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Volume 7 Issue 33

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3rd Quarter 2011 TABLE OF CONTENTS ISSUE 2011.33

Strange Lawsuits

Q. What’s wrong with lawyer jokes? A. Lawyers don’t think they’re funny, and nobody else thinks they’re jokes.

Week 33 Aug 14 - 20 Page 1

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Overcoming the Odds: Falling from the Sky pages 5-6

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STRANGE LAWSUITS by T.A. Tafoya

There is no shortage of lawsuits. Lawyers keep busy defending weird and wacky cases. Tidbits looks at a few frivolous lawsuits for a laugh, but don’t try them yourself! Frivolous lawsuits rarely make it through the courts and usually end up costing the plaintiff. • Richard Overton took the advertising message of Anheuser-Busch a bit too literally. In 1991, he sued the company for $10,000 claiming to have suffered emotional distress, mental injury and financial loss because drinking AnheuserBusch beer did not bring to life the beautiful women in tropical settings as was advertised. The supposed false advertising led him to buy and drink more Bud Light. The case was dismissed. • An episode of “Fear Factor” prompted Austin Aitken to sue NBC for $2.5 million in 2005. Aitken claimed to have suffered injury and great pain after watching contestants on the television eat rats. This caused him to become light-headed and dizzy, which resulted in him vomiting and running into a doorway. The judge threw out the lawsuit.

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LAWSUITS (continued): • In 2006, Allen Heckard sued Michael Jordan and Nike founder Phil Knight for $832 million. In the suit he claimed to suffer defamation, permanent injury and emotional pain and suffering because he was often mistaken for Michael Jordan. He said that continual public harassment because of the alleged resemblance “has troubled his nerves.” Heckard dropped the lawsuit later that year. • After eating Cap’n Crunch with Crunch Berries over a period of four years, Janine Sugawara realized that the “Crunch Berries” in the cereal were not real fruit. She filed a class-action suit against Quaker’s parent company PepsiCo in 2009 for fraud and breech of warranty, seeking full restitution of all money gained through misleading labeling and a court order forcing Quaker to disclose to the public the true composition of Crunch Berries. The case was dismissed. 1. U.S. PRESIDENTS: Who is the only person to have served as president and later as chief justice of the United States? 2. GEOGRAPHY: In what city would one find the 11th century St. Mark’s Basilica? 3. SOCIAL SCIENCE: The ruler of a theocracy derives power from what source? 4. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: Which U.S. president popularized the term “muckrakers” for investigative journalists? 5. LITERATURE: Who wrote the novel “Cat’s Cradle”? 6. HISTORY: Osceola was a leader in which Native American tribe? 7. FOOD & DRINK: What is the common name for “prunus persica”? 8. BUSINESS: What business made John Davison Rockefeller a wealthy man? 9. MATH: What is the Arabic equivalent of the Roman numeral MMD? 10. LANGUAGE: What is the meaning of the Latin prefix “ambi”? Answers 1. William Howard Taft 2. Venice, Italy 3. God 4. Theodore Roosevelt 5. Kurt Vonnegut 6. Seminoles 7. Peach 8. Oil 9. 2,500 10. On both sides

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1. Name the duo who wrote and released “Summer Breeze.” 2. Who released “Dance With Me Henry (Wallflower)” in 1955? Big bonus points for knowing her birth name. 3. Name the instrument played by duo Ferrante and Teicher. 4. Who wrote and released “Simple Man” in 1973? 5. Joe Esposito’s “Lady, Lady, Lady” was featured in what film’s soundtrack? 6. The Beatles got 10 nominations at the 1966 Grammys for their 1965 work. How many Grammys did they win? Answers 1. Seals and Crofts, in 1972. The Isley Brothers also covered the song. In 1993 the song made it into the film “Dazed and Confused.” 2. Georgia Gibbs, born Frieda Lipschitz, had one of her two No. 1 hits with the song. The other was “Kiss of Fire” in 1952. 3. Piano. Arthur Ferrante and Louis Teicher played instrumentals that often ended up in big movie soundtracks, such as “Exodus” and “Midnight Cowboy.” 4. Ronnie Van Zant and Gary Rossington of Lynyrd Skynyrd. Bad Company (1976) and Charlie Daniels (1989) also recorded songs titled “Simple Man.” 5. “Flashdance ... What a Feeling,” in 1983. Esposito’s work includes music in “The Karate Kid” and “Coming to America.” 6. None. They were beaten out by Frank Sinatra and Roger Miller. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

• In 1910, Olaf Olverson was desperate for cash, so he sold his body to the Karolinska Institute in Stockholm, Sweden, for medical 1. Is the Bookresearch of Lydia in 1. In 2009, Michael the Old or New Testament after his death. A year later, he inherited a or Wuertz became the third neither? A’s reliever haveto100 2. From 1back” Corinthians fortune. Hetotried “buy himself from 11, strikeouts in a season. because of “what” did Paul Nameinstitute, either of thebut first two the they say wouldn’t women cooperate. should have a to do it. “symbol of authority”? Life, When Olverson refused to donate his body, 2. Two pitchers in the Trust, Love, Angels 1990s had seasons with at 3. Whose four daughters the suedpitched him for breach of contract. leastinstitute 200 innings were considered prophetand 20 or lost fewer esses?judge Gad, ruled Philip, that Jonah, Olverson thewalks. case. The Name either one. Noah Whoonly was owed the lasthis col-body4.toFrom he3.not the Institute, Hebrews 7,he who lege football coach to win was the only king said to have owed them money for the two teeth he had back-to-back consensus neither mother nor father? national titles? Solomon, David, Melchizeremoved without the Institute’s permission, 4. True or false: LeBron dek, Sargon James has had morehad sea-illegally saying Olverson tampered with 5. Whose biblical name sons of tallying at least meant, “God has helped”? 2,000 property. points, 500 rebounds their Solomon, Paul, Lazarus,

and 500 assists than Oscar Amos Robertson did? 6. From Acts 10, who said, 5. In 2007, Colorado’s “Not so, Lord, for I have Karlis Skrastins set an NHL never eaten anything that record for most consecuis common or unclean”? tive regular-season games Herod, Peter, Thomas, John played by a defenseman the Baptist (495). Who broke the mark ANSWERS: 1) Neither; in 2011? 2)Master Angels;Stylist 3) Philip; 4) 6. When was the last time Melchizedek; 5) Lazarus; 6) an English player won the Peter Golden Ball award for the Comments? More Trivia? world’s best men’s soccer Visit www.TriviaGuy.com. 2515 Old Whittlesey Rd, Suite D player? © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. 7. Who was the first bowlColumbus, GA er to record two consecu706.563.2200 tive perfect 300 games? Answers 1. Rollie Fingers (197273, 1975-76) and Dennis Eckersley (1987). 2. Atlanta’s Greg Maddux (1997) and St. Louis’ Bob Ages 3 Weeks to 12 Years Tewksbury (1992, ‘93). 3. Nebraska’s Tom Open: Monday - Friday 5:15am to 6pm Osborne (1994, 95). 4. False. Each has School Programs Before andplayer After done it in six seasons. Drop-off Pick-up 5. Calgary’s&Jay Bouw- for Local Schools meester. State Licensed 6. In 2001, Michael Owen won the award. 7. Frank Carauna of Buffalo, 1221 N.Y., inCommerce 1924. Drive • Auburn, AL

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LAWSUITS (continued): • Bobby Mackey’s Music World in Wilder, Kentucky, was sued by J.R. Costigan in 1993. He claimed a ghost “punched and kicked him” while he was using the bar’s restroom one night. He sued the bar for $1,000 in damages and demanded that a warning sign of the ghost’s presence be put up in the restroom. The club’s lawyer filed a motion to dismiss the case, citing the difficulty of getting the ghost into court to testify for the defense. The case was dismissed. • In 1976, at the University of California Los Angeles Medical Center, doctors removed John Moore’s spleen in a successful effort to cure his cancer. Doctors later found that the spleen possessed unique cancerfighting cells. Experiments with the cells led to a new discovery worth an estimated $3 billion. Moore tried to sue the University of California, claiming his spleen was pirated. The spleen had belonged to him so he should share in the commercial value. He sued for part of the profits, but in 1990, 14 years after the operation, Moore lost the case. • Computer designers at Apple codenamed a new computer model Sagan in 1993. Traditionally, this is an honor. “You pick a name of someone you respect,” an employee explained, “and the code is only used while the computer is being developed. It never makes it out of the company.” This didn’t matter to Carl Sagan; his lawyers complained that the code was “an illegal usurpation of his name for commercial purposes” and demanded that it be changed. The designers changed it to BHA, which stood for “Butt-Head Astronomer.” Sagan sued again, contending “Butt-Head” is “defamatory on its face.” Apple won.

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1. Name the duo who 1. U.S. PRESIDENTS: Who is the only person to Name the duoandwho wrote and released “Sumserved as president Who is the only person to have 1. merWith Breeze.” that fastball, Ameriand released as chief justice of “Sumthe The Tragic Case have served as president and laterwrote 1. released Intook2009, Michael canWho scouts notice. The 2. “Dance United States? mer Breeze.” of Hideki Irabi later as chief justice of the SanWuertz Diego Padres bit the first,third became With Me Henry (Wallflow2. GEOGRAPHY: In what 2.You Who released point “Dance purchasing his United States? can probably to er)” in 1955? Big bonus A’s reliever tocontract have 100 cityWith would find the 11th from Chiba Lotte. It was Meone Henry (Wallflowone pitch — a 98-mph fast- points for knowing hera birth 2. GEOGRAPHY: In what century strikeouts in season. St. Mark’s Basilicontroversial at the time ball — that came to ruin one in 1955? Big bonus name. city would one find the 11th ca?er)” because to that no two Nameupeither ofpoint, the first man’s life. for knowing her birth 3. Name the instrument American baseball team century St. Mark’s Basili- 3.points SOCIAL SCIENCE: It was 1996, and a kid todirectly do it. played by duo Ferrante and had intervened with named Irabu of the Thename. ruler Hideki of a theocracy ca? 2. Two pitchers in the Japanese baseball negotiaChiba Lotte the Marines tossed Teicher. 3. Name power frominstrument what 3. SOCIAL SCIENCE: derives tions in wrote such a and manner. And 1990s had seasons with at 4. Who released that pitch past a stunned played by duo Ferrante and in a culture that steadfastly The ruler of a theocracy source? Kazuhiro Kiyohara of the “Simple least 200 innings pitched Man” in 1973? 4.Teicher. GENERAL KNOWLadheres to an intricate code Seibu Lions. At the time it derives power from what EDGE: 5. Esposito’s “Lady, and 20 or fewer walks. Which U.S. of Joe manners, Irabu bucked was the fastest pitch in Japa- Lady, 4. Who wrote andpresireleased source? Lady” waswould featured in one. only the Name trend. either He dent“Simple popularized the term nese baseball history. Man” in 1973? playfilm’s for thesoundtrack? Yankees. 4. GENERAL KNOWL- “muckrakers” 3. Who was the last colWith ERAsforininvestithe 2.50 what 5.journalists? Joeand Esposito’s 1997, for the 6. In TheMarch Beatles got 10 nomregion multiple “Lady, years EDGE: Which U.S. presi- gative lege football coach to win rights to to the 27atjust thetalk 1966 GramLady” was strikeouts, featured with 200-plus 5.Lady, LITERATURE: Who in inations dent popularized the term back-to-back consensus year-old Irabu,1965 the work. Yanks and with players like Hideo mys for their what thefilm’s novelsoundtrack? “Cat’s Cra“muckrakers” for investi- wrote gave the Padres $3 million national titles? Nomo, Shigetoshi Hasega- How many Grammys did 6. The 10 nom- in cash, dle”? five mid-tier major gative journalists? wa and Beatles Takashi got Kashiwada 4. True or false: LeBron they win? leaguers and five minor6.inations HISTORY: Osceola was at the 1966 — who signed across Gramtown 5. LITERATURE: Who a leader James has hadBymore prospects. May, seaAnswers in New which1965 Native for the York Mets mys for their work. league wrote the novel “Cat’s Cra- American Irabu pinstripes, sonswas ofandin tallying atinleast — George Steinbrenner 1. Seals Crofts, tribe? Howthe many Grammys did signed to a four-year condle”? Yankees 1972. 2,000 rebounds The points, Isley 500 Brothers 7. and FOODNew & York DRINK: tract worth $12.8 million they win?common wanted make aname move. also 6. HISTORY: Osceola was What covered the song. In is the to 500 assists than Oscar andand a signing bonus of $8.5 Hideki Irabu — “The Nolan 1993 the song made Answers persica”? a leader in which Native for “prunus million. Robertson did? it into Ryan of Japan” — was their film “Dazed Con8. BUSINESS: What busi- in the Irabu on and to win 34 1. Seals and Crofts, American tribe? man. 5. went In 2007, Colorado’s games in his six-year Major madeThe John This wasn’t theDavison first time fused.” Isley Brothers 7. FOOD & DRINK: ness1972. Karlis Skrastins set an League Baseball career. Georgia Gibbs, bornNHL a wealthy man? the Yankees played catch-up also covered the Brooklyn song. In 2. Herecord What is the common name Rockefeller for insults most consecuendured from in race ball. Frieda Lipschitz, had one of 9. MATH: WhatThe is the Ara(“fat toad”) the song made it into herSteinbrenner for “prunus persica”? Dodgers broke baseball’s tiveNo. regular-season games two 1 hits with the bic 1993 equivalent of the Roman and Yankee fans alike who color barrier in 1947 the film “Dazed and with Con- song.played 8. BUSINESS: What busi- numeral by was aa guy defenseman The support other “Kiss MMD? couldn’t who Jackie Robinson, the Yanfused.” ness made John Davison 10. ofonly Fire” in 1952. LANGUAGE: (495). Who the mark played in broke one postkees waited untilWhat 1955 2.meaning Georgia born 3. Piano. Arthur Ferrante Rockefeller a wealthy man? is the of Gibbs, the Latin season game but wore two in 2011? before they activated Elston championship rings. played Louis Teicher “ambi”? Frieda Lipschitz, oneanof and Howard. Howardhad was 9. MATH: What is the Ara- prefix 6. When was the last time Alcohol played thata bigger often incredible twoAnswers No.player, 1 hitssomeone with the instrumentals bic equivalent of the Roman her English player won partan inup his in life after the big the who survived the pressure ended big movie 1.song. William Taft “Kiss TheHoward other was numeral MMD? leagues turned their back for on the Golden Ball award of being the catcher who soundtracks, such as “ExoVenice, Italy him, and after a few arrests Fire” in 1952. 10. LANGUAGE: What 2.of succeeded Yogi Berra. His dus” world’s best men’s soccer “Midnight for and intoxication and Cowwhatnumber is retired the 3. Piano. Arthur with Ferrante is the meaning of the Latin 3. God player? boy.” ever presumed family prob4.and Theodore Roosevelt Yankees, and he is forever Louis Teicher played 4. prefix “ambi”? lems had, hisZant wife left Ronnie Van and 7.heWho was the first bowlenshrined in the baseball 5. Kurt Vonnegut him. instrumentals thatCooperoften Gary Rossington of Lynyrd Hall of Fame at er to record two consecuAnswers 6. Seminoles It was as if his life had stown. up in big movie Skynyrd. Bad Company tivefull perfect 300 games? 7.ended Peach 1. William Howard Taft come circle. His soluHideki Irabusuch is no longer (1976) and Charlie Daniels soundtracks, as “Exo8. Oil tion was to hang himself last 2. Venice, Italy with us. Answers (1989) also recorded songs July. 9.dus” 2,500 His and story“Midnight begins and Cowends 3. God 1. been Rollie Fingers titled “Simple Man.” It has said that there(1972is 10. both sides asOn a sad one. His father was boy.” 4. Theodore Roosevelt 5. ... and What a no“Flashdance such as talent, there 73, thing 1975-76) Dennis an unseen, never-spoken-of © 2011King Features Synd., Inc. 4. Ronnie Van Zant and is only pressure. Pressure, 5. Kurt Vonnegut in 1983. EsposiAmerican serviceman who Feeling,” Eckersley (1987). Gary Rossington ofnight Lynyrd over manyincludes years, makes a work music met his mother one in to’s 6. Seminoles 2. Atlanta’s Greg Maddux diamond. For Hideki, on Skynyrd. Bad Company Okinawa. In a culture that in “The Karate Kid” and 7. Peach and St. Louis’ and(1997) off the diamond, he just Bob abhors and any sort of disgrace, to America.” (1976) Charlie Daniels “Coming couldn’t make the time.‘93). 8. Oil Tewksbury (1992, Irabu’s mother later mar6. None. They were beaten (1989) recorded ried a also Japanese man songs who Mark Vasto is a veteranTom 9. 2,500 Nebraska’s by3.Frank Sinatra and titled “Simple Man.” instilled enough discipline out sportswriter and publisher 10. On both sides Osborne (1994, 95). in boy to play...and suc-a Roger of TheMiller. Kansas City Luminary. 5.the “Flashdance What © 2011King Features Synd., Inc. © 20114. King Features Synd., Inc. False. Each player has ceed wildly in baseball. Feeling,” in 1983. Esposi- © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. done it in six seasons. to’s work includes music 5. Calgary’s Jay Bouwin “The Karate Kid” and meester. “Coming to America.” 6. In 2001, Michael Owen 6. None. They were beaten

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LAWSUITS (continued): • Chicago lawyer Frank Zaffere sued his exfiancé Maria Dillon when she broke off their engagement in 1992. Zaffere filed a suit for $40,310.48 to cover his “lost courting 1. Is the Book of Lydia in did send 1. In 2009, Michael theexpenses.” Old or New He Testament or a letter along with court 1. Is became the Bookthe of Lydia Wuertz third inneither? papers to his ex stating: “I am still willing to Old or New Testament A’sthereliever to have 100 or 2. From 1 Corinthians 11, neither? marry you on the conditions herein below set strikeouts in a season. because of “what” did Paul 2. either From of 1 Corinthians Name the first two 11,sayforth: women should have a 1) We proceed with our marriage within to because do it. of “what” did Paul“symbol of authority”? Life, 45 days the date of this letter; 2) You confirm 2. Two pitchers in the say women should have aTrust, Love, of Angels 1990s had seasons with atLife, 3.[that you]four . . . daughters will forever be faithful to me; 3) Whose “symbol of authority”? least 200 innings pitched were considered prophetTrust, Love, Angels You promise . that you will never lie to me and 20 or fewer walks. esses? Gad, Philip,. .Jonah, 3. either Whose four daughters Name one. again about anything.” He closed with: “Please Noah were 3. Who considered was the lastprophetcol4. From freeHebrews to call 7, mewho if you have any questions esses? Gad,coach Philip, Jonah,wasfeel lege football to win the only king said to have back-to-back consensus neither Noah or would discuss any of the matters motherlike nor tofather? national titles?Hebrews 7, whoSolomon, David, Melchize4. From discussed herein. Sincerely, Frank.” The case 4. True or false: LeBron was the only king said to havedek, Sargon James has had more seadismissed andname so was the wedding. Whose biblical neither mother nor father? 5.was

sons of tallying at least meant, “God has helped”? Solomon, Melchize- • Andrea Pizzo, a former student of the University 2,000 points,David, 500 rebounds Solomon, Paul, Lazarus, dek, Sargon and 500 assists than Oscar Amos Maine, sued her alma mater for failing to 5. Whose Robertson did? biblical name 6.of From Acts 10, who said, 5. In 2007, meant, “God Colorado’s has helped”?“Not protect her for fromI have a cow with a “dangerous so, Lord, Karlis Skrastins set an NHL Solomon, Paul, Lazarus,never eaten anything disposition.” Whilethat taking a class in livestock record Amosfor most consecuis common or unclean”? tive6.regular-season games management, a 400-plus-pound Bovine headHerod, Peter, Thomas, John From Acts 10, who said, played by a defenseman the Baptist “Not so, Lord, for I have butted her into the wall of its pen. Pizzo (495). Who broke the mark ANSWERS: 1) Neither; in never 2011? eaten anything that2) suffered knee and wrist injuries, so she sued Angels; 3) Philip; 4) is When common orlastunclean”? 6. was the time Melchizedek; 5) Lazarus; 6) the college for an unspecified amount. In her Thomas, JohnPeter anHerod, EnglishPeter, player won the Golden Ball award for the suit she claims the school “should have known the Baptist Comments? More Trivia? world’s best men’s ANSWERS: 1) soccer Neither; Visit thatwww.TriviaGuy.com. the heifer had a personality problem.” player? 2) Angels; 3) Philip; 4) © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. Verdict unknown. 7. Who was the first bowlMelchizedek; 5) Lazarus; 6) er to record two consecuPeter • Cynthia Economou was sued by Karl Lambert tive perfect 300 games? Comments? More Trivia? in Florida court; he claimed that Economou Answers www.TriviaGuy.com. 1. Visit Rollie Fingers (1972stole his foot. Lambert’s foot was severed in a 73, © 1975-76) and Dennis 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. Eckersley (1987). car accident, and Economu, the paramedic on 2. Atlanta’s Greg Maddux site, took his mangled limb to help in the training (1997) and St. Louis’ Bob Tewksbury (1992, ‘93). of her body recovery dog. In her defense, 3. Nebraska’s Tom Economu said, “It was an unrecognizable mass Osborne (1994, 95). of flesh ... It wasn’t a clean cut. You couldn’t 4. False. Each player has done it in six seasons. even recognize it as a foot ... If I had thought 5. Calgary’s Jay Bouwit was somehow re-attachable and usable, I meester. 6. In 2001, Michael Owen would have gone to my commander.” She was won the award. charged with second-degree petty theft and 7. Frank Carauna of Buf—35— falo, N.Y., in 1924. received six months of probation. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

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Overcoming the Odds: Falling from the Sky What would you do if you were in an airplane miles above the earth and the unthinkable happened — the plane breaks apart, and you suddenly find yourself in a free fall? If you were above 10,000 feet, you would quickly lose consciousness due to thin air. When you reached 10,000 feet, you may wake up. A free fall from 35,000 feet would take about three minutes with a landing speed of around 125 miles per hour! (Of course, the time and rate of speed depend on your weight and the amount of air drag created by the position of your body.) The following stories are about two amazing survivors of freefalling experiences. • In April 1944, Pilot Joe Herman of the Royal Australian Air Force and his crew were on a mission to bomb munitions factories at Bochum. After dropping its bombs, the plane was struck by enemy fire. Herman ordered his crew to bail out, but before he could secure his parachute, the plane exploded, and he was thrown into the night air.

3rd Quarter 2011 Week 33 Aug 14 - 20

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• As he was falling, he bumped into what he thought was debris. In a panic, Herman grabbed on, but then realized it was the leg of mid-upper gunner, John Vivashand, who at that moment was opening his parachute. The parachute inflated slowly, which helped Herman maintain his firm grasp. The two men came down safely with Herman hitting the ground first. His only injury was two broken ribs.

Greg Biffle’s Got to Stay Positive Greg Biffle is relieved to see things returning to normal at Roush Fenway Racing. Biffle, 41, has been competing regularly at the Sprint Cup level for the Ford team founded by Jack Roush since 2003, winning 16 times and finishing second to Tony Stewart in the 2005 championship standings. Biffle also finished third, behind champion Jimmie Johnson and teammate Carl Edwards, in 2008. Normal, for Biffle, would involve making the Chase for a fourth straight year, but the Vancouver, Wash., native likely will have to win at least one of the final five regular-season races to do so. The reason for Biffle’s optimism is the fact that

Greg Biffle has been shut out this season and will need a win in the final five races to make the Chase for the fourth straight year. (John Clark/NASCAR This Week photo) Racing before deciding to remain where he is. Like teammates Edwards, Matt Kenseth and David Ragan, Biffle has spent his entire

to our company,” Biffle said. “I was a little skeptical, I suppose, whether he was going to, figuring this is August already.

“I’m relieved because people won’t ask me about it anymore. That’s why I’m most relieved about it and to have him back as a teammate. He does a good job getting his car set up and helps. I think we all help each other.” Roush recently changed Biffle’s crew chief, replacing Greg Erwin with Matt Puccia. Biffle, who won the August race at Pocono Raceway in 2010, managed an eighth-place finish this time, leaving him 13th in points. “Certainly we’ve been trying hard to win a race,” Biffle said. “We’ve come close a few times. ... Michigan, Bristol, Atlanta are all great tracks for us, and we feel like we can win at basically any of these racetracks. “I would have never guessed we’d be this far into the season without winning a race after the way we finished last year.” *** Monte Dutton covers motorsports for The Gaston (N.C.) Gazette. E-mail Monte at nascarthisweek@ yahoo.com. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

King Features Weekly Service

career with Roush, winning a Truck Series championship in 2000 and the (now) Nationwide Series in 2002. “I think it’s great that he (Edwards) is coming back

August 15, 2011

Edwards, the Cup point leader, has renewed his contract to remain at Roush Fenway. Edwards apparently seriously considered an offer from Joe Gibbs

Page 7

August 18, 2011

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August 18, 2011 FALLING FROM THE SKY (continued): • On Christmas Eve, 1971, LANSA Flight 508 from Lima, Peru, to Pucallpa, Peru, was struck by lightning at 21,000 feet. A fire started, and systems began failing, causing the pilots to loose control of the aircraft. The plane soon went into a dive. • The turbulent forces on the wings caused them to tear away from the aircraft as it came crashing down into a mountainous region of the Amazon. Amongst the debris, 17-yearold Juliane Margaret Koepcke regained consciousness after an unknown amount of time, still strapped in her seat. • All the other 91 people aboard — six crew members and 85 passengers, including Koepcke’s mother, were dead. Koepcke miraculously sustained only a broken collarbone. She spent the next 10 days alone and lost in the jungle with only a bag of candy for food. • Her father once told her to survive in the jungle, follow water. Koepcke waded from tiny streams to larger ones until on the tenth day, she made it to the bank of the Shebonya River where she saw a canoe tethered to the shoreline. • After climbing up an embankment, she found a hut. As it turned out, it belonged to a group of lumberjacks. They found her the next day. The incident was seen as a miracle of divine intervention in Peru, and free-fall statistics seem to support this thought. Her story has been the subject of two films, the most recent being a Werner Herzog documentary called “Wings of Hope.”

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3rd Quarter 2011 Week 33 Aug 14 - 20 Page 6

By Samantha Mazzotta

Fast Roof Patching

While organizing the attic, I noticed there was an area of the floor that looked like it had gotten wet recently. I looked at the roof above, but did not notice any holes. But there is a little water streak down the plywood. Is this a serious problem? — Carol H., New Bedford, Mass. If you address it quickly, it will not become a serious problem. Minor leaks in a roof can be patched fairly quickly. They’re often caused by damage to the shingles on top of the roof, which occurs over time due to debris strikes, ice buildup or just general stress from extremes of hot and cold. During the next rainstorm, go into the attic and note where the water is seeping. Follow the trail of water upward until you can see an entry point. That is the likely area of damage. Mark the spot clearly and brightly for now (put a piece of bright tape or tack a bright piece of paper over the spot). To repair, you’ll need to be able to access the rooftop safely, with safety harness, rope and ladder, and have a helper. If you’re not able to do this, contact a roofing professional to do the repair. If you can do it yourself, first re-mark the leaky area. From the attic, take a large (ten-penny) nail and drive it

straight upward through the bottom layer so that it juts out past the shingles above. (Don’t sink it in all the way, as you’ll need to remove it later.) Gather your repair materials: spare shingles, roofing cement, roofing nails, hammer and pry bar. Make your way safely to the rooftop, with your helper minding the ladder and safety rope. Locate the upward-jutting nail. Remove the nail and patch the hole with a dab of roofing cement. Inspect the shingle for damage. If it is very minor, like a ripped edge or small crack, it can be patched with roofing cement and a piece of spare shingle cut to fit. Or, you can completely remove the shingle, sliding it out carefully from the ones above and to the side, and slide in a replacement. Tack down on the top and sides with dabs of roofing cement. Tap in roofing nails along the top of the replacement shingle, holding the shingle above it up, then press the shingle above it back down into place. Secure the bottom of the shingle with a couple small dabs of cement underneath the flap. Send your questions or comments to ask@thisisahammer.com, or write This Is a Hammer, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

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“Inhalation injury” they call it, when simple breathing is dangerous because there’s some unknown toxin in the air. The New England Journal of Medicine recently reported on a study of veterans developing breathing problems after serving in Iraq and Afghanistan. “Exertional dyspnea” is medical lingo for shortness of breath, which is why 80 soldiers from Fort Campbell, Ky., wereCaesar sent to VanChicken derbilt University Salad PitasMedical Center: They were no longer We know that August and its ablehumidity to run 2rolls milesaround in the every year. But more often allotted than not,time. we still aren’t prepared those “dog Afterfor testing, halfdaysthe of summer.” How about group was diagnosed with a little pre-planning this time? Keep these ingrediconstrictive bronchiolitis, ents conveniently on hand narrowing of the for this quick and airway, easy Heat recipe. whichWave is rare in Then, healthy when the temperature and adults. The agesoar rangetoward was 23 humidity both 100, “cool a to 44,you’ll and allbewere fit. as Some cucumber”! had been exposed to dust 3 cups torn romaine storms and burn-pit smoke. lettuce 1 full cup diced Eleven of them, however, cooked chicken breast did not have any exposure 1/4 cup grated reduced- whatsoever. “The results of fat Parmesan cheese physical examination of the 1/2 cup fat-free chest were normal in all the mayonnaise 1 teaspoon lemon soldiers,” says the report. juice Until doctors got the lung 1 teaspoon dried onion flakes biopsy samples, that is. All 1/8 teaspoon black manner of gunk and goop pepper 2 pita bread rounds, (including “lacy black pig-

• Each serving: About 280 calories, 14g total fat (3g 185mg ©saturated), 2011 King Features Synd.,cholesInc. terol, 415mg sodium, 12g total carbs, 1g dietary fiber, 27g protein. For thousands of tripletested recipes, visit our website at www.goodhousekeeping.com/recipefinder/.

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Seared Steak with Minted Watermelon Inspired by the exotic flavors of China, this dish is packed with watermelon, cucumber and mint, which provide a cool contrast to savory grilled steak. 8 ounces thin rice noodles 1 1-pound) boneless 1-inch-thick beef sirloin steak Salt Pepper 1 shallot, finely chopped 1 stalk lemon grass, yellow and pale green part only, finely chopped 1 teaspoon sugar 1/4 cup fresh lime juice 1 tablespoon lower sodium fish sauce 1/2 small (3 cups) watermelon, rind removed, cut into 1/2-inch cubes 1/2 seedless English) cucumber, cut in half and thinly sliced 1/2 cup packed fresh mint leaves, finely chopped 1. Prepare outdoor grill for covered direct grilling

on medium. 2. Prepare noodles as label directs. Drain, rinse under cold water and drain again. 3. Season steak with 1/4 teaspoon each salt and freshly ground black pepper. Place steak on hot grill; cover. Cook 12 to 13 minutes for medium-rare or until desired doneness, turning once. Transfer steak to cutting board; let rest 10 minutes. 4. Meanwhile, in large bowl, stir shallot, lemongrass, sugar, lime juice and fish sauce until sugar dissolves. Thinly slice steak across the grain. Add to bowl, along with watermelon, cucumber and mint. Toss gently until well mixed. 5. Divide noodles among serving plates. Top with steak mixture and accumulated juices. Serves 4. • Each serving: About 430 calories, 8g total fat (3g saturated), 75mg cholesterol, 435mg sodium, 64g total carbohydrate, 2g dietary fiber, 26g protein. For thousands of tripletested recipes, visit our website at www.goodhousekeeping.com/recipefinder/. © 2011 Hearst Comm., Inc. All rights reserved

King Features Weekly Service

August 15, 2011

halved In a large bowl, combine romaine lettuce, chicken and Parmesan cheese. Add mayonnaise, lemon juice, onion flakes and black pepper. Mix well to combine. Spoon about 1 cup salad mixture into each pita half. Serve at once or cover and refrigerate until ready to serve. Serves 4. • Each serving equals: 186 calories, 2g fat, 17g protein, 25g carb., 455mg sodium, 2g fiber; Diabetic Exchanges: 2 Meat, 1 Starch, 1/2 Vegetable.

ment”) were found that did not show up on scans and physical examination, with tests negative for bacteria and fungus. The study says that, yes, those who were exposed to the sulfur mine fire smoke could be expected to have the problem. But what of those who had no exposure but who still have this condition? The concern, according to the researchers, is that Watermelon, whatever it wasand that caused Shrimp Feta the conditionSalad was also present for else. proteinGeteveryone this fresh, rich summer on the Since the studysalad officially table in just 20 minutes. ended, nine more in the 4 tablespoons group were diagnosed with prepared lemon and chive dressing constrictive bronchiolitis. 1 pound large shelled The study concludes: and deveined shrimp “Additional studies are 1 bag (5 to 6 ounces) mixed baby greens needed to evaluate the par 3 cup (from about ticulate matter observed 1 1/2 pounds with in rind) diced (1 1/2- many biopsy samples inch chunks) seedless obtained from these sol watermelon 2 ounce (1/3 cup) diers.” crumbled feta cheese To read the whole study, go 1. In 12-inch nonstick to www.nejm.org search skillet, heat 1and tablespoon on medium 1 minfordressing Constrictive Bronchiute. Add shrimp and cook 6 olitis Soldiers Returning to 8inminutes or until shrimp areIraq opaque from and throughout, Afghanistan.stirring occasionally. Write Freddy Groves in 2. to Meanwhile, in large bowl, toss mixed greens, care of King Features Weekdiced watermelon and remaining tablespoons ly Service, P.O.3Box 536475, dressing until evenly coatOrlando, FL 32853-6475, ed. To serve, divide salad 4 serving and or among send e-mail to plates column top with shrimp and crumreply@gmail.com. bled feta.

—23—

HOLLYWOOD — James Franco got to host the Oscars with Anne Hathaway because he’s got it all going on. We predict he’s the next big Hollywood superstar ... move over George Clooney! Franco, 33, began his career in TV in “Freaks & Geeks” and won a Golden Globe for playing “James Dean” in the TV biopic. The “Spider-Man” trilogy led to “The Pineapple Express,” the award-winning “Milk” and a best-actor Oscar nomination for “127 Hours.” In his spare time, Franco received permission from UCLA to take up to 62 course credits per quarter (19 is the norm), received an MFA from Columbia University, went to NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts for film making and Brooklyn College for fiction writing. He’s currently getting his Ph.D in English at Yale and soon will attend the Rhode Island School of Design. In 2012 he’ll attend the University of Houston to get his Ph.D in literature and creative writing (only 20 of 400 applicants were accepted). Franco has “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” just out, and he produced and starred in “The Stare” with Winona Ryder. He direct-

ed and starred in a nine-day shoot of “Sal,” the biopic of Sal Mineo (Oscar nominated for “Rebel Without a Cause” and “Exodus”), with Val Lauren as Mineo, to be released in 2013. He’s currently filming “Oz: The Great and Powerful,” based on “The Wonderful Wizard of Oz” (written in 1900),

Anne Hathaway, James Franco about its creator, L. Frank Baum. He’ll direct and star in “The Night Stalker,” about serial killer Richard Ramirez, star in “The Iceman” with Michael Shannon and direct a film version of William Faulkner’s “As I Lay Dying.” Franco acquired the rights to Stephen Elliot’s “The Adderall Diaries,” which he’ll adapt, star in and direct, and he’ll be on Broadway next season in a revival of Tennes-

see Williams’ “Sweet Bird of Youth” with Nicole Kidman. In his spare time, Franco drops into “General Hospital” to play Robert “Franco” Frank (coming up in September for an extended run). Small wonder he’s got little time for romance. He broke up with his actress girlfriend of five years, Ahna O’Reilly, saying that his interest in education came between them! Talk about cracking the books! Franco’s Oscar co-host, Anne Hathaway, will be Batwoman in “The Dark Knight Rises,” currently shooting in Pittsburgh with Christian Bale (again Batman), Michael Caine, Gary Oldman, Morgan Freeman, “La Vie En Rose” Oscar-winner Marion Catillard, “3rd Rock from the Sun” alum Joseph GordonLevitt, Liam Neeson and Matthew Modine. With a cast like that, it sounds like she’s having more fun cracking the whip (as Batwoman) than the books like James Franco! Send letters to Tony Rizzo’s Hollywood, 8306 Wilshire Blvd., No. 362, Beverly Hills, CA 90211. © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc.

August 15, 2011

What Was In the Air?

King Features Features Weekly Weekly Service King Service

PLATINUM TATTOO’S You Think It. We Ink It! August15, 15, 2011 2011 August

for it to be free, or that you’ll be limited to a certain number of debit-card transactions per month, or that your ATM transactions are no longer free, or that you’ll no longer receive a paper statement without paying for it. However, that same probDebit-Card lem for card issuers might Changes get you a discount from By Samantha Mazzotta merchants, especially for A short five years ago, big-ticket items. If you shop banks were pushing us tostraight upward throughbusinessthe locally at smaller Roof useFast our debit cards. Rewardsbottom layerhave so athat it juts es, you better chance programs with points, flyerout past Patching the shingles of asking for andabove. getting a miles, cash back — it all(Don’t sink it since in all the themerchant way, discount, While organizing added up in our favor. as you’ll to remove it won’tneed be paying high swipe the attic, I noticed Now, however, if youlater.) fees and percentages of the there wasa andebit areacard of the have that’s Gather purchase cost. Always ask. your repair materifloor it partthat of alooked rewardslike program, Banksshingles, and credit unions roofing hadyou gotten wethave recently. I als: spare might a limited with assets less than $10 bilcement, roofing nails, hamlooked at the amount of roof time above, to cash in lion are exempt, and if you mer and pry bar. Make your butthose did rewards. not notice anydebit If your safely toto athesmaller rooftop,bank, holes. there is abank, littleyourwayswitch cardBut is with a big you might get aminding better deal with your helper water streak down the rewards program is probably on the fees that the big banks the ladder and safety plywood. a serious going toIsbethis cancelled — if it will surely impose.rope. the upward-jutting hasn’t been problem? — already. Carol H., LocateBefore you let yourself The reason New Bedford, Mass.for thesenail.be pushed toward putting Remove the nail and patch changes, the banks, If yousayaddress it isthe hole purchases credit with a on dab your of roofthequickly, Durbinit Amendment. card because of a potential will not ing cement. The legislation puts a cap rewards program, rethink become a serious problem. the shingle for on the per-transaction cost Inspect your plan. While new laws Minor leaks in a roof can If it is very minor, that banks charge merchantsdamage. are in place for credit-card be for patched a ripped edgehave or small each fairly swipe quickly. of a debitlike fees, you still to pay the They’re often caused by card, down from 44 centscrack, it can be patched money back. damage to the shingles to 21 cents per swipe, pluswith roofing The newcement debit and carda law on atop of the roof, which percentage of the transac-piece of spare shingle cut to just takes effect in October, occurs over No timemore duemassive to fit. Or, tion total. you can completely in time for holiday shopdebris strikes, ice buildup millions moving into cardremove the shingle, slidping. or just general issuers handsstress in thefrom form ofing it out carefully from the David Uffington regrets extremes hotmeans and cold. swipe offees no moreones above and to the side, that cannot personally During the next rainstorm, rewards-program benefitsand slidehe in areader replacement. questions, go for intoyou. the attic and note Tackanswer down on the top andthem but will incorporate whereBanks the water is seeping. are looking forsides with dabs of roofhis column whenever Follow the trail of water new ways to recoup the losting into cement. Tap in roofing Write to him in upward untilIfyou money. youcan getsee an an infor-nailspossible. along the top of the care of King Features Weekmation entry point.leaflet That isintheyour like-bankreplacement shingle, holdly Service, P.O. Box 536475, statement, readMark it. Youthe could ly area of damage. ing the shingle above it up, thatandyour free for check- Orlando, FL 32853-6475, spotlearn clearly brightly then press the shingle above account longer or send e-mail to columnrenowing (put a piecewill of no bright down into place. ply@gmail.com. that piece you’llofneedit back tapebeor free, tack aorbright Secure the bottom of the to over maintain certain balances © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. paper the spot). shingle with a couple small To repair, you’ll need to dabs of cement underneath be able to access the rooftop the flap. safely, with safety harness, Send your questions or rope and ladder, and have comments to ask@thisisaa helper. If you’re not able to do this, contact a roof- hammer.com, or write This ing professional to do the Is a Hammer, c/o King Features Weekly Service, P.O. repair. If you can do it yourself, Box 536475, Orlando, FL first re-mark the leaky area. 32853-6475. From the attic, take a large © 2011 King Features Synd., Inc. (ten-penny) nail and drive it

Page 9

August 18, 2011

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instead of concentrating on the short run, look toward potential benefits down the road. SCORPIO (October 23 to November 21) You have a gift for reviving projects that seem beyond repair. Use that same ability to restore a relationship that seems to have turned from loving to lifeless. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 to December 21) Expect to be asked to use your combined wisdom and humor to resolve a problem. After all, folks not only value your advice, they also like how you give it. CAPRICORN (December 22 to January 19) Most people consider you solid and steady. But you also can be quite capricious (which is a Latin word for “describing the behavior of Goats”) when it suits your needs. AQUARIUS (January 20 to February 18) People treat you as you wish to be treated. So if you want a change in your relationship, make it happen. Also expect someone to reveal some long-held secrets. PISCES (February 19 to March 20) Stay with the decision you made, despite a sudden torrent of advice to the contrary from wellmeaning people. Remember: You know your needs better than anyone. BORN THIS WEEK: You like things tidy, with no loose ends. You also enjoy research and would make an excellent investigative reporter or scientist.

• It was the 37th president of the United States, Richard M. Nixon, who made the following sage — and somehow appropriate — observation: “Sure there are dishonest men in local government. But there are dishonest men in national government too.” • Pasta has been around since 5,000 B.C., and it was invented in China, not Italy. • If you’re planning a visit to the United Kingdom, you might want to keep in mind this rather obscure statute: It’s illegal to stand within 100 yards of the reigning monarch if you don’t have socks on. • A groundhog can move 700 pounds of dirt in a single day. • When the two-and-onehalf-hour finale of the groundbreaking television show “M*A*S*H” aired on Feb. 28, 1983, advertisers paid a hefty $450,000 for a single 30-second spot. That was $50,000 more than the same spot cost at the Super Bowl that year. • We all know what a disaster is, but did you

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• There are many different classifications of laws. Contract law governs both simple and complex business transactions. Property law We outlines the rights and obligations concerning the ownership Pay of realOFF estate (land and buildings) as well as movable objects like cars, Everyone! televisions, etc. • Financial assets are overseen by trust laws, while tort law allows people to seek compensation if their rights are infringed upon or their property is damaged. Criminal law, also known as penal law, protects us by giving the government the ability and authority to prosecute someone that harms another person’s rights or property.

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ARIES (March 21 to April 19) The typically tidy Ram or Ewe might want to butt out until things are settled on the home front. But get involved and let your Ovine sense of order help restore domestic tranquility. TAURUS (April 20 to May 20) The Bovine’s flair for fine-tuning complicated fiscal dealings comes in handy when an unexpected financial problem arises. Stay with it until it’s resolved to your satisfaction. GEMINI (May 21 to June 20) Family aspects remain strong. There might be some unresolved difficulties, but continued attempts to smooth things over eventually prove to be successful. A major purchase looms. CANCER (June 21 to July 22) A promise that was made but never kept suddenly reemerges in your life. You now have to decide if you’re still interested in what it offers or if you’ve moved past it. LEO (July 23 to August 22) Romance comes to unattached Leos and Leonas who have been waiting for Cupid to target them for far too long. Domestic purr-fection is also enhanced for paired Felines. VIRGO (August 23 to September 22) You need to take a much-needed break from that demanding project before too much energydraining tension sets in. And don’t be ashamed to ask for help. LIBRA (September 23 to October 22) Change makes demands that you might find unwelcome at this time. But

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• The Babylonian king Hammurabi is credited as the first in history to record a set of written laws in about 1786 B.C. They are known as the Code of Hammurabi.

King Features Weekly Service

Pay OFF Everyone!

August 15, 2011

GAURANTEED CREDIT transfer your current title today andLOWEST get We pawnNO PROBLEM We $50 to $100.00 free ca$h Pay We doOFF Everyone!

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• Everyone and everything lives by some kind of law. Even if you lived on a deserted island by yourself, your life and activities would still be ruled by the law of gravity and other natural, universal laws. Even ants live by their own set of laws.

•

YOUR CAR IS YOUR CREDIT... YOU KEEP YOUR CAR... NO Motorcycles!

Referral What are laws, and how do they govern our lives? Here is a brief look at the intended meanFees ing and purpose of laws.

know where the word came from? The base of the word is “aster,” which is Latin for “star.” The word “disaster” originally meant “an unfavorable aspect of a star,” reflecting the ancient notion that the motions of heavenly bodies affected terrestrial events. • Baseball players didn’t have numbers on their uniforms until 1929, and it was the New York Yankees that were the first to adopt the practice. • In the early 18th century, newspapers were not cheap, but the stories published therein were often people’s only link to the events of the day. Since they were so coveted, newspapers were often brought as a gift when a gentleman was calling on a lady friend, much as candy or flowers might be brought in a different era. *** Thought for the Day: “No one really listens to anyone else, and if you try it for a while you’ll see why.” — Mignon McLaughlin

We Pay to OFF the Leading Everyone!

arrest & Conviction for the theft of: 1 ~ 5 x 10 Utility Trailer with wood floor 1 ~ 6 x 12 Utility Trailer with wood floor

Stolen from Fun Carts of Opelika july 27, 2011, between the hours of 12am and 5am

call (334) 745-0660

www.Tidbitscv.com

M&M

Page 11

August 18, 2011

RECYCLING, INC. Paying Cash for all scrap metal We buy junk cars

#1 Copper.................................................................... $2.80/lb. #2 Copper.................................................................... $2.60/lb. #1 Insulated................................................................ $1.25/lb. #2 Insulated................................................................ $0.75/lb. Cans............................................................................ $0.45/lb. Aluminum Wheels...................................................... $0.50/lb. Car Batteries.............................................................. $0.13/lb. Steel.......................................................................... $0.11/lb. Cars...(MUST HAVE TITLES WITH ALL CARS)...... $0.11/lb,

(334) 209-0193 980 Lee Road 10 • Auburn, AL

NEW LOCATION (706) 682-2525 Lowest Price in Town on ALL Parts Specializing in Honda Parts

946 Morris Road Columbus, GA 31906

TO PLACE A LOCAL, REGIONAL OR NATIONAL AD CALL 706-332-0090 OR 334-524-8883 Auto Parts & Accessories

Business Opportunity

1998 S-10 Pick-up, Parting Out, Good Engine and Transmission 334.524.7005 1999 Mercury 4.6L Engine and trasmission for sale, will separate and install if needed 334.524.7005

FOR ALL YOUR AUTO REPAIR NEEDS COME TO

BEST FOR LESS

(334) 524-7005 2005 Z-71 Passenger Doors, Hood, Front Bumper for sale 334.524.7005 2005 Z-71 Radiator Support, Loaded with condensor & radiator 334.524.7005 2005 Z-71 Transfer Case, Low Miles 45k, $750 334-524-7005 65 Mustang Parts Wanted (706) 573-5235 97_to_99 Chrysler Sebring Aluminum Wheels & Tires, $400 334.524.7005 Mechanic’s Special, 2000 Dodge Dakota pick-up needs engine, $1,500 O.B.O. 334.524.7005 TOYOTA ENGINES. 22RE, 3VZE, 5VZE, 3RZ, 2RZ. New 22RE heads. Parting out Toyota 4RUNNERS and trucks. www. toyotatruckpart.com. 1-877484-7888.

Accepting Bids on 2002 Ford Ranger and 2000 Buick LaSabre at East Alabama Credit, Inc. 334-826-0166

Employment Cars 1980 Camaro Dragster, 7 Second Bracket Car, 383 Stroker Nice!!! $6500 MUST SEE 334-524-7005 2007 Nissan_Maxima_SE 81k miles, sunroof, cloth seats, spoiler, and great ride!!! $15,900. Call: 334 887-8663 2007 Mitsubishi_Eclipse_GT 25k miles, V6, well cared for, fun daily driver car for the money!!! $16,900. Call: 334 887-8663 2008 Nissan_Altima_2.5S 74k miles, very clean, spoiler, sunroof, all power options and ready for the road!!! $16,700. Call: 334 887-8663 1986 Chevrolet_Camero_RS Excellent Condition!! Needs New Motor and Transmission $1200 OBO Call 334-321-8576 97 Mercedes S500, Fully Loaded, Ready to Ride, $6500 (334) 524-7005

Sales_Position Open Upto $72,000/gross Commission with excellent benefits package E-mail Resume to r821@ claytonhomes.com. No Telephone Calls!!! DRIVERS: CDLTRAININGNOW.COM is now accepting applications for driver trainees! 16 Day Company sponsored CDL training now available! No experience or credit required. 1-800-991-7531 #3130 www. CDLTrainingnow.com PROPERTY MANAGEMENT Teams of 2 (two) Needed! Salary, housing, utilities and bonuses. Tools and transportation a must. Willing to relocate. 1-866-553-3613. Call Monday- Friday, 9:00am5:00pm Central Time. No Sunday Calls!

Farm & Ranch POLE BARNS, Open or Enclosed, All Sizes, Financing Available. Call (334) 6168028.

2006 Infiniti G 35 4 dr Sedan leather and loaded, $15,500 334-737-6076

Lots/Land/Acreages

2000 Lexus ES 300, leather, loaded, sunroof, great car $8,200. 334-737-6076

WANTED LAND IN LEE, CHAMBERS AND MACON COUNTY..FOR MANUFACTURED HOMES.. NEEDED IMMEDIATELY!! CALL 334-749-2923

2007 Suzuki Forenza, Good MPG, clean, great deal at $6,500 334-737-6076

Try Tidbits

Try Tidbits Classifieds

1+/- Acre in Smith Station, will finance if you qualify (334) 468-2044

Manufactured Home 2005 Fleetwood 14x72, 2 bed., 2 bath. Fenced yard/front porch. Located in Cotton Creek in Auburn Contact Kami Butler Scarborough Dabwood Realty, Inc. (334) 657-4372 4 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048 3 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048

Miscellaneous THE OCEAN Corp. 10840 Rockley Road, Houston, Texas 77099. Train for a New Career. *Underwater Welder. Commercial Diver. *NDT/ Weld Inspector. Job Placement Assistance. Financial Aid available for those who qualify. 1-800-321-0298.

FOR ALL YOUR AUTO REPAIR NEEDS COME TO

BEST FOR LESS

(334) 524-7005 4 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048 3 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048

THE COURTYARDS at Auburn AN APARTMENT COMMUNITY

$45 Tow Inside Columbus City Limits with this Coupon Only!!!

You Call... We Haul!!!

Sportsman’s Barber Shop y

onl

• • •

Includes: Haircut Hot Lather Neck Shave Hot Towel

Must Present Ad. Exp. 12/31/10

(334) 826-0620

1655 S. College Auburn, AL 36832 Behind Zaxby’s Mon.- Fri 8am-6pm - Sat. 8am-2pm

• Pet Friendly • 2 Swimming Pools • 24 Hour Fitness Center Call Today!!!! 1-888-434-2770

420 North Dean Rd., Auburn, AL www.TheCourtyardsatAuburn.com

DIVORCE $99.00 Covers Children, Custody, Property & Debts. Uncontested. Satisfaction Guaranteed! Unlimited Customer Support. Call 24/hrs. Free Information! 1-800-250-8142.

Motorcycles 2006 Honda Shadow $3800 Serious Enquiries Only 334524-7005 WANTED JAPANESE MOTORCYCLES KAWASAKI: Z1-900, KZ900, KZ1000, Z1R, Kawasaki Triples, GT380, GS400, CB750, (1969-75) Cash Paid, Nationwide Pickup, 1-800-7721142, 1-310-721-0726. usa@ classicrunners.com DIVORCE $99.00 Covers Children, Custody, Property & Debts. Uncontested. Satisfaction Guaranteed! Unlimited Customer Support. Call 24/hrs. Free Information! 1-877-861-8585.

Pets & Supplies BLUE PITBULL Puppies For Sale. $800.00 256-621-2173 Jason Dana’s Dog Training - Private Dog Training Lessons - Obedience Training, Puppy Training, Babies & Dogs Program. Call for more Info and a Free Evaluation. 334749-9913

Real Estate 4 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048 3 Bedroom - 2 Bath Call 334749-7048

3 BED 1 bath home! $750 down and $350 a month! 211 Empire Rd., 36110. Owner Financing! Call 334-209-4555.

Rental Properties Office Suite up to 5 Offices and Conference Room, Utilities and Internet Included. Completely Renovated Call 334-705-5466

RV’s 1991 Winnebago Chiefton 38,000 miles, Excellent Condition, Includes Cover, $19,000 obo Call 334.329.0679 or 334.826.0166 2010 38’ 5th Wheel Loaded w/2 Air, Washer/Dryer, Queen Bed,and 3 slide out rooms $35,000 OBO Call (513) 252-6791

NOW OPEN

Best Prices in town on all Minor Repairs!

Starters • Alternators • Brakes • Timing Belts • CV Axles

FREE Towing if Repairs are Completed in Our Shop!!!

1988 Ford_F-350 four door duallywith a 351W 5Speed with Granny Low Gear. Great Work Truck $2500 OBO Call 334-321-8576 90 Catering Truck, Stainless Steel, Must See to Appreciate, $5,500 O.B.O. (334) 705-0000

Fully shelved and tool box inside. Must See!! $5,500 OBO (334) 524-7005 97 Chevrolet S-10 Pick-up, 135k Miles, $3,500 Call (334) 468-2044

Vehicle Repair & Services

Tools

95 Dodge Caravan, GREAT Work Truck, $1500, OBO (334) 705-0000

New Electric Start 9000 Tahoe generator with Honda motor, $2500 (334) 468-2044

98 Chevy Utility Van, 21 FT, Great for Handyman Work Vehicle, Body All Aluminum and Fiber glass Top, Must See and Drive to Appreciate, $4500 (334) 524-7005

Save on your auto repairs with the convenience of door to door service! ASE Certified with guaranteed lower prices. If you don’t have time to go to the shop, let the shop come to you! Call Lesley Smitherman 334-750-8724

2003 Jeep Grand Cherokee Limited, 108,000 Miles, Nice Car, $6,500 334-737-6076

WANT TO BUY

Trucks 1997 Ford Expedition, Eddie Bauer Edition, Leather, Fully Loaded, Clean, Excellent Condition -A Steal!!!!! 334.338.0055 or 334.826.0166 2000 Explorer $3995 Good Condition $800 Down, You Ride (334) 524-7005

1998 Ford Ranger pick-up, regular cab, automatic transmission, good tires, 103,000 miles. Cal Joey for price 334-737-6076

2003 S-10 Custom Pick-up 51,000 Miles $5,500, O.B.O. Must See 334.524.7005

1998 Chevy Utility Van, All Aluminum body, Runs like new, Great Truck for Handyman,

90 Dodge_Dakota Pick-up, Good Working Truck, V-6, Runs Good, $1,200 334.524.7005

We Buy JUNK CARS Running or Not

Top $$$ For Your Used Vehicles Will Come to You to Evaluate Your Car

(334) 524-7005

WANTED: DIABETIC Test Strips. We buy any brand. Unexpired. We pay up to $20 plus shipping. “Money In Your Pocket” Call 8am-8pm 1-866368-2269

Classifieds

Advertise Locally, Regionally, or

Nationally for as Low as $5.25 a

Week Call 706.332.0090 or 334.524.8883

LAWS (continued): • Labor laws and safety standards ensure that our workplaces are safe. Restaurants and grocery stores we frequent are governed by health codes that keep us safe from spoiled, dirty or diseased food products that could make us sick. • Written works, movies, music and other forms of expression are protected from being copied by copyright laws. And when using the Internet, we are subject to emerging laws governing this new medium. • America came into existence due to a dispute over laws. Whether or not the laws of the British Empire should apply to the colonies in North America was the question, and it found colonists and the crown staunchly adhering to opposing answers. The result was war and the American Revolution.

LOCATED NEXT TO ORIGINAL JOHNNY BRUSCO’S NY PIZZA 3rd Quarter 2011 Week 33 Aug 14 - 20 Page 8

0% Financing for up to 12 Months

• Today in the United States, the Constitution outlines our most basic rights and is the basis for the creation of law, the protection of human rights and the election of political representatives. • Society is not always in agreement with the laws that regulate our conduct or how the institutions that implement the laws behave. Oftentimes, we are in rebellion against some of their provisions. • The Greek philosopher Aristotle is credited with saying, “Even when laws have been written down, they ought not always to remain unaltered.” •

As the population grows and technology advances, the need for ever-changing laws exists. New and improved rules are written every day. One of the best designs of the American legal system is the power of the individual to collectively make or change laws through the right to vote.

We’re Dealing at Carl gregory of auburn 11 DAKOTA

10 Fusion Hybrid

07 Ford Edge

06 VW Beetle

10 Charger SXT

1300 MILES

Gas Saver

1101012A Leather & More

Leather, Auto

3.5L High Output Engine

$18,998 $23,990 $18,995 $12,995 19,888 06 Highlander

10 Kia Optima

07 Tahoe LTZ

07 Freestar Van

10 Impala LT

Limited, Leather

LX, Sharp

Leather, 3rd Row, Loaded

Family Ready

Sharp Car, AP3427

$17,995 $16,988 $25,995 $10,999 $15,999 08 Mustang

06 Dodge 2500

08 Lincoln Town Car

10 Impala LT

10 Ford Fusion SEL

Leather, Auto,

Low Miles, Diesel

Loaded

Sharp Car AP 3434

Leather, Roof & More

$16,999 $20,888 $22,995 $15,999 $19,995 CARL GREGORY FORD • LINCOLN • OF AUBURN www.CARLGREGORYFLM.com

AUBURN ALABAMA

(334) 887-8571