Debbie Carrie

My husband, Johnno, and I have faced some tough stuff over the past ten years. Thankfully, not in our marriage, but in many other areas. In dealing with all these challenges, I asked God to help me see things from heaven’s perspective. Ephesians 2:6 tells us that we are seated in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus. I wanted to learn how to live from heaven to earth and not be ruled by the trials we faced. I’m so grateful I did, because on 3rd December 2016 I had to face my Goliath - the hardest thing I’ve ever had to journey.

In the early evening, Johnno received a call from a young lady asking if we had a son who rode a motorbike. There had been an accident and we needed to get there quickly. Johnno asked if Andrew was alive and she said he was but was badly hurt. A drunk driver, overtaking at speed, had hit him.

A couple of hours later at the hospital, we were called aside to be told that our larger than life, beautiful 28-year-old boy was brain dead – it was devastating.

We went into the trauma unit where he’d been taken, with about 30 precious friends who’d come to be with us, to trust God for a miracle. I can remember the lioness rising in me as I saw Andrew. I began to pray and declare life over our very still boy. I rebuked a spirit of death and prayed my heart out! Others prayed, we sang and we worshipped.

Johnno and I had been up since 4am that day and we were advised to go home and get

some rest as all we could do now was wait for a miracle. I’ll never forget the love poured out by wonderful friends who stayed right through the night. At around 1am we received another call to say Andrew’s condition had deteriorated and we needed to come to the hospital. I’ll also never forget standing around his bed in the ICU in the early hours of the morning with about 30 others, singing Good Good Father and each person telling him we loved him and what he meant to us. The presence of God was so thick that a nurse later remarked that she didn’t know how every patient wasn’t healed! Heaven had invaded our space as Andy invaded heaven.

A few days later I told God how sad I was that I’d never see Andrew become a dad. He was amazing with children and had told us often that he couldn’t wait to be a dad. I suddenly had a very clear vision of a huge room in heaven, filled with little ones. I saw Andrew in the middle of them all as they played, rolling around and climbing on him and he was hugging them. I knew in my spirit that these were the miscarried and aborted babies. I heard God say, “he will father more here in heaven than he ever would have on earth.”

I told this story at his memorial and afterwards had the privilege of praying for two precious ladies who’d carried the pain of abortion for a long time. God our healer touched them.

Over the last few years, all my preconceptions have been blown away - I’ve learnt to ask God HOW to walk things through, rather than WHY. I’ve come to know Him deeply and I’ve experienced

His loving kindness and goodness daily. He is MY EVERYTHING and He’s taught me so much. Something I struggled with, was well meaning people telling me that the devil had robbed Andrew of life.

Andrew was walking a radical road with Jesus, particularly in the 6 months before the accident. I also knew that the devil was no match for our beautiful Father, who had whispered a verse to me from John 12:24 over and over: “Unless a seed falls to the ground and dies it does not bear fruit, but if it dies it bears much fruit”. I do not for one second believe that God caused the accident, but I am so grateful that I had been asking Him for heaven’s perspective. I have come to realise that it is very different from just what we see in the natural. A week or so after Andrew left us, we found a song he’d written that I think might blow some of your preconceptions too. It is called ‘Crossroads’.

I’m at this crossroad I’ve been here before And my feet are sticking to the floor There’s an old car coming my way And I’m torn whether to go or stay But I’ve just got to pack my bags and leave this place Take heart son, you’ve got courage and breath in your lungs

I guess this is what you would call a prophetic song, and I am just going to leave it at that.

The last thing I’m going to share with you is this. Long before Andrew left us, I always believed that Steve (our eldest son) and Nix would have a little boy. I loved to pray prophetically into this little one’s life and one day while praying, the name Seth popped into my mind. I was grateful that at least it was a boy’s name and told God I would look up the meaning when I got home. I forgot to do that and again heard, “Seth” - I said, “Okay Lord, I’m going now”. I nearly dropped my phone when I saw that Seth means ‘anointed’, ‘compensation’! While I knew that this would not be the name given to him, I had no doubt that my amazing Father was saying I am going to restore, I am going to give you a little one to love and to help your family heal. About 6 weeks later, the pregnancy was announced and on 13 April 2018, we welcomed our precious Zach into our family. He is the light of our lives and we just adore him!

The pain in this journey has been real, but so has the peace. I miss Andrew hugely and I would give anything for one of his bear hugs, but we have eternity to enjoy together and the legacy he has left here has blown me away. I am so honoured that I was chosen to be his mom.

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Debbie and her husband John live and work in Durban, South Africa. They have three children and one grandson. She is the owner and creative brain behind of H I S Apparel “the best men’s shirt brand on the planet”. They are part of Harvest Church, Umhlanga