in order to gaurantee the best for our country, the government needs to ensure that their wellbeing remains uncompromised. 77 per cent of voters say ‘yes’ to child benefit reform, but it needs to be implemented responsibly and with consideration for those teetering on the “cliff edge”.

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8 Comment

BritLaw Plc.

BOBBIES ON THE BEAT: Would you trust an unaccountable corporation with the policing of Britain's streets?

STEPHEN FRY, against his wishes, is often described as a national treasure. It appears that he may also have a talent for predicting the future. A twenty-year-old sketch from ‘A Bit of Fry and Laurie’ (available on YouTube) features a bewildered man going to the police station to report a stolen car, only to learn of the privatisation of the police. No longer a citizen, but a client of BritLaw Plc, Hugh Laurie’s character struggles to get the assistance he needs. Fry, as the overfriendly desk sergeant, explains that

different levels of the ‘stolen car recovery service’ are on offer at different prices.

Although exaggerated for comic effect, this scenario may have recently become closer to reality.

Revealed by the Guardian last week, the decision by the West Midlands and Surrey police authorities to put several of their key services out to tender to private companies is a worrying development for policing in England and Wales. The paper listed some of the roles that could be contracted out: “investigating crimes,

detaining suspects, developing cases, responding to and investigating incidents, supporting victims and witnesses, managing high-risk individuals, patrolling neighbourhoods, managing intelligence, managing engagement with the public,” as well as less contentious administrative functions. What else, one might ask, do the police do – except, of course, for accepting bribes from media moguls? Just imagine if tabloid newspaper chiefs had to borrow horses from companies such as G4S, instead of our men in blue. It

GOOGLE IMAGES: AKINBAMI

Nick Green discusses the creeping privatisation of the police force and its surprising lack of coverage in the media just wouldn’t be the British way. More seriously, the sheer scale of these contracts, worth a potential £3.5 billion over seven years if other forces were to get involved, is deeply concerning. We need our police to be fully accountable and above the influence of commercial interests and we need to be sure in the knowledge that they are there to protect the public first and foremost.

Police outsourcing is not new. In areas such as Cleveland, 999 calls are handled by private companies, while in Cheshire, police cells have been replaced by euphemistically named ‘custody suites’ where detention is at the pleasure of a faceless corporation. However, these examples are insignificant compared with what is being proposed now. By handing over such huge responsibilities to outside organisations, the police risk losing key skills and capabilities which they may find hard to regain.

Proponents of contracting out police work include former Metropolitan Police Commissioner Sir Ian Blair, who argues that it is simply common sense, a necessary part of reforming the police to cope with financial constraints. He said, “forces can modernise their budgets in the way any other institution would do, namely by reducing unit costs.” But police forces are not like just any institution. They have a unique role that only they can perform. Indeed, it is hard to believe that a privately employed agent – they could hardly be officers – would be as effective on the beat as a warranted bobby. Would the public respect their authority and could they have the same vital link of trust with citizens?

Regardless of the dubious argument that private sector participation can save money, police forces should not be run as businesses. We are citizens, not

shareholders.

This story has not generated as much media or political interest as one might expect. Perhaps it should not be surprising that the Labour frontbench is not yet fervently opposing the plans. It was, after all, New Labour that eagerly involved the private sector in health and education, making it easy for the coalition government to go even further in these areas. As such, these new developments are part of a wider shift towards individualism and a more Thatcherite society-less society.

This ‘transformation initiative’ – to use the official jargon – is possible without new legislation. When the contract invites bidders to perform all policing duties that ‘can be legally delegated to the private sector’ it refers to the status quo. So it might be believed that this development has been the independent choice of individual police authorities.

However, members of those authorities have pointed to the influence of the government, which has paradoxically introduced direct elections for the heads of police authorities and simultaneously encouraged the input of unaccountable outside bodies.

Notable in opposition, however, is Lord Prescott. The former deputy Prime Minister has pledged to ‘keep the police public’ if he succeeds in his bid to become the inaugural Police and Crime Commissioner for Humberside Police.

We can only hope that in November, when the electorate of England and Wales have to choose the new heads of the 41 police forces outside of London, they will endorse the principle of a fully public and accountable police. It would be a beautiful irony if the government’s ‘quiet revolution’ in policing were to be defeated by its own weapon.

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8 Comment

Gloom in the Duma

ONE-HORSE RACE: There were no real challengers to the presidency THE ELECTION victory of Vladimir Putin did not come as a surprise for anyone. On Sunday evening, he addressed a crowd of one hundred thousand people in Moscow with tears in his eyes to celebrate his election as president of the Russian Federation with 63.75 per cent of the votes. Even though his press spokesman later highlighted that the tears rolled down his cheeks due to the cold wind and not for emotional reasons, this was definitely an emotionally charged moment for Russia.

“

Russia has changed since Putin first became president in 2000.

Discontent is displayed more openly."

The legitimacy of Putin’s victory is questionable. According to the Organisation for Security and Cooperation in Europe, there were discrepancies at every third polling station. Assassinations of journalists, government minis-

FLICKR: WORLD ECONOMIC FORUM

Lisa Katrina Lange assesses the significance of Vladimir Putin's election win for Russian democracy

tries taking control of TV channels, the Khordokovsky affair and high levels of corruption have raised suspicion amongst the population. Corruption is seriously incapacitating economic growth. The stagnating economy and corruption charges act as an incentive for change and allegations of voting fraud have fuelled public protest.

Russia has changed since Putin first became president in 2000. Discontent is displayed more openly. Protesters camp out on the street in -22C in Moscow and are being dealt with by a brutal police force. It is not only the “more vocal middle class”, but also the less privileged that are disillusioned with unfulfilled promises. The metaphor used by journalist and author Sergey Schargunow, that the public discontent and protests are like toothpaste that cannot be stuffed back into its tube once it has been squeezed out, sums up the situation perfectly.

However, this does not signify a “Russian spring”. Although the elections might not have been as free and fair as we would like, all opinion polls, even the independent ones, predicted

that Putin would have won a first round victory of about 58-60 per cent.

The living standards in Russia have improved vastly in the last ten years. GDP has doubled and salaries have risen almost tenfold. Putin is associated with the stability that made these positive changes possible and as a result still enjoys widespread popularity.

In terms of voting results, Putin won 44 per cent of the votes in Moscow in comparison to 59 per cent in the rest of Russia. He has three times more votes than Gennady Zyuganov, the communist candidate. Furthermore, the largest opposition party are the communists, not the liberal bloc that is hyped by western media. Compared to the 71.3 per cent of the vote he won in 2004, his popularity seems to be shrinking slightly. However Zyuganov, the second placed communist candidate, was lagging far behind Putin with 17.19 per cent. There is no strong alternative to Putin and certainly not a liberal one.

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A revolution is out of the question...liberal Russians...can either emigrate...or attempt to unite the opposition" The rigging of votes is not in Putin’s interest, because it does not significantly change the election result, but taints his victory. It is this illegitimacy that fuels the protests in Moscow that has been picked up hungrily by western media. Allegations that western media is misrepresenting the number of antiPutin protesters seem grounded in fact.

Furthermore, protesters are isolated to Moscow and the number of protesters is not increasing over time. This shows

that the movement is not genuinely gaining momentum. Unlike the protests in the Arab Spring revolutions, no more than one per cent of Moscow’s population was out on the street.

The protests did stir up some potential for change. Putin’s spokesman told the BBC that he is a “misunderstood liberal”. The fact that Putin and his allies try to display that reforms are possible should be seen in a very positive light. Dimitri Peskov, still head of the government, told the press that Putin is ready for more dialogue with defeated candidates Zyuganov and Mikhail Prokhorov. Current president Medvedev announced that the Russian prosecutor has until April to review the Khodorkovsky case. The protests seem to have given Putin some incentive to campaign more actively than in previous elections and even write seven articles on his policy proposals. There have also been further liberal proposals, for instance the reduction of the entry barrier into the Duma from seven to five per cent, the reduction of the required number of signatures for party registration and the reintroduction of direct elections for governors.

However, these promises are not actions. A revolution is out of the question. There are two main courses of action that liberal Russians who are disillusioned with the regime can take; emigrate like Wladimir Ryschkow, one of the opposition leaders, or attempt to unite the opposition by forming one party that has a chance in the Duma election.

The central questions for the future of Russia are whether Putin’s centralisation of government will continue to undermine the checks and balances that are an integral part of democracy and whether he will be able to fulfil his promises to rebuild the Russian economy.

Huge on small government?

Joe Pilkington explores the breadth of the Republican Party's association with limited government FOR ALL their success in uprooting Democratic government by retaking the House of Representatives in November 2010, the Republican leadership in Washington is still confined to posturing when it comes to opposing the Obama White House. The Republican Party at the moment appears to be following the lead of state governments. After all, it’s in state houses across the nation where governance is actually happening.

The real gains of 2010 for the Grand Old Party (GOP) took place in the assemblies and governor’s mansions across the country, where disillusionment following the inability of a new president to create revolutionary change in the economy has resulted in the shift of state power towards the right.

For much of the president’s first term, these governments have quietly prepared and implemented a wave of social legislation bent, it seems, on reverting rights for workers in Ohio and Indiana, women in Texas, Virginia, Pennsylvania and immigrants in Arizona to their circa-1950 status. The faltering economic recovery has allowed the GOP to smother protest to the changes with criticism of Obama’s handling of the economy.

It seems that 2012 has come too late for Republicans to craft a coherent mes-

sage for a national victory. Their bluff has been called by the release of figures that show employment at its highest since the financial crisis in 2008; the reemergence of the US as a net oil exporter (strangling in the cradle the Republicans’ drill, baby, drill” mantra); and the return of General Motors to pole position in the world’s car manufacturing industry, surpassing even the mighty Japanese giant Toyota.

“

Perhaps it is time for the Democrats to start utilising the smallgovernment message."

Lacking an economic stick with which to beat Obama, the switch to plugging a social agenda came as little surprise. With little to define the Republican Party on a national stage, their presidential candidates are about as appetising as cold tea, reflected by their Congress approval rating of barely 10 per cent; all eyes turn to the advertisement for Republican government in the states.

How is that working out? Well, there

isn’t space to delve into 2012 Virginia politics in this column. But if you’re so inclined, take a look online to find out why a ‘VP’ associated with Governor Bob McDonnell is no longer an acronym for ‘Vice President’, but ‘Vaginal Probe’. It shouldn’t take you long. Ah, the wonders of Google News…

Needless to say, the subtle project of reversing women’s healthcare rights to the days of Harry Truman in several states has finally attracted some attention from the media-at-large. What is truly remarkable, however, is that the Republicans have met the controversy with defiance at both state and national level. Obama’s new health legislation, coming into force this August, states that employers must provide health insurance for female employees that will provide contraception. Polls indicate that challenging this would be unpopular, but Republican strategists seem to think it would be sensible to ignore these.

Republican defiance has affected potential Vice-Presidential nominees, but for the moment they seem keen to embrace and defend the message coming from state governments and the campaign of former-Pennsylvania Senator Rick Santorum. Even if, as

some have suggested, the GOP has a long-term strategy in mind and they seek to implement a gradual movement of the centre of American politics to the right, their approach still seems thickheaded and extreme. Americans will put up with a lot of government intervention if it is framed as defence of religious freedom, but the hypocrisies thrown up by this wave of legislation make the Republicans’ claim to be ‘the party of small government’ seem highly ironic.

Pennsylvania is apparently willing to force ultrasounds on women prior to abortion in such a way that they can see and hear the heartbeat of the foetus, making anti-government intrusion argument seem highly irrelevant. If Governor McDonnell desires government to be small enough to fit inside a woman’s genitalia at the insistence of the state, as is the case in Texas, then perhaps it’s time for the Democrats to start utilising the small-government message that has served the GOP so well for so many years.

One thing is for sure: a governor’s chance at defeating Mitt Romney this November is miniscule. Therefore, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Marco Rubio to the stage.

Disco balls and rollerskates I found myself dozing off to the soothing voice of David Dimbleby the other night, whilst the upstanding citizens of Guildford watched the political establishment tiptoe around the issue of same-sex marriage.

The likening of gay marriage to the slave trade by Scotland’s own Cardinal O’Brien has drawn the valuable support of Mugabe aides and the damaging fury of Rufus Wainwright. Surprisingly, the most convincing contribution on Question Time came from Will Young, sporting his intelligensia-chic combo of tweed and Lennon-esque spectacles.

The most heated argument was between Pop Idol himself and Daily Mail columnist Janice AtkinsonSmall, looking like she had taken a wrong turn on her way to a black market fox hunt. Young picked up on her sneaky use of the ‘what comes next?’ rhetoric and rightly labelled it as scare-mongering. Young, along with Will Self – who perfectly pinpointed the pantomime nature of Question Time by ending one of his spiels with an “am I right?!” – managed to pick up on the fact that Mail commentators and the Catholic Church have been allowed to frame the debate around the idea of the precious institution that is marriage.

The ‘slippery slope’ criticism is based on the fear that once we legalise gay marriage, society may actually realise that gay couples are in fact couples, just like any heterosexual couple. This kind of thinking is a bit like those who refuse to watch The Notebook in fear of the possibility that they might actually enjoy themselves.

Whilst Young was shredding Atkinson-Small’s arguments to pieces, Eric Pickles (the one who looks like a face drawn on a swollen thumb) and Caroline Flint (a former parliament pin-up) were sitting quietly, either side of Dimbledad, waiting for their turn to defend equal marriage. When they were called on, they did what was expected of them, but it seems to be the nature of political panel shows that the passionate arguments are left to the non-politicos.

Government ministers and opposition politicians alike are terrified both of sounding like homophobes and of sounding like what AtkinsonSmall termed “extreme gay lobbyists”. Thank god for Will “we’re not gonna turn up with giant disco balls” Young, being the most eloquent supporter of this universal human right, which him and his rollerskating extremist friends are apparently secretly subverting.

Daniel Kraemer

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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1 Features

Altruism or self-interest?

Varvara Bashkirova asks why the international community has not aided Syrian rebels in the way it helped Libya

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The situation is seen by the public as an ideological conflict between the liberal West and the autocratic regimes of Russia and China who support Assad's tyranny" On the other hand, violence in Syria has been reported in the media since late spring 2011. So why is the reaction of the West so different this time, when the issue resembles last year’s affair so much?

There are many factors that distinguish the two seemingly similar uprisings. Firstly, Libyan military strength was not even close to that of Syria. With an estimated 300,000 well-trained Syrians in the armed forces, they would pose a considerable challenge even to top Western soldiers. Compare these numbers to the mere 50,000 of semiorganised Libyans facing the Nato forces last year and it becomes understandable why UN members have not been rushing to provide help to the Syrian rebels.

Another point to consider is the Syrian air defence. It has improved significantly in recent years, which would make targeted bombing campaigns similar to those carried out in Libya much more challenging. This also

makes humanitarian aid more difficult to deliver as well.

Other elements making Syria harder to intervene in include its neighbouring countries. Neither Iraq nor Lebanon would agree to have Western reserve units pre-positioned on their territories, whilst Libya’s location on the sea shore made it an easy target.

Finally, there is a crucial difference in the scale of the uprising itself. While Libyan rebels rapidly got hold of the whole of Eastern Libya, the Free Syrian Army still manages to control only a couple of neighbourhood areas and well-armed and organised state forces still control the Syrian frontiers.

Despite all of these potential threats, the UN Security Council nevertheless produced an Intervention Resolution, similar to Resolution 1973 passed about Libya last year. President Obama presented it as a no-alternative case, acting in the best traditions of the Truman Doctrine when arguing it was crucial to protect free people from the assaults of the non-democratic Syrian government. For the US, it seemed that the mission of bringing freedom to the world outweighed the potential risks involved in the operation.

However, Russia and China vetoed the resolution, enraging the Western countries, especially America. Now the situation is seen by the public as an ideological conflict between the liberal West and the autocratic regimes of Russia and China who support Assad’s tyranny.

In response to such views, Putin published an article in which he addressed the issue. In it he seems to argue that the reason to veto the resolution was once again to encourage democratic tendencies in Syria and to bring peace in the area. Foreign support of one side of the internal conflict, he writes, would only further escalate violence, thus compromising the original purpose of the UN, which is preservation of peace. Putin then argues that diplomatic encouragement of peaceful settlement is needed instead - which can only be achieved by unbiased work with both sides of the conflict.

Publicly, both Russia and the US appear to be very passionate about the case, eagerly criticising each others’ policies. Clinton called the Russian veto a ‘despicable’ action, while Putin attacked America’s inability to learn from the past. At first glance, then, it seems like the two major powers have a common goal of aiding the people of Syria, only disagreeing about how to do so.

Unfortunately, the reasons are not as straightforward. The reality of realpolitik is that there are less obvious and perhaps much less pleasant motives driving these countries, namely the struggle for political and economic control over the Middle East. In this sense, Libya and Syria are indeed very

similar; for the political giants, they present yet another opportunity to gain influence, in the same way that Egypt, Iraq and Iran have been.

The American interests are quite clear and were touched upon in Putin’s article where he wrote: “One can think that the tragic events have been to a certain extent inspired not by human rights concerns but by someone’s interest in redistribution of the market.”

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Syria, just like Libya was last year, has found itself in the middle of a bigger political conflict, in which the future of entire countries depends upon the interests of more powerful ones" The global economy of the US requires massive resources and expansion into new markets; interfering in the Middle East affairs gives it just that. Putin may be right in saying that military aid to the opposition forces is likely to spark a new wave of violence, but this will not stop the US from acting, rather the contrary.

Escalating conflict would result in a need for restoring the economic strength of Syria once military actions are over and this is where the US will be able to offer its help once again, thus expanding its economic and political influence.

The reality is that wars in the Middle East actually benefit the US. Although Syria has practically no oil in comparison to Libya, it nevertheless has lots of other natural resources. Bordering with Israel, Turkey and Iraq, it holds an important strategic spot in the area.

The argument has had support among the Western public and intelligence. University of Texas public affairs professor Alan Kuperman wrote in the Boston Globe: “Evidence is now in that President Barack Obama grossly exaggerated the humanitarian threat to justify military action in Libya.” There are reasons to suggest that this is the case with Syria too.

British journalist Lizzie Phelan, who recently went to Damascus, has said that the reality there was not even close to the horrors described

by Western media. In an interview given to Syrian TV in January 2012, she described life in Damascus as very safe, adding that the majority of people there supported the ruling government. These testimonies posed serious questions as to how the propaganda of the media can play a crucial role when

shaping public opinion on government policies.

Surely, the West alone is not to blame for imperialistic ambitions as Putin is no advocate of democratic freedoms himself. His own argument about the USA looking for economic expansion can be easily converted to question Russia’s own motives. American intervention in Syria would bring the US ‘extra points’ in a long struggle for influence between the US and Russia. Russia used to have political control over the Middle East, but has been losing it gradually since the fall of the USSR in 1991.

Moscow does not have that many strategic relations in the area at the moment and can count Syria as its main ally as its position in Iran is weakening.

Similarly, its economic influence in the area is threatened, because it has long been Syria’s main arms supplier.

Russia also needs to ensure that it remains Europe’s main supplier of natural gas. With the gas discovered

in the Mediterranean, it is crucial for Moscow to maintain influence over the region, with Syria being one of the ‘entry’ points, along with Cyprus, possibly.

There are other complicated factors, but the overall picture is clear: Syria, just like Libya was last year, has found itself in the middle of a bigger political conflict, in which the future of entire countries depends upon the interests of more powerful ones.

The legacy of the Arab Spring is one of the most significant phenomena occurring in world politics at the moment. People talk of the rise of democracy in the Islamist countries and of the big changes in the people’s lives and mentality. However, it is still a big question as to who turns out to be the true beneficiary, while such terms as ‘sensationalist media’, ‘imperialism’ and ‘economic globalisation’ become an inalienable part of any conversation concerning the Middle East.

WATCHFUL EYE: President Bashar al-Assad is fighting to keep power in Syria

COPEPODO

WITH VIOLENCE escalating in Homes and Damascus, intervention in Syria seems to have become a burning issue on the agenda of world political leaders. It is on the news constantly: we hear President Obama talking about the need to promote world democracy; Hillary Clinton, secretary of state, arguing that Russia and China act in a ‘despicable’ fashion when vetoing the UN resolution to intervene; and Prime Minister Putin writing on how intervention would actually undermine the establishment of democracy in the country.

There is a lot of talking going on, mostly about the necessity to bring freedom, democracy and human rights to Syria in the general spirit of the Arab Spring.Whilst the rhetoric continues, 7,500 civilians have been killed in Syria according to UN officials and two Western journalists have also died.

The West’s inaction seems inexplicable at first glance. It becomes even more so when the situation is compared with last year’s uprising in Libya.

Resolution 1973, which highlighted concerns about the limited military intervention, was adopted by UN members only a month after Gaddafi attacked the rebels for the first time.

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Features 11

How to save face(book)

FACEBOOK 'STALKING': Do you need to worry about how it could effect your employability?

EFFECTIVE CV. Check. Snappy cover letter. Check. Appropriate Facebook profile…? In an age of persistent information distribution it is vital that we are aware of both the benefits and the risks of social networking groups.

Intended as a tool for communication, Facebook now has at least 845 million active users. It provides a social platform: a means to keep tabs on friends and acquaintances, to share what you’re doing and now, less favorably, it has become an extension of your job application.

The ‘Facebook Revolution’ has brought with it a reverberating threat as our personal and professional lives collide. The thought of a future boss trawling their way through our countless supply of tagged drunken photos has become a painful reality. To tweet or not to tweet? What is appropriate and what is not? And just how private are our privacy settings? It appears that by logging onto social networking sites, we are publicising our private conversations with the world in the form of an online diary. Alongside the numerous benefits of Facebook, the 21st century has created a ruthless new tool on which to base first impressions and, more disturbingly, our potential employability.

According to a new study in the US, this is not necessarily a bad thing. By engaging in Facebook ‘stalking’, your

potential boss can predict how good you will be as an employee and how well you may fit into their corporation.

In this study, researchers considered photos, hobbies, number of friends and other criteria before considering questions such as: “how dependable is this person?”. Their research showed a strong correlation between job success and certain profile page characteristics.

“

To tweet or not to tweet? What is appropriate and what is not? And just how private are our privacy settings?"

According to the experiment, the higher the number of friends, and the wider the range of interests, such as photos of far-flung travels, the higher the person’s prospects. Photos of partying were cast in a positive light, apparently portraying the person as more sociable and extroverted.

However, it seems unlikely that this is true in all cases. I doubt any of us social butterflies could name all of our friends on facebook. Equally, I’m not sure how much our future boss

would appreciate seeing us on our ‘gap yahs’, touring bars as opposed to historic sights. However, Facebook does not necessarily destroy all of our chances in regards to our career. After all, our future boss is also human – and probably has Facebook.

Regardless of the effects of facebook ‘stalking’, it is perhaps more important to ask whether spying in this manner is fair. Is judging employees by their profile pages ethically correct?

If an employer were to log onto your Facebook account and begin perusing your photos and wall posts, they would be violating computer hacking laws. However, when we tick a box and consciously decide to share everything online, there are always bound to be privacy loopholes and arguably this is our own fault. You would think that this would encourage us to be discreet.

However, for the vast majority of us, this is not the case. Thoughtless status updates litter our newsfeed – and often backfire. Although investigating our personal lives via Facebook may seem to be on par with phone hacking, our choice to broadcast our daily lives across the globe makes it difficult for us to justify any complaints based on the violation of rights. Furthermore, if laws were created, they would be almost impossible to enforce. Ultimately, there is nothing stopping em-

PHOTOEDITORVISION

Sophie Dimitri continues the Facebook discussion by questioning its place in our work life ployers from performing meticulous background checks on applicants.

Besides, it seems unreasonable to expect corporations not to. In an overcrowded job market, employers need to make use of every tool possible.

They don’t want to hire a madman.

Equally important to corporations is the awareness of employees bringing discredit to their name via internet activity. Therefore, although it seems unethical, if we have made the information accessible, companies have every right to evaluate us online. We have created our own online personas, and essentially we have chosen to advertise ourselves in a certain way.

According to Facebook’s privacy policy, users are allowed, “to choose the information…(they) provide to friends and networks”. However, as previously stated, despite us taking steps to ensure our privacy, we can never be 100% certain. For example, when you add an app, you are essentially taking part in a trade off: your personal information in return for a game of Angry Birds. It seems that the only viable way to ensure your social networking has no impact on your professional life is simply not to use it. This is where a catch twentytwo triumphs. Who can live without them? In today’s world of instant messaging, Facebook has become almost as important as emails: it is a means to organise events, invitations, protests – even some universities communicate with their students via Facebook.

Frankly, it is probably more strange for an employer to discover you don’t have Facebook. This leads to the next dilemna: what do you do if your boss wants to be your friend on Facebook?

Option number one: do nothing.

Ignore their request and hope it goes away, consequently portraying yourself as someone unable to communicate or follow through.

Two: deny them your much sort after friendship. Perhaps pathetically argue that Facebook is just “for my family and friends”.

Three: accept them and with the click of a button, expose them to your entire life. Enough said.

“

When you add an app, you are essentially taking part in a trade off: your personal information in return for a game of Angry Birds."

Four: redirect them to LinkedIn, along with the suggestion that you want to keep business and pleasure separate, although this runs the risk of implying you’ve something to hide.

Or the last option: use Facebook’s privacy settings to their full potential; a time consuming and complex trial, yet a way of maintaining some control and therefore dignity over what information reaches what people.

Clearly, this situation can quickly become an awkward one, as there are few credible and advantageous escape

routes.

Despite the endless traps Facebook has created, if used sensibly it can work to benefit you. It has now become an online marketplace. Through use of pages, ads and sponsored sites, Facebook provides us with tools to effectively reach an audience of hundreds and millions – we only have to look at the recent ‘KONY 2012’ video which went viral in a matter of days.

In an overcrowded job market, it is easy to reach the conclusion that you are merely another résumé in the pile.

However, by creating a personalised ‘advert’ through Facebook, you can publish your skills and qualifications; publicise what job you are looking for and then target the companies you want to work for. By showing that your job skills are the most up-to-date and easy to see, you make it simpler for people to think about hiring you.

“

Although it seems unethical, if we have made the information accessible, companies have every right to evaluate us online. We have created our own online personas, and essentially we have chosen to advertise ourselves in a certain way."

The trick is to make sure you’re presenting your best, most employable self on Facebook. To do this, you need to be organised, thoughtful and disciplined about what you post. Sharing a link to a BBC news story and commenting on it thoughtfully? Yes. Sharing a link showing your support for BNP? No. For emotional stability, it is probably best not to update frequent posts that could demonstrate uncontrollable mood swings – complaining about your boyfriend or girlfriend one minute and announcing your undying love for them the next.

In the ‘About Me’ section, think about changing your music tastes away from bands with heavy associations of drug culture and move towards artists such as Andreas Boccelli, a more mainstream and cultured option. Cull the number of reality TV shows you ‘like’ and add series and news programmes, giving off the impression that you like keeping up with current affairs as well as entertainment. Replace activities and hobbies such as “sex” and “hotboxing my car” to more conservative activities such as interior design and cooking.

We have to make a decision: either we function without facebook or we keep it with a few changes to our online personalities. Although this may seem bordering on the ridiculous, it is something to bear in mind, especially when we consider that soon we may not be handing in job applications but instead the link to our facebook page.

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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12 Features

Six degrees of innovation

THROUGHOUT MY four years of university, I’ve taken classes in geology, criminology, and statistics, just to name a few. Did I mention my degree is in English Literature? Before you believe that I’ve found Hermione Granger’s time turner, let me explain.

I attended The George Washington University (GW) in DC for two years, decided to study abroad at the University of Edinburgh and felt more at home bumping into authors instead of politicians and transferred here.

However, I traded more than just the Washington Monument for Sir Walter Scott’s, but a completely different degree system.

When I was a freshman at GW, I was put into America’s famous liberal arts system. According to Howard and Matthew Greene’s book, Hidden Ivies: Thirty Colleges of Excellence, the benefit of a liberal arts educations is, “to develop a high degree of intellectual literacy and critical-thinking skills, a sense of moral and ethical responsibility to one’s community, the ability to reason clearly, to think rationally, to analyze information intelligently...” in order to thrive in our undulating complex world.

In practice though, it can be surprisingly stifling. Although I was keen enough to declare my English Literature degree in the second semester of my first year (most students have to declare by the end of second year), I barely had time to take courses in the subject because I was so busy fulfilling general curriculum requirements. To ensure I was becoming a ‘well-rounded’ student, I suffered through vomiting during a foetal pig dissection for my biology course and had to repeat the same French courses I took in high school.

“

In accepting that their new role is to teach students how to manipulate, share or extend their knowledge, universities must acknowledge that curriculums cannot work in the way they used to."

It wasn’t all nauseating though; my photography course visited art museums and the knowledge of botany I picked up the aforementioned biology course helped me in the Victorian literature course I took last semester.

Of course, many students do take a random sociology course to fulfil a requirement and discover it’s their passion so the liberal arts system has done its work. Nevertheless, one of Edinburgh University’s appeals was how I could just study Shakespeare if I wanted to.

My zeal for the Bard over biology was part of the reason I was able to transfer to finish my degree here.

I barely deviated from the third year English Literature curriculum whilst

on my year abroad, a rarity amongst exchange students. However, it was only during my fourth year that I realised my focus was limiting. Although I don’t miss computing math problems back at GW, just reading novels isn’t fulfilling either. However, I’m not the only one who recognises this.

Sue Rigby, Assistant Principal of Taught Postgraduate Programmes, noted this three years ago when the University extended the teaching year and found the semester schedule asymmetrical in doing so. The University faced the conundrum of what to do with the spare week in semester two, this was where Rigby stepped in and suggested what would become Innovative Learning Week (ILW).

She proposed that the University use the spare week, “for atypical teaching encounters. Most of the time if you’re trying to teach 30,000 students in a state like ours, you have to be very very rigid in the time tabling of events and that means that there’s no possibility for loose interactions, for longer term interactions. It’s hard to generate spaces or events that might be slower to start, for example group working or letting students have control over their curriculum. It’s very hard to do that if you’ve got 50 minutes for a lecture,” Rigby said.

At its most basic, ILW is a week to press pause on formal teaching and try more informal encounters instead.

However, nothing is basic when dealing with educational bureaucracy and it took a year just to convince every school of the benefit of ILW and two years to plan it, hence the inaugural week only just last month which Rigby described as a “learning experience”.

Yet we learned a lot in the first ILW. By 2012, the initial single goal of ILW had morphed into two. Firstly, Rigby said, “It’s giving students experiences they couldn’t get otherwise, that are of value to them and because value is a very multi-faceted concept that means we have to do an awful lot of different activities. Also, it gives academics a sandpit to try new teaching methods.”

Rigby was quick to clarify that the University’s academics are already topnotch teachers, but ILW lets them take risks and she believes the recent ILW has already implemented this change.

The second goal is, “asking students what they would like in their curriculum because we never do that and we know it’s good practice and we would like to,” said Rigby. Students clearly liked ILW, with successes with robotics film screenings in Informatics and a pairing between ECA and the School of Chemistry involving the illustration of scientific phenomena.

According to Rigby, ILW has created “a sense of subject value”. She went on to say, “when you open up your subject to other disciplines, it’s clearer what that is. They provide a mirror for what your own subject is.” This is crucial in the ever-changing world of education after the dawn of internet.

Universities are no longer the locus of information. You can easily wikipedia the same thing you would learn about in a lecture, but the real issue is would you know what to do with that information? This is the benefit of universities. In accepting that their new

GOOD TURNOUT: But are any of these students here to further their knowledge or because they are required to be? role is to teach students how to manipulate, share or extend their knowledge, universities must acknowledge that curriculums cannot work in the way they used to. Edinburgh has already been on the forefront of this with its open degree structure for the first two years. The ability to take multiple subjects is something unique to Scotland and why Rigby believes ILW would only work here.

“The value in an Edinburgh degree is you get to study across so many different fields to begin with that you get those knowledge ranges across a variety of subjects. You’re more resilient, more learned, but you know less about the degree subject you’ve come to study,” Rigby said. “To me, that’s not a deficit model because you can find what you need to know anywhere that has internet connection, but you can’t find out what to do with it. You just end up with an indigestible wad of stuff, so universities help to digest it.”

The University cannot revolutionise its curriculum because it must remain

competitive with other UK universities, but ILW helps plant the idea in students and academics heads to expand their educational horizons.

“

Taking a course completely divergent from your discipline can intimidate students out of fear that it might negatively impact their transcript."

After an editorial in The Guardian about a student who attends lectures he’s not enrolled in surfaced last month, you had to speculate what the University’s policy on that would be. Rigby said, “We would love that!”

However, she recognises the apprehension of it to some students.

Taking a course completely divergent from your discipline can intimidate students out of fear that it might negatively impact their transcript.

ILW can help here. It’s “a place where you could do something you were very good at or didn’t know your skill level in without taking a risk with your degree transcript and maybe prime yourself to do a course in it a year after,” she said.

“The encouragement is to be reflective about your own learning.”

It’s pertinent for its longevity that ILW grow organically, so we won’t know its full effect for a few years. “It challenges students and we have to wait a few years to see how both students and academics react to that challenge,” Rigby said. Yet the University is instating it as an annual tradition so we will have the time to learn.

I’m almost sad to be graduating this June. ILW seems like the answer to more than just my academic unrest, but the shifting educational world.

ANATOLIAYEMEN

Tess Malone looks at how the University is moving towards providing a more holistic education

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Lifestyle 13 Grumpy Old Students

JOANNA LISIOVEC

Vintage or just old crap?

Blast from the past

CROWN JEWELS: Owner, Nina, in her vintage palace THE VINTAGE bug is fast spreading and seems to be the perfect antidote for the fast paced technological world we live in. Looking backwards is the new way to be fashion forward. Vintage fairs are popping up across the country, attracting students with affordable price tags and the allure of finding unique, one-of-a-kind pieces. The trend has even stitched its way into the high street, with ‘vintage inspired’ looks dominating stores and the introduction of retro revival lines in stores such as Topshop and Miss Selfridge.

After spending an afternoon back in time down the cobbled streets of London’s Brick Lane, I realised that vintage clothing is so much more than

ANNA BRUCE

Lilidh Kendrick turns back the clock to examine Edinburgh's vintage offerings with The Frayed Hem

simply fabric and stitches. Fortunately, Edinburgh is well on its way to becoming an important up-and-coming vintage capital. The trailblazing Armstrong & Son’s empire is joined by vibrant vintage pop up shops in Stockbridge and charming boutiques in old town such as The Frayed Hem. Inspired by my foray into the world of vintage and pining for my next vintage fix, I headed to The Frayed Hem to meet owner, Nina, a former University of Edinburgh student, to find out what led to her venture into the world of vintage trading and her opinion of the trend in Edinburgh.

Nina and her mum have run this affordable vintage, retro and second

hand boutique on Cockburn Street for just over a year. Walking into the The Frayed Hem, you are truly transported back to bygone eras of glamour, sophistication and mischief. Fur, silks, lace, satins and sequins are draped over charming mismatched furniture, illuminated by glittering chandeliers.

Understanding how intimidating buying vintage clothing can be, Nina intentionally laid out her store to be as inviting and uncluttered as possible.

As a former student, Nina is no stranger to counting the pennies and is a great advocate of affordable vintage.

It’s true 'they don’t make ‘em like they used to' and here it isn’t hard to strike vintage gold. You are sure to find beautifully handcrafted pieces without the exorbitant haute couture price tag - so you can wear the proverbial fur coat without sacrificing on the knickers.

The Frayed Hem houses an assortment of both older and more recent second hand clothing. Nina will even buy and swap vintage clothes with her customers, which is very handy at the end of the month when the life has been sapped out of our loans.

Her customers vary from students to hardcore vintage scavengers and to passers-by just drawn in by the curious objects and ephemera in the window displays. Her advice to any unsure vintage virgins is to start small by adding a little brooch or a scarf to an outfit, an interesting element, before moving on

to bigger things. More than anything, take risks, mix things up, combine items from different time periods and dare to use clashing colours and materials. After all, vintage is an expression of personality and creativity.

Nina never considered this career path during her university days, but vintage retail was always an underlying passion. She freely admits her student years were characterised by indecision, trying different universities and different degrees before finding the right one. After graduating and finding herself bored and unfulfilled in London, she returned home to Stockbridge where her mum’s pop-up vintage shop motivated her vintage venture.

Nina confesses that although starting up your own business can be a daunting prospect, choosing a job you love truly does mean you’ll never work a day in your life. Her advice when it comes to both starting a business and wearing vintage is to just go for it. And Nina, sitting in her own vintage paradise, is the epitome of what you can achieve when you do just that.

45 Cockburn Street, Edinburgh, EH1 1BS www.thefrayedhem.com Find The Frayed Hem and other vintage stalls at Judy's Affordable Vintage Fair on March 17th, 11-4pm. 36 Dalmeny Street, EH38RG.

The essential mix

Betsy Chadbourn interviews three Edinburgh students on their wardrobe must-haves WHEN YOU’RE a self-pitying, penny-counting student with a fullyextended overdraft and a wishlist as hefty as the deadline pile on your desk, there’s nothing better than being prepared. Having some key essentials floating around your wardrobe is the way to do just that.

Three second year undergraduates told The Student all about their musthaves and go-to stores and what they do to keep on trend, whilst keeping their wallets happy.

Now, who are these mystery interviewees, I hear you ask. Grace Plenderleith, a Philosophy and Theology student with a penchant for impractical knitwear, neutrals and a borderline unhealthy obsession with Topshop – yes, the security guard knows her by sight. Kate Charters, studying Spanish and German, finds that a frugal attitude towards fashion, along with a blase outlook on following the crowd, gives her the simple yet quirky style she is known for. Finally, Rosy Harper, a vintage queen from the History and German school, channels Olivia Palermo and Elizabeth Taylor in one, with her keen eye for charity shop buys and classic pieces.

“I know what I like, and I stick to it,”

Plenderleith said with a cheeky smile.

“People may think that sticking to typical student stores on the High Street is really conformist and unadventurous, but I make the clothes my own. I love Topshop and Urban Outfitters too much to try and be all high-fashion!”

Her wardrobe is a keen reflection of these wise words. Made up of figurehugging bodycon skirts and dresses, frothy chiffon tops and skimpy sweaters with shades varying from Chantilly cream and ivory, to cocoa putty and deep beige. Simple, feminine and wearable – a style she has accumulated from the influence of people she sees every day.

“I think you definitely get inspired by other students at the University. The way I dress is very different to other people in my course, but still in-keeping with the student look.”

Her fashion essentials? A pair of black Topshop skinnies, an oversized hoodie and a good pair of calf-high boots – perfect for that long trek to New College.

Charters couldn’t be more different. Often found in brightly coloured odd socks and her trademark navy, hooded parka, her style boasts comfort and practicality, while maintaining

her individuality. Her wardrobe offers a plethora of chunky Fair Isle knits, bohemian patterns and colourful jersey separates. Colour schemes range from very tame grey and cream, to eye-popping pink and blue- ideal for those long days at George Square or equally long nights trying to meet a deadline.

“My favourite stores would have to be Fat Face and H&M. I think my style is shaped by the models in their clothing campaigns or by the films that I watch; people say I’m quirky, but I do like basic pieces that don’t go out of fashion.”

Yet, on a night out, Charters can be found in an eccentric sequin shift dress with wild curls and red lips – think Vivienne Westwood meets Betsey Johnson.

As for her essentials: original blue denim skinny jeans, beaten-up Converse and a jersey top.

Last, but most definitely not least, Harper. She can often be found making the library a more stylish place in her cropped sweaters, paper-bag-waist skirts and brogues, armed with a classic Longchamp bag. Describing her personal style as smart and put-together, Harper leans towards the traditional charcoal black, sky blue and neutral as

her palette of choice.

“The students on my course tend to have a classically elegant style and I think I play into that. Longchamp is very popular – I’ve seen quite a few girls with my bag! As for my individual taste, I really admire Olivia Palermo; she always looks so clean cut. I think that’s why I have such a weakness for Zara and Mulberry; I’d shop there all the time… if I had the money of course.”

On a night out, you’ll never see Harper without her black, suede fringed bag, with a cross-body chain handle. A star essential that we approve of.

“It’s big enough so that I won’t lose it, but it also goes with everything!’‘ And her essentials? A printed vintage scarf, fitted blazer jacket and her Longchamp – of course.

We all have those indispensable items that we reach for every day and there is no shame in that. Having key pieces that show off your individual style and prove fashionable season in, season out, is a sensible way to dress when you’re a student. But fear not, there will come a time when you can spend to your heart’s content and when you won’t want to sob into a bottle of cheap alcohol every time you see your bank statement…one day.

MOST BRITISH cities have at least one or two vintage clothes stores. But how much of a life must their items have had before they can be considered ‘vintage’?

The very word ‘vintage’ should be a reliable label, which successfully alerts us to something with some history, quality or innovation. It is a functional linguistic marker by Port houses to reflect on past years and declare that a certain standard of superior alcohol had been reached. To try and impose such elite methods from the smug wine world initially seems arrogant, but is it any more conceited than the smug rails of C&A shirts and self-assured St Michael jumpers that are being paraded as vintage stock? The crooks that run these bastardised clothing emporiums can justify high inner city rents, so the stuff obviously sells. Yet we are being provided with what is effectively a jumble sale. It is old and used, but most of it really should be thrown away.

There’s still a certain exoticism in the idea of vintage clothing. Taking inspiration from past garments, the individual can become the orchestrator of their own life-in-style, drawing on history when he or she chooses to.

Nothing should be thrown out, as it may come back into fashion and dipping into the great archive allows them to curate their modern selves. Though a glamorous notion, by the time this becomes an established high street method, it is formulaic and lacks romance.

These shops lure us in with quite a few original and ballsy pieces, but God help you if you’d actually want to buy one of these items. They’re purely there to decorate the window displays and hanging installations. One parts with cash for stuff that’s polite and boring - wearable, but far too pricey.

Fashion is a complex cultural vehicle with a constant drive for change. It needs to look to its history in order to cut, paste and twist new ideas.

The archive and collection is easier to draw upon and reference than ever before. The model is echoed in pop songs, where numerous 90s sub styles have embedded themselves in modern music. When reworked into something new and relevant, it is beautiful and innovative: tunes with chutzpah and cultural weight.

The high street vintage shops flogging bad 90s and early 00s clothes as vintage are more like the bargain bins of clunky CDs that one used to find in every Virgin Megastore – the music that no one really wanted the first time around. Alternatively we could compare it with the current tame trend for re-issues and re-union tours. It’s dull.

Ben Hoare

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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Worming your way out of death

LISA LANGE

SCIENCE & ENVIRONMENT Are planarian flatworms immortal? We might never know, says Katy Sheen, but the evidence is promising WE ARE now one step closer to discovering the secret of immortality, thanks to researchers at the University of Nottingham. Studying ageing in planarian flatworms, they have found that these small, asexual worms have mechanisms to avoid the ageing of cells. This would theoretically allow them to divide and regenerate an infinite number of times.

This raises the question: what significance could this information have with regard to the ageing process in humans?

Dr Aziz Aboobaker, head of the team in Nottingham, explains: “We have a colony of several thousand animals… they have this amazing ability to regenerate. We study how they regenerate: what are the genes that control regeneration? Because they split in half, the cells that are in the old one are in the new one, so in some sense it is the same animal… I kept encountering the question ‘Are these animals immortal?’”

Regeneration is possible for the worms due to a large supply of stem cells. These cells are able to develop into any type of specialised cell, allowing the worms to replace any system in the body.

If a worm is cut in half, the tail will grow a new brain in the space of a week.

Humans have stem cells too, even

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Stem cells are able to develop into any type of specialised cell, allowing the worms to replace any system in the body"

QUESTION: What happens if you put them in a blender? as adults. We are able to repair damage to our bodies to a certain extent but we haven’t evolved to replace whole organs or tissues like the planarian flatworms.

Our stem cells show signs of ageing after a number of divisions. This is because chromosomes have protective caps on their ends called telomeres, which are eroded slightly with every cell division. Eventually, when the caps are completely eroded, the cells are unable to divide and exhausted cells are no longer replaced. One effect of this can be seen in the wrinkles that form in our skin as we get older.

The potential for immortality appears to be closely linked with the bi-

ology of telomeres. Dr Aboobaker explains, “You can’t actually answer the question ‘is an individual worm immortal?’ because you would die before you found out. But you can ask ‘what would an immortal animal be able to do?’ You can think of the other molecular processes that result in other animals ageing. Top of the list of theories is telomeres… chromosomes get shorter as cells replicate and you need an enzyme called telomerase to rejuvenate telomere ends. So we just had the simple question, how do the asexual planarians cope with this?”

Dr Thomas Tan conducted a series of experiments to identify the gene for

BRADY HARAN

“

The worms have mechanisms to avoid the ageing of cells, theoretically allowing them to regenerate an infinite number of times."

planarians is important because we can use it as a model system.”

the telomerase enzyme. When this gene was ‘turned off ’, telomere length was no longer maintained. It was found that during regeneration, the activity of this gene is increased. Dr Aboobaker said that “It’s a very precise control of the gene for the telomerase enzyme that makes the telomeres longer.”

These findings could have some relevance for human ageing in the future.

Dr Aboobaker said: “It shows that it is possible for an animal with stem cells to maintain telomeres and be healthy… human ageing does seem to be correlated to telomere length to some extent but those studies are ongoing. I think more work with telomere biology and

There are other problems to overcome in order to achieve immortality.

Dr Aboobaker explains: “We need to look at things like whether they are accumulating mutations…[the reason] why asexuality isn’t very common in the animal kingdom is that asexual animals don’t undergo meiotic recombination: they don’t mix up their genes.” This means that damaging mutations can’t be selected against and pushed out of the gene pool. “We can sequence huge amounts of information now – we can actually go and sequence asexual animals. We’ve done that to see what mutations they are accumulating – do any of them look bad? Obviously none of them are fatal because the animals look fine.”

Dr Aboobaker and his team plan to continue studying telomeres: “My prediction is actually that if you look at other related species they’ll all be using this mechanism… I also wanted to look more at the mechanisms that control telomere biology in planarians because I think they’ll be a good model for human telomere biology. There are some similarities – we have stem cells, they have stem cells.”

A civil obligation?

In light of the debate around implementing an 'opt-out' system, Rhona Auckland discusses the future of organ donation

THE BRITISH Medical Association’s plea for people to join the organ donor list has been reiterated with a new sense of urgency. Rekindling the debate surrounding organ donation, many are calling for joining ‘the list’ to become a legal obligation. Despite the number of donations having increased (a value of 34 per cent improvement is expected by April this year), we are still far from a figure likely to match the number of transplants required. It is all a horrible waiting game, but one which we have come to accept with a frightening lack of concern.

Each day in the US alone, 18 people die waiting for a new life-saving organ.

While this will come as no surprise to most people, how many have taken action to make a difference? Can those who choose not to register as donors really justify keeping their organs after

death, when they could be the difference between life and death for a helpless individual? Essentially, we are faced with the ultimatum of accepting this death list as a fact of life, or channelling our energy into finding new methods of encouraging people to donate.

paving the way to significantly increasing these numbers. Some have suggested an ‘opt-out' system where it is accepted that even if you haven’t signed up to the donor roll, you are still considered a donor unless you have stated otherwise. This seems like a quick, hassle-free option, but it is sure to bring controversy if protocols aren’t set up to determine with certainty Each day in the how a formal ‘opting out’ would work.

Furthermore, scientists are hoping US alone, 18 people that greater awareness could encourage die waiting for a new research into applying donor transplants to new areas of health. For example, life-saving organ. would it be possible to save someone How many have taken deemed clinically brain dead, with some form of transplant? Research published action to make a

by Harvard Medical School last November proved that certain forms of neuron difference?" transplants in mice had the ability to The Organ Donation Taskforce is repair brain defects and it is hoped that

“

this can be applied to diseases such as epilepsy, autism, Parkinson’s and Huntington’s. Using fluorescent markers, the transplanted neurons were successfully tracked and shown to develop normally in the specific systems tested, a method which has very positive implications for continuing this research in humans.

Similarly, researcher William Freed has also proved that neural transplants could solve the agony of those suffering from chronic diseases. By studying the adrenal medulla, it was found that neural transplants have shown signs of potential in positively reducing perceived pain, again highlighting the diverse possible applications for transplant research. Although the research is still in premature stages, the scientists involved are optimistic that further research could soon change the face of transplantation. But

will this be enough to change opinions and promote increased interest in the donor roll?

Others have suggested trying to increase the number of living donors, yet this idea is shot down by those distracted by the strain this could put on the national health service – each transplant would double the care required. Such moneydriven boffins have suggested bringing in a scheme where organs can be purchased like the latest Apple gadget. Yet, this is sure to open a bottomless can of ethicallymotivated worms. So for now the debate goes on, and it is likely to be months or even years before a resolution and the necessary action is achieved. However, in terms of science, at least comfort can be taken from the fact that the scientists behind transplantation research are continuing to move at a progressive pace.

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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Science & Environment 15

Saying a fond farewell

Olivia Macquire and Nina Seale reflect on the remarkable life of conservationist Lawrence Anthony

FIRM FRIENDS: Lawrence Anthony with Nik Barratt and Anthony's entire herd of elephants in Thula Thula LAWRENCE ANTHONY’S love for animals was truly unconditional. It led him to accept eight rogue elephants from a reserve in Northern South Africa into his reserve, Thula Thula, in the heart of the rugged Zulu bushlands. It took him to Baghdad in the midst of the American invasion to rescue the forgotten animals of Baghdad Zoo. It made him found the conservation and environmental non-profit Earth Organisation, which aims to improve the planet for all living species.

When Anthony received a distressing telephone call about a herd of troublesome elephants, he agreed to take them in in a heartbeat. His book The Elephant Whisperer reveals Anthony’s importance to South African conservation through detailed encounters with local Zulu chiefs and heated arguments with the Zulu community.

He managed to calm aggravated locals and cease land disputes, while caring for a growing herd of elephants and planning a new conservation scheme, The Royal Zulu Project, all without

batting an eyelid.

Amongst many conservation awards, Lawrence Anthony was recognised for his outstanding work in Baghdad. When the world’s media was fixated on the success of the American troops storming into Iraq, pulling down Saddam’s statues and ‘liberating’ the city, only Lawrence Anthony thought of the plight of the animals in Baghdad Zoo. Despite coverage to the contrary, the dust was very much unsettled in the capital, and Anthony found himself as the first overseas civilian to gain entry to Iraq, surrounded by hostile faces.

Baghdad Zoo is located in Al Zawra Park, right in the centre of the city and the site of the Battle of Baghdad, when Fedayeen Saddam troops took up defensive positions to fight the U.S. forces. When Anthony arrived, the abandoned zoo was in ruins. The surviving animals had been blinded by the bombs, pillaged by looters to be sold on the black market and some had escaped from their cages into the

warzone. “The place looked as if a tornado had hit it, then reversed and come back through again for good measure,” Anthony told Don Pinnock in his book Babylon’s Ark. “The street battle had gone right through the zoo and nobody had thought about the animals. An M1 tank had blown a hole in the wall of the lion enclosure.

There was a bear roaming round that had already killed three looters.”

“I could picture the horror the animals must have suffered, bullets ricocheting off their cages, turbineengined tanks roaring with their steel tracks ripping up roads, missiles whistling from the sky and cosmic-clapping bombs shredding buildings…”

But Anthony still persevered with what seemed an impossible task- saving the zoo. The pumps were broken, so the re-recruited zoo staff had to carry water from dams in the park.

There was no food for the workers, let alone the animals, so he had to comb the city for donkeys to feed to the carnivores.

Aliens in Antarctica

One of Anthony’s most outstanding qualities was his ability to charm people and recruit them to his cause.

As with the Zulus in his homeland, he managed to win over important figures in the US army, ordinary soldiers and local Iraqis to support his quest in saving the animals.

Yet for such a great man, Anthony was still a charming, considerate host in the lodge he ran at Thula Thula with his wife Francoise. His good friend and return guest Nik Barratt tells The Student, “Lawrence was the kind of man I wanted to be. He never lost his focus on what he wanted to achieve, or his sense of humour and was always more interested in your life than his own.”

What Lawrence Anthony gave to Africa is rare. There are few people who have died at 62 having accomplished as much with their lives as he did. His legacy lives on in the Zululands, the rich beauty of Thula Thula and the outstanding moral code it upholds to inspire conservationists worldwide.

Kieran Tierney discusses the problems caused by new species taking root in Antarctica RECENTLY THE Student looked at the research carried out by Antarctic scientists in their quest of finding life under the ice sheets, which could help in the search for alien life in our solar system. However, some scientists are becoming increasingly worried about alien species making a home on and around Antarctica itself.

Invasive animals and plants are being found on the fringes of the continent due in part to a warming climate and also to visiting scientists and tourists. Researchers took samples from visitors in summer 2007-2008 and have found that people are carrying on average 9.5 seeds each on their clothes, shoes and accessories into Antarctica, with scientists tending to bring more than tourists. Based on their results, the researchers have estimated that around 70,000 seeds arrived to Antarctica in that single summer. Since the 1960s this region has warmed by 3°C and the research team have said that the invaders could spread further as warming continues.

The invasion is not only taking place on land. King crabs, which can have a leg-span of up to a metre, have been

found in the Palmer Basin in the Antarctic Ocean. The species cannot inhabit water at less than 1.4°C and scientists believe they can only be surviving here due to the increasing sea temperature caused by global warming.

Why is this so important? There have been significant ecological changes on the islands in the sub-Antarctic region, such as South Georgia, due to invasive species. Steven Chown, the lead researcher of the team analysing the alien seeds, commented on the research saying, “Antarctica has a native ecology — a very well-established microbial ecology, and on the peninsula it has two species of indigenous plants. And it will be changed by species coming in.”

With global warming and the potential decrease in ice cover, Professor Chown thinks that Antarctica could end up looking like the sub-Antarctic islands, “South Georgia is a great sentinel of what could happen in the area in the next few hundred years.”

On the sea floor king crabs are generally at the top of the food chain, so by entering a new environment they are expected to have a large ecological impact. As the water temperature

increases with depth in this region, the crabs are currently confined below the continental shelf. Scientists have, however, found a large decrease in species diversity between the region above the crab dwelling zone and the zone the crabs inhabit, suggesting they may have already caused localised extinctions.

The continual increase of sea temperatures will endanger even more environments, as stressed by project leader Craig Smith, “If you look at the rate at which the seas are warming, (the continental shelf ) should be above 1.4°C within a couple of decades, so the crabs are likely then to come into shallower waters.”

Many examples of invasive species could be picked to highlight the danger they can cause to the natural wildlife.

In Britain there is the rhododendron, Japanese knotweed and the grey squirrel to name but three. This may mean that given our knowledge of these threats, there should be an obligation to try and protect Antarctica from these species, often remarked as being the last large ‘untouched’ wilderness left.

Steven Chown believes measures should be taken on the Antarctic conti-

NIK BARRATT

WE'VE GOT SPACE FOR SPACE

nent. “My suspicion is that if you didn’t take any biosecurity measures you’d end up with a system that would look like a weedy environment with rats, sparrows and Poa annua (a species of grass).”

This is, however, complicated by the fact that seeds can be blown by the wind from South America to Antarctica. In a warming world these seeds would naturally take root on Antarctica. Should we then differentiate between the plants which have been introduced by humans and those carried by the wind and only remove the former?

This would perhaps make sense in a naturally warming planet but of course this isn’t the case. It is only because of anthropogenic global warming that there is the potential for these species to spread across Antarctica. The same can be said for the spread of king crabs.

They could be removed by commercial fishing but the potential for them to return will always remain with higher sea temperatures.

The only real solution for the protection of Antarctica from invasion is to cut our carbon emissions. If we stop the warming trend it is not too late to protect existing natural environments.

LAST THURSDAY morning, a solar storm hit earth. Yes, that’s right, a SOLAR STORM. A huge bubble of charged particles came hurtling at our poor, unsuspecting planet at a speed of millions of kilometres an hour. All that actually happened was that a couple of GPS systems got a bit confused, but really, that’s beside the point. The point is that there’s a lot of scary goings-on in space but little we can do about it.

Take, for example, the terrifying concept of a black hole. Ted Bunn, associate professor of physics at the University of Richmond, neatly described black holes as “a region of space that has so much mass concentrated in it that there is no way for a nearby object to escape its gravitational pull.”

This means, fair reader, that there is NO WAY TO ESCAPE. If you get anywhere near one of those mad, dark areas of space that are lurking in the shadows simply waiting for you, you’re a gonner.

Why, you may ask, does this matter? Surely there’s no way that we’ll get anywhere near these mysterious, scary, Dr Who-like villains? Don’t get comfortable. In fact, there is a black hole in our own galaxy. Yes, the cosily-named Milky Way that kindly houses us does in fact have a supermassive black hole in its centre that wasn’t on the brochure when we paid our deposit. Or so the experts believe.

Take my advice, if the black hole tries to lure you in, just say no.

If you simply can’t resist its attractive charms, prepare for an unusual death caused by spaghettification.

This means that when you fall in, the gravity from the black hole keeps increasing. Eventually, it reaches a point where the difference between the gravity at your feet and your head is so large that you stretch until you’re ripped apart on an atomic level.

Lovely, isn’t it?

On the plus side, if someone watched your demise (from a VERY safe distance away) they’d see you falling until eventually you would stop and seem ‘frozen’ in space (even though technically you’re still falling in).

Now, don’t let my scaremongering put you off thinking about the wonders of the solar system. Really, there’s a lot out there that’s pretty fascinating, like the excitingly-named J1719-1438 which is a planet made of diamond, or WASP-17b which is a planet that’s half the mass of Jupiter, but twice its size (which means it’s really puffy). The more you learn, the more you’ll realise that there’s plenty of intriguing stuff out there… but just stay away from those darned black holes, alright?

Zoë Blah

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OLIVER NINNIS

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

A new chapter for games?

OLIVER NINNIS

Thom Louis shares his thoughts on the experimental story game Dear Esther DEAR ESTHER The Chinese Room PC £30

GAME MODIFICATIONS are like sandcastles: many spring up, but very few ever survive to completion, with most being given up on when the creator gets bored.

No More Room in Hell (NMRIH) sprung up as a zombie mod for Half Life 2 in the mid 2000s and has been in development ever since. Because of its lengthy development cycle many wrote it off dead years ago. As a result, NMRIH’s rise from the grave took many by surprise. The release last week of a new patch for the game which included a new game mode shows this undead modification won’t be decomposing any time soon.

No More Room in Hell is essentially a multiplayer game; sure you can play it alone but you’re missing out on what the experience is supposed to all be about- teamwork.

NMRIH’s two game modes reflect this, with one scenario requiring the players to complete objectives together and then escape, and another requiring you to band together and hold off wave upon wave of the undead. For a mod the game is incredibly fun and at times be somewhat scary.

Unfortunately, most of the time you’ll be hard pressed to find other players to play with. The fact that the mod is for a game as old as Half Life 2 works against it, with so few people still playing such old games.

This is fine as long as you can round up a party of friends for some skull cracking fun, but if you’re fancying a quick match then you might be hard pressed to find a game with other players.

Furthermore, for zombie games you want to really feel it when you hit that zombie in the face with an axe. In NMRIH the melee often feels lacklustre and more like you’re hitting balloons than brains.

No More Room in Hell as a product stands up to modern day competition and feels far more polished than a lot of games made by professional developers. For what is essentially a free game, and one which will be subject to further updates, NMRIH is definitely worth a try, it’s just a shame that so few people actually will. For me, I don’t know what’s more horrifying,the scenario of being cornered and eaten by flesh eating zombies, or the fact so many people will miss out on it.

Lewis Dunne

IT’S RARE to come across a game that is genuinely different. Whether for better or for worse the gaming industry is filled with levels of plagiarism that would be considered theft in any other media. Dear Esther is one of those special examples of gaming branching out, trying new things and challenging what we expect from the medium.

The experimental first person game started as a mod for Half Life 2 in 2007 and slowly evolved into its current, fully-realised form. Dear Esther is a touching ghost story set on a sparse Hebridean island. As the protagonist, you wander through this empty space while being related a touching, poetic love story taking the form of a letter in a bottle, as you discover new things on your travels. That is it. There are no baddies to kill here, nor roles to play, nor experience to grind. It is just you, a crushing story and an abandoned island, as you trudge your way to the incessant beacon in the distance.

“

These spaces are so well done it feels like you can smell the sea breeze on the air."

If one thing can be said about Dear

NOT EXACTLY MARIO BROTHERS: Dear Esther Esther's visual themes are more intropective than you might expect Esther, it is that it is gorgeous. Despite its age, the Source engine still creates some of the most diverse environments in gaming and this island is no exception. These spaces are so well done it feels like you can smell the sea breeze in the air, while the chapter (this feels relevant for once, as they are almost literally chapters) set in the island’s caves made my jaw drop to my knees with beauty. Alongside the dramatic natural setting are splattered patterns in blue paint: chemical symbols, bible passages and circuitry shrouded in mystery decorate the island’s walls.

This atmosphere is all augmented by

the gorgeous original soundtrack, with powerful strings and tinkling piano adding to Dear Esther’s melancholic feel.

It isn’t all perfect, however. Although the game has pretentions to exploration, it follows an obstinately linear path. The beautiful terrain is covered with invisible walls and blocked paths which the stunning vistas do not hint at. This gives limits to the game as it feels the story could have been wider, rather than setting you down one set road. At times trudging down a linear path does not provide enough entertainment to hold the game up as

a whole, no matter how much atmosphere is built up by the beautiful letter that frames the story. This is mostly solved by the reduced game time which is mercilessly cut down to no more than two hours.

Despite this, Dear Esther is a game that does something totally different.

Its focus on narrative was an experiment that needed to happen, especially at a time when games are trying to establish themselves as a storytelling medium. It is beautiful and brilliantly entertaining and does not need ammunition, swords or Nazi zombies to make it so.

Raspberry Pi in the sky

Kathryn MacPhail investigates the innovative Raspberry Pi computer WATCH OUT Apple, there’s a new fruit on the market. Called the Raspberry Pi, Dr Eben Upton has created a credit-card-sized computer retailing for just £22. The device is intended to give the target market, children, the opportunity to learn to program.

For six years Upton has been thinking on and planning this new small and cheap computer. His primary goal is to provide every child in Britain with their own Raspberry Pi. Upton himself has said, “It’s about giving kids access to an opportunity that I know has helped me have a more pleasant life…I don’t understand why everyone doesn’t want to be an engineer, because you get to play with cool guys and they pay you for it.”

Complex, this computer is not. It is simplistic in its form; just picture a small green circuit board. It has numerous features that are appealing to the public. For instance, it is really

low powered, completely silent and has a surprisingly comprehensive set of interfaces that allow you to connect to other electronic components. To set up, just plug in your monitor, keyboard and mouse into the two USB ports, insert an SD-card which contains the operating system and applications, then plug in the power- a standard micro USB adapter. It normally takes about 15 seconds to boot. Easy peasy.

“

Users are able to create graphical games and stories using the Pi's included programming tools."

When fully loaded the logo of Pi appears on the screen, funnily enough, it’s an image of a raspberry. Users

are able to create graphical games and stories using the Pi’s included programming tools – a nice way of letting people learn how to program in an irritation free environment. There is even a graphics processor on the chip at the heart of the Pi enabling the device to produce high quality graphics output; it can even run full HD video. All whilst dissipating one or two watts.

It will be available for £22 (not including VAT), a great price for children. Just a few weeks pocket money’s worth, really. No surprise then that demand is high. The low price was achieved through a combination of good will and sensible design choices; all the included software is opensource, the chip manufacturers sold their components at a reduced rate and everyone involved on the project gave their time and money for free.

Plus, the money made from profits will be used towards improvements

KONGREGATE

 NO MORE ROOM IN HELL

of the Pi and to further encourage children to learn how to program.

The Royal Society last month pinpointed a sixty per cent decline in the number of British students achieving an A-level in computing since 2003. Ultimately, this device seems like a great way to resolve the ostensibly mournful state of Britain’s computer science syllabus. “We just want to get kids programming. The goal here is to increase the number of children to apply to university to do computer science, and to increase the range of things they know how to do when they arrive.” So of course, having nearly the same functionality as a conventional computer, including running HD video, as well as a plethora of programming tools, it’s not surprising that the device sold out within minutes of becoming available last month. Hopefully, the microcomputer will ins-Pi-re the next generation of programmers.

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Contact: editors.studentnewspaper@gmail.com

18 Crossword

Oliver ninnis

S

E OP

C

S O OR

H Paranoid Percy Parrot is a massive psychonaut, testing legal highs for MI5. He took too much miaow-miaow and now he’s paranoid that there may be a mole in the secret service! On the other hand, he’s totally baked and can see the future through a misty haze of Cowgate Cannabis, Leith Lollapalooza and Musselburgh Mellow.

Aries

This week you decide it would be quite a lark to stand as a candidate for president of EUSA. You look at previous successful campaigns, bundle together some photoshopped pictures of you looking angry outside various university buildings and promise a 24 hour library. You can always blame it on the moon if election promises fall by the wayside.

Taurus

Bananas, eh? What are they like?!

One minute they're sitting on the table, all like 'don't mind me,' next minute they're all up in your grill like, 'DON'T PUT ME IN YOUR GRILL!!'

Gemini

For Mothers’ Day, you decide to grow flowers rather than buy them (it’s cheaper, but she'll think you've 'made a special effort'.) However, you’ve left it rather late and all you have time to grow is watercress. You hope she will be happy with this. She isn’t and you are swiftly disinherited. There goes the family silver and any chance of chatting up Fiona Bruce on antiques roadshow...

Cancer

This week, you retire from your high profile sabbatical position in EUSA politikz after an embarrassing aspyhxiation-masturbation scandal.

Leo

On Mars' advice, you mangle your dominant hand in a sinister chicken basting/asphyxisexual incident. Pass the disability office and collect £200 (plus a shiny new laptop with voice recognition). Shame your vocal cords are now eroded by boiling chicken fat/ semen (delete as appropriate).

Virgo

This week, you finally buy a pastel suit.

The ladies are swept off their feet by your particular ‘luetic’ charm (look it up). And your enormous, greasy ball warts.

Libra

This week you buy a pair of brogues just to prove to everybody what an edgy bastard you are. It succeeds.

Everyone on campus is now wary of you, as you look like a cross between Clint Eastwood and Ronald Reagan.

You become a Republican presidential candidate for the United States and tell Mitt Romney exactly where to go (back to Massachusetts the liberal douche bag).

Scorpio

This week you are going to have an Orange Wednesday. When walking down George IV Bridge you will come across a lady bedecked in shawls who will invite you into her tango parlour.

As she removes your clothes, she will creepily, but accurately whistle Earth Wind & Fire’s 1981 hit, “Evolution Orange”. She will proceed to bronze you, focusing only on the area around your mouth. You leave, delighted with the semi-permanent post-bolognaisestyle orange stain on your chin and upper lip.

Sagittarius

On Saturday you dazzle the big cheese with your box step - truly the greatest dance manoeuvre of all time. Beware of over literal interpretations this week however. A box stepping on you is not a trivial event for anyone.

Capricorn

Crikey Moses! While writing your dissertation, you finally run out of verbs.

It was only a matter of time. You have no idea what to do about this. 'US Cold War Russia bad.'

Aquarius

Don't rush things this week, potatoes are meant to take that long to cook and Barry had a difficult childhood.

Pisces

Dual Crossword No. 10

As you know, to prevent a double dip recession, cross reference your body clock with your metaphor meter, simile star and alliteration alligator - easy.

BY PICUS

CRYPTIC CLUES

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

Across

1 Mr Carson’s wee ferret (3) 3 Tough timber Dora has to hew, clumsily (9) 8 Batting at this point in time, and this situation helps nobody (2-3) 9 Greatly affected (and slightly mad), Edward admits it hurts (7) 10 Macho CIC eats this - under cover ? (4-3) 11 There’s tar on the edge, about to spill (5) 13 Tim eats hat (with bay), minced up all the same (2, 4, 2, 2, 3) 16 Chambers in Cicero’s house - and his heart (5) 18 The loan’s gone pear-shaped. It’s something in the drink (7) 20 Ceremonial exit oddly observed by one in buried city (7) 21 I’m right in the goulash - so scatter ! (5) 22 Tory means to dissolve religious community (9)

Down

8

9

10

11

13

16

15

14

17

20

22

12

18

19

21

23

1 Family needs good commander (and support), to find large reptile (4, 5) 2 A tug : scilicet another snake CONCISE CLUES (same answers) usurps Kim’s heart (3, 4) 3 Rubbing noses with Across Down Honorary Soldier (5) 1 Clothing, equipment (3) 1 Big hooded snake (4, 5) 4 On the other hand Tim eats meat 3 Inner part of tree trunk (9) 2 A tug (3, 4) he minced any old how (2, 3, 4, 4) 8 Lose-lose (2-3) 3 Maori greeting (5) 5 A big wave from the Northern 9 Slightly mad (7) 4 On the other hand (2, 3, 4, 4) star, and French pal (7) 10 Ice cream covered 5 Tidal wave (7) 6 Work on short lease for that 6 “Quinquireme of Nineveh in chocolate (4-3) “haven in sunny Palestine” (5) 11 About to overflow (5) from distant …..” (5) 7 It’s no good running up and down (3) 13 On the other hand (2, 4, 2, 2, 3) 7 No good, counterfeit (3) 12 She landed at New Plymouth, 16 Roman hallways (5) 12 Pilgrim Fathers’ ship (9) with hawthorn blossom (9) 18 Alcohol (7) 14 Mozart’s middle name (7) 14 Wolfgang’s successor - made in Oz ! (7) 20 City lost under volcanic ash (7) 15 Mosque tower (7) 15 Mosque tower where a lot of 17 Mr Abramovich 21 Scatter (5) money conceals rising age (7) 22 Where monks live (9) (to his friends) (5) 17 Fellow countryman imprisoned 23 Hill (3) 19 Impertinent girl (5)

by Mauro Mandolucci ? (5) 19 She may be shy, romping round The Chambers Dictionary (2008) is recommended America - but it’s unlikely (5) 20 Lord Palmerston’s wee lassie (3)

Solutions to Dual Crossword No. 9 Across 1 NARROW SQUEAKS N + arrow + squeaks

8 NUN contained, palindrome green underwear 9 TRAVELLER Teller round rav (e) 10 ALIBI (bail I)* 11 HANDS ON H + and son (& = and) 13 DUTCH AUCTIONS Dutch + actions round (Timbukt) U 15 IRKUTSK 1 + Turks* + k 17 ULTRA contained Mogul Tradition

A bit about cryptic clues

So far we’ve said that Cryptic clues contain a definition of the answer plus “extra material” which gives the same answer by a different route. You no longer need to cross-check with other clues because a Cryptic clue has its own internal cross-check. Two examples from Puzzle 10 (up the page):20 ac. Ceremonial exit oddly observed by one in buried city (7).

The definition is “buried city”.

All the rest is our “extra material”.

“Ceremonial” = POMP. “exit oddly” means < take the odd let-

19 TREADMILL T + read + Mill ( John Stuart Mill 1806 - 73) 21 MAY 3 definitions 22 ROLLING STONES… gather no moss Down 1 NINJA N + ( Jan, I)* 2 RUN RIOT run + riot (revelry) 3 OUT WITH IT Out and ‘ with it ‘ 4 SWASHBUCKLING (W in sash) + buck + (Stir) ling (cf buck the trend) 5 USE E under US 6 ATLAS at + las (s) (at - nagging) ters of “exit” > : E, I. “observed by” means < all this goes beside > “one” - usually the letter “ I ”.

This gives POMP + E, I + I (POMPEII).

19 dn. She may be shy, romping round America - but it’s unlikely (5).

Definition : “She” (a female entity of some sort). “shy” is material to use (fodder). “romping” , an anagram indicator meaning < re-arrange the letters of “shy” >. “round” is another indicator meaning

Comments, questions, complaints etc can reach the compiler via the editors

7 SARONGS (p) rong in SAS 12 NUT CUTLET Nut + cult* + et (Fr) 13 DRIFTER [tried +F (athe) R]* 14 OTTOMAN OT + to + man (valet) (cf ‘ take to wife’) 16 KNELL “Nell” 18 ABYSS Bass* round Y 20 DAI contained Dadaism * = anagram of the preceding material “ …. “ the word in the clue and the word used (as material) for the answer are homophones

< put these re-arranged letters around what follows >.

“America” = US. “but it’s unlikely” means < “She” is unlikely to be “shy” >.

So :- SHY (anagram) round US (HUSSY).

These are all < Composite or Kebab > clues (the most frequent type), where the “extra material” contains material to be used (fodder) and indicators that tell us what to do with it.

Next week more on indicators, and some anagrams.

rEVIEW rEVIEW COMMISSION #21: liam walker

Liam Walker is a 4th year BA Drawing and Painting student. He utilises his work to tell stories, express desires and narrate certain situations. While these subjects are often personal, Walker obscures them with absurd or comic imagery, provoking the viewer to interpret the work as they understand it personally. His influences derive from cartoons, newspaper crosswords, the Ealing comedies from the 1950s and folk stories. Walker often places his work close together so that they resemble a comic strip or a storyboard.

Follow us on twitter @TheStudentPaper or on Facebook at facebook.com/TheStudentNewspaper culture.thestudent@gmail.com

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

HOLLY JAMESON

20Culture 1

Knockout comedy

Think comedy in Edinburgh is nothing outside the Festival weeks? Thom Louis has news for you e have to think ourselves lucky when it comes to comedy in Edinburgh. Let’s be honest, it isn’t every city that has the privilege to host the world’s biggest and most successful comedy festival. During August we play host to, almost literally, all of the big names on the circuit. After all of that excitement during the Fringe, Edinburgh’s comedy scene can seem rather empty and a little too quiet for comfort. Certainly, The Stand is good enough to play host to some skilled circuit staples and there is always a cheap, if not always great, stand up set to fill the void but it is nothing compared to the buzz or the volume that is around during the festival.

However, all is not lost. Thanks to University of Edinburgh student Rosalind Romer, the city is being treated to some of the biggest names on the circuit. This Thursday, Punchline comedy, a new and massive Edinburgh comedy night, is playing Usher Hall. Not only does this hall provide a massive venue but it brings with it some huge comedy names. Multi-award winning Andrew

Lawrence is headlining the night and with so many festivals under his belt and fresh from his recent appearance on Live at the Apollo he provides an exciting top of the listings. Romer describes him as a “dark and edgy” comic but his mainstream appeal has brought him massive festival crowds and huge critical acclaim. This is particularly true of his last six fringes, where he has bought a new show every year.

Next on the list is Seann Walsh, who has been all over the small screen in the last year. Holding panel positions on Dave’s Argumental and appearing on everything from Mock the Week to McIntyre’s Comedy Roadshow, Walsh’s observational style goes a long way in any room.

It’s not just stand up at Punchline, and sketch group Idiots of Ants are also on the line up. This dynamic sketch comedy group are a Fringe favourite and winner of both the Chortle awards and Edinburgh Comedy Award nominee and are bound to provide a great amount of variety to the evening.

Veteran compere Mark Olver is acting

as the night’s master of ceremonies, looking forward to “Scottish Audiences [which] have a little oomph to them” and know “the best acts in the country”.

Punchline will bring club sets to a massive Edinburgh venue, giving some of us a chance to get a feel for the furore of the Fringe in the middle of March.

Punchline is playing Usher Hall on Thursday 15th March.

MOMUS

about a hundred times throughout his performance. Surprisingly however, rather than irritating me, it just made me laugh all the more; especially at his first mention of “the ghost of Sir Walter Scott's ego” which was the culprit of his feelings of inadequacy. Why did he feel insufficient you may ask? Momus solemnly told the audience, “The ghost of Sir Walter Scott's ego had sex with my wife.”

If that wasn’t obscenely funny enough, he layered his whole performance with ironic admiration of the man, statue and again, “the ghost of his ego”. At one point he got the audience to peer out of a window, pointing to imaginary figures and drawing us further into his world of pure lunacy.

In an attempt to make sense of the sometimes nonsensical performance, I took his message to be that relating to the unnecessary hype surrounding certain things, we are easily influenced into believing things are better than they are simply because other seemingly important people tell us so. So in short, “stick it to the man”. He tells us creativity is essentially evil (if this was a survey, I’d say 'strongly disagree') and that we should be prepared “to search to the ego of Sir Walter Scott’s ghost.”

This night was just one in a chain of performances set up by curator Ross Christie, which are planned to continue until 7 June. If you can’t make them all, try to catch at least one. It’s definitely a strangely enjoyable experience in a guilty pleasure type of way.

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ccentric and outrageous are certainly two words that describe Momus – the alter ego of artist, musician and writer Nick Currie. Using the upper rooms of Edinburgh Printmakers as a stage, with Kirsty Whiten’s somewhat grotesque prints perched on the walls, Currie built a hilarious improvised performance. Reacting to the surroundings, building and history of Edinburgh Printmakers, Currie created a new work in this absurd context, with nude animalistic-looking human families occupying the gallery interior.

He could have been Trimalchio in Petronius’s Satyricon, expect for his 18th century pauper-like attire complete with eye-patch. By the first minute of Momus speaking, I set the cup of apple juice I was given upon entering on the floor and fell into a fit of uncontrollable laughter. Inciting us with a distorted version of history, imagined future civilizations and landscapes, he gave our abs a workout. He may have said Sir Walter Scott’s name

THE JOLLY PILGRIM

By Peter Baker £10.99

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DANIELLE MALINEN

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think everyone knows the feeling which compelled Peter Baker to write The Jolly Pilgrim. That feeling when you stand by yourself, looking from a distance on the ant-sized lights of civilisation, and find yourself looking at the big picture. Contemplating all of humanity’s petty struggles in a greater context of millenia and thinking that people don’t have it so bad after all.

Now consider that first paragraph.

The Student is offering the chance to win a pair of tickets to Punchline. Simply email the answer to this question to: culture.thestudent@gmail.com When did Seann Walsh win the Chortle Comedy Award for Best Newcomer?

A) 2008 B) 2009 C) 2010

WHO ARE YOU CALLING ANTS?: Idiots of Ants offended

Mary Kamel

HMS PINAFORE Pleasance Theatre Run ended

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efore last night, I was in a complete blank about Gilbert and Sullivan.

I had never heard of them and knew nothing about what I was in for. I didn’t know it was going to be so absurdly silly, predictable, cliched… and irresistibly funny. The plot is by no means intriguing: the focal point is the scandalous interclass love between Ralph, a sailor of the Pinafore, and the Captain’s daughter, whose father promised her in marriage to Sir Joseph, the “dummy,” honourable and pompous ruler of the Queen’s Navy.

The constraints of etiquette and rank stand in the way of true feelings, but in the end all is solved with an absurd If it fuelled a kindred spark of inspiration in you, then Baker’s book is a must-read. If it made you faintly nauseous at the glibness of the self-styled oracle, then The Jolly Pilgrim will make you feel exactly the same.

The book is a clunky blend of travelogue and – brace yourself – “global musings” on the human condition.

The former is lightly engaging, a merrily inconsequential account of Baker’s two year trip around the world.

He crosses Europe by bicycle, explores Cambodia on foot and hitchhikes the east coast of Australia, before winding up in South America. Along the way he encounters mosquito bites and border police, meets countless incidental characters whose names

revelation involving misplaced babies and unsuspected noble origins.

There is not much going on, really.

What made Edinburgh University Savoy Opera Group's (EUSOG) production truly entertaining was the genuine, contagious enthusiasm of the whole cast. Amazing voices rendered 1878 saccharin songs worthy of being heard. The tunes carried away the audience in an over-sentimental ambience, where every tiny trouble is a good pretext for pouring your heart out musically.

“

The characters' patriotism was so old fashioned it called for roaring laughter, especially among the older members of the audience."

Emma Middleton as Josephine really blew scepticism out of any hard to please spectators and Luka Bjelis as Sir Joseph was as good a caricature of an English parvenu as anyone keen for laughter could ask for. For Matthew Gibbons as Ralph, some high tones were out of reach, but overall both the you’ll instantly forget and talks to his bicycle.

But it is the interspersed “musings” which offer both the book’s best moments and its weakest. Baker has a “thesis” on mankind, which he is all too eager to unload onto the reader.

At its best, this is genuinely insightful. He has a knack for taking the long view, arguing convincingly that we are still negotiating the transition from hunter-gatherer to a sedentary agricultural society.

Elsewhere, though, he is inconsistent – he refutes “great men”-oriented history, yet often produces it – or is downright preachy. It’s difficult to present an anthropological stance without lapsing into prescriptivism

BEX COLLWEL PR

W

acting and singing performances were capital. And the dancing! My favourite moment was when the ship’s crew and ladies huddled, moving as one man with miraculous coordination. Choreography was well rehearsed and just cheesy enough to make the audience smile.

Good timing was essential; the band never missed a cue, the actors were always on time, and the spotlights were prompt and enhanced the (already stressed) sentimentality.

The Englishness of it all was overbearing: the whole theatre was lit up and decorated in red, white and blue, with an abundance of union Jacks poking out from every corner. The characters’ patriotism was so old fashioned it called for roaring laughter, especially amongst the older members of the audience who were present for some decidedly English humour.

If I were to describe Gilbert and Sullivan’s operettas to a complete layperson like I was before last night, I would use the words giddy, predictable and satirically nationalistic. Then I would recommend EUSOG, who should initiate you to this nonsensical, harmless and very English fun.

Paola Tamma and Baker doesn’t jump the trap.

He seems smug and convinced that he knows best. Other techniques irritate too; his theology, for example, is atheism needlessly sugar-coated with soft-focus spiritualism without much justification. This constant flow between genuine insight and genuine bullshit makes The Jolly Pilgrim an infuriating read.

Which doesn’t make it not worth reading. On the contrary, I recommend it heartily: if travel and sociology intrigue you, Baker’s work is certainly worth the read – but open it prepared to disagree.

Aran Ward Sell

Follow us on twitter @TheStudentPaper or on Facebook at facebook.com/TheStudentNewspaper culture.thestudent@gmail.com

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Culture 21

STAR RATING Wat-er success Splashing out Getting into the swim of things Utter piddle Ab-torrent

Diving into a pool of stars

ROYGBIV

This week's cultural spectrum.

A

Andrea Yew is stunned by gods, men and love at Bedlam Theatre's Metamorphoses Bedlam Theatre Run Ended

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tale of loves lost, lovers reunited, of follies of gods and men, Zimmerman has created an arrestingly beautiful play based on Ovid’s Metamorphoses. It invites us to become the audience in the theatre of gods and men. And although these are largely their tales, the fact that we can almost touch the actors places us on a level with the gods and invites us to relate to their stories.

The dazzling set of overhanging lights- like stars in the night sky, shimmering over a pool of water, soft folk music in the background- creates a truly magical experience as the audience settles in and gathers around, listening to a tale telling of the creation of the world. The fact that the entire play takes place in a pool of water is an exquisite touch that heightens the intensity of the experience. It is a wonderful

THE 12 ROYAL ACADEMIANS The Scottish Gallery 'til 31st March

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

espite comprising of 12 completely unique artists, The Twelve Royal Academicians exhibition possesses a dynamic, vibrant and tastefully coherent character. What struck me most was how I could immediately identify several of the artists’ influences; once again reminding me that everything in the world of art is inextricably interlinked.

One of the artists that caught my attention was Eileen Cooper, whose vibrant colours, distinct impasto

MIHAELA BODLOVIC

“

The dazzling set of overhanging lights- like stars in the night sky, shimmering over a pool of water, soft folk music in the backgroundcreates a truly magical experience."

COULD SOMEONE TURN THE BUBBLES ON?: Silenus relaxes in Metamorphoses' pool aural and visual accompaniment to the performance, as we watch Erysichthon (Steven Kirschbaum) desperately splashing about, trying to satisfy an insatiable hunger or the naked, silent intimacy between Eros (Fred Fergus) and Psyche (Rose Paxman).

The brilliance of this production must be credited to the actors’ superb presentation of the characters. The cast makes the stories of gods, seemingly so

far removed from us mere mortals, relatable. We laugh at Andrew Edwards’ hilarious portrayal of the bumbling, shy Vertumnus and at Craig Methven’s cheekily presented Phaeton. Although admittedly there are moments which do not quite capture all the intensity or emotion of the scene. For instance, when Midas (Will Naameh) realizes the folly of his wish , we do not fully feel the depth of his despair. This is

through no fault of the actors, but time constraints given the difficulty of telling ten stories within an hour and a half.

One of the most beautiful productions I have ever seen, EUTC’s Metamorphoses will leave its audience breathless with wonder,breaking hearts and gently piecing them back together again- a perfect illustration of the magic of theatre.

and indigenous subjects instantly reminded me of Gauguin’s work during his escape in Tahiti. Perhaps not as Primitivistic as Gauguin, Cooper’s work portrays tender interaction between people as well as moments of individual joy, often with more than one imaginary scenario occurring within one composition.

Another artist with a particularly energetic choice of colour was Abstractionist John Hoyland. The most prominent of his exhibited works was “Jade Lake”. I would argue that Hoyland’s choice of colours was unfortunate. The background consists of a truly stunning and evocative translucent green. However, this is not in accord with the splotches of solid neon reds, yellows and blues that are,

fruitlessly included in the foreground.

This may have been intended as a very direct message suggesting the disturbing effects of pollution.

for transmitting the truth. His works are careful amalgamations of contemporary metaphors and allusions. Orr is the perfect artist for anybody who loves the intellectual challenge often implicit in art.

The rest of the exhibition included etchings, watercolour paintings and even an assemblage of safety matches and wood glue that resulted in a seamless portrayal of Betty Boop. I acquired mixed impressions about the individual artists. However, I found that the aim of creating a tasteful compilation of works by some of the biggest names in contemporary British art was quite successfully executed in this exhibition.

“

Eileen Cooper, whose vibrant colours, distinct impasto and indigenous subjects instantly reminded me of Gaugin's work."

It was impossible not notice the incredibly busy lithographs of Chris Orr, who evidently invites his viewers to truly ‘read’ into his art. Orr considers the fantastical and peculiar as vehicles

Maria Kheyfets

THE POETRY DOCTOR with Isabella Flanders things you truly value. Once you get good at this, your money worries will seem far less significant.

Not that I’m advocating living with your head in the clouds. Lofty poetic ideals are important, but so are nachos, so don’t beat yourself up too much. Everyone needs to eat, as Robert Herrick pragmatically points out in “Upon Jack and Jill: Epigram”: “Let poets feed on air or what they will;/ Let me feed full till that I fart, says Jill.”

Got a problem? We can cure you! All problems will be treated confidentially. And ever so seriously. Email us at artdoctor.thestudent@gmail.com.

The Traverse are playing host to a producion of the timeless Antigone, promising to give a fresh spin to the classic play, running 'til 17th March.

The Edinburgh Pinhole Photography Festival is running workshops and exhibitions at the Royal Botanic Gardens 'til 17th March.

The Open Eye Gallery exhibitions begins this week, 'til 28th March.

HOLLY JAMESON

When I first read this, I wondered how you could have had the audacity to intrude on my blissful poetic sphere with your grubby little materialistic problems. Had you ever opened a poetry book before, you’d know that life is about higher spiritual satisfaction.

If you really want my advice, you’ll

quit the Teviot lunches and nourish your soul instead. Preoccupied with financial flimflam, you are missing the opportunity to be enriched by the world around you. Poets, who rarely make that much money anyway, get plenty of practice at distracting themselves from the unavoidable realities of life. W.B. Yeats, when he felt stressed by the ever-so-slightly challenging problem of Irish independence, went to his inner happy place, “The Lake Isle of Innisfree”. In his fantasy of that “bee-loud glade”, he dreams of building a life free from care.

We can never really escape from our problems, but to avoid being overwhelmed by them, remember the

Troy Holmes

Look oot for...

This week: Spiritual satisfaction, flimflam and the importance of nachos Dear Poetry Doctor, I keep throwing money away on small purchases that I don’t really need and then I never have enough for the big things. Last week I had Teviot nachos three times for lunch and then I felt so guilty that I turned down going to a gig I really wanted to see.

How do I sort out my spending so I’ll be able to afford everything I want?

Ye olde baby got back website that has recently been brought to our collective attention is that of Anna Utopia Giordano, an artist who takes nude Renaissance masterpieces and, using photoshop, reduces the size of each woman to reflect modern standards of beauty and size. It's specifically aimed towards the fashion and magazine industries, where dangerously thin is the only route to beauty. As a History of Art student, I’m used to seeing fleshy Renaissance paintings of large, beautiful women. As a society, we admire and venerate them for their ‘real life’ bodies. But do we really practice what we preach? Just as thousands of women say that they aspire to Marylin Monroe's achievable figure, how many of them are currently nibbling on a celery stick, looking forward to cabbage soup for tea and professing constantly that they need to loose five pounds?

It’s shocking to consider how attitudes have changed, even in the last 50 years, as documented by Jean Kilbourne in her video lecture series ‘Killing Us Softly’ that follows trends through advertising that encourage impossible body shapes while sexualising women and girls. If you've ever seen images of celebrities and models before they've been edited, it becomes blatantly obvious that images that are used to sell us cosmetics and clothes create unachievable goals. The edited paintings ask us to take a step back and question the images we are constantly bombarded with by the media. Scrolling through the images of scaled down waists and bony hips, their bodies strike you as odd in the context of a Renaissance masterpiece, but in women’s magazines that poke fun at celebrities with a roll of flesh around their middle, it's accepted as standard.

It's worrying to consider how our concepts of beauty differ so widely to those of the past. Is it a wonder that more and more women are suffering from eating disorders, body dysmorphia and low self-esteem? After editing, Botticelli’s once bootylicious “Birth of Venus” looks as though she’s been on a drastic crash diet of raw radishes and Slim Fast powdered milkshakes. Personally, the voluptuous curves of Hayez’s “Venus”, who has a touch of bum-meets-thigh cellulite, is far more attractive than her skinnier photoshopped sister image.

Take a look and decide for yourself, which version of the paintings do you find most beautiful?

Edinburgh Homelessness Project have curated a collection of artwork exhibited at St John's Church 'til 22 March.

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

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JOANNA LISOWIEC

1 Film

Is the film industry racist?

Kirsty Wareing asks why there are still so few roles for non-white actors in Hollywood

the Academy Awards in 2011, the event was not so much a disaster, as an uninspired and transparent attempt by the Academy to appeal to a younger demographic. This year, the organisers decided to address this problem by falling back on an old favourite. Billy Crystal, who has now presented the ceremony nine times, is the Oscars incarnate: old time Hollywood singing and dancing, chummy familiarity with the inner circle who has the opening parody montage down to an art. Unfortunately, it was also a return to some of Hollywood’s less attractive older ‘qualities’; that is, a reliance on lazy racial slurs, dressing up in blackface and even an ill-advised fat joke aimed at Jonah Hill.

Whilst there has been some debate over whether Crystal impersonating Sammy Davis Jr. can unequivocally be labelled as blackface, it is nonetheless a reminder of the American film industry’s tainted past. Movies that are still considered classics such as Breakfast at Tiffany’s will forever be tarnished by the unjustifiable fashion of white actors representing other ethnicities in an offensive manner. Mickey Rooney’s Mr. Yunioshi is an absolute train-wreck, one that might well have been avoided by the studio actually casting the role to a Japanese American. What needs to be asked now, however, is how much things have changed since that heartwarming escapist tale about a free-spirited prostitute living the American Dream in Givenchy.

PUT A BIRD ON IT: The costume designer had taken Jack Sparrow's name a little too literally Last Thursday, a photo of Johnny Depp as Tonto in The Lone Ranger was tweeted by Jerry Bruckheimer. Depp has staked his claim to the role by asserting his Native American heritage.

Well, sort of: “I guess I have some Native American (in me) somewhere down the line. My great grandmother was quite a bit of Native American, she grew up Cherokee or maybe Creek Indian”, he told EW.com. Whilst Johnny doesn’t sound too certain about his ancestry, one can’t help but wonder

where Hollywood’s Native American actors are and just how many were at all considered for the part. The issue here is not about Depp’s performance being racist as such, since until the film’s release there can be nothing but speculation - although one hopes the screenwriters have done away with the traditionally Tonto pidgin speak. Rather, it illustrates a wider problem in the mainstream movie business. Where are all the actors from visible minorities?

The casting of roles seems to be

in a vicious cycle: as long as they keep going to the bigger names, they are not available to ethnic minorities, who inevitably get pigeonholed into less exciting and challenging supporting parts. This then makes the film industry less and less appealing to these talented individuals. Dev Patel, star of the Oscar winning Slumdog Millionaire, has publically challenged the lack of meaty parts for actors of Asian descent and if he doesn’t have opportunities presented to him beyond “the roles of a terror-

BEL AMI

HOUSE OF TOLERANCE

DIRECTED BY DECLAN DONNELLAN AND NICK ORMEROD 

DIRECTED BY BERTRAND BONELLO 

oor old R-Pattz. It seems that no P matter how hard he tries to break the mould and prove himself as an actor, he is

LADIES IN WAITING: Who's Bella again? problem is, however, that the reason why we find ourselves appreciating the attractiveness of the film is that we are bored and disconnected from a slow-moving script and lacklustre plot.

The film just doesn’t seem to go anywhere- with no real twists, turns or character development. Duroy is essentially a dull character and as a result of the poor storytelling, the audience find themselves caring very little about what happens to him.

By a long way, the best element of the film is the three female characters played

by Uma Thurman, Kristin Scott Thomas and Christina Ricci. Each of the female

TWI-STAR

destined to remain forever in the shadow of a certain sparkly vampire. With just a quick glance at the reviews of costume drama Bel Ami, it is rather tiresome to see almost every critic relishing the opportunity to make a vampire joke and sneer at Pattinson’s acting ability. No wonder he always looks so broody.

The alarming truth of the matter is that, behind the critics’ disdain and the teen heartthrob reputation, Pattinson has the makings of a perfectly decent actor. In present circumstances, however, this revelation is no cause for celebration because despite Pattinson’s perfectly adequate performance, Bel Ami is not a good film.

Bel Ami is an adaption of an 1885 French novel and tells the story of Georges Duroy, a charming but manipulative social climber who uses his relationships with women to gain power and wealth.

It is clear when watching the film that a great deal of effort has been spent on making it look as sumptuous as possible and, as a result, the costumes and set-design in Bel Ami really are impressive. The

ith captivating visuals like a W Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec painting, award winning Bertrard

leads does their absolute best with the rather uninspiring material. Special credit, however, must be given to Ricci who is dazzling and believable as Clotilde.

Bel Ami had the potential to be a good film. The cast are impressive and the story’s basic premise is a good one.

One only wishes that the film’s directors and production team paid more attention to plot development and script and less to costumes and upholstery.

Sally Pugh Reviewed at Cineworld

Bonello’s latest film House of Tolerance is set at the turn of 19th century, depicting the lives of courtesans at L’apollonide in its final days. Unlike its glitzier sister film Moulin Rouge, House of Tolerance has all the despair, but less of the glamour and glitter. Although a little cliché at times with its portrayal of the quintessential French courtesan, all lace, rouge and blood red lips, House of Tolerance is gorgeously poignant. It has the sorrow of stale cigarettes and champagne and of perfume to hide the smell of sex. Set against a soundtrack ranging from blues to Puccini, it gives the film a wonderfully sad, beautiful elegance.

At times, the film makes our stomachs turn and our hearts wrench at the same time with its portrayal of the violence that can go on at L’apollonide.

We watch, horrified and yet unable to look away, as a client slits the cheeks of a tied up Madeline, one of the courtesans, leaving her screaming, choking on her own blood. At L’apollonide, where the women are subject to their

ZANNALAND

here seemed to be a universal T agreement that when Anne Hathaway and James Franco co-presented

ist, cab driver and smart geek”, then who does? This month saw the release of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, a British Orientalist vision, depicting smiling, obliging Indians hosting the best of British acting royalty on their quest for inner peace and harmony.

It’s yet another ‘feast for the senses’ in the vein of Eat Pray Love and Patel is woefully marginal in his role as the bumbling, inept and apologetic hotel manager. Patel’s girlfriend Freida Pinto currently stars in Trishna, a Tess of the D’urbervilles relocated to India. As the title character, Pinto spends most of the trailer alternating between looking morosely lost and dancing ecstatically.

This India, one of perpetual chaos and contradiction, appears to be the only story that Western filmmakers feel the need to tell.

The film industry needs to acknowledge that it not only reflects culture, but shapes it too. In some ways this can be a positive thing, but when it comes to the inclusion and exploration of much beyond western white culture, it is consistently found wanting. When Billy Crystal made his joke about travelling 45 minutes from Beverly Hills to hug a black woman after watching The Help, he seemed outrageously out of touch.

Yet whilst it is evident that there are black women working and living in Hollywood, when one of the biggest films of 2011 - a story about racism, in which a white woman empowers black maids to overcome their oppression - is held up as evidence that Hollywood is no longer racist, it is clear that there is so much further we need to go. clients’ darkest, strangest desires and the constant threat of disease and violence looms, losing one’s heart is the least of their worries.

While at times, the film can seem a little directionless, with its lack of a solid plot, it echoes the uncertainty the girls face once L’apollonide closes down and the miasma of pointlessness that dogs their days. Perhaps in a desperate attempt to find meaning in what they do, one of the courtesans heartbreakingly remarks, “ If we don’t burn, how will we light up the night?”

“

the soundtrack... ranging from blues to Puccini...gives the film a wonderfully sad, beautiful elegance."

L’apollonide is not a house of pleasure, it is a place where hopes of love and marriage are a cruel reminder of what they can never have, it is a place where the girls dance in their despair. As Satine from Moulin Rogue sings, “Inside my heart is breaking, my makeup may be flaking, but my smile still stays on, the show must go on.”

Andrea Yew

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Film 23

STAR RATING The Silence of the Lambs Zodiac CopycatIdentityScream 3

Classic Cult

LIFE ON MARS: John Carter encounters enormous white apes and six-limbed Martians as he struggles to get to grips with his new environment

JOHN CARTER DIRECTED BY ANDREW STANTON  efore there was a Luke Skywalker B or Captain Kirk, before there was a Flash Gordon or Jake Sully, before there

were any science fiction heroes at all in fact, there was John Carter. Edgar Rice Burrough’s serial centres on a confederate captain who is transported to Mars and gets embroiled in savage Civil Warinfluenced sci-fi in ways that can barely be imagined, not to mention inventing

THE RAVEN DIRECTED BY JAMES MCTEIGUE  aking its title from Edgar Allan T Poe’s most famous poem, The Raven is a rather imaginative dramatisa-

tion of the author’s mysterious last days.

Just before his death, he was found in a delirious state wandering the streets of Baltimore wearing clothes that were not his own, but however you want to try and explain that, the events in the film probably don’t come close.

Serious explanation, however, is not the point. The Raven is a shameless attempt to squeeze in as many of Poe’s gruesome scenarios as can be reasonably expected in the best part of two hours. The premise is that a serial killer is copying the murders in his stories in an attempt to draw the author into his game. Poe undoubtedly influenced this kind of scenario, as well as virtually everything else in the detective genre, but he would not have written it. It is too fast-paced, too convoluted, lacking in Poe’s scrupulous detail and obsessive focus.

While he is best known for the creating the elaborate set-piece murders on show here, Poe’s work relies on psychological interiority and that unique melancholic atmosphere that no copycat can reproduce. The problem with The Raven is that it doesn't even try to do this and, were it not for the

sci-fi romance along the way. Which is why it is such a disappointment that the hero’s long-deserved big screen adaptation turns out to be so uneven.

With direction from Pixar powerhouse Andrew Stanton, it had every chance of success. For a CV that including both Finding Nemo and WallE, Barsoom (that’s Mars for those of you who don’t speak Martian) is unsurprisingly well realised. The six-armed Green Martians are imposing, while the massive white apes are intimidating and make their mark. These and the various other creatures create space between Barsoom and the film’s hero.

Even better than the creatures are the protagonist’s name and the continual references to his stories, you’d be hard pressed to tell it has anything to do with Poe at all.

John Cusack plays the title character, looking the part with his familiar neckerchief and sickly grey countenance. He gives a quirky performance, toying with Poe’s verbosity and injecting him with a more playful nature than you might expect. His co-star Luke Evans is less assured, unconvincingly playing a character that most actors could play in their sleep; Detective Fields is not exactly C. Auguste Dupin. Better might be expected from V for Vendetta director James McTeigue, but he is unable to create any sense of mystery or tension, relying too much on source material that he is unable to successfully reproduce on the big screen. The ending is very much a case of pulling a killer out of a hat.

It is perhaps unfair to judge the merits of a film against the work of a great 19th century author and, despite its shortcomings, The Raven is not all bad. It’s a watchable, if not exactly a thrilling thriller, and there are some good scenes carried by Cusack. As a by-the-numbers serial killer flick, it is adequate enough, but it promised so much more. The references to Poe do not make up for the lack of originality and, whether you are a fan or not, there is nothing new to see here.

Robert Dickie Reviewed at Cineworld

remarkable cityscapes: the primitive mud buildings of the warlike Green Martians, the stunning spires of the humanoid city of Helium and the mechanical, predatory city of Zadonga are all gorgeous and stand out brilliantly in the stark Martian landscape.

Unfortunately, these things lie on the periphery and the core of the film is tragically flawed. None of the characters are framed properly. The eponymous Carter (Taylor Kitsch) swings wildly from action hero to Southern gent with no space in between, while the film’s heroine, princess Dehjah Thoris (Lynn Collins), has no motivation or characterisation, other than ‘I want to

TRISHNA DIRECTED BY MICHAEL WINTERBOTTOM  rishna is an adaptation of the T Thomas Hardy classic Tess of the D’Urbervilles, set in modern day In-

dia. It’s the story of a young woman whose beauty brings about her own misfortune as she finds herself at the mercy of others. It’s certainly not a barrel of laughs and director Michael Winterbottom maintains a cold, detached documentary feel with the use of hand-held cameras, mumbled dialogue and sparse music.

“

Director Michael Winterbottom maintains a cold, detached documentary feel with the use of hand-held cameras, mumbled dialogue and sparse music."

The adaptation itself works surprisingly well, but it’s only after the second act when we start to realise that the characters of Alec D’Urberville and Angel Clare have been recreated as one character, Jay, played well by Riz Ahmed of Four Lions fame. This

DIGITALTRENDS

ost people associate animaM tion with children’s films and Disney. However, this does not do

save my city, I don’t want to get married and I really want to shag John Carter.’

The whole thing gropes from action sequence to action sequence with not enough development and the sheer amount of exposition squeezed into the few moments not involving fight choreography is enough to give you a headache. Had it been the adaptation John Carter deserved, it could have soared amongst the stars of the genre; unfortunately, this turned out to be a little lost in space.

Thom Louis Reviewed at Cineworld allows many of the book’s themes to work successfully in the modern setting, though the change in Jay seems a little too sudden and there are moments when Trishna’s motives are unclear. For those who have not read the book, the difference between the first half – which effectively plays out as a slow paced romance – and the second may seem abrupt and the film overall slightly long-winded.

However, Freida Pinto (Slumdog Millionaire) keeps the ball rolling with her performance, bringing just the right amount of innocence and naivety yet still retaining a depth and sincerity that makes it hard not to care for the character.

The montage sequences are highly repetitive, but they work with the narrative to portray Trishna’s way of life during the various situations we find her in and a lot of the key scenes from the novel have been transferred effectively to this setting. That does not mean to say, however, that all the themes and depth of Hardy’s story are maintained – some important parts are not – but, as with any adaptation, it’s hard to know where to draw the line between letting the film stand for itself and comparing it to the original.

In this case, reading the book first would make watching the film a more enjoyable experience or at least a more engaging one.

Sarah Rundell Reviewed at Cameo

justice to a medium that has the potential to create far more captivating and engaging pieces of cinema than are generally offered by live-action films. It has the ability to explore themes and ideas in an artistic style that isn’t bound by the constraints found in conventional filming.

Cult animation has generally been split into two categories: the bizarre and the adult, which for many will appear too queer to warrant any appreciation. However, there are a number of cult films which should be watched by anyone with an interest in this undervalued art form.

Almost all of the films that The Beatles produced during their career have gone on to achieve some form of cult status, none more so than Yellow Submarine (1968). The fantasy musical features animated versions of the band as they go on a surreal and psychedelic journey to save the people of Pepperland from the music hating blue meanies. With a stellar Beatles soundtrack and wildly, lush images, this is a delight for both young and old. La Planète Sauvage (Fantastic Planet, 1973) by René Laloux is a similarly dreamlike venture into the world of science fiction. In a world where human beings are treated as pests by the giant Draags, one man, Terr, stands up to rebel against humanity’s oppression.

Full of vivid imagery, its combination of strong themes of intolerance and unconventional artistry makes it a powerful piece of cinema.

Within the more adult-centred cult animation, one of the standout films has to be Heavy Metal (1981). Based on the fantasy and science fiction stories published in Heavy Metal magazine, it features a universe of graphic violence, passionate fantasies and terrifying evil.

Often played at midnight screenings and providing the inspiration for the South Park episode “Major Boobage”, its superb 80s soundtrack helped cement it as a firm cult favourite. Ralph Bakshi’s animated comedy Fritz the Cat (1972) was the first animated film to receive an X rating in the US. Following the hedonistic outings of a free loving cat during the 70s, its satire on the America of the time is hilarious, yet undoubtedly controversial. With the ability to at some point offend just about anyone, when taken with a pinch of salt it serves as great entertainment.

Finally, Bruno Bozzetto’s Allegro non Troppo (1976) is a parody of Disney’s Fantasia. A combination of live-action and different styles of animation, it sets classical music to stories ranging from the comic to the tragic. With an inventive use of animation and actor interaction, it remains an innovative example of the genre and a worthy alternative to the Disney equivalent.

This only scratches the surface of a genre that contains a plethora of fantastic films and covers a vast range of styles and techniques, but for the cult enthusiast, it is at least a decent place to start.

Ali Quaile

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Spreading like wildfire

Emmett Cruddas sees The Maccabees performing at the height of their powers at the HMV Picturehouse on the repeat leg of their tour

THE MACCABEES HMV Picturehouse 5 March

 s soon as the gentle synths of A “Given To The Wild” began to echo around the Picturehouse as The Maccabees took to the stage, everyone present knew tonight was one to celebrate one of Britain’s best bands at the peak of their game. The Maccabees treated the faithful audience to a run-through of Given To The Wild’s highlights, as well as airing some old favourites as they began their victory lap through some of the country’s biggest indoor venues following their new record’s critical and commercial success.

“

The Maccabees treated the faithful audience to a runthrough of Given to the Wild's highlights as well as airing some old favourites" Taking to the stage to the coda of Lou Reed’s “Satellite of Love”, the London six-piece managed to instantly recapture the audience after some frankly ridiculous support. La Shark drudged through 30 minutes of incoherent synth-pop, complete with handstands, bared torsos and a vocals that sounded more like a League of Gentlemen character than the Gary Numan the frontman fancied himself.

With that out of the way, the attention soon turned to Orlando Weeks’s soft, reverb-tinged voice as the headliners launched into album-opener “Child”. The bandnow endowed with a new-found and thoroughly deserved confidence compared to their Liquid Rooms show five months earlier, where they previewed a few of the huge-sounding tracks that were to make this album and gig so special.

3 DOORS DOWN & SEETHER HMV Picturehouse 9 March

 t first glance, 3 Doors Down and A Seether appear the perfect touring partners. Both create music that, while

good, is never going to offend their audience, something that can be seen by the range of t-shirts on display tonight with everything from Dillinger Escape Plan to Shinedown.

Seether open up proceedings and initially hit the stage to what seems like an enthusiastic crowd. However, it becomes clear as they go through their set that there are certain songs this crowd is waiting for, while the rest are

YOU LOOKING AT ME?: The Maccabees don't look too impressed at being locked in what looks like a shed By the up-tempo coda of the opener and its ferocious guitar solo (reeled off with effortless cool by Felix White), the room was filled with energy both from the band and the audience. While The Maccabees were once characterised by their understated performances and sound, everyone here knew just how great the new band and new songs were. Many were singing back the shimmering guitar hooks of “Feel to Follow” and “Went Away”’s bouncing synth intro had hands in the air all around, a reaction it will certainly receive as the band take on huge festival slots this summer.

Given To The Wild’s subtler moments, such as early highlight “Glimmer” sat perfectly next to older classics like “No Kind Words” or “First Love”, both of which received huge cheers as the band went back to the hits that made them such a loved band in the first place. They played them louder and tighter than ever, given that the three tracks taken from 2007 debut Colour It In come from being thrashed out in dingy toilet venues for years.

While these hits went down fantastically, tonight was really about the new tracks, which were treated with no less applause.

just filler. This atmosphere makes the performance seem flat and uninspired.

However, it feels harsh to blame Seether for that. The music they’re putting out isn’t bad, it just doesn’t seem to connect tonight.

3 Doors Down on the other hand are obviously the band most of the crowd have come to see. The second they hit the stage, the crowd picks up.

However, they seem to fall quickly into the same problem as Seether as they struggle to keep that level of enthusiasm throughout their set. There are plenty of great rock songs on display, but at no point does it feel like things are going to erupt into a higher gear.

Set highlight “When You’re Young” sounds fantastic; however, the decision to have the band leave the stage and instead have a video montage of

lead singer Brad Arnold introducing it seems a strange one as it does nothing to close the distance between band and audience. The only moment that band and audience seem connected is in the encore, when the threat of them being shut down early inspires the crowd into action during “Kryptonite” and “Believer”.

In the end, 3 Doors Down and Seether have done exactly what you would have expected them to do.

They’ve turned up and played good rock setlists. However, it’s hard to say the show was great. Neither band seems to connect with the audience in a proper way, and while there were certainly good moments, you just feel it could have been so much better.

Stuart Iversen

Tellingly, before final song “Grew Up At Midnight”, there were no customary chants for “Latchmere”, an early single and fan favourite that seemingly gets requested at every UK show they play. The Maccabees now have a live catalogue that will satisfy any fan, with the addition of breezy set-closer “Pelican” and dark, howling album and gig highlight “Forever I’ve Known” serving as just two stunners in a set full of great tunes. Leaving the stage with the album’s last song was a perfect finale, with huge group vocals and a load of percussion sending the band off to, inevitably, even greater

stages.

While Weeks kept stage chatter to a minimum, the band put in a captivating 70-minute performance, with every member (especially the drumming powerhouse Sam Doyle) playing their hearts out and delivering a complex yet crowd-pleasing set. The Maccabees keep getting better and better- putting in consistently satisfying performances. With three great albums under their belt, by the time album four comes around, they might have outgrown even Edinburgh’s biggest venues.

LOOKING LOST: Might have gone more than three doors down

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Music 25

STAR RATING  Euphoric Anthemic MelodicChronically BadPandemic

Live CHIDDY BANG

The Arches, Glasgow Thursday 8th March 

J

udging by the air of excitement that filled Glasgow’s Arches, the crowd were clearly appreciating the novelty of a female bassist casually tuning up on stage for a gig that just happened to fall on International Women’s Day. Either that or they were eagerly anticipating the arrival of uber-cool hip-hop/indie fusion duo Chiddy Bang. Most likely the latter, as when Chidera “Chiddy” Anamege bounds onto stage, he doesn’t even need to ask the crowd to throw their hands in the air.

During the opening tracks of his set, Chiddy has no trouble warming up the already enthusiastic crowd with his limitless energy, which shows absolutely no hint of slowing. His songs are constantly permeated with cries of “Hands up!” As if he even had to ask.

With a set as lively as his, it would almost be rude not to.

What sets Chiddy Bang’s set apart from many detached, straight-forward gigs is their refreshing level of interaction with their fans. Chiddy’s audience-inspired freestyle rap went down like an absolute storm. Stepping out from behind his decks, Chiddy’s mu-

Interview

EVENINGS

E

venings, the latest musical project of 21-year-old Nathan Broaddus, has been causing quite a stir recently in the blogosphere. The Charlottesville, Vriginia native has shown he can expertly combine organic synths with rumbling beats to create delicate tracks that ooze a confidence and skill far superior to his years.

Growing up, Broaddus told me how his family played a part in moulding his musical style. “My mom has really good taste in music and brought me and my brother up listening to really good stuff. She’s a really big Talking Heads fan.”

These early life musical influences are apparent and can be seen in his tracks that portray an understanding of music that is deeper than most and,

Albums CIVIL WARS Barton Hollow Review COLUMBIA

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J

oy Williams and John Paul White, the singer-songwriters who perform under the moniker The Civil Wars, are not and have never been romantically involved. But you’d never know that from their music. In fact, it’s hard to believe that the owners of these two voices, which intertwine and resonate so well with one another over the course of their debut album, Barton Hollow, could possibly be anything but madly in love with one another.

As far as Williams and White are concerned, their duo is strictly professional. The phrase “strictly professional,” however, undersells the immense emotion that the duo con-

sical partner Xaphoon boasted about his bandmate’s incredible free-styling ability and invited the audience to suggest freestyle topics. A massive swell of jumping and screaming ensued, with one fan even throwing their mobile phone onto the stage. Eventually, Xaphoon scribbled the final list of topics on a humble paper plate, which included, ‘a shirt with a picture of a cow on it’, ‘my man Zach’ and – thanks to my frantic waving of a leaflet, I happened to pick up in the foyer – ‘a moustache’. Chiddy, who happens to hold the Guinness World Record for the longest freestyle rap, willingly took the paper plate and launched straight into a smooth, rhythmic and perfectly-rhyming freestyle. Set to Tinie Tempah’s “Pass Out”, the freestyle was a crowd pleaser before it had even begun, not that it needed Tinie’s help.

Who doesn’t love an impromptu rap about cows and moustaches?

“

A massive swell of jumping and screaming ensued, with one fan even throwing her mobile phone onto the stage" Free-styling aside, the gig’s most triumphant moment was Chiddy Bang’s breakthrough hit “The Op-

LOST IN THE SUPERMARKET: Chiddy takes inspiration for his rhymes from absolutely anything! posite of Adult”. The track begun as gentle synth chords, over which Chiddy recalled how it was this song that started everything for him and Xaphoon. As the quiet synth built to the recognisable fragmented sample of MGMT’s “Kids”, the crowd erupted with movement. The whole room jumped, a circle within which people danced wildly formed, and there was

in fact, led Broaddus to studying music at the University of Virginia, where he is currently finishing his fourth year.

Although his music is now heavily electronic based, he explained that this was not always the case. “I started on guitar and was in a couple bands for a little while. About midway through university, I started working more on making electronic music because I was on my own.” This is evident on tracks such as “Still Young”, where multiple synths are layered onto a guitar core and further exhibit his multi-instrumental capabilities.

This pairing of styles, as seen in the majority of his music, can be troubling at times and have caused him some issues when translating his songs to a live environment. “I think it’s because I might be a little overly ambitious. Mixing analogue and digital sounds can be tricky. I’m still learning.”

His debut five-track EP North Dorm certainly got heads turning when it was released in Summer 2010. Flaw-

less arrangements, like in the soporific “Friend [Lover]”, perfectly captured the season of their release, placing Evenings firmly on the crest of the chillwave revolution that swept across America.

This was followed up a year later with Lately, a ten track LP that showed a transgression to a more biotic sound.

“I definitely went into making the second record with the idea of a looser feel. I wanted it to flow well between songs.”

As for the future, Broaddus said, “After I graduate, I’m planning on touring. I’m also working on another EP, but I’m taking it slow.”

On the possibility of bringing his live show to the UK, he said, “I haven’t set up any tour dates in Europe yet, but I’m working on some international shows right now. I’m sure I’ll be over there before too long. I’d really like that.”

jures up through their heartbreaking harmonies and stellar songwriting, especially in the title track as well as in “Poison & Wine”. Sure, the others songs on the album are wonderful— spare but tuneful folk music—but those two tracks keep a head above the rest.

the intimacy of “Poison & Wine” bykeeping the vocals and guitar close to the top of the mix, while allowing the stately piano progression to float up from behind. Through that contrast, the song paints an open, empty room, even as it permits us to imagine Williams whispering in one ear and White into the other, competing for our attention with their bittersweet nothings.

“Barton Hollow” is the album’s real high point, because it finds the duo scraping their way out of unobtrusive folksy territory into a far grittier and darker place. On the heels of their recent Grammy wins, there will doubtlessly be swarms of imitators, but none of them will be able to match the slow sear of this tune, which combines the swagger of country and the rhythmic incantation of gospel. It’s hard to imagine any knockoffs of that one.

“

The Civil Wars, are not, and have never been romantically involved. But you'd never know that from their music."

The lack of studio interference plays a big part in the success of Barton Hollow; this album—though obviously scrubbed squeaky clean of vocal impurities and white noise—might as well have been recorded live. Producer Charlie Peacock helps the duo maintain a warm, open space inside these tunes, seizing, for example, onto

Max Sanderson

Taylor Coe

even one quashed crowd surfing attempt. The track is so warmly received that afterwards, the crowd began to chant “Chiddy Bang” to the tune of “Give it Up”, by KC and the Sunshine Band. This was met with Chiddy’s seal of approval, and improvised musical accompaniment from his band.

After their performance of their recent single “Ray Charles”, Chiddy

Singles THE FRAY Heartbeat EPIC

Bang and their band left the stage with the crowd screaming for more.

After the briefest of encores, the duo called it a night after just one hour on stage. Although the gig was a little slender, Chiddy and Xaphoon proved that they know how to get a crowd going and that they’re not too cool to rap about moustaches.

continuous riff that doesn’t break any musical boundaries, but it fits well. It’s more of what the fans love about The Fray; a feeling of Sunday-afternoon music, relaxing yet with the fear of dread of Monday looming.



A

lmost everything by The Fray sounds the same and “Heartbeat” is no different on the face of it. The recycled piano chords don’t go anywhere but the chorus. Initially, the chorus is a disappointment in comparison to the verses – which settle neatly into the category of lyrical genii. “Thought it went out, but it’s burning just the same / And you don’t look back, not for anything,” leaves a lump in your throat, if only for a few seconds. The repetition of, “I’m feeling your heartbeat” in its honest vocals does grow on you, but only to the point where it will grind on you – and your flatmates.

The guitar drives the piece, with a

HOCKNEY INSPIRED: Courtesy of the iPad

Katie Walker

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Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

STAR RATING Literally on fireReally hotWarmChillyFreezing

Can't stand the heat

LOST

& FOUND BBC YOUTUBE

WHITE HEAT

THE STONE TAPE BBC2 (1972) Youtube.com



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ritten by criminally underrated screenwriter Nigel Kneale, The Stone Tape is an example of classic, high quality BBC horror of a pedigree the broadcasting corporation simply no longer achieves.

The programme follows a fictional research team as they relocate to a crumbling Victorian mansion in the hope of coming up with a new recording medium. The humble tape being dated and clumsy, new technology is needed in order to guarantee success for the electronics company that the team work for. However, the crew get more than they bargained for when they come across an apparently haunted room, unlocking an ancient supernatural power in their efforts to understand the secrets of the ‘recordings’ in the stone.

With distinct elements of the short lived sub-genre known as ‘Folk Horror’ (exemplified by films such as The Blood on Satan’s Claw, Witchfinder General and The Wickerman; as well as television shows like The Owl Service and The Mind Beyond: Stones), The Stone Tape also draws influence from science fiction and the traditional Victorian ghost story. Michael Bryant is fantastic as the quick tempered Peter Brock, clumsily charging head on into forces he neither appreciates nor understands, while Jane Asher is never less than convincing as sensitive heroine Jill Greeley.

Interestingly, The Stone Tape’s unusual and distinctive story was the first popular propagator of the theory of residual haunting (that ‘recordings’ or ‘essences’ of ghosts or past events may be stored in the landscape), and as such the theory has become colloquially known as the ‘Stone Tape Theory’ among those who study the supernatural. The programme also went on to heavily influence subsequent horror film and television, including the Steven Spielberg produced fright-fest Poltergeist.

The creepy sense of dread that flows throughout The Stone Tape is a glowing, ghastly testament to the writing skills of Kneale, who was perhaps better known as the brains behind the phenomenally successful Quartermass series. A prodigious writer of science fiction and horror, Kneale’s writing career is an underappreciated gold mine of fascinating and imaginative stories. Sadly, his death in 2006 recieved little fanfare.

The special effects in The Stone Tape may not have aged particularly well, but it still retains an ability to chill the viewer and creep slowly but inexorably underneath the skin and into the darkest recesses of the human psyche. For a BBC television play broadcast in 1972 this is no mean feat.

Alistair Grant

BBC2 Thursdays, 9pm



T

he BBC loves nostalgia. Too often though this can leave it abandoning drama and characters in favour of producing a perfect snapshot of whenever it’s set. That was the main problem with White Heat, the BBC’s new six-part series set in the 60s and the present day: so far it’s mainly been historical trivia and showing off costumes.

“

From black and white TV clips to the pop music and establishing the background of Churchill's funeral, this show beats you over the head with setting."

The narrative follows a group of flatmates and their idealistic, free love embracing, commune-style life together. Seemingly hand-picked by their egotistical landlord Jack to represent a diverse society, there’s main character and Christian good girl Charlotte, Jamaican scholarship student Victor, adventurous artist Lilly,

THE SARAH MILLICAN TELEVISION PROGRAMME BBC2 Thursdays, 11:20pm



S

ay what you will about female comedians, but I think Sarah Millican does it right. She is delightfully twee with her high-pitched South Shields accent squawking filthy words moments after discussing “me knickers and me nighties.” There is something about her manner that makes you imagine her as an old friend who somehow made it on to TV. The Sarah Millican Television Programme is part of the standardised format all chat shows seem to adopt. The neutral studio with its shiny floors and bright lights contrasts with the living room setting for the interviews planted in the middle. The show turns a humorous light on different TV genres, the first being wildlife documentaries. The guest stars like Chris Packham (wildlife documentary presenter) have little comic talent themselves and instead provide material for Millican to riff from. The dynamic of the interviews didn’t quite gel, with Packham trying to broadcast his views on conservation while Millican raises her eyebrows and

gay Asian Jay, hardworking Orla and traditional Alan.

The present day plot centres on identifying the mysterious identity of the dead housemate. While the identity probably won’t stay unknown for long, it’s a nice enough hook. Like the reason behind the flatmates’ earlier break-up, there’s a danger it’ll end up underwhelming but the inevitable revelation promises drama.

It’s determined to create a definitive sense of the 60s. From black and white TV clips to the pop music and establishing the background of Churchill’s funeral, this show beats you over the head with setting. That’s not necessarily a bad thing – the 60s are a good period for setting drama – and they’re painted stylishly here, but it is a little indicative of White Heat’s tone. It’s very much tell rather than show, with every theme and point hammered into the ground.

The characters are treated the same way. Each one has their single defining feature: something that’s oppressing them, a struggle to face and that’s all. It’s not that they’re badly acted. Clair Foy and Juliet Stevenson, as young and old Charlotte respectively, are good. Stevenson in particular manages to convey her present day bitterness while keeping the 60s naivety visible. It’s a shame all they’ve had to do so far is mope. Jack and Alan, the most dynamic characters, were also the most simplistically portrayed, with one for the left wing and one for the right, everything

tries to take the piss.

There is also some mediocre audience interaction, as is expected in most chat shows, but it detracted from Millican’s talent to just spout standup material on her own. Thus, the best moments of the show are those where Millican can just deliver her own jokes unimpeded.

Millican’s style can either be adorable or annoying depending on whether or not you buy her act; you either love or hate her clumsy physical comedy and awkward self-deprecation. The second half of the program directed her comic routine towards dating programs, with her ‘sexpert’ guest Tracey Cox producing a mock cocktail bar to stage some flirting, but the sketch seemed over-rehearsed and fell flat.

Chat shows these days need more interesting characters and ideas than The Sarah Millican Television Programme provides to keep the interviews and scenes original. Millican’s stand-up and improvisation is among the best of British female comedians and she really does stand better alone.

The format of a chat show doesn’t suit her training as a stand up and the other characters often end up merely disrupting her flow.

Nina Seale

SILENT BUT DEADLY: Everyone knows who the culprit was. they said and did reiterating their politics. Hopefully, as we see more of them appear in the present, they’ll get more depth in the past.

If the characters can develop into more than caricatures of their

NAZI TITANIC Channel 5 Demand 5

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azi Titanic: Revealed makes a distinct effort to portray an original look at the Nazi regime and the Second World War, telling the story of the less widely known movie propaganda that occurred behind German lines. In particular it focuses on the creation of a movie based on the sinking of the Titanic where British bureaucrats are the primary reason for the sinking rather than just bad luck and misinformation. The final ten minutes of the documentary focus on the sinking of the Cap Arconia, which was a luxury cruise liner that the Nazis filled up with concentration camp inmates and tricked the British into bombing.

The first criticism is that for a 45 minute documentary, much of the narration is less about the facts and more about building tension for the audience. This, coupled with very emotional and overly dramatic music, gives the whole show a bit of a ludicrous tone. When comparing the number of interviews with survivors and the number of recreated scenes, you have to wonder whether

respective aspect of the 60s, White Heat could still amount to something interesting. If not, it might be worth watching, but only if you’re interested in the clothes and period detail.

it would have been easier for them to just make a full-blown war time drama out of it instead.

“

much of the narration is less about the facts and more about building tension for the audience."

The overall content of the show is also troublesome, in that it continually veers off into other areas of the Nazi regime. It takes a full five minutes from the focus of Nazi propaganda to discuss the fact that the Americans and British were doing the same thing. While not completely irrelevant, it seemed more worthy of a footnote rather than the time it was allotted. The programme has also attracted much online criticism and debate due to its handling of the subject matter, in particular the sinking of the Cap Arconia.

Overall Nazi Titanic was watchable but lacked focus and over-dramatised a subject that should perhaps be handled with more consideration.

Katie Macpherson

BBC

Katie Cunningham is left feeling the chill after viewing the BBC's latest decade-jumping period drama

Tuesday March 13 2012 studentnewspaper.org

Sport fan? Write for us! sport@studentnewspaper.org

Sport 27

Fans in the dark over Olympic tickets

Injury Time

Eloise Kohler explains why Locog is facing questions over its ticketing policy Committee for the Olympic games (Locog), and Lord Coe, its chairma, recently faced the London Assembly members, who have been critical of the “unfriendliness” of the ticketing system. Questioned by Baroness Doocey, the Chair of the London Assembly’s Economy, Culture and Sport Committee, Lord Coe was accused of “obsessive secrecy”. With the London 2012 Organising Committee deemed “the least transparent organization I have ever come across.”

A complete breakdown of the percentage of tickets sold for each sporting session has been requested, but this has been resisted. Lord Coe stated that he would not release the information until the final four million tickets have been sold. “We’re not going to give a running commentary after each sale, because it creates a misleading picture. I don’t like putting out numbers based on assumptions and estimates.” Yet Baroness Doocey claims the statistics would be available “at the touch of a button” and “that there is nothing at all to stop you publishing if you have got nothing to hide.”

When applying to host the games in 2006, the organisers promised an inclusive and “highly affordable” games.

This was supported by Locog in 2010 who said that 90 per cent of the public tickets would be priced at £100 or less,

66 per cent at £50 or less, with 2.5 million tickets priced at £20 or less. It is suggested that the reason for Locog’s witholding of the information is that it is only after the remaining tickets are sold that organizers will meet their affordability targets.

The final three million tickets on offer include the Paralympic and football tournament tickets. However, opportunities to see the more popular attractions – such as the athletics, gymnastics or swimming – are relatively low, thus suggesting these tickets were either unaffordable or not

accessible for the British public.

Yet whilst the games are currently awash with scepticism, Deighton was quick to stress that a significant number of remaining seats would “find their way into British hands”, whether that be through overseas ticket sellers, sponsors or the yet-to-be-announced allocations for local sports clubs. For most people, the 2012 Olympics will be a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

We can only hope that as more tickets are released more people get the opportunity to see it.

LORD COE: The Locog chairman must answer hard questions

Abramovich strikes again

Sean Douglass explores how the Chelsea owner lost patience with Andre Villas Boas side playing football in the same spirit as Barcelona. The squad was to be rebuilt and filled with young talent like Oriol Romeu, Kevin de Bruyne and Romelu Lukaku, who would eventually take over from Frank Lampard, Didier Drogba and co. After helping Porto to a league-European double with a strong team last season, it seemed that maybe Chelsea had found Jose Mk II. But that’s the problem. Villas Boas could never be Mourinho and despite the comparisons, there are very few similarities between the two. Mourinho is able to get the best out of players because he is a superb man-manager; Villas Boas was a man much more focussed on the details- with spreadsheets and strict tactical plans, but not a whole lot of charisma. While results were

SACKED: Villas Boas is Abramovich's latest manegerial casualty

PADDY MCGUIRE

EIGHT MONTHS after taking over as Chelsea boss, Andre Villas Boas became the latest victim of West London’s Roman Empire. Staggeringly, for his short stint in charge, AVB is believed to have cost nearly £30 million in wages, compensation and the fee paid to Porto to recruit him. Roman Abramovich is not one to show patience with managers (as Avram Grant and Luiz Felipe Scolari will attest) with caretaker Roberto Di Matteo becoming the ninth manager in his nine year run as owner.

Then again, what did the Russian think would happen – you can’t expect a guy from Portugal with no playing experience to come to one of the biggest clubs in England and be a success, right?

Villas Boas was brought in because Abramovich recognised that Chelsea needed to change. The appointment was meant to be the start of a more adventurous, attacking

ultimately what sealed his fate, Villas Boas also seemed to lose the dressing room, a cardinal sin for a manager, quite quickly into his stint in charge. AVB is 34 years old and not much older than key figures in the first team like Drogba, Lampard, John Terry and Ashley Cole. From the start, there was always the possibility that he could be undermined but no-one could have expected what actually happened this season.

AVB was not the Special One, and while Jose talked about omelettes, all Villas Boas could do was smash some of the eggs he had at his disposal. In AVB’s time, he alienated Lampard, Cole and Drogba, lost John Terry to injury and saw his skipper accused of racism. Chelsea’s previously solid defence started to concede at a surprising rate and Fernando Torres has scored as many league goals as Gary Caldwell so far this season.

Behind Mario Balotelli, Chelsea are easily the most entertaining and dysfunctional saga in the Premier League this season. When a young manager comes in with new ideas, the senior players are the ones you usually look to for help when changing the way the club plays; in this case, they were the main obstacle.

This is just another example of the right man at the wrong time.

Villas Boas helped to develop a strong, young, attack-minded team at Porto, but many of the pieces were already in place. His key input was his tactical nose to get the best out of the squad he had available. When he came to Chelsea, he was asked to radically change a previously successful team that

needed to enter a period of transition, while instilling a new brand of attractive football. AVB was backed for the long term (i.e. signing Mata and the youngsters), but he not the short term, where he had to use an aging, unreceptive squad.

“

Chelsea's actions smack of short-term desperation while Villas Boas is unlucky to be out of a job after such a short period of time in charge."

How is one ‘bad’ season (they are within touching distance of fourth place) enough to justify dumping the man you brought in to give you another period of long term success?

Chelsea’s actions smack of short term desperation while Villas Boas is unlucky to be out of a job after such a short period of time in charge.

Now they are searching for a new boss. Again. It’s not surprising to see a host of managers ruling themselves out of the running – the only incentive for any manager thinking of taking the job is the prospect of a handsome pay-off months down the line.

With a squad full of massive egos, an unpredictable owner and a huge rebuilding job on their hands, it would take a mad man to accept the job. So who is the favourite? Jose Mourinho. Classic Chelsea, here we go again…

STEVE WALKER

YOU’D HAVE to have been living under a rock for the past year to have missed out on the Olympic 2012 ticketing controversy. With the selloff announced in June 2011, mass disappointment was felt by the nation as many people who’d spent potentially “thousands of pounds on tickets” ended up with absolutely zilch.

1.9 million people applied for more than 20 million London 2012 tickets, with just 700,000 of them being successful – meaning that less than half of the people wanting tickets actually obtained them.

In many ways, this was unavoidable. With only 6.6 million tickets available to a British public with a population of over 60 million - if everyone applied for only one ticket, there was still only a one in ten chance of getting a ticket to the London Olympics. These chances are notably lower when you factor in the point that people understandably applied to watch multiple events. Especially after it was announced that it was not in fact 6.6 million tickets up for grabs, but 1.3 million less than that. There were also 2.2million set aside for VIPs, sponsors and the so-called Olympic family.

What has angered the British public, however, is the lack of transparency about the process. Paul Deighton, chief executive of the London Organising

TAKES A WRY LOOK AT THE WORLD OF SPORT

A day in the life of Lee Cattermole Dear diary, It’s derby day today. I mean they call it “derby day”, but seeing as I have no affiliation to either club – being a Middlesbrough lad born and bred to hate both Newcastle and Sunderland – it’s really “an excuse to try and break someone’s leg day”.

While chomping a bowl of Weetabix this morning, I visualised the whole of the Newcastle squad. I could half Big Shola once he comes on, couldn’t I? I mean after all he is the so-called “Mackem Slayer”. But hang-on, no.

He’s a big lad. Best leave him to it…

How about Fabricio Coloccini then? I mean anyone with hair that makes them look like a cross between Brian May and Deirdre Barlow does not deserve to walk around unscathed.

But, again, no – Martin’s told me to nail someone first up, not sure I can get that close to Colo within the first minute.

I bumped into James McClean on the way to the team bus and ask his advice. “Top of the morning,” James said in his usual jovial tone. “Why don’t you just feckin’ end Cheick Tiote and have it done with?”

“That’s the one,” I thought. "I can hit him in no time." The gaffer will be so proud – he’ll jump and dance round the touchline like a little leprechaun.

In a derby the ref might let some things go. He might not even mind if Cheick can’t walk afterwards. So as the first whistle went, I honed in on him. Ten seconds went by, I bottled it… 30 seconds went by, bollocks I missed another chance… 40 seconds in – "ah fuck it," I thought, and went in for the kill…

Off my feet I went, through the back of him, and just wrapped my trailing leg around his for good measure.

“Are you shitting me ref?” I shouted in fury. “That was never a booking. It’s a derby for Christ’s sake, you’re meant to let challenges like that go so the fans can see how passionate I really am by hospitalising someone.”

Booked 40 seconds in is a joke.

That meant I had to do something unusual – keep my discipline.

The charade lasted fairly well. In fact, in the first half I was the best player on the pitch, controlling the game by actually playing football. It felt weird.

At half-time Martin explained to me my role for the second half. “In fairness, Lee, you did as I asked and, to be fair, second half do the same – see if you can rough them up some more, for fairness.”

I had a quiet game after the break because Stephanie or whatever you call him beat me to the red card. This annoyed me. As the full-time whistle blew, I realised that was my last chance to shine – to be a derby hero and go down in Mackem folklore.

I vented my anger, “Fucking hell Mike, why don’t you just hand the game to them? You’re a cheating git you are, fuck you!” That’s what I said, or something like it – maybe with more expletives and less big words, but it was along those lines.

At least I got the sixth red card of my career – no matter that it wasn’t within the 90 minutes, I still get the suspension that goes with it. Looking forward to the time off so I can cheer on the boys from the stands.

Chris Waugh

Sport

Tuesday March 13 2012

studentnewspaper.org

Dear diary,

Read Injury Time's exclusive extract from the diary of Sunderland hard-man Lee Cattermole 27

Boost for SFA's development goals

BRIGHT YOUNG THINGS: The SFA want more young footballers AMBITIOUS PLANS by the Scottish Football Association to double grass-roots participation – outlined by Chief Executive Stewart Regan during Edinburgh University’s Innovative Learning Week – received an international boost last week.

The International Football Association Board (IFAB) approved a two-year experiment by the four Home Associations to increase to number of substitutions allowed in the amateur game.

Regan declared the amendment a major step towards the strategic goal of increasing the number of football participants from 65,000 to 130,000.

“We are delighted with the modi fication allowing a more flexible approach to the number of substitutes in the amateur game,” he said.

“This will enable us to encourage as many people as possible to take up the game.

“Strong, quality growth is a fundamental pillar of our strategy.”

At its AGM in Surrey, the IFAB (responsible for rule changes and of which the Scottish FA is a member) also confirmed that goal line technology could be introduced as early as next year, after two systems were approved for further testing.

Hawk-Eye, which uses optical recognition with cameras, and Go-

JIM GAIR

Rule change aids plans outlined by Chief Exec Stuart Regan during Edinburgh Uni visit, write Davie Heaton and Sean Douglass alRef, which utilises a magnetic field with a special ball to identify goals, both met the criteria set out by the board and will be tested further with a final decision to be made at the Special Meeting in Kiev on 2nd July.

Regan said, “We’ve been very supportive of goal line technology for some time if it is proven to be effective.

“The presentation by EMPA was excellent and we’re delighted to see two companies go forward.”

Other developments from the meeting include plans to review the ‘triple punishment’ (penalty kick, red card and player suspension) in the event of a player denying an obvious goal-scoring opportunity, while FIFA withdrew proposals to allow a fourth substitute during extra time.

Meanwhile, the Additional Assistant Referees experiment, which is on-going in several competitions including the UEFA Champions League, will continue with a final report to be presented in July.

And Jordon’s HRH Prince Ali Bin Hussein, a member of the FIFA Executive Committee, made a plea to allow the wearing of headscarves by female players – which was agreed in principle pending a health and

safety review.

Regan had previously visited Edinburgh University’s Business School during Innovative Learning Week to present an hour-long lecture on business strategy.

He outlined his plans to improve youth-development and grass-roots participation. One scheme to get football onto the national curriculum, with students to train before class each day, is being trialled in seven Scottish schools. Youth football will be moved to a summer schedule to take advantage of better pitches to produce more technical players.

He also expressed his disappointment that the SFA had found out many of the developments regarding Rangers’ financial crisis through the media rather than from the club, but said the SFA had no reason to question how Craig Whyte secured the money to buy the club.

Regan defended the Old Firm’s dominance of the SPL as merely the “logical progression of both football and business”, citing Barcelona and Real Madrid’s dominance in Spain as an example, and proposed a playoff system in the lower Scottish divisions to mirror the formula that has been a success in England.

Overall BUCS Standings 7th Nottingham 8th Edinburgh 1678 9th Manchester

1651

Edinburgh BUCS Points 1st Swimming 238 2nd Fencing 3rd Hockey 4th Squash 5th Table Tennis 6th Lacrosse

136 131 127 116 108

1696

Wed 7th March Results Aberdeen 1st 56-35 Edinburgh 2nd (Women's Basketball) Abertay 1st 2-0 Edinburgh 4th (Men's Hockey) Edinburgh 1st 2-1 Heriot-Watt 1st (Men's Hockey) Glasgow 1st 2-4 Edinburgh 1st (Women's Hockey) Edinburgh 1st 9-5 King's College 1st (Men's Table Tennis) Edinburgh 1st 56-82 Worcester 1st (Men's Basketball) Stirling 2nd 2-2 Edinburgh 1st (Men's Football) Edinburgh 5th 19-8 Dundee 2nd (Women's Netball)

Championship success for swimmers Davie Heaton reports on a big win for Edinburgh Uni at the Scottish Student Aquatics Championships ships in Scotland.

Thursday 1st March saw men’s and women’s water polo teams fight it out in the group stages, while Friday 2nd saw the end of the water

polo group stages and the beginning of the swimming event. Saturday 3rd March finished the swimming and was the finals for the water polo.

Other notable swims came from

RESPECTABLE: The men's water polo side came third

LIZ TRETT

A SUPERB showing from the University of Edinburgh saw them take the overall swimming crown at the Scottish Student Aquatics Championship in Inverness this month.

They romped to victory with 286.5 points, well clear of secondplaced Aberdeen on 243.

Ishbel Rodger stole the show with a lightning 1:08:10 in the women’s 100m individual medley, before sealing the 200m individual medley as well.

Jennifer Davis took both the women’s 100m and 50m butterfly, Kelsey Swensen took the 400m freestyle, Iona Campbell took the 100m breaststroke and the team took the women’s 4x50 freestyle relay.

Meanwhile, the water polo men’s 2nd took third place after beating Stirling 10-7 in a play-off.

What was previously two separate events, the Scottish Student Short Course Swimming Championships and the Scottish Student Water Polo Cup, were combined into the largest student-focused aquatics champion-

Luke Campbell of the University of Glasgow, with a time of 52.50 in the Men’s 100 Meter Freestyle, Mark Campbell of the University of Aberdeen, who clocked 1:03.34 in the Men’s 100 Meter Breaststroke, and Callum Hillicks of the University of Stirling who went 56.10 in the Men’s 100 meter Butterfly.

The University of St. Andrews won both the Men’s and Women’s water polo competitions.

The top goal scorer for the men was Nick Froy of the University of St. Andrews with 15 goals for the tournament, while the top women shooter was Fionnuala Quinn of Robert Gordon University with 14.

Meanwhile, last week swimmers from the Edinburgh University Swimming and Waterpolo Club Performance Squad competed in the Olympic trials at the London Olympic pool.

Twelve Edinburgh swimmers competed, four men and eight women, against professional British and international athletes.

Men's Water Polo Results 1st St Andrews 1st 2nd St Andrews 2nd 3rd Edinburgh 2nd Women's Water Polo Results 1st St Andrews 1st 2nd Stirling 1st 3rd RGU 1st Men's Swimming Results 1st Aberdeen 2nd Glasgow 3rd Edinburgh 103

119 112

Women's Swimming Results 1st Edinburgh 183.5 2nd Aberdeen 124 3rd RGU 95 Overall Swimming Results 1st Edinburgh 286.5 2nd Aberdeen 3rd RGU 3rd Glasgow

243 176 176