2010 Families of the Year
November & December, 2010
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November & December, 2010
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APPLE FamilyWorks
Families of the Year Gala
Worried About Spoiling Your Kids During the Holidays?
18 The Hand
By Richard Bromfield, Ph.D.
Affirmation for a Peaceful Holiday
A Story of Giving Thanks
By Steve Goodlier
By Mary Jane DeWolf-Smith MA, RN, MFT
APPLE FamilyWorks 11 Parenting Programs 12 Counseling Programs 13 Family Interactive Therapy 14 Support for Individuals
19 Kids with Special Needs
and the Role of Early Childhood Educators
By Gary Direnfeld, LCSW
20 School Spotlight:
The Mountain School
15 Making Friends
Without Facebook
By Russ Hadle
22 2010 School
Directory
16 Bye, Bye Sweety
By Kimberley Clayton Blaine
FamilyWorks Magazine is published by APPLE FamilyWorks® Executive Director: Mary Jane DeWolf-Smith Editor:
Lew Tremaine
Marketing:
Doug Silberstein
Art Director/Website:
Christine M. Astin
Web Publisher:
Art Severe
Printed by:
S.F. Offset
FamilyWorks® Board of Directors: Anjana Berde, President Paul Ricken, Vice President Mark Clark, Secretary Maria Villani, Treasurer Vicky Smirnoff Amy Whitelaw
APPLE FamilyWorks® 4 Joseph Court, San Rafael, CA 94903 email: familynews@familyworks.org Read FamilyWorks Magazine on-line at www.familyworks.org
Sponsorship Information: Doug Silberstein Phone: (415) 492-1022 FAX: (415) 492-1099 email: community@familyworks.org
This seal of approval is a service mark of Independent Charities of America and is used under license. Content is the responsibility of FamilyWorks.
awarded to
Editorial Information: Lew Tremaine Phone: (415) 492-0720 x231 FAX: (415) 492-1099 email: familynews@familyworks.org
Circulation: This major family magazine is published bi-monthly and widely distributed FREE throughout Marin and Sonoma Counties: through home deliveries, distribution to over 200 community locations - stores, public and private schools, medical offices, hospitals, and family-related businesses – and direct mail to thousands of active participants and sponsors of FamilyWorks®. © 2010 APPLE FamilyWorks®, All rights reserved. APPLE FamilyWorks is a nonprofit agency serving families in the Bay Area. No portion of FamilyWorks Magazine may be reproduced without written permission of the publisher. Appearance of articles, editorials, author’s point of view, advertisements or announcements for products and services in FamilyWorks Magazine does not necessarily constitute an endorsement by FamilyWorks® and FamilyWorks® is not responsible for its content or the reactions of readers to its content. FamilyWorks Magazine reserves the right to refuse advertising for any reason. Unsolicited manuscripts and photographs are welcome and should e-mailed to: familynews@familyworks.org
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November & December, 2010
Worried About Spoiling Your Kids During the Holidays? The winter holidays bring out a lot of good in people. It also brings out a lot of other things, like stress, desperation, and pocketbooks. Today’s parents are especially prone to showing their love for their children with a bonanza of presents that goes on and on. At best, they buy a lot of things that they can well afford but that their children don’t really need -- and at its bleakest? Just read the business section to see the latest figures for personal debt and bankruptcy.
By Richard Bromfield, Ph.D.
What can a parent do when the holiday spirit grabs him/her and just won’t let go?
Hold Onto Your Budget
If you’re in debt, don’t let this last week of Christmas shopping dig your hole even deeper. There’s no good reason to let holiday gift-giving do you financial harm.
Remember Your Priorities
Remind yourself of the other things you need money for, maybe night school, or a bathroom remodeling, or just to keep up a small rainy day account for emergencies. Beware that the rush of the final shopping week doesn’t set you back or utterly derail your saving for things that matter more in your life and your family’s.
Hang Tough
When the enthusiasm and fatigue of holiday shopping get to you, it is all too easy to buy a little or a lot more. Stay mentally tough and keep asking yourself, “Do the children really need this? Will they really use this? Is it really worth all that money? Haven’t I already bought enough?” Think Quality Not Quantity
How many gifts do children need to feel loved or remembered on the holidays? Probably far fewer than they will get. For example, stocking stuffers used to mean little curiosa and candies to decorate the mantel the night before Christmas. You know something is wrong when you can’t
November & December, 2010
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fit your stuffers in the stocking or when you need a credit card to pay for them. Are $59 videogames really what stocking stuffers are all about? Resist that nagging doubt to keep buying one more thing. Look in the Parenting Mirror
Children who are over-indulged on the holidays are often the same children who are overindulged the rest of the year. There’s no better time to readjust your parenting and get some good unspoiling going than during the holidays. No child ever suffered from having a reasonable season of gifts. Getting too much, on the other hand, can spoil.
Children who are over-ndulged on the holidays are often the same children who are overindulged the rest of the year. There’s no better time to readjust your parenting and get some good un-spoiling going than during the holidays. No child ever suffered from having a reasonable season of gifts. Getting too much, on the other hand, can spoil.
Keep the Spirit Away From Your Wallet
Watch that nostalgia for the holidays of your childhood doesn’t open your pocketbook as much as your heart. The holidays have limited religious meaning. Corporate forces have singlehandedly turned them into industries.
Teach the True Meaning of Giving
give yourself a little gift from me maybe some holiday sanity? Richard Bromfield, Ph.D., psychologist, reveals strategies that have worked for other parents, creating a method of un-spoiling that’s simple, straightforward, and doable. A faculty member of Harvard Medical School, he is in private practice in Boston, Massachusetts.
Our children tend to have learned all too well how to get and take. Engage your child in Family holiday baking for neighbors, helping to gather and deliver clothing and food for shelters, inviting them to help you shoulderto-shoulder do for others.
The holidays can sweep us all up and lead us to buy and give too much, especially in the whirlwind of the last week. For all of their wonder and joy, however, they are just days. Resist. See the holidays for what they are and what you, in your heart, would like them to be. Use this last week to reflect. Remind yourself of the true lessons and meanings you’d like your children to receive. Above all, holidays are a golden opportunity for you to personally transform, to move closer to the ways you want to live and parent. Oh, and don’t forget to
Dental Care
John T. Smith, DDS 915 Sir Francis Drake Blvd., San Anselmo (Across from Red Hill Shopping Center)
415-453-1666
Parade of Lights inter onderland
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Saturday November 27th
Free Snow Sledding & Kids Activities continue!
9am - until the snow melts!
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November & December, 2010
I am Peaceful and Centered
Often, the information we have stored in our brains predicts negative outcomes and is discouraging. We can however, store and access positive, self-affirming information by making positive statements out loud. (When we state affirmations outloud our brain “hears” them and records them as fact.) Just follow these simple instructions: Sit in a quite peaceful place where you can relax and be comfortable. Decrease distractions. Put on some soft, pleasing music. Read the affirmations out loud calmly and slowly. When you finish reading the last line: 1. Close your eyes and then open them saying: “ I am peaceful and centered”. 2. Then say, “Whenever I close my eyes and open them again I feel completely peaceful and centered.” 3. Now, open and close your eyes again and notice the peaceful-ness in your body and the comfortable core of your being. During the day when you notice your body tensing or mind racing, take a few deep breaths, opening your eyes wide when you inhale and then as you close your eyes, relaxing as you exhale. Over time you will learn to drop into a peaceful and centered place when you open and close your eyes AND still stay alert and able to move comfortably through your day.
My lungs fill with renewed energy. My eyes sparkle with clarity. I meet the new day with calm anticipation. I welcome challenges and change. I am peaceful and centered I I I I I
feel protected and safe. feel joyful and playful. am filled with hope. feel at home in the world. am peaceful and centered.
I I I I I
absorb what I read and hear. am understood when I speak. am accepted and appreciated. feel gentle and loving. am peaceful and centered.
I see all people as fellow travelers. I respect and honor my feelings. I respect and honor other people’s feelings. I join others at their comfort level. I am peaceful and centered. I I I I I
see exciting possibilities. have all the energy I need. laugh and play with ease. rest and sleep with ease. am peaceful and centered.
I am safe and serene. I feel energized and alive. I am filled with thanksgiving and abundance. I feel at home in the world. I am peaceful and centered.
by Mary Jane DeWolf-Smith, RN, PHN, MA, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist November & December, 2010
My body is relaxed and comfortable. My shoulders are soft and supple. My jaw is loose. My eyes are rested I am peaceful and centered.
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Families of the Year Honorees
Big Br other J oh The R iviore n Turnacliff and Family
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Marin Y and Th Youth Cour t’s e Roth -Fenne Don Carne y ll Fam ily
Maria A Explor rteaga and L ando la Ma eticia Jime ternid ad Jun nez of the tas Pro gram www.familyworks.org
November & December, 2010
and Smith . r e f i n Jen ger rector n Heffelfin i D e v ea uti ber D Y Exec Marin Board mem Y Marin
Apple F And F amilyWork amily s Boar Fr d Leslie Ruhla iendly Busin President A nd of Accuc ess of the Y njana Berde ear Ho hex noree
APPLE F and K amilyWork atie Sm s Big Br ithers Board Secr s etary o a e nd E t i h t i e l rs/Big bi Sisters dward Kau Mark Clark l Disa Lisa a t n e fman o d m f the N n E.D. o evelop rnsbarger a o D r t f h s k Bay. r Wo rine A al Center y l e i h t m a a K F n r o o E i t L g APP rdina n Gate Re m Coo e Progra of the Gold e n e Ros
APPLE FamilyWorks Board Treasurer Maria Villani, Jean Maki and Susan Wiebers of Marin Community Clinic, Maria Arteaga and Exploring Motherhood Together Facilitator Tonia Sassi. November & December, 2010
www.familyworks.org
finger Heffel r Vicky n a e embe ling, D y Dow rks Board M r a M o nd Oak a LE FamilyW P P A and off. Smirn
eutic herap ee. T f o r emc irecto orks D of the Year W y l i m Fa ilies APPLE s and Fam m a r Prog ders. a Saun Patrici
APPLE F (botto amilyWork m) An s Boar ja d Villan i, (top na Berde, V of Director ) Paul s i Ricken cky Smirno ff and and M Maria ark Cl ark.
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APPLE FamilyWorks Volunteers Wanda McBade and Elaine Holmes and APPLE FamilyWorks Operations Manager Diana Wilkins www.familyworks.org
November & December, 2010
Many Thanks to Families of the Year Sponsors - Benefactors -
• Marin Sanitary Service • Marinscope Community Newspapers • John T. Smith, D.D.S. - Leaders-
• Anna Chandler Photography • Good Earth Natural and Organic Foods • Luther Burbank Savings • Marintellect Consulting • Summit State Bank • Westamerica Bank • Union Bank - Patrons -
• Bank of Marin Community Fund • Montecito Plaza • PMB+Helin Donovan 10 November & December, 2010
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Therapy and Life Skills Center Parenting Programs Child-Centered Co-Parenting
Positive
& Peaceful
Parenting
Parents who are living apart learn how to raise their children harmoniously, keep children “out of the middle” and safely in each of their lives. Parents attend separate classes and learn to:
Learn Keys to Increasing: • Cooperation • Self-esteem • Responsibilty • Communication • Respect • Discipline
Exploring Free! Motherhood For Expectant & New Mothers (and infants birth to 9 months). Spanish speaking group: Tuesdays, 10 a.m. to noon and English speaking goup Fridays from 10 a.m. until noon at Marin Community Clinic in Novato. Spanish speaking group Thursdays 10 AM to Noon at Marin Community Clinic in San Rafael. • Share experiences, ideas, and support • Learn about pregnancy and new parenthood • Learn how to increase infant health & happiness • Learn ways to manage change and decrease stress • Reduce anxiety and depression
• Deal with each other respectfully
Viewing Life Today • Being a Proactive Parent • Identifying Your Universal Principles
• Increase cooperation • Make co-parenting decisions calmly
Growing Great Kids • Understanding How Kids Work • Ensuring Goodness of Fit • Making Work Fun Listening and Talking • Listening Effectively • Decreasing Impulsive Behavior Problem Solving that Gets Results • Using the Magical “When...Then” • Designing Charts that Get Results • Revamping “Time Out” Feeling More Confident • Being Positive and Persistent • Sharing Successes • Setting Positive Consequences
• Divide child-rearing tasks equitably • Manage constantly shifting schedules • Stop tantrums and dawdling • Design consequences that work • End rudeness & backtalk Seven Tuesday evenings: Jan. 11 - Feb. 22, 2011 Earn a certificate of completion at graduation.
Four Tuesday evenings: Jan. 11 - Feb. 1, 2011 Earn a certificate of completion at graduation.
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415-492-0720 November & December, 2010
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Therapy and Life Skills Center Therapy Programs Therapy with Children With a wide variety of child-centered expressive arts, includingspecialized sand-tray materials, children bring their thoughts and emotions to the surface allowing the child to build self-esteem and enhance emotional regulation.
Individual Family Therapy and Couples Counseling Concerns, hopes and dreams, as well as practical and effective relationship tools are explored. The result is increased understanding and empathy, more cooperation and more fun in family life through: • Managing Child Behavior • Resolving Hurts and Conflicts • Dealing with Anxiety, Depression and Addictions • Sharing Child Rearing • Planning for Play • Managing Anger • Creating Cooperative Responsible Children
Therapy with Teens FamilyWorks’ skilled therapists work with adolescents to support their journey to adulthood. Using various forms of expressive arts therapy, interactive play/exercises and outdoor activities, teens find new ways to resolve problems, build greater self-esteem and enhance their social skills in ways that support their healthy growth and development.
Utilizing a variety of theoretical approaches, FamilyWorks’ therapists help individuals to develop healthy life skills and increase their social-emotional well being. We are skilled in helping with a broad range of relationship and psychological issues, including: • Life Stage Transitions • Anxiety • Abuse • Depression • Anger & Conflict • Improved Self-Esteem • Grief & Loss • Stress
Assessment
Using temperament profiles and developmental assessments, parents and children will learn positive skills and design behavior plans that maximize each child’s potential. Therapists consult with teachers and parents, developing behavioral interventions that work at home, play and school. Therapists are available to make home-visits, school observations and attend IEP meetings. Mental health screenings for anxiety, depression, AD/HD, etc. are available. Adjustable Fees
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415-492-0720
Therapy and Life Skills Center Family Interactive Therapy
F. I.T Services: When Family members want to improve communication and learn problem solving skills, Family Interactive Therapy at FamilyWorks, offers a unique program. Initially the parents share concerns with their therapist, followed by an opportunity for the entire family to set and meet their goals. Then, individual family members may be interviewed. An action plan is designed to meet the needs of each individual and the entire family.
Family Meeting
Individual Counseling Families may choose to benefit from the one way mirror option, in which child development assessments are made and family members can practice the skills they are learning with the assistance of a FamilyWorks Therapist. Parents may receive guidance through an ear bud as the therapist observes interactions through the one-way mirror.
One-way Mirror Option
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415-492-0720 November & December, 2010
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Therapy and Life Skills Center Support for Individuals with Developmental Disabilities Parenting Support Services • Parenting and Co-Parenting • Childbirth Education • Child Development and Family Planning • Behavior Management and Stress Reduction • Early Intervention in Postpartum Depression • Positive and Peaceful Discipline
• Injury Prevention, Nutrition, and Exercise • Household Management, and Transportation • Financial Management and Budgeting • Development of Social Support Systems • Linkage with Others Services
• Family Health Promotion and Hygiene
Independent Living Skills • Academic Growth
• Hygiene and Self-care
• Behavior Management
• Housekeeping
• Stress Reduction Skills
• Transportation Skills
• Injury Prevention
• Community Access
• Nutrition
• Employment Readiness
• Health Promotion and Exercise
• Financial Management and Budgeting
• Development of Social Support Systems
CPR & First Aid Classes CPR - 9:30 AM to 1:00 PM First Aid - 1:15 to 4 PM
Learn infant, child and adult choke-saving and CPR and how to apply these skills in emergencies. You will have
www.familyworks.org 14 November & December, 2010
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hands-on practice, receive a CPR skill book and a National Safety Council Certification upon completion.
415-492-0720
Friendships Outside of Cyberspace Share
By Russ Handler “It’s ironic to me how the existence of all these different communication technologies has actually managed to make us feel more distant from each other,” says author Marilyn Randall. “We all have multiple email addresses, online profiles and cell phones, but somehow
we feel more far apart than ever before. Maybe what we need to do is teach our kids to put the computer down, and go outside and play with their friends.” Randall’s tips for parents who want to help their kids better value their friendships include:
Limit Internet Use
Balance Cyberspace with Real Life If your kids use social networks, make sure they actually get together with their online friends once a week to do something. Take the time to make your home available, even if their friends simply come over to share a pizza. Help your kids balance cyberspace with the real world. Parents like this.
A generation ago, parents would limit the amount of television they would allow their kids to watch, and monitor what they watched. Place time limits on the time your kids spend online in the same way, and monitor which sites they use to chat with their friends. Parents like this.
Marilyn Randall has authored a series of children’s books on friendships including For Faithful Friends, The Best of Best Friends, and Share From the Heart www.marilynrandall.com.
Set An Example Show your kids how you interact with your friends, and show them the value those long term friendships have in your life. If your kids see that you have long-term, close and fulfilling friendships with others, they’ll emulate those kinds of relationships in their lives. Parents like this.
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November & December, 2010
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Five Ways to Help You and Your Child Survive Separation Anxiety By Kimberley Clayton Blaine, MFT
Saying good-bye is hard to do, especially if you’re the parent of a small child who suffers from separation anxiety. There is a good reason behind your toddler’s tears and offers up helpful solutions for making your “so-longs” a little less stressful. 16 November & December, 2010
It’s the moment every parent of a small child dreads: the good-bye. For parents of young children, it can be a gut-wrenching, heart-aching, guilt-ridden moment full of tears, protests, and quick getaways. Separation anxiety can ruin your workday, put a damper on your (rare!) dinner out, and keep you trapped in your house (and chained to your toddler). But that doesn’t have to be the case. Children can show signs of separation anxiety as early as six months, and young children can experience it at almost any age. One of the hardest scenarios for parents to deal with is dropping their clingy and crying toddler off at daycare. It can tug at your heartstrings and make you doubt yourself and your decisions. But the good news is that separation anxiety will pass—and there are some simple solutions to help you get to that point. “Toddlers,” she says, “understand about people leaving before they learn about people returning, and they can tell from your actions that you’re about to leave.” So, for most children (and their parents), anxiety begins to build even before you’ve stepped one foot out the door. Separation anxiety can show up in many forms. Your child may cry when you leave the room or refuse to be put down if she knows you’ll be leaving. Some children will even go so far as to follow their parents into every room all day long. It can be both frustrating and sad for parents when they feel as though they are causing their children sadness. Read on for five tips that will help saying “bye-bye” be a little bit easier for you and your child: Bring out the “Blankie”
Transitional objects, such as a favorite blanket or stuffed toy, can be reassuring to small children. In fact, to your child, these items are a symbol of you. They represent comfort, safety, and joy. Encouraging your child to attach to a transitional object early in infancy will allow him to be better at self-soothing later on. When you have to separate from your child, be sure that those www.familyworks.org
There aren’t many things that pull at your heartstrings more than having to leave a crying child who is reaching out for you... special objects are close at hand to provide comfort while you are away. Babies Love Satin
Rubbing the satin takes them back to the safety and security of the womb. Offering a blanket, stuffed toy, or other soft object to your little one during your absence will give him something familiar that will help to comfort him. It will make the transition easier for the both of you.
Practice Makes Perfect
It may seem silly for you to practice being apart from your child, but it can really make a big difference in the long run. If you know you’re going to be away for a longer than normal period, help your child work up to that separation by taking a series of short breaks, such as running next door for a minute or going out on a brief errand. Easing your child into separation is a great way to prepare her for being away from you. And you don’t even have to leave the house to get started. Tell your child that you’ll be going to another room and you’ll be back soon. This will help her to begin to make the connection that although you are gone now, you will come back.
Ask Your Sitter to Come Early
Whether you’re leaving your child for a dinner date with your spouse, or you have hired an in-home sitter to watch your little one while you are at work, leaving him in the hands of someone else can be stressful for both you and your baby. And even though you may not realize it, your child picks up on the anxiety you are feeling, and it will affect his reaction as well. To give you both peace of mind, be sure to spend some time with the sitter and your child together. If someone is coming to watch your child, have him or her come early so that all of you can spend some time together before you leave. This will help your child to see that this person is someone they can trust and will help both the child and your sitter familiarize themselves with one another. If you are relaxed and happy about the situation, your child is much more likely to be as well.
Leave on a Happy Note
Every parent has done the sneaky slip out the door in hopes of making a tearless getaway. But this is actually doing more harm than good. Just because the child doesn’t see you leave,
doesn’t mean she won’t eventually notice your absence. And in order to alleviate separation anxiety, you want to make sure your child is associating happy thoughts with your coming and going. Let her see you leave, even if it triggers the waterworks—and make sure there is a fun activity in place for her to take part in immediately following your departure. It’s hard to see your child cry when you leave, but, if you continue to sneak off, she’ll become even more worried that you might disappear at any random time. Say your goodbyes and then help her become involved in a fun activity that will occupy her as you leave. It may take a few tries, but eventually she’ll begin to associate your leaving with emotions other than anxiety and sadness. Ditch the Guilt
There aren’t many things that pull at your heartstrings more than having to leave a crying child who is reaching out for you. Situations of separation anxiety can create a sense of overwhelming guilt for parents. You want to be there for your child but there are times when you just can’t. And it’s not healthy for either of you if you constantly feel trapped in the situation. Remind yourself that this is a stage and you both will get through it. You aren’t a bad parent for leaving your child in tears. In fact, your efforts are working to raise a healthy, independent adult! Don’t minimize your child’s experience by getting resentful or angry if he goes into a tirade when you leave. It’s quite normal to feel at peace with your child’s neediness at one moment and then to feel agitated and overwhelmed the next. Try to find ways to balance your need for his independence with his needs to expand his world and feel safe. You’ll both be the better for it. Another important thing for parents to remember is that their anxiety can be contagious. The more anxious you are about leaving or about others caring for your little one, the more anxious she will be. Be calm, confident, and reassuring. And when you do return, take time to enjoy the warm welcome and extra hugs. Being apart makes reuniting that much sweeter. Kimberley Clayton Blaine, MA, MFT, is the executive producer of the online parenting show www.TheGoToMom.TV and author of The Go-To Mom’s Parents’ Guide to Emotion Coaching Young Children and The Internet Mommy.
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November & December, 2010
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The Hand
A Story of Giving Thanks
By Steve Goodier
Thanksgiving Day was near. The first grade teacher gave her class a fun assignment – to draw a picture of something for which they were thankful. Most of the class might be considered economically disadvantaged, but still many would celebrate the holiday with turkey and other traditional goodies of the season. These, the teacher thought would be the subjects of most of her student’s art And they were. But Douglas made a different kind of picture. Douglas was a different kind of boy. He was the teacher’s true child of misery, frail and unhappy. As other children played at recess, Douglas was likely to stand close by her side. One could only guess at the pain Douglas felt behind those sad eyes. Yes, his picture was different. When asked to draw a picture of something for which he was thankful, he drew a hand. Nothing else, just an empty hand. His abstract image captured the imagination of his peers. Whose hand could it be? One child guessed it was the hand of a farmer, because farmers raise turkeys. Another suggested a police officer, because the police protect and care for people. Still others guessed it was the hand of God. And so the discussion went – until the teacher almost forgot
the young artist himself. When the children had gone on to other assignments, she paused at Douglas’ desk, bent down, and asked him whose hand it was. The little boy looked away and murmured, “It’s yours, teacher. She recalled the times she had taken his hand and walked with him here or there, as she had the other students. How often she had said, “Take my hand, Douglas, we’ll go outside.” Or, “Let me show you how to hold your pencil.” Or, “Let’s do this together.” Douglas was most thankful for his teacher’s hand. Brushing aside a tear, she went on with her work. The story speaks of more than thankfulness. PACKAGES STARTING AT It says something about teachers $ 99 teaching, and parents parenting, and mo. friends showing friendship, and how Everyday low price much it means to the Douglasses of the The FAMILY™ package world. They might not always say thanks. America’s #1 Satellite TV Service Access to over 285 all-digital channels But they’ll remember the hand that Worry-free 99.9% signal reliability No Equipment to Buy! No Start-Up Costs! reaches. With 2-year agreement.° Offer ends 2/9/11. Credit card required (except in MA & PA). New approved customers only (lease required). $19.95 Handling & Delivery fee may apply. Steve Goodier is a professional Applicable use tax adjustment may apply on the retail value of the installation. $VN DERXW speaker, consultant, and author of nuDO RXU VSHFL Switch in minutes! RIIHUV merous books. Visit his site for more ˚2 YR.. LEASE AGREEMENT: Purchase of 24 consecutive months of any DIRECTV base programming package ($29.99/mo. or above) or qualifying international services bundle required. DVR service ($7/mo.) required for informationLove and Laughter at http// DVR and HD DVR lease. HD Access fee ($10/mo.) required for HD and HD DVR lease. FAILURE TO ACTIVATE IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE EQUIPMENT LEASE ADDENDUM MAY RESULT IN A CHARGE OF $150 PER RECEIVER. IF SERVICE IS TERMINATED EARLY, A CANCELLATION FEE OF $20/MO NTH REMAINING WILL APPLY. ALL EQUIPMENT IS LEASED AND MUST BE RETURNED TO DIRECTV UPON CANCELLATION, OR UNRETURNED EQUIPMENT FEES APPLY. VISIT directv.com OR CALL 1-800-DIRECTV FOR DETAILS. INSTALLATION: Standard professional installation only. Custom installation extra. LifeSupportSystem.com. Programming, pricing, terms and conditions subject to change at any time. Pricing residential. Taxes not included. Receipt of DIRECTV programming subject to DIRECTV Customer Agreement; copy provided at directv.com/
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18 November & December, 2010
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Kids with Special Needs and the Role of Early Childhood Educators
by Gary Direnfeld, LCSW
Kids with special needs are the delight of many early childhood educators. These kids unique characters, traits and physical needs push staff to creatively adapt themselves, environments and
indeed entire communities in order to best facilitate healthy development. Whole fields of work have emerged over the years, focusing attention on a multitude of aspects that contribute to
the positive growth of kids with special needs. It wasn’t so long ago that kids with special needs were shunted off behind closed doors, to be cared for in a kind of maintenance sort of way. Now there are movements afoot, such as integration, which seek to include kids in mainstream settings for socialization. Other movements concentrate on environmental factors, such as reducing barriers or providing adaptive play equipment or the political arena to bring about change in social policy to facilitate better service. Early childhood educators rise to the challenge posed by kids with special needs. Each child is like a unique jigsaw puzzle requiring an individualized approach to unlock the door to the most fruitful advancement. The educators’ reward for their labor is measured in smiles, a few words spoken, eye contact, a newly achieved self-care skill and sometimes just a hug. However, the single most important aspect of an early childhood educator’s role is pretty much never spoken. It is continued on page 23
Each child is like a unique jigsaw puzzle requiring an individualized approach to unlock the door to the most fruitful advancement. The educators’ reward for their labor is measured in smiles, a few words spoken, eye contact, a newly achieved self-care skill and sometimes just a hug. www.familyworks.org
November & December, 2010
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School Spotlight
The Mountain School
“In a world where we often rush, it’s nice to know that children can come here and experience purpose and happiness in everyday pursuits of life.“ - Brenda Novick, The Mountain School Faculty
Since 1990, The Mountain School has provided Marin County families with a .quality, Waldorf-inspired experience for children two-years-and-ninemonths to six years of age. Drawing from a deep knowledge of childhood development, our program encourages children to grow as whole human beings with balanced capacities to think, feel, and do. By nurturing their creativity and self-reliance with our play-based curriculum, we lay the foundation for future academic learning and a desire to be fruitfully engaged in the world. Based on the insights of Austrian educator Rudolph Steiner, Waldorf education recognizes that there are distinct developmental stages in the natural unfolding of a child’s personality. Our program is based on this philosophy and offers carefully determined, age-appropriate experiences that help prepare children for life as well as for future academic success. In place of facts and figures, we engage in activities such as building, cooking, sewing, crafts, gardening and cleaning -- activities that stimulate problem-solving, nurture independent expression, and thoughtfully develop fine and gross motor skills. Whether they’re serving snack to their classmates, acting out a new play, or learning to button their coats, children are absorbing at an early age skills that will serve them for the rest of their lives. These include: a love of learning gained through imagining and doing; a longer attention span as children create images through play and storytelling; a fuller understanding of abstract concepts as they interact with the natural world, rather than learn by rote; self-esteem and emotional maturity and a capacity for creative thinking. What Else Makes The Mountain School Different?
As it nurtures life skills, The Mountain School also cultivates wonder. Here, children know not only the warmth and security of home, but also the magic of stories, songs, universal myths, and the natural world around them. Our materials and activities encourage play that comes from within, drawing first and foremost on the child’s own imagination. Through songs, classic stories, and puppetry, children develop a fertile store of imagery that helps them appreciate and understand real-life experiences.
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Gratitude is fostered with a mealtime verse before the children engage in lunch and conversation. Music is woven into the texture of the day, as singing songs together eases all transitions. At the day’s end, a classic fairy tale, puppet show, or play provides imagery that enlivens each child’s fantasies. Our day also centers on a connection with nature and community in a way that helps children to appreciate and understand their place in the world. Always in tune with the magic that each season brings, we bake pumpkin muffins in autumn; we craft lanterns or orange and clove pomanders in winter. In springtime, the wind and budding flowers inspire us to fashion pinwheels or magic wands. Inspired by the rhythms of nature, each day at The Mountain School is designed to help children cultivate imagination, individuality, compassion, and self-respect. As we prepare children to meet the challenges of the modern world, it is our intention that they leave The Mountain School grounded in their beings, full of courage and creativity, and equipped with a powerful belief that they can do for themselves. If you would like to learn more about The Mountain School, please visit our website at www.themountainschool.org or call our director, Jody Meese at 415-924-4661. The Mountain School is located at 50 El Camino Drive in Corte Madera.
Consider a Change of Pace...
Marin Country Day School
Sixth Grade Information Evening For current fifth grade students and their parents Thursday, January 6 6:45–9:00 p.m. at MCDS 5221 Paradise Drive, Corte Madera 94925
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Mill Valley s Corte Madera San Anselmo s 2OSS s 4IBURON San Rafael s 4ERRA ,INDA
RSVP to admission@mcds.org
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#ALL "ETH AT 415.456.6630 WWW MUSICTOGETHEROFMARIN COM November & December, 2010
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2010 School Directory The German Language School of Marin We provide students with affordable, yet highly qualified instruction about the language, customs, history and culture of German speaking countries. Classes are given on Saturdays from 9:30 am - 12:00 noon and are open to anyone interested in learning German. www.germanschoolmarin.com. Lycée Français La Pérouse The only full French immersion school from PK through 12th grade in San Francisco and Marin (Corte Madera). A strong English program complements the authentic curriculum established by the French Ministry of Education. Our college preparatory school is ideal for engaged and active learners, ready to become multi-lingual world citizens. Open Houses: Nov 9 and Dec 8 in Corte Madera. www.lelycee.org.
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Marin Country Day School is a warm, inclusive, diverse community guided by core values of respect, responsibility and compassion. Children develop into excellent learners and good people through a broad-based, highly participatory curriculum. The vibrant spirit of all involved engage to make MCDS a good place for children. Primary points of entry are at kindergarten and grade 6. www.mcds.org.
The Mountain School The Mountain School provides quality, play-based care for preschoolers and Kindergartners in a cozy setting with dedicated, highly qualified teachers. Imaginative play, practical tasks, and rain-or-shine outdoor time alternate with stories, songs, and wholesome snacks. After these happy days “just being kids” our children, we’re told, go home singing! www. marinmountainschool.org.
Marin Waldorf School Pre-K through 8th grade. Our curriculum provides a rigorous academic education including foreign languages, arts, music, movement, and community festivals. Our program fosters critical thinking, emotional and social intelligence, and physical activity. Marin County’s only accredited Waldorf School. Open House November 6th 10am – noon. (415) 479-8190 x 102. www. marinwaldorf.org.
San Domenico School Parents: Have you ever felt forced to choose between a competitive school and a supportive one? At San Domenico School we don’t see a necessary distinction between highachieving students and happy, wellbalanced children. Find out more by touring our beautiful San Anselmo campus. Call 415-298-1905 or go to www.sandomenico.org/visit
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2010 School Directory Marin Tutors Kids With — A Recipe for Success —
Special Needs
continued from page 19
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interweaved and critical to every aspect of their work, yet there remains no reference to it anywhere. What’s so special about working with kids with special needs and the work of the early childhood educator? These children are unable to protect their own dignity and thus the most important aspect of an early childhood educator’s role is as the guardian of these kids’ dignity. It is not just that these kids cannot protect and fend for themselves, for if this were all that mattered, solutions are easy. There is a more human and pressing concern for these kids. Children with special needs must rely on the early childhood educator as guardians of their dignity. It is not for independence sake that early childhood educators embark on multi-facetted lesson plans. Increased independence and autonomy are often quite achievable. Early childhood educators do what they do with kids with special needs because of a more profound mission. They seek to develop the children’s sense of dignity, worth and value and if not in their eyes, then in the eyes of their community. When early childhood educators teach life skills, when they improve behavior and when they develop socialization abilities, it is in the pursuit of this dignity. At heart, this is why early childhood educators do what they do. Early childhood educators recognize the inherent worth and value of all human beings and seek to protect those who cannot protect themselves. With kids with special needs, they are protecting their dignity and at heart, this is what parents entrust them to do. November & December, 2010
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From the Good Earth Kitchen
Holiday Menu Our Kitchen is Offering Three Thanksgiving Dinners and Four Yummy Pies! Organic Turkey Dinner
From the Good Earth Hand-sliced Turkey Brest Kitchen Garlic Green Beans Turkey Grravy Sage Stuffing Mashed Potatoes
Cranberry Sause Single Dinner, $24 Dinner for 4, $92
Ipmjebz!Nfov Lasagna Dinner Our Organic KitchenPumpkin is Offering Three Vegeterian Pumpkin Lasagna ThanksgivingGarlic Dinners and Four Yummy Pies! Green Beans Cranberry Sause
Dinner for 4, $52 Organic Turkey DinnerSingle Dinner, $14 Organic Homemade Pies: Pumpkin Organic Pumpkin Vegeterian Almond Loaf Dinner Lasagna Dinner Almond Loaf Garlic Green Beans !PPLE s 0ECAN Walnut Pecan Grravy Cranberry Sause Vegan Single Pumpkin Vegan Almond Loaf Dinner Sage Stuffing Dinner, $20 Vegan Sashed Potatoes
Dinner for 4, $76
To place an order, stop by or call 454-0123 Organic Homemade Pies Pies Serve 6-8 Uibolthjwjoh!psefst!bddfqufe! Wheat free Almand Crust is available for an additional $2 uispvhi!Npoebz-!Opw/!33 Pumpkin Pie $21.98 Apple Pie $17.98
Pumpkin Pie $15.98 Pecan `$23.98 Each 1.25 pound Vegan dinner is presented in a Pie fully-recyclable and oven-heatable aluminum container
To place an order, stop by or call 454-0123 Thanksgiving Marin’s orders accepted Nov. 22 largest selection through of fine winesMonday, Made Each 1.25 pound dinner is presented in a fully-recyclable and oven-heatable aluminum container from Organic and Biodynamic Grapes Marin’s largest selection of fine wines Made from Organic and Biodynamic Grapes 1966 Sir Francis Drake Blvd Fairfax GeNatural.com OPEN N PEAY OYD EVER PM -9 DAY M 9A R E EV Y
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