Issue 1
working mums
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Hayley Pearson shares her career journey, what she is up to now and her thoughts on juggling work and babies!
EASING FIRST DAY CHILDCARE NERVES BODY LOVING BABES
h c n u a L Issue
HOW TO MASTER DINNER TIME AFTER A DAY FROM HELL TIME MANAGEMENT NINJA RETURNING TO WORK AFTER MATERNITY LEAVE
A car can run on fumes for only so long. It needs to be refilled or it will stop running altogether. You as a mother can’t continue to be everything to everybody, eventually you will break down. You need to take time for yourself, to rejuvenate, to make sure YOU are not lost while trying to hold everything together.
r e t t e l s ’ r o t Edi W
elcome to the launch issue of Working Mums Collective Magazine.
This online magazine has been in the works for quite some time. I had an idea to launch an online magazine while driving to meet a friend for coffee – not only does this magazine support my passion to support working mums but also allows me to use my design skills to bring it to life. I am so thrilled to be launching the magazine as a platform to further support, inspire and empower working mums. This will be a quarterly publication and feature articles around wellbeing, health, stress, self-care, recipes, interviews with working mums and much more. Our cover star for the launch issue is Adelaide based, Hayley Pearson. I was always an avid listener of Hayley when she was on breakfast radio and have followed her journey with her new venture Adelady since its inception. Hayley left radio to create a better balance between work and family and she is doing amazing things. Turn to page 31 to read my interview with Hayley. Being a new year, I’m sure that many of you have set some new years resolutions or intentions for the year ahead. I hope this includes taking time out for you and your own self-care. This topic seems to be something most working mums are interested in and something that I am very passionate about. On page 21 read about how self-care and mama-hood go hand in hand. I am so incredibly grateful for the connections I have made since launching working mums collective and to everyone who has contributed in some way in the journey. Sadly one of the biggest supporters of working mums collective, Kim Williams passed away last September from bowel cancer. Kim was a wellness coach for busy mums helping them discover and achieve their zest for life. She was an incredible woman and I am so grateful to have got to know her on this blogging journey and will be forever grateful for her support and would like to dedicate this launch issue to her. I hope you enjoy the first issue. I would love to hear your thoughts, feedback, comments or suggestions so please email me at info@workingmumscollective.com.au
Sarah xx working mums
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Contents 5. The Importance of Sleep 7. Time Management Ninja
10. How to make maternity leave work for your career
11. The Juggling - Career, Family and Life whilst building a business on the side
15. Can women really have it all?
17. Three easy steps to better understand your finances
19. Becoming a mumpreneur - 3 things to think about
21. Self-care and mama-hood must go hand in hand
23. Returning to work after maternity leave 3 working mums
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25. The power of putting yourself first - What? Isn’t that being selfish?
27. Easing first day childcare nerves
29. What are Essential Oils and how can you use them?
31. COVER STORY
Hayley Pearson on career, Adelady, parenting and her thoughts on juggling work and babies!
35. Story of a 36 week pregnant working mum 37. Wife of a Miner with Minors
39. The who, what, when, where, why and how in finding the right career for you
42. Five minutes with Sarah Thornton,
founder of Yummy Mummy Group Training
45. Is it just stress? Or something more?
47. 9 loving reminders for working mums 49. Travelling with kids - what to pack in the carry on bag
51. Recipes
Buckwheat Pizza Pumpkin Pesto Pasta Raw Caramel Slice Toddler Baked Beans with hidden veggies Frozen Popsicles
57. How to master dinner time after a day from hell
61. They call me mother 63. Body Loving Babes
66. Manifesto for Working Mums
The importance of Sleep Hands up if you would like to get more sleep and wake up feeling refreshed and full of energy, ready to bounce into your day? If your hand is down, there could only be one of two reasons: 1. You are one of those annoyingly bouncy people who go to bed super early with your gym gear already laid out in preparation for your early morning run on the beach/Instagram brag (ok, you can take your green smoothie and leave for yoga now). 2. Your hand is down because you have no energy to raise it, because you are so exhausted by the constant interrupted and/or lack of sleep that comes from being a modern working mother. Now that those pesky perky ladies have left, I am hear to tell you that I completely understand that life can be pretty exhausting when you are trying to spin 346 plates in the air consecutively. However, there are a few basic things that we can do to help ourselves to enjoy a more well rested night, and hopefully feel better equipped to take on the busy demands of each new day. Firstly, and this might come as a shock to some of you, but no one in your family is actually going to notice that you are tired. Does your husband come home from work, notice you’re done in and immediately start preparing a delicious nutritious meal your whole family will eat, whilst offering to give you a foot rub after dinner (um, if he does, then can I please borrow him?) Will your kids take a look at you at 7.00pm and say “Gee mum, you look exhausted. Let me have a shower and quietly put myself to bed while you have a glass of wine and check Facebook.” No, it is up to you and only you to make sure you are looking after yourself, and if you need some help to do that, then guess what? You have to ask for it! Women have been waiting since the dawn of time for 5 working mums
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their husbands to read their minds, and unless you are married to a clairvoyant, I would say the chances of your partner always Once the little darlings are in bed and finally asleep (two very different things, I know!), chances are you are slumped in front of the TV, too exhausted to think of doing anything besides getting yourself a cup of tea and a choccie. Before you know it is late, and you are berating yourself for watching that episode of Sex and the City you have already seen 500 times. By the time you get to bed, have set your alarm (and have one last check of all known forms of social media) you are feeling a little angry and resign yourself to another night of tossing and turning while mentally making to do lists in your head. But it doesn’t have to be that way, and I am here to give you the benefit of my wisdom (or at the very least a few handy tips).
Do not automatically go for the couch and the TV. I have pretty much stopped watching TV in the past few months and my life is much better for it. There might be one or two shows that I actually like to watch each week, so I will consciously sit and watch those. But the days of mindlessly sitting flicking the channels, and watching someone get bad tattoos on 7Mate because nothing else is on are long gone. Ask yourself if this program benefits me in some way, and if not then switch that idiot box off and go to bed (unless there is a movie with Ryan Gosling in it – you are always allowed to stay up late for the Gos!
Use a dump diary. It doesn’t sound as pretty as a gratitude journal, and by all means write down what you are grateful for as well, if that works for you. However, it can be a great help to just dump all the ‘stuff’ that is in your brain in order to stop ruminating on it until the wee hours. This is for your eyes only, so get it all out of your head and onto some paper, no matter how petty or silly you might think it is. Then in the morning, you can transpose what’s important on to your daily to do list, and throw the rest of that brain dump in the trash (recycling of course).
Make your bedroom a warm and inviting space. No, I am not talking about candles and flowers and sexy lingerie (although go for it if you want to). I am talking about the basket of laundry on the floor full of clean clothes that sits there until someone comes scrounging for clean undies and tips them everywhere. Or the bathroom towels that are hanging on the floor. Or the piles of paperwork stacked on your chest of drawers. Even if you just move it out of the bedroom and into another room, having a clean and inviting space to sleep can help to settle the body and mind.
I know you don’t want to hear it, but I am going to tell you anyway. You need to break up with your phone/ iDevice. Your bedroom is not the place for this relationship. Trust me, I have been there, I have canoodled with Candy Crush, flirted with Facebook, and inspired myself with Instagram till the small hours, when in reality I should have been simply seducing sleep. “But my phone is my alarm”, I hear you say. Ha ha, I have told myself this too: just buy yourself a cheap alarm clock, you know you can’t trust yourself! So there you have it, my advice for bringing more rest and less stress into your life. If you are able to make at least one or two changes, then I guarantee you are on the road to getting a better nights sleep. If you manage to score a foot rub as well, then I’d say life just got a whole lot better!
Written by Melissa Jeffcott Melissa is a mother of three and life coach helping women on the other side of forty reignite their spark for life. On her blog ‘The Other Side of Forty’ at http:// www.melissajeffcott.com, Melissa writes about life as she sees it, with plenty of heart and a sprinkling of humour. Melissa is somewhat addicted to social media, and will happily say hello on Facebook: The other side of forty and Instagram @meljeffcott.
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Time Management Ninja Ever since I returned to work after becoming a parent, I have become a time management Ninja. That’s right people, I kick some time prioritising BUTT. I am not entirely sure what I did with my time before I had kids, in fact, this mystery often keeps me awake at night…I mean seriously? What did I do with all that wonderful time??? Because these days, every minute of every waking hour is full of all the millions of things that I now need to squeeze into my day. And don’t get me wrong, I’m also AWESOME at moving things off my list and re-prioritising with amazing effectiveness (that’s part of the Ninja magic). It was quite a pivotal moment in my work life balancing juggle when I realised that you really can’t do it all, and actually, some things aren’t as important as you thought they were. I was at work and I’d been called into an urgent meeting. Things were going south and suddenly a whole heap of things were piled onto my “to do” list unexpectedly. I looked down at my list and felt horrified. There was no way I was going to get all this done before I had to go and pick up the kids from Child Care (where the iron door of doom closes at precisely and exactly 6pm). So I chose the top three most important things, got them done and then packed up my laptop knowing full well I would be logging on after the kids had gone to bed and probably working until midnight.
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I raced out the door and managed to grab the kids just in the nick of time before 6pm and everyone turned into a pumpkin. Just as I started driving off, my son said “I don’t feel very well”. “You’ll be fine I said, we’ll be home in 5 mins”…next thing I know, I hear the dreaded retching in the backseat and turn around just in time to catch my son projectile vomiting across the whole car and my daughter, who is (not surprisingly really) now screaming at the top of her lungs. OK…so…priorities just shifted. Hours later, I was on my hands and knees, still picking out bits of vomit from between the seats (what the hell did they give them for lunch)… and I suddenly remembered my remaining list of “to do’s” from work that I hadn’t even touched. At that moment, I had an epiphany. I realised that my work items weren’t actually that important. They could easily wait until tomorrow. When I was at work they felt like the most important thing in the world. But now, with some well-timed vomit perspective, I realise that they never were that urgent. And so…this is where my training as a Time Management Ninja commenced. Each day I wake up a write a list of things to do, then I methodically break them down into the most important and most urgent (and a list of things that might be nice if I get done but realistically speaking there is a high chance they won’t happen…and that’s OK). When I arrive at work, I do the same again for all my work action items.
I start my day by trying to crack off the most important items from the list, and everything else I try to figure out when I should be able to fit them in. My Ninja skills have become so practiced that I now also apply them to finding “me time” (e.g going to the toilet on my own) and ensuring that I have time to exercise each day. But, sometimes, I forget one of the most vital pieces of the puzzle, something only a seasoned Time Management Ninja has learnt the art of. And that is, making sure you also clear some “empty” space into your priorities. Trust me, by the end of the day this empty space will very very rarely actually be empty. Inevitably as the sun comes up, something in your day will not go quite to plan. A child who can’t find their shoes just before you are about to walk out the door (one day, when I become the uber amazing super woman I always dream I will be, I will buy 10 pairs of shoes for each of my children, so when the monster that eats shoes ,which clearly lives on our house, takes yet another pair…we have plenty of spares), an urgent work meeting or an appointment that is delayed …or…you’re child vomits unexpectedly.
Written by Claire George Claire works in the corporate world where she has been lucky enough to have a successful career and she loves what she does. She is also a mum, and she loves being a Mum. When it seems like everyone else has it all together... Claire is still practicing her skills at being a less than perfect parent, trying to figure out how to juggle all the things she loves and still be AWESOME. She shares the stories about the self doubt, fear, guilt, anxiety, love, joy, anger and happiness she feels everyday, so maybe other women won’t feel so bad when they feel like they don’t have it all figured out - Confessions of a Corporate Mum www.clairegeorge.co
And so people… the ancient art of time management is an essential working parent skill…and I’m so glad that I’ve learnt it, because now I think I’m ten times more efficient and effective than I used to be. I don’t waste my energy on things that aren’t important in the long run and I still get the important things done. Nothing like a little bit of vomit in the back seat, to kick start your warrior training.
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Elle Hill is a handcrafted, personalised, jewellery brand. Elle Hill personalised jewellery is timeless in design and exquisite quality. We believe in being kind to ourselves, one another and the environment as reflected by our eco-friendly packaging and production practices. Elle Hill celebrates all that is beautiful and shows gratitude for every moment.
www.ellehill.com.au
How to make Maternity Leave work for your career. If there is one thing we hear again and again from mums on our workshops, it’s how even the shortest of maternity breaks seems to create the biggest hiatus in their career’s. We find a number of our mums are facing into cases of isolation, lack of confidence and imposter syndrome when they return to work after having a baby. If you are currently on maternity leave or about to start your maternity leave, and plan on returning to your employer here are 3 of our many ideas on how to strategically manage your career break by keeping your hand in while your head is out of the workplace. Become a learning junkie – Yes we all agree that the learning never stops when you become a mum but we find that by keeping your brain cells active on topics related to your job rather than the very important feeding, changing and winding really aids your confidence when it comes to returning to work. And for those of you that find the concept of learning daunting due to time or expense please be reassured that there are some amazing resources out there that offer affordable and sometimes free online, short courses. If you don’t believe us check out edx. org or coursera.org for free online courses from top US universities.
Be the one to stay in touch – Some employers tend to feel that mums on maternity leave are best not interrupted and we need to be the ones to remind them that we don’t want to be forgotten even if we are up to our elbows in shall we say less than desirable bodily fluids! For those mums out there that feel left out we highly recommend you increase your visibility and arrange times on a regular basis to visit the office go for a coffee or even attend a departmental monthly meeting. Network and bring your kids – I am sure for some of you the thought of networking and managing a child at the same time sends you into spasms of hysteria but hear us out. You will be surprised at how many people you know in your network that are mums, work part time and would be up for a play date/catch up. It doesn’t have to be an intense career chat but it helps you stay connected with what is going on either back in the workplace or in your industry. If you can’t manage all these suggestions, try just one and see how you feel afterwards. Keeping your mind alert to work orientated thoughts is good. But we want to leave you with the thought that never forget the most important aspect of taking maternity leave is to enjoy being a mum. Written by: coaching4mums
The Juggling
Career, Family & Life whilst building a business on the side!
Have you ever heard the saying – “if you really want something, you’ll find a way….you’ll find the time… the money?” Well I’m here to tell you that it’s absolutely true. If you really want something, you’ll work out how to make it happen. As a mum to two small people, wife, corporate professional four days a week, business owner and coach to women in business, I get asked all the time – “how do you do it, or how do you find the time?” I usually respond with that exact phrase – If you want something bad enough, you’ll find a way! Running a business whilst holding down a job and running a household is not for the faint hearted but it is for the whole hearted. Do you have a desire to do something else? You dream about flexibility, doing something you’re passionate about, doing something you love and earning money to give you options? Well I’m here to tell you that it’s possible. It’s not easy, but it’s totally possible. If you’re one of these passionate trail blazers, then here are a five tips from someone in the know when it comes to building your business and making it work with a corporate job in tow.
1) Let it be known!
Letting those around you know what you’re doing is key. If your partner or family can support you here and there to have more time to build your business then it will be a huge benefit. So how could this conversation potentially go? “Honey I’m looking at starting a business. I’m really passionate about X and I want to give it a go and start to get the ball rolling. I would really love your support. It also means that 2 nights a week I’ll be working on my business. I may also need you to help a little more with X.” Having the courage to have a conversation with your partner or support system is key as it means that the responsibility for EVERYTHING isn’t always down to you.
2) Surround yourself with amazing people
I like to call them my #bizbesties. They are the women I’ve connected with during my business building journey. They understand the ups and downs and have skills in areas that I don’t, making them great sounding boards when I need help. I know from working with a lot of different women that not all families are supportive, so it’s key that you ensure you surround yourself with positive people who can help you build the business you really want. #Bizbesties can help you take your business forward faster than if you just play by yourself, so get out there and get networking and building relationships.
3) Set Clear Boundaries & key working times
The frustration can set in when you’re trying to work on your business s and your ‘day job’ at the same time – whether that be at home as a mum or in the corporate world. There is guilt, confusion of priorities, procrastination and shuffling because you know you’re supposed to be doing one thing but you’re actually doing something completely different. When you’re not fully focused, it’s easy to waste time and get lost under the weight of it all. Set aside specific times during the week, outside of your corporate job hours and family hours that is just to work on your business. It may be two or three nights a week or like me a whole Wednesday as I work 4 days a week. By having this time set aside you know that you can really dive in and do the things you need to on that day or evening. Having clear times in your mind will allow you to relax because you know your business time is coming and you really focus on whatever task you have to hand now.
4) Get Clear
Get clear on what you need to do and work on one thing at a time. Focused time and effort will always produce higher quality work than if you’re flying working mums
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here and flitting there trying to do everything at once. So many people ask me, where do I find the time to run a business and work a corporate job and the answer is that I use the time I have. Think about your day and break down in detail. You could use your commute time to plan your days, explore your ideas and write to do lists. What are you doing at night? My kids go to sleep at 7.30pm and then if I’m honest there is very little (meaning absolutely nada) on TV that I want to watch, so I sit on the couch and work on different things. As they say, if you really want to do something you’ll find the time. There will be hours that you waste away in your week, so it’s time to get focused and make it happen!
5. Learn something new every day
Running and building your business is a learning experience. You’ll not only be delivering the product or service you want but you’ll need to work out how to sell your services, record your cash flow, master social media and marketing plus so much more. Look at this as an amazing
opportunity to really stretch yourself and learn new things.
Don’t give up your day dream, find a way to make it work because if it’s what you really want to do then it’s totally worth the effort!
Written by Suzanne Chadwick Suzanne Chadwick is a Business & Brand strategy coach at suzannechadwick.net and the CEO of The Connection Exchange providing coaching, training & events for women in business and supporting them to build their business, brand and bottom line. A mum, wife and corporate professional, Suzanne works with women to navigate building their business from scratch. As an international conference speaker and trainer, Suzanne also coaches women to create the ‘Power Personal Brand’ through public speaking and Owning the Stage. You can find and connect with Suzanne on Facebook, Twitter & Instagram.
“Successful mothers are not the ones who have never struggled. They are the ones who never give up, despite the struggles”. Sharon Jaynes
The point we’ve missed is that having it all is actually the pursuit of happiness. Not perfection, happiness (and really - the two are like opposing magnets pushing each other away).
Can women really have it all? Can women really have it all? It’s the ubiquitous question - “can women have it all?” In terms of the chaffing questions that women are asked (and there are many) that’s perhaps only pipped by “so, when are you due?”, as a wellintentioned stranger pats your belly full of pasta. You may be scratching your head and thinking that it’s not such a bad question - I used to think it was perfectly harmless myself - so I’ll explain why I don’t like it. Asking women if they can have it all is effectively pointing out that they currently don’t. Oversensitive? I think not. Have you ever been sailing through your day, feeling fabulous, when someone leans in looking concerned, “Honey, do you feel alright?”. Immediately your sunny disposition starts to cloud. You start to question yourself. I thought I felt good, hang on a second... do I feel well? I did feel a little tired when I woke up this morning. I did get puffed on my morning run. Am I sick?! That is what the “can women have it all” question is doing to the women of the world. Whether you are an entrepreneur, office worker or a stay-athome mum, it plants the very stubborn seed in our collective psyche that we are not enough. That we need to do more, be more and have more before we can be happy. That question is the shopping trolley that hits smackbang on our Achilles heel, telling us that our lives don’t look the way they are meant to. But we’ve missed the point. We’ve confused “having it all” as being perfect. “It all” is a predefined societal construction that only leads to us doubting, comparing and pushing ourselves. We are constantly chasing a receding horizon and exhausting ourselves in the process. The point we’ve missed is that having it all is actually the pursuit of happiness. Not perfection, happiness (and really - the two are like opposing magnets pushing each other away). Which makes
the “can women have it all” question seem all the more ludicrous, because how can anyone, other than you, define that? And therein lies the answer to the question that launched a thousand morning show segments; can women have it all? I believe that yes they can… as long as they let go of the idea that it should look perfect. That they understand that having it all rarely means having it all at once. That it takes compromise and courage to say exactly what you want for life and then to do exactly what you need to get it. You may have to work extra hours, away from your children, which then affords you more family holidays or to live in the suburb you want by the beach or the fulfillment you need to be a more patient parent. You might spend more time with your children, but have to compromise in terms of remuneration received. All we know is that each comes with compromise (some would say sacrifice) and that each is as personal to you as the way you take your vegemite. No one can tell you the balance of flavours that’s right to your taste apart from you. So the next time you see that question being flashed around on the glossy magazine covers, sit comfortable in the knowledge that you have the answer already. It might just be different to the answer everyone else gives. Written by: Emily Ehlers Emily Ehlers is a writer, coach, speaker and artist who moonlights as a mama and rebels against modern day seriousness. She believes in the power of words, play and camembert. Emily is the go-to copywriter for gutsy solopreneurs with a hankering for authentic expression. She loves nothing more than finding the perfect word combinations to not only spread their world-changing message but to also capture exactly who they are. She’d love you to drop by for a play-date at http://www.emilyehlers.com.au or sign up to her awesome newsletter here where you will receive weekly wonderings and a kitten* straight to your inbox. *Kitten not included. working mums
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Three easy steps to better understand your finances. The other day I had the privilege of watching Miss eleven graduate from Year six. With tissue box close at hand, I listened to her sharing her memories and felt that amazing glow of pride that every Mum feels. You know that amazing feeling of witnessing your child grow from a helpless bundle, to a toddler and then to an independent person. For me, eleven years have certainly flown by. I remember sitting, gazing at my babies, feeling giddy from being so in love for the first time. Wondering how on Earth something so beautiful, was all mine. I remember the sleepless nights and the new challenges we faced as we wondered why there wasn’t someone on this planet who could answer our “How do we?” questions. I also remember the day the decision needed to be made on whether to return to my job or not. I certainly had not missed the pressures and politics that came with being the Administration Manager for a nationwide training provider. One night, I sat down with my husband and told him I really didn’t want to return to my previous workplace. I felt confident I could start a business providing bookkeeping services for small businesses. “Give me six months to a year,” I said “If it doesn’t work out then I’ll get a job.” Forgoing a full time salary for a dream certainly was no snap decision. Working with numbers and being organised had always been my thing. So for the next two years I worked hard. I was fortunate to find amazing childcare in the home of a kindergarten teacher, who was 17 working mums
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herself, on maternity leave. When number two arrived, there was no paid materity leave which made the juggling of our finances even more challenging. This financial juggle is something every working family goes through on a regular basis. These days, I educate the female clients I work with on their finances, based on my expereinces. I teach them to become their own finance interpreters so that they gain a sense of confidence and control when it comes to the finances in their lives. I like to think of the relationship we have with money like the relationship we have with a best friend and give my clients the following advice.
Step 1 - Getting to know your BFF. Once upon a time, you met your BFF for the first time. You didn’t really know them. But the more you got to know them, the more you liked them. This can also be true when it comes to your finances. At first you might not even know what to look for or what you are looking at. It may seem a bit scary and daunting at first but in time you get to know your own spending habits and those of your family. The more knowledge you acquire and greater clarity you achieve, will make it easier and less stressful to make decisions on what to do financially for your family, when to do them and how it impacts your lifestyle.
Step 2 – Keeping in touch with your BFF. In my opinion, in order for friendships to sustain, flourish and grow, you need to keep in
regular contact. I also believe this is the case with your finances. It’s too ‘easy’ to pop it onto the credit card or dip into your overdraft without a care. Don’t do yourself a disservice with your hard earned money. I’m not a party pooper, I like a good shopping spree like every other girl, however I know exactly what there is to spend and when I can spend it. Why not start by writing down in a notebook (or a notes app if you prefer) the money you spend in a month. What can you see? How many necessary items did you buy (rent, electricity etc.) versus how many spontaneous ones (like coffees, lunches etc.)? Perhaps you might consider giving yourself a cash allowance (pocket money like your kids might have), once this is gone, it’s gone and that might make you rethink how you spend it in the future.
and work out a plan of how to achieve these. Whether you are a Mum in the workforce or if you run your own business - this is a great framework to begin with.
Written by Yvonne Morrison Yvonne Morrison is the Chief Cheerleader at The Business Boutique. The Business Boutique is for womenpreneurs who want to learn to understand the business side of business whilst connecting with a like-minded community of female Entrepreneurs. This is available through her signature program “Love Your Numbers” or through personal coaching.
Step 3 – Making an unbreakable promise to your BFF. In true friendship, nothing would or could break a promise made. A promise is a promise, right? Once you know your money, you need to show this same commitment to financial goals you’ve set for yourself. Keep a promise and give yourself permission to be your money’s best friend. Ask questions like, can I afford it this week or can it wait till next pay day? Is this a need or a want? (Don’t we say this to our kids all the time?) Are there ways to put some money aside to help me reach my financial goal? Either setting up an automatic payment that comes out of your bank each week or consider asking the lovely Payroll Administrator at work to split your wages for you. These three easy steps are a great way to help get you started with understanding your finances. Get to know the money that you have. Keep track of how you use money (set yourself limits and a budget). Finally set goals working mums
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Becoming a Mumpreneur - 3 things to think about. Love it or hate it, Mumpreneur as a word seems to be a fixture in our vocabulary. It has emerged as a term to help describe the growth in mums choosing to set up their own business rather than return to the conventional workplace. There are lots of reasons why some mums make this choice - they have had a great idea for a business, they cannot find employment on the terms they want, they like the idea of working at home in their PJ’s. Whatever your reasons might be for going down this path there are a couple of things to think about first. Time. If your desire to slop around at home
running your business in your jeans is driven out of a belief that you can work the hours you want to when you want the response to that is ‘yes’ and ‘no’. Yes you can definitely dictate set hours you won’t work, like 3pm when you pick up the kids from school. But no because if you think setting up and running a business is a part-time job, its not. You are going to find yourself on it way more times than you even planned for. Evenings, weekends, cramming in half an hour first thing in the morning, these are realities for lots of mumpreneurs. So when you start down this path estimate how many hours a week you need to put in to grow your business, then double it, double it again and then think about when in a week you can do those hours.
Money. The reality is most businesses need
money to get them going. Even if you are based at home, you will have some overheads. There are always extra costs regardless of sector you work in. For example, if your business idea is about offering a service to others you have to think about the cost of marketing your business, whether it be building a website, business cards or advertising. And don’t forget if your child is not school age, you 19 working mums
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have to cover childcare costs too. All this will be against a backdrop of no or intermittent income in the early days, so make sure you draw up a financial plan that projects forward costs and income with sound assumptions of how long till you break even. And then circle that date and buy a bottle of bubbles ready to open when you make it.
Confidence. A recurring theme around
women in work, imagine being your own boss and having to bolster your confidence on your own daily. On the plus side you can give yourself a cracking year end review. On the down side when your confidence drops you can find yourself feeling very lonely. Our advice - find yourself some cheerleaders. When you start down the road of setting up your own business, identify someone who makes a good business mentor for you, someone who makes a good skill set coach for you and someone who makes a good martini for you. If you have a backing team behind you when you hit those road bumps they will help support you through them. Of course the biggest thing of all is enjoy yourself! If you find yourself with a passion to work for yourself on an idea you have had for years then blooming well make sure you get a kick out of it every day. Lay yourself open to grow, develop and enjoy the journey. And yes you can wear jeans to work every day if you want to.
Written by: coaching4mums coaching4mums is the brainchild of Nina Marshall and Vanessa Potts. They felt that mums were being neglected by society, organisations and themselves when it came to their careers and set up coaching4mums to work with you, not your employer, to empower you and to focus on you, your career and your family.
www.dresstemple.com
Self-care and mama-hood must go hand in hand. Becoming a new mum is a massive shock to the system and your life. I know for me I thought I could do it all…look after a new born, run my own business, study, do the housework and be a wife, but no, it doesn’t work that way. Before I had my daughter I prayed that I would be a calm and present mama bear. I didn’t want to sit on my phone all the time in front of her or be distracted by thinking about my business; I wanted to support her when she was having a bad day (you know those days were baby doesn’t stop crying?), play with her, laugh with her and watch her learn and grow. I didn’t want to get unnecessarily frustrated with her because I was trying to do it all and not succeeding, how is that fair on her?! And to be honest, I do have times where I need to pull myself up and say “hang on a minute, take a breath and sort out your thoughts right now” but I have noticed a huge reduction in this when I allow myself space for me. My daughter wins just as much as I do. As mum’s we are always giving, giving, giving but to give so much and not get back is just taking the fast road to exhaustion and 21 working mums
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frustration. We can only give so much until we have nothing left to give, so wouldn’t you rather take a bit of time each day to just give yourself space to feel good, to feel relaxed and happy. Ummm yes please! After almost burning out and ending up in a heap in my shower crying, I turned back to my spiritual practices which had fallen to the way side since becoming a new mum. These practices make me super happy, present and calm. I love grounding myself outside in nature, colouring in, reading, watching trashy TV, meditating (when I can), journaling, pulling angel cards, and just having space for me and no one else (a true introvert right here). I hadn’t ‘had the time’ to do these things since becoming a mum but my mind and spirit were yearning for me to do these things again. I needed them to feel like me, my own independent woman. Because let’s face it, you can be a mum and your own person; one doesn’t have to disappear because of the other. Making these practices and routines a nonnegotiable in your life is super important for your own mental wellbeing but also being a
better mum and overall person. Ask yourself, what did I used to love doing that I no longer do since becoming a mum? Write these things down and make a self-care list for yourself. They can be as simple as enjoying a cuppa outside in the sunshine, reading a book, having a bath, booking yourself in for a facial or going for a walk. No matter how big or small, write them down. You could even put them into categories of how long they will take. Keep this list somewhere handy so that you can refer to it when you have some quiet time. Make the time each week or even better, each day, to spend time doing those things. It doesn’t have to be a huge amount of time, just 15-20 minutes, when your baby or kids are napping. I promise you the washing will be there for you later, it won’t go anywhere. Filling up your own cup is a must as a mum; it makes you calmer, happier and more grounded. Your child/ren will notice the difference (they pick up on our moods very
easily) and so will your partner, mother, sister, friends and colleagues. A happy mum equals a happy family! Written by: Kylie Anderson Kylie is the founder of Be Your Radiant Self and is a holistic health & wellness coach, personal trainer, writer & blogger, angel card reader and mama. Her mission in life is to inspire and support spiritual mamas everywhere on their journey to coming back home to themselves and reclaiming their identity after having a baby. Kylie realised the importance of this after having her daughter and going through the process of feeling lost and yearning for the soulful space to just be herself. Being a mum is everything to her but she knows the importance of filling up her own cup so she can be the best mum she can be. From learning and experiencing this she realised she wasn’t alone in feeling this way and in turn decided to help other women get back on track and lose the mama guilt.
PERSONAL STYLING. WARDROBE EDITS. WORKSHOPS. FREELANCE WRITER. 0422 373 781 www.facebook.com/stylingcurvy www.stylingcurvy.com
Returning to work after maternity leave Returning from maternity leave can be exciting but more often than not it comes with the mixed emotions of uncertainty, anxiety and some pressure regarding how you are going to make it all work! Not only will you be figuring out the child care arrangements but will also be preparing for spending some time apart from you little one (gulp*). Don’t worry, you have options In Australia you are required to give a minimum of 4 weeks’ notice before you return from Maternity Leave. I suggest that you continue to keep in touch regularly throughout your time off and start discussions early to plan for your return to work. Reach out and schedule a coffee with your manager (baby in tow is fine). This is a great way to get up to date on who is new, who’s left and explore if there have been any changes to the functions or projects your team are supporting. Having an informal chat is also a great way to start sowing the seeds about what support you are looking for in coming back to work.
The legal in’s and outs The Australian National Employment Standards allow for women returning from Maternity Leave to request flexible working arrangements. Ok Cool …..But what does this mean? Basically it means that you have the right 23 working mums
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to ask to return to work part time for a fixed period of time or to change your working hours to allow you to pick up and drop off children etc
How do I do this? • Any request you make needs to be in writing • Spell out what you are looking for and why. • Be specific, and let them know how long you would like this arrangement to be in place. • Your employer then has 21 days to assess your request and provide you with a response (hence why the earlier you start these conversations the better!)
What happens if they don’t accept my request? An employer needs to assess your request to see if it is operationally feasible. They can only refuse a request on “reasonable business grounds”. That sounds like an easy excuse – In English what does this mean?
Although this can be stressful, keeping calm and participating in the solution will go a long way.
Managing the outcome If your employer is not able to meet any or enough of your flexible working requests you will need to consider your next steps. If you have only taken 12 months of leave you could have the option to request another 12 months to see if either your situation or the employer’s situation could change during that period of time. If this is not an option then it may be time to explore other new opportunities outside of the organisation that will fit with your professional and family needs. TIP: If you are unsure of the internal processes that apply to your workplace or think that your manager may have made a mistake then contact a member of the Human Resources Team. You can also seek external help from Fair Work Australia if need be. Source: http://www.fairwork.gov.au/employeeentitlements/flexibility-in-the-workplace/flexibleworking-arrangements
Your employer may refuse your request if: • The request is significantly costly for the organisation • Your request would mean that the hours or job of another person would need to be changed • The request would result in a significant loss of productivity or have a negative impact on customer service
Written by Tania Morgan Tania is officially (and professionally) a modern day “Slashie”. For the last 10 years she has been proud to call herself a Human Resources Professional. But now, in her early 30’s she is so much more than that guiding go getting professionals and entrepreneurs as a Transformational Coach/ Facilitator/ Writer and Yoga Teacher.
The art of negotiation Guess what – Just because your boss can’t accept all of what you have asked for doesn’t mean that you can’t come to a compromise. Keep the communication open, be willing to explore the options and ask genuine questions. Be curious to find out what could be accommodated. Remind them of the value you can add to the organisation and point out any benefits your proposal would bring to others. working mums
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The Power of Putting Yourself First - What? Isn’t that being selfish? Does any of this sound familiar? Multi tasking with love-most of the time Family comes first. You treasure your children, partner and extended family (at least the ones that are welcoming)-but there are times when you wonder if you will ever have any real ‘me’ time to refuel. Work-in or out of the home - is a close second and sometimes a first! The housework, meal prep, school drop off and pick up are squeezed in somewhere. And then there is the ‘Mum I forgot to tell you I need a $2.00 gold coin today for a class project’ five minutes before you all get into the car for school drop off. As Murphy’s Law would have it, today there are no gold coins anywhere in the house, car-or even buried in your handbag. And you can’t even round up enough silver coins to make up $2.00! School, childcare or bus stop drop offs are done and you head to work or home to do more of what you have on your long list for today. Self care is not selfish but self-full! 25 working mums
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Does the thought of putting yourself first seem selfish---or impossible? Does it feel like you’d be neglecting your responsibilities or time with your family? The opposite is true. Refuelling yourself and restoring your energy fills you up with more to give to others—including yourself! Imagine taking a walk with a friend and you have a full bottle of fresh, clean water. It’s a hot day and you’ve gone through the whole bottle halfway through the walk. You and your friend stop for coffee before you continue walking. The café has a filtered water tap for bike riders and walkers to fill their water bottles. You fill yours, and resume the walk with your friend after the coffee break. 20 minutes into the the walk your friend-who did not bring a water bottle- starts to feel lightheaded. You not only brought one, but filled it up at the café, so you have plenty to share. She takes three or four big gulps. She feels 100% better ready to forge ahead. And you have plenty left over for yourself. What if you had not filled the bottle? You would have had nothing to give her and when you got thirsty you also would have been in strife as well. It is the same with refuelling ourselves by taking some time out to re-charge so we have
a full ‘bottle’ of energy to share with those who need our support. It keeps us from going through our days in an exhausted daze. But let’s get real. Time is scarce We have multiple responsibilities and very little time left over for indulging in true self care. Don’t give up---just take small steps. A 15-minute cup of tea focussing on something you are looking forward to. Mindfully enjoying the cup of tea. Reading one article from a magazine to shift gears. Or take a short walk (if time is limited) around your neighbourhood or office. No time? Why not do this while your toddlers are napping, your children are at school, or you take a short break from your desk at work. Any of those short breaks can be stress circuit breakers to return you to your busy day more refreshed with more energy. Small steps-and new habits- can lead to big changes. What will you do for yourself this year to fill your ‘bottle up’ to better enjoy life, have
more energy and be a more effective (and fun) parent, partner, worker and friend? Would you like a fun way to try some small step new habits for 30 days? Click on the link http://www.lindachaousis.com/ newhabitsnewlife/ to find out more about New Habits-New Life 30 days of small habits for fun, abundance and wellbeing-and get some of those habits to help keep those new year’s resolutions going strong! It starts January 31st.
Written by: Linda Chaousis Linda Chaousis is the author of Beyond Positive Thoughts-live your life by design, not default and is a speaker and facilitator of events to help people find their path and achieve their goals and dreams.
g n i m o C Soon!
new habits, new life 30 days of small steps to create more abundance, wellbeing and fun! www.lindachaousis.com
Easing first day childcare nerves Returning to work and putting your child into a child care centre is a big step not only for you but also your child. Here are a few things that you can do to prepare you and ease the first day childcare nerves.
Hide your feelings from your child You may be experiencing a range of different emotions when you drop your child off and go back to work for the first time. If you show them your emotions it is likely that they will feel the same way and pick up on your emotions. Try to keep positive and only express the positive feelings of excitement to your child.
Encourage your child to be excited Talk about all the fun things that your child will do at child care. Get excited when you go in and after your visits. If you are excited, they will pick up on it and get excited too. It may help to ease their anxieties and if they are excited, it will make it easier for you too. 27 working mums
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Build trust with the centre staff
When choosing a centre, visit with your child and see how they react to the staff and the environment. This will start to build the trust with the staff for both you and the child. Make a few visits to your preferred centre before your child starts so they are familiar with the faces, the children and the environment.
Transition with short days In the weeks leading up to your return to work, set out a transition plan for your child. You may start with one hour where you stay in the room with them and then extend the period’s of time they spend there. You could stay at the centre in the parents room while your child interacts and gets to know the staff and children or you could schedule some visits to drop them off for a couple of hours. Each centre is different so check with them about transitioning your child into child care.
Have a plan for the first day drop off Work out in your head or talk to the staff about the first day drop off. Your child may be ok but they may not want you to leave. Plan for different scenarios and work out a plan for each. For example, if they cry, do you stay and comfort them and leave when they are happy or do you leave while they are crying and the staff can comfort them. Work out what would work for you and what you are comfortable doing.
Contact from the centre during the day You can always contact the centre during the day to see how your child is, or you can ask them to send you an email to check in. Whatever works best for you and the centre. This will reassure you that your child is fine, easing your nerves and making it easier to focus on your work. When my son started I would get photos emailed from time to time and it made me feel comfortable that I have chosen the right centre. If you haven’t yet chosen a child care centre here are some tips to get you started:
Plan ahead Even if you don’t know how much child care you will need for your child it is important to plan ahead and book a child care centre in advance. In some areas there are very long waiting lists to it is sensible to put your child’s name down as early as possible. There are a variety of different options for the care of your child when you return to work. There is family daycare, long daycare, community daycare and preschools and kindergartens.
select based on your needs.
Determine the amount of Government assistance you will receive The level of assistance you will receive from Centrelink varies depending on your personal financial situation. It pays to organise this early so you know what you are eligible for. This will assist you in planning your return to work budget and determine how many days you want to return to work.
Talk to other mums If you have questions, thoughts or concerns talk to other mums about their childcare choices. Work out what you want from a centre. If you know what you are looking for it will make it easier for you to choose a centre that you are comfortable with. Just remember that it is transition for you, your partner and your child. Take one day at a time – there will be good days and bad and as all parents know, children go through phases.
Each option provides varying hours of care and varied costs per day. Planning ahead allows you to select the type of care that you feel most comfortable with and allows you to visit centres in your area and
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What are essential oils and how can you use them? I was introduced to the doTERRA essential oils a few months ago and have been learning more and more about them since then. Although very sceptic initially about the benefits to people that I had been seeing on social media, I was very happy to try them myself to see how they could help me with my mind, body, health and home. I am constantly learning and nowhere near an expert but have been amazed at the benefits that I have seen from using the oils.
Essential oils have long been used for health care practices, food preparation and as beauty treatments. Essential oils can be used to support the body on a physical and emotional level and can be used to support our health. They can be used to support our immune system, respiratory health, and digestive health. They also help with managing moods, help us to focus or rest and relaxed and eliminate toxic products in the home.
I started with the doTERRA introductory kit consisting of a 5ml bottle of Lavender, Lemon and Peppermint. When I opened the box I was surprised at the long list of uses for each oil. Over the past few months I have experimented and tried different ways to use these three oils.
The oils can be used for a wide range of physical and wellness applications, either one at a time or blended together.
After seeing the benefits of these three I ordered the home essentials kit, which includes the petal diffuser and 10 of the most loved essential oils in full size bottles.
Well, there are three ways you can use them:
There are so many uses for the 10 oils that I now have and I have loved experimenting.
So what are essential oils? The aromatic compounds found in seeds, bark, stems, roots, flowers and other parts of plants (those that have a scent) are used to create essential oils.
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So like, me you may be wondering how you can use essential oils?
Topical Application doTERRA oils can be applied directly onto the skin such as ears, templates, forehead, soles of the feet, back or abdomen. All you need to do is put a couple of drops on your hands and massage onto the area or use a roll on bottle. Some oils will need to be diluted in a carrier oil such as coconut oil. Essential oils are easily absorbed by the skin.
Ingestion
Lemon
Some of the doTERRA oils can be ingested so can be used in cooking or as a dietary supplement to support a variety of health conditions.
• Add a drop to your water bottle • Diffuse or inhale to elevate your mood • Add a drop to honey to soothe a dry throat or cough • Diffuse in a room to neutralise odours • Add to the washing machine to freshen it up or when you have forgotten you have washed a load of clothes and need to rewash
Aromatic Essential oils can be diffused or inhaled directly from the bottle. The effect will depend on the oils you choose to use. Some can be very stimulating, whereas others can be soothing and calming. My favourite oils and just some of their uses:
Lavender • Apply to the soles of the feet or on a pillow (or put on a cotton wool ball in your pillowcase) before sleeping. • Add to your children’s bath in the evening to relax them and help them sleep • Add to lotion for an aromatic hand massage • Use on bee stings or insect bites • Apply to wrists or inhale when travelling to ease motion sickness
OnGuard
Essential oils can also be used to make beauty products and cleaning products. I am excited to learn more about all the oils and how they can be used to help me take care of my own and my families health but I am already in love with doTERRA oils and the business. There are many other essential oil brands out there so if this is something you are interested in, do your research and if you want to ask any questions about purchasing oils, attending an essential oils class or the business opportunity feel free to email me, info@ workingmumscollective.com.au. * These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent disease.
• Supports healthy immune and respiratory function* • Diffuse for an energising and uplifting aroma • Add to water for an effective all-purpose surface cleaner.
Past Tense • Applied topically to my forehead and temples to ease a headache • Massage into shoulder, neck and back for a cooling sensation • Apply to wrists when travelling to help calm your emotions • Helps to ease stressful feelings
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Hayley Pearson
on career, Adelady, parenting and her thoughts on juggling work and babies!
Hayley Pearson, wife to Jimmy, mum to Austin and Alfie and one half of Adelady chats to founder of Working Mums Collective, Sarah about her career journey, how the idea for Adelady came to fruition and how she juggles her favourite job in the world, being a mum and following her dreams at the same time – something she says she is still trying to work out!
What did you want to be when you grew up? When I was a child I wanted to be a Hollywood actor. Just so I could marry Jonathan Taylor Thomas from Home Improvement. I was SAD! I knew I had to be working in the creative industry and putting my “story telling” skills to good use. So, I covered all bases -- I did my Year 10 work experience at a radio station (Mix 102.3), a TV station (Channel Ten) and a Graphic Design Firm. In year 12, I decided to study Journalism, knowing it could possibly lead to tv/radio opportunities – which it did.
So you were pretty clear from a young age what you wanted to do, so how did you get from here to your first job in radio? I had just finished my Journalism Degree at Uni SA and was also studying acting at SA Casting (still living the Hollywood acting dream) and the head of SA Casting called me and said, “Do you want to be a promo chick at Triple M and SAFM?” To which I said a big, “YES!” From there, I worked my way from promo chick to producer to being on-air. I then moved to HOT91 on the Sunshine coast, Queensland and hosted a Drive show for three years and then made the move to Melbourne Nova for another three years and finally scored my dream gig at SAFM in 2010.
What is the highlight from your time on radio? That’s tough, there are oh so many highlights! Raising 300k for Kick Start For Kids, an SA
based charity was pretty damn thrilling and also being able to help so many people was a big highlight. When I was at Nova, they flew me to LA to interview The Foo Fighters – DAVE GROHL!!! That was pretty amazing!
How did you find the juggle between your work on radio and time with your family? I found it hard. Radio takes over your brain. It never stops. You are ALWAYS thinking of topics and “what’s next” in the news. I found that when I was with my family I’d often be thinking of work. It was really difficult to switch off. But I also put that down to how I am – I put 150 percent of myself into everything I do. In saying that, I made it work. I went back to work 6 weeks after Austin was born; I had no choice so I just rolled with the punches and sucked it up.
I’ve read that you achieved your dream in 2010 of hosting the SAFM breakfast show, how difficult was it to make the decision to leave the breakfast show before having your second child? Mid last year, I was in a very different place – I was pregnant, anxious, stressed and just losing my mind at the thought of having to go back to work again 6 or 7 weeks after giving birth to my second child. I wrote down a list of pros and cons with my husband and the only pro on the SAFM list was money. In hindsight, they would have changed the show anyway so it was great timing. I still love radio, but I was desperate for a big break – and to not set my alarm at 4am every day! It’s been an exciting year!
So now you and Lauren De Cesare run Adelady (a website to inspire women and highlight the best of working mums
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Adelaide. It’s a place free of gossip and negativity. It’s full of fun, style, food, fashion, events and event a little mummy inspiration). Tell us, what was the driving force behind the creation of Adelady? How did it come to fruition? Lauren and I worked together at SAFM; she was my producer and we always had a great working relationship and friendship. I’d been thinking for a while that I wanted to use my skills – creating content, writing and story telling to a good use. We wanted to steer away from negativity, news and gossip and focus on all the great things about Adelaide. We were having lunch at Nature’s Providore in January 2015 (a year ago) and the idea for Adelady was born.
Aside from running Adelady, and being the face of the ‘metro whip around’ on The Project on Friday nights, what other work do you have on the go? I’m still doing bits and pieces on TV and hosting lots of events around SA. There are some exciting thing happening in 2016 but I cant reveal these yet!
What do your kids think you do for work? My eldest, Austin thinks it’s normal for Mummy to be on the TV or hear Mummy on the radio. He thinks that’s what all mums do. Whenever he sees a pineapple he says, “Look Mummy, it’s Adelady”.
How do you juggle your work with caring for your children and having time with your husband? Like all working mums it’s tough but we make it work. I’m super disciplined. I work non-stop when I don’t have the kids or when they are asleep. When they are awake I make sure I focus just on them. Jimmy, my husband understands, he’s worked in radio before too so he gets how full on working in the media is. He thinks I’m a much better wife now that I don’t do breakfast radio anymore!
What do you do to de-stress? I talk to my parents, Jimmy and friends. I am so open (probably too open) but I always have to get things off my chest. When I first had Alfie, I started to feel anxious again so I went and spent $280 at an art shop and spent my days painting! Being creative and writing really helps me to de-stress.
What is your favourite family activity? Our favourite family activity is going for Saturday walks just the four of us. No phones,
no TV, just us and we chat and have fun… and drink lots of coffee
Do you think mums can successfully combine a career and motherhood?
What do you and your hubby do for date night?
I think mums in general are amazing. Everyone is different. I know I’m not suited to not work.
Date night? What’s that? Haha!
For my sanity I need to work my brain and be creative as well as being a mum and a wife and a friend. I want to be able to prove that you can do it all!
When we get the chance, which to be honest is very rare, we go out for dinner and to a movie – it’s nice just being able to sit and chill out without kids crawling all over you and wanting every piece of you.
Can you share the best piece of parenting advice you have been given? Don’t care what anyone else thinks. Just do what YOU think is right. So often mums judge other mums and it REALLY annoys me. We should all be there, supporting each other. Every child is different so what works for one, may not work for another. I personally, have never been super strict with a nap times. I feel that it restricts you too much. You should still be able to have a life as well as a baby. I take Alfie with me most places and he just adapts.
If you could go back in time is there anything you would do differently as a parent? I would have slowed things down with Austin. With a first child you just can’t wait for the next stage – when will he walk, talk etc. He is 4 and grew up WAY too quickly. Alfie is still such a baby. I’m enjoying every moment (Apart from those moments when he’s screaming his head off teething).
How do your differ as a parent compared to your parents? I think I’m pretty similar. My Mum and Dad are so loving are affectionate and I hope I’m going to be as good as they are for my kids.
It’s bloody hard some days, but I think I’m a much stronger person now than I was before having my babies.
Who inspires you? Chrissie Swan - She’s one of my dear friends. We used to work together on the Sunny Coast in regional radio and then lived next door to each other in Melbourne, again working at the same radio station together. She loves her career BUT loves her kids and family so much more. She makes me feel normal. We’ve had many a bitch session about our radio jobs.
What is the best parenting book you have read? I have never read one. If I have a question, I ask mum. What is the number one piece of advice would you give other working mums or mums who are pregnant or have just had a baby and contemplating the return to work? You will feel guilty no matter what you do so just do what makes you the happiest. Create the perfect balance for you.
Finally, what is next for you? My focus is Adelady. Lauren and I have BIG BIG plans. It’s very exciting. Stay tuned.
Go to www.adelady.com.au to find out more.
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Story of a 36 week Pregnant Working Mum This pregnancy is so different to last time… Being a teacher, your due date and school holidays can affect your decision of when to begin taking maternity leave. When I was pregnant with my daughter back in 2012, I was only 28 weeks when I finished at the end of the school year, and she was born early March. This time around, I finished work at 36 weeks, with my baby being due before the end of 2015. So different. Last time during my long, luxurious maternity leave I went swimming all the time, watched every single episode of Greys Anatomy, coffee dates with friends and could pop to the shops to buy baby things whenever I liked! A friend said to me “you’ll never get this time again” meaning the time between finishing work and having your first child. A time when your days are truly your own. Luckily for me, I only work part time, two days a week. I don’t think I could have made it to the end of the school year if I was working full time. Every job is different. An expectant mother may be able to work for longer at an office/ 35 working mums
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desk job compared to a hairdresser who is on her feet all day. Teaching is also a physical job, especially the younger the children are. I was constantly circulating around the room, doing yard duty, walks up and back to and from the staff room, lesson preparation, classroom cleaning/tidying … I could go on and on with the daily tasks of my job. Not to mention that my day is not 9am – 3pm like many people assume. It starts at 6:30am when Miss M wakes up, and ends at about 8pm when she goes to sleep. Non-stop! Sometimes I feel I’ve been through the wars dealing with getting dressed tantrums before my day of work has even started. Miss M can be quite clingy to me at times, and as I’ve grown larger and my lap size has decreased, it’s been hard for us to find comfortable cuddle positions… I am also trying to avoid lifting her, getting her into a trolley
is probably the only unavoidable time. The collection of toys and small objects all over the floor are impossible to pick up. I remember my house being so tidy last time I was 36 weeks pregnant! (Enter ‘the claw’ – the best pregnancy life hack ever!) But enough with the winging… What am I grateful for? Here and now. • For being given the gift of a 2nd child and adding to our family. • For a relatively smooth pregnancy with no serious issues or morning sickness. • For having an accommodating employer who welcomed me back part time. • For a daughter who is toilet trained, in a big girl bed and dummy free ready to be a big sister. • For a supportive family who has and will continue to help support us when baby arrives and take care of Miss M. • For a husband who will have one month off while we adjust to becoming a family of four. • That I got to enjoy two days to myself while Miss M has her last two days of Child Care.
Pregnancy is a journey. Motherhood is a journey. For most of us, we need to fit our careers into our ever changing lives as parents. No one said it was going to be easy. We just need to take it one day at a time, one tantrum at a time, one obstetrician appointment at a time, one staff meeting at a time and keep looking ahead to the amazing prize at the end!
Written by Lauren Hunt Lauren is a mother, teacher and blogger. Her blog Teacher Types is a place where teachers and parents of young children can be inpired. Find her at www.teachertypes.com
“Since this article was written, Lauren has welcomed a beautiful baby boy and is adjusting to life as a mother of two. She’s looking forward to taking another year of maternity leave and hopes to return to part time work in 2017”.
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Wife of a Miner with Minors It’s 9.30pm, and my two children are finally asleep. Tonight’s evening routine started at 7.15pm – it’s now 10.15pm. This is a typical day in my life for six months of the year. I have been awake since 5.45am and am exhausted but not finished for the day. Only five more days until Husband is home. Not that I’m counting. Welcome to my world, the wife of a miner, with minors. I’m Sarah, a professional, working 4 days a week and renovating a late 19th Century house. I am also managing a household, juggling two children and a bulldog with a penchant for eating the garden hose. I have been a ‘FIFO wife’ for the best part of twelve years. My husband started working away in the mid 2000’s, firstly on the rail lines, then in the mines where he has been for 8 consecutive years. His first roster was 21 days on, 10 days off. Today he works 7 days on, 7 days off. It’s the holy grail of rosters. The industry calls it the family-friendly roster. However, the reality of being a sole parent for 50% of the time does have its downside. I have no social life, I can’t play sport and I cannot stay back in the office late to meet unplanned deadlines. Some weeks go quickly, others drag on. Every day, you wake up and do the best job you can. You learn to multitask, juggle and survive on less than 6 hours of sleep a night. If one of the children are restless or wake in the night your sleep could be less, but you still have to get up in the morning, put on the suit and go to work. For three years we lived in Central Queensland in a mining town. 70% of people worked in the mines, so I wasn’t alone in the sole parent 37 working mums
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department. I was however alone in the professional, working mum department. Inevitably I was faced with the usual conundrum most working women face. Do I persist in my career or do I take a step back – a moment to spend time with the children and a chance to become more involved in their lives. At first I chose work. I was head strong and in a management position with unprecedented exposure to high level projects. I was in my element. I loved my job; the rush, the power and the satisfaction of accomplishment kept me motivated. Most of my projects involved large scale developments, mining projects and high end negotiations with overseas investors. I thrived on the pace, but I was exhausted, both physically and mentally. Working full time as a sole parent, with no support from family or friends (It was always awkward relying on the other ‘wives’ because they were in the same situation as me) started to take its toll. I worked full time in the office until our daughter was born and then spent time between the office and working from home. Ultimately, I was still working beyond a full time load, in part-time hours. When my husband was transferred back to the City, we agreed that I should take a break from such a highly stressful and demanding job. At first I was reluctant to apply for jobs, but after several weeks the excitement of returning ‘home’ made me realise that I could work part-time and maintain a relatively senior role. I wrote a list of ‘wants that I felt were necessary in order for me to shift to part-time work. Workplace flexibility and teh ability to work from home were fundamental. After a few weeks I was successful in gaining a senior position, in an organisation who pride themselves on flexibility – for three days a week. In the City, I am the only person I know with a FIFO husband. I am repeatedly asked how I
do it. How do I cope? Do I get lonely? (nope, never). How do I keep my head above water so to speak? How do I maintain a professional role, while being Mum and Dad? How do I get the kids out the door at 7.20am every morning? In reality I don’t, not all of the time. I also have a great support network consisting of both family and friends. On the surface I look together, but behind the scenes I am a flurry of short cropped blonde hair and a shrill voice trying to maintain a level of sanity for all of us. My husband takes over the child duties when he is home and he cooks dinner every night except on the weekend. We don’t get much ‘alone time’. In fact, it’s been over a year since we have been out together. While husband is home I put in a little extra effort in the office and to catch up with girlfriends. Some people think our lifestyle is strange, but to us it works.
your personal and professional relationships. You have to learn to give and take make a compromises. For us, that was me. My workplace is also very supportive and I am so grateful that I have such a great and understanding team.
I am not going to sugar coat it. It’s tough. It’s a lifestyle that will chew you up and spit you out (and not necessarily whole) if you are not careful. It challenges every aspect of
Sarah is a Strategic Planner, with a love of chocolate. She has two children Miss 3 and Master 6 with a Husband working on a FIFO Roster.
I have been part-time for two years now and occasionally work additional hours. Do I agree with my decision? No, not all of the time. In my eyes I made a huge sacrifice in giving up my career. Was it worth it? Yes, absolutely. In the next six months I want to start applying for more senior positions. I know it is going to be tough to climb the corporate ladder again, but I am up for a new challenge.
Written by: Sarah Elding
Are you interested in learning how you can incorporate the use of doTERRA essential oils in your daily life? Contact info@workingmumscollective. com.au to find out more or to register for an online class.
The who, what, when, where, why and how in finding the right career for you
Just recently I was chatting to a friend about how she managed returning to work and that lovely thing we call ‘work life balance’ and a few words she said stuck with me, ‘I am a better mum because of returning to work’. WOW I thought. How great. Good on you! I had never had anyone put it to me in that way before and how she felt that returning to work, for her, was having a positive impact on her daughter’s life. She now values their time together so much more. Inspiring. And got me thinking, if going back to work is what you need to do for whatever reason (whether we want to or not), it shouldn’t be ‘hard work’ and we should not put so much pressure on ourselves to be either the inspiring mum or the career woman, when we can be both. I feel very grateful to have a great support network and a bunch of mothers who have experience in returning to work and the challenges they face which has given me the opportunity to chat to and soak up all their past experiences and mold them into what I feel will be best for me. For the average person, you’ll have around 12 to 15 jobs in your lifetime. Crazy statistic when you consider how many times that means you will go through the (dreaded) application process, especially getting that resume up to scratch and sitting through those grilling interviews. But, rest assured, these numbers don’t necessarily mean that you are going to have to reassess your career and be in and out of roles every 2 to 3 years. It just shows the frequency and more so the urge for people to find their ‘dream’ job, to build on their career and not settle for the ‘this will do’ role. People are more focused on finding the right role for
them and will chop and change until they find something that suits them and their lifestyle. I think this is fabulous and kudos to us to being diverse! For me personally, this has never felt more real. Not wanting to leave my son to return to work as I had a fear of missing out on those beautiful and crucial childhood moments and milestone. So – instead of dragging ourselves out of bed in the morning to get to that job that just pays the bills… lets make the most of our working careers and keep on looking until we have found that role that puts fire in our bellies.
Finding the right role for you doesn’t need to be a complicated process or a lengthy proposal – you can get key insights into what works for you in this simple strategy (and you can start straight away with these actionable steps). WHO, WHAT, WHEN, WHERE, WHY & HOW. 1. ASK YOURSELF: Who do you admire? Who are your role models? Who would you like to work for? Who are you stalking on LinkedIn? Action: connect with them, find out what their background is, how they got to their position, pick their brain for career inspiration and motivation – people love to talk about their journey and more often than not, are willing to share their resources and give a helping hand to people who are proactive. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no – go ahead and connect.
2. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE KNOWN FOR? What legacy do you want to leave behind? How do you want people to view you? What problem do you want to solve? working mums
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What is the bigger picture?
And finally,
Action: What you are good at? Write down all the tasks you currently do in a day and put a little star next to the tasks you enjoy and that you are good at (even if you don’t like doing it) you will be surprised at how many things you are actually good at and how you can apply them to your role.
6. HOW WILL THIS HAPPEN?
3. HOW DO YOU WORK BEST? When are you most productive? When are you willing to devote the best of you? When suits you are your family?
This is the strategy part. Firstly, pull all your notes and actions together to see where you stand and where your interests lie. What roles does it match? Do you see a pattern forming? Do you find yourself continuing to migrate to a similar style of work or role? Map it out. Type it up. Create a vision board. Next step, put those actions into place. START NOW! NOTE: This doesn’t happen overnight, but it will happen…
4. WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO WORK? From home? The city? The hills? Are you willing to travel? Where would be your dream location? Ideally (if you had the perfect role) where do you see yourself in 12 months’ time? What did you have to do to get there? Did you have to do extra study? Did you have to meet / network with some new people? Did you have to learn a new skill? Did you have to build your online presence? Did you have to understand a new market?
5. WHY? This is the BIG one. What is your “why”? Why are you doing what you do? What is your purpose? Why are you seeking action to change roles? ACTION: Declare this to the world (or just pop it on a post-it note and stick it on your desk). Keep reminding yourself why you are here and what you are working towards. How can you build on your “why” every day? Make your “why” your computer password. Stick it on your keyring. Put it on your fridge door. Be faced with it every day! Everything has a purpose to move you in the direction you want to be in – you just need to remind yourself of this and continue to be motivated and encourage yourself.
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Written by: Claire Colebeck Claire is a writer, blogger, mentor and career-advicegiving-educator. Claire does so by using her own experience, diving into the world of many fabulous careers. Claire helps guide you in your careers, giving advice, delving into what you are actually good at and applying that to your role, and most importantly giving fuel to your passion and desires. You can find Claire over at whiteblankpages.com.au
Five minutes with Sarah Thornton, founder of Yummy Mummy Group Training When did you start Yummy Mummy Group Training (YMGT)?
to find a place I could go to train, take my baby and get a good workout.
YMGT started in 2000.
So I asked around and it turned out there were a lot of mums who didn’t work out because they didn’t know where to go. So I started Yummy Mummys!
Had you always worked in the fitness industry? No I was a National Event Coordinator at the Cancer Council SA for 5 years before starting YMGT.
What was the reason behind starting YMGT? I had a life overhaul after getting married and lost 25kgs and realised how truly amazing living a healthy and active lifestyle made me feel. While losing this weight I studied Personal Training purely for my own knowledge to improve my training. Then I fell pregnant and no one could give me the correct advice on how to train while I was pregnant, so I did my own research with doctors, obstetricians and physios. After having my daughter I found it really hard
What is your vision for YMGT? My vision for YMGT is that every mum in Australia, no matter what age their children are, has a Yummy Mummys close to them where they are welcomed, have fun, get an excellent workout, get an hour of ‘me time’ knowing their kids are being well looked after and a place to connect with other mums.
How do you juggle working on your business with raising your two girls? This is a tough one. In the beginning I would do my admin work when the kids had their naps but I was lucky in having a crèche as they could come with me to each session. Now I rely on my very supportive husband and mum and also school and childcare. working mums
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I have realised the importance of balance and accepted that some days my kids get more of me and other days YMGT gets more of me.
Have you always been into fitness? I have always enjoyed sport but the older I got the more out of shape I got. It was only in my late 20s that I realised I was the one missing out on life by not being the best version of myself that I could be.
What is a day in the life of you like? Can you describe it for us? I like to train in the mornings so I get up at 5am and meet my running buddies for a good run to get my endorphins and metabolism cranking for the day. Come home and do the ‘breakfast and get everyone ready for the day’ routine. Then drop the kids off and get to a YMGT training session for a good workout. After training I tend to come home and do all my admin (home office), attend meetings or some days is kinder gym or ballet lessons before school pick and then I try and switch off and hang out with my family. 43 working mums
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What is your number one tip for working mums to try and fit fitness into their routine? Whether it be before or after work or in our lunchbreak schedule in exercise just like you would a meeting. Put it in your diary, commit to it and be consistent. If possible get a training buddy as it’s always more fun and easier when you work out with others.
What are your long term plans for YMGT? To have a YMGT accessible for every mum.
What is your favourite healthy meal and snack? I have lots! An apple with almond spread Carrot sticks with hommus Whipped frozen banana and cacao powder
What are some easy exercises that mums can do at home? I always think a circuit is great at home so you don’t get bored. Try this: • • • • • • • • • • • • •
30 seconds of each exercise. tricep dips on a chair push ups squat jumps mountain climbers plank burpees walking lunges supermans standing calf raises bicycle crunches reverse crunches leg lowers
Do 3 rounds.
Is it just stress? Or something more? There seems to be an unwritten rule that working mothers are supposed to be stressed and exhausted. Indeed if you took a straw poll of all the women reading this magazine, I’m willing to bet the vast majority of you fall into bed at the end of the day completely knackered, but still with a million thoughts running through your head. Stressed? Yes. Exhausted. You betcha! Unfortunately it’s rare to find a working mother who exudes nothing but a relaxed air about her at all times, one who sails through the combined demands of maintaining a career and caring for a family with ease and wonder. Though wouldn’t it be wonderful if this were the norm? But while stress and exhaustion may be epidemic in our society and are a health problem in their own right, they are also precursors to the much more concerning mental health conditions of depression and anxiety. As a collective, working mothers are well versed in ‘pushing through’, and making the required sacrifices to get everything done on time and under budget, both at home and in the workplace. But when it comes to our own health and wellbeing, we can easily push too far. If we allow ourselves to become overwhelmed by stress, guilt and worry, then we can find ourselves facing an even bigger battle that we are no longer able to push through. So when does exhaustion become depression? 45 working mums
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When does stress become anxiety?
There’s no definitive answer to this question because, as with many things, depression and anxiety occur on a continuum. We don’t simply wake up one morning to find we have clinical depression. It is generally something that builds up over a period of time. The onset can be slow and insidious. Much like analogy of the frog who doesn’t notice he is slowly being boiled alive until it’s too late, it can be difficult to recognise the slippery slope of anxiety and depression once you’re on it. Which is why it’s important to make self-reflection a regular practice, even at the busiest of times. Actually, especially at the busiest of times! Here’s five questions you can ask yourself to help you determine whether what you’re experiencing may be more than the garden variety stress and tiredness. 1) Is this stress and worry having implications on my functioning? Are you finding it hard to get out of bed on a regular basis? Do you always feel tired and are constantly running late? Are you making uncharacteristic mistakes at work? Are you frequently forgetting things? From a clinical perspective, one of the factors that delineates between stress and depression is how well a person is still able to function in their daily lives. Is stress is causing dysfunction, then it’s a definite problem.
2) Am I no longer enjoying the things I used to? Does the weekly RPM class you used to love just feel like a chore now? Does the thought of dinner out with your friends seem like a big hassle and you’d rather stay on the couch binge-watching Netflix? It’s a sad irony that depression often causes us to turn away from the very things that could help to make us feel better. Being unable to look forward to previously enjoyable activities is a common sign of depression. 3) When was the last time I laughed? Can you still see the funny side of things? Do your husband’s antics still give you the giggles, or are they more likely to make you snap at him for being childish or insensitive? Do you remember the last time you really laughed? You know, a big old belly laugh that you couldn’t control, while tears streamed down your cheeks. Life should be full of laughter – even in the tough times. If you can no longer find joy in daily situations, that can be a warning sign of depression. 4) Am I taking the blame? Are you being hypercritical of yourself – at home or at work? Are you blaming yourself for your children’s poor school grades, or perhaps shouldering the entire blame for a whole-team failure at work? Depression and guilt often go hand in hand, and each can exacerbate the other if left unchecked. 5) Am I sweating the small stuff? Do you fly into a rage when your kids can’t find their shoes? Perhaps you burst into tears the last time you found a parking ticket on your windscreen? Life is full of missteps and mishaps, but people with a high level of resilience are able to take these in their stride, acknowledging them for what they are. When we find ourselves responding excessively to life’s little irritations it can also be a sign of a deeper problem of anxiety or depression. Any of this sound familiar? Unfortunately stress has become such an expected part of modern society that we often forget just how damaging it can be, which is why we often let it go unchecked. But it’s important to understand the relationship between stress and depression and to take action as early as possible once we know a situation is becoming problematic. Asking for help can certainly be daunting and difficult, but early intervention gives you the best possible chance of speedy and positive outcomes. So if you find yourself answering yes to a few of the above questions, please take the time to seek support from a qualified health professional, such as your GP, a counsellor or other mental health clinician.
Could it be depression? For the past two weeks or more have you felt the following on a regular or frequent (daily) basis? • • • • • • • • •
Difficulty being able to laugh and see the funny side of things Decreased ability to look forward to enjoyable activities. Blaming yourself unnecessarily when things have gone wrong Feeling anxious or worried for without good reason Feeling like things are frequently “getting on top of you” Difficulty sleeping or sleeping excessively Frequently feeling sad or miserable quite often Frequent bouts of crying Having thoughts of harming myself of others **
If you have been experiencing several of these symptoms over the past two weeks or more please seek advice from your GP. ** If you answered yes to the final point, please seek immediate support. For further resources about depression or anxiety please visit the following websites: www.beyondblue.org.au http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/ www.gidgetfoundation.com.au www.panda.org.au If you require immediate support, please contact Lifeline on 131 114
Written by: Sarah Hausler Sarah is a Women’s Health Occupational Therapist, blogger, director of Bloom Wellbeing and mother of two spirited young girls. Through her clinic and blog, Sarah specialises in supporting women to adjust to the emotional and physical demands of pregnancy, the post-natal period and motherhood. Sarah provides individual and group programs from Adelaide, South Australia, as well as online mentoring for mothers from around the globe, via Skype. For more information on Sarah visit www.bloomwellbeing.com.au
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9 Loving Reminders for Working Mums
“THIS TOO SHALL PASS” The longest day, and the most sleep-deprived night will not last forever. I would never suggest that you wish your precious time away, however it always helps to remember that everything is temporary. In the toughest times this reminder will help you to hold tight, knowing that whatever it is that you are going through, will eventually pass.
“YOU ARE ENOUGH” It is so easy to slip into a state of constant comparison these days, with so many messages from the media every which way we turn! There is always something more you can be doing in the kitchen, in your wardrobe, in your office, in your beauty routine, in your exercise routine. If you find yourself always adding more to your list of things you want to change yet feeling like you are trapped in a never-ending cycle, stop, and remember .. You are enough, just as you are, in each and every moment.
“LIFE IS NOT A CONTEST” It is not about who has the biggest home, the nicest car, the best-behaved children, the most photogenic life. The most loving thing you can do for yourself and your family is to remember that only you and your family matters. Stop competing. At the end of the day, and at the end of your life, it is not about any of these things. It is about how well you loved, how well you let go of the things that didn’t matter, and how well you were loved.
“IT IS NOT ABOUT PERFECTION” Embrace a little mess, the half finished projects and the un-ticked TO DO list. Be a little less demanding on yourself and focus on what really matters. It is not about being perfect, or looking perfect. Does it really matter if that basket of laundry gets folded next week? Why is it so important to you that every little thing you do reaches a state of perfection? Have a little think about this, have a look into the reasons from your past that may drive you towards perfectionism, and then start to let some of this go. It is seriously one of the most liberating things for working Mums!
“BE MORE KIND THAN YOU FEEL” The most important part of this one is that you turn it on yourself too! Some days things are chaotic, overwhelming and you can hardly find the energy to crack a smile. It is those times that you need this reminder most! Take a breath and allow
kindness and calm to enter your thoughts. If there is someone in particular you feel least inclined to share some kindness with, they are your target! Honestly, you will feel so much better if you choose kindness and grace over anger and tantrums.
“FOLLOW YOUR HEART” As a Mum, you are most likely bombarded with advice from well meaning family, friends and of course social media. It can be hard to work through it all and decide what is really best for you and your own family. Listen to your heart, and your intuition, which are really the same things anyway! You are the best Mother for your children, you know what is best in every moment. Stop, take a breathe and tune into your own knowing.
“BREATHE” Such a simple yet important reminder. How often do you stop to really breathe? There is a sacred space in your breath, a place where you can tap into your knowing mentioned above. It is in those quiet moments where you will find the peace you need to deal with loud little people, demanding big people, and everything else that life throws at you as a working Mum on a daily basis. Simply close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, now!
“LET IT GO” The art of forgiveness is truly magical. Letting go of anger, bitterness and deeply held hurt feelings will change your life. Let go of the small things, the petty arguments, the spite and anything yucky that is taking up precious space in your heart. Be sure to do this regularly, you may want to find a quiet space and take a few moments to write these things down as a way of really letting them go.
“YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL” Last, certainly not least of all these loving reminders .. You are beautiful. Beauty is not about losing weight, having the latest OOTD (outfit of the day for those non bloggers!), lots of make up and filters, a life and body styled to perfection. There is nothing wrong with these things, and we all find beauty in different places. You need to remember though that you are beautiful from the inside out. SHINE ON beautiful working Mammas xx
Written by: Lisa Humphries - The art of joy www.theartofjoy.org working mums
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TRAVELLING WITH KIDS
What to pack in the carry on bag? It pays to be prepared when travelling with kids and the most important bag of all is the carry on bag. You need to have items and activities planned that will keep your kids entertained in the airport and during the flight. It is worth spending some time thinking about the items that your children are happy to sit and do for long periods of time and work out a plan around that. All children are different and have different interests but this list may help give you some ideas when planning your next holiday. Before we went on our last family holiday to Bali I went out to The Reject Shop and Big W and bought some art packs and some other craft items, a large pencil case for each child, new colouring in books and textas. I bought new items because my kids are always more
excited to have new things. My daughter helped me choose some of the items at the shops so she was excited to get to use them on the plane. This is what went into our carry on bags: Colouring in books and pencils/crayons or textas Some new textas and colouring in books went down a treat with my kids. They love sitting at home and drawing and colouring so having some new books was great and certainly a hit! I even enjoyed colouring in one of them with my daughter! These were great to have in the hotel too for times when we just needed to sit back and relax. It kept them very quiet that’s for sure! Stickers and sticker books What kids doesn’t love stickers? My daughter loves sticking them on her hands and in her
colouring in books so this helped to pass some of the time on the plane. As well as sticking stickers on herself and everything in the hotel room! Blank paper Perfect for drawing their own pictures or sticking stickers on – or if you can – making origami or paper planes (as long as they don’t hit anyone!) Craft packs I bought some craft supplies to include in their packs. We didn’t use these much on the plane but did spend about half an hour making some pom pom owls which was a fun activity and passed some time. I put some pipe cleaners, stickers, eyes, pom poms and other bits and pieces together which they used in the hotel so it definitely came in handy.
DVD player, DVD’s and headphones We took this with us but didn’t use it – I thought my daughter might have liked to watch a movie but we were too busy colouring in! But if the colouring in didn’t pass the time, I’m sure she would have sat and watched Frozen on the DVD player. iPad and headphones The iPad was a lifesaver this trip! My son loved playing games. He is realitively new to using an iPad so he loved trying out new games and watched a movie on it during the flight. Neck pillow These are a bit of a novelty for our kids but it was great to rest against the window for my daughter’s head when she finally fell asleep (we flew in the evening so thought they would both crash around their normal bed time but I think they were both too excited!). Special toys/comforters/teddies A must. My daughter loves her blankie and we don’t go anywhere without it. So both kids had a favourite toy with them in the carry on bag. Snacks We didn’t do so well with this one. We packed some museli bars, chocolate bars and some water but could have done better. We bought food on the plane but there wasn’t much to choose from for our kids – I will remember this for next time. I thought they would fall asleep and wouldn’t need to eat but didn’t think about what to do if they didn’t sleep – definitely a note for next time. Nappies and wipes You can ever have too many wipes – they usually go everywhere with me. Our daughter has started toilet training but still in pull-ups so we had to make sure we had enough for the airport, the plane and the trip to the hotel.
Books Stories are great – I read a few books with my daughter (mainly just Frozen over and over again!) and then she spent some time flicking through the pages herself and putting together a story from the pictures.
Our kids were aged 2 and 5 when we went on this trip. The packs we made up were a success and perfect for this trip. Written by: Sarah Poppy, founder of Working Mums Collective
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Buckwheat Pizza Serves 1-2
Ingredients 1 cup buckwheat flour 3 tablespoons Arrowroot (Tapioca flour) 1â „4 cup olive oil 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar 1 teaspoon baking powder 1â „2 cup Italian herbs (I use either a mix of basil and oregano or Italian herb mix from the supermarkets) 1 cup water Method: Pre heat your oven on 200 degrees Celcius. Mix all ingredients together in a bowl. The mixture should resemble cake batter and should be fairly runny. Spread onto a lined pizza stone or a lined baking tray with a spoon or spatula. Place in your oven and cook for 1520 minutes or until the top is firm and golden. The longer you cook it the crispier it will turn out. Take out of the oven and add your favourite toppings (see below for my personal choice). Place back into the oven and cook for a further 10 minutes or until your pizza toppings are cooked through.
Recipe from Vanessa Vickery at Becomingness. Ness is a qualified nutritionist, a life & wellness coach in-training, and a mother of two gorgeous and extremely energetic toddlers. She has created Becomingness, a health and wellness website, to help women achieve their health and wellness goals by providing accurate, accessible and attractive products and services that promote motivation, empowerment, self-belief and happiness. Come say hello and follow Ness on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter & Pinterest.
Pumpkin Pesto Pasta Serves 4
For the Pesto 1/4 cup macadamias (cashews also work well) 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil 1 cup firmly packed basil leaves 1/2 cup grated parmesan cheese 1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar 3 cloves garlic, minced For the Pasta 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil 500g butternut pumpkin, cut into 1cm cubes 100g semi-dried tomatoes 400g pasta of your choice 100g feta For the Pesto Place the macadamias in a food processor or blender and pulse until roughly chopped. Remove and place aside. Place the remaining ingredients in a food processor or blender and process until smooth. Add nuts and process until just combined. Pour into a bowl and set aside.
For the Pasta Place pasta in a pot of boiling salted water and cook until al dente. Meanwhile, heat oil in a large pan on medium heat. Add pumpkin and sautÊ for 5 mins, stirring regularly. Cover and continue to cook for another 5 mins or until pumpkin has softened. Add tomatoes and pasta to pan and pour over pesto and toss until pasta is evenly coated. Crumble over feta and serve. Recipe from Chelsea Brown at The Nutrition Mama. Chelsea is a university qualified nutritionist who is passionate about family health and nutrition. She blogs over at The Nutrition Mama where her mission is to share her knowledge of nutrition and her passion for cooking with women all over the world. She focuses on developing healthy, budget-friendly recipes that are suitable for the whole family in an effort to show other mamas that preparing healthy food for their families isn’t as difficult as they may think.
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Ingredients Base
make sure it is evenly spread. Place back into the freezer and let it set completely (around 1 hour).
12 medjool dates, pits removed ½ cup macadamias 1 cup dessicated coconut
Please note that the top layer does not need to be made until the middle layer has set completely.
Middle layer
Remove from the tin, slice straight away and store in an airtight container in the freezer.
12 medjool dates, pitted 1 cup raw macadamias 1/2 cup coconut oil, melted 1/2 cup pure maple syrup 2 tablespoons tahini (either hulled or unhulled) 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 1/3 cup water Top Layer 1/3 cup coconut oil 2 tablespoons pure maple syrup (honey would also work) 1/3 cup raw cacao powder Method To make the base, add the base ingredients to a high speed blender or food processor and blend until it resembles fine crumbs and sticks together when pressed. Spoon mixture into a lined slice tin (20x20cm) and press down with the back of a spoon. Place in the freezer.
Serves 20 If you are a fan of this recipe and are looking for healthier desserts and sweet treats then Ness’ book BecomingSweet is for you. Inside BecomingSweet: • 80 beautiful pages filled with over 50 healthy and amazing recipes. • Sections include Raw, Baked Treats, Chocolate, Basic Elements, Simple Treats and Wow Factor Desserts. • Gorgeous photography and supporting information throughout the book. • All recipes are created using real food ingredients: nothing artificial, no preservatives, and no additives. • All recipes are gluten, dairy free and refined sugar free. With a great selection of recipes that are tree nut, peanut and egg free. • Most recipes are paleo and vegan inspired.
To make the caramel layer, add the caramel layer ingredients to a high speed blender and process until completely combined and smooth. You may need to add a little more water to help blend the ingredients. Spoon the mixture on top of the base, smooth with the back of a spoon and return it to the freezer to set. To make the chocolate layer, melt the coconut oil in saucepan on low heat. Once melted, remove from heat and add the maple syrup (or honey), whisking briskly until well combined. Then add the cacao powder, stirring until well mixed through. Pour the chocolate on top of the caramel filling and working mums
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Toddler Baked Beans with hidden veggies Makes 6 toddler size serves
Ingredients 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 teaspoon garlic, minced 1 carrot, grated 1/2 medium zucchini, grated 1/2 cup of sweet potato, grated 1/4 cup kale (1/2 leaf), finely chopped (can substitute with spinach) 1 tablespoon pure maple syrup 2 x 400g tins of cannellini beans, drained and rinsed 1 x 400g tin diced tomatoes Instructions: Place a saucepan over medium heat and add olive oil and garlic. Saute for 1 minute and add carrot, zucchini, sweet potato and kale. Cook for 5 minutes, until vegetables begin to soften. Add tomatoes and bring to a gentle simmer for a further 5 minutes. Remove from heat temporarily and blend sauce with a stick blender or transfer into a blender and process until smooth. Return sauce back to heat and add beans and maple syrup. Stir and gently simmer for 5 minutes, until beans are warmed through. Remove from heat and portion out, serve with toast fingers or sweet potato dippers. Freeze the remaining portions.
Recipe from Chelsea Brown at The Nutrition Mama. Chelsea is a university qualified nutritionist who is passionate about family health and nutrition. She blogs over at The Nutrition Mama where her mission is to share her knowledge of nutrition and her passion for cooking with women all over the world. She focuses on developing healthy, budget-friendly recipes that are suitable for the whole family in an effort to show other mamas that preparing healthy food for their families isn’t as difficult as they may think. 55 working mums
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Frozen Popsicles These are a fabulous way to get a bunch of fruit and veggies into your kids and a wonderful summer treat anytime of the day. The perfect snack or treat this summer.
Mango and coconut
Puree a whole fresh mango and half fill popsicle moulds. Blend some coconut milk, banana, chia seeds and fill moulds to top. Freeze + enjoy.
Strawberry and vanilla
Chop 6 fresh strawberries and place in popsicle moulds. Blend a cup of fresh strawberries with a cup of almond milk (or milk of choice) and Tbsp of pure vanilla extract and two bananas. Blend and pour into moulds. Freeze + enjoy.
Green Goodness
Slice 4 green kiwi fruits and place a few slices at bottom of each mould. Blend the remaining kiwi with a handful of baby spinach, cup of fresh pineapple pieces, 1/2 avocado and a squeeze of lime juice. Fill popsicle moulds. Freeze + enjoy. Recipe’s from Elisha Wildblood.
Chocolate Crunch
Blend 2 ripe bananas with 1 cup of almond milk (or milk of choice) and 2 tablespoons of raw cacao powder. Pour into popsicle moulds. Freeze. Once frozen completely make a dipping sauce of 1/3 coconut oil, teaspoon of raw cacao powder and teaspoon of brown rice syrup. Dip the frozen popsicles repeatedly in sauce or drizzle over so it builds up in a thick layer and then while last layer of chocolate is still wet, sprinkle on some sunflower seeds or puffed quinoa/brown rice.
Elisha is a Mother of 3, a Teacher, a Certified Holistic Health + Nutrition Coach for families, CTC Therapist ( trained in NLP, EFT, Level 2 Reiki and Meditation) and the passionate force behind NOURISH~NURTURE~SHINE For these and more go to www. elishawildblood.com to get your copy of ‘Nourish Your Babes, Filled with nourishing recipes, ideas and tips for breakfast, lunch + dinner.
How to master dinner time after a day from hell Does this sound familiar?
in your city.
It’s 5:30pm, you’ve had the day from hell.
You finally arrive at the daycare center and get the run down on what the kids have been up to for the day while you quickly sign them out. You’re almost out the door before being called back to sign the accident report informing you of the†grazed knee incident.
Your boss was in a funk, the deadline for the project you are working on just got changed to URGENT, the computer system crashed and the meeting with your colleagues was testing. You quickly shutdown your computer, grab your handbag and keys and rush out of the office because if you leave any second later you’ll be the last parent at pick up and the daycare centre will have started charging you overtime rates. You jump in the car and start navigating the traffic with what seems like every other person 57 working mums
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You tackle the kids into the car, pleading with them to stop fighting against the seat belt. Finally you’re back on the road, negotiating the traffic which seems to have got even worse in the time it’s taken you to win the seat belt battle. As much as you’d love to be able to hear the news report on the radio, you spend the commute home singing nursery rhymes,
attempting to answer all the “Why?” questions and intervening to avoid an all out brawl after your youngest just pinched her sister. All the while, passing drink bottles back and forth… and teddies… and dry biscuits. Oh and driving! Eventually you arrive home and pile the kids through the front door hurrying to dump the mountain of bags and clothes and drink bottles and soft toys on the bench.
And all you have to do is throw together a simple coleslaw salad? Slow cookers are a working families best friend. Not only are they cheap to buy (check out your Op Shops or Gumtree for a second hand one), they allow you to save money at the butcher because you can make any cheap cut of meat taste divine! Think slow cooked beef casserol, pulled chicken or pork, lamb shanks, vegetable stews… the possibilities are endless!
They’re tired and hungry. So are you. And then it dawns on you… What are you going to cook for DINNER!!!?? All you want to do is order in pizza but you know you really should provide something a bit more nutritious for you and your children. Take a deep breath... Help is here.
Use these 6 lifesaving tips to get you through… 1. Do Weekly Meal Plans I know you’ve probably read this/thought this/ been told this a million times before. But.. On nights like that, having done a meal plan can seriously be the difference between you calling the pizza guy or whipping up a quick healthy meal you actually want your children to eat!
2. Invest in a Slow Cooker (and use it!) On a day like that, wouldn’t it be lovely to walk through the front door with the smell of pulled pork wafting through the house?
3. Use Your Freezer It’s a great idea to cook a†double†batch of pasta sauce, casserole, quiche, lasagna, taco filling, pulled pork/chicken to freeze so that on busy nights, all you need to do is defrost and heat it up! So maybe you forgot to meal plan this week and the fridge is looking a little empty. Hopefully you’ve got some of that spag bol sauce you remembered to put in the freezer on Monday night? No? Peas and any other vegetable you like are also great to have frozen. These are perfect to add into a quick stir fry, fried rice or noodle soup. Actually my girls LOVE eating peas straight from the freezer! Frozen spinach is also a winner. working mums
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RECIPE IDEA: Simply defrost and heat up some frozen spinach. Stir through some ricotta or parmesan or feta or cheddar (surely you have some cheese in your fridge?). Add some herbs, balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Top on toast, pasta, mushrooms, eggs… and hey presto! You have yourself a meal.
4. Stock Up On These Pantry Essentials Ok, so maybe you didn’t get around to meal planning this week and you’ve eaten the last of your frozen prepared meals. You find yourself staring into the abyss of your pantry still contemplating calling that Pizza guy. Hopefully there are some of these staples staring back at you: • canned tomatoes and/or pasatta sauce • canned tuna (or any other fish) • canned legumes or red lentils • quinoa, brown rice or basmati rice • balsamic vinegar • coconut milk/cream • an array of spices • pasta or noodles • Soy sauce or Tamari or miso paste
RECIPE IDEA:
Not enough time to cook the pasta? Serve it on toast or with quinoa or stir some cannellini beans through. Or Red lentils take no time at all to soften.
ANOTHER RECIPE IDEA: Add a cup of red lentils with a can of tomatoes, can of coconut milk or cream, 1.5 cups of water or stock, some spices like ginger, cumin, cardamon, cinnamon, coriander and mustard seeds. Within half an hour you have yourself a delicious dhal (add in†any veggies you have lying around just a few minutes before it is finished cooking)! Still not sold…
SUPER SIMPLE RECIPE IDEA: Cook your favourite noodles and add in any veggies you have fresh or frozen with a splash of soy sauce/tamari/miso. Add egg or tuna. Done!
5. Keep Your Egg Collection Well Stocked Eggs are so super versatile. They’re ready in minutes.
It’s amazing what you can do with a can of tomatoes, tuna, and some frozen spinach (everyone has spinach in their freezer right?). Just add some herbs like basil or oregano (dried or fresh) 59 working mums
Add a splash of balsamic vinegar, season with salt and pepper and you’ve just made a pasta sauce.
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They are the perfect option on a night like this. Poached, fried, boiled, scrambled, omelette, fritatta, baked… Serve on toast with avocado, spinach, tomato and cheese.
Dinner done in under 10 minutes!
6. Batch Cook Grains and Legumes Cook up a big quantity of your families favourite grains and legumes so they are ready and accessible to have with eggs or some quick poached or steamed fish or chicken and serve with any veggies you can find. If you store them in an air tight container, they will last around 3 days in the fridge.
So there you go… Save or print these tips so the next time you find yourself at the end of a horrible day, struggling to find something quick and easy to feed
your family, you’ll be able to pull through without having to call the pizza guy!
Written by Brigid Creasey – Wholesome Mum Brigid is extremely passionate about spreading health and wholefood nutrition information as far as she can, particularly for all the busy mums who are confused and worried about how and what to feed their children. Sign up to her free email series where Brigid will show you how to enjoy wholesome, healthy food without feeling like you’ve spent the whole day in the kitchen.
They call me Mother Becoming a mother was the easy part. I fell in love with this nice bloke and we decided to have a baby. No problem! Not that falling pregnant was that straightforward but lucky for us it did happen and then hey presto, this little baby boy with huge brown eyes suddenly appeared in our house as if he’d been there all along, invisible and quietly waiting off to the side until someone came along with a fat crayon and coloured him in, rendering him real and vivid and squally.
There’s even a rumour my brain might be growing back. Yesterday I remembered the word for cake (important).
Fast forward six years and there are three of them now. Another brilliant boy and a steelyeyed girl closing in fast behind. I’ve carried, birthed and breastfed them all and now that the youngest is almost two, my perpetually puffed shut eyes are beginning to prise open.
Fear not.
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So when the dust settles and the children loosen their stranglehold just long enough for oxygen to reflood your brain, what then? Who the hell are you anyway? You catch sight of yourself in the mirror, which is startling. You bear the weary countenance of a shell-shocked war veteran, and someone much older than you remember. You squint continuously now, even in a dim room. You are slow to respond to basic commands, many you ignore completely. Some say the damage is permanent.
Reanimating from this state is no simple matter of course. But for those of you still battling it out on the frontline with newborns and toddlers, mad with fatigue, wearing elasticised pants, living off fish fingers flung from the
high chair and feverishly googling early-onset Alzheimers at three am, this message is for you.
something we stepped out of in haste and left in a heap on the floor as we threw ourselves at this all-consuming thing called motherhood.
It won’t happen overnight. It may not even happen for a few years (in fact let’s face it, depending on how many children you have, it could be quite a few years). But it will happen.
At some point you will need to come back to her, that innate sense of who you are. You will need to make the effort to find her again, to dig around in the back of your now cluttered and jammed mental and emotional cupboard, take her out and shake her off.
Your brain will grow back. You might be missing some words now but don’t worry, you will make up new ones. The ideas will return. And let me tell you, they will be good. More than good. They might actually be the best goddamn things you’ve ever thought of, not just because your standards have dropped but because they have been percolating away in the backroom, aging like a fine wine, waiting patiently for their moment in the spotlight. They’ve had time to gestate (sorry couldn’t help myself). You might have been good before. Hell you might even have been very good. But you’ve never been as good as you will be post motherhood. Your creativity will fire back up, roaring like a fiery… um fire thing. And your will and drive to succeed will only be stronger and more powerful than ever before. Because now you have an extra incentive. Now there is this in-built little audience watching and modelling from the front row (no pressure of course), their eyes wide with love-struck awe and admiration, as you, Mum of Total Awesomeness, knock that shit right outta the park. This is not just about surviving those early pummelling years of parenthood though, which as far as I can tell only get replaced by middle and later pummelling years of parenthood. As a weathered old Texan rocking on a front porch once told my mother, “You never stop parentin’!”. This is more about what happens when we become mothers, that sense of self that slips away, or gets folded up and put aside, or like
Don’t lose her. That wonderful sassy badass who has carried you through your life right to this point. She’s still there, feet up on the couch, drink in hand, eyebrow arched, just waiting for the deluge to pass. Note: I’m not there yet. This is not exactly some golden-hued beam of enlightenment from up high. I’m still changing nappies, hunting for lost dummies and hovering helicopter style as my youngest insists on teetering inches from death on playground equipment. I’m still perpetually tired, frequently cranky and often unwashed (though sadly mostly through choice these days) but after three kids in quick succession, I can finally sense a shift. Something is ticking back to life. I am writing. I am thinking. I am planning. The Great Post Motherhood Identity Recalibration has begun.
Written by Emma Fletcher Emma Fletcher is a freelance writer who craves quiet and solitude and then had three children entirely on purpose. So now she writes in the wee hours. You can find her at thistruenorth.com where she writes about creativity, writing and motherhood.
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Body loving babes
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How often do we place our self-worth on the size label that’s sewn inside our clothing? Too bloody often! And just while I’m writing that sentence my mind is stuck on ‘inside our clothing”…these labels are hidden and not even on show yet we still let that number mess with our self-worth and self-esteem. Yet women all over the world battle with their size and shape every single day. Oh, I’ve been there, was stuck there, but these days I’m completely in love with my body. It doesn’t mean I think I’m perfect, but instead it means I’m content. Sure it took a cancer diagnosis to get there but there’s nothing like the fear of losing your body and life to snap a girl back to reality. This body endured chemotherapy, radiotherapy and nine surgeries. This body still deals with ongoing side effects daily but it’s doing it. My body is moving, breathing and getting me through life. We all have it inside, confidence needs to be learned and needs nurturing but living life with confidence and belief in ourselves enhances our lives. Having had the wakeup call and knowing how quickly life can change I don’t want to waste one single day. I want my days to be meaningful, memorable and free from stress and angst. Loving my body is an inside job, only I can do it and in a world where we sometimes can’t control everything, loving my body is one thing I can control. Showing your body gratitude is vital to falling in love with your body, you see ‘your body hears what the mind thinks’. It really does. Think kind and nurturing thoughts and your body will reward you. After I fell in love with my body I had gratitude in bucket loads…enough to share. So share I do. Even though I’m a daily chatterbox (on my blog and its connected social media), talking about
fashion, styling, cancer, life and body image, what I really noticed was the ‘lurkers’. These were the ladies that linked in to the body image messages and sent me private messages of thanks and heartbreak. Women all over the world paralysed by fear and hate….for their own bodies. Over several months of sharing on my Styling Curvy Facebook page I saw a need for these ladies to have a private space to vent, celebrate and share. Poor body image meant these ladies had suffered a dent to their selfconfidence and most didn’t feel comfortable sharing intimate, personal thoughts and details on an open forum…so I created a closed group for them. “Body loving Babes’ was meant to be a six week share and care forum, but when I saw how much the ladies needed it I decided to keep it going. I kick started the group but the ladies in the community keep it going. They share their wins and losses, daily thoughts or fears and they support each other. It’s a positive space where over time women flourish. A private forum gives them the safety net to do that. Watching women bloom is the best. The silent ones suddenly become brave and share thoughts and photos and before you know it they’ve morphed into confident sassy women. Suddenly they find their voice and I see them sharing on my public page “Styling Curvy’, that’s when I really know there’s been permanent change and it makes my heart smile.
Here’s 5 tips that will take you closer to loving your body… 1. Change your internal dialogue.
Speak and think kind words about your body. Focus on what it ‘can’ do instead of the perceived flaws.
2. Take more photos of yourself.
Get in the frame and be present in those memories. When I take style pics of my clients and they see how they ‘actually’ look suddenly their stance changes. The woman looking back isn’t the grotesque working mums
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creature they imagine in their minds and all of a sudden they stand straighter and taller…with confidence. I suggest you join in online style challenges where you take daily style photos, this will not only improve your confidence and your style but the community spirit and friendships made are priceless.
3. Get some style help. Over time our
bodies change and so do the stages of our lives, sometimes women lose their style mojo and need a little help, seek that help. If you can’t afford a personal stylist (we’re not that expensive) then find an online stylist that you connect with. Look for a community where you will learn styling tips and tricks and find information on where to purchase products all while feeling supported and heard.
I’ll give you a style forecast for the upcoming months. You’ll see more feminine lace and pink, you’ll also see patchwork and that 70’s bohemian vibe and you’ll see pants that are a more relaxed fit with paper bag waists and drop crutch pants are still here to stay. For those that love the sporty relaxed look (like me) there will be a return of the polo collar, even in dresses. As you can see there something for everyone, that’s the thing about fashion, there always is. The trick is fine tuning your personal style and adding a sprinkling of the fashion that’s on trend if appeals to you.
4. What’s on the inside matters.
Without health we have nothing so take steps to nurturing a healthier and stronger body. You don’t need to change ‘everything’ all at once, take baby steps but make sure you follow credible advice. Sometimes health and lifestyle changes fail, that’s ok, just get up and dust yourself off and try again until you find the what works for you.
5. Surround yourself with cheerleaders. Sometimes when we
need help we also need someone in our corner cheering us on. Surrounding yourself with toxic negative people is NOT what you need so cut those people loose or limit
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time spent with them. Being around happy, positive people will rub off because that good stuff is contagious. It’s a new year, a clean slate so to speak, take the opportunity to invest in yourself. Change doesn’t need to be a financial burden, in fact the best changes cost nothing. Start small and I promise those small changes will make a ‘big’ difference in how you feel about yourself and your body. I’d love to see you over on my social media channels, find me at Styling Curvy here https://www.facebook.com/stylingcurvy/ Or if you’d like to be a part of the private and closed group Body Loving Babes then hit this link https://www.facebook.com/ groups/523019694519705/ Or check out my blog here http://www. stylingcurvy.com/
Written by: Jenni Eyles Jenni is a coffee loving, tech challenged on line blogger who loves a chat. She’s not a fan of gardening but a total lover of fresh flowers, who needs to see the ocean daily. After breast cancer crashed her party and turned life upside down she grabbed life by the ponytail and now lives each day to the full. A cancer thriver who empowers women everyday through positive body image and personal style.
manifesto for
working mums
the right way is the one that works for you!
no one can do as good a job as you
STOP THE GUILT trust your instincts keep chasing your dreams
look after YOU
only you can live your life, do it your way! in the eyes of your kids, you are
super mum
leave the housework
REMEMBER, tomorrow
do it all
but it will be worth it
is a new day!
Don’t try to it might not be easy ask for help FIND YOUR CHEER SQUAD love what you do and you’ll never work a day in your life
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