Campus Talk November 2013

www.mycampus talk .com NOVEMBER 2013

CAMPUS TALK IS A COLLEGE STUDENT’S BEST FRIEND

Love’ ‘Tough ’s 1 VH ith A Chat w r Kyle Keller t S a

Getting to Know

‘Twerk Fail Girl’ The YouTube Sensation

Staying Down

to Earth

The Turducken

Tradition

and Other Eatery Extremisms

Going Solo on Thanksgiving

with ‘Ender’s Game’ Actor Aramis Knight

A Holiday Survival Guide

for a Thanksgiving Back Home

Gadgets • Movies • Celebs • Nightlife • Jokes • Tons of funny stuff 1 Totally useless fact: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

campus talk

october 2006

fall spaces

GOING FAST

1 & 2 BEDROOM FLOOR PLANS AVAILABLE

Walk to UF & Downtown. Upgraded amenities. Private bedrooms & bathrooms. Washer & dryer included.

2 N D AV E C E N T R E . C O M 505 S. W. 2nd Ave | 352.372.3790 amenities subject to change

What’s In Your Salad?TM

GRAB YOUR COPY NOW. HERE’S A FEW TO START YOU OFF! EXPR ESS YOUR SELF

806 W UNIVERSITY AVE 352.376.4090 BODYTECHTATTOO.COM

CLEAN PROFESSIONAL TRUSTED SINCE 1998

4113 NW 16th Blvd Next to Publix (352) 384-9110

For all your aquarium needs.

2100 SW 34th St. (352) 336-6303

Aquatropics

GATORBUCKS.COM

BONO’S Pit BBQ (352) 331-3112 6760 W Newberry Rd Gainesville FL 32605 /bonosgainesville

GUARAN

4113 NW 16th Blvd Next to Publix (352) 384-9110

CUSTOM TATTOOS, BODY AND DERMAL PIERCINGS, ONE OF A KIND ARTIST DESIGNED T-SHIRTS, ORGANIC PLUGS & JEWELRY, BODY JEWELRY, GIFT CERTIFICATES

www.gatorbucks.com

gatorbucks.com

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

WITH COUPON. NOT VALID WITH OTHER COUPONS OR SPECIALS.

Pork Sandwich, 1 Side & A Drink

$5.99 SANDWICH COMBO

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

WE CARRY A LARGE SELECTION OF WOOD, BONE & HORN PLUGS & JEWELRY

10

%

OFF ALL RETAIL

8&45 6/*7&34*5: "7&/6& t t #0%:5&$)5"5500 $0.

C L E A N - P R O F E S S I O N A L - T R U S T E D S I N C E 19 9 8

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

DIRECT TRADE COFFEE, FRESH PASTRIES AND WRAPS COFFEE ROASTED ON SITE COUPON GOOD UP TO $5.00

FREE

www.gatorbucks.com

For all your aquarium needs.

2100 SW 34th St. (352) 336-6303

FF

NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFER. EXPIRES 01/15/14.

BUY ONE GET ONE

www.gatorbucks.com

FF

SALT WATER FISH

10%

20% FRESH WATER FISH

Aquatropics

FULL SIZE LETTER GATORSKIN PATTERN

Proud Pizza Partner of the Florida Gators

GatorDominos.com

YOU CAN FIND MORE LIKE THESE IN GATOR BUCKS TO SAVE YOTUE$E$D !

www.gatorbucks.com

www.DTBarbershop.com

EXPIRES 01/15/14

PIZZA +BITES

LARGE 1-TOPPING PIZZA +16PC. PARM BREAD BITES

Code BITES

Hand-Tossed Crust, Thin Crust or Brooklyn Crust

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

$8.99

'3&&

REGULAR PRICE.

$2OFF

Hair Cut & Hot Lathered Neck Shave

7 5NIVERSITY !VE s 'AINESVILLE &,

s (OURS -n& s AMn PM

www.gatorbucks.com

GatorDominos.com

$1

OFF

WITH MINIMUM PURCHASE OF $7.99

WWW.DESIGNERGREENS.NET COUPON NOT VALID ON DAY OF HOME FOOTBALL GAMES www.gatorbucks.com ONE COUPON PER CUSTOMER. NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER COUPON OR OFFER. EXPIRES: 1/15/14

CVZ B XIPQQFSˆ DPNCP NFBM HFU B XIPQQFSˆ TBOEXJDI

EXPIRES: 01/15/14. REDEEMABLE IN GAINESVILLE ONLY. ONE COUPON PER PERSON

14209 W. Newberry Rd.

PIZZA

BY THE SLICE

FREE

SLICE OF CHEESE PIZZA

W/ PURCHASE OF ANY SLICE OF PIZZA AND A LARGE DRINK

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

(NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER COUPON, OFFER, OR DISCOUNT. NOT VALID ON HOME FOOTBALL GAME DAYS. ONE PER PERSON.)

www.gatorbucks.com

www.gatorbucks.com

EXPIRES: 08/15/13

PIZZA

BY THE SLICE

1728A W. University Ave. (Next to Gator City) (352) 367-4600

DINE IN ONLY. NOT VALID W/OTHER COUPON OR SPECIAL OFFERS OR ON COMBOS. LIMIT ONE PER PERSON.

W/ PURCHASE OF TWO 22OZ FOUNTAIN DRINKS

FREE

1728A W. University Ave. (Next to Gator City) (352) 367-4600

1670 W. University Blvd., Unit 3 (352) 271-7977 1310C N.W. 23rd Ave (13th Street) (352) 375-6610

(352) 672-6404

(352) 331-1BBQ

2327 NW 13th St (Albertson’s Plaza) 352-376-6224 5156 SW 34th St (Shoppes of Williston) 352-371-5851 www.hogans83.com

SINCE 1983

Across frum Publix

.com

Come In. Live Well.

SINCE 1983

BUY ONE GET ONE

2327 NW 13th St (Albertson’s Plaza) 352-376-6224 5156 SW 34th St (Shoppes of Williston) 352-371-5851

www.hogans83.com

Not valid with Gold Card or any other offer. Expires 01/15/14

'.# s

30% OFF price of Gold Card

Not valid with Gold Card or any other offer. Expires 01/15/14

'.# s

26% OFF Entire purchase

Only at Butler plaza GNC. Expires 01/15/14

'.# s

FREE C-4 ENERGY DRINK

6'' SUBS ON SUNDAYS

Archer Rd

SUNDAYS ONLY. LIMIT ONE COUPON PER PERSON PER DAY. NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER COUPON, DISCOUNT, OR OFFER, INCLUDING THE DAILY SPECIAL. EXPIRES 1/15/14.

www.gatorbucks.com

Butler Plaza (By Target) 3914 SW Archer Rd. Gainesville, Fl 32608 352-377-6020

Vitamins, Diet, Herbs, Sports Nutrition www.gatorbucks.com

I-75

JONESVILLE

SUNDAY BUCK $$$ SUNDAY BUCK $$$ SUNDAY BUCK $$$ SUNDAY BUCK

next to Hungry Howies

BUY ONE GET ONE

Limited Time Offer.

www.bubbaquesbbq.com EXPIRES: 01/15/14

FEATURE GAINESVILLE

Pullled Pulled d Pork Pork, k 2 SSides ides & Bubba Bread 4928 N.W. 39th Ave.

PULLED PORK DINNER

Fall

www.gatorbucks.com

www.gatorbucks.com

OFF

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

NEXT SCHEDULED SERVICE APPOINTMENT

UPQQJOH QJ[[B LG 7

³ -BSHF

EXPIRES: 01/15/14 ONLINE CODE: LG7

$50

www.gatorbucks.com

www.gatorbucks.com

ONLINE AT WWW.GATORFIVESTAR.COM

EXPIRES: 1/15/14

BREAKIN’ IT DOWN!

CONTENTS

GOOD

P14

READING

09 Foodception: A Review 10 Thanksgiving for the

Lonely Dummy 12 Holiday Survival Guide 14 Aramis Knight 16 Creative Ways to Switch Up Your Thanksgiving P23 Meal with Friends 17 The Post-Gobble Waddle 19 Angeles Burke 23 Attention: Size Matters 30 Find Out Who’s Crushing on You!

6

campus talk

|

november 2013

P34

P19

P10

P30

P17

48 Kyle Keller 58 Thinking Out Loud While

in Exile in Spain 81 Top 10 Reasons to Get Tested for HIV 82 Jeremy Hyman 84 The Stuntwoman Behind “Twerk Fail Girl”

CLUB PICS

71–78 Club pics are brought to you by mycampustalk.com

Totally useless fact: Because of the rotation of the earth, an object can be thrown farther if it is thrown west.

breakin’ it down!

FOR YOUR

P48

ENTERTAINMENT 22 Ways to Confuse Your

Roommate P52 24 For Life’s ‘ Duh’ Moments 31 Guess What Happens Next!

33 The Art of Rejection 34 Cinema Escape: Movie Ticket Giveaway 41 Myths and Legends: Spot the Not 52 Sushi Etiquette 54 Unfortunate Cookies 59 What to Do When the Internet is Down P58 64 Spot the Differences 66 Sore Thumbs 68 Tune In. Turn On. Plug In. 70 Alcohol Troubleshooting 85 Flicks 90 Man Test 92 Gadgets P66

P56

P16

P68

P92

Totally useless fact: A pig’s orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

campus talk

|

november 2013

7

WHAT’S on!

Editors ‘

LETTER Although the leaves may not change and the temperature barely drops, it’s that time of year again: when football hopes and dreams have either faded, soared or been reduced to wishes of luck and crossed-fingers, turkey and mashed potatoes are served in some fashion everywhere you go, and families regretfully come together to celebrate a day that our snooty ancestors invaded a foreign land and gave a bunch of indigenous people diseases.

Yep, it’s Thanksgiving!

In lieu of the holiday, we here at CT have packed on a little extra meat for your ocular pleasure. This month we sat down with “Tough Love” star Kyle Keller, the stuntwoman from Jimmy Kimmel’s hoax “Twerk Fail Girl” video and Aramis Knight from the Sci-Fi adventure,

“Ender’s Game.” Find out ways to survive Thanksgiving with the family with CT’s Holiday Survival Guide. Should you be lucky enough to spend Thanksgiving alone, we’ve also thrown in some ideas for your solo celebration.

On a more serious note, be sure to read up on the reasons to get tested for HIV while at college. With the semester almost wrapped up, what better time to read up on some secrets to college success from Jeremy Hyman.

So, this year as your family almost burns the house down trying to deep fry that turkey, remember that at least you have final exams to come back to and CT to get you through them.

Daniel Sutphin

Editor-IN-CHIEF Lauren Douglass

CONTENT EDITOR Daniel Sutphin

art director DANIEL TIDBURY

Graphic Design Jane Dominguez Patrice Kelly Daniel Tidbury

Contributing Writers Marc Douglass Lauren Douglass Daniel Sutphin Kelly Herman Brian Hodges John Scheck Mike Stanley Kevin Pearson Sarah G. Mason Mike Capshaw

FASHIon FEATURES Danielle Boudrea

SPeCIAL PROJECTS

If you have any comments you’d like to share with CT, send them in to mail@mycampustalk.com and you’ll be entered into a drawing to win prizes!!

You may only be entered once, so don’t send us 50 comments thinking you’ll enhance your chances of winning! Employees of Campus Talk magazine, their relatives, their twins from alternate universes and their healthcare providers are prohibited from entering this drawing. Everyone else is eligible to participate… except for pandas. No pandas allowed.

Lauren Michelle Kolansky Sasha Lall

nightlife Paparazzi Jason Frankenfield

Promotions Amanda Liles Karen Jones AnnMarie DeFeo Georgia Summerville

director of advertising Shane Howell shane@whpinc.com

Legal Counsel Gary Edinger

distributed by street teams, inc.

president of operations MARC DOUGLASS

Campus talk is licensed for publishing rights in florida to whp, inc. other markets are available. for information on owning campus talk in another city, please contact us. phone :

(352) 371.5881

email :

mail@mycampustalk.com

THE WHAT’S HAPPENING NETWORK

snail mail :

P.O. Box 143053 Gainesville, Fl 32614

visit online :

mycampustalk.com

This magazine is rated EFH for Extremely Freakin’ Hilarious. EFH [WHP - A diversified marketing & publishing organization] Let us help you reach thousands with outdoor advertising on The What’s Happening Truck

8

campus talk

|

Full service design studio providing clients with our best creative talents.

november 2013

Publishing division creating the best in college publications to college students.

Connecting students to student properties clear across the country. Traffic is our middle name.

From pens to ping pong tables, our promotional department can handle all of your logo merchandising needs.

Campus Talk is a humor magazine dedicated to relieving students of the pressures of everyday college life. Among essay exams, crowded classrooms, boring professors and messy roommates, Campus Talk offers a welcome diversion for those students “just trying to get away from it all.”

Different viewpoints may grace our pages but may not all represent the opinions of Campus Talk Magazine or its staff. Campus Talk should not be read by anyone suffering from heart ailments, unfunny syndrome or halitosis. All images depicted are purely coincidental.

Copyright 2009. All rights reserved, What’s Happening Publications, Inc.

Totally useless fact: ‘Stewardesses’ is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand.

GOING OVERBOARD

by Kelly Herman

Foodception

A Review For a friend’s birthday, I baked him brownies with Oreos and peanut butter, his two favorite things.

Genius! I couldn’t have been more happy with my food inside food with some extra food stuffs added in. Excited to see if there were other great food combinations I could experiment with, I Googled for some stuffed food recipes. Much to my horror, I stumbled upon a few I wish I could unsee.

Turducken Obviously we have to cover this one. With turkey day coming up, there will be no shortage of weird Uncle Jeb’s trying to serve this when it’s their turn to host Thanksgiving, bless their misguided hearts. Turkey is great. Chicken is great.

Duck is (arguably) great.

But have you seen what one of these Frankenstein’s monsters looks like split open? It’s like a creepy vortex of amputees, with stuffing injected into the crevices. No thank you, Uncle Jeb, I will just take the green bean Jell-o.

Nacho Lasagna As if nachos weren’t convenient enough, they had to go and make this scrumptious catastrophe.

The best part about nachos is the dipping and getting all the ingredients you want. Your friend wanted black olives but you’ll be damned if one of those Barbie tires makes it onto your perfectly sculpted chip. Now, those uggos are everywhere and instead of just veering around them, you’ve got to dig through the most perfect of all foodceptions to remove undesirables. Plus, nachos take all of 15 minutes max, and that’s mostly in preheating the oven.

Why are you gonna wait an hour and a half for nachos? Unacceptable.

Pies inside of Cakes DIABETES! Seriously, why can’t we just be satisfied eating one fudgy treat at a time? Mixing cookies and brownies is one thing, because they’re both in the same texture category. But mixing a pie and a cake? It’s like putting a water balloon inside a couch cushion, because hey, waterbeds are pretty neat, right? And then there’s the Cherpumple, which is three layers of pie stuffed inside cakes.

They should’ve named it the Chernobyl, since that’s what it’ll feel like coming out the other end.

us horrendo Seen any s you just ion foodcept wrap your e it can’t qu sta d (like pa to n u o r a d a he ture Post a pic burritos)? ok page, with o our Faceb eption” in “Foodc iption. the descr

Mac and Cheese Meatloaf Balls Whoever decided to desecrate the sanctity of mac and cheese by stuffing its poor, delicate form into a ball of meat slathered in ketchup should be severely punished. Mac and cheese is an art! A tradition! A lifestyle! You can’t just throw mac and cheese around all willy nilly, thinking meat is going to make its infinitely superior taste any better. These people are animals, I tell you.

Totally useless fact: Billiards great Henry Lewis once sank 46 balls in a row....using his nose as his cue stick.

Sushi Cake Quick, let’s think of the best way to leave raw fish out for several hours! I know! We can layer rice and avocado and tuna in one large portion, that’ll take AT LEAST the amount of time necessary to make the tuna warm, and then cut slices out of it like a normal cake! And use forks to dig in, just like a normal cake!! Is nothing sacred anymore? Has America defiled so few of its own incredible dishes that it must look to others’ creations for molestation?

Unforgivable. campus talk

|

november 2013

9

TABLE FOR ONE

ley

By Mike Stan

for ing v Thanksgi

onely L e h T

Dummy

Traditionally regarded as a family holiday, the first documented Thanksgiving was in 1621 between the recently arrived Pilgrims, and the Wampanoag Indians; however, it hardly resembled Thanksgiving as we know it today.

Thanksgiving together. If your neighbors are scary and more or less unwelcoming, make sure your doors are locked, and commence your exploration of options.

phone call, FaceTime or at least a text message thanking them for their efforts. Let’s face it, you were probably a pain in the ass to raise.

Friends of Similar Disposition Do you do anything with any type of club or fraternity? I’m sure one of the members in this group wouldn’t mind having a Thanksgiving Day guest. It could be the beginning of a lasting friendship, you just have to have the courage to ask.

The yearly celebration began in 1863 when Lincoln declared it a national holiday. At the time, it was celebrated yearly on the last Thursday of November. In 1939, Franklin Roosevelt declared the celebration to be held on the fourth Thursday in November.

Ever since then, Americans have molded the tradition into what we know it as today: A day where the now-traditional horde of poultry and starchy goods grace dinner tables, parades fill city streets and football lights up gigantic television screens throughout the country.

But history be damned; cue reality: You’re stuck away from home with family miles away.

Yes, this marks your first Thanksgiving as a truly independent individual, but now what? First off, just be thankful you made it out of the womb and that you were lucky enough to have made it to this point in your life, and in mostly one piece, hopefully. Your parent(s) spent a long time raising you to be the person you are today, so the first order of business should be a

10

campus talk

|

november 2013

With your thanks given, turn your focus to your plans for the holiday. Can you cook? Do you like cooking? Do you like doing any physical activities? Do you do said physical activities in groups? Are those people in said groups all out of town? Do you work? Do you have to go in to work!? Getting the picture yet?

Employment Figure out if you have to work or not. If you do, fully immerse yourself in your duties to distract you from the gaping void that once spilled over with festivities of food, family and, for some, relaxation.

Bonding Time with Neighbors If you don’t have to work, explore your options. If you live in a dorm or an apartment and you’ve met some of the neighbors, chances are that somebody is staying in town and bears a similar dilemma. If they’re nice and are inviting, then there is a good chance that the two of you could share your first solo

Local Eateries Not into strangers? Call around to your local restaurants and see if anybody is serving a Thanksgiving Day dinner. Reserve a seat for one, and stare down the people staring at you while you inevitably lick your plate clean, never breaking eye contact.

A Last-Ditch Effort If all else fails and you hate cooking, just go to the nearest grocer and purchase a microwavable pack of pre-made mac and cheese, a can of green beans, and a ready-to-eat roasted chicken.

The chicken will already be hot, so microwave the mac and green beans, throw it all on a plate and chow down. Should this stand as your best option, it will be beneficial to know that tears make a great salty addition to your green beans.

Totally useless fact: You can’t plow a cotton field with an elephant in North Carolina.

oooh, nasty!

irty? d e r a s e t a roomm photos. r u o y k in h T ut these ur

Check eoto send us picturees toof yo

Feel fre ment or roommat ’d love to nasty aparytca mpustalk.com, wlde for you. mail@m em off to the wor show th

Need a new apartment or roommate, go to www.collegerentals.com.

Totally useless fact: In Lehigh, Nebraska it’s against the law to sell donut holes.

campus talk

|

november 2013

11

not-so-happy holidays Sure, you’ve spent plenty of Thanksgivings at home in the past, but once you go to college, those warm, fuzzy holidays can often turn cold. Although the word fuzzy can still be applied, it’s usually applicable to only that of your memory of the experience.

thanksgiving survival kit

be prepared for family turmoil

Your new-found freedom rarely aligns with the curfews, structure and rules your parents had over you before you left for school.

As a result, you may find yourself in a flurry of arguments, yelling-matches and debates over lifestyle, eating habits, drinking habits, financial dilemmas and even, if you have yet to pick a major, the age-old question of, “What are you gonna do with your life?”

12

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Theaters in Glendale, California can show horror films only on Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday.

not-so-happy holidays To prepare you for such potential family turmoil, we’ve decided to put together a sort-of, “Survival Guide,” to help you make it through the break and come out on top of the holiday.

curfew

time keeper

chores

So long 2 a.m.’s and last calls; your nights of gallivanting about the city are going to be halted a great deal. Try to work out some bargaining terms with your parents. Whether it’s your first Thanksgiving back, or your 10th, many parents will often try to throw the “My house, my rules” schtick at you.

In their eyes, you’re still “their baby” so they will most likely treat you that way as well. Plus, there isn’t a more awkward experience than that of running into your parents on your way to bed, while they are just waking up for the day.

Pick your battles. They fed you and housed you for all those years, the least you can do is help out with chores around the house.

Also, completing these tasks usually works well for the previously mentioned bargaining terms.

f r ie n d ly

Psst ... Need help finding your conscience? Look left.

r e m in d e

r

Hanging with Friends

food saver

food This will probably be the best meal you will get all semester, so savor it. Don’t go crazy with the helpings though, you’ll want to have plenty of leftovers to take back to school with you. On a regular college diet, T-Day leftovers can easily last a week or so, which means money saved for going out at night.

If you’re of age, and you want to get snockered over the break, remember to maintain.

It’s pretty embarrassing to have your parents find you passed out on the couch the next morning with a half-empty beer in one hand and a video game controller in the other.

beer replacement

drinking

Psst... Drinking a soda isn’t that bad!

When attending college, most of us are happy to get away from the people with whom we went to high school. Be choosy and just hang with the people you actually care about, if any.

It’s your vacation, don’t waste it on people you don’t want to be around.

You’re already doing that with your family.

“What are you gonna do with your life?”

This one is easy, LIE! But be prepared by looking up some actual majors that could throw the inquisitors off. When asked, respond with answers like, “Oh, I’ve actually taken a big interest in hospitality and tourism management.” Or, “I’ve recently been pursuing the vast applications of Art Therapy.” There are many ways to dodge this bullet. Just remember to be creative and to do a little research before jumping into a bold-faced lie.

Psst... We made you a list of other strange or fake majors to tell your family.

Bowling Industry Management Winemaking Sports Ministry

Boilermaking Golf Course Management Bakery Science

Motorsports Science and Engineering Interdisciplenary Studies Packaging Science

Time with Family That is why you are there for the most part, or at least it’s the reason you’re visiting. Although family can be obnoxious at times, remember the benefits of going home for the break: A restock of food, a no-pay stay away from the daily grind of classes and work, and if you’re lucky, and you play your cards right, you might just leave with a decent amount of pocket money.

Social Dynamics Totally useless fact: During the Roman Empire, the Romans used lead as sweetening agent.

campus talk

|

november 2013

13

keeping “down to earth”

Interview by Sarah G. Mason

Not many 14 year olds can say they’ve been to space and battled aliens – Aramis Knight is the exception. In preparation for the much-anticipated premiere of “Ender’s Game,” Knight talks about his experience filming for the big screen, shares a few funny stories from the set and discusses his devotion to those who’ve been there for him.

14

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Mayflies live only one day as an adult. During that day they molt twice, mate, and lay eggs in water.

keeping “down to earth”

watch Aramis Knight in the “Ender’s Game” trailer

For someone who isn’t familiar with the Ender’s Game series, can you tell me a little about the plot? “Ender’s Game” is about kids called “prodigies” who are brought from Earth to an international space station and trained to be soldiers, both physically and mentally. Their goal is to outsmart this alien race. It’s cool to watch the perspective of all the characters develop as soldiers, since they’re really forced to grow up and become adults before it’s really natural.

Tell me a little about your character, Bean.

I can relate to Bean a lot. He’s kind of the underdog; he’s the one who bullies tend to pick on. He really has to prove his position quickly to gain respect from all of the different boys. All of the people in the film helped us so much on getting to know our characters better. I really feel like I was able to experience the feelings Bean had throughout the movie.

What did you do to prepare for this role?

We had trainers that helped us get into good shape for the movie. We were often on wires during filming to simulate zero-G’s, so we definitely had to be physically fit. We went through about a month of training in the beginning. They also sent us to Space Camp in Alabama for five days. I’m the youngest boy by a couple of years, so I definitely had to prove myself. I always had to be one step ahead of the others because I didn’t want to have that “little kid” title that I was given when we all first met.

Do you think Space Camp changed the dynamic between you and your cast members in any way? We were always good friends – none of us didn’t like each other when we first met – but Space Camp was where we became brothers. That’s when we started joking with each other and pranking each other. It’s really when we all bonded. One thing that makes this movie great apart from the special effects and the cast is just that you can see our friendships shine through in our characters. You can see the chemistry that we all have together.

What would you say was the biggest challenge you faced during filming?

The wires were extremely difficult in the beginning. It required so much core strength.

Also, because the movie is so visually stunning, it’s all computer effects. A lot of the time, we had to pretend we were looking at something when really we’re just staring at a big green screen. Then, while we were on the wires, not only did we have to look like we were in zero-G’s, but we had to act without a grimace on our face because our stomachs were hurting. It definitely required a lot of multitasking and focus.

Totally useless fact: Some dinosaurs were as small as hens.

Are there any funny stories from the set you can share? Oh, so many! [laughs] On set, I loved scaring people. I have an older sister, and when I was younger she always loved to scare me so I kind of got that trait from her. I made it my goal to scare everybody on set. I pretty much got everybody, even the background actors.

There were a couple of good scares in there.

This is the second movie you’ve done with Harrison Ford (the first was “Crossing Over”) – how was it working with him again? At first I was a little intimidated. I didn’t know how to approach him and say, “Hey! Do you remember me?” He’s such a great actor so I was a little scared seeing him again. When he saw me for the first time he said, “Aramis? Wow, you’ve gotten so big!” He remembered my name and everything, he’s such a cool guy and so down to earth.

“Ender’s Game “is premiering soon, what are you doing in preparation for its release? I’ve been doing a lot lately.

We just got all the premiere dates, so that’s going to be awesome. We also just went to Comicon which was just too much fun.

Mentally, because everyone’s been saying it’s going to be a big movie, I’ve been trying to prep myself for that. I’ve been trying to stay down to earth and to just remember where I came from and always remember the people who were there for me first. campus talk

|

november 2013

15

A Twist on Tradition

Creative

By Kristy Wyatt

ways to switch up your thanksgiving meal with friends

Want to host a Thanksgiving dinner with your friends this year, but don’t want the traditional meal?

Here are some ideas on how to switch things up a little…

First, let your friends know about • Roast beef or prime rib. your plans in advance. You don’t This is a popular idea for the want to have your guests expect meal, as prime rib and roast a roasted turkey and be surprised beef are considered celebratory with a Mexican feast instead. dishes. If you want to keep your Send out invites detailing your dinner on the traditional side, plans so no one will be in for a prepare all of your other foods surprise when they sit down the same: mashed potatoes, at the table. green bean casserole and your other favorites.

Replace that roasted turkey with another meat. The holiday will • Seafood dinner. There are still be the same even if you don’t also many people who opt for a make a huge, 13-pound stuffed seafood dinner. It’s a great and roasted turkey. Instead, try: change from the heavier • Baked ham. This is a popular traditional dinner, and you can turkey substitution at the choose from an array of dinner table. Serve it up with seafood to serve your family: the traditional sides or have it lobster, crab legs, salmon, alongside dishes like potato shrimp and more. salad, roasted squash, buttery corn and homemade rolls.

• Turducken. This oddlynamed Southern delicacy • Whole stuffed chicken. consists of a chicken that’s Try a stuffed chicken instead of stuffed into a duck that is turkey for a subtle change. stuffed into a turkey. It was first Switch up your sides to keep made famous by John Madden, the meal a bit non-traditional who presented a turducken to and opt for a new dessert, such the winning team of an NFL as a pumpkin cheesecake or game on Thanksgiving Day. pumpkin trifle.

16

campus talk

|

november 2013

Try out new sides. If you can’t bear to give up your turkey but you’d still like to try something new, here are a few great ideas for side substitutions:

Finally, try a new dessert.

Don’t make the same old pumpkin pie this year; try making a completely new dessert that your friends will love.

• R oasted acorn or butternut squash.

• Sautéed cabbage • Mashed cauliflower • Creamed onions • Broccoli casserole • S weet potato and apple casserole • Fried apples • Skillet corn • Yellow squash casserole • Stuffed zucchini

• • • • • • • • •

Pumpkin cheesecake Chocolate Pecan Pie Sweet Potato Pie Applesauce Cake Bread pudding Peanut Butter Pie Apple Crisp Peach Cobbler Gingerbread

Check out Yummly.com for these and other yummy recipes.

Totally useless fact: Crickets hear with their legs.

i’m stuffed!

e r a w e B tim to Don’t Fall Vic on eck the Turkey NDay Turkey

By Kevin Kage Pearson

THE POST-GOBBLE

WADDLE

Food and family fill the mind when it comes to Thanksgiving. To celebrate the holiday, most Americans host a variety of distant and estranged relatives, and for some reason, change dinner time to a sharp 2:30 p.m.

Highlights of this holiday tend to vary amongst its participants. While some may look forward to turkey, or probably more often dessert, my favorite part is when Uncle Silas has one too many whiskeys, deep fries a turkey and burns his eyebrows off.

Turkey, gravy, stuffing, casseroles, cranberry sauce, and the infamous pumpkin pie are common menu choices. The majority of annual weight gain occurs during the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day. The American Council on Exercise (ACE) concluded that 4,500 calories will be consumed by the average American on Thanksgiving Day. Based on my own experience, I believe it is a myth that someone can gain anything over five pounds during Thanksgiving week alone; however, it could definitely happen over the course of six weeks of holiday eating and leftovers. To help deter such weight gains, here are a few tips to consider when eating this Thanksgiving:

BEING PROACTIVE WITH FOOD CHOICES Eat as much turkey as possible! White meat like turkey breast contains virtually no carbs or fat. It is high in protein and has little calories when compared to every other food on the Thanksgiving menu. There are more calories in gravy than there is in turkey breast, so eat the white meat before you eat anything else. Filling up on the healthier and less caloric food will satisfy your hunger and discourage you from eating three plates of sweet potato casserole.

Don’t take home leftovers! The temptation will be strong at first, but fight it. Once dinner reaches your stomach and the food coma sets in, you will no longer feel so inclined.

It is okay to have A SLICE of Aunt Marge’s pumpkin pie. You don't want to insult your elders by not loving their creations, but don't go overboard and hog the whole damn pie.

Totally useless fact: By the age of 60, most people have lost 50% of their taste buds

THE REACTIVE SOLUTIONS Don’t care enough about eating healthy?

Luckily it’s the winter time and women can hide their cellulite with stockings and cankles* with cute winter boots, while men can stash their beer bellies with fake Jacksonville Jaguars Tebow jerseys!

Be reactive with exercise. The very next day is considered a government holiday and commonly known as “Black Friday.” Spending the day on foot carrying various bags of perfume for mom and socks for dad can burn calories. Just an hour of walking in the mall can burn between 150 and 200 calories. By the way, Pops is probably getting tired of socks, so maybe go with power tools this year.

The truth is that a person will not gain much weight by eating a lot on a single day. It’s ok to splurge on Thanksgiving as long as you ONLY do it on that day. It takes weeks of unhealthy eating habits to result in excessive weight gain, so eat clean before and after Thanksgiving to avoid being the center of fat jokes during finals.

Kevin Kage is a personal trainer and manager at F2 Arena & Darkside Athletics in Gainesville, Florida.

He writes fitness related articles for Campus Talk and SwoleScience.com. For more, see youtube.com/ KevinKageMMA and visit F2Arena.com.

*cankle –when the calf and ankle appears to be fused as one due to high amounts of adipose tissue campus talk

|

november 2013

17

COME FOR THE BIG APARTMENT

STAY FOR THE GREAT COMMUNITY A P P LY O N L I N E @ U N I V E R S I T Y C L U B A P T S . C O M

C LOS E TO CAMP U S �O N 3 B US RO UT ES + A M P L E PA R K IN G + S PAC IOU S F LOOR P LA N S + IN D IV ID UAL L EAS ES + F U L LY F U R N I S H E D

Ä…Ä‡Ä„ÄŒÄ…ÄŠÄ‚ÄŒÄ‹ÄŠÄ‹Ä‹ĹśÄ“ĹśÄ„Ä‹Ä‚Ä‚Ĺś ŜĄą Ĺś 18

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Contrary to belief, most black widow spiders don’t eat their mates.

fighting the “freshman 15”

A ngeles Interview by Lauren Douglass

Burke Celsius Director of Fitness and Wellness As college freshman start to gain their sea legs, they may notice themselves gaining something else, too – pounds. The “freshman 15” may be a student’s worst nightmare, but Celsius Director Angeles Burke is here to calm those fears. Burke shares some tips on how to stay fit and healthy during that first year of college.

Tell me about working out at home – does it work?

Working out at home is a great way to sneak in a workout if you’re short on time. I keep a set of light dumbbells, a long resistance band, ankle resistance bands and a stability ball in my house so that I can train at any time.The training will only work as hard as you do, so make sure that your intensity and duration mimic the duration and intensity that you would have if you were at a gym.

What about people who want to workout at home, but don’t want to give up their downtime?

If you watch a lot of TV, get active during the commercial breaks.

Rather than just sit around, start doing squats, jumping jacks, pushups or lunges to get your heart rate going. While it may seem like nothing or like you are not really getting in a workout, remember that every little bit counts and all of those moves will add up.

What is your favorite full-body dorm room exercise?

Burpees are my favorite full-body dorm exercise. Start standing, then place your hands on the ground and jump your feet back into a plank position. If you are up for the challenge, perform one push-up, then jump your feet back up to your hands and

stand back up. Last, jump as high as possible and reach up. That completes one repetition. Since you are getting up and down and reaching over your head, you will notice that your heart rate begins to climb. Burpees are a great cardiovascular and muscular strength exercise.

Why do so many freshmen gain the freshman 15?

I believe many freshmen gain the dreaded “freshman 15” because they are no longer in their parents’ house where there are structured meals. Students eat on the go and choose cheap foods, which tend to be high in calories, high in fat and high in carbs. When you add in late night partying and unhealthy food choices, the numbers on the scale will begin to creep up.

In addition, many students may have been active in extracurricular sports or competition teams during high school, but stop when they get to college. This means that their energy expenditure will be less than normal, and if they continue eating the same way that they had when they were active in sports, they will also begin to gain weight.

Another reason may be emotional eating. If a student has a history of using food as a source of comfort, it would be no

Totally useless fact: Lightening, not people, starts most forest fires.

surprise that they turn to food when they enter the brand new college environment without parents or friends. It’s important that these individuals watch their own behavior for patterns associated with stress and eating.

The more that this type of behavior happens, the more weight they student may begin to put on.

What advice do you have for students who have already gained the freshman 15 and can’t seem to lose it?

Don’t get discouraged! Rather than comfort yourself with more food, do something about it! Sit down and write out some of the reasons you may have gained weight during the past few months. Was it stress? Bad eating habits? Not being active enough?

Emotional eating? Figure out what the root cause for your weight gain might have been.

Once you can pinpoint the cause, make a change!

make time to work out is to organize your day. Have your gym clothes and a change of clothes packed with you so you don’t have to go back to the dorm before heading to the gym.

Cut down all the time spent on social media sites. Put down the electronics and go for a run around campus. Any activity is better than nothing. If you lack the motivation, think about what your goals are. If you feel too tired to go on that 3 mile run, then go for a walk instead. It is better than sitting on the couch with a bag of chips. That little walk will make you feel accomplished at the end of the day.

What’s the best way for a student to make that change?

Head out to the gym a few days a week. Keep healthier snack options in your dorm. No mindless eating. Write down an action plan that will help you to reach your goal of losing the weight you have gained.

Just talking about losing the weight will not do anything.

Write down the steps you are going to take and hold yourself accountable to take steps in the right direction. It will be tough at first, and it will take time, but remember that you didn’t gain the weight overnight; don’t expect to lose it overnight either.

Lots of students might feel like they just don’t have the time or motivation to workout – what advice do you have for these students?

My advice is: No excuses! You will make time for what matters to you the most. A few ways to campus talk

|

november 2013

19

MULTIPLE WAYS TO REACH NEW CUSTOMERS.

352-371-5881 SALES@WHPINC.COM 2

Flourish Magazine | Mar/2013

Quote here. Person Name

charted

things meat loaf would do for love

responses to that really long text ‘K’

legitimate response

anything that

what happens in the shower

Winning Fake Arguments cleaning body

Totally useless fact: A mosquito has 47 teeth.

when I watch TV To Actually watch shows

as background noise I surf the internet

campus talk

|

november 2013

21

uH?

Ways to Confuse Your Roommate you go to bed.

Put your glasses on before you wake up. If Take them off as soon as that they lain exp s, your roommate ask plain that Com s. sse Gla am Dre gic are Ma htmares. nig le rib ter you’ve been having Eat lots of “Lucky Charms.” Pick out all the yellow moons and stockpile them in the closet. If your roommate inquires, explain that visitors are coming, but you can’t say anything more, or you’ll have to face the consequences.

Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat. Then leave “Slim Jim” wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach every time your roommate walks in. If he/ she asks about the wrappers, say you know nothing about them.

Cover your bed with a tent.

Live inside it for a week. If your roommate asks, explain that “It’s a jungle out there.”

Get your roommate to bring you food and water.

Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you’re doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, “Soon, soon....”

Pile dirty dishes in your t you roommate’s bed. Insist tha re. the got y don’t know how the Draw a tiny, black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, “It’ s spreading, it’s spreading.”

Buy a McDonald’s “Happy Meal” for lunch every da y. straw and the na Eat the pkin. Throw everything else aw ay.

Hang up pictures of chickens all over the room. If your roommate eats eggs, yell at him/her and call him/her a cannibal.

campus talk

|

november 2013

Buy a Jack-In-The-Box. Every day, turn the handle until the clown pops out. Scream continuously for 20 minutes.

If your roommate comes home after midnight, hit him/her on the head with a rolling pin. Immediately go to bed, muttering, “Ungrateful little ...”

Set up meetings with your roommate’s faculty advisor.

Inquire about his/her academic potential. Take lots of notes, and then give your roommate a full report. Insist that he/she do the same.

Explain to your roommate that you’re going to be housing a prospective student in the near future. One day, bring in a pig. If your roommate protests, hug the pig and tell your roommate that he/she hurt its feelings. Watch T.V. with the pig, eating lots of bacon.

Keep a vacuum cleaner in the middle of the room. Look at it with fear for a few days. Then stay out of the room entirely, opening the door only a crack and whispering to your roommate, “Psst! Is it gone?”

Punch a hole in the T.V. Sit and watch it anyway, complaining about the poor picture quality.

Live in the hallway for a month. Afterwards, bring all of your stuff back into the room and tell your roommate, “Okay, your turn.”

t, glue ommate is ou While your ro e ceiling. When th your shoes to walks in, sit on the e at m om ro your moan. ur head, and floor, hold yo

Every time you wake up, start yelling, “Oh, my God! Where the hell am I?!” and run around the room for a few minutes. Then go back to bed. If your roommate asks, say you don’t know what he/she is talking about.

Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

22

Keep a tarantula in a jar for three days. Then get rid of the tarantu la.

If your roommate asks, say, “Oh, he’s around here somewhere.”

age important mess mate, “I’ve got an en you recover, Tell your room Wh etend to faint. for you.” Then pr mber what the message was. me re t Pretend to say you can’ ah, I remember!” eeks. ye h, “O y, sa , on Later ral w this up for seve faint again. Keep

Buy a plant. Sleep wit h it at night. Talk to it.

After a few weeks, sta to argue with it loudly rt . Then yell, “I can’t liv e in the same room wit you,” storm out of the h room and slam the do or. Get but keep the pot. Refuse to discuss the plant eve rid of the plant, r again.

Every time your roommate walks in, yell, “Hooray! You’re back!” as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, “Shouldn’t you be going somewhere?”

Set up tournaments Bowl inside the room. building. Award the in ple with other peo roommate wants r someone a trophy. If you he/she needs t tha n lai exp to bowl too, bowling shoes.

“Drink” a raw egg for breakfast every morning.

Explain that you are in training. Eat a dozen donuts every night.

eeks. Have ess for two w sit you. ln il s ou ri se and vi Feign a to your room a priest come l, leaving everything to il Write out a w One day, miraculously e. your roommat that your roommate st si In .” er “recov erything to ill, leaving ev write out a w he/she coughs, excitedly e you. Every tim you dying?” e say, “Oooh, ar Lock the door while your roommate is out. When he/she comes back and tries to unlock it, yell, “Don’t come in, I’m naked!” Keep this up for several hours.

When you finally let your roommate in, immediately take off all of your clothes, and ignore your roommate.

on fire. Apologize and Set your roommate’s bed ching too much “Beavis wat n bee ’ve you explain that him/her that you’re l Tel & Butthead.” Do it again. e, they deserved it. not sorry because this tim

Every time you see your roommate yell, “You son of a...” and kick him/her in the stomach. Then buy him/her some ice cream.

If your Break the window with a rock. you that lain exp s, test pro roommate ken were hot. Open and close the bro window as you normally would.

Totally useless fact: Historically, only Hawaiian men danced the Hula.

GET BIGGER! How Many Kids with Attention Deficit Disorder Does it Take to Screw in a Light Bulb?

Answer: Want to go ride bikes?

By John Scheck

Attention

Size Matters Studies have shown that our collective attention spans are being rapidly diminished by our use of the internet. At least that’s what I thought the article said but it was over three paragraphs long and who has that kind of time? I mean, do I look like I’m Amish? I have to check my email, Twitter, Facebook and Youtube accounts, as well as my phone messages. Oh, are you still here? I just clicked on a link to a story about a horrible earthquake. It sounded somewhere foreign so I stopped reading (and caring), then I remembered I was writing this. Glad we got that cleared up. Have a nice day.

Wait, I almost forgot something important.

I have something to sell. If your attention span has shrunk so much that you couldn’t get to the end of the instructions on your microwave popcorn and torched your RV, perhaps you should try our guaranteed Attention Span Extender. Guys, allow me to let you in on a little secret, women love men

who listen to them, which in your case is extremely difficult seeing how you’re trying to send a text message and watch the TV screen above her head while she’s talking. I know that you’re simply multi-tasking but she sees it a bit differently, namely that you’re an insensitive slob who couldn’t care less about her or her “feelings” (sorry, I don’t know what that means, either).

What she doesn’t seem to realize is that you have Attention Deficit Disorder. This is no joke; it’s a real disease, or ailment, or whatever. I mean, she wouldn’t give you a hard time if you were in an iron lung or in a coma, yet simply ignoring her will send her into a rage. Don’t worry, help is on the way.

After only a few very expensive and painful sessions with our patented Attention Span Extender,* you will be a new, more sensitive man, able to stay focused during your girlfriend’s entire story about what happened to her in line at Starbucks after yoga class.

Totally useless fact: Eskimos do use refrigerators, only they use them to keep their food from freezing.

You’ll even be able to recite the names of the 12 characters involved in the story, including what kind of coffee they ordered.

Not only will you be able to say “yes” when she asks if you’ve even been listening to her, you’ll be able to ace the test – and there’s always a test. Let me stop you right now before you ask, “But what’s in this for me?” The answer is sex, you idiot.

Listening is better than six-pack abs or a Porsche as far as most women are concerned.

With your new skills, you could even score with her annoying-as-hell friends.

Conversationally, men are like a quasi-literate version of SportsCenter mixed with random profanity, so the simple act of not talking raises our stock with women. *Side effects may include extreme boredom, tedium, nausea, fainting, severe depression, alcoholism, monotony, dullness, ennui, dreariness, despair, misery, gloominess, etc.

campus talk

|

november 2013

23

BRAIN FART RELIEF

By Daniel Sutphin

For Life’s

‘Duh’

Moments Quotes to Make You Feel Less Dumb We’ve all said stupid things in our lives. Most of us, however, have the benefit of such statements being forgotten or ignored, but not everyone can be so lucky.

For when life’s moments have you feeling a little inept, here are some quotes to relieve the doubt and anxiety that comes with life’s many ‘duh’ moments.

“The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?” – David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.

“But what ... is it good for?” – Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.

“Professor Goddard does not know the relation between action and reaction and the need to have something better than a vacuum against which to react. He seems to lack the basic knowledge ladled out daily in high schools.” –1921 New York Times editorial about Robert Goddard’s revolutionary rocket work.

“The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible.” – A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service. (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)

“This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication.

The device is inherently of no value to us.” – Western Union internal memo, 1876.

“I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable who’s falling on his face and not Gary Cooper.” – Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in “Gone With The Wind.”

“I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year.”

– The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957 “Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?”

– H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.

“We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.” – Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.

“Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.”

–Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.

“There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.” – Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

“The abdomen, the chest, “Airplanes are “So we went to Atari and said, and the brain will forever be interesting toys but ‘Hey, we’ve got this amazing thing, even shut from the intrusion of the of no military value.” built with some of your parts, and what wise and humane surgeon.”

– Marechal Ferdinand do you think about funding us? Or we’ll “Drill for oil? You – Sir John Eric Ericksen, British Foch, Professor of give it to you.

We just want to do it.

Pay “640K ought to mean drill into the ground surgeon, appointed SurgeonStrategy, Ecole our salary, we’ll come work for you.’ be enough for to try and find oil? You’re Extraordinary to Queen Superieure And they said, ‘No.’ So then we went to anybody.”

– Bill crazy.” – Drillers who Victoria 1873. de Guerre.

Hewlett-Packard, and they said, ‘Hey, we Gates, 1981 Edwin L. Drake tried to don’t need you. You haven’t got through enlist to his project to college yet.’” – Apple Computer Inc. drill for oil in 1859.

“Computers in the founder, Steve Jobs, on attempts to future may weigh no get Atari and H-P interested in “I think there “A cookie store is a more than 1.5 tons.” his and Steve Wozniak’s is a world market bad idea. Besides, the market – Popular Mechanics, personal computer. for maybe five research reports say forecasting the computers.”

America likes crispy cookies, relentless march of – Thomas Watson, “You want to have consistent not soft and chewy cookies science, 1949 Chairman of and uniform muscle development like you make.” – Response IBM, 1943 across all of your muscles? It to Debbi Fields’ idea “If I had thought about can’t be done. It’s just a fact of of starting Mrs. it, I wouldn’t have done the life. You just have to accept Fields’ Cookies.

“Stocks have reached experiment. The literature was inconsistent muscle development “Louis Pasteur’s what looks like a full of examples that said you as an unalterable condition of theory of germs is permanently high can’t do this.” – Spencer Silver weight training.” – Response to ridiculous fiction.”

“Everything that plateau.” – Irving on the work that led to the Arthur Jones, who solved the – Pierre Pachet, can be invented has Fisher, Professor of unique adhesives for 3-M “unsolvable” problem by Professor of been invented.”

Economics, Yale “Post-It” Notepads. inventing Nautilus.

Physiology at – Charles H. Duell, University, 1929.

Toulouse, 1872.

Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899. campus talk | november 2013 Totally useless fact: Some spiders have eight eyes.

24

R E B M E V O N

play with yourself

GO FIGURE

CR O S SWORD

SN OW FL AK ES

C RYPTO QUIP{

SUDOKU

Totally useless fact: Rain contains vitamin B12.

campus talk

|

rs are answe page 79 on

november 2013

25

C RYP UOTE TO Q

even star map

hocus focus

exc hange

26

campus talk

bridge hands

play with yourself

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Homely criminals get 50 percent longer jail sentences, on average, than good-looking criminals.

R E B M E V NO

you sooooo cheated

WORD HUNT!

! t o n k fear

MEGA MAZE where’s frank?

Totally useless fact: Married men revealed that they change their underwear twice as often as single men.

campus talk

|

november 2013

27

tic tac toe!

Use this space for TIC TAC TOE, or anything else you can think of to spare the borEdom of class!

Fall Events in Gainesville

Get Out And

Nov. 4: Big Bad Voodoo Daddy at Phillips Center Nov. 8: Gator Growl Nov. 16-17: Downtown Festival & Art Show Nov. 24: Cane Boil & FiddleFest at Morningside Nature Center Nov. 29: A Tuna Christmas opens Nov. 30: Gainesville Artwalk Nov. 30: A Christmas Carol opens Dec. 2: Hello Dolly!

Dec. 6: Holiday Lights First Friday Dec. 7: Holiday Tree Lighting Dec. 7: Craft Festival at O’Dome Dec. 31: Downtown Countdown

About!

Fall is an exciting time to be in Gainesville. Between UF Football, concerts, and art festivals, there’s always something going on. So take a break from campus and get out and about in Gainesville. For more information and a complete listing of events visit our website.

28

campus talk

|

november 2013

VisitGainesville.com

352.374.5260

Totally useless fact: 40 percent of all people who come to a party in your home snoop in your medicine cabinet.

hahahaha

Remember

When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law before the criminal gets arrested, we call him an accomplice. When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law after the criminal gets arrested, we call him a defense attorney.

send all jokes to funny@mycampus talk.com and you could win a Campus Talk t-shirt.

What’s the difference between an attorney and a trampoline? You take your boots off to jump on a trampoline.

What’s the definition of a tragedy? A busload of attorneys crashes off a cliff and one seat is empty.

What’s the difference between an attorney and a herd of buffalo? The attorney charges more.

A guy was driving his car with a blonde in the passenger seat. He asked her to look out the window and check if the blinker was working. She popped her head out and took a gander, then said, “Yes… no… yes… no… yes…”

A blonde, brunette and a redhead were trapped on an island 20 miles from shore. The redhead started swimming, got tired after two miles and turned around and swam back. Then the brunette started to swim and after seven miles of swimming she turned back.

The blonde jumped in and swam 19 miles, got tired and turned back.

Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat.

The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!” The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

Totally useless fact: The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

campus talk

|

november 2013

29

swoon worthy!

Find Out Who’s Crushing on You! Interview by Lauren Douglass

It can be tough to navigate the unfamiliar waters of online dating. Luckily, Swoon Spokesperson and Maxim Model Diana Falzone shares her insider opinion with us on the hot new Swoon mobile app and gives her tips on finding true love.

Can you tell me a little about Swoon? Swoon is a free, mobile dating app. It’s compatible with Facebook, though no one on your friends’ page is able to see it, so it’s like your own little secret. What’s interesting about Swoon is the caliber of people who are on it – it’s not your typical, competitive dating site. It really caters to the people who are looking for a professional, put-together, ready-to-settle-down individual.

What sorts of things should you put on your Swoon profile? You want to put your best foot forward, but you also want to stay true to who you are. Don’t go crazy with the airbrushing apps. For your profile picture, a big smile is always appealing. When filling out your personal information, list what you’re looking for but don’t be one of those TMI 30

campus talk

|

november 2013

people who say things like, “I’m looking to have a beautiful, white wedding day!” That’s taking it too far.

What are some of the mistakes people make when using Swoon?

I think what’s nice about Swoon is that it doesn’t allow you to make too many mistakes, because it’s an abbreviated version of your bio.

However, one of the mistakes people make is that they fib a bit. Studies have shown that men tend to fib about how much money they make and their height, and women tend to lie about their age. Lying, like your mother taught you, is never good, especially on dating sites.

So trust your gut. If something seems off, trust that instinct. A lot of times we tend to push away a bad feeling and think we’re being overly cautious, when in reality there is something that’s not right.

Why is speaking on this a passion of yours? I started out in radio as a Sirius XM host, and talking to my listeners, I got asked a lot of questions about my personal life and many people came to me looking for advice. Eventually, it has become a career.

Totally useless fact: Taste buds are functional at or before birth in dogs.

step right up

GUESS

e One Day in this Beverage A le ‌

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!

Guess what happens next: A. Girl shoplifts B. Girls make out C. Girls knock over stand-alone display D. Something else For the answer, turn the page.

CAMPUS POST OFFICE & COPY SHOP

NEED A PASSPORT?

$ 3.50 SWAMPHEAD DRAFTS

We are a U.S. Passport Acceptance Facility Passport Photos taken on­site

CALL FOR AN APPOINTMENT

352­392­1134

0- -)$.)'(4 $!),9

ALSO TRY GAINESVILLE’S ORIGINAL SWAMPWATER (GREAT-TASTING MIX OF MIDNIGHT OIL, 345-0+./#+%2 ")' ./3%

CAMPUS:

3% ND !VE s

WE DELIVER! RELISH2GO.COM DELIVERY FEE s NO HIDDEN FEES MUST BE PLACED ONLINE AT RELISH GO COM

3030 Radio Road

(located across from Lakeside Residential Complex)

www.maildocserv.ufl.edu

.

.

.

.

.

.

Color Copies Posters Business Cards Brochures Stamps Pamphlets Booklets Copy Paper

FREE PARKING!

Totally useless fact: A cockroach will live for nine days without its head before it starves to death.

campus talk

|

november 2013

31

step right up

GUESS

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT! One Day in the Beverage Aisle …

D. Something else

Thanks for playing, and remember: Beware of falling shelves!

watch full video 32

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: You can’t swing on vines in the jungle because they’re attached to the ground.

thanks, but no thanks

Reading Between the Lines:

We’ve heard them all before and probably have used them ourselves.

They’re the easy way out of letting someone down, but usually have a subtext to their derision. For the sake of clarity, here’s what they really mean when they scorn you.

The Art of

Rejection The Female Way

I think of you r. as a brothe of that

The male Way

you I think oisfter. as a se ugly.)

I’m not attra cted to you in ‘t hat’ way.

(You are the ugliest

(You remind me inbred banjo-playing geek in “Deliverance.”)

(You’r

ever laid eyes dork I’ve upon.)

d I’ve got a boyfrien a half

There’s a sligh t difference in o u r a ges.

(I don’t wan

(I prefer my male cat and gallon of Ben and Jerry’s).

t to do my dad)

ed mplicat o c o o t s My life i right nowin.g the whole pend lls ca us want yo r phone (I don’t se you may hea m seeing.) el s I’ night or l the other guy l a m o r f

I don’t date men where I work.

(I wouldn’t

g unfulfillin as boring and g better tha as my job is n dating yo u.)

It’s not you, it’s me.

(It’s you.)

e ugly.)

There’s a slight difference in our ages.

date you if you were in the same ‘solar sys tem’, much less the same building. )

I’m concen on my trating (Even somet career. hin

I’m celibate.

I’m not attra cted to you in ‘t hat’ way.

(You’r

I’ve got

a gir

(You’re u lfriend. gly.)

(You’re ugly.)

is too My lifeed right now. at complic ou’re ugly.)

(Y

u, It’s not yeo. it’s mugly.)

(You’re

I don’t date w where I worokmen .

(You’re ug ly.)

I’m concen on my catrrating eer.

(You’r e ugly.)

ate.

I’m celib ugly.)

(You’re

(I’ve sworn of f only the men like you.)

er 1 ...and the numb rejection line : given by women Let’s be friends.

(I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with. It’s that male perspective thing) Totally useless fact: Fish can’t blink. They don’t have eyelids.

...and the numbe r1 rejection line given by men:

Let’s b friendse.

(Y

ou’re sinfu lly ugly.)

campus talk

|

november 2013

33

free tickets

the

Cinema Escape: Films for the Holiday Movie-Goer by daniel sutphin

Animated, Comedy, Family 1 hr 35 min PG | mild rude humor Parents: Common Sense Media says OK for kids 6+.

If somehow you wind up being stuck with the family minors, this is a film that can entertain all ages. With characters voiced by Anna Faris, Bill Hader and Bruce Campbell, Cloudy 2 picks up where the initial film of the series left off. Inventor Flint Lockwood thought he saved the world when he destroyed his most infamous invention -- a machine that turned water into food causing cheeseburger rain and spaghetti tornadoes. But Flint learns that his invention survived and is now creating food-animals – “foodimals!” Attempting to save the world again, Flint and his friends embark on a mission to battle hungry tacodiles, shrimpanzees, hippotatomuses, cheespiders and other foodimals.

34

campus talk

|

november 2013

with hang ry to a s ously, s e nec , obvi s s i y t a i d i hol little While n the get a o o t y l t i n m d wa the fa ow an den to very n forbid e t l l o e e n r sa it’s as w eason them ten nter s from i k w a try, of d e s r b indu fall an c i t e a h a T nem s th t then. the ci er film t n i s r t u n b ta lock umme impor h to b ega s c m n u e a h l s, ven t giving ch film e rival e our su F opriat r . p s ot ap n movie e t a m th gh so rovide althou can p , n. n o e i t r a d il l vac a t for ch n e m -need much

Action/Sci-Fi/Thriller 1 hr 59 min R | Some Sexual Content/ Nudity, Language and Strong Violence Parents: Common Sense Media says not for kids.

Horror 1 hr 45 min PG-13 | Intense sequences of terror and violence, and thematic elements.

Parents: Common Sense Media says Iffy for 15+ Maybe leave the younger relatives at home for this.

Starring Patrick Wilson, Rose Byrne and Lin Shaye, “Insidious: Chapter 2,” catches up with the Lambert family, who find themselves still haunted by demons. They must work to uncover the mysterious childhood secret that has left them dangerously connected to the spirit world.

A film for the adult relatives, Vin Diesel returns as Riddick for the third installment in the series.

Betrayed by his people and left for dead on a sun-scorched planet, Riddick faces an alien race of predators. He activates an emergency beacon alerting two ships: one carrying a new breed of mercenary, and the other, captained by a man from Riddick’s past. Bounty hunters throughout the galaxy swarm on Riddick unknowingly playing into his greater scheme for revenge.

Riddick launches a full-on attack before returning to his home planet to save it from destruction.

Action/Adventure 1 hr 48 min R | strong bloody violence, some sexual content and language Parents: Common Sense Media says not for kids Leave the younger relatives with a guardian for this action-packed thrill ride. Danny Trejo returns as Machete with an all-star cast surrounding him. The President of the United States recruits Machete to fight his way through Mexico in order to quiet a dangerous radical and eliminate a wealthy arms dealer who plans to launch a weapon into space in order to destabilize the entire globe.

Totally useless fact: While trying to improve the telegraph, Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone.

free tickets

november 1

8

Ender’s Game

Thor: The Dark World

About Time

The Wolf of Wall Street

Free Birds

The Best Man Holiday

Last Vegas X

The Book Thief

22

29

Everybody knows going to the movie theater is not a cheap activity. Because money’s tight during the holidays, we’ve launched a contest to give away a two-person admission pass for

Frozen The Hunger Games: Catching Fire Delivery Man Nebraska

Oldboy Black Nativity Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom

Totally useless fact: Smart as he was, Freud couldn’t read a railway timetable.

To enter:

mycampustalk.com/fallmoviegiveaway and follow the instructions listed.

campus talk

|

november 2013

35

GUARAN

For Specials, Discounts, and More.

TEXT JIFFY3 TO 90210

TO SAVE YOTUE$E$D !

GATORBUCKS.COM

CAMPUS

1702 W. University Ave 352.692.4400

GRAB YOUR COPY NOW. HERE’S A FEW TO START YOU OFF! For Store Hours and Locations.

VISIT JIFFYSE.COM

1670 W. University Blvd., Unit 3 (352) 271-7977 1310C N.W. 23rd Ave (13th Street) (352) 375-6610

3265 SW 34th Street, Suite 3 352-519-5322

10

CONVENTIONAL, HIGH-MILEAGE, SUV OR SYNTHETIC

ANY JIFFY LUBE SIGNATURE SERVICE® OIL CHANGE

For the store nearest you visit JiffySE.com

Not valid with other coupons, specials or discount offers. Most vehicles. Up to 5 quarts. Visit JiffySE.com for participating locations. Jiffy Lube, the Jiffy Lube design mark and Jiffy Lube Signature Service® are registered trademarks of Jiffy Lube International, Inc. ©2013 Jiffy Lube International, Inc. All rights reserved.

Expires: 1/15/14 CODE: GB10

$

OFF EXPIRES: 01/15/14

Purchase a combination dinner (1–23) and get one free.

3265 SW 34th Street, Suite 3 352-519-5322

BUY 1 BUY 1 BUY 1 HOT DOG

HOT DOG HOT DOG GET ONE GET ONE GET ONE

Offer Valid 7/22/13-1/6/14 Offer Valid 7/22/13-1/6/14

FREE FREE FREE

*ValidOFFER at participating Gainesville, FLTO Kangaroo Express stores only VALID 7-22-13 1-6-14 *Valid at participating Gainesville, FL Kangaroo Express stores only Offer Valid 7/22/13-1/6/14

*VALID AT PARTICIPATING GAINESVILLE, FL KANGAROO EXPRESS STORES ONLY

*Valid at participating Gainesville, FL Kangaroo Express stores only

gatorbucks.com

BUY 1 GET 1 FREE

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

W/ PURCHASE OF TWO 22OZ FOUNTAIN DRINKS

DINE IN ONLY. NOT VALID W/OTHER COUPON OR SPECIAL OFFERS OR ON COMBOS. LIMIT ONE PER PERSON.

www.gatorbucks.com

BUY ONE GET ONE

www.gatorbucks.com

FREE

Dinner:

4005 SW 40TH BLVD. 352-336-3188

mirakujapenesesteakhouse.com

CLOSED MONDAYS

SUNDAY–THURSDAY: 4PM–10PM FRIDAY–SATURDAY: 4PM–11PM

FREE ENTREE ON YOUR BIRTHDAY!

Miraku Japanese Steakhouse

Located at 34th Street and W. University Ave. Cold Beer, Cigarettes, Ice, and all the snacks you want.

Stop by Paradise for all your needs.

CHEVRON

Checkout Our Full Menu at: www.piesanostogo.com

(352) 371 7437 (352) 371 8646

YOU CAN FIND MORE LIKE THESE IN GATOR BUCKS

0''

"/:

8*5) 163$)"4&

1*5" 03 4"-"%

Valid CAMPUS ONLY

Valid IN STORE ONLY

CAMPUS

EXP 01-15-14

1702 W. University Ave 352.692.4400

5200 NW 43rd St. (Hunters Crossing) (352) 371 7437

5757 SW 75th St. (Tower Square) (352) 371 8646

CHEVRON

Checkout Our Full Menu at: www.piesanostogo.com

0' "/: $0.#0

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

ONLY $16.95

LARGE 3-TOPPING PIZZA

Order on-line at www.pitapit2go.com

www.gatorbucks.com

FREE

BREADSTICKS OR 1/2 DOZEN GARLIC ROLLS WITH PURCHASE OF ANY MEDIUM PIZZA OR LARGER

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

(TAKE OUT ONLY. NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER COUPON, OFFER, OR DISCOUNT. PLEASE MENTION COUPON WHEN ORDERING.)

www.gatorbucks.com

ANY PURCHASE OF $10 OR MORE

$2 OFF

Minimum $10 merchandise or 8 gallons of gasoline. Not Valid on Lottery, money orders, bill pay

EXPIRES 01/15/14

mirakujapenesesteakhouse.com

4005 SW 40TH BLVD. 352-336-3188

CLOSED MONDAYS

SUNDAY–THURSDAY: 4PM–10PM FRIDAY–SATURDAY: 4PM–11PM

Dinner:

FREE ENTREE ON YOUR BIRTHDAY!

Miraku Japanese Steakhouse

Located at 34th Street and W. University Ave. Stop by Paradise for all your needs.

COLD BEER s CIGARETTES s SNACKS s ICE www.gatorbucks.com

Miraku

a leader in Teppanyaki

$5 OFF

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

any purchase of $25 or more www.gatorbucks.com

Reitz Union ground floor 352-392-1637 www.union.ufl.edu/games

Rattlesnake bites or Cheese Fries

WITH PURCHASE OF ANY ENTREE. DINE IN, MON–THURS ONLY. NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER OFFERS. 1 PER TABLE PER VISIT PLEASE. EXPIRES 01/15/14

=VcY

2800 SW 2nd Avenue Gainesville, FL 32607 AT THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORIDA

MARK BOSTICK GOLF COURSE

OPEN LATE GREAT FOOD MADE FRESH DELIVERED FAST

GAINESVILLE FL 3857 SW ARCHER RD

WINGHOUSE.COM

352.372.9464

www.gatorbucks.com

EXP 01/15/14

&2%% MUST PRESENT COUPON AT TIME OF PURCHASE. LIMIT ONE (1) COUPON PER PERSON PER VISIT.

'%4 /.% "!'

BUY ONE BAG OF RANGE BALLS, www.gatorbucks.com

2800 SW 2nd Avenue Gainesville, FL 32607 AT THE UNIVERSITY OF FLORIDA

MARK BOSTICK GOLF COURSE

TerrysAutoService.com

go online for even more coupons CANNOT USE WITH ANY OTHER COUPON. MONDAYS ONLY.

EXPIRES: 1/15/14

REGULAR PRICE OF OIL CHANGE

OFF

www.gatorbucks.com

DELIVERY ALL DAY AND NIGHT

1/2 OFF BURGER BASKET

1/2 LB

MONDAY

BURGURMANIA Order Online at wingzone.com ENTIRE PURCHASE

15% OFF

/.% #/50/. 0%2 #534/-%2 s ./4 6!,)$ 7)4( !.9 /4(%2 #/50/. /2 /&&%2 EXPIRES: 1/15/14

923 West University Ave. 352.377.2473 Delivering the best wings in Gainesville since 1991

www.gatorbucks.com

DEALS FOR GREAT

SCAN ME

NOT REDEEMABLE FOR CASH, CANNOT BE USED WITH ANY OTHER OFFERS. MUST BE PRESENTED PRIOR TO SERVICE. EXP 01/15/14

NOW SERVING WINGSTREET!

Oaks Mall & Tower Rd. 332-0032 13th Street & Downtown 338-1776 order online: www.pizzahut.com

Northwest & Midtown: 373-7733 On Campus & Archer Rd. 374-4440

Corner of Univ Ave & 34th St, 3425 W University Ave 377-7666

CUT ST E A K S

.com

923 W University Ave

FEATURE 352.377.2473

6501 SW Archer Rd.

377-2886

r Brakes r A/C Repair r r Tune-Ups r Tires r r Alternators r CV Axles r r & much, much more! r

go online for even more coupons

TerrysAutoService.com

3830 SW Archer Rd (352) 377-2820

Fall

(352) 338-1068 WWW.SUSHI-2-GO.COM

FREE 3830 SW Archer Rd (352) 377-2820

www.gatorbucks.com

DC:

;G::

W/COUPON. ONE COUPON PER CUSTOMER

ONE COUPON PER PERSON PER VISIT

Reitz Union ground floor 352-392-1637 www.union.ufl.edu/games

WHEN YOU ORDER ANY SUSHI ROLL AND A SMALL FOUNTAIN SODA

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

<6B: D; 7DLA>C<

www.gatorbucks.com

$1 OFF

(IN-STORE PURCHASE ONLY. MUST PRESENT COUPON AT TIME OF ORDERING. NOT VALID FOR DELIVERY.) CANNOT BE USED WITH THE 3 ROLLS FOR $10 DISCOUNT OR ANY OTHER OFFERS

EXPIRES: 1/15/14

(352) 338-1068 WWW.SUSHI-2-GO.COM

www.gatorbucks.com

$10 OFF

any purchase over $50.00

NOT VALID WITH ANY OTHER COUPON, CLEARANCE ITEMS OR ITEMS ENDING WITH $.55. NOT APPLICABLE TO PRIOR PURCHASES. COUPON CAN ONLY BE USED ONCE PER DAY/PER PERSON. COUPON CAN’T BE USED ON NEW BATS OVER $150.00. IN STOCK ITEMS ONLY.

Not valid w/

pizzas only. or Hand-tossed e: L3 other offers. Cod

LY. Valid a offerings. Not valid w/ any CARRYOUT ON limited time pizz

, Thin ‘n Crispy on regular Pan

9 JUST $6

LARGE PIZZA 1-TOPPING 9

Oaks Mall & Tower Rd. 332-0032 13th Street & Downtown 338-1776 order online: www.pizzahut.com

NOW SERVING WINGSTREET!

Northwest & Midtown: 373-7733 On Campus & Archer Rd. 374-4440

EXPIRES: 01/15/14

Corner of University Ave and 34th St, 3425 W University Ave 377-7666

www.gatorbucks.com

FAVO

ICA’S AMER RITE PIZZA

www.gatorbucks.com

EXP: 01/15/14

damned you siri

Y PL AP AY D O T

GREAT LOCATIONâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;WALK TO CLASS apply today @ royal village.com

Â&#x20AC;xÂ&#x161;n iÂ&#x20AC;Â&#x2026;j Â&#x2018; s Â?Â&#x2026;Â&#x201A; jaÂ&#x201A;Â?Â&#x2022; Â&#x2018; iÂ&#x20AC;Â&#x2026;j Â&#x2018; s Â?Â&#x2026;Â&#x201A; Â&#x2018;Â&#x2026;Â?Â&#x2026;Â?xÂ&#x201D; Â? Â?Â&#x2026;Â&#x203A; Ă&#x2020; Â&#x2022;Â?v Â?a l nl Â?nÂ&#x2018;Â&#x2026;Â?Â&#x201D; Â&#x2018;Â&#x201D; Â?Â&#x20AC;n aÂ&#x201A; nÂ&#x192;xÂ&#x201D;xnÂ&#x2018; Ă&#x2020; xÂ&#x192;lxÂ&#x161;xlÂ&#x2022;aÂ&#x20AC; Â&#x20AC;na Â&#x2018;nÂ&#x2018; PÂ&#x2026;Â?aÂ&#x20AC;YxÂ&#x20AC;Â&#x20AC;avn jÂ&#x2026;Â&#x201A; Ă&#x2020; " Ă&#x2020; ! QZ /nÂ?Â&#x2026;Â&#x201D; $Â&#x161;n ž #

38

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Isaac Newton dropped out of school because his mother wanted him to be a successful farmer.

damned you siri

THE WHAT’S HAPPENING NETWORK

Let us help you reach thousands with outdoor advertising on The What’s Happening Truck

Full service design studio providing clients with our best creative talents.

Publishing division creating the best in college publications to college students.

Connecting students to student properties clear across the country. Traffic is our middle name.

Totally useless fact: Vincent van Gogh didn’t cut off his ear--not all of it anyway. He only cut a portion of the lobe.

From pens to ping pong tables, our promotional department can handle all of your logo merchandising needs.

campus talk

|

november 2013

39

charted

iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d rather step on lego

things we need/want

how congress operates

things congress does get shot

what group projects are supposed to teach you

what group projects taught me collaboration

teamwork

trust NO ONE

collaboration

teamwork

responsibility

40

campus talk

|

november 2013

communications

communications

responsibility

Totally useless fact: Eskimos do not and did not live in igloos. Generally an igloo is an emergency shelter.

true or false!

& S H T MY S D N E G E L

l Sutphin

By Danie

Them d n i h e B ) s e tory(Li any urban legends that turn S e h t d n a ends Similar can be said of the mhile some start as fact, morostugh g e L n a b r U W th t! mmunities. e years and circulate co wnright false over th Spot the Nothe word of mouth. Despiteethitosd of world. e th ns around d or do urate m ls fast by e most acc News trave th s y e” game a lw a t ’s no “Telephon e th s a st swiftness, it Ju n. provided informatio formation g in in e rr th e l, sf o n o a h the tr in grade sc change by s u to to re d su le is a reve people of a line of at the start . hes its end time it reac

distorte ip-glutto all the goss f o rs e e sn the

e! u r t s i end g e l h c i s wh s e u g n ca u o y f i See rs are in *answe

icular no part

order

myths in cinema

Ronald Reagan was the actor originally selected to play the role of Rick Blaine in “Casablanca.”

The movie “Fargo” was based on a true story.

The State of Idaho passed a resolu tion commending Jared and Jerusha Hess for t he production of t heir film “Napolean Dynamite.”

One of th e women in the Ja mes Bond Your Eyes film “For Only” use d to be a guy.

Totally useless fact: The main purpose of a horse’s front legs is to keep it up.

The 1989 fi lm “Back to the Fu correctly ture” predicted t h e of the 199 outcome 7 World S eries. campus talk

|

november 2013

41

true or false!

MYTHSLED&!

A E V E R LEGENDS

By Daniel Sutphin

THE T RUTH EXPOSED! e: False m o c t u o s e , this re true orld Seri

s ‘97 W

edict r P e r u t u he F

ish we

t w team a ies we even a ure ser ’t t n u e F r e e e h h w t , where d they ack to ar 2015 ies, an e n the B r y i e ) S e s r e d d u l r m d r boa the fut ‘97 Wor n unna .e. hove oes to on the wept a g s (i w y s s d l g n a F n i h c l i later M s th ar e rump go Cub Marty rida M h many ies. Th e Chica e film, r h As wit h The Flo e t t S . t n t d I a o d l h n n ians r . land I the Wo ating t leased dly, is e Cleve was re to win . cast st too, sa h d e n t i l a t v r o o a r a e b m m adcast s e the not a rlins b m’s bro ts new the tim gator, ida Ma the fil r ic spor a o h d y l p e F b a t r i n d g c e e holo ately fter th present sees a naccur was re r 1997, a e who i Octobe n m that o n a e i e t m t o e i s rn Miam or by he Inte a joke, ld on t ies, as r e took ho S d l r the Wo to win

Back to t

True A hero for Idaho:

t, egislature did, in fac The Idaho State L d mmending Jared an pass a resolu tion co The apolean Dynamite.”

Jerusha Hess for “N from t of reasons ranging resolu tion cited a lis d and d creativity of Jare an nt le ta n, sio vi t he crease e resulting in an in Jerusha to t he movi city omic growt h for t he in tourism and econ he film was shot . of Preston where t

TURN TO PAGE 56 TOO AWESOME TO BELIEVE? THIS BILL. TO READ THE ACTUAL TEXT OF

42

campus talk

|

november 2013

Here is look ing at you … Gipp er: False De

spite having been menti oned in vari books, arti ous cles and so und bites, was never co Reagan nsidered to take the ro of Rick Bla le ine. The ru m o r comes fr a fake pres om s release W arner Bros. planted with “The Hollywo od Reporter on January ” 5, 1942. It read, “Ann Sheridan an d Ronald Re agan co-sta for the thir r d time in W ar ners' "Casablanc a," with De nnis Morgan coming in fo also r top billin g.”

Far-go it for me to tell you what’s true, but this, too, is False

Known for playfulness, “Fargo” creators, the Coen Brothers, kicked off the rumor that their film was based on a true story when, in the opening, they added, “This is a true story. The events depicted in this film took place in Minnesota in 1987.

At the request of the survivors, the names have been changed. Out of respect for the dead, the rest has been told exactly as it occurred.” In “Sleepers’ Casts Faith to Win,” published in the Chicago Sun-Times, Roger Ebert explained that the Coen brothers admitted it wasn’t based on a true story, rather that the opening claim was used as a stylist device.

Dude Looks Like … err… is a Lady: True The 1981 film “For Your Eyes Only”, Caroline Cossey, one of the “Bond girls” in the film was a transexual, however, it wasn't discovered until after the film had completed production.

Totally useless fact: Horses don’t pull wagons with all four legs. Their real pulling power comes from their hind legs.

my rough life!

i’m too old for gummy vitamins so now i have to take the normal pill, ones that don’t have a delicious flavor

Every Day is Gameday

In Gainesville every day is Gameday, only the venues change! So whether you love going outdoors or simply going out to eat, we’ve got just what you’re looking for. Paddle the Santa Fe River, dine at one of our delicious local restaurants or search for treasures at local boutiques and vintage shops downtown. Gainesville, where nature and culture meet.

www.visitgainesville.com 352.374.5260

VisitGainesvilleFlorida

Totally useless fact: The force, which is used to immobilize prey, is strong enough to stun an adult human.

campus talk

@ Gainesville |

november 2013

43

Finding an Apartment

powered by collegerentals.com

Tips & Checklist

Before You Set Out: Make a shopping list.

Are you looking for hardwood floors, dishwasher, washer and dryer? Do you have enough parking space for you and your roommates? Does the whole apartment need to be painted in orange and blue? You may not find everything, but it doesn’t hurt to set priorities.

Cover the bases.

Many landlords will want to verify your references. Phone ahead to alert possible references, including your former landlord, that they may receive a call.

During the Search: Try to see the units in the daytime.

You’ll want to know how much natural light an apartment gets.

It’s helpful to see what shape the place is in and whether more work is needed to make it habitable.

Do a careful walk-through of any unit you’re serious about.

The best time to ask about repairs and improvements is before you commit. Attach a list of any damages to the lease, and have it initialed by your landlord so you’re not held responsible later.

This is especially important in a college town. Who knows who may have lived in the apartment before you!

Take measurements.

Take measurements of your larger furnishings (and take along a tape measure) to see how your things will fit… or what things you’ll need to buy. Be realistic about the move. If you have a king-size waterbed, maybe the fourth floor isn’t the best spot for you.

Ask Questions.

The College Rentals Apartment Tips & Checklist provides a thorough list of questions to ask.

Meet the neighbors!

Will you live above or below someone; do you share walls? Knock on doors and introduce yourself. Find out if neighbors are friendly, how they feel about noise, what they like about the neighborhood. This is a good person to ask about the safety of a neighborhood. Landlords aren’t allowed to discuss such things, but your new neighbor will know if the place has bad lighting or a wild Rottweiler problem.

Visit as many places as you can…

so you’ll have a good idea of what your money buys. Use our Apartment Checklist as a guide to inspecting and comparing choices.

Then be prepared to ACT QUICKLY when you find something you like! Lots of complexes are on the internet. While you shouldn’t rely too heavily on the web, it is a good lace to get started narrowing to a list of possibilities. Check out www.collegerentals.com.

ITEM APARTMENT NAME} 1) Amount of Rent?

2) Amount of Security Deposit?

3) Amount of Late Payment Penalty?

4) Pet Fee? 5) Individual Leases?

6) Size of Apartment?

7) Penalty for Breaking Lease?

8) Furnished?

9) Private Bathrooms?

10) Utilities Included?

11) Cable Included?

12) High-Speed Internet/Ethernet?

13) Allowed to Paint Walls?

14) Ample Power Outlets/Phone Jacks?

15) Kitchen Appliances in Good Condition?

16) Vaulted Ceilings?

17) Ceiling Fans?

18) Curtains and Blinds?

19) Fitness Center? Office on site?

20) Tennis Courts/Basketball/Volleyball?

21) Overall Condition of Apartment?

22) Plenty of Closet and Storage Space?

23) Security/Alarms?

24) Washer/Dryers or Laundry Facilities?

25) Convenient to School?

26) Convenient to Bus Routes?

27) Convenient to Stores?

28) Quiet Community or Active Area?

29) Ample Parking?

30) Convenient Visitor Parking?

31) Porch/Patio?

32) Garbage Dumpster Proximity?

33) Maid Service?

34) Smoke Detectors/Carbon Monoxide Detector?

35) Gated Entry?

campus talk

|

november 2013

Rentals Rentals

After You’ve Found It:

Read your lease thoroughly… and make sure you understand it.

Don’t be afraid to ask!

For example;

• What utilities are you responsible for?

• H ow is the television reception?

• Will you need cable?

• I s there reference to existing wear or damage or a penalty for breaking the lease?

• H ow does the management feel about subleases?

44

Enjoy.

No apartment is going to be perfect; how much you enjoy where you live is largely up to you. Meet the people at the complex, and you’ll enjoy your living experience much more than if you stay indoors, drinking alone. Hang out at the pool. Play some basketball. Throw a party. No matter how you feel about the physical space you occupy, new friends can make you feel right at home.

Totally useless fact: The electric eel, which lives in Brazil and the Guianas, can release a shock of up to 650 volts.

Frequent Q&A My landlord refuses to make repairs, what can I do?

Hopefully you have kept a record of when you first reported the problem and asked that repairs be made. Be sure to document in writing each and every report and complaint made to the landlord. Keep a notebook next to the phone for recording conversations with your landlord. For each conversation, write the date, time, name of the person with whom you spoke, and what was said by each party to the conversation.

If the landlord fails to make repairs within a reasonable time, you can report the problems to the city housing code office and ask for an inspection. If violations of the housing code are found, ask your landlord for a partial refund of the rent for the period of time that the violation existed.

You may be able to either withhold your rent or terminate your lease if the problem constitutes a material breach of the lease or the landlord’s statutory duty to provide and maintain a reasonably safe and habitable dwelling. You must follow the exact requirements of Florida Statute 83.56.

You must give the landlord a written notice demanding the repairs be made in seven days.

The notice must indicate your intention to terminate the lease or withhold rent if the repairs are not made. The notice should be hand delivered or sent by certified mail.

Be sure and keep a copy of the letter.

This is a complicated process and the legal consequences are very serious. You should consult Student Legal Services before attempting to terminate your lease or withhold rent.

Can I deduct repair costs from my rent?

No. Florida Law does not authorize you to make repairs or to recover the cost of such repairs. In fact, most apartment leases prohibit repairs by tenants. Therefore, if you want to make repairs and deduct the cost from the rent, you must obtain prior consent from your landlord.

Can my landlord raise my rent during my lease term?

Not unless the lease contains a specific provision allowing for a rent increase. From the tenant’s perspective, one of the primary reasons for having a written lease is to lock in the rent for the rental period. READ THE LEASE BEFORE YOU SIGN IT. Normally, you should not sign a lease providing for a rent increase.

Can I break my lease if I have good reason?

“I am graduating?” NO! “My roommate left?” NO! “I cannot afford the rent?” NO! “I need to work this summer?” NO! “The neighborhood is unsafe?” NO!

You can only terminate the lease if the landlord is materially violating your lease or the Florida Residential Landlord and Tenant Act. You should obtain legal advice before attempting to terminate your lease. In many cases, the best thing you can do is find a replacement tenant.

How soon must I renew my lease?

There is no legally established time period.

You should not sign a lease that provides for automatic renewals or requires you to give the landlord a notice of non-renewal. If you do sign such a lease, you must strictly comply with the notice requirements imposed by the lease.

If the lease does not specify otherwise, renewals are a matter of general contract law.

The landlord cannot force you to renew prior to the end of your lease. However, if you do not renew by the landlord’s “deadline,” the landlord may rent your apartment to someone else.

What can happen if I don’t pay rent?

Failure to pay rent is the quickest way to be evicted. The landlord will serve a notice demanding payment of rent or possession of the apartment. If you fail to comply with the demand within three days, excluding weekends and holidays, eviction proceedings may be started. Neither surrender of the apartment nor eviction ends your liability for rent. You should immediately contact Student Legal Services if you receive a three-day notice.

Can I be evicted if I pay “my” rent and my roommates don’t?

Usually. Most leases provide that the tenants are jointly and severally liable for the entire rent. That means that you are both responsible for each other’s share and jointly responsible for paying the full amount. Therefore, the landlord can evict you unless the full rent is paid. It is possible for you to sue your roommates in small claims court to collect their share of the rent and utilities. A written roommate agreement will be helpful in proving your case in court.

Given the difficulty of collecting money on a judgment quickly, the best thing you can do is obtain new roommates.

> «Õà `}i > iÃÛ i°V Ê UÊ ÎxÓ°ÎÇÈ°Ónää ÓnääÊ-7Ê7 ÃÌ Ê, >`]Ê > iÃÛ i]Ê À `>

Note: This information does not apply to apartments offering individual leases.

Totally useless fact: A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue.

campus talk

|

november 2013

45

sign on the dotted keg

CT’s Certified

Roommate Contract

Living with a complete stranger can be difficult.

Unfortunately, for all of you planning on bunking up with a buddy, living with friends can also be difficult.

That’s why the first thing you’ll learn about this fabled “real world” is the utter importance of getting everything (and we mean everything) in writing. To help facilitate that, we’ve drawn up a can’t-fail, tried-and-true roomie contract to help settle all disputes before they ever happen. Think of it as a pre-nup, minus the romance and sex… or not.

CT’s ROOMMATE

CONTRACT This contract hereby states that and will cohabitate in a peaceful and respectful manner from the day they move in to the day they move out. After that, they can be jackasses to each other whenever they’d like.

Whereas said roommates agree not to steal each other’s significant others, one-night stands, possible hook-ups and/or prostitutes (if applicable).

And whereas said roommates agree not to fart in public while other cohabitants and/or their friends and family are present (unless said fart is part of a joke or prank, in which case it is permissible). Moreover, all cohabitants agree to abide by “whoever smelt it, dealt it.”

And whereas all cohabitants agree to abide by the “whoever killed it, fills it” rule pertaining to all alcoholic beverages, specifically kegs.

And whereas if one roommate buys a pizza, no other roommate may eat a slice unless given direct permission from said buyer.

And whereas said roommates agree never to wake up before 10 a.m., regardless of whether or not they have an 8:30 a.m. class (or exam, for that matter).

And whereas all roommates agree that if and when Anchorman is playing on TV, no cohabitant may change the channel or ask for the volume to be lowered. This also applies during weeks of midterm and final exams.

And whereas all cohabitants involved in serious relationships will not publicly display affection around any other cohabitants or guests unless said significant other is really, really, really hot.

All signing participants agree to uphold and abide by said rules and regulations.

If any individual roommate should fail to meet these requirements, they may be subjected to hours of TPing at the hands of their fellow cohabitants.

(Sign and Date)

(Sign and Date) This contract is certified by Campus Talk and should be notarized by Frank.

DROP OF BLOOD HERE!

46

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Inflammable is not the opposite of flammable. Both words mean “easily set on fire.”

FLU SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS

EVERYBODY! TIDD Vn FEV t GBDFCPPL DPN VGTIDD t UXJUUFS DPN VGTIDD

Seasonal influenza vaccine provides the best protection available from seasonal flu.

SAVE YOURSELF THE HEADACHE. GET YOUR FREE* FLU SHOT AT UF STUDENT HEALTH TODAY! *Free flu shots (intramuscular injection only) available to current UF students with valid UF ID. Visit shcc.ufl.edu for more information.

tough love

Interview by Sarah G. Mason

Kyle Keller Did you always know that you wanted to be in the entertainment business? As a kid, I loved all things entertainment.

I always had a dream of performing on Broadway. After college, I moved to New York City. I was auditioning for Broadway, but in 2007 I had career-ending throat surgery. I was crushed. The only thing I knew how to do was sing. Then, while I was living in New York, I got scouted

by MAXIM Radio, and slowly but surely, opportunities began to fall into my lap. It was a blessing in disguise.

48

campus talk

|

november 2013

Why did you decide to audition for “Tough Love?” I had gotten out of a relationship a little more than a year ago. I was pretty heartbroken. My friends would try to set me up on dates, but it just didn’t work. Then, when I moved to L.A., I had an opportunity to be a part of “Tough Love.” I knew that the only way to stop being so darn scared and really learn to wear my heart on my sleeve again would be to do it on television.

Totally useless fact: About 3000 years ago, most Egyptians died by the time they were 30.

tough love

How do you hope people will react to the show? I don’t regret anything I said or did on the show. I hope that people will be able to relate to me and that my story will touch others; that they’ll think, “Well if Kyle can do this, then I can too.”

Can you tell me something that happened on the show that you didn’t expect? I didn’t expect it to be co-ed. When we filmed the first episode, there were eight girls. We all thought we were the cast for the season. Our first challenge was to go on a speed date with these eight guys, and we were like, “Oh my God, these guys are nuts, they’re horrible, we wouldn’t want to date any of them.” We trashed them. Lo and behold, Steve brings them into the group room and narrows it down to four girls and four guys. We had no clue that was going to happen.

What did you learn from being on the show? My name on the show is “Miss Disconnected.” In the past, I’ve always liked to do long distance. I traveled all over the world so for me it was just easier.

Really though, I was a little bit afraid of intimacy because I didn’t want to hang out with the guy every day. I had to learn to open my heart and start connecting to guys again. I can’t say whether I’m single or not, you’ll have to watch the show, but I will say that I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life, and this show had a lot to do with it.

Television host, red carpet correspondent and MAXIM radio personality Kyle Keller has something new to add to her resume: Reality TV star. Keller stars in the sixth season of VH1’s “Tough Love” – a whirlwind experience that changed her life for the better. Now, Keller talks about her time on the show and gives some much-needed advice to single women looking for love.

Tough Love airs Wednesdays at 10-9 Central

Follow Kyle Keller on /mskylekeller , /MsKyleKeller, /MsKyleKeller, & Ms.KyleKeller.com

For those who aren’t familiar with the show, can you give us a quick overview? This is one of the top rated shows on VH1.

Steve Ward takes a group of desperately single women, brings them into the house and basically breaks them down and brings them back up. He gives dating advice from a male perspective and really doses out the tough love.

Totally useless fact: Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different.

For girls like you who prefer long distance relationships, what advice do you have? Many people say absence makes the heart grow fonder, which is true to a point. But eventually one of you is going to have to move. If you want to make it work, you can’t do long distance forever.

This season, Steve’s sister Monica steps in. Do you think she changes the dynamic of the show? Absolutely. The difference between Monica and Steve is that Steve is really intimidating. He’s a really good looking guy. He’s nice when he wants to be, but then he yells at you and tells you what you’re doing wrong because he wants to get it through your thick skull that this is the only way you’re going to have a long and lasting relationship. With us girls, we related to Monica a little bit more.

What about women who have had their heart broken? What advice do you have for them? If you get out of a relationship and start dating right away, that’s how you get into the rebound relationships. You have to let your heart heal. I let myself heal a good six months before I came on the show, and even then I was still guarded. My ex told me that he didn’t want to be in a relationship right now, but he moved on so quickly after me that I realized he really just didn’t want to be in a relationship with me. I asked myself, “What am I doing wrong? What’s wrong with me?” There really wasn’t anything wrong, we just weren’t right for each other.

You make a good point, because a lot of women do take it personally if a relationship doesn’t work out, and we really shouldn’t do that. Exactly. Also, when people say, “It’s not you, it’s me,” it really is them! Feelings can change, and if they say that I would believe them. When you hear those words it’s time to move on because there’s someone else waiting for you.

campus talk

|

november 2013

49

RIDDLE ME THIS!

MIND

#1 Who is your moth er’s only sister’s son’s brother’s aunt’s daughter’s sister’s father?

GAMES in in a r b r u o y p e e k To ing g n u lo e il h w e p sha on your couch…

#5

e match, on a If you had only on da y, and you entere freezing winter da ne ed a lamp, a kerose room which contain ch burning stove, whi heater and a wood rst. should you light fi

#2

1) Your Father, 2) Inkstand, 3) The man had hiccups, 4) Lounger 5) The match.

eight t n a e m a N tha d r o w r lette t” in the has “ks in the middle, g, and n beginni nd ? e at the 50

campus talk

|

november 2013

#3

the bar a pub, sits down at A man walks into . and orders a water en, quickly at the man, and th The bartender looks m. and points it at hi pulls out a shotgun s. nk you,” and leave The man said, “Tha ve this way?

Why did they beha

#4

What seven-lett e word becomes r longer when the third letter is removed?

Totally useless fact: Fortune cookies were actually invented in America, in 1918, by Charles Jung.

hahahaha

Q. What do you call a cow with no legs?

A. Ground beef.

Remember to

send all jokes funny@mycampus talk.com and you could win a Campus Talk t-shirt.

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn’t find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy replied, “No ma’am, they’re dead.”

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.

Without missing a beat she said, “Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub.”

A trucker is driving along the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, “Low Bridge Ahead.” Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, “Got stuck, huh?” The truck driver says, “No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas.”

Totally useless fact: A toothpick is the object most often choked on by Americans.

The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class.

Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?” A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, “A basketball coach?”

campus talk

|

november 2013

51

hmnnn, sushi

Sushi

Etiquette

Do

Put the whole portion in your mouth, holding the sushi so the fish touches your tongue.

Don’t

Do

Rub your chopstick together to remove splinters. (It’s rude; a good sushi bar would never offer chopsticks of such low quality.)

Lightly dip the fish, not the rice, into a small amount of soy sauce.

Do

Don’t

52

campus talk

|

november 2013

Dunk the rice in the soy sauce.

Pick up Sushi using chopsticks (Hashi) or fingers. Both are correct.

Totally useless fact: The opposite sides of a dice cube always add up to seven.

hmnnn, sushi

Do

Don’t Bite the sushi in half and put the remainder back on the plate.

Use the blunt back end of the chopsticks when taking food from a shared plate.

Don’t Flop a big piece of pickled ginger onto your sushi before eating it.

(Eat the ginger between pieces of sushi, as a palate cleanser.)

Don’t Dump wasabi into your soy sauce, turning it into a soup. Wasabi should be put directly onto the sushi, if added at all.

Don’t Hand money to the sushi chef. The chef typically never touches money.

Do Rest the narrow, rounded ends of your chopsticks on the small ceramic holder, or hashi-oki, when you’re not using them.

One way to signal that you’re finished is to place your chopsticks across your soy saucer (don’t just rest the tips), parallel to the sushi bar.

Totally useless fact: The oldest whiskey distillery in the world is in Ireland and started distilling in 1657.

campus talk

|

november 2013

53

UN-FORTUNE-ATE!

?

TUNE OR ..

F OF Say. Nothing puts that button on some s MSG-laced, coma-rendering Chinese iu c takeout, like the ever-informative, words u COOKIES f of “wisdom” found in a fortune cookie. n o C The following are some of those cookies’ hidden gems (as well as a little commentary for further enjoyment)!

(

54

campus talk

|

november 2013

)

Totally useless fact: A coat hanger is 44 inches long if straightened.

When you see it around town…

…you’ll say to yourself, “hey, that’s the What’s Happening Truck!”

FOR OUTDOOR ADVERTISING OPPORTUNITIES, CONTACT SHANE AT 352-371-5881 OR EMAIL US AT: INFO@THEWHATSHAPPENINGTRUCK.COM

idaho passes “napolean dynamite” bill

AMITE A POLEON DY N N S N EA M D N AYS A and Jerusha Hess ..................by W mmending Jared co HCR029............... d an amite. re tu sla “Napoleon Dyn of the Legi ie s ov ng m di e th fin g of in n at St oductio - 2005 Preston for the prty-eighth Legislature First Regular Session and the City of IDA HO Fif

Continued from pages 17 & 18

E STATE OF

WAYS AN D TION NO. 29 | BY URRENT RESOLU NC CO E US HO | S REPRESENTATIVE IN TH E HOUSE OF JARED EE ITT D COMM EN DING VIE MM CO S AN ME MO IV E FIN DINGS AN

TH LEGISLATURE OF

TION OF TH E ING LEGISLAT RESOLUTION STAT FOR TH E PRODUC A CONCURRENT SS AN D TH E CITY OF PRESTON AN D JERUSHA HE MITE.” “NAPOLEON DY NA

Idaho recognizes WHEREAS, the State ofcre ativity of Jared and nt the vision, tale ting and wri the in ss and Jerusha He Dynamite”; production of “Napoleon and and beautiful City WHEREAS, the scenic Franklin and the of ty un Co n, sto Pre of eriencing exp are ho Ida of te Sta economic and rism tou sed rea inc and ; wth gro

Jared Hess is a WHEREAS, filmmakerwa s educated in o wh an native Idaho system; and l oo sch blic the Idaho pu h School Hig n WHEREAS, the Presto ff, particularly the administration and sta oyed notoriety cafeteria staff, have enjion ; and and worldwide attent figure prominently WHEREAS, tater totsmo ting Idaho’s most pro s thu in this film and ; ort famous exp

WHEREAS furthered , the friendship be multiethn tw ic relation een Napoleon an ships; and d Pedro h WHEREAS as athletics; , Uncle Rico’s footb and all skills a re a testam WHEREAS ent to Ida ho better air , Napoleon’s bicyc q le u a a n lit d Kip’s ska y and carp depende teb oo nt metho ds of tran ling as alternative oard promote sportation s to fuelWHEREAS ; a n , d highlights Grandma’s trip to a long-ho the St. An nored Ida th ho vacati ony Sand Dunes WHEREAS on destin ation; and keychains , Rico and Kip’s Tu self-suffici and glamour sho pperware sales an ts promo d Deb’s ency in Id te aho’s sma ll towns; a entrepreneurism WHEREAS and nd of the imp, Napoleon’s artisti c ortance o f the visu rendition of Trisha al arts in K -12 educais an example tion; and

“ Idi o t s !”

ute to with LaFawnduh is a trib and ry; WHEREAS, Kip’s relationship ust ind n rive y-d log hno tec e-commerce and Idaho’s ho’s duh’s wedding shows Ida awn LaF and WHEREAS, Kip and ; ges rria ma lthy hea to commitment ary food of cooked steak as a prim WHEREAS, the prevalenceho’s beef industry; and group pays tribute to Ida s the erball dexterity emphasize WHEREAS, Napoleon’s teth cation in Idaho public schools; and edu l sica phy of importance

56

campus talk

|

november 2013

WHEREAS elections , the schoolwide P service anfoster an awarene reston High Scho ss o d civic du ty ; and in Idaho’s youth ol student body f public WHEREAS , th e “H appy Han candidate d s” s fo cl r u sc b an h the impo rtance of ool president prese d the requiremen theater art t n s in K-12 et a skit is an exam that WHEREAS ple of ducation; the positi , Pedro’s efforts to a n d relationshve connection be bake a cake for Su tween cu ips; and linary skill mmer illustrate s to lifelon g

ns, the the chickens with large talo WHEREAS, Tina the llama, eymoon Stallion showcase Idaho’s 4-H milk cows, and the Hon animal husbandry ; and tives or of the House of Representa WHEREAS, any membersture of the State of Idaho who choose isla Leg EAKIN’ the Senate of the current resolution are “FR to vote “Nay” on this con of having the “Worst Day of Their risk the IDIOTS!” and run Lives!”

Totally useless fact: The word ‘byte’ is a contraction of ‘by eight.’

idaho passes “napolean dynamite” bill

NOW, TH membersEREFORE, BE IT RES Fifty-eigh of the First RegulaOLVED by the Represen th Idaho Legislatu r Session 7 of the therein, thtatives and the 8 Sre, the House of Hess and at we commend enate concurring the positi the City 9 of Prest Jared and Jerusha culture, e ve aspects of Idah on for showcasing prosperityducation system, ao’s youth, rural thletics, e and divers conomic ity.

BE IT FUR T H E R R E SOLVED th of the Ho of the Sta use of Representa at we, the memb te o f Id a ho, advocatives and the Senaers your heart cinematic , and thus we eag te always followinte e undertaki g ng of Idahrly await the next o’s Hess fa mily.

BE IT FUR the HouseTHER RESOLVED th hereby au of Representative at the Chief Clerk copy of th thorized and dire s be, and she is of Hess, the is resolution to Jacted to forward a Principal Mayor of the City red and Jerusha of Preston of High Sch Preston and the ool.

S

TAT E NT OF PU RS 15E2M RPOSE 36

Purpose o commen f this resolution is cinematicd Jared and Jerush to recognize and the nation talents by which a Hess for their th ’s awaren ess of Ida ey have increased ho.

FISCAL NOTE

“ I l i k e yo

u r s le e ve

There is no fiscal impact to the general fund.

s .”

Contact Name: Representative Larry Bradford Representative Max Black Phone: (208) 332-1000 STATEMENT OF PURPOSE/FISCAL NOTE HCR 29

Totally useless fact: The word ‘pixel’ is a contraction of either ‘picture cell’ or ‘picture element’.

campus talk

|

november 2013

57

THE AWFUL RESULT OF TOO MUCH FREE TIME

by John Scheck

Thinking

Out

Loud While in Exile in Spain Unsolicited Advice from the Spanish Grandmother You Never Had

Not everyone had an abuela who taught them how to cook. I wouldn’t say that I’m a close second to having a Spanish granny but I’m all you got.

When making gazpacho, don’t even think of skimping on the olive oil.

Leave that low-fat nonsense for some other wimpy dish you have planned.

As a matter of fact, this goes for just about every Mediterranean recipe so just turn the bottle upside down and let it pour.

Why Not Drink Wine?

Looking in my medicine cabinet it dawned on me that the off-brand mouthwash I have costs as much as a decent bottle of Spanish table wine. I’m not really smart enough to come to any meaningful conclusions on this observation but it seems like this should mean something. A glass of wine is almost always cheaper than a bottle of water in a café and I am smart enough to order wine instead of water, even if I just have to take an asprin.

58

campus talk

|

november 2013

To Cook or To Kebab?

If you find yourself watching cooking videos at 7 a.m. on a Saturday, you’re probably going to spend a bit of time in the kitchen later in the day ... or maybe you’ll just get a kebab from the shop on the corner instead ... and by “you” I mean “I.” Keeping Things in Perspective There is a traffic light on the street in front of my apartment. For the longest time, just about every time I was held up waiting for the light to change in my favor, I would curse this bit of lost time and wonder about the things that I could have accomplished but didn’t because I was stuck waiting for the stupid light. Finally I timed the changes: 30 seconds for pedestrians and one minute for cars. Just knowing that only one minute was the very longest my wait would be has made all the difference. Dude, it’s one minute; even I can wait one minute.

More About Food I have gone from just buying plants that take a long time to die to actually being able to grow things on my small patio. I’d like to start farming some vegetables on a country plot as some friends of mine do. I like the idea of having a closer relationship to what I eat, at least as far as that is possible. I don’t plan on raising chickens in my stairwell, so relax neighbors.

Comb Your Hair and Tuck in Your Shirt One disadvantage to living in a city is that with just a step out your door, life can be painfully, sometimes embarrassingly public. I just took out a load of trash looking like a total slob who slept on a park bench (not a bad look for me).

In the gauntlet of 25 meters between the front door of my building and the trash container I have to pass a supermarket and a bus stop and usually a lot of people. Believe me when I tell you that it’s very possible to be under-dressed for a trip to the dumpster.

Totally useless fact: Lightning strikes the Earth about 6,000 times per minute.

primitive living

what to do when the internet is down

Totally useless fact: The first hard drive available for the Apple ][ had a capacity of 5 megabytes.

campus talk

|

november 2013

59

hahahaha

Remember to

send all jokes funny@mycampus talk.com and you could win a Campus Talk t-shirt.

Q: Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?

A: So she wouldn’t wake up the sleeping pills.

NEW SUPER BUFFET 1 adult buffet, 1 large drink, & 5 wings

ONLY $9.99

BUY 1

ADULT BUFFET GET THE

SECOND 1/2 OFF WITH PURCHASE OF 2 LARGE DRINKS

60

campus talk

|

november 2013

Two blondes had driven cross-country to visit Disney Land. When they got within a mile, they saw a sign that said: Disney Land Left. The blonde driver thought for a moment, then turned around and started driving back home.

A blonde with two red ears went to her doctor. The doctor asked her what had had happened to her ears?

“I was ironing a shirt and the phone rang, but instead of picking up the phone I accidentally picked up the iron and stuck it to my ear.” “Oh Dear!” the doctor exclaimed in disbelief. “But what happened to your other ear?”

“The person called back.”

How can a pregnant woman tell that she’s carrying a future attorney? She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

A blonde went to the doctor for a routine checkup.

After looking her over and conducting a few tests, the doctor said, “I have some news for you… you’re pregnant!” The blonde thought for a moment and asked, “Is it mine?”

“Daddy, how was I born?” asked a curious son. “Ah, very well,” said the father. “You need to find out anyway! Mom and Dad got together in a chat room on MSN. Dad set up a date via e-mail with your Mom, and we met at a cyber cafe. We snuck into a secluded room, and then your mother downloaded from your dad’s memory stick. As soon as dad was ready for an upload, it was discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall. Since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later the blessed virus appeared. And that’s the story, son.”

Totally useless fact: Like humans, cats and dogs are either right or left handed (pawed).

A

date

signed

presented by

lthough your plus-size lifestyle has come to be accepted in modern society, to the point that special clothing stores have been created to cater solely to those of heavier sorts, you strive to squeeze yourself into clothes that wouldn’t have even fit you when you were a child. Like a sausage shoved into its casing, every bump, roll and crevice is revealed as you strut your blubbery way down the street. With tiny dog in purse and purse in hand, you command all onlookers’ attention, oblivious to the fact that they aren’t staring at you because you’re hot, they are staring at you because your ever-bouncing carousel of skin and fat has hypnotized them and, thankfully as a result, prevented the massvomiting response applicable to such a sight.

This award is presented to:

Award 2012

Way Too Tight Clothes Wearer

CONGRATULATIONS

charted 100 80 60 %

40

what I want to do all day

20 0 bang on the drum

work

10

time spent in seconds

8

6

time spent when a pop-up ad comes up

4

2

0 LOOKING AT AN AD

FINDING THE ‘X’ BUTTON

WINNERS OF MISS UNIVERSE EVERY

HOW MANY

MOST SOME A LITTLE ALMOST NONE EARTH

62

campus talk

|

november 2013

REST OF THE UNIVERSE

Totally useless fact: The muzzle of a lion is like a fingerprint - no two lions have the same pattern of whiskers.

charted

BREAKING THE SOUND BARRIER

HOW FAST YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING VS. ACTUAL SPEED PERCIEVED

OMFG SLOW DOWN

ACTUAL

Changing Futures.

One Person At A Time Donate Plasma and Save a Life Today

SPEED LIMIT

10 UNDER THE LIMIT

BARELY MOVING TEENAGER

ADULT

GRANDMA

100 80 60

%

TIME spent ON GOOGLE EARTH

Please help us help those coping with rare, chronic, genetic diseases.

New donors can receive $100 this week!

40

Ask about our Specialty Programs!

20

Must be 18 years or older, have valid I.D. along with proof of SS# and local residency.

0 SCHOOL RESEARCH

100 80 60 40

GENERAL RESEARCH

FINDING YOUR HOUSE

Walk-ins Welcome.

NOW OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK!

LIKLIHOOD OF YOU KNOWING THE ANSWER TO THE $1,000,000 QUESTION

Book your appointment online at Biotestplasma.com today!

Biotest Plasma Center 1112 N. Main Street

20

Gainesville, FL 32601 352-378-9431

0 WHEN YOU’RE IN THE HOT SEAT

WHEN YOU’RE THE PHONE A FRIEND

WHEN YOU’RE WATCHING AT HOME

Totally useless fact: The first word spoken by an ape in the movie Planet004-Campus-Tallk-3.8583x10.0394.indd of the Apes was “Smile”.

www.biotestplasma.com

1

campus talk

|

november 2013 4/25/13 63 1:42 PM

spotted!

OLD BOY

Spot The Differences

November 27, 2013

S IE

Josh Brolin, Elizabeth Olsen, Samuel L. Jackson

T H

G I N

l C m IBU

p & MAL 9 omORGAN r f y TAIN M a d s AP C e , dn IRNOFF e W SM G y N r TURI e v E FEA

D A L 64

campus talk

|

november 2013

g n i os

Ladies 21 and up with a valid college ID drink free. Includes all well liquors, featured call brands, house wine, & Miller draft.

Open every day 11am - 2am 3950 Archer Rd. | Gainesville, Fl 352.371.0818 |

Totally useless fact: The Mongol emperor Genghis Khanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s original name was Temujin.

Totally useless fact: A pigâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s penis is shaped like a corkscrew.

campus talk

|

november 2013

65

1) Woman in background missing, 2) Gravestone appeared, 3) rat on right has appeared, 4) Trunk key hole is missing , 5) Trunk handle on right is missing, 6) GLove appeared, 7) Guy's collar has changed, 8) Trunk has tear in back, 9) Guy has hat

LIST

CHECK

spotted!

game on!

Sore Thumbs

By Daniel Sutphin

Watch Dogs PC PS4 PS3 Xbox 360 Wii U November 22 Players take the role of Aiden Pearce, a hacker and former thug. Pearce’s criminal past has caught up with him leading to a violent hazily tragedy. Blending cutting-edge technologies and sophisticated game design into a realistic and living open world, the actionadventure game was designed by a team of industry veterans from franchises like Assassin’s Creed, Rainbow 6 and Far Cry. To survive, players must use any means at their disposal to take down a corrupt system with the ability to monitor and hack all who surround you by manipulating everything connected to the city’s network.

66

campus talk

|

november 2013

Killzone: Shadow Fall PS4 November 14 Guerrilla Games first release on the Playstation 4 platform, the latest Killzone installment drops players back on the battlefields of the insane shooter franchise. Killzone: Shadow Fall picks up 30 years after Killzone 3. Amid an era of interplanetary colonization, the first-person shooter details a conflict between the Vektans and the Helghast, two rival colonist factions living on a distant planet that have been living side by side for three decades on separate sides of a security wall. As Lucas Kellan, a member of the military intelligence unit known as the Shadow Marshals, players must try to protect the peace that exists with missions ranging from quiet infiltrations to all-out combat.

Super Mario 3D World Wii U November 22 Mario returns in a new 3-D world where players must work together to compete for the crown in the first multiplayer 3D Mario game for the Wii U console. Play as Mario, Luigi, Princess Peach or Toad for the first time since Super Mario 2 – and this time, they can play as all of these characters together. Each character possesses unique abilities and play styles – Princess Peach glides over gaps, while Luigi has his extra-high jump. Use these skills while exploring 3D environments filled with obstacles and contraptions like transparent pipes and vertical conveyor belts.

Nintendo is also introducing a new cat transformation, allowing players to run on all fours, pounce on enemies, attack in midair or use their claws to scamper up walls and goal poles.

The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds 3DS November 22 The first game made only for the Nintendo 3DS, The Legend of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds pits Link in a daring adventure in Hyrule, where he can use his new ability to become a “drawing” and move along walls of dungeons. The new feature allows players to explore and puzzle elements that provide access to locations that were otherwise unreachable.

Totally useless fact: Spot, Data’s cat on “Star Trek: The Next Generation,” was played by six different cats.

3700 W UNIVERSITY AVE. GAINESVILLE

LOOKING FOR THE FRESHEST SEAFOOD? BALLYHOO GRILL IS THE PLACE FOR YOU!

We serve the freshest seafood, steaks, oysters, and sushi. We prepare everything from scratch from our salad dressings to our award-winning soups.

352-373-0059

www.ballyhooGrill.com HAPPY HOUR 2-7PM THURS-MON & ALL DAY TUES & WED

WATCH THE GATORS AND YOUR FAVORITE NFL TEAM IN HI-DEF ON ONE OF OUR 15, NEW BIG SCREEN TVS

Totally useless fact: St. Paul, Minnesota was originally called Pigs Eye after a man who ran a saloon there.

campus talk

|

november 2013

67

Music Reviews

Tune In Turn On Plug In

By Daniel Sutphin

Cage the Elephant Melophobia On their third LP, Kentucky’s Cage the Elephant kicks off strong with driving piano’s and fuzz-laden guitar and bass on “Spiderhead.”

Although they still combine the sounds from the first two albums – ‘60s garage rock, ‘70s punk, and a blend of The Pixies influence – the band continues to hone in on their own unique sound on this record.

“Come A Little Closer” keeps the album rolling with a more moderate, indie-feel, similar to the Silversun Pickups. They follow that with the mellow, but catchy, third track “Telescope.”“Black Widow” hits hard and heavy later in the album, bringing horns into the mix and driving choruses.

Overall, the album feels reminiscent of bands from the past, but with a newer, unique twist that sets Cage the Elephant above many other bands in their genre.

68

campus talk

|

november 2013

Kings of Leon Mechanical Bull Kings of Leon return from a brief hiatus with Mechanical Bull. Said to be a return to their earlier records, before”Use Somebody.” On this go-around, the Followill’s signature sound is prominent in all the tracks. The first single, “Supersoaker,” kicks off the LP with a straightforward, upbeat feel, catchy vocals and their mix of clean and crisp guitars, drums and bass. They get a little fuzzier with the guitars on track “Don’t Matter,” bringing about a more garage sound. The song is catchy and another standout. The flow of the album is a little sporadic, jumping from slow to fast.

“Family Tree” stands strong in the mix, with a dirty-blues influence on the guitars and feel.

Despite its shaky start, the album rounds out well with the upbeat and driving, “Coming Back Again,” and the mellow and catchy “On the Chin.”

Blind Boys of Alabama I’ll Find a Way No surprises on “I’ll Find a Way” from the Blind Boys of Alabama, but with some music, surprise is not always a benefit.

The new album from the group spans blues, gospel, New Orleans blues on “I Am Not Waiting Anymore” and country blues with the prominent steel guitar and feel of “I Shall Not Be Moved.” The 70-year-old gospel group teamed with Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon. The album features guests including Vernon himself, Merrill Garbus of Tune-Yards, Sam Amidon, Patty Griffin, Shara Worden of My Brightest Diamond and Casey Dienel of White Hinterland.

London Grammar If You Wait With vocals reminiscent to that of Florence from Florence and the Mahcines, electronic music band London Grammar released their first LP, “If You Wait.”

Despite the similarities in vocals, musically London Grammar is far-less a machine and more of a slow-moving stream of airy, wet sounds and textures, with small driving moments interlaced with mellow, ambient stretches of vocals and background tones. The album starts strong with “Hey Now” – a perfect representation of their sound – and stays in its safety zone for the most part of the album.

Other standouts include, “Metal & Dust” and “Stay Awake.”

Haim Days Are Gone An obvious product of the late ‘80s and ‘90s musical influence, Haim intertwines throwback sounds and tones spanning the better part of pop artists for both decades.

With close harmonies, funky, low-mixed guitar, well-placed synth and a blatant pop polish, “Days Are Gone” expands on a previously released 2012 EP, “Forever.” The first single “The Wire” is straightforward, with a more minimal approach to the music, resembling the production on Vampire Weekend’s “Dying Young.”

Despite this stripped, retro-approach, the airy vocals, although strong for the most part, teeter too far into the modern pop approach often using autotune effects to accentuate parts where it is not needed. “Forever” stands as one of the strongest tracks on an overall solid album, with catchy vocals, light staccato guitar work and basic drums balanced with a slew of clicks and sounds to round them out.

Totally useless fact: Horses cannot vomit. Neither can rabbits.

one liners!

p u k c Pi s e n i L

e n o f o e l a c On a s , how a c i r e m A to ou free are y tonight? e Dairy You be th d I ’ll be Quee n a n e r Ki n g : g r u B r u o y me You treat I ’ll do rig ht, a nd y. it you r wa

be t s u m You earl from P , Harbor e becaus you’re baby, mb. the bo

I don’t know what Quidditch position you play, but you sure look like a keeper!

I’m not tr ying to impress you or anything, but...

I’m Batman !

Baby, you are so fine I could put you on a plate and sop you up with a biscuit.

Totally useless fact: Pocahontas appeared on the back of the $20 bill in 1875.

NOW WITH

MORE

GROUP FITNESS

MORE AMENITIES MORE FOR YOU MEMBERSHIPS AS LOW AS

$9.99 A MONTH

BAILEYSGYM.COM

AMENITIES . 24 Hour Access . Boxing . Cardiovascular Training . Indoor Cycling Classes . Group Fitness Classes . Massage Therapy #MA63175

. Personal Training . Pro Shop . Sauna . Smoothie Bar . Strength Training . Tanning * club amenities vary at each location

352-373-4439 3441 W. University Ave. | Corner of University & 34th

campus talk

|

november 2013

69

SEASON OF SOBER?

Alcohol Troubleshooting

by Kelly Herman

70

Symptom

Fault

Solution

Feet cold and wet

Glass held at wrong angle

Rotate glass so open part faces upward

Feet warm and wet

Bladder control error

Find house pet and complain about potty training

Beverage light and tasteless

Beverage does not exist

Make another one

Wall in front of you covered in lights

You’ve fallen on your back

Attach malfunctioning body to nearest stable structure

Mouth full of carpet

You’ve fallen forward

See above

Beverage tasteless, front of shirt wet

Hand to face positioning error

Get a straw

Floor blurry

You’re looking through bottom of glass

Fill glass with beverage immediately

Floor moving

You’re being carried

Find out if you’re being taken to another place with alcohol

Room suddenly dark

Party has shut down

Confirm sleeping arrangements with host

Ride home suddenly feels like cruise ship

Alcohol limit has been exceeded

Lean out of nearest window

Other guests are looking up at you

You’re dancing on a table

Remove heels, or fall toward most crowded portion of audience

Beverage is clear and tasteless

Someone is trying to sober you up

Punch them

Face and body hurts, mind unusually clear

You’ve been in a fight

Apologize to all near you just in case

Don’t recognize anyone

You’re at the wrong party

See if they have free alcohol

Don’t recognize room

You’re at the wrong party

See if they have free alcohol

Singing sounds poor

Not enough alcohol has been consumed

Drink until voice improves

Don’t remember some words to the song

Premium alcohol intake has been achieved

Moonwalk

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: A donkey will sink in quicksand but a mule won’t.

Totally useless fact: Reindeer milk has more fat than cow milk.

campus talk

|

november 2013

71

r o f e c r u o s r You ! e s i d n a h c r e logo m

WWW.WHATSHAPPENING PROMOTIONS.COM

352-371-5881

PART OF

Totally useless fact: The â&#x20AC;&#x153;L.L.â&#x20AC;? in L.L. Bean stands for Leon Leonwood.

campus talk

|

november 2013

73

CATERING WE DO IT! (OPEN UNTIL MIDNIGHT OR LATER!)

CAMPUS

3412 W University Ave 352.672.6654

74

campus talk

|

november 2013

WE DELIVER! BFAMOUS2GO.COM

DELIVERY FEE s NO HIDDEN FEES MUST BE PLACED ONLINE AT BFAMOUS GO COM

Totally useless fact: Hugh â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ward Cleaverâ&#x20AC;? Beaumont was an ordained minister.

Totally useless fact: The Old English word for “sneeze” is “fneosan.”

campus talk

|

november 2013

75

A P P LY TO D AY @ E STAT E S G A I N E SV I L L E . CO M

NOW LEASING FOR FALL 2014 come by & tour today

fully furnished + 24hr fitness center + private bed & bathrooms + pet friendly + free tanning

ăĆĂċćĊĂċāăāăŏđŏăĆĂĈŏ ŏĂĀ0$ŏ 2!

Totally useless fact: Alexander the Great was an epileptic.

campus talk

|

november 2013

77

WINGS, BEER, & NOW BRICK OVEN PIZZA

BY THE SLICE!

4"-5:%0(4"-00/ $0. t 8 6/*7 "7& 78

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Woodpecker scalps, porpoise teeth and giraffe tails have all been used as money.

you sooooo cheated

S R E W ANS

CR OS SWORD

WORD HUNT!

R E B M E V O N

SUDOKU

star map

MEGA MAZE

SNOWFL AKES

even exchange

fear knot!

GO FIGURE

Totally useless fact: Octopi have gardens.

CRYPTO QUOTE

QUIP{

whereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s frank?

campus talk

|

november 2013

79

hahahaha

A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll serve you, but donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t start anything.â&#x20AC;?

Remember to

send all jokes funny@mycampus talk.com and you could win a Campus Talk t-shirt.

During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password: Mickey-MinniePluto- Huey-Louie-DeweyDonald-Goofy. When asked why such a big password, she said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;It had to be at least 8 characters long.â&#x20AC;?

Why isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Mexico in the Olympics? Because every Mexican athlete that could swim, jump, and sprint already crossed the border.

Q: What type of school teaches you how to make ice cream?

A: Sundae school!

A man was recovering from surgery when a nurse asked him how he was feeling. The man replied, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m alright, but I didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t like the FOUR-LETTER WORD the doctor used in surgery.â&#x20AC;? The nurse asked, â&#x20AC;&#x153;What did he sayâ&#x20AC;??â&#x20AC;&#x153;OOPS!!!â&#x20AC;?

Q: What did the big chimney say to the small chimney?

A: Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re too little to smoke.

Q: How do you make a bandstand?

A: Take away their chairs!

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve lost my electron.â&#x20AC;? The other says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Are you sure?â&#x20AC;? The first replies, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yes, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m positive...â&#x20AC;?

WE DELIVER! PITAPIT2GO.COM DELIVERY FEE s NO HIDDEN FEES MUST BE PLACED ONLINE AT PITAPIT GO COM

CAMPUS

1702 W University Ave 352.692.4400

80

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Strengthsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is the longest word in the English language with just one vowel.

looking after yourself

Top

10

Reasons to Get Tested for HIV

Before Going Back to College You may be infected and not know it. According to the CDC about 1 in 4 (26 percent) of all new HIV infections is among youth ages 13 to 24 years. Additionally, 60 percent of youth with the virus do not know they are infected and therefore do not receive treatment. People who have the virus can feel, look and act just as healthy as people who don’t have it. The only way to know for sure is to be tested for HIV.

The CDC recommends testing.

Overall, the CDC estimates that 20 million new sexually transmitted infections occur each year, half among 15 to 24-year-olds. And as part of its efforts to ensure that more people know their status and get tested for HIV, the CDC recommends routine HIV testing of all adults and adolescents and pregnant women in health care settings in the U.S. Being tested for HIV is quick and easy. For the first time ever, you can test yourself in the privacy of your own dorm room with the OraQuick® In-Home HIV Test, the over the counter rapid test that tests oral fluid, giving you results in 20 minutes – less time than it takes to pick up a late night pizza!

Also, many health clinics offer confidential HIV testing. Do not be afraid to utilize the health services your college has to offer.

Testing yourself can influence your friends to do the same.

The atmosphere of college life brings excitement and new experiences, but negative peer pressure to make unhealthy choices is abundant. Testing yourself could be the first step to influence a friend to test.

Create a chain reaction!

If you test HIV negative, you can take steps to stay negative.

Getting tested for HIV is the only way to confirm if you are negative. Knowing that you are negative means that you are not infected and can take steps to stay that way! It is important to learn about ways to reduce or eliminate your risk of infection in the future.

Early treatment means you can celebrate more of life’s milestones.

If you are HIV positive, getting connected to care early can save your life. People with HIV and AIDS are living longer, healthier lives today, thanks to new and effective treatments. Getting tested and connected to a doctor or healthcare professional can help you get the treatment you need to live a long life.

Knowing your status protects you and your partners. The increase in sexual activity on college campuses can lead to higher rates of STD and HIV infections.

By educating yourself about HIV, you are doing the right thing to protect your health and the health of those around you. If you are HIV positive, practicing safe sex techniques can save your partner’s life. If you are negative, practicing safe sex techniques will help you both stay negative.

You may have been exposed to HIV without knowing it. HIV is transmitted from person to person during activities, such as sex or needle sharing, where contact with blood, semen or vaginal fluids can occur.

You can make a difference in the global fight against HIV. Currently, more than 34 million people around the world are estimated to have HIV/AIDS, and many of them do not know they are infected, because they have never been tested. By getting tested for HIV and learning your status, you are doing your part in the fight against HIV.

Knowing your status helps you make smarter decisions.

Knowledge is power on a college campus. Each year an estimated 400,000 students between the ages of 18 and 24 have unprotected sex. By knowing that you are HIV negative, you can take steps to protect yourself and minimize risks so you stay negative. If you learn that you are HIV positive, you can seek treatment, stay healthy longer and improve your current health.

Totally useless fact: Stalin’s left foot had webbed toes, and his left arm is noticeably shorter than his right.

campus talk

|

november 2013

81

the right stuff What about study guides?

When you (the professor) set up a test, you have to make sure the problems are of a certain “type.” They have to be doable in the time allotted and the right level of difficulty, and often there aren’t a lot of choices that fall into those categories, so you, the student, will wind up seeing problems that were very similar to those in the study guide. Often, if you can see what kinds of questions are in the review, you can get an idea of what the test will look like.

Interview by Sarah G. Mason

Professor Jeremy Hyman has what every new college student wants – an insider’s take on how to succeed. In his new book “The Secrets of College Success,” authors Lynn F. Jacobs and Hyman discuss the ins and outs of college life from the eyes of a professor. Today, Hyman shares a bit of his invaluable advice.

The Secrets of College

Success What is the main idea behind “The Secrets of College Success”?

It seems as though students don’t really know what their professors are thinking. We thought, “If students only understood what their professors were thinking, then they could succeed in college.” The book is filled with “Top 10” lists and provides information that students can start using from the very first day of college. If you’re further along in college, the new edition has many more tips for the last two years of college.

What are some misconceptions that students have when entering college?

One misconception is that the professor wants to see you do badly. In fact, most professors would like to see their students do well. Another common misconception is that students believe the professors will hold their hand, remind them of deadlines and hunt them down if they don’t turn in assignments on time. Especially for those students who had this hand-holding in high school, they really come to expect it. When you get to college, however, this just isn’t the case. campus talk

|

november 2013

Being a college professor with sometimes hundreds of students, how do you reach out to each of them?

The main way professors reach out to students is through the graded work and, sometimes, through the long and elaborate comments professors will leave on papers or tests. Especially in larger schools, this is one of the few times a student will have a one-to-one interaction with the professor.

Sometimes, students just take the comments and throw them out, which is really unfortunate because they’ve really thrown out the chance to read a direct evaluation of their own work and have a chance to improve.

Why is it beneficial for students to attend exam reviews hosted by professors?

Usually, the professor has just made up the actual test. When you (the professor) have the test in your mind, no matter how hard you try, you wind up dropping hints about what’s going to be on the test. You might say, “One kind of thing I might put on this test is …”

For students, that can be extremely helpful.

What kind of grades should students expect to make?

At most schools, the average is a B+. When you make a C, that means you really haven’t learned a lot in the class. In fact, in some classes, the professors are under pressure to make sure no more than 30 percent are C’s.

That means if you get a C, you’re in the bottom 30 percent.

By the way, when picking a major, if possible, you should not pick a major that you’re getting a lot of C’s in. No matter how much you would like to do something, if you always get low grades it’s like getting kicked in the face after every class. Who can have pride in that kind of environment?

Speaking of picking a major, what advice do you have for students on choosing the right one?

We think you should take two advanced courses before you pick a major. If you take a few upper division courses in that particular realm of interest, you can see what you’re getting yourself into before you commit.

The other thing – and this is more difficult – is that students are picking majors with an idea of the career that will follow. It used to be that you’d have a degree in humanities or whatever and you’d think, “Well, I’ll develop a range of skills that will allow me to choose between several jobs when I graduate.” Now that’s not so much the case; there’s a more one-to-one match when it comes to majors and future careers.

For new students in a big school, how can they find their niche?

One way would be to join an interest group, like a sorority, an outdoors group, a service group or a church. Having even a few friends can make the college experience look different. The other thing is that it’s easy to get lost, but I think the secret is to find small groups that you can participate in. For instance, say you’re in a large lecture. If you can find even a couple of people to talk to about the class material or to walk to class with, that can really give you a sense of belonging. Whatever problems you’re having in a class, just remember that there are many other people who are having those same problems.

Totally useless fact: Some carnivores, rodents, bats and insectivores have a penis bone, called a baculum.

Action Twerk!

d in h e B n a m o w t n u The St

” l r i G l i a F k “Twer

Daphne

Avalon

Interviewed By Daniel Sutphin

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Every time you lick a stamp, you consume 1/10 of a calorie.

Action Twerk!

It didn’t take long for the “WORST Twerk Fail Ever – Girl Catches Fire” video to go viral on YouTube. It also didn’t take long for the rumors of it being a hoax to surface. Those rumors were confirmed on “Jimmy Kimmel Live” when Kimmel interviewed the “Twerk Fail Girl,” revealing her to actually be working Hollywood actress and stuntwoman, Daphne Avalon.

Daphne may have never twerked before, but she had already seen some Hollywood action, including a part in “Glee” and her lead role in the newest “Call of Duty” commercial. CT caught up with Daphne to discuss the making of “Worst Twerk Fail Ever,” the popularity that has followed, her work with stunt group, Blue 8, and what she plans to do next.

How was the idea for the prank video conceived?

I was not involved in that process. I was just brought in to do stunts and acting for it.

How did you prepare yourself for the video?

I was OK to go flying through a table, I’d already been set on fire before. The only part I wasn’t ready for was the twerking! I had to teach myself off of YouTube videos, and I had a few friends help me out with that [laughs].

Did you think it would take off as much as it did?

I’d hoped that it would. We shot it back in June, and I remember at the end of the day, we played back the last take and we were laughing our heads off. I don’t think you can have expectations for anything to go viral.

You can just have hopes for it, but I think it exceeded any hopes or dreams that I had for it.

According to the clip on Jimmy Kimmel, you were sworn to secrecy to do the prank.

How frustrating was it to see all the media coverage and everyone going nuts over it?

It was a little frustrating, and the hardest part was not responding to friends, because to me, it was a little rude to be ignoring them all weekend. I think the payout and responses after we did the reveal were worth it.

What was it like working with Jimmy?

It was amazing, he’s a really funny guy. I was horrified, almost petrified, to be on a live show, but I think I felt comfortable working next to him because he’s so good at what he does.

Have you noticed any ways in which it’s helped your career as a stuntwoman or actress?

It’s too soon to tell, I think. I don’t have any definite answers for that, but it has opened up opportunities for me to meet with agents, theatrical or commercial, when I wouldn’t have been on their radar before, so they definitely put me on the map. I’ve got the twerk video behind me and I’ve done a live show, so I definitely think it’ll help me. Who can tell how much it will? But it also gave me recognition in the stunt community. It was such a public stunt that they know they can hire me to go smashing through things and set me on fire.

Totally useless fact: The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.

As a stuntwoman, what’s the craziest thing you’ve had to do?

I was in the Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 surprise live-action trailer, which came out around last October. They did it in front of a blue screen, but on the CGI, I was on a white horse and I ended up jumping on a helicopter in that trailer. That was really cool because Robert Downey Jr. was in that commercial and Guy Ritchie directed it, so that was an insane job to get. I’d only been in the industry for under a year at that point.

What was it like filming the commercial?

It was crazy. You have to get cleared by the director, there’s also people who have the concept for the commercial, and there’s also the client, so there’s a bunch of different levels to get cleared under. It was a very high-end project. I’ve never seen a bigger blue screen in my life than I did for that commercial. And they have a behind-the-scenes video where you can see what it was like to make it.

What other projects are you doing?

In the next few months I should be hosting the online training facilities for the stunt group I train with called the Blue 8 Stunt Group – we all train together, and basically everyone in the group has a specific niche. We’ve got parkour, military and tactical training, kung fu, ballet and yoga. One of the really important things about movies these days is the art of motion, and that’s something we really focus on. We’re working on making this training more public, via online, and eventually physical training facilities.

What do you have to do, in general, to maintain your craft?

Everyone does their own training schedule.

The idea behind being a stunt person is the idea that you can do everything. I do all the stuff I mentioned for the Blue 8, but I also take Tae Kwon Do with Simon Rhee, who’s a legendary stunt coordinator. I’ll take gymnastics classes, and I also train in Pilates just to stay fit. I’m also a horse trainer, and I specialize in horse jumping.

What are your long term goals?

I like stunts, but I think my ideal would be doing some action acting. That would probably be the angle for this. campus talk

|

november 2013

WHO STASHED THE CANDY?

flicks By daniel sutphin

The Wolf of Wall Street WHAT: Biography/Crime/Drama WHO: Leonardo DiCaprio, P.J.

Byrne, Jon Favreau WHEN: November 15 Based on a true story, director Martin Scorsese’s “The Wolf of Wall Street” depicts the life of Jordan Belfort (DiCaprio). The film follows Belfort’s rise to a wealthy stockbroker living the high life to his fall involving crime, corruption and the federal government.

e Scan th

e coed e the

to s trailer!

Ender’s Game The Hunger Games: Catching Fire Thor: The Dark World WHAT: Action/Adventure/Fantasy WHO: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie

Portman, Christopher Eccleston WHEN: November 8 Thor (Hemsworth) embarks on a perilous journey to take on an enemy that even Odin and Asgard cannot withstand. On the mission, he will reunite with Jane Foster (Portman) and be forced to sacrifice everything to save the world. campus talk

|

november 2013

WHAT: Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi WHO: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh

Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth

WHEN: November 22

The Hunger Games returns to find Katniss Everdeen home and safe after winning the 74th Annual Hunger Games along with fellow tribute Peeta Mellark.

While on their “Victor’s Tour” of the districts, Katniss senses a rebellion on the rise, but the Capitol is still very much in control as President Snow prepares the 75th Annual Hunger Games (The Quarter Quell).

WHAT: Action/Adventure/Sci-Fi WHO: Asa Butterfield,

Abigail Breslin, Harrison Ford WHEN: November 1 After being devastated twice by an alien race called the Buggers, the people of Earth remain banded together to prevent their own annihilation from the superior alien species. Ender Wiggin, a quiet but intelligent boy, is separated from his sister and his terrifying brother and brought to battle school in orbit around earth. With the potential to become the savior of Earth, Ender is tested and honed into an empathetic killer who begins to despise himself as he learns to fight.

Delivery Man WHAT: Comedy WHO: Vince Vaughn,

Chris Pratt, Cobie Smulders WHEN: November 22 Vince Vaughn plays an affable underachiever who learns he’s fathered 533 children through anonymous donations to a fertility clinic 20 years ago.

Trouble ensues when 142 of them file a lawsuit to reveal his identity and he must decide whether or not to come forward.

Totally useless fact: A barnacle has the largest penis of any other animal in the world in relation to its size.

rent me!

Man of Steel WHAT: Action, Adventure, Fantasy, Sci-Fi WHO: Henry Cavill, Michael Shannon, Amy Adams, Russell Crowe WHEN: November 12 Director Zack Snyder (Watchmen and 300) helms this age-old, action-hero flick. With hopes to finally do the story justice, Warner Bros. also brought on Christopher Nolan as a producer. In this retelling, a child is sent to Earth from a dying planet. He is adopted by a couple in Kansas.

As he ages, he must learn to come to terms with his special abilities and learn how to use and control them in a world that will not be able to understand such powers. His abilities come in handy, however, when he must defend the planet against members of his alien race.

Small

Screen

Red 2 WHAT: Comedy, Crime, Thriller WHO: Bruce Willis, Anthony

Hopkins, John Malkovich, Helen Mirren WHEN: November 26 In this action-comedy sequel, retired black-ops CIA agent Frank Moses reunites his unlikely team of elite operatives for a global quest to track down a missing portable nuclear device. In the process, the team must take on an army of assassins, terrorists and power-crazed government officials all hunting the same weapon.

Prince Avalanche WHAT: Comedy/Drama WHO: Paul Rudd, Emile Hirsch,

Lance LeGault WHEN: November 12 Taking place in the summer of 1988, two highway road workers leave their city life to work an isolated landscape. The environment becomes a place of misadventure as the two find themselves at odds with each other and the women they left in the city.

Girl Most Likely

Parkland

WHAT: Comedy WHO: Kristen Wiig,

WHAT: Drama WHO: Zac Efron, Tom Welling,

Annette Bening, Matt Dillon WHEN: November 5 After both her career and relationship hit the skids, failed New York playwright, Imogene (Wiig), is forced to move back home to New Jersey with her eccentric mother and younger brother. Just to further her humiliation, she returns to find a strange man sleeping in her old bedroom and an even stranger man sleeping in her mother’s bed. Imogene must realize that as part of her rebuilding process, she must learn to accept her family and her Jersey roots.

Totally useless fact: During conscription for WWII, there were nine documented cases of men with three testicles.

James Badge Dale WHEN: November 5 Parkland recounts the perspectives of a handful of ordinary people who, due to the events that occurred in Dallas, Texas on November 22, 1963, were thrown into extraordinary circumstances. It follows the lives and reactions of the young doctors and nurses at Parkland Hospital, Dallas’ chief of the Secret Service, an unwitting cameraman, the FBI agents who nearly had the gunman within their grasp, the brother of Lee Harvey Oswald and JFK’s security team. campus talk

|

november 2013

joke!

Two guys were taking Chemistry at the University of Mississippi. They did pretty well on all of the quizzes, midterms and labs. These two friends were so confident going into the final that the weekend before finals week (even though the Chemistry final was on Monday), they decided to go up to the University of Tennessee and party with some friends.

They had a great time, however, with hangovers and everything, they overslept all day Sunday and didn’t make it back to Mississippi until early Monday morning.

Rather than taking the final then, they found their professor after the final to explain to him why they missed the final.

They told him that they went up to the University of Tennessee for the weekend, and had planned to come back in time to study, but that they had a flat tire on the way back, and didn’t have a spare, and couldn’t get help for a long time, so they were late in getting back to campus. The professor thought this over and told them they could make up the final on the following day. The two guys were elated and relieved. They studied that night and went in the next day for the final.

The professor placed them in separate rooms, and handed each of them a test booklet and told them to begin. They looked at the first problem, which was worth five points. It was something simple about Molarity & Solutions.

“Cool ,” they thought. “This is going to be easy.”

They did that problem and turned the page.

They were not prepared, however, for what they saw on this page.

It said, “(95 Points) Which tire?”

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Starfish don’t have brains.

-

7).'34/0 #/

SAUCED AND TOSSED IN YOUR CHOICE OF 10 DELICIOUS WING FLAVORS! WINGSTOP IS THE ULTIMATE CHOICE FOR YOUR GAME WATCHING AND TAILGATE PARTIES! TM

THE WING EXPERTS

#!,, !(%!$ s 37 4( !6%.5% '!).%36),,% &,

-),% 7%34 /& 37 4( 342%%4 /. 37 4( !6%.5% Totally useless fact: To survive, every bird must eat at least half its own weight in food each day.

campus talk

|

november 2013

89

how manly are you?

MAN UP! : t s e T n The MMorae Than Just s e l c s u M g n i x e Fl

90

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: Russian composer, Sergei Prokofiev composed an opera, The Giant, at the age of seven years old.

how manly are you?

In our modern, technological society, it’s not uncommon for an adult male to have, um, “overlooked,” and/or “missed out,” on many of the common skills associated with traditional “manliness.”

Author Robert Dodenhoff breaks down many of those skills in an ultimate test of manhood. Never mind sports stats and useless action movie facts, in “The Man Test,” Dodenhoff challenges your knowledge with real categories that make a man, from finance and negotiation to etiquette and domestic skills.

You can find this test and more when you pick up “The Man Test” at Amazon.com for $12.99.

2) D. 10–70 1) C. Visiting companies and talking with supervisors and employees. A great résumé is obviously an important tool, but face-to-face meetings are far more effective in gaining career opportunities. As much as 80 percent of all job openings are filled through (direct and indirect) referrals, not through job postings.

Answer Key:

Totally useless fact: The monarch butterfly’s sense of taste is about 12,000 times more sensitive than a human’s.

3) D. 2–6 months

3) How long can you expect to search before you get a job?

A) 1–3 days B) 4–10 days C) 2–4 weeks D) 2–6 months

5) When an interviewer asks, “What are your weaknesses?” you should: A) Spin a negative into a positive, e.g., “I work constantly, even at home.”

B) Avoid answering it and just mention a few of your strengths.

C) Be honest and try not to avoid answering the question.

7) The interviewer asks, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” You should: A) Impress him with your determination by saying that you’d like to own a company like his.

B) Reveal your intentions by stating you’d like your boss’s job.

C) Talk in general terms about excelling at your job so you’ll be considered for new opportunities.

D) Reveal your long-term goal about working in a different industry.

4) A, D. Do you have any disabilities?

What race are you? It is permissible though to inquire about your physical ability to perform a particular job function, e.g. stacking heavy boxes.

2) How many companies does the average person typically visit before landing a job?

A) 1–3 B) 4–6 C) 7–9 D) 10–70

4) Which question(s) are illegal for the company to ask you in an interview?

A) Do you have any disabilities?

B) What is your greatest strength?

C) What is your fiveyear goal?

D) What race are you?

5) C. Be honest and try not to avoid answering the question. If you’re dodging a question, you may come across as being shifty or disingenuous.

Be honest about your challenges, and use some examples about how you’ve managed to work on them.

1) Which is the most effective way of getting a job?

A) S ending résumés to companies using school recruiting offices.

B) Answering newspaper ads, and using job agencies.

C) Visiting companies and talking with supervisors and employees.

6) B. Summarize your strong points.

Asking questions about the other candidate will only make you look weak and insecure.

Job Hun ting

6) The interviewer states that he’s narrowed his decision on giving this job to you, or one other candidate. What’s the best way to handle this?

A) Ask details about the other person so you can compare.

B) Summarize your strong points.

C) Ask to be interviewed along with him or her in the same room.

7) C. Talk in general terms about excelling at your job so you’ll be considered for new opportunities. It’s okay to have aspirations such as wanting a job promotion, but this is no place to be cocky by exclaiming that you’d like to own their business!

The Man Test:

campus talk

|

november 2013

91

GET THESE IN YOUR LIFE By daniel stuphin

Booq Complete Protection Kit for the Samsung Galaxy S4 booq: Viper courier

Capable of housing all of your creative and personal essentials, the Viper Courier is a minimalist laptop bag designed with a natural fiber exterior that is waterproof and organically dyed for a smooth yet rugged feel. The interior is lined with lightweight, durable nylon fabric, and a densely padded laptop compartment for maximum protection. It is fitted with pockets, specifically sized to fit an iPad, two pens, and a large zippered pocket for documents, magazines, and business cards. A large exterior pocket also provides storage for a smart phone, as well as other accessories.

With so much reliance on smart phone devices these days, it’s important to protect them potential damage. Booq’s complete protection kit for the Samsung Galaxy S4 offers a long-lasting and lightweight all-in-one solution for their device. Made up of four parts, the Kit provides a scratch-resistant tempered glass screen protector, an ultra-thin and lightweight snap case, a microfiber cleaning cloth and two adhesive phone covers. $34.95 www.booqbags.com

$99.95–$109.95 www.booqbags.com

Satechi Smart Travel Router & Adapter Satechi’s Smart Travel Router & Adapter features a compact, cube design, and four of the most common plug configurations able to fit electrical outlets in over 150 countries including US, Canada, China and most countries in Europe. Whether studying abroad or just on holiday, the accessory serves as a router able to convert a direct internet connection from a hotel or conference room into a private connection. It is also able to improve and extend the range of any existing Wi-Fi connection up to 100 feet.

id America: TouchTone Aimed at the cost-conscious music lover, TouchTone brings high-fidelity sound and features intuitive touch control and built in mic for hands-free calls. Soft coating and smooth, rounded edges make it easy to take on-the-go, offering 4 hours of battery life and up to 33 feet of wireless range. $79.95 www.idamericany.com

$44.99 Satechi.net 92

campus talk

|

november 2013

Totally useless fact: A lead pencil is good for about 50,000 words.

GET THESE IN YOUR LIFE

ADOPTED: Leather Folio for iPhone 5s Designed with a Full-grain leather exterior, the ADOPTED Leather Folio case opens up to reveal a soft, suede interior, as well as an integrated card pocket. The exterior protects front, back, and sides of phone, while the interior protects the phoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s display with a snap-on installation that offers full access to all buttons and ports.

ADOPTED: Cushion Wrap iPhone 5ÂŽ Case

Designed using delicate stain-resistant silicone upholstery, the ADOPTED Cushion Wrap Case provides cushion for maximum comfort and wear. The outer panels are designed from soft-grip silicone, allowing for protection while still providing open access to all buttons and ports combined with easy clip-on installation. $49.95 www.getadopted.com

$59.95 www.getadopted.com

Findables: FlexStand for iPhone 5

Scosche: boltBOX

Embedded with a unique scannable code, the Findables FlexStand instantly connect social profiles. The app-powered case allows for easy connection with new friends without having to search for them, allowing you to share professional information, such as your company website, portfolio and LinkedIn. The FlexStand case folds into a stand to comfortably view pictures and videos. $29.95 www.findables.me

A solution to the tangled mess of device chords, the Scosche Boltbox provides a colorful and retractable charge and sync solution. The 3-foot cord is housed in a sleek enclosure the size of a small matchbox that fits easily into any pocket, purse, or luggage case.

It comes in blue, green, pink, red, black, and white to add style and personality to mobile devices. The magnetic locking connector easily extends and retracts by pulling both ends simultaneously.

Outdoor Tech: Buckshot

Fully wireless and portable, the Buckshot wirelessly connects with your phone, tablet, laptop or any other Bluetooth-enabled device and streams crystal clear audio for a range of up to 32 feet for 10 hours on a single charge.

It includes a built-in speakerphone and microphone for hands-free calls and is designed with a rugged, rubberized exterior for shock and dust resistance. $49.95 www.outdoortech.com

Ballistic: Hydra Delivering maximum drop protection in a slim form, the Hydra is a pocketable waterproof and dust-proof case for the iPhone 5. It exceeds IP-68 standards and can be submerged in water up to 7 feet and for up to 30 minutes. It comes with easy-toaccess port covers, waterproof meshes, and delivers rugged high-impact protection against falls up to 8 feet. $80 www.goballisticcase.com

$24.99 scosche.com Totally useless fact: Sixty cows can produce a ton of milk a day.

campus talk

|

november 2013

93

lower F s

The only thing thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll die faster than your relationship

Powered by GRU • Gator.net Gainesville’s Only All-Fiber-Optic Network

ALL INCLUSIVE STUDENT SUITES WITH A TOUCH OF Luxury.

We'd love for you and your friends to call us home! We can offer signing specials, guaranteed roommate matching, and furnished or unfurnished options.

Call to tour today.

Only Community with 4 Interior Bus Stops Gainesville’s Biggest Clubhouse Basketball and Tennis Courts Resort-Style Pool 24 Hour Fitness Center 8-Station Computer Lab 1 Mile Running Trail Astro Turf Field Stand Up & Lay Down Tanning Beds Putting Green Sand Volleyball 352.271.3131 | GainesvillePlace.com | 2800 SW 35th Place | Gainesville, FL 32608