Feb2014

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FEBRUARY 2014 ISSUE 33

FREE www.affinitymag.co.uk

February 2014

LOVE

Sphere of Love is the perfect heartfelt gift for a loved one.

The heart pendants all carry uplifting messages for any occasion, and come in stunning red packaging.

AFFINITY LUXURY LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

Everything you need for that romantic Valentine’s Day

Wonder Woman

Take the Quest challenge

BEAUTY - FOOD - DRINK - HEALTH - FITNESS - STYLE - INTERIORS - MOTORS - WHAT’S ON

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:45 Page 1

11-13 St Peter’s Street, Bedford MK40 2PN www.bakerbrothersdiamonds.com

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NEVER UNDERSOLD POLICY

we will not be beaten on price for a true ‘like for like’ package

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Welcome...

Hi everyone Love is in the air at Affinity this month as we celebrate Valentine’s Day and all things romantic that go with it.

for our Do’s and Don’ts if you’re on your own for Valentines Day.

We have a selection of gifts for him and her, lingerie guaranteed to get his heart racing, as well as a selection of food that will melt anyone’s heart.

If you’re feeling a little dizzy from all this talk of love and romance, don’t worry, we still have all our regular features, including the wine and champagne that the stars will be drinking at this year’s BAFTA’s and one lucky reader can win a bottle of each of these wines, page 24 tells you all about it!

If you want to spend some romantic time with that special person in your life why not whisk them away to Wyboston Lakes for their special offer of Buy One get the other HALF PRICE on their Y Love Day see page 28.

If you want to travel a little bit further with your sweetheart then why not pay The Bedford Lodge Day Spa in Newmarket a visit, you won’t be disappointed and if you decide to make a night of it why not stay over at their adjoining hotel, turn to page 70 to find out more.

Happy Valentines – Be Good & Have Fun!

Jane x

Don’t despair if you’re single this Valentine’s - that doesn’t mean you can’t still have fun and LOVE yourself, we at Affinity are here to help you out so turn to page 36

Cover Image Victoria’s Secret

Editor: Jane Fry jane@affinitymag.co.uk 01234 215523 07507 602401 Advertising Manager: Julia Crofts julia@affinitymag.co.uk 07966 696784 Graphic Design and Photography: David Zita dave@affinitymag.co.uk www.affinitymag.co.uk

facebook.com/AffinityMag

@affinitymagz

linkedin.com/pub/jane-zita-fry

All adverts are printed in good faith. Affinity cannot take responsibility for the content of adverts. Advertisements are accepted on the understanding that descriptions of goods and services are accurate. Reproduction in whole or in part is strictly prohibited.Printed in the UK by Regal Litho 01908 270400

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CONTENTS 14 Fight with fruit 16 Skip the gym?

24 WIN! BAFTA wines

30 Treatment of the Month 32 Luxurious lingerie 38 Just for her

42 Delectable dining 44 Food of LOVE 51 Love Interiors

56 64 69 70 72

Marvelous mugs When Citroen met Benefit Kids in training It’s a date Wildly wicked

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Can Food Raise your Mood and

Lower your

Anxiety Levels?

P

eriods of depression and raised anxiety levels are becoming more and more prevalent in our fastpaced, highly stressed culture. Most people will recognise the name Prozac, a commonly prescribed antidepressant, and many swear by its mood enhancing effects; equally, others will find it has little or no effect or completely the reverse effect on their mood and ability to cope with life’s demands.

Low levels of another neurotransmitter dopamine have been linked to depression. Increasing levels are achieved by eating foods rich in another amino acid called tyrosine.

There are numerous food sources to choose from in order to provide variety in your diet, including avocado, almonds, pumpkin and sesame seeds. Deficiencies in Vitamin B12, magnesium and folic acid may also contribute and need to be addressed as well to support the whole process of boosting dopamine levels. Eggs, brown rice, wheat germ, whole grains and green leafy vegetables, mackerel and cod are all an excellent addition to your diet.

For mild or moderate depression and anxiety we may well find some surprising answers in food! Food has both the potential to contribute to the cause of the problem as well as help in its resolution. Some foods, which we may be intolerant to, may trigger bouts of depression, equally, certain foods can help to lift our mood and reduce our anxiety levels.

There are other factors that can have an adverse effect and contribute to depression, such as poor circulation hence the advice to take regular moderate exercise to help lift your mood and sense of wellbeing. We, often as a result of resorting to coffee and simple carbohydrates in cakes, biscuits and chocolate to boost energy levels results in unstable blood sugar levels . The peaks and troughs in blood sugar levels which occur proves counterproductive in the long term and results in depression and weight gain, which makes us even more miserable.

The most common food allergies, which are linked to depression, are fast foods, additives, dairy, wheat (or more specifically gluten), eggs and citrus fruits or it may be something quite specific, such as tomatoes, soy or shellfish. If you are intolerant to a certain food, the symptoms may not show themselves for a few days – unlike an allergic reaction which is immediate – and they are many and varied. You may experience skin problems, lethargy, insomnia, irritability and anxiety or dark circles under the eyes. You need to be quite vigilant and watch out for any symptoms and, as they appear, record them and then see if there are any patterns which emerge.

The amino acid tryptophan is a natural mood enhancer, but also needs to be eaten with carbohydrate to be effective. Turkey, bananas, cottage cheese and dates are rich sources of this nutrient which helps in the production of serotonin. This neurotransmitter has long been linked to raising low mood and lowering anxiety levels. As Prozac works to raise serotonin in the brain, tryptophan has gained the nick name of Nature’s Prozac.

I like to use herbs as well as adjusting diet for anyone wanting to address depression and anxiety with a more natural approach. There are many herbs available which can address both depression and anxiety and bring sugar cravings under control, whilst simultaneously boosting energy levels and circulation.

If you would like help in developing a sense of relaxed wellbeing with diet and herbs. please contact me :

10

Carolyn Woods- Herbalist and Naturopath 07944 886502 www.vedatherapeutics.co.uk

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Vamp with Bad Apple

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Be a Valentine

Sophisticated yet modern, the new gel like nail varnish from British brand Bad Apple Cosmetics is a perfect compliment to this winters tartan and block colour fashion and will accessorise any valentine lingerie you may choose to lure him with!

Included in the colours is a trio of dynamic reds : - Jelly Ruby Apple, Jelly Pink Apple, Jelly Red Apple, based on 70’s cars such as the TVR, are bound to turn any nails into a valentine vamps!

Applying is easy just brush on with quick strokes for a smooth application, build up the colour strength with two coats. Leave the first coat for 8 minutes and the second will dry more quickly and can last up to 3 weeks.

Bad Apple nail varnishes are non-drip, no chip, high gloss and no UV lights or bonds. All these nail varnishes do not contain Formaldehyde, Toluene, DBP or Parabens.

£6.95 (14ml) each or £19.99 for set of 3

www.badapplecosmetics.com

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Fight That Flu with Fruit Are you stuffing your face with oranges to keep colds at bay? Well STOP! Researchers from Oregon State University say you’re reaching for the wrong fruit. After studying hundreds of different fruits they discovered red grapes and blueberries are the real heroes in boosting immunity. They’re the only two fruits that provide compounds that activate your immune system, allowing it to operate as effectively as possible.

Even a whole bag of oranges can’t compete with that!

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Box End Park

www.sculptfitness.info

‘30 spin bike studio’

‘10 classes a week’

Mad Dogg Certified Instructor

Endurance Aerobic

Cardio Strength

See website for great opening offer!

Pay as you go £5 No joining fee No annual membership No contracts

“Get into the be st shape of yo

ur life”

Sculpt Fitness Studio Bespoke Lifestyle & Fitness darren.garrett@sculptfitness.info 07889 966106

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Can I Really Skip the Gym? Yes you can - with these 10 Quick No Gym workouts that you can squeeze into your day and still see the benefits

Taking an hour out of your day to go to the gym is sometimes just too big a time commitment or sometimes you just don’t have the motivation. So instead why not try squeezing in shorter, convenient, strength training and cardio workouts throughout your day (at home or at work). Try to fit several of the following workouts into your day instead of going to the gym.

If you’re a beginner, just do one or two and gradually build up.

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As Good as a Long Workout?

If you’re concerned that smaller workouts won’t have the same impact as one longer workout at the gym, think again. When it comes to achieving weight loss and aerobic fitness, studies seem to suggest that exercise accumulated in several short bouts has similar effects to exercise accumulated in one continuous bout. In other words exercising for three 10-minute intervals during the day versus exercising for 30 minutes all at once achieves the same health and fitness benefits.

Pre-shower Cardio Before you shower in the morning, break a sweat with a quick cardio burst. Try jumping jacks, pushups and crunches for at least five minutes to get your heart racing and energy flowing before you start your day.

If you’d rather remember your school days grab that skipping rope and get jumping - this is one of the best cardiovascular exercise there is. The skipping rope is a low impact, full body cardiovascular exercise that simply annihilates calories. Begin with six minutes of skipping and workup from there.

Teeth brushing = Toe Raises We can all multitask can’t we? Whilst brushing your teeth, co-ordinate this with toe raises. This targets and strengthens the calf muscles. Stand with your feet a few inches apart, push down through your toes and lift your heels. Repeat until you have finished brushing those pearly whites.

Add some Squats to your Blowdry Think of how long it takes to dry your hair: that’s valuable time you could be using. Whilst blowdrying make sure you alternate your arms as you dry to get an even workout. Then try adding squats to work your legs and bum too. Standing with your legs hipwidth apart, lower your glutes toward the floor. Be sure that your knees do not come over your ankles.

From the seated position lift back up to standing and repeat until your hair is dry or your legs are shaking - which ever comes first.

Social Workouts If you’re penciling time with your friends or partner, try opting for a fun exercise class, dance class, hike or even just a nice leisurely walk. The aim is to think of working out as part of the lifestyle you want, and not a chore you have to do.

Lunch Break To boost your energy for the afternoon, schedule in a brief 10-minute workout during your lunch break.

If your building has stairs, try running or walking up them a few times, this will really get your heart pumping. Alternatively go for a brisk walk outside.

The cardio and fresh air will help prep your mind to tackle anything that comes your way.

Swap your Chair Let’s be honest they look ridiculous but the benefits are worth it; what am I talking about? - Balls!

Stabilizer balls aren’t as rigid as chairs, so sitting on the ball requires you to strengthen your core, improve your posture and strengthen your back.

Research has already shown that sitting at a desk all day may have detrimental effects on your health (i.e., risk of Type 2 diabetes), so sitting on a ball instead of a regular chair might not seem like too crazy of an idea after all.

Chair Dips If you’re having a brain freeze over a difficult project or assignment, or just killing time at home, take a few minutes and do a few chair dips.

Sit on the edge of your seat, grabbing the edges with both hands, shoulder width apart. Lift your bum off the seat and walk your feet forward, making sure your knees don’t bend. Keep your shoulders back and chest up and slowly lower your bum toward the floor.

Stop when your arms reach a 90-degree angle.

Straighten and repeat.

Single Dance Party People often forget that some of the most fun things in life are actually great workouts as well. So turn up your iPod and get dancing. Embrace and enjoy it, because pretty soon you’ll be breaking a sweat and having a great time - not to mention pumping up your heart rate and burning calories.

Couch Potato?

Who says spending time watching TV can’t benefit you? Whilst catching up on your favorite show do several sets of wall-sits, instead of slouching on the couch. It’s a great exercise for the hips, thighs and bum. Press your back up against the wall and slide down until you look like you’re sitting in a chair. Try to stay in that position for 90 seconds, then you’ll know what I’m talking about!

Couch time is also a great time to fit in an upper body workout. Grab some small weights (or even cans from your cupboard) and see how many bicep curls, shoulder raises and tricep kick-backs you can fit in during the advert breaks.

Bedtime Planks Before hitting the sheets, take a minute to plank.

Planks benefit your core, arms and back, as well as being one of the top calorie blasting yoga moves.

Starting in a full push-up position, align your spine in a straight line. Support yourself with either your palms flat against the floor under your shoulders or with your forearms resting on the floor (elbows under your shoulders). Concentrate on breathing deeply and tightening your core for support. Set a timer on your phone and see how long you can hold the plank position (aim for 30-60 seconds).

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:46 Page 17

Qualified nurse since 2003

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1st treatment or course

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d to be?

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at it use h w t o n emory

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Midlife Madness Death to the inner Doormat

I

know that not everyone is like me and I kind of suspect that my ‘doormat’ tendencies have got worse with age, but really, they simply have to stop. It happens all over the place, with all sorts of people, in all sorts of situations - often when I least expect it. But there it is, this doormat part of me that rises up and suddenly, rather than explaining in a calm, though firm, manner that I am not able to do, say, or be what is requested, I find myself agreeing to all sorts of additional tasks or responsibilities that I could well do without.

run which involved painful sessions at the gym, why I have bought numerous, as yet unworn, items because someone said they looked good and yet even at the time I knew they were mistakes (a bodycon dress? Me? Really?) but I couldn’t quite summon up the necessary assertiveness to utter that simple little word ‘no’.

And don’t get me started on the kids, I mean yes I love them, obviously, and I know that as a parent of grown children I am, by simple virtue of the fact that I am their parent, both embarrassing and irritating, but I have also come to notice that they obviously think being over 50 means you have no life. So they ask if you can do something, and they may even preface it with an ‘if you’re not doing anything’ but the look of abject shock on their face when you mention that you did actually have plans, which you are obviously happy to cancel, tells me that they really didn’t think for a moment, it was possible at my age.

It can be anything from babysitting, which I must confess I love, to helping someone move, entertaining someone with their foreign visitor, or even feeling that I have to say yes to attending some party or social function with folk that I would struggle to be stuck in a lift with. Obviously I would struggle simply being stuck in a lift, but if I know someone and can think to myself well I’d hate to be stuck in a lift with them, then what on earth am I doing electing to spend time with them, assuming that, in fact, I have free will and can exercise choice and am not actually stuck in a lift.

As for services, well I cannot tell you the number of rubbish meals I have put up with, either without complaint or with some token ‘I must really point out that’ or ‘I’m sorry but I must mention’ before I just capitulate, acknowledge that yes they were very busy and of course I understand. It’s different if I write a letter afterwards, somehow my inner doormat lets me do that.

It is the face to face connection I can’t handle.

But that is the problem, anything for a quiet life. Actually, I suppose, the real problem all doormats have is that they harbour the notion is it easier to say ‘yes’ to almost anything that is asked, rather than a ‘no’ which might risk upset.

So that is why I have found myself making multiple cakes to sell, doing sponsored ‘things’ myself - quite against my better judgement, sponsoring numerous other folks doing ‘things’ like leaping out of aeroplanes (usually with parachutes), climbing mountains, swimming lakes, riding bikes or horses or even on occasion, a llama.

It is also why I have stood in the rain for hours with a friend who wanted a bargain on Boxing Day, why I have had sixteen for Christmas dinner and ten staying over after a family party, why I have the neighbours kids after school twice a week, why I got roped into doing a charity

But it is all going to change. I have practised the ‘no’ word in front of the mirror and find to my surprise that I can indeed say it. I stutter a bit and my face sort of twitches, whilst my hands clench but the word does actually come out of my mouth.

So I am armed and ready. I can and will say ‘no’. Why? Well because I must, I am important too, my needs count as well. But mostly because at my age I have earned the right to do what I want and that is what I am going to do!

Death to my Doormat I say.

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WIN! WIN! WIN! Toast the BAFTAS with your very own Wines!

Later this month on Sunday 16th February the EE British Academy Film Awards ceremony will be taking place and to celebrate, Champagne Taittinger and Villa Maria invite you to sip like the stars! As the official Champagne and Wine Partners to BAFTA, Champagne Taittinger and Villa Maria wines from New Zealand are delighted to offer you the chance to win a special BAFTA branded bottle of Taittinger Brut RĂŠserve NV, a bottle of Villa Maria Private Bin Sauvignon Blanc 2013 and Villa Maria Private Bin Merlot Cabernet Sauvignon 2012, as served to the glittering guests at the Awards.

Adding extra sparkle to the awards, Taittinger is the

only leading Champagne house to remain owned and actively managed by the family named on the label.

Taittinger is widely available. www.taittinger.com.

Villa Maria has been New Zealand’s most awarded winery for over 30 years and remains proudly familyowned. Villa Maria wines are widely available in all good retailers. Visit www.villamaria.co.nz To be in with a chance of winning this great prize just tell us "What date will the BAFTA's be taking place this year?" and send to info@affinitymag.co.uk Terms & Conditions: Entrants must be 18 or over. Entrants must provide a mainland UK address and telephone number for delivery. Visit www.bafta.org for more information.

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Love is all around

Asia Lounge

Celebrate Valentines Day with our set menu 3 courses only ÂŁ24.95 per person

FREE Champagne Cocktail for every diner!

Pan asian restaurant & bar

66 High Street Bedford MK40 1NT 01234 365366 / 360075 www.asialoungebedford.co.uk

Opening Times: Monday - Saturday 12pm - 2.30pm 6pm -11pm Sunday 12pm - 11pm

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Y Love for a Day L

ooking for some love and romance this Valentine’s Day then why not whisk your loved one off to Y Spa at Wyboston Lakes for some couples time?

Single? Doesn’t mean you have to miss out grab your bestie and enjoy some quality catch up time with them.

Y Spa has a fabulous Valentine’s promotion that will continue to the end of March (don’t forget Mother’s Day is coming up; why not grab some Brownie points with your mum by treating her!)

Y Love for a day is a day that’s designed for couples, friends or family; it’s all about sharing quality time together in a wonderful environment that promotes relaxation and relieves the stress of everyday lives. It includes full use of the spa’s thermal facilities, 2 course lunch, a Y Spa Fresh Face Facial and a Y Spa Hot Stone Back Therapy - pure escapisim The treatments included in the package are carried out in a dual treatment room which just adds to the whole together time , the facial uses Elemis products and is designed to leave you feeling re-balanced and de-stressed - leaving your skin glowing.

The Hot Stone Massage is complete relaxation using the ancient therapy that uses therapeutic heat from the stones, which is slowly released into the heart of the muscle, releasing tension from the back which greatly enhances relaxation.

This ultimate day is £149 per person and until 31st March 2014 – BUY ONE GET ONE HALF PRICE! You can even extend your day into an overnight stay, which includes all of the above plus Dinner, Breakfast a Rasul Mud Pie and a Y Spa Back Rub instead of the Hot Stone massage.

The Rasul experience is perfect to relax, cleanse and detoxify your body. Different coloured medicinal muds and a facial mud are applied to the face and body, whilst you gently inhale infused steam. This is perfect to cleanse the respiratory system, smooth the skin and detoxify the body.

Y Spa has created a fabulous space which will stimulate all of the senses and leave you completely refreshed, ready to go back into the real world.

Gift Cards are also available for the Y Love for a Day and the same offer of Buy One Get One ½ price applies and are valid for 12 months from the date of purchase.

Y Spa Wyboston Lakes 0333 7007 667 www.yspa.co.uk

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Treatment of the Month

Lash Perfect

What lengths are you willing to go to for a sexy flutter like Katy Perry or Adele?

M

ost women don't have the time or patience to apply fake eyelashes every day. (We barely have enough time to use an eyelash curler!) So it's no surprise that lash extensions have become increasingly popular in recent years.

pads (once on you don’t even know they are there.) You then have to keep your eyes shut whilst your therapist applies each lash individually. The only discomfort is when the glue initially goes on, it can feel a little itchy but this sensation quickly disappears.

It takes me ten minutes to build my lashes into something reminiscent of a sex siren, so when Beauty by Roxanne asked me to try out her Lash Perfect eyelashes I felt it would be rude to refuse – my only question “Does it hurt?”

And that’s it! Once the treatment’s finished you'll have a stunning set of lashes that will have you looking and feeling fabulous and leave you wondering how you ever did without them.

The process is simple and takes around an hour; the eyelashes are synthetic strands that are individually applied to your natural lashes using gentle bonding glue that doesn't damage the natural lash. You can choose what look you want from the thickness, dramatic or delicate and, of course, the length.

A full set of Lash Perfect eyelash extensions costs £65.00, which includes the first top up for FREE (*must be booked within 2 weeks of having the set done). You can also have a half set of lashes which is ideal for those who may not wear mascara on a day to day basis this is £32.50

After a brief consultation to ascertain what look you want you lie on the bed and relax (what more could you want?)

Your bottom lids are softly pressed down with silicone

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Beauty by Roxanne 07872 146804 www.beautybyroxanne.co.uk

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Moschino Loves Disaronno Limited Edition £15 Sainsburys

Cath Kidston IPhone 5 Case £24.95 Cathkidston.com

Radley & British Heart Foundation £209 Collection Bag

Floozie by Frost French Heart Bag £25 Debenhams

Dr Martens 8 Eye Boot £100 Schuh Midsummer Place Shopping Centre

Heaven Skincare 3 Wick Candle £100 heavenskincare.com

Acne Studio Blue Leather Jacket £115 House of Fraser

Dolce & Gabana Sunglasses £145 Shadestation.co.uk

Mens at Dune Bailey £75 Dunelondon.com

AFFINITY HOT PICKS This month’s must have gifts and accessories

Bad Apple Nail Polish £6.95 badapplecosmetics.com

Oilily Spring Ovation Laptop Bag £94.95 oililyshop.com

Biba Starburst Teapot £30 House of Fraser

Rikki Buckle Chunky Cut Out Boots £38 simmishoes.com

Silver Love Pendant £200 coldlilies.com

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Bra £22.50 Knickers £9.50 Marks & Spencer

Bra £14, Knickers £9.50 Marks & Spencer

Black Beauty

Matalan

Gorgeous £40.50 Debenhams

Guipure Balcony Bra £12 Guipure Mini Briefs £5 F&F Tesco

Bra £20, Briefs 310 Next

Guinevere Balcony Bra £10 Guinevere Mini Briefs £5 F&F

Lace Underwired Bra £12 Lace Briefs £5 M&Co

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rie inge L som e, Blos Arcad 0 1NS e m 6 Th rd MK4 3 ie.co r fo 1 e d 7 g e B 73 m-lin 34 2 012 .blosso w ww

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Lace Bra £14 Briefs £8 Next

Ultimate £28.50 Debenhams2

Matalan

Red Devil Matalan

Flirt Lace Bra £14, Knickers £6 Marks & Spencer

Gorgeous £34 Debenhams

Elle Macpherson Intimate Eyelash Bra £65 Briefs £36 puremarie.co.uk

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Asda

Marks & Spencer

Body Beautiful Lace Soft Cup Bodysuit £12 F&F Tesco

Limited Collection Body £25 Marks & Spencer

Jacquered Body £24 Next Vivian Mint Slip £150 Dirty Pretty Things

Body £250 Fleur of England

Lilith Lace Body £125 Dirty Pretty Things

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Do’s & Don’ts for The Savvy Single on

Valentine’s Day

Once upon a time, Valentine’s Day conjured up fear and dread in the hearts of singles. But no more! With a fresh perspective, a healthy dose of hindsight and your friends, Valentine’s Day can be just as fun for the singleton as it is for the happily hooked up.

By putting into practice the following do’s and don’ts, you’ll embrace your single status this Valentine’s Day and beyond.

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DO………..

Give Thanks for the Ones That Got Away Remember all those “have to have him or I’ll die” obsessive loves from your past? Well have you seen them lately? There’s a reason you’re not still together so count your blessings and the divine intervention that made you split up! They were SO not the one for you! And luckily, you’re now free to find someone far better and suited for you.

Spend the Day with your Friends Instead of sitting all alone on your couch crying into your tissues this Valentine’s Day, invite your girlfriends over for a singles soiree of board games and cocktails, a decadent dinner party, a movie marathon, or a pampering evening of mani-pedis – Fabulous!

Celebrate your Single Status Sometimes it’s hard to remember the many advantages of being single so on Valentine’s Day, it’s essential to celebrate the fact that you can spend your hard-earned money with wild abandon on what you want, primp and preen like the glamour girl you are without having to share the mirror, and sleep as late as you want on weekends. Not to mention you enjoy the freedom to go anywhere, do anything, and flirt frivolously without having to answer to anyone.

Splurge on Yourself Go ahead – on Valentines Day buy yourself something special. Treat yourself to a girl-tastic gift (a little bling, a heavenly massage, or those killer heels you’ve been hankering perhaps?) Splurge without guilt because you deserve a little extra TLC on the big day!

DON’T………….

Feel Sorry for Yourself Rather than sit around and mope about your single status, refocus your efforts on Valentine’s Day by practicing random acts of kindness. Pay a visit to the elderly and bring them cupcakes and a smile.

Shower your fellow single girlfriends with affection and compliments. Give your pampered pets extra special smooches and with a little perspective, you’ll have a whole lot more fun!

Drunk Dial your Ex It’s okay to get a little lonely on Valentine’s Day. But that’s no excuse to drink like a fish and drunk dial your ex. In fact, if you feel the urge to email, instant message, or text on the big day, stop, turn off the technology, and reboot your brain. No good can come from a weak moment down memory lane.

Remember there’s a reason they’re an EX!

Be Ashamed of your Single Status If and when you run across a frienemy or some other horrid human who tries to make you feel inferior for being single on February 14th, summon your inner strength and remind them as well as yourself that you don’t need anyone on your arm to feel super gorgeous. Being single is a state of mind and yours is oh-so-fabulous!

Think of Going on a First or Blind Date Even if you meet someone you really like right before Valentine’s Day, don’t set your first date for the big day. Talk about pressure and mismanaged expectations! Plus, being surrounded by couples kissing and cuddling is sure to make a first date awkward and uncomfortable. Instead, schedule that first date for the following week. In doing so, you’re off to a much more fun and freeing start with someone new!

Remember as a singleton, Valentine’s Day is nothing to stress about.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:49 Page 36

LH ove

er Repose EDP £45 Hotel Chocolat

Silver or Gold Spinning Heart Charm Necklace from £55 cleasilk.com

Elemis Top to Toe Beauty Skincare Collection £55 timetospa.co.uk Ralph Lauren Bag £280 House of Fraser

Green Amber and Silver Leaf Ring £85 www.monartti.com

Ecoya Sweet Pea & White Jasmine Candle £39.99 Libertys of London

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Elice Mules £295 Agent Provocateur

Guess watch £149 Debenhams

Silver or Gold Plated Silver and Parachute cord HELP for HEROES Bracelets Gents style Ovals £79.00 Lady’s Style Diamond Set Hearts £99.00

Agent Provocateur Parfum £25.75 allbeauty.com

Rosie for Autograph Rose Silk Teddy £45.00 Marks & Spencer

Gobstopper Shoes £55 Schuh, Midsummer Place MK

Oval Amber in Twisted Silver Bangle (Cognac) £245 www.monartti.com

Emma Bridgewater Mug £19.95 emmabridgewater.co.uk

Leather Mibi ipad Case £129 Hugo Boss, Midsummer Place MK

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 38

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 24/01/2014 12:43 Page 39

April Flowers

Valentines Day Say it with flowers

We are a leading florist in the Bedford area, catering for all your floral needs April Flowers

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 40

Dining Delights at

The Black Horse in Woburn 42

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 41

O

n a cold wet evening in January we headed to The Black Horse in Woburn, a quaint Georgian village on the outskirts of Bedford and Milton Keynes. The Black Horse is part of the Peach Pubs chain that also includes The Embankment in Bedford and The Swan at Salford. With its exposed beams, cosy décor and a modern ‘Best of British’ menu, teamed with an exciting and varied wine list and real ales, you can be assured of a warm welcome and great dining experience every time.

After said warm welcome by Deputy Manager Ed, we were shown to our table to mull over the the treats the menu had to offer. Once choices were made we enjoyed the olives and bread that had been brought to us.

Choices were a combination from the menu and from the specials board - Lemon & Coriander Marinated Pan-fried Squid (specials board) and Crispy Tidenham Duck, Carrot & Spring Onion Salad with Hoi Sin Sauce were our choice of starters - presentation was faultless. The amalgamation of flavours of the tender squid were divine. The duck was crispy, cooked to perfection and delicious (I could easily order this another time as a main!).

Char-grilled Woburn Venison Haunch, Dauphinoise potatoes, Kale, Redcurrant Jus was one of our choices; the venison was cooked exactly as requested, medium rare, with the redcurrant jus the ideal accompaniment to compliment the meat. The grilled Cod Supreme just flaked effortlessly onto my fork, this was on a bed of Smoked Haddock Chowder with a Pancetta Crisp.

I was assured the desserts were calorie free especially the ‘special’ - so cherry mousse with jelly and salted chocolate torte for me and Sticky Toffee Pudding, Toffee Sauce & Vanilla Ice Cream for my husband; both of which certainly didn’t disappoint, just like the rest of the meal.

The food was delicious, the atmosphere warm, relaxing and friendly and the service faultless.

Certainly somewhere I would thoroughly recommend visiting, whether it’s with family, friends or just the two of you, as once visited (ust like The Embankment and The Swan) it will be somewhere you return to time and time again, The Black Horse 1 Bedford Street Woburn MK17 9QB 01525 290210 www.blackhorsewoburn.co.uk

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 24/01/2014 12:44 Page 42

Food of Love Laurent-Perrier Cuvée Roséand Glasses Set £85 John Lewis Personalised Wine I Love You £19.99 gettingpersonal.co.uk

Chocolate Love Sharing Box £12.95 prezziebox.com Personalised Chocolate Bar Somebody Loves You £5.99 gettingpersonal.co.uk

Valentines Straight from the Heart £47 Hotel Chocolat

Valentines Love Notes £16 Hotel Chocolat

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 43

From Sunrise to Sunset Hamper £50 Hotel Chocolat

Farhi Heart Mallows £3 John Lewis

With Love Chocolate Heart Collection £15 Marks & Spencer Personalised Chocolate Card £5.95 The Chocolae Library

Nicolas Feuillatte Brut Champagne £32 John Lewis

Sweet Words I Love You £13.49 Iwantoneofthose.com

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 44

Goat's Cheese Chicken, Sweet Beets & Warm Lentils 46

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“

“

Impress your partner this Valentine's Day with a special home-cooked meal for deux

Ingredients

6 large boneless skinless chicken breasts 150g tub soft goat's cheese 20g pack flat-leaf parsley, chopped 18 rashers thin-cut smoked streaky bacon 500g raw beetroot, peeled and cut into wedges 12 shallots, halved if large 3 tbsp clear honey 350g Puy lentils 1 garlic clove, roughly chopped 6 tbsp olive oil 1 lemon, zest and juice 1 tbsp Dijon mustard 100g bag mixed green leaves

Method Heat oven to 220C gas 7. Put the beetroot and shallots into a roasting tin, drizzle with honey and 1 tbsp oil, season, and toss well. Cover with foil, roast for 1 hr, turning after 30 mins and leaving the foil off. Splash half the lemon juice over the veg when they’re ready, then set aside.

Boil the lentils, drain and rinse well. Make a dressing by whizzing the garlic, remaining oil, lemon juice and mustard together with seasoning. Add a couple of tbsp water to loosen. Set aside.

Turn the chicken breasts upside down. Cut a pocket into the thickest part of each fillet. Mix the lemon zest with the goat’s cheese, half the parsley and seasoning, then stuff about 1 tsp cheese into each pocket. Fold the fillets back over to seal. Wrap each breast in 3 rashers of bacon, then place on a baking tray.

Roast with the veg for 20 mins until the bacon is crisp and cooked through.

To serve, warm the lentils in the pan, stir the remaining parsley into most of the dressing, then tip in the warm lentils. Spoon onto plates with some of the roast beets and shallots, scatter over the salad leaves, top with the chicken, sliced in half, and drizzle over remaining dressing.

Errazuriz Aconcagua Costa Single Vineyard Chardonnay 2011 Pale yellow in colour with greenish tints, this wine offers elegant fresh tropical fruit notes with touches of quince and honey that evolve into white floral notes accompanied by a hint of truffle. The fruit reemerges on the palate, accompanied by a subtle minerality that adds complexity, elegance, and a lively acidity that adds a refreshing and juicy mouth feel. £15.99, Wimbledon Wine Cellars, Hailsham Cellars

Errazuriz Aconcagua Costa Pinot Noir 2011 A deep ruby-red colour, this Pinot Noir releases subtle notes of red fruit such as sour cherries, rosehips, and wild strawberries, accompanied by notes of forest floor, dampness, and wet earth. Toasted notes from the barrel aging display a smoky side along with pencil lead, which mingle with its slight minerality palate Good structure and smooth, friendly tannins that work well with the acidity to produce a lengthy, persistent finish. £24, Harrods

Errazuriz Aconcagua Costa Single Vineyard Sauvignon Blanc 2013 The grapes for this Sauvignon Blanc are sourced from the Manzanar Vineyard in Aconcagua Costa in the Valle de Aconcagua located just 12 km from the Pacific Ocean.

Delightful passion fruit and herbal notes combined with bright acidity and crisp mineral flavours lead to a pleasant, long finish. £12.49, Waitrose, Booths, Berry Bros, Wine Rack

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 46

Pear & Salted Caramel Semi Freddo Ingredients

Method

For the Salted Caramel Sauce: 250ml Double Cream 100g Brown Sugar 100g Salted Butter 2 large pinches of Rock Salt 1 tbs of Black Treacle

Put the caramel sauce on to start on a low heat. Put all the ingredients together in a pan and leave to simmer.

Next, peel the pears and place in another saucepan and cover with white wine, add the sugar and leave on the heat until the pears are soft.

For the semi freddo, whisk the egg yolks, sugar and vanilla until you get a thick consistency (sabayon).

Whisk the egg whites into peaks.

Fold the whisked cream into the sabayon, then fold the egg whites into the mix above.

By this time you can leave your caramel sauce to cool slightly. You then need to cut the flesh off of the pears and blend in a food processor until smooth.

Add the pear mix and the cooled caramel sauce to your finished semi freddo mix.

Pour into glasses or ramekins and freeze, remove from the freezer ten minutes before serving.

For the Pear Puree: 2 Large Pears White Wine 200g Caster Sugar

For The Semi Freddo: 1 Vanilla Pod 2oz Caster Sugar 4 Eggs - separated 17 fl oz Double Cream (soft Peaks) This sweet is brought to you by the Chef at The Millhouse Hotel Riverside Restaurant, Sharnbrook, Beds

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Veda Therapeutics Carolyn wood Herbal Medicine - Ayuverda Naturopathy - Therapeutic Massage - Ear Acupuncture

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As a herbalist and naturopath I can help you with

Valentine’s Menu Friday 14th February

Starters

Homemade Tomato and Roasted Red Pepper Soup Millhouse Fish Medley; Devonshire Crab, Smoked Salmon and Prawns Served with a Cucumber Jelly

Duck Trio; Smoked breast of duck, Duck Paté and Lollipop Served with a Berry Salad

Main Course

Duo of Beef; Medallion and Slow Braised Blade Served with Sautéed Cabbage, Potato Rosti and Bordelaise Sauce Corn Fed Chicken Supreme Served with New potato, Chive Cake and Wild Mushroom Cream

Pan Fried Seabass Fillet Served with a Chorizo and Mixed Bean Risotto and finished with a Chilli and Lemon Oil and Micro Leaf Salad

Vegetarian Options are available upon request

Millhouse Assiette of Desserts A selection of sweets presented to enjoy together…

Crème Brulee Homemade Ice creams and Sorbets Chocolate Brownie Pineapple Shot Passion Fruit and Mango Mousse Tea and Coffee to finish

£25.00 per person, including a gift for the ladies 01234 781678 info@millhouse-riverside.co.uk www.millhouse-riverside.co.uk millhouse_hotel Millhouse Hotel and Riverside Restaurant Mill Road, Sharnbrook, Bedford MK44 1NP

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 48

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 49

Look of

LOVE Wall Heart ÂŁ84 lornasyson.co.uk

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 50

Rustic Wooden Be Happy Sign £3.95 dotcomgiftshop.com

Bertie & Jack 'Love Birds' £45 John Lewis

Love Print £6.95 dotcomgiftshop.com

Wicker Heart £3.95 dotcomgiftshop.com

You Had Me At Hello Framed Print £16.99 mollieandfred.co.uk

Heatons

Le Creuset Heart Dish with Lid £45 John Lewis sainsburyshome

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 51

True Amour Cushion £65 frenchbedroomcompany.co.uk

Love Is Patient Keepsake Box £21.99 mollieandfred.co.uk

Knitted Cushion £35 graciebows.co.uk

Hearts Champagne Glasses £15 redcandy.co.uk

Blackboard Heart £12.99 retreat-home.com

Limited Edition LOVE Home Candle £42.00 Neomorganics.com Debenhams

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 52

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 53

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 54

Marvelous

MUGS Clotted Cream Tea Mug £6.99 Mollie & Fred

Debenhams

Debenhams

G 'n' T Mug £12 House of Envy Grammar Grumble Mug £7.95 The Literary Gift Company

Hen Mug £8 Marks & Spencer

Fox Mug £5.95 Hunkydory Home

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 55

Totally Fabulous Mug £7.95 The Oak Room

Humourous Gordon Mug £6.60 Doris & Boris

Lamb Mug £6 Marks & Spencer

Bunny, Mug £6 Marks & Spencer

Chick Mug £6 Marks & Spencer

Purr…fect!' Cat Fine Bone China Mug £9 Sophie Allport

E-Type Jaguar Car Mug £21.40 Gift Wrapped & Gorgeous

Pig Mug £16.95 Laura Lee Designs

Humourous Mug £6.60 Doris & Boris

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 56

A £38m Tree House

The Valentines Gift Idea For Billionaires

T

he Master Wishmakers based in Northamptonshire and specialists in magnificent themed architecture and interiors - have worked with the luxury US lifestyle magazine, Robb Report, to create a 20,000 sq ft tree house featuring a rooftop pool, a helipad, and a water operated elevator. This concept will cost one lucky (deep-pocketed) buyer £38m.

Hot on the heels of completing Challis Island – a handmade pirate island in Cambridgeshire, England - The Master Wishmakers have been up to their antics again by designing what has to be the world’s most luxurious tree house. The proposed design entails five separate pods connected to a central trunk that is crafted from load-bearing steel and clad in sustainable hardwood planks, which will be lightly airbrushed by their scenic artists to ensure that they blend with the surroundings.

The five pods are connected to the main trunk via enclosed glass walkways and each pod could house amenities such as a gym, spa, napping quarters with hammocks and tree-themed bunk beds, a vivarium or even a library.

Two years ago, Sergio Rosella co-founded The Master Wishmakers to create everything from luxury playhouses, themed children’s bedrooms and furniture. “Everything we do is about fun,” Rosella says. “It is always bespoke, and we just let our imaginations run wild.” All of the creations that come out of the company’s Northamptonshire workshop are handmade by master craftsmen and they pride themselves on the high standard of design, quality and attention to detail.

Though Rosella’s vision for the gift does not involve a living tree, he sees the project taking shape in a heavily wooded environment, where the central structure would be virtually indistinguishable from its surroundings. Ideally, the recipient of this gift already owns a large woodland space in which to build the tree house, but it is not necessary. “If someone lives in the desert, we could easily import the trees,” Rosella says.

“As we proved with the construction of Challis Island, this tree house is completely buildable in any given scenario.”

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:50 Page 57

G. Butler

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Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 24/01/2014 12:44 Page 58

All About Name: Peter Thompson/PT Denis Age: 28 Occupation: I operate under the alias of PT Denis and I am a Personal trainer with a difference

If I was stranded on a desert island I would firstly take my bicycle gym so I could work out. I would also take my skipping rope and maybe even a protein shake.

What would you do if you had a time machine?

I would go back and change certain things that I did wrong in the past, and maybe I would have found my skipping rope sooner.

You can’t leave the house without?

I cannot leave the house without my skipping rope (or several)!

If I take a look in your fridge what would I find?

Mainly meat, vegetables and peanut butter to fuel my training. I don’t diet and exercise, I eat and train.

Describe yourself in three words?

Unique, Dedicated, Inspiring.

What makes you stand out in a crowd?

I am an incredibly motivated person. I have a very positive attitude which I am using to change many young people’s lives. I am also a bad ass drum and bass skipping performer, there is no one like me. The bright orange shirt also makes me stand out… blink and you won’t miss me!

If you could meet anyone in the world dead or alive who would it be and what would you say to them?

It would have to be Andy C. He is the world’s number 1 drum and bass DJ and his music has motivated me. I have been trying to perform with him for the last 2 years, so if I ever make that reality,

Your top three movies?

‘Rocky 4’ as it is an incredibly motivating film, ‘The Matrix’ as I love the concept, and ‘Happy Gilmore’ Adam Sandler cracks me up! .

If you were a biscuit what would you be?

It would have to be a bourbon cream. I suppose this biscuit is similar to me, tough on the outside, with a softer centre.

Who is your inspiration/role model?

My inspiration is my father. He unfortunately passed away several years ago and I was unable to have the relationship that I perhaps wanted to. Everything he taught me, even though I didn’t listen to him at the time, I am now acting out.

What do you do to relax?

I like to relax in the swimming pool in the mornings. I use the swimming time to relax, breathe and think clearly.

Your most extravagant purchase and why?

Probably the skipping rope tattoos I have down the sides of my body. Skipping saved my life and my life story in dates, symbols and words run along the skipping ropes that flow down my body.

What is the one gadget you couldn't live without?

It would have to be my wireless mp3 player/headphones. It travels everywhere with me and I use it to fuel all my training.

The music gives me energy and keeps me motivated.

If you could be anyone or anything what would it be?

I would want to be a speaker. I get a massive kick out of music and going to large music events and festivals to listen to my favourite dj’s. I can only imagine what the speakers must feel like based on the feeling I get, but that’s assuming the speakers can feel the music which I am sure they can.

Where do you see yourself in ten years?

I am not really sure and I wouldn’t like to guess. Sometimes I believe the pathway we walk along is in someway out of our control. But one thing I know for sure, is that the more positive attitude you are able to apply to various part of your life, the more positive outcomes you will experience.

Describe your ideal woman?

Somebody that is caring who has a similar outlook on life to me, someone that understands what I am about, takes me for me, and perhaps also has a similar goal of motivating others.

If you were stranded on a desert island, what three items would you take with you?

PT Denis Can be contacted at: ptdenisendurance@gmail.com skipbeatz2013@gmail.com 07921162923 www.ptdenis.co.uk @PT_Denis @SkipBeatz_UK

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Fry’s Footie Corner January Transfer Window Madness

I

hate the transfer window in January.

I have agreed deals with five different clubs for the transfer and registration of their players, but have failed to agree terms with agents and players. It is a very frustrating time for managers, for owners and of course, for Director of Football! There is no money about and players’ wages are not increasing anymore, in fact when their contracts are up, they will find a big decrease in their salaries and sometimes they won’t even get a club.

This is down to the amount you can spend on wages thanks to the new Financial Fair Play ruling. It is a difficult time for all, but still agents demands are outrageous. However, they are only doing their jobs. I blame FIFA for sanctioning the use of agents. Football is in for a great shock, but that doesn’t help me getting players over the line.

This is very frustrating for me. Everyone in football will tell you that the January transfer window is about panic buying.

There haven’t been that many big money moves in this window like in previous years with Andy Carroll and Fernando Torres going for obscene money.

Year after year, clubs pay above the odds by panicking at the end of the window, only to regret their actions. I am for one, delighted the window is now firmly shut and we can get a bit of stability into clubs and use the rest of the season to obtain our objective, which is to win promotion back to the Championship and winning the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy at Wembley.

Although the window is shut, in the Football League there are still Emergency Loan’s available up to 92 days. Thank goodness! This is not allowed in the Premier League, but is vital for Football League clubs. FIFA are trying to abolish this, but that cannot happen, because it is a restriction of trade for the lower league clubs.

Barry Fry 61

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LH ove

im

Cognac Amber Round Sterling Silver Cufflinks £68.50 www.monartti.com

Montegrappa Giuseppe Verdi’s Rigoletto Fountain Pen Gold £16,965 - Silver £2,500 Harrods

Superdry Mens Fragrance Set £29.50 superdry.com

Love Heart Post It Notes £3 John Lewis

The Art of Travelling £49.90 Elemis

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 24/01/2014 12:46 Page 61

Men's Sterling Silver Ring Cherry Amber Triple Stripes £78 www.monartti.com

Bread and Butter Print £25 Marks & Spencer

Hugo Boss Watch £310 nigelohara.com

Viktor & Rolf SpiceBomb £47 Debenhams Ted Baker Tan Satchel £210 House of Fraser

Socks George at Asda

Personalised Heart Handle Mug - Love £12.99 gettingpersonal.co.uk

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:51 Page 62

WHEN CITROEN MET BENEFIT!

C

itroën UK and Benefit Cosmetics have collaborated on a one-off version of Citroën’s DS3. Called DS3 by Benefit, the colourful model is an exploration of ideas and themes in a unique concept form, which marks the start of a new partnership between the two brands.

Benefit’s spiritual home – along the side profile. The stylish alloy wheels are detailed in white and pink with the Benefit logo on the wheel rims, alongside the Citroën chevron centre caps. The yellow wing mirrors offset the pink body, with the floating roof sporting the pink and yellow ‘Candy Stripes’ pattern.

The Citroën DS3 concept premiered at Clothes Show Live last December.

The interior has been reupholstered in fine Italian leather with the Candy Stripe design on the seats, headrests and parcel shelf. Pink detailing features throughout, such as on the steering wheel, dashboard and centre console.

There is also a ‘hello gorgeous’ graphic on the passenger side of the dashboard.

DS3 by Benefit is based on a range-topping DSport powered by Citroën’s sporty THP 155 engine. On the exterior, the concept uses colours from the Benefit palette with the brand’s signature pink and yellow ‘Candy Stripes’ motif and a graphic of the San Francisco skyline –

Bespoke LED lighting, luxurious deep pile floor mats with 64

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usual mode of transport, but that’s what makes it so special. We really hope to take things further and translate some of these ideas into a proper road-going Citroën and Benefit DS3 collaboration. Watch this space!”

Jules Tilstone, Marketing Director at Citroën UK added: “This concept collaboration with Benefit has allowed us to explore more female themes for DS3 line and reach out to new markets. Benefit is a globally recognised cosmetics company, but they also have a strong brand image that is bold, energetic, stylish and individual whilst also being fun and playful – a perfect match for DS3. Bringing these two personalities together was a fantastic opportunity and I hope it’s the beginning of a beautiful relationship.”

pink leather edging and Benefit ‘Iconic words of wisdom’ scatter cushions add to the custom features and the armrest has even been converted to house a custom makeup kit containing a selection of Benefit products.

Other smart touches include a handbag hook, fragrance dispenser, and an ornate vanity mirror emerging from the dashboard.

Ian Marshall and Gail Bojarski, Managing Directors of Benefit Cosmetics UK, said: “Benefit has never shied away from doing things a little differently; it’s evident that we share this brave and creative ambition with Citroën and DS3 line. We love this concept and there’s no doubt it will make gals across the country smile no end. It’s so bold but girly with the Benefit graphics, colour scheme and the many female-focused features and solutions. Not your

65

MEN take note - What a fabulous Valentine’s present this would make all you have to add is the bow!

Affinity Feb2014.qxp_Jan 2014 Aff 22/01/2014 19:51 Page 64

First Love When someone mentions first "Love yourself first and everything hate aspects of their body or love many people go dewy eyed personality. While this may not else falls into line. You really with memories of a teenage be the central cause of all their have to love yourself to problems it certainly doesn’t help. crush, but what I mean by first get anything done love is the necessity of actually in this world." being able to love ourselves in order Well Being Lucille Ball to enjoy happy relationships and There are many things we can change experience true well-being. about our lives, if we are unhappy, but there are also some things that we can’t or which are at least difficult to alter. There is a lot we can do to Working with people experiencing emotional issues I am struck again and again by the fact that change our appearance, and despite popular belief to many people find it very difficult to accept themselves, the contrary many personality issues can be successfully their motivations, perhaps things they have done or not changed. Attitudes and motivators which make us behave done, decisions they have made or chances they have in certain ways can be altered, when there is a will to do so, though this may need some professional help. missed, let alone love themselves. Some people positively 66

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But that said, many aspects of ourselves are fairly ‘set’ and even for those that can be changed unless we are really going to devote time energy and possible money to address them it is simply a waste of time, energy and emotions to constantly beat ourselves up about them.

Often our unhappiness with ourselves stems from lies we believe about ourselves, or have been told and these untruths can be about any area of our life.

“You’ll never be any good at that.”

“You always look so scruffy.”

“You just aren’t good with people.”

“Well you wouldn’t want a job as a manager would you?”

When I work with people around issues like these we often establish the root of these beliefs and one common root stems from things that people we love have told us. The parents who constantly repeat that their child is shy, struggles with reading, is clumsy, is naughty or is a ‘problem’ ,the friend or partner who puts us down or criticises aspects or our character, the colleague who constantly reminds us about our weakness or the boss who sets unreasonable goals or targets which compounds a sense of failure. They are all giving us a negative message.

This may be balanced out by feedback from others, but for almost all of us some of those false beliefs still exist and we hear them, You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.

How do we love ourselves?

I have often heard people say that we should treat others the way we want to be treated.

Undoubtedly there are elements of truth in this, but I also see a need for us to treat ourselves the way we treat others. I find myself asking clients who are mercilessly critical of themselves, or their actions, what would they say to a friend in their position. Always the response is that they would be compassionate and kind, they would reassure them, concentrate on the positives, and recognise their inherent value even if they have made some decisions, or taken some actions that, with hindsight, appear foolish.

Yet that is something that many folk find hard to do for themselves.

Being kind, whether to another or to ourselves is an action, it may stem from a thought or attitude but it usually involves some action, even if it is just kind words this involves speaking. Actions are things we determine to do, we choose how we will behave.

67

You can, indeed you must, be kind to yourself.

Think of what you would do to be kind or compassionate to another person, spend time with them, buy a small gift, indulge them in a favourite meal, or drink, watch a favourite movie with them, go on a particular outing, or take some responsibility off them so they have time to relax.

So make sure you do some of those things for yourself, it is not selfish it is essential, simply because whatever responsibilities you may have towards others YOU are important too.

Enjoying relationships It is very evident that people who struggle to accept themselves often struggle to enjoy relationships with others. It is not surprising really, ‘how can someone else possibly love you’ – the inner voice may say. Many of us will have had experiences with friends or acquaintances where they have one disastrous relationship after another. We need to recognise that we all give off energy, we have probably all experienced being around people who just make us feel better, they are positive, upbeat, confident and somehow that rubs off on us. In the same way we have all probably been brought down by people who are negative and self-critical.

"My primary relationship is with myself- all others are mirrors of it. As I learn to love myself, I automatically receive the love and appreciation that I desire from others. If I am committed to myself and to living my truth, I will attract others with equal commitment. My willingness to be intimate with my own deep feelings creates the space for intimacy with another."

Shakti Gawain If we are accepting of who we are we will transmit that to others. Obviously not everyone will love us all the time, but that’s okay. If we accept ourselves we are not giving out a message that it would be a huge favour for someone to like us. If that is what we transmit then it is no surprise that relationships flounder or the wrong kind of person is attracted – someone who needs someone they can look after or dominate or who makes them feel better about themselves.

So be true to your first love – YOURSELF! For further information or advice on any aspect of well-being or relationships contact 07921193479 or email info@attunededucation.com or visit the website www.attunededucation.com

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Welcome to the musings of Yummy Mummy. Living in Bedford she is married to ‘The Husband’ and together they have 4 children - Rafferty, 9, Violet, 7, Roman, 5 and Clementine, 1.

All my views are my own and are not intended to offend anyone but alas I may frustrate you as I certainly do myself and no doubt those around me at times. I would love to hear from you, your views, questions or indeed just to share your experiences of trying to be a Yummy Mummy. Email me at info@affinitymag.co.uk

Pushy Parenting!

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efore I write this I want to point out that on the whole I am fully supportive of all the different ways of parenting and support freedom of choice – well unless it’s illegal! And nothing makes me upset more than someone absolutely determined to make you change your ways and they will not give up – gggrrrrr!!

screaming to them! When a child says I would love to go to Explore Learning as it looks fun, it is hard to say no to something that aids their education – of course we have to make sacrifices to pay for it (and thank goodness for the Childcare Voucher scheme as every little helps). Also when it comes to sporting activities we are keen for them to get active as we don’t want them to be in the 50% of the population that the Government are predicting will be obese soon, hopefully we are encouraging a love of exercise within them. The only activity that is nonnegotiable is swimming as this is a valuable life skill.

Anyway ‘The Husband’ and I are in agreement that the main priority for us when bringing up our children is that they are happy. Obviously this refers to their overall happiness and not the occasions when they are having a tantrum in the middle of the supermarket! But we also want the children to have opportunities and fulfil their potential and all this whilst they are happy – easy eh?!

Of course we get days of ‘Do we have to go’ or ‘I don’t want to go’ and sometimes we do have a battle on our hands getting them out the door. Honestly we aren’t pushy, and almost all of the time when we have this, we manage to get them to the activity and they end up enjoying it – so frustrating! Of course there are times when they really don’t want to go, so they don’t as sometimes they just need a break. Once the school Christmas holidays arrived we stopped all activities so they could have fun and recharge their batteries. If they were insistent they definitely wanted to give up an activity as it was making them unhappy then of course we would stop it, however we would want to check they were sure rather than it just being an off-day.

When I list off the activities they currently do, I can sometimes feel like a ‘Tiger Mum’. If you’ve not heard this expression it comes from Amy Chua who wrote ‘Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother’ and her take on why Chinese mums are superior when it comes to parenting and how they produce so many maths whizzes and music prodigies. Some of the things her daughters are not allowed to do include: get a grade less than an A, not be the No 1 student in every subject except gym and drama, watch TV or play computer games, be in a school play (and complain that they aren’t in it), go on a playdate or sleepover, chose their own extracurricular activities or play any instrument except the piano or violin.

As with everything to do with being a parent, getting the balance right can be very tricky, but of course the main thing is that we bring up happy and polite children.

Rest assured I am nowhere near this league but sometimes I feel that the endless round of swimming, football, karate, rugby and Maths and English tuition, as well as them wanting to go to after-school club, may portray me as a proper pushy parent. But I would like to point out that most of these activities were requested by the children and I’ve haven’t had to drag them kicking and

Yummy Mummy

Right I’m off to cancel all the playdates and replace with loads of violin and piano classes.........joking!!!

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Brantano

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John Lewis

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Trainers £16 Marks & Spencer

Hello Kitty Hi-tops Matalan

Trainers £10 Sainsburys

Trainers £20 Marks & Spencer

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It’s a Date!

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With our ESPA Time finished we headed to the Rasul where after applying the nourishing muds all over our face and body we relaxed in the private rasul steam room, leaving our skin smooth and our minds calm and de stressed.

ove is in the air this month and if you’re looking for a tranquil escape with some quality couple time then you need look no further than a visit to the wonderfully refurbished, Bedford Lodge Spa in Newmarket. It’s the perfect place if you want to fully relax, recharge your batteries and feel like a million dollars.

Lunch followed in the spa lounge, before we enjoyed the rest of what was on offer from this glorious spa – starting with the hydrotherapy pool, steam room, and sauna before having a blissful sit down, well actually I lay down on the heated poolside bench.

A spacious, modern spa with brilliant facilities, guests are spoilt for choice in regards to what to try first.

Facilities include a hydrotherapy pool with five different water settings, outdoor rooftop hot tub, Rasul, an ice fountain, experiential shower, sauna, steam room, hammam, relaxation room and a couples' treatment suite.

Next stop was the rooftop hot tub, where we enjoyed the bubbles before finally heading to the loungers located on the light airy mezzanine to drift off into a dreamland for a little while.

On arrival Tea and homemade lavender macaroons awaited us, before we were whisked away to change into our fluffy gowns ready for some serious pampering. Our first treatment was the ‘ESPA Time’ which took place in the dual treatment room with its soft music and mood lighting the ambience was just perfect. The treatment started with a luxurious foot scrub, followed by a back massage, facial and a divine head massage for guaranteed relaxation.

The massage began using a blend of individually chosen oils leaving us feeling relaxed, refreshed and rejuvenated; the facial was just as wonderful - pure heaven and a real treat.

The spa is absolutely stunning and the range of facilities on offer is impressive. Any stress you feel pre-spa visit will soon evaporate, leaving you feeling truly relaxed and pampered.

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Bedford Lodge Hotel, Bury Road, Newmarket, Suffolk, CB8 7BX 01638 676130 www.Bedfordlodgehotelspa.co.uk

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Wildly Wicked W

inner of 90 international awards, Wicked has been casting its magical spell over audiences across the world for a decade and continues to break records at London’s Apollo Victoria Theatre, where it is already the 15th longest-running West End musical of all time and it is coming to Milton Keynes Theatre this February for five days.

In a brilliantly witty re-imagining of the stories and characters created by L. Frank Baum in The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, Wicked tells the incredible untold story of an unlikely but profound friendship between two sorcery students. Their extraordinary adventures in Oz will ultimately see them fulfil their destinies as Glinda The Good and the Wicked Witch of the West.

Packed with thrilling technical wizardry, stunning costumes and show-stopping songs (by Academy Award® winner Stephen Schwartz), Wicked is an unforgettable experience for audiences of all ages.

An absolutely wicked and wonderful vision of Oz. A remarkable kaleidoscope of magical shocks, surprises and sensations - Wicked works like a dream.

Milton Keynes Theatre Tues 8th – Sat 12th February 0844 871 7652 www.atgtickets.com/miltonkeynes

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What’s on February 2014

Sat 1st February Heart to Heart Psychic Fair 7pm – 11pm Marston Vale Forest Centre In aid of the British Heart Foundation - a mind, body and spiritual fair with stalls, tarot, reiki, healing, gifts, gemstones and more come and support a great charity for only £2 entry, free parking 01234 767037 www.marstonvale.org

Mon 10th – Sat 15th February Fallen Angels The Royal & Derngate, Northampton With their passionless husbands away playing golf, a mutual, longago-lover announces his intention to pay Julia and Jane an impromptu visit. All in a fluster, there is clearly only one thing to do: hit the bottle. Or rather, pop open the Champagne! Tongues start to loosen, hidden jealousies surface, the claws come out and all attempts at demure behaviour dissolve. But it's not until the unexpected early return of their husbands that the evening really hits its frenzied peak. www.royalandderngate.co.uk

Sat 1st February Ghost Hunting at the London Tombs 9pm – 5am A ghost hunt at the London Bridge Experience and London Tombs is one which you will certainly never forget. A number of spirits and ghosts are said to lurk within the network of dark corridors and rooms beneath London Bridge and for some, the experience has been so terrifying that they have refused to return. Ghostly sightings and Poltergeist are not uncommon during ghost hunting vigils at the London Tombs and staff regularly report strange experiences. Are you fearless enough to descend into London's Underground world after dark?

You will have the opportunity to carry out Vigils and Séances with equipment including Ouija Boards, EMF Meters and Dowsing Rods, guided by the experienced Haunted Happenings team.

Price: £75.00 per person www.hauntedhappenings.co.uk

Fri 14th February Michael Buble Tribute for Valentine’s Wyboston Lakes, Wyboston On the most romantic evening of the year, you and that special person in your life will be serenaded on a date that is bound to go with a swing! Champagne and canapés included. £44.50 per person www.wybostonlakes.co.uk

Fri 14th – Sat 15th Feb Valentine’s Dinner at Whittlebury Hall Hotel Celebrate in style this Valentines with that special someone and indulge with one of these great value Valentine's Dinners: Valentine’s Dinner - £85 per couple, includes a delicious threecourse candlelit dinner in Astons Restaurant, with a gift from The Day Spa at Whittlebury Hall for the ladies Valentine's Gourmet Dinner - £130 per couple, includes a glass of Champagne and canapés to set the scene, followed by a gourmet four-course candlelit dinner in our award-winning fine dining Murrays at Whittlebury Hall Restaurant, with a gift from The Day Spa at Whittlebury Hall for the ladies 0845 400 1406 www.whittleburyhall.co.uk

Tues 4th February Circus of Horrors The Royal & Derngate, Northampton The show that stormed into the finals of Britain's Got Talent is back with its rock 'n' roller coaster of show, London After Midnight, inspired by the sinister film of the same name.

Packed with new shocks, it features some of the most daring, bizarre and beautiful circus acts you will ever see, including sword swallowers, dare devil balancing acts, hair hangers, demon dwarfs and astounding ariel acts, all performed to the devil-driven rock n' roll of Dr Haze & The Interceptors From Hell. www.royalandderngate.co.uk

Fri 14th – Sun 16th February Lovers Weekend The Embankment, Bedford Enjoy Valentines Day all weekend here at The Embankment. The chef’s have put together a special 5 course menu including Tea or Coffee, Chocolates & a glass of Bubbly on arrival for just £45pp.

Booking essential.

01234 261332 www.embankmentbedford.co.uk

Fri 7th February First Friday Club at Wyboston Lakes Every first Friday of the month come along and enjoy live music and an evening socialising with old and new friends at the Waterfront Lounge Bar. Music performed by highly acclaimed local artists. www.wybostonlakes.co.uk

Sat 8th February Blunham Book Sale 10am – 3pm Blunham Parish Church Come and browse and buy our huge selection of second-hand books, & a few new books. Enjoy refreshments - teas/coffee cakes & biscuits, home made soup.

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Thurs 20th February Live Professional Wrestling Bedford Corn Exchange This explosive night of Pro-Wrestling features all your favourite British Wrestling stars along with some of the most exciting competitors from across the world.

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Fri 21st February Abba Tribute Night 7.30pm Whittlebury Hall Hotel & Spa Let your hair down, come and dance the evening away at our ABBA fun-filled themed night!

You’ll find your feet tapping along to familiar hits such as Dancing Queen, MAMMA MIA!, Knowing Me, Knowing You, Take a Chance, The Name of the Game, GIMME! GIMME! GIMME!, Super Trouper, Thank You For The Music and many more.

Enjoy a three-course set dinner, entertainment and disco to finish at 12.30am £49 per person including a three-course set dinner, half bottle of house wine, two complimentary drinks vouchers and entertainment. www.whittleburyhall.co.uk

The return of the masked Fan Favourite "The Lion Kid" (Pictured Flying Through the Air), along with former TNA X-Division and Tag Team Champion Doug Williams, Europe's hottest talent Mark Haskins and "Party" Marty Scurll amongst others all battle it out in some of the most exciting matches seen on these shores.

Another amazing night at the Corn Exchange LIVE! www.bedfordcornexchange.co.uk

Fri 21st February Lee Hurst: Things That Make You Go Aaarggh!!!

Bedford Corn Exchange In his new tour, stand up comic Lee Hurst is travelling throughout Britain to find out what really winds you up.

Mostly people get on with living their lives, but everyone has at least one thing that pushes their button and sends them over the edge. What's yours? Come along for a night of laughter and letting off some steam. www.bedfordcornexchange.co.uk

THE BIG TOP ROLLS BACK INTO TOWN

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ollowing an incredible response to last year’s return of the circus, Frosts has brought back all the thrills and spills of the big top again just in time for February half term.

The entirely human cast of John Lawson’s Circus is lead

by Ringmaster Attilla Endresz and also features Western Pastimes with The Navadas, Miss Anya with her amazing Hula Hoops, sword and dagger balancing, trampolining, inflatable comedy bikes and no Circus would be complete without crazy clown capers!

From Saturday 15th – Friday 21st February, John Lawson’s Human Circus will take over Frosts as performers large, small and mind-bendingly flexible wow and entertain the people of Milton Keynes and beyond in a week-long spectacular.

The award-winning show has been voted ‘Britain’s Best Small Circus’ will feature new acts such as Miss Monika from Hungary and her aerial skills, Miss Georgia from Romania on the aerial rope, Ross on the rola rola, and Spiderman on the cloud swing.

There will be four breath taking shows a day, running at; 10.30am, 12.30pm, 2.30pm & 4.30pm.

Please arrive 15 minutes prior to the start of the performance. Performances last for one hour. £5.99 per person.

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0800 9549484 www.frostsgroup.com

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Give your loved ones the best gift, ‘THEIR HEALTH!’ Consultations for just £20 and first treatment for just £25!

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The Rainbow Trust Children’s Charity A

t Tudor Rose Patchwork and O For Coffee we love taking part in fundraising activities for worthy local causes. The Rainbow Trust Children’s Charity has to be one of the best kinds of charity to support. The Trust provides support for terminally-ill children and their families, setting out to do it in a caring and appropriate way. They realise that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to such a tragic and traumatic event in a family’s life and tailor their efforts to each family’s needs.

O For Coffee is running a competition which aims to raise funds for the The Rainbow Trust while at the same time engaging people’s creativity. All you have to do is to make a piece of bunting, pretty it up (oh, okay, embellish it) with braid or cord or ribbons or buttons or … anything, really, and bring or send it in to O For Coffee along with a £1 (one pound) entry fee. The competition is really simple: We will judge the bunting entries that come in and choose the best of them.

There will be prizes!

C&B Home and Garden Maintenance One off jobs to regular maintenance For all your home and garden needs

For a friendly reliable service and a free quote give us a call on 07531 491019 c-bmaintenance@hotmail.co.uk

We’re hoping to see 200 entries, which will raise £200 for The Rainbow Trust.

We have a pattern and instructions – both really simple and on one sheet of A4 paper – which you can pick up from the shop or you can email us at info@o-forcoffee.co.uk (or info@tudorrosepatchwork.co.uk) and we will send you a PDF file which you can print at home.

All you really need is some fabric and some things to embellish the bunting with.

We’ll put the bunting up in the shop for display as it arrives. After judging we’re going to donate the finished bunting to a local home for the disabled to brighten up their lives!

Why not help this fantastic organisation to help families in distress. The bunting is simple to make and could be created by anyone, young or old. There’s no catch, and we’d love to see your entry.

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A quiet night in...

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truggling legal clerk Terry Flynt is presented with the biggest opportunity of his career: to help defend a millionaire accused of murder. But the accused turns out to be someone he knows and loathes. How can he defend a man who betrayed him so badly? This case could potentially make Terry's career, but how can he defend a former friend who betrayed him so badly?

With the trial date looming, Terry delves deeper into Vernon's life and is forced to confront secrets from their shared past that could have devastating consequences for them both. For years he has wanted to witness Vernon's downfall, but with so much at stake, how can Terry be sure that he is guilty? And what choices must he make to ensure that justice is done?

Packed with twists, turns and an unforgettable trial scene, The Verdict is the most page-turning British legal thriller in many years.

Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit

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hris Pine and Keira Knightley star in an edgeof-seat espionage thriller about a rookie CIA analyst uncovering a sophisticated terrorist plot.

Young recruit Jack Ryan (Chris Pine) thought he had a straightforward desk job at the CIA. But then he uncovered a plot that could bring the world to its knees without a single shot being fired. Jack's boss William Harper (Kevin Costner) promptly reassigns him to operational status and sends him on a dangerous mission to Moscow, where the sinister Viktor Cherevin (Kenneth Branagh) awaits. But Jack has lied about his covert job to wife Cathy (Keira Knightley). And now she shows up demanding to know the truth! Tom Clancy's Jack Ryan is one of the most enduringly popular characters. This electrifying reboot from 'Thor' director Kenneth Branagh takes us back to Ryan's previously unexplored early years.

Release Date: 24th January 2014

Captain Philips

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om Hanks stars in this drama based on the real life hijacking of a US cargo ship by Somali pirates. The Maersk Alabama became the first US cargo ship to be hijacked in 200 years when heavily armed Somalis boarded the vessel on the 8th of April 2009. As commander of the ship, Captain Richard Phillips (Hanks) inevitably found himself at the heart of events. Held hostage by the pirates under the command of Muse (Barkhad Abdi), Phillips attempts to protect both his crew and ship to the best of his ability. However, as the drama plays out and Phillips spends more time in the company of his Somali captors, he gradually comes to realise that they have a story, too. Far from the greedy, heartless thugs of pirate lore, the Somalis may well represent the forces of globalisation as surely as the Maersk Alabama - the underside. With the stakes high, the crisis intensifies and someone will have to pay the price...

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FEBRUARY 2014 ISSUE 33

FREE www.affinitymag.co.uk

February 2014

Match Fixing

Barry Fry’s thoughts

Sphere of Love is the perfect heartfelt gift for a loved one.

The heart pendants all carry uplifting messages for any occasion, and come in stunning red packaging.

AFFINITY LUXURY LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

DUKAN DIET Kickstart 2014 with this 7 day plan

CELEBRITY MATCH Win a pair of Sorel boots as worn by the stars

YOUR VERY OWN DOWNTON ABBEY A stay at Danesfield House

BEAUTY - FOOD - DRINK - HEALTH - FITNESS - STYLE - INTERIORS - MOTORS - WHAT’S ON