bathimpact Volume 15 Issue 05 by bathimpact

bathimpact The University of Bath Students’ Union Newspaper

Volume 15 Issue 5

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Monday 18th November 2013

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Chancellor’s Installation, pg 12

Mary Berry turns Bath on Marianne Gros bathimpact Contributor he University of Bath is home to outstanding research groups, who have long focused on cross-disciplinary studies and who have made valuable contributions to various research ﬁeld. These include the ﬁelds of science, engineering, social sciences and management. A great number of driven specialists, along with professional and academic support, make use of state of the art facilities here at Bath in an attempt to come up with breakthroughs that will have a major impact on society. Pharmacy and Pharmacology has in fact just started a trial for their new drug, Irosustat, which could potentially help thousands of breast cancer patients. The drug was initiated by Bath’s medicinal chemistry group and aims

to block the production of œstrogen, which is the source of cancer development for the majority of cases. Having already been part of several clinical trials on an international scale with hormone as the original issue, the drug is now in a partnership with a clinical therapy known as ‘aromatase inhibitor’. It attempts to block the production of œstrogen as well, but from another pathway. The key is to ﬁgure out whether the combination of the two will manage to block more œstrogen from both pathways and therefore reduce chances cancer development. Irosustat is part of a spin-off company called Sterix Ltd, which was co-founded by Bath’s own Professor Barry Potter along with the Pharmacy & Pharmacology Department of Imperial College in London. In 2004 it was acquired by the pharmaceutical company Ipsen.

Bath’s Biology & Biochemistry Department has also witnessed some positive results, with the newly found evidence on ways of curing on curing Lewy Body dementia, as well as Parkinson’s disease. Specialists in charge of the research have potentially found a way to reduce the levels of alpha-synuclein, a protein linked to both diseases. More than 100,000 people in the UK alone are affected by this particular type of dementia, and are suffering from symptoms such as memory loss and hallucinations. Research suggests that the alpha-synuclein protein forms abnormal clumps in the brains of people affected by either dementia or Parkinson’s, the primary difference being the area of the brain that is affected. However, Professor David Brown, from the Department of Biology & Biochemistry here at the University suggests that another related protein, beta-synuclein,

politics comment 8

Green Party leader addresses students

e pag The dangers of derailing arguments

Following Natalie Bennet’s talk on the case for an alternative politics for the UK, Deputy Editor-in-Chief Tomos Evans catches up with the Green Party’s leader at an event organised by Bath’s postgraduate group, IREP.

Thomas Gane talks about the importance of solidarity when trying to win an argument, and why he feels that the left wing have so many problems when it comes to arguing online.

e pag

would be able to regulate alpha-synuclein, a mechanism that could lead to the development of new forms of treatment. Projects are now based on studying this mechanism in depth, and are funded by Alzheimer’s Research UK. Both research projects have been celebrated for their quality, with the Irosustat paper being awarded ‘very important paper’ classification by the Medicinal Chemistry Journal ChemMedChem, as well as the findings on dementia being published in the journal Molecular and Cellular Neuroscience. Such positive outcomes are seen as stepping-stones for the University’s research departments, who are now very confident in their ability to achieve results. The departments will continue to contribute to the University of Bath’s reputation as a top ranked research orientated university in the UK.

bite

es pag bite fashion, now back in style

8&9

This week, bite’s fashion page returns with knobs on. Abi Glencross explores the modern afﬁnity with trainers, and Natasha Thompson reviews the launch of Fashion Bloodhound’s winter showcase.

Monday 18th November 2013

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Editorials

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Lest we forget the poppies R

ememberance day began three years after the end of the First World War - commemorating the day the armistice was signed and the, then Great War ended. The idea of using a poppy was initially inspired by “In Flander’s Field,” a poem by Colonel John McRae. The ﬁnal three lines: “If ye break faith with us who die/ We shall not sleep, though poppies grow/ In Flanders’ Fields” summarises the whole idea of the appeal - remembrance of the men who gave their lives and, additionally, to give aid to their grieving or struggling families who have had to carry on without them. This carried on for years afterwards and, as the Second World War came and went, and the Korean War did, too, the poppy became the symbol for remembering any person who had died during wartime. As the wars piled up, the poppy still stood

tall. As such, even today, people pay their respects to fallen soldiers every November the 11th. As the years and decades have passed, the poppy has managed to develop other meanings to some people. To some, it is a political tool, used to try and show the general public that under the cold, bureaucratic reptilian exteriors, the party in question are also real people who feel for the losses of war (try and ﬁnd a politician who doesn’t wear one). Others feel that deaths as a result of less-than-just wars have been wrongly grouped into the same appeal, in order to try and ‘justify’ these modern wars in some sense. Veterans of previous wars have said in the last few years, that “The Poppy Appeal is once again subverting Armistice Day. A day that should be about peace and remembrance is turned into a month-long drum roll of support

for current wars.” This is one of the most prevalent complaints about the Poppy Appeal, but there seems to be a very colourful and wide spectrum of opinions on it, many with ideas on the politics behind it. People have even begun to refuse to wear poppies as they don’t agree with the political reasoning behind the wars in which people have died. For example, it is understandable not to wear a poppy if you disagree with the recent conﬂicts in Iraq and Afghanistan. Though the point people like this are making is made abundantly clear on their opinions of current wars, here at bathimpact, we’d like to say this: Why does there have to be any assessment on the politics of the poppy and why is it constantly a talkingtopic that comes around every single year without fail? Can we not all just rally behind the idea that all wars are terrible, irrespective of their reasons,

and that the mass deaths in them are awful, irrespective of whether the soldiers were fighting for the right cause? We at bathimpact believe that when it comes to paying respects to those who have tragically had their lives stolen from them in war - whatever the justification (or complete lack of thereof) for said war - should we not just pay respect for loss of life and leave it at that? Besides, the proceeds made by the Poppy Appeal go to giving aid to currently injured serving members of the armed forces, to Veterans and even to members of the families left behind by servicemen and women killed in action. Even if the war isn’t justified, surely helping the people affected by it is more than so? The families of the dead didn’t cause the war and the soldiers serving are merely doing their jobs, so why penalise them for something they have no control over?

der, bought multiple houses - role models, undeniably - and as such, they are better than us. They are superhumans and can do no wrong, which is good, so we’re told by The Sun, because we plebs need to be ruled by someone who has lived a pure life, that they may instil order upon the masses. Before we get too sarcastic, however, let’s look at the other side. Isn’t it awful when it turns out politicians are real people? When they make mistakes? We’ve been reliably told by the BBC what a terrible person Rob Ford, Mayor of Toronto is, because he smoked some crack once. If you take every person who has ever smoked crack and tarnish them with that brush, you are not only demonising a number of people who you neither know nor reserve the right to judge, but you are also implying that you, as an individual, has never done anything which could be frowned upon by another person. By painting the ruling characters

of the country as the spawn of Satan, we are ﬂooded with harmful subjectivities we may not personally hold which, as well as leading to political disengagement, are simply unnecessary. No human being is perfect, surely we’re better being governed by someone who is able to learn and develop based on mistakes they’ve made, as opposed to being told that the sun shines out of their backsides? A string of politicians past and present have admitted to cannabis use. David Cameron, the Prime Minister himself, has refused to deny claims made by newspapers in 2007 that he had used cannabis while at Eton. Most recently, although not relating to drug use, Labour MP Gloria de Piero asked the media to “call off the hunt” for topless pictures of her from when she was 15, saying that ‘No one should have to worry that something they did when they were young might prevent them from serving their community or

getting involved in politics at a local or national level’. Well Gloria, we at bathimpact agree with you. We struggle to understand why someone’s past, which is integral to who they are, should be whipped up into such an issue. If they had committed a major crime, then yes, there is a question over their ability to represent their community, but something like a topless photo, or indeed smoking a joint, who cares? Why the media insists on trying to whip up hysteria over these things baffles us. Don’t we all want politicians who have had lives? ‘Career politicians’ are constantly criticised, yet whenever a politician has done something ‘wrong’ in their teens, suddenly the Daily Mail is there being a dick about it. The stench of hypocrisy is suffocating. bathimpact hopes that the recent events, the minor ones at least, are the final nails in the coffin for trying to making mountain out of a molehill from of politician’s pasts. We won’t hold our breath, though.

of power. With regard to grammar schools, proposals to create a more level playing ﬁeld include offering free test preparation to all candidates and creating more varied exams each year to prevent private tutors and prep schools from ‘guessing the content’. At bathimpact we applaud the former notion of test preparation for all children who take the 11+ exam. Access to learning opportunities should be equal for all. The latter idea mentioned, however, gives us some cause for concern. Whilst wellintentioned in principal, we fear that such a measure might have adverse consequences for all candidates and would probably not produce the intended results. Members of the editorial team can recall receiving coaching to sit the 11+ exam and others like it. The additional tuition was indeed tailored to the exam, which was in turn based partly around the national cur-

riculum and partly around what an 11 year old could reasonably be expected to know. There was thus very little ‘guesswork’ to be done on what was in the exam, as it derived from two relatively small bodies of knowledge. Changing the content of the 11+ to prevent advanced preparation would thus, in practical terms, mean a departure from the capabilities of a year 6 pupil and an increase in the overall difﬁculty of the exam. This seems inherently regressive as, even though it would handicap all candidates irrespective of background, those who receive additional coaching would still stand a much better chance of being able to tackle the more difﬁcult questions in areas such as verbal and non-verbal reasoning. The methods of private tuition might change, but the results would most likely not. The core of the issue is that parents want the best for their children;

if they have the money to pay for extra tuition, then pay they will. At bathimpact we believe that this is a genuine and well-meaning human intention, and thus attempts to prevent parents from investing in their children’s futures are misguided. In the same sphere, however, there seems to be a problem of fairness when it comes to selective schools; children from higher socioeconomic backgrounds (who would have had ﬁnancial access to extra tuition) are more likely to be ﬁnancially able and socially expected to go to private schools, and thereby receive superior tuition. From an educational perspective, we don’t think a child’s social background should not impede their access to a good education. The question that has to be answered, then, is not ‘How can we stop rich families doing well?’ but ‘How can we help poor families to do better?’

Politicians are humans too T

he Toronto Mayor and his apparently ‘dark’ past has surfaced multiple times over the past few weeks due to his now infamous antics of smoking crack. Now, Mayor Rob Ford - affectionately known as Mayor McCrack - is in even more trouble as he has in a ﬁt of drunken rage, threatened to murder someone. While we at bathimpact do not in any way condone his actions - especially now that even more questionable past convictions and actions have surfaced - we are somewhat surprised by the double standards that are trickling through in the hubbub around us. The international media supergroups push, constantly, an agenda of gloriﬁcation with reference to our gracious overlords. Be they Prime Ministers, Mayors, Presidents or Chancellors; those who govern the way we live our tiny lives are constantly shown to us as superior. They have risen through the ranks of poverty, climbed the political lad-

Let the plebs in, pretty please T

he issue of selective schools has once again reared its head, thanks to a report published by the Sutton Trust, which calls for an end to the culture of ‘coaching’ pupils for the 11+ entrance exam. The educational charity argues that children from poorer families make up a disproportionately low number of students at grammar schools. Without doubt, selective schooling is a major contributing factor to social inequality, as are private education and tuition. The situation is such that even former Conservative Prime Minister, Sir John Major, has spoken out against the lack of social mobility in modern society and the hegemony of a privately-educated middle class elite. Even David Cameron has been forced to echo his predecessor’s comments and admit that society needs to do more to assist those from more diverse backgrounds to reach positions

The bathimpact team Simon Rushton Editor-in-Chief impact-editor@bath.ac.uk

Tomos Evans Deputy Editor-in-Chief impact-deputy@bath.ac.uk

Ben Hooper bite Editor impact-bite@bath.ac.uk

Helen Edworthy News and Comment Editor impact-news@bath.ac.uk

Tom Ash Features Editor impact-features@bath.ac.uk

Connor McGregor Morton Sport Editor impact-sport@bath.ac.uk

Pedro Gomes Photography Editor impact-photo@bath.ac.uk

Gemma Isherwood Online Editor impact-it@bath.ac.uk

Poppy Peake Publicity Ofﬁcer impact-publicity@bath.ac.uk

Gabriela Georgieva Design Editor impact-design@bath.ac.uk

Elliott Campbell Media Ofﬁcer su-media-ofﬁcer@bath.ac.uk

Advertising Enquires Helen Freeman H.Freeman@bath.ac.uk 01225 386806

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The opinions expressed in bathimpact are not necessarily those of the bathimpact editors nor of the University of Bath Students’ Union. Whilst every effort is made to ensure that the information contained in this publication is correct and accurate at the time of going to print, the publisher cannot accept any liability for information which is later altered or incorrect. bathimpact as a publication adheres to the Press Complaints Commission’s Code of Conduct. Please contact them for any information.

Monday 18th November 2013

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expressimpact

In my 35 years of involvement in children’s services, I’ve never come across a case that could even be compared to this one.

“

Professor Nick Frost, chairman of Bradford Safeguarding Children Board, on the review of the death of four-year-old Hamzah Khan.

photo of the fortnight

“

The second instalment of the massively popular Hunger Games trilogy, ‘Catching Fire’, has faced its world premiere, to rave reviews. On reprising her role, Jennifer Lawrence commented to The Telegraph that “It is absolutely amazing” for her to get the chance to continue playing the series’ heroine, Katniss Everdeen. The smash success of the first Hunger Games movie is said to have delivered more than $300 million in profits for Lionsgate.

Fortnight in figures

1790

2.5 million

tweets from @johnlewis, vs. the number of his tweets that are redirecting people back to @johnlewisretail. Perhaps the most polite man on twitter, Mr. Lewis is frequently mistaken for the department store chain – but he’s been doing such a good job that John Lewis have decided to send him a free gift. The individual Mr John

fortnightly graphic

A pie chart depicting the total number of

updates & events UPCOMING EVENT Bath Christmas Market. Taking place in the centre of Bath, the market is made up of 120 individual stalls, with each one offering wonderful gift ideas and quality products. The stalls offer a variety of jewellery, crafts and locally produced food and drink. Where: Bath City Centre When: 28th November-15th December

NATIONAL University support staff and academics are to stage a second strike over pay increases, according to Unison, the University and College Union and Unite. The unions have restated that there was a 13 per cent real turns wage cut since 2008. The plan for the second strike includes the addition of the Educational Institute of Scotland.

INTERNATIONAL The Philippines has been hit by the huge storm named Typhoon Haiyan, which has affected 11 million people. The Philippine government has stated that it is now facing the biggest logistical challenge since its inception, with aid slowly beginning to arrive in the worst affected areas. Food aid is being transported by US military aircraft, and to outlying areas by helicopter.

LOCAL

The number of evacuation centres set up to help

The number of people in need of food aid due to Typhoon Haiyan

News Lite

Lewis is in fact an adjunct professor of computer science at Virginia Tech.

MP for Bath Don Foster has defended his vote in favour of the ‘bedroom tax’, a controversial welfare reform which will require people to pay higher taxes if their house is deemed to have a ‘spare bedroom’. Mr Foster defended his stance, stating that “Everyone is aware that savings were needed due to the economic mess.”

EDUCATION Research into the socio-economic backgrounds of university students has found that richer teenagers are three times more likely to go to top universities than those deemed working class, despite having the same grades. However, it was found that the access gap is less pronounced in England than in either the United States or Australia.

UPCOMING EVENT Why we are campaigning for fair pay. Trade unions with representation on campus are holding an open question and answer session for students to explain their reasons for previous and upcoming strike action Where: 3E 2.1 When: 1:15 pm, 2nd December

Monday 18th November 2013

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Jess Elliott bathimpact Contributor recent study has highlighted concerns that online advertisements encourage drinking amongst young people. The research, carried out by University of Bath Professor, Christine Griffin along with other researchers from New Zealand, involved 141 young people between the ages of 18 and 25. It aimed to investigate the link between social media and the drinking habits of participants. The study was commissioned after an increase was observed in young people using social media sites to tell ‘drinking stories’ through photographs and comments. It was found that Facebook, the most prominent social networking site, is extremely important in the period before drinking, the actual drinking itself, and after drinking. The sharing of photos was seen to be particularly important. Overall, the study concluded that a strongly ‘proalcohol’ profile on Facebook was ‘generally seen as a positive thing’. Young people seemed to be overly concerned with how their online profiles would appear to their peers.

With social media being so important in the lives of young adults, it is feared that the increase in advertisements on these sites are no longer viewed for what they are; marketing ploys. The study claims that many participants only viewed adverts in the sidebar as advertisement content; rarely recognising that Facebook groups for specific clubs and bars are also promotional and intended to increase custom. Notifications from these sites were viewed as informative and useful, and tended to influence choices in drinking. One of the main fears described by the researchers is that public spending on safer drinking initiatives is decreasing, whilst the spending of alcohol companies on advertisements is increasing. According to the report published by the University’s Institute for Policy Research, ‘large alcohol companies have invested heavily in digital marketing in recent years, far more than the money spent on safe drinking measures’. It has been claimed that this may be one of the reasons for the increase in binge drinking amongst young people. Recommendations have been made by this report for the regulation

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Shared photos and shared bingeing

The role of facebook has been found to encourage youth drinking

of online alcohol marketing, as well as further alcohol awareness campaigns. It is claimed by Professor Griffin that ‘current attempts at health promotion are outmoded’, and that other strategies are required. She suggests that the same social media and mobile technologies that advertisements are placed on should be used to counteract their effects, targeting the ‘cultural norm of drinking to intoxication’. The findings of this report were presented to an all-party parliamentary group on alcohol misuse last Wednesday, after Professor Griffin was invited to address the MPs by the charity Alcohol Concern. Further research into this topic is planned to continue from October 2014. University of Bath PhD students are set to look at the impact of digital alcohol marketing on young people in the UK, supported by Professors Christine Griffin (Department of Psychology) and Anna Gilmore (Department of Health). This research will be in collaboration with the UK Centre for Tobacco and Alcohol Studies (UKCTAS), which is a partnership of universities working on research into tobacco and alcohol related issues.

Higher Education Online courses gain traction funding woes Nick West bathimpact Contributor

Building on their May 2013 report, Universities UK, have published a further report entitled ‘The Funding Environment for Universities: An Assessment,’. The report was commissioned by Universities UK from the Institute for Fiscal Studies, PriceWaterhouseCoopers and Demos. The report has determined that in the medium term, the Higher Education sector is facing strong financial pressures. It also examines the challenges faced by this sector and, in more detail, covers the funding challenges for English universities and the government, but also internationally. Based on this, NUS Vice President for Higher Education, Rachel Wenstone has called into question the funding reforms introduced by the current government, which saw the tuition fee cap raised to £9,000 per year. Ms Wenstone specifically questioned ‘how much money has really been saved and the sustainability of the system.’ ‘This report shows just how complex and opaque funding for higher education has become under this government... Student loans are adding tens of thousands of pounds to students’ debts [and] billions to the national debt which will cost us all more for decades to come.’ The basic suggestions for future funding approaches were warmly received, but Ms Wen-

stone again warned that ‘turning once again to fees and loans as a silver bullet will only lead to much bigger problems down the line.’ The NUS has long been a staunch opponent of the newly increased tuition fees and organised student protests when they were first announced. Since they were introduced, the new £9,000 fees have been adopted by a third of English universities, including the University of Bath, despite the government’s claims that it would allow the universities to act as a free market to minimise costs for student. The key findings of the study were that, while increased income from the new fees regime could cover ongoing costs of provision, additional capital and infrastructure would be required if the UK is to continue to provide a ‘worldclass student experience’. There are also concerns that ‘public sources of funding are significantly constrained in their ability to support increases in student numbers,’ citing several cuts that have been necessary in the Department of Business, Innovation and Skills. The long-term suitability of the loan system with increased numbers was questioned, along with the models other countries have adopted, such as using private sources of funding to sustain high tertiary educational expenditure and any problems these models have. The report discussed above can be found at universitiesuk. ac.uk

The University of London's International Programme's four online courses, which provide distance learning degrees, have proved very popular, with over 200,000 students signing up in the first year. The so called ‘MOOC’s (massive open online courses) are offered for free via the US-based Coursera network. With over 200,000 students signing up, which is about four times the number of conventional students studying with the University of London’s International Programmes, the demand for higher education is well reflected. Among these, 90,000 were categorised as 'active', meaning they participated in one of the courses offered, which included computer programming, law, malicious software and the use of photography. The courses, which have no entry requirements, have a high drop-out rate; fewer than 1 in 20 (just 8,843) of the students that signed up completed the course and achieved a 'Statement of Accomplishment'. Despite this, director of academic development Mike Kerrison described the experiment as 'very successful'. He added that 'the number of students engaging in the course materials is considerable'. Moreover, 91 per cent of students rated their involvement with The University of London's International Programme's MOOCs as good, very good or excellent. The University of London's International Programme has been providing distance learning courses since the 19th century, and last year became one of the UK's first institutions to offer degree courses via the internet. Previously, this was largely an American phenomenon, with in-

Sage Ross

Madelaine Winn bathimpact Contributor

stitutions including Harvard, MIT and Stanford creating online platforms such as Coursera and edX. Coursera, established by Stanford and backed by venture capital, signed up more than four million students in its first 18 months, and provides courses from more than 80 universities. This autumn saw the UK taking a step into the rapidly growing onlinebased university market, with the launch of Futurelearn, a UK online university partnership. There are 21 UK universities participating, including Reading, Bristol, Leeds, Nottingham and Sheffield. Futurelearn have recently extended the number courses on offer, so January will see the total rise to 29 courses. Among these is the University of Birmingham's 'Shakespeare's Hamlet: text, performance and culture', and Southampton University's 'Exploring our

Oceans'. Futurelearn has an international market, attracting students from 190 countries worldwide. Moreover, five of their pilot courses have reached their planned quotas. Therefore, the chief executive, Simon Nelson, said that the response in the first term had “exceeded all our expectations”. According to Universities Minister David Willetts, these flexible, Internet based courses could “revolutionise conventional models of formal education”. Speaking at the British Library, Willetts explained that access higher education was not necessarily concerned with “bricks and mortar”. Mr Bear, from the Open University, said: “time and again we have seen the disruptive impact the internet can have on industries - driving innovation and enhancing the customer experience. I have no doubt MOOCs will do the same for education”.

Monday 18th November 2013

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Comment

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Anthony Masters bathimpact Contributor ussell Brand has recently been the guest editor of the New Statesman, and used a Newsnight interview with Jeremy Paxman to call for a revolution. My major surprise was not the interview or Brand’s views themselves, but the lavish praise from clever colleagues over Brand’s intelligence and passion. Many songs from Brand’s clarion are simply false. Brand declares: “I say profit is a filthy word, because wherever there is profit, there is also deficit”. Profits are made when the sale of goods or services exceed the costs of providing those goods or services. Profit results from income being greater than expenditure – it is the creation of wealth. Consequently, losses are the destruction of wealth. If Brand’s assertion were true, economic growth would be impossible. Brand says there are “things you shouldn’t do”, that a political system “shouldn’t destroy the planet, shouldn’t create massive economic disparity, shouldn’t ignore the needs of the people”. Without elections or democratic engagement, a “centralised administrative system” called the “Admin Bods” would be unable to understand “the needs of the people”, let alone fulfil them. Whilst Brand and other quasirevolutionaries complain about

the ‘massive economic disparity’, between the haves and the haveyachts, nearly 1 billion people have been lifted out of extreme poverty in 20 years. The First UN Millennium Development Goal has been achieved early. Global measures of inequality, such as the populationweighted Global Gini Index, hit a peak in 2000 but are now subsiding. Professor Antony Davies of George Mason University notes that: “Countries that are more economically free also have more equitable income distributions”. This is because, in economically freer countries, the ability to create wealth is less entangled with political power than in countries with many economic restrictions. Indeed, Brand’s system would invest terrifying power in this centralised administration to levy heavy taxes and enact ‘massive redistribution of wealth’. Economic growth can have positive effects on the environment, too. Emma Duncan of The Economist has promoted the view that wealthier nations, better governed, can afford conversation - such as cleaning rivers, preventing smoky emissions and protecting forests. Technological advancement means the rapacious demand for simple fuel like wood is stunted. Population growth slows in wealthier nations. People, comfortable in

Holly Narey bathimpact Contributor t’s getting tiring, isn’t it? This constant stream of stories about the objectification of women, of alcohol and a certain type of environment leading to a certain type of behaviour. Despite volunteering to write about this topic, actually sitting down to write it just served to make me weary. I’m sure that most of you will have heard of Tequila UK, who to the horror of Leeds students (and later the whole country) have been promoting various nights using the theme of sexual assault, not even thinly disguised as something a little less seedy; the night itself was named ‘Freshers Violation’. This company had been advertising club nights using unimaginative slogans such as ‘come and swallow’, accompanied by pretty offensive posters. Complaints about the nights had previously been submitted on Facebook and were either ignored or publicly derided (one protestor was told that their anger was the result of them ‘not getting any’), but the shit really hit the fan when a promotional video was posted on YouTube where men in attendance at the night in question were asked how exactly they intended to 'violate a fresher”. Highlights (lowlights?) included “I’m going to fist them in the arse” and “she’s going to get raped”.

These are probably not bad people. It’s insane to write somebody off for something that they said when drunk and egged-on. These men and women, mostly fresh from home and under-21 - some of them taking their first steps into nightclubs and student drinking culture - are being told that this is an acceptable way to behave. In a recent article in the Guardian, an exbouncer described sexual harassment as ‘endemic’, and spoke about how there just isn’t the staff or motivation venues to tackle it. Some girls have described stories where they complain about the behaviour of a certain man, get told not to make a fuss, and are then thrown out when they try to push him away later. In every city you will see the same thing to varying degree; for example, there’s a club in Glasgow that has with a two-way mirror to allow men to watch women at the sinks. Things go along until somebody suddenly realises that it might not be acceptable, at which point it can no longer just hide behind lad culture in the guise of being ‘all in good fun’. I’ve had enough of lad culture. Just because we’ve all been drinking doesn’t mean you can talk to me or touch me like that. We’ve all put up with it for years, laughing along or maybe having the occasional alcohol-fuelled shout at some sleaze who just stands and laughs, but there’s the dawning realisation that a lot of the behaviour of those

Kafuffle

The downfall of Brand’s revolution

living, can turn to environmental concerns. The Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change believes the best outcome to ameliorate climate change – the A1 scenario – is for rapid economic growth and the free trade of nascent and development low-carbon technologies. Lastly, revolutions where one

of the key goals is wealth egalitarianism have a poor historical record. The French Revolution got somewhat choppy – 17,000 were executed and 300,000 imprisoned in the Reign of Terror for ‘counterrevolutionary activities’. Under the USSR, 4 million Ukrainians starved in the Holodomor. Even nominally

democratic revolutions such as in Venezuela are plagued by severe human rights abuses. Brand is now being idolised for his views, but unjust sentiments are not the basis for a governing system. It shows that someone can have a big vocabulary but nothing worthwhile to say.

wikimediacommons

Lad culture & mundane misogyny

Certain every sexisms, such as catcalling, are taken for granted

using these excuses is not only disrespectful, but also criminal. Groping isn’t a joke; it is, by law, sexual assault - and so is grabbing or pinching somebody in a sexual way. I don’t know anybody who this hasn’t happened to, I can’t remember a night out when it hasn’t happened to me or one of my friends. So what can we do about it? Perhaps my friends and I could invest in some hairy tights from China, or a RapeX, the manytoothed anti-rape device inserted into the vagina and made in South Africa (Snopes has classified this as ‘partly true’ as it appears to exist but has never put into production). Or maybe we could pledge money to the crowd-funding website Indiegogo to secure the swift purchase of some anti-rape underwear (near-impossible for anyone but the wearer to remove) once they go into mass production. There is a market for avoiding assault. Maybe we should take a more progressive approach and really try to educate the people perpetrating these crimes, as well as focussing on the venues that refuse to put aside resources to take steps to prevent it. Hold venues accountable where this is a repeat problem. Educate both men and women - around 15% of men are also affected by sexual assault. Don’t just shrug it off when it happens to you; you deserve better than that.

Monday 18th November 2013

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The importance of iterative politics I

don’t think I really agree with most of the things that I’m about to write, but I think it’s a point to consider. If someone responds I might learn something - and learning things is good,unless it’s related to my degree in any way, shape or form. The reason for my internal conflict is that I’ve realised that I’m very left wing (like, set everything on fire and trade in beans and grain alcohol just to see what happens) whilst simultaneously absolutely hating the left wing. We’re whiny, we’re annoying and we’re never happy, but then I’m fine with that because I am personally all of these things. What’s recently been biting my free range and ethically reared goat is our constant bickering and in fighting that just needs to stop. You see it all the time on Facebook groups and social justice blogs, or, God forbid, real life conversations. There’s a word out of place or a sentiment expressed in the wrong way and the intelligent conversation is derailed for the next thirty minutes by people shouting and patronising each other. A recent example of this on Facebook resulted in one of the parties claiming that this was why they no longer believe in the feminist movement, which is clearly counterproductive. The argument was mostly unnecessary and was caused by a

misunderstanding rather than being due tot an ideological disagreement, but the jumping to conclusions and shouting turned the whole thing into a complete mess. Both sides had fair points and were essentially in agreement, but the reactions created a heated atmosphere when essentially a polite request for a bit more clarity and an apology for any misunderstanding or offence caused would have avoided the entire situation. We

don’t need to get up in arms over the little things between ourselves when we’re all really in it for the same reason – in most situations, at least. We all want to make things better, it’s just we can’t all know everything at once because it takes time to recognise the full extent of our privileges and internalised prejudices. You can’t just flick a switch and expect them all to go away; I constantly realise little things I used to do that were abso-

lutely shitty and I hate myself for it, and I’m sure in a month or two I’ll realise some of the things I did today are shitty too. It’s all iterative. Personal development, awareness, education, politics, they all take place gradually. We can’t expect to jump to a completed, all-encompassing super best friends ideology in one go, so we need to work together to take baby steps, because you know who’s really good at working together? The right wing. alexindigo

Thomas Gane bathimpact Contributor

One idea for the left wing might to be to learn how to settle their differences through pillow fighting

There is almost no logical reason for them being in power when you look at the extent of inequality in the world and the general selfishness of the Tories (think I’m being unfair? bite me). The right is very good at throwing a big hissy fit in unison to get what they want, even if they all hate each other and have different interests. Just look at the US shutdown; it was a ridiculous and petty thing by a bunch of over privileged wank stains, but it worked because money, arrogance and prejudice speak in a pretty universal language. I’m not saying we disregard certain issues or prioritise certain groups because that goes against the beautiful core of our beliefs, and it’s very important that we correct people when they say something prejudiced, harmful or triggering, but we need to figure out a better way to organise ourselves and resolve disputes. I think moving off the internet and into real politics or the streets (in a coherent, non-anonymous way) would help, simply because it’s so easy to be misunderstood online. Let’s have proper civilised discussions with corrections and retractions rather than fiery arguments that leave us too tired and pissed off to get together and throw some bricks at Tories (again, bite me). It’s iterative, it’s hard to work out and it takes time, but there’s no point having a nice idea if you have no means to use it for good.

About the pejoration of ‘feminism’ thomascrenshaw

Alexandra Egan bathimpact Contributor

hen I think of the word feminism, two images pop into my head; the first is admirable, a group storming parliament fighting for the ladies of the world in the quest for a better quality of life. The second is laughable; I see a group of women standing topless and burning their bras. How on earth is that supposed to bring about change? I just find this embarrassing and cringe worthy. Don’t get me wrong, I think the reason behind the toplessness and bra burning is a great one; in the end they are trying to ‘free’ women – or at least this is the intent. Being a woman myself, I can’t really say I believe that this is the best way to promote equality and empower women. I think this is part of the reason why the word ‘feminist’ has become taboo. I write this article claiming to be a feminist myself, but the fact is that I don’t want people thinking I’m some sort of butch, bra-burning, man-hating vampire. Even this past summer, Yahoo CEO, Marissa Mayer explained that while she believes in ‘equal rights’ and that ‘women are just as capable’ she thinks feminism itself is a ‘more negative word’. Starlet Katy Perry recently accepted the Billboard Woman of Year award, claiming that although she believes in the strength of women, she is ‘not a feminist’. Even Carla BruniSarkozy, France’s former first lady,

refuses to be associated with feminism claiming that she is ‘a bourgeois who loves family life’. This all actually makes them feminists - just not the bra-burning type. I think the problem is that people have become disillusioned with what feminism actually stands for. Internet trolls and misogynistic jibes have scared today’s women into thinking that feminism is in fact a taboo word. We are allowing small-minded, change-fearing people to create this idea that feminism is all negative – to the point where even the most successful women, who could in fact be the strongest advocates for feminism, appear to be against the revolutionary movement itself. The fact that they are successful women who stand for equality in the workplace, means that

they are feminists whether they like it or not. I think feminism can be expressed in different ways and mean different things. Certain ways, such as the bra burning, work for certain people (although count me out for standing topless in the freezing cold). Allie Rowbottom, University of Houston creative writing and doctoral candidate, came up with her own definition: ‘Feminism, for me, is a movement made up by multiple approaches and ideologies pointed at achieving equal social, economic, sexual and political rights for all, regardless of gender identity or biological sex.’ The end justifies the means, and that end is what all feminists are fighting for. But what about those girls that many look down on and claim go

against what feminism stands for? The stereotype of girls in skimpy dresses and high heels going on a night out and sleeping with a random guy they met at a bar or club have been deemed as ‘slutty’ and not at all feminist. Although I personally don’t really believe that getting wasted and sleeping with multiple people is a huge step forward for womankind, who am I to tell those girls they are wrong and that they go against everything any woman has ever fought for in their life? Just because woman A went and slept with man B after a couple of drinks doesn’t mean that the Suffragettes’ work all went to waste. As far as I’m concerned, girls like this still embody the true essence of feminism; freedom. Some of these girls may be insecure and attention

seeking, others may be strong, independent women. So who am I to judge them? Cue single ladies by Beyoncé. People have their own idea of what a feminist is and should be. Feminists don’t have to be women, for example. Just like if you were straight but supported gay rights. John Brougher, founder of MaleFeminists.com, believes that men play a crucial role in quashing sexism and gender inequality. So all those boys out there who like a strong woman, jump on the feminist bandwagon, and sing it loud and sing it proud. Sure, some feminists may be preaching Judith Butler, others may be cooking for the kids, some may be bringing home the bacon, and others may be stripping off their clothes. As long as that choice is their own and not someone else’s, as far as I am concerned that is freedom. And for me, freedom for women is the basis of feminism. Whilst it is interpreted and embodied in different ways, feminism is the way forward for the women of today. You just need to express it the way you want to. Unless you want to be a boring old conformist, that is. My feminist idols are the women I see around me working hard and making the most of their lives on a daily basis, not necessarily Michelle Obama. So let’s listen to good old Neil Armstrong, but add a feminist edge: one small step for a woman, a giant leap for womankind.

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Politics

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An evening with Natalie Bennett Tomos Evans Deputy Editor-in-Chief n 6th November, as part of the IREP post-graduate organised series of talks, Natalie Bennett, leader of the Green Party of England and Wales, gave a lecture entitled ‘Is change possible? The potential for alternative politics in the UK’. The talk touched on all areas of modern British politics, with Bennett describing Prime Minister’s Questions as a weekly ‘exchange of pre-prepared jokes’. Green Party policy was also discussed, with Bennett proudly saying, “We want to re-nationalise the railways”. The audience was a mix of students and staff from the University along with some local party members who had made the trip up Bathwick Hill. Although the audience was generally friendly and receptive to Bennett’s talk, she was pressed on the cost of Green Party policies. Bennett explained how at the 2010 General Election the party had a fully costed manifesto for the first time in their history. It stood up to the scrutiny of Channel 4 News who on their examination failed to note any discrepancies so did not run a story, as it wasn’t ‘newsworthy’ in Bennett’s words.

It was clear from the talk that the Green Party has moved away from being a one-issue party. Discussion of the environment, although present, was overshadowed by questions on economic policy and the prospect of constitutional reform. It appeared as if a more confident Green Party, following the election of their first MP in 2010, is framing themselves as the progressive leftist party for England. Following the lecture, bathimpact had a brief chance to speak with Bennett: bathimpact: As you touched on young people and apathy earlier: how do you think we should get more young people involved by reconnecting their politics and activism into turning up at the ballot box every few years? NB: Well, I think starting with the long term it’s really important that we desperately need better political education in schools which is something that people pay lip-service to, but don’t really take seriously. We also need better political education outside of schools and that is available to people of all ages and there’s a lot of work to be done there. Secondly, political parties actually need to talk to young people, which,

by and large is not happening a lot at the moment, they need talk to people really. Thirdly we need more young politicians - people need to actually run for office. It’s not always easy but, be prepared to go “hell, I could do better than that, I’ll give it a go”. bathimpact: With energy bills in the news a lot at the moment, it’s a big worry for students. What would you do? How do your policies fit in with making energy cheaper for consumers? NB: As I said before, the key thing is the quality. For students we’re mostly talking about private rental accommodation and that’s some of the worst accommodation in terms of energy efficiency standards, so we need to create standards for private rental accommodation that force landlords to upgrade it. Energy conservation is the absolutely key area. The price of energy is not going to come down, that’s a fact. The only way we are going to lift people out of fuel poverty, students out of fuel poverty, which means you’re paying more than 10 per cent of your income on energy bills, is by ensuring that you need less energy to have a comfortable home. bathimpact: Your party supports a referendum on the UK’s

in 2013. Whilst some people see the Royal Family as being the world’s poshest benefit scroungers, they do pull their weight. They take part in 2,000 official engagements in the UK and overseas every year. The monarchy has also expanded into the hospitality sector, entertaining 70,000 people every year at garden parties and receptions at royal residences. Also, a total of 3,000 organisations list a member of the Royal Family as a patron or president. These organisations cover a massive range, from housing to hospitals, and now the Uni-

versity of Bath as well. The question, however, is whether this work is truly worth the £36.1 million given to the Royal Family last year? Not to mention the cost of the army and police guarding them, which makes the cost closer to £202.4 million. Nevertheless supporters of the monarchy argue that this cost would be the same even if we had an elected president. Additionally, the royalty brings in lots of money through tourism; the Telegraph claimed that the Royal Family generate £500 million in tourism every year. On the other

bathimpact

Green Party Leader addresses Bath students in lecture on campus

Natalie Bennett with bathimpact Deputy Editor Tomos Evans membership of the EU. While the think that’s a good thing because media are very slanted towards a the EU is there as really important no vote, do you think it is feasible foundational standard, it sets the that a pro-Europe vote could hap- standards for workers’ rights, sets pen if there were to be a referen- the standards for consumer rights dum?” - okay it didn’t do great on horse NB: It’s feasible and indeed, meat - but it can be done. It sets I’d say it’s the more likely out- environmental standards to make come. I didn’t get round to men- sure we meet environmental tartioning tonight that my accent gets and it sets the standard on comes from Australia. And I know human rights. The EU being there how hard it is - Australia has had as a foundation is really important many referendums, nearly all of and Britain needs to be part of it. which have fallen - how hard it is to get a significant major change You can find out more about which, let’s not beat around the all of IREP’s upcoming events bush, is what we’re talking about and speakers on their website: here, through in a referendum. I www.irepbath.eu

Mike Szweda bathimpact Contributor

is Royal Highness Prince Edward the Earl of Wessex, was named as the Chancellor of the University of Bath. The day of celebration saw his official installation at the Abbey, a demonstration in the STV and the official opening of the newly built Chancellors’ building. I had a brief chat with him at the official opening and, whilst he was polite and charming, it raised the question of whether he and the rest of the Royal Family have any purpose

NASA

What does the monarchy actually do? H hand, republicans claim that this would still be same figure if we deposed the Queen, because the palaces would still be there, but this wouldn’t be the case: the reason tourists love visiting the castles and palaces of England is because they are still functioning buildings and not just museums. There are several other arguments offered by the advocacy group Republic for saying goodbye to the Royal Family. They say “The monarchy is not only an unaccountable and expensive institution, unrepresentative of modern Britain; it also gives politicians almost limitless power.” It does this in a number of ways, such as the Royal Prerogative, which allows the Prime Minister to declare wars or sign treaties (amongst a few other things) without a vote in Parliament. Republic also argues that the monarchy is innately undemocratic; that it denies the people a basic right to elect their head of state and for every citizen to have the chance to hold that office. However, supporters of the monarchy argue that the Royal Family act only on the advice of Parliament rather than independently, and therefore they work in compliment rather than replacement of democracy. Also, ignoring any practical influence they may have on running the country, supporters argue that the royal family provides a focal point of unity and tradition. We are all brought

together under a non-political leader, avoiding the polarising effect that a political president would have. Some say though this focus on tradition has left the royal family with a strange family dynamic. Christopher Hitchens once described Prince Charles as ‘performing the only job allowed him by the hereditary principle: that of waiting for his mother to expire.’ Whether you think the royal family has a role or not in 2013, certain things that they say can be considered disconcerting. Examples of this include hearing that Prince Charles, future King, has been dubbed “No friend of Science” by Discover magazine. Popular science writer Simon Singh also wrote ‘we presented evidence [to Charles] that disputes the value of alternative medicine and despite this he hasn’t changed his mind… It’s a shame, because he’s so influential.’ Nobody however is currently considering overthrowing the monarchy. The International Monarchist League, chaired by UKIP candidate Count Nikolai Tolstoy, is there to support the principle of monarchy. This society claim ‘the interests of the Monarchist League lie far more in the future than in the past.’ Hence, if they have their way it’ll be difficult to see the monarchy’s position being diminished in the near future.

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Business

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Free trade - an assault on democracy? The proposed EU-US trade treaty could have unintended consequences

being conducted, and it has even been accused of being little more than an excuse to pander to the whims of rapacious corporates. In particular, there has been harsh criticism from internet freedom groups and other public interest activists over the opaque nature of negotiations regarding an agreement as significant as TTIP; there have been calls from several quarters for talks to be conducted in the public eye, in the European Parliament and in the American Congress, instead of behind closed doors where citizens cannot be privy to decision-making that will significantly alter their lives and perhaps even limit their freedom of expression, should some of the harsher copyright laws be passed. Dean Baker, head of the American Centre for Economic and Policy Research, warns that TTIP could allow powerful industry voices to dictate their own terms, by defining anything that impedes their profitability as a ‘trade barrier’, and having any governmental regulation that is inconvenient to them removed in this manner; he goes on to cite wide-ranging examples of potentially adverse effects that TTIP could have, from allowing genetically-modified foods to be imported and sold within the EU, to tightening copyright laws and impeding the

ﬂow of information on the internet, to granting the pharmaceutical industry longer patents and tighter control of medical prices. In a similar vein, author and political activist George Monbiot warns that TTIP could facilitate a shift in power away from citizens and democratic government towards corporate and industry forces. Calling TTIP ‘an assault on democracy’, Monbiot paints a chilling picture of a future where investor-state dispute settlement, a mechanism that allows businesses to sue foreign countries for breaching trade agreements, could be ex-

cheek and kissed her lips, I knew that all my rejections, all my ineptness with woman, was a thing of the past. Kissing turned to heavy petting, then to fumbling, before ﬁnally I was on top of her. “Wait” she said, “are you clean?” “What?” I

replied, a little insulted, “of course I am. Are you?” “I’m 97 per cent sure”, she told me convincingly. My reliance on her basic scientiﬁc analysis led to a short stint of chlamydia and weeks of antibiotics. She told me she was 97 per cent sure, although I seriously doubt she had any empirical data to back the claim up with, which meant that I was the unfortunate victim of her STD-riddled 3 per cent. As economists, we access risk; an irregularity which is never absent from anything we do. Even if I opened the only brewery in a town full of alcoholics, a seemingly riskless investment, there is a small risk that the alcoholics might – given some higher calling – spontaneously become Quakers. No matter how many times a policy has worked before, no matter where it is, risk is omnipresent. British philosopher Thomas Hobbes was aware of this. His approach to science was such that the study is the ‘knowledge of consequences and dependence of one fact upon another.’ We trust science, and we absolutely should; it is universal and based on intense rationality. We know, from our study of consequences, that an active hob will burn the hand, and

ploited by unethical companies to sue weakened European governments for putting citizen welfare before corporate proﬁt. Critics of the TTIP also believe that the resultant economic beneﬁts will mainly be in favour of large companies, and that the social, environmental and political disadvantages will far outweigh the paltry predicted economic gain of €545 a year to the average European citizen. Those who are in favour of the TTIP, however, have called these voices unnecessarily alarmist, and pointed out that the creation of the

transatlantic free-trade area would liberalize an enormous portion of the global economy, and serve as an incentive to increase competitiveness and global standards, in addition to accruing economic beneﬁts for everybody concerned. And so, even as the United States and Europe tentatively resume talks amidst tension over the fresh allegations regarding the American National Security agency spying on European leaders, the debate rages on amongst the public as to whether the TTIP is an economic catalyst, a tool of capitalistic oppression, or a combination of both. streitcouncil

Vishala Ramswami bathimpact Contributor he Transatlantic Trade and Investment Partnership (TTIP), is a proposition that is breath-taking in its economic ambition and scale: it champions the idea of a free trade area between the EU and USA, which will encompass all of the 820 million people who are resident in the world’s two largest economies, and who contribute nearly half of the global GDP. Not content with merely abolishing tariffs and creating the largest free trade area in world history, TTIP also seeks to cut bureaucratic red tape between both economies, curtail subsidies to state-owned businesses and, perhaps most controversially, modify laws relating to intellectual property and copyright. At ﬁrst glance, the beneﬁts of such a monumental partnership seem correspondingly colossal: The Centre for Economic Policy Research in London forecasts a potential yearly gain of €119 billion to the European economy and of $100 billion to the American economy, whilst the European Commission expects roughly 400,000 jobs to be created as a result of the deal. Yet, TTIP has encountered much anger and suspicion for the secretive, non-democratic nature in which talks regarding the deal are

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EconomicsEvidence of W

e lay on the beach for several hours, talking about where we had been and where we were going, the stars shining down on us. It was love at ﬁrst sight, I was sure of it. As I turned towards her, held her

Hobbes argued that even science requires an element of faith

through further learning we can even discover what aspect of heat causes this reaction. Despite this, there is always a risk. Hobbes reiterates that although we have formed rational assumptions through observation and ‘fact’, no science is absolutely certain and contains an element of faith. Although the hob has burnt hands continuously for hundreds of years, we cannot be certain that tomorrow it won’t. All we can do is assume through the overwhelming observations of singed hands. There is that tiny, almost invisible risk that still occurs. Follow me? Science today remains risky. With the amount of medicine we consume, chemicals we put into our bodies and manufactured goods we use, it is not 100 per cent certain they are good for us. Despite this, we believe the negative risk is minimum as ‘observation’ has deemed them ‘safe’. If, however, you were told that by drinking Coca-Cola there was a 95 per cent chance that you would get cancer, you would probably assume that their proﬁts would dramatically decrease, in the same way that no one would invest in our brewery for Quakers; the risks are

simply too high. It is surprising, therefore, that – given the recent IPCC report which stated that scientists were 95 per cent sure that humans are worsening climate change – that humans are treating the risk with little concern. It is even more surprising that businesses seem even more reckless than policy leaders, with the related costs to infrastructure, migration and markets expected to reach into the trillions. We chose to take these risks perhaps, most convincingly, due to a lack of empathy and shortsightedness. We won’t feel the consequences soon enough to act and even when it does, we feel will be able to do something about it. The same goes for those who chose to smoke, the business which decides tell white-lies to investors or the idiot who has unprotected sex. I often think back to that night on the beach and ask myself “would I do it again?” If, and it’s a big if, her statistic were correct, I almost deﬁnitely would. Why? Because every single thing we do in the world is a risk, be it science, gambling or ﬁnance. The only question we should ask ourselves is whether we will land on the right side.

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Science

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Filling the UK’s energy shortfall Camille Kanaoya bathimpact Contributor urning on the lights, charging a laptop or fueling a car are made possible by the energy produced in this country, and this is something we tend to take for granted. But it seems this ‘stable’ state of energy supply is reaching its limits. Blackouts are becoming increasingly common, and this trend doesn’t seem likely to abate in the near future, as the Royal Academy of Engineering (RAE) writes in an alarming statement on the British energy crisis. The United Kingdom alone consumed 234 million tons of energy in 2008; this is the equivalent of a traveling 10 hours on a Boeing 747, 2.2 million times. Energy sources

sludgegulper

How can renewables help Britain avoid blackouts in the future?

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The United Kingdom alone consumed 234 million tons of energy in 2008

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are diverse in the UK, with gas being the predominant source. However, with the North Sea offshore platform expected to run out of gas by 2017, it is not impossible to believe that consumers will need to start looking at alternatives to fuel

Other EU countries like Sweden have embraced renewables and satisfy its shareholders. The their daily electrical activities. Although the RAE states black- solution therefore lies in providing outs are unlikely to occur as cur- incentives for such companies to rent demands in electricity are continue supplying. The situation, however, is not relatively stable, the major issue lies in the fact that the energy sec- easy. With the European Union detor in Britain is entirely privatised, manding that countries cut down on with multinationals such as BP and their carbon footprint, the incentive National Grid operating the supply. is to look outside of the fossil fuel Although electricity is a necessity in sector. And the only alternative that daily life, energy corporations have provides clean and environmentalno legal obligations to keep lights ly friendly energy is renewables; in on. As gas is becoming scarcer and fact the Cameron administration MPs want to keep the cost of elec- has promised a massive increase in tricity at the same rate, companies energy supply from the renewable have no choice but to decommis- sector to 31 per cent of the UK’s tosion and shut down to avoid los- tal energy production by 2020. Ening business. After all, the main ergy experts say it is achievable, but purpose of an energy ﬁrm is not to it will require not just a transformasupply energy but to reap proﬁts tion in technology, but in political,

economic and industrial thinking. Furthermore, given the current technology, renewables will not be able to achieve the power of 2.7 Peta Watt hours (1015) that people consume in the UK. For instance, Britain receives on average 231 Giga Watt hours (109) of power from the sun every year; this means that the amount of power the sun supplies in a year is still off by a factor of a million compared to the required target. The next alternative is wind power. The UK is one of the besplaced countries to receive wind; in 2012, just from existing energy turbines, Britain created 19.4 Tera Watt hours (1012) of wind power. Whilst this number is impressive, it is still far from the desired goal by a factor of 1000. Another major problem with this energy source is that once energy is taken in from the sun or winds, it cannot be stored and must be used almost immediately. As demands for electricity are cyclic, with peaks in the mornings and evenings, it will not be sufﬁcient to cover the consumers’ needs. Although MPs see a future in renewables, even if they are fully installed by the promised deadline of 2020, blackouts still remain a threat. To satisfy EU environmental regulations and energy demands, politicians will need to look at developing nuclear power plants. In response to the oil crisis of 1973,

their French counterparts made a great change in becoming self-sufﬁcient suppliers of energy by pulling away from fossil fuels and heavily investing in nuclear. Today, 78 per cent of France’s energy supply originates from nuclear power stations, making it the second largest producer of this energy source. While research continues to maintain nuclear energy production sustainable, the country no longer heavily relies on petroleum imports. The nuclear proﬁle in the UK however, remains extremely doubtful. Currently, 19 per cent of Britain’s total energy supply comes from nuclear power and this number has decreased in recent years; follow-

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78 per cent of France’s energy supply originates from nuclear power stations

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ing the Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant meltdown in March 2011, energy experts in the UK raised concerns on the safety of power stations in Britain and whether or not it is sustainable in the long run. This, in summary, is the current energy situation in the UK: uncertain, troubling and in need of urgent thought and innovation.

Prof Science - Gripes about gulls Why are so many seagulls taking up residence in our ‘costal’ Bath? D

Dear keen-eyed ornithologist, you are quite right; gulls love the city of Bath. In fact, they started moving to the city in the 1940s, and over 1,000 breeding pairs as of this year have taken up permanent residence on the rooftops, especially around the city centre. When you first see them elegantly cross the blue skies and hear their distinctive call, you might be reminded of beautiful seaside summer holiday memories. I mean, they are as much

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they are as much part of a beach holiday as sandcastles and ice cream

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part of a beach holiday as sandcastles and ice cream. But wait for the summer when they flock

together and do a fly-by over all parts of the city to greet the day with cacophonous screeching at 4am. Coastal gull populations are on the decline, so much so that some gulls are protected species. This makes it illegal to intentionally injure or kill any gull, or damage or destroy eggs or active nests. Technically there is no such thing as a ‘seagull’. There are several different species in the gull family Laridae. In Bath you will mostly find large species of gulls, such as the plentiful herring gull and the rather rare lesser blackbacked gull. Both are protected as threatened or declining species (check out rspb.org.uk for more info on gulls and other birds). While on decline in the coastal regions, urban gull populations clearly seem to flourish. It is not known exactly what prompted the move to the city, but gulls are very intelligent and resourceful birds, able to adapt and take advantage of any opportunity. In the ‘wild’, they nest on sea cliffs in order to be close to their food supply. They often scavenge for offal behind fishing trawlers. But this life-style has become increasingly tough as the commercial fishing industry changed their practices to reduce waste. This cuts a vital

food resource. Moving to the city provides the gulls with abundant inland sources of food and safe, predator-free nesting sites on rooftops. They exploit the waste that we produce and that accumulates in the streets and on landfill

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Moving to the city provides the gulls with abundant inland sources of food

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sites. Councils across the country have spent thousands upon thousands of pounds to try and control the growing population. Besides being noisy neighbours, they also have no respect or sense for art and cause a lot of damage to buildings, historic or modern, and sights. Being several times bigger than a pigeon, which are also notorious city destroyers with their acidic poop, you can imagine that gull excrements can quickly turn a town, quite literally, into a massive pile of shit. They also like to take bin bags apart to scavenge for leftovers, scattering the contents in the streets. Hawks and owls, fake and real,

have been brought in to deter the gulls. Wires and nets cover buildings, signs and lampposts. And the gulls just sit there and laugh at us. Or, for lack of other resting places, sit on your car and do the take-off poop on your freshly washed wind-screen. A cull is not really an option, as you can’t exactly send people out into the city with shotguns (although there have been many summer mornings when I really wanted to reach for mine, if I had one, and just let off a warning shot…). Poison is far too haphazard as a method for it

to be reliable, and you certainly do not want to upset Bathonians by killing their dearly beloved pets. Love the gulls or hate them, we will just have to learn to live with them. Take some time and watch them. They are fascinating birds: brave, adventurous and so clever. I have seen them sneaking up on people, swooping over their shoulder and stealing their sandwich to swallow it whole a few yards down the road. Happy birdwatching!

Darius N

ear Professor Science, I only recently moved to Bath and I have noticed that it also seems a very popular place for seagulls. Bath is not exactly a coastal city, so what’s up with that? - Charles

Eons ago, gulls may have decimated the dinosaur population

Monday 18th November 2013

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Chancellor’s Installati T

he 7th of November saw the installation of the University’s fifth Chancellor HRH Prince Edward, taking place in Bath Abbey. The start of the ceremony was marked with a procession through the centre of Bath, by a selection of dignitaries and councillors from Bath, officials from the Abbey, University and Students Union Staff, Honorary Graduates from the past 28 years, and the Vice-Chancellor and Chancellor at the back. The large procession, all dressed in ceremonial academic apparel, were welcomed into the Abbey by the University of Bath Chamber Choir and the Abbey’s organist. Once seated the congregation were welcomed by the Reverend Prebendary Edward Mason who reiterated the importance of the links between the University and the Abbey. He also discussed how the Abbey has housed some of the “greatest pioneers of art and science” since the Middle Ages. The congregation was then declared opened by the Pro-Chancellor and University Secretary. A procession including the ViceChancellor and the University Mace then left the stage to go and meet the Prince, from a side chapel. The procession joined by the Prince then paraded around the Abbey, passing the majority of the guests. The procession then reached the stage where the Chancellor affirmed that he would “at all times fulfil the duties of Chancellor [and] … uphold and maintain the rights and privileges of the University.” After a fanfare the Vice-Chancellor Professor Dame Glynis Breakwell said that this was a “truly momentous occasion of the University’s history” and that having a “Chancellor of His Royal Highness’ stature and standing … [was a] ref lection of the achievements of the staff and students over the last 47 years.” HRH Prince Edward was then presented with an honorary doctorate of law. After this presentation, the Prince thanked the Vice-Chancellor for her “kind words of welcome” and the University for his Honorary Degree. This was followed by rather humbly saying that he was “not worthy of either”. He continued to say that earlier that morning the “realisation of what [he] had taken on had dawned on [him]” and that he had always considered Chancellors to be “senior and distinguished” which he didn’t see himself as either. Finally he declared that he was “excited about being a part of such a dynamic and ambitious University” and he looked forward to getting to know the staff and the students. In his first duty as Chancellor Prince Edward was required to present two more honorary degrees, firstly to the Right Reverend Peter Price, the former Bishop of Bath and Wells, and British Paralympic Swimmer and holder of multiple world records Ellie Simmonds OBE.

Photos by Penelope Louise Bielckus

The Chancellor then closed the congregation and the procession returned to the Guildhall, before departing for lunch and the Open House in the STV.

T H a B n T i v H e s

T f t t o j

A t b t s s c m i g i c

F S a s r p ‘ o i t d p p a

A p t s a o s o ‘ c E o G c i

A h b t c h v p B a b t p o t c t i f

A U o a a f l a w w f a b

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Monday 18th November 2013

ion and Open House

STV, as another event in a series to welcome the University of Bath’s new Chancellor, His Royal Highness Prince Edward. Taking place on Thursday afternoon following the morning’s official installation of the University’s new Chancellor, the Open House was billed as having ‘handson exhibitions’ of Bath’s most recent research and student group performances.

Taking place in the STV’s sports hall and full with security and student volunteers to help run the event, the Open House featured many interesting stands from various University departments, with an adjoining space for the student performances.

Across the venue, research exhibits from the University included a table organised by the University of Bath Centre for Sustainable Chemical Technologies, who were showcasing their work into renewable resources and clean energy. The exhibit included an example of materials that can be mined for introducing into construction, in order for buildings to more sustainably generate their own power. Also included in this exhibit was a remote controlled car, powered by a biofuel combination.

From the department of Social and Policy Sciences was an exhibit entitled ‘Dead and Buried’, which featured different responses from young people about their relationship with natural burial and the phenomenon of death, with the tagline ‘critical engagement in a subject that is often deemed taboo’. The ‘Dead and Buried’ exhibit also featured research into the relationship between technology and death, with particular emphasis on a project which would potentially enable people visiting graves to view clips from a person’s life via their mobile devices.

As an example of the way different departments across the University work together, an exhibit provided by the Institute for Policy Research (IPR) showed a range of projects the University works on in order to inf luence various global issues. Providing various policy briefs, one of which included the IPR’s research into ‘Innovative political strategies of tobacco companies aimed at undermining UK and EU health policy’, based on the University of Bath’s own Tobacco Control Research Group and the ways in which tobacco companies gain access to policy elites in order to facilitate their own interests.

Also featured alongside the research exhibits were sports tasters including xbiking and their amazing biking simulator, netball, row your boat, and the gym challenge. As well as this, there was an exhibit for the ‘Bath Leap List’, who wowed visitors to the Open House with their programme of favourite places to go in Bath, as voted and added by students and alumni of the University as well as members of the public. The Leap List is intended to encourage people who have not previously lived in Bath to get the most of the city, providing a booklet alongside their app with different entertainment, culture, events, places to eat, and places to go to out and about around Bath. More information about the Leap List can be found at: facebook.com/bathleaplist.

Aside from research being done at the University, the Open House held a variety of performances from student societies and activities at Bath. This kicked off with a showcase from Gravity Vomit, and was followed by demonstrations from Trampolining, and then Breakdancing. After this, attendees to the Open House were graced with a performance from ChaOS. There was also an exhibition from Badminton, followed by performances by BodySoc and a martial arts display, and then rounded up by a performance from Ballroom Dancing.

Photos by Pedro Gomes

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Science

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Bath cancer drug in clinical trials Research at the University into the treatment of breast cancer

reast cancer is the most common form of cancer in the UK, affecting almost 50,000 British women each year. A woman’s breast is made up of fat, connective tissue and thousands of glands that produce milk. These glands are connected to the nipple through ducts that transport the milk for breastfeeding. When the cells forming these tissues start to multiply and grow out of control they become cancerous, forming tumours. There are different types of breast cancer depending on the tissue affected, and they can be invasive, if they can spread outside the breast tissues; or non-invasive, if they cannot. The causes of breast cancer are

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Hormone therapy is usually administered after treating the tumour with surgery and chemotherapy

es with age, especially over 50. Most breast cancers are not hereditary; however, there are several genes known to be involved in breast cancer development, such as the famous BRCA1 and 2. Women with denser breast tissue might also have a higher risk of developing breast cancer. Some types of breast cancer can be stimulated to grow by the female hormone oestrogen. A way to treat these kinds of cancers involves hormone therapy to reduce the levels of oestrogen in your body or to stop its effects. Hormone therapy is usually administered after treating the tumour with surgery and chemotherapy, but it may be given before to shrink the tumour, making it easier to remove. Hormone therapy is also administered to reduce the risk of the breast cancer coming back again. Oestrogen is produced by the enzyme aromatase, which catalyses the last steps of its synthesis. Drugs to block the aromatase’s activity, known as aromatase inhibitors, have been used to treat the variety of breast cancers that are stimulated by oestrogen. In recent years, a new oestrogen production pathway using a different enzyme, steroid sulfatase, has been identified. The production of oestrogens

Drugs like Arimidex could be used in tandem with Irosustat. by the steroid sulfatase enzyme forts have been made to develop seems to be much more active steroid sulfatase inhibitors. The and important in breast cancer Medicinal Chemistry Group here than by the aromatase one. Thus, at the University of Bath’s Departthe steroid sulfatase has become ment of Pharmacy & Pharmacolan attractive and novel target for ogy has designed and synthesised treatment in order to reduce oes- a steroid sulfatase inhibitor called trogen levels in breast cancer. Irosustat. The drug has been deSince the early 1990s, big ef- veloped by the pharmaceutical

company Ipsen, who acquired the Bath-Imperial college spin-out company Sterix Ltd co-founded by Professor Barry Potter from the University of Bath. Irosustat has already been tested in several clinical trials as a monotherapy (in isolation from other treatments). The new phase of clinical trials that is under way now will try to investigate whether blocking both enzymes at the same time (the aromatase and the steroid sulfatase) decreases even further the amount of oestrogen produced and therefore reduces or inhibits the progression of breast cancer. Women with breast cancer which is not responding to the aromatase inhibitor treatment will be recruited for this study from several UK hospitals. Developing a drug cost millions of pounds and takes a very long time. Therefore, the fact that a drug developed in Bath has made the clinical trials stage highlights the importance of the research carried out by the Department of Pharmacy and Pharmacology. Hopefully in the future this new drug will be transformed into a clinical treatment that will improve the recovery of thousands of women suffering from breast cancer.

faces such as door handles, bathroom taps, and computer keyboards can spread a virus onto many hands. One study of ‘social contact’ found that we have more social interactions on regular weekdays, compared with weekends and holidays. Significantly it correlated cold, dry weather with more ‘long duration’ social contacts of longer than an hour. Alas, all those long coffee breaks with friends are putting you at risk! Cold, wintery weather clearly has a lot to answer for where it comes to virus stability and person-to-person

sponse. Elderly people and infants have weaker immunity, and are much more likely to be hospitalised by viral attacks. There is not much evidence that cold weather itself affects the human immune response to viruses. However it is known that vitamin D deficiency can weaken the immune system, which can be a side-effect of a long, dark winter. Vitamin D is synthesized in your skin when it is exposed to the sun. Take this as an excuse to get out of the library once in a while and snatch every minute of sunlight outside that you can get!

Editor 182

Alberto Lapedriza bathimpact Contributor

Hazel Roberts bathimpact Contributor

rap up warm, or you’ll catch a cold!” my mother used to say. This has more than a whiff of an old-wives’ tale, as I have many times been under-dressed for the weather and not become ill. In fact, no scientist has convincingly proven that chilling the body can cause colds. This being said, there may be a grain of truth in the idea. Many epidemiological studies have associated wintery weather with the high incidence of ‘upper respiratory tract infections’. These include colds, largely caused by rhinoviruses; the flu, commonly caused by influenza A, and respiratory syncytial virus, which affects nearly all infants in their first three years of age. Seasonal virus outbreaks are not limited to the upper respiratory tract. The so-called ‘winter vomiting bug’ is actually a norovirus infecting the small intestine. One factor that links these disparate viruses, and the most likely reason for their seasonality, is the fact that they are most frequently transmitted via miniscule droplets in the air, called ‘aerosols’. We’ve all been in that situation when someone nearby coughs or sneezes without covering their face in time. It’s no good running or holding your breath, as these droplets can travel at 40 miles per hour and remain in the air for a considerable period of time. While norovirus does not

cause coughing or sneezing, the copious vomiting that it produces can leave highly contagious aerosols in the air. One notable case where a norovirus-infected woman vomited in a restaurant led to 90 per cent of the diners at her table, 70 per cent of diners at the next table, and 25 per cent of diners on the other side of the room, becoming infected. Be afraid... be very afraid. Scientists have found that low temperatures can significantly enhance the transmission of aerosolborne viruses, and relative humidity is also an important factor. One study with influenza-infected guinea-pigs showed that airborne virus transmission between the animals was more frequent at 5°C than 20°C and more favourable in drier air of only 20-35 per cent relative humidity. The airborne spread of influenza virus ceased at 30°C, or 80 per cent relative humidity. This reason for this is that cold and flu viruses are unstable at higher temperatures and become inactivated, which is why they thrive in the relatively cool environment of your airways. Humidity also affects airborne stability. Influenza virus is more stable in very dry air, whereas rhinovirus is more stable in very humid air (the difference being that influenza has a lipid ‘envelope’ and rhinovirus does not). Viral spread is also heavily influenced by an infected person’s number and duration of social interactions. Even without direct skin contact, the touching of shared sur-

transmission. However, your average reasonably healthy human is exposed to a large number of infectious agents without as much as a sniffle. We hold immunity to viruses that we’ve been infected with over the last couple of years, and can rapidly subdue any subsequent attacks before they gain a foothold. Over time, cold and flu viruses can mutate into strains that our bodies no longer recognise, which is why you are unlikely to completely avoid getting colds every winter. One final factor in the winter spread of viruses is the strength of your immune re-

James Gathanay

” Does cold weather make you ill? diverse and complex. The risk of developing breast cancer increas-

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Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

World

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Geneva nuclear talks fall through Attempts to agree over Iran’s nuclear programme have failed Sophie Sachrajda bathimpact Contributor

rom 7th to 9th November, influential foreign ministers met in Geneva to discuss Iran’s nuclear programme. In the lead up to the meetings both sides were optimistic yet cautious, hoping that a vital interim deal would be signed between Iran and the P5+1 (the five permanent members of the UN Security Council and Germany). Negotiators want Iran to take specific measures to stop development of its nuclear programme in

order to prevent it from creating nuclear weapons. These measures would be in exchange for a lifting of certain sanctions that have affected Iran’s banking and energy industries and crippled its economy in recent years. Key demands of the discussions held two weeks ago included the implementation of a comprehensive verification regime which would aim to reduce Iran’s uranium enrichment to 20 per cent as well as the introduction of other, unannounced checks. Ahead of the talks, ministers

Most of Iran’s energy needs are still met by thermal power plants

spoke positively about their aims for the discussions. A senior US administration official said that they hoped Tehran would be able to come to an ‘initial understanding that stops Iran’s nuclear programme from moving forward and rolls it back for the first time in decades’. On Thursday 7th November, Iranian Foreign Minister Mohammad Javad Zarif said that the government was willing to participate in discussions and that it was their policy to ‘refrain from seeking nuclear weapons’. Throughout the talks, Iranian state broadcaster IRIB was optimistic in its news reports, stating that the atmosphere in Geneva was positive and that “Iran and the West are narrowing the gaps and paving the ground for signing an agreement that can put an end to Iran’s perennial nuclear problem.” However, despite all of this optimism, after three days talks stalled and at the last moment no deal could be reached. There was only the agreement to meet again on the 20th of November at a lower level. So how did talks move so quickly from positive to negative? Very few details of the talks have been revealed, however it seems that blame has been placed

on two culprits: the French and the Iranians. It appears that in the final stages of the third day, France pulled back. French Foreign Minister, Laurent Fabius was concerned about certain issues, such as the fate of the uranium that Iran has already amassed. The majority of statements have denied any such division within

the Western camp. US Secretary of State John Kerry said that France was on board with all negotiations and pointed the finger at Iran. Speaking in the United Arab Emirates, he said that the Iranian government simply “couldn’t take it at that particular moment”. It seems that if any final agreement between Iran and the P5+1 is to be made, then the uncertainties that exist about Iran’s past must be clarified and a better level of cooperation needs to be achieved. Having said this, ministers from all the countries involved are

claiming that important progress was made during the talks and that they are optimistic about the future. EU foreign policy chief Catherine Ashton, as well as British foreign secretary William Hague noted that there had been ‘concrete progress’ throughout the talks. Mark Hibbs, a nuclear expert at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace in Berlin has stated that the result seen in Geneva should not be seen as a ‘fiasco’. He believes that the pace at which the talks had been developing made several of the Western countries uneasy and so giving countries an extra ten days to reflect on negotiations ‘could be very helpful’. It would be easy to call these three-day negotiations a failure, but it cannot be denied that bringing these countries together has sparked the first stages of progress and cooperation between Iran and the P5+1. The true success of the talks will become evident during the second round of discussions on 20th November; however, as Hibbs states, ‘we should all remember that we are currently in a place in negotiations with Tehran where we have never been before’.

troop withdrawal, the UK Government has committed to £178 million of annual funding until 2017, and Amnesty International is pressing for women’s rights to be prioritised, with the attainments already in place to be implemented and sustained. As Samira Hamidi explained, risk is the biggest challenge faced by Afghan women. The Taliban, unquestionably their biggest threat, comes in two forms; the obvious insurgents, and, the warlords holding seats in Parliament. Institutionally,

this makes the battle for women even more difficult. Yet they persist. Afghan women urgently want and need our support and protection. The support from activists in the UK encourages and shows them that they are not alone, while alarming the government to know that the world will not stop watching. What we can do is use our voices to amplify those of the growing number of incredibly brave Afghan women in such a crucial battle for their rights.

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It appears that in the final stages of the third day, France pulled back

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The fight for Afghan womens’ rights O Marral Shamshiri bathimpact Contributor n Wednesday 6th November, four delegates from the University of Bath Amnesty Society were invited to a reception in Speaker’s House, Westminster, celebrating the role of activism from the UK to Afghanistan, with particular emphasis on the need to protect and promote women’s rights. The University of Bath was one of four universities selected to attend this high profile event, which was hosted by the Speaker of the House of Commons, John Bercow, and attended by a number of MPs and ministers, women’s rights activists, the AIUK director, and acclaimed feminist Natasha Walter. Bercow himself, a former shadow Secretary of State for International Development, opened the reception with a welcoming speech praising the resolute work of Amnesty International, highlighting the importance of activism and human rights defenders, namely the courageous women in Afghanistan putting their lives at risk in the struggle to fight for their equality and rights. As Natasha Walter put it, ‘rights for women, they’re never given – they’re always fought for’. What followed was a number of inspiring speeches, a short film, and engagement with MPs regarding the priority for women’s rights in Afghanistan. Samira Hamidi, a human rights defender and advocacy director

at the Empowerment Centre for Women, Kabul, presented a particularly moving talk about women in Afghanistan. She accentuated the hardships faced by strong Afghan women activists, none of whom we ever hear about in the media which tends to focus on the victimised faces of vulnerable Afghan women. It was promising to hear about the Afghan women’s movement, and the congregation of women activists who persist in their battles much to the dismay and disapproval of their families. Women in Afghanistan may be inferior to their husbands, brothers, sons and male counterparts, limited from working and moving freely, and even jailed for running away from abusive husbands, but there have been substantive developments. Two and a half million girls are now in education, compared to five thousand in 2001. The women’s football team has played international tournaments, and the existence of the Elimination of Violence Against Women law alone is considered a great victory for Afghan women. Women today comprise almost 28 per cent of Afghanistan’s National Parliament, interestingly compared to the UK’s 22 percent. Put into perspective, the Parliament of Rwanda tops lists with 56 percent female representatives. Yes, we can question the plausibility of what these mean beyond numbers, but Afghan women really have built firm foundations in their

achievements. While such gains have been made, international forces plan to have completed the transition of security responsibilities to the Afghan National Security Forces by the end of 2014, and together with the presidential election, this will prove to be an unstable and tumultuous year. There are serious concerns that the hard-won achievements of women could be lost. Mechanisms are urgently required to ensure that women, women’s rights and its defenders are protected. Beyond

Pictured: The Bath Amnesty delegation who were invited to the Speaker’s House in London

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Activities

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SPOTLIGHT: BUGS lead the way

Coming up Bath Guides and Scouts get up to all sorts on their trips this fortnight

and a friendly, inclusive atmosphere. We are affiliated to SSAGO (Student Scout and Guide Organisation) and take part in their national events throughout the year. We have been lucky enough to win our

bid to hold a rally (massive camp) in February 2014 and are therefore busy planning this amazing event. There will be fundraising events coming up and we are looking for more people to get involved in staffing the rally; opportunities

BUGS

Hannah Hide bathimpact Contributor hen many people hear the word ‘Bugs’, they think of crawling insects or a horror scene from a film. However, with regard to the University of Bath, BUGS is the society for Guides and Scouts. As it is made up of some 36 members, Bath University Guides and Scouts is one of the smaller societies, but that does not prevent us from being able to think big! We have a packed programme each semester of activities from hikes to craft, camps to cooking, socials to adventure, and don’t forget the fires! Since September, we have taken part in two camps, in Bath, and in Bristol with other SSAGO groups for our respective Freshers. Unlike other societies, our meetings are not on one fixed day, however this semester’s weekly activities have included playing wide games in Combe Down, organising and running a hike for some local Scouts (with free chips available) as well as Pumpkin Carving for Halloween! As if that was not enough, we still have plenty of other activities planned before the Christmas vacation - all filled with laughter

Members of BUGS come in from the cold to enjoy a group meal

available include catering, first aid, transport and tour guides. However, you will have to be a member of BUGS to be able to take part in these activities! Our membership is open to all, whether they have been involved in Scouting and Guiding previously or they are completely new. As well as membership with our society, many of our members are volunteers in Scouting and Guiding Units across Bath. Students make such an impact with this that many units would not run if it was not for the support of the universities. Volunteering with Scouting and Guiding is a separate activity from joining our society, but we have all the contacts should you wish to get in touch with us! Being involved in Guiding, Scouting or BUGS can count towards both the Bath Award and the Duke of Edinburgh Award. There are also other awards which are available, such as Queen’s Guide or Scout which is open to all. Does this sound like something you would like to be a part of? It is never too late to join! Email us at su3bugs@bath.ac.uk for more information or buy membership on Bath Student-only £5, what a bargain!

PhotoSoc BodySoc get down at RHUL competition gether. Having spent so much time together in order to make for impressive dances, we have all become close friends and we now can’t wait to all compete as a team at Royal Holloway. The categories we will be entering are Jazz, Tap, Hip-Hop, Ballet and Contemporary, all in the Advanced level. We entered the competition last year and managed to win first place in both our Ballet and Tap categories. Although the standard is very high, this year we are confident thanks to the enthusiasm of our dancers and the new talent of our first years. We will also be performing our competition dances in our Christmas Show on the 10th of December. The profits from this show will be donated to ‘The Children’s Society’ so please come and show your support, not only for this wonderful charity but for the dances we are so proud of and wish to share with our university.

We recieved some amazing entries from Photosoc-ers for our first competition! The choice was hard, but of course we had to pick a winner, and we just loved this one by Nello Formisano, a second year PhD student in Electronic and Electrical Engineering. His photo, as well as being taken in Bath, made great use of the theme of ‘Reflections’, as it is taken upside down using the reflections of the Weir under Pulteney Bridge. Nello has been

Bath Amnesty are screening ‘Pussy Riot: A Punk Prayer’ which tells the story of how a group of feminist rockers protesting against Russia Location: 3E 2.4 Time: 18:15

Tuesday 19th November Sue Cox will be delivering a talk to Bath Atheist, Humanist and Secularist society on the subject of abuse by the Catholic clergy Location: 3E2.4 Time: 17:15

Friday 22nd November Black Tie event hosted to raise money for WFP operations in Syria Location: Claverton Rooms Time: 19:30

Saturday 23rd November

taking photos for a year now and borrowed his first camera from Photosoc, which led to him buying his own Nikon D90. We are already looking forward to next week’s entries! The theme will be posted on the Photosoc Facebook page, so keep your eyes peeled for more photo opportunities. We will be announcing the next theme this week. Remember that there is a £5 Plug voucher at stake! Nello Formisano

On 30th November Bodysoc, the University’s dance society, will represent Bath at the Royal Holloway University Dance Competition, ‘Get Down at RHUL’. The competition is organised to raise money for ‘Danceaid’, a charity that dedicates its time to helping underprivileged children in developing countries and the UK. We will be setting off early from Bath and competing all day long, hoping to secure a trophy with the dances we have been working so hard on. Professional dancers judge the competition, and so we will be under pressure to really impress them and do well. Our dancers were required to audition and initially impress our student choreographers to become part of the competition squad and are now improving further through our regular rehearsals. The rehearsal process demands hard work both physically and mentally and, although we take them seriously, we always have a laugh to-

Monday 18th November

Student Media will be running a League of Legends tournament for teams from all over the South West. Spectators welcome Location: The Plug and the Tub Time: 10:00

Saturday 23rd November Chamber Choir Christmas Concert, £7.50 adult, £5 concessions, email M.H.Painting@bath.ac.uk Location: Church of Saint Philip and Saint James, Norton Saint Philip Time: 19:30

Saturday 30th November WelshSoc are running a trip to Cardiff to watch the Wales vs Australia game. Tickets £15 for members, £16 for non-members Location: Pick-up from campus Time: 12:00

Thursday 5-7th December

Emily Betham

In keeping with the festive season, BUST are putting on a performance of A Christmas Carol. Tickets £5 Location: University Hall Time: 18:15

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Monday 18th November 2013

Media

Media Social: The Usual Shit

Dear Mum,

I know you’ve recently sent me some money, but Media did a drinking last Tuesday and, well, I spent all my moneys. Sorry. Dad has been calling me, pretty much non-stop. He texted me a couple of times asking how I’d done on my last piece of coursework; why does he have to monitor every single submission and never ask how I am? Well Mum and Dad if you must know... I haven’t really been to any of my lectures, I haven’t been able to keep up with deadlines. I can barely remember what I’m studying, because I have a newspaper to run, a radio station to keep on the air and many videos to be a making. Fuck you, Media.

There was once a time when Student Media at Bath wasn’t really a group at all, URB did a radio, CTV did things to look at and bathimpact did words, but didn’t really mix. This, however, is a thing of the past. Media at Bath is a family. Like that one in the Godfather, ‘cept we don’t put horses’ heads in people’s beds. We only ever use the penis. Every other week, we all dress like twats and head into town because we’re thirsty. We are generally thirsty. See the guy in the background below, the tall one... he’s a really nice guy. Victims were apparently eaten.

You may think Student Media is something of a geeky society; well you’re wrong. The man pictured above is Saffron Jacksonville Mcgreggor, he does barely anything for Media; he turns up, tells us random things about the history of Bath such as: “17 Royal Crescent was once hit by an incendiary in 1942 and not rebuilt until the 1950s”. Though he does sometimes help with spell checking and then drinks himself to death. We in no way endorse heavy drinking; medium to light is ok. So we implore you all to join us, we love you. 1love.

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Sport

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Is staggering change a bad idea ?

Tony McIntyre

Peter Nagle impactsport Contributor

The current format of the Heineken cup has been running for a long time with no hitches, so why is there need for a change now? in the league. They are also ir- spot. Also, the winner of the Am- ternational match clashes with a of which is just short of internaritated by the way the revenue is lin Challenge Cup won’t gain au- club game, the club will have the tional test matches, the strength distributed between the leagues. tomatic entry, which again will power to keep their players at the and depth of these countries will With the £44m generated from undermine the value of the second club or request that the top play- be severely hindered. Is it right the 2012-2013 Heineken Cup, competition. In addition, it has ers will be on the bench for their to have a European Competition England and France each got 24 been agreed that the revenue will national team. where only two unions will have per cent of the funds while the be split evenly among the English With the autumn internation- one team yet England and France Pro12 league received 52 per cent. Premiership, France’s Top 14 and als we could see nations fielding will make up 65% of the competiThe uncertainty of the future of the Pro12. second string teams. This is the tion? the tournament has been a major While these changes are what case in football friendlies, which Also, the Pro12 league system talking point but in late October, the French and English requested, are often viewed as meaningless. will be very complex because if the English, French, Irish, Welsh, their clubs still want the competiA second problem with the pro- you have a situation where say the Scottish and Italian unions have tion to be run by the clubs rather posals is that the redistribution two Italian teams finish 11th and all agreed structural changes for than the unions. of revenue will be split equally 12th respectively, how can it be the future of European club rugby. With the proposed agreements among the 3 leagues. The Rabo- fair that say the Newport Gwent The Heineken Cup will consist of in mind there is a strong case that Direct Pro12 consists of regions Dragons who finished higher in 20 teams rather than the current this could forecast a downward from 4 countries meaning Ireland, 10th won’t be entitled to Heineken 24 team structure and the Amlin spiral effect on rugby not only in Wales, Scotland and Italy will be Cup Rugby? Challenge Cup will continue to Europe, but also globally. Why? getting less money than they have With regard to the automatic have a quota of 20 teams in the If the Rugby Champions Cup is to in the past, a 37% reduction on qualification issue, the English competition. get approval, a premier competi- average per country once the new and French counterparts argue The RaboDirect Pro12 will have tion being run by clubs is likely proposals have been instigated. that the Celtic Nations can rest 7 entries where both England and to demean international rugby. This is a major problem consid- key players in league matches France will have 6 each. There will This is because the clubs will have ering the clubs are regions rather whereas in England, the fight to also be a play-off between the 7th more power and with more power, than privately owned indicating avoid relegation means that their placed English and French teams they will be able to control their that they will have less income best players are always tried and in order to obtain that final 20th top players meaning that if an in- to pour into their grassroots pro- tested. The fact is that this is a grammes; namely through clubs flawed argument because fielding and schools. a team week in week out in high The English and French clubs intense matches demonstrates will get richer whereas the Celtic that a team can improve its overregions will be starved of funds. all team chemistry. In the Pro12, This is guaranteed considering players are constantly rotated dePremiership Rugby have signed pending on the opposition meana new lucrative deal with BT over ing that combinations and experibroadcasting rights in the region mentation takes place making it of £152 million. harder for the team to get settled. Another issue is that of the One final issue which may qualification of the Pro 12 coun- emerge overtime is that the smalltries. Reducing the amount of er countries may see a player entrants of the Pro12 teams will drain. This has been a struggle seriously damage the game in Eu- for Wales of late with the likes of rope in the long term. In the cur- James Hook and Lee Byrne havrent format, Wales and Ireland ing signed contracts at French are guaranteed 3 places, while giants USA Perpignan and ASM Scotland and Italy have 2 spots Clermont Auvergne respectively. each. Reducing this number and If the money splashing Engrestructuring the meritocracy lish and French clubs offer higher means that each country will be wages with a greater chance of entitled to have one entrant where qualification to the Heineken Cup the remaining three places will be (6 spots guaranteed) compared to of the best finishers. Scotland’s one spot, the greater In the short-term it is likely players from both Hemispheres that Italy and Scotland will have will be attracted to the Top 14 or one team in the Heineken Cup Aviva Premiership. while their last placed clubs will be There is no doubt that there competing in the Amlin Challenge are more twists and turns to come Cup. Given that they had two fully as this remains a classic continue professional teams competing in the development of rugby pitted the Heineken Cup to experience against the money and power of the high standard, the standard professionalism dilemma. Fearless Fred

he Heineken Cup, Europe’s premier rugby club competition, has represented the sport’s domestic pinnacle in this Hemisphere since the turn of the 21st century. With clubs present from each of the 6 Nations in the shape of England, France, Ireland, Italy, Scotland and Wales, the tournament has ignited regional rivalries in this cross-border format and has played home to some of the most entertaining games in living memory. More importantly, it has spearheaded the development of rugby in countries such as Italy. For years Italy were (are still to some extent) the whipping boys of Europe but their presence in European Club rugby has greatly benefited their national team. All nations who are represented have benefited, and you can see how it has followed through to the international scene, as beating southern hemisphere opposition in the autumn months have become an expectation rather than an exception. Despite the praise and works of wonder the ERC (European Rugby Cup- the company who run these European tournaments) have done, the English and French clubs have proposed a rival tournament known as the Rugby Champions Cup which will be run by the clubs rather than the unions. The English party known as Premiership Rugby and the French party (Ligue Nationale de Rugby) have founded this alternative based on the fact that the teams compromised of the RaboDirect Pro 12 league gain automatic qualification year on year regardless of where a club finishes

Monday 18th November 2013

Sport

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A question of drugs in sport

Mel B.

Ben Cochrane impactsport Contributor

had a very hard choice to make: I write this article normally, or I write it when I’m high. Ponies are lovely. Now this may sound ridiculous, my little penguins, but this is a choice that most professional sports people have to make, along with cakes, I like cakes. Should they take drugs and be better, or stick with what they have and work hard to achieve the same level of success with a capital P? Taking drugs to enhance your performance is an attractive prospect, just like Jessica Alba. While others slave away for hours through blood, sweat, tears and semen, all you do is pop a couple of pills into your mouth or jab a needle in your eyeball or ingest some blood (or, in my case, smoke a fat one), and you can achieve greatness, perhaps even surpassing those who had to work for it. Have you ever wondered what the bit below your nose is called? It’s called a philtrum. So should this be allowed? Should people be allowed to stick two fingers and possibly a nose up to fair play and sportsmanship and indulge in glory and copious amounts of sex with soft porn stars? Mmm, soft. Lance Armstrong, apart from being devilishly good looking, is possibly the most famous cyclist, neigh (I’m a horse now), nay, sportsperson who has ever walked on the face of the earth, if it even has a face. I don’t trust it. He won seven Tours De France and, in amongst it all, battled with and kicked the arse of testicular, brain and lung cancer

Drugs in sport are becoming a large problem, with even great athletes getting caught using them all at the same time. What a man. would all just go away, much like Even though he did all that, porWell, actually, no, well, yes, kind of, this old man I met in Greece, but ridge, he is now one of the most no, oh look, Squirrel. It turns out alas it did not and eventually came hated people on the planet. Why? that, after categorically denying it out to himself and famous person Because he lied, that’s why. And for years, he had been a party, with Oprah Winfrey. He was stripped because he cheated, that too. And hats and balloons, to the most com- of his dignity, a nice Ted Baker suit sport has no place for cheaters. plex doping system in the history of and his dignity, sausage, as well as There are some people who think sport, which goes back precisely 24 his Tour De France titles, of which that maybe all athletes should be years. there were more than six and fewer on drugs, just to see how well they Even though he took 600 drugs than eight. This from a man who could actually do, how far humans tests and never tested positive for has raised hundreds of millions can be pushed, because we like anything except honesty and bald- of heartbeats and pounds for his pushing ourselves. I prefer pulling ness, he was accused by the USADA charity, Livestrong, and who has myself. Sponge. But that’s science, (the United States Anti-Doping inspired millions to battle against that’s purely for intrigue rather Agency) of using banned substanc- cancer and not to give up hope that than to win. Sport is about competes including the blood-booster EPO, one day your father might actually ing, and sex. For the competing to steroids and Fanta as well as having stop drinking and tell you he loves be valid then the playing field must had blood transfusions dating back you, because he knows you love him be level. That’s why Twerton Park to 1996. The accusations are based and you know that deep down he is shit for sports. Sport should be on blood samples from 2009 and loves you and will continue to sup- based on how hard you work, not 2010, and testimonies from wit- port you through university even if how much cock you suck or how nesses including former teammates you don’t want to be a mechanical much money you can afford to and a well informed and handsome engineer and hold out that one day spend on drugs. sports journalists from bathimpact. he will see the value and beauty of So I agree with people. Also beHe then didn’t deny it, hoping it interpretive dance. ing high really makes you hungry.

Thomas George Brady impactsport Contributor

t the Indian Grand Prix two races ago, precocious 26 year old German Sebastian Vettel coasted to yet another comfortable victory, and in doing so won his fourth consecutive World Driver’s Championship. He followed it up with a similarly dominant performance in Abu Dhabi a week later. From the midpoint of the 2013 season, Vettel has obliterated all competition, and the boos and jeers from the grandstands that increasingly accompany his seemingly permanent occupation of the top step of the podium attest to how tedious this has become. It may also have something to do with the beyond-irritating nature of his celebrations: awkwardly yelping on the team radio, and that strangely camp finger-wagging business. All that said, no one could deny he has thoroughly deserved this season’s title. So what of next season, then? Can he be stopped? The driver move that has undoubtedly attracted the most media attention is that of Kimi Raikkonen to Ferrari. The monosyllabic but often hilarious Finn joins Fernando Alonso at the Scuderia, in a switch

that has prompted speculation over the Spaniard’s capability to race in a team in which he is provided with high-level competition. After all, Raikkonen was the last Ferrari driver to win the World Championship, back in 2007. Team dynamics aside, this is probably the strongest driver pairing on the grid, and has the potential to deliver outstanding results. Whether it will, though, is another matter. Ferrari must build a car capable of winning races; for too long has Alonso outdriven his machinery. Mercedes have made solid progress this season, with Hamilton and Rosberg delivering eyecatching race wins. Their main problem has been getting the tyres to work effectively and for the same number of laps as the other frontrunners. With the rules regarding tyres changing for next season, there is no reason why we cannot consider Hamilton as a title contender. Outside of Red Bull, Ferrari and Mercedes, though, it is difficult to envisage a serious title challenge forthcoming. McLaren have struggled of late, with Jenson Button growing frustrated and disgruntled, and the

ph-stop

Is Vettel’s mettle too great?

Raikkonen seems to be the only threat to Vettel’s win machine promise Sergio Perez demonstrated with their bigger budgets to spend. in his Sauber days becoming ever Although unlikely to attract the atmore permeated by accidents and tention of the media, these contests errors. Lotus have been successful, carry huge importance, with signifiwith a well-balanced car that has cant financial incentives for teams consistently outperformed all but finishing higher up the standings. the Red Bull, but their well-docuVettel will deservedly go into the mented financial woes are in dan- new season as the strong favourger of jeopardising their chances ite. But, what fans want to see is for next year. the likes of Alonso, Hamilton and As always, the scrap for points Raikkonen competing with him on between the midfield teams is likely a level playing field in terms of the to be intense, with Force India, car. The result would likely be one Toro Rosso, and Sauber amongst of the most entertaining seasons others competing fiercely to break of the last decade. Whether we get the stranglehold of the bigger teams that or not remains to be seen.

Morton’s Mumbles & Moans Last Thursday, my phone broke and thus the instant access I’m used to having to useless information and Tetris, (My incredible high-score went down with the ship) was whisked away. So I found it pretty damn hard to keep up with the Football at the weekend, because I was far to wrecked to make it to a pub to watch it. Also when I was hanging around in bed watching whatever shit I was watching, I forgot to keep an eye on the scores online. So, within a fortnight of promising to my fine readers that I’d be vigilant and keep on top of the Football, I’d already dropped the ball. (See what I did there?) In fairness, I did listen to the Saints game last weekend, and I’m sure I didn’t drop the ball as badly as Boruc did there.(Yeah, I know things) Ok, I digress, but the point is, I was pretty thrilled when I did finally get around to reading the scores and saw Saints smashed Hull City. Third in the League baby, suck it everyone else, well except Arsenal and Liverpool. So, as it stands, I don’t have much else to say. I can’t, however, leave the space blank, though, so I’ll find something to ramble about. Well, I suppose I can tell about my tragic descent from sporting greatness in recent years. I overstate my talent, I was in fact pretty awful at sport, but when I did do play it, I was a triathlete. Now, my sporting ‘career’ took a bit of a nose-dive because of university festivities anyway, but I always thought it was just because of this fact that I was slowly becoming a lazy bastard. However, at the end of last year, I was diagnosed with some genetic condition known as Haemochromatosis, which basically means I have too much iron in my body, and movement in general knackers me out more quickly than normal people. It made me feel a lot better about myself, to be honest, to know that it was totally not my own fault I had become a slovenly mess. But, now I have to reside in the fact that I can write about sport instead of actually doing it. This is good enough for the time being; but I am looking forward to exploiting my body, when it finally decides to work again. I’m in treatment at the moment. This involves taking out a pint of my blood every week. My friend astutely pointed out that my ailment could in fact be healed in the middle ages, by leeches. Fuck. Well, until next time, people!

Monday 18th November 2013

bathimpact

Sport

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Michael Powell impactsport Contributor

veroyama

ootball, rugby, cricket, motor racing. These are just a small fraction of the list of the many sports in which female participation and coverage lags behind Men. There is one big exception to this rule, however, and that is Tennis. Men’s tennis is one of the most popular sports in the world, with the governing body, the ATP, helping to promote major tournaments and encourage participation at grass-roots level. Unusually for major sports, the women’s game is held in a similar standing, and for this the WTA must be given enormous credit. Women’s tennis gets an equal amount of coverage to the men’s throughout the world and in many tournaments, including the Grand Slams, players receive equal pay. In the UK, both men’s and women’s coverage are shown extensively on the BBC throughout

the Wimbledon fortnight. Meanwhile, throughout the rest of the year, ATP tour events are predominantly shown on Sky Sports, whilst WTA coverage belongs to Eurosport and the newly launched BT Sport. Why is it then, that with all this success, the women’s game still finds opportunities to selfdestruct? The Davis Cup; the only team competition in men’s tennis is a massive success. Certain weeks throughout the year are dedicated to the Davis Cup, with no ‘normal’ tournaments happening at the same time. Recent winners have been Serbia, Spain and the Czech Republic, largely due to the contributions of top-10 ranked players Novak Djokovic, Rafael Nadal, David Ferrer and Tomas Berdych. Andy Murray’s participation for GB has been limited, largely due to a poor relationship with the previous Davis Cup Captain John Lloyd and

y.caradec

Women’s tennis sets the standard

Sharapova was injured and couldn’t take place in the Fed cup, but probably wouldn’t’ve anyway little prospect of any other British player winning a match. However, when GB were given the chance to return to the World Group in the Autumn with a tricky tie away to Croatia, Murray opted to play, inspiring the team to victory and a place back amongst the elite. Injury permitting, he has also committed himself to playing in the first round of the World Group against the USA in San Diego at the start of next year. On the other hand, the Women’s equivalent, the Fed Cup is a complete shambles. The majority of top players opt not to play, feeling Fed Cup weeks are better spent recuperating from the punishing year schedule. A more fundamental issue though, is the choice in recent years to stage the WTA’s tournament of Champions event on the same week-end as the Fed-Cup final. Both the Davis Cup and Fed Cup are organised by the ITF, whereas the majority of tournaments throughout the season are regulated by the ATP and WTA respectively. Despite this, the ATP and ITP are able to create a schedule which suits both parties and helps the Davis Cup’s reputation continue to grow. The WTA appear unable to follow this lead though, with such the illogical timing of their Sofia event.

The tournament of champions is equivalent to the Europa League in football, which participants qualify through winning slightly lower events throughout the year. In most years, this illogical move may be seen as an inconvenience as opposed to a major problem. However, this conflict of interests was always on a collision course, and that collision came this year. When Italy and Russia qualified for the final, most anticipated a close encounter, fitting for the 50th anniversary of the Fed Cup. Unfortunately, things didn’t quite turn out like that. Whilst Italy named their strongest available team including world number 7, Sara Errani and number 12, Roberta Vinci, Russia’s top ranked player was world number 136 Alexandra Panova. Admittedly, there was some misfortune involved; Russia’s top two players Maria Sharapova and Ekatarina Makarova were both injured, although Sharapova’s participation would have been unlikely anyway. The major problem though, was that the heart of the Russian Fed Cup team, Maria Kirilenko, Elena Vesnina and Anastasia Pavlyuchenkova were all playing in Sofia. Some may argue that the three players should be honoured to have the opportunity in a major final for their country, but then

we’re getting dangerously close to a footballesque club vs country debate. And let’s be realistic, tennis is a career not a hobby for these players, and the chance to play in a tournament guaranteeing large sums of money is a hard prospect to turn down. The three players should never have been forced to make such a decision in the first place though, and the fact that these two events clash is due to selfishness and incompetence from the WTA. This inability to run its own sport properly is a major issue that needs to be addressed. So whilst we must be impressed by the successfulness of the women’s game, there are also serious questions which need to be asked, and also answers given to how the biggest women’s team event in sport was descended into a complete farce. To their credit, the ITF have moved the 2014 Fed Cup final back a week to avoid a similar outcome to this year. So let’s hope this is the beginning of an improved relationship between the WTA and the ITF, resulting in out enjoyment of the Fed Cup for another 50 years with more matches like Russia’s thrilling 3-2 semi-final win over Slovakia, not the one-sided 4-0 final we unfortunately witnessed.

Snowsports get chilly in Scotland Bath Snowsports trekked up to Edinburgh’s famous dry slope, Hillend, on Thursday evening for a weekend of dry slope domination. The boarders set off first on Friday morning in the individual GS (Giant Slalom) competition, with recent graduate Rob Wagner (now studying a masters at Brighton University) placed on top of the podium, with the Club’s Board Captain Jack Constable placing a 3rd after a valiant run. Then came the skiers turn to take on the challenge of the individual Slalom course, with Henry Carr and Mike Hutching placing

31st and 33rd respectively in the final that evening. Bath’s very own Jack Constable, Jon De Beaux. Dan Ivory, and Alex Kelly helped to entertain the crowd of over 2000 Snowsports enthusiasts in a spectacular Slope Style session. After celebrating the early success Bath was the first university to set camp back up for Saturday’s scheduled competition. The skiers took part in the individual GS competition, whilst on the other slope the Boards battled it out on the boarder cross course. Sonny Raymer-Fleming and Igor

Strata finished in the top 16 of the field of +60 riders. Our freestylers got back on the kicker to take part in the Big Air competition, whilst our Mixed Team Skiers battled through the rounds of the Team Slalom Duals. The Boarders dominated yet again in the Team Slalom Duals, beating Loughborough in the final to take victory like the true Lords of the West Country. The club is hoping to build on the success from the UK’s largest Snowsports event at the Western Kings round on Saturday the 16th November.

Bath Snowsports

Nicole Petit, on the competition at Edinburgh’s formidable ski slope

Edinburgh is a trek, but it’s a lot easier to get to than the Alps

impactsport Monday 18th November 2013

Snowsports hit the slopes, page 23

Bath Jiu Jitsu throw down Findlay Hannam, Jiu Jitsu chair on nationals weekend

Will Heineken Cup changes taint the sport? impactsport Contributor Peter Nagle talks about the plans to change the format of the Heinekin cup, and its consequences. Page 21 has the full story

You’d have to be a dope to like doping

Findlay Hannam

impactsport Contributor Ben Cochrane talks about his take on the Doping scandals that have rocked the world of sport recently. Turn to page 22 to read it all

The Jiu Jitsu nationals took place on the weekend of November 4th, and hundreds attended Overall it was a heavily enjoyonce that was over we all got to sit unavailable for comment). After the day was over Bath and watch the open tournament, able weekend, and we’re looking stood with their heads held high the biggest and baddest jitsuka forward to the next nationals in as we had a challenger in every in the country all competing for February! If you’d like to try out Jiu Jitsu final up to purple belt, giving us shiny trophies. After the awards ceremony we our training times are 8-10 on the potential for five medals. But more importantly, jitsu was done came out with a medal in three of Wednesdays and 6-8 on Fridays. for the day so it was time to get the nine categories, and won the Find us on bathstudent.com/ club shield, making Bath national sport/clubs/jiujitsu or email our drunk. chair on fh285@bath.ac.uk Tired and battered after the champions! day’s shenanigans,we pre-beveraged then headed to an Italian for the pre-social meal. The social theme was 80’s, so we’d exploited the ambiguity by dressing as video game plumbers from 1985, roman diplomats from 80AD and some charming baby boomers in their 80’s. Naturally the restaurateurs greeted us with funny looks, but jitsuka are far too badass to play by the rules. We then went to a bar, where our coach was pennied three times and a series of games ensued, conspiring to get us increasingly tipsy until we eventually trundled towards the night’s events, a night of dancing to music and listening to a DJ who loved the sound of his own voice. After our social secretary fell asleep on the toilet, we deemed it a necessary evil to go back to the hotel to prepare for the finals the next day. The next day started an hour later, which we were grateful for, because we were all hanging. It was another morning of training with more third dans, followed by a demonstration and then the FINALS!!!!!!!!! This was pretty intense, but The most epic co-operative facepalm that there has ever been Findlay Hannam

he Jiu Jitsu Nationals is an event in which jitsuka from all over the country gather together to train and compete in their respective grades, in the hope that their club will win the shield, and that they themselves will win a medal. It’s always an event to be eagerly anticipated, and this year’s was no exception. The plan was to leave on Friday night in three separate cars, to get to the hotel in Sheffield ready to rest up for the day ahead. However, once my gang of ragtag adventurers were in Birmingham we received a shocking phone call! A member of the third car group had managed to leave their kit on a bus. They’d then driven up to campus to try and wait for the bus to make a second loop, but after waiting for almost an hour they concluded that it had vanished into the Bermuda triangle that is Bath, and decided to drive to another club member’s house to borrow a gi. This backup plan, however, was dramatically foiled when the car ran out of battery. “Disaster!!” they cried, they cursed to the heavens, yet in their hour of need campus security was ready to lend a helping hand and a pair of jump cables to the dashing damsels in distress. Naturally as responsible committee members, our immediate reaction was to continue driving because we were about halfway there already, and laugh because it was quite funny. When the last car arrived late into the night, the rest of the jitsuka were sound asleep in their own hotel beds. The next day, an early alarm of 6:55 obliterated any peaceful dreams we were having. We got ready and stayed alert for one of the best days in the jitsuka’s calendar, we left without any car battery failures and everyone had their gi – after all, we are a club that learn as we go. We entered the giant dojo for a lovely 4 hour, 300-person session of jitsu getting taught by the almighty third dans, as wise as they are terrifying. But the main reason we were all there was of course, for the competitions. Places on the podium are scarce, so intensity increases and there is blood, sweat and tears as Bath fight for a place in the next day’s finals. One of our green belts even stuck his fingers in a girl’s eye to get rid of her. (His lawyer claims it was an accident. He is

Inside impactsport

The future of Formula one racing impactsport Contributor Thomas George Brady talks about Vettel’s recent domination, and runs through his possible threats. Turn to page 22 for more

Morton Mumbles and moans yet again impactsport Editor Connor McGregor Morton rambles on about sport related nonsense, once again. page 22 has the full column

Is Tennis the only sport that does women justice? impactsport Contributor Michael Powell on how women’s tennis is pretty progressive, but still has its faults. page 23 has the full story

Get involved

If you are interested in sport and want to contribute, then contact impactsport Editor Connor McGregor Morton (impactsport@bath.ac.uk) to find out more details about how you can get involved. We’re always looking for writers, photographers, people to take part, or just all round sports buffs to help out. So, if you have a story you want to share, don’t be afraid to get in touch!

Sam Short

bite Contents Music

p.4 Music Reviews p.5 The Guide

Culture

p.2 Editorial p.3 Lead article p.8 & 9 Fashion p.12 Food p.13 book review

News and social

p.7 Fancy dress & Computer game music themes p.11 Wedding theme no nos p.13 Facebookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s influence p.14 bNews

Fun fun fun

p.15 Sex and Horoscopes p.16 Puzzles

Nothing much...

Monday 18th November 2013

bite

Vinesterr

So first came the reformation of the Church. Which was probably for the best? Then Take That did a music. Now, Mcfly and Busted have had the Jeff Goldblum treatment what on earth is next? Jedlife Westwood? Eastwood? Norwood ...

That’s right, all the pretty ones have been carefully blocked out, because I’m jealous

EDITORIAL U2 had some good songs, just like Hitler was nice to some of his mates. But HE HAD TO BE STOPPED! Likewise, U2 are set to release yet another album, what is their problem? Haven’t they caused enough harm? Anyway. I’m sorry if you like U2. I’m really sorry. Like REALLY.

This weeks theme: well really, it’s ‘theme’ itself... This week bite tackles some issues relating to themes themselves, see editorial for why. This week in Bath Some rich git came to Bath and wandered around in a hat.

It’s not quite Christmas yet. All across the country councils are turning oﬀ street lights in suburbs, in Coventry recently the council has decided to have a go on main roads too. Why not? eh. In Bath we like to show them our wealth and just how we ﬂy by turning on the Christmas lights in February, or something. TEAM BATH!

impact-bite@bath.ac.uk

think it was her. Ultimately this was because I felt that themes actually regularly offered, aside from ease for new writers and structure for busy people, offered a new angle of creativity; for people to explore themes and ideas they may not perhaps usually. So what do ‘real’ magazines do, well, honestly, I don’t know. Do they follow trends and write about what’s that or set the trend after meetings of mass conspiring? Trending topics are always on our agenda, but we have an opt out, a way of rejecting mob mentality. If we see fit to review a gig from 1972, then that’s what we’ll do. So these themes are set by society or kings of cutting edge, ours, well, they’re just words that we hear people screaming in the smoking area outside Score on a Wednesday night. Damn. Often the decision of what the theme should be isn’t even a topic of discussion when seasonal and traditional events are in full swing. That’s certainly been true of bite for the past few years, there’s always a bonfire night/Halloweeny issue, a Christmassy one and probably something to do with Valentines/asphyxiated masturbation. This, just like writing about trends isn’t a bad thing, because ultimately it’s what people want to read about. I for one like nothing more than being in a Christmassy mood and all that comes with it. Trends and themes help us affirm our existence, give ourselves a sense of belonging and helps avoid relying on football chat. But just in case here’s a new one, forget ‘The problem with Arsenal is, they’re always trying to walk it in’ and go for: “Sheffield Wednesday’s problem is, WHAT THE FUCK IS SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY?!” So keeping up with pop culture is important, but so is offering an alternative to the norm. Recruiting Goths NOW! God they’re alternative, also girls with one other colour such as pink or blue in their hair. Man, wow, I mean… wow. With a loose theme, it means a middle ground can be established. Or so one would hope. Which brings us delightfully on to my next point. In bite, Writers with more crea_Max-B

U2 are WANK.

ou may or may not be a frequenter of our scriptures here at bite. In 2010 bite was created from a regular six-page entertainment section which had previously been oppressed, dwarfed by a news-heavy paper, the Ents section became bite, which became more of a culture mag than just entertainments, it continues to grow, to change with each new editor, with each new idea. With each cat picture. Safe to say I won’t bore you with the deets, or give you anything revolutionary. The most part of this change was that bite (bathimpact ‘lite’) was to be a pull out magazine, trying to remain as separate as can be; when fully attached to the main paper. We can’t aﬀord glossy paper. Then it was decided each issue would have a theme. This issue is taking a breaking from what’s been the norm for years and turning on itself for an introspective view of themes themselves. So there I guess that means there isn’t really a theme this week. Apart from, perhaps, themes themselves. Hence the picture of me kissing former SU President and most beautiful man in the world, on the cover. Obviously not all themes are good; equally they’re not all bad. The idea of a regular theme was a question of giving budding writers a weapon in their arsenal, not having written for a publication before is something that is quite daunting for many and we really do encourage people of all levels to write for us. I spoke to Rowan Emslie who came up with the idea and co-edited the section that year he said “it only had a theme because I decided it should. I went for themes as a good way to structure content and to make it easier for contributors to pitch articles. If you tell people to come up with ideas for articles you get less back if you don’t give any parameters”. The themes themselves end up being a loose framework for ideas most of the time rather than strict parameters, the question of whether or not I should remove the weekly theme is something I toyed with but ultimately realised I was being a cock. My mother once said “it ain’t broke, so don’t ﬁx it”, at least I

tivity are given the freedom needed to achieve what they wish with their pieces, this has always been the case and the biggest obstacle standing in the way has been a lack of either ‘creative students’ at our scientifically obtuse University. NOW, this lack of creativity isn’t as cut and dry as it may seem. Creativity isn’t just thinking of ideas, it’s not just writing or producing whatever you do within certain criteria, it’s more a question of self-belief, conception of time and relevance to ones ideals and goals. Academic and author Ken Robinson has written extensively on the subject and believes the flaw lies within the education systems in the ‘West’, namely in the UK concentrating on bolstering scientific studies at the expense of the arts. Not trying to establish who might be good at what and just neglecting the alternative aptitudes of more ‘creative’ students. His theory basically argues that we’re being ‘educated out of our creativity’, that children are all fundamentally creative in some way and our belief system is structured around the validity of academia. So, students: You can all create. I’ve met so many people on recruitment drives for bathimpact who had never sought us out, despite really wanting a career in media, advertising and other related fields. The reasons they give are usually one or both of two: I don’t have time (as if that’s actually a thing) and I’m not good enough. The latter reinforces the former argument and of course those who have no self-belief seem to be more innovative SO. Have you been educated out of your creativity, is simply fulfilling challenges to get to the next stage of eventual meaninglessness really more important than creating? Do you really not have the time to explore your individuality? Or just get pissed with us lot? This isn’t a recruitment drive, but, you know, what is life if not participation in culture? If you’re constantly observing and liking people being involved in ‘culture’ and not getting involved yourself. Do you really exist? I encourage any and all to come and have a go. (So hard not to write ‘if you think you’re hard enough’) Email me.

Monday 18th November 2013

bite

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sludgeulper

Themes supercedence of character

Depicted above a Communist promotion of the working youth in Czechoslovakia. Below John discusses many ideas around themes, don’t listen to John, he’s a communist. Written by John Barlow Within, books, films and day to day life there are many themes that pop up, whether it be moral themes such as love, duty, honour, or more broad themes such as pirates, or vampires. The thing all these themes have in common is that they are historically accepted as something worth talking about. So, in the interest of human advancement I shall now try to convince you that themes should always be secondary to characters. In some long forgotten cave around 100,000 years ago, a primitive version of ourselves expelled wind from their lungs and assigned some sound to some object. At that time with the help of much angered pointing and gesturing, language was born - think average English tourist - it did the job but it wasn’t pretty. As a result of our new found skills, Urrghhhg could now tell Gesh to wash and clean and Gesh could tell Sally to watch it or he’d beat her up… in our present society we have moved on leaps and bound from there of course. Now Sally could tell Steve to wash and clean and Steve could recite the whole works of Shakespeare. It would be odd I agree but he could. Over subsequent generations, more idiotic and stupid things where filed in the “not to be repeated” cabinet along with some useful things like “don’t eat that” or “this how make pointy thing”, getting cabinets for themselves. Probably on a Tuesday, some clever person decided that if everyone stopped stealing from one another there would be a lot less fights and the group would be better off, of course no-one wants to stop stealing, stealing’s fun. So a story with some kind of god smote who some kid, whilst saying “don’t steal” was born. Eventually we ended up with a large variety of stories most of which contain a set structure and comprising of a few main themes and morals we

have found to be useful in controlling and progressing humanity to this point. Kurt Vonnegut gave a short lecture on the shape of stories to a university somewhere at some point. The university and date aren’t really important. What is important is that within the lecture he had a graph illustrating good and ill fortune on the y axis and time on the x axis. The majority of the stories we experience through our day to day lives, be it a story at the pub, a movie, or a book can be mapped on to a few simple shapes. One most frequently occurring graph shapes is Boy meets girl, just off the top of your head you can probably think of Twenty or so Rom Coms with the exact shape depicted on the graphs right there ---> If we go back to our happy cavemen, they first created language to learn and exploit the world. It makes perfect sense that a story should include both the drop and the return to glory; it is the best way to deliver a moral message. A personal fault caused a problem; you suffer, make the right choice as per society, and then receive a big reward. Life inherently isn’t like these story’s, I for one have never seen a story in which a banker spent ten years of his life getting richer and richer, then getting a massive payoff in a financial crash and dying a happy man. These types of stories can exist, but it takes a different kind of story teller to keep interest throughout the pages, the kind of storyteller who doesn’t require a theme, one that can tell a story though characters that seem to live and feel behind the pages. Both kind of story has its place, as I am getting older however I find myself migrating away from the theme focused stories. It may be because I am slowing becoming pretentious and upper middle class from my elongated stay in Bath, but I genu-

inely feel that character driven stories are more truthful and thus more illuminating. I am not talking about truth in the sense that all nonfiction is truth and all fiction is lies, but in the sense that - could this have happened as told, can I relate to the characters personally, and afterwards do I feel have gained an insight into myself. To expand my point slightly, if you asked me now what matters to me I wouldn’t tell you about the conflict in the middle east, I wouldn’t even tell you about the current government and how it is affecting my quality of life. I would tell you about things personal to me; the interactions I have between friends, what I aim to do later in life. This is the same for all people, the things we will associate as large important times in history which will form the bases of future themes are nothing more than an amalgamation of our personal hopes and fears most of which are completely ambivalent to the issues which will inevitably define us. It is very difficult for a theme driven story to accomplish any of the above. Themes are too bulky

the very qualities that make them instantly recognisable as a theme, stop them from becoming truly great. There is too much pressure to either be with or against the grain… you will find few neutral war films. The written word has the most advocators of this humanist character driven story; in today’s literary landscape there are few stories that have a clear theme outside of expounding the human condition. Milan Kundera a 20th century author sets most of his work in or around Prague during the Communist Occupation / Revolution. His characters exist alongside such a monumental time in human history, yet Kundera takes great care not to make them heroes or victims. Communism is not a theme in his books but inevitability, the power of his works comes from the interaction between his characters amidst the forced ugliness of an oppressive regime, not portraying beauty but humanity. What I’m trying to say – from all of the above – is that language, or should I say stories are the most important thing to humanity. How we relate to the spoken or written word has directly influenced who we are today as a race, and as individuals. As we are steadily becoming more literate it is important for us to find new motivation to do good, outside of childish themes that promise fame, happiness and everlasting glory. It is odd to think that even now the majority of the western world’s moral code is dictated to us by a book written about 1600 -2000 years ago and the theme of the book is still “watch it!, we got dragons ;) ”. God is dead, humanity now only believes in itself and its own power. A story that does not capture your belief commands no power over your future life, and so themes are worthless. Definite proof there.

Monday 18th November 2013

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Luke L. Peel

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Alexander Ilija Coles

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Mike Coop

Live Review: Frightened Rabbit written by Alexander Ilija Coles

Live Review: Savages written by Luke L. Peel

ehnny Beth would have the voice to power a generation, if it wasn’t for the wall of white middle-aged men reminiscing about the Manchester post-punk scene of the early 80s. The Red Stripe skin head brothers beside me were clearly encapsulated by her masculine rhetoric. They proceeded to stumble over each other until one was hunched on two broad shoulders. The waves had broken inside their skulls and they swayed off balanced as Jehnny screamed, “Hit me!”. Much to my surprise security told the man to get the fuck down. This was of course after four or five of us had crowd surfed. Jehnny was impressed, spurring us on, “I probably shouldn’t say this but you are better than London”. This, coming from a band based in London, who in this past year has gained considerable hype surrounding their debut album ‘Silence Yourself’, was quite a compliment. Over the droning, pulsing rhythm of a subtle bass line she told a story of her dear friend. “She left a note on the fridge saying: Don’t let the fuckers get you down.” Retreating back into the shadows and the now overwhelming waves of grunge to reconcile her thoughts for a split second; you could see her face shrink and lift again like a fanatic’s idea of a botox. She continued. “If I ever reach a point where I ask myself whether there is something wrong with me, should I change? I have to look around to see if I am sur-

rounded by cunts. Don’t let the fuckers get YOU DOWN.” Filled with anger, their set and album is a landmark in the post-punk revival. They have a vibe that seems to bring your emotions back down to an earthly, raw and honest platform. A creative and melodic revamp that is so energetic that Big Jeff, the Bristol gig-going legend has never felt so alive. He is a man of miracles, never ceasing to appear at every gig and getting a shout out from the band, just a casual “Hey, Jeff” as they strolled on stage, as if they were ex band members. Although Jehnny engulfed centre stage, the rest of the band is truly superb, Gemma Thompson on guitar, Ayse Hassan on bass and perhaps the most impressive Fay Milton on drums. She could sure as hell beat in a drum kit with discipline, the core to their sound and by god she played. Put together, these four have got an attitude to make Patti Smith double take. Wake up, post-punk never died. For a taster, check out; ‘Marshal Dear’, ‘Shut Up’ and ‘She Will’. But bear in mind ‘This album is to be played out loud and in the foreground’ (a note from their LP cover, just to make sure). And, for those who have not been to a gig at the Trinity Centre. I encourage you to go and feel the walls tremble. It is a personal place, a perfect size for the presence of musical genius to hit you in the face and bowl you over.

hey say that when Scott Hutchinson was growing up he spent much of his youth looking scared and afraid. He was the physical manifestation of the old expression ‘like a rabbit in the headlights’. So when he came up with the bright idea to form a band with himself at the helm, as lead vocalist and guitarist, it seemed only appropriate that he would christen them ‘Frightened Rabbit’. From these shy beginnings these lovable indie-rockers have truly blossomed and alongside contemporaries such as ‘Admiral Fallow’, ‘The Twilight Sad’ and all the artists who come under the banner of the ‘Fence Collective’, they are right now at the very forefront of breathing new life into Scotland’s music scene. Also with their most recent album ‘Pedestrian Verse’ giving the band their first UK Top Ten, this is a band firmly at the peak of their career, thus far. As a result I thought now would be the perfect time to catch them so off I went to the University of Bristol’s Anson Rooms on Thursday 7th to witness the Frabbits in action. Coming on stage sporting some of the best beards I have ever seen they were here to justify the hype, and boy did they! It seems almost laughable that this was once a shy and introverted child, for Hutchinson had the crowd in his hands right from the get go with a couple of quick and confident remarks to bring belly laughs all round. But it was when they started playing that they really shone. They played with a display equal with passion and soul to any that I have seen from a band this year and

as a result the highlights came thick and fast. The jubilant sounds of ‘Old Old Fashioned’ got the crowd properly dancing and resulted in more twists, shakes and twirls than I have ever seen at a gig. It was joy unbounded. But, it didn’t stop there. ‘Acts of Man’ was quite frankly live music at its finest. Luring everyone in the crowd into a false sense of security with a completely stripped back version of it; they had everyone spellbound until in the second half of the song they suddenly changed direction to give one of the greatest sonic assaults I have ever heard or witnessed. I felt quite light-headed after it, which may have been due to the strobe lights but was probably due to just how much pure power they put into their performance. The contrast to the beginning of the song was spectacular and not since ‘The Pixies’ can I think of a band who’ve mastered the ‘quiet, loud, quiet’ technique quite so well. An excellent duet for ‘Fuck This Place’ with Hazel Wilde from the fabulous support act ‘Lanterns on the Lake’ left everyone smitten later on in the set and as they concluded with ‘The Loneliness and the Scream’ they surely left everyone in the crowd with a smile on their face. I danced, I sang, I laughed and I lived and I am sure that if you go see them too you will experience the same. It’s sadly rare that you get to see a band who clearly have so much love for what they do whilst simultaneously being at the peak of their career thus far so I really do recommend catching them while you can. Frightened Rabbit provide a gig to remember.

Monday 18th November 2013

THE GUIDE

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Bath Film Festival, 25th November – 8th December, Various Locations, Bath. This year’s programme seeks to extend the viewing experience beyond the familiar, the popular and the heavily promoted, by introducing different genres, different national styles and different ways of thinking about the world. Not to mention you can catch the IMDb New Filmmaker awards 2013 and check out the extensive list of showings on the website: http://bathfilmfestival.org.uk/ Woman in Black, Monday 2nd -7th December, Theatre Royal, Bath. Tickets from £17.50 Ladies, need an excuse to snuggle up to a man you fancy? Look no further than to the celebration of 25 years of The Woman in Black. The story of a solicitor being traumatised by death and secrets in a remote village has the core ingredients of a big creaky building, a vengeful ghost and a sceptical protagonist. Definitely a must-see. A Christmas Carol (BUST), Thursday 5th – Saturday 7th December £5. Bath (obviously) University Hall Ho, ho, ho, it’s a great BUST show – this wonderful cast will be performing this Christmas Classic to get you in the Christmassy mood. Scrooges need not apply. Note: those who do not attend are almost 100% likely to be haunted by the Ghosts of BUST’s past, present and future. Trust us, don’t risk it - It’s only a fiver!

ARTS

Stornoway, Saturday 23rd November at 02 Academy, Bristol. £15.40 Stornoway, are similar to a fuck load of bands that came about during the ‘folk revival’ which I think has finished now, we can all go back to John Martyn. This band, however, will stand the test of time. Their music is inspirational, euphoric and another ambiguous adjective of goodness. Seriously, check them out. The Correspondents, Friday 22nd November at Moles, Bath. Head up to the close confines that is Moles and bear witness to the multi-genre approach of jazz, electro, Hip Hop, Blues and Drum n Bass, all brought perfectly together with Mr Bruce’s perfect vocals ; depicting the trials and tribulations of love, lust and loss. A truly unique sound. The Naked & Famous, Friday 29th November, at O2 Academy, Bristol. Make sure you catch The Naked and Famous – this New Zealand band, often compared to MGMT, promise a fantastic night of ‘vast sonic horizons and throbbing electronics’, or to put it simply – a night of electro-indie-pop coolness. Let’s be honest anything that originates from where Lord of the Rings was filmed must be amazing.

Carl Donnelly: NowThat’sWhat ICarl DonnellyVolumeV, Friday 22nd November, 8pm, at RondoTheatre, Bath. £12 Seen on Mock theWeek and Russell Howard’sGood News and nominated for best comedy show in the 2013 Foster’s EdinburghComedyAwards.One can simply not miss Donnelly’s performance -With a talent for being able to draw out the humour, that others who simply recall incidents from their life so often don’t, his act ensures that your sides will be splitting from laughter. Sitcom trials, Friday 29th November at 8pm, at RingO’Bells, Bath. £4/£3 Do you want an excuse to openly judge other people’s performances?Or just feeling bitter and need a good pick-me-up? Head down to RingO’Bells and watch 5 new sitcoms battle it out and then choose the winner.The championing sitcom then take in the viewers’ suggestions for the ending and improvise it. Bear in mind- you could potentially be watching the next ‘Inbetweeners’/’Peep Show’/’Miranda’. Motorcity, Every Saturday night at Komedia Bath. It’s not comedy, but it’s at a comedy club.That’s good enough. Ever get fed up of the same old clubnights, can’t handle getting up in the week? Komedia offers the answer on Saturday nights

COMEDY

MUSIC

Monday 18th Movember 2013

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Fancy dress themes can fuck off tempt to woo a potential mate in Fuzzies. This now brings me on to my second argument, the cost of making outﬁts. Whilst it is possible to customise a t-shirt with the liberal use of some scissors and glitter, the fact inevitably remains that you’ve lost a tshirt. Which now needs replacing. This can get very expensive very quickly, particularly if you enjoy themes or are good friends with people who do. However, it doesn’t stop there, as people will go above and beyond to prove themselves in the theme stakes. People will spend quite frankly ridiculous sums of money on elaborate pre-made costumes that they will probably never use again or shoehorn it into other themes. Take one of my elaborate purchases - a unicorn onesie. I decided to purchase perhaps the most stereotypically gay item I could for what was a pyjama party. I have since, however, attempted to convince people that it is appropriate attire for a safari night because unicorns are a national animal of Scotland. They are. Google it. Notwithstanding, not many elaborate fancy dress costumes double up as comfortable lounge wear and if your housemates Wrathernaut

ver your time at University, some people will encourage you, perhaps even force you, to believe that themed nights are the best thing since sliced bread or perhaps even since the discovery of fire. However, they’re wrong on every level imaginable as many of the arguments that they use are weak and even highlight the points against them even more. Take, for instance, the idea that ridiculous themes bring people together because everyone is dressed ridiculously. It is with great sadness that I must inform you that you’re all still dressed in ridiculous costumes and no amount of smoke and lights can distract people from the fact. Even if you made it yourself with Sellotape and cereal boxes. A work of art it may be, however Sainsburys could probably do a better job for half the price in their Basics range and it won’t fall oﬀ you as you at-

Jenny Downing

Written by David Cameron

asked you to wear your Pac-Man costume when guests come round, you look crazy, not cute. This doesn’t even cover the fact that you may have spent more on dressing up than you did during the night itself. A depressing thought when you think what you could have done with the money otherwise. With all of the eﬀort that people put into costumes, we now come to the crux of the issue. On a night out, how much eﬀort do

you put in? Turn up without a costume and you look like the odd one out. Only to find that your friends may have decided to put in half the effort and you rock up with an elaborate costume. Out of place again. You can’t win and on themed nights (I’m looking at you Fuzzies) everyone sits on the extremes, never in the middle. You’re destined to look out of place so with all of the time, effort and money you’ll spend, why bother?

It’s not just thumbtertainment Written by Anthony Masters

he use of themes and leitmotifs linked to characters or situations has defined computer game soundtracks. The nascent soundtracks were simple loops, severely limited by hardware. As aliens descended in Space Invaders, the four bass notes became more rapid. Pac-Man eats fruit and flees from ghosts, with Toshio Kai’s theme repeating. Home consoles usurped arcade machines, bringing great musical experience and creativity to game soundtracks. Today, powerful computers can play full orchestral scores written by leading composers. In the late 1980s, many musical masters began their trade. Nobuo Uematsu wrote the music for Final Fantasy, whilst Koji Kondo wrote the astounding themes for both Super Mario Brothers and The Legend of Zelda. Sequenced music allowed composers to create grand atmospheres. The ostentatious soundtrack for Ocarina of Time matched Link’s time-travelling quest, whereas David Wise’s ethereal Aquatic Ambience theme for Donkey Kong Country backs the superb underwater levels. Released in 1997, Uematsu’s Final Fantasy VII soundtrack still stands as one of the finest soundtracks ever composed. Aerith’s Theme is beautifully solemn;

the battle leitmotifs are highly memorable, and the JENOVA theme captures strange urgency. Anxious Heart, used to signify desperation, is actually a slowed, sombre version of Final Fantasy VII’s emphatic and euphoric main theme. The ﬁnal battle music – One-Winged Angel – replicated choirs singing Latin. Streamed audio allowed full vocal tracks and orchestration. Halo’s prelude, written by Martin O’Donnell and Michael Salvatori, features portentous Gregorian chants; and Norihiko Hibino’s rousing Snake Eater theme for Metal

Gear Solid 3 pays homage to James Bond ﬁlms. Yu Miyake’s fun and addictive theme for Japanese roll-em-up Katamari Damacy – a description I swear makes sense if you play the game – is brilliantly creative. Producers used to utilise on-site composers, but now increasingly draw composers from the world of cinema and classical music. Harry Gregson-Williams, who scored the Chronicles of Narnia ﬁlms amongst others, does most of the themes for the Metal Gear Solid games. Hans Zimmer, famous for The Dark Knight and Inception

soundtracks, scored the main themes for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 and Skylanders: Spyro’s Adventure. Orchestration has meant the music can match the cinematic feel of some games, such as Greg Edmondon’s soundtracks for the adventuring Uncharted series. This creative ﬂexibility is demonstrable in long-running series. Junichi Masuda’s music for the Pokémon series has certainly grown. Memorable tunes backed the original games in 1996, but Pokémon Black & White featured an electric orchestra for the multilayered Decisive Battle with N Theme, with duelling drums and demonic choirs for the Ghetsis Theme. Computer game soundtracks are ﬁnally receiving widespread acclaim. Classical FM’s Hall of Fame 2013 ranked Nobuo Uematsu’s Final Fantasy series and Jeremy Soule’s Skyrim score above that of Beethoven. It is now possible to see your favourite themes played live by full orchestras, with Video Games Live and Distant Worlds. Computer game soundtracks are able to convey deep and diverse emotions, from hopeless despair to triumphant victory, from mystery to revelation. These soundtracks are not merely secondary, or enjoyable, they are forms of art in themselves.

Monday 18th November 2013

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Fashion Bloodhound

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Written and photography by Natasha Thompson

On the 13th November the online designer resale site, Fashion Bloodhound, arrived to Bath with a ‘stylish bang’ to mark the launch of their Winter Showcase in The Francis Hotel. The event, which has been in every Bath fashionista’s diary, offered a great opportunity to browse through an incredible selection of pre-owned designer pieces whilst enjoying the elegance of the Francis Hotel.

Mulberry for £50, flowing champagne, scrumptious sweet treats and a glamorous make over – Yes please! Armed with my special VIP ticket and a purse full of cash I eagerly set upon my journey to the sale of season on the look out for my dream pair of over the knee boots.

Greeted at the door by delightful young man with a tray of champagne flutes, I ventured down the lavish staircase to set my sights on what I can only describe as a heavenly vision; Jimmy Choo, Chanel, Isabel Marant, Burberry and Prada, to name a few, every girl’s dream wardrobe in one room. My inner magpie instantly beckoned me toward the jewellery table, but no, I was being good and resisted temptation, sticking to the quest in hand.

I made my way over to the shoe room, and there they were, a spectacular pair of over the knee Stuart Weitzman boots gleaming and screaming “BUY ME!”. Clasping the boots in one hand, heart racing, I tentatively turned them over to reveal “size 39, £100”. Could this be true? Had I finally found the perfect boots? Scuffling towards the chair, whilst ripping out the stuffing, I pulled on the first boot like Cinderella trying on her slipper. Stuart Weitzman, you angel sent from heaven, how have we not met before? After one cupcake too many and a considerably lighter purse I floated home in euphoric spirits, perfect over the knee boots in hand. Ok, so I didn’t find my prince but who needs a prince when you can have shoes?

Monday 18th November 2013

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Trainer you to be fashionble facebook.com/bathimpact

Written by Abi Glencross

Back in the day my trainers used to gather would have to be artfully tucked away, ladies den realisation that if they are ‘in’ we don’t dust in the corner of my cupboard, only ap- don’t need socks! pearing for the morning...weekly…monthly

actually have to take them off after the gym.

But, times have changed, and sneakers are However, sportswear has made a comeback,

run, or when my mum felt she would indulge now seen as a popular fashion accessory. I’m we are donning our kicks and our socks are in a splash of step aerobics. I wouldn’t be seen not sure if it’s the popularity of the Olympics, proudly pulled up. DEAD out in them, and if I had to, my socks we are revisiting the 90s or have had the sud-

So what do your foot gloves say about you?

The ‘never wear a pair’

The fashion fraud Identity: Following the trends these chaps will know ‘sport chic’ is in. However, the thought of actually running in their sneakers is horrifying, what if I get them dirty? Trotter covers: Trainers that would do as much good running as tying carrier bags to your feet. Purely ascetic. Brand me: Nike/Adidas high tops, anything from Urban Outfitters.

Identity: “Ummm what’s sport?”. Don’t know where the STV is, how to hold a tennis racquet and would cry if the bus is cancelled up to Uni.

The ‘stuck in the 90s’ Identity: Probably owned a skateboard at one point in the late 90s, stood on it and fell off into cluster of stinging nettles and never tried again. The skateboard left however the shoes remained, and buying new ones means shopping. Blergh.

Trotter coat: Trainers? Don’t own, don’t care.

Trotter coat: Old school skater shoe popular in the 90s and modelled by Tony Hawk. Battered, bruised but “they don’t make ‘em like they used to”.

Brands: Havana flip flops, Jimmy Choo heels, ’practical shoes’ or bare foot.

Brand me: Vans, Etnies

Trotter coat: Super old, with ‘go faster’ speed holes and engrained in mud. Used for any activity involving movement. Yup these trainers weren’t originally sling backs… Brand me: Asics, Nike, Adidas. Like the dedicated sportsperson, but older.

Identity: Super fit, super lean and super supported, both by their shoe and their sponsor. These folks are top of their game and have the best of the best sports gear, covered by their sports scholarship. The chaps you see living in the STV or sleeping in afternoon lectures, training starts at 6am! Trotter coat: The more vibrant the better, but proper useful. They want to float on air rather than pound the pavements, otherwise knee replacements all round at 30! Brand me: Asics Gel Kayano, Upper Armour, Nike. Anything harbouring the latest tech and roomy enough to house custom made insoles.

The couch potato

Identity: These guys are old hands at their sport, and wear their kicks till death do them part. They’re always off on a Wednesday afternoon to go kick a rival university’s butt, or heading off at the weekend to some insane outdoor assault course. Failing that, they are sat watching ‘A Question of Sport’ wearing their kicks.

The Sportsperson

The bear Grylls Identity: Guys that go to the gym, walk on the treadmill, chat, slurp some water from their designer sports bottle then go and use the sauna. This exercise then gives them a legitimate reason to go eat three 50p paper chocolate bars. Trotter coat: Really expensive, always clean. Never need replacing. Brand me: Nike. It’s the tick that does it.

Monday 18th November 2013

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5 wedding themes not to pick Written by Nick West

1 Stamps of the Early 19th Century I don’t think I even need to explain this one - it’s so obvious you’ll be kicking yourself for not thinking of it sooner. Basically, everyone comes dressed as or wearing a costume inspired by their favourite early 19th century stamp. You could be a Norwegian Penny Black or the rarest of rare, the Red Shilling with misprinted queen with three eyes. I KNOW, RIGHT? Pros: Everything. I mean, come on! You’re dressed as the mother of excitement, the little sticky bit of paper that makes sure your letters get delivered. I don’t know why you’re not more excited than you are. Cons: The main risk, but this goes hand in hand with stamp collecting, is that you might die of too much excitement (symptoms match those of losing the will to live) Verdict: If you think everyone can handle THE FUN then go for it. You’ll be the talk of the town and everyone’s going to come to you for their wedding. Life can only go up from here.

Game of Thrones

Just how much incest and murder can you get in one wedding? That’s what we’re here to ﬁnd out in this Game of Thrones themed wedding. The music and the death count’s rising and everyone’s avoiding the creepy uncle who keeps making eyes at little Timmy. The ambience can best be described as Anglican Church fetish orgy, but you got some really unique wedding gifts. Pros: We all know you’ve always wanted an excuse to buy a proper sword and, if you’re lucky, you might ‘trip’ near your new mother-in-law Cons: Yeah, I’m going to hope that the cons are obvious, you perverted serial murderer. Verdict: If you can ﬁnd the perfect church, then it may be worth a shot. But chances are your local anglican priest might put his foot down.

3 Schnitzel and Fritzl

Picture this, the walls are draped with traditional Austrian memorabilia, the beer ﬂows in steins and a lovely polka is playing on an accordion. Everyone’s in lederhosen, there’s a family of women locked up in the corner, and it’s the happiest day of the bride’s life. Pros: Easy to cater, simple dresscode for guests Cons: Massive human rights abuses, worldwide condemnation, the whole ‘German’ thing’s a little bit tacky. Verdict: Not the worst idea, but schnitzel is really an acquired taste for some people, it’ll be a catering nightmare. So only do it if you are prepared to cook and eat the fussy people.

4 Sexpression

No, that’s not the portmanteau of ‘sex’ and ‘expression’ - sexy oppression is the theme here with another costume based theme. Imagine walking down the aisle dressed as a Hitler in lingerie, your toothbrush tache trembling in terrific trepidation. I naughty Idi Armin here, Kim Jong Il - just ungh. Pros: You finally get an excuse to wear that sexy SS uniform you got as a blue present in your teens Cons: Everyone’s gonna want to come as Hitler. Verdict: Barbara’s definitely gonna accuse you of copying her daughters Sexy Stalin Sweet Sixteen and you know what that uppity, trout-faced biddy is like.

5 Gay

These are all the rage at the moment, so why not go out and marry a man (or a woman if you are likewise vaginally endowed)? The colour co-ordination will be second to none, the catering will be to die for and you’ll be cocking a snook at the Tories - what could be better. Pros: You get to marry a sexy, sexy man. (Or a woman if you decide to go lesbotic) Cons: None. Absolutely none. Apart from the possible destruction of human society, but YOLO. Verdict: Just do it.

Monday 18th November 2013

Bath’s alternative to greasy spoons

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Just off the upper high street, this venue has been chosen as the Best Indian Restaurant in the South West by The Asian Curry Awards in 2011. Upon entry the grand interior and extravagant décor provide an initial wow-factor. The brand new exclusive special offers make this restaurant an excellent place for you students not wanting to splash out the cash. The lunchtime deal consists of a three course meal at only £8.50, and an evening two course a la carte meal offer at £12.95 There is a wide selection of dishes from mild to spicy to ‘Holy crap, get me a glass of milk’! The food is excellent, exactly what you would expect from a great Indian restaurant. The giant size of the interior means it is great for a large group of people meeting for a birthday get together or a social.

When planning to eat out, going for Nepalese food doesn’t exactly come to the forefront of your mind, which is what makes Yak Yeti Yak so unique. The Sunday Times has placed it in the top 130 restaurants in the UK in 2012 and it has gained growing recognition since opening in 2004. The friendly and relaxed atmosphere is incredibly welcoming, making this a great place to dine with friends and family. The food is very authentic, varying from family favourites in Nepal to classic dishes. Price wise it is very reasonable and ideal for students planning on dining on a budget. The lunch menu includes a three-course deal of only £10.50, which despite having a small selection is tasty and very good value for money. The main menu has a much larger selection and includes a good choice of vegetarian options, which is excellent for those picky vegetarians out there. Moving onto desserts, the favourite is the carrot tart, which is unusual and an excellent palette cleanser. Yak Yeti Yak is a must visit while you’re in Bath, at the very least to taste a slice of Nepal.

Christopher Jones

Hidden behind Waterstones on John Street, this little venue has been voted by Channel 4 as one of the top five American restaurants in the UK. The ambience is very relaxed and cosy, making it ideal for a small group of friends or a dinner with the parents. It’s also an excellent place to go for a little dinner date, so it covers all of the bases. Regarding the food, the menu mainly consists of small pizzas and half grilled chicken with different spices, which are much more extravagant than Nando’s signature dish. The menu itself changes three or four times a year, to adjust with season, making each visit fresh and new. Their most popular dish at the moment is the Texas Spice rubbed chicken served with jalapeño coleslaw, which with a side order of spicy fries is perfectly filling. For those of you with a sweet tooth, their decadent chocolate brownie is jazzed up with a considerate scoop of coconut ice cream which cleanses the palette with a cooling aftertaste. Combined with their daily special deals on certain items on the menu you can definitely eat here on a budget. Definitely worth a visit during your time in Bath.

bathrestaurants.co.uk

The Eastern Eye Indian Salathai Thai Yak Yeti Yak Nepalese

Grace Olivia

Awarded ‘Best Italian Restaurant in Bath’ by the Bath Good Food Awards 2012 and public number one on tripadvisor, Sotto Sotto definitely lives up to its expectations. The attentive service adds to the already warm atmosphere, making the entire experience easy-going and non-stressful. The food is even better. As well as the pasta and pizza you’d expect from an Italian, they have great speciality dishes. One of the most popular of these is the veal shank accompanied by a bed of saffron risotto. The desserts, however, continue to impress. Making a decision from the dessert menu is much too difficult. Notably, the Limoncello profiteroles or the Disaronno and dark chocolate mousse which is idyllic for those chocoholics of you out there. The portion sizes and prices are very reasonable, especially considering how superb the food is. This place is perfect for treating that lucky girl, or if you want to feel like a princess you should demand that your man should spoil you.

Firehouse Rotisserie USA

Sotto Sotto Italian

Written by Antony Nearchou

This charming little venue is located on Manvers Street, at the opposite end to the train station. The authentic feel of this restaurant gives you a genuine taste for Thai cuisine. The Thai Massaman, coconut milk curry with cashew nuts and potato, is a particular favourite of customers. The main courses can accompanied with a choice of meat or fish, as well as having a vegetable and tofu option. Salathai is an excellent venue for vegetarians as each dish is available to them. In addition to having a flexible menu, there are great lunch and evening deals. If you fancy a lunchtime treat a main course alone is £5.95, both with a starter is only £8.95, both with jasmine tea or filter coffee included. The special early dinner, between 6pm and 7pm also comes with the complementary tea or coffee, and costs £10.95 for a starter and main course from a reasonable selection of dishes. All in all, if you’re looking for good quality food at great value for money, then Salathai is your destination.

Monday 18th November 2013

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Bit-my-arse-strips Written by Peter Nagle

he art of communication through the use of evolution. Memes have been extremely popular of positioning of the avatars will stay the same, you Facebook statuses has evolved into more late namely because they take images that carry can edit the text and change the facial expressions than just a simple update. It is not just about the same implications you are trying to portray to further personalise the cartoons. what is on your mind but rather how can you show but in an entirely different context. More recentLike it or not, this creative way of expression us what is on your mind? And it is the emergence ly, comic based cartoon versions of friends have has been rewarded in that renowned venture-capof new applications that are giving you this op- sprouted up all over Facebook. The app behind ital firm Horizon Ventures, which has recently intion. vested in the app, the total amount was A status, originally speaking, is simply undisclosed. As a result, the key quesan update of your feelings, interests or tion is that will companies start to use location. On Facebook, you can type as Bitstrips as a platform to market prodmuch as you want and update whenever ucts and brands through visual humour? you want. You can demonstrate and type It is exciting to recognise that there is any emotion ranging from sarcasm to anan increasing portfolio of apps out there ger or even excitement. to express yourself as well as multiple diDue to the advances made by web 2.0 mensional categories when writing a Faand smartphone integration, images and cebook status. If Bitstrips is the current videos by being ‘shared’ has for long betrend, one cannot help but ask what will come the norm of when you see a status. be next on the horizon? Will we see this Users like to post and share songs they continued portrayal of images expandlike, interesting and stimulating articles ing into a 3D format? Perhaps we will plus their performances on games: Farmget to the stage where we will be able ville most notably springs to mind! Feato design our own animations in order to tures such as Instagram transform your highlight our moods and activities simiphotos in order to make them more visular to that of a Sims scenario almost. Or ally appealing or like you’re from the past, maybe sounds will become more influor from a world where everything has a ential. yellow tinge. More recently, Vine has preSiri may become our spokesperson or ceded the static image format by enainstead, we may want to speak to the bling users to create looping videos as has world ourselves through voice recordSnapchat which allows people to capture A funny or an irritating form of expression, what will the future bring us ings. One potential motive to help us imimages/videos at their own use containing pact our statuses may be that of sound a short message for a set duration of time. this is Bitstrips. Although setup in 2012, its recent effects. For instance, if you say you are hungover Now Facebook lets you categorise what you are explosion in usage comes as a result of iPhone and will we then hear someone falling with pots and doing whether it be checking in to restaurants, Android updates released this September. This has pans smashing? If we post that we are engaged what you are eating or where you are travelling become an accepted way of expressing yourself will this be followed by church bells? If a sporting to, for all of which, images of the suggestions are online. Apart from being a free service, it seems to event is on, will we do a voice memo shouting out provided, for example pizza slices or a football. It be popular among users since one can completely “Come on Bath!” is also armed with emoticons (smiley faces) to il- customise your appearance on Bitstrips. In addiUltimately, we are spoilt for choice, but with lustrate how you are feeling. tion, if your friends use Bitstrips you can add them technology these choices can only widen through Going back to the role of images in particular, into your own comic strip collections which con- the senses. In the future, the way in which you this seems to be the main trend in terms of status sist of pre-set scenarios. While the background of speak to the world will no doubt be different.

Kleenex at the ready Written by Alice Tawell and Lucy Wild

espite finding itself on the Teen Fiction shelves of your local book store, ‘The Fault In Our Stars’ was hugely anticipated by fans spanning all generations, largely thanks to John Green’s following from his incredibly successful YouTube channel, shared with brother Hank, The Vlogbrothers. TFIOS has been out since January 2012 and in this time has gathered a legion of loyal fans which is set only to grow as the book is now in the process of being transformed into a film. The story finds two teenagers, Hazel Grace and Augustus Waters, falling head over heels in love but with one quite literally life altering problem, they both suffer from cancer. You may be thinking this leads for a very obvious, clichéd plot line and, yes, at points it is rather predictable as to what’s about to happen, but we find it’s this simplicity that gives the book so much charm. Hazel and Gus are just two normal teenagers, there’s nothing pretentious about them or the way their story is told, and you’ll find yourself getting far too attached to these two protagonists. Hazel and Gus’ dry sense of humour about their situation gives the whole thing a sense of realness that these kinds of

book can sometimes lack. Their acceptance of their fate only makes the whole story even more heart wrenchingly beautiful. We find it refreshing to see a book about cancer patients that doesn’t over romanticise their illness. John Green holds the ability to take a simple romantic-comedy story line of boy-meets-girl, inject it with such a sensitive issue as cancer and yet still manage to make it so relatable. As Augustus says himself ‘You have a choice in this world, I believe, about how to tell sad stories, and we made the funny choice’. If you’re looking for an easy and heart warming read, or if you just want a good cry, this is definitely the book for you! We give this book a solid 4.5 out of 5. As it says in the book, ‘Sometimes, you read a book and it fills you with this weird evangelical zeal, and you become convinced that the shattered world will never be put back together unless and until all living humans read the book’. It would be extreme to say that the world would end if you weren’t to read this book, but we strongly recommend that you do. Or failing that, just go and watch the film next June.

Monday 18th November 2013

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bite news

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Things which may have, but at the same time definitely did not, happen.

Thomas Gane Former bite Editor

he Earth faces imminent destruction at the hands of Queens Park Rangers footballer Joey Barton, 31, after a mishap involving a promotional campaign for the Xbox One led to a virtual version of Barton escaping from the confines of Cyber Space to wage war on humanity. In response to a plot that many experts have described as “startlingly similar to that thing they did on South Park onetime”, an emergency meeting of The UN Security Council has been called in the hope that something can be done to bring the rampage to an end. The crisis began when Microsoft held a conference to show the immersive qualities and Virtual Reality potential of the Xbox One with a prototype version of the much loved ‘Football Manager’ series. However, this would simply prove to be the latest in a string of high profile errors in the run up to the release of the new console. When players learned that they could go into the game and give real team talks, a staggering 90% chose to manage QPR, play Joey Barton out of position and then berate for him for upwards of three hours during the

team talk. In fact, out of the 50 people chosen to demo the new game only 5 people managed to make it into the second half of their first match, and three of those only stopped the team talk to play Barton in goal and catch their breath so as to berate him further at full time. When Jim Morris, 23, from Fulham called Barton “a cum guzzling arse pirate” and “a dirty dumpster slut”, however, the player snapped and murdered Mr Morris with a Gatorade bottle and the shoelaces from his right boot. Upon doing this, Barton assumed the role of God in the virtual world and escaped from the confines of Football Manager with Luis Suarez and recruited Team Rocket, Kirby and ‘Blinky’ The Red Ghost from Pac Man to lead his crusade against humanity. Stopping only in the Age of Empires universe to steal Napoleon’s clothes, Barton has mercilessly moved between game worlds and massacred anyone who dares to stand in his was, and as of yesterday evening, only a long, brutal and extremely graphic siege on Club Penguin stands between his army of the dammed and complete domination. The sole positive of the ordeal however has been the coming together of humanity

doegox

Barton down the hatches

As if football wasn’t shit enough already, Joey Barton has gone and Lance Armstronged everything up

to forget our differences and face this evil united. The border between North and South Korea has been completely reopened, a peace treaty has been signed in Syria and Usher has wholeheartedly apologised for

Justin Bieber. Upon leaving for the emergency meeting of the UN, David Cameron had this to say: “It’s the spirit of the Blitz, all for one and one for all in the face of grave adversity. It’s just odd that the adversity big

enough to bring World Peace came from Joey Barton and Microsoft, although on second thoughts we probably should have seen it coming”. The real Joey Barton was unavailable for comment.

recent radical move saw Elections Committee has recommended replacing the entire Students’ Union Officer Elections process with a set of five Master Swords. The reform was initially proposed by Media Officer Elliot Campbell, who explained the reasoning behind it: “As the legendary blade of evil’s bane, the Master Sword can only be wielded by those with a strong, righteous mind.” “We believe this is a better way of judging students’ suitability for the role of SU Officer than any elections process can ever hope to match. It also means much less work for us.” Not all reactions were so positive, however. Nicolas Cage, warned; “We all know what happened last time the Master Sword was made the guardian of ultimate power. It allowed someone to take a bunny out of a box. Who knows what could happen next time. He then proceeded to put a bunny that was previously not in a box, in a box.

Simon O’Kane, a PhD student who takes pride in being an insufferable know-it-all, added: “What happens if someone under 18 and therefore ineligible to be a trustee pulls it out? Do they get frozen in time until they’re old enough or something?” The controversial measure has been submitted to the Returning Officer, an obscure staff member of an obscure organization known as the National Union of Students (NUS) for formal approval. This isn’t the only power shift that seems to be seamlessly hemming itself into our institution. On Thursday 7th November his Royal Highness The Prince Edward, Earl of Wessex KG GCVO was installed as Chancellor of the University in a lavish ceremony at Bath Abbey on Thursday 7th November, followed by an event known as “Open House”, which ironically required a University ID to enter. The Students’ Union worked very hard to organise a showcase of Society and Sports Club performances for the after-

Who’s really in power? More often than not it’s just an evil purple bear

noon, to please the chancellor. Didn’t want him to be angry, apparently, you wouldn’t like him when he’s angry. The new Chancellor only actually watched two of them. The student groups responded by showcasing vari-

ous different types of tantrum: Trampolining jumped on things, Gravity Vomit threw up in unison, Kickboxing took their anger our on Latin and Ballroom who merely applied copious amounts of glitter; all to rounds of ap-

plause. Medals were awarded to those who could eat an apple using no hands. Open House was rounded off with the grand opening of the Chancellor’s Building, despite the building having already been open for six weeks. Some students complained about the strong Security presence, presumably there to protect the Chancellor from anyone mistaking him for Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne. Squatters are still a problem, thought the university is denying their existence. When asked to explain the role of Chancellor, SU President Ellie Hynes sighed: “The Chancellor has little real power; the bureaucrats are in control now.” Vice-Chancellor Professor Dame Glynis Breakwell added: “The Chancellor’s job is not to wield power but to distract people from it.” A spokesperson for the ViceChancellor denied rumours that she uttered the word ‘Omni shambles’ upon learning that the live video feed of the installation ceremony cut out during her speech. KAZVorpal

Simon O’Kane Editor-in-Cheif

Pasukaru76

Changes in the Political Ocarina

Monday 18th November 2013

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Horoscopes

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Sex Column written by Edie Bond

 Scorpio

October 23 - November 21



You have a special party thrown for you this week, Munchkins everywhere, you may be getting old, older than most of the people you surround yourself with, but you’re going to get SERIOUSLY LAID all month. Rejoice.

Sagittarius

November 22 - December 21



Capricorn

Lies Thru A Lens

Firey ashes surround your multiple pairs of slippers as you clamber from your bed in the morning, you’re tripping over because in the confusion you can’t see the slippers ‘neath the soft warm grey clouds from your ankles downwards – you know what you need to do, buy fewer slippers.

December 22 - January 20

Do you ever get the feeling you’re being watched... by me, that guy who stands outside your window in a bathrobe whacking oﬀ to pictures of dogs. That’s me that is.

Aquarius



January 21 - February 19



Pisces

Every time you have a jaeger-bomb you’ll February 20 - March 20 lose a few braincells sure, you might lose Firsts seem to be abundant lately, you a few pennies, some dullard bystanders find yourself in a lot of new situations… might call you a feggle… one thing’s for not knowing who to fist is a problem sure though, your cough will go away. not all of us face. So just fist everyone. Seems like a logical solution.

 Aries

March 21 - April 20 Things seem to be getting worse, you are unsure of yourself a lot. That’s because you’re only supposed to have a few cough sweets a day, maybe, NOT eating them all day every day forever, is that good for you? NO. They’re just fucking sweets, eat some fruit.



Gemini

 Taurus

May 21 - June 20

She doesn’t love you.

April 21 - May 20

Stop coughing so loudly, everyone’s staring at you, and you and your mother have never really seen eye to eye, it’s the cough sweet thing.

The element of role-playing during sex is everywhere around us right now: walk into any Ann Summers shop and you’re surrounded by sexy French maid outfits, novelty thongs, handcuffs and more toys than Toys ‘R’ Us. There’s media hype every left, right and centre – think of the controversy surrounding Robin Thicke’s ‘Blurred Lines’, Miley Cyrus sexualising teddy bears, and of course the powerful influence of the modern day role-play bible: Fifty Shades of Grey. But what is it that makes us so fascinated by the concept of dress up? Why do we get so turned on by pretending to be someone or something else? So what is role play exactly? For most people, it’s the way in which two (or more) people act out roles in a sexual fantasy. That’s if we look at it merely as a basic description – but it’s a much deeper form of sex than that. There are so many different personal reasons as to why people indulge in this type of sex, but for most it’s a form of freedom. It’s an explosive erotic out-

 Cancer

June 21 - July 21

November really annoys you because you can’t grow facial hair, in fact, you don’t have July 22 - August 22 any hair anywhere. Or finDon’t let yourself get into the friend gernails. Better lay off the zone or you might find yourself snuggling Zima. Anyway, don’t get up to a picture or your sister this winter. upset, just go on a killGive that picture to me and get in to THE ing rampage. DANGER ZONE.



Leo

let from a banal mundane life. To simply be yourself during sex is simply not enough for some people nowadays. Sexual role play oﬀers a potential steamy sex session which allows people to overcome many of their sexual inhibitions – at any time or any place (providing that it’s legal). It’s a personal permission granted to access your innermost desires and desperate fantasises. And there are so many possibilities to try out with your partner; prisoner and prison guard, teacher and naughty school girl, even Beauty and the Beast… Also, role play has the potential to go international with the inﬂux of modern technology. You can display your innermost sexual fantasies through social media, email, Skype, websites such as BDSM.com. You don’t have to even limit it to one person – you can invite audiences (hello Amsterdam!), do it outside – it’s your fantasy; as long as it is legal, consensual, and includes some element of morality – go wild. It’s an escape from the real world, it’s freedom, it’s control over being who you want without normal social implications. You can immerse yourself in a world that you’ve created. You’re basically the god of your sex life. If you’re thinking about role playing yourself, remember to be safe, legal and ensure that it is consensual (not all girls want it, Robin Thicke!) and most of all, have fun.

 Libra

 Virgo

August 23 - September 22

Who cares, JUST LOOK AT THE CATS, they’re fucking amazing!

September 23 - October 22 Crayons have become a staple food, white is black, up is down, left is right and Brian Neve is now lecturing coherently. It seems the whole world has gone to shit, oh well, at least you’ll learn something about American Politics

Illustrations illustrated by Charles Bertram Jones Horoscopes written by a Clay Pigeon

Monday 18th November 2013

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Snuzzly Puzzly Zone

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Quick Quiz

Subdivide the grid into regions such that each contains exactly one dot, about which it has 180-degree rotational symmetry.

Enter the numbers 1–5 into the grid so that each number appears precisely once in each row and column. A greaterthan sign (>) between two cells indicates that one number must be larger than its neighbour.

Rectangulon

For crossword solutions, visit our facebook page and like, to view.

Inequality

1. Elvis Presley performed his final concert on June 26, 1977 in which US state capital? 2. In July 1999, Billy Mitchell became the first person to achieve the maximum score of 3,333,360 points in which arcade game? 3. What is the scientific name for the boa constrictor? 4. Who presented the first ten series of MasterChef (UK)? 5. The Great Fire of London began with a fire at a bakery on which street? 6. Before it was effectively abandoned in 2009, what was the largest denomination of the Zimbabwean dollar? 7. Which English county town did Charles Dickens call "the dullest and most stupid spot on the face of the earth"? 8. Which comedian has had tours entitled Bewilderness, Part Troll, Tinselworm and Dandelion Mind? 9. Wetsuits are most commonly made from which synthetic rubber? 10. Sirius, the brightest star in the night sky, is part of which constellation?

Quiz Answers: 1. Indianapolis 2. Pac-Man 3. Boa constrictor (!) 4. Loyd Grossman 5. Pudding Lane 6. 100 trillion dollars 7. Chelmsford 8. Bill Bailey 9. Neoprene 10. Canis Major Box of fun created by... well we don’t know who

Pinwheels

Liu peng

Subdivide the grid into rectangles such that each contains precisely one numbered square and has area equal to that number. Puzzles created by Dorian Lidell

This week’s box of fun isn’t fun at all, it has a picture of a starving African child. GIVE SOME MONEY TO CHARITY