BAR and CLUBBING Magazine by Richard Sunday

Welcome to the ‘April & May’ Issue of ‘BAR and CLUBBING Magazine’ ADVERT BOOKINGS - to arrange an informal meeting please contact us on 07876 752 514 or 0161 330 4121 - BARandCLUBBING.com or email: rick@BARandCLUBBING.com MAGAZINE DISTRIBUTORS want to stock BARandCLUBBING mag in your shop or venue (FREE Magazine) call 0161 330 4121 or 07876 752 514 and we will add you to our expanding distribution list. For current list of stockists please see www.BARandCLUBBING.com/blog DEADLINE for June/July Issue: FRIDAY 6TH MAY June/July Issue released on TUESDAY 31ST MAY or earlier! GIG GUIDE / ADVERT SUBMISSIONS Please email submissions or listings using the Contact Form on the BARandCLUBBING website no later than THURSDAY 5TH MAY SUBSCRIPTIONS: Get BARandCLUBBING Magazine delivered to your door every issue for a year for just £12.00 - Please send a PAYPAL ONLINE PAYMENT payable to ‘sales@BARandCLUBBING.com’ including your name, email and delivery address (if magazine is being sent to a different address) CONTRIBUTIONS We welcome creative individuals to contact us to offer submissions of written articles relating to the magazine. Articles and Photo contributions are welcome, Prints & Transparencies are sent at the owners risk as BARandCLUBBING cannot accept responsibility for loss or damage please email to rick@BARandCLUBBING.com LEGAL BLURB © copyright 2011 SmallWorld Web Hosting/BARandCLUBBING.com all rights reserved Nothing in this magazine can be reproduced in whole or part without the written permission from the publishers. We have done our utmost to ensure all content is correct & accurate but will emphasise that we, SmallWorld Web Hosting accept no responsibility for any mistakes or omissions. All opinions expressed in BARandCLUBBING are that of the contributor and may not be shared by the magazine or its publishers. PLEASE PASS THE MAGAZINE ONTO A FRIEND OR RECYCLE AFTER USE :-)

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FEATURES!

Back in Time, Neil Gannon p6 Win an iPod Shuffle p10 Get your Request Played p13 Classic Archive Gallery p14 Christies Charity Night p19 Mothers Day p20 Stalybridge Street Pastors p23

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REGULARS! WELCOME!

Bar Room Jokes p8 Gig Guide p12 Latest Photo Gallery p16 Shaun Lever Dancefloor Addict p21 Movie Page p22 Sudoku Challenge p24 Discount Vouchers p25

Win an iPod Shuffle in this issue by going to page 10, we have one up for grabs in every issue of the magazine Check out the Classic Archive Gallery wthis time from 2006 (when we were known as SundayNights.Com) as well as the New Gallery from the last few weeks on page 16 (can you spot yourself?) New Articles from Neil Gannon and Shaun Lever await your eyes also! Check out the ‘Derks Army’ Charity Night for Christies we attended on Thurs 17 Feb, a great night! see you next issue, Richard Sunday !

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Back in Time with Neil Gannon

‘This place used to be Player Bar, it used to be pretty good in here. I used to work behind the bar’ ‘Oh ok’, ‘This place used to be Boogie Wonderland. We used to go in here every Thursday night before we went into Love Shack’ ‘Oh ok’ By now I think she’s sick of hearing me talk about all the old bars that I remember from Ashton… ‘This place….’ ‘Oh ok’ By this point I believe my girlfriend is walking at a brisk pace towards the car park, almost leaving me in her wake. She’s usually the one who has to keep up with me. ‘I heard this place was rubbish anyway. That’s why it all shut down’ That is the general thought of people when it comes to Ashton nowadays. In the past there was a load of trouble, a load of violence, everything went quiet, bars shut down and now the area is dominated by vacated buildings. It’s quite sad walking down the streets now, knowing what it used to be, and comparing it to what it is today. The honest truth is that there was violence and there was trouble. I remember living at my parents house and picking up the newspaper to read of stabbings in Ashton. I was shocked, but my parents were even worse. They would always be concerned about me going to Ashton on a Thursday, Friday or Saturday night. They’d make sure I got in at a decent time and even when I got in and I sneaked up the stairs into my room, I could sense the relief coming from underneath their bedroom door. Despite all the violence and the trouble and the bad times, I still find myself smiling when I think back about Ashton. This is the place that I began drinking. This is the place where I came for my first night out. I’m sure it was the place where a lot of people came for their first night out too. I remember being there in Atomic when all the green laser lights were on and ‘Pretty Green Eyes’ was blasting out of the speakers. I remember being stood behind the bar at Chambers on New Year’s Eve working my arse off, but still enjoying it because it was such a good laugh. I recall walking into Beach Bar where the DJ box was a big speedboat and the bar girls were dressed in bikinis. They were really good times, really enjoyable times. I remember when a few of us who used to play cricket on a Saturday decided to go to Ashton afterwards. A couple of us obviously decided to get dressed up for it, but my other mate decided to go out in his

cricket whites. It was a cracking night. To this day I don’t think Atomic ever saw another person enter its doors wearing cricket whites. I remember deciding to have a wrestling match after a night out in Ashton. Fake of course. While i lay on the floor pretending to be dazed, my mate climbed onto the top of one of the market stalls in Ashton and did a picture perfect elbow drop right into my chest. Unfortunately the footage of that moment (taped on an old school phone) has been lost forever in the annals of history. I must also say, don’t try this at home. I remember the quarter finals of Euro 2004, with England playing Portugal. We decided to watch the game in The Bedroom and the game on a knife edge at 2-1 to Portugal. With minutes remaining Lampard scrambled the ball in from a corner and the place erupted. In jubilation I grabbed my mate, picked him up and threw him into the fruit machine. As a man who doesn’t do violence I’m actually shocked that I did it. I guess it’s 6 years late, but sorry Shaz. While I’m onto apologies I should also apologise to anyone who is in Atomic the night that a couple of mates and I presented what was one of the worst competitions ever. It involved eating a pot noodle and bouncing on one of those bouncy things. You know those space hopper things. Not at the same time of course. That would be messy. I don’t know who won but they won the most god-awful bottle of champagne you’ll ever see. I don’t think they seemed to mind. One of the greatest things that came from Ashton was the brand new house music you’d get every Sunday night. I can honestly say that Ashton converted me from a lost soul where music is concerned, to a full on funky house fanatic. Massive credit must go to the DJ’s who played in these times. They played the original music seamlessly and made the moments more memorable. Music that you hear now makes you think back to when you first heard it, and a lot of the time it makes me think of Ashton. Every single weekend there would be this curious bloke walking around with a camera taking photos of people. This bloke had created a website that was the Mecca if you did go out around the Tameside area. It had everything from photos, high quality sets from local DJ’s, to a forum where you could talk to friends and fellow clubbers!

SundayNights.com became a stable of my working life. I spent more time on SundayNights.com than I did on the various spreadsheets I had to sort out. The banter was awesome. Now it has manifested itself in the shape of a glossy magazine which (I’ve heard) has some great articles in it!

Everyone who lived through the Ashton Era will have their own moments. It could be a memorable Thursday in Atomic, or a mad Saturday in Heroes, or an amazing Sunday in The Loft. It could be a birthday, an exam celebration or even a win for England in the football. The important thing that I have learnt through life is that you should always cherish the memories you have, because you never know what’s going to happen in the future. That is why I still look at Ashton with a little bit of fondness. It was the time in my life that I will never forget. ‘This place used to be called Mr Cod. Everyone used to come here after a night out Funny thing is, they didn’t sell cod.’

Neil Gannon

Smart Recruitment Springfield House 298 Mossley Road Ashton-under-Lyne, OL6 6LP

Tel: 0161 339 8502 Smart Recruitment was established in March 2009, my colleagues and I are based in Tameside and cover all areas in the North West We supply professional, commercial, technical, sales, skilled, semi-skilled, warehouse, industrial and catering temporary and permanent staff. Collectively we have over 45 years experience in recruitment and pride ourselves on finding the right candidate first time, every time, without wasting your time. We are an independent agency with low overheads which means we can pass these savings onto our customers without compromising on the quality of our candidates. Special Offers start from ONLY 8% of the annual salary on any permanent positions regardless of salary. On temporary positions hourly rates FROM ÂŁ8.50 and no further fee if taken on permanently after 13 weeks.

www.SmartRecruitment.info email: Jeanette@SmartRecruitment.info page 7

Bar-Room Jokes! The invisible man married the invisible woman. Their kids were nothing to look at

You’re dark and handsome, when it’s dark, you’re handsome! How do you spot a blind man on a nudist beach? It’s not hard Why do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and put our junk in the garage? Why does mineral water that has ‘trickled through mountains for centuries’ have a sell-by date? Build a man a fire and he’s warm for a night. Set a man on fire and he’s warm for the rest of his life The man: “God, how long is a million years?” God: “To me, it’s about a minute.” The man: “God, how much is a million pound?” God: “To me it’s a penny.” The man: “God, may I have a penny?” God: “Wait a minute.” Johnny asked for time off work because his wife was going to have a baby. The following day, his boss asked him what it was - a boy or a girl. “To early to say,” said Johnny “it’ll be another 9 months before we know the answer to that” A young boy walked into a bar and asked for a bottle of beer and 20 cigarettes. “ now, now,” smiled the barmaid, wagging her finger. “Do you want to get me into trouble?” - He replied, “not at the moment, I just want my beer and fags” How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood? His hand caught fire. “Mummy Mummy, where do babies come from?” asked the little girl - “The Stork brings them” replied Mummy - “ who shags the Stork then?” “Jane that Milkman will have to go” said the enraged husband. “He’s so cheeky, he reckons he’s slept with every woman on this street, except one” “oh I know who that’ll be” replied his wife, “It’ll be her at number 32” “Its no good Mr Weeks, you’ll have to go on a healthier diet, try eating more fruit” said the doctor, - “But Doctor I do have a lot of fruit, why, I have 2 slices of lemon in every Gin and Tonic” A Scottish man burst into the local pub with a completely black tongue hanging from his mouth. “Whats happened to you?” asks one of his mates “a bottle of Whisky fell and broke on the hot tar road” he replied.

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A man went into a bar and ordered a Gin & Tonic, when it was placed before him, he exclaimed “My goodness, an ice cube with a hole in it, thats new to me” - “No it isn’t commented a sullen looking man sat next to him, “ I married one” A string walks into a bar and orders a drink. Sorry, we don’t serve strings, says the barman. That’s discrimination, says the string. So the string walks into the bathroom and ties himself in a knot and messes up his end. He comes back out and approaches the bar and again attempts to order a drink. Aren’t you that string I just refused to serve? asks the barman. No. I’m a frayed knot. A pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them up and the bartender says, Don’t you need to know where the bathroom is? The pig says, No, I go wee wee all the way home. A guy walks into a bar, sits down and hears a small voice say, You look nice today. A few minutes later he again hears a small voice, That’s a nice shirt. The guy asks the bartender, Who is that? The bartender says, Those are the peanuts. They’re complimentary! A man walks into a bar and says, Give me a beer before problems start! Again, the man orders a beer again saying, Give me a beer before problems start! The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, When are you going to pay for these beers? The man answers, Now the problems start!

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender says, We have a drink named after you. The grasshopper says, You’ve got a drink named Steve? A duck walks in a bar and orders a beer then says put it on my bill. Charles Dickens: I’ll have a Martini Bartender: Olive or Twist? What’s the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 beers. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots of tequila from the bartender. As he slams the 10th one, the bartender says, I don’t think you should be drinking those so fast. You would if you had what I have, the man says, throwing back number 11. Well, what is it you have? The man throws back his last shot and says, Fifty cents. A businessman walks into a bar and orders a Martini. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket then he orders another Martini. After he finishes that one, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders another Martini. The bartender finally asks the man why he keeps looking inside his shirt before ordering a Martini. The man says, I’m peeking at a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, then I know it’s time to go home. A man walked into a bar and ordered Martini after Martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives the Irishman started to leave. The bartender asked him what that was all about and he said, my wife just sent me out for a jar of olives. Four Fonts walk into a bar and the barman says, Get out! We don’t want your TYPE in here! If the Government gets up your nose......Then picket!

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Win an iPod Shuffle

we’re sure you can do a lot better than these guys !

Hello there readers, from this Issue and every future Issue we’ll be giving away an iPod Shuffle (the new 4th generation) Great for using at the gym, jogging, skiving at work or on the train or bus to town!

“How do I have a chance of winning one?” we hear you ask! All you need to do is get a photograph taken of yourself with this copy of ‘BAR and CLUBBING Magazine’ and either email it to rick@barandclubbing.com or upload your photo to facebook and tag in ‘BAR and CLUBBING’ (search barand clubbing) and tag yourself too! We will pick a winner based on creativity, humour and originality, entries to be in before 30th April with the winner being contacted and published in the next issue what are you waiting for? - get creative and get snapping!

Latest Entertainment @ ‘The Pineapple’ The Pineapple are pleased to announce the launch of ‘The Battle of The Bands’ - a four week Music Competition beginning on Friday 1st April with the first round, continuing every Friday Night each week to the Grand Final on Friday April 22nd. Entries are just £25 per band and there will be a £200 Cash Prize for the band that goes all the way, plus Radio Air Time for all Finalists, if you have not yet registered your interest ring 07580 147 687 at the earliest

opportunity or email realrock@realrockpromotions.co.uk Each band gets a Professional DVD of their performance too. Saturdays we now have ‘Ignition’ and don’t forget every Sunday in April we have Reggae with ‘Ernie B’ from 5pm! Thursday Nights are ‘Jam Night’ Open Mic, so come and meet your welcoming hosts Mandy and Lee and relax and have fun with us very soon !

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gig guide April & May Thurs 7 April

Friday 8 April

Friday 1 April

Saturday 2 April

Lions bar

DJ MP

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

The Pineapple Battle of the Bands 1st Round

Saturday 9 April

Sunday 3 April Lions bar

Monday 4 April

Ignition

Don’t Forget it’s Mothers Day today!

Want to get your bar, pub or event or club listed on the next ‘Gig Guide’ ? Contact ‘Richard Sunday’ on facebook, ring 07876 752 514 or email: rick@BARandCLUBBING.com for details!

Sunday 10 April

Monday 11 April

Tuesday 12 April

The Pineapple

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

The Pineapple Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Tuesday 5 April

Wednes 13 April

Wednes 6 April

Thurs 14 April

Lions bar

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Indie Night in the Den

The Pineapple

Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

Battle of the Bands 2nd Round

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

The Pineapple

Lions bar

Ignition

Saturday 16 April Sunday 17 April

Monday 18 April

Lions bar

DJ MP

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Want to get your bar, pub or event or club listed on the next ‘Gig Guide’ ? Contact ‘Richard Sunday’ on facebook, ring 07876 752 514 or email: rick@BARandCLUBBING.com for details!

Friday 15 April

The Pineapple Battle of the Bands 3rd Round

The Pineapple

The Pineapple Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Ignition

Saturday 23 April Sunday 24 April

Lions bar

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den Bangla City Soul & Motown

The Pineapple

Lions bar

Monday 25 April

Tuesday 26 April

Tuesday 19 April

The Pineapple Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

Rififi

Monday 9 May

Battle of the Bands Grand Final

Easter Thurs DJ Jon Fitz Back2House!

Wednes 27 April

Thurs 28 April

Friday 29 April

Saturday 30 April

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

The Pineapple

Rififi

Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

Ibiza Terrace Party

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

Rififi

Ibiza Terrace Party

Shameless Night with guest ‘Mickey Mcguire’

Want to get your bar, pub or event or club listed on the next ‘Gig Guide’ ? Contact ‘Richard Sunday’ on facebook, ring 07876 752 514 or email: rick@BARandCLUBBING.com for details!

Ibiza Terrace Party

The Pineapple

Lions bar

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Rififi

DJ MP

Lions bar

Monday 2 May

Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Friday 22 April

Lions bar

Sunday 1 May

The Pineapple

Thurs 21 April

Lions bar

Indie Night in the Den

Ignition

Lions bar

Wednes 20 April

Tuesday 10 May

Tuesday 3 May

Wednes 4 May

Thurs 5 May

Friday 6 May

Ignition

Saturday 7 May

Lions bar

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

The Pineapple Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

The Pineapple

Sunday 8 May

Lions bar

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

The Pineapple Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Ignition

Wednes 11 May

Thurs 12 May

Friday 13 May

Saturday 14 May

Sunday 15 May

Lions bar

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

The Pineapple Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

The Pineapple

Monday 16 May

The Pineapple Reggae with Ernie B 5pm

Ignition

Tuesday 17 May

Wednes 18 May

Thurs 19 May

Friday 20 May

Saturday 21 May

Lions bar

Sunday 22 May

Monday 23 May

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Want to get your bar, pub or event or club listed on the next ‘Gig Guide’ ? Contact ‘Richard Sunday’ on facebook, ring 07876 752 514 or email: rick@BARandCLUBBING.com for details!

Monday 30 May

Tuesday 31 May

The Pineapple Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

The Pineapple Ignition

Wednes 25 May

Thurs 26 May

Friday 27 May

Lions bar

Indie Night in the Den

DJ MP

The Pineapple Open Mic ‘Jam Night’

Saturday 28 May

Lions bar

DJ MP - Theme Night ‘Go Funk Yourself’ in the Den Bangla City Soul & Motown

The Pineapple Ignition

Sunday 29 May

Lions bar

DJ Gilly - Indie & Dance

Tuesday 24 May

10 Ways to get your request played Most DJ’s are grumpy & arrogant. Wouldn’t you be though if you spent your whole working day dealing with abuse & insults? You don’t always see it from your side of the DJ booth but fuelled with alcohol and illegal sherbet dip I’ve been on the receiving end of some right abuse. Being called every name under the sun because you won’t play track 8 off Chase & Status’ album is a common thing, and no matter how much you explain or reason, not many people understand that you’re there to do and a job and have a mortgage to pay or a family to feed. For a while now i’ve been thinking of telling it how it is from our point of view, but compared to what nurses on a Saturday night in casualty we’re pretty lucky, so I had a really good think about it, and I thought I’d compile a list of the best ways to get your requests played by DJ’s in bars & clubs. 1) If you ask for a really big track it’s gonna get played anyway when everybody is in the venue. Manager’s will sack DJ’s who play the same thing all night as hearing it every 20 minutes discourages people to stay in a venue. Pick something original while it’s quiet, maybe one that’s brand new or a bit of an oldie that you’ve not heard in a while. 2) When you make a request, don’t come back 5 minutes later and ask where your song is! All you’re gonna do is infuriate the DJ and make you wait longer on purpose for your rudeness. Sometimes it’s not practical to play a request straight away, eg if your DJ is playing a bit of funky house and you want an R’n’B track – they won’t mix together. The best thing is to come back half an hour later and politely say “I hope you haven’t forgotton my request!” 3) Don’t ask for your tune to be played Next! There’s so many reasons why this is wrong, but the main one is that you are not the most important person in the bar or club so why should you get special treatment? I treat everybody equally & fairly. I’ve had many celebrities come in to my venues and i’ve made them wait like everybody else. The other thing is that in many cases, the next track has been chosen, it may also not be appropriate at that time and as well don’t forget there are many other requests in too.

6) Don’t ask for something so obscure that nobody else could possibly like it other than you! You’re wasting your time and wasting the DJ’s time. If you want obscure underground British Grime then go to a night dedicated to it please! By all means though message the DJ before hand on facebook and suggest it, some of my biggest tracks over the years have actually come in like that. 7) Adagio For Strings by Tiesto or Insomnia by Faithless will NOT get everyone going at 9.30pm when there’s 15 people in! It’s more likely to make them leave cos it’s too heavy. Tracks like that should be play when everybody is going for it in a full room! 8) Don’t say “I’m going in 10 minutes can you play my request?”. It doesn’t work because what bloody use is that? Am I really going to reward you shooting off to another bar by sorting your tune out? I think not! 9) When you get to the DJ booth, it really helps if you actually know what you want to request, there’s nothing more frustrating than somebody who says “What have you got”? Sorry, we’re not karaoke hosts! Which reminds me, No, your mate can’t MC! 10) Finally... Smile! We don’t see many and we like it! A friendly face in a room of strangers is someone that a DJ wants to keep happy. Article by DJ Shaun Lever

4) Try to be polite, a ‘please’ goes a long way when you’re taking abuse from every angle. The chances are that good manners will get your request played as soon as is physically possible. You don’t have to thank us, it’s what we’re paid to do but a simple please actually makes my night! You wouldn’t believe some of the methods people use for requests. Some people actually man handle you like they’re gonna punch you if you won’t follow orders. Thank God for door staff. 5) Wait while the DJ has finished mixing in his tune and for goodness sake don’t try to speak to a DJ whilst he’s talking on a microphone! This never used to happen but i’ve had it loads in the last year. It defies all logic! How can the DJ talk on a microphone and speak you at the same time? Usually if one track is being mixed into another then the DJ needs 100% concentration. Just wait by the side of the booth, the chances are that the DJ has seen you and will speak to you asap.

Shaun Lever is our Resident Writer for ‘BAR and CLUBBING Magazine’ - Is an established Music Producer having appeared in the charts with numerous dance acts. He currently DJ’s across the country as well as his now legendary residency at Darli in Warrington. Locally you can still hear him on the radio every Friday night on 99.7fm OCR 8-9pm. You can also find him at www.facebook.com/djshaunlever

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FX Leisure - Stalybridge FREE DAY PASS for TWO! Photo ID Required Valid up to 31st May 2011

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ollowing this first diagnosis, Derrick began treatment in November 2007 with Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy for 6 months, then another 2 months followed by a third lot of 2 months, after a major struggle and a great earlier fundraising event at BigWigs in Audenshaw Derrick had the all clear in early 2010. Unfortunately Derricks Hodgkins Lymphoma made a viscious return in October of last year, not to be beaten again, Derrick formed ‘Derk’s Army’ with a close friend ‘Laura Jameson’ with the aim of setting up different ways to raise cash for Christies as well as ..

errick Evans was first diagnosed in October of 2007 with Hodgkins Lymphoma, a cancer originating from white blood cells affecting the lymphatic system and can spread to other Lymph glands in the body. Derrick’s treatments currently include Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy which is managed by a caring team situated at Christie’s Hospital in South Manchester. Derk’s Army takes control of a great fundraising night!

a) Raise Awareness b) Get as many people to join the ‘Derk’s Army’ facebook c) Purchase ‘Derk’s Army T-Shirts’ to raise extra funds The recent Charity Night at The Village Hotel in Ashton came together in a matter of weeks when Derrick met event organiser ‘Angela Murphy’ through another friend, Angela’s modelling project, the ‘England Glamour Dolls’ was perfect to add a catwalk show and competition as part of the charity gig and the night went smooth and professionally. Extra’s on the night were performances from local band ‘Dirty Weekend’ and ‘The Front’ with local ‘Tameside Radio’ Personality ‘Wayne Kay’ compering the night. The Modelling Third Place went to ‘Grania Nesbitt’ 18, from Mottram, studying performing arts at college, the Second place went to ‘Leanne Chapman’ 25, from Ashton who works in Childcare at ‘Clockwork Day Nursery’ with the First Place going to ‘Dion Joy’ 20, from Mottram, who works at ‘Paul’s Hair World’ - everyone worked really hard and Angela Murphy thanks all the ladies for taking part!

(above) Katy Roberts, Sharon Leary, Vicky Galloway & Jenny Quinn (2nd photo) Derrick Evans & Richard Sunday (3rd photo) Gavin Blemmings & Angela Murphy (below left) The EGD’s line up: Hannah Stark, Rebecca Hughes, Joanne Clapham, Stephanie Andrews, Rachel Oneill, Lindsey Barton, Dion Joy, Leanne Chapman, Gaynor Carol Thorpe, Jena Sadok, Grania Nesbitt & Chloe Green (below right) The Cheque presented to Christies - MC Dadge, Lindsey Barton, Angela Murphy, Gaynor Carol Thorpe, Derrick Evans and a Christies Representative.

With donations still coming in, cash raised is now over £2500! you can still purchase ‘Derk’s Army T-Shirts’ from Jenny Quinn priced at £10 each by ringing 07931 474 977 plus don’t forget to join the facebook group by searching for ‘Derk’s Army’

Article by Richard Sunday

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Don’t forget on Sunday 3rd April it’s ...

Mothers Day!

What did your Mother teach you?

You know when you are a Mum because

My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION... “Just wait until your father gets home.”

You have time to shave only one leg at a time. 2. You hide in the bathroom to be alone. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING.... It’s that time of year when that special day 3. Your kid throws-up and you catch it. “You are going to get it when we get home!” comes along again to honour someone 4. Someone else’s kid throws up at a party. special, you know, your Mother! You keep eating. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE “What were you thinking? Answer me when I 5. As you cling to the high moral ground on The woman that has slaved all these years toy weapons; your child chews his toast talk to you! Don’t talk back to me!” looking after you, cleaning the house, cooking into the shape of a gun. your meals, washing your clothes, making My Mother taught me LOGIC... 6. You hope ketchup is a vegetable, since sure you are well mannered and well behaved “If you fall out off that swing and break your it’s the only one your child eats. neck, your not going to the store with me.” and what do you do? you take it all for 7. You find yourself cutting your husband’s granted! (well, some of you do anyway) sandwiches into cute shapes. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE... 8. You hear your mother’s voice coming out “If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are We’ve now given you a ‘head’s up’ incase it of your mouth when you say, “NOT in going to freeze that way.” had slipped your mind, so now you have a your good clothes!” chance to really make an impact (that means My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD... 9. You stop criticising the way your mother make an effort) to get out and ‘try’ and do raised you. “If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll something nice for the ‘woman of the house’ never get a good job.” 10. You donate to charities in the hope that your child won’t get that disease. My Mother taught me ESP... Yes, it might be easy to nip out early Sunday 11. You hire a sitter because you haven’t “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know Morning to ‘Freshco’ and get a cheap card been out with your husband in ages, when you’re cold?” and some flowers but can you get a little then spend half the night checking on more creative this year? the kids. My Mother taught me HUMOR... Maybe you can make your own card with 12. You use your own saliva to clean your “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, some recent photos you can print from your child’s face. don’t come running to me.” computer and buy a book your mum has been hinting she wants to read - you could arrange My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN a nice family meal and book a table at one of ADULT... the local restaurants (theres a few in here ;-) “If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.” Whatever you decide to do, do it with sincerity because a little genuine thanks and love to your ‘hard done by’ Mother will come My Mother taught me about SEX.... back ten-fold! “How do you think you got here?” The modern Mother’s Day is celebrated on various days in many parts of the world, most My Mother taught me about GENETICS... commonly in March, April, or May as a day to honor mothers and motherhood. In the UK “You’re just like your father.” and Ireland, it follows the old wtraditions of Mothering Sunday, celebrated in March/April. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE... Lamberts thought this day emerged from a “When you get to be my custom of mother worship in ancient Greece, age, you will understand.” which kept a festival to Cybele, a great mother of Greek gods.{Encyclopædia BritanAnd my all time favorite... nica|(1959)Vol.15,p. 849} This festival was JUSTICE... held around the Vernal Equinox around Asia “One day you’ll have kids, Minor and eventually in Rome itself from the and I hope they turn out just like you....Then you’ll Ides of March (15 March) to 18 March see what it’s like.”

Shaun Lever

Dancefloor Addict! Hello there my Disco Abusers! As ever I have here a selection of new and mad tracks cutting up the dancefloor somewhere in a club near you. Where we can we have also added the youtube URL so you can check it out online! don’t thank me just buy me a beer ;-)

Skepta

Basto

Tyken

It goes:- “Somebody remind me, what happened last night”

It goes:- “Hard to describe but it’s got a nice piano in it that sounds like Bromance”

It goes:- “you can hold to your every word... then it goes a bit mental!”

Skepta have come along way since dropping one of the greatest Grime party breaks 4 years ago with “Doin’ it again”. Amnesia is never gonna win awards with critics, it’s basically about getting leathered and trying to retrace your steps. We’ve all done it and the lyrics give me a giggle, great party tune and nicely touched up by man of the moment Liam Keega. 7/10

In an era where new dance music is being widely ignored by commercial radio and clubs, here’s a gem that may cross over... “Gregory’s Theme” reminds me a bit of PPK – “Resurrection” from years ago fused with a very uplifting piano and more to the point is a bootleggers dream so expect loads of illegal vocal versions doing the rounds. I play it with Alison Limerick “Where Love Lives” over the top and it goes off everytime! 8/10 youtube.com/watch?v=lD1ZsgOOGt8

Originally from 2007, this is just a touch up of the Dave Spoon remix, except just when you think it’s the original mix, this big electro bass kicks and makes your whole crowd shit themselves! I watched my boss jump out of his seat the other week on the drop, it was a funny moment! It’s a speaker break alright almost bordering on speed garage. Not recommended for people recovering from major surgery! 8/10

Aron Jay & Jay Macilroy Papa’s

Olav Basoski

Amnesia

youtube.com/watch?v=l_70a_tFddQ

Cassius

I Love You So (Skream Remix)

It goes:- “Ooh I loved you so, but why I loved you i’ll never know” This raises the question... at what point do you draw the line between artistic dubstep and scally happy hardcore? It begins as a soulful piece of gospel then builds into something sounding like it was made in 1993 by Force & Styles or someone, flipping back into dubstep and back again. It’s just great to have something really uplifting and original to change the pace of a set and bring DJ’s out of that dull 128bpm mix 8/10 youtube.com/watch?v=tWvLiSrZnLw

Gregory’s Theme

got a brand New Beat

It goes:- “Ain’t no drag, papa’s got a brand new bag... with a nice twisted bass to follow”

Every Word (Coney Bootleg Mix)

youtube.com/watch?v=3Y_tmHE7Vss A New Day

It goes:- “All I can say, it’s a new day, what can I do, I still love you”

Olav disappeared into obscurity for5 As the title suggests there’s no alarm and no years or so and last month a load of his surprises that it’s a rework of James Brown. I tracks began to surface with a really fresh love tracks like this, really party winners that disco house sound which I can see shaping the summer. Chopping up disco loops and go from a well know classic crowd pleasers into an almighty bass drop. This does some just creating nice uplifting melodies out of them. “A New Day” is just lovely stuff, the right damage and has been a real hit with kind of track that suggests “Put your hands me over the last couple of months! Funky in the air and keep ‘em there!” His mix of Electro house at its’ best. 9/10 the aforementioned “Gregory’s Theme” is also as uplifting as as an elephant on the sniff! 10/10 !! youtube.com/watch?v=N2HKqCtGDvA

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MOVIE REVIEW’S Rubber

Arthur

Rio

April 1st

April 8th

April 15th

Irresponsible charmer Arthur Rubber is the story of Robert, (Russell Brand) has always an inanimate tyre that has relied on two things to get by: been abandoned in the desert, his limitless fortune and the and suddenly and inexplicably good sense of lifelong nanny comes to life. As Robert roams Hobson (Helen Mirren) to the bleak landscape, he discovkeep him out of trouble. Now ers that he possesses terrifying he faces his biggest challengetelepathic powers that give him -choosing between an the ability to destroy anything arranged marriage that will he wishes without having to ensure his lavish lifestyle or move. At first content to prey an uncertain future with the on small desert creatures and one thing money can’t buy, various discarded objects, his Naomi (Greta Gerwig), the only woman he has ever loved. attention soon turns to humans, especially a beautiful and mysterious woman who crosses his path. Leaving a swath ofWith Naomi’s inspiration and some unconventional help destruction across the desert landscape, Robert becomes a from Hobson, Arthur will take the most expensive risk of his chaotic force to be reckoned with, and truly a movie villain life and finally learn what it means to become a man, in this for the ages. Written by ‘Mr Oizo’ of Flat Beat music fame! re-imagining of the classic romantic comedy “Arthur.”

Prom

April 29th

Thor

May 6th

At “Prom,” every couple has a The epic adventure THOR spans story and no two are exactly the Marvel Universe from prealike. Several intersecting stosent day Earth to the mystical ries unfold at one high school realm of Asgard. as the big dance approaches; “Prom” portrays the precariAt the center of the story is The ous passage from high school Mighty Thor, a powerful but arto independence as some rogant warrior whose reckless relationships unravel and othactions reignite an ancient war. ers ignite. For Nova Prescott As a result, Thor is banished to (Aimee Teegarden), it’s a battle Earth where he is forced to live of wills as she finds herself among humans. drawn to the guy (Thomas McDonell) who gets in the way of her perfect prom. Fellow When the most dangerous villain of his world sends its seniors Mei (Yin Chang) and Tyler (De’Vaughn Nixon) harbor darkest forces to invade Earth, Thor learns what it takes to secrets, while others face all the insecurity and anticipation be a true hero that surrounds one of high school’s most seminal events. There are hundreds of nights in high school, but there’s only one “Prom

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 On Stranger Tides May 20th

Pirates is back yet again (in 3D, no really???) Captain Jack Sparrow with the enigmatic Angelica (Penelope Cruz), he’s not sure if it’s love— or if she’s a ruthless con artist who’s using him to find the fabled Fountain of Youth. When she forces him aboard the “Queen Anne’s Revenge,” the ship of the legendary pirate Blackbeard (Ian McShane), Jack finds himself on an unexpected adventure in which he doesn’t know whom to fear more: Blackbeard or Angelica, with whom he shares a mysterious past.. a ‘must see’

page 22

... another round-up of the New Movies coming very soon to a Cinema near you ...

Rio is a 3-D animation feature from the makers of the “Ice Age” films. Set in the magnificent city of Rio de Janeiro and the lush rainforest of Brazil, the comedy-adventure centers on Blu, a rare macaw who thinks he is the last of his kind. When Blu discovers there’s another and that she’s a she - he leaves the comforts of his cage in small town Minnesota and heads to Rio. But it’s far from love at first sight between the domesticated and flightchallenged Blu and the fiercely independent, high-flying female, Jewel. Unexpectedly thrown together, they embark on an adventure of a lifetime

Bridesmaids May 13th

The story centers on a maid of honor (Kristen Wiig) competing with a bridesmaid (Rose Byrne) for the attention of the bride. Brought to you by the producers of Knocked Up, The 40 Year Old Virgin and Superbad

The Tree of Life

Kung Fu Panda 2

From Terrence Malick, the acclaimed director of such classic films as Badlands, Days of Heaven and The Thin Red Line, The Tree of Life is the impressionistic story of a Midwestern family in the 1950’s.

In “Kung Fu Panda 2”, Po is now living his dream as The Dragon Warrior, protecting the Valley of Peace alongside his friends and fellow kung fu masters, The Furious Five. But Po’s new life of awesomeness is threatened by the emergence of a formidable villain, who plans to use a secret, unstoppable weapon to conquer China and destroy kung fu.

May 27th

May 26th

The film follows the life journey of the eldest son, Jack, through the innocence of childhood to his disillusioned adult years as he tries to reconcile a complicated relationship with his father (Brad Pitt). Jack (played Po must look to his past and uncover the secrets of his as an adult by Sean Penn) finds himself a lost soul in the mysterious origins; only then will he be able to unlock the modern world, seeking answers to the origins and meaning strength he needs to succeed. of life while questioning the existence of faith. Through Malick’s signature imagery, we see how both brute nature and spiritual grace shape not only our lives as individuals and families, but all life

Stalybridge Street Pastors You may have seen groups of these blue coated people in and around Stalybridge as you are on your night out, but do you actually know who they are? BAR and CLUBBING Magazine catches up with the local ‘Street Pastor Team’ Coordinator ‘Angela Trewinnard’ who gives us an insight to their work and their caring eye on the local nightlife community. Local Church Pastors Angela and her husband Phil had a vision to begin a Street Pastor team locally as there wasn’t one at the time and Greater Manchester now has 8 teams, each Street Pastor has intensive training on a course in Manchester before they can begin this volunteer work which involves; domestic abuse, street safety, drug & substance awareness, alcohol awareness, child protection, conflict resolution and much more! The teams are out every Friday Night in Stalybridge with the fourth weekend of the month out on the Saturday and are out from 9:30 pm up to around 3:00 am keeping an extra caring eye on the revellers that visit the town. Angela tells us about some of the services they provide; We give out ‘Spikeys’ which are a plastic stopper which goes in to the top of a regular drinks/alcopops bottle, these have a hole for the straw and a great way to stop drinks being spiked .We always advise that people should finish their drinks before they go outside to keep themselves and their friends safe. We carry bottles of water, sick bags and rain ponchos (in bad weather) We also give out flip flops as many girls take off their shoes or high heels when their feet get tired and aching. We also find that bottles may be left on the street from some people who may be drinking in advance of arriving in the town, which can lead to broken glass on the pavements if they get kicked or knocked,

and we want to help prevent serious cuts from this. Here are just a couple of examples of where we have been able to help out. In December of last year we found a young man of about 18, wearing a short sleeved shirt in freezing temperatures of -8, he was sat on the pavement propped against a shop shutter very drunk and sick, with concern he could get hypothermia a space blanket was wrapped around him and he was assisted home safely. Another episode earlier on in July 2010 we came across three young men by the canal on Armentieres Sq who had been drinking and were egging each other on to go swimming, we persuaded them against doing so with the dangers of drowning until they left the area. Although we are a Christian Organisation, our role is not to preach, but to listen, care and offer support where we can. We want you to be safe while still enjoying your evening. So the next time you are on your night out, do come over and say hello as we always have time to chat.

Check out the ‘Stalybridge Street Pastor’ Video on YouTube by simply searching with: Stalybridge Street Pastors or typing in this full URL youtube.com/watch?v=vZW0QNcVtIA Some of your local Street Team. from (L to R): Sheila Benns, Judy Parker, David Waite and Sean Tully

(above top) Angela Trewinnard talks on the youtube clip

page 23

‘BAR and CLUBBING’ Sudoku Challenge!

Easy page 24

Want to have ‘BAR and CLUBBING’ Magazine displayed in your place of work or shop/business? A free magazine for your customers to read, we can also offer you an affordable advertising solution! Call Richard on 07876 752 514 for an informal chat!

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THE CHILLI TREE Sandwich Shop Stalybridge This Voucher entitles the bearer to 10% off all ‘outside catering’ Valid until 31st May 2011

CHARLESTOWN Auto’s - Stalybridge

LIONS Bar - Stalybridge

This Voucher entitles the bearer to MOT Class 4 - £35.00 MOT Class 7 - £45.00 Valid until 31st May 2011

This Voucher entitles the bearer to 1 free shot of Cactus Jack or Sour Dragon with your first main drink purchased Valid until 31st May 2011

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The PINEAPPLE Pub - Stalybridge

RIFIFI Nightclub - Stalybridge

This Voucher entitles the bearer to 1 FREE Glass of Bubbly with your first drink order Valid until 31st May 2011 (Ask about our New Loyalty Card)

Use this voucher for x1 Free Entry any Friday or Saturday Night Valid during April and May only

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The Curry Cottage - Dukinfield This Voucher entitles the bearer to TWO Main Meals for the price of ONE Valid up to 31st May

FRANCIS HOUSE FUND RAISER! Not every little girl dreams of being Cinderella, but many do. This is why ‘Miss Teeny Tiny Tameside’ exists so that every girl who dreams about getting up on stage and shining for that beautiful moment can! “Miss Teeny Tiny Tameside” is on Sunday March 20th from 12 midday in aid of ‘Francis House’

Bridgefield Curry Lounge - Stalybridge YOU MUST RING TO PRE-BOOK YOUR TABLE FIRST and bring this voucher This Voucher entitles the bearer to TWO Main Meals for the price of ONE Monday to Thurs Nights up to 31st May 11

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Hi-Q - Dukinfield

This Voucher entitles the bearer to 30% off single treatments, t&c’s apply

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at The Village Hotel in Ashtonu-Lyne. In loving memory of Cameron Jones. The Entry Ages are between 30 months and 11 years old. For full entry details and to contact the organisers please visit: wix.com/teenytinytameside/prizes or email: kate_laughton@yahoo. co.uk - your kids will love it !!

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STOP PRESS

You might think a local council like ‘Tameside’ would work more ethically and honestly when handling millions of pounds and keeping the borough in an above average order. Not the case with the Traffic Wardens who stood back and watched when I parked my car on Waterloo Road in Stalybridge (in what ‘was’ a free short stay spot) which has now been changed to a permit only spot. Now I’m the first to hold my hands up when in the wrong, but these wardens held back and waited until I

NO PHOTOCOPIES ACCEPTED had gone out of sight before pouncing on my car and issuing a fine as quick as they could (a passer-by waited for me to return) what a sly and nasty way to work !!! what they could have done was politely shout across to me “sir, sorry could you please choose another spot as that is now a new permit zone“ Is this the way it is now, fleece off a few extra pounds? (£70 if I don’t pay quickly) I would have moved my car with a smile immediately if asked to by a polite warden, but no, this deceitful work tactic just makes more of us lose any respect we had for the council, sort it out Tameside !