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ARTWORK: Maddy Brown
eating out with @anu_food_reviews INTERVIEW BY ELIZABETH WALKER
@anu_food_reviews is an anonymous instagram account reviewing all the culinary delights the ANU Campus has to offer. I met with the mysterious figure shaking up campus food culture on a characteristically grey Canberra morning. They are punctual, friendly, but clearly mean business. While pillow creases have barely faded from my forehead, they have been up for hours. We rendezvous at Coffee Lab, where my offer to shout drinks is turned down with a knowingly raised eyebrow. Of course - a student of fine tastes. I should have known. After exchanging pleasantries, we get into the meat of the food review scene. What is the most profound food experience you’ve ad on campus? It was about three-thirty in the afternoon, and I was with a friend, dying for a coffee. The only place open was this (they gesture to Lab). Coffee Lab is okay, it’s about the same level as Coffee Grounds to me. On this day, I could see that the staff were just
over it, and had already started cleanup. I ordered a mocha, and took a sip. It was the worst mocha I’d ever had. I’m not actually that picky about coffee, I don’t waste food, I don’t really care if the beans are burnt. Maybe if the milk went bad, only then I would care. But this was seriously. The worst coffee. I’d. Ever. Had. It stirred rage. A profound rage. I’ve never been that angry over food before. Realistically it probably wasn’t that bad. It was probably just three-thirty and I was tired. But it was disappointing. Like a 79 when you needed a high distinction. Disappointing. How do you prepare before going into a food review stuation? I do my research. I look into their menu and decide what I’m going to get. If I know what I want to eat, it tells you more about the quality of their customer service, if I can get exactly what I was wanting. It’s all a mind game.
