Don’t Drink and Go to Meetings: Why This Message Can Kill The Big Book says that “rigorous action” is required to recover from alcoholism, and this is clearly emphasized in the Steps as well. Nowhere in the book does it mention going to 90 meetings in 90 days, nor are there any statistics that indicate a benefit to doing so. You can go to 365 meetings in 200 days and still be restless, irritable, and discontent. As a recovered alcoholic and addict, I believe that the person who made up this slogan misunderstood the fundamental problem of the alcoholic—THE ALCOHOLIC LACKS THE POWER TO ADHERE TO THE SLOGAN! Let’s just look at the first three words: Do not drink. If I could not drink, I wouldn’t have a problem and therefore wouldn’t need to go to meetings.The moment the obsession hits me and I have a desire to drink, there’s nothing stopping me, especially not some bumper-sticker cliché. The only way I was able to get free was through a series of breakthroughs that brought me a spiritual awakening and that I obtained as a result of doing serious work—the steps, guided by my sponsor.
As an illustration, suppose I get a membership in a gym. I walk into the place with my shiny new sneakers, grab a protein drink, and find a guy who tells me which group of muscles to work out and on which day. So what will have I got so far? Clearly nothing, except some knowledge. And if I don’t put that knowledge into practice, it will make no sense and provide no benefit. However, the guy at the gym that does do the work will get results, and that’s what I see at the good meetings: people getting results because they’re hearing the message, taking the action, and experiencing spiritual growth. And these people, demonstrating healthy recovery, will hopefully serve as models of attraction, rather than simply cheerleading and chanting “it works if you work it” (can we please get rid of that?) and telling
the newcomer to keep coming back. And yes, of course, come back, but don’t expect to get recovery by osmosis, or you’ll wind up back at the dopeman’s or the bar, still stuck in the disease and wondering why meetings didn’t help you.
A watered-down message of recovery actually can kill. I spent years in recovery, trying to absorb the message through the fellowship, and it wasn’t enough. As a result, I overdosed seven times and wound up in a coma. I got one more shot at sobriety, and this time I did the work. Quite a few never make it back.