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Essential • Enlightening • Entertaining
GREATER KALAMAZOO
FR EE !
June 2008 Things are Heating Up!
Lighten Up Outdoor Spaces
Look Who’s Talking
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Left-Right: Alex, Dustin, Darlene, Eric, Andrew & Drew
From the Publisher Isn't spring wonderful? The beauty I've seen this month is astonishing. The flowering trees make me want to stop and write poetry about their incredible beauty. The first day of summer (June 20) is right around the corner and soon we'll be running around in shorts and bathing suits! I sincerely hope you had a wonderful Mother's Day and enjoyed some “down” time. I also hope you made a commitment to National Women's Health Week and started some form of exercise. I have personally recommitted to Dakota, my golden retriever, that he and I will take a long walk at least 3-4 times a week. We both need it! Our June magazine is dedicated to “The Men In Our Lives” and all things fashion, food and fun that enhance their lives as well as ours. As you can see there are quite a few men in my life! Each one of them enhances my life in some way everyday! What can I say about that handsome husband of mine? Anyone who puts up with me for 37 years is too good to be true! Eric is the love of my life and always will be. Professionally, he's retired now after 30 years with the same company. He is a truly talented man who cares deeply about his family, his country and all things political! My son, Dustin, captured my heart from the first moment I held him and looked into his hazel eyes! He's a very talented computer guru and is always on-demand. He shares his mother's sense of humor (often warped & always close to the surface) and is just an incredibly fun person to be around. Andrew (we call him Andy) joined our family 12 years ago and “fit like a glove” right from the start. He's an excellent attorney and is well respected within the business community. He's a heck of a gardener and very creative in all things. He's also an awesome husband and father. Anyone who loves my daughter and grandchildren as much as he obviously does, can do no wrong in my book.
Then we come to the 2 “little” guys! Oh! Wow! Those grandsons of mine are truly amazing! Alex, (I call him Alexander the Great) is going on five this summer and Drew (I call him DrewMeister) is just two. Alex is earnest and dedicated in everything he does. When he liked “Bob the Builder” he liked only “Bob the Builder”. Now that he's moved on to dinosaurs, guess what? Now he likes only dinosaurs and he knows the names and details of each type. It's fascinating how much he knows about dinosaurs! I think he's going to be the spitting image of his father. Drew is what I call a “bruiser.” He's solid and forceful and moves with confidence. He's so happy and glad just to be alive, except when things don't go just his way! Then he's a force to be reckoned with! It's not pretty - but it is short lived and then he's back to being happy, laid back Drew. He reminds me so much of his Uncle Dustin! Don't tell the other men in my life, but these 2 guys rock my world! What about the men in your life? Father's Day is June 15 and I hope you will take some time to celebrate with him/them. Fix their favorite meal, go to a ball game, whatever they prefer….just take a moment to show how much you care. We've included some great ideas for “Gifts for Dad”, as well as some recipes he's sure to love. Getting married soon or know someone who is? Be sure to check out our green wedding ideas. It's the season for outdoor living, so we've included some great ideas for making your patio a more inviting place. As we head into summer, please think about volunteering. Right now in Michigan we all know someone who could use some help. If you are one of the fortunate ones who has a good job and for whom life is going well, why not share some of your good fortune with those who are need. Please take a moment to read about the benefits of volunteering. Everybody wins when you volunteer! Have a great June!
Darlene
CONTACT US By Phone: 269-569-1647 By Email: wlskazoo@provide.net By Mail: Greater Kalamazoo Women’s Lifestyle P.O. Box 228, Portage, MI 49081-2284
Expand Your Horizons Coffee With Jennifer ............................................................... 4 What Women Can Learn From Men .........................................6 Money Sense ..........................................................................14 Conquer Your Clutter: How To Live With (And Still Love) A Male Packrat ...............................................22 Reader’s Lounge .....................................................................30 His Style Gifts For Dad ............................................................................7 Fashion: Tell Him It’s Time To Suit Up .......................................8 Fashion Essentials for Summer ..................................................9 Eco-Chic It’s A Nice Day For A Green Wedding .....................................12
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Greater Kalamazoo
Career Work It!: The Value of Volunteering.........................................18 Look Who’s Talking Lori Moore..............................................................................15 Women’s Health Fitness for Two........................................................................10 The Moods of Menopause ......................................................27 At Home Outdoor Spaces Lighten Up....................................................20 The Savvy Shopper Navigating the Meat Case ......................................................23 Contest Find That Advertiser!...............................................................13 A Taste of Something New Al Fresco Dining Mango Caprese Salad..........................................................25 Baja Fish Tacos With Mango Salsa........................................25 Mango Chicken Lettuce Wraps ............................................25 A Steak for Every Dad Filet Mignon with Compound Butter...................................16 Mustard-Glazed Top Sirloin..................................................17 Blackened Rib Eye Steak With Creamy Horseradish Sauce ....17 Spicy Portuguese Steak Kabobs ...........................................17 Things Are Heating Up Presto Chicken & Vegetable Kabobs ....................................24 Cajun Beef Pepper Steak......................................................24 Local Events & Other Hot Stuff Follow Up! Pictures .................................................................19 Hot Stuff .................................................................................26 Events Calendar ......................................................................28
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She purchases or influences the purchase of 82% of all consumer goods. Dear Jennifer, I’ve been close friends with someone for about 10 years. Last month we had a disagreement on something and she hasn’t talked to me very much since. I have apologized twice. I’m starting to think this friendship is never going to be the same. Should I leave it alone? I don’t want to apologize again. – T. J., Kentwood
She decides where to go and what to do.
Dear T.J., A friendship that has lasted 10 years is well worth saving, so let’s take it from the top. You stated the two of you had a disagreement that has resulted in your friend seeming distant. Not knowing the nature of the friendship or the issue at hand, I’m going to throw a few possibilities out there.
She sets the appointments.
First, your friend may be distancing herself because the issue hasn’t been resolved in her mind and she’s still hurt. If you think it might still be unresolved to her, reflect on exactly how you apologized. Did you say something like “I’m sorry, but…,” or “I’m sorry you think this is such a problem?” These kinds of apologies shoot back blame and absolve us of responsibility. The best apology is straightforward and genuine, such as, “Look, I’m really sorry for what happened and that I’ve hurt you.” Second, if you think she might be punishing you by acting in a passive-aggressive way, you need to confront it. Some women may subtly threaten to withdraw their friendship if you don’t respond to them the way they want you to. This is manipulative. Out of respect for yourself, and to help her acknowledge what she’s doing, you may need to tell her that you cannot fix the problem if she can’t definitively tell you what it is.
She is your best customer She loves reading Women’s Lifestyle Magazine.
The third possibility is more common than you might think. When a relationship becomes uncomfortable for some reason, or if there is a history of one friend draining the other emotionally, a specific incident may be used as a reason to end the friendship. You can usually spot this because the reaction to the disagreement is exaggerated and the wounded party is inconsolable. The other thing I wonder about is whether or not you need to take accountability for the disagreement. Let me explain. Sometimes in a friendship, one person is more dominant and the other one always takes the fall in order to keep the relationship going. It’s OK to feel sorry that things have worked out this way, no matter what, but did you say something you actually need forgiveness for? Think about the dynamic of your relationship because you should both be assertive and straightforward. Take some time to think about these things, and then give it one more shot in a letter. Send her a handwritten letter about the value of her friendship and how much you miss the relationship that seems to be fading. Most importantly, ask her what she needs from you right now. Assess the situation and apologize for your part in it, or simply say that you feel badly that things have turned out this way. Let her know you are there if she wants to talk.
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If she doesn’t respond to your letter, you’ve done your best and it’s time to move on. She may come around later, but for now you need to give her the space she wants and give yourself the respect of not continually pleading for the relationship. Saying “I’m sorry” places us in the vulnerable position of potential rejection and causes us to face our faults. However, there is no phrase that comes close in its power to heal and restore.
Jennifer Scrogin, R.N., is a Community Educator and Certified Mediator. Through her extensive background in women’s health and education she has founded JIS Communications, a program that focuses on assertive and effective communication between women in the workplace and in their personal relationships. Have a question for Jennifer? She can be reached at Jennifer@womenslifestylemagazine.com.
4 Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
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What Women Can Learn from Men by Jan Deremo Lundy
A
s a woman who continues to journey more deeply into her truest self, I am always on the lookout for good role models—men or women who can guide me into greater authenticity and personal empowerment. In honor of Father’s Day, I thought it might be interesting to take a look at what learning we can glean from the men in our lives, for the purpose of our greater growth. For me, this life journey is not so much about being the ideal woman or ideal man, but living as a balanced human being with qualities of each. If we are fully actualized individuals, we embody both male and female characteristics. Fully actualized, we are the sum of all our parts, both yin (female) and yang (male). We come into our fullness as human beings by embracing the qualities of the other and cultivating those we may lack within ourselves. Knowing this, I asked myself: OK, what characteristics might a man have which would strengthen and empower him? And, how might I cultivate those qualities to strengthen and empower myself? Of course, my thoughts naturally turned to my husband, for I would say he is quite a well balanced individual, possessing both male and female traits. He is confident and strong. He lives with determination and passion. Yet he is kind, compassionate, and nurturing. He lives from his heart as well as from his head, an equitable blend of mind and soul. What about me? I think I’m a little bit weighted to the feminine side and could use a good measure of the masculine now and then to even me out. There are two specific areas of self-improvement that I continue to work on, using my husband as a role model. Over the years, I have met thousands of women who are struggling with these areas too. The good news is that as we are able to incorporate each of them more fully into our lives, we begin to move into greater wholeness—as individuals and as a society. Here they are, for your consideration:
The Ability to
Be Direct It seems that men and women do, indeed, think differently. Men, as I understand it, are more linear in thought, going from A to B to get to a solid C. Women apparently think in a more circular fashion and have a tendency to go around and around before arriving at the desired outcome. Needless to say, these two different styles of thinking can be very frustrating when it comes to communication between the sexes. My husband often reminds me (gently, of course) to be more direct; to say what I mean and mean what I say. Like many women, I sometimes fall prey to thoughts of not rocking the boat, avoiding someone’s ire, “people pleasing,” or any number of strategies to deliver my message more softly without the perceived
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risk of ruffling anyone’s feathers, so ‘round and ‘round I go. Learning to speak in a straightforward manner is part of learning to “speak our truth.” Author Carol Lee Flinders (At The Root of This Longing) addresses this issue well. “Down the corridors of all times,” she writes, “feminist scholarship has shown us, that same quashing chorus has silenced women, excluding us so effectively from all avenues of discourse that ultimately it not only impaired our capacity to speak at all—to say what we mean, without fear of consequence ... but even lessened the ease with which we imagined what we might say if we thought we could.” To live as the vibrant women we are meant to be it is imperative that we find our own voice and use it effectively; that we speak our truth when asked, and make our thoughts and feelings known in a compelling, but kind manner. This is key to our strength and empowerment as women.
The Ability to
Ask For What We Need Again, my husband has been a wise mentor in this area, reminding me to let him know—directly—what it is that I need in any given moment. For a myriad of reasons, many women skirt the issue of their own needs. We put ourselves on the back burner and consider others’ needs to be more important than our own. We also have a tendency to believe that, somehow, through osmosis or intuition, others will “know” what it is we want or need without us actually telling them. It is true, women can more easily assess (and address)
Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
other people’s needs by observing their facial expressions, body language and voice intonation. Scientists tell us we have this “gift” because we are born nurturers. As mothers, we attune ourselves to what it is our infant or child needs because they may not able to express themselves verbally. Just because we have this ability, however, does not mean that men do. In fact, researchers tell us that this ability to “read others” is not well-honed in men. Therefore, it is vitally important for our well-being that we improve our communication skills so that we can competently give voice to our needs. We cannot assume someone else will know what it is that we desire. Furthermore, to make them guess or struggle is not kind, nor does it empower us. This Father’s Day I’m thanking my husband for the example of personal empowerment he exhibits for me. I am also very grateful that he continues to encourage me to be my best self. My best self is a woman who continues to move away from any disempowering fears that prevent me from living as a whole human being. How about you? Are you ready to step forth and tell the world what you think, feel and need? When you do, when we all do, the world will be a much more balanced place to live.
Jan Deremo Lundy is an inspirational speaker, spiritual director and author of Coming Home to Ourselves: A Woman’s Journey to Wholeness. Her newest book, co-authored with her husband, is Perfect Love: How to Find Yours and Make It Last Forever. Email her at jan@awakenedliving.com or visit awakenedliving.com.
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The Mariner Tommy Private Cabana Summer Cologne Set $45 He’ll feel footloose and fancyfree with this beach-inspired fragrance. This flip-flop fragrance pops with Key West Orange flower and Waikiki Coconut, while keeping its cool with Spearmint Leaves, Lavender and Santa Monica Jasmine. Make the fragrance last as long as a summer day with the coordinating body wash. Perfect gift for the yachtsman and the beach bum!
By Marianne Bockheim
Okay, this month it’s Dad’s turn to be pampered. Help him look and feel his best with these handsome finds that suit his personality. After all, why should men just settle for a bar of soap?
The Deliberate Dad Redken 5th Avenue FOR MEN Invigorating System Mint Clean $10.95, Cool Finish $11.95, Chill Blast $13.95
The Dashing Professional HUGO BOSS BOSS Pure $49.50 (1.7oz.), $65 (2.5oz.) The ideal scent for the contemporary business man, BOSS Pure will simply add to his impeccable character and style. The fragrance will morph, just like his day, taking him from the freshness of Mediterranean citrus notes, to the clarity of lily and hyacinth, to the masculine strength of massoia, a pure wood. A successful gift for a successful guy!
The Manly Man Dermalogica™ SHAVE Collection Clean Bar $15, Daily Clean Scrub $24, Pre-Shave Guard $16, Soothing Shave Cream $16, Invigorating Shave Cream $16, Post-Shave Balm $26, Daily Defense Block SPF 15 $34 Give dad all he needs to look and feel age defying! Dermalogica™ is the perfect solution for the manly man to quietly reap the rewards of great skincare. The SHAVE Collection, Step 1: Clean Bar is a soap-free solution to a gentle, thorough cleansing. Includes the natural antiseptic of Tea Tree and anti-inflammatory agents like Colloidal Oatmeal and Licorice; Daily Clean Scrub (use about 3 times a
Start Dad’s day with a zip and a zing with this minty hair collection. Mint Clean invigorating shampoo is great for all hair types and helps stimulate and balance the scalp. Follow up with Cool Finish invigorating conditioner to pack a punch of protein and provitamin to strengthen the hair. Finally, soothe, relieve and control the scalp with Chill Blast daily antidandruff leave-in treatment. With this trio, he’ll not only be head-strong, but head-happy!
week) helps exfoliate dead, dry skin while treating the skin to a dose of Aloe Vera juice and anti-oxidants like White Birch and Lemon Extract. Pre-Shave Guard is a lightweight formula with Clove Flower oil, Menthol and Glycerin to smooth on and prepare skin for shaving. Step 2: Soothing Shave Cream is an ultra-calming and anti-inflammatory shave cream to help keep even the most sensitive skin in check and reduce the potential of irritation, or, Invigorating Shave Gel gives him that close barbershop shave and also protects skin from the signs of aging. Step 3: Post-Shave Balm soothes and moisturizes with natural extracts, and Daily Defense Block SPF 15 to protect skin from the sun’s harmful rays. Available at professional skin treatment centers, salons and spas.
The Stong Silent Type Escada Moon Sparkle $45 (1.6oz.), $55 (3.3oz.) A rich and smooth scent for the strong, silent type, Moon Sparkle captures the sophistication found beneath a tough exterior. A layering of intrigue allows citrus notes to dance with woody notes to captivate; while mandarin rejuvenates and vetyver entices.
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Tell Him It’s Time To Suit Up by Victoria Upton
The days of business casual are over. A more polished and traditional man is now entering the workplace with a cleaner, more refined style. Two button jackets with wider spacing between the buttons for a leaner look and flat front pants replace the oversized everything. Lapels lose their girth. Cologne is clean-scented with an exotic hint of island breezes. Silver and grey are back. Women’s fashion makes leaps and bounds but menswear evolves in baby steps. The biggest news in men’s fashion is the slimming of the necktie. I love jewelry and a dash of bling myself but I’m not fond of man jewelry unless it holds special significance, like a beaded necklace his child made at camp or a medalert bracelet. Otherwise, a man only needs to wear his wedding ring and a watch. Yet, a watch can speak volumes. Men’s time pieces can express his personality or fantasy. Whether he’s a down-to-earth, no-frills “I just need to know what time it is, here and now” practical fellow, or a man of mystery and international intrigue 007 masterpiece of gadgetry guy, a distinguishing watch completes his business look.
Skinny tie (Calvin Klein), the newest angle in neckwear. $39.50
Round Chronograph watch by Fossil. $95
Must Haves for Men courtesy of Macy’s
• • • • • • • • • • •
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Two-button suits Silver and grey Deconstructed sportcoats Botanical neckwear Skinny tie Dark detailed denim Plaid shorts to board shorts Graphic details Rolled-up sleeves Canvas sneakers Polos
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Austin Reed Menswear
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Izod Cool-FX performance polo. $58
Ralph Lauren Canvas shoes. Madras slip-on, $49. Lace-up in white or orange. $55
with input from the fashion experts at Macy’s
If man was left alone to do his own shopping, his closet might be a pretty bland place. Fashion experts report that men aren’t as afraid of color as they used to be. Yet, can you imagine him picking out a pair of optimsitic orange canvas shoes or a sunny yellow tie on his own? Let him cherish his black dockers and Levi’s, while you introduce some splash to his attire with colorful fashion essentials.
Calvin Klein sunglasses by Marchon
Color brings new life to greys, neutrals and pure whites. Bold shots of yellow, orange, green and blue are used to create a modern aesthetic that is both clean and simple. Active wear continues to influence contemporary sportswear. The look is comfortable while remaining neat and sophisticated. The essentials for this summer include: Polos Bermuda shorts Botanical theme neckwear Designer shades Pure white or colorful sneakers A refreshing scent
Nautica botanical inspired silk neckwear. $39.50
Tommy Bahama Set Sail St. Barts. 3.4-oz. Cologne Spray. $52.50
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Fitness
The Couple Who Sways Together,
Stays Together By Kerri Reinbold, RN, BSN
by a similar notion!) Even better, students of Anusara Yoga are taught principles of self-examination, change and openness to new ideas – qualities to practice both in the studio and in the real world. Classes are interactive, often requiring the aid of a partner to achieve the maximum integrity and benefit of each pose. See Anusara.com to find a class near you. After all, your relationship deserves a deep breath, opportunity for focus, and a good stretch.
The Great Outdoors The intensity of fresh air and activity cannot be denied. With the help of Trails.com you can take your relationship to new terrain. With more than 42,779 downloadable trail maps and descriptions to choose from, plan a getaway for the day, week or even longer. See top rated trails, make hotel reservations, check out state and national parks, and search guidebooks, all with the click of a mouse. Hike, mountain bike, visit hot springs, go rock climbing or ski to your hearts’ content. If you love both your sweetheart and the outdoors, you’re on the right track with Trails.com.
Built for Two Certain activities beg to be shared. Bicycling and kayaking are just two. A trip to your local outdoor outfitter can put you in touch with special trips and classes offered for biking and kayaking enthusiasts. Often, all for one price, outfitters will plan a trip to the best river or bike path, give you lessons, provide the right equipment, pack you a lunch, and transport you to and from the location. Talk about fitness that's truly built for two!
Just Relax
ou may be lovebirds, but how much quality time do you set aside for each other? If it’s not enough, then grab your sweetheart and check out these ideas put together with the two of you in mind. This month, dare to be living proof that couples who sweat together most certainly stay together. You might also find the following to be true: love and fitness make a perfect pair.
Y
better dance together? Tango, Salsa, Fox-Trot, or TwoStep your way to fun, heart-pumping fitness. Lessons are easily accessible and level of ability is rarely a factor. A quick Internet search can put you in touch with a local studio offering a wide range of toe-tapping classes. Stop dancing around the need for time together and make a date today that's sure to get your relationship back into the swing of things. Get started by visiting Arthurmurray.com.
Two to Tango
Om in the Home
Romantic relationships are truly a dance. Grace, coordination, strength, avoiding each other’s toes – all are ingredients for a rhythmic relationship. Why not honor the hard work it takes to stay committed by learning to
Anusara, which means "going with the flow" or "following your heart," is a form of yoga practice based on a philosophy that looks for the good in all people and all things. (If only more relationships were guided
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Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
Finally, relationships are hard work. Reward your desire to sweat and stay together by booking your next vacation for two through Spafinder.com. Enter "fitness" in the search indicator and choose from any one of the dozens of spas that appear. These health-oriented spas are perfect for planning a trip that allows for activity and relaxation all in one place. The popular Canyon Ranch of Tucson, Ariz. offers a Life Enhancement Program designed for couples and small groups to reach positive health goals or tackle health concerns. Does it get better than red rocks, blue skies and your best friend by your side? Spafinder.com offers worthwhile discounts for off-season, last minute and holiday specials as well. See the "best buys" feature at the bottom right corner and start planning today. What a great way to celebrate your relationship. Kerri Reinbold, RN, BSN is a nurse, writer, mother of twins Abe and Jake, and has been dancing with her husband Chris for almost 8 years.
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Planning a “green” wedding? Emily Elizabeth Anderson, author of Eco-Chic Weddings ($12.95, Hatherleigh Press) offers some tips: Choose a church or park. Or any venue that is already beautifully decorated, so that you can save on both the cost and environmental impact of bringing in lots of flowers or other decorations.
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Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
Use in-season flowers. They're cheaper, and you'll reduce the environmental cost of shipping in non-local flowers. Forget the cake-topper: Avoid the wedding themed (and tacky) cake-toppers – they’ll be thrown away once the day is over. Instead, have beautiful fondant, piping, fruit, or edible flowers. Serve organic coffee, chocolate and sugar: Ensure these items come from organic, fair-trade cocoa farmers. There are some 42,000 cocoa cooperatives that help small farmers get their products to market while protecting the environment and enabling them to earn a living wage. And choose to use organically grown sugar, or better yet, more natural sweeteners like fruit, honey, or agave nectar. Avoid throw-aways: Make sure the platters, utensils, glasses, napkins, and any other materials are not one-time use items. This goes for all events leading up to the wedding as well (showers, engagement parties, etc.). Have a to-go menu: Make small “to-go” packages of leftover items for your guests to take with them when they depart. The band might even appreciate taking a few snacks with them after they've played their set.
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How to Avoid Three Common Myths Standing in the Way of Retirement Security Robert ”Bryan” Burkey, CFP®, CLU, is a Financial Planner with the Prudential Financial Planning Services, a division of Pruco Securities Corporation, a Prudential Financial Company. His office is located at 1300 W. Centre Avenue, Suite 102 Portage, MI 49024..
When asked, most people say retirement is their most important financial goal. Yet, when it comes to actually doing something about it, many of us actually believe, “I'll get to it tomorrow.” But tomorrow comes and we realize we haven't done anything. A retirement strategy is the roadmap that can help us understand where we need to go, where we're going and how to get there. To begin, develop a vision of how you want to spend your time in retirement. In the past, retirement was viewed as an endpoint and people didn't give much thought to what they'd do when they retired. Today, most of
us expect to live longer, healthier and more active lives.How are you going to spend your time in retirement? Will you visit family? Travel? Volunteer? The possibilities are endless but when you do decide, the next step is determining how your choices translate into dollars and cents. So ask yourself: can you afford the lifestyle you envision? Will you have dependents? What will my other expenses be? These are just a few of the questions that need answering, but following through still does not guarantee a dream come true. There are 3 popular myths about retirement that you want to avoid falling prey to. Myth #1 Lower Expenses in Retirement In the past, it's been suggested that a good target for retirement income was 50% to 80% of pre-retirement aftertax income. However, your mortgage might not decrease, your healthcare and insurance costs may increase and with more free time you may tend to spend more money, depending on your situation. In short, you can't just assume your retirement income needs will decrease during retirement. A good tactic is to base your planning on a range of scenarios. Myth #2 My Social Security and Pension will be Enough Traditionally, income at retirement has come from three sources -govern-
ment programs, employer-sponsored plans, and private savings. However, today private savings is becoming an increasingly more important part of the equation. Social Security was never designed as an alternative to personal responsibility. And, the higher your pre-retirement income, the less money you will receive from Social Security. When it comes to employer-sponsored pension plans, the trend in recent years has been for employers to offer Social Security was never designed as an alternative to personal responsibility. And, the higher your pre-retirement income, the less money you will receive from Social Security. When it comes to employer-sponsored pension plans, the trend in recent years has been for employers to offer tax-advantaged retirement savings plans to employees instead of employer funded pensions. One difference is that while a pension plan is guaranteed, a retirement savings plans (401(k) plans are the most popular) are subject to the ups and downs of the stock market. Another difference is that retirement savings plans today are often funded largely with the employee's contributions. If you fail to contribute or make poor investment choices, the benefits you receive from your retirement savings plans could turn our to be less than expected. Myth #3 I Know How Long My Money's Going to Last Life expectancy is on the rise. You may end up being retired longer than you were in the workforce and this can make a big difference in how much you have to save while still working. Your life expectancy can make a big difference. For example, if you start with a retirement nest egg of $775,000 and earn 6% on your money, you can expect to receive about $75,000 per year for 15 years before your money runs out. If you live 20 years in retirement, you will need to start with $915,255 instead of just $775,000, to stay in the money for the duration of life. After dispelling these myths, you may want to recalculate the estimate of what it's going to take to finance the retirement lifestyle you envision. If you're like many people, you may encounter a gap between what you need and what you can expect to have. Your choices are pretty straightforward: • • • •
Delay your retirement date. Reduce your retirement income goal. Increase your savings level. Increase the return on your investment.
A well thought-out retirement strategy is flexible enough to incorporate these changes. A licensed financial professional can get you started and help you monitor your strategy over the years
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LOOK WHO’S
TALKING An Interview with Lori Moore
Photo Courtesy of Ben Jones: Michigan Association of Broadcaster Awards 2008. Lori Moore was awarded for Community Service. Richard Piet was awarded for Best Newscast in Southwest Michigan.
From the Editor: Lori & I met for lunch at one of her favorite restaurants, The Saffron. I was anxious to meet the woman so many of you had recommended for our Look Who’s Talking. She was all that you said and more! I found Lori to be “bubbly” (I warned her that word would certainly show up!) and full of life. She loves Kalamazoo and works hard to stay in touch with what’s happening. Her gift of laughter is wonderful and her enthusiasm for her nonprofit work makes her one remarkable women. Lori, our thanks to you for everything you do! A special thank you for being our Women of the Month. Profession:
Morning Radio Show Host
Hometown:
Beautiful Portage Michigan
Education:
BA Hope College, 1981. Graduate Program –Communications-University of Notre Dame 1990-93
Family:
Husband of 17 years Robert Miller. Daughter Emma Rose Miller
Resides:
Lawton
Almost everybody has heard of WKZO radio’s morning-show host Lori Moore. At least they have probably heard Lori Moore, because she generally makes a lot of noise. In fact, her mother is still in possession of an old report card from Saint Monica’s school which helpfully informs the Moore’s that ‘Lori could go very far if she wouldn’t talk so much’. Moore never really mastered the art of silence; she’s been talking and people have been listening every since. Moore’s voice has been a morning drive fixture in the West Michigan area since 1995. She was the first female morning drive host in the history of WKZO. Lori was recently awarded the Glass Ceiling Award by the Kalamazoo Network. The award is given each year to a woman in the community who has broken through the traditional barriers to obtain success. The recipient is either the “first” or one of a few women among men at her level or in her field, and Moore certainly qualifies on all accounts. She talked with Women’s LifeStyle recently about her trailblazing work in radio…and a few other things. DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’VE BROKEN THROUGH THE GLASS CEILING? “Yeah,” she says with a laugh. “Yeah, I do. Because when I started at the station (WKMI Radio) there were no female disc jockeys, and there are really not that many still. It is really a male dominated field. I worked with the morning team, and they were great and they gave me my start and we had a really
popular show, but then they threw me out on my own. They forced me to break the glass ceiling, so I did. I’m really thankful that they forced me. It’s a very cool award. I was kind of first, so, yay. Thank you for noticing Kalamazoo Network!” DID YOU FEEL LIKE YOU WERE BLAZING A TRAIL? “At the beginning I totally did. When I first started at the station (WKMI Radio) the big promotion was the Miss Skimpy Bathing Suit Contest. There were plenty of girls in it, but I didn’t appreciate it too much, coming out of Hope College and trying to be taken seriously. I didn’t think it was too funny. “It was in my first few months on the air, and I was very vocal on the air about my feelings on the matter. They made a bit out of it, of course. I was giving the female viewpoint, you know. So they had it and certainly didn’t expect that I would be anywhere nearby, but I dressed up in this one piece, leopard print bathing suit from the 50’s with fishnets and high heels and a turban with cat-eye sunglasses and I crashed it. “They were trying to throw me off the stage, and when I took off my sunglasses those guys could not believe that I came. It was a way to make a point, but do it with humor and show that you’re a team player, even though you hate what the team is doing! So, the next year we did a version for the women, a Mr. Tush Contest because they weren’t getting rid of the other, so we made it equal. The next year cooler heads prevailed and they just got rid of it and started the Doodah Parade, which is family fun for everyone. I think I wore them down. Maybe it had run its course, but I think it might still be around if I hadn’t browbeaten them so much. It was vile, and I’m glad I played a small part in getting rid of it, but that was the atmosphere back then.” MORNING DRIVE LISTENERS MAY HAVE HEARD ABOUT YOUR ENCOUNTER WITH A COUGAR ON THE WAY TO WORK AT THE STATION. TRUE STORY, RIGHT? “It was right in front of me. It had the tail, the paws, it looked right at me. I knew it was going to be considered weird, but not that weird. I called the DNR to report it and they told me to lie down and take an aspirin. They said that it was a deer or a German Shepherd or something. “I’ve kind of become the cougar clearing house. People send me all manner of cougar stuff now; articles, emails, stuffed animals. People ask me if I made it up. If I had known what a stir it would cause I might have considered making it up just because it’s been so fun talking to all these people. But the fact of the matter is I truly, truly did see it.” WHAT IS YOUR MOST MEMORABLE JOB RELATED EVENT? “Certainly the most shocking thing that has ever happened is Sept 11, 2001. Breaking news never happens in the morning. I had my brother on the phone from Citibank in New York and he was talking about the first plane hitting the tower. At that time, nobody knew it was a terrorist act until the second plane hit while he was talking to us. Our conversation came to an abrupt end when his building was evacuated. It was so scary. We were trying to get news from CBS television and radio. Nobody knew what was going on. There was a fear that after the Pennsylvania plane hijacking that the terrorist acts were moving east across the country and that Detroit or Chicago would be next. It was just terrifying that morning and for many weeks to come. The tone of our show changed drastically for a long time.” Moore’s day begins with the alarm clock at 3:45 a.m. Somewhere in the day she will squeeze in a top rated radio show, perhaps time for one of the many charities to which she lends her voice ($300,000 raised in 6 years for 37 local charities and the school systems of Kalamazoo County among other charity work). She will be a daughter, a wife and a mother and a best friend. And somewhere she may manage time for an episode of the Soprano’s or perusing the latest installment of the Enquirer (strictly work related research, of course). Where does she find the energy? “It’s all about the nap,” Moore laughs. “I can sleep standing up like a horse, anywhere I am at one in the afternoon. No one ever sees me between 1:00 and 3:00.” Kathleen Allworth is a freelance writer and photographer from Vicksburg, MI. Any questions or comments, you may contact Kathy at: kathyallworth@gmail.com
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hile all dads are different, your dad’s personality may actually determine what steak he enjoys most. Whether he is a mild-mannered filet mignon-loving man or a take-charge dad who always orders a strip loin, a big juicy steak on Father’s Day is sure to please.
Which steak is he? The Omaha Steaks Product Development Team recently conducted an informal survey of customers to determine if there was any connection between the personality traits of individual consumers and the types of steaks they prefer. The survey findings indicate that preferences in favorite steaks are directly linked to a welldefined group of common personality characteristics. Those who prefer . . . Filet Mignons are mild-mannered, tender-hearted, meticulous and enjoy simple elegance. Ribeyes are even-tempered, strive for balance in life and have laid-back attitudes with a bit of a maverick spirit. Strip Loins are passionate and somewhat indulgent, with strong personalities and take-charge attitudes. Mustard-Glazed Top Sirloin
Top Sirloins are mainstream with down-to-earth attitudes and a “what you see is what you get” philosophy of life.
A Steak for Every Dad
courtesy of Omaha Steaks Photos courtesy of Errico Studio
Filet Mignon with Compound Butter Serves 4 4 (8-ounce) filet mignons 2 tablespoons canola oil Salt and pepper Rub steaks on all sides with oil and season with salt and pepper to taste. Grill over direct medium-high heat for about 5 minutes per side for medium-rare, 6 to 7 minutes per side for medium, or to desired doneness. Remove steaks from grill and let rest for a few minutes. Place a slice of compound butter on top of each steak, allowing it to melt slightly before serving. Compound Butter 1/2 cup unsalted butter, at room temperature 1 shallot, minced 1 tablespoon minced fresh flat-leaf parsley 1 teaspoon freshly squeezed lemon juice Salt and pepper Combine butter, shallot, parsley and lemon juice in the bowl of a food processor fitted with the metal blade. Process to blend. Transfer mixture to a sheet of plastic wrap. Roll into a log about 1 1/2 inches thick and twist the ends to close. Refrigerate at least one hour or until firm. Remove from the refrigerator and slice into 1/2-inch coins when the steaks go on the grill.
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Mustard-Glazed Top Sirloin Serves 4 4 2 2 2
(8-ounce) top sirloins tablespoons soy sauce tablespoons dry sherry tablespoons dijon mustard Juice of 1 lime 1/2 teaspoon dried thyme 1/2 teaspoon garlic salt 1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper Preheat and oil the grill. Bring steaks to room temperature. Place soy sauce, sherry, mustard, lime juice, thyme, garlic salt and pepper in a small bowl and whisk together. Brush steaks on both sides with the glaze. Grill over direct medium-high heat for 4 minutes. Turn steaks over, brush again with the glaze, and grill for 4 minutes longer for medium-rare, 5 to 6 minutes for medium, or to desired doneness. Remove from grill and let rest a few minutes before serving.
Blackened Rib Eye Steak With Creamy Horseradish Sauce Serves 4 4 1/4 1 8
(10- to 14-ounce) rib eye steaks cup olive oil cup Creamy Horseradish Sauce (recipe follows) tsps Blackening Seasoning (recipe follows)
Heat a cast iron skillet until very hot, in a well ventilated area. Brush steaks with olive oil. Coat each side of the steaks with 1 teaspoon of blackening seasoning.
Blackened Rib Eye Steak With Creamy Horseradish Sauce
Place steaks in skillet, flipping steaks halfway through cooking. To cook a 1-inch-thick steak medium rare, cook about 4 minutes on first side and 3 minutes on other side. Spoon 2 tablespoons of Creamy Horseradish Sauce on each plate before topping with the cooked steak.
Blackening Seasoning
Yields 1 cup 1/2 cup mayonnaise 1/4 cup sour cream 3 tablespoons prepared horseradish 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice 1 tablespoon green onions, finely minced 1/2 teaspoon sea salt or kosher salt
Yields 1 cup 3 tablespoons sea salt or kosher salt 1/4 cup paprika 2 tablespoons cayenne pepper 1 tablespoon dry oregano 1 tablespoon thyme 1 tablespoon fennel seed 1 tablespoon black pepper 1 tablespoon white pepper 1 tablespoon granulated garlic 1 tablespoon onion powder
Combine all ingredients and mix well.
Combine all ingredients and mix well.
Creamy Horseradish Sauce
Spicy Portuguese Steak Kabobs 6 servings Total preparation and cooking time: 30 minutes 1-1/2 lb boneless beef top sirloin steak, cut 1-1/4" thick 1 red bell pepper, cut into 1" pieces Seasoning: 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro 2 tablespoons olive oil 2 teaspoons hot pepper sauce 1 clove garlic, minced 1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper, optional
Cut beef steak into 1-1/4" pieces. Combine seasoning ingredients; toss with beef. Thread beef and bell pepper alternately onto six 10" metal skewers. Place kabobs on grid over medium, ash-covered coals. Grill, uncovered, about 9 to 11 minutes for medium rare to medium doneness, turning occasionally. Season with salt.
To Broil: Place kabobs on rack in broiler pan so surface of beef is 3" to 4" from heat. Broil about 9 to 12 minutes for medium rare to medium doneness, turning once.
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Experience. For those looking to find a way to build or
Work It!
acquire new skills, try volunteering. Answering phones, providing legal counsel, teaching painting, or helping the elderly navigate their day are just a few ways individuals can give back by using their skills. Employers often place more stock in relevant volunteering experience when it comes to qualifications, because not only is the work directly related to the position, but the applicant was willing to give of their time to gain experience and make a difference.
Yo u r G u i d e t o J o b S u c c e s s
Education. Along with developing your talents, some organizations offer educational venues for their volunteers. Training in public speaking, working with diverse social groups, and utilizing technology such as computers, commercial vehicles and medical equipment are just a few. Another often overlooked value is the opportunity to see new places and experience different cultures. Library bookmobiles, Doctor’s Without Borders, Children’s International and The Peace Corps are prime examples of organizations that provide their volunteers with opportunities to travel locally, or in some cases, see the world.
Job Leads. Not only will you gain relevant experience by volunteering your time and talents, but odds are you will garner job leads. As you mix and mingle with people involved in like causes, you’ll undoubtedly learn about employment openings in your community. You might meet someone who’s connected with an organization you’d like to work for, or perhaps be put in contact with someone who may grant you an informational interview or place your resume in the right hands. Volunteering also provides a platform for you to demonstrate your talents to these key people, to potential employers or to those who hold the ear of decision makers. Networking.
Volunteering offers opportunities to meet new people, learn about a new hometown and gain valuable business contacts. Networking with others who share a common interest not only provides you with a solid circle of friends, but just like the old adage states, through one contact comes another. Before you know it, you have a vast network of people often sharing a similar value set. There’s a wonderful satisfaction that comes with connecting people based on a personal referral. So as much as it is important for you to build your own network, ensure these new relationships are mutually beneficial by connecting them with others who can help them grow too.
The
alue of
olunteering By Kimberly Monaghan
P
recious little beats the intrinsic value one gains from volunteering. The undeniable feeling that stems from contributing your time and talent to help others in need is almost priceless. Yet along with satisfaction gained, not to mention the moral importance of giving back to the community, come the less obvious rewards like experience, education, job leads, networking and sharing quality time with others.
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Family and Friendships. Outside of our obligation to help others, utilizing this type of opportunity to grow as a family is another benefit to volunteering. Whether you gather your friends, co-workers, spouse or children, sharing this experience with others increases the rewards exponentially. The act of giving and being in an environment where others are in need, tends to breaks down barriers, puts everyone on an equal footing, and uncovers buried dreams, emotions and ambitions. When we’re faced with a situation requiring our help, it tends to make our own needs pale in comparison and we begin to look at others around us with deeper insight. Whether supervisors and subordinates, or parent and child, the human element within us is drawn out when we work toward the common good. Volunteering also generates new topics for dialogue, fosters stronger relationships, and ultimately provides a solid foundation for lasting kinship. Regardless of your motivation, there is always value to volunteering. As you give your time and talents to others in need, you’ll no doubt feel rewards that can’t be described in words. But when you do, you’ll discover the reason why there is not an I, but rather a You, in Volunteer.
Kimberly Monaghan is a Certified Professional Resume Writer, freelance copywriter and owner of Career Connections, a career consulting firm. For more information, visit Resumes-writer.com or call (614) 256-2072.
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P H O T O S
B Y
K AT H L E E N
A L LW O R T H
2008 Dog Walk The Kalamazoo Humane Society held it's annual Dog Walk on May 3. It was a beautiful day and everyone enjoyed the sunshine, the fundraising and huge variety of events to choose from. We hope you enjoy these pictures. Counterclockwise from top left: #1 A drowsy pup and his owner relax in the sun at the dog walk. #2 Melissa Marcum, 13, of Kalamazoo, makes a last minute wardrobe adjustment on Target, her two-year-old Pomeranian. Melissa is a student at Otsego Middle School. #3 Thanks for bringing me. #4 Digger, an American Pit Bull, takes a flying leap during the Ultimate Air Dog contest.
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Outdoor Spaces
The American Society of Landscape Architects reports that today’s homeowners are building entire great rooms, including living rooms, dining rooms and full kitchens outdoors. Just as they would when decorating indoors, homeowners are incorporating the latest trends in these new outdoor living areas.
Bolder, Vivid Color After years of blending earth tones with the outdoors, designers are incorporating color into the exterior. Colored glass is being used as an alternative to mulch and stone, and colored concrete is being applied in benches, pavers, fencing and related products. Bigger, bolder flowers are making a statement, as is landscape lighting.
Pretty Potted Plants Flowerpots are being offered in a variety of shapes and sizes, from small, subtle circular pots to large, art-inspired pieces. Embraced for their dual use, lighted urns are turning heads as an innovative way to showcase flowers and add light to the exterior.
Earth-Friendly Accents
Trendy Teak
Green living is more than a trend – it’s a way of life. You can apply environmentally friendly practices and energy savings with landscape lighting too.
Teak has found widespread popularity in outdoor furniture applications, as the wood is known for its durability and natural oils. Suitable for outdoor use, teak continues to emerge in complementary products.
“Many homeowners find themselves outdoors at night, as they settle in after work and entertain through the evening,” says Jeff Dross, Kichler Lighting senior product manager. “Since they’re outside past dusk, they’re leaving their landscape lighting on for extended periods. To help with energy savings, check out the new LED accent lights, deck lights and step lights that all offer white light and, on average, 18 years of life.”
Butterfly Inspirations America’s love of butterflies has grown to new heights with butterfly-themed products across a variety of fashion and decor lines. Butterflies are setting the stage outdoors with butterfly-inspired chimineas, stepping stones and lighting fixtures.
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Complementary Pieces Patterns from outdoor furniture cushions are being carried over to complementary outdoor table placements, candles and other accents. Some companies offer a family of complementary lighting pieces. Kichler’s Garden Collections, for example, pair outdoor chandeliers with lighted urns, birdbaths, path lighting and other landscape lighting items. As homeowners makeover their outdoor living spaces, designers are encouraging them to make a statement by drawing on the latest trends. These influences will bring them more enjoyment in the outdoors, add timeless appeal and may very well make their yard the talk of the town.
For more ideas on outdoor lighting that builds on the latest trends visit www.kichler.com .
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Annuals Perennials Shrubs
Your Complete Lawn, Garden, & Landscape Center
Serving a 5 county area
Feeders Benches Delivery
269-323-8310
9660 Shaver Road Portage, MI romencegardensinc.net Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
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C o n q u e r Yo u r C l u t t e r
How to Live With (and Still Love)
a Male Packrat By Alexandra Fix
I
s the main man in your life a packrat – a collector of things, many things, way too many things? No doubt, it started small. When you first got together, he came with a few boxes. When you bought a home, his mother delivered quite a few more boxes of his things, stored for far too long in her home. Quietly and surreptitiously, he added one small thing at a time and the stash began to grow. Nothing was ever thrown out, because, of course, it might come in handy someday. Over the years you’ve realized that nagging won’t work. Your packrat partner might throw one thing out at your badgering but he may just as likely turn around and take it out of the trash behind your back. If you live with a packrat, you have two choices. Grin and bear it or do something about it. If you’ve chosen the latter, here’s how:
The “Talk”
Baby Steps
Set aside a time to discuss the problem. This will be low on his priority list so maybe you can pair it up with something he enjoys. Why not go out to eat on your way to a sporting event and talk over supper and a beer? Maybe you could exchange his least favorite household chore for some talk time. Maybe you just need to capture him. A road trip that lasts a couple of hours makes him your captive audience. However you can manage it, carve out some time to talk.
It may take more than a single talk session to reach the point of action, but ultimately you need to agree on a plan to tackle the problem. Until the current stash is under control, request a moratorium on adding any more new (or used) things.
Love and Logic Present your case in a logical way. Guys like logic. Don’t get all emotional. Talk about how his packrat ways are creating conflict in your home. Are you constantly searching for things in the pileup? Is there another good use for the cluttered space? Is this costing your family time and money? Are your children following blindly in his footsteps? Is it becoming dangerous to climb over the rubble? In your arsenal, be sure to have some concrete suggestions on what to do with the excess. Who else needs it? Who can benefit? How and where can you donate, discard or recycle the excess?
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Location, Location, Location Consider a location limitation for all of his stuff – one room, one side of the garage, one pole barn. The space should be smaller than the current allotment or you’ll get nowhere fast, but make it too small and you set yourself up for instant defeat.
Begin Together, Then Leave Him Alone Choose a time and begin working together in one area. One item at a time, make decisions. Keep or toss. If keeping, gently begin to suggest an organizing system, designating areas or containers for like items. Accept that his brain does not work the same way yours does and what is “alike” to him and alike
to you may be two very different things. Once the purging and sorting gets serious, have the courage to step away and let him continue in his own sweet way. This may be your toughest moment, but hovering too close will never work. Expect the cleaning to go in short spurts, not the multiple straight hours in a row that you might have envisioned. Accept it and persist day after day.
Use black (rather than clear) trash bags for junk and charity items so there is less looking back, less opportunity for regrets and retrievals. Praise Progress Praise him for his progress. Be patient, nonjudgmental and realistic in your expectations. Act immediately on discards. Use black (rather than clear) trash bags for junk and charity items so there is less looking back, less opportunity for regrets and retrievals. Get the discards out of the house as soon as possible and delivered to their new destination.
Encourage by Example You may think you’re above this problem but we each have our packrat moments. The success of taming your male packrat lies in your continued example of purging and keeping your own stash under control.
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N a v i g a t i n g
t h e
Meat Case Courtesy of ARAcontent
ave you ever paused in front of the beef case at the grocery store, overwhelmed at the choices available? Before your next trip to the local meat case, bone up on the different choices of beef to make your shopping a breeze and make sure you get what you're looking for:
H
Grain-fed beef Grain-fed cattle spend most of their lives eating grass in pastures before moving to a feedlot. While at the feedlot, they are fed a carefully balanced diet of grain and important vitamin and mineral supplements for approximately four to six months. Research shows consumers generally prefer the taste of grain-fed beef because of its tenderness and flavor-enhancing marbling.
Grass-finished beef Grass-finished – or grass-fed – beef comes from cattle that have been raised on pasture their entire lives. While most cattle spend the majority of their lives in pastures eating grass, then move to a feedlot for grain-finishing, grass-finished beef cattle remain on a pasture and forage diet for finishing. Most grass-finished beef is imported from Australia and New Zealand, where grass is in greater abundance than feed corn and grows year-round.
Certified organic beef Certified organic beef must meet the U.S. Department of Agriculture's National Organic Program standards. Organically raised cattle must be fed 100 percent organic feed. In addition, the organic standards require that cattle may not be given hormones to promote growth or antibiotics for any reason. If an animal is sick, it cannot be denied treatment to ensure its health, however, any animal that is treated with antibiotics must be taken out of the National Organic Program.
Natural beef Natural beef must be minimally processed and contain no additives. However, the government's definition of natural does not relate to the way animals are raised or what they are fed. Unlike certified organic products, currently there is no government certification program for naturally raised beef. Many companies have created their own "natural" production guidelines. Common production claims are "Raised without Hormones," "Raised without Antibiotics" or "Corn-fed." Read the label carefully to understand what a particular company means when it says "natural." For more food safety tips along with great-tasting and healthy recipes for all of the choices of beef, visit www.BeefItsWhatsForDinner.com. Funded by The Beef Checkoff.
FYI: If packaging doesn't indicate otherwise on a cut of beef in the grocery store, it's probably grain-fed, because that is the most widely produced kind of beef. Grass-finished beef may have a distinctively different taste and can benefit from alternative preparation methods, including marinades and shorter cooking times. Both grain-fed and grass-finished cattle can qualify for certified organic programs. By USDA's definition, most beef in the meat case is natural, whether the label says it or not.
GRILLED STEAK & ASPARAGUS 4 servings Marinating time: 6 hours or overnight Cooking time: 35 to 40 minutes 1 pound beef flank steak or top round steak, cut 1" thick 2 red onions, each cut into 8 wedges 1 pound asparagus 3 tablespoon red wine vinaigrette Marinade: 1/3 cup red wine vinaigrette 1/2 teaspoon dried basil 1. Chop 4 onion wedges; combine with marinade ingredients. Marinate beef steak in marinade in refrigerator 6 hours or as long as overnight. 2. Thread remaining onion wedges onto two 12-inch metal skewers. 3. Remove steak; discard marinade. Place steak on grid over medium, ash-covered coals. Place kabobs and asparagus around steak. Grill flank steak, uncovered, 17 to 21 minutes for medium rare to medium doneness, turning occasionally. (Grill top round steak, uncovered, 16 to 18 minutes for medium rare doneness, turning occasionally.) Do not overcook. Grill vegetables 9 to 12 minutes or until crisp-tender, turning occasionally. 4. Remove onions from skewers; toss with asparagus and 3 Tbsp vinaigrette. Carve steak; season with salt and pepper. Serve with vegetables.
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Cajun Beef Pepper Steak Makes 4 servings
Things Are Total preparation and cooking time: 30 minutes 1 pound boneless beef top sirloin steak, cut 3/4 inch thick 2 teaspoons Cajun or Creole seasoning blend 2 medium green or red bell peppers, cut into quarters 2 teaspoons vegetable oil 1 package (5.5 to 8 ounces) Cajun or Creole rice mix with seasonings Press 1-1/2 teaspoons seasoning blend evenly onto beef steak. Toss bell peppers with oil and remaining 1/2 teaspoon seasoning blend.
Cajun Beef Pepper Steak
Place steak in center of grid over medium, ash-covered coals; arrange bell peppers around steak. Grill, uncovered, 13 to 16 minutes for medium rare to medium doneness and peppers are tender, turning occasionally. Meanwhile prepare rice blend according to package directions, omitting oil or margarine. Carve steak into slices. Serve with peppers and rice.
To broil: Place steak on rack in broiler pan so surface of beef is 2 to 3 inches from heat. Broil 9 to 12 minutes for medium rare to medium doneness, turning once.
Pesto Chicken & Vegetable Kabobs Servings: 4 Preparation Time: 20 min • Cooking Time: 8 min Marinating Time: 1 hr Grill up some wholesome fun with this flavorful recipe for Pesto Chicken & Vegetable Kabobs. Marinated in a robust pesto sauce, these skewers of tender chicken pieces and seasoned vegetables make a colorful and appetizing entrée. Served with a fresh salad, these kabobs are a perfect addition to the summer season. 1/2 pound boneless, skinless chicken breast halves, cut into 1-inch pieces 1/2 pound assorted vegetables (cherry tomatoes, bell pepper cubes, zucchini wedges, button mushrooms and/or eggplant cubes)
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Grated lemon peel from 1 lemon Juice from 1/2 lemon 1/4 cup BUITONI Refrigerated Pesto with Basil 4 (10-inch) skewers Combine pesto, lemon peel and lemon juice in large, resealable plastic bag. Add chicken and vegetables; seal. Marinate in refrigerator for 1 hour. Thread chicken and vegetables alternately on skewers; discard any remaining marinade. Preheat grill or broiler. (Place kabobs on baking sheet if broiling.) Grill or broil for 5 minutes; turn over. Grill or broil for an additional 3 minutes or until vegetables are tender and chicken is cooked through. Season with salt and ground black pepper, if desired. NOTE: If using wooden skewers, soak in water for 30 minutes before threading.
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Outdoor entertaining is easy with the great taste of mango and white wine.
courtesy National Mango Board and Mirassou Winery
Mango Caprese Salad Makes 8 to 10 appetizers Wine Pairing: Chardonnay 3 large, ripe mangos, peeled, pitted and sliced 8 ounces fresh mozzarella cheese, sliced 3 tablespoons freshly squeezed lemon juice 3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil Sea salt and freshly ground pepper to taste Snipped fresh basil Crusty toasted baguette slices Place mango slices on platter, alternating with mozzarella slices. Drizzle with lemon juice and oil and season with salt and pepper. Sprinkle with basil and serve with baguette slices.
Baja Fish Tacos With Mango Salsa Makes 4 to 6 servings Wine Pairing: Riesling Mango Salsa 2 large ripe mangos, peeled, pitted and chopped 1/4 cup minced red bell pepper 1 tablespoon lime juice 1 tablespoon chopped fresh cilantro 2 green onions, sliced (green tops only) 1 small jalapeĂąo pepper (stem, seeds and membranes removed) Tacos 1 pound cod fillets, rinsed and patted dry 1 teaspoon chili powder 1/2 teaspoon each: ground cumin, Mexican oregano and garlic salt 8 corn tortillas, warmed 2 cups shredded green or red cabbage 1/2 cup crumbled Cotija cheese (may substitute shredded Monterey Jack)
Mango Chicken Lettuce Wraps Makes 4 servings Wine Pairing: Riesling 1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breasts, chopped into small pieces 3 tablespoons soy sauce 2 1/2 tablespoons rice vinegar 2 tablespoons honey 1 tablespoon grated fresh ginger 1/2 tablespoon minced fresh lemon grass 1 large ripe mango, peeled, pitted and chopped, divided
Preheat oven to 425°F. Stir together all salsa ingredients in medium bowl; set aside. Place cod on 2 large sheets of parchment paper. Stir together dry seasonings in small bowl and sprinkle over cod. Bring edges of parchment paper together and fold twice. Fold ends under to enclose fish. Place packets on baking sheet and bake 15 to 18 minutes. Open packets carefully to let steam escape. Place equal amounts cod in each tortilla and top with cabbage, cheese and mango salsa.
1/2 tablespoon sesame oil 8 to 12 small butter lettuce leaves 1/4 cup chopped red bell pepper 2 tablespoons sliced green onion tops 2 tablespoons fresh cilantro leaves, chopped Heat sesame oil in medium skillet over medium heat. Add chicken and cook, stirring frequently, until lightly browned. Stir in soy sauce, vinegar, honey, ginger and lemon grass. Finely chop half of the mango and add to skillet. Cook 5 minutes or until sauce is very thick; let cool. Spoon chicken into lettuce leaves and top each with remaining mango, bell pepper, green onion and cilantro.
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Some of these emotional changes happen without a known cause. Others make sense based on physical changes like vaginal dryness, which can lead to decreased libido; or poor sleep which can lead to other emotional consequences. Over time, women that have too little or interrupted sleep will have more problems with mood changes such as depression, anxiety and irritability.
So what can you do to help combat the emotional changes of menopause? • Talk to your friends and family about what you’re feeling. You may learn from women who’ve been there and find that you’re not alone. • Talk to your health care provider about medical treatments that might help. If needed, estrogen therapy will help nearly all of these problems. Because treatments need to be individualized, talk to your doctor. Sometimes, anti-depressants will help to stabilize your moods to help you through this transition. These medications have the added bonus of helping with hot flashes too! • Talk to a counselor. Mental health care is underused in our culture. Counseling can really help with feelings of depression or anxiety, can improve concentration and memory, and can address any issues that menopause may be bringing up. (Some issues women face include loss of ability to have children, aging parents, your own aging, financial stress and marital issues.)
By Dr. Robyn Hubbard, M.D.
ave you heard about the wildly successful off-Broadway musical “Menopause the Musical,” where two hours of comedic song and dance focus on a woman’s change of life? I saw it in New York with my mom, and every woman in the theater over age 50 was rolling in laughter. Now, I have to admit that I’ve yet to go through menopause. But, as a practicing gynecologist, I will rely on my experiences with patients, friends, and even my mom, to help you understand more about the emotional changes that can come with menopause.
H
The roller coaster of hormones and moods In my experience, any hormonal transition is a set up for emotional changes. Think about puberty, PMS (premenstrual syndrome), pregnancy/post partum and menopause. All of these phases of life are fraught with emotional roller coasters. Now, not all women seem to experience this, and I’m glad that some women can pass through these events unscathed. For me, I have certainly experienced the teary, low self-esteem of puberty, and the happy…no, sad…no, happy moods of pregnancy, and even the snap at your kids at the drop of a hat of PMS. Does any of this sound familiar? I hope to shed some light on the emotional changes of menopause, which are largely caused by hormone changes and their impact on a woman’s body and brain chemistry. We know that menopause is characterized by
a drop off in estrogen production by the ovaries, signaling the end of “reproductive life” (more simply, the ability to have babies.) Even if you are not in menopause, keep reading. These tips will help you with any hormonal change you might be going through.
Menopause can cause many negative symptoms Symptoms of perimenopause (the period of time before menopause) and menopause can include hot flashes, night sweats, vaginal dryness, mood changes, insomnia and others. Let’s focus on the emotional changes that many women experience with menopause. First, let me say that no two women experiences menopause in the same way; it’s as individual as you are. Many women complain of depression (a feeling of sadness), or anxiety (nervousness) around the time of menopause, especially if she has a history of either of those conditions. Other mood changes can include irritability (easy anger), poor concentration and difficulty remembering things. Another common problem during menopause is decreasing sex drive (libido).
• Lifestyle changes. This is important, but difficult. I stress this because it often involves breaking difficult habits. Sometimes it’s easier to just take a pill and have your symptoms go away. Having said that, if you can pull off positive lifestyle changes, you’ll benefit much more than just your emotional health: You will improve you heart health, bone health and whole health. • Diet: Focus on whole foods with a balance of protein, fresh fruits and vegetables, and small amounts of processed or refined foods. This means no fast food! • Caffeine: Try to cut back or eliminate caffeine, a tough habit to break, but you’ll find it to be so helpful with your emotions. • Alcohol: Limit your alcohol intake to one glass of wine a day, or less. More than this can lead to negative mood changes. • Smoking: Stop smoking! New medications are more successful than ever. Really decide to quit and get help from everyone around you, including your health care provider. • Exercise: If you get 30 minutes of cardiovascular exercise five days a week, you’ll see significant improvements in your mood and your physique. • Weight loss: If you’re overweight, working to lose weight will go a long way toward improving your moods. For more information: • North American Menopause Society: www.menopause.org, (440) 442-7550 • National Women’s Health Information Center: www.4woman.gov, (800) 994-9662 Robyn Hubbard, MD is a practicing obstetrician and gynecologist with the practice Grand Rapids Women’s Health. She has three children: 12year-old Hailey, and 9-year-old twins, Christopher and Allison.
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Calendar events
of
It’s easy to get listed in our Events Calendar. Our deadline is the 15th of the month prior to publication. Email us at: wlskazoo@provide.net . Please type Calendar in the subject line. Or you may mail your info to P.O. Box 2284, Portage MI 49081-2284 June 1-June 29 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts The Figure Revealed: Contemporary American Figurative Paintings and Drawings Free admission A KIA exclusive, this exhibition is the first major survey of contemporary American Realist figurative art mounted by a museum in the Midwest in more than a decade. Includes 50 works by 25 artists. June 1 -July 26 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Corporate Wasteland: The Landscape and Memory of Deindustrialization Free admission An exhibition that combines ghostly images of industrial ruins by photographer David Lewis with the words of displaced workers as recorded oral historian Steven High. June 1-5 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Visiting Artist Workshop: “The Art of Bromoil Printing,” with David Lewis Kirk Newman Art School 9 a.m.-5 p.m. daily $310 (discount for KIA members) As one of the world’s foremost practitioners of bromoil printing, visiting artist David Lewis has presented hundreds of workshops on the technique. June 1 – 30 Air Zoo - Ongoing Special Exhibit: Snoopy as the World War I Flying Ace www.airzoo.org June 1 -June 22 Air Zoo Snoopy as the World War I Flying Ace Daily activities and special events each weekend of the exhibit will delight any Snoopy fan June 3 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts ARTbreak: “Corporate Wasteland: The Photographic Vision of David Lewis,” with David Lewis 12:15 p.m. Free The abandoned industrial sites of the Midwest, including the Kalamazoo Allied Paper mill site, are the subject matter of photographer David Lewis. June 3 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Windy City Thunderbolts 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 3 – 15 The Barn Theatre – LEND ME A TENOR Tue. – Fri. 8:30 PM, Sat. 6:00 PM & 9:00 PM Sun. 5:00 PM Located on M-96, west of Augusta. Tickets are $29.00 for all performances.. Information call (269) 731-4121. www.barntheatre.com June 4 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Windy City Thunderbolts 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com
June 6 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Opening reception, Corporate Wasteland: The Landscape and Memory of Deindustrialization and Perspectives on Place: Artistic Visions of Michigan’s Land and Lakes 5-7 p.m. Free admission June 6 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Rockford Riverhawks 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 7 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts (rain or shine) KIA Art Fair Bronson Park, Downtown Kalamazoo 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Free admission The second oldest continuously running art fair in the nation, the 57th Annual KIA Art Fair will bring 200 artists and 60,000 visitors to Bronson Park. Paintings, ceramics, fiber wares, sculpture, photography, mixed media works and more are available for sale. The Art Fair also offers a Children’s Art Yard, a Face Painting Booth and other family-oriented activities. The Rotary Stage has live entertainment throughout the day, and more than a dozen food vendors offer edibles for every taste. Special “sneak preview” sale: Friday, June 6, 5-8 p.m. June 7 Air Zoo Snoopy Exhibit: Dog Agility Demo: 11am, 1pm, 3pm www.airzoo.org June 7 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Rockford Riverhawks 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 8 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Rockford Riverhawks 4:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 9 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Lecture by Susanna Coffey, artist and juror for the 2008 West Michigan Area Show 7 p.m.Free admission June 12 Kalamazoo Regional Chamber of Commerce Afterhours at The Hinman Company 950 Trade Centre Way Portage 5:00 pm - 7:00 pm June 12 Dress for Success Event - Eve Salon 5pm - 8 pm 7117 S. Westnedge Portage FREE Kerastase Treatments ($40 value) for every donation of work attire. Includes a Girls Night out with wine and snacks. Pamper yourself with 20% off all Kerastase Hair Products. Call for more information 269-327-4811 June 13, 14, 15 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Visiting Artist Workshop: “Figure Painting from Life,” with Steven Assael Kirk Newman Art School 9 a.m.-5 p.m. daily $350 (discount for KIA members)
June 5 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Windy City Thunderbolts 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com
June 13-July 9 Blue Water Gallery Richland Feature Art: Heavy Metal and Blues New work by Pat Ex, metal sculptures & Randy Walker, paintings. Tue-Sat. 11 am – 7 pm www.bluewatergallery.com
June 6-September 15 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Perspectives on Place: Artists’ Visions of Michigan’s Land and Lakes Free admission From the KIA Permanent Collection Drop-in guided tours of current exhibitions. Every Thursday at noon Every Sunday at 2 p.m.
June 13 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts “Meet the Artist” reception 6-11 p.m. $125 per person This event offers a rare opportunity to mingle with the artists whose works appear in The Figure Revealed. Evening includes dinner, live auction, & guided gallery walk & talk.
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Greater Kalamazoo
June 13 Unwindings presents Introduction to Integrative Breathwork, a musical meditation for insight, emotional healing & creativity. Linda Adamcz, LMSW. $30. 7 pm - 9 pm Reservations or more info: (269) 388-2988. June 14 – Sept. 1 Kalamazoo Valley Museum - Thomas Jefferson Exhibit First-Floor Gallery: Featuring scientific instruments, furniture, maps, and Native American objects. June 14 Air Zoo Plane of the Month Series West Michigan Smoke Rings Demos www.airzoo.org June 16 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 17-July 6. The Barn Theatre - LES MISERABLES Tue. – Fri. 8:30 PM, Sat. 6:00 PM & 9:00 PM Sun. 5:00 PM Located on M96, west of Augusta. Tickets are $29.00 for all performances. Information call (269) 731-4121. www.barntheatre.com June 17 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts ARTbreak: “The Nude in Art,” with Joshua Diedrich 12:15 p.m. Free Throughout history, the images that fascinate us most and remain with us longest are images of other people.. June 17 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 18 Southwest Michigan Professional Network will meet at Grubb & Ellis Paramount 125 S. Kalamazoo Ste. 203 4:00 pm June 18 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 19 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 20 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 21 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Intermediate and Advanced PMC: Kinetic Pendant Project Workshop Kirk Newman Art School 9 a.m.-4 p.m. $115 (discount for KIA members) Advanced and intermediate PMC (precious metal clay) students are invited to design and execute a pendant with moving parts. June 21 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Hand-painted Yarns Workshop 9:30 a.m.-4 p.m.Kirk Newman Art School $70 (discount for KIA members June 21 Fontana Chamber Arts – Festival Opening 6:00 p.m Venue: Cityscape Events, downtown Kalamazoo In collaboration with the Great Lakes Chamber Music Festival A delectable concert experience that serves up four chamber music groups from the Great Lakes Chamber Music Festival (Southfield, MI) alternated with a four-course dinner menu. Presented in a “progressive” dinner/concert format, the Festival Opening concert has been a sell-out audience favorite.
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June 21 Kalamazoo Valley Museum “The Amazing Castle” A fantasy medieval castle and village from days of yore are the venues for defining what “community” is all about in contemporary times, and it will find a three-month home in the Kalamazoo Valley Museum. The bilingual exhibition is targeted for youngsters -toddlers to pre-teens. June 21 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 23 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Children’s Art Camp 2008: Two-weeklong camps. Finding Inspiration in the Museum (ages 4-K) Kirk Newman Art School 9-11 a.m. daily $145 (discount for KIA members) Summer campers will be inspired by unique and diverse artworks in the KIA galleries. June 23 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts Children’s Art Camp 2008: Week-long camps Finding Inspiration in the Museum (grades 1-5) Kirk Newman Art School 9 a.m.-4 p.m. daily $258, $145 for half-day session (discount for KIA members) Instructors will share the fundamentals and techniques of their two- and threedimensional medium. The three-dimensional media will include ceramics, sculpture, jewelry and glass. The two-dimensional media will include drawing, painting, photography and printmaking. June 24 Kalamazoo Institute of Arts ARTbreak: “The Making of The Figure Revealed,” with Denise Lisiecki 12:15 p.m.Free The Figure Revealed is a major exhibition of contemporary realist painters curated by Denise Lisiecki, artist and head of the KIA’s Kirk Newman Art School. The exhibition examines the revival of figurative realism in America and features such artists as Philip Pearlstein, Gregory Gillespie and Martha Mayer Erlebacher. Join Lisiecki as she discusses her vision of the exhibition provides a behind-the-scenes glimpse of what it took to make it a reality. June 24 You TOO: 6:30 – 8:00 PM Girl Scouts of Glowing Embers Building W. Maple St. – A connecting point for families who have loved ones serving in the military. Volunteers are needed to support our military families. 269-3774626 June 24 Fontana Chamber Arts – Daedalus Quartet 7:30 p.m Venue: First United Methodist Church, South Haven The Daedalus Quartet presents a Haydn marathon.The Quartet will perform all six string quartets from Joseph Haydn’s Op. 20 “Sun” Quartets. June 25 Fontana Chamber Arts – Daedalus Quartet 7:30 p.m Venue: Kalamazoo Nature Center The Daedalus Quartet presents a Haydn marathon.The Quartet will perform all six string quartets from Joseph Haydn’s Op. 20 “Sun” Quartets.
June 27 Unwindings presents Introduction to Integrative Breathwork, a musical meditation for insight, emotional healing & creativity. Linda Adamcz, LMSW. $30. 7 pm - 9 pm. Reservations or more info: (269) 388-2988. June 27 Fontana Chamber Arts – Yuja Wang, piano with the Daedalus Quartet 7:30 p.m Venue: St. Luke’s Episcopal Church, Kalamazoo Gilmore Young Artist presented in collaboration with the Gilmore International Keyboard Festival June 28 Air Zoo Super Science Saturdays: Asphalt Cookies www.airzoo.org June 28 Fontana Chamber Arts – Peter Soave, accordion/bandoneón with the Carpe Diem String Quartet 7:30 p.m. Venue: Carnegie Center for the Arts, Three Rivers “¡Viva Piazzolla!” – A concert program that celebrates the music of Argentinean composer and tango master Astor Piazzolla June 28 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 29 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 4:05 www.kalamazookings.com June 30 Fontana Chamber Arts – Jeremy Denk, piano Venue: St. Luke’s Episcopal Church, Kalamazoo Jeremy Denk’s performance will include George Gershwin’s Rhapsody in Blue. 7:30 p.m June 30 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game – Midwest Sliders 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com July 1 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com July 2 Fontana Chamber Arts – Peter Soave, accordion/bandoneón with Vít?zslav ?ernoch, violin and Nadine Deleury, cello 7:30 p.m Venue: Kalamazoo Nature Center July 2 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05 www.kalamazookings.com July 3 Kalamazoo Kings Professional Baseball- Home Game - Traverse City Beach Bums 7:05
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Conversation Starter: The Senator’s Wife By Sue Miller Alfred A. Knopf, 2008, $24.95
By Alexandra Fix
Barefoot By Elin Hilderbrand Little, Brown and Co., 2007, $24.99 Two sisters and a friend spend the summer on Nantucket Island. Each woman is enmeshed in a private drama of her own and yet each desperately needs the other. Vicki has been recently diagnosed with lung cancer. She will have a summer of chemotherapy at the island hospital, and if successful, will face surgery in the fall. While her husband stays in the city, Vicki is here with her baby and his four-year-old brother. Brenda, the younger sister, is reeling from a scandal in the educational community. She has been fired from her professorship at a Manhattan university for sleeping with a student, an older student with whom she’s fallen deeply in love. Melanie, a friend of Vicki’s, has joined the pair. She too has troubles of her own. After years of infertility, she has found herself pregnant at the same time as she has found out her husband is having an affair. Into the picture, for the summer, comes Joshua, an island native who provides a helping hand, a listening ear, a warning voice and the heart to urge them on to solve their problems and savor a summer of mixed blessings. Believing that “Nantucket sand between your toes” can cure anything and everything, these three women attempt to heal over the long, but too short, summer months.
luxurious chateaus, lonely islands and classic cities set the scene for love and romance. Destination Weddings is a beautiful book of possibilities. The guide features 40 locations for living the dream. Some are quite amazing. Consider this one. At the Icehotel in Jukkasjarvi, Sweden, you can live a magical fairytale wedding. The hotel is indeed made of ice and snow with ice furniture, ice chandeliers and a winter garden. The ice bed features the warmth of reindeer skins and the recommendation that you spend the second night in a warmer, more traditional bed. On the other end of the spectrum, another destination site, in the Cayman Islands, is full of sun, white sand and tropical breezes, in a private veranda, raised above the waters of the Caribbean. There are also plantation destinations, mountain retreats, spa resorts and rustic cabins.
Destination Weddings: The World’s Most Extraordinary Places to Tie the Knot Fodor’s Travel, 2007, $19.95 Many couples today are choosing a destination, miles away from their family home, as the location for their wedding. Exotic beaches, rocky shores,
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This book is a treat for the eyes and the imagination. The guide has a practical side as well, with advice about planning, preparing and packing for a wedding away from home. I love the reminder that you might need one full suitcase for your wedding gown. Couples are alerted to legal requirements for weddings outside of their country of residence and are given suggestions for interesting touches to their ceremony.
Greater Kalamazoo Edition• June 2008
Author Sue Miller has a knack for putting women’s thoughts into words. She has a way of distilling the extraordinary meaning from the ordinary moments of life. Miller’s writing style is smooth and engaging, as always. Her books are a pleasure to read. The Senator’s Wife initially matches the power of her earlier novels, my favorite of which is The Good Mother. That said, the engagement factor ebbs toward the book’s conclusion and I was disappointed with its ending. As the novel opens, Meri and Nathan purchase their first home together, a New England attached townhouse. Nathan has just secured a teaching position at a fine college and Meri has a spin at an exciting radio job. It’s a new world for the young couple as they finally “arrive” at the life they’ve been aiming toward all along. Delia and Tom own the townhouse next door and a friendship evolves. Tom is a former U.S. senator of distinction and Nathan is thrilled with the close proximity of someone he has long idolized from afar. Meri connects with Delia on a less lofty level and just thoroughly enjoys the kind attention of this gracious older woman. The story unfolds as Meri gets to know more about Delia’s secret past and Tom’s not-so-secret past of dalliances and affairs. While this is clearly fiction, Miller makes frequent references to politicians of today and a certain senator’s husband, rather than wife, comes easily to mind. Tom and Delia have lived virtually independent lives for many years, but their political connections and frequent trysts remain a part of their lives. Against this backdrop of love and betrayal, Meri measures her own marriage satisfaction. Delia becomes a vital link in sorting out the enveloping emotional swings of marriage, pregnancy and new motherhood in Meri’s life. This book will most certainly generate some heated conversation. What do you think about the whole “stand by your man” attitude when it comes to an affair? Once, forgiven? Twice, also forgiven? Delia is an interesting character. She’s intelligent, progressive, dynamic and wise or foolish, depending on your perspective. The book’s concluding incident will quite possibly trigger the most conversation. While I had moments of disappointment with the book, overall I was intrigued and unable to put it aside. Read, enjoy and discuss this gem with other readers.
Alexandra Fix is the author of the children’s book, “All Around Michigan: Regions & Resources” (Heinemann Library). She is a librarian, registered nurse, freelance writer and an avid reader. Returning to college, one class at a time while her children were growing up, allowed her to explore her interest in literature and creative writing.
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