Latest issue: Mardi Gras Manual – February 2021

February 2021 February 202 1

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CONTENTS February 2021

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12 14

Throws of Passion—The History of the Mardi Gras Loot We Love The Meaning of Mardi Gras

Showing Your Krewe Colors— The History of Purple, Green, and Gold

18 22

Love in the Time of Covid

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Cancelling Carnival: The Times Mardi Gras was Called Off

Cross Purposes: Ways Across the Mississippi River

36 38

Creative Director: Robert Witkowski

Baking With Love: Valentine Cookies $20 & Under Restaurant Guide

44 45

Movie Editors: David Vicari, Fritz Esker Contributing Writers: Kathy Bradshaw, Phil LaMancusa, Debbie Lindsey, Kim Ranjbar, Burke Bischoff, Julie Mitchell, Greg Roques, Eliana Blum, Leigh Wright, Steve Melendez, Michelle Nicholson, Sabrina Stone, Kimmie Tubre, Emily Hingle Cover Photo: Female Impersonator; Mardi Gras 1919, courtesy of The Historic New Orleans Collection, Gift of Waldemar S. Nelson, 2003.0182.159

Extras

Executive Editor: Kathy Bradshaw

Tales From the Quarter Po-Boy Views

Director of Sales: Stephen Romero Photographers and Designers: Gus Escanelle, Kimmie Tubre, Emily Hingle, Robert Witkowski, Kathy Bradshaw, Genni Nicholson

Running Races During Covid Back on Track: Benefits of Chiropractic Care

Interns: Laurel Shimasaski, Lucia Hughes, Kala Hathorn, Adrienne Snider, Genni Nicholson, Kelie Arevalo, Akadya Thompson.

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Letter from the Publisher Happy Carnival! While now would normally be a time of preparing for parades, attending balls with your krewe, and practicing those dance moves with your troupe, we must resist the temptation to gather so that we can enjoy Mardi Gras together next year.

Please remember to wear a mask, practice social distancing, and get the vaccine if you are eligible. With that, enjoy this Mardi Gras and Valentine’s issue and remember: We will ride again!

Farewell and thanks to Kathy Bradshaw for her years of contribution as Executive Editor at Where Y’at. Kathy is leaving New Orleans but will continue to contribute her wonderful articles. She will be missed!

Welcome to Burke Bischoff as our new Executive Editor; we know that he will do a fantastic job.

–Josh Danzig, Publisher

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PHOTOS, CLOCKWISE FROM TOP: KATHY BRADSHAW; ADOBE STOCK (2); SABRINA STONE; WHERE Y'AT PHOTO

Publisher/Editor-in-Chief: Josh Danzig

Food & Drink

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G N I L L E C C A N RNI CA VAL :

Six Mardi Gras Maskers

The Times That Mardi Gras Was Called Off

By Burke Bischoff

Few things are as synonymous with New Orleans’s identity as Mardi Gras.

While Mobile may have been the first city in America to celebrate Carnival, popular culture recognizes New Orleans as the epicenter of American Mardi Gras, because traditions such as parades with floats and throws originated here. So when Mayor LaToya Cantrell announced on November 17, 2020, that no parades are allowed to roll for Carnival 2021 because of COVID-19, no doubt many heard that as Mardi Gras being officially cancelled for this year.

While it’s certainly disheartening not to have familiar festive levity after the slog that was 2020, this is not the only time in the city’s history that Carnival parades were banned.

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Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

most prevalent.

Poor sanitation and a lack of understanding that stagnant a c water and n, an On M he r e w t o f o ir se the mosquitos becau ople held . pe helped to spread Many in costume ts the disease led New Orleans s tr e e to experience constant outbreaks. During Algiers F an 1878 epidemic that was tearing through the Lower loa Mississippi Valley, New Orleans saw 20,000 infections, 5,000 St. Roch, t in 1919 deaths, and about 20 percent of the city’s population leave.

Therefore, in 1879, only Rex rolled on Mardi Gras Day, while Since its other krewes did not. inception in 1857, New When New Orleans entered into the 20th century, three Orleans Mardi Gras has either been cancelled or major wars hampered the city’s parade krewes. The first was massively scaled back 13 other times. There have when the United States got involved in World War I, which been instances of disease and local conflict putting a stopped Carnival in 1918. Plus, Spanish flu was in full force stop to parading, but most of the cancellations were triggered by war, the first instance being the Civil War. that same year, so that didn’t help the situation. With 54,000 infected and 3,500 deaths, it was no surprise that Mardi Gras New Orleans was, at the time, the largest city in the 1919 ended up not taking place. After that, World War II South, and its location on the Mississippi River made effectively knocked out parades from 1942 to 1945. And then, it an important lifeline for the Confederate Army, as in 1951, President Harry Truman declared a state of emergency well as a major target for the Union. This eventually because of the Korean War, thus cancelling the Comus, Rex, led to the city’s capture by Union forces and its new Proteus, and Momus parades again for that year. However, military governor, Benjamin Butler, imposing a harsh martial law during his control of the city. So, from 1862 many members of different krewes did end up getting together to throw a ball on Lundi Gras and to do one patriotic-themed to when the war ended in 1865, the Mistick Krewe of parade on Mardi Gras Day as the Krewe of Patria.

Comus, the oldest and only New Orleans krewe at the Before the recent COVID-19 cancellation, the last time time, did not parade. parades didn’t roll in New Orleans was in 1979 because of a In 1875, during Reconstruction, both Comus and conflict between the New Orleans Police Department and Mayor the newly formed Rex decided not to parade, due to Ernest “Dutch” Morial. The Police Association of New Orleans civil unrest brought on by the Battle of Liberty Place.

This event saw the Crescent City White League, pretty demanded a salary increase, which the mayor refused to give.

In retaliation, NOPD decided to strike right before Mardi Gras much a local terrorist militia made up of Confederate Day, stopping Carnival dead in its tracks. As a result, many of veterans, attempting to overthrow the Louisiana state government. On September 14, 1874, 5,000 members the krewes either decided not to have a parade (including Rex, of the league stormed onto Canal Street, fought against Comus, and Zulu) or moved to neighboring parishes instead.

While not having Mardi Gras parades this year does hurt in local police and state militia, and occupied City Hall and the moment, it has to be put into perspective. For a tradition parts of Downtown for three days. League members that has been going on for about 163 years, to have only 14 eventually left the city because federal troops were cancellations—and those usually because of a major national or being brought in as reinforcements. This conflict left world event—is pretty amazing. Even more remarkable is the more than 30 people dead and almost 80 injured.

Just four years later, New Orleans found itself in the sheer resilience of New Orleanians. More often than not, even middle of a crisis that was all too familiar: yellow fever. when parades couldn’t happen, costume balls were still thrown, With it being a major port city, New Orleans was always people gathered in the streets for impromptu parades—Mardi Gras still happened. Carnival is in the city’s blood, so locals in contact with many ships, cargo, and crew from Africa, the Caribbean, and South America. This, in turn, won’t stop celebrating it, even if there are no parades or krewes. But still, let’s hope some floats and good times can roll left the city vulnerable to any foreign diseases that again in 2022. these ships carried, and yellow fever was one of the

St. Canarlade n o s a n ot p ration Celeb1919, Rex didr. Instead, u t p m a Imprordi Gras Day einntly ended wd roamed the

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Revelers had spontaneous celebrations on Canal Street when festivities were cancelled in 19181919

A FAIRE OF THE HEART:

AVERTISEMENT

There’s New Orleans Love in Every Bottle of Faire la Fête Sparkling Wine Faire la Fête is a unique sparkling wine that is like New Orleans in liquid form: It’s got history, flavor, and effervescence. Its label shows the Mardi Gras colors of purple and green; its name is the French translation of “to party”—one of the things that New Orleanians do best. And its story is one man’s quest to capture his love for New Orleans in a bottle and to share it with the world.

Champagne-drinkers say that, almost instantly, the bubbles get to them, leaving them feeling lightheadedly content or even surprisingly euphoric. It can’t be purely by coincidence, then, that wine expert Peter Baedeker experienced a very similar feeling the minute he set foot in New Orleans, when he arrived from California as a Tulane student years ago.

“I was one of those people who fell in love from the moment I walked down St. Charles for the first time,” Baedeker says. “New Orleans was in my blood.”

He fell in love yet again later, when he met his now-wife Erica, proposed to her at Jazz Fest, and married her in the Lower Garden District. The couple would have happily stayed in New Orleans permanently, sipping their wine from go-cups, but Hurricane Katrina chased them off.

Baedeker returned to California and began working in the wine business. During a trip with a wine distributor to southwestern France in 2010, he visited the small town of Limoux, near Carcassonne. Like most wine experts—even master sommeliers—and the majority of the wine-drinking world, Baedeker thought that the Champagne region of northeastern France had invented sparkling wine. He was surprised to discover, therefore, that the real creators of sparkling wine are the ancestors of the farmers of Limoux, who first began making it as far back as 1531—long before Champagne stole both the bubbly’s characteristic in-bottle fermentation process and the credit for its creation.

And that’s not all that Limoux is known for. They also have been celebrating Mardi Gras, which they call a “Fête,” every year since 1532, in honor of their fizzy masterpiece. It’s the longest-standing Carnival celebration in Europe.

“It was so reminiscent of New Orleans, I couldn’t believe it,” explains Baedeker. “They masked; it’s got the classic colors of green and purple and gold. They do it during the Carnival season, and they just keep doing these big parties. It’s centered around the fact that they invented sparkling wine and really never got credit for it.”

The Fête festivities culminate in the town center of Limoux, where the historic fountain there is emptied of water and filled instead with Limoux sparkling wine.

“I was like, ‘Oh my gosh, this is like a mini-New Orleans. This ties together everything I love, which is wine—especially champagne—and the New Orleans culture of Mardi Gras and the Fête,’” he says. “It was very much tied to this city that I, to this day, still love.”

He knew then that he had to somehow recognize the connection to New Orleans and to celebrate those things that he so adores. Baedeker was bubbling with enthusiasm about the bubbly. And ever since that moment, he has been keeping his feelings bottled up—in the form of Faire la Fête.

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The History of the Mardi Gras Loot We Love

By Kathy Bradshaw

Fun isn’t the only motivating factor at Mardi Gras anymore. The holiday has become something of a competitive sport of Olympic proportions, with everyone trying to outdo each other at one contest or another: Who can drink the most? Put together the fanciest costume? Find the best spot on the parade route? Manage to score a Dong Phuong king cake?

And, perhaps most importantly, who can get the biggest beads, the most coconuts, the best purse, and even just one Muses shoe?

Recently, Mardi Gras seems to be fundamentally about how much stuff you can collect at the parades—stuff that’s stuffed, glowing, labeled, themed, flashing, hanging, noise-making, or that you can drink out of. In fact, how much Mardi Gras loot you gather is directly proportionate to how much of a good time you have. What you bring home from the parade is almost a source of self-validation, and if you don’t walk away with multiple bags overflowing with primarily useless crap, well then, you feel like a failure.

Therefore, in order to catch these coveted throws, you’re willing to step in front of people, knock someone down, use your children as bait, or offer bribes. You make eye contact with the float rider, you smile and beg, you offer up a fifth of whiskey— only to watch as he gives that coveted throw to the hot girl standing next to you or the tourist with the “My First Mardi Gras!” sign.

It’s enough to make you throw your hands up in defeat, or to throw a fit. We all love those

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throws.

Because not only is there something inherently cool about getting something for free, whether you want it or not (think free donuts in the conference room), but there’s something even more exciting about one-upping your neighbor to get something for free that is far better than what he got gratis (think getting the only donut in the box with rainbow sprinkles on top).

Yet Mardi Gras goodies weren’t always so sought-after, and getting them wasn’t always so cut-throat. How did we get to the point where we’d trade our firstborn for a light-up plastic sword; a purple, green, and gold toilet brush; or a giant plush crawfish?

Carl Mack, of the Mardi Gras Museum of Costumes and Culture in the French Quarter, explains that the tradition of throwing things at Mardi Gras traces its origins to the beginnings of Carnival itself, as far back as

Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

the 1500s in Europe. Our “Carnival” is a translation of the Spanish word Carnavale, which comes from the root words for meat and go—so, in other words “meat to go,” or “farewell to the flesh.” Back then, they had very cold winters and would save up mountains of meat to eat during the winter months, when food was harder to come by. But as spring rolled around, whatever meat was still left over had to be consumed, and quickly, before it went bad. So, everyone would party and feast and gorge themselves on meat to deplete the supplies, and all that carnivorous cavorting became knowns as Carnavale.

Afterwards, no one ate meat for quite some time, either because overindulgence made it lose its appeal or religion required it. Those months of meatlessness became known as Lent.

As part of early Carnavale festivities, the nobility would disguise themselves with masks, so as not to be recognized, or else dress up in their fanciest clothes, and ride through the town trying to endear themselves to the peasants by showering them with gifts and tokens. They threw them beads and coins, which, at the time, were actually worth something.

“If you open up a Spanish treasure chest, what have you got inside? Beads and coins.

That was currency,” says Mack. “Manhattan Island was bought for a bunch of beads.”

(These days, beads won’t even get you so much as a bagel in New York City.)

So began the tradition of throws.

The custom continued in Paris and other European cities as big-hearted merrymakers would distribute sweets (such as sugar-coated almonds) to onlooking ladies—a practice that was carried over to New Orleans in the 1830s, when women on French Quarter balconies were flung candy from below.

The first known throws from a Mardi Gras float came from Santa himself, riding in the Twelfth Night Revelers parade on January 7, 1871. This Carnival Claus exhibited his usual generosity, throwing plenty of gifts—allegedly from the famous “variety, curiosity,” and toy store Piffet’s on Canal Street—to eager parade-goers.

Although the revered Krewe of Rex began throwing metal medallions—likely the precursors to doubloons—as early as 1884, the doubloon was officially invented by Rex in 1960. That year, the krewe tossed as many as 80,000 of these metal coins in their parade, all of them etched with the krewe’s insignia. This was the first time that throws were exclusive to a particular krewe, a custom that is commonplace today—everything from plastic cups to rubber duckies, Frisbees to footballs now come adorned with a krewe name and logo.

By 1921, Rex was insisting that its members pass out throws during parades, and the distribution of Mardi Gras swag was forevermore ingrained in Carnival culture.

Early beads were relatively upscale necklaces made of handblown glass and cut crystal from Czechoslovakia, which were the norm until right around WWII. By the 1950s and 60s, however, the material had been switched to plastic and the manufacturing moved to China. Today, of course, China has its hands in our Mardi Gras as much as it does in our politics.

An estimated 25 million pounds of Mardi Gras beads are thrown each year (roughly the equivalent weight of the Eiffel Tower), the majority of which are made in China, along with countless other plastic gadgets and goodies thrown to the throngs.

“The people in China who are making these big plastic cigars [that the Krewe of Zulu throws] are probably wondering why New Orleans needs 20,000 plastic cigars a year,” says Mack.

In recent times, throws have gotten more sophisticated, more elaborate, more diverse—

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THROWS OF PASSION

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Beads by the bagful

…and other assorted loot

you’re wondering where this custom of questionable taste originated, Mack explains: “That really grew out of trying to catch the attention of a float rider. Here comes this float moving down the street, and you’ve got thousands of people trying to catch their attention. You’ve got about five seconds” to stand out. Yes, indecent exposure is always a sure way to get noticed, even in New Orleans.

Scoring bags full of throws at every parade is kind of a mixed bag. Besides the high you get from winning piles of take-home souvenirs for free, catching throws makes Mardi Gras parades not only something you watch, but something you really take part in—the difference between standing on the sidelines and really getting into the game.

But on the other hand, Mardi Gras festivities produce some 50 to 80 million pounds (the weight of half a million beer kegs) of non-recyclable garbage, much of which comes from discarded throws.

We have beads clogging our gutters and weighing down our trees. Yet we also repurpose beads for art, costumes, and home décor, and bead-recycling programs provide local jobs. Throws give us color and vibrancy, memories and stories.

They are collector’s items.

When it comes down to it, Mardi Gras just wouldn’t be Mardi Gras without throws.

And although the parades may be canceled this year, we will always carry on the Mardi Gras spirit—that New Orleans flair.

Whatever life throws our way.

CLOCKWISE, FROM TOP LEFT: COURTESY MARDIGRASOUTLET.COM; KATHY BRADSHAW (3)

and more expensive. Dan Kelly of the iconic Mardi Gras store Beads by the Dozen estimates that the throw business today is a $30 million industry in New Orleans alone, generating $50 million to $60 million nationally. While krewe members used to be able to get away with dropping just a couple hundred bucks on parade giveaways, they now regularly throw down as much as a couple thousand on throws—an increase in expenses commonly referred to as “bead inflation.”

And what isn’t purchased is hand-made, as krewe members get creative and crafty, devoting immeasurable hours all year long to painting coconuts, glittering shoes, and embellishing purses.

With all these many prizes being flung from floats, something needs to keep it all in check to avoid total chaos.

Therefore, when it comes to what can and can’t be thrown from a float, “there are rules,” Mack points out. Nothing is allowed that is commercially branded, overtly dangerous, or unsanitary. In the 1980s, following multiple coconut calamities as parade-goers were injured by the weight and trajectory of these throws, a law was passed that coconuts must now be gingerly handed down from floats (and yet throwing hefty strings of massive beads is still fair game). No food can be thrown, unless packaged—a rule that is clearly thrown by the wayside when it comes to St. Patrick’s Day parades. And in addition to being just plain uncool, flashing for beads is also technically illegal. In case

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THE MEANING OF MARDI GRAS A 1917 Mardi Gras parade brings out a festive crowd on Canal Street

Christmas movies often contain lines about the true meaning of that holiday and how the spirit of it is the most important aspect. There aren’t many Mardi Gras movies out there, but the characters in such a film would surely have a similar moment of reflection.

Before that Mardi Gras movie gets made, let’s talk to locals about what Mardi Gras means to them.

“For me, Mardi Gras is my life,” explained teacher and Where Y’at contributor Kimmie Tubre. “I was born during the season and have only missed two Mardi Gras since. Both times, I was out of the country. I must say that missing Mardi Gras was pretty difficult for a NOLA girl like me.”

Even those who found their way to New Orleans later in life feel that Mardi Gras is an integral part of their year and their life. Randy Traylor, Professor of Motor Vehicle Technology at Delgado Community College, has fully inserted himself into the old traditions of New Orleans Mardi Gras.

“I’m not a native New Orleanian, but I feel like one now, after living here since 1978. Mardi Gras is awesome!”

Traylor said. “What a great adventure in a beautiful city, with family, friends, neighbors, and, of course, new friends every year enjoying the great festivities: parades, people, food, beverages, and the main event—Endymion.”

Traylor has lived on the Endymion

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parade route since 1980, and he definitely makes sure to claim a spot right outside of his house every year, even though he doesn’t watch the parade himself.

“You always meet the same people every year and a lot of new folks the Saturday before Mardi Gras,” he added.

“I have not seen the parade from my house in almost 30 years, though. I have been fortunate to be a krewe member in Endymion for this long and ride in the parade every year—the smiles and crowd noises, dancing in the streets, people who come from all over the world to see 3,000 krewe members bearing gifts. The celebration will be missed this year, but we will be ready next year. I love it!”

Another float rider and life-long Mardi Gras enthusiast, Vee George, is proud to say that she has celebrated Mardi Gras and helped others to do so for decades.

She explained, “I am born and raised in New Orleans. For the past 16 years, I have been running the parade stand for the disabled residents and for individuals

FROM ST. CHARLES HOTEL’S COMPLIMENTARY 1917 BOOKLET, SOUVENIR OF NEW ORLEANS. THE CITY THAT CARE FORGOT / LIBRARY OF CONGRESS

By Emily Hingle

with disabilities that would come into our city. I maintained that stand for the city of New Orleans that sat across from Gallier Hall. Needless to say, I’ve been at every parade for work for the past 16 years and have enjoyed it and have made Mardi Gras a beautiful experience for persons with disabilities.

“For the past six years, I was in Nyx. I absolutely loved the sisterhood that Nyx brought. I just love the whole atmosphere of Mardi Gras. I go to several balls and parties with Zulu, Orpheus, Endymion, and Nyx.” After a controversial statement made by the captain, Julie Lea, George left Nyx, as so many other once-faithful riders did.

She stated about the mass exodus, “Not being in Nyx is a huge loss, and it’s a big division for us to go into three different organizations like we have. This Covid situation is not helping. I’m the person who goes anywhere and tries to talk to everybody. For us not being able to be that type of social, it’s very tough. As much as I love Mardi Gras, and it has been a part of my life since birth in so many ways, I do believe it is the absolute best call to cancel parades.”

In addition to spectating and riding, there are many proud and long-running walking/marching krewes that get to experience Mardi Gras in a different way. Michael Anding of the Lyons Club, established in 1946, marched as the krewe’s Grand Marshal in 2020. The Lyons

Club parades between Zulu and Rex every Mardi Gras day.

He explained his take on Mardi Gras: “As a native New Orleanian, I have grown up experiencing Mardi Gras in the streets of the city. I couldn’t imagine it any other way. From the costumes and music to the friends and family, the joys and jubilation abound. It’s a time of year when troubles are put to the side and our community comes together, with dancing in the streets and brass music at any intersection. I’ve been a member of the Lyons Carnival Club for eight years now and am the vice president of the club. We strut our stuff up and down the streets, waking up the neighborhoods Uptown early Mardi Gras morning before making our way to St. Charles, where we pass by the grandstands, and down into the Quarter, where we continue our festivities into the night. From gifting throws for cheek kisses to waltzing in the streets with strangers, late-night parties and extravagant balls, food that never ends, and friends and family all around. I love Mardi Gras!”

Mardi Gras will not be the same in 2021 as in most years past. There will be no parades, no lavish balls, and some krewes have even chosen not to name a new court. However, the spirit of Mardi Gras will live on in the hearts of those who always celebrate it. Much like those sappy holiday movie lines, Mardi Gras is all about loving one another.

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SHOWING YOUR KREWE COLORS: The History of Purple, Green, and Gold

Almost 150 years ago, the Rex Organization was created to orchestrate a citywide Mardi Gras party to impress the grand duke of Russia, who was visiting during Carnival season, and to boost the city’s tourism economy. The School of Design, which, to this day, is responsible for Rex’s parade, branded Rex “King of Carnival.” They published “proclamations” in newspapers to convince the entire city to drape their balconies with purple, green, and gold. Since then, those colors have come to symbolize New Orleans, in general, and our Mardi Gras, specifically, the world over.

No one is really sure why these colors were selected, although, to be on brand, they certainly would have to convey kingliness. Gold may seem like an obvious choice, but purple and green also have a long-established association with royalty and status. Why would particular colors be more associated with wealth, power, and stability than others? Some colors are rare in nature, and making color requires natural resources. As any painter or designer

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Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

would tell you, wielding color is expensive. Purple and green require all three primary colors, which makes our Mardi Gras palette the epitome of opulence in itself.

Purple pigment from manganese and hematite powder first appeared in cave paintings between 18,000 and 27,000 years ago. However, it is Tyrian Purple dye that likely kickstarted purple’s imperial reputation. The word purple itself is rooted in the Latin term purpura, for

the mollusk that produces the color. It takes 10,000 to 250,000 snails to manufacture a single gram of Tyrian Purple. That’s enough dye to tint a single sleeve, which, even today, will cost you over $2,700. Only the most elite royals accented their garments with, for example, stripes of purple—so, the bigger the stripe, the more powerful the person.

But beyond being costly, the actual color of Tyrian

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Purple dye is unpredictable. Ranging from indigos and blues to mauve, every batch is different. Manufacturing stable and safe pigments and dyes is no easy task, and both purple and green pigments have been particularly troublesome in the making. Ancient Egyptians used malachite to paint their god of fertility, rebirth, and the underworld, Osiris, green, but the pigment turned black over time. Ancient Romans discovered that they could soak copper plates in wine to create verdigris, but verdigris not only turns brown or black over time, but it is also toxic to the artisans producing it.

Wielding color, then, is costly in other ways. At the end of the 18th century, a chemist synthesized Scheele’s Green, a

bright green pigment made with the deadly poison arsenite. Legends of women being killed by poison in their dresses come from the real-life horrors of cloth being dyed with Scheele’s Green. Wallpaper treated with the pigment made children sick, and some even believe it caused Napoleon’s death. The first synthetic purple, Perkin’s Mauve, also contained arsenic, as did Paris Green, which replaced Scheele’s Green and is thought to have caused widespread illness among artists in the 19th century.

Thankfully, there are safer forms of pigment available today, so every person who lives in or visits New Orleans can don purple, green, and gold—or at least yellow gold. One of the oldest pigments wielded by humans is ochre. Ochres are non-toxic clay-

and plant-based pigments, easy to make at home. It isn’t precious gold metal, but yellow ochre, the color that appears on our contemporary Mardi Gras flags and t-shirts, that is associated with contemporary Carnival culture in New Orleans. The color of the imperishable sun and of pollen in spring flowers, yellow gold is associated more with seasonal renewal and divinity than ruling classes.

When paired with yellow gold as opposed to precious metal, purple and green take on other more obvious pagan and Catholic connotations. Egypt’s god of the underworld, painted green, embodied the earth’s ability to resurrect each year.

Dionysus (Bacchus), god of purple wine and the green vine, dies and is resurrected

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each year as well—and it is the springtime rituals of Dionysian cults that evolved into Carnival. Corresponding with Easter, Mardi Gras, too, is a celebration of rebirth each spring, when the sun makes its awesome comeback, the earth blooms green, and, in New Orleans, giant irises (in a hue of Tyrian Purple) blossom once again.

Most locals will tell you that our Mardi Gras colors stand for justice, faith, and power (purple, green, and gold, respectively), but it is important to note that these colors were not picked because of their symbolic significance. It wasn’t until 1892— 50 years after the original branding event— that Rex rebranded Mardi Gras’s palette with the parade theme “Symbolism of Colors.”

Symbolism aside, it was Impressionist artists—with their preferences for violet, marigold, and emerald—who made the palette wildly popular, both then and now.

Trends and symbolic associations may change, but our Mardi Gras brand of purple, green, and gold has only become more relevant to New Orleans’s cultural identity.

Purple, in particular, in the 20th century, became associated with civil rights and countercultural movements: Women’s Suffrage in the early 1900s, the LGBT activists of Lavender Menace in the 1960s, and the psychedelic social, music, and artistic uprising of the 1960s and 1970s.

Royalty and divinity, it seems, have less to do with riches and gold and more to do with being creatively fruitful and having the ability to bounce back. What better brand could possibly exist for New Orleans?

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KATHY BRADSHAW (2)

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CELEBRATING LOVE The CovidFriendly Way

By Kimmie Tubre

Hello, February! Yes, love is in the air, but it is not the only thing lurking in the breeze. Even with vaccinations happening and hope being restored, that evil old Covid is still wandering about, making it hard for many to live and enjoy some of life’s simple pleasures. As Valentine’s Day approaches, lovers are unsure how to safely celebrate through such testy times. While some feel safe dining in the city’s many fine establishments, others may feel the need to stay away from public places this year.

A VIRTUAL PAINT-AND-SIP PARTY Let’s start with the fun and romantic paint-and-sip party.

This is something that you can do in several different ways. If you’re with a new date, you could always set up a virtual paint-party Zoom call. You could even invite others to join you. This way, you are in the comfort of your own homes, and there’s no pressure as you paint and sip away. You can choose whether to hire an instructor or save money by watching an instructional video. A good ol’ Bob Ross classic will do the trick.

If you feel comfortable being in the same place with your love, you can set up the paint party at your home together while being guided by a virtual instructor.

Whichever way you decide, what’s most important is that you paint, sip, and enjoy.

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COVID-19 redefines "safe sex" this Valentine's Day DIY COCKTAIL-MAKING OR COOKING CLASS Sticking with all things virtual, one amazingly fun thing you and your partner can do is to take an online cooking class or simply to teach each other a new recipe. There’s always something that your partner may not know how to cook. Valentine’s Day is a great day to teach them. And if neither of you are cooks, a good recipe or YouTube cooking video will suffice. If you have the money to spend, you could always hire a personal cook to teach the two of you some things, whether in-person or virtually.

Cocktail-making is also very fun and will bring out the bartender in you. There are so many amazing

Virtual cooking class for two

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Luckily, there isn’t just one blueprint for Valentine’s Day. In fact, you and your loved one can make your own rules as to how you want to spend the day. Whether it’s with a lover or with a group of friends, Where Y’at has conjured up some fun, unique, and Covid-friendly ways to celebrate the holiday of love.

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cocktails out there to try, and it would be a lot of fun to try making them with someone special. You can do this together in the same home or FaceTiming from afar.

Making cocktails is an exciting way to enjoy the lush in each other.

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Speaking of food and beverages, there’s nothing more fun than enjoying a good tasting party.

Let’s start with beer-tasting. Find some of your favorite local beers and make a tally card. Taste them and vote, and then you can Intimate tasting parties compare the results. This will offer relaxed dress codes make for a good discussion as well as a nice buzz. You can also try out different wines and champagnes, if that tickles your fancy.

If alcohol isn’t your thing, do a pastry- or dessert-tasting instead. It will be just as fun and definitely satisfying.

A HOMEBOUND GETAWAY These days, the idea of going away to a spa or dining in a restaurant can be a scary thought for some. It can also be quite costly. One way to stay safe and save money is to find a room in your home and make it into the perfect getaway for you, your lover, or even your friends. All it takes is good food, music, and candles to set the mood for an amazing dinner.

With Valentine’s Day being on a Sunday this year, you can set up the perfect brunch, right at the kitchen table. Nothing says bottomless mimosas like the ones you can make at home.

What about a spa day? Well, the bathroom can make for a pleasant spa atmosphere.

Filling a tub with body-soothing oils and fragrant scents can create a good, relaxing spa experience right inside your own home.

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If you are uncomfortable with inviting strangers inside of your home, you can plan a couple’s massage for each other. Take turns playing massage therapist. Create a menu for your partner and set the tone. The beauty of doing it yourself means that you can make it as fancy or as low-key as you’d like.

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Despite the circumstances, there are many ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day this year.

Whether it’s with friends or a lover, in-person or virtually, what’s most important during these times is to share these experiences with the ones you love. Valentine’s Day is more than a commercial holiday; it’s a holiday of love, and right now, we all need love more than ever. So whatever you choose, be sure to stay safe and enjoy your Covid-friendly Valentine’s Day.

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CROSS PURPOSES:

How to Get Across the Mississippi River

The Crescent City Connection spanning Old Muddy at sunrise 22

Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

S E A N PAV O N E / A D O B E S T O C K

By Steve Melendez

New Orleans was built around the Mississippi River, and as long as there’s been a city here, people have been looking to travel up and down the river— and across it. Because of rough conditions from the river itself and the nature of the dirt around it, a clay-rich muck sometimes referred to as gumbo soil, engineers were unable to build a bridge across the Mississippi in the area until the Huey P. Long Bridge opened in the 1930s. Here are some of the ways people crossed, and still cross, the mighty Mississippi in New Orleans.

Crescent City Connection The bridge known today as the Crescent City Connection is now an iconic part of the New Orleans skyline and an essential tool for thousands of commuters going to and from the Westbank by car and public bus every day. It was first opened in 1958, when it was known as the Greater New Orleans, or GNO, Bridge, as some longtime residents of the city still know it. Christened with a mixture

WhereYat.com | February 2021

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of liquors from nations that trade through the Port of New Orleans, the bridge was at the time the longest cantilever bridge in the United States and opened the Westbank to further development by cementing its ties to Downtown New Orleans.

As of 1988, amid rising commuter traffic, the current second span was added to the bridge, splitting eastbound and westbound traffic. A public contest was held to select a name for the combined bridge system, and a fourth-grade class at Metairie’s St. Clement of Rome School submitted the winning entry of “Crescent City Connection.”

While a toll was long required, that was eliminated in 2013. Carrying the highway known as U.S. 90 Business, it’s still the furthest bridge downriver on the Mississippi and often ranked among the highest-traffic bridges in the country.

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This rail-and-auto bridge, crossing the Mississippi in Jefferson Parish just a few miles from New Orleans, was opened in 1935, as the first Mississippi span in the state. It was named for Long, the notorious governor-turned-U.S. senator who backed public works projects that transformed the state but was known for his strict control over Louisiana institutions.

Long was assassinated at the state capitol in Baton Rouge just a few months before the bridge opened.

At the time, the New Orleans Item newspaper waxed poetic about a farmer who had “never been higher in the air than his hayloft” taking the bridge and for the first time getting “a panoramic view of the land on which he lives and toils.” It was then the longest railroad bridge in the world and reduced the need for railroad traffic to cross the river by barge or ferry.

While much automotive traffic would later migrate to the Crescent City Connection closer to Downtown New Orleans, the bridge was still widened in 2013 to add an additional lane of travel for cars taking U.S. Highway 90 across the bridge, with the addition of roadside shoulders and wider lanes to improve safety.

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New Orleans Ferries Long before there were bridges across the Mississippi, people and cargo crossed the water by ferry. While Native Americans had rowed across the river long before colonization, the first post-colonial commercial ferries began operating between Algiers Point and the French Quarter area in the 1820s, harnessing steam power to swiftly cross the river.

For more than a century, until the Huey P. Long Bridge was opened, ferries and badgers were the primary way to cross the river, with some even equipped with deck-top rails so train cars could roll on board. Since the opening of the Huey P. Long Bridge and what’s now the Crescent City Connection, crossing via the bridges has become the norm, but regular ferry service still runs across various points along the Mississippi in Louisiana.

This includes the public ferry from Algiers Point to Canal Street, which is popular with both commuters and tourists, and the ferry from Lower Algiers to Chalmette in St. Bernard Parish.

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The gondola ride across the Mississippi River was built for access to the Louisiana World Exposition, or the 1984 World's Fair in New Orleans. Officially known as the "Mississippi Aerial River Transit" or (MART).

Poeyfarre Street, New Orleans Warehouse District, Jan 2019 MART gondola car now used as decoration.

Mississippi Aerial River Transit During the 1980s, in time for the 1984 World’s Fair, New Orleans introduced a distinctive way to cross the Mississippi: an aerial gondola system known as Mississippi Aerial River Transit, or MART, backed by investors including Mardi Gras float kingpin Blaine Kern. The system, which transported riders in small cars pulled along cables between towers on each side of the river, was initially only for fairgoers. It was designed to provide not only alternative transportation from parking sites on the Westbank to the fair, in what’s now called the Warehouse District, but also an aerial view of the river, city skyline, and nightly fireworks at the fair.

Like other aspects of the World’s Fair, attendance was much less than expected, and while the system was briefly kept in place for commuter use after the fair ended, it was soon shut down amid continued low ridership. After initial plans to relocate the system to Corpus Christi, Texas, for tourist use, and hopes by Kern that it could transport tourists to Mardi Gras World, it was ultimately torn down in 1994 after complaints by the Coast Guard.

Some of the cars were sold for hunting and fishing shelters, and some were bought for the Olde N'Awlins Cookery to use as dining booths before being resold to benefit the LSPCA.

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GOING THE SOCIAL DISTANCE: Running and Racing During COVID-19

Racing apps are keeping the the running community moving

Since the beginning of the pandemic, news outlets have continually highlighted the growing number of Americans taking up running. The media hype has been reminiscent of that of the late ‘70s running boom ushered in by Jim Fixx and his The Complete Book of Running. The main difference between then and now is that 40 years ago, millions of people were brought together through the shared goal of running towards better health; today, we run to keep our distance from each other and away from a virus that has infected nearly 26 million and stolen more than 429,000 lives across the country.

Perhaps running feels like a social distance-friendly fitness choice due to the long-standing stereotype of the lone long-distance runner: up, amassing endless miles in the early-morning fog between dark and dawn with nothing but his or her thoughts and the dead silence of the resting world to keep him or her company. However, for many of us (myself included) who are up pounding the pavement before most people have had their morning coffee, we are striving towards the sport’s exceedingly social endgame: racing.

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During a race, creating distance between yourself and others is a good thing—at least, between the start and finish lines and prior to the post-competition festivities. Like most everything in 2020, however, local races were cancelled, postponed, or diverted to the digital realm.

I was initially averse to virtual racing. My attitude changed, however, when I saw that two of my favorite local races, the Crescent City Classic and the Rock ‘n’ Roll New Orleans Marathon, would not be holding live races during

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BLUE RIBBON RUNS ✭ worth the app ✭ For those seeking socially distanced digital competition on a regular basis, here are a few apps you can incorporate into your COVID-19 training routine:

STRAVA IOS/Android – strava.com Strava is not only my top pick, I also consider it a must-have. Currently, all users have free access to join user-created competitions. During COVID-19, I have participated with runners around the world in completing more than 140 miles and measuring a gained elevation of more than 15 miles all in a single month. Many in-person running/ fitness clubs, including NOLA’s own November Project, which continues to meet safely each week with socialdistance protocols in place, regularly host competitions via the app. Strava uses your phone’s internal GPS, not a map app, to measure your stats, preserving your data plan. The paid subscription doesn’t appear to offer much that you can’t get from a fitness tracker (Garmin, FitBit, etc.)— save your money.

2021. My long, cherished history with these races inspired me to reconsider virtual participation as a way to support these events.

“You can imagine the financial hit we took missing out on 20,000-plus runners in 2020, “ says Eric Stuart, race director for the Crescent City Classic, referencing last year’s event.

“We knew we had to do something for the folks who had been training since the fall. That’s when we came up with the virtual option.”

Stuart says that the Crescent City Fitness Foundation used the mobile app RaceJoy to host the majority of its 2020 race series, including its flagship “Classic,” which drew roughly 5,000 participants.

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running companies that are already going out of business,” says Stuart.

“People considering virtual races also need to understand that you’re not only funding putting on the race, you’re funding a portion of the charity that it supports. If you don’t continue to provide support for these events, the Apps impose races will go away, but so, too, will a a virtual win lot of real viable charity organizations.”

(The Crescent City Classic, Rock ’n’ 20 through April 3, 2021, to complete the Roll Marathon, and most local races event via RaceJoy. champion charitable beneficiaries.)

While Stuart says that virtual races have If your favorite race is not hosting a live been successful given the circumstances, event this year, or if you are not comfortable they are no substitute for live events. with in-person gatherings, please consider “If we don’t get back to actual racing researching the event’s online outlet for again [by 2022], I’m not sure if we’re going information on virtual alternatives or other 1/22/21 9:54 AM to be viable as an entity. I know smaller ways to show your support.

ZOMBIES, RUN! IOS/Android What may seem like a gimmick has been going strong for more than eight years. The app “gamifies” your training by creating a narrated story where you retrieve items and escape from zombies. There is a large amount of free content, and you can access additional resources via in-app purchases. For me, solo running is a meditative activity, so I could not get into this app.

Aside from horror- and The Walking Dead-enthu siasts, this app is best suited for those who enjoy adventure racing and other interactive runs.

y a D y r e v Make E y a d s e u T t Fa

HUMANA ROCK ‘N’ ROLL VIRTUAL RUNNING CLUB This is the perfect app for those who can’t wait for the race series to return to New Orleans in February 2022. After synching a GPS tracker to your account, you gain access to weekly challenges and races, training and nutrition tips, playlists, and more. The challenges are similar to those offered by Strava, but are cur ated by the RNR team. I’ve only been using the service for a short time but find it is a strong competitor (if not superior) to Strava.

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BACK ON TRACK: BENEFITS OF CHIROPRACTIC CARE

By Emily Hingle

If you’ve been working from home more or completely since the Covid pandemic began, you may be one of the many people starting to suffer from back and neck pain or discomfort. The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and dozens of news outlets around the world have reported on the surging problem of spinal issues since people are working for hours on end in makeshift workstations at home that aren’t fit for good posture. Maybe you find yourself sitting on your couch with your laptop in your lap, or you’re sitting at your kitchen table in a rigid wooden chair with no cushion. These kinds of home workstations could be damaging your bones and tissues.

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Chiropractic care may be one path you can take to correct the damage.

Chiropractic is the adjustment of the musculoskeletal and neuromuscular systems—systems that can affect several other areas of the body.

I began seeing a chiropractor at the age of 31 because my back would ache and feel like it had a massive amount of pressure in it after standing for a few hours at a time. That pain could even happen after just 20 or so minutes when vacuuming or lifting. The x-rays

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Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

Regular chiropractic care can improve mobility of the spine and other joints, including the hips, knees, and shoulders.

As a result, the muscles around or connected to those areas through the neuromuscular system can become looser and less restricted.

Because the nervous system can function more efficiently when the adjustments release built-up pressure around the spine and spinal cord, your circulatory system can function better as well. Many chiropractic patients report feeling better overall, feeling healthier, and feeling like their other systems, such as cognitive function, seem to be better. It can help with headaches, including migraines, for that same reason.

If you are working at home, or feel that you need to make a change in your office workspace to correct bad posture, there are steps you can take to make things a little easier on your spine. Don’t work from the couch for hours on end. It doesn’t give you proper back support. Invest in a desk and office chair or just invest in an office chair that you can use at a table of proper height, such as a dining room table. Use a standing desk or place your computer on a bar-top-height surface to work from standing up.

Proper ergonomic posture includes sitting or standing with your forearms parallel to the floor. Your thighs should also be parallel to the floor if you’re sitting. Computer screens should be at eye level so you’re not looking downward and straining your neck.

You can elevate your computer with a simple stack of books. You should sit in a position where your ears are in line with your shoulders and your shoulders are in line with your hips. Use a mouse instead of your laptop’s touchpad, so as not to hold your arm at an unnatural position in front of your body.

To further help your body maintain fluidity, walk around from time to time to avoid sitting in one position for long periods. Also, sitting near a natural light source can improve mood and energy levels. Taking time to stretch your body and managing your stress as much as possible are also recommended.

Chiropractic care may be what you need to get that pain out of your back.

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of my spine taken by my chiropractor showed that I had scoliosis in my mid-to-lower spine that was causing the discomfort. But after a few visits, I could stand with no pain or pressure for long periods of time, which was incredibly liberating and a relief.

When I feel pressure start to build again, or when I know that it might be coming soon, I make an appointment just to maintain my comfort. That happens once a month or every other month, depending on what kind of physical activity I’ve been doing lately. Digging a trench in my yard definitely called for a sooner-thannormal appointment, but I was amazed at how much I was able to dig with really no pain when I couldn’t even comfortably stand just months previously. Getting regular chiropractic care also improved my mood because I wasn’t constantly uncomfortable. It’s like I didn’t even realize how much pain my back was in until that pain was gone, and I felt more physically fluid and less stressed out.

Chiropractic care mostly involves spinal adjustments to correct subluxation (misalignments of the spine that compress and irritate nerve pathways). Your first visit to a chiropractor will likely involve a detailed discussion about where you’re experiencing pain, pressure, or numbness and some simple exercises to assess mobility as well as palpations.

Then you’ll probably have x-rays taken of the mid-section to see if you have an issue like scoliosis.

During a session, some chiropractors will relax the muscles before an adjustment by having you lie on a heating pad and/or electronic massager for a few minutes. The chiropractor will then have you lie on a specialty table for the adjustments.

Depending on your particular ailment, the chiropractor will move your body and apply pressure in such a way as to adjust your spine or other joints. The adjustments themselves can sound loud and frightening but are safe and therapeutic. You should not experience pain, but you may have some soreness after a session as your muscles adjust.

Chiropractic adjustments restore mobility of joints where tissue has been damaged from traumatic events such as car crashes, injuries, having regular bad posture, or a condition like scoliosis. Tissues in and around the joints become inflamed or diminished, and adjustments relieve those tissues of built-up pressure.

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BAKING WITH L❤VE: Cookies for Your Valentine

By Sabrina Stone

Valentine’s Day isn’t about chocolates and hearts and fluffy, huggable stuffed animals, though I very much enjoy those things—please bring them to me! Valentine’s Day is about showing someone you love that you love them. It’s about carving out a bit of time and doing something personal, something special. In my book, nothing says “I love you” more than a messy picnic and a batch of badly burnt cookies. *This is where I will mention that the recipe naturally lends itself to being gluten-free. If you substitute the 1½ cups of all-purpose flour with a gluten-free version, like Bob’s Red Mill Natural Foods or Trader Joe’s or King Arthur’s brand, it doesn’t change the texture much (which is usually the big issue with gluten-free baking). Because of the almond flour, it still retains its integrity, and I served the final product to several unsuspecting friends who had no idea that they were eating a gluten-free dessert.

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•

• • • • • • • • • • •

1 large egg 1½ sticks (unsalted) butter 1½ cups all-purpose flour ¾ cup almond flour ½ cup sugar (I used brown sugar) 1 tsp cinnamon (I’ve heard that you can also sub, with lemon zest, which is exciting, so maybe try that!

1 tsp vanilla extract ¼ tsp salt Some raspberry jam for filling (as much as you want!)

Or apricot jam (go crazy with your flavor choices! This one was yummy, too.)

Confectioner’s sugar

PREPARATION:

Making the dough itself is pretty straightforward. I beat all the ingredients together—wet first, then dry, and just sort of made a mess of it. Officially, you’re supposed to separate the ingredients to do it properly, so let’s try it that way.

• Whisk the 1½ sticks of (unsalted) butter, ½ cup of white (or brown) sugar, and 1 tsp cinnamon (or lemon zest) together, creating a fluffy texture. Add in the egg and 1 tsp vanilla extract and continue to beat until absorbed.

• In a bigger bowl, whisk together the 1½ cups of allpurpose flour, ¾ cup of almond flour, and ¼ tsp salt.

• Combine all of the ingredients together, without overmixing.

• Pat the dough into large pancakes, cover in plastic wrap, and refrigerate.

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Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

•

•

•

• •

Once the dough has hardened in the refrigerator, let it soften on the counter for 5 to 10 minutes. It should be soft enough to work with, but not sticky.

Roll out the dough between 2 sheets of wax paper, then recycle the paper by using it to line the baking sheets. The thickness of the dough and the size of the cookie cutters is really up to you. (You can even use a round cup to cut out the outer circle of the cookie and a knife to cut a hole of any shape in the center, by hand). As long as all of the cookies are uniform, it’ll be right.

Preheat the oven to 350°F. Make sure that you have an even amount of simple round cookies and round cookies with center holes. Bake them for 11 minutes if small and up to 18 minutes if larger.

Wait for the cookies to cool. Coat each circular cookie without a hole, upside down, on its flat side, in jam.

(Raspberry is the classic, but every flavor is pretty delicious, so feel free to experiment. I like apricot as an alternative.)

Sprinkle the cookies with the holes in the middle in confectioner’s sugar. Go crazy! It looks pretty. It tastes good. This is not the scientific part of the process.

Lightly place the sugared cookies on top of the jamcovered cookies.

We have reached the end of our baking adventure. The Linzer tarts have now been baked and constructed and should look like tiny works of art. *This recipe is ambitious, and I messed up my whole first batch, so the most important thing is to spend Valentine’s Day with someone who will tell you that you’re wonderful, even if your cookies aren’t. When you get them just right, however, they’re out of this world!

PICNIC SPOT SUGGESTIONS:

All right, now that you’ve made your fancy dessert, give yourself a break and pack sandwiches and fruit or takeout from your favorite restaurant in the picnic basket.

Be careful to bring plastic cups and plates, so you’re not dealing with broken glass and a crazy mess when things tip over.

Find a private spot in a grassy place. There are so many hidden ones in City Park, Audubon Park, Louis Armstrong Park, Lafreniere Park, by the bayou, the waterfront, and the End of the World.

If you’re looking for even more solitude, there are a ton of nature preserves, less than an hour from the city: Bayou Sauvage, Chalmette Battlefield, St. Bernard State Park, Bayou Segnette, Bogue Chitto— each one of them has spots that you can share with your loved one, some birds, and an alligator or two.

Enjoy the day. Enjoy every day.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

COURTESY SABR INA STONE

I’ve decided to tackle an unnecessarily complex doubletiered, almond flour-based, jam-filled baking recipe, because I enjoy a challenge and because that’s always been my mom’s favorite sweet treat.

Speaking of moms, every mom deserves some recognition on Valentine’s Day. It’s often stated that a mother’s greatest love is her child, so reciprocate.

Call her up. Send her a card. Pick out a bouquet of her favorite flowers. (Not everyone is a long-stemmed-redroses kind of gal.) What’s your mom’s favorite? Irises?

Dahlias? Peonies? Tulips? Come on, you should know this!

She’s your mom.

This valiant attempt at raspberry almond Linzer tarts is the Valentine’s Day card for mine.

WhereYat.com | February 2021

35

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A global pandemic sure takes the fun out of life. Everything's been cancelled, from family gatherings and local festivals to seeing the parades roll down St. Charles for Mardi Gras.

While we won't be huddled along the Avenue this year, swilling brews and stuffing our collective faces with king cake while we watch the marching bands and colorful floats roll by, arms raised in the hopes of catching yet one more plastic bit of Carnival treasure, that certainly doesn't mean we can't drink our desserts and eat them, too.

Of all the wonderful booze-infused desserts available to us here in New Orleans, from Cherries Jubilee and Bananas Foster to chocolate bourbon pecan pie, one of the most prolific would have to be the oh-so-modest bread pudding. Born almost a millennium ago in the 11th and 12th centuries, bread pudding started out life as a “poor man's” dessert, a frugal—and notably fabulous—way to use up stale, leftover bread. Like many recipes, it has evolved over the years to include more expensive ingredients, from employing different types of breads and pastries (such as Boucherie's noteworthy Krispy Kreme Bread Pudding) to the addition of liquorheavy sauces. In fact, in most current bread pudding recipes, it’s de rigueur to include a “hard sauce,” which is essentially butter, sugar, and some kind of booze, such as rum or whiskey.

In this city, it's difficult to find a menu that doesn't include a bread pudding dessert, especially at the old-school Creole restaurants, but they are found in less-conspicuous places as well. Take, for example, Parkway Bakery in the Bayou St. John neighborhood. Famous for serving po-boys to visitors and locals for over a century, they also offer a delightful bread pudding. Seriously though, when you think about it, what else would they do with their leftover loaves of Leidenheimer French bread? The result is a dense, raisin-studded bread pudding drenched with sweet crème rum sauce made with Bacardi Silver. For only $5.50 a slice, you can enjoy this classic

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Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

dessert after a small roast beef po-boy and still come in under budget.

At Mother's Restaurant, another well-known spot for po-boys, they also offer a mouthwatering mound of bread pudding made with leftover Leidenheimer French bread, though this Warehouse District restaurant's recipe has a Depression-era twist. Since 1938, their bread pudding has included the addition of fruit cocktail, a sure-fire sweetener at just the right price. It comes out to only $6.75 for a brick-sized slab of bread pudding drenched in a buttery E&J Brandy sauce. If it's not broke, don't fix it!

In the historic French Quarter, you could be blindfolded and throw a string of purple beads in any direction and nearly hit a restaurant that serves a boozy bread pudding. For instance, on the first block of Bourbon Street, the appropriately named Bourbon House by Dickie Brennan offers a sticky pecan bread pudding, a dark $8 confection soaked in a Benchmark Bourbon butterscotch sauce and sprinkled with sugared pecans.

Only three blocks away at Antoine's, one of the country's oldest family-run restaurants, they offer an uber-traditional bread pudding (made with Leidenheimer, of course). For $9, diners can enjoy a thick slice dotted with raisins, topped with crunchy pecans, and draped in a butter rum sauce—the type of rum wholly dependent upon the chef's mood that day.

Just around the corner from Antoine’s, in their iconic pastel-pink building on Royal

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Street, the folks at Brennan's offer their bread pudding in bite-sized pieces swimming in a buttery, whiskey-laden hard sauce and served with a scoop of rum raisin ice cream. At $10, the bread pudding is a pricey endeavor, but you could still swing a café au lait to sip along with it.

Then, only a hop and a jump more will take you to Muriel's Jackson Square on the corner of St. Ann and Chartres Streets.

With a view of the glorious square, you can enjoy their signature white chocolate bread pudding bejeweled with candied pecans and draped in a Ron Pontalba rum sauce. While the restaurant is large enough to practice social distancing, you may get up-close and personal with longtime guests of a more spectral variety.

Head Uptown to the Pontchartrain Hotel on St. Charles Avenue for another take on the classic at Jack Rose. Whether you sit in their lush, greenhouse-like dining room or get it to go, you won't soon forget the “Banana Dulcey Bread Pudding.” Dulcey, in case you were wondering, is a type of Valrhona-brand white chocolate with a warm blond color and nutty flavor. Served with a banana curry ice cream and a Meyer's Original Dark Rum caramel sauce, this version of bread pudding is one you won't soon forget, especially since it will set you back $11 just to enjoy a bite!

Finally, though you'd think it would be more expensive, it's only $9.50 to delight in Commander's Palace's interpretation: their Creole Bread Pudding Soufflé. Dubbed “the Queen of Creole desserts,” this light, fluffy creation becomes an experience when your server finishes the soufflé table-side, breaking open the top by ladling large spoonfuls of their warm Buffalo Trace whiskey crème anglaise (a thick vanilla sauce or pouring custard) over the top.

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37

RESTAURANT GUIDE Crescent City Steakhouse has influenced New Orleans for over 87 years. Their steaks, including their rib eye and delectable bacon-wrapped filet mignon, are unmatched. The secret? For generations, the chefs have been cooking their steaks in sizzling butter. 1001 N. Broad St., 504-821-3271, crescentcitysteaks.com

Mikimoto creates a modern and tidy atmosphere with dim lighting and updated decor, a perfect setting for a meal of sushi, edamame, baked yellowtail neck, or whatever else you might be in the mood for. Their drive-thru allows you to grab some great sushi without even unbuckling a seatbelt.

3301 S. Carrollton Ave., 504-488-1881, mikimotosushi.com

Stumpy’s Hatchet House provides customers an unusual and fun experience: throwing a hatchet at a target! Both seasoned throwers and newbies are welcome. Stumpy’s features a selection of bar bites to snack on while hatchetthrowing, such as their delicious hot dogs and cheesy nachos.1200 Poydras St., 504-577-2937, stumpyshh.com/neworleansla

CAFÉS Bearcat Cafe focuses on serving high-quality dishes for breakfast and lunch, as well as sustainable coffees from Equator Coffee Co., loose-leaf teas, and house-made bottled beverages. They offer both light and indulgent dishes, with a “Good Cat” menu for when you’re going healthy and a “Bad Cat” menu for those splurge days. Multiple locations, bearcatcafe.com

Crescent City Steakhouse Lakeview Harbor boasts great steaks, seafood, and other classics, while providing a comfortable pub atmosphere on Lake Pontchartrain. They offer delicious steaks, such as a 10-ounce smoked prime rib with grilled asparagus and loaded potato croquettes, and a 12-ounce ribeye with grilled asparagus and rosemary roasted new potatoes. 8550 Pontchartrain Blvd., 504486-4887, lakeviewharbor.us Legacy Kitchen’s Craft Tavern serves refined American cuisine and spins on all of your favorite dishes. Their brunch menu is served daily to save you from having to wait for the weekend. Their All-American Beignet-Wich is a Southern take on the classic breakfast sandwich, with eggs, cheese, and bacon in a beignet.

700 Tchoupitoulas St., 504-613-2350, legacykitchen.com Sala is a family-owned restaurant that focuses on making their stylish atmosphere on the lake a place to be enjoyed with family and friends, especially since their food is meant to be shared.

Sala also features a fantastic cocktail menu as well as a Happy Hour Tuesday through Friday.

124 Lake Marina Ave., 504-513-2670, salanola.com

The Steakhouse at Harrah’s is an esteemed steakhouse that doesn’t skimp on the shrimp—try topping your steak with seafood to make it “surf and turf” style.

Want something exciting to drink with your meal? They offer cocktails by the bottle and champagne specials. And after tasting the food, you’ll understand why the Steakhouse’s chef, Ryan Wichter, has won awards. 1 Canal St., 504-533-6111, caesars.com/harrahsnew-orleans/restaurants/the-steakhouse

ASIAN Green Tea serves healthy Chinese cuisine and insists on being vegan-friendly and using local ingredients. They offer large portions of family meals, so your Chinese-food run can be enjoyed by the whole family. The restaurant also caters to fortune-cookie lovers by selling the iconic cookie in groups of four. 3001 Napoleon Ave., 504-899-8005, greenteanola.com

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MoPho merges Vietnamese and Louisiana cuisine together to create an experience that all should try. This restaurant features incredible appetizers, such as crispy chicken bites, as well as don’t-miss daily specials, including hot chicken vindaloo on Tuesdays and their smoky pork pho on Wednesdays. 514 City Park Ave., 504-482-6845, mophonola.com

BARS WITH GREAT FOOD 5216 Table & Tap is a great bar that has food just as good as its drinks. In addition to an impressive selection of amazing cocktails, they offer a variety of speciality burgers, such as the Southern Drawl, which is loaded up with a fried green tomato, pimento cheese, and bacon. 5216 Veterans Blvd., Metarie, 504-766-1417, 5216tableandtap.com Fulton Alley isn’t only a bar, but also a bowling alley, so you can spend the evening there drinking and scoring spares. Bowling is even more fun with an order of their Loaded Baked Potato Tots, which are oversized tater tots with cheddar cheese, bacon, and green onions. 600 Fulton St., 504-208-5569, fultonalley.com Orleans Grapevine has been serving high-quality cuisine and fine wine for many years. The building is over 200 years old, but their food is fresh and modern, especially the Grapevine Black Angus house filet, an eight-ounce filet that comes with your choice of crawfish demi-glaze or a cream sauce. 720 Orleans St., 504-523-1930, orleansgrapevine.com

Jimmy J’s Café makes everything from scratch with the freshest ingredients, and their staff prides themselves on knowing how to both cook and serve good food. This restaurant has a wide variety of delicious French toast options, such as their blueberry-brandy glazed, Bananas Foster, Cap’n Crunch, and cinnamon-spiced varieties. 115 Chartres St., 504-309-9360, jimmyjscafe.com Misa focuses on serving global cuisine with authentic Mediterranean influences, which goes wonderfully with their impressive wine list.

Customers can sit outside on the patio and enjoy excellent dishes such as their sweet potato ravioli and cauliflower curry. Their fantastic desserts include a perfect chocolate tart served with ice cream. 4734 Magazine St., 504-510-2791, misanola.com

CARIBBEAN Carmo built its menu upon a multi-cultural culinary experience that gives diners a taste of the Caribbean, West Africa, and beyond, for vegans and omnivores alike. Their delicious Rico entree features grilled plantains topped with panela cheese, house-smoked wild boar, and their Rico sauce. 527 Julia St., 504-875-4132, cafecarmo.com NOLA Caye is a Caribbean-style restaurant that not only has delicious food, but also a great atmosphere for you to enjoy their cuisine, both indoors and out. Their house salad, deliciously filled with mangoes, pineapples, and avocado, is just one of many recommended dishes, and their Happy Hour is top-notch. 898 Baronne St., 504-302-1302, nolacaye.com

ITALIAN Josephine Estelle marries Italian cuisine with Southern influences to create a menu of unmatched flavor and quality. They are open for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, giving you plenty of opportunities to stop by. Their Pork Milanese, served with radishes and a Meyer lemon aioli, is the star of the dinner menu. 600 Carondelet St., 504-930-3070, josephineestelle.com Mosca’s is a family-owned restaurant that has been in operation for over 60 years. Guests can enjoy delicious Italian specialties and signature dishes, such as Oysters Mosca. Mosca’s even shares their recipes for favorites such as Shrimp Mosca and Chicken a La Grande, so customers can try making them on their own. 4137 US-90 West, Westwego, 504-436-8950, moscasrestaurant.com Nor-Joe Imports doubles as both an Italian import grocery store and fantastic restaurant.

The restaurant offers a range of tasty options, such as the creamy carbonara pasta, served with fresh garlic bread and a side salad, and the “cheese wheel pasta,” made by putting hot pasta and sauce into a hollowed-out cheese bowl.

505 Frisco Ave., Metairie, 504-833-9240, facebook.com/norjoeimport Pascal’s Manale has been serving New Orleans since 1913, offering delicious and authentic Creole and Italian dishes. Famous for being the original creator of New Orleans-style BBQ shrimp, this restaurant also features multiple private rooms that are perfect for small gatherings with friends. 1838 Napoleon Ave., 504-895-4877, pascalsmanale.com Red Gravy has been listed in Open Table’s Top 100 Best Brunches in America and is celebrating its 10th anniversary. On the brunch menu, they feature delicious cannoli pancakes, which are thin pancakes with cannoli cream, pistachios, and chocolate.

You don’t want to miss this Italian twist on brunch. 4206 Magazine St., 504-561-8844, redgravycafe.com Tavolino is sometimes referred to as the “hidden gem of Algiers” and is best known for its incredible handmade pizzas and excellent wine. Their prosciutto brie pizza is topped with tomato sauce, mozzarella, prosciutto, brie, and arugula. End your visit with their deliciously creamy pistachio cheesecake. 141 Delaronde St., Algiers, 504-605-3365

Rivershack Tavern calls itself the most unusual bar in New Orleans, and with good reason. Known for its collection of both “bar legs” barstools and tacky ashtrays, the Rivershack Tavern also has one of the best beer selections in town. It offers fantastic dinner specials that include steaks, ribs, and even tacos. 3449 River Rd., Jefferson, 504-834-4938, rivershacktavern.com Rum and the Lash is tucked into Mick’s Irish Pub and offers great food to go with its beers.

Try a basket of their fries, which come plain, with cheese, loaded, or with curry sauce. Their everchanging list of weekend specials and rotating menu items include a pork sandwich and a pimento cheese and collard melt. 4801 Bienville St., 504-482-9113, rumandthelash.com

Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

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RESTAURANT GUIDE Venezia Restaurant has been creating authentic Italian handmade pizza in their original stone oven since 1957. Don’t miss their fantastic veal, seafood, chicken, and pasta dishes. Get your meal topped with shrimp and crawfish in a dill cream sauce, or make it a classic spaghetti-andmeatballs night. 134 N. Carrollton Ave., 504-488-7991, venezianeworleans.net

MIDDLE EASTERN Lebanon’s Café creates an exciting and colorful atmosphere and serves authentic Middle Eastern cuisine, so you’re sure to enjoy both the food and the location.

Lebanon’s was voted Best Middle Eastern Restaurant by the readers of Where Y’at Magazine. Be sure to try a few of their hummus varieties. 1500 S. Carrollton Ave., 504-862-6200, lebanonscafe.com

Orleans cuisine and an extensive list of beer, wine, and cocktails—just the way we like it! Café 615 also has great catering options for all your party needs. 615 Kepler St., Gretna, 504-365-1225, cafe615.com

Chef Ron’s Gumbo Stop offers a variety of Chef Ron Iafrate’s delicious gumbo dishes, such as Freckled Gumbo, with fried oysters on top, or Gumbo Monceaux, topped with a poached egg and potato salad. They also serve other classic New Orleans dishes, including crawfish étouffée, jambalaya, shrimp creole, and red beans and rice. 2309 N. Causeway Blvd., Metairie 504-835-2022, gumbostop.com

Tal’s Hummus offers a pledge of hospitality to its customers, promising to treat all guests like family. They serve Israeli-inspired food, including hummus, pita sandwiches, and kebabs, all using the freshest ingredients. Order their hummus alone or topped with anything from chicken to grilled veggies to falafel.

4800 Magazine St., 504-267-7357, ordertalsonline.com

MEXICAN

NEW ORLEANS CUISINE Apolline is in a renovated double-shotgun cottage that creates a homey and welcoming feeling for every customer who enters. Their dinner menu has mouthwatering dishes, such as the brown butter and pecan-roasted Gulf fish. But Apolline is also famous for its brunch, complete with bottomless mimosas and Bloody Marys!

4729 Magazine St., 504-894-8881, apollinerestaurant.com

Our Private Room - Fine Dining & Social Distancing At Its Best!

Café 615 was voted “Best Restaurant Westbank” by Where Y’at Magazine readers. This restaurant offers large portions of authentic New

Daisy Duke's The Creole Cookery features divine New Orleans cuisine and drinks. They offer a delicious list of appetizers, such as gator bites and Cajun calamari, as well as impressive entrees.

Both their food and Hurricane cocktails will make you fall in love with New Orleans all over again. 508 Toulouse St., 504-524-9631, neworleanscreolecookery.com Daisy Duke’s provides a truly Southern experience, serving Cajun-inspired cuisine and providing customers the classic Southern hospitality that New Orleans is known for. Their breakfast menu is available at all times, offering such dishes as an alligator omelet, Cajun omelet, and biscuits and gravy. Multiple locations, daisydukes.com

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701 S. Peters, Warehouse District

Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

Apolline

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Carreta’s has been serving authentic Mexican food since 1999 and aims to make customers feel at home in their restaurant. Although you can always get all the classics, such as burritos and margaritas, a new item on the appetizer menu is their avocado fries: breaded and fried avocado slices, served with their house chipotle sauce. Multiple locations, carretasgrillrestaurant.com

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WhereYat.com | February 2021

41

RESTAURANT GUIDE Jazzy Pete’s is a hip restaurant that serves traditional New Orleans dishes and great po-boys. Jazzy Pete’s signature item is the Jazzy Pete Poboy, which comes with grilled hot sausage, American cheese, fried shrimp, pickles, greens, and Jazzy sauce, in either a large 12-inch or half-sized 7-inch variety. 8201 Oak St., 504-766-0420, facebook.com/ jazzypetesnola

lovers as well. One of their most popular dishes is the jumbo overstuffed potato that comes with toppings of your choice. The restaurant can cater any event and has a banquet room for hosting special events. 6129 East St. Bernard Hwy., Violet, 504-682-9057, facebook.com/ Charlies-Restaurant-Catering

Mandina’s was founded as a grocery store in the late 1890s and was later turned into a restaurant in the 1930s. The restaurant features numerous fantastic daily specials every day. For instance, on Tuesday, you can choose from beef stew, corned beef and cabbage, and delicious stuffed chicken breast.

3800 Canal St., 504-482-9179, mandinasrestaurant.com Short Stop Poboys is a dedicated po-boy restaurant that offers 30 different types of delicious poboys in total, including roast beef, hot sausage link, Italian sausage, meatball, oyster, and soft-shell crab, among many others. Their sandwiches come in 6-inch, 9-inch, and king-size 14-inch options, and you can even get whole wheat poboy bread. 119 Transcontinental Dr., Metarie, 504-885-4572, shortstoppoboysno.com

Desire Oyster Bar

4729 Magazine St. New Orleans | (504) 894-8881

Desire Oyster Bar allows oysterlovers to watch as experts shuck oysters that are fresh from the Gulf.

Customers can’t get enough of this restaurant’s oyster options, whether they’re on the half shell, chargrilled, or between the bread in their famous “Peacemaker” fried oyster and shrimp po-boy. 300 Bourbon St., 504-553-2281, sonesta.com/us/ louisiana/new-orleans/royalsonesta-new-orleans/desireoyster-bar The Galley is a seafood restaurant with excellent dishes made with quality ingredients.

They’ve been serving their iconic soft-shell crab and catfish poboys at Jazz Fest since 1977.

House specials include blackened or grilled redfish, topped with shrimp and crabmeat and served with potatoes and veggies; and veal parmesan with angel hair pasta. 2535 Metairie Rd., Metairie, 504-832-0955, thegalleyseafood.net

Willie Mae’s is a classic Southern restaurant that is known for its world-class fried chicken, which was voted as “America’s Best.” They also won a James Beard Award in 2005. The most popular meal here includes three pieces of chicken with one of their excellent sides, such as green beans, macaroni and cheese, or fries. Multiple locations, williemaesnola.com

SEAFOOD Briquette is a contemporary restaurant with an open-kitchen layout in a converted molasses factory. Their fresh fish is the highlight of the menu, prepared over brick-like “briquettes” covered in fine oils. The Snapper Pontchartrain, served with hollandaise sauce and lump crab meat, is an otherworldly experience.

701 S. Peters St., 504-460-3886, briquette-nola.com Charlie’s Restaurant offers delicious Cajun Creole cuisine, such as seafood-based salads and sandwiches, with plenty of options for non-fish-

42

Mardi Gras Manual | Where Y'at Magazine

Seaworthy is a seafood spot hidden in a Creole cottage. This restaurant devotes itself to serving “wild-caught and sustainably harvested oysters from American waters,” including the Gulf, so you know their food is fresh. Their “Chilled & Cured” special features mahi mahi, Gulf shrimp, fresh cobia, and poke-style tuna. 630 Carondelet St., 504-930-3071, seaworthynola.com Tito’s Ceviche & Pisco has a vibrant atmosphere, with upbeat music, art scattered throughout the restaurant, and an energetic and knowledgeable staff. They offer a fantastic dish known as Pescado a lo Macho, which includes pan-seared fish, mixed seafood, and a spicy Peruvian cream sauce, served over rice. 5015 Magazine St., 504-267-7612, titoscevichepisco.com

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43

TALES FROM THE QUARTER

By Debbie Lindsey

Cats Rule

C

ats most certainly communicate with one another. And I don’t just mean the usual back-and-forth exchanges of: “Hey, lookin’ good, wanna mate?”

“Hell, no. I’m spayed, and you ain’t all that, anyway!”

Or, “Move over; this is my chair.”

“Well, Miss Territorial, remember that when you eat out of my bowl!”

And, “Hey, wanna cuddle?”

“Sure, if ya got some catnip.”

Yes, we observe cat chat daily, but I’m referring to more serious plotting and planning—sharing of real information, even organized retribution.

I already knew there was more to their communication skills than the basic “meow.”

I’ve even overheard our house cats talk amongst themselves, but I have also found that they get the word out to the street cats. And the “word”—the message—is clear: Always keep the upper hand, and never let a person get away with thinking that they have control. Cats seem to have rules for each other that they agree to, or else they are shunned by fellow cats and thought to be a “sell-out to the man.” Cats will come together to confound and confuse their people, bending them to their needs and ways. We know that to receive the love and affection we so desire from our feline friends, we must conform to their wishes.

At the top of the feline’s agenda is to subjugate the person attempting to place topical flea drops upon the nape of the cat’s neck. This really pisses a cat off. But for those felines new to this well-intentioned act of health care, it might be time to realize that rebellion is needed here.

Obviously, the more experienced cats have a come-to-Jesus talk with newbies and instruct them on how a dignified cat should act. I mean, come on, why else would the outside community/feral cat accept—without hesitation—the topical flea drop application the first time, and even again a month later, only to suddenly go ballistic the third time I even approach with the little tube of drops? I mean, you’d think that I was putting battery acid on them—heck, I put it on my skin and felt no pain, no burn. Well, the answer is obvious: My indoor cats can talk through the screen door to any cat that passes by.

And if the outside, often homeless cat were to continue to be complacent and amenable to such dominance, then the person might want to adopt it and bring it indoors, thus usurping the indoor cat’s cushy position in the household hierarchy.

But how did they get the word to Lefty back when she came to be our shop cat?

The shop was a mile away from our cats’ screen door (the gossip and insurrection portal). A couple of years ago, Lefty came in to apply for the position of shop cat and was hired. A monthly application of flea prevention was applied, and she accepted without complaint for a while, and then,

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bingo! She began the “no way!” just like our house cats do. I guess they somehow contacted her and schooled her on required cat responses, thus leaving me to monitor the outgoing phone calls from then on.

My cats have also perfected the art of inappropriate urination. This is meant to baffle, worry, and drain me of money.

Because first, you must rule out the cry for help—meaning a cat might be telling you that the puddle of piss on your bed is due to a medical issue. So, of course, you rush it to the vet and, in the case of my little darlings, half the time it’s a legit health issue in need of attention, but the other times, it is just to put me into debt. Same goes for vomiting. Is it an obstruction in dire need of removal, or furballs (normal)? I play detective and try to determine who might have thrown up, but this is where our cats have taken a vow of silence, a loyalty oath. Is this a point of honor, or just part of the plot to break me and bend me to their will?

I already knew about certain cat traits that are universal, but let’s start with dining habits and, specifically, my cats’ gastronomic idiosyncrasies. There is that feline finicky flair they perfect and often personalize. Sure, dogs have certain likes and dislikes, but, basically, it’s a four-step procedure: Get a bowl, plop in food, place on floor, and watch it disappear. The whole experience is quick and always appreciated, and the affirmation of loyal love is there from start to finish. Well, not so much the case with my beloved cats. Serving multiple cats requires very strategic multitasking skills. There is always that one cat (Opie) who is gluttonous. Not at all picky, he will eat anything and quickly, and therefore, my expensive-prescription-cat food-only diners (Zack and Frankie) must be fed behind closed doors. And these prima donnas then must be kept from the dog’s food or Lefty’s (no longer a shop cat, now part of the neurotic house herd), as they are allowed regular food that smells stanky, delicious, and inviting.

The outdoor cats have their own idiosyncrasies that involve my varying techniques to insure that they eat their meals. Some (the social diners) require that I sit with them until they finish eating.

Others (the snooty customers) turn their back to eat, while still others act like they are in witness protection, can’t abide me even looking at them, and request that the food be hidden under the house.

And, of course, I, their personal crossing guard, must make sure that they are all safely escorted across any streets that might interfere with their preferred eating stations. As any cat person knows, there are too many words and far too many tales about our mysterious felines. But the bottom line is this: We love them unconditionally. And we live to serve!

PO-BOY VIEWS

By Phil LaMancusa

Valentine’s Truth or Consequences

"P

eter, Peter, pumpkin eater, had a wife but couldn’t keep her. Put her in a pumpkin shell, and … she left him for Abe the green grocer.” Pete didn’t know what to make of it; he was completely surprised. Happy Valentine’s Day. I knew a man once who drank after work well into the night while his woman slept, so that she could get up early to exercise. I knew a woman who couldn’t grasp the meaning of fidelity and couldn’t understand why that bothered her fiancé. I know a headstrong man and a loving woman who would follow his ignus fatuus adventures with stars in her eyes until he exhausted her. I knew an intelligent woman who dumped her lover because he couldn’t read a sentence without moving his lips with the words. I knew a good-hearted woman in love with a good-timing man. I knew a lot of relationships that just did not work out because sometimes people are attracted to alternatives and because someone sees that what was enjoyable in the beginning of a relationship can get old, and that there’s more to life.

Someone once told me that in a relationship of any kind, “First comes love, then comes work, and then love comes back.” I have to admit that it took me a long time to stick around for that “work” part. Ask any of my ex-wives. I’ve gone through most of my life headlong, leaving collateral damage in my wake, until I gave up fighting myself. That may not make any sense to anyone but me, but finally, I started paying attention.

Love goes away if you don’t pay attention to it; same goes for romance—both unique in their own ways and, at many times, at odds with each other. Research (mine) shows that while love (at times spelled with a capital L) can be viewed from an objective viewpoint, romance (also sometimes R) is very, very subjective. What they have most in common is that when you have one, the other, or both, if you don’t pay attention, nurture, and foster their growth, they will simply go away. Romance is first to jump ship. Love will stick around for a while and then get bored, distracted, and head in another direction. You know this to be true; you just didn’t think about it this way. And by the way, Valentine’s Day is not a quick fix.

Romance is spurred by impulse, e.g. beauty, lust, sight, sound, taste, i.e. “He/she

was humming that tune I love so much while cooking Pasta Arriabiata and dancing around the kitchen in that sexy way, and I could have just…” You get the picture.

Love is when you wake up in crumpled sheets (hopefully, not alone) with red sauce stains on the pillow, while still humming that tune.

Now, about that paying attention stuff. A cavity in that rear molar, that leaky pipe under the bathroom sink, and that little screek! screek! sound you hear when you apply the brakes will probably not be going away until you do something about them.

Conversely, the unfed cat, the untended rose bush, and that wallet you left on the counter at the 7-Eleven will, sure as shooting, not last long. It’s as simple as that. Live and learn or live and don’t learn.

What do you do? What you do is what you should be doing, not only on Valentine’s Day with flowers, dinner, and some heavy petting, but what you should be doing all year: paying attention. Pay attention to what you love and, certainly, feed, tend, and celebrate what you romance. Read the signs and follow the breadcrumbs. The relationship you save, if it’s worth it to you, may be your own.

Paying attention means that you realize that people grow, and if you don’t grow together, you can surely grow apart.

Little things and big things keep romance alive. Taking care of yourself is the biggest. If you want to keep attracting, you have to be attractive. Next, if you can name counterproductive attributes that you have (be honest with yourself) and get rid of them, generally, that’s another plus. Be ready to admit your weaknesses and your faults. It’s all right to be wrong, and saying that you’re sorry only matters if you are ready to change your ways.

Why am I on this rant? Because Valentine’s Day has special meaning to me, and at this point, I can look back on my life and count my flaws like railroad ties. Lately, I don’t count on nothin’. There are so many variables in relationships that, with one slip, it’s down that slope.

I have a theory that each relationship will attempt to teach you something, and if you don’t learn, it’s on to the next one, until you either learn how not to be such a ___ ___ (fill in the blanks), or you’ll keep missing the point and die lonely and alone.

Now, if you don’t mind being alone, being your own best friend, and getting in touch with yourself on those cold and lonely nights, have at it. Most of us miserables like a little company.

That’s my story, and I’m stickin’ to it. Now, go out and make reservations at a romantic spot, buy expensive flowers, or maybe some trinket or other—a card would be nice that says “Roses are red…” or some such rot. I’m satisfied that I’ll only get what I deserve.

My Valentine’s present will be when she says to me, “You know, Honey, we don’t need those things. It’s Valentine’s Day every day for us.” Happy Valentine’s Day, y’all!.

WhereYat.com | February 2021

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