UWeekly - Sept. 21, 2011 by Jess Pendleton

CASh giVeAwAyS eVeRy weeK

photo: k. adam stockstill

thE indEPEndEnt voicE of ut austin

sEPt 21, 2011

www.uwEEklyaustin.coM

Through their first successful decade of live music

THURSDA

Y 9.22.11

photo: young the giAnt: K. Adam Stockstill

SeptembeR 21, 2011

005

mtVâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Real world

012

Fantasy football:

019

you tell us:

020

living local:

027

uweekly sits down

casting in Austin this weekend

play, trade, or bench

pluckers vs. wingzone

our guide to local bands

with Secret Sisters

Gowalla debuts UT Stamps: Hit or Miss Does anyone really care about your check-ins? Even for those of you who are less fortunate and cannot afford to get the internet on your phone, you still probably know what check-ins are: those pesky little notices on your Facebook news feed that announce when one of your friends is at a specific location. In other words, check-ins are social media updates that are supported by platforms such as Facebook, Twitter and Foursquare which allow users to post where they are geographically. It’s geospatial blogging, if you will, with a touch of a button. Gowalla, an Austin-run site that allows you to log in using Facebook and Twitter then “check in” at physical locations to earn virtual stamps, has debut custom UT stamps. To social-media lovers like advertising junior Elana Black, devices

Black, her brother, also adds that he doesn’t understand people who check-in religiously. While he doesn’t currently engage in checkingin, he claims that if he did he’d only “check in at cool places, not at school.” Will McCaskill, a business honors freshman, doesn’t see what the point is to checking in. “I don’t do it because I don’t care,” said McCaskill. “I don’t understand why other people would care.” Bryan Stankus, an RTF sophomore, also doesn’t buy the hype surrounding checking in, and said, “Your close group of friends know where you’re going. Why do you think everyone else wants to know?” To some, the general idea behind geospatial

“Geospatial blogging, if you will, with a touch of a button.”

Gowalla Stamps for UT like the Gowalla stamp enhance her relationship with peers; yet others wonder if there’s any point to letting people know where you just ate lunch. “If I’m at some place cool, I want to show friends where I’ve been,” said Black. “It’s kind of cool to show off that you’re at some really cool concert or at an airport. You want your friends to know you’re in New York,” added Black. As Black further explains, the only places that are worth checking in online are ones that are worthwhile, trendy or interesting. The library, then, would not be a place to check in at. Ethan

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

updates are so that you and your friends can gather at a single location spontaneously. “It’s kind of cool, I guess. It shows where you’re going; maybe others will find me too,” said petroleum engineering freshman Lindsay Caram. Luckily for Gowalla, they made stamps that include some of UT’s most social spots, such as the Texas Union and Memorial Stadium, leaving the Academic Annex out of it. For now, it seems that check-ins and virtual stamps collected from those check-ins are serving their users well, while leaving others wondering what the big deal is.

Amanda Chappel

The University of Texas at Austin

Bass Concert Hall

Darrell K Royal-Texas Memorial Stadium

UT Austin Visitor Center

Etter-Harbin Alumni Center Blanton Museum of Art Harry Ransom Center Lady Bird Johnson Wildflower Center

Student Activity Center Texas Union The Tower

Get Real thE casting dirEctors of Mtv’s rEal World will conduct a casting call for the show’s 27th seasons at the Hooter’s on Riverside this Saturday from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Shooting for the 26th season just wrapped up in San Diego and the network is turning its attention to the next crop of 20 somethings who will occupy a house together for five months. Damon Furberg, the show’s casting director, has been with the show since the first Las Vegas season in 2002. Furberg will oversee the casting call on Saturday. “When you’re casting a reality show you never know what you’re going to get because you’re dealing with real people who are just going to do what they’re going to do,” Furberg said. “Obviously we

do our job the best we can but there’s an element of luck involved in there sometimes and every now and then it comes together just right.” According to a press release for the casting call, Furberg and his team are looking for people who “have challenges living an everyday life that

“They still have to be a good cast member in their own right,” he said. The show is entering its 27th season and has already been picked up by MTV for a 28th season. The first episode aired in 1992 and featured a group of eight strangers whose every move was filmed by camera crews. Nearly 20 years later, not much has changed about the show. Furberg believes this consistency has allowed the show its longevity. “There’s a generation of MTV viewers who have never known a world without Real World,” he said. “Despite the changes that introducing different cast members brings,

When you’re casting a reality show you never know what you’re going to get because you’re dealing with real people who are just going to do what they’re going to do. most take for granted.” Furberg said it is great when he runs across a person with an interesting story, but a good story does not necessarily guarantee an accepted application.

E H T F O HOME MACHINE

G N I T A R E N E G DRINK STIN.COM U

KLYA WWW.UWEE

AUSTIN

it’s still basically the same show that it was at the very beginning. There’s a comfort in that. People look at it, I don’t want to sound too corny, but I think people look at it as an old friend or a family member.” The show’s formula has remained surprisingly unchanged, save for one element.

Furberg said he and his team always look for people whose viewpoints and stories have not been told on the show before. “I always try and put it out there as much as possible that we are looking for all different types. We never know what’s going to work until someone puts it in front of us. People say ‘Well I’m not like person X or Y so why should I try out?” I would hate to see people eliminate themselves from contention for that.” Furberg insists he is open to anyone’s application, but there are a few ways to ensure an application will not be chosen. “You always get the person who shows up drunk and behaves like an idiot,” he said. “That’s not attractive to us. I want to stress that.” Furberg was especially unimpressed by one prospective cast member who showed up to a casting call wearing nothing but elephant underwear. “I thought ‘yeah, if you’re personality was strong enough, you probably wouldn’t have felt like you needed to do that.’ That’s kind of what you encounter a lot of times. People trying to get your attention with gimmickry or bad behavior. You always feel like that person is trying to cover up for not being interesting.” The Hooters on Riverside is located at 425 W Riverside Dr, Austin, TX 78704.

bRett thoRne

College Rankings a Mixed Bag for Texas Universities photo: eli watson

dEPEnding on whoM you ask, the University of Texas is either the 45th best university in the country, or the 186th. Texas A&M University is either the 58th, or it’s the 178th. The practice of ranking colleges and universities has become pervasive, but interpreting them can be difficult since no two publications take the same approach. The U.S. News & World Report released its annual list, arguably the most influential (and one of the most controversial, particularly among university administrators)on Sep. 13. Here’s a sampling of how Texas institutions fared on the list of best national universities: Rice University is 17th, UT is 45th, A&M is 58th, Southern Methodist University is 62nd, Baylor University is 75th, Texas Christian University is 97th, University of Texas-Dallas is 143rd and Texas Tech University is 160th. For those keeping score, that’s a bump up in the rankings for A&M, Baylor and TCU (from 63rd, 79th, and 99th, respectively). The rankings of UT, Rice, and UT-Dallas stayed level from last year. And SMU and Texas Tech both dropped slightly (from 56th and 159th). It’s a big difference, for example, from the recent rankings from Forbes, in which UT was 186th, A&M was 178th, SMU was 123rd, the private University of Dallas was 103rd, and Rice was 28th. Different still are the rankings from Washington Monthly, which put A&M at 15th, UT at 19th, Rice

of professors, percentage of alums giving money, as well as on reputation. Ours is very much outcomes based, especially student satisfaction and post-gradation success of students in a vocational sense of the word.” Washington Monthly, meanwhile, ranks universities based on “their contribution to the public good” in the areas of social mobility, research and service. Sometimes the ranking process can get contentious. Of Texas’ performance in his rankings, Vedder said, “It’s not a picture of distinction. It’s a picture of a number of high-quality schools that are not quite in the

The University of Texas is either the 45th best university in the country, or the 186th.

FACEBOOK US! fac eb oo k.c om /uw ee kly au stin we ekly cas h give aw ays

know what’s going in th e au sti n ar ea

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

at 22nd and Baylor at 80th. Others putting out college rankings include Newsweek, QS, Gawker (sort of), TheBestColleges.org and many others. No matter which ranking system one prefers, they all require a fair amount of work on the part of the universities being ranked. David Wenger, director of public affairs for UT’s McCombs School of Business, said his office responds to about 30 different rankers, each with its own methodology, over the course of a year. “It’s a massive amount of information, all of which has to be somewhat customized,” he said, noting that one member of his team spends about 60 percent of his time focused on the task. Richard Vedder, the Ohio University economist who does the Forbes undergraduate rankings, said of the U.S. News approach, “Theirs is based more on inputs used to produce educational services, such as class size, salaries

top ranks.” It’s an analysis that is unlikely to be received warmly by those that criticized a report by Vedder from earlier in the year contending that UT-Austin faculty members are not particularly productive. After Vedder’s rankings came out, Jenifer Sarver, a spokeswoman for one such group — the Texas Coalition for Excellence in Higher Education — wrote in UT’s alumni magazine, The Alcalde, “Mr. Vedder continues to do Texas, our universities, and the citizens of our state a disservice by completely disregarding the positive and proactive efforts our universities are continually undertaking in their drive to deliver excellence and quality in higher education.” (Some tried to cry foul, since The Alcalde simultaneously trumpeted Forbes’ 17th-inthe-nation ranking of the McCombs School of Business. But Vedder has nothing to do with the

business school rankings.) As for the U.S. News method, Texas Higher Education Commissioner Raymund Paredes recently told legislators, “The only thing I pay attention to [in them] is peer assessment. I don’t think the other metrics U.S. News & World Report uses are accurate or meaningful.” Earlier this year, in an interview with the Tribune, former UT dean John Silber argued that the U.S. News rankings are “so bogus, so dishonest, so fundamentally fraudulent that you fight against an impossible situation.” Wenger said it was “almost impossible” to accurately rank something as complex as an academic institution, but given the influence of college rankings, they must be attended to. “People do watch the rankings and make conclusions based on the rankings,” he said. “Those conclusions are not always an accurate reflection of what really matters. In a way, that doesn’t matter. You can’t just ignore them because you disagree with the methodology.” Even when rankings go a school’s way one year, the institutions must not rest on their laurels, because others are trying to unseat them. “We always hope to improve in the rankings,” A&M spokesman Jason Cook told the Tribune before today’s U.S. News release. Indeed, A&M ended up cracking the top 20 public universities in the nation for the first time. It is tied for 19th, while UT is 13th. In a statement, A&M President R. Bowen Loftin said he was “pleased to see Texas A&M advance in the rankings and break into the top 20 among the nation’s public universities, while maintaining our lofty status of balancing value and quality of education.” This article originally appeared in The Texas Tribune

ReeVe hAmilton

Mike Leach: The TT Interview On Monday, former Texas Tech University football coach will submit a brief to the Texas Supreme Court challenging the school’s assertion of immunity from his wrongful termination lawsuit. Ahead of the court action, Leach stopped at BookPeople in Austin to autograph copies of his best-seller Swing Your Sword: Leading the Charge in Football and Life. He took a few moments to talk with The Texas Tribune about his lawsuit and the ongoing hoopla over college football conference realignment. Texas Tech fired Leach in 2009 after one of his players, Adam James — son of ESPN college football analyst Craig James — accused the coach of sending the young player to a dark supply closet when he opted out of practice because of a concussion. In the most recent legislative session, state Rep. Craig Eiland, D-Galveston, submitted a resolution on Leach’s behalf that would override Texas Tech’s claims of sovereign immunity and allow him to sue the university. The resolution didn’t pass, but if the Texas Supreme Court agrees to hear his case, Leach could get his day in court.

TT: Why is it important for you to challenge Texas Tech’s claim of sovereign immunity? Leach: Well, I don’t think there’s any question it’s important. The state should be required to honor contracts it engages in. Should the public citizen be protected from the state like they are from another citizen? I mean, Abraham Lincoln [believed] that, and Abraham Lincoln lived back in the 1860s. Texas, with regard to honoring their contracts, you think would’ve evolved since the 1860s. Another interesting thing to note is 38 states, most of them beginning in 1946 or before, have gotten rid of sovereign immunity when it comes to contracts with the state. We just want our day in court. When you think of the absurdity of saying the Pledge of Allegiance and not being allowed in court. Ten other states allow you in court after you do some procedures, but you will get to court. Two states require legislative approval, Texas and Kansas. Interestingly enough, if you do business internationally, you look to see if somebody is

a member of the World Trade Organization. If they’re not, you don’t do business with them because their governments can’t be counted on to fulfill contracts. If Texas and Kansas were countries they wouldn’t be admitted to the World Trade Organization. Their policies are congruent with North Korea, Somalia, Turkestan, several other countries I can’t pronounce and Micronesia. So it seems to me that it’s about time [Texas and Kansas] get in line with everybody else, protect their citizens

I don’t know everybody’s view on due process, but I do have an opinion on what the Constitution says, what the Pledge of Allegiance implies, what sixth- and seventhgraders are taught in civics classes, and I think it is that you’re going to have the opportunity to be heard. So, if we don’t have a good case, if our claim is no good, and if we’re wrong, which we’re not, because if you read my book, which I recommend, if you buy the book, there are two chapters that are going to have memos

If Texas and Kansas were countries they wouldn’t be admitted to the World Trade Organization. Their policies are congruent with North Korea, Somalia, Turkestan, several other countries I can’t pronounce and Micronesia. and stop allowing the government to say, “it doesn’t matter if we screwed up, it doesn’t matter if we induced you into a contract just so we could steal the money later and not fulfill it,” and claim sovereign immunity.

TT: Do you think you have a chance to win if the Texas Supreme Court agrees to hear the case? Leach: Well, I’m not a lawyer, but if the Constitution means anything, I think it should be pretty well a done deal. The thing is, we’re not talking about the merits of the case; we’re talking about whether the merits of the case even get to be heard.

from [Texas Tech] with their words in sworn statements, phone records and text messages. All of this “there’s two sides of the story,” that’s going to go out the window. There’s one side and [the book contains it] in their words. This is what they said, this is what they did. But do I think the chances of winning are high? In 48 other states do I think the chances of winning are high? Let’s put it this way, in 48 other states [our case] would be a slam dunk.

TT: Do college athletic programs at Texas do enough to educate athletes as compared to elsewhere?

Leach: I think they do pretty good as far as educating athletes. We had the highest graduation rate of any public institution in the country, so I felt like we did a good job. I feel like Texas high schools, when you consider the melting pot that exists in Texas, do a fairly impressive I job. No education process is perfect, but I think that, with plenty of room to improve, they do an admirable job when you compare them to the rest of the field. TT: What do you think will happen to Texas Tech if the Big 12 falls apart? Leach: Difficult to say. I think they’re on the bubble. Now, there’s three BCS conferences that aren’t going to go anywhere: the Pac-10, the Big Ten and the SEC. And I think they’re going to pick up additional members and work their way to somewhere between 16 and 20 each. I think there will be another conference, probably on the East Coast, probably some combination of the ACC and the Big East, and then they’ll take a couple teams, too. I think it’s a close call. TT: What would the best possible outcome of a conference realignment? Leach: The best possible outcome would be for Texas Tech to be invited to the Pac-10. This article originally appeared in The Texas Tribune and video excerpts of the interview and an edited transcript are online.

Susannah Jacob UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

Dayplanner

AmAndA ChAppel

Events on or around campus

Publisher Michael Huereque

IS ThaT a WarhOL?

SKULL aNd BONeS, BaBy

The VAC is presenting a lunchtime film series featuring a collection of Warhol’s film work, including silent films. Bring your lunch, a soda and your main squeeze.

Ever wanted to be a part of an elitist secret society, just like Dubya and his daddy? Well, here’s your chance. Just turn in your electronic application to the Friar Society by October 14 and maybe you’ll be giving secret handshakes after sacrificial lamb slaughterings.

September 22, 12- 1:30PM Visual Arts Center

SeLL yOUr BOdy TO ScIeNce Need a little extra cash? Skip the sperm bank and head on over to the Loving Lab where men and women ages 18-25 are needed for a very scientific study of romance, relationships and, of course, sexuality. There’s $10 in it if you do.

July 6- October 1, 9-5 PM Seay Building (SEA)

a PerMaNeNT SOLUTION TO a TeMPOrary PrOBLeM School is stressful, and many times the demands are just too much. That’s why the Counseling and Mental Health Center is showcasing a short film about “The Truth About Suicide: Real Stories of Depression in College.” Surprisingly enough, the leading killer of college students isn’t alcohol, it’s suicide.

September 22, 9-10 PM 2600 Rio Grande

account executives Alexa Hansson John Martin art Director Jessica Caraway ad Designer Terry Kennedy

September 7- October 14, 8-5PM www.friarsociety.org

editor–in–Chief Sarah Neve

LaUGhING IN The Face OF ILLITeracy

Photographer Elijah Watson

Earn your brownie points this week by helping Indian children learn how to read. This fundraiser hosted by the Pratham UT chapter will be offering a comedy show featuring UT students while donating a portion of the proceeds to educational efforts overseas. Do it. It’s for a good cause.

Copy editor Daniel J. Frimpter Campus Writers John Jarzemsky Amanda Chappel Luke Winkie

September 23, 7-10 PM Texas Union Theatre 2.228 (UNB)

sports Writers Ryan Betori Brian Bogart

The Schedule Your guide to all things burnt orange. friDay, sePTeMber 23rD

sUnDay sePTeMber 25Th

Softball

W Soccer

Temple College, Austin, Texas, 5:00 PM

Iowa State, Austin, Texas, 1:00 PM

W Soccer

W Tennis

Baylor, Austin, Texas, 7:00 PM

Longhorn Invitational, Austin, Texas, All Day

bRiAn bogARt

W Tennis Longhorn Invitational, Austin, Texas, All Day

saTUrDay, sePTeMber 24Th W Volleyball Kansas, Austin, Texas, 4:00PM

W Tennis Longhorn Invitational, Austin, Texas, All Day

entertainment Writers William Bass Devon Tincknell Sarah Vasquez Karissa Rodriguez photo: eli watson

Circulation Jeremey Tooker intern Aaron Zech ConTaCT 6705 Debcoe Drive Austin, TX 78749 O: 512–358–4149 uweeklyaustin.com info@uweeklyaustin.com PUblisher Highbrow LLC aboUT UWeekly Austin

UWeekly Austin is an independent publication and is not affiliated with the University of Texas at Austin. One free copy per person. Additional copies may be picked up at our office for .50 each. Opinions expressed are those of the writers/authors and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the staff or publishers of UWeekly. Not liable for omissions, misprints, or typographical errors. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. © Copyright 2011 Highbrow, LLC

OPINION E

That’s what she said.

photos and interviews by brian bogart

“What are you doing this weekend?”

“I’m purging my facebook of people I am no longer friends with, freaking out about my future and not doing my laundry.”

“I’ll probably be going back home to New Braunfels for the county fair.”

Sydney Kopp

audrey Najera

Air it out

dear bathrooms on campus, i know wE’rE in a BudgEt crisis, but since when did we start stocking surplus Chinese newspaper instead of toilet paper? This stuff is painful. Here is an even better way to save some money: pine cones. Yes, it will be hellaciously painful on your special places, but so is the food at Jester. However, think of all the money we could save. We could add a helipad to the stadium by nixing toilet paper from the budget. Or, we could fund research on how to legally clone Case McCoy. Also, why do I have to wait two hours for a stall on the bottom floor of the PCL? Here is a great way to create jobs on campus. Place a hostess in front of the bathroom door to hand out those buzzing and strobing disks to students to alert them when it is there turn. Too strapped for cash? Why don’t we just throw some port-apotties up in the lobby? Better yet, we could

team up with the Visual Arts Center and turn it into a new media project: Postmodern Porto.

Sincerely,

I really have to go.

an Air It Out FaQ “I’ll be kickin it with my Texas Lonestars Friday, recovering Saturday, and seeing Cherry Orchard Sunday.”

Lexi Summers

“I’m going to Houston for a Benefit BBQ and possibly going to an event to Casa Marinella, a shelter for homeless immigrants and political refugees..”

Julissa rodriguez

How to get us to actually print what you write. 1. everything anonymous – Not only are we giving you an opportunity to publicly air your grievances, we’re allowing you to hide behind the cowardly mask of anonymity to do it. So we don’t want your name. But we’re also extending that same courtesy to whomever you’re complaining about. If a wasted girl spilled food on you at Kerbey Lane, then call her “a girl.” We don’t need her name, date of birth, or UTEID. 2. be brief – Sorry would–be Unabombers, we’re not going to publish your entire manifesto. Short and not–so–sweet is key. If you can’t say what you need in less than 250 words, than you’re rambling, not ranting. 3. stay specific – There’s a lot to be annoyed about on campus. We know. But please pick one issue, not seven, and avoid digressing. An open letter to whoever keeps shaving their pubes in the communal sink is good; a list of things you don’t like about living in the dorms is less so.

4. Powerful language – At UWeekly, we write our own rules. We’re down to say a naughty word now and again. But there is a huge difference between the rare, well–placed profanity and a barely literate Youtube comment. Your critiques should be at least a little bit more cutting than “blah blah blah is a *@#&!!!” 5. To Whom it May Concern – Air It Out is publishing your open letters, so don’t forget to address them as such. Did some douche lose his lunch the last time you rode the E–Bus? Then open with “Dear Dude Who Barfed on the Bus.” And just because we’re not giving out your name doesn’t mean you can’t let him know who it’s from. Just sign it, “Sincerely, Everyone Else on the Bus.” Please send all Air It Out submissions to airitout@ uweekly.com UWeekly reserves the right to edit submissions for content, anonymity, and space. UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

Photo: Ryan Betori

Swords! Sweat! Sophistication! UT fencing club provides rare opportunity and visceral thrill When I was younger, I wanted to be a knight. I didn’t have a particular inclination towards gore, but oddly, I wanted nothing more than to stick a cool-looking sword through the hearts of all bad guys. It wasn’t just the violence I was drawn to; it was the sophistication, the romanticism of it. But I never got a chance. That is, not until last Wednesday, when I practiced with the UT fencing club. “It’s physical chess,” said UT fencing president Wes Stafford about fencing. “It’s the most intellectually physical sport.” He’s right. After picking out our fencing gear, other beginners and myself were ushered into drills. I quickly learned that anything involving swords was much less Conan the Barbarian than it was Bobby Fisher. We were inundated with enough terminology to make my Nutrition class seem flimsy by comparison. I learned that are three different swords: the foil, the epee, and the sabre. A parry is a defensive move to block an opponent that should only require the movement of your fingers. Then there’s the advance (single and double), the retreat (single and double), the check-step (forwards and backwards), recovering, the disengage, and the jump-lunge. All of these involve a degree of footwork and foresight that is highly precise, and, at first, unnatural. Having played sports for most of my life, I consider myself fairly athletic. But the footwork demanded from fencing is completely antithetical to the footwork in any other sport. It’s akin to a methodical dance. I felt (and personally looked) like a total dumbass. Who knew knighthood involved more than bravery, goodness, and a handsome face? “Footwork is the biggest thing beginners struggle with,” said Stafford. “It’s also what most of fencing is about.”

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

The technique involved was difficult, but over the course of the hour, with the help of patient and direct coaching, I found myself catching on. It was a lot to take in, but it was also a commensurate thrill to begin to grasp something that was once completely foreign to me. That’s the best part of the UT fencing club: It makes what is otherwise an unfamiliar and somewhat esoteric sport into something that’s completely accessible to anyone at UT. Even better, the club doesn’t merely accommodate new members; it hungers for them. The 15 or so beginners and I were all given individual attention and utmost respect. Although we looked like bumbling buffoons, we were treated as anything but. “You can come in here without any gear or experience,” said club treasurer Dan Shamlian. “You don’t need anything to start fencing.” In a sport that is costly—approximately $1,000 for gear and another roughly $60 for a private lesson—the UT fencing club offers a unique opportunity. A beginner gets to

experienced. It’s a neat opportunity to really see what it is.” It was Love’s second time to come to the club. He doesn’t plan on stopping and it’s easy

“It’s physical chess,” said UT fencing president Wes Stafford about fencing. “It’s the most intellectually physical sport.” come out for five lessons before deciding to join the club, three of which involve basics, two of which can involve actual fencing. Fees due total $135 if one joins, which isn’t bad considering the club provides gear, optional practice (including professional instruction) about four times a week, and a chance to meet some 20 to 25 new friends. “James Bond,” said fellow beginner Robert Love on what prompted him to look into the fencing club. “It’s a sport you’ve seen but never

to understand why. After my first hour of fencing practice I still had much to learn and could hardly be described as competent. And yet, despite my inexperience, I was already able to discern the attraction of fencing. For one, it truly is a beautiful sport. As I’ve already mentioned, it looks like an intricate, mechanical dance. The stance and precision asked of a fencer almost mimics that of a ballerina. All the moves, when done correctly, are graceful and swift. There is

no time for superfluity; any extra movement is a burden, not a boon. Only adding to the sport’s beauty and complexity is the delicate balance of intuition and strategy, of the mental and the physical. But what’s coolest of all is that the sport still retains the quality that drew me to knights as a little kid. In a few drills, we got to use boom sticks (think solid foam) against another person. When matched up against your opponent, there is a very visceral rush of may-the-best-man win. In spite of all fencing’s grace, there is still something gloriously carnal about attacking someone with a sword. To put it bluntly: it’s a hell of a high, and one that’s hard to come by in an age when thrusting someone with a sharp blade is not seen as a socially acceptable practice. Perhaps Stafford, who puts it simply, puts it best: “It’s a thrill whenever you actually stab somebody.” To learn more visit: website.utfencing.org

Ryan Betori

The Highlight Reel It looks like Ohio State University outran its luck a bit following their NCAA probe and subsequent punishments. For a couple games at least, they looked better than expected and even made people in Columbus forget about one of the worst off-seasons in school history. None of that helped, though, when they were hit by a Hurricane that lasted approximately four quarters as they lost to an unranked Miami team 24-6. The loss was particularly significant for the Buckeyes because it bumped OSU out of the top 25 for the first time since 2004. Yep, the Jim Tressell era is definitely over at Ohio State University, and that couldn’t be any more clear. If you think the Texas running game is already proving to be a force in 2011, just wait until 2012. While Texas has already shown plenty of moxie in running the ball (currently ranked 21st in rushing offense) with the likes of Malcolm Brown, Fozzy Whittaker, and Cody Johnson, class of 2012 commit Jonathan Gray looks to make an immediate impact when he steps foot on the 40 Acres. He has already broken

the Texas state high school record for most career touchdowns with 148 and will undoubtedly leave that record far behind when his season is finally over. With Malcolm Brown and Jonathan Gray lining up as Texas’s go-to backs, it will be the perfect “Thunder and Lightning” combination we’ve been looking for for years.

“It’s not often that a pitcher becomes so dominant that he actually affects the personality of a team, but that’s exactly what Justin Verlander has done with the detroit Tigers.” Attention folks, but Justin Verlander is having one of the best seasons a pitcher has had in recent memory. Besides becoming the first pitcher in nine years to win 24 games, he’s also won his 12th straight start, and as of this writing he has a 17-inning scoreless streak running. Oh yeah, and he’s only the seventh pitcher since World War II to win 24 games with 240 strikeouts. It’s not often that a pitcher becomes

so dominant that he actually affects the personality of a team, but that’s exactly what Justin Verlander has done with the Detroit Tigers as they continue to try and cling on to that number one seed in the playoffs. Is it just me, or is Texas just becoming a sexier team week after week? Who even knows how the Longhorns are going to look by the time bowl season rolls around, but personally, I’m very excited to see what happens. Say what you will about Tony Romo, but the guy is a competitor. One week after playing a headscratchingly bad fourth quarter that led to his team’s collapse against the Jets, he fractures a rib against the 49ers just to come back in the middle of the game and lead his team from behind to victory. Romosexuals everywhere, rejoice!

bRiAn bogARt photo: Justin Verlander, credit: leadfoot

Photo:Chris J. Nelson, Bobby Jones,, Jeffrey Beall

Weekday Warrior Which fantasy players to play, trade, and bench Every season, all the buzz hovers around the fantasy football draft. And why not? It’s flashy and fun to select the league’s best players and to create your own team. But draft gurus don’t translate into fantasy football champions. The guys with their names at the top of the league standings are those that adjust their lineup week in and week out, making crucial changes based on what’s happening in the NFL. It’s a lot of work, but it pays off. Here’s a guide to make that payoff a little easier.

Pickup/Play Daniel Thomas (RB Miami Dolphins): Thomas, a rookie drafted in the late second round out of Kansas State, is about as much of a household name as I am. And for fantasy owners, that’s gold. Last Sunday, Thomas had 107 yards off a mere 18 carries. In the process, he established himself as the Dolphins go-to back over Reggie Bush. The Dolphins’ preseason plan was for Bush to get roughly 70% of carries while Thomas got 30%. There’s a strong chance that those numbers are flipping.

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

Willis McGahee (RB Denver Broncos): While the Broncos starting back, Knowshon Moreno, was out with a hamstring injury, McGahee exploded for 101 yards and a TD. There has been little information regarding the seriousness of Knowshon’s injury, but as of now, it doesn’t look like he’ll be suiting up against the Titans this week. And even if he is, McGahee has earned his keep and should be getting more touches.

much publicity playing for the pitiful Raiders and that bodes well for fantasy owners. After Sunday’s breakout performance, he’s also going to be the man the Raiders look for over the next few weeks.

Bench/Trade Arian Foster (RB Houston Texans): Foster came out of nowhere last season to become a fantasy darling. As a result, big things

Big things have been expected of Foster this season. And what has he given us? A big, messed up hamstring. Denarious Moore (WR Oakland Raiders): Among NFL preseason nerds, it’s a well-known fact that Moore had one of the best camps of any rookie. Last Sunday, in the Raiders’ 21-14 loss to the Buffalo Bills, Moore demonstrated to the world what many NFL junkies already knew: he’s a beast. Moore went for 5 catches, 146 yards, and a TD. Moore isn’t likely to get

have been expected of Foster this season. And what has he given us? A big, messed up hamstring. Foster’s injured hamstring has been an issue since preseason. After sitting for the season opener, last week Foster looked like his 09-10 self until he tweaked the same hamstring and removed himself from the game. In Foster’s absence Ben Tate

has established himself as a legitimate threat and will likely eat into Foster’s carries when Foster’s back and healthy. Foster’s value is at an all time low so don’t trade him, but don’t look to play him this week. Cam Newton (QB Carolina Panthers): Don’t get me wrong, I love what Cam’s been able to do this season and he’s certainly proven the haters wrong thus far. However, he’s going to have a much harder time doing this in the upcoming weeks. After he plays the Jags Sunday, he’s got a brutal sequence of games that includes Chicago, New Orleans, Atlanta, and Washington. Newton’s stock can’t get any higher than it is now. I do believe Cam will have a great rookie season, but as defenses begin to study him they’ll soon learn how to exploit his inexperience. And as we know, Cam is prone to mistakes (3 picks against Green Bay). He’s also not terribly efficient. Trade him for a top veteran who’ll be a surefire contributor. Now is the time. Colts Receivers: This may seem like a no brainer, but people I’ve talked to insist that the Colts are more than just Peyton Manning. After two games, the evidence is in. These people are sorely mistaken. Not only did the Colts lose Manning, but they also are playing a very old Kerry Collins. Collins has had only a few weeks to learn the offense. It will take at least twice that time before Colts receiver reach anywhere near the productivity they’d be looking at had Manning gone unscathed.

Ryan Betori

Texas will make decision within two weeks Texas will make a decision about its future conference home within two weeks, a source close to the situation said Monday. Texas regents on Monday voted to give UT president Bill Powers the authority to make decisions on behalf of the university when it comes to conference affiliation. The Longhorns’ first option remains holding the Big 12 together with Oklahoma and Oklahoma State in it, the source said. The Big 12’s TV partners (ABC/ESPN and

“Why would Texas commit to the Pac-12 any sooner than they absolutely have to, if UT really wants the Big 12 to survive,” the administrator said. “The Pac-12 isn’t going to take OU and Oklahoma State and then get

said, because UT can stay with its rivals Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Tech. Pac-12 commissioner Larry Scott also appears to have a proposal that would allow Texas to hold onto the revenue from the Longhorn

with the other six regional networks in the Pac-12, sources said. The name would likely also be changed to include reference to the Pac-16. The Longhorns are busy doing their homework on going west, sources said. And

A Big 12 administrator said if Texas really wants the Big 12 to survive, the Longhorns should wait things out and see if OU and OSU get bids on their own to the Pac-12. If they don’t, Texas could try to convince the Sooners and Cowboys to give the Big 12 one more chance, the administrator said. Fox) are not interested in continuing their current contracts with the Big 12 if Oklahoma, Oklahoma State and Texas are not all in the league, sources said. After being given the authority by regents to make conference affiliation decisions on behalf of Oklahoma, school president David Boren on Monday expressed concern about the instability of the Big 12. Boren also said OU has engaged in talks with the Pac-12 that have been “constructive.” Sources close to the situation say Oklahoma and Oklahoma State are totally focused on becoming members of the Pac-12. But there is some question about if those schools would receive a bid without Texas. A Big 12 administrator said if Texas really wants the Big 12 to survive, the Longhorns should wait things out and see if OU and OSU get bids on their own to the Pac-12. If they don’t, Texas could try to convince the Sooners and Cowboys to give the Big 12 one more chance, the administrator said.

nervous and grab two other schools. “The Pac-12 would hold open a spot for Texas.” Mack Brown made a passionate plea for the Big 12 to stay together during a conference call with reporters Monday. A second source confirmed to Orangebloods. com that the Atlantic Coast Conference remains interested in Texas - but without Texas Tech. The source said the ACC would consider a TexasKansas or Texas-Missouri combination. But the ACC has real concerns about Texas Tech’s academic standing. (Tech was ranked No. 160 in the latest U.S. News and World report rankings of America’s top colleges and universities.) It’s doubtful Texas would try to find a conference home without Texas Tech, although a source close to Tech has said the Red Raiders have received some attention from the SEC as a possible partner with Texas A&M. But the leading option for Texas continues to be the Pac-12, which would include Texas Tech, multiple sources said. Texas is warming to the Pac-12, sources

Network as long as schools in what would be the Pac-16 meet a certain threshold of revenue from their third-tier rights. But it’s likely ESPN would give up control of the Longhorn Network in some sort of buyout by the Pac-12, so that programming would be overseen by the conference - to be consistent

9.95 monthly

if Texas and Pac-12 presidents like what they hear, the Longhorns could be members of the Pac-12 within two weeks, sources said. Stay tuned.

Chip Brown Orangebloods.com Columnist

99.95 annually UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

The Real McCoy What Texas has done so far in three games to help people forget about 5-7. When the Horns first took the field at the Rose Bowl against the same UCLA team that had dismantled them in Austin only one year prior, no one really knew what to expect. Not Case McCoy, not Mack Brown, and certainly not the UCLA Bruins who ended up walking out of their home stadium with their tails between their legs by the time the final whistle had been blown. At the end of the day, Texas had exacted its revenge and even found its identity as a football team in four quarters time, and to top it off, Case McCoy emerged into the starting quarterback everyone on the 40 Acres hoped he could be. Not like we should be surprised. After all, “McCoy” is a very popular moniker here in Austin that’s heavily associated with winning football games and winning big. Which is why it was more than nostalgic for Texas fans to see someone named McCoy lead the Longhorns to victory to the tune of 49-20. A familiar sight, no doubt, and a score that would indicate that the new era dawning at Texas has already gone as well as anybody

After all, “McCoy” is a very popular moniker here in Austin that’s heavily associated with winning football games and winning big. could have hoped. Bryan Harsin has made his print on this offense with his effective combination of power football and trickery. Manny Diaz has already left his mark with complex blitz packages that have been giving opposing offense’s nightmares. Stacy Searles has added a new dimension to our

offensive line that we are just now beginning to see. Even Bennie Wylie has shown off all the work he’s put in with the fourth quarter dominance the Longhorns have displayed three games in a row. Now heading into their bye week, the Horns have one thing on their mind: Iowa State. After what UCLA did to derail the Longhorn’s 2010 campaign last year, it was the Iowa State loss that effectively stamped out any remaining embers that were burning in last year’s team. After this week’s win against UCLA, though, the expectations have now been completely reset. While the BYU win proved we were an improved team, UCLA proved that we were a totally different team. Now that the Horns enter their seasondefining stretch of their season, confidence

is at an all-time high and it couldn’t come at a better time. After Iowa State come back to back tests against Oklahoma and Oklahoma State, two games that can certainly set a tone for the rest of the season since both are top 10 tests, with Oklahoma currently being the consensus number one team in the land. At this point, though, that doesn’t seem to phase the Horns, who right now just seem plenty happy playing ball because they’re doing it so well. It’s that kind of prevailing attitude that carries teams through the long grind of the football season and the longer that attitude sticks around on the 40 Acres, the more fun we’ll have watching these Longhorns. These days, Bevo is hungry and next on the menu is Cy the Cardinal. Hook ‘em.

Brian Bogart

This Week in

Face Punchin’ photo: uFC

Ellenberger punches way into contention JakE EllEnBErgEr forcEd his way into UFC welterweight title contention at UFC Fight Night 25 on Saturday, as he knocked out recent title challenger Jake Shields in the night’s headline bout. The welterweight won his fifth consecutive bout inside the UFC and ninth out of his last ten overall, and he is now added to a crowded mix at 170 pounds in the title picture. It took him just 53 seconds to put away Shields, whereas UFC welterweight champion Georges St-Pierre couldn’t finish Shields in their five round battle in April. “The Ultimate Fighter 11” winner Court McGee moved to 3-0 inside the UFC in his first fight in almost a year, as he earned a unanimous decision over Dongi Yang in the co-feature. McGee earned the victory with steady striking and by having the ability to stay on his feet in the fight. Featherweight Erik Koch also put himself into title contention with a unanimous decision over “The Ultimate Fighter 12” winner Jonathan Brookins. The win was the fourth in a row for Koch, and he earned the decision despite Brrokins’ constant pressure and cage control. Koch controlled the striking and landed more shots to win the fight. The win is the fourth in a row for Koch, who has steadily climbed the 145-pound rankings since being in the WEC and could be ready for a No. 1 contender fight in the near future. The night’s final main card bout featured the return of middleweight Alan Belcher after more than a year out of action due to an eye injury, and he didn’t take much time in finishing off veteran Jason MacDonald with a submission due to strikes in the first round of their bout. End of night bonuses of $55,000 went to Ellenberger (knockout of the night), T.J. Waldburger (submission of the night for his triangle choke over Mike Stumpf), and Lance Benoist and Matt Riddle (fight of the night). The UFC’s next event will be this weekend as Quinton “Rampage” Jackson challenges Jon

Jones for the light heavyweight title at UFC 135. Bellator returned on Saturday night with its middleweight quarterfinals at Bellator 50, and the 185-pounders provided some exciting finishes to set up a highly anticipated semifinal round next month. In the night’s first bout, former jiu-jitsu world champion Vitor

matchup of two Ohio middleweights, Brian Rogers extended his first round knockout streak to seven straight bouts, as he finished off Victor O’Donnell with strikes in the first round of their co-headliner. In the night’s main event, former tournament finalist Bryan Baker returned to earn a late TKO over another tournament finalist in Jared Hess.

The win is the fourth in a row for Koch, who has steadily climbed the 145-pound rankings since being in the Wec and could be ready for a No. 1 contender fight in the near future. Vianna actually primarily used his striking to earn a split decision victory over the very tough Sam Alvey. Former Bellator tournament champion Alexander Shlemenko returned to the tournament and the pure striker immediately submitted fellow European striker Zelg Galesic with a standing guillotine choke in the first round of their bout. In a

The middleweight semifinals are now set for next month at Bellator 54 in Atlantic City on Oct. 8, as Brian Rogers will take on Alexander Shlemenko and Bryan Baker faces Vitor Vianna. The event will be headlined by a lightweight title bout as champion Eddie Alvarez defends against season four lightweight tournament winner Michael Chandler. Bellator returns this

weekend with Bellator 51 in Canton, Ohio. The event will feature the quarterfinals of the bantamweight tournament, and a tournament bout between current featherweight champion Joe Warren and former Olympic bronze medalist wrestler Alexis Vila. QUIcK hITS: MMA pioneer Jorge Patino earned a split decision victory over Pete Spratt in the headliner of HDNet-televised Legacy FC 8 on Friday night, claiming the organization’s welterweight title…Fedor Emelianenko is officially set for a return to the sport, as he’ll take on former UFC No. 1 contender Jeff Monson in a M-1 Challenge event in his native Russia on Nov. 20…Former WWE champion and Strikeforce fighter Bobby Lashley has signed an exclusive deal to compete for the Texas-based Shark Fights organization…This week is set to be one of the busiest in MMA history. “The Ultimate Fighter 14” will debut tonight on Spike TV, Titan FC 20 is Friday on HDNet, Strikeforce Challengers 19 is Friday on Showtime, DREAM.17 is early Saturday morning on HDNet, Bellator 51 is Saturday on MTV 2 and Spike.com, and UFC 135 is Saturday on Facebook, Spike TV, and Pay-per-view.

dAVid mCKinney UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

The tenth annual Austin City Limits Music Festival has come and gone. Let’s hope you’ve nursed those hangovers and sunburns and caught up on sleep by now. Here are the highlights in case you missed anything.

FINE & FORM FITTING ITALIAN CLOTHING 2815c Guadalupe St. Austin Open 7 days a week

Photo: K. Adam Stockstill

Austin City Limits

Photo: K. Adam Stockstill

Rain, rain, don’t go away. Of course, rain finally made a much-needed appearance, but that didn’t make the crowd miss a beat. There was a huge cheer when Young the Giant announced during their Saturday afternoon set that it was raining in Austin. Some people brought out the umbrellas and ponchos, but the majority of the crowd just soaked in all the rain.

Tyler Bryant & the Shakedown This 20-year-old set the bar high for Saturday performances early on. Those that have seen the documentary Rock Prophecies about rock photographer Robert M. Knight got a brief introduction to the young guitar prodigy. He showed off his mad guitar skills whenever he had the chance, but never crossed the eyerolling, ok-we-get-it territory, which is how it should be done. I’m looking at you Mars Volta.

Fresh Millions Representing the homegrown talent, these three guys brought the funk. Funk usually gets a bad name because there’s a fine line that divides the good and the straight-up cheese. This band was named “Best New Band” at this year’s Austin Music Awards, so obviously they are doing something right.

Helping those in need According to Fresh and Clean Media, ACL attendees and the Do Good Bus raised $15,426 for the Red Cross and the Texas Wildfire Relief Fund on Friday. However, ACL producers C3 Presents are matching those funds bringing the

Mariachi El Bronx total to $30,852 that will assist those affected by the central Texas wildfires. Good job team.

Fitz and the Tantrums This band woke up at 5 a.m. in Colorado so they could perform 12 hours later in Austin, and they showed no signs of exhaustion. Definitely one of the highlights of the weekend as they made everyone move their money-makers to their Motown-inspired grooves including their own renditions of “Steady As She Goes” and “Sweet Dreams.”

Cee Lo Oh Cee Lo. Watching the all-female band walk on stage in their curve-hugging space outfits, I just threw my hands in the air and just thought “of course.” This judge for The Voice certainly put on a more PG-13 show than the rest of the festival, proclaiming that he’s 323 lbs. of raw sexuality and proving that it’s possible to make Pussycat Dolls’ “Don’t Cha” (which he wrote and produced) raunchier. Of course, Austin’s own Nakia, who was on Team Cee Lo on The Voice, joined him on stage to perform the song that brought attention to both of them, “F*ck You,” which became one giant sing-along with the entire crowd.

WAX This guy attracted people from the other stages with his hip-hop skills discussing topics that a lot of people can relate to: being broke and regretting those purchases that probably would have prevented you from being broke in the first place, as well as the website everyone has a love/hate relationship with, Facebook.

You have to give props to the band that will still wear their black mariachi garb during their 12:30 p.m. set in the Texas heat. Every time I’ve seen this band, it seems the songs just get better, mixing their hardcore foundation with the traditional Mexican styling. This was already proclaimed on Twitter, but if I ever get married, I want this band to perform at my wedding.

The Head and the Heart Singer/guitarist/percussionist Josiah Johnson informed everyone at the beginning of The Head and the Heart’s set that “whatever you give us, we’ll give you back,” and that about did it. Each member danced all over the stage with smiles on their faces as the crowd clapped and sang along. This band has been compared to Fleet Foxes in the press, probably because they’re label-mates and incorporate amazing vocal harmonies in their folksy songs, but that’s where the similarities end.

Stevie Wonder What can be said about Stevie Wonder? It’s freaking Stevie Wonder. Sadly the complaint of the night was that no one could hear him unless you were super close, but again, it’s Stevie Wonder. How many chances will you get to see Stevie Wonder perform live? For those that couldn’t attend the festival, don’t frown. You can check out some selected performances on YouTube at youtube.com/ aclfestival.

Sarah Vasquez

The 3rd Annual South Austin Custom and Vintage Bicycle Show

NFL SUNDAY HEADQUARTERS COMPLIMENTARY BUFFET FROM 11AM-12:30PM

$3 16 oz TAL

L BOYS

$5 RITAS ON THE ROCKS

$3.75 PREMIU

M DRAFT

$2.75 DOMESTIC DRAFT 422 congress ave sw corner 5th and congress www.ShinersSaloon.com

photo: eli watson

aftEr sPEnding a wEEkEnd watching live music performed by nationally touring bands at ACL, it doesn’t get more local than Tex-Mex and a custom bike show in the 04. The 3rd Annual South Austin Custom and Vintage Bicycle Show is Sunday, Sept. 25, from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. at El Mercado on South First. The show’s organizers are expecting a record turnout from Austin’s cruiser and low rider enthusiasts. This year’s show will include live music, competitions for best boys’ bike, girls’ bike and wildcard bike, drinks from El Mercado and a raffle with $2000 worth of prizes from Fast Folks, East Side Pedal Pushers, Clown Dog Bikes and many others. Chris Hunt dreamt up the idea of the show three years ago after seeing his friends in San Antonio organize a similar event. “I really just wanted to get a buzz going in Austin about the bikes I like to build,” said Hunt. Hunt did not grow up riding bikes. He was always more into skateboards as a kid. Later, when he needed to get anywhere in Austin, he drove his car. It was not until 2004 that things changed. Hunt was charged with a DWI that left him devastated and without a driver’s license. “The next step was a bicycle and a bus, so that’s really what got me into it,” said Hunt. “Once

and pedicabs on the weekends. “It’s all I do,” said Alsman. “It’s my entertainment, my occupation, my transportation.” This will be the first time the event does not coincide with Austin City Limits, so Alsman said he is expecting even greater turnout than previous years. “I’m trying to make it not just a parking lot

“We’re hoping we’re going to make a really substantial donation,” said Kinney. “We’re really trying to make an impact and make a difference.” I got back on my feet and got things squared away, I could build bikes that I liked and looked cool. More fashion over function.” What began as a necessity quickly became an obsession for Hunt, who now looks back at the DWI and all of the baggage that came with it as a blessing in disguise. For three years he took his bicycle with him everywhere, almost completely cutting cars out of the equation. “I was usually frustrated when I was in the car,” he said. In 2009, he decided to begin showing off his new passion by setting up a casual bike expo in a parking lot. Two years later, the show is gearing up for its biggest year yet. Hunt is the first to admit that he still does not really know what he is doing. The live music, raffle and sponsors are all new additions to the festival, and to help organize and manage the growth of the event, Hunt has brought Jimi Alsman on board. Alsman has been involved with the biking community since he was 24 and bought his first BMX bike from a pawn shop for $30. Now he rides with Social Cycling

filled with bikes you can look at, but an actual benefit,” said Alsman. The money generated from the raffle will go to BikeTexas and the League of Bicycling Voters, two bicycle education and advocacy groups that Alsman said are responsible for “anything good that happens in legislation” concerning bikes. Nate Kinney, director of special events coordination for El Mercado, is helping to organize the show. “We’re hoping we’re going to make a really substantial donation,” said Kinney. “We’re really trying to make an impact and make a difference.” Hunt said the show is focused on cruisers and low riders, but is open to cyclists of all types. “If anyone has a bike that they’ve worked on and they’re proud of, bring it,” said Hunt. “The more the merrier.” The 3rd annual south austin Custom and vintage bicycle show will take place on sunday from 11 a.m. to 6 p.m. at el Mercado, 1302 s 1st st. The event is free.

bRett thoRne

Live music by Charlie Hurtin and the Hecklers, great food and drinks all day, tons of great sponsors and vendors, GREAT prize raffles ALL DAY with ONE GRAND PRIZE WINNER! We will have hundreds of awesome custom whips and a custom/vintage bike contest! A portion of the proceeds will be donated to a local Austin charity helping the Austin community so keep Austin biking and come party with us! THE EVENT IS FREE! There will be over $2,000 worth of raffle prizes from: • The Onion Pizza • Big Fat Meanie Head • Fast Folks Cyclery • Eastside Pedal Pushers • Longhorn Bikes • Clow Dog Bikes • Waterloo Cycles • Ozone Bikes • University Cyclery • Freewheeling Bicycles • League of Bicycling Voters • Bike Texas Buy a $10 raffle ticket to enter to win a custom bike from event founder Chris Hunt. Need more motivation than that? One hundred percent of the proceeds of the $10 tickets goes to charity

The battle of the wing bars After the great success of our first throwdown between Magnolia and Kerbey, we’ve taken Versus to a new, more deeply-fried location. Yes I’m talking about two epicenters of broness, Plucker’s and WingZone. As usual, these are all actual quotes taken from actual conversations that happened within these stores, people tend to get pretty passionate about wings.

So your friend just told me you’re obsessed with Plucker’s. I mean, it’s good, I don’t know if I’d go that far.

How important is Plucker’s in your life? Not as important as like, education.

Do you feel like a bad person when you come here? Not really, I just feel really full. Except when I get my check and I realize how much money I spent on getting uncomfortably full.

How close are you to being a vegetarian? I was a vegetarian for a while actually.

“Conceptually, sexually, symbolically, mentally, every way possible way Plucker’s could mean something to you, it’s in my heart.” And then what happened? And then I came to Plucker’s. Carly Neal, Psychology

You said your friend Carly is obsessed with Plucker’s and she’s denying that, do you have any further comments? She is obsessed with Plucker’s! She has a membership card.

And why are you here? Because she wanted to come.

Would you rather be at WingZone? I’d rather just not eat wings. Lacey Carver, Communications Is this a post-ACL Plucker’s? Yep!

Is Plucker’s the best place to go after ACL? Absolutely.

How important is Plucker’s to you in your life? It is my life! There’s no difference between this restaurant and my life.

Like, is it symbolically your life or literally your life?

I think he just summed it up with sex and Plucker’s, you can’t chose sex over Plucker’s, Plucker’s wins every time, every time! Even if it’s with a porn star it doesn’t matter. Sex is on like level 2, while Plucker’s is at like, 6 or 7.

What if you could have sex with Plucker’s? I think my head would explode. – Benjamin Alexander Myers, still in High School

Is there anything spiritual about eating at Plucker’s? No, Plucker’s is a physical experience, you’re eating food.

Would you rather be here or WingZone?

Conceptually, sexually, symbolically, mentally, every way possible way Plucker’s could mean something to you, it’s in my heart.

What? No! WingZone sucks, I don’t even want to talk about WingZone I want to talk about Plucker’s.

So you’re very serious about Plucker’s.

Talk some shit about WingZone right now.

Oh beyond belief, if it was sex and Plucker’s I’d go with Plucker’s.

Okay. Like, the chicken at Plucker’s is just so much better, they have many more flavors, everybody knows it. Everybody knows! Whether they deny it or not, WingZone is superior to Plucker’s. Like, 95% of all people would pick Plucker’s. The only reason they might eat at WingZone is a fiscal reason.

What if it was sex at Plucker’s? If it was sex at Plucker’s… oh man I don’t even think I can conceptualize how amazing that would be.

How close to Nirvana is sex at Plucker’s? That’s literally beyond my wildest imagination.

Do you think you could handle it? No way. Matthew Tyler Myers, Event Management

Do you think you can go beyond what Matthew just laid down? You know, Matthew is my brother, and

Are you saying that only upper middle class people eat at Plucker’s? I don’t want to go into demographics about it, but Plucker’s is affordable. It’s a joke if you can’t afford Plucker’s. I don’t understand the motivation behind WingZone, just think about the name, WingZone, that’s gross. We all make hierarchies about everything, and, Plucker’s… It’s like wearing Polo versus Nautica.

Are you a philosophy major by any chance? No I’m just a critical thinker. - Scott Ashfall, Design

Why is WingZone better than Plucker’s? Well, we’ve won best original flavor at a New York competition 3 years in a row, we’re BYOB, we’re working on getting our alcohol license.

Come on man, take the tie off, talk some shit about Plucker’s right now. I can’t! Plucker’s is good! I used to eat there before I started working here.

Do you guys ever scrap? Do you ever meet up with the Plucker’s employees with a few baseball bats? Oh yeah, we throw down. We have little UFC brawls. We always win of course.

Where is WingZone headed? To the top! To Mars? Yes we will have the first astronaut eat WingZone in space. – Anonymous WingZone Employee

So why are you here at WingZone instead of Plucker’s? They have the world’s best fries, I’m not even gonna lie about that. Way better than Plucker’s.

Does WingZone make you feel spiritually enriched? I mean, I get a food boner if that’s what you’re asking. – Brittney Eckerd, Drama

Luke Winkie UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

Typecast: A guide to local bands in Austin The local music scene in Austin is ripe, it just needs you to come and pick it. On any given night you’ll find at least some of the bands below sweating, swearing, and soloing in clubs and coffee shops. To help you figure out what exactly your “thing” is, our scientists with their TYPECAST-3000 have successfully determined what you are into and what you dislike so that you may paint yourself into or out of a box.

Over-Serious Post-Rocker Wears: Expensive cardigan, frown. Can be spotted: Waterloo Records, grading your homework at the RLM building, at shows with arms crossed. If you can be spotted front row at every Explosions in the Sky show and wear a Mogwai T-shirt, this is you. We know you hate lyrics and, like Sting, you prefer your climaxes to be long and drawn out. My Education have been doing this sort of thing since you were in short pants (aka spants). Comprised of the regular rock setup along with a cello and xylophone, My Education give you that cinematic musical feeling without having to spend $30 at ACL Live. Likewise, Balmorhea deliver on that same theme, but on a much more hushed and poignant note, infusing rock sensibilities with classical overtones. On top of this crescendo is Mother Falcon. Comprised of every instrument ever invented, Mother Falcon violate the postrock taboo of having lyrics, but make up for their mistake with a philharmonic sound.

Too stoned to care Wears: Black t-shirt, body odor, grandma’s jewelry. Can be spotted: Perusing at Oat Willie’s, serving you food at Spider House.

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

You might not live in your parents’ basement, but your dorm or apartment is rife with black lights and might smell like Cheech Marin’s jean jacket. You are obviously familiar with the trippy awesomeness of The Black Angels. If not, the power of their psychedelic sitars will no doubt

induce a purple haze in your little brain, or perhaps even a flashback to ’Nam. If you prefer a little choogle in your Kool-Aid, then Smoke and Feathers are your jam. These long-haired children travel very close to The Allman Brothers Band sound while tinging it with some groovier vibrations. Enough screwing around. For those who like to choogle the hardest, Tia Carrera* is your thing. An unstoppable power trio, all of the members of Tia Carrera were conceived at the same time after Jimi Hendrix soloed too close to a woman one night at a show.

Dance Punk Wears: Tom’s, unflattering jorts, bad haircut Can be seen: Grinding their crotch against you at Barbarella, inside the bathroom at Beauty Bar, wearing Ray-Bans. Still crying into your jorts that LCD Soundsystem broke up? Look no further than The Black and White Years for your dance punk fix, cowbell not sold separately. Still got a fever? The only prescription is probably Bodytronix. If these guys don’t get you moving, better head to the student services building. And if you’ve ever felt an affinity for Disco Stu, then check out the DJ crew Flying Turns. These dudes deliver the contemporary disco like Studio 54 was still open.

Metalhead Wears: Black jeans, bad attitude, homemade tattoos. Can be spotted: Passed out in alley of Red 7, breaking your mailbox with baseball bat. Whether you’re into the sludge or the thrash, Mammoth Grinder will probably satiate whatever perverse metal desire that you might have. The band effortlessly moves from both poles of the metal spectrum, in a very delightfully evil way. And then, silently swooping down into a river to snatch you up by your ear drums comes Eagle Claw. A little more accessible than the Grinder, Eagle Claw do instrumental metal at its finest, reminding us why we love to bang our heads, always leaving you with whiplash.

Country Boy Wears: Pearl snap’s and Stetsons Can be spotted: Broken Spoke, frat houses, Western Warehouse. The country scene in Austin is not that hard to find. You just have to go south of the river to the Broken Spoke or Continental Club to crack a pool cue over someone’s back or smash a beer bottle because someone talked to your lady. Dale Watson is the bread and butter of the scene. Watson plays the sort of old-school honky-tonk you might hear at a roadhouse with chicken wire in front of the stage. Bringing up the rear of the scene is Junior Brown. Pretty much a resident at the Continental Club, Brown wields a hybrid lap steel and six-string guitar. He even scored a CMA award with his hit “My Wife Thinks You’re Dead.” Also, check out Leo Rondeau with his Monday night shit-kicking residency at the Hole in the Wall.

Vanilla indie rocker Wears: Anything from Buffalo Exchange. Can be spotted: PCL too much, Mohawk, Wheatsville. So you like your music catchy and easygoing. The Marmalakes are a folk pop outfit that will remind you of Fleet Foxes and Grizzly Bear with their soaring harmonies and attention to stuckin-your-head-for-weeks song-craft. Likewise, The Sour Notes deliver in the same department with their surf-rock-pop. For a funkier smell, get a whiff of The Bright Light Social Hour. These bros have been cutting their teeth in Austin for some time now, even headlining the infamous Hot Sauce Festival. The Hour effortlessly jump from genres—funk, indie, classic rock—creating an instant party wherever they go. Slightly related to the efforts of BLSH is Zorch. One part Flaming Lips, two parts Mars Volta, Zorch dial up the ecstasy to eleven with their whirling keyboard melodies and frenetic, octopus drumming. *Editor’s note: Tia Carrera, the band, should not be confused with Tia Carrere, musician and actress most well-known for her role as Cassandra Wong in Wayne’s World and Wayne’s World 2.

William Bass

The Patch Gears of War 3 released Gears of War 3 was released Tuesday at midnight, so professors, don’t expect to see your students in your 8 am classes (though they probably wouldn’t have been there regardless.) The last game of the Gears trilogy is promising to be just as good, if not even better, than its predecessors. New features include a selection of eight possible playable characters, new weapons, such as the Digger (a grenade launchers that travels underground to discourage campers,) and the Silverback, a “sweet power loader outfitted with chainguns taken right out of Aliens.” The game also includes new multiplayer and online features. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Gears of War 2 online was for shit.” Well rest assured that playing in live in Gears 3 was given ample attention and it shows. Online will now be hosted on a Dedicated Server run by Microsoft, so you can’t complain about host advantages anymore, fixes in matchmaking and laggy screens have been made to create a much better multiplayer experience than the second game in the trilogy, and there’s a new mode called Beast-

Mode, where you can actually play as the Locust horde. The game offers new “crisp visuals, fractured lighting and billowy smoke effects bring the world to life, giving this final and ever-decaying vision of Sera a tangible sense of place. The sound design creates one of the more cohesive combinations of music and sound effects in any game, fashioning an immediately recognizable experience” according to IGNs review of the game, and it’s safe to assume that the story-line and playability are just as amazing. For those of you who pre-ordered and received the game, I hope for your sake that you know someone to pay off to do your homework for the next semester or so.

Tokyo Game show It happened. It’s gone now. You didn’t miss much. Except maybe this:

free to Play DC Universe is going free to play in October, so for those of you who have backed off because

of a monthly fee, welcome back to Metropolis. The game will be free for download for the PS3 and the PC. Free can only get you so far though, the game still has to make money. Premium and Legendary memberships will be provided for those who qualify (mostly meaning those who do actually pay for something in the game ranging from $5-15.) Portal is now also free to play as well through Steam. If you’ve never heard of Portal, but enjoy brain puzzles and problem solving, this is the game for you. The map graphics

are simple yet fantastic and the fluidity of the game keeps you playing for hours until you finish the entire game. (I sat down and played 4 hours straight without realizing it.) The only speaking character in the game, GLaDOS, provides backhanded commentary, though, while rude, at one point in the game you really start to miss her constant belittling. So if you’re just as broke as me, know that you still have gaming options to further delay you from getting a job.

ARRyn zeCh

CENTRAL TEXAS NEEDS YOUR HELP

www.fbombforever.com

Can’t hardly wait

Enjoying everything else thErE arE a Million rEasons not to have sex: STDs, pregnancy, emotional vulnerability, the fact that vaginae are icky. The list goes on. But while abstinence-only sex education terrifies teens into waiting till marriage, it forgets one of the most compelling arguments in favor of delaying intercourse: Sometimes the build-up is better. Whether you’re afraid of invoking God’s terrible wrath, or just not ready to make an emotional commitment, it’s perfectly fine to take some time before doing the deed. But the mistake people often make is regarding that waiting period as something to be endured, rather than a journey enjoyed on its own merits. Because once you start having sex, the other stuff tends to fall by the wayside. For those practicing the “anything but” school of abstinence, the road to eventual intercourse can be a scenic route with plenty of beautiful vistas to be enjoyed. If a couple is creative and takes the time to get comfortable with each other, there are a million available options that are just as good, if not better, than the traditional old in-and-out. So rather than waiting impatiently for that final destination, here are some detours worth checking out.

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

MaKinG oUT

heavy PeTTinG

When you’re swapping spit with a hottie you just met at a party, making out is thrilling, spontaneous, and sexy. When you’ve been at it for two hours straight with a serious significant other, it’s a tedious battle of bruised tongues. Keeping snogging sexy (that’s what the Brits call it) is as simple as bringing back the spontaneity and risk. Don’t just do it in the dorm room, that’s

A person can feel a surprising amount through a thin layer of denim. Though dry humping usually becomes all but extinct once people reach sexually active maturity, it’s a crying shame since frustrated, passionate, barely restrained grinding is sexy as hell. With lips locked and bodies pressed together, but skin-to-skin contact off the agenda, well-positioned knees and thighs suddenly become impressively adept sex toys.

“Whether you’re afraid of invoking God’s terrible wrath, or just not ready to make an emotional commitment, it’s perfectly fine to take some time before doing the deed..” a recipe for chapped lips and boredom. Twist tongues in unused corners of the PCL, locked bathrooms at Kerbey Lane, or the back row of a bad movie at the Alamo Drafthouse. As the PG version of public sex, adventurous make-outs provide all the fun without the real risk that comes from having your genitals exposed in public spaces.

Though how it ends is up to each individual couple, it should be said that coming in one’s pants is generally preferable to a cold shower.

MUTUal MasTUrbaTion Just think of it as same-room Skype sex. A lot of couples skip this step, since masturbation tends to be regarded as a

shameful, solo affair, but those that take the time to give it a try are well-rewarded for their efforts. Instead of having clueless partners awkwardly tugging and jamming fingers at each other, each person is in charge of their own pleasure. Everyone gets to do what they like best, while their partner is hopefully taking mental notes for future reference. Also, since connection is primarily maintained through talking and eye contact, it’s a great way to build the sexual communication that keeps things fun and consensual during more advanced sex acts.

oral sex Attention heterosexual college females: Oral sex is not a one-way street. If you go down on him, he should be doing the same for you. No excuses. It doesn’t matter if you’ve waxed recently or he says he doesn’t like the taste. Do you like the taste of his semen? Probably not. If you think you don’t like receiving oral sex, that’s because your partner is doing it wrong. Tell him what feels good and what doesn’t until he gets it right. Remember, practice makes perfect, and men with their mouths full can’t complain.

deVon tinCKnell

Community Laboratory Co-Lab arts space moves beyond the confines of the gallery

Photos: Co-Lab Space

Going though our daily grinds, it’s sometimes hard to ask questions. School, bills, and work usually keep us busy enough, buried in our own petite reality tunnels. Luckily, for us lazy, and busy, folks artists are doing it for us. Exploring and imploding our conceptions about the world while creating new ones. There is no place in Austin that is doing more of the above than Co-Lab. A community oriented arts space that is oriented towards new media projects, Co-Lab offers a different experience for artists and patrons alike that galleries or museums refuse to tread into. An experience of freedom and exploration amongst its exhibitions while engendering a community that blurs the boundaries between artists and patrons. Likewise, the public usually perceives the art scene as being exclusive. On the contrary, Co-Lab seems to be engendering a more democratic approach to the way the interact with their patrons and artists alike.

“I feel that sometimes the public is more reluctant to see/experience an exhibit or performance because the Art World can seem like an exclusive club of those ‘in the know’,” said Co-Lab directorSean Gaulager. “I hope that Co-Lab’s open attitude would convince those individuals otherwise, letting them know that coming in with open eyes and minds and simply leaving with an experience is enough to ‘get it’.” One of the main assets of Co-Lab is

of the most versatile spaces in the city. “The one uniqueness that defines Co-Lab

My favorite moments are ongoing and frequent. They usually come about when a new idea is conceived in the yard around the fire or sitting on a picnic table. its rapid schedule; exhibits fly in just as fast as they fly out, making Co-Lab one

is the vigorous programming schedule,” said Gaulager. “Audiences can come to the space every weekend and see something completely different than the last.” Indeed, Co-Lab is a workhorse arts space--a space that never really seems to sleep “ In an ongoing mission to exhibit a wide array of artists and works we have been showing new works weekly and/or biweekly for over three years.” The phrase new media can bring up stuffy connotations of art MFAs and elitist galleries. For the folks at Co-Lab new media is kind of a misnomer. While the space is focused on alternative mediums, artists working in more classical mediums like paint and sculpture exhibit but not in the usual terms set out by museums or galleries. “Multipaintiplication is another, really good and complicated example of how this idea of new media can really span a variety of art. Multipaint was a show conceived as

a collaboration where we literally asked a specific set of artists to come in and just paint a giant mural on all the walls in response to one another,” said Co-Lab founder Leslie Castro. “However, artists were working with paint, a very traditional medium. What made Multipaint “new media” was really the process of collaboration and how the artists worked so well together.” Nevertheless, Co-Lab embodies yet transcends the limitations of the traditional art space. Instead of limiting itself to merely a place to come and experience art, Co-Lab functions more as a factory for ideas and communication between artists and patrons. “My favorite moments are ongoing and frequent,” said Gaulager. “They usually come about when a new idea is conceived in the yard around the fire or sitting on a picnic table,” Co-Lab is located at 613 Allen St. More information regarding upcoming and current exhibitions can be found at www.colabspace.org

William Bass

Co-Lab maintains an open and ongoing call for ideas/proposals in collaborative, installation, performance, new media, public, workshops, sustainability and community based projects. Please contact them for details.

UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

barstars photos: Shannon grant

CALLING GREEKS EVENTS

THE LOCAL 2610 guadalupe Street

wednesdays are dollar beer

chUPacaBr a nights!

400 east Sixth Street

fundrai

sers

hrop t n a l i ph

TOULOUSe

BeSO

MOOSeKNUcKLe

402 east Sixth Street

307 b west 5th Street

400 east Sixth Street

advertise with

student rates available contact michael@uweeklyaustin.com

The LIBrary

The STaGe

407 east Sixth Street

508 east Sixth Street

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

barstars photos: Shannon grant

BESO

307 b west 5th Street

h lifes! 9:30 $3 long islands, $2 hig at ay esd dn we ery ev ge un Reggae lo You’re this week’s winner! Come to our office to collect $25!*

The STaGe 508 east Sixth Street

TOULOUSe 402 east Sixth Street

MOOSEKNUCKLE

chUPacaBr a

406 east Sixth Street

400 east Sixth Street

*if your face is circled, you’re this week’s winner of barstars! Come to our oﬃce at 2608 east Sixth Street, unit 3 mon through wed (9–5 p.m.) to collect $25 cash! (512) 358-4149

FOR MORE PARTY PICS, GO TO UWEEKLYAUSTIN.COM. 25

Super Crossword

Crypto Quip This is a simple substitution cipher in which each letter used stands for another. If you think that X equals O, it will equal O throughout the puzzle. Solution is accomplished by trial and error.

TITLED TITLES

CLUE: F EQUALS M

Sudoku

The Secret Sisters

Pho

to: S

ecr et S

iste

The 21st century guide to traditional country The Secret Sisters were made for a festival like Austin City Limits. An adorable duo of real-life sisters raised on Hank Williams and acoustic guitars, playing honest, stripped-down traditional country. It’s exactly the type of independence ACL was born to facilitate. Their debut record pulls no punches in its influence, in fact they have almost an equal number of covers in their repertoire, but the genuine love for the craft they’re emulating is universally palatable. They’re an easy group of girls to root for. We at Uweekly caught up with the sisters backstage to talk about their songwriting, their history, and their brief love affair with the Ramones. I’ve always appreciated how you guys stick to what you love in terms of songwriting influences, what made you first fall in love with traditional country? I think we liked the simplicity of it, it’s not hard to write songs like that but they emanate honesty and purity, that era of music was just so real. It told stories about things that weren’t easy to talk about. It was very simple and very clever at the same time. It just hits you. It feels like home. Of course it helped that we always had that playing at home.

All our lives, since we could talk. But professionally not until last summer. We weren’t on a stage together until all this started happening.

Are you parents really proud of you? Of course, they’ve been very supportive, they’ve been coming to a lot of our shows – they even surprised us in Dublin. They like that we’ve taken music that’s special to our family and making something out of it.

“Country is about letting your feelings out. You’re frustrated because someone is cheating on you? Write a song about it. You’re frustrated because you’re broke? Write a song about it.” At what age did you guys realize that those songs were about some mature topics?

I think your material has a certain confessional vibe to it, would you agree?

In our teens, a lot of times you sing those songs and you don’t think about the lyrics, and it can be a little deceiving. Its funny now being an adult and realizing that you were listening to some dark stuff when you were younger.

Absolutely, I think that’s one of the important parts of country music, it’s about letting your feelings out. You’re frustrated because someone is cheating on you? Write a song about it. You’re frustrated because you’re broke? Write a song about it.

When did you start singing together?

Do you feel like you’re upholding a tradition?

I think we are, but I don’t know if it’s a conscious effort. I think its happening because we love the music; we’re not trying to incite anything. We play it because we couldn’t think of playing anything else, if its part of a revolution great, if not, it doesn’t matter.

Would you ever consider moving out of country? Oh yeah, we’re really open. As much as we love country music, we love early rock, blues, jazz, all sorts of stuff. We actually didn’t like country too much in our teens, we had a little rebellion. After being around bluegrass and country for so long, we turned to the Ramones for a while. And we still love them. We did a single with Jack White last year that was kinda in that vein, which was really cool. I’d like to explore, especially rock, our next record will be more diverse.

Are you already thinking about the next record? Yeah we’ve been writing a lot, we’re gonna be recording in January of next year.

Do you have any sort of vision for it yet? Right now it’s still up in the air; we’ve just continued writing and weed it out from there. Let the songs situate themselves and define our sound from them. I really do feel like the second record will be career-defining. Our first album was full of cover songs, which was fine, but we want to establish ourselves as songwriters. We’d like to show the world what we have to say. That’s just part of the business.

Do you think people know who The Secret Sisters are yet? I think we’re on our way, over the work we’ve been doing we’ve made progress, but there’s still room to grow. We’re really hopeful about it.

Luke Winkie

the secret sisters will be playing in Grand Prairie on Oct. 28 at the Verizon theatre with Paul Simon before starting their European tour. UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

Wednesday

Black Red Black @ The Highball, 1120 S Lamar

Jazz is a precarious thing in Austin. Existing only in the closed cage of the Elephant Room or occasionally freed with the wild free jazz stints of Epistrophy Arts, there just aren’t that many opportunities to hear this type of music in a city that worships the guitar. Luckily, The Highball is giving us one with this explosive trio. Filled out by Ephraim Owens, Red Young, and Brannen Temple, Black Red Black is a musical powerhouse that must be dealt with live.

The No Shame Sing-Along

@ Alamo Ritz, 320 E 6th

Neon Indian Afterparty @ Blazer Tag, 1701 W Ben White

While the tickets to Neon Indian’s inside show at the Mohawk might have gone faster than hotcakes, the Indian himself along with Learning Secrets are throwing a huge after party at Blazer Tag, of all places. Along with the crunchy jams, party-goers will get the opportunity to imbibe in a huge lazer tag tournament with the winner receiving a FFF Fest pass or a PIP upgrade if they have already purchased a pass. Ready, aim, tag!

Tickets: Free

►►Also Worthy

The Horrors

Hanson

Jacuzzi Boys

Kaiser Chiefs

El John Selector

Soul Happening

The Megaphone Show (Improv Comedy)

Grits and Gravy (Soul Dance Party)

Jimmie Vaughan

Ladies Ride

Deaf Wish

’80s Dance Party

Elvis

Block Party (Comedy Open Mic)

Weight (Dubstep)

La Zona Rosa, 612 W 4th The New Movement Theater, 1819 Rosewood Fast Folks Cyclery, 2513 E 6th Beerland, 711 Red River

Will bass 28

The Action Pack Presents:

friday

You know that awful feeling. You are belting out your favorite terrible song in your car (insert Hall & Oats, Lionel Ritchie, or Lady Gaga song here), and someone rolls up next to you and proceeds to laugh at you with his friends. Your head hangs in shame as you go home and hide under your favorite blanket. Now you can take shelter with your fellow Goo Goo Dolls fans as you belt out all your favorite soft rock hits together. Ahh, friendship.

The Parish, 214 E 6th

The top events & shows in Austin this week

thursday

September 21, 2011 | UWeeklyAustin.com

Tickets: www.originalalamo.com

Antone’s, 213 W 5th Kung Fu Saloon, 510 Rio Grande Barbarella, 615 Red River Beerland, 711 Red River The New Movement Theater, 1819 Rosewood

Tickets: www.transmission.frontgatetickets.com

Red 7, 611 E 7th White Swan, 1906 E 12th Antone’s, 213 W 5th

The Highball, 1120 S Lamar Plush, 617 Red River

saturday

sunday

monday

Monday Night Mash @ Coldtowne Theater, 4803 Airport

Satisfying your insatiable urge for everything free, funny, and awesome, Coldtowne’s Monday night mash will tickle your funny bone but won’t pinch your back pocket. Three of Austin’s finest will do their best to win your comedic approval.

►►Also Worthy

“Weird Al” Yankovic

TV at the Alamo: “Breaking Bad”

Jason Blum

@ ACL Live at the Moody Theater

@ Alamo South Lamar, 1120 S Lamar

Dale Watson

After tearing the space-time continuum of song parody at FFF Fest last year with his accordion solos, Weird Al is set to bring his Alpocalypse back to Austin. The Moody Theater will try and contain the four horsemen of the Alpocalypse as they rear their ugly heads. Al is currently riding a wave of popularity as a new generation of pop stars are already providing fresh kebobs for Al’s skewers. Tickets: www.acl-live.com/

The age of the Internet might have made TVwatching a little more convenient. However, this convenience is at the expense of quality. Computer screens are no way to have a proper viewing experience. Luckily for us, the Alamo Drafthouse is helping to remedy this problem with their TV at the Alamo series. Come out and watch everyone’s favorite show, “Breaking Bad,” as you gorge yourself on nachos and beer. Tickets: www.drafthouse.com

Mohawk, 912 Red River The Continental Club, 1315 S Congress

Rock N Roll Karaoke Beerland, 711 Red River

tuesday

Wolves in the Throne Room @ Red 7, 611 E 7th

What in the hell is Black Metal? Think long songs, blast beats (i.e. really fast drumming), and shrieked vocals with an urge towards creating an atmosphere rather than merely a song. There is no better entry into this genre than Wolves in the Throne Room, especially live.

►►Also Worthy

DJ Kenya

A House A Home

TV Torso

Honey Honey

Marcia Ball

Authority Zero

Emo’s, 603 Red River

►►Also Worthy

Tia Carrera

Ojala

Junior Boys

Kung Fu Saloon, 510 Rio Grande Emo’s, 603 Red River Antone’s, 213 W 5th 29th Street Ballroom, 2906 Fruth St.

Midnight Playground Barcelona, 209 E 6th

Beauty Bar, 617 E 7th Stubb’s, 601 Red River

Momo’s, 618 W 6th

Laserzs

Cheer Up Charlie’s, 1104 E 6th

Tickets: www.transmission.frontgatetickets.com

Mohawk, 912 Red River

Befriend the Bears Beauty Bar, 617 E 7th

UWeeklyAustin.com | September 21, 2011

► pluCKeRS

► FRiendS

(2222 rio grande st.)

(208 E 6th st.)

Mother Plucker Mugs

$2 vodka Bombs

► SApphiRe

► the libRARy

(411 E 6th st.)

(407 E 6th st.)

$2 you holla!

$1 domestics, wells $2 import Bottles

► Fuel

► touChe

(607 trinity)

(417 E 6th st.)

$1 wells, $2 domestics, $3 any Bombs

$1 schnapps

Antone’s 213 west fifth street

► RooFtop bAR

► tinieSt bAR in teXAS

(2716 guadalupe)

(817 w 5th st.)

$4 long island teas

$1 Bud light and Bud

► CAin And Abel’S

► tRudy’S

(2313 rio grande)

(409 w 30th st.)

$3.50 bombs

$4.50 ritas

► CuAtRoS

► mooSeKnuCKle pub

(1004 w. 24th st.)

(406 E 6th)

$7 pitchers, $2.50 wells, $1 off all bottled beers

$2 wells/domestics til 11 pm

► AgAVe

► biKini’S SpoRtS bAR & gRill

fixture in downtown Austin since 1975, Antone’s first opened as a jazz club on 6th street but has since moved just down the street to west 5th. While Antone’s has served as a launching pad for the careers of artists likes Eric Clapton and Bono, it also features many prominent artists today, including a particularly fond memory this writer has of a Devin the Dude concert Antone’s hosted last spring semester. Like Devin, I often sit back and wonder “what a job this is” when I realize my occupation is just to write about sports and drinking, but that’s just the way it is.

bRiAn bogARt

► RAin on 4th

(607 trinity)

(6901 i-35)

(217 w 4th)

$0.50 wells, $2 any beers, $3 mixed shots, $3 bombs

$4 Big daddy drafts

$1.50 lite Beers, $2.50 wells

► tReASuRe iSlAnd

► gingeR mAn

► thiRd bASe

(413 E 6th)

(301 lavaca st.)

(1717 w 6th)

$0.25 wells, $1 triples and kamikaze shots, $4 bombs

logo Pint night

$2 lonestar/fireman/shiner

► Spill

► lAVACA St. bAR

► motheR egAn’S

(212 E 6th)

(405 lavaca st)

(715 w 6th)

$1 wells/Miller high life

Big Beer Mondays. $6 25oz.

Pint specials during Pub trivia

307B West 5th Street www.besocantina.com

BACK

SCHOOL

H S BA sept 24

GAMES PRIZES

2610 Guadalupe (Next to Kerby Lane)