NMP National Mortgage Professional August 2020

Page 70

FACEBOOK THOUGHTS

NICK ROBERSON

Nobody Wins With A Head-butt

68

Nick Roberson

Nick Roberson is a long-time mortgage industry veteran and a board member of the California Association of Mortgage Professionals. He’s a forthcoming and giving guy, who shares his…unique… perspective on work and life on his Facebook account.

Here are some of Nick’s FB thoughts this month:

Quarantine Lesson #55: Remember, your pants never get too tight if you don't wear any.

Quarantine Lesson #56: Those times with

family and friends, where something strikes everyone funny at the same time and all begin laughing so hard they can barely breathe, are far more valuable times than I ever realized. I will never take them for granted again.

Quarantine Lesson #51: Selecting Brussel

sprouts and garlic fries with lunch is not a good idea when you have to wear a face mask afterward. The carbonated beverage was a poor decision as well. I admire women with the restraint to draw on their eyebrows. I wouldn’t be able to stop until I added glasses and a moustache.

Photo courtesy of Sony Pictures

To see more by Nick, just go to www.facebook. com/nickroberson.

Quarantine Lesson #50: While cooking dinner

Quarantine Lesson #53: In these crazy times

after a long tiring day, it is unwise to set the clear plastic bottle of water you are drinking out next to a bottle of distilled white vinegar. Just take my word for it on this one.

Quarantine Lesson #52: Do not be so hungry

Quarantine Lesson #49: No matter how much you sound like Darth Vader with your face mask on, you must still carefully choose your virtual lightsaber when visiting your local Farmer's Market. It is all fun and games until someone who picks an eggplant gets a zucchini in their eye.

where handshakes, high-fives, and fist bumps are no longer acceptable social greetings, it is also important to add head-butts to that list. Because in the words of the great Paul Blart, "Nobody wins with a head-butt." for a cultural experience that you follow the sound of what you believe to be someone practicing the Didgeridoo, only to find it was simply the wind gently blowing across your neighbor, Jim's, exposed butt crack while he was weeding his lawn. People will stop asking you questions … if you answer back in interpretive dance.

| NATIONAL MORTGAGE PROFESSIONAL MAGAZINE

Quarantine Lesson #47: When I am properly motivated, my swear jar seriously outperforms my 401(k).

Quarantine Lesson #46: It is nearly impossible to lose weight in quarantine when your gym is closed, and your daughter is "Bakerina Bakesalot from Bakerstown."


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Articles inside

People On The Move

3min
pages 19-20, 22, 24-26

Nobody Wins With A Head-butt

2min
page 70

Non-QMs Opening Up Again

2min
page 67

Mortgage Fraud Hits Lowest Level In A Decade

4min
pages 59-60

Giving Back To A Vet Who Gave It All

2min
page 57

AGE IS JUST A NUMBER WHEN IT COMES TO GROWTH

4min
page 42

Six Daily Branch Supports To Succeed in Today’s Market

4min
pages 40-41

Educating Next Gen Operations

4min
pages 38-39

SILENT LEARNING: What Employees May Be Missing While Working From Home

5min
pages 36-37

Employee Onboarding In A Remote Work Environment

5min
pages 34-35

Educating Clients And Employees After The Pandemic

6min
pages 31-32

NEW TO MARKET

3min
page 28

The ABCs Of Success

3min
pages 26-27

How To Survive And Thrive In The Digital Real Estate Shift

4min
pages 24-25

What Homebuyers Want: Automated Processes And Human Help

6min
pages 22, 63-64

How To Conduct A SWOT Analysis For Your Brokerage

5min
pages 20-21

Solving The ‘Call Reluctance’ Issue

6min
pages 16-17

WHAT MORTGAGE WOMEN SAY:

2min
page 47

TIMELINE OF A SCANDAL

1min
pages 44-46, 48

COCKY AND CALCULATING

9min
pages 44-48

Laser Focus On Details To Get Clients Mortgage Ready

3min
page 15

The Keys To An Effective Training Program

3min
pages 12-13

Playing The Green

6min
pages 10-11

Agents Of Ill Advice

6min
pages 8-9

LETTER FROM THE PUBLISHER

2min
page 6
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