Washington City Paper (December 25, 2015)

2015

CITYPAPER Washington

Free Volume 35, no. 52 WashingtonCityPaPer.Com DeCember 25–31, 2015

in…

Politics 7 Food 13

Music 17 Film 20

Images 22

housing: why is that flip gray? what does it mean? 5

parties: here’s what to do new year’s eve 25

2 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

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THE HUNGRIES

4 Chatter

City List

5 Concrete Details: That house is gray. But what does it mean?

7 Loose Lips: The Loosies 6 Unobstructed View 10 Gear Prudence 10 Savage Love 11 Buy D.C.

25 City Lights: Celebrate Christmas at the movies with the new Quentin Tarantino film.

25 New Year’s Eve 25 Music 28 Galleries 30 Dance 30 Theater 33 Film

d.C. feed

34 CLassifieds

distriCt Line

13 Young & Hungry: The Hungries 15 Grazer: Sauce-O-Meter 15 Brew In Town: Lost Rhino Cherry Bourbon BarrelAged RhiNoel Dubbel 15 Are You Gonna Drink That? Ten01’s Deliverance

arts

17 Music: The best music of 2015 20 Film: Olszewski and Gittell’s top films of the year 22 Galleries: Jacobson’s favorite images shown in D.C. this year

diversions 35 Crossword

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CHATTER A Fig Leaf

In which the Fig & Olive saga continues

DArrow MontgoMery

RaRely does Washington City Paper highlight the

work of another news outlet here in Chatter, but this week is an exception. Jessica Sidman’s investigation into Fig & Olive’s D.C. outpost, the apparent source of several salmonella infections and subject of an October cover story, continued last week as she revealed that the restaurant served food pre-prepared at a Long Island City, N.Y., commissary and raised its prices following the bacteria outbreak. (Another revelation: Fig & Olive uses Hellmann’s mayo as its aioli base: “‘Ha. So I guess even fancy restaurants use name brand mayo for their aioli,’ the CDC epidemiologist wrote in an email. ‘It was a bit of a surprise!’ her DOH counterpart remarked.”) Sidman gave Fig & Olive representatives several days to respond to the pieces, built on the results of a Freedom of Information Act request to the D.C. Department of Health, but they declined to comment.

The revelations in Sidman’s pieces went national, and Fig & Olive eventually put out a statement that didn’t directly answer many of the allegations. Its president, Greg Galy, then decided to give his first post-scandal interview to the Washington Post’s Tim Carman, a City Paper alum. When Carman asked Galy why he didn’t speak to Sidman, Galy replied, “I don’t think they are a preferable source of information. We definitely prefer talking to you directly as we feel there is a lot more objectivity.” It got better: Galy: I apologize to our guests for being subjected to any misrepresentation by the media.

Carman: You apologize for what?

Galy: To our guests for being subjected to any misrepresentation by the media. [...]

Carman: Do you apologize to the people who got sick?

Galy: I apologize to our guests for being subjected to any misrepresentation by the media.

“How not to do PR, restaurant edition,” Ben Pershing, managing editor of National Journal, tweeted of the interview. City Paper still welcomes the opportunity to speak to —Sarah Anne Hughes Galy about Sidman’s pieces.

Want to see your name in bold on this page? Send letters, gripes, clarifications, or praise to editor@washingtoncitypaper.com.

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4 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

DISTRICTLINE

Mayor Bowser’s chief of staff helped FreshPAC organizers on a development project. washingtoncitypaper.com/go/fresh

ConCrete details

Grayed Expectations

The color on that rowhouse says something. Is it gentrification or sprucing up?

If you live in a part of D.C. where houses are bought and sold like daytrader shares—or if you just have a bad habit of surfing Zillow at work—there’s one aesthetic question that’s probably crossed your mind in recent months.

What’s with all the gray houses?

From Petworth to Anacostia, Riggs Park to Bloomingdale, developers are applying fresh paint in tones of Raincloud or Flagstone to the fronts of newly renovated rowhouses, as subtle as a 25-foot “For Sale” sign. The gray rowhouse shines out to homebuyers not so much as a beacon in the fog but a foggy beacon, its message contradictory: Here is a chance to buy property in D.C., but hurry, it’s fleeting; this neighborhood is desirable but in transition; the house is seemingly pristine, and most likely a flip.

Although the exact origins of “flip-house gray” are unclear, the trend goes back a few years. In a 2013 article about the resurgence of house flipping, the Wall Street Journal mentions a house in Columbia Heights that was very quickly and profitably flipped; the accompanying photo shows a gray-brown front with a red door.

Since then, D.C. house prices have continued their steep ascent, and some developers have renovated dozens of properties around the city, making gray part of their tried-andtrue formula. A scroll through the portfolio of ERB Properties, for example, turns up mostly gray rowhouses, several of them converted to condos. Just a few minutes browsing real estate sites like Redfin or Trulia will yield scores of gray rowhouses listed for sale around the city.

District residents are noticing brick streetscapes cloud over, and not everyone is happy about it. This past summer, the local blog Next Stop… Riggs Park reported “what seems to be a (disturbing to some) trend— painting the houses gray.” One commenter on the site expressed concern that “we will be a

neighborhood of houses with peeling paint instead [of] the lovely natural brick,” while another endorsed the change: “I’ve always loved the colors and individuality of houses in Shaw, LeDroit Park, and Capitol Hill.”

Why paint a brick rowhouse at all?

Mainly, it’s a cheap, easy way to refresh a brick facade. Many rowhouses in the city are a century old, or close to it, and “you probably don’t want to risk [damaging] hundredyear-old mortar by power-washing,” notes Kevin Wood, a realtor with Slate Properties. Left as is, old brick may appear dingy—especially if the house dates to the era when coal was burned in D.C.—or it will have gaps between courses where the mortar needs repointing, a painstaking repair job. New paint can hide a multitude of small flaws.

On a row of near-identical brick houses, there’s no better way to make yours stand out than with a coat of contrasting paint. A prospective buyer cruising the neighborhood won’t wonder which one is the house for sale—it’s the gray one, obviously.

Gray is neutral, “a safe, boring color,” says Wood, that’s “inoffensive to the largest number of people.” He’s showed gray houses and never heard a peep about the color, as opposed to a neon-green house he sold. (“That got comments.”)

But gray isn’t the only neutral. Why not beige, tan, or cream?

I posed the question to Annie Elliott, an interior designer in D.C. who runs a business called Bossy Color. About two years ago, Elliott says, gray replaced beige as the most popular neutral in home interiors, so she’s not surprised that it’s moved outside. It’s a safe color, she agrees, but one she has a lot of respect for.

“Gray really does walk this line between tra-

Gray manages to blur a few of D.C.’s barriers.

Photographs by Darrow Montgomery/File

By Amanda Kolson Hurley

ditional and classic,” Elliot says. “It’s easy to imagine you putting your own stamp on a gray house, in a small way that will have a big impact.” For instance, an owner who likes contemporary design might paint the door kelly green (“Gray looks sharp with more poppy colors,” unlike beige, she notes), while someone with traditional taste would opt for a red or black door.

This flexibility is a big advantage for developers marketing their homes to a wide range

of customers. Another advantage, Elliott says, is that gray makes a good backdrop for plants, maximizing the appeal of what’s often a tiny front yard.

A timid, wishy-washy, bipartisan color: Gray seems like it was destined for D.C., at least for the D.C. that exists in the minds of New York Times writers. But as Elliott points out, the city no longer deserves its reputation for lacking style. (Anyway, who are Brooklynites to judge us from their brownstones?)

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 5

DISTRICTLINE The city is sharply divided along lines of class and race, though, which brings me to the most interesting thing about the gray phenomenon: It manages to blur a few of those barriers. Gray is fashionable in Riggs Park and Brightwood, and also in Columbia Heights, where property values are higher. Higher still are the house prices in Dupont and Capitol Hill, and gray is a popular choice there for nonflipped houses, too.

The city’s most desirable rowhouse neighborhoods got that way, in part, thanks to their superior housing stock. In the late 19th century, developers such as Charles Gessford used an array of decorative features to woo the professional class that had emerged in Washington after the Civil War: terra cotta and stained glass, intricate cornices, pediments, deep bay windows, and even conical roofs, which sit on top of houses in Bloomingdale and Capitol Hill like party hats.

Later on, owners painted their houses different colors. Now those blocks strike a happy balance between individuality and conformity, an effect that the commenter on the Riggs Park blog, and many other Washingtonians, love.

By the early 1900s, highly ornamented facades had gone out of style. Harry Wardman, the British-born mogul who built thousands of houses around the District, usually had his architects design plainer fronts. So paint does more to spruce up one of Wardman’s “day lighter” houses in Petworth or Kingman Park than it does for an ornate Gessford rowhouse. A lick of gray paint goes even further in places like Riggs Park, where the houses were built later still and with less architectural detailing.

All down the chain of D.C. real estate, gray is how flippers “sell up” by evoking the cachet of a more expensive zip code. Columbia Heights plus gray is Adams Morgan; Manor Park plus gray is Petworth, or close enough.

On one level, gray really means white—it’s a visual code for gentrification.

But who’d begrudge a homeowner wanting her house to look different from the neighbor’s, or preferring crisp gray to the orangey red of modern brick? For those of us who can’t afford a house with patina, fresh paint is a shortcut to architectural style and to the parts of Boomtown that elude our grasp. Maybe I

6 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

can’t live on 14th Street, but I can eat oysters and paint my house Oyster.

Flip-house gray doesn’t try to look like stone, the way Baltimore formstone does; it doesn’t pretend to be anything other than what it is: paint on brick. It’s aspirational, but at $40 a gallon, not an actual driver of gentrification.

Of course, the more popular it gets, the less of an impression it will make, and developers will surely abandon it—if they haven’t moved on to another color first. Elliott says ivories and

whites are gaining on gray inside D.C. homes, and so are navy blue and even black. Elsewhere, black houses are already a thing among architects and their high-end clients, so it’s conceivable we’ll start seeing them in D.C. soon.

Whether or not that happens, one thing is clear: Red brick, so characteristic of D.C., is on the wane. Once a house is painted, there’s usually no going back; repainting is easier than stripping it off. Locals attached to the warmth of raw brick will be disappointed.

I like the look of brick, too, and its connection to the red-clay soil beneath our feet.

But I don’t see reason to worry. Brick exteriors are hardly endangered in the District. And no one should fear an engulfing “grayscape”— many of the people buying gray houses today will choose a different shade when it’s time to repaint in seven or ten years.

A couple of decades from now, D.C. will be a brighter city, the current fad for gray barely discernible on its multicolored blocks. Power CP to the paint brush, I say.

DISTRICTLINE

Tomorrow’s history today: This was the week we learned that D.C.’s population is growing faster than 48 states.

Loose Lips

The Loosies

New mayor, new government, same antics: Here are the recipients of 2015’s awards.

The Worst Good Idea Award: FreshPAC

Muriel Bowser mostly avoided the kind of shenanigans that hamstrung predecessor Vince Gray’s first year in office. Thanks to her short time in office, Bowser could (rightly) put most of the blame for bad news on the people who went before her in the mayoral suite, whether the problem was with school renovation cost overruns or crummy ambulance service.

And then there was FreshPAC. Using a loophole, two Bowser devotees organized a political action committee that could take unlimited contributions in off-year elections. That meant mammoth amounts.

As realpolitik, FreshPAC was a great idea. Mayors can already use their influence to raise huge amounts for their favored candidates; why should that power be limited to contributions to actual campaign committees? FreshPAC promised to give Bowser the power to pick and choose her coun-

The Upstanding Citizen Award: Muriel Bowser’s Standing Staffers

LL can’t blame District government workers for wanting to kiss up to the mayor. With no governor or state legislature to deal with, what Bowser says goes (pending congressional approval, of course).

Still, LL was surprised to find a February email from a Bowser administration official telling staffers that

they actually have to stand when Bowser enters their office.

Stranger still, LL’s story on the email only seems to have made people more likely to treat Bowser like a judge coming into court.

Since it ran, LL has noticed more staffers— and even a couple of reporters!—standing up for the mayor when she enters a room.

The C’mon, Man Award: Ron Machen

The flip side of Gray’s comeback is what it means for Ron Machen, the former U.S. attorney who hounded Gray and his associates. The investigation’s fizzling end doesn’t matter much personally for Machen, who can still collect hefty checks from his whiteshoe law firm. But it does mean a lot for the District, where prosecutors will likely be warier of launching drawn-out public corruption cases.

Photographs by Darrow Montgomery

2015 was the year the new mayor moved the city past the Vince Gray investigation and the rest of its issues, from an ailing fire department to an affordable housing crisis. Just kidding, all that old stuff is still knocking around, but now there’s a new person in charge of the mess. And what a mess it is!

cilmembers with what organizers hoped would be a whopping $1 million fund by the end of this year.

As mayoral policy, though, FreshPAC was a disaster. After helping the PAC raise funds, Bowser found herself answering questions about it on a near-daily basis. The fact that FreshPAC’s donors were tied to tens of millions of dollars in city contracts didn’t help. Neither did the news, broken after the PAC was shut down for being a “distraction,” that FreshPAC’s chairman had lobbied the mayor on the Exelon-Pepco merger. In the end, FreshPAC had to go because it made the usual sleazy (but legal) connections between business people and politicians too obvious to ignore.

Jandos Rothstein

By Will Sommer

The Call It a Comeback Award: Vince Gray

On Jan. 2, Gray handed the city over to Bowser and became an ex-mayor. But in practice, Gray’s mayoralty had been over for nearly a year after his 2014 primary loss to Bowser.

Gray’s administration had already been operating in a lame duck twilight; handing over the city seal just made it official.

Gray’s post-mayoral life was just as gloomy for most of 2015, as the federal investigation into his 2010 campaign kept him from any of the cushy jobs ex-mayors are usually handed on their way out of the mayoral suite.

But then, a new U.S. attorney shut down the investigation, meaning there wouldn’t be any charges against Gray (or his unnamed relative and friend, both of whom purportedly benefited illegally from businessman Jeff Thompson’s largesse). Within days, Gray was transformed from a former politician who haunts community meetings into a serious contender for 2016 D.C. Council races.

The Water Park Award for Achievements in Vincent Orange Thinking: Vincent Orange’s Tiny Houses

At-Large Councilmember Vincent Orange faces a tough re-election campaign in 2016, but this year proved why Orange is on the Council in the first place: to come up with totally crazy projects (and also help his buddies in the business community at the same time).

The foundational kooky Orange idea was his 2013 plan to replace the land around RFK Stadium with an elaborate water park entertainment and hotel complex that Orange had already specified down to its number of wine bars. That plan never came to fruition, and LL worried the councilmember was coming

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 7

DISTRICTLINE back to Earth.

Hardly! In November, Orange proposed building 1,000 “tiny houses” for low-income residents and millennials in a city-funded program that conveniently would benefit Orange’s business community backers.

That age restriction means it almost certainly violates fair housing laws, but who cares?

The point of Orange projects isn’t that they happen, it’s that someone thought of them at all.

The Winning by Losing Award: Mayoral, Council Race Losers

2015 was the year failed politicians still managed to get jobs in the District government—albeit not the way they were planning when they launched their campaigns. Bowser picked up former attorney general candidate Edward “Smitty” Smith and Ward 8 race loser Eugene Kinlow. Attorney General Karl Racine hired one of his former AG rivals, Lateefah Williams, along with ex-Council candidates Trayon White and Robert White.

Coincidentally or not, both Whites are well-positioned to run against candidates backed by Bowser, Racine’s frequent foe in tussles over his office’s power.

with Racine, the District’s first elected attorney general, who has launched his office’s PR operation into the stratosphere. Judging by his calendar, Racine has been everywhere this year, from community meetings to chatting with reporters before turning his own appearance for jury duty into a media event.

The Best Thorn in the Mayor’s Side Award: Kenyan McDuffie

Ward 5 Councilmember Kenyan McDuffie could afford to take it easy in 2015. He has years until he has to make a decision about running for mayor (or attorney general, or Council chairman). Instead of keeping things low-pro, though, McDuffie has used his position on the Council’s judiciary committee to needle the mayor on a series of wonky good-government issues, from police body camera transparency to the power of the attorney general’s office.

The Hands-Down Best Moment of the Year Award: Brandon Todd’s Debate Performance

With Bowser’s endorsement, Brandon Todd managed to whack the rest of the Ward 4 field looking to fill the mayor’s old Council spot. Despite beating his rivals by double digits, though, Todd struggled with claims that he was just a seat-filler for the mayor’s agenda. Todd’s lightweight image wasn’t helped when, asked in a debate who his favorite historical figure was, Todd googled “historical figure” and went with the first CP answer he found.

The Mr. Congeniality Award: Karl Racine

The District’s attorneys general have traditionally not been guys you’d want to have a beer with. And why should they be? They didn’t have to deal with elections or mayors eager to chop up their office. That’s changed

Brandon Todd

Got a tip for LL? Send suggestions to lips@washingtoncitypaper.com. Or call (202) 650-6925.

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UNOBSTRUCTEDVIEW Fandom Versus Self-Interest

By Matt Terl Last weekend, I found myself in a quandary that’s become familiar to more and more football fans over the last decade, one that pitted a lifetime of fandom against a pile of holiday cash.

The local NFL team is putting together what at this point can only be described as a [CLICHE ALERT] “playoff push.” They’re playing their best ball of the season, the other teams in the division appear to be falling apart, and they are [CLICHE ALERT] “in control of their own destiny.”

As someone who’s been rooting for this team for more than three decades, this is fun and it feels important to me in that way that only sports can. (Note to a certain subset of readers: Yes, I root for the team and want them to change their name. I can hold these non-mutually exclusive concepts in my head at once. You should try it sometime.)

On the other hand, my fantasy football team was… I know, I know. No one cares about anyone else’s fantasy football team. But bear with me.

My fantasy football team was in the first round of the playoffs, tops in the league in scoring and riding an 11-game win streak, but destroyed by late-season injuries and demotions.

This is a league that I’ve been in for about 15 years, mostly with friends from high school.

We’re competitive about it without being insane—that insanity has been tempered by kids, spouses, real jobs, and all the other things that stand between a person and unlimited hours of nerding out on something. In practice, this means there’s a significant, friendly wager riding on the outcome of these fantasy games.

This creates an interesting dichotomy: The outcome of the actual football game on TV has no real bearing on my life, whereas the imaginary game that takes place only in the algorithms of my league’s host site has the potential to provide me with a direct, tangible benefit.

And yet, whenever the two outcomes were in conflict, I found myself rooting for the real professional team even at the expense of my own finances. This seems irrational at best, and borderline insane at worst. So I decided to see if I was alone, in the least scientific way possible: via Twitter poll.

A few caveats: I specifically asked Pigskins fans to respond, and they were riding the high of their team’s win (and their rival’s loss), so the playoffs seemed particularly reachable.

The poll was retweeted by popular fan blog @BurgundyBlog, which means that the re-

spondents were disproportionately fanatical.

Perhaps most egregiously, I did not specify an approximate dollar amount won or lost in the fantasy league.

The gap between responses was wide enough to overcome even the poll’s enormous margin of error: Out of 374 respondents, 92 percent said that they’d prefer to have their team make the playoffs than “win [money] in fantasy.”

That means only 30 people chose the response that provides them with a tangible, financial benefit.

Eric Bateman summed up the general sentiment as to why: “Fantasy $ money gets spent but [Pigskins] glory... lasts forever!”

This a pretty straightforward facet of a Gladwellian pop-sociological concept known

The local NFL team is putting together what at this point can only be described as a [CLICHE ALERT] “playoff push.” as Basking in Reflected Glory (BIRGing)— that is, the idea that people like to associate themselves with success. The classic example is wearing team-branded apparel after a team’s win. It’s one of those nebulous concepts that seems obvious when you say it, and largely pointless when you hear it described.

The realization that I and 92 percent of respondents were choosing reflected glory over tall stacks of Yankee dollars seemed somehow significant.

It explains, to a certain extent, why defenders of the team’s name are so rabid. It explains why we keep coming back, year after depressing year, and still manage to take some joy when the team throws together a win streak that puts them on the precipice of the postseason. From a certain perspective, this simple, weird psychological quirk explains everything about being a sports fan.

It also all turned out to be totally moot, as my injury-ravaged fantasy squad totally choked in its playoff game, so there was no financial benefit to be had anyhow. And reflected glory is CP definitely better than no glory at all.

Follow Matt Terl on Twitter @matt_terl. washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 9

SAVAGELOVE After spending some years in the doldrums after having kids, my husband and I are now enjoying hot kinky sex and the occasional free pass to fuck other people. We couldn’t be happier. I have a friend who was extremely keen for me to cage his cock with the same kind of locking male chastity device I got for my husband—a fixed-ring stainless-steel type. I have two questions: (1) It took some maneuvering to get my husband’s balls through one by one, followed by his cock, but he managed. Is it okay for his balls to swell up tight, get cold, and go purple when he’s wearing the cock cage and he is aroused? He says it doesn’t hurt, and he is wearing it only while I peg him—a couple of hours tops. I worry that even though he can squeeze into the ring, he might be cutting off circulation and doing damage. (2) My friend couldn’t get his balls and cock into the cage. His balls never dropped as a child, so he had an operation that pulled them down but fixed them in place. Consequently they sit “high and tight” and can’t be pulled away from his body. Can you recommend a cage that might fit him? He is into total submission and orgasm denial, and he wants to experience long-term forced chastity and relinquish control of his dick to me. (Hot, right?!) If a cage can’t work for him, are there other toys/ methods I can use to give him that sense of surrendered cock and loss of control?

—Bitch Ably Locking Lucky Sluts Up Properly 1. “The first rule of thumb when it comes to male chastity is this: If the balls go blue or cold, take the fucking cock cage off!” said Christopher Miers, the founder and creative force behind Steelwerks (steelwerksextreme. com), purveyors of the world’s finest male chastity devices.

“I’m a firm believer in play safe, stay comfortable, and cause pain or discomfort only when it’s asked for and nobody is at risk of long-term damage,” said Miers. “So for the sake of their marriage and the longevity of their hot kinky sex life, BALLSUP needs to get her guy a cage that keeps him trapped but still in the realm of safe!”

A short primer for readers who aren’t familiar with male chastity devices: Most are anchored in place by a ring that goes around the shaft and behind the balls. The penis slides into a cylinder that attaches to the top of the ring, and the cylinder prevents erections and can even punish erections. (Some are lined with spikes.) Once the chastity device is locked—cheaper ones with a wee padlock, custom ones with something more artful—there’s no way to remove it (and free the cock) without tearing the balls off.

Back to you, BALLSUP: Miers has been creating custom-made, high-quality stainless-steel male chastity devices for 15 years— so he’s the recognized expert on male chastity devices here, not your husband. Listen to

Miers and toss the device you’re using now and get your husband a chastity cage that doesn’t turn his balls purple. You may have to experiment with some other designs and an assortment of cock rings before you find the one that locks his cock down without choking his balls off.

“I often hear from guys who wear cages made with a one-piece, slip-on-style cock ring that it allows them to slip in easily and comfortably—but a lot of guys can remove these chastity devices even when they’re locked,” said Miers. “But a cage with a smaller, more secure cock ring often results in a cock ring that is too tight, especially when the person is using cheaper, mass-produced cages. The best chastity devices are ones that come with a cock ring that can be opened via a hinge or taken apart—then you can get a ring that might be too small to push his balls through using the one-ball-after-the-other method, but because the ring comes apart, getting it on and off is much easier while providing the safety and inescapability both parties are looking for.”

Would you promote the new meme that Trump = dump?

As in “I have to take a trump” or “I just took a major trump.

2. “I encountered my first client with the ‘balls not dropping issue’ a few years back, and it is a challenge when it comes to chastity,” said Miers. “For most of these guys, I encourage a PA as a means of anchoring a lightweight chastity device.” (A PA, also known as a Prince Albert, involves poking a bonus hole in the urethra below the head of the cock and putting a ring through it.) “A PA combined with a chastity device is the most durable and secure way to lock a guy’s cock up for longterm orgasm denial and forced chastity play.”

10 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

But if your friend can handle some pressure on his balls, BALLSUP, a traditional style chastity device with a hinged or twopiece cock ring might work.

“Because his balls sit high and tight, it is important that the scrotal gap (the gap between the front of the cock ring and the tube opening) isn’t too tight, as this could possibly put more pressure on his balls,” said Miers. “The last option would be a full chastity belt. While some of the belts out there are incredibly sexy and completely secure, experience and client feedback tell me that in the long-term, these are not ideal for a guy who wants to be kept in chastity every day.” You can follow Christopher Miers on Twitter @steelwerks.

—Dan Savage I’m a 29-year-old bi female living on the East Coast, and I’ve been in a relationship for three months. It’s been a few years since I’ve dated anyone seriously, and I’m really enjoying it. We have a good relationship so far, and he’s great in a lot of ways, but that’s part of the problem. Next summer, he will be moving back to his hometown in the Midwest. I just started my dream job, so there’s no way I would follow him. I’m uncertain about doing the long-distance thing. Since we’re only three months into this, should I cut my losses and call it quits and move on? Or should I enjoy these next six months and let the chips fall where they may, whether it’s the end of the relationship or the transition to long-distance?

—Impending Expiration Date Anything could happen in the next six months. You could lose your dream job, this guy could decide not to return to his Midwestern hometown after all, or you could turn on the news and learn a mega-tsunami 300 feet high is racing toward the East Coast and you have eight hours to get the fuck out before your city is washed off the map—and at that point, your boyfriend’s hometown in the Midwest might not look so bad. (Really! It could happen: youtu.be/Fzm49fUSCPk.) So keep dating this guy because, hey, you never know. What you want and where you want to be can change radically in six months’ time.

—Dan Since you had the ability to make Santorum what he is today (a substance, not a senator), would you promote the new meme that Trump = dump?

As in “I have to take a trump” or “I just took a major trump—like a transatlantic-cable trump.”

—Gross Old Politicians I’m Dan Savage and I approve this meme.

—Dan Send your Savage Love questions to mail@savagelove.net.

Gear Prudence: It’s the holiday season, and everyone in my family knows that I’m a pretty serious cyclist. That means that every year I get a bunch of bike-themed gifts, which, if I’m being quite honest, aren’t exactly that great. Over the years, I’ve determined exactly what kinds of products and brands I like and these gifts are never those. It’s not that I’m ungrateful—I’m just very particular, and I’m worried that I don’t have a good enough poker face to hide my disappointment.

Do you have any tips on how to deal with this?

—Secretly Cringing, Relatives Obviously Oblivious, Gifting Errantly Dear SCROOGE: Listen, sometimes Santa blows it. Hopefully when he blows it, he includes a gift receipt. Faking gratitude for a present you don’t want is hard, so don’t. Instead, actually be grateful for the opportunity to pass along this gift to a cyclist (or bike nonprofit that accepts donations) that could use it. Sure, the whole “being generous to those less fortunate” thing isn’t as fun as scoring an awesome present, but since that’s not happening (due, in part, to your very particular tastes) take pride in your new role as bike gift conduit. Yes, this is technically “re-gifting,” but it’s better to find a bike gift a new home than to toss it on the pile of other bike stuff —GP you’ll never use.

Gear Prudence: What’s up with leather bike saddles? They look uncomfortable, and also, I checked the price, and they’re so expensive! Why do so —Cool Or Wack? many people have them?

Dear COW: Leather is a lifestyle. There was a time when almost all bike seats were made of leather, but the advent of fancy space-age non-bovine materials have since made the leather saddle more of an anomaly than the standard option. That said, leather seats are an increasingly popular option for reasons related to comfort and looks. Like a baseball glove, a leather saddle will, over time, “break in” based on your weight and bum shape. Unlike a baseball glove, leather saddles are not signed by famous players, though I suppose you could bring one to the ballpark and rectify that. Might be weird though.

The other big draw of the leather saddle is aesthetic. They just look classier than synthetic saddles, and if you’re the kind of person who wants to exude an air of taste and refinement, leather is the only way to go. Be mindful, however, that leather saddles aren’t waterproof (invest in a leather conditioner).

They’ll also eventually stretch their way into obsolescence, but only after a billion miles (or —GP slightly sooner).

Gear Prudence is Brian McEntee, who tweets @sharrowsDC. Got a question about bicycling?

Email gearprudence@washcp.com.

BUYD.C.

Hangover Helper

By Kaarin Vembar

2015

Fresh Food Market-Tu-Su Arts & Crafts - Weekends easternmarket-dc.org Tu-Fr 7-7 | Sa 7-6 | Su 9-5

Yeah, I’m Into Fitness. Fit’ness Whole Burger In My Mouth Sometimes the only answer is a big, juicy hamburger.

The Burger, $6.99. BGR The Burger Joint.

1514 Connecticut Ave. NW. (202) 299-1071.

You Don’t Know Jack Some people swear that hair of the dog is the cure. This 100-milliliter serving will give you more than an airplane bottle, but will ensure you don’t go overboard (again).

Jack Daniels, $4.95/100mL bottle. AB Liquor Co. 1803 Columbia Road NW. (202) 234-5500.

Mean Muggin’ Fill this mug with coffee and let the caffeine dull the thumping pain in your skull.

Cuppa color mug, $13. Proper Topper. 1350 Connecticut Ave. NW. (202) 842-3055.

Jagged Little Pill Drop by your local corner stores and pick up an individual packet of Tylenol prior to your night out.

Tylenol single pack, $1. Metro Market. 2130 P St. NW. (202) 833-3720.

I’ll Jrink To That Fuel Me Up by Jrink contains five pounds of hydrating fruits and veggies per bottle.

Fuel Me Up, $9.25. Jrink. 1323 Connecticut Ave. NW. (202) 280-0302. washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 11

MIDDLE EASTERN CUISINE

Olive Lounge Middle Eastern Cuisine for the

Holidays Be sure to include Middle Eastern Cuisine as part of your holiday festivities this year.

We offer catering services for any size or type of occasion.

HOME PARTY BUSINESS FUNCTIONS CARRY OUT PLATTERS AND MORE Delivery and full service staff options available. Do take it easy for the holidays…we are at your service.

RESTAURANT AND CATERING MENU AVAILABLE AT: WWW.MIDEASTCUISINE.NET MIDEASTCUISINE@HOTMAIL.COM

7006 Carroll Ave. Takoma Park, MD

301-270-5154

Follow Us on FB and Check Us Out On Yelp 12 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

DCFEED

Chef R.J. Cooper is leaving Rogue 24 following a legal conflict with his business partner.

Read more at washingtoncitypaper.com/go/rogue.

YOUNG & HUNGRY

new spin-off cocktail bar in Shaw called Morris. They claim they want to avoid gimmicks this time—and yet their crowdfunding campaign still calls the place a “speakeasy.”

The Hungries The best and worst of D.C. restaurants in 2015

2015 was a year of lines. Lines for kolaches.

Lines for Filipino food. Lines for crack pie. And lines, still, for Rose’s Luxury. Make all the lemming wisecracks you want, but the willingness to wait just demonstrates D.C.’s growing obsession with food.

Fortunately, there were plenty of new restaurants worth obsessing over this year. Longdelayed Maketto finally opened its doors on H Street NE with some of the best fried chicken in the city, while Shaw’s Convivial proved “medium plates” could be a thing. The beer and booze scenes continued to grow, and D.C. got two bean-to-bar chocolate producers, plus a cheesemaking operation. Even vending machines have gone gourmet, thanks to Guerilla Vending.

Unfortunately, not every dining experience has lived up to expectations. Momofuku Milk Bar fell short of the hype, while Fig & Olive sickened diners with salmonella. And for some reason, people are still opening “speakeasies” and steakhouses. To rehash the best and worst of it all, Young & Hungry brings you The Hungries, this column’s year-end awards.

Jessica Sidman

By Jessica Sidman

Trend That D.C. Needs: Poke

THE HUNGRIES

Most Overhyped Restaurant: Momofuku Milk Bar

The New York sweets shop opened in CityCenterDC to breathless enthusiasm. But the truth is, it’s just not that great. The treats are more sugary than an overstuffed Halloween bag. There’s no complexity or balance. Rather, Milk Bar banks on the flavors of nostalgia with cereal-milk soft serve and birthday cake. You have to regress to being a sugar-crazed ten-year-old to truly enjoy it.

Deserves More Hype: Baan Thai

Southeast Asian food is definitely an “it” cuisine at the moment, with most of the attention going to Little Serow, Doi Moi, Maketto, and Thip Khao. But Baan Thai is just as good as—if not often better than—these buzzier restaurants. Despite raves from a couple of food writers and a prime location on 14th Street NW, the masses haven’t quite caught on yet.

Skip the sushi, a remnant from the restaurant’s days as Tsunami Sushi, and go straight for the funky, spicy, and sour Thai dishes. A personal favorite is the Thai vermicelli in a chili peanut sauce made of ground pork and shrimp. And best of all, there’s never a wait for a table.

an ord ey J Car

Trend That Won’t Die But Should: Speakeasies

Aren’t we all a little tired of dark rooms with overpriced cocktails and “hidden” entrances? Never mind that most actual Prohibition-era speakeasies were unglamorous watering holes serving renatured industrial alcohol—bar owners refuse to give up their faux-nostalgia. The most recent example is Cloak & Dagger, a “speakeasy-themed” nightclub and lounge on U Street NW where female bartenders wear little more than bras and tight skirts. And then there was The Speak, a subterranean “speakeasy” that operated behind a mirror door on K Street until the liquor board shut it down for not having a valid liquor license. Turns out it was a real speakeasy! Meanwhile, The Sheppard, the Dupont spot with a no-photo policy and Playboys in the bathroom, closed this summer. Owners Spike Mendelsohn and Vinoda Basnayake are now planning a

During a trip to Hawaii this year, I became kind of obsessed with poke. The raw, marinated fish dish, often served over rice, is so ubiquitous there that entire grocery store and deli counters are devoted to the stuff. Poke has taken off in other cities, too—namely Los Angeles. “There is no denying that a poke craze is sweeping through L.A. right now, the likes of which hasn’t been seen since food trucks were a thing,” Eater LA wrote in May. In D.C., however, there are zero poke shops. Recently opened Hula Girl in Shirlington serves it, but it’s not the Hawaiian restaurant’s main focus. So here’s my plea to any restaurateurs looking for a cool new concept: Poke please?

Scam of the Year: Dîner en Blanc

The masterminds behind Dîner en Blanc deserve some credit. After all, it’s quite a feat to convince thousands of people to pay for a dinner that doesn’t include dinner (or even a chair to sit in). The French-inspired flash mob phenomenon requires attendees to don all white and haul their own picnic—including their own tables, white tablecloths, fine china, and other whiteonly accoutrement—to a secret location. A ticket and “membership fee” cost a total of $45, for which revelers get nothing more than a bunch of rules and directions. (“Originality is encouraged as long as it stays stylish and denotes taste.”) A publicist for the event claimed the waitlist for this year’s D.C. Dîner en Blanc was 13,000 people long. I wish that were a typo.

Biggest Disaster: Fig & Olive

Sending diners to the hospital with fevers, vomiting, and diarrhea is bad enough. But between the non-apologies and inwashingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 13

creased prices, Fig & Olive’s response to its salmonella outbreak hasn’t been much better.

Perhaps more surprising still is how Fig & Olive prepared food in the first place. While the upscale restaurant chain touts local farms and “genuine taste and seasonality” at the top of its menu, a lot of its food—from ratatouille to risotto—was pre-prepared at a central commissary in Long Island City, N.Y. Even epidemiologists investigating the salmonella outbreak expressed surprise that Fig & Olive used Hellmann’s mayo in its truffle olive oil aioli.

The commissary suspended production in the wake of the salmonella outbreak—before U.S. Food & Drug Administration investigators could collect food samples—and Fig & Olive now claims “all of our dishes are prepared in house at each location.” Still, representatives from the restaurant continue to decline my interview requests about its operations.

Instead, Fig & Olive president Greg Galy gave an interview to the Washington Post in which he wouldn’t apologize to diners sickened at his restaurants, and instead apologized for “misrepresentation by the media.” OK then.

Darrow Montgomery

DCFEED(cont.) biggest milestones yet, hasn’t gotten the attention it deserves. After its creamery sat unused for a year and a half, Sona near Eastern Market finally overcame buildout and regulatory hurdles to begin making curds in September. As far as owners Genevieve and Conan O’Sullivan are aware, Sona is the first commercial operation to age and cure cheese in D.C. Local regulators are even exploring a commercial cheesemaking license now. Bring on the gouda.

Jessica Sidman

Best Dishes I Ate This Year

Pop-Up of the Year: Republic Kolache

Republic Kolache’s “residency” at American Ice Company drew Rose’s Luxury-like lines during its first couple weekends. But you can now easily grab a picnic table on a Saturday morning and enjoy your kolache and a bottle of Topo Chico in peace. In case you haven’t discovered kolaches yet, these beloved Texas pastries of Czech origin consist of pillowy dough with sweet and savory fillings.

Until Texas natives Chris Svetlik and Brian Stanford launched Republic Kolache, you’d be hard pressed to find them in D.C. The kolache maker serves flavors like half-smoke, jalapeño, and cheddar as well as cream cheese with toasted pecan. But the must-try is a collaboration with DCity Smokehouse stuffed with brisket, pickled jalapenos, and cheese.

You don’t need to be a Texan to approve.

Biggest D.C. Food Milestone: Sona Creamery Makes Cheese

From gin to chocolate, many D.C.-made food products have become available in the past five years. But cheesemaking, one of the city’s 14 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

Taiwanese fried chicken at Maketto; Philly waffle at Barmini; egg-topped pork and shrimp Dorado dumplings at China Chilcano; Smokehouse Bomb at Wicked Bloom; hot and sour noodles at A&J Restaurant; romano beans at Nido; poppyseed gougères at Garrison; duck à l’orange at Chez Billy Sud; zucca pasta with butternut squash at The Red Hen; ikura nigiri at Sushi Taro; wonton soup at The Source; vadouvan curry with caramelized banana at Rose’s Luxury; Beatrix at Buredo; ukoy shrimp fritters at Bad Saint; arborio rice-stuffed squash blossoms at Etto; taco trio at Chaia.

Worst Dish I Ate This Year

Local airports deserve a lot of credit for recently bringing in better food options from local chefs. Flying out of Terminal A at Reagan National Airport this summer, I was pretty thrilled to grab one of the coveted spots at Page from chef Carla Hall. Each seat has its own tablet from which you can order food and check your email. The new setup seemed like such a fancy upgrade that I decided to treat myself to a glass of wine and some oysters. To my dismay, those oysters were warm, and after eating a couple, I had to send the rest back. I immediately knew I was going to be sick, and sure enough, the next day I was.

Lesson learned: I won’t eat oysters at an airCP port again.

Eatery tips? Food pursuits? Send suggestions to jsidman@washingtoncitypaper.com.

DCFEED

what we ate last week:

Mom’s mac and cheese, $9, Crisp Kitchen + Bar. Satisfaction level: 4 out of 5 what we’ll eat next week:

Pupusas, $12 on Mondays, Momofuku CCDC. Excitement level: 4 out of 5

Are you gonnA eAt that?

Grazer

Drink

SAUCE-O-METER

LAME SAUCE

How the week’s food happenings measure up

MUMBO SAUCE

The Drink: Deliverance Fig & Olive president refuses to apologize to salmonella victims in Washington Post interview.

Plan B Burger changes its name to b.

Hour-plus waits for Miracle on Seventh Street pop-up at Mockingbird Hill

17-year-old DC Coast will close at the end of the year.

Right Proper’s bathroom piano

True Food Kitchen parent company sues Founding Farmers over “true food & drink” motto.

brew in town Lost Rhino Cherry Bourbon Barrel-Aged RhiNoel Dubbel Where in Town: Lost Rhino Retreat, 22885 Brambleton Plaza, Ashburn, Va. Price: $12 for 22 oz.

Winterfail Traditional holiday beers like big barleywines, heavy winter warmers, and Belgian ales simply aren’t as appealing when it’s in the upper 60s and seeing a snowflake

Where to Get It: Ten 01, 1001 H St. NE; (202) 733-2405; ten01.com

CakeLove will close shop, refocus on cake in a jar

is as likely as seeing the Abominable Snowman. But for those of you determined to ring in the season with a festive brew, allow me to recommend a less hefty option: Lost Rhino Brewing Company’s RhiNoel. Medium-bodied and 7.5 percent alcohol, this Christmas beer is full of flavor without being overwhelming. A traditional Belgian dubbel, the beer is made with Abbey and crystal malts, Belgian “candi” sugar crystals, and yeast from Brasserie de Rochefort, one of Belgium’s legendary Trappist breweries.

Ch-ch-cherry Bomb!

This year’s version, Cherry Bourbon Barrel-aged RhiNoel, was released on Thanks-

A third Beefsteak is opening in D.C., this time in Tenleytown.

D.C. now has a chocolate factory offering tours and tastings.

Chef Jonah Kim’s uni waffle at Yona

giving after it spent six months in bourbon barrels with loads of tart cherries from Great Country Farms in Bluemont, Va. Before bottling and kegging, the brewery adds more tart cherries from Oregon. The resulting brew features rich, dark cherry flavors (as opposed to the cough syrup kind), joined by notes of vanilla and caramel. Cherry is prominent on the nose as well, amid date and white bread aromas. The beer carries a surprisingly prickly mouthfeel and finishes dry thanks to additional fermentation while in the barrels. Sound tasty? Kegs have been popping up around town, but RhiNoel is most easily found at Lost Rhino’s brewery or new restaurant, both in Ashburn. If you miss it, look for a sour version coming out —Tammy Tuck mid-winter.

Price: $12 What It Is: A liquid snack with half-smokeinfused Old Forester Bourbon, demerara syrup, chili bitters, and muddled grilled oranges. To get maximum half-smoke flavor, the bar team at Ten 01 grills the sausages before letting them bathe in bourbon for four and a half hours. Next, the mixture goes into a refrigerator for 12 to 14 hours so that the fat can coagulate and be strained and skimmed off the top, leaving only flavor behind. The bourbon is then used to make an old fashioned variation they’ve dubbed “Deliverance.”

What It Tastes Like: The morning after a night out—the kind that starts classy at Vinoteca, then gradually devolves into rooftop shenanigans at Brixton, beers at Solly’s, and finally make-out dancing in the sweaty Codmother basement before someone declares “Let’s get Ben’s!” In one gulp, Deliverance delivers a savory mix of spicy, smoky, sour, and salty. While Ten 01 gets major points in the novelty department, finishing one of these is as tricky as beating a hangover.

The Story: Ten 01 comes from the owners of Ben’s Chili Bowl. In fact, the new bar and restaurant is located on floors two and three above the H Street NE location of the D.C. institution. Ten 01’s bar area, with its hip chandeliers and attractive wood tables, looks completely different from the casual ketchup-and-mustard explosion of colors of Ben’s Chili Bowl below. “We wanted to somehow pay homage to downstairs, so we’re doing it with this drink and with the half-smoke and shrimp corn dogs,” says coowner Sonya Ali. Half-smokes, however, are better to eat than drink.

—Laura Hayes

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 15

GW LISNER PRESENTS

SPRING 2016 Billy Gibbons & The BFG’s

Flamenco Festival: Rocio Molina

with Tyler Bryant & the Shakedown

“Danzaora & VinAtica”

CORPORATE TEAM BUILDING

DuPont Circle

Teams of 2 up to 35

with one goal - getting out!

friday, mar 18 • 8pm

wednesday, jan 20 • 8pm

Ladysmith Black Mambazo

COMPETITION ROOMS

Flamenco Festival: Qasida

Find out what ToDo Today online.

saturday, mar 19 • 8pm

friday, feb 12 • 8pm

Johnny Clegg Adam Devine

wednesday, mar 23 • 8pm

saturday, feb 13 • 8pm

Rokia Traore

global FEST

with Sinkane

on the Road: Creole Carnival

friday, mar 25 • 8pm

friday, feb 19 • 8pm

Jose Gonzalez with yMusic

Swimming in Dark Waters:

saturday, mar 26 • 8pm

Other Voices of the American Experience featuring

Rhiannon Giddens, Leyla McCalla, & Bhi Bhiman

Bedroom Community 10 year anniversary: whale watching tour 2016 tuesday, mar 29 • 8pm

friday, feb 26 • 8pm

Anoushka Shankar Flamenco Festival: Farruquito “Improvisao” tuesday, mar 8 • 8pm

Fl amenco Festival: Ballet Flamenco de Andalucia

Co-presented with Washington Performing Arts friday, apr 1 • 8pm

Acoustic Africa – Habib Koite & Vusi Mahlasela thursday, apr 14 • 8pm

“Images: 20 years”

Buika

saturday, mar 12 • 8pm

saturday, apr 23 • 8pm

the world sounds better Visit lisner.gwu.edu or call 202.994.6800 for more information or to purchase tickets. /GWLISNER

in

here

New Year’s Eve Specials A rt And Soul

415 New Jersey Avenue NW, Washington, DC 20001 Artandsouldc.com | (202) 393-7777 Executive Chef Douglas Alexander has prepared a special three-course menu to welcome 2016. Dine on dishes such as our Steak Tartare, Braised Lamb Shank and Crème Brulee – while enjoying live jazz. $75 per person and $30 beverage pairings featuring specialty cocktails, premium wines, and craft beers.

A SiA nine - dC & Md

915 E Street NW, Washington, DC 20004 Asianine.com | (202) 629-4355 254 Crown Park Avenue, Gaithersburg, MD 20878 Asianinemd.com | (301) 330-9997 Asia Nine will be serving an a la carte menu and offering special New Year’s dishes, a complimentary champagne toast at midnight, and festive party items to ring in the New Year. Check out the website for our special menu items. Visit one of our locations in DC or MD to bring in 2016!

dBGB K itChen And BAr

931 H Street NW, Washington, DC 20001 DBGB.com/dc | (202) 695-7660 Live DJ, Chef Ed Scarpone’s Gala tasting menu and a Champagne toast at midnight are sure to make this New Year’s Eve an unforgettable experience. A La Carte Dining from 5-6:30pm. Gala Menu & Midnight Champagne Toast from 8:30-10pm. Four-Course Prix Fixe $90 per person.

Grill

froM

i pAneMA

1858 Columbia Road NW, Washington, DC 20009 Thegrillfromipanema.com | (202) 986-0757 Celebrate New Year’s Eve in Brazil without leaving Washington DC! We will be serving a La Carte Dining for reservations made from 4:30pm-7:00pm. Seating for our Reveillon Party starts at 9:00pm and live music show will go until 3:30am. NYE Package Includes a lavish Brazilian feast buffet with most popular and delicious appetizers, hot dishes, grilled meats, seafood, desserts, fruits, champagne, complimentary party favors, live band & dance show. Price $89 per person. Tables are getting booked quickly so make your reservations today to guarantee your spot!

Juniper r eStAurAnt

2401 M Street NW, Washington, DC Juniperdc.com | (202) 457-5020 Juniper is offering a 4 course prefixe dinner for $75 per person with option wine pairing of $45. Dinner includes oysters, lobster, striploin and more. Welcome in 2016 at Juniper Restaurant!

linColn

1110 Vermont Avenue NW, Washington, DC 20005 Lincolnrestaurant-dc.com | 202-386-9200 Our New Year’s Eve Party is always a highlight, and this year we’ll be ringing in 2016 in the heart of DC with friends into the wee hours! We offer party packages for whatever suits your fancy, including midnight champagne toast, savory cuisine, distinctive cocktails, party favors and entertainment options. At $60 or $75 per person, our pricing fits your New Year’s Eve party wishes.

riS

2275 L Street NW, Washington, DC 20037 Risdc.com | (202) 730-2500 Join us at RIS for our favorite night of the year! Chef Ris Lacoste and her team have created an unforgettable 7-course NYE menu for you. Our entire a la carte menu and holiday specials will also available. Share with us a midnight toast with all the bells and whistles to bring in the New Year. Seating is from 5pm and ends at 10:45pm.

Our staff awaits you! Call now for reservations!

Ser r eStAurAnt

1110 North Glebe Road, Arlington, VA 22201 Ser-Restaurant.com | (703) 746-9822 SER New Year’s Eve Gala 2016. Limited space for first and second seating’s. Please reserve by calling 703-746-9822 or our website. Validated parking below SER for $2 after 5PM.

tABernA del A lABArdero

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16 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

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CPARTS

Museums or tax shelters?

The Kreeger and Glenstone are under congressional investigation. washingtoncitypaper.com/go/museuminvestigation

MUSIC

Sound City The best local music of 2015

How do you define a year in music? Easy: You don’t. You could say that 2015 was the year of the comeback for D.C.-area artists, with bands like Beauty Pill, Soccer Team, and The Max Levine Ensemble releasing new music for the first time in years. You could also say that 2015 was the year newer artists had something to prove, with GoldLink, Reesa Renee, Big Hush, and others putting out excellent follow-ups to their muchhyped debuts. But again, these narratives are too convenient—music scenes don’t work like that. Musicians in the D.C. area (and elsewhere, as Oddisee is now Brooklyn-based, though his heart is still in the District) make their art whenever they can, in some cases balancing demanding day jobs with a passion for music. And that’s what’s most exciting about some of 2015’s best local music—ingenuity, passion, creativity, determination, and brilliant musicianship oozes from each one of these releases. I guess that’s —Matt cohen something like a definition.

AkuA Allrich

Soul Singer Self-released Despite the title, Akua Allrich’s Soul Singer is not an R&B effort. Though it draws from that genre, the album’s title is more reflective of her feel, whether she’s stretching out her gospel wings over swinging jazz stylings, scatting, or even careening around the scales with a bit of a gravelly edge. On Soul Singer, Allrich passionately stretches and pulls notes without ever losing control of the tunes on —Steve kiviat this lively collection.

BeAuty Pill

Beauty Pill Describes Things As They Are Butterscotch Records This time last year, Chad Clark was cautiously optimistic about his band’s upcoming album. Sure, he loved how the record turned out, but he knew it was sonically dense and a really tough listen. Beauty Pill’s previous work is more straightforward; Beauty Pill Describes Things As They Are is full of textured electronica and serious themes. Among other topics, the album seems driven by the concept of time— the need for more of it and the serenity of watching it drift away.

The album’s opening statement—“I want

more life, fucker,” a line from Blade Runner— speaks to frontman Chad Clark’s well-documented health struggles and his proclamation to move forward. Time was the enemy on “Dog with Rabbit in Mouth, Unharmed”: Clark’s dog, Lucy, was dying of cancer, and he was slowly coming to grips with her demise.

It’s a gorgeous and indulgent album, and the quintet thoughtfully conveys each idea using bright collages and airy vocals.

Released in April, Beauty Pill Describes Things As They Are has earned widespread acclaim from the likes of Pitchfork, NPR, and Rolling Stone, which is high praise considering Clark’s uneasiness before the LP’s release. “I feel very encouraged,” he says. “I’m a middle-aged black man, and I just made a record that seems to be well received in the indie-rock world, and I’m an artist with a capital A. My situation is weird, but it’s as positive as it could be at this moment.” That said, Clark doesn’t want to produce Beauty Pill’s next album, for which he’s already started writing. Clark’s hoping for a striped-down sound that’s easier to digest. “I would like to work with someone else who understands the band’s vision,” he says. “To work within what’s essentially a narrow confine, and still make something that’s totally free and from the heart, that’s what I’d like to do with the —Marcus J. Moore next record.”

Big huSh

Br’er

BleSS

couP SAuvAge & the SniPS

Who’s Smoking Your Spirit?

DZ Tapes What’s most impressive about Big Hush’s Who’s Smoking Your Spirit? is the band’s fierce drive to reinvent itself. On last year’s Wholes, the local quartet explored a twangy, reverbheavy sound, as if it had just completed a Ph.D. dissertation in shoegaze. With a shoegaze revival in full swing, it’d be easy for the band to keep milking that sound, but instead it forged ahead, exploring new sonic soundscapes that are far noisier—and poppier—than —Matt cohen anything it’s done before.

Bless Tape Self-released The quirky appeal of garage-rock trio Bless is on full display throughout its debut EP. The guitar riffs and affected lead vocals of vocalist/guitarist Luke Reddick never take themselves too seriously in the EP’s six songs, and yet perhaps oddly, it makes them all the more effective. What’s even more surprising though, is that such an accomplished short album could come out of a group that was just —Jerome langston formed this year.

Masking Blight Records Frontman Ben Schurr has described the title track on the industrial-pop band’s newest album as a “danceable nightmare.” In a lot of respects, this mentality extends to the entire album: It’s significantly more accessible than the rest of Br’er’s oeuvre, but that doesn’t mean it’s any less complex. Schurr and Erik Sleight’s crushing synths collide with Ben Usie’s dance-beat drumming to create a soundtrack fit for the most hellish —keith Mathias discotheque.

Psalms From Ward 9 Haus of Sauvage Coup Sauvage & The Snips occupy an aggressively unique space on the musical map, but for its Psalms From Ward 9 EP, the sextet focused on perhaps the most universal element of its sound: get butts moving. J.D. Samson of MEN offers up a remix that makes the already punchy “Don’t Touch My Hair” runway ready, and the songs only get catchier. Psalms might capture The Snips’ love for a good rhythm, but it doesn’t de-emphasize

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 17

MUSIC its social commentary, pulling no punches when it comes to expressing disdain for rac—valerie Paschall ism and rudeness.

goldlink

And After That, We Didn’t Talk Soulection A few days after announcing the title of his debut album, And After That, We Didn’t Talk, during a sold-out show at the 9:30 Club, GoldLink was hesitant to explain it.

“A heartbreak,” he said. “It’s just about a heartbreak.” Heartbreak plays a leading role in the album’s narrative, but And After That, We Didn’t Talk is a dive into the 22year-old’s identity: It’s GoldLink’s comingof-age story.

What do you remember most about high school? Your embarrassing-in-hindsight sartorial choices? The prom? Graduation? For GoldLink, it was a relationship that began when he was 16 and left a dent on his psyche so deep that it inspired the soul-searching of And After That, We Didn’t Talk. On opener “After You Left,” GoldLink’s mind races from the breakup to the emptiness of success in life’s grand scheme (“I made $100,000 this year/ That still don’t mean shit,” he concedes). Guided by a prominent Missy Elliott sample, the bouncy “Spectrum” is reflective. “I learned a lot in such a short amount of time,” he announces at the song’s onset before detailing the accelerated course in life lessons he received during his formative years. The project ends with “See I Miss,” where the subtle hum of Merg’s production underscores GoldLink’s remorse about the relationship’s failure and its lasting effect on other areas of his life.

And After That, We Didn’t Talk begins with the impact of a car collision and fades out quietly, an accurate depiction of the post-breakup stages of grief. Where his lauded debut, The God Complex, was a genre-warping display of what GoldLink can do, its successor is an exploration of who he is and why. Last year, GoldLink unmasked himself. Now, he’s letting us all inside of his head.

—Julian kimble

heMlineS

All Your Homes DZ Tapes In 2015, Hemlines glowed from its pedestal as one of the best bands in years to hoist the flag of feminist punk in D.C. Its blistering five-song EP, All Your Homes, announces the band and vocalist/guitarist Katie Park as an artery pulsing with rage and power. There’s real dexterity here; Hemlines shifts from easy to rough, from sunnier no-wave guitar work from Park and fellow guitarist Ian Villeda, to roaring distortion and big chords,

all backed by Dana Liebelson’s bass high in the mix and the rock-steady drums of scene veteran Julie Yoder.

Yoder has anchored the band in myriad ways. Last year, most of Hemlines was cast about in D.C.’s punk scene, all having come from different worlds, musical or otherwise.

Yoder helped shepherd them through. This summer, on a formative East Coast tour, Yoder grieved the loss of her father, who died this year; the band departed for the tour a day after his birthday, and she struggled through tricky personal moments that had nothing to do with

hoMoSuPerior

The Mall Madness Demo Self-released No other local release this year simultaneously scuzzed and ripped as hard Homosuperior’s excellent, cheeky Mall Madness Demo. Through a wall of fuzzed-out distortion, vocalist Josh Vogelsong speedily wails and moans about youth, queer identity, and, uh, getting high on this polished demo. As its title suggests, there’s nostalgia for the bygone era of mall culture in these songs, but Homosuperior’s sound is anything —Matt cohen but irrelevant.

louiS WeekS

haha Self-released In the hands of a less skilled musician and songwriter, the expansive sonic ideas of haha, the stellar follow-up to Weeks’ acclaimed 2014 debut, shift/away, would have choked on its own ambition. But in haha, Weeks— along with guitarist Noah Berman, drummer Matt Honor, and Ethan Helm on woodwinds—excels with its lush, cinematic soundscapes, thoughtfully reflective lyrics, and numerous surprising “turns” throughout its 11 compositions. —Jerome langston

the MAx levine enSeMBle

Backlash, Baby Lame-O Records/Rumbletowne Records The three members of the Max Levine Ensemble are in their early 30s, which is old enough to know how messy life can get regardless of how many other people want them to get their shit together. The energetic Backlash, Baby, the band’s first album in nearly a decade, hits hard in part because vocalist/guitarist David Combs captures those woes with a mix of chaos and aplomb; bashing out music that sounds disheveled, but the notes bend to the band’s will. It stirs up infectious, clean, power-pop vocal harmonies too, but it makes —leor galil falling apart sound magical.

More huMAnS

Hot Cloud Self-released With Hot Cloud, it’s clear that More Humans spent much of the late ’90s and early aughts burning the nuances of alternative and indie rock into its consciousness. There’s a familiarity to Hot Cloud that doesn’t point directly back to one source; the melodies echo everything from Jawbox to Pinback to My Morning Jacket. Rather, the songs evoke the feeling of uncertainty and tension that remain latent in the actions and thoughts of young adults.

—valerie Paschall

the oBSeSSiveS

the band. But she says she feels fortunate to have her bandmates, who all balance demanding day jobs with the pure pleasure of making music together.

“It feels like despite vast differences in backgrounds and geographic locations, we were all raised in similar ways or something” she says. To Yoder, her bandmates feel like the punk-rock children she would have raised if she’d been a teen mom. For a collection of relative strangers, there’s perhaps no more stark sign of cohesion.

So what’s next? A full-length record, perhaps. More touring. Its sound may shift, but that’s OK, Park says. “We don’t want to feel too limited by what we’ve already done or what we should sound like, so I’d say our musical focus right now is playing what feels —ron knox good to us.”

18 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

MAkeShift ShelterS

Something So Personal Broken World Media D.C.’s music community had its collective heart broken in June when blossoming emo-punks Makeshift Shelters announced the band had dissolved. Early this year, the Northern Virginia fourpiece gave onlookers ample reason to believe its dazzling debut full-length, Something So Personal, would usher in years of smart, big-hearted power-pop framing vocalist Ella Boissonnault’s pitch-perfect vocals. Makeshift Shelters gave the city one of the year’s great records, a blast of joyous and jilted rock that bathed the scene in a lasting light even if the band departed just as quickly as it arrived.

—ron knox

Heck No, Nancy Near Mint Records Early on The Obsessives’ debut album, frontman Nick Bairatchnyi glumly sings “Zooming out on Google Earth / I become even less significant.” It’s a simple lyric, but on the record it ripples, and every muted guitar lick magnifies a teenage existentialism particular to the Snapchat generation. Age won’t restrict anyone from digging into this thoughtful, taut fourth-wave emo album—Bairatchnyi and drummer Jackson Mansfield didn’t let their perspectives close them off from considering life on this globe far beyond their circle.

—leor galil

oddiSee

The Good Fight Mello Music Group On The Good Fight, Oddisee eschews rap superstardom for frank honesty. The result is one of the year’s most revealing listens; more of an album-as-acceptance-of-situation than a bombastic, pop-aimed song collection. A decade into a successful independent career, The Good Fight, as Oddisee told Billboard, celebrates “living fully as a musician without succumbing to the traps of hedonism, avarice, and materialism.” That’s certainly something from left field in the modern rap

MUSIC environment, and Oddisee’s mastery both behind the boards and the microphone contin—Marcus k. dowling ues to dazzle.

the oooh child enSeMBle

Rebirth Afrocentric Asian Music After years of playing keys for other musicians, pianist/keyboardist Andrew Flores (aka Drew Kid) stepped out on his own on Rebirth, an impressive six-song album dedicated to his deceased mother and aunt. It’s technically jazz, but parts of the album lean toward hip-hop and soul. “I really wasn’t sure how folks were going to react,” Flores says. “All the different styles might be confusing to some, though I made sure—at least in my own ear— that there was some kind of cohesiveness.”

Rebirth is a family-oriented release: Frequent collaborators yU and Drew Dave appear on the album’s final cut, and the title track (featuring a standout poem from OutKast contributor Big Rube) speaks to the struggles of everyday folks. There’s a strong sense of community here, punctuated by phone audio of Flores’ mother throughout the album. “Rebirth is one way to view death, but it also refers to how I had to live after my folks died,” Flores says. “I had to wake the fuck up, still go to school, and face whatever else was coming my way.”

Flores says he’s working on a solo album— not like Rebirth, which he recorded as leader of The Oooh Child Ensemble. “Despite the content, I’m actually really excited about this music,” he says of the forthcoming work.

“This album is a lot more soul than Rebirth.

My heart got broken pretty bad this year so yeah, I’ve been dealing with that. At least now I have all these songs.” —Marcus J. Moore

is hardcore? Not in D.C.: Sounds from other nooks of the extreme music world have infiltrated the thriving D.C. hardcore scene and cracked the hegemony of straight-ahead, rocket-fast punk. Now, D.C. hardcore is thrash, sort of, and it’s death metal, sort of; it’s whatever the new wave scene says it is.

Exhibit A: Red Death’s bombastic Permanent Exile, with pin-prick solos and chugging riffs over blastbeats—until the bottom drops out, the drums rumble and the record gets hair—ron knox swinging heavy.

she calls “great muses”—Renee adroitly uses melisma and repetition to make her sunny vocal hooks rise over perky and funky rhythms.

On “Reminder,” she beautifully stretches out the end of syllables before adding some quick-tempoed rapped verses. With “Hello Mama,” the repetition of the word “ride” morphs into a catchy, high-flying hook. Renee gets the most mileage out of nearly every word she sings and raps; a rare fête that proves pa—Steve kiviat tience is quite the virtue.

trio ooo

Days To Be Told New Atlantis Records Trio OOO bassist Luke Stewart is among those who prefers the broad moniker “creative music” for what he and his compatriots do—and with Days To Be Told, it isn’t hard to see why. Stewart, drummer Sam Lohman, and alto saxophonist Aaron Martin aren’t merely creating their own melodicharmonic-rhythmic combinations, they’re creating the parameters, the contexts, and the basis for those combinations—and making them accessible without condescension.

—Michael J. West

Polyon

Blue Funny/Not Funny Records The most common association between music and science fiction is John Williams’ score for Star Wars: regal, precise, and welcoming. It’s a perfect fit for the films, which are a space opera tinged with nostalgia. Polyon makes music that genuinely sounds like what it would be like to be in space; with its Blue EP, that sound morphs with guitar pop that’s moody, distorted, atmospheric, and above all, loud. Another science fiction film famously noted, “In space, no one can hear you scream.” Thanks to Polyon, we can’t hear because it rocks so hard.

—Alan Zilberman

red deAth

Permanent Exile Grave Mistake Records Punk rock is often mired in identity dogma.

What’s that old refrain? Hardcore is hardcore

igan for school, but the band didn’t end. In the five years he was away, he and bassist/ vocalist Melissa Quinley continued to share and swap ideas for the band. When Nelson moved back to the D.C. area in 2012, he and Melissa quickly started working on the songs that make up Real Lessons. Enlisting the help of drummer Dennis Kane and multi-instrumentalist Jason Hutto, Soccer Team started putting together the songs on Real Lessons, which exudes a kind of airy, nonchalant coolness.

On songs like “Best Employed New Beau” and “Too Many Lens Flares,” Nelson and Quinley riff on cultural qualms like the exhausting vapidness of journalistic integrity and the sorry state of the cinema (while not-so-subtly taking digs at J.J. Abrams’ signature filming technique) over a cascade of shimmering guitar parts and driving bass riffs. The songs might come off as Soccer Team’s “Old Man Yells At Cloud” album, but it’s a ruse: They come from a place of detached amusement at certain situations rather than strong messages. “At no point do I feel like giving up on humanity,” Nelson says. “Then again, if Trump becomes president, well… I reserve the right to eat —Matt cohen my words.”

reeSA renee

Lovers Rock Self-released Lovers Rock, Reesa Renee says, was her reintroduction. It’s been three years since the “Amateur Night at the Apollo” winner’s notable debut, Reelease, and the vocalist spent the downtime perfecting her craft. “A few of the songs [on Lovers Rock] were created [in the] summer of 2013 when my brother and I went on a one-month creative binge,” Renee says. “We pretty much immersed ourselves in the studio and created nonstop.”

The immersion paid off. Whereas Reelease found Renee all over the map—getting jazzy here, old-school rapping there, and buoyantly trilling elsewhere—Lovers Rock focused largely on upbeat, Pharrell Williams–inspired pop R&B. Collaborating with four producers— Reggie Volume, Wess, AB, and P. Kay, whom

Soccer teAM

Real Lessons In Cynicism Dischord Records It’s right there in the album’s title, but Soccer Team, vocalist/guitarist Ryan Nelson insists, is not a cynical band. “It comes more from a place of humor or general interest in the kinds of stories, situations, or characters addressed in the songs,” he says.

“We’re really not jaded or embittered people.” And that’s how best to interpret the songs on Soccer Team’s excellent sophomore album; cheeky observations and qualms rather than cynical musings from a jaded bunch.

The story of Real Lessons in Cynicism goes something like this: Not long after Soccer Team’s 2006 debut, “Volunteered” Civility and Professionalism, Nelson moved to Mich-

WAle

The Album About Nothing Maybach Music Group/Atlantic Records Waiting for Wale’s The Album About Nothing felt very much like waiting for a six-year vision to be realized. While his previous efforts—The Mixtape About Nothing and More About Nothing— stand out as some of his best work, The Album About Nothing cements and builds upon the foundation already laid, revealing Wale as a man tormented by depression, insecurities, failed relationships, and a reality that falls short of his own aspirations. With Jerry Seinfeld narrating the journey—a criminally understated achievement for any rapper—Wale returns to his most beloved form, more honest than he’s ever been.

—Briana younger

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 19

FILM

Reel and Spectacular

Tricia Olszewski and Noah Gittell’s favorite films of 2015 In a year in which the roar about gender inequality in Hollywood reached Jurassic World decibels, a different story played out onscreen. From Ex Machina to Star Wars: The Force Awakens, girl power may not have exactly dominated in 2015 (let’s not get carried away) but strong women—whether cis, trans, or robotic—were represented in noticeable numbers: There was Katniss, of course. Furiosa. Ava. Rey. Ma. Carol. Eilis. Kate from Sicario. Lili from The Danish Girl.

Not all of these characters elevated their films to best-of status in my eyes (sorry, I was somehow left empty by the admittedly gorgeous Mad Max: Fury Road), but they, along with their writers, are to be applauded nonetheless.

Here are five features and documentaries, in no particular order, that entertained me, stunned me, and kept me rapt. Yes, it’s largely a boys’ club.

—Tricia Olszewski But ladies, keep making those leaps.

99 Homes

umentary also gives Winehouse the respect that many may not have known she deserved.

An incredible jazz singer and aficionado who nearly fell to her knees during a duet with Tony Bennett, Winehouse was more than a drunk who fumbled the words to “Rehab.”

She loved music, and she had the chops—the copious home-movie footage presented here proves as much. Above all, she had a lovely personality, one tragically snuffed by the disease of addiction.

JAMes White

This under-the-radar film tells a story both intimate and universal, anchored by performances so astonishing you’re never reminded of the celebrated (and oddly similar) series that lent its stars the limelight. Christopher Abbott is remarkable as James, a 20-year-old New Yorker who’s typical in his desire to party and quickness to fight anyone who crosses him. James is also the sole caretaker of his terminally ill mother (Cynthia Nixon), a responsibility that repeatedly clashes with his lifestyle. Honest yet without an ounce of sentimentality, James White should propel Abbott to the moon for his ferocious, finely tuned portrayal of a young man trying to cope with a torrent of emotions and stress, his expressions betraying his thoughts even when his words communicate something different.

99 hoMes

Mississippi Grind

When your story needs a snake, find Michael Shannon. This timely film about the subprime mortgage crisis offers Shannon as a real estate broker specializing in foreclosures; he tosses families, the elderly, and every homeowner in between out on the street without a flicker of remorse. Matching Shannon’s intensity is Andrew Garfield, demonstrating a surprising range as a young dad who loses his house and then works with Shannon’s broker to earn it back. Ethics, hypocrisy, fury, and sorrow infuse every frame, with a nearly unbearable number of scenes hitting deeper than the basic plot could ever warn.

James White

In this road-trip story about a couple of gamblers, Ben Mendelsohn’s troubled Gerry has holes in his pockets but lights in his eyes. When he makes fast friends with Curtis (Ryan Reynolds, in a grown-up, fleshed-out role that allows him to be charming, wise, and refined), Gerry may initially be attracted

by Curtis’ apparent status as his lucky charm, but their bond is the kind of bromance that the likes of Seth Rogen and James Franco have thus far only joked about. Co-directors Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck infuse this richly respectful chronicle of a jaunt down South with a soundtrack of classic R&B and blues, seducing you to get lost with these men whether in lit-up casinos, dark bars, or history-rich towns that swell with nostalgia.

rooM

AMy

To casual fans only familiar with Back to Black, Amy Winehouse was a deep-voiced novelty who quickly turned into a late-night punchline. “What a mess,” you probably

20 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

thought, not the least bit surprised by the news of her death. And though Amy, by necessity, follows the fame-to-misfortune story line common to nearly all gifted celebrities who were gone too soon, Asif Kapadia’s doc-

Here’s Ma. And with her is her five-year-old son, with whom she lives in a shed, which is the only place the boy’s ever known. Brie Larson and a precocious Jacob Tremblay portray a family of two negotiating a precarious situation that’s made bearable by Ma’s ingenuity, calling their entire world “room” and telling him stories about what they see on television, what’s beyond the skylight, and why he must hide when the man visits each night. Room, adapted from a novel, is a gripping, tense, and ultimately spirit-raising tale about survival and the ability for love to exist under the bleakest of circumstances—with a complementary message that a life without physical restriction doesn’t automatically mean a life without pain.

FILM SpoTlighT

Spotlight

It’s not the flashiest movie of the year but it’s easily the most competent—and maybe the most important. Writer/director Tom McCarthy avoids sensationalizing his provocative film about the real-life Boston Globe investigation into child abuse in the Catholic Church.

Instead of delving into the inner lives of his team of journalist protagonists (played with efficient charm by Michael Keaton, Rachel McAdams, and Mark Ruffalo, among others) or offering lurid details of the abuse, Spotlight is a taut procedural and probably the best film ever made on the value of research. It’s also an ode to—and perhaps an elegy for—longform journalism at a time when it needs the support more than ever.

45 yearS

Movies about elderly British people practically form their own genre these days, but 45 Years transcends any label or category. Charlotte Rampling and Tom Courtenay star as a couple whose long-time marriage receives an unexpected blow. The film by director Andrew The world has been a weird and scary place this year. Maybe that’s why I found myself gravitating towards such earnest, optimistic films. With a few exceptions, the heroes of my top films find hope and happiness at the end of long, often painful journeys. These happy endings aren’t superficial. With diligent direction, skillful screenwriting, and empathetic acting, these films create their own optimism through their characters—not around them.

And they fulfill the most basic function of cinema: to bring a little light into our dark world.

—Noah Gittell

Brooklyn

Brooklyn

Old-fashioned filmmaking at its finest: Director James Crowley’s portrait of a young Irish immigrant finding her way in 1950s New York doesn’t break any new ground, but the film’s overwhelming sense of common decency makes it feel revelatory anyway. As a young woman torn between homes on either side of the Atlantic, Saoirse Ronan gives a simple and powerfully open-hearted performance that encapsulates the film’s earnest sensibility. It’s a story your grandmother will love; a feel-good movie that earns every bit of its feeling.

The look of Silence

Have you ever been watching two people talk and become absolutely convinced that one was about to murder the other? This occurs several times in Joshua Oppenheimer’s brilliant and vital documentary. It’s a companion piece to 2013’s The Act of Killing, a film that brought to light the Indonesian genocide of 1965. But while The Act of Killing relied on formal experiments—Oppenheimer had the killers act out their crimes in the style of their favorite Hollywood movies—The Look of Silence tells

its tragic story with a human face: a mild-mannered optometrist (and son of a victim) who, one-by-one, confronts the crime’s perpetrators, who remain in power. That he ultimately finds salvation in the aftermath of such unholy deeds is a minor miracle, and so is the film.

Magic Mike XXl

This sequel directed by Gregory Jacobs is easily the most subversive movie of the year, upending everything we expect from Hollywood

blockbusters. It’s a story about male strippers, but the subject is female pleasure, which Hollywood (and the MPAA ratings board) typically has no tolerance for. It features an agreeably rambling narrative more akin to a European road movie than a tightly plotted studio film. Finally, there’s its unconventional ending: a joyous performance in front of thousands of women that would probably be a tense, high-stakes competition in other films. In Magic Mike XXL, it’s not about winning. It’s all about the dance.

Haigh (Weekend, HBO’s Looking) is a perceptive drama about mortality and the fragility of human relationships. The two leads are magnificent, and the film’s final scene is one for the ages. Rampling’s character undergoes a subtle but devastating transformation in a crowded CP room, and only the audience sees it.

Read more of Olszewski and Gittell’s top films of 2015 at washingtoncitypaper.com/go/bestfilms2015.

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 21

photography

More Than Words

Don’t expect uplift from many of the best photographs exhibited in the D.C. area this past year. Whether it’s dread spawned by omnipresent surveillance, the tattered remains of the clothes of missing persons, or the drudgery of low-income work in America, photographers on the following list not only bore witness to important topics but did so with an artistic flair. In descending order, here are my picks for the five best photographic images exhibited in 2015.

—Louis Jacobson

1. Jens sundheim

images from “The Traveller” series What’s special about Sundheim’s work, included in Goethe-Institut’s “Surveillance Blind” exhibit, isn’t its visual polish. Rather, it’s the artist’s relentless pursuit of an urgent and fully coherent concept. Sundheim craftily and resourcefully short-circuits Big Brother, giving him a big poke in the eye for good measure. He locates surveillance cameras, travels there, poses, then secures a screenshot of himself on camera.

2. Fred ramos

images from “el Último atuendo de los desaparecidos” series Ramos, who has shown work at Hillyer Art Space, photographs carefully arranged articles of clothing discovered in the unmarked graves of missing persons in El Salvador. Stand back a few steps and the image could pass for a fashion ad in a trendy magazine. Look closely, though, and the message turns sharply poignant, a case study in tracing the fine line between beautiful and horrific.

3. Paul Graham

images from “a shimmer of Possibility” series A decade ago, British documentarian Paul Graham photographed Americans on the economic edge. A portion of that project resurfaced this year in “Celebrating Photography at the National Gallery of Art: Recent Gifts,” which documents a laborer mowing a steep field in a commercial strip, interspersed with images of cans of food stocked in a presumably low-rent grocery store.

It concisely encapsulates both Sisyphean labor and its meager rewards.

4. moyra davey

images from “Copperhead” series Davey’s penny project, now a quarter-century old, was the best of several brainy photographic experiments in the National Gallery of Art’s exhibit “The Memory of Time.” With extreme close-ups of randomly selected—and deeply battered—pennies, she produced not only compelling visuals (who knew there were so many different ways a penny could become scarred?) but also a meditation on Abraham Lincoln’s place in history.

5. aCaCia Johnson

images from “under the same stars” exhibition Johnson has extensively documented one of the most remote places on Earth—the north shore of Baffin Island, in the Canadian province of Nunavut. For her exhibit at the Canadian Embassy, she used an old-school technique—a large-format camera and color film—to photograph eight figures in heavy parkas standing amid the midwinter gloom. They stare calmly at something unknown behind the photographer, as if they were characters in Close Encounters of the Third Kind—a mesmerizing and enigmatic image from a profoundly lonely-looking place.

See more of Jacobson’s top images of 2015 at washingtoncitypaper.com/go/topimages2015.

22 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

From top left, counterclockwise: “Full Moon, February” (5); “Pittsburgh, 2004” (3); from “Copperhead” series (4); from “El Último Atuendo de los Desaparecidos” (2); “Franklin D. Roosevelt Drive, New York City, USA” (1)

AREYOUAWINNER?

PROvEIt!

NATIONAL SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA COMES TO DOWNTOWN & PENN QUARTER!

FREE

CON

Visit washingtoncitypaper.com/promotions and enter to win anything from movie tickets to spa treatments!

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JANUARY 5–11, 2016

INTERLOCHEN

AUDITIONS MUSIC

DANCE

THEATRE

ARTS BOARDING HIGH SCHOOL • SUMMER ARTS CAMP

FREE, NO TICKETS REQUIRED

JAN. 9 AT 2 FAMILY CONCERT Smithsonian American Art Museum Kogod Courtyard

Michael Butterman, conductor Marissa Regni, violinist and co-host

JAN. 9 AT 7:30 COMMUNITY CONCERT

EVEN MORE FREE CONCERTS

Featuring NSO musicians in various combinations playing at:

Smithsonian American Art Museum Kogod Courtyard

SATURDAY, JAN. 16

Francesco Lecce-Chong, conductor

Washington National Opera

FREE, GENERAL ADMISSION

6925 Willow St., NW Washington, DC 20012

CERTS!

JAN. 10 AT 7 AN EVENING OF CHAMBER MUSIC with the Kennedy Center Chamber Players

Sixth & I

Seating is limited and on a first-come, first-served basis.

RSVP at sixthandi.org.

Busboys and Poets Calvary Baptist Church Central Union Mission Corcoran School of the Arts and Design First Congregational United Church of Christ International Spy Museum Martin Luther King Jr. Memorial Library National Building Museum Renaissance Washington, DC Downtown Hotel Shakespeare Theatre Company Washington DC Jewish Community Center (DCJCC) Woolly Mammoth Theatre and many more locations!

For a full schedule and more information, please visit

kennedy-center.org/nsoneighborhood David and Alice Rubenstein are the Presenting Underwriters of the NSO. The National Symphony Orchestra’s Community Engagement Program is made possible through the generosity of Mrs. Irene Pollin.

Additional support is provided by Linda and Tobia Mercuro, The Morris and Gwendolyn Cafritz Foundation, Paul M. Angell Family Foundation, and Tina and Albert Small Jr.

PRE-REGISTER AT: www.interlochen.org/audition2016

NSO In Your Neighborhood: Downtown/Penn Quarter is sponsored by Wells Fargo.

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 23

I.M.P. PRESENTS 1215 U Street NW

THISDECEMBER WEEK’S SHOWS #YASQUEEN: for the+ Holidays with Ex Hex w/ MacHomo McCaughan the Non Believers & Ed Schrader’s Music Beat ... Th 10 DJ Deedub DJ Rich MimAronovitch • Tayylor Made .....................................................................

26 Jim Breuer• w/ This is a seated show. ........................................Sa F 11

The Pietasters w/ The Slackers &JANUARY Combs ...........................................................Sa 12 The Arcs w/ Mariachi Flor de Toloache .................................................................Tu 15 GOGOL BORDELLO San Fermin Sam Amidon .....................................................................................

WF16 Gypsy Punks:w/ Underdog World Strike Set w/ Chicano Batman.............................

1

w/ Chicano Batman ...................................................................................................... Sa 2

NPR MUSIC PRESENTS

All Songs Considered’s Sweet 16 Celebration with performances by Dan Deacon, Sharon Van Etten + very special guests.

Bob Boilen + Robin Hilton host. ............................................................................ W 13

STEEZ PROMO PRESENTS Marshmello................................................................................................................. Th 14 ALL GOOD PRESENTS Lettuce w/ Rome Fortune ........................................................................................... F 15 AEG LIVE PRESENTS Bridget Everett This is a seated show. Early Show! 6pm Doors ..................... Sa 16

The Knocks w/ Cardiknox & Sofi Tukker Late Show! 10pm Doors..................Sa 16 Dark & Twisted featuring Ultra Nate .............................................................Su 17 Alessia Cara w/ Kevin Garrett & Craig Stickland Early Show! 6pm Doors ......Su 24 U STREET MUSIC HALL PRESENTS

Miami Horror Late Show! 10pm Doors ................................................................. Su 24 Queensryche w/ Meytal & Halcyon Way ..........................................................M 25 Ani DiFranco w/ Hamell On Trial ...................................................................Tu 26 Josh Abott Band ............................................................................................Th 28 Super Diamond ...............................................................................................F 29 No Scrubs: ‘90s Dance Party with DJs Will Eastman and Brian Billion........Sa 30

White Ford Bronco ........................................ NEW YEAR’S EVE! Complimentary Champagne - Toast at Midnight!

STORY DISTRICT’S

Top Shelf ........................................................................................................JANUARY 9

STORY DISTRICT’S

Sucker For Love ....................................................................................FEBRUARY 13

AEG PRESENTS

R5 w/ Ryland & Parade of Lights ...................................................................FEBRUARY 23 Laurie Berkner Band...........................................................................FEBRUARY 28 Pat Green & Randy Rogers Band......................................................... MARCH 3 Vicente Amigo ................................................................................................. MARCH 6 Natalia Lafourcade All 10/22 tickets will be honored. .............................. MARCH 24 Joe Satriani .........................................................................................................APRIL 2 93.9 WKYS AND MAJIC 102.3 PRESENT

Plastic Cup Boyz .............................................................................................. MAY 29 • thelincolndc.com •

Ratatat w/ Jackson and His Computerband ................................................... JANUARY 16 Umphrey’s McGee w/ Tauk ........................................................... FEBRUARY 12 Coheed and Cambria w/ Glassjaw • I the Mighty • Silver Snakes . MARCH 2 Logic w/ Dizzy Wright ............................................................................................... MARCH 31 2135 Queens Chapel Rd. NE • Ticketmaster

BLURRED PRESENTS: SHIP2SHIP TOUR FEATURING

Verizon Center • Washington D.C.

Destructo & Justin Martin w/ Rezz .............................................................. W 3 Greensky Bluegrass (Th 4 - w/ Horseshoes and Hand Grenades) .. Th 4 • F 5 • Sa 6 Lupe Fiasco .................................................................................................... Su 7

Muse w/ X Ambassadors.....................................................................FEBRUARY 1 Ticketmaster

ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Joe Russo’s Almost Dead............................................................................W 10 Big Head Todd and the Monsters w/ Mike Doughty ................................Th 11 Graveyard w/ Spiders Early Show! 6pm Doors ................................................F 12 STEEZ PROMO PRESENTS SNAILIN USA TOUR PT. 2 FEATURING

Snails w/ Must Die ...........................................................................................F 12 ALL GOOD PRESENTS

The Devil Makes Three w/ Langhorne Slim ................................... Sa 13 & Su 14 Best Coast & Wavves w/ Cherry Glazerr ......................................................Tu 16 Unknown Mortal Orchestra w/ Lower Dens .................................................W 17

MANY MORE SHOWS ON SALE!

9:30 CUPCAKES

930.com

U Street (Green/Yellow) stop across the street!

Echostage • Washington, D.C.

FEBRUARY

ALL GOOD PRESENTS

Washington, D.C.

Merriweather Post Pavilion • Columbia, MD ALL LAWN TIX COMBO ONLY $150 FOR

FOUR SHOWS!

JASON ALDEAN...................................................... MAY 7 KENNY CHESNEY ..................................................MAY 19 MIRANDA LAMBERT .................................... AUGUST 25 WPOC WEEKEND IN THE COUNTRY.......... DATE TBA

Buy one ticket, attend four shows. Sit in the same seat each show!

Discounted total price vs. buying separately. Don’t get shut out by the sellouts.

Grab your spot in the front of the line now! Yee haw!

The best thing you could possibly put in your mouth Cupcakes by BUZZ... your neighborhood bakery in Alexandria, VA. | www.buzzonslaters.com

Twenty One Pilots.............................................................................JUNE 10 Ellie Goulding.................................................................................................. JUNE 13 The Cure w/ The Twilight Sad .............................................................................. JUNE 22 • For full lineups and more info, visit merriweathermusic.com • 930.com

9:30 CLUB PRESENTS AT U STREET MUSIC HALL Wet ................................................W JAN 27 Kat Dahlia .....................................W FEB 17 Hey Marseilles w/ Bad Bad Hats...F FEB 12 Vinyl Theatre & Finish Ticket SafetySuit w/ Connell Cruise.............. Tu 16 w/ Irontom ........................................... Tu 23 • Buy advance tickets at the 9:30 Club box office

Tickets for 9:30 Club shows are available through TicketFly.com, by phone at 1-877-4FLY-TIX, and at the 9:30 Club box office.

9:30 CLUB BOX OFFICE HOURS are 12-7PM Weekdays & Until 11PM on show nights. 6-11PM on Sat & 6-10:30PM on Sun on show nights.

9:30 CUPCAKES The best thing you could possibly put in your mouth.

Cupcakes by BUZZ... your neighborhood bakery in Alexandria, VA. www.buzzbakery.com

24 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

PARKING: THE OFFICIAL 9:30 parking lot entrance is on 9th Street, directly behind the 9:30 club. Buy your advance parking tickets at the same time as your concert tickets!

HAPPY HOUR DRINK PRICES

AFTER THE SHOW AT THE BACK BAR!

930.com

INER

60S-INSPIRED D Serving

EVERYTHING from BURGERS to BOOZY SHAKES

HAPPY HOUR:

$2 Tuesday $3 Thursday $4 Friday (ALL DRAFTS AND RAIL)

MOVIES & MOONSHINE BRING IN YOUR TICKET

STUB FROM ATLANTIC PLUMBING’S LANDMARK CINEMA FOR A

CITYLIST New Year’s eve

ArtJAmz New YeAr’s eve Glitter BAll Ring in the new year by creating a new painting at this interactive celebration. Tickets include canvasses and materials, plus party favors, snacks, and a toast at midnight. ArtJamz. 1742 Connecticut Ave. NW. $65–$105. Dec. 31, 10 p.m. (202) 709-8096.

THE HATEFUL 8

JohN KAdleciK BANd Welcome 2016 at Old Ebbitt Grill with a performance by the acclaimed jam guitarist. Presented in collaboration with Boston Beer Company. Old Ebbitt Grill. 675 15th St. NW. $30–$44.25. Dec. 31, 10 p.m. (202) 347-4800. melloN GAlA Walk the red carpet outside this black tie gala featuring five separate party spaces, music from DJs Spinser Tracy and RI5E, and party favors for all. Andrew W. Mellon Auditorium. 1301 Constitution Ave. NW. $129. Dec. 31, 9 p.m.

(202) 373-8183. mooNliGht circus DJ Bikram performs at this lively year-end celebration featuring stilt-walkers, jugglers, and magicians. Guests will dance the night away while snacking on passed hors d’oeuvres and enjoying an open bar. Hyatt Regency Capitol Hill.

400 New Jersey Ave. NW. $99–$279. Dec. 31, 9 p.m. motowN soul revue New YeAr’s eve BAsh Enjoy a four-course dinner of Southern favorites at this soulful New Year’s eve celebration. DJ Heat spins Motown favorites and other R&B hits throughout the evening. Eatonville. 2121 14th St. NW. $39–$59. Dec. 31, 6:30 p.m. (202) 332-6432. mr. heNrY’s New YeAr’s evewith diAl 251 ANd vocAlist steve wAshiNGtoN Welcome 2016 with music from the local jazz group and a threecourse meal at the Capitol Hill mainstay. Mr. Henry’s.

601 Pennsylvania Ave. SE. $46–$66. Dec. 31, 6 p.m.

(202) 546-8412.

No, I have not seen Quentin Tarantino’s latest film, so I apologize if it ends up sucking (though, when has a Tarantino film sucked?), but here’s why you need to see it: Tarantino, a true cinephile, arranged for about 100 theaters around the world to be retrofitted with anamorphic 70mm film projectors to screen a special “roadshow” edition of the film. One of those theaters, the AFI Silver in Silver Spring, is one of the last theaters in the area that still projects movies on film and is perhaps the perfect venue to take in Tarantino’s latest.

In addition to the retrofitted 70mm projectors, the “roadshow” edition harkens back to movie-going of yesteryear; running over three hours with an intermission and overture and without 30 minutes of previews and advertisements before the show. A trip to the movies is a classic Christmas tradition for those who don’t celebrate (or for those that do, but need a break from family time), and nothing screams “the holiday season” more than a bloody Quentin Tarantino film about stranded bounty hunters presented on gorgeous 70mm. ‘Tis the season. The film shows daily at AFI Silver Theatre, 8633 Colesville Road, —Matt Cohen Silver Spring. $20. (301) 495-6700. afi.com/silver.

FREE SHOT!

with Keenan & Smudge

New YeAr’s eve BoNd BAll Don your finest tux, check out a secret agent photo booth, and enjoy martinis (shaken, not stirred, of course) at this James Bond-themed New Year’s Eve celebration. Westin Arlington Gateway. 801 North Glebe Road, Arlington. $119–$199. Dec. 31, 8 p.m. (703) 717-6200.

European cities, like a romantic Paris area, a DJ area inspired by Ibiza and Barcelona’s hottest clubs, and a London spot featuring hypnotist shows. Guests will enjoy a full buffet meal, an open bar, and a midnight balloon drop. Capital Hilton Hotel. 1001 16th St. NW. $99–$149. Dec. 31, 9 p.m. (202) 393-1000.

New YeAr’s eve mAsquerAde BAll Don your finest mask and head to the Howard Theatre to ring in the new year in secret and style. Along with music, the evening includes a professional burlesque performance. Howard Theatre. 620 T St. NW. $45–$80. Dec. 31, 10 p.m. (202) 803-2899.

the returN of GAtsBY GAlA Enjoy a dinner buffet at this swanky restaurant on the Potomac that will be decorated to look like a fancy party from the ‘20s. All tickets include access to an open bar, party favors, and a midnight toast. Sequoia. 3000 K St. NW. $155–$185. Dec. 31, 9 p.m. (202) 944-4200.

3-7pm every

Sun. Nov-Feb

Come for brunch, stay for the party!

New YeAr’s eve mAsquerAde BAll Masks are required for admittance at this swank party at the W’s POV Lounge. Once you’re inside, enjoy music from popular DJs and a midnight toast. W Hotel.

515 15th St. NW. $90. Dec. 31, 8 p.m.

(202) 661-2400.

2047 9th Street NW located next door to 9:30 club

SearCh LISTIngS aT waShIngTonCITYpaper.Com

CITY LIGHTS: FRIDAY

Ne YeAr’s eve Blowout Seven DJs will perform on both floors of the club during this New Year’s Eve gathering. Tickets include access to an open bar and a selection of snacks. Rock & Roll Hotel. 1353 H St. NE. $80–$100. Dec. 31, 8 p.m. (202) 388-ROCK.

SUNDAY FUNDAY

New Year’s Eve . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .25 Music . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .25 Galleries . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .28 Dance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .30 Theater . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3 0 Film . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .33

NiGht At the Newseum Explore one of the city’s most popular museums at this party featuring snacks from Wolfgang Puck Catering, an open bar, Champagne toasts, and great views of D.C. Newseum. 555 Pennsylvania Ave. NW. $175–$255.

Dec. 31, 9 p.m. (888) 639-7386.

PAssPort to the world GAlA Different sections of this party are made up to resemble different

stK d.c. NYe cocKtAil PArtY EQ Mafia and DJ K-Meta perform at his celebration that includes an open bar during its first hour and bottle service for VIPs. STK DC. 1250 Connecticut Ave. NW. $95–$135.

Dec. 31, 10 p.m. (202) 296-1880. white & Gold NYe PArtY DJ Donald Syriani performs at this fancy party put on by Moët & Chandon that features a midnight toast and balloon drop.

Guests can choose from a seated meal of sea bass, lamb chops, and filet mignon or opt for a cocktail reception ticket that includes an open bar and passed appetizers. Fig & Olive. 934 Palmer Alley NW. $100–$150. Dec. 31, 8 p.m. (202) 559-5004.

willY woNKA’s NYe chocolAte fActorY Enjoy an open bar and enter to win tickets to every DC9 show in 2016 at this celebration featuring three floors of music. DC9. 1940 9th St. NW. $65. Dec. 31, 10 p.m. (202) 483-5000.

Music

FridaY Jazz

KeNNedY ceNter milleNNium stAGe 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. 17th All-Star Christmas Day Jazz Jam. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

DJ Nights BlAcK cAt 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490.

Rager in the Manger with DJ Keller. 8 p.m. Free. blackcatdc.com. dc9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Discnotheque with DJ Bill Spieler. 10:30 p.m. Free. dcnine.com.

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 25

saturdaY Rock

Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Southside Johnny & The Asbury Jukes. 7:30 p.m. $39.50. birchmere.com.

1811 14 ST NW TH

www.blackcatdc.com

DECEMBER

@blackcatdc

DEC / JAN SHOWS FRI 25

RAGER IN THE MANGER: METAL & FREE

SAT 26

SAT 26

PINBALL

W 23 SECRET SOCIETY S 26

FILM SCREENING:

SALAD DAYS GAY//BASH!!

SU 27 A GOSPEL

ACCORDING TO JAZZ W/ KIRK WHALUM

DRAG NIGHT/DANCE PARTY

RUSE DE GUERRE MON 28 LORELEI GOVERNESS SUN 27

TUE 29

THE QUEERS BIGWIG

WED 30 INDUSTRY THU 31

NYE PARTY

NYE BALL

M 28 DARYL DAVIS PRESENTS:

AN EVENING WITH SANDRA DEAN

T 29

PEACHES O’DELL & HER ORCHESTRA

TONY ANTHONY & HIS MALVIVANTS DJ DREDD / $30 COVER

FRI 01 SAT 02

NEW YEAR’S BURLESQUE (21+)

DOC’S NIGHT

TRIBUTE & BENEFIT FEAT. SCREAM & OTHER GUESTS

THU DEC 31

F1

THE NIGHTHAWKS JAMISON & DOUBLE O SOUL

S2

SHADOWS OF THE 60’S - FOUR TOPS TRIBUTE + PINK PAHLISH BIG SOMETHING W/ DALE & THE ZDUBS

TAKE METRO!

7719 Wisconsin Ave., Bethesda, MD (240) 330-4500

TO BUY TICKETS VISIT TICKETFLY.COM

Two Blocks from Bethesda Metro/Red Line Free Parking on Weekends

WE ARE LOCATED 3 BLOCKS FROM THE U STREET/CARDOZO STATION

the hAmiltoN 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Rebirth Brass Band. 8:30 p.m. $37–$42. thehamiltondc.com.

ElEctRoNic u street music hAll 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. Moon Boots, Jacques Renault, Mr Bonkerz.

10 p.m. $15. ustreetmusichall.com.

go-go howArd theAtre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

Trouble Funk, Black Alley, Raheem DeVaughn.

10 p.m. $30. thehowardtheatre.com.

rocK & roll hotel 1353 H St. NE. (202) 388ROCK. DJ Basscamp. 10 p.m. Free. rockandrollhoteldc.com.

gospEl KeNNedY ceNter milleNNium stAGe 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Family of Praise. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

suNdaY Rock

9:30 cluB 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. Clutch, Crobot, Valkyrie. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) 930.com.

BlAcK cAt BAcKstAGe 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Ruse de Guerre, Dropping Ugly, Tarfu.

7:30 p.m. $10–$12. blackcatdc.com.

FuNk & R&B

DJ Nights

BossA Bistro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Three Man Soul Machine. 9:30 p.m. Free. bossadc.com.

9:30 cluB 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. #YASQUEEN: Homo for the holidays w/ Dj Deedub & DJ Mim. 9 p.m. $15. 930.com.

the hAmiltoN 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Rebirth Brass Band. 8:30 p.m. $37–$42. thehamiltondc.com.

NEW YEAR’S EVE DOC SCANTLIN & HIS IMPERIAL PALMS ORCHESTRA

SU 3

TUE JAN 19 JUKEBOX THE GHOST

THE JAM W/ GARY GRAINGER & FRIENDS

FuNk & R&B

dc9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Body Werk.

10:30 p.m. $2–$5. dcnine.com.

THURSDAY DECEMBER 31

BLACK CAT

NYE BALL

DEANNA BOGART + BOBBY THOMPSON PROJECT

GYPsY sAllY’s 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

Katita and the Fajitas, Projected Man, West Main.

8:30 p.m. $10. gypsysallys.com.

BlAcK cAt BAcKstAGe 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Gay/Bash with DJ Dean Sullivan. 10 p.m. $10. blackcatdc.com.

26 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

CITY LIGHTS: SATURDAY

REBIRTH BRASS BAND Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans? Short of a trip to the Crescent City, there’s no better way to find out than dancing along with the Rebirth Brass Band. There is no musical group currently performing that better represents the city. While plenty of acts are steeped in the roots of jazz and blues, few are able to combine it with modern funk and hip-hop in ways that feel fresh and energizing. Rebirth’s latest album, Move Your Body, is as good an example of the power of a good brass band as any. Its songs are welcoming and invigorating like the Big Easy itself. The band builds on bass lines that give you permission to let loose and leave your baggage at the door as you dream of moss-covered branches and tall sugar pines. The Hamilton is clearing out a dance floor for Rebirth’s two-night stand after Christmas so bring your best shoes and prepare to leave your heart in a city 1,000 miles away. Rebirth Brass Band performs with The Funk Ark at 8:30 p.m. at The Hamilton, —Justin Weber 600 14th St. NW. $37–$42. (202) 787-1000. thehamiltondc.com.

CITY LIGHTS: SUNDAY

SKRILLEX The best beef in the history of beefs is the beef between Deadmau5 and Skrillex. “Where Are Ü Now,” the implausibly good earworm by Justin Bieber, blew it wide open. Deadmau5 said Bieber didn’t have anything to do with the song, giving all credit to Skrillex and co-producer Diplo. That might sound like a compliment, but Deadmau5 was damning them with faint praise for being so foolish as to let Biebs into the cool-kid computer club.

Skrillex shot back, calling Deadmau5 an “arsehole.” The particulars of this beef aren’t as good as the idea of two grown men who dress as characters from a Neal Stephenson novel coming together for a hypothetical resolution—a meeting that absolutely must take the form of a DJ battle, one so over the top that it would have to animated. Picture two of popular music’s favorite EDM and house DJs, charging up Super Saiyan–style as they drop skull-crushing beats on each other’s faces in a bombastic effort to upstage the other. One day the world may get that anime; in the real world, though, Deadmau5 appears to have dropped it, deleting his accounts from Twitter and Facebook. D.C. will have to settle for two nights of Skrillex at Echostage and the Beliebers who are sure to follow him there.Skrillex performs at 9 p.m. at Echostage, 2135 Queens Chapel Road NE. $50. (202) —Kriston Capps 503-2330. echostage.com.

ElEctRoNic

FuNk & R&B

u street music hAll 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. Holy Slizzatrism Holiday Party with Dougie F, Ras Nebyu, and others. 9 p.m. $7. ustreetmusichall.com.

Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Mint Condition. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) birchmere.com.

BluEs mAdAm’s orGAN 2461 18th St. NW. (202) 6675370. Stacy Brooks. 9 p.m. $3–$7. madamsorgan.com.

couNtRy Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. 19th Annual Hank Williams Tribute.

7:30 p.m. $29.50. birchmere.com.

MoNdaY Rock

BlAcK cAt BAcKstAGe 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. Lorelei, Governess, DJs Geoff Turner, Dan Searing, and Archie Moore. 7:30 p.m. $12. blackcatdc.com. the hAmiltoN 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Live At The Fillmore: The Definitive Tribute to The Original Allman Brothers Band. 7:30 p.m. $15–$23. thehamiltondc.com.

ElEctRoNic fillmore silver sPriNG 8656 Colesville Road, Silver Spring. (301) 960-9999. The White Panda. 9 p.m. $25. fillmoresilverspring.com.

tuesdaY Rock

BlAcK cAt BAcKstAGe 1811 14th St. NW. (202) 667-4490. The Queers, Bigwig, Walk the Plank.

7:30 p.m. $15. blackcatdc.com. the hAmiltoN 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Start Making Sense, HmfO. 7:30 p.m. $18–$23. thehamiltondc.com.

FuNk & R&B Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Mint Condition. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) birchmere.com.

WoRlD KeNNedY ceNter milleNNium stAGe 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Holocaust Survivor Klezmer Band. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 27

hip-hop howArd theAtre 620 T St. NW. (202) 803-2899.

DMV Bounce and Hip Hop Awards Show. 7 p.m. $25. thehowardtheatre.com.

DJ Nights NEED A LAST MINUTE GIFT?

u street music hAll 1115 U St. NW. (202) 5881880. So Far Gone Drake Night. 10 p.m. $5. ustreetmusichall.com.

wedNesdaY Rock

WE’RE

9:30 cluB 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. St. Paul and the Broken Bones, Seratones. 7 p.m. $35.

930.com.

HERE FOR

BossA Bistro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Burt the Dirt. 9:30 p.m. Free. bossadc.com.

GYPsY sAllY’s 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

Pimps of Joytime, Aztec Sun. 8:30 p.m. $20–$25. gypsysallys.com.

YOU. Open on Christmas Eve 7:30am-5ish!

FuNk & R&B Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. Mint Condition. 7:30 p.m. (Sold out) birchmere.com.

couNtRy mAdAm’s orGAN 2461 18th St. NW. (202) 6675370. The Human Country Jukebox Band. 9 p.m.

Free. madamsorgan.com.

19th Street NW

NW ve tA icu ect nn Co

Q Street NW

Ma ssa chu set ts A ve NW 20th Street NW

P Street NW

thursdaY Rock

9:30 cluB 815 V St. NW. (202) 265-0930. St. Paul and the Broken Bones, Trouble Funk. 9 p.m. (Sold out) 930.com.

GYPsY sAllY’s 3401 K St. NW. (202) 333-7700.

Pimps of Joytime, The Ron Holloway Band. 9 p.m. $30–$38. gypsysallys.com.

Dupont Circle

old eBBitt Grill 675 15th St. NW. (202) 347-4800.

John Kadlecik Band. 10 p.m. $30–$44.25. ebbitt.com.

FuNk & R&B the hAmiltoN 600 14th St. NW. (202) 787-1000.

Charles Bradley and his Extraordinaires, Dirty Bourbon River Show. 9 p.m. $80–$95. thehamiltondc.com.

KeNNedY ceNter milleNNium stAGe 2700 F St. NW. (202) 467-4600. Sir Joe Quarterman and FreeSoul. 6 p.m. Free. kennedy-center.org.

ElEctRoNic u street music hAll 1115 U St. NW. (202) 588-1880. Not Just Another New Year’s Eve with Nadastrom, Tittsworth, and Ken Lazee. 10 p.m. $15. ustreetmusichall.com.

couNtRy Birchmere 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria.

(703) 549-7500. The Seldom Scene, Gold Heart, Only Lonesome. 8 p.m. $39.50. birchmere.com.

WoRlD BossA Bistro 2463 18th St NW. 202-667-0088.

Cissa Paz. 10 p.m. $10. bossadc.com.

DJ Nights 1517 CONNECTICUT AVE. NW 202.387.1400 // KRAMERS.COM

dc9 1940 9th St. NW. (202) 483-5000. Willy Wonka’s NYE Chocolate Factory. 10 p.m. $65. dcnine.com.

28 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

rocK & roll hotel 1353 H St. NE. (202) 388ROCK. Ne Year’s Eve Blowout. 8 p.m. $80–$100. rockandrollhoteldc.com.

Galleries

the AtheNAeum 201 Prince St., Alexandria. (703) 548-0035. nvfaa.org. OngOing: “Notes on the State of Virginia.” Artist Suzanne Stryk presents a series of assemblages inspired by Thomas Jefferson’s book and her subsequent travels around the state.

Dec. 17–Jan. 31. cross mAcKeNzie GAllerY 2026 R St. NW. (202) 333-7970. crossmackenzie.com. ClOsing: “Nicole Gunning.” Large-scale figurative sculptures from the D.C.-based ceramic artist. Dec. 2–Dec. 27. flAshPoiNt GAllerY 916 G St. NW. (202) 3151305. culturaldc.org. OngOing: “Human Hierarchies.” In a new installation that comments on leadership and homogeneity, Maggie Evans presents detailed drawings of hundreds of chairs that are then recreated in plastic. Dec. 5–Jan. 9.

GreAter restoN Arts ceNter 12001 Market St., Ste. 103, Reston. (703) 471-9242. restonarts.org.

OngOing: “Continuum.” Abstract sculptures and paintings inspired by the work of scientists by artist Rebecca Kamen. Dec. 1–Feb. 13. hoNfleur GAllerY 1241 Good Hope Road SE. (202) 365-8392. honfleurgallery.com. OngOing: “Icons: Las Virgincitas.” In this series of twelve paint-

ings, Dariana Arias depicts women from around the world as the Virgin Mary. Nov. 13–Jan. 8. moNtPelier Arts ceNter 9652 Muirkirk Road, Laurel. (301) 377-7800. arts.pgparks.com. ClOsing: “Sushama Parikh.” Studies of horses and bulls, ceramic tiles, and plates by Indian-born artist Sushama Parikh. Nov. 7–Dec. 27. ClOsing: “Menagerie.” Paintings of animals by artist Caroline Thorington. Nov. 7–Dec. 27. ClOsing: “All Hung Open Exhibition: Gratitude.” Participants are invited to post individual pieces based around the theme of gratitude in this collaborative community exhibition.

Nov. 7–Dec. 27. ClOsing: “Annual Holiday Group Show.” New works by Montpelier’s resident artists are featured in this year-end show. Dec. 5–Dec. 27. mortoN fiNe Art 1781 Florida Ave. NW. (202) 628-2787. mortonfineart.com. OngOing: “Maya Freelon Asante.” New, textural paintings by the acclaimed artist. Dec. 12–Jan. 5. vivid solutioNs GAllerY 1231 Good Hope Road SE. (202) 365-8392. vividsolutionsdc.com. OngOing: “Pink, Part 1.” A new and colorful multimedia installation by local visual artist Carolina Mayorga.

Nov. 13–Jan. 8. wAshiNGtoN PriNtmAKers GAllerY 1641 Wisconsin Ave. NW. (202) 669-1497. washingtonprintmakers.com. ClOsing: “Matina Marki Tillman.”

Hand-pulled prints by the Greek-born artist.

Dec. 1–Dec. 27.

CITY LIGHTS: MONDAY

LORELEI

It’s a music tale as old as time: Band starts, makes a great album that’s unappreciated in its day, band breaks up, album becomes regarded as classic and influential, band reunites to play said album. On Monday at Black Cat, indie-pop trio Lorelei will do just that, playing in its entirety their 1996 debut album, Everyone Must Touch The Stove, to mark its 20th anniversary. As the Clicky Clicky Music blog wrote, “Everyone Must Touch The Stove foretold much of the coming post-rock movement, whose influence helped shape the next two decades of sub-popular independent music.” Indeed, the low-key, jangly post-rock sound of Everyone Must Touch The Stove is much ahead of its time, which—intentionally or not—influenced the next generation of indie bands whose tempered, lo-fi songs would dominate the underground music scene in the early-to-mid aughts. The three members of Lorelei are scene veterans now, with lives and careers that stretch beyond their musical interests, so Monday’s show probably won’t be replicated or taken out on the road. Lorelei performs with Governess and DJs Geoff Turner, Dan Searing, and Archie Moore at 7:30 p.m. at the Black Cat Backstage, 1811 14th St. —Matt Cohen NW. $12. (202) 667-4490. blackcatdc.com.

----------

TOP PRICES PAID

3701 Mount Vernon Ave. Alexandria, VA • 703-549-7500

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For entire schedule go to Birchmere.com Find us on Facebook/Twitter!

Tix @ Ticketmaster.com 800-745-3000

26

SUN DECEMBER 27TH

A DRAG SALUTE TO THE DIVAS THU DECEMBER 31ST

NEW YEAR'S EVE 2016: MASQUERADE BALL

Find out what ToDo Today online.

SAT JANUARY 9TH

THE EARTH, WIND & FIRE TRIBUTE SHOW

CELEBRATING 40 + YEARS OF EWF

FRI JANUARY 15TH

THANKFUL FOR AMY:

AMY WINEHOUSE TRIBUTE FT. ELISE TESTONE

SAT JANUARY 16TH MAX MAJOR’S THINK AGAIN

AN EVENING OF MIND READING & MAGIC

Wednesday, December 23

COMIC BOOK COLORS & THE NEXT STEP

two Grateful bands spreading holiday merriment!

Saturday, December 26

HOT TUB HAND GRENADE {Rock n’ roll covers and originals}

Wednesday, December 30

OPEN MIC NIGHT

{open to all muscicians!} Thursday, December 31

NEW YEARS EVE at Villain and Saint w/ ON THE BUS & TEN FEET TALL!!!

Friday, January 1

FIVES rock n’ roll hangover party!!!

Saturday, January 2

MONTGOMERY WARLOCKS Grateful Dead Tribute Band

Tuesday, January 5

1ST TUESDAYS SINGER/SONG OPEN JAM Grateful Dead Tribute Band

Wednesday, January 6

OPEN MIC NIGHT Open to all Musicians!

Thursday, January 7

BAD INFLUENCE

{Blues Rock and Americana}

SUN JANUARY 17TH

RARE ESSENCE WITH JUNKYARD BAND & EU

WED JANUARY 20TH

SWV

WITH SPECIAL GUESTS TTYL

THU JANUARY 21ST

VIPER ROCKS THE TOP GUN

SOUNDTRACK, LIVE!

SAT JANUARY 23RD

MAJAH HYPE THU JANUARY 28TH

SLICK RICK WITH LIVE BAND

FRI JANUARY 29TH STRATOSPHERE ALL-STARS

WITH MEMBERS OF BIG GIGANTIC, STS9, PARTICLE, AND DIGITAL TAPE MACHINE

SAT JANUARY 30TH

ELLE VARNER W W W. V I L L A I N A N D S A I N T. C O M

SOUTHSIDE JOHNNY

Dec

BUY TICKETS AT THE BOX OFFICE OR ONLINE AT THEHOWARDTHEATRE.COM 202-803-2899

& THE ASBURY JUKES

27

19th Annual

HANK WILLIAMS TRIBUTE

featuring Robin & Linda Williams, Robbie Fulks, Cathy Fink &

Marcy Marxer, Rickie Simpkins, Dave Chappell, Mark Schatz 31 New Year’s Eve with

THE SELDOM SCENE Gold Heart & Only Lonesome – 8 pm MO’FIRE

Jan 1 featuring In Gratitude: A Tribute to Earth, Wind & Fire and Motown & More: A Tribute to Motown & Soul Legends 2

Honky Tonk Holiday Hangover Show!

BILL KIRCHEN & TOO MUCH FUN WITH COMMANDER CODY KENTUCKY 8&9 RICKY SKAGGS & THUNDER 10 MACEO PARKER 14

PERFORMING DAVID BOWIE’S THE MAN WHO SOLD THE WORLD 15&17

25th Anniversary Shows!

All eddie from ohio Request!

21 MORRIS DAY & THE TIME

MARSHALL CRENSHAW & THE BOTTLE ROCKETS

22

23

As seen on EMILY WEST“America’s Got Talent!”

Rock of Ages Music

24

“ROAM Through Time!”

27

An Evening with

RAUL MALO 28 KELLYWILLIS&RADIORANCH Celebrate 25th Anniversary of “Well Traveled Love” 29 &30

WILL DOWNING

31

DAVID CASSIDY

Feb 2

DWEEZIL ZAPPA Via Zammata’ Tour

w/Curtis JAMES McMURTRY McMurtry 4 The STANLEY CLARKE BAND 5&6 ARLO GUTHRIE 50th Anniversary of Alice’s Restaurant 8&9 TOMMY EMMANUEL

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Sun. Feb. 21, 2016, 8pm DAR Constitution Hall, Wash DC

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washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 29

daNce

A NYE Ball featuring an arts & music showcase

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French / Moroccan / Moulin Rouge theme with bands in our cabaret & DJ sets on the top 2 club levels.

mArYlANd Youth BAllet’s “the NutcrAcKer” Students from Maryland Youth Ballet bring this classic tale of enchanted food and toys to life in this annual production. Robert E. Parilla Performing Arts Center. 51 Mannakee St., Rockville. December 25; December 26; December 27. $5. (240) 567-5301. montgomerycollege.edu/pac. wAshiNGtoN BAllet’s NutcrAcKer The local ballet company brings its historical interpretation of this holiday favorite, set in Georgetown and featuring cameo appearances by local VIPs, back to the Warner Theatre for a month of shows. Warner Theatre. 513 13th St. NW. December 25; December 26; December 27. $30–$120. (202) 783-4000. warnertheatre.com.

theater

AKeelAh ANd the Bee A young girl growing up in Chicago challenges herself to succeed and winds up competing in the Scripps National Spelling Bee, but will she be prepared enough to beat competitors from around the country? Charles Randolph-Wright directs the world premiere of this play adapted from the popular film of the same name. Arena Stage.

1101 6th St. SW. To December 27. $55–$90. (202) 488-3300. arenastage.org.

BAd Jews Three cousins—one secular, one nonsecular, and one somewhere in the middle—fight over a family heirloom following the death of their grandfather in this comedy that blends family and faith. After an acclaimed run last winter, Studio brings this spirited production back for another round. Studio Theatre. 1501 14th St. NW. To January 3. $20–$81. (202) 332-3300. studiotheatre.org.

BlAcK NAtivitY Theatre Alliance again presents their production of this Langston Hughes play that retells the Christmas story from an African-American perspective and features a lively gospel soundtrack.

Anacostia Playhouse. 2020 Shannon Place SE. To January 3. $10–$35. (202) 544-0703. anacostiaplayhouse.com.

BriGht stAr Steve Martin and Edie Brickell collaborate on this new musical, a love story set in the American South in the 1920s and 1940s about the powerful relationship between an editor and a recently returned soldier. Kennedy Center Eisenhower Theater. 2700 F St. NW. To January 10. $45–$175. (202) 467-4600. kennedy-center.org.

A BroAdwAY christmAs cArol This seasonal favorite, which sets Dickens’ tale of holiday reflection to the tune of favorite showtunes, returns to MetroStage for a fifth go-round. MetroStage. 1201 N. Royal St., Alexandria. To December 27. $50. (703) 548-9044. metrostage.org.

A christmAs cArol For more than 30 years, Ford’s Theatre has welcomed the holiday season with a production of Dickens’ tale of cheer and forgiveness. Local actor Edward Gero returns to play everyone’s favorite miser, Ebenezer Scrooge. Ford’s Theatre. 511 10th St. NW. To December 31. $44–$91.

(202) 347-4833. fordstheatre.org.

GuYs ANd dolls Gamblers, evangelists, musicians, and dancers come together in this classic musical based on stories by Damon Runyon. Among this production’s memorable songs are “Luck Be a Lady,” “I’ll Know,” and “A Bushel and a Peck.”

Olney Theatre Center. 2001 Olney-Sandy Spring Road, Olney. To December 27. $30–$75. (301) 9243400. olneytheatre.org.

AN irish cArol The Keegan gang revives its popular Irish adaptation of Dickens’ holiday tale, featuring a pub owner called David instead of a banker called Scrooge. Keegan Theatre at Church Street Theater. 1742 Church St. NW. To December 31. $20–$40. (703) 892-0202. keegantheatre.com.

Kiss me, KAte Cole Porter looks to Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew for inspiration in this joyful musical about a leading man who winds up

George V Johnson 65th Bday Celebration & Concert ly ear w Sun Dec 20th o sh

Noble Jolley

DC’s Legendary Jazz Club

Established in 1926 2001 11th ST NW - (202)299-0800

Donvonte Fri & Sat McCoy

Christmas Special one w/ Strings w sho Sun Dec 20th

Christie Dashiell

The Hang

Dec 4th & 5th

hosted by

The Young Lions

CITY LIGHTS: TUESDAY

Robert Glasper DJs Munch & Stutz McGee

START MAKING SENSE

Sun Dec 20th doors @ 9pm

Fri & Sat Dec 11th & 12th

Ben Williams

David Ornette Sun Dec 13 Cherry

& Sound Effect

th

3rd Annual Bday Concert

Kenneth Sat & Sun Dec 26 & 27 Whalum New Years Eve 2015 Fri & Sat III Carolyn Dec 18 & 19 th

th

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Malachi Two Show Times

Bohemian Caverns Jazz Orchestra Reginald Cyntje Mondays @ 8pm "This group is something special." ~ Mike West (CityPaper)

Fri & Sat Jan 8th & 9th

www.BohemianCaverns.com

30 december 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

Are Talking Heads tribute acts really necessary these days? In the age of Netflix, surround sound, and home projectors, fans of the seminal new wave band can instantly cue up Stop Making Sense, Jonathan Demme’s 1984 concert film, and connect with David Byrne from the comfort of their own homes. Hell, you don’t even need to wear pants, let alone an enormous suit! That being said, if you consider Talking Heads shows to be examples of performance art, then a mid-week gig by the New York-based cover band Start Making Sense is a logical continuation of that performance. Featuring eight musicians whose experience ranges from jazz to punk to psychedelia, the group travels from coast to coast performing spot-on versions of “Nothing But Flowers” and “Burning Down the House” without resorting to mimicry. Even Talking Heads keyboardist Bernie Worrell espoused his support for the group. Go ahead and dance like Reagan is still in power. Arrive early and wearing a mustache (real or fake) to clap along with Hall and Oates cover band HmfO. Start Making Sense performs with HmfO at 7:30 p.m. at The Hamilton, 600 14th St. NW. $18–$23. (202) 787-1000. thehamiltondc.com.

—Caroline Jones

D.C.’s awesomest events calendar. washingtoncitypaper.com/ calendar

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TRIVIA EVERY M O N D AY & W E D N E S D AY

$3 PBR & NATTY BOH ALL DAY EVERY DAY

600 beers from around the world

Downstairs: good food, great beer: $3 PBR & Natty Boh’s all day every day

ROCK ‘N’ TWANG NYE PARTY

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UPCOMING PERFORMANCES

REBIRTH BRASS BAND SAT/SUN

DEC 26/27

New Year’s Eve

CHARLES BRADLEY & HIS EXTRAORDINAIRES

W/ THE DIRTY BOURBON RIVER SHOW

THURSDAY DEC

31

MON, DEC 28

LIVE AT THE FILLMORE

THE DEFINITIVE TRIBUTE TO THE ORIGINAL ALLMAN BROTHERS BAND TUES, DEC 29

START MAKING SENSE

A TALKING HEADS TRIBUTE W/ HMFO: A HALL & OATES TRIBUTE SAT, JAN 2

ALL GOOD PRESENTS:

SCYTHIAN — SHAMROCK FEST PRE-PARTY W/ SECOND STRING BAND

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Dec 26

JOHNNY GRAVE & THE TOMBSTONES

Dec 29

STEALIN’ THE DEAL

Dec 31

ROCK ‘N’ TWANG NYE!

F R I D AY, D E C E M B E R 2 5 T H

CLOSED S A T U R D AY, D E C E M B E R 2 6 T H

H

H

Jan 2

JUMPIN’ JUPITER

Jan 5

COLONEL JOSH & THE HONKY TONK HEROES

Jan 7

PEEWEE MOORE

Jan 8

RANDY THOMPSON BAND

STARTS AT 730PM

Jan 14

AARON BURDETT

T U E S D AY, D E C E M B E R 2 9 T H

Jan 15

SCOTT KURT & MEMPHIS 59

Jan 16

THE WOODSHEDDERS

Feb 18

JASON EADY / MIKE & THE MOONPIES

Feb 19

DAN BAIRD & HOMEMADE SIN

Feb 25

GANSTAGRASS

Feb 26

ROGER CREAGER

Mar 5

WAYNE “THE TRAIN” HANCOCK

Mar 12

WILLIAM CLARK GREEN

S U N D AY, D E C E M B E R 2 7 T H

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12 DAYS OF SAVINGS

CITY LIGHTS: WEDNESDAY

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In 2011, despite receiving eight Grammy nominations in three years and reaching No. 1 on the Billboard Hot R&B chart, Jazmine Sullivan announced that she was taking a break from music, as she no longer considered it fun. (More recently, she said that an abusive relationship had also taken a toll on her.) This year, Sullivan is back with a new album, Reality Show, that she describes as a way to get on with her life. The record features lyrical character studies about what people will do for the person they love (the Bonnie and Clyde-like tale “#Hoodlove”), self-empowering anthems (“Masterpiece (Mona Lisa)”), and breakup odes (“Forever Don’t Last”) that offer straight-forward but never trite insights about romance and self-worth. Even if one doesn’t identify personally with the verbiage, it’s hard not to be impressed with Sullivan’s phrasing and musical presentation; her backing adeptly blends several decades of quiet storm soul and hip-hop influences. When she wails “He ain’t always right, but he’s just right for me” on “#Hoodlove,” she has the power and passion of Aretha Franklin. Jazmine Sullivan performs at 8 p.m. at The Fillmore, 8656 Colesville —Steve Kiviat Rd., Silver Spring. $32.50. (301) 960-9999. fillmoresilverspring.com. co-starring alongside his ex-wife and the fellow castmembers whose lives revolve around them. Among the popular songs from this musical are “Another Op’nin’, Another Show,” “Tom, Dick, or Harry,” and “Too Darn Hot.” Sidney Harman Hall. 610 F St. NW. To January 3. $20–$108. (202) 547-1122. shakespearetheatre.org. mAtildA the musicAl A young girl uses her powers of intelligence and mind control to work her way out of horrific circumstances in this lively musical inspired by the Roald Dahl novel. Kennedy Center Opera House. 2700 F St. NW. To January 10. $25–$175. 202-467-4600. kennedy-center.org. motowN: the musicAl The story of a small music label that changed the sound of America in the 1960s and 1970s is told in this lively and historical musical. National Theatre. 1321 Pennsylvania Ave. NW. To January 3. $48–$98. (202) 628-6161. nationaltheatre.org.

oliver! Arena’s artistic director Molly Smith directs this musical adaptation of Charles Dickens’ classic novel about an industrious orphan and the friends he meets in London. Classic songs from this show include “Consider Yourself,” “Where is Love?” and “Food, Glorious Food.” Arena Stage. 1101 6th St. SW. To January 3. $64–$99. (202) 488-3300. arenastage.org. sheAr mAdNess Enjoy the record-breaking comedy whodunit that lets the audience spot the clues, question the suspects and solve the funniest murder mystery in the annals of crime, now celebrating 25 years at the Kennedy Center. Kennedy Center Theater Lab. 2700 F St. NW. To December 31. $48.

202-467-4600. kennedy-center.org. stAGe Kiss Two actors with a romantic past play the leads in an emotional melodrama, and the line between their real lives and their characters blur in this play that considers what it means when two people touch their lips together. Aaron Posner

directs Sarah Ruhl’s charming comedy. Round House Theatre Bethesda. 4545 East-West Highway, Bethesda. To December 27. $36–$61. (240) 644-1100. roundhousetheatre.org.

Film

StarS of DaviD: Story to Song Inspired by the book by Abigail Pogrebin, this revue draws on interviews with famous Jews, from Gwyneth Paltrow and Ruth Bader Ginsburg to Aaron Sorkin and Gloria Steinem, to examine Jewish identity. Acclaimed composers including Jeanine Tesori, Marvin Hamlisch, and Sheldon Harnick provide the music. Theater J. 1529 16th St. NW. To December 27. $27–$52.

(202) 518-9400. theaterj.org.

their handler, Dave, might propose to his girlfriend,

too Much Light MakeS the BaBy go BLinD Just in time for the holidays, this Chicago-based theater group that promises to deliver 30 plays in 60 minutes returns to Woolly Mammoth for a spontaneous and interactive night of theater. Woolly Mammoth Theatre. 641 D St. NW. To January 3. $35–$68. (202) 393-3939. woollymammoth.net.

WeSt SiDe Story This tragic tale of warring gangs and devoted lovers comes to Signature for the first time. Featuring classic songs like “Tonight,” “America,” and “I Feel Pretty,” this production is directed

by Signature regular Matthew Gardiner. Signature Theatre. 4200 Campbell Ave., Arlington. To January 24. $40–$96. (703) 820-9771. signature-theatre.org.

aLvin anD the chipMunkS: the roaD chip The three rodents take off for Miami when they find out in this fourth film in the live-action film series. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information) in the heart of the Sea Chris Hemsworth stars as a sailor who encounters the whale that would inspire Melville’s Moby Dick in this searing production directed by Ron Howard. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information) SiSterS Left to pack up their parents’ house, two sisters decide to throw a final party in their childhood home. Antics ensue in this comedy starring Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information) Star WarS: the force aWakenS The battle between good and evil still rages in this Star Wars sequel set 30 years after The Return of the Jedi. The First Order and the Resistance fight to find Luke, the final Jedi, and return order to the galaxy. (See washingtoncitypaper.com for venue information)

Film clips are written by Caroline Jones

CITY LIGHTS: THURSDAY

ST. PAUL & THE BROKEN BONES

When selecting the music with which to ring in the new year, cover bands or DJs who remix “Auld Lang Syne” are fine if you want to dance. Should you want a group to successfully straddle the emotion of the past year ending with the excitement of a new one beginning, your best option is St. Paul & the Broken Bones, the Birmingham, Ala.-based soul group. Led by big-voiced vocalist Paul Janeway, the six-piece band channels old-school singers like Otis Redding and Wilson Pickett while turning out original tunes that could sound modern in 1965 or 2015. Their live performances look like feats of endurance, with Janeway sweating profusely, pacing, and occasionally climbing atop equipment, and the brass players blowing as if their lives depend on it, all while dressed in sharply tailored suits. For this special New Year’s Eve gig, the Bones are joined by another group that’s rooted in soul traditions: legendary go-go act Trouble Funk. Welcome 2016 with a bit of the old, a bit of the new, and plenty of sonic joy. St. Paul & the Broken Bones perform with Trouble Funk at 9 p.m. at the 9:30 Club, 815 V St. NW. $55. (202) 265-0930. 930.com.

—Caroline Jones

washingtoncitypaper.com december 25, 2015 33

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Classified Ads Print & Web Classified Packages may be placed on our Web site, by fax, mail, phone, or in person at our office: 1400 I (EYE) Street NW Suite 900 Washington, D.C. 20005.

The Inspired Teaching School requests proposals from providers who can conduct comprehensive evaluation services for current special education students or students who may need special education services.

The vendor will provide assessment services to students from preschool (age 3) through 7th grade. Additional information regarding the Inspired Teaching School and specifi cs of services requested are outlined in the Request for Proposals (RFP) and may be obtained by contacting kate.keplinger@inspiredteachingschool.org Proposals will be accepted until 5:00pm on January 6, 2016. Proposals should be submitted as a PDF or Microsoft Word document to Kate Keplinger, COO, at kate. keplinger @inspired te aching school.org with SPECIAL EDUCATION ASSESSMENT SERVICES RFP in the subject line.

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Commercial Ads rates start at $20 for up to 6 lines in print and online; additional print lines start at $2.50/line (vary by section).

Your print ad placement will include web placement plus up to 10 photos online.

Premium options available for both print and web may vary.

Legals

Houses for Rent

ELSIE WHITLOW STOKES PCS RFP: Project Management, Architectural, or General Contractor Services Interested parties may submit proposals to provide either project management, architectural, or general contractor svcs for a full HVAC and roof replacement.

Proposals are due no later than 12:00 PM on January 15, 2016.

For complete RFP, contact Erika Bryant at erikab@ewstokes.org.

Beautifully renovated and cozy 3BR/2BA HOUSE for RENT- 306 35th Street NE DC $ 2 2 0 0 / m o n t h + u t ili t i e s ... within a mile of Minnesota Ave and Stadium Armory Metro Stations...Serious inquiries please call 202-6174704.

Exit Bennett Realty

Houses for Rent Luxury Columbia Heights three-story rowhouse for rent, minutes from Reagan National Airport, culture, area restaurants and shops.

Fully equiped gourmet kitchen, gorgeous hardwood floors and plenty of natural light, two Jacuzzi bath tubs, four spacious bedroom suites with ample closet space, wood burning stoves and functional fireplaces in the den and master bedroom suites. This beautifully renovated home is affordably priced at unfurnished $5,600/mo or $6,000/mo partially furnished for the entire house.

Inquiries Mr. Simon Rennie at 202-997-5428 or 202-438-8607 email at sarennie@aol.com. www.youtube.com/watch?v=VBFke_ta0fY

Roommates ALL AREAS: ROOMMATES. COM. Lonely? Bored? Broke?

Find the perfect roommate to compliment your personality and lifestyles at Roommates.com!

Rooms for Rent Room avail. in a 2BR 1 BA condo in SE DC. Monthly rent $650, incl. utilities, w/d, dishwasher, cable & internet. St parking avail. Access to M6, V5, and W4 buses. Shared w/ prof female. Rm must be a non-smoker w/ no pets. Email Christina cmwilli80@gmail.com

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REAL PEOPLE REAL DESIRE REAL FUN

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For More Local Numbers: 1.800.926.6000 www.livelinks.com Teligence/18+

Print Deadline The deadline for submission and payment of classified ads for print is each Monday, 5 pm.

For more information please visit www.washingtoncitypaper.com

34 December 25, 2015 washingtoncitypaper.com

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Antiques & Collectibles

Room avail. in a 2BR 1 BA condo in SE DC. Monthly rent $650, incl. utilities, w/d, dishwasher, cable & internet. St parking avail. Access to M6, V5, and W4 buses. Shared w/ prof female. Rm must be a non-smoker w/ no pets. Email Christina cmwilli80@gmail.com

Comic Book & Sports Card Show SATURDAY JANUARY 2 10am3pm the Hall at the Annandale Virginia Fire House Expo Hall 7128 Columbia Pike 22003 will be full of dealers selling their collectibles such as: Gold, Silver, Bronze and Modern Age Comic Books, Nonsports Cards from the 1880’s to the present and Hobby Supplies for all your collecting needs PLUS Sports Cards- baseball, football, basketball & hockey - vintage to the present and sports collectibles & Toys & Vintage Records too.

Special Guest 10am-2pm Pitcher Denny McLain of Tigers and Senators fame -won 31 games in 1968 : also Artist Lenore” Sully” Sullivan “Vampirella” & “The Clock” fame and artists Laura Inglis & Dan Nokes. Something for Everyone. See you SATURDAY JANUARY 2 INFO: shoffpromotions.com show * One Dollar ($1) OFF normal $3 Admission with this Notice; 18 & under FREE

Capitol Hill Living: Furnished Rooms for rent for $1,100! Near Metro, major bus lines and Union Station - visit website for details www.TheCurryEstate.com

Business Opportunities PAID IN ADVANCE! Make $1000 A Week Mailing Brochures From Home! No Experience Required.

Helping home workers since 2001! Genuine Opportunity. Start Immediately! www.TheIncomeHub.com

General AIRLINE CAREERS begin here – Get started by training as FAA certifi ed Aviation Technician. Financial aid for qualifi ed students.

Job placement assistance. Call Aviation Institute of Maintenance 800-725-1563

Miscellaneous Update your skills for a better job! Continuing Education at Community College at UDC has more than a thousand certifi ed online & affordable classes in nearly every fi eld. Education on your own. http://cc.udc.edu/continuing_education

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City Paper Classifieds

ELECTRONICS DISH TV Starting at $19.99/month (for 12 mos.) SAVE! Regular Price $34.99 Ask About FREE SAME DAY Installation! CALL Now! 888992-1957

Miscellaneous

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Are you in BIG trouble with the IRS? Stop wage & bank levies, liens & audits, unfiled tax returns, payroll issues, & resolve tax debt FAST. Call 844-753-1317

CHATLINE TM

You may contact the Classifieds Rep by e-mailing classifieds@washingtoncitypaper.com or calling 202-650-6926.

Rooms for Rent

Aero-Pilates machine. Bought new $450, asking $295. NEVER used. Comes with two DVDs, Exercise chart and owners manual.

Low impact-easy on joints, folds for easy storage. (301) 503-1113 or mrl5757@aol.com.

This & That’s Flea Market, Every Friday & Sat 9am-4pm. Supra Sell Computers, cell phones, accessories and much more. Vendor space available call 202-3552068. Location 5615 Landover Road Cheverly, MD

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“Kids Story Book Two,”Ages 9-12. by Sidney Gelb. www.barnesandnoble.com, 1-800-8432665. Order today!

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Helping Hand Today 1 Sexual companion

Loosens up Not quite closed Praiseful poem Purple hue Offer, as a riddle Tea drinker’s carol?

19 Golden State Warriors coach Steve 20 Critter in a farm 21 Like uncomfortable silences 22 Arctic explorer http://www.washingtonShackleton citypaper.com/ 24 Act quickly 25 Easy-to-answer question 26 Super Bowl impossibility 28 Got ready to drive 29 Begins enthusiastically 32 Beezus, to Ramona 33 Cannibal’s carol?

36 “Hadn’t thought of that one” 37 Boring movie 38 Metropolitan areas, for short

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44 Put in the cloud Out with the old, 46 Coeur d’AleneIn with the new to-Helena dir.

Post your listing 47 How nightclubs with Washington lit CityarePaper Classifieds 49 Leave off the http://www.washingtnominations oncitypaper.com/ 50 Leafy vegetable high in Vitamin K 53 Words said before a reception 54 Manger animal

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Out with60the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City 5 Part of a drum kit Paper Classifieds

40 “Feliz Navidad that has a clutch / Prospero ___ http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ y felicidad” 6 The History Boys playwright 41 MMA fight Bennett locales 7 “Hold it!”

45 Mason’s tool 8 Bot. or bio.

47 Deeply religious 9 Exam that 48 “Hells yes” might get you 49 Telemark, e.g. college credit 51 Coin with 10 Composer of Mozart on it the NBA on 52 Thrill seeker’s NBC theme carol?

11 “In my 55 Google opinion ...” alternative to 12 Forwards, as Evernote an email 56 Becomes blunt 57 Barely make (out) 58 Fudges up big time LAST WEEK: CHRISTMAS ISLAND 59 Follows to P E E L E A V E D C C the letter C O L T H E A X M A N 60 Stereotypically S A L B A B Y D O L L M hard-to-shopfor member N E V E R G E A C E of the family T R A N S F O R M E R S W A P S L I T B I G W H E E L S K N I Down http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/ C L O T H A O V A 1 Pretty subdued M O N O P O L O Y V E Y 2 Follow closely E X A M M U D 3 Aches (for) J A C K I N T H E B O X 4 Cake Boss D A H L A B A T E E channel C H E C K E R I M O U T T O S A R O A B O D E V E T T A X L A T E X

Clinical Studies

Viagra!! 52 Pills for Only $99.00. Your #1 trusted provider for 10 years. Insured and Guaranteed Delivery. Call today 1-888403-9028

NEED A CAR, TRUCK of SUV? Over 1,000 vehicles in stock from 2011-2015!

Google Me: Jason Barrow Laurel Financing available for “ALL” credit situations!

202.704.8213 2006 Toyota RAV4 Limited $3200 Clean tile, Gas, Automatic, Gray interior/ Blue exterior color, 121K miles 6092502612

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RELAXING SOOTHING MASSAGE Reduce your stress, relax your mind, energize your body and restore your balance. Private offi ce in the Palisades. MacArthur Blvd., NW, DC. Outcalls welcome.

Appointment only.

240-463-7754 Valerie@ yourclassicmassage. com

Counseling

Cash For Cars We Buy Any Condition Vehicle, 2002 and Newer.

Nationwide Free Pick Up! Call Now: 1-888-420-3808 www. cash4car.com.

Pregnant? Thinking of Adoption? Talk with a caring agency specializing in matching Birthmothers with Families Nationwide. Living Expenses Paid. Call 24/7 Abby’s One True Gift Adoptions. 866-413-6293. Void in Illinois/New Mexico/Indiana.

DJ DC SOUL man. Hiphop, reggae, go-go, oldies, etc. Clubs, caberets, weddings, etc. Contact the DC Soul Hot Line at 202/2861773 or email me at dc1soulman@live.com.

ELIMINATE CELLULITE and Inches in weeks! All natural. Odor free. Works for men or women.

Free month supply on select packages. Order now! 844-2447149 (M-F 9am-8pm central)

COMIC BOOK & SPORTS CARD http://www.washingtSHOW oncitypaper.com/ SATURDAY JANUARY 2 10am3pm the Hall at the Annandale Virginia Fire House Expo Hall 7128 Columbia Pike 22003 will be full of dealers selling their collectibles such as: Gold, Silver, Bronze and Modern Age Comic Books, Nonsports Cards from the 1880’s to the present and Hobby Supplies for all your collecting needs PLUS Sports Cards- baseball, football, basketball & hockey - vintage to the present and sports collectibles & Toys & Vintage Records too.

Special Guest 10am-2pm Pitcher Denny McLain of Tigers and Senators fame -won 31 games in 1968 : also Artist Lenore” Sully” Sullivan “Vampirella” & “The Clock” fame and artists Laura Inglis & Dan Nokes.

INFO: shoffpromotions.com * One Dollar ($1) OFF normal $3 Admission with this Notice; 18 & under FREE

Health & Beauty Products

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Licensed Massage & Spas AAAH THE RUB! (301) 7923950. 60MIN/$85-90MIN/$105.

Tranquil home-based Day Spa (near Glenmont Metro) By appointment only 7-days-a-week 12pm-5pm. http://time2refresh. com Excellent Massage by beautiful therapists in Qi Spa. Swedish, Deep Tissue, Hot Stone massage. 3106 M Street, NW, Washington, DC 20007. www.qispadc.com. Ask for cash discount! Appointment or walk-ins welcome. 202-333-6344.

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Heaven-On-Earth.

You’ve tried the rest, now come to the best! 240-418-9530, Bethesda.

MD Massage License #R00120.

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A T A D

November Calendar of Events at SAMSARA HOUSE 2023 in Bloomingdale, Highlighted by “HEALING HEARTS AT WOUNDED KNEE, How to End Violence, Racism and Genocide by Healing Humanity’s Collective Trauma at its Roots.” View Calendar, Show Up http://bit.ly/ NOV2015EVENTS

Volunteer Services Defend abortion rights. Washington Area Clinic Defense Task Force (WACDTF) needs volunteer clinic escorts Saturday mornings, weekdays. Trainings, other info:202-681-6577, http://www. wacdtf.org, info@wacdtf.org.

Twitter: @wacdtf

Out with the old, In with the new Post your listing with Washington City Paper Classifieds http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/

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washingtoncitypaper.com December 25, 2015 35

TickeTs on sale now!

Save the Date!

Crafty Bastards Cabin Fever Indoor Show! New Location! One Day Only!

E TN HS 16T

W NE

E EN AV RK O Y

10 a.m. - 7 p.m.

New LocatioN:

E TN IE S OK

Hecht Warehouse

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NE ST

VI RG IN IA

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CK WI FEN

E TN IE S OK

Saturday, Feb. 6, 2016

1401 New York Ave. NE Washington, DC www.washingtoncitypaper.com/craftybastards