Editor-in-chief Alyssa Africa www.alyssaafrica.com Art Director Cenon Norial III Photographers Cenon Norial III Alyssa Africa Fashion Stylist Jhobes Estrella COVER: Contributors Anjel Alcasabas Seb Chua Gerald Castillo PHOTOGRAPHED BY: Carlo Miguel Saavedra Cenon Norial III Patricia Salonga Francis Anabo STYLED BY: Aidx Paredes Jhobes Estrella Dyna Jimenez Dana Lee Jana Lei Macaya Cheyser Pedregosa Emily Deshotel Ira Giorgetti Inquiries/ Advertisements/ Submissions contactadhdmag@gmail.com www.adhdmag.blogspot.com
TABLE OF CONTENTS
FASHION
50 ROUGH RIDE THROUGH MELANCHOLY WALLS 64 THROUGH THE BACKYARDS OF OUR NEIGHBORS 72 ORGANIZED SCENERY 86 LUSCIOUS & LOVELY & FILTHY 94 ALMOST UNCONSCIOUS 104 NEW IN TOWN BLOGGER 110 AIDX PAREDES 116 IRA GIORGETTI
ART
6 SHATTERED HEARTS AND BROKEN GLASS 10 PATRICIA SALONGA “Known and will always be distinguished for the signature bangs”
24 FRANCIS ANABO
“Half of my heart is for lead- tainted, acrylicbased lucid dreams and the other half for cutting broken people open and fixing their insides”
MUSIC 146 DRACULA PALMS 148 DJ NICO “Bringing house to the South”
Dear reader, We have created this magazine with the forethought of allowing young artists, musicians, photographers, writers, fashion designers and stylists to be able not only to cater their works but be able to speak up about themselves. We believe there are many young talented artists in our generation who only needs exposure and we would like to discover them and take the time to show the outcome of their artistic and imaginative minds. We are young artists, too and we largely share the same interest when it comes to art. That is why we have decided to build this blog along with our ambitions of creating a magazine. But we have come up with the idea of breaking apart from the mainstream image of Philippine magazines. If it’s going to be successful, that is yet for us to find out and if it doesn’t, it’s worth taking a shot. Sincerely, Alyssa and Cenon
ARTISTS MUSICIANS PHOTOGRAPHERS WRITERS SUBMIT YOUR WORKS
contactadhdmag@gmail.com
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PATRICIA
SALONGA
Please introduce yourself Patricia Anne D. Salonga, 19 years of age, incoming Advertising Arts Senior at University of Santo Tomas this June. Known (and will always be distinguished) for the signature fringe. Doctor Who fan. How will you describe your art? I’m into graffiti style. I design characters and mix it with typography (I’m fond with types. Either by hand or digital) Originally, my forte really is traditional art, like painting and clay molding, I only learned digital art last year (Illustrator), ever since then I always practice when I can. I also studied Mechanical Drawing and Perspective for 2-3 years, so I apply what I learned to most of my designs, thus explains the geometric figures and different perspectives. Right now my project is to finish the font style that I’m working on. Yey. Where do you find inspirations? Museums. Whenever I travel I make sure that I go to museums, recently I went to Singapore Art Museum and Red Dot Design Studio, and I was inspired to produce more works after that. And to the Big Klimt Book that we have in our house. He’s my inspiration. And oh, also after I watch the movies or read books that I like, I draw. What music do you listen to? It depends on my mood, when I’m stressed I listen to Jazz or classical music. My music taste is flexible, I’m appreciative. But on a regular basis I listen to Daft Punk, Arctic Monkeys, Foster The People, Feist, The Black Keys, White Stripes, D’Sound, Jamiroquai, Michael Buble, Norah Jones, Radioactive Sago Project, Simon and Garfunkel, Shout out louds, Stars, Up Dharma Down, Metric, The Smiths, Phoenix, Passion Pit, KT Tunstall, John Mayer, Panic! At the Disco, Gotye, Coldplay, Kimbra, Hall & Oates and The Beatles (I have The Black Box set right here!) I think I haven’t mentioned everything, there are too many. Haha. Name three famous artists you would love to collaborate with Mike Perry, Jeremyville, Gustav Klimt Apart from all the existing artworks can you say 12
you’re making an impact and difference in ones mind through yours? Making an impact? I hope so. Friends keep asking me if what I produce every other day is an assignment or a requirement, but I tell them that what I do is not really an assignment, I just want to produce so many while I’m still young, and while I can, and while this mind is filled with ideas. And after a few days some of my friends told me that they’re starting to produce/ practice more, I guess it motivates them somehow.
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FRANCIS A N A B O
Introduce yourself I’m Francis, 20 years old. you can call me Koko which means ‘’stork’’ in japanese. So, yeah, I’m a stork. I’m Filipino. A graduate from the college of Nursing. I think I’m gonna be a doctor. How did you get into art? I was pretty much diggin it as far back as i can remember. Probably genetics. How will you describe your personal style? I have had quite an interest in Japanese anime back in my first year of high school and up until now I believe it’s noticable in some of my works. Then I turned goth in my junior and senior year where I began exploring grotesque artworks and I believe that’s where the idea of surrealism came in. In college, I somehow drifted into making artworks in the style of children’s story books where the figures looked friendly but with their eyes gouged out of their sockets and stuff. I like to express desertion, ominousness, moral decadence and the likes in my portraits. As for personal style I would say “Surrealism” Also, I like minute details. I’m crazy about details. Fine lines and such. I almost always use pencil. I like putting floral details on beastly figures. For one thing, it sets that contrasting mood which makes an impact at the least to myself as I look at it. I just do it all to amuse myself but I wouldnt mind throwing in the idea of putting up an art show in the Asias or somewhere in Europe- doesn’t hurt to dream. Besides, from where i’m standing i can say that i still have a lot to learn. i have weak techniques that i need to work on. i’m not exactly a prodigy. But the passion is there.
What is the oddest thing that ever happened to you? Can’t remember. I have this Selective Memory thing going on so, I don’t know. Where do you find inspiration? Music. It fuels me. i start to work by emotion. certain music (like Radiohead, Deftones or Bjork, etc.) trigger an emotional stir and then i start to see things in my head and it sort of tries to summarize a certain part of it into artwork. other stuff that make me go through a similar process would be books, travelling and daydreaming. it’s sort of clairevoyant in a way. i just love it. Name artists you look up to Joshua Petker, Amy Sol, Sally Cruikshank, Justin Bau, Audrey Kawasaki and Marco Mazzoni to name a few. Future goals im planning to take on working in the medical field. half of my heart is for lead-tainted, acrylic-based lucid dreams and the other half for cutting broken people open and fixing their insides. I pull through. and if i get to make my self lucky enough, im might actually do art exhibits.
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“half of my heart is for lead-tainted, acrylic-based lucid dreams and the other half for cutting broken people open and fixing their insides� 27
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bout oddities, we have asked a their oddest experiences!
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Pretty Little You by Emily S. Deshotel
It’s been hours. And I’m still here, staring at the clock. Four o’clock, you stop breathing. Five o’clock, you’re gasping for air. Six o’clock, you stop moving. 7 o’clock, you’re as cold as ice. Your pearly white skin remains radiant, except for the red stains. Your shiny blonde hair is soaked in scarlet blood. Your pretty lips are drenched. And your sea green eyes stare into the nothingness. You’re so pretty, so delicate, so strong. I’m surprised you lasted as long as you did. But that was the fun of it. I watched as the shiny metal slowly disappeared into your chest and you feel so gracefully to the floor. Your dainty little hands reached out as if you were reaching for a savior. Your pretty little screams were music to my ears. Then you started crying. I couldn’t stand that. Your tears rolled down you checks as you coughed up blood and choked. It was infuriating. You screamed and begged, pleaded. Saying you’re sorry. Oh you were sorry alright. Sorry for destroying me, bit by bit, day by day. It was almost heartbreaking to see your soft pretty heartbeat fade away. But the satisfaction of hearing your last breath made up for that. And now you lay drenched in a pool of your lies and deceit as I stare at your pretty little body. Your body almost pleads to be taken away. To be brought to the pretty darkness and dressed up. It’s almost funny how your body pleads. I know you’ve gotten what you deserve but I can’t help but laugh at how you begged for mercy. How you looked at me, terrified. They’ll call me a monster. They will be right. But you turned me into what I am. I am this monster because of you. I’m just sitting here, listening to the clock tick, staring at your pretty little body. I’m waiting for them to come and take you away, to lock me up. But they won’t get that victory. I won’t be trapped like an animal. I look at the knife. The blade is so pretty. Still drenched in your blood, I’m holding it, I never set it down. Suddenly it’s dark. I’m free. And Pretty Little You has gotten what you deserve.
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WE WELCOME CREATIVE COLLABORATION contactadhdmag@gmail.com
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R O U G H R I D E THROUGH MELANCHOLY W A L L S PHOTOGRAPHED BY ALYSSA AFRICA & CENON NORIAL III MODELED BY GRETA WARASIWA P H O T O G R A P H E D B Y C E N O N N O R I A L I I I A N D A LY S S A A F R I C A M O D E L E D B Y G R E TA WA R A S I WA
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THROUGH THE
B A C K YA R D S O F
O U R
NEIGHBOURS
Photographed by: Cenon Norial III Modelled by: Marinella Africa Shoes by Sophisticat Shoes facebook.com/sophisticatshoes
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ORGANIZED SCENERY Photographed by Alyssa Africa Modeled by Alexe Villamarzo and Cenon Norial III Accessories worn by models made by Ann Galeon
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LUSCIOUS
LOVELY FILTHY PHOTOGRAPHED BY CENON NORIAL III MODELED BY PAOLA NORIAL
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A L M O S T UNCONSCIOUS PHOTOGRAPHED BY CENON NORIAL III STYLED BY JHOBES ESTRELLA MODELED BY ANJEL ALCASABAS & WEDNESDAY AFRICA
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Shoes by Shoe Time designed by Sheen Di 97
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motion editorial: http://adhdmag.blogspot.com/2012/07/adhd-motion-editorial-almost-unconscious.html
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NEW IN TOWN
PHOTOGRAPHED BY DANA LEE
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photo by cheyser pedregosa
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paredes li ve yo un g be wild run free
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Please introduce yourself Aidx Paredes, almost 18. Although I’d like to believe I’ll be 17 forever. I’m an amateur fashion photographer, aspiring stylist, and blogger from Davao City. Describe yourself in five words Young. Fresh. Dark. Cynical. Free. When and how did you start blogging? I started blogging when I was in high school. I started posting photos from my fashion shoots in Tumblr, and then the poetry came out, and when I reached college, I started talking about things in long paragraphs and photos. But then it was early 2011 when I really started blogging – from photo sets, fashion posts, events and random things, mostly about fashion and photography. How would you describe your photography style? I would say predictable and edgy. Predictable because I have this mindset that whenever I take photos and 112
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edit them and maybe post it somewhere, I want people to directly recognize that it was from me. Predictable in a way that is not boring, and that’s where edgy lives – edgy because, I think, I mix a lot of things in my photography. It’s a blender full of different things. I like experimenting, I like getting weird stuff and putting it in the shoot. I don’t follow the exact photography rules, and I honestly don’t know all the things that other photographers say. I create my own photography world, that’s why when people ask me to teach them, I have a hard time explaining things to them. That’s because I create my own photography terms, my own world in photography. What do you like about fashion? I like fashion in a way that it helps people find their identity. Fashion gives out trends every now and then, and then people look at it and it as well. If they like it, they stick to it – they become their own fashion trend. What music do you listen to? Indie and unknown songs, well to my friends – I love listening to songs that people do not know. It’s selfish, but somehow I keep my music to myself. The only ones I share are the songs that I know they would like. What inspires you? Everything. Cliché, I know. But the world is my mood board! It’s the biggest corkboard and all the things are pinned to it. You just need to choose a group of things that you would like to inspire you today, and then change it when you feel the need to improve. But basically, from the empty lots you see while strolling up to the beautiful houses with amazing
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architecture, you could really inspiration from everything.
find
Any words of advice for people who want to start blogging? Have a clean and beautiful layout. Learn to take good photos. Know what kind of blogger you want to be. Don’t rant, online. Don’t backbite other bloggers, online. Be yourself when you blog, don’t fake things. Be honest. As much as possible, keep the anonymity of yourself, it’s nice to leave your readers a bit of mystery. Don’t take critics personally. Take inspiration from others, and inspire others also. Promote yourselves. And last but not the least, if you ever start blogging, for the love of the blog lords, UPDATE CONSTANTLY. Name a few people you would like to work with David Guison. Cenon Norial. Valerie Chua. Everywhere We Shoot. Mich Dulce. Kermit Tesoro. BJ Pascual. Lauren Young. Saab Magalona. People in NYLON Magazine. And all the coolest hipsters all over the world. Do you think you’re inspiring people with what you do? Yes, because they tell me I inspire them. Because, at a young age, I encourage them to embrace all the opportunities and exaggerate the talents they have. What is your favorite quote? “Live young. Be wild. Run free.” This is a quote I made inspired by my own blog title, Young Blood.
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IRA GIORGETTI
Who is Ira Giorgetti? I am Ira Giorgetti, and I am a photographer, an occasional model, a visual artist, and a vampire. How and when did your interest in photography begin? I started being interested in photography when I got my first dSLR back in early 2010, been at it ever since! Have you had any formal training in photography? Not really, a few seminars and stuff but mostly from books and practice. About to start a class though! Where do you find inspirations? Everywhere. I try to inspire myself. What type of music do you listen to? Everything except country. How will you describe your photography style? Dark. Sometimes visceral. Balanced. What are your future plans as a creative individual? I want to travel the world creating and sharing my art. Any words of wisdom you would like to share with our readers? If you’re going through hell, keep going.
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jana lei macaya
Day 1 Someone poked my foot. I woke up. It’s 4:30 am in the morning. I realize I have a 6:00 am flight. My dad was waiting in the door. We moved. I slept in the airport with three bags on foot. I moved in to a new apartment with my brother
Day 2 As I was enrolling in school, I saw these two Indian ladies in line. On my way home, I saw a pug that looked like my pug.
Day 3 Living in to a new apartment feels spacious, and alienated at the same time. I was about to cook when I saw this elongated egg in the refrigerator.
Day 4 Nothing special happened.
Day 5 She’s like Madeline, she wears a pair of two. She’s shy, prettified, and doesn’t give a clue She can turn into water in rays of blue She thinks she’s in the cloud, someday, Will her dreams come true?
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Day 6 I talked with this computer technician for 12 hours. Half of my day was spent talking to him. He helped me a lot in my computer though. And he was very nice.
Day 7 A picture that reminds me of a lover
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Today I cut my bangs
Day 8 It’s odd how exchanging of chocolates in the class happened today. I mean, they are all adults.
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Day 9 The study of Pathology. I went to the Laboratory room to look at these slides. This is a photo of a cell of an ectopic pregnancy. The first time I looked at it, I see it as an abstract painting. Being a medical student is hard and I have lost most of my time just reading, reading & reading. And memorizing. And another one. There were plenty of slides, 85 all in all, but I just want to preview this.
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Day 10 I went to church today and I’ve seen this ethnic group from Africa. They sing really well. I was amazed how exotic their hair looked like.
Day 11 My friends and I were invited to this dance kinect party. It’s not really popular in Manila, but the game is really cool! I saw this 50-year old mom who grooves like she’s a teenager. I was like, whoa.
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Day 12 I met this strange-looking teacher in Pharmacology Class who looks like halfmale & half-female. And she’s a joker. And yes, she’s a she.
Day 13 Hello Coward dog, aka Great Dane At the end of the day, I was walking home and saw this big dog walking by. It’s the first time I’ve seen a breed of it. It looks like a human though. Day 14 Today I find myself being forgetful. I forgot my time schedule in class, I came in very early in school & my class was supposed to be an hour late. At lunch time, I walked into the wrong class, and I forgot I was supposed to sing in front of the whole freshmen students, but there I sung.
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Day 15 I realize that life is all about dreaming. One day, you wake up and think of the things you want to do. Dong it, doing it‌ Done. The next day you think of your next step and the next day and the next day and the next day and the next day until you have come in a long way.
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Day 16 Purple eggs and a ham. No. I don’t eat pork. I used to love this book, Dr. Seuss in my childhood years. I just remembered it now. Anyway, what I had for breakfast were these eggs with salad! It made my fingernails pink!
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Day 17 Last night, I dreamed of marrying a Rockstar. The other night, I dreamed of marrying a priest. And the last two nights, I dreamed of becoming a widow.
Day 18 I made sailor hat for two hours.
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Day 19 I went to this man-made island paradise. “Cast away” theme party with Medical Students! We were in sailor suits, Juniors were in Pirates, Seniors were in Godesses & Freshmen were in Hawaiian’s.
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Day 20 Three words: cold, cool & clumsy
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Day 21 Today is all about teambuilding. One of the weirdest game I’ve ever experienced is 10 people stepping inside the tarpaulin. The principle is to flip the tarpaulin into the other side without stepping out beyond the tarp. It was awkard, but fun!
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Day 22 I was at the mountain top. Day 23 Pale Vomit Cramps Sunken eyeballs Cold sweat I was sick today Uggggghhhhhhhh. Day 24 I am still sick & I took three exams today. Day 25 I think the dust particles has made me sick.
Day 26 A little girl, that looks very old. Her hair is curled, and tips unfold I saw this old-looking small little girl this day. And she was holding a basket. This is her feet. She doesn’t want to be photographed. So I just took a photo of her feet. Day 27 When your classmate told you to hook up her sister and your brother.
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Day 28 I got burned in my forearm by cooking. I placed colgate. And the colgate got stuck in the burned part. When I release it, it’s shameful.
Day 29 One of the rarest breeds I’ve seen. A dwarf Pomeranian from Japan. Her name si Snow White
Day 30 Amazing how the arachnids and the cold-blooded genus are in much war: Spiderman on screen
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SUB MIS SIO NS
artwork by dyna jimenez
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sculpture by seb chua
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Poem by Emily Deshotel
ADVERTISE WITH US! contactadhdmag@gmail.com 145
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Hello, please introduce yourselves! We are Jack and Jake (in no particular order), from the band Dracula Palms. We come from your speakers. What is the story behind the name?
DRACULA PALMS
We were using different names but nothing we really felt. Jake’s girlfriend at the time actually learnt hypnotism and tried to put him in a trance to see if he could come up with something. I didn’t work. A fruitless endeavour. But basically Jake came in one day and said, “so, we’re called Dracula Palms” it sounded like the name of some backwater hotel on Miami beach in the late 70’s so we ran with it. The name itself has somehow helped shaped our sound into what you hear today. I think Dracula Palms precedes us….what ever that means. Aside from a mix of electro, funk and pop, tell us more about your music, how will you guys personally describe it? I don’t think we are even sure. We use a lot of different sounds and we like bands that do the same. Ariel Pink’s new album is similar, there are so many different genres and sounds in that album. I guess we are sort of like that. Although its only really the funk/pop tracks that people heave heard at this stage, but we wouldn’t exactly identify ourselves as a funk band. I think our next few releases will give people a clearer picture of what our sound is. But we like to use bass lines as hooks, this much we are aware of. Our future tracks will be a little more ambiguous to genre. What are your inspirations? Science, Cartoons, Huxley, Conspiracy theories, Drugs, Syd Barrette, Films, Octopuses, Schrodinger’s Cat. Lastly, how will you guys describe yourselves? Use 5 words only! Trying to solve the paradox..... Thanks so much dude, you seem lovely, we like lovely people haha. Hope those answers are ok. Thanks again! Stay in contact and we will send you our next single!. Good luck with ADHD. Cool name also.
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DJ NICO bringing house to the south
Please introduce yourself
Hey everyone, I am Enrico “Nico” Ylanan. Twenty years old and a proud student of De La Salle University Science and Technology Campus located all the way in Sta. Rosa, Laguna. I grew up in the Metro and moved to the South a few years ago. Trust me; it was a welcome change of pace and setting. What do you do? At the moment, I’m busy being a full-time student at my university and currently taking up my Bachelor’s Degree in Information Systems. At the same time, I am a freelance DJ and the resident DJ of DLSU – STC. It’s a tough act to follow, but it sure keeps me busy each and every day. Aside from DJing, I absolutely love automobiles, and mixing at a big car show will always be on my “to-do” list. I am also into Arisoft and Football, which I have done about half my life, but have recently been biking and trying out other sports as well. So you could say I’m a jack of all trades, but a master of none. Okay, I’m kidding. It’s all great stuff. How did you become interested in becoming a DJ? Okay, this will be a long one. My family has always been a major influence in what I listen to. My parents exposed me and my brother to different genres and eras of music at an early; basically nothing was left untouched. Over the years, we learned to appreciate all types of music, whether it was some tunes from the times of the crooners to the late disco and funk tracks of the early 70’s and mid 80’s. Simply put, all bases were covered. It also helped that we actually bought records and CD’s from reputable sources and listened to them all day. It was really awesome stuff appreciating such a wide range of musical choices. It came to the point that I knew more about 70s and 80s songs more than my uncles and aunts! There would be times on the radio where I automatically knew the track, just by the bass line. Music was always there, and when I would hear stories of my father and uncles trying some mixing back in their day, I said, why not? By 2005, after having a substantial amount of music exposure under my belt, I started to learn how to DJ on a laptop; just the mouse, keyboard, my iTunes playlist, and a whole lot of luck and frustration. It was a hobby of mine for a while, and only recently, I have gotten serious about it. I purchased my own equipment and software because I wanted to keep improving and moving up in terms of experience and confidence. I kept learning new things along the way, like different ways of transitioning and EQ mixing. Every session was a discovery. It came to a point where I was confident enough to play my first gig. Sure, it was a school prom, but to reach the level where you have the guts, let alone, play and
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mix for a dance floor full of people is every DJs ultimate goal. I still keep going until this day, finding unique and interesting ways to surprise not just the people, but myself, as well. Describe your music: As I said earlier, I knew a lot and heard a ton of music over the years, and a DJ really needs to have a wide set of genres ready to play. But what really had me was House music; anything with a four on the floor and a solid kick that could get the room moving. I absolutely love the bass lines and pianos of house tracks; it is an evolution of modern day disco. It still has that old-school vibe to it, but with the technology and finesse of today’s equipment. Progressive House is another genre I play regularly. It’s an edgier version of House music; the solid kick and beat is still there, but with some Techno and Electric patterns, riffs and strings; it’s like House music’s angrier, drunken brother, but, boy, when you drop a beat or melody that everyone knows into a solid beat, the floor goes crazy. I think that’s the allure of House. It’s so pervasive in modern music, that you can practically add vocals or words from any track and mix them up to a solid, dance-able beat. How do you know what to play? It depends on the venue and the mood of the room and its people. A DJ needs to be able to analyze and read people and how they behave. Based on experience, House is always a definite winner in all my gigs. What inspires you? This is a tricky one, because my inspiration comes from many sources. First, it’s 150
the excitement and energy of playing live. Nothing can beat that. The dancing, the solid music, the reactions of people, it all comes down to that. Leaving the crowd with musical memories and giving them a night to remember. That is my goal in every gig and set and that is what keeps me going and looking forward to every opportunity to play. Lastly, I am always searching for those special tracks that haven’t been played or released yet, and, of course, I would absolutely love to play them first I my gigs. It’s the thrill of finding, discovering and listening to new tracks and music that also keeps me going. It’s the wanting of the moment that, when you play this unique track, people will remember and say, hey, yeah; DJ Nico Ylanan dropped that one first! I am always searching for new tunes and adding them to my playlist based on the genres I am looking for. Who inspires you? It has got to be my family and friends. They always give me the support and the love I need to keep doing what I’m doing. They helped expose me to different genres and styles of music, gave me feedback and excellent criticism when I asked for it. Every set I do is a culmination of my relationships with people. Not exactly directly, but on a subconscious level. I may play a few tracks based on an idea or tip a friend may have given me, but I totally forgot about it. But the idea and execution was there. All those elements help shape my style and delivery of music and the way I connect with people. Top DJs such as Grant Nelson, Kaskade, Paul Oakenfold and Mark Knight to name a few, also inspire me. Do I want to be like them someday? Maybe, but to reach that level requires a determination and set of resources I can’t obtain right now. I pick up on a few tricks from them, and, really, the only thing I want is to hopefully play at their level someday. Name people you would like to work with: Oh, haha… This one is tricky. I would definitely want to work with local DJs in the clubs. DJing isn’t just about the music; it’s also about that tight community and party scene. In would be an honor to mix with the likes of Martin Pulgar, Aryan Magat, XFactor and Bombi Blaquedria, and at the same time, learn from them and their years of experience. In the future, when I do start producing, I would definitely want to work with local artists as well. We can only guess who will be big in the future, so, to be safe, a good friend of mine back in grade school, Zia Quizon. She has a great voice, and hopefully, would be willing to help out. But time can only tell… What are your future plans? Right now, I want to keep playing and getting gigs. I am relatively new with only a few years experience, so every opportunity is a learning experience. I am also looking at getting a few guest slots in some bars and clubs in the Metro. This might be a little trickier because of my schedule as a student, but I’m sure something can be done about it in the future. The next big thing is production; which is a long term goal, actually. We are looking at some recording studios or doing some bedroom recording at first and mastering it later on. All it takes is time and resources, both of which are difficult at my current stage, but we are totally geared toward that. We already have some web presence in the form of social networks and online listening sites. We just need to build on that solid foundation and keep getting noticed! Thanks so much! 151
on the M83 Hurry Up, We’re Dreaming Listen to: Wait, Steve Mc Queen Heavy synths and ethereal vocals; A dream come true album. ♦♦♦♦♦
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Princess Chelsea The Cigarette Duet (European Tour Edition) Listen to: Cigarette Duet, Good Night My Little Robot Child Cigarette Duet is a combination of gradual soft melodic sounds with obtuse speed that progresses all throughout the track. ♦♦♦♦
The Antlers Burst Apart Listen to: Hounds, Every Night My Teeth Are Falling Out Stealthy and delicate. An underrated album contrasting its predecessor’s hype. ♦♦♦♦♦
e loop The Velvet Underground White Light/ White Heat Listen to: The Murder Mystery, Here She Comes New, Sister Ray Lo- fi and classic garage band sound with a female voice that would occasionally visit every song. The velvet Underground tells a story. It’s like listening to someone narrate with sick and obtuse instrumentals on the background. ♦♦♦♦
Pepper Rabbit Red Velvet Snowball Listen to: Allison, Rose Mary Stretch
Silver Swans Forever Listen to: Secrets, Actual Pain, Around You
Great integration of musical instruments plus strong vocals resulting to a very haunting feel. ♦♦♦♦
It has a dreamy, dark and pure melodic waves of female- fronted, electrodream pop tracks. It’s an extremely sweet guilty pleasure for your ears. ♦♦♦♦♦
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THE WAR INSIDE by Xavier Ortiz
The back sky echoes in agony on this remorseful night. It’s my story to write down what’s happened. My times, my experience, it’s a nightmare, but alive in a way that it’s too surreal to even exist. This, this madness, no, not that shitty punch line of 300 but literal madness that this world can have happens. You see, my story can’t be something that people blow off, or see and end too. It’s funny, to write an experience in what I saw and felt, but you know, I think I’ll let you take this over. Dearest to the reader of my life before my eyes and not to know what’s happening; God bless you to see how a nightmare can become reality, following life like a game. But here’s a fact: Life is not a game, things happen in real life and to make a note, this could really have happen, and the news can hide me with propaganda and flash news of lies and tales. But well, you may think of this, but then again don’t blow off my story. My beloved, my name hidden to the world, you may be male or female, young or old, adventurous or timid, but do not take wholly to heart this tale, for sometimes in night this could echo and kill you slowly on the inside. I warn you my tale, and I give you caution to what may take over and send you messages subliminally. I shall tell you my tale, but you shall be what this story is about… -------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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It’s dark, so dark you cannot tell whether your eyes are open or shut; no feelings anywhere in your body, no feet, eyes, ears, or hands. Nothing exists in your new world. You have no time sense, no senses at all; it could be days, months, years to see if what’s happened. No knowledge, no memory, nothing. You’re trapped; no ways to even think. Paranoia creeping through you though, with things and thoughts echoing in your own imagination or dreams, what if you’re being watched? Controlled? To be monitored, to be watched, something watching your movements, thoughts, an even diving into you subconscious, seeing even you deepest dreams and fears. You try to feel anything, trying to feel your lips, to try and grasp words on where you lips would be. Thinking now starts to hurt, pain driving, but you don’t know where or if it’s even real; flashes of thoughts pop in and out, eating you from the inside out, until you try to fight an idea creeping in to your thoughts. What if you’re dead? No feeling, no senses, it all makes sense. But now you question everything. “Why am I thinking?” “How did I die?” “What happened?” You just remember a wonderful experience, a small get together with your companions and friends at a café for someone’s birthday or celebration. Wait… Now you remember, you were celebrating your old childhood sweetheart’s engagement to someone they left you for. But then, what happened? Was it a gunshot? Blacking before the death came up? Sudden heart attack? Even the healthy can get them in rare occasions. Were you killed in your sleep? Murdered? Accident? You can’t stop now, question everything; question your very existence now. What about that man on the news who escaped federal prison, seeking out to kill anyone for his own pleasure. But now you’re jumping, you’re missing desire, missing pleasure. What are you to do? What if you have a sexual desire and yet you having nothing to do? Are you to imagine your previous life with such whores and sex images? What if you forget them? Or get nothing from them now? It’s hard now; you jump around in your soul and mind. What about love? What about questioning what’s happening without you? No… No more pain you say to yourself, no more questioning, you have eternity for that. Give up, something says to you in your head, stop fighting, and accept your death. No, not when something has happened; fight you say, stand up and see what’s happened. You feel obliged to now fight. You scream at yourself in your mind. How could you let this happen? How could you let someone down almost! You let yourself down to die! You scream at yourself louder and louder, but stop, doubt has entered the system now. You stop, silence, scary silence. It’s over you think, but as your mind dulls, you stop everything to something… a faint sound. It…it was breathing, your own breath kept you alive, it kept you sane! But you couldn’t tell several things. Are you truly alive? Are you imagining this breathing? You stop to hear this breathing more, inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale; you hear this rhythm; it’s real. It’s yours. But how ca you not hear it? Confusion not sweeps thought, but then panic strikes you cold. The breathing stopped. Panic. Why is there no more breathing? Why is quiet again? True doubt, you betrayed yourself now, leading to final conclusions eating at your very soul. But everything settles and you try to give up again, but you’re stopped to a faint sound barely echoing in the emptiness. Buh-bup… buh-bup… buh-bup. 155
Yes, it is your heartbeat, you’re alive. But how you ask? You question everything again, searching the darkness, screaming in your head for answers but denied at every corner. Stop the madness! You scream at everything for freedom to yourself! But what’s this…? You hear something, like a cat screeching to a child almost ripping its tail off. Screeching, screaming, howling your now alive lungs out, you demand for anything and everything but stop, you feeling something, arms and legs; movement. Yes, they have feeling. Now you kick and flail, screaming and howling, fighting for your life. Victory is in your grasp, but only to be stopped by a light brighter than the sun blinding and disabling you. Now dazed, demanding, possibly delirious you can feel gravity and push yourself up from a cold, hard, and metallic ground. Picking your hands up and rubbing your eyes, you have full feeling again. You finally open your eyes to a burred picture only for a split second before your eyes meet a size 12 shoe, right between them. Pain, like fire, seared up your nose; making you scream again and fall straight on your ass. You attempt to pick yourself up again, only to be kicked in the gut and to the ground you go again. You search the proximity with your dull eyes, and manage to make out two figures; a delicate female frame and built male frame. You felt warmth running down your face, it was blood obviously. “What is this…?” You try to ask as a punch crashed into your stomach, making you drop a knee and spit out blood. Muffled words echo from them, barely audible but you manage to read their lips and paraphrase what they say. You make out to see that you were wanted by Russian socialists also the research on the next bomb that will end the War on Terror. It’s something that everyone wants, and something that you feared to even explore. Unknowingly you had spoken in that death trance supposedly, some new drug or medical warfare they know, but they had run it dry on you. Draining you of secrets, taking all you know and transferring them to what they need. They know everything, who you are what your past is, they know your whole life and you barely remember who you are yourself. They threaten to kill you, saying you were obsolete now, your secrets are gone and you have nothing more to give. They step forward to kill and you step back, gaining full control of your body. Now angered, they warn you now, they wanted a clean kill, no mess. They got the wrong thing now, all because of you. Your heart now starting to race, blood pumping, adrenaline rushing through yours veins, you manage to jump back from their charge and run for your life, remaining silent as you run down a deep, bright corridor. Hearing shouts and yells behind but you finally stop to a clamp around your mouth and being dragged into a dark room. “Shh--they’ll here ya...!” A small, harsh voice whispered into your ear. You open your eyes and not look up, but down, to a small Hispanic girl, possibly nine or ten years of age. She smiles up at you and releases you. “Sorry, but I had to.” She had a full accent like yours, but appeared like something else, but as a common saying goes: everything is not as it seems. She looked into a hallway then at you. “I knew that they couldn’t hold a hero… C’mon, I know a way out; I was waiting for you…” She leads your through the small room slowly, almost too cautious of the area. You go to speak but she silences you and points to a small vent in the floor. “Escape here… She gently picked up the cover and pointed down. “You can get out and escape into Moscow from here.”
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Moscow? You’re in Russia? You question more, but you stop to question her. She refused to answer and pushed you to the exit. “Go.” She smiles and looks, checking for safety. Something about this little girl confuses you, making you dare to ask questions to her. Who is she? What’s her name? Why is she here too? Everything is spinning in your head, wave after wave of confusion hitting your head and eating at you in curiosity. You make the fatal flaw that you think is okay to do, you lower your guard; Hell breaks loose. The door is busted down and the girl screams and pushes you towards the vent. “Go! Get out of h--!” She completely cut off to a gunshot to her back and collapses to the ground with a very light thud. No time for remorse! GET OUT NOW! You jump and escape into the night, the life of a real hero wasted for one that now doesn’t exist. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------Such a sad story that I lived, is it not? I am the vain on existence to that girl who died. But now you question everything. How did a girl save my life? How did this story come to exist? Do you honestly expect someone to say that this is an exceptional thing to write? Well, I don’t know what to think as my life is nothing now as I dedicate something to no one or expect a Novel award for this short story. I bid you farewell my friends and enemies. As for me to you, a word or thought: If one cannot tame the war that goes inside one’s head, how can one them even attempt to tame the one that goes outside them. Sign a treaty for your sanity before signing one to make a promise that never existed.
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