Carlisle's Village Link Magazine | Mar/Apr 2017

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MARCH/APRIL 2017

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Village Link

ENTERTAINING READERS & WORKING HARD FOR OUR ADVERTISERS

Welcome

I

t’s about time I wrote about this. My wife will still call it pig-headedness, but happily, I’ve discovered there’s more to it. It is a scenario familiar to long-suffering wives and kids everywhere. Hopelessly lost in a village in Spain last year, trying to find a water park, I point-blank refused to ask for directions, choosing instead to grit my teeth and drive faster into unknown territory. While the reluctance of male drivers to accept any outside help certainly seems like pigheadedness, it may actually stem from a less macho cause: blind panic. While women are more than happy to use all available resources to help them reach a goal, men will rigidly stick to their original “system” – such as a map or set of directions – even though it has clearly led them astray. Being forced to confront the fact that their system does not work makes men flustered and usually results in them putting the pedal to the floor in a desperate bid to avoid the reality of the situation. In the context of a car journey, men may refuse to ask directions because doing so would be tantamount to admitting that their system was not working. If you admit a system doesn’t work once, the fear creeps in that it doesn’t work at all and so there is a panic. Men won’t admit it, but that is one theory why men don’t ask for directions. It’s not just whilst out on the road either. It is a little like creating something from a box – the

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women will read the instructions to find out how it should be done and the men will just go forth and see what bits are left over. Spring - it literally is a breath of fresh air. As the days get longer, the nights get shorter, it starts to feel warmer, finally heralding goodbye to the winter coat and gloves. What a welcome relief it is each year, following our dismal dark winters, to have the delight of the half-forgotten sensation of warm sun. Anyway, last issue was busy with competitions, so here are our winners; Miss Anne Taylor won a bottle of Champagne in our Crossword Competition, courtesy of The Crown Hotel, Wetheral, Colin Redwood won our Where’s Winston competition via Facebook, winning a BMW Golfsport brolly and iPhone 6 Carbon Fibre case courtesy of Lloyd BMW, and big congrats to Tabitha (and her little brother Oscar) who found Bear in Rickerby Village.

Andrew Andrew Corrie EDITOR

www.village-link.co.uk editor@village-link.co.uk /villagelinkcarlisle @VLink_Carlisle

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All pages are copyright of either Village Link Magazine or its respective contributors. All material published in Village Link including editorials, adverts and all other content is printed in good faith. However, Village Link accepts no liability for the content of the material or the services provided by the advertisers nor does it endorse any company featured. No part of this publication may be reproduced, copied or transmitted in any form without the publisher’s written permission. All material is accepted on the understanding that its publication does not infringe any copyright. Village Link does not accept responsibility from claims of copyright infringement.

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LOCAL BUSINESS

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50 years ago this March/April ... 1967 • Mar 1st - Dominica & St Lucia gain independence from Britain • Mar 1st - Queen Elizabeth Hall in London’s South Bank Centre opens • Apr 2 - Actress Lynn Redgrave marries John Clark

Grange can just be seen beneath Castle Crag in the trees.

he folk of Cumberland and Westmorland (now Cumbria of course) generally used to think of the Borrowdale people as rather simple and unsophisticated. In the same way that an Englishman tells jokes about the Irish, or a German tells jokes about the Swiss, so the Burghers of Keswick told tales about the inhabitants of Borrowdale. These were recorded in 1855 by author and traveller Harriet Martineau. “It is said that an old Borrowdale Man was once sent a very long way for something very new, by some innovator who had found his way into the dale. The man was to go with horse and sacks (for there were no carts, because there was no road, to bring some lime from beyond Keswick.) On his return, when he was near Grange, it began to rain; and the man was alarmed at seeing his sacks begin to smoke. He got a hatful of water from the river; but the smoke grew worse. Assured at length that the devil must be in any fire that was aggravated by water, he tossed the whole load into the river.

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That must have been before the dalesmen built their curious wall; for they must have had lime for that. Spring being very charming in Borrowdale, and the sound of the cuckoo gladsome, the people determined to build a wall to keep in the cuckoo, and make the spring last forever. So they built a wall across the entrance, at Grange. The plan did not answer; but that was, according to the popular belief from generation to generation, because the wall was not built one course higher. It is simply for want of a top course in that wall that eternal spring does not reign in Borrowdale.” This and other amusing and not so amusing historical snippets from Lakeland’s past can be read in the book The English Lakes; tales from History, Legend and Folklore available from www.p3publications.com and Bookends in Carlisle.

Written by David Ramshaw www.village-link.co.uk

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MOTORING

INTRODUCING THE NEW BIGGER

MINI Countryman

A d d s pa c e . A d d s to r i e s. A d d a d v e n t u r e .

Rebecca Sharpe, from Lloyd Group writes...

D

o you have a desire to explore? We’re talking about an insatiable hunger for adventure. No plans, no maps – no worries. Enter the new MINI Countryman. Get ready to venture down the path less trodden, it’s time to pack more in. The new MINI Countryman is the most versatile MINI to date. The spacious and luxurious interior seats five adults; now with even more legroom the tallest of passengers can comfortably stretch their legs out on long journeys, from city trips to country getaways. Whether you’re fitting three adults in the back, or three suitcases in the boot, the adjustable rear seat bench moves backwards for up to 13cm extra legroom.

There is also the option to fold the back seats down in a 40/20/40 split, or take advantage of a longitudinal adjustment of the seats for a 60/40 split. The new improved boot can hold up to 450 litres – an impressive 100 litres more than the previous MINI Countryman model. This equates to room for 4 more regular sized backpacks. With the seats down, the boot space increases to 1,390 litres, which is 220 litres more than the original Countryman model. We told you it was impressive. As well as enhanced product quality and design, the new MINI Countryman benefits from improved standard specification. Welcoming you to your MINI Countryman is MINI Logo Projection. Neatly integrated into the drivers’ wing mirror, the MINI wings light the way to your next adventure. Once inside, you’ll feel the benefit of the 20cm of extra length resulting in 5cm of extra legroom making for a comfortable ride. A 6.5 inch colour screen situated in the centre console is standard across the Countryman range. This includes MINI Sat Nav, MINI Connected, DAB and Bluetooth hands-free with USB audio. The leather multi-function steering wheel features cruise control, and reversing is made easier with rear park distance control, with the option for a rear camera.

The new MINI Countryman is made for adventure so for a true off-road look, every MINI Countryman comes with roof rails and side sills in silver as standard. Stay in control regardless of the condition with the optional ALL4 system. The four-wheel drive system distributes the power dynamically between the front and rear axles. Depending on your driving style and your grip on the road, the ALL4 all-wheel drive system calculates the optimal torque for each wheel. In extreme situations, all of the engine’s torque can be directed to the rear axle, helping you power your way out of the toughest situations. See the bigger picture and discover the new, more spacious MINI Countryman. Get in touch with the team at Lloyd Carlisle MINI on 01228 404 505 to arrange your test drive today, or visit lloydmotorgroup.com/MINI to find out more. Who’s in?

LLOYD MINI

Kingstown Broadway, Kingstown Industrial Estate, Carlisle, CA3 0HA Tel: 01228 404505 • www.lloydminicarlisle.co.uk

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LOCAL BUSINESS

Be your own kind of

TRANQUILITY by Donna Barron

A warm and friendly environment awaits you at my professional salon, within my home, right in the heart of Scotby village. • Waxing • KORE Therapy • Tinting • Cupping Therapy • Lava Shells Massage • Indian head massage • Threading • Gua Sha facials • Lash extensions • Specialist massage treatments • Manicures & pedicures • CND Shellac manicures & Pedicures • Reflexology

Call 07717 847668 01228 319667

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Over 4 decades of combined experience in windows, doors, conservatories and facia

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beautiful donna barron (tranquility) oFFERS A warm, tranquil environment for you to enjoy some much need ‘me time’

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eet Donna Barron, a beauty and holistic therapist. She graduated from Carlisle College back in 03’ with dreams of pursuing a career in which she could immerse herself in her two passions in life; meeting new people and helping her clients to be the best that they can be, either through promoting better alignment and posture through KORE therapy or helping them to feel more confident with a range of beauty treatments. Donna is Carlisle born and bred, and having worked at various salons across Carlisle and Cumbria for the last 13 years, she has now decided to open her own salon called Tranquility, located in Scotby Village on the outskirts of Carlisle, to take a new step in her career and to be closer to her family. She now splits her time between her beloved clients and her son. Her biggest achievement to date has been the completion of the KORE therapy course, which has fastly become her most popular treatment. As mentioned above, KORE is designed to promote better alignment, especially for those with bad backs, shoulders or any other ailments. These tailor made treatments combine Eastern and Western techniques to get to the root of the problem and is especially useful for old injuries that have got progressively worse over time. Other popular treatments include the Chinese

“Cupping” therapy, which involves the use of glass cups and is used as a form of alternative medicine as it helps to reduce pain and improve blood flow. As well as this, the rather exotic Gua Sha Facial is also on offer, this treatment helps to reduce the signs of fine lines and wrinkles along with skin sagging and dark circles under the eyes. As well as these exotic treatments, she also offers all of the traditional beauty and holistic treatments such as reflexology, threading, tinting, manicures, pedicures, waxing, lash extensions, as well as traditional massages and those with shells and stones. Donna welcomes clients both old and new with a friendly and personal touch and has plans to transform the lives of the Carlisle residents one appointment at a time. To make an appointment contact Donna via Mobile: 07717 847668 Social Media - Twitter, Facebook, Instagram : Tranquility by Donna Barron

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LOCAL BUSINESS

Southwells Chimney & Stove Services With more than 18 years experience in both Domestic and Industrial chimneys, along with Solid fuel services, you can have confidence in our work.

Having your chimney swept on a regular basis will help avoid costly and dangerous situations. Chimneys Swept Using a brush and rods, the chimney is given a thorough clean while the fireplace is sealed to keep the soot inside the Dust Sheet, after which an industrial Vac is used to clear away any residue around the Hearth and chimney Flues. It is recommended that your chimney be swept at least once a year. Flue Lined Chimneys Swept Standard Rods can damage the Liners, so special Rods and brushes are used to clean the liner safely. Blocked Chimneys Opened Up A chimney can sometimes become blocked with masonry and requires the chimney wall opening up so as to clear the way. By pinpointing the problem area, we can keep this a quick and simple job. Nests Removed Birds are industrious builders, and can block a chimney very quickly, so we recommend a strong Birdnet is fitted to a chimney, Using special attachments we are able to break up the nest and

remove it safely. Setting fire to a nest is not recommended as this is not only dangerous but will Damage the chimney. Cowl and Birdnets Fitted We supply and fit Cowls and Nets, and are happy to advise you on the best type for your chimney. Chimney Pots Fitted Also if your stack needs attention, we are happy to help. Log Burners Serviced Fire bricks and Baffle plates inside the Burners become worn so the fire is less effective and can be damaged, so a yearly check is recommended. We can supply and fit new bricks, plates, seals and give your Fire a face lift. CCTV Surveys We can now offer to send a camera up your chimney and see clearly its condition or any existing problems so as to know how to resolve these. Agas & Rayburns Solid Fuel, Oil and Gas Flues swept.

FREE QUOTES & ADVICE • SERVING CUMBRIA & SOUTH WEST SCOTLAND David Southwell, 167 Lansdowne Crescent, Stanwix, Carlisle CA3 9ER

is ’t miss th

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*Stove may differ from one shown in these pictures.

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FOOD PEARL OF WISDOM Flamenco is a genre of Spanish music, which involves singing, dancing, guitar playing and hand clapping. Robert Vidal, a famous classical guitar professor, once said: ‘I love flamenco because it is an art form, which you don’t listen to with your ears but with your intestines. First you have to feel the music before you can think about it.’ The first literary references to flamenco were made in 1774, but it would take many years before this musical genre became familiar to the public internationally.

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FLAMENCOEGGS Mouth-watering inspiration from food editor Jane Ferguson

O

ne of the most inspiring programmes I have seen recently is Rick Stein’s series ‘Long Weekends’. I just love the wonderful variety of different foods and cultures and can never quite understand those people who go abroad and just want to find places that serve English food. I was so inspired by this series that my pasta maker, which hasn’t seen the light of day for years, was once again put to use. Exactly how long it will be put to use is yet to be seen but I am trying to remain positive in that regard.

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There is one modern trend however which slightly baffles me and that is ‘foraged’ food. It seems to be all the rage in some areas, and as was mentioned in the series these new young chefs are like the rock stars of the catering world. I remember once

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seeing a programme where live ants had been foraged and were being served in one of the courses. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of that and the term ‘emperors new clothes’ sprung to mind. Having said that these restaurants are always full and you have to book well in advance to get in, so what do I know? Having tried a few of the recipes from Rick Stein’s series I would like to share one of my favourites to date... FLAMENCO EGGS Heat 4tbsp olive oil in large lidded frying pan and cook 1 chopped small onion and 1 chopped garlic over a medium heat for about 5/10 mins. Add 80g chopped serrano ham and 1 teaspoon of hot smoked paprika and cook for about 3 mins. Add 2 tins chopped tomatoes and 1 teaspoon tomato puree. Cover pan and cook for 10/15 mins. Add 75g of peas and 100g cooked fine green beans. Break 4 free range eggs on top of sauce and arrange 12 slices of chorizo sausages and 1 sliced roasted red pepper around the eggs. Season with salt and pepper. Cook for 10 mins with lid on or until egg whites are set, about 10 minutes. Serve with garlic bread and bring a bit of Spain into your own home. www.village-link.co.uk

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ADVERTORIAL

Where did you get

that hat

SARA GADD MILLINERY

local milliner sara gadd tells us why Hat wearing has been a quintessentially British affair

I

t was in the late seventeenth century that women’s headgear began to emerge in its own right and not be influenced by men’s hat fashions. The word ‘milliner’ - a maker of women’s hats - was first recorded in 1529 when the term referred to the products for which Milan and the northern Italian regions were well known, i.e. ribbons, gloves and straws. The haberdashers who imported these highly popular straws were called ‘Millaners’ from which the word was eventually derived. During the first half of the nineteenth century the bonnet dominated women’s fashion, becoming very large with many ribbons, flowers, feathers and gauze trims giving an appearance of even greater size. By the end of the century, although bonnets were still prevalent, many other styles were to be found, including wide brims with flat crowns, the flower pot and the toque - feathers and veils abounded. From the 1930’s to the 1950’s it could be said that New York, with its many European immigrants had become the world’s leading millinery city, with department stores such as Sacs Fifth Avenue, Henri Bendel and Bergdorf Goodman leading the way with their own millinery workrooms. During the 1930’s and 40’s the tendency was for hats to have higher crowns with smaller brims and once it was War-Time again, it was mainly the trims which were changed with women making do with turbans made from pre-war materials. By the 1950’s the arrival of ready-to-wear clothes was robbing the milliners of their crucial part in the world of fashion. In the 1960’s the hat was once again overtaken by wigs and hairdressers, who colored, backcombed and sprayed women’s hair into exotic ‘sculptures’. Both men

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and women also realized that they could dress less formally and the hat was inevitably a temporary casualty. However, in the 1980’s and 90’s there was a revival of interest in women’s millinery. This was instigated, to a large extent, by public figures such as the late Princess of Wales’s enthusiasm for wearing hats. Today in a wonderfully British tradition, hats are often worn to occasions such as a day at the races, a garden party or weddings. Whatever the occasion or reason for wearing, hats have the ability to accentuate the wearers look, adding an air of mystery when worn on a slightly jaunty angle. The right hat will add to your confidence and is the perfect accessory to compliment your outfit, adding a new lease of life to your look. A hat that has been created just for you, with your personality, size, face shape and outfit having been taken into consideration, is truly a special thing and one that every lady should experience when faced with an occasion! Sara Gadd Millinery takes all this into consideration when creating or hiring headwear that is unique as you. With 15 years experience designing and hand making ladies occasion headwear, you can be sure Sara will help with all your head desires.

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local charity “Doc I can’t stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home.” “That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.” “Is it common?” “It’s not unusual.” Man goes into the doctor’s. “Doc, I’ve got a cricket ball stuck up my backside.” “How’s that?” “Don’t you start.”

bringing peace of mind

In April, Eden Valley Hospice & Jigsaw Children’s Hospice are holding a Make A Will Month which gives you the opportunity to make your Will with various local solicitors. You can receive a professionally written Will in return for a donation to Eden Valley Hospice and Jigsaw. This is your opportunity to secure your family’s future whilst helping to provide care to people with terminal and life limiting illnesses in our community.

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G

UA

RANT

E

E

Visit our new showroom... 1A Townfoot Industrial Estate, Brampton CA8 1SW 016977 42279 geltsdale-windows@live.com www.geltsdalewindows.co.uk The Doctor says to Paddy “You’ve got two weeks to live! Paddy says, “I’ll have one in May and the other in October”.

A

s part of our continued support of our patients and their families and the community we have identified a need to develop a way of helping people think about their future and get their affairs in order. With this in mind a group at the hospice have developed two new booklets which helps you think about the things that are important to you, such as advance care plans, making a Will and funeral planning. It is something we can all think about, the kind of future we want and by putting your affairs in order and making plans it can bring a peace of mind. Decisions can be changed but this is a starting point and will help start conversations with those closest to us to make sure our wishes are known. It can be difficult to plan care for the future but one way to stay in control is to make sure that the social care and medical attention you receive is informed and where possible, directed by you. There are various options to think about, Lasting Powers of Attorney, an Advanced Statement, and Advanced Decision to Refuse Treatment and an Emergency Health Care Plan, which can all be discussed with a healthcare professional. The funeral planning booklet is an ideal place for you to record your thoughts and wishes and to state exactly what you want. What will be a difficult time for your loved ones will be made easier if they know what arrangements you would have liked. By completing this booklet you will give yourself and the ones you care about most the satisfaction of knowing that they will be

People like to buy locally from businesses they know and trust

fulfilling your wishes wherever possible. Approximately 47% of people have not written a Will. Making a Will is easy to do and keeping it up to date is very important to ensure that your wishes are carried out and your loved ones are looked after. If you die without a Will your estate may not be distributed in the way you would have wished. Almost 70% of cohabiting couple have no Will. This means that on death, the surviving partner will have no automatic right to inherit the estate. 57% of parents have no Will at all and a further 31%, whilst they do have a Will have not named guardians who would take care of their children if they were no longer here. By taking part in the Eden Valley Hospice and Jigsaw Make a Will Month you can secure the future of your loved ones by receiving a professionally written will by a participating solicitor in exchange for an affordable donation to the Hospice. The care for 1 in 5 people at the Hospice is funded through a gift in will and we are very grateful to everyone who remembers Eden Valley Hospice and Jigsaw in this was. Last year over £600,000 was donated through Gifts in Will and every gift, however large or small, is vital to pay for the care of our patients. Make a Will Month runs throughout April and we are extremely grateful to the participating solicitors who are donating their time free of charge to Eden Valley Hospice and Jigsaw. For a list of solicitors taking part or a copy of the Getting Your Affairs in Order or Funeral Planning Booklets please call Karen Durden, Legacy Manager, on 01228 817607.

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LOCAL COMMUNITY

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The Artists, Alf Self, Val Lowe and Brian Powell showing their paintings.

ART for all Wetheral Spring Art Exhibition 2017

Tel: Scotby 01228 512536 Mobile: 07771 513 674 Email: mdwelton@hotmail.co.uk

Friday 28 April – Monday 1st May

Welcome to the Spring Art Exhibition at Wetheral Village Hall. Preview evening: Thursday 27th April at 6.30pm. Opener Dr Charles Hanson. Open daily thereafter 11-5pm with admission free and refreshments available.

T

his Art Exhibition is the show case of over twenty well known North Cumbrian Artists presenting a full range of art in all media and covering many different subjects, landscapes, portraits, animals, pets, wildlife and still life by talented artists. Young Artists are exhibiting paintings from the three Local Primary Schools and the Wetheral Play Group. This is the 13th Annual Art Exhibition, its founders being Ray Nichol, Geoff Driver and Brian Powell calling themselves in the

early days, “The Three Brushketeers”. Since that time more well known artists have joined making it one of the foremost art exhibitions in Cumbria. All the exhibits are for sale with the proceeds going to Wetheral Church projects. The raffle prize is a watercolour painting by Brian Powell, “Lake Shoreline”. Starting on Friday 28th April and all weekend there is a “Fairy Doors” trail starting at Wetheral Village Hall where trail forms can be collected for a £1 fee and where refreshments will be available.

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TRAVEL

A W O R L D C L A S S D E S T I N AT I O N

MADEIRA Madeira offers not only an all year round summer climate and wonderful fauna and flora - Madeira is also virtually crime free and one of the safest holiday destinations in the world. DAWSON & SANDERSON EXPLAINS MORE

M

ost people have heard of the Portuguese Island of Madeira, but not too many know exactly where it is. Located more than 600 miles southwest of Lisbon, and off the west coast of Morocco, it is a mere speck in the Atlantic Ocean. Funchal is the capital and the largest city on the island and home to just over 100,000 people. Funchal has many beautiful parks and gardens, including the Madeira Botanical Gardens, one of the most popular attractions in Funchal, which offer stunning views of the city as well as more than 2,000 plants. This is also the stopping point for the Funchal Cable Car. Madeira is famous for its lidos, or outdoor pools – you’ll find them at Funchal and Canico. Calheta, meanwhile, offers two man made golden sand beaches with stunning mountain views. Machico, the islands second largest town, has a new beach imported all the way from the Western Sahara. There are also many interesting activities and attractions that draw visitors to

Madeira, such as exploring the colourful old town, visiting one of the many museums or cathedrals, browsing some of the famous markets or taking an exhilarating 20 minute ride down the highway to Funchal from Monte in nothing but a wicker basket chair, steered by carreiros dressed in white and using their rubber soled shoes as brakes, in what is known as the Monte Toboggan run. Madeira’s favourite son, Cristiano Ronaldo, was recently honoured after the island’s airport was re-named after the Real Madrid star. Not content with his statue, wax work and underwear range, amongst many others, Ronaldo also recently opened his own personal 5* Boutique Hotel, CR7 in the island’s capital. However, I’m sure his ego is

likely to get even larger with the unveiling of Cristiano Ronaldo Airport. Funchal is also known for its excellent food and local Madeira wine, and foodies will have no trouble finding treats like fresh seafood to satisfy their appetites. To burn off those calories, there are plenty of active pursuits to enjoy in Funchal as well, including golf, scuba diving, paragliding, boat trips and the unforgettable Levada Walks. Funchal also has plenty of charming boutiques selling local handicrafts, as well as shopping malls. The local markets are great for picking up a few bargains and souvenirs. Madeira has a varied sub tropical climate, influenced by its geographical position and mountainous landscape, but generally the weather is pleasant all year round, with an average temperature of 67 degrees. The hottest months in Madeira are August and September, while January and February have the highest rainfall.

Dawson & Sanderson, 31 Lowther Street, Carlisle Tel: 01228 548 899 www.holidayco.co.uk We are proud to be an independent, Carlisle based, family run publication

Fact File

Language: Portuguese • Currency: Euro Time Difference: GMT • Cost of beer: From 1 euro 3 Course Meal: From 16euros Flight time: From 3.5 to 4.5hrs

Written by Stephen Dent www.village-link.co.uk

13


LOCAL CHARITY

MICROChipping

S

hould your dog or cat go missing - microchipping allows you and your pet to be reunited if your details are up-to-date on the microchip database. It is a good idea to supply several contact numbers to the database. If you are out looking for your pet, the company will not be able to contact you to say your dog or cat has been found if you have given incomplete details. You will often be supplied with a tag which should be fitted to your dog’s collar saying that your dog is chipped. Not only does this let people know they are chipped, it can also act as a theft deterrent. Animal Charities receive numerous calls from distressed owners trying to find their pet but have not microchipped it or details are not kept up-to-date. It is heart breaking to know that animals may not successfully be reunited

For you. For business. For life.

Whatever is happening in your life, we have the help, advice and support you need.

with their owners because they have not been microchipped. Dogs legally must be microchipped with up-to-date registered details on a recognised database. It is also a good idea to microchip your cats and other pets e.g. rabbits and ferrets (please talk to your vet for advice). For further information about microchipping please contact your vet or call Oak Tree Animals’ Charity on 01228 560082. www.oaktreeanimals.org.uk

Cut out this voucher and bring it with you to receive a 10% discount off Lasting Powers of Attorney (Property & Financial AND Health & Wealth) Valid until 30th April 2017.

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Tel: 01228 593939 www.butterworths-solicitors.co.uk

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Driveways Garden Furniture Patios

Shop Signage Car Parks Walls

Call Ian for a free quote on

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www.carlislepressurewashing.co.uk Paddy phones an ambulance because his mate has just fallen off a roof while trying to climb down a chimney. Operator: ‘What is your location sir?’ Paddy: ‘Outside number 28 Eucalyptus Boulevard...’ Operator: ‘How do you spell that sir?’ Silence... (heavy breathing), and after a minute Operator: ‘Are you there sir?’ More heavy breathing and another minute later Operator: ‘Sir, can you hear me?’ This goes on for another few minutes until... Operator: Sir, please answer me. Can you still hear me?’ Paddy: ‘Yes, sorry about dat...I couldn’t spell Eucalyptus Boulevard, so I just dragged him round to number 3 Elm Street...’;

14

To advertise in Village Link call Andrew now on 01228 562904 or sales@village-link.co.uk


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HOW SMART Are you (Answers on page 22)

First Question: You are a participant in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in? Second Question: If you overtake the last person, then you are ...? Third Question? This must be done in your head only. Do not use paper and pencil or a calculator. Try it. Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. Now add 10. What is the total? Fourth Question: Mary’s father has five daughters: 1. NANA 2. NENE 3. NINI 4. NONO, and ????. What is the name of the fifth daughter?

70’s POP music Quiz

1. The Filth and the Fury! screamed the headlines of The Daily Mirror in December 1976, about which group? 2. Bridge Over Troubled Water was a 1970 hit for who? 3. Norman Greenbaum, a nice jewish boy, who by his own admission did not believe in Jesus, wrote which hit song? 4. Which group supported Smokey Robinson on The Tears of a Clown? 5. Sounding like a scrap merchant, who sang In The Summertime? 6. What was Jimi Hendrixs first UK number 1 hit of the 70s? 7. Which song of the 70s was inspired by schoolgirl Brenda Spencer indiscriminately shooting and killing several children in a school playground? 8. Which physician sang When You’re In Love With a Beautiful Woman? 9. In which year did The Police have a UK number 1 hit with Message In A Bottle? 10. Which 1979 double album featured the artwork of political cartoonist Gerald Scarfe? 11. How many number 1 hits did the Police score in the 1970s? 12. Which 1979 song from Art Garfunkel featured in the animated movie Watership Down? 13. Who had a Heart of Glass in 1979? 14. In which year did the Village People have a huge hit with Y.M.C.A? 15. Who sang “Once, twice, three times a lady”? 16. Which actor better known as a television cop had a UK number 1 hit in 19 October 1977? 17. Of which song was it said that “Three and a half minutes of melodramatic caterwauling is always better than 300 pages of melodramatic prose”? 18. Who sang The Mull of Kintyre in 1977? 19. Which gravelly voiced artist had a hit with The First Cut is the Deepest in May 1977? 20. Which narcisistic pop midget had a 1977 hit with When I Need You?

What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall? “Dam!” What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids Every issue is available online and free to read

www.village-link.co.uk

15


LOCAL BUSINESS

WATER OF LIFE –

GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH?

W

Whisky, Specialist Gin & Craft Beer

hat is water of life? Well put simply; it is whisky! For thousands of years we have been enjoying the most elegant and flavoursome drink on the planet, though it wasn’t made for drinking at first - but you would have to attend our tasting evenings to find out why. And yes, there is a taste and flavour of whisky that is for YOU! Not all whisky tastes like smoke and peat, they can taste of crème brûlée, fruit cake or Terry’s chocolate orange - naturally! Alcohol is generally regarded as something bad for you, which could potentially damage your liver, impact your lifestyle, and result in a number of un-savory outcomes. When it is not

NEW

TRADE ! COUNTER G SOON

N OPENI

respected and consumed in excess, that is completely true. How can alcohol be good for our health? We have been told wine is good for you - and it was, but not so much any more. Years ago, wine was just a natural product from the vine, but as with all food now - it’s not that simple anymore. Why is whisky different? Well the great thing about whisky - especially Scotch whisky is that it under VERY strict rules and regulations to meet the Scotch Malt Whisky association guidelines, there are many rules - and breaking them incurs hefty fines and immediate removal of product from sale. What is in whisky that’s good for us? Well I am not going to tell you that whisky is full of essential vitamins that your body needs, because whisky is nothing but barley, spring water and yeast matured naturally in all sorts of different woods. But whisky is extremely low in saturated fat, cholesterol, and sodium and it also has a very low level of carbohydrates. In terms of its organic compounds, whisky is rich in ellagic acid, which is a very powerful

antioxidant, and is responsible for a great deal of the health benefits. Lets look at some of the benefits: Whisky supports healthy brain function, helps avoid weight gain, supports heart health, fights early dementia, helps avoid blood clots, fights cancer, gives immune system boost, reduces risk of stroke, lowers stress, diabetes control, length of life - PHEW, is this really true? Well don’t believe me, I am just a whisky specialist - I would tell you that! Ask your doctor, do your own research, try it for yourself. Have you heard 110 year old women reveal their secret for length of life? Usually it is ‘A whisky a day’. Although these health benefits sound wonderful, there is also a dangerous side to drinking whisky. Alcoholism and binge drinking are both detrimental to your overall health, and can undo any possible good things that moderate amounts of whiskey can impart. And keep the quality high, the benefits will be reduced on young or cheap whisky, be careful with supermarket whisky they can have additives and caramel colouring - nasty! Come and see us at our new shop on Crosby Street, Carlisle, we are here to help. We want to be a part of making Cumbria healthy, but still enjoy life to the full.

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lakeland

Adventures F

Fellwalking enthusiast Stephen Robson reflects on a labour of love which took forty years to achieve – completing all 214 Wainwright Fells.

or many years I walked alone in a manner somewhat reminiscent of Mr Wainwright, the guide book writer. I was possibly a little friendlier to those I met along the way but I nonetheless enjoyed being up there alone, drinking in all there was to savour and preferring not to be compromised in any respect; destination, distance, time taken, ground covered...lost in my own thoughts and not particularly craving company. As I grew older something changed within me. Perhaps it was the threat of accident or even collapse whilst climbing solo, but I have latterly seemed to attract a raggle - taggle army of folk to accompany me on my travels.I am aware that in describing these people I run the possibility of comparison with some boring person showing off albums of baby photographs, or his last ten years of holiday snaps, but here goes.... Pride of place must probably go to Nick and Julian...not forgetting Star, Julian’s dog, our trusty companion and guide. I am ten years older than Julian and six years Nicks senior, causing Nick to comment in a recent letter “if only I could look as good as you when I’m your age”, a back handed compliment, if ever there was one! Often they end up holding gates open for me as I stagger down. “Come on old boy!” they chide. “I’ll old boy you! “ I retort. Nick completed the Wainwright’s first, then myself, then Julian. They are great companions in the mountains, good humoured and not adverse to the occasional sarcastic comment. In fact Julian gives Father Jessup, the scathing priest in Father Ted a run for his money. I love them both dearly. My brother Dave has accompanied me on quite a few walks. He is eight years older than me. Slowing up in terms of personal fitness a little as the years pass. I recall being on the breast route on Great Gable many years ago with the light behind him and thinking to myself “oh my goodness, he’s going

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bald!”.... that came to pass... and now it’s my turn! Then there’s Mike, who lost his wife to cancer a year or so ago and now feels more than ever the importance of maximising on every moment in the hills. Caroline and Claire who accompanied me to the summit of Scafell Pike for charity this summer... My niece Helen, a country lover, very “hello earth, hello sky”, at one with nature. Good talker, too. Julian’s buddy Mark, who for years I believed didn’t exist. I thought he was his imaginary pal!.. Who else? Ah yes, Bill. Very stoic, stiff jointed, always looking forward to a pint in the pub afterwards. In fact it’s a job getting him out of there! The common denominator with all these good folk is that they are all perfectly in tune with me, in their appreciation of the wonderful scenery of the Lake District. My son Barnaby, is just about to turn twenty one. He is not driven by aesthetics and prefers to“beast” the mountains. He’d literally pushed me towards the summit of Red Screes, some four years ago. “Hey, can I remind you that my dad was dead at this point?” (my father had passed on at the age of fifty four after his third heart attack). “You’re half dead already!” was Barnaby’s response. He loves witty banter. “No man is an island...” he opined recently, glancing at the top of my head. “..but your hair is fast becoming one!” Nothing like a comment from your children to bring you down to earth with a thud! www.village-link.co.uk

17


LOCAL BUSINESS

taking THE PLUNGE THE TRANSITION FROM ‘WORKING FROM YOUR LIVING ROOM’ TO A USED CAR FORECOURT HAS BEEN HARD FOUGHT. WE SPEAK TO Chris smalley (Usedcars4less) about starting up HIS ‘USED CAR’ business

A

fter working for main car dealers since 2000, I decided to start my own ‘used car’ business in March 2015, predominately so I could spend more time with my beautiful daughter and family. Getting started was hard. I traded from home initially, with a rented storage unit 15 minutes away. We struggled at first, only selling 3 cars in March and 5 in April. Business picked up in April and we started to reduce the amount of money we were losing. The initial months were scary, and I’m sure this would put many off the idea of starting up their own business; but I do believe the pain and stress is worth it during these six months to a year in order to get the business off the ground. My previous job experience in Mercedes-Benz, BMW MINI, Hyundai and Lexus had given me a good understanding of the trade, and more importantly, I have seen first hand the benefits that come from offering customers great service. We soon expanded the business to a forecourt and office near Longtown, which has been a big help logistically. We still operate predominantly ‘by appointment’, as our location is remote, but it’s a nice sight to meet for a coffee and a chat. We are now selling between 20 and 30 cars a month, we currently have 3 employees. We use all social media platforms with our Facebook page being the most successful - our page grew from 0 - 3936 ‘likes’ in the first 12 months. Why buy from Usedcars4less? Our service and attention to detail is as good as any main dealer. We have very low monthly overheads which means we keep our prices as low as possible –

18

regularly price checking cars within a 100 mile radius I hand pick all vehicles myself, which are then safety checked, MOT’d and warrantied for 6 months – and that’s all included in the advertised price. Uniquely, I also valet all the vehicles here on site and drive them, so when you enquire about a car it’s a very ‘complete experience’ - I don’t need to ask anyone else how the car drives, when it was MOT’d, what the history is etc, I know the answers because I have done the same buying process as a customer. We offer part exchange options and we also offer financial services through Close Brothers Motor Finance, who we have built an excellent relationship with. In return, we can offer low rate finance to our customers. My advice to anyone thinking of starting a new business is be bold enough to give it a go, and look beyond the initial six month to a year scary startup period. It will be tough but for me, it has definitely all been worth it. I genuinely love the motor trade. I have built a brilliant database of customers who are more like friends than numbers on a spread sheet. And this gives me the opportunity to say ‘thanks’ to all my lovely customers who swopped the ‘glitzy-car-showroomsuit-wearing-salesman-with-flashy-watch’ experience to dealing with a more ‘farmer chic’ fella offering a humble cuppa and a hobnob.

Carlisle

Colour Run The hospice’s kaleidoscopic day of fundraising will return to Carlisle Racecourse for the third times in 2017. Bigger and better than ever before! Date: Sunday 14 May 2017 Start Time: 13:00:00 Location: Carlisle Racecourse, Durdar Road, Carlisle, CA2 4TS “I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle”. Winston Churchill

Bob stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity. He waggled, looked up, looked down, waggled again, but didn’t start his back swing. Finally, his exasperated partner said, “What the dickins is taking so long?” “My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse,” Bob explained. “I want to make a perfect shot.” “Good lord!” his companion exclaimed. “You don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of hitting her from here!”.

To advertise in Village Link call Andrew now on 01228 562904 or sales@village-link.co.uk


LOCAL BUSINESS

CEL

EBR

2017 – YEAR OF THE

RUMBLING TUMMY

ATIN

G

YEA

RS

Written by Champion Cyclist and Pilates Instructor, Carol Westmorland

R

eading that the body fights to return to its perceived ‘normal’ weight with an alarming accuracy, got me thinking. There needs to be another approach to this trial to error. I believe I may have come up with the perfect idea and, really, it is very simple. Requires no special foodstuffs. No special timing and, best of all, it is free.

It takes an empty tummy around two hours before it starts to rumble. It is discipline that is needed, and a little bit of misery - of the kindest kind. I believe a bit of self-discipline is always a good thing. We should find something to be disciplined about even if we do not need to be disciplined. Confused? Maybe. I will go on. Remove a habit from your life for a time and manage without it. Show restraint. It makes you feel good and in control. Without restraint and control we have no boundaries. Learn how it feels to be denied. Learn how it feels to hold back and, this may be difficult to digest initially, learn how it feels to feel hungry. Can you remember the last time you felt hungry? Not habitual hunger but actual hunger - habitual hunger being routine. When did you last feel your tummy rumble? It takes an empty tummy (I am sticking to my theme) around two hours before it starts to rumble. Rumbling stimulates the appetite. Our tummies should rumble every day; really loudly. We should be proud of our rumbling tummies. It says that we have not over-stuffed ourselves to the point of no return. A full tummy will perhaps rumble, but very quietly. Too much in it to make any audible noise - we need space in our tummies for rumbling. I think a rumbling tummy is charming. It sends a clear message that you are not fit to pop. So, as we are well into 2017, let it be The Year of the Rumbling Tummy. There are worse things, and it may be the start of something big - or not, as the case should be. T: 01768 896733 | M: 07976 266335 Email: carol@pilates-cumbria.co.uk www.pilates-cumbria.uk We are committed to successfully promoting your business or venture

www.village-link.co.uk

19


CROSSWORD

Crossword

ACROSS

1 Composer from Harlem originally (6) 4 The morning after, head of government is seen in German city (8) 9 One makes tolls double (6) 10 Secret surrounding the French bedspread (8) 11 27 Across could be empty (6) 12 Put order out for project (8) 13 Coal-carrier is somewhat methodical (3) 14 A female just for romantic intrigue (6) 17 Study excursion in outline (7) 21 Little fellow swallows drug to show complete DNA sequence (6) 25 Oddly, Gladys is happy (3) 26 Envoy says emir must reform (8) 27 Tom takes Eva back with a warning (6) 28 He is included in plan finally (2,3,3) 29 Spot the woman with an instrument (6) 30 Writer who looks after the trees? (8) 31 Slept soundly (6)

For the answers to this crossword, email: editor@village-link.co.uk Some cause happiness whereever they go; others whenever they go. (Oscar Wilde) A Yorkshireman and his wife walked past a swanky new restaurant last night ... “Did you smell that food?” she asked .. “Wonderful!”. Being the ‘kind hearted yorkshireman’, he thought, “What the heck, I’ll treat her!”...So they walked past it again.

Crossword No XC251810

DOWN

1 Five in Romania cavorting with a Czech (8) 2 Help copper with two fellows to prevent their escape? (8) 3 Currently operational? (8) 5 On ship in foreign parts moving down river (6) 6 Get hot wandering around ethnic area (6) 7 Material that can be made into louvres mostly (6) 8 More willingly desert hero when love’s lost (6) 12 Show parrot off at start of year (7) 15 Steal from some subordinates on return (3) 16 Computer problem is a virus perhaps (3) 18 Telling story for daughter maybe (8) 19 At the same time, what a male admirer wants? (8) 20 Signed guest out, looking embarrassed (8) 22 Outstanding artwork provides comfort (6) 23 This chap is the winner (6) 24 Property of Treasury chiefly guarded by fools (6) 25 Country house offers good variety (6)

Sudoku

DOWN

Medium Puzzle 2,872,486,554

2

4

6

5

Medium Puzzle 5,160,005,108

8

8

7

1

4

r from Harlem originally (6) 1 Five in Romania 5 9cavorting 2 with a 7Czech 5 6 ning after, head of government is (8) 7 3 9 8 5 erman city (8) 2 Help copper with two to prevent 9 7 fellows 5 6 3 9 5 How To Play: The object of the game is to fill all squares 8 7 1 9 7 8 es tolls double (6) their escape? (8) in the grid with the correct number. 7 6 2 1 6 5 3 rrounding the 3 Currently operational? (8) TheFrench rules are: bedspread 8 6 2 Every row, column and box must contain all the digits 1 to 9. 5 On ship8 in foreign4 parts moving down river Each number can only appear once in every row, column or 2 6 8 2 1 6 s could be empty (6)puzzle has only one correct solution! (6) box. Every 9 7 3 6 6 1 7 3 out for project (8) 6 Get hot4 wandering around ethnic area (6) ier is somewhat methodical (3) 7 Material that can be made into louvres just for romantic intrigue (6) mostly (6) cursion in outline (7) 8 More willingly desert hero when love’s lost ow swallows drug to show (6) DNA sequence (6) 12 Show parrot off at start of year (7) ladys is happy (3) 15 Steal from some subordinates on return (3) ys emir must reform (8) 16 Computer problem is a virus perhaps (3) es Eva back with a warning (6) 18 Telling story for daughter maybe (8) luded in plan finally (2,3,3) 19 At the same time, what a male admirer woman with an instrument (6) wants? (8) ho looks after the trees? (8) 20 Signed guest out, looking embarrassed (8) ndly (6) 20 22in Village Outstanding artwork provides comfort (6) To advertise Link call Andrew now on 01228 562904 or sales@village-link.co.uk 23 This chap is the winner (6) 24 Property of Treasury chiefly guarded by Back to puzzle

Print another...

© Web Sudoku 2017 ­ www.websudoku.com

Back to puzzle

Print another...

© Web Sudoku 2017 ­ www.websudoku.com


KIDS COMPETITION

where’s

Bear? ear is a keen rambler but with a poor sense of direction (stuffing for brains!) and has got lost again in Carlisle. However, he has his phone with him and has sent this photo of what he can see.

B

WIN

£25

Nursery School

Do you know

where bear

is?

If you do, then go and rescue him before anyone else does! When he is safely at your home, get your mum or dad to email us at bear@village-link.co.uk, leaving your name and address and bear’s dad will be round to pick him up and hand over your cash reward.

Last Issue’s Winner Well done to Tabitha who found bear in Rickerby and received her £25 reward.

10) Tabitha (aged Remember: Leave it a week before you go looking for bear. All the deliveries must be finished to keep it fair.

Exclusive to Carlisle by local Carlisle people

www.village-link.co.uk

21


LOCAL BUSINESS DIREcTORY Answers to How Smart are You - from page 15 Question One. If you answered that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are in second place! Question Two: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are ... wrong again! Tell me sunshine, how can you overtake the last person?? You’re not very good at this are you? Question Three: Did you get 5000? Wrong! The correct answer is 4100. Question Four: Did you answer Nunu? No! Of course it isn’t .. her name is Mary.

C L E A NI NG S E R V I CE S

Edna & Rona

ld

Edna: I’m not over impressed with these new energy saving light bulbs. Ronald: Why’s that my dear? Edna: You’ve still got to get up and switch them on.

My wife came in last night and said “I have some good news and some bad news about the car”. I asked her, “What is the good news?” She replied. “The air bag works”. Answers to 70’s Pop Music Quiz - page 15

1. The Sex Pistols following their infamous television interview. 2. Simon & Garfunkel 3. Spirit In The Sky 4. The Miracles 5. Mungo Jerry 6. Voodoo Chile 7. I Don’t Like Mondays by The Boomtown Rats. When asked why she had done it, Spencer said simply “I don’t like Mondays” 8. Dr Hook 9. 1979 10. The Wall (Pink Floyd) 11. 2 (Message in a Bottle and Walking On The Moon) 12. Bright Eyes 13. Blondie 14. 1979 15. The Commodores 16. David Soul (singing Silver Lady) 17. Wuthering Heights by Kate Bush 18. Wings 19. Rod Stewart 20. Leo Sayer GARD EN SER V I CE S

CA R P E T CL E ANI NG

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Phone Bernard 01228 535989 Noddy Holder is going back on tour with his band Slade. He calls at a 70’s style clothes shop in Birmingham to get his stage costume together. “So what do you need?” asks the sales assistant. “A pair of platform boots, a pair of flared trousers, a big glittery hat, and a frilly shirt with a big collar”. replies Noddy. “Kipper Tie? asks the assistant. “That’s very kind,” says Noddy. “Milk and two sugars”.

22

FAST • LOCAL • RELIABLE CA R VA L E TI NG

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Don’t forgetgetoLink mention Vilinlag to adverts w hen respond

LOCAL BUSINESS DIREcTORY

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PR O PE R TY SE R V I CE S ALL WORK GUARANTEED FREE ESTIMATES • AVAILABLE 24/7

carleton paving & groundworks

• Driveways • Foundations, Drainage & Floors • Fencing, Turf & Patios • Walls & Brickwork • VAT Free Telephone NICK now on

PAI NTE R / D E CO RATOR

A family run kitchen and bedroom manufacturing company Unit 9, Kingmoor Rd, Carlisle

Buy direct from the Manufacturer

Tel: 01228 590003

07787 558 211

www.southwellsuk.com

ELE CT R I C AL SER VIC ES

PAY R O L L S E R V I CE S

Specialising in Chimney repairs, pointing & capping

All Carpentry Work, Doors & UPVC, Floors, Dry Rot, Timber Treatment, Glazing, Painting, All Roofing & Pointing, Flat Roofs All Plumbing Repairs, Leaking Taps, Fitted Bathrooms, Fitted Kitchens, Radiators, Guttering Repaired & Renewed, UPVC Fascias & Soffits, Fencing & Shed Erection

07799 386054 Office: 01228 598578

Mobile:

email: micknolan65@yahoo.co.uk

Fully qualified and time served Painter & Decorator, with over 22 years of experience

Insurance work carried out Business and Residential work undertaken

Please contact me for a FREE quotation

Contact Phillip on 01228 524602 or Mobile: 07712 549032

Email: pwills326@hotmail.com

W I ND O W CLE AN IN G

JP Payrolls Ltd Payroll services Jill Hetherington you can depend on 17 Faustin Hill

Your local electrician for all your domestic wiring needs: New fuse boards, extra sockets, security alarms, lighting and inspection and testing. 17th Edition C&G qualified, Part P registered.

Tel: 07514 489377 darrenculley@btinternet.com FI NANC IAL AD VIC E

JPC

Financial Management

3 Retirement Planning 3 Inheritance Tax Planning 3 Investments 3 Life/ Critical illness cover We also specialise in

T: 01228 564074 M: 0754 980 9444 E: jill@jp-payrolls.co.uk W: www.jp-payrolls.co.uk

Plains Road Wetheral CA4 8JZ

• Efficient and friendly • Competitive prices • Compatible with pensions • From one employee upwards • No obligation quotes • No hidden fees T: 01228 564074 M: 0754 980 9444 E: jill@jp-payrolls.co.uk W: www.jp-payrolls.co.uk

MOBILE HAIRDRESSER

Charlotte’s Mobile Hairdressing

Charlotte McAvoy Hairdresser 07495 457 344

www.cumbria-window-cleaner.com Other services include:

What !

It only costs £40 to advertise in this directory? FUNE R AL SE R V I CE S

• Gutter clearing • Fascia,Soffit and all other UPVC cleaning • Conservatory roof cleaning Call Garry now for a free no obligation quote

01228 593958 07929 525648 KE Y CUTTI N G

Not everyone wants the traditional send-off...

Local & Independent services with loads of FREE PARKING for your convenience

Jonathan Connell BA HONS

Car keys & Remote’s • Key Cutting Shoe Repair • Dry Cleaning Engraving • Sharpening Watch repairs

Independent Financial Adviser Mobile: 07503 743174 Email: jpcfinancial@gmail.com

Currys PC World Car Park, Kingstown, Carlisle

Self Invested pensions for commercial/ business property purchase For a free initial consultation contact:

JPC Financial Management Ltd is an appointed representative of InvestAcc Ltd which is authorised and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority. Company Number: 07972189 Registered in England and Wales. Reg. Office: Cairnville, Heads Nook, Brampton, CA8 9AA

charlottesmobilehairdressing

Charlottemcavoy01@gmail.com

Excellent value for money with high exposure

www.keyishoes.co.uk Call Simon on: 07808 793418

www.village-link.co.uk

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