Washington City Paper (January 29, 2016)

CITYPAPER Washington

food: the $100 cocktail 19

photos: blizzard of 2016 7

Free Volume 36, no. 5 WashingtonCityPaPer.Com January 29–February 4, 2016

Should the diStrict...

CREATE CANNABIS CLUBS?

Build AN NFl StAdiuM At rFK?

RAISE THE MINIMUM WAGE?

ANd Much, Much More! 12

2 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

INSIDE

12 the D.C. poll What District voters think about a football stadium in D.C., a higher minimum wage, and more

4 Chatter

City list

DistriCt line

33 City Lights: Cameron Esposito brings her nuanced, observational comedy to the Kennedy Center.

33 Music 38 Dance 38 Theater 41 Film

7

Our Tale of Snow: How the District responded to the Blizzard of 2016 9 Unobstructed View 10 Savage Love 11 Gear Prudence 17 Buy D.C.

D.C. FeeD

19 Expensive Tastes: Why you shouldn’t hate the $100 cocktail 21 Grazer: Hope you like chicken!

21 Underserved: Roofers Union’s Screw You, Rusty

arts

25 Film Opener: Gittell on the Oscar-nominated Live Action and Animated short films 28 Arts Desk: Charting D.C.’s cultural vitality in Rank & Groove 30 Sketches: Capps on Colby Caldwell’s “how to survive your own death”

42 ClassiFieDs Diversions 43 Crossword

“

You just literallY killed something just to kill it. —Page 19

”

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 3

CHATTER Answers to No One

In which readers get into the vigilante spirit over something pretty lame

DArrOw MONtgOMery

ReadeR Response to our annual An-

swers Issue (Jan. 22) brought out the tattletale in some readers: Va resident wanted to know “RE taxis w two plates, if I see DC taxis w only DC plates parked in VA who should I report them to to make sure they are paying the correct fees?” But Mari was having none of that shit: “VA resident, get over yourself. Maybe they are a district resident that comes to sleep with their girlfriend at night. Go find a hobby.” What if this is a hobby, like trainspotting? Maybe we shouldn’t be so quick to judge.

Just kidding! This is nonsense, don’t go around checking up who’s paying their fees. Finally, reader Rich, who sounds like a profoundly unpleasant person but he reads our paper so I guess we like him well enough, wrote: “The inferiority complex: There’s an aspect of DC that makes it easy to dismiss it as Columbus Ohio (or worse, Indianapolis) with better monuments. The city and its folks gets boosterish about ridiculous things. People try to connect Langston Hughes to DC because he lived here briefly--his work is connected to Harlem and, to a lesser extent, Cleveland and he was born somewhere further West. DC also is basically a musical footnote, but we’ll never hear the end of its brief contribution to Punk and it’s small part in Funk. DC is more of a real city than it was 20 years ago, when the second string border town was more obvious. But DC and DCers have such inflated ideas about themselves that they have to transfer it to the place, and do it w/o a sense of humor. I knew a lot of DCers before I came here and I always found them to be pretty annoying. I got on well with NYers, Bostonians, but DCers were just so smug an d humorless and usually less knowledgable than they thought about the world.”

Rich, if the only difference you can genuinely perceive between D.C. and Columbus is some monuments, you truly don’t get this city at all. Move to Ohio, you’ll save a —Emily Q. Hazzard bunch of money.

Want to see your name in bold on this page? Send letters, gripes, clarifications, or praise to editor@washingtoncitypaper.com.

3200 BLOCK OF MT. PLEASANT NW, JAN. 22

PuBLiSHER EMERiTuS: Amy AustIn iNTERiM PuBLiSHER: ErIc norwood EdiTOR: stEVE cAVEndIsH MANAgiNg EdiTORS: EmIly q. HAzzArd, sArAH AnnE HugHEs ARTS EdiTOR: mAtt coHEn FOOd EdiTOR: jEssIcA sIdmAn CiTy LigHTS EdiTOR: cArolInE jonEs STAFF WRiTERS: AndrEw gIAmbronE, wIll sommEr STAFF PHOTOgRAPHER: dArrow montgomEry ONLiNE dEVELOPER: zAcH rAusnItz CREATiVE diRECTOR: jAndos rotHstEIn ART diRECTOR: lAurEn HEnEgHAn CONTRiBuTiNg WRiTERS: jEffrEy AndErson, jonEttA rosE bArrAs, morgAn bAskIn, ErIcA brucE, sopHIA busHong, krIston cApps, rIlEy crogHAn, jEffry cudlIn, ErIn dEVInE, mAtt dunn, tIm EbnEr, noAH gIttEll, ElEnA goukAssIAn, trEy grAHAm, lAurA HAyEs, louIs jAcobson, AmrItA kHAlId, stEVE kIVIAt, cHrIs klImEk, joHn krIzEl, jEromE lAngston, cHrIstInE mAcdonAld, nEVIn mArtEll mAEVE mcdErmott, trAVIs mItcHEll, mArcus j. moorE, justIn moyEr, trIcIA olszEwskI, EVE ottEnbErg, mIkE pAArlbErg, sofIA rEsnIck, rEbEccA j. rItzEl, bEtH sHook, jordAn-mArIE smItH, mAtt tErl, tAmmy tuck, nAtAlIE VIllAcortA, kAArIn VEmbAr, jonEllE wAlkEr, EmIly wAlz, joE wArmInsky, mIcHAEl j. wEst, brAndon wu iNTERNS: AllIson kowAlskI, quInn myErs diRECTOR OF AudiENCE dEVELOPMENT: sArA dIck SALES MANAgER: mElAnIE bAbb SENiOR ACCOuNT ExECuTiVES: joE HIcklIng, ArlEnE kAmInsky, AlIcIA mErrItt ACCOuNT ExECuTiVES: stu kElly, cHrIsty sIttEr, cHAd VAlE SALES OPERATiONS MANAgER: HEAtHEr mcAndrEws diRECTOR OF MARKETiNg ANd EVENTS: cHloE fEdynA BuSiNESS dEVELOPMENT ASSOCiATE: EdgArd IzAguIrrE OPERATiONS diRECTOR: jEff boswEll SENiOR SALES OPERATiON ANd PROduCTiON COORdiNATOR: jAnE mArtInAcHE SOuTHCOMM: CHiEF ExECuTiVE OFFiCER: cHrIs fErrEll CHiEF FiNANCiAL OFFiCER: Ed tEArmAn CHiEF OPERATiNg OFFiCER: blAIr joHnson ExECuTiVE ViCE PRESidENT: mArk bArtEl LOCAL AdVERTiSiNg: (202) 332-2100 FAx: (202) 618-3959, Ads@wAsHIngtoncItypApEr.com VOL. 36, NO. 5, JAN. 29–FEB. 4, 2016 wAsHIngton cIty pApEr Is publIsHEd EVEry wEEk And Is locAtEd At 1400 EyE st. nw, suItE 900, wAsHIngton, d.c. 20005. cAlEndAr submIssIons ArE wElcomEd; tHEy must bE rEcEIVEd 10 dAys bEforE publIcAtIon. u.s. subscrIptIons ArE AVAIlAblE for $250 pEr yEAr. IssuE wIll ArrIVE sEVErAl dAys AftEr publIcAtIon. bAck IssuEs of tHE pAst fIVE wEEks ArE AVAIlAblE At tHE offIcE for $1 ($5 for oldEr IssuEs). bAck IssuEs ArE AVAIlAblE by mAIl for $5. mAkE cHEcks pAyAblE to wAsHIngton cIty pApEr or cAll for morE optIons. © 2016 All rIgHts rEsErVEd. no pArt of tHIs publIcAtIon mAy bE rEproducEd wItHout tHE wrIttEn pErmIssIon of tHE EdItor.

4 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

Food & Drink Best Alcoholic Punch Best Asian Restaurant Best Bagel Best Bakery Best Bar Best Bar with Games Best BBQ Best Beer Festival Best Bloody Mary Best Boozy Milkshake Best Brunch Best Burger Best Chef Best Chinese Best Cocktail Bar Best Coffee Shop Best Crabcake Best Craft Beer Selection Best Cupcake Best Distillery Best Dive Bar Best Doughnuts Best Downtown Lunch Best Ethiopian Restaurant Best Falafal Best Fast Casual Dining Best Food Blog Best Food Truck Best Fried Chicken Best Gay Bar/Club Best Gelato Best Gluten-Free Menu Best Hangover Breakfast Best Happy Hour Best Ice Cream Shop Best Indian Restaurant Best Irish Pub Best Italian Restaurant Best Japanese Best Kabob Best Kid-Friendly Restaurant Best Korean Best Late Night Eats Best Latin American Restaurant Best Local Brewery Best Brew Pub Best Macaron Best Margarita Best Middle Eastern Restaurant

Best Mixologist Best Modern American Restaurant Best Mussels Best Neighborhood Bar Best New Bar Best New Restaurant Best Pho Best Pie Best Pizza Best Place to Have Dinner with Live Music Best Restaurant Best Restaurant When Someone Else Pays Best Restaurant When You Pay Best Restaurant with a View Best Restaurant with Delivery Best Rooftop Bar Best Sandwich Best Seafood Best Singles Bar Best Slice of Pizza Best Small Plates Best Soul Food Best Spice Shop Best Sports Bar Best Steak House Best Tater Tots Best Thai Restaurant Best Trivia Bar Best Vegan/Vegetarian Restaurant Best Vietnamese Best Wine Bar Best Wine List Best Wings Best Whiskey Selection Best Yogurt/Smoothie

Arts & Entertainment Best Art Class Best Art Gallery Best Arts and Culture Non-Profit Best Arts Blog Best Arts Festival Best Comedy Venue Best Commercial Art Gallery Best Cultural Festival

Dear Readers of Washington City Paper:

Best Photography Services

Best Drag King

Best Pilates Studio

We care what you think. Really, we do. We ask you again

Best Elementary School

Best Place to Buy a Car

for your favorite haunts, your favorite bartender, your

Best Place to Buy Beer

Best Place to Buy a Suit

Best Embassy Event Best Graduate Program

favorite vegetarian joint, your fa-

Best Place to Buy Candy

Best High School

Best Place to Buy Eyeglasses

Best Hotel

vorite bike shop, and, of course,

Best Place to Buy Fur Handcuffs

Best House of Worship

best local band. Let’s celebrate

Best Place to Buy Home Furnishings

D.C. Let’s define what we love most about living here. Let’s Vote.

Best DJ Best Festival Best Film Festival Best Go-Go Band Best Hip-Hop Night Best Jazz Jam Session Best Jazz/Blues Venue Best Karaoke Best Local Cover Band Best Local Original Band Best Local Hip-Hop Artist Best Movie Theater Best Museum off the Mall Best Museum on the Mall Best Music Festival Best Music Venue Best Neighborhood Festival Best Night Club Best Outdoor Movie Series Best Outdoor Venue Best Performance Artist Best Performing Arts Venue Best Place to See Local Music Best Radio Station Best Recording Studio Best Recreational Sports League Best Singer Best Strip Club Best Theater Company Best Theater Festival Best Visual Artist

Goods & Services Best Alcohol Delivery

Best Architecture Firm Best Arts & Crafts Supply Store Best Running Store Best Bank/ Credit Union Best Barre Studio Best Bike Shop Best Book Store Best Bus to New York Best Cable Provider Best Car Share Service Best Carpet Cleaners Best Cell Phone Provider Best Child Care Best Children’s Clothing Store Best Clothing Boutique Best Consignment Shop Best Contractor Best Crossfit Gym Best Dance Class Best Dentist Best Doctor Best Dog Walk Service Best Doggie Daycare Best Dry Cleaner Best Event Venue Best Eye Doctor Best Facial Best Farmers Market Best Flea Market Best Flower Shop Best Food Market Best Food Delivery Service Best Garden Store Best Green Business Best Grocer

Best Life Coach

Best Place to Buy Jewelry

Best Local Sports Player

Best Place to Buy Vinyl

Best Gym Best Hair Salon Best Hair Stylist Best Handmade Accessories Best Handmade Clothing Best Handmade EcoFriendly Products Best Handmade Home Decor

Account

Best Place to Buy Instruments

Best Place to Buy Wine Best Dance Company

Best Local Instagram

Best Local Crafter Best Local Sports Team

Best Place to Get a Tan

Best Middle School

Best Place to Get Waxed

Best Mixed-Use

Best Place to Get Your Bike Fixed

Development

Best Place to Get Your Car Serviced

To Go Out In

Best Place to Get Your Cracked Phone Screen Fixed

To Live In

Best Plastic Surgeon

Best Neighborhood Best Neighborhood Best New Condos Best News Anchor

Best Handmade Products for Kids

Best Plumber

Best Handyman

Best Real Estate Group

Best Hardware Store

Best Ride Share

Best Place to Find a

Best Home Goods Store

Best Roofers

One-Night Stand

Best Hospital

Best Shoe Repair

Best Place to Take an

Best Indoor Cycling Studio

Best Shoe Store

Out-of-Towner

Best Lawyer

Best Spa

Best Lifestyle Blog

Best Place to Take

Best Specialty Food Store

Best Liquor Store

a Tinder Date

Best Storage Company

Best Makeup Artist

Best Tailor

Best Mani/Pedi

Best Tattoo Parlor

Best Marijuana Cultivation Supplier

Best Tea Shop

Best Travel Agent Best Preschool

Best Martial Arts Classes

Best Therapeutic Massage Best Thrift Store

Best Property

Best Vet

Management Company

Best Vintage Clothing Store

Best Radio Personality

Best Med- Spa Best Men’s Grooming Lounge Best Movers Best Music Lessons Best Organic Food Delivered to Your Door

Best Real Estate Agent

Best Wireless Provider Best Yoga Instructor Best Yoga Studio Best Apartment Building

Best Nonprofit Best Place to Day Trip

Best Place to Volunteer Best Pool with a Bar

Best Real Estate Developer Best Residential Builder Best Restaurant to Bang

Best Charity Event

in the Bathroom

Best College/University

Best Shared Working

Best Personal Trainer

People & Places

Environment

Best Pest Control

BBest Columnist

Best Pet Services

Best Community Blog

Best Sports Coach

Best Pet Shop

Best Drag Queen

Best Summer Camp

Best Painter Best Pawn Shop

Best Shopping Center

GO TO WASHINGTONCITYPAPER.COM/BESTOFPOLL washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 5

Adopt a friend today!

$10 BURGER & BEER MON-FRI 4 P M -7 P M

TRIVIA EVERY M O N D AY & W E D N E S D AY

$3 PBR & NATTY BOH ALL DAY EVERY DAY

FACTS ABOUT AUNTIE EM

Breed: Labrador Retriever Mix • Color: Brindle Age: Young, about 1 year • Size: Med. ~40lbs • Sex: Female

600 beers from around the world

Auntie Em’s Story...

MEET AUNTIE EM!

Auntie Em was surrendered to the shelter by her owners when they could no longer care for her. Auntie Em arrived in D.C. on January 6th and is currently living in doggy daycare but looking for a foster while she waits for her forever home. Auntie Em would be considered medium to high energy and would likely be happiest with an active family. Her temporary foster told us she loves to give kisses, get belly rubs and is always excited to see you. She’s friendly with strangers on walks. Auntie Em loves to play fetch and has a lot of energy to burn on walks/runs. She would make a great running partner. Auntie Em can’t wait to find her forever family in the D.C. area!

NOW OFFERING FREE DELIVERY I am already spayed, up to date with • Natural Dog & Cat Food shots, and good with dogs!

• Raw Dog & Cat Diets

Please contact Rural Dog Rescue www.ruraldogrescue.com to complete an application or visit Auntie Em at the adoption event this Saturday from 12 - 3 at Howl To The Chief 733 8th Street SE DC.

• Pet Supplies • Grooming • Self Serve Dog Wash • Dog Cookies & Cakes • Small Animal & Fish Supplies

” D VICE VOTE PET SER15 T 0 “BES OF DC 2

WAG T I M E T O O 9 0 0 M S T R E E T, S E • WAS H I N G T O N , D C 2 0 0 0 3

P : 2 0 2 - 7 8 9 - 0 8 7 0 • F: 2 0 2 - 3 1 8 - 4 0 14

P : 202 -269 -2765 • F : 202 - 318 - 4 014

6 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

STARTS AT 8PM

F R I D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 2 N D

STAR STRUCK COMEDY DOORS AT 8PM SHOW AT 9PM

S A T U R D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 3 R D

HOT NIGHT PRODUCTIONS

DOORS AT 2PM SHOW AT 3PM M O N D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 5 T H

DISTRICT TRIVIA STARTS AT 730PM

T U E S D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 6 T H

LAST RESORT COMEDY

DOORS AT 8PM SHOW AT 830PM W E D N E S D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 7 T H

DISTRICT TRIVIA STARTS AT 730PM STARTS AT 6PM

emte.

plike ho e a c a l te there’s no p i s s u beca BEST

®

,inc.

T H U R S D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 8 T H

UNDERGROUND COMEDY SHOW STARTS AT 8PM

F R I D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 9 T H

BARE NAKEDCOMEDY DOORS AT 8PM SHOW AT 9PM

Wash D.C 202-362-8900

Mont. Co. 301-424-7100

WAG T I M E , L L C

UNDERGROUND COMEDY SHOW

TERRAPIN BEER EVENT

Arl/Ffx Co. 703-243-3311

12 32 9 T H S T R E E T N W • WAS H I N G T O N , D C 2 0 0 0 1

SPECIFIC IGNORANCE

DOORS AT 6:30PM SHOW AT 7PM

DRAG BRUNCH

Howl to the Chief • 733 8th Street SE 202-544-8710 www.HowlToTheChief.com

PROFESSIONAL IN-HOME PET SITTING

1232 9th St. NW (202) 789-0870 lwagtime@aol.com

T H U R S D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 1 S T

DOORS AT 8PM SHOW AT 9PM

DOG ADOPTIONS (www.ruraldogrescue.com) Every Saturday from 12-3 CAT ADOPTIONS Capital City Cats Every Sunday 12-3

• Cage-Free Daycare & Boarding • Multiple Outdoor Play Grounds • Professional Grooming Salon • Pet Boutique & Essentials • Dog Walking & Feline Care • Pet Transportation, Valet Parking

*all shows 21+

S U N D AY, J A N U A R Y 2 4 T H

Full Service Grooming 7 Days a Week

AWARD WINNING, STATE OF THE ART FACILITY!

Downstairs: good food, great beer: $3 PBR & Natty Boh’s all day every day

EST. 1980

WWW.SITAPET.COM BONDED INSURED

S A T U R D AY, J A N U A R Y 3 0 T H

INTIMATEAPPAREL VARIETY PRESENTS DOORS AT 8PM SHOW AT 9PM

S U N D AY, J A N U A R Y 3 1 S T

LUCRICIA BELOZIA PRESENTS DOORS AT 7PM SHOW AT 8PM

1523 22nd St NW – Washington, DC 20037 (202) 293-1887 - www.bierbarondc.com @bierbarondc.com for news and events

DISTRICTLINE

Tomorrow’s History Today: This was the week that Concepcion Picciotto’s nearly 35-year Lafayette Park peace vigil ended when she died. She was in her 80s.

Our Tale of Snow

How the District coped with this winter’s first major weather event

By Andrew Giambrone Photographs by Darrow Montgomery The snow started falling in D.C. around 1 p.m. on Friday, but the storm of people talking about it had been raging for days—maybe even a full week. Last Wednesday, the region’s evening commute was frozen by roughly one inch of snow, part of a clipper for which officials had not sufficiently prepared. The reviews of the District’s performance were not pretty. Following an apology by Mayor Muriel Bowser for D.C.’s lackluster response on Thursday morning, Washingtonians descended into typical pre-blizzard mayhem, if not panic. Whole Foods, Trader Joe’s, and their peers quickly ran out of provisions; a snow emergency was declared at 9:30 a.m. Friday; and almost everyone hunkered down indoors.

When the snow came, it accumulated quickly. By early Saturday morning, many areas in D.C. had registered at least six inches of snow. Over the course of the day, even more accumulated—nearly two feet by Sunday, according to official estimates—as well as winds gusts in excess of 40 mph. Though dozens of residents in the District lost water or power, outages were generally rare and services restored within hours. An 83-year-old man died of a heart attack Sunday hours after shoveling outside then collapsing in his home.

The District commenced clean-up in earnest that day with continuous runs of heavy

plows on major arterial roads, but it wasn’t enough to get the city up and running by Monday. The mayor closed D.C. Public Schools (charter schools followed soon after) and the local government (the feds followed suit).

Metro, which had shut down entirely over the weekend, ran bare-bones rail and bus service: Three train lines operated, while buses were on a “lifeline” plan. All had delays.

A day later, schools and the federal govern-

ment remained closed, while District agencies and some private companies went back to work. A surprise to few: Commutes bordered on nightmarish for many who made the trek into the office. Metrobus—running on a “severe” service plan—saw delays of more than 30 minutes, and Metrorail’s operating lines had longer headways than usual (a significant portion of the Orange Line, in Virginia, went out of service due to third-rail damage from snow and ice; trains on the Silver line never ran). Some people reportedly turned back home.

Between plowing and temperatures melting the snow, street conditions started to improve, but only so much, and mostly on major corridors.

Residents found themselves hopping from one snowbank to another, as piles pushed aside by plows obstructed rights of way and crosswalks. One could catch a bus, train, or cab; walking around still posed challenges. Officials said cleanup crews were hitting neighborhood streets. More than a few begged to differ.

In the end, one of D.C.’s greatest blessings during the Blizzard of 2016 (the first one, anyway) is that it happened over the weekend, when most 9-to5’ers didn’t have to work and people could enjoy their creature comforts at home—until the stir-crazy set in or roommates drove one another mad, that is. The snow emergency lifted on Wednesday night: an act of man rather than one of nature. It was one thing within the District’s control for the last week. CP

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 7

DISTRICTLINE City Desk

8 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

UNOBSTRUCTEDVIEW Taking the Local Out of Local Radio

By Matt Terl And so we enter the worst two weeks on the football calendar: the interregnum between the conference championship games and the Super Bowl.

There are many hateable things in this gap: weird performance art reporters at Super Bowl Media Day; Media Day in general; the Pro Bowl uniforms... the list is endless. But one thing dwarfs them all—local radio stations broadcasting from Radio Row. Radio Row is a physical location—the spot at the Super Bowl from which the radio and TV shows beam their all-important messages back home—but it’s also a conceptual idea. The league concentrates all the media types in one area, then pushes potential interviewees through like so many animals through an abattoir.

The carcasses in question might include movie stars, current NFL players from eliminated teams, ex-NFL players resting on previous glory, or even other sports media personalities (for the full NFL Human Centipede effect).

Each of these types has something to shill, so there’s a quid pro quo situation where the morning-zoo keepers from any random local market get to talk to Adam Sandler about sports for 80 percent of a segment provided that he gets to talk about his upcoming movie for the other 20 percent, or they get eight minutes of Joe Montana on what the Super Bowl means to him and two minutes of what Skechers should mean to us.

The net result is an assembly line where the same guests cycle through about 60 different radio stations, selling prostate care and anecdotes about what Scott Norwood ate for breakfast before missing one of the most famous kicks in NFL history. It makes for less than thrilling radio, and it happens every year.

Chris Kinard, program director for 106.7 the Fan, has tried other ways—in 2013, he sent his crew to cover MLB spring training instead of media week. And the net result in measurable listenership? “When we didn’t go, there was not a huge impact,” Kinard said. “When we have gone, there hasn’t been a huge impact either.”

Personally, I preferred the spring training approach, because it solved two major problems of Radio Row: 1) It is totally irrelevant to local radio. Sure, there’s not much going on with the local pro

football squad at the moment, but the Capitals are dominating, the Wizards are Wizarding, the Nationals are whiffing on free agents, and the 27 local college basketball teams are continuing to play games. There are things to talk about that do not include Christian Okoye’s favorite brand of energy drink.

2) These interviewees have nothing of interest to say. There are exceptions to this, sure, but the vast majority of the time, these celebrities and ex-athletes will tell the same kind of tired anecdotes, offer the same kind of boring Super Bowl “analysis,” and then move on to the same kind of shilling. There’s very little new there and less that keeps me tuned in. I listen to Phil Simms for too many hours a year to be impressed by what someone has to say simply because they once played in a Super Bowl.

These criticisms aren’t new, and they’re not particularly unique to me. So why do the stations keep doing it? Why ditch your local focus for two weeks?

The most obvious answer is, of course, money. I had figured that. What I hadn’t figured was just how much money. According to Chuck Sapienza, former VP of programming for ESPN 980 and current executive producer for Navy Football, for ESPN 980’s coverage of the 2014 Super Bowl, the station paid about $8,000—hotels, travel, everything—and saw a return in the neighborhood of $50,000.

“So much stuff was sponsored,” Sapienza says. “Every individual show was sponsored. The trip was sponsored. Guests were sponsored.”

At that return on investment, I’d ignore my complaints also.

Sapienza cites other reasons for the trip as well, primarily building relationships that pay off throughout the year (ESPN 980’s relationship with NFL “insider” Adam Schefter started at a Super Bowl when he was much less well known, and continues to this day) but also simply being where the action is.

“Having your people at the center of the biggest sporting event in the country just makes sense,” Sapienza said.

The hosts enjoy the trip, which I can’t fault them for at all. The program directors enjoy the relationship-building and the programming opportunities. Everyone enjoys the money.

And hopefully D.C. listeners will enjoy hearing Steve Young describe the wonders of CP Van Heusen shirts. washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 9

SAVAGELOVE Down to business: Christmas came and went, and every present I bought for my extraordinary husband could be opened in front of our children. He deserves better, and I have a particular gift in mind for Valentine’s Day. My husband has expressed an interest in sounding, something we’ve attempted only with my little finger. He seemed to enjoy it! But the last thing I want to do is damage his big beautiful dick. So is sounding a fun thing? Is sounding a safe thing? Recommendations for a beginner’s sounding kit? Or should I scrap the idea and just get him another butt plug?

—Safety Of Sounding Sounding, for those of you who didn’t go to the same Sunday school I did, involves the insertion of smooth metal or plastic rods into the urethra. Sounding is sometimes done for legitimate medical purposes (to open up a constricted urethra, to locate a blockage), and it’s sometimes done for legitimate erotic purposes (some find the sensation pleasurable, and others are turned on by the transgression, particularly when a man is being sounded, i.e., the penetrator’s penetrator penetrated).

So, yeah, some people definitely think sounding is a fun thing, SOS. “But whether or not something is a safe thing depends on knowledge of the risks/pitfalls and an observance of proper technique,” said Dr. Keith D. Newman, a urologist and a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons.

“The urethral lining has the consistency of wet paper towels and can be damaged easily, producing scarring. And the male urethra takes a bend just before the prostate. Negotiating that bend takes talent, and that’s where most sounding injuries occur.”

Recreational cock sounders—particularly newbies—shouldn’t attempt to push past that bend. But how do you know when you’ve arrived at that bend?

“SOS’s partner should do the inserting initially,” said Dr. Newman, “as the bend in the urethra is easily recognized by the soundee.

Once he is clear on his cues—once he understands the sensations, what works, and when the danger areas are reached—SOS can participate safely with insertion.”

And cleanliness matters, SOS, whether you’re sounding the husband or serving burritos to the public.

“Infection is always an issue,” said Dr. Newman. “Clean is good, but the closer to sterile the better. And be careful about fingers. They can be more dangerous than sounds because of the nails and difficulty in sterilizing.”

So for the record, SOS: Your previous attempts at sounding—those times you jammed your little finger into your husband’s piss slit—were more dangerous than the sounding you’ll be doing with the lovely set of stainless-steel sounding rods you’ll be giving your hubby on Valentine’s Day. “Spit is not lube,” said Dr. Newman. “Water- or silicone-based lubes are good; oilbased is not so good with metal instruments.”

(You can also go online and order little single-serving packets of sterile lubricant. Don’t ask me how I know this.) Using “glass or other breakable instruments” as sounds is a Very Bad Idea. Dr. Newman was pretty emphatic on this point—and while it sounds like a fairly obvious point, anyone who’s worked in an ER can tell you horror stories about all the Very Bad Ideas they’ve retrieved from people’s urethras, vaginas, and rectums.

Now let’s go shopping!

“Choosing the best ‘starter kit’ is not hard: Pratt Dilators are not hard to find online, they’re not that expensive, and they will last a lifetime,” said Dr. Newman. (I found a set of Pratt Dilators on Amazon for less than $30.)

And when your set arrives, SOS, don’t make the common mistake of starting with the smallest/skinniest sound in the pack. “Inserting something too small allows wiggle room on the way in and for a potential to stab the urethral wall,” said Dr. Newman.

The doc’s next safety tip will make sense

10 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

after you’ve seen a set of Pratt Dilators: “Always keep the inserted curve facing one’s face, meaning the visible, external curve facing away toward one’s back.”

You can gently stroke your husband’s cock once the sound is in place, SOS; you can even blow him. Vaginal intercourse is off the table, obviously, and you might not wanna fuck his big beautiful dick with a sound until you’re both feeling like sounding experts. And when that time comes: Don’t stab away at his cock with a sound in order to sound-fuck him. A quality sound has some weight and heft—hold his erection upright, slowly pull the well-lubricated, non-glass sound until it’s almost all the way out, and then let go. It will sink back without any help from you.

Your husband’s butt should be plug-free during your sounding sessions, SOS, as a plug could compress a section his urethra. If you’re skilled enough to work around the bend—or if you’re foolish enough to push past it—the sound could puncture his compressed urethra. And a punctured urethra is every bit as unpleasant as it sounds. (Sorry.)

Finally, SOS, what about coming? Will your husband’s balls explode if he blows a load while a metal rod is stuffed in his urethra?

“Coming with the sound in place is a matter of personal preference,” said Dr. Newman.

“There is no particular danger involved.”

—Dan Savage My wife and I have an amazing relationship. Our sex life is as hot as it can be given a child and two careers. A couple of years ago, I bought her one of those partial-body sex dolls (it has a cock and part of the stomach). We took videos and pictures while using it. Very hot for both of us. We later got a black version of the same toy. (We are white.)

Even hotter videos. I have kept the videos in a secure app on my iPad. Over the past year, I have created Photoshop porn of my wife with black men using screenshots from commercial porn. I haven’t shared this with my wife. We never discussed what

to do with the videos and pics we made. I assumed she trusted me not to share these images with anyone. (I haven’t and won’t!) Is it okay that I have a porn stash that features my wife? Is it okay that I have a stash of Photoshop porn of my wife fucking black men? Should I share this info—and my fantasies—with her? I’ve always fantasized about her being with a black man, but I’m not sure either of us would truly want that to happen.

—Secretly Keeping Encrypted Porn That Isn’t Clearly Allowed Lately You need to speak to your wife about those pics and videos, about the way you’ve manipulated them, and about your fantasies—but that’s a lot to lay on her at once, SKEPTICAL, so take it in stages.

Find a time to ask her about those old pics and videos and whether she wants them discarded or if you can continue to hang on to them. At a different time, bring up your racially charged fantasies and let her know what those partial-body sex dolls were doing for you. And finally, SKEPTICAL, if she reacts positively to your having held on to the photos and to your fantasies, ask her how she feels about you creating a few images using Photoshop of her hooking up with a black man for fantasy purposes only. It’s a little dishonest— you’re asking for permission to do what you’ve already done—but you’ll know what you need to do if her answer to the Photoshop question is “No, absolutely not!” (To be clear: You’ll need to delete those Photoshopped pics.)

All that said, SKEPTICAL, if the images you’re holding on to—the originals and/ or the manipulated ones—could destroy your marriage and/or your wife’s life and/or your wife’s career if they got out (computers can be hacked or stolen, clouds may not be as secure as advertised), don’t wait: Delete all of —Dan the images now.

Send your Savage Love questions to mail@savagelove.net.

Gear Prudence: I’m starting my dream job next week. It’s exciting, but there’s one problem: I’ve bike commuted 10 miles each way to my old job for the last five years and have loved it. But my new job is only a quarter mile away from my apartment, and it seems like it’s too close to bike to work. Is there a minimum distance when bike commuting doesn’t make sense anymore?

—Choosing Lovely Occupation, Sacrificing Exercise Dear CLOSE: Yes and no. A quarter mile isn’t much of a bike ride, and it’s highly unlikely that you’d derive the same joys from it that you have from your former 10-mile commute. Moreover, you’d probably spend as much time getting your bike out of your apartment and locking it up at the office as you would spend actually riding; the math on that simply doesn’t work. In this regard, walking to the office makes more sense and there’s much to recommend it: You still get to spend some time outside and embark on at least a little physical activity before and after the workday.

But also consider this: Maybe having your bike with you at the office rather than at home will facilitate some post-work cycling. Take in some recreational laps or ride to the grocery store. Certainly not every place you’d want to ever go is within walking distance, so you could still bike there. And if there isn’t a place you’d want to go that isn’t within walking distance, come up with one. Also, you must have —GP a really great apartment.

Gear Prudence: I hate riding up hills. How do I —Clearly Legs Inferior, hate this less?

Massively Bummed Dear CLIMB: Sun Tzu said “Know your enemy,” and far be it from GP to disagree. Hop on your bike and take a trip to the National Museum of Natural History. Assiduously study of all the geology exhibits. Read some books about glaciers. Watch a PBS special on plate tectonics. Better yet, rewatch the Sound of Music. If the hills are alive, then surely you can smite them.

Here’s the deal: Hills are what they are, and there’s not much you can do about it. Riding up them is both a physical and mental act, but it’s mostly mental. Part of the trick in overcoming them isn’t thinking that they’re not objectively bad but convincing yourself that you’ve already ridden over a hill comparatively worse. If you’ve done it before, you can assuredly do it again. Or get off your bike and —GP walk. It’s not the end of the world.

Gear Prudence is Brian McEntee, who tweets @sharrowsDC. Got a question about bicycling?

Email gearprudence@washcp.com. washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 11

Illustrations by Lauren Heneghan 12 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

D.C. residents, long frustrated by the heavy hand of Congress meddling in the affairs of the District, appear to be ready to fight back over marijuana. Even though Initiative 71 legalized the drug, out-of-state legislators have effectively blocked the city’s efforts to tax and regulate pot.

According to a new D.C. Vote–Washington City Paper poll, 66 percent of D.C. residents agree that Mayor Muriel Bowser’s administration should pursue a legal method to allow the city to tax and regulate marijuana like it does alcohol. And 79 percent agree that D.C.’s elected officials should use “all legal means” to implement ballot initiatives when Congress blocks them.

“We’ve canvassed across this city in all eight wards twice over the last 18 months, and residents are ready to take on Congress,” says Kim Perry, D.C. Vote’s executive director. “They’re tired of feeling beat up by a dysfunctional body of lawmakers from across the country who don’t understand D.C. residents, and they’re ready to fight back.

“It was sheer validation to what we’ve been hearing.”

A spokesperson for Bowser declined to comment on the poll, which also showed support for the creation and regulation of so-called “cannabis clubs” (61 percent for, 30 percent against, 9 percent unsure). The survey of 962 D.C. voters by Public Policy Polling was performed between Jan. 22 and 24 and has a margin of error of 3.2 percent.

“What I get all the time is people asking questions like, ‘Didn’t we pass marijuana here in the city? Did my vote really matter? What’s going on with that?’” Perry says. “I think there was a lot of unfinished business about that particular ballot initiative that people have wanted answers to. I believe our elected officials, with the broad response of this poll, have permission to take Congress on, within legal means, with the support of residents behind them.”

The poll showed broad agreement among District voters in other areas, too: 69 percent expressed some level of support for term limits for both the mayor and D.C. councilmembers; 87 percent would like to see D.C. gradually raise the minimum wage to $15 per hour; and 80 percent would favor changes in campaign finance laws to allow only small donations matched by limited public funding.

“There’s been a lot of discouragement and dismay around the recent FreshPAC debacle, but even before that voters have been very concerned about pay-to-play in the city and so I think this is a direct response to that,” Perry says. “People want clear, transparent leadership in the —Steve Cavendish city, and they don’t want it tainted by big money.”

H

w we DiD THis

Q7 Cities across the country are raising their

The D.C. Vote–Washington City Paper poll was performed by Public Policy Polling, a national survey firm based in Raleigh, N.C., from Jan. 22 to 24. Respondents were reached via land lines and cell phones. The poll has a margin of error of plus-or-minus 3.2 percentage points. Questions for the poll were developed mainly by D.C. Vote, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization whose main focus is to advocate for D.C. statehood. To see the complete results, visit washingtoncitypaper.com/go/dcpoll2016.

YES / AgREE / SUPPORT

SOMEWHAT DISAgREE

SOMEWHAT AgREE

NO / DISAgREE / OPPOSE

Q5 In 2014, twice as many District residents

NOT SURE

Q1 Do you agree or disagree with the

following statement: When Congress blocks a successful D.C. ballot initiative or referendum that has been approved by the voters, D.C.’s elected officials should use all legal means to implement the measure anyway.

Q3 Do you agree or disagree with the fol-

lowing statement: Since Congress has blocked the District government from taxing and regulating marijuana, marijuana legalization is just another reason why Washington, D.C. should become its own state.

10%

died from a drug overdose than from a traffic accident. More than half of those overdose cases involved heroin or prescription painkillers. A drug called naloxone is successful at reversing overdose from heroin and prescription painkillers. Naloxone acts fast and has no potential for abuse. Local D.C. law already allows anyone to carry naloxone to help save their friends and loved ones, but naloxone supplies in D.C. are low. Would you strongly support, somewhat support, somewhat oppose, or strongly oppose an initiative by Mayor Bowser’s administration to increase the supply of naloxone in D.C.?

10%

7%

12%

minimum wage to $15 per hour. This November, you will have an opportunity to gradually raise the minimum wage in Washington, D.C. to $15 per hour by 2020. Would you definitely support, probably support, probably oppose, or definitely oppose this initiative?

6%

6% 1%

17%

70%

Q8 If an initiative were placed on the ballot that would limit the number of terms that the mayor and D.C. councilmembers can serve, would you definitely support, probably support, probably oppose, or definitely oppose that initiative?

7%

5% 9%

9% NO

YES

27%

46% NO

YES

79%

63%

42%

14%

32% 27%

Q2 Although marijuana is legal to possess

in the District, Congress has blocked the District government from allowing marijuana to be taxed and regulated like alcohol. If a legal method were available for Mayor Bowser to allow marijuana to be taxed and regulated like alcohol, despite the Congressional ban, should the mayor pursue it, or not?

Q4 As you may know D.C. residents voted to legalize adult marijuana use. But some landlords prohibit renters from using marijuana in their home, and renters who use marijuana can be evicted. Some District lawmakers have called for the creation of regulated places where adults can consume marijuana without fear of arrest or eviction. Would you support or oppose a law creating regulated places where adults can legally consume marijuana?

9%

Q6 Although possession of personal amounts of marijuana was legalized by D.C. voters in 2014, people in D.C. caught with small amounts of other illegal drugs for personal use are arrested and incarcerated, even for a first offense. In your view, are these drug possession laws too harsh, too lenient, or just right?

Q9 Recent scandals like Fresh PAC and the

Jeffrey Thompson affair have called into question the influence mega donors have on D.C. politics and elections. Some people would like to change the way we finance elections by getting rid of big donations and allowing only small donations to candidates matched by public funds for candidates that opt in. Would you definitely favor, probably favor, probably oppose, or definitely oppose a plan to fund campaigns with small contributions and limited public funds?

10%

9%

5%

5%

10% 20% 25% NO

30%

YES

OPPOSE

SUPPORT

JUST RIGHT TOO LENIENT

66%

61%

10%

TOO HARSH

53% 27% 60% washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 13

Q10 Would you definitely support, probably support, probably oppose, or definitely oppose building a new stadium for Washington’s NFL team at the current RFK stadium site?

5% 18% 38%

18%

20%

Q11 (Among those who support new stadi-

um) The District of Columbia spent more than $600 million for Nationals Park. Knowing this, would you definitely support, probably support, probably oppose, or definitely oppose the District spending millions for an NFL Stadium?

4%

8% 13%

Darrow Montgomery

35%

40%

Q12 Do you consider the name “Redskins” to be offensive, or not?

7%

35%

NO

joint break

By Andrew Giambrone

YES

58%

Something strange happened at a D.C. Council meeting earlier this month: For a few minutes, it appeared that it had become legal for residents to smoke marijuana in private venues outside of their homes.

It didn’t last long. During the same session on Jan. 5, two councilmembers (Charles Allen and LaRuby May, of wards 6 and 8) switched their votes to maintain a ban on “cannabis clubs” for another 90 days. Mayor Muriel Bowser had lobbied the body to extend the prohibition, which the Council had approved unanimously last March after Initiative 71 went into effect. That

14 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

Sixty-one percent of D.C. voters support the creation of so-called “cannabis clubs.”

ballot measure—which D.C. voters had overwhelmingly supported in November 2014—legalized using and growing small amounts of marijuana at home. But advocates and officials disagreed over whether it had limited consumption activities elsewhere: Those on Bowser’s side favored a strict “home grow, home use” interpretation of the law.

“They snatched a victory from us,” legal-weed advocate Adam Eidinger told City Paper on the afternoon of Jan. 5, when the Council ultimately voted 9–4 to keep prohibiting private venues from letting attendees light up or eat marijuana edibles on site.

“Today showed there’s disagreement. That

sets up a good compromise situation,” said Eidinger.

Whether the ban on cannabis clubs is passed in the form of permanent legislation remains to be seen. On Wednesday, the Council’s Committee on the Judiciary approved language that would maintain it.

The whole Council must now vote on the legislation twice.

But a new D.C. Vote–Washington City Paper poll shows that the majority of District residents wouldn’t support such a law: 61 percent of those polled support a law that would create “regulated places where adults can legally consume marijuana” outside of their homes; 30 percent opposed

Darrow Montgomery/File

such a law, and nine percent reported that they were unsure.

It’s not as though most—or even many— bars and restaurants in D.C. want patrons to get high on their premises, and that’s not really what advocates are asking for, anyway. Kaitlyn Boecker of the Drug Policy Alliance explains that under D.C.’s 2014 marijuana decriminalization law, consumption became illegal in “any place to which the public is invited,” including bars. Letting the emergency law expire would therefore allow consumption only in membership organizations.

Boecker says that if the ban were lifted, no explicit definition of “private club” would remain in the statute; a “narrow exemption from the strict limits on consumption” in the 2014 decriminalization law would persist, though, meaning groups could permit members to consume marijuana in buildings, facilities, or premises “used or operated” by them.

“In practice, this would mean organizations like the University Club could allow cannabis consumption on their premises,” Boecker explains. “There are many examples of venues for social consumption of cannabis, including cannabis clubs and lounges. We can look to Spain, Amsterdam, Alaska, Portland, [Oregon], and some Colorado locales for models.”

Meanwhile, proponents of the ban argue that it’s meant to minimize nuisances toward neighbors of potential pot clubs.

They’ve also expressed concerns about the current lack of regulations and issues that may arise if D.C. tries to put regulations in place.

As of this week, it seems like advocates will be hard-pressed to change policymakers’ minds before the full Council votes on the permanent ban: The Committee on the Judiciary, chaired by Ward 5’s Kenyan McDuffie, approved language that would maintain the prohibition. “This is not a topic on which the committee wishes to move recklessly,” he said, noting that Congress may intervene if D.C. attempts to tax and regulate the local marijuana market using federally appropriated funds. Although Ward 2’s Jack Evans tried to table consideration of the bill and thus avoid voting on its language, his motion was defeated 3-3.

The emergency ban remains in effect until April 13.

But advocates could have a potential ally, or at least a sympathizer, in the mayor. Eidinger and the Marijuana Policy Project, an advocacy group, met with Bowser a couple weeks ago to discuss the ban. The meeting “was a positive development for marijuana advocates looking for a place to use outside home,” Eidinger subsequently tweeted.

The mayor “committed to work on a new social Cannabis use policy.” (A spokesperson for the mayor declined to comment on the meeting.) If the political winds rise in the coming weeks, lawmakers could change their thinking.

Still, any compromise would likely not

amend the basic tenants of Initiative 71, which allows people to possess up to two ounces of weed, grow no more than six cannabis plants at home, and gift as much as one ounce to someone else older than 21.

Selling marijuana remains illegal in D.C.: Recall Kush Gods, the mobile-edibles dispensary whose operators were arrested and charged with distribution of marijuana in December. Its founder claimed people only had to “donate” to receive goods.

Things could stay that way for years without a tax-and-regulate scheme in place and—no less significant—with a Republican-controlled Congress that may not want to open the door to greater legalization in the U.S. But if there’s some legal way for Bowser and the District government to tax and regulate marijuana in the city, despite the Congressional ban, that’s what the majority of D.C. voters want: 66 percent, acCP cording to our poll.

squaD Polls A majority of voters support building a stadium at RFK for Washington’s NFL franchise—but not with public funds.

By Steve Cavendish When D.C. United moves to a new facility at Buzzard Point in two years, Robert F. Kennedy Memorial Stadium will lose its last tenant and be demolished. What will replace it, though, is a source of some contention.

Mayor Muriel Bowser has publicly supported bringing the Washington National Football League team back to the District. That would mean building a new stadium for the franchise, as it’s unlikely that owner Dan Snyder

would privately finance the entire deal.

A majority of those polled—58 percent— support building a stadium at RFK for the NFL franchise, while 36 percent oppose it, according to a D.C. Vote–Washington City Paper poll. But when the question of using city money to build it is raised, that support falls: More than 20 percent of the stadium’s supporters would oppose public funding of it.

A decade ago, seemingly held over a barrel by Major League Baseball, D.C. committed more than $600 million to build Nationals

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 15

mental increases each year after that to reflect inflation. Now a coalition of advocacy groups is working to get an initiative on the November ballot that proposes to raise the minimum wage to $15 an hour by 2020.

Los Angeles, New York, San Francisco, and Seattle are the only other cities in the U.S. that have approved plans to increase their minimum wage to $15 per hour. D.C.’s journey toward that wage has been stickier than in those cities, where Democratic mayors have come out in full support, and D.C.’s initiative has become tangled in some legal backlash.

Unlike her Democratic peers, Mayor Muriel Bowser has been vague about her stance on the $15 minimum wage initiative. Although she supported the $11.50 standard, Bowser told DCist in December that she didn’t like that D.C. government employees and federal workers would be left out of the new increase under the initiative.

A vast majority of D.C. voters support raising the minimum wage to $15 an hour. In a new D.C. Vote–Washington City Paper poll, 70 percent say they would definitely support raising the minimum wage to that level by 2020, while 17 percent say they would “probably” support it.

The fight for a $15 minimum wage could see some progress soon if it passes one of its final legal hurdles. A D.C. Superior Court judge is expected to make a decision this week regarding a civil lawsuit brought by former D.C. Chamber of Commerce President Harry Wingo against the D.C. Board of Elections, which approved the initiative language in July 2015. The suit alleges that the initiaLauren Heneghan

Park, and last summer, Bowser committed more than $150 million to United’s new home. Is there an appetite for more spending on sports?

The Advisory Neighborhood Commission reps nearest to the stadium say “no.”

“I believe the consensus is that a lot of citizens don’t want a stadium there and, to be frank, neither do I,” says Calvin Ward, who represents ANC 6A8.

Denise Rucker Krepp, the ANC 6B10 representative, was more blunt.

“There isn’t support [in the neighborhoods around RFK].They are worried about the cost. There are a lot of people who would like to see money that would go to RFK go for paid family medical leave,” Krepp says. “If you’re going to spend more than $100 million, there’s a feeling here that money would be spent better elsewhere than to give it to Dan Snyder. Why would we give it to a team that only plays eight games a year? There’s no community benefit to that. I think it’s a disgrace that [the mayor] is thinking about spending that money on a football stadium.”

A Bowser spokesperson declined to respond.

One other hurdle the mayor may face is the team’s name. More than half of the poll’s respondents—58 percent—find the team’s name offensive. While Bowser herself has declined to use the nickname when referring to the team, Snyder has refused to consider its removal. “I will never change the name. It’s that simple—NEVER. You can use caps,” he told USA Today in 2013. It makes the act of cutting a deal—one complicated by the Department of Interior’s insistence that the team drop the name before using the federal land RFK sits on—a high wire CP act for Bowser.

A vast majority of D.C. voters support raising the minimum wage to $15 an hour. Will they get the chance to vote for it?

By Allison Kowalski

THe Fair MiniMuM

16 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

As D.C. prepares to enact an $11.50-per-hour minimum wage this summer, advocates are pushing for a new standard that would be more than double the federal minimum.

In 2013, the D.C. Council voted to raise the minimum wage from $8.50 an hour to $11.50 by July 2016, with incre-

tive language is misleading and “arbitrary,” since not all government contract workers would be included.

If the court rules against Wingo’s appeal, the initiative’s supporters will be able to move forward and begin the process of collecting the roughly 24,000 signatures they need to get the measure on the ballot.

Delvone Michael, director of D.C.’s Working Families Party chapter, said he is confident that the court will rule in the favor of the initiative, since it had already been cleared more than once by BOE. Michael said the lawsuit showed the Chamber is “not used to people standing up for themselves.”

“This is out of their purview, and they don’t like it,” Michael said.

The D.C. Chamber of Commerce did not respond to requests for comment.

This much pushback from city officials is an anomaly so far in the national fight for a $15 minimum wage, said Laura Huizar, a staff attorney for the Raise the Minimum Wage project. She said in most cities, the majority of the dissent comes from business owners who fear it will affect their ability to hire and maintain a robust staff.

So far, Walmart has been the most notable business to speak about the potential harm of an increased minimum wage, after it recently cancelled plans for two new store openings in the District. Ward 2 Councilmember Jack Evans told the Washington Post that in a private meeting, Walmart executives cited concerns about the rising minimum wage as part of the reason they pulled out of the plans for the last two locations.

Huizer doesn’t buy this argument, since Walmart has publicly announced scaling back their storefronts as part of a much bigger transition in the company.

“Walmart has already acknowledged the closures are not result of wages and part of bigger plan to increase sales and customer services,” she said.

Michael sees the Walmart pullout as another example of elected officials prioritizing business deals over community needs, since the two stores would have been erected in one of D.C.’s poorest wards.

“I think when you make a deal with the devil you should not be surprised the devil CP lied to you,” Michael said.

BUYD.C.

Audrey Hepburn Style

By Kaarin Vembar

D.C.’s awesomest TOP PRICES PAID events calendar. for your Records (33S or 45S) CD’s or DVD’s

washingtoncitypaper.com/ calendar

NO COLLECTION TOO SMALL or LARGE WE BUY EVERYTHING!

Call STEVE at 301-646-5403 or e-mail:

washingtoncitypaper.com

stevebuysrecords@gmail.com

EPA PUBLIC NOTICE Twisted Sister Hepburn wore pearls as part of her Breakfast at Tiffany’s costume. This updated version can go from the office to a night out.

Necklace, $40. Lou Lou. 1304 Wisconsin Ave. NW. (202) 333-3574.

Administrative Record available for public review

Cleanup of 24th Place Drums Site The U.S. Environmental Protection Agency announces the public availability of the Administrative Record (AR) for removal activities conducted at the 24th Place Drums site, where EPA addressed a number of deteriorating drums containing an unknown substance, which were abandoned behind a building at 2122 24th Place NE in Washington, DC. The AR contains documents about cleanup activities conducted at the site. EPA successfully completed a removal (cleanup) action at the property to ensure public health and the environment remain protected from potential exposure to any hazardous substances in the drums.

Cleanup documents can be viewed at the following locations: 1. Online at www.epa.gov/arweb. Select “DC” and “24th Place Drums” 2. Environmental Protection Agency, Region 3 office 1650 Arch Street, Philadelphia 19103 Please call (215) 814-3157 to schedule an appointment.

LBD BFF The little black dress became synonymous with Hepburn’s style.

Burberry dress, $100. Clothes Encounters of a Second Kind. 202 7th St. SE. (202) 546-4004.

tomorrow exchange buy * *sell*trade sell*trade

Oscar Wild Hepburn won an Oscar for Roman Holiday. You can practice your acceptance speech with this toy replica, or just let it grace your mantelpiece.

Oscar, $7. Chocolate Moose. 1743 L St. NW. (202) 463-0992.

Flat Out Gorgeous While everyone else was in stilettos, Hepburn was wearing classically chic flats.

Gucci flats, $123. Ella-Rue. 3231 P St. NW. (202) 333-1598.

Raise Some Eyebrows Before there was Cara Delevingne there was Audrey Hepburn. Get perfectly sculpted brows with this slanted sculpting pencil.

Hourglass brow sculpting pencil, $32. Blue Mercury. 1427 P St. NW. (202) 238-0001.

GEORGETOWN: 3279 M St. NW • 202-333-2829 14th STREET CORRIDOR: 1318 14th St. NW • 202-299-9148

BuffaloExchange.com washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 17

COMPETITION ROOMS

CORPORATE TEAM BUILDING

DuPont Circle

Is the Glass half full?

Is the Glass half empty? how about half off!

Teams of 2 up to 35

with one goal - getting out!

realdeal.washingtoncitypaper.com

Voting ends March 1. washingtoncitypaper.com

BEST OF 2016 OUT APRIL 7 Reserve Now! Call the advertising department to book your Best of D.C. ad today: 202-650-6927

18 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

DCFEED

Columbia Room is back. On Feb. 9, Derek Brown will reopen his acclaimed cocktail bar in Shaw. Read all about it at washingtoncitypaper.com/go/columbiaroom.

YOUNG & HUNGRY

Expensive Tastes Why you shouldn’t hate the $100 cocktail Tom Brown offers a $100 French 95 at his new bar, Left Door.

The World’s Greatest Cocktail certainly isn’t the cheapest.

At recently opened cocktail den Left Door, 20-year-old Pappy Van Winkle bourbon is combined with Louis Roederer Cristal Champagne, lemon juice, and honey to make a French 95.

The price tag? $100.

For $50, drinkers can instead opt for the Tribute to the World’s Greatest Cocktail made with Thomas Handy Rye and Ruinart Rosé.

And for those less flush with cash, there’s Gimme a Fucking French 95.

The $10 cocktail includes rail rye whiskey (George Dickel) and bubbles “from close to Champagne” (Charles de Fère).

“We don’t mind using the best of the best to do what we really can do,” says owner and bartender Tom Brown, formerly of The Passenger. “It was a mission statement saying, ‘We’re not afraid to use nice things.’”

When a cocktail costs more than a flight to New York, it can come off as pure gimmick. And there are plenty of examples of drinks that are expensive purely for the sake of being expensive: One local nightclub, Heist, once offered a $1,500 three-cocktail flight with a diamond garnish. Meanwhile, Claudia’s Steakhouse added a $125 gin martini to its menu after some lawyers reportedly remarked the menu was “too cheap.”

But at Left Door as well as at Dram & Grain, the cocktail haven in the basement of Jack Rose Dining Saloon, there’s a legitimate case to be made for a hefty cocktail price tag and for mixing drinks with prized rare ingredients that are typically sipped and savored on their own. While some purists may find the idea of putting 23-year-old Pappy Van Winkle in a mint julep akin to driving a 1964 Aston Martin DB5 on a muddy, unpaved road, these bartenders argue that no spirit is so sacred that it can’t be used in a cocktail.

the menu with a price tag in the triple digits for now, Brown says the tiered pricing is meant to serve as a signal to drinkers that they can upgrade just about any cocktail. He’s long been a collector of rare and unique spirits, which have now found a home at Left Door.

“Having all these really good ingredients available, the temptation is just way too overwhelming to mix them around,” Brown says. “We’re living in this golden era where we have everything available to us, and I don’t see any reason why we can’t experiment with everything.”

Over at Dram & Grain, bartender Lukas Smith first introduced some pricey cocktails as a way to subsidize his own drinking wishlist. “How do I get my hands on a sip of a $1,500 bottle of Chartreuse? How do I do that? Maybe what I do is I come up with some sort of event for it,” he explains. On St. Patrick’s Day, for example, he concocted the Tipperary Insanity with 21year-old Redbreast Irish whiskey, a Green Chartreuse believed to have been bottled in 1967, and Cocchi Rosso vermouth for $85.

“Once you’ve tasted something like that, it’s hard not to keep pursuing it,” Smith says, “and that’s the way it is with all finer things, I guess.”

Smith started offering other such cocktails as occasional specials, including the $135 Champion Elysées with L’Artisan du Cognac Grande Champagne No. 50, the 1967 Green Chartreuse, and lemon. These intermittent luxuries have since graduated into everyday menu staples dubbed the “Sacred Slaughter.”

If anyone considered rare whiskey too sacred to slaughter, you might think it would be Smith’s boss, Jack Rose ownDarrow Montgomery

By Jessica Sidman

Brown says the idea harkens back to the “silver age of cocktails,” the Victorian era, from which Left Door takes inspiration. “There were some really good ingredients available, and they used them,” says Brown. “If they were putting a red wine float on something, there might have been a chance that it was a really good Bordeaux.”

While The World’s Greatest Cocktail is the only drink on

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 19

VOTED TOP 100 BEER BARS IN THE USA! DISCOVER 600+ BEERS FROM AROUND THE WORLD!

HAPPY HOUR SPECIAL

4–7 PM Monday through Friday ANY DRAFT & A BURGER JUST TEN BUCKS

20 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

DCFEED(cont.) er Bill Thomas. The whiskey aficionado, whose daily hobby is watching whiskey auctions, doesn’t even believe in tainting a drink with ice. (“It dulls the palate. You’re missing the nuance of the whiskey,” he warns.)

But Thomas is totally on board with a cocktail being made with a prized, rare whiskey—as long as that spirit shines through and delivers more than just the alcohol. “What kills me is when someone takes a great whiskey and mixes it with Coke or mixes it with soda,” Thomas says. “There’s no craftsmanship here. There’s no enhancing the whiskey.

There’s no celebration of the whiskey as an ingredient… You just literally killed something just to kill it.”

Smith argues that if bartenders can make great cocktails by smartly combining ingredients with so-so spirits, they can make something even better with the best spirits. “If it lives up to the hype, and it’s not just a marketdriven rarity, if it actually is in a special class, it’s going to exhibit characteristics that you just can’t replicate with lesser spirits,” Smith says.

Brown compares it to his love of Billie Holiday: “I’ve enjoyed listening to her since I was a kid in my grandma’s kitchen. And when Verve remixed some Billie Holiday with some more contemporary beats, I was kind of put off… And then I listened to it, and I thought, ‘Wow, that’s really cool.’ It doesn’t change my love for the original, but I also really, really like that new recording of it too… I think there’s room for both things.”

Because it’s obviously very expensive to experiment with very expensive spirits, Smith and Brown rely on tried and true classic cocktail recipes. “I’m not going to crush an $800 bottle of whiskey experimenting with things,” Brown says.

Ultimately, Brown and Smith say they might only make the drink once or twice before they first put it on the menu. Brown says he tries to do trial runs with less pricey spirits; Smith says he’ll start with 60 percent of a cocktail and then build it up in the glass. So, for example, if he was planning to put an ounce and a half of whiskey in the drink, he’ll use an ounce and then slowly add more until the balance is right.

“I make sure I have a clear head and I’m focused,” Smith says. Plus, “I definitely take great care with those bottles when I’m opening them.”

Mentally, Smith says his Sacred Slaughter cocktails are more time-consuming than other cocktails because of the hours he spends thinking about things like what vermouth will pair best or how and why the different ingredients blend together.

“It’s more like I’m painting or making a collage of sorts. I’m building the flavor and the aroma, and I’m playing things off of each other,” Smith says.

And people are buying them. Brown says

he’s sold as many as 10 of his $100 cocktails since opening in early January. It might not seem like a lot, but it’s the equivalent of more than 80 $12 cocktails. (Brown uses a Perlage Champagne preservation tool designed to keep the Cristal good for at least a week—not that he’s had a bottle that long. The wine is also offered by the glass for $75, and Brown says he’s been going through about six bottles about every week and a half.)

At Dram & Grain, Smith sells one or two Sacred Slaughter cocktails a week. And even if someone doesn’t buy the cocktail, they might buy an ounce of one of the spirits. “Once someone starts talking about it, usually somebody ends up with one,” Smith says. “I’d say maybe one out of 10 times that it comes up, something is purchased. And I would say two out of those three times, somebody orders an ounce of the Chartreuse, for example.”

The drinks still require a sales pitch. After all, most people consider $14 cocktails too expensive. But as a former sommelier, Smith sees a bit of a double standard. People are more likely to question an expensive cocktail than an expensive wine. “On a busy Friday night in D.C., how many $600 bottles of wine are sold across the city? I would say 100 maybe. It happens a lot,” says Smith.

Plus, Smith says Sacred Slaughter cocktails aren’t marked up as much as other drinks. At $85, he says the Tipperary Insanity is pricey but a value. “The base spirits alone would cost more than that typically at Jack Rose,” he says.

Smith says the people who buy the Sacred Slaughter cocktails generally don’t come in looking for them, which he sees as an indicator of a general openness to the idea. He finds that there’s a certain type of person who just wants to know the difference between a cocktail made with a $50 whiskey versus a $500 whiskey. But at the same time, Thomas believes more people are willing to try these kinds of cocktails because of a growing appreciation for spirit-making as an art and bartending as a profession.

Thomas also finds that making cocktails with pricey or rare spirits can take these products off their high horse. Thomas notes how the hype around Pappy Van Winkle, for example, created an artificial demand that drove up the price of the whiskey. He sees adding it to a cocktail as a revolt against marketing. “This is about enjoying what you’re drinking. This is about not taking it too serious,” he says.

It’s also a reminder that no matter how expensive, old, or rare a bottle is, it exists to be consumed.

“It’s not a museum,” Smith says. “If it just sits on the shelf forever, it’s going to die, and no one will have ever enjoyed it. And that, to CP me, is a shame.”

Eatery tips? Food pursuits? Send suggestions to jsidman@washingtoncitypaper.com.

DCFEED

what we ate last week:

Khao soi gai (chicken and noodle curry), $16, Doi Moi. Satisfaction level: 4 out of 5 what we’ll eat next week:

Fried chicken and waffle, $16, Convivial. Excitement level: 4 out of 5

Fowl Play 2016 is the year of the chicken. The Chinese zodiac may not recognize it, but D.C.’s food scene will. Chefs’ obsession with

pork belly and “face” bacon is giving way to thighs and drumsticks. Consider that two of the most raved-about new dishes of last year were the Taiwanese-style fried chicken at Maketto and the Southern-style fried chicken at Boss Shepherd’s, and that’s just the beginning. Here are five examples of chicken getting its due this year.

—Jessica Sidman

Laura Hayes

Grazer

Underserved The best cocktail you’re not ordering

What: Screw You, Rusty with Bols Genever, Laird & Company’s AppleJack, Bonal, Drambuie, housemade apple bitters, and a Laphroaig rinse Where: Roofers Union, 2446 18th St. NW Price: $12

The Bird

The team behind The Pig is flocking toward poultry for their next venture. What started as a fast-casual restaurant devoted to fried chicken has morphed into a full-service eatery at 11th and O streets NW that will highlight birds of all feathers. Aside from roast chicken and chicken soup, The Pig chef Michael Bonk will prepare dishes incorporating duck, squab, quail, turkey, and grouse. The two-story restaurant, complete with second floor patio, is set to open in late summer.

Liz Clayman

The Chickery

The chicken-centered fast-casual restaurant from Toronto opened in Dupont Circle at the start of the year. Founded by David Adjey, who’s starred on various Food Network Canada shows, the franchise focuses on roast chickens—whole, halved, or quartered. Other offerings include chicken fingers and chicken “feathers” (wider and flatter than the fingers) paired with dipping sauces like ginger-jalapenoplum and smoky ancho barbecue.

Just Chicken The Kinship Roast Chicken

At Eric Ziebold’s long-awaited Shaw restaurant, Kinship, the dish that’s quickly becoming a signature and a favorite is a simple roast chicken. The black feathered bird from upstate New York is cooked with a lemon-garlic panade under the skin, deboned, and served with pommes rissolées (the fancy French term for browned potatoes), frisée salad, and Parker House rolls. It may cost $56, but it feeds at least two. And while Kinship’s menu offers more decadent dishes like lobster French toast and whole roasted foie gras, this one is an unfussy comfort. “You don’t have to think about the chicken,” says Ziebold. “It’s just delicious.”

The Chick’n Shack

Burger bastion Shake Shack is no longer all about beef. On Jan. 14, the popular restaurant chain debuted the Chick’n Shack, its first chicken sandwich. Cage-free, antibiotic-free, hormone-free chicken is marinated in buttermilk, battered, and fried before it’s stacked with pickles, shredded lettuce, and a buttermilk mayo with chives, parsley, and thyme. The stuffings are cushioned by a potato roll, and Louisiana hot sauce is available as a condiment. Think of it as an upgraded take on the McChicken.

The name of this restaurant pretty much says it all. Coming to 928 U St. NW, the eatery plans to serve everything from barbecue chicken to fried chicken, a rep from the restaurant told Borderstan. And it may be open 24 hours a day, which means chicken all the time.

What You Should Be Drinking The first thing that hits the glass in the Screw You, Rusty comes from a spray bottle. “Rinsing” the drink with Laphroaig, one of the peatiest Scotches on the planet, imparts just a twinge of smoke to remind imbibers they’re drinking a twist on the Rusty Nail. But instead of the two-ingredient cocktail made solely of Scotch and Drambuie, bartender Erin Goodman’s drink has a few more party guests: Bols Genever, Laird & Company’s AppleJack, Bonal, and bitters made with local apples from the Columbia Heights farmers market. The result is a whiskey drinker’s gin cocktail that’s as ready for winter as Leonardo DiCaprio in The Revenant. “Bols Genever is a funky, original gin before gin was gin,” General Manager Dave Delaplaine explains. “It tastes like a whiskey-gin hybrid, so when you put it in a cocktail, you want to approach it more like whiskey because of its depth.” Bonal, a quinine-spiked wine cordial, lends bitterness while the two apple ingredients bring the sweet.

Why You Should Be Drinking It Delaplaine says customers balk at the drink because of the mysterious ingredients, but they shouldn’t because it tastes like an ohso-hot-right-now old fashioned. “The base spirit is going to scare people off and then it goes crazy from there, but it all plays really well together,” he says. The bar team’s goal was to make a cocktail with Drambuie, since the booze made of a blend of aged Scotch, honey, and herbs typically sits on the shelf. So much so that Delaplaine had trouble finding it. “Bartenders today are more up for a challenge,” he says. “We’re asking, ‘How do I incorporate things into a cocktail and convince people they like it?’” Little convincing is needed. The dark and broody cocktail with a welcome warming quality begs to be sipped after dinner.

—Laura Hayes

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 21

A Ball of Fun for Everyone

We provide high quality developmental sports, fitness, and enrichment programs which empower children to live healthy & active lifestyles. đŏ 3:1 Camper to Counselor ratio đŏ Kids 3.5-12 yrs of all athletic abilities are welcome đŏ Our campers average over 10,000 daily steps at camp!

Come JUNE 20TH-AUG 5TH Join Us

Early Bird Registration $275 (Early Bird & Multiple Sibling Discount offered)

CAMP LOCATION

WWW.KIDSELITESPORTS.ORG

22 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

(240) 321-9287

Woodrow Wilson Senior High School State of the Art Facility 3950 Chesapeake St., NW - Washington, DC 20016

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 23

24 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

CPARTS

Ford’s Theatre offers free performance of The Glass Menagerie after blizzard forces cancellation of all its weekend performances washingtoncitypaper.com/go/glassmenagerie

FILM

The Big Shorts

The year’s best cinema can be found in the Oscar categories most often ignored.

By Noah Gittell

gut-wrenching turn after another. On their walk to interrogate a bomb-maker, a passing cyclist gets blown up by an IED, and that’s the best thing that happens that day. It’s a difficult watch, and although it earns its hopeful ending, the anguish experienced along the way is not quite worth the payoff.

For casual viewers of the Academy Awards, that moment in the show when they announce the winners of Best Live Action Short and Best Animated Short serves as an unofficial bathroom break. This is understandable: The era in which short films were routinely screened at cinemas has long since passed. Viewers are even more likely to pay attention to obscure categories like Sound Editing and Visual Effects, if only because they are more familiar with the nominated films.

Those who do seek out the short films will be richly rewarded for their diligence. Awards season may be filled with the year’s best cinema, but it’s also marked by the worst kinds of Hollywood excess: hours of red carpet footage, shameless Oscar campaigning, and gossip-driven coverage of the Academy horserace passing for film criticism. If you’re sick of it, the short films will make you well again.

There are few—if any—stars involved, and, with some entries as brief as 10 minutes, they showcase efficient filmmaking at its finest.

You’ll need to clear an afternoon for The Revenant or The Hateful Eight, as well as a few hours to recover. But this year’s short films each tell a complete, compelling story in the time it takes to watch the trailers before a typical Hollywood movie.

Because there’s little marketing for these films, you can enter each story free of expectation. That naiveté works marvelously, for example, in Alles wird gut (Everything Will Be Okay), a German live-action short that’s the longest of the bunch at 30 minutes. It opens with a mundane activity—Michael, a divorced father picking up his eight-year-old daughter Lea from her mother’s home—and then slow-

Coincidentally, the animated shorts deal with similarly painful subjects—death, grief, children suffering—but their mood is lightened by the whimsical possibilities of their form. Take Bear Story, which imagines the horrors of war, imprisonment, and refugees through a fantastic world inhabited entirely by animals. The protagonist, a bear who lives with his wife and child in a city apartment, is taken from his home and forced to perform with other kidnapped animals in the circus. It’s a poignant story of intersectionality in social justice movements (and it has some lovely things to say about the purpose of art), using gorgeous, tactile animation and visual splendor inspiring enough to make the pain bearable. It’s one of the best films of the year of any length.

So is The World of Tomorrow, the short with the biggest buzz and, thus, the likely Oscar winner. This magnificent, experimental scifi epic by Don Hertzfeldt centers on a young girl who is visited by her third-generation self (in the future, it is explained, we will download our consciousness into new bodies as we age). The film spans time and dimension, attacking metaphysical concepts with both humor and empathy. It’s 16 minutes of mindblowing awesomeness, and while it’s a bit too intellectual to achieve an emotional impact, it’s still the most thought-provoking piece of science fiction in years.

Russia’s We Can’t Live Without the Cosmos could also be considered sci-fi, since it concerns a space mission, but its focus is entirely human. Following two long-time friends as they go through astronaut training together, the film takes a somber turn as one is chosen to embark into outer space without the other. In

Oscar Nominated Short Films 2016: Live Action

Stutterer

Oscar Nominated Short Films 2016: Animated

ly devolves into emotional trauma. It seems innocuous at first; the two go to a toy store, and he promises her a trip to the fair later on to ride the bumper cars. But soon, alarming details begin to creep in. Director Patrick Vollrath keeps things insular; we never have any more information than Lea does, but an adult sensibility can piece together the clues. Alles wird gut morphs seamlessly from a mystery to a domestic thriller, easing the audience into its awfulness so slowly that we become just as powerless as its characters.

On the other end of the pain-pleasure spectrum is Stutterer, a British romance about a young man with a crippling stutter. Although director Benjamin Clearly effectively conveys the anguish of his predicament—the first scene, in which he tries and fails to call customer service to inquire about a billing error, speaks volumes—he chooses a more hopeful sensibility. At heart, Stutterer is a romance.

When his online girlfriend suggests an in-person meeting, the man is paralyzed from fear, and his efforts to overcome it carry large stakes.

It may look like a rom-com, but Stutterer is actually about a man deciding whether or not to be alive. It’s the short that looks most like a Hollywood film, which means it’ll probably

win the Live Action category.

It’s also by far the easiest watch in the group.

In general, the live-action shorts will put you through the emotional ringer, with several hinging on child suffering. Shok focuses on a friendship between two boys in Kosovo as Serbian soldiers take over the country. One starts doing favors for the soldiers to earn some extra cash, and when he brings his buddy along, their friendship is soon pushed to the breaking point by their violent, manipulative oppressors. English Director Jamie Donoughue and his young actors understand the rhythms of adolescent male friendship, and since the film ends—suddenly—as a portrait of refugees, it seems extra timely in our current geopolitical climate.

The last two live-action shorts also revolve around conflict, although neither is as effective as Shok. Ave Maria is a slight but impactful tale of an Israeli family who gets stuck in the West Bank after accidentally crashing their car into a convent. As the nuns try to help them out, the clash of cultures is mostly played for laughs. Day One, however, opts for brutal realities as a means of generating empathy between warring sides. Depicting the first day on the job for a female Middle Eastern translator hired by the U.S. military, the film takes one

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 25

CPARTS Continued

a lineup populated with eye-grabbing visuals, Cosmos’ 2D, Saturday-morning aesthetic won’t dazzle you, but it’s affecting all the same.

Rounding out the animated shorts are Sanjay’s Super Team, a predictably winning Pixar short about an Indian boy whose love of superheroes conflicts with his father’s piety, and Prologue, a decidedly adult story of war. Sanjay is visually engaging, and it tells a culturally-specific story with authenticity, but if it fails to dazzle, it’s only because Pixar has consistently raised the bar over the years. Prologue feels wildly out of place, however; a graphically violent and lyrical examination of war that includes neck-gouging and testicle-slashing.

Its brutal imagery compels the eye but captures neither the heart nor the head. That kind of sensationalism might fly with the Academy—I’m looking at you, The Revenant—but the shorts, as you’ll see, have higher standards.

Washington City Paper Wed, Jan. 27, 2016 1/12 H (4.666” x 1.603”) Non-SAU Landmark Theatres/BP

original file: Adobe

CP

Oscar Nominated Short Films 2016: Live Action and Animated open Friday at Landmark’s E Street Cinema.

FOLGER

THEATRE

The World of Tomorrow

“I HAVE HAD A MOST RARE VISION…”

2015/16 SEASON

Fri & Sat, Jan. 29 & 30 at 11:30pm!

HOSTED BY NATE BAER & MIKE KELLY OF THE GODZILLA POD-WAR HOUR!

Buy Advance Tickets Online

tickets.landmarktheatres.com

BEST OF 2016 HITTING NEWSTANDS APRIL 7 Reserve Now! Call the advertising department to book your Best of D.C. ad today: 202-650-6927 washingtoncitypaper.com

SHAKESPEARE’S TIMELESS ROMANTIC COMEDY Directed by AARON POSNER

ON STAGE NOW THRU MARCH 6 www.folger.edu/theatre | 202.544.7077 Pictured: Holly Twyford as Bottom. Photo by James Kegley

2616-FT-0021_CityPaper_MND_2.indd january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com 1

1/27/16 9:48 AM

“A sharply moving synthesis of man and nature, east and west, death and rebirth” —The Guardian

Dance Theatre of Taiwan Lin Hwai-min, Artistic Director

PRESENTED BY

E EN AV RK YO

E TN IE S OK

AV E

N E

K WIC FEN W ES T

VI RG IN IA

NE ST

E TN IE S OK

NE ST ET UD LLA GA

E TN ES NC IDE OV PR

L RA NT CE

Save the Date!

NE PL

Crafty Bastards Cabin Fever Indoor Show! New Location! One Day Only!

1401 NEW YORK AVENUE NE, WASHINGTON, DC 20002 • 571.748.3239 • HECHTWAREHOUSE.COM

Huang Pei-hua and Tsai Ming-yuan in Rice, photo by Liu Chen-hsiang.

E TN HS 16T

W NE

Rice

Saturday, Feb. 6, 2016 10 a.m. - 7 p.m.

New LocatioN: Hecht Warehouse

1401 New York Ave. NE Washington, DC www.washingtoncitypaper.com/craftybastards

D.C. PREMIERE

February 12 & 13 | Opera House TICKETS ON SALE NOW! KENNEDY-CENTER.ORG (202) 467-4600 Tickets also available at the Box Office. Groups call (202) 416-8400.

International Programming at the Kennedy Center is made possible through the generosity of the Kennedy Center International Committee on the Arts.

KENNEDY-CENTER.ORG (202) 467-4600 Tickets are also available at the Box Office. Groups call (202) 416-8400. washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 27

CPARTS Arts Desk

At the Historical Society of Washington, an exhibition of Chris Earnshaw’s Polaroid photos captures a changing D.C. washingtoncitypaper.com/go/chrisearnshaw

9:30 Club’s World’s Fair exhibition sparked controversy for allegedly whitewashing its own history.

Nearly a month later and we still have Backyard Band’s cover of “Hello” stuck in our heads. Not complaining, though.

28 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

Darrow Montgomery

Makin’ D.C. weird again: Local musician Janel Leppin is launching a new experimental record label, Wedderburn Records.

Darrow Montgomery

PJ Harvey’s new album will feature songs about her time spent in D.C., including “River Anacostia” and “Near the Memorials to Vietnam and Lincoln.”

SNL’s Aidy Bryant debuts a trailer for her new short film, soundtracked by Priests’ “No Love/No Weapon.”

Virginia classical musical festival Castleton Festival is taking a yearlong hiatus to figure out a solid financial future for the continuation of the fest.

The blizzard caused the cancellation of nearly everything arts related all weekend. Please, no more snow.

Brooklyn Rider & Gabriel Kahane Sat, Feb 6, 8pm Sixth & I Historic Synagogue

Brooklyn Rider “provides two hours of unalloyed listening joy,” trumpeted the Washington Post. The four virtuoso chamber musicians return this season with fellow Brooklynite and composer/ pianist/singer/songwriter Gabriel Kahane, whose music—a blend of classical and TICKETS: indie-folk— has been described as “all-(202) 547-1122 • VelocityDC.org around dazzling....music with something to say” (The Los Angeles Times).

Roomful of Teeth & American Contemporary Music Ensemble Sat, Feb 13, 8pm Sixth & I Historic Synagogue

The powerhouse combination of Grammy winners Roomful of Teeth and new music dynamos ACME features three celebrated composers in a program for voices and strings: Baroque master Henry Purcell, British composer Gavin Bryars, and Pulitzer Prize-winner Roomful member Caroline Shaw.

TICKETS:

WashingtonPerformingArts.org

(202) 785-9727

Made possible by the Abramson Family Foundation and BB&T Wealth.

GREAT PERFORMANCES AT MASON VISIT US AT CFA.GMU.EDU

Polish The Band Baltic of the Royal MarinesOrchestra Philharmonic

Boguslaw Dawidow, Featuring the Pipes,conductor Drums, and Marcin Koziak, piano Highland Dancers of the Scots Guards

SATURDAY, SATURDAY, JANUARY JANUARY 30 23 AT AT 8 2 P.M. P.M. & 8 P.M. Wagner: Overture, The Flying Dutchman All the pomp and grandeur that characterize centuries of Rimsky-Korsakov: Symphonic from Scheherazade British military tradition are onSuite display when these military Chopin: Piano Concerto, No.full 2 in F minor bands take the stage in their regalia.

Bring the family to enjoy the bagpipes, the brass, and athe regimental marches This exceptional ensemble brings splendid evening of and Scottish that are special of the favorite worksHighland from thedancing 19th century thata are full part of Romantic British past $50, and present. passionmilitary and drama! $43, $30$52, $44, $31 ff

Mummenschanz Polish Baltic FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5 AT 8 P.M. Philharmonic Orchestra If you’ve not yet seen Mummenschanz, catch them now

Boguslaw Dawidow, with us! The witty and whimsicalconductor Swiss troupe will get your imagination going with piano a delightful, playful show of clever Marcin Koziak, illusions and funny narratives, all performed in complete SATURDAY, JANUARY 30 AT 8 P.M. silence. “What Mummenschanz does so extraordinarily well is Wagner: Flying Dutchman create its Overture, own comicThe universe–a place of constant wonder and Rimsky-Korsakov: Symphonic Suite from Scheherazade ingenuity.”

(Boston Herald) Chopin: $48, $41,Piano $29 ffConcerto, No. 2 in F minor This exceptional ensemble brings a splendid evening of favorite works from the 19th century that are full of Romantic passion and drama! $50, $43, $30

Virginia Opera

Romeo and Juliet SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13 AT 8 P.M. SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14 AT 2 P.M. Treat your Valentine to a romantic date with Gounod’s luminous setting of the quintessential love story. A sensational success from its premiere, it’s a gorgeous opera, filled with beautiful French Romantic period music. Sung in French with English supertitles. $98, $80, $48 Special Valentine’s Day Ticket Package: two tickets, champagne and chocolates, special photo booth, and two commemorative champagne glasses.$225, $190, $125

ff = Family Friendly performances that are most suitable for families with younger children

TICKETS

888-945-2468 OR CFA.GMU.EDU

Located on the Fairfax campus, six miles west of Beltway exit 54 at the intersection of Braddock Road and Rt. 123. washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 29

GalleriesSketcheS Survival of the bitteSt “Colby Caldwell: how to survive your own death” At Hemphill Fine Arts to March 5 Over the course of his career, Colby Caldwell has turned to an old mistake again and again in the search for new photography. What happened is a bit of personal (and local) lore: Back in 1999, he was converting Super 8 film into digital video. Something went wrong, “untitled (RED)” by Colby Caldwell, 2015 though, and a routine task generated a new artifact—a glitch file. columns of pigment interlock like cells under He might have easily dragged it into the a microscope, suggesting an underlying order trash bin without giving it a second thought. governing the (dis)array. This is an illusion for Instead, he got curious. The file appeared to a number of reasons. At the most literal level, be small, not much larger than a thumbnail, the file is broken, so its logic might be as well. but it proved to be almost limitlessly deep. As But for the purposes of photography, these he surveyed the surface of this digital land- are landscapes like any other: The order is alscape, he discovered an intricate grid of criss- ways virtual, asserted over the landscape by crossing boulevards and avenues, lava-lamp the photographer. globules frozen into crystalline arrangements.

One series might appear to show nature as it Caldwell’s resulting investigations for a series is; the other, a depiction of the extreme oppocalled “how to survive your own death” has site of nature. But Caldwell builds both sets of appeared in some form or another in each of photos from the same elements: texture, colCaldwell’s shows at Hemphill Fine Arts for or, and pattern. One of his digital landscapes, more than 15 years. “how to survive your own death (223),” capOnce again, Caldwell reprises the theme tures the resolution at which his corruptwith “how to survive your own death,” his ed blobs appears to break down into pixelathomonymous show at Hemphill. The ex- ed building blocks. At the other end of the hibit is split between Caldwell’s surveys— spectrum, Caldwell’s photo of a nest, “mirprints from his dives into the abstract depths ror, mirror (11),” emphasizes the parts over of corrupted digital interference—alongside the whole—twigs and stems and little bits of more traditional still-life photos. Together, earth. Hovering over the entire show is death, these series tease out what it means to con- a cold concept rendered in warm tones, unitstruct photos. One series is no more natural ing natural and virtual systems. than the other.

Caldwell raised all the same issues in In “untitled (RED),” a lifeless bird appears “Spent,” a two-part series at Hemphill and Cicomposed against a deep burgundy backdrop. vilian Arts Projects, in 2012. This time around, The photo is rich and gothic, a still-life, or na- his investigation is tighter, with more works ture-morte, painting that happens to take the from the digital series and none of the photos form of a photograph. Caldwell echoes several of empty shotgun shells. With this show, he’s philosophical traditions, including the vanitas achieved parity; he may have even completed studies by 17th-century Dutch painters. His this long-running, slow-burn investigation. photos linger over every fibrous hair on the One work appears to bring the project dead bird’s wing, a fixation on detail consis- full-circle: “how to survive your own death tent with naturalist traditions from Albrecht (whole),” a three-by-four-inch print of the Dürer on. corrupted file as it appears without any maYet at such exquisite detail, nature winds up nipulation. A glitchy block of pixels, attraclooking unnatural in Caldwell’s photos. The tive on its own merits as a happy accident, but fine hairs and feathers of the bird in “untitled important as a capstone to a years-long inqui(RED)” appear in neon, iridescent, emergen- ry. While Caldwell may not be done printing cy colors. Another photo of a moth, “untitled these bit-works, he has finally finished them, (WHITE),” yields soft, powdered textures in a sense, by marrying them with his “nature that seem out of this world. How far apart are morte” series, by sussing out the patterns— these from the extraordinary range of colors and the noise—that surface in natural selecselected by Caldwell for the various “how to tion and techno abstraction alike.

—Kriston Capps survive your own death” works?

For their part, the “how to survive your own death” photos appear to abide by some 1515 14th St. NW #300. Free. unknown (and unknowable) rules. Rows and (202) 234-5601. hemphillfinearts.com.

30 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

KURT WEILL / MAXWELL ANDERSON

LOST IN THE STARS

2015

Starring Eric Owens Fresh Food Market Tuesdays -Sundays Arts & Crafts ~ Weekends easternmarket-dc.org Tu-Fr 7-7 | Sa 7-6 | Su 9-5

WHEN FAITH IS SHAKEN, THE TRUTH SHALL SET US FREE.

“NAIL-BITING AND URGENT ENTERTAINMENT!” -NBC New York

WINNER OF THE STEINBERG PLAYWRIGHT AWARD In this tragicomic fable set in 17th century India, two imperial guards forced into performing a grisly task find their friendship on the chopping block.

February 12–20 Eisenhower Theater

BY RAJIV JOSEPH DIRECTED BY JOHN VREEKE

Major support for WNO is provided by Jacqueline Badger Mars.

WNO’s season is presented with the support of Daniel and Gayle D’Aniello.

David and Alice Rubenstein are the Presenting Underwriters of WNO.

Support for Lost in the Stars is provided by Anne Kline Pohanka and Geoffrey Pohanka.

WNO acknowledges the longstanding generosity of Life Chairman Mrs. Eugene B. Casey.

General Dynamics is the Presenting Sponsor of WNO’s 2015-2016 Season.

Eric Owens’s performances as Stephen Kumalo on February 12 and 13 are underwritten by Mrs. Alexander J. Tachmindji.

This production is also funded in part by Joe and Judy Antonucci and The Kurt Weill Foundation for Music, Inc. New York, NY.

TICKETS ON SALE NOW! KENNEDY-CENTER.ORG (202) 467-4600

FEB 1—FEB 28

Tickets also available at the Box Office. Groups call (202) 416-8400.

WOOLLYMAMMOTH.NET // 202-393-3939 // #WOOLLYTAJ

WMTC City Paper Ad 1.25.indd 1

1/21/16 3:32 PM

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 31

32 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

CITYLIST

---------Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .33 Dance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 8 Theater . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 8 Film . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .41

SearCh LISTIngS aT waShIngTonCITYpaper.Com

12

IN LOVELAND

TANYA TUCKER Fairground 16 JACKIE GREENE Saints 18 THE MARSHALL TUCKER BAND 15

birChmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Will Downing. 7:30 p.m. $75. birchmere.com.

saturday Rock

blaCk CaT 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490.

Escort, Coup Savage and the Snips. 9 p.m. $15. blackcatdc.com. dC9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. AMFMS, The Lovebug Junkies. 9:30 p.m. $10–$12. dcnine.com.

Winter Tour 2016 Songs for All Our Times

Patty TAB BENOIT Reese 14 BURLESQUE-A-PADES

Funk & R&B

dC9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Discnotheque with DJs Bill Spieler and Sean Morris. 10:30 p.m. $2–$5. dcnine.com.

Winter Tour 2016

13

roCk & roll hoTel 1353 H St. NE. (202) 388ROCK. The Escape Artist, Drop Electric, Caustic Casanova, Boon. 8:30 p.m. $12. rockandrollhoteldc.com.

blaCk CaT baCkSTage 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Dark & Stormy with DJ Shea Van Horn. 10 p.m. $5. blackcatdc.com.

7pm

EL DeBARGE PHIL VASSAR

11

howard TheaTre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

Stratosphere All-Stars with Haley Jane and Turbo Suit. 8 p.m. $20–$25. thehowardtheatre.com.

dJ nights

“ROAM Through Time!”

All 1/24 Tix Honored

10

The hamilTon 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Rayland Baxter, Margaret Glaspy. 8:30 p.m. $10–$15. thehamiltondc.com.

boSSa biSTro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Selassie i Sound. 10 p.m. $5. bossadc.com.

DAVID CASSIDY Rock of Ages Music

w/Curtis JAMES McMURTRY McMurtry 4 The STANLEY CLARKE BAND 8&9 TOMMY EMMANUEL “It’s Never Too Late Tour”

gypSy Sally’S 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700. Eat Yer Meat, BJ and the Uptown Girls. 9 p.m. $10–$12. gypsysallys.com.

WoRld

WILL DOWNING

3

Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. B-2. 8 p.m. $65. fillmoresilverspring.com.

mr. henry’S 601 Pennsylvania Ave. SE. (202) 5468412. Chuck Holden. 8 p.m. Free. mrhenrysdc.com.

KELLY WILLIS & RADIO RANCH

Feb 1

9:30 Club 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. Super Diamond. 8 p.m. $25. 930.com.

kennedy CenTer TerraCe gallery 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. René Marie. 7 p.m. & 9 p.m. $45. kennedy-center.org.

28

31

Rock

Jazz

Jan

29

Friday

u STreeT muSiC hall 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. &ME, Adam Port, DJ Lisa Frank. 10 p.m. $12. ustreetmusichall.com.

For entire schedule go to Birchmere.com Find us on Facebook/Twitter!

Tix @ Ticketmaster.com 800-745-3000 Celebrate 25th Anniversary of “Well Traveled Love”

Music

ElEctRonic

3701 Mount Vernon Ave. Alexandria, VA • 703-549-7500

JUNIOR BROWN

19

CAMERON ESPOSITO

Head to comedian Cameron Esposito’s show at the Kennedy Center this weekend and you just might end up getting some self-defense tips as well. In a clip from her upcoming special Marriage Material, she recommends sleeping with a pillow on one’s chest, thereby preventing a potential stabbing from an intruder. Protection from stranger danger aside, expect Esposito to be ready with material from her life as a newlywed (she married fellow comedian Rhea Butcher, who happens to be her opening act on this mini tour, late last year) as well as her takes on politics and current events. The really interesting dirt will come if Esposito chooses to discuss her role in Garry Marshall’s upcoming ensemble comedy, Mother’s Day. If it’s anywhere close to as hokey as its spiritual predecessors Valentine’s Day and New Year’s Eve, Esposito’s reports from the set will be twice as entertaining as what’s on the screen.

Cameron Esposito performs with Rhea Butcher at 6 p.m. at the Kennedy Center Terrace Theater, —Caroline Jones 2700 F St. NW. Free. (202)467-4600. kennedy-center.org.

Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. Several Species: The PINK FLOYD Experience. 8 p.m. $20. fillmoresilverspring.com. gypSy Sally’S 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

On the Bus, The Beat Hotel, Ten Feet Tall. 9 p.m. $12–$14. gypsysallys.com.

The hamilTon 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Howie Day, Anna Rose. 8:30 p.m. $18.75–$25.25. thehamiltondc.com. roCk & roll hoTel 1353 H St. NE. (202) 388ROCK. The Record Company, The Jones. 8 p.m. $12. rockandrollhoteldc.com.

JEFFREY OSBORNE Jefferson 22 LEON RUSSELL Grizzard 23 THE ROBERT CRAY BAND 24 JOE PUG 25 ALTAN 26 FIREFALL & PURE PRAIRIE LEAGUE 27 THE FOUR BITCHIN’ BABES 21

CITY LIGHTS: FRIDAY

28 An

Evening of Musical & Political Humor with MARK RUSSELL

GAELIC STORM Mar 2 WYNONNA & The Big Noise “Stories & Song”

29&30

3&4

Funk & R&B birChmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Will Downing. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) birchmere.com. howard TheaTre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

Elle Varner. 7:30 p.m. $30–$65. thehowardtheatre.com.

ElEctRonic u STreeT muSiC hall 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. Feed Me Disco with Eau Claire, Citizen Select, The Golden Pony. 10 p.m. $10. ustreetmusichall.com.

RACHELLE FERRELL

5 HARMONY

SWEEPSTAKES A CAPELLA FESTIVAL 2016

11

JESSE COOK LEO KOTTKE KATHY MATTEA

13

Jerry Douglas Presents

14

LIZZ WRIGHT

8 10

EARLS OF LEICESTER

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 33

CITY LIGHTS: SATURDAY KENNEDY CENTER

Jason Moran, Artistic Director for Jazz

2015–2016 Season

Frank Wess Tribute Saturday, January 30

KC Jazz Club • Performances at 7 & 9 p.m. in the Terrace Gallery.

No minimum. Light menu fare available.

Christian McBride

Mack Avenue SuperBand

featuring Gary Burton and Christian McBride Friday, February 5 at 7 & 9 p.m.

Terrace Theater

Beginning in the 1960s, D.C. resident Chris Earnshaw took many Polaroid and Instamatic photos: of his town, of buildings facing wrecking balls and people on the streets, of blue collar workers, and of an Andy Warhol book signing. More recently, Joe Mills, staff photographer at Georgetown’s Dumbarton Oaks Museum, was wowed by the handfuls of rubber-band-bound old photos Earnshaw brought him. Mills has now digitized, enlarged, and framed 59 of these images; they are on display at the Carnegie Library along with some original Polaroids, bricks from demolished buildings, and newspaper clippings, all collected by Earnshaw.

Coverage of Earnshaw, who calls himself the Cowboy Poet, has focused on his struggle with bipolar disorder, troubled childhood, financial problems, and experience being homeless. None of that should distract from his photos. While most of them may not rival the street shots of his photographic idols like Walker Evans, New Orleans’ Clarence Laughlin, and Frenchman Eugène Atget, photos like “House of Prayer,” featuring a woman waiting for a bus in front of a gospel show poster on a deteriorating wall, demonstrate a clever eye. Chris Earnshaw speaks at noon at the Carnegie Library at Mount Vernon Square, 801 K St. NW. Free; regis—Steve Kiviat tration requested. (202) 249-3955. dchistory.org.

Jazz Discovery Artist in the KC Jazz Club

Matthew Whitaker Friday, February 12

KC Jazz Club • Performances at 7 & 9 p.m. in the Terrace Gallery.

No minimum. Light menu fare available.

Discovery Artists in the KC Jazz Club are supported by The King-White Family Foundation and Dr. J. Douglas White.

A Family Affair

The Whitfield Family Band

Saturday, February 13 Mark Whitfield

“DISTRICT”

KC Jazz Club • Performances at 7 & 9 p.m. in the Terrace Gallery.

No minimum. Light menu fare available.

This performance is made possible through the generous support of The William N. Cafritz Jazz Initiative.

WPFW 89.3 FM is a media partner of Kennedy Center Jazz.

TICKETS ON SALE NOW! KENNEDY-CENTER.ORG (202) 467-4600 Tickets also available at the Box Office. Groups call (202) 416-8400.

kennedy CenTer TerraCe gallery 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Frank Wess Tribute with Scott Robinson. 7 p.m. & 9 p.m. $30–$39. kennedy-center.org. mr. henry’S 601 Pennsylvania Ave. SE. (202) 5468412. Diane Daly. 8 p.m. Free. mrhenrysdc.com.

go-go howard TheaTre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

All-Star Birthday Bash with Team Familiar, Sugar Bear, and DJ Amp C. 11:30 p.m. $25–$70. thehowardtheatre.com.

classical kennedy CenTer millennium STage 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. National Symphony Orchestra Prelude. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

dJ nights 9:30 Club 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. No Scrubs: ‘90s Dance Party with DJs Will Eastman and Brian Billion. 9 p.m. (Sold out) 930.com. blaCk CaT baCkSTage 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Bae Bae: A K-Pop Dance Night with DJs Dakdahri and Chimek. 10 p.m. $5. blackcatdc.com. roCk & roll hoTel 1353 H St. NE. (202) 388ROCK. David Bowie Tribute with The Metaphysical.

9:30 p.m. Free. rockandrollhoteldc.com.

sunday Rock

birChmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. David Cassidy. 7:30 p.m. $49.50. birchmere.com. blaCk CaT 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Matt Corby, Overcoats. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) blackcatdc.com.

34 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. Reel Big Fish, Suburban Legends, The Maxies. 8 p.m. $22.50. fillmoresilverspring.com.

WoRld boSSa biSTro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

The Fourth Stream. 9 p.m. Free. bossadc.com.

classical kennedy CenTer ConCerT hall 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Orchestre National de France. 4 p.m. $55–$120. kennedy-center.org.

Monday Rock

galaxy huT 2711 Wilson Blvd., Arlington. (703) 525-8646. Valerie Kuehne & the Wasps Nests, Lost Civilizations. 9 p.m. $5. galaxyhut.com.

classical kennedy CenTer millennium STage 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. NSO Youth Fellows. 6 p.m.

Free. kennedy-center.org.

tuesday Rock

blaCk CaT baCkSTage 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Emily Wells, Lorna Dune. 7:30 p.m. $12. blackcatdc.com.

hip-hop Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. Mike Stud, Jett Jetchubetcha, OCD: Moosh & Twist, Futuristic, Arizona Zervas. 8 p.m. $15.50. fillmoresilverspring.com.

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 35

opERa

Jazz

kennedy CenTer TerraCe TheaTer 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Opera Lafayette presents Chabrier’s “Une Éducation Manquée”. 7 p.m. $50–$110. kennedy-center.org.

kennedy CenTer millennium STage 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Daniela Schächter. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

Vocal kennedy CenTer millennium STage 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Duke Ellington School of the Arts Show Choir. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

countRy birChmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. James McMurtry, Curtis McMurtry.

7:30 p.m. $29.50. birchmere.com.

Wednesday

WoRld

blaCk CaT baCkSTage 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Young Galaxy, Dais. 7:30 p.m. $12. blackcatdc.com.

opERa

Rock

dC9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Martin Courtney, EZTV. 9 p.m. $14–$16. dcnine.com.

Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. Ryan Bingham, Bird Dog. 8 p.m. $25. fillmoresilverspring.com. gypSy Sally’S 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

Tom Constanten and Anthem String Quartet, Black Muddy River Band. 8 p.m. $12. gypsysallys.com.

Funk & R&B The hamilTon 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Lianne La Havas. 8 p.m. $25–$35. thehamiltondc.com. howard TheaTre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

Vaughn Benjamin and the Akae Beka Band. 9 p.m. $20–$50. thehowardtheatre.com.

ElEctRonic 9:30 Club 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. Destructo, Justin Martin, Rezz. 9 p.m. $20. 930.com.

boSSa biSTro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Orchester Prazevica’s Gypsy Soul Party. 9:30 p.m.

Free. bossadc.com.

kennedy CenTer TerraCe TheaTer 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Opera Lafayette presents Chabrier’s “Une Éducation Manquée”. 7 p.m. $50–$110. kennedy-center.org.

thursday Rock

dC9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Lookout Gang, District Sky Punch, Menage a Garage. 8:30 p.m. $8. dcnine.com.

Fillmore Silver Spring 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. Marianas Trench, Mainland. 8 p.m. $25–$30. fillmoresilverspring.com. gypSy Sally’S 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

Micro Massive, Bunny Man Bridge. 8 p.m. $8. gypsysallys.com.

The hamilTon 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Dr. John and the Nite Trippers. 8:30 p.m. $59–$82. thehamiltondc.com.

CITY LIGHTS: SUNDAY

A MIDSUMMER NIGHT’S DREAM Filled with star-crossed lovers and higgledypiggledy pairings, scrambled intentions and jumbled jealousies, the Folger’s latest production invites audiences to see how “quick bright things come to confusion” on one summer evening. Four-time Helen Hayes Award winner Aaron Posner launches the theater’s yearlong commemoration of the 400th anniversary of Shakespeare’s death with an innovative new production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream.

His interpretation embraces the play’s comedy, allowing the actors to bring some silliness to their roles. Andre Pluess’ original score accompanies the vengeful fairy king Oberon and the mischievous Puck, played by Erin Weaver, as they wreak havoc on the lives of unsuspecting mortals. With a rollicking rock number and an endearing ukulele song written by Adam Wesley Brown, who also plays Lysander, the show’s music is as rich as the story. Overlapping narratives, a human who transforms into a donkey, and a play of “tragical mirth” set within the play itself—which may just be a dream—make for a hilarious journey of misunderstanding and deception. Beneath the surface-level absurdity, we also glimpse a rather telling portrait of our everyday emotional entanglements, especially when it comes to the ones we love. The play runs Jan. 26 to March 6 at the Folger Elizabethan Theatre, 201 East —Victoria Gaffney Capitol St. SE. $35–$75. (202) 544-7077. folger.edu.

36 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

I.M.P. PRESENTS Merriweather Post Pavilion • Columbia, MD

JUST ANNOUNCED!

KENNY CHESNEY w/ Old Dominion .................................. MAY 19

THIS WEEK’S SHOWS

On Sale Friday, January 29 at 10am

Josh Abbott Band w/ Carly Pearce ................................................................ Th JAN 28 Super Diamond The Ultimate Neil Diamond Tribute................................... F 29 BLURRED PRESENTS: SHIP2SHIP TOUR FEATURING Destructo & Justin Martin w/ Rezz ............................................................. W FEB 3

ModEst MousE / Brand nEW On Sale Friday, January 29 at Noon R ALL FOUR SHOWS!

LAWN TIX COMBO ONLY $150 FO

FEBRUARY

FEB 6 SOLD OUT! ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Greensky Bluegrass (Th 4 - w/ Horseshoes and Hand Grenades • F 5 - w/ Cris Jacobs) ..................Th 4 • F 5 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Joe Russo’s Almost Dead ............................................................................W 10

Big Head Todd and the Monsters w/ Mike Doughty ................................Th 11 Graveyard w/ Spiders Early Show! 6pm Doors ................................................F 12 STEEZ PROMO PRESENTS SNAILIN USA TOUR PT. 2 FEATURING

Snails w/ Must Die ...........................................................................................F 12 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

The Devil Makes Three w/ Langhorne Slim ................................... Sa 13 & Su 14

Best Coast & Wavves w/ Cherry Glazerr ......................................................Tu 16 Unknown Mortal Orchestra w/ Lower Dens .................................................W 17 Ralphie May This is a seated show. Early Show! 6pm Doors ..........................Th 18 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

The Soul Rebels Sound System feat. Talib Kweli Late Show! 10pm Doors . Th 18 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Anders Osborne w/ Amy Helm and The Handsome Strangers ........................F 19 T ADDED!

FEB 23 SOLD OUT! SECOND NIGH

Josh Ritter and The Royal City Band w/ Elephant Revival ..........................W 24 Ty Segall and The Muggers w/ CFM ............................................................Th 25

JASON ALDEAN w/ Thomas Rhett and more! ....................MAY 7 KENNY CHESNEY .............................................................MAY 19 MIRANDA LAMBERT ................................................ AUGUST 25 WPOC WEEKEND IN THE COUNTRY ...................... DATE TBA

Buy one ticket, attend four shows. Sit in the same seat each show!

Discounted total price vs. buying separately. Don’t get shut out by the sellouts.

Grab your spot in the front of the line now! Yee haw!

Jason Aldean w/ Thomas Rhett • A Thousand Horses • Dee Jay Silver .. MAY 7 Twenty One Pilots .....................................................................JUNE 10 Ellie Goulding ........................................................................................... JUNE 13 Tame Impala w/ M83 ............................................................................. JUNE 16 The Cure w/ The Twilight Sad .......................................................................... JUNE 22 • For full lineups and more info, visit merriweathermusic.com • 930.com

U STREET MUSIC HALL PRESENTS

Madeon w/ Skylar Spence .............................................................................Su 21

Verizon Center • Washington D.C.

THIS MONDAY!

MUSE w/ X Ambassadors ............................................................FEBRUARY 1 Ticketmaster

ALL GOOD AND DALE’S PALE ALE PRESENT

Echostage • Washington, D.C.

Steep Canyon Rangers Early Show! 7pm Doors ...........................................F 26 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

BoomBox Late Show! 10pm Doors ..................................................................F 26 STEEZ PROMO PRESENTS

The Floozies w/ Russ Liquid & Sunsquabi ....................................................Sa 27

Editors ............................................................................................................Su 28

MARCH Wolfmother w/ Deap Vally ............................................................................... W 2 Drive-By Truckers w/ Thayer Sarrano ...................................................F 4 & Sa 5 Ra Ra Riot ....................................................................................................... Su 6 Miike Snow w/ Beau ......................................................................................... W 9

.......... JULY 12

Kid Cudi All 12/10 tickets will be honored. ............................................... FEBRUARY 11 Umphrey’s McGee w/ Tauk ........................................................... FEBRUARY 12 Coheed and Cambria

w/ Glassjaw • I the Mighty • Silver Snakes ..................................................................... MARCH 2

Logic w/ Dizzy Wright ............................................................................................... MARCH 31 2135 Queens Chapel Rd. NE • Ticketmaster

ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Twiddle w/ LITZ.............................................................................................Th 10 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Railroad Earth .................................................................................. F 11 & Sa 12

Rachel Platten w/ Eric Hutchinson .................................................................M 14 Brian Fallon and The Crowes .....................................................................Tu 15 Goldlink X Sango ...........................................................................................W 16 Cowboy Mouth w/ Dingleberry Dynasty .........................................................Th 17 Galactic w/ The Bright Light Social Hour ............................................. F 18 & Sa 19

JUST ANNOUNCED!

1215 U Street NW Washington, D.C.

JEWEL

.............................................................................................. APRIL 7 On Sale Friday, January 29 at 10am

STORY DISTRICT’S

Sucker For Love ....................................................................................FEBRUARY 13

ALL GOOD PRESENTS

AEG PRESENTS

AEG LIVE PRESENTS

Laurie Berkner Band ...........................................................................FEBRUARY 28 Pat Green & Randy Rogers Band......................................................... MARCH 3 Vicente Amigo ................................................................................................. MARCH 6 Yamato - The Drummers of Japan ......................................................... MARCH 16 Natalia Lafourcade All 10/22 tickets will be honored. .............................. MARCH 24 Joe Satriani .........................................................................................................APRIL 2 Welcome to Night Vale ....................................................................... APRIL 18 & 19

Lake Street Dive w/ Margaret Glaspy ..........................................................Tu 22 Pusha T ..........................................................................................................W 23

MANY MORE SHOWS ON SALE!

9:30 CUPCAKES

930.com

The best thing you could possibly put in your mouth Cupcakes by BUZZ... your neighborhood bakery in Alexandria, VA. | www.buzzonslaters.com

9:30 CLUB PRESENTS AT U STREET MUSIC HALL SafetySuit w/ Connell Cruise .............. Tu 16 Jonny Grave and The Tombstones • Kat Dahlia ............................................ W 17 Footwerk • Park Like It’s and more! .. Tu 9 Vinyl Theatre & Finish Ticket Hey Marseilles w/ Bad Bad Hats .......... F 12 w/ Irontom ........................................... Tu 23 MARDI GRAS CARNIVALE FEATURING

R5 w/ Ryland & Parade of Lights ...................................................................FEBRUARY 23

93.9 WKYS AND MAJIC 102.3 PRESENT

Plastic Cup Boyz .............................................................................................. MAY 29 • thelincolndc.com • U Street (Green/Yellow) stop across the street!

• Buy advance tickets at the 9:30 Club box office

Tickets for 9:30 Club shows are available through TicketFly.com, by phone at 1-877-4FLY-TIX, and at the 9:30 Club box office.

9:30 CLUB BOX OFFICE HOURS are 12-7PM Weekdays & Until 11PM on show nights. 6-11PM on Sat & 6-10:30PM on Sun on show nights.

9:30 CUPCAKES The best thing you could possibly put in your mouth.

Cupcakes by BUZZ... your neighborhood bakery in Alexandria, VA. www.buzzbakery.com

PARKING: THE OFFICIAL 9:30 parking lot entrance is on 9th Street, directly behind the 9:30 club. Buy your advance parking tickets at the same time as your concert tickets!

HAPPY HOUR DRINK PRICES

AFTER THE SHOW AT THE BACK BAR!

930.com

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 37

CITY LIGHTS: MONDAY

“BODY OF DEVOTION: THE COSMIC BUDDHA IN 3D” A 6th-century image of the Buddha covered in narrative scenes and images has been a part of the Freer Gallery of Art’s collection since 1923 and featured in many exhibitions over the course of nearly a century. With the Freer closed for renovations until 2017, much of its Chinese Buddhist sculpture collection will be off view, but the so-called Cosmic Buddha is getting an exhibition of its very own. Every inch of the headless sculpture, which represents the Buddhist concept of emptiness, has been digitized since 2011, allowing researchers to understand the intricate details carved into its surface, which are meant to represent spiritual emanations. Now the general public can closely examine it as well; from ink rubbings to a flat map of the sculpture’s surface, visitors will be able to closely examine its messages clearly for the first time. The new exhibition also teaches lessons about digitization technology and art preservation. Who knows how art will be examined 15 centuries from now? The exhibition is on view daily, 10 a.m. to 5:30 p.m., at the Arthur M. Sackler Gallery, 1050 Independence Ave. SW. Free. (202) 633-4880. asia.si.edu. —Caroline Jones

JANUARY SATURAY, JANUARY 30

AN EVENING WITH BILAL

FEBRUARY F 12, S 13 & SU 14

JEFF BRADSHAW & ERIC ROBERSON A LOVER’S WEEKEND RETURN OF THE GENTLEMEN FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 26

RAHSAAN PATTERSON

S 27

JOE CLAIR & FRIENDS COMEDY SHOW MARCH

TH 10 & F 11

KENNY LATTIMORE THURSDAY MARCH 24 + FRIDAY MARCH 25

AN EVENING WITH LALAH HATHAWAY

APRIL

kennedy CenTer millennium STage 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Jamie McLean Band. 6 p.m.

Free. kennedy-center.org.

ElEctRonic u STreeT muSiC hall 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. Hector, Citizenn, Pirate Copy, Pete Zorba. 10 p.m. $5–$15. ustreetmusichall.com.

Jazz birChmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Stanley Clarke Band. 7:30 p.m. $49.50. birchmere.com.

countRy 9:30 Club 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. Greensky Bluegrass. 7 p.m. $23. 930.com. mr. henry’S 601 Pennsylvania Ave. SE. (202) 5468412. Notes from the Underground. 8 p.m. Free. mrhenrysdc.com.

WoRld boSSa biSTro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Feedel Band. 9:30 p.m. $10. bossadc.com.

FRIDAY, APRIL 22

CAMEO

7719 Wisconsin Ave., Bethesda, MD (240) 330-4500

C 2014 7GROUP ENTERTAINMENT

WWW.CAMEONATION.COM FACEBOOK.COM/CAMEONATION TWITTER.COM/CAMEONATION INSTAGRAM.COM/CAMEONATION

(305) 460-8022

Two Blocks from Bethesda Metro/Red Line Free Parking on Weekends 38 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

hip-hop howard TheaTre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

Arrested Development. 9 p.m. $25–$60. thehowardtheatre.com.

dance

alvin ailey ameriCan danCe TheaTer The African-American dance company, under the direction of Robert Battle, performs pieces by choreographers Ronald K. Brown, Judith Jamison, Rennie Harris, and Paul Taylor. Kennedy Center Opera House. 2700 F St. NW. Feb. 2, 7 p.m.; Feb. 3, 7 p.m.; Feb. 4, 7 p.m. $49–$199. 202-467-4600. kennedy-center.org.

ameriCan balleT TheaTre The New York-based company performs a new production of The Sleeping Beauty choreographed by artist-in-residence Alexei Ratmansky. Recently promoted principal dancer Misty Copeland appears as Princess Florine.

Kennedy Center Opera House. 2700 F St. NW. Jan. 29, 7 p.m.; Jan. 30, 7 p.m.; Jan. 30, 1 p.m.; Jan. 31, 1 p.m.; Jan. 31, 6:30 p.m. $49–$299. 202-467-4600. kennedy-center.org. lighT SwiTCh danCe TheaTre The group presents NEST: every human deserves a home, a new work by Sandra Atkinson that examines the idea of “home” and what it means to have one or not through movement, visual art, film, and music. At each performance, the company will collect donations for homeless service organizations. VisArts. 155 Gibbs St., Rockville. Jan. 29, 8 p.m.; Jan. 31, 2 p.m. $10.

(301) 315-8200. visartsatrockville.org.

theater

agenTS oF azeroTh The Washington Rogues present this new work based on Edward Snowden’s revelation that NSA and CIA agents spent much time and money investigating World of Warcraft online communities. The company wonders what the agents found and question the surveillance of our online activity in Jennifer Lane’s new play. Flashpoint Mead Theatre Lab. 916 G St. NW. To Feb. 14. $15–$20. (202) 315-1306. culturaldc.org. beTween riverSide and Crazy A disgruntled ex-cop battles to keep an enormous rent-controlled apartment and put down his demons in this dark, Pulitzer Prize-winning comedy from author Stephen Adly Guirgis, whose previous play, The Motherfucker with the Hat played to acclaim at Studio three seasons ago. Studio Theatre. 1501 14th St. NW. To Feb. 28. $20–$86. (202) 332-3300. studiotheatre.org.

The CiTy oF ConverSaTion In this play tailor fit for D.C., a Georgetown hostess crafts political alliances and faces off with foes from the comforts of her living room, only to have her world rocked by the

arrival of her son’s conservative wife. Doug Hughes directs the area premiere of Anthony Giardina’s comedy. Arena Stage. 1101 6th St. SW. To March 6. $55–$90. (202) 488-3300. arenastage.org.

The CriTiC and The real inSpeCTor hound Shakespeare Theatre Company opens 2016 with two plays in one evening, both behind-the-scenes looks at life in the theater. Jeffrey Hatcher’s adaptation of Richard Brinsley Sheridan’s 18th-century comedy The Critic is followed by Tom Stoppard’s The Real Inspector Hound, a mystery about two critics who become suspects when they see a murderous play. Lansburgh Theatre. 450 7th St. NW. To Feb. 14. $20–$108. (202) 547-1122. shakespearetheatre.org. equuS A troubled young man’s obsession with horses turns violent and a dedicated psychiatrist attempts to figure out how to treat the situation in this dark drama by Peter Shaffer. Constellation Theatre at Source. 1835 14th St. NW. To Feb. 14. $20–$45. (202) 204-7741. constellationtheatre.org.

FaTher ComeS home From The war (parTS i, ii, and iii) Suzan-Lori Parks’ play follows a slave from his West Texas home to the Confederate battlefields. To deepen the emotion of the work, Parks incorporates plot elements from ancient Greek dramas into this messy and powerful work. Round House Theatre Bethesda. 4545 East-West Highway, Bethesda. To Feb. 21. $36–$66. (240) 644-1100. roundhousetheatre.org.

a genTleman’S guide To love and murder In this Tony-winning musical, a distant heir to a family fortune aims to claim it by “eliminating” the eight members who stand in his way. Kennedy Center Eisenhower Theater. 2700 F St. NW. To Jan. 30. $64–$229. (202) 467-4600. kennedy-center.org. georgie: my advenTureS wiTh george roSe Actor Ed Dixon remembers his friendship with actor George Rose, known for his roles in My Fair Lady and The Mystery of Edwin Drood, in this one-man show that has Dixon playing dozens of different characters. Signature Theatre. 4200 Campbell Ave., Arlington. To Feb. 7. $25–$45. (703) 820-9771. sigtheatre.org.

The glaSS menagerie Ford’s presents Tennessee Williams’ dark drama about Amanda, a mother trying to create a suitable life for her dependent adult children. When a suitor arrives to meet her shy daughter, Maggie, Amanda must figure out how to connect reality with her dreams for her family. Ford’s Theatre. 511 10th St. NW. To Feb. 21. $20–$62.

(202) 347-4833. fordstheatre.org. guardS aT The Taj Two guards tasked with overseeing the completion of the Taj Mahal are assigned to complete something so gruesome that it will alter their lives and relationship for years to come in this tragicomedy from playwright Rajiv Joseph. Woolly Mammoth Theatre. 641 D St. NW. To Feb. 28. $43–$68. (202) 393-3939. woollymammoth.net.

1811 14TH ST NW

www.blackcatdc.com @blackcatdc

JAN / FEB SHOWS FRI 29 FRI 29 SAT 30 SAT 30

AWKWARD SEX

...AND THE CITY DARK & STORMY DANCE / ELECTRO / RETRO

ESCORT

COUP SAUVAGE & THE SNIPS

BAE BAE

A K-POP DANCE NIGHT

SUN 31 MATT CORBY / SOLD OUT MON 1 DOCTOR FOECHUCKLE’S

MARIJUANA MONDAYS SEED GIVEAWAY RAFFLE / FILM

TUE 2 WED 3 FRI 5

SAT 6 FRI 12 SAT 13 SUN 14 TUE 16

EMILY WELLS YOUNG GALAXY

ELLIE QUINN PRESENTS:

LIP SYNC BATTLE BURLESQUE (18+) COMEDY’S BEST KEPT SECRET TOUR

CHURCH NIGHT

VOIVOD

PROTOMARTYR PRIESTS

CHUCK RAGAN

CITY LIGHTS: TUESDAY

THE GLASS MENAGERIE “...I am the opposite of a stage magician. He gives you illusion that has the appearance of truth. I give you truth in the pleasant disguise of illusion,” says Tom at the beginning of Tennessee Williams’ The Glass Menagerie, the playwright’s semi-autobiographical tale of the Wingfield family: Amanda, the faded Southern matriarch clinging desperately to her past in the face of an uncertain future; Laura, the debilitatingly shy daughter who suffers from a disability; and Tom, the unhappy son who drifts between his present escape and hazy memories of their St. Louis apartment. Tom serves as a stand-in for Williams, whose own beloved, schizophrenic sister, Rose, lived most of her life in institutions after undergoing a prefrontal lobotomy. Seventy years later, the “memory play,” as Williams called it, remains a pillar of American theater—an examination of family, obligation, vulnerability, and fear in post-Depression America. It’s also a play with gloriously exacting stage directions, which makes staging a difficult task. (A photograph of the long-absent father is described thusly: “He is gallantly smiling, ineluctably smiling, as if to say, ‘I will be smiling forever.’”) Mark Ramont’s production at Ford’s Theatre is simply staged, perfectly lit, and passionately acted. The play’s tragic end won’t be a surprise to most patrons, but the path is still as painful as it was when I first read it in 10th grade.

The play runs Jan. 22 to Feb. 21 at Ford’s Theatre, 511 10th St. NW. $20–$62. (202) 347—Sarah Anne Hughes 4833. fords.org.

ESCORT VOIVOD

SAT JAN 30 SAT FEB 13

TAKE METRO!

WE ARE LOCATED 3 BLOCKS FROM THE U STREET/CARDOZO STATION

TO BUY TICKETS VISIT TICKETFLY.COM washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 39

LIVE

UPCOMING PERFORMANCES

RAYLAND

BAXTER

W/ MARGARET GLASPY

tHursday, January 28 too mucH For todd

FRIDAY JAN

1950’s through modern day covers

HOWIE

Friday, January 29 camino royale

DAY

rock ‘n roll revelry!

saturday, January 30 swamP Poodle

SATURDAY JAN WED, FEB 3

tuesday, February 2

AN EXCLUSIVE BLOOD SOLO PERFORMANCE

wednesday, February 3 oPen mic niGHt oPen Hosted by PHil KominsKi open to all musicians!

tHursday, February 4 last sentry

introspective, upbeat and funky rock

Friday, February 5 cravin’ doGs gonzo folk rock

saturday, February 6 andrew deerin

I missed the boat on Lianne La Havas, and I have no excuse. Since 2011, the British singer has released two critically acclaimed albums and been featured on NPR and Pitchfork.

She’s performed with Bon Iver, Alicia Keys, and Prince. Her latest recording, Blood, is up for Best Urban Contemporary Album at this year’s Grammy Awards. Yet the first time I saw her name was scrolling through a list of upcoming concerts. Better late than never.

La Havas’ voice immediately captured my attention. Pure, smooth, delicate, full, it’s deserving of more adjectives than there is time or space for. One moment she’ll remind you of Janelle Monae, then Sade, before you second guess and think maybe Alicia Keys or Whitney or someone older like Sarah Vaughan. Hers is the kind of voice that reminds you just how rare it is to hear an exceptional singer. Hearing it and then listening to someone else is like watching Steph Curry and then watching the rest of the NBA. She’s an outlier and one that shouldn’t be missed. Lianne La Havas performs at 8 p.m. at The Hamilton, —Justin Weber 600 14th St. NW. $25–$35. (202) 787-1000. thehamiltondc.com.

30

a new and original rock opera

1st tuesdays w/ tHe dave Jacobson band

LIANNE LA HAVAS

W/ ANNA ROSE

funky rock with a zydeco twist

sunday, January 31 99: a rocK oPera

29

CITY LIGHTS: WEDNESDAY

LIANNE LA HAVAS:

SOLD OUT

THURS, FEB 4

DR. JOHN & THE NITE TRIPPERS SAT, FEB 6

DOCTOR DREAD PRESENTS: A CELEBRATION OF THE BIRTHDAY OF BOB MARLEY FEATURING ISRAEL VIBRATION WITH ZEDICUS AND DAI WATSON TUES, FEB 9

CELEBRATE FAT TUESDAY WITH

NATHAN AND THE ZYDECO CHA-CHAS

Ft. tHe devilles and blue Healer rock n’ roll

www.villainandsaint.com

THEHAMILTONDC.COM

Voting ends March 1. washingtoncitypaper.com

BEST OF 2016 OUT APRIL 7 Reserve Now! Call the advertising department to book your Best of D.C. ad today: 202-332-2100 40 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

The hiSTory boyS Eight boys at an English school prepare for their admission exams for Oxford and Cambridge in Alan Bennett’s emotional coming-ofage drama presented by Dominion Stage. Gunston Arts Center. 2700 S. Lang St., Arlington. To Jan. 30. $15–$20. (703) 228-1850. arlingtonarts.org. a midSummer nighT’S dream Favorite local actors, including Holly Twyford and Erin Weaver, appear in Aaron Posner’s new staging of Shakespeare’s magical comedy about challenged lovers, fairies, and donkeys. Folger Elizabethan Theatre.

201 E. Capitol St. SE. To March 6. $35–$75. (202) 544-7077. folger.edu. piCaSSo aT The lapin agile Steve Martin’s absurdist comedy set in a Paris cafe finds Albert Einstein and Pablo Picasso interacting right before both of them become important figures in the science and art worlds. Meeting crazy bystanders as they discuss the events of the world, the two icons become humanized and silly in Martin’s play. Keegan Theatre at Church Street Theater. 1742 Church St. NW. To Feb. 13. $30–$40. (703) 892-0202. keegantheatre.com.

SeñoriTa y madame: The SeCreT war oF elizabeTh arden and helena rubinSTein Gustavo Ott’s comedy about dueling women at the heads of the marketing and cosmetics world and the conflicts that impact their careers is brought to life

by Consuelo Trum. GALA Hispanic Theatre. 3333 14th St. NW. To Feb. 28. $20–$42. (202) 234-7174. galatheatre.org.

Shake looSe: a muSiCal nighT oF blueS, moodS, and iConS This new revue pays tribute to Thomas Jones II, William Knowles, and William Hubbard, the composers of popular musicals, like Three Sistahs, Bessie’s Blues, and Harlem Rose, that have previously been hits at MetroStage. MetroStage.

1201 N. Royal St., Alexandria. To March 6. $55–$60.

(703) 548-9044. metrostage.org.

The SiSTerS roSenSweig Three sisters come together to celebrate a birthday and reconnect after being apart in this classic comedy by Wendy Wasserstein. Theater J. 1529 16th St. NW. To Feb. 21. $27–$57. (202) 518-9400. theaterj.org.

ST. niCholaS A mad theater critic follows an actress to London with disastrous results but somehow connects with a vampire eager to offer him a new job opportunity in this ridiculous comedy from playwright Conor McPherson. Washington Stage Guild at Undercroft Theatre. 900 Massachusetts Ave. NW. To Feb. 21. $40–$50. (240) 582-0050. stageguild.org.

STone Tape parTy The winner of the 2014 Capital Fringe Festival’s “Best Comedy” award returns to the stage, this time at Atlas. In this wild event that combines sex, drugs, and ghosts, a woman tries to leave her wild past behind but the house in which she lives has other ideas. Atlas Performing Arts Center. 1333 H St. NE. To Feb. 7. $30. (202) 399-7993. atlasarts.org.

SweaT Arena Stage presents the world premiere of Lynn Nottage’s play about factory life at the turn of the 21st century. When workers in one Pennsylvania

town hear rumors of layoffs and encounter a horrific crime, each character must figure out how to move forward when the future seems uncertain. Arena Stage. 1101 6th St. SW. To Feb. 21. $55–$110. (202) 488-3300. arenastage.org. when The rain STopS Falling Michael Dove directs this production of Andrew Bovell’s family drama that spans multiple generations and locations to tell the story of fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, and the events that happen over the course of 80 years. 1st Stage. 1524 Spring Hill Road, McLean. To Feb. 28. $15–$30. (703) 854-1856.

1ststagespringhill.org.

FilM

The 5Th wave After alien attacks destroy much of the Earth, a young woman must do everything she can to save her brother. Chloë Grace Moretz stars in this science fiction thriller based on the novel by Rick Yancey. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information) dirTy grandpa Robert De Niro and Zac Efron star in this lewd comedy about a young man who, on the eve of his wedding, must drive his grandfather to Florida for spring break. Jason Manzoukas and Aubrey Plaza co-star. (See washingtoncitypaper. com for venue information)

ShadeS oF blaCk Marlon Wayans stars n inFiFTy this parody of Fifty Shades of Grey, in which an inexperienced student and an eccentric businessman begin a torrid affair. Co-starring Kali Hawk, Jane Seymour, and Mike Epps. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information) FineST hourS Coast Guard officers must n The rescue the crews of two oil tankers caught in a nor’easter in this film based on the true story of the 1952 Pendleton rescue. Starring Chris Pine, Casey Affleck, and Eric Bana. (See washingtoncitypaper. com for venue information) jane goT a gun A woman must defend her family and turns to a former lover for help after a bloody gang pursues her husband in this Western directed by Gavin O’Connor. Starring Natalie Portman, Noah Emmerich, and Ewan McGregor. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information)

n

ACADEMY AWARD NOMINEE ®

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

WINNER GOLDEN GLOBE AWARD ®

©HFPA

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

“THE BEST PICTURE OF THE YEAR.” Peter Debruge, VARIETY Eric Kohn, INDIEWIRE Anne Thompson, THOMPSON ON HOLLYWOOD THE GUARDIAN

WWW.SONYCLASSICS.COM

Film clips are written by Caroline Jones.

A FILM BY LÁSZLÓ NEMES

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENTS NOW PLAYING BETHESDA SEE IT IN 35MM WASHINGTON, DC Landmark’s Landmark’s Bethesda Row Cinema E Street Cinema (202) 783-9494 (301) 652-7273

PICK

VIEW THE TRAILER AT WWW.SONOFSAULMOVIE.COM

kung Fu panda 3 Po the Panda reconnects n with his father and the overeager panda he was set up to marry at birth, while also training a corps of his fellow ursids to defend China using kung fu, in this third film in the series. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information)

SON OF SAUL

BAFTA AWARD AWARD GOLDEN GLOBE NOMINEE ®

BEST ACTRESS Maggie Smith

WASHINGTON CITY PAPER FRIDAY 01/29

“ACTING LEGEND MAGGIE SMITH’S TOUR DE FORCE.” -Lou Lumenick, NEW YORK POST FS/MA

1/8 PAGE ( 4.666" ) X 2.49"

ACADEMY AWARD® WINNER ALL.SOS.0129.WCP

#1 MAGGIE SMITH

THE

ALEX JENNINGS

IN LADYTHE VAN NICHOLAS HYTNER ALAN BENNETT FROM HIS MEMOIR

DIRECTED BY SCREENPLAY BY

WWW.SONYCLASSICS.COM

EXCLUSIVE ENGAGEMENTS NOW PLAYING

Washington, DC Fairfax Arlington AMC Bethesda LANDMARK’S LANDMARK’S E STREET CINEMA LOEWS SHIRLINGTON 7 BETHESDA ROW CINEMA ANGELIKA AT MOSAIC (202) 783-9494 (571) 512-3301 amctheatres.com (301) 652-7273

VIEW THE TRAILER AT WWW.THELADYINTHEVAN.COM

WASHINGTON CITY PAPER FRIDAY 01/29 2 COL. ( 4.666" ) X 2.49" ALL.LIV.0129.WCP

FS/MA

#1

CITY LIGHTS: THURSDAY

ALVIN AILEY AMERICAN DANCE THEATER Artistic Director Robert Battle has had five seasons to leave his mark on the performers of Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater. Although previous productions leaned traditional and slightly slow, the new works Battle’s company takes on this year meld physical experimentation with contemporary themes. Choreographer Ronald K. Brown puts Cuba in focus with “Open Door,” blending the traditions of the recently un-embargoed island with the music of Cuban-Mexican jazz composer Arturo O’Farrill. Battle pays homage to composers lost during the Nazi occupation of Europe, including Erwin Schulhoff, with “No Longer Silent,” setting a grand collective performance to Schulhoff’s “Olgelala.” In Rennie Harris’ “Exodus,” the choreographer expresses discontent with contemporary politics and taps into the “Black Lives Matter” movement by combining house and gospel music with spoken word sections. When the troupe arrives at the Kennedy Center Opera House, Battle will show it at its best. Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater performs Feb. 2 to Feb. 7 at the Kennedy Center Opera House, 2700 F St. NW. $49–$199. (202) 467-4600.

—Jordan-Marie Smith kennedy-center.org.

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 41

Contents:

Adult ..............................................42 Auto/Wheels/Boat .....................43 Buy, Sell, Trade, Marketplace.................................43 Community...................................43 Employment.................................42 Health/Mind, Body & Spirit ...............................43 Housing/Rentals .........................42 Legals Notices.............................42 Music/Music Row ......................43 Real Estate...................................42 Services........................................43

Diversions

Ink Well Crossword....................43

Adult Services

Legals

Gorgeous Asian offer sensuous full body massage.combination relaxing by soft magic touch 9am-7pm appointment only call 703-5874683 duke st.

Briya/Bridges Public Charter Schools Request for Proposals

Viagra!! 52 Pills for Only $99.00. Your #1 trusted provider for 10 years. Insured and Guaranteed Delivery. Call today 1-877621-7013

Bridges Public Charter School and Briya Public Charter School, through the Mamie D. Lee, LLC partnership herewith invite all interested parties to submit proposals to provide general contractor services for the proposed construction of a permanent facility for its subtenant Mary’s Center.

The required substantial completion date for the project September 15, 2016. The complete RFP can be obtained by contacting Bob Waechter at bw@cpmfirm.com .

RFP’s will be distributed starting on Monday, February 1st, and are due by 5:00 p.m. on Friday, February 26th.

Adult Phone Entertainment Curious About Men? Talk Discreetly with men like you! Try FREE! Call 1-888-779-2789, www.guyspyvoice.com.

Legals BRIDGES/BRIYA PCS REQUEST FOR PROPOSALS IT/SECURITY/AV SERVICES Bridges Public Charter School and Briya Public Charter School, through the Mamie D. Lee, LLC partnership, are seeking competitive proposals for an IT/Security/ AV equipment vendor to provide services to furnish and install IT/Security/AV equipment for a public charter school facility project. For a copy of the RFP, please contact Mr. Brenden Kollar of Brailsford & Dunlavey at bkollar@programmanagers.com. All proposals must be submitted by 12:00 pm on Monday, February 19, 2016.

General Contractor Services

Perry Street Prep solicits proposals for the following services: •Tutoring •Technology •Student Assessment Services Proposals shall be received no later than 5:00 P.M., Tuesday, February 9, 2016 and should be sent to psp_bids@pspdc.org.

Classified Ads

HIRE AN INTERN.

CHANGE A LIFE.

To sponsor an intern, contact Jetheda Warren, jwarren@theurbanalliance.org, 202-459-4308

Urban Alliance

empowers under-resourced youth to aspire, work, and succeed through paid internships, formal training, and mentoring. www.theurbanalliance.org

Legals

Roommates

Superior Court of the District of Columbia PROBATE DIVISION 2015 ADM 1166 MARX EDWARD ANTHONY TYREE, Deceased Notice of Appointment, Notice to Creditors And Notice to Unknown Heirs DEVERA A. HALL, whose address is 616 BRAESIDE RD, BALTIMORE, MD 21229, was appointed personal representative of the estate of MARX EDWARD ANTHONY TYREE, who died on MARCH 27, 2015 WITHOUT a Will, and will serve WITHOUT Court supervision. All unknown heirs and heirs whose whereabouts are unknown shall enter their appearance in this proceeding. Objections to such appointment shall be filed with the Register of Wills, D.C., Building A, 515 5th Street, N.W., 3rd Floor, Washington, D.C. 20001, on or before JULY 14, 2016. Claims against the decedent shall be presented to the undersigned with a copy to the Register of Wills or filed with the Register of Wills with a copy to the undersigned, on or before JULY 14, 2016, or be forever barred. Persons believed to be heirs or legatees of the decedent who do not receive a copy of this notice by mail within 25 days of its first publication shall so inform the Register of Wills, including name, address and relationship.

Date of First Publication: JAN 14, 2016. /S/ DEVERA A. HALL. TRUE TEST COPY /s/ ANNE MEISTER Register of Wills. Name of Newspapers: DWLR, WASHINGTON CITY PAPER. Pub Dates: JAN, 14, 21, 28, 2016.

ALL AREAS: ROOMMATES. COM. Lonely? Bored? Broke?

Find the perfect roommate to compliment your personality and lifestyles at Roommates.com!

Apartments for Rent

Print & Web Classified Packages may be placed on our Web site, by fax, mail, phone, or in person at our office:

Capitol Hill - Furnished bedroom with private bath in home with all amenities. Share common rooms with professional female and 3 well-behaved cats. Access to 2 subway stops. Excellent situation for interns or those on temporary assignment. $995/mo. includes utils. Avail. Feb. 1st. 202-5478095 Capitol Hill Living: Furnished Rooms for short-term and longterm rental for $1,100! Near Metro, major bus lines and Union Station - visit website for details www.TheCurryEstate.com NE DC rooms for rent. $650/mo. utils plus cable included. $400 security deposit required Close to Metro and parking available. Use of kitchen, very clean. Seeking Professional. Call 301/437-6613.

Administrative/Clerical/ Office Det Norske Veritas (U.S.A.), Inc. has multiple openings in Arlington, VA for Sr. Energy Statistical Analysts and Energy Statistical Analysts. Perform statistical modeling in evaluation of complex data sets and derivation of energy savings estimates and energy effi ciency policies/recommendations. Related degree and/or experience and/or skills required. Employer will accept university-level project experience. EEO/M/F/D/V. For more information and to apply online, visit http://www.dnvgl.com and click on “Careers.”

Business Opportunities

1400 I (EYE) Street NW Suite 900 Washington, D.C. 20005.

Commercial Ads rates start at $20 for up to 6 lines in print and online; additional print lines start at $2.50/line (vary by section).

Your print ad placement will include web placement plus up to 10 photos online.

Premium options available for both print and web may vary.

Rooms for Rent

60 MINUTES FREE TRIAL

THE HOTTEST GAY CHATLINE

Print Deadline The deadline for submission and payment of classified ads for print is each Monday, 5 pm.

You may contact the Classifieds Rep by e-mailing classifieds@washingtoncitypaper.com or calling 202-650-6926.

For more information please visit www.washingtoncitypaper.com

42 january 29, 2016 washingtoncitypaper.com

1-202-448-0091 More Local Numbers: 800-777-8000

www.guyspyvoice.com Ahora en Español/18+

Adams Morgan, Two Bedroom one bath Ground floor apt. Renovated, central AC, Washer/Dryer, DW, Microwave. Backyard. $1800 per month, water included. Text 202255-7898, or email gmehrdad@ verizon.net

PAID IN ADVANCE! Make $1000 A Week Mailing Brochures From Home! No Experience Required.

Helping home workers since 2001! Genuine Opportunity. Start Immediately! www.TheIncomeHub.com

T.

EDS DY

nci-

UPS AND FIND YOUR DOWNS OUTLET.

FIND YOUR OUTLET. RELAX, http://www.washingtonREPEAT citypaper.com/

By BreNDAN emmettUNWIND, QUigley RELAX, CLASSIFIEDS HEALTH/MIND, UNWIND, & SPIRIT 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 BODY 9 10 11 12

ng Moving?

, In st

y ds

ty-

Computer/Technical

FIND YOUR OUTLET. RELAX, UNWIND, REPEAT CLASSIFIEDS HEALTH/ MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

13

14

Find A Helping Hand Today

17

18 20

22

23

REPEAT CLASSIFIEDS HEALTH/ MIND, BODY & SPIRIT 15

19

24

25

28

33

35

36

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

52

53

54

38

39

29

48

49 56

50

59

62

63

64

1 Pres. born one mile from my house in Brookline, Mass.

4 French seasoning 7 Begins 13 Chapter 3 14 Pants that are dropped, for short 16 Hold together 17 Arabian desert nomads 19 Japanese noodle dish 20 Some deliveries 22 Locked up ypaper.com/ 24 Cheerleader’s word 25 Quatro estaciones 26 Bad outlook 28 Author St. Johns 33 Loin letters 35 Place for experimenting 36 Admit as much 37 Skyscraper transport with exactly two cars

LET. RELAX, AT CLASSIFIEDS BODY & SPIRIT

FIND A ND TODAY

he old, In with ost your listing hington City ssifieds

gtoncitypaper.com/

66

Moving?

Find A Helping Hand Today

41 “How about that!”

42 ___ of Saul (2016 Best Foreign Language front-runner) 43 Quaint word in some bar names 44 “Toodles!”

45 Insubstantial 46 Under the weather 47 Ice Cube’s group 49 Room to move 52 1962 Shirley MacLaine Robert Mitchum romcom 57 “Leave. Now!” 58 Backup for emergency startups 62 Some smokes 63 Happening infrequently 64 Chinese energy 65 Appliance time saver 66 Squeeze in barely 67 Bad spelling?

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City Paper Classifieds http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

12 Ottawa NHLers, familiarly 15 Common port type 18 Abbr. meaning way passé 21 Hammerlocked limb All proposals are to be 22 Shoe section submitted by: Friday, February 12, 2016.

23 Small lump 25 Q7 and A3, e.g.

For more information contact: Tommie McGhee at 27 Like one tmcghee@carlosrosario.org considering or Gus Viteri at or gastric banding, Out gviteri@carlosrosario.org with the old, In call (202) 797-4700. maybe with the new Post 29 “Girl U Want” http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ Miscellaneous your listing with new wavers Update your skills for a better Washington City 30 And others, in job! Continuing Education at a footnote Paper Classifieds Community College at UDC has more than a thousand certifi ed 31 With a regal flair http://www.washingtoncityonline & affordable classes in 32 Shooter Adams paper.com/ nearly every fi eld. Education on your own. http://cc.udc.edu/con34 ___ Whelan tinuing_education (Scandal character) 38 1972 Bill Withers hit 39 Vito and Fredo’s family 40 Hosiery piece 45 Where one might get pinned 48 Pull (from) 50 First name in mascara 51 Used tissue shape 52 Cumin meas.

53 Time’s sign?

54 Look at 55 The enemy 56 Silicon Valley channel 59 I, to Kraftwerk 60 Pen or dam, for one 61 Puffed cereal brand

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City Paper Classifieds

51 Moving?

Find A Helping Hand Today

58

Across

32

46

57

65

31

43

45

55

30

40

42

47

PELCO CCTV, CAMERAS, HONEY WELL DVR’S, ACTIVISION CCTV DEVICES AIPHONEINTERCOM, EMERGENCY BLUE LIGHT DEVICES, DISPLAY MONITORS, BOGEN PUBLIC ADDRESS SYSTEMS, ACCESS CONTROL, INTRUSION ALARM SYSTEMS, GATE CONTROLS AND ALL OTHER MISCELLANEOUS ELECTRONIC HARDWARE.

Hand Today

21

http://www.washingt26oncitypaper.com/ 27

34 Out with the old, In with the new 37 Post your listing with Washington 41 City Paper Classifieds 44

REQUEST FOR QUOTES SECURITYEQUIPMENT MAINTENANCE Community Capital Corporation is requesting http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ a security equipment and typaper.com/ maintenance company to service the following:

Moving?Moving?

Find A Find AToday Helping Helping Hand

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

16

FIND YOUR OUTLET. FIND YOUR OUTLET. RELAX, REPEAT UNWIND, RELAX, UNWIND, REPEAT CLASSIFIEDS CLASSIFIEDSHEALTH/MIND, HEALTH/ BODY & MIND, BODYhttp://www.washingtonci&SPIRIT SPIRIT

60

61

67

Out with the old, In with the 1 Sail new Post your 2 Globe curse listing 3 Tease with playfully Washington 4 Publicity ___ 5 Comic who was City Paper in the fictional Classifieds

Down

band The Rutles http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ 6 What may lie

Miscellaneous Multi Positions (National Placement out of Fairfax County, VA). Able to travel/relocate to difFINDclient YOURsites OUTLET. ferent as needed. Any suitable of educ, training RELAX,combo UNWIND, REPEAT or exp acceptable. All positions CLASSIFIEDS HEALTH/ req at least MS Degree & although noMIND, exps req’d candidate must have BODY & SPIRIT specifi c degree & coursework ashttp://www.washingtonlisted below. Foreign degree citypaper.com/ equiv acceptable.

MANAGEMENT ANALYST (Healthcare): Degree in either, Healthcare, Medicine, Biotechnology Pharmacology or Public Health. Must have coursework in Medicine & either Public Health or Community Medicine. As position req’s functional medical knowledge, coursework in physiology, microbiology & pharmacology are req’d. Candidate will conduct strategic & functional analysis to design sys’s & procedures to assist management to improve their healthcare statistical data systems. Salary $102,149Yr. Ref# MGTH–0815 SC

Moving?

Find A Helping Hand Today

MANAGEMENT ANALYST Out with the old, (Business): Degree in either, In with the new Business, Management, Finance, PostHealth your listing Public or IT related fi eld. with Must haveWashington coursework or internship in ERP as well as Strategic City Paper Management or Supply Chain Classifieds Management & In addition, http://www.washingtcoursework or internships must oncitypaper.com/ also include Business Analysis; & Business Intelligence. Candidate will conduct strategic or operational analysis to design sys’s & procedures to assist management to operate more effi ciently & effectively in business environment. Salary $102,149Yr. Ref# MGTB–0815 SC REGULATORY AFFAIRS SPECIALIST (Validation): Degree in Regulatory Affairs. Must have coursework in drug & device regulation as well as new drug development regulation. Also must have food & drug law coursework as well as regulatory compliance This position req’s candidate to coordinate & document internal regulatory processes, such as internal audits, inspections.

Candidate will compile & prep materials necessary for regulatory review. Salary $83,637Yr. Ref# REGV–0815 SC

Out with the FIND YOUR old, In with MOVING? OUTLET. OUTLET. RELAX, the new RELAX, FIND YOUR UNWIND, UNWIND, PostREPEAT your CLASSIFIEDS REPEAT HEALTH/MIND, listing withBODY & SPIRIT CLASSIFIEDS http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ Washington HEALTH/ MIND, BODY City Paper LAST WEEK: SNOW DRIFTS Classifieds & SPIRIT 7 8

ahead, in a cliché Diving gear Two-time Emmy winner for Veep Ishmael’s boss Start from the beginning NFL commentator Aikman

VALIDATION ENGINEER: Degree in either, Eng’g or Management Technology. Must have coursework in Sys’s Management Technology. As the position req’s functional eng’g knowledge coursework in Industrial Operations as well as QC is req’d.

Candidate will conduct strategic eng’g analysis to design sys’s & procedures to assist management to improve their quality systems operations. Salary $99,819Yr. Ref# VENG–0815 SC

FIND A HELPING HAND TODAY MOVING? FIND A

9 10 11

V I R G I L

I N C O D E

M B E I R Z E D O M I Z L

A D U A F C M O A D O N L I D S O G A D S P I E A L S I R U T R E G S S E P A T E S W O L S A P O T Y S

A R T Y

O R O A T T N

L G A B L E S O http://www E N RwashingtO O T O W N S O U N D oncitypaper.com/ K N O W S B A E P A M T A R L E S S O S K I R U N N W H E E L S A H O Y S L O E L P G A H A O L E S O N O S W A L T D E R S C A R E R N E E T A D O S T S O Y

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

VALIDATION ENGINEER (Pharma): Degree in either, Pharmacology, Biotechnology, Medicine or Chemistry. Must have coursework in Biotechnology as well as Pharmaceuticals. As position req’s functional knowledge or coursework in either Healthcare or Medicine. Any suitable combo of educ, training or exp accepted.

Candidate will conduct strategic analysis to design sys’s & procedures to assist management to improve their pharma lab sys’s & ops. Salary $99,819Yr. Ref# VENP–0815 SC

HELPING HAND TODAY

All positions FT/Perm 9-5, 40 hrs/wk. Use Ref# when applying.

Resumes to Software Catalysts, LLC 131 Elden Street, Suite 302, Herndon, VA 20170. Software Catalysts is EOE M/F/V/D.

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City Paper Classifieds

Counseling GEORGETOWN PSYCHOTHERAPY. individual, couples, group. Experienced,caring PH.D. therapist. drwendellcox.com, (202) 333-6606.

FIND YOUR OUTLET. Antiques & Collectibles RELAX, UNWIND, REPEAT CLASSIFIEDS HEALTH/ MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

Comic Book & Sports Card Show Sunday January 31 10am-3pm Tysons Corner Va. Crowne Plaza 1960 Chain Bridge Rd 22102 dealers selling Gold, Silver, Bronze & Modern Age Comic Books, Nonsports cards of all types including Pokemon & Magic PLUS vintage to the present Baseball, Football, Basketball & Hockey cards and sports memorabilia,Plus some vintage LP records and collectibles & Hobby supplies Info: shoffpromotions.com

Counseling Pregnant? Thinking of Adoption? Talk with a caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. Living Expenses Paid. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-413-6293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/Indiana.

F R C M

h

Health & Beauty Products ELIMINATE CELLULITE and Inches in weeks! All natural. Odor free. Works for men or women.

Free month supply on select packages. Order now! 844-2447149 (M-F 9am-8pm central)

Licensed Massage & Spas

M Hel

http://www.washingtFree Stuff oncitypaper.com/ Moving out of condo. Have the following free USED outdated items available for pick-up immediately. 1)Large microwave 2) Heavy bag for big kids (stable) 3) 2-green cloth chairs on wheels 4) exercise bike 5)gut cruncher bar (floor model) and various drinking glasses

Miscellaneous Viagra!! 52 Pills for Only $99.00. Your #1 trusted provider for 10 years. Insured and Guaranteed Delivery. Call today 1-888403-9028

RELAXING SOOTHING MASSAGE 240-463-7754 Valerie@ yourclassicmassage. com People come to me for my gentleness and knowledge of the body.

I listen to your needs and present the massage appropriate for them. Reduce your stress, relax your mind, energize your body and restore your balance. Private offi ce in the Palisades. MacArthur Blvd., NW, DC. Outcalls welcome.

Appointment only.

Cars/Trucks/SUVs

Moving?

Find A Helping Hand Today

NE ED A C NEED CAR, A R, TTRUCK RUCK ooff SUV? SU V ?

Over O v e r 11,000 ,0 0 0 vehicles v e hicle s iinn stock s to c k from f rom 22011-2015!

011-2 015!

FFinancing in a n cing ffor or ““ALL” A L L” credit cr e dit situsi t u aations! tions!

Call C all JJason a son @ 202.704.8213 2 0 2.7 0 4.8 2 13 MD --Laurel L a ur el M D Cash For Cars We Buy Any Condition Vehicle, 2002 and Newer.

Nationwide Free Pick Up! Call Now: 1-888-420-3808 www. cash4car.com.

Bands/DJs for Hire

DJ DC SOUL man. Hiphop, reggae, go-go, oldies, etc. Clubs, caberets, weddings, etc. Contact the DC Soul Hot Line at 202/2861773 or email me at dc1soulman@live.com.

Events Comic Book & Sports Card Show Sunday January 31 10am-3pm Tysons Corner Va. Crowne Plaza 1960 Chain Bridge Rd 22102 Dealers selling Gold, Silver, Bronze & Modern Age Comic Books, Nonsports cards of all types including Pokemon & Magic PLUS vintage to the present Baseball, Football, Basketball & Hockey cards and sports memorabilia,Plus some vintage LP records and collectibles & Hobby supplies TOO. Info: shoffpromotions.com

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Volunteer Services Washington Defend rights. WashCityabortion Paper ington Area Clinic Defense Task Force (WACDTF) needs volunteer Classifieds clinic escorts Saturday morn-

MOVING?

FIND A HELPING HAND TODAY

ings, weekdays. Trainings, other http://www.washingtoninfo:202-681-6577, http://www. citypaper.com/ wacdtf.org, info@wacdtf.org.

Twitter: @wacdtf

http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

washingtoncitypaper.com january 29, 2016 43

FIN OU RE UN RE CL HE MI &

http onci