Moxie Magazine - February 2021

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AN UNEXPECTED FAIRYTALE BLACK HISTORY MONTH GO RED FOR WOMEN

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February 2021

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FROM THE PUBLISHER

February

to-do list PRACTICE KINDNESS BE THANKFUL BREATHE DEEPLY ENJOY LIFE LOVE

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F

ebruary is here and love is in the air!

The days are getting longer, spring is on the horizon, and the promise of closing the long, sad chapter on COVID is slowly transitioning from a distant hope to a potential late-summer reality.

This month at Moxie Magazine is all about HEART—and our team is excited to bring you an edition full of it. Beginning with Black History Month, which is always time for celebration and reflection, but this Black History Month we have the added joy of celebrating the inauguration of the first WOMAN OF COLOR as Vice President of the United States.

women of all ages (and of course those who love those women)! Learn 10 ways that you can Go Red! this February and join us at the virtual event on Thursday, February 4th from noon to 1 p.m.

All this with an unexpected love story, fantastic ideas for Valentine’s Day, and delicious Creole dishes to celebrate Mardi Gras—you’re bound to find a few pieces we know you will love.

Stay warm!

We also Go Red! with the American Heart Association’s Go Red for Women. This edition is packed full of great information for

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contents

TO GO FOR WOMEN 28 1RED0 WAYS

HEART HEALTH

UNEXPECTED 10 ANFAIRYTALE

6 | Yoga for Heart Health

24 | Heart Awareness to Save Your Life

Sponsored by the American Heart Association

28 | 10 Ways To Go Red For Women

LOVE 10 | An Unexpected Fairytale

22 | Your Choice: Hearts & Candy or Darts & Revenge 36 | I Love to Be in Love

LIFESTYLE

8 | I Want to Help, But How?

14 | On That Note: Why History Matters 16 | The Makings of Community by Pest Pros MI 32 | Eating Disorder Awareness Month 34 | Book Review: The One-in-a-Million Boy

WHY HISTORY MATTERS

35 | Pantone’s 2021 Colors of the Year 40 | Don’t Sell Yourself Short

FOOD & DRINKS

ARDI GRAS 38 MMENU

12 | Restaurant Review: Lake Burger

18 | Local Sweet Treats for a Sweet Holiday 38 | Mardi Gras Menu

- Jambalaya

- Crawfish Pasta

- Beignets

THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE IT HAPPEN PUBLISHER: Heather Dombos hdombos@moxiemediagroup.net LAYOUT & DESIGN: Alicia Pauwels apauwels@moxiemediagroup.net EDITOR: Lalita Chemello lchemello@moxiemediagroup.net SALES & MARKETING: Holly Korhorn hkorhorn@moxiemediagroup.net

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Cricket Alexander Emily Betros Kim Carson Kristie Curier Kelly Duggan Rachel Kirtley Heidi McCrary Jenny Opdycke Dr. Marti Peters-Sparling Elizabeth Precopio

Hannah Reuter Marlita Walker Demarra D. West WEBSITE: moxiemediagroup.com

BY MAIL: Moxie Media Group, LLC P. O. Box 2284 Portage, MI 49081-2284

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February 2021

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FIVE HEART HEALTH YOGA BENEFITS

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Yoga for

Heart Health

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Y

oga can be dated back to 10,000 years ago in India, and has countless benefits—38 to be exact, according to the Yoga Journal. However, we have not given enough attention to the heart health benefits that it can provide. In fact, when you think of yoga you probably don’t think about heart health at all. You may have an image of a limber body engaged in challenging poses (called asanas), like a headstand, however yoga is so much more than asanas. And the movement associated with yoga isn’t where the majority of the benefits lie when it comes to heart health. It’s in the breath.

It is no secret that our heart is essential to our overall health. Studies show that yoga may help improve heart health and reduce several risk factors for heart disease. One study found that participants over 40 years of age who practiced yoga for five years had a lower blood pressure and pulse rate than those who didn’t. Another study followed 113 patients with heart disease, looking at the effects of a lifestyle change that included one year of yoga training combined with dietary modifications and stress management. Participants saw a 23% decrease in total cholesterol and a 26% reduction in “bad” LDL cholesterol.

Additionally, the progression of heart disease stopped in 47% of patients.

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One of the main reasons why yoga is good for your heart is because it can work wonders on high stress levels.

“Stress plays a very important role in heart disease and heart attacks,” says Dr. Pratiksha Gandhi, a Preventive Cardiologist and founder of the Global Foundation for Preventive Cardiology, a nonprofit heart health organization based in Los Angeles. “Before the heart attack, we have seen there’s often a stressful event,” that can serve as a trigger, she says.

Hopefully this article has inspired you to continue your heart health yoga practice, or start one. There are many accessible ways you can practice yoga these days - from YouTube to virtual classes - no matter your budget or practice level.

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Gets oxygen flowing. Yoga boosts levels of hemoglobin and red blood cells, which carry oxygen to the tissues. It also thins the blood by making platelets less sticky and by cutting the level of clot-promoting proteins in the blood. This can lead to a decrease in heart attacks and strokes since blood clots are often the cause of these killers.

Boosts immunity. When you contract and stretch muscles, move organs around, and come in and out of yoga postures, you increase the drainage of lymph (a viscous fluid rich in immune cells). This helps the lymphatic system fight infection, destroy cancerous cells and dispose of the toxic waste products of cellular functioning.

Increases your heart rate. Did you know that even yoga exercises that don’t get your heart rate up can improve cardiovascular conditioning? Studies have found that yoga practice lowers the resting heart rate, increases endurance, and can improve your maximum uptake of oxygen during exercise.

Lowers cortisol level. Excessive cortisol caused by acute and chronic stress has been linked with high blood pressure.

High stress is also a major contributing factor in heart disease. By practicing yoga, especially during high stress times, you are able to lower your cortisol level.

Lowers blood sugar. Yoga lowers blood sugar and LDL “bad” cholesterol and boosts HDL “good” cholesterol.

In people with diabetes, yoga has been found to lower blood sugar in several ways: by lowering cortisol and adrenaline levels, encouraging weight loss, and improving sensitivity to the effects of insulin. Get your blood sugar levels down and you decrease your risk of diabetic complications such as heart attack, kidney failure, and blindness.

Demarra D. West, MA, LPC, PCC, RYS Demarra is a certified yoga teacher, Reiki master, licensed therapist, and entrepreneur who has a deep passion for all things women and wellness. She is the founder of Be Well Beautiful Woman, a global platform created for women to heal, have abundant joy, and immense business success.

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I WANT TO HELP, BUT HOW? WAYS TO SUPPORT YOUR COMMUNITY

DONATE

There are a lot of ways to give to those who need it. Whether it be money, items, or food. You can always put your items in the donation clothes bins located in the parking lots of businesses. You can also hand it over to Goodwill or The Salvation Army. Though, these donation spots do not always give to those in your area who need it, as their reach is broader. If you want to support your own community’s needs, find a church, food pantry, or school who will give donations to those around you.

If you have a lot of stuff, try your hand at hosting a garage sale or reaching out to those who may need it. Or, if you’re crafty, use those extra scrap pieces to make winter items like mittens, hats, and scarves for the homeless in your area – they will appreciate it!

VOLUNTEER

There is an endless list of ways to volunteer, from organizations to just doing it on your own. One place to give your time to is shelters.

There are many different types including youth homes, women’s shelters, foster care,

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homeless shelters, and animal shelters. The majority of these are always in need for more helping hands. Joining an organization that hosts volunteering events is also a great way to get more into the community, and you can find ones near you at your library or online.

FUNDRAISE

Join a fundraiser or start your own, from a car wash, to a bake sale and beyond. Get your friends, family and community to join in to raise money for those less fortunate or for other local needs. Join forces with your neighborhood to market your cause too, because even though you are helping those who need it, you should not be afraid to ask for help yourself. A smaller way to do this is by using a fundraiser box and asking businesses to place it near their checkout for the spare change.

SHOP LOCAL

Ditch the big-box stores and shop small and local, owned by someone who is more than just a corporate entity. You can do this by purchasing your food at local grocers, farmers markets, food stands, and co-ops. You can also

purchase your personal accessories through artists at conventions, online shops, and other locally-owned businesses in your area.

FOSTER

This is not the easiest way to help, but there are thousands of children and animals (if you prefer) who need good homes while they await their forever home. In a world full of cruelty, choosing to open an extra bedroom to someone who doesn’t have their own is one of the biggest gifts you can give. If you are not quite ready for that step, renting a room out can also help someone who may have just lost their home. Sometimes, renting a cheap bedroom can be a real simple gesture to get someone back on their feet.

Hannah Reuter Hannah graduated from WMU in 2015 with a degree in Economics and currently resides in Portage. In her free time she enjoys strumming the guitar and painting. She is the author of two YA books under the pseudonym, H.B. Catherine. You can find information on her books and writing at hbcatherinewriting.com.

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An Unexpected Fairytale

BY KRISTIE CURIER

HAVE YOU EVER IMAGINED YOUR MARRIAGE PROPOSAL? Although I am

a rom-com obsessor—an admirer of love, and a daydreamer even in the loudest of rooms—I never did.

Growing up, nearly all romantic films and shows centered around white couples. It is hard to imagine being in the shoes of a straight-haired, long-legged, petite white woman with beloved Eurocentric features when you have tight coils, sun-kissed brown skin, a wide nose and shoes that bend and crease as you struggle to reach the top of any cabinet.

So, while I cried no matter how many times I had seen the male character chase down his seemingly slow-walking lover, I never felt like I could relate.

It’s not that I was pessimistic or felt undeserving of love, but the realities of the women around me didn’t reflect what

Hollywood considered a romantic fairytale, in more ways than one.

The 2010 U.S. Census data revealed that in 2009, 71% of Black women in America were unmarried. I was nine years old that year, and saw this statistic play out every day—at school, at church and even at home. Digging into that statistic requires more page space and a history lesson in forbidden Black love, from bondage to freedom.

Now, although the romantic realities I have painted for myself and other Black women appear scarce in a sense, there are still moments of light—and of romance. In the spirit of romance and all that is love and fairytales, there are moments that are sure to be rom-com-worthy.

My story? The third act of this rom-com that is my life was September 13, 2020: When my then boyfriend, for a little more than a year, asked me to be his wife. And leading

into that climatic moment, he had planned the most thought-out, charming and memorable five-day journey. It was something needed in a time when things looked so dark.

It may not be a fairytale I have seen on the screen or read in a novel, but it is my favorite one yet—one I had never imagined. Not just because of the moment, because of, in my case, the male lead of my story and life. Even while surrounded by the devastation that was 2020, we created love and positivity—all circumstances Black love is accustomed to.

As encouragement, my partner and I reflect on how BIPOC (Black, Indigenous and people of color) communities have continuously found ways to escape the atrocities of their circumstances through joyous moments with loved ones. As we continue living through history, don’t let guilt cloud or defeat your moments of happiness and love. And always, take a moment to celebrate your own unique love.

The journey to my fairytale DAY ONE DAY TWO

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DAY THREE

Daniel drives another few hours, pulling up at Ruby Falls in Chattanooga, TN. Another underground cavern, but this one with a jawdropping surprise—a waterfall half a mile in.

Who knew being 1,000+ feet underground could be this romantic? We then drove to Rock City, GA at the tippy top of the same ‘Lookout’ mountain and walked through an enthralling garden, where I tackled y fear of heights and walked over a swing bridge, holding his hand.

DAY FOUR

DAY FIVE

The proposal

We pull up to the jaw-dropping Biltmore Estate in Asheville, NC, fitting the theme of our history-filled trip. While I was intrigued by the tour of the Chateau-esque mansion, I was more anxious for the photoshoot Daniel told me he’d planned for us. I’d asked for us to do a couple’s photoshoot before, and it’s very like him to surprise me with a gift or experience I’d mentioned in passing...

Credit Tia Nicole Photography

Our photoshoot begins in the gardens of the Biltmore Estate. It’s intimate as our incredible photographer directs us into affectionate poses. What’s funny is I actually whisper to Daniel, “I bet this is what our wedding will

feel like,” as our lips barely touch & we lock eyes, thinking that moment would be years away. *Little did I know* we make our way from the garden to the front of the mansion...

Our photographer tells us to turn away from each other, close our eyes, then spin around—not unusual as she’d been having us move around the entire shoot. I’m getting my Zoolander on. Meanwhile, the best surprise of my life is right behind me. I spin around, immediately confused as to why I don’t see Daniel & why he’s not following instructions.

Then I look down...and, well, emotion overtook my words, but I can show you.

Kristie Curier

Credit Tia Nicole Photography

Kristie is an Executive Producer at a local news station in the KalamazooGrand Rapids market. Simply a storyteller at heart and a proclaimed writer since the first day she picked up a pen.

As a Black woman, she is most passionate about unmuting the stories of those who’ve felt silenced and overlooked for centuries.

February 2021

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RESTAURANT REVIEW |

PARMESAN TRUFFLE FRIES

CHOCOLATE SHAKE

Tuesday – Saturday: 11:00 AM – 7:30 PM | Closed Sunday & Monday 4404 West Main Street | Kalamazoo | www.eatlakeburger.com A few new burger joints have popped up in our area over the last few years, and although I have tried my way through a few, I had yet to make it to LAKE BURGER. I figured there was no time like the present!

Lake Burger’s menu appears simple. They offer mostly burgers, a variety of different kinds of fries, chicken sandwiches and shakes among other items. They also have a kid’s menu filled with kiddie-friendly classic foods like grilled cheese, hot dogs, and mac and cheese.

I decided to go classic for my first meal with them and ordered a Lake Burger, a Regular Fry and a Chocolate Shake. My husband opted for the Spicy Chicken Sandwich, Parmesan Truffle Fry and a Vanilla Shake.

The LAKE BURGER looked mouthwatering good. On the brioche bun was a pastureraised beef patty, lettuce, tomato, onion, pickle, American cheese—dressed with their burger sauce. I’m not sure what the burger sauce was, but its combination with the other ingredients was just perfect. The burger was a little messy to eat, but in the most delicious way possible.

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My order of the REGULAR FRY had golden and crispy fries, in an unbelievable amount! It seemed like a ton! The fries were topped with salt and parsley, which not only made them tastier, but made them look super appetizing.

The PARMESAN TRUFFLE FRY side was delicious! I feel I enjoyed them more than my fries, but so did my husband so he really did not love sharing more than a few with me (who could blame him?).

Lake Burger had a few other kinds of fries on their menu, like the Boardwalk Fry, a Cheese Fry and Crab Fry (it says with classic Old Boy), that I cannot wait to go back to try! I totally missed seeing the Boardwalk Fries (salt and vinegar) when I ordered. They are now at the top of my list for my next visit.

My husband really enjoyed his SPICY CHICKEN SANDWICH, which they offer a spicy AND regular option on their menu. The sandwich is house-seasoned farm chicken breast, topped with lettuce, pickles, pepper jack and ranch on a brioche bun. And note, my husband has

LAKE BURGER

tried many spicy chicken sandwiches from a variety of places—he considers himself a connoisseur of them—and he commented that Lake Burger’s Spicy Chicken Sandwich was by far the best.

Lastly, the SHAKES! They were great! I had added peanut butter to my chocolate shake—a tasty and wonderful addition!

Just enough to not overpower the chocolate. The shakes were both a nice, sweet treat to top off our meals.

I quite enjoyed Lake Burger. They were easy to order from and even easier to eat! I love that they source from local farms and they have a gluten-free bun option! They also offer specials throughout the week, including $5.00 burgers on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. You can place orders online or in store, and they also offer delivery through DoorDash.

Elizabeth Precopio Elizabeth Precopio is a hairstylist by day and 24/7 food enthusiast.

She visits restaurants in the Kalamazoo area and blogs about her experience at feedmekzoo.com

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ON THAT NOTE

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WHY HISTORY MATTERS Believing truth cannot be denied and reason can prevail over justice

BY LALITA CHEMELLO

The first day of my seventh grade social studies class, my teacher had pointed out a quote he had hanging up on the wall towards the back of the classroom. The quote read:

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

This quote, often misquoted as “doomed to repeat it,” was entirely fitting. What we would learn in that class…and many others before and after, would be a part of that lesson—gain the knowledge to move forward and learn from the mistakes made by others in the past. All to prevent the repeating.

It is crazy how applicable that is to today…

Last year was a stark reminder of how not understanding history, or not taking note of it, has created further problems today.

Bringing me to February.

BLACK HISTORY MONTH

Black history is not something we as a whole talk about—or recognize as much as we should. How often do we just note the month, let alone understand or celebrate it? And why do we continue to not fully embrace what that history is or what it means for Black Americans and America? Most of what we do, is not enough, if we do anything at all.

How do we begin to fix that? By learning more.

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HISTORY OF BLACK HISTORY

Black History Month, is fairly young in age, as it has only officially been around for 45 years.

Compared to the birth date of our nation, it feels to be a small fragment for something that has history extending well beyond that—and is incredibly significant on our country’s timeline.

However, celebrations for Black history began over 100 years before those 45 years. The Black community has continued to celebrate their freedom, emancipation, and even the birth dates of Abraham Lincoln and Frederick Douglass—both integral to the movement and success of the Emancipation Proclamation and Black rights.

It was a young Carter G. Woodson who would find the inspiration to designate a time to celebrate Black history following his attendance of the fiftieth celebration of emancipation in Illinois. In 1915, he would be one of the founders of the Association for the Study of Negro Life and History (ASNLH), now known as the Association for the Study of African American Life and History. The association was created as a way to raise awareness of African American’s contribution to the American civilization, with a mission in believing that truth could not be denied—that reason would prevail over justice.

In 1925, the idea of spending a week to educate and celebrate Black history was established…finally celebrated in February

1926. That week, fell in line with the birthdays of Lincoln and Douglass. Adding the extra few days to already-established celebrations, helped the week quickly catch on—inspiring the opening of Black history clubs across the country. The ASNLH would also help in creating materials for schools who requested more to teach their students.

In the mid-century, the push to expand what was at the time known as “Negro History Week,” grew. It would not be until the late ‘60s and into the ‘70s that the real push for an entire month would be met. It was 1976—the country’s bicentennial birthday, that Black History Month would come to be recognized nationally. President Gerald R. Ford asked Americans to “seize the opportunity to honor the too-often neglected accomplishments of Black Americans in every area of endeavor throughout our history.”

1976. For reference the Emancipation Proclamation was issued in 1863—meaning it took the nation 113 years to recognize and finally encourage celebration and education surrounding Black history.

TODAY: HAVE WE LEARNED?

Now fast-forward to 2020…44 years after that moment in history.

The Black Lives Matter movement takes hold of the country. The overall theme: not enough has been done. In some ways, it feels like

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It took the nation 113 years following the Emancipation Proclaimation to recognize and finally encourage celebration and education surrounding Black history.” really nothing has been done. It was a painful reminder that 160 years from the long overdue emancipation—despite a month dedicated to Black history; what we learned in schools; the events and clubs that continue to educate the youth and public; decades of protests, deaths, arrests, and the list goes on—we as a country still fail to understand.

We still have not learned. We still have not listened or changed.

The Capitol Riots in January were a further stark reminder of that lack of education… and how incredibly divided our country still remains. There was that disturbing dichotomy of the images of rebel flags waving inside the Capitol—the heart of our Constitution and country. And to see that flag wave over 160 years later within that sacred place…I couldn’t help but ask myself, “Have we not learned?”

I look at all of this—and know we can do more. We truly can as just ourselves. As a community. As a nation.

Does it mean we’ve done it and the barriers are broken and our work here is done? If you haven’t read the earlier part of this column, then to answer your question, no. We’re not even close. Though, I will say it is one of many steps needed as we head in the right direction of our future.

I do have to say, reading through all of the historical selections the Biden-Harris administration has made in terms of Cabinet members--is awe-inspiring. We’ll have individuals as first-time representatives of the LGBTQ+ community, and many selections to become first-time people of color representatives as well.

President Biden said, “Men, women, gay, straight, center, across the board, Black, white, Asian—It really matters that you look like the country because everyone brings a slightly different perspective.”And the diversity of his administration is really beginning to reflect what that should look like. Again, a step in the right direction.

MOVING FORWARD

But this is not the end. The Inauguration and the administration are pleasant reminders of where we could be as a country—how we should be as a country in embracing our brethren. Yet there is still oh so much we need to learn. So much we need to do.

On Inauguration Day 2021, you would have found me on my couch, watching, mesmerized—with tears pouring down my cheeks when the now Vice President Kamala Harris took her oath of office. My partner found me in tears and asked if I was okay—all I could muster was a tearful, “It’s a big day.”

LOOK TO THE PAST

I am not sure if I speak for everyone when I say this, but it was why the Inauguration on January 20th meant so much more than just another President taking his place at the White House.

Because it really was.

I recognize the historical significance of Vice President Harris saying those words. We now not only have the element of a first Madame Vice President—as she shatters the highest glass ceilings for women (just need President now…), but she is the first South Asian vice president, and the first Black vice president.

It brings me back to the quote in my social studies class—and how incredibly important it is to do our part to understand history, both recent and remote, so as not to rehash issues or nightmares of the past.

Some of the atrocities we saw in this last year were reminiscent of things that had happened long before days of the Civil War and emancipation. How do we prevent this? Education. Educating ourselves. Our children. Our neighbors, families and friends.

You don’t need to embark on a full-on celebration. But you can seek out ways to learn more and better us as a community— and as a nation.

Lalita Chemello Lalita is our Editor, Writer and occasional photog. Her 13 years of writing has landed features with Panorama, published poetry and even a short film. She spends any extra time she can quenching her wanderlustian needs by finding new places to adventure with her other half, writing, or playing with their motorized toys.

It’s why I emphasize Black History Month and the significance of its beginning, what it aimed for, and how it is really portrayed here in the U.S. We talk about this month to some capacity—maybe. But do we really learn from what is taught to us?

Do we seek education beyond just the little news stories or things our kids bring home from school?

February 2021

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PEST PROS OF M I C HI G AN BR I N G S YO U

The Makings of Community

BY ESHAH WILDER OF PEST PROS

W

e are all part of something larger than ourselves. In many cases, the people we surround ourselves with daily and overall in our lives are all essentially a part of our community.

SO, WHO IS IN YOUR COMMUNITY?

My community is family, friends, neighbors, coworkers, and a local coffee shop barista who knows that I am obsessed with sweet cream cold brews, even though it is winter in Michigan. I feel truly blessed to have them all. And I find joy in walking into many of my favorite local restaurants or breweries, just to find myself instantly greeted by a familiar face.

At the end of the day, community is all about connection. Connection is so important when engaging in community. I enjoy being a part of groups that support my interests and provide me a small sense of “oh my gosh, they get it!� I feel this connection when I’m trading stories and survival tips at the kindergarten mom group made up of a diverse group of

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moms. We are all learning, whether we are first-time moms or maybe third-time moms, like myself.

However small or large your community is, the power lies in the varied perspectives and in knowledge sharing. Sharing your life experiences creates an opportunity to build a deeper connection and allows people to learn more about you. I love this and have found much joy in this aspect of community. It may be uncomfortable at first, but I can guarantee you will find someone who will listen and enjoy the same amazing feeling.

Mostly, I love when I can help connect others, because it gives me a unique energy and sense of gratitude. Whether it is finding a local contractor, chiropractor, service company, or date night idea, I am happy to help. I love helping take some of the burden off people trying to figure out who will be a good fit for them to work with or where to go. This is where personal experience is very impactful and I am glad to be able to offer this to my community.

Most of us have seen our local community come together time and time again to lift one another up, to share and support, celebrate successes, overcome challenges and give back. Even the smallest thing can make a difference!

I would like to encourage this amazing community of women to continue to challenge one another, to give grace when needed, love and support each other and the community surrounding us.

Shop local, give local, become a mentor! Volunteer, join a neighborhood organization, attend a local event, have fun, grow your personal community and be blessed!

Eshah Wilder Eshah, Commercial Operations Manager and Community Connector for Pest Pros of Michigan, has an infectious personality and is naturally adept at making lasting connections with people. She is actively involved in the networking scene and is passionate about supporting people.

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THE KALAMAZOO FOODIE

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Sweet Treats Sweet Holiday

LOCAL FOR A

The past year has pushed everyone to really think outside of the box to keep their businesses going strong—and Kalamazoo businesses are no exception.

I am in absolute awe on how much talent we have

boasts a gorgeous bouquet of flowers and boxes of assorted chocolates, this year I wanted to find some of the most unique options from some amazing local places around Kalamazoo.

Rachel Kirtley

here. With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, their creativity and talents really show in these delicious treats! While Valentine’s day typically

Lauren’s Sweet Creations laurenssweetcreations@gmail.com fb.com/laurensweetcreations

“

Rachel has worked in all levels of the food industry for over a decade. She is currently a Social Media Influencer, Content Creator and Restaurant Reviewer.

You can visit her at thekalamazoofoodie.com

I guess it started back when I was tall enough to reach the stove! My mom would always go out of her way to make everything from scratch, I found it so fascinating. Obviously, I always had to pull up a chair and watch her, and she would show me everything. As soon as culinary classes became available to me in high school, I was taking the EFE classes. That is also where I took all my ServSafe training. I started Lauren’s Sweet Creations back in 2018 just as a food blog. People wanted to buy my products, so I started selling as an in-home baker under the Michigan Cottage Food Law. Cooking and baking just comes natural to me and I love to do it! The best part about being in this business is being able to serve the community and seeing people enjoy MY product, it’s such an incredible feeling! But all-in-all, you can say I’ve been baking and creating for about 15 years.”

– LAUREN AKINS For Valentine’s Day, Lauren has created an absolutely stunning fruit bouquet that puts any box store to shame. She put together a beautiful arrangement of chocolate-covered strawberries, pineapple, and other fruits. With each arrangement you will have the option to have some of the fruit candy coated, or leave them plain. You will also be able to customize the fruits and candy-coated colors as they are available to Lauren. Contact her for orders!

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THE KALAMAZOO FOODIE

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“

LOCAL SWEET TREATS FOR A SWEET HOLIDAY VerHage’s Farm Market & Bakery at the Mill

8619 West ML Ave, Kalamazoo verhagesfruitfarmandcidermill.com/valentines-day

The farm was founded by my grandfather, Vern VerHage in 1962, and that same year his wife, my grandmother, Nancy VerHage, started the Cider Mill and the family’s apple cider mill is still famous from her secret blend of apples today! Vern and Nancy are no longer with us, but their children, my mom Kelly Mallory and my uncle Kevin VerHage, run the farm with myself and daughter Lily, and someday Madeline. I’ve been making caramel apples there since I was 14 years old for every fall season, but after my job at Welch’s in 2011 cut back, I’ve been there in a more full-time capacity. That is the year we started going back to the farmers markets and began expanding what we offer food wise in our Farm Market & Bakery. I attended culinary school at Grand Rapids Community College and graduated with a management degree in 2001. In 2011 we started baking and creating a menu called ‘From the Field to the Kitchen’ recipes. Three years ago, we built the new Farm Market & Bakery building and also at the same time we started making a more fancy donut! But I’ve had the idea for the donut bouquets for a few years now...honestly, they came up when we were Googling stacked bloody marys! We were having a private party at our lake house and saw the craziest items stacked on bloody mary glasses which led to more Googling and we found those sodas and milkshakes stacked with cake...and we thought of these donut bouquets! I feel like we never tried them because our business is seasonal, but with all the craziness of this year and a new ‘norm’ or ‘interest’ in pre-ordering and picking up stuff for what you’d like to have this year gives us the perfect opportunity to market the Donut Bouquet this year!”

- MEGAN MALLORY VerHage Fruit Farms special Donut bouquet for Valentine’s Day is so amazing even Homer Simpson would be envious of it. If you have ever had their baked goods or donuts, you know how delicious they are!

Bouquets can be ordered in advance with pick up taking place on February 12th – 14th. There will be personal selections made on each ordered bouquet to make it special for each recipient! There will be a vast selection of flavors including Red Velvet, Devils Food, Apple Cinnamon, Rich Buttermilk, Cherry, Blueberry & Cherry, all decorated and topped. Choices of toppings will include glazes, sugars, icings. and decorations. The middle donuts of bouquet will be stuffed donuts with decadent toppings and there will be a special three-donut wand as well. But you will be able to customize toppings for your donut bouquet from chocolate, salted caramel, to turtle cheesecake. Other donut flavors will be assorted, but flavors chosen by the bouquet buyer!

Beautifully packaged homemade fudge will also be available. If this isn’t thinking outside the box, I don’t know what is! Email vfmbakery@gmail.com to order your bouquets and other gifts.

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LOCAL SWEET TREATS FOR A SWEET HOLIDAY Schultz’s Treat Street 3023 Oakland Drive, Kalamazoo www.schultzsweets.com

Schultz’s Treat Street has really stepped up their treat game now that Erin and her husband officially made the transition to owners. They have re-vamped their menu and done some remodeling, but have kept the charming mural on the wall to keep the nostalgia of the original Treat Street. While Schultz’s Treat Street will have their everyday sweet treats for Valentine’s Day, Erin’s visionary creations never cease to amaze me. She will be offering a Flourless Chocolate Cake with Chantilly cream and a raspberry drizzle, individual cheesecake cups with a praline pecan graham crust with fresh strawberry compote topped with a chocolate-covered strawberry. Here is where her creative juices really flow – Erin will be making Red Velvet and Bacon Truffles! She will also be offering boxed Red Velvet Caramels and Raspberry Cheesecake Fudge, and a “couples” Red Velvet Hot Cocoa Bomb. Bigger than your average cocoa bomb, this one is made special for Valentine’s Day and enough for two people.

If you didn’t already know, Erin is famous for her amazing caramels, and her Giant Chocolate Turtles are my absolute favorite. If that wasn’t enough to tempt your taste buds, Schultz’s Treat Street has a super unique Ice Cream Sundae Kit that includes several flavors of ice cream, sauces and toppings, and will be offering Strawberry and Cream Soda Kits – perfect to celebrate Valentine’s Day with the kiddos or keep it to yourself.

Valentine’s Day might still look a little different from last year (as everything has), but Kalamazoo has rallied together to stay creative and interesting through it. Let’s continue to support our local businesses! You can also stay updated on anything local or Valentine’s Day-related in my foodie group on Facebook: www.fb.com/groups/thekalamazoofoodie

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YOUR CHOICE

Hearts & Candy OR Darts & Revenge

BY JEFF MURPHY, Mediation Services of Southwest Michigan

T

he month of February, the home of Valentine’s Day, bombards us with images of hearts, candy, flowers and promises of eternal love. But for many, Valentine’s Day is nothing more than a reminder of love lost, broken relationships and on-going arguments with the ex over kids and child support. Unfortunately, some feel the best way to handle their personal anger is to get into a long, drawn-out, ugly court match. The desire for revenge totally blocks out the real need for calm reasoning and common sense.

In reality, a divorce proceeding is not really a good place for revenge, especially where children are involved. When a person uses a divorce battle to satisfy their anger, the only real winners in the situation are the attorneys. The children are the real losers.

The money spent on lengthy court battles eats away at the marital estate—taking away the financial resources needed to survive after the divorce.

However, it doesn’t have to be this way.

Divorce Mediation offers an alternative to all of this. A trained mediator can

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diffuse anger and concentrate on the real future needs, instead of simply rehashing the past. It offers an effective and highly successful process where both parties can vent their anger and grievances in private without bringing children into it, and results in an agreement that you have created—not a judgment forced on you by a judge or lawyer.

fight there. The court decides what will happen – not you.

One effective mediation technique is to have the couple imagine the conversation between their children at high school graduation about how they had raised them after the divorce. Did they put the kids first and develop an effective parenting plan? Or did they simply use them as pawns in their personal battles? It can be a sobering exercise.

The benefit of mediation is that the venting is done in a private setting without the extreme tension and expense of a public court fight. The process helps them go forward to create a better working relationship for their future and the future of their children.

The mediation process helps the divorcing couple work out a parenting plan that will work best for them, and most importantly, for their children. Statistics have shown that parenting plans worked out in a mediated divorce have a much higher compliance rate than those imposed by a court – which will happen if you take the

When working with couples in mediations where the anger and tension is high, it is important to provide a controlled way for them to express their emotions so they feel that they have been heard. Both parties must have the sense that they have had the chance to vent their grievances.

If you are considering getting a divorce, think about using mediation – it can create a better future for you and your children.

Jeff Murphy is an attorney and mediator with over 35 years of experience in business, divorce, family law and corporate legal matters. His practice, Mediation Services of Southwest Michigan, has served clients throughout southwest Michigan and Grand Rapids for the past 15 years. For more information on mediation and how it can work for you, visit www.JeffMurphyMediator.com.

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Heart Awareness to Save Your Life L

inda Mankin injured her knee in 2015, and while getting treatment, she asked the doctor about pain she was having in her jaw. The doctor thought maybe it was TMJ-related and referred her to a dentist to be examined. But the pain continued, so Linda was sent to another medical care provider who then treated her jaw pain with medication.

But this was merely the beginning of Linda’s journey. The pain persisted. She would spend the next few years visiting eight different professionals for tests and assessments to try and determine the origin of the pain. At some point she would see a neurologist who determined the pain was coming from her spine—with pinching between her C5 and C6 vertebrae. These particular vertebrae provide flexibility and support to much of the neck and the head.

Treatment and medication Linda’s spine only slowed her jaw pain for a few days, rather than the months she had expected.

Another doctor would give Linda an EKG. The tests indicated her veins looked healthy.

She said, “I was 70 and they told me I had the veins of a 40-year-old.”

She may have had youthful veins, but she was still left without answers for the pain.

In the meantime, she found ways to manage the pain, for instance, “If the pain got too bad, I learned to tilt my head back a bit with my jaw up in the air and I would get some relief,” she said. “But if I was walking down a flight of stairs, looking down could make the pain worse.”

She eventually underwent spinal surgery and went to a pain management clinic afterward.

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Medication designed to last months, lasted only days before the pain returned.

Nearly four years later, March 2019, the jaw and headache pain were so bad, Linda’s husband encouraged her to go to the emergency room. After a 12-lead EKG, the staff asked what she would like to do for further treatment.

“I thought, you better not be telling me I’m having a heart attack!”

Go Red for Women campaign. Chest pain or discomfort is caused when your heart muscle doesn’t get enough oxygen-rich blood. It may feel like pressure or squeezing in your chest. The discomfort can also occur in your shoulders, arms, neck, jaw, or back. Angina pain may even feel like indigestion. And in cases like Linda’s, early medical tests may not even detect a heart condition.

With further testing it was revealed Linda had three blocked cardiac arteries at 100%, 90% and 70%.

Linda was taken by ambulance to Ascension Borgess for surgery.

Dr. Vishal Gupta, MD, an Interventional Cardiology Specialist with Ascension Borgess in Kalamazoo, led the team for Linda’s first angioplasty. Unfortunately, there were complications. Repairs in only one artery were completed, and she was then placed in an induced coma for her body to recover, where she remained for three days. In May of that year, Dr. Gupta attempted to repair another artery & was successful.

Since recovering, Linda has been able to continue working at her family business, Corky’s Drive-in, but at a slower pace than prior to her surgeries. She is constantly working to lower work-related stress.

Linda’s story is one not heard often.

Jaw pain, like Linda’s, is one of the cardiac indicators highlighted by the American Heart Association’s

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American Heart Association created Go Red For Women: a passionate, social initiative designed to empower women to take charge of their heart health.

What is Go Red for Women?

In 2004, the American Heart Association faced a challenge. Cardiovascular disease claimed the lives of nearly 500,000 American women each year, and women did not have enough or any education to detect the early—or any warning signs regarding heart disease. In fact, many dismiss it as an older man’s disease. To dispel the myths and raise awareness of heart disease and stroke as the number one killer of women, the American Heart Association created Go Red For Women: a passionate, social initiative designed to empower women to take charge of their heart health.

The campaign has worked to educate our community that a heart condition in a woman most likely will not look like it does in a man. As with men, a women’s most common heart attack symptom is chest pain or discomfort, but women are somewhat more likely than men to experience some other common symptoms, particularly shortness of breath, nausea/vomiting, back pain, or like in Linda’s story…jaw pain.

In Southwest Michigan, the American Heart Association has been working with the medical community and area women to spread the message that heart disease is not just a man’s disease and that nearly 80% of cardiac events can be prevented with diet, exercise and healthy living.

This year the association will host the GO RED FOR WOMEN DIGITAL EXPERIENCE on Thursday, February 4th from noon until 1 p.m. Chaired locally by Tish Anderson, Senior Director of Operations, Healthcare Systems, for Stryker, the event will

highlight area survivors, have a medical moment from Ascension Borgess and others, and include a silent auction. It is one of the largest women’s events in Southwest Michigan.

Pritchett-Evans with State Farm. Media sponsors include WOTV4 Women, FM 106.5 and Moxie Magazine. To register, go to HEART.ORG/KALAMAZOOGORED. This year, there is no charge to attend.

The Go Red for Women event is sponsored nationally by CVS Health and locally presented by Ascension Borgess, with other sponsors including Bell’s Brewery, PNC Bank and Sabrina

And wear your red Friday, February 5th, for National Wear Red Day, as part of the Go Red for Women initiative. Share with us your red by posting your photos to social media with the hashtag: #SWMIGOESRED.

DON’T SMOKE, EXERCISE, DRINK CAFFEINATED BEVERAGES OR ALCOHOL WITHIN 30 MINUTES OF MEASUREMENT.

TAKE AT LEAST TWO READINGS 1 MIN. APART IN MORNING BEFORE TAKING MEDICATIONS, AND IN EVENING BEFORE DINNER. RECORD ALL RESULTS.

REST IN A CHAIR FOR AT LEAST 5 MINUTES WITH YOUR LEFT ARM RESTING COMFORTABLY ON A FLAT SURFACE AT HEART LEVEL. SIT CALMLY AND DON’T TALK.

USE PROPERLY CALIBRATED AND VALIDATED INSTRUMENT. CHECK THE CUFF SIZE AND FIT.

PLACE THE BOTTOM OF THE CUFF ABOVE THE BEND OF THE ELBOW.

MAKE SURE YOU’RE RELAXED. SIT STILL IN A CHAIR WITH YOUR FEET FLAT ON THE FLOOR WITH YOUR BACK STRAIGHT AND SUPPORTED.

GoRedForWomen.org

American Heart Association recommended blood pressure levels BLOOD PRESSURE CATEGORY

SYSTOLIC mm Hg (upper number)

DIASTOLIC mm Hg (lower number)

NORMAL

LESS THAN 120

and

LESS THAN 80

ELEVATED

120-129

and

LESS THAN 80

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE (HYPERTENSION) STAGE 1 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE (HYPERTENSION) STAGE 2

130-139

or

80-89

140 OR HIGHER

OR

90 OR HIGHER

HYPERTENSIVE CRISIS

(consult your doctor immediately)

HIGHER THAN 180 and/or

HIGHER THAN 120

BLOOD PRESSURE HIGHER THAN 180/120 mm Hg IS A CRISIS. *

* Wait a few minutes and take blood pressure again.

If it's still high, contact your doctor immediately.

LEARN MORE AT HEART.ORG/HBP

©2017, American Heart Association. TM Go Red trademark of AHA, Red Dress trademark of DHHS. 11/17DS12894

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WAYS TO GO RED FOR WOMEN

Go Red For Women is the American Heart Association’s national call for women to take charge of their health.

It’s designed to help you recognize and reduce your risk for heart disease.

Research shows heart attacks are on the rise in younger women and new data from a study recently published in Circulation suggests younger generations of women, Generation Z and Millennials, are less likely to be aware of their greatest health threat, including knowing the warning signs of heart attacks and strokes.

Even modest changes to diet and lifestyle can lower risk by as much as 80 percent. That’s why it’s important for all women to take charge of their heart health and encourage others to do the same.

1

Make a date (and keep it).

Each year on your birthday, schedule a checkup. Know your blood pressure, cholesterol and glucose levels and ask your doctor to help you reach or maintain a healthy weight.

2

Tone up as you tune in.

Step, march or jog in place for at least 15 minutes a day while you’re watching television. Increase your activity by 5 minutes each week until you’re getting at least 30 minutes on most days of the week.

3 Grab some H2O when you go.

Take a water bottle with you wherever you go. You can get plenty of water and the bottle’s weight will strengthen your arm.

4

Keep out of sight, out of mouth.

Put raw veggies and fruits in front in the refrigerator. Keep healthy snacks in the front of the pantry, so that’s what you see first. If you choose healthy food regularly, you’ll soon make them a habit.

5 Eat right to control cholesterol.

Foods high in saturated fat and trans-fat can contribute to high cholesterol. Help keep your cholesterol down by eating foods low in saturated fat, such as lean beef, chicken or turkey (roasted or baked, with skin removed), fruits and veggies, low-fat or fat-free dairy products and whole grains. Consider using water or low-sodium broth as you cook or sauté in place of oil.

6 Shake the salt habit.

Help lower high blood pressure by watching your salt intake. Often, you’ll find it disguised in food labels as sodium alginate, sodium sulfite, sodium caseinate, disodium phosphate, sodium benzoate, sodium hydroxide, monosodium glutamate (MSG) and sodium citrate.

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7

Kick butts. If you smoke, quit.

Try this four-step way to snuff your habit. Day 1 – cut the number of cigarettes you smoke by half. Day 3 – cut the number of cigarettes you smoke in half again. Day 5 – cut your smoking in half again.

If you vape, much of the same information applies. Dr. Brandon Hooks, Critical Care and Pulmonary Medicine physician at Ascension Borgess, mentioned in a recent webinar on vaping, mentioned, “We don’t realize when we inhale the vapor, we inhale heavy metal. Not only are you inhaling carcinogens, but heavy metals that break down lung tissue.” He warns that smoking and vaping impairs the immune defenses in the lung.

8 Be a good loser.

Excess weight increases your risk of heart disease, stroke and diabetes. To achieve steady, weight loss, take it easy. Eat 200–300 calories less each day, and be physically active at least 30 minutes on 5 days a week or more and you’ll get closer to your goal.

9 Don’t let a slip keep you down.

If you get off your physical activity schedule, have a cigarette or mess up on a meal, just get back on track immediately with more determination to establish a healthy lifestyle.

10 Say, “Yea for me!”

Keep track of your achievements in physical activity, losing weight or quitting smoking. When you reach a goal, reward yourself by doing something you enjoy.

You can learn more about Go Red for Women at GoRedforWomen.org.

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Eating Disorder AWARENESS MONTH

BY EMILY BETROS

February is Eating Disorder Awareness Month, and this year the support and education tied with it are even more important. The National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) is inviting Every Body to have a Seat at the Table.

They state that, “In a field where marginalized communities continue to be underrepresented, we welcome conversations on raising awareness, challenging systemic biases and sharing stories from all backgrounds and experiences.”

The typical depiction of someone struggling with an eating disorder is a young, middle-class Caucasian girl who is severely underweight. However, eating disorders do not discriminate based on age, race, class, gender identity, ability, or size. Anyone can develop this mental illness, so it is important for all of us to be aware of the signs and symptoms. We can’t let our assumptions about who develops an eating disorder get in the way of helping.

WHAT IS AN EATING DISORDER? An eating disorder is a severe mental illness that can be deadly if left untreated.

This develops as a result of biological,

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psychological, and sociocultural factors. It is estimated that 20 million women and 10 million men in America will have an eating disorder during their lives. Eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any psychiatric illness.

TYPES OF EATING DISORDERS

The three most well-known eating disorders are anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, and binge-eating disorder. Anorexia nervosa is characterized by starvation (inadequate food intake) and excessive weight loss.

There is an intense fear of gaining weight, obsession with size, shape, and weight, and a denial of seriousness of low body weight.

Bulimia nervosa is a cycle of binge eating, followed by purging (self-induced vomiting), laxative/diuretic, fasting, and/or excessive exercise. The binge-purge cycle is accompanied by a sense of loss of control over eating. People suffering from bulimia nervosa are also extremely concerned about their shape and weight. Binge-eating disorder is distinguished by recurrent binge eating without the purging behaviors.

Often, dieting or restricting food is common and there is a perceived lack of control over eating during the binge.

It is important to note that binge eating is different from overeating and emotional eating. A binge is classified as eating a larger amount of food than normal in a short time frame (less than two hours) coupled with a loss of control and feelings of shame, guilt, and disgust after the episode.

Turning to food to cope with feelings or emotions is sometimes generally seen as normal, given that it isn’t the one and only coping mechanism we have. Eating past fullness, or overeating, happens sometimes (think: Thanksgiving), and while you might physically feel uncomfortable or even some guilt around the amount of food you consumed, this is not the same as a binge eating episode.

HOW TO HELP

It can be scary and difficult when you are concerned that a loved one may have an eating disorder. Try to learn as much as you can about eating disorders instead of relying on assumptions or what you see in the media.

Find a quiet, uninterrupted time to talk to the person. Be honest about your concerns and stick to the facts of what you have seen. It is not helpful to beat around the bush or ignore concerning behaviors. Do not make any promises of secrecy or expectations for them

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after the conversation. They are ultimately in charge of what they will do next and need to know that you will be there for them. Even if you are having a hard time understanding why someone has an eating disorder, remember that it is not a choice. Simply telling them to “just eat” or “don’t throw up” will not work. The best thing you can do is encourage them to seek professional help. Ideally, they will want a medical professional, therapist, and dietitian on their recovery team.

This will ensure nothing is getting missed and all aspects of someone’s well being is being addressed.

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week is February 22- 28.

Get involved and help raise awareness and support for those who have suffered or are currently suffering from an eating disorder. The more we talk openly about the pain of dieting, struggles with body image and self-esteem, and the challenges around “ideal” size, shape, and weight, the more we have an opportunity to release the shame around it. No one is immune to the perpetuated myths around beauty. But, we can work towards redefining what determines the worth of a woman, and it isn’t a number on the scale or the shape of her body.

Emily Betros Emily is a licensed clinical social worker, certified health coach, and owner of Reclaiming Health, LLC. She specializes in body image support, eating disorders, anxiety, life transitions, mindfulness, and women's issues. More info: www.reclaiminghealth.net.

WARNING SIGNS

There are different warning signs for each type of eating disorder, and this is not an exhaustive list or checklist. However, these are some signs to be aware of if you or someone you know might be concerned about an eating disorder.

• In general, behaviors and attitudes that indicate that weight loss, dieting, and control of food are becoming primary concerns • Preoccupation with weight, food, calories, carbohydrates, fat grams, and dieting

• Frequent checking in the mirror for perceived flaws in appearance • Food rituals, like eating only a particular food or food group (e.g. condiments), excessive chewing, or doesn’t allow foods to touch • Skipping meals or taking small portions of food at regular meals

• Refusal to eat certain foods, progressing to restrictions against whole categories of food (e.g., no carbohydrates, etc.)

• Any new practices with food or fad diets, including cutting out entire food groups (no sugar, no carbs, no dairy, vegetarianism/veganism)

• Frequent dieting • Extreme mood swings

• Withdrawal from usual friends and activities

• Appears uncomfortable eating around others

• Extreme concern with body size and shape

nationaleatingdisorders.org/warning-signs-and-symptoms

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BOOK REVIEW

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MARLITA WALKER REVIEWS

THE ONE-IN-AMILLION BOY

BY MONICA WOOD

Who has ever made a serious mistake that they have regretted through much of their life? This lovely read by Monica Woods presents to us several characters who are living with just such regrets.

Ona Vitkus, at age 104, lives independently in her cozy little home, but realizes she needs a bit of help in maintaining tasks outside. The kind scoutmaster in town, with a community program for his scouts, drops off a young boy to assist Ona. A “One in a Million” boy. A quiet boy.

One who makes lists and relentlessly counts. He finishes his weekly tasks—and is wise beyond his years. A boy who recognizes Ona’s loneliness and is determined to give her purpose--who records Ona’s long history and uncovers secrets and shame--whom Ona begins to love as they develop an unusual friendship.

Quinn Porter, the boy’s much absent musician father, steps in to assist Ona with her yard chores. Ona doesn’t know why. At first she believes she was mistaken about this sweet boy…did he decide to shirk his duties? Did he become enamored with another task to pursue? Did their friendship not mean as much to him as it did to her? When Ona reads the obituary in the local paper, her questions stop…and a new friendship with Quinn begins. He works tirelessly in repairing Ona’s home; beautifying flowerbeds, cutting tree limbs, fixing the broken porch, replacing light bulbs. He works to complete the boy’s agreement contract with Ona. He works to assuage his guilt over spending more time on the road than in his home.

Belle Cosgrove, the boy’s distraught and grieving mother, also enters a relationship with Ona. Quinn suggests that in entering Ona’s home, he senses the boy’s presence…and oh how Belle needs to feel that. Unlike Quinn’s rocky start with Ona (he had to get past her prickly exterior), Belle and Ona bond more quickly, their commonalities as women and mothers who had each lost a son being foundational to this fledgling friendship.

This trio of characters embark on a journey together. This journey involves a road trip to reunite Ona with her son; but more importantly, this journey of friendship begins to heal the broken

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places in each of their hearts: Belle, over her only son’s death; Ona, over the lost years of a damaged friendship; and Quinn, over the loss of his marriage, his career dreams and the truthful reality he was not a good father.

Woods weaves a story rich with quirky, imperfect people who learn how to lean into each other. Though they may not acknowledge or understand it, each bridges their individual loneliness to serve the other, to accept the other and put the others’ needs ahead of their own. It’s a story of redemption.

The final chapter backtracks to the boy’s final morning, riding his bike in the pre-dawn to put the finishing touches on Ona’s memoirs…the sounds of hundreds of birds breaking forth in song.

The selfless heart of “The One-in-a-Million Boy” wanted to fulfill this important ode to Ona. Marlita Walker Marlita is a native Michigander, who returned back to the area after 18 years spent in IL and PA. When she is not on cruising adventures with her hubby in their vintage Roadtrek camper van; she relaxes by re-arranging her home decor, walking with friends, and connecting with her 10 grands who live in TN and CA. Read more book reviews at litaslines.blogspot.com.

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PANTONE’S 2021 COLORS OF THE YEAR

O P P O S I T E S T H AT R E P R E S E N T H O P E A N D R E S I L I E N C Y

Did you know every year, the Pantone Institute aims to crown colors that reflect the moods and events in our global culture? Pantone’s color finders analyze and study films in production; traveling art collections; the works of new artists; happenings in fashion and other areas of design; popular travel destinations; new lifestyles; socioeconomic conditions; fresh technologies, materials, and textures; trends in social media visuals and more.

“The union of an enduring Ultimate Gray with the vibrant yellow, Illuminating, expresses a message of positivity supported by fortitude,” added Leatrice Eiseman, executive director of the Pantone Color Institute, in the same statement. “Practical and rock solid, but at the same time, warming and optimistic, this is a color combination that gives us resilience and hope. We need to feel encouraged and uplifted—this is essential to the human spirit.”

“The Pantone Color of the Year reflects what is taking place in our global culture, expressing what people are looking for that color can hope to answer,” said Laurie Pressman, vice president of the Pantone Color Institute, in the same statement. “As society continues to recognize color as a critical form of communication, and a way to symbolize thoughts and ideas, many designers and brands are embracing the language of color to engage and connect.”

The two hues, technically known as Pantone 17-5104 Ultimate Gray and Pantone 13-0647 Illuminating, together “create an aspirational color pairing, conjoining deeper feelings of thoughtfulness with the optimistic promise of a sunshine-filled day,” reads a prepared statement from the Pantone Institute, whose various color declarations influence creative decision makers.

On the jewelry front, Illuminating could best be interpreted through the lens of lemon quartz, canary diamond, yellow sapphire, quartz, citrine, yellow tourmaline, yellow garnet, to name a few. Meanwhile, Ultimate Gray, brings to mind gray mother-of-pearl, gray diamonds, gray spinel, gray moonstone, hematite, gray sapphires. For metals, keep an eye on darkened or oxidized metals, stainless steel, tungsten, textured finishes, as well as yellow and white metal mixes.

To look at many options and discuss alternative gemstones and ideas, come visit UniQ Jewelry Gallery.

T-F 11a-5p & Sat 10a-3p

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I

e v e NLo v I o E L TO B

A

favorite memory I have is working on the radio in Toledo and doing a love song show, “The Quiet Storm.” Listeners would call in and share their deepest and sometimes darkest feelings with me: Their hopes, their fears, excitement and tears. As I listened to their stories, I tried to understand this abstract form of love they spoke about. I say abstract because romantic love has always confused me. Superficially it looks easy, meet a normal, honorable person, get to know them, become friends, fall in love and grow together as you travel down life’s path.

But what really is the definition of a successful relationship? A friend of mine, Paul Jendrasiak, said it best, “Successful relationships are based on the compatibility of each other’s insanities.”

We are all a little quirky. Maybe that was why I enjoyed going to work each evening. I learned we have more in common with each other than it may appear. The show was a safe place,

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because in a way it was anonymous, voyeuristic, compelling and inspiring.

We can learn so much from one another when we share our stories.

Oftentimes, on my drive home from work, after my seven to midnight shift, I would ruminate on a particular call that stuck with me, something I just could not shake. I had often pulled over to the side of the road to write about it as a way to purge and decompress. Sometimes just writing the words down on paper is enough to validate your thoughts and feelings.

The words, the poem, would flow through my fingertips onto the paper as if I was taking dictation. The next morning, I would read the words and wonder where in the world they came from. One lighthearted poem in my book, “Essence of Life: A Compilation of Inspiration Story and Poem,” was inspired by that gleeful feeling one gets when they find themselves in love.

I Love To Be In Love

I love to be in love how the sky’s a brighter blue And the sun is always shining like the thoughts I have of you I love to be in love everyday a simple pleasure All the little things you do become the memories that I treasure.

I love to be in love waking moments meant for two

Rushing home right after work with my racing thoughts of you I love to be in love this I know when I arrive

To kiss your lips and touch your face make me feel so alive.

I love to be in love longing gazes in the night Tender words spoken so softly holding hands neath’ the moonlight

I love to be in love real feelings deep and true I love to be in love with you.

Remember what that was like? Maybe you feel it now. Sometimes, it can happen when you least expect it.

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These heartfelt stories lend the question: What makes for a

satisfying relationship? Qualities might include mutual empathy, respect, kindness, vulnerability,

trust, validation and unwavering honesty, a gentleness with each other, respect for boundaries,

Eric & Lori,

1978

Eric Goldberg shares his story about finding Lori, his “meant to be:” “In 1978 I met an amazing young blond-haired girl that I asked out.

We dated for three fun, fabulous and adventurous years. She had an employment opportunity out of town which ended our three-year run. Lori eventually moved to south Florida.

For three and a half decades we lived our separate lives and spoke on the phone only twice. I never for a moment forgot the years we had together. We reunited when on an off chance I saw a random comment from her on a mutual friend’s Facebook page. That day was her first time on any social media. At 11:00 a.m., 12/13/14 (11:12/13/14), standing on the shore of Singer Island, Florida, we wed. We have had six fabulous and adventurous years and will have many more come. I have won the grand prize TWICE to have this woman by my side.”

all-in committed, the ability to

Eric & Lori,

forgive, with lots of affection

2014

Navy in World War II. She excitedly explained how a couple of girls moved in upstairs and she liked them very much. She told him she was going to invite one of them down for a walleye fish dinner the next time he returned home on leave. She did just that!

After the dinner, he and my mother sat on the front porch and talked. He asked her out on a date and she accepted. For the next four weeks he was to be stationed in Chicago waiting to be discharged. Every weekend he would return to his mother’s house and they would go on another date. After four weekends, he asked her to marry him. They were married for over 70 years.

When Eric shared his story with me, my first thought was “Sleepless In Seattle.”

It was magic!

While Eric had over 30 years of history with Lori, my parents had more of a whirlwind courtship. My mother, at 17 years of age, and her aunt lived together in an “upper income” in Detroit. The owner of the home, my grandmother, lived on the lower level and she wrote to her son who was serving in the

and appreciation. Like Eric and Lori, and Mom and Dad, don’t be surprised should love find you when you least expect it.

Kim Carson Kim is an Author/Podcast/ TV/Internet personality.

Watch and listen for her on WGVU TV’s Kalamazoo Lively Arts and J. Schwanke’s Life In Bloom. Learn more at kimcarson.online and fb.com/kimcarson

d, 2018

Mom & Da

Mom & Da

d, 1945

Happy Valentine’s Day February 2021

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|

RECIPES

|

MARDI GRAS MENU On February 16th (Fat Tuesday) celebrate Mardi Gras with these authentic New Orleans dishes.

JAMBALAYA

1 lb. chicken thighs 2 tbsp unsalted butter 1 lb. Andouille Sausage (smoked sausage works, too), sliced into rounds 1 medium yellow onion, chopped 1 green pepper, chopped 2 celery stalks, diced 1 bunch green onions, chopped separate white and green parts 3 cloves garlic, minced 1 20-oz. can crushed tomatoes ¼ c. tomato puree 2 whole bay leaves 1 tsp salt ½ tsp ground black pepper ¼ tsp ground cayenne ¼ tsp dried thyme 1 tsp Creole Seasoning 4 c. chicken stock ¼ tsp red pepper flakes, more to taste 2 c. long-grain white rice, well rinsed Heat 1 1/2 tablespoon oil in large stockpot over medium heat. Add chicken thighs to skillet, smooth side down; cook for 5 minutes or until you can easily flip over the chicken. Flip and continue to cook for 6-7 more minutes or until no longer pink.

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In a large stockpot or Dutch oven over medium-high heat, melt butter. Brown sausage on both sides.

Stir in onions, green pepper, celery, white parts of green onions, and garlic. Stir occasionally and cook about 5 minutes or until clear.

Add crushed tomatoes, tomato puree, salt, pepper, cayenne, thyme, Creole seasoning, and bay leaves.

Stir for 2 minutes.

Pour in chicken stock and stir to combine. Stir in pepper sauce or red pepper flakes.

Bring to a boil then reduce heat to a simmer. I reduced heat to about a 2/3 level on the stovetop.

Cook uncovered until liquid is reduced by 1/3 or about 1 hour.

Bring jambalaya to a boil. Stir in 2 cups uncooked rice then reduce heat to medium. Stirring occasionally, cook 15-25 minutes, or until rice is done. *NOTE* If rice

is not done and liquid is gone, stir in 1/4 cup water at a time.

Stir in remaining green onions.

Serve with hot sauce if desired.

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CRAWFISH PASTA

1 lb. linguine, fettuccine, or rotini 2 Tbsp olive oil 6 Tbsp unsalted butter 1 c. yellow onions, chopped 2 Tbsp garlic, minced 3 tsps Creole seasoning 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper 1/4 c. dry white wine 2 c. half and half 1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice

butter over mediumhigh heat.

In a large pot of boiling, salted water, cook the pasta until al dente, about 8 minutes. Drain, reserving 1/4 cup of the pasta water.

Cook, stirring occasionally, until slightly reduced. Add the crawfish tails and cook until warm. Add the green onions and parsley.

Cook for 1 minute.

Return pasta to the pot & toss with the olive oil.

In a large pan, melt the

BEIGNETS

Add onions and cook, until soft, about 5 minutes. Add the garlic and Creole seasoning. Cook, stirring for 1 minute.

Add the wine and cook over high heat until nearly all evaporated.

Add the half-half, lemon juice, and reserved pasta water.

Remove from heat and add Parmesan cheese.

Serve immediately.

* Dough needs to be refrigerated overnight before frying.

1 package (1/4 oz.) active dry yeast ¼ c. warm water 1 c. evaporated milk ½ c. canola oil ¼ c. sugar 1 large egg, room temperature 4½ c. self-rising flour Oil for deep frying Confectioners’ sugar

In a large bowl, dissolve yeast in warm water. Add milk, oil, sugar, egg and 2 cups flour.

Beat until smooth. Stir in

enough remaining flour to form a soft dough (dough will be sticky). Do not knead.

Cover & refrigerate overnight.

Punch down dough. Turn onto a floured surface; roll into a 16x12-in. rectangle.

Cut into 2-in. squares.

In a deep skillet, heat 1 inch oil to 375 F. Fry squares, in batches, until golden brown on both sides.

Drain on paper towels.

Roll warm beignets in confectioners’ sugar.

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DON’T

SELL YOURSELF SHORT

Y

ou have heard it before: You never get a second chance to make an irretrievable first impression.

Research has shown that we start to form impressions of others after seeing their faces for less than one-tenth of a second. In that micro-flash of time, we subconsciously decide whether or not someone is attractive, trustworthy, competent, etc. The visual impact of a full, conscious first impression happens in five to 15 seconds.

What does this mean professionally? That you have one initial opportunity in any interaction to set the stage for success, and you don’t want to miss it by selling yourself short.

When someone tells you they think you are selling yourself short, pay attention to this valuable feedback! This means they believe that you are not portraying yourself in a way that’s fair to you — based on what they know about your achievements, accomplishments or potential. You sell yourself short when you don’t believe in yourself or when it appears that way to others.

DO YOU SELL YOURSELF SHORT?

You can’t get away from this. No matter what you do, you are always selling yourself. Whether during a sales call or an interview, while networking or meeting others, or interacting online professionally or socially, do you (honestly now) present yourself as accurately and positively as possible? Or do you undercut yourself by thinking ahead of time? “Oh, that’s not important.” Or “They won’t care about that.” You need to be open to positioning (a.k.a. “selling”) yourself appropriately and well for ALL of life’s interactions, particularly those first ones.

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HOW TO NOT UNDERSELL YOURSELF A few simple strategies can help you consistently present your best self.

•Keep a positive mindset. Keep your thinking positive and have faith in yourself, your skills and accomplishments. Even if you have to “fake it until you make it,” when you believe in yourself, others will too.

•Maintain an appropriate, polished appearance. In other words, look the part. Five to 15 seconds goes by fast!

Take the time to be well groomed and dressed appropriately for the occasion.

Thoroughly consider the effects of your appearance on yourself and those you’ll be interacting with.

•Use confident, open body postures and behaviors. Walk and carry yourself into a space confidently and assertively. This doesn’t mean you need to be brazen, but act in an assured way that supports your talents, accomplishments and qualifications. Slinking into a room won’t ever win you anything!

•Practice excellent spoken and written communication skills. If it would help, study how someone you admire handles language. You are going for assurance and fluidity. Avoid filler words or selfdemeaning statements such as, “Well, this might not matter but…” or “Maybe, if you think it’s okay, we could…”

THECROSSROADSMALL.COM

FIND FAMILY-FRIENDLY FUN WAITING FOR YOU AT THE CROSSROADS IN PORTAGE. No matter what you’re looking for, our mix of stores, high-end brands, and more than 90 specialty stores has something for everyone!

6 6 5 0 S O U T H W E S T N E D G E AV E N U E , P O R TAG E , M I

The good news is you get to choose how people see you and how you see yourself.

Selling yourself short does not depend on your own perception of yourself. It’s about what others see and understand about you, and whether that reflects reality. With the strategies listed above, you can shape the impression that you create for others and sell yourself in an intentional and strategic manner.

How do you sell yourself short? How can you easily correct this to win professionally and personally and obtain the success you desire?

Kelly Duggan Kelly is an Image Consultant specializing in executive and personal image development, etiquette & communication skills.

She is a certified member of the Association of Image Consultants International. Contact Kelly at: www.kellyduggan.com.

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Resilience

What do Girl Scouts have in common with businesses thriving during a world of uncertainty?

� � � �

Critical and creative thinking Taking risks in a safe space Persistence and resilience Courage, confidence, and character

Find your cookies at gshom.org

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