Equilibrium Magazine for Wellbeing/ Issue 70

ISSUE 70, 2020

MAGAZINE FOR WELLBEING

ISSUE

70 • News and Views • Joaquin Rivas: Holding on to Hope • Lesliann Jat: Creativity & Mental Health • Dev Chatterjea: Mental Health in India • Artist Profile: Jessica Rimondi • Paintings, poems and fiction

Front cover: Pixabay/ sumanley

Equilibrium Patron Dr Liz Miller Mind Champion, 2008.

What Equilibrium means to me‌.

WEB ALERTS If you know anyone who would like to be on our mailing list to get the magazine four times a year (no spam!), please email: equilibriumteam@hotmail. co.uk (www.haringey.gov.uk/ equilibrium).

Equilibrium is devised, created and produced by . students with experience of the mental health system.

Photo copyright remains with all individual artists and Equilibrium. All rights reserved, 2011.

I enjoyed writing a short article for the mental health magazine Equilibrium based on my personal experience of having a mental illness for the last 20 years. The office environment and people were all friendly and gave support on tap, especially when you got stuck for ideas or needed technical help using the computer. The other contributors present all shared a mental health history, so gelled well together, and we were made to feel very welcome.

Norman I found Equilibrium at a crucial point, where I found an open door to try a new healing form of writing and expression. Honest, happy, healthy.

One thing I have to say, I go at my own pace and learn little lessons on computers, in art and writing, communicating, and ultimately a chance to get some self-confidence and self-esteem back after being belittled and degraded and abused. I found the open light of Equilibrium at the end of a dark tunnel of life. Equilibrium gives me a purpose. Thank you.

Blessings. Richard The magazine means a lot to me for the reason that it allows me to write about various aspects of mental health and wellbeing. This is one of the only places where you can talk about this sticky matter and issues surrounding wellbeing. Working here also allows me to meet like-minded people who are passionate about talking about their experiences of their conditions. Seeing these issues being published spreads information on mental health, and other topics, even further.

Devzilla Equilibrium has been a fantastic form of expression for me. I have the choice to write about what I want and I can put my ideas into practice.

I have been with Equilibrium since 2007, and I never run out of ideas of things to write about. I have enjoyed writing articles and reviews about plays, books and galleries. The Equilibrium team has changed from time to time, but we still manage to produce four copies of the magazine a year.

Angela

EDITORIAL Dear Equilibrium readers, This editorial is being written in a climate like no other we’ve experienced. With the onset of Covid-19 we find ourselves living in extraordinarily challenging times. However, we see large sectors of the community coming together to support one another, neighbours reaching out to help the vulnerable and needy, a plethora of free online resources offered to help with our new ‘stay-at-home’ culture. Our family favourite is the Joe Wicks Workouts and free audio books offered by Audible to mention but a few! Taking care of your mental health as well as your body is essential whilst staying at home. You may feel bored, frustrated or lonely. You may also be low, worried, anxious, or concerned about your finances. Taking care of one’s mental health will be a priority over the coming months. We hope we can provide some stimulating information to help you through this. It wont last forever! Magazine disclaimer: this issue and nearly all its contents were created prior to the onset of Covid-19. Nevertheless, it is packed with useful stories and events surrounding mental health and wellbeing. Keep safe and enjoy.

Equilibrium Magazine

THE TEAM Facilitator/Editor: Anthony Parke Students: Dev, Nigel, Richard

CONTACT US Equilibrium, Clarendon Recovery College, Clarendon Road, London, N8 ODJ. 0208 489 4860, equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk.

CONTRIBUTIONS Wanted: contributions to Equilibrium! Please email us with your news, views, poems, photos and articles. Anonymity guaranteed if required.

DISCLAIMER Equilibrium is produced by students. Reproduction in whole or in part is strictly forbidden without the prior permission of the Equilibrium team. Products, articles and services advertised in this publication do not necessarily carry the endorsement of Equilibrium or any of our partners. Any material that has been reprinted is, as far as we know, in the public domain. If you have any concerns about anything printed within Equilibrium, please contact the team via the email below.

Equilibrium is published and circulated electronically four times a year to a database of subscribers; if you do not wish to receive Equilibrium or have received it by mistake, please email unsubscribe to equilibriumteam@hotmail.co.uk

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NEWS IN BRIEF Air pollution link with mental health problems Growing up in air-polluted areas is linked to mental health issues, reports The Guardian. The article explains how researchers in Denmark and the

Mind urges government to tackle 175,000 cancelled child mental health appointments

Distressing figures from mental health Mind have revealed that children with mental health issues are not

US found that people in Denmark

getting the treatment they require.

who grew up in more polluted areas

This is partly to do with the rise in

up to the age of 10 were more

demand for the services, showing

likely to develop depression, bipolar

a 25% increase compared to the

disorder, schizophrenia or personal-

previous year. This increase means

ity disorder. While US counties with

the service is struggling to cope with

worse air pollution had higher rates of bipolar disorder and depression.

However, the Guardian report says that showing a link does not mean that air pollution was the direct cause of mental health conditions in these

demands. Mind uncovered data that revealed 175,000 appointments in Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS) were cancelled by the NHS in England. The charity insist

studies. Other factors could have

that the next UK government must do

been involved they argue, such as

more to tackle the massive strain the

“living in more polluted areas, having

NHS services are under.

lower incomes, having had more

http://www.nationalhealthexecutive.com

traumatic life experiences, different drug use habits and less access to green space�. The study, the Guardian observed, did not take all of these factors into account. https://www.nhs.uk/

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Body clock disruptions linked to mood disorders

Is schizophrenia risk ‘around 80% genetic’?

Recent research, reports the Guardian,

“Genetics account for almost 80 per cent

has highlighted something that we’ve

of a person’s risk of developing schizophre-

all known to be true, which is people

nia, according to new research,” the Mail

who experience disrupted 24-hour cycles of rest and activity are more likely to have mood disorders, lower levels of happiness and greater feelings of loneliness. WHile we’ve known it to be true, researchers have proffer it to be the. They wanted to see if disruptions to the 24-hour “body clock” of rest and activity (circadian rhythm) had an impact on mental health.

They used wearable fitness-tracking

Online reports. That is the main finding of a study looking at how often schizophrenia affected both twins of a pair, looking at identical and non-identical twins.

Schizophrenia is a serious mental health condition that can cause delusions and hallucinations. There is no single “cause” of schizophrenia. It is thought to result from a complex combination of both genetic and environmental factors.

The researchers looked at twins born in Denmark and found that if one identical twin had schizophrenia, the other twin (with the same genes) was also affected

devices to assess the physical activity

in about a third of cases. For non-identical

of 90,000 people in the UK, and then

twins, who only share on average half of

compared the results with associated

their genes, this was true only in about

questionnaires looking at mood and mental health outcomes. They found that people who were less active in the daytime and more active at night were more likely to have depression and bipolar disorder, less likely to describe

7% of cases. Based on these figures, the researchers calculated that 79% of the risk of developing schizophrenia was down to their genes.

While the findings suggest genes do play an important role in schizophrenia, this is only an estimate and the true picture is likely to be more complicated. Environmen-

themselves as happy, and more likely

tal factors clearly still have an influence

to say they were often lonely.

on whether the person actually develops schizophrenia.

https://www.nhs.uk/news/mental-health/body clock-disruptions-linked-mood-disorders/

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https://www.nhs.uk/news/mental-health/schizopenia-risk-around-80-genetic/

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Arts & Creativity Lesliann Jat

As Samuel Johnson said, ‘the only

Dickens, Shakespeare. “Not me!” you

end of writing’ – and it is as true of the

think to yourself, “I’m ordinary.” To

other arts as of literature – ‘is to enable

my surprise, in researching this article,

the reader better to enjoy life, or

“ordinary creativity” is the subject

better to endure it’”, from the Creative

of much psychological research. In

Health Inquiry Report.

Psychology Today, ordinary creativity

is discussed as a positive quality of

There is something to be said

for doing whatever takes you out

which we are all capable: “’We’ve

of your “head”, even out of your

become narrow in the way we think

“self” – without using mind-altering

about creativity,’” observes Teresa

substances! Something to be said

Amabile, a psychologist at Brandeis

about the experience of “flowing”,

University. “’We tend to think of it as

“focus”, “peace”, “letting go”. I’ve

rarefied . . . but the cook in her kitchen

heard all of these phrases, and

is showing creativity when she invents

used some myself, to describe what

a variation on a recipe.’” Decorating

happens when you get CREATIVE.

a room, knitting, arranging flowers in

The word “creative” can put you

a vase, writing a thoughtful note to a

off. It can seem daunting. You may

friend, planting a garden, these can

conjure up some great artists: Stormzy,

all be creative activities. Problem-

Beyonce, Beethoven, Renoir, Picasso,

solving of all kinds. New ways to do

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small things. Playing with children. All

kinds of inspired moments.

ourselves as creative. But are we

limiting ourselves with this narrow

Further in the same Psychology

Many of us don’t think of

Today article, Dr. Michele Root-

view? Are we preventing ourselves

Bernstein, co-author with Robert Root-

from appreciating our own potential?

Bernstein of Sparks of Genius says,

Is this simply a mindset? Can

“’It’s too bad that when considering

recognising our own creativity have

what endeavours may be creative,

a positive impact on our mental

people immediately think of the arts.

health? And what of the Arts?

It’s the problem-solving processes

Psychologists suggest that recognising

they exhibit rather than the content

our existing creativity and nurturing

or craft that make them so. Just

our creative impulses does have

about anything we do can be

a positive impact on our mental

addressed in a creative manner, from

health. Self-help books, such as The

housecleaning to personal hobbies to

Artist’s Way, have long expounded

work.”

this idea. Mental Health Services

have long encouraged participation

Creativity has been described

by high-performing athletes, as

in more traditional arts and crafts

the “white moment”, or “being in

and of course the use of arts-based

the zone”, or what psychologists

interventions, like music therapy or

call, “flow”. This is a moment

art therapy, as beneficial to mental

when your skills and the challenge

health. However, it is only in recent

before you seem to click into place

years that central government has

effortlessly. Times stands still or moves

started to show signs that they too

very quickly, you are oblivious to

recognise that provision of these kinds

distractions.

of services might be money well-spent.

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In 2017, the All-Party

measurable effect on mental health.

Parliamentary Group on Arts, Health

One of the successful projects cited

and Wellbeing published a report

by the parliamentary inquiry is Arts

entitled, “Creative Health: The Arts

and Minds, a Cambridgeshire-based

for Health & Well-being”. Now before

Arts on Prescription project which has

I go any further, take a moment to

had outstanding, measured, results.

consider the title of this cross-party

Measurement of whether, or not, a

grouping of MPs and designated experts. Since when has central government been thinking about arts and wellbeing? Do education budgets for primary schools usually include money for specialist art teachers? Or music teachers?

(Just two possible examples of provision.) If the arts, as this report shows, have such a good impact on overall health, and mental health in particular, then shouldn’t we be fostering its promotion from an

project has beneficial outcomes for participants is an important factor in the government world of budgets and cuts to budgets. Arts and Minds runs weekly art workshops for people experiencing depression, stress or anxiety. The workshops offer people a chance to try out many different kind of making, including printmaking and sculpture.

Interestingly, the report also

cites the positive effect on health of

early age? Just saying! But back

simply attending a cultural event.

to the subject at hand. This report

So, maybe you just go to a concert

gathers evidence and concludes

or attend a neighbourhood festival.

that creativity generally, and the

In other words, you do not have to

arts specifically, have a significant

become Picasso, you can just look at

positive, transformational and

his paintings!

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NEWS IN BRIEF NHS spending £2.5m a week treating mental health patients out of

Personal health budgets to be given to 100,000 more patients

area The government have announced The NHS is spending an estimated

a change in law that means 100,000

£2.5m every week providing out of

more people are to be given

area treatment for mental health

personal health budgets. People

patients. The figures show that in

who use wheelchairs or need

the last twelve months, the NHS

mental health support will have

has spent £128m on patients, with

more choice and control over their

some being forced to travel over

own health and care. Individuals

300km and several hours from their

who are eligible for an NHS wheel-

home for a bed. These shortages

chair and those who require after-

occur due to a lack of hospital beds

care services under section 117 of

locally, with the number of out of

the Mental Health Act will have

area placements due to bed short-

their own personal health budget.

ages rising by four per cent from last year. Up to 8,400 such placements were recorded across England.

Of those recorded, 2,060 lasted between one and three months.

A further 310 lasted over 91 nights.

Over 3,000 of these placements

In order to give the individuals more of a say into their health and care support, a planned health budget, personalised to the patient, will be agreed between themselves and clinicians. http://www.nationalhealthexecutive.com

took place 100km or more from patients’ homes. http://www.nationalhealthexecutive.com

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Holding on to Hope Joaquin Rivas

W

hat does hope mean to you?

Hope for world peace, hope

us human and we can all have a

Hope is part of what makes

to win the lottery, hope to get that

conversation on what hope means

political change at the ballot box that

to each one of us and give very

always seem to allude us at every

different answers. It may mean

election, are some examples. Hope can

different things to different people.

also be more deeply personal borne

Look in the dictionary and you may

out of difficult circumstances. Such as,

find that hope is defined as a desire of

hope for my cancer to go away, hope

expectation and fulfilment. It is part of

to pay the bills this month. Or a religious

our everyday thinking without us being

hope where it is seen as a confident

necessarily aware. Metaphorically, it

expectation rather than wishful thinking. may also be an optimistic flight out of

A child’s hope may be integrated

that glum place you may be in into

and visualised during play, where he or

an expectation of greener sunnier

she hopes to be that actor or a football

pastures.

player. They then act out the pretence

and have that moment of happiness

the 75th anniversary of Auschwitz. At

whilst doing so.

the time the first thought that came to

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I was asked to write this article on

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me was what type of hope, if any, did

“I hope I can give up smoking”.

those survivors have while they were

interned and is hope what kept the

by reminding us that our planet is

fragile thread of their life from giving

precious and the changes we are

way? We may not know the odds but

making to the Earth should not be

we hope to achieve the expectation,

underestimated. “Halting dangerous

even to the point where all that is left is

climate change is achievable”. He

the hope to survive and live.

underlines the point by reminding us

MP, Hilary Benn grounds us

of that iconic photograph taken by In the linked article 16 writers and

Apollo astronauts. “Our Earth in all

thinkers give a view on what gives

its splendour floating in the eternity

hope in dark times. I have given some

of space. At that moment, we really

brief extracts from 6 that stood out

understood what our interdependence

for me. However, I suggest you read

means”.

through the article yourself as there

will be some viewpoints that may

gives a contrasting view with a rather

undoubtedly resonate more personally

jolly twist on the subject of global

to you.

warming. “If the planet doesn’t melt, I

can redo my kitchen.” Interestingly he

Crystal Rasmussen who wrote

Ed Gamble is a comedian and

Diary of a Drag Queen hopes we can

also mentions how his audiences react

all be kinder to each other and also

to his performances, “you can never

says, “I hope in the next decade that

truly know what an audience will be

we see the NHS restored, nourished,

like (unless you are in Maidenhead,

and valued.” In contrast Crystal

where they stare). You can only hope.”

mentions something which was very

real to me and finally managed to do,

Taking Up Space: The Black Girl’s

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Ore Ogunbiyi is co-author of

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Manifesto for Change, reminds us of

will be here soon. I hope my dog does

the under representation of black

not take any more tennis balls from

women in the social landscape and hopes to see more black women at the top.

An interesting and focused

viewpoint is raised by Luciana Berger,

other dogs in the park. I already have more tennis balls at home than there are in a match at centre court. I hope my son gets his A levels. I hope my

former MP. “Pretty much everything

children will be happy in the future. In

good in our world has been made

fact, I could go on and on. The more

by optimists, from the NHS to electric

I think of it the more I realise hope

cars. And pessimists have always

encompasses many of my desires

been there to drag us down”. She also mentions we can shape our destinies and hopes children will inherit a better

quote from the Dalai Lama XIV makes a lot of sense to me, “no matter

world.

and thoughts throughout the day. This

Brexit of course had to be

what sort of difficulties, how painful

mentioned here at some point.

experience is, if we lose our hope,

Which leads me to Journalist

that’s our real disaster”.

Carole Cadwalladr who says she is

“despairing much of the time,” and adds, “the referendum was corrupt.”

She however hopes, “the truth of matters will turn out.”

Personally, for me, hope is for a

We never really know what

tomorrow will bring, it is beyond our touch. A type of blindness and confinement until it comes into view.

We fill the empty canvas with our

better tomorrow. I hope people will

expectations and hope reality will

be nicer for each other. I hope spring

match what we expect.

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Arts - Jessica Rimondi Anthony J. Parke

Looking at the work of Jessica Rimondi

the rawness of there rendering.

one is immediately confronted by

There is a sense of an obliteration of

apparitions of an intense visceral

the portrait, and with that a certain

nature. These ‘portraits’ are designed

sense of quasi-violence in the air. There

to extract a certain emotional or

is something taking place in a temporal

psychological response from the viewer.

sense. A nowness imbued in them.

There is little bystanding to be done.

Perhaps an unfolding of an event.

They demand the viewer be involved.

Almost certainly, this is a psychological

One could say there is something of the

event. The fragmentations of the sitters’

Francis Bacon about them, certainly in

features leave one feeling uneasy. Art

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can be many things, and a sense of dis-

about them. I think of the oft-told tale

ease is a very viable form of expression

of William Burroughs performing the

to elicit from a viewer.

William Tell act on his wife. A bottle on

her head for him to shoot with his rifle.

The muted background palette

renders not only something akin to the

Except that he misses and shoots her

classical grisaille underpainting, but also

in the head. There is something of the

of the deadened hues of a prostate

explosive head, designed to elicit a

cadaver. But unlike the incomplete

psychological response.

grisaille, these are very much complete

and assured works. They are robust

to create such paintings? Slow and

paintings with a provocative strength

genteel? Or vigorous and explosive?

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How would one expect a painter

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Possibly even attacked? The textural

made all the more intense by the

rendering gives the clues. They were

absence of ours. For there is nowhere

created with emotion, and elicit

for the viewer to escape, no

emotion.

cupboards, tables, gardens, skies, or

swimming pools. You can turn away,

These paintings are created

with an assured hand. They are

or connect.

bold and potent. Completely

decontextualised from any

inescapable ‘attraction’. Why?

recognizable environment, they

Because we are witnessing real

make their own worlds which is

people. Fragmented, yes, but all

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These paintings have an

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the more real for the fragmentation.

effect us all. They are not calm or

This is because this fragmentation

still. Every mark, slash, scrape tells its

reveals a truer picture of our human

own psychological tale. They appear

nature, far moreso than the mere

bloodied, bruised, and battered.

approximation/ inclusion of features.

But that is the surface reading only.

Less is more, shall we say.

These surface physicalities are merely

the portals into which we discuss

An abstract rendering creates

a complex psychological focus.

their humanity. To stand before one

Who are these sitters? If there is a

of these paintings is to stand before

psychological struggle, what is it?

the very existential nature of our lives.

Note, the psychological condition

Who are we, and how do we exist

under scrutiny is not a localised one.

in this world, is the question these

It is a universal one. These reflect the

paintings provoke.

psychological encounters which

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Pixabay/Darshak12Pandya

Mental Health stigma India Dev Chatterjea

T

his subject is a very sticky subject in

it has not been made public. Health

the country. Especially in a country

statistics in India states that 150 million

that houses nearly a quarter of human

people have mental illness in the

population. In short it is hardly spoken

country.

of, or kept secret as people say. This is

mainly due to pride, ego and a lack or

say the least. Any services that are

unwanted interest in the stigma riddled

available are way to expensive or hard

subject. So you could say people with

to find. If there is a services its hardly

mental health issues keep it tight lipped.

known of secretive. Here comes the

Unlike the UK where this subject has

infamous ego trip thought, to know a

been brought in to the media, here

place that deals with mental illness

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Support services are scarce to

Summer/ Issue 38

maybe seen as “bad” for the ego

the person may be led to feel like a

in a social sense. This is one of many

fool or an idiot. Now the “immediate

factors why mental health services

family” only starts to find support for

and support is not known ofin India.

him secretly - in the fear of getting

Huffington Post India states that while 150 million people are in dire need of mental health intervention but only 30 million people actually get care. Sometimes people would use mental health problems as a way of avoiding trouble. They would be

even more ostracised! So much for family support. I must stress this is not the case in all Indian families. In some families people are more accepting and help that specific family member.

But this maybe an exception.

deemed to be unfit. And this could

go on for a long while. This is clearly

Word Health Organization in 2015

ignoring a very serious illness. However

had showed that one in five Indians

this is common in India.

may suffer from depression in their

lifetime that is the equivalent to 200

Let me give the reader a

scenario: let’s say a young man has a mental health condition which suddenly lairs up. He starts to act out at home, in front of family (extended family). The family starts step back.

They start to gossip amongst themselves, ultimately leading family to ostracise the individual instead

A study conducted by the

million people. Even though this was done 5 years ago, these statistics wouldn’t have substantially changed that much today. There continues to be a massive stigma associated with mental illness in the country. Due to a lack of awareness, and the limited

of helping them. The immediate

access to professional help, only 10-

family are also to a lesser extent

12% of these sufferers will seek help.

kept at a distance. In some instances

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Photos by Taran Parke-Antonis Skipton Woods, Yorshire

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Breakfast in his Den Polly Granger

Y

ou can choose your friends, but you

life is planned and controlled.

can’t choose your family.

It’s quite a cruel thing to say, I

Back to our breakfast. I pour

precisely 127g of low-fat Greek

suppose, particularly when you know

yoghurt over 59g of shattered

what I’m alluding to.

walnuts. Prime numbers are special,

phantasmagorical. He also insists on

Funnily enough, it’s because

of my family that I don’t have many

a ramekin of fruit salad, which must

friends. I don’t have many family

comprise of peeled green grapes,

members, either. Just the one that I am

diced dragon fruit, a deseeded Cripps

actually in contact with.

Pink apple and chopped strawberries.

British, naturally. And if I can’t buy them

I wake up to an alarm, usually set

for half six in the morning. Some may

in the shops, I have to drive twenty miles

consider this early start odd, as I work

to our nearest farm to beg them for a

from home, but this is usually before

punnet of the bitter strawberries they

they find out what my job is, what the

can’t sell at the market. It used to be

slightly unusual intricacies of my day

very embarrassing, but now they know

involve, what he expects from me.

me and the reason for these odd visits.

They understand. I’ve been going every

We always breakfast together,

so I shower, dress and go to the kitchen

autumn for fifteen years.

to prepare his very pernickety morning

meal. This never changes, and if it ever

and fruit salad, I climb the stairs to his

sways from his specifications, he’ll either

den. It has the semblance of a study,

ask me to prepare a new breakfast,

with a broad mahogany desk and

or he’ll starve himself until I bring his

three-legged stool (three being a prime

lunch at exactly 12.45pm. If lunch is

number). The stool doesn’t complement

any later than that, he won’t eat until

the opulence of the beautiful desk; it is

dinner. This absence of sustenance

old, the rough plastic seat stained with

will always result in anger, irrational

a variety of dark drinks that have spilt

cognition, aggression, hatred. There are

from a quivering hand. But, like many

a plethora of other annoyances that

things in his life, it would not feel ‘right’

cause these tantrums; everything in his

to change it. Although only an object,

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Once I’ve prepared his yoghurt

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an inconsequential, dirty object, it is

immediately. Although he never

an integral part of his routine.

leaves his den, he loathes the idea of

mess in other rooms of the house.

The reason I don’t call this

room a study is because it also has

a single bed over by the back wall.

and he opens Word. We wait ten

This den is large enough for a double

minutes because he likes to start at

bed, but he has refused to upgrade

exactly 8am.

to this more mature option. Like the

stool, the bed is lucky. One of its

working on yesterday: ‘Golfing

four wheels has come off, but he

and Giraffes’, chapter four of his

has never bothered to remedy this,

novel, the title of which illustrates

despite the irritating tilt that plagues

his partiality for alliteration. I move

him whenever he turns over.

my chair over to his side and start to

read the prose. It is the third time I’m

He is sitting at the desk now, the

When I return, I log in for him,

He opens the file we were

computer screen on, ready for me

reading this paragraph. He sits with

to log in for him. I have to be present

his blond head bowed, his sombre

whenever he enters any passwords.

blue eyes trained on his lap, waiting

He’s frightened that he’ll send them

for me to point out any errors he may

to someone in a moment of lunacy,

have made, any sentences that are

and then he’ll be hacked, robbed,

reminiscent of things I have read over

humiliated.

the course of my thirty-year life.

I smile at him, place his

“I don’t want them to think I’ve

breakfast on the desk, and then take

plagiarised anything. You can never

my usual seat in the chair between

be too careful.”

his desk and bed. He begins to eat.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t have any

the same passage this afternoon,

mealtime rituals. It is perhaps one of

perhaps again tomorrow.

the few reprieves he gets from his

compulsions. We do not speak.

same novel for fifteen years after all.

But isn’t that the sacrifice you make

Once he’s finished, I take

the tray downstairs and wash up

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

I knew I would have to read

We had been working on the

for family?

EQUILIBRIUM 27

Andrew Howard Poems 1)

2)

Beginning.

This palace of extraordinary change,

The broken journey.

King of islands,

Eternity takes a rest

Milk and honey to the mind,

As life pulls me

Sea walled Eden,

Through it’s eye.

Seasoned and mature in autumn gold.

A celebration of the year,

War in Yugoslavia.

A feast,

A bucolic scene,

For England.

Criss crossed With tracer bullet fire,

3)

Snapping from woodland,

I woke,

Bouncing off farm building walls.

And found myself Strapped tight

An appeal for violence to cease.

To a white marble table,

In the dark we slave,

Part of rows and rows,

But you look like light.

With others similarly imprisoned.

Let there be light.

Screams of pain or horror Surrounded the temple.

Glastonbury.

“Right, lets get started”

Night fires and the clear sky

Said the devil, smiling.

Were magical, As if sparks

4)

Created the stars.

Earth factory.

And in the morning

Advert: GMO tailored to your planetary

The yellow sun’s nuclear eye

conditions. Exports local and interstellar.

Mixed with blue air

Only the rich now live on earth. Only the rich

To make leaves of green.

can afford robots to deal with material issues

And there as the sun rose

such as food, sanitation and healthcare, and

The devil confessed to me.

most importantly, security.

“I had to do it”, he said,

Poor people live on other planets, both in

Sadness in his eyes.

this and in other solar systems.

EQUILIBRIUM EQUILIBRIUM 28

Summer/ Issue 38

War has been eradicated, but only by the triumph of the elite controlling the masses. Peace is worse than war.

Life is miserable for people on mars. It is dirty, dangerous, claustrophobic and deadly, mainly from cancers. The fine Martian soil is like red photocopier toner, and gets everywhere.

Yet earth factory products have been creative in bringing life to the dry, cold planet. Horse bushes thrive, as do GM bees. Mosses green the red planet. The first baby was born there in 2241 AD, in the King Trump hospital in Eden district, as the small pod near knife creek was grandly named.

5) Good Friday.

Noises by the Wolfe statue.

Birds chirple over the hazy scene.

Fire engines scream.

A distant dog Walks down the path.

Columns of canary warf Plot the air.

I’m having a good good Friday.

We’ve come a long way Since it was ok To nail a bloke to a bit of wood.

I sit on a flakey green painted bench, And creatures pass by; A man with headphones on, A crow, a pigeon, a fly.

We live, we age, we die.

www.haringey.gov.uk/equilibrium

EQUILIBRIUM 29