Two Men I Loved

ed as well: many companies push the image of men “needing” to be muscular and strong (usually with six-pack abs). That has given rise to surgeries that artificially create visible abdominal muscles. Even nonbinary people face certain beauty standards in which they must appear a certain, often androgynous way. Society may assert that a “too masculine” or “too feminine” nonbinary person is not valid in their gender identity and thus, their existence. In essence, people of all backgrounds can be and usually are affected by this sort of “flaw culture” in which companies and society attempt to present certain things as “undesirable.” Clearly, the repercussions of this culture do not discriminate.

As many people have most likely noticed, with advertising and media representation, beauty standards have been molded into something virtually unattainable. Not only that, but as I explained, we are constantly reminded of this. That is why body positivity—especially body positivity that encompasses all physical characteristics—is so important. In a world that constantly tells us we are not enough, body positivity is about saying that we are more than enough. Body positivity is about loving the tone of your skin, your natural facial structure, your body type, and even things like body hair.

Something vital to note, however, is that there is nothing inheretly wrong with wanting to, for example, straighten your hair or put on a bit of muscle mass. Even more permanent alterations such as plastic surgery are not inherently “bad”—if it is something that will make you happier because you want it (not because a company or society says you “need” it), that is your decision. If someone wants to alter their nose because they would feel more confident and happier that way, that is their decision. If someone wishes to lose or gain weight because they are unhealthy at their current weight, that is again their decision. On the other hand, if someone harms themselves through trying to lose weight, change their skin tone, or something else, that is a huge issue. Similarly, it is harmful if someone feels there is something “wrong” with them unless they straighten their hair or use a waist trainer. Rather than trying to change because you feel you aren’t enough, body positivity can help you evolve and grow to become an even more amazing, beautiful, and happier you. Though easier said than done, being positive about your appearance is the way to directly push back against all these companies and society demanding you change the way you look. The reality is, there is absolutely nothing “wrong” with anyone’s appearance.

Ultimately, body positivity arose from the efforts of fat rights activists decades ago, and we owe a lot to them as well as to those women of color and LGBTQ+ people who helped spread body positivity. Especially in today’s world where “everything is a flaw,” it is important to consider body positivity as something that encompasses all physical characteristics of a person rather than just their weight. It should be about one’s body as a whole—every single aspect of it. Anyone can feel insecure at times, and it’s completely understandable in today’s world. However, society and greedy companies can’t change the reality that your body has gotten you through literally everything in your life. Your body is your lifelong partner and constantly doing its best to keep you alive and healthy. Your body may not be able to talk to you, but your body is always supporting you—no matter what it looks like. That’s why you should support it, too, and irrespective of whether you want to change it, be positive about your body.