LIVING IN OBEDIENCE Puleng Mamabolo

It was over a decade ago when my husband and I had heeded the call to be in full-time ministry as a couple. In our conversation preceding our transition from life as we knew it, the big question was, “Why do we do what we do?”

The answer we both wholeheartedly embraced was, we do what we do out of obedience unto the Lord. I had no idea what I was signing up for, despite being in ministry previously as a single person. Perhaps I thought my previous experiences had adequately prepared me for what would come because my wilful surrender was out of pure ignorance yet in complete reverence for Father. And, honestly, with the hope that it won’t get as difficult as it did, now that I had a companion.

Leaving the “successful” life and the exciting prospects thereof was an initiation into the many unexpected turns and uncertainties of ministry. It was hard leaving home - family, friends, community, and our everyday familiar life into the world of the unknown. We went believing that this was what God had been calling us to for two years, and with trembling hearts but showing brave and excited faces, we left home in Pretoria to the Eastern Cape, South Africa.

We joined our first organisation as a newly married couple in our second year of matrimony surrounded by almost all strangers. Still, our hearts were at peace though our minds were flooded with a gazillion questions and uncertainties of great proportions.

At the halfway mark of the second year of commitment to the particular organisation, we started praying for direction - whether to continue with the same organisation or whether God had something different.

There came a pattern of submission and surrender, aligning us with the Word we received initially, living in obedience to God. Almost every second or third year in ministry, we are brought to our knees seeking God’s will and way... “Should we stay, or do You have something else planned, Lord?”.

Can I say I am change-reluctant by design? I have enjoyed the same things for a long time and prefer an undisrupted routine and a predictable way of

life. I love having the same people be part of my life forever. Yet, this life of obedience is completely the opposite of all that. So, whenever we seek God’s face for where to or what to next, it isn’t what I want, to be honest. It is always a time of great tension in my heart and doesn’t make sense to my human brain. The question in my tantrumthrowing moment would be, “Lord, why did You make me this way when You knew You were going to require this kind of life of me?”.

In His gentle yet firm voice, He responds, “Because I am God and sovereign. I have a plan and purpose for your life. Will you trust me, Puleng?”.

The move we recently made is the sixth in our thirteen-year marriage. With this latest move, we were yet again swept from Jeffreys Bay into literally the middle of nowhere, Middelburg (no pun intended), still in South Africa in the very same province.

However, I should admit, I was so tired of moving that even with obvious direction and confirmations, I still wanted to talk to a couple of people besides

my husband to be “completely sure” it was from the Lord, with the hopes that there would be a different voice.

But God doesn’t disappoint, hey? One of my mentors said, “You shouldn’t even be asking about this; surely it’s clear what the Lord is saying to you?”

Living in obedience isn’t easy, but definitely worth all the struggle and pain one goes through because this life I live is not my own but His.

Eventually, after God’s response in each instance, I would say, “Your will, not mine, and Your way always. May Your perfect will, not the permissive one, be done in and through my life,” with tears flooding my cheeks, yet another yielding moment reminding me that He is my Father and Lord, and I am His child and servant in His kingdom.

My life is not what I would have imagined - it’s so much more because of God’s call on our lives.